#there are so many directions i can take it.. i can take it in every direction.. i love being someone who partakes in art 🥲 music is the
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wtfaniii · 2 days ago
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Can you pleaseeee do a Namgyu x reader story where he’s your mean ex boyfriend that secretly still wants you 🙏
Of course! That man has something and you know it girl
From love to hate
Nam-Gyu (player 124) x reader // you
Fem reader!
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Summary: You were so miserable that out of 456 people in this game you met again with the man who made your love life miserable a year ago.
Warning: Some emotional abuse, unstable relationship on both sides.
Note: I understand you girl, that boy has something that makes him attractive, I hope this is to your liking and meets your expectations!
The second game was over, the girl just wanted to calm her nerves sitting silently on her bed but she was startled a little when Thanos appeared next to one leap.
—Get lost —she said, rolling her eyes and continuing to play with his fingers.
—How pretty —he said sarcastically.
—You were nicer before —Gyu said, coming to her left side.
She sighed and got out of bed ready to move out of there, she wanted to have zero contact with him after having found in bed with her best friend.
—Fuck you
—¿You kiss with that vocabulary? —Nam-gyu hurried to stop her from escaping and stood in front of her.
—¡Move! ¡I don't want anything to do with you!
Yes, the guy was an idiot, he acted like an idiot throughout their entire relationship and he would always be an idiot.
She thought could tolerate him, she loved him enough to do it but there was a limit she wasn't going to cross, infidelity was something she was never going to get over.
Nam-gyu wasn't going to give up now that he had her so close, she was the only one who loved him just the way he was and even though he had made a mistake by getting between the legs of her slut friend he still couldn't stop thinking about her.
He took her arm with a little more force than he should have, it was inevitable, he wanted to tell her to please stay but instead he said something more hurtful.
—Stop being such a bitch and listen to me.
In his mind he wanted to regret it but the laughter deep inside Thanos made his ego as a man grow.
That was one of his many problems, the influence that third parties managed to have on him.
However, he couldn't think of anything else when he felt the girl's hand crash into his cheek, both becoming the center of attention of the other players.
—If you call me a bitch again, I'll kick you where it hurts the most —she warned him, pointing a finger at him in a threatening manner, to which Nam-gyu raised his hands in a sign of peace while backing away.
—She's a real sweetheart —Thanos said for the second time, amused and sarcastic.
—You have no idea....
[...]
It was time for the third game, the girl managed to overcome each and every one until it was time to pair up and take a cubicle before the rest.
She was alone, she thought that this time it would be the end for her.
Meanwhile Nam-gyu and Thanos had already managed to get an empty cubicle but just before closing the door 124 stopped at the entrance and looked in all directions.
—¡¿What the hell are you doing?! ¡Come in already!
But he ignored it completely, the drug in his system raised his adrenaline and clouded his judgment but the only thing he was quite clear about was that he had to make sure his damn ex-girlfriend was still alive after this.
Seeing her disoriented in the crowd, he didn't think twice and ran towards her, hearing Thanos shouting at him but he kept his eyes on the girl.
As soon as he got close to her, he took her by the shoulders and led her to a cubicle where, after having beaten the players out, he managed to close the door with her.
She was just about to thank him when Nam-gyu waved his hand at her to shut up.
—Not a word —he said, taking deep breaths.
—I was going to tell you that you are an idiot.
He gave her an annoyed look, but she was actually grateful even though she wasn't going to say it out loud.
Despite hearing the screams and gunshots through the door, the tension between them was also palpable.
They had so many things to say to each other but it was neither the time nor the place, Nam-gyu only needed to be so close to death to know that among so much shit in his life she was the only one he needed.
Their relationship had been so close and strong that all it took to end it was a one-night stand with another woman, and now he regretted it.
—I was drugged when I slept with her —he said without turning to look at her and watching through the small crack in the door as the pink soldiers collected the corpses of the eliminated players.
—That doesn't make it better —she replied without much enthusiasm.
Just by hearing her voice he knew that she had not let go of the past either, he knew her well enough to realize that the feeling of wanting to return was mutual.
But neither of them took the step that was required.
Once the doors opened, they both silently left there, Nam-gyu was the first to go towards Thanos who looked at him with his eyes half closed.
[...]
During the voting, the players looked at each other with hatred and other mixed emotions, Nam-gyu's gaze remained on the girl who was on the side of those who had chosen the tag, it was curious how now he too was questioning whether he should choose the circle again or this time make the decision to end the games.
—¡Press the circle! —Thanos shouted euphorically, bringing him out of his thoughts.
Min-su was slightly startled by the sudden shout, "Pathetic" Nam-gyu thought but he also felt somewhat pressured to make a decision.
After Thanos went to vote, he approached the poor trembling boy and spoke into his ear.
—If you don't press the circle you will be left alone without anyone to defend you.
It seems that this was enough to keep the 125 votes in his favor, with that they would win and continue participating, but when it was his turn his hand deviated towards the huge check mark.
He clearly heard Thanos' frustrated groan.
He took the red badge that the guard gave him and stood next to those his companion so hated.
—I honestly thought you would vote to keep playing —the girl murmured, standing next to him —¿What made you change your mind?
—Shut the fuck up —he mumbled angrily.
She still smiled softly at him and took his hand, a simple but meaningful sign that she was still by him side. Just as she had promised him since they met
The votes ended in a tie and now Nam-gyu had to continue playing and tolerating the irritable Thanos, he did not consider him his friend but his partner, he only hoped that this decision making would not influence their bond of trust too much.
Unfortunately, that was not the case and the tension between both sides of players increased with every second in the men's room.
—I'm not mad at you —230 said, approaching him while splashing some cold water on his face —I would also bend over backwards for a hottie like her.
He wanted to avoid fights but 333 butted into his conversation.
—Stop bothering others, you must understand that not all of us want to die in here.
Thanos laughed amused. —Oh look! The two lovebirds want to get out of here just because their girlfriends asked them to!
—I think we've collected enough money —Nam-gyu interrupted with a stern expression and a defensive posture. —Friend, we can still get out of here.
Maybe if 230 hadn't been under the influence of drugs he would have listened to him and they would have had a formal conversation where everyone would have come out a winner.
But that wasn't the case, instead he blurted out the following words.
—¿Why don't I just let you two die in the next game? You two can relax, I'll take care of your girlfriends so they won't be alone, if you know what i mean...
He barely finished the sentence with an arrogant smile when 333 threw a punch that Thanos managed to dodge.
He was going to make fun of it if it hadn't been for Nam-gyu punching him in the face, leaving him stunned and unleashing a fight between the Circle team and the X team.
Nam-gyu may have been a jerk to her, but she was still his girl and even if he had to kill other contestants, he would make sure they both came out alive and with a good amount of money.
Yeah... he did love her.
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enthusiasticharry · 8 hours ago
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the one where YN gets a job as a bartender in a motorbike club's bar, and Harry runs the club.
author's note: suprise!! i'm back again!! i promised i wouldn't keep you waiting and i'm not. this is the first part in my biker!harry mini-series which i started a while ago and only just got around to finishing! let me know what you think and what you'd like to see in the next instalments!
word count: 11.6k of sexy biker!harry (that's it, that's all).
WARNINGS: strong language, smut, bike riding, a bar fight and talks of a motor accident.
let me know what you think of clover here!! mwah <3
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1979
“Look, sweets, I’d hire you on the spot if I thought it would be a good idea,” Mick spoke from across the bar, towel over one shoulder and another in his hand drying a glass, “But it just isn’t, I’m sorry.”
YN sighed, dropping her hands down on the bar. This was the fourth one she’d tried, and so far, she hadn’t had any luck. She wasn’t asking for much – just a job to help pay for her student loans. She had graduated a year ago and bounced from job to job, and yet none of them seemed to fit. It wasn’t necessarily her dream to work in a bar, but she hadn’t a single clue about what her dream was. She had a first-class honours history degree (which she adored getting) and yet not a single idea of what to do with it.
She couldn’t think of the future at this moment, she needed to think about the now and if she wanted to continue to live in her small apartment and eat — she needed a job.
Clovers had been her last hope. It was the last bar in town that YN was yet to try, and despite its less-than-positive reputation – it was always busy, and that meant money coming in. As she turned to look around the bar, which was already quite crowded for it being early on a Friday night, she couldn’t help but imagine the cash that was funnelling through the establishment, and how she wished she could get at least some of it.
“Can I get you a drink, sweets?” Mick spoke again, offering her a soft smile, “It’ll hopefully soften the blow a little bit.”
YN smiled at the man and nodded, “Thank you. Whisky, please.”
Mick got straight to work, placing the glass in front of her, dropping an ice cube into the glass and pouring her a more than generous shot. Just as she fumbled with her purse to pull out some bills to pass to Mick, he shook his head and held his hand out to stop it. She smiled in thanks and watched as he turned and walked away, going to serve the next customer who was standing a few feet away from her.
YN picked up her drink, and just as she was about to take a drink the door beside her opened. Her lips parted, her eyes watching as a group of what seemed to be fifteen or so men, all clad in heavy leather or dark denim walked into the bar.
Of course, YN knew about them. Anyone who lived here knew who they were, but it was the first time that she had seen them this up close. The most she had ever experienced with them was the low rumbling of their engines from a distance, or possibly them riding past her but that was only ever one or two. It was their jackets that often set them apart from the rest of the riders in the town, the very specific Clover’s Riders jacket that every member adorned and what seemed like all times.
The men were loud as they stepped in, most of them heading towards the bar whilst others went to some of the other members who were already seated in the bar. YN’s eyes never left the door until the last one had made his entrance, and she just couldn’t seem to draw them away.
He was younger than many of his counterparts, probably resting at an age near YN’s or possibly a few years or so older. He was clad in the same heavy denim that many of the others wore, but they seemed to sit on his body much easier. The curls of his hair were tousled in every direction it seemed, but YN found herself wondering as to what it would feel like to run her fingers through it.
With a shake of her head, she turned back to her glass and lifted it to her lips. She took a large gulp of the liquid, allowing that to slip down her throat before she finished the rest of it. Mick was long gone from being anywhere near her, working at what seemed like double speed to keep up with the orders that the gang of men were giving him, and she felt as though that was probably her cue to leave. She would have to brainstorm other options for work, seeing as though this just hadn’t called through.
Sighing, YN pulled the strap of her bag over her shoulder and pushed up from the stool she was resting on. Just as she turned around to make a beeline for the door through the bodies that were crowding the room, she was stopped by a body in front of hers.
“Woah, woah, little darling where do you think you’re going?” It was one of the riders, standing in front of her with a grin on his features.
“Home,” she said with a shrug.
“So soon,” The man looked over his shoulder to some of his friends who were standing close by, “Me and my buddies here didn’t even get to say hello.”
“Right, okay, hello,” YN nodded to the man in front of her and those behind him, “Really have to get going.”
The man extended his arms so that she couldn’t carry move from her space in front of him, “Let us buy you a drink little darling, I promise you’ll enjoy it.”
“I’ve already had one, thank you, and it was very enjoyable,” YN offered them another small smile, “Now please move out of my way so that I can go home.”
“Hey, none of that,” The man shook his head, “Stay with us, I promise we’ll make it worth it.”
YN hummed, tilting her head from side to side lightly, “I’ll pass but I’m sure you’ll have no trouble finding someone else to make the night worth it.”
And with that, YN pushed past the man and beelined for the door. She half expected him to grab her, but from the hoots and hollers of his friends, he was too embarrassed to do anything else.
The bar that YN had worked out whilst she was completing her degree had taught her a thing or two about how to deal with rowdy men, and whilst the firm but clear approach worked in most cases, YN wasn’t afraid to resort to other means if necessary. It was all a respect thing, and more often than not if you deal back to them what they deal to you – the situation usually sorts itself.
YN had just rested her palm against the wood of the door when she heard someone call her name. She saw Mick standing there, leaning over the bar to catch her attention.
“Saw you deal with those guys,” He nodded his head over to the men whose attention had been taken by another woman in the bar, who seemed to accept their advances more than YN did, “When can you start?”
YN’s face broke out into a smile and took a delighted step towards Mick, “Whenever.”
“Right now?” He raised his eyebrows at her, motioning to the men who were calling his name for more drinks, “Have a feeling we’re going to be swamped tonight.”
YN nodded and immediately dropped her purse down behind the bar and rolled the sleeves of her cardigan up.
She turned to the men who were now staring at her with their mouths slightly agape, “What can I get you?”
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It was a Thursday night and YN had been working at Clover’s for around a week at this point when Mick decided that she could handle a night on her own. After being thrown into what very much was the deep end on her first shift, there had been time the next day for Mick to show her the ropes properly and anything she would specifically need to know.
Mick said that he normally wouldn’t leave such a new person on their own so quickly, but he had an important family issue that he couldn’t get out of and that she had shown enough trust that he wasn’t worried. It was a Thursday, so it wasn’t going to be too busy but even so, those who were going to be there would be Riders, and they would protect their bar from anything.
It was nearing nine, and YN would probably say that they were at a quarter of their capacity, the majority of them being riders who had been there for the last few hours or so. YN was lucky she supposed. They never ordered anything more complicated than a beer, at most a whisky or a bourbon and this was their bar so there were never any arguments about paying for the drinks.
There was a lull in the orders, so YN decided to take it upon herself to dry some of the glasses she had washed in the previous lull. This job was not for the weak she would say that, but YN would be lying if she said she didn’t enjoy it. She loved people watching and mixed with the hum of the jukebox it was the perfect combination for her.
The door to the bar opened again about twenty minutes, and in walked that same man that caught her attention a week or so ago, on that first day she was here. He looked the same, apart from he was clad in a mixture of denim and leather this time instead of just denim, and a large bruise was sprouting from under his left eye. To YN, it was obvious that the cause was a punch, for there was nothing else that could cause a bruise such as that one. He walked into the room, ignored the hoots and hollers from some of the other men and took a seat right in the middle of the bar.
YN threw the towel she was holding over her shoulder and walked towards him, resting her hands on the edge of the bar, “What can I get ya?”
The man didn’t stray his eyes away from where they were planted firmly on the wood of the bar, “Beer, and a whisky.”
YN nodded, reaching over to pop the lid of the beer, “Do you want ice in the whisky?”
The man just hummed, so YN got straight to work making his drink for him. It was different to that of the other men in the bar — watching him. Whilst they were loud and rowdy and always had something to say to someone – he was silent. He just sat, with the company of his only himself and drank his drink.
Snapping YN out of her gaze (which had been on the man for a few beats too long) was a call of her name from just down the bar. She walked over to where it came from, a man called Taylor who YN had become quite acquainted with in the last few days or so.
Most of the men (not all, obviously) that she had become acquainted with during the last few weeks were lovely. They loved to have a quick natter with her whilst she made their drinks, some of them flirted with her but she didn’t care (it was part of the job) and nobody bothered her. If one or two of the men when they were drunk got a little handsy or started to say things which would be deemed inappropriate, the other lads would circle her and make sure she was okay. She felt safe, which she was quite surprised was the case.
“A piece of advice,” Taylor spoke over the bar as YN started opening the bottles of beer for him and his friends, “Harry over there always orders the same thing, and he’ll drink the whiskey last before he leaves.”
“Thank you,” YN nods with a small smile across her lips, unable to stop her eyes beating over to him for a second – Harry.
“He’s a quiet one,” Taylor continues speaking, grabbing a few bills out of his pocket to pay for the drinks, “But harmless, I promise. To be fair, you’d think the man who founded the club would have more to say.”
YN’s eyes widen, she had no idea that Harry was the one who founded the club. She hadn’t suspected it at all.
“He founded it?” She asked with a slight raise of her eyebrow. She wasn’t trying to pry, but there were things that she wanted to know, and Taylor already had that buzz that made her know that he would be willing to answer any questions she had.
“Yeah, it was him and a few others,” Taylor shrugged, attempting to pick up the three bottles of beer all in one go, “A few years ago now, and it only grew from there.”
YN nodded once more and watched as he walked back to his table. She put the bills that he had given her for the drinks into the register and put the tip she had been given into her apron.
There was something about that man that had caught her attention from that first day, and yet she couldn’t put her finger on it. Now, it made sense. The aura that he had when he walked into the room, as well as the way he sat and held himself – he had a strong presence in the group without even trying.
YN had more questions, but she knew it probably wasn’t the best to pry right now. Instead, she just got on with everything that she had to do. She served drinks and cleaned up after herself right up until close. YN hadn’t realised when Harry had left, but he had slipped out without a single person realising.
She hummed as she swept the floors, tried her hardest to count the cash right the first time and put it in the safe before continuing with her other closing jobs. The chairs were off the floor, as much of the stickiness in the room that YN could remove was gone and the doors were locked and checked.  
Once she had stepped outside, and locked the door to the bar behind her, the late hour catching up with her very quickly – she realised at that point she wasn’t alone.
Looking over her shoulder, she saw that he was standing there, resting against his motorcycle with a cigarette dangling from between his lips. YN was confused but continued to lock the door and make sure that nobody could get inside. Then she turned, and that was when she saw Harry looking directly at her.
“Can I help you?” She muttered, fidgeting with the keys she was holding in her hand.
He inhaled the smoke from his cigarette, holding it for a second or so before he exhaled, “Heard you were asking questions.”
YN’s heart drops slightly, heat pulsating around her body, “Am I not allowed to ask questions?”
He ran his teeth over his bottom lip, placing the cigarette back in his mouth, “Can’t stop you from doing that, but any questions you have about me, you can ask me yourself.”
YN just pursed her lips and nodded, “Okay then… do you always stalk women when they’re leaving work?”
Harry didn’t seem shocked by her words, or react in any way to them at all, which was surprising to her. But, then again, she hadn’t seen much of a reaction out of this man this entire time she had known of him.
“Only the ones that have worked in my bar for a week.”
“Your bar?” YN widened her eyes, “Thought Mick owned it?”
Harry shook his head, “I do. Mick’s my employee, and so are you.”
“Do you not trust me or something? Think I’m walking away with pocketfuls of cash?”
“I would already know if you’d done that, and you wouldn’t be working here anymore,” YN just nodded, “But this side of a town can be sketchy at night, and you never know who could be lurking.”
YN just scoffed, turning to walk away from the man, “Thank you, but I can look after myself.”
“Suit yourself,” Harry shrugged, climbing onto his bike, and kicking the stand-up. YN could hear the engine turning on, the loud rumble filling the empty street.
YN continued walking, expecting him to speed past her but he didn’t. The low rumble continued down the street, even when she turned – the sound turned too. It was frustrating and annoying. All YN wanted to do was to get home, have something to eat and get in bed. Instead, she was having to deal with what was becoming an annoying rider, who couldn’t seem to leave her alone.
This continued for around ten minutes, and with each second that passed YN was getting more and more annoyed. Just as she turned onto the edge of her street, the apartment she shared with her roommate Ashley coming into view in the distance, she decided that enough was enough.
She stopped and turned around on the pavement, Harry pulling in on his bike to stop just in front of her. YN sighed and placed her hand on her hips.
“Do we have a problem?”
Harry rested his hands on his bike still, but was facing her, “No problem.”
“Then why are you following me home?” A small chuckle escaped her lips, “You know those strange people you were talking about earlier; you do know you’re acting like one of them?”
“You’re one of us now,” He shrugs, as though it’s the most obvious thing in the world – it certainly wasn’t for YN at all.
“That means you follow me home?” The confusion grows with every moment in YN, and yet Harry doesn’t seem the slightest bit worried.
“You didn’t want a ride,” He pulls his carton of cigarettes out of his pocket and lights one up, “Had to make sure you got home safe.”
“Right,” YN just nods, “Well, I think I can manage on my own from here. And, if I’m all of a sudden one of you should I expect my jacket in the post? Or do you do collection?”
With a final scoff, she turned and walked away from the man. This time, when the engine started, YN didn’t turn to look at Harry and instead carried on to her front door. It was only then that she turned to peer over her shoulder, just in time to see Harry speed past her and into the night.
She had an incline that this job was going to be interesting, but she had no idea just how much.
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It wasn’t necessarily a normal working pattern that YN had found herself in.
Sleeping for most of the day and being awake all night wasn’t necessarily the big girl working pattern that she had aspired to when she was younger, but for the time being she was enjoying it. It did mean that when Ashley returned from her nine-to-five working as a receptionist (YN couldn’t think of anything worse to be honest), YN was just getting ready to start her day.
YN was sitting cross-legged on the sofa, a half-eaten sandwich clutched tightly in her hand. She wasn’t too hungry, but she knew that if she didn’t eat something before, she left for work she would regret it later on. The second that Ashley stepped through the door and threw her bag down on the floor, she threw YN a quizzical look.
“What?” YN asked, wiping the mayo that rested on the curve of her lip off with her thumb.
“Do you happen to know anything about the smoking-hot rider staring at the apartment from across the street?”
YN’s entire face dropped, “What?”
Ashley walked over and dropped down on the other side of the sofa, reaching out to steal one of YN’s chips from her plate. Ashley seemed slightly unfazed by the newfound stalker YN had acquired, and that stressed the girl out significantly.
“What do you mean?” YN pushed herself up, making her way over to the window where there he was. Resting against his bike, cigarette resting from his lips sat Harry, staring at the front door to the building with an unreadable expression on his face,
“He’s been there since this morning,” Ashley adds to the conversation causally, running a hand through her hair which she had just pulled out of its undo, “At first, I thought he was waiting for Sandy, you know, from 2.B but then I saw the jacket and realised he must be here for you.”
“He’s not here for me,” YN shook her head, slapping the curtains shut and walking back over to her friend, “He’s stalking me, I can’t believe you’re not more stressed about this.”
Ashley just shrugged, “Worse people to be stalked by, I suppose. He’s one of Clover’s, he’ll be harmless.”
“No, Ashley, he’s not just one of Clover’s,” YN sighed, running a hand over her face before scooting around the apartment to grab her belongings, “He is Clover.”
It was Ashley’s face that dropped this time, “What do you mean?”
“That’s Harry,” YN pulled each one of her pumps on her feet, “He founded the gang!”
“You’re kidding,” Ashley all but screams, “Jesus YN, I knew I was concerned about this job, but I think you’ve done pretty alright for yourself.”
YN just shook her head. She grabbed her jacket, and her bag and made her way over to the door.
“If I go missing, you know who’s responsible,” With that, YN turned away from her friend and rushed out of the door.
She took the stairs down from her apartment at double speed, almost tripping over her feet multiple times. She pulled her jacket on just as she got to the front door. Just before she was going to push it open, just stopped and hesitated for a second. One deep breath in and out was all it took to compose herself, and then she pushed the door open.
Harry spotted her immediately, throwing the cigarette he had in his hand a few metres away from his bike, where a collection was beginning to grow. YN made sure to check the left and the right of her before crossing the road, not quite fancying becoming roadkill this early in the day.
“You’re lucky my neighbours didn’t call the cops on you,” Is the first thing that slips from YN’s lips, before she realises how stupid that sounds.
For the first time since she met him, a small smile crosses Harry’s lips. She had amused him, and oh did she want to do it again.
“You know you can’t stay out here all day,” She follows with, “I’m going to the bar now anyway.”
“I got something for you,” Harry pushed himself up off the bike and that’s when she saw it.
A denim jacket, smaller than the others that she had seen but still carrying the ever-so-known Clover’s Riders logo on the back. That four-leaf clover was known all over town, and towns for miles in every direction and now it seemed YN had one of her own. It would open paths for her but also close them as well. She knew that the second she accepted that jacket, things would change all over again.
“I don’t even ride, Harry,” She sighed, shaking her head slightly, “I’ve never been on a bike in my life.”
He just shrugged once more, “There’s always time to change that.”
YN toyed up her options, and it took a lot less time than she had thought it would to swipe the jacket from his hands. She shrugged off the one she was wearing and slipped her arms inside the material. It was the perfect fit, exactly what she would have chosen for herself. Harry beamed another smile at her and swung his leg over his bike once more.
“C’mon,” He tilted his head at her, “I have something I want to show you.”
“I’ll be late for work,” YN shook her head, but she couldn’t seem to stop herself from throwing her leg over the side of the bike and using Harry’s shoulder to help steady herself as she got on.
“You’ll be fine,” Harry spoke, and that’s when YN realised that whilst yes, she was probably going to be late for work, she was also on the back of the owner’s bike – so the trouble couldn’t be too grave, “Hold on tight.”
YN did as the man said, wrapping her arms around Harry’s waist. The second that the engine started, and Harry kicked the stand-up they went flying down the road, and she realised in that exact moment why he said tight. YN’s body lurched forward into Harry’s, her cheek resting against the leather of his jacket, and her hands tightening around him.
Once the initial fear had worn off, and YN finally peered over the man’s shoulder – she would be lying if she said that it didn’t feel in a word freeing. The wind through her hair, the chill of the speed at which she was going laced with the feeling of Harry pressed so closely against her. Sure, she had been scared but now she knew that there wasn’t anything to be scared of. It wasn’t a scary thing, instead, it was something to be enjoyed.
YN’s lips curled upwards, a slight giggle leaving them as she noticed they went speeding through a red light. Many, and by many YN meant most, of the riders had a back pocket full of speeding tickets, and lights that they’ve jumped and yet none of them seemed to care. It was as though all of the law-abiding parts of their brains didn’t function when they were on bikes. On second thought, even when they weren’t on the bikes the law-abiding parts of their brain didn’t function.
Harry pulled over just as they joined the road which took them out of the city. They had completely passed Clover’s, and YN hadn’t the faintest clue of how late she was for work at this point, but it didn’t matter. It would take a lot for this smile to leave her face today. Once the bike came to a stop, YN used Harry’s shoulder to push up off of it.
Harry sits on the bike, but his eyes never leave the girl. The way she almost looked like a baby deer as she got her grounding once she was off the bike, the way her hair stuck out in every and all directions, and most importantly the beaming smile that never left her face. For the first time in a long time, there were no thoughts in YN’s head. There were no worries about growing up and getting a proper job, or stress about money – it was completely and utterly freeing. She supposed that was why there were so many of the riders and she supposed they were all chasing that feeling.
“You’ve got to teach me how to ride,” She sighed, the blissful smile never leaving her lips.
Harry just nodded, “Whenever you want.”
“Really?” Her face widened in excitement.
Harry shrugged, “You’ve gotta know how to ride if you’re going to be a rider.”
YN just nodded, and almost jumped back onto the bike. Harry didn’t say anything when she wrapped her arms back around his waist, not a single gap between their bodies but it just felt so comfortable. Harry kicked the stand down once more and sprang straight into action, turning slowly around on the road before speeding up the second they were on the straight back to the town.
All YN knew was that she was going to savour the feeling of the wind in her hair.
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It was another Saturday night, and it was packed in the bar.
YN was so thankful that she could stay behind the safety of the actual bar and not venture out into the rest of the room. The men had just come back from a ride, and they were all excited and loud and wanting nothing but drink upon drink upon drink. She had been there from earlier on in the day today, and when Mick showed up later in the evening, she hadn’t managed to utter a single word but hello to him since.
All she could think of was the fact that once the rush had died down, it would be her time to go home and rest. In what felt like a very long few months of working every day (at first YN hadn’t minded, but she was slowly getting more and more burnt out) it was finally time for her to have a day off. Mick had graciously said to her the other day that he could handle Sunday on his own, and those words felt like gold slipping from his lips. She didn’t have a single clue of what she was going to do with her day, all she knew was that it was going to be relaxing.
She just had to get through this night first.
At first, the night seemed fine. Everyone was in good spirits and there was nothing more than a few drunken disagreements that sorted themselves out. YN had taken that as the opportunity to make her way over to where Harry was sitting and replenish his beer while he was there. It was then that the door was thrown open, and the entire atmosphere in the room changed.
What had at first been a lovely evening had changed within the second, and it was all because of a man that she hadn’t recognised. He didn’t have a rider’s jacket on his back, and that should have been YN’s first clue that this man was going to be in trouble. This was a riders’ bar, and those jackets were almost like a rite of passage. Without one, people stuck out like a sore thumb.
It became even more obvious to YN when the man beelined straight over to where Harry was sitting. He didn’t sit and instead leant over Harry, so his focus was on him. YN stayed close, but she didn’t want to make it too obvious that she was listening. She wasn’t the only one either – she could see other riders peering over at them from where they were sitting.
“You said if I did it, I’d get my jacket,” Those were the first words that came out of the man’s mouth – not even a greeting of hello, “I did it. Where’s the fucking jacket?”
Harry didn’t say anything for a second or so. Instead, he lifted his recently replenished beer to his lips and took a swag. He was doing as he always did – taking his sweet darn time.
“I said I’d think about it,” Harry mumbles, shrugging slightly as he did, “I’ve thought about it… and no.”
The man smacks his hand down onto the bar top, the sound echoing throughout the room. It silenced everyone, and all eyes turned to the two men. YN’s eyes looked towards Mick with a panicked expression on them but he shook his head, hoping that would calm the girls down.
“That wasn’t the fucking deal,” The man spits, coming right up into Harry’s face but it didn’t seem to deter the man at all, “The deal was to drop the shipment, I get the fucking jacket.”
Harry finally turned to look at the man, his stern expression never wavering, “Do you think I want someone like you, someone that doesn’t listen wearing one of my jackets?”
The man didn’t like that response, and it seemed as though as quickly as YN could blink her eyes the man was grasping the lapels of Harry’s jacket and pulling him up from the stool. He was then pushed straight into the bar, a slight grunt leaving his lips as he did. There was the initial sound of beer stools scratching on the floor, and other Riders were reading to split the two men up but all it took was Harry lifting one of his hands and they all stopped in their places.
“I don’t want someone who’s that willing to fight one of his men wearing a jacket.”
That was all it took for the other man to make the first punch. His arm pulled backwards, and his fist hit Harry straight across the jaw. The skin immediately went red, but Harry didn’t look like a man who had just been hit straight across the jaw. The bar stayed silent, obviously waiting for whatever Harry’s retaliation was going to be.
What YN, and certainly a lot of others in the bar hadn’t expected was Harry to reach behind him, to where his empty beer bottle was sat and hit the man over the head with it. The man fell to the ground, his grip on Harry letting go instantly. Harry lifted his hand, wincing when he noticed that a shard of glass from the broken bottle had lodged itself in his skin.
He just sighed, rubbing his forehead with his uninjured hand, “Get him out of here.”
Three of the men who were watching closely immediately listened to him, walking over, and picking the man up. They carried him out of the bar and were back to their drinks in what seemed like minutes. It was as though nobody truly seemed to care as to what had just happened and were more excited to get back to their drinks truly as though nothing had happened.
YN watched as Harry threw back the glass of whisky that had sat on the bar waiting for him (courtesy of Mick). That seemed like something that YN would have to take note of. With that, he dropped a few bills on the counter and stormed out of the bar. YN watched this and immediately started to pull her apron off her body.
“Mick,” The older man hummed from the other side of the bar, “I’m going outside for a break. I’ll only be a minute.”
The older man just threw YN a look, obviously having spotted who had left the bar just before she wanted to, “Be careful.”
YN just laughed, throwing the latch open, “I’m always careful.”
The second she stepped outside; she was shocked to see that Harry’s bike was still there, but he wasn’t sitting on it. There was a slight chill in the night air, and YN looked from left to right to try and spot him, but he was still nowhere to be seen. It wasn’t until YN made her way towards the alley that followed the side of the bar that she finally realised where he had gone.
It was dark, but not dark enough to miss the figure leaning against the wall with a cigarette hanging from his lips. YN wrapped her arms around herself, wanting to conceal at least some of the warmth from inside. As her shoes crunched on the path, Harry’s eyes turned to look at her. He was ready for it to be someone else, and it was almost as though when he noticed that it was her – his features seemed to relax.
“How’s your hand?” She asked, coming to a stop right in front of him.
He raised his palm towards her, “It’s been better.”
YN winced to herself slightly as she looked at his hand, seeing the shard of glass still sticking out of the skin. Whilst she didn’t have a first aid kit on her body at this exact moment, it was good that she knew where one was.
“Come with me,” She nodded, walking further down the alley to the bar’s back entrance.
YN didn’t even turn to make sure that he was following her, she just knew that he would be. She held the door open for him, and the one that opened to the office of the bar (where Mick spent most of his time during the day, sorting the books out) and pointed at the chair by the desk.
Whilst Harry sat down without a word to her, YN reached up to the shelf above them and brought the first aid kit down. Harry’s eyes watched her as she pulled tweezer, gauze, and some antiseptic to clean and dress his wound. It was all very silent, and still but caring.
“Can I?” She asked, checking sure it was okay to touch his hand.
Harry nodded, placing his hand in hers. To YN, she wasn’t sure if she was truly touch-starved that feeling of his hand in hers felt truly intimate. She got to work straight away, pulling the glass out with the tweezers ever so carefully before wiping the surface of the cut. Even though YN knew that it would have stung, Harry’s face didn’t show anything, only one raised an eyebrow slightly.
“I don’t think you’ll need stitches,” She mumbles, face still full of concentration on making sure the wound is fully clean before she wraps it.
Harry just nodded, “You see wounds like these before?”
YN nodded, “I’ve worked in bars before – of course, I’ve seen wounds like these before.”
Harry just nods, allowing YN to move his hand at her ease to ensure that it is wrapped tightly and securely. He opened his mouth once she had finished, as though he was going to ask her something, but he closed it straight away. She wanted nothing more than to tell him that he could ask her anything that he wanted to, but she didn’t want to scare him away.
“You’re all set,” She offered him a small smile.
“Thank you,” The words sort of felt foreign, but very sincere coming from his lips, “I… you didn’t have to.”
YN just shrugged, “Wasn’t going to let you bleed out – would’ve been bad for business.”
Harry offered her a small smile at her attempt at a joke, “I’m sorry about what happened in there as well… usually we try to keep those sorts of things out of the bar.”
“Harry,” His name came out of her lips softly, hoping that would be the thing to tell him that it was okay. That she wasn’t angry at him, “I know… it doesn’t bother me – I promise.”
He just nods, “I knew that, you know.”
YN furrows her eyebrows, “What do you mean?”
“That first day,” He reached out to her, and did the last thing that she would ever expect – grabbed her hand, “The way you dealt with some of the lads… I knew you were different.”
“It was you…” The words slipped out of YN’s mouth before she could truly register them, “You saw me that day.”
It all made sense. YN had noticed Harry that very first day that she’d appeared at Clover, and whilst originally Mick had said no, he had changed his mind and said yes. To YN, it had looked and seemed that Mick was the one who had made that decision, and yet it made sense that it was Harry to be the one who changed Mick’s mind. Harry, if he had been sitting at his barstool would have been a metre or so away from that conversation – and he would have heard every word that had been said.
“I did,” Harry nods, claiming every thought that YN had to be true, “I saw you, the way you spoke to them, the way you stood your ground and god, YN, I was hooked.”
That was the first time that YN had heard Harry speak her name, and she was addicted. She wanted to hear it over, and over and over again. He noticed the slight shift in her and used his legs to roll the chair he was sitting on closer to where she was resting against the desk. Then he slipped his uninjured arm around her body and pulled her down to him. She straddled his knees, relishing the feeling of his body beneath hers.
“I…” Her words came out as a whisper, “I felt the same.”
Relief. That was the look on his face – it was a true relief.
“You did?”
“God, Harry,” YN giggles, shaking her head, “I tried not to, but I would be lying if I said that most of my thoughts haven’t been filled with you. Wanting to know more.”
“You can know anything,” His thumb slipped underneath the thin material of her shirt, a heat spreading across her entire body from that one single touch, “Ask me anything, everything – I’ll answer. Whatever you want to know?”
YN pondered that for a second. She could have asked him anything, and yet there was one thought which was present in her mind more than any of the others. An hour ago, this question would have been risky – she just wouldn’t have asked it. Yet, in the safety of this room – away from peering eyes, or anyone who could make assumptions as to what it meant – she wanted nothing more than to ask it.
“Do you want to kiss me?”
Harry exhaled a breath, lifting his hand to rest against her cheek, “More than anything.”
YN nodded.
“Harry…” He hummed at the call of her name, “Kiss me.”
His thumb danced from her cheek, down to her lip. He ran it across the skin of her bottom lip, pushing down slightly so that her lips parted for him. The only sound in the room was YN’s heavy breathing, a response to the teasing that was on display right in front of her.
Then his face inched forward, and his lips were on hers. It didn’t take long for his tongue to slip past her parted lips, dancing with her own. This closeness to someone, the vulnerability – YN had missed it. She pushed her body forward towards Harry’s, slipping her hands in the curls at the nape of his neck. His hands, never mind the bandaged one which would have still caused him pain, rested upon her denim-clad arse. They found their home resting there, and YN wasn’t about to move them.
Harry pulled away from her lips, obviously needing oxygen as much as she did. But he wasted no time in dropping his attack down her neck, his teeth nipping the skin there. YN’s hands still rested in the curls at the nape of his neck, and heavy breaths parted from her lips.
“Harry,” She gasped as he started to suck at the sweet spot where her neck met her collarbone, “I need to get back to work.”
“No, you don’t,” He mumbled, and YN just rolled her eyes.
“I’ve deserted Mick,” She continues, “He might need help.”
“Mick’ll be fine,” He pulled his head up, resting on her chest as he peered up at her, “And anyway, I’m your boss.”
YN shook her head, “I need to go.”
Harry groaned but finally nodded, “Ride home with me?”
“Of course,” YN pecked Harry’s lips one last time pushed herself up from him and walked out of the room.
Harry’s eyes never left her the entire time.  
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“Harry, no, I’m going to tip over.”
When Harry had dropped YN at home last night, he had muttered the words that he would see her tomorrow. Before she could clarify that she wasn’t working, he had sped off on his motorcycle into the dark of the night. YN should have known, though, that Harry knew she wasn’t working. It became even more clear when Ashley shouted at her from the kitchen at around midday today, telling her that her Rider was waiting for her.
Instead of the annoyance that YN felt the first time, there was a skip in her step this time. She had taken some time that morning to make herself look that little bit more presentable and waited for him. After their kiss the previous night in the office, and the slight peck that he had given her when she had climbed off his bike yesterday.
When she had bounced over to him earlier, a smile beaming on his face she didn’t have a single care as to what she would be doing that day – all she knew was that she was going to enjoy it. Even when she climbed on the back of his bike and asked where they were going – the smile never left her face. He refused to tell her, though, saying that it was a surprise.
“Harry, I don’t want to,” YN shook her head, hands grasping tightly onto the handles of the bike, “I’m going to fall off, or I’m going to crash your bike.”
What Harry had planned for the girl was to teach her how to ride. Whilst at the start YN had wanted nothing more than to learn how to ride, now that she was sitting on Harry’s bike without him there – she was terrified. Harry was standing close to her, cigarette dangling from his lips and an amused expression on his face.
“You’re not going to fall,” Harry shakes his head, “I’m right here… and I promise I won’t let you crash.”
“You can say that Harry, but you can’t promise,” YN was sitting on the bike, with her feet resting on the ground and absolutely no attempt at all to move.
He threw his cigarette on the floor, moving over so that he could wrap his arms around her waist, his hands coming to rest upon hers on the handle. He turned the engine on, and even though it was YN’s hands on the handle, Harry was controlling it. They went very slow – they had to so that Harry could walk at the side of them.
“I’m going to let go,” Harry spoke after a minute or so, but YN shook her head.
“I’m not ready,” YN pushed her body into his slightly, “I’m going to crash.”
“There’s nothing for you to crash into,” Harry peels one of his hands off of hers, “I trust you… you’ll be fine.”
It wasn’t as though he was lying. Harry had driven them out to a deserted road just out of town. Close enough away that they’d be home at a normal time, but far enough away that there wasn’t any traffic which would interrupt them. There wasn’t anything but stone and grass around them, and whilst if YN came to a haphazard stop, it wouldn’t be the most comfortable thing ever – there wasn’t a lot of damage that she could do to Harry’s bike.
Harry let go of her other hand, and she was doing it. Granted, she didn’t go over 2mph, but she was still riding the bike on her own. She wasn’t comfortable enough to attempt to turn yet, so she just came to a slow stop a few metres further down from where Harry was. She kicked the stand down and climbed off the bike – turning towards Harry with a smile on her face.
“I did it!” She bounced over to Harry and wrapped her arms around his neck, his coming to rest around her waist.
“Never doubted you,” He leaned down to place a kiss on her lips, pulling her body flush against his. Before anything more could happen, the sound of crunching on the road, as well as the sound of a siren interrupted them.
YN’s heart started to beat rapidly at the sight of a police car inching towards them. Whilst YN had dealt with police before working in her previous bars, she hadn’t ever been out in the open with her and only one other person when talking to them. Knowing that Harry also ran a motorcycle gang added another level of worry to it.
Harry just pulled YN with him, going to rest against his bike. He looked completely unfazed, whilst YN truly was shitting in her boots slightly. The police car stopped right in front of them, and as the door swung open to the car, Harry lit up a cigarette and brought it up to his lips – again, making it aware that he was completely unfazed by what was happening.
“Styles,” The officer sighed, slamming his car door behind him shit as he walked towards the two of them, “You’re not an easy man to find.”
“Hmm,” Harry just hums, inhaling from his cigarette, “I had no idea you were even looking for me… I wouldn’t have just stood in the middle of the road if I knew.”
The officer chuckled, placing his hands on his hips, “We had reports last night that you attacked a man.”
Harry shook his head, “Couldn’t have been me.”
“It happened at your bar,” The officer took a step forward towards Harry, “Had reports that you hit him over the head with a beer bottle.”
Harry just chuckles, “Officer Thompson, I don’t have time for this he said she said bullshit. If you’ve got something to say to me, I think you should say it.”
The officer just hummed, “Where were you last night?”
“I was at the bar,” Harry nodded, “All night.”
YN started to panic from beside him, but she tried not to make it obvious. Harry must have complete and utter trust in his riders to not say anything to the police. It made sense now to YN as to why that man hadn’t been given a jacket. He had instigated the fight, and yet he had run straight to the police with it. He was a coward and a rat.
“Can anyone corroborate this?”
“I can,” YN was surprised at how strongly her voice came out, “I was there with him all night, I work there.”
The officer hums once more, his eyes dropping down to focus on Harry once more. YN realises that it’s then that the officer has spotted his bandaged hand. YN’s mind starts to spiral slightly, hoping that one of them will be able to come up with something quickly.
“What, uh,” The officer couldn’t hide the smile on his face, obviously thinking that he had found him out, “What happened to your hand, Styles?”
Harry opens his mouth, but nothing comes out, so YN interrupts. She giggles slightly, knowing exactly what type of character was going to be believable for this officer. But desperate times called for desperate measures.
“I’m so sorry, officer, that was my fault,” YN took a small step towards the officer, but not far enough that she wasn’t in arms reach of Harry, “See, I’m real clumsy. And yesterday, I dropped a whole crate of beer and Harry heard the crash, and he helped me clean up – unfortunately, he cut his hand in the process.”
The officer’s eyes moved between Harry and YN. There was no way at that point for YN to try and guess what he was thinking – or what he was going to say. Then, when the officer’s face broke out into a smile just the same as YN’s, she knew she had convinced him.
“I’m sorry to bother you, miss, and I hope you have a good rest of your day,” Then the officer turned to Harry, and the smile on his face dropped, “I’m sure I’ll see you soon, Styles.”
“And I’ll be looking forward to it Officer Thompson.”
Harry rested against his bike the entire time, whilst YN had her arms crossed against her chest. They didn’t say another word to each other until they watched the car turn around and drive away from them. It was only then that YN turned to Harry, who was running a hand over his face. Sighing, YN walked over to him, grabbing his hands (but making sure to be careful of his injured hand).
“You didn’t have to do that,” Harry shakes his head, pulling her hands up so that he can place a kiss on the back of them.
“I know,” YN nods, “But I wanted to.”
Harry rests his chin upon their connected hands, “I wanna take you somewhere.”
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YN would be lying if she said that she hadn’t thought about where Harry lived once or twice because she had. He had been to her apartment a few times to pick her up, and whilst she hadn’t necessarily wanted to be that forward and ask him where he lived, there was a part of her which wondered about it.
It was a strange circumstance. Where does the leader of a gang live? Where does he rest his head at night? Where does make his coffee in the morning? Whilst YN wouldn’t necessarily admit it, she was an inquisitive person.  
When Harry’s bike came to a stop outside of a garage, one that seemingly had an apartment attached to the top of it – it all made sense. Yes, the bar had to be doing well, with how many people were in it daily. But there had to be another way that Harry was making money, and it seemed as though this was it. She wondered if this had anything to do with the shipments that the other man had been speaking about.
He kicked the standout and gave YN the space the climb off before he did. He walked over to the shutter, unlocked the padlock, and threw it open. The apartment didn’t look too big, but the shop itself was huge. She had expected a car, maybe a few bikes – but she hadn’t expected rows upon rows of bikes lining the side of the walls. In the middle, YN could see the different stations where Harry and some of the other members worked.
“Are these all yours?” YN asked, her finger reaching out to run across the glossy black exterior of one of the bikes closest to her.
“Most of them,” Harry shrugged, dropping the shutter closed behind the two of them after pushing his bike inside, “Me and a few others, we buy them and restore them, make them better to sell on.”
“God, Harry,” YN turns to him, an expression of what could only be described as amazement on her features, “This is amazing.”
He just offered her a small smile, taking small steps towards her until he was close enough to wrap his arms around her middle. YN giggled slightly, resting her head on Harry’s shoulder as he pulled her closer to him.
“Pick one.”
The features on YN’s lips dropped again, “What?”
“Pick one,” Harry repeated, “A bike.”
“Yeah, I gathered that, Harry, I’m just confused as to why.”
He just shrugged, leaning back against the workbench near the two of them. YN turned around so that she was facing him, and Harry at once pressed his hands against her waist. It was funny to YN, to see the big, scary, gang member was so soft around her, and they hadn’t necessarily known each other very long.
“You said it yourself,” He shrugged, his hands pulling her between her body between his open legs, “If you’re gonna be a rider, you’ve got to ride. Seems like you need a bike to do that.”
“Yeah, but I’ll buy one,” YN spoke, as though it was the most obvious thing in the word, “When I have the cash for it.”
Harry shook his head, “No need, rather have you on one of these. Tested them myself, they’re all safe.”
YN just shook her head, propelling her body even further forward so that she could wrap her arms around Harry’s neck and press her lips against his. It was a clumsy kiss, with both of their teeth clashing and smiles upon their features but they did not care.
“Thank you,” She mumbled against his lips, pressing a flurry of chaste kisses to them afterwards.
Harry shook his head, “No need – pick one, baby.”
YN pushed her body up and started to walk up and down the rows of bikes until she spotted it. It was about halfway down the row, a bike with dark green glossy accents, looking nothing but sleek with the dark metal of the engine. It was the one that she wanted, and the second she was standing in front of it she knew it was hers. With that beaming smile across her features, YN turned and launched herself at Harry, wrapping her legs around his waist and his arms around his neck. His hands came to rest on the plump skin of her arse over her dark denim jeans. Even though YN suspected that she had caught him off guard, he didn’t show it on his face.
“How can I ever thank you?” She asked between a litter of kisses to his lips, a boyish smile crossing his features afterwards that YN wants nothing more than to bottle up and remember forever.
“That smile of yours is enough,” Harry nods at her, pressing another full kiss to her lips.
YN tilts her head to the side, turning to look at Harry with a slight smirk crossing her features. His eyebrows furrowed as though he already suspected she was coming up with something in her head.
“What’s going on in that pretty head of yours?”
“Maybe…” YN starts, her teeth clamping down on her bottom lip, hesitating, “Maybe there’s another way I can thank you.”
Harry’s eyes widened, as though he was finally catching on to the thoughts swimming around in YN’s head.
“We don’t have to,” Harry shakes his head quickly. “I promise I’m not expecting anything from you.”
YN just shakes her head, leaning forward to place another kiss on his lips. Her hands tugged at the curls at the nape of his neck.
“I know you’re not,” YN offers him a smile, “I want to. I promise.”
Harry shook his head, a groan emitting from his lips as he tugged her even closer to him if that was possible. YN giggles at his obvious joy at her statement.
“God,” He rests his forehead against hers, “I know it’s wrong, but I’ve been waiting to hear you say that.”
“Well, what are you waiting for?”
Harry turns, as though he’s going to walk out of the garage, but YN stops him. He furrows his eyebrows at her, and she just giggles once more.
“Want it here.”
“What?”
“Want it here, want you on the bench,” Harry groans once more, moving to drop her down upon the workbench that he had been rested upon earlier.
“Are you sure I haven’t dreamt you up?”
“Nope,” YN shakes her head, “I’m real.”
YN threads her fingers back through the curls at the nape of his neck, bringing his face back to hers. It doesn’t take long for their lips to connect once more. It wasn’t sweet or light. It was rough, as though both of them were finally able to do what they had both been thinking about.
Harry’s hands start to move down her body, resting on the hem of her jeans. She can feel his thumbs pressing down into the skin of her waist, and when it registers in her brain what he was trying to do YN pulls away, shaking her head.
“Not yet,” She lightly pushes his body to the side so that she can jump off the bench, “I haven’t thanked you yet.”
“You don’t have to,” YN’s hands rest on the lapels of his jacket, waiting for his nod before she pushes it off his shoulders.
“I want to.”
It takes just one swipe for Harry to pull his shirt over his head whilst YN’s hands come to rest upon his belt buckle. YN’s eyes widen at the sight of his exposed chest, as well as the tattoos that litter his sin. YN knew that Harry had tattoos; she had seen the ones on his arms multiple times, but it felt different to see the ones on his chest.
Her fingers work quickly to pull Harry’s belt buckle open, working on the button and zip of his jeans next. YN drops down to her knees, pushing Harry back slightly so that he’s resting against the workbench. Harry peers down at her, his chest heaving up and down in anticipation. Her hand rests upon the grey material of his boxers, palming his already semi-hard cock through the light material.
“You like teasing?”
YN shrugs lightly, “I have no clue what you mean.”
Harry laughs, watching her intently as her fingers loop into the band of his boxers, pulling them down to expose him to her. YN finds herself unable to pull her eyes away from his cock. She knew it had to be big from palming him through his boxers but seeing it before she made her mouth water and pressure to build in the pit of her stomach.
She placed a light kiss on his tip, which was already red and leaking from his obvious arousal. YN smiled, giving it a lick from the base to the tip before she used her hand to give it a few tugs. YN was confident in her moves, even though she had only done it a few times before in her life. She gained more confidence from the moans leaving Harry’s lips; they were deep and quiet, but she could hear them, and they caused her to squeeze her thighs together in hopes that it would give her some relief.
“YN… please,” It almost sounded as though he was pleading with her to do something, and YN almost moaned at the sound.
YN wraps her lips around the tip of Harry’s cock, beginning to bob her head up and down. One of her hands rested upon his thigh, whilst the other wrapped around the base of his cock, helping her with what she couldn’t fit in her mouth. Her tongue lightly grazed his tip, earning a louder moan from Harry that egged her on further.
“Fuck… YN.”
Harry’s hands came to rest in her hair, helping her to move her head up and down his cock. It was a light tug that caused YN to moan around his cock, and she could feel Harry resisting from bucking his hips to meet her. Instead, she continued to bob her head, speeding up in hopes that it would help him recover from her teasing.
“YN gotta pull away,” Harry says after a minute or so, his grip on her hair tightening, “I’m gonna cum.”
YN doesn’t stop, however, instead, she keeps going until she hears him moan louder and start to cum down her throat. When she looks up at him, his head is thrown back, and his eyes are closed. She works her head up and down until he’s finished, only pulling away then. When she looks back up at him he has a look in his eyes that makes her assume that they aren’t done.
YN giggles as he puts his hands on her waist and pulls her up so she’s standing, immediately placing a kiss on her lips, seemingly not caring about the fact that his cum was on them. YN’s legs nearly gave out then and there, and she had to place her hands on his biceps to steady herself.
“Did that show my thanks?” She asked, tilting her head to the side innocently.
Harry wraps his arms around her thighs once more, picking her up effortlessly.
“Damn right, it did,” Harry starts to walk over to the door that she suspects goes into the house, “But I’m not done with you yet.”
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It was quiet at Clover’s, a lull mid-afternoon on a Friday before everyone picked their spots for the night. YN had spent an hour or so cleaning and drying the glasses that had been used earlier in the day, making sure that they were to have enough for the night ahead.
The repeated motion of washing and drying gave her time to think, and more often than not, she found herself daydreaming about her morning, which she had spent in Harry’s bed, wrapped up in his arms. The two of them had been pretty inseparable before, but after he had gifted her the bike, it had seemingly gotten even worse, if that was possible. It had been weeks since that day, and YN could probably count on one hand the nights she had spent alone since then. Harry waited every night for her after work, and even when he couldn’t she would return to his house and wait for him there.
They hadn’t spoken about what they were necessarily, but that didn’t matter to YN. She didn’t need a label to know how she felt about Harry, and she assumed Harry felt about her also. For the first time in a long time YN was happy, and even though she was only a bartender and that useless history degree of hers wasn’t doing much – she wasn’t yearning for something else, for something better. YN truly felt as though it couldn’t get any better than it currently was.
The door to the bar pushed open, and whilst YN thought it was probably a rider coming in for a drink, she was shocked to see that it was Mick, obviously dropping in to start his shift. Thankfully, since YN had taken the day shift she didn’t have to stay until close tonight, meaning that she could spend more time in bed with Harry to end her week.
“Hey, YN,” She offered Mick a smile, “Just lemme drop my shit in the back and then you can go on break.”
“Thanks, Mick.”
Once he was back out, and she had passed over what she was doing to him, she made her way outside with the sandwich that Harry had made for her earlier. She was going to make her lunch, but Harry insisted that he make it for her. YN smiled at the memory of her sitting upon his kitchen counter, clad only in one of his t-shirts and a pair of pyjama shorts. They had laughed and joked and, at one point, had a break to dance around the kitchen to the song that was playing over the radio.
YN hadn’t had many relationships before, two at most she could think of, but they were never like this. They always felt transactional to YN. But with Harry, it truly felt as though they were two halves. There was a level of domesticity that YN loved more than anything with him, and every little task that they did together meant so much.
Once YN had eaten her sandwich, her thoughts filled with Harry and their morning. YN pulled her legs underneath her and began to read her book, knowing that she could get a chapter or so read before her break was over. It was a book about the Tudors she was reading, something that had been a passion of hers during her degree. It had been a while since she had read anything, but she supposed that the want came from her peace and happiness being restored.
She had just finished a chapter on Henry VIII’s Economic policy when she heard noise from the front of the bar. It was loud, and the voices that were speaking were quick, but it was muffled, so she couldn’t quite decipher what was being said. Putting her bookmark into place and closing the book, she pushed up from the chair and made her way towards the bar.
Mick was standing there, with three or four others in front of him. They looked panicked, and their words reflected that.
“Tell me again,” Mick placed his hands down on the counter, “I can’t tell a word you’re saying when you’re talking that quickly.”
“An accident, Mick,” It was Taylor who spoke, “There was an accident. We were riding along, and this truck came outta nowhere, sent him flying.”
YN moved towards them, her heart immediately starting to thump within her chest.
“Who?” Her words came out quickly, all of the men’s heads turning towards her, “Who went flying?”
“YN… I…” Taylor took a step towards her, his entire face dropping.
That was when she knew.
Her palms started to sweat, and her body felt heavy. There was a dizziness inside her head, and for one second she thought that she was going to fall to ground.
It was Harry.
“Where is he?” Her voice cracked as she spoke, the tears finally starting to collect within her waterline.
“YN…” Mick started.
“No, Mick,” She shook her head, “Where is he? Tell me where he is!”
Taylor took another step closer towards her, “I don’t know. The woman in the store across the street from where it happened phoned an ambulance, I left before they came. If I hazard a guess, they’ll be on their way to the hospital by now.”
YN nodded and before she knew it she was stalking her way outside and towards her bike. Ignoring the tears that were clouding her vision she climbed upon. Just as she was about to start it, a hand touched her elbow. It was Mick. She almost broke down crying there and then.
“Don’t,” Mick shook his head, “You can’t drive like that, darlin’. Let Taylor take you. Please.”
“He has to be okay,” YN shook her head, the sobs starting to wrack through her body.
Mick nodded, helping her off the bike, “He will be. But, if you wanna get there safely, in one piece let the boys take you.”
YN nods, walking over to Taylor’s bike and hopping on behind him. Mick gave her hand one last squeeze.
“Send him my love, okay?” Mick spoke and YN nodded, not trusting herself to be able to reply in that moment.
Taylor started the engine, and before she knew anything, they were hurtling down the street. This time, though, she wasn’t thinking about the wind in her hair.
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centrally-unplanned · 3 days ago
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Anyway I wanted to write something a little more serious about the politics of the day - a trend many noticed in the 2024 election, and its aftermath, is all of these notable non-politicians jumping onto the Trump ship. You have certainly noticed the big ones doing it, the Musk-types. What I have also seen is the middle-road types - the podcasts slotting the admin into their current healthcare fad, the policy bloggers being like "Dear Trump, this is how to truly reform the government - my pet idea" and offering support. A sort of opportunistic bandwagoning. This does happen every election to some extent, but it is notable that it happened way, way less when Biden was elected.
Some view this through the lens of fear, of Trump's open willingness to tax or prosecute those who don't bend the knee. That is part of it, for sure. But the other part is that Trump doesn't really believe in all that much - and that is actually a pretty big asset in politics. If you are a "Progress Studies" blogger or a union rep or a tech CEO, does Trump disagree with any of your key issues? He might not! You can just "convince" him, that is actually on the table, and he might take up your cause. And the Republican Party - not always, absolutely not always, but sometimes - will be browbeaten into going along with his whims even if they contradict their previous ideology. If you are ambitious and play your cards right, the structure of the Trump admin can very much reward people along the lines of these pet issues.
This is something the Democratic party could not do. All policy from the Biden admin came from a decade+ process of being discussed within the party. There were absolutely, 100%, "factions" jockeying for influence, but it was insiders, pre-established orgs along known lines, who were doing that jockeying. Is there any big policy that the Biden admin pursued that truly surprised you? That you were like, "woah, where the fuck did Biden get this idea from?" Not really, right? Because the admin was in so many ways an extension of the party.
Now this can be a real strength when your political parties are strong. When the locus of politics is within parties, then naturally they should be informing directions, and your goal as an admin is to court them. But that is pretty much the opposite of the current US political landscape - political parties have never been weaker. Voters hate political insiders, primaries are completely open and people who openly oppose the party sometimes sweep them, voters don't get their political opinion or w/e from politicians or party orgs. Parties are downstream of where more and more political influence comes from (though ofc they are by no means powerless, this is all trendlines). If you are one of these political outsider types, the Joe Rogans or Progress Studies bloggers or crypto coalitions or whatever, the Democratic party is just not going to work with you? You will be "heard", but if you want influence you gotta put your decade+ into the party first.
But Trump? You just gotta show up and kiss the ring. For talented people, this is actually a much better deal. It probably won't work, but the odds are still better than the alternative. And the biggest looming wrinkle is that this strategy is being hamstrung by Trump being a total idiot and backstabbing asshole - imagine how effective these strategies would be if someone competent was doing it. His left-field ideas are not only "annexing Greenland", but also doing it in the most hamfisted way imaginable. The core idea here isn't that crazy btw! Greenland is pushing for greater independence from Denmark, but gets a ton of subsidies so is loath to lose them if they go solo. You can see how an intelligent operator charting some soft power politics here could maybe make something happen, but Trump is a fucking nob and can't do that. So he is often a bad vessel for your niche ideas. But at least he shows up to the game!
People sometimes really want politics to be ideological. They want a coherent political party with a unitary philosophy to implement a cohesive agenda. I get this appeal, but this just isn't how US politics, or democratic politics more widely, works. It is an endless process of factional recruitment for one-off reforms, and otherwise managerial policy (in)competence. Ideology is not elected, a "mandate" does not run for office. Some individual people win and then they invent a mandate afterwards. Democracy does not reveal consensus, it manufactures it. And the US is moving more towards that direction, not less.
My fear is Democrats, in "widening the tent", will focus too much on that internal party process, on trying to make the Democratic Party "coherently" something that is more appealing to the median voter. Valuable work, to be sure, but the other side is you need to make it more appealing to people of influence or talent. As others have commented, it is kind of baffling how the Biden administration committed itself to a policy of green electrification and banning foreign car imports, and somehow made an enemy of America's biggest domestic green electric car manufacturer. You need to be, on the margins, less committed to any specific ideology at all, and instead open to actually winning support from diverse factions. Otherwise the other side will always be more appealing to anyone not of your ideology, because they kind of don't care about ideology. The Dems are already the "bigger tent" party, this should be their wheelhouse. They just need to update their tactics for the modern era.
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456-is-the-way · 4 hours ago
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Hi! I was wondering if you if you could do a smutty In-ho x fem! Reader x Gi-Hun. Something along the line of they are both pining and see each other go to talk to reader alone and decide to wait. In-ho talks to her during lights out and Gi-hun talks to her doing mingle. In the final fight, she goes with either in-ho or Gi-hun and the stand of at the end, ends with them deciding to truce for a moment and share reader.
A/n: OMG A smutty story with both the hottest daddies!? Yet people keep the requests coming because I have many more to write! I hope to post at least 3 stories a week only because I am returning to my job after my holiday vacation! ALSO regarding the TAGLIST IDK why it won't let me add people like some it won't bring their name up SO I am not sure how to fix that RIP Im sorry y'all!!! ALSO, late tonight or tomorrow my part 1 of my 4-part Gi-Hun story is coming out!! (Hints of In-ho x reader) will also be in the story! Next week I'll have 3 more requests stories done!
Trigger warning: SMUT
Squid Game Masterlist
In-ho x Reader x Gi-hun
Love and War
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Being in the games was the last thing (Y/n) was expecting, or at least in a life-or-death situation. She took a breath, looking over the group she was lucky enough to be in. Gi-hun did not hide the looks in her direction. Her (e/c) orbs meet his. (Y/n) could feel her cheeks warm up as Gi-hun winked. She turned away, looking at the ground quickly. How could two people be so obvious in their lustful looks? Their group quickly picked up on their subtle hints, flirtatious works, mindful touches, and lustful gazes. However, it sparked a rivalry between Gi-hun and his newfound friendship with Young-Il. The other gentleman also expressed his feelings towards (Y/n), which did not go unnoticed. (Y/n) happily reciprocated the attention she received from both of these handsome bachelors. It was lights out, and as normal, their group gathered in one spot, taking turns on night shift duty. Many thought of them as one of the strongest teams for now. In-ho sighed deeply as he was woken by Jung-bae. “Your turn.” He whispered. In-ho only responded with a grunt getting up to take his place by (Y/n). In-ho looked over her figure. It honestly pained him to lie to (Y/n) of all people. While scouting for participants, he would collect all their data and reasoning for poor financial situations. He never showed favor or pity towards anyone until now. Why did it have to be her of all people?
“I can take watch by myself if you need me to. I want you to have all the rest. Especially for the next challenge… I am nervous to find out what it may be.” In-ho whispered. She gave him such a warm and loving smile. In-ho had not felt butterflies like this in his stomach in so long the feeling was almost foreign. The way her eyes would almost sparkle while gazing into his. In-ho felt his breath be taken away every time.
“No, I won't allow you to not have a partner. We agreed on pairs of two. I am going to be fine. I could say the same for you, Young-Il.” She gazed into his eyes and before anything else could be said In-ho leaned in kissing her deeply. (Y/n) gasped but did not pull back once his warm lips dominated hers. In-ho cupped her cheek before letting his hand trail down squeezing her beast. “W-Wait.” Her voice seemed weak from the desire but quickly In-ho stopped all his advances.
“Fuck (Y/n) I am so sorry if I hurt you.” His eyes showed nothing but absolute worry.
“Young-Il, you didn’t hurt me. I just. We cant I-”
“You love Gi-hun. Don’t you?” He asked.
She looked away rubbing her temples. “I am unsure who I like. I have feelings for you both but if we act out on them… If you or him dies I would never be able to get over your death, or is..” She leans against In-ho resting on his shoulder.
“I understand…I love you.”
“I… I love you as well.” (Y/n) whispered cuddling into him.
….
After the night the next game had started early that morning, and (Y/n) had not been expecting what was to come. As the game commenced it felt very intense making sure the groups had the correct amount of people in each room. They even teamed up with new players they clicked with instantly. As it began getting lower in numbers for each door (Y/n) became nervous. She felt Gi-hun grab her hand gently. “I got you.” He whispered. Once the merry-go-round stopped and the number was ‘2’ he instantly took off with her ultimately forgetting about any of the others. Even shamelessly (Y/n) did not even look back for In-ho. Once in the room the door instantly shut. The female leaned against the wall as Gi-hun was breathing heavily on the other side of the room, “Gi-hun, are you okay?”
Gi-hun did not bother to answer before walking over to (Y/n) and kissing her deeply. The female lets a shaken moan out as their bodies are pressed against each other. His hands hold her waist before lowering down her backside and cupping her ass. “G…Gi-hun, babe, we cant.” Her body was on fire for this handsome older man.
��You love me… I know you do.” He let you go resting his forehead against yours.
“I…I do love you. I have since the moment I laid eyes on you. I can’t be with you Gi-hun. I wont risk getting attached-”
“Is it because of Young-Il? Is that the true reason? I heard you both talking last night. I know you have feelings for him of some kind… I want to know if he-”
“No, my love it's not because of Young-Il… I care for you both but if I got too attached and lost either of you I… I wouldn't be able to ever move on.” When the doors unlocked she took his hand, “Talk later okay?”
Gi-hun nods walking out as their hand in hand. In-ho instantly noticed and sent a glare at Gi-hun who met his gaze with a stronger one.
(Y/n) was soaked in her friend's blood as she was on her knees. Gi-hun and Jung-Bae beside her on their knees. In front of them stood a man who organized the games. With a quick hand motion from the man in the black mask, Jung-Bae was pulled away. Gi-hun went to help but a gun was quickly pulled out.
“Don’t” (Y/n) begged, tearing up. Her eyes widen as the gun slowly is lowered.
“I love you (Y/n).” The Front Man whispered she glared into his eyes.
“I hate you.” She glared. In-ho took a moment before removing his mask. Both (Y/n) and Gi-hun gave his a look showing all their bundled up emotions. “You… are the Frontman. HOW COULD YOU!” (Y/n) cried loudly .
In-ho leans down, “My real name is In-ho, I joined yes, but I never expected to fall in love with you! Please… Let me have you before anything else happens… Gi-hun.” He turned to his friend who reluctantly nodded they both desired you and that over powered all current feeling. The triangle guard let Gi-hun free before leaving.
“Please lets forget about all of this. For a few moments.” Gi-hun adds agreeing with In-ho. What felt like eternity she agrees.
Gi-hun instantly pulled her against his frame smashing their lips together. In-ho kneels down pressing against her back side kissing up (Y/n)’s neck. The female moaned loudly into the kiss as her body is sandwiched between theirs. “Fuck.” She gasped as Gi-hun trailed down to the other side of her neck. In-ho proceeded to slides his large hands under her shirt cupping her bare breasts. Her nipples already were hard. “Ngh! (Y/n) whined as he pinch them roughly pulling her buds harshly.
“Take her shirt off.” In-ho growled.
“Slide her pants down.” Gi-hun adds. (Y/n) had no time to react before her shirt was being lifted and sweatpants pulled down swiftly. Once practically naked she puts a hand on their bulges rubbing both men. They let out a shaken groan each, Gi-hun’s voice held a submissive tone while In-ho growled dominantly. Their already hardening cocks were at full attention. Gi-hun’s leaking precum at the tip. In-ho leans his forhead against (Y/n)’s shoulder cock twitching as she worked both touch starved men.
“F-Fuck I’m close.” Gi-hun whined.
In-ho chuckled,” Baby slow down before he blows a load in your hands. Let us inside of you.”
“MMmm… But will b-both fit?” She asked inhaling as Gi-hun reached down feeling her soaking wet panties.
“Fuck you are soaked honey. Did jerking us off turn you on that much?.. Yes dear we will both fit.”
(Y/n) nods and spreads her legs, In-ho nods to Gi-hun, She arches, feeling both their cocks brushing her entrance. “AHH FUCK Gi-hun. In-ho!~” (Y/n) was held up by the men who began roughly thrusting into her tight and warm pussy.
“Fuck baby you are tight.” “Your pussy was made for your us.” “Going to fill you up.”
Both of their praises made the knot tighten inside of her. “FUCK!” She cried out as their cock meet the perfect rythem until she felt the euphoria hit all at once. Her pussy clams down making both men cum deep inside. The three now lay there panting in pleasure. (Y/n) closed her eyes.
“I love you both.” Her voice is strained. Gi-hun instantly responsed with a quick ‘I love you back’ .
In-ho sighed deeply kissing her cheek knowing nothing would be the same after this. He loved her too much.
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ilysungho · 2 days ago
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20 and 29 for taesan pls :)
a/n: i had previously written a taesan voyeurism prompt, but he was a dom in that so this one's for sub taesan! for dom!taesan, you can read here -> prompt 53 + 57 wc: 1k contains: sub!taesan x dom!reader, perv!taesan, strangers to ???, humiliation kink taesan, voyeurism, semi-public setting, handjob, masturbation, little degradation, lowercase intended, prompts italicized
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“ahhhnn faster please, harder…”
the air in the room got thicker as the sounds from taesan’s phone escaped without a pause. sinful thoughts ran across his mind while one hand palmed the bulge forming on his pants, pre-cum staining the material. he wanted just one chance… one chance to make his dreams of fucking you come true, but every time he even looked in your direction, his boner couldn't help but form.
for you though, it was a shocker to see the lonely boy in the empty class, raggedly breathing while his shoulders shuffled mysteriously. this room had been your favorite one to study in after a long day, usually empty and resourceful with the whiteboard walls and standing tables. not to mention how it was tucked away in the corner of the building, so not many people came by.
black frames decorated taesan’s face as he concentrated on the video, imagining your boobs engulfing his length and your pretty face fucked out from the previous rounds, wanting to replicate the scenes he watched. he kept palming himself, the moans in the video enhanced with the noise cancelling earbuds he put on.
and in true loser fashion, he just had to moan your name. while you stood right behind him.
“say that again pretty boy.” you whispered into his ear, fingers holding the removed earbud. taesan gasped, scared to look back while he turned his phone off and attempted to not freak out at your voice. “y-y-y… y-y/n…” well that was an epic failure…
“i didn’t know you thought of me that way. and you even know my name, so why don’t you tell me yours?” you had a sly smile as you turned his chair to face you, taking a seat next to him. he was red as a tomato facing downwards, fixing his glasses from falling off his embarrassed face. not only did his crush find him watching porn, he also had to say their name out loud… great job idiot.
you clicked your tongue at his silence, pulling his chair close to yours now. “such a naughty boy. not even telling me your name, yet you touch yourself to the thought of me? well, go on. i’d like to see that in action.”
"w-w-what?! no! no i can't!!" he looked at you, still blushing hard. but you looked at how his jeans had a dark spot. in a teasing manner, you got up and turned around. "ok then. i'll go study like i was supposed to."
taesan's eyes widened at your quick decision, grabbing onto the sleeve of your button down. "wait... i-i'll do it.... but only i-if... only if you let me do you too!" you didn't know he would react like this, but you liked seeing how desperate he got. composing yourself, you sat back down on the chair in front of him and nodded, at which, he visibly gulped.
"go on then." tilting your head to the side, you crossed your legs and sat back, hands resting on the armrests. taesan nervously touched the stained fabric, feeling even more turned on by the whole situation (it was as if he enjoyed the humiliation...).
he palmed himself some more before unzipping and pulling out his dick under his boxers. you raised your eyebrows at the sight, his long cock glistening under the lights while the veins on it ran all throughout up till his red tip. he hissed under his own touch, thumb covering his slit, as he wrapped his fingers around himself.
"tell me how you want to do me, pretty boy." you smirked as he jerked into his hand, caught off guard by the new request you gave. but he complied, his mind running at full speed with everything he could think of to do to and with you.
"f-fuck you," thrust, "eat you o-out," thrust, "suck y-your tits," thrust, "a-and more..." thrust.
he imagined your boobs in place of his hand like the video he was previously watching, eyes closed to really visualize it. his posture was so messed up though that you got entertained by it all. he looked oh so pathetic, hovering off his chair as he thrust into his hand, and you knew that it was something you would love to tease him about some other time.
"be more specific cutie, otherwise you might not get what you want." you took your feet out of your shoes, raising it up to touch his balls through socks. taesan fell back onto the chair, his eyes shooting open as an involuntary moan came out. the sound caused you to press harder onto him, wanting to hear it again as he squealed out.
“‘m gonna use m-my tongue—aahn— to eat you o-out. and t-then FUCK i’ll lick y-you clean until you c-cum again. nghh i-i’ll use my dick a-after to fuck y-your tits and s-spill my c-cummgh on your body. then i-i’ll finally l-let your p-pussy get f-fucked…”
“that’s a lot of talk coming from a whining bitch under my foot huh pretty boy?” taesan looked straight at you then, trying to settle down on his seat to readjust how he jerked off. the eye contact made him feel hot but his competitive nature came to show as he pointed his cock at you, tonguing his cheek to not make any more sounds.
you both stared long and hard as he continued on, his hand working harder than it has ever before to help his dreams come true. the concentration produced perspiration as he felt close. and with a few more hard pumps, he shot his load right onto your shirt.
you stood up while smirking, amused at his bravery. after taking your shirt off, taesan watched as you came and took his hoodie off of him, redressing with that instead.
"i'm taesan..." he breathed out while coming down from his high, sweat trickling from from his forehead to his jawline.
“well let’s make your thoughts a reality, yeah taesan?” you said, grabbing your stuff while waiting for him to get ready. it might be your place or his, but it’s the start to a new bond between you two.
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citystain · 17 hours ago
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if there r any grammatical errors or typos idgaf i dont want 2 know
cw : none aside from reader being referred to as 'girl' twice
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there's something achingly sublime about percy jackson. it's completely and utterly terrifying how many emotions one person can inspire.
the way the light bends around him, like the sun shines just for him. his hair, a tangled, sandy mess. he smells so pleasantly of the sea, his smile as comforting as it. you love him. you know this, but watching him skip rocks on the shore in all his glory is a nice reminder.
he looks back at you with a grand smile as he breaks his own personal record of five with one more splash. you give him a nod, "good job."
"come on," he juts his head in the shore's direction. "it's your turn."
you shake your head, chin tucked safely behind the thick scarf that shields you from the cold breeze the lake provides. "no way. i'm not taking my hands out of my pockets."
his laugh is annoying and haughty as it comes, the way his cheeks blush from the cold help pacify you though.
"oh, my sweet sweet girl. you think i didn't come prepared for your every excuse?" his tone is smug and the look on his face is far too proud for a guy holding the ugliest pair of gloves you have ever seen.
you raise a judgmental brow. "is this some sort of roundabout way of telling me you robbed someone's grandma?"
he rolls his eyes at your sarcasm. "you're very clever, now will you please humor me?"
you don't want to put the gloves on. they look like they're seconds away from disintegration, but the sweet smile percy's sporting is enough to convince you with the exception of a petulant pout as you walk towards him and slip the gloves on.
his grin is cheshire as he hooks a gentle arm around you, pressing a kiss to your cheek. "attagirl." the pebble he presses into your palm is warm from his own. he gives you some convoluted, only-makes-sense-in-percyland instruction which you follow to the best of your abilities, only for the rock to sink pitifully.
you cringe in distaste at the failure and turn right back around to sit on the tree stump you occupied before. percy's laugh is booming enough to have made the water ripple as he sits down next to you, an arm thrown around your shoulders. "terrible, but not bad for your first try."
you immediately aim to pinch his side but both of your layers make the attempts fruitless. still, he curls his body away from your fingers with small giggles, all while trying to catch your hands. you let him, letting out your own shrieks of laughter as he pins your arms to your sides, peppering kissing all over your face.
you love percy jackson. every last bit of him.
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girl-named-matty · 2 days ago
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𝐇𝐚𝐲𝐫𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐂𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐔𝐧𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞: 𝐀𝐧 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐝𝐮𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧
Welcome to... The Hayrose Cinematic Universe!
An alternate universe of Hogwarts MC's that all started with one simple ship between two delusional nerds (AKA me and @acslytherpuff <3) and spiraled out into a whole separate universe! I'll show you around! I'll show you around! Buckle up because we got a lot to go over!
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Meet the crew!
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These two lovely souls are Alvin Hayoung and Matty Ambrose--hence the ship name "Hayrose". You guys have probably heard and seen a lot of them if you've been following my blog these past couple of months. These two are the kickoff to the HCU! It all started with one look when Alvin was immediately smitten and well the rest is history.
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This is Cassie Luna, Alvin's best friend and loved by many. She's practically the whole reason why Matty and Alvin are together. Both reluctant to confess, Cassie gave them just a little (very big lol) push in the right direction (as in she threatened to feed alvin to the dementors, dont ask) and they were together by the next week.
Speaking of Cassie, let's get onto her boyfriend, Alex. Now, if it isn't already obvious, Alex is Alvin's older brother. Guess the four of them are completely stuck together forever. Alex is your typical bad boy but he's got some soft spots, especially for Cassie. He's a year older than Alvin but returned during Alvin's 7th year to finish his own last year at school and of course, met Cassie and immediately knew she was the one for him. (Alvin, Cassie, & Alex by @acslytherpuff)
Now that we've introduced those four, let's get into the groups! (I swear we were all on something while coming up with these names, I'll leave it at that LOL)
"The girlies", "The Rizzies", and "The Baddies," Pretty gen-z for some Victorian teens, right? The Girlies
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This is Amberlyn Salters, but we all just call her Alyn. She's a part of "The Girlies" and ironically, so is her boyfriend, Ominis. That's because he knows all the gossip so we let him tag along. And while she can be rather quiet, she's usually analyzing something in her mind, trying to answer questions, or breaking them down. A true Ravenclaw if you ask me. (Alyn is by @ps-cactus)
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This is Vittoria "Tori" Lewis, probably one of the coolest girls ever. Lover of all things caffeinated, she's a joy to be around. Her girlfriend, Poppy, is also an honorary member of "The Girlies". Tori brings the much needed chaos, when she has enough caffeine in her system, of course. She's loyal and a hard worker, staying true to the Hufflepuff house reputation. (Tori by @espressoristretto-patronum)
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This is Valentine "Val" Black and she's one of our spitfires. While simultaneously being able to deal with her family, she also somehow manages to keep up with her boyfriend, Cal, and their 24/7 third-wheel Ale, who we'll introduce later. They are the CalValAle trio and she's got those boys on an impressively tight leash. And while she's quite the loving girl, don't try to take advantage of her. She is in no way a pushover and she'll let you know that. (Val by @savingsallow)
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This is Johanna "Jo" Newman. She's both intelligent and the first one to dive into danger if needed--which gives her boyfriend, Silas, a heart attack every time. Thank goodness his hair is already greyed so he can't get any more greys with her. But Jo is extremely loyal and if you ever need random facts, Jo is definitely the person to go to. Her mind is an endless pit of random knowledge. (Jo by @ravenwind-75)
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This is Damien Evans and yes he is a part of the girlies but thank goodness his boyfriend Sebastian is not (last time he tried to infiltrate, it did not go well). Besides having the most amazing hair on the planet, Damien is involved in all of the girlies activities, including the sleepovers. He's the hair braiding champ 💪. His creativity is unmatched and he's quite compassionate as well! (Damien by @theladyofshalott1989)
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This is Ellie Crawford and she's actually a part of both the girlies and the baddies, Ellie is the protector of the group and can scare anybody out of a fight before it even starts. She also protects the girlies secrets from her other group, the baddies, when they ask what's going on at the sleepovers. The tea is hot y'all. Ellie is confident, full of hilarious sarcasm, and is quite the morally grey character you can't help but love. (Ellie is by @accio-bagel)
Onto the Rizzies
The Rizzies consist of three hufflepuff's who, or at one point, have absolutely no rizz but yet give each other silly and ridiculous dating advice but somehow it worked? This trio consists of Alvin and two others I will now introduce.
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This is Theodore Lupin--Or Theo for short. And yes, it's that Lupin you're thinking about. And it's really ironic that he's even in this group because he's quite literally too afraid to talk to most women anyway, unlike his best friend Cal. Half of the time, it's just Alvin and James trying to get him out on a date... he'll get there. (update: he finally got a girl!)
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This is Jaimsen "James" Hisui. He made it into the Rizzies by being flirtatious and having really bad pickup lines that he's really creative about, actually. But I guess it worked since he pulled his boyfriend, Ren. His outgoing personality definitely played a part in that too! He's also amazingly creative (and very hyper lol) but oh so friendly! (James is by @leaping-toadstool-caps)
Onto the Baddies!
So, we already know Alex and Ellie, so let's get on to Ale, Cal, and Freddie.
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Callan "Cal" Gaunt and Alejandro "Ale" Salvatori are quite the interesting duo who happened to like the same girl for a while--hence the love triangle situationship thing that nobody can ever keep up with. While Ale third wheels Cal and Val most of the time, he's still very loved by the both of them. Both of these are rather flirty and witty but under the surface of that, Cal is quite the passionate and soft guy and Ale immerses himself in things such as poetry. Both are very loyal to the people they love. (Ale also belongs to @savingsallow)
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Fredrick "Freddie" Harpis is the last one in the Baddies group. He doesn't even know how he got here, his girlfriend, Ellie, just pulls him around to things most of the time. Also with a little influence from his sister figure, Matty, from time to time. He's a little rough around the edges but deep down he's a total softie he just won't admit it :) (Freddie by @freddiestheproblemchild)
We're done with the groups--but did you really think we were finished there? Think again.
The Evanders
These are the Evander brothers, Killian and Silas. While Silas is a normal Slytherin student, enjoying the company of his girlfriend, Jo, and his friend group, his older brother Killian is always finding ways to meddle in things. Nobody knows why he's so dedicated to annoying the group, or getting involved in the messes, we can just assume it's a pastime of his for whatever reason lol.
So just know, wherever the HCU crew is going, Killian is probably soon to follow.
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Honorable mentions!
This is Phillip! He's Professor Fig's adopted son and a good friend of Matty's whom he met in Charms class and he is a fellow member of the Gryffindor house. (By @endeavour12345)
This is Danny, he's also a good friend Matty's but he's also good friends with Silas! He and his girlfriend, Adelaide, can often be found together around the herbology greenhouses or up in the Ravenclaw hall, studying with Silas. (By @catohphm)
These two are Jamie Ambrose and Amara Ambrose. Jamie is Matty's "Brother" (they're basically twins with how alike they are) and Amara is their chaos cousin. This family tree is complicated! (Jamie by @rypnami and Amara by @boxdstars)
This is Helena Elwyn-er, well Professor Elwyn. She showed up a year ago and gave the whole school something to talk about when she began her relationship with our other Professor, Professor Sharp. Apparently they had known each other for years and well, now they're the two professors everybody knows are dating even if they haven't outright said it. She's like an extra mom to a lot of the school and to be honest, she probably knows more students than anybody else. And will always be the first to help them get out of detention :)
So, how did all of this happen?
Backstory
The origins of the HCU have changed quite a bit but to accommodate for so many MC's, we've come up with quite the silly answer that involves Sebastian being an idiot and accidentally resulting in the start of the HCU.
Alvin, Alex, Cassie, Alyn, Cal, Theo, Val, and Ale, all existed in the same universe and knew each other (except for Alex until 7th year), all attending school at the same time. In this universe (the HCU), all the crazy 5th year stuff doesn't take place. It's a relatively all around peaceful universe. Of course, you still have people like the Gaunts and Killian always meddling around but that's better than the crazy fifth year stuff, right?
Meanwhile, Matty, Ellie, Jo, Tori, Freddie, Damien, and James were all off in their own separate universes, dealing with the absolute hell that was their fifth year LOL. However, when they were down in the catacomb with Sebastian, dealing with the relic, something went wrong and each of them were sucked out of their own universe and sent to the HCU all at the same time while their version of Sebastian was left very confused.
Naturally, they were very confused as to why this universe was so different. Why wasn't the fifth year here like the one they had experienced? Of course, they all immediately went to the school looking for answers. Let's just say every single professor were very confused as to the random influx of students and Professor Fig was left wondering why so many of them seemingly knew him so well (although he welcomed the love with open arms, alongside his wife, Miriam, of course.) And while it took forever, eventually it was worked out but they decided to stay, enjoying the peacefulness that came along with this universe.
By the time 7th year rolled around (which is when the HCU is set), things had been worked out and everything has been accommodated and figured out and all of them are now living very happy lives within the HCU :)
(don't ask about what happened to their prior universes, we don't know. that was too much work to go through.🤣)
I hope you all enjoyed and will enjoy coming on for the ride that is the Hayrose Cinematic Universe!
Disclaimer: This entire universe is a completely separate one from that of each MC's original lore (save for a few). This idea is simply just a bunch of friends having fun and nothing complicated is meant by it lol.
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calliecopper · 1 day ago
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Ian Gallagher Being His Own Person, and Why That's Controversial
A meta about Ian's story during his time away from Mickey, and the hate his character receives for it. Inspired by @dazzle02 :)
How many times have you heard somebody say that they skipped season 8 of Shameless because Mickey wasn't in it? How many times have you heard somebody say that season 7 is only good during Mickey's episodes, or that the story is boring without Mickey in it, or that Ian's S6-8 arc was boring without Mickey? How many times have you heard somebody proclaim that Ian wasn't a good partner to Mickey?
Mickey is undeniably THE fan favorite character of the show, and with that comes a tendency for fans to defend him tooth and nail, even when he is in the wrong, and refuse to see any other points of view. Characters who go against Mickey in any way receive a harsh amount of criticism that sometimes is not fully justified. This applies even to Mickey's main connection to the story: Ian.
During season 5 and onward, some fans hold Ian's actions against him very harshly when I feel he deserves a bit more empathy. Of these, there are three main things people criticize his character for during seasons 5, 6, and 7 that I feel are not given proper analysis and thought by fandom.
Disclaimer before we get in because people feel very passionately about these two: Every interpretation of a character is entirely unique to each individual viewer, and these are just my opinions. This is in no way an anti-Mickey post, so as you read, keep in mind that any criticism toward him is not meant to make him out to be a bad character. Don't bite me.
Season Five: The Breakup of All Time
I think a large part of why people get so upset with Ian for the breakup is because of the growth Mickey experienced in seasons 4-5 leading up to it.
Mickey in seasons 1-3 is in extreme denial of being gay, and when he grows feelings for Ian, he lashes out and treats Ian like shit. Seeing Mickey's slow growth starting in season 3 brought interest to his character, and in season 4 with his major growth during his coming out, he becomes very compelling to a viewer. After all the angst that it took to get Mickey to finally open up, there's a natural desire to see that positive growth and relationship development continue. When Ian throws a wrench in that by breaking up with Mickey in season 5, people get upset, and they're going to direct that toward Ian because he is the easiest to blame.
There's the sentiment of, "Mickey came out for Ian, took care of Ian, and supported Ian when he needed him most despite his faults. Why is Ian leaving Mickey in the dust when he now needs him most?"
This is honestly not an unreasonable thing to feel when looking at things from Mickey's perspective.
But, when you take a look at Ian's character, and you really think of his motivations in that moment, his decision to break up is actually very understandable. Ian didn't break up with Mickey because he thinks Mickey is a bad partner or because he doesn't love Mickey enough. He broke up with Mickey because he thought that's what was best FOR Mickey.
I think comparing the breakup to their fight over marriage in season 10 to be an effective way to understand Ian better.
In season 10:
"How do you know you love me? Huh? How do you really know? I'm bipolar, right? I don't know who I am from one day to the next, and I can't guarantee shit. So why do you wanna spend the rest of your life with me?"
- Ian to Mickey, S10E9
Compare this to this conversation during the breakup:
"You used to love me. Now you don't even know who I am. Shit, I don't know who I am half the time... You don't owe me anything."
"I love you."
"The Hell does that even mean?"
- Ian and Mickey, S5E12
I feel that Ian's mindset is pretty similar in these two moments. In season 5, he is still grappling with his diagnosis, and he has no frame of reference of how a healthy life with bipolar can look. Everybody has been comparing him to Monica, and he himself seems to oscillate between thinking he is like her and not like her, so in his mind, he has nothing to offer anymore.
Then, in season 10, in his mind he proved himself right. He tried to get his shit in order, lived happily and found peace with his diagnosis, and then he fucked it up. He had an episode, and he lost everything he fought so hard to have. He has practically ruined his life because he DID what he FEARED he would:
"I hate the meds. You gonna make me take 'em?"
"You get fucking nuts when you don't."
"Are you gonna want to be with me even if I don't?"
- Ian and Mickey, S5E12
That conversation isn't Ian saying he isn't going to take his meds, given how in season six, he IS taking his meds. I interpret his above statement to be a warning to Mickey. Because Monica has tried to get on her meds before, has tried to get better, and has failed many times. IAN has gone off his meds willingly twice now. This is him telling Mickey, straightforward, "I do not like the meds, and there will always be a risk of me deciding not to take them."
And in seasons 8-9, he does exactly that. He goes off his meds, and he destroys everything he built for himself. That's part of the reason why he hesitates to marry Mickey in season 10, and part of the reason he breaks up with Mickey in season 5.
Ian views himself and his disorder to be a burden on the people he loves. He believes that Mickey will be better off without him.
"I don't want you sitting around, worrying, watching me, waiting for me to do my next crazy shit."
- Ian to Mickey, S5E12
Because Mickey HAS been doing that. Ever since he was diagnosed, Mickey has been watching Ian like a hawk, acting like a nurse, which frustrates Ian.
"Fuckin' nurse now?"
[...]
"I'm sick of your whiny, pussy crap. I don't need a fucking caretaker, alright? I need the shit-talking, bitch-slapping piece of Southside trash I fell for. Where is he? The fuck is he, Mickey?"
- Ian to Mickey, S5E10
But, of course, Mickey doesn't see it that way. To Mickey, Ian is anything but a burden he wants to unload.
"It means we take care of each other. [...] It means thick and thin, good times, bad, sickness, health, all that shit."
- Mickey to Ian, S5E12.
Mickey would do anything for Ian. He confronted his worst fear by coming out, stayed with Ian even after the infidelity, defended Ian after he kidnapped his son, and tried his best to understand a mental illness he had no prior knowledge about. Yet, Ian still won't commit to him. After everything, he still isn't good enough.
"I'm not saying never!"
"No, you're just saying you don't love me enough now."
- Ian and Mickey, S10E9
And Ian, meanwhile, thinks that HE isn't good enough for MICKEY. He has been diagnosed with a lifelong condition, one that he has seen ruin lives firsthand, something that will be a part of him for the rest of his life, and he doesn't wanna tie Mickey down to that life.
It's all one massive miscommunication.
Finally, I think the part that is the most confusing to fans regarding Ian's mindset during the breakup stems from his moments with Monica in S5E11 and S5E12.
Specifically, the parallels between these two conversations.
"Ian, there's always gonna be people that are gonna try and fix us. And you can never make those people happy. Like it breaks their heart just to look at you."
"Yeah, um, even Mickey now."
"He's your boyfriend, right? [...] I'm sure he means well, but you need to be with people who accept you for who you are. And they're out there. You should never apologize for being you."
- Monica and Ian, S5E11.
Vs.
"What the hell is wrong with you?"
"Too much! Too much is wrong with me. That's the problem, isn't it? Too much is wrong with me, and you can't do anything about that. You can't change it. You can't fix me, 'cause I'm not broken. I don't need to be fixed, okay? I'm me!"
- Ian and Mickey, S5E12.
Monica's interpretation of the relationship seems to paint Mickey in a negative light. "He means well, but he doesn't get it," or something along those lines. Based on her previous experiences with the diagnosis, she has come to the conclusion that people like Mickey or Fiona, who try to get them to take medication and are saddened by the diagnosis, are being controlling, and do not love them for who they really are. That's why she always went back to Frank; he actively tried to get her to NOT take her meds or get better, and did not encourage her when she DID try to get better. So, to her, being off her meds IS the TRUE version of herself, and the people who can not accept that do not accept her.
But I think, while Ian's lines parallel Monica's, that he does not think the same way that she does.
Toward the end of season 5, Ian seems to do a complete 180 from his previous statements on his similarities with Monica.
"You flushed your pills? You get thats a full-on Monica move, right?"
"I'm not Monica."
- Ian and Fiona, S5E8
Vs.
" [...] Cause they all say how alike we are."
"That's probably not a compliment."
"Uh... No, I think it is."
- Ian and Monica, S5E11
This happens in the wake of his arrest, after Ian's siblings talk about him to the military police. Many of their comments seem to hit Ian in a way that makes him feel misunderstood or like a burden.
Debbie: But he's been acting crazier for longer than that.
Lip: Yeah, at least this past year.
Officer: How would you characterize his behavior?
Debbie: Compared to how he used to be... He's different.
Lip: He'll go back and forth from, you know, being depressed, to, you know, incredibly wound up. I mean, he ran off with a baby for no reason.
Debbie: He almost hit me in the head with a baseball bat.
Fiona: Our mother was bipolar, so we know what it looks like. She put us through Hell, and- I'm not saying you put us through Hell, but when they're manic they can be destructive.
Officer: In your opinion, does he require medication?
Fiona: Yes.
Officer: Is he unable to care for himself?
Fiona: Sometimes, yes.
So, when Ian talks to Monica when they reconnect, Ian expresses loneliness and a feeling of isolation.
"I'm really glad you came, yknow? I just... I needed someone to talk to who... gets it."
- Ian to Monica, S5E11
When Monica tells Ian to not be ashamed and that she loves him for him, she is kind of acting like his Frank. The meds have been taking a toll, and recovery is so difficult that running with her and getting validation from the only other person who could "get it" is an easy choice to make. I think the combined factors of Mickey treating him so delicately, his siblings laying out his flaws so plainly, and his mother's open acceptance creates a feeling of bitterness or shame, and Ian is hoping to find comfort in his mother.
But it doesn't go the way he expects it to.
At the diner, he thinks that Monica is going to prostitute herself for money, and is relieved when she doesn't. It's likely he was thinking of his own stint at the Fairytale in this moment.
Then, he recalls a moment from his childhood that he does not look upon fondly, only for Monica to refer to it as "good times."
He meets Monica's partner and discovers he is an aggressive teenage meth dealer that she is helping to sell the meth.
I think Ian has a true moment of clarity during this. He had thought that he was vindicated, that everybody else was wrong, that they didn't understand, that Monica was right, and that he was perfectly fine just the way he was. But then he sees what Monica considers to be "a happy life."
"Ian, I'm finally happy. People like us, we can be happy. I love him, and that's the most important thing, to find somebody to love, right? Who loves you back for who you are. I want that for you. I love you. We're gonna be okay. We're gonna be okay."
- Monica to Ian, S5E12.
Monica's perception of life is warped. What she considers a good life is living in a trailer selling meth. Good memories are traumatic memories for those around her. True love and support is an aggressive teenage dealer, or Frank Gallagher.
A simple drive to Ian was a horrifying kidnapping to Svetlana. Doing a porn that was no big deal to Ian was a betrayal of trust to Mickey. Joining Monica and ignoring the calls of his well-meaning but ignorant family to Ian was a painful and worrisome disappearance to them. Ian's perception HAS been warped, and he's crashing back to reality, realizing that he has run off with MONICA, realizing that he can't continue down the same path as her, and needs to go home.
He's come to accept that he is bipolar. He's internalized what his family has kept repeating, that he is just like Monica, and looking at her living like this, believing that she is living well, is terrifying to him.
So he goes home, believing that he is just like his mother, and he's doomed to be a piece of shit. He goes back, and he breaks up with Mickey. Because he doesn't think that people like him can be happy, and he doesn't think he'll be okay. And that isn't something that Mickey can change. Too much is wrong with him, and Mickey can't do anything about it.
Really, it's just a matter of Ian operating under the "if you love them, let them go" mindset, and Mickey interpreting it as a rejection. It's the two of them both believing they are not good enough for the other and internalizing it instead of properly communicating.
TL;DR: Ian's breakup with Mickey in S5E12 is not done in a healthy OR selfish mindset. To him, he will do nothing but drag Mickey down, and in his unmedicated and clearly altered state of mind, he thinks the best thing is to let him go.
Season Six: Dating Caleb and Other Blasphemy
The first time we see Mickey in season six, it's behind a pane of glass in an orange jumpsuit.
Mickey had tried to murder Sammi, Ian's half-sister, and had been sentenced to prison for 15 years. It's established that Ian has not been to visit Mickey much and is trying to move on past that time in his life. But, upon being bribed by Svetlana, Ian visits, and during this visit Mickey asks Ian a question:
"You gonna wait for me?" - Mickey to Ian, S6E1.
And when Ian shows hesitation:
"Fuckin' lie if you have to, man, eight years is a long time." - Mickey to Ian, S6E1.
So, Ian replies:
"Yeah. Yeah, Mick, I'll wait." - Ian to Mickey, S6E1.
Before even meeting Caleb, fans absolutely tear into Ian for his decision to not commit to Mickey in this moment. They call it selfish, or out of character, or unfair to ice Mickey out when he is going through this difficult time.
But, let's look at it from Ian's position.
Ian has dealt with abandonment issues his entire life, with both Monica and Frank being unstable and infrequent providers during his adolescence. Throughout his relationship with Mickey, they had been separated on three separate occasions, one of which was entirely voluntary on Mickey's part. Now, due to committing a major crime, Mickey has been sent away for up to fifteen years. They would both be in their thirties by the time Mickey would be released, or close to it if he got out early, and that's not even considering that he was actively taking part in jobs / activities that could extend his sentence, like stabbing people.
Ian has dealt with recurring disappointment and abandonment his entire life, and throughout their time together, Mickey hasn't really established himself as stable.
Now, before you bring out the pitchforks;
"But Mickey was there for Ian and supported him through seasons 4-5. He grew as a person and proved he IS reliable."
Yes, that's true. He did undergo massive development that allowed him to be a better partner and more reliable person to Ian. But, canonically that period of time only takes place over a few months.
Mickey, for the better part of 2-3 years, was NOT a good partner to Ian. Multiple years of an unsteady situationship is not so easily forgotten. Yes, Mickey 1000% had valid reasons for acting the way he did. It's made very clear in S3E6 and S4E11 why Mickey hides his sexuality and lashes out when forced to confront it. But that isn't an excuse. His reasons for acting in a negative way towards Ian the first three seasons is understandable, but he went about it in a bad way.
Not to mention that, despite his growth, Mickey has just been sent to PRISON. No matter how you spin it, his decision to go after Sammi was NOT justified and does not necessarily bring forth confidence in his reliability and stability.
It's not unreasonable for Ian to not want to wait for over a decade for a man who has not always been the best for him. It sucks as a viewer who is invested in them, but Ian was not in the wrong.
Beyond (justifiably) selfish reasons, Ian also already thought that he was bad for Mickey, was worried that he would ruin his life, and with Mickey's justification for his torture attempt being that he did it FOR Ian, that Sammi had it coming because of what she did TO Ian, Ian probably felt responsible for that as well. There was probably a level of guilt in Ian from the whole situation, both for Mickey being in prison and for leaving him there.
But from his point of view, it's better for everybody to try and move on.
What really bothers me about this criticism toward Ian is the sense that he OWED Mickey his time and loyalty. Because Mickey had given and sacrificed so much for Ian during seasons 4-5, it's like people think Ian is then obligated to return that for Mickey, no matter what Mickey did. It's a very transactional way to view the situation, and it just leaves me with an icky taste in my mouth. Nobody owes anybody anything in that situation. Ian does not owe Mickey companionship, and Mickey did not owe Ian support when he got put in prison in season 9. Returning to Ian was Mickey's decision to make, and not a decision Ian was obligated to make in season 6.
Now, onto the actual "dating other people" part of the conversation.
For months, Ian has done nothing but get his meds on track while working at Patsy's, then at the janitors job on Lip's campus. During this time, Ian expresses having a very low sense of self-worth.
"He as smart as you?"
"No."
"Yeah, he's smart."
"Lip is the genuis of the family."
"So that gives you an excuse for not finishing [high school]? You seem plenty smart, and Dav's uniform doesn't really suit you."
- Ian, Lip, and Professor Youens, S6E3
And:
"This is it for me, Lip. This job. This is where I land."
- Ian to Lip, S6E3
Which Lip comments on in a very concise way:
"Yknow, he thinks... Being bipolar means he's doomed to be a piece of shit like our mother."
- Lip about Ian, S6E3
Ian feels no sense of purpose during these months. He feels he has no worth and that he is doomed to work a dead-end job and have no happiness. He thinks he is just like Monica.
That only changes when he witnesses an accident on the highway, and he saves a woman's life by pulling her out of a burning car.
This leads us to Caleb.
Now I'll admit, this is where I take issue with the storytelling, because this would've been a PERFECT way to segue into Ian's EMT arc, but regardless of what I personally think would've been better, the way it plays out in canon does actually still make sense for Ian's character.
After saving the woman from the burning car, Ian collapses due to smoke inhalation and exhaustion. A firefighter on the scene provides Ian with oxygen, thus saving his life. Ian immediately fixates on this particular firefighter.
Now, Ian has a very complicated relationship with feeling his emotions post his diagnosis. In season five, when he is numbed by his meds, the only way for him to feel again is through pain, via self-harm or starting physical fights, and sex. In fact, sex plays a major part in many aspects of Ian's life.
From the age of fifteen, Ian had been consistently subject to sexual abuse. He's been used for his body by countless men throughout his teenage years and has been oftentimes reduced merely to his sexuality and what he can provide to his partner. Even Mickey, in season 2, tells Ian as such in a panicked rage.
"You think we're boyfriend and girlfriend here? You're nothing but a warm mouth to me."
- Mickey to Ian, S2E8.
(No, I'm not saying Mickey sexually abused Ian. But he did contribute to the way we see Ian default so heavily to objectifying and sexualizing himself.)
So, due to this recurring trauma, Ian has a tendency to default to sex as the primary way of getting satisfaction, be it emotional or physical.
So, when Ian gets a rush of adrenaline from the crash, after months of that numbness, he chases the emotions in the most effective way he knows how.
Ian goes to the firehouse with cookies to give as thanks to the firefighter who saved him, but with a clear ulterior motive of getting laid. When he finds out that the particular firefighter (who happens to be part of the "gay shift" which is an odd writing choice) he saw on the highway is married, Ian meets Caleb. In this scene, they speak all of one line to each other when Caleb invites Ian to a firehouse softball game. The next time we see them on screen together, Ian acts very flirtatious toward Caleb, which sets forth their relationship.
"You ever pitch?"
"... Usually, but I'm open depending on what you're into. Where we doing this?"
"Follow me."
[...]
"Wait, we're actually playing softball?"
- Ian and Caleb, S6E5
I think Ian receives hate for this simply because he's expressing interest in a guy that isn't Mickey. Fans get the impression that Ian is moving on too fast or that his interest in Caleb is sudden or rushed. However, I think the rushed nature actually works to show Ian's intentions. In this moment, Ian is not really looking for a full-on relationship. Given how little they interacted thus far, the fact that Caleb wasn't even who Ian was originally interested in, and how Ian's comments consistently err on the side of sexual, its safe to say Ian was just looking for a hookup. In fact, it's Caleb who pushes so hard FOR the relationship.
Mickey, in a deleted scene, hooks up with an inmate right after talking with Ian. If Ian's relationship with Caleb had only been a fling or hookup, I don't think Ian would've been as heavily criticized. As it is, fans get upset at this relationship because it IS a relationship. They go on dates, Ian starts staying with Caleb, and really they seem to be very domestic.
But I don't think Ian was as dedicated to the relationship with Caleb as fans make him out to be.
From the jump, Ian seems uncomfortable with the quick-moving pace of it. At first he only seems interested in sex with Caleb, but upon the negative reaction that provokes, Ian conceded to going on a date with Caleb (which is a bit of a slap in the face to Mickey fans after Gallavich's ruined date.)
"[...] I was hoping to get my hands on your hose."
"Is that what this is to you? A fuck?"
"You say it like it's a bad thing. Come on, let's get out of here."
"No. I knew you were younger than me, but I thought you were a grown-up."
"Fuck. Okay. Okay. Hey, I'm into you, alright? I thought you were into me."
"I am."
"Then what's the problem?"
"I don't stick my dick in just any guy."
"What do you want, then?"
"Seriously? Do I have to spell it out for you?"
"Yeah."
"A date."
"With, like, flowers and chocolate and shit?"
"No, we could skip the flowers."
"Okay. You're on."
- Ian and Caleb, S6E5
(Side note, pulling a "is that all this is to you" after two non-romantic interactions is not just quick in terms of hookup culture, which Ian is more attuned to, but is quick in any terms. More on that later.)
During this date, Ian is visibly very uncomfortable. Some would chalk this up to him having never been on a date before, and the writing even seems to imply that,
"Okay, look, I have no idea what I'm doing. My last boyfriend wasn't much of a talker, his idea of a conversation was to insult me a bunch and then punch me right before we banged."
- Ian to Caleb, S6E6
but that's actually not true, DESPITE the writers forgetting that.
"You know, Mickey and I never went out on dates. Ned never took me out, Kash and I fucked in the back of a convenience store, and I don't think jerking off strangers in a nightclub counts, so..."
- Ian to Lip, S6E6.
He actually HAD gone out on a "date" with Ned in season three, where he was visibly less uncomfortable than on his date with Caleb. He also went to many loft parties during his time dancing at the club, wherein he blended in very well and was able to sorta chameleon himself with the northside crowd. I think the show wants us to believe his discomfort is from him "never having been on a date before" or being unfamiliar with a "slower" pace, but I think his discomfort actually would stem from him just genuinely not being interested in Caleb in a romantic way, and thus feeling awkward on a date that's in a more romantic setting (compared to his one with Ned, which was undoubtedly more sexual.)
I also think his discomfort stems from being completely out of his element. Ian has taken a massive hit to his confidence since his diagnosis, so his Southside roots bring about a bit more hesitancy in him than it might have before, and he may be less confident in his ability to chameleon. That's why, during the date, Ian shows discomfort with Caleb when he shows more "class" than Ian.
"Usually, I get a bunch of apps to share. You good with that?"
"[Uncertain hum] ... Appetizers! Sure, yeah, big- big fan of apps."
[...]
"You seem like a very pensive kinda guy. You an only child?"
"Uh, no."
"Brothers and sisters?"
"A bunch, yeah."
"Older or younger?"
"Both."
"What about your parents? Both still alive?"
"... Yeah."
"... Fantastic. I'm learning so much."
[...]
"Where I'm from, people communicate with their fists."
"Where's that?"
"Southside."
"Mmm. Hands of steel. Okay, so you're a street rat. A brawler."
"Is that a problem?"
"Only if you make it one."
- Ian and Caleb, S6E6.
Then, beyond their first date, we have the actual relationship to dive into.
Throughout his scenes with Caleb, Ian seems to oscillate between neutrality, discomfort, or mild enjoyment in the situations he finds himself in.
There's this interaction, for example, where Ian lets Caleb take charge in defining their relationship:
"So what are we doing?"
"Whatever you want, I guess."
- Ian and Caleb, S6E7.
Or this moment:
"What are you smiling at?"
"I like having you over here. What are you smiling at?"
"I like having a purpose."
- Ian and Caleb, S6E8.
Or when Caleb invites Ian out with his friends, and we see Ian slip into his chameleon persona, mirroring the petty mannerisms of the most vocal participant of the conversation, as well as avoiding diving too much into his personal history.
"You haven't told me which one is your ex."
"Guess."
"Old guy, pink sweater."
"How'd you know?"
"Ooh, a redhead, Caleb? Does his carpet match his drapes?"
"You're a good sport."
- Ian and Caleb, S6E8.
[...]
"If we had known you were bringing a middle school student, Caleb, we wouldn't have come to a place that cards."
"Oh, no, it's cool, I don't drink. I hear it makes your skin old and leathery."
"That's-that's how we're playing this?"
"Hey, you threw down first."
"Where you from, kid?"
"Back of the Yards."
"Local boy. What's your story?"
"Story?"
"Who you are, what you do, how did you meet this chocolate bundt cake?"
"Met him at the firehouse."
- Ian and Gregory, S6E8
[...]
"We like this one, Caleb. Don't we, Gregory?"
"I mean, If young, beautiful, and kind of a smartass is something to like, sure, fine, I guess we do."
- Caleb's friends about Ian, S6E8.
OR, in a deleted scene where Caleb expresses frustration at Ian keeping the distance between him and Ian's family, as well as Ian's lack of communication, while Ian seems unbothered or even perplexed by Caleb's frustration.
"So, where'd you sleep last night?"
"Home. Got done at three, told you I'd be late."
"Yeah, like nighttime late, not next day late."
"Well, I didn't wanna wake you, and I had to go back there to grab some stuff: clothes, towels..."
"Where's there?"
"Home, you mean?"
"Yeah."
"Back of the Yards."
"Right. You did mention that once. I still don't know where it is or who I'd call if there was an emergency?"
"Uh... my brother, I guess? Or my sister."
"Brother or sister. Okay. I'll just track down Ian Gallagher's brother or sister on the internet."
"I'll... put their numbers in your phone."
"Great."
- Ian and Caleb, S6E11 deleted scene.
OR any of the follwing:
When they go to get Ian tested for STDs, he is visibly uncomfortable having Caleb in the room with him.
He is only comfortable revealing his bipolar disorder if it is done in exchange for another secret from Caleb.
He isn't very comfortable sharing his past, only references his previous relationship in a lighthearted manner, and he only reveals his sexual history upon feeling pressured to do so, which he purposefully presents in a callous way.
To me, the entirety of Ian and Caleb's relationship reads as Ian's desperation for validation through sex, which leads to him putting up with a relationship he isn't entirely comfortable in or commited to or ready for. To me, it seems like he's truly just looking for companionship in any way he can get it.
Out of everything, though, I think what really gets to fans most about this storyline is the constant comparison of Caleb to Mickey as a means of demonizing Mickey.
Throughout the entirety of Ian and Caleb's relationship, there is a constant comparison between the two relationships, seemingly with the intent of painting Mickey as a horrible partner.
When Ian tells Lip about his upcoming date with Caleb, he remarks that he never went on dates with Mickey, which comes off as an unnecessary jab.
During his date with Caleb, Ian talks about his lack of effective communication skills, which reflects negatively on Mickey, to the point Caleb brings forward the idea of domestic abuse.
During the wedding that Ian attends with Caleb, Ian mentions Mickey's marriage to Svetlana, and he uses a tone that comes off as belittling the situation and how difficult it was for Mickey.
There's this line, when Caleb asks Ian to kiss for the first time:
"Can I kiss you?"
"I thought kissing comes after you've had sex a bunch of times."
"Ian, kissing comes whenever you want it to. Even now."
- Ian and Caleb, S6E6.
Then, there's Mandy stating that Caleb was better than Mickey.
"A hot black fireman. Also an artist."
"Upgrade from my brother."
"I miss Mickey, but uh... This new guy's nice."
- Ian and Mandy, S6E9
These near constant comparisons to Mickey are frustrating to fans, because it can often feel like Ian, or even just the writers and the narrative, are trying to belittle Mickey's character and reduce him to a one-note toxic ex, which completely spits in the face of the development that he went through. THAT is what is most frustrating to fans.
Because it's true that Mickey was not always the best partner. In real life, Mickey would be a walking red flag, and Gallavich would be undeniably toxic. But that applies to EVERY SINGLE CHARACTER in Shameless. That is the entire point of the show. None of them are particularly good people. They all do shitty things, but they all have compelling reasons for doing it. That's why we can look at these characters and feel connected to them instead of just absolutely hating them.
It's a really odd writing choice for a show that focuses on morally gray characters, or the idea that nobody in the show is really a good person, to decide to play moral high ground in this particular instance, and have Ian suddenly turn his nose up at Mickey's behaviors.
But is this really how Ian feels?
Because, as established, Ian is VERY good at playing chameleon. He is good at shaping himself into whatever a partner wants him to be. He mirrors his partners mannerisms, beliefs, and attitudes.
And Caleb, for all that the story wants to make us believe he's better than Mickey, is actually not the best partner either. Not just for cheating on Ian in season seven and then gaslighting Ian about it; he shows some toxic behaviors in season six as well, including being lowkey judgmental about Ian's Southside roots.
Take, for example, Caleb implying that the Southside is trash, but that he can see the beauty in Ian despite being from the Southside:
"That's my latest. I love to find the treasure inside the trash. Trying to find the secret life in things. What it wants to be instead of what it is."
"Is that what you're doing with me?"
"Good question. Can I kiss you?"
- Ian and Caleb, S6E6
(Which, funnily enough, this line from Caleb goes pretty against the sentiment that Monica had in season five, of Ian finding somebody who loves Ian for who he already is, as Mickey did.)
Or, for another example, Caleb judging Ian pretty heavily during the softball game for being "not grown-up." Simply because Ian expresses sexual interest in him above romantic.
"Cmon, let's get out of here."
"No. I knew you were younger than me, but I thought you were a grown-up."
- Ian and Caleb, S6E5.
Which, as I pointed out before, is really strange behavior. Participating in hookup culture isn't something that Ian needs to be shamed over. There's a sentiment of "Hooking up is beneath me, it's immature," to Caleb's tone, which is unfair. Now, he has reasons for this, that being his experience with getting HIV from a hookup who lied to him, which draws a pretty interesting parallel to Ian.
"Don't worry, guy I did the scene with said he was clean."
"He didn't use a rubber? Are you out of your fucking mind?"
- Ian and Mickey, S5E5.
Vs.
"Guy in college. He lied to me."
- Caleb to Ian, S6E8.
(Which I actually find to be a very interesting plot point and is actually a pretty good scene.)
So, while Caleb was not wrong to put forth a boundary by not hooking up, he was wrong for acting as if IAN was the problem in the situation. Not to mention, his behavior at the game is very strange when taken into account how little they've interacted thus far. He had understandable reasons for his negative reaction, but he went about it the wrong way. Sounds familiar, doesn't it?
Anyways, I could talk about the relationship between Ian and Caleb more, but that's not what the point of this is.
The point I'm trying to make is that Caleb, however covertly, expresses a negative or biased view toward the Southside lifestyle. And Ian, being the type to mimic his partners, follows along in that.
Ian already fears that he is going to be left. He is afraid that showing Caleb who he really is and not being the idealized version of himself will lead to Caleb breaking up with him.
"I'm enjoying it while it lasts."
"You think he'll dump you?"
"Well, I've told him I'm bipolar, and my family's screwed up, and he took it pretty well. But it's one thing to hear it and another to live it, so... We shall see."
- Ian and Mandy, S6E9
So, he chameleons. He makes himself the treasure in the trash. He distances himself from the image of a brooding, Southside street rat.
Because, after so long of constant pain and numbness during and post his diagnosis, Caleb is the first good thing he's found.
"I haven't been this happy in a long time."
- Ian to Caleb, S6E8.
And really, everything that I just talked about doesn't matter when you think about it that way.
No matter how dedicated or invested Ian was in his relationship with Caleb, it still provided him with companionship and validation, which as we know, is something that Ian has an unhealthy dependence on to find self-worth.
And I don't think Ian was wrong in searching for that connection simply because that connection wasn't with Mickey. He could've been well and truly in love with Caleb, and he wouldn't deserve some of the hate he receives for his canon actions.
It's easy to look at Ian's relationship with Caleb and get frustrated because of all the time that was put into Ian and Mickey's relationship. But beyond the instinctual negative feeling that comes with seeing Ian with anybody other than Mickey, his relationships outside of Mickey deserve to be analyzed and observed for what they actually do for HIS character, and not just immediately cast aside as unnecessary or ooc.
So, to summarize:
Firstly, Ian wasn't selfish for not waiting 15 years for somebody in prison. Whether he was serious about Caleb or not, Ian was under no obligation to dedicate himself to Mickey. Ian did not owe Mickey anything simply because Mickey was there for Ian when shit got tough. If they had been together, sure, Ian would've been a lot shittier for leaving Mickey alone. But as it was, they were broken up, and even if they hadn't been, Ian would've had every right to not want to continue seeing Mickey after his decision to harm Sammi, just as Lip was justified in not wanting to be with Mandy anymore after she ran over Karen.
Secondly, Ian dating Caleb wasn't bad for his character. In fact, I think their relationship in season six was actually a very interesting way to progress Ian's character and get more insight into his mind and how he operates.
Thirdly, Ian and Caleb's relationship deserves to be analyzed for what it is, rather than what it isn't. Just because Ian is not with Mickey doesn't mean that he doesn't undergo some huge development in this season, both in and outside his relationship with Caleb. Furthermore, Ian entering a new relationship gives us the opportunity to see more sides of his character, and as such the relationship should be analyzed as it's own separate entity, and not just as a hurdle in the way of Gallavich.
Fourth, Ian was not just waiting to cast Mickey aside to jump on the next dick possible. I've seen this criticism before, and when looking at his actual arc at the beginning of S6 and analyzing his general character, that's just simply not true. Entering a new relationship is not equal to immediately disregarding Mickey.
TL;DR: The hate Ian gets from this season mainly stems from "Ian date somebody aside from Mickey, bad Ian" without any further thought behind why he enters the relationship and what the relationship actually means to him. There is no separation in the minds of fans between Ian and Mickey, and therefore, Ian having experiences and an identity outside of Mickey is negatively perceived.
Season Seven: Putting His Own Wellbeing First
This one will be less long winded than the previous one, because I have less to say on it, honestly.
During the entirety of Ian's bipolar arc, it is pretty clearly shown that to maintain mental wellness, Ian needs stability.
When Mickey shows up and asks Ian to run away with him to Mexico, that's threatening to uproot every amount of stability Ian has managed to secure the past two seasons of the show.
I honestly don't see as much hate directed toward Ian for his decision to leave Mickey at the border as I see for his previous decisions. I'd say the main thing I actually see directed toward this season is just that Ian's story is boring without Mickey in it. Mostly because he enters another new relationship with Trevor after his relationship with Caleb, which really just follows the cyclical Shameless cycle of, "Don't know what to do with a character? Give them a new love interest!" But because I talked about the judgement for non-Gallavich Ian relationships above, I don't particularly feel like doing a deep dive into the Ian and Trevor relationship in this meta.
What I want to talk about relates to the Mickey Mexico storyline, though, and that's the hate other characters recieve for trying to dissuade Ian from going.
After finding out that Mickey escaped from prison, Fiona and Ian have the following conversation:
"What are you doing up?"
"Couldn't sleep. You ever, uh, think about about what would've happened if you'd run off with Jimmy-Steve?"
"Lying sociopath Jimmy-Steve? My life would be a nonstop psycho-thriller. I definitely dodged a bullet with that one."
"What if nothing ever gives you that same thrill again? Still feel like you dodged a bullet?"
"I don't know. Probably. Where's this coming from?"
"Things have been weird between me and Trevor since Mickey got out."
"You mean since Mickey busted out of prison and has got half the Chicago Police Department circling the Southside looking for him."
"Can't get him out of my head. Just trying to stop myself from doing something I shouldn't."
"You turned your life around. Mickey would set a match to it. You've done really great without him, and I'm really fucking proud of you."
- Ian and Fiona, S7E10.
I've seen this conversation criticized many times because of how "unfairly" Mickey is treated in this scene. But I truly think that nothing said in this scene was wrong, and Fiona was 100% right.
In the past, Fiona has definitely shown a prejudice against the Milkovich family before. Specifically with Mandy, Fiona seems to look down upon her and disapproves of the relationship between her and Lip. This on its own is unfair treatment and is annoying to witness.
But in this particular case, absolutely nothing she is saying is wrong or biased simply because Mickey is a Milkovich.
People take the line, "Mickey would set a match to it," and compare it to his behavior in late Season 4 through season 5, where Mickey is taking care of Ian, and say that Fiona is being untruthful or hypocritical. If Mickey had never been sent to prison, or even if he had just been released legally, and Ian was simply thinking about cheating on Trevor and getting back with Mickey instead of running away with him, then the criticism toward Fiona would be more justified. But as it is, Mickey is a wanted fugitive, and Ian running away with him would make Ian a fugitive as well, and WOULD effectively set a match to the life Ian had spent the past two seasons working toward. He would be giving up a career he worked hard for and fought to have, he'd be living in stressful conditions on the run, he'd have no support system, and he would have less ease of access to his medication. Running with Mickey would have been the wrong decision for Ian's wellbeing, and honestly, Mickey should never have asked Ian to go with him.
I think that many people have rose colored glasses on when it comes to Gallavich, specifically with Mickey, and that makes it harder to view these moments unbiased. But, looking at it objectively, Mickey was so wrong for asking Ian to come with him to Mexico. He KNOWS that Ian needs stability with his bipolar diagnosis, and he KNOWS that this would be a stressful life he'd be forcing Ian into.
Simply put, he's acting selfishly in that moment. Having your own interests in mind is not always a bad thing, but in this specific case, Mickey would have thrown a huge wrench into Ian's life is Ian hadn't made decisions in HIS best interest.
Again, I have less to say on this as I did other subjects, because to me it feels much more cut and dry. Mickey was in the wrong here 100%, Fiona was not being wrongfully judgmental toward Mickey, and Ian was not in the wrong for not going with Mickey.
After so long of seeing them apart, it makes sense to want to see them together again. So when Ian, again, is the one making the decision to end their relationship, fans are going to lash out at him and those around him.
But it's important to put aside biases and allow your favorite character to be in the wrong occasionally. Mickey is not perfect, and criticism against him, both from characters in the show and fans, is not unfounded nor unjustified.
TL;DR: Mickey was wrong for asking Ian to uproot his life and run to Mexico, and calling that out isn't defamation of his character.
To End This Yap Session:
Ian is by no means a faultless character, and he is not exempt from criticism both inside and outside of his relationship with Mickey. However, I often feel that the criticism he faces is for the wrong reasons, and not much contemplation or exploration is done on him as much as it is for Mickey.
I love Mickey. He's an amazingly complex character, and his relationship with Ian is one of my favorite parts of the show. But in being a complex character, he is also an imperfect character.
I feel that many fans get very protective over their favorite characters, to the point that anything that goes against that character's interests is labeled as bad, and any criticism toward his character is disregarded immediately.
In this particular case of Gallavich, I feel that post season three, fans often see things from Mickey's point of view without looking at Ian's as much. This meta was simply to give my own thoughts on Ian's most "controversial" moments among fans. Obviously this is mostly condensed to season six and his relationship with Caleb, which I feel is the biggest example of jumping to conclusions and only seeing the surface level of his character.
However, I would like to acknowledge that Ian is also an insanely popular character in the Shameless fandom. While he is misunderstood in many instances, he is given much more sympathy and understanding than many other characters in the show, especially many of the female characters. This long-winded meta is only focused on the concerning tendency for fans to link Ian's identity to Mickey entirely without allowing him to be an individual, but a majority of the time he is still a beloved character who is treated favorably by fans. Compared to a character like Debbie, Ian sees much more support, and I feel that the energy I put toward this meta and trying to understand Ian should also be applied to (almost) EVERY character in the show.
Anyways feel free to leave thoughts.
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elisedonut · 1 day ago
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Every single time Penelope Clearwater is mentioned or is in a scene in Harry Potter
because there are not very many so it's easy to do
i will put under a read more so it doesn't take over the tag though
“The Slytherins always come up to breakfast from over there,” said Ron, nodding at the entrance to the dungeons. The words had barely left his mouth when a girl with long, curly hair emerged from the entrance.
“Excuse me,” said Ron, hurrying up to her. “We’ve forgotten the way to our common room.”
“I beg your pardon?” said the girl stiffly. “Our common room? I’m a Ravenclaw.”
She walked away, looking suspiciously back at them.
Madam Pomfrey was bending over a sixth-year girl with long, curly hair. Harry recognized her as the Ravenclaw they’d accidentally asked for directions to the Slytherin common room. And on the bed next to her was — “HermioneY’ Ron groaned.
“That’s two Gryffindors down, not counting a Gryffindor ghost, one Ravenclaw, and one Hufflepuff,” said the Weasley twins’ friend Lee Jordan, counting on his fingers. “Haven’t any of the teachers noticed that the Slytherins are all safe? Isn’t it obvious all this stuff’s coming from Slytherin? The Heir of Slytherin, the monster of Slytherin — why don’t they just chuck all the Slytherins out?” he roared, to nods and scattered applause.
Percy Weasley was sitting in a chair behind Lee, but for once he didn’t seem keen to make his views heard. He was looking pale and stunned.
“Percy’s in shock,” George told Harry quietly. “That Ravenclaw girl — Penelope Clearwater — she’s a prefect. I don’t think he thought the monster would dare attack a prefect.”
“The basilisk kills people by looking at them. But no one’s died — because no one looked it straight in the eye. Colin saw it through his camera. The basilisk burned up all the film inside it, but Colin just got Petrified. Justin ... Justin must’ve seen the basilisk through Nearly Headless Nick! Nick got the full blast of it, but he couldn’t die again ... and Hermione and that Ravenclaw prefect were found with a mirror next to them. Hermione had just realized the monster was a basilisk. I bet you anything she warned the first person she met to look around corners with a mirror first! And that girl pulled out her mirror — and — ”
“Ginny — what did you see Percy doing, that he didn’t want you to tell anyone?”
“Oh, that,” said Ginny, giggling. “Well — Percy’s got a girlfriend.”
Fred dropped a stack of books on George’s head. “What?”
“It’s that Ravenclaw prefect, Penelope Clearwater,” said Ginny. “That’s who he was writing to all last summer. He’s been meeting her all over the school in secret. I walked in on them kissing in an empty classroom one day. He was so upset when she was — you know — attacked. You won’t tease him, will you?” she added anxiously.
“The sooner we get on the train, the better,” he said. “At least I can get away from Percy at Hogwarts. Now he’s accusing me of dripping tea on his photo of Penelope Clearwater. You know,” Ron grimaced, “his girlfriend. She’s hidden her face under the frame because her nose has gone all blotchy. ...”
“Ah, there’s Penelope!” said Percy, smoothing his hair and going pink again. Ginny caught Harry’s eye, and they both turned away to hide their laughter as Percy strode over to a girl with long, curly hair, walking with his chest thrown out so that she couldn’t miss his shiny badge.
“Put it here, Harry,” he said, laying the broom in the middle of the table and carefully turning it so that its name faced upward. People from the Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff tables were soon coming over to look. Cedric Diggory came over to congratulate Harry on having acquired such a superb replacement for his Nimbus, and Percy’s Ravenclaw girlfriend, Penelope Clearwater, asked if she could actually hold the Firebolt.
“Now, now, Penny, no sabotage!” said Percy heartily as she examined the Firebolt closely “Penelope and I have got a bet on,” he told the team. “Ten Galleons on the outcome of the match!”
Penelope put the Firebolt down again, thanked Harry, and went back to her table.
“Harry — make sure you win,” said Percy, in an urgent whisper. “I haven’t got ten Galleons. Yes, I’m coming, Penny!” And he bustled off to join her in a piece of toast.
“Well done, Harry!” said Percy, looking delighted. “Ten Galleons to me! Must find Penelope, excuse me — ”
Percy Weasley, meanwhile, had much to say on the subject of Sirius’s escape.
“If I manage to get into the Ministry, I’ll have a lot of proposals to make about Magical Law Enforcement!” he told the only person who would listen — his girlfriend, Penelope.
“Oh, I’m not going to bite just yet. We’ll see if she’s a bit quicker at remembering her name than Barny. Who are you, girly?”
“Penelope Clearwater,” said Hermione. She sounded terrified, but convincing.
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scintillyyy · 2 days ago
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i wonder how many things in the 90s were AGAINST "tough on crime" thoughts
one of the ONLY examples i can think of is the original milestone comics and that's probably due to milestone being built by minorities
yea tbh you're probably not going to find a ton unless you look more at minority-led publishers or indie comics. which is why i get a little. like i know it doesn't seem this way but i actually am not thrilled to be defending dixon at all but i do think that at least half the accusations thrown at him need to be examined within a historical context and cultural norms of the period because the answer is not necessarily and only "because dixon is a conservative" or taking the base assumption that dixon is solely at fault for everything ever (especially when the directions he took characters was given approval by the batoffice and dennis o'neil and i love dennis o'neil as a editor but a lot of writers and editors of the era get off scott free by placing the blame solely on dixon). and i'm not even necessarily defending the cultural norms of the time, but like. i always point to the tim rages against marijuana issue that is like "man dixon is weird about drugs" only to look a the cover and realize tim's little DARE speech was actually written by alan grant! no man's land itself too was actually 80% written by people who were not dixon (including o'neil, rucka, grayson who consider themselves quite liberal) and dixon really only contributed to robin and nightwing on the event (and a YJ one shot) and gave an interview that said he didn't actually like quite a few things about NML and thought some of those events stretched plausibility too much. and yet he gets held accountable for being solely resposible for almost every single thing in 90s batcomics that is deemed conservative by today's standards when in fact he was working in a collaborative office that represented a multitude of differing viewpoints that came to an agreement on many storylines. ppl like to attribute a lot of personal power to dixon especially in his earliest years when he was probably at his most limited by and guided by bat-editorial (you can see in his later years following dennis o'neil leaving the helm where he starts to become even more overt and less leashed when it comes to things like tim's boarding school era). and not that he's not at fault or hands clean here--the man is at fault for and rightly taken to task for a lot and should continue to be done so. but i do wish people would also consider other factors at play. and acknowledge that he was not doing anything that didn't have at least a little approval and agreement from higher ups on how they wanted characters to grow and change.
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btower3689 · 1 day ago
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Rebloging from this account because they blocked me on my other one after the whole magic with a k thing.
I wasn’t going to speak on this post bc my last couple posts cover most of this but I just can’t help it at this point.
@crazycatsiren I'm realizing you have a lot of bad opinions about stuff in general.
What is a demon? It depends greatly on which culture you're referencing, but in general, a demon describes any spirit that is not considered to be a part of the abrahamic God's influence, or in other words, spirits with free agency that are not heavenly angels. If you are an Abrahamic monotheist, every other God/Goddess or spirit from every other religion is a demon. This means all of the Egyptian, Greek, Norse deities would theologically be demons according to an Abrahamic theology.
My problem with this take is the apparent misunderstanding of what the Goetic and other demons actually are. You seem to not be aware that many (actually most) of these demons are the Gods and Goddesses of other religions around the world. When followers of the God of Abraham (Christians, Jews, Catholics, Muslims) observed the pagan religions of the people around them, they saw them as evil, therefore, they demonized their deities and recorded them as such. Astarte/Aphrodite became Astaroth, Cerberus became Naberius, Phosphorus became Lucifer, and we can go on forever.
If you think demons cannot be contacted through divination tools, you're also saying that you don't think any spirit/God or Goddess except for Yahweh can be reached with divination tools, which is a sentence that doesn't make sense because Yahweh is strictly against witchcraft and the only way to reach him is through prayer. If I can reach out to Aphrodite or Astarte with a pendulum, then I can reach out to Astaroth with a pendulum. If I can reach out to Venus, then I can reach out to Lucifer. Implying that I can’t only reflects a misunderstanding of what these energies are in general.
Now I'm going to ask you a question that might require a bit of critical thinking skills.
Do you think a spirit is going to be kind towards a person who believes it is evil? Do you think a demon like Asmoday is going to present himself honestly to a Christian who believes he should be warded off and destroyed? Do you think a demon like Paimon is going to act the same towards a practicing Muslim as he is a practicing demonolater? Do you think Yahweh or Allah is going to approach me, a devotee of Lucifer, in the same way he approaches his own followers?
You make the assumption that these spirits act the same towards every person, and that, just because one culture described them a certain way, we must take that account as the definitive truth. Of course a Christian isn't going to tell you that Satan is kind or compassionate. Of course a practicing Jew isn't going to tell you that Lilith is patient. It would be a direct violation of their theological laws.
However, if I go to a Hellenic pagan and ask if Aphrodite is evil, they'd obviously say no. If I go to a Christian magi and ask if Astaroth is evil, they'll obviously say yes.
No recording of any spirit to have ever been witnessed has been created without bias and perspective. The classification of demons were written by right handed practitioners who believed in the "one true" God. Usually white people demonizing the pagan practices of racialized people.
The incredible irony in your condescending statement is that those "demons" you think are bad, because white people told you they are, are actually usually the Gods and Goddesses of those people of color you love to talk over. The cults that have followed these deities over centuries and have continued to exist despite the best efforts of colonial powers, are not just ditsy white people. You call them that because it makes you feel superior, but it only exposes how well colonial propaganda has worked on you. This is literally the exact same argument those chrisofasciests you claim to hate so much have used to systematically wipe out pagan cults all over the world. By parroting their ideology you only align yourself with them.
(and as a black witch myself, can we please stop with the "I hate white pagans" bullshit?? "you're all white and stupid so that means you have no culture and don't know anything!" Like can we please stop, it makes us look so immature and gives witches of color a bad reputation. Hellenic and Norse pagans are white and I gain so much valuable wisdom from them to use in my own craft all the time. White pagans are not the problem, uneducated people spewing nonsense certainly is one of them though)
Infernals are infernals for a reason. I agree that you're going to be in for a bad time if you assume that Lucifer or Belial are just nice cutesy spirits that never do anything bad and were just misunderstood. Every demonolater is very aware that these very fringe deities represent dark, chaotic, and unfavourable aspects of existence.
But we're... witches. We're pagan. We're usually not all that concerned about adhering to purity culture and love and light shenanigans. When I reach out to the Lord of Darkness itself, I understand that he's probably not going to be very cheerful. You assuming that most demonolaters don't understand the demons they've devoted themselves to only tells me that you're speaking on a practice you do not understand as a complete outsider with absolutely no context.
Yes various cultures have spent a very long time warding these spirits out, but those specific cultures are also deeply religious and following a completely separate God. If I am not a follower of Yahweh then I am not going to do what his followers do.
You call yourself a daughter of Artemis but wield the same doctrine that has destroyed and demonized her cults? Do you forget yourself?
Saying "witches shouldn't work with Stolas because Christians told us he's evil" is just the most hilarious take to me. We also shouldn’t work with Artemis or Hekate because Christians told us they were bad. Christians told you witchcraft is evil too, yet here you are. You seem to forget yourself.
It's incredibly easy to simply not talk about things you're uneducated on. You'll save yourself a lot of embarrassment in the future.
It's absolutely fucking ridiculously hilarious when white pagans go around with "demons aren't evil they're all cool and harmless you can simply communicate with them using divination tools you'll be fine you can be friends with them Christians just love to fearmonger".
Meanwhile, just about every religion in the world be like, lmfao we got some news for y'all white people's children.
Your dumb white asses with your pendulums, moon water, and appropriated sage bundles ain't gonna stand a snowflake's chance in hell if you actually find yourself having to deal with an iota of the otherworldly shit my people have spent millenia coming up with ways to fend off while your colonizer ancestors were too busy calling us all superstitious fools and ignorant savages.
Sit the fuck down and STFU.
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dykedvonte · 2 months ago
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I hate the stretch lines in the front of Curly's uniform because that means the devs rushed to make a model in like a month or so and thought "They gotta at least know he has huge knockers, gotta know he's got back pain." Cause like what is the thematic importance of his tits having overhang?
What responsibility is that representing? Breast reduction? It shows an inherent greed in his character due to the excess and heshouldletmeholdone and that he clearly is blinded cause if he tries to look down his damn ladder all he's seeing is his own cleavage.
#this is my curly slander post ig#disclaimer i need you to understand i see all fictional men i like as like butches Curly is no exception#but like they didnt need to add that many polygons to his chest like its unnessary and honestly a little mean he already has so many things#to handle and you expect him to hold those boys up like that just aint right this is like something so stupid but i know you can tell im#having strong feelings about it cause like what was the point why did they survive the fucking crash it has to be a injoke at this point#with the devs it shouldnt make me this mad im turning into a misandrist but only towards large chested men#mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#shitpost#suggestive#ig because this is just about his chest but like also they made him objectively pretty for no reason like yeah like ideal man and work ig#but they went over the extra mile like i have a right to be mad they did that much for a model we see canonically for like two seconds its#crazy actually how little we see of curly pre crash because we also lose his physical movements to help characterize him the way we see#body language with the other characters and how it gives way to their struggles and personalities and sentiments in certain moments#like all he does and how he emotes is stifled by the fact we always play as him until the last moments where he takes over to try and save#the ship and crew and even right before that the scene is so wrought with tension we cant tell what that look he gave Jimmy meant due to#the limitations of the models and how stiff Curly is like was it fear acceptance denial we dont know enought about how he acts himself#to tell and then everything else is charaterized by what Jimmy had done to where we dont really just get to see Curly as himself like Anya#and Swansea and Daisuke we have no idea how theyd act in a regular moment outside of a few glimpses and even then it is them doing#their jobs like grrrr we hate an unreliable narrator but also its the fact jimmy clearly does not interact with them or try to outside of#his position as copilot and then captain harkening back to the entire capitlist view of utility and how he views all of them as useless eve#Curly which fandom tangent the fandom also tends to do to Curly as they base every trait on what they think he failed to do as Captain#between Jimmy and Anya when the QnAs kinda make him out to be a rather open and willing person but still someone who isnt like a push over#just thinking of QnA three where it mentions hes very open to trying new things and you need to be an open minded person to open urself up#to failure like that and ig this is just the weird view that Curly needs to learn that or that theres redemption he needs personality wise#verses healing and learning from trauma like idk its the idea that people assume he did abosultely nothing when the games points out direct#and throught parallels he was taking actions its just wasnt enough and an over focus on absolute inaction vs ineffective methods used to#tackle the issues and themes the game grapples with plus wanting someone to take the blame and have to make it up to Anya even tho#i think it would mean nothing from Curly because she saw his efforts and would be disappointed it wasnt enough but the idea she would#disregard the attempts or not acknoweldge Jimmy as the epicenter compared ot Curly is weird and too focused on someone
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icewindandboringhorror · 22 days ago
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I've referenced before how I have a big google document to keep track of every media I've ever seen in my entire life (just for reference because I like to track everything possible lol… I am the Data Collector), but recently as I was updating it, I thought of actually evaluating them to find out random percentages (like for example, out of Total Shows Watched, what percentage did I finish vs. stop watching, what percentage did I like or dislike, etc.)...
Evaluating these things is made easier by the fact that I already place everything on each subsection of the list into 6 broad ranking categories, so I don't have to go back and guess to figure out how I feel about them or anything. The categories are: Ranking 5 - overall best* (despite some criticisms of course because I'm too much of an Analyzer to ever find anything Perfect lol) Ranking 4 - more positive than neutral, but not good enough to be 5 Ranking 3 - either the good + bad negate each other, OR it's just not memorable/interesting in any way enough to be ranked higher or lower (this is the Default category ALL things are placed in if no other rank applies) Ranking 2 - maybe a few redeemable elements but largely more negatives than positives Ranking 1 - So bad that it circles around to being fascinating to observe in some way (not necessarily Funny, or Good, but just interesting somehow) Ranking 0 - Bad in a genuinely frustrating or obnoxious manner
*("best" primarily defined here as most interesting, rather than most good in a technical sense, or some other measure. I tend to value more highly whether there's something novel or thoughtful about the worldbuilding, tone, writing, base premise, etc - than about whether it's actually executed perfectly.)
And here's the amount of shows that have so far been placed into each category -
TV shows ~ Rank 5 (highest) - 20 shows ~ Rank 4 (mid-high) - 28 shows ~ Rank 3 (neutral/default/meh) - 114 shows ~ Rank 2 (mid low) -33 shows ~ Rank 1 (low low but intriguingly so) - 14 shows ~ Rank 0 (iredeemably low) - 2 shows
This would make for a total of 211 TV shows overall. However, there are 57 shows within these list marked as "didn't finish" (typically meaning I quit on the very first or second episode - but log them still to keep a record that I at least had a brief view of them).
So my total of genuinely fully watched shows would be more 154. 211 Total, but a More Accurate Total of 154.
Counting them all and using the Total Number Of The List (211) -- that means roughly 9.5% of all total shows I have ever watched (or at least attempted to watch) have been Mostly Good, 13% have been Moderately Okay, 54% have been either entirely Forgettable or some mix of good + bad that lands them right in the Neutral Middle, 15.6% have been Mostly Bad, 6.6% have been Bad (but in an interesting way), and 0.9% have been Terribly Bad.
Additionally, I didn't even get past the first two episodes of about 27% of the total.
Sooo, discounting ones I didn't finish, my total TV shows ever watched in my life would be about 154 (maybe give or take a few, assuming I might have forgotten some from very long ago).
But instead of entire life, let's just say this is the total for 'About 20 Years' (so, not counting very early childhood when I likely wouldn't remember things I saw/have no detailed recollection of them (like for example, I'm sure at some point when I was like 4yrs old I must have seen an episode of Spongebob or something, but I have zero distinct memories of it, can't quote anything of it, and barely recall the premise - so I don't count it on the list, etc.)).
In that case, 154 divided by 20 would be roughly 7.7 shows a year.
Which is actually surprisingly low considering that I often have stuff on in the background for hours whilst I make sculptures and do costumes and stuff (maybe I should have also marked some distinction between 'things I fully paid attention to' and 'things I kind of half listened to whilst sculpting', but that would further split the categories too much probably lol), but I guess a lot of that is youtube videos or random documentaries, so .. eh.. maybe I get it being lower.
Now, doing the same thing for movies-
Movies ~ Rank 5 (highest) - 4 movies (3.4% of total) ~ Rank 4 (mid-high) - 12 movies (10.3% of total) ~ Rank 3 (neutral/default/meh) - 91 movies (78.4% of total) ~ Rank 2 (mid low) - 8 movies (6.8% of total) ~ Rank 1 (low but interesting) - 1 movie (0.8% of total) ~ Rank 0 (irredeemably low) - none in this category (0%)
That makes 116 for a Total (Actually Remembered) Movies Watched In Lifetime (Or At Least In 20 Years).
116 divided by 20 is roughly 5 or 6 movies a year (I feel this has probably been skewed though by adding everything since like elementary school onwards, as I remember a lot more movies from child/teen years.. Whereas, the past 3 years I feel like I've barely seen maybe even 5 movies?? lol). I also have "Didn't Finish" marked on 18 of them. Which means I quit halfway through about 15% of the total movies.
So, a for broader summary stuff..
I seem to be less forgiving to movies than tv shows, by far. Which makes sense to me, I guess, because I love elaboration and details, so "short form" things that only last an hour or two are often lost on me a bit. My biggest complaint with movies is indeed usually walking away just wishing there had been more exposition, more scenes where characters are doing nothing, more "mindless bantering" conversations, more Quiet Downtime and Lore Elaboration and so on lol, so... of course most 1-2hr films end up feeling a bit Not Enough To Draw My Interest/Nothingy to me.
If you count 5 and 4 as "like" and rankings 2 to 0 as "dislike", then for TV shows I at least somewhat liked 48 of them, and at least somewhat disliked 47 of them.. So it's almost exactly the same lol. I'm just about equally as likely to find something bad as I am to find something redeeming about it. But overall, the largest chance is that I just won't really care much for it at all and it will be tossed into the 'neutral' pile, forgotten forever. Movies have a bit better of a balance, "liking" 16 of them, and "disliking" only 9 of them. So I'm slightly more likely to enjoy a movie than to find it annoying - though still VASTLY more likely to just not find it anything in particular, possibly not even finishing it.
ANYWAY.. this is vague and literally pointless, but like I said, I just really find information fun. Like my document where I've rated every apple flavor I've ever tried (like 40 of them now?), or reviewed every oreo flavor (32?), or ranking data from my entire 10 years of Trying To Make Friends process (out of 100 people, roughly 8% chance of a moderate compatibility, 3% chance of high), or etc. etc.. I love to have random pointless things to analyze I suppose lol.
I doubt anyone tracks things in their life in this same exact way, but I'd be interested in hearing any at least somewhat similar data !!! (like, how many TV shows you watch a year on average, and what percentage of those you like vs. dislike (if you keep track of that sort of thing), etc.)). I guess it might be easier with movies, since I think some people use those websites where you curate a list of movies you've seen and you can rate them or something, so maybe the numbers are already available on those places. :0
#maybe this is my version of spotify wrapped lol.. Lifetime Media Google Doc Wrapped.. kind of.. except I'm not going over specific titles.#I can't do this with music since I rarely EVER look for new music or add to my Youtube To MP3 folder library as I just don't really#listen to music that often. When I'm working (the majority of when I seek background noise) I need like.. people's talking voices#for some reason. Just instruments and singing are not distracting enough to me to work as background noise because theyre#almost TOO in the background if that makes sense? like if I put music on then I just tune it out and it's virtually no different#than if I were daydreaming stream of consciousness thoughts in an entirely quiet room lol. And I can't really do it with books since#essentially 100% of what I read is non-fiction. usually about some specific subject or academic topic OR stuff like#1800s magazines or cookbooks or historical people's diaries. Which is not really.. the type of thing I would#rank as easily I guess? like 'ooh yeah putting the sociology textbook in my top 5 hee hee right next to the 1920s radio recipes book' lol.#Then for games... I just sadly dont play enough of them. I've been banned from new games as I've told myself I cant play anyting#long form (no rpgs or etc) until I actually finish MY OWN game first - to keep me from wasting time. so on average#I play... 0 new games a year. ToT... I do play the sims sometimes but that's really all (which is not a new game at all since#I've been playing it on and off for years). Thus I guess movies/TV are really the only things that make sense#to collect this sort of information on. I could do youtube videos I guess also but that seems kind of strange like...#giving a rating to every single video I watch in a ranked list lol.. Especially since I would say a good 85% of the time#they are exclusively background noise whilst I'm working on something or cleaning the house or etc. and not things I pay serious attention#to. There are only a few specific topics/types/creators of videos I watch where I'm ACTUALLY sitting in front of a screen paying#direct attention to the content (usually when it's educational or political things). Everything else is too mindless to even rank.#ANYWAY... ever analyzing my little hermit Weird Relationship To Media (in the sense of seemingly not processing or getting the same#things out of it as many other seem to). I think that can contribute sometimes to the whole difficulty socializing and stuff#since our culture is very centered around media consumption generally speaking. People want to talk about The New Movie that came#out or The Big TV Show Of The Year. and for me it's like.. highly likely I just plain have NOT seen it. Or if i have. statistically#I most likely was entirely ambivalent if not slightly negative towards it lol. Which just kind of takes the steam out of a 'fun' 'casual'#conversation and you seem like a bit of a bummer if most of your only feedback is either 'idk what that is' or 'oh yea... i did#see that one.... i didnt like it all that much though... I think it'd be better with elves in it.. and 7 hours longer..'' lol..#Which I am not disliking things in a 'grr i hate it bc its popular'/just to be contrarian way. I actually dislike that mindset/find it#silly (by striving so hard to be counterculture you are thus still defining yourself by the whims of external culture - just in the#opposite direction. but are still just as preoccupied with the mainstream (going against it) as everyone else. etc. lol..)) In my#case I think it IS just having niche hyperspecific tastes.. for example- it peeves me when cell phones are in media bc I dont want to be#reminded at ALL of the real world. so.. cross off anything set in modern times. so on & etc. Judging all things by these weird criteria lol
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martyrbat · 7 months ago
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habeas corpus – detective comics #1086
(ID in alt!)
#loved this back up feature so much and seeing that bruce timm shit made me annoyed enough to actually transcribe it#first the way hes depicted as having to stand trial and ARGUE and fight for the rights of using the coin#rather than it just being a compulsion and something he must do before a decision....#like every time. every time when he's 'leaving it up to chance'—thats a time when harvey won. thats a time when harvey fought for the right#to use the coin and make it at least a 50/50 chance instead of 'crawling away until the hard part is done' like two face pushed for#every single time. regardless of the results regardless of knowing theres only a halfway chance of it actually achieving anything#or lessening the damage two face can/will do. every time hes fighting for and still believing in a fair trial and that everyone deserves on#it isnt him being weak. it isnt him avoiding responsibility. its him fighting and forcing and pushing for it as hes internally at war#with himself 24/7. even when two face wins he doesnt give up & continues to fight for what he believes in despite the injustice done to him#the way he tells Judge Janus that it isnt about HIM (himself!) while defending the right of existence to the jury of other societal rejects#the way he gestures to himself only at the very end. he asks the judge does that sound like anyone he knows and janus replies in two faces#voice but harvey keeps going. he keeps fighting for others. but at the end in actually acknowledging two face being part of him#(and by extension harvey being part of two face) and how harvey is fighting just as much to have a place as two face is#(but more within his own mind & upholding his belief system still despite knowing how it continues to fail them) and just FUCK#and two faces snaps! how theres no jurisprudence system above there either ! just no one will admit it!#how harvey knows!!! look what happened to him when he was doing the right thing!#look how many criminals and mob bosses paid their way out! look how the police are corrupt!#but still believing in it and how a system has to be in place despite being a direct victim of it as well and just GOD#I LOVE YOU GOOD HEARTED AND WANTING TO HELP PEOPLE HARVEY DENT YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS TO ME !!!!!!!!#taking away how he genuinely wanted to help people and bring wrongs to rights takes away literally everything hes built on#it takes away the entire fucking tragedy of his character (and in many ways it changes how bruce himself operates and believes because#harvey WAS a good man doing everything by the books. he was trying to bring justice in the 'right way' and believed in the system. he was#what people tell bruce he should be and look where it got him. look how the system failed 'even the good ones' because the system itself is#corrupt. it isnt flawed—it was operated to oppress and thats why it cant just be fixed but must be entirely rebuilt and why bruce must#operate outside of it. it also gives more depth because harvey is one of batmans first and biggest failures. he didnt protect him.#he didnt save his parents as a helpless child (as bruce) but he couldn't save his parents as BATMAN.#it wasnt just random chance like his parents tragedy but this was calculated and something bruce didnt stop. its ALWAYS going to eat at#him if he could of prevented it by telling harvey his identity. by doing something different. by being more prepared or somehow#knowing it was going to happen. harvey is the face of tragedy in so many ways that cant fit in these messy rambly tags but its ALLL!!!!!!!#bc harv was (and still is despite it all! despite two face!) a good man!! because he originally was a glimmer of hope to bruce & the city!!
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apocalypticdemon · 5 months ago
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I am so beyond ready to quit this job. Wednesday cannot come fast enough.
#to be fair it's bc school starts again in a few weeks#but idk. every day at this office feels like sandpaper on my skin. people always ask me shit i dont understand#and every case is so individual there's no set checklist to follow to troubleshoot#so most of the time I just grind my gears and get stuck#it'd busy more days than not.#and it was advertised to me as data entry only. client interactions was not what i signed up for.#it's all client interaction.#we're short staffed so nobody gets to take the back office and have a break.#when we weren't short staffed i was the new guy and only got 1 day in the back a week while everyone else got 2.#all my coworkers are conservative but talk like they're apolitical.#i thought it'd be fulfilling bc im helping people get benefits#but many are rude or impatient as any other service job. I'm constantly trying to direct people that don't want to listen#or explain the intricacies of something i barely understand.#and i don't want to lead people astray bc you have to start over if you blow a deadline.#but there's just nothing redeeming that i enjoy.#i hate customer service. i hate constantly asking questions. i like seldom few of my coworkers.#i can't be me at work.#and i don't care about the work itself anymore.#this job made me cry every day for weeks last month from sheer stress and overstimulation.#i almost cried myself sick several times.#the only reason I'm not there anymore is bc i dont fucking care anymore.#it took me 2 months to burn out. 2 months!#i was training for half of that!!#idk. everyone decided i was smart and could pick it up quickly so. even though everyone else got 4-6 weeks of shadowing#you can make do with 3 before you start doing stuff solo.#which feels unfair. i wasn't ready for it. and i resent the decision quite a bit.#plus it's been a nightmare for me in terms of external stressors and my generally deteriorating mental health. so.#all in all. i hate it here.#and i can't wait to turn in my notice so i can gtfo in 2 weeks#i am so tired. free me. let me go back to my music please
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turtlespancake · 6 months ago
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me when i write a character who is prone to dooming themself and then they run off and doom themself. core traits are stubbornness and a willingness to disregard their own humanity gET BACK HERE IM NOT DONE WITH YOU
#rambling#surprisingly this is not about jakob.. im just really consistent about my favorite character archetypes 😭😭#WARNING THE NOTES ON THIS ARE REALLY LONG I STARTED RAMBLING#“ouhh i have a headache i'll just lie down and rotate my blorbos in no general direction for a while until it goes away” and then boom.#serious plot considerations. 2 questions answered 24million new questions raised. this is specifically Not what i asked for.#so now im sitting here STILL dizzy running mental calculations on how i can get this bitch out of peril without reworking everything#but they literally keep dying in every timeline 😭😭 every single plausible road leads to them running off and screwing themself over#“character who doesn't realize they want to live until it's way too late to look back” VS#“character who is forced to live and handle the things they never though they'd survive long enough to deal with” FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT.#fucking hell i have never had this much trouble writing a character as i have with them#they genuinely do just run off and do shit without my permission and then i have to pace for an hour or two wondering#“ok they wOULD do that. but should they. do i feel like i can confidently write that.”#im like constantly in this tug of war trying to get them to CHILL#but also they are absolutely my favorite character from the entire project. but like. FUCK GET BACK HERE#is death the most satisfying end to this arc? is someone who was Set on dying then NOT dying the most satisfying end to the arc?#how many bridges can you burn until you irreparably set yourself aflame too?#would ghost or revival plotline work?? would it make sense with the worldbuilding??#do i just Like Them enough to want them to not die?? where do i draw the line between personal bias and a good arc?#is death not feeling as impactful as survival solely because i've been writing for so long that it's lost the initial impact?#and other such plot considerations...#im gonna have such an easy time writing another character though 😭😭 because THAT character's dynamic in the second act#is to stare at character 1 and be like “why are you like this. i mean i know Why but can you chill. please.” and like damn bro me too#actually wait no i think kaey.a is the hardest character i've ever written i take it back#had to worry about his 20million facades AND his Actual feelings AND canon compliance. shit is hard#i still havent finished the k/aeya fic i started back when the chasm first released which is uhh. two years ago. oops.#i think i struggle writing emotionally repressed liars i think thats what this is 😭😭 anyways.#(voice of guy who has been obsessed with nonlinear narratives and tragedies for several years):#“is it too much to kill this character in a nonlinear exploration game with tragic elements”#like bitch what are you talking about 😭😭 YOU'RE the target audience here figure it out#sorry the notes on this are just my writing journal now apparently
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