#theres. so much more to this and a whole line of thought i will absolutely. get into. one day. hopefully from my end

[abyssalpriest]

Actually, have this comment on the godhood document

From Lev, original post:

What you need to know is this: The common denominator in magic, incarnation, and godhood is all about types of body creation in order to influence the part of reality you want to influence, creating a body of that type (or nearest to it as you can) to play with it. Magic - or the Priest's understanding of what is classed under that word - is very relevant and begins to explain what a god does and is, which is basically a constantly sustained and expansive set of spells or what is tapped into when doing spells that reaches out into reality.

(...) to consciously go and interact with something distant to you whether physically distant or conceptually, you need to take up a form that interacts more strongly with your intended target.(C1)

Comment from today:

D: Question. This kinda implies moving outwards right, bodies to bodies to bodies as you implied in the whole magic being about finer and finer bodies until dissipation. What's stopping incarnation of... we'll say sort of stitching yourself from one part of manifested existence/Reality to another - what's the efficiency of creating body chains rather than creating just two bodies?

L: You need to look at why consciousness incarnates in the first place. Take your plane for existence. Physical bodies require constant sustenance to move, right? Yet it's so much more efficient and costs less energy to navigate, change, manipulate, so on this plane than trying to do so from "behind the veil" so-to-speak.

You have to understand that Matter is a state of the world's being, Matter affects Matter more strongly than Consciousness does, and vice versa. Think of it sort of like... loading a game and keeping files loaded rather than trying to load and put back data every single millisecond of a simulated game. Matter is memory, is Consciousness solidified, it sort of references and is the references for all the things Consciousness is the on-the-fly equivalent of, it lowers the processing power of God needed to sustain and change reality. If you wanted to alter a document, would you type it out from scratch every time? Or would you simply save a copy - even many copies - of the document and alter that instead?

Having many copies of the same thing seems like it wastes more processing power than typing it from scratch each time, but really, no. It is far easier to incarnate into a physical body than to, at each and every moment, be pushing things "through the veil" to kick a ball down the street. An immense amount of energy would be used... But take advantage of the saving and memory and data collections in the world? Efficiency, wouldn't you say?

[angelwishess]

𝜗𝜚 Floyra Intro Post !

❝Because theres no one on the land or in the sea more in sync than those two.❞

|| playlist. || moodboard. || pinterest quotes. || pinterest board. || (<- in the “Dynamic w Floyd” section!) { A more “emotional” yap session of Floyra and how much deeper their relationship is }

— Floyra Content Masterlist

Floyra is the ship of my main oc, Kyra and Floyd! Kyra is my Yuusona twisted from the Disney Princess Stereotype.

This intro post is just to graph out the timeline and details of their relationship. Funfacts at the end :3 (Fair warning though, this ended up being SUPER long… So feel free just to skip to the funfacts if you want HAHAHA)

Please note I may or may not have changed some things in the canon storyline for my own amusement hehe. Nothing too major though.

Tropes :

Idiots to Lovers, Bestfriends to Lovers, Soulmates, literally the DENSEST people ever … Actually they’re more like cowards. Mutual pining, mutual SIMPING they ADORE eachother they are absolutely WHIPPED, chaotic lovey dovey couple, tooth-rotting fluff, no i mean seriously this is the fluffiest ship EVER, they make eachother both better and worse simultaniously. They share the same braincell. Basically already a couple before they even start dating but they dont realize it.

Kyra: “What?? Ofc we’re not dating lmao wdym we’re just friends!!” <- just held his face tenderly and looked into his eyes adoringly while calling him the prettiest boy in the world and kissing his face all over

Floyd: “yeah lol why would u think that” <- arm around her waist, basically always looking at her with a dopey grin and heart eyes

First Impressions

When Floyd heard that there was an unexpected appearance of a magicless student at the entrance ceremony that blazed in with a flaming fire tanuki and set fire to the mirror chamber, he was intrigued. When he learned that very same student was, quite literally, from an entirely different world, he was even more intrigued.

Not to mention the fact she lived in that rundown, deteriorating 'dorm' that was literally called Ramshackle, and she was almost expelled with two other guppies on the very first day of school.

But, when he saw her for himself he was... Disappointed.

Often times she just stood by the sidelines, seemingly in her own world with a far-off look in her eyes and an empty smile that ticked him off for no apparent reason.

She never reacted to anything, letting people walk over her like some sort of welcome mat. Somehow, she didn't even feel alive.

To put it bluntly— Floyd thought she was boring.

Just a wimpy, puny little shrimp who didn't even have any magic. Who wouldn't even run away if her life was on the line, weak and defenseless. Naive. How boring, and here he thought he had another play thing... But wheres the fun if he doesn't get a reaction out of it? How lame.

Kyra and Floyd only officially met during book 2.

Kyra passed by Floyd a bunch of times before— but never actually ‘saw’ him. Floyd on the other hand, already had an opinion of Kyra.

Seeing her just simply standing by the sidelines again and saying nothing and just… Staring. He decided to finally approach her straight up.

Deciding to give her a squeeze for the fun of it— he didn’t expect at all for her to hug him back and basically turn the situation on him instead. It flustered him, and made him walk away from the whole scene out of confusion and embarrassment.

Despite everything, Kyra thought Floyd was amusing. and insanely pretty.

Building Interest …

As time passed they seemed to keep catching glimpses of eachother. And with each passing day, she seemed to get more and more... Interesting.

Facing overblots despite having no magic, causing trouble left and right and getting into such ridiculous situations it makes you wonder how she does everything she does without getting tired of how absurd it all is.

When his first impression of her was her being ‘boring', his second was her being naive. How else could you explain it? She had to be either ridiculously brave or incredibly stupid and naive to do the things that she does.

Kyra, however, noticed Floyd from time to time. She noticed how he’d say and do things without caring how other people viewed him. He did things because he wants to, and doesn’t because he doesn’t want to.

He was so… Free. So unapologetically himself. So full of life, and genuinity. He was alive. Kyra couldn’t help but be a little jealous… Couldn’t help but admire him. Because everytime she looked at him, and saw him… Being him, she always wondered: Could I be like that, too?

Kyra and Floyd don’t have any notable interactions until the main events of Book 3.

When Kyra decided to strike up a deal with Azul to free all of the students under a contract— Floyd thought she was stupid. Naive, and way too easy of a target. It was laughable. It basically confirmed everything he thought of her.

As Floyd and Jade were monitoring Kyra and Grim as they packed up their things, Kyra acted as if nothing major was happening. Talking to them and cracking jokes like they were old friends. It was then Floyd and Kyra found out they might be more similar than they thought, saying the same things at the same time and holding the same opinions.

When Kyra almost dropped a bag of her things, Floyd helped from impulse. He laughed it off, but Kyra decided to give him a kiss on the cheek as a ‘thank you’.

He froze in place. Not expecting that kind of reaction from her once again, and just kind of… Staring at her as she passed. Jade had another laugh at his brother.

When Kyra first saw Floyd in his merform, he took the chance to try and scare her a little. Just for fun. But just like before— it totally backfired, and Kyra just looked at her with the same wonder as she did the first time. She had the nerve to call him ‘Beautiful’ under her breath, too.

So, Floyd simply swam away after realizing she wasn’t going to give him the reaction he wanted, deciding to play with someone who will.

But when he tried to attack a nearby friend of hers— She punched him straight in the face! A fire burning in her eyes as she straight up threatened him.

Floyd was… Confused. Confused about Kyra, i mean. One moment she was staring at him like he was a of work of art, the next shes throwing hands at him with zero hesitation. He thought she was a pushover— but maybe he was wrong.

She had guts, though. Thats for sure. A magicless little thing like her deciding to put her hands up and fight, even threatening him? A 13ft long eelmer that could rip her apart without a sweat? Something about it.. Scared him a little. Ending up with a bloodied nose, staring down someone who didn’t show any fear or any regret.

Floyd always wanted a challenge. But did he expect that challenge to come in a 5’8 package, decorated with pretty pink bows? No, not at all.

But thats something. And boy, does Floyd love the thrill of the unexpected. After this interaction that past intrigue he had in her before came back 2 times stronger.

It only worsened when Kyra’s little plan to destroy Azul’s contracts actually worked… And Floyd got chills seeing the look on her face.

It was so unlike what he thought of her. A big, smug grin. The face of someone who knows they already won. It was almost malicious. And it was then he realized— she wasn’t as dumb or as naive as he thought she was, either.

But when they got back to the Lounge, it so happened that Leona seemed to have missed one, single contract. When they spotted it, Kyra was the first to react. Managing to grab it before Azul.

Azul wasn’t too happy about it, screeching and yelling for her to give it to him, grabbing her while doing so.

And in that moment of tension, of fear and action, she did something that shocked everyone. In the face of danger, she held the sole contract tightly in her hands and she—

…She ate the contract.

She shoved the glowing papering in her mouth, and swallowed the thing. And it worked. Honestly they didn’t know which was more ridiculous… Her decision, or the fact it was a success.

She grinned so widely, so proudly. She had the nerve to even laugh in Azul’s face. “Yeah, thats right! Screw you, octoboy!”

Floyd couldn’t surpress the laughter that bubbled up his throat watching it all go down. The sound of her laugh ringing in his ears. It was just so… Ridiculous. She was ridiculous.

She had just outsmarted Azul… And the best solution she could think of was to eat the contract? It was downright cartoonish!

But when Azul overblotted, Floyd got to see Kyra in action. He was surprised all over again. But he should be used to it by now, he should expect it. She just keeps surprising him.

She was no pushover— rising up to the challenge when needed. Even if she still acted unserious, even if she acted goofy and wild, she still got down to business and made it work nonetheless.

And he realized she wasn’t anything like what he thought of her before. She was… Nothing like what he thought. Always surpassing his expectations of her no matter how much they changed.

Everytime he thought he had her figured out, she goes and does something that makes him rethink it all over again…

She was very, very interesting. And now, shes got his full attention.

Strangers to Besties!

After the main events of Book 3, Floyd had started following around Kyra more often. Actually, scratch that. He started following her around constantly. She eventually apologized for punching him in the face, too. Surprisingly.

Realizing they were actually very similar, they began hanging out more and more, until they eventually became an inseperable duo that everyone knew about.

At first, most were surprised. Kyra had only just started coming out of her shell, so most were still under the impression she was a sweet, mild mannered young girl.

But after befriending Floyd— all of her self-control truly did go flying out of the window. If she was bad before, she was even worse now. Freely skipping classes more often without a care to go find Floyd, trying to juggle live fish in the courtyard, or jumping out of a window just to escape some of the staff. and the like.

Late night adventures, dancing in the rain, sneaking out of class, spontaneous hang outs and sleepovers, pulling pranks and causing trouble left and right… They were so in sync, its was scary. Kyra was almost like a second Floyd, and everyone knew that it was probably best to run in the other direction when you see them side by side.

No matter what the situation, they always had eachother’s back, too.

It was strange to think they were ever strangers. They felt like they’ve known eachother for years— thats how well they’ve grown to know eachother. They were as thick as thieves!

Hanging out everyday, whenever they could, they just had so much fun together all the time!

To everyone’s dismay, of course. They were far too in sync, if the chaos around one of them was bad it combined when they were together.

Floyd finally found someone who could keep up with him, and even better, keep him on his toes. Kyra surprised him everyday, and thats what he loved. He found someone who understood him, too.

Kyra on the otherhand, found someone who encouraged all of her once repressed desires. She found someone she could be herself with, with no fear of judgement.

Never one without the other, those two. Wherever Kyra was Floyd was surely close to follow, and wherever Floyd was Kyra was most definetly near. They followed eachother around, always stayed close to one another.

Slowly, they’ve grown to not only seek eachother out to go and have fun, but also for comfort.

Platonic ..?

What started as a simple friendship which focused on the high of ‘having fun’ and causing trouble, or just basically being partners in crime— slowly turned into something much more… Intimate.

When Floyd stormed all the way to Ramshackle after a bad day at Mostro Lounge, he didn’t really know what to expect, he just wanted to get away from everyone else and Ramshackle was the best place he could think of.

He didn’t expect Kyra to be so caring. Pulling him into her arms and running her fingers through his hair while encouraging him to rant.

Kyra had always been an affectionate person, he knew that. It started small— little kisses on the cheek and forehead from Kyra to him, hugs and the like. But this was different. It felt different, atleast.

The way she held him felt different, and the way her lips gently kissed his skin made all of the stress from before sizzle into nothing.

He couldn’t help but melt, and before they knew it this became a routine for them, too.

They grew to find themselves comfortable being vulnerable around eachother. Showing sides of themselves to eachother most wouldn’t see. And they knew eachother better than anyone else did.

Simple, friendly touches became something more. The playful wrap of Floyd’s arm around her waist became tighter, and Kyra’s touches on him lingered for longer. Suddenly the playful ‘I Love You’s didn’t seem platonic anymore— atleast not with the way they looked at eachother while they said it.

Simply seeking eachother out to go cause chaos turned into seeking eachother out to just simply be in eachother’s presence instead. Whatever activity they did started to come second, and as long as they were together they were as happy as could be.

Of course, they never recognized this change. In their point of view, they’ve always been like this. But everyone else can see as plain as day, that something definetly changed.

It was painful for everyone involved, really. For some reason neither of them seemed to acknowledge the obvious feelings between eachother.

Everyone could see the way they looked at eachother, the way they acted around eachother… Everything was so painfully blatant… But they still couldn’t admit it. Even when the lines between friendship and intimacy began to blur.

Realizations!

Nothing about their relationship really changed at this point. They just kind of realized their romantic feelings after being deep in denial for WAYY too long.

The first to realize their feelings was actually Kyra, believe it or not. Which is funny because shes never been the best at realizing her own emotions in general.

It happened when Floyd said something that struck her with that arrow of realization. She asked one day, why exactly does he hang around her, asking if it was because she was pretty. She was only half joking, there was a part of her that genuinely wondered why he stuck around her for so long. Even she didn’t expect this friendship to last… But it did. And she can’t imagine her life without him in it anymore.

And thats exactly why she asked. Though she was smiling, she was somewhat scared of what he’d say.

“What? ‘Course not. Why’d I ever care about something as stupid as that?”

That shocked Kyra straight to her core. It was something so simple, yet it was new to her. She, who has never been valued for anything other than her beauty.

For a moment, that facade of false bravado faded, it cracked and her smile dropped. Genuinely surprised at how quickly he answered, and how honest he seemed while saying it.

“I like you because you’re fun. I don’t give a damn about how pretty you are, if you were boring I would’ve ditched ya a long time ago! Hahaha!”

She couldn’t do anything but stare. “…You think i’m fun?” “Well— Yeah. The most fun person I’ve ever met. I’ve never gotten bored with ya, Sea Angel!“ again, it was something so simple. Almost childish, in a way.

But yet… Something like that made her heart race faster than it did when facing any kind of danger.

She swears her heart was trying to escape from her chest with how fast and how hard it was beating against her ribcage. And her stomach began to turn… Is this what they call ‘getting butterflies’?

To know that her favorite person in the world truly didn’t care about what she looked like… That for once, her beauty never mattered? That he’d never cared for it?

Again, it was so simple. Honestly it was basic human decency, but to know something like that after a life of being seen as a pretty object to oggle at, it was so, so refreshing.

But… Just as it was the first time her heart raced… It was one of the first times she was truly scared.

She was definetly panicked about it, and decided to not say a word of it to anyone. She didn’t want to ruin the friendship they had, after all he was her dearest friend. So she kept her mouth shut and continued on pretending like it was nothing.

She felt selfish having such feelings. She felt as if she didn’t deserve him, like he deserved better than her because she grew up thinking she must be unlovable. And so she kept quiet for the sake of him, too. She thought it was best for the both of them. (<- LIARRRRR!!!!!!)

Kyra had thought she did a good job at keeping everyone at arm’s length— but when she turned around she found herself in his arms instead.

She spent her entire life building up walls that were taller than her, to hide her true self from everyone else. To hide how she really feels. But, Floyd went and teared down all of those well-built walls without her even realizing it.

She never expected someone to ever be able to see her as something more than her appearance. She never thought anyone could look past the surface everyone saw as “her”. But…

Floyd… He made her feel… Normal. He made her feel human. He didn’t seem to care much about how she looked at all and that… Made her really, really happy. But still, even then. He still deserved better.

He deserved more than someone as empty as her.

So, she pretended those feelings didn’t exist. Or, atleast she tried to…

She was honestly a mess. Usually she was so comfortable doing the things they always do together. Holding hands, kissing eachother’s faces, cuddling— but now that she knows how she really feels ??? Oh, shes struggling so SO hard to keep her cool.

Shes always been good at hiding her emotions. But shes never been in love before, and its all so new to her that she doesnt know how to handle it.

In a way its somewhat overwhelming. Although she does a rather good job at keeping her inner turmoil hidden, shes still freaking out internally.

Shes still able to keep up their whole dynamic, its just now, its a little harder. Since now she had to fight back the blush that threatens to stain her skin. How embarrassing…

(She totally giggles and kicks her feet about him once shes alone btw LMFAOOO) (then immediately feels guilty after HELP)

Floyd realized a little later, it kind of just hit him one day. They weren’t doing anything in particular, he just looked at her and went “Oh. Ohhh.”

Like a lightbulb went off in his head. He didn’t say anything about it either for awhile. Eels are cowards, after all. And he didn’t know if she felt the same. So he just decided to act like nothing happened, continued this routine of theirs that they’ve grown attatched to.

Maybe there were afew times where they wanted to say something about it, to finally admit the unspoken thoughts they’ve had kept in the back of their minds… But they never go through with it. Always backing out last minute, brushing it off.

The two were cowards, dancing around their mutual feelings. Unsure of how the other felt, so they decided to just leave it all unsaid. Even if the look in their eyes said otherwise.

Saying they were just “best friends” was just so much easier. It was what they were used to, what they were comfortable with. It was easier to brush it all off as them being comfortable eachother, sharing beds and exchanging gentle touches. It was all platonic, of course!

…Though Floyd was hesitant with his own feelings. He never expected to find someone that captured his interest so much… Yet he wondered, was he ready to commit?

Strangely, there was no doubt in his mind. It was yes, it always was, yes. The moment he asked himself that question he answered it immediately at the same time.

Of course, because he realized if it was Kyra, there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do. Man, when did he get so whipped for such a silly shrimpy?

Merfolk only choose one mate for life. And Floyd is sure he wanted his to be Kyra.

He was scared of course after realizing his own feelings. Besides Azul and Jade, he's never let anyone get this close to him. It was strange letting Kyra in like this. He didn't plan on her, not at first at least. but now that he has her, he wants to keep her forever.

Man, she just kept surprising him, huh? He never even thought he could feel so deeply for someone. But hes so glad that he found her, that they found eachother.

Difficulties…

When Kyra left with Epel, Rook and Elena during Book 6, Floyd was upset.

Thats an understatement, really. He was furstrated, worried, and somehow he even felt betrayed.

Why didn’t she tell him? Why didn’t she take him with her? Doesn’t she know its dangerous?

He knows Kyra can take care of herself, he knows shes capable and he knows she can defend herself. But that doesn’t stop him from worrying.

Throughout the span that shes gone Floyd is restless. Hes snappier, hes moodier and he cant seem to stop pacing around no matter how hard he tries.

But when Kyra gets back— he completely ignores her.

Kyra was so very confused. Actually, everyone was. This was a first for the two of them. Honestly, Kyra expected him to run towards her just like he always does. But he doesn’t.

Kyra is back, but that doesn’t change his mood. If anything, it worsens. And Kyra doesn’t have a clue why! Everytime she tries to approach him, he just turns his heel and walks away. And hes never looked at her like… that..

Kyra is a total mess. And suddenly shes not as good as keeping her real feelings at bay like she usually is. She wondered if she did something wrong? Said something wrong? Was he finally sick of her? And that was when she realized— she was terrified of the thought of losing him.

In desperation she went to Jade. Maybe she should’ve asked Elena for advice instead, but before she knew it she was sat infront of Jade, asking for help with his brother.

If anything, Jade seemed amused with her situation. Of course he did. But with a mischevious twinkle in his eye, she had a feeling he had a scheme brewing up in his head.

Maybe she should’ve known better than to trust Jade… But she didn’t really have a choice, or so she thought as much.

Something about this situation felt so… Deliberate. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it, but it seemed like he knew she’d come to him for help sooner or later.

After giving Kyra some advice and words of encouragement, he did something rather out of character of him. Bringing into a hug, he held her rather close to himself.

Kyra didn’t really notice this, and accepted the hug with no hesitation. Wrapping her arms around him and sighing as she melted into the well-needed hug.

Little did she know, Jade’s eyes were glued onto his brother’s figure, looming by the doorframe with a scowl on his face. It made Jade chuckle, deciding to tighten her arms around Kyra juust a little more to see what he’d do.

Of course, Floyd wasn’t happy about it. Now, Floyd is not a jealous person by any means. He has better things to focus on, other things to keep him entertained. But at moments like these, when hes already in a bad mood, he can’t help that primal instict, its in his blood after all. A moray is a moray.

Tearing her away from Jade, he drags her to somewhere else. Leaving a very amused Jade watching them leave.

And so, an argument occurs !!! Its a back and forth, Floyd mad about what he just saw, Kyra trying to explain the situation then her getting mad at him back for avoiding her like the plague.

It ended up with Floyd admitting he was mad because she didn’t tell him about her going with them, but at the same time he was mad at himself for not being able to be with her then.

Kyra realizes that, yeah, she probably shouldve let him know she was going. But she couldn’t just brush off the fact he hurt her by doing what he did, shes grown enough as a person at this point to not let her own feelings go unheard.

Reconcilliation!!! They both apologize and promise to do better, and what better way to catch up on lost time than a sleepover??

Best believe that after they made up, they went back to their normal selves as if nothing happened— actually, maybe even worse with how much clingier they are. They seriously missed eachother, seeing how much they stuck together. 😭

“Home”?

When Kyra got news of the possibility of finding a way back to her home she was in shambles. So very conflicted between the place she called home and the place she felt was home.

She knew she had to leave some day. She knew this freedom she had was temporary. She knew one day, she’d have to go back to the life she grew to despise, the life that was never hers.

She didn’t want to leave, though. Of course she didn’t. But still, she didn’t really have a choice.

She decided she wouldn’t do the same mistake and leave Floyd out of the loop. If anyone deserves to know first, its probably him.

And so, while theyre sitting on the rooftop of Ramshackle she mentions it. And Floyd is… Upset. Of course he is. Hes beyond upset, really. He just got his best friend back, now hes hearing she might be going away again? For good? Forever?

No way. He couldnt accept that, there was no way he could. But before he could even say anything— Kyra spoke first.

“I don’t want to go back. I really, really don’t.”

“…You don’t? Huh? Why?” There was a wave of relief that crashed over Floyd when he heard those words fall from her lips, his eyes glued onto the girl beside him. Hanging onto every word she says. “No. Its just… Its not my home, atleast not anymore. I dont think it is.”

“I think, this is my home now.” She chuckles, eyes glued down to the ground below. “…Because you’re here.” She says, turning to look at him. She spoke in that tone that she only used behind closed doors. When no one was looking. That soft, sweet voice she used whenever she carded her fingers through his hair and whispered sweet nothings to him until he fell asleep. It wasn’t unauthetic like the voice she used when they first met— no, it was genuine. Real. Full of adoration, of fondness. Her gaze held so much love.

“…Hah, what’re you gettin’ all sappy for, Sea Angel? Thats so cringe.” He laughed, but his heart soared. Even if it was cheesey, he couldnt help but swoon with just the way she looked at him. Like he was the most beautiful thing in the world. She always said he was the prettiest boy in the world.

She moved forward, her face leaning ever so close to his, so close he could see every line and curve of her features. He laughed at first, “Hey, what’cha tryna do, huh? What? Do I have somethin’ on my face?” He joked, but she didn’t respond. It looked like she was thinking, like she was deep in thought. “…Kyra?”

Her name left his lips for what was the first time. Hanging in the air like a silent prayer of longing, of want. And her own lips met his. Capturing it in a sweet, sudden kiss.

Time seemed to have stopped. It always felt like that when they were together, but this was different. Nothing could prepare him for that— hell, he didn’t even get the chance to kiss her back, the moment felt as if it went on forever but it was over too quickly all the same.

There was a flash of realization on Kyra’s face as her cheeks flushed a red that could rival Riddle on a rampage. Stumbling and stuttering, she couldn’t handle the embarrassment, and before he could even say anything she ran away. Leaving him on the rooftop, wide eyes and a stomach full of butterflies.

Yeah. Kyra is really stupid sometimes.

After that whole thing, she ran to Leona to let out her thoughts. He listened, though he said he ‘didn’t have a choice anyway’.

“So… You kissed him then you just.. Ran? Seriously?” “I PANICKED!!!”

Floyd and Kyra don’t really interact until Malleus’ overblot. And during the time they’re in Floyd’s dream, shes hoping he doesn’t bring up what happened at the rooftop.

Choose.

Okay soo, lets say that they really do find a way to send Kyra back home !!! Not just a possibility anymore, its there and now she actually has to choose.

Of course, the decision was already made a long time ago. She knew from the very beginning she’d have to go home, but she doesn’t want to. Not at all.

Floyd is the most upset about this, to no ones surprise. Is she seriously just going to get up and leave? Just like that?

All of those moments together, all of those times they shared… Did it mean nothing to her? At all?

“I’ll always be right by your side!” Liar. If that were true, she wouldn’t be leaving.

“I’ve never met anyone like you, you’re the best person ever!” Then why are you choosing to leave?

“You can always count on me, alright? I’ll be here for ya, no matter when or where.” —Liar. “Its okay, let it all out. Im here for you.” Liar.

“Mm, after we graduate… Wouldn’t it be fun to live together? Haha, I just couldn’t imagine a day without you in it.” Liar.

“I love you, Floydie!” Liar. Liar liar liar liar.

All those times, everything she’s ever said that stuck to him like glue, it all came rushing back to him. Yet instead of the warmth and fondness it usually brought to his heart, it instead felt cold. It felt like betrayal, cold and cruel.

How could she do that? Say all those things then just leave like it all meant nothing? How could she leave like they didn’t share all those memories together? As if they never held eachother through the cold nights and whispered sweet nothings? Giggled like little kids while peppering kisses on eachother’s faces, ditching classes to go have a day out in town— kissing on the rooftop?

How could she leave just like that? Like it all meant nothing. Like he meant nothing, to her?

To say he was angry was an understatement. He was that and more, a raging storm of emotions, and Floyd has never been one to control them the best.

Unlike what happened after Book 6, this time Floyd confronts her directly. It ends up as an argument, Floyd not understanding why shes choosing to leave Twisted Wonderland if she doesn’t actually want to, and Kyra not wanting to “bother” Floyd with how she truly feels.

Kyra keeps her reasons secret, mostly. Just as she does with the rest of who she is. She wants to tell him, she really does. She hates having to keep things from him but she thinks its for the best.

She just wants the best for him, and she thinks that her leaving will be better for him. So she won’t be a bother anymore, so he wouldn’t have to worry about her anymore.

While Floyd doesn’t understand why Kyra is choosing to leave, Kyra doesn’t understand why Floyd is so upset about her leaving.

Why is he so persistent? This is for the better. They’ve had good times and god, will she miss it all dearly. Not just miss it, but yearn to relive their time together again, and again, and again.

Kyra doesn’t truly understand how much she actually means to Floyd. Its never even been a possibility to her that he could ever love her more than a friend.

And so, they have another argument. And unlike the last one, it doesn’t end as well. They end off on a rather bad note, Floyd saying something that he really shouldn’t have and leaving Kyra all by herself.

She didn’t cry, but god did she want to.

But yet, part of her still was hoping that… That he’d ask her to stay.

…Cue ink dripping cutscene here!!

Overblot.

…Yeah. Kyra overblots… (and Floyd is one of the direct reasons why LMAO)

How does Kyra overblot despite having no magic???????? Uhhhhhhh, idk plot !!!! Plot stuff !!! Plot armor !!!!!!! Something something absorbing magic from overblots n stuff blah blah blah ….

While I’m not exactly sure what happens during this, I know it happens right before shes meant to go back to her home world.

For context, I’ll try to summarize the reasons she overblots.

Kyra had never lived for herself. From the moment she was born, she was already assigned her role in life: To be the perfect princess for her people.

Only ever valued for her beauty and her status, she grew up thinking she wasn’t human simply because of how most treated her. They praised her yet their love was conditional, only ‘loving’ her when shes ‘perfect’. Only when shes ‘flawless’ like she should be. Which just meant to her that her true self must be unlovable.

She grew up lonely. Never let outside of the palace walls, she dreamed of a life of freedom she knew she would never have.

But, after waking up in Twisted Wonderland, that was exactly what she got. A life of freedom, where she began to discover her true self instead of the version of her that the public expected of her. Experiencing all of the things she never thought she would, and beginning to accept who she really is.

But of course, someone like her doesn’t deserve good things. Her birth is her biggest sin and she was meant to spend her entire life to try and repent for it. It didn’t matter how much she wanted something or how hard she fights for it— in the end, what she wants will never matter, because she doesn’t matter.

(Quote from Book 7 while talking to Malleus.)

Shes spent her whole life supressing her emotions. Building walls and hiding how she truly feels from everyone, regardless of how ‘close’ to her they are. Hiding how she feels, because she already feels like a burden with her being herself. Not wanting to bother anyone any further.

Kyra was healing. She was, she was getting better the longer she stayed in Twisted Wonderland— but all of that went down the drain once she got news of them finding a way for her to go ���home”.

Everyone has her limits, and as much as Kyra tries to convince herself this is all for the better, there was no part of her that truly wanted to leave. And all of the sudden, all of those surpressed emotions from years past, comes bubbling up to the surface and bursting at the seams.

She explodes, because she doesn’t want to leave.

She ends up hurting not only herself but others during her overblot, Floyd being one of them. The two ending up very injured after the incident.

(FUNFACT!!!! The Adeuce duo were the ones to snap Kyra out of her overblot :3)

Tearful Confession.

After her overblot, Floyd was heavily injured. But that still didn’t stop him from making his way to the infirmary room where Kyra was. He paid no mind to the objections of others trying to convince him to calm down and rest, because after seeing Kyra like that, how could he rest?

He knew Kyra. Atleast, thats what he thought. But he was starting to think he didn’t anymore, and that made him even more frustrated.

Frustrated that she didn’t tell him anything, again, and frustrated that he didn’t realize just how much she was suffering all by herself.

Floyd was never the kind to make other people’s issues his own, but it was different this time. That was his Sea Angel, right? His partner in crime and best friend… The one he was sure he loves. How could he ever call himself a good mate if he couldn’t even tell she struggling that much?

He was angry, upset, sad and so worried all at the same time. A mix of emotions all swirling together in his chest and beating in his head, but they all told him to do the same thing: Find her.

Plus… That argument they had before she overblotted… He had to make up for it.

It didn’t matter if he had to limp and stumble and struggle all the way there, he’d crawl through hell and back if it meant he could be there for her. A kind of devotion he didn’t think he was even capable of, but he couldn’t imagine a thing he wouldn’t do for her anymore. Especially when he knows she’d do the exact same for him and more.

And honestly, knowing she’d do the same and more for him was exactly why he had to be there. She was so foolishly selfless at times, always putting others before herself. But not this time. Not anymore.

Eventually he made his way to her room, where she was still unconcious. Laying in the infirmary bed, looking so peaceful. She was a mess, though. Messy hair and bandages running across her body, wrapping her skin in white cloth.

He stayed there, sitting right beside her and gently laying her head atop her chest. Listening to her heartbeat. The steady rhythmn soothed him, and he eventually calmed down, putting a hand over hers as he waited until she woke up.

And she did. Awhile later, she wakes up and hes very happy and gives her a hug— but then he remembers his concerns and switches back to how he was earlier.

Floyd begins to ramble about why she didn’t tell him anything and why she just let herself get that bad. Did she not trust him? Why did she keep so many secrets from him when it felt like they never hid anything from eachother?

Kyra was somewhat confused on why he seemed to care so much. Well, mostly because she never thought anyone would really care about how she felt, being so used to her own feelings being brushed aside and shrugged off.

And then, he says it.

“Damn it!— I love you! I love you, okay? I love you so damn much but you keep doing stupid things like this!”

That makes her freeze. What is he saying?

He… Loves her? Someone like her? Someone as unlovable as her? Surely, he must be lying. He must be joking. There was simply no way that someone as wonderful as him could ever love someone as worthless as her.

He was full of life, of unexpected thrills. He was everything beautiful in life. He was electric, fun and adventurous. He was full of emotion and genuinity. Her? She was empty. A shell of someone that once was, a broken thing trying to learn to be alive too late. How could he love someone as unlovable as her? Someone who doubts her own humanity?

The words were so simple yet they held so much meaning. The way he was looking at her and holding her shoulders the mix of emotions in his eyes… She knew he wasn’t lying. After all, he was never the kind to lie about something like this.

And… She cries. For the first time, she breaks infront of him. Tears rolling down her cheeks like raindrops on a car window on a rainy day, she was trembling.

She shook her head, tried to deny it. She tried to convince him she wasn’t worth it. She wasn’t worthy of his love. She wasn’t worthy of the friendships shes made here in Twisted Wonderland, she wasn’t worthy of any of the good things shes received so selfishly.

She wasn’t good enough for him. How could he love someone like her? It didn’t make sense. None of it did. Atleast not to her.

Floyd couldn’t believe what he was hearing. If anything, he was almost speechless. But seeing her crumble like this right infront of him… Seeing the tears roll down her face and hearing the words coming out of her mouth… He was angry. Not at her, but to whoever made her feel like this.

To the ones who made her feel less than human.

He pulled her into a tight hug, “Thats not true. None of that is true. Stop it, just… Stop.” His grip on her was tight, and she realizes hes trembling just as much as her.

He could’ve lost her. That overblot was no joke, and seeing her like that… Oh, god… How could he say he loved her even after seeing her like that? After seeing her like this?

She was a mess. Teary eyes and snotty nosed, messy hair and wrapped in bandages, covered in wounds— both literally and figuratively.

He’s seen it all. Her real self, the one she was sure was unlovable. All of her ugly sides and now her darkest moment. The ugliest of all. She wants to push him away, she wants to beg him to leave, she doesn’t feel worthy of any of this, he was too good for her but…

She wanted to be selfish. She wanted to be selfish when it came to him, and she hated herself for it. No matter how much she told him to leave, his hold on her loosened, and he didn’t say a word.

After she settles down in his arms for awhile, he moves to look at her, a hand cupping her cheek and making her look at him properly.

The tears never stopped, he wondered just how long she’s been hurting like this and never told anyone. Never told him.

And… Slowly, he began to kiss away all her tears. Kyra froze, feeling his lips on her skin, gently kissing away all of the tears that fell from her eyes. Each touch filled with so much love and tenderness, it made her cry more, tears of happiness. How could he be this loving to her? It didn’t make sense. She didn’t understand.

“I love you,” he began to say over and over with each kiss. “S-stop…” Krya said inbetween sobs, but yet she didnt even struggle. If anything, she melted even more into his touch. She needed this… She needed him.

“I love how competetive ya are,” he just kept going. “Love how you look when you see somethin’ ya like.” And going, “I love seeing that stupid grin on your face when we’re about to go do somethin’ stupid,” and going.

He began to list off all the reasons he loved her, and…

“I love you, Kyra.” And she knew he meant it. She knew he meant everything he said, knew that he was being genuine and honest with her. No matter who you were, no one could replicate the way he looked at her at that moment, there was simply no way to feign emotions like that. She could feel all of the love pouring out of his words, his touch. And she knew, he loved her for her.

“How could you love someone like me…?” She sobbed out inbetween, her voice so meek and tiny. Shaky. Unlike her usual tone. “How could I not?” Was all he said. He said it so matter of factly, he couldn’t imagine not loving her.

By the end of it, Kyra was too speechless to respond with anything but… “I love you too.”

Finally giving in, Kyra hugged him back tightly, and before they knew it they were sharing a sweet kiss. Melting into eachother’s arms, and spending the entire day there, together.

And OHHH MYYY GOD FINALLY TBH. DAMN THE SLOWBURN WAS BURNINGG WITH THIS ONE !!!!!!!

“But, no more secrets, got it?” Floyd huffed, pinching Kyra’s cheek. “G-got it…” Kyra chuckled.

Kyra couldn’t help but wonder… How did she get so lucky?

“Its About Time!”

After Kyra’s choice of staying in Twisted Wonderland is confirmed, it was actually Professor Crewel and Paige that adopted her and sorted out all of her paperwork. So, now she had legal guardians, all of the needed paperwork, and basically everything she needed to stay in Twisted Wonderland without any issues.

AND Kyra and Floyd were officially in a relationship now!!!! YIPPEEEEE!!!!

Kyra is much happier now. And while theres still a twinge of guilt for not returning back to her home world, she was relieved that she was staying in her real home. Where she can truly be herself, surrounded by people who truly love her.

Kyra is still healing and trying to get better, and Floyd is right there as her biggest supporter.

Shes learning to be more open and honest about how she truly feels. And slowly but surely, she gets there.

Unapologetically showing and voicing how she really feels, and she even stopped surpressing her own moodswings.

Being with Floyd as lovers instead of just ‘best friends’ was honestly the best thing for her. Of course, there wasn’t much that actually changed between their dynamic, but still. Knowing someone like him truly loved and supported her made her unbelivably happy and hopeful.

…Though, for others, they somehow got even more annoying. And I say that with all the love in my heart LMAOO

Both Floyd and Kyra like to brag about eachother, and they somehow got even more clingy to eachother after getting to a relationship.

Seriously, its baaad 😭 do not seperate them or one of them will be biting people (/j)

Being together has allowed both of them to be completely vulnerable around someone. Although its new to the both of them… Its honestly refreshing. Its a good thing for both of them.

They make eachother better. (And worse.)

Funfacts!

Floyd was kind of scared of Kyra for a little while LMAOO 😭 shes a little TOO freaky …

Floyd has stayed over at Ramshackle so much that he’s has a bunch of stuff over there. An extra toothbrush, some changes of clothes, you name it. Its probably there. You can bet Floyd just lets himself into Ramshackle all the time, sometimes even in the middle of the night. But Kyra is always so chill about it 😭 (only because its Floyd HEHE)

Before they even started dating— behind closed doors they already acted like an old married couple 😭

Kyra and Floyd are lowkey super domestic behind closed doors, especially after a sleepover. Waking the other up with kisses ….. Helping eachother get ready for the day, helping eachother get dressed … Cooking together …….. theyre so sickening …………

Even if they aren’t with eachother all the time, they still manage to include eachother in their lives somehow. Whenever they go off on a solo-adventure, they always come back with some sort of trinket that reminded them of the other.

Speaking of, they’re both avid collectors of anything they deem cool enough. Random rocks, acorns, a lost penny, you name it. They like to show eachother the things they found throughout the day to eachother!

They have this silly little game Kyra started. She began hiding little sticky notes with sweet messages or a doodle and sometimes gifts in places she knows Floyd will find, and he’s started doing the same thing. Ever since then, its kind of become more like a competition on who can find the most sticky notes 😭

Kyra gets cuteness aggression from Floyd. Yeah thats it.

^^ she genuinely believes hes the cutest thing ever. Whatever u say queen!!!!

Floyd loves giving Kyra random gifts out of nowhere. The gifts can range from ‘a cool rock’ to a designer jacket. Kyra doesnt know which she prefers HAHAHA

Kyra herself prefers handmade gifts, so she loves to make Floyd pieces of jewelry and clothing! Shes always so proud whenever she sees him wearing something she made :3

Floyd and Kyra have been kicked out of class several times for laughing too hard.

They admitted to eachother before they even started dating that they couldn’t imagine their life without the other… can they pls take the hint omg

Floyd always feels super bad whenever he loses control of his temper around Kyra. One time he snapped at her, and he immediately apologized 😭 he told her to slap him if he ever did that again, hugged her so tight too and Kyra honestly found it so cute 😭

Floyd always perks up whenever he realizes Kyra is close by, always running straight to her. Kyra does the same thing and quite literally jumps into his arms.

Both Kyra and Floyd’s main love language is physical touch!! But Kyra loves to compliment him all the time, and Floyd loves gift giving :3

Kyra always greets Floyd with a kiss on the cheek. Yeah she started doing this before they were event dating im afraid ….

Kyra and Floyd love to read together at night, though Kyra usually falls asleep first AHAHAHA

But !! Kyra is also the first to wake up more often than not, and always wakes Floyd up with butterfly kisses on his face :3

Floyd convinced Azul to add some of Kyra’s favorite foods to the menu of Mostro Lounge just to get her to come visit more often

Kyra fights anyone that bad-mouths Floyd. Floyd doesnt know whether to find it cute or annoyed that she keeps getting herself hurt 😭

^^ SPEAKING OF, Kyra literally unlocked a much more caring side of Floyd with her being so accident-prone 😭 girlie got herself injured so much FLOYD had to step in smh …

Floyd is the kinda guy to carry Kyra if her feet started to hurt while walking or if she sprains an ankle teehee

They’re both banned from an arcade in town after they broke a claw machine and stole all the plushies inside. And other things but that isnt as important.

When Floyd feels like hanging out with her, he’ll look for her around campus then just throw her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes then just walks away. Kyra never struggles or objects and kind of just … accepts her fate 😭

Rambling…

Kyra grew up thinking the love she received will always be conditional. That she always needed to live up to some sort of expectation, and so she created a ‘perfect’ persona in order to do just that.

She still keeps that persona from the Prologue to Book 1, but begins to break away from it during Book 2– but while in her past she was only loved for the version of herself she created for others— it was the opposite with Floyd.

He disliked her so-called ‘persona’, but fell so deeply in love with her real self.

^^ she was very confused, yet so very happy.

Floyd thinks everything is fun as long as Kyra is with him <3

Kyra only ever started showing her more vulnerable side to Floyd during her character development. He was the very first to ever see her break away from the unbothered act she always put on.

Floyd was never one to let himself be so soft and vulnerable around anyone, ever. But strangely, he lets his guard down around Kyra. Kyra knows of the much gentler side to him, and she adores it so very much.

Kyra is extremely understanding and patient of Floyd and his mood swings. She knows he’d never intentionally hurt her, and always knows just how to cheer him up. Whether with a silly joke, a spontaneous adventure or just lying in bed with him in her arms.

Kyra trusts Floyd with her LIFE. She trusts him so much its ridiculous. No matter what the situation, she always feels like she can rely on him… But she wont trust him with her food. Or her plushies.

Extra: Incorrect Quotes (?)

I have more on my 🎀! twst shennanigans tag lol

[antisocialsharky]

ASPD Affects More Than Just Behavior

I spent some time in the disorder related subreddits (big mistake, I know) and stumbled upon the following comment:

"ASPD shouldn't be a personality disorder diagnosis, its just bad behavior and has nothing to do with personality"

Lets get into why that is absolute bullshit, shall we?

1. ASPD is more than just behavior. While no diagnostic mannual is able to describe the whole range of experiences that fall under a diagnostic label, even the DSM-5, with its very behavior heavy criteria, manages it to get that point across. You'll find mentions of a "lack of remorse", "irritability & aggressiveness" and "disregard for the safety of self or others" in the main criteria.

The "associated features supporting diagnosis" section, mentions the following additional traits, that could be seen as not strictly behavioral in nature: lack of empathy, inflated & arrogant self appraisal, glib/superficial charm, inability to tolerate boredom and depressed mood.

The proposed alternative ASPD criteria (that is not used for diagnosis, but is used to understand the condition) describes these traits: egocentrism, absence of prosocial inner standards, lack of remorse, lack of concern for others, incapacity for mutually intimate relationships, callousness, persistent/frequent angry feelings, boredom proneness, lack of concern for ones limitations, denial of the reality of personal danger and lack of respect for promises & aggreements.

All of those traits are not strictly behavioral, but have something to do with ones emotional state and thought patterns. Its the basis, that provokes and influences behavior sure, but claiming that ASPD is nothing beyond that behavior is ridiculous.

2. The definition of a personality seems to be along the lines of being "a characteristic way of thinking, feeling and behaving" or "any person's collection of interrelated behavioral, cognitive, and emotional patterns that comprise a person’s unique adjustment to life". Everyone will have their personal definition, but this does overlap with how the DSM-5 defines a personality and thus defines the areas in which a personality is seen as disordered (whether you are a fan of that concept or not).

As mentioned above, theres a lot of evidence in the criteria that ASPD is not just comprised of "disordered behavior", but also "disordered emotions" and "disordered thought patterns". Or, if you prefer to think of it this way, you could say that ASPD affects all three areas in a way that disables the individual.

Now, a very interesting part of the personality definition is the "unique adjustment to life" part and that brings me to my next point.

3. A personality disorder is caused by a mix of different factors, but most often includes a genetic and an environmental factor. This environmental factor usually has something to do with trauma and/or adjusting to a difficult life situation.

And oh damn would you look at that...its almost as if ASPD, as a personality disorder, is a unique way of adjusting to that difficult life situation, which totally overlaps with the definition of a personality. Shocker...

All sillyness aside, ASPD is a deeply ingrained pattern that forms as a way of surviving & being able to deal with what life throws at you. Its not superficial, its not just behavior. It influences everything. You can think of it as a liquid, that seeps into the smallest crevices of your brain and sticks to the walls and refuses to leave again.

The fact that ASPD is so often singled out, as being "just bad behavior" is no mistake of course. Its due to stigma and the way in which people view antisocial traits as bad & undesirable (tho the same could be said for all other PDs in one way or another). It proves yet again, how little some people know about the subject and how much more awareness is needed.

Some part of the blame, probably lies with the behavioral focus in the DSM-5 main criteria, which is often the only one people learn about! Many do not bother looking beyond and learning about the condition from the people who have it, or explore what it simply is in the end: an adjustment of personality that just made sense/was essential and cannot be entirely reversed again (and the argument could be made, that it shouldn't have to be reversed).

Let me quickly dive into some personal examples at the end, to make the whole thing a bit more graspable:

• ASPD is more than just behavior, because if I see someone cry because they hurt themselves, I cannot feel with them and I do not feel any desire to help them. I will think about them as weak and annoying, I will secretly hope that they just stop so I don't have to deal with it and I will have to work hard to keep the annoyance that I feel off my face. The behavioral part will be what I do about it. Do I get up, turn around and walk away? Or do I sit down and comfort them and try to help, even if it entirely goes against any emotion I feel & any thoughts I have?

• ASPD is more than just behavior, because if someone just so happens to bump into me in public, I will feel anger. I will be furious, curse words will run trough my head and my brain will play trough multiple scenarios of revenge and reactions that would be satisfying to me. I will think every negative thing under the sun, I will feel every bit of rage, disdain and annoyance. But the behavioral part is what I do about it. Do I let my aggression out and make that persons day as miserable as they just made mine? Or do I wave it off, smile and go on, even if everything inside me wants to claw its way trough their face?

first posted on my instagram (same @)

[lokorum]

what would you say is your favorite jonmichael fic..... im very curious and love to reread anything in that tag

oh but how can i pick only one when they all are so good??? (,,•᷄‎ࡇ•᷅ ,,)?

aaaaaa can i make the several honorable mentions of the fics that made me scream and roll on the floor?????? pretty please???

scheherazade was one of the first jonmichael fics that i found while going through all of the cher's works because, evidently, they have no fics that are not worth reading!! (i'm sorry if and forty feet down only confirming it!!!)

sleep inertia has one of the best dialogues i ever read!!! the way cruelzy writes michael's lines??? aaaaaaaaa its so delicious and believable and never for a second i thought i'm reading something out of canon?? its just that good. 

carousel is the only one fic (from what i found) that i set in the last season and its adds a lot of layers to that big jonmichael onion that torments my eyes for a while now ldkfjgkdfjg also it's messy?? i mean the whole situation in the fic?? its so humanly complicated and it does not gives you the chance to experience any of the feelings clearly and i love it!! screechfox somehow captured all of the complicated stuff in one fic, blendered it together and for the whole time i just couldn't take my eyes away from it. 

five times michael saves jon's life and one time he doesn't have to - is here to sooth our pain and heal our wounds. i reread it so many times!! the dynamic between jon and michael in it is one to live for!!! sometimes you think 5+1 kind of fics can't surprise you anymore and then the coolest author like paisleycowboys enters the room and proves you wrong. 

to be like super honest, the 100 ways to say i love you series, when i first saw it, made me think im not gonna like it? i love my fanfics long and scary and bittersweet and with a bad-very-not-good-endings, so the title of this one made me go "hmmmmm HMMMMM hmmmmm hmmmm?" but ive started to read it anyway, theres not that many fics on the ao3 for jonmichael, we cant afford to be capricious and gosh GOSH i was so fucking wrong!!! its sweet AND sad AND scary AND awkward (in a best way!!!) AND it made me giggle so many times!!! NeedsCaffeineRightNow can make even the edgiest of us enjoy the soft kinds of fics (its not hard when they are written with so much care and love.)

POSSESSIVE!! MICHAEL!! COMBING!!! JON'S!! HAIR!!!!!! what else do we need from life?

transition, every time i reread it or think about it, makes me painfully aware of how many things should coincide for something to work. it's not one of those fics that completely encompass you; nor its the one that leaves you with new headcanons or in a good mood, no, i think it's the one that leaves you in dissoray, making you want to argue with author, to ask them what were they thinking about, pointing on your weak sides like this?, giving you something precious and then stealing it away? pushing your old bruises? that is to say, i have nothing but deep respect for indefensibleselfindulgence. to write fic that makes you want to engage in conversation? thats powerful 

Our 'Angel' of Static and Bone is written so inexplicably good, that more than once i wondered, how NeverwinterThistle was able to do it? and then i realised they are one of my fave bg3 and dishonored authors phpphp but really, the care, the effort that went into this fic? they are literally visible! you can feel the amount of time and brain juice that went into writing it. and the neighbor character? they appeared like two times?? and still their addition left me speechless with how clever it is, how different!! absolutely amazing work.

adjective noun has jonmichael chapter (11) that destroyed me as a person i swear i laughed so hard i dropped my phone and just kept giggling face-into-the-pillow style!!!!!! its rare for the fics to bring you this childish kind of pure joy; the little in-between moment of forgetting about everything, good and bad, and just have a good time. this chapter is definitely one of those rare things and it also made me wish there would be more jonmichael fics from cuttoth. somehow they nailed everything that should be nailed about this ship and did it in a couple of pages, what a magical work!! 

and well, now here's my fave fic, the one that took my head, shaked it like it's a soda can, and then left it open, fountaining at first and then dented and empty. 

I ask for nothing, but maybe I'm lying is the work that made me grateful for the fact that i know how to read in english. its....mmmm, you know that feeling when fic makes you go through literally everything? and then, as a bonus, through all stages of grief as well?

first you get hooked up by the beautiful writing style and so you know the fic is gonna be good and you get comfortable and you turn yourself off from the rest of the world and you read. 

you love pov, you love mood shifts, you love pacing, you love when scenes are short and you pause to think about what happened / you love when scenes are long and you get overloaded with the simple things that make you feel complicated emotions, you love it all. 

then you start to wish it would never finish; you look at the scrolling bar from time to time, a little bit too aware of how much there's left to read, a little bit too anxious about it. and at the same time, the fic starts to make you feel safe, confident, that at least it's gonna be alright, its gonna be that one work that will replace the canon events for you. it was the

“Oh. Oh, Archivist, no. That’s not right at all,” you say to yourself as you watch him march into artefact storage, both hands clamped around an axe. 

On a whim, you decide to save him."

line for me for sure uhhh it still hits as good as the first time too 

and then you get to the ending and you just stare at the screen. that hollowing feeling slowly spreading inside you. *sigh* its the best sort of inspiration im sure, but its the worse one too. i have no idea how possessedradios and authors like them are able to write something that kills you, then reanimates you and then makes you sit in front of the tablet drawing hours non stop. ''I ask for nothing, but maybe I'm lying" is so beautiful its scares and fascinates me, just like the podcast did. hell, better then the podcast did.  i know its silly but i even named my fisrt fanart of michael as the title of the fic 👉👈

ahhhh SO i rumbled again SORRY!!!!!!! every time someone asks something from me its either "i'll reply later" (replies 10 years after) or "tolstoy, hold my fucking beer". but i really hope that fic writers, not only those who are mentioned here but like in general? know how much they affect other people!! how their work creates safe spaces for others!! how they make readers smile or cry, even if those readers (im not pointing finger on myself idk what you talking about pgphpphph) are little gremlins that leaving comments once in a decade....................

have fun time reading!! <3

btw im working on a little fanart rn............. (expressing my deepest grattitude to ao3 johmichael writers 😳🔪)

[pencileraser1]

things i noticed/thoughts about most recent rewatches of dps (plus laserdisk deleted scenes):

whenever theres a group scene i've started watching the characters that the story isn't focusing on to see what they do and i've been having a fun time with that. pitts and cameron specifically seem to almost always be doing something interesting in the background.

hopkins!!!! my favorite minor character who somehow got character development despite having like 2 lines!!!! the last guy to stand on the desk but he did it!!!

sometimes i do like to think about what the rest of the students thought about the dead poets society, esp in alternate timeline neil lives dps keeps meeting universe. like yeah theres this guy in their class whose one of the most credited students in the school and we think he maybe started a cult. idk though. but that group runs out into the woods every few days to do god knows what and one of them keeps talking about "dead poets honor" whatever that means and holy shit welton star student neil perry started a cult.

i watched the movie with headphones. and maybe it's because ive seen this movie Far too many times and mabe i'm listening too hard but it was Really obvious sometimes when audio was added in post production. llke in the sweaty toothed madman scene when you can hear laughing and to be fair the camera is behind their heads. but it does Not look like anyone's laughing. my favorite is at the end of the phone call to chris scene where knox is like i'm gonna seize the day!! and runs up the stairs and the poets are cheering him on and neil is sort of yelling "carpe!!!!" and i could be wrong but i'm like 75% certain that the person singing is Also rsl so now neil is just speaking two times at once somehow. anyways it didn't ruin the experience for me or anything it was maybe just a little bit funny to notice but very sorry if this did ruin anyone's viewing.

people talk a lot about how rsl and ethan hawke really made their characters what they are but i have to add dylan kussman to that list. I get the impression that older versions of the movie didn't really give as much depth to cameron and watching dylan kussmans performance is like. he Knew who his character was so fucking well and it shows!! like the deleted scene of them getting clubs assigned. like i could tell So Much about cameron from that scene

for how little she actually appeared, there is an emphasis put on the fact that neil's mom smokes pretty frequently. and i think that's interesting considering neil is one of two poets shown actively smoking. neil's mom doesn't appear for very long in the movie but during that time it definitely seems like the movie is intentionally making parallels between the two, particularly in the last argument with neil's father. neil and his mother are both sitting for almost the whole time, which contrasts with his father who is standing. they are both almost powerless in this scene. they stand up at almost the same time. anyways there's a couple different possibilities for what this could mean? that i've though of? 1. to show that neil's mother is in a similar situation to the one neil is in in regards to neil's father and 2. maybe a stretch here but the theory that neil inherited his mental illness at least partially from his mother. i'm pretty sure 1 was fully intentional on the directors part, not entirely sure about 2 though

unmanned flying desket scene: it's probably cause he and ethan wrote the scene themselves but the way rsl talks in this scene feels more like the way he talks in general than the rest of the script. like briefly neil perry is talking in rsl's voice. one of my absolute favorite scenes though the sarcastic dialogue is so good.

the light of knowledge at the first shot of the film vs. todd standing on his desk at the last shot of the film paralel

[penelopesbaby]

"I’ll have a...."

Xanthus x reader

____________________________________________

The whole night had been an absolute blur. From killing off Xanthus' long lost traitor of an old friend to finding almost every alliance dead, including love who was in terrible condition. The trio, Xanthus, Dontis and love found their way back to the previously abandoned car in the middle of the woods next to the blood stained bayou.

Dontis sits in the driver seat while Xanthus sets love down in the back, sitting next to them to patch up the cuts and bruises given by audrick as a form of experimentation, test how strong the bond really was.

He was a sick man, a sad case of what tragedy can do to a person. And though Xanthus knew this, he could never feel remorse over his death. No matter how sad and "justified" his kidnapping and torture felt to audrick, Xanthus would not let him get away with the abuse he dealt to his love.

"Xanthus stop it that hurts." They whine, as he wipes a cut with the rubbing alcohol found in the first aid kit in the backseat.

"I know love but I need to patch you up, it will only take a few minutes, please be still." He replies grabbing the bandages.

In the front seat, dontis' mind is still trying to process the past few days for him, wondering if his hunter is safe, worrying for xanthus, and his lover who they only recently got back. It doesn't help that the couple in the back are yelling at each other over the pains of cleaning a wound.

He doesn't know what to do this time. For the first time, he has no words. Making a joke in a serious situation would only annoy the couple more, and words of encouragement would only fall on deaf ears. The only thing he can think of to make the situation better is... stopping for some food.

Its a perfect plan. Maybe not for xanthus, of course, but knowing his lover has had close to no food in their recent situation can only transfer the feeling of hunger and agitation to xanthus through the bond. Soothing love might fix things a little, at least he hopes.

"Xanthus stop touching me! I told you that shit stings-" "Well I need to disinfect your wounds! You've been covered in filth the past fews days what if you get-"

"Are you two hungry?" Dontis speaks above the bickering couple. "Theres uhh... a mcdonalds up ahead I think. [name] you haven't had much to eat, have you?"

The car falls quiet. Theres a moment of silence while love realizes how hungry they are before answering, "No, I haven't."

"Well let's fix that. I’m tired of listening to you two argue, so figure out what you'd like to eat." Dontis says while pulling into the drive thru.

"The line is quite long." Xanthus chimes in.

"I agree. I don’t feel like waiting and I’m sure your damsel doesn't either. Let's go inside." He responds.

Love looks around with confusion at the two unfazed men before making a statement they thought was obvious.

"We can't just go inside. I’m drenched in blood and sweat.. what if they kick us out?"

"It's McDonalds. I don't think anyone these days actually care. Especially not at 2:30 am." Xanthus responds and they only shake their head before getting out of the car.

Walking in and heading to the counter, they skim the menu to figure out what they're going to eat. Xanthus doesn't eat fast food. Or mostly any food for that matter, so he waits for love to tell him what they want while Dontis orders his food.

"Yes I’ll have a... Double quarter pounder with a large fry, a 20 piece mcnugget, 2 McCrispys and another large fry with a diet coke."

Xanthus and love glances at each other with wide eyes.

"Lord, Dontis!" Xanthus exclaimed. "Now that's really watching your figure."

"Gains can always come back but my McDonalds order can't, and I’m hungry!"

Xanthus scoffs, "Yeah yeah sure, what do you want love?"

They scan the menu one more time before answering.

"A 10 piece, medium fry and... a water."

"Will that be all?" The employee asks.

"Yes."

-----

"Fuckin weirdos man what the hell.." the employee thought before handing them their food and taking one more look at the blood stained clothes love was wearing.

"Guys.. We should probably eat in the car right..? Like to avoid staring." Love suggests.

"I don’t really care if people stare. But if you insist. It'll be better anyways, as I can continue patching you up." Xanthus replied before opening the door for them to walk out.

Dontis is already eating one of his orders of fries while they walk out, side eyeing Xanthus because he knows he's gonna hear more complaining about how bad the rubbing alcohol hurts from the backseat. At least the silence was nice for a while.

____________________________________________

I really love this idea! I think it was really cute, and I have an idea for an extended ending (please lmk if you wanna read it)

Tysm for reading!

-💋👠💄

[alicentsgf]

why are people so pressed about how Alicent ends up this season??? Like hotd hasn’t been good since s1 people also criticized everything back then but tbh Alicent from s1 was always headed to where she ends up?? I thought it was common knowledge that her last choice would always going to be duty vs love and s1 stated very well that Rhaenyra is that freedom for Alicent???? I absolutely hated the things they put Alicent through (alicole sex and for what? All of her sons being a dick to her??) her arc this season was badly executed but to blame and think that the writers are catering to rhaenicents? seems a bit stretch when the ship is hated by the majority of the show. We can argue in the journey of how Alicent get to the point she is now but it was clear for the beginning that the head of TG?? She would never be, sometimes I think that thanks to most of the general viewers didn’t understand Alicent as a character the writers thought if we put her in these humiliating scenes the viewers would understand that she is a victim of the patriarchy and the men who surround her, but I guess not even with that the GA and fandom as whole could ever understand her character and honestly im good with it, she’s a walking contradiction and i have read her character like that since the beginning, good riddance tho to the obnoxious people that kept bad talking Olivia for only doing her job (this is not a dig to you but the extended fandom that are attacking Olivia again for her character)

Why are we upset now? Because we dared to hope lmao. And now we're realising theres absolutely no coming back from this (it was already mostly ruined i know).

I think the issue is the choice between duty and love should have been made when she chose her children and grandchildren over viserys wish for rhaenyra to rule. Choosing love didnt have to and shouldnt have meant choosing rhaenyra. Like finally FINALLY she lets herself cast duty aside, because "what is duty against the feel of a newborn son in your arms", "you never love anything in the world the way you love your first child", "you imbecile (affectionate)", etc etc. That is what works in line with the original story AND the sympathetic sides of alicent we saw with in season 1. Sure motherhood shouldn't define women but this is a story abt a fucking lineage !! What do people expect. Of course its going to be about parents and children.

F&B might have been bare bones, but it at least had a strong political backbone to it thats been completely removed this season. That direction would have offered more oppertunities for alicent to be explored as a multifacted character. The problem is that because they angled this as a story primarily about misogyny rather than a story about the inevitability of the targaryen line imploding, they maybe thought they couldnt do that without making alicent look like an unsympathetic agent of patriarchy. (Most of the audience read her that way anyway so they did a pretty crappy job avoiding it). Rhaenyra represented a certain freedom for alicent in the story, sure, im not against that at all, but for the writers to suggest literally being with Rhaenyra is what alicent needs to do to achieve freedom from duty? To free herself from the shackles or patriarchy?? (🙄) Its so laughable. Alicents little grandson had to have his head sown back on for his funeral and Rhaenyras faction sent the assassin. Her daughter was traumatised. You dont just fucking come back from that. Really we should have known when viserys died how this was gonna go and I think in some ways we did because a big number of us were upset with the misunderstanding then, we just didnt want to believe what this signaled about where they were taking alicent. People are upset now because alicents character has become totally unrectifiable. We just never believed they'd diverge so much from the known plot points of fire and blood.

As for this bit you said:

" I think that thanks to most of the general viewers didn’t understand Alicent as a character the writers thought if we put her in these humiliating scenes the viewers would understand that she is a victim of the patriarchy and the men who surround her, but I guess not even with that the GA and fandom as whole could ever understand her character and honestly im good with it, she’s a walking contradiction and i have read her character like that since the beginning."

I have thought this myself and unfortunately I think you're right. In an effort to make alicent sympathetic they have created the most convoluted character i've ever laid my eyes on. Towards the end of season 1 we were already saying her being so forgiving after driftmark made no sense, but i was compelled enough by her because of olivias performance of that scene with the knife to be willing to wait to see where they took her this season. And its been an exercise in more of the same stupid shit. The issues in season 1 have just been amplified by the realisation that season 2 is just the same thing again and again and again for alicent. Shes just a punching bag and im sure thats in an attempt to get the audience to feel bad for her, because i cant see any other reason for it, but its just so badly written that shes no longer compelling or interesting or likeable really at all. Theres nothing to root for when you dont know who someone is. I have so little to say about her this season and that hurts honestly. Olivias performances deserved much better writing.

[bugeater77]

Nandermo things u probably forgot about

not in any order(i wrote them whenever i remembered them)

(scroll down for images, the ones pictured are highlighted) - Nandor holding guillermo up to make him feel like he is flying multiple times (quite possibly nandermo hug)

During the simon the devious episode where nandor once again takes him flying, they hold hands (last image)

Nandor telling guillermo to stay by his side until he falls asleep in the curse episode, then going to grab his hand but stopping (5th Image)

"you'll probably have to take it in the waist and out the shoulders" - guillermo knowing Nandor's exact measurements

Nandor getting so frustrated while talking about the other vampires wanting to kill Guillermo that he kicks and destroys a box

"take a picture of me having fun and then send it to guillermo so he knows how much I do not miss him" - nandor

Guillermo DROPPING EVERYTHING ON THE GROUND when he hears about nandor's engagement

"it's not gonna last." -Guillermo SHIT EATING GRIN after realizing that gale and nandor are not gonna be together

Guillermo PUTTING HIS ARM AROUND NANDOR AFTER THE GAIL EPISODE he thought he had a chance :( (4th image)

Sean calling Guillermo Nandor's boyfriend and lazlo not questioning it not one bit

pulling guillermo back way before he was supposed to after trying to use him as bait for the sire

this was also while he was shaking his money maker if i might add

like the second he did it...

entire scene where Nandor tries to convince guillermo to come back from celeste

ENTIRE HOMOEROTIC FIGHT SCENE

might i mention that nandor obviously thinks guillermo fighting him is hot??!

Guillermo gripping nandor plushie after he leaves (3rd image)

Guillermo has silver lined seatbelts in his car, meaning he was planning to rescue nandor for a while

"traveling the whole world with my nand- master" - guillermo

ermmmmmm glitter portrait ?!!

Nandor wishing to be human the SAME AMOUNT that guillermo wishes to be a vampire, seeing him as an equal

"my furry little friend" - nandor

Marwa, who likes EVERYTHING nandor likes, kissing guillermo all over his face

The wwdits cast interview about nandermo, which to me feels like a deep extreme very canonization

Nandor's pure jealousy after finding out about guillermo becoming a vampire

Him waiting for SO LONG outside of panera bread

Going to guillermos house to look at his baby pictures

talking about his goth phase with his mom...

"if i'm lying, kill me now" - nandor

Nandor being so upset and holding guillermos body after thinking he was dead

Nandor grasping guillermos sweater

speaking out against the baron to keep guillermo safe, which if you watch season 1 again you'll see that he is TERRIFIED of the baron

so excited to talk about guillermo killing vampires.... wtf is wrong with u nandor but we're not gonna get into that

"I will fix"

PUTS ON GUILLERMOS CAPE

he is so excited to kill derek, not to turn guillermo human, but literally just to kill derek out of jealousy

Nandor's face while guillermo is talking about his love life(second image)

Guillermos face after Nandor turns Gail into a vampire (first image)

guillermo hammering the door as hard as possible to wake nandor for his super slumber.

duh nandor knowing every part of Guillermos thank you card

The entire last episode actually?

theres absolutely more but this is all i remember just from my brain

(new additions) In another cast interview, Kayvan Novak says “I think he’s coming to the realization that his type is Harvey Guillén flavored.” about nandors type

Nandor makes guillermo spin around in his wedding cape

Nandor says he got the idea of having a wedding ever since him and guillermo "watched the wedding planner on that rainy sunday together"

ok listen closely, the wedding planner is about a woman planning a wedding falling in love with the groom causing him to leave the bride

he did NOT CARE WHO HE WAS MARRYING. BUT HE KNEW HE WANTED GUILLERMO TO PLAN IT FROM DAY 1

[tulipscomeinallsortsofcolors]

ok wait there is so much you mentioned there that im so interested in i hope you dont mind me doing a little ramble

1. fire poker drama with roman and dot. SO interesting actually, weve seen baby logan and dot talk about the scar but no one elses reactions to it i dont think so thats super cool, im also very interested in roman specifically reacting as opposed to virgil or patton who id imagine would be equally upset about logan being hurt (my first thought was roman having more baggage around someone you think loves you intentionally hurting you but also ill let you keep it secret too pslsjs) and also like. considering the roman/dot dynamic. very interesting good concept

2. logan and the terrible horrible no good very bad week - ALSO very cool this was one of my favourite lines in the original laoft story, i love logan immortality angst so much, especially when the people he loves are still alive (another thing i can imagine slightly fucking with you a little, watching your friend/brother/boyfriend/etc mourning you when you still have your full life ahead but knowing regardless that hes not really being unreasonable)

3. dot + larry realising logan cant lie. i just find all the raising a fae stuff really interesting, kind of like growing up disabled where like. as a parent you have to accept that you fundamentally have to treat your children differently because they have different needs whilst still maintaining the balance of raising them fairly. also the realisation of like "oh yeah one of our kids is a literal whole different species there is absolutely zero guidance on what were meant to do here"

4. virgil asking shelley to marry patton - first of all just very very cute second i think itd be so funny of shelley to know for ages that LMP are about to get proposed to and having to stay quiet about it (im also now wondering about whether you think like logan and roman would tell their own families theyre thinking of proposing thats interesting too)

5. patton and logan discussing roman the day after meeting him. also just a very cute and interesting idea and also i love any LMP as kids content pslsks

ok sorry theres me being autistic about laoft in your inbox ill leave you be now

you are so chill and valid i love this

i was thinking the poker drama would come about earlier in their friendship, before Romans really had time to warm back up to her, so he's especially irate

[chongmiz]

I heard I can fo it with a broken heart on the radio

And aside from the chorus being kinda awkward (I'm so depressed I act like it my birTHHHdaayyyyyYY)

I think this whole 'i sold you a lie you think I'm doing well but I'm not but I'm killing it so I'm a #girlboss try come for my job' is so embarassing

Because everything shes done over this last year I've thought 'theres a woman doing real bad'

Like I'm not trying to dispute the effort and energy that goes into touring like she does, but a lot of her decisions both professional and personally have made me think uh oh

Its giving 'could a depressed person do this?' But it's about dating the worst men on the planet and looking like shes going to cry on stage half the time

💌 come talk to me, a veteran swiftie in the anti- tag in the same way that martin luther still thought himself catholic

where i land with it lyrically is in conversation with four songs: "mirrorball" from folklore, "nothing new" from red TV, and two other ttpd tracks, "who's afraid of little old me" and "clara bow"

per the long pond sessions, she wrote "mirrorball" partially about COVID's effect on touring ("and they called off the circus, burned the disco down / when they sent home the horses and the rodeo clowns"). pair that with the much discussed WAOLOM asylum line and... it might be because she says "circus," it might be that while i have no personal experience of involuntary hospitalization i Do have basic empathy, but i think of the two great blond celebrity memoirs of the last few years: britney spears' the woman in me and jeannette mccurdy's i'm glad my mom died. which is all to say, she doesn't Have to do it with a broken heart! actually! "the asylum where they raised me" sounds like her pursuit of fame was coerced by say, a stage mom or an abusive contract or monetary need (it wasn't), if she was in an urgent health crisis like ICDIWABH suggests ("even when you wanna die"), she has all the power to postpone or cancel dates. she's not in a conservatorship, she's not being Made to tour; i can imagine feeling obligated to pay the hundreds of people it employs, but she is an actual billionaire, i think she can afford blue cross blue shield PPO plans for a militia. you can interpret "all the pieces of me shattered while the crowd was chanting 'more!'" as resenting the audience, but there's other performers in smaller venues with less freedom and power who need to be onstage to afford food. idk.

then there's the "try and come for my job:" extremely vague as to who is coming for it, and the popular reading is of other pop stars on tour. "clara bow" is my favorite track on ttpd by a long shot in part because it feels like a more mature version of "nothing new;" it's a little kinder to the ingenue and seems to respect her predecessors, recognize that She was the ingenue once, but it does not match up to her actual conduct in public. this is where i become very asian, but besides her being uhhh... pretty drunk at the grammys this year, i think her behavior is more a symptom of white american culture as egoistic and ahistorical—this is the kamala harris "you think you fell out of a coconut tree" meme, yes, but more broadly my complaint is filial piety. acting up in front of the likes of celine dion and tracy chapman and joni mitchell, especially on a night that celebrates all three of them, is absolutely unacceptable to me. they're your elders, they paved the path you're on (nothing new: "she'll know the way, and then she'll say she got the map from me"), but her teenage fans who've never heard any other music don't know or accept that she Isn't actually the progenitor of acclaimed women singer-songwriters

she wants to be seen as a "cool big sister" mentor to younger pop girls or boosting indie acts like boygenius, but afaik she herself hasn't shared the stage with an older female musician since alanis morrissette as a surprise guest on the 1989 tour. sure, she showed up to induct carole king to the rock 'n roll hall of fame, with a solo stage. but as much as people first cringed at luke combs' "fast car" cover, he acquitted himself with his grammy performance. there is true reverence there. if taylor brings stevie nicks (who wrote a poem?? for the ttpd physical editions) onstage at some point soon, i'll Maybe start to believe she doesn't see women over 40 as piles of dust she's either embarrassed to stand near Or, you know, who expose that she did not in fact fall out of a coconut tree, and have more stage presence sitting down than she does in sequins

[aslongasimhereyoureinvincible]

haikyuu!! the dumpster battle ramblings

saw it earlier today and am going to see it again tomorow with a friend, am very Full Of Thoughts, if u dont wont spoilers for the movie well take this as your warning ig

okay first of all the sound direction, the sound direction was INSANELY good

this is absolutely a movie that needs to be experienced in cinema, the soundscape of tokyo gymnasium and the karasuno v nekoma match felt so vividly real it was like i was at an actual game

the soundtrack was great too, i mean it always is w/ hayashi yuuki

there were i think two tracks that used the leitmotif from 'above', good shit

the animation was also really great, overall it didnt look massively better than season 4 of the anime

which is fine, season 4 looked great imo (minus that outsourced episode)

but holy shit when the sakuga hit it hit HARD

tsukki and lev blocking, kageyama doing his thing, kenma and kuroo's quick, there were lots of really great sakuga moments

they also reused some shots from earlier on in the anime and idk maybe thats 'lazy' or whatever but i liked it, it was very nostalgic :')

they did re-animate and i think re-voice hinata and kenma's first meeting tho, framing it from kenma's POV, loved that

i think my favourite sakuga shot had to be hinata and kenma with the knives at each other's throats tho, that ate

not sure how i didnt know about this before hand but it made perfect sense to me when i saw studio trigger in the end credits, some of the sakuga, esp the blocking, had a bit of that trigger flair to it

so obviously they werent gonna fit in everything from the manga, and the movie definitely had kenma as its focus, but i think overall they did a decent job in picking and chosing what to cut

the one thing im annoyed about is the removal of old coach ukai and coach nekomata's backstory, i really i think it makes the handshake at the end of the game hit that much harder

other than that tho i dont think the movie suffered from not adapting everything in the manga, i mean obviously i wouldve LIKED it, but i dont think the movie NEEDED it to be a good movie

it very much felt like kenma was the main character of the movie, and the main focus, with kuroo and hinata as his deuteragonists

which i liked!!! i think framing the match from kenma's POV for the most part makes sense, and its fun to spend more time in outsider POVs of karasuno

rlly loved the adaptation of kuroo and kenma's childhood flashback, im pretty sure kaji yuuki voiced kid kenma too

watching their friendship grow and seeing them play togther now as high schoolers, AUGH RIGHT IN THE FEELS

theres also a montage of kid kuroo barging into kenma's room to demand they go play volleyball together that ends on kuroo doing so whilst kenma's changing/putting on trousers which was rlly funny and silly

the stuff with kuroo and tsukki was so good too

'thanks to everyone, occasionally it's fun', 'thank god i wasnt wrong', 'he's a man who walks ahead of me'

AUUUGHHHHHH IT WAS SO GOOD :')

the scene that completely stole my breath away though was kageyama setting the open toss to hinata

i know ive already lost my mind over the whole 'threat of trust' thing and truly, the inarizaki match goes insane with that concept i will always adore it

but holy shit that scene smacked me over the head, HARD, with the concept of 'setting as a love language'

i just... i literally dont even have words for it it was SO amazingly good, i legitimately teared up in the cinema

speaking of other great scenes;

'stay interesting, 'kay?'

OHHHHH GODDDDDDDDDD

they did it perfectly

the music and the soundscape completely cutting out, the background whiting out so its just kenma and the net, kaji yuuki's delivery of the line

it genuinely felt like something out of a horror movie, it was creepy, and unsettling, and PERFECT

also;

hinata's reaction after kenma collapses and says 'that was fun'

murase ayumu's delivery was so VISCERAL, dude got in that booth and CHEERED

you really felt hinata's sheer utter come through in that little scene, same with kuroo's incredulous laugh

the end of the match was slightly a mixed bag for me

on the good hand;

having done from kenma's first person POV was cool, i dont think haikyuu's ever really done that before, and it looked awesome

cutting back on the music and background soundscaping so we just focus on kenma's breathing and the sound of the ball/players jumping/shoes squeaking etc was a great way to really immerse the viewer in the scene, and put us inside kenma's head

on the bad hand;

it was anticlimatic, and i KNOW the whole point of the end of the match is that its anticlimatic,

but i had always imagined the scene with dramatic swelling music and the characters running frantically, only for it to all cut away when the ball slips and all you can hear is kenma's 'ah-' and there'd be a close-up of his facial expression

the stage play did a very similar thing and it worked EXTREMELY well imo

instead by doing it in the first person POV and already not having music it just,,, didnt feel quite as impactful as it shouldve imo??

like the match points for the seijoh, shiratorizawa, or inarizaki matches were done really dramatically

and i know the whole point is that the nekoma match is kinda an outlier in that it ends in that anticlimatic way with the ball slipping, and theres that big beat with hinata calling out 'nice serve' to tanaka before the realisation sets in that theyve won, but jusstttt

idk like it certainly wasnt BAD, i still DEEPLY DEEPLY enjoyed it, but just personally if i'd been the director i wouldve done it differently

also!! because it was from his first person POV we didnt get to see kenma's face on the 'idiot! the ball hasn't dropped yet!!!' line, which was pretty disapointing ngl i rlly love that scene how it is in the manga

ok enough complaining tho back to the infinite list of stuff i loved about the movie

the camera work! good god the camera work was so fucking cool

it really made the space of the gymnasium feel 3d and real, the way the camera would move over and through the net with the ball helped emphasise the physicality of the players and the court

i know jack shit about cinematography but yeah, after the sound design the camera work was prolly the best thing

the post credits scene was great!! daishou trying and failing to neg kuroo cracks me up every damn time

and the set up for the kamomedai match was so hype

speaking of; the very vague forshadowing for hinata's fever of him having flushed cheeks and not being all exhausted after the game like the others, auughhh my heartttt

if he isnt already, this movie will make kenma one of your top 5 haikyuu characters

seriously i love how they switched the perspective and framing so it was a bit more like kenma was the 'main character' of this match and hinata was the 'rival'

overall the movie was cool, creative, and a really clearly loving adaptation, im more than happy to be paying to see it again tmr lol

i'll probably have even more to say after seeing it a 2nd time so tune in for that ig

[moth--moss]

Finally watching Grians video so I'm gonna summarize my thoughts for the hermits as it goes! This is gonna be a long one so all the summaries and thoughts below the cut :]

Ren: Absolutely love what he's doing with the Gigacorp stuff and the like, poisoned terrain and all??? Always a fan of ppl making stories and worldbuilding so we love to see it! I'm not watching Ren's pov but I've seen bits and pieces from other povs so its not completely new to me :] Ren's honestly just such a delightful person, love to see him stoppin by other ppls episodes!

Tango: One of my main povs this season, a surprise to nobody, absolutely love all the steampunk and his factory and everything he's got going on. Unsurprisingly he's found a new hole to live out of but who didn't see that one coming lmao. Tango rightfully has a place in my three-way tie for favourite hermit.

Cleo: this is my first time seeing their base this season! And damn what a shame its been this long cause I'm already really invested in the little story shes cookin up. The wizard tower is just,,,,, so cool??? I love the block palette for it! Not to mention all the armour stand work its so so cool, definitely gonna have to set aside time to watch their pov after this cause I desperately want to get the full story now! All of the spaces have character and feel very real with all the armour stand work and everything, definitely a master of her craft o7

Scar: So ive only seen Scars latest episodes and streams, i didnt watch anything before them, so it's like kiiiinda new? But also ive watched all of Grian's so ive seen most of this like, out the corner of my eye the whole time. Scar's builds always have so much story and character you love to see it, there's just so much soul and care behind his builds??? Ajcjdjacjs I got so scared seeing the creeper test tube thing empty I'm used to there bein a lil guy in there. The train is SO cool and scar is just So good at glass work??? The swaggon hat o7 emotionally i never left season 8. Scars one of my favourite hermits so i had a lot to say

Joe: another hermit i dont watch yet love dearly, hes just so much fun. Joe is just insane (/pos) and just so creative and imaginative in such a unique way, holy shit. I really need to watch more of his stuff cause the vibes are truly immaculate. Also as an aside this finally answers to me where Cubs labryinth is cause i had no idea until now lmao. That thing is MASSIVE btw. Joe Hills,,, just the whole scale of this whole thing is totally insane he deserves so much credit for this. I envy his dedication wowww.

Bdubs: Another hermit i dont watch but would love to, and who i see a lot of through other povs. Bdubs is like beyond any other builder in this game, hes like,,, a true artist, yhe way he uses blocks and everything is just ajdnfjwkdkw true art. Hes like painting, not building. Always absolutely blown away by everything he does in this silly block game. He wants to make ppl feel feelings and it DEFINITELY comes through. THERES WAS EVEN NYLIUM ON THE GROUND WHO DOES THAT! OHH and the FRAMING of it all?? The way this man thinks is just art on its own. I could look at bdubs builds forever i swear. Its phenominal. Note: keralis spotted in the storage cave <3 thats my guyyyyy. THE SILOS??? so so pretty. The way he uses thw bottom edge of the polished diorite to make those solid lines through it??? Aghhh its so cool. Blown away with how he makes depth on flat surfaces, its just insane. AND THE GRASS IS HAND PLACED? THE WATERFALLS??? Always lovely to see bdubs builds.

Cub: i know almost nothing abt what Cubs been up to except for the rockets, always lovely to see him showing up in other povs. Lovely to see him messing with sculk again, hes gone feral for it LMAO. All the sculk stuff is so interesting im probably gonna have to check out his videos also cause i am DESPERATE to know wth is going on with this because hes being so so cryptic with it. The rocket factory is just so cool? I love how much ppl can do now with the crafters.crqzy that he pulled the fireworks permit and decided to make it like a main part of his season. Just ALL IN with it. Respectable.

Etho: etho!!! Another of my main povs this season actually, which is new for me cause last time i tried to watch his season he made the shulker storage thing and it broke my brain and i couldnt understand anything. (This time it made sense though). I really love ethos base this season, even if his roof was still unfinished at this point in time lmao. I love his little pond and garden and balcony and all that. Also its not here yet in the tour but i LOVE the lighting work he did around the mailbox its SO good. Also obligqtory frogger is awesome. When the server download goes up at the end of the season there are gonna be SO many games to play o7

Impulse: impy!! We love him so much. Dont watch his episodes but love to see him around :] did not know his city was gonna be a game?? Thats so cool?? The citys already so cool and im so excited to see it finished cause its already looking lovely and i can tell its gonna be really cool all together :] love the lore and all around the city too!

Zedaph: a hermit i watched quite a bit of last season but nothing yet this one, lovely guy always a fun time :] no surprise at all to see hes doing something else fun and silly this season. This really is a season of minigames! This guy is absolutely wild and just so much fun

Pearl: another i havent been watching, to my own sadness as pearl is one of my personal favourite builders on the server! Her whole solarpunk aesthetic this season is just DELIGHTFUL. Another hermit ive been meaning to watch for a while now cause i just love how she does like,,,, everything? I love Pearl builds just so so much. Absolutely love the sunflowers in the floor of her storage (my favourite flower) and all the yellows just in general its just such a bright build and so so lovely. Theres so much character and all the build flows together so so nicely. Also her dye qnd flower shop??? SO nice with all the layering qnd the glass roofs and just how open and fresh it all feelsand qjdjfjsjdsj i just love how pearl builds so much she is KILLING IT this season

Doc: so im currently watching through docs pov and i kiiiinda dont want to be spoiled on any big projects and crazy farms hes planning, so im actually skipping his segment of the tour. Though i will still say doc is absolutely insane and i love all the crazy game breaking stuff he does, i just want to see it all as it happens :] if i do catch up eventually i may circle back to the tour episode later but for now no spoilers!

Skizz: what a delight! Havent seen his episodes but we love skizz so much, such a big heart on that guy and so glad hes here. Love him and all his gift hoarding and hes just so iconic. His big pyramid is all a big psychology metaphor and stuff and thats,, very very cool i didn't know that! Truly a season of minigames i love it!

Mumbo: ive watched some of the early stuff for his season but i had a solid like 6 months where i wasnt really into anything like at all, so i stopped watching after some of the early stuff, though i do plan to get back to his videos sometime because i love what hes doing this season! (Oh noo some of the stuff id written got deleted so i gotta try to rephrase) mumbos been getting so good at building lately and it really does show with his work this season! I absolutely love all his work with the concept art and everything, its my favourite kind of excessive and "unnecessary" worldbuilding that makes a project feel that much more alive.

Joel: I've seen joels first few episodes but dont really watch him much. Hes absolutely incredible in just how much detail he shoves into every little space. His whole base this season just feels so real and its all so intentional and well planned and thought out. His build feels almost like its just been torn out of a real city and dropped straight into minecraft, theres just so much characters and attention to his builds. Just a place i would love to visit and explore. One thing: i mean this in the best way, but his little songs give me the WORST second hand embarrassment its so hard to listen to LMAO thats most of why i have a hard time watching his videos. Hes so cringe and i absolutely LOVE it. Never change, joel

Keralis: remember what i said about my three way tie of favourite hermit?? Keralis firmly holds a place right up there <3 another of my favourite builders and always holding just the most DELIGHTFUL vibes and just the sweetest face on the whole server. Embarrassingly i am... not fully caught up on his episodes, ive only seen up to episode 10. In my defence i only came back to hermitcraft in the last few months so i have a lot to catch up on! Though unlike with doc i have no qualms about spoiling myself because its not like lovely builds from keralis are anything other than my expectations :] Ive only just started his part of the tour but i know im gonna be smiling the whole way through <3 absolutely beautiful base i want to go here for vacation asap and never leave, beautiful trees and booshes and all the little huts, i love it all so so much. Also i would absolutely love a tour where keralis shows every single tree individually you dont even understand i would happily sit there and watch the entire thing <3 keralis why are you so hard to come up with a good design for i swear ill find one eventually hes just such a bug to me. I just want to sit along the side of one of the paths with a nice tropical drink its just so so lovely. If yall let me talk about keralis i will NOT be shutting up any time soon, if this mini essay is anything to go by. While on the topic id like to also talk about his season 9 base becau[character count exceeded, the following 10,319 characters have been archived and removed from this post (/j)] jokes aside, absolutely love everything keralis does, will never not be obsessed with everything he does <3

Xb: you know i gotta love him, just such a sweetheart. I dont watch him but you tend to see a lot of him if you watch a lot of keralis like i do. Absolutely delightful guy and such a sweet face :] love his little modern starter house too. Ive never actually seen his monument base thing but its so impressive. I, too, love prismarine so so much, and the oranges too its all so lovely, one of my favourite minecraft mobs <3 absolutely love his storage too with the guardian aquariums?? Amazing

Grian: another of my main povs! Love how open concept it is this season, how loose hes playing the game and how freely he's been playing it out this season, its been a really fun watch! Absolutely love the vibes of the chamber of sea critters its so atmospheric. Always love a grian build :]

Gem: another hermit whos building style i love yet dont watch sadly. First of all i just love how gem does the bright coloured roofs? Theyre very bright and i love the gradients she used with the moss and bamboo its so pretty. I didnt know her base was based on Dredge! Thats a game ive been meaning to check out and now im just more interested lmao. Gems another hermit who does just so much story with her builds and its all so interesting, definitely another high up on the list of hermits i really want to watch. Also i LOVE her little starter boat, its so cute and simple and so well executed. As well as the lighthouse! Honestly just seeing the collectors house now its gotta be one of my favourites, the colours and shapes and forms just look so nice? Nothing but praise for Gem tbh her builds this season are just lovely o7

Xisuma: we finally get to the 3rd and final hermit in the tie for my favourite! Despite the fact that... i havent watched like any of his episodes this season... i do tend to watch X more from his streams though in my defence, and hes the watchthrough im planning after i finish catching up with doc tbh. Not skipping his though cause ive already seen a lot of his base so theres not much that feels all that much of a spoiler. Plus i cant miss out on any Xisuma content <3 also to mention, i would love to be able to draw X one day but,,, i cant draw armour. One day o7 back to the topic of the tour though! I love the vibes and palette and everything hes going for this season! Its so structural and i just love the aztec inspiration! Its very natural and overgrown and its just amazing and impressive. X is just always just so delightful :] i honestly love his storage too with the walls of shulkers and all the colours and everything, and all the sorting and stuff its so cool. X does just so much impressive, i envy his organization especially. Honestly such a delightful person and i always love tuning into his streams and videos alike, and hopefully i finish my doc binge so i can watch xisumas season 10 episodes finally cause im really looking forwards to them in particular! He definitely doesnt give himself enough credit as a builder (a common theme among some hermits sadly). I love all the farms and stuff! I really want to get more into farming and stuff in general personally cause i love automation in any way i can, ive just yet to learn it for minecraft. The Golia copper machine is so cool?? I remember the big aging machine from i think last season, where it spread all the stuff out and brought them together when it was aged or something? Idk i love copper farms even if they are a little less useful now... x is just so cool and delightful :]

Wels: Tbh i know very little about welsknight, hes a pov i dont watch and one that doesnt really interact with my main povs, but hes a very pleasant individual! i really like his build and can appreciate a man with a distinct aesthetic! the silhouette and shapes of the castle is really nice! its just a very solid base :]

Beef: i dont watch beef personally but i did see quite a bit of him at the start of the season through... a certain unnamed perspective that i watched when the server first started, and also because he does show up through some other povs i watch too! He's a really nice guy and its always lovely when he stops by other povs :] i really do like how hes done his base this season with the big open farm, hes done it well!

Hypno: Another hermit i really dont know well, for similar reasons to welsknight, since he didnt really do a tour theres not as much i can say because i really dont know much of anything about him, to be honest. his base is really cozy though! ive only ever seen his exteriors as people fly past/over his base, but its really cozy and warm! ive always been a fan of pink and brown together in general :]

False: another hermit i dont know all that much, admittedly, but another lovely member of the server, i also dont really know what shes been up to this season, but i really like it! The colours, texturing, and shapes are all really interesting! I love the industrial underbelly, its so interesting and cool! False is actually another hermit i really would like to check out at some point! I love the vibes :] I also love the little hints of lore! the trees and terrain is also very nice! id like to see more of what shes been working on! if any false fans see this feel free to hit me up id love to know more abt her and all that!

Jevin: another hermit i dont know very well but i do see him on some other hermits streams sometimes and he is also a very good vibe when hes around! ive never seen his base before but i really love the enchanted forest! never get enough of those. plus the ambience and sounds are so unsettling and its just so cool. i love the palette and its very interesting! I love how dark and moody it all is, theres a really nice atmosphere to everything hes done so far!

And obviously finally the shopping district, what a lovely mishmash of all the hermits and their building styles and its all so lovely. Absolutely loved this video even though it took me like two whole days to get through. im so excited to watch more of these povs that ive gotten new interest in, not to mention the reminder that im only caught up on one of my three favourite hermits, im really overdue a few proper binges, huh?

If anyone actually did read all of these little blurbs thanks so so much for bearing with me, I know I definitely gave some hermits a little more time to talk about than others, and i feel bad for the first few because i may not have gone in depth about how i felt about them as i may have if theyd been later on, but i dont want to worry about revising all my thoughts on everything, this has already been a massive little project for me to basically journal these thoughts as i watched and i dont have the time to do it all over again lmao.

I love each and every hermit so so much for all they do, and im so glad grian did this mid-season tour so we could get a full look of the server all in one place! its lovely to get to see all the work everyone is putting in and how everything is coming together, i know theres always so much from the seasons before this i watched that i still know next to nothing about, so its really cool to get to look at it all!

Thanks for joinin me for this essay of thoughts and ramblings if you took the time, again i really do appreciate it! lmk what yall thought too im so curious to learn so much more that i may have missed in my watchthrough :]

o/

[cleromancy]

while from the doylist perspective the stories are specifically propping tim up compared to jason by doing this... i am obviously still very interested in, and compelled by, jason canonically having a pretty high opinion of tim going all the way back to their first meeting.

(for the record, absolutely nothing in-universe justifies jason having this opinion of tim up until tim springs him from prison imo. he beat the snot out of tim in tt29 and it wasn't even hard and yet for some fucking reason he still walks away thinking tim is a Better Robin than he was? like... ok. sure. more thoughts on this later in the post tho)

so the new earth (post-crisis pre-reboot) continuity tim-jason interactions we have, in order, are batman 617-618 (from batman: hush, this ones a retcon and barely counts, its just jason holding tim hostage with a batarang to his throat; and you might also get a glimpse of jay doing this in batman annual 25 lol but its in the other room so im not checking), tt29 (published in the middle of uth coming out, lol), tt47 (countdown tie-in), robin 177 and 182-183 (post-countdown, immediately after jason dumps his red robin costume and one of tims rogues fishes it out of the dumpster to wear, correctly intuiting *for some reason* that this will get to tim), and......... sigh. stupid battle for the stupid cowl.

(and, since were talking about jasons perspective, theres also the picture wall in lost days. i dont know what issue it is because to me lost days is not "made up" of "issues", it is one book i simply open to devour whole whilst weeping.)

i think tt 29 is the interaction i find the most frustrating because... we have an idea what tt29 would have been like if it were good. bc we have ga01 69-72. and granted Tim is such a cocky little shit (affectionate) that jason simply. Would probably not have been able to scare him no matter what, lol... but imagine if this fucking issue had been good.

ok cutting 4 length

the problem with johns. .......the FIRST problem with johns. is that he regularly has interesting ideas and his execution of them completely falls flat. the second problem with johns is that he can't write dialogue. the third problem with johns is that it was really really important to him that you understood what a Talented And Special Boy tim is but instead of showing you that he just forced other characters to. tell you. over and over. jason is not johns' only victim in this quest. (and johns was also not the only perpetrator, as we will see when i get to fuckin fabnic.)

but like i said i *am* actually interested in the potential here, because i do think there is potential.

and i also think that--at least when you read into it as deeply as i do--jason is sympathetic in this issue. (don't give me "hes beating up a child" crap here btw. jason's only 2-3 years older, tims a peer to him, they could easily have gone to high school together if jason hadnt fuckin died.) johns deliberately shows us Jason hoping raven gets a reprieve from the nightmares, and he certainly was *trying* to show us how much it would fucking suck to be remembered as the Bad Robin, forgotten except to be a cautionary tale, what kind of things that would do to a person emotionally. AND he makes a point of highlighting Jason's loneliness and isolation as robin, and. tbh i dont think the issue itself rly blames Jason for that. (you most certainly do not gotta hand it to him though. under no circumstances do you gotta hand it to johns for anything.)

and while jason tearing off his clothes to reveal his party city knockoff robin costume--the better to beat you with, my dear--was, erm. falling mostly on the wrong side of the line btwn camp and cringe... i do think jason writing his own name in blood on the wall was right on the money, *especially* because it was obviously not tims blood. like, tim wasnt bleeding anywhere near enough for that. it was either fake blood or jason prepped his own beforehand for them to DNA test--but also if they saw it before they saw tim, to make them fear for tims life, as a reminder of the risks theyre dealing with here.

oh but i was planning on talking specifically about like. what Jason might actually have seen in tim that left him with a positive impression. as-written? kinda nothing. lmao. or well the one thing imo is this

just kidding i couldn't find the panelz somehow despite posting them literally like yesterday and i ran into this lol:

>:| got distracted again. by this.

anyway i give up ill add the pics later. but its the exchange where jason has *decisively* won the fight, tims crumpled on the floor concussed and winded, and jason demands if tim *really* thinks he was good enough to tail bruce unnoticed for weeks.

and tim says "yes." hes beat up enough he can barely talk but there's still no hesitation whatsoever. and jason is *really* down on himself in this issue--he calls himself a failure, he feels like no one cared about his death, he feels unremembered. and jasons stated intentions here were to get the measure of tim but i also stand by the interpretation that he wanted to warn tim off of the sidekick gig, to remind him you uh. you have to be dick fucking grayson to survive it. (i dont believe either of them mentions him by name, but hey, dicks shadow is big enough for the both of them.)

i think what jason finds worthy of respect here--and, on top of that, intriguing enough that in robin 177 he entreats tim to join him--is the confidence, and also? at absolutely no point does tim believe jason is there to kill him. not a fuckin high bar, i know, but like i said i do think jason had *planned* to try and scare tim off (just also mega derailed himself by accident bc he got too in his feelings about the statue room 🥺), and... its not a bar he would have expected Tim to clear, is all im saying. particularly because while it is *possible* this took place in the middle of uth (tt 29 was released in november 05, between batman 646 and 647, which is the part where slade shows up bc black mask hired him to take jason out, so tt29 couldnt have happened in the middle of those two specific issues, but there are several other points at which jason could have taken a break in menacing gotham to fly to san Francisco), with Jason talking so negatively about himself i have to assume this is after the end of uth.

(you might be able to place this in the in-universe chronology by if/when teen titans mentions chemo dropping on bludhaven, which happens immediately before the bruce-jason-joker final showdown. however i dont feel like poking around for that or any other details to anchor tt29 to the other events happening at the time rn.)

i just also think so much of what jasons doing in this issue is like--he doesn't know *what* hes there to do. he had a plan and hes kinda fumbling it, not because tim is being especially resourceful but because jasons still licking his emotional wounds from uth, and titans tower is bringing up ones i dont think he ever realized hadnt healed. hes feeling everything at once. hes angry and hurt and full of self loathing but i think by the time tim simply says "yes," jason hits the stage of just being... burnt out. done lashing out, fucking tired, just wants to go home, if he can ever find it.

but i do think that "yes" would stick in his craw for a long time afterwards.

tt47: tim kicks jason in the nuts and pretty much declares them even for tt29 lolol. you may have seen my post about how jason only *sometimes* wears armor in countdown--hes drawn in the armored turtleneck and tac pants in tt47, but there are times in countdown hes out there fighting aliens and metas and shit in his jacket, a *t-shirt,* and *jeans.* just a squishy regular degular baseline human doing this and no one ever brings it up. but anyway. do i think tim would have seen jason wearing the equivalent of civvies plus a domino mask, narrow in on that, and immediately decide to kick him in the balls? i sure do. do i also think that this would make him rise in jasons estimation?

yeah. yeah, i really do. lol

anyway after this! after this is jasons briefish world-hopping stint as red robin saving the universe being a big damn hero and getting paid dust by everyone around him, in countdown; i think i mentioned before in this post that at the end he abandons the red robin suit in a dumpster, where it gets picked up by one of tims rogues. this storyline sucks and fabnic is a hack unfortunately. the rogue did it bc he wants tims attention or whatever. not important except for how irritating it is that fabnic fumbled a concept this juicy (tim inheriting and eventually purposely adopting The Bad Robin Mantle) which is also further fumbled by stupid battle for the stupid cowl, and the people who it falls to to salvage it are. johns again, in adventure comics 3, and yost, who is a better writer than johns or fabnic but not by like a huge margin.

and while i do think tim having a bad opinion of jason at this point was inevitable i find it so frustrating the way it was executed... like so often with Bad Tim Writing and also fuckin DC Editorial's Jason Slander Agenda shit it wasn't because in-universe thats how the characters would feel, the writer was using tim as a mouthpiece, and jasons competence and things he cares about arent taken seriously... BUT WHATEVER the point is that when Tim goes to stop Jason from his villainous scheme to reduce crime or whatevr jason has such a high opinion of him that he asks tim to join him:

and jasons loneliness, his desperation to be heard, is such a theme for him in the new earth/post crisis era and i wish it had been. Handled better lol are you noticig a theme here its that Jason has been written badly. (tim too, tbh.) and when tim says no jasons dejected but unsurprised acceptance breaks my heart. but to me the most interesting part of jasons appearance at the end of tims robin series is in 182, when tim--for absolutely no good reason--gives jason the means to break out of prison.

he says something about how its what Bruce would have wanted, but for. reasons i wont get too deeply into rn, that absolutely does not hold water.

anyway i just think there's no way jason doesn't start crushing on tim at least a little at this point. shrug.

bftc sucks and i dont want to look at it rn. but its also got examples of jasons high opinion of tim. and also im mad at it bc both countdown AND his appearances in robin feel like they could have been taking jason to a like. more of an antihero type of role and then we get bftc and morrison and its kind of. fucking hard to get jason anywhere near back on track after that for those of us who still like playibg in the post-crisis pre-reboot sandbox. and i wouldnt be mad about that if bftc had been good bc Jason absolutely does make an incredibly interesting and effective and tragic antagonist when handled well but well. he wasnt. and i have no idea what bftc would.have even been like if it was good bc it was so off the wall and dumb and assassinated actually *everyones* characters. so.

anyway

im just going to roll back to robin 183 now

jasons referring to the damage tim got when he got a little bit exploded in 180, this pretty nasty burn on the back of his head, which was actually why he wore jasons RR cowl for the first time (he was still robin). but what you do see here--aside from Tims narration which puts him *firmly* on the side of obnoxiously arrogant and judgmental instead of charmingly cocky in this issue, to my estimation, thanks for nothing fabnic--is the two of them on firmly cordial terms. jason still thinks more highly than tim does of him, but theyre asking each other about their injuries... tim caring about the wellbeing of people he doesn't even like is par for the course with him, ofc, but once again Jason doesn't really get that a whole lot. constantly haunted by this panel from countdown btw:

does he though!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

here is another jaytim preboot canon interactions post from a few months ago with some more thoughts, some repeated lol.

anyway. incoherent rambling complete for now. however. jaytim time is all the time 👍 i will revisit this.

[darkdemeter]

Dem Hi! I'm back with a bit of an unhinged ask here:

Im sure this doodle gives you an idea where this is going. I was just making myself some tea, and I was thinking about Lovers In Eden (i was going to listen to a song called Eastward of Eden by Amelia Day,hence the association). And Since I am a film student, a writer and i took script classes as my subject las trimester, i offer you this unhinged recap of my conspiracy theory. So LIE (Lover in Eden) introduces us to the idea that Strife killed Y/N after a bloodlust outburst,right? Well, at first i didnt think too much of it, but then the chapter ends with the four on earth, which felt a little disembodied from the prologue. Which brings me to the hipothesis which is: Strife's lover is on earth,reborn without their memories. My proof for this theory is this: 1) We know that in the darksiders universe there is such thing as a well of souls, we know they go through the kingdom of the dead to repent and then be reborn through the well. 2) you wouldntve put the line "Love slayer" if it wasnt relevant to the plot. (Writing often times includes phrasing things a certain way to hint at other things). 3) Why would you close the chapter where you did? What relevance does the fact that the four are now on earth have? Simple, Strife will find a reborn,survivor Y/N and will fall in love with them (and have a crisis once he realizes its a whole like soulmates finding eachother again situation) 4) and last (which came to me as i wrote this) if you were to center the story only on Strife and the reader without the reader being reborn, you wouldve just started it from the medieval age/wherever strife met the reader and not end with the four on earth. Of course dont gotta tell me if im right,dont want to spoil the whole fic anyways. But I felt the need to share this with you. (I genuienly felt like the pepe silvia meme). And yeah, one offshoot of all this is that maybe the reader isnt a reborn soulmate, and that the prologue could just set up this inherit guilt and fear towards love that Strife has. Until we get the next chapter, i lay in wait...scheming/lhj/hj Have a nice rest of your day and i hope you've enjoyed my unhinged ramble. -Jer. PD: i feel so silly for sending this whole thing but as a fellow writer i know theres nothing we love more than ppl theorizing about our stuff. So here you go. I hope it doest read as overbearing,i just genuienly love your stuff.

First off, I love your pepe doodle! It’s so perfect. In fact I find it so funny that I made this a little bit ago myself... (As much as I'd love to rant and such about my AUs' lore and headcanons, I made this for shits and gigs)

I absolutely adore hearing theories readers have about my fics. (Sorry this has taken FOR-EV-ER to respond to, I'm terrible with replying at times)

I also fucking LOVE that you're a film student, I think that makes this whole theory situation even better because I do tend to have a very movie-esque thought process when writing. (Blooper reel and BTS footage rent free in my head)

And I think I've got the mind stewing a bit with that recent post, Flowers From My Lover. Without hopefully giving away anything, you do have some valid and interesting points in your theories and has me going, "Oh Jer is good little detective." You get a cookie for your theory skills!

There are indeed certain key details and clues I put in on purpose and it's so interesting to see what readers pick up on. And yes, the well of souls is involved to some extent in this plotline, but not in the way you might think...

I also find your choice of the word "reborn" interesting. Very obviously and right out the gates, I will say that yes, reader is alive in this story. But it's the manner in which reader's alive and again, the reborn theory is interesting and again, possibly not in a way you're expecting. Though it seems rather simple, I will tease that there is... quite a bit more to it than what's at face value.

And I wanna tease this little clue too because it is one of my favourites: It's interesting how the fic's title has a double meaning in plain sight...

[terranceholdsapencil]

I just watched space babies and Im gonna put some moments under the cut that are just so,,,

DOCTOR WHO SERIES 14 EPISODE 2 SPOILERS‼️ "Space babies"

-lets make this episode into one big exposition/lore dump so everyone knows whats going on

-RANI MENTIONED

-dinos <3

-ruby stepping on an actual butterfly and 15 blowing life into it again 😭 that was so stupid I absolute love it

-"One day this is wyoming"

-"Aha! Is that like a, uh, matter transporter like in star trek?" "hehehE! weve gotta visit them someday."

Im not even much of a star trek fan but I could totally watch doctor who with my star trek-autistic dad if there was a crossover. Also a crossover would be bangers.

-"Most of the universe is knackered, babes" fair.

-something about "the question is, why did I run?" "cause it was scAry!" "It was new. I LOVE meeting new things, so why did it give ME the shivers? I couldn´t run fast enough I was like 👏 WOOSH!"

I was like *clap* WOOSH!! (New stim unlocked)

-"So, this place, grows babies. What for? FoOd?" "fOo- who-whOT. FOOD? Theyre not tOmAtOes"

The way he said tomatoes is very special to me. As well as the general absurdity of that whole moment, actually

-giving her phone the space-time-signal boost!!! THAT MADE ME SO HAPPY TO SEE ON SCREEN AGAIN

-space babies. First I was a bit annoyed and baffled by the way he kept saying space babies but eventually he said it so often I just went "SPACE BABIES :D"

-ruby and 15 handling the space babies??? 😭 Man that was so pure

-maybe thats growing up queer and autistic but this line killed me

"Nobody grows up wrong.

You are, what you are, and that is magnificent"

Okay Im just gonna sit down and CRY because I really needed my comfort character to tell me this. Im not ready for it yet but I still need it. Ill get back to this once Im at peace with myself. To heal.

-"because I, am absolutely lovely, arent I? 🥰"

-"And do you wanna know my secret?

Theres no one like me in the whole, wide, universe. No one like me exists, and thats true of everyone. Its not a problem, captain pops. Its a superpower 💪 High five!"

-i absolutely laughed out loud and almost woke my father when ruby tried to calm the space babies and 15 kept scaring them.

"Theres no such things as the bogeman. That thing, was more-- sort of like, a, uhhh," "BOGEYMAN!"

-"That should recalibrate the whole shebang"

-abortion allegory got like super spelled out at one point and that was a bit awkward but I have no strong opinion on it, because the point they make still stands.

"Hang on. So, the planet down below will refuse to stop the babies being born, but once theyre born, they dont look after them??"

-the way jocelyn said 'because its terrifying" after 15 said "and WhY was I so scared?"

Also: "Yeah but Ive met a million ugly bugs, *I´m* and ugly bug, ThAt THIng, made me run, I just wonder why" youre not an ugly bug gorgeous

-"babies with a flame thrower?!" Was possibly the stupidest thing Ive ever seen and Im so happy cause that is exactly how doctor who works. Babies with flame throwers. Who even thought of that.

Also reminded me of the fact daleks had flame throwers at one point

-"The teaching software, it told a story!" "it invented the bogeyman!" "For the babies 🥺" "For the space babies 🥺" (i love them)

-snot monster

-it did confuse me how familiar they seem already. And that he basically gave her a tardis key before she even really agreed to travel with him. I LOVE them dont get me wrong but that felt too quick

-seeing mum at christmas <3

-"tell your mum not to slap me" someone has never recovered from jackie and sylvia

-ohhh dna scan

-probably something I forgot but:

Episode was fun. Too exposition heavy at times and structured differently from 'normal' who. But fun. And also super silly. And we LOVE super silly.

Space Babies. Space babies with flame throwers.

[cod-thoughts]

Sorry you got some bad news, I hope you're doing okay <3 Numbers for the ask game; 4, 7, 38 please!

I'll be fine, it's just stuff on top of stuff on top of stuff so uhh not the best time and i have my finals starting in a few days too so its uhhh not great but i'll be fine it is what it is :O

Ask game in question!

4: How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Care to share one of them?

Oh boy theres a LOT, i use notion to like keep track of all my ideas cause it syncs nicely and its a good archive, i dont use it to write cause the spell check sucks lol but its good storage. The problem with that system tho is the moment i get an idea i jot it down there so theres currently 47 ramblings and ideas, some are similar so i eventually combine them! I did a random number generator to pick the idea lol and it was number 13: reverse dating trope, basically people not believing that a couple is together! Havent decided who yet but its probably gonna end up as a 5+1 knowing me lol

7: Share a snippet from one of your favorite pieces of prose you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.

This was hard, mostly cause i dont think most of my stuff is that good but id have to say this section from day 1 of ghostpriceweek and its probably the work im most proud of to this day, i just think it flowed so well and that their voices are really solid. Here's a part of it that i like for no particular reason:

"He’d finished heating up a tin of beans, stirring it absently before putting the lid on it to keep it warm, and set the kettle on for tea, knowing Price would be done soon. The small tasks felt grounding, almost domestic—there’s that word again, strange but, maybe, it was what had been playing at the edges of his mind for a while now. This rare ease, this strange new rhythm. Ghost found himself watching the steam rising from the kettle, a bit lost in the warmth that filled the air.

He wasn’t quite sure when it happened—when the lines between Price as a superior, a mentor, had blurred into something… more. It was a disquieting thought, one he’d been trying to keep at bay, though not with much success. And here he was, cooking up beans and making tea, so utterly settled in Price’s presence that the prospect of leaving, of returning to the job, made him feel something uncomfortably close to hollow.

He never imagined this was even possible for him. To be alive and wanting something so fiercely. To want a life outside of being a soldier. It was all he ever knew but as the kettle clicked and he made them a cup each, exactly how Price liked it, it hit him like a blow: this was it. This was what he wanted, more than he’d ever wanted anything.

The bathroom door creaked open, and Price emerged, towelling his hair. He’d discarded his usual gear in favour of an old grey t-shirt, soft and worn, that clung to his still-damp skin. He looked… ordinary. Beautifully ordinary. Ordinary was the wrong word entirely for that man, Ghost realised, because there was something extraordinary in the way Price took up space, in how naturally he filled the room."

38: Talk about a review that made your day.

OOO this was somehow even harder omg i love every comment or tag i get they all bring me immense joy, even if its just a bunch of emojis i love it thank you <33 but i will say that these in particular made my day as it was an absolute mess of a day and i was really doubting everything; about to delete said story but @nekrosmos the angel that he is dropped this in the tags and so did @jgvfhl (excuse the light-mode my desktop for some reason decided its in light-mode lol) and it made me literally light up and altered my brain chemistry for that whole day so thank you both genuinely <33 and sorry for the random tag whoops