#then i tried to be friends w everyone and it didnt work because i hated them all and i just kind of felt. hollow.

[fallowfield]

trust me the transition from weird (read: autistic) to mean to chill is not an uncommon one. and good lord am i seeing it

[kenlvry]

angry confessions

c; getting into an argument abt something then saying “why u care” and yhhhh, angry confessions speak for itself, aged up 16-17 kenny kyle and stan

kenny mccormick

kenny wasn’t really fazed when something bloody happened, having died millions of time before, he got used to it. but when he saw you and some girl fighting he almost yelled stop loudly tryna be the main character, he let the fight happened bc he knew you hated it when someone pulls you away from a fight, it made it seem like you lost.

after the fight that you won you were frustrated and walked away home bc school alr ended, kenny ran to you and yelled at you “ what the fuck y/n?? you know how fucking dangerous that was?? you looked so fucked up” he said while holding a first aid kit, you couldnt care less how you look, “ y/n! are you even listening?? y/n” he said and walked infront of you, 

“fuck kenny what?, can i not get into a fight? idgaf how i look, she asked for it” “are you hearing yourself rn?? what if you fractured something?? cmon sit down so i can check” he touched your arm “don’t touch me” you said sternly, he let go and you walked away, he wasn’t going to let you go like that so he grabbed your arm again “omg kenny why the fuck do you care so much?! why do you care if i got into a fight!?” “ because i like you dumbass!” your eyes widen and so does kenny “w-what...” you said “ now let me treat you, cmon” he said checking you hands while blushing ,

after that it got somewhat awkard but you two def act more close than ever

stan marsh

you were hanging out with a boy, not just any other boy but a boy that was known as the most violent kid at school, people said the boy always got into fights, smokes behind the school and disrespects teachers. but there you were talking and laughing with him, it made stans heart twist, after you were done talking to the boy stan went over and talked to you to warn you abt him.

“yo y/n why were you talking to him js now?” you looked at stan then at the boy, “who him?” you looked over to the boy and stan nodded “because... hes my friend? plus i have him for my science partner so we were talking abt when to meet up” you said smiling and walking away “hold on, yk who he is right?? stay away from him, he’s dangerous!” stan said pulling your arm “cmon stan stop over reacting he’s sweet, he even promised to buy me lunch!” you said pulling away from him, “still! im going to talk to mr garrison abt this, i’ll ask so you and me are on the same team” he said and walked away, now youre the one pulling his arm

“the fuck? dont, its none of your business” he was so shocked at how defensive you got over the kid “its too! what if you got hurt,infact i’ll make sure for future projects that requires two people us two are already on one” he tried walking away again, “stan! dont butt in! let me be, hes not as dangerous as people potray him!” you said slightly raising your voice “ i’m not risking it.” he said crossing his arms also raising his voice slightly “ why the fuck do you care??! you never cared before!” you yelled looking angry “because i love you y/n! bc i care for you! how have you not realize it by now geez!” he yelled back, you sat there shocked with a slight tint of pink on your cheeks he coughed a little breaking the tension “ now cmon, you wanna change partners or not” he looked away refusing to make eye contact, you nodded. 

the whole time you two were working on the project you two blushed and smiled literally acted like you two never met

kyle broflovski

although you looked like a very untroubled person, you also had problems you wished would go away. so often times you and some other kids would smoke at the back of the school before school starts, its a way for you to release stress before school starts.

everyone kinda knew, the way you smelt when school starts it was too obvious,not to kyle i guess.. people didnt tell him bc they thought he knew! you thought he knew too tbh, but he thought it was from your dad or someone in your family, he believes your not one to get into that shit

school started and you scrapped your cig bud on the wall and threw it in a bin that was prepared by one the kid who smoked, as much as he smoked he cared for the environment too yk even though he's literally ruining it by smoking .when you came in the smell was strong, kenny smiled knowing what you did before school "smells strong y/n, things got tough huh?" he smiled while laughing a little "atp y/ns lung is gonna be all black like her heart" cartman added "is your dad okay y/n? he shouldn't smoke infront of his kids" kyle tried chiming in which made all five of you stop in your tracks. you looked at each other in confusion

"kyle, y/n dad isnt even alive" and kyle eyes was widen, he never asked bc he thought your dad was messed up and didn't wanna triger you. "wait then why does y/n smell like smoke" "bc she the one that smokes dumbass" kyles eye widen even more. with a little brother who used to vape and a bestfriend who drinked he was scared you'd be addicted too so he asked to talk to you separately.

"the fuck y/n?? smoking is so bad for you, you have to stop right now!" kyle got mad "ugh its none of your business,you literally used to smoke and how come you've only find out now?" you said rolling your eyes "thats not important! that shit can fuck up your lungs," "okay dad" you laughed a little and he got mad, he reach for your pockets and took away the packet of cigarettes you had "what the fuck kyle give them back, a teachers gonna see!" "no! not until you say you're gonna quit and start going to school with us from now on" he held the packet of cigarette high so you couldn't reach em

"why do you care?! why do you care if my lungs go all black and fade away? thats my problem!" "because i like you!" he said bringing the pack down and sighed "i like you y/n and I'm scared i might loose you so please, stop doing this" you blushed at the sudden confession

you didn't entirely quit, it was hard quitting something you always did as a routine so kyle would allow you only two times a week and gradually move from there<3

[toxycodone]

i understand its all joaks and its lighthearted out of love for this character but it is a little sad to see things like laios being a minimum wage worker and having no friends being described as him being a loser when theyre extremely common autistic experiences 💔 because to be honest i think youre really cool and a great writer and i would like to interact more but it makes me go, is that what you would think of me? my life situation’s not too different from that. anyways i hope you have a nice day <3

no not at all I genuinely like being mean to Laios so take everything I say about him with the world's biggest effing grain of salt because I am just. mean to him in particular lol. i like to kick him when he's down. (evil and mean but to blonde men in particular)

but like. i am not cool at all. like...........ill put it under the cut but yeah.

real shit under the cut bc this ask is making me think! im gonna be real w u nonnie

tl:dr if u dont wanna see whats under the cut:

this ask kinda makes me think bc. i think im really mean to laios too bc he reminds me of myself beforehand (zero self confidence and suicidal idealization) sigh and I really hate being reminded of that. so. again. im really biased when it comes to him specifically and that doesn't apply to you or any of my followers.

and for what its worth i am sorry for making you feel that way.

but also. i gotta say I can 100% relate to him and you. this time last year I was working at Starbucks ( i could only tolerate 4 hour shifts bc i would get overstimulated and my coworkers lowkey hated me.) and had like. 1 friend from high school and the years before that I spent turbo online being constantly pushed out of friend groups bc i could NEVER get anything right socially. I swear the first 23 years of my life I never lived. i went thru hs and college as a fucking. like. creature I felt like i couldnt connect w anyone because I was too tormented by adhd + autism and i was INSANELY depressed and coping w lack of control by having an eating disorder and being doped the fuck up on stimulants. (MY PCP gave me 56 mg of concerta and 5mg booster of adderall i was fucking tweaking on the daily </3)

but like. i started going to therapy and a psychiatrist who made me quit cold turkey for my own good and we started treating my depression and debilitating anxiety (i was convinced a stranger was living in my house in secret but also that everyone in public who saw me was revolted by me and genuinely wanted me to kill myself jkdhsfskdjh i told you i was tweaking)

anyways. i was a druggie with no goal in life and living in my own head and now like. i can look at myself in the mirror and not think "hey. this fat ugly piece of shit should genuinely die" and now people in real life LIKE me. I have friends. multiple friend groups, actually. WITH NOT JUST ND PEOPLE. LIKE, A LOT OF THEM ARE NEUROTYPICAL. And i am very open about being autistic with them and i dont have to mask.

and they still like me! and invite me places! and genuinely want to hang out with me! and they think im smart and get uncomfortable when I say im stupid or too autistic to like. be able to be in public.

it still feels like a dream and in my mind im like "they actually are gonna drop you and make fun of you for thinking they were ever your friends" or like "theyre just doing this bc of the stupid buddy system shit or they think you're a pet this is highschool all over again"

but even tho im haunted by this. its....I can say with confidence its not true.

anyways. i know people say this shit all the time but I will say you are very capable of love and not a loser or anything like that. the thing you're missing out on is the right people. i didnt believe this for most of my life and tried to get myself killed because of it but im glad I didn't because it is genuinely true.

i have spent the last <1 year of my life genuinely being alive. and i wouldn't trade it for anything. idk if thats a sign for anyone yeah. take it

[suffarustuffaru]

im back on my reinhard/julius agenda but hear me out okay.

au where they become friends much sooner. childhood friends au.

julius’s whole world shakes when he goes to the knighting ceremony for children of noble knighting houses and he sees reinhard there—reinhard, whos powerful and Amazing and intimidating and it makes julius realize that hes far behind reinhard. it makes julius realize that he has to work harder to reach reinhards level of skill and power. but hes all starry-eyed, and he manages to catch reinhard after the ceremony and starts excitedly talking reinhards head off because reinhard is just so—awe inspiring—and ten-year-old julius at this point has way less filter and impulse control so why shouldnt he try and get close with reinhard of all people?

meanwhile reinhard is even more depressed after recently being 1. officially knighted and 2. officially given the “van” title and 3. his dad is gradually getting worse and he feels like its his fault, but julius is the first person around his age that actually shows interest in befriending him, so reinhard is just awkwardly going along with it because he doesnt want to chase julius away. hes super SUPER eager to finally have a friend. thats what they are right?? hopefully?? and reinhard is desperately holding onto this because yeah, julius likely wont like him anymore real soon, but itll be good while it lasts right?? he doesnt even mind that julius keeps asking questions about knighthood and training, because everyone does that anyway, so reinhard offers to help train julius and BAM they are now gonna meet regularly 👍

joshua meanwhile is Suffering even more than he already was because not only did julius develop an infatuation with reinhard, joshua also—like in canon yeah—faints during the knighting ceremony because FUCK I CANT LIVE VICARIOUSLY THROUGH JULIUS IF HES GONNA BECOME FIXATED ON REINHARD AND LEAVE ME BEHIND AND ALSO I HATE REINHARD AND JULIUS FOR BEING SO PERFECT, and then joshuas worst nightmare becomes true because reinhard notices this and offers to help joshua and julius home, and julius accepts of course, and joshua wakes up to reinhard and julius being buddy buddy and then reinhard starts visiting the juukulius mansion regularly so joshua is absolutely SEETHING. SEETHING.

anyway reinhards regular visits go great 👍 all he has to do is walk (Travel At Extremely Extremely Fast Speeds) to julius’s house and back 👍👍 and it doesnt take much time for julius to get out his favorite books and info dump excitedly to reinhard because reinhard of course will listen to all of this and feel all warm inside because 1. oh are we friends now? 🥺 and 2. aw julius is so passionate about this 🥰 but then it takes a turn because of course julius has his hero worship with REID ASTREA. theres a tappei qna that confirms that reinhard Knows what reid was like, and if reinhard knows that at this point, he just sits there awkwardly while julius goes on and on about how cool and awesome reid was.

reinhard then has to decide whether to break the news to julius or not, but given how in canon julius didnt know what reid was like until he actually met reid, reinhard probably didnt tell him if reinhard knew at that point. so little eight year old reinhard sits there and goes “aha yeah… reid… what an interesting person…” which then turns the subject to reinhards family, which then leads into some talk about julius’s family too—but while julius is more likely to open up a tiny bit, reinhard is more like “my father is a good person who tries his best ����” and julius is like “i hear that hes. kind of not. but ill take your word for it i guess haha i mean IVE never met the guy” (he recognizes reinhard getting Upset about this subject) and reinhard is like “my father is a good person yes 🙂”

meanwhile alviero juukulius is very aware of all those nasty rumors about heinkel astrea and the astreas in general and alviero is Very Aware about his nephew/adopted son’s budding friendship with reinhard, who now regularly shows up to the mansion via Speed Walking, but alviero is like. well reinhard is a very well meaning child, i just hope no drama comes out of this haha.

anyway one day little ten year old julius with his Reduced filter and impulse control (tappei has said that younger julius was a Bit of a troublemaker) goes “reinhard you should sleep over at my house please 🥺 and maybe we should sneak out of my house past curfew and go on an adventure or something lol” and reinhard is like going ??? because of course breaking rules almost never occurs to him and the idea of breaking one makes him anxious. but julius is like “cmooon please 🥺🥺 itll be fun 🥺🥺 we’ll be out and back here so fast, no ones gonna know, itll just be us 🥺🥺” and reinhard of course 1. cant say no and 2. julius would be very happy if he agreed, so he goes along with it. they go have fun they have some kind of adventure and for a moment reinhard forgets all about all the Various Pressures he is under <3

and then they go back to julius’s house and alviero is waiting there casually like “snuck out again julius? *insert exasperated sigh*” and reinhard FREEZES UP hes like “oh sir ahah its not julius’s fault. it was all my idea actually. all mine. i dragged him along with me. you should punish me instead. im really really sorry i broke the rules sir” because he’s afraid julius will REALLY get in trouble. and julius and alviero stare at reinhard like he grew another head because “jesus christ its not that deep, youre not in That much trouble. im just gonna like ground julius for a bit, its not like im gonna. kill him. or anything.” and also “JESUS CHRIST YOU ARE NOT OKAY??”

anyway yeah reinhard is a very welcome visitor to the juukulius mansion (unless youre joshua) but every time he goes home, carol and grimm help make sure reinhard’s visits arent noticed. but. well. one day heinkel will notice. its inevitable, especially when eventually reinhard and julius will officially join the knights together. and heinkel will probably give this nasty little laugh and go “well. have fun while that lasts.”

and it doesnt last.

[splatoon-edits]

Garlic anon here,

Got any predictions or hopes for Side Order since it's releasing in just 2 weeks?

(Personally I'm hoping other octoling DJs like Paul and Warabi show up somewhere somehow, also hoping for an Agent 4 cameo)

OH MY GOD YEAH I DO!

HI GARLIC ANON NICE TO SEE YOU THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME AN EXCUSE TO RAMBLE BECAUSE I AM GOING TO EXPLOSE IN ANTICIPATION OF SIDE ORDER

Agent 4. First and foremost this is the top of my list. I would love to have them appear in full 3d (and be available to see/have their own dedicated place on the map like captain 3 is cuz i want to take pictures. but thats less important) but honestly at this point ill even take them just being mentioned. it would suck if they were the only agent to not show up at all in 3 but like PLEASE JUST LET ME KNOW THEY ARE OK AND WELL WHERE DID YALL LEAVE 4 ARE THEY JUST STATIONED ELSEWHERE ARE THEY FOCUSING ON PERSONAL/NON NSS STUFF PLEASE MENTION MY DARLING BABY- ahem sorry im very normal

No dedf1sh villain :( i mean i ould be fine with it from a storytelling point if its good. but like. i want to imagine acht being ok after all this. pls let her be fine and ok. like on one hand it would be cool. but on the other hand... thats my baby pls dont make her evil :(

NO MARINA VILLAIN EITHER. well like. this is more subjective. but like. no like intentional "i wanna take over the world and do harm" kind of villain. if shes responsible for the bad stuff in an indirect or unintentional way id be ok w that. like idk she tried to do smth and it got out of hand? but if its just "ooh isure do hate the splatfest results so now im gonna turn evil >:(" kind of thing i just dont think it would fit her character.

some kind of reward. beyond just beating the dlc obviously. like. its meant to be played over and over and over again, right? i want some sort of reward(s) to work toward to incentivize that. idk i just want smth else to work towards besides just salmon run scales or playing pvp.

im also really looking forward to seeing pearl and 8 together again. i just feel like pearl being the one giving the advice and guidance, potentially without having a voice of reason like marina, is going to be very fun. she says the funniest most unhinged stuff. i adore pearl and i cannot wait to see her.

IM ALSO RLLY LOOKING FORWARD TO FIGHTING ALONGSIDE PEARL. it was SO much fun having little buddy in hero mode. like just having a lil companion who helps u in video games is the best.

at this point i think its time to retire the octoling enemies unless we have a reason for them. they barely made any sense at all in 3, and unless they do something creative with them i just dont think they have a place as enemies again. luckily none of the trailers show enemy octolings, so fingers crossed we don't have to beat up poor mind controlled octolings for a third time.

ok i know not everyone agrees with this. and given how side order looks so far, i dont think/actually want it to happen. but it would be nice to get more deep cut content. we didnt get to actually spend time with them in story mode. they were just antagonists the whole time and then once they joined the players side we got immediately thrust into the final parts of story mode. they didnt really get a chance to shine as friends rather than foe. but ig we already get tosee that on the splatcast. and the story mode is rlly just to show the other side of them we dont get to see on air. so at this point from what we know about side order, it wouldnt make any sense for themto be there. they dont know 8. but early on before we got any trailers and all we knew was that there was going to be a dlc with off the hook,,,, i was hoping for a deep cut cameo... now we have no way for deep cut and off the hook to meet after this. like deep cut and the squid sisters know each other and get along(?). and we know marina is a huge squid sisters fan, and pearl at least knows of them. Plus pearl and marina have met capn cuttlefish and made friends w him. so were probably able to infer that off the hook and the squid sisters have hung out more since octo expansion. i think there is even official art of them together in multiple pictures? so they are obviously friends now. but deep cut and off the hook dont know each other.... SO HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO GET A DEEP CUT, SQUID SISTERS, AND OFF THE HOOK CONCERT. I NEED INTERACTIONS WITH THEM.

honestly i hope they lean into the like... vibes of it all. but this is splatoon. the art and music always gives 130%. like its always good. theres nothing to rlly worry about there.

ok so im hopeing this isnt going to be some fully disconected alternate timeline where none of this affects the normal timeline or characters. im still partial to my own theory of the whole thing being a simulation built by marina in her hopes to see what a world of order would look like. but marina got stuck in it (or is refusing to leave maybe?) it would be unclear to 8 and pearl where in the simulation she is or if she is even here of her own free will or not. so u know 8 also goes into the simulation. and pearl probably doesnt go in, but is able to control the pearl bot from outside the simulation so that she can still interact with the real world. i mean pearl can cover for marina, but if both famous idols suddenly went missing it would be a pretty big panic. or maybe theres some other reason why pearl cant be in there fully. or she is in the simulation fully but for whatever reason she is in the pearlbot form. anyway this would allow us to have the fun of an alternate timeline while the characters are still from out timeline.

SPEAKING OF. if we do get the whole "our version of the characters AND alternate version of the character" thing. i want alternate marina to be the villain. like maybe marina in the simulation/alternate world didnt mean to be a villain, but in her quest for order and safety she ended up hurting others sel expression and creativity and all that. but our marina finds her and is like yo maybe this is... not a great thing. but alternate marina doesnt listen. this would be interesting cuz then pearl and 8 could get messages from marina that seem out of character but nope its just alternate marina boom big reveal. idk man.

ive realized im more theorizing than talking about what i want to see at this pint. so i should uh... probably end it here. cuz i can theorize all day but no ones gonna know whats right till it comes out. anyway yeah my biggest thing i want is probably an incintive of some kind to play over and ver.

also it 5 in the mornaling and i have not slept. so if you see grammar/pselling mistakes? no you didnt. dont ask why im awake(couldnt sleep so i figured id come check tumblr and try and get more requests done but i only actually ot one thing done before egting sidetracked by this ask)

[iheartchv]

I just noticed that your requests are marked as open, so I thought I would send one in 🥰

Could I please ask for a one-shot with Bay Raph and female reader? Could be fluff or even a little NSFW if it’s appropriate. Something along the lines of the best friends to lovers trope. However you want to do it, I know it’ll be wonderful! ♥️😘

Sure, lets see if I can make this sweet and spicy 😏😁 hope this is alright

STRAWBERRY KISSES:

BAY RAPH x F!READER

NSFW below the cut. Everyone is 18+

"This is driving me crazy! I can't keep pretending there isn't something between us. I'm going to tell him/her"

All week long, your boss had been yelling at you for something one of your coworkers did or didn't do. It wasnt your job to watch over everyone else to make sure they were doing their job. You had enough on your plate; you didnt need that. You wouldve snapped if you werent afraid of losing your job. You had enough! You had enough! Life was just treating you not so kindly this time around.

As soon as you got in your car to head home, before starting the ignition, tears just fell down your face with sobs coming out in frustrated crys and grunts. You leaned your forehead against the steering wheel and just let all the shoulder shaking cries go. In the back of your mind, you thought of Raphael... the big, burly, red bandana wearing mutant turtle.

You just wanted to be let his strong arms shield you from the world. He's helped you with your bad days before, and you always felt better afterward. And the banter between the two of you started to become... flirty, so much so that you've let your mind wander in the most arousing places imagining Raph doing those things. He even managed to get into your dreams. You hated to admit it, but you were falling in love with your best friend...

You had to tell him, but not today... there was too much going on right now...

You parked your car and gathered your things to open your door. Your face mustve been a mess but you were going inside to wash the smudged makeup, anyway. Its not like you were expecting company. You entered your apartment and just dropped everything at the door.

"Finally, I feel like I can breath."

You walked into the living room to go into the kitchen but you stopped when you saw Raph, leaning onto the kitchen doorway frame with his arms crossed. You gasped in surprise, and you perked up when you saw him. Your heart raced. "Raph..."

"Hey, Y/n, I... wanted to do something for you because I know how crappy it is at work.. and I..." He had a boquet of roses sitting on your coffee table.

He looked up at you fully and uncurled his arms from across his chest, hurrying toward you. "Hey. What's up? Did something happen?" he asked with concern in his voice. He was getting riled up. "I'm gonna pumble-"

"No, no, it's okay, Raph. I'm fine."

"You dont look fine to me."

"Really, it's fine." You tried to go around him to get into the kitchen. He moved in front of your pathway.

"At least let me show you what I got ya." He had bought chocolate covered strawberries. You played along with his game and hand feed him strawberries, while he teased you when trying to feed you one. When it was his turn he dropped one to steal a kiss from you. You got flustered that you backed away from him.

It was silent for a moment. "Why do you do that when someone's trying to do something nice for you?" His hands rested on your shoulders. You'd been doing that recently.

You wriggled to get out of his grip. "I'm just not in the mood right now." You just wanted to go to your room and sleep the day away. Plus you wanted to keep yourself from throwing yourself at him and kiss him.

"Are you so blind to someone who's trying to tell you that they like ya?"

You looked up at him. "W-what did you say?" Was he saying...?

"I...." he sighed. "Ya drive me crazy." He pressed a kiss onto your lips. Your frantic heart beats coursed hot blood through your veins, you could feel your cheeks burning. When his lips parted, heavy breathing was the only sound between you two.

"Sorry, this is so awkward-"

You grabbed the tails of his bandana to pull him down to your level. Your mouth started kissing him, your body going on autopilot. Screw it! You wanted him, and now you knew that he felt the same toward you.

"I like you, too, Raph. I guess I've liked you all along."

He smirked at you, picked you up, and kissed you back with such passion you felt your toes curl. His hands tangled into your hair, angling your head to kiss you deeper. The makeout session started to get heated. Hands ran all over bodies, exploring and searching. Besides to catch your breath, your lips stayed locked, intertwined.

His moans made you shiver and moan back. Raph's touch sent your skin on fire, even through your clothes. Your mind grew hazy with desire. You showed him how much you wanted this, wanted him.

"Raphael..."

Your arms snaked behind his thick neck, and his hands went down to hold your hips. Flames burned in your lower stomach and further down. His beak nestled in your neck, inhaling your scent. He felt you shiver and moan. "Say it again, babe."

"Raphael~"

Raph adjusted you both to where he was against the wall and you straddled his lap by crossing your ankles around his waist. He moved you back and forth, grinding yourself into his hips and the hardening bulge in his shorts.

"Ohhhhh~ Raphael~ Raphael~" you breathed out.

"Keep saying my name, sweetheart. Let me make ya feel so good, you wont want to get out of bed this weekend." he growled, promising you a night you wont forget.

[calehenituseappreciation]

Tommy thinking Sam Nook and Sam are two different people would lead to such funny senarios.

Especially if you apply this logic to everyone.

what if mexican dream and quackity are the same people and that was just him making fun of dream and making tommy laugh and tommy genuinely thinks dream killed mexican dream and that hes a different person

and when ranboo pretended to be killed by clarencio

he just doesnt realise

he thinks girl dream is someone else too

tubbo genuinely has a bunch of personalities and so he thinks theyre all different people (and also he doesnt realise theyre the same people a lot)

sam, in his normal voice: tommy do you have the- tommy, crying: what happened to sam nook?

sam proceeds to live as sam nook around tommy because he once tried to tell tommy sam nook isnt real and he started sobbing and so sam cant

sapnap, approaching sam on the site: hey sam can you do this for me? sam: su- tommy, running up: SAAAAAAM!? sam, in the sam nook voice: hello tommy! sapnap: wtf??? tommy: this is sam nook! :D have you met him? sapnap: what? thats just s- sam: shakes his head, behind tommy where he cant see sapnap: uhhhhh sam: takes out sword sapnap: h-hi sam nook! tommy: :D

sam is not the only person this happened to. 

tommy: technoblade???? techno, sneaking into l'manberg: uhhh techno, in a highpitched voice: no this is Clarencio tommy: the llama? techno, in high pitched voice: no the pig tommy: hmmm techno: sweats tommy: smiles brightly ok!!!! techno, under his breath: that worked??? tommy: wanna hang out with me? techno, in high piteched voice: i really need to go tommy: buttttttt :(

technoblade proceeds to have to pretend to be clarencio the pig and hang out with tommy all afternoon

phil, coming to check on techno: techno? techno, in a frilly pink dress, in a high pitched voice: hi tommy: phil!!!! have you met clarencio??? but not the llama!!! clarencio the pig!!! phil, holding back a laugh: is that so?

(defenitly happened before he got exiled, i refuse to change my mind)

everytime techno is caught he says hes clarencio (the pig) and tommy vouches for him each time and no one is able to bring themselves to tell him that clarencio (the pig) doesnt exist

sam nook, :handshake: clarencio the pic, :handshake:  mexican dream, (not girl dream) not being able to tell tommy their not real bc hed cry

IMAGINE IF TOMMY WAS GIVEN THE JOB OF LIKE BEING THE BORDER PEOPLE WHILE HE WAS WILBURS VICE BEFORE THE ELECTION AND PEOPLE WOULD JUST FAKE IDENTIES AND TOMMY WOULD JUST BELIVE EVERYONE

quackity: i demand to be allowed to join l'manberg! wilbur: ur american quackity: i shpould still be allowed! wilbur: just say your not, thats what everyone does quackity: what wilbur: just make a fake identity?? quackity: youre... the president???? wilbur: yeah and?? quackity: shouldnt you not be be endorsing that??? wilbur: i made tommy the border person. you think i care? quackity: sksksks quackity: still bad tho

the only one tommy never believes is dream, no matter what, he can just tell when someone is dream, like ya know those police dogs? the only reason he didnt realise girl dream was because girl dream is girl dream he thought it was just a dream thing

TOMMY THINKS BAD AND MONOCHROME BAD ARE TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE

monochrome bad: tommy tommy: whomst? bad: oh uh recolourfies tommy, screaming: WHAT THE FUCK

tommy doesnt have object permanence but for people

techno, while tommy is staying with him: leaves room tommy, crying: I had a big brother once, i dont remember him tho

phil leaves them and (while stabbing wilbur) tommy just doesnt realize its him until techno says "dad?"

quackity works at wendys and tommy goes there everyday but doesnt realise its quackity

tommy went there since the war ended

and at the time didnt realise tommy cant tell and so when he and tommy started a mafia and became friends he thought tommy knew who he was and tommy once suggested going to dennys and quackity is like 'oh my god' and tommy is like my friend works there!!! and then they go to the one quackity works at and quackity is like 'haha funny' and then tommy asks around and then turns to quackity sadly like "my friend isnt here today D:" and then quackity is like o h

tommy, towards sam, in sams house: sam!!!!!! sam, who was sleeping, in his normal voice: w-what? tommy: sam!!! :D sam: hey tommy yawns whyd you wake me up? tommy: sorry but i really needed to ask you a question!!! sam: did you want to ask me where sam nook is again? tommy: welll.. that too but!!! you should meet sam nook!!!! sam: what tommy: please please please sam: no go back what did you ask? tommy: you need to meet sam nook! i think you'd be friends!!! :D sam, internally: shit sam: uhhh i dont really think i should- tommy: pleaasee uses puppy eyes sam: sure sam, internally: why did i say yes????

sam then has to pretend to be sam and sam nook at the same time

tommy: you're gonna love sam nook sam!!!! sam: uhuh tommy: where is he? :( sam: uh maybe hes behind you tommy: turns around to look sam: runs to other side of tommy sam, in sam nook voice: hello tommy!!! tommy: sam nook! have you met sam??? hes right here!!! gestures to sam who has to run behind him again tommy: sam say hi!!! sam, panting, in normal voice: hi tommy: whyre you all out of breath and shit???

this,,, just continues for a while

quackity, watching this exchange, driunking juice: sucks to suck sam: you'd do the same quackity: no. mexican dream is dead lol tommy, only hearing the last part: cries i miss mexican dream quackity, feeling sad: uh- we can revive him maybe? tommy: wipes tears YEAH! sam, whispers to quackity: told you so quackity, hisses to sam : shut up

quackity then has to pretend to revive himself while running around also he has to steal another one of dreams masks

honestly in this au everyone would hear about what happened during exile and stab dream (while pretending to be other people because ig in this au tommy still thinks dream was once his friend and yeh)

tommy, after crying infront of sam nook and telling him what dream did to him: so.. sniffs do you have any more quests for me to do? sam nook: i have one more quest tommy, cheering up: what is it!! sam nook: for myself tommy, confused: what is it? sam nook, taking out a glock: homocide

insanebur: you want to know why no one listens to you tommy? tommy, pouting, on the verge of tears: What? insanebur, unable to finish, clutching his heart: your too cute

this is just au where tommy is baby huh

wilbur isnt mad schlatt exiled him- hes mad he exiled tommy

schlatt and dream are the only ones not affected by tommys baby vibes and thats their downfall

tommy just has to call everyone a nickname, once, and everyone is melted

niki and jack: tommy is the fault of all our probelms we should kill him puffy: he. bonk is bonk baby bonk niki and jack: look over at tommy tommy, with sam in the distance: cries to sam because he cant find sam nook niki and jack: okay... maybe we should be less... violent...

Sam rlly just went

sam: looks at tommyinnit sam: nothing bad will ever happen to this child ever again

huh?

I’ve named this au, au where hes baby ur honour

tommy: i had zero parents (who care) tommy, gestures to puffy and sam: NOW I HAVE TWOOOOOOO

insanebur: god i fucking hate everyone tommy: even me? insanebur: except you tommy

sam: I AM THE TOMMY GAURDIAN! GAURDIAN OF THE TOMMY! sam @ anyone who wants to hurt him: FUCK OFFF

tommy canoanically understands the animal crossing language

ranboo: i can speak enderman! tommy: well i can speak creeper

whenever tommy gets overwhelemed around sam he burys himself he asks sam to cover for him in creeper

okay thats enough of that

[letstalkaboutshtufff]

A Bad Feeling Pt 2

Levi x reader

Pt 2 (Final part)

Pairing : Levi x Cadet reader

Warnings: mentions of attempted rape, mentions of injury, cursing, violence. 18+ only please

***************************************************

Hey guys! Thank you all so much for the wonderful comments! You're all amazing! I did my best to write Levi not ooc, so please lemme know if I did an ok job. This chapter was hard to write so please lemme know what you think! Enjoy!

"Look at me" he was less angry now and more concerned. Because although he would never admit it. He cared for his team deeply and hated to see any of them hurt.

Knowing you couldn't disobey you sucked in a breath and slowly lifted your head up.

And when Levi's steel eyes met your teary ones they turned into one of shock.

Slowly his eyes travelled over your form. His eye brows furrowed at the grip marks that covered your chin. He looked down further and saw that both your wrists were red. His eyes travelled back up and his whole body froze when he saw the angry looking bruise peeking from under your collar.

He stood there in shock for a moment before snapping out it.

"Y/n.." he started slowly, almost gently.

"Tell me what happened" he clenched his jaw when he realized how scared you look. It did not sit well with him that a girl as strong as you ended up in this state.

Tell him?? I can't... Oro said that he would-!

"I-I c-can't" you closed your eyes feeling completely overwhelmed. Levi was going to be so angry with you, but you couldn't risk being expelled from the survey corps.

Had your eyes been open you would've seen the flash of concern that crossed his usually stoic features. Knowing he wouldnt get anywhere with you in that state he asked you to follow him. Not knowing what else to do you did...

************************************

Silently he led you to a room you had never seen before. It was neat and organized, and off to the side you saw a small stove and sink.

You were so out of it, the shock taking over that you didnt even remember being sat down at a small table.

You stared at the wood in silence, listening to some clanging around you for several minutes but snapped out of it when a small plate and tea cup full of something steaming and sweet smelling was put in front of you.

Wordlessly you looked up at your captain who took a seat near you, but far away enough not to add to your nervousness.

"Drink, it'll help" he ordered quietly. And so you did. You both sat in silence until the last drop was gone. You thought he would yell at the clattering noise your cup made every time your shakey hands grabbed it but he didnt. He sat there quiet and silent.

When you were done you let out a small thank you. You felt a tiny bit less shakey but no where near relaxed. How could you be?

Levi silently took the cup, and deposited it in the sink.

When he was finished, he made his way back to you and sat down.

"Y/n, I know you don't wanna talk, but I need to know what happened" he started calmly.

You looked into his eyes and saw that he was patient and not at all angry.

Could you tell him the truth? Oro said that he would ruin your future but if you told captain Levi, would he protect you? Despite his harsh demeanor you knew that Levi did care and protect his team when it came down to it. Even his harsh disciplines were usually for the best. Even if we couldn't see it.

But even so...Oro is his friend... way longer than I've been his cadet...what if I tell him and he talks to Oro and oro tells him something else that he believes over me.

Levi noticed the hitch in your breath and tried to calm you down once more, "Listen to me y/n, Its my job to look out for you, you're safe now" he promised gently, well as gently as he levi could be) you looked and saw sincerety in his orbs. Your mouth formed the shape to speak. But you still were not able.

"If you're not able to tell me what happened yet, I need you to at least give me a name" he tried to reason. You couldn't believe how calm and patient he was being with you. You so desperately wanted to tell him. But you were terrified.

"I-I'm afraid.." you admitted quietly in shame..

Levi felt anger rise within him, not at you no, but at whoever made you like this. He'd seen you take down titans like it was playtime at school. And now you were shaking like a leaf afraid of something he still had no idea what/who caused this.

"Like I said you're safe now-"

" Thats not.." you cut him off, "I-I'm afraid you won't take.... my side.." you admitted as a fresh set of tears ran down your face.

His eyes widened a little at this, did you not trust him?

"Y/n, listen to me" he waited until you raised your teary eyes up to meet his once more.

"You have proven yourself to be nothing but trustworthy during your time as my cadet. You have my word that no matter what you say, I will believe you" he said with finality.

And that was all you needed to hear to unlock the fear that held you back.

"Oro" you whispered.

His eyes widened in utter shock before turning into quiet rage.

"Oro did this.."

************************************

Levi did a remarkable job of holding in his emotions as you told him what happened. You didn't do it all at once. You kept having to pause to collect yourself. And some things were harder to say than others. But slowly you told him everything, his words and what he did.

The whole time you couldn't bring yourself to look at him. Afraid of what emotions his face held. But when you were finished and he stood up, you couldn't help but steal a glance.

You sucked in a breath.

*Ok small teeny tiny spoiler in the next paragraph from season 3*

The last time you witnessed levi in that state was when he fought the beast titan. His body was eerily calm, but his eyes. His eyes held death.

"Stay here" and with that he was gone and you were alone...

************************************

It was torture waiting in that room. What was he going to do? The anxiety of waiting and doing nothing was killing you.

The panic mixed with exhaustion was such a strange feeling to you. Your mind was racing but your body felt on the verge on collapse.

Sighing you threw your head on the table and tucked your arms underneath.

You couldn't help but let your eyes droop.

You were somewhere between a light sleep and a deep one when the click of a door opening made you jolt awake.

"Heichou.." you went to stand but he motioned for you to stay put. To be honest you weren't sure you could stay upright. It felt like you had been thrown off a roof.

"W-what happened?" You couldn't wait another second before asking.

He stared at you for a moment, much more calm than when he had left earlier. "It's taken care of" he said finally.

You waited a few seconds for him to continue but he didn't.

"Um, by taken care of you mean...?" you nervously fidgeted with your hands.

He sighed and walked over to a nearby cabinet, not facing you he replied, "I mean that bastard won't be bothering you or anyone else anymore" you were slightly frustrated by his lack of elaboration.

Before you could press any further he turned around and cut you off, "Forget about it now, we can discuss it in the morning." You nodded hesitantly although all you wanted was some answers.

It was then you noticed that Levi was holding a small med kit in his hands. Before you knew it, he was sitting next to you, scooting the chair slightly closer.

"Hand" you stared blankly at the outstretched hand for a moment in confusion.

Whats he?... oh!

You snapped out of it not wanting to annoy him after all he had done for you by taking too long.

And despite the situation, you somehow found the capacity to still blush like a school girl when his soft hands gripped yours with surprising gentleness.

A comfortable silence filled the room as he got to work tending to your wrists. With more care than you thought he was capable he applied a cool ointment and wrapped them delicately.

You didnt even realize you were crying until you saw a fat tear plop onto the table. Levi looked up at you, pausing his movements.

"S-sorry! I didn't mean to-sorry..."you babbled embarrassed, your words not really making sense. You suddenly felt bad for putting him through all this. And now you couldn't even stop crying like an idiot.

You squeezed your eyes trying to stop the flow, but for some reason you couldn't stop. All the panic and relief caused you to feel so overwhelmed you couldn't help but let it all out. You also couldn't help but to keep apologizing over and over.

"Don't apologize.." your breath hitched at the quiet kindness in his voice. He had surprised you at least 20 times tonight by how gentle he was being. You slowly opened your eyes letting the tears fall freely. It was like the floodgates had opened, "heichou..." you swiped a hand over trying to quell the tears, "thank you" you sobbed out sincerely, not holding back.

And for the 21 time that night you were in utter disbelief when Captain Levi, the cold hearted, sadistic, cruel leader of the survey corps turned in his chair, facing opposite of you, reached a hand over to cradle your head and pulled you into his shoulder.

"It's alright y/n...its alright..." he whispered holding you close. Your wide eyes eventually closed and you clutched the arm cradling you. It was warm and safe and secure, and your heart filled with happiness, because despite everything that had happened, you knew you always could trust him, and maybe it was selfish to think this but a part of you believed that out of everyone on his squad, he only had showed this kindness to you.

************************************

The next morning as you made your way into the hall for breakfast. You couldn't help but feel everything was a bit too normal. Despite your fears, people weren't whispering about you, or giving you looks.

Sighing you found your usual spot by Sasha and Mikasa. Luckily the Mark's on your chin had lessened enough to where you could pass it off as a "I fell out of be and hit my chin on the floor" kinda thing.

After some time the boys joined as well,

"Ne did you guys hear?!" Armin exclaimed suddenly as he placed his tray down.

"Hear what?" Eren asked chewing on a piece of bread.

"About Captain Oro!" At that you felt your heart skip a beat.

Shit, what had he heard?

"What about him?" He asked raising a eyebrow.

"He was arrested!"

"What?!"

"No way!"

"There's no way!" They all were in shock.

"Its true!" He exclaimed.

"I was on my way to deliver some things to Hange-San when I saw him get dragged away by the police! And get this, he was all bloody and bruised! Like he had just been in a fight or something! They were practically carrying him!"

What?! Did Captain Levi...?!?

"Why was he arrested??" Mikasa chimed in.

"I don't know, I asked around but no one seems to know anything.."

"Huh, weird.. I wonder what happend" one of them responded.

One day you would tell them what happened but for now you decided to keep quiet.

Suddenly a flash of raven hair caught your attention. You spotted the captain making his way to Hanges table across the room. When he caught your gaze you couldn't help the small rush of heat and found your lips pulling up into a grateful smile.

He nodded simply and continued on.

Despite everything people said about him, he truly was a good person. And you couldn't help but feel a little giddy at the thought that he beat up Oro because he hurt you.

You still felt the rush of heat at the memories of last night and how he held you. After your cries had quieted down he escorted you to your room and told you to get some sleep.

You thanked him again and that was that. All night all you could think about was- well of course everything that happened- but also, the gentle way Levi tended to your wrists, the way he held your head close, the way he smelled up close the way-

"Hey y/n?" Jean leaned over with an eyebrow quirked.

"Y-yeah?"

"Why are you so red?"

Shit

***************************************************

And that's the end! I hope the ending was everything you guys were hoping for, thank you all for taking the time to read it. I hope Levi didn't seem to ooc. Until next time!

@justanotherlifeff @fangirlingonrhys @haikoo @peculiarinsomniac @charlie-rose-thegay @babyshinso28 @your-daily-dose-of-fangirl @eleventhdoctorsangel @cravrat @hawkssnugget @kimbapkidding1004 @xruna @huffelpuffers @sofflepoffle  @sunisenpai  @kuromihomii @deadcalmlol @smokeychan1216

[heyitsyn]

MANAGER!SEIJOH AU

a/n: this is kind of an au like what if you were

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

anon:

- 🥺👉🏻👈🏻 i would like to request a seijoh!manager reader who’s a first year and is siblings with ushi and the team’s reaction to finding out that she was supposed to go to shiratorizawa with ushi and their reaction with her getting along with the shiratorizawa volleyball team and maybe the manager is a small cute soft little energetic ball of sunshine 🥺🥺 also hewwo, hope youre doing well! ☺️ -🎷🐛

- Ir seijoh manager series is so gooood. Can we get something where by some weird reason yn-chan is close to ushijima and tendou and the seijoh boys dont know about it and how they'd react to her being so affectionate w them ahahwindkdn

EVERYONE SHUT UP AND LOOK AT HOW FREAKING PRETTY TENDOU IS LIKE AKLFDJLASKFJDLSKFJDSFLKD

okayokayokay

so this is a what if thing

like what if ushijima was your older brother

SLKFDJADFLIJSDKLDF I CAN ALREADY IMAGINE OIKAWA SCREAMING

you didnt exactly have the best relationship with your mom

you remember when you were younger that she used to yell at your brother for using his left hand and you got angry a lot because you were fiercely protective of your brother

this caused her to yell at you too for being nosy and being involved in something you shouldnt be in

duh we know that ushi’s dad takashi actually supported him for this and protected him too and you were also a papa’s girl so you always ran to him

he understood you both better and while your mother worked, he was at home taking care of you two

then when they mentioned wanting to separate, you were very sad but somewhat relieved

mostly because you hated hearing your parents arguing and you felt bad for your brother as he constantly did whatever to get you out of the house

thats what brought on your love for volleyball

you werent exactly the best player but you were interested in it and often watched matches with him

but you also liked volleyball because your brother liked it

you liked whatever your brother liked

he adored you too and he was a boy who didnt talk much due to your mother but he was always a talker with you

especially when you couldnt sleep, he would sneak you out of your room and you both would run to the kitchen and eat ice cream

even with just a 2 year age difference, he looked as if he was older than you due to his massive height

‘just wait nii-chan! i will drink enough milk to reach your height!’

*insert lenny face*

AKLDJFSLDKFJDF I HATE MYSELF

CAN I PLEASE DIE

however

when they divorced, you thought your father would take both you and ushi

like the lady at the court even asked you where you wanted to go and not a breath of hesitation you chose your father

you weren’t very concerned because you knew your brother was going to choose your dad as you both were closer to him

so imagine your surprise when he said he didnt care and naturally, the mother would get the child

lowkey you felt hella betrayed and when your dad whisked you away overseas, there was this grudge you held against toshi

yall youre like 5

i would be hella mad too if my brother chose the person who yells at him all the time

in california, your father made sure you still remembered your brother and you tried to detach from the japanese lifestyle to your new one but you just couldnt

maybe around 6 years you were already fed up with the hot california heat and you wanted to go back to japan to see toshi again

you got over that grudge years ago but your mother refused to have any contact or anything to do with your father and so that included you too

she refused to let you both video chat and any type of connection

your dad obviously noticed your sad expressions and your obvious longing to go back to your brother again and so he arranged something

you shut the door gently before taking off your shoes by the doorway

the large house was often quiet except for the constant typing of a keyboard in your father’s study

‘tadaima’

you meekly mumbled but his sense of hearing never wavered so he heard your voice

‘oh? y/n?’

his voice echoed through the hallways and you heard his chair squeak as it was moved back so he could stand

your sock-cladded feet padded against the hard wood floor and you walked towards his study where indeed he was standing there

your father has definitely aged yet his job as a coach made him as fit as he was decades ago

as much as it disgusted you, you could tell what your friends meant when they said your dad was good-looking

they actually said your dad was hot but you refuse to acknowledge that

you and your friends are like 12 tf

you closed the door and sat down on the loveseat at the corner of the room as it was your designated spot

‘hey, papa’

you greeted with a smile and he gave you the same grin

‘i ordered f/f (favorite food) for dinner tonight so try and listen for the bell to ring, okay?’

you nodded

there was bit of small talk and you asked about his team while he asked about school and you both arranged to hang out over the weekend at some ice cream shop

the conversation dragged on until you heard the doorbell and you ran to the door to answer the delivery man

your dad put out the plates on the table and you excitedly dug in

‘also, you remember your grandmother? and her terrible back?’

oh god of course you did

they lived about 30 minutes away from your house in japan and she constantly worried your father bc the woman was approaching 90 and was still picking peppers!

with old coach ukai

‘what did she do now?’

your father chuckled at the exasperation in your voice

‘she misses you. says something about the family’s princess needing to go back to her country or something’

there was a smile in your face

your grandmother was your favorite and she always said you were the princess

she hated your mother because of how insensitive she was so she only acknowledged you as the only other female in the family

obviously your brother was also liked but there was just a special bond between you and your grandmother

‘so when are we going back?’

you asked and it was clear that you were excited at the thought of going back to japan as you havent been back since you moved due to your father’s busy job and your school

takashi swallowed his food before revealing the news

‘actually, if you want, you could finish your schooling there. but only until college first though because your old man needs you over here too’

nah bro you didnt even care about the last part

literally your fork fell to the table and you shrieked 

‘WHAT?! SERIOUSLY?!’

and thus brought you back to japan

you stayed with your grandmother on your dad’s side and you quickly got accustomed back to japan life

OH

your BROTHER!

okay

so waka-chan def heard you coming back

your mother was grumbling about it the other day and he was sure he heard your name in there

‘sdkfjkdslfjdkslfj y/n dkfjlsdkfjldkf’

LMAO THATS ME TRYING TO SAY THAT WAKA COULDNT UNDERSTAND WHAT SHE SAID SINCE SHE WAS MUMBLING SHE WASNT KEYBOARD SMASHING LMAO

there was a mutual giddiness in there too and he was excited to see you again after many years without contact

however

there was a bit of fear in there that thought back to when you were younger and his choice of not really having a specific parent despite your pleads to stay together with him

but he was going to make sure your bond was still intact!

he would do anything in his power to do so!

when you arrived

your dad accompanied you back to japan and you both were walking out to the exit of the airport when you saw your grandmother excitedly waving a sign around

in bold sparkly letters, it said ‘USHIJIMA’

okay wait i love grandma usui 

you quickly ran over to her and she grasped you into her arms

‘nana’

you sobbed and she hugged you tightly

‘im so happy youre back home’

your father shook hands with the friend she brought to help drive you guys back home

old man ukai was basically the chauffeur but hes really good friends with your nana so it was okay

the entire ride you guys basically caught up with each other and you couldnt help but laugh whenever your dad would go on a rant about your grandma being too reckless and your nana defending herself

‘oh stop it, takashi. i was only given one life and if it’s over, it’s over. for now, ill live it how i see fit!’

your old family home was exactly as you remember it but you didnt expect the 6′2 boy in the living room

‘nii-chan’

you meekly whispered and he let out a soft smile before opening his big arms

you ran into them and he held you tightly

‘i missed you. so much’

he whispered and you nodded 

it was def such a nice thing to have your brother again

oooo your dad been knew that you would be sticking to waka like you did when you were itty bitty young

so when you practically begged waka to stay at your nana’s house the entire summer, he couldnt refuse you

duh your mom went to see you but you just quietly sat there and smiled at her

polite but distant

due to being around waka so much, you naturally went to his volleyball practices and their training camp

there

you met his friends and you guys quickly got acquainted especially with tendo bc he was just so fun

and he was your brother’s boyfriend best friend

the others were still kinda distant with you ahem ahem im looking at you shirabu

but they were mostly amazed at how powerful the genetics played in your appearances because wowza you were beautiful

lmao dont let waka hear them say that bc they would be benched all season in a single snap

during training camp, you usually sat at the sides or you would be their stand-in manager

goshiki absolutely LOVES you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GOSHIKI MY SON MY BABY

him and you were the same age so there was an easier way of being friends and your energies just matched so well

he would run up to you whenever he got a play right and you would ruffle his hair affectionately

LADKSJFLDSKFS FLASHBACK TO TENDO!SISTER X GOSHIKI

‘y/n-chan!’

‘y/n-chan!’

‘y/n-chan!’

hell even ushi was getting annoyed at goshiki’s constant need for you

tendo would steal you away and he would be giggling to you about how adorable you were and you just giggled along bc wow this beautiful man is really talking to me right now

ALKSDJFLKSF CAN YOU TELL IM ALSO A TENDOODOO SIMP?

‘cmere, y/n-chan. i taught toshi this the other day and he was very impressed and wanted me to do it again. okay so it goes in a rhyme, ya ready?’

you nodded along and he shot you a close-eyed smile before starting to draw on the dirt with a stick

‘there once was a man with-’

lets just say

you were definitely your brother’s sister

sometimes though

you would try and go towards the calmer players to get away from the rowdiness from baby daddy tendo and baby goshiki

you would find them at the gym just doing drills and at the sight of you, they would turn red but continue playing

they didnt really mind seeing you there bc youve always been such a positive energy and cheered them on which gave them strength

‘NICE ONE OHIRA-SAN!’

‘WAHHH SO COOL YAMAYAMA-SAN!’

you were like a cute ball of serotonin >o<

‘wah, of course its expected for you guys to be the top in the prefecture. youre like,,,,, silent but deadly~!’

duh a compliment from a girl?

dead

shirabu’s bangs would get in the way of his vision sometimes yall i will never stop making fun of that ridiculously adorable haircut so you would use a clip and tuck it away for him

this big babie is so awkward that he turns red when you whisper in his ear that you were done

semisemi baby and you got along bc you guys had a similar taste in music and because you lived in california, he was fascinated that you were in the music capital of america

‘did you see celebrities down the street?’

he asked you excitedly one day during lunch

you stopped then smiled softly

‘semisemi-kun, i didnt live at that part of california’

nah to him, america is just filled with celebrities

OH DEAR BABY BOY KAWANISHI

taichi is a generally quiet guy

like you thought he was actually selectively mute when you first met him

but you gradually got him to talk and you would help him whenever he would want to practice

usually it was during the ungodly hours of the morning

you woke up and went to grab a drink from the common room but you noticed his large build exiting the door so you followed him into the gym

‘kawanishi-san?’

you called out and felt guilty when he jumped 

‘oh, hey’

he aknowledged

‘wha-’

you stopped to yawn causing your eyes to close making you miss the brief second of softness that flashed in his eyes

‘what are you doing?’

you tiredly asked

taichi dusted off his trackpants after kneeling down to rummage through his bag and you couldnt help but gawk at his height

‘im training early’

he answered

‘why? is it because you want to keep up with the others?’

you mumbled and he was surprised for a second but reverted back to his stoic expression

‘i have to make sure i am able to reach my seniors level for next year’

taichi turned away to grab a stray ball and you moved to go to the storage room for the ball cart

‘oi, what are you doing? go back to bed’

he said from the other side of the gym but you just looked back at him with a tired grin

‘meh, i want to spend time with you, senpai’

you reasoned

he shook his head before walking over to you then ruffled your hair

‘no wonder youre so tiny. you dont sleep enough and let your body grow’

yep that was the closest youve gotten to taichi joking with you

usually, hes training and when hes in the zone, nothing else has his attention but the ball

maybe thats why the others ahem goshiki has said that he was very scary

his game face was practically a mean face

basically you spent the entire training camp with them and then soon, you were going back to school

duh everyone hmm maybe not shirabu bc he most definitely read the school book of rules thought you would be going to shiratorizawa with them 

but you broke the news to them one afternoon and imagine the tears from both tendo and goshiki

‘WHHYYYY!!!!’

‘NOOO!!!!!’

‘why can’t you?’

semi asked and you were about to answer when shirabu beat you to it

‘the school doesnt allow late transfers’

oh right

the american school system was set in a different schedule than a japanese school system

it was considered the summer for them yet school already started a few months ago

since shiratorizawa was a very academically and physically prestigious school, they refused anyone who would potentially be late or behind their curriculum

‘so where ya headed to then, chibi?’

tendou pouted and you leaned against his arm

‘hmm some school named aoba johsai? i dont know its near my grannie’s so that’s all that mattered’

oh dear

USHIJIMA NO Y/N WILL NOT ASK TOORU TO GO TO SHIRATORIZAWA

they consider seijoh a rival bc theyve played against them practically in every prefecture tournament and they were worried for that infamous setter

‘ne, y/n-chan, promise us that you won’t be swept away by them! especially a guy named oikawa tooru!’

uhhh

well

tendou’s warning was kinda ignored bc you ended up being seijoh’s manager

hehe

surprise?

but they weren’t really really shocked tho bc they knew you liked volleyball so you would naturally be in the volleyball team

even as a manager

meanwhile in seijohhh

OooOOOoOoOooooo sEiJOOhHHHH~~~~~~

okay so you were actually registered under your father’s last name usui rather than the ushijima last name

therefore you werent exactly immediately known as HEY! USHIJIMA’S SISTER!

you still became the manager the way you did as mentioned in part 1 

and you still are their adorable baby manager

you were aware of their oikawa’s hatred for wakawaka so you try not to talk about him even though youre literally the closest person to him

was it traitorous? 

maybe

but you actually even help them when they practice

duh the boys are like eyebrow raise emoji 

‘wow youre really into volleyball, huh, manager-chan?’

matsukawa commented and you just smiled

‘hmm, my family likes it so ive picked up a thing or two’

LMAO

little do they know your brother is literally the best volleyball player around and is a member of the under 19 team and your father is a volleyball coach in america and would someday be someone iwaizumi hajime (19) would apprentice under

there was a lot of times you thought you would slip up like your home screen was of you and waka but youve been careful to cover it up

BUT

you cant always be sneaky

it was during the first day of the tournament and you were filling up their water bottles I SWEAR WHY IS MANAGER-CHAN ALWAYS FILLING UP WATER BOTTLES when you found a familiar bunch of boys at the end of the hallway just chatting

you havent seen tendou and the boys in so long so you placed the bottles down and rushed over there so quickly

‘TOMUTOMU!’

you shouted and the oddly-haired boy turned and he gasped before grabbing you into a large hug

this grabbed tendou’s attention and he cheered then hugged you too

your giggles and happy cheers were so infectous and they just absolutely missed you so much 

these tall boys were at a advantage so someone scooped you up and you were just affectionately being talked to and hugged and LKDSJFSLDFJ SO LUCKY SO LOVED

meanwhile

the plant babies were wondering where the heck you went to 

‘y/n-chan?! where is she?!’

oikawa panicked quickly while iwaizumi hit him to shut up

‘be quiet! you won’t find her if you’re too busy freaking out!’

‘ill find her’

matsukawa volunteered and they nodded, feeling at ease of him being capable to find you if you were in trouble

but when he returned empty-handed and with large eyes, they knew something was up

they ran behind mattsun to stop and copy his shocked expression at the sight in front of them

is that

you?

with

shi

ra

to

ri

za

wa

oh my god

‘y/n-chan!’

oikawa shouted, being the first to speak

you jumped and your own eyes widened

‘oh. oh no’

you mumbled

the others were so stunned and seijoh itself was so hard to make speechless but they were just shocked

period

‘what is happening’

iwaizumi mumbled

yea the others were just shocked period

‘hey guys’

you waved and you motioned them closer

‘uhh,,, well,,, um they are my friends’

you smiled uneasily and they could see that

���aaand?’

oikawa signalled you to say everything bc he knew it wasnt the whole story

you sighed

‘ushi,,, jima is my brother’

you mumbled the last part

but they heard you

‘HAH?!’

you cringed and the shira boys were about to move to protect you but they saw you glare at them

‘what? what about it? hes my brother? and?’

you babbled

‘but,, why are you,, in seijoh? dont get me wrong! its just,, youd naturally go to shiratorizawa right?’

mattsun waved his hands around and asked the question thats bugging the team

‘i came to the country late’

‘THE COUNTRY?!’

well,,

turns out you havent exactly told them everything about you yet :/

even when youve cleared the air and introduced waka as your brother, seijoh still didnt say anything

they were stuck in this shocked and surprised moment even at the end of the day and when you went straight to the shiratorizawa team,

they watched with wide eyes as you laughed with goshiki and was jumping around with tendou

‘AH! TOMU! MY HAIR!’

‘TORI-SAN! SATORI-SAN! TAKE THAT!’

wow you were actually really beautiful when youre happy

‘i dont think ive seen her this happy with this much energy’

makki said and they nodded

it was true

you were usually calm and collected and was the perfect balance to this chaotic team

so seeing you so free and loose with them was so refreshing, even if it was with damn ushiwaka

you finally went back to the seijoh boys and they all sent glares to the violet team before sending you a smile

‘you ready to go, manager-chan?’

watari ruffled your hair before handing you your bag to start walking to the bus

‘yea. lets go home’

as you all walked, oikawa was already starting his tantrum

‘y/n-chan~! why aren’t you that happy around us? are we not enough for you?’

oikawa whined and pouted

but you just turned to smiled at him and stopped walking to pat his head

‘im not their manager, therefore im not pressured to act like anyone except as a friend and a spectator. but i try to be as professional as i can with you guys to make sure you dont appear bad to others. and you guys are perfectly chaotic enough, adding me into the mix will just about kill coach’

oikawa didnt seem satisfied though

‘but! thats not fair! they get to see you smile and i dont!’

iwaizumi growled at him to be quiet but you beat him to it

well

you smiled at tooru but your eyes shone maliciously

‘i knew you would act like this, oikawa-san. as punishment, i gave nii-chan your phone number. good luck avoiding him now’

oikawa screamed

a/n: AAWWWWW LETS NOT KILL COACH IRIHATA OKAY? HES LIKE OUR GRANPAPA AND PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LEAVE OIKAWA ALONE WAKAWAKA-KUN!

[rosachaotic]

Remember when i said Talbott and Cereza werent over? Yeah.

I promised yall i would write a continuation of this. For those dont remember that happend, here

Anyways enjoy the fanfic!

Warning: none?? Its more just angst then fluff.(but sorry for my bad english and wording im not very good at writing and I wrote this on mobile)

It's been two months and few days since the big argument Talbott and Cereza had on the hospital wings.

This all happened because Cereza tried to do all the investigation and take down R by herself, but of course that plan failed and it backfired on her very badly. She fought the wizard in white and almost died because of it, losing her consciousness after he ran away, fortunately she was found by Moody who was searching for her after her twin brother said she went missing and was taken to the hospital wings.

She was scolded for it of course, and after that her friends went to visit her. All of her friends were worried for her, especially her twin brother Michael who jumped into her hugging her tight, crying, not realizing her whole body was in pain before he quickly let her go.

After a long chat with her friends and twin brother Talbott got in but he didn't look happy, he asked for everyone to leave him and Cereza alone because he wanted to talk to her, everyone left confused to what was going on.

Outside people could hear both Talbott and Cereza arguing with each other, Talbott was disappointed that Cereza lied to everyone including him about not having any information that could be useful for Circle ot Khanna and that she did is by herself he thought she was dead she could have died because of her reckless decision, Cereza tried to explain herself by saying she thought what she was doing was the right because she wanted to protect everyone which didn't make Talbott feel any less worse but the opposite. Both kept arguing with each other until Talbott storms out of hospital wings not looking at his friend's faces who were waiting outside, Penny tried to stop him but he just ignored her and walked away, once everyone back inside to the hospital they saw Cereza holding back her tears but she did a very job at it once everyone was inside and started crying.

----

Cereza rarely saw Talbott after what happened, she only saw him on the classes they shared but even then he didn't even talk to her, she decided to let it be not wanting to bother Talbott and she thought that this was the end of their relationship. This broke her alot, the happy girl that was always smiling and giggling all the time wasn't there anymore, not only she felt bad for what she did but she thought she lost one of the people she loved the most.

That was until Cereza got a letter in the morning, Andre gave it to her and said "It's from Talbott." She quickly opened the letter and read the paper that said:

"We need to talk. Meet me after dinner in the courtyard."

-Talbott

She thanked Andre for the letter who nodded and said "I hope everything works out for you guys." And left, Cereza also hoped that things would work out but she couldn't help but feel anxious about it. What did he want to talk about after dinner? Why did it have to wait?

"Does he want to end our relationship once and for all?" Cereza thought all day, Cereza knew how to be patient but this waiting was killing her.

During dinner she barely ate anything, Rowen(M!Rowan) was trying to make her eat something but she couldn't.

"You have to eat something, you can't sleep with an empty stomach." Said Rowen, worried for his best friend trying to make her eat. He knew about the letter, Cereza told him about it and he knew how nervous and anxious she was because of it.

"I can't, this wait is killing me.'' Cereza said anxiously.

She then looked around, noticing that Talbott wasn't at the ravenclaw table or at any table of the other houses.

"Did you see Talbott walk in?" Asked Cereza, still looking around, Rowen shook his head.

"No, I didn't, I don't think he is coming for dinner today." Rowen took a bite of his food as he said that.

"Why? Do you know about something??"

"No, no, but...Penny said she didn't see all day, he didn't go to any of his classes." Cereza felt her heart drop, this wasn't like him, he would NEVER miss any class, if there was something Talbott was proud of himself is that he was an excellent student.

"This isn't like him…" Whispered Cereza."I cant, i have to go."

"Wha- B-But dinner time isn't over yet!"

"I'm sorry Rowen, but I have to go."

"...Okay, good luck Cere!"

Cereza nodded and left the great hall running, she opened the big door to the corridor and rushed past the students to the courtyard.

As she got outside she looked around.

There he was, sitting on the tree trunk looking at the stars just like he would when he waited for her for their dates.. Cereza sighed with relief knowing that Talbott was okay...or was he?

She took a deep breath and walked toward him, stopping right before him.

"Hey…" Talbott jumped at hearing Cereza's voice, he was probably so lost in his thoughts that he didn't hear her walk in.

"Oh, Sorry I didn't hear you coming in…" Said Talbott awkwardly.

"Its okay…"

"..."

"Penny said she didn't see you all day, you also didn't come for dinner as well."

"I felt sick all day and I wasn't hungry."

"Oh...I'm sorry, I hope you're better now."

Silence took over, the only sound they heard was the cold night wind, making things kinda awkward. Until Talbott coughed and said

"Sit here with me." He tapped right next to him, Cereza then climbed the tree trunk and sat right next to him.

Again, the awkward silence.

Cereza then looked at the sky, it was a pretty starry night, she could see some shooting stars.

" The night is beautiful tonight isn't it?" Asked Talbott, breaking the silence.

"Yeah. It is beautiful."

"It reminds me of when we used to have our dates here, you would make wishes for the shooting stars."

"Stupid wishes, I know." Cereza giggled at her own stupid self.

"I never thought they were stupid." Said Talbott.

"Even the one where I wished for a giant puffskein?"

Cereza shook her head smiling a little bit and she also noticed Talbott was smiling a little as well, she missed seeing him smile, but they weren't there to watch the stars.

"Hey, if that's your wish, who am i to judge?

"Talbott-"

"Yeah?"

"Listen, I-I know you said you wanted to talk to me in your letter, but I want to say something first." Said Cereza nervously, while staring at the floor.

"...Go ahead."

She took a deep breath and then looked at his warm striking hazel, who met her golden eyes. Then she finally said:

"...I'm sorry."

"...Wha-"

"I'm sorry for what I did, Talbott. It was very dumb of me try to all of that on my own and it was and it was insensitive and bad of me not to tell you guys the information I had about R."

"Cereza-"

"I should have trusted you all to defend yourselves without my help, I shouldn't have lied to you guys about not finding anything."

"Cereza listen-"

"I shouldn't have done that, I could have died and i didn't thought about how you, my family and the rest of our friends would feel about it if I died, you were right when you said things wouldn't get any better if I-"

"CEREZA!"

Cereza jumped at Talbott who raised his voice at her, he gripped her shoulders and made her look at him, his eyes staring at her but he didn't look angry he looked sad.

"Just...listen to me please."

Cereza nodded and whispered "sorry" and let him talk.

"Look...after what happened, i couldn't stop thinking about that night on hospital wings. That night kept playing in my head over and over every time I went to bed...I felt awful"

"Huh-"

"I felt awful, Cereza. After I calmed down I realized what I just did and how I shouldn't have talked to you that way, but it was too late, I was already at my dorm and I couldn't bring myself to come back."

"..."

"I was ashamed."

"Is that the reason why you were avoiding me?"

Talbott nodded, he took a deep breath as if was holding himself to not cry.

"I thought you hated me."

"..."

"So I avoided you and everyone else as well, it was painful."

"Tal I-"

"I should have thought of your feelings, how were you feeling that made you do all of that yourself."

"...You had all the rights to react the way you did, it was a stupid and dangerous decision that I made."

"But I still shouldn't have said those things to you."

"..."

"I let my emotions take over me, my heart dropped when I saw Moody carrying you to the hospital wings....blood all over you and you unconscious and i thought i lost you..."

"..."

"When i heard you were alive, I was so happy and relieved...but when i heard about why you did that when I heard Michael talking to Moody I...I dont know what came over me, i was angry and disappointed"

"...I know-"

"Not only on you, but mostly on myself"

"..W-why? Why were you angry at yourself??"

"Because I thought I failed you, I couldn't protect you, I couldn't be there for you."

"But it wasn't your fault-"

"Let me finish..."

"..."

"But that doesn't excuse what I did, i didnt think about what you were feeling, how you were feeling. Your feelings that made you do this and your feelings after it...I called you selfish but I was even more selfish…"

"Tal…"

Cereza's hand went to Talbott's cheek, who jumped at her touch but then rested his face on her hand holding her hand even more close to his face. He closed his eyes while he felt her warmth on his skin again after so long.

"I'm sorry Cereza, I'm sorry for what I did. I'm sorry for everything."

"I forgive you."

Talbott's eyes quickly opened as he looked at her, he was surprised but it also looked like a heavy weight was lifted off his shoulders. She continued:

"But...do you forgive me as well?"

"Of course I do."

Cereza also felt as if a heavy weight was lifted off her shoulders as well, she smiled as she felt tears run down her face and she had to take off her glasses to clean it.

"I-I thought...I thought you called me to end everything between us." Said Cereza as she cried while she tried to clean her tears off her face. She was shaking a little and her breath was also shaky.

"I would never do that." He whispered. "If anything, I was more afraid of you wanting to break up with me."

Talbott got closer to her and hugged tight on to his body, catching her by surprise.

Cereza returned the tight hug, smiling while tears rolled down her face, Talbott also had tears rolling down his face who tried to hide by hiding his face on her shoulder but his shaky breath and the way he sniffed quietly gave it away he was crying. Cereza's hand went to Talbott's hair and was caressing his hair.

"I thought I was going to lose you." Whispered Talbott, not wanting to let her go.

"I thought the same thing…" Cereza whispered back, kissing his head.

Both of them stopped hugging each other as they cleaned their faces but still kept close, Talbott's hand travelled to Cereza's face and caressed her cheek, his hand was cold as always but Cereza never cared about that, she liked his touch.

They both stared at each other, they both knew it was awkward the way they stared at each other but they did not care, their gazes were filled with intense love.

Talbott kept his hand on Cereza's cheek and kissed her other cheek gently but his face didn't move away, in fact he kept face very close to hers moving only a little to her lips, their noses were touching each other and they could feel their heavy breaths, Cereza closed her eyes as she felt her heartbeat go very fast and her face was red, Talbott heart also felt like it was going to jump from his mouth and even his ears were dark red. He brushed his nose on to hers but then kissed her nose, he caressed her cheek once more smiling, Cereza then opened her eyes and saw his smile and smiled back at him. Both of them giving loving smiles at each other.

"I love you." Said Talbott.

Cereza's hand went to Talbott's face and to his cheek as well, as she sighed and smiled again.

"I love you too, meu amor.'

Talbott's smile grew as he heard again the loving way Cereza called him using her first language, while they didn't have their first kiss yet what matters is that they were both together again.

"Just promise to me that you will be more careful." Said Talbott.

Cereza nodded.

"I will...but, do you promise to never leave my side?" Asked Cereza, Talbott chuckled and said:

"I promise, my sunshine."

[niall-hor-man]

i just put in a request for c, n, w, z for harry but i didnt realize there were two lists, so just to be clear those were for lost #1 (if youre even still doing it). but thanks! and sorry for all the trouble

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically…)

H loves to come inside you; it makes him feel much closer to you (even if it’s in a condom)

Really doesn’t mind tasting his own cum; in fact, when you haven’t come yet and he’s finished inside of you, he really likes eating you out and tasting some of it

Loves when you keep it on your tongue after you suck him off and stick it out before you swallow (or spit, he has no preferences)

He hates finishing on your face; it’s basically just him jacking himself off when he gets close just so that he can try not to hit your eye or get it in your hair. It’s too much work and not worth the pay off

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Humiliation kink

Doesn’t like being made to feel jealous; not particularly you into you flirting with other guys unless it’s during a threesome/something he’s involved in

Nothing extremely painful; he doesn’t like to see you hurt, and he doesn’t love pain himself. It’s more so about the power imbalance that comes with it that he likes in milder BDSM

Public sex

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

High sex, because I can’t help myself and that’s my favorite kind of sex

You two didn’t smoke together often; you were more of a drinker yourself, not that you minded weed

It was your best friend’s birthday, and since you had the biggest place out of the group, she asked if she could host a smoke session at your house (Harry was invited, of course)

And who were you to decline a night with your friends? So you happily partook that evening, sharing a joint (or two…) with H, obviously not worried about matching him hit for hit

The night was long, and fun, filled with laughs and junk food, but things were winding down, guests dwindling to just Sammy and your closest friends and their SOs

The last joint of the evening was being passed around when “Landslide” by Fleetwood Mac came on

You immediately abandoned the circle, standing and pulling Sammy up with you; this song was one of your guys’ all time favorites, and you couldn’t stop yourself from pulling her close to you, stupidly swaying to the song with an arm draped around her neck

H watched you as he took a drag from the blunt, but you were completely oblivious, pressed closely to Sammy, giggling and singing to the song as her hands roamed your back and you two spun around lazily

“Can I have a birthday kiss?” She whined, face pressed into the crook of your neck. You giggled and obliged, a hand soft on her face as your mouths slotted together as it had done so many times before

(Harry never minded; he knew it was platonic, and he didn’t quite care that you and Sammy kissed, because you were both in serious relationships and never strayed. You were just a cuddly friend, and he loved that about you)

This time, though, he couldn’t help his arousal; seeing your soft, pliant lips against someone else’s, seeing the way your body swayed to the music–he needed you, and he needed you bad

The kiss was just that, and you two returned to a heap on the floor once the song ended, giggling as the last of the joint was used up. Soon enough, everyone was heading home (Ubering, of course) as more Fleetwood Mac played.

You crawled towards Harry, ready to give him a fat kiss before cleaning up and heading to bed, but he had some other ideas

He pounced on you almost immediately, lips hungry and desperate as he pulled you close to him, making you giggle into his mouth.

“Have no idea how bad I want you right now, kitten.”

“Really?” You smirked, hand trailing down to trace his bulge through his pants. “Then take me right here.”

“Oh, you’re in for it now,” he teased, wrapping his arms around you and rolling you two, laying you back gently. You squealed and giggled, but any amusement was soon lost as he pressed his lips to your neck and grinded down on you

You couldn’t help the moan that escaped as he palmed your breast, finally realizing just how desperate you were for him. Your core was aching, and you couldn’t help but roll your hips up into him

He liked you like this; inhibitions gone and hands traveling up and down his body unapologetically, exploring every inch of him, squeezing his biceps and letting out soft moans into his mouth

“Like that, kitten?” He hummed, rolling his hips down against yours

“Yes,” you panted, pulling his shirt up to palm at his bare back. “Need more, H, please.”

He chuckled, pulling off your clothes as quickly as he could manage before making work on himself. You didn’t wait, palming your breast and bringing your hand to your clit while you watched him undress, moaning already

He loved to see you like this, sensitivity amplified by the weed in your system, inhibitions thrown to the wind, taking whatever you wanted and putting your own pleasure first. His eyes glinted and he replaced your hand with his, rubbing your dripping core as your lips connected.

You moaned into him, arching your back, rutting up, desperate for his cock.

He took the hint, pressing into you slowly, and your legs wrapped around him immediately, needing to feel him deeper. The sex was slow, and deep, and so, so good. (When isn’t high sex good?)

It wasn’t long until you came, with his deep thrusts and circles on your clit, with how sensitive the drug had made you, with how hot Harry looked above you, eyes glazed over and pleasure on his face. He followed soon after, finishing inside you, earning another moan and a long, deep kiss

“We definitely need to do this more often, H.”

(Of course he agreed)

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) 

Harry loves pillow talk, so he tries to stay awake for a bit, to ask about your day and tell you how beautiful you are and how much he loves you

Keyword: tries

Being that close to you, feeling you around him, seeing you in such pleasure brings him such contentment that afterwards he is in such a state of bliss that he could just pass out

He usually does pretty quickly, not that you mind. You are always asleep first after sex, curled up to him and content

[bcdwhcre]

“Sides,” Armin x Reader

We’re gonna act like Annie doesn’t exist. Bear w/ me.

Summary: Being the female titan, you join the scouts to gather information to bring back to Marley but you end up falling for Armin which makes you debate whether or not you should continue to be a spy.

Warnings: end of s3 spoilers mixed with beginning of s4, a lil bit of angst.

Armin x Fem!Reader

.

.

.

The long years of training to become a scout was finally over, during the training corps- you tried to keep your distance away from others except for Reiner and Bertholdt but placing in the top ten and choosing to go forward with being in the scout regiment, it was a lot harder to avoid talking to the others.

Armin was the first and only person to easily come up and talk to you. He liked your strength and how confident you were during training, he always asked for help when it came to combat and at first you would decline and reject his pleas for you to help him.

You weren’t here for friendships, you were here to gather information. But time went on, the more Armin came up to you, the more you softened up. He was always sweet and gentle with you, always complimenting you and talking about how great you were at being a scout.

He was always making sure you were okay, mentally and physically. He was always by your side, being a good friend but deep down he already had feelings for you, he had them since the training corps.

When it came to him, all he ever thought about was Eren and Mikasa but when he seen you, it was kinda like love at first sight until he seen you in action. You were very intelligent, strong, selfless and brave. It was the reason why he liked you so much.

One day it had hit you, the feelings and realization, you were slowly falling in love with Armin the more you hung out with him, the more you worked with him and it was driving you crazy.

The days he would come up to you, giving you a simple cup of coffee or when out in the field he would be in complete awe of the way you were so good at the ODM gear and easily slaughtered the Titans without hesitation. He admired you.

You even tried to convinced Reiner and Bertholdt to go back to Marley early because you felt yourself slowly slipping and giving into Armin. You wanted to go back home and prevent you messing up the mission. You told them to leave and give the information you already have but they refused and it made you think about a lot.

Then Armin started to sit in your room most nights, ranting about beautiful things and ideas he had in that big brain of his. He even opened up about seeing the ocean to you, shocking the both of you because he only ever told Eren and Mikasa.

“I don’t mean to ramble, I know I do it a lot.” He admitted, his cheeks turning a light shade of red and you shook your head.

“No, I enjoy listening to you.” The way his eyes lit up when he turned to look at you, his heart pounding inside his chest.

Armin was never much of a bold person, he was shy and emotional and people seen him as weak for it but when you looked at him, it had given him that boost of confidence to lean over and press his lips on yours.

It had caught both of you off guard, he wasn’t expecting you to kiss him back and you weren’t expecting a kiss from him at all. It was only a small gentle kiss but it made your heart flutter, feeling as if it was going to explode out of your chest.

He gave you a small smile, standing up from your bed and grabbing the book he had brought to show you and you watched him walk to the door, he was completely flustered.

“I’ll talk to you tomorrow, I hope you sleep well.” He turns towards you, waving bye and walked out of your room to leave you with your thoughts.

The way your parents at home would be completely disappointed in you, everyone at home would be disappointed in you but hanging around Armin more made your eyes open up and shine light on why they hated the Titans and you understood.

You had become one of them and you hated to admit that but you’ve never met someone like Armin, he was different and beautiful in so many ways. You were willing to risk your home for him.

The day had came to where you had to use your titan form, not wanting to but Reiner had threatened you otherwise and it just made you feel guilty. You felt like you were betraying Armin and it made your heart break piece by piece.

You glanced over at them, sighing under your breath and leaped off the wall, your body transforming into the large female titan. You hated this with every fiber in your being but you just ran off to get the job done and return back with no questions asked.

Once the plan was done, the job that Reiner couldve simply done but forced you to do, you had heard the scouts from afar and quickly ran to hide to get out of the giant body you were hiding in.

You broke out of the tough skin, gasping for air and seeing the steam around you as you quickly got out and landed on the hard ground, your eyes moved up and suddenly they met with a pair of blue ones.

“Y/N?” Armin’s voice cracked, his heart squeezing in his chest at the sight of you, he had seen everything and the stripes under your eyes proven to be true.

“Armin, wait.” You had reached out for him but he flinched back, his eyes wide and filling up with tears.

“You’re the... you’re the female titan, you were a titan this whole time.” He shook his head, in disbelief and the memories of you two that flooded his head convinced him they were all fake.

All the nights he stayed in your bed, rambling about anything and the way he would cuddle you, kiss parts of your body and always leaving your lips for last because that was his favorite spot.

He assumed they were all fake. You were an imposter.

“Let me explain, please.” You had tried to plead with him, your hands trying to grab onto his but he continued to back away from you, terrified.

“Explain what? I just saw you! You’re a titan!” He yelled at you, making you freeze in your spot and you accepted defeat at that point.

You never wanted to hurt Armin or lie to him and the way the tears streamed down his face, it made your heart hurt and it made you drop to your knees- running away would just make you look more like a criminal to Armin and that’s the last thing you wanted to do.

You heard the scouts from afar coming closer, your sad eyes staring into his and you moved your head to look down at the ground.

“I never wanted to lie to you, Armin. I love you more than anything.. even enough to get myself arrested right now. I don’t want to lose you, everything... everything we shared was fucking real to me. Just please let me explain everything.” You were in tears, not caring about your family or your home, you were willing to give it all up for him.

He stared at you, stunned with his eyes wide and he finally took a step forward towards you. The hurt in your eyes made him soften up, making him drop to his knees in front of you and you lifted your head up to look at him.

“Why?” He whispered towards you, he was confused, beyond confused. He never expected this out of you, he loved you too much to believe you could be capable of this

“I knew I would get taken and tortured if I revealed that I’m a titan shifter. Look what they did to Eren, they almost killed him.” You rushed out, making him stare at you and he hated how easily he gave into you.

He embraced you in a tight hug, catching you by surprise as you felt his hair tickling the side of your face and you hesitated before wrapping your arms around him, burying your face into his shoulder.

“I won’t let them hurt you. You just have to be honest, tell them the truth.”

Your heart broke more if that was even possible. You didnt want to lie to him but you couldn’t bring up Marley, you couldn’t bring up Reiner or Bertholdt. You had to come up with some other plan, to please the scouts.

“Okay.” You gave in, your hands clinging onto the back of his jacket, afraid of letting him go or getting ripped away from him.

He had pulled back, cupping your cheeks and brushed his thumb over the markings that were slowly fading away and he sighed under his breath.

His heart aches for you, he wouldn’t be able to handle losing you. Not one bit. As the scouts dropped to the ground around you, aiming their swords at your head, Armin had stood up and guarded you.

“She’s not a threat! Put the blades away, please!” He shouted, making Levi grunt under his breath and walk over to the both of you.

Levi had looked down at you with disgust, his blade tilting your head up straight to meet his gaze and he gave you a cold stare.

“I expect you to come with us willingly and not put up a fight, if you do- I won’t hesitate to put you down for good.” He ordered you, making you nod your head slowly and you stood up.

Armin had stayed beside you, making the Captain give him a dirty look as well but he always trusted Armin’s instinct but hated his big heart in wanting to believe everything he hears.

Levi had stayed in front of you, leading the way back to the main base and Erwin had joined as all four of you sat inside his office. They asked Armin to leave but he rejected, wanting to stay put and be beside you- to make sure they wouldn’t do anything.

“I want everything out on the table.” Erwin ordered you, making a lump form in your throat and you made up some story about how you became a titan and why you kept it from them.

They had somewhat believed it, especially when you gave evidence of always being a good scout and never betraying them one bit but they continued to watch you like a hawk.

When you finally had some alone time, Reiner shoved you towards the woods with Bertholdt following closely behind to make sure no one was watching or coming but it was the middle of the night anyways, everyone was asleep.

“What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you trying to get us killed?” Reiner shouted at you, wanting to completely punch you in the face but held himself back.

“I didn’t mean for it to turn out like this!”

“Like what? You falling for these fucking murderers?! Is that it? Do I need to take you back to Marley and have you killed?” He pointed his finger towards you and you shook your head repeatedly.

“You better watch yourself or else Armin is dead, you hear me? Don’t blow this.” He threatened you, making your blood boil at the sound of Armin’s name being brought up.

That’s when you had enough, you were tired of it all. The mission, the secrets, everything. You raised your fist, punching Reiner straight in the jaw and it had made him stumble back in shock.

“I don’t give a shit about this mission but if you touch Armin, I swear you two would be dead in an instant. Remember your place.” You said, making him stare at you with such anger, he was convinced he would shift and fight you right in the woods but Bertholdt grabbed a hold of him.

“Not here, please, we’re supposed to be a team.”

“A team?! Marley raised us on how these people are murderers and terrible human beings and yet.. all they do is protect lives from titans. Fuck that bullshit, Marley is full of fucking liars and cowards!” You screamed at the both of them, not hesitating to hold any of your emotions back.

“You’re the coward and a traitor, once this is over with and we collect Eren- you and Armin are getting killed next.” Reiner scoffed, storming away and Bertholdt had stared at you before following his friend.

You were angry, all the thoughts rushing to your head and you wanted to kill them. You didn’t even care about the stupid mission anymore, it’s not like you were ever wanted on that stupid island anyways.

You got lucky that you got handed down the female titan. The only reason you did is because your dad had paid them heavy amounts of money just so he can finally be proud of you. Your family couldn’t care less about you, they only wanted you to do this because your older brother had risked his life for Marley and died in battle- they expected you to do the same.

Other than that, they pretty much hated you. You were convinced they did this to you so you can leave and not be around anymore.

Your eyes filled up with tears, of sadness and anger to the point where you stomped your way back inside the base and went straight for Armin’s room, seeing him asleep on the bed. You softened up, wiping the tears from your face and you sat on the floor beside his bed.

You didn’t want to wake him, he looked too peaceful. So you just stayed put, your fingers lightly brushing through his hair and you sighed quietly. You were so in love with him that it really messed with your head. You had no thoughts anymore, just Armin.

And you promised yourself to protect him with everything you had. Nothing was worth it anymore, you just wanted him.

-

Time had passed by, a lot of time. After getting Eren back from the two titan shifters, the scouts were settled on reclaiming wall Maria and also trying to hunt down Reiner and Bertholdt.

You were on your horse, rushing towards the wall and you had moved your head to glance back at Armin, seeing the happy smile he gave you and you couldn’t help but smile at him.

That is until everyone had made it to the wall, Reiner getting caught and not hesitating to shift and try to kill everyone. He was going crazy and from afar, the Beast Titan- the one person you haven’t seen in ages, since before you left Marley.

Your heart had pounded in your chest, you had a awful feeling. Maybe it’s because you technically were the traitor, you were siding with the Scouts but you didn’t regret doing that.

Levi had instructed you to hold your Titan form back unless it was absolutely needed because he believed Eren was fully capable of doing most of the work. But that was until Bertholdt had shown up, shifting when he saw how beaten Reiner was- convinced he was dead, it sent him into a rage.

Even then, Levi had made you hold back.

So you did.

Then when you went back over the wall after helping with Levi, both Titan shifters were down and you could hear screaming in the distance. You leaped off the wall, using the ODM gear to help you land on the floor and you saw Eren hovering over a body.

“Eren?” You were quiet but his head snapped towards you, complete pain written across his face as tears were uncontrollably streaming down.

“I’m sorry.” He said, making your eyes look down at the body and suddenly your knees had grown weak.

It was barely unrecognizable but you could tell who it was, your body giving out on you as you drop to your knees and practically crawled over to him. Your hands shaky and you wanted to grab onto him but you hesitated, the way his body was completely burnt- you couldn’t grab him.

It had taken a moment to hit you, the realization and a painful scream had left your lips knowing Reiner and Bertholdt had done what they said they were going to do- kill him.

Your heart felt empty, that’s the only way to put it. Empty. Shattered. You felt hollow.

Your screams and sobs were painful to Eren’s ears but he tried his best to somewhat comfort you. Making the others drop down on the roof and Levi had shortly came afterwards, the Titan serum being brought up but also Erwin as both of them barely were breathing.

Eren was quick to argue, threatening to fight Levi if needed for Armin to get it and Mikasa had done the same. You didn’t want to fight but you would lay your life down on the line for Armin.

“It goes to him.” You barely said over a whisper, staring down at his body and everyone had looked over at you.

“You’re telling me to pick a kid over the commander? Are you guys idiots?” Levi grunted, making your eyes shoot over at him and you stood up.

“If you would’ve simply ordered me to use my Titan form and help, Armin wouldn’t be like this right now! This is on you and you only and if I have to, I will fully use force to give him that fucking serum.” You threatened him and his eyebrows raised in amusement.

“Remember your place, cadet or else I’ll put you in it.”

The anger had bubbled up inside of you, making you rise to your feet and before you could even walk up to Levi, you were grabbed by Jean who was already injured enough from the events that occurred.

“It’s not worth it.” He mumbled, looking down at you with sad eyes, he wanted Armin to live just as much but he knew he didn’t have a say in the matter.

“It’s not worth it? Armin deserves that serum more than anyone here. Let’s not forget who even saved our asses half the time, it was him.” You practically shouted at all of them and Levi finally had enough.

He forced everyone to go away so he can decide on his own. Plus most them being injured, everyone needed to back away. But you didn’t want to go without a fight, Eren had to pull you away and take you off the building.

You didn’t want to leave Armin, you didn’t want him to die or even die alone. It made the tears slip from your eyes again, the pain you felt in your chest, it was your fault he was like this. You couldn’t help but blame yourself for everything.

But once you saw the Titan shift and eat Bertholdt, your feet managed to run over to where it was, Eren trying to grab back onto you but it was too late. You had went on the roof, watching the Titan stare at you before collapsing- the steam covering the body and you could see Armin’s body rip out of the skin.

Your heart stopped, almsot tripping over your feet as you climbed over the body and grabbed onto Armin, more sobs leaving your lips, not being able to have control over your emotions. You clinged onto him, holding his body to your chest and laid your head on top of his.

Everything was such a blur but seeing Armin just made everything clear again.

It had taken him hours to wake up, making you grow impatient as you sat on the wall beside his body and glanced around at the empty town. The victory of reclaiming wall Maria didn’t excite anyone, maybe it was because of the amount of lives lost.

Armin had woken up, his head pounding and confused as to how he was still alive until his eyes laid on you, seeing the back of your head as you stared out at the sky, hearing the breeze.

“Y/N.” He mumbled, his hand reaching out to place on your back and your eyes moved down to him.

You didn’t want to cry again but you were feeling overly emotional, his blue eyes staring up into yours and suddenly you tackled him in a hug. Almost making you both fall over but he grabbed onto you, burying his face into your shoulder.

“I thought I lost you.” You admitted, pain in your voice and as he remembered the events that happened, how he put his life on the line- he felt guilty for making you worry.

“I’m sorry but I’m here, I’m alive.” He pulled back, his soft hands reaching up to grab your cheeks and your heart finally felt full.

“I love you, I really do.” You barely said over a whisper, the butterflies swarming in your stomach and he brushed strands of your hair back from your face.

“Trust me, I love you more.” He sighed happily, seeing your face again made him realize just how precious you were to him.

He gently peppered kisses on your face, like he always did. He would always plant them all over, taking his time and always leaving your lips for last because that was his favorite spot.

Once he was done with your face, his fingers tangled in your hair and glanced down at your lips then back up to your eyes, the cute little grin on his face as he finally molded your lips together and kept it slow yet soft.

After that, you had told Armin everything. From Marley to everything and why you came to the island. He understood, he wasn’t mad at you because you never showed signs of betrayal. He knew that and he fully trusted you.

You knew everyone back home would be angry, wanting you dead but as his bright blue eyes stared at you with such love and hope, it was worth betraying your home for him. He was the only person that cared about your well being and loved you completely.

Armin was all you needed. Nothing else mattered.

.

.

.

Pls😭😭

• Main Masterlist •

• AOT Masterlist •

[yardsards]

some little post book 2 headcanons i have that i *would* put into fic form if i didnt kinda hate writing: (putting it under a readmore bc it's a lot of text)

-of course, soon after getting off the train, jesse and lake have to explain the whole train thing to jesse's parents. they're shocked but have no choice but to believe him because there's an entire metal person right there

-they have to call law enforcement and be like "hey our son's back, you can close the missing person's case." lake hides when they come over to question jesse and his parents about what happened (bc cop-related trauma. honestly jesse's pretty nervous too). jesse just says he ran away and hitched a train and the investigators just. immediately Understand. apparently the train is a well-known phenomenon in that field

-lake stays with the cosays for a while. jesse and nate share a bedroom room and have bunk beds so lake sleeps on a cot next to jesse's bunk and it's really crowded but they all make it work.

-it's all just very hectic for the whole family while everyone settles down from the train stuff and the "our son/brother went missing" stuff. lots of hugs and crying and whatnot. it takes a few weeks before jesse is ready to go back to school.

-there ARE support groups for train survivors and their families. both newer passengers and passengers that had gotten off decades ago and have long-since adjusted to post-train life are there. a lot of the general public looks at those groups the same way you'd look at a support group for victims of alien abductions but the groups are legit. they're a little for emotional support but also good for like. connecting you to therapists that know about the train. or getting your life back together after going missing for a long time. or getting in touch with some secret train-related government bureau to iron out any other issues. etc.

-the cosays+lake get in touch w one of said groups. the members are all a bit shocked about a denizen getting off the train but are generally willing to do what they can to help lake adjust to being out in the real world and handle any legal troubles

-lake needs a month or two to calm down after all the train trauma before they can really think about what they wanna do with their life. but eventually they decide they do wanna try to go to school and have a somewhat normal life. and then the group starts getting in touch w the right organizations to get them legally recognized as a person and whatnot

-lake is about a year younger than jesse but. they choose their birth date to be the day they escaped the train, rather than tulip's birthday. and they fudge the year so that when they DO go to school they'll be in the same grade as jesse. they figure they'll already be pretty behind, learning all the information they missed while stuck in a mirror, only getting bits and pieces of tulip's classes, so what's one more year's worth of class to catch up on?

-lake ignores jesse's suggestion to make their last name be "dracula" but DOES decide to make it "alan" in honor of their dear deer friend

-they're given the choice of it they wanna stay with the cosay family or get adopted by someone else. they're kinda on the fence about it. because on one hand they wanna stay with jesse and his parents and brother are really nice. but on the other hand, they kinda wanna have their own family instead of relying on jesse for all of their connections- and although the cosay parents have done their best to hide it and would absolutely never make lake feel unwelcome and are fully willing to adopt them if need-be, lake can kinda tell having a third child unexpectedly added to their lives has been rough on them.

-in the end, they decide to meet a few potential families (mostly either former passengers, or friends/family of former passengers) and see if any of them are good fits, and if none of them are, they'll stay with the cosays.

-it takes a couple different tries. some families just don't seem like the right fit. some parents change their mind soon after, realizing they're not prepared to raise a traumatized teen. some live too far away and lake doesn't wanna be completely separated from jesse. it's pretty stressful and disheartening for lake, because the venn diagram overlap of "people who understand train stuff" and "people currently looking to adopt a teenager" is pretty small and they've already burned through a lot of their options. they're about to throw in the towel and decide to stay with the cosays but...

-the final parents they meet end up being a PERFECT match. they're an older couple with no children, a former passenger and her wife. (i have headcanons about these two bit that'll be added in a reblog bc this is already so long). their personalities and interests mesh really well with lake's. they're mentally and financially equipped to take in a new kid who needs extra support AND they live only a ~25 minute walk from jesse's family

-they do take a while more to really get to know each other and to get lake adjusted to their house because just immediately shoving a traumatized teenager into a new house with people they don't know very well would obviously be a recipe for disaster

-still though, jesse and lake end up at each other's houses a vast majority of the time and sleepovers are pretty common. their parents have accepted this

-it takes around a year of homeschooling from their moms and some professional tutors until lake is ready to go to real school. i once saw the hc that on top of missing a lot of class, they're also used to reading and writing backwards, which i think is neat. so yeah, it's pretty difficult but they're determined and have people dedicated to helping them learn

-during this time, their moms and jesse and his family help them explore different interests and just overall get used to living in the prime world. of course, the people in town see a metal person walking around and are pretty shocked and confused and some react poorly but. lake at least always has their best friend or their family there to support them through that

-by the time they're ready to attend school, the locals have mostly become desensitized to their presence. nonetheless, kids can be cruel sometimes. but they're good at handling it and have plenty of support. they even end up making some new friends at school.

[nikrangdan]

cafeworker!ni-ki

pairing: cafeworker!ni-ki x female reader

genre: fluff, comedy

description: the cashier at the new coffee shop was so adorable you just couldn’t resist visiting just for him

**did not proofread

————

contrary to popular belief, you were NOT a social person

whenever you were around friends and family, you were always the loudest person there

like SHUT UP Y/N!!!!!!

anyways although you were loud, people still enjoyed being around you because you had such a sweet soul and interesting humor

everyone close to you knew that you hated talking to people you didnt know

but to all the strangers? no

they would think you were an outgoing ready-to-meet-new-people extrovert

which was so, so wrong

but ALAS, you had to talk strangers almost everyday living in 2020

(well lets pretend we arent in the middle of a pandemic right now)

moving on......

so you were in high school at the downfall of your existence

you used to have so many friends when you were younger ..now you only have like 3

and those three were always busy (busy making up excuses thats for sure) so you never really hung out with them outside of school

and on one fine evening after school you decided to visit the new cafe 5 minutes from your house

u were really excited because all the cafes were 15 minutes from your house so now u could just walk to this one if u wanted to !!!

but yeah it was in the middle of a small plaza that had cute buildings

you pulled up to the parking lot and was just about to get out the car when u remembered..

u have to talk to the cashier :/

who’s a stranger! even more ://

it was always so weird to you.. whenever you went out you always had someone else order for you because you just hated talking to strangers

you just felt uncomfortable and you couldnt help it

its not like you have never ordered for yourself but you would always prefer not to

and now that you think about it

this is the first time you have gone out by yourself

you did text one of your friends beforehand but they said they “had homework to do”

LIES!!!!

but you really wanted to try the coffee so you just ran with it

time to face your fears!

you opened the glass door to reveal a cute looking cafe, like the ones you’d see in movies

you loved it already

glancing to the cashier you’d have to be talking to—

hold on

you had to do a double take because WOAH.....

the cashier...

he....

wow..

you have never seen a boy like that in your life

you stood there for like 3 seconds before coming to your senses and standing infront of the menu

that was infrONT OF HIM

“hi, what can i get for you?”

HIS VOICE OH MY GOD..!?!?!

“oh um.. can i get a second to .. look..?”

“yeah of course,” he gestured to the menu on the wall above him

hes so nice u almost cried

your eyes shakily traveled up to the chalkboard menu and u began to ‘read’ the options

its like u could feel his eyes on u WTF!!!!

um um um *internally keyboard smashes*

you couldnt even think

the words on the menu were like gibberish

the ONE time u go out by yourself

this had to happen.. of course! someone had it out for you, you were sure of it >:(

picking a random drink you gave him your order

“uh can i have an iced caramel macchiato?”

ITS LIKE YOU CANT SAY A SENTENCE WITHOUT UH OR UM

u cant help but think hes judging you

he looks like that while u are standing there in old sweatpants your dads tshirt

“sure, what size?” he looks into your eyes after putting your order into the machine

god you felt your heart stop

his Eyes..... theyre so beautiful

“oh um regular” you attempted to give a small smile

hopefully it looked like one

“okay that’ll be $5.12.”

you dug out some cash from your bag and handed it to him

he gave u your change and gave u a small smile

“your drink will be out in a minute”

AAAAA

he went :)

he is so CUTE.....?!?!

he looked around your age too

sigh... you knew he was way out of your league though

you were gushing over him but he probably thought you were just another boring customer

while waiting u sat at one of the 2 person tables on your phone

and u IMMEDIATELY went to text your groupchat

‘GUYS’

‘AT THE CAFE NEAR MY HOUSE’

‘CUTEST BOY IVE EVER SEEN EVER IN MY ENTIRE LIFE’

‘WTF IM GONNA CRY HOW DOES HE EXIST’

‘WAIT BRB HE S COMIBBG’

you tried to quickly put your phone down without looking suspicious when you saw him walking towards you with a drink in his hand

“here you go, enjoy” he said before swiftly making his way back to the counter and talking to the other worker there

wow... hes so mesmerizing

you’d steal glances at him every now and then while taking sips of your drink

you were sitting there for like 20 minutes before you noticed you finished your drink

you totally forgot you came here to see how good their coffee was

it was good by the way

sadly it was your time to leave

taking one last glance at him, you threw away your empty cup and walked out the door

wow

u cant believe you got to witness the most beautiful human being ever

in your small town?? crazy

you were sitting in your car just thinking

WAIT

U DIDNT EVEN KNOW HIS NAME!

you mentally punched yourself but then you started laughing

what does knowing his name even matter, its not like u were ever going to talk to him anyway

LOL

*sad emoji*

but the coffee was good so you definitely planned to go back

and not just because of the cute boy

...unless....

*time skip*

the next day you went there was a week later at the same time in hopes that he was working the same shift

AND HE WAS!!!!

score! 1 for y/n, 0 for umm... any other person who had a crush on him too i guess

the cafe didnt have too many people since it was fairly new and also in a small part of the city

so when you went in, you were the only one there along with the two workers

“welcome, what would you like to order?”

NOT THIS AGAIN

he looked even cuter today

his messy blond hair almost covered his eyes

you shouldve forced your friend to come with you this time

you ordered the same thing as last time but this time he asked for your name

hmmm

“um y/n” you answered

your heart was always beating 2 times as fast whenever you had to talk to him

he wrote it down on the cup and after you paid, you went to sit down at the same spot as last time

looking at him is literally the highlight of your day

the same thing happened as last time, he came over and gave you your drink without giving u a second glance

>:((((

boooo look at me cute boy

nonetheless u continued going to the cafe at the same time as much as u could which was like three times a week

literally over a month later and u dont think anythings going to happen

u punch yourself for thinking the boy would somehow find interest in you

hes still indifferent to you which isn’t surprising since you’ve never made any kind of move

ever

but

he should know u by now

hopefully..

*time skip again*

it was a saturday

at this point you’ve basically given up on having a crush on him and now since its become a routine u just say you go for the coffee

not really paying attention to your surroundings you dont notice that the boy at the cash register isnt the normal one you see almost everyday

“hey, what would you like to order?”

woah WHAT

you look up from your bag to notice a boy that was definitely not the one that normally stood infront of it at this time

and you also noticed something on this new cashier

a name tag

how come your old little crush didnt have one????

this new boys name was ‘jay’ and he was fairly cute too

looking around the corner at the other worker u noticed he has a name tag too

you recognized him because he was always working when the cute boy was at the cash register

his name was ‘heeseung’

after taking in these new additions you answered to jay

“oh um.. can i ge-,”

“she gets an iced caramel macchiato. her name is y/n”

??!<_|#%[>~€\£~

you whipped your head around so fast to see who said that behind you

was it who you thought it was ??!??!

YES IT WAS!!!!

OH MYGOD

ITS HIM

you widened your eyes at the boy who wasnt wearing his normal black and white uniform

instead he was wearing black ripped jeans and a gray hoodie

wow....... and u thought he couldnt look any better

BUT OMG?? HE REMEMBERS U

“oh wow ni-ki, you know her?” the boy named jay asked him

“uh yeah.. shes a regular” he said before walking to stand next to you

NI-KI

HIS NAME IS NI-KI OHMHGOD

u thought his name fit him perfectly its so CUTE

“are you gonna get something too?”

this whole time you were silent because.. what is going on

your heart was being SO fast you thought that everyone could hear it

“yup, can i get the same thing? also im paying for both of us”

WHAT??/):)/$;##\%|

ur eyes widened even more it looked like they were gonna pop out of its sockets

u unconsciously leaned towards the boy next you and kind of put your hands up

“w-what?? oh um no, you dont have to do that” you nervously said to him as he looked down at you

he kind of had a smile on his face

“i want to.”

there is no way this is happening

“oiiii ni-ki” jay chuckled while punching in numbers on the cash register

“ill have both of your drinks out soon, you two kids have fun!” jay said before turning around to face heeseung

WHAT??!!??!

your jaw almost dropped from shock

millions of thoughts ran through your brain and you couldnt even process anything

u cant believe this was happening

it was like a wattpad story or something.. is this how u meet ur soulmate

your thoughts were interrupted by a hand on your back momentarily and u look to see ni-ki shyly grinning and gesturing u towards a table

no way...

you awkwardly follow him to a 2 person table next to wall and sit down

you literally could not hear anything except for the pounding of your heart

“uh sorry about that...” he rubbed his neck and sheepishly smiled

“im ni-ki by the way”

“y/n...” u felt so awkward u wanted to cry

“agh, im really sorry if that was weird.. i just didnt know how to ask you out.....” he trailed off

*passes out*

IM JOKING

Ok but u felt ur heart stop bc NO WAY

“wait what??” u ask, ur eyes bigger than the moon

“um yeah... haha i took the day off today to try to talk to you.. sorry if that was weird..”

HE WAS SO AWKWARD JUST LIKE YOU IT WAS THE CUTEST THING EVER

“no its okay!! im glad actually...”

“really? so is it okay if we hang out?” he asked excitedly

u did not think u could handle HOW CUTE THIS BOY WAS O M G...

“of course! sorry if im kind of awkward though” you gave a small smile

“its okay, i think i am too”

you two began talking about the cafe and where you went to school

turns out even though you two lived in the same town (literally 5 minutes away from eachother) u went to different schools for some reason

u talked for like 2 minutes before jay walked up with your drinks

“hows it going guys?”

“its doing good bro, now go away..” ni-ki lightly shoved jay and laughed

you giggled at the sight

jay looked offended and came right back

“that is not how you talk to your elders ni-ki! y/n do you see this?!” he scoffed

ni-ki just rolled his eyes and turned back to you

“do not ignore me young man!” jay joked

“oh y/n, ive heard all about you from ni-ki over here by the way.”

ni-ki’s eyes got so big you almost got worried

he turned around so fast and gave jay one of those ‘i swear if you say anything ur dead meat’ looks

jay obviously did not care

“hes always like ‘y/n this y/n that’ blah blah im glad he finally got the balls to ask you out because im honestly sick of hearing it!” jay laughed

u were blushing so hard

NI-KI LIKED U????

this felt like a dream

ni-ki pushed jay away so hard and turned back with red cheeks

awe

but yeah that was the beginning of the cutest relationship ever

u and ni-ki were so cute together <333

you’d always visit him during ur free time

it took like 2 months before u two made it official tho

and he was the sweetest boyfriend ever

[solarsleepless]

Please tell me everything you know about c!niki xD

THIS IS GONNA BE HELLA LONG SO HERE YOU GO

so niki first joined l'manberg - contrary to popular belief - AFTER the revolution, along w jack manifold. she joined bc she was good friends with wilbur and tommy. she opened up a bakery after consulting her diary/chat, and it ended up being pretty successful. not too succesful, but successful. during the elections, she decided to support her friend (childhood friend? the timeline is fucked up bc of c!fundy existing lbr) and together she and fundy made COCONUT2020. she didn't think she'd win, only really did it for fun, and supported wilbur even though she didn't join his party then her best friend and friend got exiled, and so she was understandably distraught and angry schlatt's reign was one of her low points. not her lowest, but pretty damn low if i do say so myself. she was tormented during this time by schlatt himself, and he made fun of her for her relationship with wilbur, called her things like a "wrench", he taxed her (to the point where she had to run away!), and he imprisoned her. it doesn't help that her childhood(?) friend betrayed her burnt down the flag that she had made for l'manberg (its so sad actually, listen to it) she had a birthday party that while i didnt watch ive heard that wilbur threatened to blow up l'manberg so yeah then she saw her younger brother-like figure get executed onstage, then almost got executed herself, when wilbur managed to get her away then it is DEVASTATING as she finally finds out abt how things have been going in pogtopia (especially for the viewers who only watched niki's pov). she had thought that they had a plan, that they were working things out, when really they haven't even got a semblance of a plan the pit fight happens, and then after she goes up to listen to one of tommy's discs with tubbo and tommy themselves during the manberg v pogtopia war, she fights for pogtopia and watches schlatt die and the nation become wilbur's again. then, of course, comes the part that all old school c!niki fans will remember... during the celebration they had just after tubbo gained presidency, she accidentally uncovered a small part of the wall and saw tnt. she went still, then covered it up, on the assumption that wilbur wouldn't blow it up BOY was she wrong her home gets destroyed (watch this and skip forwards until niki's pov), and she doesnt find out that wilbur dies until much, much later. to honour him, she starts wearing his coat. everything goes fine for a little while, and she yknow dates puffy (*SOBS* im unbiased im unbiased.... *sob*), and then doesnt find out abt tommy's exile until much later AFTER that. she doesnt really get in on the lore much during the inbetween period of tommy's exile and doomsday except for her city being built more. then, during doomsday, she gets angry at tommy and says that he couldn't just walk in there and assume everyone would be on his side, she also shouts at ranboo abt sides and stuff. later, she apologizes to ranboo and says that if ranboo fights for l'manberg, she will too. ranboo ends up doing nothing except watching everything unfold, and so niki does the same, except for one thing. she burns down the l'mantree, also known as her canonical lowest point. after that, she hears ghostbur speaking and has a panic attack, trying to reassure herself that "he's gone, he's gone, he's gone" and because shes too flooded w memories, she ends up blowing up her bakery. afterwards, however, she goes down into her secret city and isolates herself from everybody except for jack, who she plots to kill tommy with. she takes tommy to a nuclear test site and almost manages to kill him, but JUST misses him, somehow after this attempt, she scurries back to her little hole like a cryptid and (this is, in my opinion, her lowest point) isolates herself even MORE. she has contact with exactly 1 person during this whole period of four-five canonical(??) months, and it results in her mental health getting worse. technoblade visits her at the start of this, offering her a position as an anarchist to which she gives him a "maybe, after

i kill tommy" she gets night terrors, and keeps herself in a literal CELL so that she doesnt go anywhere when she sleepwalks, also punches the walls whenever she wakes up from a nightmare, which is often. eventually tho, she accepts techno's offer and joins the syndicate, naming herself as nemesis as a reference to her past self she manages to heal a substantial amount, finally having: a) a group that lets her speak (which is SO important for her, its actually the key to her entire arc) and b) socialization! however this takes a big turn, when she hears that wilbur's back she tries to play it off, then goes the l'manhole or l'crater, reminisces about wilbur betraying her (may i note the rocketduo where she looks pointedly at manifoldland and says "and GOD you deserved so much better dgsayufasyufgasuy) she grabs wilbur's diamonds, some of the first ever items she got in the SMP, then hides them in the wall, as a sign of her closing off from wilbur

PHHOOOOOOEEY THAT WAS A LONG ONE

okay so imma go with this writing cause its fun. so, you asked a few questions in response to the ask you gave me!! so lets go 1) why does she feel betrayed by wilbur? because she was one of the first people she met (canonically) on the SMP. he promised her that it would be a land of peace, prosperity, but she started loving it BECAUSE of wilbur. case and point: when wilbur asks whether she's loyal to l'manberg, she goes "yes, i'm loyal to you, wil." "no, no, not to me- to l'manberg" she quite literally wore his coat around the SMP as a symbol of her friendship and dedication towards him, because they were honestly the best of friends, and she THOUGHT she knew it. points out) and its the way she's learnt to do things. also remember: c!Niki is an unreliable narrator, that's the whole point of her character. it's a response to trauma (as @tubboblr pointed out) you're also probably wondering why she burnt down the l'mantree. and it's not because she "finally realized that l'manberg was bad" it was actually really simple: she wanted to be heard. she had been beaten down and talked over SO much (aka the BASIS for her arc) that she's so desperate to be heard she'll take desperate measures. another reason is because she finally loses hope in l'manberg. she loved it, loves it, but she just lost hope in it. she never hated it. she LOVED it, with all her heart. she just didnt believe it had any hope to be the place she had thought it was. if you have any other questions, let me know!!

[thompsborn]

do you have any spare ironhusbands or sambucky headcanons?

ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY

oh my god okay i’ve been so fucking wrapped up in both ironhusbands and sambucky and absolutely nothing else for WEEKS because of tfatws (obviously if you have seen my endless spam of reblogs but can you BLAME ME) and the portal closed has ironhusbands so i’ve been just. oh my god i am happily drowning in this and them and i do not need nor want air. ok.

also these are all hc’s based just in canon not au, and lol warning this got so long help me, though my brain is so scrambled from tfatws finale that all sambucky thoughts are scrambled and jumbled so i wasn't able to coordinate them as well as ironhusbands so the ironhusbands section is definitely longer pfighf i'm so sorry i'm like this

ironhusbands:

when they met at mit tony didnt know shit. like. like nothing. he didnt know a single god damn thing about anything. like he was a genius he could solve any equation given to him and baffled professors when he was handed like two supposedly impossible equations to this fuckin fourteen year old and he just looked at them with like a mcdonalds burger or some shit hanging out of his mouth and just answered them no problem, but he was still such a hopeless idiot, and rhodey, also a genius attending as a sixteen year old, had to teach him the basics of life, like. making toast. tony how do NOT know how to make toast. its TOAST. you put it in the TOASTER. have you NEVER SEEN A—OH MY GOD HOW DID YOU FUCKING CATCH IT ON FIRE—

he does not perfect the clearly impossible task of making toast until he is 17 and rhodey buys him a cake to celebrate the momentous occasion even though tony went though 528 toasters

you are gold by the national parks. thats it. thats all i have to say. listen to the song and look up the lyrics. you’ll get it.

and also paper planes by jon bellion but specifically for after rhodey tells tony he’s gonna join the air force and tony is worried but doesnt know how to show it and they have like a chill night in and all tony can think about is how stupid he is and how he’s such a coward because he cant get himself to tell rhodey that hi!! i love u!! and im scared to lose u and that you’ll get hurt and maybe die or smth!!

when rhodey finds out about how tony was raised (going with mcu, where tony wasnt physically abused but more emotionally neglected and ignored by howard and always talked down to and compared to others and wasnt treated like he was worthy and never was told he was loved and everything like that) he gets PISSED. like he is MONUMENTALLY angry. and it takes YEARS for him to find out about this too. and it actually puts a bit of a strain on their friendship for awhile when they meet too

like rhodey knows about the starks obviously and he assumes tony is going to be this obnoxious arrogant rich boy asshole and is so not looking forward to being roommates but he was raised to have an open mind and give everyone a chance, but tony was raised to be wary of everyone and keep his walls up and his emotions in shackles because whatever he shows can be used against him, so they clash, you know? they dont fight or anything but theres tension bc it isnt right and they dont get each other.

rhodey tries to be nice and tony doesnt understand nice because his only example of nice is jarvis and his mom and even then his mom and jarvis are always off with his dad so he barely sees them so its still rare for him to experience the nice of them so he doesnt know how to be around someone nice all the time, and so he gets defensive and thinks about how howard drilled it into him to be wary and he thinks maybe rhodey isnt ACTUALLY nice but someone PRETENDING to be

and rhodey starts to feel justified in assuming the worst about tony stark because tony is all cold and distant and rude and is about to stop the keeping an open mind thing about a month into their first year but then he comes back to their dorm early from class one day and tony doesnt come in so rhodey is just standing there and watches for a minute as tony sits there staring down at his twenty sixth attempt at a letter he wants to send his mom becauss he knows his mom likes letters even though he could just call but they havent really called him (howards fault but he’s fourteen still and its hard to rationalize that howards busy life and controlling thumb extends past his son) and rhodey is just confused because tony just suddenly sighs and sniffles a bit and murmurs “this is so stupid” and crumbles up the paper and throws it in the garbage and rhodey cant help but peer into it and barely sees the words hey mom scribbled at the top and that. that. hm. okay.

so rhodey keeps trying because he wasnt supposed to see that but he did and now he kind of has a feeling that maybe tony isnt all that cold and distant and rude as he seems, maybe he just doesnt really know how to be any different, so he thinks about all the subtle little ways that his family has shown him they care about him and starts to invite tony to go get food or to study together even though neither of them really need to study or to help each other with assignments or just anything thats mundane enough to not raise suspicion but still starts to open the door and make tony relax around him just that little bit and then before tony realizes it the end of their first year is there and theyre like friends or something and it hits him that he’s gonna miss rhodey.

for the first time ever there’s someone other than his mom and jarvis that he’s actually going to miss.

rhodey grins at him and says that they’ll be roommates again next year because they have to be and that the summer will be over before they know it and the sentiment is nice but tony spends the summer alone wandering around a house too big and empty after being in a dorm that’s small and has a friend.

but rhodey doesn’t know this. like he knows that tony isn’t the kind of guy he originally assumed but he doesn’t know that he’s literally ignored and neglected and like emotionally and sometimes verbally abused so he’s kind of surprised when the next year begins and they DO end up being roommates again (because tony kind of asked his mom, on a rare day when he got to see her and howard wasnt around, to get mit to make sure they could be) and tony just HUGS him like its been years and they’ve known each other forever but he goes with it and hugs him back because maybe tony’s just more affectionate once he gets to know someone and rhodey is okay w that.

they get closer as the years go by and they graduate from mit together and they’re BEST friends and at the end of the year rhodey invites tony to spend new years eve w his family but tony cant bc howard is having some kind of gala starting at 5 because hes weird and dumb and tony hates it and he also isnt given the option of not going even though he doesnt want to but the entire way there howard drills into him about not fucking up and berates him for all the times he has in the past and when they get there tony is already just not feeling it so he’s like nope!! no!! i simply cannot!!

so he goes in and finds an exit thats in the back and he leaves and finds a fucking payphone of all things and he has rhodeys home number memorized for years now and he calls and someone he doesnt knoe answers and theres music in the background and voices and tony’s entire stomach is in his throat and his heart is sunken into his twisted gut because he just wanted one night where maybe he could smile next to his parents and feel like he fit with them but he couldnt have that and he asks to talk to rhodey and then he is and asks if its too late to accept his invite and rhodey is like yeah of course do u need my address bc its still only 5 pm and its a 2 hour drive between south philadelphia and manhattan so he’d make it with plenty of time before it got to midnight so yay

and tony is like. oh. hm. i dont know how to drive actually. that was a thing that no one ever thought to teach me even though i asked about it about ten million times. and rhodey is used to tony not knowing how to do things that most people their age can (see: the toast) and plus its not uncommon for people from new york to not drive anyway so he doesnt think anything of it and instead asks for tony’s address to come pick him up instead and they’d still make it back by like 9-9:30 so that would work too

and thats when tony is like. well.

about that.

he might be calling from a payphone.

on a random street corner.

and its kind of raining. and he’s cold. and he’s a bit dulled out from everything so he doesn’t really think about the fact that admitting this is going to lead to having to explain what happened and also why and that is happens often. but that doesnt matter because he kind of just wants to be with his best friend and not back at that gala with his dad right now.

rhodey is like,,, ok. ok. wheres a coffee shop nearby u can wait in. and tony thankfully is by a 24 hour one and tells him the name and the street corner its closest to and rhodey is like i’ll be there asap and tony goes and he waits.

a two hour drive turns into an hour and a half because rhodey is Worried™

but when he walks in tony goes from being all dulled out to being all HOLY SHIT because rhodey has a SPLIT LIP and he’s like WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED WHAT THE FUCK WHAT

and rhodey’s like no no its good my uncle was having fun and trying to wrestle with me and he accidentally elbowed me its all good man dont worry about it

tony isnt used to accidentally being hurt tho so he’s still like hmmm but he takes rhodeys word on it and they head out and tony wont say what happened or why he was calling from a payphone ?? which btw tony literally only was able to do bc there happened to be dropped change on the ground because boy would not have change on him ok, but rhodeys like alright lets go with this for now

so they gets to the rhodes house and it is in full swing with family and extended family and adopted family bc they are 100% the family that just adopts the neighborhood kids and the people who have no one else and like ex boyfriends and ex girlfriends even after the relationship ends bc they still are family despite not dating whoever it was they had been dating in order to be introduced to them so its a LOT of people and tony is like. this is semi familiar in terms a lot of people but this is NOTHING like what he has ever seen before holy fucking SHIT

rhodey is just like oh u have a small family then? so ur used to smaller gatherings?

and tonys like wtf are gatherings

and rhodey is starting to get a feel for what might be wrong but just takes tony inside to get him changed because he’s not spending new years eve at the rhodes house in a fucking expensive suit ok

tony is completely out of his element and like he’s not the only white guy there bc again the rhodes adopt people and those people are of every race and nationally you can imagine but he just isnt used to the vibe there are people laughing and sitting close together and playing games and theres music playing but not like classy music its music people can dance to and are dancing to and the food isnt the food he’s used to at galas and shit and nothing is what he’s used to and he just sticks to rhodey’s side like a fucking lost puppy and tries his best not to look like an idiot when rhodey introduces him to people and a lot of them know who he is but dont judge him or assume shit about him bc obviously if he’s friends w rhodey then he’s a good guy and they want to know him and thats enough

but tony is v overwhelmed bc what the FUCK IS HAPPENING this is nothing like anything he has ever experienced EVER

so eventually rhodey can tell he’s getting overwhelmed and takes him inside and lets him have a breather and then asks him about whats going in and thats when rhodey learns about what tonys life at home is really like and. anger.

SO MUCH anger

because not only has every single assumption he has ever made about tony been proven wrong, but now he knows that the best person he knows has never been treated the way he deserves and has never known a true home and comfort and love and safety and

and he’s gonna fix it

and this is the first step

so he takes tony back out and they’re still just friends but this is the day they both quietly realize they might kind of definitely like each other as more because tony is still so confused by the fact that what he knows isnt the normal and overwhelmed by how much there is and how different it is but rhodey holds his hand as a grounding point and whenever it might be too much they move off to the side where they arent completely gone but its less hectic and a bit more quiet and its just nice

tony goes to rhodeys house for every holiday despite whatever howard says

rhodey decks howard the only time they ever meet before tonys parents die and he has the most shit eating grin on his face afterwards that tony cant help but lose his shit laughing his ass off

anyway i didnt mean to ramble for so long about that specific idea so i’ll end the ironhusbands ramble with this one last thought, which is as follows:

rhodey gets hurt in the air force at some point, and it isnt that bad tbh but he does have to go the hospital and shit and gets stitches or whatever idk i dont know what specifically happens i just think it’d be just bad enough that it takes him a few weeks to be able to go back to work but he’s not like OH GOD HURT yk?

but like stated above tony was scared and worried when rhodey told him he was gonna go into the air force so he hears about this and they’re probably like almost 30 at this point because they’re dumb and it takes them forever to get their heads out of their asses (i say this even though in the portal closed it takes them even longer but i digress) rhodey has like his mon his sister his niece visiting him and they were worried but they know hes fine so theyre just talking and in a good mood and then—

door slams open. tony stark enter stage left. disheveled suit, fresh from a meeting he definitely was not supposed to leave, having flown in from maibu the second he heard and then had happy drive him and then got impatient because of traffic and ended up sprinting like ten blocks while happy was like what the FUCK

of course rhodeys family are well aware that these idiots are desperately in love with each other so they’re just like lol ok and just leave the room while tony starts fretting over him like he’s about to die himself if he doesnt know if rhodey is okay and rhodey is like tony tony dude tones stop tony im okay tony stop it

until finally tony just fucking breaks down like full on tears in his eyes voice cracking hands clasped as he leans against rhodeys bed and tells him that he was so scared and he is so scared all the time whenever rhodey is out there because all he can think about is losing him and him getting hurt or dying and it’s maddening and this is when they get their heads out of their asses and kiss for the first time

(irony at its finest bc later when they are married and tony becomes iron man rhodey refuses to not have a suit of his own because if tony is going out there in a metal flying tin can then he isn’t going alone and wow what a power couple)

sambucky:

firstly i’m going to go post tfatws, but i’ll make a bullet point before going into it so if you wanna read up until that point you can but most of this will be random little headcanons based post tfatws

also it isnt like a whole plotline thing like the ironhusbands ones ended up being these ones are more random and kinda all over the place but loosely connected

update from after writing this: i lied

let me start by saying my interpretation of why they are the way they are in civil war is because of steve

thats not saying steve is the bad guy i mean to say that they’re jealous of each other because they thought that THEY were steve’s best friend who the fuck is THIS guy i dont want him here go away

children. they are children.

which i find very funny to imagine from sams pov because he literally is a licensed therapist and would 100% recognize why he’s acting how he is but he’s petty enough to do it anyway

and also he literally was helping steve track bucky down but i like to imagine that sam didnt think they’d ever really find him again and it’d just make him and steve like super mega best friends or something because hes a CHILD

and then from bucky’s pov steve goes through all this trouble to find him and protect him and then this random guy is acting like steve’s best friend and gets to sit in the front seat ??? bullshit. absolutely bullshit. worst thing ever. so stupid.

its so funny to me okay its SO funny

its like that schoolyard thing where your friend makes another friend and you hate it so much that you do something stupid like color on their drawing or put gum in their hair or whatever but they’re adults with 1. super soldier serum or 2. a superhero reputation/avengers status and suit with wings. so thats a thing.

post civil war i dont think they get much yk. because bucky is out in cryo and team cap is on the run and i doubt theyre able to return to wakanda much, if at all, and then it’s infinity war and then it’s endgame and after endgame there’s the aftermath and the aftermath is a mess

i like to think they have some moments before tfatws though. not many but enough for that slight foundation thats we can kind of see in episode 2 yk.

okay NOW it gets into post tfatws so!!

SO post tfatws everything is different because now they not only have spent all this time together, but they understand each other in a way that they didn’t before. in a way no one ever has. not even steve, who may have known them before, but he isn’t here anymore and he wouldn’t understand who they are now vs who they were before and it’s different.

bucky finds comfort in sam’s home town. sam finds comfort in watching bucky find a home there and he doesnt know why.

also sam treats redwing like a puppy and lets him fly around on his own and gets pet and stuff and bucky acts annoyed but the longer it happens you can tell he’s like “oh my god why is this thing endearing”

bucky has nightmares and sam knows this but bucky doesnt know that sam also has nightmares until one night when they’re still in sams home town and they’re staying on the boat because sams nephews are having a sleepover with some friends and they didnt want to get in the way or smth idk i just want an excuse for them to be on the boat and somewhat secluded from people but bucky already woke up from his nightmare and is out on the deck to get some fresh out and then oop

sam havin a nightmare too

because fucking of COURSE sam has nightmares he has been through some shit too!! not being able to catch riley and everything that happened since meeting steve and thanos and he turned to dust alone in the bushes ok like yes everyone that died were traumatized undoubtedly (peter my baby boy baby im so sorry that you got the worst of it) but bucky was around people but sam was laying on the ground and probably just watched his hands as he disappeared and he was alone and like. jesus christ ok.

and then steve trusted him with every weight and everything that comes with the shield not knowing how much more the shield has when he gave it to a black man and just like he has nightmares everyone in marvel does its a fact

but bucky finds out like this and he is shocked even though he realizes he probably should have been able to guess that this is a thing and he knows so much more about sam now than he ever did but this is how he learns more. he learns about riley. he learns so much.

sometimes bucky has those like “oh shit” moments where he’s like “maybe i was kind of a dick to someone who didnt deserve it” and he already had one of those with sam about the shield but he has another one because he assumed shit about sam when they were being all childish and jealous about someone else being friends with steve but like fuck

steve and sam probably got it

the not catching someone. the way it felt to try and to reach out and to miss and to have to choice but to watch as they fell.

what’s different is that steve got bucky back. he got to have that relief, eventually, even if there was the pain of knowing bucky had been taken by hydra, but at least he knew bucky had made it.

sam didn’t have that. riley didnt make it.

therefore, bucky has his “oh shit”

and bucky was already going soft around the edges with sam (as clearly seen in the last two episodes of tfatws, ESPECIALLY the finale because like did tou SEEZ ALL THE HEART EYES oh my GOD) but it’s this that really makes something in him melt and he just. he loses the last remnants of whatever tension or resentment or whatever negative feeling he may have been clutching onto.

there wasnt much left. but now theres none. now its all washed away.

its gone, and he gets it.

sam is a licensed therapist and he knew the reason he was being all dumb and childish and jealous with bucky was because steve had another best friend but also because steve’s other best friend was the guy that had been a big factor in how him and steve understood each other and how they bonded and it

it had kind of felt like they lost part of that when they found bucky again in civil war and he kind of wanted to blame bucky for it even though he didnt actually blame him at all so all it translated to was that dumb kind of jealous thing instead

but now it’s just them. its sam and bucky and it isnt steve and it isnt about steve and it shouldnt be because its about them. its about the boat and the water and the way they sit and watch the waves while the silence settles over them and the way that bucky says, “im sorry.”

its the way sam says, “me too.”

and bucky says, “you dont have to be.”

its the way they stay there until sarah comes to get them for breakfast and sams nephews convince them to play with them and their friends and the world is still shit and there is so much to do but

but its this and its them and that can wait

it can wait

they can take their time if they want to

maybe they’ve earned that much, at least

(it isn't a fast development because they're a complicated pair and there's so much to the two of them that need to figured out individually before they can even realize how well they work together, but the steps are so much easier knowing that they have the other in their corner and bucky knows that sam's home town is a place he's welcome to go and sam helps him make his own dreary little apartment into something that feels real and tangible with a bed and a couch and when they've become something that resembles stable and they've found a balance and they're okay, that's when they realize that maybe they can try for the more that sometimes bubbles under their skin and that they started to think about the more they spend time together. the warmth that sam feels every time he sees bucky playing games with his nephew and the smile that bucky has to fight to hide and still can't fully suppress when sam stands tall and proud with the shield in its rightful place, and it takes time, it takes work, it takes carefully placed bricks to build the foundation they need, but they get there, and when they do...

when they do, they're already happy, and it just makes them happier, and that's what makes it so much better.

that's what makes it worth the wait.)