#there were times when people thought the asian foods i had were weird but now there's growing appreciation of it which makes me happy

[ihavethedreamies]

Sitting Out the Storm | Jisung

Park Jisung - NCT Dream

Word Count: ~6.2k

Pairing: Jisung x AFAB!Reader

Genre: Reader-Insert, Fluff, Cuddling, Eventual Kisses, Pining, Flirting

Warnings: She/Her Pronouns used, Blizzard/Snowstorm

Author's Note: I squealed so much writing this because right when I realized that sweet little Jisung had gotten super hot (I was in denial for a while), and this came out. He's younger than me by a few years and since I have been into Kpop for such a long time, it was weird that he was younger than me. My friend and I struggled with Dream at first because they were our age or younger and we weren't used to it. I'm over it now.

I am cross-posting this on Archive and Wattpad. Please reblog! If you know anyone that would like this or future fics but they aren't on here my name and icon are exactly the same on the other sites. Happy reading!

As you stepped out of the convenience store, you felt a drop of cold on your cheek. Looking up at the streetlight, you saw the small flakes drifting down from the sky. Reaching out a gloved hand, you watched a bigger one hit the pink fleece and melt into it, making you smile. You loved snow, it was so pretty. Though, when it had been there for months and hadn't yet melted and was mixed in with a good deal of dirt, then it was time to go. However, it was the beginning of November and had not yet snowed for the season. Getting snapped out of your reverie by your phone alarm going off, you pulled it out of your pocket and headed down the sidewalk. You had five minutes to get back to campus before your phone would blow up with texts and missed calls. The group chat already started to ding, and you rolled your eyes, shutting the sound off before someone thought there was an emergency alert going off.

"I am bringing you guys food." You grumbled, picking up the pace and crossing the street to get back on campus. You started a trot and saw a group huddled together in the middle of the commons near the recently-turned off fountain.

"FOOD." You heard a shout and then the stampede stormed over to you, the four bags wrenched from your hands.

"You're welcome." You grumbled and waited for them to sort stuff out so you could get your own snacks.

"Hey, that's mine."

"You already got yours, there was two."

"This is the wrong flavor."

"It is?"

"I wanted strawberry."

"This brand doesn't have strawberry."

"Why is this cold?"

"Because it's ice cream…"

"Thank you." You are pulled out of the argument of nonsense by a soft voice next to you. You turned to see the youngest of the group giving you a small smile, his snacks gathered in his large hands.

"Sure, Ji. Did I get yours right?"

"I think you got everyone's right, but Chenle stole Renjun's and Hyuck's." He whispered and you snickered.

"Noona!" A very loud voice shouted from a short distance.

"Yes?"

"I have yours!" Chenle held it up in the air as if to throw it and you, "don’t!"

"Aw." He sighed and walked it over to you and you snatched the bag of candy from him. You gave him a look.

"What?" When he didn't move, you shoved your hand in his pocket, to which he screamed, and grabbed your bottle of water.

"I've been violated!"

"You're so loud!"

"He's always loud!"

"Now you're loud."

"Hey! We're in public!" You scolded as a group of girls walked past whispering to each other. Despite the dark, it was only a little past 6, so people were still leaving classes. The seven boys quieted down and shuffled nervously under your scolding gaze.

"Now let’s go, its cold out and we're already late." You looked at your phone. It was only a minute past, but they had scheduled the game room for 6:30 and could only stay for a couple hours. Last time they didn't reserve it, the football boys had taken over and there was only so much seven pretty Asian boys could do against a group of sweaty muscle heads. You did not want to ever go through that absurdity again. When the game room was reserved, it really just meant that the group had exclusive access to the TVs and consoles, but the rest of the room was still open. The set up allowed two groups of four to play each other on separate consoles, but in the same room. You were not normally one for multi-player video games, but playing with them was honestly fun. The two teams would work together to take the other people on the server out and then go up against each other. You could always hear the groans of the others through their headsets when you guys logged on. Because of where you played, there was no live-speech engagement and eight people against everyone versus four is a little disadvantageous.

"(Y/N), come here," Jaemin waited for you and linked your arms. He was trying to suck up your warmth and it made it somewhat difficult to walk.

"We have like two minutes; you can deal with being cold."

"You are now my personal heater."

"No."

"Yes." Little did you know, trailing in the back were the two youngest.

"You're frowning." Chenle whispered, something he hardly ever did.

"No." Jisung cleared his throat, burying his hands deeper in his pockets, they were almost too big to fit.

"Yes."

"I'm cold too." Donghyuck ran backwards from where he was by Mark and linked his other arm with yours.

"How am I supposed to walk now?" You were being jostled between the two, the height difference making your gait uneven and now you were too warm. Chenle heard Jisung grumble and burst into his dolphin-laugh. Mark, Jeno and Renjun leading the pack were talking about something that happened in their class that day, Hyuck and Jaemin were arguing about something, Chenle was teasing Jisung, and you were beginning to regret your life choices.

"Okay, I really can't keep walking like this," You scolded and the two on your sides ignored you.

"Guys-"

"Let her walk on her own!" Jisung's surprisingly deep voice rose, and everyone halted in their tracks to look at him. The two sheepishly let you go, shocked by the maknae's outburst. You sighed in relief and ran ahead, between Mark and Jeno, and to the door of the activity center.

"Come on, you heathens!" You called for them, holding the door open as they shuffled inside, still shocked by Jisung's shout. Chenle was giggling as he walked past and Jisung gave you a small smile.

"Thank you." You beamed and his heart thumped, and you followed him inside. Going to the hall leading from the side entrance, you all arrived at the game room. Luckily that night was pretty calm and there were some seniors playing pool and a few girls playing at the old Dance Dance Revolution machine in the back. You went over to the snack bar to the guy running the sigh up sheet and he grinned.

"Good night for you guys, not many people here." He slid the clipboard to you, and you signed your name again next to where you had reserved the TVs. The boys began to settle in, throwing their coats in a pile on the floor, and spread their snacks out on the coffee table. You moved to your usual spot and found that it literally was taken. The chair was gone.

"Hey, where'd the red armchair go?"

"Some kid spilled soda on it, it dried sticky, someone sat on it and when they stood up, tore a big hole in the upholstery." The supervisor told you and you scowled down at the empty spot.

"Where will I sit?" You whispered to yourself.

"Noona, sit with me!" Donghyuck called to you from the other armchair.

"There's no room!" Renjun pointed out.

"We three barely fit on these couches." Mark added and you realized you would have to sit on the hardwood floor.

"She can sit on my lap." Jaemin suggested, you couldn't even see his face but knew what it looked like based on his tone of voice.

"Renjun can sit on her lap." Jeno teased and the other boy glared at him.

"I'll sit on the floor, Noona." Jisung stood up from where he normally sat next to Chenle. You didn't catch the look the second-youngest gave the other, but Jisung glared in response.

"Thanks Ji." You smiled and he sat down in front of Jaemin on the other side of Chenle. You sat down next to the loudest one and told him, "Don't shout in my ear, please." He whined in protest and Jeno handed out the controllers.

"Hurry up and sign in!" Donghyuck called to Mark who was furiously moving the joystick to get their credentials plugged in. Right as he hit enter, the game didn't not start to load in, because the power went out.

"What!" Someone shouted, the girls in the back corner screamed in anger, one of them was about to beat a high score. After a few seconds, the emergency lights kicked in and cast a dull glow around the room. A ding came out of the speakers and a tired voice spoke up.

"Attention all students. Due to the incoming blizzard, it seems the power grid has malfunctioned and the power to the south campus has been shut off. Emergency generators have kicked in but will only last a short while. All dorms on the north campus will have all power diverted to them and will be the only buildings with safe levels of heating from the cold. Accommodations will be made for on-campus students that have nowhere off-campus to stay the night. If you have friends in the Stanley or Cramer Halls, Harvey Apartments, or Jameson Suites, please make your own accommodations if possible. For this case, girls will be allowed in the boy's side of Stanley hall, but not the other way around. Please see the RA on duty at the dorm desks if you need assistance. Thank you." The speaker cut off and it seemed that not just the whole room, but the whole building - no - the whole campus groaned. You did not live on campus, so you were about to call your roommate to tell her the situation. As you pulled out your phone, it rang, your roommate herself on the other end.

"Hey, the power went out-"

"Yeah, it did here to."

"What?"

"Yeah, it seems the whole south side of town is out. I'm going to my boyfriend’s; will you be able to find somewhere?"

"Oh, uh," You glanced at the boys who were all illuminated by their phone screens, but they were looking at you.

"I'll figure it out." You tell her and you exchange a little more information and then hang up.

"Okay, I need to stay with someone." You turned to them fully and they looked between each other and began to type furiously on their phones. Considering nothing came in to your phone, they were in the group chat without you that they denied existed. You waited a second till they looked back at you, to each other, then more typing.

"Well?" You had waited long enough.

"Jaemin and Jeno are out because Jaemin doesn't understand personal space." Renjun jabbed his thumb at the other one.

"Hey!"

"I would rather not have you and her in my bed in the morning, thank you." Jeno looked at his roommate, a non-verbal argument flashing over their faces.

"Mark has to stay with Hyuck, but no one trusts Donghyuck anyway." Renjun continued.

"Hey! What'd I do?"

"You stole her-"

"Right! Okay! Who’s next?" Hyuck diverted the conversation, and you narrowed your eyes in suspicion at him.

"I live with my mom and that's a can of worms I don't want to open." Chenle motioned with his hand back and forth.

"Which would leave Jisung and Renjun." They all looked at you again and you refused to meet Renjun's gaze. Nothing had actually happened between you two, not really, it was just a kiss or three but that was enough for you two to get scared about it ruining your friendship and so you just didn't talk about it. Which left…

"Jisung? You okay with that?" You asked him. He had a single room, and while his bed was lofted, he did have a futon underneath it. It would work out pretty well, even if the futon was pretty uncomfortable as a bed. He didn't answer for a second, just gaping at you and everyone watched him till he startled to answer.

"Oh, yeah, of course." Jisung stood up and started to gather his things and everyone gave each other a look you couldn't read and then followed to do the same. You watched them with confusion and took your coat from Jeno when he handed it to you. They gathered their snacks and things and you all headed out of the game room, trailing after the rest of the students as the last people to leave. The snow had not only picked up but was getting significantly heavier as time passed. You all started to head to the north side of campus, where Chenle diverted off to head home. At a crossroad in the path, Jaemin and Jeno went off to their suite and the five of you headed toward Stanley. You had huddled together, you were stuck in the middle, acting as some sort of space heater. You were somewhat grateful though because it protected you from the snow some. There was a flood of students going into the dorm building and you shuffled in after them, and kicked the snow off your shoes and brushed it from your coats. People were milling about, some RAs going around getting information. Renjun said bye to the rest of you, giving you a look and you shook your head minutely and he headed off. An RA finally came over and he got Mark's information for him to stay with Donghyuck and the elder dragged Hyuck down the hall before he could try and persuade you to stay with him as well. You stood next to Jisung, able to feel his nerves rolling off of him in waves.

"Are you sure you're okay with me staying with you?" You asked.

"Yes! It's fine…Are you okay staying with me?" He wouldn't meet your eye.

"Yes, Jisung. Thank you." You bumped his arm with your shoulder, the height difference more poignant with you standing right next to him.

"What's your room?" The RA came over.

"702."

"Can I see your IDs?" He asked, clearly frazzled with all of this craziness. Jisung showed his and you took yours out of your wallet and handed it to him.

"You live off campus?" He asked.

"Yes, but it’s on the south side of town, so the powers out there too."

"Okay, are you two dating-"

"No!" You both clarified and the guy shook his head.

"Right, just friends?"

"Yes." You took your sock hat off, brushing some strands out of your face.

"Okay. We're going to have to turn the heat down to preserve energy, so I would recommend not leaving the dorm room too much to keep the hot air in." The RA smiled, handing your ID back and the younger boy led you out of the lobby and to the stairwell. The elevators were clogged with people and while you weren't pleased about climbing up to the seventh floor, it would be faster. When you reached the second-to-top floor, he led you down the hall to his room. You had only been there one other time, since it was so far up, you most often hung out in Renjun's room or somewhere else entirely. It was cleaner than you thought it would be, and thankfully he had a TV and microwave in there. It was colder than normal, but much better than outside. One thing nice about this dorm building, there was at least a toilet between each room, so you didn't have to use anything communal, which was probably why they allowed girls on the boy's side.

"The guy that lived on the other side moved out, so the other room is vacant, you don't have to worry about the bathroom." Jisung told you and you nodded.

"Do you have a sweatshirt I can change into? I have a pair of leggings in my bag to change out of my jeans but no other shirt.

"Yes!" He rushed over to his dresser. His clothes were in the drawers, but not folded or organized by any means. You smiled at the little arrangement he had of pictures above his desk. Most of them polaroids taken with Jaemin's camera. There was one of you, him, and Chenle right in the middle of the display and that made you happy. He really was so stinking cute sometimes.

"Here, I think this is the smallest one I have." He handed you a simple grey hoodie with the school's name on it and you thanked him, going into the bathroom to change. Despite the fact that the sweatshirt was his smallest, you were still swimming in it. He always wore stuff that was oversized anyway. You looked at yourself in the mirror, the sleeves hanging down past your hands and the bottom hem hitting right above your knees.

"Giant child…" You shook your head, moving to roll the sleeves a bit to make them less dangly. You caught a whiff of something good on the fabric and buried your nose in it and sighed. He may not have smelled as good as Renjun, but it was still comforting. It was more likely his laundry detergent than cologne of any kind, but it smelled like Jisung. As you left the bathroom, you caught him in the middle of him changing into a sweatshirt himself. He had on a tank top underneath his shirt, but you still got a good look at how broad his shoulders were and, despite having a dancer's body, there was still muscle there to appreciate. You didn't make a sound till he had the sweatshirt on, not wanting to startle him then you let the door shut. He did jump a bit, but not too bad and he froze. Seeing you in his sweatshirt did things to him and you looked so cute with it pooling over you. You were so small compared to him, heck, you were small compared to Renjun, let alone him.

"I-is that comfortable?" He made sure and you nodded.

"Yes, thank you very much. I can log into my Netflix so we can watch something if you want? You don’t have it right?"

"Oh, no." He shook his head and handed you the remote. He shut the bright ceiling light off and the room took on a soft warm glow thanks to the two lamps he had on and the string of lights around the window. He stepped up a bit on the ladder of his lofted bed and grabbed the blankets he had up there, and he grabbed another one he had in the closet. He handed you one and sat next to you on the futon. It was lower to the ground than a normal one, he mentioned something about that being why it was on sale. It was comfy enough, but laid out to sleep on, the bar hit right in the middle of your back, so he suggested just sleeping on it like a couch.

"What do you want to watch?" You asked, having plugged in your login info, and was looking at the suggestions. You thought a movie would be good, but you had already watched everything on your list.

"Is The Hobbit still on here?" He asked.

"Yeah! You like the third one, right?" You clarified. The eight of you had a movie marathon watching through all three of The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings a few months back and he had mentioned his favorite.

"That okay?"

"Yeah. I'll probably cry at the ending, just warning you." You told him. You started the movie and both of you dug out your snacks and things and settled in. It was chillier than either of your ideals, so you suggested sharing the blankets and layering them. He stuttered out an agreement and you scooted in closer. You had never felt smaller. He was not the biggest guy you had met, but he was the biggest of the friend group and you were quite small. He was nice and warm, and he felt the same about you. Getting so entrenched in the movie and snacks, neither of you noticed the weather growing even more severe outside the window. Suddenly, a knock on the door startled both of you and you hit pause while he untangled from the blankets, opening the door.

"Hey, guys, I know this sucks…Uh, the storm is getting worse and we're having to divert even more power elsewhere. Since there are only solo rooms on this floor and the eighth, and not all rooms are full, we are moving everyone to the ballroom in the Central Building. Also, she's the only extra person on these two floors anyway…" The RA trailed off and Jisung blinked at the guy as you groaned.

"Seriously?"

"Yeah. Sorry. We are getting some extra mattresses out of storage and we're going to put on some movies, but the Central Building is on its own power reserve since it’s the official emergency shelter. You won't have to go outside; you can just go to the skyway on the third floor and get over there." He shrugged and you two sighed and got your stuff together. He threw some other things in his backpack, and you put your shoes back on. He grabbed the blankets you had gathered, and you both begrudgingly take the elevator down and follow the ten others that are heading over. As you are walking across the skyway, you are both grateful you put on your coats too because there was no heat on the covered bridge. You cringed as a great blast of wind hit the window, making the plexiglass wobble a bit. Not liking the skyway to begin with, this whole thing was not helping. Everyone halted when a loud snap was heard, a spark, and then the light fixtures above all shattered as the circuit overloaded. You yelped, moving to cover your head, but instead, two arms wrapped around you and Jisung shielded you from the glass raining down. Everyone just stood in the dark for a second, the light coming from the other end of the walkway being the only light. Not even the streetlights were on.

"Are you okay?" He whispered to you, his deep voice right near your ear.

"Y-yeah, let's go." You backed away slightly, not wanting to flinch away from him and hurt his feelings. It was incredibly sweet that he did that, and it was clearly instinctual. Your heart fluttered and he turned his phone flashlight on, immediately grabbing your hand and leading you the rest of the way, around the piles of broken glass. Getting to the other building, someone that was part of the staff led the group to the designated ballroom where they had a bunch of the school-provided mattresses spread out. They had no sheets on them, but that was okay for that night.

"Are you Jisung Park?" A woman called to him, and you both turned to her.

"Yeah?"

"Well, it seems we only got mattresses for each tenant, since she was the only extra, we do not have one for her…" She trailed off, and before you could answer, "That's okay, I'll let her have it." Jisung's immediate response once again caused your heart to flutter. He was always sweet, but this was focused solely on you, once again, and you weren't sure what to make of it. The woman blinked a bit in surprise to and then gave you a coy look.

"Perfect! We are having popcorn made and we're going to be putting on the Avengers movies. Let one of us know if you need anything!" She smiled and you went over and picked one of the mattresses. He wouldn't let you even touch the mattress, so you carried the blankets as he hauled it over to the corner near a window. He wanted to keep an eye on the weather outside, which was getting even worse. You laid out one of the blankets on the mattress which had the same upholstery as a mat used in gym class to make sure you didn't get hurt. You had a thick foam pad on your bed when you lived on campus and now you had a legit mattress that was covered in the highest-thread count sheets you could find. The way he set the bed up, you could rest your back on the wall and face where they were going to project the movie. There were way more than ten other people in there, telling you they had to have this set up for other residents. There were probably like 40 kids in there. No wonder they didn't have an extra mattress for you. As the first Captain America movie started, you two sat close like in his dorm, under the two blankets, but didn’t say anything. It was one thing to sit like that with just you two, but it was different with other people. However, neither of you could bring yourselves to not sit so close. It was warmer there too, but you two found great comfort in the proximity. When they announced the popcorn was ready, you couldn't even get ready to get up before he was doing so and getting it for you. Watching him go up, you caught yourself staring at his back, remembering seeing him in the tank top, and wondering what he looked like from the front. He was pretty shy, and it was rare to see him showing so much skin. You had noticed throughout knowing him that he really had matured. Not just emotionally, but physically. All of the guys had come to America for college when they were scouted to be dancers on the Dance Team. Despite the age gap, they all started off as Freshmen and so you had known them for almost two years. It was crazy how much he changed in that short amount of time; he really did the most out of all of them. Seeing sweet little Jisung all grown up should have made you feel proud, or nostalgic for when he was the cute maknae. But he had really grown up well and turned out to be way more handsome than you even thought he would be. Shaking your head to clear the thoughts, he came and sat back down with you. You took the two bags of popcorn, the ones they used at all the sporting events, and he covered back up with the blankets.

"Thank you." You told him, handing him his own bag. You both at in mostly silence, watching the movie you had both seen many times before. He peeled the canvas curtain away from the window next to him to look outside. He couldn't see much because of the level of snow and wind there was whipping around.

"Its nasty out." You commented looking out the window with him. He hummed in agreement and then both sat back down before turning back to the movie. You could feel him looking at you instead though, and the piercing stare eventually drove you to look at him as well.

"Ah!" He got caught, looking away quickly.

"Jisung?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you, for being so sweet." You were going to add 'tonight', but the more you thought about it, the more you realized he was always like that. Even earlier that night, he made sure to bring you your snacks and even told off the older two for not letting you go. The week before, you were reluctant to go up and get more food at the cafeteria, since what you wanted was being served by a guy that gave you the creeps. He didn't even say anything, just got up and then came back with a plate full. When he would see that the snack shop was almost sold out of your favorite, he would buy the last one to make sure you would get it. He always held the door open for you and waited after his class for you to go eat lunch. So much more had happened, but the more you thought about it, the more your heart raced.

"Oh, well, uh-" You cut him off by scooching even closer and linking your arm with his, resting your head on his shoulder. You felt him tense when you did this, but he relaxed quicker than you thought he would. What he did next made your heart stop momentarily. Jisung shifted and rested his cheek against the top of your head. That's not what got you though, it’s what he did after. He placed a small kiss on the crown of your head. He probably felt you tense, and you didn't want him to worry that you disliked it. So, you nuzzled into him more, and moved your hand to touch his. He turned his palm up to allow you better access and you linked your hands, your fingers slotting between his. Your hands were small to begin with, and his were much larger than even what his should be. His large hand engulfed yours and you honestly loved it. You were not at all expecting to be feeling this way about sweet little Jisung. Though, there was always something there, so these emotions hit you like a tank. You probably always had a crush on him, but you thought it was more like he's a cute little brother. You began to realize things about yourself that proved this. Whenever you had something to tell the guys, you started with him. Wanted to show them something you made? Jisung first. You always chose to sit next to him if possible, and whenever you needed someone to talk to, you went to him. When he, Jaemin, and Mark got sick, you took care of him the whole time. You did some with Mark, but Jaemin was so obnoxious and clingy, and you did not want to catch it yourself.

"Noona?"

"Yeah?" He didn't reply right away, he just rubbed this thumb over the back of your hand.

"Are you sure?"

"About what?"

"Me?" He was so quiet and sounded so scared. You pulled back to look at his sweet face and he looked so nervous.

"What do you mean?"

"I- I'm younger than you, and I'm awkward and stupid-"

"You are not stupid!" You scolded, pulling back from him some but not taking your hand out of his. He didn't say anything, just looked at your interlinked hands.

"I need you to be one hundred percent sure, because I don't think I could handle losing you." He whispered and everything seemed to turn to slow motion. While he didn't say the fated three words, you could feel what he meant in his words. It took your breath away and brought tears to your eyes. Jisung finally looked at you, right in the eye, and you swallowed the lump in your throat. You really wished you weren't surrounded by forty other college kids…

"I'm sure, Jisung." You brought his arm up to wrap around you and he pulled you into his side, cuddling together to finish the movie. Periodically you would glance out the window at the white out conditions, but you two felt so warm with each other. As they put up the third movie, you both were getting very tired. He originally offered to let you have the mattress, but you insisted that you share. You were in the back corner, and honestly most people wouldn't care as long as your clothes were on. He laid down against the wall, placing a folded blanket under his head and laid one down for you. Starting off next to each other, you soon found yourself curled into his side with your head on his chest.

"Good night, (Y/N)." He whispered and you drifted off to his thudding heart.

You both woke up to hear the other students stirring and a bunch of them were looking out the windows on the other side of the room. At least they were considerate of you two sleeping where you were. As you moved, Jisung grunted and yawned, his arm around you tightening to prevent you from sitting up.

"Ji." You whispered and his eyes flew open and he noticed the other people awake and let you both sit up. Getting your bearings, you both stand and adjust and look out the window yourselves. The snow had stopped, the sunrise stunning in the mostly clear sky, the light bouncing off the untouched blanket of white. A staff member came in and announced that the power was back to normal, but classes would be cancelled that day and the next. They told everyone to leave the mattresses as is and you gathered your belongings and went back across the skyway to get to his dorm room. The glass had been cleaned and the lights replaced already. He led you to his room and he dropped his stuff off and you both grabbed your coats. Jisung had offered to walk you back home, and you weren't sure when you could do that because most of the walkways had not been plowed or shoveled yet.

"Oh, right."

"Do you have anything breakfast-y?" You asked him and he went to the dresser under the TV, and you looked through what he had. The only thing that was a breakfast food was a bunch of Poptarts. He didn't have a toaster, but they did in the kitchen on each floor. Donghyuck and Renjun lived on the same floor, so you went down to that lobby to meet them and Mark. You sent a text to them to go there to and they were already there when you got there. You cracked open the box of toaster pastries and slid some into the four-slot toaster.

"Did you see how much snow is out there?" Donghyuck asked and you nodded.

"Yeah, it’s gotta be at least a foot, maybe two." You turned to them and rested against the counter. Jisung did the same next to you, your shoulders brushing. Renjun and Mark shared a look as Hyuck was too busy rambling while looking out the window.

"I heard the people on the top floor had to go somewhere else?" Renjun asked and the toaster popped so Jisung answered while you dealt with those.

"Yeah, they had to divert more power for heating and stuff, so they took everyone on floors seven and eight and brought us to the central building ballroom. They gave us extra mattresses and put on movies; they had some other kids there that had nowhere else to go. I was the only one with someone staying with me, so we had to share-" He caught himself and Hyuck whipped around to look at him. You put two Poptarts onto two plates and set them down for Mark and Renjun then turned back to make more.

"You shared a bed?!?" Donghyuck shouted much too loudly. All four of you shushed him and he came to sit down with the other two.

"He was going to let me just take the mattress, but I suggested we share." You shrugged, your cheeks tingling a bit.

"Did you tell her?" Mark looked at the maknae. His eyes widened and then the eldest looked at you.

"Tell me what?"

"Hyung!" Jisung cringed and he threw his hands up in surrender. You cast a glance at Renjun, and he gave you a supportive smile and nodded. Instead of either of you saying anything, you delicately rested your hand in his and he linked your fingers.

"You lucky-!" Hyuck shook his head and Mark grinned brightly, laughing.

"Finally!" The rest of the Poptarts got done and you all ate before deciding to bundle up and play in the snow. They were working on plowing and shoveling, but you were in no hurry to get home. People were already having snowball fights, making snowmen, and burrowing tunnels in the snow. You all felt like little children as you trotted outside and the other three ran through the nearly two-foot snow toward where Jaemin and Jeno were already building a snow fort. You checked the group chat, and the last message was from Chenle saying he was on his way.

"The snow is so pretty!" You beamed and Jisung grabbed your hand again and started to lead you a bit away. There was a small little courtyard next to the central building and behind the admissions building. It had been shoveled already, even the benches had been brushed of snow and dried off. He led you over to the fountain that they had shut off weeks ago and faced you to him.

"I wanted to do this earlier, but there were people around…" He stepped closer till his head is tipped down, your noses touching. His big hands find your waist, if your coat wasn't on, he might have been able to touch his thumbs together. You tilted your head and his lips barely touched yours before he pulled back.

"I, um, have never…"

"That’s okay." You grinned, bringing one of the hands on his chest to his jaw and pulling him down to you. You led the kiss at first, but as his confidence grew, he pulled you ever closer and took over. It was like fireworks burst behind your eyes and when you finally separated, you giggled with glee and bumped his forehead.

"Let’s sit out the next storm together too." You suggested.

"How about all of them?"

Master-Master List

NCT Master List

[ransprang]

Namor x Asian!reader praying to water gods

Note:- saw this request earlier and decided to write it! Admins are Asian so hit close to home ;)

Your parents had always taught you about the power of mother earth’s elements. In your religion praying to sun meant asking for light and abundance, water for prosperity and a good farming season, earth for fertility. Thanks to your culture being surrounded by nature was your go to, it helped you feel relaxed and happy.

This season the rain was scarce, farmers were complaining. It was a nationwide issue, there was food shortage and people were suffering. You knew what your mother would have done, so after waking up that day you made your way to the lonely mountain lake nearby. The water from the springs collected into this small lake as it further flowed into the ocean. You stood there joining your hands and closing your eyes. You began reciting a chant you had learned in a scripture that your grandmother used to own, it was to summon the water king. Whispering to yourself for the ancient one to descend and make it rain on your land, making it fertile and luscious again. As you prayed, the wind blew faster against your skin and the sky began darkening. You weren’t sure if the wonder was done by your prayer or a coincidence, but you walked away with a smile regardless.

A few days of rain later there was a dry spell once again, despite there being no actual crisis, you thought back to the time you prayed and it rained. You liked rainy days better anyways, so you made your way down to the lake, followed the stream and reached the coastline. Staring into the horizon that seemed to blend in with the sky, you decided to say a quick prayer once again. “Oh lord of water, please listen to me again. Make it rain, let the plants feast and animals bathe.” You said in your native tongue. As you opened your eyes this time there was no change, everything was still the same. You embarrassingly giggled to yourself and turned around to leave when you heard splashes behind you, something seemed to be drawing closer.

Bracing yourself you turned around in haste, only to see a man fit to be a king, stand tall and wide before you. He had beautiful honey skin, dark eyes and hair, green shorts with ornaments that only made him glow more. As your eyes scanned him, the only jarring thing was the wings attached to his feet. Your heart began beating fast out of fear. He had lines of worry or annoyance on his forehead as he spoke in a thick accent “you’ve been calling for me.” For a moment you were shocked but finally realising he had heard your prayers. You softly spoke “are you the sea god?” He smiled widely “some might say…yes. What do you want?” you will-fully said “did you make it rain that day? Can you make it happen again” you felt naive. This could very well be a prankster who could shockingly hold his breath for long and weird feet. He laughed “No I didn’t, that was the skies. I do not make it rain”. You knew this was too weird to be true. He gave you one final smile before turning around to swim deep into the ocean again.

The incident had you reflecting back at home, it was almost funny and you had been an idiot to even believe him for a second. The next day early morning you decided to go back to the beach and pray again, and there he was. This time you saw him swim from the deep end to the shore, this man surely did not live in water right? He walked out “what is it now? You need to stop this.” You laughed “Wow you’re a dedicated prankster, where were you hiding?” He shot you a disgusted look and in no mood to entertain this conversation, he once again left.

Over the next few days you tried forgetting about it, but a part of you had more toxic thoughts. He was a friend on demand! Whoever he was and whatever he was up to, he would come to you when you called. A week down, you tried the ancient prayer once again, he showed up just as expected. This time you were convinced he was some sort of mermaid. He was visibly annoyed “You have to stop this. You will get yourself in trouble, you don’t know what you’re messing with” you responded nonchalantly “sure sure, mr olympic swimmer. How long can you even hold your breath for?”. He walked forward, closer to you, his chest close to yours, looking down into your eyes. You were lost in his black orbs, but, he was angry “do this again. And you will suffer the consequences.” You being a playful person, tippy toed and kissed his cheek. The man before made an expression he didn’t even know he could make, disgust mixed with shock. You chuckled, as he once again turned around and left this time a little embarrassed. Clearly his threats were futile.

The following month, you were spending the day with your family when an argument broke out. You felt berated and upset, spending most of your time at home with these people how could such disagreements even break out? Why was there no understanding? Crying you left for a walk alone at night. Just as you remembered your mysterious friend. Going to the secluded beach you chanted while crying, you were on the verge of breaking down, god you needed someone to talk to. But, nothing happened. He didn’t come…you chanted repeatedly, feeling like the boy who cried wolf, you sat there on a rock defeated.

Suddenly the waves rose, crashing louder against the shore. A built figure emerged, he finally came. He seemed to have heard your crying with your calling, this man brought sympathy with him this time. He sat next to you but you thought of him someone close to so you instantly hugged him tightly. Not sure of what to do he politely kept his hands on your back and comforted. “Please tell me your name…” you finally asked reeling yourself back in. -“Kukulkan or Namor” he said strongly. You had read about him before, in the stories of mythical heroes of Mayapan. You didn’t see him in that way though, your perception of Kukulkan was simply a friend from the sea. He saw the look in your eyes and said “what is it? Today I’ll stay”. You both sat on the rock together as you kept your head on his shoulder wrapping your arms around his bicep. You didn’t feel uncomfortable around him, after all spending nights thinking of him had made you used to the idea of having him close. Kukulkan didn’t seem to mind either. Spending the whole night talking to each other, he seemed to confide about Talokan in you too.

Kulkukan became your friend, he became a confidant and perhaps someone much closer. Over the next many years, he came when you called, he watched you change and grow as a human. Kulkukan listened and shared, till one day he took you with him into the waves of the ocean far far away.

Your Prayer,

Admin Sav

[seiya-starsniper]

Another Get To Know Me Game!

Tagged by @windsweptinred, this was so much fun to do! Love seeing a new version

Who was your first fictional crush?:

Hmmmm, instinct says Tuxedo Mask! I'm sure I had other fictional crushes but that's the one I most vividly remember. That and Xanatos from Gargoyles djdoaisjdoaij.

What’s the first colour you think of when I tell you to think of a colour?:

Purple!

Which fanfiction emotionally scarred you and still makes you shudder to this day?:

Oh there's...a few lmao. I have a tendency to read fics that horrify me for fun, and since we're on the webbed site that likes to judge people for using the Dead Dove tag, or any of the main Archive Warning tags, I'd rather not put those fics on blast. But I have read some truly brilliantly written and fucked up fics from the Fantastic Beasts fandom, that's all I'll say.

I’m coming to your house for dinner, non-negotiable, what are you making me?:

Japanese curry with chicken! That or Fettucine Alfredo. I like to overstuff my guests with food and those are my two go to meals for company!

Do you prefer lions or kangaroos?:

Lions! I love kangaroos too, but my love for cats, especially big cats, prevails.

Which fictional villain do you brush past the glaringly obvious issues for because you really like them?:

Uhhhh....almost all of them??? jkjkjk

In all seriousness though, I think my big ones I can think of are Shigaraki and Dabi from BNHA. Are they both awful, ruthless people who only want to cause pain and suffering to all who have hurt them? Yes. Do I want them to keep causing even more pain and suffering, even to my favorite hero characters, as a treat? Also yes.

I hate to caveat that in no way do I think any of of their actions are justified and that the villains should win and then the world would be a better place yada yada yada but well. Woobifying villains is a thing and also why I stay out of the fandom because I cannot stand my faves being defanged like that. Let my faves be horrible people aoijdosijad.

What would accompany your picture in the Burn Book in Mean Girls?:

Either the "Mexican Asian" (I'm Filipino-American, and sadly this is a thing I was called a lot lmao) or "The Hugger." I know a shit ton of people judged me a bit in school for being a hugger because...idk, people thought hugs were weird lmao. But joke's on them, I still enjoy hugs and Mr. Seiya hugs me all the time!

How many days would you last in the universe of your favourite fandom?:

Uhhhhhh considering no one really dies in Pokemon...I'd be fine lmao.

In Sandman???? Also would probably be fine since I'm based in the States and also many many miles away from the Corinthian's hunting grounds 🤣

Have you heard of Mischief Theatre?:

Only the name :(

Do you feel sorry for Medusa?:

Yes and no. I do feel bad the foundation of her story was be a woman killed for the glory of a man. And then to be remembered only as a horror, a monster to scare people with.

The modern interpretation of her story is absolutely fascinating to me and while it is still a tragic story, I absolutely love what she's come to represent. I love that her story has been rewritten to be a story of survival, of perseverance, of power even.

Which song makes you think of your OTP?:

Ooooooh there's so many! And of course now that I'm being put on the spot I can't think of any 🤣🤣

Starlight by Muse is definitely a Dreamling song to me, so much so that I wrote a fic with the lyrics in the title, so I'm going to roll with that one!

Which song makes you disassociate and daydream the fastest?:

Oh lord, honestly any Taylor Swift song will do this to me lmao. Lately, I've been drifting back to Would've, Could've, Should've, so we're going to go with that one!

No pressure tagging: @tj-dragonblade @bazzybelle @verminetroglodyte @tryan-a-bex @4typercent and anyone else who wants to play!

[heavymachinebun]

I had some spare time and I decided to draw up my first Splatoon OC, meet Abbi the Chef! She's an NB transfem immigrant learning cooking from the local jellyfish. She's friends with Sheldon and has a crush on Big Man and runs a fan blog.

I like talking design so I'm going to leave some design docs for Abbi, just for fun!

I got the idea for an OC while eating at a Chinese Seafood place that sold Abalone. I thought the little nub looked like a cute nubby face and I'm currently into Splatoon art and I thought, this was an excellent concept for a non-cephalopod Splatoon OC! There's a lot of very fun Splatoon OCs that are just weird fish people and I was inspired to try my hand at one too.

The initial concept was a little AMAB abalone guy with a face where the nub is, and I would be able to leave half the shell behind his nubby meat face. Abbi had to be a bit tubby because abalone are literally just round lumps of meat, and I like finding opportunities to design tubbier body shapes because they are so rare. I figured out that the other half shell looked like a Chinese wok, and I made the concept in a Chinese restaurant so it made a lot of sense. The jellyfish cooks in Splatoon 3 make primarily Asian style food, it made sense that Abbi would be learning from them. The rest of the design is just a series of Chef accessories, some cool earrings where Abalone shells have those little holes (3 for Splatoon 3), and poorly drawn Zombie Hi-Horses because I like those shoes in game and they have a good color scheme for Abbi.

Abbi's design is very gentle and doesn't really feel actiony like a lot of Splatoon OC's. It didn't make a lot of sense that Abbi would really interact with the action hero agents, but it did make sense for Abbi to have friendships with the more mundane supporting cast members who are often overlooked. Sheldon and Abbi share an interest in shell based headwear, so I decided they were friends. Abbi's favorite idol is obviously Big Man, since he's the only larger unconventional idol in a sea of skinny athletic idols, and I think that speaks to Abbi's body type specifically.

The name Abbi is obviously a reference to Abalone, and I like using Abigail as a boy name for a teeny weeny bit of gender non-conformity because my favorite Abigail is the one from Street Fighter 5 (my beautiful boy). The spelling is deliberately weird for fun, but it also suggests that Abbi is a foreigner with a foreign name that only happens to sound like the English name Abigail (Abbi has some use as an actual name in East Europe, I believe).

So I had made the whole concept and I showed it to my wife with no context and she just goes "what a cute girl" and I thought that was absolutely fantastic. I didn't really try very hard to leave strong gender indicators on Abbi, and I was shooting for a little bit of ambiguity anyways, so the fact that Abbi seems to read a bit feminine struck a chord with me. It's the most organic trans narrative I can imagine, my OC, literally assigned male by me at birth, seems to be presenting female/androgynous without me knowing, and I thought, if now's not the time to make a trans OC, then when?

So now Abbi has she/them pronouns and is NB transfem. That's the fun of design sometimes. Sometimes OC's organically gain different gender identities mid development, and I don't really understand why or how, but it's more fun to respect that change than try to fight it. Art is more interesting that way.

[j-exclamationmark-l]

Community for me is a weird topic.

I grew up always feeling like I didn't belong - too Asian for the white community, not the "correct" type of Asian for most Asians (Korean people were especially cruel to me in Washington). Even now, I'm too white to be accepted in Asia, which was something I wasn't really expecting before I came here. My dad even made me feel very not at home. I guess what I'm saying is, I had no feeling of community.

My partner is showing me the British drama Doc Martin and the thought of everyone in a small town knowing and recognizing you sounds absolutely mortifying to me. I freak out when my favorite shop says "long time no see." I feel uncomfortable knowing staff at a supermarket notices and comments on the fact I drink a certain type of coffee. On a weird level I kind of proudly held myself to a Parks and Rec Ron Swanson standard - ah, here's a character who knows just how I feel, and he's an admirable and independent man with many characteristics I admire, so clearly being afraid of community is good. I openly told my partner walking into a shop and being greeted by name sounded like a nightmare to me. I said I like Tokyo because there are so many people here that I feel it's easier to not be of enough notice to interact with.

Sometimes my partner browses Tiktok. Today I was just watching his timeline with him when I noticed there were a lot of foreigners coming here complaining about the way they're treated. It's not just Tiktok, for example yesterday on YouTube he started playing a long video by a white girl complaining that Japanese people don't want to sit next to foreigners on trains. There are so many of these videos of foreigners coming here and either thinking they'll immediately be accepted into the community, or worse, think that being foreign makes them a kind of unicorn that's allowed to break these understood social norms and get away with it. My "favorite" is white men who get upset that Japanese women get mad when they cheat, they think they should get away with it because they think they're the only white man in Japan. I've even been messaged by men from the Yokosuka navy base (who didn't clock me as foreign as well) immediately treating me like shit because they think Japanese women are more likely to put up with it (think passport bros).

It struck me today that it bothered me because these people who are complaining have probably never experienced never fitting in to a community before. They don't bother to learn the rules and accepted behaviors here, a lot of them don't care or think it's fine because everyone should understand they come from a different community with different rules. I know there is some leeway we should be granted but a lot of the complaints I see I think could be solved by just being more aware and polite. Don't get me wrong, I hate the police as much as anyone, but I know better than to start a fight with cops and insult them to their face when they're holding your ID.

I see foreigners come here and say there should be more western food and fewer izakayas. I knew a girl who cried once because we didn't want to go to McDonald's for dinner with her. I have low tolerance for people who come here because they like anime and then make fun of Japanese food (don't get me wrong disliking just natto or being uncomfortable with raw fish is fine but when you meet people who hate everything except McDonald's and expect you to go with them every time to get the same food you can get anywhere else it gets obnoxious).

It just feels like foreigners are coming here and not respecting the culture here and wanting to impose their own culture... I came here because I liked this culture. I came here knowing I'd have to adapt and learn a language and learn a different set of social skills, I accepted all of that when I made the decision to move here.

I like the architecture. I like the art. I like the music. I love kanji. I love the flow of the language. I love the food, I love the fashion, I love the beauty in the nature here. I feel safe. I've tripped on the sidewalk and had people rush to help me. I had a man chase me down because he saw me drop my phone and he gave it back to me. When I first moved to Osaka, an old lady dropped everything to help me navigate the trains. I love how I can take the last train home, the first train at 5am home, and despite having had bad experiences here before, I'm not scared to walk home by myself.

In America, I remember owning fu dog statues that were stolen off our property. How? Each one was hella heavy. We also had fish statues. We had to hide them after a while because despite being up the driveway, up the porch and in front of our door, people always stuffed garbage in the fishs' mouths. I accepted as a teen I would be sexually harassed by my neighbors on the short walk from my bus stop to my house. I had a friend from Mexico here in Japan marvel how people felt safe enough to leave things like chairs outside of restaurants because in Mexico leaving things out was an invitation to have it stolen.

I'm so glad I don't have to deal with those things! I'm so glad in Japan there isn't really a culture of stealing or littering and I feel so safe most of the time. I don't want other cultures imposed over this one.

This is getting long and I have a lot to say on this subject but I don't know how to articulate it properly. But it's also 1am so I'll wrap it up here.

[reginaregen]

Perpetual-vier

Elena’s inexplicable emotional state continued the next morning, but she had projects and assignments to submit. I need to pull myself together, she thought. After making the quickest breakfast she could, she left the house. She checked the time—12 PM. The luxurious brands just below her neighborhood often attracted tourists. She was used to the crowds, but when she saw the last person she expected, she had to quicken her pace. Zemo was standing on the sidewalk with a blonde woman with blue eyes, around the same height as him, looking at something across the street. People around them might have thought they were just friends—there was that much distance between them—but Elena’s heart burned with the truth. She quickened her pace, leaving them behind and turning away from the street. The woman's tall stature, long blonde hair, and blue eyes would haunt Elena’s sleep for a long time.

*   *   *

Bucky whistled as he looked at the girl he’d matched with on Tinder. “Elena, huh? What’s a sweet girl like you doing in this den of wolves?”

The truth was, Elena had no business being there. Iolanda had swiped right on Bucky after a string of absurd matches on the profile she’d created. She thought if she could set Elena up with a date, it would distract her from Zemo. So she had made a Tinder profile without asking Elena. When she saw Bucky’s age, she rolled her eyes. God, Elena is such a daddy magnet. On the other hand, the guys in her own age group trying to match with her were terrible. Some had even written directly on their profile, Looking for a one-night stand.

Bucky's profile was mysterious, which made her a bit nervous. And his gaze looked like it could freeze the sun. She shrugged, “Sorry, Elena. You’ll have to make do with this for now.”

*   *   *

They were in the kitchen. The man poured olive oil into the pan and reached for the vegetables on the cutting board.

“How about we go to the Asian restaurant?”

Zemo gave a brief glance at Svetlana, who was asking a question that was really more of a command. “I want to eat at home, Svetlana. I’m not in the mood to socialize.”

Svetlana laughed. “When have you ever been in the mood to socialize? Should I make a reservation?”

“Make it for one because I’m staying home.”

She huffed and puffed and, seeing Countess in her path, yelled, “Get out of my way, you flea bag!” and stormed out of the house. Countess jumped not onto the counter but onto one of the barstools by the island, as Zemo had taught her, and meowed at him, as if telling him something. Zemo listened to her seriously and sighed heavily. “I think Elena would have liked you too, and she wouldn’t have minded spending the evening with us at home, but she’s a young and beautiful girl. I’m sure she’s doing something more appropriate for her age with her boyfriend right now, Countess.”

The cat meowed in discontent.

“Do you really think I’d have a chance with Elena? For God’s sake! I’m old, ugly, and weird. She... she’s all the beautiful things I know. Sweet, cheerful, cool…”

As Countess meowed as if laughing, Zemo frowned. “Hey! You’re the teenager! I don’t have a crush on my student, don’t be ridiculous.”

When Countess meowed again, Zemo scowled. “If you want to keep eating high quality cat food, we’re dropping this subject here.”

Okay, that was enough to shut Countess up, but she wasn’t going to let it go entirely.

*   *   *

Bucky moved inside Svetlana, who was leaning against the kitchen counter, while she looked at his Tinder on his phone.

“Elena? Did we just match with this sweet baby?”

Bucky groaned, winding her ponytail around his hand. “Not we matched, I matched. I told you, Svetlana. Unlike your boyfriend, I don’t share my women.”

It had been nearly a year since Svetlana had lied to Bucky about having an open relationship with Zemo and become his friend with benefits.

“That’s a shame,” Svetlana moaned. “I would have liked to bring this baby into our bed, Barnes.”

“I don’t do threesomes. But if your boyfriend is as weird as you say, ask him.”

Svetlana laughed and moaned with pleasure as Bucky hit a deep spot, her finger gliding over the screen. “Look at how sweet this girl is. Do you really think she’d be interested in a weirdo like Zemo? On the other hand, you and that divine body of yours could totally mess with her mind.”

As Bucky pulled out of her, Svetlana cursed. “What the hell!?”

“I’m going to finish alone, you can leave. It feels like you’re drooling more over this girl than me. I don’t like it.” He reached out and took his phone from her hand. “Thanks for coming, darling. And don’t forget to thank your boyfriend for sharing you.”

Svetlana gave him the middle finger, adjusted her skirt, and got up. “You’re disgusting.”

“Says the woman with a boyfriend who shares her.”

[murfpersonalblog]

@nashvillethotchicken Your TAGS! <3

ALL OF THE ABOVE.

I think a problem some people have is looking at Loumand as being BETTER than Loustat, when really, Armand & Lestat are two sides of the same toxic coin. Louis' taste in men is TRASH. It's not about who's better/best for Louis, it's about who Louis REALLY WANTS MOST--who makes him happier at the end of the day.

Putting aside the extremely high levels of SUS wrt Armand's culpability in Lou's memory gaps & Claudia & Madeleine's murder, Armand still enables Louis--to an unhealthy degree. Too much of a good thing is BAD. Armand's letting Lou bury his trauma, not face it & make peace with it--he rushes to shut down the interview over and over, while Daniel's busy poking deeper & deeper holes.

Louis: It's his job-- Armand: It's his drug. He's reveling in it; you should end it!

Armand's H A T E D this interview since jump; tryna control Louis the whole time, so he doesn't "act out." He physically restrains Lou, hands digging into his shoulders--supportive, sure; or a show of strength/power, depending how you look at it.

FREEDOM & EQUALITY are a core tenants for Louis. He wanted to live freely out in the open, as a gay man who loved reading books and going to operas and dancing and wearing soft cardigans and raising a family--not having to hide his true nature (just like Lestat wanted to be SEEN and KNOWN). And Lou wanted to be treated fairly & equally--respected as a Black man; not looked down on & oppressed (making it SO interesting that Armand's a darker-skinned Asian now).

It's been well established that BOTH the maximalist NOLA townhouse AND minimalist Dubai penthouse were cages. They were built so that Louis could be HAPPY; but they became warped & twisted over time as LOUIS refused to leave (desperately holding on, then resenting his NOLA "crypt"/Dubai "coffin"); and then COULDN'T leave even when he wanted to. And a lot of fans actually suspect that LOUIS designed the Dubai penthouse, to be his cage/prison--or IMO his MENTAL ASYLUM.

So what's happening b/t Loumand's SO complex; I'm not really sure what's going on TBH. But Armand clearly wants Lou happy, doing what he wants, free & fun. Being cooped up in the penthouse is NOT what book!Armand had in mind when he was off making Night Island & Trinity Gate; which is why the Dubai situation is so WEIRD.

Armand AND Lestat knew that although they wanted "anything for Louis," letting Lou do whatever he wanted was iffy, prone to self-denial. Despite his heavy-handed/oppressive approach, Les didn't want Lou taking the easy way out by settling for less & consigning himself to some bleak & boring life. Les' methods just SUCKED.

Like sure--Louis' eating fancy rare fox breeds or whatever; it's still an animal. It's not HUMAN blood. It's not HEALTHY--especially not the human food Louis eats. What's this farce Louis' playing into?

How much power does Armand have or not to help/stop Louis?

MANY people have pointed out that Armand wants Louis to just GET OVER IT already--stfu about Claudia/Lestat & be happy with ME!

It's almost like Armand's uber-enabling Louis as a way of over-correcting for the oppressive way Lestat treated Louis--but neither one of those are the right way to treat someone you're supposed to be in an EQUAL relationship with.

Lestat spoiled Louis just like Armand does--but the difference was that unlike Louis finally getting sick of Lestat's BS & dumping him--Armand finally got sick of Louis' BS and dumped HIM.

TBH Louis just needs to be single, cuz neither Lestat nor Armand were in the right headspaces to actually HELP him. And it's all mind games, cuz Louis CAN'T get into anyone's head:

Lestat had so much power over Louis as his Maker, but he's right that not reading e/o's thoughts was humbling--they're supposed to be OPEN & willing to communicate--on an EQUAL level--rather than always relying on the Dark Gift & taking their telepathy for granted.

Just look at Louis & Claudia. For all that they were constantly mind reading, Claudia had actually blocked Louis from reading her thoughts; she was way better at it than he was. Although Lou's mind was an open book, she still had no clue what he thought/felt/wanted, or just how much he loved Lestat & DIDN'T want him dead; regardless of how mad/scared/abused Louis was.

It was the same with Armand. book!film!Louis SUCKED at mind-reading--Armand's STRONGEST gift. But for all Armand's ability to read Louis' mind, he couldn't do a single bloody thing to make Louis happy. And Louis couldn't make Armand happy either.

Nothing can grow in a toxic/dead environment without being tainted. Armand called Louis a "dried up...dehydrated rose." Armand finally acted selflessly & set Louis FREE--by dumping him--so that he could FINALLY start growing.

Armand COULDN'T help Lou--"Is there anything else you want of me, anything else you require?" LOUIS needed to chose what/who he wanted. LOUIS had to be the one to decide that he wasn't gonna be depressed anymore, or blame others for his failings, or allow people to dictate his life for him.

But that character growth only came after Merrick. And it wasn't until PLatRoA that Lestat was in a position to finally start doing right by Louis, cuz he needed to get his BS together & grow as a person WORTHY of Louis' love, too.

Assad mentioning the tenderness between Louis and Armand again and how it's a major part of how their relationship is different from the one Louis and Lestat had... I find it fascinating how even from the little we've seen Lestat and Armand being almost opposites is emphasized, and that they genuinely seem to be different and it's not just Armand hiding that he's just like Lestat or something. Lestat doesn't reveal his powers to Louis and Claudia; Armand is very open about being more powerful than Louis. Lestat becomes resentful when Louis is depressed and doesn't want to leave their house; Armand accepts it and just tries to fulfill Louis' every wish. Lestat is extremely jealous; Armand seemingly accepts Louis having sex with other men and they maybe even had threesomes. Lestat and Louis' relationship had so much obvious toxicity and violence and they argued constantly; Armand and Louis seemingly rarely argue and their relationship comes across almost symbiotic which is reflected in them being able to read each other's thoughts and communicate telepathically, whereas Lestat and Louis were permanently shut off from each other's minds.

At least outwardly Louis' relationship with Armand seems much more affectionate and tender than his relationship with Lestat, but at the same time there's a question what is going on underneath. It's crucial that Armand is different from Lestat, his relationship with Louis is different from Louis' and Lestat's relationship, and that he hasn't and most likely won't hurt Louis in the same ways Lestat did. But we know it's still not really a happy and healthy relationship either and i'm very curious to see more of what it's like and their unique type of fuckedupness. I think Louis having a relationship that is unhealthy in a completely different way than his previous one is much more interesting writing choice than repeating the exact same patterns would've been

[082112]

Last week in Alaska. Yesterday I went about town and bought souvenirs and such and spent a ton (curse you, Sitka prices), went to the science center and bought 3 halibut plushies, got brunch with Jayden at Wildflour and talked about visiting her in Toronto, giggled about crossiants…

I ate alone at Beak and was the only patron while a Celtic music group riffed in the back (they sounded fantastic, they looked to mostly be over 50, they looked so happy and I was thinking wow life is just marvelous and music is a part of living well, and I ought to pick this up too, I’m excited for every year of my life!) and my food came out and it looked like Norwegian peasant food and I was SOOO PISSED. But it was actually amazing. The smoked salmon had a sweetness to it that was so good!

And I also visited Fate Accompli and said hi to Olivia again. Rachel (the owner) asked my name but recognized my face, and I chatted briefly with her and her husband Ken about moving to SF and leaving Sitka, spent a bit there, and as I was making to leave she gave me a hug and told me to come around if I was ever in town again. I was happy! It feels good to be seen and to be welcomed by other people. And Olivia is very soft and cute.

Afterwards I went to Mean Queen with Jazz and Ben and Rebecca, and then we went to the monthly grind, which is this music variety show in Sitka. It was John Denver themed, but it took me literally 20 minutes to realize that. It was cute!

Afterwards me and Jazz and Ben went back and played Brawlhalla.

It’s my last week in Sitka and I’m feeling all sorts of affection and nostalgia for the place and people now, and I know part of it is the heart wanting to like places before you leave and part of it is the brain seeing all the good things, finally, but it still is really nice nonetheless. And sometimes I’m like MY GOD I WANNA STAY FOR SPRING SEMESTER but I also think it’s good I’ve signed a job offer and am also gonna try out something new this spring too (moving to SF, SWE, industry, etc). And it’s good I’m leaving with affection and happiness for this place. I feel like I’m at a point where I’m happy with my experience here and glad I came without any of the haunting deep pains that I had in earlier weeks.

Two weeks ago now I took a walk with Caroline after a particularly awkward class where we were talking about communities and I burst out: I hate the community I grew up in! It was so racist and hurt me so deeply! And they don’t deserve my love or my time. I don’t want to help them! And that night I took a walk with her and talked about racism and what I experienced and all the weird things I do now (counting the frequency which I talk in classes as to not be perceived, worrying constantly if my teachers see me as a real human being and not an echo of another Asian student, because that’s happened so many times) and sobbed on the docks IN FRONT OF HER (humiliating) and said: I wish I could’ve resolved this cooly and in silence and told you all of this without crying, and impressed you with my maturity and strength and deep regard for human emotion and poeticism, but I just look stupid. And she said, well, it’s okay, and you impress me with your thoughtfulness instead, and I said, well, I wish I could monologue dramatically and cooly to you about the state of race and personal experience and whatever instead of crying my eyes out, and she said, I would hate that, so there’s that. And I feel better after doing that. Having shared it with one person after keeping it away for so long is, in a sense, like sharing it with the world.

And I texted deets: the main lesson I’ve learned here is that it’s good to live with yourself. Life is easier when you don’t hate yourself for who you are all the time, and honestly it’s so true, and I’m so great, I don’t deserve to hate myself all the time! I was thinking to myself walking back along the dock the other day about the me of high school, and monologuing internally: I was crusty and bad-postured and irritable and insecure and terrified and fluttery and prone to acne, and I was magnificent. I had so much heart and saw the world with illumination and joy and infinite potential. I was a magnificent person, not without flaws, but magnificent nonetheless.

I don’t think it’s possible to live a life without regrets. But I would like to look back on myself and see the good at every point in my life, because I think everyone deserves that alongside humility.

[now-we-say-c0ral]

March 20, 2023

Had a very good night's sleep. Just sleeping next to him makes everything alright. Everything's good when I'm in his arms. I remember telling him yesterday afternoon that I know I'm being clingy but I don't care because I can't be like this when we're apart and he has to suck it up or suffer the consequences. Teehee! Woke up at quarter pass 5am and cuddled for like a good minute. Told myself that time's up. Time to not be clingy anymore. I'm not being that clingy anymore and I have to have a moment to tune it down a few notches before finally turning it all off. I don't know.. I'm weird. That's just how I'm built. He doesn't have problems about being needy and clingy because he's just built that way and I'm not. I think I could just text him once in one day and that's enough for him while I need constant, unyielding affection. I'm changing that about me. I have to. Not everything revolves around me and that's reality.

He packed me my lunch and we went to the station. He kissed me good bye as I caught another train and I went home to Kingston. I feel better leaving now. Maybe because I know that soon we won't be apart anymore but I just think that training my mind to top my anxiety and also writing about them are slowly working.

Day's been fine. Arrived at Kingston around 7am and did a TPB list in the morning which went swimmingly well and circulated the whole afternoon on a Urology list. Didn't scrub for any case because I don't want to risk fainting. I don't tolerate blades and penises well. Last time I scrubbed world went gray and I fainted. Literally. I kid you guys not. I went a little extra today because I feel like eyes are all on me. I have this impression that people are just waiting for me to bend and yield because of last week's fiasco about the needle prick injury and some other shit I cannot discuss here but let's just say that it's rather serious. No complaints, no blunder, and I did my job well today. I'm on LD shift tomorrow and I have to suck it up though I don't really like the shift. This was one of those rare days that my squad aren't at work. It was kind of lonely. I heard back from my GOSH manager and said that he has to see if anyone's free to give me a tour this Wednesday otherwise he asked for an alternative date which I replied that I'm available next Monday. GOSH HR representative to just email her my new BRP once it's arrived. I can't wait to further my application. I'll sign the contract right away. Went to buy some chicken katsu at Horangi, my favorite asian takeaway stall, here in Kingston and the seller told me that even though I look at the other dishes they have, I still order their chicken katsu. She noticed. I'll miss Horangi Kingston when I move. Legit, they have the best Katsu in all of Kingston High Street. Went to Aldi to buy some mung sprouts to which I'll top with the chicken liver I bought from Kingston Food Centre. Was about to do legs but the machines were being used so did arms, chest, and abs today. I think I'll wake up to sore arms tomorrow. I think I overdid it. Caught my gym crush eye fucking me. You're hot but no. I'm so conceited to say this but this isn't the first time. Ego boost, yes. That's all there is to it. Caught the bus home and now I'm cooking tomorrow's lunch. Kinda obsessed with SOS by SZA and Sometimes by Kodaline.

Today's thoughts are all about trust. I'll trust. I'll worry less. It's going to be good for the both of us. In another perspective of my life, I'm also thinking about booking a diving tour soon. To be fucking honest I don't know how and when and most importantly how much but I want to see the ocean again. I'll bring Eddie. He can't swim but I can.

[ultramaga]

Not to mention...

I used to love the vending machine chicken sandwich I would have at Sydney uni. I think Macquarie had one too.

As a kid, the concept of the vending machine amazed me. Put in money, instant cold food or hot drink. Try explaining that to the people before capitalism.

I don't think it exists anymore but there was an Asian shop next to Hornsby station across the road that sold hot chicken rolls with gravy.

Very messy, but delicious on a cold winter's day.

Communists want you to forget that small business is also a part of capitalism. It's hardly homogeneous.

If I want a chicken and pineapple sandwich, toasted, I can have that with my cappuccino at the local cafe, and sit listening to music or writing Tumblr posts, and the staff will try to make me happy. Because capitalism.

They don't do that in communist countries, because the State owns the business and pays you the same regardless of how good you are at your job. Why bother making customers happy? If there were none, you would still be paid!

Tales from behind the old iron curtain are consistent. Everyone was miserable and mean. Nobody struggles for excellence. Anything you do will be taken by the State. What is the point of being creative?

But under capitalism, the business competes, and the ones that make customers happy have the advantage.

They will work at the combination of price and presentation, and the more money you can spend, the better everything gets. Colours, seating, music, lighting over food, everything is thought about and maximised. If someone makes a better coffee machine for an affordable price, they will buy it.

Year after year, we have more variety of foods and drinks. And if you have more money to spend, that explodes. Not to mention...

Innovation like home or office delivery! Holy cow, has that taken off! I loathe the Uber eats sound at the café but there's no denying it has worked well, and I expect drone delivery will be standard soon.

Imagine popping back in time to the 1950s, and telling them all the weird and wild types of coffee and tea, not to mention delicious freshly made rolls, they can have delivered to an office from just an ordinary cafe.

Heck, the cappuccino in Australia exists because of Italian immigration. Incredibly popular.

It pretty much came in from being exotic and rare to being the standard beverage. Growing up, everyone pretty much had tea, two sugars, milk. Now I would not be surprised to drive into some remote location and still get a decent cappuccino.

I remember the coffee we had as a kid. The sugar was there to mask the taste, and you drank it because the alternative was falling asleep, possibly while driving.

If you were well off, you could grind up and brew better than the foul instant coffee, but the common folk at work popped open their giant cans, put a teaspoon of the horrid sticky stuff in a cup, poured in literally boiling water (I have had so many mild burns over the years from the office boiler), and drank with nose pinched.

Capitalism is awesome. The free market, the competition, the rewards for innovation and good customer service, these are things those in communist countries can only dream of.

Yeltsin knew communism was doomed when he went to an American supermarket. We are surrounded by quality and quantity that they can never have.

But the Leftists never want you to compare like with like, to compare capitalism and communism.

Instead, they are frauds, comparing reality to the fantasy, free stuff in exchange for doing nothing, a state that has never seen occurred except for the infants and the elderly.

Leftists are forever trying to claw backwards, to being a baby, not even having to wipe their own arses, Mommy State just giving them everything, no work, no demands, no mind.

Meanwhile, the same Leftists say babies aren't really alive. Oh, sweet irony!

Cause you know darn that Capitalism and their…

*checks notes*

VARIETY OF FAST FOOD CHICKEN SANDWICHES

[kimbap-r0ll]

Hi hi, darling! (I hope you’re not uncomfortable with me calling you that, but if you are, please do tell!) I dunno if you’re still answering asks buuuut…

Is there a certain smell/taste/sound/song (or anything) that is just so comforting to you? Something others might find quite normal and have no deeper emotions attached to it?

Sending much love!!

Hi! Yes no worries about the nickname and my requests are still open, sending love to you as well! Thank you for the ask!

Hm, I never really thought this out, but I just chose to answer all of the senses you mentioned with the first things that came to my head.

Smell - Library/old books. I don't know why but I used to love going to libraries all the time when I was younger, and books were a big part of my childhood so I was always around them. There's a specific library I still find comfort in, and it still has the distinct book scent that I like. Perhaps Chrollo would enjoy books there too, but who knows haha

Taste - Ochazuke (お茶漬け) - This is a Japanese dish that I grew up on! I didn't know if there was an English translation to this but I always called it "ocha-zuke" and explain it to people unfamiliar with it. It's basically hot water with tea and some traditional things you would find in a Japanese dish like umeboshi. Whenever I go somewhere with Japanese foods I tend to buy a bunch of packets of these things so I can make them in the future

Sound - Pigeons in the morning? Like there's these birds that go "coo coo" in a really low voice, sort of reminds me of Brewster haha. But I used to wake up to these sounds a lot, but now there's like no pigeons where I am so it's a bit weird not waking up to it ;-;

Song - "Amairo No Kami No Otome" ("亜麻色の髪の乙女") by Hitomi Shimatani. It's a really old song, but it was a song I always heard when I was younger. It's really nice, I remember my parents explaining to me what the song was about and now I just know the song right away from like the first second of hearing it. Check it out if you like older Jpop, it's really catchy!

Those are my takes at least, thank you for the asks once again, it was fun to reflect on myself ^-^

[thepaintedlady00]

can you write a dream blurb where he meets the reader at the park and the reader takes dream to sushi for lunch ?

Absolutely! I hope you like it! Its unedited though so if y'all see mistakes I'm sorry! 😂

You sat on the park bench, book in hand and eyes lazily rolling over the words, but in truth you hardly noticed them or even the book as your mind constructed the beautiful landscape those paragraphs described and built the people the story surrounded. You'd always had an active imagination, something you took great pride in and something that led you to this exact moment.

You'd met the stranger in your dreams. He never really spoke at first, more looking around and observing everything before vanishing. It was weird but not completely out of the ordinary so you just adapted to seeing him. When he finally introduced himself as Morpheus, Dream of the Endless and king of dreams everything changed. He'd shown you The Dreaming, introduced you to Lucienne and Merv and Matthew and he'd spent every night at your side, listening to your wild antics and even reading your favorite books just to speak to you about them. 

A part of you was still slightly hesitant, thinking that perhaps it was all in your head. It was something you brought up often until last night. The memory made a chill of anticipation rush up your spine.

"This can't be real."

Morpheus sighed from across the library table. "It is."

You narrowed your eyes. "Seriously, though, I clearly have constructed this advanced fantasy."

"You'd give yourself such credit?" He teased, not looking up from his book. "That's quite confident of you."

With a scoff you tossed the closest pencil at him. "Ass. You're the one always telling me I have a brilliant imagination."

"You do, just not as brilliant as my own."

"Now who's confident?" You mocked.

His book settled loudly against the table as he looked up at you with a sigh. "How shall I prove to you this is all real, once and for all?"

"Come with me to lunch." You suggested. "In the real world, while I'm awake."

Morpheus regarded you with cautious eyes of starlight. "This will end your incessant dismissal?"

"Absolutely."

"Very well then. I shall meet you in the park closest to your home."

And here you were. Waiting. For fifteen minutes now. The book had been a good idea to keep the ever present thoughts of I told you so and you look like an absolute fool under control. It had not, however, been a good idea when it came to noticing the lithe figure clad in black approaching you. If you'd been paying more attention you would have had time to work out exactly what you were going to say before he stood directly in front of you.

"Hello, little dreamer," the sudden deep timber of his voice started your eyes directly up to his. He was here… and you were wide awake.

For a minute all you could do was stare, book open and eyes wide, but one you'd snapped out of your haze you pinched your arm, just to be safe. "Holy shit."

He tilted his head a bit. "Are you quite finished with that?"

"Yeah," you said, standing and awkwardly holding your hand out to him. "Hi."

Morpheus almost laughed at the far too formal gesture, but still took your hand and pressed a soft kiss to your knuckles. "Hello."

"Wow," you whispered blushing. "You're real."

"As I've been trying to inform you for months now." He replied smugly. "I believe I agreed to accompany you to lunch."

"Right!" You gestured to the street behind you. "It's this way. You like sushi right? God, I didn't even think to ask what you'd prefer, sorry!"

He shook his head, offering you his arm and walking beside you. "I do not eat often. But, I'm willing to try whatever you've chosen."

"You're not allergic to fish right?" You asked, still nervous.

"Relax, little dreamer," the richness of his voice felt so much more… Well… More here.

You'd picked your favorite sushi place, a small storefront owned by a sweet Asian family. They made the best food, the food you always sought out when looking for a quiet moment of warm and comfort. To you it was a beautiful place to go and eat and read if the mood struck, but now with the king of dreams on your arm it felt smaller. God you hoped he wasn't offended by such simplicity. 

Morpheus was oblivious to your internal dilemma, instead finding every tiny trinket and wall hanging fascinating. He was relieved that you'd chosen a small, intimate location where the two of you could enjoy each other's company similarly to how you did in his realm. He sat across the table from you and let you order whatever you wanted. Watching you twiddle your fingers in front of you and speak to those around with such familiarity made him feel at ease.

"So," you started. "I guess I owe you an apology."

"Hardly," he insisted. "Your confusion was understandable. I should have come to you here long ago to dissuade your doubt's."

"True, but still, I'm sorry."

"I accept your apology."

With the formalities done the tension seemed to lift and you two were immediately back to speaking like you normally did. He asked you about the book you were reading and truly listened as you gushed about it. Unbeknownst to you this was one of his favorite things, listening to your passionate speeches.

When the food arrived he watched you eat a few times before trying anything. You watched him closely, helping him with the chopsticks and keeping him from the wasabi, though you'd been extremely tempted to test the limits of the immortal being with a little trial by fire. Morpheus made no clear indication on whether he enjoyed it or not, no faces or noises, but he continued to eat and would later insist that he did in fact like it. But, for now it was just nice to sit with him and know for a certainty he was real. 

[sohin-ace]

Jolyne - No Ordinary Girl

Mermaid Y/N x Surfer Jolyne

Today was a particularly fitting day to go to the beach. Jotaro had taken Jolyne, Hermes and Foo Fighters to the shore. He mostly went for some observation and the girls decided they would take advantage of the nice weather for some surfing.

It was not long after they arrived and started installing themselves that Jolyne and Hermes' eyes fell into very familiar faces.

Annasui, upon seeing the group, walked towards the girls with a confident stance, making sure his long hair was flowing in the wind.

"Oh look who we have here. The ladies victory." Annasui exclaimed, before completely falling heart-eyed, his voice and tone softening, dreamy even, at the sight of his object of worship. "Hi Jolyne~"

"Oh! Weather Report's there! Hi Weas!" Jolyne called out to the older man arranging a parasol a few feet behind, her completely ignoring the pink haired-male that seemed to have come with him. He waved shortly at Jolyne in response.

"Anyways, what are you guys up to?" Hermes asked, sipping on some lime flavored granita.

"Well, as you can see..." He pointed at the ocean, "We just wanted to take a day to work out a bit, but the waves are real nice today."

He leaned in not so subtly towards Jolyne, despite Hermes' evident judging gaze.

"But you know what else is real nice today?" He brought his hand up to cup Jolyne's chin, but before he could even say or do anything, Jolyne leaned away and pointed behind him.

"Oh wow! My dad's coming back with drinks!" She called nonchalantly, looking behind Annasui like he was more transparent than air itself.

"...! DRINKS?! DRINKS!!" Foo Fighter gasped, pushing the feminine man off to the side with such force, he fell and slid against the sand.

"Hey, Jojo," Hermes tapped her friend's shoulder, "Let's show these pendejos how girls ride waves."

The Asian American smirked, eager to show who's boss and always ready to follow on her best friend's mischief. "I'm racing you then."

"Pfft, I won't go easy girlfriend." The Mexican cracked her knuckles and grabbed her plank.

After surfing for long enough and being outran by Jolyne's stamina, Hermes decided to go back and sunbathe next to F.F's who was playing cutely with sand.

Jolyne glided full speed over the water, the wind and droplets of salty water refreshing her skin. More than competition, Jolyne loved the acceleration, the adrenaline, the sweet fresh air through her long hair. When she was surfing, Jolyne's heart lightened up and her mind purged of any negative thoughts, anxiety, fears.

She was at peace.

Before she could enjoy the sweet taste of her peace of mind though, she caught up to a blond surfer in front of her who she recognized as she got closer. Oh god, not him of all people.

"Oh, hey! Isn't that the sexiest surfer in all Miami?" Romeo teased, admiring the girl who gained up on him, "Not bad, look at you go! Who knew my little Jojo would be so talented, hot damn!"

Jolyne frowned and clicked her tongue. She swore if she wasn't so focused on staying in balance, she would drown him on the spot. He laughed obnoxiously, satisfied with being a disgusting excuse of a human.

"Romeo, I swear to fuckin-"

Before she could even finish her sentence, something, a gigantic fish tail appeared out of the wave and flicked itself right accross the blonde, slapping him off of his plank with a painful sound.

"HUAARGHH-" He screamed before crashing into the water with the splash and disappearing behind Jolyne.

"O-OH MY GOD!" She gasped, both surprised by the sudden turn of events, and incredibly scared for her life, thinking some kind of hostile shark was in the shore currently, which was to report immediately.

The moment she decided to take a turn and leave as fast as she could, warning the others to get the hell out of here, a shadowy form within the water followed her along the wave.

Foolishly curious, Jolyne looked at it, not without her heart hammering in her chest at the potential danger she was facing.

What she saw was not a sight she'd have ever expected to ever see in all her 19 years. Her legs shook at the shock and she almost completely fell over her board.

Gliding along the water right next to her, right inside the tall wave, was the figure of... a girl.

Or was it a girl? It couldn't be. She looked human at first glance, but the more Jolyne's gaze moved sideways she noticed the long and impressive fish tail replacing what were supposed to be legs.

Jolyne's jaw felt slack. She felt like she was hallucinating. Believe it or not, she had not smoked or taken any recreative substances beforehand, but she truly wished she had because that would have at least explained what her eyes were showing her.

The girl swimming and following her only smiled, waving cutely with webbed hands, as if amused by Jolyne's disbelieving reaction and wide eyes.

"W-w-w.... What the fuck..???" Jolyne finally spoke after rebooting her entire brain, "No fucking way-...! A mermaid??!! A real one??!"

Like a bad trick from fate, the wave Jolyne was trying her hardest to not get swallowed by, seemed to grow weaker and weaker, shortening in size.

Jolyne saw the mermaid slowly retreat away in an elegant swim, her form vanishing into the deep blue.

"Wait, no!" The surfer called, almost desperate to have such a mystical meeting and ethereal moment be so short lived.

She reached her hand out to the creature, unsure of what she was even trying to do, but the force of the current got the best of her, and Jolyne lost balance, falling forward with nothing to hang onto for purchase.

Jolyne splashed onto the water and the wave died with her hope of ever living such a dream again.

"Ooohh dang it! You were almost there!" Hermes called out from the shore, her voice booming enough for Jolyne to hear as she broke into the surface.

"Fuck...." Jolyne cursed, hanging onto her board.

She felt defeated. Not because she couldn't ride that wave to the very end as she was expected to with her skill level, but rather because she couldn't immortalize that beautiful moment.

She blankly climbed onto her board again and barely even paddled her way back to land, too out of it to do so.

Was that even real? That had to be, right? She saw the mermaid. She saw her hair, her skin tone shined-on by the sun. She saw the scales over her skin, the fins along her arms and tail.

She saw her attack Romeo, he must have seen her too, Jolyne pondered.

"Aaah the champion is back!" F.F cheered as Jolyne finally walked back, drenched and with her plank under one arm. "I made a sandcastle for our ocean queen!"

"Thanks Foo..." Jolyne's small smile didn't not match her quiet tone.

"Hey, what's up, chula ? You look like you've seen a ghost, or something? You did great back there, so why the long face?" Hermes fixed the straps of Jolyne's bikini top and removed some seaweeds from her hair.

"It's just... I saw something weird it the water and I don't know..." Jolyne hesitated, "Maybe I was dreaming or something."

"Hum..." Hermes hummed in thought. "What do you think Féfé?"

"Maybe Mr. Jotaro can answer if you saw an animal? Damn, I'm thirsty." F.F stuck her tongue out, clearly expressing her thirst.

"Dude, there's water litterally everywhere here." The mexican grimaced before turning back to Jolyne. "But yeah, maybe you should ask your dad if that worries you so much."

"Uhh..."

Jolyne looked towards her father who was crouching somewhere next to some rocks, taking notes about mollusks, or so Jolyne guessed.

"Yeah, maybe not. It's fine though, no big deal." She smiled, waving her hand in dismissal.

Shrugging it all off, the girls decided to join Weather Report and Jotaro who brought food to finish the day at the beach with a relaxing touch.

And so, the day ended with an uncanny normalcy for Jolyne, who kept thinking more and more as the sun set, that it all had been in her mind. Mermaids didn't exist. It was probably a Stand user playing tricks on her.

That what she wanted to believe. When she thought of all the events that would follow, she truly wished she had spoken to her father about it. After all, if he had fought a very real vampire, then there would be no doubt that something as crazy as a mermaid could exist in her bizarre adventure.

Jolyne came back to the beach that same week. Alone, this time. She was careful to come by the time the sun started to lower in the sky and the temperature of the water and air dropped, knowing tourists and athletes would be gone by this time.

'What now?' She thought. Coming back out of sheer curiosity was a thing, but making sure she could attract the creature back to her was something else.

"Should I bring food? What do mermaids even eat? Does she like hot dogs...?" Jolyne thought out loud, looking around, secretly glad no one was here to hear her talk mad nonsense to herself like some insane crackhead.

She approached the water and drenched her feet in the small rocking waves, coming and going her way and gently splashing her. She hesitated for a moment, remembering that along with the legend of mermaids came the fact that these creatures were known to attract and enchant humans by their beauty, leading them to their inevitable death.

So maybe, Jolyne accepted, she was destined to die in the ocean.

Just as she came hip-deep into the sea, she felt a strange current shaking her legs, almost knocking her out of balance.

Before she could even process how strange it felt, she looked down into the clear water and saw no less than the same huge colorful fish tail she had seen that very day.

She gasped in realization and soon enough screamed as she felt calloused hands grab her thighs, the creature pushing herself out of the water to be met face to face with the human who had been, unbeknownst to Jolyne, her newfound fixation.

"Y-WHAAAAAHH!!!" Jolyne hollered, not expecting such a strong and surprising appearance.

The mermaid still halfway into the water, climbed and gripped up the girl's hips for leverage. She looked up at Jolyne's face, smiling wide and eyes glinting in both adoration and mischief.

"Greetings."

"HOLY CRAP-" Jolyne's voice cracked, "I mean- fuck yes! I mean-..."

Poor Jojo was completely out of it. But who could blame her, though? It was not everyday that one got to meet a real mermaid in the flesh. And certainly not such a handsy one.

She cleared her throat and mustered her most suave voice, pretending she wasn't completely flustered by the sheer beauty before her.

"Hi."

"I knew you'd come back..." The mermaid spoke, her voice almost ethereal and distant, "They always do."

Jolyne's heart wanted to stop. God, she felt burning hot and was sweating everywhere. Her voice stilled Jolyne to place in a way she couldn't explain. The legendary creature was so impossibly close to her, bodies almost touching.

She noticed she couldn't stay up overwater any other way than using Jolyne's lean body for leverage, her heavy tail anchoring her down. But the warm proximity between them and the sight of such a beautiful, rare and mystical creature right under her chest felt unreal and exciting.

Jolyne wanted to look her over for hours. Her hair texture, drenched and flowy, her skin tone glowing like gold, her holographic scales and fins shining like crazy diamonds.

"Why... Why did you...? Of all people...?" Jolyne questionned, now wondering if their first meeting in that wave was really a trick of fate, or if she was chosen in any way. "You attacked Romeo, yet you showed up to me... Why me?"

"I like beautiful humans." The mermaid smiled, her radiant features and smooth voice making Jolyne's legs weak, "You're beautiful."

The young surfer couldn't help her heart shaking and the wave of warmth spreading through her chest. If it was anyone else, she would boast her obvious beauty or maybe flip them off. But now she couldn't. Being complimented by a mythical being that was already the most gorgeous thing Jolyne had ever witnessed was truly something else

"What's your name?" Jolyne started.

"Call me Y/N."

Y/N, Jolyne's mind echoed. Cute. Even mermaids had names, she thought before realising that may be a very stupid thought to have. She didn't really know what else to expect.

"I uh, I'm Jolyne..." She looked down into the water, somewhat not daring to look at Y/N's adorable curious and sensual gaze. Oh god that was bad, she was entrancing.

"Not to be gay but...You look cute. Hot even. Can I say that? That's not weird, right? Since ya know... You're not exactly human, but you're not an animal either, like... I'm not gonna get arrested for this... I hope..."

"I'm not too familiar with human tongue, but I think Ms.Jolyne looks really pretty as well." Y/N moved to wrap an arm around Jolyne's waist, gripping her for better leverage and pointing at her chest, right in her reach. "Healthy mammals, great for feeding the young."

"Mammals...? Oh! You mean my boobs?" Jolyne glanced at her modest chest before grinning at the creature, "Aw thanks! Finally someone who likes them who's not some degenerate creep!"

Jolyne's chuckle died down and she finally took the time to look over Y/N's face. She ran a cold hand over her much warmer cheek, gliding it down to her gilled neck, mesmerized by her anatomy.

It truly was a one-in-a-lifetime meeting. Jolyne was slowly comprehending her luck to be met with a legendary sea creature like her. And a friendly one, at that.

How could this be even real? Our human knew that even though she was feeling relatively serene at the moment, the adrenaline would come down later and she would most likely cry herself to sleep.

"Hey uhm..." Jolyne was at a loss for words. There were so many things to say, but at the same time, she couldn't speak a word.

"Hm?" Y/N hummed and closed her eyes, enjoying the human's gentle touches.

Merfolks would express themselves via physical ministrations the most in the ocean, but she knew well a lot of humans did not share intimacies, or at least not before building a certain bond.

Glad that Jolyne was open to it, the sea-bound girl squeezed both her arms around the human's waist lovingly, forcing endearment on Jolyne, who felt her own heart tighten at the sweet and adorable embrace. The girls wanted to keep each other.

"Will we see each other again? I mean, I know you shouldn't be noticed by the public for your safety, but I don't know... Guess I took a liking to you or something." Jolyne mumbled, still resting her hands mindlessly around the creature's shoulders, fiddling with the ridges of her dorsal fin.

Y/N smiled, a smile that looked empty on her fish eyes, but sincere regardless. She let go of Jolyne who couldn't quite take her own hands off of her, clinging a little bit longer.

"Don't you know this, Ms. Jolyne? When human women die in the ocean, they relive as our kind."

"What? Really?" Jolyne let the mermaid get away slowly, ready to swim off to some unknown destination.

"If you want to see me again," Y/N called out cutely, waving her webbed hand like the very first time she saw Jolyne surfing, "Then perish in the ocean!"

She grinned, diving into the deep blue and splashing her tall tail strongly, giving herself a boost of speed, and disappearing away.

Jolyne could only stare into the horizon, darkening as the night arrived, stunned into place.

"...Ok, that was metal as fuck..."

H2O Just Add Water opening, but with Jolyne, Hermes and F.F

[fill-me-with-your-memes-daddy]

Watching the Rise of the Titans movie and I'll be documenting all of my thoughts/reactions here. [Spoiler Warning]

So instead of reblogging every new update, I'm just going to have this post up on my phone as I watch and type my reactions in a bullet list format.

Nari's human disguise is so cute. As someone who does have a cottagecore aesthetic, I want to cosplay her so bad

Are Skrael and/or Belroc non-binary coded? Regardless, I'm also obsessed and I want to fuck Skrael and be Belroc.

STEVE CARING ABOUT JIM BEING HURT YESSSS!!! My god his redemption has probably been one of the greatest there is because he doesn't just suddenly go from being a bully to a completely good person. You can see the gradual shift in learning better throughout the shows which is awesome.

IN NEW YOOOOOOORRRRRRRK!!!!!! CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!

The mugshot montage reminded me of season 1 of trollhunters when toby and Jim were arrested at the museum.

STRICKLER PUT A RING ON IT??? HE'S THE ONLY DILF IVE EVER ACTUALLY AGREED WAS HOT WYM I CAN'T HAVE HIM??? well I'm still really happy about his arc over the series probably one of my favorite character growths.

Eli my guy got his growth spurt!!! As an 18 year old who is still 5'0", I'm happy but envious for him

So I went into this movie without watching any trailers or promo, but I doubt anything could have prepared me for the existence of mpreg. In fact, I wasn't going to document my reactions until I saw that.

NAMURA!!!!!!!!! MY BELOVED!!!!!! I CAN STILL THIRST FOR YOU WITHOUT GUILT

The coach teacher just called the kids zoomers so I have to dock one point from my final rating just because of that. Unforgivable

Those husky animation models suck lmao

Oh fuck the titans got power ranger zords!!

God why did they include the mpreg??? This movie would have been perfect without it.... After that plot point being revisited only one time I'm already beyond done with it

Like it's bringing me back to the v*ltron days where they're was a suspiciously high amount of klance omegaverse and mpreg fics and art created and it physically hurts because Steve and Keith's voice actor is the same person meaning this is especially cursed to me since I was unfortunately in the v*ltron fandom and remember all of that

But like on another note, how old are these characters again??? I haven't checked any wikis because of spoilers but is Steve an adult??? I know aja might be technically a lot older than 18 because alien but is whatever age she is equivalent to an adult as far as emotionally and physically in Akaridion development??? IS THIS A TEEN (M)PREGNANCY IN A KIDS SHOW????

Like bruh I saw a singular post on here before going into the movie that was like "rott spoilers without context" and there was a pregnant belly but I was absolutely not expecting the actual context of it. I'll find the post after I finish and edit this post to tag the creator right here: @makoden

This entire post is just gonna be me ranting about mpreg huh

Anyway I love the whole roundtable allusion to the legends of king arthur (not the toa version but the one he's based off)

THERE'S 3 TO 5 BABIES????? I need to take a break bruh this is just too much

Alright I've taken a 30 minute break got some food and did some things i love (decompressed by tactile stimming with some owl plushies and watched some videos on my favorite owl, Garu. He lives in Japan with his owner and is a domesticated eagle owl who basically just acts like a sky cat. If anyone else needs some eye bleach, here is their YouTube channel)

Blinky and ARRRGHHH!!! saying their "if one of us doesn't make it" talk my god one of them is going to die I can see it and I will be utterly crushed. Jim can't lose another father figure and Toby can't lose his wingman again I will riot if this happens

On a similar but unrelated to the movie note, can we just talk about how toa started with Jim having 0 dads and (if strickler and blinky live to the end) will end with 2 dads? Like I just really feel happy for him that he has two dads who actually figured out how to put the past behind them to not have any infighting between them so that both of them are healthy father figures. Jim has already been through literal hell and back losing his actual humanity in the process so if he loses one of them, I'm going to be really pissed because at this point, this is just Jim torture porn. Y'all know how as SpongeBob SquarePants went on, the show just became Squidward torture porn? It's starting to feel that way for toa and I really hope they cut the shit by the ending

Jlaire is such a good ship but like I feel like it's too perfect they never disagree with each other

YESSSSSSS Someone finally doesn't treat toby like a fat waste of space who messes stuff up!!! I think out of all the characters that would have been most deserving of a rewrite, it's Toby. Sometimes I just feel he's only comic relief and any heartfelt moments he's had in the series was also born of stupidity (ie his flour baby project being unharmed was seen by him as divine intervention from his parents but was actually just Eli and Steve behind the scenes).

Ohhhhh yesssssss Archie's father!!! I was hoping I'd see him again because we got so little of him last

Ooooooooooh Asian trollmarket!!!!!

Oh never mind slavery trollmarket

Bruh titanic camelot

I feel like we're not seeing enough of the villains because I completely forgot about the power ranger zord things

NAMORA NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MY LAST CRUSHHHH

STRICKLER NO NOT YOU TOO PLEASE

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE ONLY TWO CHARACTERS I SIMP FOR ON THIS SHOW DIED WITHIN FIVE MINUTES OF EACH OTHER

THAT WHOLE ASS RANT I WROTE IS COMING TRUE FUCK THIS MOVIE THIS SERIES IS JUST JIM TORTURE PORN

WAIT JIM'S SPERM DONOR INFO?

Oh thank God I don't want to know anything about that person

For the record, I call that man Jim's sperm donor because he has no business being called a father to him. All he did was donate some swimmers to the creation of him and give him abandonment issues

Oh another blind troll elder???? This fucker is just if vendel was a bad guy

Bruh I was grieving

PACIFIC RIM WITH GUN ROBOT VEX AND THE BELROCZORD? I've never seen that movie but I know the reference

Bruh Blinky doesn't read horoscopes? Does he realize conspiracy theories are just the manly version of horoscopes?

NO DON'T KILL VEX STOP KO-ING FOUND FAMILY MEMBERS

Oh thank God he's okay

NO NOT ARCHIE AND CHARLEMAGNE OH MY GOD

oh never mind they're just gonna coup de tat I believe in them :))

But I want to see him again

But I'm glad to see vex

Yay they're in arcadia!

But yeah I wondered why the trolls and Merlin didn't keep the whole "daylight doesn't hurt trolls" feature from the eternal night but now Guillermo del Toro I see you were playing the long con in that just to kill my girl Namora :(((

Oooooh I love the animation of the Narizord over Chihuahua!! It looks very good and realistic (if only they could have put some of that into those huskies from before smh)

Bruh the character designs of the arcane order are so good I want to be them

Nari making sure the Skraelzord doesn't crush the bus

DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE

Bruh I'm just glad we finally have an answer on why arcadia had everything going on as opposed to literally anywhere else!! I always found that as a weird coincidence for plot convince.

BRUH WERE BACK TO THE MPREG IM SO JEALOUS I FORGOT ABOUT THAT EVEN THOUGH IT WAS BECAUSE I WAS GRIEVING THE LOSS OF MY LOVELIES.

Oh that's real convenient that the ninth configuration meant all of them. Way to not decide which character gets more attention. Though it probably was a smart way to not have any infighting in the fandom between each character's stan group.

Bruh I just realized where is Barbera did they just ditch her on the Camelot ship???

And where are the other trolls that migrated at the end of trollhunters s3? They said something about new jersey but obviously Jim and the other main characters got on Camelot instead.... This feels like a plot hole

And we never learned the process of how changelings are made and bonded to humans and stuff. We just know it's super painful but I'm curious ffs!!!!

THE DONT THINK BECOME HERO SPEECH ALL SAID TOGETHER!!!

BRUH THEY REALLY HAD TO SHOW HIM GIVING BIRTH??????? WAS THAT AN ABSOLUTE MUST??????

Plus the main audience for this series is little children (the rating for the movie is literally TV-Y7) so even though my adult ass is not in the target audience, I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND WHY WOULD MPREG AND ANAL BIRTH WOULD BE AN IMPORTANT THING TO 7 YEAR OLDS???? THIS IS A LITERAL FETISH HIDDEN IN KIDS CONTENT ITS ELSAGATE ALL OVER AGAIN Y'ALL 😭😭😭😭😭

Though it's probably hypocritical of me to think fetishes don't belong in kids tv when I've openly admitted to thirsting for strickler and namora

HUZZAH

NEW AMULET WAZ GOOD????

STAB THAT BITCH JIM

WAIT NO I SAID STAB NOT GET STABBED

Alright good job just missed the directions at first but you fixed it

SEVEN KIDS?????????

T O B Y ????????????

W A I T NO

N O

IS HE ACTUALLY

OH MY GOD THERE'S HOPE

NO THERE ISN'T

F U C K THIS SHIT THEY REALLY JUST HAD HIM TO BE BULLIED THEN KILLED

Y'ALL IM ACTUALLY CRYING THIS NEVER HAPPENS

I NEVER ACTUALLY GET SO EMOTIONAL OVER MEDIA THAT I CRY IT ONLY HAPPENED ONCE AT THE END OF VOLTRON BUT AHHHHHHHH

W A I T

HE'S GONNA BE BROUGHT BACK?????

HOLD UP THEY'RE JUST GONNA BRING ALL THOSE DEAD PEOPLE BACK??????

WAIT IS HE

BLINKY CALLED HIM A SON

HOLD ON IS THIS GOING TO BE A CLIFFHANGER???????????

BRUH THEY REALLY JUST CAN'T END THE SERIES WITHOUT CLIFFHANGERS like there's always an open ending

TROLLHUNTER TOBY????? You know what forget the whole rants I had on how toby was written they just redeemed it all

And that's all! I'd rate it a 6.5/10 because it's definitely the weakest of all the sequels but still had amazing animation and some good plot points. It's just really hard to look over the bad stuff enough to rate it any higher.

[soramei]

Intentional - Part 1

Pairing: Bang Chan x Reader (she/her)

Summary: Landing your first real job at JYPE was something short of a miracle. You were prepared to face the new struggles of this elusive career whilst moving to a new country, however, nothing could have prepared you for him. Will stolen glances, secret touches, and hushed nights spent in the recording room ever be enough for the both of you?

Genre: idol!bang chan au, forbidden relationship, coworkers to eventual lovers, slow burn 

Warnings: none right now, eventual smut,

Word Count: 7.3k 

Masterlist

A/N: hey yall this is my first ff im posting on tumblr :D im kinda scared to post but i hope anybody who stumbles on lil ol’ me will join me along the way :) also important!!! i made oc/reader asian cus i am lol (and this whole thing is basically a glorified self insert) so plz keep this in mind when reading!! oh god i didnt realize how slow this first part was sry... 

The cold silence of the room felt like stabs at your inside. You commanded your feet to stop bouncing up and down as you unconsciously started to bite off the dead skin of your bottom lip. The white corporate light from above reflected off your brand new lanyard hanging delicately from your neck. You felt the coarse blue fabric rub against your neck as you mindlessly fiddled with your lanyard; the newly printed photo of your face stared back at you with a smile. 

The creak of the door to your left was what broke you from your nervous fidgets. Whipping your head up from your lanyard, you immediately stood up ready to bow to whoever came through that door. 

It was a girl. She looked around the same age as you, if not older. Her attire was what gave her away. Her appearance essentially mirrored yours: hair tied back into a ponytail with a white blouse and black work pants. She also had the familiar blue ‘JYPE’ labeled strap hanging from her neck. 

“Hello,” you spoke meekly, scared to disturb the cold silence that had a hold on the room you were in. 

“Hello,” she replied. “My name is Choi Na-eun, I’m the new social media strategist intern and today is my first day.”

This is so relieving, you thought, another newbie to share the stress with me. 

“This is my first day too,” you perked up, “I’ll be starting as the new junior Chinese marketing assistant.” 

Getting the acceptance email from JYP Entertainment was definitely a high point in your life. The feeling of butterflies swarming your insides as you clicked the email open only to see your acceptance was immediately locked as a core memory. All the years of memorizing thousands of Korean and English vocabulary flashcards, the panic attacks before your finance exams, and the many, many late night coffee breaks were worth it the moment you received your first legitimate job offer, and from the esteemed JYP Entertainment company no less. 

“Chinese marketing?” Na-eun asked. “So you aren’t from here, I take it.” 

You shook your head. “I am from China. I completed my degree a while ago with a major in Language and a minor in Business. To be honest, I’ve done internships back home, but it’s been my dream to move to a new country.”

All of what you said was true. Up until now, your surroundings have never changed in all of your twenty-three years living. From the walk with your grandmother to daycare to the vast campus of your university, the view of your city has never changed. Your social circle stayed stagnant since you were able to talk and your love life was — for a lack of a better word — uneventful. 

It wasn’t until the day you decided to start applying for careers outside your home country that you felt hopeful. Hopeful that you could find an escape from your inert lifestyle and escape the burnout and stress that has been building up over the years. And so, on a day when you were feeling unusually confident, you gathered up the courage and spent hours sending out applications to organizations all over Asia that pertained to your specific degree. The applications were mainly for small jobs at small companies, however, your strange spike of motivation gave you the confidence to apply to the everso esteemed JYP Entertainment located in Korea. Of course you knew about this company — you and your friends played songs by ‘Twice’ nonstop back in highschool — but you didn’t realize the full power that this company had on the entertainment market until you did your full research. To say that you thought you had no chance was an understatement. This application was so far of a reach that you purposefully forced your mind to erase all memory of even applying. 

However, with your education, your work experience, and whatever tiny bit of luck you had, you somehow made it through the initial application process. Then the next. And the next. Then the interview. And now, you were nervously sitting in this white painted room with Na-eun, in a completely new country, waiting for your manager to come greet you. 

“So you’re from China? You’ve got to teach me chinese sometime.” Na-eun smiled. 

You giggled in return while nodding your head. You were relieved that you’ve met a potential friend so early in your career in this company. This was one of your big worries. With your social circle being so stagnant for the majority of your life back in China, you rarely had the opportunity to meet new people, much less make new friends. 

You were about to inquire more into Na-eun’s life when the door to your left abruptly opened. In the blink of an eye, three new people strutted in — two women and one man. They seemed to be higher status than you and Na-eun judging by their attire. All three were styled in some type of blazer and dress pants and there was no lanyard to be found on any of them. 

“Hello new employees,” the man greeted. Judging by his face, he looked to be in his late thirties at the least. His hair was styled back neatly and his lips slanted up, giving him a fox-like appearance. “I am Executive Manager Kim. Joined beside me on the left is Social Media Manager An and to my right is Marketing Manager Chen.” 

Both you and Na-eun immediately stood up to bow and introduce yourselves. 

“Hello. My name is Choi Na-eun, I’m the new social media strategist intern.” Na-eun said. 

“Hello. My name is y/n, I’m the new junior Chinese marketing assistant.” You repeated after her, copying exactly what she said. You did not want to screw anything up on your first day, especially your first impression. 

Manager Kim reached over to Na-eun, introducing himself and giving her a firm handshake. He then slowly moved over to you, and reached for your hand. 

“Y/n,” he gave time for your name to settle on his tongue as he gave a sly smile. “You’re not from here, aren't you?”

You shook your head ‘no’. “No, sir. I’m from China where I studied language and business. I hope to do well here as the Chinese marketing assistant.” You replied, mentally cursing yourself for sounding so timid. 

“I’m glad to hear,” Manager Kim chuckled, “I’m sure you’ll treat me and your other managers well.”

You felt an uncomfortable shiver pass through you as he brushed his thumb along your hand before letting go. This feeling was excused as nervousness, after all, this was your first day and your first time meeting your higher-ups. 

You introduced yourself to Manager Chen, assuming that she would be the one you were to assist in your time here at JYPE. Judging by her last name, you presumed that she was Chinese as well. 

“Forgive me for being so straight up Manager Chen, but are you Chinese?” You asked. 

“That is alright, y/n,” she smiled, “I’m not. My Husband is, but I’ve lived in China for more than half my life. I don’t want to brag, but my mandarin has gotten proficient over the past decade or so.”

Proficient? It’s amazing. You thought. This first day was turning out better than you thought. Other than the weird feeling you received from Manager Kim, everything was turning out splendid. A potential friend and a manager that could speak your first language.

“Since it’s about noon right now,” Manager Kim took a look at his watch, “What do you all think about some lunch?” 

The other managers nod their heads in agreement and gestures for you and Na-eun to follow them out of the waiting room you were in for so long. 

The whole building seemed so clean. With every corner lit, by natural light or artificial light, you could clearly see that every room, every piece of furniture and decor had been purposefully placed. You couldn’t help but have a stupid look of awe plastered on your face as you mindlessly follow your superiors over to the cafeteria.  

You turned your head over to Na-eun and gave her a tilt of the eyebrow, silently saying wow, this is where we work. 

With the turn of a corner and several silent strides, your little group made it to the cafeteria. 

The difference between your claustrophobic waiting room and this vast room was astonishing. With countless tables and romantic yellow lighting, this place almost resembled a five star restaurant. You’ve never seen a cafeteria as extravagant and clean as this before. However, to be fair, you’ve never had the experience of working with such a large corporation before. 

The managers led you to the serving station where you grabbed yourself a tray and proceeded to spoon small portions of rice and side dishes onto your plate. This cuisine was different to what you were used to, but nonetheless looked delicious. You were prepared for the small cultural differences, especially with the food, but from everything you’ve witnessed so far, the culture shock would be easier to overcome than what you’ve anticipated. 

“Have this soup y/n,” Manager Kim’s grating voice came from in front of you, interrupting your inner monologue. “It’s good for your complexion.” 

As Manager Kim hands over the bowl of soup, you feel the sleeve of his blazer brush up against your shoulder, causing the pit of your stomach to drop.

First day nerves. That was what this feeling was. You thought. 

You quietly thanked him with a small nod and walked briskly from the service line, trying to find where Na-eun went with the other two managers. Thankfully, they were just a step away and you quickly made your way over to the comfortable spot beside Na-eun. She gave you a small grin and you both followed your way to a table right in the middle of the room. 

Soon, all five chairs of the table got filled and sounds of chopsticks tapping and scraping against plates and bowls filled your ears. An awkward silence dominates your table as you start to pick at your food. 

“So,” Manager Chen cleared her throat, “after lunch I was thinking we should go to a meeting room and discuss Miss. Y/n’s role in our new project.”

“I was thinking the same for our new Intern Choi.” Manager An cut in, “What do you think, Manager Kim?” 

“It all sounds good. I will be accompanying Manager Chen to her meeting room as I wish to also further discuss the preliminary steps for our project.” Manager Kim looked from Manager Chen over to you. 

“Project?” You ask. 

“We’ve had a very successful year with our idol groups and we wanted to ride this success and start marketing in China. Recently, we’ve noticed a very large and growing Chinese audience for this group. I’m sure you’re very curious now, however we can discuss further details once we are in the meeting room.” Manager Chen replies while taking a sip of the water in her glass. 

Manager Chen appeared to be a very professional and respectable woman. With prominent collarbones and wide shoulders, she easily looked the part of a confident and adored manager. She needed minimal makeup to highlight her tall cheekbones, and even with a short heel on her feet she seemed to tower over you. However, her warm and comforting voice was what broke her intimidating demeanour. Just listening to her voice felt like you were back in your high school classroom with your favourite teacher explaining the motif of a sad love poem. 

After some more awkward conversations mixed with a few work discussions, the five of you finished the delicious food on your trays. 

“Please excuse me whilst I head to the restroom” Na-eun spoke up after your group finished clearing the table. 

“Please excuse me as well.” You quickly followed, bowing as you both ventured off to the washrooms. 

I should get her number so I’m not completely a loner in this place, you thought to yourself. And so, after a quick inner struggle to speak up, you finally decided to ask. 

“Hey, should we exchange contacts? I don’t wanna look like the newbie eating in the cafeteria alone after today.” You chuckled. 

“Totally!” Na-eun beamed. “I was actually thinking the same thing…” 

And so, you both quickly exchanged each other's contact as you made your way to the restrooms. 

The hall of the washrooms were narrow, hidden away from the main cafeteria. You walked in, deciding you only wanted to retouch your hair and makeup before your first official meeting. You carefully fix the loose hairs that somehow escaped the confines of your elastic and dab on a fresh layer of foundation before applying your lipstick which rubbed off while eating. Looking over at Na-eun, you see she’s quite in the zone redoing her mascara. 

“Hey, I’ll just wait for you in the hall.” You said. 

Na-eun gave you a disinterested nod back as she kept focusing on her mascara. 

You walked to the end of the hall, leaned against the wall, and pulled out your phone. Smiling, you opened the virtual Tamagotchi app and saw your little friend staring back at you, bouncing up and down. The bundle of virtual pixels happily bounced as you fed and bathed it, making you happier in return. Playing this game, you were so entranced with your phone that the abrupt closing of the washroom doors broke you out of your hypnosis fast, causing you to flinch and drop your phone. 

You looked up, only to see a brown haired man wearing a long sleeved black shirt. The hem of his sleeve fell, covering his hand as he bent down to pick up your phone. He stood back up, fully facing you now and you immediately recognized who he was. You weren’t a fool, of course you did all your research on the artists of JYPE before applying for the job. Looking down at you right now, holding your phone in his hand, was Bang Chan of Stray Kids. 

The wispy tufts of his brown hair bounced over his forehead as he stepped over to you. He smiled, his dimple poking out of his cheek, and handed your phone back to you. “I think you dropped this.”  

Blushing tomato red, you embarrassingly accepted the phone, trying not to make your shaking hands noticeable. It seemed like that failed, however, as you noticed him glance at your hands and dimple grow deeper. 

“Thank you.” You meekly chirped and lowered your head, still in awe that you somehow bumped into a JYPE idol in the bathroom hallway of a cafeteria. 

“It’s good that there’s no cracks.” Bang Chan said, looking in your eyes. 

You looked back into his eyes. His smile never left his face, and you physically felt the warmth radiating off his body like rays from the sun. Some boring, objective part of your brain knew this interaction only lasted a fraction of a second, but you swore that time froze.

“Hyung!” A distant voice called. 

Your trance was broken as Bang Chan looked over to the person calling his name. He turned back to you, politely bowed, and casually sauntered over to the man who called him. 

What just happened? Your inner monologue ran, still trying to process the embarrassing interaction. The scent of his cologne lingered, swirling the atmosphere around your body. 

Thankfully, you didn’t have too much time to dwell on this interaction as Na-eun finally opened the washroom doors and was making her way toward you. 

You and Na-eun trailed behind the managers until you reached the set of elevators. It was there where you had to unfortunately separate from your comfort work buddy as she hopped in the elevator across from yours with Manager An. The other two managers led you to the elevator at the end and pressed the button for your destination floor. The ride in the elevator was silent. You stood there, fiddling with your nails. 

Once the elevator gave the ding of arrival, the three of you headed down a hall where you presumed had the meeting room. 

Manager Kim took a look at the watch on his wrist. “We are a minute late, everybody should be there already. Enter silently and respectfully.” He said in a stern voice.

You reached the frosted glass door of the meeting room and entered through the already opened door. The managers followed behind you with Manager Chen being the last one in and closing the door. 

Your eyes widened at whom you saw.

There was Bang Chan, who sat in all his glory, staring right into your eyes with his mouth ajar. His shocked expression didn't last long, however, as he quickly composed himself to fit with the professional atmosphere of this room. 

But why was he here? You thought. He’s an artist, isn’t this a management meeting? 

Your inner monologue was broken by Manager Kim’s stern voice. “Y/n, why don’t you sit with me for today?” He asked with a slight tilt of the lips. His hand was hovering above your back, almost guiding you to the seat just right of the head chair. 

Your heart rate quickened. There was no way that you could handle sitting right beside a high position manager on your first day. You barely knew what your duties entailed, you definitely could not handle the pressure of this seat today. You whipped your head around to look for Manager Chen. She was already sitting in her seat, looking like she was right at home. 

“Manager Kim, if you don’t mind, I would like to sit in this position for today, '' a voice spoke up, “I have a lot of new ideas I’d like to share that are written in my notes.” 

Bang Chan.

He paused a brief second, eyes switching between you and Manager Kim, and raised his iPad to show the screen filled with words. 

“I don’t mind at all, go ahead.” Manager Kim monotonously replied. He then made his way to the head chair. 

You looked over at Bang Chan, trying to subtly send the most grateful facial expression over to him. He returned your look, slightly grinning as his fingers tapped on the screen of his iPad and sat down to the right of Manager Kim. You looked over to see Manager Chen gesturing you to sit in the chair beside her and swiftly made your way over. At your seat, she handed you a notepad and pen, both adorned with the JYPE logo. 

“Now, as of 1:02 p.m., September first, the meeting will officially begin.” Manager Kim clasped his hands together on top of the table. “As most of you already know, we are in the preliminary stages of planning a Chinese debut for our artist group ‘Stray Kids’. All we have right now is the estimated timeline, which is four months. We have a basic grasp of the concept we are working towards, however, as you all know, trends are always changing and growing. While we are working to create a new and original concept for Stray Kids, we also want the concept to gather as much audience reception as possible.” 

Wow. That was a lot to take in. Your hands struggled to keep up with writing down what Manager Kim was saying. You knew this relatively new group was really starting to explode in the past year, but a debut in another country? This group must work really hard to even have the company consider a step as risky as this. So this is why Bang Chan is also involved in this meeting. 

You peaked your head up from your notepad. Bang Chan sat across from you, one hand on his chin and the other one holding the pen to his tablet. 

Manager Kim then carefully discussed the duties that each group in the room would take. Many of the jobs were directly involved with developing the concept itself, such as producing music, concept art, and theme development. Your pen never took a break from gliding on the notepad as you hurriedly jotted down everything that Manager Kim said. 

Eventually, Manager Kim’s delegations moved to Manager Chen. “Manager Chen, I’ll let you take over from here.” 

“Thank you Manager Kim,” Manager Chen cleared her throat. “While my main job here was to market Korean comebacks towards the Chinese audience, this new project changes things up a bit. Now, not only will I be in charge of marketing to the Chinese audience, but I will also be directly in charge of the concept itself. I will be working carefully with our team in China to monitor the trends which we can incorporate into our debut.

“This is my new assistant, y/n,” She turned and gestured to you. You politely nodded your head. “She will be gathering information on useful trends and reporting back to me, as well as some translating. Please report any ideas that you deem useful to her by the end of every week for her to sort through and deliver to me.” 

You almost want to call Manager Chen crazy for giving you so much power, after all, you were only starting out as her assistant. Despite this, however, you were determined to go above and beyond with the new responsibilities given to you, after all, you knew that choosing to work in an organization as big as JYPE would take blood, sweat, and tears. 

After some clarifications given by Manager Chen and a few more questions directed at her, Manager Kim took the reins back in his hands. 

“Now, as I’m sure you all know, this is Bang Chan: the leader of Stray Kids. Although our management team is in charge of this debut, we like to include the opinions of artists whenever possible. He will make an appearance whenever he can and act as a representative of Stray Kids, sharing their ideas and opinions.” Manager Kim explained. 

Bang Chan politely introduced himself, and quickly went on to express some concerns of his members. He made sure that each concern was answered thoroughly by Manager Kim before moving on to the next. 

“As for our concept ideas,” Bang Chan’s soft brown eyes met yours, “will I have to report to y/n?” 

You felt your ears redden. 

“You could, yes,” Manager Kim straightened his back, “but if you find the weekly deadlines too much of a problem, you may just report to me or at any subsequent meeting.” 

“No worries sir,” Bang Chan’s eyes lingered on yours for a fraction of a second more before grinning at Manager Kim, “I’m always punctual.”  

The rest of the meeting consisted of more introductions and preliminary plans. After about an hour, everybody seemed satisfied with the contents of the meeting and were starting to pack up all their clutter on the table. You looked over at Manager Chen, silently asking what should I do next? 

Manager Chen smiled. “Let's head to my floor. I can give you a quick tour, you can get settled at your desk. I have some paperwork that I’m almost done with; I’m sure you’ll have no problem finishing it for me.” She already was standing up and straightening over the creases of her jacket. 

You stood up as well and followed behind Manager Chen like a lost baby duckling. You both made your way over to Manager Kim to bid farewell. You politely thanked him, said your goodbyes, and were about to leave when he stopped the two of you. 

“Manager Chen, let’s go out for drinks tonight.” Manager Kim took a look at the intricate watch on his wrist. “With our whole team, of course. It’ll be a welcoming night and we can get to know the people on our team better.” 

“That’s a great idea, Manager Kim,” Manager Chen nodded at his idea in approval. She turned on her iPad to quickly get a glimpse at her schedule. “What do you think y/n? Can you make it tonight? I know this is very last moment, but I think it’ll be a great opportunity for you to get to know your coworkers better.” 

“I should be able to make it.” You definitely could make it. You had no plans anyways. 

“Am I invited to this top secret party you’re all having?” A now very distinguishable voice came from behind you. Bang Chan stared at Manager Kim with a very mischievous expression. 

“Would your manager allow it?” Manager Kim questioned, knitting his eyebrows. 

“I’m on a diet, so I can’t drink alcohol or eat anything,” Bang Chan’s nose scrunched up in annoyance, “but I want to be as involved as I can. Just because I’m an idol doesn’t mean I can’t help behind the scenes as well.”

“Very well,” Manager Kim nodded with a fixed expression, “Let’s all meet at that restaurant about a block away west. I’ll go tell the others.” And with that, Manager Kim left you, Manager Chen, and Bang Chan to stand in awkward silence. 

“Well,” Bang Chan cleared his throat and clapped his hands together, “I’ll get going as well to do some work now, but it was nice meeting the both of you.” 

“You as well.” Manager Chen replied for the both of you and Bang Chan left soon after. 

Manager Chen then led you to the elevators again and you headed up yet another few floors to reach your destination. You nervously fiddled with your hair as you silently waited behind your boss, looking up at the smooth lines of her blazer every few seconds. The elevator doors dinged, letting you know of its arrival. The two of you swiftly headed out the elevators and walked to what you presumed was Manager Chen’s office area. You kept following behind Manager Chen in silence before you stopped in front of a set of doors that looked identical to the ones at the previous meeting room. Manager Chen opened the doors for you, and you headed in. 

You paused a step in, looking wide-eyed at the interior. The office was clean. A big glass desk sat right in the middle of the vast room in front of a huge set of windows. There were a couple of soft looking chairs placed right before the desk with a huge rug right underneath it. Over to your left, you spotted a water dispenser with a kettle right beside it. You stared at the room a bit longer before realizing you must have looked very stupid with that astonished look on your face. 

“Is this your office, Manager Chen?” You asked. 

“Yes. It seems that you like it,” She chuckled. You felt the heat rise to your ears. 

“Since you’ll be working so close to me, I’m sure you’ll be happy to come here more often.” 

“Thanks.” You awkwardly laughed. You blamed your bad response on the fact that you still weren’t familiar with the language, not your blatant awkwardness. 

Manager Chen made her way over to her desk, picking up a small stack of papers. “These are some letters I’ve received from several designer companies in China. Since we are still in the very preliminary stages of this project, we would like to keep our options open for the stylists here.” She picks an annotated letter from the pile. “I’ve translated and created a summary of the main points of this letter. There are a few more left which I believe I can trust you with. Just do as I did with this letter and add the sample pictures along with it.”

You quickly complied, taking the stack of papers from her hands. 

“I’ll show you to your new work space.” She led you out of your office and over to a cubicle that wasn’t too far away. It was considerably smaller compared to Manager Chen’s office, but you thought it had a certain coziness to it. Plus, working close to your coworkers could also boost your motivation. “Here is your desk, it’s not the most exciting thing, but you may bring photos or whatnot to decorate it. Now, I’ll let you settle in and get started on your work. You can meet me at my office around six, I can double check your work before we leave.” 

You thanked her before she left and immediately got started on your work. You diligently translated the whole of the letters before picking out the main points that matched with Manager Chen’s example. After this was done, you included the photos that came with each letter and slipped them into their own cozy folder. This work was monotonous, sure, but it was something you needed on your hectic first day here. 

You were so captivated by your work that you completely forgot about the time. The sun was starting to set, and you only remembered to look at the time after you tucked your last letter neatly in its folder. You briefly panicked, praying that you weren’t making your manager wait. Thankfully, it was only a quarter until six. You took the next fifteen minutes double checking your work, making sure to also check the time every once in a while. At exactly six, you left your desk and scurried over to the big doors of Manager Chen’s office. 

Knocking a couple times, you waited patiently to be let in. 

“Come in.” 

You let yourself in, handing the papers to your manager, then sat quietly in one of the chairs before her desk, crossing your fingers together. You fiddled with your thumbs, patiently waiting for Manager Chen to speak up. 

“Not bad, this is some decent work.” Manager Chen announced as soon as she finished glossing over your work. “I’ve noted some places that you can either fix or improve. I’ll scan them and hand you a copy tomorrow.” 

You let out a breath that you didn’t know you were holding. A tidal wave of relief washed over you as you let yourself relax further into your chain. Not bad, this is some decent work. You proudly repeated this moment in your brain. Although you were disappointed with the mistakes that you let slip through, to get somewhat of a compliment on your first day meant a lot to you. 

“Shall we get going now?” Manager Chen asked. 

You grabbed your bag and stood up. “I’ll let you lead the way.” 

                                                         _______

It seemed like all you were doing on your first day was following Manager Chen around like a lost puppy. The situation right now was no exception either, as you tried to copy her confident strides over to the restaurant a block down. You watched the busy rush hour streets and sidewalks fill with people, some people going home after a long day, some people going to party just like you.

Soon, after a few more minutes of walking, the both of you arrived at the small wooden doors of the restaurants. It seemed like the both of you were a bit late as Manager Kim was already waiting in front of the entrance with the rest of the team. Bang Chan was also there, head down looking at his phone. 

“Sorry we’re late, have you been waiting for long?” Manager Chen somehow sounded confident despite making everybody wait on her.

Her voice seemed to have caught everybody’s attention. You watched as Bang Chan swiftly turned his head up from his phone, his eyes making contact with yours. You immediately focused your eyes somewhere else, trying to casually play off the fact that your eyes subconsciously drifted to him. 

“We’ve only been waiting for a couple minutes.” Manager Kim gave a tight smile. “Let’s go in before you all get too cold.” 

Your little group of around ten people slowly entered the doors, filling the restaurant. Manager Kim called over a waitress, signaling that you had ten people in your group, and let the waitress lead you all to a long wooden table. 

The restaurant was nice, nothing too fancy, but that’s how you could tell the food was good. With dim lighting and tightly packed tables, it made you feel fuzzy and warm on the inside. 

However, your thoughts on the restaurant were soon broken by a hand on your shoulder. 

“Y/n, why don’t you sit with me?” Manager Kim’s lips curled up, “After all, this is a work gathering, how good of a boss would I be if I didn’t even treat my newest team member to a drink?” 

Your brain was in shambles. You seriously didn’t feel comfortable sitting with him all night. However, the logical side of your brain was saying something different. He’s just being nice as a boss. You don’t know how people in this country act anyways, stop being paranoid. 

It seemed like your inner turmoil was taking longer than necessary, as you heard another familiar voice speak up. 

“Manager Kim-” Bang Chan called out. 

“You don’t need to sit with me here, Bang Chan.” Manager Kim chuckled as he stared directly in Bang Chan’s eyes. “I’d rather not talk about work outside the office.”

You watched as Bang Chan’s eyebrows furrowed, looking back to you in reluctance. You smiled at him before turning your attention to Manager Kim. It was just one night, right? Plus, there’s no harm in establishing a good impression with your boss. 

“I’ll sit with you, Manager Kim.” You smiled, “thanks for offering.”

And so, you took your seat next to Manager Kim at the table. Bang Chan, who was to your left, looked askance at Manager Kim for a brief second before his facial expression did a complete 180. His familiar, boy-ish smile was plastered on his face like it was the most natural thing. 

When the menus came, everybody at the table — including you — started to order onslaughts of food and alcohol. After brief moments of casual chatter about topics such as the weather or how good the food was here, everything that was ordered arrived at your table.

You grabbed a can of beer and started sipping on it. You’ve drank before — of course — with your old friends at university, but it’s been at least a year since you last did. Better ease myself in. You thought. 

However, your preconceived plans were ruined when a small glass of clear liquor got pushed in front of you. 

“Y/n, surely you aren’t going to sip on that can all night.” The ends of Manager Kim’s lips curled up. 

“Wasn’t planning to, sir.” You replied while tipping the glass up and into your mouth. The bitter liquid burned your throat as it went down. You took a moment to recollect your surroundings. Seems like your tolerance was higher than you thought. 

“Bang Chan, do you not drink? Why not eat something then?” Manager Chen pointed to the food on the table. 

“No can do ma’am, I’m on a strict diet. My manager would kill me.” Bang Chan pointed to his glass of water. 

“In that case,” Manager Chen filled another glass, “Y/n, have another drink.” She slid the glass down the table in front of you. 

You gladly accepted your second drink, downing the alcohol in one go. Your eyes instinctively squeezed together as you felt your throat burn. From the tips of your ears to the ends of your toes, your whole body felt warm and alive. 

You lost track of the time. As your conversations got livelier, your head got fuzzier. You stopped counting your drinks after four, especially since so many people were eager to offer the new employee a drink. Although your vision was starting to blur, you could still think straight. I can still think, you thought to yourself, still — what a powerful buzz.

Your thoughts ran rampant in your mind as you stared at the lightbulb across the room. What a pretty light. So bright. Warm. 

“Y/n.”

Was the light calling your name? 

“Y/n!” 

Your eyes focused again and snapped away from the lightbulb. Where was the voice coming from? You slowly turned your head. Bang Chan.

“Hi.” You smiled. 

“Hi.” He smiled back. So bright. Warm. “It’s been hours and I haven’t even offered you a drink yet.” 

You tried to focus your eyes on his face as he slid the glass over to you. One more drink wouldn’t hurt your buzz, right?  

You gladly accepted, slowly moving your hand over to the glass to pick the clear liquid up. It went down in one go just like all the others. 

Huh? Was this water? 

You struggled to focus your eyes on the person who offered you the drink. “That was yummy.” 

“I bet it was,” the talking blur chuckled, “How about another one?”

You nodded, then took the glass he slid towards you. It’s funny how water flows even when in a cup. Water. You needed to pee. 

“Hey,” your words dragged out, “where’s uh, where’s the washroom?”

“Follow me. I’ll show you.” Manager Kim stood up and reached his hand out towards you. You didn’t want to take it, but it seemed like nobody was noticing his offer. 

Reluctantly, you took his hand and stood up, only to stumble down again. Did your knees not want to listen? 

“Whoa there, better hold on.” Manager Kim said. 

“No, I can walk. I-I can walk.” You let go of Manager Kim and tried to focus all your brainpower on moving your feet in a straight line. This tactic only worked for a second, however, as your knees gave in and you stumbled down. 

“It’s obvious that you can’t.” Manager Kim’s lips turned up. “It’s time for you to go home. I’ll take you back.” 

What? No. You didn’t want Manager Kim to take you home, not after all the awkward events of today and the general vibe from him. You tried to express your thoughts, but nothing came out of your mouth. 

“Manager Kim, you’ve been drinking!” Bang Chan’s voice came from some part of the room. “It’s not safe to drive, I’ll call a taxi for you.” 

“What about Y/n here? I’ll get a taxi for us both.” Manager Kim said. 

“I called my manager earlier to pick me up, we can drop her off along the way. It’s not a good idea to put two drunk people in a car. I’m completely sober right now, so let me do all the work.” Bang Chan grinned, patting Manager Kim on his shoulder. 

“Is that what you want, Y/n?” Manager Kim glared. 

You dizzily nodded. 

“Alright. In that case, I can call my own taxi later.” Manager Kim grimaced. 

“Stay safe, Manager Kim.” Bang Chan smiled. He turned to you. “My manager’s been waiting outside for a while now, do you want to leave now?” 

You nodded. You tried to start walking again, but your damn knees just wouldn’t listen. 

“Do you want to hold on to me?” Bang Chan knitted his brows together and held out an arm.

“I,” you slurred, “can walk.” You tried to start your feet again, only to end up stumbling down. 

“I know you can,” Bang Chan said as he reached his hands out to stabilize you, “but — ah —  I’m really tired after today. Can you hold on to my arm so I won’t fall out of exhaustion?” 

You agreed to help him. Bang Chan waved to everybody still at the table before leading the two of you out to a black SUV. He allowed you to stumble your way in the back seats first before sliding in himself. He asked you for your address, which took many tries for you to accurately type it into his phone. 

You leaned your head against the window, staring at passing blurred lights as Bang Chan’s manager started driving. Just being away from the loud and bright environment seemed to have cleared your head a little, but the pounding would not stop. You cursed yourself for being so irresponsible on your first day, especially because you were still alone in this new country.   

“Hey,” you felt a gentle tap on your shoulder, “want some water?” You looked over to see Bang Chan holding out a plastic bottle with the lid screwed off. 

You languidly reached your hand out for the bottle and gulped down as much water as you could in one breath before handing it back to him. The street lights started getting blurrier as you tried to fight exhaustion, the muscles in your eyelids starting to get more and more uncontrollable. 

“Y/n.” 

“Hmm?”

“Don’t fall asleep yet, we’re almost there. Ten more minutes.” 

You couldn’t hear anything after that, however, as you felt your eyes give up on you and your body fall into a deep sleep. 

“Y/n… Y/n.” A familiar voice called.

You fluttered your eyes open, your head pounding. Not knowing where you were, you surveyed your surroundings in a panic. It seemed as though you were in the back of a car… Parked outside of your apartment building? 

“Hey, you’re finally awake.” Bang Chan’s voice entered your ear. It all came rushing back to you; the restaurant, the drinking, entering the SUV. 

“How long have we been parked here?” Your groggy voice sounded inhuman. You had to clear your throat a couple times. 

“It’s only been twenty or so minutes. I’m not allowed to leave the car, are you able to get home alone? I can ask my manager to go with you.” Bang Chan scratched the back of his neck. 

“I should be fine.” You mumbled, a bit embarrassed to have fallen asleep in the car of a person you just met that day. This wasn’t even his car, it was his manager’s. 

“Hey… can I put my number in your phone?” Bang Chan avoided your eyes. “Just so you can tell me when you get home.” He quickly added. 

“Okay.” You awkwardly handed him your phone with your contacts already opened. He quickly typed his phone number in before handing it back to you. 

“Text me when you get home. Remember to lock your door, okay?” 

You thank both him and his manager before hurrying back to your apartment. Your head was still pounding unrelentlessly as you pressed the elevator button for your floor. The events of today were still unprocessed in your brain. You met a potential friend, which was a highlight. However, you also met two higher up managers and an actual idol, only to get hilariously drunk in the presence of. At least it’ll make a good story to tell my mom. You thought. 

In no time, you made it in your apartment and locked the door behind you, remembering what Bang Chan told you in the car. You texted the new number in your phone. 

Y/n: Hi. It’s y/n. I just entered my apartment.

Not even a minute later, your phone lit up, signaling a new text message. 

Bang Chan: great!! remember to lock the doooor hahaha ( ◕ω◕✿ )

You subconsciously grin at your phone. Cute. Throwing your phone haphazardly on your bed, you begrudgingly began your night routine. After washing up and throwing on a random shirt from your closet, you fell on your bed ready to sleep. You were about to close your eyes when your phone lit up again with a ding. It was another text.

Bang Chan: Hey… Just so you know, if you ever feel unsafe around the office just tell me okay? I’ll always try to help you in whatever way I can.

[writingwithcolor]

The White-Presenting Mixed Japanese Experience

@horse-faced-activist-gay​ said:

Hello! I have what I fear is probably a stupid question. I have a character whose great grandmother was Japanese. Everyone else in his family is white. Is he a poc? Not in a breaking him down to a percentage type of way, and there are other characters in the story who certainly are poc, and his mother was close to her grandmother's culture, he isn't so much. It just feels like I should know to capture him properly. Thank you!

Neither Japanese identity nor POC status can be assigned purely by blood quantums. There are a fair number of individuals in the US who identify as mixed/ Japanese/ Japanese-American who fit the above description. What is more relevant for the purposes of your story is how this character views their Japanese identity, how they interact with white culture in the US, and how both of these concepts affect their interactions with family and friends. Please research the concept of “white presenting” for further insight. 

- Marika.

While in some ways, sometimes, I am white presenting, I’ve been pretty connected to my culture since childhood, so I’m pretty solid on my own POC label. I’ve reached out to other white-presenting Japanese peers for their experiences! 

It’s a complicated relationship. My respondents were split on whether or not the POC label was right for them individually, although everyone identified as Japanese/Okinawan. The POC label is very much a matter of personal choice and how you want to be perceived. As Marika said, sometimes it’s less productive to talk about “who is POC” and more productive to consider how someone’s racial or ethnic identity changes how they interact with the world. 

One common thread was how quickly they were racialized or invalidated the moment they opened up about their heritage. 

A: [Regarding physical comments like “oh, I see it a bit now in your eyes”] I've always seen it as ego soothing, like “damn sorry I misread your ethnicity here's something.” In the Western mind Asian people have particular eyes. Either that or the way people look at me shifts when I mention my ethnicity.

B: I recently had an experience where a professor said I couldn't be a person of color because I was lighter than a paper bag and it caused a whole discussion that was frankly humiliating. I feel weird claiming the identity of POC because I can evade a lot of racism just based on looking white. I've noticed a lot of my experiences with racism are based on disclosure. I generally get treated as white until I mention being multiracial or Asian specifically, then people get weird.

Another common thread was feeling as though monoracial white people didn’t see the utility in identifying with the non-white culture at all, and pressured them to “embrace whiteness”: 

A: I never got put into the Other category by white people. To white people it's always been, “why are you so weird, just accept you're white and move on.” I'm stubborn so people pushing against me meant I pushed back harder. My identity as an Okinawan-American is much greater than my identity as a European-American these days.

C: [It] made me feel so off-put. “Embracing” my whiteness was all me, on my own terms, using my own realizations. I'm fairly fine to say that I feel like I was bullied out of saying I'm Japanese openly. 

They also noted that monoracial Asians also gate-kept them out of the community (an experience I share with A as well!). 

A: When I mention something about my ancestry [to someone in the Asian-American community] to connect as a fellow Asian-American, I always get like, "wow really? I couldn't tell, you must've taken more after your [white] Mom" or some shit. So it can be a sensitive topic for me. It does feel like the second I drop the fact that I'm Asian on another Asian person it's like a test, like they gotta measure my Asianess." 

On a more hopeful note, they mentioned that they’ve worked to find ways to connect with their heritage or find a supportive community, and that it’s been rewarding. 

A mentioned that the local Vietnamese-American community was welcoming, and also found that learning Japanese in university meant a lot for cultural connection. 

B found that taking Japanese classes, going to Japanese cultural events, and sharing Japanese food with friends helped them connect. 

C mentioned having a great time exploring traditional dress and kimono workshops, as well as buying old/vintage Japanese items to learn about them. 

All of them mentioned that online nikkei communities have also been a great space to connect with each other, although they said there was a certain je ne sais quoi about in-person interaction that they greatly missed. 

So, OP, I hope you can see from this that cultural connection and community are going to mean a lot to someone like your character, and you should represent that by giving him an interest in keeping up with his Japanese culture, even if it’s through the little things. 

Also from my wonderful respondents is this message to any white-presenting Japanese person struggling with their identity (and this can apply to other white-presenting mixed folks too!): 

C: I think you'll build some confidence as you get older and that confidence includes not just your personality, appearance, but who you are. I fought to get into those Asian student clubs (failed), went on dates with some Asian people (failed), tried to make friends with certain Asians on the basis we were both Asian (failed), went to Japan and tried to connect with people (failed). You shouldn't have to do all this to prove to others or yourself that you are who you are. All my Asian friends have entertained the "come over I want to make this recipe" or "let's go see this Japanese pottery shop." Find people who want to support you.

~Mod Rina White-presenting & mixed Japanese followers, please feel free to use this as a space to share your thoughts. Your experiences are very welcome here.