#there’s no spell check irl wtf?????

[ploffskinpluffskin]

im not logged into vanyas blog but i just need to say i think he should be allowed to be a feral little Snot sometimes

[hermiola]

Writer's Meme, 2024 Edition

I've been tagged by @turquoisedata 💜

-------------------------

How many works do you have on ao3?

14. 6 Good Omens + 8 MCU, but we have to go back to 2014 and 2016 for those. I also used to publish on an Italian fanfiction archive where I have 70 more fics (I went back to check and count them after approximately two thousand years and HOLY SHIT, I didn't remember them being so many! My first fic is more than 20 years old WTF).

What’s your total word count?

150.000 words on AO3. But I'm guessing it's waaay higher than that (the Italian archive doesn't show the word count 🥲).

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

My GO fics have the most kudos (given the popularity of the fandom + the fact that they're written in English and not in Italian). I have 6, so the top 5 is basically all of them:

Take a Little Love From Me (Pretty Woman AU)

Final Breakthrough (Now!) (Post-Season 2 Fix-It)

Crazy Little Thing (Called Love) (Non-S2-complying silliness)

When Hell Freezes Over (Human AU with magician!Crowley and critic!Aziraphale)

Let There Be Rock (First meeting after 1967)

Do you respond to comments? Why/why not?

I do! I don't get that many, so it's not overwhelming, and I just like to respond. As I said somewhere else, my experience in the GO fandom has been mostly a solitary one (recently not so much though!) so I just like to interact whenever I can.

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

I'm going to consider only the GO ones because I feel like the others have been written by another me entirely (also I'm not sure I even remember them).

So it's definitely Let There Be Rock.

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

I'd say all of them, but Take a Little Love From has a proper epilogue and everything. I guess their happiness has more space there than elsewhere.

Do you write crossovers?

I have in the past, but not anymore.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Not that I know of.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Not really. I LOOOOVE reading smut (especially in those chonky slow burn fics), but I can't bring myself to write explicit smut for some reason. I love describing the tension and the heat of the moment (I love UST so much I'm going to marry it tbh - like nothing makes me happier/hornier than two people who want to fuck each other but can't for some reason - am I edging myself? IDK) but when it comes to my own writing I feel like spelling out the details just ruins the moment. I do think it's my ace showing in some way. But, anyway, I read the filthiest filth so this definitely doesn't apply to reading. And who knows, maybe one day I'll try! I'm not ruling anything out.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so?

Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but I used to translate HP fics back in the day (from English to Italian). We're talking 20 years ago. And it's funny when you think about it, because I translate novels for work now 🤣

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, always back in the day with HP. I'm still friends IRL with the girl I wrote them with (we actually met because of HP) (this is as good a time as any to say FUCK YOU JKR).

What's your all-time favourite ship?

This depends on the hyper-fixation of the moment. I cannot multitask with my OTPs. If I get obsessed with a new one, I retire the previous one. Like I could split my life into different time periods just based on my OTPs. Ron/Hermione has been my personality for YEARSSSS, but now I can barely think about HP without cringing. Another BIG ONE was Clint/Natasha from the MCU (which explains my look here on Tumblr), but the MCU as a whole has gone a bit stale for me (with few exceptions). And now it's all about Crowley/Aziraphale - it's so bad I had to unretire from fanfiction writing after almost 10 years LOL.

(I like many other ships but not to the point of *obsession*).

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

The only one I can think of is a Clintasha Actors AU, but I don't think I have it anymore, and I wouldn't finish it even if I had.

What are your writing strengths?

Dialogues and banter are my favourite things to write, and I think it shows.

What are your writing weaknesses?

English is not my first language, so my writing lacks variety I think. I feel like I have always the same phrases stuck in my head, so it's probably kind of repetitive, especially when compared to some of the fics I read. (But when I started writing my first GO fic in English I wasn't even sure I could *actually* do it, so I'm proud of myself either way!).

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I think it's okay! I personally would ask a native speaker to help me (if possible) instead of going the Google Translate route. Being Italian and watching/reading almost exclusively in English I know how silly it sounds when the characters start speaking your language and they're saying nonsense (but no harm done even in this case, imo, especially in fanfics. In movies, though, it's just lazy!).

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

HP, back in 2004 (welp).

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?

None, thankfully. If I'm writing fanfic it means I'm in the late stage of hyperfixation and I don't wish that on myself if I can help it. Like I used to read 50+ books a year before GO S2. It's bad!!!

What's your favourite fic you've written?

Take a Little Love From Me mainly because it's the one I've spent more time with.

Tagging some people if they feel like doing it (but no pressure at all!): @beerok23 - @sabotage-on-mercury - @gaiaseyes451 - @leviosally

[greywindys]

show us the neopets! /lh (you don't have to if you don't want to)

Ahhh I'll do so happily!! I've been holding onto this ask because I needed a time where I could sit down and adequately screenshot everything. Warning for Neopets!! I'm probably going to use a lot of jargon that makes no sense to non-players, but that's just how it is. If you have any interest in more detailed explanations about wtf I'm talking about, I would check Youtube! There have been some great videos released in the past month outlining the mechanics of the game, the lore, recent events etc. Anyhow...

This is my Gelert, Lightning (misspelled as "Lighting" because little kid me couldn't spell). He is the very first pet I ever created. I might update his paint job soon to something more exciting, but I also like the simplicity. His petpet (recently painted Spring) is named after my IRL dog. I love them both.

This is Butters, my second oldest pet. Idk what I was thinking when I was naming him. Actually no, I do - my little kid self was edgy. But I can't ever part with him because he's from my childhood. I somehow managed to transfer him (along with Lighting) across two accounts without losing him, he is a relic. That won't be his permanent petpet either. I'm still figuring that one out 🤔

And here we are veering at least slightly on topic - my Lupe, Murdoc. Or Murdocs, since the actual "Murdoc" name was taken. I made him after a long hiatus from the site when I returned briefly (only to leave again up until now). If I truly wanted to commit to making a pet that represents Murdoc, I probably should have chosen a bug or reptilian species...but I don't want a bug or reptilian species ever. His petpet is a reference to the yak he got 2D during P5 fkadlfa. I'd like to ultimately find him one that looks like The Evangelist, but the petpet i have in mind is like, 10 million neopoints, or something insane like that. And I can't get him Cortez. Why, you might ask? Well...

This is Sanemi. His character has been a wolf in canon, but since I already had Murdoc, I opted for a cat instead, which I think is also fitting. He's typically associated with the colors green, white, and black, but his eyes are purple, so Wraith it was. The leaves are probably as close as I'll get to creating a "wind breathing" effect, and I'm working on finding him an appropriate sword (it's not going well jkadal). He has a few pets, but the only named one is his crow, Sorai. I don't want doubles anywhere if I can help it, so no Cortez for Murdoc.

This is Sansa, named for Sansa Stark from ASoIaF/Game of Thrones. Her petpet is Lady, named after her late direwolf (RIP). I couldn't not have a GOT reference somewhere, and I also love Woodland Unis.

This is Rusalka, named after my current favorite song by the Decemberists. I'm probably going to change her color to faerie soon-ish, despite the fact that I chose Maraquan in the first place because of the song and name reference. But they're bringing back the original Faerie Neopet art sometime this year, and I love the way faerie Ixis look, and I always wanted one when I was younger (I was too poor back then).

This is my second-newest pet, Kacchan. He's a Kacheek (Get it? Kacchan, Kacheek lmao). I finally settled on how I wanted my Bakugou pet to look. I still have to get him a few more accessories, namely a mask and a glitter effect, because in case you didn't know, canon Bakugou is literally sparkling right now. I also intend to change his petpet. The one he has now is just filler until I can save up for the paint brush I need.

And this is my brand new pet, 2Doc! Sjfkaldfj. I outsmarted the system - "2Doc" might have been taken, but Twodoc was not. She isn't staying that color, might not be staying that species, and definitely won't be keeping that petpet. She's currently call a "lab rat." It'll take to long to fully explain, but basically, if you collect a certain amount of map pieces, you can unlock the secret lab ray where you can zap your pet once a day. It's completely random and can changes species, color, gender, and stats. I plan on zapping her until it feels right, but I kinda want her to be zap Burlap or Plushie atm. We'll see what happens! In this specific pet's case, it's more about having the name than having an accurate customization.

And finally, this is my Giyuu/Sanemi pet. There aren't really a lot of references here, I again mainly thought it would be funny to have a pet named after a ship, and I created him at a time when I didn't think a 2Doc pet was obtainable. And if we're being completely honest, this ship is better than 2Doc anyways. I also love Plushie pets and the fact that most people probably wouldn't be able to tell that he has a ship name just from looking at the collection of letters. It's stealth lmao.

So, notably missing from this list is a Succession inspired pet. I more than anyone, want, no need to make a Succession pet soon, but the species I have in mind is limited addition, and can only be created on their specific day (the anniversary of the day they were first released). So unless I want to blow through half of my life savings (in neopoints, not actual money), I have to wait until April. Which rn, is what I'm doing unless I'm very fortunate in my dailies or weekly prize.

Anyhow, those are my pets so far!

[freeamoebas]

wow i sure love william grahamcracker

[jashne-bahaaraa]

wait WHAT

[sanzusbestie]

I wanted to make sure u wanted to hear it before telling u!! (bc what if u didn't wanna know then im here telling u a full story lmaooo) okay let's see if i can explain this 😭

(it may be triggering!!!)

we were in this weird place: it was very dark, u can barely see anything without a flashlight or something, and the air was thick(?) like it was super hard to breathe! you can't see the sky if u look up, almost like it's an underground place! in the center of that place grew a SUPER BIG tree, the tree was old and oh it was like a fantasy world or something similar. the tree is like the life source of the place, if anything happens to it, ppl won't be able to survive, or at least that's what i know!

the tree was in the brink of dying so ppl needed to constantly watch it in case anything happens. so, at the start of the dream, there was this weird person with a cape who wanted to set the tree on fire but was stopped before the tree got burned much. and cuz of that, two ppl needed to stay the night and watch the tree and us two were the unlucky ones 😃

oh also the tree needed to feed itself with some weird vitamins that apparently the ppl made? 💀 so yeah we also needed to bring those to the tree at night, meaning we had to get super close to tree,, and the closer u got, the darker the place was and the harder it was to breathe 😭

so we decided to split the task, i stayed to watch and light the path for u to leave the thing at the tree, and then when u come back, i go and make sure nothing happens to it while u stay and watch. u came back safely and then it was my turn to go and check, but when i went, everything went dark cuz u let go of the flash light, i panicked and yelled for u, then u came running and pulled me to the ground when a big explosion happened. turns out the supply u left at the tree were swapped by something else that was explosive, and bc of the heat near the tree, it exploded..

u said a weird man told u that and if u didn't want ur friend dying, u better go and see (as per his words) so yeah,, and then suddenly the same man was standing in front of us mumbling weird things in a language neither of us understood, it was as if he was casting a spell or smth 😭😭😭 then the man started going mad and he started pulling on his face until he ripped his skin off 😃 then he started laughing??? wtf 😭 and he grabbed us both on the shoulder and his skull exploded right in front of us 😃 when that happed a black liquid got everywhere including our body (it was like squid ink? but it came out of his body 💀) we started panicking and wanted to run away, but remember his hand holding our shoulder? even tho the man should've been dead, his hands had a tight grip on us wtf

then suddenly the man's flesh started forming back together and he came back alive as if nothing happened,,, he laughed like crazy in our faces and said something like "this is what happens when you..." and started talking in a weird language again....

okay that's all i remember, sorry this got so long :')

O

M

G

What a weird dream 😭😭😭😭😭😭

First of all, yk irl when the air is heavy I already don't like that but it's SO much worse when it's in dreams bc you're trapped ! And the tree is so weird cuz it's supposed to be the source of life but it also feels like the air is like that because of it, like it takes all the oxygen.

AND THE MAN !!! Your dream was already so stressful but that part must've been terrifying, I don't even wanna imagine his laugh 😭 And the fact that he touched us disgust me so much omgggggg !! And that's very mean of him to not tell what's gonna happen to us in a language that we can understand lmao

Your dream (nightmare ?) could be the scenario of a horror movie !!

Also, I'm curious ! Did I have a face and a voice in your dream ?

[paddooo]

recently i saw a post of an anon telling d*t*ctiveh*le to stay away from poor sweet innocent @farores-son 

well im here to say that @farores-son should be the one getting cancelled here

Ive met the guy irl and here is everything ive gathered from the most unpleasent times of my life

calls himself gay while calling me a f*g and q***r

enjoys problematic media like lupin iii and naruto

read and enjoyed h*mestuck

doesnt like pizza (wtf)

writes fanfic about charactors that are minors (ur an adult creep)

plays porn games and reads porn while claiming to be ace? we know there isnt any plot in hunie pop faron

i know i already said it but, he likes naruto ew

still has a twin bed as a grown ass adult

ate a fucking pizza pocket frozen??? wtf??

never read the communist manifesto

makes fun of the spelling of indigenous languages

literally doesnt know any famous people past like 2005 like buddy sstop watching anime for 5 seconds

passes the wrist check on pure technicallity

hates dogs

uses reddit *gags*

bullies me over who transed my gender

bullies me over who he assigned me kin

rewatches the same 5 sorrowtv videos on loop

loves his homophobic family members

is white and learning japanese

drinks beer

drank underage

drank the last of the fucking milk two weeks ago

likes straight ships (what happened to being gay?)

likes canon ships lol loser

thinks oil painting is dumb (what kind of artist puts other artists down?)

shames me for drawing porn

shames me for being horny

honestly theres so much more but thats just like some of the more obvious garbage he does, hes just an all around shit person and super rude and mean to me 

i dont know why anyone follows him when hes honestly so scummy

[artificialqueens]

Girl I Met On The Internet, 4/? (Crystal x Gigi) - Strawberry

Summary: Gigi and Crystal discuss things in person. Elites Only also gains a new member.

As soon as Crystal realized what was happening, she exited the Twitter app. The girl she had been talking to for months, the girl she had shared so many things with was Georgina Goode, who happened to be best friends with the girl who hated Crystal for no reason, because of course this would happen to Crystal.  

Crystal’s mind was racing, her brain instantly jumping to the worse case scenarios. Did Gigi know she was talking to Crystal this entire time? Was this entire thing just a ploy orchestrated by Dahlia to get dirt on her? Georgina was not gay, but Gigi was. Did Gigi even like her, or was Crystal just an experiment that no one would ever find out about because it was over the internet? She knew none of these theories made sense, she didn’t think Gigi had any idea who she was until now.

Gigi was freaking out. She had messaged Crystal, attempting to explain herself, but she had gotten no reply. Crystal hadn’t even read them. Panicking, she messaged Jan, hoping she would be online.

gigi: jan oh my fuckigng

jan!: WHAT HAPPENED? ARE YALL GFS??

gigi: …no

jan!: and why is that?

gigi: she literally goes to my school she sent me a selfie and i sent one back without saying that we’re irls and she just said what the fuck and now she wont message me back

gigi: i know u don’t like how rude dahlia is so im sorry i have to mention her but she’s literally the girl dahlia picks on for no reason i didn’t even know her name was crystal

jan!: W H A T 

gigi: what do i do

jan!: girl like i know?? this doesn’t usually happen to people.

jan!: when do you usually see crystal

gigi: i see her in the halls sometimes. she told me before that she stays mostly in the art wing tho

jan!: ok. tomorrow  go to the art wing and find her. talk to her. she’s probably not responding bc im sure it’s not a good feeling to find out the girl she’s been flirting with for months is best friends with the girl bullying her

gigi: god i feel so bad about that. i only stopped it once and i feel so bad

jan!: i love you but you’re a fucking idiot, gigi. you really are. go talk to her tomorrow and do better.

-

The next morning arrived faster than Crystal wanted it to. She was dreading going to school, knowing she couldn’t avoid Gigi forever. Thankfully, they did not have any classes together, but crossing paths was inevitable. The thought of seeing Gigi, even from across a crowded hallway, made her want to sob.

Her stomach started hurting because of her anxiety, but convincing her mother to let her stay home didn’t go over well. Crystal had convinced her mother at first, but as soon as she felt Crystal’s forehead to see if Crystal was running a temperature, which she wasn’t, she had insisted that Crystal stop pretending and get ready for school. She even drove Crystal to school instead of having her walk to make sure Crystal didn’t skip.

Crystal walked straight to the bathroom in the art wing. It was smaller, with only two stalls and the cell service was terrible; but it was vacant for the most part. She often stayed there when she wanted to skip class, and the only person she had ever encountered was Aiden, a shy girl from her art class. If Gigi was looking for her, this bathroom would be the last place she would look.

She had spent the morning sketching and listening to One Direction. She was in the zone, barely noticing when the door opened. Crystal didn’t bother looking up when she felt someone’s presence there, assuming that it was Aiden. “Hey, Aiden.”

“Uh,” Gigi started, “Crystal?”

Crystal’s head shot up, her eyes wide as she looked at a very relieved looking Gigi. “Oh, shit. Hey.” 

Gigi walks over to her, kneeling down to be at the same height as Crystal. “I know you’re probably upset with me, but can we talk? Please? I’ve been looking for you all period.”

Crystal nodded, moving her backpack to make a spot for Gigi to sit down. “Sorry I said what the fuck and dipped, I really didn’t know what else to do.”

“I’m the one who should be sorry. I’m going to sound like such a bitch but I didn’t even know your name until last night.” Gigi had never been good with names, only being able to remember her online friends’ names in the beginning because their name was attached to everything they did. Crystal had been known to Gigi as ‘Art Girl’ until last night.

Crystal had to laugh at that. “It’s fine. I don’t think Dahlia knows what my name is either, and I’ve lived in her mind rent free for years!”

“Speaking of her, I’m so sorry I only stopped her once. I didn’t want to get into it but I realize now that ignoring it is just as bad as joining in. Especially seeing the effects it has on you first hand, and now that I know I could’ve helped.”

Last night, Crystal gave Gigi a run down on every single color she had ever dyed her hair, and she had mentioned that she stopped dying her hair once she got into high school because she didn’t want to stick out even more, in fear of getting treated worse. It had made Gigi sad then, and knowing she could’ve changed that made her feel even worse. 

“Yeah, I don’t know how this is going to impact your real life, but no matter what I just hope you will step in next time.” 

Gigi reached over to grab Crystal’s hand and squeezed it gently. “I will never let her hurt you ever again. I care about you so much.”

They sat in silence for a few moments.

“Can I tell you something?” Crystal asked quietly, avoiding Gigi’s glance. 

“Of course. You can tell me anything.”

“I really like you. I know it’s probably weird now, since you’re not out and I’m not positive you feel the same, but I feel like I should tell you.”

Gigi smiled, placing her fingers under Crystal’s chin, lifting them up to make Crystal make eye contact with her. “I’ve been hoping you would say that.”

Crystal blushed at the contact. “Really?”

“Of course! You’re the most interesting person I’ve ever met. I would be such a fool not to like you back.”

The bell rang, interrupting their moment. Gigi pulled away, pulling her phone out of her jacket pocket to check the time. “Fuck. I have a test this period.”

“It’s okay. We can talk about this later,” Crystal reassured her, standing up even though she had no intention to go to her next class, “I can send you my address and we could meet after school?”

Gigi nodded, pulling Crystal into a tight hug. “This is the most emotion I’ve ever shown at once. I thought it was going to be scary but I feel so much better. Thank you for talking to me. If I was you I don’t think I would’ve.”

“I could never not talk to you.”

-

Crystal decided she would stay in the bathroom until lunch. It was mostly out of laziness, as her Gigi related anxiety was long gone. Doing academics was the last thing she felt like doing now. 

She had plenty of entertainment, she had missed a lot on Twitter, and had two thousand new messages from the group chat, even though she was gone for less than a day.

crystal: im skipping class what’s up ladies

jan!: hi crystal!!!

jaida: girl where have you been?? my world has been so empty

nicky: wtf jaida stop acting like i don’t exist

crystal: ehh personal things happened so i was ia. i dyed my hair green last night tho!! look!!

jan!: omg you’re so pretty

jaida: HOT HOT HOT

nicky: crystal. marriage now

heidi: omg girl you look so good!! i love your leprosy print shirt

heidi: leprosy

heidi: girl how do you spell lepord

heidi: leopard

heidi: there we go

nicky: you did it!

jaida: so proud of you

She was relieved they didn’t question her further, but she couldn’t help but be curious about what their reactions would be if they knew what was going on. Talking to the girls again made time go by extremely fast, before Crystal knew it the bell rang, declaring it lunch time.

She hadn’t eaten breakfast due to her anxiety from this morning, and just realized how hungry she was. Collecting her stuff, she exited the bathroom and headed down to the cafeteria. 

When she was in line to pay for a slice of pizza and a bag of pretzels, she had caught the attention of Dahlia, who didn’t hesitate to express how she felt about her new hair. 

“Ew, who in their right mind would dye their hair green?” Dahlia loudly asked Gigi, making sure Crystal was in ear shot. 

Before Crystal could defend herself, Gigi spoke up. “Dahlia, can you please shut the fuck up? No one cares what you think about Crystal’s hair, it looks fine. I can hardly tolerate you being rude anymore.”

“Georgina, what the fuck? I’m not rude!” Dahlia whined, making Crystal smile. She had been slightly surprised that it happened so soon, but she was happy Gigi stepped in.

Crystal paid and made sure to wave at the girls on her way out. Gigi waved back, and Dahlia looked the other way, her arms crossed.

-

crystal: it’s not that i didn’t believe you but i’m shocked that actually happened..

gigi: she’s lowkey mad at me but idc

gigi: i believe you owe me ur address? 

crystal: oh that’s right!

gigi: i have cheer after school but i can come over right after

crystal: yay!!! 

The rest of the day was painfully long. Every minute felt like an hour, Crystal was even bored during her art class. She couldn’t wait to go home and talk to Gigi.

She zoned out while she was walking home, wondering what could happen tonight. Crystal would like to think that Gigi was about to kiss her before they got interrupted, or maybe she was going to ask Crystal to be her girlfriend. Anything could happen, and Crystal couldn’t really tell how she felt about it.

When she got home, she tidied up her room. Her bed was unmade, her dirty clothes were on the floor, and a couple dirty cups littered the top of her night stand. It wasn’t too bad, Crystal would usually consider this clean for her, but it made her feel slightly embarrassed now. She had the urge to fix it, even though Gigi probably wouldn’t have cared too much if Crystal left it the way it was.

After her room was clean, she still had some time to spare before Gigi would be on her way. She headed to the group chat, curious to see what chaos they were up to currently. 

nicky: ADD HER

nicky: ADDD HEEERRRRR

jaida: jan please come back i hate it here

crystal: who are we adding?

nicky: JACKIE

jan!: NO WE WILL NOT BE ADDING HER

nicky: why :(

jan!: i can’t trust you guys to not embarrass me in front of her and she is not a stan!!! she will not understand any of you!

jaida: we don’t have to embarrass you, you’ll do it yourself. we can teach jackie stan language, she’s smart and she’ll catch on

nicky: JAIDAHJKFDGLK

crystal: omg add her

jan!: i hate you all so much

nicky: PLS

jan!: fine.

jan! added Jackie

jan!: jackie, these are my friends. don’t believe anything they say about me.

Jackie: Oh, hello everyone!

nicky: YAAAS JACKIE NATION

nicky: c’mon auto caps!

crystal: hi!  

jaida: hi jackie!

heidi: i leave to play animal crossing for 15 minutes and we get a new member… smh

nicky: not just any new member! it’s jackie!!!!

jaida: the way nicky likes jackie more than jan does

heidi: that’s impossible. jan is SUCH a simp for jackie

Jackie: What? 

crystal: OMFG

Jackie: Does that mean she likes me? I’m confused.

nicky: yes!

Jackie: That’s good. I would assume that Jan likes me, especially after what we did in my car earlier.

crystal: holy fucking shit

jan!: OMFGHFJSKDSFHJDFJK UH

jan!: JACKIE SHUT UP!!!!!!

Jackie: Why?

jaida: god i love it here

gigi: janet you better tell me everything later!!!

jan!: GET YOUR MINDS OUT OF THE GUTTER!!!!!!!

Crystal was so invested in the train wreck going on, only focusing on the messages sent by Jan and Jackie that she didn’t notice Gigi had come online until she got a notification that Gigi sent her a private message. 

gigi: im on ur street :)

Crystal ran to the door, opening it the second she saw Gigi step onto the porch. Gigi jumped, not expecting it. “Someone’s eager to see me, huh?”

Crystal blushed, letting Gigi in. “Shut up.”

Gigi kicked off her shoes and sat her backpack down next to them before letting Crystal lead her to her room. It was colorful, lots of posters and canvases covering the hot pink walls. “This is very you. I like it!”

“Thank you!” Crystal exclaimed, taking a seat on her bed and patting the space next to her. Gigi gladly sat next to her. 

“This is just really weird. 24 hours ago, I didn’t know who you were and now you’re in my bed. It’s kind of overwhelming,” Crystal blurted out, making Gigi frown. “But not in a bad way!” She clarified, “It’s just a lot to process.”

“Oh, yeah. It is a big change. Last night, I was going to ask you to be my girlfriend, but that obviously did not happen.” Gigi blushed, grabbing a throw pillow from Crystal’s bed to hide her face in. 

Crystal took the pillow away from her, sitting it next to them, “Do you still want me to be your girlfriend?”

Gigi nodded. “Yeah, but I don’t know if we should become official yet. We know each other so well, but I feel like we need to see if we vibe in person.”

“I don’t think we will have an issue with that, but I agree. Let’s take it slow. But can I try something first?”

Gigi grinned, “Yeah, what?”

“This.” Crystal whispered, leaning forward until her lips pressed against Gigi’s. Gigi kissed her back, wrapping her arms around Crystal’s neck and pulling Crystal even closer.

[chwe-y]

thank you @louisalbums for tagging me in the impossible tag game bc lbr its impossible to settle on just 1 favorite picture of louis in any category but an attempt shall me made

first up favorite on stage picture now im going to cheat a bit and choose 2 but like im sorry i can't narrow it down further

next is favorite picture outside and this one is easy in that i know exactly what day the picture is from but hard bc there are like a thousand but its obviously zouis with eli uwu

next up is favorite outfit and i have an entire folder dedicated to this topic so to say this was hard is an understatement its near torture to choose just one but this one maybe bc its like louis looking the most like your childhood bestfriend and i love whenever louis looks like an excessively beautiful version of someone i could know irl

next up is favorite hair style and like im basing this on the hairstyle i miss most so whole i have like an proper top 5 list the peaky blinder cut is the one i would like to see back soonest i mean just LOOK at how beautiful

next one is favorite model moment hehehe i know these are 2 different pictures but like any time louis shows off his perfect profile im lik3 ☺☺☺

then it was favorite picture of louis eating which like how cute is he (was super tempted to put a picture of louis with his 1 true love redbull coz that's my diet essentially but this one won out)

next up is a fun one its favorite tattoo and mine is the pacman tat because its the cutest but its also surrounded by bus1, noughts and crosses tat, the fat bird, the arrow and the x smiley like hello peak aesthetic

and then lastly it was favorite louis picture ever and that's just impossible like wtf ever??? ever???? i can barely commit to a meal plan now i have to commit to an absolute no way impossible but for today its this one probably

okay so i would like to tag @aliensyndrome @princewu @kindofsharethat @allwaswell16 and @sexlouisfrustrated and anyone else who sees this and wants to put more louis on the dash pls 🙏🙏🙏

pls excuse any spelling errors i have not checked over this sksksks

[shinigami-cat]

4, 5, 38? :)

4.  name three authors that were influential to your work and tell why 

Stephen King; To be honest the first stories I ever read that weren’t  mandatory by school was a first edition of Carrie and then a small collection of short horror stories. I honestly really loved how all this stories flowed, until the endings... Most of the endings were kind of meh to me. I have apparently been told I have a writing style similar to his.

H.P Lovecraft; I am completely in love with cosmic horror and I was always to happy that most of his stories are short. Also made me reevaluate what I think of as horror and how our fear of the unknown can be twisted into something monstrous (dude was a super hella racist. Interesting guy, but I would probably glass the fucker if I ever actually met him irl). His cosmic horror really took seed in my mind and it just opened up all kinds of ideas to me.

Junji Ito; This mofo... This son of a bitch (he writes manga so still counts). His stories are super disturbing and the images haunt my dreams. I love how random and unexpected, yet totally believable the settings are. Not like they are actually believable but like, you read it and can believe that there is this totally wtf thing happening in  a totally normal town or place. I try to do something similar with my writing

lmao they are all also horror writers so there is that too XD

5. since how long do you write? omg... So I started writing back in 2011? So like yeah. Almost 9 years now. lmao. Damn, I really need to write my own book at this rate XD

38.  do you reread your own stories? Yep. All the time. Usually to see if I made spelling mistakes. Then I curl up and die when I see that shit. Also sometimes I need to re read a chapter to double check things for plot consistency. Does not stop the inconsistency. fml 

[readbythestarlight]

c2e24 reactions

Sam’s rejected ads

“All over my Emmet Smith commemorative snuggle!”

“IT’S A TROY AIKMEN SNUGGIE!!!”

SAM THAT SONG ROUGH DRAFT WASN’T FUNNY omg

I like how Sam’s ads are clearly 90% to make his friends die of laughter and 10% to actually promote D&D Beyond

Not immediately knowing that Jester was drawing a dick with her sparkler smh

Fjord seems really not sure about this town and I love it

Marisha/Beau meanwhile is really into it

I like how Fjord, the shiftiest fuck in the group, is concerned about other people being shifty fucks

I MISS YOU ASHLEY SOMEONE BUY YASHA A FLOWER NECKLACE

Beau just bought so many explosives

BEAU BUY FLOWERS FOR YASHA

the flower vendor’s voice I’m crying omg

omg they’re gonna explode the firecrackers with firebolts in the street these nerds

They are all so giggly tonight I love them

Oooo here we go Jester on the piano

“I’m going to sit down and try to play Chopsticks” I knew it xD

“blamblamblamblamblAMBLAMBLAMBLAM”

Beau and Molly with their charisma flops

“I like you, you’re colorful.” Molly flirting with the innkeeper is giving me life

Oh god drinking contest later

Fjord is regretting sharing rooms with Molly now lol

They are being SO GOOFY tonight I’m living

Aww they ended up with a sad babby outcast gnome

Molly stepping in like a total dad

MOLLY HAS THE WORST CHARISMA AND INTIMIDATION

oh fuck this gnome punk flicked him off

omg Molly blood maledict?? ….actually since it won’t hurt him he probably deserved it.

GUYS OMG

So is tiny gnome chick’s name Reesa?

Beau continues to prove that she is the ultimate disaster lesbian

Nott and Jester choreographing a dance oh boy

TEAM DRINKING COMPETITION OMG

DONT. FUCKING. LEAVE. KIRI.

sure Nott let’s pay a working woman to babysit your baby bird

YA’LL. DON’T.

Oh right just have Yasha babysit Kiri that’s using your noggin there Molly

The innkeeper flirting with both Molly and Fjord

IM

CRYING

Fjord is so awkward

“She’s small, I can hold her down” Matt that was perfect and the most in-character way you could have played Yasha

Please stay safe Kiri my baby bird daughter child light of my life

OH DAMN JESTER

Jester being jealous trying to be catty with the innkeeper

B: “Did you just put a hooker on layaway?”

F: “Did you just say I’d had sex with your mom??”

J: “Yeah as soon as I said it I realized it sounded really creepy.”

Insight checking to find out if Fjord is a virgin omg

Caleb back to looking for bookstores that’s my boy

Molly please tell me you’re getting flowers for Yasha

Ah frick Nott you should be more careful please

Aw Nott don’t be sad :(((((

I’m glad Beau is trying to reassure her about not feeling bad about herself

Ooooo some Beau backstory

lol Beau was a bootlegger juvenile delinquent I love her even more

Holy shit her dad paid the monks to abduct her no wonder she has issues with authority

Jester is basically offering Fjord free sex at this point she wants him real bad

Meanwhile Travis is dying

Yoooo my boy found his bookstore

They’re closed, of course. But he can go back in the morning.

SOMEBODY BUY YASHA A PRETTY SILK FLOWER THING DAMMIT PLEASE

Matt’s little girl voices are the fucking cutest things help me

Jester setting up a playdate for Kiri I’m not crying you are

Tara is the cutest baby gnome child ever

Save a flower for Yasha please I’m literally begging

Caleb encouraging Nott to dance my heart

The Wand of Smiles thing kills me every time they use it

Matt is having WAY too much fun playing this innkeeper dwarf

30 gold just to get blackout drunk my god

Caleb needs to blackout he’s probably a lightweight

Oh damn wait Jester should probably

If anyone wins this for them it will be Nott she’s practically always drunk already

Aw poor Jester

Matt stop with all these adorable bird and gnome children I want to adopt them all

NOTT’S GONNA USE THE DAILY LUCK smart girl

SCOREBOARD TIME Molly’s round: Molly: loses, wins, wins, wins Duncan: wins, loses, loses, loses MOLLY WINS and he’s drunk as fuck Beau’s round: Beau: TIE, wins, loses, wins, loses, loses Ruth: TIE, loses, wins, loses, wins, wins Beau loses… and pukes. Ew. Caleb’s round (oh boy…): Caleb: WINS, loses, loses, wins!, WINS!!! Valkin: loses, wins, wins, loses, loses (Nott and Jester distraction dance) CALEB WINS WITH A NAT20 HEEEELLL YEAH THAT’S MY SON THAT’S MY BOY Fjord’s round: Fjord: wins, loses, WINS!, WINS! Tanya: loses, wins, loses (loooool fjord flirting with his competitor) (Jester plz stop you’re gonna make Caleb puke) FJORD WINS WITH DOUBLE NAT20s OMG!! oh no don’t do it double or nothing please oh god they’re gonna do it here we go Nott’s round (please kick his ass Nott plz): Nott “Otto The Bottomless Pit”: wins, wins!, loses, WINS!!!!!!!!!! Blemy “The Whale”:  loses, loses, wins, loses (making herself look gross lol. And using mage hand to pour. Jester trying to bless him.) NOTT WINS HEEEELLLL YEAH

I really thought they were all gonna lose omg

oh no

oh thank god he passed out before he could out her as a goblin

WOOOO FREE DRINKS

Please go to bed everyone

“The mighty nein, the mighty nein, the mightiest nein to ever neeeiiiinnn”

There’s a lot of love between this group right now. They just need to be wasted to show how much they like each other lol

Awww Jester and Caleb waltzing that’s cute

Molly and Nott join in and suddenly its a dance party

OH SHIT CALEB SAID SHIT HE SHOULDN’T HAVE SAID I’m crying he was into Astrid and now he’s sad

And Jester gets him into bed I CRY

I didn’t need Caleb feelings WHY

Wait what is Molly doing?

Ah blood magic stuff

I’m beginning to expect that Taliesin is drunk irl

MOLLY OMG THAT’S DISGUSTING

Matt’s just like “no, no, we’re not doing that no” he’s a total dad

BEAU GOT PICKPOCKETED

she lost 300 gold wtf

who was close to her I can’t even think of who it might have been

THEY HAVE ALL BEEN PICKPOCKETED

OH MY GOD

NOTT, MOLLY, FJORD, CALEB, AND BEAU HAVE ALL BEEN ROBBED

that’s bad

The only inconspicuous figure I can think of is the little girl but I mean…

Are they gonna accuse the little gnome girl omg you guys I wasn’t serious

Whatever happened to Reesa/Risa?

Oh there she is

JESTER DO NOT

Hnnn they gotta learn not to cast the spells so casually on people it’s gonna come back to bite them in the ass

Awww buying Kiri a cute little music box

Repeating crossbow aw damn Nott’s gonna want it real badly

ENCHANTED repeating crossbow

“The Tinkertop Bolt Blaster 1000”

two thousand gold i choked

REESA BE NICE TO YOUR ADORABLE DAD

Reesa and her dad are adorable I like them

Casting suggest sure let’s just cast more spells on random people smh

You made Fitz cry you guys and you’re probably gonna get them fires it’s not their fault you were dumb enough to get robbed this is a dick move I’m with Jester y’all are taking it too far

Okay good at least now they won’t get fired

OH OH OH THEY GOT A BLIP CHASE IT

god please protect kiri she only has 6hp guys please

IT WAS THE KID OMG

Molly’s about to give him all his gold look at his face

Or Beau will give them gold and Molly will give them advice on how to steal and not get caught stealing xD

…Fjord are you seriously planning a jailbreak right now

Do you even know anything about the prison

Nott is like “the solution is obvious we just adopt them like we adopted Kiri it’ll be great it’ll be fine”

…Fjord that’s soft and sweet I hate you because I can’t decided whether I love you or not

Nott playing on Beau’s backstory to try and prompt her to help find the kid’s parents

“leaving them as cold heartless resting bitches” xD

FJORD KEEPS BEING NICE AND IM. JUST. I WANNA JUST KEEP PICTURING YOU AS A SHIFTY FUCK STOP BEING SO NICE

Also yeah listen Fjord grew up in an orphanage

aw Fjord…

Caleb’s a little salty about this but Caleb come on they’re kids

I can’t believe they’re gonna try to pull off a jailbreak

Leave Kiri with these kids yes and now Matt I beg you do NOT, do NOT let her get dragged away please I beg you

Matt’s ability to perfectly mimic Fjord/Travis is amazing

MAN THIS WAS POSSIBLY THE BEST EPISODE? I loved it. I was laughing so hard for all the first half. Fantastic job @the cast

[strawberryspeachy]

K. I know alt stands for ASSITANT language teacher

But 2 things. 1) assitants fucking DO THINGS

2) the way they sell this job is like youre a teacher.

Constantly in this job i am treated like a clown.

And im gonna tag this and im probably gonna receive the same comments i get irl from rose tinted glassed ‘japanese people can do no wrong’ people

Thus far ive worked in 4 junior highs and 3 elementarys

Most of the teachers no matter where they are just seem so incompetent

Its no big deal that the teachers arent fluent in english - isnt that literally why alts are here??? So why don’t they ever take advice?!???

Im so fucking sick of being told how to speak my fucking language.

And not the ‘speak slower’ ‘speak simpler’ thats fine and ill accept criticism on my ability to communicate to people learning english as a second language. Not that.

Grammar, pronunciation, sentence structure - and what sounds natural

I hate the videos that are made for classrooms. And the fucking books

“A native speaker wrote it” - k no. Having worked here i know exactly how that went down. A japanese person wrote it, then went to either a business kiss ass ‘japan can do no wrong’ person. Or. Bullied someone into saying it was good by doing that annoying ass thing japanese people do

Where they ask the question over and over with “ok?” At the end. Cause they dont want an answer - they just wanna be told that theyre right or to do whatever they want. And they do not plan on receiving any answer besides “youre correct”

Its awkward cause ive literally been annoyed at my friend in the past for complaining about having a job where she does nothing and gets paid. Now i feel bad because i HATE going to work to sit and do nothing. But honestly - it has more to do with the fact that of all of my schools - only 1 has given me a nice place to sit.

Not a table that they store junk on and pretend to be surprised by me everytime im there like “oops sorry theres all this stuff (but like youre not a real person and we hate that youre here so just be happy we tolerate your existance and tell is your happy to have giant things all over your desk literally sticking in your face)”

Not the extra desk behind the printer that blows dust in my face as it goes off every 20 seconds

Not the desk under the aircon blowing on me/ in the corner next to the coldest window/door

Not a literal broken chair

Not a desk in the path of the class files where teachers have to constantly get to the spot directly behind me

And i was also that person thatd say ‘well if you dont like it - quit - theres plenty of people who WANT that job’

But like it fucking sucks. Cause i have experienced REALLY good teachers who actually team teach with you. I have had one school where i worked full time and got to see my students more than once a month - hence being able to actually get to know them and want them get better. I have been at a school with wonderful staff who welcome me into the school like im an actual person - not like ‘oh is today already the day we let the rat in the school to make the children smile again. Ugh.’

It fucking sucks. I linger on the hope of being able to work at a good school with good teachers full time

I cant find a better job because im a ‘beginner’ and corona

And im stuck getting treated like shit

I AM NOT a kiss ass. Never have been. It kills me to have to work with people who dont want me around

Most of the teachers i work with ARE NEVER PREPARED like wtf why??? Why dont you EVER plan ahead??? When im not prepared its because i have to wait to get instruction from you - you get to chose what you do

And they do basically nothing (not all like ive said ive worked with good teachers)

But most just

Read the book OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN. The students memorize the book passages - they have no clue about the context and if you ask them the same exact question but with a different subject like “do you have any shoes” instead of “do you have any bags” theyre lost. The teacher can get them to answer by saying the exact phrase from the book - but they dont know what theyre saying or how theyre actually answering. They just have it memorized

Then some teachers will have “conversation practice” where they take those exact sentences out if the book - put them together to form an awkward ‘conversation’ and then the students just read it.

Ooohhh look at them. Having a conversation!

Play fucking bingo.... why? They dont even make the students repeat the words for pronunciation practice - why the fuck do you play bingo everyday

Sing songs. UGHHHHH yea that could be fun if these 60 year old teachers would stop forcing shit from the 1940s on the teenage students. I cant decide if music too old for 30 year olds is worse or teachers who take japanese songs that have been translated into english is - lol you fucking hate english so much you cant find ONE english song to sing??? WHY are you teaching english?! - god forbid you let the students choose

Teachers who just give the students the day date and weather....??????????? Cool. Youve managed to ensure they cant come up with the simplest of fucking English questions on their own. Do you carry around those cards to look like you do a lot at your job when you dont? Oh yea probably

Because being in a school watching teachers is the way i learned that japan values looking busy over being productive. If you look stressed and busy all day - you are better than a person who got shit done but looked relaxed.

Why do you use the recordings when i am in the class?????????????????????????????????? THATS LITERALLY THE ONLY REASON YOU APPARENTLY HAVE ME THERE

K and like i said. I have worked with good teachers. In their classes the students are better at english (hur hur funny how that works) those teachers encourage the students to talk with me. Those teachers let the students try to come up with answers and questions on their own. Those students try and ask the teacher when they dont know how to say something to help with translation.

The shit teachers on the other hand - will jump in and stop a student who looks excited to try and trying to figure out how to say something. What does this teach them? Dont try. Just stay silent - the japanese teacher will just talk in japanese again soon - no need to try.

Jumping off that. Students who are good at english or go to juku - will dumb themselves down in classes with shitty teachers. Theyve learned its not good to know more or even nearly as much english as the teacher - pretend you dont understand. Pretends you don’t know how to say things - itll make my stupid teacher feel good. So. If i try to talk or do anything in those classes, even the students who understand will stop trying.

Speaking of just going back to japanese. WHY IS MOST OF ENGLISH CLASS IN JAPNESE???? Most of the teahers will jump at ANY chance to switch back over into japanese. English is just sprinkled into the class. Then they pretend to wonder why the students dont try and why theyre bad at english

And things ive been told in the last year

Dont ever be upset about anything ever

Lol yea just that for one

K but dont ever be upset about teachers doing ANYTHING because theyre just so GOSH DARN BUSYYYYYYYYY

Lol like intially i thought that was why ASSISTANT was in my title. I THOUGHT we were supposed to make them less busy by helping out with planning and grading and blah blah

Nope cause

‘Oh offer to help them! BUT dont be upset when they decline because theyd have to explain to you ANYTHING and.....’

So. Im a child?! I cant be trusted to do anything without proper instruction

Well yea exactly cause

“Oh! Hes probably your babysister haha! Japanese people are so nice! They usually have one teacher look out for you and help you with stuff - besides the head teacher- lol theyre kinda like your babysitter!<3”

K. So like. I need a bachelors degree for this job. Let me say again I NEEDED A COLLEGE DEGREE FOR THIS JOB. i had to move ACCROSS THE WORLD by myself. I have to ge able to fill out federal documents and find a house and pay my bills and follow foregn laws and figure out my way in a foregn country - but i need a BABYSITTER at work?!?!?!?? If im a minute late ill be docked an hours pay. If i do ANYTHING that slightly upsets ANYONE and japanese ppl are offended by EVERYTHING - i am liable for all reprucussions. But. I need a BABYSITTER.

Cant be trusted to be in a class alone (dont be offended its because your not a certified teacher) that would make sense except that YALL THROW ALTS IN WITH THE SPECIAL NEEDS STUDENTS ALL THE TIME - thats supposed to be an EXTRA certification on top of teaching. but Im too fucking stupid and untrustable to do anything with regular students alone, but because you dont like dealing with spefial needs - i can teach them alone.

You dont actually read their hw or check for correctness and most of their tests are just for fun it seems - but i cant be trusted to grade those either

You do the exact same lesson everyday and i only see each class once a month - but dont let me create any activity or lesson for them. Also dont tell me your plans until class is starting and then change it throughout the class and act surprised when idk what the fuck youre doing because you changed your mind while talking at them in japanese

Speaking of changing. I hate teachers who constantly change how they do shit. And again. Get annoyed at me when i cant follow their flow. Do i say hello first or do you? Are we even saying hello today? Am i asking how they are or are you? Are we letting them answer? Are we answering? Whose asking the day date and weather? Are we asking them for the day date and weather?? Whose saying goodbye? Are we saying goodbye? Which bingo version have you chosen today? Are they repeating the words? Yes? No? Am i saying each one twice? Do i have to spell out the fucking word today? Fast? Slow? What hell are you putting me through today

And when they ask me to take charge of an activity. But then change their mind. But then no no you go ahead please take charge. K no just kidding ill tell you and them what to do. Actually no you can keep going please be in control. K no too much english i wanna hear more japanese ill be in control - hey everyone thank the alt for doing that activity with you (me and the students look at each other visibly confused)

These teachers will ask me a question and no matter how i answer its wrong. I always answer shortly initially because... of course. But theyll tell me to GO ON!!! theyll keep doing that. So ill start answering questions with substance - then theyll cut me off - so i go back to answering shortly but NO! CONTINUE!!! im constantly caught confused exactly what they want me to say and now i barely ever tell stories to the students. I stare at the jte the whole time trying to guage by their face if i should keep talking or make it short. Its also awkward cause sometimes they jump in to translate and other times they want me to just keep talking in english with no translation. Regardless whatever way i choose is never correct and they always look at me like im an idiot

Yesterday a teacher did one of the things inhate that prompted this I WANNA WRITE ABOUT HOW MUCH I HATE THIS JOB

Hes a sub. Hes supposed to do the same lessson as the other teachers. He is NEVER prepared. And he does everything bad. So when he didnt have the stuff for the activity he said he wants the students to have conversations with me. GREAT! thats what im here for! Lets do it. So then he shows them videos he has of other students talking with an alt at another school for 5 minutes. Um.... k. Then we open the book to a page of 3 example convo starters. Except. Japanese teachers dont seem to understand that the book is meant to be EXAMPLES. he says ah like this but maybe change. Good ok! I think were on the right track. Lets read these examples and get to it. Nope. He has them have the example sentences with their partner saying its good practice.

No. Its not. Theyre just reading the book and then when they finish saying

“Do you know any good restaurants around here?”

“Yes i do! Theres a curry place over there”

“oh i love curry!”

Theyre not gonna make up more at the ......

Theyre just gonna talk in japanese about other shit.

Then he says ok lets have conversations. Finally

Nope.

He has the class repeat after him together as a unit to me “do you know any good restaurants around here?”

GFFEIWBAKDHWNDGDIEBS RAGEEEE

I said ive had convos in class before may i try like before

He feigns confusion

I ask a student “what kind of food do you like?”

She says sushi

“What kind of sushi”

The students in this class were excitable and chimed in each time.

This time (as usual because they dont know the fish names in english) She begins talking with the kids around her trying to figure out what the english word is for the sushi she likes

But the teacher jumps in and shuts it all down

Because the students are just way too shy to talk in front of the class. Their english is too bad. They cant.

Its extra aggrivating because the teachers at this school range from good to decent - except him. That was a second year class. The last time i was at this school the first years had a introduction 1 on 1 test - with me. And i was to ask them a question at the end. With the other 3 teachers when i asked the question if they didnt understand. I would try saying it in another way. If they still didnt understand - i would answer my question as an example. If they still didnt understand i would give them answers like

“What tv do you like” “do you like anime?” Wait for yes or no “do you like youtube” wait for yes or no (and so on)

If they still didnt understand (very few got here) the japnese teacher would translate the question)

And. If they still didnt understand. We would give them an answer and coax them into repeating after us.

If they didnt. Then they didnt get the point for answering the question.

This teacher. Him being the 4th teacher to do this test with me. Would IMMEDIATELY translate the question if the student didnt answer quickly after me asking it once and then talk to them in japanese and tell me their answer or make one up to me with something like “oh ahah they dont know when yet. So he doesnt know. Maybe he ate breakfast before school!” And then would shoo the student away and call in the next.

^^^ and this is how most teachers are

They sit during class. They play unrelated videos. They spend half the class acting like theyre too confused about their plan to even teach the class (but if i try to do ANYTHING like talk to a student while they sit in front of the class rummaging through their folder going “うーん」 「じゃ」「じゃあー」「そして」「それから」「えーとー」 theyll instruct SOMETHING or play some recording over and over) have i mentioned how they never seem to want to talk in english or listen to students talk in english in english class?? Most of the time theyre just having aside conversations about nonsense in japanese. They read everything themselves despite me being there - in a way where they really just wannt hear themselves talk in english.

Just in general. I hate when teachers talk about me in front of me and dont tell me what the fuck theyre saying. And it’s annoying when students ask them stuff in japanese about me and then the students look at me waiting for me to respond/the teacher to translate their question- but the jte doesnt translate. Or they ask a question that im not in charge of the answer for so even though i understood the question they asked the jte i cant answer them because its not my decision and the jte doesnt wanna look like the asshole that gives them an answer they dont like so they just dont respond so that i look like the dick whose ignoring the students

They do this with regular questions too. Sometimes i hear the whole question and understand. So when the students look to me and the jte goes silent - i answer - then the jte gets all out of sorts because 1) they wanted me to look like an asshole who doesnt wanna talk to the students 2) they deemed the questions not important and didnt want it answered 3)ew! The alt knows more japanese than i thought and she knows what im doing and thats a little embarrassing also what else have i said in front of her today that she might have understand - awkward 4) oh no if students know she understands some japanese they might ask her stuff and i wont be the only means of the alt and students communicating 5) that awk silence just showed the students that i didnt plan to translate something to her and i wanted to blame her and say she doesnt wanna answer that but now i was made a liar of

These arent personal queations btw. For example a student asked why does the guy in one peice eat a lollypop in the america version instead of smoke a cigarette?

This is an incomplete liste. Just. Honestly being an ALT is draining.

I feel like im at a restaurant again just waisting my life away waiting tables.

I actually really like english so being forced to listen to people who are supposed to teach it - purposely teach it wrong and force me to use it incorrectly hurts

I hate watching people suck at their jobs....and be rewarded for sucking at their job

I hate feeling like an outsider in my workplace.

I wanna feel like a real teacher.... not a clown

I hate doing something where nothing i say, do, or feel matters.

That last one. I hate that i can be treated like shit in my workplace AND get in trouble for not thanking people FOR treating me like shit. Not just take it. Take it with a smile!!!

I try to focus on the good things... but its just so damn hard cause ther far and few between and honestly i just wanna feel like im actually an educator to my students and like i can actually be a teacher with the ones who like me and come talk to me and stuff. But its not like i have have a teacher student relationship with them - i cant be part of their school activities. I cant go to their school events. I wont be at the school with them for more than a year.

Even at good schools when the teachers like that you talk with the students - i always feel this vibe of ‘keep it superficial’ dont become an adult they would trust. Its like you can feel them watching - ready to jump in when they think the student should stop petting the stray before they get fleas

I have a lot of teachers i remember fondly. Who id talk to when i saw them even when i didnt have their class anymore. Id tell kids in grades below me that they were lucky if they got them. When i hear about things happening at the school after i leave im happy to hear they got something good. Teachers who helped me understand something better or were just nice to the obvious loser in the class or made me laugh

I wanna be one of them....

Not the police man that came into school a couple times. Or the guy with the birds. Or the nice lunch lady who let you take food when you didnt have money and pay it back the next day.

I wanna be a teacher with a name.

Or at least. Do one of the only things im actually good at

So this job is unfulfilling

[fmlfpl]

Lineup Lamentations - GW10

Our Transfers, Captains, and Starting 11s for the week!

FRIDAY DEADLINE!!!

And if you missed it for subscribers Friday (Thursday) My Life episode came out yesterday !

—

WALSH

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Otamendi and Saka

IN: Kelly and Hudson-Odoi

After talking myself around in circles on the My Life pod yesterday I decided to return from whence I came going with my initial feels for transfers.

Otamendi is obviously diabolical and is not a man to be trusted as if he ever was. Schtoneyboy off the bench as first CB sub this weekend was telling for me, and even with Rodri ded for a bit it leaves us no more sure of the CB situation there than we had before.

Saka is a good lad and he seems like a really nice human bean but after blanking for fun I am discarding him like a used something or other.

In comes one of my all time favorites Martin Kelly and new little baby child CHO.

Kelly I think might just have the CB job from now on next to Mom as first choice pairing - he's actually been good this year somehow. I also don't really need him/the spot at all for the near term. Seemed like the best least painful way to pry some money out of the couch cushions and make a significant upgrade in the xi all the while.

CHO seems like just a good pick at 6m. Couldn't find the final ball against Ayax midweek but he's got a lot about him and he seems like he could be a good long term pick. I am worried about him starting this weekend after rattling off back to back 90s, but if I did something more passive and waited I would have been priced out. Getting him ahead of Turf Moor also feels a bit poopy, but again, keeping my eye on the long term like I have been doing his season with transfers so far and it's been feeling good to me.

GK:

Pope (CHE)

Pope in a bad fixture even tho they've been great at home so far.

Not expecting much here...and if I'm honest 3 cleans through 9 is about the minimum of what I would have expected out of them to date. I'll take it...but I'm not thrilled about it.

DEF:

Alexander-Arnold & Robertson (TOT)

Trent and Robbo remain like the faithful servants they are.

Tough fixture against the potatoheads on Sunday but the OOP boys can always pop up with points any given weekend.

Love them and one of my greatest successes this season has been to hold both from GW1. With Alisson back I suspect everyone will be trying to get both in very soon with their fixtures turning.

Lundstram (whu)

Pointstram gets in there as my third lad. Fucking legend god Lundcuck just such a good guy. Pretty unreal how he's been going this season so far. And they said we wouldn't have a 1b in the game this season.

MID:

Salah (TOT) and Sterling and De Bruyne (AVL)

Mo Raz and Kevin the three amigos go again. Not much to say about dem boyz. Good picks solid pillars in my squad straight down the spine.

City team sheet always a bit of a mindfuck but meh. Can't drop points in the league so hoping for actual first choice even though I'm sure we'll get Bilv Jezuz Mahrez up top. Life.

As shouted a lot on the My Life pod Mo could be in for a big weekend. He's never been more of a diff than he is right now so a haul would be most welcome. Go on Mo.

Hudson-Odoi and Mount (bur)

Rounding out the midfield is new friend CHO and his possible actual IRL friend Mount. Couple Chelsea guys in mid feels great.

Have had Mount for a bit and adding CHO oozes value to me. Buying players who are priced like they are on a 14th place team but they are covert on the 3rd best team with the 3rd best attack in the league seems good.

Again, not expecting a ton this weekend but looking at the medium term points should flow.

FWD:

Pukki (MUN)

Still holding / clinging to Pukki. Was close to going down to Neil who I do love immensely but it just didn't seem like a great use of the transfer. I still believe in Pukki and I think he's just a quality guy.

Four blanks on the bounce have been a tough pill to swallow no doubt but I still think he'll get points. Stats have been down compared to the opening few games when he was on fire, but his stats aren't horrible by any stretch. Anyway, I'm holding him. Fucking come on you Finn fuck.

Abraham (bur)

Treble on Chelsea attack with Tammy is the last piece of my puzzle.

Up against two really bad shitty CBs this weekend I actually think Tam could do some things. Feel like his movement will be too much for them to deal with it will just come down to if he is able to finish.

CAP:

Sterling (AVL)

I just couldn't keep the sadist in me quiet and I've done the thing of end of week cap twist onto Raz.

I did that gut check - if Raz fired this weekend and I had cap on Kev I would be completely despondent and probably would be crying actual tears. I don't want that. If Kevin fires and I have cap Raz I wouldn't feel the same things. Emotional and pain management in...

If that isn't the right way to pick cap and guide me then I don't know what is. I did genuinely spend a couple of hours contemplating Mo for cap but in the end it just seemed too insane. That's that. Raz you fuckboi score some goals this weekend you owe me.

—

ALON

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Cantwell

IN: Hudson-Odoi

I had to listen back to wtf we talked about on Friday My Life episode because I legitimately couldn’t remember what conclusion we came to regarding my moves... The temptation to take a hit for a triple move of Aubz/Gunn/Cantwell out is soooo fucking real but it is probably better to just hold my horses one more week and go into next week with two frees while fixing a big problem in my fourth mid slot.

Enter CHO who could sneaky just be a really great assist/BAP machine guy.

Floating the other transfer to deal with probably Gunn and Aubz next week.

Just hoping CHO starts this weekend...

GK:

Gunn (LEI)

This just makes me sad.

Leicester don’t even shoot in bulk so there’s not even that save-point potential in this. It’s just gonna be another 0-2 pointer as per usual.

DEF:

Just noticing now that all my defenders are away this week which I fucking hate and is really bad.

Lundstram (whu)

Lundy is such a good boy. This fixture isn’t terrific but it’s cleanable and SHU have been a well drilled and well coached tight ship you gotta just back’em.

Tomori (bur)

Chelsea I do not expect to keep a clean here with Burnley now just good at attacking. Feel like this could be a high-scoring one if Tammy/Wood finish their chances.

Rudiger back soon and hopefully Kante back soon will make this team much tighter.

Söyüncü (sou)

I feel worried about Leicester defense...

They were reeeally tight and putting up fantastic numbers when they were in their conservative shell formation but I’m worried that Brodge is not getting the balance right in the “more open and attacking” formations and styles that they’re playing now in the good fixtures...

It’s a delicate balance to go from extreme to extreme and honestly it might not be possible (and maybe that’s why none of the top managers in the world really do that).

We’ll see.

MID:

Salah (TOT)

He’s gonna shred these.

Sterling and De Bruyne (AVL)

They’re gonna shred these.

Hudson-Odoi (bur)

Mainly just praying he starts and then take it from there... This is the type of match where he’ll need to be the main creator mainly by taking people on constantly maybe drawing PEN15s and everything. Gonna be great come on Frank don’t fuck around get the boy in there.

FWD:

Aubameyang (CRY)

Ugh. Fucking ugh. Back to back seasons I trust Gilligan on his nightmare Arsenal Island and he fucks me.

I’m expecting maybe 2 shots and another blank? Anything better then that is just a cherry on top. Won’t even be happy if he hauls I honestly will not.

Abraham (bur)

Tammy is excellent. Keep it up Tamela.

Pukki (MUN)

This is a disaster? Or this is fine dog in the house on fire? Or this is actually fine and Pukki is just good going through a dry spell? Don’t know. The returns are always darkest before the dongs as they say.

CAP:

Sterling (AVL)

Sticking with my initial read and gut of the situation when I put the armband on him on like Sunday.

Villa love conceding chances from the right, Fred Gilbert can’t defend, I’m just rolling with the player in crazy red-hot form and looking extremely good on eye-test too.

It seems good to do when all of the things that we look for all line up to just not overthink it and go for it. Fuck it. Come on Raz.

—

RANDOM SLACKER OF THE WEEK: DESERTBUG

The words of Random Slacker are not officially endorsed by this website nor any employees of FML FPL LLC.

TRANSFERS:

OUT: N/A

IN: N/A

Perfectly fine week to do this sneak preview thing because it's early in the season and the other Slackers who are in my minileague (three of them) are either likely to miss out on an early Friday deadline or they've been so absent from Slack lately that they won't even notice I did this.

Anyway, I don't care if they know what I'm doing this week because I'm not doing anything.  The team is in decent shape to roll out eleven this week in an old-school 4-4-2 as I had already ripped the Bandaid off of the lesions named Otamendi, Puke-y and Haller who had been in my team.

They've all been shipped off to Gunga Galunga Land over the prior weeks and I'm a happier lad for having done it.  I've still got qualms over Little Toddy Cantwell and a few other niggly little issues, but I'm in a good spot to sit tight and get more info from another week's worth of EPL action.

GK:

Pope (CHE)

The Bishop of Rome, Vicar of Jesus Christ, Successor of the Prince of the Apostles, Supreme Pontiff of the Universal Church, Primate of Italy, Archbishop and Metropolitan of the Roman Province, Sovereign of the Vatican City State and Servant of the servants of God (or so Wikipedia says) gets to go this week and every week, because his backup plays for Swansea City.

With that many names, it seems like the whole lot of them should clog up the goalmouth and keep clean against Chelsea, or at least so I can hope.  Saves points at least?

DEF:

Alexander-Arnold (TOT)

Here's hoping that Trento recovers from his Ebola or whatever kind of virus he got yellow-flagged over.  Would be really nice if these clubs could get their players to mix in a little bit of hand-washing in their daily routines.  Could see some nice points from the lad if Spurs' recent ineptitudes continue.

Tomori (bur)

Auto-start given my other options, and could be a dud, because Burnley has managed their way into a goal or more in eight of their first nine matches (only Pool has kept them out so far), but that kind of worm-eating magic has to come to an end sometime.

Soyuncu (sot)

Umlaut-master goes in another match that doesn't exactly feel great, as Soton has only been kept out once this season, but Foxes are good and maybe this will be the GW that he puts his giant cranium on a floater and buries it for me.

Lundstram (whu)

Yup, another road start from my defenders, which feels bad, cuz Hammers could totally put it together at any time and leave me with a one-pointer, or they could continue to disappoint and Points-Lord Lundy of Stram could produce the goods again.

Definitely worth rolling the dice and I don't really have any other good options so there you go.  I'm certainly not going to put Fred Guilbert from Iowa into the lineup for his match at City.

MID:

Salah (TOT), Sterling and DeBruyne (AVL)

This has got to be the week that this trio of big hitters starts hitting big with their big whatevers.  RIght?  RIght?

Yeah, Pep-Roulette can always strike but whatever, I'm not gonna lose even a moment of time worrying about it.  Time to "Laissez les bons temps rouler", as they say down in the Big Easy.  Beignets and coffee would be an awesome accompaniment to the 0430 wake-up I'll have for the City match, but I doubt anybody is going to be fetching them for me.  Pout.

Mount (bur)

Picks himself, given my options, but if anybody's going to mess up my keeper clean, let it be Fat Frank's chosen one.

FWD:

Aubameyang (CRY)

Everybody agonizing over him because they brought him in just in time for his two blanks, but I'm just going to focus on his 39 goals and 9 assists in 58 EPL matches, his 9 goals in 14 Europa matches as a Gooner, (57 returns in 72 matches overall, btw), and his prior 112 returns in 127 matches with Dortmund and remember that he's just an absolute top-drawer striker.

Bring on the AubameDancing!

Ayew (ars)

Brother of Andre gets the nod in my eleventh slot because Arse gonna Arse, and they've conceded in seven of nine matches so far.

I like his chances of doing something better than the probable three point ceiling that I would get from trotting Todd out there against a desperate United side that has a quality defense.

CAP:

DeBruyne (AVL)

Yup, I saw RazzyMan put three past the Atalantans on Tuesday with assists on the other two Citeh goals, and that would be a cap haul of 26x2=52 if he did that in an EPL outing, but my nickel says he doesn't do that in back-to-back outings and I like a Kev who should have hauled last week and who only went 60 minutes in that Champs League match midweek.

C'mon Kev, do this for me!  Lead the lads to a century score!  The FPL drought of GW8-9 has to come to an end at some point, right?

[barblebapkins]

99 to 1 boi les'go

okay FINE ILL DO IT BACKWARDS99: Do you miss anyone right now? miss anyone in particular?? no, but i do wish i was with someone rn98: Whats your favorite color? green97: Do you want kids? idk? maybe?96: Do you have kids? no95: Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way? no?? like who over the age of 6 does that94: Who was your HS crush? haha that stays in the vault!93: If married, how long have you been married? not married! yet!92: Do you want to get married? yes hehehahehehea91: Best room for a fireplace? the living room of course90: Can you knit or crochet? nope!89: Which are better black or green olives? i dont like olives in general88: Ever have plastic surgery? nope and doubt i ever will87: Ever won a contest? nothing worth remembering86: DJ or band, at a wedding? probably DJ85: Are you patient? depends, with people i think i have a lot of patience, but with other things i can lose my temper kinda quickly84: Can you hold your breath without holding your nose? nope, i panic83: Can you swim well? not well at all82: Sugar or snickerdoodles? sugar81: Tea or coffee? tea80: Hot tea or cold tea? i prefer cold tea, though i havent tried much hot tea. i feel like i’d prefer hot honestly79: What was the last concert you saw? none! that aint my style78: Who would you like to see in concert? see above77: Ever been in love? yes! i am right now!76: Regularly burn incense? nope75: Own a record player? im not THAT old74: Own any record albums? NOT THAT OLD!!73: Have you ever cried because you were so happy? yes heaehe72: Ever won a spelling bee? no, i probably could have though71: Can you curl your tongue? yea70: Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing? dhedhehde shes currently in graphic design but she can do whatever she wants!69: Ever take dance lessons? nope! i cant dance to save my life and im fine with that!68: Ever hear of the group Tres Bien? no?? i feel like someone else put this here67: Peanuts or Sunflower seeds? not a fan of either but probably sunflower seeds if i had to pick, cos i HATE peanuts66: Cheetos Or Fritos? cheetos without a doubt65: Nike or Adidas? nike64: Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart? target. walmart is always a disaster every time i’m there, and kmart, while a nostalgic liminal space, is an awful shopping experience too63: First concert? already answered this twice haha62: What do you wear to bed? t-shirt and shorts, or just shorts, depending on how cold/hot it is61: Wear a bath robe? nope, i just wear my towel until im ready to get dressed60: Wear slippers? i own a pair but i dont really use em59: Take a vitamin daily? no but i wish i did58: Ever have a Deja-vu feeling? all the time, like something specific will happen irl and ill feel like i envisioned this exact moment YEARS ago57: Do you believe in ghosts? yeah, i’ve had more than one weird experience that i cant explain any other way56: Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid? i kinda wanted to be a chef until i realized i cant cook for SHIT55: Favorite type of fruit pie? probably cherry54: Ever eat a pierogi? yes and it WASNT GOOD53: Is Christmas stressful? now that i actually buy stuff for everyone yes it is52: Do you think musicals are cheesy? not really, i still have a bit of a soft spot for les mis51: Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer? in school probably50: Ever used a gun? yes, and i didn’t like it.49: Do you dance in the car? i am the most introverted person in the world, you’re lucky if you can even get me INTO a car48: Do you sing in the shower? no but i hum sometimes47: Do you sing in the car? nope46: Are you afraid of heights? deathly yes. if i even look UP at like a skyscraper i get nauseous45: Ever watch soap operas? not willingly44: Who is better…Leno or Letterman? i dont really watch late night stuff but ive heard letterman is a bit of a dick43: Are you stubborn? i can be with some things42: Which are better legos or lincoln logs? what the FUCK is a lincoln log41: Do you have any magazine subscriptions? my brother keeps renewing my gamestop subscription so i keep getting gameinformer magazines and i want it to STOP40: Are you horny? no39: What is your Chinese astrological sign? dog bork bork38: When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween? i honestly dont remember?? like i think back on it but cant visualize any of it37: Are you lazy? haha YES36: What is your usual bedtime? whenever i WANT it to be leave me alone35: Best thing to eat for breakfast? sadness34: Favorite kind of sandwich? i rly like cold italian subs33: Ever ran out of gas? i dont rly drive so no32: Ever gotten a speeding ticket? see ^31: Can you change the oil on a car? no lmao30: When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper? youre livin in the past grandpa, these days we project our brainwaves directly into other peoples heads from across the globe!29: Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine? AAHH what the fuck no28: Were you ever a boy/girl scout? for a little while but circumstances made me have to leave27: Last person you kissed/kissed you? haha hasnt happened!26: What movies could you watch over and over and still love? my favorite movie ever is probably Up25: What is your favorite food? grilled shrimp pls GIVE24: What do you dip a chicken nugget in? bbq sauce mm23: If you’re a girl, bra size? If you’re a guy, pants size? 30 x 2922: Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some? haha nice TRY pirates21: Whats your least favorite movie? cant think of any off the top of my head but im sure ill think of one later20: Do you still watch cartoons? i admittedly still keep up to date on steven universe and cant wait for the next episodes19: Is it okay for guys to wear pink? of course!18: What is your Song of the week? sweats17: What size is your bed? i dont know and im too lazy to check, but its TOO SMALL16: How many people have you slept with this week? none, and i wouldnt ever just sleep with someone but thanks for asking i guess!!15: Do you chew your pens and pencils? yes if im nervous14: Do you ever dance even if theres no music playing? i dont dance13: What about pooped in the woods? ew WHAT12: Have you ever peed in the woods? only cos we were camping and it was like 2 am11: Do you ever count your steps when you walk? sometimes actually yeah, not for any good reason though10: What is your biggest pet peeve? nothing gets on my nerves more than dishonesty and/or uncalled for disrespect9: Do you always smile for pictures? no cos i have a BAD smile8: Do you have freckles? no but i have a lot of birthmarks7: Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees? you cant outrun a swarm of bees6: Do you cut out coupons but then never use them? no wtf how old do these people think we are5: Do you like to use post-it notes? this is the FUTURE, DUDE!!4: Have you ever stolen a street sign before? what the fuck who does that3: Do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out? out, but not usually on purpose cos my sheets are very loose2: Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel? no1: Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed? i dont have closets only dressers, soo

[chrisevansbulge]

Ask Game

rules: you must answer these 85 statements and tag 20 people

tagged by @goldmoonsilverstars​

tagging: @all-the-super-feels​ @gendervoidkillua​ and literally anyone else, (but especially if i know you irl because i want to see what you said and i literally only remember these two because we’ve messaged semi recently and i do not talk 2 anyone) 

the last:

1. drink: monster energy drink i had to get up at 11AM, it was rough

2. phone call: some number called me earlier but i was trying 2 sleep so i ignored it

3. text message: khatlyn telling me she was here

4. song you listened to: like the way

5. time you cried: tODAY IN THE CAR BCUZ KHATLYN WAS TELLN ME ABOUT THIS SAD AF DOG MOVIE WTF

have you ever:

6. dated someone twice: lol yeah but i was young and dumb now im old and still dumb

7. kissed someone and regretted it: yeah but w/e

8. been cheated on: kind of? the details are spotty and lost in time

9. lost someone special: :)

10. been depressed: lmao m8

11. gotten drunk and thrown up: yep, s/times you just gotta

3 favorite colors:

12. space?

13. pastels

14. sunset?

in the last year have you:

15. made new friends: yeah i make a lot

16. fallen out of love: kind of i guess

17. laughed until you cried: absolutly

18. found out someone was talking about you: bitches be snitches (knife emoji)

19. met someone who changed you: i sure did

20. found out who your friends are: like im going to be put to the test in some epic adventure and find out who is a true friend/warrior????

21. kissed someone on your Facebook list: the question is how many

general:

22. how many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: all???

23. do you have any pets: two cats that hate me so much, like im just tryin to be their friends and they r not having it

24. do you want to change your name: Kat is dope and so is Kathryn??? But i wouldn’t mind changing the last name to something more chill like for example... Evans??? B)

25. what did you do for your last birthday: saw magical beasts bcuz it came out on my birth date

26. what time did you wake up: 11 for some mountain bullshit

27. what were you doing at midnight last night: doing a face mask and getting high in the rain with some scary wasps

28. name something you can’t wait for: to be in a major movie pls

29. when was the last time you saw your mom: like literally a minute ago

31. what are you listening to right now: like the way on repeat what do u want

32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: i work with tom and i hang out with him a whole bunch. kind of a loser. nice guy. likes oklahoma. gullible. 

33. something that is getting on your nerves: the cost of living in LA

34. most visited website: fucking tumblr because i am a loser, but once school starts it will be blackboard

35. hair colour: blue/gray/pink

36. long or short hair: so. damn. long.

39. piercings: my ears. just the two. i wear a fake septum because real ones smell and i just don’t want that

40. blood type: who do i look like? Karl Landsteiner founder of blood types?

41. nicknames: kat ????            

42. relationship status: i am trying my best but s/times people r dumb

43. zodiac: scorpio

44. pronouns: she/her

45. favourite tv show: do u know how many i watch?????? fuck off i don’t have time

46. tattoos: i have one on my arm it’s dope as hell

47. right or left handed: right

48. surgery: i had to have surgery once and i will only tell you about it in person because boy, it’s rough

49. piercing: yes, i got another one since the last time u asked

50. sport: hockey 

51. vacation: anywhere but mostly disney. so much disney.

52. pair of trainers: like the shoes? i am in america i can’t read

more general:

53. eating: yes i do that

54. drinking: what? water? not enough pal, i’ll tell you that

55. i’m about to: watch beauty and the beast and eat chocolate? also text my fav cousin and ask if i can go live in her house for like three days

56. waiting for: someone to appreciate me

57. want: a phone with more storage, if it tells me im running low one more time im going from lowkey mental breakdown to full-blown murder

58. get married: only if i like their first name. the only one i like is chris. and u know what, last name is important to. not because i’m taking it, but because i’m assuming i’ll be getting their mail. evans sounds like a good one.

59. career: when i grow up i want 2 b in movies

which is better:

60. hugs or kisses: physical affection? me? never

61. lips or eyes: depends on what u do with them. i personally only find people who can take their eyes out on demand attractive

62. shorter or taller: i do not give one single damn

63. older or younger: older. don’t want youths trying to get near me 

64. nice arms or nice stomach: aRMS

65. hook up or relationship: depends on the person???? i’m trying to do both rn and only one is going swell B)

66. troublemaker or hesitant: they both have burned me with their wild ways

have you ever:

67. kissed a stranger: maybe idk middle school was nuts

68. drank hard liquor: unfortunately 

69. lost glasses/contact lenses: i have 20/20 vision but i lose so many pairs of sunglasses

70. turned someone down: yes

71. sex on the first date: depends on how big their arms are or if they laugh at my jokes 

72. broken someone’s heart: who tf do i look like 2 you

73. had your heart broken: leave me alone im working on it

74. been arrested: no i have not but i still sweat when someone runs a background check????

75. cried when someone died: life sucks man

76. fallen for a friend: i dont even remember anymore

do you believe in:

77. yourself: i am trying my best 2 b my best :))))))

78. miracles: science we dont get yet

79. love at first sight: A) have u seen any woman ever, B) i have seen a bicep the size of my head and i fell fast and hard

80. santa claus: stay out of my house

81. kiss on the first date: yes! ! !

82. angels: not really at all

other:

83. current best friend’s name: khatlyn. when other people write it you can see the pen ink build where they had to pause to remember how to spell the rest.

84. eye colour: ocean

85. favourite movie: i am a film major so you can shove this question where the sun don’t shine (a butt. shove it up a butt)

[kalicokatty]

ANOTHER ADDITION TO THE DRAW YOUR MUTUAL CHALLENGE!!!

@introspecticskeptic

my only irl friend who i let follow my tumblr

like, jesus, dudes seen my porn and STILL hangs with me, what a trooper

for real though, weve known each other since middle school-that was over 10 years ago

proof mlm and wlw is real and strong

“a gaymer”

loves daddys

is dying of anticipation for dream daddy

got a sugar daddy before me??? dude wtf rude

when he gets interested he focuses entirelly on it and forgets about everything else

has THE WORST LUCK EVER

but is still a really cool and kind friend??? wtf i dont deserve him

i think he was cursed by a witch as a child to have crappy luck, and the only way to break the spell is true daddys kiss

i think hes married to matt mercer

hes super smart and really cool to have conversations with

is actually a talented writer who writes really good fanfiction for mass effect, dragon age, fallout 4, etc.

for reals if phychological studies, drama, and gay domestic fanfic hes your guy

even if its not?? talk to him anyways cuz hes really smart and cool???

also if youre mean to him ill kick ur butt

go check out his tumblr right now!!!!