#these books own my whole heart
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itslianaiguess · 2 years ago
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reading the locked tomb series is so interesting because it's all fun and games until suddenly it's an unsteady "griddle" and the end of a wedding vow and then it's "harrowhark, i gave you my whole life and you didn't even want it" and then i'm on the floor, sobbing
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fellamarsh · 1 month ago
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another thing i've been trying to do recently is read more self-published stuff. "but fell," you say, "you're a self-published author. surely you've been reading self-published stuff all along" and then i laugh for so long in response we both become uncomfortable.
see, the fear (which has for a long time been killing my mind) that i'll read other self-published stuff and find out that it's so much better than mine that i might as well stop writing forever kept me from doing that basically ever. i have a hard time not unfavorably comparing my work to others and had convinced myself i was being smart by withholding an avenue of de-motivation (reader: i was not being smart). it also doesn't help that i'm pretty low income and have a hard time spending money on books i haven't already read, and that self-published stuff isn't always available at the library---but really a lot of it was just me being a coward. which i'm working on. i could talk about how this particular cowardice is Very Silly, but i think enough has been said about it on writeblr and in the Writing Space in general that i don't feel the need to (though i will if anyone wants me to).
instead, i wanna talk about the self-published things i have read in the past few months and ask about the self-published things you love!
so: what happened was i got real sick, and while i was real sick i (naturally) read over 200,000 words of ace attorney fan fiction in the span of a few days. eventually i got bored of it (and also maybe annoyed at how people were characterizing some of my guys), but i still wanted to read something gay and romantic and nice, something i knew was gonna end happily, which isn't my typical fare.
now you may be saying (having gotten over all the uncomfortable laughter from earlier) "fell, you write gay romance. what do you mean that's not your typical fare?" listen. until a couple months ago i hadn't read a cut and dry romance novel since before i finished college. for context: i graduated in 2015. i know it doesn't make sense. i'm a guy who doesn't make sense.
but in this case it worked to my advantage. not the not making sense thing, but the not having read Published Romance in 1000 years thing. I didn't know where to start. I was very skeptical of everything the library had Available Now in the Gay Fantasy Romance category. what if it was all bad and also not good?
and then i scrolled past the familiar cover of our very own @ashen-crest's A Rival Most Vial.
now this was comfortable territory! this was a novel by a very nice writeblr person whose posts i enjoy! i already loosely knew the plot, i was familiar with the characters, i knew the names of things like rosemond street and the griffin's claw and that ambrose had blue hair and that at the end of it all there would definitely be Boyfriends. i didn't have to worry that this would be bad! i only had to worry that it would be really good!
but i wasn't worried about that, because i was officially Not Writing at the time, and because why the hell hadn't i read this book yet Ash literally emailed me some very kind words last year when my cat died??
Y'all, I devoured ARMV. If you haven't read it yet---especially if cozy fantasy is more your thing than it is mine---you should check it out Immediately. It was fun! It was heartwarming! It was sweet and earnest and confident! I was delighted to find it was occasionally hot! Ambrose and Eli snuggled up into my sick exhausted heart and found a permanent little place there. (Especially Ambrose. I have such a thing for Stiff Guys who Kind of Suck for Tragic Backstory Reasons and are So So Lonely They Don't Even Realize It. gawd)
(And a very small part of my brain spent the whole time wondering why I had been so afraid to really engage with the work my community is doing. The community that I'm in. The one I'm a part of. Why?! Maybe more on that later.)
But from there the curse was broken! I immediately devoured @stjohnstarling's What Manner of Man in a similar sort of frenzy (and hooooly shit guys am I excited for the expanded, finalized version to come out at the end of next month!) and started digging into @lurinatftbn's The Flower that Bloomed Nowhere (which I can already tell is going to be an All Time Favorite).
And now I want to ask you what your favorite self-published books are so that I can read them, too, but I think I will in another post that doesn't dedicate so much space to talking about my various and sundry Issues and isn't Terminally Long
#my god the library. darling. beloved. breath of my life and heart of my soul.#i should make a post about her#also. and maybe i'll make a separate post about this at some point too#but i truly think the free serialized webnovel rough draft ala What Manner of Man is The Future#i should probably make a whole separate post about all these novels too tbh.#boutta become Posting Guy. The Guy Who Posts#and writes novels in the tags. but i've always been like that#i never talked about the dream i had where i was emry karic from the lutesong series did i? i totally meant to. fucked up!#so i had a dream where i was emry karic.#I (emry karic) was fleeing a bunch of elves in a forest with my mom and sister (who were fully my irl mom and sister)#they thought i had done a murder and were chasing me (emry karic) with spears and stuff. they almost caught me#but i managed to escape. later i came upon a weird old-timey fantasy carnival.#and for some reason one of the fun attractions at this carnival was A Day in Court#where you watch someone defend themselves in court.#you'll never guess who had to defend himself in court and what the charges were!#notably there were no other characters from the lutesong series involved.#and i also have yet to read any of the books in the lutesong series. emry and his flower crown simply invaded my brain out of nowhere#i thought about turning this post into separate posts or rewriting it or smthn because it's so long and all over the place but#that sort of defeats the whole trying to just post and not be so up my own ass about it that i never actually post thing#so here you go#if you are also someone who struggles or once struggled with reading other people's stuff because of self esteem issues. hi!#we're now spidermen pointing at each other
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albatris · 6 months ago
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either today was a bizarre fluke or this new medication is going to be a gamechanger
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veeva-i0i · 5 months ago
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Shadowhunters has such weird differences from the books. For one, the story behind Valentine and the Circle was so much more interesting in the books. How he helped put people like Hodge and Luke, and how he betrayed the bond he and Luke had.
But the biggest shock to me was how they portrayed the institute. It wasn't supposed to be that modern with all the tech and shit, but more importantly, it wasn't supposed to be that densely populated. In the first book, it was literally just Hodge, Alec, Izzy, and Jace living there, because Robert, Maryse, and Max were in Idris. The teens were the only shadowhunters there who could actually leave, so they had to step up and go on the missions. Which left Hodge in the perfect position to canoodle against the Clave and help Valentine out. It was such a perfect setup for Hodge being on Valentine's side all along, and the show took that away.
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myheartissetinmotion · 3 months ago
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sam reid percy blakeney WHEN
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longagoitwastuesday · 3 months ago
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I am liking Jujutsu Kaisen, way more than I imagined I would, but I foresee it will let me down and it's keeping me from enjoying this as much as I could haha
I think the characters and dynamics are well set, and I think many of them have an incredibly good and deep potential, but I would be willing to bet they'll not get a proper development, enough for them to really hit. A well assembled set of gears is not enough to make the movement go, you have to wind the clockwork.
I think Gojo and Megumi have a fascinating and very complex dynamic, but I doubt it will be given the time and care that imo it needs to actually work. And it is going well enough for now! One could see the intimacy between them was deeper than the one Gojo had with, say, Yuji and Nobara ever since the very first few episodes despite the fact Fushiguro too was a first year. But the pieces forming what they have are extremely complex, and it just wouldn't be realistic if it doesn't show, even if in a not showing way, or if it doesn't have consequences or implications.
It's one of those dynamics that shape one's life, the way one regards the world, the way one establishes or not relationships with other people. It's one of those dynamics that could be full of fondness, gratitude, resentment, admiration, trust, and that imply intimacy, the good kind or the bad, even if in just the knowledge of someone who's been a constant through your life. It could, and would, imply a myriad of feelings, and probably in such a mix it could imply contradictory feelings too. Even the nothingness would weight, even the nothingness would be significant and meaningful.
Gojo took Megumi and his sister under his wing, the son of a man who murdered him, because of both selfish and selfless reasons. Megumi looks like Toji. What does Gojo feel about this? How does Gojo deal with this? How does Gojo go about taking care of Megumi? Would he walk him to school? Make him breakfast? Celebrate his birthdays making him blow candles? Did he take him to the zoo? Does the relationship between them feel professional or is it something more? Gojo appreciates his students, but is Megumi to him just another student? When Gojo faces Sukuna in Megumi's body, did he see the kid he raised, or does he just see Sukuna in one of his students' body? Did he have one faint wavering instant? And how does Megumi feel about this? Is he resentful of him? Resentful of the situation? Of the selfishness behind his actions? Does he feel like a pawn? Is he grateful? Does he resent feeling grateful? Would he rather not? Does he love Gojo? Does he feel nothing about him other than what he could feel about a teacher that sort of annoys him but knows he's reliable in his strength? Does he think it unfair, cruel or unfeeling that Gojo is close, closer perhaps, with Yuuji or Yuta, considering their story? When Sukuna slices Gojo in two, does the remnants of Megumi's soul tremble?
And not just Megumi and Gojo. Yuuji and Nanami, Gojo and Nanami, Yuuji and Fushiguro, Nobara and the boys, or Nobara and Maki, Todo and Yuuji or Yuta, Gojo and Yuta, Megumi and his sister. Gojo and Geto, even! If the pieces are well set, the dynamics are intriguing, interesting, and have potential to be deep, but then the characters have like two plot relevant scenes that punch you hard, but little more, it's not nearly enough. Especially not nearly enough for the enormity that is shonen dynamics and situations. And the potential existing at all, and then not delivering, makes it all the more frustrating when you're left with something mediocre that could have been so good.
The development of dynamics through not only a few plot relevant gut wrenching moving scenes, but also the smallness of life, is important. The friend who recommended this to me said that those things were just unnecessary filler, but I disagree. I think there's a big difference between a large amount of anime-only filler episodes whose existence is based on the fact they had run out of manga chapters to animate, and moments of quietness. The low stakes character-driven moments of quietness can be so telling and so insightful, and they are so satisfactory when brought back later in higher stakes situations. My friend teased me there was no scene of Gojo making breakfast to Megumi, that it would be an idiotic idea, but it would be so telling. How he makes breakfast, what they eat, if he tries hard or if it's all mechanised, if they have personal bowls or if they use whatever, if he just buys them some pastry on the way to school, if the way they have breakfast changes through the years, or if he doesn't make them breakfast at all! All that would be very insightful on their dynamic and its evolution. All that would give a glimpse on how they regard each other and why, even in the present. All that could become meaningful in tense situations and high stakes scenes.
These moments also let the plot breath; if a lot is happening all the time, if every character is always experiencing trauma after trauma, the entire story is so emotionally draining that at some point you don't even care all that much. Besides, these nothing moments or low stakes plot arcs, besides deepening and developing dynamics, also let some in-world time pass, which would make the intimacy and bond between characters more believable imo; between Yuuji eating Sukuna's finger and their last confrontation in December how much time has passed? A few months? Am I truly to believe these characters are so everything to each other in only a few months?
Without some smallness, some repetition, some daily life, some low stakes not plot-centric development, the dynamics don't hit, they don't truly feel fleshed out, and dynamics as complex as the ones Megumi and Gojo have, or as supposedly meaningful as the one Megumi has with Yuuji or his sister, should be fleshed out if they're going to exist at all. Otherwise they'd risk making the writing feel awkward and fake. Besides, if the dynamics felt well fleshed out and realistic, they would shape the way the characters interact and act, and how they deal with situations, thus being plot relevant.
The shonen genre has so much happening all the time, the stakes are so high, the dynamics are so rooted in big events and the relationships carry enormous weight and implications. Yet they barely get developed, and it feels so stupid, so plain, the absence of something so important noticeable like a constant void, a shapeless nothingness present in every scene. It makes the characters feel like cardboard figures. Jujutsu Kaisen is already getting a better job than many, but I doubt it will do enough for what I've heard, and I fear I am bound to feel let down, and bound to feel unmoved.
After all, if not enough time and care has been given to develop a dynamic, I am not going to feel pressured by the high stakes; if not enough time and care has been given to develop the dynamic between Megumi and Yuuji, as good potential as it has I am bound to feel little for this last confrontation between Sukuna and Itadori, and his effort in getting Megumi back.
#It's not that I think everything has to be character driven or take a lot of care about dynamics#Death Note for instance works well without it. There's juice in the dynamic between Light and his father and the role of Matsuda there#and it works well with Light's views and their evolution and the whole Kira situation. It isn't much. It doesn't need more#But Death Note doesn't truly drop something as big as Gojo and Megumi to then do barely nothing about it#('But L and Watari' not the same at all. That was deepened in the anime and besides Watari is not one of the main characters)#Or Megumi and his sister. If we see barely nothing of Megumi and his sister other than shiny flashbacks of her#how am I to feel moved by it all beyond superficial emotions? I don't know. It just feels so like cardboard to me#And it annoys me! It annoys me a lot! Because Jujutsu Kaisen has amazing potential! The dynamics and characters could be amazing!#But I don't trust they'll live to their full potential and the potential existing for nothing is ruining this for me xD#Jujutsu Kaisen#Sorry this time I'm tagging it. I want to find this and see if I was right when I'm finished. I think I'll read the manga too#The condescending filler breakfast comment by my friend was ironic considering the Kramer vs. Kramer breakfast scenes exist#Breakfast can be so telling. And besides he loves the Chainsaw Man coffee scene so I don't get why not breakfast#But truly some small daily life moments can tell us a lot about a character that we could recognise later on in high stakes scenes#such as how they deal in tense situations‚ what makes them snap#how they go about dealing with a problem.#Sometimes it could be smaller moments or conversations what makes characters reconsider things‚ not just having Sukuna rip their heart out#In Pandora Hearts the conversation between Elliot and Oz about the book series they love and their favourite characters becomes key#Oz's development and how he regards things‚ his own person‚ and how he deals with situations will be shaped later on by this conversation#till the very end. The entire main character's development is shaped by a 'filler' conversation.It's not filler. It's just not a fight scen#Shonen manga readers find everything filler except for fights which is ironic considering that many fights in shonen feel unnecessary#Breakfast is unnecessary. Just filler. Fighting thirty seven secondary monsters or chapter after chapter of physical training is not. Okay#Things can be small but plot relevant. If it shapes and fleshes out and deepens a character or a relationship it is not filler#And mainly MAINLY for the love of everything good if you're going to make a fucked up or Meaningful Beyond Everything dynamic#give it time and care. Actually write it. Don't give me two panels and one conversation after some life and death situation. It's not enoug#Especially if I'm to believe they are important. Make me believe they actually are#I don't know... This issue with not trusting the development of very well set potential in Jujutsu Kaisen#has not only been keeping me from thoroughly enjoying the series‚ but actively keeping me from watching for weeks#It makes me doubt if I want to spend my time in this at all since after all time is limited and we can but spend it in a handful of things#A pity. I really love some things and I really think Megumi and Gojo could be everything to me haha the Heathcliff/Hareton vibe gets me
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allsassnoclass · 6 months ago
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HELL YEAH!!! can i get uhhhh #9, an I'm so proud of you kiss? pairing, fandom, etc is all up to you :) ill read it even if im not in the fandom go fkn crazy ily xoxo
hi @clumsyclifford!!! alrighty let's throw some fake college sports players in here.
jerejean: I'm so proud of you kiss
Jeremy goes to find Jean after a few minutes, weaving through the crowd of his teammates and the Foxes until he reaches the edge of their party's sphere, out in the sand where the light from the bonfire has no hope of reaching. He stumbles over Neil and Andrew, drawn hypnotically to the bright cherry of the cigarette they're sharing, but neither of them question where he's going or make any attempt at conversation. Neil simply tilts his head to the left with a knowing look, and Jeremy nods in thanks once he spots the shadowy figure sitting yards away in the darkness, looking out at the waves.
Jean doesn't look up as Jeremy approaches, chin resting on his knees as he looks distantly out at the ocean, where the horizon line blends too deep in the darkness to discern what is sea and what is sky anymore. Jeremy flops gracelessly down next to him, kicking up sand and checking to be sure Jean isn't shying away. He relaxes when he doesn't. Jean still doesn't do well with isolation, but he's an introvert at heart and needs his space. After the events of today, Jeremy isn't surprised that he retreated down the beach to be alone, but he also knows that it's the kind of alone that Jeremy is welcome to interrupt.
It makes his chest fill with warmth, being one of the people that Jean doesn't need energy to be around. It's a privilege that he doesn't take lightly, especially when so few people in Jean's life have been safe. For him to have found a group of people to love and be loved by in return is no small feat, and it's something that they've gradually cultivated together in the past year.
For a moment, Jeremy thinks about the first time he saw Jean in person outside of a court, watching the shell of a man cautiously approach him at LAX with only a few t-shirts, a tattoo, and years of abuse to his name. He would never have predicted that they'd be here now, only a few weeks shy of a year later. Jean has grown in ways too numerous to list, but Jeremy has changed, too. It's a mutual metamorphosis, made more important for the way that they've grown in harmony with each other, filling in each other's gaps while leaving room for the other person to stretch and flourish.
Of course, one other difference is that they're NCAA champions now. It isn't a new title for Jean, but Jeremy suspects that this one feels sweeter, more earned.
This is a win that Jean should feel proud of, one untainted by the shadow of black wings and bruises. A championship that has nothing to do with the number that used to be tattooed on his face and everything to do with the person he has decided to become.
"What are you thinking about?"
Jeremy tilts his head towards the quiet, lilting sound of Jean's words. His accent has lessened slightly over the year, either due to less necessity to use his French without Kevin around or being surrounded by people who never stop talking in loud California drawls, but it still colors his words like a swash of blue in a sunrise.
Jean never wants to return to France, but sometimes Jeremy wonders if he would enjoy visiting Canada or Haiti, somewhere that he could use a version of his native language without ghosts following him.
"Jeremy?"
Jeremy blinks, bringing himself back to the present rather than some unnamed future with the two of them wandering around Montreal.
"I was thinking about our win," he says when he can remember what Jean's original question was. Jean huffs, but the sound is fond. Jeremy can't see much in the darkness, but he can picture Jean's expression perfectly. He's not smiling, but he's softer, relaxed and open enough that Jeremy can read his intention.
"How does it feel to be a champion?" Jean asks.
"Amazing," Jeremy sighs, tipping his head back and remembering every hour of practice and hard-fought game that brought them here. Despite the backlash from his decision to cut down the line last year and all of the negative press surrounding Jean's transfer, they made it all the way to the championships and came out on top. It was a battle in more ways than one, but it was absolutely worth it for the look on Kevin Day's face when Cat stole the ball from him using a technique that Jean taught her, then slammed the ball down the court for Jeremy to catch and score.
The team as a whole has grown exponentially. Jeremy has never pushed himself harder, and it wasn't all sunshine and smiles on the court this year. Still, they held it together, and as turbulent throwing a former Raven into their midst was, Jeremy has never regretted the decision to bring Jean to them.
"It's sweeter because I could do it with you," Jeremy says.
He glances at Jean out of the corner of his eye. He doesn't duck his head bashfully, and he doesn't freeze awkwardly the way he used to when Jeremy would drop a sappy but sincere compliment months ago. He simply lets the sentiment wash over him, keeping his focus on Jeremy.
"I'm glad you are happy," he says. Jeremy reaches for his hand, fingertips dragging along his forearm and wrist until Jean turns to thread their fingers together.
"What about you?" Jeremy asks. "How does it feel to be a champion this time?"
Jean takes time to consider his answer. Jeremy listens to the distant sounds of their teammates and friends over by the fire and the gentle sounds of waves hitting the shore while he waits. A breeze gently shifts his hair, light and crisp enough that he nearly shivers.
"I didn't think it would mean this much to me," Jean says quietly. Jeremy squeezes his hand once, then relaxes, giving Jean the space he needs. "I knew that winning with the Trojans would feel different, but the Ravens won because we were expected to. You and I won because we deserved to this time. Because we fought harder and wanted it more."
"And you did it all without a red card, even though Neil was being annoying," Jeremy says.
"It felt good to beat him," Jean grins. "That was very satisfying."
No one felt like it would be a good idea to make Jean block Kevin, not with everything he's told them about scrimmages in the Nest. While he played with Neil at Evermore as well, it was never while Neil was playing striker, and Neil only features in a fraction of the traumatic memories that Jean has recounted. Jean has been doing great in his sessions with Betsy and has grown a lot in his recovery over the past year, but no one wanted to risk prompting a flashback during the championship game, when the eyes of the entire public and Ichirou Moriyama would be on him.
Jean seemed to enjoy playing against Neil, anyway. Jeremy still doesn't understand their relationship and probably never will, but it was one of Jean's best games. Neil ran him ragged, but both of them seemed satisfied with their individual performances, and Jeremy overheard Jean tell him to have a winning day while stealing the ball at one point.
It's taken a long time for Jean to be able to have fun on the court. Healing is slow and non-linear, Jeremy knows that better than most. The progress that is visible, though, is much more gratifying because of it.
Jeremy looks at Jean, tracing his outline in the blue shadows. He takes in the relaxed slope of his shoulders, the enticing tilt of his head, the self-satisfied smile that Jeremy can barely see gracing his lips in this light. He looks like he belongs on this beach, relishing in his win with dozens of people who love him only a few yards away, holding hands with someone who adores him.
It's amazing, what a difference one year can make. Jeremy's chest feels warm and full, ready to burst.
"Hey," he says, squeezing Jean's hand. Jean turns towards him with a questioning noise. Jeremy tugs on his t-shirt, coaxing him forward until he can lean up to press their lips together. Jean responds once he catches on to Jeremy's intention, relaxing against him and sliding his free hand around Jeremy's waist. Jeremy presses forward, trying to transfer as much of the feeling in his chest to Jean as he can. He curls his hand around Jean's shoulder, partially to draw him closer and partially for his own stability. Jean sighs against him, and Jeremy can't help but smile into the kiss.
When they part a few moments later, Jeremy watches the way that Jean's eyes take a moment to flutter open.
"What was that for?" Jean asks. Jeremy smiles and brushes his thumb against Jean's cheek, right over the small heart tattooed there.
"I'm really proud of you," he smiles. Jean ducks his head, leaning into Jeremy's palm. "You've come a long way."
Jean wraps his hand around Jeremy's, pressing it against his chest.
"I couldn't have done it without you, Jeremy."
Jeremy doesn't think he'll ever get used to the way his name sounds in Jean's mouth, his accent curving around it and voice soft as music.
"Still," Jeremy says. "I'm really proud of you, Jean-Yves."
Jean ducks his head again, but Jeremy can't have that. He reaches for Jean's jaw again. Jean knows him well enough to evade and kiss him instead, the perfect distraction. Jeremy is happy to let him get away with it, because that was his end goal anyway.
They stay on the beach together for a long time. When their friends eventually find them, Jeremy watches the way that Jean lights up as Cat tackles him in a hug and he playfully banters with Kevin, two things that would've been impossible a year ago. Jeremy keeps hold of his hand, both of them on top of the world with no plans on coming down.
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thesummerstorms · 3 months ago
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If I ever did fully write a PJO/DC crossover fic, it would probably be DickKory (because I was raised on 2003 Teen Titans and found DC again as an adult through the animated films), and I'm not actually sure how well that would go over with the segment of the fandom that likes Annabeth Wayne or demigods meet the BatFam/JL fics.
I think most of what I've seen has Dick as being single or with Babs.
But I'm always gonna be loyal to Kory at heart 🤷‍♀️
And if we're in a multiverse where Annabeth is Bruce Wayne's kids anyway and Dick spent the months after finding out Jason was dead looking for her, maybe that shift in attention/ that flap of the butterfly's wings avoids all of the Mirage stuff for that verse.
Like, the rushed wedding never happens either, and I do think they might still break up for a while so they could figure themselves out, but for ME I will believe in my heart that by the end of HOO, Dick & Kory are back together. 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️
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yesyourstalker · 5 months ago
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Ikkan: warabie wake up!
Warabie:mmmmmm.. what? I thought it was our day off?
Ikkan: it is. Get up and get dressed
Noji: we have to go to church!
Warabie: church!?!
Ikkan: yeah. Our dad wants us to go at least once while we're here
Warabie: ugh ..really? You guys don't seem like you're the... Religious type
Noiji: we're not religious. It's just something we do
Ikkan: we only go just to catch up with other people in the town you know and just talk to each othr while listening to service
Noiji: I like going to church, learning a lesson of the day, singing solms, talking to our neighbors and then we have a nice dinner with everyone.
Ikkan: it's only an hour sermon.
Merv: boys hurry up! Hope you have your Sunday. Best on. Cirrina sweetheart, oh look at you! The dress fits perfectly
Cirrina: I didn't think I'd look cute in this, but I like it. Though it does look a little dated
Ikkan: you kept my old clothes?
Merv: we weren't just going to throw it away. We keep all of your clothes yours too Noiji. We have all your things in boxes
Noiji: why?
Merv: just in case we had another baby. we didn't want to buy all new stuff....... I didn't want to buy new stuff... Shimi do you have the dish?
Shimi: yeah... warabie get dressed we need to leave in 15 minutes
Warabie:.*sigh* .. . Mr Kane do you have any dress clothes that I can fit in?
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Pastor: so Pikaia looked to Cod still wet from the salt water he emerged from. He looked upon them and asked what his purpose was and why he was here. Cod looked down with nothing but love and said to Young pikaia 'I give my children of the Sea no purpose, no goal and no reason' meaning?
Church: "we are free we"
Pastor: yes we are free to roam and grow and make our own choices. But with those choices comes with?
Church: "effects and consequences"
Pastor: yes. So let's turn to Gideons 12:44
Warabie: what page is that?
Ikkan: here...[flips]
Pastor: I bring up choices today because that is what we will be discussing today the act of choice and the reasons behind those choices. This lecture will start with a squid named malamar..............
Cirrina: *sigh*
Octoling: I know it seems boring now. But give it a couple more minutes and it'll start to get interesting. father Berg is a really good storyteller
Cirrina: ugh I hope so..
Octoling: You're not from around here are you? hehehe.....
Cirrina: no.... I'm here to visiting... I'm just working on my grandpa's farm
Octoling: Kane is your grandfather? That's pretty neat he delivers milk to our shop week
Octoling mother: bayou! No talking during the sermon!
Bayou: sorry ma.... Talk more during dinner. My name is bayou by the way
Cirrina: name's Cirrina
Bayou: Nice to meet you Cirrina
[Hour later]
Pastor: malamar looked upon Cod with tears of sorrow. 'why! Why? Why have you abandoned me so? why have you forsaken me for so long? for I have done all that you've wanted me to do. I was kind, I was generous, I've given to the poor and I fed the hungry and yet you still turned your back on me for why?
Cod stared down at their lost child and they said 'for you've only done those not out of kindness, not out of generosity but for a reward. If it wasn't for my desire to help those who were not able to help themselves you would have walked past them if I didn't vocalize my dismay seeing my children in pain you would have done nothing.' malamar looked on cod dried and frail with nothing else to say forced to work another 100 years...... alright so that's the end of our sermon. Let's all catch up with each other.... I see some new faces and some old ones. Let's all talk to our neighbors.
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Old lady: look at you so handsome just like your father.
Old man: just lik em ye gott yea long nek an evythig. Why havnt yav fixed ya beak yet? Looken odd whit it ben off centered. Ya need ta gu to the dentist. Cant be looken lik that at yur age
Noiji: aww come on... I like my beak
Old lady: ohhhh is your twin still in school? I heard they dropped out poor things
Noiji: he just graduated actually...... ikkan come on and say hi to the Flanigans
Ikkan: hi Mrs Flanagan
Old lady: well look at you! Ya so tall....nice broad shoulders too
Old man: too tall fa music tel yu that! Yu coud be a hell of athlete ya coud. 3 pointers and such If it wasnt for yur klutzy and awkward demeanor
Ikkan:...............
Old lady: oh he's so quiet like usual
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Pastor's wife: so how's living in haddaido? I'm sure you're sick of the city.
Merv:ehhh it has its charm. I like the food and environment. Noiji really likes it there. it's more...it's more technologically advanced. I can barely use my shell phone he's making music with one.
Pastor's wife: how's your wife? I haven't seen her in a while? Has she retired yet?
Merv: nope she's currently on vacation right now. Having her own......girls trip
Pastor's wife: hmm
Merv: hmm
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Pastor: how did you enjoy the sermon?
Shimi: I actually quite enjoyed it actually it was very eye opening. I haven't been in church since I was a boy
Pastor: well we're open to more volunteers if you're welcome to join us every Sunday
Shimi: well I might invest in that
Warabie: since when you were a religious type dad?
Shimi: hush up and help setup the table ....... I would like some advice tho father.
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Bayou: so you actually use real weapons?
Cirrina: yeah
Bayou: and you don't.... die?
Cirrina: no the weapons aren't powerful enough to kill you. It's just to...... splat you
Bayou: Does it hurt?
Cirrina: it really depends on the weapon. Some hurt more than others, guns like splattershot or a dual weapon they can leave small marks sometimes. Charges, surprisingly aren't that bad. Depending on how far away they are it can feel like a pinch when you're hit. The worst ones are brushes and rollers, I got a headache after someone splatted me with a carbon roller
Bayou: and you do that for fun?
Cirrina: yeah it's more of a sport where I live I'm actually the captain of my turf war team so hehe
Bayou: you must be really good I've never picked up a weapon before. We're actually not allowed to have them here. We don't believe in the glorification of warfare or the mimicry of violence
Cirrina:....oh..... that's cool..... I mean I wouldn't say it's violent It's mostly just painting...... Trying to get most coverage
Bayou: oh yeah Yeah yeah I understand heh I just meant as a culture and our history in krillarney we don't really want to be reminded of those events......... yeah........
Cirrina:.. yeah I get that uhheh. .. . ........
Bayou: I like your tentacles. I like the ink color. Is it natural?
Cirrina: yeah actually this is my natural ink
Bayou: It's very beautiful. It reminds me of a sunrise
Cirrina: (blush).........thank you. I like yours too is it. It's a nice, deep blueish purple. It's a really pretty color
Bayou: oh thank you...
Pastor: dinner is ready!
Bayou: come on they're serving roasted snapper.
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Friend 1: hello
Cirrina: hey girl
Friend 1: oh my cosh Cirrina! How's your trip abroad? What's the food like? How's the fashion? are the boys cute?
Cirrina: That's why I called you.....so there's this guy
Friend 1: I'm listening
Cirrina: He's super cute. His tentacles are like a dark bluish purple, he has a really nice smile....huuu...he smells like vanilla and honey! ahhhh! he's so charming I could die! He said my tentacles look like a sunrise
Friend: a romantic ohhhh and he likes you?
Friend 2: I thought you were dating Paul!
Cirrina: I'm not dating Paul!
Friend 2: well you said you liked Paul!
Cirrina: I can't like two guys?!
Friend 2: not when you know I like one of them!
Cirrina: how is that my problem?!
Friend 3: how tall is he
Cirrina: around 4'11
Friend 3: ohhhh he's short hehehe you should send a picture of him later
Cirrina: what are you guys even doing anyway
Friend 1: we're at Cassidy's place.
Cirrina: ew why are you at her place..... she's such a catty bitch
Friend 3: We're planning on seeing ink-fast together. Are you still going?
Cirrina: I don't know I still need money for tickets
Friend 1: well you better hurry up ticket sales start at the end of the month and they're probably going to be sold out by the time you get back. We might just go without you
Cirrina: (scoff)
Friend 2: so just being clear you don't like Paul?
Cirrina:...... Nina.......... I have to go. I need to go feed some calves
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Ikkan: morning babe... yeah I'm about to head in for today. You found a best man?............oh she's a nice choice. Yeah I asked her why?.........well you should have asked first not my fault you procrastinate.....hehehe..... you'll be fine..... I'll see it on our wedding day. Yeah love you too..... yes.... I'm alone........... Neta......stop....*sigh*..hehe..... I'm wearing a black tank top and briefs. No I'm not the purple ones..... I'm wearing the Mr shrug ones........... what do you mean I ruined the vibe?!? Hehehehehe I'm hanging up... oh really what are you wearing?........take a pic, let me see........................ that's worse than what I'm wearing!........ because it has a hole in it!...
Warabie: HEY IKKAN!!
Ikkan: *gasp*. .. warabie knock! Cod!
Warabie: I.... I..... just wanted to ask.....if you're.... you're still planning on marrying Neta..... .. If.....if.... you're not willing I'd gladly take him..... I'd-I'd-I'd gladly take him if you don't want him
Ikkan: are you drunk?
Warabie: also what am I wearing as a groomsmen? Do we have to match? Can I pick out your suit? No offense but you have terrible taste
Ikkan: warabie go to sleep......how much did he drink?
Noiji: just 2 and a half pints he's a real light weight...... I put your two in the fridge
Ikkan: hm...... yeah I'm still here it's just warabie being a jackass..........*sigh*....... You know what we can do. We can watch a movie like we used to do... Long distance movie night........ yeah I'm heading down stairs...... You got finnflex open?..... All right, I'm all set up too...... Let's put you on speaker......
Neta: All right, I got you on the speaker too. What do you want to watch? I was thinking of "the kraken 2 sunken ship"
Ikkan: they don't have that on finnflex krillarney.
Neta: fuck. what do they have?
Ikkan: mostly documentaries
Nets: do they have wahoo land documentary? A big dream with with even bigger lawsuits?
Ikkan:.......... yeah
Neta: let's watch that one I heard someone actually fell off one of the coasters
Ikkan: wait we actually perform there in the grand opening I think Murasaki is in this.
Warabie: can I watch with yooooooooou? *Boop*
Ikkan: No fuck off
Warabie: I don't like it when you're so mean to me!
Ikkan: and I don't like it when you hit on my boyfriend but we can't get what we want all the time can we? Go upstairs!......... sorry
Neta: It's fine. I have my own personal nuisance with me
Mahi: why are you up so early! It's 5am!
Neta: Don't you have like college to go to or some shit? Leave me alone. I'm on a date!.... Okay, let's watch the documentary
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Mahi go home already @fish-at-fish-fish-resort
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beautifel · 1 year ago
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seems like my heart does nothing but break lately
#oh my god dont read the tags. it breaks for everyone :( but on a more personal level#for my gf whos sinking deeper into something n i cant even help bc im a wreck myself but i am so so scared to lose her#still havent even been able to book a psych appointment n i rlly dont know where to go with all these ..em*tions#Guys i rlly dont understand one thing. how come one random freak whos in ur life at some point can derail a whole person like eons later#jeopardise their whole future just by crossing some lines for funz i really dont understand this#not fair not fair at all this is evil#and becasue u got unlucky someone wanted to be disgusting u have to carry the consequences#i rly still cant even say it i still cant even write it#i dont even know how . irl the only perosn i told in some capacity#is dealing with her own trauma and i hate that jsut being understanding is not enoughlike#Wow Lmao Its just Funny How it Shapes You. & U Can Never bury it forever becuz it will always catch up to you😂😂😂😂😂😂#AND THE PAST CAN NEVER BE ERASED 😃😃😁😁😂😂😂🔫🔫🔫🔫🔫🔪🔪#at least my gf has been taking steps to deal with it for.3 yrs and i just never even#LOL i feel like such a coward but the sh*me and the g**lt associated with the Thing..r so overwhelming i cant even admit it#what would i even do at the psych appointment like straight up what am i gonna say Lol#hai iam here to process something i dont actually remember probably becasue i was a child but imnot sure. n id rather#kms than tell u how i know 😂. So thats also why my heart breaks. for that little girl who was a ball of shame i guess and no matter#how much i cognitively.like rationally know its not my fault the ball of shame n guilt is still there#n it swallows me every time i vaguely start 2 think about acknowledging the Th*ng#or whatever. And thats just my end of the deal but my gf has it worse genuinely bc she remembers everything n still has to see the freak#n it went on for yrs n her family doesnt know n heres the worst thing hes a beloved family member a sweet boy with struggles of his own#well i hope he walks into traffic for doing what he did to her
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bunnihearted · 4 months ago
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𖦹 ׂ 𓈒 🐇 / ⋆ ۪
#i dont know there's just... smth within me that craves it. in a profound wat#way** -_-#like... i am just someone who is made to love and be loved. that is what i want in this world in this life#i dont have any dreams or aspirations. all i need and want is to love#and since i dont have that in my life i am so deeply unhappy#and like i dont give a fuck about the 'love yourself#be whole by yourself. live a full life on your own#dont be happy bc of other ppl' blah blah blah#i dont care. my world view is that we are all different. we are all made of various stuff and we all need different things#(in my opinion; as long as u dont hurt anyone.... depending on intent... like depending on who u hurt and why.. as long as u dont harm#random innocent ppl for no fkn reasonand without consent. it is all fine)#the truth about the world is that none of us got all the fkn answers and we have no fkn right to demand that everybody lives according to a#made up book of rules. that's like actual insanity to me.#maybe someone else's way of living is crazy TO YOU. but theyre doing what they can to get by and thats none of your business#maybe u dont get it. maybe u dont understand. but someone else's life isnt for u to understand. only to look away and move on#if u arent compatible. needing to beat everyone down into the little box u have created is like... unrealistic and unsustainable lol#and i think that what i need as a person is nothing but love. deep profound love. which is sad bc that isnt really...#easy having my personality disorder :// plus that is smth very very rare and only a lucky few can experience that#i think i could still be happy in a healthy relationship where mutual like exists. even if... i know now that feeling that love is possible#idc if someone else is like omg thats so unhealthy gurlll love ya self gurlll. thats not what i need#everyone lives differently and yeah for some ppl it is much much harder#to get by bc we arent 'normal' or 'sane' or whatever. but it isnt wrong or incorrect#i just think im so so unhappy bc this is the one thing i need#and now me and my heart are like a withering flower#all i can hope... is that one day it will bloom. maybe one day.#but yeah no matter the amounts of work i do on myself (which i am trying to do lmfao stfu) or therapy#as long as i lack the one thing my soul craves iwill be dim and dull and feel numb
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raisedandeaten · 4 months ago
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the misplaced desire to have a uniquely american experience as a european, or to feel nostalgic towards specifically american ideas as a european born and raised in europe
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rontra · 1 year ago
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”you don’t even know me” LMAO.
it is, at any rate, my solemn duty to support red lantern supergirl in this trying time. I don’t know what she’s doing or why she’s doing it but anyone with a cape that spontaneously transformed into being made of blood is probably on the right track. tell her good luck with whatever it is for me plz thanks
YEA THE PROBLEM IS. IT LOOKS SICK AS FUCK. SO WE DO HAVE TO SUPPORT HER. the red lantern corps vibes in general are very good for me
as for the. What and Why. the answer is "rampaging" and "MAD" 😊
the red lanterns wield red power rings. they run purely on rage and hate and it flushes all their blood out of them and the red ring becomes their new heart and if they lose the ring they flatline due to the "having no blood" problem. its all a little bit awkward but in the meantime at least they can spit nasty gunk at people like a plasma cannon. god bless our angry soldiers
anyway red lanterns can sort of draw out rage in other people to control them, but if you're mad enough a red ring might go "oh fuck yes a bowl of seeds for me" and choose you to wield it (and do all the aforementioned things to you ofc). thats what happens to ctde kara, which just made everything a thousand times worse than anyone ever wanted and now everyone is very stressed about the out-of-control raging kryptonian problem. so it is true that in her heart she doesn't really WANT to be doing what she's doing bc she really is a good person and doesn't like hurting people. she puts in a lot of effort on a daily basis to Not hurt people. but right now shes more or less in Berserker Frenzy Mode and not in control of anything that's happening 😔 she needs a calm-down hug for sure (if she doesn't melt pg with napalm blood first)
we un-repressed her rage ❤ good luck girl ❤ (attacking indiscriminately)
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starrysymphonies · 1 year ago
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IM NEVER GONNA STOP THINKING ABOUT ZICAH AUAGHHGHJHGH IM ON MY REREAD OF BOOK TWO AND LIKE, ITS VERY OBVIOUS THEYRE WARMING UP TO EACHOTHER
Their entire conversation from pages 156-157 BUT THISBIS MY FAVORITE EXERPT FROM IT
“Zed was out of his depth. He was cold, and lonely, and very afraid.
‘Please’ he rasped. ‘Please just leave me alone.’
Micah’s smirk faltered. He opened his mouth, then closed it and cleared his throat. ‘Listen, you’re going to be all right. I’ve seen that moldy fireball of yours take out worse than a few mummified elves. And that was without Frond babysitting you.’”
Foster WAS right, Micah DOES stop Zed from getting too angsty
And later on page 263 Zed defends him
“‘I’ll say,’ said Jett. ‘When the gods were handing out brains and Micah went for his share, they told him, ‘Sorry that girl who was just here took the last of them.’
They all chuckled at that, except for Zed, who said ‘Aw, he means well.’”
LIKE AUGHHGH
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It’s so obvious to me that book 1 was like, Micah subconsciously crushing on Zed and consciously he was like “ok I’m gonna ignore that and push him and those feelings away because thinking about him all the time is ODD” and then in book 2 he’s trying to look out for him in his own Micah-way and actually warming up to him
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siena-sevenwits · 1 year ago
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Disclaimer: These thoughts are more emotionally than logically expressed, and reflect my own experience and preference.
#I have some beef with Lockwood and I say this as someone who really enjoys both the show and the books.#I've been doing a rewatch to introduce it to my dad (who loves it!) but we just hit Episode 5 and - is it just me but does this episode#plunge rather deeper into the darkness than we see in the previous episodes? It makes sense narratively of course#Complete Fiction has the task of structuring it such that there's a proper midpoint shift in the series and in my own works I increase#the stakes around this point and really let the protagonists struggle. So it's not so much that I have an issue with things getting#more focused dangerous and difficult. I don't know that I have a logical reason for the unease I feel with Episode 5 - there's just somethi#vaguely disturbing to me about it. It may be my own personal sensitivities. The interrogation scene at Winkman's has absolutely nothing#graphic about it and I appreciate the discretion - but it's just so intense - the threats to draw on Lockwood's face with the heated#instrument - the whole electric shocks sequence - I have been told I have a particularly vivid and empathetic imagination so I may just#be filling in too many gaps and feeling the scene more intensely than some would but it genuinely bothered me. More so on rewatch#though I didn't like it the first time either. I wonder too if it's because on rewatch I can compare it to the scene in the book#Gosh - the book scene is *comedic!* 'Let's disguise ourselves as ditzy tourists and while you check the backroom I'll let my coins#fall all over the place and crawl around under the tables loaded with antiques and freak the owners out! And when they get caught#Winkman just lifts them off the ground menacingly and chucks them in the street. The fact that we had to turn this into a midnight#torture scene for TV - I don't know - I don't like it. And just the atmosphere isn't as balanced as in the other episodes. So many flashbac#to grotesque corpse faces which are somehow a lot more disturbing than the CGI ghosts which feel much more Halloweenish#Not much love and light carved out in the darkness. There's some for sure! And even in the torture scene that bugs me I appreciate how it#shows Lockwood's heart and allows us to explore some meaningful territory that the ditzy tourist scene doesn't#I'm just griping and mainly hoping that the rest of the series is more how I remember it from first watch. The warmth of the Portland#Row gang means a lot to me. Stacking this dark feel on top of the discomfort I have with the harsh language rubs me the wrong way#(Thankfully I have online filters so the language isn't an issue for me but it does make me more reluctant to recommend to friends.
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hopecomesbacktolife · 1 year ago
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SAPPHIC SHUXIAO MY BELOVED 💕💗💕💗💕
“ ...‘Nothing?’ I repeated with a smile instead. ‘What does your new friend, the formidable General Mengqi, think of this plan?’
It had been nothing more than a teasing guess. Together, they had orchestrated the rescue of the Celestial Emperor and the prisoners from the Jade Palace. Somehow, the animosity that had sparked between them had morphed into a grudging respect. Shuxiao spoke of the general several times after, in friendship I had thought, if not for this deep flush spreading across the back of her neck. I had never seen her so affected before, and I was both thrilled and afraid for her. Shaking my head, I cast my trepidation aside. Love did not wound all who reached for it.
An answering smile lit Shuxiao’s face. ‘She will join me, now that… things have changed in the Cloud Wall.’ ”
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