#theres something DEEPLY wrong in her head

[skybristle]

countless swirling sparks ..... reblog if you think she should kill people

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[b14augrana]

Close By Me

When your team finds out about your upcoming departure from Barça to play for Lyon, your relationship with your captain takes a turn

Alexia Putellas x teen!reader

masterlist

Warnings: angst, kinda mean ale but theres a happy ending

A/N: cute and short one for ya. i really like this for some reason 🥲 i hope you do too!! ‘nobody gets me’ + ‘white ferrari’ in my head while i wrote this 🫶🏼

“You’re what?” Alexia almost yelled, her eyes bulging in shock.

The others stood around her with hands on their mouths, and the frown on Aitana’s face made your heart ache.

“I’m.. leaving, to play in Lyon,” you mumbled. You didn’t want to cry in front of all your teammates, but your lip quivered and before you knew it, there was a steady flow of tears going down your cheeks.

Your shoulders shook with every sob, but you were shrouded in warmth from the tight hugs of your teammates as they ran up to you. Aitana’s arms were wrapped around you, and you could smell Patri’s perfume and feel Frido’s fingers combing through your hair.

But there was something missing. Someone missing.

When you peeked through a gap in the hug, you could see Alexia standing dormant behind you all, her gaze fixed on the group with an unreadable expression.. one that looked similar to disappointment.

Trainings were different since then. Your favourite part used to be passing with Alexia and playing keepie-uppie tennis, but there was a tense energy that followed her as you walked up to her, a ball in your hands and a hopeful smile on your face asking to be partners.

You guys didn’t play keepie-uppie tennis. You did regular one-touch passes instead, which wasn’t nearly as fun and it started to feel like a competition as Alexia kicked the ball harder and harder every time until it got out of control and hit your calf with a loud slap.

You frowned deeply, rubbing your calf to soothe the reddening skin as Alexia walked towards you. At first, you thought she was going to help you, but instead she flicked the ball up into her hands and walked away.

You had never seen her be so cold, let alone be on the receiving end of her dull behaviour. It confused you, because you didn’t do anything wrong to make her act this way.

Her coarse behaviour continued for a week. It varied from scrutinising glances to harsh criticism’s , and you were beginning to realise that this new issue stemmed from the day you had told the team about your departure.

The others were fine. Alexia wasn’t. She was a changed woman ever since that day.

Games were a nightmare. You moved tentatively, scared of making any mistakes in front of Alexia, but that in itself was a mistake because you got berated for your indecisive moves.

She ran over to you, her face crumpled in sheer anger that made you recoil backwards slightly as the string of angry Catalan sentences came spilling out paired with aggressive hand gestures until she finally stormed away, returning to the play.

You felt like a little girl again as you stood stupidly in the middle of the pitch, trying to calm down your shaky lip and prevent any tears from falling in front of a full stadium, but you were overwhelmed with sadness and embarrassment to move. Alexia never yelled at you. She never blamed you for any mistakes.

You thought she understood how it felt to be so young and scared, given all the talks and reassurance she gave you whenever she felt like you weren’t good enough to be playing in the first team. You obviously thought wrong.

“She’s upset, hermanita,” Aitana whispered to you in the locker room after the game, her hand rubbing your back consolingly. “You mean more to her than it seems. You’re like a daughter to her, mi querido, and she isn’t used to loving someone so closely.”

You leaned into her touch, succumbing to her hug. In the locker room, it was just you and Aitana.. and your thoughts.

Back in Alexia’s apartment, there was a tense atmosphere that lingered as she sunk onto her couch, any traces of happiness absent in her face.

She had plans for you at Barcelona. She knew that you could better than her if not the best, and you’d help her crush Lyon and give her club a feel of European glory once again. All those dreams, all her plans, they were ruined.

She felt betrayed, not so much by you, but by her club for not being able to see the potential right in front of their eyes and for letting you go. She didn’t know how to handle losing you, the little girl she watched grow up for years, to the team that she had never been able to beat in her career. It would be harder than ever to try beat them now that you were set to be in their squad.

Alexia wasn’t emotional. She didn’t want anyone to think she felt strongly towards anything except winning, Barça, and winning again. If you were going to play for Lyon, she wanted to make sure you were ready, by making you face the worst side of her to prepare you for playing with the best.

Second best, behind Barça. Obviously.

You had spent your entire Friday night scheming up ways to get back on good terms with Alexia.

That’s how you ended up on her front doorstep, hesitating to ring the doorbell, with your means of mediation in hand.

Before you could weigh up all the possible outcomes, you lurched forward and hit the doorbell. You could hear footsteps inching closer to the door from behind it, and you scrambled to straighten up.

When Alexia opened the door, there you were, big-eyed and scuffing the floor with your shoe nervously.

“Hi Ale,” you started nervously, looking at the ground momentarily before gazing back up at her and sticking your hand out, “I made cookies… double chocolate chip, your favourite.”

You stayed up all night making them to perfection. You kept the slightly burnt or malformed batches for your family to eat and gave her the batch you were most proud of.

She took them from your hands, and the smile on her face made you breathe a silent sigh of relief. She looked at the container, examining the batch of cookies before nodding towards the interior of her home, “Come inside, please.”

You stepped into her apartment, a familiar place that you were sure to miss once you were in France. She gestured for you to sit down as she placed your cookies on the bench, but you stayed standing. The woman turned back around and was surprised to see you still standing until you spoke.

“I don’t want you to be angry at me, Ale. I want to be on your good side because I really love you and being your friend,” you rambled, conveying weeks of rough emotions to her in a minute, “I miss playing keepie-uppie tennis with you and I hope you’ll still care about me when I go to Lyon and–”

You were cut off as you were smothered in a warm, tight hug. The blonde wrapped her arms around you, and when she pulled away, she looked at you with a soft expression.

“I care for you now and I will, forever,” she whispered, moving strands of hair out of your face. Your cheeks went warm, and the feeling of tears emerging in your eyes swallowed you whole, the only difference being what they represented; they weren’t tears of sadness or worry. This time, they were happy tears from finally communicating with Alexia and getting through to the fact that she still loved you.

Her hand reached your shoulder to place a steady grip on it as she spoke once more, her voice low and on the verge of breaking as shown by the slight shakiness to it. “I’m so sorry for how I acted, I just– how am I supposed to let you go, mi todo?”

“Don’t,” you responded, your lips teetering between a smile and a frown.

“You are more than just my captain, Ale, you’re my second mamá. You always will be. It’s impossible to let that go.”

[dongminz]

my reality . . ᝰ.ᐟ (han taesan)

pairing: nonidol!taesan x fem!reader; genre: fluff, highschool au, opposites attract; warnings: cursing

ᯓᡣ𐭩 what happens when han taesan, a quiet boy with a cold demeanor, falls for a girl working part-time at his favorite record shop?

𐙚 cart • wc: 610 | please ignore grammatical errors!

chapter 1: there was something special in the air previous ✦ chapter list ✦ character desc ✦ next

“han dongmin, myung jaehyun. can you stay after class?". the boys look at each other confused. did they do something wrong? “dude did you do something stupid again?” the two-toned-haired boy asked his friend. “what?? no, i didn’t do anything” the puppy-like boy replied, pouting. “boys, there's a festival coming up 2 months from now and i wanted to ask if your band could perform? preferably 3-5 songs, you can perform an original song too if you want.” after hearing this, the puppy-like boy replied excitedly “we would be happy too!! thank you, sir!” 

woonhak + hyungs (new messages) myungjae: GUYS GUESS WHAT riririwoo: what?? woonhakie: WHAT myungjae: WE'RE PREORFMOSNGNWEFDKVKVK sungho: we're what?? taesan: we're performing at the school festival sungho: WHAT woonhakie: WHAT riririwoo: WHAT leehan: ???

“dude i can’t believe we’re gonna perform” a slightly younger boy says. “we have to get our lineup ready, do we even have any unreleased songs??” sungho says panicking, “chill, me, woonhak, and taesan can write it” jaehyun says reassuring sungho. woonhak asks “should we work on it today? jaehyun are you free after school?”. “yeah sure, i think i’m free today. go text taesan if he’s free too”. the younger boy replied, “alright”

taesan hyung (online 🟢) woonhakie: hi hyung taesan hyung: whats up woonhakie: just wondering if you were free after school, me n jaehyun hyung are gonna start writing some songs for the festival taesan hyung: sorry, i dont think i’ll be able to join you guys i gotta help my mom w something, and theres some new releases at the record shop that i wanna check out woonhakie: alright, let me just tell hyung

after school, taesan walks to the record shop near his house excited to see what new vinyls they had in stock. when he entered, he hears a familiar tune. ‘oh it’s reality by richard sanderson’ he realizes. it was a song his father used to play in the car when he was younger.

he was looking around the shop humming to it’s tune, until a specific vinyl caught his eye. it was the a song for you by the carpenters album. “ooo that’s a good one!!” a girl suddenly commented about the vinyl, “that just got in stock today! it’s a really good album, one of my favorites from it is top of the world!”. taesan didn’t know why but it felt like his whole world just stopped. was it because she also liked the same song as he did? was it the way her dimples showed while she was ranting? or maybe it was just the way her eyes sparkled while she was so deeply engrossed about her interest.

“hellooo?? sir are you there?” flustered because he didn’t hear her, taesan had replied “oh sorry, what were you saying again?”. “that’s alright! i said that you could rent the vinyl out for 6 days if you weren’t ready to buy it yet!” the girl answered cheerfully. “oh alright i’ll keep that in mind, thank you”, the girl had nodded with a smile in reply. taesan left the shop soon after looking around a bit more, but he couldn’t keep her out of his head. it was as though there was something special in the air making him feel this way. wait, what? him, han taesan. the boy who had always focused on his music and paid no attention to the girls at school, has a girl stuck on his mind? suddenly he felt his phone vibrate.

mom (3 new messages) mom: taesan?? where are you? you said you would help me, did you forget? you better be here in 10 minutes.

oh shit.

author’s note: please keep in my that this is my first au!! i’m not used to writing yet so it might not be the best 🥹 but nonetheless !! i hope you guys will enjoy it 🫶 trying to improve everyday :))

taglist: @tkooooop, @blumisiu, @cococunchy if you want to be a part of the taglist, feel free to comment or send in an ask !! enjoy 💞

© dongminz 2024 ; all rights reserved

[silvervioletvalentine]

❣️!Theres a thin line between love and hate!❣️

Pairing : max verstappen X (single mom!Cherrie!)

Word count : 10k

Summary: in which there’s a very thin line between love and ‘hate’.

Max couldn't stop side eyeing the biggest pain in his ass, the sharpest thorn in his side , the mould to a perfectly good piece of bread - the most annoying woman who ever lived .. narrowing his eyes at her in confusion as he watched her move her body from side to side , looking down at her feet as she mumbled something to herself , seeming to be in her own little world .

Taking a deep breath to control the urge to snap at her to keep still, he glanced around at the track to see every other driver stood politely and still as each one of their national anthems played, they were all apart of a new ceremony to kick off the start of the season again.

Each driver was lined up neatly and had their hands either on their chest or crossed behind their back or front in respect . The host took turns introducing each and everyone of them, their faces appearing on the large screen that was hung up on the railings for everyone to see.

Placing his hand over his own chest too and pursing his lips when it got to his turn to be introduced , his national anthem playing as everyone went silent in respect.

Only His eyes started twitching as through the silence he heard Cherrie start to hum to herself, turning his head slightly as he watched her start to Bob her head and sway side to side as though she was dancing along to some kind of music that he couldn't hear.

Then his eyes zoomed in on her long wavy hair that was blew slightly back in the breeze and then he saw it .

She had in Wireless headphones.

Unable to stop the way his eyes widened in disbelief , as he watched her start to sing to the music that only she could hear . Seeming to not care that everyone else was respectfully standing still as they were presented to the excited crowd around them.

"And I'm crazy, but you like it ..Loca, loca, loca...You like that it ain't easy...Loca, loca, loca" she started singing to herself . Shaking her hips a little, not even noticing her teammates disbelieving stare.

His mouth opening and closing several times as he looked around him to see if anybody else was noticing this shit too.

But everyone else was too busy listening to the national anthem and doing their duties, smiling and nodding at the cameras screening them.

Everyone but Cherrie.

He really should have known that she would do something like this. She never took anything seriously! Feeling the familiar creeping of annoyance and anger drive him up the wall just at the sight of her next to him.

It was absolutely no secret that the two teammates didn't exactly see eye to eye... or wheel to wheel for that matter .

Max didn't know what it was about her that dug so deeply underneath his skin, but he just couldn't stand her .

And every time that they were near each other he felt a need to snap at her or run the fuck away. Usually a heavy mixture of the two.

She was just so fucking obnoxious and arrogant . She spent half of her time bossing everybody around and demanding that it was her way or absolutely no way.

She just didn't seem to care about the rules or about what was wrong or right, she just went right ahead and did whatever the fuck she wanted without caring about the consequences of her usually stupid actions.

The amount of times that he and Cherrie had gotten into a argument because of how stubborn and careless she was.

It Was slighty insane and no matter how many times max told himself to be the bigger person and not to retaliate , it was like all of his rationality and common sense just left him whenever she looked at him with her smug little smile, her eyes shining at him like 'ha! Fuck you!'.

It drove him crazy and no amount of forced team bonding or scoldings from their team could make them get along.

I mean , how could he get along with the same woman who had cut a large hole in the backside of his racing suit after he had told her that he was going to be the leading car on the track?

If it hadn't been for his laughing assistant pointing out the giant hole in his jumpsuit that showcased his ass, he might have had the most embarrassing moment of his career because of her .

And to make it all even worse, Cherrie had whizzed past him in her car and mockingly wiggled her fingers at him as she did so.

Max had never wanted to hurt a woman bedore. But In that moment he could have strangled her.

He turned to look at Charles besides him instead , wondering why no one else was noticing the infatuating woman dancing next to him.

"Do you see this?" He whispered underneath his breath to the Ferrari driver , a scowl on his face as he saw Cherrie wiggle her hips some more out of the corner of his eye.

Charles peered at him curiously, still keeping his hand pressed against his chest as another drivers national anthem played out.

"See what?" He whispered back to him confused to why he looked like he was about to blow a fuse.

Max nodded his head jerkily to his left , motioning rudely towards his teammate.

"She's listening to Shakira! She's got headphones in! Look!" He hissed at him.

The both of them turning their heads just in time to see Cherrie shake her ass to the music that was playing through her headphones , bobbing her head along obliviously .

"I guess she doesn't know the things that I'd do to please you ...I take you to the malecón por el caminito

They saw your girlfriend looking for me with a rifle

'Cause, we're dancin' Mambo, oh, what she don't allow it?" She sang along passionately , flicking her hair and trying hard not to start dropping low like she would at the club.

Charles just giggled quietly, shaking his head as he warily eyed max who looked like he wanted to throttle her

"She's a good singer." Was all he said to him, immediately looking away once max shot him a disbelieving look in return.

"Un-fucking-believable." He mutteeed to himself bedore glancing up at the screen and nearly jumping out of skin once he noticed that Cherrie was being presented , the cameras zooming in on her dancing beside him withoit a care in the world.

"Cherrie!" He hissed at her , kicking her ankle with his foot to get her attention.

She just lazily tilted her head at him, popping out one headphone and raising her eyebrow at him uncaringly.

"What?" She innocently mumbled bedore spotting herself on the big screen and immediately giving the camera a wave . Winking at it too even though she had no idea what the hell was going on, too busy in her own little world to care.

Max just blankly stared at her, not amused in the slightest.

"Turn your music off now! You're being rude. You're gonna make the whole team look bad!" He snapped at her before inhaling sharply when she just continued to wiggle her butt to the music she was listening to.

"And stop shaking your ass for fucks sake!" He almost shouted at her. Forcefully Tearing his eyes away from said shaking ass to glare at her.

He tried to ignore the way Charles and lando were snickering at them , Charles having nudged the other driver to get him to notice what was going on too.

Cherrie just glared back at him, smugly smirking to herself as she continued to shake her hips, even going as far as offering him one of the headphones for him to listen to.

"And I'm crazy, but you like it

'Cause the kinda girl like me, they're running out of in the market." She sang winking at him, dodging the incoming kick to her ass that he tried to give her.

"There's something wrong with you. You're an absolute rude asshole!" He insulted her , sighing in relief once the presentation was over. The drivers now being aloud to disperse and head over to greet the fans if they wanted to.

Max started walking back to where the redbull garage was, not wanting to be around her for another second. Unfortunately for him, she was his teammate and they both had to get ready for their race.

Skipping over to him so that they were walking side by side , she nudged his side over and over again just to annoy him so more.

Enjoy the way that he was stubbornly refusing to look at her , his face set and eyes staring straight ahead as he tried to ignore her.

Though she could see the angry flush creeping up his cheeks and the flaring of his nostrils the more she poked and prodded at him like a child.

The worst thing being that she actually had a child of her own too .

Max couldn't believe that this childish maniac was a mother and he grew more and more worried by the day. Wondering if little juniper was going to grow up and become batshit insane too.

He felt sorry for the poor kid if this was the bullshit that the three year old had to put up with at home.

"You need to lighten up Mad Max! When was the last time you got laid?! You're so tense!" She taunted him , trying and failing to hold back her grin when he gave up on trying to ignore her and instead shot her a look that to warn her that she was walking on very thin line with him.

But Cherrie had always had great balance on a tightrope so she just kept pushing.

Like always. Annoying max was her favourite thing to do. No doubt about it.

"Never mind I can already guess the answer. Judging by the giant stick lodged up your ass! No girl wants to deal with that. You're so boring!" She groaned loudly as she followed him into the garage , waving at a few of the mechanics that they passed.

Max felt red hot anger pass through him, shoving her in her side a little too hard and causing her to go flying into the shelf. Scowling at her in frustration when she just let out a loud laugh and straightened herself back up, picking up a spanner that she had knocked over during the fall and waving it at him with a grin.

"Maybe this will help loosen that stick up! Maybe we can asked Jerry to help-" she went to call one of their engineers over.

Max quickly leaping over to her side and pressing his hand against her big mouth, dragging her around the corner with him so that she couldn't embarrass him in front of anymore people.

"You need to shut the hell up! It's absolutely no wonder that Matt left you . No man wants to put up with someone this fucking irritating!" He snapped at her. Feeling a pang of instant remorse the moment he said it as she paused in his grasp.

He was expecting her to get upset , mabye curse him out and hit him. But he should have known better than wasting any guilt on her.

Because she just snorted out a laugh and grinned up at him, patting his arm like he was the stupid one.

"I'll have you know that I dumped his ass . Not the other way around! And where still great friends!" She informed him proudly , continuing to trail after him to the redbull hospitality room so that they could get ready for the race .

Max scoffed as he placed his hand on her head and gave her another little shove so that she didn't beat him to the door. Childishly nudging her away with his hip when she tried to push past him to get to the door again.

"If juniper wasn't his child there would be no way that he would willingly hang around you! I'm pretty sure that he's balding because of you Cherrie. That's how fucking annoying you are!" He snapped at her as they both stumbled through the door, neither willing to let the other one go first.

Both of their assistants looked up from the table that they were sat at with matching looks of exasperation as they watched the two champions continue to bicker with each other and shove at eachother like little kids .

Cherrie huffed at him, giving him a particularly hard shove back that sent him falling down onto the couch in the room.

"He was already balding! It's in his family genes! You however , what's your excuse asshole?! It's a god job that you wear that hat so I don't have to see your stupid face!" She shouted at him, picking up a throw pillow and throwing it at said stupid face.

He just stuck out his foot and tripped her , Cherrie yelling as she went flying over his lap. Her face smushing into the cushion as her legs hung off his lap at a weird angle.

Max snickering as he smacked the back of her thighs with the palm of his hand bedore pushing her off of him so that she rolled onto the floor into a heap of limbs instead .

"Fuck you!" He snapped back at her. Placing his foot on-top her back so that she couldn't get back up.

Smirking to himself as he watched her try to wiggle away from him, slapping her hand against his other leg with a pissed off huff.

Neither paying any mind to the disapproving looks that their team was giving them.

"There isn't a hat big enough to cover your hideous face!" He insulted her . Finally lifting his foot so that she could stagger back to her feet with a glare.

Placing her hands firmly on her hips as she stood right in front of him, squinting her eyes at him in disbelief .

"Hideous?! I was voted hottest woman of the year!" She reminded him arrogantly. Flicking her hair at him as she stomped over to where her bag was left, pulling out of her phone .

Max just scoffed , leaning back against the couch and placing his hands behind his head as he watched her .

"Yeah by blind people! Trust me if they knew what you were like they wouldn't be saying that!" He wasn't stupid enough to deny that she was in fact one of the hottest women that he had ever seen.

It was just her big mouth that put him off. There had been many a times that he had catched Himself gazing at her from across the room, in awe by how fucking beautiful she was.

Only for her to spot him looking at her , then she would swear at him and call him some creative insult till he remembered that it didn't matter how pretty she was, she was a fucking asshole. And she loved to make his life a misery!

Cherrie just ignored him as she focused on something on her phone, sitting down on the couch opposite him instead .

There was silence for a few minutes as max just continued to stare at her , wondering who she was texting as he saw a little smile creep on her lips making a weird sensation fill his stomach at the sight.

Unable to take his curiosity anymore , he broke the silence again.

"Which flavour of the week are you texting now?" He took a jab at the way that she seemed to go through men like they were candy. Spitting out the ones that she didn't like the taste of and only keeping around the best ones till she had enough of her fill of sugar.

Max was pretty sure that her newest fling had been some big shot footballer in france .

He had seen photographs of the two of them at a club together, dancing and kissing till they left together in the early mornings. He had stopped reading the article after that. Not wanting to know anymore.

Cherrie merely gave him a unimpressed glance before turning back to her phone.

"Matt just sent me some pictures of juniper in the new merch." She found herself telling him. The mothers pride in her making her want to arrogantly show of how cute her daughter was to anybody that would listen.

Max rose his brows, getting up off the couch and walking over to her . Plopping himself on the seat beside her , he bent his head so that he could see the screen of her phone as well.

"They do tiny versions?" He said surprised as he recalled just how small juniper was. Even for a three year old she was smaller than most of them.

But then again , he thought to himself as he took a glance at the 5,3 woman beside him, so was her mother.

Cherrie hummed and tilted her phone to show him a picture of juniper wearing a redbull top with her signature and car number on.

"I had them make it. She has a few now. The other drivers keep sending us their merch as well. She looks a little odd cause she loves to wear Charles Ferrari cap and Lewis's Mercedes shirt!" She mused with a grin as she flicked through the pictures to show him.

Max smiled , his eyes softening as he looked at the picture of a grinning juniper on the screen. With a hat far too big for her tiny head, her long curls a mess all around her face, her chubby cheeks pink and eyes as big as bambi's. Barely any teeth in her mouth as she grinned at the camera cheekily.

"She's got the wrong redbull shirt on. She needs the champions one." He said with a smirk , already reminding himself to get her a mini version of his own merch for juniper to wear.

There was absolutely no way that he was going to let the three year old wander around in Ferrari and Mercedes clothes. No fucking way!

Cherrie just rolled her eyes, nudging him for his cheek. "She had for the champions one. The champion is her mommy. She doesn't need a cap to prove that." She muttered smugly , locking her phone after she had finished showing him all the latest photos of her daughter.

A lot of people thought it was strange how she and max were permanently at each other's throats yet her daughter was Max's favourite person in the whole world.

As soon as max had seen the baby in her arms when she was just one years old, barely able to speak and just gargling strange noises at him, something inside him had melted .

Forgetting what they had been arguing about almost immediately as he held out his arms to hold her baby with a grin, juniper shrieking happily when Cherrie reluctantly passed her over to him.

A shocked look on her pretty face when she watched max casually walk away with her baby, talking down to her in a cute baby voice as he went around the paddock to show her off like he was the proud father and not the enemie of her mother .

Cherrie hadn’t been able to separate them after that , and whenever she brought juniper to the races with her , max would come over to spend some time with her one on one. Claiming that it was because he didn't trust Matt , her baby daddy, to actually teach the kid some 'manly' things .

Cherrie had merely laughed . Watching max let her baby put a tiara on his head as they had a pretend tea party in the paddock. Even letting her put blush on his face.

No one had believed a word that he said but she wasn't going to complain.

Max may have been an absolute pain in her ass but her daughter loved him and without him saying it, she knew that max adored juniper to pieces too.

"Is she at matt's tonight?" He asked her as he walked over to his side of the room to grab his racing suit, a wall dividing them so they could get changed .

Seeing her assistant motion for her to ger ready as well, she put down her phone and grabbed her own gear as well. Taking the racing suit off the hanger , she spoke around the fabric that covered her face as she pulled off her shirt.

"Yes and No. She's with him right now but the babysitter is looking after her tonight until I get back.." she informed him as she nearly fell over trying to get her fireproofs on.

Max hummed to himself as he put his arms through the jumpsuit , grinning to himself as he heard Cherrie let out a loud curse as she banged into something, a small 'ow' escaping her making him

Chuckle at how clumsy she was.

"Get back from where?" He asked her confusedly. Assuming that she would just be going straight home from the track once they were done racing.

Cherrie huffed "from the club. We go to them after every race . Well, you don't but I do.." she said.

Reminding him of the fact that his teammate was an absolute party animal, if there was a party then she was going to be there no matter what.

It was how she had gotten juniper after all. Though max hoped that she had leaned her lesson from that one, they really didn't need another mini Cherrie running around.

Juniper was already a handful. Turning into an exact replica of Cherrie with her sarcasm and little attitude. They even shared the same judgmental expression on their pretty faces. Max had almost had a stroke when the three year old had looked him up and down with a scrunch or her face as she asked him

"Why are you dressed like a ugly golfer?" When he had shown up in a polo neck and chinos.

She had made him go back to his dressing room and put on something else instead until she approved, all the while Cherrie just cackled proudly at what a menace her daughter was.

"You're gonna go even when you lose the race?" He said to her. Hiding his own smirk as he waited for her to snap at him.

He didn't have to wait long. Walking out from behind the changing wall to see Cherrie already glaring at him with her racing suit tied loosely around her hips.

"You mean when I win? And you lose right? I'll have a drink on you!" She told him arrogantly as she walked over to pick up her balaclava and helmet.

Their assistants ushering them along and to their cars.

Max just scoffed as he looked down at her with a glare . "I'm the leading driver Cherrie. You make space for me. How many times do I have to say it?" He bickered at her .

Cherrie, like usual, was having none of it. Shaking her head at him and giving him a little shove as they rounded the corner, aware of a cameraman now following them to get their pre-race reactions.

She pulled on her balaclava as she spoke "it doesn't matter who's the number one driver dickhead. It's matters who's faster. Which I am. You have to give me room then! Don't be a selfish moron max!" She snapped at him , ignoring the squeeze to her shoulder that her Assistant was giving her, telling her to behave .

But it wasn't the first time that the cameras had caught them arguing and it wouldn't be the last.

Max was scowling at her as his team started leading him away to his own car.

"I've already told you this a hundred times, I'm not doing it again. Just watch my back and do as you’re told!" That was completely the wrong thing to say to a woman who did the exact opposite of what he said.

Pulling a face at his back , she scoffed to herself at his cheek .

“Fucking bastard! He forgets that I’m a fucking world champion too! I didn't become that by being his bitch!" She muttered bitterly as she pulled on her helmet and lowered herself into her car.

Ignoring everyone around her as she tried to get herself into the zone. Ignoring the anger that Max's stubbornness had left her with.

She was going to win whether he liked it or not. She didn't pull back for anyone . Certainly not max.

They were nearing the end of the race when Cherrie finally managed to go from p6 to p3 in seconds , passing by the cars smoothly as she came wheel to wheel with Max's car.

Feeling excitement run through her as she realised thag she could do this. That she could push her car even further , she was the fastest one out of the two of them and she told her team so as she flicked on her radio.

"Max needs to let me pass! I can push! I'm faster than him!" She told them loudly , keeping her eye on the gap that was quickly getting closer and closer between her and her teammate .

Heart racing in her chest with adrenaline as they flew down the track, eyes widening as she realised that they were about to come into a sharp corner again. One that was only big enough for one car at a time.

"We have told him to make space. He's refusing to Cherrie. Just stay calm while we try to sort this out!"

She couldn't believe it. Fury flushing through her as she saw the distant close between their wheels. He was putting both of them in Danger as he refused to make a gap for her, instead closing it and nearly righting her off the track all together .

Managing to yank her wheel to keep her pace, the two cars racing side by side as the corner grew dangerously close.

She pressed the radio button that was linked between both of their cars so that max could hear her snap at him.

"I'm faster max! If you don't let me pass I'm gonna push the both of us off this fucking track!" She screamed at him. Struggling to stop their wheels from colliding as he moved his car even closer instead of letting her through.

She could hear their team frantically telling him to listen and pull back.

Then Max's pissed off voice reached her ears "I've fucking told you already! I'm not doing it! You need to pull back Cherrie!" He shouted back at her stubbornly .

Cherrie glanced behind her to see herself boxed in by two other cars. She couldn't have pulled back even if she tried otherwise she would end up causing them all to crash into a pile up.

Her heart was racing as she panicked "max I'm fucking serious! Let me pass now! There's two Ferrari's behind me!" She warned him.

Max wouldn't listen . Then the sharp corner approached and Cherrie inhaled deeply as she turned her car to try and take the wider line, hoping that max would realise what would happen if he didn't give her any space .

Praying that he would do the right thing.

He didn't.

Instead Cherrie could only yell out angry "fuck!" As she watched in almost slow motion as her front wheels hit the back of his own, sparks flying off the rubber as both of their cars were then flung at a ridiculous speed off the track.

Squeezing her eyes shut as she felt their cars hit against each other , flipping in the air a few times as she tried to keep her body safe.

Max's car went flying over her head as she ducked her head and pressed it against her wheel, thanking god for the halo above her as she felt his large wheel hit off the top of her car before crashing in front of her.

Her own car skidding until it hit the wall with a horrible crash, jostling her body as she tried to catch back her breath.

Staring in disbelief at Max's crashed car in front of her , quickly reassuring her team that she was alright over the radio. Before Turning off her engine and quickly removing the wheel as she hoisted her aching body up and out of the car.

"Fucking shit!" She snarled as she jumped down onto the grass, gritting her teeth in fury as she looked over at the other crashed redbull in front of her .

Watching with anger as max slowly pulled himself out as well, his head turning to look at her . Backing away a little , already knowing what was going to happen.

She completely lost her shit.

Yanking off her helmet furiously , she stalked towards him with a snarl. "What the fuck is wrong with you , you selfish bastard! You could have killed the both of us!" She screamed at him, eyes wide in disbelief at how stupid he had been.

Max lifted up his vistor and glared back at her as the safety car was deployed , glancing over the track to see pieces of their cars scattering the tarmac .

His chest tightening as it sunk in what he had just done, gritting his teeth as he looked back over at Cherrie and saw her holding her side in pain.

Shit.

"Cherrie-" he was quickly cut off before he could even attempt to make any excuses or apologise.

Rage was over taking her and all she saw was red "you stupid fucking idiot! We're both out now! God I could kill you!" She screamed at him before lifting up her helmet and throwing it at him at full force.

Hearing the Marshall's and the medics run over to them , trying to calm her down. She roughly shrugged off one of her hands from her shoulder , instead watching max flinch as he ducked to the side to avoid her helmet flying at him.

Watching it crash at his feet with a wince, he inhaled deeply . Guilt sinking low in his stomach as he watched her blink away tears of anger , being held back by two men as she tried to throw herself at him.

"I'm sorry! I wasn't thinking!" He blurted out honestly. Ashamed of himself for being so selfish and wanting to win. That he put both of their lives at risk.

Not knowing why he couldn't just let his pride go and let her pass him. He knew that she was faster then, that she could have pushed and easy won the race. Yet he had froze up and her screaming at him to move had went in one ear and out the other.

So certain that he could have got around that sharp corner and been p1 if he just kept her car behind him to defend off the other drivers.

How wrong he was.

Cherrie pulled off her gloves and hauled them at his head as well. Slapping the multiple peoples hands off her as she yanked herself from their grip, ignoring them shouting at her to calm down.

Instead she stomped over to max and shoved him so hard that he went flying down to the ground with a startled huff.

Looking down at him with a furious glare, feeling utterly betrayed by her own teammate who was supposed to have her back.

"Fuck you max!" She spat at him . Shaking her head at him in disappointment as she backed herself away from him before she actually did some damage and attacked him.

"I hope you're very happy with yourself! You fucked over not only me winning but you as well! We could have been on that podium together! We're supposed to be a fucking team remember?!" She shouted at him , this time letting herself be pulled away.

Not caring that the scene between them was playing out on the screen for all to see.

She couldn't give a shit.

Instead all she could think about was the fact that her daughter had no doubt just watched her and max crash badly . That if it wasn't for that halo above her head, her daughter would have lost her mother within seconds. Because of Max's stubbornness to win.

Max seemed to be realising the same thing as he pulled himself back to his feet and said her name remorsefully .

"Cherrie please-"

She just shook her head at him , muttering another quiet. "Fuck you." Before turning her back on him completely and letting herself be took to the medics to be checked out.

Leaving max to stare at where she had been stood with his shaking hands on his hips, pulling his visor back down over his eyes so that nobody could see him cry .

Hating himself for what he had stupidly done without thinking .

By the time he was about to go to bed and try to forget this terrible day that he had, his phone rang loudly making him curse out loud in annoyance.

Picking up his phone from his bedside table and checking the time, his frown deepening as he realised it was one o'clock in the morning , looking at the caller ID with confusion.

Wondering why Charles was calling him at such a ridiculous hour. Especially when the rest of the drivers knew better than to disturb him once he had entered the peace of his own home.

Answering the call and Putting the phone up to his ear with a huff .

“What do you want?" He snapped down the line impatiently .

Wanting nothing more than to close his eyes and sleep this whole mess he had created away. Unable to get the look of disappointment and betrayal that cherrie had given him out of his mind.

He was convinced that the guilt was going to haunt him forever at this rate.

Charles voice was clearly slurring as he answered him loudly over the music playing.

"'Max! I can't believe that you did that you naughty boy!" Charles tried to scold him in his drunken state , having re watched the shit show on his phone after it has been sent around the group chat.

Everybody talking about how max had fucked over his teammate again.

Max pinched the bridge of his nose , trying to push down his anger as he told himself that charles wouldn't dare to speak to him like this if he was sober.

In fact , none of them would.

Except Cherrie. She would argue with him wether she was completely smashed or not.

"Is that it? You've called to make me feel even worse about it than I already do?" He shot back to him , rubbing the tiredness from his eyes and glancing down at the photo frame on his nightstand.

Feeling his heart squeeze painfully in his chest as he looked at the photo of him, Cherrie and juniper on a teacup ride that they had hired for her birthday. It was a rare day that Cherrie had actually been smiling at him, her eyes bright and amused as he clung onto her with a laugh, little juniper in his lap squealing the whole ride.

It had been one of the best days in a long time and he couldn't have been more thankful for lando capturing the moment for him to keep forever.

Charles scoffed " yesssss mate. I just wanted to tell you what an idiot you are! You're lucky that pierre had been filling her up with vodka all night bedore she looked ready to plan your murder when she met up with us!" He rambled onto him, hiccuping occasionally .

Max scowled "pierre is with her?" He almost spat in distaste.

Knowing how close that the two were, even more so when they were drunk, it only made him hate it even more.

Not understanding why she could be the best of friends with every other driver but him.

He hated to admit it but he felt a slither of envy whenever the two were around each other. He hated how flirty and comfortable they were, he had often wondered to himself if they had something going on between them.

Having seen pierre over at her house far too many times for his liking.

Max had pettishly made sure that juniper knew that he was the better race driver out of the two. Having had a great laugh to himself when juniper had relayed what he told her right to pierre's  shocked face.

"You're a loser with a shit car." Juniper had told him confidently when he waved at her with a smile, a smile that quickly dropped at her words.

The three year old looking up at max for approval after she had said it. Getting a proud pat on the head from him while Cherrie scolded him for being so childish.

"Yes! They are dancing together! They are soooo drunk mate!" Charles giggled to him, unaware of the fury that he was making max feel .

Swinging his feet over the edge of his bed, he put his phone on loud speaker as he hurriedly pulled on some sweatpants and a old shirt , shoving crocs onto his feet quickly.

"Where the fuck are you guys? Don't let her do anything stupid!" He told Charles firmly as he ran down his stairs and picked up his car keys, bolting straight to his car.

Charles sounded amused "like run you off the track you mean? She can't do anything more stupid than you! And pierre-" he hiccuped again "is making her happy! You made her sad max! That's not nice!" His drunk ness made him barely make any sense as his voice kept cutting in and out.

"Is it club blue?" He demanded , ignoring everything he said as he sped down the highway With his lips pursed . Trying not to think of Cherrie and pierre together in any way.

Charles gasped "how did you know? Are you here too?!"

Max just rolled his eyes as he turned his car around and sped in the direction of the popular club with a huff.

"I'm going to be! What is she doing now?" He wanted to know. Knowing how she behaved whenever vodka was involved.

He just hoped that she hadn't had any tequila yet.

Tequila was the very reason that she had gotten pregnant with juniper in the first place.

The thought of her , pierre and a bottle of tequila between them almost made him gag in panic.

He heard Charles laughing loudly just as he pulled up outside the club. Quickly getting out the car and easily being let into the club once they recognised who he was.

"She's on the table dancing! Oh wow!" Charles gasped in amazement . "She's a really good dancer mate! Look at her hips .." he trailed off in awe.

Max ended the call and quickly shoved through the crowd as the voice of Ricky Martin assaulted his ears.

It not taking him long to spot Cherrie, he just had to follow every mans gaping mouth to the direction of the left .

His eyes going wide as he froze in his spot for a moment, watching as Cherrie pulled off her shirt and waved It in the air with a cheeky smirk on her face as she spun her hips around seductively , tilting her back till her hair cascaded down her back messily .

"I'll let her rough me up

'Til she knocks me out

'Cause she walks like she talks

And she talks like she walks

She bangs, she bangs" he just about heard her sing along : dropping down to her knees as she bounced her hip on the stage. The crowd cheering her on loudly.

Max swallowed thickly and quickly pushed through the crowd till he reached the group of drivers that were also watching her seduce the club.

Running her hands down her bare stomach , rolling her stomach and pushing out her breasts in the tiny bra she was wearing, pushing her already tiny skirt low on her hips as she danced like a stripper.

He gave the nearest driver a shove, it just fortunately happened to be pierre who looked over at him with a frown once he noticed it was him.

"Why the fuck did you let her get up there?!" He snapped at him. His annoyance only growing once how noticed Charles and lando were also staring open mouthed at Cherrie as she turned around, lifted up her skirt so that they could see her ass that was barely covered by lace panties . Dropping down and shaking her ass at them without a care in the world.

"Oh my god." Max muttered , eyes stuck to her ass for a moment before he snapped out of it. Pushing his way through the crowd till he got to the edge of the stage.

Glaring up at her as he shouted her name "Cherrie! Get down now!" He yelled up at her, taking a hold of her ankle before she could start twerking some more.

Her head snapped down to him in surprise , bedore she took one look at him and rolled her eyes.

"Nooooo! Go away you backstabber!" She whined bedore containing to sing along to the music blaring around the club. "I love this song!"

"She bangs, she bangs

Oh baby, when she moves, she moves

I go crazy 'cause she looks like a flower

But she stings like a bee

Like every girl in history!" She sang down to him with a smirk, putting her arms above her head and winding her body like Shakira.

He was reminded then of just why Cherrie was one of the most wanted women in the world.

Max felt like he was going to have a stroke when she suddenly dropped down to her knees in front of him, winking at him once she noticed that he couldn't take his eyes away from her .

Taking a deep breath , he shook his head rapidly to try and clear any dirty thoughts away.

Reminding himself that if he was getting turned on by her dancing like this , then so was everyone else in the club watching her .

Grimacing to himself at the reminder , he leant over the stage and locked his arms around her waist, pulling her down and off of it Before she could even blink.

"We're going home!" He declared to her . Ignoring the way that she was hitting at his arms as she struggled to get out of his hold.

Max just held onto her tighter as he began to carry her towards the exit. Ignoring the other drivers booing at him for ruining the show.

Cherrie slapped at his head , whining . "Nooo! I was having fun! Why did you have to ruin it!"

He huffed as he spun her around so that he was carrying on his hip like a child , giving a casual nod to the bouncer that was watching them in disbelief.

No doubt he hasn't seen a f1 driver being carried out by another f1 driver who has crashed them

Both off the track and got a helmet thrown at him by said woman on life tv before.

"If they wanted to watch porn then they could watch it on their phone! You didn't have to give them it for free!" He snapped at her as he placed her down in front of his car. Pulling the edge of her skirt down as far as it could go over her ass. Which wasn't very far at all.

Cherrie just groaned as he opened the passenger side down and placed his hand on top of her head , not so gently pushing her into the seat.

"You're just jealous that I can shake my hips! Your about as flexible as a table!" She threw back at him, crossing her arms over her chest with a annoyed pout as he slammed her door shut and got into the drivers seat.

Quickly starting up the car and getting them back on the highway, he sent her a unimpressed glance.

"Shut up. There's going to be videos of your ass all over the internet tomorrow now!" He told her unhappily as he took the lane that led back to her house instead of his.

Recalling what she had said about juniper being with a babysitter till she got back.

He wondered how the three year old felt after seeing her mother crash because of him on tv. The guilt nearly made him sick as he sped up the car, wanting to see her and reassure the kid that they were okay.

Cherrie huffed "there's going to be videos of you betraying me as well! I don't even want to look at you!" She then muttered some curse words under her breath at him. "You bastard!"

Max groaned as he glanced over at her , frowning in frustration.

"I know! I know! I said I was sorry! It was stupid of me to do that. I don't know why I did!" He told her , pissed off with himself for doing it.

Cherrie pulled her knees up to her chest, kicking off her heels and holding them in her hands instead.

Glancing over to her teammate and seeing the way his jaw was clenched , his cheeks red with shame and eyes so fucking sad as he looked back at her.

Feeling a little bit of her anger chip away once she noticed just as remorseful he looked.

"Cause you didn't want me to win. That was such a asshole move max." She sighed tiredly , body still aching despite the vodka numbing her a little.

He pulled into her driveway and turned off the car , not getting out just yet.

Instead he gently placed his hand on her thigh and squeezed to her her to look at him again , looking at her earnestly.

"Cherrie, I mean this with every part of me. I am sorry okay? I fucked up and you're right I did want to win. I took our competitiveness too far . And I am so fucking sorry. I wish I could change what I did and just let you pass instead , but I can't ." He sighed , swallowing thickly .

His eyes  scanning her pretty face for a reaction. Just needing her to believe him when he told her that he was sorry.

Cherrie looked back at him silently for a moment before rolling her eyes and admitting silent defeat.

"Okay." Was all she muttered before opening up the car door and sliding out.

Hearing max quickly do the same thing as he jogged back over to her side. Carefully taking her heels from her fingers and holding them in his hand instead.

Wrapping his other arm around her waist as she stumbled into his side , letting him guide her up to her door, seeing the lights still on.

"You forgive me?" He whispered to her hopefully as he pushed open the door and stepped in, pulling her into the hallway with him Bedore closing the door behind them with his foot.

Cherrie just leant her head against his arm with a tired yawn, nodding her head .

"Only if you let me pass next time. Otherwise I'll be the one to push you off the track. And I'll make sure it's worse this time." She threatened him sleepily just as her babysitter came down the hall.

Smiling at them as she put her coat on, nodding her head respectfully at them.

"She's not long nodded off in her bed. She was a little  worried but settled down after a while." She informed Cherrie quietly .

Making max wince with shame at the thought of juniper watching their crash like that. God knows what the poor kid had been thinking.

After Cherrie had paid her babysitter, max carefully lead her up the stairs to her room. His hands hovering over her incase she stumbled again.

"Max?" She called over to him quietly once she had thrown herself down on her bed, max putting her heels back in her closet before walking back over to her with a raise or his brow.

Humming to let her know he was listening as he picked up a packet of makeup wipes and sat down beside her .

Lifting the wipe up to her face , he almost froze as she whispered  a "why do you hate me so much?" To him.

Sounding genuinely upset at the thought of him hating her.

He swallowed past the sudden lump in his throat and started wiping her makeup from her face, gently sweeping the wipe against her skin as he wondered just how honest he should be with her.

But then he saw her sad eyes and down turned lips as she sagged against him, trusting him to take off her makeup and help her into bed in such a state.

He decided just tell the truth for once . "I pretended to hate you because I thought you hated me." He muttered quietly .

Pushing her messy hair from her face and pulling back the covers so he could tuck her in, his hand lingered by her cheek as he gently stroked her cheekbone with his fingertips .

Watching her eyes flutter tiredly as she gazed up at him with a frown , yawning again.

"But I never hated you. I just liked annoying you." She told him innocently as though the years of fighting between them was no big deal.

Max blinked down at her in mild amusement , shaking his head in disbelief .

"Fantastic. So all this time I thought you hated me you were just at winding  me up for your own amusement?" He stated. Pursing his lips at the infuriating woman in front of him.

She just smiled , nodded her head and let out a small giggle . Snugging her face into her pillow as she picked up his hand and kissed his knuckles like it was the most normal thing in the world.

Max felt like he was going to have a heart attack.

Inhaling sharply as her lips made contact with his skin, his face softening as she lifted up her other hand for him to do it back .

Maybe it was because she was drunk and being so uncharacteristically affectionate with him.

Or maybe it was because he loved her. But he gently took her hand and kissed each knuckle softly , letting out a sigh.

"You're such a pain in the ass." He muttered with a chuckle. Unbelievable. "You know that right?"

Cherrie just hummed , smiling up at him. "I know. But you love me though don't you?"

He didn't know how she knew it but she did. Her eyes told him the exact same thing.

Feeling his face heat up as he jokingly dropped her hand onto the bed and pinched her cheek, chuckling as he pushed himself up from the bed before he did something as stupid as kiss her.

"You're crazy cherrie." He just whispered to her as he pulled the blanket over her and flicked off the lamp, plunging the room into darkness so she couldn't see the smile that was taking over his face.

Walking over to the door, he paused as he heard her speak up again.

"You can make it up to me ya know.. might help me forgive you quicker." She told him quietly  , already half asleep.

He smiled , shaking his head fondly.

“Yeah? How can I make it up to you?" He wanted to know .

Already planning on making it up to her as soon as she was sober again.

"You can take me on a date and kiss it better." She told him in a whisper .

Max blushed. Laughing underneath his breath as he pulled open her bedroom door to leave.

"Sounds good. " was all he answered to her, smiling to himself contently .

“Sweet dreams Cherrie." He said before closing the door behind him.

Letting himself breathe again for a moment as he rubbed his hands over his face to try and sort himself out before he walked over to the room opposite Cherrie, smiling at the hand drawn picture of a castle that juniper had drawn being stuck on her door.

Gently pushing open the door he made his way inside , smiling once he made eye contact with the three year old that was already wide awake , seemingly waiting for someone to talk to her.

"Hey." He breathed out happily as he knelt down beside her bed, giving her his hand . "Hi."

Juniper grabbed ahold of his fingers and giggled , pulling at his hand happily.

"Maxi.." she cooed at him , wiggling on her back as she pulled at her blanket with her other hand so it covered her properly .

"You went vrooommmm!" She mimicked two cars crashing together with her hands, looking up at him with wide eyes. Clearly worried.

Max sighed and smiled at her sadly . "I know. Looked bad huh?" He muttered as he grabbed the beanie chair from the corner of her room and dragged it over to the side of her bed so he could still reach her.

Laying down on it and getting comfortable , he gave her back his hand to hold through the gaps of her bed. Juniper quickly latching on as her tiny hand clung onto him again.

"Hurt?" She asked him cutely, concerned.

Max let out a small laugh when she suddenly picked up one of her teddy's and threw it at his face.

Picking up the bright pink fuzzy bear and tucking it underneath his arm to make her happy . He gently squeezed her fingers three times.

"No. We're okay juney. Mommy is okay too." He comforted her quietly . Turning on his side so that he could see her cute little face properly .

She was an exact copy of Cherrie , that he glad for. They had the same soft button nose and long lashes, the same pouty lips and big judgey eyes.

It was too much for his heart to handle.

How was he supposed to just not fall in love with the two of them? Cherrie made him feel alive , she made his heart sing.

And juniper made him happy. The way she toddled around after him and looked up to him. Always repeating whatever words he said and looking up to him for approval afterwords .

He had watched her grow up from a barely one year old who cried at every little noise , to a stubborn three year old girl who was as sassy and sarcastic as her mother. The both of them not letting anyone get anyway with anything.

And now he couldn't imagine a life without them in it.

"I'm gonna marry your mommy one day." He found himself telling the toddler honestly .

Already planning out their future together. Smiling to himself at the thought of Cherrie in a wedding dress, no doubt complaining that it wasn't fair that he got a suit with pockets while she had to shove everything in her bra.

Maybe they'd have a baby like juniper one day too. One that was biologically his. One that juniper could be a big sister to.

That would be the dream. He sighed longingly .

Juniper just giggled "like prince and princess?"

Max laughed "like king and queen. You'll be the princess juney. You can wear that big tiara you like. Or maybe I'll get you a real one." He mused.

The three year old gasped excitedly . "Yay! Are you gonna marry mommy tomorrow?" She asked him impatiently. blinking her big eyes at him happily.

Max smiled , his chest warming . "I'm gonna take your mommy on a date tomorrow. Maybe after the third date. If it goes well." He joked , smiling at her in amusement .

Despite not knowing why he was laughing, juniper just squeezed his hand, happy because he was happy.

"Ok. Can I come?"

"On the date?" He grinned.

She nodded her tiny head. "Yup."

He chuckled "sure. Where should we take mommy?"

She lit up "Disneyland!"

Max smirked . Eyeing the toddler in amusement.

"Maybe. I was thinking maybe a picnic date or something more romantic." He replied. His mind racing with ideas.

There was a pause before "and Disneyland. We could have a picnic at Disneyland." She insisted having been bugging the two of them to go for ages.

Max just smiled , his heart so full of love for the two of them. "And Disneyland." He agreed , laughing when she clapped her hands excitedly .

Knowing that Cherrie was probably going to kill him for agreeing . Having told him once that Disneyland was a place of her nightmares.

But how was he supposed to say no to that cute little face? He wasn't that cruel.

Already planning on getting them a day pass at the Paris park. Then he could let his assistant babysit juniper on the night while he took Cherrie out for a romantic dinner in the city of love.

It was a solid plan.

He had to start making it up to her somehow and what better place to do that than in Paris?

[omamorens]

Excuse me, I know it’s been a while since fantasy high junior year, but I was wondering if you had any thoughts or head cannons on Adaine and Oisín as academic rivals in senior year?

OH I HAVE LOTS OF THOUGHTS ABOUT THEM the lack of content has not stopped my brainrot (a curse or a blessing…. who can tell) but senior high inkblade thoughts coming right up

Nothing beats forced proximity. Wizard classes are notorious for giving out group tasks to mitigate the stereotype of wizard shut-ins

General student population has not taken kindly to TRG’s return… and they’re still pretty much approached with caution

Not TBK though. they dont gaf bout these kids

Especially not Adaine.

So if she happens to be paired/grouped with Oisin Hakinvar for a lot of the projects, she just learns to work with him in relative peace.

���Peace” being doing most of the work herself because duh. Who else can do anything better than she does?

But Adaine’s idea of “peace” hurts Oisin’s draconian sense of pride.

The second time it happens, Oisin finally gets the sense to tell her to knock out of it and include him in the work.

“Why? You’re already getting a free pass because of me. Just say your thanks and take it.”

“This free pass is gonna bite me in the ass.”

“You think I’ll snitch?”

“I just don’t like owing you anything.”

Their argument quickly escalates until the threats of violence have reached their wizard teacher’s radar.

Which was perfect. Now Adaine can actually complain and have her partner changed without whining or sounding like she was being difficult.

Too bad for her…

“I can’t do that, Miss Abernant. Mr. Hakinvar is the only one with comparable capabilities as you that if anyone else were paired with you, it would almost be like handing them a free pass.”

There was a compliment there somewhere but Adaine cannot be bothered to dig for it. Not when she was being compared to Oisin Hakinvar of all people.

In the end, Adaine didn’t get a change of partner and was left to deal with Oisin on her own.

Surprisingly, he was not that difficult to deal with. Misgivings aside, Oisin had common sense and worked on his parts well enough that Adaine had no problem with their output.

Doesn’t mean she won’t complain though.

This rivalry was a battle of wits mostly— who could create the most efficient spell? who could cast more practically? who wrote glyphs more intricately?

Wizard classes were also deeply twined together that it was hard not so be in the same class despite having different wizarding schools.

Which also presented arguments in theory and the nature of magic as they see and interact with it in their perspective.

In short, Oisin Hakinvar was a fucking challenge.

When you’re Adaine Abernant, you’re used to being the smartest person in the room.

Sure her friends were smart in their own ways too (Riz was inquisitively smart, Gorgug practically smart, and all her other friends were brilliantly talented), but all of them mostly did not care to have the scholarly aptitude and arcane awareness to actually challenge Adaine.

And honestly? Being the smartest person in the room was kind of dull.

Oisin just had to exist and change that, and now Adaine is both challenged, uncharistically motivated, and driven to come out as the better wizard.

Being the Elven Oracle does not matter when your opponent is an annoying dragonborn who only had comparable capabilities as you do after he killed some rats—

It was infuriating, honestly insulting, and most of all untrue.

Adaine will just have to prove it to everyone when she eventually graduates top of the wizarding class.

That will happen after she tackles the mysteries surrounding her senior year first because Of Course something had to go wrong and it was up to the Bad Kids to actually do anything about it.

No, she will not be distracted by this. She can solve a mystery AND be academically competent. Who do you take her for?

Oisin will have to pry the top spot from her cold, dead hands—

in my head, theres another pov of this from oisin’s perspective but this has gotten too long and i have uni to tackle first. i hope you enjoyed this hcs because i truly have daydreamed inkblade senior year in its full glory in my head at this point.

[entering--hyperspace]

Okay so Imagine youre a Legion charr right. You feel deeply in your soul you were born with gentle hands, yet you are made to be a soldier and take orders. You cannot bring yourself to take lives, you have too much love for life, too much respect for the dead, you spent your entire life never moving up in ranking due to this, it goes against everything you were taught and made to believe. Imagine you crave a life where you can feel the sun on your fur as you live a life of peace, where you can settle down with a loved one and watch your children grow. This will never happen, your legion doesnt allow this to happen. Yet in some good turn of fate, you start crawling up in society, a chance meeting, you hold fast to your beliefs and your life takes you across the world. On your journey youre told you were chosen to be the champion of an unborn champion. Chosen? You would think it should be the pact commander chosen, right? You did not have the same glory, maybe someone else, in comparison you have very little to your name. But no, its you. Okay.

So time goes on, eventually this egg is ready to hatch, and its only just before do you truly understand what this means. You have to raise her, you have to teach her right from wrong, good and evil, everything in between. She has to know how to protect herself, she has to trust you. Trust. You remember every detail of her hatching, you remember you knew who she was as if the thought had been with you your entire life. Theres a tiny voice in your head that asks, is this what being a parent is? And then you panic. You always wanted this, but over the years your gentle hands became calloused from war and conflict. You never knew your own parents, you were never expect to become one, battle and experiences raises your kind, not the joyous smiles of a mother or father, not their encouraging words and safety. And another thing. She is a dragon, the fate of the world depends on this, your ability to guide her correctly youre told. She hatches and the weight of what that means melts away in an instant. She looks at you and your world shifts, you see her take in the world for the first time, you see her look to you as if her trust in you was something she was born with. You catch her when she falls, you hold her as she sleeps. You think to yourself, you don't know if you could be a champion to a dragon, but in that moment youre certain, more certain than you've been about anything youre entire life...you could be her father.

[saiintvalentiine]

hey. hey saiint. do you remember your post abt watchers from like, a day ago. how they could take an 'empty' clone and use it as a vessel or whatever. so. two things abt that.

a) the idea of watchers in kww collab Fascinates me deeply and now theres an au in the back of my head where wato becomes a watcher. its fascinating. dont mind me i think about watchers too much okay

b) do you. have you considered voidfies.

this ominous fucker that wato got the mask from. completely void, has the texturing of wifies skin and the omz mask, shows up in a couple of the kww collab videos? have you thought abt them? bcs. idk i think this could be relevant to the idea of watchers or well distant gods or whatever. bcs look !! empty ominous weird guy who is prolly A Wifies is right here !!!!!

JUST THOUGHT IT MIGHT BE A FUN IDEA !!! idk pls ignore this if i said anth wrong lmao

welcome welcome lime !!! all kinds of fun ideas r always welcome in my inbox never worry !!! I luv yapping 💜💙 The post in question for those who don't know: watchers using clonefies as a puppet/vessel!

Oh Voidfies my deeply belothed. Love hate relationship with that wretched thing. What is it. What does it do. Why is it in my house. Wato got the mask from it, but it also seemingly took the mask back as well, and then seemingly did this several times ? As in how was Wato functioning seemingly normally when not in the Evilfies server, normally enough that Ken asks them for the IP and doesn't sense anything wrong with her? Idk if that makes sense. gyaru peace sign this will haunt me forever and that's why all I write is post canon.

There's two ways I'm imagining Voidfies in this au now that we're talking abt it: one is that it is straight up just a puppet/vessel that's even further stripped down, and depending on your take on the Omz mask, the mask is either what helps the watchers control it, or the Omz mask is parasitic in some way and isn't of watcher origins.

Another take on it that I'm really enjoying is the idea that 1, the clones are at least partially made of void magic, and 2 the Omz mask may have started as a watcher tool but something broke/severed it's connection and now it's basically a rogue entity. So what if, in the absence of a proper vessel, the Omz mask. . . picks the other clones for parts, so to speak, and created Voidfies out of the void imbued within them, which I mentioned here just really briefly in the end. It'd be a body that wouldn't fight back or have much sentience, the mask could do whatever. Without it's main source of power, I wonder what the mask does to keep itself alive. . . ?

so many fun thoughts here to think of........... i hope this was interesting ! Dunno if this is where you thought it'd go djfhgkdjhfg

[rpreaperperson]

6: Grumpy Claw

For more : Masterlist

Warning: Mean Ghost...dont he always

Cheeks puffed, eyebrows furrowing, mouth upside down, eyes glaring at certain someone

And that someone ... is the one who push her down the river when they tried to escape from the mercenaries to the river

Her fluffy tail tapping, each time its tapping the person who makes her anger flinch 

“Kitty...c’mon you know he didn’t mean it, he just doesn't want you to get hurt..” Soap coax her to forgive whatever the culprit had done to her

 “psst, what's wrong with her?” Grave whisper at Soap

“uhh well...”.

.

They’re moving on the white building that kept Hassan....well supposed to anyway, all they got a cartel members and no signs of Hassan

But Claw can still smell Hassan around the room as she sniff around the room.

“They must’ve moved him” her ears twitching at the rough voice

“When?”Soap ask

“not long Master, not to mention theres his flag, must I say your intel’s perfect Master Ale” her finger tracing the flag as she glance at Alejandro, nodded in gratidute Alejandro smiled at her

But then a sound of rumbling alert her,and the tense of her body making Ghost alert too

He glancing out the window

“What is it?”

“The army”

“We got reinforments”

“Negative” Claw snapped her head at Alejandro

“They’re enemies?! But..why?! I thought the army –“ Claw shriek ears flatting against her head in fear

“Calm down gatita, These are troops are paid by the cartel. They’re helping the cartel protect Hassan” hearing this making her ease a little bit

“Mutiple vehicles...troop transports. Light armor”

“Hold fire, let them get close” Claw mounting her gun rushing into Soap side, her belly full of adrenaline glancing at each of her Masters

‘So...this is war..although I already feeled one..but why is this one feels different?’

“Weapons free!!”

“Nya?!” She immediately duck when a bullet came through her, annoyed Claw throwing her grenade

“Eat this! KABOOM!”

“Good girl!” Alejandro praise, Clam beamed at the praise

Then the enemy threw a tear gas, yellow gas spread the room hands covering noses and mouths as they started coughing

Especially Claw who was deeply sensitive with her nose, ear flatting she wobbled as Soap grab her back collar, without word he held her close and jumped out the window along with the others 

“Ya okay Lass?” 

“Y-yes Master..” she smile assure him, Soap as usual rubbing her soft hair 

Alejandro who saw Soap’s affection to Claw became a little bit envy of Soap

“Down the hill! We'll lose them in the mountains! Fan out and stay close” following the Colonel order they retreat down to the hill

.

Claw slit eyes scanning around the mountain as she pointed her gun, ear’s twitching wildly 

“Save your ammo Cl-- “her eyes caught something and she lauches her bullet pass one of the soldier head Rodriguez, she shot a sniper who had been aimed them from the ledge

“YEAH! Did you see it? Ma-” Ghost stare stabbed through her skull, a silent scold treatment 

Her ear flopped into her head

“Good shot Claw!” then she beamed at the praises from Alejandro

.

“Ahh so I’ve heard she’s really a good shooter” Grave glance at Claw who still glaring at the person

“And I so proud of her...Anyway” 

.

“You’ve lead us to dead end mate!” nowhere else to go but to jump to the river

“W-we jump from here?” Claw squeked holding her gun close

“Don’t lose your weapon!” Alejandro jumped followed with Rodriguez

“Jump Claw!”

“I-I think -- “

“Bloody Hell .Just.GO!!” Ghost shoved her back, Soap widen his eyes as Claw falling into the river

“NYAAAAAA!!! I HATE YOUUUU MAS--”

Splashh!

.

“Ghost pushed her into the river and she mad at him?”

“more or less, but can’t say he doesn’t deserve it”

“Why?”

“eh..He’s been kinda mean to her today” rubbing under her neck Soap able to making Claw purring in delight

“Master..” the hybrid tugging his shirt

“mm?”

“Am I a bad girl?” eyes went teary as she looked upon his

“Nahhh why you think of that?? LT just havin another grouchy mood, ain’t that right  L.T?!”

“if she could be more obedient then maybe, I will not be this grouchy” Ghost snap at Soap

“W-woah woah hold it there Ghost..calm down” Soap putting his hand up, Grave raising his eyebrow surprised to saw the calm lieutenant be this snappy

“M-master...why did you so meann, I’ll do everything you told me...”

“No!, no you dont..” He pointed his finger at her 

Body trembling irrated , her eyes became teary

“FINE! I HATE YOU MASTER!! I WILL ASK MISS LASWEL TO BE MOVED ANOTHER TEAM!!”

Soap and Ghost stood there in shock 

“.....join me instead?” ask Graves patting her shoulder

“Can I?!

“Yep, ‘sides most of the boys is a cat person sooo..yeah they would be delighted” he smirk as Graves rubbing between her ears

“NO! join me instead Claw! I will give you many snacks as many as you wants!” suddenly Alejandro pop up out of nowhere with Rudy beside him deadpan 

“SNACKS?!” Graves ‘tsk’ing 

“Claw...please you dont have to..” Soaps plead became muted on Claw ears

Her attention completely focused on Alejandro

 then he glared at Ghost 

“....Shit” for the first time Ghost got scolded by Soap

Taglist:  @lilpothoscuttings  @kaoyamamegami

[turnin9pag3]

sigh.

i think im a james potter kinnie in the most shameful way possible because yes i relate to being social and having lots of friends but more than that i relate to feeling like you’re constantly doing either too much or not enough and people lose interest in me and i feel like shit because what did i fuck up but then i go and loose interest when i know its not that persons fault i just cant help myself but to hate everyone because i hate myself. and like james im too loud all the time so much so that when i finally decide to be quiet i have people shoving their concerns down my throat and i dont know how to appreciate it when all i want is to be left alone. lately ive been feeling like there something misplaced in me because all i want is to spend my last week of school with my friends and be happy and enjoy my time but all i can think about is i dont want to be here and i dont want to be touched and i dont want to see these people because these people keep talking and my head hurts and my eyes hurt and im feeling dizzy and none of this looks real anymore and im not sure what to do with myself anymore. and i would hate to hurt their feelings because its truly not their fault but like i said theres something wrong with me. i think im just a rotten soul and im fucked up in way unknown to most. as james would, i feel judged after everything i say and i feel ridiculed for every decision i make and i feel like they dont want to listen to me at all they just keep me around to have someone for themselves and a part of me knows thats not true but the larger part of me wont let me fully believe that. and i feel like james in the way i dont know how to do anything casually and i love with my entire soul but i hate with my entire soul too and when im in something im fully in. and its such a fault to have because i like people more than people like me all i just end up hurting myself because as much as i tell myself im not i think i still like that one guy from august and my miss my best friend when i cant call her that anymore and the girl ive known since 2nd grade is barley answering my texts and summer is coming i feel like everyone is going to forget about me and what if i forget about everyone and i dont want to be forgotten. and i feel like james because i feel overbearing when i ask to hang out with people and annoying. and i feel like im being made fun of every time i speak and i have to pretend that it doesnt bother me but it does. and im like james because all i want is someone to talk to and thatll listen to me but i know how hard it is to stay attentive when i talk because i talk so much about stuff no one cares about and i try to hide it but it hurts more than id like to admit because everyone cares about what they have to say and i sit and i listen but when i talk they leave the room or change the topic or turn up the music or outright tell me they dont care. joke or not it hurts. like james i spent most of my childhood being told im too loud or too intense or talk too much or too chaotic or too dramatic or talk too fast and like james i think no matter how much confidence i fein in my teen years ill never grow away from the 6 year old girl that everyone called a psycho because she had emotions too big that she didnt know how to deal with yet and they wernt her fault. it wasnt her fault she got her dads anger issues and tendencies to scream or her mothers ability to feel everything twice as strong as she should. and now im 15 and its still not my fault but ive suppressed it so far im not 100% sure how to feel that deeply anymore.

[weirdestcornelius]

fine i will not shut up ok

i kinda like sly x scrap, i just think of a lot of scenarios between them

imagine if scrap gets to know sly better, and realizes what she is suffering because of her family bullshit, mostly eve fucking her life and self-streem. of course sly cannot say anything, but scrap cannot see eve with the same eyes now that he knows she is a shitty person

theres a lot happening inside of slys head, and i dont think she is capable of explaining without the fear of being laugh at. me thinks scrap would say something like

"why do you let her hurt you this way?"

scrap would see what truly eve is causing with her trauma, being just an asshole without consequences to a deeply depressed person

im laughing so damn hard becausd the shipname would be "slap", or "paperart"

I never thought of this. But it would be so interesting actually???

Scrap just believes that Eve can do no wrong until he meets Sly and learns what squeak does to fen by reading her mind. Imagine the drama that would come from that. That would actually be an interesting character arc oh my.

[chaos-grimlin]

Intro: No one truly knows what happened that night in Woodsboro, California. All the public knows was that two teenage boys, Billy Loomis and Stu Macher, went crazy. That the boys killed with no motive, that it was a case of crazy and peer pressure. Sidney Prescott, the "girlfriend" of Billy Loomis,Y/n L/n, the girl both boys were deeply obsessed with, and Gale weathers, a news reporter, where 3 of 5 witnesses that were willing to talk and tell their sides of the story to the public while Dewy Riley, the deputy sheriff of woodsboro, and tennager Randy Meeks refused to talk to law enforcements at the time. All the stories told to law enforcement seem to differ from person to person, but...in this tale, we will focus on Y/n, the obsessions, side of the story...

Marked( Poly! Billy Loomis and Stu macher x reader)

Word count: 1630

Chapter 7- Blood and Organs

^^^3rd still with Casey^^^

"Jason didnt show up till the squeal!" The man hissed out. "Now...im afraid that was a wrong answer" he said, going back to talking calmly.

"You...you tricked me" Casey muttered under her breath as she hung her head low.

"Lucky for you theres a bonus question"

Casey's head popped up as he said that.. Maybe Steve wouldn't die.. Maybe shed get to run out there pull the tape off of him and kiss and hug him..

But she knew that her wish was unlikely..

"But... Poor Steve.. Im afraid hes out" the man said, crushing Casey's already broken heart with those words.

Casey rushed to the patio door just in time to hear Steves muffled screams and a sickly sound of something spilling onto the floor.

Casey reached out her shaky hand and turned on tje patio lights just in time to see Steves head fall back and to see his organs slip out of his body and dangle from his gut.

Casey felt her body grow weak. All she felt was sadness and hatred for both herself and the man over the phone.

She wanted to do nothing but kick his ass, beat the man to a pulp and make his life a living hell.

Casey slid down the wall and moved back, she felt weak and angry, both emotions overwhelming her poor mind.

"Hey! Were not done yet!" The man over the phone growled out.

"Final question....are you ready?" He asked as Casey pressed the phone slowly against her ear.

Casey felt like giving up..she had already lost Steve...

"Please...please... Leave me alone...please" Casey begged through pointless sobs.

"Answer the question and i will" he said, a flirty yet evil tone returning to his harsh voice.

"What door am I at?" The man asked.

Casey cried more, her bottom lip quivering as her fingers grasped the phone tightly.

"There are two main doors in your house...the front door and the patio door..if you answer correctly you live"

Casey knew he was near..

He was close..

She could feel him watching her..

His eyes graced over her body and her saddened fearful face..

That face made the mans heart lurch with excitement as he licked his lips behind his mask, he couldn't wait to see what her insides look like spilled all over the grass..

"Dont do this.." Casey whispered.. The begging just made him want to kill her even more..

"I cant...i won't" she cried

"Your call" he purred.

Casey had a feeling... A feeling in her gut...

She peared around the corner just in time to see jer patio window smash open and a chair come crashing through.

Casey jumped up, her flight or fight sences kicked in, adrenalin pumped through her veins and she rushed passed the window and started to run..

Casey ran through the kitchen, smoke from the burning popcorn filled the air and burned her eyes, clouding her vision.

Casey grabbed a kitchen knife as she slowed down, she waiting as she gripped the knife in one hand and the phone in the other.

She walked closer to her window. At this point she knew someone was in her house and she needed to get out as quick as possible..

Casey opened her back door slowly, careful not to make a sound.

She slowly shut the door yet it made a loud click.

Casey's breath hitched in her throat as she stumbled and pressed her back firmly against the wall.

Casey was close to hyperventilating as she took in deep breaths, trying to settle herself down so maybe the mam wouldn't hear the thump of her heart..

Casey looked back into her house, her eyes fluttering back and fourth, trying to locate the murder in her house.

Then..she saw him..his tall lanky body covered in a black hooded outfit and a white mask covering his face, as soon as she saw him he rushed across the room, knife in hand.

Casey quickly pushed herself back flush against the wall, her shaky hand gripping the knife ever so tightly.

Casey looked out in the distance and she saw headlight....Y/n...

Casey didn't want her bestfriend to die like her boyfriend..but...just maybe

.. Y/n could save her...

Casey weighed her odds, looking back into the house and seeing the man creep around, looking for her...then she looked at the rapidly approaching car lights.

Casey dropped to her knees and quickly crawled passed the big window.

She saw y/ns car pull up into the path leading to her house.

Casey felt a ping of hope ignite in her heart.

Casey stopped crawling and looked back into the window only to see the masked man staring right at her.

"Aha!" The man said behind the glass

Casey screamed as the man punched through the glass and grabbed Casey's wrist tightly.

Casey punched the man in the face with the phone, causing him to unhand her and once he did.. Casey ran.

Casey ran along the sides of her house.. Stopping once she saw Steves lifeless body.

Casey hated seeing her boyfriend lifeless with his organs spilling and hitting the floor with a gut wrenching wet sound.

Casey kept running before her body wouldn't let her.

She was so close...

So close..

But the man jumped from the window and tackled Casey down to the ground.

Casey cried and groaned before pushing the man off of her.

Casey started running again, her legs moving as fast as they would let her.. But he caught up to her and clasped his clothed hand around her mouth and stabbing Casey in the shoulder.

Casey's breath hitched as pain flew through her body. Blood oozed from the wound as pain worse then she could have imagined pulsed through her.

The man pushed Casey down with a laugh.

Casey's whined as her fingers touched the blood that poured from her shoulder she looked at the wound as her breathing came out in sharp gasps and ecstatic cries.

The man crouched down onto Casey's torso and pressed the knife teasingly agaisnt her neck as giggles erupted from him..but... Casey knocked the knife away and the man replaced his knife with his hand.

His lanky fingers clasped around her neck and squeezed her neck tightly, cutting off her air flow.

The man choked Casey till she lifted her leg and kneed him harshly off of her.

Casey gasped for air as she laid there and heard Y/n hop out of her car. Casey heard Y/n hum to herself as she walked.

Casey fought to get up and once she did she stumbled and gasped for air, she tried to call for Y/n but her vocal cords were damaged from all the screaming and crying.

Casey saw Y/n skip up to the door, dancing to herself and humming with a sway in her hips.

Casey called out to her but her voice was barely over a whisper.

Y/n walked up to the door and knocked and to her surprise..the door pushed open.

Y/n knitted her brows togeather and stepped inside.. Only to see smoke filling the air and windows smashed. "What the hell?!" Y/n said with a cough as her eyes started to water.

Casey fell to the ground the the man was instantly on top of her

Casey reached her hand up and pulled the mask off the man and looked into his eyes as he pushed the knife into her chest.

"Casey?!" Y/n screeched out as she walked into the kitchen and saw the popcorn was on fire.

Y/ns eyes went wide as she quickly yanked the popcorn off of the stove and quickly put it out.

"Casey?! CASEY?!" Y/n screamed as she kept rushing through the house, her fear and worry getting worse as she didn't see Casey nor Steve anywhere..

"WHERE ARE YOU?!" Y/n screamed out, goosebumps rising on her skin.

Y/n felt dread as she saw the patio door wide open.

Y/n quickly rushed out the patio door only to be met with the sight of Casey's boyfriend..

Y/ns hand flew up to her mouth as her throat tightened.. A feeling or dreed and guilt flooded her body..

She saw Steve sitting there.. Lifeless...

Y/n forced herself to look away and when she did...she saw Casey's body.. Handing from a tree with her stomach cut open and her organs showing.

Y/n felt her whole world crumble around her.. Her breath hitched in her throat and tears flooded her eyes.

Y/n felt so much guilt flush over her... Its her fault..

Y/n rushed over to the tree were Casey's body was hanging.

"CASEY NO! NO! NO CASEY!!" Y/n screamed out as she pulled Casey's down.

Y/n felt to the grass, cradling Casey's body in her arms. "No..no..no!" She repeated.

Y/ns hands became soaked with Casey's blood as her organs got on Y/ns bare legs.

Y/n cried hard... As she held Casey's body..

She couldn't let her go..

She didn't want to believe ber best friend was laying in her lap.. Gutted like a fish..

Y/ns looked at Casey's face and closed Casey's lifeless eyes with her bloody fingers.

"Im so sorry..im sorry its my fault.." Y/n screamed out, she screamed loud enough all of Woodsboro could have heard her....

Y/n was hyperventilating as tears poured down her cheeks and down her neck. Y/n let out cried and more crys even as she grabbes her phone from her pocket and dialed 911.......

If only she had gotten there sooner.....

[the-s1lly-corner]

Can I get Centipedes x Ragatha? (it’s a joke)

Ragatha and centipedes

jokes on you im going to entertain this because im feeling a little silly. going to be all over the place since its just a bunch of random stuff tying in with the general centipede idea future admin here VV did not think i would need to put a cw on this but this genuinely made me feel bluuuuuugh and yucky so uh. CW on talk about bugs and vague talk of infestations because the admin tried to make a hc on why ragatha is scared of centipedes in particular (admin realizes their phobia of bugs is worse than they thought by the end of writing it they just thought they had arachnophobia LMAO) not even going to bother to tag this

i think its centipedes specifically that ragatha doesnt like. shes okay with spiders, shes fine with flies, hell shes okay witih silverfish (which arguably are just as gross if not grosser than centipedes). its something about centipedes in specific she hates. maybe its the legs. its gotta be the legs

or maybe theres something else? honestly i can see her getting her little fear of the things from a prank by jax gone terribly wrong, or perhaps even an in house adventure

or maybe she experienced something with them in her real life that, despite her losing her memories, she fears the bug down to her very core. something that shook her so deeply, engraining itself into her psyche, enough to carry on even after losing everything that once made her her when she put on the headset

okay jokes aside, originally i was going to go on a tangent about how that maybe her fear came from a really bad IHA.. but now that i think about it, the idea of her going through something in her real life makes more sense. plus as much as i write about jax putting centipedes in her room i dont think he actually did... but what i have cooking in my brain far exceeds the cruelty jax would dare dish out

i dont know about you but infestations can quickly instill a fear in you. i would know personally because when i was younger roaches and silverfish were common in my house hold, especially during wetter times of the year. also crickets. and woop the admin hates all three of those bugs, deeply. can you imagine going into the bathroom as a small child, only to get up and see a roach as big as your hand just chilling in the toilet bowl. do you know what that does to a person

cue that one post where op said they were taking a dump and they poked a weird spot on their wall only to watch in horror as a hoard of silverfish started spilling out of it

genuine fear of mine i hate silverfish kid me used to avoid the bathroom because of them

so anyways with the power of my self projection, im going to apply the same idea to ragatha. maybe she lived somewhere where centipedes were common. sure they might not have been the huge gnarly ones that we all think of when we hear about these things, but i think even the smaller ones would do her in after enough time. could be a large amount of house centipedes but as stated above, it would probably drive you insane after you see enough of them for long enough

shrugs

okay psychological torment aside i dont think theres really any curing her fear if we're following this hc, like maybe you can help her build a tolerance to having them around but to actually get rid of it fully? yeah no thats going to take a lot more than you can give her in the digital circus

will NOT pick up a centipede you try to get her to hold, you could have the best intensions and it can be the cutest one ever in existence

i was going to add a lot more to this post and make this comically long but my skin is crawling (pun intended) at the images ive just put into my head. genuinely feel yucky inside

[limeade-l3sbian]

u can publish this if u want but anyway i have this character i wrote for a short story and her names trinity and she is so. theres something so deeply wrong with her. she gets fixated rlly intensely on random projects and will devote everything to them but when its time to finish she Cannot bring herself to end it. the idea of the end is simultaneously what drives her and is her biggest fear. she whacked her childhood friend over the head with a stick because they were building a dam in the creek together and her friend almost finished it. she got engaged and then spent months "planning" the wedding to avoid actually setting a date. she tried to kill herself and couldn't do it and ended up going on a 2am walk in the road instead, for six hours because she couldn't make herself go back home. she doesnt understand social cues shes selfish she loves beavers and she has no friends in the whole wide world. <3

I'd say give her a happy ending, but yeah.

[alstroemerian-dragon]

ouuuuhhh so ive been attempting for a hot minute to associate this particular san fermin song w kuzuhina because i really like the vibes but i couldnt. find the bit. yknow the Bit. the Nugget.

finally found it.

(under the cut. warning: this is an au ramble and it gets Long)

first off:

okay. the au:

these two kids live in a small town. maybe not super rural, and not right by the big city, but its your typical smaller japanese suburb. neither of them are happy. theyre maybe ten or eleven, but one of them lives in an upper class, extremely controlling household, one where his parents constantly fight, and hes been subjected to at least some level of abuse. he also knows theres something wrong with him, something that makes him different from even his peers, though he cant quite see what it is yet. the other is alone, distant from his parents, distant from his peers, deeply depressed and unaware that hes even himself.

but theyre friends. in some ways, theyre all the other has in this fucked up place, and a majority of their happiest memories are with each other. they make a promise, one night, that someday, when theyre a bit older, theyll run away together. theyll escape this terrible town and theyll travel the world and theyll be together, and everything will be okay.

and then they grow up.

theyre still friends. but now hajime has figured out, to an extent, who he is, started at least socially transitioning as they get into high school. they make other friends, outside of fuyuhiko’s odd relationship with peko (the daughter of one of their family’s servants), find people to connect with. hajime reaches out, gets a crush on chiaki that she returns, maybe they even start dating. he changes.

and fuyuhiko… doesnt.

maybe hes too stubborn, maybe hes been burned too many times, maybe hes just too poisoned by his parents’ rhetoric. but he wont, or maybe cant, step too far outside of the box hes placed himself in. he watches hajime drift, feels panic inside, doesnt know how to fix it. they argue. hajime worries. fuyuhiko shrugs it off.

when theyre seventeen, fuyuhiko’s dad finds out hes been fooling around with other boys. hiding magazines, clearing his search history of anything incriminating. the confrontation doesnt go well.

he has to get out. its the end of the line, at this point. fuyuhiko has to get out. he packs, he plans, he prepares. he waits just long enough to knock on hajimes window, late at night, like he used to when they were kids and hed sneak out so they could run into the woods together.

he asks hajime to come with him. just the two of them, like they promised.

and hajime… says no.

he cant. he cant leave, not now. not when hes built something around himself. he has a girlfriend, a support system, his parents are barely in his life and as soon as he doesnt live with them they basically wont be. hes already preparing for university, locally. he cant just throw all of that out the window.

he tells fuyuhiko that he doesnt have to go. fuyuhiko knows better. wiping away tears and ignoring how it feels like his heart rips in two, he leaves, gets on the first train out of town, and doesnt look back.

hes gone for more than six years.

in that time, hajime goes to university, gets a degree. he and chiaki go steady, they both start hormones, they get good jobs that keep their heads above water. his parents arent in his life anymore. the kuzuryus move out of town, and he and natsumi share awkward goodbyes. she knows, deep down, that the only thing that could have made fuyuhiko stay was hajime, and since that didnt work… nothing could. peko stays, having grown up in her own time, and she and hajime bond over this quiet feeling of emptiness.

hes not sure exactly what it is. he misses fuyuhiko, of course, every day. misses him like a sickness that lingers in his lungs for weeks. but theres a piece of him that doesnt quite fit right, and it takes a long time for him to figure out how its connected.

and then, one day, out of nowhere, fuyuhiko reappears.

theyre in their mid 20s at this point. hes grown, though not much taller. he has scars, shorter hair, tattoos. hes cagey about where hes been, what hes been up to, who hes been with. he mentions traveling, and he mentions hospital visits. at some point, hajime stops asking, because some part of him doesnt want to know. the rest of him is just happy fuyuhiko is here again.

he asks how long fuyuhiko will be in town. the man shrugs, says ‘depends.’ hajime asks if he has a place to stay yet. he says no, he was probably just gonna book a hotel room.

he and chiaki have a pretty comfortable pullout couch, hajime says. if that would be okay for fuyuhikos back.

a bit hesitantly, fuyuhiko agrees.

for a week or two, things are… good. amazing, even. having fuyuhiko back in his life is like a puzzle piece clicking into place, like hajimes found something he didnt even realize he was missing. at first, theyre just catching up, getting lunch, roaming old haunts. catching up on lost time. but then they stop being away from each other at all. its like theyre joined at the hip, unable to be out of each others presence for more than a few minutes, and chiaki starts to notice. of course she does, she and hajime are engaged. she knows him better than he does, sometimes. and she and fuyuhiko were friends too, of a sort. though he wouldnt have let himself admit that.

she sees how he looks at her fiance. she understands, too, that hajime looks back just the same.

and then one night, shes out of the house. out with friends, staying at work late, out of town for the evening, it doesnt matter. its just the two men at their apartment, and hajime breaks out the sake. they drink, even though fuyuhiko generally cant stand the stuff, and they talk about the past.

it gets… personal. strained. they talk about things they probably shouldnt. they get heated, and upset, and they argue, and they say things they dont mean. fuyuhiko admits to being involved with unsavory business on the outside, that yeah, he fell in with the yakuza, and hes kind of on the lam right now if hes honest. hajime says if hed just stayed they could have been fine. he wouldnt be scarred and constantly looking over his shoulder. he would have been okay.

fuyuhiko says he couldnt have bared to be here any longer. that this town was smothering him, was smothering them, and he thought hajime understood that. says that he probably wouldnt still be alive if hed stayed.

in the middle of the fight, he kisses hajime. its something thats lived in his heart for so long, something hes never let himself admit or even indulge in, that even with the distance between them, even with all that time away, he cares so much for hajime. too much. so much so that it makes him reckless and impulsive and a danger to himself. hes not sure if its to prove a point or shut hajime up or stop the argument or just because hes an idiot, and he immediately regrets it, except… hajime kisses him back.

and then he kisses fuyuhiko again.

it doesnt last long. theyre both far too drunk on too empty stomachs, they both feel sick, from nausea and from the sinking realization of what theyre doing. what this means. its late, and theyre exhausted and wrung out, and they both go to sleep, apart. hajime in he and chiakis bed. fuyuhiko on the couch.

early in the morning, when chiaki returns home, that couch is empty. fuyuhikos things are gone. there isnt even a note.

and nearly ten years go by before they meet again.

hajime and chiaki get married. they settle down. they get an actual house, shockingly enough, and they end up adopting a kid. they start to get the surgeries they want and need, they change jobs, they branch out. they have support networks, and more experience just living, and maybe chiaki realizes first, maybe she realized a long time ago, maybe she knows that her husband loves her dearly but understands that there is a piece of him irrevocably tied to someone who isnt there. she knows. she gets it.

she doesnt force it. doesnt bring it up. leaves it to the man she loves to discover on his own, and he’ll confide in her if he needs to.

and then, in their mid 30s, on one nice afternoon, hajime and chiaki take their daughter to the zoo in the city. its warm and sunny, the place is full but not too crowded, and their daughter is around six or seven. shes tugging her dad around by the hand, unbelievably excited, and hajime is indulgent and laughing as chiaki trails after them.

they approach the part of the exhibit where the cranes are, tall and majestic and white, with their curved necks and sharp beaks. hajimes daughter runs to the edge of the balcony, jumping up and peering over it, and he calls after her to slow down, that hes only so fast. she looks back, but something catches her eye.

the man standing beside her, a couple feet away, has his sleeves rolled up.

“daddy!” she calls, as hajime approaches. “why does have pictures on his arms?”

hajime looks, down, at the colors that swirl across the mans skin. up across scars and the loose white dress shirt he wears. the fairly nice camera held in hands with long, lithe fingers that are far too familiar.

hes almost afraid to look up too far. his chest aches.

he does anyway, and meets a single golden eye, soft pink lips parted in surprise, as he and fuyuhiko are face to face again.

they dont have long to take in whats happening. six year olds are curious and far more observant than their given credit for, and hajimes daughter scoots closer, asking about the ink in fuyuhikos arms. what that is, what the pictures are. it distracts him, from staring into hajimes eyes, and after a brief moment of hesitation, he leans down and starts to explain tattoos, that his were very traditionally done, that he usually hides them but it was just so nice today.

he glances back up into hajimes eyes. says he doesnt really care what people think right now.

chiaki, a ways behind them, finally approaches, and greets fuyuhiko warmly. explains to their daughter that hes an old friend, that they havent seen him in a long time, and that her dad and he have a lot to catch up on. picking up the little girl, briefly squeezing her husbands shoulder and giving fuyuhiko a warm, steady look, she walks away, and the two men are left alone.

for a while, neither of them know what to say. finally, fuyuhiko asks about the kid, if shes, yknow, theirs or not. no, hajime laughs, they adopted. but he adores her, takes her to school, runs around with her outside, plays video games with her. theyre just in the city for a day trip, today, and have plans to go out to eat before heading back home.

its silent again, for a while. he asks how long fuyuhiko will be in the area. quietly, achingly. how much longer until i lose you again.

but fuyuhiko laughs a little, fiddles with his camera. hes actually in the city for school, weirdly enough. hes a lot older than most of his peers in his classes, but hes back to get a degree, maybe get a real job. hes done with all the shit from before, cut ties with the yakuza. its the first time he openly admits what hes been doing for the past eighteen years, and hajimes heart aches. that he wasnt able to help, wasnt able to pull fuyuhiko out of that.

they look at each other, and realize they dont know the person standing next to them. not anymore.

but somehow… that doesnt really matter. maybe the new person standing in their place is worth knowing too.

as they talk, hajime texts chiaki. when he gets a response, he invites fuyuhiko to come with them to dinner that night, for old times’ sake. he agrees, and actually joins the three of them wandering around the zoo for the rest of the afternoon too.

they take the train together, eat dinner. fuyuhiko is incredibly sweet with their daughter, falls in love with her instantly. shes bright and curious and talkative and constantly moving, and she points out that hes shorter than even her mommy and he cant even find it in himself to get mad.

at the end of the night, they have to go home. hajime, chiaki, and their daughter back to town, fuyuhiko back to his apartment. they say their goodbyes, and hajime lingers, unable to keep himself from hugging fuyuhiko for far longer than he should, far longer than what would be considered normal. cant stop himself from reaching up and brushing his fingers against fuyuhikos cheek below his fake eye.

he asks if fuyuhiko has a cell number thats available. fuyuhiko smiles and pulls out his phone.

they stay in contact over the next few weeks. their both busy with work and fuyuhiko with school, and they steer clear of talking about anything too hard, but they text almost daily. its not that hajime is neglecting his family either, hes just… there was always some space, a hole in his life that never felt right. and now theres something there, and it doesnt quite fit properly yet, but hes willing to just be happy its there at all.

fuyuhiko mentions reconnecting with peko, reconnecting with his sister. going to classes, exploring the city. he sends dumb selfies of him and his new puppy, and hajime sends pictures back of his daughter covered in paint from when they were painting the bathroom.

a few weeks in, chiaki asks if fuyuhiko should come over for dinner some time, maybe even to stay the night on their couch. like old times. hajime is reluctant, at first, memories of the last time that happened cropping up. but theyre older now, and fuyuhiko has responsibilities and ties, and he cant run anymore. neither can hajime. so he asks, and fuyuhiko says yes, and they plan for it to be a night where none of them have responsibilities in the morning so they can stay up after the kid’s gone to bed.

they do. dinner is wonderful, of course, and they watch a movie afterward to put their daughter to sleep, and once shes been moved to the bedroom, they break out the sake. fuyuhiko refrains, and hajime and chiaki dont drink much, just enough to loosen their tongues. the three of them talk, about the past, about when they were kids, about their families. about chiaki and hajimes transitions, about how they stayed together despite everything, though there were momentary break ups. fuyuhiko talks about his own journeys, about being caught in a spiral with the mob, about debts and violence and breaking out of it. he talks about how deeply in the closet he was for such a long time, how much it was tearing him apart. he talks about his parents, and his sister, how glad he is that she broke free from them after so long. he talks about boyfriends and one night stands and drunken mistakes.

chiaki tries to say something. tries to get them to talk properly. but hajime shuts it down, still unwilling to go too far.

when they turn in for the night, fuyuhiko on the couch, the two of them talk in bed before sleep. chiaki finally verbally says what shes been thinking for so long, that she thinks hajime loves fuyuhiko, has for a long time, maybe since they were kids. that she thinks he should give it a chance. theyre already two trans people, theyre already all queer, whats one more social transgression?

hajime is quiet. its something hes known, he thinks, for a while. just hasnt wanted to admit it. hasnt wanted to ruin what he has, what hes so meticulously built. hes just grateful fuyuhiko is here again, that hes alive and in hajimes life again for the first time in years. he doesnt want to, cant lose that. not again.

so he keeps it locked down. he says he cant, and he doesnt want to talk about it. chiaki, sadly, turns over, and flicks off the light.

in the morning, hajime gets up and finds the couch empty. for a moment, he panics, before realizing there are sounds coming from the kitchen, and when he enters, he finds fuyuhiko making breakfast. hes not doing a great job. hes not really much of a cook. but he wanted to pay them back for how kind and open theyve been, how accepting theyve been of him being back in their lives. he wants to show how grateful he is.

hajime just laughs, and says if he wants to do that, he can show it by letting hajime help so that breakfast doesnt burn. fuyuhiko cant really argue with that. they move around each other like its second nature, like theyve done it forever. like this is how its supposed to be.

when chiaki appears in the doorway, they dont see her at first. but she watches, and she smiles, and when they do notice her arrival, she slots into the dance easily. like there was always going to be space for her.

their daughter is sad that uncle hiko has to go home, but he promises he’ll be back. maybe he’ll even bring a present for her next time he comes over for dinner. that gets her excited. he looks up at hajime and winks, says maybe he’ll bring a present for him and chiaki too. it makes hajimes face feel warm, and he shoves the sappy thoughts away before they can get too strong.

for a while, they live in this limbo. fuyuhiko comes over for dinner, spends time with their daughter, watches movies and plays board games and rants about school with them. he and hajime text constantly when hes not around. his absence leeches into everything, now, far more openly than before, and even for chiaki. she finds herself missing him when she and her daughter watch a movie the girl loves for the millionth time, because the last time they watched it he was here. theres a cold spot on the couch where fuyuhiko should be sitting.

one day, hajime runs into peko, very suddenly. its been a long time since theyve seen each other, with her having her own life, and him being busy with work. they were never that close when they were young anyway. but he asks her to get coffee, spontaneously, and to his surprise she agrees. they talk, skirting around the elephant in the room for a while, but eventually it becomes impossible not to talk about fuyuhiko. peko is happy to hear hes been coming over so much, mentions that she and him have remained in contact as well, though not the extent hes maintained contact with the nanamis. they mostly talk about school, if shes honest.

she admits, quietly, that she used to love him. that part of her probably always will. but shes happy with her girlfriend, and glad that she has him as a friend at the very least. and she thinks hes happier with hajime anyway.

hajime stammers that theyre not, like, together, hes not with fuyuhiko, not like, well, like that. peko just tilts her head and gives him a knowing look, takes a sip of her coffee. says something about chiaki being reasonable, about how it hardly matters. says that the people who really matter wont care.

it lingers in hajimes head for a long time. eventually, he cant stand it, and he sits down with chiaki to have a long talk about this, about how he loves her so much and he doesnt want to leave her, that he cant, but that at the same time, he does love fuyuhiko. he can admit that, finally. he wants to be able to hold fuyuhiko, to kiss him, to be close with him and feel that warmth between them. and all chiaki does is smile, agree that he deserves that, that she wants fuyuhiko in their lives too. that he doesnt have to leave her to be with fuyuhiko. that she wants this for both of them.

hajime plans meticulously. something nice, maybe even fancy, but not too over the top. fuyuhiko likes subtlety, likes class. doesnt like too much attention on something like this. they decide to wait until their daughters class trip, so she’ll be out of the house for a few days, chiaki with her as a chaperone. itll just be the two men.

fuyuhiko is surprised by the invitation, but he doesnt say no. hes nervous, obviously. he doesnt know what hajime does, is scared if taking things too far. hes loved hajime for years, has known for years, and he doesnt want to fuck this up like he did when they were in their 20s. when he was far more hurt and far more scared and far more reckless. hes come to terms with the fact that hes never gonna have more, that he missed out, didnt manage to get the guy, and is happy enough to just have hajime in his life like he does.

they go out to dinner, just the two of them. hajime mentions at least twice that chiaki helped him plan this whole thing, trying to get across her approval. hes not sure it works, and fuyuhiko seems generally bewildered by the heavier atmosphere, confused by hajimes insistence on paying, and how hajime asks him to get in the car but wont tell him where theyre going.

their daughters class trip is for a festival, to see the bigger celebrations in the city. but there are still smaller ones here, in their hometown, and when hajime parks the car on a hill and gets out, and fuyuhiko looks down on the lights of the festival and the garlands and moving rivers of people down below, hes not confused anymore.

okay, maybe thats a lie. he is still confused. but he knows sort of why theyre here.

they sit and watch the lights, watch the sun go down and the stars twinkle into existence. they talk, mostly about nothing, about life, about school and work. they eat karinto, because hajime knows its fuyuhikos favorite, and they make jokes at each others expense and laugh and get close. and then theres a lull in the conversation.

hajime quietly asks if he can try something. asks fuyuhiko not to freak out when he does. as confused and scared as that makes him, fuyuhiko agrees.

and hajime kisses him.

theyre not drunk this time. they dont have that excuse. fuyuhiko is frozen, unsure how to respond, if he should, if hes allowed. when his voice comes back, he croaks something about chiaki. hajime reminds him that she helped plan this whole thing. “even this?” “…well, maybe not down to the exact details. but kissing you was the end goal, so… yeah. even this.”

fuyuhiko cant barely believe whats happening, can barely breathe. hajime murmurs something about needing him, about the hole in his life that had been there so long it had turned to normalcy. how fuyuhikos return had upended that normalcy, had made that hole in his chest ache like crazy because finally something was here that could fill it. how hed denied himself even the ability to consider it because he was afraid of taking that leap.

he says how funny it is, that after all this time, theyre both still running away.

fuyuhiko sets his jaw, cups hajimes face in his hands, and kisses him back.

they stay for a while, on that hill, with the distant sounds of the festival and their sweets forgotten between them. trading kisses and soft touches, hardly any words. its hard not to just get lost in it, this feeling of completion, of two pieces that never quite fit right finally finding the angle that makes them match. hajime insists that chiaki supports this, that when she comes home fuyuhiko can ask her. that she’ll be thrilled. that their daughter will be confused, sure, but ultimately fine. she’ll come to understand as she gets older. it’ll be hard, and weird, and they wont always get to be open about it.

but he doesnt care. he just wants to lie here, pressing his lips to fuyuhikos, and running his hands over the mans skin like its all hes ever wanted in his life.

eventually, they have to leave. its chilly, and theyre both tired and full of both food and warmth. on the drive back, hajimes hand lingers on fuyuhikos thigh, warm and heavy. at some point, fuyuhiko takes it in his own, brings it to his lips and kisses the knuckles. he flushes when he does, and all hajime does is smile and stroke his cheek.

chiaki is, as we already know, supportive. she insists that she knows hajime loves them both, that shes confident in their relationship, and that she cares about fuyuhiko too. they tell their daughter that if she sees daddy kissing uncle hiko, its perfectly okay, and mommy knows and is happy for them. she gets it, eventually. kids are smart, and a lot more accepting of things that people give them credit for.

fuyuhiko still stays in school, aiming for his degree. he still has his apartment in the city. but he comes over as often as he can, for family nights, for dates with hajime, for late nights with the married couple talking about adult things. for babysitting their daughter. uncle hiko becomes one of her favorite people, because hes just a little bit too indulgent, and will let her get away with stuff her parents never would. neither of them mind too much. they love watching him interact with their daughter, love that hes in her life. that hes in their lives.

thats all they can ask for.

[komorisansgarden]

i watched nimona for the first time the other day, and ive decided that yes, i will talk about it because how could I not.

i would touch on the art or the general plot, but honestly i need to talk about nimona herself first because wow did her character really resonate with me.

As someone who is queer, gnc and neurodivergent, i felt so represented by her and the way she’s treated. its no secret that there is a lot of queerphobia & ableism in the world, and theres an obvious parallel between how she’s treated and how real queer/nd people are treated irl, but i think theres so much more too.

I loved how Nimona just existed. She wasn’t afraid to run around outside and be a person. She walked through the streets, she interacted with people, she did people things. All of that made it so much more heartbreaking when you see the difference between how she’s treated before & after people find out she’s different. I felt that so much. Because I’ve been there. There have been times where I’ve had multiple, full, amicable conversations with people, and the second it comes up that I’m queer, they’ve become withdrawn. I’ve had a girl tell me “I’m just going to pretend I didn’t hear that” when I offhandedly mentioned I’m not straight. And it hurts so badly to see that shift in people around you when they find out you aren’t like them.

On top of that, I connected so deeply with the emotional turmoil she faces. Near the end, when she’s about to turn into the ‘shadow monster’ (not sure what else to call it), we can hear overlapping voices of people calling her a monster, or saying she’s unwanted. And a lot of it is Ballister, obviously, because of how close they’ve gotten, and he was the most recent rejection she’s faced. But something that I realized while watching is that (correct me if im wrong) I’m fairly certain most of what we hear coming from ‘him’ isnt actually things he’s said. As someone who’s had their fair share of mental breakdowns, it was so interesting to not only see a visual representation of what it feels like (the visuals were so stunning and hit really close to home), but also (possibly) a peak into what happens inside your head as well. There are lots of things that people have said floating around her mind, but also there are things that people haven’t- things that her mind has simply made up in a moment of complete chaos and turmoil.

Then, when she turns into the ‘beast’, we don’t really see much of her actively attacking. She’s mostly just walking forward towards the Gloreth statue- to the giant reminder of the person she loved most, who then hurt her most. We see her in an almost unresponsive state, only really reacting when she’s been hurt. And then she gets to the statue, and decides to give into the thing people want from her. I probably would have cried when we hear her thinking back to her comment of sometimes wanting to give into it, if it werent for the fact i was watching with my brothers. And speaking of that quote, I also felt that super deeply- not only the actual message, but the fact that it’s clear its not something she actively wants. It’s something that rings in her mind during really harsh moments, a silent urge to simply give in, and its scary. Its terrifying. And now, while shes in a nearly catatonic state, shes going to go through with it.

Im not sure how to wrap this up, because its currently midnight and this is basically my brain running through all the ways that i felt Nimona’s character in my soul, but,,, i suppose the take-away is that the movie is great and it did a great job at resonating with me in regards to mental illness and living in a world where people hate even the idea of your existence.