#these results are so lying cmon

[lipstickontheglass1985]

few more things more annoying in this world than people finding lie detector readings reliable

[lordprettyflackotara]

dollhouse || jeff the killer || part two

SMUT DNI 18+

“You’re fucking insufferable!

“I’m insufferable? Which one of us fucked up the mission?”

“Obviously you!”

You audibly scoffed. The mission had gone perfectly, minus one tiny little flaw. Neither of you anticipated your getaway car being broken into and stolen. It resulted in a very awkward game of hide and seek, where you both were forced to hide behind a dumpster until someone came to get you. (Ben found the situation hilarious).

Unfortunately for both of you, EJ was the one who was ordered to pick you up. The proxies were used to your and Jeff’s bickering, the three often intervening and picking sides. EJ on the other hand was more reserved, always silently observing and thinking. The final piece to the tragic puzzle, were the three days spent tracking down said car to cover your tracks. In recent years Slender had become more insistent on being careful, making sure no traces of creeps were left behind. With EJ’s sense of smell it wasn’t hard to find the thief, just time consuming.

You’d be lying if you said you didn’t enjoy torching the car and watching it be engulfed into flames. What you didn’t enjoy, was quite literally everything else. Including the long car ride back to the mansion, which included both you and Jeff sharing the backseat. Originally you both had fought over the passenger seat, EJ quick to manhandle the both of you into the backseat by force. Now you were forced in a confided space with your arch nemesis, one who had came in you days prior.

“I’m not the one who decided to finger paint blood on the wall. Maybe if we had saved the arts and crafts bullshit we’d still have a fucking car,” You argued. You were both still covered in dry blood, exhausted, and filthy. Every ounce of energy you had left was dedicated to spiting at each other. “EJ are you hearing this shit? The whole go to sleep thing is kinda my thing. Not my fault you weren’t clever enough to come up with a signature,” Jeff debated. EJ sighed, ignoring the both of you as he continued driving down the dimly lit road.

“Yeah I can tell your signature was made when you were fourteen. It screams edgy preteen,” You spat, crossing your arms. You looked out of the window, sick of seeing Jeff’s face. You hated how he made you feel. So angry. So vulnerable. It was like he could see right through you, both of you apart of the same parting glass. “I’m not the one who got horny mid mission,” Jeff grumbled. You shot daggers at him with your firey gaze as you turned your head. “What the fuck did you just say?” You asked. Jeff matched your energy, both of you meeting halfway. “I think you heard me loud and clear doll face,” He snickered.

“I will throw you out of this moving car Jeffrey,” You growled. Jeff came closer, your faces an inch apart. “Yeah? I’d like to see you try-” He began, both of you flying forward against the seats in front of you. EJ had slammed on the brakes, the car coming to a sudden stop in the middle of the road. “Will you two shut the fuck up? You are driving me nuts! Either fuck, get married, or kill each other. Pick one. Or you know what? Fuck it. Maybe do all three. In that order. Just shut the fuck up!” EJ yelled. Jack was never the violent or expressive type, not in your experience. You’d never heard him mumble more than four sentences before.

You picked yourself up off of the floorboard, trying to look proper as you resumed your position in your seat. Jeff did the same, watching as EJ slowly turned back around. He shook his head, slowly pressing his foot on the gas. “We did fuck, just to be clear,” Jeff clarified. You screeched in horror. “Jeff?! What the fuck?” You said, slapping his arm. Jeff rolled his eyes. “Cmon dude it’s fucking EJ. If anyone understands the primal fucking thing it’s him,” He said, pointing at the demon in question. Jack slammed on the brakes once again, your head hitting the seat in front of you this time.

“I’m getting out of the car. Get your energy out by fucking or killing each other, I don’t care which. Just let me know when you’re done,” EJ grumbled, undoing his seatbelt. You reached over the seat and grabbed his arm. You wanted nothing more than to go home and shower. And if you had to shut Jeff up to do it, you would. “We’ll figure it out and leave you out of it. Okay? Please take us home,” You say softly. Out of all of the mansions residents, Jack probably bothered you the least. Most of the time he kept himself wrapped up in his medical lab. You only really saw him when one of the proxies needing stitching up, EJ taking pride in the one thing he considered himself to be good at.

Jack sighed, not saying anything but beginning to drive the car again. “Look at you getting all soft on EJ. You gonna beg him to fuck you too?” Jeff huffed, jealousy radiating off of his skin. You turned to him, climbing over him and straddling his lap. Your hand flew to his throat, squeezing the sides like your life depended on it. “If you keep yapping we are never going to get home. Shut up,” You snarled. You could feel Jeff’s cock grow hard underneath you, your eyebrows raising. “Say please and i’ll shut up,” Jeff said, his voice husky. You couldn’t decide if it was because of his lust or lack of an airway.

You most certainly did not want to say please to Jeff of all people, but you did want to get home. More than anything. You slowly lowered your hips, grinding against Jeff’s aching boner. “Please,” You say softly, meeting his obsidian eyes. The pale killer quickly flipped you over, planting his lips on yours. You could hardly process your back hitting the backseat, the air being knocked out of your lungs. You struggled to keep up with his frantic kisses, as if he just couldn’t get enough of you. His pale hands slipped under your shirt, squeezing your mounds of needy flesh.

You let out a small groan, Jeff’s obsidian eyes temporarily torn away from you. “EJ if I catch you looking back here i’ll scoop out your eyes,” Jeff threatened. There was a brief silence in the car, before Jack turned on his blinker to turn. “I don’t have eyes Jeff,” He replied blandly. Jeff squeezed at your breast harder, the pain making you squirm. “Yeah yeah you get the point,” Jeff barked. He smashed his lips back onto yours, your fingers desperately fiddling with his jeans. “That desperate huh doll?” He snickered. You rolled your eyes, Jeff forcing a groan from your lips as his finger toyed with your nipple.

“Thats it, such pretty noises. Let it all out,” He mocked. He helped you shove off his jeans, his hand grasping his hard cock. Jeff buried his head in your neck, sucking and lapping at your sensitive skin. The two of you were whimpering messes, completely forgetting Jack was even there. “Don’t leave marks you asshole,” You whined, your hips rolling upwards. Jeff grinned devilishly as he released your neck with a pop. “Little too late. Good luck explaining that,” He argued. You ran your thumb over his slit, the pale killer above letting out a groan. You grabbed him by his hoodie, changing the position.

Jeff sat upwards in the backseat, watching as you scrubbed your blood soaked scrubs off. You straddled Jeff, melting into the kiss as his large hands grabbed your ass. You hated how good he made you feel. His wet you got from his touch and degrading words. How divine it felt that your slick was rubbing up and down his hard cock, and all you could want was more. He slapped your ass harshly, your whine quickly swallowed by his eager lips. You hovered over his cock, before slowly sinking down onto it. You let out a string of curses, a cocky smirk dancing across Jeff’s lips.

“Go on, let EJ know how good I made you feel,” Jeff purred. Your right hand flew to his neck, choking the sides as you sank down lower onto his cock. “Shut the fuck up Jeffrey,” You argued weakly. Your walls spasmed as you struggled to accommodate his size, your drenched cunt pulling him in. Jeff’s eyes rolled into the back of his head as you choked him, the pale killer in more pleasure than he’d let on. “Look at Jeff EJ, look at how much of a pathetic fucktoy he is for me,” You huffed. You sank fully into his cock, the two of you breathing heavily as you finally made eye contact. Jeff’s hand brought itself to your throat, the two of you choking the other.

“Get on with it or i’ll bend you over and give Jacky a real show,” Jeff threatened weakly. You rose your hips, before rolling them back down on his cock. You both let out a unison of groans, your body beginning to ride his shaft faster. You released his throat, grabbing handfuls of his hoodie to maintain balance. “F-fuck Jeff,” You whined. His cock was abusing your g spot perfectly, your body on cloud nine. Jeff released your throat, bringing his large hand to your cheek. “Thats it doll, keep making that stupid fucked out face of yours,” He huffed. His other hand strayed from your ass, slithering to your clit. He began to draw slow circles, your brain turning to mush.

“Fucking hell- please go faster,” You pleaded. Jeff brought his forehead to yours, the two of you moaning in unison as you shamelessly rode his cock. Your knuckles were turning white from gripping his hoodie so hard. It was then the killer began fucking up into you, your moans becoming louder and unhinged. “Jeff! Shit!” You moaned. Jeff stroked your cheek with his thumb, the loving action almost making you furrow your eyebrows in questioning. But he seemed content and you couldn’t deny your enjoyment. “I hate you Jeffrey Woods,” You hissed, hating the way your body was reacting to his.

“I hate you more dollface,” He seethed, both of his hands grabbing your waist. Jeff gripped your waist so tightly you knew you’d have bruises in the morning. “I hate the air you breathe,” You argued. Jeff’s thrust into you, knocking your next insult out of your lungs. “Yeah? I hate how good you feel wrapped around my cock,” Jeff panted. You could feel the cord in your stomach tightening, your thighs beginning to shake. You brought your fingers down to your clit, circling the sensitive bud as Jeff rammed into you. “I hate you,” You moaned, throwing your head back in pleasure.

Jeff grabbed your throat, forcing you to look at him as you both reached your highs. “I hate you too, slut,” He spat. His words sent you over the edge, your walls spasming around his cock as you came. “Jesus fuck, it’s like you’re milking me,” He groaned, cumming deep inside of your cunt. You both panted in unison, trying to come down from your highs. Exhausted, you rested your head against Jeff’s shoulder.

Jacks voice was the next thing you heard as you came down, “You two need fucking therapy.”

[valsverse]

𝐞𝐝𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐞 𝐡𝐜'𝐬

summary. headcanons of your relationship with edmund pevensie while dating. (gn reader)

— straight up fluff, nothing else. PART 1/?

— Edmund leaves little notes everywhere. In the pages of your books, the pockets of your pants, etc. Usually they just consist of sweet words and reminders to eat and take care of yourself as a much needed endorphin boost. He always makes sure to fill up the entire piece of paper, front and back until there's no space to write any more loving words. — Random "I love you"s throughout the day for no particular reason. — Playful arguments over the most miniscule things, I mean seriously, the two of you bicker like a married couple. Edmund can be quite argumentative, but not in the way you expect. No, usually you quarrel over the correct way to toast a piece of bread, topics such as that. None of it is serious of course, nine times out of ten it turns into a tickle fight that ends with a cuddle session anyway. — Edmund naturally smiles excessively around you. He doesn't really think about it, it just happens. Like this guy literally GLOWS when he sees you, it's not even funny. When you look at him, he smiles. When you rant, he smiles. When you talk about your interests, he smiles. No matter where the two of you are and what you're doing, he's always grinning around you, both of you in your own world. — Even though Edmund is one of the most renowned swordsman in Narnia, that doesn't mean he's immune to the occasional injury. And so, you have to tend to his wounds quite often. Sometimes you end up scolding him if the wound was the result of reckless actions and impulsive behavior, and yes he appreciates the concern, but he just thinks it's cute how your lips form into a pout whenever he comes back with a new injury to tend to. He adores how much you care for him, even if it's just through small actions. — Absolute SUCKER for when you kiss his scars. Edmund used to see his scars as a nuisance, only there to remind him of the treacheries of war and danger. But of course, life has different perspectives for different people. So when you came around, reassuring him that his blemishes were a sign of his bravery and strength from the pain he endured, he felt like he was going to cry. And the second your lips came in contact with a particular scar just shy of his collarbone, he immediately felt comfort and a sense of safety wash over him. Maybe it was the warmth of your lips, or the alleviation of your words, whatever it was, it made him feel like maybe everything was going to be okay. — Kisses on the nape and shoulder. (goes both ways) — Since we're on the topic of kissing, Edmund has a thing for tracing your jawline before or while the two of you are kissing, or just sharing an intimate moment in general. He prefers to rest one hand on the curve of your hip, and the other hand caressing your jaw, no matter what the position is. He also enjoys trailing little pecks from the side of your neck to the corner of your lips before he finally presses his lips against yours. — Chess dates!! Yeah, it doesn't sound like the most romantic activity but, cmon, it's Edmund Pevensie. He'll find a way to make it memorable. And while he loves a fair match, (who doesn't?) sometimes he just so happens to "accidentally" put his king in danger and — oh will you look at that, you won. Yeah, maybe he changed up his moves a little so you would win, but it's all worth it to him. He adores the sight of your eyes lighting up, and how you throw your hands up in triumph and shout in glee. While you're busy celebrating, he gazes at you fondly with an impossibly soft look in his eyes. One of his hands is lying on his cheek, supporting his head, while his other hand still remains on his king. Even though he "lost", his smile is wide as ever because as long as you're happy, he's happy.

— On days when he's not busy with training or just occupied with the responsibilities that come with being one of the kings of Narnia, picnic dates are a must. He cooks up your favorite meals and packs them up in a picnic box along with the traditional red and white checkered blanket, and off you go. It's kind of just a de-stresser for him. Quality time with you and a home cooked meal to go along with it. Sometimes he brings you to brings you to picturesque flower fields, or the patch of green grass directly in front of the river front. No matter where it is, Edmund has his reasons for why he chose those specific locations. They always remind him of you. The two of you watch the sun slowly disappear under the horizon as you both lay on the checkered blanket, with your head resting on his chest and his arm lazily wrapped around your waist, it looks just like a scene straight out of a fairytale.

— On days when he's not busy with training or just occupied with the responsibilities that come with being one of the kings of Narnia, picnic dates are a must. He cooks up your favorite meals and packs them up in a picnic box along with the traditional red and white checkered blanket, and off you go. It's kind of just a de-stresser for him. Quality time with you and a home cooked meal to go along with it. Sometimes he brings you to brings you to picturesque flower fields, or the patch of green grass directly in front of the river front. No matter where it is, Edmund has his reasons for why he chose those specific locations. They always remind him of you. The two of you watch the sun slowly disappear under the horizon as you both lay on the checkered blanket, with your head resting on his chest and his arm lazily wrapped around your waist, it looks just like a scene straight out of a fairytale. — Edmund is always eager to prove his love and devotion to you. He's deeply committed to you, and loves to declare it proudly. Sometimes he writes short poems about you, recounting his favorite moments the two of you shared. He describes the way your hair blows in the wind while the two of you are horseback riding, or how your smile is one of his favorite sights, he writes about anything regarding you. He just pours out his feelings onto a piece of paper. And when the stack of poetry about you piles up too high on his desk, he ties it up neatly in a ribbon and places it on your bedside table for you to wake up to. (CHIVALRY IS NOT DEAD GUYS 🗣️🗣️ ) — Edmund has a thing for kissing your hand. Like not even as a greeting, just in general. He just thinks of it as another way of showing his love and admiration for you. He brushes his lips against your palm and trails kisses up your fingertips, like HELLO??? — All in all, your relationship with Edmund Pevensie is truly one of a kind. ∙ u guys i know i havent posted a proper story since like may, and honestly i have no excuse i was just being lazy af. also my love for edmund has kind of faded but i started writing this months ago and decided i might as well finish it. ∙ so next time i post, it probably won't be edmund pevensie related, OR MAYBE IT WILL!! i still have many ideas (don't unfollow me pls im sorry LMAO) ∙ until next time, (and trust me, there will be a next time.) xx valerie.

[aggro-my-beloved]

Asher + Babe HC’s

＊ after their first meeting, asher volunteered himself to do any and all miscellaneous errands involving paperwork and notarization if it meant going back to baabe’s place of work so he could chance running into them again

＊ they even timed each other’s schedules in order to squeeze in tens of lunch dates through the week before making anything official. one thing that took baabe by surprise during these rendezvous, though, was the same request asher gave to each waiter/waitress.

＊ baabe supposed hot sauce wasn’t that odd of a condiment to put on his burger, but amidst their fourth date when he was loading it on top of his mashed potatoes, they had questions.

＊ asher has grave mouth. his tastebuds are basically useless from all the sour candy he consumed as a child/teen. he can drink lemon juice straight without puckering. this info shut baabe right up, but left them satisfied.

＊ to ensure his meals aren’t entirely bland, he puts hot sauce on almost everything he eats. this has led to some questionable, if not disgusting combinations he has sworn against—including, but not limited to sriracha-topped waffles and red hot chocolate

＊ the pack beta also likes to skateboard, baabe disovered. cmon, they live in california—it was between skating and surfing and this man burns too easy at the beach. his mate would be lying if they said they didn’t admire his freckled face from time to time, though.

＊ give him a shovel on malibu’s finest sand though? he’d dig a hole so big it’d be considered a safety hazard. and he did, the one time he and baabe went on their shared day off. the lifeguard had to come and stop him, urging baabe to glance up from their magazine and gape at the trench a dangerous proximity from their beach chair.

＊ once they did leave, asher was sulking about how he could’ve made the hole so much bigger and deeper (hehehe) had he been shifted and able to use his paws and let primal instinct kick in. baabe consoled him with ice cream and an aloe massage later on, promising they’d try for a private beach and a higher spf sunscreen the next time around

＊ long-haired babe’s go to hairstyle is space burns. asher adores the style on them so much he asked for them to do the same to his hair. it didn’t turn out similar in the slightest (more like two tiny pigtails sticking out lopsided atop his head) but he was happy with the results and that’s all that mattered.

＊ “hell yeah, baaabe! you can’t even tell us apart!”

＊ the only way baaabe can remember to practice self-care is when asher reminds them. sometimes he’ll point out a soothing face mask in the store’s cosmetic aisle or run them a hot bath, but the only way for baaabe to fully indulge is if they offer asher to join them in the activity. and he always says yes, otherwise the task will be long forgotten on his mate’s part. and asher would be caught in a lie to say he didn’t want to see how that one bath bomb in particular fizzled out into the water.

＊ when the weather starts cooling down in the fall, asher likes to take walks in his wolf form. so baaabe can join him in public, they modified his spiked choker to act as a dog collar that baaabe can add a leash to, so no unempowered humans get suspicious at the sight of him. that’s right. asher is babe’s scary dog privelage.

＊ he gets a little too eager and excited on these walks though, best believe he’s pulling his mate down the sidewalk 90263692634962692 mph to take in everything while baabe tries not to stagger or fall flat on their face

＊ after several failed attempts at this, they repurpose ash’s skateboard as a mode of transportation for baabe to safely ride on as asher pulls them down the sidewalk. a much better solution than their twelve-year old heelies shoes that were falling apart at the seams.

＊ asher and baaabe are the only couple in the pack that collectively like horror movies/games/media. the only exception for baabe is haunted houses, which both discovered one fateful october at Dahlia’s local amusement park. one of the scare actors frightened baabe so badly, they left with a broken nose, and baabe with a bruised set of knuckles on their right hand.

＊ asher was quick to comfort them during the embarrassing ordeal, but just as quick to laugh and tease them about it later on. he’d be saying shit about how “you should’ve dressed as rocky with an uppercut like that”

＊ once they did leave, baabe sulked, arguing that “zombies are a different type of scary than werewolves and vampires—it was all self defense!” asher consoled them with ice cream later, promising no more haunted houses in the future for the sake of baabe’s hands and innocent workers’ noses alike.

〈 TLDR: baaabe and asher are adorkably sweet together and both love ice cream 〉

[jungaji]

3:16AM

cw: drunk haechan, fluff (lie), angst

you found donghyuck swaying on the sidewalk, his head drooping slightly, a lopsided smile breaking through his otherwise spent expression. his usually bright eyes held a dreamy haze—the result of a few too many drinks.

with one arm around his waist, he leaned his head on your shoulder, soft breaths brushing against your neck as you walked him home, the quiet intimacy stirring a familiar warmth inside you.

once home, you guided him to the couch, where he slumped back, eyes blurry and unfocused.

you sat next to him, coaxing him to drink some water. "cmon, just a little," you murmured, holding the glass to his lips.

he managed a few sips, before looking up, meeting your eyes with a mischievous glint. "you're always s'good to me," he mumbled, voice thick with sleepiness.

you smiled softly, giggling at his intoxicated state. "who else if not me to take care of you?" you replied, gently brushing the hair from his face.

you traced your fingers over his features, admiring the constellation of beauty marks on his face that trailed down to his neck. he leaned into your touch, eyes fluttering shut as he mumbled, "mm, wanna go to bed."

you nodded, taking his hand to help him up, gently leading him through the dim hallway toward your shared bedroom.

as soon as you reached, he let go of your hand and collapsed onto the bed heavily, sighing deeply as he sank into the mattress.

you giggled at the sight before carefully lifting each of his feet, slipping his shoes off as his arms stretched out, reaching for something. you took this as a sign to hold his hand once more, giving it a light squeeze.

"baby," he slurred, his voice soft and sleepy, his fingers curling around yours. "you're my favourite person ever, y'know that?"

a faint smile tugged at your lips, your heart warming at his words. "yes, yes. get some sleep, hyuckie," you whisper, tucking the blanket around him.

he looked so peaceful, lying there with his eyes barely open, a lazy smile playing on his lips as he stared at you like you were his whole world.

as his eyes closed, snuggling deeper into the comforter, he murmured, "i love you, __."

you froze.

the words hung in the air, heavy and fragile, the warmth in your chest turning cold as you realised—

that isn't your name.

your heart seemed to stop for a second, and the subsequent silence was filled with the steady, gentle sound of his breathing. he was asleep before you could even respond, his hand still loosely holding onto yours, unburdened by the words he'd just said.

you pursed your lips in an attempt to swallow back the tears that threatened to fall. smoothing the blanket over him, you leaned forward to press a gentle kiss to his forehead.

"i love you too," you whispered, the words aching as you pulled away.

authors note: this was looowkey inspired by tonight (i wish i was your boy) by the 1975 !!! (thank you myungie for proofreading)

[vctrvn-ls]

Being Sick |Beta Squad|

yeah im sick, v sad but #not3ambutsickthoughts

nice and short

「 ✦ Chunkz✦ 」

Would pull out any and every trick his mom did in his youth when he was sick. He’d tell you all about Somalian herbs, plants and how they’re good for you. For example Pelargonium and the boost it gives to your immune system. I don’t really see Chunkz as the “I’ll get off work just to take care of you” typa guy, like don’t get me wrong he’d be worried as hell but he’s too much of a busy man to drop everything, and you’d respect that because as soon as he got home all of his attention would be on you and you only, baby. Besides he believes that the best cure is a good rest (I feel like I know that for a fact)

「 ✦AJ ✦ 」

Now AJ thinks the best cure is laughter. He knows how boring it could be, staying at home for a week and lying in bed all day, so he’d try and make your days less miserable. He wouldn’t change too much, he’d still violate you and bully you, saying stuff like “you’re the only one who got sick, loser” but at the same time he’d be bringing you your medicine, food and whatever else you needed. He’d definitely feel bad at first, but as soon as you start getting better he will not hesitate to annoy you again. Honestly AJ would be around you so much that your body would fight off the disease faster just so you could get out of the house. Lovingly tho cause AJ is the best <3

「 ✦Kenny ✦ 」

Gosh where do I start? The fuss this guy would make!! First when he finds out that you’re sick he’d lecture you like a mom. “Didn’t I tell you to dress warmer?” , “Why’d you have ice cold drinks if you already had a sore throat?” , “Why didn’t you tell me straight away that you were sick?” He’d walk up and down the room waving his hands around while you sat there with a guilty look on your face. But you know he’s mad only because he cares that much for you, and it’s not long before he apologizes for acting pissed and starts running around you, bringing every type of medicine he could think of. He’d order your favorite take out, get you a warm beverage and turn on a movie for the two of you to enjoy before you dozed off to sleep on his shoulder.

「 ✦Niko ✦ 」

Yeah he’d drop everything he’s doing for you and make sure you are well before continuing on with his life. First thing he’d do is call in a nurse, and after that buy everything the nurse suggests. He might even go a little over the top with the buying. Medicine aside, he’d make sure youre happy and aware that he’s ready to do anything you need. Like cmon Niko is the most SELFLESS man on this planet, he’d actually be ready to do anything!! He’d sleep next to you, just in case you woke up at night feeling unwell, but he wouldnt sleep too close since he wouldn’t want to get sick as well, which would result in him not being able to help you get well as much as he would want to.

「 ✦ Sharky ✦ 」

Girl he’d do the opposite of Niko and literally have you in his embrace every second (unless you feeling like you need some alone time) He’d make chicken soup and as shitty as it might actually taste, you’d still eat it because he made it with aaallll his love. When you’re napping, he’d be beside you editing his videos (in headphones of course) or he’d be replying to emails and whatever else work related. Would he care that your sick? NO! KISSES EVERY DAY AND NIGHT!

“Sharks you’re gonna get sick!” You giggle and try push him away from you. “Nahh.” He’d shake his head before sprinkling your face with kisses. With all his love and support, you’ll be getting well in no time.

[theprinceandthewitch]

Look Im not going to say that Alador's and Amity's relationship was retconned in Reaching Out, because ya know, I wasnt in the writing room when this episode was being written. But I think their relationship got retconned specifically so Amity wouldn't break-up with Luz. Because this show tries very, very hard to make sure Luz doesn't receive consequences for making mistakes AND it tries to make you believe Luz's behavior is acceptable.

Say what you will about Alador being an abuse victim - I just never saw him as one before COTH because in Understanding Willow, Alador and Odalia are presented as shadow figures towering over Amity. Both of them make it clear to Amity that they dont want her to be friends with Willow. If Alador was intended to be an abuse victim, then it was a mistake to present him as a towering shadow figure in Understanding Willow. It should have just been Odalia in this memory and not both of them.

But going back to Reaching Out - Luz suffers no consequences for lying to Amity because it turns out Alador is totally NOT abusive teehee. Thanks to Luz LYING to her girlfriends face, Amity was actually able to come to an understanding with her totally not abusive father. Like... cmon... do I really need to explain why this is bad?

Alador has not been presented as anything other than an emotionally negligent father who goes along with Odalia's plans. Even in Reaching Out he brushes off Amity's attempt to connect with him.

So you'd think Luz would face consequences for unintentionally alerting one of Amity's abusive parents. Nope! Luz will face no consequences for lying to her girlfriend because it turns out Alador ISNT abusive. Amity and Alador just needed a little push to get them to talk to each other. And they had this moment as a direct result of Luz being emotionally closed off from Amity.

Oh right and just so Luz can avoid even more consequences they made sure Reaching Out took place on the same day as the anniversary of Manny's death. Just to make sure the audience feels sorry enough for Luz that they completely forget she lied to Amity and was emotionally closed off to her through the whole episode. Sure, Luz may have LIED to Amity's face with the direct result being Amity confronting one of her abusive parents. But it's fiiiiine dont worry everyone, because Alador isnt actually abusive.

Like... HELLO???

[theelderscrotes]

ok since i now show up in tags again and i can annoy everybody in them i'm going to repost, trim and add onto my collection of heimdall headcanons and chuck them at the fandom with all of my strength. i have so many thoughts, i am rotating this twink in my mind FULL fucking speed.

-seeing the potential outcomes of events? reading peoples intentions and seeing the potential end result of them? supernatural levels of perception? hearing everyone's thoughts all the time forever? oh this guy has to have TURBO anxiety, i know this in my soul. he's bottled it the hell up and will never let anyone onto it but he's a stiff breeze away from a breakdown at all times.

-ragnarok looming in the distance makes his divinely weaponized super anxiety even more fun because now he's constantly thinking about the apocalypse. losing his shit whenever atreus is in the room is at least partially because he genuinely gets a flash of new, exciting outcomes featuring his family dying and his home burning to the ground.

-odin simply does not care about this, calls heimdall a worrywart and tells him to stop being so negative all the time. odin taking 'loki' under his wing exacerbates the Looming Horrible Dread heimdall is already inundated with, but now it also comes with a dose of daddy issues.

-actually the more i think about it maybe he was kinda valid for being like 'fuck this kid in particular', but like, cmon dude.

-being 'the guy who carries the horn that heralds the apocalypse' does not help any of these matters. he dreads having to use it, and dreads even more the possibility of someone else using it. he has to always have the gjallarhorn on his person at all times or he Will freak out.

-he can't turn off the mindreading, and occasionally forgets which is people thinking and which is people talking. he tends to respond to thoughts more than actual spoken words when he's impatient, and will ask questions aloud for context for people's thoughts out of the blue. great for quiet/nonverbal people, annoying as fuck for everyone else.

-the burden of his powers just in general makes socializing a nightmare, so he turns everyone away by his secondary divine power: being an absolute massive cunt. being comfortable in knowing you're despised by everybody is more tolerable than worrying about who is going to betray you or harbor hatred for you amongst your loved ones. so, he doesnt have any. loved ones, that is.

-heimdall can tell when anyone is lying but, he cannot lie himself. absolutely dogshit liar. you ask him if he took the last slice of pie, he locks up and stares at you like a deer in the headlights before finally saying ’… no?’ odin's.... discipline contributes to this.

-odin contributes, enables and exacerbates a lot of his issues, primarily because when applied correctly heimdall's abilities can be extremely fucking useful, but if they're ever used on odin its all over. putting the fear of the all-father into the boy at a young age to make sure he never, ever looks into his father's mind was step one on the agenda of making him into the perfect little aesirpilled bootlicker

-the immense amount of trust odin places on heimdall, of course, keeps him up at night. being convinced utterly that it's genuine and based in love is about the only thing he's got going for him.

-he is certain that the moment he blows the gjallarhorn, he'll stop being useful. also the whole, apocalyptic super-war does not make him want to blow it any time soon.

-he looks the most like a younger odin out of his siblings (because as we all know, odin is also an ephemerally beautiful femboy god), but he is cursed (blessed?) to be the only one of his brothers to receive odin’s balding genes.

-heimdall is the type of guy who brags about how well behaved and loyal his dog giant cat steed is because he abuses the fuck out of them as 'discipline', but this is definitely also an odin-caused behavior. he genuinely does not know how to treat them any other way, this is the 'correct' way to him.

-im sorry fanartists but i respectfully disagree, i sincerely doubt this guy willingly gets tattoos. subjecting himself to pain he can't avoid, not matter how mild? no thank you! but i like to think he has like one tiny rune because thats as far as the tattoo artist could get before a soft, young heimdall begged for them to stop

-for as much as i am making him as sad and wet and pathetic as i possibly can, he's still just a massive cunt no matter how you slice it. he loves being a mean little bitch and getting away with it. he loves pushing buttons and receiving negative attention through his behavior. he walks down the street and dodges every rotten tomato, knife or rock being flung at him and he is having a blast.

-the quickest way to his heart would be to take his awfulness unflinchingly and be an asshole right back at him. he wants someone he can be mean with but like, affectionately, but his feelings and how he processes them are so severely messed up that, well. it probably isnt worth it, for either him or anyone else.

[rosewoodconch]

RWCH Readathon Days 13-14?

Undercover Princess: Ch. 40-45

Mega liveblog

Ill be honest. I'm really ill: but i am on a bus for 2 hours. So: heres a really porrly written summary of like... the lead up to the ball

Ch. 40

"Promise you'll also be happy"

Well...

Shes happy sometimes?

I really like that again we see that question of jamies origin which doesnt seem so important until youve read everything else

Ill be honest, i usually skip the valentines day bits

Lola is an icon, shes right. Jamie not liking cupcakes is blasphemous

And ellie getting lottle the flowers her name was named for is really sweet and i miss this era of them when it was so easy to fix

Also that note is so incredibly stupid and yes its a threat but also imagine jamie in his room making up the rhyme

"They might take ellie away" GIRL YOUR JOB IS TO PROTECT HER NOT TO KEEP HER FOREVER. Go read the diary again cmon

Ch. 41

Exams! The ball! Finally we hear more about the ball. Its crazy that they get results that quickly

Lottie having nightmares about failing her exams is... oh this poor girl

Shoutout to angus the most scottish person here i love him

Binah is so funny. I absolutely hated people who reacted like that in school

I'm so proud of Lottie like genuinely because after all of the chaos, shes still done incredibly

I was that one sobbing ivy girl ngl. I litterally appealed my b in nat 5 physics because i was convined i deserved a A. I didnt

Ollies messages was so sweet. I missed him so much. He deserves so so so much better. I wish he was able to know things but hes so right to be concerned and hurt. Then "have a good life"

Heartbreaking

Ch. 42

DRESS SHOPPING i probably dont have many thoughts other than OMG DRESSES AND SHOES so sorry in advance

Lèon is an icon and i love him

"I never like to be predictable" YES LOTTIE HARNASS THE SASS

Hes so real with the day and night hes all of us

I really wish ellie got to wear a suit here, it wouldve contrasted so perfectly to the book 5 ball

THE SHOES OH MY GOD THE SHOES

Ellie telling jamie to "just leave" is such a horrible awful thing to have said knowing all we know on reread.

Ch. 43

Jamie lore

I like that we get this explanation before the ball. Because rereading we can see how much the "normal" route relates to ani and saskia and it makes us wonder about who else could be

Jamie is different

The fake story of Hirana, and all of the information about her being lied about not just to ellie, but to jamie too, is so so sad.

Ellie wants nothing but Jamie and her to have normal lives. For them to not be connected in this way. "Everyone should get to choose"

I really love that thats echoed in the ending of the series.

Ugh again with the trust. How often do we hear them go we need to trust each other then lottie hides more stuff again. Im tired lottie.

The Cinderella moment 😭😭😭😭

Ch. 44

Let it be known that in the audiobook connie says Queen Matilda

Her "Real Room" makes me so so happy and i cannot wait to eventually read about it again.

In fact does Lottie ever see it!??!?!?! Someone tell me

See this is what i mean about the trust thing.

Im sorry but if a girl i had a crush on pinned me against the wall, said to tell her a secret or shed bite me i think id pass out

"Youll be mad at me" well no shit sherlock

Jamie is an icon and i love him. Never change

Ch. 45

"I cant promise not to be mad, but I'll hear you out" is so eloquent and I'll always have that in my mind

Creepily similar? A resemblance perhaps?

Ellie lying to try and help lottie is sweet but scary. Because how often does she do this?

I really do think that underneath he is pained for lying to his queen. But not just because hes loyal to her, or that it is his job, but also the queen is nurturing and kind and i think he does internalise that

Lottie defending herself to jamie is so painful

I love the difference between jamie "acting pained" and then the following

For anyone who isn't using the audiobook, i want you to understand how terrifying it is when it switches pov here. Because the whole book has been connie, for the prologue was her mum.

But here, theres a male voice. Jamies va.

Jamie recognising all the palace staff is really sweet

The fact that he has such a routine, hes been trained to hide his emotions from everyone including himself.

And the simple sentence of "he broke down" honestly cuts deeper than if it had been fully elaborated. Its so simple. And thats why its so powerful. He cant even cry and feel comfort. He has to retreat away from everyone and everything

Next chapters are the ball and everything so I'll probably do another mega liveblog for those ones!

Its just easier when I'm ill to group them like this!

[2dkapsddr]

October 20th, 2024 - CHUNITHM, ProSeka, maimai, Arcaea, Rhythm Heaven

iiit's that time of (bi)week again!!!! i know, i know, i already went yesterday and had no business going to an arcade Again for such a long time . but like, cmon, it was all the games that i hadn't had the chance to play at all in the past two weeks!!! i NEEDED to check it out!!! and so, with some notes taken and breakfast picked up from somewhere entirely different, i pulled up to the ultimate gamer zone and GAMED . i unfortunately(?) didn't play as much chunithm as i'd expected to play (though i've already played a ton in the past tbf), but i got a nice FC on JET [ULTIMA 13+] (even though it was a downscore) and also got this pretty clean good score on NEO [Append Lv.32] before it was time for the main stage to take over...

this main stage i'm talking about? why, it's none other than MAIMAI DX!!!! been ages since i got to play, and i even purposefully showed up early to skip the line and get some more action on the cab more consistently... and that's exactly what happened!!! line was short, track count was still pretty small, but the banger plays began from set one... with a sightread FC on Hatsune Miku no Gekishou [EXPERT Lv.12]!!!! i followed it right up with a very good(?) score on Rhythm Sense Test [MASTER Lv.12], but right after that came a very rocky and demotivating chain of scores with super complex charts where i had no idea what i was doing half the time... i should probably expect this given it's maimai -- a game i have no consistent access to and no way to practice at home -- but as good of a rank as AA is in BEMANI games like beatmania IIDX, they felt like ultra disappointing results here in maimai...

took a break from the action to do some arcaea community server challenges on my phone in the maimai queue... they're not very impressive scores (not even upscores, for that matter), but gotta include them for the sake of the account purpose regardless!

kicked off maimai time once again, where the track limit was upped to 3 as the line was way shorter than expected!!! the poor plays didn't stop there though, and i was once again subject to the horrors and struggles of maimai master tech that i just couldn't comprehend... until something incredible happened!! i got an S+ on Liar Dancer [EXPERT Lv.10+]!! and i had INSANE fun dancing along to the BGA!!! i think that alone kickstarted something inside me, as my inner rhythm gaming demon felt like it kicked in and started actually giving me good scores like never before!!! i couldn't believe it... even besides the scores, i was actually reading and executing the tech properly and getting better!!!!!! i even reached 7k rating (red border) thanks to a 96% AAA on INTERNET YAMERO [MASTER Lv.11+]!!!!!!! ...ignore that Slow-downer score though, that one was rough,,,,

switched to Rhythm Heaven AC while taking a break and doing some homework!! i may or may not be cracked at it... not really actually, but two perfects ain't that bad !

continued with a few more final sets of maimai before i had to go since i was starving and there was no food available... the scores you're seeing are fairly rocky and inconsistent, but TO BE FAIR: the first song's chart was quite bad #tbh . no matter though, because right before i had to go... i made up for it with all the banger scores on my last set!!! like that SS+ on Odo [MASTER Lv.11], S+ on HANIPAGANDA [EXPERT Lv.11], and an insane(ly fun) sightread AAA on Seishun Complex [MASTER Lv.11+]!!!! lost more charts i can practice and upscore the next time i come... excited to see what my futuremai holds for me!!!!!! 'til next time though, i'll keep training everywhere else!!!!

[vaugarde]

ok i kinda ate shit w this one, part 4 does have a fair amount of actual mega evolutions we havent seen in the show do much yet. so my updated thoughts on the specials

-theyre kinda forgettable despite being really important but part 4 is the best one

-the moment where chespie saves zygarde and falls into a coma as a result was easily the most engaging part and im glad they finally had a moment where the chespin line does something important and isnt treated as a joke or just nothing. and yet it still gets into a coma so.

-also i like the implication that lysandre keeps chespie in his own lab (when hes the indirect cause of its coma) and using his own authority of power and charisma to cover up what hes been doing. thats so fucked up and in line with whats hes like as a villain and him using this to keep alain in check is all the more engaging. (tho maybe if lysandre was holding alains position in team flare over chespies health thatd be more tense. like cmon we know hes the villain, but ig hes a twist villain in the game so he ought to stay like that in the anime)

-the animation fucks really hard so thats cool

-im sorry but i still dont buy alain and mairin’s friendship or alain as a character . theyve barely had any moments where they just bond because alains mostly fighting w mairin cheering. so the moments where hes like “i am ABANDONING YOU and YOU SUCK!!!!!! (i am lying to protect you)” come out of nowhere bc yeah, so fair mairin really is just the kid following him around. mairin has not done anything to give him a different worldview or gain appreciation for pokemon, we still dont know why he’s apparently this aloof distant guy who cant have friends besides “he has to be stronger” besides maybe lysandre telling him that? except i dont even think lysandre objects to mairin hanging out so like literally what is alains deal besides “if he looks calm and collected and edgy enough that immediately means hes well written and engaging”

also this trainer design FUCKS

should probably wait til i actually start and finish this last special, but for a spinoff called “mega evolution specials” there sure isnt a whole lot of mega evolution

[fairyfuyu]

that night | baji keisuke

summary: aged up characters +20, enemies to lovers w/ baji, reader is siblings w/ chifuyu, some shit isn’t canon but some is and i am too lazy to state what is/isn’t. bite me. baji and reader have really hot sex

wc: 8.9k (i am yelling)

*taps mic* jess this one's for you @zeeroweenies

content: NSFW 18+, fem!reader, unbearable teasing and tension, we have a lil girlboss moment ngl, gang discourse but what else is new (also involving us but we’re ok i promise), mentions of blood from wounds, baji being protective, use of pet name ‘angel,’ degradation if you squint, oral (m&f receiving, baji also licks our taint), face fucking, spit as lube, unprotected sex, tummy bulge, choking, hair pulling, impact play (spanking), overstim (?), squirting, baji fucks us dumb, backshots, shitty aftercare (but aftercare nontheless) i mean its baji cmon what do you really expect stop lying to yourself

a/n: lol remember when i said writing smut isnt my thing? changed my mind this is now an art/smut account sorry about it. this is the result of having baji brainrot for 3 days straight. i barely slept. was h word for 72 consistent hours. i have no regrets. this is purely self indulgent aka i wanna be in a gang and carry a diamond encrusted knife on me at all times

mdni !!!!! or else im taking ur ipad away from u

please have your fucking age in your bio im begging you

“Chifuyu! Where the fuck is your peyoung yakisoba?!”

His voice was so indistinguishable as it rang throughout the small space of the apartment. Deep. Commandeering. Even with your headphones on as you intently focused on your homework, it demanded the attention it never failed to acquire. You internally groaned at the very first syllable you heard.

He let himself in again, that dumbass.

You rolled your eyes, hating yourself for even thinking about responding back in place of your brother’s absence. As much as you dreaded the thought of engaging the ravenette, you knew the sooner he got the information he was searching for, the sooner he would shut up.

“He’s not home!” You shouted back, not waiting for an answer before you situated your headphones back to their original position.

Turning back to your laptop, you wished you didn’t hear the heavy footsteps approaching your closed door. It didn’t take long before he reached for the handle, finding his attempt at barging in futile. “___? Why’s the door locked - you naked or something?”

You scoffed, fully taking your headphones off and resting them around your neck. “You’re a pervert.” Accepting your defeat at evading any conversation with him, you pushed yourself out of your chair and strode to your door, unlocking it and cracking it open slightly. You looked up at his dark eyes staring back down at you, leaning all of his weight on his arm against the doorframe.

“I’m in university, remember? I gave up playing gangster when I was in high school.” You shot up at him, an unbothered expression resting on your face.

It was true, you briefly scuttled around with your brother and his little gang in high school. It wasn’t anything too serious on your part, mostly because Chifuyu would kill you if you let yourself get wrapped up with a few particular enemies of his. You two were incredibly close, but what siblings wouldn’t be after their single mom ran out on them by the time you turned 15? Chifuyu would do anything to protect you, but he knew that he alone wasn’t enough; you ultimately had to learn to protect yourself, which is why you even got involved with his friends in the first place. You learned anything you needed to protect yourself, and being related to someone so deeply tied to Toman, that reputation alone kept you safe. Though you were pretty skilled in fighting, your involvement trailed off once you decided to focus more on your education and getting into university. After all, being in a gang was not a safe or secure way to make a living. But that didn’t mean you stopped keeping your jewel-encrusted knife on you at all times that Chifuyu gifted you when you turned 17.

Baji rolled his eyes at you. “Don’t try and act like you’re above that shit. You’re just as bad as your brother. Now, where is that fucker?”

“I told you, he’s out. And stop letting yourself in, it’s creepy.” You replied back, maintaining your deadpan tone.

He let out an unamused chuckle. “You know I’m not gonna stop. Besides, I was hungry and I know you guys always stay stocked up - at least, I thought you did.”

You decided to mess with him some. “Aw, you didn’t come to see me?”

“Of course not, idiot.”

“Oh, don’t play dumb. Do you think I don’t catch you staring all the time?” You teased him, revelling in the reaction you pulled from him; he didn’t actually stare, you just knew he hated anytime you teased him like this. Although this time, you could practically hear his heart stop in his chest, just inches away from yours.

He narrowed his eyes down at you. “You’re ridiculous. I’m staying here till Fuyu gets back.”

“Like I care. Just don’t bother me anymore.” You moved to put your headphones back over your ears, just wanting the conversation to be over.

“Pretty sure I annoy you just by being here.”

“You’re absolutely right.” You said with a smile, before shutting the door in his face.

Thankfully, you were able to get through all the homework you hoped to complete that evening without any interruptions from Baji or Chifuyu once he returned. He knew how important your studies were to you, and he wanted nothing but success for you, making sure to never break your focus unless something urgent happened.

It wasn’t until you forced yourself to look up from your laptop did you realize what time it was; the dark sky peeking through your window told you it was much later than you had thought, and a glance at your phone confirmed it. 9:13 PM.

You decided that eating dinner would definitely be the smartest decision; your aching stomach would surely appreciate some type of food. Peeling yourself out of your chair for the first time since Baji rudely interrupted, you slid into your slippers beside you and made your way out to the kitchen.

Chifuyu stood at the sink, a dish in one hand and a rag in the other. He heard the quiet pitter-patter of your footsteps and looked up, a soft smile crossing his face. “Hey ___, finished with your work?”

You nodded, silently sighing in annoyance to see Baji still under your roof. “Yeah, finally. ‘M starving, though.” Before you could even make your way to the fridge to throw a makeshift meal together, Chifuyu opened the oven and grabbed a dish covered in tin foil.

“Here, I kept it warm for you.” He spoke tenderly, placing the dish on the countertop for you.

Chifuyu always made sure you ate something before you fell asleep, knowing how often you neglect your self care when it comes to late nights of studying. The gesture reminded you just how much he cared about you. You offered a smile in return. “Thanks, Fuyu.”

Sitting down opposite Baji at the kitchen table - who presumably was satisfied after his friend made him dinner considering his much more mellow nature than earlier - you placed the plate of noodles in front of you and didn’t hesitate to dig in. If Chifuyu did one thing right, it surprisingly was his ability to make a good meal.

“So, how was Mikey?” You asked Chifuyu nonchalantly, not even acknowledging Baji’s presence.

He placed the dish he had cleaned on the drying rack. “You know you don’t have to pretend to be interested in Toman anymore, ___.”

“But what if I am interested?” You countered. “Those guys were my friends for so long - and I mean, you’re practically an exec at this point, my best friend is dating Takemichi...how can I not be somewhat involved still?”

“I thought you were above playing gangster.” Baji chimed in, not breaking eye contact with the phone in his hands.

You shot him a glare for alluding to your conversation earlier. “I’m just saying, is it so wrong for me to ask how everyone is sometimes? Even if it has been months since I’ve seen Mikey or Draken.”

“He asked about you, actually.” Chifuyu stated simply.

“Who, Mikey?” You asked absentmindedly, taking another bite.

He nodded. “Said he missed having you around.”

Thank god you swallowed before hearing Chifuyu’s response, otherwise you’d have choked. It hung in the air for a moment, the silence that followed so deafening. You almost thought you caught a glimpse of Baji’s grip tightening on his phone, but you couldn’t tear your eyes away from Chifuyu across the room. He acted as though he didn’t even say anything, continuing his task of cleaning yet another dish. You noted the suds on his bruised knuckles, moving back and forth as he scrubbed. Cleaning the front, then the back, then rinsing it off. The steady stream of the faucet shut off, but the lingering drops continued for a second, drip, drip, drip…

“___?”

You snapped out of your trance held on the water droplets, finding your brother’s green eyes locked on you. “What’d you tell him?” You took another bite.

“That you were at university now, being a serious adult, doing serious, adult things.” He tossed the towel to the side, apparently done with the chore.

Baji took a sip of his drink. “Is the serious adult still too cool to hang out with the wannabe gangsters?” He continued averting his gaze from you.

“You’re not in this conversation, dumbass.” You retorted, eyes flickering to him for a split second before returning your attention to your brother. You saw him stick his tongue out at you like a damn child out of the corner of your eye, and the tiniest part of you wanted to smile. But, you didn’t. “Why’d he bring me up all of a sudden?”

The blonde just shrugged. “Guess he just misses you.”

You bit the inside of your cheek in slight concentration...or maybe it was contemplation. Your mind wandered back to the last brawl you ever found yourself in the middle of, just before you graduated high school. It was like every other time - Toman got wrapped up in their agenda of having each other's back, finding themselves up against a pretty tough rival gang. You weren’t excused from the brutality that time by any means; the shitheads always liked to try and take out the rival girls, and you never understood why...if they really think girls are weaker, then would it really prove their strength to beat the shit out of one? You were incredibly skilled, though, and most of the time you could stand your ground. But that time, you hesitated a second too long, and before you knew it you were flat on the ground, Chifuyu kneeling over you and cradling your head.

You were okay, but a trip to the ER later revealed a broken jaw and an injured self-esteem. You cursed yourself for letting that lanky asshole knock you out, but your time in the hospital allowed you to reflect some on where to go from there; Chifuyu’s guilt for ever allowing you to join in on fights definitely had a lot of weight on your final decision to step away from the group of boys who occupied most of your time. It forced you to face reality and take some responsibility for your life and where you ended up. Despite those boys practically being family, you needed to step away from that part of your life. So, you turned towards getting a degree and never looked back.

That was over a year ago.

“Is he expecting me to come back or something?” You finally said after your brief self-examination, staring back down at your dinner in front of you. Chifuyu had made his way to join you and Baji at the table.

Shrugging again, he leaned forward on his elbows atop the table’s surface. “Don’t dwell on it, I just thought I’d let you know he hasn’t totally forgotten about you.”

His statement made you smile a little. “Well, who could forget about me?” You joked, causing him to mirror your smile.

“Would you ever come back?” Baji intervened.

“No.” Chifuyu answered for you before you could even think about what you’d respond with. His voice was so firm, so sure.

You raised an eyebrow at your brother. “No?”

“Yeah.” He said, as serious as ever.

Baji shook his head in confusion. “I just heard ‘no’ and ‘yeah,’ which one is it?”

Scoffing at the raven-haired boy, you rolled your eyes. “Dumbass. Since when do you make decisions for me, Chifuyu?”

The blonde sat back in his chair, crossing his arms over his chest. “Did you forget what happened last year? Or did Hanma kick that pretty little head of yours too hard, ___?”

“Fuck you.” You bit back at his remark. “I can take care of myself, just cause you’re a year older than me doesn’t mean I’m some baby.”

“I just don’t want you getting hurt again,” Chifuyu said, “that’s all.”

You pushed yourself out of your seat, deciding that you were thirsty. “Well, I still have that knife you gave me, ready to use whenever.”

Two steps later and Chifuyu was out of his seat, grabbing you and whipping you around to try and catch you off guard, but you moved quicker than him. In an instant, you wielded your knife tucked in your waistline, holding the blade inches away from his face. A proud smile on your face as you locked him in position, you chuckled. “Checking to see if I still remember a thing or two?”

“Always.” He replied, impressed at his little sister.

“Wow, kitty likes to scratch, huh?” Baji laughed, unable to tear his eyes off of the two dangerous siblings.

You let go of the hold you had on Chifuyu, returning the knife back to the holster you keep hidden. It was no exaggeration that you kept it on you at all times. “Suck my dick, Keisuke.” You snapped, furrowing your eyebrows at him.

Reaching up to grab a glass out of your cupboard, you heard the two boys stirring behind you. You turned your head to see Chifuyu sling the familiar black jacket over his shoulders, Baji’s own tucked under his arm. Without them saying anything, you connected the dots. “Oh...that’s why Mikey needed to talk to you today, huh?”

He nodded sheepishly, not looking your way as he headed towards the door. “Something like that, yeah.”

You couldn’t help your heart rate spike a little, the anxiety setting in that always managed to take over whenever you watched Chifuyu leave for the night. Obviously, the shit he was getting into was dangerous, and you couldn’t stop your mind from wandering to the worst case scenario while he was gone. The longer he stayed out, the more worried you grew. You knew your brother was strong, and he absolutely had no problem when it came to protecting himself and his friends. Part of you was just scared that you’d lose the last bit of family you had left.

Chifuyu’s ego was a fragile one too - though he’d never admit it, of course - but you knew he felt the need to prove his strength any chance he got. He never had a father, never had someone teach him how to go out into the world and face what came his way. He was forced to learn it from his delinquent friends; and of course he couldn’t help the cards he was dealt in life, but sometimes you wished things turned out different.

Most of the time, though, you were glad for exactly who Chifuyu was.

You trailed behind them like a lost puppy as they made their way to the exit of the apartment. “Fuyu,” You quietly called.

He hesitated in the open doorway; he knew exactly what you were feeling and this is precisely why he didn’t tell you about the meeting tonight. “I’ll be fine, I promise.” He assured you, pressing his lips into a forced smile.

Nodding to yourself, for a second you almost believed him. “Okay.”

And with that, the blonde and the brunette left into the night.

10:30 rolled around and you still hadn’t fallen asleep. You tossed and turned in your little bed, desperate to find a position comfortable enough to doze off in. Needless to say, your efforts were unsuccessful; any position was unbearable with your mind racing and your brother out in the city doing who knows what. It was always like this. You tried not to let Chifuyu’s undertakings evade your thoughts on a day to day basis, and for the most part, they didn’t. He felt that the less you knew, the better, and you agreed; but that didn’t stop you from speculating his whereabouts when he wouldn’t return home all day, even though he just said he’d be back in under an hour. And your speculations, more often than not, were correct. He’d waltz through that front door, trying his hardest to be as quiet as a mouse, but you were too clever; you’d catch him every time red handed - quite literally, as new battle scars always managed to find their way onto his skin.

Maybe it was your familial bias towards Chifuyu, but you repeatedly found some way to blame that dumbass that lived three floors above the two of you. If it wouldn’t have been for Chifuyu and Baji meeting in middle school, he never would’ve been introduced to Toman in the first place. And although you treated Mikey, Draken, Mitsuya, and the rest of them like siblings, Baji never clicked with you somehow. Sure, you can tolerate him the bare minimum in order to appease your brother, but his gruff and churlish attitude towards you didn’t sit right. Ever since Chifuyu met him - and subsequently discovered he lived in the same building as you - they’ve been inseparable. Baji’s just always been there, though never for you.

Ignoring the tiny voice inside of your head that begged you not to, you found yourself on your feet in one swift motion, the cold evening air sending a sharp chill down your spine. Trading your sleep shorts for something a little more practical, your feet took you over to your closet where you rummaged through the back until your hands landed on what you were searching for. A soft smile tugged at your lips as you admired the embroidery Mitsuya carefully stitched into the fabric for you.

“As the honorary little sis of Toman, I had to specially make yours by hand.” You remembered him saying when he first handed it to you years ago, and you’d always treasure it - whether you were a part of Toman or not.

You threw the black jacket over your t-shirt, stepped into some shoes, and grabbed your keys to your motorcycle. Your plan, though barely a plan at all, was this: go to the spot Toman typically meets, see if the boys were there, and make sure your brother isn’t dead. If they weren’t there, you’d end your search. Simple. At the very least, a nice ride in the brisk night would surely help calm your nerves.

The autumnal air breezes past you as you ride down the barren sidestreets, navigating your way between the concrete buildings surrounding you. Your open jacket catches the wind, chilling you further and making you curse under your breath at your stupidity for only sporting a thin t-shirt tonight. You always loved riding your bike through the city, especially the spontaneous drives with Chifuyu and his friends, somehow going into the earliest hours of the morning. There were times you even stayed up until the sun rose (mostly due to Mikey’s pleading), and as much as you hate to admit it, those times you cherish the most.

Your little joyride was short lived sadly; before you knew it, you heard the familiar shouts from the gang growing louder and louder, indicating you had arrived at the correct spot. Shedding your helmet and buttoning your jacket halfheartedly, you carried yourself down to the opening that was home to the voices. And then, you saw them; Mikey, Draken, Baji, and Takemichi, all lined up behind Chifuyu as he stared up at Kisaki. Hanma was right by his side.

The quiet sounds of you approaching the group must’ve been much louder than you thought, because as soon as you came into view, Mikey called out to you.

“Oi, is that ___?” He asked; there was a hint of excitement in his voice.

You could feel your brother’s gaze burning into your skull the closer you drew near, furious that you even thought about coming out here. You knew he would be mad at you for this choice, but you still stand by your decision. He’s been there for you all these years, you felt you should do the same.

“Weren’t done playing gangster after all, huh?” Baji teased, flashing his little fangs at you with a toothy grin.

You approached the group, locking eyes with the brunette for a passing second. “Nice ponytail, dumbass.”

“Ew, don’t compliment me like that. They’re gonna think we’re friends.” He scoffed, switching his smirk out for a frown, his eyebrows knitted together.

“Go home, ___.” Chifuyu ordered, petulance laced through the simple phrase, pulling your attention over towards him, but only momentarily.

Hanma took a few steps towards you, eyes shooting daggers into yours as if he were warning you. A simper played on his lips. “Looks like you healed up real nice from last time I saw you. Maybe this time you won’t be so lucky.”

“Hanma…” Draken interjected, but you silenced him.

“No, I think I will be lucky this time actually.” You smirked up at him, implicitly begging him to make a move.

And he played right into it, that cocky son of a bitch. It all happened quickly, the way he swung at you, with such force and arrogance, like he was sure he would knock you out in one punch. But his pomposity proved faulty in this instance, for you dodged it with such finesse, sweeping his legs out from under him and pinning him down. Your blade was drawn, inches away from his face, your other hand securing his arm and digging your knee into his back. Giggling softly, you scowled down at him. “Seems I did get lucky this time around, huh?”

While your eyes were trained on him, you were completely unaware of what occurred behind you. Kisaki decided to dismiss whatever business he had with your brother, deeming the situation with Hanma far more important since you had a weapon too close for comfort. But before he could get close to you, the ravenette tackled him, slamming his head to the concrete and knocking his glasses off his smug face.

“You touch her, you die.” He spit, not a hint of sarcasm in his voice. If not for that unmistakable voice that sounded in the quiet night, you wouldn’t have believed it was Baji. It caught you off guard, mostly because he always had a jovial tonality whenever he spoke. He wasn’t serious by nature, but he sure as shit was at this moment in time. You made sure to not lose focus on keeping Hanma down, but managed to steal a brief glance towards the scene unraveling.

Kisaki laughed beneath Baji’s weight. “Since when do you give a shit about little Matsuno?”

Instead of a proper response, Baji sent a clean, hard punch right to his face. “Talk about her again, I dare you.”

“Kei, you don’t need-” Chifuyu started to say, taking a step towards his friend, but the brunette completely ignored him, striking his enemy again. Blood trickled from his nose, eyes hazy as they peered skywards.

Hanma’s eyes focused over to the brawling men, snickering softly. “Your boyfriend seems to be doing a good job of protecting you.”

You rest the blade right under his jaw, not forcefully, but with enough contact to get the point across. “I don’t need anyone to protect me. I’m the one with the knife, remember?”

“____, do you really need to have a knife pulled on him?” Takemichi asked, his voice trembling slightly.

Mikey laughed at his question. “Let her be, she’s got it handled.”

Meanwhile, Baji kept his eyes trained on the body beneath him. “Now, tell me you’re gonna fuck off from messing with Matsuno or else I’m killing you right here and now.”

“No need to make such empty promises, Keisuke. I just wanted to make sure Chifuyu knew who he was dealing with, 's all.” Kisaki spoke smoothly, as if he didn’t just get his nose broken. “I think we’ve all had enough fun for tonight, yeah?”

Not satisfied with his answer, Baji gave him one last jab, putting him right to sleep. He got up from his position, walking over to you and resting a hand on your shoulder. “You can get up, ___. He won’t hurt you.”

Gritting your teeth behind your closed lips, you pulled the knife away from Hanma’s neck, barely nicking him in the process. Your eyes didn’t leave the tiny drop of blood that formed as you stood up and off of the arrogant man beneath you. Turning your back on him, you walked over to your brother.

Your eyes flickered up to Baji’s. “You didn’t need to do that for me.”

He rolled his eyes, walking further ahead of you as he inspected the fresh wounds on his knuckles. “Like I did that for you. I knew Fuyu would never shut up if you got hurt again.” He pulled the hair tie out of his hair, allowing his dark locks to cascade over his shoulders and bathe in the moonlight.

You fell back, joining Chifuyu who stood perfectly still, frozen and staring at the ground where you previously had control over Hanma. He controlled his breathing, balling his hands in fists beside himself. You crossed your arms in front of your chest. “Ready to go home?”

I’ll save it for tomorrow, he thought to himself. He couldn’t bring himself to go off on you here, in front of everyone. Nodding, he sucked up his pride. “Yeah, let’s go home.”

You barely got any sleep that night, thanks to the adrenaline pumping through your veins. The second you got home, Chifuyu wordlessly entered his room, secluding himself for the rest of the night. Fleeing to your own, you settled under the covers, but no matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t help but overthink every little thing that happened that night.

Specifically, Baji’s behavior.

Why would he say the things he said - ‘You touch her, you die’ ? Beating the shit out of Kisaki like...like he cared about you or something. But then he goes and acts like he doesn’t care about you.

Of course he doesn’t care about you, he never has, never will.

‘Like I’d do that for you’

The words replayed over and over in your head, an endless cycle of convincing yourself that he’s just lying and actually does care about you, but then overthinking your entire relationship with him and deciding that there’s no way he didn’t mean the things he said.

The reason for your racing heart and anxiety coursing through your whole body was not the fact that you successfully stopped Hanma from attacking you yet again, it was the fact that this person who never passed up on a chance to annoy the ever living shit out of you, potentially tried protecting you that night.

By the time the sun rose, you and Chifuyu were yelling at each other like real siblings do in the living room. You couldn’t have been more spot on with how you expected the argument to go; he, of course, scolded you for being so stupid, so careless, because “what if you weren’t able to take him down, what then?” And you shot back at him with “but I did take him down, I told you I can take care of myself!” Which cascaded the entire argument into one about how Chifuyu treats you like you’re five and doesn’t have any faith in you. His reasoning for that was he just cares about you too much, you’re family, you’re all he has left...of course he’s going to worry.

When you heard this, the only response you found fitting was something along the lines of “You’re wrong, you have Toman! You have a hundred guys ready to back you up - ready to treat you like family. I don’t have that anymore - you’re my only family and you know it”

Were you proud of that response? You weren’t entirely sure. It sounded right in the heat of the moment, but the way his face dropped and he instantly got quiet, you felt a slight twinge of regret for your choice in words. As he grabbed his keys from the counter, he muttered a quiet “I’ll see you later” before he shut the front door behind him.

And so, here you were, twelve minutes later, curled up in your bed trying to at least take a brief nap since you didn’t sleep at all. The closest you got to a nap was keeping your eyes shut for a solid minute before you heard the front door open and close in haste.

That was quick, you thought to yourself, forcing yourself to sit upright in your bed as you locked your eyes on your open doorway, expecting to see your brother.

What you didn’t expect was to see Baji standing there instead, breathing heavily, and a small smirk on his face. “Hey, ___.”

You pushed yourself out of bed awkwardly, a little confused that he of all people was there. “Chifuyu isn't home...I actually thought he was with you-”

“I didn’t come to see Chifuyu.” He stated.

A deafening hush fell over the two of you. He looked like hell - probably just as bad as you looked, to be honest. Dark bags rest beneath his moody eyes and his hair hung impossibly messy beside his face. His breathing began to still as more seconds passed.

His eyes searched yours for any sort of answer. “Say something.”

“What do you want me to say?” It was as much of a response as you could muster; your thoughts were all over the place.

He rocked onto his toes nervously. “You don’t wanna know what I want you to say.”

You swallowed the lump in your throat, beginning to fiddle with your fingers - a bad habit you nurse when you find yourself in uneasy situations. You were mute again, unknowing how to even begin to navigate this conversation.

“Don’t pick at your fingers like that, it's bad for you.”

You let out an incredulous exhale. “I don’t think you’re in any position to talk about proper hand-care.” You teased lightheartedly, glancing down to his own torn knuckles from last night’s fight. “Let me get you some bandages.” You said, composing yourself some and brushing past the tall boy hurriedly. He never stopped you.

You wandered down the hallway into yours and Chifuyu’s shared bathroom, scouring the medicine cabinet for the proper first aid. As you pulled out the products, Baji settled himself on top of the toilet seat, looking around absentmindedly.

Grabbing disinfectant, you took his right hand in yours. Part of you was a little nervous to hold his hand, but you brushed it off. “This might sting a little.” You warned, before applying the compound to his small cuts.

His hand twitched in yours. “I’m not a pussy, that was just a reflex.”

“Sure,” You taunted, taking the bandage and rolling his knuckles up in them, securing it so it wouldn’t unravel. “Other hand.”

Reciprocating your actions, you could feel Baji’s smile without even seeing it. When you were finished, you shoved the unused bandages to the side. “All done.”

“So are you even gonna ask why I’m here?”

You leaned against the counter, thinking about exactly what you wanted to say. “I have a couple thoughts of my own on why you’re here.”

“I’m all ears.”

Scrunching your nose in mock annoyance, you huffed. “I think you were lying last night when you said you didn’t beat up Kisaki for me.”

Baji nodded his head, running a hand through his hair. “Would it be so bad if I told you you were right?”

“I thought you hated me.”

“I thought you hated me.” He exclaimed. “You’re not exactly subtle about how annoyed you are with me so much as being near you.”

Rolling your eyes, you scoffed in disbelief. “Please, you make it your life mission to bother the absolute hell out of me. Anytime I’m with you and Chifuyu, you practically beg me to leave you guys alone.”

“Maybe I’m just bad at making friends, okay! You know I’m not that smart, how on earth am I supposed to act around someone like you?!” His words became progressively more passionate, more urgent - it was undeniable that he was starting to ramble, letting any and every thought he had just fall past his lips in an effortless revelation. He was on his feet now, and suddenly the small bathroom became a confined, suffocating space; taking a frantic breath, he stepped past you, out into the hall. Finally, he could breathe.

You trailed behind him, suddenly becoming shy as you listened to him drone on.

“I don’t even know why I came here, to be honest. I-I just couldn’t sleep last night because I kept thinking about you and - fuck, that sounds creepy...” He turned on his heel, hands finding his head again, burying the bandaged fingers deep in the roots of his hair. “It’s pathetic, honestly, because you’re so smart and mature even though you’re younger than me and you’re already so successful going to university...it doesn’t make any sense at all, really, but for some reason I-” He stopped his manic monologue, taking a deep breath and shutting his eyes before speaking again. “I like you, regardless of the way you ridicule me and constantly tell me to shut up and - shit, I even like the way you call me dumbass. You have no idea what you do to me, and you don’t even try.”

He ran out of things to say, it seemed - or maybe he just wanted to give you a chance to add something to the conversation. You couldn’t tell in the dim lighting of the hallway, but his hands were shaking ever so slightly; he shoved his hands into the pockets of his jacket, as if they were a safe haven and would rid him of his uneasiness.

Before you could utter a single word, he spoke again. “Sorry if this is all too much, I just didn’t know what to do, a-and I’m bad with my words so I probably didn’t do a good job of explaining exactly how I feel-”

“If you’re bad with your words, then show me.” You said, a newfound confidence overcoming you out of nowhere.

Your words left him dumbfounded. He quirked a thick eyebrow. “What did you just say?”

“I said…” You took a step closer to him, “Show me how you feel.”

He wasted no time in closing whatever space was left between the two of you, hands finding either side of your face and pulling you to him. Crashing his lips onto yours, it was a wonder how your knees didn’t give out right then and there; you immediately melted into him, lips working feverishly against his and gladly welcoming his exploring tongue. It was almost as if he read your mind, clutching onto your shoulders and backing you up against the wall, somehow deepening the kiss further.

Barely detaching his hungry lips from yours, he mumbled against your lips. “You want me to show you what I’m feeling right now?”

Before you could even form a response, he drove his hips into yours, allowing you to feel just how hard he was and pulling a quiet whimper from your chest. This time, your knees did buckle under you, but Baji made sure to keep you upright between his strong hands. “Thought you were stronger than that, Angel. Don’t go tapping out on me just yet.”

You fluttered your eyes open, already drunk off his actions and butterflies forming in your tummy. His dark eyes held your gaze, so moody and mysterious, you found yourself getting lost in them. How did you never realize it before? How enchanting his eyes were, the specks of gold seemingly shimmering down at you. You knew your disdain for him didn’t allow you to feel anything other than aggravation towards him, but after what transpired last night, you couldn’t help but feel pure, unadulterated admiration towards him.

Maybe he really did care about you all this time.

Just the mere thought of this led you to kissing him once more, wrapping your arms around his neck, clutching onto him as if your life depended on it. All you could think about was how you wanted nothing more than to lose yourself in his touch. Tongues battling for dominance, though he was clearly winning, you moaned into his mouth as his wandering hand brushed up your side to eagerly paw at your breast.

“Kei…” You panted, the two of you catching your breath for a fleeting second.

He smiled down at you, showing off his cute little fangs. “You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to do that.”

A grin tugged at your lips. “What else have you been waiting to do with me?”

That certainly wasn’t the reply he was expecting. His cock pulsed beneath the fabric of his sweats at your words; he couldn’t even begin to explain what he wanted to do with you - what he wanted to do to you. As if it was possible, you had managed to make him even more turned on. Your aura captivated every ounce of his being; your smile, your scent, your touch, everything tumbled together in his mind and ran straight to his dick.

His body moved faster than his mind - in one effortless movement, he threw you over his shoulder and charged down the hall to your room, leaving you a mess of giggles. He thought about his hand placement, though, one strong hand over your ass to ensure you didn’t fall. Tossing you onto your bed, you smiled up at him as he crawled over you, immediately rolling his hips against yours and attaching his lips to your neck.

The tiny room was filled with the sounds of your breathy moans while Baji left wet, open-mouthed kisses along the column of your throat. A bandaged hand joined in, wrapping itself lightly around your neck. He slid a thigh in between yours, allowing you to grind your throbbing cunt against him.

“Kei, fuck” you gasped, feeling his fangs sink into your flesh as he marked you, running his hot tongue over the bruise once he was pleased with the result.

“Need something, Angel?” He asked innocently, punctuating his question with another grind of his hard-on against your heat.

“Wait,” you spoke quietly, squeezing his arm to catch his attention.

Instantly, he pulled away. “What’s wrong?”

Turning coy, you brought your hand down to grab his bulge, fitting your hand perfectly around his length. “Have you been waiting for me to suck your cock?”

His cheeks flushed a deep rose color, his breathing halting when you palmed over him. Ever so slightly, he nodded his head and swallowed hard. “Yeah, I can’t count the times I’ve dreamt about the way those pretty lips of yours would look around my dick, Angel.”

Satisfied with his answer, you pecked his lips quickly. “Go lock the door.”

He left your side in a hurry, darting across the room to slam the door shut and locking it, returning back to you - who sat with her legs hanging off the end of the bed. Approaching you, he craned down to capture your lips in another rushed kiss, groaning as your hands found the waistband of his sweatpants. He broke the kiss, pulling his shirt up and over his head, tossing it to the side.

Shoving the fabric down, you didn’t hold back from smirking at the clear imprint of his cock, still veiled behind his thin briefs. You noticed the darker spot in the fabric, clearly a result of his leaking tip. Running your hands over his backside, you brought him closer to you, wide eyes maintaining eye contact as you pressed a chaste kiss to the head.

“Fuck, ___.” He groaned, brushing some of your hair over your shoulder and out of the way.

You couldn’t wait any longer, tearing the fabric off and allowing his painfully hard dick to spring up and slap against his abdomen. It was long and thick, flushed a pretty pink at the tip and littered in veins. Staring down his impressive size, you licked your lips, eager to wrap them around his cock.

Your eyes lit up at a particularly prominent vein running the length of his shaft; you ran your tongue slowly, delicately along that pulsating vein. You knew that the teasing drove him wild from the shaky breath he released, inflating your ego even more. Swirling your tongue tantalizingly slow around his head, you quickly took him into your mouth, forcing as much of his length as you could possibly fit without gagging.

The sudden action caused him to thrust himself further into your mouth. “Shit, s-sorry, you just - fuck...” He stammered, and you pulled off him entirely, connecting a thin string of saliva from your lip to his head.

“Don’t apologize,” You assured him, licking your lips once more and feeling confident. “Do it again.”

And your lips were around him once more; you tried steadying your breaths as you bobbed your head, his tip repeatedly hitting the back of your throat. You swallowed reflexively around him, earning yet another strained moan from the brunette.

Both his hands were on your head, somewhat aiding you as you worked yourself along his cock. He pushed your head just a little deeper, and you relaxed yourself, enabling him to finally feel that snug feeling of your throat that he’s been so patient for. “Fuck, Angel, take my fucking cock...just like that,” He chanted, adoring the way your throat felt around him.

Tears brimming your eyes, you came up for air, unable to contain your gag reflex any longer. Giving your mouth a second to rest, you spit in your hand, wrapping it around his dick and harshly jerking him off.

Taking him in your mouth again, one hand fondled his balls gently. Baji continued to fuck your face, and you loved every second of it. It was pathetic how much you enjoyed the way his tip kissed the back of your mouth, how your throat stretched around him to take his girth. You couldn’t stand the way your clit was throbbing, so your free hand traveled to rub yourself over your shorts.

He cracked his eyes open, noticing the way you began touching yourself, and immediately tugged on your hair to pry you off his cock. “Look at you, thinking you can get yourself off from your tiny little hand.”

“Please, Kei,” You whined, hands working at undoing your shorts and sliding them down your legs.

“Want me to touch you, Angel?” He proposed, gesturing for you to lay flat on your back. You nodded your head feverishly in response, tugging your sweater over your head so you were just left in your panties and bralette. His hungry eyes trailed over your body, taking in all your beauty laid out for him. A lone hand traveled to cup your left breast. “You’re gonna have to beg a little harder, then.”

Groaning, you brought your hands up around his neck. “Kei, please, I need you inside me.”

An eyebrow curled quizzically. “Do you need my fingers?” He asked, pulling your panties to the side and swiping a finger between your wet folds. You moaned as he dipped the slender digit deep into your hole, instantly curling and hitting that sweet spot you can never seem to reach on your own.

He bent down to kiss over the bruise he left along your neck earlier, hovering his head right next to your ear as he whispered, “Or do you need me to fuck you?”

Your walls clenched around his long finger at his words, hips bucking up to indicate just how desperate you were for him to ruin you. “Fuck, please fuck me, Kei. I need your cock.” If you weren’t as turned on, you would’ve hated yourself for sounding so needy, but after getting a glimpse of just how big he was and how nice he fucked your mouth, you couldn’t resist him.

He sent you a devilish smirk, fangs on display as he ripped your panties off. “That’s better, Angel.”

Lifting your hips slightly, he guided his tip between your swollen lips, covering it in your arousal. That wasn’t enough for him, though; allowing a fat pearl of saliva to fall past his lips onto your quivering hole, he dragged his tip through his spit before sinking it into you.

“Fuck,” he rasped, eyes locked on how you swallowed his length further and further, hugging him so tightly.

You couldn’t help the pornographic moan you released as he entered you, feeling the way you contracted around his frenulum. You swore you could feel every one of his veins against your walls as he pushed into you slowly.

Bottoming out, you felt his balls rest against the curve of your ass; you mentally thanked him for giving you a second to adjust to the sheer size of him, because as soon as you gave him the silent signal to keep going, he never stopped.

Nearly drawing himself all the way out of you, he forcefully thrust right back in just for you to let out another moan. It was music to his ears, the way you moaned from his cock splitting you open. Desperate hands yanked your bralette down, putting your tits on display for him as they bounced with every ruthless thrust of his hips.

God, you’re gorgeous, he thought to himself. The image of you burned into his mind so it was impossible for him to forget. He filed it away in his head - the sight of you spread for him, a moaning mess with his markings painted on your skin, eyes screwed shut in intoxication - for him to remember whenever he was alone in his bedroom. He didn’t know if he was ever going to have you like this again, so he had to make sure this time counted.

He didn’t know it yet, but you never wanted this to end, so helplessly obsessed with the boy who only two days ago presumably hated you.

Despite not knowing, he did everything in his power to make sure you came crawling back to him. “Shit, Angel,” he puffed, not easing up on his pace, “You like the way my cock stretches you out, hm?”

All you could manage was a whimper in response, forcing your eyes open to stare up at him. He just smirked down at you, giving you a slow but deep thrust, kissing your cervix. His eyes flickered down to the little bulge below your naval that he created, bringing a bandaged hand to your tummy and pressing down.

“Look at that, Angel - I’m in your stomach.” He brought that same hand away from your abdomen and placed it around your neck, resuming his former harsh tempo of fucking into you. “No one can fuck you like me, isn’t that right, ___? This is my pretty little pussy.”

You nodded your head, tongue lolling out of your mouth. “Right, Kei. ‘S all yours.”

That familiar coil was winding in your stomach; chasing your high, you brought two fingers down to lazily circle your clit. He squeezed your neck tighter, aiding you in reaching your climax. “You gonna cum for me, Angel?”

Loving how his choking made your head feel a little dizzy, you clenched around his cock in reply. You fastened the pace of your fingers, and the unrelenting snap of his hips against yours pushed you over the edge. Contracting hard around his dick, your powerful orgasm finally hit you. “Keisuke, fuck!”

Being the gentleman he was, he fucked you through your high, but the second your breathing settled, he completely pulled out of you. Before you could even ask what he was doing, his deep voice ordered you: “On your hands and knees, I’m not done with you yet.”

The command went straight to your pussy. Despite how fucked out you were already, you rolled onto your stomach willingly, sticking your ass up and resting on your wobbly arms.

Baji knelt down behind you, running his tongue up your sensitive slit. You inhaled sharply from the feeling of his wet muscle against your already sopping hole; when you felt him kitten lick your taint, chills ran up your back, but you leaned back further into him, not wanting his mouth to leave your core.

“You taste amazing, Angel.” He exhaled, kissing your hole a final time.

He abruptly moved away, taking the base of his cock in his hand and sheathing himself into your abused cunt once again. Baji kneaded the flesh of your ass, mouth watering at how his dick disappeared into you. He smacked your right cheek hard enough to leave an imprint, and he groaned at the sight.

A large hand rested on the small of your back, and though he wasn’t forceful, the slight pressure had you buckling under your own weight due to your exhaustion. You moaned into your comforter as he rutted into you again and again, balls slapping your overstimulated clit.

“You fucked out already?” He chuckled, before he grabbed a handful of your hair and jerked you upwards, curving your back into a pretty arch. “There we go, Angel. Now I can hear how pretty you sound.”

“Kei…” You whined. If it was even possible, this new position allowed Baji to hit deeper spots inside of you; each drive of his cock against your walls made you see stars. The only word you could think of was his name - he completely fucked you dumb. “Fuck, Kei-”

The squelching sounds of your pussy filled the room as he mercilessly pounded into you. He hung his head back in pleasure, feeling his own climax approaching quickly. Your second orgasm of the night was building too, much quicker than the first.

“Angel, shit, love how you squeeze me,” A groan came from behind you and he let go of your hair, another hand crashing down on your ass.

Face planted in the sheets, your cries were muffled as they came tumbling out, the tension in your stomach becoming unbearable. You gripped his cock harshly as you came, your juices spilling out of you and coating Baji’s abdomen.

The way you squirted around him sent him over the edge; he pulled out of you at the last possible minute before his hot cum spurted out of his slit, covering your ass and lower back. “Fuck…” He sighed, stroking his cock languidly as he continued to paint your back with his release.

He swiped the hair that clung to his glistening forehead out of the way before climbing off the bed, grabbing the box of tissues off your dresser and bringing them over. You continued to sit there, face down and ass up, as you panted, trying to catch your breath. Your overstimulated pussy continued to flutter around nothing as he cleaned his cum off your skin, tossing the used tissues on your nightstand.

You finally rolled onto your back, turning your head and watching as he cleaned himself off. Feeling your face heat up, you covered your eyes with your arm; that was the first time you’ve ever squirted, and you were starting to think it wasn’t possible for you to. Clearly, you just needed to be fucked right.

He joined you back on the bed, lying next to you and letting out a long exhale. “Y’know, I’m never gonna be able to fuck my fist again after feeling that heavenly pussy of yours around me.”

You looked at him, letting out a tired laugh. “Who said you can’t just come over anytime you’re in the mood?”

“This wasn’t a one time thing?” He asked, feeling his heart flutter in his chest, a slight blush covering his cheeks.

You shrugged. “It can be a one time thing, but I was hoping otherwise.”

He smiled, pulling you into a warm embrace and pressing a gentle kiss to the top of your head. The last thing he wanted to do was bring up the topic of labels, so the two of you just continued to lay there in silence, simply enjoying each other’s presence.

It wasn’t until you heard the distant open and shut of your front door were you pulled out of your post-sex haze. Then, the familiar rattle of your doorknob. “___? Let me in... can we talk for a sec?”

You and Baji looked at each other, wide eyed and somewhat fearful. There was no way the two of you were getting out of this one.

[magicianenthusiast]

Very Important dabi headcanons

his eyes glow in the dark. this headcanon is very close to my heart

the glow doesn’t help him in any way, doesn’t improve his vision, nothing

if anything its a hindrance bc they glow really bright and they give him away on night missions

none of the other todorokis have glowing eyes. its just dabi. nobody knows why.

it started during puberty and he didn’t notice for the longest time until one day he caught sight of himself in a mirror one night and was like huh. then he forgot about it again.

when the league first started living together he scared the shit out of tomura by standing in the pitch black on his way back from the fridge bc all he saw were a pair of glowing eyes staring back at him

i am on team tall dabi

according to google endeavour is 6′5. i like the idea that dabi is the same height, or at least within an inch

like hes just Uncomfortably Tall

but hes still built like a piece of string and horrific posture

his quirk burns a lot of fat bc its really too powerful for his body to handle so hes really scrawny

this is another reason nobody realised touya = dabi

he just Looms. he doesn’t even mean to.

he doesn’t use gamer talk like shigaraki and spinner but his way of talking is Absolutely Incomprehensible at times

when he first ran away he was really keen to get rid of his richboy accent so any piece of slang he came across he immediately incorporated into his way of speaking

he also tried to mimic rougher ways of talking from other villains he ran into whether or not it fitted

the results were painfully cringe but after a while he settled into it and it just became a part of being dabi

even the other villains have to ask what the fuck hes saying sometimes

like he basically speaks the japanese version of cockney rhyming slang

he never went to school, or had any friends

at first he had a private tutor bc endeavour wanted to focus in on hero education in a way that he couldn’t at a normal school

he still learnt all the normal subjects but there was less focus put on them

he learnt a lot about the history of heroes, hero laws, the science of fire, strategy, etc.

this came at the expense of a lot of more creative lessons like art

he was meant to go to school after shoto was born and endeavour gave up training him, but then he attacked shoto

after that endeavour decided it was a risk to have dabi around other civilian kids (and also he didn’t want people to know that his family wasnt perfect)

because he never went to school theres loads that everyone else knows that dabi just doesnt

like not just social skills - which he definitely lacks - or experience of school culture

but bc his lessons were so focused on hero work it came at the price of other basic lessons

like the planets. dabi straight up didn’t know about other planets until he was in his late teens.

he watches every episode of ancient aliens. he insists he watches it ironically. hes lying.

hes trans (another reason nobody recognised him).

hes annoyingly good at shogi, mahjong, go, chess, and poker. hes pretty good at cardgames. hes atrociously bad at video games.

the only exceptions are candy crush and fruit ninja and other shitty mobile games.

hes dyslexic so even though he enjoys reading he hates how long it takes him so he rarely does. his handwriting is also really bad.

he has a twitter account, its under a fake name and he uses it purely to pick pointless fights with people.

also i know mha takes place like 200 yrs into the future, but i like the idea that tumblr has somehow remained exactly the same and dabi is on there

like cmon he is SUCH a tumblr kid

he lets toga dye his hair for him these days. since he cant put the black directly onto the white, he lets her pick out the base colour first.

during the interim before he joined the league he had a few jobs

i like the idea giran owns several businesses that are fronts for Nefarious Activities and gave dabi jobs in them bc he didn’t really care how bad dabi was at it

dabi never got good at customer service but he did get a lot of experience running the businesses (a bar, small noodle place, corner shop)

when theyre short staffed giran still calls in dabi and bc the businesses are all in bad areas where heroes don’t patrol everyones just like. ok.

like sometimes people just walk in and see wanted fugitive and  murderer dabi counting the tills. it be like that sometimes.

[heyyylittlemo]

Small details in 19 Days that keep me up at night

((That I feel rarely gets talked about))

-Mo Guan Shan & The Zodiac Magazine

This chapter was pretty early on in 19days—So that must mean Mo Guan Shan has done this a lot more since, right??😳 and he didn’t even rlly know HT that well at this point so...he must be in heat on the low for HT by now 🥵🥵

So it canonically confirms at least a base physical attraction from the start—and c’mon if this isn’t the most relatable thing ever. Soon as I get an attraction to someone I’m a bit piqued to find out their zodiac. Mo Guan Shan’s hidden curiosity for HT is lwk so cute.

It def suggests that MGS has an under the surface lvl (where he can’t even detect it) pull to understand and get closer to HT.

Mo Guan Shan dreaming of He Tian

I know it was passed off like a “joke” and a “nightmare” but cmon this gay as hawlll

Who DOESN’T dream of their crush?? Dreams usually are about things we heavily think about and/or what we thought about before bed—and I can’t help but to think OX was onto smth

Not to mention, this has high bottom-denial energy. Literally. Like he was soooo trying to avoid getting a shot at the docs bc it was in his ass, why??? Like sir...ur fragile masculinity that was created from ur inner homophobia towards ur own bottom reality was def crashing at that second

N Why he got pain in his tushy??? In this dream?? N ppl bullying him like that abt it lmaoo who irl be saying those things?? Things like “aren’t in the guy who got a shot in ur ass” and “haha I’d like to see you with ur ass in the air~” even tho the translation and the way it was written can be said to mean that these bullies are literally finding it funny that his ass was in the air I have a feeling it was censored and rephrased to hint at its actual implications,, I feel like these guys were actually trying to jokingly solicit Mo in gay acts thru him bottoming—in reaction to the needle butt-scenario. I feel like OX wants us to read between the lines.

And if you see it that way, it really makes it seem like Mo is having a sexuality crisis here. And I think it’s what OX was building up to around that time bcuz it was around after the kiss happened.

It rlly makes me believe MGS genuinely thinks getting a shot in his ass will somehow societally and with unspoken words “expose” him and miraculously express to others that he likes it up the ass—bcuz u cannot tell me that dream and what those bullies were saying weren’t his damn paranoia demons talking

I think a dream interpreter could stretch it enough to say that the bullies are a metaphor of his own insecurities towards his homosexuality and particularly towards his upcoming bottoming feelings. Like he’s legit scared of a hospital needle in his butt—this is not straight behavior. And then we have He Tian to the rescue—(and do you see his look and his flirtatious line) and omg he’s gripping the shit out of his ass in the dream. He’s both being bullied for his bottom-ness and guilty-pleasure getting one rubbed out by He Tian. Like ok, have ur cake and eat it then bitch.

Mo Guan Shan Staring at He Tian

This was a moment leading up to the kiss. MGS was staring (probably admiring while also judging and heating up over HT) He Tian while he was playing BSKTBall—and As a BL writer myself can’t help but to think HT noticed MGS very not-straightly stare at him with a sort of sexual attraction he had towards him on the field.

Like cmon?? I doubt OX writes lines like these for no reason.

I feel like...at least irl...The eyes usually give it away if someone is interested in you or not. you can always see if someone is checking you out and noticing you in a different light like it just has different vibe and feel to it. OX was def trying to show and not tell with this panel that MGS has noticed HT and stares at him in the way we all hope he does. We don’t really get to see and (and I guess it keeps us on our toes and keeps us wondering if the little redhead could actually be falling for HT)—so it’s very subtle, but it is there, and once you notice it you’re like d a m n this makes the kiss scene so much more hopeful (at least for me).

I think this was the push that gave HT hopes to kiss MGS in the first place and it gets overlooked. How do you think HT own curiosity peeked? I think as a community we often think abt Mo and how he developed feelings or will develop feelings for HT but rarely do we ever questions The Who what when where and how He Tian came to like Mo himself. I have my own feelings about them that I can’t explain in this post, least it gets off-topic, but I think it’s very important.

I think his comment “Do I really disgust you that much” makes more sense in this context, of MGS giving HT some reassurance through non-verbal ques. HT was already under the impression that MGS was egging him on with his staring so it can warrant some of He Tian’s confusion. HT probably is pursuing MGS bc he probably senses some lvl of homosexual tension from Mo, and it’s exciting to him. Not only that, but MGS is exciting in his character. So I think HT was also relatively new to this venture and kinda spontaneously kissed Mo out of his own curioustes to explore their attractions and to get a grasp of what Mo was feeling.

It also makes me think HT and MGS experienced some undeniable pleasure or unspoken moment that could not be denied within the kiss as attraction and when MGS then decided to go agaisnt that with violence it only further hit HT, who knew MGS was lying to himself. I mean, it’s a classic BL moment. The two kiss, obviously feel smth (probably couldn’t show much of that due to censorship so had to pass it along as a 100% unsatisfactory exchange) and then one, feeling too much all at once and isn’t comfortable with their confirmed suspensions abt their sexuality—denies everything to the other causing further tensions especially sense both know how eachother really feel despite the others denial. And then the rejected one downplays the kiss’ seriousness to soothe their ego knowing full well the kiss meant smth. So they both internalize what the other said and both feel rejected, but both actually liked it. It’s a classic.

I truly feel that if it wasn’t due to censorship, that the kissing scene would’ve looked a lot more consensual than so forceful and wrong. Like it would’ve been taken as an tension filled “experimentation” that we see a lot in BLs and it only further ties into why MGS would be so bashful whenever the kiss is mentioned, and why HT can use it As a leverage over Mo (“don’t make me kiss you again”) bcuz it brings them back to thy moment where HT experienced some “answer” between Mo and that answer was fulfilling even tho it cannot be fulfilled and probably HT is hoping that maybe one day if he teases him enough about it they can share another kiss one that is a lot less rushed and now that they are closer, will lead to a better result.

Anyways those are my speculations. And I actually have written a short story based on these assumptions(focused on the kiss—and it’s also leading up to a jealously fic) but ofc I haven’t written it in ahwile haha. Just thought it was worth sharing since I noticed 19 days has been updating pretty “eh” lately.

[mixchsm]

Out In The Open - MatchaBlossom Quick Write

Kojiro could tell something was up with Kaoru today. He wasn’t entirely sure what it was, but he could tell he was having a hard time speaking it out. When he got like this, Kaoru would be a little more distant than usual. The first few times it happened, Kojiro somehow got it in his head that he’d be handed divorce papers by the end of the week; this of course didn’t happen, and instead Kaoru was gearing up the confidence to ask to visit his mom in Kyoto.

Since the two of them decided to start closing their businesses on Saturdays- solely to spend time together knowing full well their schedules got so busy- they were home together in this weird state of there being something unsaid. Kojiro was doing what he normally did, cooking for Kaoru, while Kaoru sat on the balcony with a single cup of tea. This silence and thought wasn’t something so easily placed. When he was anxious he’d get chai tea, which was a strange pick but it was comforting to him, and yet he hadnt touched it. He’d just sat with his legs up in the chair staring out across the water.

Kojiro walks out, wiping his hand on his apron while setting down a small plate. On days like this, Kaoru refused to eat sometimes, and he always kept the option open. He sits down in the chair on the other side of him, “I brought bruschetta.” he says, “It’s small enough, do you think you could eat it for me?”

He can’t see Kaoru moving much, but his eyes look a bit glassy and irritated. Had he cried that night?

“Please, bunny?” he asks, tilting his head. “Just one bite so I know you’ll be alright.”

“Do you remember the first time I came out to you?”

Kojiro raises a brow, “Uh.. Yeah, year seven.”

The circumstances weren’t ideal, at all, especially for Kaoru. He’d been bullied in school- far too much- for having such long and pretty hair. One of the boys specifically wanted to make his life a living hell, which resulted in them teasing and pulling his hair. When Kojiro stuck up for him, the kids insisted he was standing up for a gay kid and Kaoru couldn’t even deny it when it was just he and Kojiro. Of course, his best friend accepted it with open arms.

“I’ve been lying to you, I think.”

“You’ve been lying?”

“I think.”

“Well.. Hopefully it’s not a bad lie. I’ve spent ten years of marriage with ya, it’d suck to lose those benefits from your job.” he jokes, trying to lighten the mood.

“I’m not playing around, Kojiro.” he says, now turning to face him. He really had been crying. There were still a few tears falling down his cheeks.

His face changes and immediately softens, “I-I’m sorry, Kaoru, but whatever it is I can handle it.” he whispers, reaching out and touching his hand. “Cmon, what is it?”

“I’m uh..” he breathes out, staring at the mug and Kojiros hand, “Im asexual.”

“Huh?”

“We.. We talked about it a while ago, in that show we watch.”

“One Piece?”

“Yeah.. Yeah that one. How I think Zolo’s asexual?”

“Right, right..” he mutters, seemingly trying to piece it together. “So.. What does that mean? For you, I mean, because I remember you saying it’s kind of like a spectrum, right?”

“It is,” Kaoru seems to perk up, turning his body to face Kojiro now. “I just.. I don’t think I experience that kind of attraction? I never have, really.. The love I’ve felt for you has never relied on physicality.”

“You’re not attracted to me, then?”

“N-no! I’m very attracted to you-“

“Just not sexually, right?”

“I..” Kaoru breathes out, “No.. Not really.”

“Is it something I’ve done?”

Kaoru shoots his hands out and grabs Kojiros, “No. Not at all, this is.. This is a me-thing, this has nothing to do with anything you’ve done.”

“Then why are you crying so much, bun?”

He seems taken back, as if he didn’t even realize he’d been crying. “I was scared to tell you.”

“Why?”

“I didn’t want our relationship to change.”

Kojiro thinks for a moment, “So then, what does this mean for us?”

“Hm?”

“Well, you’re not all that into sexual practices right? So what can we do different that’ll make you more comfortable?”

Kaoru seems to think for a minute, clearly he didn’t get this far in his stewing. He didn’t know what to say, really, because he genuinely didn’t expect Kojiro to be so kind about it. He rubs his thumb back and forth on his hands, biting his lip. That’s his signal, his nonverbal and barely noticeable signal that Kojiro had gotten so used to.

He stands up, not letting go of Kaorus hands before crouching in front of him. “Whatever you say will not change anything between us.” he reassures him with a whisper. “So feel free to tell me, bun.”

“I don’t like when you do… Stuff to me.”

“Stuff?”

“Like I.. I’m more focused in making you feel good, really. It’s nice to get off, but there are times where I don’t need to, I guess.”

“Alright then..”

Taking the hint that he’s slowly but surely grasping it, Kaoru continues. “I love that you like to make me feel good, obviously, because I know it’s something you’re.. Very good at.”

Kojiro smiles at the blush to his cheeks and chuckles a bit, “I am indeed. Can I ask you something?”

“Of course.”

“So you’ve initiated things between us. Was it because you felt.. Forced or influenced by me?”

“No!” he blurts, pulling his hands away and grabbing his cheeks. “Never in a million years, of course not. You’ve never ever ever made me feel forced, don’t ever say that. I’m so sorry-“

“Hey.” he whispers, gently holding the hand on his cheek and leaning into it. “Don’t apologize, Kaoru, I’m being safe okay?”

“How could I ever feel forced by you..” he sniffles, feeling another breakdown coming. He had the most patient and kind husband in the world, he knew that, and the idea of him feeling like he influenced Kaoru’s decision felt like a gut punch.

“I just wanted to make sure you’ve never done something you didn’t want to.” he smiles.

“Everything we’ve done, I’ve wanted.” he says, “I just.. I don’t hate sex, you know? I just kind of have a better time knowing you’re enjoying it.”

“Alright.” he says, “So what can I do differently.”

“What we’ve been doing is fine.” he nods, tugging at Kojiros sleeve to pull him closer. “You listen to me.. That’s all I could ask for.”

Kojiro stands up, picking Kaoru up and sitting down with him in his lap in one swift motion. “Okay then.. Can I kiss you then?”

“You don’t need to ask.” he smiles at him, cupping his cheek and leaning in to his sweet kiss. In the time they’d been together, well over a decade, the spark to his kisses never changed.

“So then, if you don’t want to answer you don’t have to, why bring it up now?”

“I felt like I was keeping it from you… And I don’t want to keep anything from you because I love you.”

“Except your own plate of carbonara.”

“Well if you didn’t make it so well I wouldn’t have to keep it from you now would I?”

“If I didn’t make it so well I’d be out of a job and a marriage.”

“You’re right, terrible carbonara is a reason for divorce.” Kaoru snickers, pressing his head against Kojiro’s. “I love you, you know that?”

“I love you too.” he whispers, kissing his cheek and rubbing his back. “Now.. Eat some bruschetta.” he grunts, picking up a piece of the bread and holding it out to him.

Kaoru shakes his head at him and rolls his eyes, opening his mouth to take a bite while cupping his hand beneath his mouth to catch the crumbs. He loved Kojiro with all of his heart, and thanked god every day they had one another. He’d been his from the day they met, and knowing that it didn’t matter to Kojiro was more comforting than anything.

[teamhappyme]

a series of promising events (3/5)

aaron hotchner x female!reader

word count: 6.4k 

a/n: part 3! thank you so much for all the love and support on the first 2 parts! hope you guys enjoy this part, because these are 2 of my favorite criminal minds episode. some themes, cases, dialogue taken directly from the show (S04 EP03, & S07 EP24).

also, if you’ve interacted with previous parts, first of all, thank you thank you. second, i have added you to the tag list. if you want to be removed, just let me know! :)

alright friends, let’s go!

here are the links to part 1 & part 2

****

June 2011

You were stupid. It always amazed you how you made it this far in your life with the amount of stupid situations you put yourself in. You kept pressure on the six inch gash running up your calf, lucky enough to tie off some of the wound by tearing off part of your pant leg. But you were still stuck in this goddamn compound, ready for the place to blow any second.

It was supposed to be a simple undercover interview and investigation. You and Spencer were among victims in an underground cult accused of child abuse. You’d been there all of two hours before the local SWAT team attempted to raid the compound, and an additional two before they found out the FBI was there.

Reid played dumb at first, trying to deny the accusations the best he could. But when they held two guns to his head, you were quick to offer up a confession.

“Get up.”

Cyrus led you to the storage room and kicked the shit out of you. You consider yourself a strong woman, you’d endured a lot of emotional trauma in your childhood, and in your time with the BAU, some scars on your body. But nothing to the extent of a narcissistic self proclaimed prophet who felt the power slipping through his fingers. 

You’d counted the kicks to your abdomen; there were three. Two punches to the face, and one shove to the concrete wall resulting in a broken mirror. It was safe to say you’d earned your stripes today. 

After your brief meeting with the congregation, and quickly assuring Spencer you were okay, you were locked back up in your room. Luckily, you were still mic'd up. 

Your hands were bound behind your back, so you kicked up the shade with the heel of your boot. 

“If you can hear me, I know you're coming. I can try to get the women and children to the tunnel, but I need to know when you’re coming.”

You repeated this like a mantra for fifteen minutes, praying that they could still hear you. “I need to know when you’re coming.”

With one more flick of the shade, the red laser from a sniper shown on your bedroom wall. “Okay, okay I see you. I need to know what time.” The light blinks three times, and you can feel your heartbeat rising. “Three a.m.?” Up and down, like nodding their head. “Understood. Reid is somewhere on the first floor with Cyrus, please find him.” 

Before closing your eyes from the excruciating pain your ribs were in from talking, the laser moved again. It took you a few seconds to decipher what they were trying to tell you, but after the third trace, you could barely let out a laugh. It was a check mark. 

“Thanks Hotch. A point for you.” You heard the sound of scurried footsteps running up the stairs, and you quickly put your foot down on the bed. “Someone's coming.”

It was Jane, coming in to check on your injuries again. She helped you sit up, guiding the glass of water she brought in to your mouth. 

“Cyrus is planning a mass suicide.” Her eyes widened as she pulled the glass away from you. “You made that 911 call.”

“This is all my fault. None of this would be happening if I hadn't made that call.” 

“You were trying to protect your daughter.”

She shook her head. “There were other girls before Jessie. He married them. And then when she came running to me for my consent, all I wanted was to take her and run. But I knew she wouldn’t leave without him.”

“This isn’t your fault.” You held one of her hands, needing her to understand this more than anything. “The FBI is coming at three a.m. I need you to gather Jessica, the kids, the other women, and get them into the basement just before three a.m.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

You sighed. Because I’ve been in your position before, you thought. You’ve been the scared follower in the corner of the room, praying for someone to save you while doing nothing. Until you finally took action, and attempted to save yourself and the people you cared about.

“Because I have faith that you are a strong enough woman to do the right thing for Jessica.” She stood up, not being able to look at you before she exited the room. 

Rationally, you knew there was a low chance you were getting out of here unscathed from the blast. There was no way you’d leave until everyone was out of the building, and you had found Spencer. But having your hands tied up locked in a secret room was not the easiest place to escape. 

You tried not to think of the fatal end of the day. You tried not to think of the fact that you were thirty years old, three months from turning thirty one, and had yet to travel on a plane for fun. You tried not to focus on all of your shortcomings, because there were many. Instead, you focused on the fact that your team was half a mile up the hill, waiting to safely bring you out.

What felt like only ten minutes later, Jane had come back to the room, quickly motioning for you to stand up. 

“You were right. They’re setting the place to blow up. I told Jessie Cyrus wanted her to gather the women and children in the basement.” She untied your hands, and you rolled your wrists a few times to get the mobility back.

“Where is the man I came in with?”

“He’s in the chapel with Cyrus. It’s two forty-five though, we gotta hurry.” She led you out of the room and down to the basement. There was an immense pounding in your head with every step you took, but you tried to push it away as you ushered the women down.

You could hear the tac team approaching, and made sure you were the first one in the basement to make sure it was safe. When you saw Derek’s face, you let out the breath you’d been holding. 

“Y/n, you okay?” He grabbed a hold of your elbow, helping you down the steps. 

“They’ve wired explosives.”

“Where’s Reid?” 

“He’s in the chapel with Cyrus.” You placed a hand over your forehead, the pounding settling in over your right eye. 

Derek rested a hand on your back, trying to lead you out of the compound. “We’ve gotta get you out of here.”

“No, not without Reid!”

A scream directed your’s and Derek’s attention to Jane, trying to stop Jessica from leaving the basement. “No!” 

“Ma’am, we’ll get her for you.” I held onto her shoulders, making sure she focused on me. 

“I’ll get her for you Jane. Derek, take her out.”

“L/n,” He warned, not ready to have two agents back in the line of fire.

“Take her out of this building so I can get her daughter and Reid!” You exclaimed, pushing Jane to follow Derek out. He relented, knowing he couldn’t talk you out of this. 

The SWAT team led you through the basement this time, following the sound of Jessica’s footsteps. The team took out two of Cyrus’s goonies, as you yelled for them to take a left to the chapel. You were closing in, and you could hear their voices. 

Cyrus had Spencer pinned against the wall, rifle to his chest, as Jessie and her daughter walked into the chapel. She got Cyrus’s attention as he kneed Reid in the gut twice with the butt of the rifle.

But before he could reach his family, your team took him and his second hand out. You raced over to the girls, trying to pull them away from the site of Cyrus’s dead body. But Jessica stayed in place, eyes trained on it. 

“We gotta go, sweetheart. Cmon.”

Her eyes shifted to yours for a second before looking at her feet, the yellow detonator lying next to her shoes. She grabbed it before you had a chance to reach forward, her shaky hands trying to hold on. 

“Get out of here!” You yelled out to the team, turning to make sure Spencer followed your order too. Jessie looked down at the button again as you reached for her two year old daughter, making sure she wouldn’t get hurt. “Please, don’t do this. You don’t need to follow him anymore.”

A single tear fell down her cheek, and you knew this was only going to end one way. You backed up towards the exit as she looked at you one more time. 

“He’s my husband.”

After those words, you picked up the toddler and ran out of the chapel, making it halfway down the walkway before it exploded. It threw you to the ground, but you made sure it was you who collided with the pavement, grasping onto her head to make sure she didn’t crack it.

The moments after were quiet, surprisingly enough. Everyone is always stunned to silence for a few seconds after witnessing such an event. But you barely had time to sit up and let out a proper cough before you heard Hotch and Prentiss calling your name. 

“I’m okay. I have the baby, we’re okay.” They knelt down next to you as you felt the cut on your forehead open up again. 

“Y/n,” 

“Take the baby!” I handed her over to Hotch, not wanting to look at anyone besides Spencer. 

“L/n,” 

“Where is Reid? Did he make it out?” You tried to look around Emily to find him, but she held your shoulders in place. 

“He’s fine Y/n. He’s getting checked out by a paramedic. C’mon, you need to go to the hospital.”

“No, I need-”

“You need to listen to me.” She offered you her hand, and as the adrenaline started to wear off and the pulsing in your leg came back, you took it. “Okay.”

Emily rode with you to the hospital just in case anything happened. But you were quick to shoo her out of your exam room once you got to the hospital. You needed a minute to yourself, and you were exhausted.

The doctor’s had cleared you to travel back to Virginia on the jet tonight, which was now early morning, but wanted you to get a few more hours of rest before heading out. They stitched up the cut on your leg, and diagnosed you with a minor concussion and a few bruised ribs. Lucky, to say the least.

Even though they gave you some pain meds to help you sleep, you were barely unconscious when you heard one of the hospital chairs scratch against the tile floor. Your eyes shot open, and you tried to sit up, forgetting about your bruised ribs. 

“Hey, take it easy,” You looked over to find Hotch sitting in one of the chairs, the cause of the scratching. “Are you alright?”

“Where’s Spencer?” You needed to find him and apologize for leaving him alone at the compound. “He’s in the waiting room, he’s a little bruised but he’s okay.”

You were successful in sitting up the second time, trying to get the blankets off your body. “I need to talk to him.” 

“You’re not going anywhere. You have a concussion, and you're highly medicated, so sit down.”

Hotch placed a hand on your arm in an attempt to get you to lie back down, but you fought against it, pushing him and the sheets away. 

He continued talking to you, trying to get you in a comfortable position and not cause any more pain to your pretty damaged body. But as he draped the sheet back over you, you began to feel suffocated by the room. 

“Hotch, I need to tell him I’m sorry,” The sheets were scratching your legs, and the increased beeping on your heart monitor increased the anxiety in your already restricted chest. Wait, how was the baby? Did you get her to safety? “The baby, Jessie’s baby,” You closed your eyes, not able to finish your sentence as the pounding returned over your left eye.

“Y/n,” 

“I can’t breathe Hotch. My lungs,” Your eyes started to water, your mind trying to think of a physical explanation to what was really going on. You were having a panic attack. “Fuck, I can’t-” You were hyperventilating now, your hands resting on your chest, trying to calm your breathing down.

“Look at me,” Hotch asked. But you closed your eyes to focus on something else, anything else, and you refused to open them back up. “I can’t.” 

All you could see was Spencer’s face as Cyrus took you away from him. His wide eyes, full of terror for you and for him. You saw the smile on Cyrus’s face as he threw you to the floor. You saw Jessica take her daughter’s hand, ready to kill themselves just to fulfill Cyrus’s prophecy. And you saw the look in Jane’s face as they told her it was Jessica who didn’t survive. After you told her you would get her daughter out. 

“I can’t,” You felt the tears escape your eyes before you registered what was happening, your shoulders starting to shake in unison. 

But you felt two arms snake around your body, pulling you into a tight embrace. You tensed for a moment, acknowledging the blue and white dress shirt under your fingers as Hotch’s. Instead of saying anything, you tucked your chin on top of his shoulder, trying to find some purchase to rest your head. You focused on his breathing as he chose to stay silent, letting you settle the thoughts in your head. 

And after a couple minutes, it worked. You know that the baby was taken to an ambulance to get checked out before you. You saw Spencer walk out of the chapel thirty seconds before you. And you could feel yourself breathing in this hospital bed, having successfully matched your breathing to Hotch’s. 

Hotch. 

At the acknowledgement of his arms secured around your middle, your heart picked up a little.

In the six years you’d spent with him as your unit chief, you’d never embraced him like this before. At Haley’s funeral you gave him a quick, respectful hug. In close calls involving the team, you’d give each other a comforting pat on the shoulder. But nothing to this extent. There wasn’t an inch of space between the two of you. You could smell his cologne without even trying, and you could feel the muscles in his shoulders soften underneath his dress shirt. You were so close to him. 

Too close.

“Hotch,” You muttered out, your voice a little hoarse from the crying. His grip loosened on your waist, like he forgot what was happening and where you were. 

“Don’t call me Hotch while you’re lying in a hospital bed. It’s Aaron.”

You could feel a slight tug at the corner of your lips as you pulled away from him. You’d never called him by his first name, at least never to his face. It felt intimate in a way you’d never been with him before. The name was a key to his past, opening the gate to his life outside of the BAU. Into his life as Aaron Hotchner, father, brother, soccer coach, Jack’s best friend. A life you loved to catch snippets of.

“Are you okay?” He asked again, once you were settled back against your pillows. He’d only asked you a million times since you woke up. “Why do you need to apologize to Reid?”

You let out a sigh. “Because I left him alone in that compound. I split us up, I put fifty innocent lives in danger and a child died because of it.”

“If you didn’t fess up to Cyrus, you would both be dead right now. Reid got into his good graces and helped save those fifty innocent people. As for Jessica,” He sighed. “She made up her mind. And there was nothing you could’ve said that would’ve changed it.”

You nodded before closing your eyes, trying to let the truth seep into your bones. 

“You’re so much stronger than you think, y/n. You took a beating like that and still managed to assure us that you could take it. I was ready to move in once I heard him throw you to the ground.” He was picking at his fingernails and you looked over at him. “You don’t give yourself enough credit for all the shit you accomplish.”

“Thank you, Aaron.” He’d become deaf to the tenderness ever present in his voice, but he wouldn’t forget the sound of his name rolling off your tongue for as long as he lived. He didn’t know how he survived six years without hearing you say it. But it wasn’t the time or place to delve into how it made him feel. So, he settled for a smile. One that made his dimples shine. 

“Y/n?” You looked over to the door, your gauky doctor standing in the doorway. “How are you?”

“I’m okay.” You motioned for him to come into the room, and he slowly made his way over to your side. You made space for him on the bed, but he didn’t move to sit next to you. “Spence, it’s okay. Take a seat.”

“I don’t want to hurt you.” His voice was so quiet, and you knew he felt as much guilt for letting you go as you did for leaving him. “I shouldn’t have let you go. I should’ve stopped him.”

You heard Hotch stand up from his seat, but you were only focused on Spencer. You pulled his hands down, begging him to sit down next to you. He got the hint, trying to hide the miniscule amount of tears forming in his eyes. 

But you placed your arms around him instead, not wanting him to apologize over and over until you accepted. Because this wasn’t his fault. “I’m sorry for leaving you. But I didn’t want you to get hurt. This wasn’t your fault. I need you to know this wasn’t your fault.” You felt him nod his head against your shoulder, and let out a breath that sounded too similar to a laugh. It only got one out of Spencer in return.

You met Hotch’s eye over Spencer’s shoulder, giving you a nod before letting the two of you have your moment. 

You pulled away, both your faces dry despite the wavering voices. One small victory. 

“Next time, let me take the beating.” You smiled as you tried to stand up out of the bed, having a clear head making all the difference this time around.

“Let’s hope there isn’t a next time. Now c'mon,” You pointed to your go bag and walked toward the bathroom. “Hand me that so we can get the hell out of this place.”

****

May 2012

The last thirty-six hours had been a whirlwind. You were exhausted, and the last thing you wanted to be doing was putting makeup and high heels on to go to a party. Your bed was calling you, ready for you to take refuge under the fluffy covers. But one of your best friends was getting married, and nothing was going to stop you from being there for JJ.

When she walked down the aisle in her mother’s wedding gown, she looked ethereal. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think weddings were made with the image of Jennifer Jareau looking like an angel in mind. With Spencer’s help, Henry gave his parents their wedding bands, a smile on his face as they shared their first kiss as husband and wife. And no matter how hard you and Garcia tried, you couldn’t keep the tears from flowing down your face. Weddings, like most everything, got you to cry.

Now an hour later, you were taking a rest at the round table Rossi had set up for the small occasion. His backyard was transformed with white canopies and flower petals, the small dance floor in full swing. You sat down once you reached your chair, letting out a sigh of relief. Dancing with Jack Hotchner had worn out your heel clad feet, making you regret the decision not to wear flats. 

Despite the events of the last few days, everyone seemed to be happy and enjoying a night free of anxiety. It was one of the few times you’d seen Erin Strauss crack a smile around your BAU team members, and you hoped it would last a little longer once you were back in the office. It was nice to see Anderson and Kevin outside of the bullpen, getting to talk about something other than serial killers and last known whereabouts. It felt like a normal family, celebrating two people that they all loved. 

Weddings always made you believe in the bigger picture. Despite all the evil in the world, the amount of love two people shared with one another would always conquer it all. And weddings like these, between two people who put their lives on the line everyday, made you believe that you could find this source of happiness, this lifetime commitment despite everything you’ve gone through. It had to give you hope.

But as you rested your sweater over your shoulders and looked out at the couples sharing a dance, you couldn’t help but notice the empty feeling in your heart. 

“Hey party pooper, you tired already?” Spencer took the seat to your left, a toothy grin resting on his face. He looked incredibly handsome tonight in his black suit and bowtie, a break from his sweaters and khakis. He had blushed red as a tomato when you and Penelope complemented his look, trying to boost his confidence. And maybe embarrass him a bit. “You’re the youngest one here minus the toddlers and you’re the first one to tap out. I had my money on Rossi.”

You laughed while skimming your feet against the tips of the grass. “I’m resting up for my turn with Derek. He told me I’m not leaving this place until he sees me, and I quote, ‘cut up a rug’ with him.” 

Morgan and Garcia were currently the life of the dance floor, moving in sync with one another as best friends do. Your smile always grew when you witnessed the two of them together. 

“You did a good job with your groomsmen duty. Didn’t lose the rings, made sure Henry knew his job. Maybe you’ll be number one on JJ’s babysitting speed dial.”

“And surpass you? That'll be the day that animals speak.” You nodded, a small smile gracing your lips. “Glad you know your place.”

The two of you looked up to see Rossi and Strauss dancing together, and you raised your brows toward Spencer. He informed you what him and Penelope witnessed a few mornings ago, and the three of you were determined to find out what the relationship was between the wise father figure and section chief. But as long as he was happy, you really couldn’t care less.

“Has Emily found you yet?” You asked, afraid to be the first to approach the subject. After her last disappearance, it took Spencer a while to forgive her and JJ. The grieving process was hard for him, it was hard for all of you. He spent weeks at JJ’s house, guilt consuming him for not putting together the link between Lauren Reynolds and Prentiss. He blamed himself just as much as Derek did. And he missed the one person who could see through him, and crush him at poker. 

“Yeah, she did.” 

“And are you okay?”

“I will be.” He looked over at me, a sad smile on his face. “At least we can call her this time.”

You were happy that Spencer could look back on Emily’s ‘death’ and laugh about it with you. There was a silver lining to every situation, every experience we go through. At least, that’s what you told yourself to help you get through the hard days.

“What about you?” You looked over at him, a wrinkle between your brows. 

“Hmm?”

He sighed and nudged his head to the dance floor. “You really expect me to believe you didn’t come over here to sit and sulk while watching Hotch and Beth dance the night away?”

Your eyes found their way to the couple, swaying back and forth with smiles that couldn’t help but be contagious. A smile that only you used to be able to get from Hotch. And that little reminder was all it took for your smile to fall.

Hotch had introduced you all to Beth three months ago at the triathlon. They’d been training together for a few months until Hotch got the nerve to ask her out the week before the big day, with a little push from Dave nonetheless. She was the first woman he’d seen after Haley, a little over two years since her death. You were proud of him for moving on, and you were happy that he’s enjoying his life guilt free. 

Beth was a beautiful woman, both inside and out. She was an art curator who ran triathlons and went to cute coffee shops in her free time. Anyone would be crazy not to be enamored by her. She kept Aaron on his toes, pushing him when he needed to go out of his comfort zone, an easy balance between the two of them. She was amazing with Jack, camping out and making forts with the two boys in the apartment. The little boy was more than okay with the new woman in his father's life.

But with the addition of Beth in Hotch’s life, your presence wasn’t as frequent as it used to be. Friday game nights had disappeared along with Saturday dinners, replaced by date night and movies with Jack. The worried phone calls about a cold, or the rush for a babysitter were now directed to Beth. The pictures of Jack playing with legos or running in the park now came from JJ when there was a scheduled playdate with Henry. You had been placed back into your spot as coworker, SSA y/n l/n of the BAU.

“I’m happy for him.” You settled on the vague truth, because you weren’t going to make tonight about you and your bruised feelings. “She’s a wonderful woman and he deserves to be happy.”

“So do you.” Yeah, you thought, I do.

“You know when I was a little girl, I used to dream about my future. It was the only thing that kept me going when I moved from home to home.” You admitted with a shallow laugh. “When you’re little, you have no perception of time, or any obstacles life throws in your way. And I think I wanted to believe more than anything, that life outside of the system was going to be magical. No matter what advantages or disadvantages I faced, I was going to make it magical.

“When I was fifteen, I thought I would be married and have popped out a baby by the time I was thirty. I told myself I would find my husband in college, a nice boy with big ambitions that loved me right. I would have a desk job, maybe be a secretary, something that gave me some interaction with people. We’d buy a house in the suburbs somewhere with window boxes and a big backyard. We’d have three or four kids by the time I was thirty five, and they would fill the house with their giggles and tiny footsteps. My job would be flexible enough so that they wouldn’t have to spend the whole day in daycare. I was going to be the perfect mother.

“I had it all planned out,” Your voice fell off as you looked back at Spencer. “But here I am at thirty one years old. Single, childless, pining over a man I can’t have, while trying not to get blown up by psychotic serial killers everyday.” 

You couldn’t help yourself, stealing another look at Hotch. It nearly broke your heart in two to see his dimple from across the lawn.

“And fifteen years later, I’m still putting other people’s happiness before my own.” You stood up, placing your sweater back on your chair. Spencer had scolded you time and time again that you were going to be destroyed if you kept up this caring charade. Hotch had even tried to warn you about your efforts early on, but you were a stubborn girl. Looking back at Spencer, you hated seeing the pity he held for you in his eyes. You never wanted to be this girl. “But I’m happy for him.”

So you put on your most convincing smile, and motioned for him to follow you to the dance floor. He was hesitant, but he knew better than to continue his interrogation after your round about explanation. This wasn’t the place to delve into your mind. And the two of you knew that.

As soon as you stepped onto the dance floor, you were calling out for Derek Morgan to show you his moves. You needed a distraction, and you needed to have some fun. He wrapped his arms around you lightly, implying that you would not be slowly swaying like the boring people surrounding you. 

He led you into what felt like a quickstep, bringing you up and down your side of the floor, leading you like a professional. You couldn’t stop the laughs from spilling out of your mouth as he spun you around and twirled you right back into his chest. Skipping around the dance floor with Derek was the last thing you expected to be doing at JJ’s wedding, but you were more than happy with the outcome. 

After a few songs with the next Fred Astaire, Emily dragged you over to JJ, attempting a trio sway. Garcia joined you after a moment, giggles being shared across the square of dancing women. These three ladies were the sisters you prayed for as a kid, and you were about to be one man down for the first time in six years. For real, this time. 

You leaned to your left and pressed a kiss to Emily’s cheek, and she smiled. “Are you making a move on me?” 

Penelope let out a laugh as you shook your head. “I’m just grateful to have had you in my life for this long.” The smirk on her face fell, and you swear there were tears in her eyes. 

“Nope! I was promised there would be no crying tonight,” Garcia stopped the moment from turning into a goodbye, and you laughed. “Sorry, you’re right. It was a move.”

JJ shook her head as Emily held your eyes for another second, mouthing a ‘thank you’ to you. You gave her a nod as JJ spun you under her arm.

“Alright, even though you're hitched, you can still come to ladies night with us, right?” Penelope asking the important questions here. 

You smiled as JJ nodded. “You couldn’t keep me away if you tried.”

After a few more chords, there was a tap on your shoulder. You looked over your shoulder, finding Hotch’s warm brown eyes already looking at you. Your feet stopped as a shy smile rested across his lips. 

“Hey,” 

“Hey. Sorry to break up this party, but,” He extended his hand to you. “Would you like to dance?”

You looked down to his hand, one that you held so tight after Haley’s death, and took it in your own. Yours was swallowed in his, but you didn’t mind one bit.

“Of course.” He backed up, leading the two of you away from the laughing girls. 

Once you’d found your own space, he wrapped his free hand around your waist, bringing yours to rest on his shoulder. Always the gentleman, his hand made sure it was barely grazing your lower back as your heart ached for him to hold you closer.

“Dave did an amazing job with the place.” Hotch commented, trying to break the tension between you. It had never felt this awkward between the two of you, and it hurt to know how much had changed. 

“I think you mean Rossi found a great party planner to transform the place.”

A light chuckle from Hotch, and you felt butterflies in your stomach as his dimples showed up. You wanted to trace a check mark on his shoulder, but stopped when you realized he had someone else that was in first place now. The same person who was dancing with his son across the floor. 

“He really likes her.” You commented, nodding towards the pair. Beth twirled Jack under her arm once, twice, three times, before he broke into a fit of giggles. 

“He does. He claims she’s the best Uno player alive.”

You forced a smile out, not wanting to give the wrong impression. “High praise coming from the reigning champion.” He laughed and nodded along, knowing Jack did not accept defeat so easily. She must be really special. 

Being this close to Aaron felt like a dream, one that you never thought you would get to experience while you were awake. The only other time you got to enjoy his warmth was a year ago, when you’d evaded another explosion. You remembered the feeling of his arms looped around your waist, their grip holding you to his chest. Once you realized what was happening, you never wanted to leave his embrace. 

But right now you weren’t close enough. And selfishly, you needed to be closer, you needed to be held like that one more time. You took a step closer to him in between your swaying, your right foot in between his. Without missing a beat, he took another step closer to bridge the gap between you, pulling your joined hands to his opposite shoulder. 

“I didn’t know you knew ballroom dancing,” His voice was deeper than you ever heard, due to the miniscule distance between you. If you tilted your head to the left a few centimeters, you’d be leaning against his temple. Just the thought had your heart racing; this man was not yours. 

“I don’t. But Derek Morgan is a good teacher.”

You continued to sway back and forth to the music, a ballad playing in the background as you caught Beth dancing with Rossi now. She was a walking reminder that Aaron Hotchner was in a happy, committed relationship. And no matter how close you danced with him, how perfectly his arm curled tighter and tighter around your waist, this was not yours. 

All you wanted was to share your life with someone. You wanted someone to look at you the same way Will looked at JJ. You wanted someone to make you laugh so hard that you couldn’t breathe. Someone who cared for you, just as much as you cared for everyone else. You wanted, more than anything in your life, for Aaron to look at you the way you looked at him. 

“Are you okay?” He must have felt your grip tighten around his shoulder, and you quickly relented. 

Tears had started to form in your eyes, and you gently shook your head to keep them from falling. “Yeah, sorry.”

He pulled back the slightest bit, trying to look into your diverting eyes. You locked them on the canopied walkway, hoping they’d dry before he came into view. It wasn’t his responsibility to ease your worries.

“Y/n,” You bit the inside of your lip, moving to crack your index finger when he slowed the two of you down a little. He knew your tells better than anyone else. “You can tell me anything.”

You didn’t hesitate to meet his eyes, smiling when you saw the concern etched inside them. You knew how much he cared for you. How much he trusted you with his son, and with his own worries when he had no one to turn to. You knew that he would do anything to take away the pain you’re feeling right now. So that’s why you let your smile grow, to assure him that you were going to be okay. That he couldn’t know why you were falling apart. 

So you repeated the words you made yourself believe, leaving his gaze only to find Spencer’s a few feet away. 

“I’m just really happy for you, Aaron.” 

It was an ambidextrous statement, one that made your head spin with the different ways to approach the situation. But before he could respond, Spencer had made his way over to the two of you, perfectly reading the stare you threw his way. You needed an out.

“I think it’s my turn with the dancing queen.” 

You let go of Hotch without a second thought, never meeting his gaze again. Spencer took your hand without a fight, and led you to the far corner of the floor, away from everyone’s eyes. You felt your chest tightening as he wrapped his arms around you, knowing the tears you tried so hard to suppress would fall soon. 

The two of you started swaying, and you were quick to rest your head on his shoulder in an attempt to hide the first few tears that fell. You focused on the sound of heels meeting the floor, the silverware chiming against the plates, and the occasional laugh that escaped JJ’s mouth. You tried to ground yourself to the present, not to your thoughts.

“The life that you have may not be the one you dreamed of as a kid, but it’s pretty damn special. You don’t need kids or a husband to complete you. Because the y/n l/n right here,” he poked your waist, eliciting a small smile from you, “Is the best version of any day dream.”

You lifted your head from his shoulder so that you could meet his eyes. His smile never failed to reach his eyes, causing more tears to fall as you registered the sincerity in his voice.

“I’m going to be okay, right?” Your voice was small, afraid that you would never get used to this feeling.

“I don’t know,” He said before stepping back, just enough to spin you under his arm, and pull you back just like Derek had, before gently dipping you down. You couldn’t believe the laugh that escaped your lips, the salty tears ending their path down your face for good he hoped. He brought you back up carefully, a beautiful Spencer Reid smile adorning his face. “But I’ll be with you until you are.”

****

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