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#then some random new artist that started drawing a week ago can get more likes on their first post than you got in 10 years combined
alchemiclee · 11 months
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the best advice for how to become a good and well known and loved artist online: be lucky. nothing you do matters if you dont have luck and break out by chance 🤠
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yamujiburo · 1 year
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✨YAMUJIBURO F.A.Q.✨
Should've made this a while ago! I'm starting to get a lot of the same questions in my inbox nowadays tho and I feel bad for clogging up y'all's timelines with the same questions haha
GENERAL QUESTIONS
Who are you?
I'm Kiana, I'm a queer, Japanese Jamaican woman, and a Director/Storyboard artist at Disney Television Animation.
What are your pronouns
I usually go by she/her but I don't really mind any pronouns~
Where did you go to school?
California College of the Arts (but I dropped out when I was hired at Disney)
How did you get hired at Disney?
My bosses found me on twitter through my Team Rocket fanart. They liked my drawing style and asked if I wanted to take a storyboard test. I did, I passed, I got interviewed and moved to LA two weeks later to start storyboarding.
Is this a repost blog??
No, you might know be better as @kianamaiart. This is just my Pokémon sideblog where I post exclusively (for the most part) Team Rocket and Pokémon art.
What does your username mean?
It's a combination of the main 4 Team Rocket members' Japanese names: Yamato (cassidy), Musashi (jessie), Kojiro (james), Kosaburo (butch)
What program and brush do you use to draw?
Default brush in Storyboard pro
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GENERAL POKEMON QUESTIONS
Who's your favorite Pokémon?
What are your favorite ships?
Any ship with Jessie. Yamushipping, Rocketshipping and Hanamusashipping are my top three!
Who do you ship Ash with?
I was a big Pokéshipper when I was younger but nowadays don't really feel strongly about any of the ships involving the kid characters. I'm also in the "Ash is aroace" camp.
Do you have any trans headcanons?
You can find em here along with other headcanons! It should be noted that I don't usually marry myself to one hc (unless it's for a specific AU I'm trying to build out) and love seeing various interpretations of a character! Trans woman Jessie, Trans woman James, Trans man James, Genderfluid Jessie, give em to me!
Do you play the games?
I've played all the mainline Pokémon games and very much enjoy them! But I am much more invested in the anime and the characters in the anime.
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HANAMUSA AU QUESTIONS
Where can I read all the comics in order?
Here! I update anytime I make a new comic and list them in chronological order (since I just draw comics at random points in the timeline as they interest me). This post also already answers some of the frequently asked questions about this AU like: How did Jessie and Delia meet? What are James and Meowth up to? How old are Jessie and Delia? etc.
What does "Hanamusa" mean?
Hanamusa is a combination of Delia and Jessie's Japanese names, Hanako and Musashi respectively.
When does this AU take place?
It takes place sometime after the Mezase Pokémon Master/To Be a Pokémon Master series. So all the events that happened in the series, unless retconned within the series, happened. Ash is 10 at the start of the comics.
What's the status between Jessie, James, Meowth and Giovanni/Team Rocket?
Not great terms since they were fired, but also not the worst terms. Giovanni just let the three of them go without any further issues. I will say that I've always loved the theory that Giovanni keeps Jessie specifically around because of her parentage and he as a soft spot for her that he keeps a secret. I feel like Matori was the one that got the three of them fired and Giovanni wasn't able to make an excuse for them this time (without showing nepotism/special treatment) so he was forced to let them go.
If you headcanon Delia as a lesbian, how did Ash come to be?
Delia was young when she had Ash and I hc that she just didn’t really explore her sexuality much! I myself didn’t realized I liked women until I was 18 and didn’t know I liked ONLY women until like 2 years ago. She got married, had a baby and realized after her husband left that she liked women (trans people exist obviously but I’m also interpreting Ash’s father as a cis man).
Who do you think Ash’s dad is?
I don’t know and I don’t really care to explore it. I’m going off of the novel interpretation that he’s just a deadbeat that left to be a trainer, failed and never came back because of the shame. He’s not important.
Isn’t Giovanni Ash’s dad?
That’s a common misconception that people remember wrong from the Pokémon Live show. Delia mentions she dated Giovanni but then left him and his gang after meeting Ash’s father. I also don’t consider the live show canon personally! I follow The Birth of Mewtwo timeline where Madame Boss founded Team Rocket.
Do you think Delia and Giovanni dated at least?
Nah, I think he’s too old for her? I always got the vibe from The Birth of Mewtwo that he was quite a bit older than Jessie and it’d be sus if he was dating Delia when she was married to, and had a child with her husband at 18/19. He’s a bad guy but not a BAD guy.
You mentioned you still ship Jessie and James. Why not make a Jessie, James, Delia polycule?
I have a few reasons I’ve mentioned before! 1. I’m in super deep with this AU already and I feel it’d be very confusing for casual viewers of my stuff if James was added into the relationship haha. 2. I’ve drawn Jessie and James together since 2011 and took this AU as an opportunity to try my hand at writing them as queer, platonic besties bc I love that interpretation of them a lot as well. 3. I’m not poly myself and the way I write this ship is largely based off of my experiences with my girlfriend. I just know I’d favor the Jessie/Delia of it all which isn’t fair and not a good interpretation of a poly relationship. All that said, I DO super enjoy seeing peoples’ poly headcanons and art!
Who does James end up with in this AU?
No one. He's aroace and is happy to be single
Do Jessie and James have all their Pokémon in this AU
I think they have all the Pokémon that they did by the end of Mezase Pokémon Master (all their Pokémon that were left at HQ). Most of their released Pokémon have stayed released and the Alola Pokémon are still in Alola. I bring back Arbok and Weezing post-Jessie and Delia getting married. I may bring back Chimecho, Growlie and Cacnea if I think of an idea I like!
What are Meowth and James up to in this AU?
Hop back to the top of this post under the "Where to Start" section. All your questions will be answered.
Does Ash travel with anyone at this point of his life?
I don't have anyone in particular in mind! I could see him making new friends (Nemona???) or traveling with different combinations of old friends. Like him, Misty and Goh, him, Dawn and Cilan, him, Serena and Lillie etc.
Will Delia ever get over her phobia of snake Pokémon
Not fully! I think overcoming fears is fine and good but I think real PHOBIAS are much harder to get past and I don't want to cheapen it. She slowly gets used to Jessie's Seviper specifically and gets to the point where she can pet it comfortably with Jessie in the room. But otherwise, still scared and would need that same amount of time per Pokémon
Is Jessie gaining weight or is it just me?
Not just you! Jessie puts on a bit of relationship weight overtime as you'll see in the later comics in the timeline. Jessie grew in poverty, never knowing when her next meal would be and that continued into her life as a Team Rocket member. Once she was able to settle down (with a woman who runs her own restaurant no less) she's able to live a healthier lifestyle with regular meals and puts on some weight because of that.
Does Jessie ever feel self conscious about gaining weight?
Nope! She feels happier and healthier and hotter. She's also unreasonably excited to clear out her old clothes and get a new wardrobe.
Would Jessie and Delia ever have kids together or adopt?
Nah, Ash is enough for them! I have come up with hypothetical kids for them but they're not canon to this AU. Just a fun little thing for me.
Will you ever put this on webtoon?
Nah. People mostly ask me this because they want to read everything in the order of the timeline but to my knowledge, you can’t reorder chapters or installments which would defeat the purpose. I also don’t think nintendo fan stuff would fly there. Also, also it’s just extra work and another place to upload and I want to keep this all fun for myself~
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the-hydroxian-artblog · 6 months
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I love your animatronic toy OC guys so much, they have so much personality to them and their colours are really good (especially umbra)
Thank you! The funny thing about Umbra's design was that while I was developing it about two years ago and had some colors in mind, I described in text what I already came up with to an image generator for fun (shitty unconvincing old kind, vs now where it looks like shit but in a somewhat more convincing way) and it produced something so silly that I made her design better than what I would've settled with out of spite.
More details of my process and anti-AI ranting below the cut, so the examples given won't show up on search results. Google Images is getting polluted too much with slop to begin with.
Let's begin.
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In 2022 I was drafting up Umbra's design with mostly concrete details. At this time image generators were newer and much less convincing, and I was a bit less aware of just how unethical they were, so I fed one a text description of what I had drafted for her design out of curiosity. Something along the lines of, "doll of an anthropomorphic owl librarian in glasses, blazer/suit jacket, skirt, corset, high heels, sitting on a bookshelf" and probably a few more terms. Really specific, lengthy prompt.
I try to be open-minded and give new things a shot, but the results were Not Great. Ideally, I'd want to not share the AI pictures at all on-principle, but I feel like it's useful, transparent, and necessary to show them. Both as a means of not hiding anything, but also just to appreciate where the design is at in spite of it.
Outside of this particular collage of Weird Owls, no other pictures on this blog are AI-generated. AI Image Generation is harmful, and I am against its usage.
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But hey, two of the generated pictures look close, right? The top left is the closest, and bottom right is second.
That's because they started out worse, and I had to actually erase chunks of them and have the generator fill in the blanks to get anything remotely close to what I wanted. Misshapen limbs, unrecognizable anatomy, fever-dream clothing details, etc. They didn't even have a corset or proper legs until I slapped the generator in the face enough times to make it produce them. I was just using it to photobash, which was such an annoying process, I just went "this is dumb" and stopped. They're literally posed like that because I kept erasing and regnerating their limbs until they looked vaguely in-character. It literally only looks passable thanks to STRANGLING it with human input.
Before I used the image generator, I already drafted her to be night-themed with yellow eyes and something like purple, dark blue, or sky-blue as her main color; the generator making one owl yellow-eyed and purple was a happy coincidence, and the only thing the generative AI "came up with" that I didn't already have in mind or included in the prompt was the light blue shirt, which I did adapt into her cyan shirt and stockings/socks as well. That was a good call. You get One Point, Mr. AI.
...Which still meant that at its absolute best, it was a largely redundant step in the creative process if its contribution was worse than what a randomized palette generator or character creator could come up with.
That's already putting the ethics of it aside, like carbon emissions, data pollution, using artists' and photographers' work without credit or permission, the incentive to plagiarize, flooding sites like deviantart with slop, Willy Wonka Shit, etc etc etc. When people say "you can use AI as a tool though", this ordeal was enough to convince me that it's more trouble than its worth, even in its most ethical usage. I feel gross for having even tried. I wish I knew what sources went into the creation of those Weird Owls. It'd be better for research if the right people could be credited.
Nothing else on this blog is AI-generated or ever will be. The art below is purely my own (2022 vs a few weeks ago)):
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Actually drawing Umbra and solidifying her design was far more rewarding than having an image generator vaguely approximate my own ideas. I wanted her to look really special, so I used a black cape and pants, gold highlights and buttons, and blue undertones to make something more distinct. Also, neck floof. Very important. I wanted the head in particular to look distinct and original, going with bold black streaks to really help her look distinguished.
I also have certain inevitable Hydroisms for Fancy characters like her; most apparent in these designs for Chasey and Kaita from even longer ago, which were more of an influence than anything else. (Old art of mine from like 2021, Kaita ref looks wonky but Chasey still holds up nicely):
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Most of Umbra's other design elements were already commonly used with established ocs like Kaita, like her shape language, corset, skirt, heels, etc. It was my previous work with Chasey that inspired the use of gold buttons and highlights.
Umbra is also now a bluer shade of purple partly to distance the current design from that ordeal. All things considered, I'll probably make her more indigo next time. I already wanted her to have a wide color range from the get-go (Featured below is, again, purely my art from 2022:)
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I may use a different colored shirt and stockings in the future. I like to think she has many different shirts and clothes based on the different stages of the night sky, from dusk to dawn, and the painting I made in the top right there was an exploration of her range in different lighting.
All in all, it's frustrating. I'm proud of her design, but explaining all of this is annoying, because it's technically all relevant to showing how her colors were picked and how the design was made. I still technically have AI to """Thank""", in the way you thank a bad experience for encouraging you to make things better out of spite.
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sawyer-is-eepy · 2 months
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goodbye campfire fest!!
this has been so so much fun- i'm so happy i got to be able to be a part of this wonderful event with so many talented artists and writers- it's been so beautiful seeing everyone's interpretations and writing and i've loved seeing everyone come together to create something unique. being so excited to open tumblr everyday and see what people's contributions are has been the highlight of my days this week, and it's so cool to me that i can be a part of this for the first event, and even though it was a teensy bit stressful, i'm so glad i've been able to hit all the prompts.
i can't wait to see what people might post during late submissions!! gonna keep checking every day to see. I've found many new talented artists and writers I had never seen before through this event, you all are seriously so nice and have been so sweet to me and to each other, this event has made me so happy.
I can't wait to see more from all of you. happy fest and much love!
@outerwilds-events
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some more doodles(base game and eote spoilers) + random sappy rambling (positive vent?) below cut
some other random doodles from this weekend <3
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yes I gave prisoner ears. I'm sorry I'm too much of a furry for this fandom aha
on a serious note, this fandom and this game have been my favorite thing about this year so far. Seriously, I was actually having a really tough couple months around the start of this year. I was dealing with a really really toxic friend in November and December and I was struggling to get over them. I was having a hard time letting go of my hurt and of the memory of them and our friendship- I was hurt and angry and I missed how great it was in the beginning. It was really tough for me, I didn't have any way to distract myself and I didn't have a way to let out my feelings. I felt stuck and trapped with a horrible memory and I didn't have the motivation to let it go. Then comes along this silly little game, that I remembered trying to play forever ago. I decided that I should probably try to play it again, and god it was the best decision I've ever made. This game, it has brought me so so much joy. I finally felt like I was able to let go and learn to move on and just enjoy the good memories while still remembering that they're in the past and while I can't change what happened, I can look forward to the future and hope. this game helped me cope with the grief, it helped me learn how to take care of myself and recover. It affected me so much in many ways, I will never ever forget it. This community has also brought me so much happiness, I've met so many wonderful and kind people, and I've became friends with some really cool people(one person in particular has been especially swaggers, you know who you are you weirdo /affectionate /plat). campfire fest has been great and I'm glad I got to be a part of it!! When I was thinking of what to draw for today, all I could think of was the immense amount of support I've received and given, and seen being passed around. So I figured it should be something to express that love!! Much love, and goodbye to campfire fest!! Can't wait to do this again next year <333
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luvclimber · 8 months
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☆Introduction☆
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About me:
1: Hello there! Welcome to my blog! You can call me by my username or Climber, but my real name is Alana but I will mostly feel comfortable going by my username! My pronouns are He/Him but I’m actually a female but I feel oddly comfortable with those pronouns than She/Her pronouns! I’m also Cupioromantic and lithromantic! I’m also a multifandom, multishipper, rareshipper, crossshipper as well!
2: I am a self-taught artist! I have had many moments in my life where I felt about giving up on art, but I have soon to realize that I started to get better at art the longer I continued to try and practice on my own and make more art! I was a little hesitant on showing my art work to the public internet community since I thought people would make fun of it! But I saw that people started to like my art work that I post and so that gave me more confidence to post more of my art work and improve!
3: There are specific stuff that I post on my blog, things such as DemJay, Law of talos, Endzone, Burning Avalon, Witches dimension! I will sometimes post some slightly suggestive stuff but I will mainly post normal and fluff art of my favorite characters! But I may take a week off here and there every once in a while but I promise to post daily every week!
My top 4 kins:
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Random facts:
1: I have actually been through many sexuality from the start of a very young age! I desperately tried to look for the right sexuality that fit me! I went from thinking I was a lesbian, straight, bisexual, asexual, pansexual, aromatic, quoisexual, to finally finding the right one that fit me! Cupioromantic and lithromantic!
2: I was a Lankybox fan for a long period of time until they started to post some stuff that I didn’t really find entertaining anymore? I guess that’s how you can put it? I mainly started to watch TikTok and other YouTubes more often now. I actually had a Lankybox TikTok account which one was Gacha and one was edits of them! But I did end up deleting them and changing my account entirely. I did have one other Gacha account on TikTok that I was famous on but sadly I got logged out.
3: I have a YouTube channel that my father used for my garden, the channel and videos are still up, actually! But of course I won’t give you the name of the YouTube channel because I find them cringe and the videos were so long ago-
4: Whenever someone new follows or likes my post I just take a look at their account and see what type of stuff they post! So I kinda stalk your account for a little while!
Interact if:
People who are in the DemJay, Law of talos, Endzone, Burning Avalon, Witches dimension fandom! I love meeting people who have the same interest as me!
Climber fans or kins! I actually have been a fan of Climber since 3 years ago! Also I don’t want people to think I’m saying I’m his number one fan since I find it cringe to say I’m his number one fan. I just really love Climber and could relate with him-
Artists and small artists! I love seeing people’s different styles in their drawings and the fact they put work into it! Like I said, I’m a self-taught artists and worked to get to find the art style I like!
Do not interact:
Problematic people! I really feel uncomfortable with people who are problematic follow me. If you are associated with a problematic person and just make them as an exception for their problematic acts, just because they’re cool in some way or your friend or anything like that, please do not interact with my account. Things like proshippers, pedophiles, loilcon lovers, darkshippers, racist people, homophobic’s, anything like that. And please do tell me if I do or say anything problematic! If you still continue to interact with my blog and ignore my boundaries you will immediately get a HARD block!
People who are firm believers about being a hater. If you’re going to simply going to go on my account and hate for no reason, you will get a HARD block! All of us are just trying to have fun!
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zeondraws · 1 year
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I must say I had alot of fun drawing this one a couple of days ago!
dunno if I print this out for diary
I often scroll through tumblr to look through the art tips tag and honestly it's so fun finding neat little art hacks and colour theory tips that I always want to try out when I can hop on my laptop!
Even if I might feel a bit like "ooh damn when will I become as good?" But I also want to try and channel my feelings into motivation, to continue to have fun and try out new things and develop through this.
This whole art path is so scary to me at times, because there is this? Responsibility I feel like, that I have when I post my bus art online, how would people react? Did I have fun drawing this? How will I continue my goals?
Since I want to try and shake up the whole bus community in some way, not like in a bad way but to perhaps make it feel more interesting. I feel like there is a lack of creativity or a lack of artists compared to the amount of bus manufacturers and bus companies you have who try and sell busses, make them interesting to people etc, but how do you reach people? For me it feels like it mostly just reaches people who are already interested in busses and the bus companies always feel sterile or very cooperate (I think I have already mentioned this in a previous post, I often repeat myself)
I am already seeming to have small success, I don't know how to call it or how to feel because this is a very new territory for me.
In my discord server some of my active members started drawing much more, which makes me feel very honored that they're inspired to do so because of me. Some even made bus animations or silly bus drawings or comics. Heck when setra announced their new bus we had some fun talking about it, and one of my members drew fanart of it which is amazing.
Like they're probably the first and only person who made fanart of this setra bus, okay there is official artworks (somewhere), but I'd like to point out that bus fanart is waaay more rare than your usual plane/train or idk fanart of animated shows.
I can't stress enough how busses don't get enough love, there is this universal thing of people unaware of them.
So it's obviously one of the reasons I started my tumblr and Instagram account, hopefully after my apprenticeship I will start my youtube stuff which seems way more scary. Because at the end of the day I am a nobody, who is dreaming of changing something. But of course I don't want to forget to have fun and enjoy what I do, there are so many silly bus stories I want to share.
Tho it feels somewhat scary to do the first step, because I didn't think that I'd be standing here doing this myself. But who else is gonna draw busses? I can't wait years until someone random appears to draw what I want to see. So I'll do it myself (still scary tho, getting outside your comfort zone LOL)
Because I feel like there is something that those bus manufacturers/companies are not acknowledging over the potential . And I am here to change that, however I can with my silly and messed up ideas. haha
I am currently taking a week break from discord so that I can collect myself again and focus on other things. And also to draw BUS
Bro I have sooooo many bus ideas on my trello the list will never get lower.
I shall end this post with a meme
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I love Mushroom Bus very much
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mattsvn · 3 years
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Nostalgia.
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Iwaizumi Hajime x fem!reader
Summary: A summer after graduation finds Iwaizumi Hajime halfway across the globe, sitting in a lecture hall and staring at a golden dome that reminds him of the world and his place in it. Or, the lack thereof.
Genre: Slight angst to fluff. Character introspection, self discovery!
Word count: 4.4k
Warnings: none.
A/N: Guess who’s crying :smiley: Okay, so I got inspired by this tik tok, check it out, show the artist some love, and adding to another idea I had this came up, I hope you guys like it!  ALSO, that beautiful summary was suggested by @meliorist-midoriya​ !!!​ Repost from my old blog, this is on my favorite fics ever written hehe
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There is something distinctive about the traces left by people in the places they inhabited. Whether intentional or not, to enter a house that was once occupied is to step into an unknown life, where all that remains are the lines drawn on the wall frames, with random dates, leaving a record of someone’s growth.
A part of the wall with a lighter color, where photographs once hung and the trace of old drawings on the wall could be seen even if you paid close attention. Seeing the home you had lived in for years empty, lifeless or without its distinctive smell caused an ache in your chest that you couldn’t describe, how was that atmosphere created again, with spotless walls, perfect floors and the lack of human warmth?
You weren’t afraid of living alone, you were afraid of having a lonely life.
It was frightening to think that the apartment you had just bought might feel like it was inhabited by a ghost, with no trace that anyone had ever been there. One way or another you wanted to make that space, with only two rooms and one bathroom, feel like your home, even if it was just you, even if you would only live there for a few months.
So, amidst the worry about establishing a home and hundreds of paperwork, came the first day of college, one more step to adapt to, the breaking of a routine you had just begun to create.
There was no better way to start that school year than by being on time, so, at least for the first week, you tried to be there early enough. It gave you time to get through the school buildings, and to finish your coffee just before the first class started.
Thursday arrived, with the first class being Medieval Art, not usually a subject that caught the attention of many, so it was common to see empty seats. Still, as usual, you were planning on choosing the seat right next to the window, where the sunlight illuminated your notes, but that day, it seemed that someone already occupied that place.
You sat next to him, there was no reason not to share the table, didn’t pay attention to him, it seemed that the boy was taking a nap a few minutes before class, probably he had a class before that one, or he was just tired. The teacher settled into her seat, and you glanced sideways, only to see that the boy was still asleep, not moving.
“One day, the architect, Frank Gehry said: architecture should speak of its time and place, but yearn for timelessness” she began, while behind her appeared the image of a building you had heard too much about. “I think one of the best representations of this is Hagia Sofia” she continued, showing the image of that beautiful golden dome behind her, she kept talking.
As the guy next to you opened his eyes, sleepily he took a deep breath, concentrating on the image in front of him, with some concern he took the supplies from his backpack to take notes for the class, he seemed lost, confused and, in general, tired, like he was there by mistake, or, against his will.
Iwaizumi was not usually like this. Before moving to the United States, he had never been late for a class, he was the type of person who kept everything in order, always punctual, with notes in order and an impeccable grade. A role model in every sense of the word, student, athlete and perfect son.
But as soon as he arrived from his flight, tired to the bone and affected by jet lag, he slept as much as he could, only to wake up in the early morning, stunned by the different time zone he could not fall asleep at the right time, he still couldn’t get used to the food offered there, and he was unable to find the ingredients he would commonly use in Miyagi to eat.
People drove on the left seat, and the road was on the right side, they used to eat on the street without any concern, or on the way to their jobs and schools, nor did there seem to be manners in public transportation, at least no the ones he knew. There were words that confused him, and the symbols on the streets made his head spin.
People did not have the same habits he knew, and he noticed that after only a couple of days after moving in. By the time school started, Iwaizum was still trying to sleep at the time he was used to and didn’t make it until two or three in the morning, so, it resulted in waking up late and sleeping in between classes, he still wasn’t used to having his notes in English, so his handwriting looked weird, the teachers spoke too fast for him to understand, therefore, his notes were all over the place
Not to mention how unpunctual they were, he found himself a couple of times arriving late to class, only to find out that the teacher wasn’t there, and that it would probably take them twenty minutes more to arrive, and sometimes, they would cancel the class when you were already there, just because.
Even in the classes he looked forward the most, he found himself tired, bored, easily distracted, and he expected the same from this one, a subject he had taken only to complete his units. But, when he opened his eyes, he swore he had never seen anything as beautiful as that. A gorgeous dome of gleaming gold, with light streaming in through the windows and the distinctive marks of history on its walls.
It took him a few seconds to listen to the professor properly, as he was still impressed with what he saw on the projector, there was nothing that did not interest him, from the columns to that painting of the Virgin Mary, an impeccable marble floor, and, the mixture of both religions on its walls was perhaps what left him most curious of all that he had seen.
There was nothing like that in Japan, or at least not that he remembered. Byzantine architecture had that distinctive feature in which it left you mesmerized for a moment, he was so enraptured by it that he didn’t notice that there was someone sitting next to him, taking notes of the things the teacher was saying, with a slightly frown, concentrating, and different pens scattered around the table. The teacher continued talking, still detailing how a building created almost fifteen hundred years ago remained one of the finest constructions in human history.
Hagia Sofia, she read from the blackboard. He wrote down the title in a slightly disorganized way, along with the rest of the words on the board.
Hagia Sofia, meaning: holy wisdom. Constantinople, now Istanbul.
“Long before what we now know, the Byzantine Empire took place in what is now Istanbul, the capital of this empire is perhaps one of the most important historical and architectural sites of the Medieval Era, this was the largest known church  for about a thousand years. It has been used as a church, a mosque and now serves as a museum.” She explained, showing the various images of the building. ”There were two later constructions after this, one destroyed in a fire and the second in the Niká riots, then, in the year 532 construction began on what we now know as Hagia Sofia.“
"Wow” Iwazumi sighed, absently sketching the shape of the building.
“I won’t tell you much about this building, at least not for now,” said the teacher, pausing for a moment to look at the picture. “I want an essay on this topic, and I would like you to gather in pairs for it.” she asked them. “I just want your opinions and analysis on the things that are most important to you about the place and what you think is meant to be represented by these, either imagery or architecture. Your partner will be the person who is closest to you, starting with the two of you, at the bottom.”
You looked at Iwaizumi out of the corner of your eye, having to work with people you didn’t know was always a problem, but, you hoped it wouldn’t be like that this time. He also looked at you, a little relieved thinking that you would surely know something about Medieval Architecture, not like him, who felt totally lost in that new subject. Even so, he returned his gaze to the front, memorizing every detail of that dome in his mind.
The class continued, with the teacher talking about historical processes in the fifth century and the topics that would be taken throughout the course, Hajime could not help but see the excitement that certain topics caused you, especially with the mention of some gothic buildings. And so, in the blink of an eye, the class was over, and before he realized it, you were already grabbing your things to leave.
“My next class is Historical Theory, what’s yours? We can organize on the way” you said, looking at him for a second while you closed your backpack. Iwaizumi tried to put his belongings away as quickly as possible, but failed a bit with his clumsy movements. “What’s your major?"
"Oh, Sports Science,” he replied. Your reaction was as expected: confusion, what was a sports science major doing in a medieval art class? “All the other classes were busy and I needed some extra units.”
“Oh, I see” you nodded, walking out of the classroom with him walking beside you.
“What’s your major?” he asked, feeling somewhat embarrassed that he hadn’t asked that before.
“Art History” you replied, with a smile. “By the way, my name is y/n” you said, extending your hand, he received it, still not used to the way people introduced themselves there, but little by little he was starting to adjust to it.
“Iwaizumi Hajime” he cleared his throat, here they speak by first names, not last names, you idiot, he said to himself in his mind. “Hajime.”
“So, Hajime, you didn’t organize your classes on time, you take naps before class, and you don’t know anything about Medieval Art” you jokingly commented. “We have quite a bit to learn, don’t you think?”
“Uh… y-yes” he nodded, stopping when you did, not even realizing how far he had walked. “I won’t let you do all the work, if that’s what you’re worried about” he assured, it seemed they were in front of the door to your next class the moment you stopped and looked at the door, Iwaizumi didn’t want to take up your time, but he had no idea what to say either.
“Well, how about we meet in the library later this week? You can give me your number so we can schedule the day” you hoped the professor wouldn’t come to the classroom while you were talking to  Iwaizumi, as he seemed like a very nice person, despite how nervous he was.
“Sure, I have the whole afternoon off tomorrow, is that okay?” you nodded, extending your phone to him so he could write down his number and name, to your luck, he returned it just in time.
“Sounds perfect to me, I’ll text you as soon as my class is over” you said, saying goodbye and entering just before the teacher, who closed the door behind himself.
Iwaizumi stared at the door for a few seconds, letting out a sigh,then, he walked to his next class. It felt awfully strange to walk around campus alone, with no one by his side. Maybe he had gotten too used to spending his free time with the rest of his friends in highschool, and, at times like these, where he was waiting for a message from a cute girl, he couldn’t help but think about how much he missed them.
He was alone, and that was terrifying.
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Iwaizumi looked at his phone for the third time in an hour, the class, food chemistry, was just short of making him fall asleep, yet he couldn’t help but look at his phone and wonder at what point the cute girl in the Medieval Art class would send him a message.
She didn’t until almost four hours later, just as Iwaizumi had recently returned to his apartment and was working on a long assignment for the rest of the week. Ignoring the sound of a message at first, thinking it was probably Oikawa bugging him about some new thing he learned in Argentina, so, he didn’t look at his phone until a couple of minutes later, when a second message came through.
“Hi! Sorry I didn’t talk to you sooner, I’ve been a little busy, but this is my number!”
“My last class ends at 2:00 p.m., do you mind if I meet you at that time in the library?”
He answered almost immediately, regretting later for doing it so quickly, you look like a desperate idiot, he thought. To his luck, as soon as he locked the phone, the screen lit up again with the reply.
It seemed that after that things flowed perfectly, even though before he met her they would have seemed like inconveniences to him, now they looked as an opportunity. The professor for tomorrow’s class informed them that he was out of town, so his classes would start until the following week, which gave Iwaizumi a chance to continue with his homework calmly, and, to get ready to see the pretty girl the next day, maybe even sleep properly that night.
However, nothing went as he planned.
Again, he found himself staring at the ceiling at midnight, without any possibility of being able to fall asleep, no matter how hard he tried, nothing seemed to work. That wasn’t his bed, nor his sheets or his favorite pillow, it wasn’t his wall or the window overlooking his backyard. As he stared at the empty, flat ceiling, he wondered why he couldn’t at least see a golden dome so he would have something to think about while he tried to sleep.
And so he woke up quite late, much later than he was used to. Maybe his body took the opportunity to recover all his lost energy, he had no idea. The only thing he knew was that he woke up thirty minutes before the agreed time with the pretty girl, and, it took fifteen minutes to get to the library from where he was.
He sent as many messages as he could while getting dressed and trying to look as presentable as possible. At least it wasn’t strange to see people running around campus, although it was in the first few weeks of school, where no one was really worried about anything.
“I told you I could wait a while” you mentioned, Iwaizumi was standing in front of her, trying to control his breathing, visibly agitated for having run all the way to the library. “Tell me you at least ate something” you murmured, in a way to accept his apology, then he sat on the free seat in front of you, trying to avoid that questioning.
“I can eat something later, sorry I was late” he apologized, again, he expected you to be upset, but you weren’t, instead, the first thing he saw was a reassuring smile, you hadn’t been more than ten minutes late, so, there was really no problem. “Again, I’m sorry, I was…”
“You don’t have to apologize, Iwaizumi. You were only ten minutes late, I’ve known people who take an hour to show up” the boy looked at the table for the first time, it was almost like the mess she had in yesterday’s class, only now it had several open books around it. “My class ended early so I went ahead to research an assignment I had, don’t you want to go get something to eat before we start?”
“I’d rather do this and then I can eat something, I wouldn’t want to waste your time even more” he replied, it was too obvious that he still didn’t quite master English, or maybe he did but he was quite embarrassed about how it was that he pronounced things. “I’ve never had this happen to me before, I’m sorry, I’m not usually like this.”
“How many times do I have to tell you it’s okay? Seriously, but why are you late? If you say it doesn’t usually happen to you” Iwaizumi looked towards the window with a frown, he felt like he would spend an embarrassment for that, because, sleeping late was not a good excuse, actually, nothing was a good excuse for his lateness, but still, he sighed. “Don’t tell me you’re coming in with a hangover?”
“No, no, not at all. It’s just… I’m still not used to the time change here and I’m used to sleeping at a totally different time” he said, though there was more to it.
The insomnia was only a collateral result of how he felt, and perhaps what kept him most irritable. Perhaps he had chosen that change too quickly, or the feeling was probably something that would fade with time. But he couldn’t help but feel like he wasn’t quite connected to reality, like he was living a strange dream. The routine he had worked on for years that kept him safe was gone, and was now out of his reach.
He missed going out every Tuesday for lunch with Oikawa, Makki and Mattsun. He missed walking to school and greeting his neighbors, or the way Oikawa’s older sister squeezed his cheeks, even though he said how much he detested it, he missed the karaoke he went to once a month and his mother’s food, hell, he even missed Oikawa’s obnoxious nephew.
“So, where are you from? Moving is hard enough, I can’t imagine doing it from another country” he looked at her, realizing she was genuinely concerned and curious, she meant it. The sincerity brought him calm, enough to say what he felt.
“Japan, I just got here a couple of weeks ago, I still don’t understand much and my English isn’t the best so I’m not having the best time” he pointed out, as he picked up his notebook, watching as she jotted something down on the computer, adding a document to start the essay. “Not to be rude, but your culture is really weird.”
“You don’t have to tell me, it is. But you end up getting used to it, don’t you? I find people’s behavior patterns depending on their culture interesting” Iwaizumi hadn’t even noticed that there was already a book on Byzantine architecture on the table, which showed a picture of Hagia Sophia from the outside. “Besides, it’s normal to miss your hometown, don’t you think, what did you most like to do there?”
“Playing volleyball with my friends” he answered without hesitation, for it was true. He missed every detail of it, from the practices, to the coach yelling at his teammates to the games, even the ones he lost.
“Oh, were they on a team together?” she put the computer aside, devoting her full attention to him. Iwaizumi nodded, ready to talk about all the amazing things his team had. “Were you guys good?”
“Well, yes. At least within reason, we were. We never made it to nationals, but within our prefecture we were very good” he nodded, still feeling the bitter taste of defeat on the tip of his tongue as if it had happened yesterday, his last chance to go to nationals ended before it even started.
“And what position did you play?” he questioned, Iwaizumi picked up the book on the table solely to have something to distract himself with.
“Uh, wing spiker. I was the ‘ace’ of the school, but of course, I couldn’t be any of it without Oikawa."
"Oikawa?”
The conversation did not stop since then, between readings, corrections and stories about his high school, Iwaizumi did not even realize that almost three hours had passed, three hours in which he could not believe what he saw in images, despite all the fear he had, all the nostalgia that accumulated inside him, seeing that building in Constantinople brought him a peace that he could not manage to understand, no matter how much he wondered what was going on.
Although it didn’t compare to how the pretty girl explained things, he should probably stop referring to her as the pretty girl and start calling her by her name, as he ended up forgetting it, and every time she said his name, he blamed himself for not remembering hers. He learned everything he wanted to know in one afternoon, thanks to her, the semi domes, the atrium, every detail, structural and artistic there, he memorized it with her voice, melodious, calm, safe.
After making a couple of questions, he lost his fear of asking what he was seeing, because, as she told him, “no one knows everything, there will always be someone who knows something you don’t”. So, he ended up engaged in a conversation about the wonders of medieval architecture and no more than ten minutes later, the conversation drifted to the karaoke that his friends loved, or the park where he and Oikawa learned to play volleyball.
Life at the university became more bearable thanks to her, Iwaizumi heard the story of how she had just moved out of her parents’ house, how they also moved out of their house and the pain it caused her to leave the home she loved empty. She enjoyed knitting, watching movies and listening to new music all the time. In a couple of weeks, he discovered her favorite food, and the kind of clothes she liked best, the movies that made her cry and the ones that made her die laughing, and with each thing he learned, she asked him the same questions. Even though he wasn’t entirely sure how he was supposed to answer, or what people used to say, it made him wonder if he seemed like a nice person or someone who would be interesting to spend time with.
Tuesdays of going out to eat became Tuesdays of organized movies in the dorms, once-a-month karaokes became visits to museums instead of his neighbors, now he was greeting his roommates every morning, now the cute girl in Medieval Art class was the one squeezing his cheeks, it seemed that, little by little, everything was starting to be as he knew it.
Or at least that’s what he thought
“But what do you like, Iwaizumi?” she asked him on a sunny afternoon where sunlight illuminated her room and there was a random movie on TV as the background noise, around her a lot of snacks and fried food, that’s what Saturdays were like, relaxed and sunny. “I almost feel like I know Oikawa like you do, but you don’t tell me much about yourself.”
“Huh?” he asked, doubtful, hadn’t he been talking about himself all that time, or had he only thought he was? “I don’t know what you want to know about me.”
“I want to know who you are, beyond all your friends and the people in your life.I know what Oikawa likes and how many fans he had or the perfect settings he did, but I want to know about you.” she told him.
She didn’t know if it was because the girl was an art enthusiast, or if she just hadn’t met someone who wanted to know more about him for her own pleasure, for what she felt was inexplicable.
“Well, well… with my team” he began, stopping the moment he saw the look on the girl’s face, who could only thus make him feel as if he were a scolded child. He sighed, running his hand through his hair, confused as to what it was he should say.
“Who are you, Iwaizumi, what do you like, what song do you like the most? I don’t want to know about other people, I want to know about you, about what makes you who you are.” She began, the moment only seemed more special with the way the sun was shining on her skin and her smile seemed to shine even brighter than it always did. “I know you’re a good teammate, a good son, a good friend, but who are you, what are the qualities that you have?”
He looked into her eyes, how many times hadn’t he stopped to look into those beautiful eyes that stole his breath, or those lips that said the cutest yet most painful things?“
"Iwaizumi. I want you to tell me the story that you have, like Hagia Sophia, do you remember all the marks that it has? the mix of everything that lies in you? There is so much history in who you are beyond your friends, I want to know if you are happy or if you like ice cream, how you react to things. I hope you understand me, it’s okay to like things that your friends do or showed you, but I don’t think it should be all that you are, so, who are you?”
Still not taking his eyes off her, he remembered every detail of the building he studied for weeks, the religious motifs and art on its walls, the history even in the broken parts of the floor, or those portions where the paint was completely gone. And, with tears in his eyes, he replied:
“I don’t know.” He murmured, his voice trembling.
And he really didn’t know, he had lived so long being a friend, son, teammate and neighbor that, little by little, without realizing it, he stopped prioritizing the things that to him and only to him made him happy.
“Well, there’s only one thing to do about it” she murmured in the same way, very close to him as if she were telling him a secret. “Find out who you are.”
And just like that, the first picture of the two of you decorated your wall, along with some paint smudges from a sunny afternoon, a canvas, and some brushes, and a volleyball mark at first. Two wrongs can make a right, your mother would say. You, in search of rebuilding your space, and he, in search of himself.
You couldn’t have picked a better time than that, or a better life than that.
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taglist: @sugas-sweetheart @kirislut @hannahalanib1 @goopyartiste @yee-harr @ohno-grapes @peach-pops @meliorist-midoriya @milktyama @majestic-sea-flip-flop @starlessnyx @tanakasimpcorner @msbyslugg @ordinary-ace @boosyboo9206
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lovelylogans · 4 years
Text
i wish i knew how (your eyes are like starlight now)
warnings: vampires (blood drinking mentioned), alcohol consumption, food mentions, cuddling, kissing, death mentions, if i’ve missed any please let me know!
pairing: logan/patton
word count: 6,003
notes: for @fangirltothefullest for our discord server’s secret santa! prompted with “Preferably logan-centric and fluffy! Logicality would be great! Logince would also be good. Maybe some cute cuddles by a fireplace?” title is from “baby it’s cold outside!” the idea of vampires being able to eat red food comes from a book i remember reading as a kid, but i cannot place the title, so if anyone knows it please let me know!
Hot chocolate with peppermint schnapps and Bailey’s, it turns out, is a particularly adept calmative.
It’s made the world go hazy and lovely and beautiful, and that’s even before Logan acknowledges the way his eyes are half-lidded and he’s leaning his head a bit more against the side of his wingback armchair than he would if he were entirely sober.
Logan narrows his eyes down at his mug, the one Roman had wheel-thrown and painted him with the chemical illustration of the molecular construction of caffeine on it, which is half-drained, the whipped cream and marshmallows melted, the peppermint stick meant to stir already losing its red stripes. Logan plucks it from the mug and sticks it into his mouth, crunching it, wriggling in the armchair to get more comfortably seated, and to get a better view.
Roman, Janus, Virgil, and Patton have long since been occupied with a board game; Remus left to do whatever it is that Remus does at night, probably screaming profanities at random passerby, so it’s just the five of them left. The Christmas party’s been winding down slowly for the past hour or so, the fireplace still crackling but burning lower and lower, their hot chocolate supply depleted, and Roman and Virgil’s fits of competitiveness losing fervor as the moon creeps higher and higher in the sky. The white of the waxing moon peeks out against the clouds that distribute the fat, fluffy flakes falling from the sky.
The snow catches the light of the Christmas lights hung outside the house (goodness, hadn’t that been a trying day) so the snow gleams in technicolor reflection, the rest of the world lit by the hazy orange glow of the street lamps. It is very beautiful, and Logan, in an unusually sentimental fit that he would tell himself in the morning was brought on by the alcohol, is incredibly grateful to be alive, at this precise moment, that allows him the company of such wonderful friends in such a beautiful world.
What a statistically improbable event they all are. What an outright scientifically impossible group they all make—a vampire, a set of twins that turned out to be a banshee and a siren, a selkie, and two humans. Three years ago Logan would have scoffed at the idea of any sort of supernatural, mythical humanoid, much less even suspected he’d meet them. And now he is in love with one, and is best friends with the others, and his life is so strange, so odd, so wonderful.
Logan comes back into himself when Roman cries out in protest, making Logan’s ears ring unpleasantly, as Janus crows in victory, holding the longest road card aloft, the dark gray seal-skin on his face gleaming pearlescent in the firelight. 
“Cheater!” Roman accuses, his voice still maintaining that double-pitch—a high keen layered over Roman’s typically pleasant baritone—that always makes something in Logan’s head throb.
“Just because you didn’t strategize your road properly,” Janus gloats, pointing—and yes, the yellow road winding around the edge of Catan is decidedly longer than the red road circling over itself in the middle.
All the while, Virgil is muttering darkly about how useless the Largest Army card has been, tossing it aside, and Patton looks up at Logan, dark eyes glinting brightly in amusement, freckles speckled across his face like constellations, trying his best to hide his smile around the specially-ordered red-dominant candy canes he’s been eating all season, his fangs gleaming white, freed from the fake teeth Patton usually wears to pass as human, his lips tinged artificially red.
Logan feels even warmer all over at the sight of him.
Patton’s eyes get even brighter, and he flashes a sweet smile at Logan before he turns back to the board game and breaks up the squabbling with patient declarations of “Everyone did a really great job!” and “The fun’s what matters, right?” and being so stubborn and relentless in his optimism and platitudes that Janus and Roman relent and grumble grudging “good game”s at each other.
Patton’s far more patient than the pair of them—which makes sense, as he’s been practicing at it since the seventeenth century, according to all their estimations surrounding the first edition of Human Understanding he’d acquired the month after he’d been turned, in a fit of uncharacteristically dark humor—so he always wins out when it comes to digging in his heels and cheerfully going about something with the consistency of the little bird and the diamond mountain.
Roman ducks out to sulk for a moment, under the excuse of adjusting Patton’s painstakingly maintained gramophone he’d bought in the 1920s—he still has the early prototype phonograph he bought in the 1870s, but that one is even more painstakingly preserved in the rooms full of obsolete technologies, clothes, and knick-knacks that Patton’s accrued and hoarded throughout the years like a magpie—and the sound of Bing Crosby crackles to life in the next room, crooning “White Christmas,” the snapping of the fire providing unintentionally harmonious percussion. Logan wouldn’t be surprised if this is one of the original vinyls, too—Patton’s got loads of vintage music from artists Logan had never even heard of before.
Janus bows out, next, content to allow the high of his victory usher him out the door. He even allows Patton to fuss over ensuring his coat is warm enough to protect him from the snow, considering he’s wearing his sealskin coat and not a proper winter coat, and then even lets him fret over Janus staying moisturized, despite the fact that both Janus and Logan have attempted to explain that Janus’ version of moisturized and the human version of moisturized are quite different in execution, one being smearing lotion all over oneself and the other consisting of sealing himself into his skin and taking a dip in the nearest ocean. 
Logan mentally backtracks over the previous sentence and immediately blames Patton for the pun, and simultaneously promises himself to never utter it in Patton’s presence. Patton still brings up the time Logan had accidentally mentioned Patton sinking his teeth into something, and can hardly finish recounting it before bursting into giggles. He is fortunate he is so adorable, otherwise it would irk Logan to no end. As it is, when it happens, Logan can’t summon up anything stronger than resigned affection. 
He’s in love with a vampire who is currently fretting over a selkie with the exact air of a concerned father. It’s a fate he’s all too eagerly accepted.
Janus usually gets snappy about being mother-henned, so Logan suspects that either the Bailey’s has done a number on him, or the Christmas sentimentality is getting to him. 
And, considering that Janus had one mug of mulled wine with dinner, Logan has a fairly good guess as to which is the root cause—especially taking into consideration Janus allows Patton to hug him goodbye. Janus wishes him a happy Christmas in a tone that is not quite as drawlingly dramatic as usual.
By then, the gramophone is playing a new song, a soprano prettily warbling “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas,” and Roman seems to be over his discontent over losing because he joins in, singing pleasantly rather than shrieking—he usually leaves the wailing to the banshee in the family, it’s just that the whole “drawing men to their deaths” aspect of his voice emerges when his temper flares—and Logan swallows down the sudden lump in his throat at the sound of it.
Of course, Roman’s voice is supernaturally exquisite, but there’s something different about it now; Roman had tried enchanting Logan, exactly once, after Logan had pestered him for weeks out of scientific curiosity, so he can say with certainty that this isn’t like the captivating sound that put him in a stupor with the speed and subtlety of being hit by a train, but it’s like someone has captured the flame in the fireplace and tempered it to a temperature that a human could stand, the cozy sensation of being beside a fire rather than the fire itself, and set it directly inside his heart.
You’re happy, a sober corner of his brain says dryly. You know this, you’re happy.
He is.
He is stupidly, incandescently, absolutely happy.
He will blame the dryness of the room from the fire for the sudden wetness in his eyes when Virgil joins in, usually quite shy about singing, but it is almost equally as pleasant as Roman’s, even though Virgil’s vocal chords (and the rest of Virgil) were entirely, completely, mortally human.
They are excellent, the pair of them. Not just their voices, but them, as people—they are excellent. Logan is exceptionally glad to have made their companionship.
Logan takes a deep breath, downs the last half of his hot chocolate, and launches himself from his armchair, perhaps a bit wobblier than he was at the start of the night, and Roman laughs without halting his song, wrapping an arm around Logan’s shoulder to steady him.
He can only join in for the last part of the song, which is probably for the best; Logan supposes his voice is tolerable enough, but it surely cannot compare to a siren, or to Virgil’s voice, rumbling like thunder. Also, he does not want to make a fool of himself, and surely singing more Christmas carols than necessary while not entirely sober would be a surefire way to do that. 
Out of the corner of his eyes, he sees Patton watching the three of them, a fond expression on his face, even if there is a flash of sudden gloom that passes over his face as the three of them sing “ Through the years we all will be together, if the fates allow,” and Logan frowns to himself, noting it.
Intellectually, he is aware of the various burdens an immortal life forces upon its receiver; Patton has hundreds if not thousands of sketchings and, when the technology became available, photographs of people he had known through the hundreds of years of his life, painstakingly filed away. 
Intellectually, he is aware that Patton was the source of unexpected windfalls that had been bestowed on Virgil’s family throughout the years, the reason Virgil and his siblings could afford to go to college; it is only after he and Virgil knew who Patton truly was that they found the reason behind the luck that struck his family once a generation. Patton had once been Virgil’s great-great-great-grandmother Violetta’s dearest friend, and she his; he’s been anonymously helping the descendants of all his friends in a similar manner for centuries. 
Intellectually. He is aware that Patton fears the day that he will lose them all, and he will be left alone, unchanged, eternally in his late twenties, as he has been for centuries.
It is different to be intellectually aware of something, and to remember seeing Patton show Virgil the portrait he had personally painted of Violetta and choke back his tears because he’d missed her so much, and meeting and befriending Virgil had been a bit like having a piece of her back in his life again, and getting to know you has been such a gift, such a blessing. She would have adored you, as I do, and then Virgil had hugged him, and Patton had gotten so overcome he had not been able to say much else.
It is this memory plucking at his heartstrings that sends him stumbling in Patton’s direction.
Patton moves so quickly that Logan’s eyes can’t track it; one moment he was watching the three of them, the next he’s caught Logan around the waist, smiling down at him.
“Hi,” Patton says, and Logan takes a half-step closer to wrap his arms around Patton’s neck.
“Hello,” Logan says. He is about to attempt to say something that is emotionally adept, he really is, except Patton’s skin is smooth and cold under his fingers, and his lips are still tinged red, and Patton’s eyes dart down to Logan’s lips and then looks him in the eye and then he smiles, and any particularly subtle ideas about how to probe Patton’s emotions or perhaps to get him to stop thinking about the curse of bearing witness to the passage of time entirely flee his mind.
He barely has enough time to hope that Patton’s mind is similarly empty before Patton meets him halfway, pressing his lips against Logan’s; even though they’ve been together for years, Logan still isn’t quite used to the chill of Patton’s lips meeting his own. It makes him shiver every time.
Patton is always so sweet, so soft—Logan thinks only part of that is that he is a vampire afraid of hurting his comparatively delicate human lover, and the majority of it is because Patton strives to be sweet and soft as a default state of being, because he is a person who understands that kindness is not a state of being but constantly, consciously making mindful choices to be kind—and his kisses reflect that about him. 
He almost always tastes of mint, because Logan had established early that he was perfectly fine with Patton drinking blood, he would not be facing secondary exposure to someone else’s blood, absolutely not, he holds a less than zero amount of desire to become an amateur hematologist through taste, and so Patton was incredibly scrupulous about brushing his teeth after consuming the blood he’d procured through a source of his in blood donation.
Patton tastes of peppermint now, and Logan sighs into the kiss, lips parting, and he feels the slightest, teasing pinprick of fangs against that sends a thrill zipping down his spine, and—
“And that’s our cue to leave!” Roman bellows with good humor; Logan turns to scowl at him over his shoulder anyways.
“Oh, you don’t have to—” Patton begins, brow creasing ever so slightly.
“Yeah, we do,” Virgil says, an edge of a laugh in his voice. ��Besides, us humans have to sleep.”
Patton usually forgets about this; he doesn’t necessarily need to sleep, but he can. Logan knows of at least three decade-long naps that Patton’s taken; he has next to no memories of the foundation of the United States, because he was snoozing for the vast majority of the buildup to the Revolutionary War and the establishment of the government afterwards.
He is, though, content to lie in a bed he’d bought for Logan’s use as Logan dozes throughout the night; sometimes Logan wakes up to Patton propped up on an elbow, looking at him with an expression in his eyes that is a bizarre mixture of fondness and jealousy.
Patton nods and says wisely, “Or else Santa won’t come to your house.”
Virgil snorts, “Yeah, that’s why.”
“I’ll have you know that Nikolass’ a close personal friend of mine,” Patton sniffs, “and it is a very long way from Gemile.”
“North Pole,” Virgil corrects. “Santa lives at the North Pole.”
“Mm,” Patton says neutrally.
“Patton, did you really know St. Nick?” Roman demands.
“No, no, you’re right,” Patton sighs, a glimmer of mischief in his eyes. “Far too late for you mortals. Off to bed, then, and don’t forget to leave him some börek!”
“ Milk and cookies,” Virgil says, he and Roman now wearing twin expressions of desperate curiosity. Logan, who knows when St. Nick supposedly lived, keeps silent.
“He prefers börek,” Patton says, his nose twitching, a telltale sign he’s holding in laughter. “It’s traditional, where he’s from. Leave him a note that old Patton remembers him, it’ll earn you börek points!”
“Brownie points,” Virgil corrects again, “Patton, did you actually know Santa Claus—”
Patton bursts into giggles, unable to hold up the ruse for very long.
“The figure we know today as St. Nicholas of Myra lived in the 300s,” Logan explains. “He predates Patton by thirteen hundred years, approximately.”
“I can’t believe you fell for that!” Patton cackles, eyes bright, making him look as young as his face presents him to be.
“Yeah, okay,” Virgil says, as Patton pulls Roman into a hug, “you say that like it’s entirely unbelievable when you’ve shown us paintings of you and other completely unreal people like Maid Marian—”
“Aw, I miss her,” Patton says.
“— sorry if Santa Claus is too far out of the realm of belief from the vampire, ” Virgil continues to grumble, even as Patton folds him into a hug, too.
“He has also known Marie Curie,” Logan says, still unable to quite believe it even though he’s practically memorized the missives she had sent Patton. “Also, I may have elevated my threshold of belief to include vampires, selkies, sirens, and banshees, but I absolutely will not be budged to start believing in childhood myths.”
He pins Patton with a look. “And I am still unconvinced that you knew Robin Hood.”
“Well, he wasn’t actually called that then — ” Patton begins.
“Nope!” Roman practically yells. “Nope, Logan, you are not going to take the fact that I am one degree separated from the Merry Men, I refuse to listen to you debate this again, Sheriff of Not-letting-Roman-have-this-one-thing-ingham—”
“All of my research suggests the people you knew were imitators—” Logan begins again.
“As a Christmas gift to me, shut up,” Roman says. 
“Roman,” Patton scolds.
“ Please shut up,” Roman amends politely—only his tone is polite, as the words themselves and the eyeroll that accompanies them are not particularly courteous. 
Virgil distracts him quite handily by physically turning Roman around and nudging him toward the door.
Patton follows after them, Logan a few steps behind.
“All right, well, be safe going home,” Patton says, beginning on his spiel as Roman and Virgil pull on gloves and scarves. “Are you calling for a ride?”
“Walking,” Virgil says.
Patton makes a discomfited noise. “In this cold?”
“We barely live three blocks away, Ed-worry Cullen,” Roman says, and flaps his arms to show off his new peacoat, a gift from Janus. “We’re all bundled up.”
“All right, well,” Patton says, clearly still fretting, “Text message me when you get home?”
“Just text works,” Logan murmurs, but he can empathize with Patton’s difficulty with memorizing certain terms; it’s just that Patton’s are mostly technological in nature, and Logan’s are slang. Back when they first met, Patton still had the occasional slip-up and called texts telegrams.  
“Text me,” Patton corrects himself, smiling at Logan and squeezing his hand in silent thanks before turning his attention back to Roman and Virgil.
“We will,” Virgil says, and amends, “or at least, I will,” because Roman was notorious for promising he’d text when he got home only to wake up to fifteen missed calls from Patton because he’d forgotten to do so.
“Good,” Patton says with a sigh of relief, then, “All right, bring it in!”
Logan releases Patton’s hand so Patton can step forward and hug Roman and Virgil simultaneously; Roman pulls a face at him over Patton’s shoulder, likely still stung by Logan’s accurate theory about the validity of the so-called Merry Men Patton had been acquainted with.
Though Logan is the correct one, Patton may believe that those people were the original Robin Hood and his band of thieves, but he was most likely deceived considering the earliest myths of Robin Hood originated two hundred years prior to Patton’s birth, even if Patton protests that the dates of the origin of many myths during his human life are incorrectly cited—
Logan presses his lips together in an expression that is not reciprocating the face that Roman pulled at him. Logan is correct; he can rest easily knowing this. And perhaps Christmas is not the proper time to bring up this oft-rehashed debate.
Even though Logan is right. It should not be oft-rehashed because he is right.
“Merry Christmas, Brainy Swan,” Roman says, stepping forward to give Logan a hug that Logan would describe as brotherly, except he knows Roman’s brother and this is far too tame, even if there is more back-slapping and hair ruffling than Logan would prefer. 
“I am not anything like Isabella Swan,” he begins—this is an oft-rehashed debate, too, but this one is far more teasing in nature; Logan, at least, has the retort of pulling up any image of a particularly hideous mermaid mock-up or ugly fish and showing it to him with the (Virgil-taught) response “This you?”—and Roman rolls his eyes.
“Stop denying the Twilight renaissance, Lucy Weste- nerd -a,” Roman says, and reaches out to pluck at the patched elbow of Logan’s tweed jacket, even as he’s hugging Patton goodbye. “You’re dressed Victorian enough—”
“Patton isn’t anything like Dracula,” Logan disputes this time, because obviously Patton would never drink Logan’s blood or turn him without his consent. He straightens his waistcoat, and is about to reach into his pocket, grab his phone, and show Roman the image of a blobfish he has saved for a special occasion to tell him that this is clearly his long-lost twin, not Remus.
He may or may not have rehearsed this with Virgil to ensure a devastating effect.
“Can we please go before you two spend all of Christmas Eve talking about vampire franchises,” Virgil groans.
“Yeah, as fun as that is, most nights, this is kind of a special night!” Patton says brightly. If it were anyone else, Logan would wonder if he should attempt to scan his tone for sarcasm, but Patton probably does think it’s fun. 
Virgil steps forward to hug Logan next; a one-armed hug around the shoulders, quick. It’s what they’re both best with, really; abrupt, swift affection that can be moved on from in a tidy manner. 
“Merry Christmas, L,” Virgil says, then he steps forward to allow Patton to give him a more substantial hug; Patton wraps his arms around Virgil’s shoulders, squeezing him tight, his eyes shuttering for a brief moment, his face becoming gaunt. 
“Merry Christmas, Pat,” Virgil says in a very quiet voice.
“Merry Christmas, V,” Patton says, his voice equally quiet and a touch strained.
Something deep in Logan aches at the sight of them before the look on Patton’s is wiped clean, so abruptly it’s almost as if Logan’s imagined it, and Patton inhales deeply and lets go of Virgil.
“Text me,” Patton reminds them, as Roman and Virgil step off the front stoop.
“I will,” Virgil promises.
Roman’s face splits into a grin, and he calls back, “Merry Christmas, Elena Gil-boring!”
Logan’s head whips around, and he opens his mouth to respond—he isn’t sure with what— and the world surrounding him spins, and he’s weightless, airborne, and as suddenly as it started, it’s stopped. He sees Patton smile at him before Logan closes his eyes, the world still spinning in a way that is distinctly unpleasant.
“Okay?” Patton asks, gently touching Logan’s shoulder.
“Mm. Dizzy.” Logan takes in a deep breath through his nose—the smoke off the fire, the lingering scents of their dinner and desserts, peppermint—and releases it, shaky, through his mouth, before he chances opening his eyes again.
“Sorry,” Patton says, guilt in his tone.
“It’s all right,” Logan says, and he smirks a little. “I’m sure Roman would have said something to interrupt the Yuletide peace if you hadn’t.”
“Yes, Roman would have,” Patton teases, amused, before he blurs for a moment and comes into focus just as quickly, Logan’s empty mug in his hands, one of his many fluffy blankets over his arm—Patton is almost always eager to use his preternatural speed when they are alone in his home. “Would you like another?”
Logan evaluates it; he does not drink very often, but it is a holiday, and he has eaten a sufficient amount and kept well-hydrated today. Though, he does not usually get too vertiginous when Patton moves him quickly, unless they are moving a great distance, he does have reason to suspect that the alcohol is the reason for it today. He’ll have to mention it to Patton; so long as he avoids that, and keeps it to this last mug, he should not face any unfortunate aftereffects in the morning.
“Yes, please,” he decides.
Patton kisses his temple and casts the blanket in front of the fireplace with great fanfare, fluffing it up so that it is at optimum comfort levels, before he unfolds another with an equal amount of fanfare, wrapping it around Logan’s shoulders. Logan smiles at him in thanks, as he knows the blanket is likely for his benefit—Patton frets about Logan getting too cold when they cuddle due to their disparate temperatures—and there’s a rush of artificial wind as Patton zooms to the kitchen. 
Logan wraps the blanket around himself a little more securely as he settles in front of the fire, taking a moment to adjust the wood with the poker, listening to the popping crackle that allows him to lean back in time to watch the spray of sparks leap up the chimney. There’s the sound of a needle being lifted off a vinyl, the vinyl being replaced, and the needle lowered back down; Patton has switched them to an album of orchestral performances of Christmas songs.
Another rush of wind, then, a soft tap of fingers at the top of his head. Logan tilts his head back to look up at him.
Patton��s smiling down at him, eyes reflecting the last remaining sparks, his dark eyes catching the light like stars. He cradles the mug in his hand, and, despite the great speed at which he had moved, he has not spilled a drop.
“Here you are, love.”
“Thank you, dear,” Logan says, placing the poker back where it’s meant to be before he accepts the mug. Patton takes the time to settle in beside him, setting a tray on the hearth, before he wraps his shoulders in the fluffy blanket, too.
Logan smiles a little at the sight of the tray. One half would pass as a traditional, human charcuterie board, if perhaps a bit heavier on jellies than most. The other half is crowded with sectioned blood oranges, a small bowl of pomegranate seeds, raspberries, cherries, and strawberries, all foods as red as Patton’s punny Christmas sweater. It says Merry Chrismath! on it, with math formulas sketched out to form the shape of a Christmas tree, which Patton had purchased specifically because the corners of Logan’s lips had turned up at the sight of it in the store.
Patton takes a sip from his own mug—from the smell of it, mulled wine—and sighs in satisfaction.
“This feels very human, doesn’t it?” Patton asks Logan, as if he is asking for Logan’s approval, and in all honesty he probably is; Patton has been undead for so long that the memories of his human life are dim and distant. “Sitting in front of the fire, eating snacks. About to cuddle.”
It does feel rather human—all he has to do is pretend that his boyfriend is a red food enthusiast, rather than, for whatever reason, red foods being passable enough to a vampire that they are the only human foods he can stomach. 
He doesn’t waste time pretending, though. Why should he, when his reality is stranger than fiction?
Logan presses his cheek to Patton’s shoulder, for a moment.
“I’m perfectly satisfied with this being a shared vampire-human experience,” Logan says, deliberately misunderstanding why Patton is asking. He likes that Patton is a vampire; it is part of him, it is why they have been able to meet. He does not understand why Patton sometimes seems to act like Logan would prefer a human boyfriend, because he wouldn’t. He prefers Patton.
“Well,” Patton says, his voice almost unbearably soft. “I suppose I’m all right with that too.”
Logan reaches for his own mug and takes a sip, before, once again, pressing his cheek against Patton’s shoulder in a way that presses his hair against Patton’s face.
Patton huffs softly in amusement. “Are you trying to get me to smell you?”
“I find it interesting,” Logan says, and he does; the amount of data Patton can deduce by one smell is absolutely astounding. He has plans for a more specific experiment, which he will ask Patton to conduct on a day he is bored and amenable to such suggestions.
Patton hesitates, just for a little bit, before Logan scoots closer, about to tilt so that some of his more major arteries will be closer to his nose.
“All right, then, for Christmas.”
Patton presses his nose against Logan’s hair, kissing the crown of his head, before he inhales, slowly, curiously, like someone trying to place what’s cooking in a kitchen without being able to see what is being prepared.
“And?” Logan asks.
“Mm,” Patton hums, getting his thoughts in order, before he inhales again, this time as if he is a sommelier inhaling the scent of a fine vintage. “Well, you, my favorite smell in the whole world.”
Logan feels very warm in a way that has nothing to do with the blanket, Patton’s arm around his shoulders, or the fire before them.
“You washed your hair this morning—oh, this is a new shampoo!”
“You didn’t like the other one, you thought it was too chemical-y,” Logan says. “I finished it yesterday.”
“Ooh, thank you,” Patton says. “Not that you didn’t smell lovely without the overtone of whatever phoenix is supposed to smell like, but I like this one much better—ooh, lemongrass? You’re spoiling me.”
Logan grins into Patton’s collarbone; really, only Patton would think that a new shampoo scent was spoiling.
“And the usual soap smell,” Patton says. “Sweat, skin, deodorant, your aftershave. You walked by someone smoking today; tobacco and herbal cigarettes, that’s unusual, those were way more common back in the forties—damiana, blackberry leaf, rose, and,” another inhale, “hibiscus and mullein. Gosh, the thought of those takes me back.”
Logan is about to ask—perhaps a past acquaintance or friend smoked something similar in those days—but Patton moves on without ruminating on it further, which makes Logan feel an odd prick of pride; nostalgia has been one of Patton’s greatest strengths, true, but also one of his greatest downfalls.
“Did you have tacos for lunch yesterday? I can smell the spicy salsa still.”
“You cannot,” Logan says, still stunned, even after years, at the amount of things Patton can detect. He’s probably smelling the capsaicin in his salsa, for one, but Patton can also smell certain chemicals the body produces: illness, for example, but also things like cortisol and oxytocin.
“Mhm, makes my nose itch a little. And I can smell the stuff we had at the party, and for dinner last night and breakfast this morning, so it wouldn’t be as fun for you if I listed that off...” Another inhale. “Oh, and I can tell you’re a little tipsy.”
“I think that’s probably why I got dizzy when you ran with me earlier.”
Patton kisses his forehead as a form of apology. “And. You’re happy.”
Logan pulls back just enough, just so he can look Patton in the eyes. 
There are a great many supposed vampire stories that claim to know the color of a vampire’s eyes; blood red, commonly, but yellow or gold were popular ideas, as well. Silver, sometimes. Almost always, the presumed color was a color not found in nature.
Patton’s eyes are so dark a brown they are practically black, the iris near indistinguishable from his pupil unless someone was shining a direct light at them. They were the same color when he was human, Patton thinks; he has an illustration of his mother hidden away upstairs, and they are identical in shape and shade. They are beautiful, and captivating, and full of the warmth and love that are so perfectly, wonderfully Patton.
“I hope you don’t have to smell me to know that,” Logan says, and then, fumblingly, “I mean—I am aware you can smell my oxytocin, but I hope you know that I am without relying on that sense. That I am happy, I mean. Because I am. I do not tell you how you make me feel enough and I feel the need to do so now and articulate it clearly. You make me incandescently, impeccably happy. I am deeply in love with you. I could not have imagined the way my life is now, but I do not want it any other way, because you have made my life so much better.”
Patton’s expression has softened, his head tilting to the side, his lips tilted up into a smile, his eyes so full of affection that Logan almost has the urge to look away, overwhelmed. But Logan, bolstered by something —the Bailey’s and peppermint schnapps, the Christmas spirit, his own love for Patton, he isn’t sure which or if it’s a combination of all of them—keeps looking at him, savoring the expression, before his hand drifts up to cup Patton’s jaw.
They lean in simultaneously, and Logan’s eyes drift shut as he presses his lips to Patton’s once again; this time, without anyone to watch or heckle, Patton’s soft lips part easily for him, Patton’s fingers tangling in his hair, and Logan shivers a little with pleasure as Patton’s tongue brushes against Logan’s bottom lip. Patton is always, always so intolerably tender with him, so careful and deliberate, as if Logan is something to be savored, something exquisite and vitreous that needs to be handled delicately, something precious.
Logan tries his best to treat him in kind. He touches Patton’s face, Patton’s mouth and lips and tongue, eternally cool to the touch, with the kind of mindfulness he gives to pipettes and microscopes and test tubes, as if touching Patton in a way that is any less than the amount of devotion and love Patton deserves will irrevocably contaminate the results of his hypothesis. 
But then Patton’s tongue brushes against his own, and Logan gasps, and he moves to kiss Patton with the devotion and love and passion that ignites in Logan’s stomach, burning hotter than a Yule log, his heartbeat thudding rapidly in his ears, and Logan presses himself even closer to Patton, so wonderfully chilled to the touch, the only thing that could temper the heat flaring to life in Logan’s stomach to something bearable, the only thing that brings balance, something as undeniably well-paired as the heat source and the heat sink—they bring each other thermodynamic equilibrium, romantic equilibrium, equilibrium in all things—
Patton pulls away, just in time, just as Logan needs to break away to gulp in a breath that Patton does not need to take, and Logan looks at Patton, whose eyes are flaring with their own kind of heat.
“I love you too,” Patton says, and he presses his forehead to Logan’s, inhaling deeply; Logan wonders if his body has started producing dopamine and norepinephrine and serotonin and vasopressin, if Patton can smell it.
“I love you so much,” Patton says again, his voice trembling with the weight of it.
Patton wraps his arms around Logan’s waist, pulling him into his lap, and Logan wraps his arms around him. Patton cuddles closer, rubbing his cheeks against Logan’s hair almost like a cat.
“I love you too,” Logan says, “I love you.”
Patton bundles the blanket around them, the fire crackling and the ebb and flow of string music in the background, and Logan presses a kiss to Patton’s cheek.
“I love you,” Patton repeats.
I love you, I love you, I love you, they whisper at each other, wrapped up in a blanket until the fire sputters down to embers, Patton’s cold skin keeping Logan from overheating, the pair of them exchanging kisses that only slightly tip into overly passionate, always returning to holding each other, cuddling in front of the fire, even as Logan’s eyelids slip lower and lower as the moon rises higher and higher in the sky, so comfortable and so adored and so absolutely, completely sated that he cannot help but drift off in the comfort of it, one thing ringing in his ears that carries him off to a deep, dreamless sleep.
I love you, I love you, I love you.
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vampcubus · 5 years
Text
Quiet (Midoriya/Reader) [part 2]
| A/n: I have to admit, I re-wrote the ending several times and I’m still not satisfied with it but here we go anyways! |
| See part 1 ... here |
✦✿  Warnings: Angst with a happy ending. ✿✦
✦✿ Words: 5500+ ✿✦
are you guys ready to c r y??
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You stare blankly at a red and purple sky, eyes lazily watching the clouds roll by and the half-visible sun dip down and slowly set. You leaned forward to capture that perfect in-between moment, smiling as the last sliver of the sun finally dipped behind the horizon, letting the sky gradually shift from warm pinks and oranges to dark blues, indigos, and purples. You sighed and sank into a more relaxed position as your eyes welcomed the appearance of the moon as it took to the sky, washing the park in its gentle white light.
You sat at the same rotting-wooden picnic table you sat at every night, a familiar book with kitty skeletons draped in red and black across the cover sat just beneath your hand. The lukewarm coffee you’d picked up hours earlier sat right next to the book, half-empty from your lack of interest despite it being your favorite kind. 
You’d even considered dropping by your dorm to throw it in the freezer—to beat yourself with later if you kept thinking about a particularly annoying green-haired boy—before coming here, but you found that you just didn’t want to be on campus more than you had to.
Being out and about decreased your chances of running into him.
You let your eyes stray from the steadily appearing stars and to your right, where Midoriya had sat just a few nights ago.
You let out a frustrated sigh, turning your gaze back up to the sky and raising the cup of coffee to your lips. It didn’t taste amazing right now, but it served as a good enough distraction to stop thinking about him. You’d done the right thing, whether you cared about Midoriya or not, you wouldn’t let yourself be manipulated. You would not come running back into his arms only to be forgotten when other things in his life became more important than you again.
It was better this way. 
You told yourself, trying to convince yourself that you would only distract Izuku from his dreams. You’d only get in the way and end up broken again when he realized that.
You flicked the book open and skimmed your eyes over the pages. The illustrations of grim-themed yet still cute cats above each new chapter momentarily consuming your attention. Your soft smile faltered when you stumbled upon a particularly strange looking cat with wild, curly fur and huge round eyes cowering underneath a couch. Your eyes lingered on the drawing, everything about it just screams Izuku.
You shake yourself out of it and flip to the front page, breath hitching when you noticed a sticky note attached to it. It was in the handwriting of the clerk you’d grown familiar with. She often scribbled funny quotes or little notes things into the books you purchased for you to laugh about when you stumbled into the shop again.
He was here today, wanted me to slide this to you once you came in today. Not quite sure if he knows that ‘secret admirers’ are supposed to be discreet? 
-Kiko ッ
You almost smile at that, not doubting for a moment who she was referring to. But then you knit your brows together in confusion when you noticed an arrow at the bottom of the note. Curiously, you unstuck the unusually heavy sticky note and flipped it. Your heart stopped functioning entirely when you saw a familiar bracelet taped to the back of it.
You gasped tearing the bracelet from the note and inspecting it closely. No way… there’s no way he even remembered this existed.
It was a colorful and cute bracelet with mostly green beads and white lettered ones spelling out ‘All Might.’
The sight of the bracelet brings you way back, and suddenly you are no longer outside at the park.
Instead, you are laying on your stomach with an impressive fort of blankets hanging above your head. Your small hands fiddled with the beads, tiny fingers slipping on each random-shaped bead you could find in your craft box that was remotely green in color. Across from you lays a much smaller Izuku on his belly with his nose buried in a comic book, eyes sparkling and lips noisily slurping at the straw of a juice box.
“Y/N-chan look!” The curly-haired boy squeals, shoving the comic book over to you and pointing at a panel of a very stylized All Might with multiple civilians draped over his shoulders. It’s a familiar frame from the video you’ve watched with the boy about a million times already. You personally didn’t idolize the symbol of peace as passionately as your friend, but it always made him happy, so you always watched it with him. You squinted, scrunching up your nose at the picture.
“They drew his hair wrong!” You complained pointing at the clearly exaggerated shojo-looking hairstyle the number one hero had been illustrated with.
“No, that’s just the artists’ style.” Little Izuku exclaims, standing up in the fort, proudly posing in his All Might one-sie, holding the comic book up into the air like it was Simba.
“Ohh,” You remember humming thoughtfully before returning to tying an s-clip to the end of the bracelet, looking your newest creation over with pride. You sat up too, looking anxiously over to your best friend who had engrossed himself back into the comic. “Gimme your hand.”
You vividly remember the young boy’s freckled face lighting up and his hand being shoved in your direction. You slid the way-too-big bracelet over his tiny wrist and looped it around a second time so it wouldn’t fall off. “Here, so everybody knows you’re the next All Might!”
His big green eyes overflowed with tears, almost flooding your blanket sanctuary and drowning you both in his own tears when he tackled you to the ground, hugging you tight. You remember him showing the bracelet off to all of his friends and Kacchan the next day. He wore it even more religiously than his hero-onesie, his mother even mentioning that he only took it off to bathe.
You recall your shock when a week later he dropped a similar home-made bracelet with your favorite-colored beads and your idolized hero’s name on it. It had been the first time anyone had ever made something for you and you cherished it.
“We match now, so that means we gotta become big strong heroes together when we get big!” You remember his high-pitched voice declaring with his best All Might impression.
You felt your eyes burn with salt and the telltale weight of tears welling up in the corners of your eyes, your fingers shaking as they clutched the bracelet. Despite how old the plastic piece of jewelry was, it was in outstanding condition--save for a few scratches on the bigger beads here and there.
You’d thought that he’d lost it or thrown it away a long time ago. It’s been years. How on earth did he still have this?
Feeling your breath start to quicken you shot up from your seat, grabbing the book from the table and dashing off towards U.A. You turned each sharp corner, narrowly avoiding crashing into several other students—including Bakugou who hissed and swore at you as you retreated to your dorm You shoved the door open and slammed it shut. The next fifteen minutes were spent digging through your stuff, looking through untouched boxes of your things you’d brought from home but never needed until now. 
And then, you finally found it tucked away in an old pencil pouch. You pulled out an all-too-familiar bracelet, holding it up to compare to the green one in your other hand. There was no doubt about it, it was real. Your fingertips traced the familiar beads of your own bracelet, eyes flickering between it and its counterpart.
Why…?
Why did he keep it so long?
You kicked the box back into the closet and toed the door shut, tossing both bracelets onto your nightstand and flopping face-down onto your bed.
It didn’t matter. It was just a bracelet, nothing more than a flimsy piece of plastic. Nothing compared to the friendship you had. So what if he held onto some dumb bracelet? That didn’t make up for months of distance, weeks of him slowly forgetting you existed while you stood idly by. Letting it happen because you cared too much.
So why did you feel so guilty?
You groaned exasperatedly into your pillow snuggling your face into it when it started to soothe your headache. Your eyes opened suddenly with a furious glower when your stupid brain immediately thought back to the times you and Izuku would nap together when you were kids, anywhere anytime. You often played so hard you knocked yourselves out so his mom would find you cuddled up against one another in your blanket forts, on the couch, on the slide at the park, under the sink once… anywhere you could fit into and doze off, you would.
In fact, you didn’t shake the habit of napping together until you were at least thirteen, which is usually around when parents start getting suspicious so you stopped doing it. You felt a slight blush rise to your cheeks, remembering those special times in middle school when you would sneak in and sleep together for a while if one of you had a nightmare. That was most likely the most rebellious thing you two innocent little suck-ups ever did.
You sigh, eyes drifting over to the bracelets strewn carelessly across your nightstand.
How can one bracelet bring back so much nostalgia?
.   .   .
Midoriya was slumped miserably against one of the couches in the dorm lounge, pen shakily scribbling away at an assignment. His handwriting has gotten a little better since last year, still wobbly and inconsistent in places but his teachers have voiced their appreciation of its improvement. He thinks back to earlier when he had dropped off that bracelet at the bookshop, afraid that if he approached you, you wouldn’t want to see him or he’d start crying again.
It really tore him apart inside to part with it, having kept it for so long. He’d found the bracelet while looking through some of his things one day. It fell out of a box with a bunch of his older more beat up action figures.
Seeing it after being put away for so long had brought the biggest smile to his face, remembering how much he’d loved it when he was younger. It was also what made him remember you… It was as if you suddenly popped back into existence. And in excitement to share the memory with you, perhaps catch up with you over coffee, he had disregarded the fact that it had been months since you’d last spoken.
He now realizes his mistake. 
But after last night he knew he didn’t deserve to have such an important piece of you to himself. He absentmindedly wondered if you still had yours… probably not, huh? His wasn’t as pretty as the one you made him, and why would you keep it after he practically ignored you for a year?
Still, he had hope that just maybe there was a chance he could make it up to you, that he hadn’t messed up so bad that you never want to speak to him again. Midoriya closed his eyes, frowning down at his notebook in shame. Who was he kidding? It was just a piece of plastic and likely held no value to you after what he did.
He misses it. Already.
“Midoriya.” Iida’s voice piped up and the green-haired boy jumped.
“Oh hey, Iida. Did you need something?” He asked, trying not to sound as worked up as he really was, forcing a small smile.
“I came to ask if you’d heard from L/N at all today?” Midoriya’s heart dropped at the sound of your name.
“No… why?”
“Well, it’s just that several students claimed to have seen her running obnoxiously through the halls earlier this evening and I was curious if you’d happen to know anything about it?” Iida asks, straightening his glasses with a displeased expression, clearly not amused by your behavior.
“No, I haven’t. Sorry,” Midoriya admitted sullenly, eyes downcast to the floor.
Iida’s eyes softened and the bluenette sighed, taking a seat next to his friend. Ochako and he hadn’t managed to get much out of the sulking Midoriya since the other night, but they suspect that things didn’t necessarily go well between him and you. Not to mention he’s been a zombie all for days, barely getting any sleep at all these past few nights
“And, as your friend, I am concerned about your wellbeing,” Tenya confessed, pushing his glasses up closer against his face as Midoriya sighed. 
“I’m fine, Iida.” Midoriya offered him a half-smile but otherwise made no attempt to spill anything. Tenya made eye-contact with Ochako across the common room, who had been the one to encourage him to approach Deku in the first place.
“Midoriya, what happened between you and L/N last evening?” The Iida son pressed, cautious not to pry too much in fear of upsetting him.
“I messed up,” Midoriya looked down at his lap, a drawing of your face in the corner of his math homework. He abruptly turned the page in hopes Iida hadn’t already seen it. “Really badly.”
.   .   .
The next morning, Izuku is as sluggish and mopey as ever, worrying his classmates with his lack of enthusiasm.
“You should talk to her.” Todoroki’s cool voice shakes Midoirya out of his daze after homeroom. He’s been staring absently at you as you ignored his existence, focusing on the lesson. It isn’t hard to guess who the half-and-half teen was talking about. And yet he still found himself surprised.
“I’ve tried, Todoroki. Talking won't help.” Midoriya sighs, eyes dropping to his mess of notes, including several crumpled up drawings of you.
“And sulking around doing nothing will?” Todoroki questions, not able to recognize the shell of the boy in front of him.
 “I messed up, and she wants nothing to do with me now.” And he respects that.
“Something tells me that isn’t entirely the case.” Shouto replies and the green-haired boy sends him a puzzled look.
“What do you mean by that?” He asks, a brow raised at the possibility that Todoroki knows something he doesn’t.
“You forget that Y/N and I are close friends now, although you haven’t necessarily been around so you may not have known at all.” He states bluntly and it does nothing to comfort Midoriya at all. He hadn’t known you and Todoroki were friends! What else did he not know about you?
“What are you getting at, Todoroki?” Deku asks with a defeated tone, wishing the stoic prodigy would just be out with it.
“Y/N tells me everything, don’t think she hasn’t told me about what happened a few nights ago. But when she spoke about you it didn’t seem like she didn’t want anything to do with you.” Shouto explained, definitely catching the young Midoriya’s attention. “She’s upset, yes, and you aren’t wrong to assume that she is angry with you right now. But the longer you wait to talk to her about it—if you planned to at all that is—the longer it will take for her to forgive you.”
Forgive him? Was that even possible at this point? He didn’t know, but if what Todoroki said was true, and he actually had a chance, he couldn’t waste any more time ‘sulking around and doing nothing.’
“Are you sure that’s even possible, Todoroki?” Deku questioned, eyes adept as ever as he searched the bi-colored eyes of his rival and friend for answers he may not even have.
“I don’t know for sure, Midoriya. That is up to Y/N.” Todoroki admits, and Deku bites the inside of his cheek still torn over this. “But I don’t think she will forgive you if you don’t try.”
“Mm.” Deku nods, thanking the two-toned boy and packing up for his next class of the day.
.   .   .
Your ears perked up at the sound of someone knocking on your door later that night. You sighed into your pillow, not wanting to leave its soft embrace. You tried to ignore it at first, pretending to be asleep but he insistent knocking continued. Grumpily you pushed off of your comfy bed to sluggishly open the door, thinking it was most likely Mina and she’d just keep knocking until you opened up. 
You were not expecting Midoriya to be standing there.
“What do you want?” You asked, your voice holding no softness or enthusiasm ad your narrowed eyes stared coldly at your former best friend. He flinches at the icy tone of your voice.
“I-I um… can we… talk?” Izuku asks anxiously, wringing his hands together, elbows drawn in close to his stomach self-consciously. “Please?”
He meets your steeled gaze with his own apologetic one, green eyes pleading with yours. Izuku owned the most convincing pair of puppy-dog eyes you’ve ever seen, even when he wasn’t meaning to and even now you faltered.
“Why? Why should I let you in? Give me one good reason not to slam the door in your face and go back to bed?”
“B-because I w-won’t leave until I say what I need to say,” Midoriya stated as firmly as he could, a determined glimmer in his eyes as he did so. You don’t doubt that he might sit at your door all night if you refused him. “A-and I have a feeling you have some things to say too.”
He wants to resolve this.
“I have nothing to say to you.” You hissed stepping back into the threshold of your room starting to close the door but his hand smacks against the wooden surface, a desperate look in his eyes that only makes you push harder. “Move.”
“Please! Please just hear me out, Y/N, please just give me this! Let me try! You don’t need to forgive me. I just need you to listen!” Midoriya pleads, his glossy eyes already spilling hot tears down his freckled cheeks. He’s shaking. “Please…”
Midoriya stumbles forward when the door opens and he just barely catches himself, wide eyes darting up to yours as you take several steps away from the entrance. You cross your arms, you can’t believe you’re actually doing this.
“You have five minutes. Start talking.” You relent, sitting down on your bed.
Midoriya sighs in relief, closing the door behind him before clumsily scrambling over to you. You pat the spot next to you, avoiding any and all eye-contact. Izuku’s heart skips a beat when he spots his bracelet on your nightstand. So you did get it! His breath gets caught in his throat when he tries to speak at the same moment his eyes drift to your wrist, where a relic of your friendship dangles. 
You kept it! He feels his eyes overflowing, the ugly fat tears streaking down the sides of his face as he stares dumbfounded at the familiar bracelet.
“You have four minutes.” You flatly remind him, and he jumps, trying to think of the words he’d practiced just a half-hour before he showed up at your dorm.
“AH—o-okay! um, I…” When he fails to speak even after a good minute passes, you sigh deeply. If he had nothing to say, why’d he even come? What happened to all that gusto about ‘saying what I need to say’?
“Why did you keep it?” You ask out of the blue after an uncomfortable silence and his head perks up, but he looks confused, eyes searching yours.
“Keep what—?” He starts, but you cut him off.
“The bracelet. Why did you keep it? It’s been years, I didn’t even think you still remembered that old piece of junk existed.” You blurt out, each word sounding distressed and just… confused. You wanted to understand.
He stares at you, mouth agape at a complete loss of what to say. His mouth suddenly feels dry and his tongue rubs anxiously against the roof of his mouth.
“Because… because it was important... to me.” Izuku breathes, the muscles and nerves in his hand twitching as it laid only inches away from yours. “I was s-so happy when you first gave it to me, my mom had to pry it off of me just to bathe me.” He chuckles, smiling at the memory.
“And I kept it because it reminded me of you, it felt like there was a part of you with me even when you couldn’t be there. It comforted me, knowing that you put s-so m-much thought into something j-just for me and I f-felt so special!” He breaks off when his hiccups start to get out of control. “A-and—”
He chokes and apologizes taking a moment to breathe again. You hadn’t realized how much one silly piece of jewelry had impacted him until now, so much so that he’s crying over it.
“And I made a promise, remember?” Izuku sniffs, wiping his eyes uselessly with his hand, only really smearing the wetness across his cheeks and wetting his hand with his own tears as they continued to spill down the freckled planes of his red cheeks.
You nod, but turn away when you feel your own emotions starting to spike up. You bit your lip, held your breath, clenched your teeth. Anything to keep the tears at bay as they threatened to fall.
“I-I said that when we—”
“We match now, so that means we gotta become big strong heroes together when we get big.” You butt in, sniffling and raising a hand to scrub at the tears streaming down your face and pooling at your chin. “That’s what you said.”
Deku stares at you, guffawed as you quoted his younger self. He hadn’t expected you to remember it so clearly, It makes him feel even worse. Knowing how much it must’ve hurt you when you grew apart. How hard it must’ve been on you to keep quiet about everything while he lived his best life, forgetting all about his dearest friend.
“Why’d you give it back?” You asked, voice trembling as you wiping your eyes with your arm. You glanced over at the green bracelet lying on your nightstand. “If it meant so much to you, why give it back?”
He closed his eyes. He listened to his heart as it slammed against his chest like a pinball machine, demanding him to say something.
“Because I forgot about the friendship it represented, and I shouldn’t have. I wish I wouldn’t have, but I did. I broke my own promise and e-even worse, I hurt you because I was just too caught up in my own problems—my own dreams—to remember that you’ve been a part of them since the beginning.” Izuku sobbed, there was no point in holding it all in now. 
“I gave it back because I was so afraid I screwed up everything between us, and I don’t deserve it!”
I don’t deserve you. The phrase rang in his ears so loudly it was almost deafening, he wanted nothing more than to say it too. He couldn’t because he couldn’t catch a single damn breath to say it. But even as he feels he has gathered that breath it’s stolen away once more when he feels your hands on his face.
In a flurry of your own emotions and a nagging force of habit you had reached out and grasped his face, the soft pads of your thumbs wiping at his cheeks.
“Stop crying already, you had something you wanted to say right? Stop letting your emotions get in the way of that.”
The firmness in your tone as your stern eyes descended upon his own struck a chord in him. You’ve said something like that to him before. Years ago.
“Stop crying, Izuku! Stop letting your emotions keep you from standing up for yourself! Kacchan steps on you because he knows all you’ll do is cry!”
Multiple times.
“Would ya quit crying already? You’re tougher than that, Izu. Like All Might!”
Constantly.
“Stop crying because you don’t have a quirk! Become a hero without one!”
It had always been you. You there comforting him, encouraging him, telling him to quit crying and speak up for himself. To keep pushing on despite the fact that he just wasn’t as gifted as other children. How could he have forgotten one of the most important lessons you ever taught him? How could he have forgotten about you?
You tugged one of your bunched sleeves down with your teeth and dried up the downpour of tears from his cheeks with your hoodie sleeve. Careful not to rub the skin raw, you kept at it until he was simply too shocked to cry anymore. This is the first time you’ve done this in years, yet far from the first time you’ve had to do it at all. Even as children, you were using your fingers, your sleeves, the edge of your shirt to wipe his tears away.
“I—”
“Shush, I don’t want to hear it unless it’s what you came here to say.” You interrupt, and the look in his eyes changes from nervous to determined.
“I was going to say that I am s-sorry,” He stutters.
“What else?” You encouraged, watching as he slowly gained more confidence. “You said you weren’t going to leave until you say what you need to say, keep your promise.”
“I was going to say that I don’t deserve you!”
“And are you lying?” You ask.
“No!” Midoriya exclaims more confidently, more certain of himself than before.
“And is that all you wanted to say?” You asked again, smiling as the sobbing boy from before completely changed with your encouragement, egging him on.
“No…” Midoriya confesses, faltering slightly as his nervousness returns. He doesn’t know if he’s ready to say it yet. Would that even be acceptable right now? Even as strong as he feels right now he can’t help but hesitate, to blush, to avoid your gaze.
“Then say it.” 
“I…” He trails off, suddenly terrified of the thought. He couldn’t! It would put everything on the line! “I-I…”
Your hand cups his cheek coaxing him to look back up at you.
“Stop hesitating, tell me what you want to say.”
He’s already put your friendship on the line, what difference would it make? You wanted the truth so you’d get it! He takes a deep breath, closing his eyes before opening them again, meeting your own straight on. There’s a spark in those green eyes that wasn’t there before he squinted them shut. It’s like an emerald fire was lit behind them.
“I love you!”
It’s quiet.
You stare at him, and he stares right back, his determined gaze never weakening as he maintained eye-contact.
“You what?”
“You heard me,” Midoriya replies.
This time it’s your turn to shy away. Your face darkens incredibly fast, heart racing against your chest as your eyes darted from side to side, deep in thought. Your mind threw numbers together into every equation it knew, each answer coming out the same. You had expected an “I want to be friends again!” or “I want a second chance!” or “I want to fix this!”
Never in a million years could you have predicted him to say that. Not to you. Your eyes drifted back up to his. He looks a little less confident now, almost worried as he awaits your response.
“Get out.” You breathe, eyes wide as you stare at him watching his determined face change to one of confusion.
You couldn’t believe it. After forgetting your existence for almost a year, after only remembering when he found the bracelet, after only wanting to talk to you because it was most convenient to him… and he has the goddamn nerve to say that he loved you.
“W-what?” Izuku gasped, not understanding what was going on. Suddenly you were pressing yourself against the wall farthest from him on your bed.
“G-get out!” You exclaim, the angry tears running down your face.
“Y/N, what are you s-saying?” His voice shook, the tears starting to fall from his eyes again, his nose beginning to run as well as his entire body shook. Why were you telling him to leave? Did he make the wrong call? Did you not feel the same?
“Why are you lying to me?” You asked, the question coming out like a whisper.
“I-I’m not lying to you, I love you!” Midoriya cried. “Please, you have to believe me, I wouldn’t lie to you! I’ve always liked you—since we were kids, Y/N! I can’t fake that! You know I can’t!”
You shake as his desperate green eyes plead with yours, a sincerity in those irises you grew up staring into, a sincerity that just can’t be faked. He actually… he actually loved you? But why? He ignored you for a year!
“And you can honestly tell me that in that year you forgot about me you loved me?!” You demanded, your tears making your vision blurry and unmanageable.
“I never stopped loving you, even if it was overshadowed by my dream to become a hero, even if I made mistakes not even I can fix, my heart always belonged to you.” Midoriya crawled over to kneel in front of you on your bed where you still had your back pressed to the wall and your knees pulled tightly to your chest. “I’m not perfect, Y/N. I made a mistake by not being there for you, and I will do anything it takes to fix it if I can.”
“And you won’t forget me again? You promise?” You ask shakily, feeling a little embarrassed by how small you felt, scrunched up in such a way and crying in front of someone other than your cat at home.
“Yes,” His immediate response confirms it, not an ounce of hesitation present in the way it rolls off his tongue. “I promise, I’ll never forget you. And I’ll never be the reason you cry again.”
“Can you believe me?” Izuku reached his hand out to you.
“I… I believe you.” You admit, a small smile gracing your lips as you take his hand. Izuku lets out a relieved sigh, his free hand trembling over his heart. You can tell how terrified he was. “This doesn’t mean I forgive you though, Izu.”
“I know, and I’m going to try my very best to make it up to you. I promise.” Izuku states. It doesn’t bother him that you didn’t say ‘I love you’ back, he wouldn’t have deserved it. He’s going to have to work for it, and that was fine with him.
“Do you…” You started, face flushing and eyes avoiding his as you removed your hands from his face. “Do you wanna hug it out?”
“Yes!” You yelp when he throws himself at you, tackling you to the bed with his arms around you. You squeeze your own arms around him, face burrowing into his shoulder as you squeezed the life out of one another.
“Sorry.” He mutters when he realizes he’s practically on top of you and most likely crushing you. He moves to roll off of you but your arms only tighten around him.
“No, please just… can we just stay like this for a while?” You asked, and Izuku felt his heart beating so fast he was convinced it eventually just commit seppuku if it pounded any harder. He nodded against your shoulder, cheeks burning a bright crimson as he relaxes.
“Also,” You spoke up and he hummed in response, he couldn’t be bothered to move. You reached over to your nightstand to snatch the green bracelet from it, the green-haired boy whining when he had to re-adjust after you started moving. “Gimme your hand.”
He pulled away, green pools swirling with confusion. He complies with your sudden request and gasps when you slide the bracelet back onto his wrist.
“This belongs to you.” You smiled and he mirrored it with one of his own, hand impulsively taking yours, fingers intertwining with your own. Your matching bracelets reflected the dim light of the room, casting a warm glow over your faces as you smiled at each other. No longer did you feel forgotten or used, instead you felt loved again. “Now get off  me.”
Izuku laughs and slips off of you to lay at your side, his arms pulling you in close so he could cuddle you, just like you did when you were kids.
Izuku rested his forehead against yours, one hand reaching up to timidly brush against your reddened cheek, causing your eyes to flutter closed and a small sigh to escape your smiling lips. He missed seeing you smile. But there was still something else that he needed to take care of before you drifted off to sleep.
“Y/N?” He asked.
“Yes?” You sighed sleepily, 
“Don’t ever feel like you have to keep quiet anymore, alright? Please, always talk to me.”
You blinked, your mouth opening and closing several times.
“Okay.”
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keii · 3 years
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Random long update post about my life i guess? LOL
Been enjoying messing with tamagotchis lately!!! I’ve always wanted ones with a colored screen, so I caved and bought some Tamagotchi On and it’s SO fun! Like, I just play with a lil pixel friend and can marry them off. It’s a commitment, but also, easy to just take a breather from my day to see how they’re doing and then continue working on whatever I was doing. I also downloaded the MyMeets thing bc I kinda want to try and make my own pixel bg bc wouldn’t that be cute??? Would also want to commission Poo for one as well bc I always liked their pixel works. I’ve also wanted a Sanrio Meets one, but they’re SO expensive, so I’m going to wait a bit before buying one. I really want to marry Sanrio meets tamas to my On and I think it would be cute to see. The blue one is technically my fiances (though I’m the one that mostly looks out for it) and the other one is mine. I named my first tama child Denjitchi, after Denji from Chainsaw Man bc I read that a couple weeks back and FELL IN LOVE. I really love the characters and world, and it’s how I felt with Dorohedoro, where the world seems so dire? But the character relationships are so fun and you get attached to so many. I also really love how it’s violent, but also fun??? Not only that but the concept fo their abilities are weird in a cool way, the devils are kinda freaky too and I love that. Also love the entrance of the Darkness Devil and the name itself made me laugh bc u know. LMAO-- I like the sense of dark humor it has. After that, I made sure to preorder both Denji and Power nendoroids bc I love their relationship the most! I wonder if there’s gonna be a part 2... I need it, after the heartbreak I experienced with Aki...
I also figured out how to buy nijisanji goods, so I caved and bought chronoir kuma rubber charms and they’re so cute, I don’t want to take em out of their plastic-- I have no idea where I want to hang these either bc I don’t want them to get dirty or lost bc they’re expensive. I also preordered two Kuzuha nendoroids from different sites (bc they have different preorder bonus LMFAO) along with Himawari nendo bc I like her too and I swear nendos NEVER really caught my attention before, but for SOME REASON goodsmile started coming out with REALLY good ones that appealed to me and now I find myself wanting a new one every month??? Smh, calm down!! Anyway, Idk why I like vtubers-- something about watching someone with a cute anime avatar just doing something so mundane such as playing video games or singing is a nice comfort to me ever since quarantine happened. Like not only that, but all the Holostar goods I ordered months ago are all finally being shipped and idk where the heck I’m gonna put those either LMAO.
Hmm what else, in February, I got a instax printer thingy and I’m having fun testing out how my art works look on it! I think it would be cute to make personalize polaroid pics for others too as a commission, though I’m a lil hesitant atm because it’s kind of hard to not have the colors too washed out. When I was testing it on Kii, I had to bring the brightness down along with increasing the saturation and contrast just so that his colors wouldn’t be so washed out! 
Besides talking to close friends, I’ve been keeping mostly to myself on social media, not even posting art everyday, which is nice, but also social media has skewed my relationship with art where if I’m not posting it, then I’m just wasting time. I’m still trying to get over the fact that I’m not just an artist and that I’m allowed to venture out into new things and work on projects myself without having to post every single detail about it on the internet. Every since I graduated university, I shifted from just drawing all the time to having more time to find more interests outside of art. Sushi and Poo convinced me to do journaling as well, so I started that in February and it’s been fun to write down unfiltered thoughts, even though it’s a mess, along with making random spreads. I enjoy being able to still be creative without having to post it, you know? I’m still trying to find my flow when it comes to balancing commissions and my own projects and interests-- I have to keep myself accountable with my own schedule.
There are so many things I want to do, but it’s easy to feel so overwhelmed that I end up not doing any of it at all and reverting back to whatever I’ve always done. I enjoy immersing myself in my work, my projects, my interests. I want to do that, but at the same time I do need to be active on social media from time to time because I still need to do commissions. I like sharing my work to have that connection with others, I just don’t like the pressure of trying to upkeep an audience or anything that social media culture pushes onto people. I guess that’s why I still like tumblr because I can just post whatever and not care too much lol. That’s all I can think of from the top of my head in this convoluted, messy, post about my life (I say this as if it's not some essay or some shit lmao). Nothing really eventful tbh??? Just been doing my own thing and then I would have weekly voice calls with Sushi and Poo and then catch up to other friends once or twice a month.
Hope everyone else is doing well~
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hjh-ceilo-monster · 3 years
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Dear letter... To you... (KTH)
Summary : There was no connection between these two strangers accept a letter in one’s hand.  
Story inspo : a story from a wedding
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Author POV.
*click*
The camera captured the scene of an empty alley. It was just another ordinary day for everyone to wake up and start their routines. In this little town, almost everyone knew each other-despite a few unfamiliar faces who might appear around the street.
Kim Taehyung was one of them, a wanderlust soul. He found this little town not long ago on a travel site. Visiting this beautiful and classic area for a week, he could tell that he fell in love, even if; there was nothing much to attract a large group of tourists.
*click*
Taehyung snapped another shot. This place was nothing but calming for him. He took a turn at a random corner and met with a local restaurant. Taehyung opened the wooden door. The bell shimmed as a signal of a new customer.
“Good day sir, what would you like to order?” Taehyung looked above the waiter for a menu.
“Any tradition dishes?” Taehyung asked. Every dish seemed to look the same since there were no note up on the board.
After having description from the waiter, he decided his dish. A waitress, who finished preparing a table, gestured Taehyung to take a seat.
“What would you like for today?” 
The door opened and closed from time to time. Taehyung was still in the restaurant and enjoyed his meal. He looked through a photo album. He was so busy with his camera without noticing that someone approached him.
“Sir, can this lady have a seat here? The restaurant has no seats available at the moment.” The waitress interrupted him. Taehyung didn’t look up, but nodded as an answer.
— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —
Taehyung POV.
I felt like I was acting rude. However, I didn’t know how to start a conversation with the stranger either. I sat in silence and continued to play with my camera-taking the picture of the lake outside the window.
A glance at the person, but I only met a journal book. The person behind the book was so focused on the paper. Drawing or writing? I looked at the actions and kept those questions in my head.
I then put my attention back into my camera. I snapped a few shots and checked them. I did it again and again like a loop, not caring for the stranger who sat opposite me.
And both of us continued sitting there in silence.
“Have a good day miss.” 
I looked up and met with an empty seat. The loud bell sound then appeared out of nowhere. I assumed that might come from a clock tower nearby. I checked my watch and gasped.
“I’ve been here for hour and a half already?” I started packing my camera and some postcards that I didn’t finish writing.
The moment I stood up and stepped toward the door, one of the waiters stopped me. He handed me a piece of brown ripped paper and a postcard.
“These aren’t mine.”
“It was on your table, sir.” I didn’t care about it that much and put both into my pocket.
  ‘What a tiring day.’ I thought to myself. I strolled down the eat part of the town today. The beach was nice. I could feel the breeze wash over me and left a fresh sea salt scent.
“What could it be?” I picked up the thing I got in the morning. Inspecting the handwriting, it must belong to that stranger. She surely had a neat yet unique handwriting. I assumed these were a part of her journal.
There were a few translucent color dots on a paper. She spilled something? She painted? I flipped the paper and searched for any clue to find her. Fortunately, there was something.
“Interesting.”
— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —
Author POV.
2 years later
“Any meeting?” Taehyung asked his secretary to check his schedule. He had been busy for awhile after his father stepped down from the position.
“Sir, you have a meeting around…” His secretary reviewed his schedule.
“For the project, we have an appointment with the artist in the evening.”
The secretary closed her iPad and left him in the elevator. Taehyung went up to another floor before he left. He then stepped into his office.
  “Sir, the artist arrived.”
After he ended the call, he stepped into a metal box. The door closed and the digital screen ran a set of numbers as he went down.
“Here is the copy of their plan.” Taehyung received the file and scrolled through the plan. Checking the details, he decided to wait for their presentation.
Everyone stood up and bowed to him as a greeting when the glass door slid open. He took a seat and the others followed.
“Shall we start?”  When he asked, a woman stood up from her seat. She walked toward the screen that had already prepared the presentation.
— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —
Y/N POV.
‘Here we go.’ I thought to myself and the glass door slid open.
The CEO stepped inside the room. His every step echoed in the room-making my heartbeat went faster. When we all took our seats, I then noticed his feature. He looked young, probably around my age. His posture was calm yet intimidate.
“Shall we start?” Ok, y/n, you got this. I stood up with confident. I tried my best to look calm. If anyone could read my thought, they would know how nervous I was.
I started by explaining my inspiration a little bit before moving on to the concept and its details. It was nerve-wracking since the guy stared at me throughout my presentation. I felt him monitoring my moves, and that made me anxious.
“Is there any question?” Now, time to face the real anxiety.
I was right. He then started asking millions of questions about my idea.
  The scribbling sound was loud and clear. I was now sitting in the CEO’s cabinet. He noted down the details while I explained. He dismissed everyone from the meeting half an hour ago since their working hour was end.
“Have we ever met before?” He asked a random question out of the blue.
“I..I don’t think so.” Why did I stutter?
I saw him smiled a little. Did I say something wrong? He knew me before? I was sure that I didn’t meet him before. My forgetful self started recalling his face.
“My secretary will contact you for our next appointment.” I nodded and stood up-ready to leave.
“Oh, can you leave your personal contact?  In case, we have to call you for the urgent work.” I then left him my personal contact and left the place.
— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —
Author POV.
With the contact you left a week ago, Taehyung always messaged you. Even if it was about work, you were a little puzzled. Is it common for that huge interior company to let the boss directly contact any worker (even though you weren’t his employee directly)?
The clock was ticking. The sky gradually changed its shade. Everyone continued working on the job as usual. Taehyung was so busy surfing through the site and gallery of the artist. Lucky that he had his own office because if someone found him smiling like an idiot in front of the screen right now, they would think he was weird.
“I’ll see you soon.” He spoke to himself while looking through your work.
After Taehyung met you, to say Taehyung was head over heal into you wasn’t an exaggerated liar. He was even more obsessed with you when he saw your handwriting. He got his answer that you were ‘that’ stranger.
  “Why are we here today? I thought we are going to work on the project.” You and Taehyung got closer after a week of him messaging to you unstop about work (A/N: *Ahem* work you say?)
“Well, this is also work, is it not?” His boxy smiled plaster his face.
“At the art exhibition?”
“Yeah, because I want learn about them. It can help me better understanding what you are doing and fuse them into my collection as well.”
— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —
Taehyung POV.
‘Is that excuse work?’ I looked at her face. She seemed to not catch my real intention. I still put on my signature innocent smile-using it to persuade her.
“We better to be hurry then. Today we also needed to buy my equipment.” I succeeded. She entered the place without asking any further.
I snapped many shots when we were inside. She was so passionate about the exhibition. I usually preferred a peaceful atmosphere while walking in the exhibition hall. However, the way she kept talking about each piece of art, I didn’t find it annoying or boring.
“You seemed to be into this piece. Do you want it to be the main pantone of your collection?” I got out of my head and nodded. She then chuckled lightly.
‘Ah, I embarrassed myself, didn’t I?’
“Ok, we should leave then.”
  We were here for a few hours now. She was lost in her world. When she picked the colors, she wouldn’t forget to ask for my comment. If I approved, she would be happy. Her eyes glowed thousands of lights. I couldn’t help but stare. She was indeed passionate about our work.
‘Our?’ When I realized that I used that word, I somehow felt a tingle feeling inside.
“We can get out of here soon. Do you think this is enough?” I snapped back to reality. I then met a cart full of art tools.
“I think these will do.” I emphasized the word these to remind her that it was enough.
“Sorry, I picked them for personal purpose as well. Hope you won’t mind.” I gave her a disbelief look while she grinned.
“If you mind, you can cut it from my salary.” She pouted and wheeled the cart.
‘Cute’
— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —
Author POV.
Little by little, you fell for Taehyung. It was a feeling that gradually develop without your notice. By the time you realized it, you had already established your status with him.
“And again, you bring me to somewhere out of our schedule.”
“And you like it as always.” You rolled your eyes and entered the restaurant.
Entering a familiar elegant restaurant, a waitress led you both toward the VIP table. Guess who booked that?
The waiter then approached your table and left the menu on the table. He stood there and waited patiently for your order. You finished ordering your meal in the blink of an eye since you only had one fav dish. However, for Taehyung, it took ages to order.
“Why is it so quiet today?” You asked. You glanced around the floor and saw no one other than your table.
“Oh, I booked the whole floor today.” Taehyung answered it as if it was a normal thing to do.
“You did what?” You looked at the guy with a shocked face. He noticed your expression and chuckled.
— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —
Y/N POV.
This was unbelievable. Why on earth did he need to book the whole floor? I had no idea of what was on his mind. Being close with Taehyung, I learned one thing. That one thing was sometimes you needed no rational thought to do something.
The quiet atmosphere then got replaced when a musician started playing some tunes. The soft melody filled the air.
‘He is up to something?’
I monitored his expressions and actions, but I didn’t get the answer. I couldn’t keep the curiosity any longer. I opened my mouth to fire out the question.
“Please, enjoy the meal.”
‘Lucky you, Tae.’ A waitress interrupted me before I could ask. Both of us started eating our meal.
I felt the meal was more delicious. Is it because of the atmosphere?
— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —
Taehyung POV.
‘Phew she didn’t ask anything yet.’ I thought to myself while eating the meal. Thanks to that waitress, she didn’t get her chance. I didn’t want her to know my surprise just yet.
Curious right?
Today, I booked our favorite restaurant to discuss on the work like always. It looked ordinary until here. Now, the surprise plan will start.
I signaled a waiter who stood beside. He knew that it was the time for the special menu. Waiting for a bit, a box finally landed on the middle of the table.
“Open it.” I ordered her. She gave me a suspiscious look before carefully opened it.
*gasp*
“And that is your answer.” I spoke. I knew what she was about to ask before our meal arrived. 
— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —
Author POV.
“That was such a lovely story. I could see ladies in the venue look jelous at you both.”
Wedding day
The MC spoke. Taehyung give his signature smile. He isn’t shy about it. You can tell that he is bragging your story to the audience.
“And I told her about the letter. I still remembered how she was surprise and then her face flush. It was really cute.” The audience awe at him.
“Ok, we will now moving on to the surprise of tonight.” Taehyung glance at the MC. He remembers that the next thing is throwing the bouquet.
“You didn’t expect it, did you? Since you gave me such a surprise that day, I am going to give you one today.”
You look at your husband who look so lost. You chuckle at his expression before 2 staff step on stage with a gift. They then hand it to him and you wait for his reaction.
“Oh my god.” He looks shock when he tears off a wrapper. It was a sketch of him from the day you met him.
“So is this why you didn’t have any conversation with me or even look at me?” He smirks and teases you.
“There are more.”
The MC now hand him a box which is much smaller than the first gift. He  shakes a few time after recieves them. When he know that isn’t going to help him to guess, he open the bow.
He gasp so do the aucience. His eyes filled up with tears. His hands are shaking. The MC take the little gift out of his hand and show it to the audience. The audience go wild. The cheering and whistling sound echo in the venue. You then grab the mic and speak.
“Congratulation my dear, you are going to be papa.”
Author note : This story was inspired by the story from a wedding of my friend’s cousin. Her cousin met his bride because he found her note. Their story then began. My friend told me the groom’s comment about the bride. “I thought the handwriting was beautiful. When I finally found the owner, she was more beautiful.” It sounded cheesy, but that was their story. I hope you enjoy this one. See you in the next os.
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hood-ex · 5 years
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What DC doesn’t understand is that killing off a character who is bound to come back to life at some point doesn’t make me sad. 
But what would make me sad is if you had Damian Wayne draw up a bunch of art for an art show. And he told his whole family, his friends, and his teammates about it because it’s a distinguishable honor, and he wants them all to come see his art/be proud of him or what have you. 
So Damian’s anxiously hovering around his art, right. He’s looking back and forth between all the doors, watching random people milling about. He’s giving curt nods to people who happen to glance at his work as they walk by. He doesn’t really care about those people though. He’s waiting for someone he knows to come walking through the doors. It should be any minute now. 
He glances at the time on his phone and tells himself it’s still early. People, his father or Grayson especially, will certainly be there since he told them about it. He even programmed a reminder on their phones so it wouldn’t be forgotten amongst their busy schedules. 
He waits. 
And he waits. 
Then he waits a little bit more. 
Slowly but surely, people sip the last of their wine, eat the last bits of crackers and hummus from their plates, and then they slowly make their way out of the building, heading home for the night. 
Damian’s leaning against the wall, trying to read the news on his phone through watery eyes, when he realizes that some of the artists are starting to take down their work from the walls. 
He jams his phone back into his pocket and tries to clear his throat, which is strangely tight. 
How selfish of you to expect them to put everything else aside for you. There are things that are more important than you and your foolish drawings. Stupid. Stupid. Stu- 
“Hey, nice art,” an all too familiar voice says from behind him, almost making Damian jump in surprise. 
He turns to see Drake standing there in a ratty black hoodie, a black beanie, and a knockoff pair of aviators. The whole outfit is atrocious, and even though Damian knows it’s just a disguise, he can’t help but judge the distressed holes in Drake’s jeans. Only Drake would be an idiot and wear pants with holes in them in 19-degree weather. 
It’s only when Drake takes his attention away from the art on the wall that Damian realizes he’s been staring at him in silence for an uncomfortable amount of time. 
“You... came.” Damian says in a tone that’s closer to a question than a statement. 
Drake coughs into his elbow, clearly still not over his cold. “Yeah, I heard you telling Dick about it a few weeks ago. Thought I’d stop by and see what you’ve been working on.” 
Damian is completely taken off guard by the way Drake casually admits to remembering his art show. He never would have imagined that Drake of all people would have made a mental note about it and then actually taken the time to come. Seriously, Drake. The brother he gets along with the least. 
Suddenly, he finds it hard to think of anything to say. His relationship with Drake has always thrived on either hostility, sarcasm, or teasing. Real sincerity has never been part of the equation. 
Drake coughs again and then sniffles.  
For lack of anything better to do, Damian walks to one of the tables along the walls that has a box of tissues sitting on it. He grabs a few and then brings them back to Drake, offering them to him. 
“Thanks,” Drake says and takes them. He blows his nose and then stuffs the used tissue into his hoodie pocket. Damian crinkles his nose. 
“You disgust me, Drake. There is a perfectly good trash can for you to throw that into over there,” Damian says, pointing to said trashcan. 
“It’s too far away,” Drake groans. He turns his attention back to the wall of Damian’s art and points his finger towards the drawing on the top right. “Now that’s cool. I’d actually buy something like that.” 
Damian follows his finger with his eyes and sees that Drake is talking about a drawing of the manor. One that Damian’s drawn different variations of a few times over the years. This particular one has all of their father’s expensive cars displayed all over the place. Some are in the grass and some are on the long driveway. Two are parked on top of the manor and then one is parked on the moon at the top of the page. There are even some trees alongside the manor that have cars poking out of their leaves and branches, something that was inspired by the Weasley’s car and the Whomping Willow in Harry Potter.
“That one?” Damian says, secretly pleased. “Why would you be interested in that?” 
Drake rolls his eyes. “Gee, I wonder. It’s not like I lived there for years and still visit there frequently or anything. It couldn’t possibly hold any sentimental value for me or—” 
Damian tries to kick Drake in the shin to make him shut up, but Drake easily dodges it. 
“Whoa, okay, no need to get all salty on me, short stack.”
“No one understands your weird slang, Drake,” Damian says, crossing his arms tightly over his chest. 
Drake ignores him and turns his attention back to the drawing on the wall.  
Damian sighs. “Take the drawing and go. I was just about to pack up and leave when you came in here distracting me with your terrible jeans.” 
“Ouch,” Drake says, deadpan. He looks up at the drawing again. “You’re seriously gonna let me have that for free? You’re not gonna make me pay you some ridiculous amount for it simply because I’m me and you’re you?” 
Damian groans in frustration. Something about Drake showing up when no one else has, and also taking an interest in one of his drawings, made Damian come to the snap decision to give him the drawing.
“I don’t understand your gibberish. Just take it before I change my mind. And don’t expect any more gifts from me in the future.”
“Thanks... I think?”
Damian carefully takes the drawing down from the wall. He looks at it one last time, silently gleeful that his art is being appreciated, even if the person appreciating it is Drake. 
Drake takes the drawing from him almost reverently and slowly rolls it up so it won’t be damaged in the Gotham wind. 
“I’ll go buy a frame for it right now,” Drake says, walking backwards towards the door. “I’ll catch you at home in a few weeks for Christmas, okay?” 
“Yes, see you then,” Damian calls after him. He waits until Drake has completely disappeared into the night before whispering, “Thanks for coming.” 
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noricore · 3 years
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did NORI DAVIES chase one of seven sins seven miles down the coast? originally from BROOKLYN, NEW YORK, the TWENTY-FIVE YEAR OLD CIS-MALE is a TATTOO ARTIST AT SALT & INK and has lived in the key for TWO YEARS. HE is suppose to call MIDTOWN home, but there is always temptation lurking between the streets and the ocean that keeps HIM from heading back. sinners and saints take many forms, but they look like BOOBOO STEWART and on their way to make decisions, good and bad, they always seem to sway to the beat of PRISONER BY MILEY CYRUS. (blue, she/they, 20, cst)
hi besties ! i’m blue this is my baby nori, if you would like to know more abt him click the read more !
i’m terrible at writing intros/bios so pls bare w/ me kdhkhg
born to parents in the art field (his mom is a painter and his dad is a museum archivist) so he grew up in a very carefree chill home. 
his parents were very unconventional sometimes they would take him and his younger sibling out of school for a week to go to some random state for an art show and he loved every minute of it!
growing up in such an artsy home of course made him fell in love with it. he started drawing at age 10 and hasn’t stopped. he draws on literally every and anything he can
the older he got the more free spirited and reckless he became, nori was always graffitiing buildings, skating off of dangerous cliffs, etc you know usual dumb teenager shit. his parents were afraid he was going off in the deep end so starting that summer he was sent off to his grandparents keywest and they put him to work on their boats.
this is where he discovered he was bisexual and had his first love. to nori it was honestly just fun for the summer and after he turned 18 and didn’t have to go anymore he cut ties with them! (wc wink wink)
once nori hit 18 he turned down the reckless behavior a bit but he was still very much a wild card. during this time he decided he wanted to be a tattoo artist he devoted his life to that! most of his tattoos he either drew himself/tatt’d them on himself
he just recently move to key west two years ago but i know hes already stirred up some type of trouble
misc info !
always has a smile on his face! he never lets shit get to him cuz hes trying to live life to the fullest
gets bored of ppl rlly easily its one of his toxic traits unfortunately
is a walking chaotic bisexual trope
very friendly ! he loves to make friends wherever he goes. he def makes everyone friendship bracelets and leaves candy for them whenever he sees them
more will be added as i develop him !!
if you’d like to plot pls like this <3
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foul-z-fowl · 4 years
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Webtoons
I was inspired to write a post about my favorite webtoons and my thoughts on them, so buckle up for a hell of a ride.
Series used- Adventures of God, Small World, Brass & Sass, My Dictator Boyfriend, To Love Your Enemy, Love Me Knot, True Beauty, My Giant Nerd Boyfriend, The Four of Them, Lore Olympus, Luff, Brimstone and Roses, Miss Abbott and the Doctor, Prince & Knight, Sweet Cinnamon, Enjoy the show, Pixie and Brutus, Big Small Spoon, We are a Family, LMLY, A Matter of Life and Death.
Adventures of God-
Not for the easily offended, ESPECIALLY if you’re religious. At first I had my doubts, but this hilarious series won me over and I always look forward to the regular updates on Tuesdays and Saturdays. (Teo & Corey) 
Small World-
Sometimes they make me laugh, sometimes they make cry, sometimes I’m left wondering what the hell I just read. Welcome the world of Robin and Julian, the most adorable comic couple ever. Updates Tuesday, Friday, and Sunday (Wonsun Jin)
Brass & Sass-
Absolutely a contender for my favorite webtoon, I spend every day counting down until Thursday when it updates. The characters, their dynamics and just EVERYTHING is amazing, not in the least the adorable art. One of my favorite things is how Camilla still isn’t good at the trumpet after just a few months of practice. Her struggles with learning how to play (and with her cute tutor) are so relatable! (antlerella)
My dictator boyfriend-
To be honest, I read this for the same reason the artist draws it- for the butts! I discovered this through Adventures of God, after seeing what else the artist/authors worked on. While most of it is humor and fluff, the angst and the moral moments are buried in there, and I live for it. Updates every Thursday and Sunday. (Teo & Guy)
To Love your Enemy-
I’ll be honest, I almost dropped this one in the beginning. The plot lines seemed a tad confused, almost like the authors weren’t sure what direction they wanted to go with. But then, out of nowhere I just dug my heels in and read and just like that, I was in love. Updates every Monday and Thursday. (Junyoon & Taegeon)
Love me Knot-
I’ve always loved the mythology surrounding the red string of fate, and the second this popped up on my radar, I was hooked. The characters are adorable, quirky, and relatable. It also teaches several important lessons, including one I’ve always loved- Just because your soulmate is the best person for you, doesn’t mean they have to be the ONLY person for you. You can be happy with someone else. Updates every Wednesday. (sophia)
True Beauty-
I know, I know, everyone says that that ‘the love triangle took over’ , but I think in the last episode or two, the webtoon has really started to go back to it’s original message. It’s so crazy to think how far I’ve come with these characters. They’re no longer in high school, now they’re adults, whose careers and dreams sometimes interfere with their relationships and family. As only the second webtoon I ever read, back when I swore that I would never read webtoons for fun, it holds a special place in my heart, and is one of the only webtoons I have memorized the update day for- Wednesdays. (Yaongyi)
My Giant Nerd Boyfriend-
This Slice of Life webtoon has so many episodes, I’m still trying to catch up! But it’s safe to say Fishball’s hilarious down-to-earth real life stories are awesome. And sometimes very, very, weird. Updates Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. (Fishball)
The Four of Them-
To be honest, I’m only three episodes into this, and it’s already on my subscribe list.  Updates every Monday. (Mai Hirschfeld)
Lore Olympus-
Yes, I know it’s the top webtoon, and everyone has to be ‘not like other people’ and ‘quirky’ and ‘against the status quo’, but guys, that’s what made me miss out on One Direction when they were popular. I love Lore Olympus, and I love the character development. Persephone and Hades’ relationship is real. Also, this was the series that introduced me to webtoon. I was scrolling through youtube ignoring the recommendation’s for Helevetica Dubs dub of it, until I finally listened to it, and I was hooked. That was made me come to webtoon and without it, I would have missed out on several amazing stories. I do have one major problem though- I think Persephone is over sexualized. Updates every Sunday. (Rachel smythe)
Luff-
Oh my god. Luff. Where to begin. I loved every second of Luff. It took me on a roller coaster ride of emotion, and trust me, if the premise and the beginning seem cliche, that just makes the payoff of the ending all the more sweet. Luff was beautiful look and humanity, love, and relationships. Finished :(. (Arechan)
Brimstone and Roses-
I just started this one an hour ago, but what the hell. Brimstone and Roses seems alright so far. (Honestly, I’m kind of hoping Bea gets her ex back instead of ending up with the demon.) Finished (Mei Rothschild)
Miss Abbott and the Doctor-
Another recommend form Helevetica Dubs, this adorable, hilarious, heart-warming, amazing, beautiful series is perfect. And because the author is amazing, there are regular episodes where everyone is gender bent. Yeah! The best part about these Mr. Abbott and the Doctor episode is that things don’t always play out the same. 10/10, would recommend! Finished :(. (Maripaz Villar)
Prince & Knight-
This author has quite the talent for making EVERY all-to-short episode end in a cliffhanger, which is very frustrating for me. But, this is adorable, so it can slide. :). Updates Monday 6pm, UTC. (Tsuyonpu)
Sweet Cinnamon-
To be fair, only half of the update actually are part of the story line. But, hey the author knows how to write compelling characters who I would let be my friend in real life! Updates are fairly sporadic, but usually a week or two apart. (Glen_❤️)
Enjoy the Show-
Another one of my top contenders, this webtoon makes me cry in the spaces between updates. I found this series through a canvas creators collab, and I was HOOKED. The characters, the art, it’s all amazing. And the twist! ARRRRR, I was so mad I never considered that!! One of my favorite things about this series is anytime it looks like a character might be a love interest for out heroine, they are swiftly dealt with. Jailtbait? Self-explanatory. Gabe? He’s just a flirt. Updates are generally once a month or so, but the creator regularly participates in collabs! (Jenna A)
Pixie and Brutus-
You’ve probably seen at least one of these adorable comics somewhere besides webtoon, but there are actually a lot more than you think! Pixie and Brutus is about a tiny little kitten and an old retired military dog, and their friendship, and how protective Brutus is of Pixie, is adorable! Update are fairly random- sometimes the update are a month apart, sometimes they happen back to back. (Pet Foolery)
Big Small Spoon-
Big small spoon opened up a whole new world of webtoons for me. It introduced me to the Slice of Life genre, and the creator’s canvas collabs have brought me to so many of my favorite webtoons! This comic is adorable and drawn from the creator’s real life. Updates Tuesday ACST (a r v i e)
We are a family-
Even though this adorable webtoon only has 24 episodes, it definitely is another contender for my favorite! It’s just so precious and adorable! It’s about a young couple (Joon and Erin) who are trying to raise a baby (Edan), it’s veeeery funny (just be warned- it has an inappropriate content warning for a reason. Nothing’s graphic, just alluded to.) Updates roughly a week or two apart. (mocoso)
LMLY-
Short for Let Me Love You, this adorable series is about a boy who’s crush asks him to fake date her! The characters are adorable and I love the design for Leon (the boy) who has hectochromia (two different colored eyes). Updates used to be close together, but recently they’ve become every few months. (edbe)
A Matter of Life and Death-
Probably my favorite webtoon of all time. The characters are amazing, the idea behind the series is amazing, the art is beautiful, and watching the creator’s style evolve over time is such a treat. This series is truly amazing. Unfortunatly, the creator, the AMAZING BEAUTIFUL WONDERFUL SNIPSTER, has been dealing with some issues and hasn’t updates since May, and doesn’t intend to anytime soon. Speaking of Snipster- Snipster is so awesome she posts fanfiction, fanart, and alternate universe versions of her characters. Go to her Tapas for some highly NSFW extras. Updates not forthcoming for a while (and it ended on a cliffhanger!!!) (Snipster-webtoon Snarpers-Tapas) @the-snipster
Still here? I hope you found something good to read!
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argumentl · 4 years
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The Freedom of Expression Ep 1 - Haruna Fuuka files lawsuit against internet slanderers
*with Kaoru (K), Joe (J), Tasai (T) , who is a journalist writing for the newspaper Tokyo Sports, and Kami/god.*
Kaoru: Hi, this is Dir en grey's Kaoru. Have you heard of 'The Freedom of Expression' somewhere before?
Joe, Tasai : *noding*
K: I've a feeling we've done this before...
J: Thats right, yes...Its not a feeling, we actually did.
K: We are reviving the show we did on the radio station InterFM from 2015-16, on youtube this time.
J: Awesome
*applause*
J: I was really happy when I was first told about the revival.
K: I was also surprised *laughs*
J: Its not that you were made to revive the show though, right Kaoru?
K: The suggestion just came at me.
J: Oh really, like 'How about it?'
K: Like, 'Wanna tryy?' 1*
J: Ah, in a Kansai accent?
K:Yes yes
J: Like, 'Lets tryyy'..kind of thing...it started like that *laughs*
K: Yep
J: We did quite a lot (on InterFM). We even did a special edition
K, T : Yes, we did
J: We even made stickers
K: Brazil!
J:Yes
T: Ah, the live broadcast..at the Olympics
J: It was Dobashi san...Bishbash Dobashi san.
T: It would be good if we could do another live broadcast at this year's Tokyo Olympics.
J: On this You tube channel?
T: Yes *laughs*
J: A live broadcast might be a bit difficult legally, as for the Olymipcs *T laughs*
K: Um, thats *shhh*
J: Oh, its a secret!' *K laughing*  Maybe if were are asked by Tokyo Sports..?
K: Yes yes...So, as to the freedom of expression... 
Kami/god: Wait, wait, wait..I've come down too.
J: Oh, Kami?
K: He's saying it from himself *laughs*..I thought he would come if we beckoned him though.
J: Thats what usually happened. He was the kind of god that would come down after we called him, but now a god that comes down on his own accord.
K: Wasn't he like that before too? Should we keep him in reseve a bit more?
J: He'll want to appear, we can't help it?
Kami: You were forgetting about me!
K: We are not forgetting you!
Kami: You musn't forget your god!
*laughing*
T: We are not forgetting you!
Kami: Its not good!
J: You are always in our hearts.
T: Yes, he is.
Kami: Yes, thats it..you have to think like that.
J: But, you are not in the studio today, kami?
Kami: Oh..um, im just getting off a night shift..
J: A night shift?!
K: Ah, but it was like that before..
Kami: Right.
J: You are doing night shift work again? *Tasai laughs*
Kami: yes, thats right.
K: That was a while ago wasn't it, how many years ago?
J: Oh, is this the night shift season?
Kami: No, its..
T: You worked for ¥1000 per hour right?
Kami: Yes, yes...my hourly rate has risen a bit though. They were telling me 'Take a rest, take a rest', so my income dropped.
J: Ahh, its what they called a 'reformed working style', right?
Kami: Right
J: Its tough for you too, Kami.
Kami: *laughs* Yes it is.
K: He's the same as ever...  so lets get started.
J, T: Please
K: Ah, by the way, Tasai san, as well as Bishbashi Dohashi san, wasn't there another person before (at InterFM)?
T: Yes..a beastly guy *K laughs* An old aquaintance of the listeners', a guy called Monster Hiranabe.
J: Its a strange story, but once when a certain celebrity died, Hiranabe-san called me up, and asked me if I had known the deceased guy...as soon as I said that I hadn't known him very well, he hung up on me straight away!
T: Thats awful!
J: He is awful
T: This very guy, Hiranabe, even got a promotion from the manager.
J: Eh? Promoted to what?!
T: To Director
J:Eh?! Really?
K: Is that okay??
J: No, it'll be terrible!
K: Right, lets move onto the main news...I'd like to get deeper into the concept of 'The Freedom of Expression'.
J: Right, so Haruna Fuuka has filed a lawsuit againts those who engage in 'internet slander'.
A tweet stated 'Both her parents created a failure'.
On Jan 14th, 18 year old Haruna and her mother filed a lawsuit at Yokohama district court demanding ¥2,654,000 in damages from a person engaged in spreading falsehoods which have damaged her dignity.
On the acknowledgement that these tweets went beyond what was deemed acceptable by society at large, on Nov 1st the internet provider was ordered to make public the persons name and address etc.
Haruna has been tweeting since the age of 9, giving her opinion at random about society's problems, and creating a stir. She now has over 200,000 followers and is fighting 10 years of slander. Kaoru, what do you think about this?
K: Well..I mean, naturally, you'd feel like that..
J: Hmm, but I don't know the details but..the name of the defendant has been withheld...well, its a common problem that as a person speaking in the public eye, you are going to get criticism along with praise...like a 'fame tax'.  That said, how far do you go before honour is damaged? On SNS, you are of course free to express yourself, you can write what you want, but the issue is what constitutes damage to honour. This might be a very difficult area in which to draw a legal line, but on the other hand, if you don't draw a legal line, things may escalate out of control...Kaoru, what do you think?
K: Well for example, if banter between friends is written down...controlling that...Its best not to look at whats written in the first place.
J: Ah, the person in question right? By the way Kaoru, its a strange question, but do you search for yourself online?
K: No, not really. I hear things, the office staff will tell me.
J: Oh, if anything is being said?
T: In the world of fame its quite true, that even if 98 or 99 opinions out of 100 are good, the one negative thing will stand out.
K: Well, yes, its the bad things that..
J: On the other hand, from the writers'  perspective at Tokyo Sports, how far are you willing to slander someone? You could write an article in a good or bad way..
T: Of course balance is important, but of course, if the courts want to complain to us, they can call us, and start an exchange, but in the case of slanders on the internet, its like, who do you complain to? So, if you ask celebrities, they will say Tokyo Sports slander is better than anonymous online slander because at least they can complain to our face.
J: Mm, absolutely. Just how far do we protect these tweets, these freedoms of expression? Its difficult.
K: Are these really 'expressions'?
J: Well, esentially, yes. When you say 'tweets' you think of nonsense, but really its media expressing things, or artists expressing things..
K: Yes, yes, you can get a sense of individual expression.
J: And this especially has the power to influence...
K: Yes, and people get swept up in it.
J: I think this is universal, but at the moment I think Japan is bit like a geyser, people will rush towards any incident and some will start complaining, I mean, I think its important to say what you feel, but its complaining without trying to solve anything, only satisfying yourself.
K: Thats it
J: Its sounds strange to say, but it ends like masturbation. If it turns into something towards a soloution its ok, but just creating thoughtless slander to satisfy yourself is questionable.
K: So its often said, if you continue the conversation only looking at the bad things, it can't be helped. There are also good people out there..you know, put more importance on those people. How to put it...its like we said before, if you focus too much on that one out of a hundred, its kind of rude to the other 99.
J: I see. Still this person has over 200,000 followers and its said she has been fighting slander for ten years.
T: She's always been a bit of a talking point online. I'll just search for her.
J: I also have Instagram, I do stuff to do with societal problems on The Dave Fromm show's youtube channel, and whenever I upload about it (on IG), my followers decrease!  *everyone laughs* Outrageously decrease! Im serious, despite getting so far, that channel updates every week, and with every update my followers decrease. Maybe people hate reading about societal problems..*to Tasai* What did you find?
T: So for example there was that thing recently about regulating gamers to 60mins per session, she had quite a few things to say about that, playing vs learning etc.
J: I see..Young people do complain, well you can't really tell here, but on the other hand, young people these days, i know they would hate us old guys talking about this, but young people apparently have three main taboos. The first is talking about sex, they dont follow this, the second is politics, they don't follow this either, and the other one is, they don't like being made to talk about the kind of things that they really need to be talking about...there seems to be this kind of trend. So i think in this way...theres a chance Haruna is getting right to the point of this. But certainly, applying the law in a way that recognises infringement/damage to honour by way of personal utterances has the potential to lead to restrictions on the freedom of expression. Its a difficult play off, isnt it?
T: Yes, it really is
J: Obviously, when it comes to race, or racial discrimination, there has come to be rules concerning hate speech and so on, but how far can you regulate one-to-one slandering, or..how far can you protect the person being attacked? Should the country or the judiciary decide this? Its difficult.
K: Kami, what do you think? Are you there?
Kami: Well, I hear slanders towards me all the time *everyone laughs* Like, god tells lies, god is useless, or even that there is no such thing as god!
J: Ahh, i see. They deny you!
Kami: Yes, thats it. If I care about those things, I lose!
J: Do you search for yourself online?
Kami: I do. *everyone laughs* ..and whenever I do its only ever those things that come up.
J: Ah of course...Kami, you have an exceptionally good handle on social media  dont you?
T: He's great
Kami: Ive got a good handle on it.
J: Do you use an iphone?
Kami: I have two.
J: God has two iphones! Thats brilliant.
Kami: Yep, I have two...im not allowed to use them while im working.
T: Does he have a contract? With his address and such?
J: I can't tell whether he's great, or whether he's not so great...
Kami: If i care, I lose...I prefer them to hate me, rather than to be indifferent to me.
K: Kami, what do you think about playing computer games for one hour?
Kami: If the kid is good at it, they should keep doing it.
T: I see, i see.
J: Ohh not sure about that. That seems a bit out.
Kami: No, i really think so. Skilled kids can carry on playing.
K: Should unskilled ones give up?
Kami: Yes, they shouldn't do it...When they play all day, and they just can't clear the level..that kind of kid.
K: Its a waste of time right?
Kami: Exactly, its a waste.
J: They should do something else?
Kami: Yes
K: You should quit if you have no talent for it?
Kami: Yes, yes, its talent.
J: Well, just getting off a nightshift must be tiring.
K: For us too, you know, we should try not to say 'stop it' too quickly...we have to keep it interesting.
Kami: It was interesting though, I was listening.
T: Oh thank you.
Kami: But don't tell lies about me.
T: If you thought it was interesting, you should write about it on your social media.
Kami: Yeh, everyone pretends on social media anyway, they won't know its me.
K: Well, that was the first episode of 'The Freedom of Expression' but, should I ask how it was..? *laughs*
J: But, being together again after a while was refreshing..
K,T: Yes, thats right
T: Im happy.
J: So am I.
K: Well, so we started in this vein....Tune in next time to see how it goes.  So this time, only this camera, theres nothing here *gestures behind*, but if lots of people watch, we could go different places, increase our cameras. I still don't know about your fee, Joe.
J: Eh?! What do you mean? It says here my fee will stay the same!
K: I might have to lower it *laughs*
J: *coughs* You're only lowering mine?...But everyone please subscribe.
K: Yes please. Please look forward to next time. Thank you very much.
1* They are saying 'How about this?' in a Kansai accent, how to translate that??
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reeesea · 4 years
Text
Something Sweet: Part Seven
~sweet home~
one ~ two ~ three ~ four ~ five ~ six ~ seven ~ eight ~ nine
pairing: minsung, han jisung/lee minho
warning: mild language
words: 4.7k
summary:  Home is where your bros at right? right.
a/n: I actually like this chapter, shocker. i hope you enjoy 
ao3
----------------
Minho stared at the video file sitting on his computer, on the familiar application site that had been haunting his mind for the past couple years. The debate he found himself in with himself on whether or not to submit another application, had become his default subject of thought for much of the past few weeks. All building up to right now. Something had tipped the scale though. Something that reminded him if he didn't submit an entry this year, that he might as well have given up on his one dream. His one goal. The only thing that had been keeping him motivated through university. So once again he found himself rationalizing, and knew that if anything he had to try, at least just one last time. 
Upload complete, Thank you for your entry!
Minho sighed loudly. He had sent it in. The first part of the application. It was just a basic dance routine supplied by the academy. He had practice and recorded it all within one sitting. Having been a part of a dance crew for much of the past year had allowed him to quickly pick up choreography and perfect it. The other reason being that he wanted more than anything to get the overbearing presence of the audition tape out of his head space as soon as possible. A heavy sigh left his lips as he laid back down on the studio floor, not too long after a ping of his phone revived just enough for him to check his messages.
[Rich Boy Han Jisung]
2:50 pm
Minho-hyung!
I hope your day has been going well~
Sadly, no updates on when ill be free :/ 
They’re working us hard for the debut
It’s alright Ji, work hard!
You better be taking care of yourself tho...
4:03 pm (new)
Have you heard this song? Made me think of you :)
{link attached}
I hope you like it!!!!
Oh, no i havent
I’ll give it a listen ^-^
As of late it wasn’t uncommon for Jisung to send the older songs he thought he would like. Always saying some cheesy line that was so blatantly sweet it made Minho flustered everytime. This time of course was no exception. 
Ping.
HYUNG THAT EMOJI
Asjdnjsfma
I knew I was rubbin goffon you 
Kkkkk
Dont get too ahead of yourself 
atleast I can still type coherent sentences
~goffon~ 
Boo :p
Why Jisung was so persistent about sending him songs was lost on the older, but it was a sweet reminder that someone was thinking about him. It had been a while since Minho had even imagined that someone took a few minutes of their day to actually consider how he was doing. It didn't quite make sense to him that suddenly out of nowhere, there was his boy, man, person, who purposefully took the time to dedicate brain cells to his existence. Wild. 
Minho hurriedly clicked the link to the song that Jisung had sent. It was an upbeat song, with a strong but subtle strumming of a guitar to keep the song’s pace just quick enough to be comfortable. “There's no one else that could ever hold me like you do.” The lyrics were in the realm of positive longing and companionship, but the dips into minor chords and tone of the singer created a mood of desperation. More than anything, the song brought forth a story to Minho. One that he could see with his eyes close and feel his body wanting to move to. 
A smile stretched across his face, as he rose from his spot on the floor, dusting off the dull ache and pressure in his shoulders from having just finished a routine not even 10 minutes ago. 
“But I know that I'd be crazy, Not to wanna be the one to keep you up all night”
Woah there Jisung, at least take me out to dinner first. He made a mental note to tease the younger later about his “Made me think of you :)” line later. Already stretching and drawing a plan in his head, Minho took his phone and saved the song, pressing the repeat button twice, to allow the guitar chords and chorus harmonies to carry on endlessly. A smirk stretched into an excited smile. Not wanting to jinx himself, a shy “finally” was whispered in the back of Minho’s mind at the surge of inspiration, but not spoken aloud just yet.
---
Flashing lights, heavy makeup, hot clothing, and too much fog from the smoke machine is all Jisung had thought about for the last couple hours. 3RAHCHA was in their last photo shoot for their debut. The concept photos would be released later through the week, slowly revealing the three members and their group as officially signed with JJP ent. 
The multicolor lights had been running through his vision for so long that as soon as he walked into their Green Room, he had almost forgotten what color everything actually was. Looking in the mirror he saw the blonde highlighted streaks in his hair had settled nicely, slightly slicked back. The stylist had surely done their jobs well. Painting the three rappers up to look less like the nightcrawlers they were, and into something that leather and fishnet clad superstars might look like was definitely a challenge. Jisung had his makeup done just enough to give his eyes a smoky look to them, and grey contacts to emphasize his gaze. The ensemble he had on looked like something that had come straight from a catwalk. Fishnets crawling up his arms from his gloved hands and an asymmetrical shit he for sure would not have been able to put on without the help of his stylist-noona. All that plus some leather pants and combat boots, he definitely looked more like his persona J.One than the notorious hoodie clad couch potato named Jisung he usually found himself as. 
Having just finished his own solo shoot, he signaled Changbin to head on to the set as he returned. The older nodded from his chair in front of the makeup station, as the artist finished the final touches to his eyeliner. Jisung watched as the shorter rapper walked out to the set in a white puffer jacket that he somehow pulled off, even with the bright red pants he wore. A part of Jisung was thankful his stylist hadn’t taken that many liberties with his outfit, but the makeup and outfit Changbin wore really only emphasized his intimidating stare and the wideness of his shoulders. It was undeniable that their concept photos would come out well. 
Chan, who was seated on a couch, eating some of the provided sandwiches, was already hunched over his computer and mixing equipment again, airpods in. Probably working on tracks for their third comeback knowing him. Not wanting to jump right back into work Jisung snagged a few snacks from the buffet and found a chair he could lay on. Listening to music that wasn't work had become a rarity for Jisung in the years he had been with 3RACHA. Of course he always tried to stay on top of the recent pop and hip hop trends, but straying any farther than his trusty morning and workout playlists was more than unlikely. 
Lately though, Jisung found himself looking through a lot of random indie, alternative, “western” pop, and especially dance music. The versatility of the genres was comforting to Jisung in the rather turbulent state his emotions and mental state have been in, as the debut approached. Also Minho. Meeting Minho definitely had introduced a whole new set of feelings Jisung was still working on navigating. As he listened to the different songs that populated this radio, he told himself he was just looking for some inspiration for his lyrics and 3RACHA’s new music, but even he knew that was mostly a lie. 
Ever since that night at the bar with Minho he found himself always considering the older and what he would think of a song or how he would dance to it, or if he would even like it. After pointing out that he liked a particularly upbeat pop song with melancholic lyrics, during their impromptu karaoke session, Jisung had been delvinging into all related categories to find songs he thought the older might enjoy. He wanted more than anything to inspire his older companion? Partner? (that was a later Jisung question.) but he wanted to repay the man who had allowed him to get out of his creative slump. That night, as soon as the youngest rapper had returned to the 3RACHA “house” he felt the start of at least 5 separate tracks and choruses appear in his brain. His two hyungs jumped into action along with him as Jisung desperately tried to write and record everything that was jumping out of his brain at once. 
Jisung remembered Chan’s smile and encouraging words as he fitted a few of his new verses to songs they had previously put on the shelf. After finding a particularly emotional but upbeat song he immediately wanted to send it to Minho. He always got hung up on what to say with the link. Other than the thought vomit that occurred every time he chooses to send him a potentially good song: “Found this song? U Like???” No Jisung, what are you five?? “I think you will enjoy this song. Please give it a listen? :0” No that just sounds desperate. 
“You doing alright there Ji, I can hear you sighing through my earbuds?” Chan peeked out from under his styled bangs with a raised eyebrow, sending Jisung into a red embarrassed mess that he had been caught. He hoped his layers of foundation would cover it up. 
“Yeah fine fine, don't worry. I’m FINE.” Attempting to hide Jisung curled up tighter into his arm chair. Just be casual Jisung it's a song not a marriage proposal dear god. “Have you heard this song? Made me think of you :)” Good, yes fine. Send.
Minho responded immediately and cutely with an emoji that made his heart jump a little. Minho would respond always with a variation of a “Thanks! I’ll go listen”, but Jisung had yet to receive any confirmation that the older actually enjoyed the links he sent, much less had found some inspiration in them. At this point the only thing he could do was hope. He wanted nothing more than Minho to be smiling because of him.
--
Officially exhausted, it wasn’t until late when the 3RACHA boys had finally made it back to their apartment. The day Jisung had, had been anything but short. Almost collapsing immediately on the couch. Sana notified them that she had already ordered food to be delivered for dinner and that they should go to bed as soon as they had finished eating. Chan looked like he was about to pass out on the couch before the food even arrived, which was more than likely at this point. After their shoot they were immediately sent to a few other meetings laying out their marketing and schedule plans for the upcoming weeks. Although glad they were able to part with their artistic and career decisions with their company, it did add a lot of work and responsibilities to the trio. 
Jisung’s phone had died somewhere after meeting 3 of 5 and he had submitted to having to carry the lifeless brick with him anyway. Not ideal for his wandering mind and anxiety that comes with a few too many stressful meetings. Once finally arriving home he went and plugged his phone in at the charger on the kitchen counter. Lighting up with notification buzzes as it rebooted back to life. 
[ 5 new messages from Lee Minho hyungie]
Immediately cursing himself internally for not bringing his charger with him, he opened his messages from Minho ignoring all others. 
[Lee Minho hyungie]
5:45 pm
Hey Jisungie, just finished up practice!
Actually may or may not have danced to the song u sent…
Maybe I’ll show you some day hehehehehehehehe ;)
7:21 pm
Han Jisung, did you forget your charger again >:/ 
Well I’m off to my late shift, I hope you have a good night~
Jisung always found himself smiling at Minho’s before work texts. They were always so cute. Either some sort of sweet well wishing or some other Minho-esque goodbye, along the lines of “don’t die mysteriously while i'm gone ;p” or “Have a good night, try not to miss my WONDERFUL company too much <3”. (The hearts always made Jisung grin hard, even if they were sarcastic)
This night though, Jisung found him almost jumping in victory at Minho’s text. 
[Lee Minho hyungie]
12:35 am
YOU DANCED TO THE SONG
Really?!?!?!
What did you like about it? 
When can I see????
You better not leave me on read after work!
Jisung tried to imagine what kind of dance Minho would do to the track he sent,and suddenly found himself flush at the thought of watching the other dance. Somehow, watching Minho dance, felt more intimate than any other situation that they’ve shared. Thankfully Minho seemed to want to hold off, so at least of the time being Jisung’s heart was safe. The exhaustion and stress from the day faded ever so slightly as soon as he thought of Minho with coordinating blush to match. 
Jisung you lovestruck fool.
“Jisung! Food’s here!!! If you don't hurry Chan’ll eat your portion again.”
“HEY! It was one time.” Laughter filled the apartment gently as they all respectively fought gravity to get up and make their way to collect the food from the delivery man.  
---
Minho tore up the stairs and through their apartment door as quickly as he could without spilling the carry out food he had in his arms. The clock was ticking a little past midnight and fear set in that the older would miss their planned celebrations. 
Bursting through the door, “Did I beat him?!” The oldest was frazzled from rushing in order to beat their third roommate home from work.
“Barely! I was afraid you wouldn’t make it, with having to bring the carry out.” Hyunjin’s sigh of relief was visible throughout the boy's now relaxed body. He had spent the last ten minutes hoping that they would still be able to pull off their surprise party for the youngest. Pacing around and failing to come up with any backup plans if Minho had been later than Felix. Thankfully for them both, Minho had a way of always being on time. 
“Hey all that matters is I made it. Is everything else ready?” Looking around Minho could see that Hyunjin’s bed was transitioned back into the couch setting and that the floors had been tidied up. A couple stray balloons littered the floor as well as a home made “happy birthday felix” sign hung from their living room screen divider. 
“Yep, I've just been waiting anxiously for you to get home for the past half hour.”
The door handle of their apartment began to jiggle, signaling the two boys to spring into action. Minho setting down the carry out, and Hyunjin frantically lights candles on the small cake on the coffee table. The door swung open, revealing a disheveled after-work Felix wandering through the door. As soon as the boy turned toward their living room, he was accosted with shouts and the flailing limbs of his hyungs. 
“Surprise!!!” “Happy Birthday!!!” 
Felix’s smile erased any of the signs of exhaustion off his face immediately as soon as he spotted his hyungs excited expressions. The cake, the streamers, the balloons, and sign all sparked some joyful tearing of his eyes as he set down his things and made his way to the small cake with a few random lit candles on top. The clock had crossed over into the next day as Felix had made his way home, that he had almost forgotten that it was now technically the early morning hours of his birthday. Coming home to joyful cheers instead of their usual exhausted silence had given him a certain happiness that he hadn’t realized he was missing. 
For all of three of the roommates this was their first time having a celebration in their small home together. By now the sense of home was undeniable and without realizing it all of them had begun to consider each other and their shared 3 room apartment, home. 
The disjointed singing of happy birthday followed by the laughter and conversation surrounded their coffee table as the three enjoyed their small carryout feast and cake. The warmth that their company gave each other lasted well into the night.
“Hyung! It's my birthday, stop eating all the cake!!!” 
“I have no idea what youre talking about Lixie.” Minho says while actively taking another bite of their 2 person sized cake. 
“Hyung!” The laughter of the oldest filled the room followed by the other two’s not too long after.
“Happy Birthday Lixie~” The smile hadn’t left the freckled boys faces since he had sat down, and remained as he pulled his two roommates into a forceful hug. It was his birthday so the boys both submitted to the clingy nature of their third roommate, as always.
---
It was late into the early morning by the time Minho had checked his phone. 
[ 5 new messages from Rich Boy Han Jisung]
A soft pang of guilt hits his chest after reading the younger’s texts and realizing that he did in fact leave the other on read for the better part of the last two hours.  
2:43 am 
I’m so sorry Sungie!
We were celebrating Felix’s birthday, and I didnt check my phone…. 
Look at the cute cake we got him!
{photo attached}
Minho sent the selfie of the three of them with Felix’s cake, if anything just to lessen the guilt in his chest. Hoping that the cuteness of Felix’s smile would be enough to forgive him for low key ghosting him for a few hours. Minho knows that on the days Jisung has the most schedules are the hardest for him mentally, and he always tries his best to be there for him and send him a message or two to lessen the load on those nights. The fact that he hadn’t been there tonight filled him with some worry. A part of him hoped that the younger would’ve been asleep by now but their late night track record did not exactly support that. 
---
Jisung had been lying painfully awake in his bed for an hour when he heard the buzz of his phone. Slightly upset with his body for not giving into the exhaustion he had gathered from the day, and just letting him sleep, he turned to the side table to check the messages. Awake fully ,but only mentally half conscious, he read through his messages:
Minho. Oh, yay, it's Minho.
Felix’s Birthday. Oh right he had mentioned that coming up.
Cute cake. Aw that cake is really cute… wait. 
Birthday.
I have one of those, around this time to- 
I missed my birthday. I forgot my birthday. Everyone forgot.
The cute picture Minho had sent was so filled with happiness that Jisung almost let the pain slide and pass the moment by. But something just didn't feel right in letting himself forget his own birthday. The fact that the others hadn’t remembered didn’t bother him too much. Chan, Changbin, they were all busy with schedules and he can't blame them. Especially since he, himself had forgotten. No birthday text from his family either. Unsurprising though since he rarely got in contact with them since moving to Korea in high school. He forgot though. 
He wasn’t quite sure why this was bothering him so much. Some people don't even celebrate their birthday, or remember how old they are, but Jisung had always prided himself on never letting his work take over entirely who he was. To exhausted-Jisung, he couldn’t help but feel like this was one step toward losing the grip on who he was, and that was in itself, terrifying. 
The coldness of his bed and the dark expanse of his room seemed to only perpetuate the way Jisung felt. Floating, alone, lost. His insecurity was starting to come into focus, and no wonder it had been keeping him up. He had been spiraling for days probably, without even knowing it. The buzz of his phone lit up his face, snapping him out of his own thoughts for a moment. 
[Lee Minho hyungie]
2:50 pm 
You okay Jisung? 
I hope I didn't wake you
Jisung noticed that the app had revealed that he had read the messages and was indeed awake. Unfortunately, exhausted-and--spirling-Jisung was the only one present enough to send a response. Hopefully Minho wouldn’t mind him too much. 
You didn’t wake me, was already up :/ 
It looks really fun hyung
I just realized something too
My birthday was yesterday
I forgot it
Jisung found himself fighting the watering of his eyes as he sent those messages. Why was he crying? He just forgot, he was busy. It was okay. Right? The tears seemed to only cloud his vision more, blocking him from reading the messages from Minho that were buzzing and populating the screen. Not bothering to wipe his eyes, he let them blurr.
Wh- do you- mea- ???
Jis--ng ar- y-- ok--?
I-- sorry i- di-nt -----
---- wa-t --- ca-l?
--sung?
A few moments passed, without him realizing it, as his phone buzzed some more, screen changing to the incoming call screen. Sucking up his tears and drying his damp screen, it took a few tries before answering the call.
---
“Jisung!?” Jisung nearly flinched, just nearly. 
“Hi hyung, How was work?” hoping to cover up his tears by changing the subject. Jisung thought it was a pretty good attempt.
“How wa- what, no. Jisung are you okay?” There it was again. The undeniable worry in Minho’s voice. Ow. 
“Yeah I’m okay.” Despite Jisung’s efforts it was obvious to Minho that the other had in fact been crying. Not wanting to push the younger though, he allowed him to change the subject
“.... okay, I just want to check in on you. I worry you know, Sung!” 
“About me? that's silly hyung.” The distance in his tone replaced Jisung’s usual brightness, and it hurt Minho to hear it. 
“I don't think so. How am I to know what my favorite customer is up to? You may be a soon to be rap star but that doesn’t keep you from ignoring your hyung.” Even though Jisung giggled at that, the irony of the statement wasn’t lost on Minho. A wave of guilt washed over his chest as soon as he said it. 
“I am sorry though. For not answering sooner and everything.” 
And for reminding you of your birthday, and making you cry, and not being there to make you smile.
“No don’t be sorry! That’ll only make me feel worse for bothering you… I think the exhaustion was just making me delirious, I haven't been sleeping well these past few nights.” Minho had to fight his initial protective instincts that told him to scold the younger for not taking care of himself, because a part of him knew that the younger was certainly trying his best to do so. 
“Well if you can’t sleep ever, just call me okay? I’m usually up from my shifts anyway. Plus if I'm not up surely one of my roommates is. Felix will probably never let go of you once he finds your birthday brothers." Hearing Minho's laugh lightened the tight pressure that Jisung hadn't realized had been settled in his chest.
"Okay hyung, i'd like that I think."
"You better. My time rarely comes free, and this is a limited time offer." Jisung’s laugh is a little bit more enthusiastic this time. 
“Of course hyung.” A silence came over them for a moment. Not an awkward one, more of a point of realization and relief. Like the feeling after having a good cry, in Jisung’s case. 
“Happy belated birthday Jisung.” 
“Thanks hyung… Did you have a fun time with Felix?” 
“Yeah! It was actually a lot of fun. Just some carry out and cake after work, but it was good to relax with them. We don't always have free time together, and haven’t had the chance to celebrate anything until now. Hyunnie luckily found a cake on sale at the mart today, sparking this whole thing.” 
Minho remembered the frantic call from the younger as he delved into his plans for giving Felix the “perfect surprise birthday celebration” because he had “found the perfect cake to match Felix’s cuteness.” It was on sale. Also because “Come on Min-hyung Felix would absolutely do the same for us.” Explaining the situation to Jisung really did solidify the fact that Minho knew Felix, would in fact, plan some adorable birthday celebration for the older two if given the opportunity. 
“What would you guys have done if he hadn't found the cake?”
“I’m not sure maybe it would’ve just been a carry-out celebration.”
“Still sounds really nice hyungie. You and your roommates seem so close.” 
“I suppose shared rent does that to people.” Minho laughed it off but he had begun to cherish the brotherly bond that had grown between his roommates. 
Not having ever considered it before, the fact that the roommates were only able to buy a cake because it happened to be on sale, revealed to Jisung that their financial situations may have been farther apart than he realized. Money had never been a barrier that Jisung had to face, always having family (or honestly Changbin) help pay for his living and pursuit of his dreams. Sure he’s had part time jobs in the past but he never found himself worrying about not making enough each month. Not going to university definitely was a large factor in maintaining his “affordable” lifestyle.
“It's nice you do things for each other. I can't remember the last time my hyungs and I have done something together that didn't have to do with our music.” Jisung started to feel some sort of jealousy at the closeness that Minho and his roommate had found in each other. Financial guilt and emotional jealousy are a strange combination for a half conscious Jisung to say the least. 
“Are those fools not taking care of my Sung properly? Illegal, tell them to call me I have to yell at them too. They better not be working you too hard.” 
‘My Sung’ Jisung almost choked. Almost. 
“Nonono Hyung! They take care of me fine, we're all just exhausted with work.”
“Hmmmm okay they get a pass this time, but please relay my threat.”
“Okay okay I will.” 
“You should probably get some rest soon. You're busy tomorrow right?” 
Jisung yawned in response, which was enough convincing for Minho that he needed to rest. 
“Okay looks like it's sleepy time for hardworking Jisung~”
“Wait hyung!” Jisung wasn’t quite ready to sleep yet, even though his body was actively fighting him.
“Yes belated birthday boy?”
“Thank you for not letting me be a sad gremlin all night. It would've been nice to have spent my birthday with you, but you still made me feel better.”
The musings of sleepy Jisung were just about enough to let the fondness burst from Minho’s chest. As much as he continues to hide it, the fondness still seeps into his voice, “Of course, Jisung we always have next year.” A promise he wasn’t sure he could keep but Jisung always made him want to try new things. 
“Next year?” The sleepiness had definitely taken over, making his voice much softer than his usual bright edge. 
“Yes next year... Goodnight Sungie, call me back if you can't sleep okay.”
“Mmkay, G’night hyungie.” Already half asleep by the time he hung up, Minho was glad that the younger was finally able to rest. Glancing at his roommates huddled together on the couch already drifting off, Minho accepted that it was his turn to finally rest knowing that all his younger companions were all safely sleeping. Hyung instincts he supposes.
-----
one ~ two ~ three ~ four ~ five ~ six ~ seven ~ eight ~ nine
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