#there’s a list of reasons I hate the guy but key among them is that he brought dockless eacooters to town

[jethroq]

a great morning to be a hater, a stupid project by a local politician-businessman I hate just filed for bankruptcy

[olderthannetfic]

A lot of these discussions about colonizer romance or slave fantasies or similar just feel like the race version of the way certain feminists keep wringing their hands about rape fantasies and the “problem” of them. Like, sure, there are certainly people in the “privileged” group in question who enjoy those in the more “problematic” way that might speak to something concerning about how they view any real-life partners or sex (“might” being a key word here)… for instance, the slavery isekai anime trend seems to be most popular with gross dudes who really do think having a slave woman who waits on you hand and foot and also has sex with you is desirable and wish they could have that irl. But I think the bigger reason these “problematic” fantasies persist is that a lot of people in the equivalent “marginalized” group also really like it in their own ways. They like eroticizing that experience that is so troubling irl. It’s clear some of the people who like these “colonizer” romances are colonized people just as a lot of women love rape fantasies.

Idk, I don’t think the discussion is as simple as saying that what porn or romance you are into has *zero* effect on your IRL sexuality. I think it’s hard to argue that if you’re getting off to something a lot, it doesn’t impact the rest of your life in at least some way, the brain doesn’t draw firm walls around these things— and there’s just the objective fact every young straight woman I’ve known has observed that a lot of younger straight guys have had their expectations of women and sex warped by the unrealistic stuff they’re seeing in porn. But I think like with any other “how does the media affect us?” question: it’s almost never an exact 1:1. Different media deals with these topics differently, and even the same media can affect different people different ways, or even the same person different ways at different points in their life. That’s the issue with “anti”-style thinking, not that fiction can never affect real life. It’s that it’s never as simple as just making a list of bad things no one can like. One person’s trash is another’s treasure and v.v., and what can be irredeemable hateful garbage to one person can be cathartic to another. Just like how the kinks that your abuser used to justify abusing you can be used by another person as their lifeline to help them enjoy sex again after abuse. Rape fantasies or racial fantasies that may seem objectively bad when framed around how privileged people view them… well, that’s not the only framing (and maybe we should stop centering privileged people all the damn time?)

So like even aside from the fact that “colonizer romance” does not have a single objective definition and that people are putting a wide swath of stuff into that label, and it should be used as the start rather than end of a conversation… are we even sure that everyone is coming at it from the POV of the colonizer? Are more people really viewing themselves as John Smith or as Pocahontas? And so when looked at that way, isn’t it really more another version of the eternally-popular-among-women “I can change/fix him!” narrative? (Which itself can be critiqued, particularly in how often patriarchal media sells that to women and why… but that’s a different conversation from the usual “colonizer romance” conversation.)

Or maybe some people are just inherently drawn to cross-cultural romances in general, and those people also like ones that don’t have a colonizing aspect to them?

Like, there’s a lot to unpack here that isn’t in these conversations. We can’t just make this the new buzzword, thought-terminating cliche.

--

[hellcatinnc]

I'm the Villainess, So I'm Taming the Final Boss Anime Review

Spoilers Included

This is a anime I knew I was gonna love right from the start. The moment you key in on Claude and its like game over, another hot boy. However I will say the first thought of him was he was gonna be more dominate being the Demon Lord however he is more of a blushy boy hidden behind it all. I love that it starts off like some of the other anime's where the prince pushes the girl out and wants someone else it gave me that 7th time loop vibe there. Although Aileen is no Rishe she is a pretty gutsy likeable character. What did amaze me though is they chose this little meek character or you think she is as this innocent girl the prince chooses over Aileen to realize she is a little bitch. I hated her through out the whole show even the prince was more likeable than her. I love you find Claude isn't even a bad guy he was just pushed out of the kingdom and he made his life among the demons. His powers are pretty cool but one of the highlights to me was after the prince threw Aileen out as trash and she came back to help them for Claude's sake and after they are like accusing her and stuff. Claude appears showing her a carriage to ride in as well as bowing to her to see the look on the ones that sent her way was priceless.

So this is one of them anime's I think its worth watching but don't expect it to be hugely memorable. They copy alot of the types from others like I said right off the bat I saw 7th time loop. Now granted I think it was out before that anime but least that anime had all strong characters to pull you in. I mean I love Claude but to me he is the only real reason in months I will remember this anime. Even the way that seems thing like they are falling into place middle way of the anime and you think there could be a happy ending its like they tried to flip it up and play along the lines that he lost his memory and he had to fall in love with her again. However this was interesting it was rushed in the anime. In like 2 episodes he went from not remembering her, to thinking she is crazy to wanting her anyway to being back in love with her. These don't add up on a timeline. Don't get me wrong I know anime's are only a bit of a manga but some either need more episodes to get their point across or another season. This is one of them so please do yourself a favor and read the manga. Its on my list.

As for Claude is a perfect character to me cause I love my blushy boys even when they come off strong and dominant. He fits that perfect and oh lord when he blushes its not as often as I like but when he does *fans self*. I know I'm not mentioning everyone's name and all like the prince, trust me you will understand it these characters just aren't memorable enough and I wanted to reflect on that. Now don't get me wrong when Claude admits the kind of love he carries for Aileen he is that burn the world to the ground character I love. He will stay good and will try to just watch over the demons and all staying out of trouble. However you hurt her and he will destroy the world. You even see this when he starts turning into like this demon creature thing and only Aileen can bring him out of it.

The lil good girl bitch with her magic sword inside her was kinda stupid but was worse was Aileen had one too. It came off redundant in the end and the fact this was supposed to be a anime based off a video game they were in just fell short for me. I think you even lose that a couple episodes in and they never mention it much after that. To me it has so many connections to 7th time loop its unreal however no where near as good. I wish I had wrote this review the day I finished it because I honestly believe in just a weeks time of finishing it, this becomes too forgetful. Yet its not rewatchable for me to go back and watch for a more in depth review. For this I apologize, but I did want people to know its worth watching and I still give it a 4 out of 5 star but that is mostly to deal with Claude and Aileen over anything else. The story line is probably a 3 at best and the rest of it can fall easily at a 2. The visual isn't bad like it was good enough for me to see Claude is a hot boy.

There is this point though that Claude mentions he wants to spoil her, make her cry, and ruin her that I thought I was going to lose my shit in. Somehow that one line pulled me in to his character and made me continue to watch. Luckily its near the beginning but definitely what coasted me through however also what makes you think of a dominant lord type and he falls short to that. I really do love how he looks at Aileen though like she is the most precious thing he has ever seen even when he tries to come off more evil. I love the devotion of the demons when he is gone they go after the so called good guys. It really is flipped you will find yourself rooting for the dark side thats supposed to be bad. I do find the bad guy so to say in this is annoying she is all the way through I mean look at her smug face you can tell she is going to be annoying the moment you see her.

The friendship you see with Claude and his two right handed guys was a bit sweet but the betrayal really wasn't even needed like it didn't have much of a punch to the story line and felt like it was pushed more than believable to me. The point of them making that Claude the only way he can marry Aileen is taking the proper place on the throne it makes her father look like a gold digger and that he don't give a damn about his daughters happiness. Even at one point where they dressed her up as a boy just to fit her in to spy on Claude again very over used. This anime really is a cliché in so many things but I will leave it there give it a go and hope you enjoy it.

Check out the trailer though and be your own judge.

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

I saw this list when it first went up a while ago, thought it was incredibly fucking weird, meant to make a post about that, but then got distracted and forgot to do so. I was reminded of it yesterday, when Mark Watson referenced it in his show, because of course he did. Of course it took Mark Watson under five minutes to bring up 1) the fact that the was on a list of the 50 greatest comedians of the 21st Century, and 2) the fact that he was only number 50 on the list and he's worried about all the people ranked ahead of him. And, he said, three of the people above him are shit.

To be honest, that's generous. I mean, I realize he was sort of joking, but still, there are definitely more than three shit comedians on that list. And just overall, it's fucking weird. These lists are always weird, you can't rank anything as subjective as comedy, and they never perfectly reflect who's actually most talented at the craft. But still, even by the standards of weird bullshit lists, this one is really weird.

First of all, it’s weird that they called it a list of the greatest stand-up comedians of the 21st Century, instead of specifying British comedians, or comedians who've done most of their work in Britain, given that that's almost the entire list. I hate things that are America-centric, and even I have to admit that there are definitely more Americans than that among the 50 funniest comedians worldwide of the last 23 years.

Having said that, Inside was brilliant, a lot of his older songs are also very funny, but Bo Burham is not the funniest comedian in the world. Tim Key is very funny, but... third best? In the entire world? I fucking love Mae Martin, but... are there really only five people in the whole entire world who are funnier than them? They're above Billy Connolly and Eddie Izzard?

Nina Conti at 13 is just a massive insult to #14-50 and everyone not on the list. I honestly feel like that must just be the Telegraph writer fucking with people. I'm funnier than Nina Conti. My only thought is you could sort of blame it on them being a Tory paper - ventriloquism is fairly old school, maybe they like that? But Frankie Boyle's higher than her. Nish Kumar's on the list. This specific list isn't that pro-Tory.

I find Lara Ricote very funny, she won the Edinburgh Newcomer award last year and while I haven't heard the show I'm guessing it was deserved based on other stuff I've heard her do. But there's a massive leap between "best new comedian at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival in 2022" and "30th best comedian in the world". Also, if they're trying to include 2022 Edinburgh winners to show that the new comedians are also good, it's weird that they left off Sam Campbell, who won the actual award (the thing that is no longer Perrier). He's funnier than quite a few people on that list.

Also, no Jimmy Carr. I don't think Jimmy Carr is among the 50 funniest comedians in the world. But he is objectively a big deal. Michael McIntyre is on the list, and I refuse to believe the person who wrote this list genuinely thinks he’s the 27th funniest person in the whole world. They included him because you have to, you can’t ignore a guy that big. You’d think Jimmy Carr would be in the same boat.

On the subject of people I might not put on the list, but should probably be included for similar reasons, not a single Russell. Not a single one of those Russells they have now (on that subject, actually, I do find putting Stewart Lee second kind of funny). Lee Mack's not on the list either, he's played arenas.

Ed Byrne? Not even on the list? I'm not saying he's the funniest comedian in the world and would belong on a perfectly done list, but this means they're saying every person on this list is funnier than Ed Byrne. Mickey Flannigan is not funnier than Ed Byrne.

No John Oliver, host of the biggest satire show in America. I mean, there are giant swathes of extremely successful Americans being left out, but you'd think they might include that one since he's also British. Wrote that paragraph, then remembered it's specifically a list of stand-ups. Leaving the paragraph in with the strikethrough because I think John Oliver's stand-up is extremely underrated and he's very, very good at it and would deserve be included for that. But it's not what he's well known for now.

Kitson is right to make jokes about people waxing poetic about him being the greatest stand-up of his generation. I get that he's tired of hearing that and that it's not that simple. But putting him at 18th, below Nina Conti and Adam Riches, seems like going too far the other way.

What a weird fucking list. I guess that's the point of these things, maybe being intentionally weird to make people talk about it. I guess technically I've just linked to a Tory paper from my blog, which is not a great idea. In my defence, I am not driving a large amount of traffic to it. I'd feel a greater responsibility to avoid that if my blog weren't tiny. And none of this matters. It's just really weird.

[infinitewarden]

Osiris isn’t Savathun.

Great! Now that I have your attention:

Man you guys tire me out about Osiris. If you truly believe this is Osiris I don’t mean to sound like That Guy that’s like “you don’t know what you’re talking about” but... You don’t know what you’re talking about.

So.

Let’s talk about how much Osiris cares about the City and humanity and why the Osiris in Epilogue is not actually Osiris.

Alright. Let’s start off with context. I think it’s super important to see what we do know as Osiris’s views. From my heavy analyses of him since 2020 I can confidently say these are what he views as the most important things a person can do:

Keep promises

Speak their truths

Protect the City & Humanity

Know that the Vex are true Evil.

Now, I won’t be doing a breakdown of each one individually but I will be talking a great deal of how important honesty is to Osiris, the City, and his views of the Vex.

Speaking honestly and bluntly.

I don’t know how many of you were into Destiny before Beyond Light, so if you were unaware of this it’s not your fault. However I’ve seen a very strange change in tone when it comes to how people view Osiris. Before Season of Hunt people hated - and I mean hated - Osiris. Why? Because he was blunt. They viewed his bluntness as rudeness.

To see a sudden switch to him being secretive and scheming is... alarming, to say the least. (And to see people think that this is the norm is also alarming but in other ways.)

The Osiris before Hunt was not secretive and scheming. He sought knowledge openly. He sought, specifically, the truth. I must stress just how open he was about his plans. First I’ll give you a few in lore examples:

I admit, I found your questions divisive and disloyal, and I feared you might be capable of breaking our unity when the City's position had grown so tenuous. Why divert attention away from the Traveler, our only hope? And then it got worse, dabbling in thanatonautics, Ahamkara-lore, chasing after Xur and the tricks of the Nine. Launching expeditions into the Reef and beyond at a time when ships were irreplaceable. Your quest split Guardians along ideological lines. This was your greatest crime: Hunters chose to pursue your visions instead of protecting refugees, Titans assembled teams to chase the legendary Vault of Glass instead of striking the Fallen, and Warlocks turned away from the study of the Traveler in favor of  your  ultimate obsession... learning the exact nature of the Darkness. ... Perhaps what drives a Warlock to madness is truth.

Osiris.

"Do not romanticize this burden. We wield a weapon." The Speaker shakes his head. "The Light wields you, Osiris. You are what you make of it. A glorious extension of its majesty, in many directions." Osiris paces at cadence with his words. "Then it would do well to speak clearly. To better direct me." The Speaker cocks his head. "Without will? Then it would be no better than the Darkness." "I am asking only for guidance; it is a delicate game we are playing." Osiris's voice, distressed. Regal again, the Speaker motions to the stone garden. "Will you sit with me?"

13: Margins Part II.

And, while I don’t particularly like using the Fall of Osiris comic as a source, it does have very important lines on his viewpoints that I find relevant yet.

Fall of Osiris #1.

Hell he was open about his plans to fuck with time itself to bring Saint back.

Sagira narrowed her eye at the rogue Lightbearer and lowered herself to Osiris’s shoulder. “Why’s he here?” she asked quietly. “I asked him to consult on the engineering work,” Osiris replied, crossing his arms. “You sicko,” the other man declared, walking a circle around the Warlock, his eyes darting along every surface of the Sundial around them. ... “Just one more question, then. Why all the fuss?” “I owe him.” “I owe a lotta people, Warlock. You’re opening the gates of hell with a Vex key.” “When the Traveler brought me back, I had no friends. No family—” “No one had anything in the Dark Age.” “But Saint was always there. And I saw him grow from neophyte to demigod.”

The Sundial.

"You haven't left the Forest in years," Ikora said to Osiris, the only one to address him directly. "I need help," Osiris replied. "I know," Ikora responded, hands clasped behind her back. She stared intently at her former mentor. Back in her Crucible days, that uncompromising gaze was often the last thing her opponents saw. Aunor glanced sidelong at her superior. Harper coughed and looked down at his datapad. "Two years ago, Guardians entered the Infinite Forest," Osiris continued. "They aided me in defeating the Axis Mind Panoptes, preventing a Vex apocalypse from befalling this system. "In the process," he looked between each of them in turn, "Some Guardians reported a body they found in the Forest depths." Ikora sighed. "Saint-14 never came back from that last mission to Mercury. We finally knew why. I reacted to it the only way I knew how."

Desperate Times.

“I do not understand all of this code. This is Geppetto’s specialty,” Saint-14 says while standing bent over a wide desk covered in data tablets. Holographic images of the Lighthouse shimmer in the Hangar lights. “We could use the Crucible right now. Your trials. This will be very helpful. You mean to stay, yes?” “I will. Long enough to show you how to implement the simulation; but tonight, I must disembark,” Osiris says. “So soon?” Osiris tenses his jaw in forced silence. He twiddles with code. “I’m worried about what Vance found.” Saint places a heavy hand on Osiris’s chest. “Let go of your obsession. Do not leave chasing phantoms again.” “Phantoms… You think the Darkness is satisfied? This is just the first move. I need to know the next before it’s made.” “If there is something you fear, let me help you. We face this together.” Osiris’s mind drifts to the Dark anomalies. Saint doesn’t need another burden. “The safest place for you is the Tower, Saint. Time... tends to renege on its gifts.” “So, your mission is dangerous?” Osiris considers lying. “Potentially.”

Immolant I.

There are many more sources I could list on his bluntness and honesty but there’s honestly too much. What is important to extrapolate from all of it is this:

OSIRIS SPOKE THE TRUTH NO MATTER IF IT GOT HIM IN TROUBLE. IT IS ONE OF THE MAIN REASONS HE GOT EXILED.

Protecting the City & Humanity

Idk where people get the idea that he’s abandoned the City and humanity. And I don’t understand where people think it’s “typical Osiris behavior” to choose to put the City in danger.

I want to make something very clear here:

Osiris was exiled. He did not abandon the City. And though others view him as abandoning it, that wasn’t his intention. He never intentionally abandoned it. Everything he did was in pursuit of a brighter future for humanity. Let’s look at one of his lines from the Sundial activity during Dawn.

“By the time I left the City, many believed my practices to be sacrilege. But my methods have prevented countless futures not unlike the one you walk now. When it is laid out before you, would you not sacrifice anything to see this future shut?”

The Sundial.

He left because he weighed his options and he saw that humanity would have better use of him if he left. He cares A great deal about the City. He cares almost too much about it. He would never give Lakshmi the technology to cause it harm, especially knowing that she’s unstable. And I’ve seen some people think he’s playing 5D chess? In what world would he ever choose to bring harm upon humanity for some sort of... agenda; which I’ve already cleared up earlier, he’s open about his plans.

Let’s look at more known lore about Osiris’s feelings of the City & humanity.

"You've wrapped your mind around an idea of your own making. I have always tolerated this fawning 'movement' of yours, but this is a step too far." Osiris seethed. Brother Vance was awestruck. He stared blankly at Osiris, unsure of what he could say to quell his anger and dissolve his frustration. "What I have discovered…" "…is dangerous enough to destroy every man, woman, and child in existence. You're meddling with forces outside your grasp," Osiris reprimanded. "I warn you here and now, remove yourself from this Lighthouse. Find a simple life. Start a family. Write music. Leave Mercury and this fool's errand behind."

Chapter 8: Idolatry.

Osiris was furious to find out Vance was experimenting in his name by endangering people for his goals. And he was especially mad that he would dive into such dangerous areas so much so that it had the potential to destroy humanity.

"It's truth." Osiris considers this. "Truth seems subjective these days," Osiris says, finally observing his entourage for the first time. Among them, a small group of men and women, stand two wayward Guardians—Warlocks, it appears—and a child. Their forlorn faces resonate with him. Castaways and believers. The weeks since his departure from the Last City have worn on him. He was used to working alone, knowing he could fall back to the City's resources should he need them. Now, adrift in the expanse of purpose, he finds himself longing for a place he could return to. A sanctuary.

Chapter 2: Postexilic.

Here’s a few lines from Season of Dawn:

“The Traveler, mutilated. Mercury, a desolate warzone. This is the bleak future the Cabal wants for us all. We do not know what has become of humanity here. I hope we will not find out.”

.

“There are many terrible futures, but I have not grown numb to seeing them. The future the Cabal wish for is a nightmare for humanity.”

.

“If the Traveler fled the system, there is a chance that the Darkness would ignore our region of the galaxy entirely. It would sacrifice our second awakening, our ability to wield the Light, but potentially continue our Golden Age. There are too many variables at risk, but it's a variant path worth investigating in the Infinite Forest.”

.

“This battered Mercury is a blueprint for our system. Lightless, bowed, and nothing more than fuel for an endless war. It must never come to pass.”

The Sundial.

There are many. Many. More lines I could put here about how much Osiris doesn’t want to see humanity suffering. And especially how he doesn’t want the City to be at risk. But I think you get the picture.

Know that the Vex are true Evil.

So. We all know Osiris as “the Vex guy.” His whole thing is on fighting the Vex. However it seems people think that he’d be okay with using them for grounds of a higher purpose? Or something? I don’t know, everyone I see rebuffing Osiris’s actions with Lakshmi don’t seem to be interested in explaining this one.

So anyways. Let’s talk about how Osiris views the Vex as true evil compared to other species.

“The Fallen are not so different from us. How hard would you fight if the Light were taken from you?” “Those stories ring false to me,” said Saint. “They are not a noble people. I’ve fought them, and so have you.” “I have not fought them all,” the Warlock replied, pulling his hands apart to create an intricate web of hovering cubes and points of light. “They are nothing, no threat—not like the Vex. Not like the Darkness.”

Vanguard Commander.

[u.2:06] Have you spoken to the House of Light, like I asked? [u.1:07] I would rather not speak with Fallen. [u.2:07] They may need our help. Their cause is just. [u.1:08] What happened to “trust no one?” [u.2:08] What happened to your sense of right and wrong, hero?

Maintenance Operations Log 30037.

The unenlightened wonder at my so-called "fixation" upon the Vex. They believe our gravest existential threat is the Hive, for those beings have made a pact with the Darkness itself via the medium of the Worm Gods (according to Toland, at least, and I see no reason to doubt him in this). But Darkness is not merely absence of Light. Darkness is an entity unto itself. Put simply, Darkness is not Nothing. But the Vex? The Vex seek neither Light nor Darkness. They seek Convergence, the reduction of all life to its simplest, most meaningless form. An entelechy of zeros and ones. "Evil" is a word for sentimentalists and fools. But, in the ontology of the sentimental, the Vex are more deserving of the term than the Hive. Given a choice between Darkness and Convergence, I would choose Darkness. It is a logical choice. Yet for this they banish me.

Kairos Function (Hunter).

This one is important because Osiris doesn’t subscribe to the idea of “good” and “evil”, and that he would go so far to say that the Vex are Evil shows just how much of a threat he views them as.

It’s just. Mind boggling to me that people think that Osiris would be okay with a Vex invasion. That Osiris would encourage Lakshmi to open up a rift to “send the Fallen away” (Despite being one of the earliest sympathizers!) Osiris isn’t ineffable, he’s just a man trying to do his best to help humanity. His actions aren’t difficult to understand, they have been written to be very clear and with understanding his motives.

Saying that it’s natural for him to be secretive and have contradicting opinions and actions is just. Wrong. It’s not him. It’s not how he’s supposed to be understood. Even in Curse of Osiris I don’t think his actions didn’t make any sense.

This is going to sound very mean but I want to be 100% clear: If you think that Osiris would actively choose to put the City in danger of the Vex, if you think that he would actively choose to stand calmly and watch as his lover was about to die to the very things he spent millions of lives to save... You don’t understand Osiris. Go back and reread his lore.

I leave you with this:

The Vanguard is dubious of our intent and ability, fearing corruption and displacement. They do not trust me. You were held in similar contempt for speaking your truth and empowering free thought. You know what it feels like to be chastised and labeled a traitor. We are mere steps away from a disintegration of our institutions, and they cannot see destruction staring them in the face. ... For so long, we have clung to the Light, denying the strength offered by the Dark. By using Stasis, we will end this war. We see this contest for what it truly is: a game, played by our adversaries. And we have been the pawns. We are pawns no more. This is not a battle I want to wage without you, although we may not have a choice in the matter. Wherever you may be, please come back to us.

To Osiris.

[fictional-lvr]

Code

A/N: Yo! Sorry this req took me so long to fulfill, I hope you all enjoy it. Remember to drink water and reblog writers!

-----------

I awoke to the sound of my phone pinging, signaling a text from my best friend, Emma.

Emma: ‘Yo, if you wanna play Among Us with us, the code is ______’

She knew that I hadn’t been talking to anyone recently. Compulsive self isolation amirite? I figured that I should at least try. I slowly sat up, rubbing my eyes with my fists. I checked the time, 2:00 pm. I groaned, sick of being unhealthy, but unable to become healthy. I padded over to my setup on the other side of my small bedroom. I turned on my pc, wincing at the bright screen, a contrast to the dark surroundings of my room. I quickly opened up Among Us, typing in the code that Emma sent me. I watched as my finger hit the wrong key, but I hit enter before I could react. My mouse hovered over the exit button, that was, until I saw the names of the people in the lobby. Corpse, Spedicey, Rae, Sykkuno, Toast, Pewds, This could not be happening. I did nOt just somehow, accidentally, join my favorite streamers and youtubers lobby. The little red dot popping up on the chat icon pulled me from my thoughts.

Corpse: ‘Uh, who r u’

My fingers crashed across my keyboard, desperate to not make it look like I somehow searched out, and found, this one specific code.

Y/A/N: ‘sorry. i think i typed in my friends code wrong’

I quickly typed out, slamming enter with my pinkie. I took a deep breath, trying to not freak the fuck out. I anxiously stared at the chat icon, waiting for someone to say something.

Rae: ‘I mean, we do need a filler,’

Spedicey: ‘Wanna play?’

Yo. What the fuck? Was this happening? Was this real? I shook the thoughts out of my head, starting to frantically type.

Y/A/N: ‘fuck it. sure’

I buried my face in my hoodie sleeve covered hands, letting out a muffled screech. Alright. I needed to calm the fuck down. I took a couple deep breaths before seeing the red dot appear once again on the chat icon.

Corpse: ‘whats ur discord’

-------------------------------------

After putting my discord in the chat, I waited. Staring at my discord, waiting to be invited to a server or something. Then I got a notification from Corpse, a friend request and an invite to the Among Us server, in that order. The way I slAmmed my finger onto the mouse button the accept the friend request was almost sinful. “Jesus christ” I muttered to myself, accepting the invite to the server, much more calmly this time. I saw that everyone has already joined the call. I adjusted my mic, cleared my throat, and joined the call. I heard all of them laughing at what someone had said “Wait guys they’re here!” I heard Sean's voice cut through. “Uh, yeah, hi” My voice sounded quiet and small. I cringed a little bit at it before I heard Rae say, “Oh my god I love your voice it’s so cute!” In an excited tone. I chuckled a bit. “Thank you, I just woke up so it’s a little wonky right now but that's fine” I stated, rubbing my eyes a bit, still tired. I never got enough sleep. “What time is it for you?” I heard Corpses voice say. His voice sounded even better on call than in videos, and probably even better in person. But his voice is not him, it’s not why we love him. It’s just a feature of him. Nevertheless, it gave me butterflies. “Uh like 2:15 I think” I replied, checking my phone for the time as I did so. “Oh, cool, same for me” Corpse said, he didn’t sound anxious per say, but he sounded a bit nervous. But, to be fair, I sounded more than a bit nervous. “So, what’s your name?” Sykkuno asked. “Y/N” I stated, smiling a little. “Nice to meet you Y/N’ Sykkuno replied. “Pretty name,,” I heard Corpse mumble. “Uh, I- Thank you” I stuttered out. God, why did I sound so damn nervous? These people are just people. They’re the same as me. I heard Corpse let out a small nervous giggle.

------------

We all talked for a bit, just them asking me simple questions and me answering. “Yo, who wants to wear the cat ears with me?” Corpse asked, I replied without a thought “I gotchu, Corpsey” I heard him laugh a little bit. His laugh was so nice. “WELL I WANNA WEAR THEM TOO” Sean scrEamed. You don’t realize how much he turns the volume down in editing until you’re actually talking to the man. “Goddamn that was loud” I laughed. “Oh yeah, Sean is very loud. All the time. You can’t escape it.” Felix warned, I giggled at his statement. “Oh I know, I know” I responded, receiving a laugh from Sean and Felix. “Y/N! Put on the fUcking cat ears” Corpses voice boomed through the call. I jumped a bit at the sudden sound. “Woah, a little close to the mic there aren’t we?” I laughed out, moving my littol bean character to the customization thing, putting the cat ears on. “How else was I supposed to get your attention?” Corpse asked, still very, very close to the mic. I laughed, and before I could open my mouth to respond, Sean cut in “Literally just talk. You have a voice like fuckin shortwave radio.” I started laughing even harder, attempting to put my head down on the desk, but instead, FULLY bOnking it. “ow” I muttered, laughing quietly. “yo was that your fucking head?” Sean asked, I laughed a little louder before answering, “look, I have like zero control over my body at any given time” earning a chuckle from Corpse. I smiled, making him laugh made me smile.

----------------

After a few games, Corpse and I got imposter together. I hate being imposter. We were doing alright until fUcking Rae just hAd to see me vent. “ITS Y/N SHE VENTED I SAW HER” 

so naturally we lost that round

---------

After we had played quite a few games, everyone was pretty tired, except for me and Corpse. “Alright bye you guys! Thank you so so much for letting me play, it was fun” You could literally hear the smile in my voice. Everyone had left the discord call other than me and Corpse at this point. “So, uhh, can I get your Instagram real quick? I just realized I don’t even know what you look like” Corpse spoke somewhat awkwardly, almost as if he was nervous for some reason. “Well, to be fair, I don’t know what you look like either” I retorted, laughing. He gave me a chuckle in response and hesitated before saying; “I mean, we could change that, yknow, if you like, wanted to,,or something”

-----------

Tag List:

@amaikitsune

@into-the-end

@corpsesimpp

[lovelivingmydreams]

Aparently writing fanfics about Sanders sides AU’s is a thing that I do now

So some of you might know  @rondoel made this really cool comic thing about king creativity. Master post here for those who don’t. The internet was given permission to do whatever they want with it. So this is not ‘canon’ to that comic, but an idea that won’t let me be until I write it down. So here’s part one of two:

Lost in thought

Virgil took a deep breath as he wrapped himself around baby Patton and looked up to Janus and Logan expectantly. They were both bowed over a desk with several memories and notes scattered all over. They hadn’t even noticed he’d left the room, and that might’ve been for the best. His attempt at talking to the king hadn’t gone as well as he’d hoped. He hadn’t been optimistic enough to think that upon his apology the king would split and Roman would run over and embrace him and get everything back to normal. But he’d thought something might change, anything at all. But now all he’d accomplished was making himself feel even worse.

Was Roman really gone gone? Forever?

And Remus? Sure he was a pain to deal with sometimes, but… they’d grown up together.

Virgil wanted them back, even if this new guy- well new to him- hadn’t been so scary, he wanted his friends back. Thomas was sleeping and likely wouldn’t get out of bed until he really had to in order to eat and drink tomorrow. They had survived a day in this chaos, only because Thomas was taking a break. Their host was still exhausted and would likely not be overly active for the next week. And with things being how they are, that was a good thing.

With his coherent thoughts muted, his moral compass and emotions reduced to a non-verbal child and his anxiety incapable of properly analyzing the situation out of fear of causing absolute chaos in the mindscape… None of that could be good. At least Thomas wouldn’t call for them unless king gave him a very urgent reason to. Virgil took a deep breath and returned his attention to the present. Hopeful that Logan and Janus had come up with something after a full day of sitting in this library. Just because Logan was mute, didn’t mean he wasn’t the smartest among them anymore right? And Janus, no matter what else Virgil thought of him, was very clever too. Surely they’d know what to do… Or maybe Virgil could still do something? Logan had once told him that he was needed to get them out of sticky situations when they do come up.

This situation was very sticky.

“Lo? Janus?” he asked softly, mindful of the fact that baby Patton was all tuckered out in his arms.

He gently got up from his spot against the bookcase and readjusted his grip, feeling the way the luxurious fabric moved around his body. The material was soft and warm, but the uniform was nowhere near as comforting as he’d like. He missed his hoodie, but he didn’t dare risk going into his room  to look for it in his current condition. Still… maybe he could ask one of the other’s to see if they could find one, even if it was his old pre ‘fitting in’ hoodie… It always made him feel safe. Big enough to hide away in when the world became too much and to hide how small and weak he looked. This outfit made him look like a child next to the others. He never liked that about his appearance. Despite being a nearly thirty year old adult like everyone else, he still looked like a teenager whose body hadn’t fully caught up with his new height. No wonder the king looked down on him. In his eyes, he was probably just a kid. King clearly felt like he was older and wiser than all of them…

He shook himself out of his thoughts. He has to focus on here and now.

“What should we do?” he asked.

The two older sides exchanged a glance, Logan nodded and Janus cleared his throat uneasily.

“We can’t do much…” he admitted reluctantly. King had apparently been right, with everyone else out for the count, his ability to lie was near nonexistent.

“Neither of us are strong enough to stand up to him., he has made sure of that. And even if we were all at full strength, I don’t think me or Logan, even if we were to work together, would be able to match him now. Not even if Patton helped us. Creativity has matured with Thomas and grown stronger. You might stand the best chance, but in your current condition…”

“Me?” Virgil asked shocked. He was only ‘powerful' when Thomas was really overwhelmed or in imminent danger. That is when he could shut everyone else up, or focus them on a single task. And even then he had little control over even himself.

“Yes Virgil,” Janus insisted looking at him like the words held the key to world peace. “Like I explained earlier, he has nothing against you personally.

This is about me, Logan and Patton. But he knows you can shut his ideas down with just a few well-placed doubts in Thomas’ head, as he himself acknowledged. And he is right to fear you Virgil. You were a great source of motivation for Thomas to get creative, but you can take that motivation away just as easily.”

Virgil shook his head. Shutting creativity down completely? Even if… well no, Janus was right. He could. He had told Roman no so often in the past and despite Roman’s promises to strike him down he never even tried. When Thomas asked to get rid of him that first video, Roman hadn’t even tried to confront him head on, pretended they weren’t in the same room… Had Roman been afraid of him? Could he truly hit the brakes? No out of the question.

“I get that we can’t let him just run the place, but Thomas… I can’t hurt Thomas like that. He needs his creativity too much, especially now with everything… It would be devastating,” he insists as he gently runs his fingers through baby Patton’s hair. Creativity helps Thomas cope when life becomes too much.

He catches sight of Logan looking down in what he believes is shame. Why? What was everyone’s deal with this creativity?

“Maybe, if I knew what happened, before me, before the split,” he tries. “Maybe I could try talking to him again? See if he can see it our way?” he suggested. He wanted Roman and Remus back. But his priority had to be with the others. Who knew if the brothers would be able to reverse what the king did? Or if things would go back to normal once the king disappeared? He couldn’t risk that. So first, help everyone else and then see if they can get the twins back. He hated prioritizing like that, but it was for Thomas.

Janus and Logan exchanged another look and then, as one, shook their heads at Virgil.

Logan silently cleaned up their research and turned away to head to his room without another wo… well, glance. It was so fast Virgil couldn’t even decipher the emotion that had flashed underneath the surface of his stoic mask.

Janus on the other hand put on a comforting smile and patted him on the shoulder in an overly friendly gesture. “This is not your burden to carry Virgil. It doesn’t matter anyway. We’ll think of something. You just focus on staying calm and looking after Patton, alright?”

Without waiting for an answer Janus hurriedly followed Logan and left Virgil alone and slightly frustrated in the library. Great. Just great. It wasn’t the first time he asked about the king. Even before this whole mess, he'd been curious for ages. But he was always dismissed with “it's in the past" and the like. But now it wasn’t in the past anymore and the other’s were still leaving him in the dark. What were they hiding?

Virgil sighed and started wandering. Or he wanted to wander but his “promotion” seemed to lead him to his “ boss’ ” domain the second he lost focus. Soon he found himself stranded in the never ending fields of imagination. Virgil stopped walking, not wanting to interrupt his majesty again, and tried to focus on Patton's steadily moving chest.

He was scared. Without much else to distract him, even the task of protecting baby Patton would soon seize to keep the bad thoughts at bay. Especially with everything being so terrible.

He wanted Roman to be here. He'd know how to distract him. At the very least he wanted his music so he could agonize in peace for a little while. When he listened to music, he could sort through the feelings without them actually translating into thoughts. Just then he saw something appear at his feet.

Curiously he sat down Indian style and noted to his delight that it was his headphones and a music player. He eagerly put it on and scrolled trough the lists. It had all of their Spotify lists downloaded as well as a list that just read ‘TSS’. As he scrolled trough it he learned that it contained all of their lists combined into one along with every song Thomas had ever created and/or performed.

Well. That would do it. He put on the phones, curled himself around Patton once more and started humming.

[marybeatriceofmodena]

I've been watching this video by Ellie Dashwood, where she talks about the thematic role Mary Bennet plays in Pride & Prejudice (among many other things), and at some point, she mentions why Elizabeth Bennet has three love interests (I mean, more or less, but I'll call them that to make things easier for me to explain), namely Mr. Collins, Mr. Darcy, and Mr. Wickham.

(BTW, if you haven't subscribed to Ellie's channel and you like anything that has to do with Jane Austen, the Regency era, and the Victorian era, please do! She doesn't have nearly enough views and subscribers for the excellent work and research she does and she just seems like the sweetest person ever, so please go and support her channel!)

To sum up her point real quick, having Mr. Collins, Mr. Darcy and Mr. Wickham as LIs for Lizzie is to lead the reader to compare them. Obviously, Lizzie picks Mr. Darcy because she realizes she's in love with him, but also, compared to Mr. Collins and Mr. Wickham, who are both "extremes", he's basically the "middle" option that is preferable for Lizzie. You can also think of how Jane and Lizzie are also "middle" options, while Lydia and Kitty as well as Mary also represent "extremes" (which is probably the reason why people ship Mary with Mr. Collins or why Lydia ends up with Mr. Wickham).

One of the issues with the Grisha trilogy is that Alina pretty much ends up in a similar situation. She has 3 LIs as well, who are Mal, Nikolai, and the Darkling. So, let's say L/eigh B/ardugo absolutely wants to keep the theme of "beware of dangerous sexy wizards", which would lead to the Darkling being the obvious Mr. Wickham option. That being said, the key difference is that while Alina will get whacked over the head by some characters and the narrative for daring to experience any kind of feelings towards the Darkling, the worst Lizzie gets on a personal level (minus the Lydia situation, given it affects her family at large) is her regretting she didn't warn her family about Wickham, which also isn't really used as leverage to view her as lesser or stupid. (Hell, even Marianne Dashwood is treated more sympathetically than Alina in regards to Willoughby!)

What about Mal? I think it's safe to say that given the large negative reaction against Mal and Ma/ina back in 2012-2014, when TGT was being published, Mal is the Mr. Collins equivalent. Until Ruin and Rising, where Mal's characterization does a complete 180° turn, he basically sees himself as "entitled" to Alina, in several instances I think most of you will be familiar with by now. Which, mind you, is quite similar to what Mr. Collins says to Lizzie in his own marriage proposal to her, since he argues that she has no choice but to accept him because he's the best offer she'll ever get (WHAT A GUY). And that's just one similarity I can point out between the two, because the list is endless.

So that leaves Nikolai as Mr. Darcy, right? Obviously, I've seen some of my mutual roast him by calling him Diet Darkling, which is not entirely untrue, but... shouldn't that be the point? If he's the middle option, shouldn't he have the Darkling's and Mal's qualities, without having any of their undesirable flaws? So, wouldn't it make sense for Alina to choose Nikolai?

Regardless of how you feel about Nikolai, whether you love him or hate him, whether you think this option would be clumsily done, too heavy-handed or actually pretty good, I think people would be a lot less bitter about how TGT ends, even if it means Alina still loses her powers and ends up with Nikolai (because, hey, she still becomes Queen and maybe she actively works to make Grisha's lives better!), he's still the "middle" option, and good ol' brain science would lead us to think "Huh, that makes sense".

For my part? I would probably still not like the way the Darkling, the Grisha cause and Darklina would be overall handled, but unlike the unfortunate implications with Mal and a Ma/ina endgame, while I would probably come to the conclusion that me and LB will never see eye to eye, I would be able to understand what she was trying to do with her story with a Nikolina ending, and the aftertaste would be a lot less sour for a lot of people.

[bluefirewrites]

T.Rex, Velveeta, and Other Fun Names

A one shot I made, thanks to @lydias--stiles and @blush-and-books. 

We were talking about what Luke’s middle name could be and it sparked an idea for this quick little one shot (which is neither quick or little actually.)

Could also be read on AO3. 

ENJOY!

____________

Lucas T. Patterson

The madness of this week all started when Julie thumbed through Luke’s journal and found her songwriting partner’s messy scrawl inscribed in the behind the front cover.

Yeah, it was his name, Julie would have griped about how illegible it was and moved on to whatever song she and Luke had been workshopping the day before and thought nothing of it-

If it weren’t for the fact that there was a flurry of deep inset scratches of pen scribbling out the space where his middle name was supposed to be, leaving only the ‘T’ unscathed…

“So I was thinking, maybe we change the key. I thought I was feeling A Major,” Luke rattled off, playing the aforementioned series of chords on his electric, “But now, I think we could really intensify it by flipping to a minor key-”

“What’s the 'T' stand for?”

The ghost looked up, confused, “Huh?”

Julie held up the inner cover of the journal, pointing to his name, “Lucas T. Patterson. The ‘T’- what does it stand for?”

It was a simple question, but all color drained from his face.

“O-Oh. Oh that?” Luke stammered through, struggling to rid himself of his guitar, the skull and rose strap kept swatting his face in his hurry.

She nodded.

He was across the room in seconds, back facing her, pretending to fiddle with the amp settings, even going as far as inspecting Alex’s drums. Thank goodness the drummer wasn’t there right now or else he would be getting a thorough lecture. ("Tell him to stop touching my drums!" extended to his bandmates as well).

“It, uh, stands for my middle name,” he said, still not looking at her.

“I get that. So what is it?”

“It’s nothing,”

Julie rose from the piano bench, traversing the studio until she was right behind him. She forced him to pivot and face her, “No, it’s clearly something.”

Luke gave a dismissive wave and a weak nonchalant laugh, “It’s not a big deal,”

“It clearly is if you won’t tell me,”

Then his head cocked to the side. He cupped his ear, “Uh, what’s that? I think I heard Carlos!”

“What?” She couldn’t hear anything.

“Oh, you need help, Carlos? On my way!”

“He can’t even-”

In a flash of light and warp of reality, Julie was alone in the studio.

“- hear you...”

Oh boy.

Now what was that about?

________________

Ever since then, Julie’s curiosity only grew. Why was Luke so evasive when it came to his middle name? What could possibly be the reason?

With all the secrecy and going great lengths to omit it from his journal, she was betting on it being insanely embarrassing.

Which made Julie want to find out even more.

Luke didn’t get embarrassed so easily, not much to weaponize against him whenever they all made playful jabs at each other from time to time, like the friends they were. Really it was stuff like ‘Beware, Luke this shirt has sleeves’ which basically translated to ‘Haha, you’re attractive’.

Which did not pack quite the punch.

She was determined to decode Luke’s middle name, if not to quench her curiosity then to humble the guy.

He couldn’t be attractive and talented. Something’s gotta give.

(And no, she didn’t often think about how attractive and talented he was… Nope. Not at all).

“Tristan?” she threw out while they were backstage at their next gig.

Luke tuned his guitar, “Nope”

“Thomas?”

“Nuh-uh”

“Terrence?”

He finally looked up, smirking, “You will never find out.”

The tech burst in, phasing through the ghostly forms of the boys, to lead her out onto the stage.

She inwardly cursed. Saved by the bell.

“Break a leg, boss,” Luke wiggled his fingers at her before she was practically pushed past the curtain.

Even when she sat down to play the piano, Julie could not get the image of Luke’s smug face out of her mind. Oh, he probably thought her attempts were just so cute.

Yeah, cute for now.

But she wasn’t done yet.

____________________

“Alright, guys. Help me solve the mystery. What’s Luke’s middle name?”

It was one of those rare occasions where Luke was out of the house, leaving her, Alex, and Reggie alone.

The boys had been present for her previous tries to weasel Luke’s middle name out of him, and they were amused for the most part- Well, never as amused as Luke ‘Thinks He’s All That’ Patterson (not a serious contender in her guessing, by the way).

With their reactions, and however many years of brotherhood shared among the three of them, Alex and Reggie just had to know.

They were all chilling in the kitchen, Reggie perched on top of the counter and Alex lounging at the table. Julie poured herself a juice, waiting on the answer.

The bassist straightened up, “Oh. It’s-” Then he stopped, face scrunched up in a frown of concentration.

Julie directed her gaze at Alex, who was ready to jump in.

“No, wait it’s…” He faltered.

The two boys’s heads snapped to stare at each other as they pieced it together.

“Dude, I don’t think-”

“No. He had to have. I’m just blanking,”

“Guys?”

“Oh my god,” Alex uttered, pushing his golden locks back into his cap, “It took us this long to notice?!”

They were now on their feet, sandwiching Julie.

“We... don’t...know,” Reggie winced, admitting it out loud.

“How could you not know?”

“I don’t think he ever told us!” was the bassist’s defense, “He’s Fort Luke when he wants to be!”

He made the gesture of locking his lips and throwing away the key to which Alex nodded.

“Now I wanna know!”

“Me too!”

Now this was a development. If Luke’s boys had no clue, then it must be really juicy.

Taking a sip from her cup, Julie was all ready to recruit two new members for the noble cause…

_________________

Julie, Alex, and Reggie huddled in a circle at the studio, all bearing notebooks and furiously whispering at each other and scribbling away when Luke decided to make an appearance.

They dispersed, making their collusion all the more suspicious.

“Luke,” They all greeted, with the same level of enthusiasm… at the same time.  

The guitarist eyed them skeptically. Then he took in the notebooks, “You’re having a band meeting. Without me?” he asked, hurt flashed in his hazel eyes.

“No, silly. We’re having a band meeting about you,”

“Reggie!” Alex and Julie hissed.

That only added to Luke’s hurt and confusion.  

Sending him a reassuring smile, she guided him to an empty chair, placed right in the middle, just beyond the coffee table, “Sit down. Please.”

“Okay?” Slow steps and weird stares later, his butt plopped onto the seat, “Can someone tell me what’s all this abo-?”

“Lucas Theodore Patterson?” Alex leapt in front of Luke, reading his guess off his notebook.

Luke’s shoulders slumped, seeing where this was all going.

“Guys, really? You too-?”

“Is it or is it not Theodore?” Julie backed Alex up.

“God no,”

Reggie was up next, “Lucas Timothy Patterson?”

The nose scrunch answered for them.

“Lucas Tyrone Patterson?” as was Julie’s turn.

“No flow,”

And so they were stuck in a circle for the next 20 minutes, everyone taking turns guessing Luke’s middle name, their lists growing more desperate and random as they continued, even going as far as borderline yelling the names at him- that was how frustrated they were.

“Lucas Troy Patterson,”

“No”

“Lucas Trixie Patterson?!”

“That’s not even- that’s not even a guys name-”

“It’s Tyrannosaurus Rex. I’m telling you. It has to be!” Reggie slammed his notebook down, poking Luke hard in the chest with his index finger,  “Admit it! LUCAS. T. REX PATTERSON!”

“Boy, I wish,”

Their guessing game, once the last of the names have been recited, left all of them breathless (even though two of them were ghosts!).

On any other occasion, Luke would have been sympathetic, especially seeing how broken up and defeated they all looked collapsed onto the couch, glaring at him like he was the enemy.

But their fruitless attempts only made him all the more victorious.

“Nice try guys,” he patted each of them on the shoulder before heading out.

Best to give them a break.

Ya know, to deal with the defeat.

____________________

She was nothing if not persistent.

But Julie knew she might have been taking things too far when she had made the trip to Emily’s.

Look, she thought she could just pay the woman a visit, to check up on her, catch up-

Maybe ask leading questions in order to trick her into telling her her son’s middle name?

Yeah, the plan was flawed from the start because how could she so subtly direct the conversation to her dead son’s middle name.

Maybe get her to tell a story about Luke getting in big enough trouble that would have warranted the whole ‘yelling-out-your-full-name�� treatment? Which was a total stretch.

But she didn’t expect it to be the complete and utter disaster that it was.

If Alex and Reggie hadn’t gotten impatient and started snooping around Luke’s old room and digging through his things to find some sort of sign for his name, and if Luke hadn’t decided to intervene, creating all kinds of ruckus in other rooms for his mom to stop and check-

Then maybe they wouldn’t all be sitting on the Molina living room couch hours, getting read the riot act by Luke Patterson of all people.

“I had to tip over my aunt’s vase!!”

“Well, if it's any consolation, your mom always hated that vase?” Reggie chuckled before being promptly silenced by one look from Luke.

Alex spluttered, “But, like, you didn’t have to break it??”

“I did what I had to do,”

“Your mom was so freaked out!”

“Well, that’s on you guys,”

Julie just about had enough with all these games, she pushed herself up from the couch, squaring up against Luke’s unwavering gaze, “You’re being ridiculous!”

“Me?” he yelled, taken aback, “ You went to my house!”

“We just wanted to know!”

“Oh my god!” His hands gripped at his hair, “Why do you wanna know my middle name so badly?”

“I like knowing stuff about you, okay!”

Luke stepped back. Eyes wide.

That-

That wasn’t meant to come out.

Especially in the booming, shrill tone she used.

“Oh…”

Luke was playing with the sleeves of his oversized flannel, the air between them thick and brimming with awkwardness. It didn’t help that Alex and Reggie took this as the opportunity to flee.

Now it was just the two of them in the living room.

Breathing deeply to collect herself because it finally hit her- they were in a screaming match all because of a middle name . Like, Luke wasn’t the only one being ridiculous. It was her too. This whole quest to figure out what the T in his name stood for was so pointless.

They were fighting and Julie didn’t like it.

“And,” she cleared her throat, dislodging the unpleasantness, “there’s something clearly bothering you about it. Just… maybe thought I could help?”

Julie had been kidding herself. Messing with Luke might have been her initial goal, but what bugged her most about not knowing his middle name was the fact that even after all the time they spent together, there were things that Luke still wouldn’t tell her.

He was entitled to keep his secrets, yes, and she still felt bad for spying on him on his birthday. But, they were bandmates, writing partners, friends . She had confided in him a lot and he with her, and they just…

They always had this closeness. A closeness that she appreciated and didn’t take for granted.

And she had acted so recklessly because of it.

Luke nodded, taking it in. He didn’t look mad, but he understood. Julie could tell he was able to get more from her than the words she spouted at him.

“It’s, just,” his voice lowered into a self-conscious whisper, “It’s just something I don’t like a lot of people knowing...”

“I’m sorry. I pushed,”

“It’s okay,” the left corner of his mouth twitched, “You wouldn’t be Julie, if you didn’t” he playfully punched her shoulder.

She gaped at him in mock offense, “Hey!”

“Just saying. Tt’s not the first time you showed up on my doorstep, digging up my past,” she instinctively grimaced but Luke reached for her hand, intertwining his fingers with hers, “But I know it’s coming from a good place. Thanks.”

He really shouldn’t be so forgiving, Julie thought. But she was just happy that they could just leave this mess behind them.  

“I’ll get the guys to drop it,” she offered.

That made Luke laugh, “Good luck with that. Reggie’s wearing Alex down. Now he’s seriously considering my middle name to be ‘Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles’,”

“If it was that embarrassing, I’d see why you’d keep it a secret,”

It seemed like Luke wanted to say something but shook his head and thought better of it. Instead he tugged her by the hand to the door, “Come on. You never did give me your opinion on the key change…”

_______________

It was months later when it finally came out. 

They were in her room. She was doing homework and he was getting a jump start on their newest song, working side by side on the floor.

Her laptop was open, some randomly chosen Spotify playlist streaming in the background. All was well when the familiar chords of ‘Get Lost’ started playing, causing Luke to visibly tense up.

“Trevor,”

“Right. Sorry, I’ll turn it off-”

“No. That’s…” He sighed and moved into a kneeling position.

Pushing his already opened journal to Julie, Luke flipped it to the cover, where his name was written.

He pointed to the scribbles over his middle name.

Where only the T was exposed…

Trevor.

“Lucas...Trevor...Patterson?”  

“My full name. Ba-da?” his jazz hands fell flat, betrayed by the quiver in his voice.

“Oh,”

“I, uh, never liked how it sounded. And you know how I feel… about things that just don’t flow right”

Julie did. For sure. Scrapped lyrics and melodies were often what happened. Never to be brought up again.

He continued, “My mom would insist on writing out my full name on my notebooks for school- Luke Patterson is already so generic,” and the first genuine chuckle of the night huffed out, “Never used them for class of course. Just to write songs.”

“Tre-Bobby,” she corrected herself “He would have needed proof that he wrote everything...”

“My old notebook. That had ‘Get Lost’ and ‘Crooked Teeth’. Made the mistake of writing it in pencil. It’d be so easy to just-”

Slamming the laptop closed, silencing the song, Julie enveloped the ghost in a hug. He melted against her, hands gripping onto her shoulders from behind, for dear life, the weight of the reveal finally taking its toll.

“I didn’t like my middle name before. Now, I just- I just can’t stand it,” he whispered into her shirt.

“I’m so sorry, Luke”

“Were the songs not enough? He had to steal my name too?”

The ache carried by his voice made Julie squeeze tighter.

She had no words.

What Bobby did, what he took from Luke, was more than she could ever fathom. She didn’t know what to do, what to say to him to soothe the pain.

She only held him.

For as long as he needed.

___________

"How come Alex and Reggie never found out?" she would ask him later.

"Didn't make it habit to show off my journal"

She frowned, "But you let me read it."

Luke, too, had no words in response.

____________

“Hey, wanna go on a walk with me?” Julie asked him out of the blue one evening.

Luke could definitely use a break, especially from whatever row Alex and Reggie had just gotten into. He nodded and took her offered hand.

They took a stroll down her street, hands still joined but hidden in Julie’s hoodie pocket (as to not make it seem like she was grasping at air). The sun was beginning to set over the hills as they could see from their vantage point in the park, their set destination.

Julie seemed to have some purpose for this random walk because she was leading him around until they reached a tree in a more secluded part of the grounds.

Whipping out a pocket knife, Julie replaced her hand in her grasp with the odd tool.

“What’s this?”

“For a while, I lost all sense of what music meant to me. I thought music was my mom. That if she’s gone then there’s no point in going on,”

“Aw, Jules”

Her sunny disposition shone through in a smile, “It’s okay. I had to redefine music for myself. Give it new meaning. Music is not just my mom. It’s my family and Flynn. It’s you and the guys” she shrugged, “It’s me.”

“I would have told you that,” A tender touch to her forearm coaxed an even bigger smile from the girl, “You definitely are music.”

Momentarily distracted by the compliment, it took a moment for Julie to get back on track.

“What I’m trying to say is. I think it’s time for you to redefine yourself. There’s stuff in your old life that you miss, but there’s also stuff you want to leave in the past…”

It dawned on Luke what Julie was referring to.

“That ‘T’ is a placeholder. You could go by a different middle name. You could do whatever you want. You’re a ghost now. You can… move on. So,” she revealed the blade and placed it in his palm once more. She nodded at the tree.

“Go ahead. Go give your name a new meaning, Make your mark,”

Grinning, Luke picked up on her plan and began carving into the trunk, his initials, all three letters representing his name, with each mark easier to craft than the last, imbuing more love and meaning into them, just like what Julie said.

Once done, he admired his handiwork, floored by how cathartic it was, to have his name on something that was gonna last.

L.T.P

He was taking back his goddamn name.

He beheld it with pride.  

“I’ll ask again,” Julie leaned against the tree, tracing the letters with her fingers, “What’s the 'T' stand for?”

With no hesitation he said-

“Thundercat,”

“W-What?” Julie choked.

He lost it at her reaction, “You said whatever I want. I loved that show as a kid!” he giggled.  

“Lucas… Thundercat… Patterson,” Julie so badly wanted to make a comment, Luke could tell. But she changed her mind, “You know what? If it makes you so happy then go for it. Who am I to stop you?”

“Nah, I’ll think of something else later on. But it’s my afterlife. I could go through as many middle names as I want, right?”

“Exactly,”

Luke returned her knife and thought she was going to slip it back into her pocket. Instead, she strode up to the tree and proceeded to carve her own initials right below his.

“There. So your name doesn’t have to be lonely up there,” she folded up the blade and put it away.  

“You know that, uh, couples usually do that kind of thing,” Luke couldn’t help but notice that, with the way their initials were oriented on the tree.

A rosy hue graced the girl’s cheeks, “Oh...yeah.”

A beat of silence followed, just the two of them staring at the tree.

“I like how our names look next to each other though,”

Luke nodded, a warm feeling settling in the pit of his stomach and rising, “Me too.”

Squinting, he read Julie’s initials, “ J.V.M. What does the ‘V’ stand for?”

A devious glint sparkled in her eyes,  “Maybe you’ll just have to guess.”

“Aw come on!”  

She raised an eyebrow, “Oh as if you made it easy for me?”

Ok. She had him there, “Fair enough.”

The whole walk home, Luke ran through all the ‘V’ names he could think of.

“Julianna Valeria?”

“Nope,”

“Julianna Vanessa?”

“C’mon, songwriter. Where’s the flow?” she teased.

Luke snapped his fingers, believing he cracked the code, “Victoria. After your aunt,”

“No. But imagine how mad she was when she found out,”

“Venus, Vanilla, Vaseline-”

“Vaseline?”

They were at her doorstep, and he bounded in front of her, blocking her path, “I won’t give up.”

“I don’t expect you to,”

“Velveeta. Like the cheese”

“It’s Valentina,” she finally said, pushing him aside, fishing through her pockets for the keys to open the front door.

“You got Valentina while I got stuck with Trevor?” She lucked out in the middle name department, that was for sure. 

Of course someone like Julie got shacked up with a beautiful name like Valentina…

“I could change mine too. In solidarity,” she said offhandedly.

“If I go with Reggie’s suggestion: Tyrannosaurus Rex then would you be Velociraptor?”

“T.Rex and Velociraptor?” she laughed in disbelief, finally walking through the threshold of her house. Thank goodness everyone else was already upstairs.

“From this day forth, I will be known Lucas Tyrannosaurus Rex Patterson!” he confidently declared

“And I’ll be Julianna Velociraptor Molina!” she repeated, taking much pleasure in the absurdity of it.

“Were you a dinosaur kid?”

“You saw my slippers and my PJs...”

“True,”

_______

Luke didn’t expect for them to take the whole new middle name thing so seriously.

But if they so happened to greet each other next time with prehistoric roars and with him tackling her onto the studio couch and pretending to bite her like the carnivore he was, then that was for them to know…

And for Alex and Reggie to remain confused about.

__________

Bonus:

And after some years down the line and one magical reincarnation later, Luke decided to change his name again.

“Patterson’s okay,” he said to Julie, “But I think I need something new.”

“Oh yeah? What are you thinking?”

Luke went down on one knee, in front of the tree they marked up when they were teenagers, ring in hand.

“Molina sounds pretty good to me…”

[darylandbethfanforever9]

Devil’s Backbone

Devil’s Backbone

Chapter 2

AN: I hope everyone is enjoying the story so, far and here is chapter 2 :)

Story Rating: Explicit, 18+

Warnings: Smut, violence, flashbacks of past sexual assault, descriptions of torture and racial hate. Tony is not a good guy from chapter 2.

Relationships: Bucky/OC, Steve/Natasha, Billy/Wanda/Grant, Sam/Sharon, Clint/Laura and Yelena/Frank Castle/Karen Page.

Summary: In the aftermath of the Blip, Bucky struggled to find his place among the world and the Avengers. However, when he is sent on a mission to Madripoor to investigate a mysterious woman, he starts to realize maybe his past isn’t too far behind. Co-Written with WalkingPotterGirl14.

Bucky felt stunned at what he was seeing as he saw the young woman break into Natasha's room. She came out freshly showered and wearing Natasha's clothes. He couldn't see her face, as she had back turned to the cameras before walking down the hallway and going into Wanda's bedroom. She came out a few minutes later, with nothing but plenty of bottles of Wanda's shampoo and conditioner. Wanda looked stunned by what she was seeing, watching as she walked further down the hallway. The woman then broke into Yelena's bedroom. She was in there far longer than she had been in Wanda's room, and sooner or later the woman left with a suitcase, before the security camera went fuzzy. "We don't have any security footage of her face, as she kept her back to the cameras. She knew where she was going…but why did she go into Wanda, Yelena and Natasha's bedrooms?" Billy asked wearily. They didn't even know who she was. "Natasha and Yelena believe that someone escaped the HYDRA base in Belarus and hid on the quinjet. I want Romanoff, Russo, Belova, and Stark to check the HYDRA base again to see if we missed something," Fury instructed sternly. Everyone nodded and left to do what the director had instructed. "Where do you want the rest of us, sir?" Steve asked gravely. He knew this was serious. Whoever this woman was, she'd been able to remain undetected by F.R.I.D.A.Y. "I want you, Barnes, Barton, Maximoff, Ward, and Wilson to search the nearby streets for any sign of this woman. Whoever she is, she might be a threat to us," Fury said gravely, and everyone nodded in understanding.

The flight to Madripoor was eight hours. Ana passed the time by catching up with the world events that had occurred when she had been placed in cyro by her handlers. The WHIH news was reporting on a terrorist group called the Flag Smashers being sent to an underwater prison called the Raft, along with their sympathizers. The group had blown up a GRC Supply Depot in Riga, Latvia, killing seventy-nine people and injuring plenty of civilians. Five of the victims had families, with one having just started the job, and was a father of two. She shook her head in disgust. Ana was no saint in any way. She had blood on her hands, but she never deliberately tried to kill civilians during her missions. The faces of the people she had killed in the name of HYDRA or the Red Room cut her deeply. She had never wanted this life when she had lived at the orphanage. All she had dreamed about was of becoming a ballet dancer, like her mother before she had passed away. "Ladies and gentlemen, we are about to land at Madripoor airport. There will be slight turbulence due to strong winds," the voice of the pilot announced gravely. Everyone fastened their seat-belts, and Ana avoided looking out of the window. She loved the sea, but she had a terrible fear of drowning after one of the girls in the Red Room nearly drowned her at the swimming pool. The plane landed gracefully with people gradually leaving. Ana allowed a couple to leave first before she went to exit. She went into the airport, as she walked to the luggage hold area, and grabbed her suitcase, heading out as quickly as possible. Her next stop was going to High Town and getting settled in. She needed to find information on all these players, including on Peggy Carter's niece who was still living in Madripoor, despite being pardoned by the US government. She put on her dark tinted sunglasses, before going to the garage and found a black Suzuki Ignis in the car park. She smiled slightly before picking up the keys, and saw the car had black tinted windows. She hoped the windows were bulletproof, but she decided not to tempt fate. At least, not yet.

Bucky was in the living room with Steve, Sam, Wanda, Grant, and Clint, reading through the documents about the Black Widow Ops program. It felt like a dead end, until he saw a name on the list of girls in the program. 'Anastasia Liukin.' "Are we sure that Natasha and Yelena were the only two who survived the Red Room Program? What if someone else survived?" Sam was the one who asked question that all of them had been thinking. An uneasy silence fell upon them. Natasha and Yelena were very secretive about their time in the Red Room. Bucky knew both of them due to having trained them in the Red Room, and his past relationship with Natasha. Not that it was something that either he nor Natasha liked to be reminded or think about. He didn't have happy memories of his time in the Red Room. If anything, it was something that gave him nightmares. He was the bogeyman to the girls in the Red Room. A terrifying man who would harshly discipline them if they failed in any of the lessons. Failure in ballet, languages, gymnastics, or espionage was not tolerated by the superiors in the Red Room. Faintly, he remembered a young woman around sixteen being sent to be trained by him. She had been Yelena's age, but the superiors and other girls hadn't liked the fact that she still remained kind, even refusing to kill other girls in the class. He didn't know what had happened to her, but he knew Melina Vostokoff had worked as a trainer in the academy. He hated the cold bitch, and she didn't like him either and neither did her husband. Hmm…he really did wonder what happened to her. Thinking about her more, all he could remember is her refusal every time they tried to trick her into doing something painful. She was so sweet…The Red Room must have ruined her. They never let anyone out who doesn't obey them. Goddamnit…he wished his memory weren’t so damn fuzzy. "This file really says everything we need to know," Steve states quietly, turning the pages. "Anastasia Liukin…a young girl who grew up in an orphanage after her mother died…enhanced physiology, holy shit…Nat might know something seriously about this girl. Yelena too." Sam takes the folder from him, looking over it quickly. "She was abandoned at an orphanage until she was seven and then they took her away to the Red Room under the guise she would be a ballerina…there they trained her." He lowers the file and looks to Steve. "They have to know something about this…but why would they keep it a secret?" "Maybe she's really dangerous?" Wanda suggests. "It's not like them to keep dangerous threats from us," Clint argues quietly. "There has to be another reason why." "Hold on a minute," Steve mutters, getting up and heading over to where the taping was from earlier, playing it back on the screen. He had the file in one hand and looked back and forth as the video played. "What if the possible person that snuck into here was her?" "But they said-" "Wanda, I don't know if you know this, but Nat and Yelena have plenty of secrets from us," Steve says quietly, turning to her. "If this was another one of their secrets, then I wouldn't be surprised. Maybe the moment we got into the HYDRA base, we activated something, and it woke her up if she was in cyro or something, like Buck was. What if the reason she didn't activate F.R.I.D.A.Y. was because she's a spy like them? A soldier?" Steve looks over at Bucky, who was continuously looking at a picture of the girl from before. His brow furrows. "What's up, Bucky?" "I…I think I saw her." Everyone's eyes turn to him, all their attention focused on his one phrase. God, he hated being the center of their eyes. Steve walks over to where he sat, moving to sit next to him. "What do you mean?"

"I…wanted a quick drink of coffee and something sweet…Alpine was resting and I decided to head down to the coffee shop below my place to grab something and there was this girl who…bought two cookies for herself and a coffee…I didn't have enough money to get my own cookie and she overheard so she came over and gave one of hers to me…I felt like she looked familiar, I…I didn't know if it was her or not, I…" He runs his hands through his hair. "I'm sorry, guys." "Bucky, don't apologize. It has nothing to do with you. Not like we knew any better at the time." He looks down at the file. "However, if it was, we might be able to figure out where she is now. Maybe if we confront Nat and Yelena with this information, we can figure out how to find her." Bucky nods quietly. "Okay…okay, yeah, we can do that."

She had to admit, the Power Broker was hard to get by, but after some scrounging around, Ana was able to set up a meeting with the guy, having to stumble into his overtly large and grand apartment. She had to admit, it was quite the nice place. Part of her wished it were hers. "Ah, I see you've finally arrived," a voice called out to her as she walked into a large living room. She raises her brow to see a man come out who honestly didn't look like much, but she knew the power he had. "The woman of the hour. The escaped Red Room agent. The-" "Cut the crap," she states, crossing her arms against her chest. "Let's get down to business. I have a lot of money and I certainly can't use it in the United States. I want to start up here. What are my options?" The man chuckles and shakes his head. "You are assertive, I'll give you that." He grabs a drink for her, but she dismisses it, taking a seat down. She wasn't dumb enough to accept a drink from a stranger. The man shrugs and turns back around. "Having a tough day, huh?" "It's any other day. I just want to make sure I can afford the place I'm staying at, is all," she states lightly, looking up at him. "And I know that you can be the man to do that." The Power Broker snickers and shakes his head, going to sit opposite from her. "You're sweet to think you can suddenly overwhelm me like that, but if work is what you want, it is what you can get. You're a strong little girl, huh?" She feels her hands turn to fists. She hated when people said that. "I can tell from that face you got. There's years of death in those eyes, huh?" "Are you going to give me a job or not?" She asks through gritted teeth. "Isaiah Bradley," he states simply before grabbing a remote from the couch, pulling up a picture on the TV in front of them. "Do you know of him?" "I've…heard of him," she states slowly. "He was a test subject for the Super-Soldier serum years ago, but they really did really bad shit to him. Have no idea where he is now, though." "Well, I do," the Power Broker states, standing. "Isaiah is currently in Baltimore, Maryland, assumingly trying to hide out the rest of his days. But I don't plan for that to happen." Ana stands, her brow furrowed. "What do you mean?" "You see, Anastasia-" "Ana," she corrects. "Ana," he answers, with a grim smile. "I'm in the business of power. I give people the power that they want for a price. One of those ways I have done it is through the Super Soldier serum…sadly, those bloody Avengers took out one of my main scientists that was recreating the serum for me…but luckily, when one person falls, two others shall take their place. They have all of the info that they need to continue making the serum and bringing me more power than before, but all I need is Isiah." Ana stares at him in horror. "You're going to make more of those serums that killed so many people? That created those Flag-Smashers? There has to be another way-" "There is no other way for power, my dear," the man states, coming over to her. "You want safety? You want to make sure you're in charge of your life? You capture Isiah for me with your skills, and I'll make sure that money you have will never leave your side, and the power you gain will only grow. It's your choice." Ana didn't even know what to say. She knew what the serum did to people. She knew how terrifying it was. There was no way she was going to let someone like him take that again. Let him control people with that. So, she swallows and takes a step back, before grabbing the drink he had offered her earlier. Fuck it. "You can't find anyone else?" She asks slightly, feeling around her belt for a moment. "To do this dirty work?" "I could, but I'm quite positive that having someone from the Red Room do it for me would be the best option, for you and myself." She nods slightly before turning to face him, swallowing the whole drink in one sitting. It was now or never. "You see…I've always been in favour of getting what I want, so yes, in your eyes, this might be your best option for me…but it's not in my head." She lowers the glass to the table. "For me, the best option IS Madripoor…owning the city as you do. Isaiah Bradley has been through hell and back, and I don't intend to bring him forward to endure more of that pain." The man lowers his glass to the table. "Ana, I-" "I'm going to kill you, Power Broker," she states coldly. "You have five seconds to run." He takes off. She counts to five, and then runs quicker, going directly after him.

She chased him through the apartment, catching sight of him trying to run through the back garden once he exited his place. She caught up to him, just as he was heading out, before grabbing him by the back of his jacket, throwing him into the side of a back entrance door. She glared at him in disgust, before dragging him towards her. "I've seen men like you before who don't give a damn about the people they hurt," she said dangerously. The Power Broker started laughing then at her, causing her to stare at him in confusion. "Do you really think I didn't have a contingency plan in place if you refused to capture Isiah, Ana? I sent a black ops team to capture him. I've known where he lives all this time. And if he dies, then I'll just simply use his grandson," he said smugly. Ana saw red in that moment, and promptly knocked him to the point of being unconscious. She pulled out a disposable cell phone, typing in the number and waited impatiently as the phone rang. Finally, after seven rings, the woman answered. "Sharon Carter of Carter Art speaking. How can I help you?" The woman asked pleasantly. Ana decided that she needed to meet with her face to face. But no way in hell, was she giving her real name. She'd use another name. There were a few names that held deep, fond memories for her. "Hello, Miss Carter. This is Olga Omelianchik speaking. I need to speak with you urgently. Is there a place that we can talk?" She asked calmly. Sharon paused on the line. "We'll meet at my place. I'll send a car to pick you up. What's this about?" She asked wearily, causing Ana to smile slightly. The woman wasn't stupid. Then again, the niece of Peggy Carter wouldn't be stupid. "Isaiah Bradley. And send me the address. I'll drive there," Ana answered firmly. Sharon agreed and texted her the address after hanging up. She looked disdainfully at the Power Broker's unconscious body before tying his hands with vibranium handcuffs. She dragged him to the car, throwing his body in the back of the trunk, before starting up the engine and driving away.

Natasha sighed tiredly as they once again began searching the HYDRA base. There was nothing to see until she found a room that had at least ten cyrostasis chambers. One of them looked like it had been recently used, and she noticed footprints on the dust covered floor. Someone had definitely been here recently, but she had no idea who it was. Her mind then wondered to a young girl with light blonde hair, and hazel eyes but her thoughts were interrupted when a voice spoke out. "Anything?" Yelena asked quietly, as she stepped into the room. Natasha shook her head. There wasn't any sign of the mysterious woman but whoever the woman was, she was dangerous. "Nothing aside from an abandoned cyrostasis chamber. I found this file along with a backpack in a safe, but no dice," she answered wearily, showing Yelena the backpack, along with the files. They were all in Russian, which would be translated once they returned to the compound. Sighing, Natasha was relieved when they left the building and made their way to the jet. She couldn't help but feel like she had seen that woman on the security footage before.

Sharon waited wearily for the mysterious young woman to meet with her, and saw a black Suzuki Ignis parking in the driveway. A young blonde-haired young woman came out of the car, wearing a black leather jacket. She looked at her silently. "Sharon Carter?" She asked wearily, Sharon nodded and shook her hand as they walked to the back of the car. Sharon had a feeling that this woman didn't take anyone's bullshit. "That's me…and you are?" she asked cautiously. The young woman smiled slightly at her question. It didn't look like she smiled a lot. Her eyes were hard and guarded. "Ana Liukin…I have a proposition for you that I believe will benefit both of us, and your friends who happen to be the Avengers? I know you helped them when Zemo killed Dr. Nadler," Ana offered. Sharon stared at her in surprise before nodding and the woman opened the boot of her car to the young woman. Sharon was greeted by the sight of the Power Broker, tied up and unconscious in Ana's car. She stared at Ana in a stunned silence, before regaining her composure. "What do you need my help with?" She asked cautiously as Ana admired the cherry blossom trees that were blooming in her garden. "I need you to send a message to the Avengers about Isaiah Washington. The Power Broker sent a black ops team to capture him and his grandson. He wants to recreate the super-soldier serum," she explained quickly to her, Sharon nodded in understanding, and glanced at the Power Broker. "What are you going to do about him?" She questioned curiously, genuinely interested. "I'll deal with him, don't worry…I think it's time that Madripoor had a new leader, one that cleans up the place," Ana answered smoothly, before getting in her car and driving away. Sharon watched her go, impressed but also stunned by what the younger woman was doing.

Sam felt his phone vibrate before turning it on and seeing a text from Sharon. He frowned. Sharon had been working undercover for Fury but hadn't come back after the Flag Smashers and Karli had been sent to the Raft. 'Isaiah Bradley's been compromised. The Power Broker's sent a black ops team to kidnap him and his grandson. Get them out of there, Sam!' "Steve, Bucky, Clint! Wanda! We need to get to Baltimore NOW!" He shouted urgently. "Whoa, whoa, what's going on?" Bucky asks, running over to him as soon as he heard him yelling. "It's Isaiah. The Power Broker sent a team after him – we need to stop them now!" He urges. "Sharon just let me know!" Steve nods, a determined look on his face. "Then let's get going."

They had raced out to the quinjet as soon as possible, getting on as quickly as they could until they raced off to where Baltimore was. Luckily, the city wasn't too far with their mode of transportation, and within a little bit of time, they had arrived, heading straight to where Isiah's house was. As soon as they did, they could see that there were people trying to break in. But that ended almost as quickly as it began, as Steve had used his shield to knock out several of the guys while the rest of them got to work. Bucky took out a couple with his skills, Sam with his gear, Clint with his arrows and Wanda with her powers. It was times like this that Bucky actually remembered that they worked well as a team most of the time. He wished they were given more things to do like this. Show his worth to more people. Once the threat was taken out, they called the police, getting them, all sent to their cars. Bucky had wiped the blood from his face as he takes a seat down, watching as Isiah talked to Steve quietly, thanking him for coming. Even in his age with the serum, Isiah was still old. He wouldn't have been able to take on all those guys at once. "You doing alright?" He hears from above, seeing Wanda take a seat down next to him. "Seems like you're lost up here." She points to her head. Bucky chuckles a bit and shrugs his shoulders. "Just thinking about everything we do…I feel like Fury doesn't…I don't know, trust me enough yet." He looks over at her. "It's always team missions and it's never really with the ones that work together – all of us work well but then I go on missions with Sam, and we get along fine but Tony is there, or Yelena might come…I just wish more people would trust me, but I know nothing is built overnight." Wanda sighs quietly before gesturing to her. "When I first came here, he didn't trust me either. It takes time to gain the man's trust. You did try to kill him once."

Bucky cringes before rubbing the back of his head. "Yeah, you're right about that." At that moment, Clint comes around, his phone in his hands. "Hey, did you ever ask Sharon how she found that out?" "I did but she's being sort of sketchy about it," Sam answers honestly. "She won't tell me. Says there was some deal between her and a girl. Don't know who…but whoever it is, apparently she's taking down the Power Broker." Bucky's brow raises in surprise. "Just like that? She pops up out of nowhere?" "Sometimes that happens. A brand-new enemy comes around and makes the weaker one bite the dust," Clint remarks, sharpening his arrows. "If she is becoming a new Power Broker, we need to keep an eye out then…but if she was like the current one, then why would she warn us?" That was the question everyone was thinking. And no one quite had the answer to it.

As soon as she had dragged the Power Broker out of her car and back into his fancy shmancy apartment, he was practically begging for his life. She had him pinned up to a chair in his kitchen, her knife at his neck. She had told him about how she stopped his plan, how nothing was going to work as he had wanted, and now, he was going to die. He pleaded, screamed, tried to bargain, but in the end, all she wanted was his seat. His place. His power. So, she slits his throat. His blood flies onto her clothes, but she doesn't flinch. It doesn't take long for the life in him to drain out, and she tilts her head, looking at the dead body, all she can think is how aggravating it was going to be cleaning the blood from the floor. She undoes his handcuffs and watches as the body fell. If she had this power…she was surely going to make sure someone else took this damn body away. She was done hiding her sins. "Excuse me?" She calls out to an intercom, which she is met with a surprising "Yes?" She responds "Your little leader is dead. I request you come up and take him before I take you out too." There was silence on the other line for a good couple of seconds before the respond with a "Yes, ma'am." Now THAT sounded good. She took a shower after that, and by the time she had emerged with new clothes, the body was gone, and the blood cleaned. She smiles as she heads into the kitchen, pouring herself a glass of wine from his wine fridge and takes a seat down, glancing outside at the skyline of Madripoor. This whole city would be hers…at a cost. The Power Broker would kill anyone innocent to get what he wants. She drew the line at that…God knows she had done enough of it long ago. Ana sighs as she takes a sip of her wine, remembering her last moments in New York City. Her mind kept going back to the man in the coffee shop she had met not long before her flight. What was it about him? Was it his eyes? His hair? His beard? Why was she spending so much time- She gasps, the drink suddenly dropping from her hand and onto the floor, shattering. A pillar of memories struck her. That man wasn't a stranger. That man was the fucking Winter Soldier. The man that had trained her in the Red Room. "H…holy shit," she whispers, bringing a hand to her mouth in shock. It all made sense now. Why he looked so stressed, why he thought she looked familiar too…he must not have recognized her either. She wondered if he knew now. What a fucking day. She runs her hands through her hair. God…the memories she had with the Winter Soldier.

tag list: @jtargaryen18 @saiyanprincessswanie @sapphirescrolls @americasass81 @americasasssssssss @james-bucky-barnes-imagines @darkficsyouneveraskedfor @giorno-plays-piano @threeminutesoflife @marvelfansworld @connie326 @joannaliceevans-fanficblog @lex-the-flex @queenoftheunderdark @navybrat817 @world-of-aus @the-soulofdevil @gogolucky13 @writersbuck @mypoisonedvine @captain-barnes-writes and @nomadicpixel and @nsfwsebbie 

[andromedasstarship]

faceless, nameless - chapter 2

photo credit - unknown 

pairing - kylo ren x reader

warnings - canon-typical star wars violence, torture, fighting, angst. 

summary - You took a moment to examine this guy and that’s when it hit you, FN-2187, a stormtrooper was wearing Poe’s jacket and you could’ve sworn you saw red.

blog rules

a/n - i dont claim any ownership over dialogue pulled directly from the films :) this chapt is like 3.5k so buckle up!!! 

masterlist // read it on ao3 here 

chapter 1 // next chapter 

-----

the stars

Present Day 

Starkiller Base. 

A few months ago, you had given everyone on base a lesson in First Order torture techniques. Personally, you thought it was a rather pointless activity, knowing full well that none of them would ever be even slightly capable of standing up against Ren. Poe blabbed on about ‘hope’ and ‘they need to be able to find comfort’ and other random ‘good guy’ optimism nonsense. At the end of your lesson you stressed that the best chance they had of keeping their mouth shut was to find a memory- a good one-, and latch onto it as tight as possible until the Order was finished with them. 

Poe was really glad he talked you into giving that lesson, seeing as your advice had helped him withstand the past few hours of near constant torture at the hands of the Order. Various troopers and officers had come and gone, all failing in their attempts to extract what he had done with the last piece of the map to Skywalker. 

Around hour three his body began to give out and all he could think about was how you certainly hadn’t been lying in your constant complaints about how cold Starkiller was. As he faded into unconsciousness, he silently prayed you weren’t having a full blown breakdown and that BB-8 had somehow managed to find you on Jakku. 

When he woke again, no clue how much time had passed, he was greeted with a deep modulated voice from the other end of the room. Ren. 

“I had no idea we had the best pilot in the Resistance on board.” Ren stated, voice flat. “Comfortable? 

“Not really.” Poe responded, voice equally as flat. Behind his mask, Ren was staring quizzically down at him. Ren was more than used to the feelings of intense hatred that his prisoners projected towards him- if anything it was the expected response-, but there was something so different about the emotions Poe was projecting, unlike anything he’d ever experienced. It was so... personal. 

“I'm impressed, no one has been able to get out of you, what you did with the map.” 

It didn’t take a genius to know what was coming next. Not bothering to respond, Poe started to slip back away into his happy memory. In his mind, you were there, back turned to him but he could still hear you laughing as the two of you ran through the field by his childhood home 

He was forcibly removed from the memory when Ren reached outwards, slamming Poe back against the chair, with the Force. “I see.” Ren said darkly, twisting his hand ever so slightly, watching in enjoyment as Poe began to strain against the pressure building in his brain. 

Poe’s mind was panicked, trying in vain to hide the memory of you, but it was too late, as Ren had already caught the tail end of it. 

“Is it a girl that holds the last of the map Dameron?” Ren taunted, forcing his way deeper into Poe’s mind. 

Poe’s face was scrunched up in agony, desperate in his attempts to shield your identity from Ren. Ren mistook the admirable struggle as proof that it was this girl who held the key to the map, rather than Poe’s personal attempts at keeping you safe. Ren continued his mental assault, breaking down every mental wall Poe tried in vain to put up. 

A flash of your masked face. Ren was getting closer. 

Then there it was, you- unmasked, no disguise-, staring up at Poe in his memories. 

Poe in his panic started thinking of every single thing he could- what he ate for breakfast before he left, the color of his favorite shirt, the list of chores he had to do on base-, anything to try and divert Ren from you. 

It was like time stopped, the mental probe retreated only for an instance before Ren was back in Poe’s head with a new unrelenting force, pulling up Poe’s most recent and clear memory of you. 

“I don’t like the idea of this.” You said quietly.

“Have I ever let you down Princess?” Poe said with a grin. When that didn’t seem to amuse you, he put a hand on your cheek, angling your face up towards him. “Three days, I’ll see you on Jakku then. I promise.” 

And then the memory was gone. 

----

Jakku. 

It had been two years since Poe and blondie- you later learned his name was Leokai-, had stumbled upon you bleeding out in the sand. Adjusting to Resistance life had been difficult and for months you thought you’d never gain their trust. It wasn’t until you had accompanied Poe to a Resistance ‘recruitment’ meeting and noticed a First Order operative slinking around the crowded room. You had quite literally dragged Poe as far away from the building and off the planet in a matter of minutes, effectively saving him from giving a ‘we’re right here’ speech directly to the Order. After that, the general opinion about you among Resistance members turned positive. 

You still donned a disguise for their safety, lest their mind was ever blended up by Ren. It was incredibly simple, a well designed wig and different colored contacts. Natural enough that you’d never attract undue attention, but still enough that unless Ren had specific intel to look for this version of you, he’d never double check a fleeting memory that might include you; luckily no one had been unfortunate enough to test this theory. During any official Resistance business or battles you donned a plain white mask that wrapped securely around your face. 

When you first got the mask, you and Poe had had a field day with it, trying to figure out how much movement it could handle before falling off; Leia had actually caught the two of you trying to tie yourself to Poe’s X-Wing to see if that would finally get the thing to move. 

All in all, life with the Resistance was treating you pretty well. Except for right now, as you anxiously waited for Poe in a small nondescript ship on the outskirts of the Niima Outpost in Jakku. Poe, you had quickly learned, was one of the biggest idiots you had ever met. You weren’t exactly sure how he had talked you into splitting up for this mission. Splitting up was never a good idea, how had every horror HoloNet show not taught him that already? But Poe had made an undeniable point, the First Order- the Knights of Ren specifically-, were hot on his trail for the last piece of the map to Skywalker and you couldn’t risk being caught up in that fight. 

So, you agreed to split up. But Poe was late.  Late enough to warrant the uncontrollable worrying. Ever since ‘the incident’ you had developed a horrible case of ‘abandonment issues’; everyone reassured you it was a perfectly reasonable response, but you hated it, the complete lack of control over your own brain drove you nuts. You were pacing back and forth, doing your best to calm your nerves. Wherever Poe was, for his sake, you prayed he had a damn good reason for being late. Knowing that you were full of nerves,  Poe had even given himself a very wide arrival time so you wouldn’t worry. But here you were, worrying . 

Unable to wait around any longer, you decided to gear up and make your way to the outpost. If you were lucky, maybe someone had seen him or maybe you’d even find him yourself. You pulled your hair tight to the back of your head, clipping it in place, before sliding your mask on. As you headed out the doors of the ship you grabbed your staff, slinging it around your shoulder. A year ago, you managed to finally access funds that you had left behind on your home planet. Not only did it help purchase a lot of life saving supplies for the Resistance, it also meant you were able to buy and build a brand new staff for yourself. It wasn’t as advanced or sleek as the one you used in the Order, but it did the job just as well. 

The trek to the outpost would only take less than an hour, giving you adequate time to try and calm your nerves. You made a list as you walked, you made a lot of lists these days, having found it greatly helped in controlling your anxiety. 

Poe was just a bit lost, his sense of direction was never as good on the ground as it was in the air. 

Poe was being his charming self and chatted up someone a little too well and lost track of time. 

You still had your ship and if he wasn’t back by the end of the day you’d be going back to D’Qar and putting together an official search party. 

You struggled for a solid fourth item, but by then you were just reaching the outpost. It was loud and dirty and unlike anything you’d ever been to before. No one gave you a second glance, which you were grateful for. As you made your way through the many stalls you were growing more and more antsy, none of the people you saw being Poe. 

Nearly two hours had passed and you had thoroughly walked through the entirety of the outpost, not that there was much, at least ten times. Just as you were about to turn around and head back to the ship, a familiar shade of orange and beeping caught your attention. You almost fell to your knees in relief when you saw BB-8. Except he wasn’t with Poe, but rather a...scavenger girl? It was like BB-8 could feel your eyes on him, because he turned around to look at you and began beeping excitedly. The girl beside him turned to face you as well and without thinking you got a better grip on your staff and ran at her. 

The girl’s face morphed in confusion, but quickly put together what was happening and got her own staff into position, giving you one last look before she turned and started to run as well. Her hesitation and your own speed meant you easily caught up, swiping at her legs which sent her topping down. She hit the sand hard, not letting it stop her as she rolled to her back and instinctively pushed her staff upwards, expecting yours to come down. 

What she definitely didn’t expect was the electrical end of your staff, on and buzzing, pointed straight at her face. 

“You stole this droid.” You hissed. 

Before she had time to respond, BB-8 was rolling up to the two of you, beeping like hell. It was a funny mix of ‘I’m so excited to see you’ and ‘please don’t hurt this girl’ and ‘I’ve got so many stories to tell you’ and ‘I promise this girl did not steal me’ and other random beeps. He was talking so fast and your head was still clouded with adrenaline, so it took you longer to process what BB just said. As soon as you realized the girl hadn’t just not stolen him, but rather saved him, you turned the electrical current off and pulled your staff away from her face. 

You stuck your hand out, glad she was unable to see the look of pure embarrassment on your face. “I um, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have chased you like that, I just saw BB and…,” you trailed off, unsure of how to explain yourself. 

Luckily, the girl grasped your hand and lifted herself off the ground. “I would’ve done the same, I think.” She replied, giving you a tentative smile. 

You still had so many questions unanswered, but before you could say anything BB-8 started beeping like crazy again; saying something about how he could see a man up ahead-staring at the three of you-, that was wearing his master’s, Poe’s, jacket. 

Not bothering to apply any of the lessons you had just learned from storming the girl, you switched the electrical end of your staff back on. A quick look at the girl told you she had the same idea, both of you getting better grips on your staffs. Both of you took off in a sprint towards the man and you  almost  felt bad for him- you were clearly taking him by surprise, the way his eyes widened like saucers-, but he was wearing Poe’s jacket. 

His attempt at escaping was short-lived. The girl swung out in front of him, shoving him to the ground- quite similar to what you just did to her-, and you quickly took up the rear, positioning the electrical end right at his throat.  

Everyone was breathing heavily, no one had expected to do so much running today. You took a moment to examine this guy and that’s when it hit you, FN-2187, a stormtrooper was wearing Poe’s jacket and you could’ve sworn you saw red. You pressed the tip of your staff to his chest, not enough to seriously hurt him, but enough to send a shock through his body. 

“I’m only going to ask once,” you started, glaring up at him from behind the mask, “where, did you, get that jacket?” Punctuating each pause with the lightest of electrical taps. 

“Ow! Ow! Quit that! I’ve had a pretty messed up day, alright? I’d appreciate it if you stopped accusing me-” 

“Liar!” You yelled, putting the end back in his face. “You stole it from his master,” you said, tilting your head towards BB-8 who was beeping in agreement, “I’ll give you one more chance to answer honestly.” 

FN-2187 raised his hands up in surrender. You studied his face for a moment, searching for any signs of deception; there weren't any, but that explained nothing. “I swear! I swear, his name is Poe. That’s right? Poe Dameron.” 

At the sound of Poe’s name your shoulders relaxed a little bit, but the relaxation was short lived as you FN-2187 continued. 

“He was captured by the First Order.” 

No. 

“I helped him escape okay, but we crashed a little further out,” FN-2187 was silent for a moment, “Poe didn’t make it.” 

No No No No No No No No No. 

“You’re…, you’re lying.” You said angrily, unable to accept that as truth. When all FN-2187 did was give you a look full of  pity, you hit the switch on your staff, pulling it back to your body. “You’re lying…” You repeated, much weaker this time, glad that they were unable to see the tears forming behind the mask. 

“I’m sorry. I really am.” FN-2187 said quietly, in a voice that was just the right amount of sincere to be true. 

Out of the corner of your eye you saw BB-8 start to roll away, you couldn’t let him get lost now. “If you even, think, about running away while I go get the droid, you won’t live to see another day.” You threatened, quickly turning on your heel to go catch up with BB. 

In your absence, the girl and FN-2187 were both still quite winded. At least you had gone into the outpost knowing there was potential for action, the two of them were completely caught off guard. 

“Are you with the Resistance too then?” The girl asked. 

A fleeting look of confusion appeared on FN-2187’s face before he jumped up and nodded. “Yes, yes I am. I am part of the Resistance. A Resistance member.” 

“I’ve never met a real Resistance member before. And now in one day, I’ve met two.” The girl replied, with a gentle smile on her face. 

By the time you managed to get BB and ‘drag’ him back to where the other two were standing, they had finished their conversation. FN-2187 tensed up when you reappeared, something you were okay with, not wanting him to feel too comfortable around you. 

No one had time to say anything before the sound of blaster fire diverted all of your attentions. A quick look up at the sky confirmed your one of your worst fears, the First Order was here. FN-2187 grabbed both of your hands and started pulling.

“Don’t grab my hand!” You and the girl both shouted out, but running alongside him anyway. The three of you weaved your way out of the Outpost, doing your best to avoid the unrelenting fire of bullets and bomber shots the Order was raining down on you. 

“They’re gunning for me!” FN-2187 screamed, causing you to roll your eyes. 

“They’re gunning for all of us, especially the droid. Now keep up!” You yelled back. It didn’t take much mental strain to understand that if Poe had really been captured and had really crashed on Jakku after escaping, that the Order would’ve followed him here. Your feet pounded the sand, pushing yourself ahead of FN. 

“We can’t outrun them!” FN-2187 called out from behind you. 

The girl was ahead of you and she pointed out towards a quad jumper. “We might! In that quad jumper.” All of you running towards it as fast as you could. 

Of course, as soon as the words left her lips, the TIE fighter tailing you blew the thing to smithereens. All three of you seemed to pause for a moment before the girl started running towards a hunk of,- oh my god was that the Millenium Falcon-  junk to her left. 

“Hey! We still need a pilot!” FN-2187 screamed, still running a few paces behind you. 

“I can pilot anything!” You yelled out, not bothering to look at him over your shoulder. The three of you, plus BB, raced up the walkway of the ship, slamming the door shut behind you. 

“Gunning position is down there.” Rey said hurriedly, pointing at a set of stairs. She didn’t look back as she rushed ahead to the pilots seat. 

Just as FN-2187 got ready to mount the stairs you grabbed him by the back of Poe’s jacket and yanked him around to face you. 

“Not the time-”

“If you do anything down there to make me believe you’re still working for them, FN-2187, I won’t hesitate to come down here and gouge your eyeballs out myself.” You spat, relishing in the way his eyes widened at the use of his official call number. You didn’t give him the chance to reply, just let go of his jacket and made your way to the front of the ship to co-pilot. 

The girl was already pulling the ship into the air by the time you made it up there. You wasted no time, quickly throwing yourself into the chair beside her. Both of you fumbled to pull on headsets as you worked the controls. “Stay low.” You ordered. 

She gave you a confused look. “What?” 

“Stay low,” you said more urgently, “it confuses their tracking.” 

The girl went low and you were glad you were strapped in. You didn’t expect the smoothest of rides, but it was certainly  jerky . 

The constant sound and feel of blaster shots hitting the exterior of the ship were making it difficult to focus. “What are you doing down there!” You screamed into the headset. “Shoot back!” 

“I’m trying,” FN screamed back up, “are the shields up?” 

You blindly reached over and smacked a button. “Yes! Now shoot !” You yelled. 

Where FN-2187 was lacking, the girl was making up for it tenfold with her piloting ability; this girl was good. Internally, you knew you were being unreasonably hard on him; it wasn’t so far fetched to believe that someone would defect from the Order, hell you defected- even if it wasn’t necessarily your choice-, and your position and relationship to the Order had been much more intimate and substantial than a ‘trooper. Pushing those thoughts to the back of your head, you focused on helping the girl pilot the ship. The two of you working in unison to attempt to shake the TIE’s trailing you.

“Hold on!” She shouted and in the background you could hear FN asking what for. The girl pulled on the steering hard and you went veering to the right before she rolled the ship around, giving FN the perfect shot at the last TIE. You internally promised yourself, that if he missed this fighter you’d be fulfilling your eye gouging promise. Luckily for all of you, but especially FN-2187, he blew the TIE fighter right out of the sky. 

“Wooo!” In the rush of the moment, you weren’t exactly sure who was whooping and hollering, it might as well have been all of you. 

Once you felt the ship was out of imminent danger and safely gliding through space, you relaxed back into your seat. Looking over at the girl you smiled, even though she couldn't see it, you hoped she was able to read the emotion from your eyes. You think she could, by the way she smiled real big back at you. 

She stuck her hand out and said, “My name is Rey. The guy downstairs said he’s Finn and he’s with the Resistance too.” 

-----

a/n - im having so much fun with this yall dont even know. likes/replies/reblogs always appreciated and if youd like to be tagged just ask! 

taglist: @egguuuu​ @sunflowersandotherthings​ @clarizuliani10​ @kylorendrip​

no permission is given to copy or republish my writing on any other platform or account. if you see this story outside of my blog or my ao3 it is stolen work. i do not own nor claim to own star wars or any of the character involved in it. 

[nexyra]

James Ironwood, for character ask? 👀

Aaaa thank you so much for the ask ♡ More rambling incoming !! Sorry for the wait btw, I've been both pretty busy and tired ;;

If you hate James Ironwood and don't wanna hear one good thing about him tap out now please ღ

My fav ship(s) for the character

I am not a super big shipper when it comes to James, but there are still some I like more than others soo here goes :

I think Ironwitch is a pretty good one. It's not necessarily a ship I'd search content for but I think these two would work well together ! Glynda is stern and honest and a no-nonsense kind of woman. She has the strenght to stand up to James when he slips or gets too stubborn when faced with the high stakes. At the same time, we've been shown that she cares for him and she knows he's only trying to do what's best for people. She has faith in him but also the ability to stand at his side as an equal. She seems to be the more steadfast of Ozpin's circle : loyal, you know you can trust her, and she will not crumble. This is the kind of personnality that I think James both admire and feel safe with. And the other way around, I think James is a good match for Glynda too. On a day to day basis, he's serious enough to not annoy here, but he's also a softie in some aspects and that's a nice combination to smooth out Glynda's edges.

Ironqrow is a completely different dynamic. The "we're annoying each other" dynamic is not one I'm particularly interested in usually xD But these two certainly had strong & interesting moments so it's a pretty valid ship !! Despite how they might butt heads because of the difference in their upbringing they (prior to V8) clearly trusted each other with their life. Even if Qrow jokes about shooting himself if he had to be one of James' man, when everything goes to shit there is no doubt in his mind that James wasn't responsible. Similarly, while James talks of shooting Qrow for his misbehaviour, when push comes to shove and we meet a tired Ironwood, run ragged by the pressure he's under... the only thing he does is hug him and reiterates how glad he is to see him. So again, they clearly have a lot of faith and trust in the other, and that's solid ground for a relationship.

My least favorite ship(s) for the character

Same spiel as always, shipping kids and adults is a big no from me; so any ships between Ironwood and RWBYJNOR can qualify here. That said, among the less uncomfortable ones, here are those I don't really like

This one is again because I love their relationship but platonically only, I'm talking of Winter Soldier. The reading I like best is not that Ironwood is Winter's Jacques 2.0, nor that he groomed her; but that he was an important father figure in her life. Protective and caring, who tried to help her escape with what he knew. I don't see James recruiting Winter as a way to gain a strong ally. But rather that Winter wanted to detach herself from her family name, and make something worthwhile of herself all on her own. And that the military is what Ironwood knows and understand, so naturally it's a career he'd see as a good path. Just like Winter then proposed it to Weiss. I like to think they care about each other a LOT and they're their own tight family in between the lines, even if professionalism might throw a wrench into it. For short I love them together but not romantically please =)

I don't know if there's a ship name for this, but Salem x James Ironwood would be a big nope from me too... In general, let's just assume I ship Salem with nobody because abuse.

My fav & least fav platonic relationship(s) for the character

Fav platonic relationship would be (have been because we dont talk about V8?) with Winter. Fooor the reasons I've explained above I suppose x) I (again) love the trust they had in one another and the quiet support.

There was also his relationship with Oscar that I really liked during V7, although it has been soured a bit by the (valid) reading from some people that Ironwood sought out Ozpin a lot through Oscar, and given his identity issues it is not ground for a greatly healthy relationship. Their interactions were still very intersting though ♡ I consider Oscar to be the kid who went at trying to appease James' fear or make him reconsider his decisions the best way. There was true understanding and hope for a working relationship here. I do feel that Oscar put in more work than James however (emotionally) and I wish there had been pay-back instead of a gunshot.

For my least fav relationship ? Probably Robyn or Watts ? Robyn was always very antagonistic toward Ironwood since their priorities are so different. And I overall just don't really like her after V7 so there are very few relationships with her I'm interested in (the exception is her ship with Fiona I think it's cute). Meanwhile, Watts is just a petty asshole hell bent on ruining Ironwood because he didn't pick his project. I'm not very interested in hate relationships, and since theirs wasn't deeply explored anyway, it's even more the case here. Their fight was great though, one of my favorite RWBY fights !

My favorite thing about the character

Well this was completely proven wrong by V8 buuut as of V7 I liked that he was a deconstruction of the military general (dictator) trope. Sooo you can guess how i feel about V8 X) In general among RWBY, several of my fav are fav BECAUSE they look like one trope but also have key differences that from the get go make the character stray away from said trope. For example I'm not a fan of the princess tsundere archetype at all, but I loooved Weiss in V1 BECAUSE she was extra-willing to listen and change her mind, and you could very easily tell that it was her upbringing speaking more than herself in most occasions.

Similarly, I wasn't a big fan of Ironwood before V7. I didn't hate him you know and he wasn't lower than most characters in my Tier list but I also didn't particularly care. But you know what ? I've aaaalways had a really soft spot for the "angsty angry traumatized teen". And RWBY made the mistake of extending that soft spot to "tired adults trying their best" (only to repeatedly beat them up/make them villains after making me care about them but what can you do uh)

Soo in general, I loved that Ironwood was trying so hard. I loved that he was tired and in over his head but learning and listening and trying to do good and be better despite his fears. I liked that he told his entourage about Salem and was loyal. I liked that he cared about helping the people above his own image and the way people perceived him. I liked that you could tell this was a terrible situation all around, and his decisions WERE questionnable but we could SEE that he meant WELL and was genuinely trying so hard despite how scared and tired he was.

My biggest criticism for the character

Well this won't be a surprise but in general I just wished he had stayed a morally grey character we were allowed to feel for instead of a cartoon black villain. I didn't need James to be THE Hero or anything like this despite some accusations levelled at those who like him. Him becoming one of RWBY's antagonist is honestly fine by me ! It is interesting. But I'd have preferred they kept him ambiguous and trying in his own way. (And smart because V8 Ironwood was dumb af)

I can be a tad overprotective of his character since he's just... so despised, so I think that I have inadvertently distanced myself from any of his flaws... somehow like "people are already yelling all of them so I don't need to add to this shit show" you know ? skjfkd But I KNOW he has them and it would still have been good to develop his flaws, just... not like that

But yea I'd have liked it if V8 Ironwood DID diverge from RWBYJNORQ and became an antagonist but not an iredeemable villain. LIKE,, we redeemed Hazel and Emerald and IRONWOOD is where the writers draw the line by saying "nope this one is rotten" ?? What ?

When was their writing at the peak according to me (ex : best season)

V7 definitely ! Ironwood carried V7 so hard haha. His character was fleshed out and given nuance and made to struggle and evolve and I loved him in that volume.

A song I think fits them & why

Hunger • Monsters & Men Human • Rag'n'Bone Man Way down we go • Kaleo Beekeeper • Keaton Henson Thistle and weeds • Mumford and Sons Castle of Glass • Linkin Park It's all so incredibly loud • Glass Animals

A headcanon to make up about them

His metal parts impact his metabolism so Ironwood is terrible at holding his alcohool and very little manages to knock him out. He's a workaholic. His low tolerence for alcohool is a great tool whn friends need to put him to sleep.

His joints crack and hurt in the cold, his metal parts as well and they are an hassle in the sand. James like to keep his room temperature warmer than the average atlasian because of this, otherwise he has to spend 30 min every morning simply unwiding muscles to move around efficiently.

He's not a good singer but has a nice low voice for telling stories. If he had kids, he'd probably avoid lullabies but compensate with bedtimes stories.

What I would change about them if I was making a re-write

As always, I'm kind of reflecting along the way as I write this, and one thing I'm thinking right now is... Doesn't it take away from the atlas arc message ITSELF to just pile up so many "standard bad guy" stuff on Ironwood ? Like, I wanna ask... why do we hate him ? Is he an antagonist because he lets fear get the best of him ? Because he's a classist who doesn't care about Mantle like some fans argue ? Because he's too stubborn and wants to be THE hero ? Because he doesn't listen to others ? Because he abandonned Mantle ? Because he kills peopke left and right ? Because he wanted to bomb a city ? I think you might see where I'm going with this : his status as villain is kind of messy. V8 just kept piling-up flaws and villainous actions onto Ironwood with no concern for whether this was a lenght he would go to (using the certainty that he would go to any lenghts to enact his plans), ,or whether these were one of the initial flaws/failings that led to his "fall" as an antagonist. What lesson is Ironwood supposed to learn ? Personally the very first time I yelled at my screen "No ! Why would the writers choose that ?" is when Ironwood shot Oscar. When answering criticism against medias, many people tend to look at it only through the lense of "well it makes sense in universe" or as if there were no other ways for the story to devolve. But at the end of the way, everything in a story is a choice from the writer even if it is influenced by the characters' personnalities. If I took the scene where Ironwood shoots Oscar, someone might tell me "he's crippled by his PTSD, he COULD do this." Maybe, that's a reading I can somewhat understand at least. But the writers have the power to NOT put his character in such a position. When I saw the wreck that was V7 finale, I ranted to my bestfriend about it and at no point did i say "why did Ironwood do that", I said "why did the writers make him shoot Oscar, the only point narratively would be to make irredeemable" Aaaand that's what they went for and I obviously didn't care for it. So if I had to rewrite it; I would have kept Ironwood's "mistakes" more focused. If he's wrong because he wants to abandon Mantle, because he's (understandably) scared and doesn't want to take risks; then stay focused on that. It's what makes RWBY leave, and out of all his V8 actions that's really the only thing RWBY needed to tell the whole world he wasn't an ally anymore apparently. - Don't make him shoot Oscar point blank, instead Oscar can simply fall because he flinches away from Ironwood's outburst; and a distraught/guilty Ironwood can decide that he doesn't have the time or capacity to help because of the tense situation. (Killing and not saving someone don't hold the same moral weight at all). - Don't make him kill people left and right or bomb cities, maintain the flaw of Ironwood struggling with his PTSD and his fear and not being able to take risks. - Don't paint him as a black villain, and eventually write V8 in such a way that RWBYJNORQ show taking risks might lead to a bigger victory, which was the volume's theme anyway. For example, following Oscar's destruction of the whale, a growth can occur that would bring back together the two anti-Salem factions : Oscar's risk put Atlas out of harm's way, which leads to Ironwood seeing that maybe there WAS a way to save Mantle as well as Atlas despite Salem's presence and he might have jumped the gun too quickly because of his fears. I'm not sure, I haven't thought about this extensively honestly but I hope you see what I mean. I think it would have been more focused & more in-character to focus Ironwood's failings on his fear; and the fact that he cares for the people and the greater good sometimes at the cost of the individuals. The idea that by sacrificing individuals too much you forget the people you're fighting for in the first place, could have been interesting to dig deeper into. Keep to the idea that Ironwood is somewhat disensitized to the individuals suffering for the sake of the greater good, instead of making him just

callous & uncaring.

My guess for their MBTI/Enneagram

I think pre-V8 Ironwood was an unconventionnal ENFJ. Aka, the type of character no one would type ENFJ because they go by stereotypes and Fe stereotypes are just enneagram 2 everywhere (aka nice, kind, helpful) whereas Ironwood has an enneagram tritype very common among xxTJs so that's what he looks/behaves like, but the way he thinks (what's best for the people, ethical values derived from an Atlasian upbringing) align more with Fe cognitively I think I'm going with ENFJ 6w5 1w2 3w4

Starting from V8 though, Ironwood veered clearly into ENTJ territory (types aren't supposed to change but I wouldn't say RWBY is the most consistent media when it comes to characters' personnalities)

One aspect that I think would be nice to delve deeper into ?

I understand why they didn't care to, but it'd have been interesting to get a few backstory hints for Ironwood. How did he lose half his body ? How did Oz recruit him ? Or some pieces about his upbringing ?

[jackcinephile]

LO Fans: "I love Lore Olympus because it deals with serious themes, like sexual assault, abuse, gaslighting, trauma, and mental health issues!"

Me, who spent my life discovering and obsessing over masterpieces like this:

"You're gonna have to try a lot harder than that to impress me."

Yeah, I never understood that kind of praise. For one thing, people act like LO is groundbreaking for that reason, despite there being countless movies, books, tv shows, comics, and video games that also deal with the same themes. That isn't to say there can't be more stories like this, however. I, for one, am begging for another video game that comes close to the emotional resonance of Silent Hill 2, or for a faithful adaptation of Dracula and/or Phantom of the Opera, or for a horror movie as unsettling as The Howling! But to say any new story that deals with these themes is unique for doing so, is just simply not true. Lore Olympus is no more unique than any of these stories. Also, I don't understand the praise that Lore Olympus is great just by virtue of having these themes in the first place. Just because a story has serious themes, doesn't automatically make it good. Far too often does LO use its themes as a crutch for a plot that is standard issue among romances, as opposed to stories like The Howling, which has a very intriguing, outlandish plot that serves as a catalyst to explore themes of very real and relatable horror. Lore Olympus, without its intense themes, is just another story about the CEO falling in love with his intern. And don't get me wrong, I LOVE those kinds of stories, but Lore Olympus just doesn't really do it for me. And the poorly executed themes just hamper it even further for me.

If it wasn't already apparent, has anyone noticed a pattern between these titles? All but one are horror stories. In my opinion, that is one of the key differences between them and LO: Horror! The themes within, are ones that illicit terror, and the stories reflect that (even Phantom of the Opera--don't listen to anyone who says it's a romance). Starting with Dracula, one of the scenes that horrified me the most in the book was the one where Count Dracula sneaks into Mina's bedroom. The book describes him slitting open his own vein and forcing her to drink his blood. Mina then expresses feelings of violation, much akin to what rape survivors feel. It doesn't pull any punches in its shocking, horrific portrayal, but it never comes off as exploitative. That's because the best horror stories rely on the audience's empathy. In this case, nobody wants to feel violated, so we feel as horrified as the characters do when we read about this grotesque event. And because it is about illiciting fear through empathy, Dracula succeeds where Lore Olympus fails. Lore Olympus, before all else, is a romance. And rape should not be in a romantic story. Especially not when the narrative of LO uses this trauma to validate the relationship between the two leads. I'm not a fan of stories that use trauma to validate a relationship between romantic interests, and I think that partly stems from reading the Phantom of the Opera.

If you ask me, Phantom of the Opera is one if the best books to discuss abuse and gaslighting ever written! Despite misconceptions generated by the popularity of the musical, PotO is very much a horror story with hardly any romance at all. And it's one of the best examples about why using trauma to validate a romance is a very bad idea! You see, all the conflict of the story begins with The Phantom and his trauma. He was born with multiple physical deformities that cause him to look like a living corpse. Because of this, he is despised and rejected by the world in order to escape the hatred of the world, he commissions the construction of the Paris Opera House, complete with intricate catacombs where he can live out the rest of his miserable days. Then one day, a woman named Christine comes to work at the Opera as a chorus girl. She is sad and alone due to her being orphaned, without a friend in the world. She too is emotionally damaged and the Phantom thinks this means she'll understand him. The trouble begins instantly when he claims to be a character from a folktale that Christine's father used to tell her. This is when the manipulation and gaslighting begins. Part of what makes this so effective is how we see it from an outside perspective. The protagonist, Raoul, is in love with Christine and we get to see his confusion and growing concern when he starts realizing Christine is showing signs of an abusive relationship. What makes the relationship even worse is the fact that Christine actually does understand The Phantom. So she doesn't run away not only out of fear, but also compassion. She knows what it's like to feel isolated and dead to the world and The Phantom uses that against her. The more I describe this, the more parallels I begin to see to Hades' and Minthe's relationship. Yes, Minthe abused Hades in much of the same way as The Phantom abused Christine. Notice how Minthe keeps convincing Hades that they're the only people who understand each other, even going so far as to say, "We're the same." The funny thing is, that's exactly what the narrative uses to validate Hades' and Persephone's relationship! It tries to establish that Hades and Persephone relate to each other and they say, several times, "We're the same," to each other. But this is exactly how Hades got stuck in a toxic relationship with Minthe, so why is it suddenly okay now? Relationships that use shared trauma to validate themselves are almost always doomed to become toxic, in one way or another.

So what about the healthy relationship in Phantom of the Opera? Well, it's kinda interesting actually. You see, Christine eventually comes to realize that she needs help, so she turns to the protagonist, Raoul, to get her away from the Phantom. Raoul has an interesting character arc because he starts the novel being pretty immature and kinda selfish. He doesn't really take Christine's feelings into consideration. It's more like a boy chasing his childhood crush (actually that's exactly what happens). However, over the course of the story, as he becomes increasingly concerned with her well-being, he learns to care more about her feelings and her needs. This culminates in the climax, when he's willing to crawl through hell itself for her sake. I bring all this up because I wanted to compare Raoul with Hades as well. Hades is a very consistent character. He doesn't need an arc like Raoul because, from the very beginning, he's willing to put all of Persephone's needs before his, to a fault! That is his entire purpose within the narrative of LO. He exists to serve Persephone. Raoul didn't exist to serve Christine. He had his own journey of growing and maturing. And Christine didn't exist to serve Raoul either. It bothers me that a novel from 1910 has a more well-rounded relationship than a modern comic! Actually, now that I think about it, isn't Persephone's entire character arc supposed to be her learning that she shouldn't exist to serve others? Well, that totally contradicts Hades' role in the story, doesn't it? He exists to serve her! I guess, in the eyes of LO, it's only okay if men serve women, but not for women to serve men. Newsflash: neither is okay.

Now Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde (1931) remains, to this day, one of the most terrifying movies I've ever seen! That's all thanks to its brutal depictions of domestic abuse. So Dr. Henry Jekyll believes the solution to enlightening the human race is to separate the good and evil in our souls. He solves this problem by creating a drug to do just that, which transforms him into Edward Hyde, but he becomes addicted and starts terrorizing a woman who was once a former patient of his. I think what makes this so effective, when compared to LO, is one simple factor: Fear. I am terrified of Edward Hyde, but whenever Apollo shows up, I'm just annoyed. That's because Hyde isn't being used to sell an agenda, while Apoll is. Apollo is all about making a statement about toxic masculinity, which always bothered me from the very beginning! Being an abusive cunt who rapes women has nothing to do with masculinity! It doesn't matter if you're masculine or feminine, anyone can be a cunting abusive rapist. If you are a rapist, it's because you're a monster who lacks empathy, not because of masculinity. And if you think masculinity has something to do with a lack of empathy, fuck off! Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is not about toxic masculinity. It's about how drug addiction can often hurt other people around us just as much, if not moreso, than ourselves. It also doesn't use rape to validate a relationship between characters. I'm sorry, but that is just the laziest storytelling technique. When the antagonist is a rapist OF COURSE the male love interest is going to look better by comparison! But when you take Apollo out of the equation, Hades stops looking like a desirable love interest real fucking quick.

So yeah, I think Hades makes for a bad love interest. That's mostly because he's so much like Shinji Ikari from Neon Genesis Evangelion. Yeah, the one title from the list above that's not a horror, but is no less relevant. The thing is, both Hades and Shinji have a lot in common, such as hating themselves, having a bad relationship with their father, and not caring at all about their own wants and needs. Oh, also Asuka's a better written character than Minthe, but that's a whole other topic. What makes Evangelion work, in my opinion, is that Shinji's whole journey is about learning to love himself, while Hades is portrayed as being perfect the way he is. Hades in LO is like a flawless beacon of virtue, solely because he worships the ground Persephone walks on. But the guy just doesn't care about himself at all! Like I said earlier, Hades guilty of the same self-destructive behaviors as Persephone but he's praised for it, while Persephone is encouraged to look after herself more often. Compare this to Shinji, whose life only gets worse the more he neglects himself. The only time Hades does something beneficial for himself is when he breaks up with Minthe, but immediately after that, he starts devoting every ounce of energy to Persephone! All that matters is her! He doesn't give a single fuck about himself. Sorry, but that's not good qualities in a male love interest. In all fairness, this is a problem with the romance genre as a whole. Most romances give priority to the protagonist (in this case Persephone) while neglecting the love interest (Hades). It's why I have a serious problem with the entire genre.

Now what could Silent Hill 2 have that is in any way relevant to Lore Olympus? Two words: Nightmare Fuel. Personifying trauma as literal demons is one of the smartest ideas anyone's ever had, because speaking from personal experience, that's how it feels. I just don't feel like the trauma experienced by the characters in LO is a waking nightmare like it is in real life. For one, the characters' trauma only pops up when it's convenient for the plot. Like whenever Persephone starts experiencing ptsd, it happens when she's with Hades so we can get a scene with Hades cuddling her. After that, it shows up in a scene to make her look badass by confronting Apollo. No, just no. The Howling did it better too, by making the protagonist's trauma such an inconvenience in her life! I never felt that way in LO. When you uss traumatic encounters to make your character look like a badass, kindly fuck off.

[lesbianrobin]

hey guys it's me again back on my bullshit <3 wanna hear my theory about how tommy created king steve? warning it’s like 2800 words long okay let's go!

So, at first glance in S1, the Steve and Tommy dynamic seems somewhat obvious: King Steve and his loyal sidekick. This post is me arguing that the only reason we really have this perception is because Steve is the more attractive of the pair (no hate to Chester Rushing, he’s very cute, but. Joe Keery) and because Tommy himself encouraged it. Tommy was actually the more “dominant” partner in the duo. I believe that it was Tommy who encouraged Steve to lean into the “King Steve” persona and who encouraged belief in this persona among their classmates, all for his own benefit.

Before we can really get into it, I have to establish something about Steve’s character, specifically that he bases his self-worth and self-image almost entirely on what others say and think about him. I’m basing this assumption off of a few key moments in the series, but I don’t want this to be insanely long so I’ll try to focus on season two where this trait is most evident.

At the Halloween party, Nancy tells Steve that they killed Barb and that their “love” is bullshit, and then later outside of the gym she insists that he isn’t being fair or reasonable in his anger with her. The next day Steve shows up to her house with roses, rehearsing an apology (”I’m sorry... what am I sorry for?) even though he doesn’t feel that he’s done anything wrong. That’s important: apologizing even though he doesn’t actually believe or understand his feelings and actions to be wrong. He’s trusting Nancy’s perception that he’s been unreasonable above his own hurt feelings and his own perception that he’s done nothing he needs to apologize for. Then, at the end of the season, he tells Nancy that he may have been a shitty boyfriend, but he’s a pretty damn good babysitter. 

Sometime between going to the Wheelers’ house with flowers to apologize and talking to Nancy at the Byers’, Steve did a pretty serious 180 from “What the hell am I sorry for, what did I even do wrong” to “I was a shitty boyfriend and you should go be with Jonathan.” The last time he interacted with Nancy was prior to the flower incident, so what happened to cause this shift in perspective? I’d like to suggest... that nothing happened! 

See, Steve is on a pretty linear emotional path in S2 after the Halloween party. At first, he’s so upset that he can’t even look at Nancy, asking Jonathan to take her home. The next day he avoids her until she confronts him, at which point he’s rather confident in his own feelings that Nancy has hurt him and doesn’t love him like she should. As time goes on, though, he loses confidence in his feelings. He buys her flowers to apologize. He isn’t remotely angry with Nancy or Jonathan once they show up together and it’s pretty clear that something’s going on between them. Finally, he calls himself a shitty boyfriend. I think that the more time passes, the less Steve believes in himself, and the more he tends to default to believing others despite his own feelings. As the anger fades, he questions himself, and since he loves and trusts Nancy, he’s inclined to believe her! Since she doesn’t love him, he must have done something wrong. Because Nancy doesn’t love him, because she wants Jonathan, because their relationship was “bullshit,” he now believes he must have been a shitty boyfriend.

Sidenote, in S3 he says a lot of shit about how he’s a loser with no future, and the way he says it indicates (to me) that it’s something he hears quite often, likely from his father. Even though it’s pretty normal to be working minimum wage the summer after you graduate high school and not have things figured out yet, even though he’s literally helped save his friends’ lives, perhaps even helped save the whole town, Steve has internalized the idea that he’s a total failure at the ripe old age of 18 (19?) and I can’t help but think that it’s because his father has told him. So. Also in S3, he says his hair is his greatest feature, and apparently people literally call him Steve “the Hair” Harrington so like, maybe he just knows he has really good hair, but he ALSO might be responding to the nickname by saying like, “Oh, okay, the hair is Objectively my best feature, okay.” Just a little bit of speculation!

I know this is a lot of my own personal opinions and speculation, but if you can get behind it, let’s keep going! If Steve is someone whose every belief about himself is a direct response to the words and feelings of those around him, if he places the opinions of others above his own feelings, it would logically follow that he might be easily emotionally manipulated.

So, let’s apply this lens to his friendship with Tommy!

Let’s run down the list. Steve cleans up after Tommy, making excuses for his shitty behavior, even wordlessly giving Carol his own food at lunch after Tommy ruined hers. He allows Tommy and Carol to have sex in his mom’s bed, and as indicated by their familiarity with the bedroom and knowledge of where the spare sheets are, this is a regular occurrence. He’s also always seen driving the two of them around. 

Neither Tommy nor Carol is ever really seen doing anything kind for Steve. They tease his girlfriend, then later use his heartbreak as an excuse to graffiti some shit and make cruel jokes about Nancy and Jonathan. That’s just not the behavior of a couple hangers-on to the most popular kid in school! Neither of them ever even pretend to give a shit about Steve. It seems that Tommy and Carol were very comfortable using Steve for his big empty house and his nice car and his popularity at school because they’d been using him for years at that point, and they thought there was no way he’d ever ditch them.

I think it’s generally accepted among fans that Steve and Tommy have been close friends for years. Tommy’s familiar with Steve’s father’s infidelity, and is comfortable enough to joke and laugh about it with Steve. The two of them just... operate like people who’ve existed around each other for a long time. So, if we accept that Steve and Tommy have been friends for awhile, we can then accept three things: the two of them know each other very well, Tommy is used to having fun at Steve’s expense, and Steve is used to allowing it.

When Steve does finally stand up to Tommy and Carol, Tommy turns on him immediately. It’s an incredibly fast turn. He shoves Steve up against his car, physically threatens him, and proceeds to taunt him angrily even as he’s driving away. Specifically he yells, “That’s it, run away Stevie boy, run away! Just like you always do,” and continues to shout variations on this phrase even after Steve’s driven far enough that Tommy’s only yelling to himself. The fact that Tommy keeps shouting after Steve can’t hear him indicates that he is genuinely very upset by Steve’s standing up against him and Carol. His fury, however, as indicated by the speed with which he turned on Steve, seems to be less like that of one who feels betrayed by a friend and more like one angry at some perceived loss or threat. 

Now, let me just state the obvious: that was a really weird thing for Tommy to be yelling!

There’s no real precedent at this point (or any time) in the show for Steve “running away,” unless you count him running from the cops, which... Tommy also did, and which also happened, like, ten minutes ago, which I don’t think would really qualify for the wording “like you always do.” Tommy also suddenly calls him “Stevie boy,” which (correct me if I’m wrong) nobody has called Steve thus far. Maybe he’s just trying to mock and belittle Steve in any way he can think of, but it’s just... weirdly specific. The whole thing is a bit of a non-sequitur.

But! Remember how we established that Steve and Tommy, by virtue of having been friends for a significant period of time, know each other pretty well? Remember how Tommy is knowledgeable about Steve’s father’s infidelity, so familiar that he’s comfortable joking about it? Keep that in mind.

This phrase that Tommy shouts at Steve only makes sense in the context of some offscreen information that we the viewer are not privy to, but which Tommy and Steve are. What might that information be? Nothing in the show indicates that Steve has a history of picking fights prior to the incident with Jonathan. He’s a fairly respectable suburban kid, what is Tommy accusing him of running from? It’s my opinion that the only logical answer is that Tommy’s referencing a specific event with Steve’s “asshole” father, or a specific phrase that Steve has perhaps often heard from his father. I’m gonna ask you to sit on this assumption for a minute, and I’ll come back and support it soon.

Okay, so that’s S1 out of the way. At this point, a few things are clear: Steve has issues with his dad. Tommy knows about those issues. Steve allowed himself to be used by Tommy and Carol for some indeterminate yet significant amount of time before finally snapping and dumping them completely, something which infuriates Tommy.

Tommy is also in S2! And... all he does is tell Steve that Nancy and Jonathan are skipping school together. He never actually interacts with Nancy or Jonathan; he shows up in S2 entirely to mock Steve, to use his deepest fears and insecurities against him. 

First thing: in the S2 shower scene after basketball practice, Tommy makes it a point to shove Jonathan and Nancy’s relationship in Steve’s face. Billy doesn’t know Steve, so he attacks his basketball skills and his keg stand record, but Tommy? Tommy knows about Steve’s dad cheating on his mom, he was there for the S1 fistfight, he knows how monumental infidelity is to Steve, especially in the case of Nancy and Jonathan, and so that is what he chooses to torment Steve with, and it clearly strikes a nerve. 

Now’s where I circle back to my assertion that Tommy was referencing/quoting Steve’s father while yelling at him back in S1. S2 makes it clear that Tommy  knows Steve’s biggest insecurities, and he intentionally exploits them for his own purposes. This, combined with the way Tommy demonstrates intimate knowledge of Steve’s family situation and the fact that his words just don’t quite make sense in context, the fact that “Stevie boy” sounds like something a father may call his young son, makes me believe that at some point, Steve told Tommy about something his dad said that hurt him, and Tommy remembered that to use against him later. 

This paragraph is just speculation on what Tommy might be referring to, so skip if you want, it’s entirely my own opinion. We know that Steve’s parents sleep in separate bedrooms and his father can’t be trusted not to cheat, and thus we might assume that they argue a lot. Maybe his parents get into lots of arguments, and whenever Steve chooses to remove himself from the situation, he’s accused of running away. Maybe Steve runs off whenever he gets in trouble with his father. There’s a lot of possibilities, but either way, “run away, Stevie boy, run away just like you always do” just... sounds too personal and specific to be something random and meaningless that Tommy came up with on the spot.

Now, in S2, Tommy also appears to have latched onto Billy rather quickly after Billy’s arrival in town. Coincidentally, Billy is kind of obsessed with Steve and taking him down, despite the fact that Steve never sought him out or challenged him in any way. Steve has been minding his own business! When they later end up in a fistfight, Billy says that he’s “been dying to meet this King Steve” that people have been telling him about, and I can’t help but think... who would make it their priority to talk to Billy about Steve Harrington? Like, new guy from California moves to my small Indiana town, I don’t want to tell him about some popular guy at school who’s gotten kinda lame and quiet lately, I want to ask him about himself, or tell him what we do for fun around here, right? So who might be incentivized to talk Steve up to a guy who’s clearly itching for a fight, a guy dying to prove that he’s top dog? Who did we see hanging out with Billy a couple of times?

Did you say Tommy? Because it’s Tommy! It certainly seems to me as though Tommy saw an opportunity in Billy. The opportunity to befriend someone with a certain social power (much like with Steve), but also the opportunity to torment or get back at Steve in some way. I think that Tommy intentionally inflated the character of “King Steve” to Billy in the hopes that Billy would pick a fight with Steve and Steve would get his ass kicked without Tommy having to get his hands dirty.

Which makes me wonder... what if Tommy played up that King Steve image to people besides Billy? Other kids at Hawkins High... or perhaps Steve himself. Remember how Steve internalizes things? Believes that he must be whatever others see in him? Yeah.

Let’s say you’re an asshole teenage boy who wants it all. You want to be popular. You want to have a spot to hang out with your girlfriend with no parents around. You want to feel strong and powerful. You meet a kid who could give you all of that, and all he wants in return is friendship. He doesn’t even seem to care if that friendship is genuine or not! All you have to do is hang around and make him feel like a cool kid. Convince him to throw a small party, you and your girlfriend get free reign of his nice big house. Make sure he knows that he’s got Prom King potential, that he’s the top dog, and you get to be one of the popular guys, too. It’s a pretty sweet deal if you can recognize the opportunity for what it is.

One last thing: Actual Steve is nothing like he seems around Tommy and Carol in the start of S1. Making friends with Dustin and coming up with a goofy handshake, singing to cheer Robin up in S3, singing into the bat to try and cheer Nancy up in S1, holding her hand during their first time, unabashedly telling her she’s beautiful and that he missed her even if only an hour had passed... Steve is a very emotional, dorky guy, and we never really got to see that side of him when he was around Tommy. I just find that interesting in light of the fact that Steve and Tommy seem to be otherwise rather close. Steve was clearly playing a part to some degree while around them, and in S3 he explicitly says that he behaved the way he did in high school because he was concerned about what others would think of him, about losing his popularity. Even prior to their argument, Steve was wary around Tommy, concerned about losing his friendship despite the fact that Tommy was a pretty objectively shitty friend.

So, here’s what we know. Tommy knows a lot about Steve, including his private family issues, and he isn’t above using that knowledge to hurt or manipulate Steve. In fact, he seems to be really good at it. Tommy benefitted from Steve’s popularity, from him throwing parties and living up to the “King Steve” image. Steve followed Tommy’s lead in their friendship, cleaned up after him, made excuses for him, and let him get away with just about anything. He masked aspects of his personality that didn’t fit the image that he and Tommy aimed for. He was desperate to retain Tommy’s friendship and afraid of letting the mask fall. Tommy was furious when Steve rejected him, taunted Steve with deeply personal jabs, and a year later he latched onto the new “top dog” in town with record speed. Steve is a completely different person when he’s around Tommy versus when he’s around Nancy, Robin, and the kids. Most importantly, we know that Steve has a tendency to construct himself in the image provided by others. 

Taking all of this into account, I think that Tommy Hagan met sad, rich, handsome little Steve Harrington, saw just how lonely and desperate he was to feel a sense of belonging, and used that to nudge Steve into striving to be the person that Tommy wanted him to be: King Steve. 

[night-unfurls-its-splendour]

The Critique of Manners, Part II

~Or~

A Candid Review of ITV's Emma (1997)

Disclaimer: I do know that both this and the Miramax version were released in 1996, but to avoid confusion, I refer to this one as the “1997 Emma” in reference to the US release date.

The bones of this review were written some six years ago after my initial viewing. I’ve watched it three or four times since then, two very recently (Within the past year). I’d started to soften on it in the most recent watch. So many people love it so much I thought surely maybe I’m just crazy or even wrong; until I found this blog post from 2008 (a year before my favorite version was released) that hit on almost EVERY SINGLE thing that skeeved me out about this version when I first watched it.

Like my previous review of Emma. (2020), I’ll be covering the cast and overall handling of the script in comparison with what I know from reading the book. I will also be commenting on my thoughts about the costumes (Whether they are attractive or accurate, or both, or neither) which will be a bit more in depth than it was for the 2020 version, and this will set a pattern for the costumes section going forward.

Directed by Diarmuid Lawrence with screenwriting by Andrew Davies (Or should I say “Written by Andrew Davies with direction by Diarmuid Lawrence”?), this version was  a fan-favorite among Janeites for many years for … well, reasons I’ve never been entirely certain of. I’ve read the book twice through and referenced pertinent passages MANY times besides, and really I don’t see what they’re raving about.

Let’s dive in.

Cast & Characterization

I’d known about this adaptation for a while, but I held off on watching it, largely for one reason: my apprehension about Mark Strong playing Mr. Knightley.

     I was concerned because when I watched this I had already seen Mark Strong as Sir John Conroy in The Young Victoria and as Lord Blackwood in Sherlock Holmes, both very unpleasant characters. But there have been several occasions when I expressed displeasure with casting choices only to eat my words when I actually watched the movie. So I entered into watching this with an optimistic outlook, sure that Mark and Kate would surprise me with brilliant performances. And I would like to say that they did, but that would be an untruth.

My biggest fear about Mark Strong playing Mr. Knightley was that his rebuking of Emma was going to be a watered down version of ‘RAAAWWWRRR’ that I was familiar with, specifically because of The Young Victoria. It’s very hard for me to see Mark Strong point his finger in Emily Blunt’s face and shout at her, and then watch him do the same thing with Kate Beckinsale (only somewhat less aggressively) and expect to feel all warm and fuzzy about their romance. I expected that to be a tall order. And it was. Whenever he raises his voice, the right side of his face pulls up into a snarl. Now since it does this no matter what role he’s playing I’m guessing that’s just how his face is. It’s not his fault really and it’s almost certainly unintentional, but I’ve seen that snarl before and it does NOT belong on Mr. Knightley’s face.

   Don’t ever think I don’t LOVE Kate Beckinsale, and I don’t necessarily think that my problems with this interpretation of Emma are her fault; these things very rarely fall on the shoulders of the actual actors, but those of the screenwriters and directors who guide them. However – and I am aware that this might sound a bit harsh – I would say that at points, Kate Beckinsale’s performance in this movie (In my opinion) barely outstrips community theatre or even very good high school drama club level acting. It seems to me that there’s burden on her here to sound historical or period. This lends to this interpretation of Emma feeling at once both cold and childish (more on that later.)

Her best moments are when she runs into Jane as Jane is leaving Donwell and when she speaks with Robert Martin at the end of the film. I always like scenes where Emma tacitly apologizes to Mr. Martin, and her feeling when she invites him to Donwell is Kate’s finest moment in this movie.

I found Raymond Coulthard’s Frank Churchill insignificant at first, but on repeat viewings I really started to hate him. I don’t think Austen intended Frank’s caddishness (to use more modern vernacular I’d say he’s an utter “Douche”) to be quite this obvious on first glance. He’s a creep in this version and Raymond Coulthard is just not at all attractive to me, from his big nose to his little shark teeth.

Olivia Williams was a good, even great, Jane Fairfax, and in my opinion does a much better job of portraying Jane’s vexation than, say, Polly Walker did (more on that next time), while still quietly looking like she’d like to arm-bar Frank rather than take his vulgar teasing lying down.

She also has the distinction of being the only Jane Fairfax who’s singing REALLY blows Emma’s out of the water, and I like that all of the songs she sings are in languages other than English (primarily Italian I think?). This achieves the double whammy of showing how much more accomplished she is than Emma by emphasizing that not only does Jane sing and play better, but she knows languages too.

Samantha Morton is a superb actress whom I love and I was sort of appalled at how she looks in this movie. Is she dying of a wasting illness? She looks like a gust of wind will carry her away, although since she looked the same in the 1997 Jane Eyre (In which she played the title role under similarly appalling direction) perhaps that was just her look that year?

Dominic Rowan, as Mr. Elton, is… there’s a perfect word to describe it and I just can’t think of it right now. Like every other young man in this movie (other than Robert Martin) he’s got this feeling of skeeviness to me but it’s more than that. It’s a dweebie-ness as well. This is so dissatisfactory to me because Mr. Elton is supposed to have every appearance of charm and agreeableness, with his only obvious fault being his over-eagerness to ingratiate himself to Emma and some rather vulgar locker-room type talk about marrying for fortune. He’s just so… (I’ve hit upon it now after some discussion with my sister) dingy. He looks less like a “very handsome young man” who “knows the value of a good income” and more like the kind of guy that scrubs up okay, but still you can tell from the rumple of his clothes and the pizzaroni odor wafting from him that he lives in his mom’s basement.

The shining star for me in this production was Alistair Petrie as Robert Martin. I love him as an actor and especially after watching him in Cranford, I think he was an excellent choice for Harriet’s Mr. Martin.

Davies wrote the character to be a little more romantic (Actually buying Anne Radcliffe’s The Romance of the Forest, where originally Mr. Martin was supposed to forget to – something Emma uses as a mark against him to prove how he will age into an “gross vulgar old farmer” who is “obsessed with profit and loss”.)

I especially like an inserted scene where Mr. Martin, working in his field, sees a distressed Jane Fairfax from afar as she is walking home (I think from Donwell). I thought it drew an interesting parallel between two emotionally wronged characters that otherwise would have no interaction.

What’s with Mrs. Elton (Lucy Robinson)? I don’t think nearly enough people question this. I’ve seen it explained away as her being from Bristol and trying to make herself sound more hoity-toity to hide the fact that she’s New Money. I’m not positive on what a Bristol accent sounds like (For that is where Augusta Hawkins is from) but… this sounds like an American trying to sound posh. At some points she almost sounds Texan. It’s all very confusing, because the actress is British.  

Prunella Scales lists among her achievements being an outstanding actress and comedienne, as well as bringing into the world Samuel West, one of my all time favourite British screen crushes. She's probably best known for her work on Fawlty Towers, so its interesting to see her range as much less inscrutable Miss Bates. Her performance is by the book, but so much more engaging than Constance Chapman's 1972 offering, although i find her perhaps a shade too placid. She lacks a certain nervousness that I associate with the character (for more information, see my previous review.)

As for Bernard Hepton as Mr. Woodhouse, I can only say I. Didn’t. Like. Him. I have every consciousness of this being a personal bias. I have seen him play too many insufferable characters in too many things to like him as Emma’s lovable if tiresome father. This isn’t a knock on him or his performance; his reaction to Mrs. Elton is some great subtle visual comedy, this is just a me thing.

Another one of the better characterizations, though a relatively small role, is John Knightley. Played by Guy Henry, he is shown to be a good father, and an “Gentleman-like man”, with just the right blend of good humor and caustic comments.

Sets & Surroundings

I’d never paid MUCH attention to or questioned the houses and interiors used for estates in Austen adaptations until the 2020 version of Emma used such ridiculously lavish houses for relatively provincial gentry it forced me to sit up and pay attention. I think the houses used in this version are mostly suitable.

The part of Donwell Abbey’s exterior is played by Sudeley Castle in Gloucestershire. The Key words for Donwell from the text are “rambling and irregular” and while perhaps not as big as the Former Claremont House (Which, it is believed, was Austen’s inspiration for Donwell Abbey) it definitely is a suitable architectural style and situation and furthermore, having been purchased in the 19th century by a glove manufacturer and having been up to that point left in a little bit of a state of disrepair, fits the “neglect of prospect” Austen describes as well. Its interiors are a cobble-work of the Great Hall at Broughton Castle (Oxfordshire), various rooms at Stanway House (Gloucestershire), and the Strawberry beds at Thame Park (Oxfordshire)

(Top, left – Sudeley Castle; Bottom left – Trafalgar Park; Right – Dorney Court)

Trafalgar Park in Wiltshire and its interiors (a minty sage-green drawing-room fitting in perfectly with the mint-chocolate – primarily chocolate – color palette of the production) played the role of the Woodhouse’s home, Hartfield. A typical Georgian style house in red brick, I believe is consistent with Austen’s description of a “well built, modern house”.

Dorney Court in Buckinghamshire was used for Randalls, Mr. Weston’s recently purchased estate. It’s a Tudor style red brick house and it looks pretty on the mark from the front facade, but I think it’s still too big for a “small estate” with only two guest rooms (Although there’s no panic about the snow in this version – perhaps because it’s already snowing when they set out.)

My biggest problem is the lighting of this movie. I understand natural lighting and I LOVE it when you can even it out – but it is so dark in the evening scenes that it adds to the colorlessness of an already colorless production.

Fashion

Oh Jenny Beavan. You are a well-respected costume designer with good reason. However, I know that most of these costumes are rentals, but why is every-fucking-thing in this movie a shade of brown, beige or green?

As you can see, a rich tapestry of brown and beige. And this isn’t selective. this is (just about) every day-wear outfit in the movie (barring repeats and a few exceptions that I’ll give mention to below.)

Emma’s outerwear is brought to you by Hershey’s Chocolate. Also I’m not certain but I think  that her light brown redingote is the same one as Elinor’s in the 1995 Sense and Sensibility? If anyone can confirm, drop it in the comments.

Perhaps the evening wear will be more colorful?

Barely – Mrs. Weston in a brownish orange; Mrs. John Knightley in an orange-ish brown; Emma gets a dark blue? Or is that just the wintery glow from the window on a dark green velvet? Green (either so dark it’s almost black, or washed-out mint) appears to be the only color Emma is allowed to wear other than brown or ivory/white. Even her gown for the Crown Inn Ball (upper right) is an underwhelming and rather dingy ivory. The champagne number she wears for Christmas at Randalls is not only lack-lustre, but also sports what I’m now calling a “Bridgerton Bust” (where the Empire waist comes up too high, with the seam apparently resting across her bust rather than under it.)

The pink frock (seen properly only from the back) on Mrs. Weston is as close to real color as a main character gets in this production, and can be recognized as one of Jane Bennet’s dresses from the previous year’s Pride and Prejudice.

Even Jane Fairfax doesn’t get a break. Rather than putting her in Jane Fairfax Blue ™ (honestly, Jane Fairfax being costumed in blue is so consistent at this point Crayola should just name a crayon in her honor - this is gonna come back in future reviews) she gets a black-green evening number with no trim at all, and a succession of what the Ladies over at Frock Flicks like to call the “Dumpy Regency Little White Dress”, or drab gray-blues.

Some of the background dancers in the Crown Inn Ball scene get to wear pink! Why not put Harriet in a nice pink frock for this scene?! Why is this so difficult?!

Strawberry picking at Donwell is the only time main characters are consistently wearing identifiable colors that aren’t brown or green: Mrs. Weston in pink, Miss Bates in (oddly the most colorful dress of them all) a nice refreshing lavender blue; Jane gets grey/blue and Mrs. Elton, a pastel mint. Harriet is also given a little break in Mrs. Elton’s introduction scene in a (very) pastel blue frock, while Emma sports white (with a trademark green shawl.)

So how about the...

Similarly dull. I almost screamed for joy when I saw that Frank’s jacket was actually blue, and a vibrant blue at that. (The red is too close to brown, I’m sorry.)

So yes, in short the costumes, while perfectly technically accurate (I didn’t get a lot of caps of them but the trousers sufficiently tight, not that I care to look), are drab as a peahen.

As always I’ll outsource any dancing critique by linking Tea With Cassiane on YouTube, since I find her insights on the approach to dancing in Austen adaptations just fascinating and I would like to share such witty and informed reviews.

The Andrew Davies of it All…

*Strong Opinions Ahead*

There are so many reasons why this adaptation isn’t for me. First of all the very idea of making Emma, one of Austen’s most socially complex works (certainly her most vivid) into a sparse 107 minutes is baffling to me. Perhaps I can understand if it’s a Theatrical release but this is a TV production. Why not at least make it a two part special?

And besides the issue that, in order to make this fit the time frame, the story is severely truncated, there’s… the Andrew Davies of it all.

I have some issues with Andrew Davies’ screenwriting for this adaptation particularly. A LOT of issues. Where does one start? I think Knightley is a good place.

It’s not just the casting I don’t like here; but it does say something to me that they chose Mark Strong for this role. It’s a casting decision I discovered with disbelief when I first saw clips from this version in a Period Drama men compilation video on YouTube. I mentioned above that I know Mark Strong as unpleasant characters with man-handling habits. That’s the kind of role Mark Strong is associated with because that’s just what he does well. And I think this played into the casting here, because Davies’ interpretation of Knightley is a bit… fierce. He shouts SO MUCH in this movie and in scenes like the Harriet Smith debacle (where Mr. Knightley of the book even gets a bit angry with Emma) I can understand this, perhaps. But in the book Mr. Knightley takes many pauses to collect and calm himself, because his goal is not to quarrel with Emma but to argue a point. 97 Knightley takes no such pauses and spends the whole scene in what some might call an escalating rage.

Knightley’s cheerful arrival to Hartfield to tell Emma that Robert Martin intended to propose to Harriet is cut out so we start right off with his indignant exclamation of “She refused him?!” and it’s all go from there. To make matters worse, Emma’s own arguments are crippled by Davies’ editing. Many of her more (what might even latterly be considered “feminist”) arguments are cut out. In fact once Knightley gets going, he juggernauts his way through all of his rebukes and speeches from the book, but Emma hardly gets a word in edgewise after arguing that Robert Martin is not Harriet’s equal. What Austen wrote as a heated debate is turned by Davies into a one-sided tirade. (By don’t take my word for it, watch the clip.)

The final cherry on top is having Emma, after Knightley leaves the room with the last word firmly in his grasp, childishly pout “You are wrong Mr. Knightley, and you will see you are wrong and then you will be sorry.” I half expected her to cross her arms and stomp her foot. Worth noting is the fact that Davies adds an additional “It was badly done. Emma,” in this scene where there was none in the book. Rather overkill to my mind. Is this his catchphrase?

At Box Hill, Davies has Knightley begin his climactic rebuke of Emma’s insulting behavior by grabbing her arm and hauling her aside, and concludes by leading her, still holding her arm, to the carriage. Well at least he doesn’t shout at her in this scene; but again, all but one of Emma’s responses are cut out and she stands there, pouting until Mr. Knightley leaves and then she bursts into tears.

When Mr. Knightly proposes to Emma I was feeling good about this scene, until he dropped the “I held you when you were three weeks old” line, and I immediately felt uncomfortable. Maybe you DON’T want mention how you held her when she was a baby after you asked her to MARRY you. But perhaps worse is Emma’s response to the line: “Do you like me as well now as you did then?”

Bringing up holding Emma when she was three weeks old at the proposal (A line which was not in the book) is bad enough but there seems to be a peculiar repeated emphasis on Knightley recalling Emma as a baby. He dragged it up previously when he and Emma make up after the Harriet debacle, as he holds John and Isabella’s baby daughter (whose name, I would mention, is Emma.) In this instance too, the line is a Davies addition.

Let’s talk about Knightley’s strawberry line.

This is delivered in voice-over as a transition to the strawberry picking party at Donwell, and is portrayed as a formal invitation: “Mr. Knightley invites you to taste his strawberries, which are ripening fast.”

At first I was confident that I was reading too much into this (but I think at this point I can safely say that I’m not). I can’t help bursting out laughing every time I hear that line. It was a questionable way to word that if you ask me, especially considering that this is (once again) NOT the line in the book, and it was NOT a formal invitation. It was said to Mrs. Elton and intended to be a joke.  

“You had better explore Donwell then,” replied Mr. Knightly “That may be done without horses. Come and eat the strawberries; they’re ripening fast.”

   ‘ If Mr. Knightly did not begin seriously, he was obliged to proceed so...’

   And here I thought Janeites hated adaptations that cut out “Miss Austen’s biting wit.”

To top it all off, we have Frank Churchill (Who I have already pointed out is a bit of a creep in this adaptation and even more detestable than he already was as Austen wrote him) praising Jane: this would be fine, if he wasn’t drooling into Emma’s ear about the turn of Jane’s throat, (He actually utters this line)

and how fine his dead aunt’s jewels will look against her skin. May I just be the first to say “Ehewhegaugh”.

I juxtapose this with the book where Frank's lines are almost exactly as Davies renders them, except Jane Austen never wrote the "have you ever seen such a skin?" Line. The difference i have highlighted in bold:

"... She is a complete angel. Look at her. Is she not an angel in every gesture? Observe the turn of her throat. Observe her eyes as she looks up at my father. --- You will be glad to hear that my uncle intends to give her all my aunt's jewels. They are to be new set. I am resolved to have some in an ornament for the head. Will it not be beautiful in her dark hair?"

Because talking about how pretty your fiancee's hair is, is normal and marginally less creepy than talking about what a fine skin she has or how lovely your (i cannot stress this part enough) dead aunt's jewels will look against it. Davies' script also makes no mention of having them reset, which makes me think he’s talking about the actual necklaces and bracelets Mrs. Churchill would have worn.

But hey, maybe its just a me thing.

Harriet Smith’s story suffers, primarily, I can with some candor admit, due to the time constraints. After Mr. Elton is married, we never see Harriet in any distress. It’s almost as though she’s forgotten all about it! Emma never has to appeal to her to exert herself or to move on. Perhaps this is better than Doran Godwin’s Emma gaslighting Harriet and manipulating her by constantly chastising her for… well general heartbreak (but that’s a bugaboo for a different review.)

My last complaint of note is that ludicrous harvest feast at the end of the movie. The whole concept of this scene just does not seem at all Janely to me. I was under the impression that I was meant to be watching an Austen. Not some bullshit Thomas Hardy knock-off. This is another Davies touch and I hate it more on the principal that it is one of his numerous, obsessive tweaks made solely to point out the existence of the lower classes.

If Davies wanted to show Mr. Knightley’s being an attentive landlord and gentleman farmer then I don’t see why he couldn’t just show Knightley actually running his farm?

“Okay’, you might say, “but I think the highlighting of the servants is to show how good Knightley is by treating them like real people compared to everyone else”, and I hear you. And in the situations where that is the case, like him greeting the Woodhouse’s butler and asking after his family I think that’s totally fine and in character. But things like the servants moving the knee cushions every time someone moves down the line at strawberry picking, to me, is AS ridiculous as the “servants clipping the lawn on their hands and knees with tiny scissors” trope. Like we get it, people took the lower classes for granted, but I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that it would be easier and more realistic to have Mrs. Elton have to move her own knee cushion. I don’t think Knightley would instruct his servants, who he treats so well, to do that kind of thing, but you could write in Mrs. Elton’s expectation of it if you wanted. It seems like the kind of thing she would expect the landed gentry to do.

Screenwriter for some of the best loved Austen’s (including the sacrosanct 1995 P&P Mini-series and my favorite Sense & Sensibility), I thought of Davies for years as untouchable; until Sanditon happened and left everyone who knows anything about Jane Austen really wondering where this mess came from. I put it to you now that it was there in Davies all along.

Davies admitted, when talking about the drastic “Sexing Up” he did in Sanditon that he felt Austen’s works could have done with a bit more sex appeal. I can hardly disagree and additions like Darcy’s little swim in the pond and Edward Ferrars’ angsty wood-chopping are welcome and beloved. But it seems that what he really wanted all along was what he gave us in Sanditon; and finally, without actual source material to stand in his way, he had a chance let his dirty old man show and gave “Austen” the sexing up he thought it needed.

And it gets more troubling as you look back.

In my opening paragraph to this review I mentioned a 2008 blog post that not only agreed with me that there’s something very off about this screenplay, but gave me some possible insights as to why. It points out numerous things that I have always questioned in this version but have never seen anyone else criticize (though I am informed that more recently it has gained its’ share of critics). In fact the post itself actually points out that almost no one in the Austen Blog-sphere had (at that point) criticized this version’s faults in any meaningful way, but my favorite thing about it is that it points out what you find in Davies’ screenplay if you pay careful attention to it “Rather than sitting there and cataloguing what is “technically faithful and whatnot”.

Many Austen bloggers have kind of been playing Miss Taylor to Davies’ Emma for some two decades and change.

The most troubling thing of all is Davies own comments on Mr. Knightley (and other things, more inferred in his screen play). All of the aspects of this interpretation of Knightley that I mentioned earlier seem to stem from the fact that, as quoted in Sarah Caldwell’s book on his works, Davies thinks there’s “Something odd going on with Knightley.”

Davies clearly reads foul, or at least questionable, intentions in Mr. Knightley but I find it interesting that, rather than cutting out material he may have found troubling about Knightley in the book out of his screenplay, he doubled down by adding MORE troubling lines and situations (that were never in the book at all, and imagined solely by himself) in a romantic story with a happy ending.

Perhaps there’s not so much something odd going on with Knightley, Mr. Davies, but with you.

Final Thoughts

At this point I might ask what it is that everyone sees in this version that makes them think it’s so perfect, but that would be a bit pointless since all I’ve read since I discovered this version is people on elaborating on just that and I don’t care to hear much more.

“The lines are verbatim!” textually, perhaps, but it’s the ones that added that trouble me.

“The leads have so much chemistry!” I’m glad you think so, but I can’t find it.

“The costumes are damn near perfect!” And brown. So, so very brown.

As a 90's TV period drama, this version is pretty standard. It sticks to the book (except in those places where the screenwriter saw fit to dabble with some subtle but troubling suggestions about the characters.) And if it floats your boat, as always I'm glad it gives you what you want from the story.

I know I hold unpopular opinions on Jane Austen adaptations, and perhaps this is one of them, but every time I watch this version I feel the need to read the book as a cleanse. Perhaps Davies’s ferocious Knightley was simply a pendulum swing reaction to Douglas McGrath’s almost too laid back interpretation in the Miramax film from earlier in 1996, but even if that’s the case it’s just uncalled for and is my biggest turn off for this film.

Tone: 3

Ribbon Rating: Badly Done! (40 Ribbons)

Casting: 5

Acting: 6

Scripting: 4

Pacing: 2

Cinematography: 4

Setting: 3

Costumes: 5

Music: 2

Book Accuracy: 6

[fluffykitty1999-blog]

Dog of the Military- Chapter 31

Chapter 31- Shopping

"Can we go to the High Market?" Ed asked hopefully as he bounced into the passenger seat of Roy's car.

"Brother. That place is crawling with sketchy people." Al admonished from where he was settling into the entire backseat of the car.

"We aren't going anywhere until you two put on your seatbelts." Roy admonished, shooting a glance over at both boys witheringly.

There was clanking from the backseat as Alphonse hurried to comply.

Ed blew out a breath and rolled his eyes.

"I don't see why I gotta wear a seat belt. My automail can't be broken. And Al's a suit of armor- nothing can hurt him!"

"No, but Alphonse could hurt us. If there was a crash and Al were to get thrown forward, we could be hurt. And you might have automail, Ed, but you're not invincible."

Ed crossed his arms. "It's stupid. Don't tell me what to do."

"Oh, so you think I'm being bossy, huh?" Roy asked.

"Ed, just put it on." Al piped up from the backseat. There was a click. Al was too large to fit the middle seat seat belt, so he had taken 2 seat belts from either side of the backseat and fastened them both over himself in an x-like fashion.

"I'm tired of old people trying to tell us what to do, Al!" Ed protested.

"It's for your own good, you know." Roy supplied patiently. "Seatbelts reduce the risk of death by 45% and cut the risk of serious injury to 50%(1). They also hold you in place so you don't get ejected in a crash. 3 of 4 people who get ejected from a vehicle don't survive(1). You wouldn't want to do that to Al, would you?"

Ed was silent.

"Remember that car crash was saw in Bresh, brother?" Al added. "We couldn't do anything to help. Everyone was gone. All we could do was cover up the mess with blankets so that the teenager's families wouldn't see them. Maybe if they'd been wearing seat belts it'd have been different."

Ed clicked his seatbelt into place. "Fine, whatever. Let's get going we have shopping to do."

Roy turned the key in the ignition and started out.

"So- does anyone want anything specific from the store?" Roy asked.

"Waffles." Ed said happily. "And soft pretzels."

"Scented candles." Al added.

"You're gonna polish yourself with that flowery smelling wax again aren't you?" Ed spoke up.

"It's the closest thing I can get to deodorant, brother." Al sounded slightly hurt.

"I know. Get some of those cucumber melon candles-I like the smell of those." Ed said quietly.

"Okay." Al brightened significantly.

"I wanna go to the High Market too." Ed piped up, looking over at Roy.

"For what?" Roy was wary. The high market sold useful things, but it was also a backdoor apothecary that sold unregulated pharmaceuticals and other odd, possibly illegal substances in the alley under the guise of traditional medicine.

"They got those cookies that have your future written inside them!" Ed looked childish with excitement.

"You need a cookie to tell you that?" Roy scoffed. "I could tell you for free. 'you will be short and miserable'."

Al sniggered from the backseat and Ed frowned. "Normally I would yell at you for that, but I wanna go to the High Market. So can we go?"

"Yes. IF you two stay close to me and we don't take long."

"Score!" Ed pumped his fist in the air, looking excited.

"What do you want to get shopping, Colonel?" Al asked.

Mustang shrugged. "Trash bags, milk, butter, eggs, bread, jam."

"Boring stuff." Ed added.

Roy pulled into the shopping center. "You say that, but I don't see you complaining when we eat dinner."

"Can we get Mac n' cheese?"

"Yes, we can get a few boxes."

"Can we get frozen burritos and ramen?"

Roy wrinkled his nose. Ever since Ed moved in with them, he'd realized the kid seemed to live off microwaved food.

"Yes, a couple. But you need to eat a vegetable every once in awhile." he got out of the car, and Ed did the same.

"Well excuse me for being too busy to go harvest nature's bounty." Ed scoffed.

"Guys!" Al called from the back, muffled by the car doors.

"What's up, Al?" Roy turned around to see Al still strapped into the back seat, his large hands struggling with the seatbelts.

"Can you unbuckle me? I'm stuck!?"

LINEBREAK LINEBREAK LINEBREAK LINEBREAK LINEBREAK

"Okay, this actually isn't so bad." Roy had his list nearly halfway completed. Ed insisted on standing on the bottom rack of the cart and holding onto the back to ride it, but Al was pushing, so Roy couldn't complain. And Al was tall enough to reach everything on the top shelf.

"Ed- name something that isn't microwaved that you'll eat."

"Peanut butter sandwhich."

"Done." Roy grabbed a jar of peanut butter off the shelf and tossed it into the cart.

"Fruits and vegetables you like?"

"Fruitsnacks!" Ed looked excited, pointing at a large box. "Those are the best, Mom used to get those for me!"

"Yeah I remember those." Al sounded excited as well.

It melted Roy's resolve. Just a little. He picked up the box. It said it was amde with real fruit juice. That was close enough to a fruit, wasn't it? If Trisha Elric had bought them for the boys, they couldn't be horrible.

"Okay. Fine. But REAL fruits, now."

"I don't have time for real fruits. I'm constantly running around to headquarters or the library." Ed complained.

Roy couldn’t argue with the kid. He was pretty busy. But still, that wasn't an excuse to live out of vending machines.

"Alright, so how about a grab and go snack. You like applesauce?"

"Yeah."

Roy snagged a box of applesauce pouches and threw it into the cart, then kept going. He just had to make sure Ed didn't realize they gave those applesauce pouches to toddlers commonly. Because he doubted Ed would care enough to grab a spoon or a more traditional applesauce cup.

"What about yogurt?" Roy asked.

Ed narrowed his eyes. "Milk." he groused from where he was holding onto the cart.

"Cheese sticks?" Roy held up the package enticingly.

"Okay." Ed acquiesced. "It doesn't taste like milk."

They were just about done shopping- the only thing left was to get coffee.

Roy started off towards the aisle but stopped when he realized Al wasn't following pushing the cart.

The boy was looking at a duster in the cleaning aisle. "Throw it in the cart, Al. I'll dust your armor off tonight if you want." he said. Al couldn't really eat, but it wasn't fair to exclude the boy from shopping.

"Thank you!"

"It's nothing. Let's get going. I want to hit the yellow market before it gets too late.".

LINEBREAK LINEBREAK LINEBREAK LINEBREAK LINEBREAK

It got dark early in the fall. So even though it was only a little after 5, dusk was setting in on the city as he and the boys parked alongside the street in the nicer part of town and walked towards the yellow market.

Ed had an excited bounce in his step at the prospect of fortune cookies, and Al was hoping to find stray cats.

The warm glow of streetlights faded as they entered the rougher neighborhood of town- a block or so was dark, before the hanging string lights and colorful candle lanterns lit up the street.

The barren streets of central melted into a new landscape of men shouting about wares in a Xingese tongue. Men with cone-shaped hates and women in flowing garb, as well as children and stray dogs ran though the streets, adding to the commotion and the smells and sights of the market.

People were selling vibrant flowers, roast seafood on sticks, and a variety of meat and pastries.

One market stall had a variety of little animals made of colored paper, and Alphonse stopped to look.

The children stopped running and playing with their sticks and hoops when they saw Edward and stared, whispering among themselves.

Roy wondered if they recognized him as the Fullmetal Alchemist or not. Normally children were enthralled by Alphonse and his armor, not Edward...

A cold wind blew, rustling the paper lanterns and scattering the children. They took off down various alleyways and down the street.

It unnerved Roy, for some reason.

Ed had found the shop he was looking for- an old woman selling the cookies he wanted.

She shakily bagged them up for him and they chatted as he got out his money to pay her.

Alphonse squatted to set a stray cat near the mouth of an alley.

The quiet suddenly struck Roy as odd. The market callers had stopped shouting about their wares and people had stopped chattering. Mothers took their children and went to other stalls further away from them.

A woman ran into Roy and fell, scattering her things on the ground.

"Sorry!" she exclaimed, her angular Xingese eyes drawing him in.

"No, not a problem at all." Roy bent to help her pick up her scattered items, though he couldn't stop the hairs of unease form standing up on the back of his neck.

As they both picked up the fallen items from the ground, the woman leaned closer to him, eyes wide. "You must leave now. They will come for the boy. Men offer lot of money for him. Children go get men- they take boy."

Roy froze for a moment, before he nodded, handing her one of the items he'd been picked up and straightening.

"Edward! Al!"

Ed had paid for his cookies- the old woman at the shop had somehow given him a large stick of candy as well and was patting him on the head.

"What?" Ed asked, looking annoyed at the interruption.

"We're going. Now." his voice left no room for argument, and Ed fell into step beside him and Al as they headed back the way they came.

"But we just got here." Ed complained.

"You got your cookies. Now let's go."

He couldn't shake the feeling they were being watched, though they got home that night without incident.

Yes- I know that in cannon the year is like 1920. I just like to imagine Roy taking his boys to walmart. I don’t know why, but it’s a balm for my soul.

Obligatory ko-fi link here; https://ko-fi.com/fluffykitty12 .