#these are the exact quotes btw

[thekingofthenameless]

Just a reminder that if you don’t have anything nice to say THEN DON’T SAY ANYTHING AT ALL!

“And you don't see how you're incapable of writing happy things?” (after I told them what I thought TKN is in one emoji)

“Me personally I wouldn't want the emojis people would describe my story with to be literally all of the sad looking ones”

[crippling-pages]

“Oh hi Mom and Dad! Of course I’d love to visit! What kind of son would I be if I didn’t visit my parents?”

-Cole, who’s mom is dead and hasn’t visited his dad for years, ran away from home, and in his only form of communication with him, has been lying about where he’s been and what he’s been doing.

[leave-your-body]

do u ever think about percy telling annabeth she's good and better than him and better for the quest. "you just are"

and how annabeth told hephaestus that the gods were all selfish and maybe she was before but she wont be anymore. "i just won't"

[wish-i-were-heather]

Trump: "She doesn’t have a plan. She copied Biden’s plan, and it’s like four sentences. Like, run spot run. Four sentences that’re just ‘oh, we’ll try and lower taxes.’ She doesn’t have a plan, take a look at her plan. She doesn’t have a plan." Also Trump: "I have the concepts of a plan."

[cookiecaker]

i take off my blindfold and it hurts

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

JANE: What was up with the "splunk" thing?

DIRK: I like splunk. It's a t-shirt phrase.

ROXY: "pa-ya-ya" and "splunk"

DIRK: Right, both things you say when you splunk.

ROXY: can u imagine liek post coital someone saying pa-ya-ya!

JANE: I imagine that is what Jake does.

JAKE: I have a gun and i shoot it and a little flag that says "pa-ya-ya!" comes out!

ROXY: LNAO thats aswrsome

JANE: You keep it by your bedside?

JAKE: Yeah and when i do the horizontal tango i just pick up the gun like--

ROXY: like oh em gee this sex is so good i need to kill myself

JANE: "I'm never going to have sex like this again so I should just kill myself right now."

DIRK: Pa-ya-ya!

[hood-ex]

Pfft just remembered that after Babs insinuated she could be the reason for Jason to stick around in Gotham, Jason denied it, and when Babs asked why, Jason said, "Because, Barb, it's like you said... I'll never be Dick Grayson."

[starrysharks]

persnaps you could draw Wiles from Across the spiderverse 👀

evil miles with braids

[totally-correct-star-wars]

Satine: Padme, remember when you said you weren’t going to interfere with my love life? Padme: No, that doesn’t sound like me at all.

[sheebadukiiiii]

okay LAST ONE bc ive been eternally changed by this.

[doolallymagpie]

no idea why I randomly remembered this from my "probably not gonna write it ever" list and was driven to find it in my ancient notes, but I might as well share it

"NG without the plot" AU subplot: Bobbie accidentally nearly causes a huge scandal for both Chrisjen and Nancy Gao because...well, in her defense, who'd sleep with both the former and current UN Secretaries-General? and also how was she supposed to know that she was that Nancy Gao? she's just supposed to keep track of every sexy brunette with soulful brown eyes, a cute butt, and gorgeous hair in Earth politics (lord knows she has trouble managing just the one)?

[quicktimeeventfull]

something something something the yotsuba arc as a play-within-the-play about death note as a whole because at heart death note is about a boy who dooms himself to die, on purpose, then fails to remember that he has to actually walk the path and die the death. he forgets he’s going to be there the whole time. or he just doesn’t care, because he sees himself as a chess piece and not as a person. sending the lamb of himself off the slaughter, refusing to realize he won’t be able to consume the meat. selflessness as cruelty rather than a virtue.

[mashallah]

I think one good thing about biden dropping out is not having to hear the same “settle for biden because no third-party candidate has a winning chance and I don't want that orange fucker to be president again” pep talk anymore. One bad thing about biden dropping out is that we have to expect liberals to use their brains and collaboratively vote like they did and wanted to do with him this election

[fiendishartist2]

sorry that i think leitners brutal pipe murder is funny. cant help it

[loganhowlctt]

hihi

miguelo-hara → loganhowlctt

[12pt-times-new-roman]

c3e63

Within the chamber, there are remnants of rituals and spells that have been "abandoned."

"You are intruders within my domain." The air instantly gets colder. "Hevestro is not available... I am Evothorir, and you are in my home uninvited." The air grows colder and the lights dim slightly as shadows cascade from the ceiling. "Hevestro is mine. Omadua is mine. This valley belongs to me." A pale gray, pointed face emerges from the cascading shadow, the eyes a faint blue with a smile of crooked, cracked, elongated teeth. With an arcana check, Prism identifies that there is a fey energy to this thing.

Prism says they have nothing invested in Hevestro, that they can get the power they want then leave.

"You smell of... potential." Orym sees some little whips of red light in the shadow.

"Whatever happened, it freed me. I have no interest, for now, in leaving. I am home, and you are intruding... I know how you can help me. You can join Hevestro. You have potential — I want it."

Initiative!

This thing has legendary actions and resistances, and is able to cast at least 6th level spells. As a bonus action, it manifests one of the two glowing red orbs Orym saw, which turns everything in a radius grayscale.

As Orym strikes it, he sees that there's some kind of corporeal form inside the shadow, and assumes that it's Hevestro. When Prism hits it with force damage, the shadow dissipates for a moment and she sees a shriveled elven figure within that also takes the damage.

Ashton rage build update: When Ashton's gravity rage build is active and a creature within the gravity well tries to move away, that creature loses 10 feet of movement and has disadvantage on attack rolls against creatures that aren't Ashton.

With Seedling, Orym dissipates the shadow and uses the grappling vine, which wraps around the shoulder of the humanoid within. With a successful strength check, the body is pulled onto the ground next to Orym, and the shadow shrieks. Then Prism sends Dynios to cast dimension door on the body and teleports it next to Ashton. Now that's what I call teamwork!

Bor'dor does have sorcery points, and uses them to regain a spell slot.

Deni$e gives the elf a healing potion, and he wakes up. He's a middle-aged elf with matted black hair, tanned skin covered in tattoos, and lavender eyes. He's wearing metal bracelets, leather vestments over green robes.

With a quickened eldritch blast, Laudna gets the HDYWTDT! The shadow reduces into a tiny slug-like thing that pulls itself forward before Laudna squishes it. The red orbs fall to the ground and shatter.

(Have I mentioned? Socerer/warlock is one of my favorite multiclass combos because of the quickened spell eldritch blast.)

Bor'dor uses mass cure wounds and heals everyone up, including the elf. The spell looks like little puffs of blue cotton candy. (How/why does he have this spell?)

Hevestro sits up and says that he's responsible for protecting "her," gesturing to the obelisk. "Any solstice is a strange time, and in preparation, we were hoping to reinforce the protective wards here. I don't know how, but Evithirir, the Taker, seems to have escaped and come back." An ancient Gau Drashari named Omadua rooted here long ago, but Evithirir was drawn to the immense power of Omadua and they fought, which diminished him; he was sealed for centuries, broke free during the solstice, and slaughtered the rest of the people in the shrine. However, the battle left Omadua mortally wounded, and she spent her final years implanting her power and spirit as a fane of protection for the region, which has since become the Emerald Tree.

Even Evithirir didn't know why or how they were freed.

Hevestro doesn't know who Ludinus is, and doesn't know what happened to the bodies of his fellows.

"Gau Drashari... not Hishari. Definitely not Hishari." "What do you know of the Hishari?" "Not a terrible amount, just what the locals are aware of... there was a humble village of farmers and crafters called Tumilo — nice folk. But 50 years ago, a charismatic figure arose named Efterin. He was traveling from town to town displaying abilities and giving sermons about the need to reinstall the primordial powers within our world — a task that is foolish, as the gods scattered them long ago. Even so, he drew many to follow him, eventually settling in Tumilo and taking control of the town. Last I heard, the source of Efterin's power was likely his downfall, leading to the destruction of the village. The survivors scattered." The town was far west of where they are now, not terribly far from the base of the Udeespire Mountains.

Ahhh. Abadena was a survivor of the Hishari village, and has "seen the error of their ways," allegedly. Hevestro hopes that she isn't being "re-radicalized" by Ludinus, but she clearly has been, with her talk about a new rise of the Primordials. It explains so much that her beliefs were sourced from the Hishari cult and from her failure to learn from its destruction.

The Hishari were attempting to channel an extremely powerful source of elemental magic, an artifact or something that became a centerpiece to their cult. In not knowing what it was they toyed with, they couldn't control it, and it left a curse upon the land. Hevestro doesn't know for sure, but imagines that the power they were trying to access was sourced from the Primordial Titans themselves. But if this took place 50 years ago, then Ashton definitely experienced some kind of temporal displacement — so my money is on this artifact being a Luxon beacon.

"In the conflict between the gods and the primordials, it was proven that perhaps, such power should not be focused in only a handful of individuals. With their destruction and eventual dispersal in the presence of the gods, the lands were left to largely live for themselves, outside of the influence of the temples and the local governments. That's where eidolons thrive — that's where we thrive, and that's why this valley is sacred, why we keep such strong mind to keeping it as it always has been."

Hevestro is happy to teleport the Bells Hells (and the group seems ready to split up at the drop of a hat), but he needs to recover his spells first.

Prism asks what he knows of the githzerai — he's heard of them, but doesn't know much, only that they are from the Astral Sea (which he describes as an ocean connecting the disparate shores of the planes).

Off in a corner, Deni$e grabs Bor'dor, twists his arm behind his back, and says, "I feel like you're not telling us everything."

Yessssss Laudna brings up the mass healing word. That isn't on the divine soul sorcerer list, and it's too high level to get from a feat. It seems like that question gets Bor'dor to tell the truth.

He grew up in "Menagerie, not far from Demali." His mother, Demandra, was blessed by the Wildmother, and taught him her ways in secret. They moved to the city, and under the guise of being leatherworkers, stayed away from the eyes of the people of the city and the church. Once, when he went into town to get some tools, some rich kids started a fight with him and he hurt them with a spell, nearly killing one. It was an accident, but his mother knew they wouldn't let Bor'dor live, so she took responsibility. She believed in the gods, and accepted her fate because of that; but Bor'dor's brother and father fought against an entire army for her freedom. Demandra's faith, on seeing them fall, shattered, believing that the gods had let her down. So she handed Bor'dor her dagger and told him to run, as the last thing he saw was Demandra engulfing both herself and the guards in a vitriolic sphere. This was years ago. He fled to the Cyrios Mountains, used his magic to make money, stole and tricked, developed a reputation. Soon, he caught attention, and was asked to join a community, and was asked a question. "Do you believe in the gods, and what they do is good?" He said no.

"What community?"

He drops his guise. Eyes full of sadness. A pain that only Orym recognizes -- indescribable grief. He's 6'4, the gold of his skin is cracked and gray.

Bor'dor fires a vitriolic sphere at a little crystal he had left on the ground.

"I saw you, you killed my friends in Marquet, you were there!"

HE'S PART OF THE RUBY VANGUARD. y'all fucking called it.

"You cast inflict wounds on an angel!" "It felt good."

Two initiatives in one episode!

Ashton rage build update: While the gravity build is active, when Ashton hits with an attack, he can use "gravity well" to force the target to make a STR save. On a fail, the target falls prone.

"Just get it over with, just end it -- end it, Laudna." Bor'dor is a bloody mess, crying, and Laudna is in a "bad spot." She goes into her form of dread, branches erupt, her eyes go dark -- and a faint purplish hue emanates from her pupils, a hue that hasn't been seen in a long time. Shaking. "I'm really sorry, Bor'dor. I just can't stand having anyone else betray me." She takes him by the throat and uses hunger of the shadow.

It's an ability (Marisha has never said "cast" in regards to this, she's always said "use") with an attack roll that seems to deal necrotic damage proportional to Laudna's level (in d6s or d8s, I think).

Bor'dor feels his blood turn to ice as he fades to unconsciousness, and Laudna feels good. She almost revels in the delicious revenge, and just hears a heartbeat in the back of her head as she dissociates.

Prism takes more damage from the acid, and she gets angry. She had been given so much hope and fun from the idea that they were learning together, and it was all a lie. She clocks him across the jaw, intending to deal damage in the stupor, and Bor'dor takes 2 death saves from the fist of a wizard with -2 STR.

As Bor'dor's life essence feeds into Laudna's mouth, a mourning veil begins to form over her face. Orym stands, watching, saying and doing nothing. Ashton takes Prism by the shoulders and turns her away. Deni$e doesn't often feel bad, but she does, and unbinds him.

"Laudna. At the threshold of death, Bor'dor is in your grasp, broken and at your mercy. What do you do?" 15 feet away, she sees Orym in her periphery, and he gives a tiny nod. Laudna is barely present, the only thing that's going through her head is Bor'dor's words about the look of someone who knows true pain. It's as if her life is flashing before her eyes, but it's trauma -- "losing Imogen, the solstice, losing her friends, watching so many die, being hung on the tree, death upon death upon death, so helpless, so out of control. In this moment, she has control, and nothing is going to stand in her way." She uses wither and bloom to take whatever lifeforce remains in Bor'dor, and it's not Laudna standing there anymore -- it's everything she hoped she wouldn't be, hoped wouldn't resurface, but the world has broken her. She gives in to the darkness. She can't control it anymore. "A familiar purple flame runs down her arm, not seen since the journey to retrieve her soul. From the ground, the roots and fried brush that has been gathered begins to sprout vibrant green and flowers of white petals, blue roses, a beautiful circle of life surrounds the two of them as Bor'dor's skin pales and cracks. His body thins. In that moment, the apex of natural beauty rising with life, alongside the balance of death, you watch the troubled life of Bor'dor Dog'son reduce to ash and memory."

Ashton walks over, and Laudna instincually lashes out. "It's okay." "Ashton?" "It's okay. It's gonna be okay. Come on, let's go sit down." They gently lead her away.

Orym lingers by the body, reaches into his belt, and pulls out the locket he took from the dead guard by the Malleus Key. He took it as a reminder because he felt bad for them, and leaves it now with Bor'dor. "We're at war." He goes, sits in the dark, and stares at the remains of a Gau Drashari.

"Ashton -- what have I done?" "Nothing that I haven't. Nothing that... I think we're all gonna have some nightmares before this is over." "I'm weak." "No, you're just hurt. It's okay." Laudna just cries into Ashton's shoulder, and he holds her close with no hesitation.

On the body, Deni$e finds a crossbow, an envenomed dagger ("I didn't get to use it, I would have, I would've stabbed each and every one of you"), leatherworkers' tools, a ring and cloak of protection, an immovable rod, and a hat of disguise. Deni$e takes the dagger with every intent of burying it with him. There is nothing tied to the Ruby Vanguard, and everything that would've tied him to the cult was likely discarded intentionally -- implying that he knew who the Bells Hells were from the get-go.

Bor'dor's body turned to ash in the wither and bloom spell. Deni$e scoops up the ashes, digs a hole, puts them in, fills it up with dirt, and puts a rock on top.

This is the first betrayal of Prism's life. She feels bad for punching him, but she's also seeing Laudna and what she did. To Prism, when Laudna did that, it wasn't something to be ashamed of. She's angry at being hoodwinked, she wonders if the feeling of learning and growth alongside Bor'dor was fake, she feels the literal and figurative acid that Bor'dor through. She's standing in the corner with a broken fist, afraid to start a conversation, but Deni$e comes over and puts a hand on her shoulder.

Deni$e has all of Bor'dor's stuff and offers the first pick to Prism. She opts for last pick instead, and she goes to shout at his grave. "We were supposed to be friends! This was supposed to work out differently!"

Eventually, Hevestro returns, after his own walk of grief. He immediately notices the change. "It seems that these days bring quite a bit of loss in so short a time. I am sorry for what has brought you here, and what has happened since. But do not let this weigh you down -- not entirely. Carry these memories with you; they hurt, but they are a strength as well. At least, I have to believe that. You are capable, or you wouldn't have been able to save me from a fate that even my focus prevented me from seeing approach. And I have a sense... just in the trust the eidolons of this land have already placed in you, that you walk a fateful path. But you do not know me from your families, and I do not wish to pry. Let us all take a night of rest. In the morning, I will usher you to your destinations, out of gratitude for the kindness you've done me."

I don't know about you, but my favorite kind of DM monologue is when the DM is so clearly communicating their own feelings toward the party through an NPC.

Laudna is afraid -- terrified that killing Bor'dor has hurt more than just him. She fears that, as hard as the Bells Hells have tried to cut her off from Delilah, she has opened that door again. But Prism comforts her. "If you closed that door once, you can close it again... I just don't want you to feel bad because it made sense, what you were doing. At least emotionally, I understand it." "I feel like control is a fallacy. We've talked so much about it here lately. We've tried to control our concurrent destinies... I'm just confused." "Well, confusion is just knowing you don't have control... so maybe surrendering to the confusion will be some medicine for that." "You're very smart, Prism -- very capable." "Thank you. You're an incredible magic user, and I think that someday you'll be strong enough to beat this bitch (Delilah) back to where she came from."

"Anger and pity don't have to be mutually exclusive." Y'know, I am absolutely living for the way the entire cast has become so good at these one-liners.

Orym can hear most of these conversations echoing, and he's meditating on how complex and broken the centuries of history are between his being held here and all of them being there, and how complicated this conflict is, how so many people have different reasons for their choices. In the end, all he can think about is what was taken from him: the people that he holds most dear, in the name of philosophy or ideology or whatever you wanna call it. "In the last few days, I've lost my footing, and I'm struggling with it. Sitting here on the stone, I know that we're going to try to kill the people who took from me, who didn't care who died to get what they wanted. And I'll just fucking die trying if I have to."

A little ways off, there's a sketch of Bor'dor's family. Deni$e finds it, then she digs another hole next to the first one. In it, she puts the dagger and the photo, before burying it and putting another rock on top.

In the morning, Hevestro offers to take them where they need to go. Before they leave, Ashton asks to take a bit of the crystal, and Hevestro gives them -- and Prism -- permission. When they're alone, Prism tells Ashton and Dynios how she doesn't want to go back, and suggests that she and Dynios could just disappear without anyone ever knowing. "Sometimes, books don't get returned to the repository what a shame." Dynios approves, and Prism acknowledges that she's asking the wrong person -- Ashton -- on purpose. But Ashton notes that "the thing you felt last night, you will feel again, and it will not feel better. Most adventures will end that way, not the other way. You're pretty fucking good at this, and I think, maybe, if you try not as hard to be someone else... just be a criminal nerd. You are clearly good at being a criminal, and you're a nerd. You're asking me? I'd do it. I've done worse. And, yeah, I think you'd be pretty good at it." Dynios pipes up and asks where she wants to go, and Prism would go anywhere there are scripts that need decoding, knowledge that's being hoarded. "Actually, we just got back from Whitestone -- they have a massive library, and the lord of Whitestone is a dick, so if a couple books go missing..." talisien jaffe you fucking genius--

Also, there's certainly something to be said about the character development of Dynios specifically.

"You said don't run from yourself -- but right now, I think I'm running toward myself." Changing Exandria for the better, one hubristic wizard apprentice at a time.

Meanwhile, Deni$e is going to go back to Emon to find Dariax. Prism offers to scry on him. (I can't believe there was a whole-ass exchange about "messing up your slots" without a single fucking giggle--)

Orym takes out his sending stone to Dorian. "Dorian -- still alive, by the skin of our teeth. Want to talk more. You know where Dariax is?" Another d100, another failed sending.

Deni$e and Prism give their goodbyes, and both are thankful for the rest of them not lying to or betraying them.

They distribute Bor'dor's items. (Ashton wholeheartedly agrees with Deni$e leaving the dagger in the grave, which is, IIRC, a huge change from the start of C3.) Laudna takes his slingshot; Ashton takes the immovable rod; Orym takes the cloak of protection; and Prism takes the hat of disguise (which looks more like a bandana).

Hevestro goes up to a tree and teleports the group away. Deni$e goes to Westruun to find Dariax; then, Prism and the Bells Hells (after having Prism scry on the other half of Bells Hells' current location, narrowly missing the werewolf threesome) return to Jrusar. (Ashton remarks, "come on, family. Let's get the rest of the kids.")

In his final words, echoing across Issylra, Bor'dor "is at peace. I'm with my family again." He's put to his rest, here, in the mountain, away from the gods. Under the watch of the guardian spirits who first crafted this world."