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What's New In IF? Issue 33 (2024)
By Aj, Dion, Briar, Jen and Peter
Now Available!
Itch.io - Keep Reading below
If you read the zine, consider liking the post: it helps us see how many people see it! And sharing is caring! <3
~ EDITORIAL ~
The new year is upon us!
To give us more free time during the holidays, the Team decided to merge last and this week’s Issues together.
The same will be done with the next Issue, which will come out on January 4th! This makes this Issue the last Issue of the year.
More feedback?
As the year comes to an end we in the WNIIF team are once again looking for feedback! The goal of this form is to find out our readers' preferences and wishes, so we can make the 2025 edition even better!
Please spare a few minutes to fill it out. None of the questions are required, so you can answer only what you want!
Small Talk with Harris Powell-Smith! @hpowellsmith
Our Interviewers are currently working on a Interview with the awesome Harris Powell-Smith, an award-winning narrative designer and writer of the Crème de la Crème series and Blood Money!
Do you have something you always wanted to ask them? Now is your chance! Send us a message on one of our socials or send us an e-mail. We’ll ask them for you!
We hope you enjoy this new issue!
AJ, DION, BRIAR, JEN AND PETER
~ BE A PART OF THE ZINE ~
THIS ZINE ONLY HAPPENS WITH YOU!
Want to write 1-2 pages about a neat topic, or deep-dive into a game and review it in details? Share personal experiences or get all academic?
WRITE FOR THE COLUMN!
Prefer to be more low-key but still have something to share? Send us a Zine Letter or share a game title for Highlight on…!
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU!
Came across something interesting? Know a release or an update announced? Saw an event happening? Whether it's a game, an article, a podcast… Add any IF-related content to our mini-database!
EVERY LITTLE BIT COUNTS!
Contact us through Tumblr asks, Forum DMs, or even by email! And thank you for your help!!
~ EVENT SPOTLIGHT : Velox Turbo 2 ~
December 13th to 17th 2024
Velox Turbo is a challenge edition of Velox Fabula (or "Quick Story"), which is a ranked jam about making a complete visual novel based on a community-determined theme, hosted by robobarbie and Allie Vera. The Velox Turbo edition gives creators 4 days (instead of the usual 10) to complete their project, encouraging speed, accurate scope setting, and creativity.
The Velox jam series is heavily inspired by Ludum Dare, a global game jam about making a game from scratch based on a certain theme in a short amount of time.
This Jam's theme: The Eye of the Beholder, was revealed at the start of the jam. Voting was held across several rounds in the week leading up to the jam starting.
Other themes in the Velox jam series were:
Unreliable Narrator
Morally Ambiguous Promise
Enemies with Benefits
Flower Symbolism
Doomed by the Narrative
Trapped with Someone
Forbidden Romance
You Shouldn't Be Here
Participants can now vote for their favourites until December 31st. There are six categories: Overall, Theme Incorporation, Narrative, Visuals and Sound. Even tho you can't vote unless you submitted your own work, definitely check out at least one of the 15 entries!
~ ENDED ~
The voting for A Very Hallmark Game Jam is over. Check out the results!
This year’s Yuri Game Jam is in over. There’s an unbelievable number of 109 entries to check out!
Another bitsy jam has ended. You can now check out 8 entries with the theme "better late than never".
~ ONGOING (SUBMITTING) ~
Media depicting healthy examples of polyamory isn’t that common. The PolyJamorous 2024 is trying to break the status-quo!
The Queer Winter Game Jam is in full swing. Those interested can submit their work until January 16th 2025.
ShuffleComp is a musical interactive fiction competition where you make games based on songs, which are submitted by other entrants. Creators have until January 20th 2025 to upload their works.
Once upon a time, a game jam was held to create stories around the theme of fairy tales… and that game jam is the Once Upon A Time VN Jam. It’s running from October 1st to January 31st.
Concours de Fiction Interactive Francophone 2025 is for all French-speaking enthusiasts. Submissions are accepted March 3rd 2025.
Are you perhaps a fan of more somber, melancholic themes? Then check out the Dying Year - Visual Novel Jam! You have until the end of the year to participate.
The Black Visual Novel Jam is all about working with creative professional developers who work in visual novels to bring more Black stories to life. The goal is to create a space where Black creators can show their unique storytelling through visual novels.
IF Short Games Showcase 2024 is a great way to shine some new light on your projects made in the past year (Jan 1, 2024 to Dec 31, 2024), regardless of whether or not they are previously released! You have until January 15th 2025 to join.
Winter Visual Novel Jam 2024 is here! You have until January 1st 2025 to submit your projects.
Are you familiar with Decker? Then why not take a part in the Deck-Month 2?
SeedComp! is a 2-round interactive fiction game jam, focusing on creativity and the growth of ideas and the Sprouting Round has just started! Check out the Planting round for inspiration.
~ NEW RELEASE ~
Gentleman, Adventurer, Crocodile (Forked) is a twenty-second romp around the Victorian world in the company of an adventurous crocodile. It is a story filled with wondrous lands, strange people, wealth, power, friendship, betrayal, shipwreck and delicious pastry.
Murder Gods Play Pachinko (Super Videotome Engine) - A group of friends gathers in a remote house for the first time in two years. This is the place where Kaya took his life. Tensions are high, to say the least. The snowstorm isn't letting up. It appears they're trapped. The only company they have is each other. Little do they know -- time isn't on their side. He's on his way.
A new era begins in Maroland… The Ancient Talking Dragons have nearly all been annihilated… The Elves hide in their ancient mansions. The future belongs to humans… However, naive human wizards long for immortality. It’s only a matter of time before one of them finds something they can’t control. The Elves of Maroland is now available for free downloading in English language.
You are a prisoner of the jaguar empire, being forcibly marched by your captor to the blood pits at the heart of the empire. In your condition, your choices are limited -- but you refuse to let them have you. Escape your captor, explore the continent, and struggle for survival in this unique text-based roguelike, Wild Continent (Unity).
Echoes in the Deep (Twine) is an atmospheric, choice-driven narrative game set in a failing underwater research station. As Dr. Evelyn Moore, you must uncover the station's secrets, restore failing systems, and escape before time runs out. Will you survive the depths, or will its mysteries drag you under?
Calmaria is the newest companion app developed by the Design School in partnership with the Informatics College, the Student Engagement Office, and the Diversity, Equity and Inclusion Office of the University of ≭∘⊊⊚. Please enjoy Calmaria.
Dive even deeper into the world of A Date with Death with an all-new route. Starting with a fresh Day 6 and unfolding all the way through Day 10, this DLC brings you new conversations, stunning art, four new endings, and of course, the same beloved Grim Reaper. - A Date with Death - Beyond the Bet (Ren’Py). @twoandahalfstudios
As always, don't forget to check out the submitted entries to the events mentioned in the previous pages. They deserve some love too!
~ NEW RELEASE (WIP) ~
Everyone knows vampires: bloodthirsty, unholy creatures, some barely any better than animals. You never thought you'd become one yourself. You're a believer in the new gods - but here you are, trying not to feel that they've abandoned you. Feed, fight, and flee from the sun, all while looking for a cure to turn your life, or lack of it, right again in Glass Fangs (Twine). @glassfangsif
You are the heir to the Dracian kingdom, born of dragon blood and royal lineage—but you know nothing of this truth. To protect you from the tyrannical king of Dracia—your own grandfather—your parents sacrificed their lives. They hid you away, ensuring the prophecy that foretells his downfall would survive, even if they could not. - Rise of the Forsaken (CScript).
Dazzling phantom thief heists, romantic meetings in the dead of night, and making a name for yourself; The Mysterious Thief, Forget Me Not (Ren’Py) is a mostly linear girl's love visual novel that features multiple POVs throughout. The story is set in the fictional city of Twinbells, England, and shows how the lives of our four main characters are changed forever when a ballet company — and its treasured jewel — visits the phantom thief-loving city. @solsketchbook
Rigor Mortis (Ren’Py) is a visual novel for goths of all stripes who are surviving under late-stage capitalism. Discover the adventures of Lunis Culpeper, 12-year-old newlydead, as she learns about (un)life in the (under)world the hard way.
Your life as an alchemist has been safe and comfortable so far... but when your sister makes you one last wish before passing away, you'll embark on a dangerous journey that might change your life—and the lives of your two companions—forever. Hopefully, you'll also learn to see the world in a new light after this Trek to Dead Water (Ren’Py).
Take centre stage as a former-rockstar turned actor navigating your new career and the chilling grip of fan-obsession in Scapegoated (CScript). Your once-famous band may be nothing short of a ghost of the past to you, but the rest of the world cannot seem to let go. The split in 1968 was scandalous, abrupt and mysterious. And although you’ve thrown yourself into acting and secured your first major role with a big time Hollywood director, whispers of blame have been on your tail ever since.
You are the illegitimate child of King Aldric the ruler of one of the seven kingdoms Ceryndor, marked by your half elven heritage and shunned by society. Born under a cloud of prejudice and tragedy, you are feared as the “Black Wolf” – an omen of misfortune and a harbinger of chaos. When the son of a wealthy trader is found dead, the fragile peace in your land begins to crumble. The investigation leads you to uncover secrets that could shake the foundations of the seven kingdoms. Will you embrace the tyranny they accuse you of, or will you rise above the scars of your past and forge your own path in War of Crowns (CScript)?
A Life in a Year (Unity) is a narrative-driven adventure game that explores the emotional challenges of studying abroad. You play as Laura, a 16-year-old exchange student in a Nordic country. The game navigates themes like language barriers, cultural differences, friendship, family, and more.
Your trade as a Keeper is suffering under the rule of the current Emperor, but you've just gotten lucky – the Summit Library, the largest and most important Library in the Eawin Empire, has requested your services. But when you arrive you suddenly find yourself in a dangerous magical mystery: something's wrong with the books, and the Library is falling apart at the seams. Also, there might be a war? But The Summit Library is situated on neutral territory, so that doesn't affect you... Right?
~ UPDATES ~
A Sun Asunder: Post Apocalypse (CScript) updated their demo. @asapostapocalypseif
Meteoric (CSscript) added new content to their demo.
REMEMBER, YOU WILL DIE (CSscript) released Chapter 5. @vapolis
The Ultimate Magic Student (CScript) updated their demo.
Thicker Than (CScript) released their monthly update on Ko-Fi. @barbwritesstuff
Virtue’s End (CScript) updated their Patreon demo. @virtues-end
A Warmth in the Cold (CScript) added new content to the demo.
Spire, Surge and Sea (CScript) updated a new second Chapter.
The Adventures of Alaric Blackmoon (ADRIFT) released Episode 10.
Sentience (Twine) released Chapter 5. @sentience-if
Adrift With You (CScript) released Chapter 2. @kathrinesadventures
A Shriek of Ash and Fire (CScript) released Update 6. @krogpile
Drink Your Villain Juice (CScript) updated their demo. @drinkyourvillainjuice
Oh Mother, Where Are Thou? (CScript) updated their demo.
Dragon Kin (CScript) added new content to their demo.
Soulmates Inc (CScript) is back with a new update. @soulmatesinc-if
Voiceless: A Siren’s Song (CScript) released a re-written Chapter 1.
War of the Divines (CScript) updated their demo.
Hunter’s Requiem (CScript) added new content to their demo. @huntersrequiem-if
~ OTHER ~
Crown of Exile (Twine) offers a limited Access up to Chapter Ten for all their readers. Check it out before it’s too late! @ramonag-if
The Rosebush released an Interview with Chandler Groover, an interactive fiction author known for his influential games such as Eat Me, Toby’s Nose and Midnight. Swordfight., as well as his contribution in Fallen London’s storylines. @the-rosebush-mag
Devil On Your Shoulder is looking for beta testers.
~
As always, we apologize in advance for missing any update or release from the past week. We are only volunteers using their limited free time to find as much as we can - but sometimes things pass through the cracks.
If you think something should have been included in this week's zine but did not appear, please shoot us a message! We'll do our best to add it next week! And if you know oncoming news, add it here!
~ MAYBE YOU NEXT? ~
We did not get a submission this week. But if you have an idea for a short essay, or would like a special space to share your thoughts about IF and the community...
Shoot us an email!
~ HIGHLIGHT ON ~
A couple of games that we thought were cool.
I.A.G Alpha by techniX (INSTEAD)
The interactivity turns the idea of an IF piece on its head!
//submitted by Max//
The Master of the Land by Pseudavid (Twine)
A night of celebration with many storylines to explore. Replay again and again to understand, not to win.
//submitted by Sera//
Wonderland Noir: Behind the Looking Glass by Slim Pickens (Ink)
Delves into heavy topics, reminds me of Disco Elysium. Incredibly evocative writing, almost no attention given.
//submitted by Mouthofdirt//
Your favourite game here?
Do you have a favourite game that deserves some highlighting?
An old or recent game that wowed you so much you spam it to everyone?
Tell us about it! And it might appear here!
WE LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU ALL! WHETHER IT'S GOOD OR BAD, OR EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN...
Have something to say? Send us a message titled: Zine Letter!
As we end this issue, we would like to thank:
Max, Sera and Mouthofdirt
For sending us a Highlight!!
And as always, huge thanks to all you readers who liked, shared, and commented on last week's issue!
What might be tiny actions are huge support and motivators to us!
Thank you for cheering us on this journey!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
We all wish you a great start to next year!
We will see you in January with a 2025 edition of What’s New in IF!
AJ, DION, BRIAR, JEN AND PETER
WHAT'S NEW IN IF? 2024-ISSUE 33
#NEW ISSUE IS OUT!!#What's New in IF#interactive fiction#if news#visual novel#parser#choice of games#choicescript#twine#ink#twine games#ink games#itch.io#interactive game#interactive novel#IF#games#hobby#indie dev#choose your own adventure#if-whats-new#zine
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Hello, my friends!
Just wanted to pop in with some info and updates.
*The "Cursed Birthday" won the 2k follower celebration poll. Sorry dads! I don't have an ETA for that just yet. I may write it here and there until the end of the year as the motivation strikes. I think the easiest way to tell the tale would be from Oswin's POV or even a shifting POV between him and Da (Kip). I'll decide for sure once I begin to write it. Also playing with the idea of doing this in Twine to make it playable. That way you could put your MC's specifics in for maximum emotional damage.
*I will still write things about the dads though, so all my Papa and Da fans out there won't be left in the dark forever.
*I will be "patching" Chapter 5 in the near future. I redid Zahn's scene (again) which gave me such a headache on release day. I formatted the beginnings in a much more streamlined way and fixed some bugs. When I have more time to sit and go through error reports, and make more corrections to typos, grammar, and code - then I will put the patch through.
*All chapters will be getting a scrub for issues in the text in the coming months. I will do my best to find them, but self-editing is very difficult (there's good reason that professional editors exist). In the future, I may need to ask for testers/editors.
*ASKS will be changing a bit. I do not know the full extent of how because it's a trial by fire. The rules will be updated as I come across things. But, here's why:
Spoiler prevention - as much as it is possible, I want to limit spoiling content for both new and existing readers. Not just for the plot points that are developing, but also for our mystery suitor who will have a lot of unraveling in the coming chapters. I will probably make a specific tag for answers that may contain spoilers, but some of the issue is the information in the Ask itself, which I can't hide. I may opt to compile these in a big post like once a month or so. This way, if anyone does not want to see anything spoilery, it's easier to avoid.
Time management - reaction asks specifically will remain limited and they will honestly have to be a lower priority depending on the condition of my inbox. I am very sorry for this, but these can take an inordinate amount of time. I write this IF in my downtime from work and personal life, and I also use those moments to manage Tumblr. I need to balance those so I can work toward releasing more of the IF.
Patreon - I still plan to give Patreon a go probably starting January. This will help me fund things for the game, such as art, and help me justify spending even more of my time writing chapters and extras. But like everything else, I will need to allot time to work on these things.
Personal Development - I'm taking a coding class! I can work on it at my leisure and it won't take a ton of time during the week, but it will take me out of my Tumblr time a little bit I think. Fingies crossed, I will learn a lot that will help me code a better game for you!
*Inbox - I have several Asks awaiting responses about chapter 5. As noted above, I am holding these due to spoilers to give readers a chance to catch up. (I may opt to compile these in one large post.)
Anyway, that's all for now (it's at least all I currently remember, lol).
Take care, all!
~Lunan ^_^
#god cursed if#asks#twine if#if wip#twine wip#gc ro reactions#interactive novel#if game#interactive fiction#probably need to sort out my tags too..
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I know tumblr isn't the largest space for TwoSet fandom, but in case anyone wanted a summary of last night's livestream:
The livestream was cozy, comfortable, and lowkey. We started it by ordering bubble tea. They were in their old, beloved Brisbane location.
They will restore all the videos, probably sometime today or tomorrow.
They will also try to reinstate the Instagram posts, though asked for patience because they're not sure how to do that.
They hid the videos because of an underestimation of fan sentiment. They didn't think people watched those old videos anymore, so they figured curate the chaff and just leave a few they were proud of for people to dig into and interact with.
They were receptive to this being the wrong choice, apologized, and talked about how in retrospect they could've done this better and communicated faster. They seemed in the know about different fan theories that popped up during the 50 days of silence.
B2TSM was definitely a passion project and it was a ton of work over the course of a year. They said they paid mid-six figures for these music videos and will be losing money off them.
They are closing down their store and once the latest round of merch for their music videos is gone, there will be no more merch.
They will not quit touring. There is now an official interest sign-up for a 2025-2026 World Tour on their website.
Their immediate plan is to take a break. They got as exhausted as they were during the kickstarter days when they were busking 24/7 on the streets.
After that... they don't know. They admit it's scary. But they want to keep forging new ground and finding new ways to advance classical music. Their mission to keep promoting classical music is ongoing.
Their last video (released today) is meant to speak to how they've felt about the last eleven years. They spoke positively and said they will never forget this chapter of their lives.
They are done-done making videos. Not to say it's impossible another won't happen (ex: TwoSet Talks), but it's best and most accurate to just say they're done-done.
TwoSet Academy is still being talked about in a vague fashion, though they did mention they have interest in promoting classical music education. So feel free to still sign up for that. Frankly it sounds like they're still figuring out what it'll entail.
They have multiple ideas of what to do next, but it'll take time for those to be honed into something good.
You can sign up for a newsletter for project and life updates to hear when they get around to it.
Since everyone was asking about health, again, they did get exhausted, but both are healthy. Brett's mysterious medical condition from 2020-2021 that people were concerned was an ongoing life thing sounds more like it was a one-time deal that exploded out from stress. He told us it was life-threatening, though, which was.... information. Relieved all over again that he got better.
They honestly but respectfully went through all the major controversies that have happened in the last year because fans asked about them. They tried to avoid going into drama or ripping into privacy, but acknowledged when something had already played its course, so answers were now okay to say. There were a few times where I think they didn't know both sides of a situation, but that's the normal and inescapable experience of being human, and insofar as everything they knew, they came off authentically and honestly in how they handled each scenario.
Controversies they went through included: the workplace allegations on reddit from 2023, the falling out with Jordan He after Fantasia, their distanced relationship with Ray Chen, and issues with content creators being inauthentic and chasing measurements like views and subscribers.
They seem like genuinely good and authentic guys. My respect to them, and I feel at peace with the whole situation.
Whole livestream just felt healing. If you want to go and hang out with Brett and Eddy, go do it there.
If you stumble into them on the streets, please go up and still say "hi."
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Welcome to the YuuriVoice Tumblr!
A relic of a time long past, with echoes that remain ever present, you stand on the precipice of ground zero. This is where it all began. What was once a Yuri on Ice audio blog evolved into this wild thing we find ourselves strapped to.
Welcome! I'm Yuuri, a voice actor, writer, director, and maker of questionable noises. I'm part ASMRtist, part storyteller, part Vtuber, part smut peddler. I wear many hats, and to my shock they're not as ill fitting as I expected.
This blog is a wasteland of uncategorized shenanigans and information. I have not had the spoons to organize and maintain it in any other way than a vehicle for promotion and answering questions from the community that makes its home here on Tumblr.
You can find me and my work here:
YouTube for all narrative & SFW audios.
Patreon for behind the scenes updates + NSFW audios.
Twitter for more consistent nonsense updates.
Merch and other goodies here.
And basically every other platform you can think of @ yuurivoice.
How The YV Tumblr Functions
In general, you can send me questions through the Ask Box, and you'll spot me posting in the #yuurivoice tag plus additional tags for specific characters and series. That's about the most organization you're gonna get because my brain is capable of just about that much before I'll forget something and miscategorize things.
That also being said, be wary of various triggers. For anything big and obvious, I'll try and tag, but I won't be getting super granular in that regard. This also relates to my brain, because if someone asks "hey can you tag (specific thing)" I promise you I will end up forgetting then the person I said I'd look out for gets smacked in the face. So it's less about "idgaf" and more that in cases where I feel I cannot personally protect an individual, I'd rather them protect themselves and just know my big dumb ass will fail them.
Some general notes, boundaries, etc:
I'm literally just a guy checking his app at 3am on the shitter, there will be typos, I will forget things, if someone makes me uncomfortable I'll tell them
My tone may not always be clear, no I will not consistently use indicators, the best you're getting out of me is a lol or an emoji
My humor is dry, and my tolerance for nonsense is thin
Despite the above, I have had 99.9% positive experiences around here, most folks find me palatable, you may not and that's okay
Do NOT come to me slandering my peers, I have a zero tolerance policy for this
Do NOT press me for content of your specific blorbo
The list goes on, but genuinely if you are just chill there's never gonna be any issue, I am just a guy and you can treat me as such
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: Who is your favorite character to voice? A: Depends at the time you ask me, in general I enjoy them all a great deal because I wouldn't do it if I didn't enjoy it. But in truth, Alphonse (and Charlie) are probably the easiest for me to slide right into and that makes doing the work easy. Not sure if that's a "favorite" but ease of work matters significantly to me because ADHD.
Q: When will you do a (insert character) audio? A: Bold of you to assume I know when I'm doing anything at all. I am always contemplating when the next audio for a character will be, but my interests come and go in waves. If you ask me kindly on any given day, I'll probably give you a genuine answer. If you ask this in relation to content getting posted that wasn't that character, I will tell you to go fuck yourself. It's all about time and place. lol
Q: When will the next (insert series) video be out? A: Again, bold of you to assume I know, but also the answer is always changing for every series. BitterSweet and its associated projects are the most committed and consistent I've been with any artist pursuit in my entire life. Again, if you just ask me how a project is going on any given day, I'll likely give you an update. Just know that I heap an immense amount of pressure onto myself, so ask gently otherwise I'll feel guilty and cry about it. Not really, but also, don't test me.
Q: Are you taking commissions? A: Nope, haven't taken commissions in a loooooong time, and don't foresee it happening again, with a few exceptions for fundraisers and giveaways.
Q: I have this headcanon that (insert character fact). A: Don't ask me to confirm your headcanons, I will forget what anonymous message a Tumblr user asked me one day out of the blue and what my answer was. I avoid giving factoids, granular details, etc. because I'll just absolutely forget it the moment I hit post. I encourage you to use your imagination and don't bother seeking me for validation, you should just have fun playing pretend because that's exactly what got us here in the first place! <3
Q: Did (insert character) do this because (insert idea)? A: Any question like this that specifically asks for deliberate information that would lead to a spoiler, character revelation, etc. is not worth asking. While I appreciate that you might be asking the correct question, the whole reason I wrote the plot to make you ask that question is that you'd get that answer in the content itself, not from some asshole on the internet on a Tumblr blog (aka me).
Q: Why did you start making audios/YT videos/etc? A: In 2016, the anime Yuri!!! on Ice was a phenomenon that took the internet, and my life, by storm. I started this blog to make audios for the protagonist Yuuri Katsuki, as a hobby and way to participate in the fandom. Eventually, people wanted to commission me. Then, other characters and voices, specifically Guzma (Pokemon), Sidon (LoZ Breath of the Wild), and Aizawa (My Hero Academia) exploded in popularity and increased my following. When the Tumblr apocalypse happened and NSFW content was getting nuked, I pivoted to YouTube. I began to create original characters to fulfill standard Boyfriend Experience and Erotic audios, and slowly a connective narrative started to take shape, eventually becoming BitterSweet.
Q: What inspired you to make BitterSweet? A: Alphonse was originally inspired by my Stardew Valley character, which also inspired the setting of his audios. Seth was created to be a rival to Alphonse, with a visual novel style branching path for listeners to enjoy if they wanted Seth. However, as I began to write, I discovered a much deeper story between the two characters and I chose to follow that thread over the standard moment to moment experience style scenario. Several episodes later, it became clear that this was a narrative series that wasn't quite like my past work. The themes and ideas largely spawn from my own lived experiences, wrapped up in two pretty boys and their listener as they experience the healing magic of love in all of its forms!
Q: Is the BitterSweet Trio polyamorous? A: During the course of BitterSweet, Alphonse and Boo share their unconditional love with Seth, hoping to nurture the parts of him that have weathered away with time and trauma. This love is explicitly undefined, so that listeners can interpret the relationship dynamic as best suits them, as the trio represents no one specific type of love, but rather the healing of unconditional love. For some that may be best experienced romantically, and others may prefer it to be platonically, or even familially.
The beauty of it is that there is no incorrect interpretation, and every possibility is equally valid. This medium of self insert audio content allows for a collaborative fantasy between creator and listener, and is a strength unto itself.
Q: I need clarity on this specific plot point/lore thing! A: I'm typically happy to answer non-spoilery questions, but also I am actively working on a Wiki that should help folks who need a quick reference for any particular character or story!
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Treats!
The first batch of requests is in! You can find them under the cut. You can also find them right here =D
Request by kbirb Ted Lasso (TV) Keeley Jones/Roy Kent/Jamie Tartt my BLORBOS cubed no rape/non-con/dub-con please! happy, slice-of-life preferred for these 3
Request by kbirb Our Flag Means Death (TV) Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet/Israel Hands Oh Steddiehands. Another ship that's all angst, all hurt/comfort, rarely fluff. Feel free to lean into the darkness - provided there's no rape/noncon or suicide. Sure, I'd love a fluffy, slice-of-life podfic for these three. But I know that might be very difficult to do. So hurt me, I'm fine with that.
Request by kbirb CT-21-0408 | CT-1409 | Echo/CT-27-5555 | ARC-5555 | Fives/CC-1010 | Fox [points] hurt them No but this is one of those ships where things don't seem to need to be sunshine and roses for me to love the fic. Give me angst. Give me angst no comfort. Give me hurt/comfort. Or give me pure fluff! Slice of life!! Throw these 3 at a wall and see what sticks and I will find joy in it. No rape/non-con please.
Request by kbirb CT-21-0408 | CT-1409 | Echo/CT-27-5555 | ARC-5555 | Fives/CT-782 | Hevy Sometimes my brain thinks I made this ship up and I'm so glad when it pops up as a taggable ship. Anyway, caveat would just be that I don't want rape/non-con. Otherwise, any character added into the mix is good. Oh and no Codex. For these three, I really prefer happy and fluff fics, but I also do like hurt/comfort fics!! But Hevy must live.
Request by kbirb Batman - All Media Types, Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics) Roy Harper/Koriand'r/Jason ToddRoy HarperKoriand'r (DCU)Jason Todd This right here is my DC OT3 for sure. I'm such a JayRoy shipper but throw Kori into the mix??? [chef's kiss] Caveats: I don't ship Batboys with one another and I don't want rape/non-con. Otherwise, go hog wild! Found a fic that's the OT3 but with another character or characters added in? Go for it. Just no Batboys being ship with Jay please!
Request by kbirb Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi/Quinlan VosCC-1010 | Fox/Bail Organa/Breha Organa I literally just would like happy, slice-of-life podfics of either of these ships. Or hurt/comfort. Also not even super restricted!!! You have a ship that has the 3 in the ship but there's a fourth person?? PLEASE, gimme, I will accept!!! Basically only restrictions are these: I don't ship Cody/Rex and I don't want any rape/non-con fics. Otherwise, go hog wild!!!!
Request by Flowerparrish Star Wars - All Media Types CT-21-0408 | CT-1409 | Echo/CT-27-5555 | ARC-5555 | Fives/CC-1010 | Fox LIterally anything for these three sfw or nsfw fine
Request by Flowerparrish Star Wars - All Media Types CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi/Quinlan Vos CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi/CT-7567 | Rex Additional: Fox/Quinlan/Jon Antilles likewise I just want the blorbos smushed together sfw or nsfw fine
Request by Flowerparrish Ted Lasso (TV) Keeley Jones/Roy Kent/Jamie Tartt happy ending for them would be great! sfw or nsfw fine
Request by Flowerparrish Leverage (US TV 2008) Alec Hardison/Parker/Eliot Spencer Happy or heartfelt! sfw or nsfw fine
Request by Flowerparrish Marvel, Batman - All Media Types, DCU (Comics) James "Bucky" Barnes/Clint Barton/Jason Todd Roy Harper/Koriand'r/Jason Todd James "Bucky" Barnes/Clint Barton/Steve Rogers chaos trio! sfw or nsfw fine
Request by Flowerparrish Star Wars - All Media Types Original Clone Trooper Character(s) (Star Wars) poly relationships featuring clone ocs!
Request by Flowerparrish The Tarot Sequence - K.D. Edwards Brand Saint John/Rune Saint John/Addam Saint Nicholas happy pls! sfw or nsfw fine!
Request by Flowerparrish Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg Eskel/Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion preference for happy ending, but angst is good if it ends hopeful/happy! hurt/comfort is delightful. miscommunication/misunderstandings sfw or nsfw fine!
Request by Flowerparrish Star Wars - All Media Types Poe Dameron/Finn/Rey happy and ignoring a lot of sequel movies canon preferred!
Request by korechthonia Jango Fett/Obi-Wan Kenobi/Myles the Mandalorian Jango Fett/Obi-Wan Kenobi/Satine Kryze CC-2224 | Cody/Jango Fett/Obi-Wan Kenobi Jango Fett/Obi-Wan Kenobi/Quinlan Vos Padmé Amidala/Jango Fett/Obi-Wan Kenobi Jango Fett/Obi-Wan Kenobi/a third is a recipe for politics, strong personalities, chaos, or some combination of the above and I am invariably here for it. no non-con or pwp please
#podfic#polyamory#polypodweek#polypodweek2024#treats!!#treats!!!!!!#these will likely be updated once a day on tumblr#so if you don't see your request on the list immediately#that's why C:
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#something is very obviously different about these two compared to my normal images on this blog. i acknowledge this#also the sv model is Really good. and since they always stare straight at the camera anyway… and no one pays attention to the background…#and the only high-quality phantump model i could find was so horribly shiny that its eyes were just white voids#in my defense‚ phantump always just stare straight at you in game#the lighting is different‚ yeah. that's probably the dead giveaway. beyond the background. but like. i'm the only being on the planet who#really likes phantump anyway. i feel like it's a generally forgettable pokémon to most folks#phantump#HELLO this one is a weird one. i have some explaining to do. so when i did this one i didn't know how to edit models really at all#and when i got the models for these‚ the xy models were super shiny. shiny to the point that it made their eyes fuckin invisible#and i decided that since you could barely tell it was phantump‚ i needed a different way to get these images#i remembered that in the SV dlc‚ every time you find a wild phantump‚ it just fucking. stares. at you. and i was like. aha#i kinda remembered because of the test stream that i did. tumblr user alligayytorr (am i getting the right amount of Ys) said#“haha i am getting a sneak peek” when i zoomed the camera in on a phantump. and i remembered that. and i was like. i can utilize this#and ended up using just an in-game screenshot of SV in replacement of the regular content. later on‚ after that#once we got into gen 7 and it became less and less reliable to find models‚ i had to learn how to edit them manually to remove the shine#i am a software dev. not a 3d modeler. this ended up coming down to editing the code of the models directly (which i ended up writing a#script to automate). now‚ today‚ january 22nd (the day of me writing these tags and updating this post)‚ i remembered this post was in the#queue and was not normal. so i went back‚ ran the script on the phantump and trevenant models‚ and unshinified them#then edited these two posts to be normal. i have left the original pictures i took under the cut for reference and as bonuses#because i really enjoy phantump. so that's why those images are there‚ and that's why these tags are here#just for posterity's sake‚ the folks who come here mostly for my commentary‚ i've left the ORIGINAL tags of the post when i initially#made it with the SV pictures up at the top (i wanted to rearrange them‚ but tumblr makes that Very difficult‚ so i left them as-is)#so if these tags are confusing to read i Apologize. but i hope now that you're at the bottom you understand what happened#i'm gonna go edit the trevenant post now
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i want to meet someone i feel anxious about approaching, i want to be fascinated, i want to learn, i want my hands to tremble when i hear them speak because what they're saying is bigger than me and i want to make effort to understand.
#dash and my sister my only human-shaped form of inspiration these days and i can't see them every day#and the draught is... insufferable. it's not the same as textbooks doing this to me. it doesn't feel as visceral when it's me and the pages#i need a human voice to say all of those things i'm reading about#i feel like i am becoming stupid like my thoughts are turning stale#i learn smth new every day but i need a fresh perspective i am bored of my own brain mechanisms it's like nobody updated them in a while#sharing too much on tumblr once again but this has been choking me for quite some time i need to get it out to move on#letters from stephanie*
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i had my last day of work today now im officially on veilguard leave WAHOOOOOOOOO <3 it was unfortunately the worst day i have ever had since i started working there djkfdjfkd but. tbh. it kind of just makes leaving feel even better so...... im considering today a win overall :)
#/ alcohol mention#< i also bought a bottle of sparkling wine to celebrate SURVIVING the datv wait and id always planned to but after today i feel like i#DESERVE to get drunk by myself at home on a wednesday. every girl deserves that once a year i think <3#man...... dawn of the final day huh......... we really did it joe...............#ok im leaving tumblr again just wanted to share my shitty day update and also say LOVE U ALL#esp the solas girlies..... i cannot wait to play thru this game and psychic mind meld w all of u during the pookie moments <3
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Fandom: Johnny the Homicidal Maniac (But really Vargas lol) Rating: Teen and up Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
What, exactly, did Scriabin take from Edgar when they separated?
My first multichapter fic for Vargas! :D Yay!
(Pls read Ch. 1 first - Ch. 2 is also recommended, but as long as you're caught up on the first, you're good to go!)
-----
Side B
What the fuck.
"It's, it's possible that if, maybe whatever happened earlier, whatever caused all that blood and for us to be knocked unconscious-"
What the fuck.
"-and if I suffered a head injury, then maybe-"
No. That's enough.
Scriabin pushed away from the closet door he'd defensively pressed himself up against and put his hands on Edgar's shoulders, which quieted him. He looked at him expectantly, with eyes that Scriabin somehow only just now realized were casually guarded, curious, uncertain in a way that denoted inexperience. That was so messed up, that was completely wrong. Edgar should've been on guard, absolutely, but only because he knew exactly what Scriabin was capable of. He really didn't want to look at him right now if this was what he was going to be seeing instead.
He spun him quickly and pushed him out the door before he could protest. He got one last look at those wide, confused eyes before he slammed the door behind him, bracing it shut with both hands for good measure.
What. The fuck. His head came forward, making a dull thud as his forehead connected with the door. He doesn't remember me? His fingers curled on the door. What does he mean he doesn't remember me?! How could he not know me?! One hand pushed through his hair; his scalp tingled and that was so weird, he felt it and it was so weird- We literally just- He literally just-! As if pulling him screaming into life wasn't bad enough, now he had decided to play some sick prank!
This can't be true. It's just like him to try and make jokes at the worst possible time, he has no tact.
There was a timid knock on the other side of the door. Scriabin jumped as it resonated through his skull, his elbow, pressed to the door with his hand buried in his hair, set his jaw. Then silence.
If he was really trying to get back in, clear things up, say he was only kidding, he'd actually try.
Nothing.
Scriabin's blood was ice as he went over it again. The way he'd said his name. The vacant look in his eyes as he said it, like his mouth knew its shape but none of the meaning. No fear, no realization, nothing that really felt like Edgar, just sound, just noise.
Maybe he really had-
Oh god. His knees gave out, and his arms had no practice at holding him upright, not yet. His hand slid down the door, his other hand guarding his head as his hair fluffed against the grain.
How could he do this
This is all his fault
Stupid, idiotic
He can't do this to me
I can't believe him
I can't believe this
How dare he leave me alone like this
Thoughts spiralling, and all he could do was hold himself down, press his fingers into the back of his neck, force his chest to his knees and maybe he wouldn't immolate under it all. He was shaking, from tension or fear he couldn't tell, his mind too hazardous and loud to cut through it all. He was shaking, dizzy, and if he moved, letting go would surely kill him.
He can't do this to me.
He breathed. And breathed. And swallowed. Eyes closed, heart pounding, sure. Confusion and dismay, whatever. Pain. Fine. So be it.
This isn't like me. A hand untethered from his vice grip in his hair, and he stayed attached to the floor. It connected with the carpet below him and became a new lifeline. He pushed up and away into a limp sit, arms already burning slightly from holding himself up after all that. He shook his head mildly. This isn't who I'm going to be in life. His body, this fear response be damned, he was in control now.
Regroup. Let's- a mental pause, barely a quarter of a second long as he turned the word in his head. Let's pretend it's all true- what does that mean?
He flopped over, leaned upright with his back against the door, heels of his fists pushed down into the carpet to scootch closer. Moving was so awkward still, very unfitting.
He was acting normal. Well, Edgar's baseline for "normal" had changed considerably, so maybe put an asterisk on that. Not that he was ever normal to begin with, but normal-for-Edgar, -ish. That means he has to have some memory.
Scriabin held out a hand, arm slung over his knee, one finger held out. He had recognized his glasses. One. The apartment. Two. Which key to use. Three. He had said Todd's name. Four.
His stuff can be discounted, he's had all that for a while. Back down to one. The kid is a new fixture. Which means he remembers the last couple months at least. He shook his head and brought his hand up to comb through his hair. Well...it's fuzzy for me, so it probably is for him, too. Scriabin remembered everything in as much clarity as the last couple months allowed, there was no way Edgar would know more even if he had all his memories.
Speaking of which, Scriabin could remember everything. He flipped through; the last two months and bringing Todd in, Edgar's parting words to Johnny, his and Devi's conversation - he grit his teeth - and further back, everything along the way, all the way back. False dreams, shared childhoods, everything that was once Edgar's alone, he still remembered it. Nothing was out of place which made it all the more strange!
This is so fucking weird, if I remember everything, then why would he-
He stopped short. His purported purpose had been to replace Edgar. Take him over completely. If he bought into the conceit for a moment, just to play in the space... He was alive now. That was not as intended; it shouldn't even have been possible.
Did he...give me his memories? Like, all the way? Not just to borrow, to shape him, give him legitimacy - he was alive now. His own person. Separate, embodied, and whole. Was this the price of life?
That's stupid. But possible, he couldn't discount. If this - he brought his hands up and looked down at them, watched himself touch his own chest and felt it beneath his coat, shirt, the nerves firing as his slid his fingers up himself - if this was possible, then...
He continued for a moment, curious and reverant, all of him new and privately exciting, to exist and to touch, to feel, smell, see, all of it clear and fresh and penetrated deeply into his mind, as if a layer of film had been lifted from his senses. The moment passed as the memories, unbidden but important, cluttered in around him again.
There were still a lot of questions, and most of them couldn't be answered without Edgar, ugh. If getting anything out of him before had been like pulling teeth, he was very sobered to think about how it might be now. Depending on how much Edgar remembered, maybe he could start piecing things together.
Did he do it on purpose? Did he know this would happen? There's no way he would have been willing to if he had- But he couldn't ask him things like that. Even if he did remember, admitting something like that...
He was just spinning his wheels at this point. Better to gather what he could from the man himself. He looked up, preparing to stand.
Ah-
The room was still in something of a state.
Edgar would be annoying, or at least distracted by trying to pick up the clothes and uncarefully unpacked items strewn about the floor from Scriabin's very successful excavation of his old glasses. The clutter would have to go if he wanted his full attention.
He grumbled as he pushed off the door to pick up the first few things. First day of life and I'm already his maid. Figures. He's always needed me to clean up after him.
Silence.
Somehow it only just hit him. Thinking alone in the late hours, planning things behind Edgar's back, it was nothing new. But a barb unsunk into his mental flesh was left out in the wide emptiness, poised to stab whoever happened upon it next, and he was the only one here.
He felt very small all of a sudden, and he didn't like it at all.
His eyes blankly scanned the room, looking for nothing, until they settled on the toy at Edgar's bedside. His toy.
He dropped the items he'd bundled into his arms and made his way over. He picked up the small simulacrum, turned it over in his hands once, and stared at it.
He wouldn't know this. Not really. He brushed a thumb up and over the little mouth, the contours of its small face. Retroactively, I've never been this at all.
I'm no one to him.
Does this mean we can start over? The thought struck him like lightning, freezing his heart in his chest. He was fixed solid, staring down at the small figure in his hands.
Before he could even think, he'd already thrown it through the open closet door, landing noisily in the box he'd dug through with a clatter. He grabbed up the fallen clothes and items and stuffed them back in the box, burying the toy in mundane detritus, then closed the cardboard flaps and slammed the door of the closet for good measure.
His breath was laboured and he glared, like wishing it gone would make the closet itself disappear.
Answers. He needed answers, more than anything.
He ripped the door open, and there was Edgar who looked up, staring dumbly back at him and carrying the clothes he'd shed earlier over his arm. Something in his mind clicked over, and he didn't think about it.
"Alright," he caught his breath for half a second, "what do you remember?"
Edgar just kept on staring, mouth open, eyes unconfident behind weak glasses. Scriabin huffed irritably, I don't have time for this, and moved towards him, arm outstretched.
"Come on." Edgar gave a small startled sound behind him as he grabbed his collar and dragged him through the doorway. He threw him across the room, not bothering to watch his arc as he closed the door behind him. The bed was that way, he'd be fine.
When he turned back, Edgar had managed to catch himself, though already halfway on the bed. Scriabin stood with his back to the door, feet planted and he crossed his arms. No more speculating around impossibilities, tangible and present as they might be, it was time for a proper interrogation. It was at least preferable to-
Edgar made a face at him and scooted back, offering a seat next to him on the bed. Equal footing briefly flashed through his mind and while he wouldn't consider it ideal, nothing today was really going his way. He sighed, then made his way over and sat across from Edgar, who was eyeing him with a certain degree of caution. At least the feeling was mutual.
"Spill." He re-crossed his arms and leaned towards Edgar. "What do you know?"
Edgar hesitated, apparently thinking, his hands laced and fingers agitatedly if quietly rubbing the backs of his hands.
"I want to verify some things first."
Scriabin snorted dismissively. Where had Edgar's overly-trusting nature gone? A serial killer, well he's an honoured guest, but Scriabin? He didn't even distrust him for the right reasons.
He gestured with an open hand, Go ahead, then tucked his arm back in.
"Todd's last name?"
Pfsh. At least it was proof enough that anything Edgar knew, Scriabin did as well. As expected.
"Casil. His stupid bear's called Shmee in case you forgot that too." Edgar shook his head. No he hadn't? If only he could just check!
"Do you know our phone number?" Obviously he did, so he rattled it off quickly, Edgar nodding in turn. He flipped his hair in time with the last digit, careful to keep his eyes covered. It was a bit of a timid attempt, being the first in this body, which was a minor blessing he supposed.
Edgar mulled over what he'd given him for a moment, then a moment longer, then a moment even longer. His eyes searched absently, gazing down into his own hand, his other on his chin, lightly thumbing his goatee. He was focused on names and numbers, but those were child's play compared to everything, everything Scriabin still wanted to know. It was frustrating on a visceral level, watching him struggle with such simple innocuous nothings while the most important person in his life was sitting right in front of him.
He was supposed to be the most important.
It was frustrating.
"You really don't remember anything, do you?" He didn't hide the sneer as it shaped his voice - odd the way his body just did that now, did things without him actively thinking them into being. Even things like the little waver that made its way in that he pushed back down and under. He was frustrated, angry, tired - any emotionality could be attributed to those, nothing else.
Edgar didn't answer, just kept his gaze locked to his face. That was almost worse. Watching him fumble through things, it wasn't fun, but at least he wasn't trying to pry. He could see him try to look past his bangs, and the fact that he didn't know better...
Scriabin looked away for a moment, then thought better of it. Best defense is a good offense.
He reached for Edgar's face, for those damn scars, ever-present reminders. Edgar shied away, not wanting to be touched suddenly by someone he didn't know. As if Scriabin had ever cared about that.
Well, things were different now. Maybe he didn't really want to touch him anyway. Not yet.
"Do you remember these...?" Instead he framed his face with his hands less than an inch from his skin, and even there he could feel the heat coming off him. Edgar reached for his face, looking away from Scriabin as he touched the angry red marks. He winced minutely, then glanced back at Scriabin, searching him, his expression guarded again. Scriabin could hear his own pulse in his ears.
"...Johnny?"
"Fuck." Fuck! "Of course you'd remember him but not me." God damn it! It wasn't right, it wasn't fair, just because Johnny came first by a hair's breadth, just because he wasn't in Edgar's head, with Edgar's fucked up little obsession with the murderous stick figure- It limited what he could get away with too, if he remembered that far back. Absolutely nothing was going in his favour.
"I'm sorry..." He sounded genuinely remorseful, and it stuck in his throat. Disgusting. "So you know Johnny, too."
"Unfortunately." Scriabin tucked his chin to his chest, arms crossed again in close proximity. This sucks. Edgar just kept rambling, unaware as ever. His excuses held this time at least, one point in his favour, no points for bringing his annoying habits with him despite everything.
"I don't think I've seen him for a couple months now? Everything's awfully..." He gave a vague gesture and Scriabin uncurled slightly. He was giving him room to contribute. He shook his head.
"You haven't."
"Have you?"
He returned to his tight coil of sulking. Not like he was keen to meet up and chat, but he couldn't explain why he hadn't had the opportunity to either.
"I remember he called, too."
"Ugh," barely above breath. Enough about Johnny! Again, Edgar continued obliviously.
"Although I don't really recall what we talked about, not for a while..."
Of course not. I took over for half of those.
He perked a bit, and Edgar focused more on him, patiently setting his hands in his lap.
"You know."
He could play this to his advantage. Give Johnny some well-deserved karmic justice for fucking him over so many times. It was almost better that Edgar didn't know - Scriabin had been trying to get him away from Johnny all this time, and if he really had forgotten everything, not just the moments when Scriabin took over but every moment they had shared, then that meant it coincided almost perfectly with his first meeting with Johnny. Blank spot after blank spot after blank spot, all lined up immediately after getting his face slashed.
He could work with that.
"It's probably trauma." Edgar startled and his hand shot to his temple, lightly touching his hair.
"Like, head trauma?" Scriabing almost laughed. Yeah, probably that too. But that wouldn't help his case.
"No." He leaned in, taking a more intimate, secretive tone. "Think about it. When did things start getting fuzzy?" If he was right on this - which of course he was, but not being able to verify, not being able to see that he was right, it was disconcerting - but if he was, Edgar's memories of Scriabin should start with that first fateful encounter, give or take. A bit of reframing here, a touch of implication there... It probably wasn't even an outright lie; if Edgar's memory were perfect after experiencing everything Johnny had put them through, that would be some kind of twisted miracle.
His only real concern was their "childhood" - how much had Scriabin pulled with him? Would that throw off his story? But that was so far back, there was no way Scriabin or Johnny could be implicated in that. As long as Edgar didn't bring it up before he thought his way around it...
Edgar stayed quiet for a long while. His eyes raced behind closed eyelids, searching, scanning, retracing - Scriabin could almost see the moments where he hesitated, stopped and went back, then starting recollecting again. He wished he could see it for real, watch him unfold himself, touch those memories again, hold up his own in contrast. Even just hear Edgar's thoughts as they went by, feel the emotions he felt. But he couldn't, so he just stared as unblinkingly as this new body would allow, just watched as Edgar went over everything on his own.
He finally opened his eyes, staring back into Scriabin's though he was sure they were still hidden. He felt naked and awkward and Edgar still hadn't said anything. If he could just see like he was supposed to, or if Edgar would just tell him, he wouldn't have to ask. I have to do everything around here.
"It was after you met him, wasn't it?"
"You think it's...mental trauma?" An unspoken 'yes.' Relief flooded him, and he pushed ahead.
"Edgar. He stabbed you." Edgar gripped his shoulder, his eyes closing again and he looked to be in pain. That was a very effective reminder at least. "Do you even know why?" He shook his head and spoke throught half-grit teeth.
"I must have made him mad, but I don't remember-" Of course not, I did that.
"Your mind is trying to protect you." Not. But one of us has to with your inexhaustable deathwish. Scriabin reached out to touch him properly, but Edgar pulled away. He didn't follow, still not yet. Play up the pity. "He messed you up so bad," with a curl in his tone, an I told you so that barely made it to words even privately; how long had he been holding that in? "Surely you must've felt like you wanted, you needed to get away from him, that he wasn't good for you, that you-" He'd told him so many times, some it must have stuck, some of it had to have-
"Then-!" Edgar's eyes shot open, wide and desperate with an edge of disbelief. A strangled gasp escaped him, half-choking him as he tried to speak. "Then why can't I remember you?!"
He almost began rolling off the cuff, but really, he still didn't know for sure. And it definitely wasn't like he could tell the truth even if he wanted to; who, who hadn't lived it, would believe him? Edgar certainly wouldn't, not with his lack of imagination. He had to dress this up, weave a narrative that was plausible, had the perfect mix of truth and falsehood to stand up to scrutiny.
Huh. Ironic.
"I..." No. Some of this was Edgar's fault too. "We...argued."
"Argued?"
"I... Mng." He wanted to aim for some kind of levity, but his throat had tightened on him. He just wanted to tell this stupid inside joke and not have it affect him, not have it mean anything, and here he was getting emotional? He'd say it and fucking mean it. "It's not like I'm in your head, so-" spat out in a rush, there, he'd said it. Haha, isn't that so funny. He swallowed harshly, pushing down everything he felt into his stomach acid. He was in control. He was fine. This didn't shake him. "I can't know for sure," another humourless laugh inside, "but I was against your relationship with Johnny. Maybe you shut me out so you could keep seeing him with no pushback."
It certainly wasn't outside the realm of possibilities of what Edgar would do to avoid taking Scriabin's extremely basic advice about fraternizing with serial killers. How many times had he been ignored up to this point, only to culminate in the ultimate 'I don't know what you're talking about.' Pfeh. I bet he wishes he'd thought of this sooner. It did nothing for his painfully stuttered pulse.
"You know, I've been trying to convince you to stop going back to him for a while, but, well..." He waved his hand at Edgar's hand still death gripped into his shoulder, and Edgar averted his eyes guiltily. At least he showed some remorse. Better than his nigh constant apologia.
He stayed quiet a moment longer, and just before Scriabin made to fill the silence again, Edgar struck him with an intense look.
"What are you to me?" Ugh. Of course. There was not a single good answer for that. Even if he told him everything- no, especially if he told him everything, there was no way Edgar would believe him. But coming up with a convincing lie on the spot, when they were so clearly something to each other - even he needed time to come up with something workable. How could he have ever prepared for a situation like this? It was never meant to happen, so many things were never meant to happen!
He continued at Scriabin's silence. "You know Nny," Ugh! Even his awful nickname. "And Todd. And...me." He couldn't refute it, so he nodded tightly. "Do you live here?"
Technically he had, and technically he hadn't. Still, going forward, it would be easier to let Edgar assume that he did. It wasn't like he had anywhere else to go at the moment anyway.
"Yes."
"Are we..." He searched him, looked him over as much as he could and he wasn't subtle about it. If only Scriabin had his proper glasses, he'd let him look as much he wanted, behold his spectacle! As it was, he just felt self-conscious and it was very unbefitting. "...family?"
The baggage on that. He did not feel like opening that particular can of worms in either of their current states. He turned his head and flipped through any number of halfway decent ways to phrase it until he hit on something Edgar would remember. Better not to contradict for now.
"You told Johnny you have no family when you met."
"That's true..." Edgar blinked, processing. "Wait, did I tell you that?" Scriabin startled. Even after he'd accounted for his memory! Of course he had to pick his story apart now, he never knew when to leave well enough alone.
"When you-" No, he had to be involved. "When we bandaged your face."
Edgar mulled on that for a few seconds, taking on a thoughtful pose. "I only remember being alone."
"You don't remember me at all. What do you want from me?" He huffed.
"No, sorry, you're right."
"Thank you." He was right!
Where had Edgar expected him to be? There was something weird about how he'd said it. He filed the thought away for later.
"So, if you've been living here, where..." Edgar looked around the room, then back to Scriabin. "Where have you been sleeping? Todd's already on the couch..."
Scriabin couldn't help as a smile sprung to his face. If he was going to present him with such a perfect opportunity, well, he'd better take it. He even had the decency to look nervous in response! This was too good.
"Would you believe me if I said right here, in bed?" He again tucked his chin, playfully this time, his hair falling further in his eyes. Even through the dark tangles he could make out Edgar's face immediately bristling with heat.
Ooh. That's such a fetching shade on you, my dear.
"But-! I, I haven't been sleeping on the floor!" He was visibly sweating!
"Correct." His smile grew. This was too easy, and he needed an easy win right about now.
"W-" He leaned forward on his legs, though refused to get any closer. When he spoke it was a harsh whisper. "Why...?"
Scriabin shrugged easily, not bothering to reign in his smile in the least. "I mean, where else, right?" He leaned in since Edgar refused to, and oh. He was blushing all the way up to his scalp. Hilarious. "You certainly didn't seem to mind." He couldn't hold back the slightly musical tone or his eyebrows inclination to move on their own. His body knew what he was getting at, and he could see it only increased Edgar's fluster. All the better.
"Well I do now!" Edgar darted up and away, stumbling in his hasty retreat. "If you'll excuse me!" though he was already practically in the hallway by the time he said it. What a display, and Scriabin's laugh was loud and natural.
Finally, something positive. He'd managed to fumble his way through, not his best work in lying or manipulation, but he'd set some important groundwork. He'd gotten some answers, and he could start to shape some more believable stories around them.
The biggest hurdles were Johnny and Devi. As long as Edgar didn't meet with them too soon - or well, at all would be preferable, but he doubted he could just keep him locked up, as much as the idea appealed to him. There were so many things that were possible now, things that he had the ability to do, given the right circumstances... All of that in due time. For now he had a yarn to spin.
He listened as Edgar fumbled in the hall, the sheer sound of cloth being pulled and folded over an arm barely perceptable. Was he really going to try to sleep on what little was left over? Maybe he'd give up once he realized the pickings were thin and beg Scriabin to let him sleep with him. Hah.
While he was out, Scriabin made his way over to the pajamas drawer. They were all old and soft, even just to his hand. They'd do for now, until he could get his own. It wasn't like he hadn't worn all this before anyway.
By the time he'd finished dressing, his clothes discarded on the opposite side of the bed to where Edgar had set up his little nest, Edgar had finally gotten himself a set of pajamas. He wondered for a moment if he'd dress with Scriabin in the room again, though maybe his intense stare drove him off. Who could say. He patted the bed with a wide grin when he returned and was dutifully ignored. He settled down to the side, and Scriabin laid on his arms to look down at him.
"Ugh, lame."
"I don't-"
"Yeah, whatever." He'd heard it all before. At least he could literally look down on him like this. He folded his hands and leaned just a bit further, looking him over. A desire he hadn't realized he had surfaced in the dark and quiet. "Give me your hand."
"Sorry?" Scriabin held out his hand expectantly.
"I used to hear your heart beat every day." Edgar looked at him incredulously, but Scriabin was unperturbed. "Let me hear it again."
He hesitated but eventually slowly offered his arm. "...Okay."
He pulled his arm up and placed his thumb against his wrist. He felt a strange mismatch - where he'd been expecting one heartbeat, there were two. He covered his surprise, near shock at the realization that of course he had his own body now, by pulling harder on Edgar's arm, directing him up to his ear.
"Wh-"
"Shh." Quietly. He had wanted this, wanted this body, this separation, this freedom for so long, and now... He spoke quietly, his voice betraying nothing. "I'm listening."
Edgar's pulse was erratic, but he hardly paid attention to it. His own fingers on Edgar's skin, warm and pliant, and Edgar's fingers twitching in his hair, he could feel it, he was trying not to touch him- This hesitation was killing him, every jerky movement away not from fear of what Scriabin could do to him, just uncertainty, like he was still a stranger- He pressed him harder to his head, and he could feel goosebumps under his fingers. He wanted to just hold him there until all the memories they'd shared poured back through him, into his blood, into his breath.
Where are you?
But he replied in that same uncertain, guarded tone that indicated he didn't know, not really.
"C...can I have my arm back now?"
He pushed him away. "Fine." Edgar curled his hand protectively against his chest, and he noticed he rubbed it slightly, he probably hadn't even realized.
He mumbled out a harried "Good night," and it was almost enough to make Scriabin smile. Almost. He could still affect him but this wasn't enough, it wasn't right.
He laid his head on the pillow, not bothering to pull his arm up over the side of the bed. If he twitched in the night and touched Edgar, well, that could mean anything. Maybe he was dreaming. Maybe he did it on purpose. Plausible deniability was one of his greatest assets.
As it was, he was just tired. Maybe he didn't pull it back because he hated the thought of sleeping alone, pushed out and forgotten, and hated it more that he was even thinking something like that. How pathetic. He didn't need anyone, especially not Edgar.
But he was tired. Not in his right mind.
Does this mean we can start over...?
The thought echoed and died, and he slept.
#💟#Fanfiction#Blank Slate AU#Edgar#Scriabin#Todd#Shmee#He's technically in there but once again no speaking lines :P Yet anyway lol#It's fanfic time again! I fell into yet another writing fugue and finished Chapters 1 and 2 in like four days lol#If you'll notice tho ♪ Neither of those chapters are featured under the cut :3c Pls do read Ch. 1 at least to get caught up before diving in#This one took a bit longer but that'd be because it's Almost as big as both previous chapters combined lol#I'll update it to the chapter list in a few days! Y'all get a preview here :D It'll be the same there with slightly different formatting#Decided to try something new since tumblr doesn't normally allow underlines but it's very important to Scriabin's syntax#I promise they're all just links to the first chapter lol - you're welcome to check but I promise I didn't put a sneaky link anywhere lol#My one gripe is that it doesn't look as good on-blog :/ Fine on the dash! But I'm not willing to sacrifice the dark colouration on the links#Italics were chosen as the only light feature for a reason ♪#I mean at least it's not Bolded lol I'll take it#These were a lot of fun to write so far ahhh <3 I've been wanting to dig a little deeper for a long while now!#I mentioned this idea offhandedly in the tags of Incoming Outgoing but ahhh it's very rewarding to put to words :D#Fun Fun Fun
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Messaging because I saw how on another post and it was hidden:
here's some instructions for anyone who doesn't know how to opt out:
login in on desktop, it's not available on mobile yet
click "Account"
click on your blog
go to "Blog Settings"
go to "Visibility"
Scroll down to the bottom option
turn the toggle ON, not off
i've been excusively desktop for years, i know where the setting is, i did not have it at the time
#tumblr has never once pushed an update to everyone at once#the people who can't find it when they can find every other setting aren't blind they don't HAVE it yet#i literally didn't get it until like 2? 3? days after Aye did#i don't even have the app lmao on my phone i still use mobile browser
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I wanna. Pick them up in my mouth and shake 'em around like a dog obliterating a squeaky toy
#you can tag anyone you feel this way about but I was thinking about Rook hunt in particular#tbh I feel like he'd picture the same - just with Vil and Neige#he wanta his oshis to be besties (he is just lime me fr) (just a liiiittle furyher frim reality)#(I view neigexVil as nore of a crackship until we get more Neige development/lore)#(our queen Vil doesn't deserve to be genuinely shipped with someone who's kinda 2D rn.#But I respect people who flesh out neige with headcanons - they write the dynamics realy well tbh)#(hopefully we get more RSA development at some point I think that'd be cool)#(plus I'd cry if TWST just. stopped. after the last NRC OB)#(I mean it'd make sense aince that's where the story is based and it'll probably end once Yuu finds a way home#- which feels close now thanks to Ortho)#(But at the same time I. have been following this since it first came out when I was about 16 - same age as the first year squad lol)#(and I feel like it'd feel weird if we stopped getting main story updates)#(Im rambling a LOT lol - probably because I'm tipsy haha)#(hope someone can relate to my lamenting of future woes though)#(Oh well - I should atop borrowing sorrow from the future and live joyfully with the now)#(I do miss my friends who've stopped being in the fandom though - and my friends who deactivated and idk how to contact now)#(sugarandmelody... zacrazyvalentine... I miss them. but we had fun#writing and stuff. and I suppose that's what matters in the end. that we had fun.)#at least - I hope they had fun too. and I kinda hope they think about me how I think of them sometimes.#have a nice day if you're reading this. I rambled in the tags a while and I understand that it's kinda long lol.#and probably riddled with typos#I'm tearing up for some reason haha. well it is what it is#I hope each and every one of my followers know how amazing they are - I hope y'all have a wonderful day - evening - or night#I wish I could hug people across the internet lol#I should stop posting on tumblr while drinky haha#tw drunk#tw drinking#i'll tag it just in case#don't wanna cause discomfort and stuff
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for better or for worse, i've been bitten by the fallout 76 bug 🫡
#i admit i was a fo76 hater for a longggg time because i'm a single player rpg girly first and foremost#but i got the game for free and decided to try it out and it's actually kind of fun even though it's such a departure from the other games#i think what i like best is that it's very cool in terms of lore and placement on the series timeline#lots of oc/fanfic/etc potential here tbh#and i like seeing the south in fallout as a southerner#i think i'm still burnt out on sims and tumblr btw lmfao#sorry i tried but i'm not feeling it rn#tumblr deleted the last couple posts in my story queue and i don't feel like redoing them or working on the next update#i was also on hiatus for so long that i feel out of place on here now even though there's no reason for me to feel that way#and i additionally feel bad because i'm so behind on reading other folks stories and legacies and i feel guilty in a way posting without#catching up first#*sigh* i'll come back to simblr fully at some point#once the inspo and motivation come back and the post-grad blegh ends#for now it's fallout games every day for me babyyyyy
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Every Tumblr user ever: I hate tiktok so much I wouldn't get near it with a ten meters pole
Tumblr every three days: Here's a brand new way we tiktokified your perfectly fine Tumblr this week
#Rant incoming feel free to ignore this#:(#Read the new @/changes update and I want to throw up.#What's going on seriously they were handling this website so well up to like a month ago.#What do you mean people who create an account after May 8th won't get a dashboard as default... Are you insane.#Did you hit your head or something#What is going on????????#“Some folks will start getting access to certain badges based on different actions/accomplishments” with all due respect. Kill me right now#What is this???????????????? This is even worse than all the recent stretching and highlighting on mutuals / followers.#I don't follow anyone leave me ALONE#Like seriously someone really needs to remember Staff that the best part of Tumblr is the low competitiveness–#that literally every other social lacks. They used to know back in the day???#And now it's all “Here's who follows you (((and by evident extension who doesn't)))”. Have you considered I DON'T WANT TO KNOW#Next update they'll hit you with a “follower count / likes / following is all public now btw 😊”#and that's going to be the day I'll disappear from the entire internet once and for all#Tbh I think I'm going to write some very polite but strong worded submission to staff or something.#I know chances are they won't even read it but things are so bad I don't want to leave anything untried#random rambles
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honestly whenever i go on persona twitter i see nothing but people hating and arguing and it's like. do yall even have fun... do yall even have an enjoyable time participating in fandom when that's how you act...
#squishy talks too much#the way people on twitter seem to like.#specifically log on there to argue#how is that fun that would give me stress illness if i woke up and did that every day#i come on tumblr to talk about persona to people who actually like my interpretations and ideas#i only go on twitter to look for p3re updates#once i find out the specific logistics of the next full moon trailer reveal i'll stop checking it lmao
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everything goes so slow for pietro i am 100% convinced he's incredibly terminally online to get his dopamine hits. he's so active on twitter people are worried about him. he keeps getting suspended bcuz he keeps sending people death threats and doxxing them and then has to call tony up so he can pay to get his accound back. he shows up in front of houses of people he beefs with. he fights with teenagers online all day. the official avengers twitter account has him blocked.
#tumblr user ill-say-this-fast (ily) said he'd esp get really into discourse concerning wanda and literally#he searches her name up and inserts himself into any conversation he finds#he's deranged#i said this on twitter circle some time ago but fanfic is real in the comics and so is superhero rpf#what i am trying to say is i am 100% convinced he looks up fanfics of himself jdhfghf#reading scarletsilver fic kicking his feet twirling his hair commenting 'quicksilver would not fucking say that' but bookmarking anyway. et#he keeps dropping social media lingo and wanda never has any clue what he's talking about so she just smiles and nods#she's so nice and thinks of him so highly so mostly she assumes it's words from poetry he's read but actually his brain is just rotted#he gets pissed bcuz a teenager online he was fighting with called him 'old' at least once a day#etc.#luna is social media age now (14 ish) but she's only on instagram where he's not this bad so she isn't confronted with it. luckily#lorna thinks his twitter activities are SO funny though#magneto isn't quite sure how to use a computer (< joking... mostly) so he's not on twitter#but lorna keeps him updated on their daily tea sessions bcuz she thinks it's hilarious. magneto is very tired#ok i need to stop. i just have a lot of thoughts about pietro twitter okay.#we got that one glimpse in damage control where he tagged them to complain about an employee sgzdugdh he's just like that all the time#txt
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was looking through every post on my blog i've tagged as #art, (i love you tumblr archive function!) trying to find a post I hadnt tagged with the TV show it was from. I was scrolling month by month and I had this really nice feeling of like. how lucky am i that I can see all these passionate people's art for free whenever i want. that they put all this time and effort into something because they love it. and i get to see it because of the internet. i love you tumblr artists i love you internet i love you people being genuinely passionate about something i love you
#also again. i love you tumblr archive function#i was looking for that one post that had the 3 protags from dtennant's across the world in 80 days cuddling on the beach#and i found it!#but i was just struck by how much cool art I'd reblogged since I started using a tagging system#updates from cipher#i have this convo with someone like once a month but if you just think about it. how lucky are we that the internet exists#that we get to use it and talk to people every day. we really live in the Future
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