#there's really nothing i would change from it other than having todd live for my self ship purposes

[siddyyyyyyyy]

HI POOKIE

can i request a fic with jason and reader who is supergirl (clark’s daughter) and just then navigating their relationship

i need jason todd in my room at 1 am

Old Friends

Jason Todd x Supergirl!Reader

wc: 2.4 K summary: You meet Jason again after not seeing each other for several years. warnings: fluff? no y/n used a/n: sorry for the long wait, this came out a little longer than usual. I think they would be too shy to admit anything to each other, but they would be cute dou. enjoy!!!

When Jason first met Superman, he didn‘t expect to see another girl his age right beside the man of steel. He was immediately awestruck, realising that you are his daughter, and got straight up flustered when your eyes met briefly.

The younger boy, back then all chirpy and small, really tried his best to impress you in any way possible.

You can pick up a couch without a sweat? He can pick up two… then have his arms hurt for the next few days.

You like frogs? He will fetch and pick up any kinds of frogs he can find and give them to you. Batman definitely scolds him for getting his suit dirty, but Jason couldn‘t care less. You were happy about the things he did, and you both soon grew into a good team on missions. Although those missions didn‘t occur often, you both tried to make the most of it. Playing catch with each other during breaks, drawing together silly things during briefings and exchanging notes, and whispering a small gossip session with the other while no one pays attention to you.

It was all fun and easy with him. Until you couldn‘t go on missions anymore because you had to work on other things, but you promised to get the next one with him as soon as possible. That stretched and stretched for months until it got into years of no missions together.

You are well in your teens now, almost an adult, and you haven‘t heard from Jason at all. It‘s sad and shameful to admit, but you almost forgot the way he looks.

Many years have gone by, being in a new suit and being taller having generally changed over the years. You are an adult now, actually in your twenties, and you are more than excited to see what changed for Jason as well. Since you lived in Metropolis all the time, you didn‘t bother to check what happened with the Bats, assuming everything probably is pretty much the same. Since you are still Supergirl and work together with Superman almost all the time, you are assuming it‘s probably the same with them.

Now that you are flying back to Gotham with your dad, there‘s a lot of thoughts swimming in your head. What if he can‘t even remember you? Is there something Calrk hasn‘t told you yet, and this is actually a bad surprise of his? What if something is incredibly wrong and something bad happened? Is this just another stupid mission?

Coming back to that musty city was nostalgic. With a heavy sigh you‘ve been holding in for, you finally land on the ground.

»You okay? Something bothering you?«

Clark steps beside you and rests his hand on your shoulder, a reassuring weight.

»Why are we here? Like, actually.«

Your dad purses his lips together. You feel the air shift around you, making you even more suspicious.

»We‘re visiting Uncle Batman, remember?«

»Yeah, but why? Did something happen?«

Clark starts walking, and you follow.

»No, nothing really happened. At least nothing that we have to take care of. Just visiting a friend.«

Great, that sounds even more suspicious. After another sigh of yours, you just silently follow him and wait for whatever surprise will get you today.

Even seeing the Wayne Manor feels nostalgic to you. Just looking and approaching the big house is awaking memories in your brain— how you used to chase Jason in the cave and accidentally knock over some vase. Are there still random and useless things in the cave, or did they finally get rid of them?

As usual, you sneaked into the entrance with your dad and managed to get past Alfred without getting caught. Well, at least it seemed like he didn‘t notice you both, but there‘s also a chance he did.

But stepping inside the cave again after so many years felt almost illegal. Sure, it felt welcoming too, but… it feels way more emtpy now. Probably because Batman isn‘t in here yet.

Speaking of the bat, he enters just moments later, seemingly out of nowhere. Superman greets him almost immediately with his usual bright smile, approaching him with a few strides. Just like the earlier days, Batman doesn‘t respond as much and simply gets straight to business.

»Why are you here, Superman? And why is your daughter her as well?«

Wow, it didn‘t even seem like he noticed you in the first place… are you getting impressed by Batman again?

»Oh, just visiting. You know, as good friends do?«

»We are friends?« Batman counters, earning a hearty chuckle from Superman after realising it was indeed just a sarcastic remark. That simple remark feels reassuring, though, almost comforting with how familiar it feels like. It was like a small sign that everything is okay, after all. Just why did Clark need to act so suspicious in the first place?

You didn‘t even notice someone else coming into the cave, being too busy looking around the artefacts that mostly seem to be the same as in the past.

»And you are the daughter of Superman?«

You turn your attention away from the cars in the garage and look at the person that spoke up. Huh… you expected someone else. Instead, there stands Robin.

Robin. In small. Right in front of you. And… he is grumpy?

Is this why you are here? Jason is stuck in his ten-year-old body?

»Oh… yeah, I am.«

Confusion is written all over your face, and you glance back to your dads. Just what is happening here…

»Father told me you used to work together with Jason.«

Silence falls over the two of you. The way this boy talks doesn‘t fit Jason at all. And it‘s clear that this isn‘t Jason.

»Sorry… who are you?«

You finally address the big elephant in the room, still being clueless and confused about the situation.

But so does Robin. He even looks taken aback by the fact that you don‘t know him. Another brief of silence falls over you two before you both call for your dads at the same time.

»Father!«

»Dad!«

Robin‘s glaring at you, and he is glaring at you at the same time. Batman and Superman look over you both, not having noticed any of your exchange before.

It turns out this Robin is actually Damian. He was upset when his father just revealed his identity like that, but it was necessary for you to understand the situation. Shortly after, you also found out about Tim. The Robin after Jason.

So, that leaves for the question: Where is Jason? Is he even still Robin? Why did he retire?

But you don‘t risk asking about that, not wanting to make the situation even more confusing or awkward. Also because you‘ve always been a little scared to ask Batman questions or generally talk to him about more personal stuff.

Eventually, after discussing some more things, it turns out you are here to help them out on a mission. It starts tonight and you are back on track again. Just focusing on the current task and processing the information you get for it.

Arriving at the scene as talked about, you see Batman defeating some of the goons, and that is your call to join him. Superman is also doing the same thing, all the while Damian is getting more information from the bad guys. It‘s all going well as usual, until a bigger threat appears. It knocks you off, making you land some feet away. Turns out, a bigger Villian just arrived and decided to join in on the chaos that‘s already happening.

Due to the fall, it‘s difficult to breathe for a few seconds before you regain yourself and get back on your feet. Charging at the Villian, you put all your anger out on him, beating that random guy in all his weak spots.

You don‘t notice the sound of an engine approaching the scene, too busy handling the bigger guy at the moment.

With a few final punches, he looks like he is about to release his last breath, and that‘s when you decide it‘s enough. Releasing your grip on him, you take a step away and catch your breath.

»Man, I really wanted to handle him. You just stole my job.«

A deeper, distorted voice sounds from behind you, making you turn around quickly. The bigger man just stands there, his red helmet stricking out like nothing else. His shining slits stare right at you, almost making you step back away from him.

Even when he looks rather intimidating, he won‘t make a move on you. And no one even fights him.

»Well, your fault for arriving late.«

You retort back with a small shrug, trying to handle the surprise with some sarcasm. It works, at least you think so. He doesn‘t say anything, only making a quieter huff sound that could be mistaken for a chuckle.

»My bike is pretty fast; I don‘t know what you are talking about.«

He shrugs as well and approaches you now. For your luck, Superman also arrives by your side at the same time, feeling rather tense for some reason.

Batman eventually appears beside the strange man too, with Damian standing behind a few steps. It‘s quiet for a few seconds before Batman updates everyone on the status of the goons and operation, glad to hear it all went successful. Superman is reluctant to leave your side but is forced to eventually, having to discuss some more things with Batman in private.

For whatever reason, that Red Helmet is still standing on the same spot and stares at you.

»And, how should I call you?« Finally, you speak up and want to hear some answers, still having no clue why he is here.

»Red Hood.«

You nod in response, letting that sink in. His short answer didn‘t leave you satisfied though, but you are also slightly unsure of what you should even ask in the first place.

»So, Supergirl, huh? What made you come to Gotham again?«

The distorted voice won‘t give away any emotions, but you swear there is a hint of bitterness.

Finally, before you could answer him, the two older men arrive back to the both of you and seem less tense than before. You feel less awkward now that your dad is by your side again, being still curious about Red Hood, though.

A few more things are briefly discussed before Batman turns to Red Hood, speaking up more casually.

»Are you joining on family dinner this Sunday? Alfred‘s making his chocolate lava cakes.«

Once this question drops, your eyes almost pop out of your skull. Family dinner? Who is this guy? Are they just inviting random people to their manor these days?

Red Hood seems tense, staying quiet for a moment before he eventually answers.

»Just because Alfres makes lava cakes.«

He grumbles back more quietly, making Batman almost smirk.

You turn your attention to Clark beside you, silently begging for answers. He notices your helpless look and becomes sheepish.

»Oh! Uh… Jason is Red Hood. Forgot to tell you.« He whispers to you with a small smile, waiting for you to react. You pause, however, before you finally become more flabbergasted. It doesn‘t make sense at all.

Dinner at the manor was more chaotic than it used to be. With the added family members, it just seemed like a big family that secretly hates each other. The constant talking and insults between the boys are not lost on the both of you. In contrast to them, you just sit quietly together with your dad, watching the chaos erupt between the seven other bats. Besides Barabara and Cassandra, the rest seems to be pretty lively.

One thing you can‘t ignore is the way Jason‘s eyes seem to burn into you the whole time. He can‘t stop staring and looking at you with those intense eyes of his. You tried not to glance his way too much, but you did anyway. You noticed the green hint in his blue eyes. Something you never noticed before. Something else you noticed too is the way he became way more quiet. It‘s not the way it used to be. You really miss the small gossip sessions and exchanges of notes with him.

The dinner is served by Alfred, and you thank him like the rest, starting to eat peacefully. As if on command, the table also becomes way more quiet once everyone has their food and starts eating. You thought you would feel relieved about the silence, but now it almost seems awkward and strange that it‘s quiet.

»Stop breathing so loud, Drake.«

»I‘m not even sitting beside you!«

»Then why can I hear your breathing from up here?«

Damian seems to enjoy making Tim upset. That‘s one of the things you took note of. Also the visible tension between Tim and Jason. At least they don‘t insult each other, only catching glares aimed at Tim from your old friend.

Dick seems to be happy to be here. Especially since you and Superman are there too. You know that the first Robin and your father worked some times as well, having talked and played with him when you didn‘t have your powers yet. He felt like a big brother for you, having played Barbie with him and also getting to have piggyback rides.

He eventually talks with your dad for most of the time, sharing a few smiles with you over the table. Bruce eventually joins in the dinner, not even trying to control the chaos but does give out warnings whenever one of them insults the other verbally.

Finally, after getting the overly delicious dessert, you can have some time to talk before you leave the manor.

As you stand in the hallway with your dad, who is currently still talking to Bruce, you decide to find Jason and talk. You find him beefing with Tim, but they quickly stop as soon as you step into view.

Tim walks away with a knowing smirk, telling him silently that he won this argument. Whatever it was, Jason is glaring daggers at him before he finally turns to you.

You both speak up at the same time, growing sheepish, and he gestures for you to speak first. You suggest exchanging numbers, which works better than you thought. After that‘s done, you finally get to ask your questions.

He doesn‘t really answer the more personal questions as casually as the others, but he tries. Turns out, Jason is still the sweet boy from the past. Whatever he had to go through really affected him, and you don‘t pry on it, figuring it will come with time.

Saying goodbye again is way more painful. You don‘t know when you will meet again, so you make a pinky promise to meet again on a Sunday.

←MASTERLIST

[jsfix]

Helping Hands

Kinktober Week Two - Period Sex

Pairing: Jason Todd x AFAB!Reader

Summary: You’re on your period. Jason wants to help you feel better.

Warnings: MDNI, AFAB!reader but no pronouns or descriptions except that Jason picks them up but like he’s strong it’s fine, r is on their period, period blood mention obvs, cramps, run on sentences probably, painful periods, diet mention but like in reference to things that could help relieve symptoms of a period, this is more of a lead up to smut, writer gave up towards the end

AN: where’s mine. hope my fellow floridians are staying safe 🙏🏻🙏🏻 this storm is scary

“Honey, I’m home.” You hear his modulated voice call out as he enters through the window, the light from the tv reflecting off his masked face.

You’d woken up at 2 am to cramps, almost a week earlier than you were expecting. You decided watching old cartoons on the couch was better than staying alone in bed, unable to sleep while waiting for your boyfriend to come home from patrol. You figured maybe it would be a distraction. You figured wrong.

Jason unlatches his helmet as he walks toward you and sets it on the side table as he bends down to press a soft kiss against your lips.

“Hi,” you said softly, eyes quickly scanning over him. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” he smiles at you, gently cupping your face, “You okay?”

“Cramps.” He pouts sympathetically.

“Need anything?”

“Just cuddles,” you say, giving him puppy eyes as if he would ever say no to you. He kisses your forehead as he stands up, telling you he has to change first. You’re reluctant to let him go, not caring too much about whatever filth his suit could rub off on you. You let him go anyway; you could wait a bit longer while he gets comfortable. He comes back in less than a minute.

“How was it?” You ask as he settles in behind you, head laid on the armrest between yours and the couch. You turn around to face him.

You and Jason lay there for a bit, arms around each other while you talk about your days. Though you do feel more settled now that he’s back home and you can hold him, your cramps are just as bad as they were when they woke you up. You grimace as another one hits you. Jason pauses half-way through his explanation of the new series he had started reading to once again ask if you needed anything.

“What more could I do?” You frustratedly start listing all the things you’ve done to try to relieve your pain, “nothing has worked! I’ve tried everything.”

“Well… not everything.” He says hesitantly.

You knew what he was referring to. In the beginning of your relationship, there was one month where your symptoms were especially bad and nothing gave you relief. He took it upon himself to research things that could help. His research told him changing things like diet and exercise could potentially relive the more intense symptoms of a period. That, and sex.

You had immediately said no when he brought it up. It was still too new in your relationship so some embarrassment was felt at the idea of him seeing and getting covered in your blood, even if it would help. When you told him, he’d scoffed at you and raised his eyebrows in a ‘seriously?’ gesture. Anyway.

Now, you had been together for a long time, you lived together, he was the only person you wanted to be with for the rest of your life. And you really wanted the pain to go away. So, you said fuck it.

“Are you sure?” You asked. You could have sworn his eyes lit up. The fierce kiss he gave you was answer enough.

You giggled into the kiss as he picked you up to carry you to the bedroom.

“‘M gonna go get a towel.” He sat you at the foot of the bed, kissing you one more time before leaving the room. You began to undress as you waited for him.

“Hey! That’s my job.” He joked as he placed the towel down.

“Then come do it!” You quipped back, laughing when he pushed you back onto the bed, crawling up it to hover over you on his strong arms. He bit your neck in response and you shrieked.

“Gonna ignore the sass.” He kissed over the skin he bit, pressing his tongue over it lightly to soothe. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

“Yes,” you said, wrapping your legs around his waist to pull him against you, “I’m sure.”

[igotanidea]

No strings attached (1) : Jason Todd x plus-size!reader

Summary: Madison was Jason's stalker and he was tired. When Y/N moved into the neighbourhood he saw that as an opportunity to get rid of the baggage. Accidental meeting led to something more than friend, never a relationship though. He was not into tail, surely not, right? So why sudden change of behaviour when she pushed him away? And why would she push him away in the first place?!

Warnings: not in this chapter, but definitely smut and angst in the next ones. I'll post individual warnings in each chapter

***

„Why the fuck can’t you just leave me alone?” Jason sighed deeply leaning onto the doorframe of the apartment next to his. Honestly he had no idea what was happening to him lately. Maybe it was the effect of getting back to Gotham, but he became more depressed than before. Guess being back from the death and realizing your family replaced you does such things to people. Of course, there was his hole Red Hood persona, but Jason? Jason Todd was insecure, sensitive and in desperate need of someone to love. And someone who would love him back. However, all those traits were skillfully covered by sarcasm, edgelord attitude and harsh behavior. So why wasn’t he able to just tell this girl to fuck off and leave him alone? Why couldn’t he say something mean, which will left her offended and disappear from his life.

He just couldn’t and it was really getting on his nerves.

“But Jason….” the girl whined “why can’t you see it?”

“See what exactly?” he raised an eyebrow

“We are just perfect for each other!” she squealed and almost jumped into his arms in an attempt to hug him “Come on, just give this a chance!”

“Please, go away, Madison.”

“You remembered my name!”

“Of course I remembered your name. How could I not?” he rubbed his forehead “you left like a hundred notes with your name and number in my mailbox. And sticky notes on my bike. And you tormented my ….’ He hesitated, the word brother, not getting thought his mouth “nevermind. I told you, I am not interested.”

“You just don’t know what you’re missing, Jaybird….”

“Stop calling me that! I hate it! Who …. Who the fuck taught you this nickname!?” now she actually managed to anger him. Maybe it was good, maybe for the first time in a while he would be able to take some direct action and get rid of that stalker of a girl.  

“I got my ways.” She smiled mischievously “nothing ever gets lost in the Internet and I got just the right tools to dig deep.”

“Listen up, Madison….”

“Oh, I am listening. Extremely carefully.” She took a step towards him and he immediately flinched. Cornered by a girl, fucking great. Grayson would never let him live this down. “Come on, Jason, let me in….” she cooed, her hand tracing up his arms towards his shoulder “you remember how much fun we had last time….”

“It was one time! One fucking time and it was a mistake!”

“The kind you want to keep repeating?”

“What the fu…..” he started, but another female voice joined the conversation successfully cutting him off. A very annoyed female voice.

“I’m sorry, but could you two take this conversation, elsewhere? You are kind of blocking the door to my apartment and I would love to take this off.” She pointed towards the heavy backpack she was wearing.

Oh, right. There have been a lot of talk in the building about a possible new tenant. Guess she was the one. And the timing was just perfect for Jason, who immediately jumped into the occasion.

“Baby!” he almost screamed and both girls looked at him with wide eyes. Madison in surprise, bordering shock, the other one with “what-the-fuck” expression, probably wondering if he was mental. So much of a good first impression “you are finally here!” he continued, hugging the girl lightly to not startle her.

“What the …..?” she hissed into his ear, but before she could finish the sentence he squeezed her tighter, almost getting a kick in the groin.

“Come on, just play along with me for a minute.” Jason whispered, so that only she could here “I need to get rid of her, I’ll buy you a wine or whatever, just help the neighbor out.”

“You’ll owe me much more than just a wine if you keep your hands where they are now.”

Oh, shit. Only now, he realized that his right palm was definitely way to low on her back. But damn, the girl got curves in all the right places and he was just a man.

“Sorry.” He mumbled and pulled away, acting like they knew each other for eternity “Why didn’t you call me, princess? I told you to do it the second you get in town! I can’t believe you carried all this weight by yourself!”

“I just wanted to surprise you…, em…, honey.”

“You most definitely did.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Hold right there.” Madison came in between them and pushed the other girl away slightly “who the fuck are you?”

“She’s my girlfriend.” Jason blurted, hoping his new neighbor would really play along.

“GIRLFRIEND!?”

“Yeah, um, hi, I’m Y/N. Nice to…..”

“Did you know you’re boyfriend is cheating on you, sunshine? No wonder, though.” She gave Y/N a look over  “You should really lose some weight, sunshine. Will do you good. ”

“I’m sorry, what….?”

“Hey! You have no right to talk to her like that!”

“Sure not. but for some reason you choose me over her multiple times….”

“ONCE!”

“Whatever, Jaybrid. If you ever get bored with her, again, you know where to find me. I’m not giving up on you, baby” Madison raised onto her tiptoes and kissed his cheek briefly. Jason almost didn’t stop himself from wiping it off his face. “as for you, girlfriend” she almost hissed the last word “I don’t; think this is going to last long. Too bad for you.” her vicious laugh filled the whole staircase “love you Jaybird, call me!”

And leaving just a thread of perfume she was  gone. Not that she left furious Jason and absolutely confused Y/N behind.

“I’m sorry about ….” Jason turned around, ready to do some explanation, but much to his disappointment, the only sound he heard was clicking on the key in a keyhole. From inside.  “Hey, come on, Y/n! Open up!”

“Go away, you freak!”

“Let me at least apologize face to face, not through the door!” a moment of silence on her part gave him unreasonable hope.

“Apology accepted, now move out of my door or I’ll come at you!” if only she knew who she was threatening….

“I promised you a wine for helping me, remember?”

“I don’t care! If you don’t leave in ten seconds I’m gonna call the police!”

“Hate to break it to you, princess, but it’s Gotham. I’m the best chances at protection you have. Or you can always call upon Batman, but I don’t see that being successful.” Jason scoffed, starting to walk back and forth.

“Oh, yeah, right. That really sounds exciting. Meeting the big, bad bat in person.” Her voice reverberated somehow clearer and closer than before and when he raised his gaze realized she actually opened the door and was now standing right in front of him.

Shit, she was pretty with her h/c hair, flowing around her face, a bit fuzzy because of shitty Gotham weather, shiny e/c eyes and pouty lips. She might have been a bit on the heavier side, but it only added to her charm and fire that she showed before by putting on the little display.

She was beautiful and even tiredness of the journey couldn’t hide that.

“Hi.” Jason whispered, a little taken aback and filled with guilt of dragging her into his mess.

“What the fuck was that?” she sighed deeply “Look, Jason, I am exhausted. I had a long journey and as much as I would love to take you up on that wine offer I had no power in me to do that. So how about we just forget about this whole mess and say farewell to each other, hm? I have no interest in interfering in your personal life, especially with the girl who called me fat the second she laid eyes on me.”

“Don’t you want to know your handsome neighbor better?” he smirked and realized that even though it just slipped through, there was a chance that his old self was getting back to life. Was it because of her?

“Nah, not really. I think I’ve seen enough. And like I said, being back in Gotham sucks, but what can a girl do, right? Life sucks as well sometimes.” She shrugged and started closing the door

“Wait!” he put a feet in, before she managed to actually do it.

“What now?”

“Are you from around here?”

“Born Gothamite. Glad you can’t tell it just by looking at me. Now, I really want to go to sleep, if you don’t mind…..” she yawned and rubbed her eyes in the cutest child-like manner, making him feel to many things. Too many dangerous things.....

‘Right, sorry. I’ll leave you to it. Good night, Y/N.”

“Yeah, night, crazy boy.”

She already had a nickname for him.

He definitely wasn’t going to let this acquaintance end up at this….

next part ->->->

[slut4thebroken]

Chapter two: Helping Hand

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Pairing | Arkham Knight/Jason Todd × Bruce's daughter!reader

Summary | You can’t stop thinking about what might’ve happened to him, so he helps you take your mind off it.

Warnings | 18+, sexual content, angst, smut, unprotected sex, breeding, oral (fem receiving), kissing, thoughts about torture and sexual abuse, vomit, crying fluff, Jay is a sweetheart and I love him

Words | 4.9 k

Notes | Three things: 1. I don’t have much practice writing emotional smut so I’m sorry if it’s not very good😣 2. I’m pretty sure the Robin suit was bulletproof and that’s why he didn’t die… but we’re just gonna ignore that when his scars are mentioned lol 3. I could not for the life of me find a gif of AK!Jason’s face that was wide and not super tall so enjoy this one instead lmao

Ao3 link | <3

Fic Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Chapter one

You stood, frozen, a few feet from the door. After a moment, you snapped out of it, now very determined to escape. 

You maneuvered your legs through your arms until they were in front of you. Unsurprisingly, the knots are good. Jason’s always been good at them, in and out of the bedroom. You pulled on it with your teeth, trying to loosen it. When it didn’t work, you stopped, thinking of another way. 

You’ve seen your father do this only once, but he’s done it a few times before so how hard could it be?… You tried to remember how he positioned his hands, then took a deep breath. After a few seconds of trying to make yourself do it, you scoffed- questioning why you would even try it in the first place. 

“Nope- no. I can’t break my fucking thumb.” Instead, you found a knife in the kitchen and slowly started working it through the rope. It took way too long until it finally grew loose and fell to the floor, but once it did, you searched for a way out or a way to contact your father. After being unsuccessful, you sighed and sat on the couch. 

The door being slammed shut made you bolt up- you must’ve fallen asleep. Jason walked straight into his room, not even looking at you. 

“You have to let me contact him.” You said after he walked back out, now without his helmet. 

“No.” 

“You can’t just keep me here forever.” You snapped, crossing your arms over your chest. 

“Don't tempt me, princess.”

“Jason, I’m serious.” He sighed and finally looked at you. 

“I don’t plan to. But until this is done, you’re staying here.” 

“What is this?” When he didn’t respond, you huffed. Then, “Does he know it’s you?” That made him freeze again. 

“He should, since he’s the world’s greatest detective, but we’ve long since learned he doesn’t live up to that title.” Good. If he knows it’s Jason then he probably won’t be as worried about you. 

“I need to let him know I’m okay so he can-“ You were about to say, so he can focus on stopping you and not on finding me. 

“So he can, what?” His voice made you stiffen- you've never heard him sound so menacing before. 

“N-nothing.” You said quietly, averting your gaze. You already knew he was giving you the “you better tell me right fucking now” look so you quickly changed the subject. “Are you going to kill him?” You asked quietly, scared of his answer. 

“Not yet. He needs to suffer more first, then I’ll kill him.” You stared at him in shock and this time he was the one to avert his gaze. 

“Jason, please. This is my dad we’re talking about. I don’t have anyone else.” 

“You have me.” He said quietly, making you frown. 

“You know that’s not what I mean.” He was silent for a moment, then cleared his throat and looked at you again. 

“He deserves to die. You moved on from me so easily, I’m sure you can do the same for him.” 

“What the hell are you talking about?” 

“I saw you.” 

“What?” 

“With Dick. I saw you.” He gritted, making you stiffen. 

“Whatever you think you saw, Jason, it wasn’t like that.” Your stomach twisted knowing that someone else other than Dick knew about that night. 

“Really? Because it seemed pretty clear that he was fucking you.” He said bitterly. You swallowed thickly and looked at your lap, remembering what had happened that night. 

It’s been a little over a year since you lost him. Dick was staying the night at the manor before heading back to Blüdhaven in the morning, that’s the only reason you even had this opportunity. He opened the door, hair messy, sweatpants low on his hips, and immediately invited you in when he saw your current state. 

“I- I can’t… Dick, I can’t anymore, it- it hurts so much. I don’t want it to hurt anymore, please.” You whimpered. His hand cupped your cheek, wiping your tears. 

“What do you want me to do?” He asked softly, gaze trailing over your face. 

“Make me forget. Please, I just need to not think about it for a little bit.” You whispered, tentatively placing your hands on his chest. 

“Are you sure?” Instead of answering, you placed a hand on the back of his neck and pulled him into a kiss. He was frozen for a beat before reciprocating. Never breaking the kiss, he walked you toward his bed and gently laid you down, then crawled over you. The rest of the night was filled with soft moans, whimpers of his name, and you forcing your thoughts back to him every time they wandered. 

Afterwards, he laid next to you, both of you panting and staring at the ceiling. Without his touch, all of the thoughts came back full force and you recoiled away from him as you jolted up. You couldn’t even formulate a sentence but he seemed to understand when you gathered your pajamas and hurried back to your room. 

You felt sick to your stomach. You used your best friend to forget about your dead boyfriend- his brother. The rest of the night was filled with quiet sobs and silent apologies to Jason. 

“I know you won’t believe me, but it really wasn’t like that, Jay.” 

“I mean, I always figured you’d eventually move on to Dick. I didn’t think I’d have to die for that to happen though.” He scoffed bitterly. 

“That’s not what happened.” You said quietly, feeling nausea start to build in your stomach at the thought of you being the cause of some of his pain. “I’m sorry.” You whispered, eyes burning with unshed tears. 

“What, now you’re gonna cry? You’re a big girl, you made the decision to use my own brother as a fucking rebound, so deal with it.” He spat and you let out a quiet sob as you turned to face the other side of the room. He was right… After doing what you thought was going to make you feel better, you only felt worse. Now instead of thoughts of his death and the torture he might’ve endured, it was also about how you betrayed him. You could have picked anyone else on the planet, but you chose Dick. The person Jason felt has always gotten everything and more. The only person he was ever worried you would leave him for. 

“How long did you wait, huh?” His voice was much closer now and then you felt a hand in your hair, painfully pulling you to face him. 

“Or did this start before I was kidnapped?” He sneered. 

“No! No, it- it only happened once.” You sobbed, wishing you could turn your head away from him. “I thought… I thought he could help me.” 

“Help you?” He scoffed. 

“Yes! Because the love of my life was fucking murdered and for over a year, every single time I fell asleep or let my thoughts wander, my stupid fucking brain would make up things that might’ve happened to you since my dad didn’t let me see the video. So I was hoping that for just one fucking night, I wouldn’t have to think about that.” You yelled, tears streaming down your cheeks. His grip on your hair grew slack until his hand fell to his side. 

“And did he?” He asked quietly. 

“No.” A heavy silence filled the room and you looked down at your lap again. “I’m sorry, Jason.” You whispered. He sighed and started walking away. “You’re still mad at me?” The venom in your voice poorly masked your sadness. 

“No I’m not fucking mad at you! How can I be after that shit?” He exclaimed, running a hand through his hair and closing his eyes. 

“It’s okay if you are.” You said softly, despite the fact that your chest ached at the thought. “Just don’t be mad at Dick, it wasn’t his fault.” He let out another heavy sigh and walked back over, sitting on the right side of the couch, as far away from you as possible. You stared at the scar on his face, feeling bile rise in your throat as you imagined him screaming and crying. Or maybe by then he had been so tired- so broken, that he couldn’t even scream. Clenching your jaw as your eyes started to burn again, you wished that Joker was still alive so you could kill him yourself.  

“Hey,”

“Huh?” You asked, moving your gaze to his eyes. Clearing your throat and willing the tears to disappear, you forced yourself to pay attention- to not let your thoughts wander again. 

“I asked if you’re okay.” 

“Oh. Yeah- sorry.” You lied, gaze straying back to the scar. How many other scars does he have now? Your eyes moved down to his body, imagining all of the places he could be permanently marred. 

“I’d make a joke about you undressing me with your eyes but you actually look like you’re about to start crying.” He chuckled dryly, making you look up at him again. 

“Sorry. I’m sorry.” Swallowing the lump in your throat, you forced yourself to look at the ground. 

A lot could’ve happened in over a year. So some of your made up scenarios are probably true. Was it only Joker or were there others? Did they only torture him physically and emotionally? Or did they torture him... sexually too? 

You could barely even finish the thought before bile was quickly rising up your throat, making you run to the bathroom. This wasn’t the first time you’ve gotten so nauseous thinking about what happened to him that you actually threw up. You slammed the door shut, not wanting him to see you like this, and once you finished throwing up you just sat on the floor and cried. You felt so fucking weak. And he probably needed you to be the strong one right now so you can help him with what he’s going through. 

A hand on your knee made you jump. Jason was sitting next to you, offering you a glass of water that you gratefully took to swish in your mouth and spit back out into the toilet before closing the lid and flushing it. 

“I’m sorry.” You croaked, not able to look at him. 

“If I knew it was going to be this hard on you I would’ve stayed away. I’m sorry, sweetheart.” He pulled you into him, letting you rest your head on his chest as you tried to calm down. 

“What happened to you?” You whispered and he stiffened. 

“Baby, I don’t really think it’s the best idea for me to tell you. Just try not to think about it, okay?” 

“I can’t.” You whimpered. 

“How about I help you?” 

“How?” He didn’t respond. Instead, he helped you stand, got out an extra toothbrush and put toothpaste on it, then handed it to you. You took it and tiredly brushed your teeth, watching through the mirror as he wrapped his arms around your waist and placed his chin on your head as he waited. You leaned back into his body and let your eyes fall closed, focusing on his chest moving with each breath and his thumb rubbing soothing circles on your side. 

When you finished, he picked you up bridal style, making you release a startled giggle, and carried you into his bedroom. He gently set you on the bed, then started removing his tactile gear. You eyed him curiously until he was in just an undershirt and underwear. When he laid down next to you on his side, you mirrored the position. 

“However you want me to help, I will. Whatever you want. We can just lay here and talk to get your mind off it or I can help you another way.” He said softly, bringing a hand up to brush your hair behind your ear, then cup your cheek. 

“I need you, Jay.” You whispered, eyes fluttering down to his lips. 

“Are you sure?” He rasped. 

“Please.” That was all it took for him to slowly move forward and press his lips to yours. The kiss was tentative, experimental, but quickly deepened. His hand moved to the back of your neck to hold you against him as you moved yours to fist his shirt, pulling him closer. Without breaking the kiss, he pulled you on top of him, his freehand rubbing up and down your back in soothing motions. 

“I missed you so much, baby.” He whispered against your lips, making you whine. When his hands moved to the hem of your shirt, you pulled back and ripped it over your head, then continued the kiss. Warm hands snaked up your back until he met your bra, effortlessly unclasping it and sliding it off your arms to the growing pile on the floor. You moved your hand to his cheek, gasping when you felt the raised skin. 

“I- I’m sorry. I forgot and it startled me.” You said nervously, worried you had upset him. 

“Don’t be sorry, princess.” You could tell he was being genuine. Leaning down slowly, you pressed a tentative kiss to the marred skin, watching his cheeks turn pink. 

“C’mere.” He mumbled, pulling you into another kiss. “I love you.” 

“I love you too. So much, Jay.” His smile was infectious and soon enough you were both sporting lovesick grins. He swiftly rolled both of you over, never breaking the kiss, and settled between your legs. Your hands made their way to his hair as he started trailing kisses down your neck, sometimes stopping to leave a mark. He quickly reached your chest and took your nipple into his mouth, groaning against you as his fingers stimulated the other one. When he was satisfied, he moved to the next one, giving it the same treatment. 

You did your best to just focus on the feel of him and not let your thoughts wander. But even though he was right here in your arms, you still had trouble believing this was real. 

“Am- am I…” He pulled up to look at you and you brought your hands down to his cheeks. “I’m so scared this is just another dream.” You whispered, gaze rapidly moving over his face, trying to re-memorize it just in case.  

“I’m real, baby. It’s really me.” He said softly, bringing a hand up to cup your cheek. Slowly leaning down, you felt his breath fan your lips for only a second before he was kissing you. Your grip tightened on his face, scared that if you let go, he’d disappear. After a moment, you pulled back, gasping and panting, keeping him close to you. Opening your eyes to find him already looking at you, you nodded, giving him permission to keep going. 

Jason continued his path down your chest and stomach until he reached your pants. He slowly dragged them down your legs, teasing you, and you tugged on his hair, expressing your impatience. He just chuckled and finished pulling them off, then placed his hands on your hips, tracing the fabric of your underwear with his thumbs. 

“I’ve always loved these. My second favorite pair.” He said quietly, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. Your hips bucked subconsciously and he looked at you with a teasing glint in his eyes. 

“Have you forgotten your manners?” He said with a smirk, making you blush. 

“…Please.” You muttered, embarrassed. When he didn’t move, you let out a needy whine. “Jay, please.” You pouted, giving him puppy dog eyes. 

“How can I say no to that face?” He cooed, pulling your underwear off, then parting your legs and settling between them. When he licked his lips and let out a low groan, even your ears grew warm with a blush. 

“So fuckin pretty.” He said under his breath, moving onto his stomach. “Perfect.” He placed a soft kiss to the inside of your thigh and you lightly tugged on his hair again. 

“Jay, stop teasing.” You frowned. 

“I’ve waited years for this. I’m taking my fucking time.” He growled. Despite his words, he slid his arms under your legs to pull you into him and immediately dove in, licking a slow stripe up your folds. 

“O- oh… Jay,” You said breathlessly, hips flinching when he let out a loud moan. Like a man starved, once he got a taste, he grew even more eager. He lapped up your arousal as he fucked his tongue inside of you, but when he moved up and sucked your clit into his mouth, you let out a strangled moan, pulling him against you by his hair. 

“Fuck! Oh my god… Jason,” You whimpered, unable to control the way your hips were rutting against his face. It felt as good as you remembered, maybe even better, and when a finger easily slid inside your drooling hole, all of your thoughts just completely vanished. 

“How’s that feel, princess?” He grumbled against your clit, making your hips buck toward the low vibrations. 

“Good- so fucking good, Jay.” You whined breathlessly. “Please don’t stop.” He inserted another finger, making your grip tighten in his hair as you threw your head back with a loud moan. The coil in your belly was so fucking tight and you prayed that because this was the first time in a while, he wouldn’t want to draw it out. 

“Close-“ You gasped out, tilting your head back up to look at him. His eyes were closed and brows furrowed as he repeatedly sucked your clit into his mouth, never stopping the motions of his fingers. 

“Come for me, baby. Please.” He all but moaned as his eyes flickered up to you. You held him tight against you as your hips maintained a steady rocking against his face. “C’mon I know you can. Let me taste you- I need it, sweetheart. Please.” How could you say no to that? He only had to suck your clit into his mouth once more before you were falling over the edge, feeling your entire body tremble beneath him. You sobbed out a moan, feeling so overwhelmed with emotions and feelings and him. But you never wanted to stop. You wanted to live in this moment with him forever, just feeling close to him and nothing else. 

As you came down from your orgasm and grew sensitive, you knew he wouldn’t stop, so you pulled on his hair, trying to remove his mouth from your overstimulated clit. 

“Jay- Jay, baby, please.” You gasped out, hips twitching in a useless attempt to escape the overstimulation. He reluctantly pulled back and you watched with half lidded eyes as he removed his fingers and sucked them into his mouth, cleaning them. You whimpered at the erotic sight. 

“I hope you know that now that I have a taste for it again, I’m gonna have my mouth on that cunt at least once a day.” He smirked, making your cheeks flush. 

“You’re so crude.” 

“No,” He scoffed, “you’re just easily flustered. Now. Speaking of getting a taste for things again, if I don’t get my cock in you right now, I’m gonna explode.” He said as he moved up your body until he was leaning over you. You smiled, trailing your hands down his back and grabbing the bottom of his shirt to pull it over his head, but it quickly faded as you got a glimpse of his torso. Your eyes started burning as you examined all of the scars, ranging from knife wounds to a bullet hole. 

Two fingers grabbed your chin and tilted your head up as he lowered his body until his chest was pressed to yours so you couldn’t see. But the damage was already done. 

“Hey,” He said softly, moving his hand to cup your cheek. “Just focus on me and the moment. That’s all that matters, okay? Just us, nothing else.”

“I know… I’m sorry. I feel so stupid getting this upset about it when I’m not even the one who experienced it.” You let out a dry laugh, looking to the side. You really did feel stupid because of this and you hated it. It’s not like you. 

“That’s not stupid. If someone did even a quarter of the stuff to you that he did to me, I would kill them in a heartbeat- Actually not a heartbeat. I’d cut off all their limbs and then just let them bleed out to really make them suffer.” You looked at him again and couldn’t help the way the corners of your lips turned up. “The point is, I would feel the same way. I’d probably also cry if I thought about it too much. So no, it’s not stupid.” 

“I just- I feel so weak. And you probably need me to be strong right now after what you went through.” 

“I’ve made my peace with it… Mostly. And I didn’t come back because I needed you to be strong for me, I came back because without you, I don’t have anything. Being away from you was probably the worst part- and I know it was selfish of me to force myself back into your life and open old wounds but when have you ever known me to be selfless?” He chuckled lightly and you scoffed at his words. 

“You’re the most selfless person I’ve ever met.” 

“That’s debatable. Point is, I just need you. Nothing else.” You gave him a small smile and snaked your hand around the back of his neck to pull him into a kiss. When you almost immediately pulled away, he tried to chase your lips, making you chuckle breathlessly. 

“I love you, Jason Todd. More than anything.” The smile he gave you made your stomach flutter and your chest ache- you missed that smile so damn much. “Enough cheesy stuff. If you don’t put your cock in me right now I’m going to explode.” He barked out a laugh which just made your stomach flutter and chest ache even more. 

“Yes, ma’am.” He said sarcastically, quickly throwing off his underwear and climbing back over you. The blunt head of his cock brushed your opening and you took in a sharp breath, waiting eagerly. He dragged the tip through your folds, coating it in your arousal and his spit, and you let out a low whine as you squirmed. 

“Please?” You pouted, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and your legs around his hips. He didn’t respond. Instead, he applied more pressure until the head of his cock breached your hole, making your breath hitch. His brows furrowed as his mouth opened in a silent moan and he let his head hang down. 

“Jesus- fuck. Squeezing me so fuckin tight, baby, I’m not gonna last.” He said through a moan. To be fair, you didn't expect him to. You don’t know what he’s been doing since he escaped, but you figured it wasn’t having sex. 

“I don’t care. Please just fuck me, Jay, I need it.” You whined, making him let out what sounded like a whimper. 

“Keep talking like that and I’m gonna bust right fuckin now.” He gritted, opening his eyes to look at you. You did your best to hide your smirk as you purposefully clenched around his length, making his hips stutter forward, pushing in a little more.  When he saw your poorly concealed smirk, he narrowed his eyes. “You’re a fuckin tease, you know that?” 

“Yeah well I like seeing you blush like that.” You looked up at him through your lashes with a teasing glint in your eyes and he placed a hand on your neck. 

“You wanna keep teasing me and see what happens? Or do you want me to fuck you.” He asked, squeezing the sides of your neck lightly. When you huffed and looked away from him, you could practically feel his smirk. “That’s what I thought.” 

He moved his hips again, not stopping until he was completely buried inside you. You let out a ragged breath as you struggled to adjust to his size- honestly it felt like he was all the way up your stomach and you knew that he was. You knew that if you looked down, you’d be able to see where his cock was bulging your stomach. And you really fucking missed that feeling. 

“Now you’re speechless, huh?” He smirked. You glared at him, but it quickly softened as your face twisted in pleasure when he slowly started moving out. He dragged his cock back until only the tip was inside, then slowly forced it back in. You whined as he kept up the slow pace, but deep down you were a little grateful that he knew and respected the fact that you’d need some time to adjust, especially after all this time without it. 

He removed his hand, then suddenly dropped his head into your shoulder, kissing and biting the skin before moving up to your neck to suck the skin in his mouth, leaving even more marks. You couldn’t hold down the embarrassing sounds crawling up your throat, but they only spurred him on. His pace increased slightly and the first unexpected thrust knocked the breath out of you. 

“Missed you so fucking much.” He muttered against your skin. “Thought about you every day- about coming home to you… You kept me alive.” He whispered the last part hesitantly and you let out a choked sob from his words. You wished you could say the same, but you were under different circumstances. You lost the love of your life and if you’re being completely honest, there were parts of it where you truly wanted to die just to have a break from your emotions. 

“I love you.” Was all you could think of to say. He pulled back to look at you, thrusts never slowing. 

“I love you, sweetheart. More than you’ll ever know.” You pulled him down into another kiss, eagerly chasing his lips as the pace of his thrusts increased even more. He reached a hand down to your clit, making you release a muffled moan into his mouth before pulling back. 

“God- I’m not gonna last long either.” You said through a breath, feeling the knot in your stomach grow tighter. 

“I need you to come with me. Can you do that, princess?” He rasped, cupping your cheek again and moving his gaze back and forth between your eyes. You nodded with a whimper and he gave you a proud smile. “Good girl. Just gotta hold it a little longer, okay?” You let out a loud moan from his praise as your walls fluttered around his cock, making him hiss. But despite that, you did your best to hold it, wanting to come with him. 

It didn’t take him long before his thrusts were becoming erratic and frenzied, rutting into you as he desperately chased his orgasm. 

“Don’t pull out.” You whispered. You figured he wouldn’t since he said “come together,” but you wanted to be sure. 

“Fuck,” He choked out, hips snapping into you as he neared his orgasm. “I won’t, princess. Gonna fill you up nice and good- give you what you want. But you need to ask for it nicely.” His words were strained as he tried to stave off his incoming release. You wanted to whine and hide your face instead of saying it, but you were rapidly approaching the edge and you didn’t want to draw it out any longer. 

“Jay, please. Need you to fill me up- I need it so bad.” Your whine turned into a sob as you clenched down on him again. 

“Good girl. Good fucking girl. You ready?” You nodded eagerly, trying to hold it until he actually gave you the word. Only a few thrusts later, he choked out, “Come with me, baby. Come now.” That was all you needed to let the knot of arousal in your stomach snap. His lips pressed to yours, muffling your cries and moans as his hips stuttered to a stop, now only bucking forward sporadically, trying to bury his length impossibly deeper inside of you. Using your legs and arms, you pulled his body completely against yours as you savored the feeling of his cock twitching inside you, filling you up. 

When he pulled away, you both were panting, trying to catch your breath. He rolled you over again, never removing his cock, and had you lay on top of him completely, letting you rest your head on his chest. 

“I love you.” He murmured, planting a kiss on the top of your head. 

“I love you.” You responded, in the same tone, then placed a kiss on his chest. You could see some of his scars with the way you were laying, so you let your eyes fall shut, but even then, you didn’t think of it. For the first time in years, you just felt truly content. So content that your brain was satisfied not knowing what happened. You just prayed it stayed like that and wasn’t only because of postcoital bliss. 

When he brought a hand up to run through your hair, you snuggled into his chest even more and kissed him again, before letting yourself relax completely. 

Chapter three

fic timeline

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Tag list

@igotanidea @clairacassidy @phoenixgurl030 @halleest @emmerskiri @randomgurl2326

[jayladfanpage]

OPENED the first page of Robin lives #3 and just EXPERIENCED EMOTIONAL DAMAGE

fuCK. LIKE. GENUINELY. FUCK. going to consume raw bismuth rn im sobbubg I had hopes after they showed Shelia and just F U C KKKKKKKKKKK

I think writers forget so much of what made adtif adtif and what made Robin Jason Robin Jason. that boy was willing to give up Robin at that point for just a loving family? The issues that led to adtif? WHAT ABOUT HIS whole struggle and issues with being robin itself? what are we even doing here. Nothing is addressed. Instead we get fucking revenge story after revenge story I'm going to implode die. now I feel stupid about waiting for it. I'm half incomprehensible about most of the things I HATED. DICK. What is he saying. God.

I miss u robin Jason, he was so much... a singular character... barr's run... starlin too to a degree... UGH. HIS CHARACTER THESIS IS LOVE ??? ON GOD I will consume 2 tons of pipebombs today fucking hell on god he barely gets dialog, he barely gets shit, I liked 1 panel and that s it im

Anyhow :D yippie ! Happy to see that you're here for fanon writers and all ! Super cool of you ! And your posts are vvv cool, much love ! Would love to hear your thoughts on Robin lives#3 :) <3

Anon you are so incredibly fucking real for this

Issue #3 is... such a fucking disappointment. Exactly like you said, already the first page makes my blood fucking BOIL.

There's a fundamental misunderstanding, in this issue, of where Red Hood!Jason's ideas of revenge come from. His obsession with Joker's death specifically isn't actually out of a need to have Joker dead, it's a need to prove to himself that Bruce loves him more than he loves his mission. Which is not true for Jason or any of Bruce's other children. Gotham will always come first.

So to have Jason go after Joker with the intent to kill him (and succeed at it!) is spitting in the face of all the complicated, messy familial ties that are at the core of UTRH, for the sake of some sense that Jason was always doomed to be the way he is as an adult.

Jason also doesn't feel good after killing people. He doesn't derive any pleasure from it. He's not disgusted by or ashamed of the things he's done, far from it, but to him the murders are just a means to an end. A task to complete if he wants to save Gotham in the way that Bruce isn't able to. Murdering people sure as fuck isn't the "best thing" to ever happen to him. What the fuck.

I also really hate this page. As much as I don't expect any teenager to fully "deal" with their trauma, because they're a teenager, Jason certainly wouldn't run from it. Jason is perhaps the most openly emotional Bat character, and that's always been one of his most important personality traits. He talks about his pain and his trauma, constantly and endlessly, because Jason benefits from communicating his emotions, even if he does it aggressively or explosively.

Plus, "paralyzed with fear" ?? Jason's fear response is FIGHT not freeze. It's never been freeze. Every time Jason is scared, as Robin or otherwise, he responds by picking a fight. He flings himself head-on to the thing that's making him afraid because god fucking damn it Jason has always been good at saving himself -- which is why he's so desperate to have Bruce kill Joker, so that somebody else will protect him for a change.

This plot I'm conflicted on. I've always hated Timmy Todd and always thought that Jason should have been Joker Junior instead. However, this was not the comic to do it in. Robin Lives should have been a comic about trauma and vulnerability and healing. Main Continuity already gives us the neverending loop of Jason's trauma, of how it keeps constantly getting worse and worse, and I wanted Robin Lives to have been different. I wanted it to grab me by the shoulders and say He could have been fine. Jason could have healed. If only things had been different, Jason Todd could have been good.

But it didn't. It's just another fucking Cheer storyline where we read about a child being "doomed from the beginning" and shifting the blame of Red Hood onto Jason for being a lost cause instead of acknowledging the greater context of Jason's death and revival and it's just. Ugh. It fucking sucks.

Also, Bruce would never say this about saving like a dozen children. "Bigger fish to fry" WHILE HE IS RESCUING BRAINWASHED CHILDREN? where is my Bruce Wayne and what did you do to him

About the fanon writers -- thank you! I always find the hate for them a little misplaced. There are dozens of canons across hundreds of comics and fanfiction as a medium is supposed to have a certain degree of separation from its source. I think a lot less people would be upset over "fanon" batfam fics if the writers understood better core traits of the characters. Fanfiction isn't about "Would [x] do this" it's about "How would [x] do this" and a lot of non-writers don't understand that and just think fanon is always horrible.

[sagaduwyrm]

This may be an unpopular opinion, but I think that even if Jason found out about the times Bruce and Dick tried to kill the Joker he wouldn't stop being angry that the man was still alive.

It's my understanding that Jason wants the Joker dead for two reasons. One, to prove that Dick and Bruce really did care for him as more than "a good soldier." Two, so that what happened to him can never happen to anyone else. Attempting to kill the Joker in a fit of fury does fulfill the first reason, but it completely defies the second.

One of the main reasons why Jason is upset when he finds out about Tim is that "nothing changed." There is still a preteen kid flying around in tight pants, and the Joker's still there to clip the birdies wings. Generally, Jason's anger is interpreted as being upset over being replaced, but his actions suggest another reading.

Jason's modus operandi in his early Red Hood days is to kill those who cross certain lines, not to avenge the dead, but to safeguard the living. His analysis goes like this:

A criminal shows themselves to be a danger to the people of Gotham

Arresting the criminal might allow for rehabilitation, but more likely than not they won't even make it to prison with how corrupt the Gotham judicial system is. Therefore, arresting the criminal will not stop them from hurting others.

If jail was an actual option, Jason might take it. But it isn't. So in order to stop this person from hurting others, the only certain solution is to kill them.

To Jason, Bruce's rule against killing inherently means he fails to protect other people. Bruce is only temporarily stopping the problem.

Batman's philosophy is the opposite of Joker's. While the mad clown claims that one bad day can turn anyone into him, Bruce believes that anyone can become a better person if given the chance. This philosophy inherently prevents his character from killing. The character of Jason Todd is designed to expose the weaknesses in this philosophy, namely that giving someone the chance to change also gives them the chance to stay the same and continue to put others in danger.

Jason finding out about the times Bruce and Dick tried to kill the Joker wouldn't change anything. In fact, it might make things worse. Bruce and Dick only tried to kill the Joker while half out of their minds in grief and fury, and once they calmed down they felt guilty and considered their actions to be wrong. As far as Jason is concerned, they shouldn't be killing Joker because of emotion, they should be killing him because it's the only logical, certain way to prevent the Joker from hurting anyone else the way he did the second Robin. Learning about the incidents in question would just emphasize their philosophical disagreements and leave Jason feeling like the Bats have failed him all over again.

[betustamorla]

(Updated 01-07) Arkham Batman Beta reader/editor/consultant wanted

Genre: Drama, family, romance, hurt/comfort, action, slight canon divergence (in ages of the characters mainly)

Main characters: Jason and Helena

Pairings: Jason Todd/Helena Wayne (past/future), Dick Grayson/Koriand'r, Tim Drake/Barbara Gordon, Bruce Wayne/Selina Kyle (past)

Summary: Batman left Gotham to his proteges, no one knows if he is still alive. It's up to them to pick up the pieces, help each other, and sort their lives before big trouble threatens Earth.

Estimated length: 90,000< words.

Progress: 60,000< words.

Plan of finishing the first draft: End of July. First chapter release plan date: 31 of October

First scene sample:

This Arkham Knight was very troublesome, he was as dangerous as Batman, no, he was more dangerous than Batman, he was ready to kill, even eager to. Huntress touched her side, and a stinging pain answered her, but nothing to worry about for now. Her breathing was accelerated, her senses wired thin, her gaze fixed on the man in front of her ready to respond at his slightest movement.

"Move aside." His modified voice seemed to hiss.

"Sorry, but I don't feel like it." Of course, she had to goad him more, as if things weren't hard enough already.

"My business is with the Bat." 

She felt slightly confused at his seeming reluctance to fight her, but she squashed it to the back of her mind until she could be in a safe environment to ruminate. "You're endangering a lot of people with this... business of yours. So no, I won't be moving any time soon." She said flatly.

"That's too bad." It seemed like she had reached the limit of his patience. He lunged again at her. She dodged and threw a kick to his abdomen, he blocked it with his elbow, by instinct she flipped back, it was the right thing for his fist to fly inches from her face.

Still, she knew she wouldn't win this fight, her strength lay in the careful preparation of traps and sigil of her prey, even if she was a good fighter she wasn't, well, Batman. Now that there was some distance between them she started shooting bolts towards his legs, he dodged those easily and shot his grappling gun toward the nearest building and pulled upwards.

"Oh no, you won't!" She quickly changed her bolt to an explosive one and shot to where the grappling gun had hooked. He fell again into the roof they were on, rolling to minimize the impact.

"Now you really pissed me off," He growled and charged towards her.

Again they danced in a mix of punches, kicks, and dodges before he finally gained the upper hand and slammed her against the floor, stars danced in her vision, and his hand wrapped around her neck, cutting her air supply. Helena struggled, but to no avail, as he was at least fifty pounds heavier than her, but she had tricks up her sleeve, in fact, very literally. When pulling her wrist upwards a high voltage discharge would shoot on whoever was the unfortunate recipient of its full power would end up knocked out, which in this case was the Arkham Knight. She wasn't surprised when after receiving the electrical hit, he backed off but did not faint, the armor probably was designed as hers; to withstand the worst of such dangers.

"You have some tricks don't you?" He laughed, and she didn't like the sound of it. "But I think you won't have one for this." He gripped her by the neck again and pulled out a vial, unluckily, Helena wasn't fast enough to move out of his reach. The glass shattered between his fingers, and the contents immediately volatilized and turned into a gas. She didn't have any other option but to breathe at least a little, but guessing what it was, she knew it was more than enough to make its nasty effect kick into work.

She was shoved back, falling into her back, coughing at the acrid taste the fear gas left, her heartbeat quickened when the faint blurred sound of a familiar melody started to ring in her ears followed by a voice she thought she would never hear again.

“Here again my dear Angel?” The honied voice seemed to whisper against her ear, then a chuckle, and there, looming over her was the white-masked figure with amber eyes.

“You’re dead.” She breathed and gritted her teeth.

“Of course. You killed me. Remember?” Then his hand reached for her chin and turned her face towards one side and her heart stopped and seemed to come to the back of her throat at the same time. There in a chair tied with barber wire was Jason.

“Help me!” 

“Stop. Stop. Stop.” 

“Just kill me already.”

“Jason!”

She nearly choked. Get a grip, Helena, this is a hallucination! She felt her suit starting to slow down her increasingly accelerating heart, she knew that the fear gas she had inhaled was but a small dose, and yet it was messing this much with her head even with the Bíos pumping through her system already. This new formula was very, very dangerous, the whispers of Jason still lingered in the background, sometimes interrupted by the explosion that was imprinted like a hot iron in her body and mind. 

Then she felt the burning sensation of electrical currents run through her body to counter the other poison in her veins, the burning sensation of it made her gasp. But now she was able to take a coherent look at her opponent, he hadn't taken this opening to attack her, to end her, making her believe again that he didn't want to kill her. He was just standing there, looking at her. The knight was tense as if waiting for something, she was completely clueless at what it could be but she would use this to her advantage.

~•~•~•~

Jason watched as the gas kicked into action and she crawled away, then her breath hitched and she shook her head. Whatever it was, she didn't want to hear, she clapped her hands to her ears and closed her eyes, it would be so easy to kill her now… To put the broken body of his daughter in front of him, would break him like nothing else, he was sure. But he couldn't even bring himself to lift his gun and point at her, he didn't want to kill her, she had been- What?

It didn't matter, he had better things to do. He turned and started to walk away when he heard her breath his name.

“Jason!”

He clenched his fists, they had abandoned him to that fucking clown, they had replaced him and she had left, forgotten completely about him. But something was pulling in him to go and shake her, to tell her he was right here, that he wasn't a damned nightmarish apparition. He took in a shaky breath and cocked his head to one side, stretching his neck; an anxious tick he had developed. That was enough to strengthen his resolve to keep going on, she was just a part of his past that would disappear along the Bat. Bringing her to Scarecrow and making Bruce see his only daughter be tortured by her worst fears would be even worse than death for him.

Jason turned to her again, she was silent now but her respiration was agitated, she was very still, which was odd for someone with fear gas in their system. He walked closer, pulling his gun out. Maybe he should just blow her head up and throw her dead body in front of her father. The echoing of laughter surged in the back of his mind and the scar on his face burned like the same day the hot iron had sizzled against his skin.

The illusion broke when Helena launched herself at him, he was so unprepared that he tripped and fell on his back with her on top of him.

“Don't you ever dare to do something like that again asshole!” She hissed and punched his helmet hard enough to make his vision rattle a little. How she had fought off the effects of the gas he had no idea nor was interested to know right now, he curled his arms and then threw her off him. She rolled like a fucking cat and pulled her whip out.

“Oh fuck.” He muttered as he rolled out of the way of the crackling weapon. Maybe she was tougher to get than he had originally believed, at least she was more so than his replacement. Jason knew that whip wasn't just any normal leather thing, it seemed to be made of some metallic alignment, as if on queue the whip came down again, he dodged again though not fast enough as it graced his armor over his shoulder and the fucking plate had been sliced a piece off. Fuck, if that thing could slice off part of his armor it probably could slice his arm off as well, no wonder she hadn't used it until now. The no-killing rule was just as strictly embedded in her as her father. That thought made his anger burst.

Why? Why did they refuse to do what was needed to protect? To save people from fuckers like the Joker? If only Batman had killed the Joker the first chance he got he wouldn't had-!

He snapped and lunged at her quick enough to avoid the arch of the crackling shit and barrelled into her, she flew back at least a couple of meters landing painfully on her back. Disoriented enough to become too slow to react in time to make space between them to gain the advantage of her weapons, which were long-ranged tools, up close Jason was completely in control. He took full advantage of it, he punched her in the gut making her double over even with the armor mitigating some of the power from the hit, he didn’t pause, consumed by the red haze that felt so good to let loose. He pulled her head down to connect with his rising knee, she probably would have passed out if not for the face-guard over her forehead and eyes, Jason hit her back with his elbow making her go down. 

She was wheezing for air.

“Is it hard to breathe? Don’t you feel like you’re drowning? Like some cold hand is closing around you and pulling every last bit of life in you?” He remembered how it felt, to be hit over and over again until you couldn’t even seem to make your lungs work.

She coughed and choked- No, she was laughing. She was laughing.

Had she gone mad?

“It’s not so bad, you know.” She gasped and spat at his feet.

All the burning anger seemed to die out, leaving an empty cold feeling. His arm seemed to move on its own, grasping her by the nape of her neck, he started to lift her and she struggled uselessly as she still was too winded to gather her strength or wits. They were at the edge of the ten-story department building, it was at least a 30-meter drop from there to the cold concrete below. Time seemed to freeze, he took in her smaller frame, she seemed so small and frail compared to him, she always had…

Jason! Will you wait for me?

Then he pushed her, the back of her legs hit the small barrier of the edge and then she was gone. He stood there a moment then he heard the sound of crashing metal meters underneath. His heart felt like it stopped for a second.

~•~•~•~

DM if interested/curious or repost/share if you think someone else might.

:)

Check some of my previous works

[fandomfaeofveryfewf4cks]

Things I noticed the nth time watching Nimona:

Knight armour can get sliced through like nobody's business (Balister's arm), but can take a laser hit without serious, body-altering consequences (Director hitting Ambrosius with a laser made from the same one that apparently has the power to wipe out half the realm, or kill an Immortal being who doesn't feel severe pain from an arrow wound)?

...is this because Ambrosius' armour was made to be more protective than Balister's?

"She manipulated BOTH of us." Ambrosius says this about Nimona, who he had very few interactions with aside from her very blatantly fucking shit up for the institute. How did she manipulate HIM?

I guess it probably makes sense when you consider he was going to arrest the director, implying that he believed Bal AND Nimona, but I dunno. The little rat in my head started running on its brain-powering wheel at all the possible fanfic plots this could lead to.

Nimona as Ambrosius grabbed the Gloreth statue when they fell to the ground.

On the one hand, this could just be actor!Nimona putting dramatic emphasis on how even in death, the leaders of the realm will cling to their hopes and beliefs, or the golden boy finally getting to join his ancestor.

On the other hand, we could make it deliciously angsty (yum yum) and say it is Nimona's personal desire to grab the statue of Gloreth for reasons such as: taking down the monster-killer image of her former friend out of anger and sadness because she never wanted that image to be so true in representing one of the few people who ever cared about her even briefly;

OR, While trying to think about how she would act if she were actually dying, she reaches for the closest thing to a friend that she has, but this is her staging a false death, as that particular friendship was false so this is just fitting, isn't it?;

OR, They wanted it to spread a message that with the fall of the director, would come the fall of the corrupt system they live in, as well as the fall of this narrow-minded view of both Nimona and Gloreth's story as well as Gloreth and Nimona themselves.

Nimona freaking out about the arrow in their leg in the comic vs Nimona treating it like a little scrape not to be worried about in the movie.

This is really interesting to me. In the comic, it's played up for humor like Nimona is almost overreacting, then having Bal take care of her because he does care about her. This shows it as a bit silly, but so very meaningful.

Then you have the movie where Balister is freaking out and it's kind of funny because clearly Nimona is relatively fine about it, so he doesn't really need to make a big deal out of it. Then he helps her and is still very careful about it like with anyone else's arrow wound, and asks her questions so he can better understand them. Again so very important.

I love both versions of these scenes, I just am so curious about why they made such a drastic change.

I love this movie so freaking much. (I knew that already, but it bears saying for the thousandth time. It's just so fucking good.)

For this last one:

TW: mention of police brutality (discussed as a theme in the movie, nothing specific outside of the Nimona movie)

"He's got a weapon." It's not a weapon. It's a phone. But Todd (and who knows how many of the other knights) didn't choose to see it as anything other than what the director told him it was, and destroyed it as he was trained to do. This screams messaging about the stupid, dangerous, and harmful actions of too many police officers who don't check the situation for themselves before acting on "information" they gathered from insufficient data and/or unreliable sources, and combine that with profiling to make decisions that so often end up being harmful and even fatal to others.

[nastyboker]

The ghost and Molly McGee opinion (HUGE spoilers)

For some reason I have a strong desire to share my opinion on the finale of this show even though the whole thing was okay-ish.

First of all, Scratch is a blast and I love the grumpy adult learning how to be happy from a cheerful kid. Since season 1 I realised that Scratch was never dead, just so unhappy with his life he literally lost his spirit. Well that's the okay-ish part.

I really don't see much chemistry between Scratch and Molly. Molly is too much in the centre of everything even for a protagonist. She did impossible things multiple times with no explanation and Scratch was just a comic relief most of the time even though his character development was crucial. Unlike Molly, Libby and Darryl look much more organic with Scratch: they understand each other better on an emotional level. So, like I said, I love the trope but I feel like it could've been done better.

I don't get it, why would the whole Brighton's misery was the responsibility of the only guy that didn't even die properly? Did they just steal him from his childhood home and told him to mess with the whole town? Okay maybe he volunteered to do it just because he had nothing else to do but still what's the point of all that ghoul bureaucracy if they don't keep tracking deaths? Didn't other people die in Brighton?

But the thing that buggs me the most is that Scratch never really wanted to travel but he felt guilty as if he should've been traveling, because his traveling friend was awaiting for his company. And nobody ever told Scratch that It's okay for friends to go separate ways and one can live a happy life even staying at his hometown for all their life. Moreover, it was McGee's dream to have a "forever home" and stop moving. They really could show Scratch that his life was just as great as his friend's life and he just needed to look at it from a different perspective and probably meet some new loyal people.

Imho, I feel that Scratch already changed his attitude to the point he doesn't want to live up to anyone's expectations so all that is left is a validation of his needs and appreciation towards his life in Brighton that became a really nice town to live in. He could visit his childhood house and befriend McGees again telling them the stories about it.

Heck, he could even become a new mayor! I know he hates paperwork but their current mayor does seem to have much less of paper problem than dead people have, so why not? I vote for Todd "Scratch" Mortenson!

Or he could just take random gigs with Sharon and then open his own small restaurant biz, maybe probably. He could start sending videos about his life in Brighton to his childhood friend and she would come visit him, idk, the options are infinite!

Anyway, the show is okay but it could be much better written. Also I love the title The Curse of Molly McGee better.

[bluepeachstudios]

GitS Asks!

The boys still have some growing up to do! Nothing but Truffle happens like it does in canon, Ghost is just there for the aftermath. He doesn't really like his kids hanging out with someone he doesn't know very well, but he also doesn't want to talk to Todd, so--

@sam-the-friendly-ghost

Ghost's "again" tactic was one he learned from his dad, where Splinter would let (usually Raph) rant about something, get the anger out, and then Splinter would say, "now try to tell me that again." and it would change slightly. For Ghost and Donnie, it became, "I know you aren't saying what you really mean. I know you have a hard time saying it. Try again. I'll be patient. I can wait for you to figure it out." It gives Donnie the chance to mess up his words without judgement, to figure out his own feelings, and figure out how to vocalize those feelings.

I concur with this, 03 Don's power scaling is much higher in the "ninja" range and much lower in the "mystic" range, although that changes depending on if he was in season 5 or not. I agree my headcanon for the Rise boy is that they can take much harder hits without really even feeling it.

Fresh Ghost(tm)'s reactions to the beginning of the show would be a lot of "oh my god how have you lived this long without getting captured by someone". While the end of the show he's more like "OH MY GOD HOW HAVE YOU NOT ACCIDENTALLY KILLED SOMEONE OR EACH OTHER".

Either way I think he'd find them pretty cool.

Yup! They play it regularly as a training game. Ghost notices they train better when it's framed as a game, so this one is focused on stealth. So far no one has found Ghost yet.

Ghost has a different outlook on "bushido", which is a samurai code and not a ninja one. Splinter adopts and adapts it to teach his sons the concept of honor while still remaining capable of performing necessary duties to keep themselves safe. Ghost probably doesn't even call it that, as it's very incorrect.

Ghost considers it morality, and while he does teach the kids the concept of honor, he doesn't believe it's worth more than your life. His morality has changed since he's been separated from his brothers. He won't lose his kids because of a silly thing like honor.

Nope! Raph already has Ghost as a sparring partner, he doesn't need another.

[goldenheart-supremacy]

More Twin!AU things

✧Ambrosius and Todd actually knew each other since Pre-K because they were enrolled to the same prestige school.

✧They weren't really friends, weren't really enemies. They just co-existed.

✧Todd did think it was pretty cool he shared the same birthday with the son of the School director.

✧Then, the owner of the school [Modern Queen Valerin] adopted two children; Ballister and Nimona.

✧Nimona was still very young, so she mostly stayed with her new mother in her office. Valerin basically goes: "Yes, I can do my work efficiently while looking after my baby all at the same time, who do I think I am?"

✧Most of the students didn't like Ballister, but Ambrosius didn't like seeing the new kid all alone so he played with him at the sand box.

✧At first, he was just being nice.

✧He ended up really liking Ballister more than any of the other kids. New best friend.

✧Todd made fun of Ballister once, and that was the end of neutrality.

✧Ballister had to be Ambrosius's impulse control from then on.

✧When Ambrosius would come over the Boldheart household for a play date, Nimona would throw her baby toys at Ambrosius every chance she got.

✧It took a year for her to grow into liking Ambrosius.

✧Flash forward to the future.

✧For a Junior high school moving up to High school trip [So this happens in Summer vacation], Ambrosius and Todd finds out they were twins.]

✧It was due to an accident that required Todd a blood transfusion, but his blood type is very rare. It was one of those things were it was usually only family or relatives who could share the blood type.

✧Rudy Sureblade didn't have it though nor did he have any living relatives anymore, and he really didn't want to contact his ex-wife to check if she had it. It was a last resort idea for him. He checked if they could find someone.

✧Amazingly enough, they found out Ambrosius had it.

✧He still didn't like him, but Ambrosius isn't a monster so he was willing to donate blood.

✧They checked first to see if it was safe to do so with some lab test then BAM "You two are actually brothers."

✧Considering they also had the same birthday based on the hospital records, they put two and two together that they were twins.

✧Ambrosius had to dumb down the explanation to Todd how there was such a thing as fraternal twins.

✧The Director of the School and Rudy Sureblade told the hospital to uphold their patient confidentiality policy and keep this hush-hush.

✧Neither Ambrosius and Todd wanted word to spread that they're related to.

✧Rudy and Todd's relationship had already been lukewarm, so nothing really changed after the revelation except that Todd is more distrustful of his father now.

✧As long as Todd did whatever a student should be doing, and kept out of legal trouble, he could live and let live.

✧While his relationship with his mother wasn't exactly a warm one, Ambrosius did have some amount of respect for his mother since she did raise him on his own... Sort of. If leaving a secretary or whoever every now and then to attend important school events when he was growing up, whenever she was too busy, counted as raising him on her own.

✧Although ever the dutiful child, Ambrosius did accept that her job was important.

✧After finding out she kept a secret as big as him having a twin from him, he started questioning things.

✧Some point in freshmen year, both Ambrosius and Todd kinda felt getting disowned was better than being around their mostly absent parents.

✧Todd would still poke fun at Ambrosius and Ballister, especially when they started dating in high school.

✧Then enters Aerin Shieldstone in the middle of Freshmen year, and Todd is half the word of 'homophobic.'

✧The first half of it.

✧So Todd kinda goes up to Ambrosius one day, and the conversation kinda goes...

That's all... For now.

Todd: Okay, I'm accepting you as my twin brother now because I really need a brother right now. Specifically, a gay brother.

Ambrosius:

Ambrosius: First, what the fuck. Second, why the fuck?

Todd: How do I ask a guy out?

Ambrosius:

Ballister: I'm guessing third is going back to 'what the fuck?'

Ambrosius: More like 'who the fuck is the unlucky guy?'

[simpforfandoms]

Would they be a soldier, poet, or king?

masterlist

no one asked for this but I need to get this out of my head this is just the 4 most popular batboys but trust me when I say I got love for Duke, Luke, Cullen, etc. too.

Dick Grayson: probably a unpopular opinion but I think Dick would be soldier. The way I see it a soldier is someone who is filled with rage but not necessarily consumed by it. A soldier is someone who will continue fighting not because they want to, but because it’s all they’ve ever known. They crave that familiarity. There are many times in canon where we can see Dick’s anger but he doesn’t let it consume him. Yes there’s times where all he can feel is anger but he uses that to fight. Dick has been Robin since he was like 10. It’s all he really knows. He’s been a vigilante longer than he knew his parents. He knows he can stop at any time, but he doesn’t. He might not want to, but he feels that obligation. No matter how much he wants to stop he won’t. He dreams of a life where he can settle down, but he knows that will never happen. Dick will never stop fighting, and that’s what makes him a soldier.

Damian Wayne: A king is someone who has had their destiny written long before they were alive. A king is someone who was told to do things and they did. A king is someone who often wonders who they would be if they didn’t have all those responsibilities. Damian fits this perfectly. His fate was decided at a very young age. He was to be the heir of the Al Ghul throne. However, when he met Bruce his fate changed. He was now expected to be the next Batman. To be the perfect little robin. A little part of Damian expected it of himself to. Which is the saddest part. He feels that he’ll always have to be responsible for something because he doesn’t know who he is without it. The ideology that if he wasn’t fulfilling something for someone he wasn’t worth anything was installed to him at a very young age. He carried that thought with him everywhere. He is nothing without duty. So he continues his life trying to live up to everyone’s expectations never once trying to live for him. He only knows how to exist when he is needed. Damian Wayne is a king.

Jason Todd: Probably another unpopular opinion but Jason Todd is a poet. If we think in it in a more literal sense, his pain is literally for others entertainment. I mean poets often use their pain to create entertainment. Jason Todd’s death was and is still used as a punchline and entertainment. In a more metaphorical sense, Jason Todd needs his pain to mean something. He needs it to make a difference, because if it doesn’t what was it all for? That’s why he’s Red Hood. That’s why he doesn’t agree with Batman’s no kill rule. While all the pain and hurt are eating him up from the inside, Jason doesn’t want it to go away. Truth is, he loves the pain. He wants to live it. He wants to be reminded of all the trauma so he has a reason to do what he does. Because he has to have the pain mean something. He convinces himself that his pain is beautiful meaningful art. Which maybe it is.

Tim Drake: Maybe yet another unpopular opinion, but Tim is a soldier. He’s filled of rage. No one really knows why, but if I had to guess a large factor is probably due to his dads death. But the fury had been around since he was child. He does a good job of hiding it though. He burries it deep inside. He decided that his anger needed to be his biggest weapon. Anger is hideous if it righteous, so he used it to fight. He’s been fighting for as long as he can remember. He fought to become robin. He fought to be taken seriously. He fought his own voices in his head. Tim Drake is fighter. Like Dick, he wants to stop fighting but he can’t. It’s almost like it’s an addiction. It’s like he’s dependent on the fight. He won’t stop fighting til all his rage is released. Which lets be for real, might be a while.

[serendertothesquad]

Seren's Studies: Odd Squad UK -- "Oddtober the Thirteenth" Episode Followup, Part 1

LOOKIT HOW THEY MASSACRED M' BOI. LOOKIT HOW THEY MASSACRED 'IM. BARELY RECOGNIZABLE, THE LIL' SQUIRT.

Well...for those who have been in the fandom for a long time, we still have the memories. For those who haven't, I am so sorry. From the bottom of my heart.

Below the break for what I can only hope is an episode that delivers the same quality as "The Odd Ness Monster" before it, but probably won't.

I was going to make a genuine and honest comment about these two roleplaying as villains, but lemme set that aside for now to groan at who's writing this.

At this point, the only thing I'm in for is the obligatory sleeping agent. It's really the only way the man gets help with his taxes every year.

Now on to the roleplaying: this is, uh...huh. It's one thing to roleplay horror movie characters, but it's another to roleplay as criminals, even if they're harmless. Worse still is that these...at least appear to be Odd Squad agents, unless they're random kids from the street that wandered in here and started chasing each other. Do you really want two members of your employment body roleplaying as criminals?

...Changing my point. They prefer it so much that they include it IN AN ORGANIZATION-WIDE FUCKING HOLIDAY.

To be fair, Oddtober, in the meta sense, did include the premiere of "Undercover Olive", which had Olive dressing up as a villain. But at least there, it made more sense because it was part of a dangerous mission, and it allowed her to play off of Odd Todd as a bonus. Here, it's played for shits and giggles and can be replaced with any other festive event. There's not much sense to it.

So to put it bluntly: it's an ugly desecration of a beautifully-crafted episode.

"Because oddness is what brings us together!"

Well, yes, but also no. You two are on opposite sides of the spectrum. You want world peace. Villains want world domination, or at the very least, town domination.

"End of the Road" is a good example of this. The statement is posed of, "If the villains' powers are gone, then there's nothing for Odd Squad to do." Cue the rising of an avian alien creature from out of the water, which shows that, even if villains are gone, Odd Squad still has a job in protecting and subduing odd creatures.

Orli's specifically speaking of oddness fueled by villains, though. Odd Squad strives for normalcy, not for oddness. Combine that with the fact that villains are essentially criminals, and her comment doesn't exactly hold much weight. "Villains In Need Are Villains Indeed" brought a sense of mutuality between villains and agents, but it didn't exactly stick. Here, it seems like that would become the norm if the episode aired today.

Case in point: this is a flawed comment in a flawed episode in a very flawed season.

Ohhh...a time loop. Because we had that once before AND IT'S NOT FUNNY NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES YOU REPEAT IT.

Some jokes are a one-and-done thing, Omar.

Oh sure, you can dress up as a criminal. Bring one into your place of work, though, and it's a whole 'nother ball game. One that goes on Extra Hard Mode.

One villain...to represent all villains?

WEEEEEEEELL FUNNY I MENTIONED "END OF THE ROAD" THEN HUH. Would have been perfect for The Shadow!

Yeah...yeah...Orli is absolutely in the right here. You know how much oddness could be caused in a day? How many lives would be lost?

And that's how you know this holiday is hella stupid.

(On top of that, I'm realizing this is just a more stupid version of "The Perfect Lunch", And at least that episode provided us with a sprinkle of lore and loads of funny bits.)

Parched Pact sounds more like an MLP name than an Odd Squad name. (Editing note: Revoking this comment because it's Pat, not Pact.)

We also have another villain who specializes in dryness in the form of Dr. Dry, and really, if he can be in the middle of bumfuck nowhere, he can come to the UK and join Goopy Gus in the Forced Old Villain References Club. I'll still scream about it, but at least it'll make sense.

See, when Oprah does it, it's charming.

When Captain O does it, it lacks bite.

If even the chef has the shared "popping up out of nowhere" ability, then you know there's something up.

(On a side note: toast. What the writers' obsession is with Season 2 gags, I will never know.)

"Hey, you. You're finally awake. You were trying to enter HQ, right? Walked right into that jubilee, same as us, and that villain over there."

Genuinely shocked how audible this whisper of "he's here" is. Normally it would just be incomprehensible and implied.

*slaps on the English hypercorrection glasses*

If you're addressing Orli and Ozzie by name, there is absolutely no need to use the catch-all term of "agents". You failed the test, Omar. See me after class.

Is...hold on, who's that kid dressed up as on the left? It's not one of the Terrible Three, surely?

Closest I can guess is maybe Villain X from "Agent Overhill's Day Off", and if that's actually correct, this is especially insulting because that episode isn't even part of this batch like it should be. It's foreshadowing, but it's insulting foreshadowing.

See, one of the things that's so flawed about this is that the dude could just as easily lie. He can eat the plain food and say he hates it when he actually likes it, for example. No one's stopping him. There's no lie detector. He's a villain. He cheats and he lies. 'S kinda what he does.

And he doesn't even have to eat, or enjoy himself, or like the gifts. He can declare he hates everything off the bat and take the W. There are no terms and conditions.

*claps four times* THAT'S IT!!! THAT'S IT. THAT'S THE BITCH.

Pure cartoony villain, right here. At least if the episode's going down, we still got the cartoony hammy villain.

Oh. Bro got a plus one.

I mean let's be honest, they should have prepared for that.

Huh. Apparently Pact- er, sorry, Pat was keeping Square Squire (the finest student of Professor Square's class, thank you) in his hammerspace spine. And the dude is taller than him.

Still not any more impressive than Lady Bread holding the Form-Changer up by brute strength, though.

Never have I wanted to give an Odd Squad character an advanced lobotomy more than THIS FUCKING GIRL RIGHT HERE, Jesus Christ. There's fun stupid like Olaf and Ohlm, and then there's just bland stupid.

Also, is...is that a Brand X Coca-Cola pillow she has there or am I tripping? Is Coca-Cola canon in the Oddverse? Is there air?! You don't know!

I take back my earlier comment. This is "It Takes Goo to Make a Feud Go Right", UK edition. Now with 100% less obvious innuendos!

(I do appreciate Orli's only reaction is to give a nervous gulp, though.)

Because if it's too cold for you to go into the pool, get on the kitchen table and get swimmin'!

Only thing he's missing is an Oculus Rift.

Oh, this is a rip rip. Like three goddamn quarters of a rip.

Omar, what the fuck are you doing, bro? I can watch the show, I can do rewrites, but I'm not copying plots straight from past episodes. It's sad that they have a whole world to explore across 10 years and resort to reusing plots like this.

...Now kiss.

*begins doing a Mr. Krabs walk straight through the gates of hell*

I'm sorry, I keep replaying this, I keep hearing "Waterless Wilf", and my mind goes to "Water I'd Like to Fuck." Which is inappropriate, biologically impossible, and a sin against the planet.

...Look, I said I was sorry. Bite me.

Look at that bitch in the background.

She knows.

She feels no remorse.

She set this shit up.

She knows.

Fluorescent...Florie?

I- are you all fuckin' high? Were you people fuckin' high when making up these villain names? At least Parched Pat and Square Squire somewhat made sense. This is just "hehe alliteration funy" and that's it!

Ozzie's getting close to an Olivepalm, and that's how you know you dun fucked up.

I...don't know what the fuck Orli's doing, but that ain't it.

Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a piece of dry toast in my eye.

Or else someone's gonna die.

The man's got as many delusions of vacational grandeur as Obfusco.

The only difference is that Obfusco could reasonably accomplish a world trip in the span of a short time.

(On to Part 2!)

[philhoffman]

Phil as Gene in The Author's Voice, a 1999 Drama Dept. production of David Greenberg one-act play at the Greenwich House Theater.

Interesting little play—Gene is a "horribly twisted gnome" with a talent for writing. He lives in the closet and ghostwrites for Todd, the handsome but dull guy who serves as the public face of their secret partnership. "The world outside might be a painful place but every place is a painful one, so why not?" "Make me famous, Gene. I want to be famous. People will photograph me and write about me. I'll study how they see me and live inside it. It'll be like a home."

It received some mixed reviews, mostly due to the direction, but most critics praised PSH's performance: "Hoffman is a treat as the sly kvetch of a recluse whose machinations supply both laughs and a neat twist of an ending." This critique, though, is kind of hilariously prescient considering the role Phil would take a few years later:

Part of the problem is that Mr. Hoffman, who has created memorable portraits of more pedestrian losers in films like Boogie Nights and Happiness, simply isn't repellent enough, suggesting nothing more threatening than Truman Capote in a hooded sweatshirt.

The actor James Urbaniak auditioned for the same role and wrote a really nice article about the experience/PSH's performance in 2014:

Philip Seymour Hoffman enters. He is on the floor, crawling. Army style. Pulling his weight towards the desk. It takes time. His breathing is labored. The energy in the theater has changed. You can feel the audience adapting to the force that has just been introduced. The force emanating from a prone man pulling his big body across a small off-Broadway stage. He’s a big man and his presence is big, theatrical. But also subtle, inward. It rings true. This silent entrance contains a physical intensity and emotional depth that is nowhere near what I had done in my audition. And I am struck by the alarming realization that it’s highly unlikely I ever would have gotten there.

More info on this production is hard to come by, but the reason I read the play and decided to post about it today is a tweet I saw earlier. The thread was about method acting and how it can be done well, effectively, and kindly—without abusing other actors, crew, or anyone else:

Years ago, when I was an intern at the NYC theater company Drama Dept., Philip Seymour Hoffman starred in a play there. He introduced himself to each member of staff and told us, "I'm method, so please tell me if you are ever uncomfortable and I will break character." [He] was a pro.

One of my favorite little Phil stories I've read ❤️

[magicofrobin]

lyric analysis of wide eyes by badflower and how it fits jason todd's vibes. long post incoming. (tw: implied/referenced sa, character death)

starting with the pre-chorus and chorus rather than the lyrics from the verses because these are the most easy to understand.

PRE-CHORUS ANALYSIS.

my innocence was taken / i'll never be that boy again

the first line is the loss of his childhood. unlike other children he witness violence and addiction at home, as well as around his neighborhood. he took care of his mother and slowly watched her die because of her "illness". he lived on the streets after losing both of his parents (the grief for his mother was like a knife, the space where his father used to be was filled with relief). jason wasn't allowed to be a child, he grew up too fast because he had to. it was the only way for him to stay safe. for so long he lost that childlike innocence that tells you that the world is good and your parents will always love and protect you. he saw the world through the eyes of an adult when he shouldn't have had to; in an ideal world someone would've shielded him from this. from all of it.

it can also be used in the same context as the song, which has been interpreted as being about sa. in that sense his innocence was taken when talia manipulated him and brought him into her bed when he was under her care. in that sense it was about the blurred out faces and half remembered hands from his childhood.

the second line, to me, is about his death. he's not going to be who he was before, no matter how much he wants to. he can't go back. he's changed too much to be that boy anymore. he doesn't even view that boy as him anymore, it's easier to think of robin as someone else, as a ghost, than it is to admit it's him. jason todd and robin might be one and the same in reality but not through the lens of his trauma. this can even be seen in canon, when he's reliving his death and disassociating. he sees himself at fifteen, dying on the warehouse floor, being between to death, and he calls him robin, not jason. because it isn't him, not really.

i guess i'm only speculating / but there's no use in hearing the truth from a liar

this one is less specific but to me, it's about how he feels like the other bats don't trust him. mainly how bruce doesn't trust him. it feels like no matter what he says or how much he works with them, there will always be the sense that none of them trust him. if he says he won't kill then he's lying. if he says he's fine he's lying.

he has lied before. many times in fact. that was what red hood was in the beginning, a lie spun to hide his identity until he was ready.

CHORUS ANALYSIS.

true was the bride at the turn of our time

in the song the bride is referring to the catholic church, with that context, i think this line for jason's character is a bit hard to interpret.

but to me, it feels like it's about bruce's crusade and his time as robin. things were good and he believed in everything bruce stood for when he was robin. after his death nothing is the same, least of all him. he no longer believes in batman or his methods, the life he lived under bruce's roof is no longer true, it hasn't been since he ended up in that warehouse. it's almost like a loss of faith.

holding my, holding my / holding my life in your body

this one is obvious & not so obvious. there's different things it could mean but the most in your face one is: bruce finding his son's body in the wreckage and holding him, wishing that jason would open his eyes. it's so reminiscent of the every image of bruce finding his son in death in the family; jason’s limp body in his arms, him the picture of the devastated father.

its batman protecting his robin when they're out on patrol. jason's full trust in his dad to keep him safe. every night out as robin was a risk and bruce was always there beside him, pulling him back when it was too dangerous or picking him up when he was too hurt or too tired to carry on.

its jason holding a gun to the joker's head and demanding his dad make a choice: him or his murderer? one of them was going to die there and it was all in bruce's hands, whether he wanted it or not.

it was the way the batarang sliced his throat and sent him stumbling, releasing his murderer so he can grasp at his throat. a timer is about to go off and he's trying to stop the bleeding. this was his dad holding his life in his hands and choosing wrong. this was jason keeping himself alive, the only person he could depend on anymore.

in a meta sense it's the poll that killed him. his life hinged on the votes of fans. he would live or die based on whatever they called in and said. they held his life in their hands and voted against him. voted to see him dead. voted to see batman's world shatter with the loss of a child. they could've saved him.

i bottled up the pieces of the lie, of the lie

it's about putting his past behind him, or trying to. it's the distance between him and the rest of the bats. he's not part of them and his time with bruce was a lie, it wasn't real, that wasn't his family. he thinks he knows that now. he was replaced, they're happier without him. so he keeps his distance and he keeps all those feelings inside until they spill out and he's confronting a bat and it gets explosive. because he does want to be part of the family, he wants his old life back even if he can't have it.

its about all the things talia told him while he was healing and training. the whispered half truths that she used to manipulate him, so he would become a more willing pawn. she told him about tim and twisted it, told him that bruce never loved him, didn't even miss him. jason's body had barely been in ground before a new kid was going out in the colors that killed him. she doesnt tell him how his dad was self destructing, how tim thought he had to step in to keep bruce alive, how tim was just a kid taking responsibility for a man so lost in his grief he took it out on the world. she tells him how his death has gone unavenged because no one cared enough about him to avenge him.

she doesn't tell him how his dad almost killed the joker, he would've too. he was going to put his rules behind him and rid the world of his son's murderer. but superman stopped him (there might have been valid reasons but does it really matter?). she doesn't tell him how dick wanted the joker dead as soon as he heard about jason's death, how fucking outraged he was that bruce was letting him sit in arkham instead of six feet under. she doesn't tell him how dick beat the joker to death for him and tim and barbara and the only reason he's still alive is because bruce brought him back. she doesn't tell him that he was loved.

everything she's says is lies wrapped up in a thin layer of truth and he takes it as gospel because why would she lie to him? she's in charge of him, she saved him.. right? she should have no reason to lie to him.

who am i, who am i / to ever love you with wide eyes?

so much of this song is about his relationship with his dad and how it's changed since he came back to life. he's not the same kid he was, he's angry and wrong and he hates bruce for replacing him and for letting his murderer go on living. there should be no love left for him to give. but there is. there's enough left that it has him coming when his family calls and agreeing to nonlethal methods, anything to make his dad happy, to make his dad love him.

jason doesn't feel like he deserves to love anyone, least of all the family he doesn't fit into. he's the extra puzzle piece, one that came from another box and was so obviously out of place there was no mistaking it as part of the bigger picture. just like jason is with the family.

this line is him quite literally asking himself if he's allowed to love bruce now that he's broken all the rules. is he allowed to still think of him as his dad and want his love if he's not part of the family anymore, if he's not robin anymore.

going into the verses now, this part might be more select lines rather than the entire verse. we shall see.

VERSE ONE.

my love was only temporary / i aged, but kept the memory / and still it makes me shiver cold

this is all about losing the two most important parental relationships he's ever had and how it'll never stop being an open wound.

he had three years as robin, as bruce wayne's son, he knew it wouldn't last forever. he was so loved during those years, he wanted it to be forever, he wanted to know what it was like to grow up happy. but he died and he lost it. to him, the love he experienced then died with him. and now, as red hood, he knows it has. all he has left is memories of a time when he was happier and it's mostly his fault. it keeps him up some nights, nights where he's alone and nightmares won't let him sleep and he wakes up in a cold sweat wishing he could slip out of bed and walk the hall to his dad's room, seeking out comfort like he used to.

it's losing catherine when he was so young. it's the constant desire for more time with his mom that he'll never get to have. no matter how old he gets he'll always be that little boy shivering and laying beside his mom, hoping she'll wake up.

if i really wanted to, i could also tie it back to talia honestly. she made him feel loved so she could mold him into a pawn and then she betrayed him in the worst possible way. jason will never forget what she did and she will star in those nightmares that wake him up at night.

theres no place to hide the past we bury / so like the virgin mary / she lied to save the family

for the most part the latter part of this line is about catherine to me. it references how she tried to shield jason from the worst of things. she told him she was sick, not an addict. her drugs of choice were medicine to make her better, not the things actively killing her. she lied to him to spare him, to save him.

the first line is pretty on the nose to me. try as he might jason will never be able to run from his past – whether that's being robin or living on the street or being raised in an abusive household or his time spent with the league. nothing is gonna be able to hide it. even six feet of dirt wasn't enough for him to be rid of it.

VERSE TWO.

i am the dust behind the window / the darkness in the shadow / the stain under the pillow

the most standout line here is the darkness in the shadow because that's what he is, isn't it? he's the dark spot on the otherwise clean history of robin. (it means nothing that every robin has had their problems, none of them are innocent, but jason will bear the curse of that alone.) and when he was first starting as red hood, he was hiding in the dark and going through with his plan for revenge. no one knew, or could've known, that jason was back in gotham. he should've been dead, he should've been a ghost.

the first line is referring to his memorial in the cave. the suit he died in – that should've been destroyed, it never should've been kept, it just like robin should've ended with jason – is displayed behind glass. the suit is all that's left of a ghost.

and i'll be the perfect silent witness

this is a bit more of a loose interpretation than some of the other parts but this to me would be referencing the deal he makes with bruce about not killing in gotham. his attempts to repent and be the son bruce wants again.

i stink from all the bullshit / so feed me and i'll hold my tongue

the first part of this is similar to some of the things i've written about jason's internal monologue. where he's thinking about how he's not able to rid himself of where he grew up, like his neighborhood left a permanent stain on him. it's something he felt most intensely when he was attending gotham academy. he felt like the students and the teachers could smell the stink of crime alley on him, that they knew he was not from the same kind of people, that he was only there by chance – not by birth.

finally to finish up, here's the bridge which is so so fucking fitting.

BRIDGE.

rage! / i'm the bad guy, i'm the bad guy / i'm the cynical kid, i'm the rage

this is red hood. this is all red hood is. all of jason's anger wrapped up in a neat little bow and hidden under that helmet of his. he makes himself the villain in the family. he kills people even though he knows it breaks his dad's number one rule and it'll make it so he can never be part of that family again.

he comes back so disillusioned to bruce's methods because he knows! they don't work! gotham is still just as bad as ever! there's no way the city will ever get better if someone doesn't start cleaning up the streets and laying down rules and getting rid of the worst of the worst. which is what jason does.

as a kid he wasn't full of so much doubt. he genuinely believed he was making a difference but now he knows better.

i'm the big lie / i'm the goddamn shame of the goddamn pride!

jason todd was the good soldier! the plaque on his memorial says so! but that isn't true now is it? no, jason was the soldier who wouldn't listen in the end, who turned his back on the cause when he was shown the truth.

he was the angry one, wasn't he? that's what everyone wants to believe.

jason todd the good soldier. jason todd the angry robin. the robin who was always destined to go down the wrong path. it's true because bruce said it, isn't it?

his past is all hidden behind the lies of a man he still calls dad. he warps the memory of a dead boy to suit his needs, ignoring the truth of jason's life because it makes his death easier to deal with. it makes his return and his crimes easier to deal with.

because he's batman's greatest failure. his soldier, his fault.

he's the bat that makes them all look bad. he wears their symbol and he kills people. he thinks he's something that they're all ashamed of (and maybe they are. maybe he deserves that for what he's done.)

rage! / i'm the bad guy, i'm the nice try / i'm the typical bitch with the rage on my face!

pretty much the same as the first part of the bridge but i want to focus on the i'm the nice try part. because i feel like it reflects thoughts on his life and death. his time as robin was cut short but he did good during it, didn't he? he helped the people of gotham and he did so much good but it wasn't enough.

and then his death! it didn't stick! his resurrection is basically the universe's way of saying nice try! not even death could stop jason todd.

i'm the goddamn beast of the goddamn pride!

this!

jason is the member of the batfamily that's willing to go further, he's capable and ready to kill if it means protecting his city and his family. he's the violent one now and he accepts it. that's his role in the family now.

[bluejaysandblackbats]

Honor in Crisis

Fandom: DC Comics, Batfam, NTT, Titans, JLI, Arrowfam, Flashfam, GL Corps, Infinity Inc

Summary: Every chapter will focus on one character specifically and then I'll update their statuses in order.

This is a no powers au/fix-it fic for Heroes in Crisis. I wanted to focus on the characters and their healing. I decided that'd be easier to put some of these characters in a fic like this and work on it more from a real-world perspective. I DO want to say that I do not believe healing is linear so don't plan on a clear-cut happy ending. I'd say (and idk for sure) we're gonna eventually get a bittersweet ending for certain characters but nothing tragic.

Chapters: 9/?

Characters: Jason Todd, Bruce Wayne, Kole Weathers, Lilith Clay, Eddie Bloomberg, Michael Carter, Michelle Carter, Rani Carter, Grant Emerson, Roy Harper, Grant Wilson, Joseph Wilson, Thaddeus Thawne, Bart Allen, Helen Claiborne, President Thawne, Todd Rice, Alan Scott (DCU), Damon Matthews

Relationship(s): Damon Matthews/Todd Rice

Additional Tags: No Powers AU, Canon Divergent AU, Fix-It Fic, Angst

Chapter Nine: Proxy (Todd Rice)

It took nearly a month to adjust to the new medication, and things were finally starting to feel right again. Todd stood in the hallway, messing with his hair. It was an important day for him. He was deemed lucid enough to sit through an entire visit. A crucial visit, where he'd possibly have to discuss future care options with his family. He wasn't sure if his father would show up, so he was entirely convinced it'd be Jennie-Lynn. It had to be her. She showed up for everything. Unless she lost hope in him. It was entirely possible that no one would show up, and he'd be alone. He felt a wave of anxiety wash over him as he realized he might have to choose a power of attorney. That is if Alan shows up and decides to fight Jennie-Lynn for it. He didn't want to put that responsibility in his sister's hands. He adored her, and he didn't want the dynamics of their relationship to change. It wasn't that he didn't trust her. He didn't want her to deal with all the emotions accompanying making the hard decisions. Todd didn't want her in a position where their closeness could be jeopardized. Part of him hoped that no one would show up.

Todd's hand reached for the doorknob automatically, but he caught himself. What was on the other side of that door? Tough decisions? Judgment? Even worse, Damon? Would Damon come and have to discuss the ugliest parts of Todd's life and how they'd move forward from there? He didn't want their relationship to be overshadowed by Damon taking the role of a caretaker. Todd feared that there was no way of winning once Todd faced the person on the other side of that door. He barely managed to suck in a deep breath when his therapist, Ellie, opened the door.

Ellie was a rugged, ruddy woman with small, expressive eyes and a murky Southern Louisianian accent. She was short and frail-looking as if breathing was laborious, but something about her was comforting, maybe even charming. Ellie was more human than a doctor. It showed in her fierce passion for helping people. "Now I know you ain't gon' stand out there all day avoidin' my hospitality, Mr. Rice," Ellie scolded him playfully. Todd rubbed the back of his neck and followed her in.

He locked eyes with Alan, who looked like he hadn't slept in days, and wondered why Jennie-Lynn wasn't there. It had to be her. She had to have made him show up. Right? Todd couldn't move, let alone speak. He never thought Alan would show up. Not really, anyway. "You were probably expecting, Jennie-Lynn... I convinced her to let me do this. I needed to do this for you," Alan explained. Todd nodded, slowly, cautiously. He and Alan rarely ever had tough conversations. Todd didn't necessarily live up to what Alan expected, while Jennie-Lynn was the missing piece of his perfect family puzzle. It was the same for Todd, but he expected Alan to be more of an adult than he was about things. They were like oil and water. But, God, if it didn't feel like a relief to have him there. "You can sit down with me. I won't bite," Alan joked. Todd cracked a smile and sat next to him.

Alan raised his arm, startling Todd, who wasn't expecting anything past a friendly smile, and Todd flinched away. Alan fought the urge to give up and put his walls back up. He held up a hand of reassurance. "Can I hug you?" Alan asked. Todd swallowed hard and nodded. Alan wrapped his arms around Todd, and Todd hugged him back. Alan was warm, so warm it almost made Todd forget how nervous he was. Todd held on tight to his father and took a deep breath.

Once Todd moved himself to let go, he laughed uncomfortably. "Thanks for coming," Todd whispered.

Ellie sat on her desk and clasped her hands before handing Todd and Alan a small stack of paperwork. "Have you had the chance to talk with Dad-? Alan?" Ellie asked for clarification.

"Dad," Todd replied.

"Have you had the chance to talk with Dad about your concerns with entering outpatient?" Ellie questioned. Todd messed with his hair and looked down at his feet.

"I've never had a healthcare proxy before... And I didn't want it to be Jennie-Lynn or Damon... I didn't want to put them in that position," Todd replied. Alan read through the paperwork and nodded.

"Well, I could do it... But I want to make sure I know what you want," Alan replied. Todd was amazed at the types of questions Alan asked and how deliberate he was in his wording. Alan was thorough and patient as they went back and forth, discussing difficult questions. It wasn't anything like Todd imagined.

"Sounds like you've done this before," Ellie replied. Alan took a deep breath and frowned.

"I was married before... To Todd's birth mother," Alan explained.

"So, there's a family history?" Ellie asked.

Todd and Alan nodded. Rose was a bit of a sore spot for Alan, and Todd always wondered if he was ashamed of her. Because that would mean Alan was ashamed of him. "I was out of my depths back then. I was so caught up in my struggles that I didn't notice what Rose was going through. I didn't want to mess up this time... That's why I convinced Jennie-Lynn to sit this one out... I wasn't there as much as I should've been for Todd, and I had to realize a lot of my avoidance came from fear. I was afraid I'd make things worse," Alan confessed. Todd reached for Alan's hand and squeezed it.

"I got to breathe today... I finally got to breathe today... Because you volunteered to do what I needed you to do. I didn't even have to ask," Todd reassured him, "And you came for me."

Alan smiled with tears in his eyes. "I wish I'd figured this out sooner," Alan replied as he looked into Todd's eyes.

"What matters is you figured it out now," Todd comforted, "Time's up today, isn't it?"

Ellie nodded. "I'm afraid so," Ellie replied.

Todd stood up, and Alan rose to his feet as well. They stood facing each other for a while before Alan placed a steadying hand on his son's neck. Todd nodded before embracing Alan. "Are you gonna come back?" Todd mumbled. Alan tightened his embrace before releasing his hold.

"I'll be in town until you go home, so I'll be back every chance I get. Your boyfriend's been kind enough to let me stay in your guest room. He's insistent on having movie nights with me. I didn't know there were so many romance movies for... For-."

"Gay people?" Todd smiled. "Do you have a favorite so far?" Todd questioned as he walked with Alan.

"I thought Maurice was good. I won't lie and say I wasn't pleasantly surprised to see Rupert Graves as Scudder," Alan blushed. Todd chuckled.

"So, you like British guys? Noted," Todd teased.

"I didn't say that," Alan laughed, "What would I look like, dating somebody at my age?"

"Come on. You never know... Our future stepdad might be out there waiting for you to make your move. I'm not saying you should hop on Grindr or anything like that," Todd half-joked, "Keep an open mind... And whatever you do, don't ask Damon who Chloe Sevigny is."

"I love Chloe Sevigny," Alan replied.

"Oh my god, I'm dating your new best friend," Todd chuckled before they reached the front desk. "Well... It's the end of the line. Don't be a stranger."

Alan grinned and nodded. "Jennie-Lynn gave me a visitation schedule, so I'll probably be back tomorrow with Damon. Jennie's out of town visiting her friends, but she told me to send her love," Alan replied.

Todd exhaled once Alan left, and he smiled. It was pleasant. They really connected. It'd been so long since he felt connected to someone. Who would've thought it'd be Alan?