#these two have a lot of ups and downs in their relationship but they're nuts about eachother i think

[angelbitezzz]

Well here it is! With fun cover art to boot :)

let me know what you think!

[catofadifferentcolor]

Terrible Fic Idea #92: Percy/Apollo, but make it The Trojan War

Into every fandom, a time travel fic must fall - or in this case a second one, because I somehow got to thinking about the delightful PJO trope of Percy being thrown back in time to The Trojan War and realized that doing so misses out on a fantastic opportunity.

Or: What if post-TOA Percy Jackson and Apollo time travel to shortly before The Trojan War?

aka the Tried To Change The Ending fic

Just imagine it:

Everything follows canon through TOA, with one exception: rather than struggle to catch up in the mortal world following the Second Gigantomachy, Percy elects to stay at Camp Half-Blood. There he can homeschool at his own place with programs tailored towards ADHD children and still visit his family on the weekends - and not get into any more ridiculous situations in the mortal world when one of the gods kidnaps him or sends him on a quest to find their sneakers.

This, naturally, stresses his relationship with Annabeth - who, now that she's no longer living at camp full time, calls it the easy way out. But Percy is tired and struggling in mortal high school where everyone thinks he's a delinquent idiot when another option exists seems foolish. Percy and Annabeth break up and drift apart.

Enter Apollo, fresh from his latest stint as a mortal. He's trying to do his best by his children, which includes popping by camp as often as he can get away with - which in turn means spending a lot of time with Percy, who at this point is unofficially running CHB because it's not like Dionysus or even Chiron have done a brilliant job of it in recent times.

(First aid, strategy, and mythology classes are made mandatory. Percy personally ensures every demigod knows enough about self-defense to be able to survive long enough to run away or for help to arrive. Bullying is cracked down on so hard that it's this, not Percy's generally parental nature, that has people calling him Camp Mom.)

Percy and Apollo become friendly. Enough so that some of Apollo's kids assume they're dating and keeping it on the down-low so as not to draw Zeus' ire. Or Poseidon's. Or anyone else's. It's on one of their not-dates that they're yeeted into the past, without warning or explanation.

And so 19-year-old Percy Jackson and post-TOA Apollo find themselves in Ancient Greece c. 1220 BCE, roughly thirty-five years before the destruction of Troy.

The time travel is immediately obvious, as Apollo becomes the closest thing a god might experience to being high the moment they land in the past - being a powerful god in modern times is nothing like being a powerful god at the height of his power in ancient times. It's overwhelming (and somewhat alarming from Percy's POV, but kind of funny in retrospect.)

The specific date is harder to determine, but made clear when Hermes shows up and starts going on about you'll never believe what father's done now: he seduced the Spartan queen as a swan and she's laid an egg. Hera is furious - especially as they're saying the girl that hatched from it is the most beautiful in the world, even though she's only a few days old. It's nuts. By the way, where have you been? You missed the last two council meetings. Do you want Dad to punish you?

Apollo at this stage is very high. He's also been USTing over Percy for quite some time and is worried what the gods of this era might do to Percy without divine protection (smiting or seduction, it's all on the table). But mostly he's very high, and so to keep Percy close and safe he declares he's been off having the dirtiest of dirty weekends with his latest lover and that Hermes' presence is ruining the mood. So if he would kindly leave, please and thank you, he'd really rather get back to it without an audience.

This, naturally, is a surprise to Percy, but he rolls with it because 1) he doesn't have any better ideas on how to get rid of Ancient Greek Hermes so they can figure out what the hades is going on and 2) he's been USTing over Apollo ever since he recovered enough from Tartarus to start feeling attraction again.

Fueled by mutual UST, they put together a cover story that should hold the next time a god with too much prurient interest shows: Percy is now Prince Persē of Gadir - a Phoenician colony that will grow into the future Cadiz - well past the edge of the Greek world at this stage but not beyond belief for Poseidon to have visited, as it's obvious who his father is. They claim his mother is the King of Gadir's youngest sister and as such Persē had a royal upbringing, but was far enough down the line of succession that he was free to chose to sail east and explore his father's homeland. Apollo caught sight of him on his journey, one thing led to another, and here they are.

(Are there easier, more sensible cover stories? Possibly. But the UST refuses to let them consider any of them now that a fake relationship is on the table.)

Deciding what to do about The Trojan War is much harder. On the one hand, it's a lot of senseless death and destruction. On the other, without it we don't get The Iliad and The Odyssey - two of the most influential works of literature in western civilization - and Aeneas doesn't go off to Italy (leading to the founding of Rome, which would change the history of western civilization a lot). In the end, they decide to let the war happen but do their best to mitigate the worst parts of it.

And so Percy goes off and becomes a hero of Ancient Greece while pretending to be in a relationship with Apollo.

This stage of things is filed with angst from both parties, as both Percy and Apollo want a real relationship with each other but think they're abusing the other's trust by eagerly faking their relationship. There's a lot of PDA, a lot of feelings, and limited communication. It goes on for quite a while and would probably exasperate quite a few people if everyone in the know didn't think they were already in a relationship.

It's also filled with modern day Percy being confronted by realties of life in Ancient Greece. It's not just mortals knowing about - and interacting with - the gods: it's everything. It's food and clothes and language and culture and housing and travel. He can play a lot off it as being a traveler from the edge of the known world, but some of it has him asking Apollo if he's being rick rolled.

Apollo, meanwhile, is having troubles of his own. He is not the god he used to be and it's hard pretending otherwise. He tries to walk the line of doing enough to be believable and holding back enough not to despise himself, but it's a fine line, he fails often, and he spends a not insignificant amount of time worried he's backsliding.

And so it goes until 7-year-old Helen of Troy is kidnapped by Theseus to be his wife.

This, naturally, does not fly with Percy, who by this time has built up something of a reputation as a hero. He teams up with the Dioscuri to rescue Helen.

One would think this would earn him Zeus' favor. It doesn't. Instead, Zeus sends monsters to harry him for refusing to let Castor and Pollux take Helen's captors' loved ones captive and raze Aphidna for Theseus' crime. Percy manages to hold his own for quite a while but eventually, exhausted from the near-constant fighting, is gored and left for dead by the reformed Minotaur.

...and when Apollo arrives, frantic, to heal him, Percy ascends instead, becoming the greek version of Saint Sebastian - a minor god of heroes, strength in the face of adversity, and athleticism; sort of halfway between Hercules and Chiron.

Then and only then do Percy and Apollo finally get their act together, confessing to each other how much they care for the other and how much they don't want this to be fake any longer.

History proceeds apace - albeit with Persē being a second immortal trainer of heroes.

24 years after their arrival in the past, 16 years after Percy's ascension, The Trojan War begins. Despite their best efforts, there's only so much they can do - war is war and gods are gods. They are able to stop some of the worst excesses on both sides, but in the end Apollo still sends the plague that causes Agamemnon to take Briseis for his own, which caused Achilles' departure from the field, Patroclus' death, &c - not because Apollo was trying to maintain the timeline, but because in the instant he sent it he was angry and reverted to his old ways.

Troy falls...

...but when Zeus tries to use this as an excuse to ban gods from interacting with their demigod children, Apollo is able to say that's a bit extreme isn't it? with enough backing from the rest of the council that Zeus is forced to amend his ruling so that the gods are only allowed to freely visit their children on the "cross quarter days" that fall between each solstice and equinox (1 February, 1 May, 1 August, and 1 November).

This changes everything and nothing.

Time continues its inevitable march. Greece has its golden age before being conquered by Rome, which splits apart under its own weight and forms several smaller countries, which eventually spread their cultures around the world...

Apollo and Percy are there for it all. Persē is a minor figure in mythology, but never forgotten. He is ever-present in Apollo's temples - though the Church will later try to rewrite their myth so that they were merely sworn fighting partners, rather than lovers who eventually had a quite lovely wedding on Olympus (and then, at Poseidon's insistence, an even bigger ceremony on Atlantis). Percy takes over day-to-day operations of CHB from practically the moment the Trojan War ends.

...and so Persē is there the day Sally Jackson tries to get her son to camp, and is able to intervene when the Minotaur attacks on their border. He's able to meet her and her young son, Perseus ("Mom named me after you and the guy that killed Medusa since you're the only two heroes to have happy endings!"), and guide him through the trials that come with being a child of prophecy.

One day that Percy will hand Luke - who was never happy with the limited attention the gods were allowed to give their children - a cursed dagger so that Kronos can be defeated. That child will be offered godhood, turn it down, and go on to have a happy life with his eventual wife, Annabeth. He will never have his memories erased and be sent to Camp Jupiter. Gaia will not rise until long after that Percy's grandchildren are dead, and Zeus will not be quite so bullheaded when the proof of it is brought before him. That Second Gigantomachy is swift, well-coordinated, and fought without another Greek/Roman war brewing in the background.

And when they finally arrive at the day Apollo and Percy were originally sent back in time, Percy admits that while he is happy some version of him was better prepared for the war he was asked to fight in and allowed his peace afterward, he would change nothing about his own life, for it brought him to Apollo. The sunrise the next morning - on the first morning of the rest of their lives - is particularly spectacular.

Bonuses include:

Gaslighting Poseidon into believing that he's met Percy before the first time they're introduced. ("What do you mean you don't remember me, Father? You were present when I came of age! You gifted me this trident! Have I displeased you in some way?") It's an absolute masterclass that eventually manages to convince Poseidon that, yes, of course he knows Percy - and, maybe, he should check in on all his other demigod children to make sure he's not missed someone. (Two. He lost track of two of the others. Maybe he should be more careful about siring children in the future.) Apollo practically has to stuff his fist in his mouth to keep from laughing.

As much historical accuracy as can be crammed into the Percy trying to make sense of Ancient Greece chapters as possible. Think Of a Linear Circle - Part III by flamethrower levels of historical research. As much as can be shoehorned in without bogging down the plot.

Percy and Dionysus bonding over their mutual dislike of Theseus, though Percy generally gets along with his other half-siblings, especially the ones who come to camp young enough to keep from getting big heads over being the children of Poseidon.

Though Percy adores all the children in Cabin 7 (most of whom are born via blessing this time around), he and Apollo have at least one child of their own - maybe a demigod born before Percy's ascension to sell their fake relationship? Maybe a minor god who's later attributed a different parentage by mortals? Dealer's choice on details.

It never being made clear who, or what, or how, Percy and Apollo were sent into the past. All of Percy's oddities are attributed to him being foreign or formerly mortal, all of Apollo's to the fact that he's in love with someone who didn't die before their first anniversary, and no one ever guesses time travel is responsible for their eccentricities. Or that time travel was ever an option.

And that's all I have. As always, feel free to adopt, just link back if you ever decide to do anything with it.

More PJO Ideas | More Terrible Fic Ideas

[eyrieofsynapses]

why Aurora's art is genius

It's break for me, and I've been meaning to sit down and read the Aurora webcomic (https://comicaurora.com/, @comicaurora on Tumblr) for quite a bit. So I did that over the last few days.

And… y'know. I can't actually say "I should've read this earlier," because otherwise I would've been up at 2:30-3am when I had responsibilities in the morning and I couldn't have properly enjoyed it, but. Holy shit guys THIS COMIC.

I intended to just do a generalized "hello this is all the things I love about this story," and I wrote a paragraph or two about art style. …and then another. And another. And I realized I needed to actually reference things so I would stop being too vague. I was reading the comic on my tablet or phone, because I wanted to stay curled up in my chair, but I type at a big monitor and so I saw more details… aaaaaand it turned into its own giant-ass post.

SO. Enjoy a few thousand words of me nerding out about this insanely cool art style and how fucking gorgeous this comic is? (There are screenshots, I promise it isn't just a wall of text.) In my defense, I just spent two semesters in graphic design classes focusing on the Adobe Suite, so… I get to be a nerd about pretty things…???

All positive feedback btw! No downers here. <3

---

I cannot emphasize enough how much I love the beautiful, simple stylistic method of drawing characters and figures. It is absolutely stunning and effortless and utterly graceful—it is so hard to capture the sheer beauty and fluidity of the human form in such a fashion. Even a simple outline of a character feels dynamic! It's gorgeous!

Though I do have a love-hate relationship with this, because my artistic side looks at that lovely simplicity, goes "I CAN DO THAT!" and then I sit down and go to the paper and realize that no, in fact, I cannot do that yet, because that simplicity is born of a hell of a lot of practice and understanding of bodies and actually is really hard to do. It's a very developed style that only looks simple because the artist knows what they're doing. The human body is hard to pull off, and this comic does so beautifully and makes it look effortless.

Also: line weight line weight line weight. It's especially important in simplified shapes and figures like this, and hoo boy is it used excellently. It's especially apparent the newer the pages get—I love watching that improvement over time—but with simpler figures and lines, you get nice light lines to emphasize both smaller details, like in the draping of clothing and the curls of hair—which, hello, yes—and thicker lines to emphasize bigger and more important details and silhouettes. It's the sort of thing that's essential to most illustrations, but I wanted to make a note of it because it's so vital to this art style.

THE USE OF LAYER BLENDING MODES OH MY GODS. (...uhhh, apologies to the people who don't know what that means, it's a digital art program thing? This article explains it for beginners.)

Bear with me, I just finished my second Photoshop course, I spent months and months working on projects with this shit so I see the genius use of Screen and/or its siblings (of which there are many—if I say "Screen" here, assume I mean the entire umbrella of Screen blending modes and possibly Overlay) and go nuts, but seriously it's so clever and also fucking gorgeous:

Firstly: the use of screened-on sound effect words over an action? A "CRACK" written over a branch and then put on Screen in glowy green so that it's subtle enough that it doesn't disrupt the visual flow, but still sticks out enough to make itself heard? Little "scritches" that are transparent where they're laid on without outlines to emphasize the sound without disrupting the underlying image? FUCK YES. I haven't seen this done literally anywhere else—granted, I haven't read a massive amount of comics, but I've read enough—and it is so clever and I adore it. Examples:

Secondly: The beautiful lighting effects. The curling leaves, all the magic, the various glowing eyes, the fog, the way it's all so vividly colored but doesn't burn your eyeballs out—a balance that's way harder to achieve than you'd think—and the soft glows around them, eeeee it's so pretty so pretty SO PRETTY. Not sure if some of these are Outer/Inner Glow/Shadow layer effects or if it's entirely hand-drawn, but major kudos either way; I can see the beautiful use of blending modes and I SALUTE YOUR GENIUS.

I keep looking at some of this stuff and go "is that a layer effect or is it done by hand?" Because you can make some similar things with the Satin layer effect in Photoshop (I don't know if other programs have this? I'm gonna have to find out since I won't have access to PS for much longer ;-;) that resembles some of the swirly inner bits on some of the lit effects, but I'm not sure if it is that or not. Or you could mask over textures? There's... many ways to do it.

If done by hand: oh my gods the patience, how. If done with layer effects: really clever work that knows how to stop said effects from looking wonky, because ugh those things get temperamental. If done with a layer of texture that's been masked over: very, very good masking work. No matter the method, pretty shimmers and swirly bits inside the bigger pretty swirls!

Next: The way color contrast is used! I will never be over the glowy green-on-black Primordial Life vibes when Alinua gets dropped into that… unconscious space?? with Life, for example, and the sharp contrast of vines and crack and branches and leaves against pitch black is just visually stunning. The way the roots sink into the ground and the three-dimensional sensation of it is particularly badass here:

Friggin. How does this imply depth like that. HOW. IT'S SO FREAKING COOL.

A huge point here is also color language and use! Everybody has their own particular shade, generally matching their eyes, magic, and personality, and I adore how this is used to make it clear who's talking or who's doing an action. That was especially apparent to me with Dainix and Falst in the caves—their colors are both fairly warm, but quite distinct, and I love how this clarifies who's doing what in panels with a lot of action from both of them. There is a particular bit that stuck out to me, so I dug up the panels (see this page and the following one https://comicaurora.com/aurora/1-20-30/):

(Gods it looks even prettier now that I put it against a plain background. Also, appreciation to Falst for managing a bridal-carry midair, damn.)

The way that their colors MERGE here! And the immense attention to detail in doing so—Dainix is higher up than Falst is in the first panel, so Dainix's orange fades into Falst's orange at the base. The next panel has gold up top and orange on bottom; we can't really tell in that panel where each of them are, but that's carried over to the next panel—

—where we now see that Falst's position is raised above Dainix's due to the way he's carrying him. (Points for continuity!) And, of course, we see the little "huffs" flowing from orange to yellow over their heads (where Dainix's head is higher than Falst's) to merge the sound of their breathing, which is absurdly clever because it emphasizes to the viewer how we hear two sets of huffing overlaying each other, not one. Absolutely brilliant.

(A few other notes of appreciation to that panel: beautiful glows around them, the sparks, the jagged silhouette of the spider legs, the lovely colors that have no right to make the area around a spider corpse that pretty, the excellent texturing on the cave walls plus perspective, the way Falst's movements imply Dainix's hefty weight, the natural posing of the characters, their on-point expressions that convey exactly how fuckin terrifying everything is right now, the slight glows to their eyes, and also they're just handsome boys <3)

Next up: Rain!!!! So well done! It's subtle enough that it never ever disrupts the impact of the focal point, but evident enough you can tell! And more importantly: THE MIST OFF THE CHARACTERS. Rain does this irl, it has that little vapor that comes off you and makes that little misty effect that plays with lighting, it's so cool-looking and here it's used to such pretty effect!

One of the panel captions says something about it blurring out all the injuries on the characters but like THAT AIN'T TOO BIG OF A PROBLEM when it gets across the environmental vibes, and also that'd be how it would look in real life too so like… outside viewer's angle is the same as the characters', mostly? my point is: that's the environment!!! that's the vibes, that's the feel! It gets it across and it does so in the most pretty way possible!

And another thing re: rain, the use of it to establish perspective, particularly in panels like this—

—where we can tell we're looking down at Tynan due to the perspective on the rain and where it's pointing. Excellent. (Also, kudos for looking down and emphasizing how Tynan's losing his advantage—lovely use of visual storytelling.)

Additionally, the misting here:

We see it most heavily in the leftmost panel, where it's quite foggy as you would expect in a rainstorm, especially in an environment with a lot of heat, but it's also lightly powdered on in the following two panels and tends to follow light sources, which makes complete sense given how light bounces off particles in the air.

A major point of strength in these too is a thorough understanding of lighting, like rim lighting, the various hues and shades, and an intricate understanding of how light bounces off surfaces even when they're in shadow (we'll see a faint glow in spots where characters are half in shadow, but that's how it would work in real life, because of how light bounces around).

Bringing some of these points together: the fluidity of the lines in magic, and the way simple glowing lines are used to emphasize motion and the magic itself, is deeply clever. I'm basically pulling at random from panels and there's definitely even better examples, but here's one (see this page https://comicaurora.com/aurora/1-16-33/):

First panel, listed in numbers because these build on each other:

The tension of the lines in Tess's magic here. This works on a couple levels: first, the way she's holding her fists, as if she's pulling a rope taut.

The way there's one primary line, emphasizing the rope feeling, accompanied by smaller ones.

The additional lines starbursting around her hands, to indicate the energy crackling in her hands and how she's doing a good bit more than just holding it. (That combined with the fists suggests some tension to the magic, too.) Also the variations in brightness, a feature you'll find in actual lightning. :D Additional kudos for how the lightning sparks and breaks off the metal of the sword.

A handful of miscellaneous notes on the second panel:

The reflection of the flames in Erin's typically dark blue eyes (which bears a remarkable resemblance to Dainix, incidentally—almost a thematic sort of parallel given Erin's using the same magic Dainix specializes in?)

The flowing of fabric in the wind and associated variation in the lineart

The way Erin's tattoos interact with the fire he's pulling to his hand

The way the rain overlays some of the fainter areas of fire (attention! to! detail! hell yeah!)

I could go on. I won't because this is a lot of writing already.

Third panel gets paragraphs, not bullets:

Erin's giant-ass "FWOOM" of fire there, and the way the outline of the word is puffy-edged and gradated to feel almost three-dimensional, plus once again using Screen or a variation on it so that the stars show up in the background. All this against that stunning plume of fire, which ripples and sparks so gorgeously, and the ending "om" of the onomatopoeia is emphasized incredibly brightly against that, adding to the punch of it and making the plume feel even brighter.

Also, once again, rain helping establish perspective, especially in how it's very angular in the left side of the panel and then slowly becomes more like a point to the right to indicate it's falling directly down on the viewer. Add in the bright, beautiful glow effects, fainter but no less important black lines beneath them to emphasize the sky and smoke and the like, and the stunningly beautiful lighting and gradated glows surrounding Erin plus the lightning jagging up at him from below, and you get one hell of an impactful panel right there. (And there is definitely more in there I could break down, this is just a lot already.)

And in general: The colors in this? Incredible. The blues and purples and oranges and golds compliment so well, and it's all so rich.

Like, seriously, just throughout the whole comic, the use of gradients, blending modes, color balance and hues, all the things, all the things, it makes for the most beautiful effects and glows and such a rich environment. There's a very distinct style to this comic in its simplified backgrounds (which I recognize are done partly because it's way easier and also backgrounds are so time-consuming dear gods but lemme say this) and vivid, smoothly drawn characters; the simplicity lets them come to the front and gives room for those beautiful, richly saturated focal points, letting the stylized designs of the magic and characters shine. The use of distinct silhouettes is insanely good. Honestly, complex backgrounds might run the risk of making everything too visually busy in this case. It's just, augh, so GORGEOUS.

Another bit, take a look at this page (https://comicaurora.com/aurora/1-15-28/):

It's not quite as evident here as it is in the next page, but this one does some other fun things so I'm grabbing it. Points:

Once again, using different colors to represent different character actions. The "WHAM" of Kendal hitting the ground is caused by Dainix's force, so it's orange (and kudos for doubling the word over to add a shake effect). But we see blue layered underneath, which could be an environmental choice, but might also be because it's Kendal, whose color is blue.

And speaking off, take a look at the right-most panel on top, where Kendal grabs the spear: his motion is, again, illustrated in bright blue, versus the atmospheric screened-on orange lines that point toward him around the whole panel (I'm sure these have a name, I think they might be more of a manga thing though and the only experience I have in manga is reading a bit of Fullmetal Alchemist). Those lines emphasize the weight of the spear being shoved at him, and their color tells us Dainix is responsible for it.

One of my all-time favorite effects in this comic is the way cracks manifest across Dainix's body to represent when he starts to lose control; it is utterly gorgeous and wonderfully thematic. These are more evident in the page before and after this one, but you get a decent idea here. I love the way they glow softly, the way the fire juuuust flickers through at the start and then becomes more evident over time, and the cracks feel so realistic, like his skin is made of pottery. Additional points for how fire begins to creep into his hair.

A small detail that's generally consistent across the comic, but which I want to make note of here because you can see it pretty well: Kendal's eyes glow about the same as the jewel in his sword, mirroring his connection to said sword and calling back to how the jewel became Vash's eye temporarily and thus was once Kendal's eye. You can always see this connection (though there might be some spots where this also changes in a symbolic manner; I went through it quickly on the first time around, so I'll pay more attention when I inevitably reread this), where Kendal's always got that little shine of blue in his eyes the same as the jewel. It's a beautiful visual parallel that encourages the reader to subconsciously link them together, especially since the lines used to illustrate character movements typically mirror their eye color. It's an extension of Kendal.

Did I mention how ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL the colors in this are?

Also, the mythological/legend-type scenes are illustrated in familiar style often used for that type of story, a simple and heavily symbolic two-dimensional cave-painting-like look. They are absolutely beautiful on many levels, employing simple, lovely gradients, slightly rougher and thicker lineart that is nonetheless smoothly beautiful, and working with clear silhouettes (a major strength of this art style, but also a strength in the comic overall). But in particular, I wanted to call attention to a particular thing (see this page https://comicaurora.com/aurora/1-12-4/):

The flowing symbolic lineart surrounding each character. This is actually quite consistent across characters—see also Life's typical lines and how they curl:

What's particularly interesting here is how these symbols are often similar, but not the same. Vash's lines are always smooth, clean curls, often playing off each other and echoing one another like ripples in a pond. You'd think they'd look too similar to Life's—but they don't. Life's curl like vines, and they remain connected; where one curve might echo another but exist entirely detached from each other in Vash's, Life's lines still remain wound together, because vines are continuous and don't float around. :P

Tahraim's are less continuous, often breaking up with significantly smaller bits and pieces floating around like—of course—sparks, and come to sharper points. These are also constants: we see the vines repeated over and over in Alinua's dreams of Life, and the echoing ripples of Vash are consistent wherever we encounter him. Kendal's dream of the ghost citizens of the city of Vash in the last few chapters is filled with these rippling, echoing patterns, to beautiful effect (https://comicaurora.com/aurora/1-20-14/):

They ripple and spiral, often in long, sinuous curves, with smooth elegance. It reminds me a great deal of images of space and sine waves and the like. This establishes a definite feel to these different characters and their magic. And the thing is, that's not something that had to be done—the colors are good at emphasizing who's who. But it was done, and it adds a whole other dimension to the story. Whenever you're in a deity's domain, you know whose it is no matter the color.

Regarding that shape language, I wanted to make another note, too—Vash is sometimes described as chaotic and doing what he likes, which is interesting to me, because smooth, elegant curves and the color blue aren't generally associated with chaos. So while Vash might behave like that on the surface, I'm guessing he's got a lot more going on underneath; he's probably much more intentional in his actions than you'd think at a glance, and he is certainly quite caring with his city. The other thing is that this suits Kendal perfectly. He's a paragon character; he is kind, virtuous, and self-sacrificing, and often we see him aiming to calm others and keep them safe. Blue is such a good color for him. There is… probably more to this, but I'm not deep enough in yet to say.

And here's the thing: I'm only scratching the surface. There is so much more here I'm not covering (color palettes! outfits! character design! environment! the deities! so much more!) and a lot more I can't cover, because I don't have the experience; this is me as a hobbyist artist who happened to take a couple design classes because I wanted to. The art style to this comic is so clever and creative and beautiful, though, I just had to go off about it. <3

...brownie points for getting all the way down here? Have a cookie.

[radioapplerevue]

Radioapple Fic Recs #2

I'm finally getting around to updating my fic recs, and I decided that it would get a bit too unwieldy to just keep adding on to the original post. So, from now on I'll be putting them into different parts and then linking them in an archive post, which I will pin on my blog. For now, my first post of recs can be found here.

There are also a bunch of unfinished fics that I have been keeping an eye on that I haven't read yet because they are fairly early on and their tags say something along the lines of "it gets worse before it gets better" haha. There are enough fics grinding my heart into dust at the moment, but just know that I am seeing those chapter counts go up. I'm Watching You.

Now, onto the recs!

Home Stretch by @tarmairons (mature)

Welcome to the most convoluted game of 20 questions I've ever seen. I love the slow, purposeful approach to showing how Lucifer and Alastor's relationship is shifting and merging to not only accommodate each other, but also tie them closer together. This is an entire fic of them attempting to communicate and really, honestly trying even if neither of them are sure of what the hell they're doing. And, of course, I love when fics really take the time to explore how Alastor's asexuality (and lack of experience with intimacy in general) would affect his approach and behavior when it comes to sex with Lucifer -- and also how Lucifer learns to handle Alastor in a way that meets his needs, even if the things Alastor needs are not what Lucifer's used to.

2. To Be The Perfect Angel, Some Sin Must Be Done by @hismercytomyjustice (ratings vary by part)

This is a series I've really super been enjoying, largely because it's just fun. Don't get me wrong, the explicit parts are hot too, but it's fucking funny and there's just such an enjoyable push and pull dynamic between Alastor and Lucifer here, where each give as good as they get and actually end up... maybe.... enjoying it? Whoops? And oh shit here comes feelings, where did those come from. And as always, I enjoy seeing how Alastor's asexuality is handled here, with his discomfort with making decisions or taking the lead in bed causing them to develop a dynamic where Lucifer makes all the calls, and Alastor makes the terrifying choice to trust him with his own body, pleasure, and safety. Plus, excellent use of the shadow here. Having the shadow play a significant role in a fic is always one of my favorite things, and I am also very here for shadow fucking at all times.

3. somewhere down the line by kj_crwn (explicit)

This is one of the "Alastor and Lucifer meet in the living world first" fics. I love Lucifer basically just coming up to the living world to be the biggest nuisance to Alastor he could possibly be, but whoops, I guess Alastor's into that. There's a lot of murder, a lot of two assholes trying to drive each other nuts (and succeeding), a lot of sexual tension, and a lot of said assholes being really, really bad at feelings. I particularly enjoy what happens from the time of Alastor's death up to the conclusion of the fic, and the way they have to come to grips with what their relationship is now, what it could be, and what they want it to be.

4. T is for Tax Evasion by @radiaurapple (teen and up)

This is a brand new fic, but my goodness I loved it immediately. I loved the take on Heaven's fucked up bureaucracy, I loved Lucifer's panic, guilt and weariness, and I love how God is a fucking dick. It's such an interesting concept that is explored through Lucifer's slowly crumbling psyche as the knowledge he's going to lose Alastor becomes more and more certain. Or is it? There are few things I love more than pre-emptive grief and utter desperation, and the emotional payoff is just so good. I would have loved to have seen more of the fallout, but regardless, this is one that I'll definitely be thinking about for a while.

5. I Will Dance Divine by @rahabs (mature)

This fic caught my attention immediately. A large part of is exploring Alastor and Lucifer's relationship through dance, and the first chapter is immediately gripping. There's such an immediate magnetism to them, as well as the clash between the performance they are putting on and the quiet battle they are having with each other. It made me so look forward to seeing where it goes. So far it seems to be a slow, but very thorough burn, with the fic taking its time to really let them come together naturally, and learn about each other in tantalizing pieces. I dearly hope it is continued as I want to see more, but what there is already is also a wonderful read.

6. Muzzle for My Lover by sabbathgoat (explicit)

This is a smutty one-shot, but it has one of my favorite depictions of a sexual dynamic between Alastor and Lucifer in anything. There's such a deep undercurrent of trust here, a trust that has been hard-earned over years. Lucifer's handling of Alastor, knowledge of his fluctuating boundaries and internal battles when it comes to his own body and desires, combined with his intense love and tenderness towards him just bleeds through the entire fic. I would happily read a several chapter story with them just lying there cuddling and doing nothing else if it was written with this same weight. It's one of those cases where you don't need to be told how in love they are, because it's impossible to not feel it.

7. Stolen Moments by @mothballmilkshake (ratings vary by part)

This series is quite the rollercoaster! Alastor and Lucifer's relationship in it hits some great highs and also some serious lows, because they are both so so bad at this oh my god. I like that it's from Alastor's POV, because I feel like we don't get that very often, particularly in the longer fics. And I also like that it just shows us what an absolute fucking disaster he is, haha. The continuing plot line regarding Alastor's deal is interesting and groundwork is being laid for some serious shit to go down later on. We'll have to see if Lucifer and Alastor's foundation has been built strong enough by then to not crumble under the pressure. But hey, after all they've gone through, I believe in them (.....mostly).

8. Hope Against Hope by OrlesianHat (explicit)

I don't tend to be into non-canon AUs, but I found I enjoyed this one quite a lot. Lucifer is being sent on a blind date, and the person he meets isn't exactly what he expected... or is he? There's no murder involved so automatically the fic is much gentler than canon would be, particularly with Alastor, but a while after reading it I had to go digging to find it again because something about it stuck with me. I love Alastor's unrepentant selfishness, and Lucifer's long-suffering mood of 'these are things I really should not be okay with but apparently I'm okay with them because I'm still here'. If you're looking for something a little softer after all the angsty cliffhangers we get in other fics (the angsty cliffhanger in this one has been resolved, thank you), then this might be for you.

[canisbrutus]

Hey I really like your headcanons !!! What’s your view on the main three’s relationship with each other?

why thank ya, color me flattered lol. let me see.. this will be Long

Gary & Jimmy 🐍🐕

tragic doomed toxic yaoi etc etc

ultimately they're two sides of the same coin, opposite eachother in a way. both are simultaneously victims and perpetrators, though they differ in motive and response

while jimmy might be too daft to realize, gary knows this and absolutely hates it.

like a fine mix of admiration jealousy and spite

jimmy meanwhile is just fed up his bullshit

but at the same time he doesnt *hate* him.

jimmy doesnt really hate anyone tbh hes just easily pissed off

after the betrayal jimmy is annoyed at best and personally hurt at worst. but he can shrug it off with ease. he doesnt hold grudges

which is yet another thing that drives gary nuts

before the betrayal though. jimmy made gary feel Weird. jimmy's too genuine. too upfront. too honest. Too Real.

he took their friendship seriously. very very few people willingly stood beside gary, minus petey who we'll get to later

and that made him ? scared. confused even. absolutely nobody could be equal with him. even if he liked their relationship

anyway. this vvv

Petey & Gary 🐇🐍

petey primarily hung around gary because he was familiar and it was better than being alone, yes.

but also, these two go back a fair ways. like elementary.

as such, petey knows more about gary than he would like him to.

gary has been through a Lot. he's also Lost a Lot.

petey is one of the few 'things' he has left that really means anything to him.

or. he was, anyway. before the betrayal

shortly after the fight in the pit he got in an argument with gary. cut him deep where it hurts. mentioned something he maybe shouldnt have.

got beaten bloody and thrown away. and gary devolved from there.

despite this petey doesnt really hold it against him either

there's some guilt to him. perhaps a bit of self loathing.

but he couldnt approach gary on his own. his nerves were too shot.

sure gary threw his friend jimmy to russell. and sure gary's been picking on him for years at this point. but to beat the shit out of him, his best friend, after he's stayed with him for just about a decade?

he couldnt trust him again

he hardly trusted him to begin with honestly, gary had been beating him down and making sure he knew whatever prior cuts he made at him didnt hurt in the slightest before.

thankfully jimmy isnt as sensitive as he is.

~~~~~

Jimmy & Petey 🐕🐇

poor kids. two peas in a pod thrown under the bus

petey may have been apprehensive of jimmy at first, due to his general attitude and knack for mayhem.

but as time passed jimmy showed his true colors and proved to be a Good person (if prone to manipulation)

it wasnt long before petey started to trust him more than gary. and after the betrayal, jimmy was all he really had.

(admittedly he did try to join the nerds but earnest called him a faggot and said no)

petey isnt meek. he isn't soft. his venom is often dwarfed by everyone else's, but he still holds a rage. even if he keeps it inside. part of him did want to get back at gary. but another part still felt concern for his old friend spiraling like mad. even moreso considering he pushed him the way he did, with that argument mentioned.

im saying this ^ bc he felt an obligation to advise jimmy on what to do, especially regarding gary. hoping he could get him calmed tf down so they could go back to normal, as friends, again.

but they werent particularly close. kinda like business partners. jimmy blowing him off half the time didnt help matters.

but again. petey didnt have anyone else.

just a poor guy caught in the middle of their homoerotic rivalry

~~~~~

i have so many lores for these stupid cunts.

anyway reminder that my inbox is open for requests in general. woof

[hc masterpost link]

[like-rain-or-confetti]

Top 5

How would the rogues react to S/O being admitted to Arkham?

Admitted to Arkham

When being around the rogues and their impossibly difficult lives. Well... even the most sane would crack. However, no one expected a violent crime. His significant other stood behind the glass of the holding cell. Unafraid, a look in their eye that was unfamiliar.

Scarecrow: He grabbed Batman's arm. "Look, I'm a lot of things but never had the patience to lie to you. I study psychology. I did it for a living. I do it out of pure passion and obsession, and I am telling you (Y/N) couldn't have done this." Batman took his hand off his arm calmly. "But they did." (Y/N) smiled behind the glass when Batman walked away. "Didn't see this coming, did you?" You asked. "Ironic, isn't it? You should have been the first to notice." Your smile slowly fell. "Shows how much you've been paying attention to our life together, hm?" "I'll fix you. I'll fix all of this." He said finally. You tilted your head. "You couldn't even fix yourself. You know me, Jonathan. I couldn't hurt a fly." Your smile destroyed any credibility that statement had.

The Riddler: "This isn't you. They're saying you've done this. That there's something wrong with you, and you're just-" you interrupted Edward, cutting him off sharply yet calmly. "I'm not the problem. There is nothing wrong with me because no one can say anything about what I do when no one else is in a relationship with you. You're the problem. This is what it took for you to notice something was wrong. This is what you drove me to." Edward looked horrified.

Two-Face: "The fuck is wrong with you?" Harv' gritted out. "Yes, when I do it, I'm nuts. When you do it, it's justice." Your voice cold as ice. He twitched. "That's not what we're saying." Harv' replied. Harvey took over. "Look, I understand this more than you might want to believe, but I do. You...you need to talk to me, gorgeous. I need to know what's going on in that head of yours. We...we can fix this." He was pleading, his voice showing his desperation. "Come on baby, you're breaking my heart. Please talk to me. Baby...I'm the fucked up one. That was never you. I'm nuts enough for the both of us. Please don't tell me I..." A tear ran down his face.

Black Mask: "Have you lost your fuckin' mind!? You weren’t supposed to do this! This isn’t how it was supposed to be! "Yes i did and you know what, Roman? You should be thanking me. I should be awarded partner of the fucking year because of what I did for you. Do you even realise how much evidence my crime covers from yours?" He was clearly furious but didn’t speak of it. His head runnkng through scenarios and suggestions of how to fix it. Finally, he gritted out. "You'll be out by morning. I'll make sure of it." He turned immediately to start making the first of many many calls.

Mad Hatter: Jervis wasn't coping. He didn't understand how it could have happened. What he had missed to get to the point. So he had no answers to GCPD's questions. Or Batman's. His mind reeling and trying to make sense of what he was seeing. (Y/N) spoke up either to indirectly protect him or irritated by the scene- no one was sure. "Why? Why ask Jervis anything? He's living a damn fantasy. He doesn't see me. He sees what he wants to see from me. He always has but this? This was always coming. Whether I accepted it or not. We were always heading this way. This is always where I was going."

[aeternallis]

Kim and his home / A Meta Rant

Y'know, in a lot of post-canon fics I see for Kimchay, there's sometimes this common theme of Kim refusing to move back home, either because he likes his freedom too much, or he just hates Korn to the point he refuses to share a roof with him.

And tbh, strictly speaking from my own personal experience as an Asian, I've always felt this aforementioned theme to be more in line with a western individualistic mindset, rather than the one the show is more accurately set in: an eastern collectivist mindset.

So I thought I'd talk about it~ Having said that, please do not take this as an attack or critique of anyone or their works, it isn't. Fics are fics, headcanons are headcanons, they're meant to be enjoyed as they are. This is simply an observation I made, so again, I want to yap about it.

See, I am of the opinion that since Chay has moved into the Theerapanyakul compound, it’s actually more in line for Kim to move back into the mansion as well, rather than continue to keep away.

This idea is also foreshadowed by Tankhun when he asks Kim in ep. 5:

But before I continue, here's a theory I've been nursing for a while: technically speaking, if one were to line up how Kim and Chay were left off in the show, and how their story picks up in the first KP novel in that order, we already have some idea of how their story would have gone, had BOC and DAEMI’s working relationship not broken down, they weren't as problematic to work with, and Build didn’t have his scandal(s). 

At the very least, we have the skeletal roadmap of what BOC theoretically would have had to work with, had they been greenlit for a KP season 2.

A short summary of KimChay in the first novel:

During Porchay’s special chapter, Chay secretly follows Porsche to the Theerapanyakul mansion. When he’s at the gates, he makes a show of bravado of justifying why Porsche shouldn’t work there anymore, until Korn sees him. Korn tries to calm Chay down, but to no avail, until Kim pulls up in another car. It’s at this point that Chay mentions being familiar with Kim, and that they have some bad history that was never resolved. Kim corners Chay against the wall like the Theerapanyakul hubby that he is, until Chay kicks him in the nuts for acting all intimidating. 🤣 The special chapter ends with Chay getting dragged away from the compound, unbeknownst to Porsche. Later, Chay moves into the compound around the time Porsche and Kinn are kidnapped. Before facing the kidnappers, Kinn had told Chay to get ahold of Pete and ask for help, hence why Chay is brought to the compound in the first place. Presumably, this would also be around the same time he gets reacquainted with Kim (and most probably makes up with him). During the kidnap scene, Kinn tells Chay to call Pete and ask for back up. The next time we see Chay, he's visiting Porsche in the hospital, and Kim volunteers to take him home (as in, back to the Theerapanyakul mansion); it's implied that they've been spending quite a bit of time together, if Porsche's comments about it throughout the rest of the novel aren't indication enough. The rest of the story has them appearing here and there, mostly when Chay is complaining about the prospects of Kim cheating and/or no longer being in love with him. Lol There are some especially important moments between Chay and Porsche when they talk about their circumstances, but I don't want to spoil that scene in this rant too much.

In the show however, Chay's moving into the Theerapanyakul household is delayed later in the show's adaptation of the events, and he doesn't move in until the incident with his own kidnapping. By the end of the show, he's seen to be firmly ensconced in the Theerapanyakul compound, as we see in his last two scenes.

Focusing on Porchay's special chapter and his mention of the "bad history" between him and Kim in the novel, I'd always wondered if BOC had taken that line from the book and just ran with it, yknow? It would make sense (to me personally, at least), since Kimchay's story is different in the novel when compared to the show.

Although their stories are different, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they contradict each other. And with the first official art of the KimChay novel having been released, it’s clear now that DAEMI/Tiara_ME intend to incorporate the show’s KimChay story into their own (to what extent, who knows).

Having said this, let’s get back on topic: the likelihood of Kim moving back into the mansion had KP been greenlit for a season 2.

For a little bit of cultural context, I'll bring up three points (very generalized, mind you).

In Asia, the idea of children moving out once they’re 18 (or older, depending on the country’s age of consent laws) is very much a western concept. Most children in Asia don’t leave their family homes until they’re married, and even then, they sometimes still opt to live with their parents along with their spouse, so they can save money to buy their own in the meantime. In fact, a lot of Asian households can also have multiple generations living under one roof (I myself am also in this situation, at least part of the time when I go home overseas). That's not to say that children moving out early, or running away, or getting kicked out from home is unheard of, but for the most part, it's a rarer scenario compared to how normalized it is in the US.

For all that Kim goes behind Korn’s back, outwardly and at least towards his two elder brothers, Kim is a good son, in so far at least that he’s willing to go undercover in order to figure out the stink of what his family is connected to. He is loyal to his family—he’s protective over Kinn, and he’s gentle in how he interacts with Tankhun. Despite having moved out, the bored ease with which he strides into the compound shows that he visits often enough that it’s not an uncommon occurrence; the deference the bodyguards show him also supports this theory.

And finally, perhaps the strongest clue: when Chan tells him that Korn wants to see him at the end of ep 13, Kim cannot bring it in himself to disobey his father, no matter his own desire to go after the Kittisawasds. No matter what suspicions Kim may have of his father, at the end of the day, as my previous point—he is a good son, a filial one (all of them are, tbh). He doesn't outwardly show disagreements against Korn, and even during that tense meeting between them in ep 5, Kim shows some level of affection by bringing his father food. And yes, while I do agree that a lot of his smiles and behavior towards Korn is just for show, it doesn't change the fact that Kim doesn't want to disrupt the family harmony amongst them. At the very least—he actively chooses not to be the cause of that disruption.

So, with this context in mind, I’m of the opinion that Kim is more likely to move back into the compound, rather than continue to keep away. In fact, in the book, this is one of the big themes with Kim and Porchay: it’s due to Chay’s presence at the Theerapanyakul household that Tankhun comments about how Kim is often at home now.

It's Chay's presence in the mansion that brings Kim home.

The way I see it, Kim moved out because he had the luxury to do so. And I don’t mean this in the way that he’s able to discard his family obligations and pursue his own dreams, not at all.

I mean it in the most basic sense: Kim—or rather, the Theerapanyakuls—have the financial luxury to allow for Kim to move away. For any person that age, who wouldn’t choose to have their own space if they could honestly afford to do so? Besides that, it’s not out of the realm of possibility that the apartment complex Kim lives in is owned by their family, hahaha! But I digress!

Getting back on point: Kim is most likely to move back in, because he now has a reason to do so, that being Chay.

I've always been of the belief that throughout this couple's story in the show and all the way from the beginning, it was always Chay unknowingly stepping into Kim’s world of the mafia and becoming further involved, not just because of his brother, but more because of Kim’s growing feelings for him.

And then by the end of the show, how it makes for a resounding statement that it’s Kim who reaches out to Chay: he’s now the one stepping into Chay’s world—which just happens to be the world of the mafia.

In that sense, it’s Chay’s presence that ultimately brings/keeps Kim home, literally and figuratively. The way I see it, the fact that it's Chay's singular, enduring presence that would be the one to inspire Kim to come home is what makes their love story a powerful one, and one that can measure up equally to the other two.

[nagujake]

୨⎯Faking It: Part 1⎯୧

pairing: classmate!Theo x fem!reader

synopsis: you're the good student, never getting into any trouble, living a pretty bland life and always prioritizing school. Until a student from one of your classes approaches you with an insane proposal that you can't help but accept.

genre: strangers to lovers, college au, fake relationship

word count: 4.8k

warnings: None! Just lots of plot!

a/n: I want to release this in parts, maybe 2 or 3. I'm not sure yet but I hope you like it! Technically, the reader has a name in this story. It was a bit easier to write it this way. NOT PROOF READ

The chilly Seoul air sent shivers down my body. The leaves on the trees were starting to change from a light green to a bright orange and yellow, an exciting reminder that Autumn was just around the corner. Classes at school were just getting into full swing and the University was bustling with students and teachers racing from class to class but luckily, my class for the day got cancelled.

I was sitting in the outdoor seating at the campus cafe, studying for some exams I had coming up.

"Yujin!" I looked up from my laptop and looked around for the voice that called out my name. My best friend's bright smile made its way into my line of sight. "Hi Lina!" She raced over and sat down next to me, pulling out her laptop and chattering away to me about her latest boy toy.

This was a usual thing, it happened almost everyday but she made the conversation enthralling and it was entertaining hearing about all the men she was messing around with on a consistent basis.

"Yujin, are you hearing me right now?! He wants me to meet his parents! I don't even remember what this guy looks like, like I haven't even seen him in weeks". I started giggling "well you better figure it out girl, this sounds like a Lina problem" She rolled her eyes "Yujin, you don't even understand, boys don't like you!" I gasped and hit her arm "Lina! You bitch. It's not that boys don't want me, it's that I don't want these boys. They're all so childish and I'm more worried about my studies than a man" She rolled her eyes and went back to her laptop "I will find a man for you, don't worry" I just giggled and focused my attention back on my laptop.

We had been studying for about half an hour and Lina was starting to get antsy. "I can't sit here anymore, I'm gonna go into the cafe and get a drink and a snack, do you want anything?"

I sat there thinking for a moment "uh yea can you bring me back a banana nut muffin?!" She nodded and stood up, slowly making her way into the cafe.

I looked over to my books and read over a couple paragraphs before I was interrupted.

"Hey, Yujin right?" I quickly looked up at the unfamiliar voice.

I smiled up to the man "uh yeah.. you're Theo right?" He nodded and sat down in the chair on the opposite side of the table "I had a question". I adjusted in my chair and looked at him "ok?"

Theo was in my economics class, I had only ever talked to him once but he was a nice and quiet guy. He normally kept to himself most of the time.

"This is gonna sound insane but, can you be my girlfriend for a weekend?" I widened my eyes in shock "what do you mean for a weekend?" While his request was insane, I was curious to know more information. "My parents are having me go back to my hometown for a day or two and I need someone to be my pretend girlfriend for a couple days" He looked over at me, a shy smile playing along his lips.

I was kind of speechless. Why in the world was he asking me? "I have some questions first" he nodded "ask away" "For one, why do you need to pretend? and two, why are you asking me this?" I stared at him expectantly, genuinely awaiting his answers.

He smiled "I've avoided a lot of situations with the excuse that my girlfriend had something going on that I needed to be there for, so now of course they're gonna think I have a girlfriend. And I'm asking you because you're normal. You take your studies very seriously, you don't go out much, you're very kind and respectful" 

I just looked at him straight faced "Theo that's crazy. Why wouldn't you just be honest with your family? And you're crazy for asking me". He let out a small scoff before responding "Yujin, I don't need a lecture about lying to them, I'm just asking you to do this for me" I sat forward in my seat, to get a little bit closer to him "Theo, I barely know you!" "Then let's get to know each other, it's a couple days, please. You're the only person that seems good enough for them. You're the perfect girl for me to have".

I closed my laptop to focus on him better "I need to think about it, when are they expecting you?" "Not this weekend but the next. Enough time for us to get to know each other better" I wasn’t going to accept his insane request, I’m not the type to do things like this at all but at the same time, how many times does this really happen?

"What's in it for me? What do I get out of this?" I asked sternly and he sighed "I don't know, what do you want?" I bit my lip, I don't know why but I wasn’t expecting him to ask what I wanted in return. I hadn’t thought this far. "I don't know right now, if I agree, I'll have to think about it but-”

Our conversation was cut short when Lina's loud shriek was heard at the sight of me and Theo. "Yujin! Who is thissss?!" She intentionally dragged out her sentence and I rolled my eyes. Theo and I both looked over at her and I sighed "this is Theo, he's in my Econ class" She giggled as she sat down, sliding my muffin over to me. "Hi Theo! I'm her bestie Lina" Theo just smiled at her without saying a word. There was an awkward silence between the 3 of us, with Lina just smiling at us. "Theo, how about you just put your number in my phone and I'll text you" I pulled out my phone and unlocked it, passing it over to him. He quickly put his number in and passed it back.

He stood up and smiled "I'll talk to you later Yujin" I smiled and nodded to him and we watched him walk away.

"Oh my god Yujin, how did I not know about him? He's cute" I rolled my eyes at her "don't corrupt him, he's a good guy". She giggled "oh I won't, he's yours" I shook my head and started to pack up my books and laptop. "Lina, I'm gonna go home and relax for a while. I'll call you later" "No! Don't go yet" she pouted her lips at me "no, don't give me that. You have boys to tend to and I wanna go home" She huffed and threw her arms down "fine, I'll talk to you later!"

I grabbed my bag and threw it over my shoulder "see ya". I quickly rushed away, wanting to get home as quickly as I could.

~~~~

I threw my book bag down on the bench next to the front door and was greeted by my puppy "Hi Lune, were you a good girl today?" I gave her a few pets and continued into my apartment. My roommate was sat on the couch "Hey!" "Hey, did you let Lune outside yet?" "Yeah we just came in!" I nodded in response and went into my room to change.

I flopped onto my bed and opened my phone, just scrolling through my social media. This was my usual routine. Just sitting on my phone and doing school work. I didn't have much of a life outside of school. Lina was really my only close friend, but we are very different people. She loved to party, drink and was always out. I was always at home, worrying about school.

I laid there, biting my lip while pulling up Theo's contact. Theo was a sweet guy, and maybe this wouldn't be so bad. It would definitely give me something to do since Lina was always busy. I hovered over the call button, debating on if I wanted to do this or not. 

Fuck it.

The phone started to ring and I brought it to my ear. After a few rings, Theo's voice greeted me "hello?" "It's me Theo" "Yujin! I didn't think you would even get back to me". I anxiously smiled at his words. I didn’t think I'd get back to him either, to be honest. "Well whatever I had decided, I woulda let you know regardless" "ok, well, did you decide?" The question hung in the air for a few seconds. If I wanted to go back on my decision, I still had time. "Uh yea, fuck it, let's do it". "Actually? Okay well, let's meet up tomorrow if that's fine" "yeah! Just text me when and where, I'll be there" "perfect, talk to you later" "bye Theo" "bye".

I smiled as I hung up the phone. Maybe this will be a fun experience and maybe I would gain another friend out of it, I genuinely needed someone that wasn’t Lina. I needed a normal friend.

~~~~

As I got closer to school, I could see Lina leaned up against the brick entrance way to the campus. It's like she knew I was there, as her head turned so quickly with a big smile on her face. "Yujin!" She skipped over to me and snaked her arm around mine. "Good morning Lina" "good morninnngg.. how's Theo?" I stopped walking and rolled my eyes at her "I don't know how Theo is Lina, because me and Theo aren't a thing". She bit her lip and giggled "he's cute, you should really get to know him" I sighed and started walking again. I love Lina but the one thing I hate about her is that she's always in my business. She needs to know everything that's going on in my life, and it gets to be pretty annoying.

~~~~

I walked into my Econ class, immediately looking to Theo's usual seat, but it was empty. I shuffled into my spot and pulled out my phone to text him. I hadn't received any messages from Theo today, like we talked about on the phone, and he wasn't in class which is super unusual for him. As I was typing out my message to him, someone quickly sat down next to me but I ignored them to finish my text.

"Hey" I jumped and looked over, speak of the devil, it was Theo. I clicked my phone off and smiled over at him. "Hi, I was wondering where you were, you're always here early" "yeah I woke up late. My parents kept me up all night talking about this next weekend and stuff. They're driving me nuts" I let out a soft laugh. "I'm sorry, hopefully once this is all done, they'll lay off a little" I gave him a small smile and he returned it. "Where were you thinking of meeting up later?" He thought for a second and responded "It doesn't matter. The coffee shop or the library. Wherever is fine".

As I sat there and thought about it, then Lina popped into my head. Lina was always lingering where I was, no matter what. I didn't want her to see me and Theo together. She would just annoy us and then annoy me about it after the fact. "Actually, can we meet at my place? It'll just be a bit more private there. I don't want Lina bothering us, because she will" He laughed quietly "Yeah that's fine. Just text me your address and when you want me over" I nodded "of course".

We both sat there for a minute staring at each other awkwardly until he spoke "I'm gonna go to my seat, I just wanted to make sure we were able to talk" I nodded towards him and watched him walk away. I quickly turned my phone back on and deleted the previous text I was sending to him, replacing it with a message including my address and what time to come by. After I sent it I looked back at him as he checked his phone. He looked up at me and smiled, giving me a thumbs up and I smiled back at him.

~~~~

I ran to the apartment door after hearing a couple knocks. I wanted to quickly get Theo inside before my roommate came home and saw a man in here. "Hey!" "Hey, come in". He shuffled inside and looked around "do you live here alone?" "Oh no, I have a roommate, she's out right now" he just nodded and stared at me.

"Let's go to my room, do you want anything first? Something to eat or drink?" He shook his head and I gestured for him to follow me.

Once he made his way into my room, I closed the door behind him and clicked the lock over. He sat down at my desk and I walked over and sat on my bed. "Okay so we really just need to get to know each other right?" "Yea, and make up a little story about our relationship too" I nodded and bit my lip "well what have you told them so far? Haven't they asked questions?" "They tried but I shut it down, all they know is that you go to the same university as me and we met in class" "which is true, so maybe this won't be so bad" We were both silent for a few minutes "how long have we been together?" "Since April.. So 6 months" I nodded "if they don't know much now then, we can really say anything" he nodded "yeah, but my friends think a little bit more than my family, I've told them more". I gave him a small glare "Like?" "They may or may not think we live together" He scrunched his face a bit and I widened my eyes and sighed "okay, it's not like they'll be trying to come over or anything right?"

He took a moment and shook his head "they shouldn't" "Okay well, now that we kinda have that figured out, take this-" I held out a pen and paper and he stood up to grab it, then sat back down "just write down a bunch of random info and fun facts about yourself you think I should know and I'll do the same" He spun around in the chair and put the paper down and began to write and I did the same.

As we sat there for a few minutes both doing our thing until my name was yelled from the living room "Yujin!" I jumped at the call of my name and Theo did the same and looked at me. "It's my roommate, I'll be right back" I stood up and walked over the door, leaving the room.

"Hey Nari, what's up?" "I need to talk to you about something" "okay go ahead" She stared at me, tears started to pool in her eyes "why are you crying?! What happened" "I'm moving. I got approved to spend the rest of my school year in England" I smiled "oh my god, you've been hoping for that! You don't seem very happy?" She sat down on the couch "I am, I'm just so sad to leave you, and I barely have time to even process it because I leave on Saturday" I pulled out my phone briefly checking what day it was again "it's Thursday.." she nodded "I know. Will you be okay living here alone?" I let out a small laugh "of course I will Nari" She looked up at me and let out a giggle "please don't let Lina move in here, she's insane and you need a private space away from her" we both started laughing "don't worry, I wouldn't want her living with me" She held out her arms for a hug and I slid into them, engulfing her in a huge hug. We both stood there embracing each other and a loud noise came from my room.

We both looked over to my bedroom door "is someone here with you?" I took a moment before responding "yeah, a friend. I'm gonna go see what that was" I let her go and walked to my room, opening my door.

I tried to slip inside quickly but Nari was hot on my trail, pushing her way through my door "hi!" She happily greeted him and he smiled at her. I looked between the two of them for a moment, before stopping on Theo. "Theo what was that?" "I was looking at your stuff on your bookshelf and I dropped something" "did it break, are you good?" He nodded "yeah I'm good, nothing broke" I let out a sigh then Nari spoke "I'm Nari, her roommate.. or her old roommate" she waved softly and he returned it "I’m Theo, I'm her.." his voice trailed off and he looked at me expectantly but I just left it at that. "Nari we were studying, but I will talk to you more later". She smirked at me "yeah, I know you will. I have questions" I rolled my eyes at her and softly shoved her out of my room.

I turned back to Theo "sorry". He smiled and shook his head "it's okay, she seems nice" "she is.. um did you get done with the paper?" "Not quite yet, did you?" I shook my head "no, let's finish those quick". We both walked back to our spots and continued what we were doing before.

~~~~

"Yujin.. hey wake up" I fluttered my eyes open and looked around briefly, before meeting Theo's smile. "Ugh I fell asleep on you, I'm sorry" "it's okay, I don't mind. I let you sleep for a little bit". I sat up and felt around my bed for my phone, checking the time- 8:00 pm. "It's late, you should probab-" I was cut off by the sound of my stomach growling. I widened my eyes and looked up at Theo. "I'm sorry" I said with a giggle. "Are you hungry?" I just nodded at him. "You wanna go get something?" I nodded again and he smiled "I have a really good place we can go, come on". He walked to my doorway and waited for me. I stood up from my bed and patted down my clothes a little bit to look more presentable. I rushed over to him and smiled "ok let's go!". 

~~~~

Theo and I sat there waiting for the waitress to come by and bring the bill. We were both locked and loaded with our cards, ready to pay for dinner.

"Put your card down Yujin, I got it" I shook my head "no! I got it!" He pushed my hand down and I began to fight back and push his out the way as well. We were both giggling, while playfully shoving each other's cards away.

Our laughing faded and Theo froze and stared at the door. I turned around quickly and looked at the door, then back at Theo confused. "What Theo?" "My friends are here Yujin. Our acting needs to start now!" I widened my eyes "Theo we're not ready-" I was cut off by 3 men approaching us, greeting Theo. He quickly grabbed my hand and smiled at them. "Hey guys!" "Hey Theo! And who is this?" They all looked at me and I smiled "this is Yujin! My..uh.. girlfriend" "Hi!" They all introduced themselves and sat down next to us and began talking.

"Yujin we've been waiting to meet you! We keep pestering him about you but he's very private about your relationship. We couldn't even come over to his place because you guys live together" I smiled at them "yeah we live a very private life" he glanced over at Theo who was smiling and nodding in agreement with me. "Well maybe we can come by now since we've finally met you!" I bit my lip and my heart started racing as Theo began to speak "yeah definitely, we'll have to plan a time!" Keeho looked at everyone at the table "maybe this Saturday? Are you guys free?"  I looked at Theo and widened my eyes slightly and he stared at me for a second before responding "yeah we're free!" I widened my eyes and kicked Theo under the table "ow, who just kicked me!" Intak hollered "Keeho was it you?" Keeho shook his head and we all continued to talk without acknowledging the kick anymore. 

I hadn't even noticed that the waitress had come for the payment but once she had finally returned with my card, I immediately stood up "well guys, we were actually heading out of here, but we'll see you on Saturday! It was nice to meet you!" I held out my hand for Theo to take which he did as he stood. "See you guys in a couple days!" 

Theo and I began to walk out and when we made it out of the restaurant, I let his hand go and hit him over the shoulder "what the fuck Theo, now what? Why would you tell them they could come to our apartment?! We don't even have one!" He stared at me for a quick time "I have an idea.. but I'm not sure you're gonna like it" I looked around thinking for a second before making eye contact with him and widening my eyes "Theo, no" "please it's the only way it'll work. I won't move in all my stuff, just enough for it to look real" I ignored his plea and began to walk away towards my apartment.

We walked for a few minutes and stopped at my apartment door "fine. You're moving all your shit over here then, I'll just help put it away. You better be quick though, we only have 2 days". I unlocked my apartment door, to find that Nari had already cleared some of her stuff out. Theo followed me in "she works quick huh?" I turned to him and nodded "this just makes it easier for you, I guess. Go home and get some rest, we're gonna be busy Tomorrow"

He smiled and nodded "thank you for helping me out here" I sighed and gave him a glare "of course, it just better be worth it for me in the end". He made his way out my apartment and I locked the door behind him.

The things I'm doing for this man are insane, but I guess it brings some excitement to my life.

~~~~

My eyes flickered open as my phone began ringing on my nightstand. I sat up and quickly rubbed the sleep from my eyes before grabbing it to see who was calling. "Good morning Theo" "hey good morning! I had a question for you. Is it okay if I start bringing stuff in before I have to go to class at 12" "um yeah that's fine. I have class in an hour but if you lock up, you can move more stuff while I'm gone" "perfect thank you, I'll be over before you leave so I can get the door code" "ok see ya"

I laid in bed for a few minutes before jumping out of it and sliding my slippers on. I walked to the living room, greeting Lune sleeping peacefully. "Hey you wanna go potty?!" I walked over and grabbed her leash then clipped it to her collar, before making our way outside. As I walked her around the yard of my apartment building, I could see Lina running up to us, out of the corner of my eye. "Hey Lina" "hey girl, you're still in your jammies? You're always up and going early". I sighed "I was up late last night with-" I stopped talking and looked up at her quickly. Her mouth fell open "up late with who Yujin?!" I bit my lip and quickly thought of something to say "homework, I never said it was a person" though it was a person, I was out late with Theo but she did not need to know that. She pursed her lips together "hm you sure? You sure it wasn't Theo??" She asked, nudging my shoulder, causing me to roll my eyes. I turned away to walk Lune around some more before Lina stopped me. "Speak of your man, here he comes". I spun around quickly and widened my eyes, I wasn't expecting him this early and of course it's when Lina is here.

"Hey Yujin, hey Lina" Before I could speak Lina butt in "what have you got there Theo?" I gazed at the boxes in his hands and then sighed. "You can just take it up there, the doors unlocked" Theo smiled and nodded at me before walking away and into the building. "Girl, is he moving in or something? I saw clothes in those boxes". "Please don't worry about it, mind your business for once". She stepped back and put her hand to her chest "bitch, I'm just curious what's going on between the two of you" "nothing Lina, nothing at all. Please don't worry about it... I gotta get ready for class, I'll see you later" I didn't wait for a response, I just grabbed Lune and made my way back up to my apartment. 

Theo was just setting the boxes down and looked at me "I'm sorry, I didn't know she was here" I brushed it off quickly "I didn't know she'd be here either, but I got rid of her" I said with a smile.

He bit his lip then spoke "you might have to lie to her and tell her we're together or something" "absolutely not. When this is over in about a week, I'll tell her the situation. I'm not telling her we're together, cause we're not" His head fell as he looked down "I just thought it'd be easier than us trying to avoid her.. because she always find her way around" I smiled "I know, it's frustrating but it'll be fine" He began to open up his boxes and grab things out. "If you have clothes, they can go into my room. There's room in the dresser and hangers available in the closet" he nodded and continued to unpack.

~~~~

I slowly unlocked the door to my apartment, finally done with classes for the day and Theo greeted me at the door. I jumped and put a hand to my chest "I didn't realize you'd still be here" He smiled wide "yea I came back after class to finish up but I am finished. I hung up a few things and did some other stuff to make it look like I lived here" I took a quick look around and took in the changes. "Looks good... I'm nervous for tomorrow". "why? It'll go just fine, Yujin. I'm the one that should be nervous" he said with a laugh. I shook my head nervously "What if we have to kiss or hug or something?" "now why in the world would we have to kiss?" I just shrugged "as for a hug, it's just a hug, what if we have to hug? We'll have to show some sort of affection or else they'll think we're weird" "so what? They'll never see me again". He stared at me for a moment before walking closer and grabbing my shoulders. "Hugging once in a while won't be that bad Yujin". Before I knew it, he pulled me into him and wrapped his arms around my waist for a hug. I paused for a moment before finally draping my arms over his shoulders and securing the hug.

After a few moments he let go and stepped back "see hugs aren't weird". I took another step back "okay maybe not, we'll just figure it all out tomorrow! I'm gonna go get changed and start my homework"

I quickly turned around and began walking to my room. Before I could get too far, he grabbed my wrist lightly "hey wait". I turned back around and he let me go and smiled "um so am I still staying at my place or.. here?" I bit my lip nervously "um you can stay here tonight just so we're prepared for tomorrow. I just put new sheets and stuff on Nari's old bed so you can sleep in there". I gave him a shy smile and retreated to my room but before I could completely close the door, I spoke "please don't kill me or my dog in our sleep. I'm trusting you to not be a weirdo" He began laughing "don't worry, you can trust me" I smiled and nodded at him and closed my bedroom door.

[amazingmsme]

Won’t You Stay? (Just a Little Bit Longer)

AN: FINALLY finished the last fic for tickletober! Sorry for the wait, I wanted to finish the other fics first & been pretty busy. This one was a blast to write, & I got to really dive into their relationship dynamic! Mark & Karen def picked Ted up at a bar lmaooo. Anyway, without further ado, here’s day 31!

No warnings, but things are insinuated. Nothing explicit, just some light bondage.

In Hatchetfield, the strange quickly becomes mundane. Having lived there all his life, Ted was not easily phased. He saw weird shit all the time and brushed it off with ease. Yet he was still taken aback when the notoriously prude-y, picture perfect couple that was Karen and Mark Chasity walked up to him at the bar of all places. He didn't even think they went to bars.  He thought uptight christian nut jobs like that fainted at the smell of booze, but apparently he was wrong. He was wrong about a lot of things, lately.

"So, what's the score?" Mark asked as he slid up to the bar, pointing at one of the numerous flat screens above shelves of liquor. "21 to six," he answered with a smirk, taking a swig of his beer. Mark let out a low whistle.

"Geez, they're getting creamed." Ted scoffed in amusement, looking him up and down.

"Don't tell me you're a fuckin' Cowboys fan," he taunted. He chuckled shyly, ducking his head.

"What can I say? I like to root for the underdogs."

Was he hallucinating, or did Mark just fucking wink at him? Wasn't his wife right there? Wait, where did she go? He could've sworn she had been clinging to his arm just a second ago-

"A piña colada please," Karen spoke up on his left. He nearly jumped out of his skin because when the hell did she sit down? And shouldn't she have at least sat on his other side? Maybe, I don't know, next to her husband?

Apparently, she wasn't done with her order, feeling the need to specify, "And make it dirty." She was looking directly at him when she said that, twirling a lock of hair around her finger as she bit her lip.

Ted was extremely confused. If he didn't know any better, he'd say they were coming onto him. But that was impossible! There's no way in hell that they would be looking for a third, and especially not someone like him.

They were nothing but pure vanilla, as pristine as the driven snow. He was like a muddy puddle. This was just a coincidence. A really, really weird coincidence.

"I'll have a Jim Beam, on the rocks. Actually, make that two."

Okay, maybe they were trying to take him home.

"That's okay, I'm fine with a beer," he tried to decline, but Mark insisted.

"We all deserve a taste of the finer things in life."

Ted felt a blush creep to his cheeks, and not just from the alcohol. He couldn't remember the last time a sexual advancement had made him this flustered.

"Don't you agree?" Mark prompted when Ted didn't answer. He shook himself out of it and nodded vigorously.

"It's what separates us from the animals," he said, trying to sound smart.

"Well I couldn't agree more," Karen added, looking past Ted to her husband. And just like that, they found their third.

~~~

Things were admittedly a little awkward and stiff at first, but they quickly found their groove. They both were surprisingly kinky, not that Ted was complaining. It was just... so unexpected coming from them.

It felt nice being in on their dirty little secret. Or was he the secret in question?

Oh well. He supposed it didn't matter. Not when things were this good.

Ted flopped back on the bed, lying between the pair with a relaxed smile on his face. Karen snuggled closer to his right side, Mark lacing their fingers together on his left.

"That was really fun," Karen purred, walking her fingers up his chest.

"I'll say," Mark chimed in, offering a quick peck to Ted's cheek. He leaned across him so he could reach Karen, kissing her cheek.

"Yeah, you guys are amazing," he said, still breathless and dazed. "Same time again next week?" he asked, only half joking.

"Hey, there's no need to rush off again," Mark assured.

"Yeah, who are you? Cinderella?" she teased, the wine making her giggle at her own joke. Tipsy Karen was absolutely adorable. "Stay for a while," she insisted softly.

"That's okay, I don't wanna overstay my welcome," he shot back playfully. But what was meant as a lighthearted joke clearly struck a chord with each of them.

"After everything, you don't think you're welcome to just relax in our home? You're not just our lover, you're our guest. Stay; have a snack, watch some TV, whatever you wanna do." And didn't that sound nice...

But Ted Spankoffski never really had nice things. Or if he did, they didn't stick around for long.

"You sure? 'Cause if you're busy, I can get outta your hair," he offered, nervous butterflies fluttering about in the pit of his stomach. He's used to being the bootycall; to showing up on a whim for some casual sex, and getting kicked back out on the streets once they were done with him. But they actually wanted him to stay, which was why it was too good to be true.

"Oh I can be busy, if that's what you want," Mark growled, rolling over to straddle Ted's waist. He leaned down to plant a kiss to his lips, lingering with a gentle bite. Ted hummed, melting into the bed.

"You drive a hard bargain, Mr. Chasity," Ted smirked.

"I try," he shot him a wink, allowing his hand to roam Ted's chest.

"So why don't you ever want to stay?" Karen asked, with an exaggerated pout. The question caught him off guard, so he answered honestly.

"I want to stay, just... still not really used to the idea of you guys wanting that too," he admitted. Normally, he's never allow himself to be so vulnerable and bold with his emotions. But Mark and Karen were different. They didn't judge people, even people like him who should be judged, and they were nice. Like, genuinely nice. When he was with them, he felt seen and heard. He had spent nearly his whole life trying to run away from his emotions, but with them, he could finally relax.

"Oh Ted... Of course we want that," Karen spoke barely above a whisper, carding her fingers through his hair. Ted looked between them hopefully.

"Really?"

She offered a sweet, radiant smile. "Really."

"You're not just saying that to cheer me up?" he asked playfully.

"No, if we wanted to cheer you up, we'd do this!" Without warning, Mark began scribbling over his sides, drawing out a surprised giggly shriek.

"Hehehey wahahahait! D-dohon't!" he whined, flopping around uselessly on the bed.

"Why not? Is someone a little bit tiiiiiicklish?" Karen chimed in, using her long nails to flutter under his chin. He snorted and slammed his neck against his shoulder for protection.

"Noho!" he denied, a giddy, nervous grin plastered to his face.

"Uh oh honey, looks like we've got ourselves a liar," Mark taunted from above. His hands continued to knead the slight pudge around his middle, drawing out a few deeper laughs.

"Oh no, what should we do?" she asked, feigning innocence.

"I think..." Mark trailed off for dramatic effect, smirking when he heard Ted whine. "We should get the cuffs." The way Ted's eyes snapped open to look at them was priceless.

"What?" he screeched, excitement bubbling up inside him.

"That's the punishment for dirty rotten liars," Karen purred,  leaning over the side of the bed to rummage through their box of toys. She popped back up, showing off a pair of fuzzy, leopard print cuffs.

"Ihihi wasn't-" he began to protest, but Mark shushed him by placing a finger to his smiling lips.

"Don't try to back out now," Mark said, cocking his head to the side. "Arms up, tough guy."

"Why don't you make mehehe!" his defiant protest melted away into giggles. He didn't bother holding back his laughter; he doubted he could even if he wanted to.

Even through his delirium, he knew they were doing this for him. To make him relax, to show him they really cared... And to tease the living hell out of him.

God, they knew him so well.

He didn't resist when Mark slowly raised his arms above his head, snapping the cuffs into place, looping the short chain around the headboard. Ted gave his arms a weak tug, just for show. He squirmed in anticipation, a giddy smile plastered on his face from the threat of what was to come.

"You're gonna stay right there until we decide you can go. Got that?" Karen asked, cocking her head expectantly. Her tone was halfway between stern and caring.

"Yehes ma'am!" he agreed, arching his back when she slowly scribbled along his bare waistline.

"And we won't stop until you admit to yourself that we want you around for more than just sex," Mark added pointedly. Ted couldn't help but smirk at the new caveat.

"Well in that case, we'd be here ahahall nihihight! Ihihit was just ahaha joke!"

"Our love is no laughing matter!" Karen chastised through her own giggles, the fucking hypocrite.

“Oh, I got a joke for ya! What’s a pirate’s favorite letter of the alphabet?” Mark asked, barely able to finish his sentence before Ted answered.

“Ihihit’s R!”

“Ooo, close, but no.”

“What?” he screeched in shock before it took on a higher pitch as Mark dug into his ribs. Apparently, answering wrong had consequences.

“A pirate’s favorite letter is C! Get it? ‘Cause they sail the seas!”

“Thahat fuckin’ suhuhucks! No no wahahait, I’m sohohorry!” Ted apologized the moment he began vibrating his clawed hands against his ribcage.

“Language! You’re lucky I don’t wash your mouth out with soap instead,” Karen teased, kneading into his soft tummy. He snorted and bucked his hips, unable to dislodge the hands attacking his torso.

“Ihihi’m aha grown ass mahahan, I-I cahan say whatehehever I wahahant!”

“Really? Could’ve fooled me with that laugh of yours,” Mark taunted, enjoying the blush spreading across Ted’s cheeks.

“Hehehey!” he whined exaggeratedly.

“Oh Mark, be nice,” she mock scolded her husband, shooting him a contradictory wink. He smirked back.

“I am being nice. He’s not even screaming yet.”

“Mark!” Ted yelped at the playful threat.

“What? I’m just kidding!” he chuckled, crawling his fingers higher to scratch inside his exposed pits. He leaned in close to growl directly in Ted’s ear, ensuring he could be heard over his hysterics. “Or am I?”

Ted didn’t know what he did to deserve this. He didn’t know what he did to deserve them. They were kind, and cruel, and everything Ted could ever ask for, and he was grateful they chose him.

[haedia]

OC meme

I was tagged by @zwitter-iconic and @larkinna for this and since I have two Rooks that I love dearly, I'm going to do this twice (and tag them both for both, sorry) for both of them. This one is of my actual canon Rook, Kiore Aldwir. The other will be of Nera Aldwir, Kiore's cousin.

As for tagging, Iunno. If this looks fun, feel free to count it as me tagging you. And please tag me back so I can go read it. c:

I do like these a bunch, even if I don't always get around to doing them myself (thanks to energy levels, usually).

GENERAL

Name: Kiore Aldwir

Alias(es): Rook

Gender: (Gender-apathetic) Agender

Pronouns:  they/them and she/her. Kiore doesn't really care which.

Age: 35 (As of Veilguard)

Place of birth: Somewhere in the Green Dales

Spoken languages: Elvhen, Trade/Common, and just enough Antivan, Tevene, and Orlesian to be trouble

Sexual orientation: Mostly attracted to men

Occupation: Before VG: Expedition leader for particularly precarious excursions in Arlathan for the Veil Jumpers. Before joining the Veil Jumpers: Assisting their father in herding and raising their Clan's harts

FAVOURITE

Color: The kind of green you really only see when spring or early summer sunlight filters through a dense broadleaf canopy. Warm and alive.

Entertainment: Charming people into playing cards with them and then leaving their coin purses empty by the end. Kiore is a true rook in that sense. They don't always cheat at cards but it's never not a possibility that they will. Especially if they don't like you.

Pastime: Playing music with their family and the rest of the clan. Everyone in their immediate family is musically-inclined, as are a few others in the clan broadly, so when it starts up in the evening, it often becomes a whole thing and Kiore loves (and misses it) dearly.

Food: Kiore is not picky about food and enjoys a lot of different things from a lot of different cuisines but their favorite thing is a clan specialty made from Green Dales dried berries and wild nuts. The nuts are toasted until golden brown then, with the berries, are tossed with a spiced honey glaze. Sometimes it's further roasted at that point to make for a crisp, candied shell but either are great. Kiore loves it. Especially in winter.

Drink: They're a fan of coffee in almost any form (even the iced versions in Tevinter) but they're a big fan of a kind of berry and floral lemonade they had in Rivain one time. For those of us not in Thedas, it was something akin to a pomegranate hibiscus lemonade.

Books: Before VG: Kiore wasn't picky about reading material though they liked mysteries and books on folklore from across Thedas. During VG: They could only read sporadically but they were able to participate in the Book Club when they did anthologies and poetry, which allowed for Kiore to pop in since the amount of reading was more manageable for them. After VG: Once things calmed down, they reverted mostly to their previous preferences, though they developed a taste for the Randy Dowager's recommendations as well.

HAVE THEY

Passed university: The Veil Jumpers have a kind of educational thing that they want new members to pass, as it gives a lot of foundational knowledge to elven history and magic theory which can be necessary for survival once out in the field. Kiore has passed that and has helped add to the curriculum for newer recruits. But formal schooling beyond that? Nah. They know how to read and do some math but that's about it for educational background.

Had sex: Yep!

Had Sex in Public: Yep!

Gotten tattoos: Many! Kiore is practically covered in tattoos and they're very fond of them

Gotten piercings: Kiore has several in both ears but that's about it for piercings

Had a broken heart: A couple of times, yes

Been in love: Indeed, they have!

ARE THEY

A cuddler: Absolutely they are

Scared easily: Nah. Kiore isn't easily scared or startled.

Jealous easily: Nah. They're pretty chill about relationships in general and lean towards polyamorous, so it's good they aren't easily affected by jealousy.

Trustworthy: So long as you're not playing cards with them? Sure! Kiore does use their charm to their own benefit, but so long as you're not a jackass or something, you're in no danger of earning their ire.

FAMILY

Sibling(s): Kiore has an older brother named Ren (he finds it really fun when Kiore returns with the nickname Rook since they're now bird siblings, at least by the sound of their names, since Ren isn't Wren). He is nearly freakishly tall for an elf. Like, at least an inch or two taller than Davrin tall. It's a head-scratcher. Ren is also one of the clan's hunters/scouts.

Parents:  Both of Kiore's parents are still alive (though at this point in time, I don't know their names). Their dad is the head herdsman of the clan's harts. He's kind, quiet, and generally reserved. Very thoughtful but he's unassuming in a way that lulls people into thinking that he's just kind of chill but otherwise there's not much going on there. But he has a wickedly sharp wit and he's very observant so he tends to catch people off-guard. Their mother, by contrast, has a presence that tends to command attention. She's full of life and generally quick to laughter. She hums and sings while she works and she's very creatively and musically inclined. She's often in motion. When she stills and gets quiet, though, you know she's angry.

Children: Sometime after VG: Kiore and Lucanis get married and end up having at least four children. They all have very long names that I haven't decided on yet, but: The first are a twinset of boys, named after one of Lucanis' middle names + Lucanis' father's name + Kiore's brother and the other after one of Illario's middle names + Illario's father's name + Kiore's dad's name. One of the other four is a daughter, with a name blended from Lucanis' mother's name + Kiore's grandmother. And the fourth child I haven't yet decided on. But all four of those terrors are mages, which if you'd told Lucanis years ago that four of his kids were going to be born mages, he'd probably self-combust. But he loves his mage brats.

Pets: Fritter! Fritter is Kiore's family cat. He's a gray striped tabby with a white belly, white toe socks on his front paws, white boots on his back legs, and a kinked tail. He's very acclimated to the bustle of Dalish clan life and when the clan is traveling, he'll hitch a ride on a hart, behind its rider; or lounge on the deck of an aravel; or he'll hop between aravels and riders until he find someone's shoulders he wants to lie across (usually Kiore's dad or Ren). Eventually, he ends up at the Lighthouse with Kiore, and lives out his twilight years on the Dellamorte Estate, playing guardian to the mage brats. He's great!

[ashthewaterghoul]

https://www.tumblr.com/ashthewaterghoul/764396970844585984/i-have-a-question-about-your-phanter-cuddle

Heheheh okay okay I’m caving so I’ll ask;

So in the part of the fic it talks about how Phantom had to act like distant or refrain from showing more than respect to Copia, like just giving a hand shake when they’d run into each other. Basically both needing to act like they didn’t have a father/child relationship but more of a leader/colleague? Servant? Acquaintance? (Idk what term to use here)

Anyway, was there ever a moment that Copia saw Phantom, who was putting up a happy façade, when around the other ghouls and ghoulettes? Like he’d see from afar his baby bat looking like it wasn’t bothering the ghoul at all about being separated? Did the poor frater feel sad about it? That he was being forgotten?

Go nuts if the angst thought come to you, don’t hold back, I can take it! 😈

Oh, yeah, Copia hated it.

Man was already incredibly insecure, having had to have fought tooth and nail for respect in the Clergy because pretty much everyone but him knew that all his positions and promotions were handed to him.

His pipistrello was the one singular person he never had to second guess his thoughts with.

"What if they talk about that one fuck up I did at this Ritual?"

"I bet they laugh about the word I flubbed in Mass."

"Probably don't actually like me, they're just being nice."

None of that existed around Phantom, and Copia loved that for them both.

But then their forced separation came…

(The rest is below the cut, I said I would yap lol)

In the Ministry, he would do everything he could to see Phantom, even if only for a second as they passed each other in the corridors. During the tours, Copia was on social media every night, waiting for the latest lot of pictures and videos from the shows so he could see Phantom. He was stalking social media for any fans that caught the Ghouls out in the wild too, desperate to see his (albeit glamoured) Bug smiling straight the camera, straight at him.

They were having so much fun, and loving performing. Copia's heart ached at them only getting one tour together.

Something that stabbed Copia straight in the chest though was Phantom's very carefully crafted front. One reason being the fact it had to exist anyway. The other was that niggling voice telling him it wasn't a front, and Phantom was actually perfectly content and happy without him.

Copia knew that voice was bullshit, somewhere deep down inside, but he couldn't shake it. He knew Phantom's exhaustion wasn't from touring or from just a bad night or two, but he couldn't mute those thoughts that told him to get a grip and get over them.

They're not actually your child, they're just a Ghoul. A Ghoul that's not even yours anymore. Terzo was never this attached to Omega, get over yourself! Call yourself Frater and you can't even function without this one Ghoul who doesn't even need you anymore.

Copia knew it was more than just not having Phantom to cuddle with at night. It was the torture of not being able to care for, not being to able to even see your child.

One of the Bishops had a daughter in the convent and they met for lunch nearly every day. Hell, him and Sister Imperator ate together at least once or twice a week! Copia wanted that with Phantom. He wanted it so bad it made his chest hurt.

The only meals he could have with Phantom were Ministry events where they were on opposite sides of the room, with hundreds of people between them.

The handshakes that were all the physical contact they could get meant everything to both of them. They would hold on for a bit longer, a bit tighter, Copia would sometimes hold Phantom's hand with both of his or put the other hand on their forearm.

But, at these events, Copia would see Phantom laughing and smiling with their pack. The sight was glorious, and Copia could never tear his eyes away from them. But, there was also the ache in his chest, and the weight in his head,

"They're fine without you."

After Copia finally won over the slightly-and-skillfully-reformed Clergy, he mulled over sending that text to Phantom for hours. He stared at his screen, typing and deleting and retyping, as he did his best to calm the constant anxiety attack he found himself in. He wondered if this had been yet another one sided relationship where the other person was simply too polite to tell him to "fuck off", they'd taken what they needed from him and left him behind because they didn't need him anymore.

He actually didn't mean to send the text. His thumb was hovering over the screen and he was shaking so much that it just hit 'send'.

When Phantom took a while to come up to his chambers, Copia was pacing and telling himself how stupid he was being. He was Frater, he was grown up and acting like a child. He had switched his phone off and threw it to the other side of his room after he had sent the message. He didn't want to see if he'd been left on read and ignored, or left unopened for hours while Phantom undoubtedly was doing just fine without him.

Obviously, he didn't know that Phantom was running around like a kit on Christmas Day, showing everyone their phone screen and the message, picking out the best pyjamas and blanket and stuffie for the night they'd dreamt of for so long. Then they slowly walked up, keeping their guard up because surely it was a prank?

Copia's heart stopped when he heard the knock on his door. And it started beating again when Phantom pounced through the door and into his arms.

He knew in that moment all his insecurities were silly and cruel tricks from his mind. He knew that the torture that these past two years had been was over for the both of them now his pipistrello, his bambino, was right where they belong again. And if it was up to them, neither would ever leave, ever again.

[kittycatcrackhead]

shane x farmer headcanon

TW: Alcoholism, EDs and body dysmorphia, and mentions of being suicidal.

Here's some headcanon stuff before i get to the depressing shit

Leon is 5'5", and Shane is 5'6" (funnily enough, leon was made to be short because i wanted him to be slightly shorter than shane, and i've always headcanoned shane as 5'6")

Neither one can cook. Leon has literally burnt down his kitchen before.

Leon is 27, and Shane is 34

Leon is horrible with kids, but Shane is surprisingly good with them (it's cause he tries to be a good uncle to jas)

Leon doesn't understand a thing about gridball, but it's fine cause shane loves to ramble and explain it.

Shane is transmasc, and uses he/they pronouns.

Leon uses he/him pronouns.

Shane wears exclusively crocs, even at work. It drives leon insane (he despises crocs).

Leon and Shane are both slobs, and it drives Leon's bodyguard Phillip (who also lives with them) fucking nuts. (phil is a part of their relationship, but i want to focus on leon and shane's dynamic here. i'll eventually make a post about a phil x shane dynamic)

Leon is somehow still a certified accountant (even after getting fired from his last job for accused fraud. he was set up tho), and handles the finances for the farm, and deals with tax stuff. He often rambles about accountant stuff to Shane, who doesn't understand a lick of it.

Leon is allergic to cats, but they still keep a cat around the farm.

Leon's full name is Leonard Valentine Locke. DO NOT call him Leonard, he despises his full name.

^ This is leon :3

^ this is his sdv sprite i made :3 (pixel art is a pain in the ass in procreate btw T_T)

ok sad shit below this, read at your own risk.

So shane has always been a big influence on my oc, Leon (it was mostly subconscious, I didn't realize Leon was so similar to Shane until a couple of months ago)

They're both suicidally depressed and alcoholics, and both struggle with their sense of self-worth.

I believe that Shane drinks because he lost two close friends who meant a lot to him (Jas' parents), and didn't know how to deal with the grief. He'd already had a bit of an issue with alcohol before, but nothing like it would become.

Leon drinks because he had a shit childhood and a shit life. He hates himself, and struggles with major depression. He's on antidepressants, and meds for bipolar 2, which react poorly with the alcohol, worsening his symptoms, and making him heavily suicidal. He always had a problem with alcohol, but it became significantly worse when he shot and killed his father. While it was self-defense, his now boss, Zalu Merriweather, used it against him to get Leon to work for them. That sent Leon into a downward spiral, and he ended up nearly dying multiple times.

He ended up in Stardew Valley with his bodyguard, Phillip, because of some lore thing idk. what happens in stardew valley isn't canon to my story, so i haven't put too much though as to why Leon ends up there lmao

But Leon finds shane, and they are two drunk peas in a pod. They get along well, (perhaps too well), and are both worsening the other's alcoholism, since Shane now has a drinking buddy, and leon thinks shane's hot af, but leon prefers to be drunk when he sleeps with someone.

Then shane's six-heart event rolls around, and leon doesn't want to shane to end up like him. Shane decides he's going to get his shit together.

Leon doesn't get sober yet, tho. He's still drinking and struggling, but with Shane now being sober, he doesn't want to be a bad influence.

Eventually, shane and phil are able to help leon give up alcohol.

Leon gives it up entirely, but Shane is able to have a few beers every now and then.

Leon gains weight after quitting alcohol, and it really fucks with him. He had an ED when he was younger, and has bad body dysmorphia. Seeing his body become "ugly" by his standards almost makes Leon relapse, but he works through it.

[langernameohnebedeutung]

@claw00 Excuses to talk about my crowfriends? Hell yes!

To be clear, this is all based on my field study based on specific 2 crows but my findings so far.

I think it's important to keep in mind that crows are non-domesticated prey animals. And as humans we are enormous compared to them. So they're understandably skittish. (It's a bit like befriending a cat, but with less hissing and more stalking. Seriously. They watch everything. They're a two-winged surveillance apparatus. They will learn everything about you.) But this is also a matter of personality (Omen is a lot more confident than Eggnog, but neither is as confident as one sweet crow I once met who immediately ate straight from my hand. But that one was living right next to Stonehenge and is probably very used to tourists sharing their meals!). Anyway, some tips based on that:

NO SALT! This isn't so much a tip for befriending crows but a tip for when you do it: Treats are obviously the best way to start an interaction with them. Nuts are a good starter, cat food, the occasional egg - they're omnivores and you will find a lot of guidelines online as to what you can feed them and what's healthy for them. There are also some wonderful reddit communities for crowfriends where people share their personal experiences. Peanuts and cashews are a giant hit in my experience. But: A lot of the nuts that you see in the supermarket have insane amounts of salt on them. Because we crave that mineral. Birds cannot metabolise salt at the same rates we can. It's highly toxic for them and can cause neurological damage. So if you buy nuts or seeds for them, make sure that you're buying the unsalted version. Shelled peanuts and bird food from the pet shop are some good ways options to make sure it's healthy. Generally, check the label.

They don't like direct eye contact. Remember, again, we are giant noisy predators with front-facing eyes! A brief moment of eye contact is helpful to indicate that you're "talking" to them and that what you're doing (e.g. placing a treat) is something you're doing for them. But prolonged staring is a thing to build up to. (This doesn't go both ways, by the way. They will stare. It's their favourite hobby)

Some feeding techniques: Throwing food is a good way to communicate very clearly that you are giving food to them. But it also can be scary for them, to see a human throw something in their direction! (imagine a giant walking up to you and throwing a peanut the size of your head at you. You would be worried too) So, small movements and maybe just throwing it in their vague direction, a little to the side or just throwing it halfway is better than throwing it straight at them the way you might to a dog. Or straight up placing it for them in an accessible spot to snatch at their own time (especially early on in the friendship - I also have a little magpie in my orbit at this point but she only takes it in secret. I know she's gaining a small amount of trust because she will sit in my line of sight to ask for food, but she will never let me see her take it. Eggnog was very similar at first. Just because you don't see them take it, doesn't mean that the gift isn't well-received or that you're not building a relationship.

They don't like a rapid descent swooping, most of the time. At first, I would throw food straight below the spot they were sitting in, straight under their tree or the street lamp they were perched on to make it very clear that "yo, here, for you!" But I noticed they would be more hesitant when I did that - and usually, they would hop down in several "steps" to get it (usually finding a slightly lower spot a little to the side and then swoop to the ground. This seems to be less of an issue when they're swooping from higher up - but generally, it seems to be a lot more comfortable if you throw it a few metres to the side so that the descent is less steep). On that matter, they also walk a lot more than you would expect, once they're on the ground,

Being patient. As I said, they're prey animals and they're not domesticated. They might not even really understand what you want from them at first (but they're quick on the uptake and they remember your face). I started befriending my two guys because there is a very sick, very crappy walnut tree in front of my house where they go looking for nuts (which are also small and sickly). I first started feeding them by buying a back of walnuts from the store (really big ones) and placing them under that tree for them (and often cracking them open a little). They started to see me do that and got curious. That's when I started using eye contact to indicate that it was for them - and later I transitioned to feeding them directly and further away from the tree. We got to the point where I could just drop a walnut when I saw them somewhere and they knew it was for them. This also worked better than feeding them peanuts at first (they love peanuts now but at first they didn't even touch them because it was Weird and Strange) or feeding them elsewhere: Find a method that is within their frame of reference. It helped them make sense of what I was doing and from there we extrapolated: I started feeding them further away from that tree and started giving them other things.

Finding a routine! At this point, I have a pretty well-established rapport with my guys - we know where to find each other, what food I have and where I leave it for them when I'm not around, I know exactly how many steps I have to take back for Eggnog to take something (Omen doesn't really care about personal space as much), they know how to get my attention, what times I'm out and what times they go back to their night tree and all that. For some people, there are different routines. On reddit, some people talk about using a whistle to call them, my grandmother used to knock on the roof to call her crow friend back in the day. Some people talk to them to get them used to their voice and establish some expressions they might remember (I do that), some don't talk at all to avoid sounding scary. Some imitate crow noises, some avoid that at all costs. (I also think this depends on the crow. Some seem to react very positively to crow noises. some are scared off by it) But overall, I think the important thing is to remember that crows are some of the smartest animals around. They get used to you. They remember you and your behaviours and what they mean. And you will learn what these specific crows want (they have very unique personalities). So once you're in a "dialogue" with some crows, it's really a bit of a negotiation and you learn about one another - and it's fun! They will tell you how to befriend them, in their own way.

This might be me reading human behaviour into them - but based on crow personalities and the similarities between the way humans and crows think, I do believe that part of the reason they "keep me around" is...because I'm interesting to them. Crows are insanely curious, even if they're shy. I'm a bit of a novelty to them and so are the weird foods I give them. Where else would they get peanuts? One risk in feeding wild animals is that they might become overly dependent on the human doing it or lose their distance. From what I read and witnessed, crows stay pretty well on top of that - they're clever, they know how to procure food in their territory and whatever you feed them is bound to be only a small part of their daily foraging. Sometimes they will be gone for a day or two because they got better stuff to do (someone on reddit once called that "they're out on crow business") and just right now, during nesting season, they're clearly giving me some sort of "courtesy visit" once a day to stay in touch but they do know how to take care of themselves. Sure, I'm also a convenient and reliable food source (and a target for them to extort from) but they're also just straight up curious. So - use that to your advantage: Showing them new foods (make sure they're good for them!) is a good way to learn what they like AND to be interesting to them.

[kestalsblog]

I have some Stanman headcanons for you! Although, this is more going to be me just yapping about it. Lmao sorry. 🙈

1.) Stan is the only person Eric has ever had actual romantic feelings for. All other relationships he's been in have been transactional for him (i.e. what can he get out of this relationship?), but Stan is different. He GENUINELY cares about him and loves him.

2.) Stan would absolutely confess first, and when he does...OOHH BOY. Eric is in a state of pure shock. He doesn't believe it whatsoever, but it's HAPPENING. He's always felt as if Stan was something that was unobtainable. He always thought Stan was way out of his league (poor boy has low self esteem). My goodness, though, he is over the moon when he finally realizes that his love isn't one sided. 🫶

3.) The reason Eric hates Wendy so much is purely because of jealousy. He feels as if Wendy doesn't deserve Stan and doesn't treat him right. Arguably, it could be why he hates Kyle too. Lmao

4.) Eric has been in love with Stan since he remembers being able to feel that way, but Stan's feelings came a little later; shortly after moving to the farm. Eric was the only one who actively visited Stan, and it's a gesture that Stan grew to love him for. I mean, come on, Eric Cartman can force his mom to drive him to see Stan but Kyle, Stan's B.F.F., can't do the same?

The more time they spent alone together, the more Eric let down his walls, which allowed Stan to see a much softer side of his friend. They realized they had a lot more in common than they thought previously and they opened up to each other about things they've never talked about before. That trust and communication is what made Stan develop feelings.

5.) Eric LOVES to show off Stan. He's very proud of having such a beautiful boy on his arm 💕

6.) Eric is PROTECTIVE. If you make Stan cry or hurt him in any way, run. Lock your doors. Leave town.

7.) Shortly after going public together, people constantly asked Stan "why Cartman? What do you see in him?" It pisses him off and he gets defensive, which Eric finds hot af.

8.) This one is obvious. Stan is a bottom, Eric is a top. Lolol

9.) When Eric held Shelly's baby, it did something to Stan. He never thought he was capable of baby fever, but seeing his big scary boyfriend carefully hold a baby made him weak in the knees 🩵

10.) Stan and Eric both have inside jokes and it drives Kyle nuts. He hates it. Mainly because he can't tell if the jokes are at his expense or not (they're not) 😂 They're also scarily telepathic. They know what the other one is thinking and can finish each other's sentences.

Overall, their relationship is extremely healthy. They never fight or argue. The most they'll do is bicker, but it's all with smiles and laughs. Nobody ever believed their relationship would work, and many didn't understand why on Earth they would be together, but they proved everyone wrong. ❤️

I could go on and on about these two but I hope you like my ultra long Stanman babble 🫶

Ommggg 🙈🫶 This is so CUTE!! I'm going to respond to each one because our views of Stanman are so similar 🙈🤣

EDIT: wow, I wrote a ridiculous amount, so I put it below the read more 😳

I looooove this headcanon, and the show supports it! Eric shows SUCH a soft side for his Stan 🥺 I think that's the main thing that made me drift more from Kyman to Stanman. Like, the spice is good, but there needs to be a foundation of trust and support for that to work, and I see that happening more with Stan than with Kyle.

2. I love this too 🙈😍 Poor Eric longs for Stan for soooooo many years that he convinces himself it's never going to happen, and then one day BAM Stan hits him with the sweetest and most vulnerable love confession. Eric's just a mess after that 🥰 And pretty bad at missing the signs LOL.

3. Omg this actually got me to thinking about that episode where Wendy crushes on Cartman and Stan's in disbelief. Like, I wonder if that went on, maybe the jealousy would transfer from Cartman to Wendy. Like he realizes he's upset not because it's Wendy, but because someone else likes Eric 🙈🤭

4. I always headcanon as Kyle just going away some day because he feels like he has the most successful future ahead of him (not that Stan isn't smart, but he has a lot against him). I think even after the farm, as they're growing toward college and afterward - Stan would learn to see more connections to Cartman apart from Kyle. I also am 100% convinced Eric will mature and become a better person no matter what anyone says 😤

5. I LOVVVEE this. 🥰 One of my favorite tropes tbh, someone obsessed with the other's beauty. I kinda want a whole fic like this where he just shows Stan off 😍🙈 Stan would be shy about it though.

6. You do NOT want to be on Eric's bad side. The person who hurts Stan will have a creative death for sure LOL. The only thing that would hold him back, I think, is Stan not wanting to make a scene. (Gonna admit too I'm just obsessed with chronic crying Stan lol)

7. Yesss! 🙌 Even so many fanfic readers kind of LOL at the idea of one of the other characters choosing Cartman, but like ... the guy is super talented and intelligent and just needs time to work through his issues to become better? Stan will help him do that.

8. There is literally NO argument here 🙈🔥 I couldn't write them switched because I can't imagine it ANY other way.

9. I never even thought of this, but that is SO cute 🥺 I can see Stan adding and adding animals to their family until one day Eric is like, "Uhh, are you trying to send me a message here?" 🍼 (I actually think Eric could be a great dad one day. Like anyone who messes with his kid will die 1,000 deaths. He's a good dad in Post Covid!)

10. I think Kyle would be jealous at first 🤣 He's like "how the hell did this happen??" But he does love his friends, so he'll come around and be happy for them later on, just always a little judgmental.

I just typed FOREVER LOL! 🥰🤭🙈 This was a lot of fun to read, so thank you!! I love receiving asks like this, so anyone always feel welcome🥰

As I was typing the tags, I accidentally wrote "Stan Cartman" 🥺💜

[hiatus-xix]

Love I would make an omelette if you do a NSFW alphabet for either one of the Cals. 🍳🍳🍳

LOVE U, LOVE OMLETTES OMDS <33 And ofc you can get an NSFW alphabet for the wonderful CalLUX cuz he's CUTE like fuck, proof:

Cutie. Anyways, here's the alphabet (+ link to KSI and W2S's versions!)

--------------------------

A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex) I think after doing it he wants to make sure you're all okay. He skedaddles to get a damp towel to clean you up and to press to the back of the neck to cool you down.... Also asks a lot to make sure you're physically okay and asks whether he was good enough- almost sounds like he's worried for you, but you know it's just his way of showing love and concern

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner's) Thighs. Love, love, loves your thighs. Loves how they're just so soft and comfy- he's a mix of either wanting to lie his head on your thighs and rest, or wanting his head to be between your thighs with your fingers threaded through his hair

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically) He's so fucking good at giving head- like, it's unbelievable. Headcannon is that after you've cum, he'd lick your thighs and core all over again just to taste your cum- even though your legs were already fucking shaking from post-orgasm overstim

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) One time whilst you were abroad on a girls holiday he felt really horny all day and didn't know what to do... Ended up looking through your insta and pleasuring himself whilst looking at pictures of you. Post-nut clarity he realised how weird he was for doing that and never told anyone (occasionally in conversation he gets a flashback to it and completely blanks out of the convo in sheer horror)

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?) I think w Lux you would've gotten into a relationship quite early on, and did your first times with one another. Pretty much all experience you've had is just with one another, so whilst it was quite awkward and intermittent at first- the two of you are now experienced and know exactly what you're doing with one another

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying) Missionary. He is a LOVE MAKER, and being able to see your face contort with each thrust, be able to lean down and press kisses between your chest and mark up your collarbones that easily is something too good to pass up on for Cal

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.) You two are so comfy in the relationship that yeah, you can joke mid-sex. Whilst he's bottomed out you could look up at him and joke What, did you put it in? and he can say whatever jokes he wants back

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.) I feel like he doesn't have much hair growth as it is, so it's not really chaotic down there. Keeps it clean and shaves if he needs to, he isn't really bothered and neither are you

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect) Quite intimate and loving in the moment. You've done rough sex before whilst you two were really fucking horny, but generally sex with Cal is a lot more personal and intimate + you leave feeling well and truly ♡loved♡

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon) Knows he can't always have sex when he's horny and you're busy, so he tries to wait for you instead of jacking off... but I reckon if he couldn't wait, then he'd have you completely in his mind whilst doing it

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks) PRAISE. I feel like it's a two way street asw. He's one to praise you for how "fucking gorgeous" you are and how "beautiful you look under me"... But he loves being praised too- told he's doing so well and he feels so good... All the praise goes STRAIGHT to his head

L = Location (favorite places to do the do) You know back when Harry, and Cal² lived together in an apartment block, they had a hot tub and gym area on the roof? I reckon that after a long week, you and Cal would go up there to relax, but end up just dogging over (or sometimes in) the tub, surprisingly turned on by the risk-factor of someone just walking up and being able to see the two of you going at it

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going) Cuddling and just being all domestically loving. I think a few little kisses behind his ear, a few hugs from behind and wrapping your legs around his own... It doesn't turn him on per say, just makes him love you and want to develop that chaste kissing into him kissing between your legs whilst you praise him and squeeze your thighs around his head

N = No (something they wouldn't do, turn offs) Age play. First heard about it at a shoot when someone said "He's so old they must have some weird sort of age-play sex life", and Cal hadn't a clue what that meant. After asking, he was mortified at the idea of pretending to be younger or older than himself or you were.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.) Giver. Such a giver because of how much he loves hearing your moans and the way his name sounds rolling off your lips between your whines. And the way he holds your plush thighs with such force he knows they'll bruise- but you still push them together around his head, giving him such pleasurable headrush as he licks between your legs, savouring every fucking moment between your folds

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.) Slow + sensual, if you couldn't have guessed it. There's no rush to make one another cum- he's holding your hand and praising you whilst he thrusts, telling you how perfect you are 

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.) Not really into them- never really has had the need for a quickie. If you two have plans but you can't wait to rip one anothers' clothes on, then you'll scrap the plans- send off a voicenote between pants and rugged breaths that you'll "have to reschedule", or for the others to go without you. If ever you can't make it to nights out because the two of you are too busy fucking before you've even left the flat, Cal will make you send a voicenote apologising whilst he thrusts into you at a punishing pace, leaving you to try and regulate your voice and not fucking moan as you explain to whoever's on the phone. 

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.) That long into the relationships? Yeah, experimenting is alright but it's not all that common for you two. Vanilla's quite satisfying and whilst experimenting is all good, sometimes you just find it gets in the way. 

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?) Tbf I think Cal could go a few rounds, but he's more into making you go more rounds. He's eating you out first, then pushing two of his long fingers into your overstimulated hole and scissoring them to your second orgasm. Chest heaving and words almost whispers between heavy breaths, you're persuaded to go yet another round by his sweet praises and coos, and make it through to the third round- legs twitching and barely able to walk after Cal's antics

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?) You own toys and he's happy with just using a hand for himself. Has used a toy on you before during sex though, and was surprised by how much you liked it... Sometimes if it's lying not too far away, whilst he pounds you he'll hold a vibe to your clit because he knows how much difference it makes for you

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) A little bit, likes to tease you verbally with little maims like "Awh can't you take anymore?" but ends up praising you afterwards anyways because he can't taunt you without telling you how "beautifully fucked-out" you look...

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.) He isn't too loud, a few quiet groans... He mainly goes for dirty-praise talking you instead of making noises. You on the other hand let out moans and tell him how good he feels- but generally neither of you are stupidly loud. You look to keep it in the bedroom where it's only you two hearing one another's noises

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character) Tried phone sex once... Whilst you were on a business trip one night, down on the Isle of Man whilst he was bored and horny in London, he called you to check if you were free. He got his hand, you got your massager, and the two of you got started on yourselves, your high whines and moans music to Cal's ears even if it was through his phone's speakers

X = X-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes) Probs a bit above average and grows when he gets erect to an impressive six-seven inches. Maybe a bit on the less girthy side, but it never fails to leave you feeling completely fucked full.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?) Not very high tbh, he doesn't have a really high sex drive. You have the higher sex drive so whenever your horny he generally just takes it as an opportunity to give you head or fuck you

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) Not interested in sleeping afterwards, probably wants to care for you instead.

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[seafoamreadings]

week of sunday august 27th, 2023

these are written predominantly for the *rising* signs but they are also intuitively "channeled" enough that they should work for any dominant energy you have! (try your sun if you don't know rising, or more advanced readers can try moon, anywhere you have a stellium, etc and see what works best for you!)

aries: if it feels like a bit of a lead weight on your soul all week, that's a saturn thing. this week's full moon in your 12th house is conjunct saturn, so you have a lot of feelings and it can seem like they're dragging you into a viscous horrible fluid by a lead anchor on your feet or concrete shoes. it isn't all as bad as it feels. the way out is to accept it, maybe retreat into a sort of hermit mode, sit with and listen to the emotions. on the other side of the full moon you start to float back up.

taurus: uranus goes retrograde in your sign. more retrograde phenomena are to follow next week. meanwhile also a full moon in pisces suggests a quiet night or two or several at home, even though socializing can be beneficial on ordinary full moons. this is not one. the stereotype that weird things happen and emergency rooms are more busy on full moons has to do with lunar antics like this.

gemini: focus on your home life, your family of origin, and your ancestry this week, especially if you have ancestral wounds or trauma and no one but yourself to heal your lineage. retrograde activity supports you in this work. it's not always fair that you have to do it, but you can heal the past and the future.

cancerians: the pisces full moon is one you can connect to viscerally as a water sign. but be advised it is conjunct saturn within a couple degrees and this can make it feel heavy and mundane compared to ordinary pisces full moons. therefore it likely takes on a melancholy tone and is less energizing for you than you would prefer. yet you're just as psychic and intuitive as ever, if you commit yourself to listening.

leo: you are the only sign i think this week's full moon on saturn REALLY benefits. if you have a magical practice or if you love to manifest, whatever you work on under that auspice gets plunked down into the 3D earth by heavy saturn. if you're not that sort at least launch a project or work on a goal or wish on a star or something!

virgo: a full moon in pisces highlights your relationships. maybe they go a little nuts. maybe YOU go a little nuts. that's okay. saturn keeps things somewhat realistic although if you refuse to see certain truths you may find things get more depressing than they needed to. try to keep your chin up! saturn brings wisdom when you work with him. that can lead to brighter times.

libra: be advised that if you've been neglecting your health in anyway it is likely to force you to deal with it this week due to the full moon conjunct saturn. and if it isn't about health it's about some aspect of your daily life, perhaps something you thought was too boring or ugly to bother about until now.

scorpio: many MANY changes are brewing in your life right now, in almost every facet of it, this week and next. fortunately you're the zodiac's alchemist, no question. don't neglect to turn the lead of this week's saturn vibes into gold, by hook or by crook. life is a spell and you are, certainly for now, the cauldron.

sagittarius: like your opposite sign gemini, you're slated to do ancestor work this week. if you're not typically the family genealogist you may find yourself deep in research or stories about your family's past. some will be good and others not so good. you will see how it affects you psychically, and find ways to heal. for you a bright light is cast on a dark shadow no one has acknowledged in a long time, in your lineage or your earliest years.

capricorn: keep a notebook or something close by this week. the astrology brings you inspirations and brilliant ideas and yet, so saturnine as the week is, if you wait too long to get it out of your head it will become too heavy to extract.

aquarius: retrogrades of your ruling planet are long and in the end just part (almost half) of the texture of life. but the one starting this week is a little unique as it occurs among many other retrogrades. furthermore the moments (days) surrounding the station either direction are typically strange. and by strange i mean not in a gradual way, but lightning bolts of things too serious to be coincidence. at the same time, the full moon in pisces cautions you against irresponsible spending or hiding your values, although it may be tempting.

pisces: a melancholy, saturnine full moon occurs in your sign this week. don't let any depressive episode drag you down, at least as well as you can help it. douse yourself in golden sunlight, and gold jewelry, and you will likely also respond very well to silver, and to music. especially if you can find something upbeat and happy to listen to (or compose!) or at least something catchy.