#therealtonystark

[genius-billionare-playboy]

Avengers Headcannons

-main 6-

no warnings

set between civil war and infinity war

Tony Stark

-his sunglasses barely protect his eyes. in fact, has trouble seeing out of the different colored sunglasses he wears, but it makes him feel cool, so he wears them. end of story.

-owns countless different suits and ties, just for all of them to look exactly the same. he's in denial about it.

-a guy who probably prefers records and CD over platforms like spotify, when he feels like listening to music.

-has (and still does) own nerdy science shirts like peter, but only wears them on his floor.

-he uses so much hair gel/hair spray to keep his hair looking neat, despite hating the feeling of it. appearance always comes first, according to him.

-has several times stolen steve's suit to "improve it," when he was actually just trying it on and posing in the mirror. (not a ship!)

-he LOVES watching gilmore girls and dance moms. its a guilty pleasure that only pepper needs to know about.

-gives people nicknames because he cannot care less about someones name, or he just really likes them. no in between.

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Steve Rogers

-has those cute fluffy socks with dogs on them, but no one ever sees them with his costume on.

-uses all of tony's hair products, (usually asks), and tries different methods to make his hair stay in place.

-during civil war, he truly knew that giving in to the government would be the best, but was afraid he would be taken control of.

-has bleached his hair many times as a teenager, and does not regret it at all.

-shops at the most random stores. this man probably has clothes gap, even though he can afford anything he wants.

-younger, he could not cook to save his life. with the help of nat, wanda and vision, he cooks femominally and is the unofficial baker in the avengers tower.

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Thor Odison

-for a while, he had no clue as to why others couldn't pick up mjolnir. he truly thought that they were worthy.

-enjoys trying new drinks (alcoholic or not) and foods whenever he can.

-has electrocuted himself several times while trying to unplug something.

-ironically, he spends the least time on his hair, and it looks the best.

-once called clint mjolnir on accident, and now does it on purpose just to annoy him.

-has horrible taste in clothes, but always pulls off a look bc well... its thor.

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Clint Barton

-has no idea what he's doing in his life anymore, but its whatever. he finds a way.

-has terrible memory. not because of age, just in general.

-even before losing his hearing fully, he always had poor hearing. at some point natasha started throwing little things like pens at him to get his attention.

-has on several occasions forgotten which arrows do what, but it usually works out in his favor.

-cherishes his bows more than himself. arrows? don't matter. he'll just go buy some more. bows, however? will throw himself to protect them without hesitating.

-uses kate's skincare thinking she doesn't realize (she totally knows and is over the moon about it)

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Natasha Romanoff

-loves trying new haircuts on a daily basis.

-had a phase in high school where she had bangs and dyed her hair crazy colors. is still recovering from it.

-at first, she was almost annoyed finding out she was the only female on the avengers. now, she couldn't care less.

-her and wanda go on shopping sprees at least once a month. its mandatory.

-finds little pleasure in sitting and watching tv, but enjoys it when its with people she likes.

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Bruce Banner

-unironically, his favorite color is green.

-loves wearing button-down shirts, but hates wearing suits. thinks that they are uncomfortable and too classy.

-afraid that he will hurt someone he loves as the hulk.

-his favorite weather is snow, but he dislikes rain.

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that's all for now!

my apologies since they kind of basic and there's not much for a few characters.

as this is my first post, any and all suggestions are sincerely appreciated. please feel free to ask for any hcs or send a fic prompts, I try my best to be frequently active.

have a great day!

[aaronmellor]

First time in the LA office - a new generative design spatial web company I’m involved with - www.HACKROD.com - The ability to AI / AR design & industrial scale 3D print fully working one off cars, bikes, anything... #TheRealTonyStark #StarkIndustries #hackrod #autonomo #design #ai #ar #argumentedreality #spatialweb #Ironman @hackrod_inc @felixholst (at Los Angeles, California) https://www.instagram.com/p/B5LlDpgFaB3/?igshid=957no3dxbet9

[turtle-steverogers]

Hey mikey, do you have and steve head cannons to share??? 👀

ooooo ok ok lemme thiiiink

so as far as social media goes, he’s only really active on twitter (think political sass)

but he DOES have an instagram and between him and bucky, bucky is much more of an... influencer, with polished posts and promotions and such

but steve has like 7 posts and they’re mostly of like,,, neat leaves he’s found on the ground, some of his art, and a few of like,,, sam, bucky, and natasha. there’s only one of him and it’s a selfie he took while eating an iron man popsicle and the caption is just: “@therealtonystark haha sucker”

[calmly-but-insanely]

Part 3 of Civil War Team Ironman on Social Media:

Tony Stark @TheRealTonyStark:

Just cause you can’t doesn’t mean I can’t. I am Tony Stark. Bask in my awesomeness and be grateful...

Stephen Strange @TheDoctor: Why does my husband seem to think that he can survive on coffee...

5.6M Likes 6.2M Retweets and Comments

[kassinwonderland]

I'm just a genius, playboy, billionaire philanthropist no big deal.. #therealtonystark #teamironman (at Marvel 29)

[nickachu2-blog]

Hahahahaha!! RDJ f'n rocks!!! #robertdowneyjr #therealtonystark #ironman #marvel #theavengers #nikchaveztheactor #nickachu #nickachutheactor

[tonystark-is-daddy-af-blog]

Avengers Group Chat

Wrote this on my phone while sitting in a waiting room, it's just for fun.... don't take it too seriously.... just enjoy! 😘 -------- Chat has started. Say hi! Rage_monster788: is everyone here? TheRealTonyStark: I'm liking the name Bruce, glad I was of some help. ;) eagle_eye: Yeah, yours didn't take much thought though. Way to use ur real name, Stark. TheRealTonyStark: ... and eagle_eye is so much better? Is hawk not good enough for you anymore? Nomad_1920: we all just need to relax. TheRealTonyStark: 1920, really Cap? You are old as balls. Nomad_1920: nomad was already taken... I had to add a number TheRealTonyStark: LOL, nomad isn't that great of the name to begin with. We get it you're not into the whole America thing anymore but cmon, nomad! Itsybitsyspider: cut it out stark. We're here to discuss business. Princess_leia_is_Bae: woah, who's the other spider in this chat? Itsybitsyspider: it's Nat, the one that's actually good at their job. Princess_leia_is_Bae: no need to get hostile now... I'm still learning.. Princess_leia_is_Bae: tell her Mr. Stark theWORTHYone: what does... bae mean? Wanda_and_vision_4ever: according to google, it's a colloquialism for the word "babe". Wanda_and_vision_4ever: this is Wanda now, how is everyone today? War-machine-666: Really? A joint account? You guys make me sick. Wanda_and_vision_4ever: it was Wanda's idea Wanda_and_vision4ever: ... and it was a great idea 💗 TheRealTonyStark: Rhodey! Nice touch with the 666, like war machine wasn't bad ass enough already. Rage_monster788: can we please just start the meeting? Is everyone here? Eye-of-the-panther: I've been silently waiting for you all to get it together. Practically fell asleep over here. 😒 Rage_monster788: okay, I'll let Mr. Captain Rogers take it away... nomad_1920: okay, so first we have to discuss the events that happened in Brazil this past week. ____Fuck-the-avengers has joined the chat___ TheRealTonyStark: who the fuck? Fuck-the-avengers: hey you guys, sorry I'm late, what did I miss? Princess_leia_is_Bae: babe, right now is not a good time I'm doing work stuff! Fuck-the-avengers: yeah but I'm pretty much an avenger too, I mean I can't really die LOL 😂 TheRealTonyStark: Peter, get your boyfriend out of this chat or I will 😡 Princess_leia_is_Bae: Wade, DM now! Fuck-the-avengers: oh yall know what that means 🍆🍆🍆🍆💩💩💩💦💦💦 ____TheRealTonyStark has banned Fuck-the-avengers from the group chat____ Princess_leia_is_Bae: uhhh... sorry about that guys... Nomad_1920: We'll discuss this later when I get home. eagle_eye: oooohhh Spidey's in trouble now lol _____TheRealTonyStark has banned eagle_eye from the group chat_____ Itsybitsyspider: TONY!!! TheRealTonyStark: oh cmon, you all know he gets on everyone's nerves. TheWORTHYone: That is true. ______Peters_fuck_buddy_69 has joined the chat____ Peters_fuck_buddy_69: Can't get rid of me that easy!! 😘😘😘 TheRealTonyStark: ah geez, fuck this. TheRealTonyStark left chat 7:00 pm TheWORTHYone left chat 7:01 pm Nomad_1920 left chat 7:01 pm Itsybitsyspider left chat 7:01 pm Eye-of-the-panther left chat 7:01 pm Rage_monster788 left chat 7:01 pm Wanda_and_vision4ever left chat 7:02 pm War-machine-666 left chat 7:02 pm Princess_leia_is_Bae: thanks a lot, Wade. Now everyone hates me. Peters_fuck_buddy_69: not me, I still love you smookie pookie 💗💗💗 Peters_fuck_buddy_69: bring that ass over, Daddy's feeling feisty tonight 💦🍆💗 Peters_fuck_buddy_69: I stole a couple beers from the corner store for us Peters_fuck_buddy_69: or was it from the old lady down the street? Peters_fuck_buddy_69: I forget, just come over, I'll be wearing my sexiest lingerie Peters_fuck_buddy_69: aka my skin 😛😛😛 Peters_fuck_buddy_69: see you soon pookie! Peters_fuck_buddy_69 left chat 7:06 pm. Princess_leia_is_Bae: well...fuck.

[ao3feed-buckybarnes]

Tony Stark Created Social Media Accounts

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2xeLr2r

by alizziema

Clint Barton @hawkeyeofthetiger

Fuck language.

20.6K Replies 319K Retweets 427K Likes

 Tony Stark @therealtonystark Replying to @hawkeyeofthetiger

Well I’m sorry, but you have a very misleading and honestly stupid name.

18.3K Replies 256K Retweets 411K Likes

 Clint Barton @hawkeyeofthetiger Replying to @therealtonystark

At least I didn’t get maimed by a 16-year-old girl.

20.3K Replies 276K Retweets 412K Likes

 Tony Stark @therealtonystark Replying to @hawkeyeofthetiger

Fuck you Barton.

22.9K Replies 307K Retweets 455K Likes

 Clint Barton @hawkeyeofthetiger Replying to @therealtonystark

Yes. Fuck me.

...

That’s what she said.

23.6K Replies 346K Retweets 561K Likes

Words: 1280, Chapters: 1/10, Language: English

Series: Part 3 of The Avengers are dorks and I refuse to believe otherwise

Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/M

Characters: Tony Stark, Steve Rodgers, Natasha Romanoff, Clint Barton, Sam Wilson, Thor, Bucky Barnes, Bruce Banner, Vision (Marvel), Wanda Maximoff, Shuri (Marvel), T'Challa (Marvel), Peter Parker, Ned Leeds, Flash Thompson, Michelle Jones

Relationships: Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Bruce Banner/Natasha Romanov, Clint Barton/Laura Barton, Michelle Jones/Peter Parker, brunhilde/thor, Wanda Maximoff/Vision

Additional Tags: Humor, semi crack, The Avengers discover social media, Bucky Needs New Friends, Sam's an idiot, Clint's an idiot, Everybody loves Steve, One Big Happy Family, Let sam marry kfc, seriously, I'm starting a petition, Peter's a cute lil bean, Peter and Shuri Friendship, Twitter usage, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, i'm trash, this is just self indulgent trash, But I'm told it's funny, Sam and bucky friendship, Tony Stark is a savage, Peter is a Gen Z icon, fight me

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2xeLr2r

[calmly-but-insanely]

Part 1 of Team Ironman on social Media:

The Kid @PotatoGunKid: Tony Stark act like he’s all that but we BOTH KNOW HE CRIES HIMSELF TO SLEEP!!!

Tony Stark @TheRealTonyStark:...

...

...

Is this cause I ate your Donut? I said I was sorry...

The Kid @PotatoGunKid: My revenge is near...

[kassinwonderland]

Omg my baby is sooo pretty, just got my arc reactor from England and it's so gorgeous I'm going to cry 😭❤️❤️❤️ #therealtonystark #proofihaveaheart #teamironman (at Marvel 29)