#then it turned into some kind of tragedy
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also sorry for never shutting up about this but i got to gem's ep and after grian dies they keep saying he lasted so long because he had so many hearts. he had 2 rows. they understandably chalk it up to hearts but underestimate the sheer willpower of a rabid blood-covered creature backed into a corner frothing at the mouth and biting everything in sight
#i just feel like a proud mother for some reason sorry everyone#secret life spoilers#but fr the fact that this was what turned the tide#after a frankly incredible reign of terror#the army leader and her soldiers got whittled down#and then the mounders turned on them. just as cleo warned#butterfly effect goes ABSOLUTELY CRAZY#i eat this kind of thing up for breakfast#i love a tragedy that makes me go what if what if what if
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actually i think people need to talk about loki's myth kids more because what is that. he's got one kid so fast he can run through the air/over water, he's got one that's prophesized to be able to swallow the sun, a daughter ruler of the death realm, one that grows so big they leave him in the ocean and he just. wraps around the entire planet. ???
#the horse with many legs i kind of understand#i get how the horse could happen when one person is not an actual horse#of course there is going to be some sort of shapeshifting aberration happening#how big was angrboda because fenrir and jormugandr notable grow big#huge even#disastrously so#what kind of abnormal turn of events leads to 'prophecized to end the world' child#what kind of sex were they HAVING#because vali and narvi came out more normal. mostly.#i would think they were not assumed to end the world too but considering what was done to them who knows#myth loki#loki having like 6 very notable children... no one's doing it like that#shame for the tragedy though
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BIRTHDAYS FUCK FUCK FUCK
it was so hard to keep holding my tongue about that particular detail (i wrote a lot of miner's eulogy WHILE writing caged lungs so i Knew .... i knewwww) so i just alluded to it a bunch in responses BUT NOW I CAN YAP ALL I WANT ABOUT IT!!!! ahahaha FUCK!!!!!!!!! (in agony)
really its just a vehicle to push raph and leo to make that horrendous stupid ass decision at the end but i have not been able to stop thiiiinking about it. i love making leo and donnie be twins as a compromise/something they deliberately chose despite having a gap in age and that is exactly why. i get to use it for GREAT EVIL
#canary continuity#ask#i interpret their gap differently depending on the fic it really just depends on the vibe im going for#with coming undone i kind of imagine it to be a ten minute difference leo never shuts up about LOL#either way i know they always choose to be twins#also about the cc birthday thing: i have not decided if donnie will learn about it anyway yet#some things are better left unknown for him. they had a point with that#i dont think there was a right answer for the camera thing#but the conviction with the answer they chose was stupid and misplaced#because i guarantee it is going to have Nasty Consequences#between this and leo shutting down the idea of draxum coming around.... yeah he unknowingly caused some ISSUES#it was an act of love though. in every interpretation of the myth orpheus turns around out of love. thats the tragedy of it
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i love how kh games are just sometimes psychological horrors
#like#u forget it a little bit when playing bc its like haha disney and also like#the gameplay kind of breaks what the fuckness bc u got shit to do now#at least for me im like woah thats fucked up but i cant think too hard abt it bc im trying to finish the game#but its not until you like actively sit and think abt it or like even explaining it to someone else#where youre like god damn this is a tragedy and also a horror story#like fuck castle oblivion and all the horrors of com is like???#and then the prologue for kh2 is definitely a psychological horror#i see a lot of people praise sora and go aw hes so brave and strong when sora like#actively ignores literally anything bad that happens to him#like that one scene in neverland in kh1 where sora was like LITERALLY SO SAD AND UPSET ABT KAIRI#and then immediately does a u turn and is like omg i flew wait until i tell kairi :)#and some people are like aw hes being so brave and he has faith that kairi can come back and he can save her#and that made me so upset when i first saw that scene bc to me i was like immediately oh hes just repressing#or someone was even like what a good boy about him stabbing himself in the heart to save kairi#like yeah i love a self sacrifical 14 yr old#i guess cuz like. idk most stories that are like in the same genre as kh do make shit like this like a positive thing? like dont focus on th#the bad things stay positive and all that#and it works in those stories dont get me wrong i do like them and it works in the beginning of kh but like#then you notice that sora doesnt process literally anything#in the game that tells you repressing the negativity is a bad thing#like rikus whole story line staring you in the face and youre still saying sora being positive and Not Thinking about literally anything bad#is a good thing#and like i said it worked in the beginning! it worked as intended!! then weird and upsetting things started happening to sora and that shit#piles up!!!! and you can see it happen in real time and sora was cracking HARD in kh3 i dont think ive ever seen that kid so god damn sad#idk where i was going with this#oh yeah psychological horros#the parallels between data sora and real sora and the contrasts haunt me every day#michi tag
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we also like surface level liked how yuki's delusions and hallucinations were treated in school live. like she's cared for by the other girls and they all treat her with respect and compassion, and as long as she's not actively putting herself in danger they don't challenge her even though it has to be painful for them sometimes
#like how she talks to megu that had to be hard on kurumi and yuuri at first#like you just lost the only adult in this situation and then your friend just acts like it didnt happen and continues talking to her#especially for yuuri. that must have been rough#even though they did all end up appreciating the fact that yuki was able to stay so cheerful/normal#which btw isnt like a reflection of general treatment of psychosis its more of a our teacher turned into a zombie thing#anyways. just the way the most negative response/reaction yuki ever got from the girls was confusion or sadness#never anger or frusturation or hostility or anything#they just understood thats how yuki's brain works and did their best to keep her safe both physically and mentally/emotionally#and the way in the finale yuki recgonizes all this and says she cant let bad things happen to her friends#and that she knows how theyve been protecting her this whole time#just. aughh#like school live isnt some super progressive display of anti psych or anything#but just in the sense that it shows hallucinations and delusions being met with kindness and understanding#just. surface level. very good#AND its never used in a horror aspect even though its a horror series#like none of the horror comes from the fact that yuki is psychotic#maybe some tension between the girls or a stark contrast between yuki's perception and reality#but the fact that yuki hallucinates is never the horror itself. in fact its almost presented as a good thing#or at the very least a neutral thing. like how megu tells yuki to be quiet and hide with the zombie in the library#and her view of the world is what keeps her functioning#just. yeah#like we just like how its presented as just part of yuki as opposed to some tragedy or scary thing#confluence.txt#school life club#<- tag!
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Sukuna who was never close to his twin brother and never cared about the pipsqueak runt of a kid who’s his nephew.
He doesn’t care and doesn’t want to be associated with that bullshit. His brother doesn’t take the hint ever and invites him to everything. “My sons’s birthday party” this and “my son’s kindergarten graduation” that. What sort of graduation is meant for a kindergartener anyway? That’s a load of nonsense. But Jin is as annoying as ever with insisting on keeping contact and trying to get Sukuna involved and he hates it until by some tragedy out of nowhere, his brother and sister and law are dead. Yuuji’s left an orphan and no one can care for that kid because there’s no one left.
No one except Sukuna.
They ask him, too. The social workers. They turn to him and say some pitiful script about being “the only family left to take custody of him.” He knows pretty well what’s going to happen to the pipsqueak if he doesn’t agree. The foster care system and the possible horrors such a bright (even if annoying) kid could face makes him question saying no for a second. He’s surprisingly conflicted.
And it’s out of sheer impulsiveness alone does he end up as a single, grumpy, begrudging uncle who’s got custody of a child he never really cared to know in the first place.
And then he meets you.
Sweet, bubbly, warm, and so weirdly happy. Dictionary definition of what an elementary school teacher should be. Yuuji’s absolute favorite person on the planet as he waves hello at you enthusiastically every time that Sukuna drops him off and goodbye every time that Sukuna picks him up.
“I heard his new guardian would be his uncle. It’s nice to meet you,” you murmur to him the first day he picks up Yuuji after school, a look of pure melancholy on your face as you stare at him with an unearthly amount of compassion and sympathy. “Yuuji’s parents were wonderful people. I’m really sorry for your loss.”
“Wasn’t that close with either of them,” he grunts out. You look over at where Yuuji’s gleefully playing on the slide of the playground. Too young and innocent to realize that’s been ripped away from him. Too naive to understand what it means to grieve. Too hopeful about the world around him to realize just how cruel it can really be.
“Oh,” you murmur, nodding slowly.
He thinks that your unnaturally kind demeanor will finally be broken for a split second of judgement. What sort of heartless bastard doesn’t feel an ounce of grief for his own brother’s death? Instead, however, you seem to look at him with some weird sense of wonder.
“You’re a good uncle for stepping up regardless,” you say softly, “it’s more than what most would do in your shoes.”
“Yeah, whatever,” he clicks his teeth, unbearably uncomfortable with how weirdly sentimental this all is. “He’s just a five year old. How much trouble could he be?”
You raise a brow in amusement, eyeing him like he’s got one hell of a surprise waiting for him. He doesn’t like the vague way you hum, “Yeah. How could such a little human cause trouble, right?”
“I’ve got it under control,” he grumbles, a little annoyed that you seem to think that out of all things, a simple child would be enough to cause Sukuna any issues.
“Let me know if you need anything,” you smile.
Yuuji calls to you from the distance, squealing look what I can do! before he does a rather clumsy spin. Sukuna raises an unimpressed brow. You clap and praise him with an exaggerated gasp of approval.
It’s oddly endearing, he thinks to himself—you, not the kid. The kid’s barely tolerable.
“C’mon, you brat,” Sukuna calls. And then he looks at you and gruffly adds, “And I don’t need help.”
“Okay,” you grin brightly. It almost feels like you’re saying that a little sarcastically. “I’m sure you’ve got this parent thing down.”
Before he can even correct you that he’s an uncle, not parent, Yuuji comes running over on clumsy, short little legs and grabs onto Sukuna’s hand.
“C’mon, Uncle ‘Kuna!”
Sukuna doesn’t miss the way your eyes soften. Weirdly enough, he feels this odd sort of squeeze in his chest that doesn’t make any sense. Maybe he’s just getting old—that has to be it.
#sukuna x reader#sukuna fluff#sukuna x you#ryomen sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna fluff#ryomen sukuna x you#jjk x reader#jjk x you#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujutsu kaisen fluff#euthymiya.writing
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he is watching an eldritch behemoth eat the people that he loves and there is nothing he can do, there is nothing he can do, there is nothing he can do--
*shaking you by the shoulders* don’t you understand that Relvin Temult's life is a tragedy?? The he knew Liliana was going to go somewhere else one day but he thought he'd be enough for her to want him with her and then he wasn't and she slipped away piece by piece until she was gone?? that he didn't want Imogen to be haunted by the same things as her mother but was utterly powerless to stop it and thought the best he could do was shield her from the little information he DID know before whatever got ahold of Liliana sunk its claws into her too?? that he watched imogen slip away, piece by piece and then all at once, just like her mother, and now there's no need for extra kitchen chairs because there's no one to have dinner with anymore so why bother??? have you read Our Wives Under The Sea????? You understand
#still thinking about this#also just how weirdly perfect our wives under the sea is to explain this specific kind of tragedy#bizarrely great comparison tbh#it's about being left behind. it's about being the one who DOESN'T have some grand destiny. it's about witnessing it happen to others#it's about watching destiny eat up people you love and spit them out different and (in some cases) wrong#and having to hold them while they turn to water in your hands
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SV fic where Shen Yuan rationally decides to be gay. For rational, strategic reasons. He has to do it.
Reason 1: every woman in the world has pretty much been reserved for the protagonist. trying to get with anyone would seal his fate as a rival, on top of a villain! he's basically either got to spend the rest of his life a bachelor or find another option.
Reason 2: obviously as a straight man Shen Yuan would prefer the bachelor option, but that's just leaving him wide open to attacks! Shen Qingqiu already did a poor job of cementing any alliances, having no family to speak of and pissing off the majority of his sect siblings. frankly he's left Shen Yuan in a bind that only some kind of concrete financial and social alliance could solve!
Reason 3: no man wants to die a virgin, right?
Reason 4: increasingly progressive standards in fiction have actually made it gauche to kill off openly gay characters. while a stallion novel might still go in that direction, it's not like he could make his fate much worse, so it's worth a shot, right?
anyway this all leads to Shen Yuan carefully reconstructing the image of Shen Qingqiu into the token complicated gay character. obviously he's not going to put the moves on any of his disciples (he doesn't want to fall into those gay stereotypes!), but to cement the image of himself as a gay man he's going to need to put the moves on someone.
it's a shame that the OG was so well-established in his enmity towards the sect leader. Yue Qingyuan seems like he might have at least entertained such interest, although he's also more of a brotherly type and probably not gay, so perhaps it's for the best in the long run.
luckily, another option falls right into Shen Qingqiu's lap (almost literally!) when he saves Liu Qingge from a qi deviation.
Liu Qingge is actually the perfect target for an unrequited crush. it recontextualizes some of his and the original's enmity, Liu Qingge was dead in the original story so it's not likely to mess up anything worse than him just being alive does, Liu Qingge is beautiful enough that it's believable anyone would be secretly in love with him, and a war god is almost certainly straight, which gives Shen Qingqiu time to adjust to the idea of living as a gay man for the rest of his (hopefully long) life. y'know, before he finds an actual gay to partner with!
the only downside is that coming on to Liu Qingge might discourage him from protecting Shen Qingqiu and repaying his debt in the long run. luckily, that doesn't seem to be the case! despite his face frequently turning red (from anger?) and him sometimes literally fleeing at Shen Qingqiu's awkward attempts at flirting, Liu Qingge never misses an appointment to cleanse his meridians, and seems to take his safety and well-being very seriously.
what an honorable man!
shame that Luo Binghe doesn't seem to like him, though. Shen Qingqiu's not sure what to make of all that. that's your future brother-in-law, Binghe! at least make an attempt to win him over! oh well. at least he's not ruining a relationship between in-laws that otherwise could have been good, as he makes extra sure to subtly bemoan, in front of Luo Binghe, the tragedy of his deep unrequited love for Liu Qingge. for like the third time that week.
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𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐋𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐄𝐌𝐏𝐈𝐑𝐄 !
- gojo satoru x reader // zen'in naoya x reader
the path of love is never easy for you, be it now or back then. love, pain, betrayal and tragedy — you have been through them all. after all is said and done, you just want one chance at happiness. so will your second marriage be what you always want it to be, or will it be one last heartbreak you have to go through?
genre/warnings: 18+ suggestive content—minors do not interact!—might be ooc, angst, hurt/comfort, a lot of fluff, marriage of convenience, explicit smut (semi-public sex), pregnancy, childbirth, mentions of curses
note: loosely inspired by and taking some elements of manhwa remarried empress. this is the final part of remarried empress au trilogy! wc. 9.4k ! i'm so happy with how well-received this little series is :') thank you so, so much for reading!
credit header goes to @/poro06625649 in twitter!
prev. all hail the empress | the crown of diamonds
general masterlist | series masterlist
“Satoru...”
Once, to you, love meant complete acceptance. To be able to accept someone so wholly, unquestionably, as they are.
Until you excelled in everything, a stone throw away from perfection even, and Naoya still spurned you.
When you married Satoru out of sheer impulse just to preserve your standing, you thought you had found that kind of love at last. Until it became clear a part of him wanted something else, and you couldn't accept that.
At the same time, you also felt like a hypocrite, because you wanted that love for you, and yet you couldn't give the same to him and even doubted him altogether. Using each other, you had even said.
But right at this moment... none of that mattered anymore.
Not when Satoru forcefully hurled Suguru aside, fought his way through the searing heat, tearing away debris after debris, punching through the remnants of the collapsing pagoda, all while dreadfully screaming your name.
“Where are you!? Gods, answer me!” He looked like a desperate madman. He was hyperventilating, bloodied, and yet he kept violently flinging the debris, determined to find you.
That sight of him struck you straight in the heart. He could've obliterated the whole tower with his ability if he wanted to, but he didn't. Doing so would seal your fate entirely.
He yelled your name once again, pouring his anguish and frustration into the air that his voice grew hoarse. “Where are you!”
If this isn't love, you thought almost tearfully. Then what is?
“Satoru!” and so you forced yourself to walk, despite being on the verge of collapse. Seeing him like this tore your heart to shreds. “Satoru!”
He stopped abruptly, his chest still heaving violently before turning to you. At first, he thought it was the voice inside his head. Everything around him was a chaotic blur, so when he turned to find you standing there, miraculously unharmed, he was stunned.
A shuddering breath escaped him as he gazed at you, the blue in his eyes filled with so much fright you had never seen before. "Y/N...?"
You staggered on your feet, your dress appearing singed at the edges—but you were there, alive.
"What are you doing!?" you admonished, almost in tears. "Why do you hurt yourself like that!?"
Suddenly, it was hard to breathe, but he didn't hesitate. He flung the splinter in his hand away and sprinted towards you, roughly pulling you into his arms.
"—!" he rasped, almost gasping for air, while squeezing the back of your head closer. "Heavens, I thought... I thought you were—!"
Satoru was trembling so badly in your embrace, unable to utter another word as he buried his face in your shoulder. He was beyond shaken—grunting, taking sharp breaths, and holding you so tightly that it left you at a loss of words.
He only pulled back once, albeit shakily, to have a good look of your face. There was one bruise on your cheek and you were covered in soot.
But you were still the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.
"I'm fine..." you tried reassuring him, lips wobbling, placing a hand on his palm that touched your face. "I'm fine now..."
Then Satoru pulled you close again, and you came willingly. Simply holding you, he inhaled the scent of the roses mixed with ash in your hair, feeling your breath on his neck.
To see this man, usually so self-assured, reduced to such a mess out of fear for you touched you deeply. You nestled closer to him, feeling a sense of peace wash over you.
In that moment, as you two clung to each other, nothing else matters.
"You've always coveted what I have..."
The ice in your eyes and the chill in your words felt like a curse. Hanabi was beside herself every day ever since she had left Western Empire. No way, she even saw you in her dreams!
Granted, her impulsiveness had almost cost her everything. She shouldn't have placed that curse on the necklace— she shouldn't have dared to attempt it in the first place.
But seeing that piece that had tied you two together—the testament to Naoya's remaining affection for you, however small it was—made Hanabi burn with jealousy. Why did he remember you still? Hadn't he dethroned you and chosen her?
Also, why did you put it as if she had been trying to take all that you had? She was now a royal consort, she was just demanding what she was due!
"...and sooner or later, that will be your downfall."
Hanabi shivered as an intense chill seemed to enter her body, spreading rapidly to her limbs and brain, immobilizing her. What is it? Why are your words struck her to the core?
"My lady, are you alright?" her attendant walked up to her as she clutched her chest.
"I-I..." Hanabi faltered, trying to even her breath. "I'm not feeling that well..."
"Shall I get the physician? You do look pale..."
"Please do."
Damn you. The more she thought about it, the angrier she became. You must've cursed her, that must be it! Why else did she keep hearing your voice?
"Sending you back to Naoya is a punishment in itself—you know that by now."
No, she had come this far. Even if she couldn't have Naoya's favor, even if she couldn't become the empress... she would fight tooth and nail to remain a consort.
After all, all her life, she was meant for this.
. . .
And true to her conviction... once again, fortune favors the bold.
"My lady, congratulations! You're with child!"
Hanabi blinked at the cheerful royal physician as he delivered the news. "R-really? Are you... sure?"
"Certainly! Oh, this is great news! The emperor will surely be delighted by this news!"
For a full minute, Hanabi sat there, stunned in amazement. She had really done it, and if it was a boy this time, then...
"Aha..." she burst into a small titter then, before breaking into a full-blown laugh. "Ahahaha!"
You're wrong, Empress Y/N. This time, I will show you.
"Congratulations, my lady!" the ladies around her gathered, showering her with praises. And Hanabi knew that finally, her time had come.
True paradise begins in hell. And now, I've risen from that hell.
Contrary to what you told Satoru, you were, in fact, not fine.
Shoko was the one who led you out of the burning pagoda, sustaining burns herself in the process. Immediately after you found Satoru, who was frantically on the verge of losing his sanity searching for you, you collapsed in his arms.
You had inhaled a significant amount of smoke, there was a gash in your arm, and you were even bleeding due to the stress.
And therefore, you were put on bedrest for the next upcoming weeks by the royal physician's orders and by extension, Satoru's.
However, during those three weeks, Satoru never visited you even once.
. . .
"Are you sure you're well enough to be walking around already?"
After being confined to your bedchamber for what felt like forever, you decided to take a stroll in the royal gardens. Shoko was the one in charge of watching you like a hawk these days. She didn't usually follow you around—you noticed she often went out on her own—but lately, she insisted on being by your side.
"Mm-hmm, I'm perfectly well now, Shoko," you gave her a smile as you admired the blue roses in the bushes. "You don't have to keep an eye on me all the time. I'm feeling better already."
You would be lying if you said you didn't miss your husband. A part of you of course wanted Satoru to check on you, or at least, your baby. Three weeks had passed, and your belly was now rounder and heavier.
"Oh, well... That's good then..."
Shoko seemed a bit unsure, frowning even, and you had your guesses, so you decided to bite the bullet. "How is Satoru these days?"
"Eh?"
"You must've seen him. He isn't avoiding you like he does me."
"Your Majesty..." Shoko let out a long sigh, seemingly exasperated and sorry at the same time, and you knew you hit the mark with it. "He's well, don't worry too much about him."
"Is he taking enough breaks?"
"He— err, I'm not really sure about that."
"Then, next time you see him, along with my general condition, tell him that I want him to do so."
You didn't mean to make Shoko uncomfortable, and if you did, then it was most definitely not what you intended. You just wanted a way to communicate with your brooding husband, that was all.
"You absolute imbecile! This is beyond ridiculous, why are you refusing to meet your own wife and talk to her?!"
If it had been anyone other than Countess Shoko, they would have certainly been hanged for their outrageous words against the emperor.
Satoru actually felt bitter for not visiting you ever since that day of the fire. Truth to be told, he was worried sick, the terror of thinking you might have perished in the blaze still lingered with him to this day.
He wanted nothing more than to hug you and bury his face in yours. He genuinely wanted you to be well and safe, always. Preferably, if he could keep you close too.
So, why did he avoid you on purpose?
First, the utter awkwardness. Second, the very fact that you had allowed those scums from Eastern Empire to be released. He still couldn't accept it, no matter how. In his eyes, you did it out of love for Naoya.
And that, in and of itself, was like a betrayal of his heart.
"She is becoming unhappy," Shoko noted earlier, frustration evident in her tone. "And on some nights, she also experiences hip pains due to carrying your baby. You're heartless if you don't even come to look at her even once!"
But then, Satoru felt as if he'd been punched in the gut. His unborn child.
...he had left you more or less alone now, hadn't he?
In reality, you preferred the secluded comfort of your study over the royal gardens.
And yet, that beloved study Satoru gifted you on the day he married you and you became the empress of Western Empire felt constricting lately. You almost felt claustrophobic.
Maybe it was the burgundy walls, or perhaps it was the sting of bitterness in your chest that you tried to suppress so others wouldn't see. You didn't really care which though.
So, you often wandered through the gardens to enjoy the fresh air, and at times, stopping by the spot where the pagoda once stood.
Nothing. Now that was all that left. The image of a once-beautiful tower reduced to dust and the scorched earth evoked a sense of loss within you, and what made it more painful was knowing that you were the one responsible for its destruction.
But still, what hurt the most was... what had happened to the man who had trembled with fear, believing you might not have escaped the burning pagoda? Why had he spared you with nothing at all?
"Meow..."
You looked at the squirming cat in your arms, his fluffy tail tickling you. "Oh, Sugu-chan, do you want to take a walk too?"
The clear blue eyes of Satoru's pet cat looked back at you demurely before he leapt out of your arms and trotted ahead, as if leading the way.
With nothing better to occupy your time, you often played with Sugu-chan to amuse yourself these days. The cat, with its gentle disposition, frequently curled up next to you for comfort and he somehow made those days better.
"Sugu-chan, don't stray too far!" you called out, trailing closely behind him. Knowing well that you weren't well enough to chase after him should he run off, you watched to ensure he didn't disappear from sight. "Oh!"
And sigh, he did just that. Sugu-chan leapt into the bushes, prompting you to release a resigned breath before navigating through the maze-like foliage.
"Sugu-chan, where are youuu?" you drew a breath, glancing around in confusion. "If only you were calmer like your namesake..."
After navigating several corners, you turned another and spotted a fluffy white fur, and you swore to the skies that you would yank Sugu-chan by his tail if he were to wander off again, when—
"Meooow!"
"Bad, bad cat! Why did you bite me—!?"
—and there you saw your husband, crouching down as he clutched his hand, before he whipped his head to look at you—
"Satoru," you straightened your back by instinct, your heartbeat quickening.
His eyes turned blank for a second, before those blue pools regarded you with a look you couldn't really discern. "Y/N."
. . .
It was awkward silence throughout the way. You didn't even realize when you had arrived at Satoru's study.
You had wanted this unsettling atmosphere between you to end. Why couldn't both of you just be honest already? You were about to voice your thoughts when suddenly Satoru, who had his back on you, suddenly said:
"I will not have a scandal. Therefore, you will behave in a way that nothing is known against you. In return, you will retain your privileges as the empress of the Western Empire, and continue to fulfill your duties."
That? That's the first thing he said to you after those weeks sonorous silence? This stiff, faux nonsense of him pardoning you of your supposed treason?
"Is that all you have to say to me?" you blurted almost immediately, feeling your anger rising. "After everything—"
"After everything— yes." Satoru's back was still facing you, his light blue robes shifted slightly as he tucked his hands inside his pocket pants. "Despite everything, I have nothing but concern for you, Empress. And your act of treason— even if you take no offense, I still consider it a stain on my name to let a pair of criminals go free. Consider it my generosity that I decided to overlook it."
Your body felt like shaking, his strained and formal words irked you, and at the same time, pierced through your heart and tore it to pieces.
"I've told you— I can't let Megumi be condemned for a deed he hasn't committed," you stated firmly, staring hard at his back as if you could bore a hole through him. "He is a kind boy, he used to be my ward. And you know as well as I do, he isn't capable of such a thing!"
"What about that consort—the woman who overtook your place?" he suddenly turned to face you, and the expression on his face almost made you shrink. There was no emotions in his eyes, just a dark hue of blue. "She was the one staging it, wasn't she?"
"I'm not vindictive enough to sentence her to her death here, Satoru." The more you argued about this, the more you felt like you were losing him. "Naoya will deal with her as he sees fit."
The mention of your ex-husband seemed to trigger something in him that his lips curled into a sneer.
"So much trust you place in him. As I thought, I should've never expected the same for me. Granted, we're just using each other, aren't we?"
Your own words thrown back at you, it felt like your shattered heart was being stomped on and reduced to dust, because how could he?
Still, you blinked away your tears, steeling yourself with the one fact even Satoru wouldn't be able to refute. "You said it yourself—you intend to use me for your war against the Eastern Empire. How am I not supposed to see that as you using me?"
You let out a scoff when Satoru wasn't able to answer you, but then suddenly it occurred to you that there might be another reason, one you had suspected, and yet still not able to make sense of.
"I'd think jealousy is insulting to you, so why?" you questioned, suddenly feeling a sense of betrayal. "Why is it that you can't believe that I can love you the same way I did Naoya? Or possibly even more?"
To Satoru, that very thought still felt like a thorn inside his chest. How you managed to see through him almost made his facade falter—
"And if you feel that it's unfair to you how you're the one who keeps proving yourself—then tell me," you suddenly demanded with a gritted teeth. "How am I supposed to believe you've loved me when I know marrying me came at just the right time for your goals?"
"That's not true!" he suddenly raised his voice, all pretentiousness forgotten. Right in this moment, to your surprise, he no longer resembled the cold, distant emperor he seemed to be.
“From the very moment you led me by the hand twenty years ago, I’ve longed for you! And now that I finally have you— it goes beyond mere infatuation or obsession! Heavens help me, but fuck it— I love you so damn much!”
It was everything. Satoru had poured his entire heart out in one go, believing it would be enough, until he saw you trembling, visibly holding back tears.
Your pretty eyes widened as you took in his confession. Your precious lips parted slightly, wobbling in effort to hold yourself together—
—until you felt light all of a sudden, as if the boulder in your heart had came crashing down, as if you had let go of all fears, and a small chuckle escaped you.
"You said, the woman you thought to have a semblance of affection for you doesn't exist," your voice was uneven but you tried so hard to sound clear, a relieved smile forming on your lips. "But she does. I do."
“I love you, Satoru.” The first of your tears fell then, and your voice came out in a sob. “I believe I love you. I'm the happiest while being with you. And so, to hear you say that I'm just a part of your plans makes me so incredibly sad, I—”
“I just want… the honest truth from you.” You took a deep breath to steady yourself, your eyes glistening like diamonds as you fought back the tears.
He swore something inside him twisted and bled at your voice, and suddenly, nothing else mattered—
Not when you have bared everything.
Before he could think, he took two decisive strides towards you and pulled you into his arms.
"Don't cry..." he pulled you tighter into him. "I'm sorry— don't cry, sweetheart, please—"
You kept sniffling into him, and Satoru felt his heart break then, as never had he seen you so utterly dejected that you surrendered in his arms.
How was it possible that the mere realization and sight of your genuine affection and tears reduced him to a man who would give up everything for you?
“It’s true, I have been planning to wage war against Eastern Empire for years. I took measures to keep them in check, and I do think having you by my side would definitely give me an advantage. But that’s not it... when I saw how you were being wronged there, I was even more convinced it was the rightest thing to do.”
He loves you. Even if he had committed various things, be it heinous or deceptive, one truth that transcends all is that his love for you is genuine.
“You mean so much to me,” he whispered into your ear, his hand tracing along your spine. “Everything else might be true, but you— no, I have loved you first before everything.”
Oh. You looked up to him, finding his clear, steadfast gaze on you. So this is how he is like when he isn’t hiding behind that crafty smile. When he is being most truthful.
The overflowing emotions obliterated whatever doubts you had left. You felt full. A profound, pervasive sense of love radiated through your myriad thoughts.
And to him, nothing was more liberating than knowing that you returned his love with equal fervor.
You felt bliss... utter bliss.
You didn't really know when you fell asleep, but it felt like the best rest you had in ages. For weeks, you had been waking up in the middle of the night, either in cold sweat or feeling tingling, barely-there stabs in your growing belly. On those nights, you would clutch the pillow beside you for comfort.
But tonight, you felt warm, and the first thing you noticed was Satoru's hair right in your face. He had laid his head above your chest, and his fingers were gently stroking your visible bump.
"Satoru...?" you asked sleepily, and he immediately turned to you in slight surprise.
"Did I wake you?" he looked almost alarmed. "Or do you feel any kind of pain or—?"
"No, just—" and you bit your lip when that familiar stab of pain shot through your hips. Your hand pressed against the spot as you let out a small grunt.
"Hey, what do you feel now?" Satoru immediately moved beside you, capturing you in the warmth of his embrace. "Does it hurt much? Do I need to call for—"
"No need to, it's fine—"
"It's not fine," he firmly retorted, his jaw set in a tight line. "The royal physician will come here first thing in the morning and that's final."
A faint smile formed in your lips as you curled closer and sighed contentedly into him. "Whatever you wish then, Your Majesty."
Satoru took that as a hint of sarcasm, but he simply pressed you closer and placed his warm hand over the spot where your hand rested. "Shoko told me. How long have you been enduring this?"
"Fairly recently, actually. A few weeks or so..."
I never knew. He berated himself because how would he be aware of this when he had completely shut you down? The stress must've gotten to you, and you were so delicate right now...
"Sorry," he sighed into your hair, his voice so quiet it was almost unheard. "From now on, everything that makes you uncomfortable, please tell me."
You looked up at him, searching his face, and when your innocent eyes met his, he relented.
"I'll do everything in my power to ensure you have a smooth journey in delivering our child." His words, sharp yet genuine, made your heart nearly leap out of your chest. "I hate seeing you in any sort of discomfort."
He fretted over you this much and yet he used to think you wouldn't show him the same affection in return. That was so ridiculous when you thought about it now.
"Ah," you giggled freely, wrapping your arms tight around him, and Satoru was taken aback at how that simple affirmation from you made something inside him feel lighter.
His endearing queen, who loved him back, now right in his arms. As he massaged your waist, he thought back to many years of careful planning and schemes, just for one particular goal...
“Not anymore,” he told you quietly, and you sleepily blinked your eye open. “I love you too much to break your heart.”
“Hmm?”
You were puzzled, and could feel his hot breath at such a close distance. And then those blue crystal of eyes met yours, full of warmth, and the corners of his lips curved into a soft smile, one that caught you by the heart.
“I’m made of many things. The emperor of this land, a soldier of many ambitions... but in the end, just a man.” His voice was languid and yet so gentle that it almost lulled you to sleep again. “If it were up to me, I’d have no qualms with warring the Eastern Empire. But now... I no longer wish to do that.”
Anticipation surged within you at his words, but still...
Noticing your reluctance, Satoru pinched your cheek and smiled. "It's not what you want. I thought I could proceed with it even if it'd leave you heartbroken... but apparently I can't."
And with his next proclamation, you knew without a doubt that this time, they were truer than anything else.
“And do you know? Because I love you, I’m willing to do anything for you. Mark my words, my queen— From now on... Heaven and earth, I would give it all to you.”
"Mm..." Whether it was your hormones or the sheer sincerity that shone through his words, tears were brimming in your eyes as Satoru gave you his oath. "Thank you... for thinking of me."
"Anything for you, sweetheart." He dipped his head to press a kiss on your lips and you were about to snuggle closer to him when you felt that familiar flutter and suddenly let out a gasp—
"Satoru!" you exclaimed, almost startling him, but you immediately reached out and placed his hand on your belly. "Feel it!"
And then, his eyes widened slightly. It was the most wondrous moment he had ever experienced in his life as he felt the baby inside you kick and ripple beneath his palm.
"Ah..." he exhaled the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. "Baby... she moves..."
The very idea of a precious baby girl that was an exact replica of you suddenly made his heart lurch. Satoru swore in that moment to protect her with his life... he didn't know it was possible, but he was already in love with her even when she wasn't born yet.
"Why are you so sure it's a girl?" you teased, wrapping your arms around his neck and smooched his jaw when he was rendered speechless. "I want a boy, you know."
Satoru snapped out of his trance and sullenly huffed. "I still hope it's a girl. I want a princess I can spoil rotten."
"I want a baby boy who looks like you." Your sincere wish surprised him, and he turned to you in bewilderment. "That way, even when you're away, I won't miss you as much since I still have the little prince near me."
"Ha." Satoru feigned a snort to cover the faint blush steadily gathering in his cheeks. Good heavens, how cute was it that he wanted a girl who resembled you and you wanted a boy just so he'd look like him? He was so giddy that he failed to come up with a witty comeback for you.
Pure bliss. After everything, this is your life from now on.
Shoko stood in front of your chambers the next morning, her heels clacking like a ticking watch of doom.
Unlike the everlasting frown etched on her face, she was actually in a dilemma, debating her choices outside your chambers. It was late morning already, but she'd hate to go in if you were not alone.
If she went ahead and caught you with Gojo on your bed—and worse, naked—with her own eyes... no, it was unthinkable what the sight would do to her. She would never recover. She would spew unforgivable profanities and Gojo might have her banished for real.
"What are you doing?"
Shoko whirled around so fast to suppress her shriek, and shot a look of distaste as soon as she saw who was behind her—Duke Geto. "Don't sneak up on me like that! You're not small like Sugu-chan!"
Suguru, prim and neat with his tied bun and black robes, raised one eyebrow, clearly swallowing any comments regarding the cat. "What are you doing, loitering in the hallway?"
"The empress hasn't woken up yet, and it's nearly midday. She has engagements with the master of tea parties later."
"Don't bother. Satoru's there. He'll most likely tell you that her schedule can be rearranged, and his word is law."
Shoko barked a laugh and Suguru too broke into a smile.
"So, they're good now?"
"Yeah... seems so."
"Thank fuck. Gojo owes me one for this."
The two friends chuckled again, relieved to know that the cold war between both of you had ceased.
Suguru leaned against the wall, his eyes crinkled at a memory. "Don't you remember those days, when Satoru used to watch the empress at each and every ball we attended, back when she was still the crown princess?"
Shoko crossed her arms, letting out a loud snort. "Oh yes. Everyone talked about him. The prince smitten by a rival country's betrothed... his reputation took a hit, but he never cared."
"I never took him seriously until recently. He was so adamant in his plans for the East that I thought... maybe it was all just to realize his war plans."
"Geto... don't tell me," the countess eyed her longtime friend incredulously. "Have not seen enough of the empress' paintings hanging in the halls? Is that not convincing enough for you?"
Throughout almost one year of your marriage, Satoru had commissioned at least five paintings of you to hang in the palace halls. Servants, members of parliament, and peerage must have seen at least one of your pictures whenever they turned a corner.
"If that's not stupidly in love, I didn't know what that is." Shoko shook her head with a smile. "Gojo has been spellbound for like years. I just never thought he'd really have her in the end though."
Suguru and Shoko had been by Satoru’s side for many years. Suguru was the closest to him still, and he had seen his friend for everything he was.
And knowing that Satoru was genuine in choosing this path, all Suguru could do was be happy for him.
“Life always has its ways… heh, I suppose all’s well that ends well.”
SOME MONTHS LATER . . .
"There, there, Sugu-chan!"
Suguru flinched. Satoru snickered.
"Meow!"
And you continued to tickle the white cat happily, seated a few feet away from both of them with a broad grin on your face.
"Should... Her Majesty be so close to the cat?" Suguru eventually asked, casting a skeptical gaze on you. The presence of the feline was certainly not what he expected when he entered Satoru's study per his summons. "It's dirty often and may affect her health."
"No, no... I never let him walk outside anymore and he has to be cleaned all times before the empress plays with him." Satoru's sly smile was a clear sign of taunt. "Suguru~ Won't you play with him too?"
Suguru shot him a withering look, his eyes twitching again the moment you addressed the cat by his childhood nickname.
"Oh, Sugu-chan, you're so gentle..." you exclaimed with a giggle. Your fingers gently scratched the cat's chin and behind his ears, causing him to purr happily and roll onto his back.
"Meooow~"
"Anyway, why did you call me here?" Suguru let out a sigh, disregarding the background noises and leveled a questioning look at his friend and ruler of the country.
"Hmm, nothing of importance actually, my cat just misses you is all," Satoru shrugged nonchalantly and Suguru really was about to pop a vein at his blatant response.
He then threw a sharp glance towards the pet and Sugu-chan immediately let out a dissatisfied hiss. This was always the way since the first day Satoru adopted him.
"Your cat, evidently, dislikes me at first sight."
"That's because he senses your animosity!"
Seeing how uncomfortable the duke looked, you suppressed a laugh and scooped up the feline into your arms. "Forgive me, Duke Geto. It's my idea to bring you here since I'm curious how you'd react if you and Sugu-chan are in the same room..."
...well, if it was your wish, who was he to deny it? Satoru would come for his head first should he do so.
You winked. "I'll bring him out for a walk, feel free to talk to your heart's content."
"Don't overexert yourself," Satoru warned, his playful expression towards him shifting to a concerned look for you, surprising Suguru in the process. "If walking is too much, take a rest."
"Yes, yes... I'll be fine~"
Satoru never took his eyes off you until you left his study, and Suguru couldn't help but smile.
"The way you always soften around her will never fail to surprise me," he noted with a hint of amusement.
"Then get surprised all your life because that's all I will do," he retorted with a proud smirk. "Oh right... how is the progress for the new courtyard?"
To replace the pagoda lost in your incident, Satoru came up with another gift for you—a private courtyard for your own personal pleasure. It still remained a secret from you, with Suguru tasked to oversee its construction.
"It's expected to be done before the empress' birthday, don't worry."
"Good..." His lips curved with satisfaction, before a blush tinted his cheeks. "And by then, the baby must've already..."
You were far along now, evident from how your dresses were no longer able to hide the curve of your swollen belly. He was to become a father soon, and anyone could see how elated Satoru was.
And suddenly he fixed his sharp gaze on his friend. "And Suguru, what about the other thing I asked? Have you looked into it?"
"Yeah...?"
"Zen'in Naoya's wench—" Satoru's eyes glinted with something akin to malice, as he still had that smile. "What did you find about her?"
Royal Consort Hanabi. A while ago, he also asked him to investigate her background, and Suguru almost forgot about it if he hadn't asked.
"Prior working as a palace servant, she was a former maid for Duke Kamo. As with all servants there, she was not treated kindly."
"Kamo? Interesting..."
The Kamo clan used to sit at Eastern Empire's throne up until Naoya's ancestors usurped it. Now, the heir remained a wealthy duke, and it was well-known that the fates of anyone who crossed him didn't end well.
Satoru hummed, barking a snort. "Well, I suppose that's it then. Suguru, proceed as is."
"I really thought you were done with any of your revenge plans." Suguru really didn't want to bring it up but he wasn't sure if this would bode well.
"I've given up on spilling blood, because that's not what my queen wants..." Satoru's smile froze on his face, yet his eyes sparkled. "But that doesn't mean I'll let that lowly bitch go unscathed. Our empress might be a saint and have chosen to spare her, but I most certainly am not as forgiving."
The chilly white light of the chandelier above him cast an eerie glow on Emperor Gojo Satoru at that moment, and Suguru almost shuddered.
"Didn't I tell you before? Anyone who dares to lay their hands on my empress... they have to pay the price."
Meanwhile in the Eastern Empire's palace, the royal consort still was the object of everyone's praises as of late.
It was almost astonishing how well she was treated recently, all because she was carrying the emperor's child, Hanabi thought with irony. So this was her life now.
Valued when she is able please the emperor, discarded when she fails to do so.
Sometimes it made her wonder, if it were still you in her place, would you be treated the same way? Or would you always be revered just like you were, unconditionally?
No matter. Her thoughts always leaned towards comparing herself with you, despite how much she hated it. Yet it was no use thinking of it now.
After all, now Naoya was in her arms.
She couldn't help but marvel at the sight of his sharp eyebrows and jaw. Hanabi had always thought, he was most handsome when he was vast asleep, when he wasn't hurling profanities at her or anyone else.
At first, she just wanted his love, and then a happy ending. She was never audacious enough to covet the empress' seat. But now she had to, after what you said to her.
"...that will be your downfall."
How could you? How dare you? Hanabi had gone through so much, who are you to dictate how her fates will turn out?
She now carried a son. She had even gone to an oracle to make sure of it. Soon, she would be the empress of this empire, and you would be forced to regard her as an equal.
And she was very much looking forward to that day…
Safe to say... you have long since thrown away any thoughts regarding the one woman who isn't worth a second of your time in your blissful days...
“Satoru, hng— ahh!” a lustful, provocative moan escaped your lips as you bucked your hips against his lips—face—and all the while, you weren’t even properly dressed.
But your emperor of a husband insisted on dipping his head inside your thin bathrobe and devouring you right on the staircase leading to the bathing chamber.
“Ah—aah—hah!” you threw your head back, spreading your legs impossibly wider around his shoulder, as you felt his lips licking your drenched nub.
You wanted so badly to see him, but weren’t able to do so as not only your belly had become such a dome that hindered you from seeing your lower half, Satoru hiding under your robes meant you wouldn’t be able to see him at all.
And so, all you could do was feel, feel and feel.
Feel how sticky wet your womanhood was, feel how his hair was tickling your thighs, and feel how as he eagerly sucked and nipped at you, it almost made you see stars—
“Satoru, the servants… mmrngh! Can walk in!” you tried to reason and yet failing at the same time as a shuddering pleasure washed over you like a rising tide.
“So be it,” came Satoru’s daring reply from underneath. “Let them see… and I’ll tell them— this is how their empress comes to be s-so swollen… with the fruit of my labors!”
You moaned again unabashedly, not even bothering to hold it back as the noises you made echoed throughout the hall, your fingers curling and clawing at the marbled tiles.
And soon, you couldn’t hold it in anymore as you came around his tongue.
“Ah…” you writhed breathlessly, feeling how your cum helplessly gushing out, limp against the stairs. Your body jerked, and cramped as you felt him taking in everything that came out of you.
When he was done, Satoru gently removed your light robe and embraced you, taking in every detail. He admired the cascade of your hair over your shoulder, the softness of your skin—seemingly even softer in recent months—and how your body gracefully accommodated the baby.
So heavy with his child… and yet it only roused his desires.
“Look at you, do I tire you out?” he chuckled, licking the remnants of your juice off his lips. You shot him an unamused look and poked his chest in response.
“Here, let me clean you up...”
After cleaning you, he gathered you and brought you to the bath tub, submerging both of you in the warm water.
Satoru pulled you close from behind, wrapping his arms around your upper body, gently kissing your neck.
“You’re so affectionate,” you giggled as you caressed his cheek. “I had half a mind that you’d be repulsed with how big I’ve become, and yet you never stray far from my bed.”
“Nonsense. Your chamber is the temple and I worship any ground you walk on.”
“You’re not worshipping me?”
“I do more than just worship you, my goddess.” Satoru drawled out with a lazy smile, burning a wet kiss on your face. “You know that.”
At this moment, you felt warm and fulfilled, resigning yourself to your husband's arms with a contented sigh... until you let out a low hiss when you felt the familiar pounding from inside your belly.
"Shh," Satoru warm hand pressed on the protruding spot in your bump, soothing you. "There, there... don't hurt your mama, hmm?"
Soon, you'd have your baby in your arms, and your heart melted at the very thought. That little baby would soon be running the palace halls, bringing joy to this empire.
"You know I'd protect you from anything and everything," your husband said to you in a whisper, lovingly breathing in your scent. "So my only wish for you is to deliver the baby safely. Afterwards, leave the rest to me, hmm?"
I don't want to lose you. That was clearly the fear behind his words. Satoru's grip on you tightened and you kissed his arm, reassuring him.
After everything you went through, this would be your happy ending, and you would do whatever it takes to win it.
And then the day comes —
Your labor pains started at the crack of dawn, and you were immediately brought to the birthing chambers afterwards.
Even within the confines of your chambers, your cries echoed through the halls. Shoko and several of your maids stayed with you inside, while the Archbishop guarded the entrance.
"It's almost a day and a half," Satoru muttered restlessly, unable to go on with his day as he paced outside. He had been with you when you woke up to your waters breaking, and he hadn't been able to think straight since.
A maid rushed outside with bloodied towels and he immediately stopped her. "How is the empress? Is she alright?"
The petrified maid bowed her head. "Her Majesty is losing blood, Your Majesty!"
He lost all reasons that very moment. "I have to come inside—!"
"You can't be in there, Your Majesty!" Archbishop Yaga sternly forbid, standing in his way. "It's women's business inside—you should be ready when they announced the birth of the child!"
Satoru's eyes twitched with fury and he was really about to drive past him when this time, it was Shoko who came out, looking alarmed. "Gojo! She's asking for you!"
"He cannot!"
"Suguru..." Satoru turned to his friend with a look and immediately, the duke went to the man’s side.
The emperor then regarded him with an unsettling smile. "Do you like being the Archbishop?"
"Huh?"
"Would you want to keep your position as the Archbishop?"
"Your Majesty!"
"Do you believe you can keep your position as the Archbishop... by defying me?"
Yaga fell silent, as if he had just swallowed a sour lemon, and Satoru seized the opportunity to push him aside. "Then move."
Even after Satoru had rushed inside, Suguru remained near the archbishop and Yaga looked at him incredulously. "He went inside already, why are you still here?"
"His Majesty's orders. Have to keep an eye for you for evaluation since he has another candidate in mind should he deem you unfit in your role..."
"Who is the other candidate!?"
"Ah, he told me his name was... Priest Akutami?"
. . .
Pain blinded your senses that you fell back to the sheets after strenuously pushing, and the next thing you knew, Satoru's face was in your sight.
"Sweetheart, hey..." he took hold of your hand and planted a firm kiss on it. His cerulean eyes gleamed brightly as he gazed at you. "I'm here now."
"Satoru—" your voice came out as a whisper, before another contraction seized you and you moaned. Your eyes rolled back involuntarily as the intense pain surged through you once more. You could feel how close you were, yet it was so painful you could barely breathe.
"Take deep breath, here—" he helped you to sit straighter and gave you his arm to hold.
"Your Majesty, I can see the head already!" the midwife exclaimed in joy, and Satoru turned to you with a smile.
“A little bit more,” he encouraged you, pressing a kiss on your temple. “Just a bit more, my sweet, you can do it, hmm? Here, hold onto me.”
And with his voice as your lifeline, you groaned and pushed once more, putting a part of your soul into it before you blacked out and collapsed in his arms.
At first, everything was silent, but then a sound reached your ears— a cry. Your baby's first cry.
"I-it's a princess!" the midwife announced, and the room erupted into gasps of wonder.
You looked at Satoru through bleary eyes, and for the first time, you saw him utterly speechless.
He was struck by the sight of that tiny being being gently cleaned by Shoko before his gaze returned to you.
You were sweaty, panting, limp, appearing haggard with tears in your eyes and streaking your face, and yet...
You are still the most beautiful thing he has ever laid his eyes on.
"A girl... just... like you wanted..." you managed to say with a hoarse voice and wobbly smile, and seeing you, without a moment's hesitation, Satoru went in and locked you in a deep kiss.
"Thank you—" even he himself was near tears when he pulled away and pressed his forehead against yours. There were so many things he wanted to tell you, countless celebrations he envisioned, all in praise of you and the heavens above for granting him such unparalleled happiness—
"...!" But suddenly, you curled into him, suppressing a scream and failing that it turned into a devastating wail, and you dug your nails into the flesh of his arm. "Ahhh!"
"What happened?" Satoru looked at you in alarm, then to the midwife who hurried to tend to you once more. "What happened to the Empress?!"
The midwife probed your belly, her expression lighting up with understanding. "O-oh my... there is another baby, Your Majesty!"
He didn't have time to dwell on the revelation when you cried out again. Setting aside all surprise, he aided you once more, and after more minutes of intense effort—
"A prince! The Empress has given birth to a prince!"
Twins. The whole Western Empire rejoiced at the news that their new empress had delivered a prince and princess for the nation.
Amidst the flurry of upcoming festivities and celebrations, you spent most of your days resting, as the birth had taken a lot out of you. Satoru took charge of the planning again, despite his busy schedule, and of course, he never failed to visit you and the babies regularly.
And whenever he did, his breath was always taken away.
Two precious babies lay still in the bassinet, peacefully asleep. Satoru gently poked each of them on the cheek.
The princess... as if the heavens had answered his prayers, she resembled you so closely that he fell in love all over again. She was so precious and small, and he imagined she would grow into a beauty just like you.
Satoru had sworn it before and did so again—he would protect her at all costs.
And the prince... he was so much like Satoru that it made his heart skip a beat. With his hair and eyes, his one concern was whether he had inherited his curse too. But regardless, he was determined to help and guide him should that day ever come.
When the boy cooed in his sleep, Satoru knew he too owned a part of his heart. He would definitely raise him well, teach him how to protect you and his sister, and one day, to succeed him as well.
As of you... you were asleep much like your children, and Satoru failed to hold back a smile. He gently combed your hair and just like that, you were roused from your sleep.
"Satoru, hello," you croaked and leaned into his touch.
His eyes fondly crinkled as he looked at you. "How are you feeling?"
"Good. It's been weeks. I've been feeling better for a while actually." You threw him a meaningful smile. "I might've cheated my way out of royal duties to rest..."
"Heh. Then keep cheating until the allotted time then. I'll permit it."
You raised an eyebrow. "When will my time be up?"
"The ceremony to present our babies..." Satoru played with your fingers. "We're expected to hold them and show them to the masses. You have to be there so they won't forget who the empress is."
"Right..." but you suddenly deflated and your husband tilted his head. "After that... we can't keep them out of the prying eyes anymore, everyone would delve into their affairs too."
Satoru's eyes fixed on you, sincere and true. "We can't avoid it, but if you wish for them to be out of the limelight for a little more time, I can arrange it. Your wishes come first."
The thought that your precious babies would be faced with many court intrigues made you want to keep them inside the protection of your womb a little longer. Yet, just as you and Satoru had experienced yourselves, sitting at the highest seat of monarchy required unbending will. Both of you would have to teach that strength to your children.
As if knowing what you were thinking, Satoru gathered both of your hands and squeezed it with a smile.
“Still, we are going to be there for them, are we not? Don’t worry. I’m here, and there’s no way I’m letting our son face any sort of curse alone.” He caressed your knuckles. “And you will be here for our daughter, teaching her how to become a magnificent lady just like you. As long as we’re here... they’ll be okay, hmm?”
Right at that moment, as you stared back at his deep, sparkling eyes, you could've sworn that you had fallen in love with Gojo Satoru once again.
You used to think that to love is to be accepted wholly, but after everything you had experienced, you realized that it also came with a load of worries, and you used to fear them, until...
A smile so pretty bloomed in your face as you squeezed his hand back.
“I love you,” you held his gaze unwaveringly, your eyes shining like glitters. “So long as we’re together, there’s nothing we can’t do, yeah?”
He seemed taken aback at first, before breaking into a smile so dashing it was almost blinding.
“Chasing after you and making you my empress is possibly the greatest deed I’ve achieved my entire life,” Satoru declared with a grin, and you knew your heart was truly his in every sense then.
“So, right. From now on and forevermore— You and me. Always.”
. . .
The presentation of the new crown prince and princess of Western Empire was an unforgettable affair. The grandeur of the celebration rivaled even the festivities of your wedding itself.
Given that it was both a ceremony for the babies and also nearing your birthday, Satoru decided to host a grand ball to mark the occasion. This lavish event ensured no one would dispute your position, regardless of how you came to hold it, and it was also befitting the bestowal of official titles upon your children.
Your son and daughter squirmed in their crib as they were brought forward, and once again, as you stood before the assembled court, you felt a twinge of reluctance to finally present them to everyone.
But Satoru's eyes held you with so much certainty that you found reassurance in his gaze.
And by the moment he cradled your son and you held your daughter, and he declared to the court—
"Here I present to you, the Crown Prince and Crown Princess of Western Empire!"
You feel wholly sure. With Satoru by your side, you let go of all your fears. Time and time again, he had proved the extent of his love for you, and as you ushered a new era with him, you believed all was going to be well.
Just like your coronation not long ago, the crowd cheered in joy.
Gazing upon the sea of people roaring and cheering below… a familiar warmth surged within you.
Once again, it was a sight beyond belief for you, as they chanted praises and acclamations—
“LONG LIVE THE CROWN PRINCE!”
“ALL HAIL THE EMPEROR!”
“LONG LIVE THE EMPIRE!”
SOME WEEKS LATER . . .
"We've received a very strange invitation..."
You looked up from your baby boy and curiously peeked at one of Satoru's aides who was on duty today, Todo Aoi. He had come bearing news.
You had always thought he was quite eccentric, but today, he looked uncharacteristically serious.
"Strange, how?" Suguru questioned.
"From?" Satoru added with a totally uninterested expression.
"Eastern Empire," the man coughed awkwardly, as if thinking hard. "Apparently, a prince has been born and the royal consort is to be crowned as the new empress..."
"Who!?" Shoko, who was holding your baby girl, whirled around in surprise.
"Royal Consort Hanabi, I believe her name is. She is to be the Empress of Eastern Empire."
It was such a deafening silence all of a sudden that you could hear a pin drop. Suguru and Shoko gaped. You were stunned.
Only Satoru who didn't seem to show any reaction to the news.
Suguru cleared his throat, feeling the need to double-take. "Empress of... where?"
"That conniving hag..." Shoko muttered under her breath, before her gaze accidentally landed on you.
You were surprised, but strangely, you didn't feel anything. Long ago, you would've been heartbroken by this turn of events, but now, it just eluded you how she could maintain her position as long as she could. Well, when one is favored by luck, anything is possible though...
Satoru suddenly clapped his hands, letting out a mocking laugh.
"Is it really that surprising?" he asked with so much sarcasm, catching all four of you off guard. "When the emperor can barely fulfill his duties, even a scullery maid could rise to become the mother of the nation. The real question is..."
It was as if a sudden chill descended upon the room when he next spoke:
"How long... will she last?"
The question is answered soon enough.
Empress Hanabi's reign in the Eastern Empire lasted for only seven days. It was known as the greatest scandal ever gracing the history.
She had given birth to a son, who was appointed as the crown prince on the same day as her coronation. Emperor Zen'in Naoya personally led the ceremony. At first glance, it really seemed well...
Until seven days later, he suddenly erupted in fury.
The palace walls have ears, and behind closed doors, servants whispered about the incident. It began with Naoya launching into a tirade, claiming that the princess born to Hanabi previously, as well as the newborn prince, were not his by blood.
It was of the highest form of treachery to deceive the crown, and so a death sentence was about to be imposed on Hanabi for this… until the emperor suddenly fell ill due to a stroke, rendering him unfit to rule. Prince Megumi ascended the throne as the new emperor.
Despite his stern demeanor, the young emperor showed abundant kindness. He considered the plight of Hanabi's children, realizing they would be in peril without their mother, so he chose to banish her instead.
. . .
How did it end up like this?
Hanabi didn't know how many days and nights she had cried, cursing fate and her life, as she was being sent away from the palace.
Everything was in her grasp. Her very grasp! Until... until—!
She sobbed her heart out once again, mourning her short-lived life, before it was cruelly robbed from her.
Her children... they were all of Naoya's blood. Despite doubts surrounding them, she was faithful to him and to the crown. All of this... was all a whole scheme to trap her!
...was it you? Could you have orchestrated this? Could you truly be so wicked as to ruin her life entirely?
"You've always coveted what I have, and sooner or later, that will be your downfall."
Was this the price of defying her social status, just like your omen, after all...?
"That can't be!" she screamed inside the wagon set to bring her to the unknown, her voice drowned by the sound of the rainstorm happening outside. "Empress Y/N... you're a horrible human being!"
With every fiber of her being, she hated you so much for ever crossing your path with hers.
Even until the end, she never realized that it was all her own doing.
After hours of journey on the road, she was brought inside a mansion she failed to recognize due to the storm at the first glance. She had given up on resisting because it was futile.
But upon realizing who awaited her in the room, she trembled in fear and backed against the wall.
Hanabi wished she could lose her sanity amidst the whirlwind madness happening to her, because really, it might be better than all of this.
His impressive height gazed down at her from above. It was impossible to hide from his piercing stare.
Duke Kamo Choso, with his crooked sneer, greeted her.
"Well, hello, Hanabi... it has been a while, huh? Did you miss me?"
- END -
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#gojo x reader#gojo satoru x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#satoru gojo x reader#gojo satoru#satoru x reader#jjk imagines#gojo smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk smut#gojo satoru fluff#jjk angst#jjk fluff#gojo x you#satoru gojo fluff#jjk x reader smut#gojo satoru x reader smut#jjk x reader fluff#gojo fluff#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jjk fic#jjk fanfic#jujutsu kaisen imagines#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujutsu kaisen fanfic#gojo satoru imagines#jjk gojo satoru#jutusu kaisen x reader#satoru gojo x you
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i am so so gently asking abled storytellers to try this little exercise: consider that maybe the main character doesn't miraculously get through traumatic event number 8277 with minor injuries. maybe they don't make a full, narratively-convenient recovery. there are tangible, long-term effects on their health. they are disabled. there are lots of ways to be disabled, and you can pick whatever makes the most sense. the point is that because they're the main character, they have to stay at the heart of the narrative. what happens to your story after that? just for the sake of this exercise, you're not allowed to have them spiral into helpless depression, or collapse under self-loathing, or turn their story into a quest for a cure or an uplifting recovery narrative. think it through instead. how can you tell this story with the character's disability? what needs to change? are there any reasons why these changes can't happen?
at the end of it, you might change nothing. but I think this is worth doing, because sometimes you'll find that the reason you didn't want your character to have a limp, or lose a limb or sense, or have some kind of SFF-appropriate fantasy disability is because of internalised biases. those are worth challenging & i truly believe that creators miss out on richer stories when they view disability either as a fate worse than death or as nothing more than a catalyst for tragedy.
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Help Moamen Rebuild His Life: Orphaned and Amputated Due to the War in Gaza
Moamen, an 6-year-old boy, had his life changed forever during the devastating war in Gaza. While playing near his home, an airstrike destroyed his house, taking his father’s life and leaving Moamen severely injured. He lost his right leg and, along with it, a part of his childhood.

Today, Moamen is an orphan, just like his five siblings. Their father, who was their pillar of strength, is no longer with them, and their mother is doing her best to hold on to hope despite this immense tragedy. But the challenges they face are overwhelming.
An Urgent Need for Medical Treatment and a Prosthetic Leg
Moamen requires daily medical care that costs approximately $200 per day. This treatment is crucial to prevent infections, ease his pain, and prepare his body to receive a prosthetic leg. For him, this prosthesis is not just a medical necessity; it represents the hope of walking again and regaining some sense of normalcy in his life.

A Call for International Solidarity
We have reached out to several international organizations for assistance, but so far, no concrete help has arrived. That’s why we are turning to you—your generosity and humanity—to help us transform Moamen’s life and that of his family.

Why Your Support Is Vital
The $200 needed daily for Moamen’s medical care is far beyond his family’s means. With your donations:
• You will contribute to the vital treatments he needs.
• You will help fund a prosthetic leg to restore his mobility.
• You will give Moamen and his siblings the chance to build a better future despite the hardships they face.

A Small Act of Kindness Can Make a Big Difference
Every contribution, no matter how small, can have a tremendous impact on Moamen’s life. Together, we can restore hope and show that even in the darkest times, compassion and humanity prevail.
Help us give Moamen a second chance.
Donate today and share this campaign with your friends, family, and networks.
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#gaza genocide#gaza strip#free gaza#gazaunderattack#gaza#save gaza#gaza gofundme#gaza fundraiser#helth care#helthylife#help gaza#gaza gfm#free palestine#save palestine
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she literally didint abandon them. play the game its heavily implied she stayed and waited and only left when her people BETRAYED her! when asgore didint take back his declaration of war she saw how bloodthirsty her people were when one of her children was human. she never abandoned them they clearly wouldn't have listened to her and she LEFT TO SAVE THE HUMANS THAT WOULD FALL! HER LEAVING WAS PRAGMATIC COMPARED TO ASGORE BEING A COWARD!
she left to DO something about it while asgore cowardly waited hoping another human would never fall because he let his anger get the best of him and then continued to be a coward and lead his people on by not leaving when he killed the first human.
I love asgore hes so very complex and interesting but toriel literally didint do anything wrong and did not NEED any comeuppance especially in pacifist since shes RIGHT! her ideals conflict multiple times in the story in the neutral endings and her arc is about breaking the cycle of grief to fight asgore instead of just trying to protect the humans from him! Her ideals are punished in the neutral endings where she gets exiled again by queen undyne but shes meant to be right in the pacifist ending since her hope that humans and monsters can get along is proven true.
if you really think she needs 'comeuppance' i reallyyy want to know your opinions on asgore and sans cause i only ever see this weird take from sexist fans who dont understand her and are exclusivly sans fans or think asgore did nothing wrong.
Transcript: Sometimes, I wish we had a scene in classic Undertale where Torial gets her comeuppance for abandoning Monsterkind… I wish Undyne or somebody went off at her about it. It just seems unjust for her to get away scot-free… You are free to disagree.
#her people betrayed her and she was the only one of them to view revenge as a bad thing that would lead to more bloodshed#she was level headed enough to understand if asgore declared war then monster kind would be wiped out for good she was thinking more clearl#than he was and didint make any hasty grief fueled decisions she couldn't take back like he did. she was grieving just as much as him#and she handled it better but she understandably LEFT when it became obvious her people who KNEW chara & asriel were willing to let their#memory be tarnished! yes she made mistakes but they are directly addressed in canon and shes clearly meant to be in the right compared to#asgore! she didint get off scott free either! six of her children died by asgores hand and she spent a millenium punishing herself and neve#moving on from her grief! asgore had MULTIPLE support networks and times to pull back his decleration of war he didint need to kill six kid#but until she met sans toriel was by herself and needed to watch 2 of her children die#her people turn against her along with her husband#and then she had to (BY HERSELF) try and protect 7 children from him knowing her HUSBAND killed them in her dead childrens name#its never even stated that she fought all of the 6 humans before frisk some of them may have snuck out and she may have even been seperated#from them or been tricked by them. her fighting frisk is clearly the first time shes fought one of them#and its treated as the tragedy it is not her just beating them up for no reason she just doesnt want asgore to kill them!#okay rant over i hate this stupid idea that shes at fault or needed a reality check when shes meant to be the one giving one
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Recently I’ve been thinking about the different types of love languages in Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint, The S-Classes That I Raised, and Lout of the Count’s Family…
Not to say that each of the stories describes only one single kind of love language; they are, after all, all novels that focus on Found Family, with many different types of relationships between characters that express their love for each other in as many different ways.
Yet, I’ve noticed how at the core of each of these three stories there is one specific act of love that recurs more than others, and that becomes the true Theme each novel revolves around.
In Lout of the Count’s Family, the main love language is providing food and a home.
“Home” is such an important concept in LCF that Cale collects houses like they were pokemon cards. The source of his trauma when he was a child as Kim Roksu was that he was not given sufficient food, and that where he lived was not truly a shelter where he could feel safe, just a place he was trapped in.
And I don’t think there are ever more than 2 chapters in a row without a character offering food to others, or asking if they’re hungry, if they’ve eaten, why haven’t you eaten, here have some apple pie!!
Cale uses his newfound money and power to make sure his loved ones are provided for. That’s how he adopts bonds with most of his new family.
The first thing Raon does after he’s freed from the prison he’s been trapped in all his life, is to leave food for this hopelessly weak human.
Choi Han, who has lived alone in a dangerous forest for decades, would do anything to protect his home.
The Crown Prince, who has been isolated and untrusting of everyone ever since his mother died, makes sure to always have cookies in his bedroom in case guests “break in” for a visit at any time of the day or the night.
I love you, you’ll never be hungry again. I love you, my home is your home.
In The S-Classes That I Raised, the main love language is words.
Yoojin’s powers are literally activated by telling people “I love you”. Because all he ever wanted was to say “I love you” to his brother one last time.
Because the tragedy that starts the story happens because Yoohyun loved and protected his hyung in secret for years. Silence creates misunderstandings, it creates distance, it leads to loss.
Loving someone isn’t enough, tell them! Reassure them. Remember what they say, because their words are important!!
Ever since the regression, Yoojin always let people know when he loves them and appreciates them. “You’re perfect, you’re cute, you’re so talented, you’re so handsome, you are loved.”
And as the novel progresses, whenever Yoojin is in pain, or doesn’t know what to do, he turns to Sung Hyunje because he needs to be reassured, he needs to know he did well, he needs to hear he is still important to the people he loves.
I love you, please know that I love you! I love you, please tell me you love me back.
And finally, in Omniscient Reader’s Viewpoint, the main love language is time.
Time is one of the greatest sources of horrors in ORV. Eternities upon eternities of suffering, being trapped for ages in the same, hopeless loop, wishing for everything to just stop.
And yet, time is also the greatest gift characters give to each other.
Because the wounds Dokja suffered as a child, and then again and again through his whole life…. They need time to heal. They need so much time. They will probably take forever.
So let them take forever.
Despite how much pain and worry he causes his companions by giving up on himself over and over again, his companions never give up on him. And he doesn’t understand why!! He doesn’t think he’s worth it. But it’s not his choice, it’s theirs. And they will go through as many tries, as much pain, as much time as it takes, before they can finally save him.
I love you, so I will wait fifty years for you. I love you, so I will live through thousands of lifetimes to find you. I love you, so I will read and reread your story for the rest of time, just to keep you alive.
#been feeling some feelings#love languages#omniscient reader's viewpoint#the s classes that i raised#lout of the count’s family#orv#sctir#tsctir#lcf#tcf#trash of the count's family#cale henituse#kim roksu#han yoojin#kim dokja
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hii, i love how your brain works so muuuch! this is my first time requesting something, but could you maybe write a story where reader is pretty intelligent and in a relationship with hotch, and they both get invited to dinner at readers house, but her whole family is also really smart and a bit condescending to reader (maybe because she's the youngest sibling or something?) and she feels inadequate but hotch notices and reassures her/defends her? if you can't or you want to take the story in a different way it's totally okay, i would love to read whatever you write!
Sum of Their Expectations - A.H
hotch had thought meeting your family was just another formality, an inevitable step in your relationship. but after an evening with them he realizes two things — they will never deserve you, and you will never have to face them alone again.
pairings: aaron hotchner x fem!reader warnings: toxic family dynamics, self-worth issues, verbal and emotional manipulation, hurt/comfort, happy ending! a little hint to their being an age gap but wc: 1.5k
You were always the sun in any room. Aaron had learned that early, long before he ever kissed you, before he let himself admit how much he wanted to. You were warmth and sharp wit, laughter wrapped in resilience. A person who could mold tragedy in your hands and soften its jagged edges, who could make a stranger feel like they belonged. You are brilliant, too, effortlessly so, in a way that never felt like arrogance. And yet, at this table, surrounded by the people who should know you best, you are quiet.
You look small. He had never seen you try to take up less space before, had never seen your hands tremble when you reach for a glass of wine.
And he had never, never felt the kind of anger he was feeling now. This anger was different. It was personal.
This was anger with nowhere to go but toward the people sitting across from him, completely unaware he was already deciding exactly how he was going to make them regret underestimating you.
“She’s always been a bit of a dreamer,” your mother says, swirling her wine in slow circles. “Never really settled on what she wanted to do. But I suppose some people just take longer to figure things out.”
Aaron’s grip on his fork tightens, the pressure building until he swears he can fill the silver bend. He wonders if they even listen to themselves. If they realize how easily they strip you down, whittle you down to something unfinished. As if you are lost. As if you have not created a space for yourself in a world that demands proof of existence, proof of value, at every goddamn turn.
You laugh, but it’s not real. It’s that too-bright, too-sharp laugh that he’s heard you use only when you’re uncomfortable, when you don’t want to cause a scene. And he sees it — your fingers, the way they pick at the edge of your napkin, twisting and twisting until the fabric begins to fray. You also do that sometimes, when you’re nervous, but it’s frantic now.
He covers your hand with his own. His grip steady and grounding. The way he hopes to be for you. And when your eyes finally lift to his, something splinters inside him.
You look ashamed.
Ashamed. Like you are the one who has done something wrong. Like their careless words, their thoughtless cruelty, are yours to answer for.
The creeping anger that has been simmering in his veins sharpens into something lethal.
Because you had told him you didn’t want to come.
Not in words, not directly. But you had given him plenty else — the slight pause before answering, the too-quick way you brushed off the suggestion, the way you changed the subject as if the thought of it left a bad taste in your mouth.
He had thought — foolishly, selfishly — that it was nothing more than the usual reluctance that came with family. That maybe it was the age difference, or his job, or the natural intimidation that came with being in a relationship with someone like him. And he had assured you that all families had their dysfunction, that he wanted to meet yours, wanted to understand the people who had shaped you.
He had even dared to picture them as the ones he would ask for their blessing one day, imagined the moment when he would look them in the eyes and promise them that no one — no one — would ever love you like he did.
Now, all he can think is that he should have listened. That your reluctance wasn’t just shyness or discomfort — it had been foresight. And he had ignored it.
“And then, of course, she’s always been a bit… sensitive,” your mother muses again, dabbing her napkin at the corner of her mouth, eyes flicking toward you. “Not always the easiest to reason with, you know. I imagine that must be frustrating for you, Aaron, given your line of work.”
“She’s not difficult to reason with,” he says, gaze like steel. “She just doesn’t cater to people who mistake condescension for conversation. I imagine that must be frustrating for you.”
Your father barely begins to form a word before Aaron moves.
It’s not rushed. There’s no aggression in the way he stands, no dramatic scrape of his chair against the hardwood, no flash of temper. The cloth from his lap is placed neatly onto the table, then, without a word, he reaches for your jacket, draping it over your shoulders.
“Thank you for your hospitality,” he says. “It’s a shame the company didn’t live up to it.”
His tone is mild, almost polite — but there’s an unmistakable edge beneath it, a sharpness so cleanly delivered it might almost take them a moment to realize they’ve been cut.
You move too quickly, nearly knocking your chair in your rush to follow him. Your hands are unsteady as you smooth down your jacket, blinking rapidly, breath uneven. You’re embarrassed. Still trying to hold it together. Still trying to make it easier for them.
He waits just a second, just long enough to see if anyone at this table will reach for you, will say something that resembles an apology, will make any effort at all to fix what they’ve done.
No one does.
He exhales slowly, his patience burned to embers.
“It’s a remarkable thing,” he muses. “To sit across from people allegedly so intelligent and see just how little they understand.”
He doesn’t stay long enough to watch the words land. He’s already turning away, already steering you toward the door, already making sure you never have to sit at this table again.
The air outside is still, cold enough that your breath fogs in front of you, but you don’t react to it. You just stand there, shoulders drawn up, arms wrapped around yourself, staring down at the pavement.
You swallow hard, glance up at him, then back down again.
“I’m sorry.” It’s a whisper, small and broken, and when you glance at him again, your expression makes his stomach plummet. “I didn’t mean to drag you into all that.”
Aaron doesn’t respond right away. He can’t.
Because this isn’t you.
The person he loves is all light. You’re the one who insists on adding extra sugar to his coffee because he works too hard to drink something that bitter. The one who gets excited about little things – new stationery, a good book, the way the leaves change in the fall. The one who somehow makes him smile more than he ever thought possible.
He wants to turn back, wants to go inside and say something that will make them feel even a fraction of what they made you feel.
But you need him more than his rage does.
“Hey.” He waits until your eyes meet his. “You don’t owe me an apology. You don’t owe them anything either.”
Your breath is uneven. “I just —”
Aaron nearly speaks, his throat tightens with the effort of holding himself back. Because he already knows what you’re about to say. He knows you’ll try to justify their words, to explain away the way they made you feel.
He wants to stop you before you do it, to tell you that you don’t have to make it more bearable for them.
But then he remembers how many times they spoke over you tonight. How many times they disregarded your words, your voice, your feelings.
He won’t be another person who does that. So he presses his lips together, forces himself to wait, and listens.
“I just didn’t want you to see that.” Your fingers twist at the hem of your sleeve. “I didn’t want you to see them like that.”
Aaron moves before you can pull away, hands gliding down your sides as he gathers you against him, pressing you into his chest. His lips find your forehead, lingering there as he inhales deeply.
“Sweetheart,” he murmurs. “There is nothing about you I would ever want to unsee.”
You sag into him, fingering the lapels of his jacket, pulling him closer.
“This isn’t about you,” he says simply. “It never has been.”
You tense slightly against him, and he softens his tone.
“Your parents — people like them — they don’t see you as an individual. They see you as a reflection of themselves, an extension of their own achievements, their own expectations. And when you don’t fit into that mold, they don’t adjust their perception — they try to change you instead.”
His hands slide back up, cradling your face. “That’s their flaw. Not yours.”
A shaky breath escapes you, and you offer a weak, tired smile. “I wish they could see me the way you do.”
“They should.” Aaron’s grip tightens, not harsh, just sure. “But their failure to do so doesn’t make you any less incredible.”
You take a deep breath, straightening your shoulders. “You know, you keep complimenting me like this, and I’m going to start thinking you have a thing for me.”
He laughs at that.
“If you’re done questioning my affections,” he murmurs, shaking his head, “I’d like to take my very incredible girlfriend home now.”
And when you huff a small laugh, squeezing your fingers around his lapels once more, he thinks — yeah. That’s better.
💌 masterlist taglist has been disbanned! if you want to get updates about my writings follow and turn notifications on for my account strictly for reblogging my works! @mariasreblogs
#aaron hotchner x reader#aaron hotchner x fem!reader#aaron hotchner x fem reader#aaron hotchner hurt/comfort#aaron hotchner angst#aaron hotchner x you#aaron hotchner one shot#aaron hotchner oneshot
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please please please i need you to write something for my man Aegon I love how you write for him😭
➳♡before fire takes it all
Aegon II Targaryen x fem!reader
-summary:normally Aegon would ignore Helaena and her strange behavior but,since his wife Y/n got pregnant,he can’t help but think about the words his sister said the moment he announced the news.
-warnings:set in season 1,pre blood and cheese and luke death,teen pregnancy(both Aegon and reader are sixteen),talk about child death,Aegon being paranoid and keeping secrets,Helaena predictions,classic asoiaf warnings,reader can be of whatever house you want.
-thank you so much for the request and let me know what you guys think,send you all my love🩷
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
It hurts.
Love,Aegon thinks.
Love hurts.
His heart bursts,his heart explodes,his heart climbs down his throat and assaults his temples, squeezing and compressing them until his eyes darken,until it scars the tormented irises and pupils.
Loving too much is fatal.Or not?
Isn't that so?
Live well,live badly.Does he lives at all?
“I don't know”,his conscience responds.
Aegon would like to know,but he doesn’t know.He doesn’t even think he knows what the right way to live is anymore,he’s terrified that he doesn’t know what it means to live anymore.
How can he live?How?
How can he pretend that everything is alright?That everything,in the future,is going to be alright?
Normally Aegon wouldn’t think about these sort of things,he used to live day by day dictated by his own selfish desires.But since he had got married two years ago,something in him changed completely.He started to understand what it meant to love and live for someone else,to wake up every morning early to just watch her sleep so soundly next to him,to stay sober at every hour so that he could remember her kind words,her sweet face and calm voice.Wanting to be a different version,a better one,of himself only because she showed him that he deserved happiness and love like everyone else and in return he only wanted to give her the best he could.
But golden necklaces,earrings,beautiful flowers and the most expensive dresses could not fill the hole that was slowly opening under their feet,a hidden tragedy ready to swallow them whole and to break their hearts and souls forever.
Aegon wasn’t one to listen to his family,he longed for his mother love and his father attention,he despised his older half sister,made fun of his younger brothers and mostly ignored his other sister.Only this time,something happened,something made him look in Helaena direction for the first time and his ears had caught every single word that she had whispered to herself.
His wife,Lady Y/n,the most beautiful and kind woman,a innocent young girl with a heart too big for her body,was pregnant.It was true,what they said about expecting women,she was glowing like the most precious diamond and her happiness about becoming a mother,the mother of the lover of her life child,couldn’t be contained by her shiny eyes and big smile.
«The Maester said that signs suggest is going to be a boy.»Aegon had announced one day at the breakfast table.
His mother had smiled kindly and Aemond had nodded giving his shoulder a warm squeeze.It was still too early in the pregnancy to understand whether is was going to be boy or a girl,but still Aegon had hoped that the Maester was right.Having a son was a dream that he never dared to imagine or to say out loud until then,the living proof that he was going to be better than his father ever was for him.
Helaena was sitting next to him,quietly playing with a wooden butterfly,all lost in the secret gardens of her mind when she muttered something: «A son for a son.»without even understanding her own words.
As their mother and brother were talking,Aegon turned slightly toward her.Usually he wouldn’t pay attention to his sister and her strange behavior,he was disgusted by all of those insects that she so lovingly brought everywhere like some pet on a leash and he was so relieved when his father had betrothed him to Y/n instead that her.He wouldn’t even lister or look over her if in the past,her silent words of warning weren’t revealed to be the sour truth.Aemond had lost an eye just like she had said.Maybe if back then he had listened to her,he would have helped his brother and nothing would have happened.
«What does it mean?»Aegon had whispered to her confused.
Helaena wasn’t looking at him,her fingers gracefully tracing the toy«They only want the boy,not the girl.»she said as if she didn’t heard him,nodding to herself.
Aegon left the spoon that he was holding,a sensation of nausea was crawling up his stomach,his heart beating faster«The boy?My boy?Who wants him?»he asked.
His sister stayed quiet,every second felt like an agony for him.His mind became of stone and a part of his was laughing for the fact that he was actually really listening to her,to her crazy words and empty head.But still,something,maybe his father instinct that was already part of him,told him that what she was saying was another dark truth.
A boy and a girl,she had said.He was going to have both,twins.He couldn’t even imagine it,praying that they would take after their mother soft and gentle spirit but also his fierce nature.Y/n would have been delighted to know that they were about to have twice of the love,but what would she said if she knew that someone wanted their son?
«The rats.»Helaena answered then,her eyes bore holes in his as she turned to look at her older brother,shiny lilac flowers watered in fear and condolences.
It had been months since that conversation and Aegon couldn’t stop to think about it.Every night,as he watched Y/n sleep next to him while he so gently caressed her belly where two new lives were growing,he could still feel his sister horrified stare on him and her heavy words in his ears.
Y/n is talking to Aegon,while they were lying under the covers of their bed.Her head is on his chest,her hair smelled of flowers and peaches,her voice sleepy and always so tender as his hand was staying on her swollen stomach.She's talking to him about her day and he can't listen to her,he can't even see her behind his pale eyelashes that lower,behind his tired eyelids that are threatening to close tightly.
With the fingers of his free hand he massage them,the nail of his index finger finds a tear that was hidden there,at the corner of the right eye,and uprooting it,let it be dried out by air.
Aegon was exhausted.He had difficulty to sleep when every sound made him jump,every shadow in the corner gave him a heart attack.
He would like to stop thinking,he would like to find a way to turn off his mind,to blow up the candle that kept his brain from sleeping and this crazy thought makes him understand that he had become even more incredibly pathetic than he already was.
Aegon was terrorized.If he already ignored Helaena,now he was avoiding her like the plague in fear that she could say something else,or worse,talk about her thoughts to Y/n.
Y/n,his beautiful and sweet wife,already had so much to think about.Being eight months pregnant was taking a toll on her,even though she never stopped smiling,he could see that she was tired and that her body couldn’t bare it anymore.He couldn’t let her worry about something that his weird sister said to him,not when the Maester said that she needed peace,calmness and affection.And even if he hadn’t said that,how could Aegon tell her what was keeping him awake at night?
He set more and more knights to follow his wife around to make sure that nothing happened to her and his children,the Maester came to check on her at least once a day and when he wasn’t with her,his mother would keep her company in the solarium.He had personally hired people to hunt the rats of the Red Keep.Aegon so often dreamed of being just like the armors that Ser Arryk wears,cold, motionless,empty,that he has come to believe that it would be beautiful,it would be fulfilling,to be something without emotions and rest in a corner without light.
Aegon had still to meet his son,both of his children,after he had dreamed of him,of them,for so long.And yet already someone wanted to take his baby away from him.
The flashes of the veins on his forehead tingle and he clash,he crush himself,against an imaginary expanse of water that slaps his brain,crushes his lungs with long ivory tusks,disfigures his face.
Aegon was blocked.
He was stuck in some claustrophobic scribbled box,in a rusty bubble of his faulty soul,and he was afraid see beyond.But he could see the future,the one that Helaena had tried to warn him about.
He could see beyond and,the certainty is disconcerting,he clearly see that the worst nightmare of any human being,what wakes up men in the middle of the night and scares children with simple shadows,is the awareness of being chased:no one can ever escape from themselves,no one has ever escaped from destiny.
Not even him,especially him.
Because Aegon knew already,tasting it on the tip of his tongue,that what will happen is was going to be his fault.Certainly not because of Y/n.
«Am I boring you?»Y/n voice was tired but still sweet«Forgive me,my days are monotonous,predictable and highly boring.»she huffed,caressing his hand above her stomach.
Ever since she had started showing,her husband treated her like the finest and most delicate porcelain.All she could do during the day was read in their chambers,walk through the gardens and pray with the Queen.Not exactly a vivacious life,especially since Ser Arryk followed her every move.
She yawns,she apologizes,and Aegon finally slam the lumpy eyelashes and look at her.
Y/n is smiling,innocent,carrying his children and then his body moves by itself,he act instinctively, and get her closer to him.
A hand behind her nape,a strong and fast grip, almost stuttered,and Aegon feel her words on the palate,he eat them between his lips moving on her open mouth.He kiss her badly,and he hurt himself,he will hurt both of them,he kiss her following the dull rhythm of his ears,he kiss her and he pass the noise of his thoughts to her.
Aegon feels a hole in the center of his throat,a knot of cries,and this makes him sway and covers his eyes with torn red lightning here and there,it breaks his mind.Yet he keep kissing her.He have to kiss her.
Kissing Y/n scratches his soul,kissing her stirs up his fears and reminds him,in the pause of one of her breath,the so natural way in which pleasure and pain mix,get tangled,whenever pieces of skin graze and play with the tongues and crests of a fire.Fingertips caressing purple flames,white sheets reduced to blackened shreds,a plate of ice lying on the jigular.
Kissing Y/n now is like taking a sip of salt.Filling her mouth,having her under his palms,feeling the boiling heat of her cheeks against his nose and against his upper lip.
Y/n forces Aegon to give her every good part of himself,even those he thought were lost by now,and she does it with twisting tongues or with an annoying clash of teeth.All it takes is a simple touch and he’s willing to give her the world.She makes him wanting to be a better person and he so scared to fail her,that he wouldn’t be able to protect her and the most precious things that they created together.
«Aegon.»she whispered on his lips,eyes fluttered closed.
«I love you.»he said without thinking«I love you and our children.And I didn't think I could ever love,not this way.»he confessed,his voice trembling as his mouth was on hers again.
«I love you too.Are you alright sweetheart?»Y/n asked placing a hand on his warm cheek,she could read him like a open book but sometimes even her couldn’t understand him completely.
Aegon wished he could tell her all about what was going on in his mind.To share with her his deepest fears,to let her hold him and tell him that everything is going to be alright and that they will be safe and together for all of their lives.
But when she starts kissing him in a different way,like a helpless girl who would let herself do anything from him,when she starts kissing him with a teenage heat,a heat so in love and so lost, then he would like to do something else.
He would like to yell all the terrible words that Helaena told him,he would like to tug on her and burst her stupid and crazy soap bubbles in front of her eyes and he would like to do it just to remind her who he really was.To remind his sweet Y/n that so willingly loved,accepted and cherished him,that believed that with him nothing could touch her,that he was still a dragon and dragons are known to burn people.
Aegon doesn’t answer her,he just lets his forehead on hers with his eyes closed.
«You don’t have to worry.»Y/n murmured against his skin«You are not like your father and our children already know that,they love you just like I do.»she promised him,their hands interlaced on her belly.
He had voiced his concerns about fatherhood the moment she told him that she was with child,his child.Children now.And she had spent countless nights reassuring him that he was going to be a good father,a better one,unlike his.That he was going to be there for them,but now he knows that he can’t escape his own fate.His father shadow will forever be there to remind him that they are just the same:bound to fail their families.
“Stop it,please.Stop holding my heart so tight in your hands,that's enough.”Aegon thought.
It was in moments like these that Aegon remembered that Y/n was just a girl,a frightened sixteen years old who lives every second with her chest open,her heart too visible to anyone,too exposed.The feelings,the emotions,painted between her bright eyes and lips,make her an easy target,a sacrificial lamb,a too good person who can easily be stabbed in the back.
Her goodness and naivety makes her vulnerable and Aegon knows it,Gods,he knows it.
Because Y/n is not,in the slightest,capable of defending herself,she is not even able to understand the reality of the universe,she does not come to terms with the subtle and treacherous truths.She does not accept the existence of evil in the world,she does not accept the possibility that often what is considered good and right,is not really good,is not really right.
So how could Aegon get her away from the black that drips from his nails,scars,thoughts?Y/n thinks she knows how dark his soul is,she thinks she's got it,but he know she doesn’t.
It will never be like this.
«Aegon.»she calls for him again as soon as she realizes that his mind is wandering too far.
Y/n throws his name on his skin and he swallow the panic that warms his esophagus,which runs through his every rib,as he block her head in his hands,almost in a trap.
Aegon push her to lie on the mattress,make her collapse between the pillows almost as if he had beaten her in a duel,and he hovers on top of her relaxed body,carefully holding her stomach.
Y/n doesn't tremble.
He’s are literally assaulting her and she lets him do it,she agrees,she welcomes him between her legs,in her heart,in her mouth that moves a little away from his and then falls on his eyelids that are still closed.
Aegon wish he could tear his eyes out,blind himself with huge metal spikes.He doesn’t let anyone get so close to him,he’d never done it and now more than before he wished didn’t do it.Because now they would see it,they already saw it.It was evident,under the lights and everyone eyes that his legacy was about to be born and die all in once.
Even the rats will see it.If someone dared to direct their steps towards Aegon,if someone dared even raise their head towards him,they would see his pupils and find Y/n and their children in there.
At the center of all his thoughts,of all his hopes:the end of an entire life that has bent over itself in the hope of scraping together some more time and living it with them.
So what's wrong?What binds his eyelashes in a white spider web?Could Helaena be right or he was being paranoid again?She was right about the fact that Y/n was carrying twins,the Maester had confirmed it months ago,but could she be right about the rest?
Then he felt it,against his warm palm and his heart skip a beat.A little kick,yet strong and determined to be felt.
«Looks like someone woke up.»Y/n giggled,looking down at her body.
«I didn’t mean to wake them.I’m sorry.»is all that Aegon can whisper and he doesn’t even know what he’s really apologizing for.
Y/n listens to him and suddenly recognizes something in the tone of his voice.She relaxes her limbs under him even more,completely wipes away any trace of tension as if someone had just cut the thin threads that moved her body,and she sulks as she touches his lilac eyes that he still deny her,stubbornly.
«Why are you so sad?What happened?»she said,concern covering all her beautiful face.
It’s not what happened,but what could happen.
Aegon forced a smile on his lips«A bad dream.That's all.»he lies,shaking his head.
Thats what he prayed every night,that it was all a nightmare and that he would wake up soon.
Y/n rubs her fingertips on his eyelashes and he feel her lips lying against his cheekbone.She’s smiling.
«Don't worry.I just found the last sleep crumbs that were hiding from you and threw them away. They were the ones who held back the bad dream and now they are gone.»she explained to him,peppering sweet kisses on his face.
Aegon eyelids rise on their own and he clash with the flickering image of his wife looking at him and bringing to his face her index finger on which one of his eyelashes is placed,almost a crescent moon caught in the air and hovering towards the earth.
«Do you want to make a wish?My mother always told me to do it,but I have to admit that almost none of my wishes ever came true in this way. Maybe I was asking for impossible things,out of my reach.Same thing with the shooting stars.Do you want to try anyway?»Y/n was rumbling,now he remembered why she was friends with his sister.
Aegon leverage his elbows,without getting too far away from her and look at her strangely«What?»he asked confused.
His cheeks mottled red and it seems to him that the way she bites her lips is yet another punch against his anesthetized emotions.
«Forgive me,it's such a stupid thing.Please forget it.»and while she is saying it she moves her nail in the act of throwing away his wish that has taken on the common form of a pale eyelash.
Y/n gesture makes the eyelash roll down and it swirls over itself and chases the earth,chases its tail,forms several open circles into which he stick his dream,his nightmare,his hidden thought.
The eyelash is lost on the red carpet and Aegon don't see it anymore.
He look for Y/n gaze again as she pushes him back into kissing her.She asks him,clumsily,to let go of those silly words of hers.The words of a girl that was still too young and forced by her father to grow up too fast,a girl hat was still a child herself with all of her fantasies and fairytales.A child that will raise children soon.
Because Y/n was better than Aegon,she is,even if she doesn't know it,and she showed it to him so many times that he has now lost count of the occasions when he felt at fault.Occasions when he realized he don't deserve her.
Aegon prefer to ignore this reality of the facts,he prefer to put his lips on her collarbone and bite slowly,resume and rummaging through her fertile body,one hand in her hair and the other under her nightgown,and grab as much as much as she offers him.
And Y/n offers Aegon everything,always.
«No wish was ever fulfilled?No one?»the question comes out of his teeth before he can control it,it pours out as his mouth moves over her belly that he suddenly feel quiver.
She is laughing.All three of them are,he realizes as he start tracing with his fingers his children imaginary features on the skin of her stomach.
«Maybe two of them.»Y/n says,referring to the lives she created inside of her«But I found out that my wishes only come true when I look at myself in a puddle.»she laughs again with her mouth open and then moves her head into a pillow.
His fingertips tingle on contact with her skin and his stomach closes into a knot the moment he notice how the intimacy that his movements has turned into familiarity.Because that is what they were going to be soon,a family.
«When did you looked at yourself into a puddle?»Aegon suddenly asked,giggling a bit when another kick met his hand.
Y/n hand found its way into his messy silver locks«The day that my father had accompanied me here for our betrothal.»she tells him,a warm feeling in her chest at the memory.
«It was raining.»he said,he remembered perfectly the first time he saw her.
He remembered her father fussing all over her wet hair,trying to adjust her dress and to make her look presentable.But she was still the most beautiful and vulnerable creature that Aegon had aver seen.A little wet bird in a golden cage.
She nodded«Before entering the Keep i took a deep breath and,as I stared at my reflection into a puddle at my feet,I secretly wished that the husband i was going to have would love him as much as I love looking at the star.»she smiled lovingly down at him.
It came true.Aegon felt his heart exploding in his chest,he loved his wife more than anything in the world.It was so easy for him to love her,how could he not?The thought that she had to wish for something like that,for something that for him was like breathing made his eyes flutter with little tears.
Aegon moved an arm and he already knew that he will hold her hand,remaining palm to palm,as he already know that her fingers will chase his,that they will squeeze,gasps.Wrists banging against wrists,veins in contact.
The time of a whole life that slips away.
«I have never made a wish.»he confessed then.
He just took,he just wanted.
Oh Aegon,what a stupid mistake.
He stole the dreams of his future child,he had plundered entire experiences of the past,and yet he could have simply asked.With courtesy,with kindness.With a little humility.
What a stupid mistake.
«You must have had a really bad dream.»Y/n whispers in her voice broken by his caresses,and then leans and puts her forehead against his as he rise to look at her«But it’s never too late,you can still have your wish.»she reassured him.
No he couldn’t and maybe they should stop talking,stop wasting time.They both should just exchange their saliva and shut up.Pant,moan obscenely and stop everything else.Eliminate among them the layers of soul,the remnants of some childish hopes,and join like empty bags.
It would be better this way,Aegon recognize this too,just below the surface,just below the peel of his chest,at least admit with himself that it would be better that way.He should stop discovering her hips with words,with confessions,with Helaena confusing words,with half-truths:it's too risky.
He should just close himself and unite with her only the bodies,discover the consistency of the painless choices and stay there stationary,inside an empty and deep gap in which the arms and legs move frantically without ever finding anything to hold on to.
This was his life once,before her.
Aegon had endless possibilities of oblivion,between the broken lines of the light palms,he had everything a young,spoiled prince could ask for.
The simplicity of superficial human relationships flowed through the buttonholes of his fingers and he continued to be unhappy,stubbornly perpetuated his pursuit of unhappiness,but he didn't know it,and therefore he really wasn't.
Or maybe yes?Maybe a part of him knew that?Is that why his chest is burning now?Because now he was finally happy for the first time and he didn’t wanted it to end?
Because now Aegon has Y/n and he managed to create something pure and innocent and beautiful with her,giving them all of the good qualities he didn’t knew he possessed.
Y/n seems to listen to his every secret and fear,to feel his breathing change and become noisier,deeper.She place a hand on his abdomen, slowly,she traces with her fingertips first his palm and then also his wrist,then also the blue vein,and repeat his name,repeat his name,repeat his name again.
Aegon enchant himself in front of the movement of her mouth and listen to the ticking of her heart that stretches until it pulls a painful fist on his gums.
He’s an adult now,a husband and a father.He should behave as such and leave the butterflies to the kids and remember that him,in his stomach and belly,only have the worms of rotten apples.
This happens to those who never make a wish. Didn't he know that?
«I would kill for our family,even innocent people if this means keep the three of you safe.»Aegon suddenly said,voicing his thoughts out loud«Would you still love me after that?»the question is sour in his mouth.
Y/n opens her eyelids to the sound of his question,frantically slams her eyelashes,those eyelashes,and swallows with difficulty.The cheeks are even redder and the ears are also red,the eyes are shiny.Atoms of soul and innocence:they agglomerated together and formed her,a little girl composed of glass and cobwebs,bubbles and feathers.
The bravest Lady he had ever met.
«Of course I will love you.My heart is your for eternity.»she replies and doesn't hesitate for a moment«And I would do the same for us.»she added with a whisper.
Her love for him is equivalent to a black hole in which he could immerse himself and observe a boundless horizon of stars broken and stuck in an icy ground.
She loves him.
And she knows that Aegon loves her too.But right now he can't even answer her,to tell her that he’s sorry,that he’s scared,that he reciprocate her feelings with the same intensity or that maybe he reciprocate them in an even more desperate way than her,crazier.He wish he could tell her that he wished they had more time,that he wasn’t who he is,that he wished that they were born in a different place and had different lives to share forever.
Y/n face is beautiful,her forehead is smooth,no flickering lines to scar her tranquility,and the skin near her eyes is crumpled from the day they got married and started to live a life together.It's the restrained cries,the sleepless nights,the quarrels,the misunderstandings,the voracious kisses left on them like square pieces.
Y/n looks at him,her eyes are still shiny,and with her fingertips and palms she clings to his camisole.
Sh clings to him and Aegon doesn’t feel any weight,he doesn’t feel any pain,no discomfort.Then at least one thing shines certain and bright in his mind:she has become the very consistency of his body.She has entered his limbs,without him noticing,and she is so close to him,beyond the blood and the breaths,that her hand is now an extension of his,her chest is his,her back is his,her lips are his.
And they would be able to see it,all perfectly together in the faces of their children.
And it is not a mere matter of possession,just an arranged marriage to unite two houses,this is not the truth and it will never be.It is something ancestral,like being destined to meet her,being destined to belong to it,being destined to live there,despite time and space.
Aegon and Y/n were sitting on the opposite ends of a timeline,at two distant points in human life, so far away that they saw each other like blurred halos,and they wanted so much to find the other,they have desired it so much,so much,that they have decided to tilt the axes of existence,to hang on to them,and to reunite with an interweaving of hands.
They had bent their faces,touched their souls by ticking of nails,and nothing was the same again.What a stupid mistake they made,something that their innocent son will pay one day.
Aegon felt like he was on fire,his whole body was trembling and his heart ached in his chest«Y/n…I…I-»but what could he tell her?
He could push her away from him,go ahead and just do it,but on his bones he will still find her shape and her footprints.If he looked for her,looked for her in him,he would find that she was everywhere.
«Y/n,I’m…I’m really sorr-»he tried to choke out what he could.
«Do you know what I wanted when I first looked inside a puddle?»Y/n didn’t let him finish,instead she kept stroking his face lovingly to help him calm down.
Aegon doesn’t move and she puts her index finger against his right temple,light.He knew that,from where she was from,it usually rained during the end of the summer and that she loved playing outside with her siblings and mother.She was the one that taught Y/n to look inside poodles and to dance in the rain,something that she would teach her future children too.
«I wished I could see myself.I wanted it intensely,I really wanted it with all my strength,as I never wanted anything in life.»Y/n started to explain him.
All of her life was planned for her,from the moment she came to the world,by her father that only saw his daughter as piece of chess to move on the board in order to gain power.She didn’t even knew who she was if not Lady Y/n,a proper and polite young girl ready to marry in the royal house.But now she knew who she was,what she liked to eat,to read,what to do in her free time and it was all thanks to Aegon that had shown her how to be selfish for the first time and to live for herself.
«And I see myself now,I can see myself,but I'm not happy.Because I have a new wish,much more important:that you can see yourself in the same way I see you,the way our children already see you.Then yes,i would be happy.We would both be happy.»she told him,sincerely with a little smile on her beautiful face.
Y/n had plundered his last feelings,which were nothing more than bread crumbs left attached to the eaten crusts.If the world fell,the sun fell,all the snow,the hail,the rain and the lightning fell,even the rainbow.He will make fire pour from the sky,he will spill blood just to keep his family alive and safe besides him.
Aegon doesn’t say anything,he moves forward on top of her and kisses her one again.He has a wish now:time.The only thing he wanted was time,more time to see his children grow up and become beautiful people,time to spend with them and to teach them how the world works,to help them and hold their hands,to protect them when they were scared and to remains them that he will love them forever.More time with Y/n,to love and cherish her,to grow old with her,to make her smile and laugh at the most inappropriate times,to caress her sweet face at night as he watches her sleep.He just wanted more time,he deserved it.
«How about,the next time that rains,we go outside,just us.»Aegon murmurs on her lips«I have a wish to make.»he continued with a small smile.
And he prayed the gods,whoever could listen to him,that it would become true the moment Y/n giggled and nodded her head.He hoped but hope can do nothing against an already written destiny and then he will be ready to go to war.
#house of the dragon#hotd#hotd spoilers#house of the dragon spoilers#aegon ii targaryen#house of the dragon x reader#hotd x y/n#hotd x reader#hotd x you#aegon ii targaryen x reader#aegon targaryen imagine#aegon targaryen x reader#aegon x reader#aegon targaryen#team green#dance of the dragons#x reader#asoiaf x reader#got x reader#fire and blood spoilers#blood and cheese#hotd season 2 spoilers#hotd season 1#imagine#angst#hotd angst#helaena targaryen#jaehaerys targaryen#jaehaera targaryen#fluff
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The Laugh of Nero
chapter: 4 chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | 5
pairing: emperor geta/emperor caracalla x acacius' daughter!reader
summary: General Acacius faces the consequences of his conspiracy, while his daughter unexpectedly meets Emperor Caracalla alone for the first time.
warning(s): mention of violence | mention of alcohol | swearing | semi-edited | english is not my first language, faults may occur | please let me know if i missed anything
Note: -
word count: 3.6k
Romans loved the story of old philosopher Seneca. He was once the teacher of Emperor Nero almost 200 years ago and although body was dead, his life continued through writings: one of it being the drama 'Octavia'. It was a popular play in the amphitheaters of Ancient Rome and beyond. And it was a favorite of yours.
The plot focused on three days during which the Emperor divorced and exiled his wife Claudia Octavia and married another, his lover Poppaea Sabina. It was indeed a tragedy, that gave the audience a glimpse into the madness of Nero, the wisdom of Seneca and the tragedy of Octavia. Oh how you could relate to Octavia. The divergence between her fear, hatred and sadness against her will to withstand and be wiser than what was thrown against her, it intrigued you. Somehow you felt the same in your current situation. On the one handside you feared the future and displeased the attention of the Emperors on you, yet you wanted to do everything to persevere. In a way, the stoic nature of Seneca's character in this play gave you some kind of guidance too. Stoicism, maybe you needed to stick to that even more as you were not able to control your surroundings as it seemed?
You took your seat in the upper-ranks of the amphitheater, accompanied by two of your closest friends. Cicero was one of the grandsons of senator Gracchus and now served as one of the senate’s transcriptors for as long as he was not old enough to candidate for a political mandate himself. The other one was Lydia, the daughter of General Britannicus, who fought alongside your father countless of times and was now fighting with his legions in the far north of the Empire. "Oh, i hope Scato is going to play Octavia this time! The last time i saw him in the role of Electra - it was just mesmerizing. He is just so handsome", Lydia sighed, as she always seemed to be that actor's number one supporter. You and Cicero laughed in response before you gave your friend a small pat on the shoulder. "I already heard that you approached him after the last play. Beware actors, Lydia. They might be charming, but they're also free spirits," you explained with a smirk on your lips, before Cicero added. "Oh everyone would run, when they hear about her father."
"Come on! Stop it! I am just daydreaming! I know he will never let me spend time with someone that isn't a boring military officer!" Lydia turned her face away because she turned completely red, but as she did, she noticed the black armory of the Praetorian guards, who escorted one of the Emperors to the royal box of the Amphitheater. "y/n, Cicero, look!"
You quickly turned your eyes to the scene and your face went pale in an instant, when you saw the luxurious decorated robe, the blonde-ginger hair and the golden laurel wreath. That profile, the curved nose and the make up... you instantly noticed, which brother was here to witness the play of 'Octavia'.
Nero.
In that very moment, he turned his head in an attempt to take a look at the crowd and you tried your best to keep your head low, while your sight was locked to the stage in front of you.
"Is everything alright, y/n?", Cicero asked irritated, while he tried to make sense of your sudden change of behavior.
"Yes, yes i just... i've never seen Emperor Caracalla here."
"Really? He comes to the theater quite often to watch plays", Lydia managed to say, before the crowd slowly fell silent as the first actor slowly walked on stage. The young woman next to you blushed and you could feel Lydia's hand clinging on your arm as if she needed something to hold on - the actor was indeed Scato and the costume he wore was 'Octavia' - a flowing robe with a long, curled wig and extravagant make-up that captured the sadness of her character perfectly.
But you couldn't really focus. Your eyes went to the royal box, the best place to watch the play in a comfortable isolation from the rest of the spectators. Here he sat, accompanied by an entourage of 'friends' and a little monkey which sat on his lap. Suddenly his eyes went from the stage over the crowd and suddenly, he saw you. Your heart sunk to your feet and you instantly turned back to the stage to witness Scato's monologue. He had seen you... and what you were not able to witness now was how he turned to one of his Praetorian Guards, to which he whispered an order.
You tried to keep calm as you stared at the stage, where Octavia was now accompanied by a chorus, who wept for the terrible treason she had to endure when Nero decided to take another woman as his wife. Meanwhile your fingers clinged into the fabric of your toga-styled dress as you gathered your thoughts. You still recalled the words you'd talked with him at the Collosseum - the way you had his attention. Women would kill for what you were able to get if you just continue - but then you heard the words of your father, you saw his worried eyes in front of you and you knew something was terribly wrong.
You were so encaptured in your own thoughts that Lydia grabbed your arm again, but this time it was not because she was about to fall for the man on stage, but because a Praetorian Guard was standing right at the side of your seats and pointed at you. "You. Follow me," he ordered in a very demanding tone, while your friends looked at you in shock. They didn't know what you'd witnessed before, so you grabbed their hands and just gave them an encouraging smile. "Don't worry about me, we see each other soon, alright?", you whispered before you stood up and followed the guard upstairs to the place where Emperor Caracalla had his seat.
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"y/n, what a pleasant surprise to meet you here! Please, take a seat!", you heard the voice of Emperor Caracalla as you stepped into the royal box of the amphitheater and bowed to him.
"Leave us, Go!", he hissed quickly to his entourage, who - without a word - got up from their seats and left as quickly as they could, but not without giving you a two-faced look. It was almost as if they already knew something you didn't, as if they both pitied and envied you at the same time. You hold their glances to not give in to any mockery they might've had in their minds and would speak out to each other when they were gone. Then it was only you and the young Emperor,... and his pet monkey, which was seemingly busy eating grapes from a bowl of fruit.
With slow, careful movements you approached the seats in the front and sat down beside Caracalla, his eyes never leaving you as you did. "A funny coincidence, is it not? I remember that we talked about 'Octavia' and here we are now", he chuckled, while he leaned back and for a moment, he watched the stage, where Seneca approached Nero about the divorce of his first wife.
"A coincidence, indeed", you answered and followed his glance. There he was, the mad Emperor, who complained about the unfair treatment of him through his own mother, which he cursed over and over again. At that point she was already dead - believed to be murdered by an order of Nero himself.
"You haven't fully answered me back then, when i asked why you see yourself as Nero". The question came from your mouth while you still followed the actor's movements in his luxurious decorated robes, a red wig on his head - it somehow reminded you of Caracalla.
"The play is written to portray him as a monster, am i sitting next to one?"
Maybe it was almost too bold to ask that. You already regretted speaking those words out loud, when his view instantly switched to you, his blue eyes digging into you like a sharp blade. Suddenly, he simply burst into a resounding laughter, that made your lose your breath for a moment, as you stared at him with irritation.
"Gods, you're really amusing", Caracalla grinned wide, showing off his gold tooth. Nonetheless he gave you an answer. "It depends..."
He raised his hand and let his little monkey climb on it. When he reached his shoulder, Caracalla took a grape and fed it to the animal, before it started to groom his wild hair. Not caring about it, he continued. "Everyone views Nero as mad for breaking the chains that his mother and his predecessor layed on him. He never loved Octavia, yet he had to marry her. He never wanted to be Emperor, yet he became one. His mother tried to control him, so much so, that he needed to get rid of this old hag." The last words were almost a hissing tone, as if he was speaking of something he could truly relate to.
"Now everyone is plotting against him, the Gods, his damned first wife, his teacher, all of Rome, only because he started to follow his own path and married the woman he loved. A tragedy, truly - not just for Octavia, don't you think?"
He looked straight into your eyes, waiting for your answer and you sensed that this was a key moment, where you could say something wrong. In a way, you could see what he meant, but there was something he didn't see. Nero broke the chains, yes, but he broke them with cruelty, murder and terror.
"Isn't everything in our lives a tragedy?", you asked and it seemed to please Caracalla, as his bright grin returned, before he turned to the stage once more, crawling his pet monkey while he followed the next scene.
Oh how he could relate to those words. No one could understand the tragedy of his own life, always being seen as the underestimated, 'weaker' and younger brother. But he enjoyed this talk more than he was willing to admit. And he was sure that you were able to understand him to a certain degree, the first woman to do so.
Suddenly, his pet jumped over to you, climbing onto your shoulder and taking a strain of hair to look at your curls.
"Dondus, no! Don't hurt the fair lady!" In an instant, Caracalla jumped from his seat, but before he tried to take the monkey again, he noticed your sudden yet beautiful laugh and how you reached out to pat Dondus carefully, softly, with your filigran fingers. How he wished that those fingers would touch him in that very moment, while his hands stiffened.
"It is fine, please - don't worry", you said quickly, since the monkey didn't hurt you in any way - in fact the way he climbed on your shoulders, touched your hair with his tiny fingers and groomed them with interest in his dark eyes, was very cute. And your reaction was honest.
"I think, he likes you", Caracalla mumbled, while he returned to his seat, still watching you how gentle you were with Dondus, one of his only 'real friends'. It was his own pet, his alone and caring for him often calmed his mind. Just as you did in this very moment since no word came from his mouth - he just watched. Why, just why does he have to share you with Geta soon...
Slowly he reached for his cup of wine and poured it down in an attempt to numb his thoughts over this damn fact.
"You said you see yourself in Octavia, but you could be Poppaea", he whispered, his eyes locked on yours.
"I could be," you responded, the focus laying on 'could', while you were still playing with the little monkey. In a way you started to find your path in this game. "Either way my fate would end in death then."
Caracalla laughed boisterous once again in response to your words, while he raised his cup. "And yet you would live in delight instead of agony. Let us toast to the inevitable death of us all". You took your cup and followed his toast.
"To the tragedy of us all." As you drank a first sip of your wine, you still saw how he looked you straight into the eyes. It was clear that he just waited for the next chance to say something and this time he was closer than before, leaning over the armrest of his throne. The Emperor was close enough for you to smell the scent of his perfumes and the wine on him.
"I just know we will have a lot of fun, once we see each other more often," he chuckled. His words hit you, but you tried your best not to drop your mask of neutrality. You'd almost began to enjoy this conversation up to this point. What did he mean by that?
Should you ask? No, it would be terribly impolite to question something like that in the presence of an Emperor. Only your lips parted, while you searched for your next words. Caracalla was the one to grin again, his gold tooth shimmering in the lights that came from the stage of the theater. And his next words rang through your ears like a bell.
"Don't forget to thank your dear father, once you're back home."
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Marcus Acacius walked through the hallways of the Imperial Palace, escorted by the Praetorian Guard. He was not in chains, but wore his dark brown leather armor with the wine red whool cloak and his helmet under his arm - the armor of a General. In fact, he didn't really know why he was even here in the first place. It was quite early for a new war campaign, but he stopped to question them long ago anyways. It wouldn't be a surprise, if the Emperors had already found a new target for their obsession. The mere hunger for expansion was enough to never satisfy both Geta and Caracalla, who simply took military like Acacius and moved them on a map as if they were simple toy figures. The glory of Rome was what they promised the people, yet all the older man had seen was death and despair over and over again - even though he always came back with a victory laurel wreath on his head. What an irony.
The fact that everything was like the last times he was called to the palace, made him unobservant to the fact that he was walking straight into a trap. He was sure that his secret was still a secret - that he and the senators were safe in a way. Maybe safe enough to carry out their plan once the time was ready for it. How wrong he was on this...
When he stepped into the throne room, the guards behind him closed the door and he greeted Emperor Geta according to the protocol in situations like these. "My Emperor", he said with his fist on his chest and his eyes locked on the young man, who stood in front of one of the two elaborately designed thrones, which were placed on a platform at the center of the room.
"General Acacius! It is good to see you again. Come forward...," Geta called and his waving hand was a signal for him to move, to come closer. As he did, Marcus noticed that the other twin was missing, but this wasn't a surprise too since Caracalla was often 'occupied' with other things. In reality, he simply hated politics and rather threw himself into diffent forms of pleasure in an attempt to escape the stuffiness.
They were not alone, a couple of Praetorian guards stood at their distinct positions as they always did and therefore the general simply ignored them.
Meanwhile Geta had to force himself to keep a straight face, when the traitor approached him as if nothing happened at all, as if he was not about to put a sword into his neck with those filthy senators - just as Julius Caesar got betrayed by his kin and the senate as well. The young Emperor would not let this happen again.
"Tell me, General, why did i call for you?"
Acacius brows furrowed, while he looked to the map table, which was standing alone in front of the great window. It was untouched.
"I thought you might answer me that, your Grace. The last time we talked, you granted me a pause before i will regroup my legions in Ostia and start the next campaign in Numidia."
Geta's laughter filled the room in response to the General's words and it took him even more strength to not scream at him.
"Oh, don't worry, Acacius. This plan hasn't changed yet."
Yet. A feeling of unease creeped up his body, as he stood still, his eyes locked on the pale, gingerblonde royal, who stood in front of him in a toga of black and gold.
"But let us be honest now, shall we? I question your loyality to me and my brother, to Rome. As i know, you're meeting with members of the senate," Geta called out and even though this was true, Acacius kept a straight face, hiding his fear in trained perfection.
"As you know, my dear wife is the daughter of senator Galba. Is it now regarded as treason to meet with my father-in-law?"
Geta stepped forward, closing the distance between him and Acacius in an instant, while his jaw clenched in anger. His mind was like a volcano, ready to erupt at any second.
"Do you think we're fools!?", he hissed with an even more aggressive undertone that grew louder with each word. Marcus had to tackle the urge to say 'Yes', in fact there was even so much more he wanted to say right now. That they were tyrants, mad, arrogant and overall spoiled little brats, which he cursed at every given second of his life.
"We know what you're up to Acacius - a snake amongst the men we regarded as the most loyal to our father and to us. How dare you turn against us and plot with those maggots from the senate, even though you've seen that they were not able to rule an Empire for yourself! Have you no respect for Emperor Septimius Severus, who gave you all what you're now!?"
It was too late, he obviously knew. And Acacius was not even able to put in words how much he hated himself for not being able to keep it as a secret long enough. It not only put his own life in danger but the rest of his family too, his wife... his daughter. His jaw clenched at the mere thought of the consequences that might errupt in the aftermath of this audience. Yet he couldn't hold back what was laying under his tongue for so long: "You father still holds my greatest respect and loyalty even after his passing... may the gods grant him peace in elysium. But i've seen your shortcomings many, many times. You lack the wisdom and restraint he had, yes maybe even the love he had for Rome and its people. You and your brother are not worthy of the crowns he placed upon your heads."
Geta's eye twitched and he grabbed a dagger, placing it right in front of Acacius' throat. His whole body trembled in pure wrath at the audacity of that General's words.
"I should kill you now Acacius! I should kill you and all those filthy senators for that treason!", he screamed at him, while his opponent only responded with a cold and collected gaze. This look alone made him Geta even more aggressive and hateful towards Marcus, but killing him would only create another problem - so he went with the path he had already planned in his mind.
"My brother was right, you are a Brutus. But we're not Julius Caesar", Geta hissed against Acacius, leaning his head to the side for a moment, as he studied his stern facial expression. Oh how much he hated it that he didn't fear him. The Emperor wanted to change that.
"We should start all over again, shall we? As a hero of Rome, the people won't be pleased with you being crucified publically... But we can still kill your wife... your daughter?", he started and noticed how - even for a second - the corners of Acacius' mouth twitched, as if he wanted to say something against this. Now there was fear, something Acacius tried desperately not to show, but Geta still noticed.
A wide, knowing smile appeared on his face and he nodded in silent agreement. "Ah, now you see the consequences. Yes, i am not above killing you kin and let you watch... but it would be such a shame, such a waste... especially for your beautiful daughter. I wonder how you will explain to her, that you threw her young life away because of your pride"
The blade of his dagger was dangerously close as the tip touched his skin at his neck, while Acacius stood in an almost frozen position.
"I have a proposal for you, Acacius...it is the only option to safe your own life and the ones of those you love the most - wed your daughter to me."
Geta's word hit Marcus like a lightning bolt. His eyes widened in response to the request of the Emperor in front of him. And his heart broke in that very moment.
"I will not sell out my daughter like this", he answered with a firm tone in his voice, but Geta only smirked and leaned forward, whispering in his ear with an amused undertone. He knew that Marcus wasn't able to say 'No' in any way. He loved his daughter too much to watch her die.
"One option, General. She either becomes my wife - and i will make her Empress of Rome. Or she will be crucified alongside your pathetic senators..."
He would always choose her life, but at what cost.
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#gladiator 2#gladiator ii#emperor caracalla#emperor geta#general acacius#geta x reader#caracalla x reader#joseph quinn#pedro pascal#fred hechinger#gladiator ii fic#kabuki writes
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