#there's so much knowledge out there to be learned and things to try out how are you supposed to do this all in one lifetime?
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latveriansnailmail · 1 hour ago
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This post actually gave me weird dreams.
My lock screen is Shirley Manson of Garbage. I'm a rl postman and in my dream I discovered that Shirley lives on my route. I tried to keep a respectful professional distance, in part because I was worried about being too annoying of a fan. When you're a postman you learn all kinds of things about people even when you're actively trying to keep your nose out-- it's creepy the things I know and it's never my business so I'm honestly trying to NOT know.
In the case of Shirley I learned that she practices an obscure form of art therapy (that my dream totally made up) called colouro-something with many syllables, where you take a relief sculpture made from intricate thin lines (not far off from Celtic knotwork) and color the lines, blending color shades as you go and sort of braiding the colors. The colors reflect your inner life and reveal your trauma, causing you to sort of untangle it. I also learned that Shirley had lost a child at some point in her life outside of the limelight and was still quite haunted over the loss. So in addition to already being Shirley Manson she also had that to deal with.
With trepidation I decided to learn about colouro-syllables and start practicing it. I made inroads with the local colouro- community with which Shirley was semi-active and started practicing it and socializing with them. Colouro-syllables in local practice had an informal group therapy element where we would get coffee and tea after the meeting, touch base with each other, and discuss our work and what it was revealing. HOWEVER I knew that part of my motivation in getting involved was to form a commonality and a friendly connection to Shirley and I had a lot of conflict navigating if I was overstepping her privacy with my privileged postal knowledge. This point is particularly critical to me on a personal level because my father in real life is a schizophrenic with a lifelong obsession with Agnetha from Abba. It's really alarming and oh wow do I never want to be that, much less be that TO a person I admire.
But that was the core of the dream: trying to become friends with Shirley Manson but also trying not to overstep her privacy in a dynamic where I already knew too much because of my position. And learning how to untangle my personal trauma through art therapy along the way.
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vigilskeep · 2 days ago
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ok but can you elaborate on what you mean by the game's villainization of vivienne being weirdly spiteful? i love vivienne but i've always struggled to articulate what i find about her portrayal to be so frustrating. it's like they set her up to fail?
vivienne has a personal quest where they lay a trap that is more for the player with meta knowledge than it is for the player character. your mage companion asks for ingredients for a mysterious potion. you’re supposed to remember anders and morrigan and be suspicious, and to follow hints that the game artifically forces, with vivienne’s notes being deliberately written to be misconstrued and the quest title’s reference to the evil queen in snow white, to maybe believe that this is a potion of youth and beauty. which would be Shallow and Wrong, btw. all this is done for the game’s right, if you choose to deceive vivienne, to gleefully say ha! she did have a reason! you didn’t expect THAT, did you? this is on you, the player, for assuming what we artifically set up for you to assume. or if you choose to support her, to say wow... the Ice Queen did just have feelings after all... isn’t this groundbreaking of us...
a companion’s personal quest is basically the one chance we have in dai (beyond walking around for 400 hours collecting every banter) to get to know them on a deeper level. dai affords vivienne like two or three cutscenes and spends them on... that. bizarrely self-congratulory for the shocking twist of vivienne being a person with feelings.
here’s a trespasser epilogue slide that really gets at me! these are about cassandra.
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leliana, who she disagrees with on every point, she can work with in mutual respect. but vivienne, who has much closer politics to hers? vivienne, who approves of the inquisitor agreeing to support cassandra as divine? well, she’s disgusting. not to mention, there are worldstates where cassandra is divine where the blame for violence against the mages is still placed on vivienne: “Fortunately, Grand Enchanter Vivienne grudgingly agreed not to destroy [the rebel mages’] terrified leaders, as a personal favor to Divine Victoria.” oh thank god we have the merciful fucking seeker cassandra pentaghast to protect us from the woman who talks constantly about how mages being able to learn in safety is her goal
sorry i’ll try not to get bitchy. those are just a couple glaring instances that really get to me. vivienne is such a compelling character setup and has really interesting dialogue about her perspective but the game goes out of its way to deliberately present her in a poor light, not just in-world through fellow characters’ perspectives but also through quest titles & epilogue slides, the “objective” authorial text of the game itself. why is vivienne treated like this when we pretend cassandra is more progressive just because she uses the word change sometimes? would wynne, another circle mage companion with extremely similar politics, be treated like this?
if we focus on it as a mage politics question, i think dai almost scapegoats vivienne in its attempts to rebalance the mage conflict towards the templars. in dai, the templars suffer through noble sacrifices in sympathetic manly silence, misguided and led astray, tormented by the hardships magic has dealt them. but just to show we know the circles are bad, just because we know you have frustration to vent, here’s the true believer to pin all the blame on: the loyalist mage, who knows exactly what she’s chosen to support. (gasp, aren’t we so clever for subverting your expectations. the mage believes in the circles! the elf doesn’t like elves! we’ve ended stereotyping! if you think about it, this is on you, the player, for assuming.)
but the internal dragon age politics thing is almost a sidenote when compared to the obvious. it would be ridiculous to leave unspoken that this is about race and it’s the black woman who is so cruelly and dismissively written while the story bends over backwards to let you sympathise with white characters. especially when we’re talking about how it’s meant to be a surprise that she has feelings; you should look up other resources on this than a white tumblr user if you’re not familiar but the “strong black woman” who doesn’t get to have the softness, vulnerability, and sensitivity that other women are afforded, and who gives support but doesn’t need to be treated with care by others, is a harmful stereotype that kind of has to be brought up when you’re talking about why vivienne is written the way she is
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rooksamoris · 2 days ago
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rewatching castlevania and like... malleus as vlad and reader as lisa.
i think dracula and malleus are quite similar. both don't quite open up until they meet someone who is not scared of them. similarly, while vlad is amused by lisa's goodwill towards humanity, malleus is fascinated by yuu's fearlessness.
i think they're comparable in the shallow sense, lonely and intimidating with wealth and knowledge beyond compare, but they also share this honor between them. i think back to that woman dracula warns in the beginning of his revenge, because he knew lisa had meant something dear to her. lisa tried to instill noblesse oblige in him, this idea that with all of his excess, he had a duty to give back to the world. sparing that old woman was the last true act he committed in her memory, before he was ultimately defeated.
malleus throughout the story learns similar lessons. he is faced with how short life truly is and instead of enjoying what he can have, he dwells on the upcoming death of lilia. in his efforts to keep all of the things he loves, he forgets to treasure what time he did have. his overblot is a lesson in how we waste so much time neglecting the present.
i think malleus's overblot teaches the lessons that stoic philosophers such as epictetus and seneca have been trying to teach us for centuries. you will only be free once you can accept that some things are completely out of your control, and focus on what you can control. this lesson appears a lot in dracula as well.
dracula is misguided in his search for retribution for the murder of lisa, and malleus is misguided in his vicious attempt to force everyone to be with him forever due to his fear of losing that which he holds dear.
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fiamat12 · 1 day ago
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Quick PSA: Haters/ in fighting
I'm a lover not a fighter - hard outer shell, soft on the inside. I can be biting. But then I'm the first one to give someone grace - i.e. my partner despises A and I'm always the one saying "we don't know everything that happened, she's young, etc." lol.
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I do use the block button mostly to protect my mental & emotional well-being. If you've read my blog long enough, you know that I often block those who support those who hate on me. Simple enough, eh? So, I want to clarify recent events...
There's a Lukola blogger who came at me in the past few weeks. She doesn't say who she's talking about in her post(s) - and maybe she thought it wouldn't get back to me since I don't follow her - but a friend noticed it is clearly pointed at me, per the content.
1- She's taken things I said in dms we exchanged and made blog posts to try to prove me wrong. She 100% mischaracterized what I said/ took what I said out of context to make me look like the bad guy. Fair? Not so much. Shady? I'd say so.
2- She's made posts based on my followers' Asks. One of the Asks supported my pov and thereby debunked hers (see below*), so she felt the need to write about it, frame it is as "nuance" and then proclaim that she won't be silenced.
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MY GOD!!! No one is silencing anyone! We ALL have the opportunity to have our voices heard on our own unique blogs, and it's a beautiful thing! But you know what's not? Jealousy, projection, hypocrisy, and vengeance. If we've learned nothing from the Lukola saga, haven't we at least learned that?
She initially reached out to me re: N's pregnancy and expressed a need to "mobilize" Lukolas. The message was significantly late to the party (weeks away from N giving birth), and I was not and am not going to mobilize Lukolas against anyone. This is a shipping blog not a war vessel. Yes, even the Jakolas & Antlukes are entitled to their opinion.
My response:
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I won't go into any more detail so as not to air her dirty laundry (I won't hesitate to do so later if needed 🤷🏼‍♀️), but I will just say this: I eventually ended up blocking her blog because imo, she was spreading misinformation w/ her posts and her knowledge base was lacking as a newer blogger. I also wasn't in line w/ her fanaticism.
That's MY CHOICE - and you all know, w/ my background, how I feel about hearsay/ unfounded theory. People were messaging me pissed about what she was purporting at the time; we've already gone through this w/ MPOV in the early days w/ misconceptions that still linger, that are not favorable to Lukola.
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Anyhow, she dmed me on Discord when she realized she was blocked, saying it felt "like a punishment", and that I did so because her pov "complicated the narrative"... no, it's because it was inaccurate and I didn't want it on my feed. I've already spent innumerable hours/ days/ mos. w/ my partner a year ago unraveling an extremely complicated set of facts to make sense of things. Just because you're new doesn't mean I have to go backwards, esp. when we've had confirmation that what we concluded is likely true.
She also claimed to have " No hard feelings. Just moving forward" yet here we are after a month.
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⬆️ Just like this Anon, I've not read or followed her blog since early May. But because she seemed upset and claimed I was denying her the value of my pov (her words), I unblocked her. She's obviously now blocked again, as I consider her (as of late at least) to be no different than the toxic troll.
If you think I'm the problem because I prefer to mind my own business, curate my own blog, be as accurate as possible w/ information, post things I care about / am passionate about and protect my peace, I don't know what to tell you. All the Lukolas who have come for me this past year (and yes, there have been several) have one thing in common - they chose to talk shite about me, unprovoked. And yes, I consider that divisive. I also consider theory that reads like Fanfic yet positioned as plausible, irresponsible.
I will agree w/ her on one thing: always question everything, esp. the quality of people you let into your orbit (I bet we could ask L a thing or two about that). As for one of my own mantras: Always trust your instincts!!! We've been gaslit as Lukolas long enough... ✌️
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*The aforementioned blog post ⬇️
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beatrice-otter · 1 day ago
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The thing is, a lot of people ... fundamentally don't understand how the study of history works. They assume that there is some unbiased, neutral, and complete database of Facts About The Way Things Used To Be, and that studying history is about memorizing those facts and then regurgitating them. And that's not even in the same ballpark as the truth.
We learn new shit about the past all the fucking time. There are several reasons for this.
Up through the first half of the 20th Century, the vast majority of historians worked on the Great Man theory of history, where you look at the powerful men and study them and that's what history is. They didn't look very often at ordinary people, and when they did, it was usually in the context of how that affected the Great Men. Consequently, they missed a lot of stuff! Historians have been working like beavers for the last seventy years or so trying to fill in the gaps and rectify things, but there's a lot of space and time (and people!) to cover, so there's a lot of stuff that historians are only just now getting around to looking at (or haven't looked at yet).
We have a lot of techniques now that we developed fairly recently to study things besides "written documents that have survived to the present". Archaeology! Genetics! Historical linguistics! Lots of other things! We are learning so much through these techniques, and finding out a lot of information that we had no way of knowing before we developed them.
Some eras of the recent past we have far more information than anybody could possibly sort through. We've had that information in the archives since it was created, but unless somebody goes through and looks at it, we have no clue what's in there ... and ten different people can go through that same data set and find ten different new things, depending on what they're focusing on and what questions they're trying to answer.*
I'm sure there are more reasons than this, I'm just an amateur historian, but these are the biggies that jump to mind.
So "what we know about the past" changes all the time. Even if what you learned in school was a complete and unbiased summation of what was known at the time you were in school (lol), we know a shitton more now.
But if (as a lot of people assume), that there is and has always been an unbiased, neutral, and complete database of Facts About The Way Things Used To Be ... then the only way for history books to change is people manipulating them. If the sum total of knowledge cannot change, then a change in what we teach must be based on politics rather than actual historical fact.
But that's bullshit, because we know more than we used to, and we're learning more all the time.
*Here's an example of someone looking at data and getting a different set of information out of it because they asked different questions: in the US, "women's history" and "black history" tend to be studied by different people; women's history tends to be studied by white women. Women's history looked at the antebellum south and said that white women whose families owned slaves had no agency over that because when women married, all of their property legally became their husband's. Black history focused on oral narratives by formerly enslaved people, which are chock full of stories about white women as the primary one in control of the slaves. Stephanie Jones-Rogers looked at the discrepancy, and started looking at legal documents and bills of sale relating to enslaved people in South Carolina, and found that 40% of all sales of enslaved people involved a white woman as either seller or buyer. Because, legally, a woman's property became her husband's unless he signed a contract before the marriage saying she could keep it, and it was common in South Carolina for rich people to give their sons land and their daughters slaves (so that both husband and wife had part of the family finances in their control), and then require the husband to let the wife keep ownership of her slaves. Other people have looked at those court records and bills of sale! But nobody had looked at them while asking the question "what was the role of white women in slavery?" So when Dr. Jones-Rogers did it, she learned something we did not know before.
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cultkinkcoven · 1 day ago
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“It’s just the way that you record your conversations makes it seem like Lucifer is talking to you directly and that’s not possible.”
I’m gonna ask you all something that might sound really wild.
Have you ever tried it? Like no, seriously.
Have you ever actually just written everything down? No filler, just pure communication. Ask. Answer.
Actually. I’m serious. Have you done it? How many times have you attempted it, how consistently?
Have you ever entered into the ritual space, into a meditation, into a trance, into an operation, with the intention of recording whatever you receive, regardless of if it makes sense? Have you ever just listened?- not just with your ears, but with your everything?
Do you trust your God?
Can you truly submit to them without needing to have control?
Do you trust yourself? Have you learned how to?
Are you comfortable with the possibility of getting it wrong? Of failing and having to try again? Of having to be consistent and keep practicing until it is right?
Are you comfortable with the prospect that sometimes, there really is nothing? Sometimes, you are unsuccessful, and you have to take that failure and try again tomorrow.
Are you comfortable with the prospect that it takes devotion?
Don’t get me wrong, you should be using tools. I use tools: tarot, dice, sticks, pendulums, etc. Results that are replicable across multiple mediums are stronger than those that aren’t. Messages that I am unsure of can be verified with tools and tests. People who aren’t able to or uncomfortable channeling or sensing using their bodies are just as capable of doing great work with tools.
But have you ever genuinely just tried to strengthen that muscle? Your own ability to perceive and locate. Your ability to identify your God’s voice and differentiate it from your own?
How often have you practiced that?
My writings sound direct? Thats the goal. To filter through all of the other noise and get down to the most important point, the symbol, the message, the reason why I came in the first place. When I experience these conversations or events they are abstract, messy. When I write them down and read them out in plain text, it becomes clear. Individual insights reveal an entire message, an entire concise conversation- and that is what is valuable for me to document. When it tracks, it tracks, and there is infinite value in recognizing when it tracks.
I enter into a space of trust. I ask him. I record what I receive. Not necessarily the image, the sensation, the synchronization, the result of the dice roll, but the idea. The message, the core. What is he trying to tell me? What is he revealing now that I previously did not know? What can I learn from this response?
Later I get to interpret. I get to realize “that shit made absolutely no sense” or “holy shit this makes a lot more sense now” or even, “nope, that was me not him, I got distracted, I influenced too much, I need to try that again.”
If you think these things are impossible, maybe just try it. Maybe it won’t be for you, maybe that’s not the kind of craft you’re personally meant to partake in, maybe you have other talents. But I always think it’s so interesting when people claim this act is impossible. 1 because, offline, in very established cults and organizations- this is very common knowledge- everyone kind of understands how this works- but 2, because it usually comes from people who would never really be in the position to experience it even if it was real.
At some point in my practice I stopped caring about proving magic. It’s one of those 101 things, proof is great, don’t get me wrong. But impact, that’s the gold. Can I prove in any real way that Lucifer said anything to me? No- not really. But I do feel my mind shift and I do have that “holy shit- wait” moment, and I do learn something, I do leave that ritual different than I entered. And my questions are answered. And I return because I trust he will answer me again. That’s faith.
So yes, my communication does seem direct. I challenge you, even just as an experiment, to record your next communicative session in a very plain and direct way. What did you want to know? What do you think they said? Take as long as it takes. Sometimes you won’t get an answer for a whole hour. Sometimes it’ll feel like there’s so much you can’t write fast enough. Sometimes you fail and need to try again later. That’s the beauty of the game.
Try it.
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claralance · 2 days ago
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Thinking about...
Your first date with Barou featuring Ubers! (Part 1/2)
Honestly I love Ubers and I love that they helped dye Barou's hair so I hc that they also insisted on helping him getting ready for his first date.
After Barou finally asked you out on a real, proper date (the whole team'd been waiting for months since they learned about his crush), they nagged him for the whole day before, fussing over him despite his death threats.
Barou'd probably die before he ever admitted that he needed help, but he had zero experience in romance, and apparently just a big ego and lots of confidence wouldn't cut it in a relationship, especially with someone he cared for deeply like you. He wanted it to be perfect, wanted you to be treated like royalty, and the King wouldn't settle for less.
Honestly, I don't think he was that much of a stubborn prick, like, he had his own rules and would definitely try to project them on others (also a very selfish, hard-headed, short tempered person in most situations), but he wasn't the kind to not being open to learn and improve, especially if it benefited him.
So, after a little persuasive speech from Aiku, the King caved, begrudgingly, and he allowed his teammates to help (help, not meddle) just a little.
As a result, we had Aryu picking out clothes and doing his hair and even some skin care (they begged him to ditch the hair gel which Lorenzo'd hidden in God knew where), making sure that Barou was gonna be "the most stylish" man on the streets that evening.
Then there was Niko looking up dates ideas and locations, activities that, according to his knowledge in anime and online, are the pinnacle of romance. The boy even made a playlist of cheesy love songs which Barou couldn't get mad at though he found those songs way too sappy for his liking's.
What's more? Well, Aiku and Sendou (mostly Aiku), of course, tried to give out some dating advice based on their experiences. Y'know, the typical how to talk to girls, some grand gestures and a few pick up lines and whatnot (also some tips in bed, which resulted in them getting yelled at). Barou found those utterly ridiculous and stupid, he knew how to be a gentleman on his own just fine, but he secretly kept them in mind, just in case.
It took the whole afternoon just for the preparation, but at the end of it everyone was pleased with the results of their handiworks. Barou was satisfied as well, of course, since his teammates actually helped and suggested things that he was confident and comfortable with instead of forcing him to be some Prince Charming that he wasn't.
And of course, right before he went to pick you up, Snuffy pulled him aside for "the talk". If it wasn't out of respect, Barou would've snapped and left already, but, much to his obvious annoyance and the scowl on his face, he reluctantly sat through it, even if he knew damn well that he would never did anything without careful consideration, and to you of all people. That was the most uncomfortable conversation in his life, honestly.
Now he just needed to go and not fuck this up.
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They're so silly I just need them together again.
Also my long fics flop so bad every time i hope this won't i'm struggling T_T
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palmolli · 8 hours ago
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SKSW ZELINK IS MY ROMAN EMPIRE!!!!
So I've already made a post like this, but like... sksw Zelink makes me violently ill. But like in a good way. They are an existential NIGHTMARE. And they drive me ABAOLUTKEKEY INSANE.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Here's basically how I view it:
Zelda was supposed to be the main character. Not Link. Link was basically just the love interest in her story. It's the Legend of Zelda, not Link, lol. In the game itself, Link was never supposed to fight Demise, he wasn't even supposed to be the one to use the triforce. Hylia reincarnated into a mortal for the sole reason of using the power of the Triforce against Demise's wrath. Link was only supposed to be a fallback plan. Yet they both fell for each other.
Imagine being Link. Your best friend in the whole wide world goes missing one day. She was basically all you had. You saw it happen and you couldn't do anything about it. You keep replaying the scene in your head over and over again, wishing you could've just caught her hand. But you couldn't. Then you learn she's still alive. There's still hope to get the one light in your life back. You don't hesitate to take up the sword. Losing your best friend is more horrifying than whatever awaits you on the surface. You follow her through old temples, slaying beasts left and right, and when you finally catch up to her, her words break your heart and explode your brain. She's really a goddess reborn. And you, nothing but her chosen hero. You still love her, and it hurts.
Imagine being Zelda. You've just fallen from the world you once knew. You're lost and confused. Only guided by a mysterious yet familiar stranger. You're told you're not who you thought you were. The life you were so familiar with shatters before your eyes. The girl you thought you were shatters with it. A piece of that life follows you down. Turns out he was just a pawn in your game. You used the person you love. But he doesn't care. He's willing to shed blood for your sake. Whether it's his or another's. It scares you. You don't exactly know why. Maybe it's because he was the only familiar thing in this new world, but now he's changed. He's no longer that lazy boy you had to drag out of his bed since you were just kids. He's no longer the boy you had to speak up for because he was too shy to do so with his own voice. You still love him, and it hurts.
PLEEEAAAZESSEEE AAUUUUUUGHHHH, I NEED TO SQUEEZE THEM LIKE DOG TOYS NOOOWWWWWW.
LIKE SERIOUSLY, BARELY ANYONE TALKS ABOUT THE ACTUAL DEPTHS OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP. EVERY EDIT OF THEM JUST TURNS INTO "ahaha, we get reincarnated to love each other in every lifetime!!! Teehee!!"
NO. SHUT UP!!!!! It is SO much more than that to me. The COMPLEXITIES. The CONFLICT. THE EXISTENTIAL DREAD.
They're the only Link and Zelda pair aware of the cycle. They were the very first. They planted the seed for what eventually grew into Hyrule. They lived and died with the knowledge that their people would never know peace. They are essentially the Adam and Eve of Hylian lore. That has never been explored in the Zelda canon, and it pisses me off sm.
ALSOOOO the very idea of once being a GOD in a past life and having the memories of one... it's almost incomprehensible. Same with dating said used to be God. If you try too hard to wrap your head around it, it'll unravel your mind. That is genuinely some kinda form of existential horror or something. Arrrrghhhhhhhh... they make me so violent...
Also... Zelda's soul is still divine. Link's isn't. What happens to them after death? Do NOT reply with "Oh, they get reincarnated as the other future Zeldas and Links!" Because... there's literally in game evidence of two Zeldas and two Links existing at once, which wouldn't be possible if they were the same person reincarnated. One. Botw Zelda and the Hylia statues. Two. The hero's shade and tp Link??? THREE. The og Zelda and the adventure of Link Zelda.
Hylia still exists after Skyward Sword... but where's her Link? Did he pass on and leave her behind? I genuinely don't think he would do that. I think Hylia's ghost is sealed away in the Sacred Realm, because the golden three thought she was too weak to exist in the normal realm. Separating her from her Link. He still lingers, somewhere... but she can't find him. Though she sees his face in every child that wields the blade he had cherished so dearly. She sees his face in every single one of their daughters that shares her name.
I think I could go on for hours, actually. I am so NOT normal about them.
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isle-of-misfit-joys · 3 days ago
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well the history of universities is the history of bourgeoisie educational structures and historically, these institutions have only somewhat been invested in the systematization of knowledge, and have mostly been occupied in aiding the feudal and then the capitalist project, on the side of our overlords. there are many standing critiques of these structures and i may dig some up later but it is somewhat tangental to my present point
systematized knowledge is not the same thing as a university education. and in many ways, a university education can get in the way of a REAL EDUCATION. take me for example i have a B.A. in psychology from a western uni. and that shit aint real. like it is a degree in wishes and unreplicatabale data and phrenology and racism more than anything else. it hampered me by saddling me with a bunch of misapprehensions, one of which was the notion that i had actually received an education. which i very much did not i am 30 and i learned how to use a notebook forreals this year i am not joking to you.
the idea that systematizing knowledge (in limited sectors) can be useful is not uniquely communist you are correct --> it's just that communists are the furthest out on this branch of the tree of knowledge. they have built the most, got the farthest, etc. however you want to say it
and the way communists accomplished that, is by applying the scientific method to EVERYTHING. like actually everything. and by doing so, and the trial and error process that came out of doing so, constructed a framework for looking at the structure of human knowledge and endevour itself
having that framework now, has changed my life for the better. it immediately improved my life! it changed the way i move through the world!
if you would like to argue with me about what i am reading i would genuinely love for you to read this book along side me. the more we argue like this, the deeper all of our understanding becomes. and this space is now a sounding board for my life's work. so expect to see more of this
this book was rec'd to me by a friend and i am still working through it. i am only 4ish months into the reading so like, you do not have a ton of legwork to do to catch up to me if you have not started this reading already (if you have, i apologize! i am trying to be a bridge and not to condescend. hopefully the link is useful to somebody)
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seriously considering raffling off hodgepoge. would anybody be interested?
she'd be sold as is
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milli-moi · 2 days ago
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For all the Agathario writers out there: I am surprised no one has written this as a full piece yet actually but it would be cool to see it done well.
There are so many fics which give Rio a penis, whether that’s through magic strap ons, just magic, or Rio just happening to have a penis.
My feelings on this are two-fold, on one hand I think it sadly says a lot about what people are taught about sex. It’s as though a lot of people don’t know how to write a sex scene with two female characters without a penis-esque part (pun not intended but valid).
I know this could also be reasonably true since there are a lot of babies (aka those who are younger than Millenials and/or never had video tapes as a part of their childhood) in this fandom and we should welcome the babies! The babies were (I imagine at least for those similar in age to me -32-25ish) once us, who found a safe space in fanfic in order to explore and discover our own sexualities and gender identities.
The other side is the one I want to ask for help with. There is more trans representation now in safe spaces, and here is my request which I think would be a great read for both baby queers and the older, less-inaugurated queers too. I will admit I didn’t realise how much societally- spoon fed transphobia I had until my partner came out as non-binary and it’s changed a lot of my thought process but it was also pretty tough at points too.
I’d love someone to write a Trans or intersex Rio. It would most likely have to be a modern au, but that doesn’t have to mean taking magic out of it. It would be a really cool thing to have Rio and Agatha enter into a relationship to begin with where Agatha doesn’t know that the contents of Rio’s pants aren’t what she expected them to be. It would be cool to see Rio trying to edge information out of Agatha, try and see if the woman she is falling for very fast would be accepting of her genitalia. I’d love to see an Agatha who isn’t sure.
I’ve always written Agatha a bit like myself (lesbian who as a teen planned to marry a guy who I liked as a friend, tolerate sex so I could have kids, but the idea of putting that in my mouth, or even really touching it… nope!) but she doesn’t have to be averse to the idea, or maybe she is but she works slowly to overcome that fear and feeling as Rio is working to show that (or those) part(s) of her body to Agatha. It would be really beautiful and sweet to see them build a relationship and see Agatha become the fierce ally that she is (similar to what I’ve become I guess)
Could even go with an intersex Rio managing to get Agatha pregnant, creating the miracle that is Nicky in another way.
I have a lot of thoughts about this and I have some knowledge - my partner was encouraging me to try it, saying I do have some of the insight - but I don’t feel like I have enough insight into the male anatomy side of it. So I’m putting the beacons up! Anyone who wants to use this idea please,please do, and please tell me!! I want to read it.
I’d also happily help with some of my personal experience if wanted for someone to write this but the biggest thing is I’d love to see it be done!
Signal boost this to all the AAA fanfic writers out there!
Tl;dr:
Wanted: Agathario fanfic written with a pretty gay Agatha meeting and falling in love with a trans/intersex Rio, learning about their body differences and learning to work with them. A story about their relationship which also encompasses trans/intersex storylines and deals with learning to love a partner’s body because it’s theirs.
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apollonia4 · 3 days ago
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☆Walk the runway!☆
MC is a famous model in the human world - how do they act about it? ((Younger brothers version))
Genre: fluff, gn¡MC
Pt.1
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SATAN
☆ Satan wouldn't call himself the biggest fan of high fashion but he wasn't uniterested in it either. He craved knowledge so he was always to learn and see new things. He always admired your sense of fashion, whenever you dressed on some ocassion, you always did it with style.
☆ He found out about your actual career when he was watching cat videos (as usual). It was pretty much his bedtime tradition. He usually gets very annoyed with adds but not this time. When he saw you in that perfume advertisement he complitely forgot about the cats.
☆ He did not want to wake you up but just you know he was excited as he could ever be. He couldn't wait to get to know this side of you so he spent the rest of the evening reading about you online.
☆ When you got time for eachother he asked you all the questions, how are the shows done, how do they film comercials, how is it in the industry? You had a long conversation late into the night which you both enjoyed greatly.
☆ From then, he was always looking forward to see you on his screen before his priceless cat videos. He'll also observe and analyze every outfit he sees you wearing. He'd also be eager and willing to assist or watch you during your job.
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ASMODEUS
☆ He is deeply rooted in the fashion industry and we all know that. He's ahead of the trends, he always knows what to wear and what'll be in vogue. He had a hunch you were up to something down in your human world bussines. He saw how you looked and posed in pictures and how you fared on the ocassional photoshoots you did together.
☆ He discovered you when he was searching through media and encountered a interview with you during some fashion event. He imidiately squealed with excitement but then again, how did he not realize?!
☆ Best believe Asmo's gonna cling to you until he knows all about your "new side". You talk even more about fashion now, spending countless hours in his room, thinking of outfits to fit every single color among his vast collection of nail polishes.
☆ He gets you to show him how the makeup is done backstage (or at least try to recreate it) so he could see how they use the products in the human realm. You have plenty of fun together, making the others a bit jealous.
☆ Somehow he always knew you were both meant to shine together, to bask in the praise and love of others who could only dream of your confidence and energy.
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BEELZEBUB
☆ Beel admired your determination. You both shared a hobby of working out so you often exercised together. You were always persistent in your routine, like you were insisted on keeping your body a certain way.
☆ It always seemed a little weird to him, so he decided to ask you if you have a motive in all this. When he found out you're a model, it's like something clicked in his brain.
☆ It all made sense. The way you would spend extra time to perfect your look, help him pick out clothes for certain events.
☆ Beel was dazed with you, he would get shy while watching your interviews or shows on his DDD in the privacy of his room (not in a creepy way I swear).
☆ He would always hype you up when the two of you would go out, telling you you look beautiful and admiring the way you carry yourself. Whatever you did, your partner was your biggest supporter.
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BELPHEGOR
☆ Belphie wouldn't really admit it but he was absolutely smitten with you. To him you were the most beautiful, most brave and interesting person he ever met.
☆ He didn't know about your career but he would find about it in a curious way. While looking through his phone he encountered an article about a drama involving a celebrity. The celebrity being you.
☆ Turns out you had come out of your way to criticize one of the biggest figures in the fashion industry for being a terrible person who treats people like garbage in the workplace.
☆ He smirked when he heard your sharp tounge, so familiar. He felt pride for the way you didn't regret your words but also because of who you were. He respected your work greatly.
☆ When he confronted you about it, there was a little shyness in his voice (just like his twin I swear) like he's having a crush on you all over again despite the fact you two are already dating. If you ask him if he'd like to come and watch you work, he'd say no but we all know he does. And he will.
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Uhhhh this one took FOREVER..got a bit of a writers block back there but will push through it ♡♡
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puhpandas · 4 months ago
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Hii Percy!! I'm curious- what would be your ideal fnaf game after SOTM releases?
HI CHIP!! of course theres so many things I want to see after waiting so long but honestly I think a ggy game is what I'm expecting next. honest to god anything ranging from vanny!cassie to ggy and all the (human and not Cassies dad) characters in between I would be very happy with. it's why I'm so excited for sotm to finally release and end the mimic incorporation era. literally everything else it has left to cover are things that I would love
but yeah I think a ggy game would be absolutely hype and is actually very likely because of the THREE references/easter eggs weve gotten for him in a row!! I'm very excited to see what they're doing for him because damn ggy for Gregory's backstory has gone untouched for so long
I would love to see it explored in a campaign scenario of Gregory himself finding out about it but tbh I'm honestly expecting some prequel game about it that mostly just confirms it exists and expands upon content we dont know about from ggy like Rabs design and how he interacts with vanny. campaign would obviously be so much better for everyone involved but any ggy content is a win in my book
#it fundamentally cant be as boring as what sotm is doing if they go the game mostly about book content route#because theres a lot more freedom with ggy and things that we dont know about him that they can expand upon#and give everyone new content for#but i guess what i really want for ggy is for them to treat it like a present day campaigh#where its treated as a 'reveal' and not just boringly confirming information#like i want to see in universe as a story gregory reacting to and learning about his past#its so possible#HONESTLY if i got into it i could say my dream scenario is a ggy/gregorys backstory plotline in the big vanny!cassie villain game#where in between the campaign for the main storyline of savinf cassie#gregory learns about ggy#like that would be peak to me#but realistically we're prob gonna get 1 game exploring it and confirming it and giving us congent that fills in the gaps#which OF COURSE would be a huge win#but i just want it to affect the story in any way possible so bad#i want to see how it affects gregory#i want to know for sure confirmed if gregory really does have amnesia or not and if he rememebrs ggy#its all so interesting and it has so much potential#i feel like theres actually a good chance they could do a campaign bc gregorys mystery and mysterious backstory has#always been a huge deal about his character and like his main thing going on#so like they actually COULD try and do a storyline abt it instead of just confirming it#id be totally happy if they did a ggy campaign of gregory finding out as its own game first#outside of vanny!cassie plotline game and when that arrives gregory has knowledge abt ggy so he goes about thjngs differently#as well for sure.#literally in any way shape or form if they did a campaign present day post-sb game revealing ggy to the audience AND gregory#that would be my best case scenario#but once again truly anything that isnt mimic or Cassies dad will make me so happy#pandas.txt#pandas asks#pre ggy game#pre security breach 2
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cerbreus · 1 month ago
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theres a lotta things i wanted to do this year but I think the thing that would help me the most is to like. start personal projects that make me enjoy my work again. x( i wanna be excited about game development and making games again, it really helped me push myself to learn and get better and this stagnating just feels terrible. Knowing what I'm capable of but not being able to set on the path to getting there.
#i unfortunately thrive in group settings with other passionate ppl#my work is not really a collaborative group setting#and my senior thesis project really burnt me out and kinda killed some of that joy#if i wanna keep in this career i need to figure out how to consistently stay driven#i should be modeling or texturing or sculpting or creating things every day#even just an hour a day#also if i want to be able to do more stuff that i can use in my portfolio i just need to get a lot quicker at making things#so i can justify my work to my boss#that + proper photogrammetry would b really useful#personal stuff#i never had any illusions about where i would go with this degree#i never really thought nor planned to get into any large studios working on huge games#i don't hate where i am with my job and that we do really meaningful stuff is incredible#i just wish it felt like any of it was MY work :/#i feel so disconnected from what I make and it's hard for me to feel pride in it#i gotta settle this out this year or get started on a new career path#and just let this be a personal thing for personal projects#the imposter syndrome is real too#by all rights i am fairly knowledgeable about what i do and i can be pretty quick learning new pipelines and texturing methods#i just am fighting executive dysfunction all hours of the day#i feel like i get so little done so slowly compared to so many other people#i see other ppl's portfolios and I feel embarrassed that I'm not at their level#im a 'its never too late to learn' person but man it feels like i'll just never catch up in terms of skill and speed and consistent output#every time i try to reassure myself it just falls flat. they had mentors but not everybody had mentors and they're still better :/#i have adhd and i have a hard time self-starting. but a really large amount of creatives in all fields have adhd and they still do so well#every thing that makes it tougher is the same for so many other people and it feels so frustrating that im just having a hard time#overcoming what everyone else seems to have overcome just fine#anyway sry for the rambling#i miss loving games soo much and having so many ideas and wanting to l earn new things
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lieutenantselnia · 7 months ago
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Actually I think it's a bit unfair that I can't be an astrophysicist and a historian and a game developer and a marine biologist and an archaeologist and an author and a seamstress at the same time
#I think I have a quarter-life crisis /hj#like I want to make space discoveries but I also want to analyse ww2 battles and I want to-#study the behaviour of whales and I want to create fictional worlds and I want to sew costumes and and and#there's so much knowledge out there to be learned and things to try out how are you supposed to do this all in one lifetime?#when you're expected to start working a fulltime job and stay in that line for the rest of your life??#though my problem isn't necessarily that I don't wanna be doing that job - it's more that I don't *only* wanna be doing that job#I just wish I could just try different job fields and see what they're like for like 2-3 years before trying out something else#but since they're all so different I'd have to start from the bottom again every time which probably also means worse payment etc#and I just don't have the time for that because I'd also like to build a stable life and maybe have a family later on#plus some of these jobs are just don't pay very well to begin with#I swear if I was rich and didn't have to worry about regular income I'd probably just be a forever student and study a whole bunch of stuff#just because I want to#unless I win the lottery I'll probably just start working fulltime though once I hopefully finish my master's#however I've already been thinking about signing up for studying history afterwards regardless - just for fun without pressure#I love the topic and then I wouldn't have the pressure of *needing* to find a job in the field afterwards#bc it's hard to find something unless you go for the teacher (or maybe professor) route plus pay seems kinda meh either way#but we'll see#I don't even know what this post is supposed to be. like not really a vent but. still complaining? idk#I don't know how to tag this#selnia talks
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razzle-zazzle · 6 months ago
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another fun fact about my dumb little ninjastuck au is that, bc she was raised by kai/the occasional sympathetic ignacian, nya knows very little about troll culture. colton, who had a lusus and some influence from his ancestor, takes it upon himself to teach nya all the things she missed (jay also tries to do this to varying levels of success. they are both idiots <3).
this results in colton crushing pale on nya btw <>
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danielnelsen · 7 months ago
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god how many months years is it gonna take me to learn my way around the veilguard files in frosty gahhh
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