#these are just some quick examples of that! ^^

[darknight3904]

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘖𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘓𝘪𝘧𝘦

𝘓𝘰𝘨𝘢𝘯 𝘏𝘰𝘸𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵 𝘹 𝘍𝘦𝘮!𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳

𝘚𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘺: 𝘈 𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘴𝘦𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘭𝘬 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘢𝘵 𝘊𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘺 𝘐𝘴𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘓𝘰𝘨𝘢𝘯 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦.

𝘛𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘋𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘱𝘰𝘰𝘭 & 𝘞𝘰𝘭𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘦 (2024). 𝘙𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘪𝘱𝘶𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘱𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘭𝘺. 𝘐𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘉𝘰𝘺𝘴 𝘰𝘳 𝘎𝘦𝘯 𝘝, 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘝𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘢 𝘕𝘦𝘶𝘮𝘢𝘯 𝘰𝘳 𝘔𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘦.

𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘢 𝘥𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘰𝘧𝘧 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘗𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘥𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘵 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵.

𝘞𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴: 𝘝𝘪𝘰𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘶𝘢𝘨𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘦.

𝘐 𝘸𝘳𝘰𝘵𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘮𝘪𝘥/𝘶𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘳 30𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘶𝘵𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘭𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘨.

𝘞𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘊𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵: 3.1𝘬

𝘗𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘗𝘢𝘳𝘵 / 𝘚𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘔𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵 / 𝘔𝘺 𝘔𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵

The next two weeks following your rooftop conversation with Logan were odd ones. The apartment is calmer than normal as the two of you fall into a rhythm with each other. Usually, that rhythm was in silence, but it was still a rhythm.

Logan, like the freak of nature he was, always got up before anyone else and would start a pot of coffee. Eventually, you'd show up, still groggy and clad in pajamas for him to hand you a piping hot mug with just the right amount of sugar and milk. It had taken him two days to figure out exactly how you liked your coffee.

The two of you would usually then eat breakfast, and then depending on the day, you'd go off to work, or on your days off, you'd eat breakfast with him while the TV ran in the background.

During this time, you learned a few things about this new version of Logan the universe has gifted you. For example, if he was reading a book, every few pages, he'd lick the tip of his finger to turn a page. Another would be how he tapped his foot to the beat of a song if he liked it. You presumed Logan was also picking up on the little ticks that you performed as you lived your life. Of course, you didn't ask him if he was.

Sure, these weeks had been peaceful, but at the same time wildly aggravating. It was as though nearly all of your anger for the man that was currently loudly slurping cereal from his bowl, had disappeared in a puff of smoke. You had stolen so many glances at him over the past few days, hoping you might find some anger lingering in your soul for the bearded hunk of muscle yet, you always came up empty.

It was Wade who first pointed out to you that you were running low on hatred.

"You two are totally best buds, or should I say best bubs now?"

"We are not." You rolled your eyes as you handed him his lunch that he had forgotten at the apartment.

"Sure ya are. Let me know when the wedding bells chime, and I'll dust off my flower girl dress.

Wade was so full of shit it was practically leaking out of his ears.

Logan was a mystery to you. To outsiders (Wade) he was like a mean old barn cat. Quick to give a rebuttal and swat whatever kind words the annoying man had to say. Then, as if his brain was surgically removed and recalibrated, he'd turn into the biggest softie and start flirting with you.

You weren't dumb. You could see that he was into you from a million miles away. It made sense, considering the positive relationship he had with you in his universe. Well, before he fucked it up that is. What you didn't get is why he was so invested after all these months. You had been so cold and rude to him, hell, you had blown off his leg once in an argument. Yet, the past two weeks had been a whirlwind of boyish charm and little glances he probably thought you didn't notice. It was downright annoying how deep he was under your skin.

The worst part of it all was the fear that was eating you alive. Sure, the daylight chased it away and you rarely thought about it when you were actually with him. But late at night, when Laura was fast asleep, fear was all you felt. You were terrified of it, falling in love with him again. You couldn't do it again. And yet, here you sat, staring at that handsome face again like none of it had even happened in the first place.

"What're you doing today?" Logan asks

"I was thinking about starting Gilmore Girls. Or maybe Gossip Girl..." You say, "I need a new show to watch."

"Gossip Girl for sure." Wade says, standing at the microwave, watching his breakfast burrito heat up, "That Serena is the hottest person I've ever seen."

"Aren't you and Vanessa back together?" You ask

"Am I not allowed to appreciate other hot people in this world? Don't worry about it, I'll tell Blake about this later. Clearly, you don't find her attractive."

You scoff, only a moron would think Blake Lively wasn't attractive.

"Anyway, you two are not allowed to camp in the living room and binge-watch whatever show you had your eyes set on." Wade declares

"And why is that?" Logan asks, "Thought this was a free country?"

"Oh, it is. And that's why we are taking a trip to Coney Island today. Vanessa got free tickets from her work and we are all invited." Wade grins

You glance at Logan who already is looking at you, his eyes practically asking what your opinions were on this.

"Alright, fine. But you're not allowed to peer pressure me into any rides I don't want to go on." You point at Wade

"Deal." He grins, "Now go wake up Laura. I'd do it, but last time I woke her she stabbed both my eyeballs in and took that little foot knife of hers to my balls."

"Sounds like someone I know." You tease, gently kicking Logan's shin under the table

"I've never done that to you." He says looking at you confused.

"Um hello, what about me? Do I not have feelings? Did the night in the Honda Oddessy mean nothing to you?" Wade gasps dramatically

"No, It didn't."

"You insensitive bastard! I'm telling my therapist about you!"

Coney Island's boardwalk is crowded despite the cooler fall weather. You walk along in between Laura and Logan, observing the many different kinds of people that flock to the tourist trap. In front of you, Wade's toupee is shiner than normal as he walks hand in hand with Vanessa.

"Do you think he shampooed that thing before seeing her today?" Laura asked on your left

"Oh definitely." You reply

"Probably deep conditioned too. A hair mask or two." Logan chimed in from your right

"How do you know what a deep condition is? Or a hair mask?" You ask, bewildered

"When you've been alive for two hundred years, you pick up on things, bub." He says

"You've done a hair mask before, haven't you?" Laura eyed him suspiciously

"No," Logan said sheepishly

"You're so full of shit." She laughed

You lean over to whisper in her ear, "Bet he's gotten a blowout before too."

"You two know I can hear you, right?" Logan scowls

"You're too easy to pick on." You point out, patting his back

"Can you two stop eye fucking and hurry it up? I want to get in line for the Cyclone before it gets too long!" Wade groans

"Do you think we're being rude by leaving Al at home?" You ask as you stand next to Logan in line

"I'm pretty sure Wade left some cocaine out and put Jeopardy on for her. Besides, what would she even do here?" Logan says looking around at the games and rides.

"True. She's probably eating chips on the couch getting crumbs all over the cushions again." You sigh, thinking of all the times you've vacuumed the couch.

The line goes by surprisingly quick and before you know it, the loud clicking of the coaster's tracks fills your ears as you glance over the side of the cart at the people that looked like ants from so high up. Beside you, you're surprised to see Logan looking rather light-headed.

"Are you okay?" You ask, surprised at his obvious fear.

"Fine." He says, in a short tone you're not used to hearing.

You glance down at the lap bar, which he seems to be holding onto like it's going to unlatch at any second.

"You seem tense." You say

"I'm fine." He growls

"Peanut, don't tell me you're scared back there!" Wade calls over his shoulder from the cart in front of you, "This coaster is a piece of history! I bet Cap rode this when he was still skinny!"

"Shut up." Logan commands

The loud click, signifying you have reached the top of the drop has Logan silent. The loud screams of strangers reach your ears as the coaster drops. You can hear Wade and Vanessa, laughing and yelling in joy as the 85 foot drop commences.

"Holy shit!"

Logan's loud curse beside you has you looking over at him. He truly looked terrified. The ride continues and you try to keep yourself from laughing at Logan, whose knuckles are turning white as he grips the restraint.

A fast turn has you lifting slightly out of your seat, and the sound of screeching metal reaches your ears. On your right, Logan's claws have come out, his eyes still squeezed shut.

The ride begins to slow and you slowly reach out, placing your hand over Logan's

"It's over." You say to him

His eyes blink open and he looks over at you and then down to your hand that rests carefully ontop of his. As you roll back into the loading dock, his claws retract, out of sight before someone can point and stare.

"You survived." You joke as you unbuckle yourself

"Barely." He huffs as he steps out of the cart

"See? It wasn't that bad." Wade smiles, hooking Vanessa's arm in his. "Fun right?"

"That's not the word I'm thinking of," Logan says as he sticks close to you

"We should go again," Laura says as you exit the ride

You can't help but notice that Logan looks a bit green as you walk the boardwalk so when Wade suggests the next high-thrill coaster, you decide to stay on the ground with him.

"You don't have to sit with me," Logan says as the two of you get comfortable on a wooden bench

"Just between you and me, that ride Wade is waiting for is insane. I'd never step foot on it." You admit with a smile

"If he goes flying out of the restraints, I hope someone gets it on camera," Logan says

You nod in agreement, deciding it would indeed be a funny image.

Logan still seems rather distant so You glance around your surroundings wondering if there's any way to distract from his recent "near death" experience. Your eyes land on a soft pretzel cart.

"Wait here." You say, gently tapping his thigh with your hand

Two soft pretzels and a couple of overpriced sodas later. you're doing your best to cheer up The Wolverine, who apparently hates thrill rides.

"Want to walk around some more? They're gonna be waiting for at least another hour." He asks

"How'd you eat so quickly?" You ask, men it was like they inhaled their food. Who was he? Kirby?

"Not my fault you're slow." He shrugs

You polish off your food and suggest a walk along the beach, tired of hearing screaming children and the loud noise of rides.

The sun is beginning to set as you kick off your shoes and let the cold water of the Atlantic wash over your feet.

"Kind of cold," Logan comments as he watches the water lap over his feet

"Don't be a baby." You brush him off as the two of you walk along where the waves meet the sand.

Pale orange paints the sky beautifully as you walk in silence, listening to the waves crash and the seagulls squawk. Cool wind messes with your hair as you steal glances at Logan. At one point, you catch him doing the same and you feel your face heat up, turning your gaze to your sandy feet.

You can't say it, or rather won't, but he's pretty like this. Dark blue jeans, paired with a flannel and black leather jacket. You can even see a bit of his chest hair peaking out from the top button of the flannel being undone.

"This is the longest you've gone without insulting me." He points out

"You want me to insult you?" You ask

"No." He says, "Just pointing it out."

You roll your eyes but can't help finding it a bit endearing that he picked up on that.

"You like the beach?" He asks, surveying the picturesque scenery.

"I do." You sigh, "I think I like the forest more though. A rainy day in a house with the woods in my backyard? The way the snow lines the trees in the winter? Those are my favorite."

Logan nods and his hand brushes yours. You pretend not to notice it, the way his skin sends tingles up your spine as the two of you walk along.

"What about you? You like the beach?" You ask

"It's alright. I don't like all the flying rats that steal your food." He says, motioning to the orange sky.

"You mean seagulls?" You ask

"Isn't that what I just said?"

You snort an unladylike laugh and slap your hand over your mouth, fully mortified that just happened.

Logan gives you a mischievous look as you open your mouth to apologize.

"Ever play tag?" He grins

You're not sure if he's two hundred or two as he taps your arm and dashes off, declaring that you're "it". You follow him with a groan, forcing your legs to run after him.

"Logan!" You yell as he puts distance between the two of you, the orange from the last bits of today's sun illuminating him.

There was no way you were catching him like this so, you focus your mind on him. Your brain easily becomes in tune he way his heart quickly beat to pump blood to his legs and arms as he ran. Got him.

Logan lets out a groan of frustration as you approach him, frozen to the sand under your command.

"Looks like you're it now." You say, tapping his shoulder

"This is cheating." He says, "You can't use your powers for this."

"No one is stopping you from using yours." You say

"What would I do? Cut you in half?" He asks

He never gets his answer as you jog off, putting some distance between the two of you before letting him move again. You think you might have a bit of a chance to run further as you move along. Perhaps he isn't as fast as you thought he was,

Big arms startle you when they wrap around your waist, lifting you up. Ocean water splashes onto your pants as you shriek in fear while Logan laughs.

"Looks like you're it again, hon." He says into your ear, spinning you around

"Put me down." You laugh

"I think we should go further into the water, actually." Logan declares

You push at his arms which are like steel as he takes a few steps forward so the water is up to his shins.

"Logan these are new jeans!" You gasp, lying to see if he'll let you go That ocean water was freezing, no way was he going to dunk you in there.

"We have a washer."

His deep voice sends a shot of electricity down your spine as his beard tickles your neck from behind.

"Yeah! Drown her!"

Wade's loud voice carries across the beach as Logan's grip loosens. You push yourself away from him, breathless and dizzy with excitement. The cold water comes up and splashes onto your pants anyway and you grumble a bit, thinking of how cold they'll be on the trip home.

Your foul mood is chased away as Logan leans down to your ear and whispers, "We should drown him, get some peace and quiet back home."

"I'll hold him down." You joke

"Don't give me ideas." Logan grins

As the two of you walk up the beach, you don't miss the way Laura is whispering to Vanessa, no doubt about you and Logan.

The rest of the night is spent with laughter and some of the unhealthiest food you've had in a while. You drag Logan onto the Tilt-a-Whirl, and then the Scrambler, and somehow pull him onto the Teacups, spinning the cup until both of you are dizzy beyond compare. Despite his negative attitude about it all, you can tell he enjoyed the rides, he was just too proud to admit it in front of Wade.

As for Wade, in his words, he was ascending to God level, and someone needed to call Thor and Loki because Asgard needed him. The source of his new ego? He had somehow managed to win three prizes from one of those usually rigged games and now he, Vanessa, and Laura all had matching stuffed dinosaurs.

Unfortunately for Logan, tonight was not his night for the games and he had just lost another five bucks to some rigged ring toss.

"You should probably forget it, Peanut. I'm on a whole different level than you."

Wade's words were certainly under the gruff man's skin as he slapped another five onto the counter, clearly not interested in being outdone.

"Is this their version of comparing dick sizes?" Vanessa asked, tossing an arm around your shoulders as Laura snickered at her joke.

"I'm pretty sure they've already done that." You laugh

You watch as Wade dances around Logan, saying things to him to get him to screw up. If this was your living room, Wade would've been missing a few limbs by now.

One loud shut the fuck up from Logan and a few lucky tosses as well, the worker is unenthusiastically proclaiming his win. Before you know it, a stuffed dolphin is being handed to you by Logan who seems overly smug about his win.

You don't want to admit that he probably spent triple what the toy was worth, so instead you thank him earnestly and ask him for an idea for a name.

"I dunno...what about...Frank?" He says

"You just spent like 30 bucks and you want to name him Frank?" You laugh

"I'm not good at naming shit," Logan grumbles, staring at his feet

"I'm joking." You smile, nudging him with your elbow so he looks at you again," Frank is perfect."

"Frank Howlett." Wade sighs shoving himself in the middle of you and Logan and tossing his arms around both of you, "What a cute family you are! Call me when the baptism planning starts! I want to be the Godfather."

Logan shrugs Wade's arm off his shoulders and pushes him away from the both of you.

"You're an annoying prick."

"Keep degrading me, it's my favorite form of foreplay."

"Ignore him, let's go on the bumper cars." You advise, pointing at the ride that's a few yards away.

You swallow back that fear that often plagues your mind and heart and daringly link your arm around Logan's. He quickly looks down at you and smiles a bit as you pull him off in the direction of the ride.

"Don't take it personally, buddy." Vanessa says, rubbing a hand up and down Wade's back, "You're just not his type."

"First of all, I'm everyone's type," Wade said, turning to catch Laura off guard with a boop to the nose,

"Secondly, when are these two motherfuckers going to kiss? Seriously it's been like five chapters and they're still dancing around like it's the fucking homecoming dance in freshman year!"

"C'mon, let's go ride the bumper cars," Vanessa says, pulling him along, Laura close behind.

"I'm serious! This slow burn can't slow burn much longer, I'll light my toupee on fire and toss it at this writer's fucking cat if something doesn't happen soon!"

Chapter Six

I've never been to Coney Island. So no one is allowed to clock me if I got stuff wrong.

here are some pics of my cat. Don't worry I'm going to keep her safe from Wade and his flaming toupee:

Comment to be added to the taglist:

Tags:

@kellyxo1 @mystiquesvendetta @gingerplague

@veru-boom @qardasngan @fandomsunited @reidsworld

@arrozconpepitoria @iamm3 @gigabitemyass @wordacadabra

@e-ak @khaylin27  @eternallyfrustratedwriter @chaimshelii

@badbishsblog @britttzy267 @lilly4639 @delicateholland

@cherrypieyourface @scrumptiousroadpalaceturkey

@one-of-castiels @littlemissoblivious @littledebbieinabigworld

@kbear8863 @one-of-castiels @jeysbae @moonixlity @spktrlvr

@chronicallybubbly @fearlessxlaurin @m1cky-y-y @loserbaby66

@commanderawkward  @mega-kittyglitter-1 @oidloid @mariaxman

@mariaxman @c3liaaaaa @midcenturymanhattan-blog @flamingbisexual08 @batrensworld

@fallout-girl219

@mrs-ephemeral @halepack2011 @insanesosciopath @venusindelusion @wolverines-tits

[ariaste]

A Discussion on Book Endings

Hey, friends. Thanks for coming today. I'm sorry to break it to you, but this is an intervention. Please, don't get defensive -- everyone here loves you and cares about you. But listen... I'm gonna need book readers and reviewers to reflect on the idea that finishing a book and going "Oh, I loved it so much, but I wish it was just a few pages longer!" is not really a valid point of negative critique in the assessment of a text.

Let me explain.

When I read people's otherwise wildly positive reviews of books and they say that line, I don't interpret it in context as, "This story needed to be a few pages longer for the plot to work, structurally, and for the ending to achieve a solid resolution." Rather, they basically seem to be saying simply, "I loved it and I didn't want it to end." That's always a GREAT feeling, but then they're.... taking points off from their total rating because of that??? They seem to be penalizing the author because they weren't left with a feeling of "Ugh, thank god it's over"? It's like, "This would have been five stars if it had had just one more chapter but it made me sad that it ended, so four stars" -- Guys, do we understand that's an insane take? It's insane. A book has to end. If you shriek "NO!!!" that it's over because you were having such a great time, that's... that's a symptom of a 5-star book, babes. I'm not sure why there's such a fashion these days for penalizing authors for this particular thing in this particular way, but it's really baffling to me.

But setting aside the puzzling trend of "I'm knocking points off because it ended when it should have gone on until I personally was fully bored and exhausted of it, like the 11th season of a TV show that was only supposed to go until season 4" -- listen, I guarantee you that nine times out of ten, when you're out here longing for just one more chapter or saying "this could have used an epilogue" you... are wishing for something that would have actively ruined your enjoyment and the quality of the book.

Are you a writer yourself? Have you ever finished writing a book before? Have you done it more than once? Have you deeply studied the endings of books? They are HARD, let me tell you what. Endings are so much harder than beginnings, because you're looking for that beautiful final note, like the ending of a symphony, and you're trying to ride it for a few glorious seconds before the FLOURISH and dum-dummmmmm....! and the conductor collapses as the audience bursts into applause! Right? Yes? Except that chances are that one more chapter or epilogue would ruin the pacing and resolution of the ending and muddle up the summary of the theme and thesis statement, and all of this WOULD ACTUALLY fuck up your experience of the story as a whole. For example, please consider the last Harry Potter book as an example. We all hate JKR now for being a TERF but oh, children, how quickly we forget that back in the olden times, we used to hate her for that fucking epilogue that made everything that came before feel rancid and pointless and hollow and cheap. Y'all remember how sickening and infuriating that was? Do you remember the Hunger Games epilogue? Nine times out of ten, that's what you're inexplicably wishing for.

To see this point illustrated, let's do a quick exercise together. Go pick out a piece of classical music -- some of my best suggestions for this are Beethoven's Ode to Joy, or "Der Holle Rache" from Mozart's Magic Flute, or Tchaikovsky's 1812 Overture. Listen to it all the way through. If you're struggling with scrolling addiction and your attention span has been severely damaged, fine, listen to the last two minutes ("Der Holle Rache" is the shortest, just 3 minutes). Then, after the song is done, click back to some random spot earlier in the piece, listen to another 30 seconds, and then stop. Consider: Did adding that last 30 seconds materially improve the piece, or did it undermine the overall emotional journey? Did it help the ending to stick the landing even more than it already did, or does it just feel weirdly stuck-on as an afterthought, like the "for more fun videos, check out the rest of our channel and don't forget to subscribe!!!" card at the end of youtube videos?

When you are wishing for an epilogue, my doves, you are wishing for something you do not actually want -- or which you probably would not want if you had the option to see it in practice and compare it side by side with the original. You are wishing for something that would more than likely make the story worse. You are holding the author at fault for something being wrong with the text only because you hit immersion and were having a lot of fun and didn't want to come back up for air. Like, I'm just not sure that's something that the author should be blamed for? It sounds like they were doing their job really well???

Please, just. Separate your feelings of "bittersweet disappointment that this wonderful book is over" from "frustration that the author didn't stick the landing, ugh what a flop" because they are two separate things. Before you say "I'm taking points off because I wish there was more", please take two seconds to ask yourself critical thinking questions like, "Why did the author choose to end the book here rather than in two more chapters?" because (other than a few wild outliers that should not be counted) the answer is never, "They got bored and just didn't feel like finishing the story." Chances are, they chose that specific ending for a reason. They ended it there because that's the point that underlines the thesis statement of the book, or because the emotions of that scene are the ones they want you to remember and walk away with, or because that marks the place where the story arc is genuinely over. When the author says, "And they all lived happily ever after," that means that what happily-ever-after looks like is in your hands now.

Nine times out of ten, you don't want one more chapter. Please. I promise you that you don't want one more chapter. The book is done; what you want now is either fanfiction or someone to talk about it with. Or maybe to start the book over from the beginning! Believe me, you would not want one more chapter if you had it. (Or, if you did have it and it magically didn't suck, you would just keep wanting more chapters because that's what "really enjoying the book" means. In which case, go read fanfic, that's what it is for.) I promise you, I promise you, the book would probably be worse with one more chapter and you would not like it as much. Please stop wishing for the author to be less good at their job. Please. A book has to end; so does this post. And we all live happily ever after*. The End.

----- * The post-canon coffeeshop AU sequel will be detailed exhaustively on AO3

[infiniteglitterfall]

OMG, COULD EVERYONE PLEASE STOP IMMEDIATELY BELIEVING AND REPEATING DISINFORMATION?!

Sorry, I just. Was just on Twitter, and I snapped.

I literally haven't seen one true statement about Israel on social media in MONTHS.

It's gotten to the point that I'm seriously considering starting a sideblog fact-checking all of it.

PLEASE STOP BEING GARFIELD I AM BEGGING ALL OF YOU

BE NERMAL FOR FUCK'S SAKE.

I've written at least one really long post about fact-checking things before. I have another saved as a draft somewhere.

But all you really have to do at this point is GO LOOK AT AN ACTUAL NEWS SOURCE.

What do I mean by an Actual News Source?

An actual news source will tell you where it's getting its information.

Basically: Wikipedia rules apply at all times. Citation. Fucking. Needed.

Except with news articles, I don't mean a detailed footnote.

I mean, if they say, "Rosco Flubberish reported seeing a pig fly across Whatever Place. 'It was a flying pig,' he said," they're fine.

If they say, "Sources close to the President reported that the Department of Farmland Creatures launched a pig into the air this afternoon," they're fine.

If they say, "There have also been reports that pigs flew," they are purely making shit up.

Just check CNN or something. CNN checks their shit, and they're very quick on the draw.

NBC has been very reliable too, in my experience. So have ABC, Newsweek, the Jerusalem Post, the Guardian, the New York Times, the AP, PBS, the Washington Post, and Reuters.

You can break through most paywalls by putting archive.is or 12ft.io before the https:// of the URL. Or just go to either of those sites and paste the URL in the box.

Nobody is perfect. I've seen some articles from all of the above that were accurate, but left things out that I personally thought were important.

Journalists are humans, humans fuck up.

(Also, NONE OF THIS APPLIES TO OPINION PIECES ON ANY TOPIC. Opinion pieces are exactly that: opinions. They don't seem to be fact-checked anywhere, as far as I can tell. They range from super-accurate and informative to complete nonsense.)

(Surprisingly unreliable sources in my experience: Democracy Now, Jacobin, Workers World Party. The latter two act like news sites but are basically running nothing but opinion pieces; Democracy Now can do important deep dives, but I've also seen news coverage from it that was wildly misinformed in that same way.

On the flip side, Slate and the Atlantic are largely opinion -- the Atlantic more than Slate, maybe -- but they often have really well-researched analysis of political situations. Ditto Teen Vogue, and sometimes Vox.)

You don't have to read CNN or the NYT or whateverfor fun. You don't have to make it one of your news sources.

Just. Do a quick check on Google News before you assume anything is true, and then run it through a bullshit filter as described above.

You are being actively lied to, all the time. So am I. We all are.

And people will believe and repeat literally anything that sounds about right.

That's just human nature.

That is WHY none of us are immune to propaganda.

if you want my personal shortlist of Bad Sources, as in Sources That Consistently Publish Absolute Falsehoods:

Any and all state-owned or state-controlled media. For example:

Al Jazeera is owned by the Qatari government, and so are a bunch of other news sites.

Mehr News, the Tehran Times, Al-Quds TV, and Al-Alam are owned by the dictatorship of Iran.

Oops. Looks like every form of broadcast Iranian news media is owned by the dictatorship of Iran, which has a monopoly.

Palestinian Broadcasting Corporation, Palestinian News and Info Agency, and Al-Hayat Al-Jadida are owned by the government of Palestine (the Palestinian Authority)

Al-Aqsa TV and Felesteen are owned by Hamas.

TASS / Russia News Agency, Russia Today, and a fuckton of others are owned by the Russian government.

State Media Monitor seems to do a pretty great job of tracking and listing these things. Check out your own country there!

I specifically listed those ones because some of them (especially Al Jazeera, Mehr News, and TASS) are sites I've seen come up frequently on Tumblr, or in my attempts to fact-check what people are saying here and on Twitter. The rest are just more examples from the same governments.

Al Jazeera deserves special notice because it's become a very popular leftist news source. Believe me, I used to read it all the time too.

It can be reliable and accurate sometimes. But:

It consistently tweets things that are unsourced, never appear anywhere else, and that would be big news you'd expect it to follow up on if they were true. It seems to be following a strategy of "tweet every rumor you hear in case it's true, so you can get the scoop."

It also does this with its liveblogs of the war. And ALL its coverage of the war at this point is liveblogs. So things that are verifiably true will run right next to things that are complete hearsay, but are too long to just tweet.

This is especially dangerous because as far as I can tell, Al Jazeera doesn't delete anything that turns out to be false.

I've also seen regular news articles in Al Jazeera, on multiple topics, that veer from Absolutely True Statements to Wildly Exaggerated Numbers and Speculation. Stuff you wouldn't expect a source on, like statistics or descriptions. And there's no way to tell the difference unless you already know a topic really well, or are fact-checking them while you read.

One especially terrible example, from Gazan activist Ahmed Fouad Alkhatib:

Al Jazeera has never posted or published a correction.

Alkhatib has also blamed it for destabilizing the region, although he's exaggerating about it being Hamas's official propaganda outlet:

TL;DR: If you see a Tumblr post making any kind of factual news statement without a link, at this point you need to assume it is absolutely not true. And either scroll on past, or go check Google News.

If there IS a link, you need to click through to see what it's from and what it actually says.

(Honestly, you need to do that with Wikipedia too. I've repeatedly clicked through on citations that absolutely did not say what the article implied they did.)

And pro tip: on mobile, you can just smack a button to sort Google's news results by most recent, and it helps A LOT. There's gotta be a way to do the same on desktop, but if there is, it's not immediately visible, which sucks.

[hotvintagepoll]

Hi! Quick question - when submitting propaganda, are we only submitting things from the movies in which are scrunglies are…y’know, scrungly? Like take Claude Rains for example, is he only restricted to gifs of him looking like a homeless dude in Moontide(1942) or can we submit like polished headshots or whatnot? Just thought I’d ask beforehand! I’m so stoked for this poll!!

The polls are about scrungliness, not hotness, so please submit propaganda that you feel conveys scrungliness. Generic hot photos won't be boosted because this is not a hot tournament.

With that said, please be considerate of how you're framing scrungliness. I'm going to post more about this tomorrow but some propaganda submissions had a troubling habit of conflating difference with scrungliness, and it really bothers me. Like in this ask—be careful about how you're throwing the word "homeless" in like it's shorthand for weird, ok? Being homeless is just...being homeless. It doesn't make you weird or strange and it shouldn't be used that way. The casual tone some of the submitted propaganda had toward class/race/disability has really bothered me and I'll post a longer discussion of this before the tournament starts.

[l0stfoster]

What's your opinion on Cursed Tulsa OC's?

Answering this real quick bc I just got the notification for it but I am SO open for OC's!! The AU in itself is a creative medium, I'd love to see how you guys would find a way to merge any Outsiders OCs you have into the mix! Hell, I did the same thing when posting about Sam. I like to imagine OCs would simply pop up in the background as extras; it also opens up the chance to experiment with the types of curses that populate Tulsa!

I think my only criterion for OCs within the AU is that you don't break away from characters' canon plotlines or their relationships, and don't make them weirdly overpowered. I don't think I need to specify that problematic shit is a no-go. For example, an OC can't interrupt something like Two's jumping or Dally's near-death experience, nor can they do something like impact the familial relationships characters (like Ace, Two, n Dally) have. A curse-related example is that an OC can't be a witch unless they're related to Paul, due to his bloodline being directly tied to the curse's creation. Soc OCs are sort of difficult to go about since they aren't supposed to have curses, but if you'd like to give them one, just keep that and power balance in mind. Things like omnipotence or reality-bending are also off the table due to generally being very overpowered, apologies </3. I'd love to see you guys experiment, though! There might be a few things that don't work with what's currently set in stone (ie; something like a centaur curse wouldn't exist) so don't be afraid to ask if you aren't sure!! Shipping OCs with Canon is where stuff gets a little,, messy. Since a lot of the plot does include focusing on pairings (such as QPR Johnny & Pony, or Darry x Paul) I don't really know how someone could go about doing that while keeping it canon to the AU's plot. I'd definitely recommend waiting to character-ship until I can get our sexualities/relationships listing posted since that'll provide some clarity to what the writers and I think, even though I like to leave stuff up to interpretation. You can draw ship art of your OC's with them if you'd like, but there's a lot of grey area at this time. TLDR: OC's are welcome and, to an extent, canon in the plotline as background and world fillers. I'd love to see how you guys merge your characters in, but avoid OC x Canon for now.

[slashingdisneypasta]

Good Day for It Thugs x Reader || Excerpts

Plot: Lyle gets stolen from, again, and he's taking his anger out on his men. You know you should stay quiet, you know you need to stay quiet, but when he goes for Him- you cant.

Includes: Dale Acton, Norman Tyrus and Wayne Jackson.

Warnings: Lyle being violent and RUDE.

Tagging: @marinerainbow and @slxsherwriter .

Dale Acton:

You could see it coming, the way Lyle was walking around with that 'everything belongs to me' air about him. When he started to wander too close to Dale for your tastes, you kept your eye on him from you spot sitting very very still on the couch. You wonder- would he d a r e? Would he d a r e hurt Dale in your house? Under your roof??

He's really mad, you think. He very well might. And a morbid part of yourself wishes he would try; see what happens.

You kept your eyes on him, but were too slow.

Dale had a cut across his cheek bone from the metal ring Lyle wore after he hit him, and you saw red.

After checking on Dale, brushing your knuckles against his cheek and asking are you okay?... quietly; getting a huffy nod from him, because his pride smarts at getting hit like that by an old guy and not being able to do shit about it, you nod and promptly turn around. You take two steps, one past Norman and one past Wayne, and then lunge.

-Norman catches you and drags your ass back to Dale kicking and wriggling and cursing at Lyle, but you're not afraid of Lyle fucking Tyrus. Or you just love Dale that much. Either way- now he knows it; staring at you being held back by Dale with his arms around you, in breathless disbelief.

"Baby, c'mon- you gotta calm down, please. You cant hurt him, he'll getcha back. He'll fucken kill you. Calm down, please, c'mon. Please please, baby, please. Listen to me. Listen- t's not worth it, its just a scratch. C'mon- I need you- I need you to-- fucking calm down- "

Norman Tyrus:

"- Excuse me?" Lyle asks, turning to look at you over his shoulder. You said something you shouldn't have, but you're too pissed right now to take it back.

"You heard me- " Norman tries to stop you, put his hands on your shoulders and make you calm down right now- remember who you're talking to- but you're perfectly well aware of who you're fucking talking to and you shrug him off of you. "Norman does everything around here. And what grunt work he doesn't do, Dale or Wayne do. You don't do shit except talk big. You're just the weird guy who just has to take his clothes off when he kills someone but they let you do it anyway cuz it makes you happy- and thats how you deal with delusional people. You placate them."

"... watch your bitch." Lyle tells his brother, not even addressing you directly, and your anger fire gets even hotter.

"You watch me. And- and how dare you try to hit him?? How does you decrepit, senile ass assume you have any right? How dare you."

After a moment of silence inside the dank barn; you glaring hard at Lyle and him looking pissed off and disbelieving back at you, finally, and Norman just standing there waiting to see what Lyle (Or you, apparently) will do next... Lyle shifts his gaze heavily off you and to his brother again. You get ready to open your mouth and yell at him again, but this time he beats you to it. "Get them outta here. Or I'll kill them."

"No- " Before you can even finish the single-syllable word, Norman's forcing you out of the room. Actually forcing you, you think your arm's gonna bruise! When you're out and the door closes though he immediately lets you go. "... what?" You spit defensively when you notice him looking at you with that same monotonous second-in-command look he was giving inside.

... after a long, impregnable moment, Norman bursts out into an amused smirk, chuckling. "Jesus christ, Y/N."

Wayne Jackson:

You were shocked stick-still and wide eyed to see Lyle hit his own brother, giving him a blood nose, but when his evil gaze fell on Wayne your eyes narrowed.

You didn't even realise you'd moved until you were face-to-face with Lyle and his terrifying soulless eyes; You'd stuck yourself directly in front of Wayne. Put yourself immediately in Lyle's path.

And you're not at all scared; settling Wayne's even worse cousin with a terrible glower of your own. The look on your face reads 'try me'.

"... get out of my way."

You reach back and pinch the cuff of Wayne's jacket between your fingers, almost as if to demonstrate ownership. "Back, the fuck, off." Why are you suddenly so protective of Wayne?? You're not entirely sure he needs it and he certainly doesn't deserve it, but the thought of this man attacking him - making him bleed, making him hurt, - , fills you up with a hot, frustrated, pissed-off feeling something like anger but worse. Meaner. When Lyle doesn't back up at all, and instead his eye twitches out of irritation, you raise your chin up and show him how determined you are.

Wayne's behind you and you can feel his presence as loudly as if he spoke, which he doesn't. He doesn't utter a damn word, uncharacteristically, but when Lyle's gaze shifts to something behind you you imagine the scary stony look on his face backing you up (again, uncharacteristically).

When Lyle's gaze shifts back to yours Wayne squeezes your arm and you give Lyle one last silencing look, daring him to say anything, before taking Wayne's hand in yours and guiding him away.

[okkqtsu]

so was the foreshadowing real because...

[hella1975]

i cannot stand the aot fandom this is not a new take at all they are universally intolerable but oh my dayssss u are FORBIDDEN from making ANY take about the show it's actually insane to watch. 'aot is perfect' no show is perfect. 'tell me you didnt get the show 😂🫵' people have different opinions/interpretations about things. 'eren is a good guy they could never make me hate him' i think there's actually 4 seasons and two movies explicitely using him as a tool to show that no one is 'good' or 'evil' they are only trying to survive. hello. the fandom r all so far up aot's ass that they actually discredit its writing in the process and it would be laughable if it wasn't so frustrating

[uncanny-tranny]

Bodily autonomy extends to people doing things with their bodies that you, personally, do not like.

One thing I am very tired of seeing is people spreading the idea that certain procedures or bodily adornments should be outlawed simply because they don't think it's "right." For example, I saw a person spreading a person's nose job result around, saying it should be illegal to do this procedure. But we have no idea why this person got it. You can absolutely criticize beauty culture without resorting to spreading peoples' image without consent, or shaming individuals who recieve certain procedures. Additionally, you can encourage individuals to reflect on their choices and why they want certain things, but you cannot expect them to ultimately conform to what you think is best.

We can advance the idea that all bodies are worthy inherently and no matter what, but we ought to continue to do so regardless of if that body has had changes made to it. "Your body, your choice" as an ideology extends to making choices others don't like.

Again: When you don't own your body, you own nothing.

[im-getting-help]

It doesn't matter how many times i read this in fics, Felix playing wonderwall for Oliver is never not going to be funny 💀👌🏻

[dustteller]

Yknow, I think this passage really captures how Ouyang views Esen, especially in contrast with how Baoxiang views Esen. Ouyang geuinely believes the best of Esen, he genuinely belives that Esen is good and pure and kind and that it's himslef that is taining him into being otherwise. And while Ouyang is right in that he's technically responsible for Esen’s current emotional state (he did very much kill Esen’s dad and frame his brother for it, that is very much a thing he just did), for once it isn't his fault for the everything else going on with Esen?

I do think Esen is generally good-natured, and tries to be kind and generous to those he loves, but it's very clear that Ouyang has reduced him to JUST that in his head. He only sees Esen’s best qualities as inherent to him, and all the bad ones are Ouyang's fault somehow. He blames himself for Esen not understanding him (because there's something wrong with him, and even when he's mad at Esen for not caring enough to notice certain things he justifies it in his head by making it about his own unmanliness or whatever and Esen is just to perfect for that), for any failure in battle (yeah you're the general but Esen also approved this hes your boss dude), and generally for any moment where Esen exhibits less than stellar behaviour/capacity/etc. When in reality, we have a lot of moments where Esen is just sort of a dick, many of which are pre-ouyang (courtesy of HWDtW wbx flashbacks, which, granted, are also biased but my point still stands). We see Esen's constant and usually unjustified frustration with wbx and sometimes Ouyang, we see him be dismissive of the things they tell him, in the pre-order reward its pretty much stated that he makes a habit of dumping Ouyang outside brothels for hours while he goes inside to get laid, in one of his first scenes we see how much he enjoys it when Ouyang spends the whole morning tormenting Altan (altho tbf he kinda deserved it, altan suuuccckkss), and in general Esen just kinda treats people like crap sometimes. He's snapish and short-tempered and stubborn and imperious, loves whining about stuff, and is a shitty brother and best friend. He's got a lot of good qualities too, like how he's one of the few people that treats Ouyang with respect and tries to treat him as an equal, how his first reaction when wbx is insulted is to come to his defense (even if wbx usually foils his attempts by immediately clapping back and storming off), how we see him recognize he gets frustrated witj wbx too easily and tries to hold his temper back, how he immediately self-sacrifices to save Ouyang from his dad, how even after thinking wbx killed their dad he does really want to forgive him.

My point is, Esen is trying, but he's a very flawed human being, and Ouyang just can't seem to grasp that. He looks at him with rose-colored glasses. And it's so interesting that amongst all the shitty things Ouyang has done (and this duology really just is Ouyang and WBX fuck up yuan dynasty china to truly Epic proportions), the one he feels worst about is the one that isn't actually his fault (sorta). He may have killed Chaghan and been the catalyst for Esen's emotional blow up, but he isn't responsible for Esen having the capacity to burn WBX's books. That was Esen's decision. He hasn't somehow manipulated Esen into an eviler, crueler version of himself by virtue of existing evil-y and eunuch-y and revengefully im his vicinity. Esen was always capable of this, even if we take out Ouyang's actual manipulations, and I think this whole I-tainted-hin mentality really encapsulates how fucked up their relationship and Ouyang's mental state are in general. After all, Ouyang doesn't feel bad about the murder, or the framing, and he feels guilt about causing Esen pain, but most of all, he feels absolutely terrible that he's shattered what he sees as Esen’s purity, which in reality is mostly just the pedestal he himslef put him on. Man, what a fucked up little guy.

[miss-sheepy]

Darr headshot 🐲

[plushie-lovey]

How do you decide which plushie to cuddle with everyday? I try to change it up so everyone gets cuddles but I worry that some don’t get enough even with me just carrying around the few that live on my bed because they help my anxiety best

Most of the plush that get cuddles are part of the Bed Squad. I cuddle them depending on my mood honestly. I look at em and I know it's their turn. They've also gotta be a good hugging size, around 8 inches or larger. So plush like Lil Guy, Lil Vee, Cosmo, Wanda, and Squish don't get picked (not that they aren't loved on in some form tho. I'll usually cup them in my hands and hold them to my cheek for nuzzles). There are a few plush that are cuddled more than others, though, but the others don't get jealous.

Some plushies have the designated job of being a Cuddle Plush! They're the ones that I'll hold when I sleep or when I'm not feeling well. Plushies like Wawa the frog, and Chubbychu the pikachu, Binky, and The Baby. Cuddle Plush is it's own job, because with it the plushies have to deal with things like: getting dirty quicker than their regular plushie counterparts, getting tears or drool on them, risking flattening, discoloration, seams getting torn, etc.

Not every stuffed animal is up for the task of enduring such things. So they get less cuddles, but that makes the ones they get more special!

[waywardsalt]

small little thing abt botw/totk and the future of zelda games considering it seems likely that future zelda games might be in the same style as those two and how i feel like botw/totk don't actually feel like zelda games (kind of messy i just typed this out in a kind of informal or whatever way) (this post is long af btw so uhhhh yeah)

im part of the group that claims that botw/totk aren't 'real' zelda games but... i guess they are technically 'real' zelda games, but... they sure as fuck don't feel like it, and because of that, i'm not at all excited with the idea of future loz games being in the same style, especially with the pitfalls these last two games have fallen into having been things that past zelda games did especially well, it feels like things have been sort of flipped on their heads in terms of what's being valued or whatever

like... the best parts of older zelda games were things like the story and the characters and the puzzles and the dungeons and stuff like that... the best parts of botw/totk right now are just the gameplay. people enjoy these new characters, but they dont have the narrative backing that older games do, they don't have the same impactful arcs or roles allowed by a more linear story

the point i want to get at though is how botw/totk honestly don't feel like direct evolutions or steps up from past zelda games but rather just... entirely different game styles (open world games) with the zelda flavoring and worldbuilding and story styling slapped on top.

i mean... i feel like a half-decent example of some other well-known franchises that have jumped on this (honestly kind of thoughtless) open-world bandwagon are mario (mario odyssey) pokemon (sword/shield and scarlet/violet) fire emblem (kind of. with some free-walking segments in 3 houses and engage) and the soulsborne type games (elden ring), these are all other well known and storied game series' that have somewhat made the move to open world, and i think that switch was a bit smoother, kept the core and integrity of the games that came before much better than botw/totk did

elden ring is the easiest to explain- the gameplay loop and core mechanics are the same and build upon past games' you just have more room to run around and get killed in with some little open-world flourishes like material gathering.

fire emblem is... a bit less flexible in terms of changing up the core gameplay, and the addition of open-world segments are added to add bonuses to the strategy gameplay and allow for more support-building oppourtunities and little minigames, and its more or less evolution from echoes' dungeon-crawling bits and the customizable castle in fates. the core gameplay still effectively works the exact same, just with some little class or mechanic tweaks and additions.

mario odyssey, though each world was pretty massive, still had your typical 3d mario platforming, and the new hat stuff fit in pretty well with olderpowerups and gimmicks, and the boss battles feel and work pretty similarly to the way they used it- odyssey does feel like an evolution from past mario games (ps. playing two-player with one person as cappy snaps the game in half. its the secret easy mode lol)

the new pokemon games are pretty much just the same as past pokemon games, theyre just open world and buggy as fuck rip have extra little open-world flourishes that build on what past games set up. the battling works the same as ever and the progression is the same with a number of powerful trainers you have to battle to continue forward.

with botw/totk... the progression is dramatically different in terms of power-scaling, world presentation, item-gathering, puzzle-solving... pretty much everything in the established zelda format. i get that it was pretty much the aim with botw to have a fresh start and throw out a lot of the old standards but it just makes them feel so dramatically alien to past zelda games; theyre completely different experiences in pretty much every single way, and as such they dont feel like what we've (well, people who have started with and spent a lot of time with other loz games) learned to associate with the zelda titles.

with open world games in general it's a bit harder to have a truly impactful narrative akin to those in past zelda games, anyways. i will admit that botw was a good execution of trying out something entirely new, and the narrative and gameplay and world actually complement each other very well, so despite what i've said in the past I can't really fault it's narrative too much since it's a less traditional sort of narrative and effectively does what it aims to do very well.

totk, on the other hand, proves that this style of game does not mesh with the old style of storytelling at ALL. linear games can have proper narratives with coherent stakes, developing characters, twists and reveals and building emotion and mood- and all of that is thrown out the window with totk when they decided to try and have both a more linear story with actual reveals and development and emotion, while also letting you literally spoil it for yourself out the gate.

you can't really have a well-executed story when players are capable of doing things drastically out of order and of jumping into story beats without the prior buildup and straight-up ruining what could be otherwise emotional reveals, and players being capable of doing this is hard-baked in how the game fundamentally works. I honestly feel bad for people who found the fifth sage by accident before anything else.

you can't effectively have a linear story with character growth and plot developments and impactful moments while also allowing it to be experienced out of order and with massive time gaps in between; with this kind of stuff, you can't really have your cake and eat it too. say what you will about the linearity of past zelda games, but i bet you that midna wouldn't be as beloved as a character as she is if it weren't for the linear order of the story and its events. certain parts of storytelling may demand for a linear manner of telling that story.

botw's story works because none of the memories reveal anything groundbreaking taht you don't already know; they are optional and merely give you more information about these characters from link's past and simply inform you about the girl keeping ganon at bay. if you find a late memory first, that's fine- it technically doesnt reveal anything too important to you, it just fills in some gaps for you and your player character. it makes sense within the story itself for the world to be so open and for you to be able to do what you can; the story is not the focus, nor is it even needed to beat the game. the story was made with the gameplay and what you are allowed to do in mind, and as such doesn't include things such as in-depth character development or important plot-twists.

on the other hand, you can easily spoil totk's biggest plot twist in a handful of different ways completely by accident, just by getting curious about the world around you. this can shatter a lot of the mystery or tension in the plot and this can happen completely by accident to someone playing the game organically and blindly. the story itself doesn't take this into account, it reads more like a linear story that would be more suited to a linear style of play, coming across things in order to ramp up the stakes and let things be revealed at the best possible time. (tbh totk's story doesnt seem to take the player into account in general, if the game forcing you to watch basically the same long cutscene four fucking times says anything, jesus christ)

narrative pitfalls aside, botw/totk put heavy emphasis on gameplay, but not in the same way older zelda games did, and as such trade away the unique items and gimmick-y game-specific mechanics for a small toolset handed to you out the gate. what botw/totk do- giving you everything you need from the start and having very little true varation in the gameplay from then on out- make sense and works just fine for an open world game. there is, however, a lack of actual depth to that gameplay that other open world games do have (off the top of my head, the ability to unlock and upgrade abilities and have general character upgrades in fenyx rising as well as the impressive depths of elden ring's combat and character customization system). the most depth botw/totk has to the actual gameplay is just the fourish different weapon types and the ways you use your fourish abilities (saying fourish bc for real ultrahand and fuse are fundamentally the exact same thing). there is also just raising the little defense numbers on your armor and getting more stamina and health, but that does absolutely nothing to the actual gameplay but make link more durable.

i mean, sure, health in past loz games just makes link more durable, too, but thats how health upgrades in any other game work.

the gameplay switch makes sense, considering the switch from a linear puzzle-adventure concentric game to a more sandbox-esque open-world game, but it does not mesh with the former loz formula at all, so while the shift in style makes sense, it makes me think that you can't have a previous-style loz experience in an open-world sandboxish sort of game. especially with how in totk you can very easily bypass most of the fire temple just using the mechanics handed to you at the start. you can't have the same type of zelda dungeons in a game where you are allowed to do it 'wrong' and the game itself does not allow for the same kinds of puzzles.

i am of the opinion that so long as future zelda games work the same way botw/totk did, we will not get old-school zelda-style dungeons again.

the loss of a variety of items used for specific puzzles and environment switches is the loss of a varied dungeon experience and the loss of the same kind of world and character progression as past zelda games.

you are handed everything you'll ever need at the start of botw/totk. the only thing that will meaningfully change is how much damage you do. there are no alternate strategies opened up by new items that can double as weapons, no new traversal options or routes opened up by things such as grappling hooks or clawshots or whips or specific wands. even the battle system is drastically different, instead of being enemies that take specific amounts of hits to die while you can obtain progressively stronger swords, enemies are just damage sponges and you can get all kind of weapons that just do different numerical amounts of damage.

the bosses themselves- big staples and draws of zelda games- also work extremely differently. instead of having to leverage specific items to expose weak spots or having to fight in a specific manner to do damage, you are just asked to... do damage. even in totk's bosses, where sage abilities are most certainly helpful, the only boss i found to truly require a sage ability was the lighting temple's boss; the others i either hardly used the sage at all (i didn't use yunobo at all in the second phase of the fire temple boss and hardly had a need for tulin with the wind temple boss [esp considering i was using a 3-shot lynel bow to make the poor fucker a cakewalk]) or found that alternative solutions felt better, like resorting to splash fruit on repeat water temple fights instead of wrestling with having to activate and use sidon's ability. the sages are honestly fairly poor replacements for dungeon specific items.

this kind of causes botw/totk to play more like a poor man's dark souls or just like any other open world rpgish game. i don't play botw/totk for the experience of a zelda game, i play it because it's an open world game that i can walk around in for five minute before switching to something else because i liked something in that other game better.

the combat in botw/totk isnt designed in such a way that makes it feel good. mineru's mech is fucking dismal, but since it's just either shooting with a bow or attacking with one of three types of melee weapon with some timing for a dodge, it can get stale fast. it doesn't necessarily even feel good, since there's not enough variety for it to get really engaging. (this is def an uneven comparison, but elden ring's combat feels considerable better with the different dodges you can do and the amount of attack options you have with just one weapon, not to mention the amount of control you have over your general fighting style.) combat in botw/totk at hour 1 is the exact same as combat in botw/totk at hour 100, the only different being the amount of damage you do or how much of a beating you can take.

it just... the styles of botw/totk can't allow them to feel the same as older zelda games. the shift in style was clearly a good move to draw in series newbies and shake things up, but it comes at the caveat of making them feel distant from their predecessors and uncomfortably similar to other games like them. it's hard to avoid comparisons with elden ring when on the surface they are very similar games, one just feels more true to its core identity

this all is said without mentioning the way in which botw/totk lore feels almost dismissive of past series staples and seems intent on not looking back while also taking every fucking attempt to nudge you and say 'hey, remember that zelda game' and honestly all that shit does is make me want to play a different zelda game.

botw/totk seem altogether very desperate to distance themselves from past zelda games while also being unable to really tear itself from what came before and it just culminates in me spotting linebeck island on the map and going 'damn i miss linebeck' and turning the fucking game off to play phantom hourglass instead. say what you will about phantom hourglass, but it certainly handles its story progression and character development infinitely better than the game that lets you accidentally shatter the impact of the story by deciding to check out that cool temple in the distance of the depths

[oldmanyaoi-jpeg]

i think the concept of saw trap logic has done wonders for both my mental health and how i deal with some of the godawful posts on this website. it kind of reframes them in the same light as scams for me

it kinda goes something like "is this a genuine argument, or is this post an elaborate setup (making up a guy, worst faith interpretation, etc) to convince me i'm a terrible person without making me think to question it"

[no-light-left-on]

hot take but taking every hearsay or rumor or book in a fictional universe for fact is bad understanding of the world as the story presents it, actually