#theres so much i Want to do. and then i dont do it? when theres literally nothing stopping me??? i just sleep and eat (not enough rlly)

[mina-org]

part one - part two - part three - part four - part five you're reading part six!!

Seriously? Fuck this shit

You can’t move the frown, it’s stuck to you. What were you supposed to do? you had refused to go out with sabre because you didn’t have any money and now no electricity, your phones dead, you can’t even text him:(

Soon enough the clock strikes 12, a knock echoes through your apartment.

sabre is here and he’s gonna think you’re an idiot!

This is a great start, perfect.

Before you can unlock the door he’s letting himself in, “love you gotta keep the spare in a better place, ya lucky it’s just me.” Soon enough his shoulders are brushing past yours, heading to the kitchen.

“I picked up some food for us lovie, didn’t want ya cooking for me ‘nd hosting,” everything he does is so natural, it’s like he’s been here before and he’s not said anything about the electric situation, maybe because it’s daylight so he’s not noticed? Maybe it’s because the windows let enough light in? But you haven’t messaged him, he’s probably thinking you’re rude and now you’re being completely silent.

"im really sorry for not texting or anything, my electric isnt on and my phone is dead." you blurt out fast, your chest tightens a little, scared of his judgement, first you cant pay for coffee and now you asked him to come over and it looks like you didn't pay your electric:(

"its alright lovie, just gotta light some candles, it'll add to the mood 'nd add to the mood." he coaxes a nod out of you and you're meet with a smile. "good, now lovie I got a portable charger in the car, can get it for ya? dont want you ignoring me too much alright? and you dish out the food for us, yeah?"

"yes please, that'll be great." you soon return his smile, looking up at him! its perfect, he loves a damsel, especially one in distress(ignoring the fact he and his bros are the reason for it but thats none of your business)

Kyle searches through his car and puts his phone on mute, and changes Simon's name on his phone, doesnt want you to see Johnny simon, and price on his phone and put one and one together. the thought of johnny's tech fumble still gives him a giggle. that man hides his intelligence so, so well.

soon enough hes back upstairs, placing the charging brick on a side table before wrapping his arms around you, bringing into his chest and snapping a picture, "it'll be good for a scrapbook love, 'nd I wanna show off my pretty girl to my friends." he informs you and usually you'd protest but sabre was a breathe of fresh air, he was everything you wanted in simon and you didnt have to beg for it.

soon enough tea light candles are scattered across the table, charting out the new constellations that'll shine over you sabre, no, no, no.

You're getting ahead of yourself, you've known sabre for like 30 minutes? can't plan your wedding right now, when he goes home though? free range!!!

"so um, I thought we could like do a little painting dating, I grabbed a couple of canvases and stuff."

"great! I see this stuff all over 'nd I never 'ad anyone to do it with." sabre responds eagerly, he settles into his seat

"what are ya gonna paint?"

"not sure yet" you stare at the colours and suddenly you've never seen anything before.

"have ya seen the hand one? like we both have a colour and than I press my hand on the canvas 'nd than you do it over mine" he suggests.

do you just wanna compare hand size? you tilt your head to the side.

"yeah, but this way ill have a painting for when ya busy, unless youre willing to give me a hand, love?" he nods, admitting it with a laugh, you notices theres a hint of embarrassment, "'m a clingy bugger love, hope that's alright."

you nod at his words, "me too" you say simply and sabre starts picking out colours.

"you wanna be purple love, 'nd I can be green?" you nod and sabre is soon tugging up his sleeve and passing over his hand for you to paint.

you hold his hand so gently, he can't remember the last time he was held so delicately. the mix of the sensation of bristles and cold paint sends a shiver down his spine but you hold him steady and the scent he had smelt on simon and lingered in his flat it's suddenly flooded him, moorish caramel and rich vanilla, he wants to take a bite out of you.

his hand is soon covered in the pistachio green paint and moving to press down on the canvas.

now its your turn, but sabre is already tugging your sleeve up and a gently but firm hand brushes a layer of lavender over your own hand, you and sabre chat about everything and anything, his thumb gently rubs up and down.

soon enough the painting is done and sabre's got his phone out and taking pictures of you and the creation, saying he'll post it. little do you know he's sending it to simon who's spiralling because what the fuck? you always sent those sappy videos to him and now youre doing them, with Kyle:( not him. sickening. blood rises and he wants to grab Kyle out of your flat and take back his place.

sharing has never been Simons strong point.

taglist: @skeletonsucker @supernova2205 @wh0re4-alexademi @grr457 @gh0st-spid3r @sweetlittleblackrose @aceywaycy @mooievis @theadultoedge @cheese-pull @imtherain@h0e-02 @misscaller06 @lucilleifer @cherryflavoredguts @junitries @aneternallyexhaustedpigeon @drewsphswife @just-lilita @bvrnxy @crempuffie @erintaro @skyfire93 @my-little-evil-blog @alexalix-z@littlemiss-it-girl

[k-aemi]

haii, i would like to request stepcest with rin itoshi. like he caught her dry humping his pillow when he got home. and he's gonna punish her for that, thank you so much!

itoshi rin ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ told you to wait for me.

smut, stepcest, use of toys

it wasnt like you planned this or even meant for this happen. it just sort of did. knowing rin, he did have a rough time making connections with others with his cold demeanor after the encounter with sae that one night. after that, hes just as determined as ever, hoping to excel over sae.

he has his frustrations. kicking the ball wouldnt help because itd get too flat by the time, and he couldnt just punch a random hole in the wall, destroying his fathers house. the only one that would keep up with him and not break is you. he can use you again and again.

he knows its wrong but fuck he cant enough of that face of yours. though hes focused on his career, he has his urges too y'know? after all, hes just a guy.

plus its not like you mind, he thinks. ever since hes touched you, all you ever did was comply and let him do as he pleased. yeah hes your step brother, but who can resist such an handsome guy? and one with long bottom lashes too at that.

his touch is too addictive. those godly thick thighs, his slender fingers, and those siren eyes of his has you in a trance. its like a one in a billion chance and yet hes your step brother which you find annoying.

hes always away for long period of time due to football, it has you longing for his touch. you shouldnt be treating this like it’s a regular thing(which is not). but hes like a drug. not like youve taken any but if you had to give an example it would be rin.

you just cant help when he texts you to just wait for him, itd be about twenty minutes before his practice ends, but its twenty minutes too long! youre in his bed, inhaling his scent around the room as you wear his hoodie thats of course way too oversized for you, but you loved feeling small around him. it gave you an excitement to just wanna be so obedient to rin.

its been far too long, theres no way you can wait for another half an hour…its fine right? a little fun time with yourself wouldnt hurt. and it definitely wouldnt hurt having your pussy juices all up on his pillow.

just some slight friction should get you off. his scent is enough to keep you going. slowly propping yourself on his pillow, grinding against it. little groans elicit from your mouth continuing your movements.

“r-rin…” you whimper out, imagining it was your older brother beneath you instead of this dumb pillow. you miss his voice, his touch, his beautiful face. you just wanted him home right now. you sped up your movements while your forehead rests on the pillow, hands clenching on the fluff.

the way the pillow rubs against your clit so slightly just wasnt enough…you wanted his long fingers to circle your bud, until youre crying and begging for him to stop. you wan’ his cock in your mouth, face fucking you till youre gagging. wan’ his long cock to fuck that sweet pussy of yours.

its wrong. its wrong to yearn for his touch. you know its fucked up, but you cant stop yourself once youve gotten a taste of him.

“mmh—please r-rin needa come so bad..” you breathed out as your rubbing becomes sloppy but faster.

“do you now.” your eyes widened at the sudden stern voice from afar. you halt before look behind you, only to see him leaning against the door frame.

“rin! wha—i thought you didnt leave until—“ “canceled early due to rain.” he didnt say anything further except walked to the bed. you can feel the dip and you cover yourself in his blanket.

“dont act like ive never seen this sweet pussy before.” closing in on you, he removes the covers before harshly rubbing circles on your sensitive bud, pressing onto it.

“r-rin—! oh god…please..” your hips moved in a circular motion , staring down at his ministrations on you.

yes, you waited for this! for his touch…god he makes you feel incredible no matter the day, mood, or situation. his touch was magical. like a cure to any illness.

that feeling of joy soon fades as he retreats his hand. “h-huh…? rin? whyd you stop! need to come…” you whined and he can only keep that stoic face of his. he caresses your cheek softly as he sighs.

“told you to wait, cant even follow simple directions silly ‘mouto?” that was…true. but if you had known he would come home so early you wouldnt have done it! you swear!

“thought youd take to long thats why…’m sorry wont do it again…” you take hold of his wrist placing it onto your clit to rub, feeling that sensation again..only to retract his hand and grab hold of your jaw, squishing your cheeks tightly.

“who said you can just do that huh? had a fuckin’ bad today, and you just g’na make it even worse for me.” he growled, the pain in your jaw starting to leave you sore. youre squirming under his touch. “s-sorry rin didnt know…” he clicks his tongue before opening the drawer of the night stand next to his bed, revealing a little toy vibrator.

“you do this and ill stuff you with my cock yeah?” he licks a stripe up your cheek and you nod eagerly. you loved his cock, his cum tastes a bit sour but the aftertaste always makes you desiring more<3

rin attaches the vibrator to your bud and you huffed from the contact, the cold air hitting your bare pussy. rin turns it on to the lowest setting and you let out a ragged breath. its not too intense but felt good. but not good enough…you wanted to increase the power just a bit.

but of course rin isnt gonna give you what you want. what he wants. he raises it to the maximum and you squeal. your back arched as you try to reach out to rin to grab hold of. “r-rin! too much!” your thighs tensed.

“yeah, that’s the good stuff.” he would occasionally lower, then higher the intensity of the vibration and it had you going nuts. you just wanted to come, but rin isnt giving you that!

“this what you get and ill make sure you dont forget what happens when you dont listen to your nii chan.” rin is so mean…but he’s actually super nice. hes just frustrated right now and wants to relieve some of that stress on to you which you dont mind. even if he continues to deny your orgasm.

you dont even know how many times youve came so close to cum…but rin knows you too well when youre bout to. he always times it just right so that youd lose that excitement in your pussy. your eyes are teary and you cant even control your breathing from the intensity.

you wanna just touch yourself and finish the job but you know hell even deny you for more hours! so you better behave…even if youre crying for him to just let you cum.

rin coos you, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear before kissing your forehead. “think you learn your lesson yeah?” you nod eagerly. you wanted to come so bad, wanted his seed inside of you.

he chuckled. he knows you want to have that sweet released. but he loves seeing you so vulnerable beneath him. you can take a little more can you? of course you can, you want the best for your nii chan right?

“know you can handle it a bit longer ‘mouto. then ill give you my cock okay?.”

late post again was lazyy (⇀‸↼‶)

divider: magicalboything

[sleepwalk-station]

and ill cherish you until the day i die

(more stuff below cut)

hi this is a very personal headcanon of mine, so theres a few details that will be very close to me, and a bit sensitive to others. but my deimos has a chronic illness. and him being a clone, he doesnt live very long. i hc that clones only live 50 years maximum... maybe even less because they arent really expected to survive. so to deimos, theres that sense of impending doom whenever a day passes. one day, maybe he wont wake up at all.

deimos fears that he's going to be the first one to die out of all of them. normally, hes cocky about his own mortality, but dying in a slow, silent or sudden death with no one around him is devastating. hank and sanf doesnt know, and 2b is the only one whos aware. dei doesnt know if he'll be missed, or even thought of at all. and everyday, his body is progressively getting worse. he stumbles all over, 2b knows that he cant really fix him and can only watch dei crumble under his own body.

i relate to that a lot. living with such a debilitating illness (especially one related to heart disease) makes you spiral. it makes you scared. it makes you feel like you did something wrong, or you made someone mad, and being born this way was a punishment. your body is frail and weaker than an average person, and you cant do anything but suffer.

i dont know how long i will live myself. my mom fears i wont even make it to my 30s. its such a crushing pressure to just.. breathe.

dei copes a lot of that stress with cigarettes. he cant help himself. this is the only way to relief it. its the only solution he knows.

2b comforts him. i know this isnt the solution to all of your problems, but i want to be here for you. when you need me. he will remember dei, no matter what. a promise.

dei clings onto him. i know that its true. because i trust you. despite it all, you just want to live for someone you care. no matter what life throws at you. will you still try to live a fulfilling life? of course. because they care. they want to see you happy. they want you to enjoy what you have, even if its very limited. even if your life is so short and its all so scary.

2b's hands are so gentle on him. its never like this with hank or sanf. normally he would just shout orders at them and they leave. hes so. soft. with dei. it makes him feel like the most special boy in the world. in his worst moments, dei becomes so weak and fragile due to his illness that he cant move like he used to, something like this would be immediately disregarded or thrown out if he was still in the agency. and he doesnt understand why 2b doesnt mind, but he appreciates it. so much.

i must cease my yapping. this is getting embarrassing.

[walnutcookie]

would astro be considered organic after he got changed by the ichor heart thingy? or is he still technically a robot?

ok. lets see how short i can see this because unfortunately i really like thinking about the nuances about this

Although i call them animatronics, i wouldnt consider the TOS toons actually animatronics, or robots, or machines of any kind. The main reason i call them animatronics is just cause its way easier than calling them. whatever the fuck they even are. artificial beings?? but i mean beyond that there is an actual lore purpose. In the universe of TOS they are considered animatronics - arthur and delilah insist to everyone that theyre just super high-tech animatronics. Maybe they would be better described as robots, or androids, or something that functions on its own, since they would seem to have some sort of AI in them and thats usually described as a robot or android (to the public at least, its not ai but thats how it would be percieved), but "animatronic" carries a much different connotation than other words to refer to machines like this. animatronic is the combination of the words "animation" and "electronics" which already implies that theres a lot of creativity involved, but the word animatronic is mostly used to refer to the things used in art and shows n stuff (like theme parks!!!). I feel like just calling them robots takes away that aspect of them. Robot feels too harsh and cold, too lifeless. Arthur and delilah created them with vivid dreams of inspiring kids to want to learn. The entire point of the toons was to entertain, so I feel like that fits them better. sorgy this whole au is just me putting my theme park autism on display for everyone to see HA

god im so bad at staying on topic im sorry help. anyways onto the ichor part ,,, i like to describe tower of souls as a conflict between human and nature, between man and machine, between nature and machine, and then some weird fourth thing,,, ichor doesnt really have a word to describe it ! Its not human or machine, thats for sure, but its not natural by any means, either. i dont know what the hell it is or how it got there, its just some kind of Being. an alien?? maybe! a god? maybe! up to interpretation ! Really the best way to describe it is a virus. some sort of weird in-between of alive and inanimate where its definitely moving but it doesnt have a molecule of living matter in it. I have yet to elaborate on how ichor works exactly but to put it briefly, it uses inanimate things as hosts to be able to move on its own. as a fluid its powerless, and in small quantities its very limited, but in large amounts with a large enough host it can do a lot. It also shapeshifts to blend in with its host which is how it wasnt easy to tell what happened to the toons when they were getting ichor-ified :P

ichor is just meant to be confusing in general, so its hard to define what the toons are, both before and after they were purified. Some sort of paradox - are they really considered "alive" if they have no living cells? No organs. No brain, but they still have thoughts. No heart, but they still have a heartbeat. No lungs, but they can still breathe. They can still choke. They can feel pain without nerves, without a heart to ache. What really defines something as alive? they wouldnt be considered dead, since there was nothing in them to die, so what are they? Unalive???? this haunts astro and sprout especailly lolololol theyre the extistential crisis brothers. The ichor simulates human experiences and feelings for them, so although they dont actually have functioning bodies like that, the ichor gives them the illusion of feeling and experiencing these things. i dont even like to call them sentient without quotes; the definiton on google is "able to perceive or feel things" but they dont ACTUALLY perceive and feel these things... theyre just having them simulated. again its meant to be confusing on purpose lol

So to answer your question ,,, hes neither organic nor robot! he is some secret fucked up third thing. and he is haunted by this <3 thank you for the ask i love having excuses to ramble about the things in my brain heehee (also thank u if you read all that)

[sturnioz]

i think if fb chris was a real person, bun would be the type of girl that would help him be able to be in a relationship again, BUT it would never be able to be bun. from my experience with guys like fb chris, they do find someone that sticks it out with them (without necessarily trying to change them) and it does something to them that eventually makes them crave ‘love’ or emotion again.

here’s my little theory with chris because we don’t know why he is this way. i think bun is unlike a lot of the girls he’s been with before which i also think is why so many of the frat brothers are so caught up of bun being the ‘one’ for him in a way. unfortunately with them being so pushy at times, it will make chris resent someone (either frat bros or bun or himself) a lot more over time. i don’t think we seen a ton of that stuff but doesn’t mean we won’t.

which i guess could be true that bun and him could be ‘the one’ but in reality i don’t think it will be. i do think bun makes him see things in different perspectives (for example the frat wedding and him realizing she was humiliated just like he was) which will push him to not be as bad as he was before.

there’s def a lot of ways that all could go, IF and i definitely mean IF chris ever gets to a point where he does think he wants a relationship again, do we actually think bun will stick it out that long? because i don’t think so. chris needs work and i think the moment bun is actually going to be looking for something real, she will drop it with chris because she knows her current situation now. theres so many ways this could all go which is what is beautiful about a slow burn.

i think i’ve said it in a message before this situation could be a right person wrong time. which is sad but sometimes people (chris) needs to experience that to be able to get love that everyone deserves at the end of the day.

to me it’s getting a little annoying watching people complain. don’t read it then. this is a slow burn story. it would be so so so boring if they already got together. it would be disappointing to read if we were able to predict everything as it was happening.

anyways love your writing, love you, love slow burn, please don’t change the story because people are unhappy

-🐛

im sorry i dont have much to say without giving my whole au away but i just want you to know that this is such a beautiful theory. i genuinely love reading what you're thinking abt and whats going through your mind and how you process everything when it comes to this au like its so fun and interesting

[feelo-fick]

chilaios telepathy compilation. btw.

also these ones arent telepathy i just think its fun that they defend eachother + are on the same page about alchohol :

[nintendont2502]

got up to MAG 53. so many thoughts already

i love paranoid jon. love him and his stupid fucking supplementals and tapes hidden under the floorboards and the way hes so insanely suspicious of everyone that he thinks his boss is up to something when he (reasonably enough) tells him to stop following people home. incredible. no ones doing it like him. im still fully on team 'jons going to snap and try to kill someone/potentially himself' bc wow hes not doing much to convince me otherwise

MICHAEL !! MICHAEL APPEARANCE!! MICHAEL VOICE REVEAL!! MICHAEL BEING A THREATENING FUCKASS. MICHAEL STABBING PEOPLE

love that guy. what is its fucking DEAL

"i am not a who, archivist. I am a what." incredible

^ ALSO. calling jon "Archivist". i was so fucking right when i said its a far more important title than just a regular job. thats your identity now jonny boy have fun with that

also also. "the loss of this place wouldve unbalanced the struggle too early" cool! great! what the fuck does that mean!!

basira is great. tim thinking her and jon are together has peak me and my also closeted gay friends in highschool energy

jon admitting out loud that he believes a statement is true. ough

why are there so many michaels. michael spiral yaoi hands my beloved. mike crew lookin for leitners. michael salesa who i am endlessly fascinated by. the fuck is he up to

i still dont know how to feel about the institute. i still dont trust it.

cant help but draw connections between leitner's books and the archive's statements,,, someone mentioning that ever since leitners books have been released to the market, rare book dealers keep disappearing or dying (presumably because they own them). a statement giver owning one briefly and clearly being mentally affected (constant vertigo. an almost manic impulse to chase down someone who stole "his" book to get it back). i cant tell if they contain knowledge that outside forces dont want people to know about or if the books themselves dont want people to know whats inside but either way theres clearly something malevolent and harmful going on there.... so how the FUCK can gerard keay and mike crew and jurgen fucking leitner own so many of them and be. alive (because theres no way these freaks are mentally fine). how can LEITNER own that many for YEARS. what th efuck

anyway. the leitner -> tape connection. Archivists are clearly in danger by just reading/recording statements. jon mentions feeling like hes being watched when he just *reads* them. prentiss directly targeted him and the statements in her attack. something out there clearly doesnt want this shit archived and that fascinates me

and. the main thing. the thing i cant stop thinking about

theres,,, categories. very clear very distinct categories that all the statements seem to fall under - and a hell of a lot of those categories seem to have an associated paranormal/otherwordly figure to go along with them? (obviously not all of them so far but im fully expecting more to show up as this progresses) i cant fully figure out what the relationship between the two is (do the figures manifest their respective categories? are the figures created *from* the manifestations of their categories? do they get power from them or do they fuel them? augh). the concrete ones ive managed to figure out so far (with a huge asterisk because im very much aware that theres still 150 episodes left to prove me wrong and i have an insanely limited sample size atm) are:

worms. bugs. potentially rot/decay/meat(??? huge asterisk on this one). obviously prentiss aligned but,,, idk. im honestly leaning more towards the *worms* being the figurehead for this one bc like. jane was a real human person yk. before she got wormed she just... existed normally. in my mind its less jane prentiss as the manifestation of the rot/decay category/fear/whatever and more her just being... a vessel for it, i guess

spirals, hallways, rooms that shouldnt exist. michael yaoi hands

uncanny valley/fake people/people acting unnaturally/wrong. no figurehead so far, but definitely has something to do with circus of the other/whatever the fuck not!sasha is. im not sure whether to categorise statements like the boatswains call (where its real normal people who are just,,, compelled by some outside force to act unnaturally) under this category, but its all i got so far so. shrugs

webs/maybe spiders. feels very archive aligned so far - webs in the tunnels. webs on the tape recorder. webs around gertrudes body. someone describing the archive itself as a web thats captured all of them in MAG 39. feels very much like. the unknown. mysteries. something greater than you that youre trapped within. table that makes you dissociate has a web design. the lighter jon was given from that one statement is described as having a web design. i dont know what to make of that. no figurehead so far

"the vast"? sky too big. sea too big. potentially buildings/rooms too big. insanely linked to ex altoria (or however you spell it. fuck ass leitner book) - the description of the huge creature coming to destroy something that just keeps getting closer and closer and becoming larger and larger until its incomprehensibly huge and *still growing*. that literally manifesting in that one diver statement where she sees the unknowably huge thing (within a section of ocean thats impossibly large and deep when it physically shouldnt be). the sky eating people. anything thats bigger than it should be, almost impossibly so. the lightning figure in MAG 46 (and by extension mike crew) feels incredibly connected to this one (the figure being driven away (??) by ex altoria which is clearly a manifestation/documentation/??? of this particular category) but i cant tell if thats because its the figurehead for it or if its related to something else that hates the vast (like. pokemon type matchup style yk /hj)

darkness. manifests as rooms too dark for any light to get into, lights going out, potentially eyes being clawed out/missing/generally being blind. figurehead feels like it could be that shadow demon thing that robert montauk was killing people to defeat (? somehow) and was later killed by. associations with that cult from the same episode that has the closed eye symbol + the cult that someones girlfriends roommate joined

fire. a lot of fire. a lot of things heating up unnaturally and without any specific cause, a lot of mysterious rituals with scorch marks and burnt animals, that fucking lighter. also a lot of fire destroying other manifestations of other categories/fears which is interesting. im not sure what to make of this one yet. i feel like theres a leitner involved somehow but i cant remember so take that one with a grain of salt

i dont know if this is along the same lines as the rest of these, but. theres something with archives. something watching them. MAG 53 all but confirmed that for me - the alexandria archive having that same feeling of being watched that jon feels (and gertrude, from what i could tell by her reaction). fuck, the soldier outright saying that the feeling in the magnus archives is the same feeling he got in the alexandria archive. im assuming he got that feeling because he was the only living thing in the alexandria archive and tried to read something in there, making him an Archivist by proxy? only explanation i can come up with for why he feels the watching feeling and no other statement giver or institute staff does (unless they do and havent mentioned it). no associations yet (maybe that long fingered one eyed thing in the alexandria archive, but,,,, eh. idk. i get the feeling this thing wouldnt manifest physically), feels very archive specific. feels very Archivist specific. i really want someone who isnt an Archivist to try reading/recording a statement (that isnt their own) to see if they get the same feeling. the watcherr

and then a few loose ones that im not really confident defining as set categories but. theyre something:

theres a lot of tunnels. a weird amount of tunnels. a weird amount of tunnels consistently described as feeling both disturbingly natural and disturbingly manmade. id say this has something to do with robert smirke (since iirc he was definitely linked to the ones under the leitner bulding and *maybe* had something to do with the ones under the magnus institute?) or his apprentice, but - the ones in alexandria.... unless those were made by someone using the same paranormal methods he was. much to think about. if i had to align them under a preexisting category itd probably be michaels but..... idk. it doesnt really seem to fit.

theres something with meat. im tempted to just consider it an offshoot or the rot/bugs/decay/prentiss category but. hm. idk. theres been a few statements that are solely focused on meat. no rot no decay. jon even says something about "its description puts me in the mind of some more... meaty statements" which is. yeah. it implies im on the right track with considering meat as something seperate to rot and decay but. hm. idk

weird mind shit/unreality feels like something? thats definitely been a running theme (vase that gaslights you. guy with the prophetic death dreams) but also < not really much evidence for it so far. feels too vague. temporary placeholder category until i can fully narrow down what the fuck its deal is

finished season one of tma last night ! just gonna dump my thoughts here before i start season two (so i can come back and see how wrong i was lmao)

jon's va is a PHENOMENAL actor, holy shit. like dont get me wrong theyre all amazing, but oh my GOD

speaking of, while im sure the out of universe reasoning for jon putting his entire archivussy into the statements is just bc it makes them more interesting to listen to, i still personally choose to believe that the institute purely hired him for his voice acting skills

theres something.... interesting with jons role that i cant stop thinking about. jane prentiss only referring to him as "archivist". the transcripts (or at least, the ones im using) only referring to him as "archivist". his first impulse being to grab the tape recorder during jane's attack and record the entire thing. the title of archivist is kinda beginning to feel more like... a mask i guess? something that takes over and kinda overshadows your old identity. youre not jon, youre not gertrude - youre just "archivist"

(also something about martin being forced to move into the archives (almost becoming part of the archives) and sasha literally having her identity subsumed and stolen by. whatever the fuck not!sasha is. both of those occurrences only happening because they were acting on behalf of the institute. kinda noticing a trend of identities being lost or stolen or changed because of (and maybe by) the institute, but that could just be a "i connected two dots" "you didnt connect shit" moment yk)

i fully believe the role of archivist is cursed. like one hundred percent. theres something up with that shit and theres no way in hell theyre being paid enough to make up for it

tbf theres no way in hell anyone heres being paid enough to make up for the bullshit they go through. id say they should quit but,,, i dont think they can

except maybe martin. please martin. go live a normal life and write your poetry and stop needing to corkscrew worms out of yourself

"i refuse to become another goddamn mystery" :((

i dont trust the institute. at all. i think at best theyre just a shitty workplace willing to turn a blind eye to some things for the good of their research, and at worst theyre actively hiding something or lying about what they are. theres just been. so many small details that rub me the wrong way yk - the archive team not being allowed to research cases that involve the lukas family in case they pull funding, sasha mentioning research students testing artefacts, the way MAG 37/Burnt Offering starts with jason begging the institute to save his son before acknowledging that theyll never do anything (makes me wonder how many statements they read and dismiss. how many statements they never read. how many people have died because of them?) - and i mean fuck just the general regard for employee health and safety seems to be non existent. also. yk. someone in the building probably murdering gertrude. thats a big thing

worms and rot and decay in the walls and a dead body in the basement. i dont trust them at all

this is definitely just me picking up what the episode was clearly laying out but holy shit gertrudes death feels *wrong*. all this build up, all the signs pointing towards it being something supernatural (the archive being filled with veins (?) in The Dreamers, the ritual site filled with photos of her in Burnt Offering, jane directly threatening the archivist in her statement (which wouldve been gertrude at the time if im not mistaken)) and then its just?? a gun?? and no one finds her body for a year???

that being said the mental image of jane and her merry band of worms sneaking into the archive just to shoot gertrude with a Regular Ass Gun is fucking hilarious

the only episode that really got to me was A Sturdy Lock, and i think that was just bc i got unlucky enough to listen to it on the one night i was home alone. woke up at 4 am, stared at my doorknob for a few minutes and forced myself to go back to sleep

favourite statement is probably a tie between The Dreamers (i love how perfectly it captured the distorted, off, slightly... disturbing vibes i get in my dreams, and as someone who was really vivid really weird dreams - it hit close to home) and Hive (bc holy SHIT jons acting in this was insane. jesus christ. the writing was incredible too holy fuck)

favourite *episode* is Infestation, just bc im a sucker for hearing Jon out of character (for lack of a better term - its fuckin *weird* hearing him emote. i love it) and i love getting more of the other archive staff (especially martin. martin my beloved martin my light more martin forever please and thank you). also jon admitting that he does believe most of the statements and hes fucking terrified of them hits like a truck when youve been making "jon doesnt believe something - take a shot" jokes for the last 38 episodes like i was

jons such a bitch /aff i love him. pathetic wet cat of a man

i fully expect him to try and kill someone next season. potentially himself. hopefully not martin

leitner and your fuck ass books when I Fucking Get You

where is sasha. where is my girl. give her back.

mahtiin :(((

[xxplastic-cubexx]

chat if i may speak

[nordidia]

having a very rough night so raph doodles needed to be made

when in need, mash two interests together

[doobledabbadoo]

got around making some more htf ocs!! i honestly cant stop theyre too fun to make actually

[tinrange]

The Faifah storyline in particular was an extreme letdown to me because there was so much there that I felt could be said. But the show refused to address queerness in plain terms it got lost in the shuffle.

Fou4mod self sabotages and was counting on being left. But the actions he took towards Faifah were not just about him, and if there had been more breathing room in the back end I feel like the audience wouldve been able to process it for the violation of her that it was.

For background, there is a literal epidemic of boys in school taking advantage of the girls around them by running their pictures into AI websites that generate nudes and sexual pictures and videos. The advancement of AI has allowed for the exploitation of young girls to run rampant. Most young people have seen constant uncensored and oftentimes violent porn before theyve had their first sexual or even romantic encounter, its led to a generation thats simultaneously scandalized by anything mildly explicit and desensitized to sexual depictions of anything, and anyone. I think its important to mention that, the conservative backslide in society is evident but the reason many of these kids are so easily recruited through the Porn Is Bad We Hate Sex pipelines is because they feel violated by an internet thats increasingly not for them.

Just as important is gelboys commitment to making sure the audience also sees the internet as a real communicative space. It is not a place of escape or anonymity, instead it functions as a way to continuously posture and to constantly surveil the people around you. The aesthetics of gelboys are cheery, but theyre clear that theres no way to turn it Off and not respond without impacting the relationships you have with others.

With all that said. Faifah is a young trans girl, in school surrounded by all boys. Faifah being trans, and it not being discussed, is not a problem in and of itself. But Fou4mod violating Faifah in the public eye by creating an AI video of them kissing and then posting it while the show acts as if this does not highlight her vulnerability even within the LGBTQ+ community, is. Trans girls and women are routinely sexualized against their will. To have a young, queer, boy do that to his girlfriend? And then move past it, and even parallel Fou4s apology to Faifah with Chians apology to Fou4mod? Its borderline unacceptable and is probably why Fou4 feels much more inaccessible to me in the finale than he does basically any time prior.

The show tries to show that he's grown and wishes to appreciate his friends by reversing when Baabin handed him a drink and he wasnt there to take it, but it simply doesnt work when this huge breach goes unaddressed and all he has to do is sulk to make up for it.

To me, Chian pays at least some of his dues because his striving to be better is shown. You literally watch him suffer through the find out phase after having fucked around. But it's very odd that this show completely sidesteps a problem of its own creation and in doing so sidelines the feelings of another young queer person.

Similar to Baabins behavior in the last episode and his literal xenophobia to Bua as a way to protect his feelings. These characters did genuinely troubled things, and wanting to root for them afterwards is the sign of a great COA. But by those coming-of-age standards there should have been actual periods of growth thereafter wherein Fou4mod, and Baabin actually had the growth onscreen, instead of the audience filling in emotional gaps.

I dont think the show is ruined by the ending, but from what was presented in Chians arc it's rush at the end definitely affects the characters and both relationship resolutions wound up feeling quite unfinished to me, as if they had to cram all those ideas into an hour.

You mentioned you felt the ending of gelboys was a result of romance tropes, im not necessarily inclined to disagree with that despite my post, but can you expand slightly?Romance sells and television is a business, so I understand the frustration in that. Do you think anything in the story couldve been shifted to have you accept the ending for Fou4? Ive been sitting on thoughts about coming of age story conventions in relation to gelboys, do you think theyre used well?

Oh there are so many things contained within that one little comment for me, but I will try to break them down. First, some context on the broader industry, and note that this commentary applies much more broadly than just to Gelboys:

Thai BL (and romance convention) demands a happy romance ending, even when it doesn’t fit the story being told. With shows like Gelboys that don’t really follow BL structure and tropes but are still marketed as BLs, there is a tension there and a question about whether they’ll stick to their themes or fold to the romance ending.

Gelboys is marketing its actors as idols which means their careers will benefit more from a ship ending that will make fans happy and possibly allow them to promote and work in pairs. The way the Thai BL industry is structured around pairs often results in narrative interference to protect the pair even at the expense of the story.

Now, a few things more specific to Gelboys:

I think this show has been generally excellent on coming of age conventions and in representing the ways the current iteration of social media has shaped the ancient courting rituals. I do think the story was rendered a bit less impactful by placing the show in the no homophobia BL bubble (and in fact just never addressing sexuality at all).

Boss Kuno has a long pattern of telling queer stories that don’t fit the BL mold but then sticking BL romance endings on them anyway. He even did it in Paradise of Thorns, which I could barely believe given the themes and tone of that film. So this was not unexpected but still a bit of a womp womp for me.

I think the story lost Fourmod’s trajectory in the shuffle a bit in the last few episodes (basically from the Faifa arc on). It’s not that I think it’s out of character for him to end up drifting back to Chian, but we weren’t very in tune with where he was emotionally for all this back and forth and the ending with Chian was presented by the show as positive when we’ve already seen how miserable Fourmod has been every time he’s caught up in Chian’s orbit. As a result, it felt discordant to me to present him drifting back to Chian out of loneliness as a “happy” ending.

In terms of what the show could have done differently, I would have loved it if they’d left it at Fourmod walking away from Chian and allowing him to actually move on. That actually feels kinder to the character to me than him circling back to Chian. They could even have shown him meeting someone new if they wanted to reassure us he’d be fine. Alternatively, the ending we got for him, but presented as dark and depressing, also would have worked well for me (though clearly it’s not the note Boss wanted to end on).

I liked this show a lot which is why I felt a bit deflated by the ending falling short. But even with that said, I think it’s one of the best coming of age stories in BL.

[skitskatdacat63]

2009 Abu Dhabi Grand Prix - Sebastian Vettel(ft. Mark Webber & Jenson Button)

[burrythebusy]

Every single chapter is important. Every panel, all the dialogue, every page and how it transfers into the next one... I 100% believe no questions that every single decision made in hrkg is intentional. Even the tiny chapters that are like seven pages, they're important! Even if it feels like nothing happened in the chapter, something did. Something important. If it's not glaring, it may be a tiny reflection. If it's not super loud, it might just be quiet. But it's there. I promise you it's there. A lot of this comes from the fact that i am obsessed with this piece of media and I don't expect casual enjoyers to analyze every chapter, but just because you don't see it doesnt mean it's not there. The development, the meaning, the purpose, it's all there and always has been, it reveals itself bit by bit and i stand by that

[tskumoyuuma]

......has enough time passed for tumblr to become a safe enough space to say iv always shipped bakudeku

[wackywatchdotcom]

imo jax has no clue that hes miserable. like hes putting on a face for sure but i dont think he actually has the emotional awareness to know WHY hes doing that. he just wants to look cool and masculine and thats as far as he thinks on it. theres more to it but he doesnt know that. being sad isnt cool so he wouldnt even entertain the idea that hes secretly sad

[deoidesign]

ok I've been teasing about this comic a long time if you're interested you can save the page!