#then back to Kevin and Carlos being together for 10 years and it never being easy

[mudstoneabyss]

my brains ping-ponging between thinking about kevlos and thinking about charlevin at rapid speeds

[kevin--of-desert-bluffs]

Self reblogging this to add that it's so easy to forget that Carlos experienced 10 years in the desert otherworld. That's a decade! It's a long time! Imagine if you had to give up everything you've done in the last ten years and return to doing whatever it is you were doing in life ten years ago as if barely any time has passed.

Everyone expects Carlos to just adjust back because it's been just a few months to them, but his actual time away and the fact he's Autistic will not make that easy for him. In some ways it's easy, his relationship with Cecil and the scientists for example, a lot of Autistic people are good at picking up relationships where they left off even if it's been half a lifetime since you saw the person.

It's the routine that's hard, it's all different again. It's NV, which he thinks of as home but it just feels a bit strange again and a lot of the citizens still treat him as an interloper. It's feeling older than he is to them. It's the fact he never expected to make a friend out there but then he and Kevin became friends and built so much together which Kevin was openly appreciative of. It's not being able to share memories from a decade of life with Cecil because Cecil wasn't there. It's missing Cecil so deeply he almost can't stand to be away from him any more. It's missing NV but NV not seeming to miss him except from Cecil and the scientists. It's hiding when he hurts. It's the total disconnect from time once again.

Carlos is adaptable! He throws himself back into it all! He has a family, he has new work. But he still misses the things he did in those ten years because they weren't nothing.

Then Cecil tells him that after 'ten NV years' he's only just been accepted as a NV citizen.

And he thinks of the missing decade that nobody but he knows about. And he thinks about how he willingly gave that up to be back in NV and doesn't regret it but it does leave a space in his heart. And he thinks about how hard it is to be accepted in NV, when he fit right into the otherworld.

And his feelings are so, so complex inside of him. Too complex to explain to Cecil and Carlos knows deep down he shouldn't keep this from his husband but he doesn't want to make Cecil upset. So he keeps it in. And sometimes he's not sure where he is when he wakes up. But he's home. He's home.

shut the FUCK up. carlos mistaking Cecil for Kevin when he gets back from the dow, waking up and being confused and uncomfortable about why kevin is holding him so close and pulling away before realizing its cecil but still being uncomfortable with touch from him now. carlos waking up and getting extremely stressed out because kevin isnt there and kevin always waits for him to wake up and carlos is about to hit the call button before he. remembers. and he can't call. not now. and carlos walking into the kitchen and cecil making him what he remembers being carlos's favorite coffee but. but it's too sweet now and this isn't carlos's favorite mug anymore his favorite one is. is somewhere he can't go back to. and carlos getting overwhelmed at his lab because there are just too many people now and they won't leave him alone and none of them will help him with more dangerous experiments and its too cold and he just. he can't. and carlos casually talking and laughing about a near death experience he had and cecil looks terrified and. and carlos realizes he can't talk about those with cecil like he could with someone else. and every bed every chair being so soft its overwhelming and night vale not being hot enough and everyones too touchy and hes stressed about all the specinens and everything he left behind and he keeps going to grab his notepad or call for kevin or say something that no one here knows about but they should and he. he just can't.

[melians-library]

This is my first ever fic that I’ve posted, so constructive criticism is very much appreciated! I went through a rough breakup recently, and writing this was my way of coping. This fic is written in the WtNV universe post episode 70b, and is based on the song The Things We Used to Share by Thomas Sanders. I hope you all enjoy!

────────･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ────────

The Things We Used to Share

Kevin was ecstatic. Carlos was going to stay in the Desert Otherworld! With him! For once in his indeterminately long life, he was somebody’s first choice. Kevin knew that he wasn’t the reason for Carlos deciding to stay, but even so it made him feel wanted. He was deliberating on how to greet Carlos when he returned from Night Vale for the last time, when he noticed the letter perched on the edge of his desk.

Kevin picked it up and began to read. And he understood. Although he was no longer broadcasting for Strex, Kevin considered himself a professional. And no matter how much he wanted to cry or scream, he was still on air. He needed to keep his composure, but he could rapidly feel it slipping away from him. It wouldn’t have been as bad if he hadn’t been given hope only for it to be ripped harshly away, but as that is what happened, Kevin was only seconds away from breaking. He finished the last of his broadcast as quickly as he could, and signed off, before switching off the microphone.

As the neon sign proclaiming him On Air blinked off, Kevin lost the last shreds of his composure. He was cracking along all of the seams he had so carefully sewn together during his time with Carlos. He was shattering, and now there was nobody left who cared about him enough to put him back together.

Kevin broke. And the screams were deafening.

Kevin was paralyzed in his booth, sobs and cries wracking his body for what seemed like years, but in reality was merely a few hours. By the time he managed to collect himself, the sun was setting over the mountain and the Desert Otherworld was beginning to rest for the night. As Kevin stood to go home and attempt to sleep, he paused. With a chill, he realized just how much Carlos had twined himself through his life. Although he was gone in body, there were pieces of him left scattered throughout Kevin’s world.

He shuddered with this realization and came to the conclusion that if he was to move on, he needed to have a fresh start. Away from the memory of Carlos, the oaky tones of his voice as he rambled on and on about obscure theorems, the glow of his beautiful hair in the setting sun, the shine of his smile when Kevin did something right. He needed to forget these things, because otherwise he feared he would never be truly happy again. Not with the memories of all he had lost.

Kevin stumbled home in the soft light of dusk, avoiding Doug’s questions as best he could without being perceived as rude. Finally, he arrived at his home and took a deep, fortifying breath before softly pushing the door open

Although Kevin already knew the sight that would greet him, it was no less painful to see the pure white lab coat thrown haphazardly over his small couch, as though the owner knew he would return soon and didn’t bother to take it with him. Remembering his last night with Carlos, as they both drank what little alcohol they had and laughed together about nothing, Kevin’s knees buckled. More and more memories resurfaced as he kneeled on the ground, surrounded with snapshots of what his life could have been, and Kevin almost broke again. However, he knew that if he gave up here he may never stand again, forever lost in things that wouldn’t ever be. Kevin took a breath and stood carefully on shaky legs.

He took in the room around him, careful not to focus on one thing for too long to avoid getting lost again. He steadied himself and moved into the kitchen to grab an old cardboard box. Even that, though, was linked to memories. The box originally had the Strex logo in large print over every surface, until he and Carlos had spent the afternoon with colored paints. Kevin used mainly yellow, because he said it reminded him of the old Desert Bluffs, and Carlos, of course, used purple. At first, they worked separately, but slowly they began swirling the colors together, creating a blend of the two cities. It was beautiful, but the beauty tasted sour in Kevin’s mouth. It was time to start building new memories, alone.

After snapping out of his reverie, Kevin returned to the living room. Now armed with his box, he began collecting everything that reminded him of Carlos. Starting with the lab coat that had stunned him upon walking in, he continued to the test tubes scattered along the coffee table. He surveyed the room, and bit back a whimper at the sight of a pair of Carlos’s reading glasses. Those, he placed into the case which he kept in the side table for times like these, when Carlos forgot them after staying over. This time was different though: this time Carlos wasn’t coming back.

Kevin swallowed a sob, tossed the glasses case into the box, and continued through the room.

It took him all night. By the time he placed the filled box on the table and turned his tear-stained face to the window, it was midmorning. Looking around his small home, Kevin noticed all the empty spaces where Carlos used to fit. He saw the place on the kitchen counter where the toaster used to be, the toaster which Carlos had insisted he buy after tiring of the same eggs for breakfast every morning. He saw the coat rack by the door, looking unbalanced without the never-ending supply of lab coats, all in various states of disarray. He saw how complete Carlos made him, and how he felt like a piece of himself had been ripped away.

As he was looking around, he was hit with a realization: Carlos had planned this. He didn’t decide to leave that day, no, that letter was prepared in advance. Carlos had been letting Kevin believe that he was important, that he was wanted, when in reality he was just a placeholder for Cecil. Even though Kevin thought it impossible for this to hurt worse, the realization hit him like ice through his veins: he wasn’t important to Carlos. He never was.

After spending 10 years in the Otherworld with him, Kevin thought that they were close. As a matter of fact, he had never felt that close to anyone. After Lauren and Daniel, Kevin was unused to kindness. Every time Carlos asked his opinion or checked he was alright, Kevin’s heart beat faster. Perhaps he mistook Carlos’s natural good for affection, but it didn’t feel like it. For once, he had felt truly loved by another. He had felt loved by Carlos, even if it was only platonically, and Carlos had left without even a goodbye. Maybe that was all Kevin was worth.

Kevin breathed deeply before opening the door leading out into the desert. He carried the box to Carlos’s makeshift lab and placed it gently on the table. Though he knew that Carlos would never return to the Otherworld, he didn’t want to throw anything away. It felt better this way, like he was returning something that never truly belonged to him. Because that was the crux of the issue: Carlos never belonged to him. His affection was freely given, but his heart was kept by another. Even with that, Kevin had lost his own. He had given it to Carlos, and with his departure to Night Vale, to Cecil, so went his heart.

Tears streaming down his face and unsure when they began flowing, Kevin returned to his home. He surveyed the now much emptier space, and his eyes were drawn to a paper laid on the kitchen table. Before approaching he knew what it was: the letter. The letter that destroyed him, that showed how little he mattered even to the person he cared about most. Kevin approached it and picked it up with trembling hands. After mere seconds of deliberation, he decided to keep it. It would be a good reminder.

A reminder that he was unlovable.

A reminder that he wasn’t worth anything…

Not even a proper goodbye.

[makingthetwinsrelevant-blog]

Why this year is different (although 5 game series are often skewed by sample size and who knows if it will even matter)

I’ve heard a lot of commentary about the Twins season. None of it is too optimistic about their prospects in the playoffs, and that’s understandable. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uLIt6xGSqek

That link is the game following the last playoff win in franchise history. It boils down to one mistake, leaving Joe Nathan to try for a third inning. Since then and including that game, the Twins are 0-13, with 10 of those losses coming against the Yankees, who the Twins will play this year for the Division series. But the Nathan mistake isn’t why we lost that series, nor is the Torii Hunter missed catch in ‘06 the reason we lost that series.

A lot of folks think we’re cursed, and that certainly would work as a narrative. A-Rod’s RBI double in 2004, or his home run in ’09 preceding Texiera’s walk-off. Curtis Granderson’s triple in ’10 comes to mind. But everything must come to an end- the curse of the Bambino did, as did the Cubs’, and the Twins aren’t going to lose every playoff game for the rest of their existence. It starts with one game, and I think the 2019 squad is built to do that. Here’s why:

2002 Twins 86-75

2003 Twins 85-77

2004 Twins 87-75

2006 Twins 93-69

2009 Twins 86-77

2010 Twins 92-70

2017 Twins 83-79

2019 Twins 98-64

 These are the Pythagorean records for all Twins playoff teams since I have been conscious, and it really validates what I stress when I talk about the 2019 Twins, which is that this is the first team I’ve ever seen that is actually GOOD. Like good good. ALCS good. Which is why we can beat the Yankees this year, legitimately, or at least take it to game 5. Let me explain:

 2002-2018: From Rick Reed to Addison Reed

The 2002 team had no fear. The playoffs were brand new and they won a weak AL Central with solid contributions from tons of guys- no mid 2010’s Detroit Tigers stars and scrubs BS here. 12 guys had more than 2 bWAR (a measure of overall value from baseballreference.com- 0 means totally replaceable, anything above 5 means a star player), including a career year for J.C Romero, who as a lefty pitched in 81 innings, allowing a total of 17 runs, with 3 home runs, 62 hits. bWAR for his season was 3.6. We also got nice above average seasons from Corey Koskie (How good could he have been not under the Twins slap hitting tutelage and minus his later concussion issues?), Bobby Kielty, Tony Fiore (91 good innings out of the pen), Kyle Lohse, Dustan Mohr; even Rick Reed was pretty good that year. The Giants and the Angels were better constructed teams, and it would have been a miracle for the Twins to go all the way that year. I couldn’t believe when they beat they A’s, and I couldn’t believe when Joe Mays shut the Angels down in Game 1. 8 innings, no runs and the Angels could not get a barrel to the ball to save their lives. We lost to the Angels because they were a better team (They won 99 games that year) but like the Astros in 2015, it was a good stepping stone for a solid core of guys.

The 2003 team was worse. There was no David Ortiz and only Brad Radke had an ERA+ (a measure of pitching that corrects for context, average score is 100) that was above average in our regular rotation. It was 101.  Shannon Stewart and Johan Santana had to save the season and lift us over the White Sox* and Royals, who had a magical season 11 years before they meant to- they had prime Mike Sweeney and Carlos Beltran, but their #1 pitcher (as I recalled but had to confirm) was Darrell May, who had a legitimately good season but would never do THAT again.

*I’m pretty sure the White Sox were the better team that year. They had prime Bartolo, Mark Buehrle, early ok Jon Garland and that one of year of Esteban Loaiza where he almost won the CY Young (226.1 innings of 2.90 ERA ball with a k rate of 8.2, his career k rate was 5.9). They also had prime Magglio Ordonez and Carlos Lee, and this was one of the years in the oughts where Frank Thomas stayed together and hit 42 bombs.

But the Twins prevailed with Shannon Stewart magic plus solid years from Mientkiewicz, Koskie and Pierzynski, won Game 1 against the Yankees because we let Johan Santana free (for 4 innings, as that was the game where he didn’t eat enough potassium and cramped out of the game), and then got swept the rest of the way, getting shut down by Andy Pettite Roger Clemens and David Wells. It was kind of an accidental bullpen game in game 1, but more on that later.

 The ‘04 Twins went back to being pitching dominant, with the first year of full season Johan (and his best year) and Joe Nathan joining the fold along with lights out Juan Rincon (watch him strike out Jorge Posada in the 8th in game 2). Radke was great, and Carlos Silva soaked up the rest. If Joe Mauer hadn’t gotten hurt that team could have been something, because the lineup was rough and relied a lot on career year Lew Ford (more on that later). Doug Mientkiewicz, Jacque Jones, Christian Guzman and Henry Blanco all struggled to various degrees. Morneau provided a spark in the second half, taking over for Mientkiewicz at the trade deadline and hitting 19 bombs.

As I inferred, I put myself through watching game 2 of the ALDS against the Yankees (up 1-0) recently and everything that I remembered from it came rushing back: Koskie’s double against Rivera that would have scored 2 but bounced into the stands, instead tying the game at 5. Then Hunter’s big home run in the 12th, and Nathan to all the world looking like he was out of gas in his third inning of work in the 12th - with 1 out he walked Miguel Cairo as well as Jeter to bring up A-Rod. What I didn’t remember was that Nathan threw a decent slider off the plate down and away, and A-Rod showed why he was one of the top 5 hitters of his generation and almost hit it out, poking a ground rule double (were it a regular double it would have been a walk off) to tie the game. After intentionally walking Sheffield, J.C Romero got Hideki Matsui on a soft fly out to Jones in right, and a good throw would have gotten Jeter. That didn’t happen, and one Carlos Silva start and a Rincon implosion later the Twins were done. The Twins hit well in the series after not doing that all season, but two decisions cost them: leaving Nathan in obviously, and giving Carlos Silva (and Kyle Lohse) a start. The lineup had gotten hot, but archaic ideas about how to use pitching in the playoffs cost them big- although those ideas wouldn’t truly be challenged until Craig Counsell took the Dodgers to 7 games in 2018.

I was jazzed about ’06. They had a good power and speed mix (On base percentages of Bartlett, Castillo and Punto: .367, .358, .352) with Morneau and Mauer both breaking out to post over 10 bWAR between them, Santana winning another Cy Young, and Francisco Liriano having his Greek tragedy. The bullpen was great, with Nathan having arguably his best year, Dennys Reyes giving up 5 runs the whole year and Rincon, Pat Neshek and Crain pitching in solidly.

But Barry Zito outdueled Santana in game 1, Mark Kotsay hit his inside the park home run on the ball Torii dove for but couldn’t keep in front in game 2 (right after we had tied the game with back to back jacks from Cuddyer and Morneau). And that was all the starting pitching we had- with Liriano done, and Boof Bonser pitching out of his mind in game 2, we had can’t-brush-his-teeth torn rotator cuff Brad Radke trying to gut his way through and running out of guts. And cartilage.

Maybe Craig Counsell or Kevin Cash could have made it work, but in 2006 there just wasn’t enough pitching.

In ’09 we had MVP Joe Mauer, Jason Kubel’s best year and Denard Span’s emergence. But the pitching relied a lot on Nick Blackburn and the mad rush to beat the Tigers in game 163 left us with Brian Duensing in game 1 against the Yankees. Brian Duensing was a nice pitcher that year, but he couldn’t handle that assignment. Game 2 was the Phil Cuzzi calling a fair ball foul game, the most errant umpiring call I know of next to the Armando Gallaraga perfect game disaster. Mauer singled anyway to start the 11th. So did Kubel and Cuddyer. Bases loaded, no outs, Delmon Young at the plate- he scaldes a line drive to Texiera at first for a loud out. Carlos Gomez grounds into a fielders choice at home, and Brendan Harris pops out. Kinda deserved that walkoff.

Who are you pitching with this team in a 7 game series anyway? And depth was an issue as well, otherwise Harris wouldn’t have come in for MATT TOLBERT, Gomez wouldn’t have hit with his .623 season OPS, and nor would Delmon with his .733. Blackburn and Pavano combined to go 12 innings, allowing 3 total runs between them in games 2 and 3, so even with those bonuses the fact that the team couldn’t even get to 4 games says a lot.

2010 could have been something, with a good offense led by Mauer and Thome, the one year Delmon Young was good, the year we had J.J Hardy and Orlando Hudson and Liriano had 200 k’s. But Morneau got his concussion, Nathan had Tommy John surgery, Kubel Cuddyer and Span all had bad years and it came down to Curtis Granderson hitting a clutch triple off of a cruising Liriano (The Twins led 3-0 going into the bottom of the 6th). Then the Twins realized that as nice as their seasons were, Carl Pavano and Duensing weren’t pitchers you rely on in the postseason- they pitched to contact and if their command wasn’t perfect they would get exposed. Guess what happened.

In 2017 the team wasn’t good. And they wouldn’t have made the playoffs if the Orioles, Angels and Royals didn’t all collapse while the Twins played .500 ball in September. Their starting pitching was average, with a great Ervin Santana season and a good Berrios one. But unlike the other teams on this list, the bullpen was suspect, with a not-quite-figured-out Ryan Pressly, sinker throwing Tyler Duffey and a Matt Belisle on the right side with a non-slider throwing Taylor Rogers on the left. Alan Busenitz and Trevor Hildenberger had career years but weren’t helpful in the Wild Card game, or really ever again.

The offense was the best of all the teams so far in a bit of foreshadowing, scoring 815 runs and featuring the last good Brian Dozier season, the start of Jorge Polanco busting out, and Joe Mauer having one last .300 season. Miguel Sano looked like a star for 3 months, then busted his shin and got a titanium rod inserted into it because he doesn’t care about baseball or something. Byron Buxton even had his first sustained period of excellence in the second half (and played 140 games!)

 Relying on the back end of the rotation

Those are the 7 playoff teams of the millennium. And here are the Game 3 starters for each ALDS team starting with ’02:

Rick Reed

Kyle Lohse

Carlos Silva

Zombie Brad Radke

Carl Pavano

Brian Duensing

 That group had a combined record of 0-6. This year the hope is that the new regime is smart enough to know that, even though they have 2 starters in Kyle Gibson and Martin Perez who are comparable to that group, and who tried hard and won double digit games, their best bet is to bullpen that game.

One aspect of the playoffs that teams are getting wise to but which have killed Clayton Kershaw in the past, is the inclination to “trust your guys” and “dance with the girl who you brought” or some other idiom about sticking with a certain pitcher out of loyalty or sense of obligation. Carlos Silva had a good ’04 season; of course Gardy would want to give him a playoff start. His results were quite a bit better than Kyle Gibson’s 2019.

But hitters hit .310/.342/.462 against Silva that year. You’re trusting your season to him continuing to get lucky. He gave up 10 hits and the series swung 2-1 to the Yankees.

 Results aren’t predictive

What we have in 2019 is the possibility that the Twins brass has learned from the mistakes of the past. You saw it in 2017 when they traded our closer, Brandon Kintzler, at the trade deadline. They knew that despite what the results showed, the team wasn’t good. Even though they got hot and made the WC game, they knew it wasn’t sustainable yet, and didn’t go crazy on free agents or win-now trades.

What the Levine Falvey regime did was take an objective view of their assets (is Mike Morin’s success sutainable? No? Ok then I won’t pitch him in the 7th inning of a playoff game. In fact, I’ll let him be the Phillies problem). They also threw all the “Twins way” shit out the window. No more getting benched for not going the other way, or for trying to hit a home run. And I know that point of view is very much a feeling and not really tangible- something inferred from David Ortiz’s comments years ago, a general sense watching games announced by Dick Bremer and Bert Blyleven, that power is nice but luxurious, as though wanting it too badly should be a sin. And then you have Joe Mauer, who embodied every aspect of that feeling- a guy who looked for his whole career like he could hit home runs, but didn’t because he wasn’t flashy, he didn’t want to draw attention to himself and must have believed that slapping singles and doubles to left field would be a more productive route in the end.

Here’s the big secret about Joe Mauer: As talented as he was- as a catcher, in his general coordination, in his eye at the plate, and his ability to slap an RBI single in some key spots for 14 years, he was kind of a moron. Seemed like he was a nice guy. But he has never in his life said anything remotely close to insightful and I truly believe that he earnestly and wrongly thought he could best serve his team by staying behind the ball and slapping it to left field. He was probably told that from a young age.

He mistook an illusion for a reality, and so did the Twins for 51 years. Every color guy on every team’s broadcast will talk about the importance of the fundamentals, getting the guy over, laying down a good bunt and going the other way. They will talk up players who do that for eternity, and constantly lament how the game isn’t played that way anymore. To every team trying to win, this is taken with a big fucking grain of Morton brand industrial sidewalk salt. They want 2-3 guys like that. To the Twins it was religion. They wanted 12-15 guys like that. They wanted Matt Tolbert, Nick Punto, Denny Hocking and Juan Castro. The did NOT want J.J Hardy or David Ortiz.

This has changed, hopefully, and with Mauer gone, it may have rinsed away completely. We set the freaking home run record. Mitch Garver openly admits he is trying to hit home runs. Max Kepler found out his power is to the pull side. Jorge Polanco found out he could take a rip early in the count. It’s all new; it’s all different. And I’m not saying the Twins will beat the Yankees in the first round because of this philosophy shift. What I am saying is that the 2019 Twins are NOT:

A Cinderella team getting their feet wet around 12 slightly above average guys (2002)

A decent offense with no pitching plus Shannon Stewart (2003)

A great pitching staff 1-2 with an average offense that gave starts to Carlos Silva and Kyle Lohse in the playoffs (2004)

A team with Boof Bonser as its #2 (2006)

A team that relied heavily on Blackburn, Pavano and Duensing in playoff games (2009 and 2010)

A lucky team with no bullpen and 1.5 starters (2017)

 So maybe they will.

  What’s different now

The best team out of the prior playoff teams is probably the ’04 team, whose struggling offense didn’t struggle in the playoffs. And with Santana being the best and Radke being HIS best, a modern manager could have used their decent bullpen to build something.

Now imagine the ’04 team, except their offense is much better. MUCH better. And despite having only two effective starters, can bullpen their way to wins with a pen that goes 6-7 deep. And unlike a Tony Fiore or a Ron Mahay, or a Matt Capps or Alex Burnett, this bullpen does stuff you can’t fake- stuff you can’t luck your way into.

Opponents are hitting .157/.223/.245 against Tyler Duffey in the second half.

They’re hitting .159/.220/.354 against Trevor May

(Both those guys were good in the first half, too)

Taylor Rogers gave up a .225/.273/.353 line for the year

To my count there are 9 relievers that can be counted on in different spots- Rogers, Duffey, May, Romo, Littell, Stashak, Dobnak, Graterol and Smeltzer (by different spots I mean that Rocco won’t throw Smeltzer into the 8th inning of a tie game to face Aaron Judge).

That depth can be leveraged to overcome the loss of Michael Pineda, and the fact that Berrios and Odorizzi are no locks to be effective. Stashak and Smeltzer can both give you 3 innings of effective mop-up duty that keep games close, and allows the offense to come back by exploiting New York’s middling starting pitching, and mercurial late inning relief (Namely Britton, Green and Ottavino).

 How to cope when Lew Ford leads your team in total bases

Almost as importantly, the offense isn’t going to need guys who had career years to continue thriving in the post when they were clearly playing above their true talent level. Lew Ford carried the ’04 team at times, but he was still Lew Ford, and he showed it against the Yankees and for the rest of his career. Same with Nick Punto in ��06. Nelson Cruz is a force who scares the Royals as much as the Yankees.

Mitch Garver didn’t hot streak his way into a 1000 OPS; he’s kept it above .919 since April 9th. Check his game log.

These guys are actually good. So is Max Kepler, who I hope is ok. You don’t hit 36 bombs with reverse platoon splits by accident.

Marwin Gonzalez isn’t a great hitter but I trust he’ll take a good at bat when we need him too. You’ll appreciate that when you watch rookie Jason Kubel swing at two straight pitches at his eyes against Rivera in ’04.

Eddie Rosario is the wild card, and teams NEED* a wild card:

*Delmon Young on the Tigers, Yasiel Puig on the Dodgers, Alfonso Soriano on the Yankees, Eric Byrnes on the Diamondbacks. Rafael Devers for the Red Sox last year. That’s Rosario. Everyone needs an underachiever from the regular season to come up in the post.

Rosario, Polanco, Garver, Cruz, Sano and Kepler could all be game changing offensive players in a short series, which is not a quantity we’ve seen since Morneau went down with his concussion in ’10.

There’s no curse, the Yankees just exploited an obvious weakness of the Twins 4.5 separate times. That weaknesses boiled down to smoke and mirrors results that translated to good regular season stats, which led to Terry Ryan and Gardy trusting those results to be predictive. The 2019 team wasn’t built that way, otherwise Brandon Kintzler might still be part of it. The bullpen will have to perform for a lot of innings, the lineup will have to score, and one of Berrios and Odorizzi will have to perform to or above his talent level. As likely as it has ever been, this team could, say it with me here- take it to a game 5.

[motorsportficexchange]

The gifts are ready to read :)

A huge thank you to everyone who took part (and to everyone who supported the writers)! There’s so many amazing new fics and it was lovely to see so many writers taking part :)

Enjoy ;D

All I want to do in the middle of the evening is hold you tight by fluffypenguinpower for formula1trash

Carlos/Max – Explicit

The one where Max and Carlos accidentally switch suitcases, Pierre laughs at Max's misery and Max and Carlos finally figure out they like each other.

and all above, a starcrossed love by TheFlirtMeister for theianitor

Jenson/Seb – Teen – (logged in ao3 users only)

“Shut up.” Sebastian says. “Jenson’s not my boyfriend.”

“No, you’ve just been hopelessly in love with him since first year.” Nico rolls his eyes. “Just cast a love spell on him. Or slip him a love potion. Or just snog him when you next see him.”

And just like that he knew by TheShhhSpot for Dr3amingInColour

Daniel/Seb – Gen

Soulmate AU where your soulmate's name appears on your right wrist (Left if you are left handed) and your greatest nemesis' name appears on your left one.

Daniel doesn’t remember when he started loving Sebastian. He just knows that when he realized he did, he stopped caring about who’s name would appear on his right wrist until it was too much to bear.

Don't Think Twice by Anonymous for TheFlirtMeister

James/Niki – Teen

Supernatural Elements, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Established Relationship.

go big or go home by montecarlos for anonissue

Andre/Jean-Eric, Sam/Jean-Eric – Teen

He is well known, due to his story, the one that seems to possess some level of disbelief. The drifting process has been interrupted and severed numerous times over the years that the Jaeger program has been in operation. Nobody had managed to control the Jaeger for more than one minute on their own. Jev had managed it for ten minutes. He’s a man who should be dead, or at least catastrophically brain damaged from the effects of piloting the Jaeger alone. “Yes, that Jean-Eric Vergne,”

(a Pacific Rim au)

Going Further by theianitor for CustardCreamies

Kimi/Seb, Valtteri/Kimi, Valtteri/Kimi/Seb – Mature

This thing between them had been going on for most of the season, and it always played out pretty much the same, but Valtteri hadn’t been sure they’d be continuing into the coming year. Being invited to Kimi’s during the winter break and finding Sebastian there though, he had been pretty sure. Pretty sure, but still not entirely so.

If only yesterday took place tomorrow by anonissue for nicorosberg

Andre/Jean-Eric – Explicit

May 2018's a bad month for André: Parix ePrix, he runs out of energy hitting Bird, Evans, Di Grassi in the process, and losing P2 in the last 200 meters of the race -- gets 10 grid place penalty for it. 6hr of Spa, the three car is DSQ after podiuming. Nürburgring, mechanical issues thrashed an otherwise solid performance in the car that should've podiumed for class. All he wants is a weekend in Nivelles alone to recharge and celebrate Mother's Day; Jev, of course, has other ideas.

More than Casual by Quagswagging for NicoTheFlammble

Nico/Kevin – Explicit

Kevin and Nico both suck at feelings, but that doesn't stop them from finding each other at night.

Then Nico can't do it anymore and pushes Kevin away, but Kevin won't let him go so easily.

Our Golden Days. by fearless_seas for xoxodelvidestruction

Marc/Dani – Teen

The first thing Marc does when he meets Dani is flirt with him; and the first thing that Dani thinks is that he is too old for him.

Overcoming Anxiety, One Marquez at a Time by xoxodelvidestruction for Ly__canthrope

Alex/Marc/Reader – Teen

When a World Champion believes in you, how can you not?

The Perfect Photo by F1_rabbit for TheShhhSpot

Marcus/Jolyon, Alex & Marcus, Kevin/Stoffel – Explicit

Jo's bored hanging around the paddock, so him and Dany come up with a bet, whoever finds Marcus sleeping in the strangest place is the winner. But it all gets a little out of hand...

Sleepover by AngelinaZebi for F1_rabbit

Esteban/Lance – Gen

Lance invites Esteban to his home watching movie.

Special Delivery! by writtenfripperies for LittleRookie

Marcus/Stoffel – Mature – (logged in ao3 users only)

Marcus receives a package he wasn't quite expecting.

Stay by NicoTheFlammble for writtenfripperies

Carlos/Max – Not Rated

Carlos has to get on a plane. Max is sleepy and stubborn. That's pretty much it.

Strength and courage when others would see you fall by CustardCreamies 

Sebastian/Mark – Gen

In a world where soulmates feel each others pain, Mark can feel the intense pain from the injury Sebastian does to his neck and wonders about the strength Sebastian has to keep going despite how much it hurts to do so.

Summer Camping by formula1trash for montecarlos

Pierre/Stoffel – Teen

When the summer break starts after the Hungarian Grand Prix, the drivers go on their annual Summer camp together. However, one of the drivers goes missing. Pierre and Stoffel go looking for him together, both completely unaware of their feelings for each other.

Surprise on Capri by LittleRookie for AngelinaZebi

Esteban/Lance, Pierre/Charles, Daniel/Max – Teen

Esteban is on holiday in Capri with Pierre and Charles. But on the island there is a surprise waiting for him.

Swapped by F1_rabbit for LittleRookie

Marcus/Kevin/Stoffel – Explicit

Everyone gets an hour to swap bodies with their soulmates, and they have time to collect clues to their soulmate's identity, but things aren't that simple for Stoffel...

take a sip from my secret potion (one taste and you'll be mine) by nicorosberg for fluffypenguinpower

Luca/Alex – Gen

“You idiot.” Uccio snaps. “You do realise that this is a really powerful truth potion, it’s not going to just wear off? Firstly, you couldn’t have used it on Marquez anyway, because it counts as a psychological advantage and as you full well know, we can’t use magic to our advantage in any competitive events. Secondly, this won’t wear off until Luca’s revealed his biggest fucking secret, and I doubt he even knows what that is, so it could take forever.”

Luca does know what his biggest secret is, but he’s not particularly willing to share his affection for another rider (especially the younger brother of Valentino’s biggest rival) in front of his brother, Uccio or Pecco, even if his team mate already knows.

“Ah, well that is slightly unfortunate.” Valentino gives Luca a guilty look. “My bad. I’ll fix it, Luca, I promise.”

“I’m going to kill you.” Luca tells him, deadpan.

Teach Me by Ly__canthrope for fearless_seas

Daniel/Seb – Gen

Daniel is horrible at speaking Italian and somehow he has roped Sebastian into teaching him.

Waking Up In Vegas by Dr3amingInColour for Quagswagging

Daniel/Max – Explicit – (logged in ao3 users only)

"'But to be somewhere so special with someone so special, I’ve never had this before.' Dan quickly confessed, cuddling closer to his boyfriend.

'I wouldn’t have it any other way.” Max whispered before falling back into Daniel’s hold, cuddling closer.'

(Or, the one where it's hotel rooms, and a little bit more.)

When Fate wants to have Fun by LittleRookie for F1_rabbit

Nico/Kevin, Marcus/Jolyon – Mature

Nico has a soulmark in an embarrassing place. And he can't read it. Kevin doesn't care about finding his soulmate. Until he meets Nico. But things aren't as easy as they want them to be. 

You can view the whole collection here :)

And don’t forget to show your love with comments and kudos <3

[classic-rock-roller]

1. You’re hanging out with Bonham and Arin and Danny at lunch during the filming of the power hour. You’re talking about supporting small artists when Danny says, “Me and Arin found this really cool artist the other day, they’re not very well known, but they covered video game stuff and some stuff they say are covers but I’ve never heard them before. Here, I’ll show you.” He pulls it up, and it’s Bonham’s old YouTube channel of cover songs from before you knew each other. How do you and her react to seeing it, and what do Danny and Arin say after you tell them? Me: oh that was Bons before we became a band. Dan and Arin: What?! Bons: yeah that's actually how we met partially 2. Kevin and Bonham are still fighting, and one day, Kevin calls her a talentless hack who got lucky. Before anyone else can say anything, you hear her say, “If you’re not careful I’m gonna beat the jew outta you, boy.” How do you, Erik, Linus, and Sean respond? Erik and Sean: fight, fight, fight!!! Linus: ...idiots Me: Ok, that's enough you both need time to cool off and Kevin stop being a fucking jackass 3. Bonham got bored one day so she decided to color her hair. She shows up to rehearsal with a blonde sunburst on top of her dark hair, and says, “What do you think?” Sean is the first one to respond, and he says, “I don’t like it, change it back.” How do you, Kevin, and the rest of your band respond? Me: I like it. Linus: it looks good Erik is in the bathroom Kevin: I think it looks good too 4. You’re hanging out with Kevin one day and Bonham is upstairs sleeping. After a while you hear a muffled, “Shit!” come from upstairs. Soon, she comes down the stairs, frantically saying, “I’m late, I’m late, I’m–Oh fuck!” followed by a wooden sounding crunch. You turn and see that in her haste, she broke through the center of one of your stairs. How do the two of you respond? Me: Are you ok?! Kevin: Great going, Bons 5. You’ve been hanging out with the grumps more often lately, and Danny has taken to giving you and Bonham nicknames. He calls you Lovely and he calls her a Delicious Treat. One day Bonham asks him how he came up with them. How does he respond, and what do you, Bonham, and Arin say in response? Danny: Well, BabyCarrot is Lovely and Bonham is a delicious treat. We both blush Arin: That doesn't explain anything. 6. Bonham has been drinking more lately, and one day she’s drunk while at your house. Mal asks you and Kevin, “What’s wrong with auntie Bons?” Kevin says, “Well buddy, lately she’s been drinking too much silly juice and it’s making her do different things.” Before he can respond, Bonham shouts from across the room, “Fuck you Kevin. And it’s not silly juice it’s necessary juice.” How do you, Kevin, and Mal respond? Mal goes up to Bons and goes, "Auntie Bons, please don't drink anymore silly juice. I don't like you like this. It scares me." Kevin: Yeah, Bons, you're scaring my kid. Me: Do it for Mal, please Bons. 7. You come in to rehearsal one day with Kevin to find the boys in the studio and Bonham handcuffed to a desk. “How’d you get like that?” You ask. “Nevermind that, can you get me out of here?” Kevin sets to work on picking the lock and says, “You always seem to get handcuffed to stuff when Sean’s around.” She responds with, “Shut up if it weren’t for handcuffs I’d still be a virgin.” The boys are coming into the booth just as she says that. How do you, Sean, Kevin, Erik, and Linus respond? Sean and Erik: What?! Linus: What did we just walk in to? Me: That's very concerning Kevin: How did that happen? 8. Bonham’s noodling around one day in the studio with you and QR for your collaboration when she starts to play Clarinet Candy (available on request). When she pauses, Kevin says, “Jesus those are some fast notes.” She smiles and says, “I got the fastest tongue in the West. That came out wrong.” How do you, Kevin, Carlos, Rudy, and Frankie respond? Kevin and Frankie are laughing. Carlos: Want to put that tongue to good use? Me: Carlos! Rudy: Carlos, don't be a creep. 9. You’re on the set of Game Grumps with Bonham one day waiting for the final cut before uploading when Arin and Danny ask you, “Have you ever played fire truck?” You tell them no and they both get excited. “This’ll be funny, Shelby hasn’t either.” They sit each of you down in chairs, and Arin kneels in front of you while Danny kneels in front of her. “Alright,” Arin explains. “This is how it works.” He puts a hand on your ankle, and Danny does the same to Shelby. “Our hands are the fire trucks, and your legs are the streets. When you want us to stop, you say red light. Got it?” You both say yes, so they both slowly begin moving their hands up your legs. Arin gets just above your knee when you say red light. He giggles a little before saying “Fire trucks don’t stop for red lights.” and keeps moving his hand. How do you react? How does Shelby react to the game? What do the Grumps say when you’re done? Me: If you don't take your hand off my thigh right now I'm kicking you in the jewels. Arin jumps up and pouts before saying, "You're no fun." Bons makes it a little longer but then accidentally kicks Danny. While Danny is on the floor he goes, "...this may not have been our best idea." 10. You and Bonham Meet Kevin and Rudy in the studio one day and Kevin looks to be in distress. “What’s wrong, man? I haven’t seen you this devastated since I told you Candy Land isn’t a real country.” Bonham says. How do they respond, and what’s the cause of the distress? Me: Really Kevin He thought I was super pissed at him over something. 11. You and Kevin and Sean are hanging out one day and Bonham’s got music going. A nice bass solo comes in and she says, “I’m always a slut for a kickass rock and roll bass line.” “Is that why you’re such a virgin at songwriting?” Kevin asks. How do you, Bonham, and Sean respond? Bons: I will punch you in the face and not regret it. Sean: Hah, nice one Me: Kevin, don't be an ass. 12. You’re dating Duff since you and Kevin broke up a while back, and you two are on a date one day. You’re having a ncie time when you see Bonham walk in. She walks over and says hi. “What are you dong here man? You wanna join us?” Duff says. “Oh, no thanks, I’m actually meeting somebody here.” she says. He asks who she’s meeting but just at that moment, Kevin walks up and says, “Hey babe.” before kissing her. Turns out that’s who she’s meeting. Duff suspects he’s doing this just to try to get to you. How do you and Duff react, and what do all four of you say when the kiss breaks? We both smile and I go, "Good for you guys! I hope you have a good date. Bons I'll see you at home you gotta tell me all about it." Kevin blinks and Bons goes, "I told you your idiotic plan wouldn't work. Now I have to go home to wash my mouth out with soap. Blegh." She leaves Kevin standing there with a bright red face looking stupid. 13. In the studio for your collab with QR, Kevin keeps picking on Bonham’s sax part. “You need more vibrato, you sound automated.” he keeps telling her. At one point she looks at him and says, “You want vibrato? I’ll give you fucking vibrato.” She takes a breath, and as she plays her note she shakes her instrument, producing a disgustingly shaky sound out of anger. How does Kevin respond, and what do you and the rest of QR say? Kevin: Well...not that. Me: My ears Rudy: Jesus Randy: You alright there, babe? Drew: Jesus I think you blew out my ear drum. 14. After Rudy and Bonham break up, Sean is antsier than usual during rehearsal; so much so that you pull him aside and ask him about it. Instead of telling you why he’s antsy, he says, “I need to ask you something, as my friend and as my boss. I want to date Bonham, but I know that that’s fucked with your lineup in the past. I want to know if you’ll give me permission to. I’m not leaving the band, whatever happens.” What do you tell him? How does he respond? Me: I don't think that's a good idea. You work together and you're also ten years younger than her. Sean: I respect your decision and won't pursue a relationship with Bonham but age is just a number you know. -------------------- 1. You and your singer let Tommy, Nikki, and Vince stay with you guys after they were evicted from their apartment. One day, you and your singer come back to find burned footprints in the carpet and you find Nikki standing in the middle of your singer's bedroom with his thigh high boots on fire and Tommy and Vince looking at him. "Jesus fucking Christ!" Your singer screams, she goes to get the fire extinguisher and Nikki steps closer to her records. She screams, "Step away from the records." Before blasting him with the fire extinguisher. "What the fuck were the three of you doing? Why are there burned footprints on our carpet?" You ask. How do Tommy, Nikki, and Vince respond and what do you and your singer say? 2. Your singer has been debating about dying we hair for weeks. She finally does it and when she comes out to you and Kevin before she drys it kevin goes, "Did the dye even take to your hair?" How do you and your singer respond? 3. Your singer comes to a rehearsal for you and your joint tour with Crüe. She brings along this guy and she introduces him as Mick. "This is Mick. He's a good friend." She then introduces him to you guys and she stops at Mick and says "And this is Mick Mars. He is where you got your nickname from." How do you, Mick, Tommy, Nikki, and Vince respond? 4. Your manager thought it would be a great idea to put you on one of those tidying shows for publicity. The lady comes to help you clean and she makes a beeline for you and your singer's records in the living room and starts talking about pairing them down. Your singer says, "If you lay a hand on our records I will fucking cut you. Don't fucking touch them." How do you and the cleaning lady respond? 5. You and Kevin are at a bar. Your singer is with you and Kevin has a huge crush on her (but he hasn't asked her out yet). You just roll your eyes and say, "Go talk to her." He gives you a look and goes, "Are you crazy? "I can't talk to her. She's got that "don't fuck with me" attitude all over her." Your singer comes over and goes, "Who had "don't fuck with me" all over them?" How do you and Kevin respond? 6. You and your singer are on a public plane with Crüe to get to one of your concerts. All of a sudden you hear Panama by Van Halen playing over the speakers and David Lee Roth comes walking down the plane aisle like Jesus and Michael, Alex, and Eddie are close behind them. Your singer runs to Nikki next to her and goes, "Jesus are they full of themselves. We came on like normal people." She says this loud enough for David to hear. How does David respond and what do you, Nikki, your singer, Mick say? 7. You, Sean, Kevin, and Rudy are helping your singer's family set up for her aunts memorial. You're looking through pictures to put in frames when Rudy pulls out a photo of her and her cousin and says, "Aww you looked so adorable as a little kid." Sean pulls it out of Rudy's hand and looks at it before saying, "If you think playing tug of war like a dog is adorable." How do you, your singer, Kevin, and Rudy respond? 8. You and Rudy are helping your singer clean out your and her kitchen and Rudy is rifling through some junk drawers. He pulls out an old zippo lighter and asks her, "Why do you have an old, rusty zippo lighter? It's junk." Your singer grabs it from him and goes, "Don't throw it out! It was my aunt's and it reminds me of her." How do you and Rudy respond? 9. You and your band are taking a break from recording and Sean has his laptop out. All of a sudden he says, "People ship our band weirdly." When you ask what he means, he turns his computer towards you and your singer and you find a detailed orgy fic of your band. How do you, your singer, Erik, and Linus respond? 10. You and your singer are in line with Kevin at a famous soup kitchen in New York. The owner is called the soup nazi but you have no idea why. Your singer goes to order and she's about to say something and she stumbles over the soup. The chef slams his soup spoon on the counter and screams, "No soup for you!" How do you, Kevin, and your singer respond? 11. You, Sean, and Kevin are sitting on the couch watching a movie when your singer storms into the living room, throws a box at Sean and goes, "Stop hiding your coke in a fucking candy box, Sean. I don't want my kids eating it. If I find that you haven't kicked the coke habit by the new year, the band is putting you in rehab. Because this is getting ridiculous." How do you, Sean, and Kevin respond? 12. Your band ends up putting Sean into rehab and on the first group therapy session you can tell Sean has a lot of resentment towards your singer. How does the therapy session go and what do you, your singer, Erik, Linus, and Kevin say to Sean about his drug use? @osbournebemydaddy Your turn Bons :)

[mudstoneabyss]

nobody asked for this but shares it anyway. I think part of Carlos's trauma and negative associations with the desert otherworld is because he did have an affair with Kevin. I think it was at a point in time where he'd already been in there for years without finding a way out and during a period of months where he wasn't hearing from Cecil at all- I don't think the time difference between the otherworld and night vale is an equal ratio, so while Cecil contacted Carlos every day, Carlos would go days to weeks to months without hearing from him- which was the longest period without contact in all those ten years, so he, in a depressed state, kind of convinced himself that he wouldn't ever find a way back and be with Cecil again. Fuck, night vales dangerous, for all he knew Cecil may have stopped contacting him because he was dead. so he became set on making his life in the otherworld now, and there he was, and there Kevin was, the only other person close, someone he had now known for a longer period of time than he's known Cecil, already so unsubtle about his crush on him, and so, so easy to imagine that he was almost Cecil. It wasn't something that was immediately intense and spur of the moment, there was lingered touches and flirting and multiple conscious decisions leading towards an unspoken committed relationship. And I think Carlos did love Kevin, not as much as he loved Cecil, and not the way he loved Cecil, but he did. And I think that that love was tainted by guilt and shame that makes me feel like Carlos never could've stayed in the otherworld or brought Kevin back to night vale without it being detrimental to his mental health. I also think it's why he said the things that he did the way that he did before leaving Kevin, and why he doesn't contact him at all or, when telling Nilanjana things about his time in the Otherworld that he wouldn't even tell Cecil, he never mentions Kevin at all, and in fact iirc says that he was alone despite us knowing he wasn't. Also I think it could explain why he doesn't tell Cecil about how long he really was in there, and why Kevin was so certain that Carlos was talking about Cecil instead of him before leaving, that Carlos felt the same he did

edit: some more things I'm adding, "Maybe you both would be better off doing what you love, in different places. Without each other. Maybe neither of you were as happy as either of you thought." Is like. That's literally a breakup, Carlos does say that he "spent the last year all wrong" which could mean less my thoughts on the time frame for this and more he and Kevin weren't a thing until that year of the ten, but I think it could also be that finknor hadn't come up with it actually being 10 years yet, or maybe that year they started building a home with each other which is what made Carlos start feeling especially worse about their relationship.

Kevin is also super unsubtle about flirting with Carlos "Look at how we both notice things about each other! I love that!" especially is very "Aw look how cute we are together I love that about us <3", "Oh, and speaking of sunshine, Carlos just arrived here, live in the studio with me." is him calling Carlos sunshine & he says "with me" all "🥰🫀😍💛" and "People like me, and like my friend Carlos. He's a scientist. He's a beautiful man who does beautiful things." is him openly calling Carlos beautiful while on the phone with him and the way he says "my friend Carlos" is very suggestive- again whilst on the phone with him. He's also very open about the disdain in his voice when he refers to Cecil as Carlos's boyfriend. All this could be just him being unsubtle about a crush, but Kevin is typically better at hiding the true emotions in his words, at least at this point in podcast. he is also openly very flirtatious with Charles before they were dating technically, but at that point Charles had already shown he was interested (from the way Kevin described them meeting) so I think thatd show more that Carlos had in some way reciprocated interested in Kevin than that Kevin is Like That with crushes in general

[classic-rock-roller]

1. For your group cover of Buried Alive, Sean was given the opportunity to do the mallet percussion (marimbas and xylophones and such), and he gladly accepted. In the studio, you’re all marveling at his setup (you, your band, NSP + Arin, and QR). Bonham walks behind one of the vibraphones and Sean says to her, “Bons, sing me a song on your xylophone machine.” She picks up a mallet and very deliberately hits one singular note without drawing the mallet back, resulting in a metallic thump. Who stuck around to look at the setup, and what do they all say in reaction to her “song”?

Danny, I, Rudy, and Sean stuck around for her song. Carlos and Frankie were tussling on the floor. Erik and Linus were setting up their instruments. Arin was talking to Suzy and Kevin tried to get me to come to the bathroom with him but I said no so he went on his own. 

Me: Pretty cool. 

Rudy and Dan are talking so they haven’t said anything yet besides trading notes about bass playing. 

Sean: That sounded great!

2. You and Bonham are in the Game Grumps studio after you’re finished filming the Power Hour, and you’re talking with Dan and Arin. Arin is describing a difficult game they’re playing, and has a screencap of it on his phone and is asking Dan for advice. “Dude, I think you need to go down under there.” Dan says. “Down Under? I love that song!” Bonham says. “Yeah, it’s great.” Arin says, and proceeds to sing it like this. Bonham laughs, thinking it’s funny. How do you and Danny respond?

Me: Oh my god, my ears. 

Danny is laughing hysterically. 

3. You, Bonham, Sean, and Kevin were invited to do Table Flip with the Game Grumps. You’ll be playing Cards Against Humanity. The game is going well until about halfway through. Bonham says, “Man, I’m losing something fierce.” Danny says, “If you want to start winning we could add the Strip rules.” How does she respond and what do the rest of you say? (you, Sean, Kevin, Arin, Danny, Suzy, Barrry, Ross)

Bons: Sure!

Me: I’m good. I’ll leave the room if you do since you know no spectators. 

Kevin *already unzipping his pants*: I love a good game of strip cards. 

Sean is blushing a deep red color. 

Danny: Oh my god, Kevin. Put your pants back on. 

Arin: What did you expect him to do when you suggested strip cards?

Suzy, Barry, and Ross are kind of just surprised by how crazy the three of us can be and I vault over the table and tackle Kevin to keep him from pulling off his pants. (because MOST of the time he wears nothing underneath) 

4. Your band is onstage one night and for one of your songs you let Bonham have an extended solo so the rest of you can have a break. She walks forward to center stage and gets through about four bars before there’s a weird creaking overhead. You all think nothing of it, until a stage light comes crashing down, taking Bonham with it. What happens next and how does everyone react?

I scream, “Oh my god!” And run out to her while our manager is screaming at me not to be stupid because another light may fall. I push the light off her and make sure she’s still breathing while Sean calls 911. She ends up being fine just bad burns from the light and a broken leg. I stay with her in the hospital until she wakes up and makes sure to make her feel better because the burns really hurt and she’s got fish skin on her arms and leg which she doesn’t understand and I have to explain to her. 

5. You get home one day to find Bonham sleeping on the dog bed in the living room. “What are you doing?” you ask. She says, “The dog is in my bed, so I left her there.” How do you respond?

“Aww, that’s adorable. But couldn’t you have squeezed in with her?”

6. Sean and Bonham are playing Super Smash Bros. one day, with you and Kevin watching. Bonham’s beating his ass, and he’s pissed. “This doesn’t make sense, I know all the combos,” he says. Bonham laughs a little and says, “But the combos are useless against BUTTON MASHING!!!” before spamming a single button and winning the match. How does Sean react and how do you and Kevin respond?

Sean: “Seriously?!” 

Kevin: Never play against Bons, she always wins. 

Me: Yup, she always does. 

7. You and Sean and Kevin are watching Bonham play Paper Mario one day, and she’s gotten to the final boss, the Shadow Queen. The Queen is monologuing, and in it she says, “I shall punish you.” Bonham responds with, “Ooh, spank me daddy.” That’s weird and you all know it. How do you all respond?

Kevin *looking towards me*: You should call me daddy. 

Me: Gasps (covers Sean’s ears) There are children present! And no I will not call you that its gross. 

Sean: You know I’m like 24 right? But still...ewwww

8. You’re in the car with Bonham and Chuck one day, when you come upon a magnet-driving bus. Chuck is driving, and the bus is sticking right next to him. He takes a big breath and grips the steering wheel tightly. “What’s up, you nervous?” you ask him. He shrieks, “I HAVE A FEAR OF BEING ALONGSIDE BUSES!” How do you and Bonham respond?

Me: Really? It’s just a bus. what could happen?

Bons: It’s a bus. You’re fine. 

9. You and Bonham are in the Game Grumps studio after filming the power hour. You slip away to grab a drink from the fridge, and when you get back, you see Bonham and Dan dancing like this to that song and Arin is filming it on his phone. When they finish, you ask, “What are you doing?” Arin responds, “We’re making a video for tha ‘Gram.” (Instagram). How do Bonham and Dan respond and what do you say?

Dan and Bons are laughing hysterically while doing it and I roll my eyes, “Do people seriously like watching this?” Bons and Dan pull me in then and go, “Come on stop being a sourpuss.” I slowly start dancing with them and I laugh along with them. 

10. You’re in the Game Grumps studio hanging out waiting for editing to finish up so you can see the final cut, and when Bonham went to get her lunch from the fridge, Danny and Arin got into her phone and are scrolling through her pictures/videos. You hear Danny say, “Holy shit, you gotta see this!” You go over to see what they found, and it’s an old video from when Bonham was in high school. It’s her choir doing a performance of The Rose (originally by Bette Midler), and she’s soloing. “I didn't know she used to sing, what happened?” Danny asks. “What are you doing?” Bonham has returned with her food. What do you, Arin, and Danny say?

Arin: You were so good! Why did you stop? 

Danny: Yeah, why did you stop singing? 

Me: She still does. On a lot of our early records, we shared singing and we did duets together. And she still does now. We just don’t do duets as much. I don’t know why we just don’t. For some reason, only one song that we dueted on ever broke into popular music. You have to really listen to our whole albums to hear the rest of her’s but they’re some of my favorites.  

11. Your band is doing a one-time-only live performance of your song with NSP for a talk show. You’re all ready to go on, but Sean is nowhere to be found. You all go to his dressing room to find it locked. Bonham knocks angrily and says, “What are you doing, come on!” Sean answers with, “Uh, I’m masturbating, like, furiously right now, so you’re going to have to wait.” How do you, Erik, Linus, and Danny respond?

I bang on the door, “Fucking seriously Sean Robert Parsons! You can’t keep it in your pants for another two hours!”

Erik and Linus are stifling giggles until I glare at them. 

Danny: Boy you’re angry, breaking out the middle AND last name. 

I bang on the door again and say, “You better fucking quit it right now or so help me god. I will barge my way in there and fucking pull you out. It’s nothing I haven't seen before.” 

Danny: What?!

Me: I live with Kevin remember. 

Sean opens the door then and goes, “Jesus ok.” 

_____________________

1) Your singer has gotten really drunk at one of Quiet Riot’s concerts. You’re trying to keep her from doing something stupid but she slips away from you. The next thing you hear is “Kevie!” and you see your singer wrapped in Kevin’s arms onstage and kissing him passionately. (luckily it wasn’t during a song). The crowd erupts in roars and wolf whistles. What does Kevin say to the crowd after they finish kissing and how do Carlos, Frankie, and Rudy respond? Do you drag your singer offstage?

2) You, your singer, your band, and Crüe are in a bar and all gathered around Tommy and your singer. There are several overturned shot glasses on the table and several other spectators. Tommy grabs one of the last shots and takes it before turning it over and going, “Your turn.” Your singer downs her second to last shot and then Tommy drinks his before promptly running to the bathroom. Your singer downs hers easily. How do you, Erik, Sean, Linus, Vince, Nikki, and Mick respond?

3) Your singer is exhausted from taking care of a two-year-old and a newborn after your band comes back from your hiatus. Sean is doing things to piss her off like going, “You missed coming in there by a quarter of a second.” Your singer gives him the look and both Erik and Linus visibly shrink back. “What’s that look for? You just look confused and constipated,” Sean asks. Your singer gets up in his face and goes, “This is my ‘you pissed me off face’...learn it well. For it will be the last thing you see before you’re shoved out of rehearsal for the rest of the day. Got it? I love you dearly but don’t fucking piss me off when I’m exhausted. You won’t like me then.” Just then newborn Eddie leaves out a piercing cry and Mal goes, “Mommy!” Your singer closes her eyes and huffs through her nose, “Coming, loves!” How do you, Sean, Erik, and Linus respond?

4) You are on the Power Hour with Dan and Arin and you’re talking about the many times your singer has punched assholes. Arin goes, “You need anger management.” Your singer looks at him and says, “I have anger management. It’s cursing you out in my head and then screaming to Cinderella n the drive home.” She then gives him a smirk, “Works every time.” How do you, Dan, and Arin respond?

5) You and your singer are on the Ten Minute Power Hour with Arin and Dan (she actually came to this one). While sitting at their table and working on projects, Danny sneezes, “You have cute, tiny kitten sneezes, Danny,” your singer says. How do you, Arin, and Dan respond?

6) You are with Arin and Danny while they practice axe throwing and Danny gets two axes stuck in the board, he turns around and screams, “I am a god!” Your singer says from behind her book, “Of curly hair, chips, and tripping over one's feet maybe.” Danny goes to her, “Why don’t you try then?” “Ok,” she places down her book and grabs the ax from him. She throws it and it hits dead center. I told you not to bet against me. It’s like throwing a switchblade,” she says as she hands him back the ax. How do you, Dan, Arin, and their cameraman Tucker respond?

7) You and your singer are on the Power Hour with Danny and Arin and your singer is off to the side getting something. When she hands it to Danny, he tries to give her a bug but she says, “Don’t hug me.” Danny says, “Aww, come on. Arin! Get over here! We have to hug Miss Sourpuss.” They envelope her in a hug between the two of them and Arin goes, “Aww, look an adorable carrot sandwich.” Your singer, squished between the two of them, goes, “I hate this,” and mouths to you, “HELP ME!” At that moment, Kevin barges in and goes, “HELLO! WHAT ARE WE DOING?!” Tucker goes, “I tried to stop him but he’s strong.” How do you, Arin, Dan, and Kevin respond to the hug and how do you, Dan, Arin, and your singer respond to Kevin?

8) You, Rudy, and Rudy’s brother, Robert, are behind some young teenage guys in line in a record store when you see one of them point out your band's new record with a picture of your band on the front of it and go, “That band’s weird because they’re singer is bi. I bet she’s slept with every member of their band and will die in a few years. She’s a whore and a slut.” You look over to Robert and he looks like he’s about to blow a gasket, “You boys better stop talking about her like that.” They turn around and the other boy goes, “Why? Because you’re her boyfriend, and you’re her bandmate, and you’re her friend? Big fucking deal. I can talk shit about her all I want. She’s a freak and I won’t be surprised if she’s murdered in a couple of months.” How do you, Rudy, and Robert respond?

9)  You and your singer are trying to get a very drunk Rudy and drunk Kevin home. You get the four of you into a cab and the cabby asks, “Where to?” Kevin screams, “Cocaine!” Your singer goes “No, No! We’d like to go back to our hotel please.” And she gives him the address. How do you and Rudy respond to Kevin?

10) You, Rudy, Kevin, and your singer went out to dinner and Kevin had one too many to drink. While you and Rudy are driving them home, Kevin keeps kissing your singer’s neck in the back of the car. “Kevin stop that,” your singer says as she swats him away. He then pins her underneath him and drunkenly says, “I wanna plant my seed.” Your singer tries to get out from under him. How do you, Rudy, and your singer respond to Kevin?

11) You and your singer are sitting at the kitchen table working on lyrics for your new album with War Angel. Kevin comes in and looks over your lyric sheets before going, “Yeah, this is shit.” Your singer says to him, “All of your songs are about sex or our sexual exploits. At least ours have actual meaning behind them besides, “I want to bang my wife into our bed till she passes out.” How do you and Kevin respond?

@osbournebemydaddy your turn Bons :)

[dailyexo]

[NEWS] 170825 Billboard: “How EXO's 'The War' Came Together: A Song-By-Song Breakdown With the Band, Its Producers & More”

A behind-the-scenes look at what went into making summer's hottest K-pop album.

From the frenetic synths of “Going Crazy” to the dreamlike melodies of “Walk on Memories,” EXO's latest album, The War, held nothing back from fans. Pulling inspiration from funk, reggae, EDM, trap and more, then weaving it all together through top-notch production, it proved a logical progression in their sonic journey and a summer-friendly successor to the group's darker previous album, Ex'Act.

With The War, EXO topped Billboard's World Albums chart for two consecutive weeks and went on to sell over 1 million copies globally, proving that the EXO-L fandom is sticking around for the boy band's evolution.

Learn what went into the hottest K-pop album of the summer from the members themselves and some of the producers behind its hottest tracks.

“The Eve”

Mike Woods: I was one of the producers on “The Eve” which was originally titled “Black Dress.” I wrote it alongside Kevin White, Andrew Bazzi and Henry Lau. Originally the song was for Henry Lau's project, but we all felt that it going to EXO would be best for everyone as it was a perfect record for them. The sound came about from us wanting something sexy and melodic, but also performance driven. We wanted to paint a dark and mysterious vibe, hence the title “Black Dress.” We wrote the song during a writing camp for SM [Entertainment] -- we basically write one to two songs a day for about 10 days and see what we come up with. “The Eve” came about on the fourth day of the camp and only took us one day to complete, from conception of music and lyrics to the final composition. We recorded the demo for the song the same day of conception.

“Ko Ko Bop”

Styalz Fuego: I went out to Seoul early November last year. It was maybe 10 of us ... and basically we were all put in the the SM studios for a couple of weeks. It was my first time out there. [You're] basically hearing a quick [overview] of the whole scene and everything that's going on in K-pop and then you're put in the rooms every day to just write songs. “Ko Ko Bop” was maybe the fourth of fifth day in. The first couple of days I was trying to get a hang of [it.] I listened to a lot of K-pop, but still, it's a different scene to write a song [for] because it's so much more complex. [K-pop songs] have so many more moving components to them, than say, if you're out in L.A. writing, trying to make things very simple and trying to get to the core of the lyric and have the beat as simple as possible.

I kinda knew as soon as we'd done the song and we played it back for everyone, just from the response we got to the song it was gonna be something, but I had no idea it'd be [EXO's]. Going into writing that song, it was basically to do something with the reggae feel, that was the main thing we were aiming for. It took a whole different direction with the crazy drop section after the chorus. We went into this doing a reggae-pop song and it transformed into what it is.

I don't think it was ever for EXO -- I think it was more for a female group. Shaylen [Carroll, co-producer] did the demo. When they did the playback for everyone at SM, [we thought] they would essentially understand this is for one of the girl groups. A girl is singing it and it's in the range of what the girls can sing. The song was actually in a higher key -- I think three semitones higher -- so it was more fitted for a female [group] originally.

But I guess it worked out well because we had a few of our voices in the song spread out, so I guess when they started picking where the song could go, it made sense for EXO because there are so many different sections vocally.

Shaylen Carroll: I wrote the lyrics and melodies with Tay Jasper, then I sang the demo. It's a “feel good” type of track, so the melodies came easily. Styalz's stuff is easy to write to. When I was recording some melody ideas I kept on singing nonsense phrases and one was “Shimmy shimmy Ko Ko Bop,” which we all thought was super quirky and catchy. So we built off that and turned it into something real. The song is about not worrying about things... Sometimes you just gotta go with the flow! Don't worry about the haters.

Jared Cotter, Shaylen's manager: [SM Entertainment] let us know it was being considered for a girl group.

Carroll: [I] definitely never thought it would get flipped to EXO, but obviously we are thrilled it did. We [knew] it was special when we finished it. I am really glad it found the home that it did.

Chen: [The members and I] wrote the lyrics separately and worked on putting the lyrics together for the song afterwards. We worked on the song using a special method, where we gathered all three of our lyrics for the song and selected which lyrics would suit the song the best. I don't think I have any regrets or wish that it could have better since it's the best result produced through all the effort that our members and other various writers have put into the process. Through the lyrics, I wanted “Ko Ko Bop” to have people shake off all their stress and enjoy themselves just as who they are.

Baekhyun: I felt that a lot of our fans were unable to fully enjoy our concerts or performances because they're conscious of what others would think. Since “Ko Ko Bop” is a reggae and EDM genre and it's easy to groove to, I wanted my lyrics to have people to become more carefree, release their stress and dance away with the music.

“What U Do?”

Ronny Svendsen: The song was written in Seoul last December. We went over to Korea to do a camp for SM with our, at the time, new publishing company called Ekko Music Rights. We tried to create a song that would be danceable and organic sounding with emphasis on real instruments -- bass, guitar, piano. The song was really based around the guitars and a simple chord progression. Sound-wise we had a reference from another boy band of SM Entertainment's called NCT, which we originally aimed for: danceable, but not “synthy.”

“Forever”

Greg Bonnick of LDN NOISE: This was written in Seoul with Kenzie and Adrian McKinnon. We knew the vibe was perfect for EXO so we worked on it for about a week on and off to get it right, trying different chords and toplines. The intro part was initially the chorus. We thought, “Great, we nailed it,” but once we listened back, it needed to go up another gear. We then added the extra section, which is now the chorus, and it came to life and made it so much bigger.

To be honest, we wanted to make a “Monster” 2.0 but still be different and bigger, you know? We always have fun when we can mix hard hip-hop verses with a bright chorus, and for a group like EXO, it gives it the perfect balance.

We wanted to make a statement: this song, this album, it's EXO forever. We feel really connected to this group and the fans so it's important we got it right, and the feedback has been amazing, so we are very happy.

“Touch It”

Denzil Remedios: From what I recall, “Touch It” came to Ryan [Jhun]'s hands first. He got the song originally from the Jackie Boyz [Carlos and Steven Battey] and the Fliptonez. I think they sent it to him while we were still in Korea and this was actually more than a year ago now, maybe close to almost two years ago when they sent that record, and it just kinda connected right away. We heard what it could be -- it already sounded like the guts of a smash was there, at least something we could put into a big group's hands. From there, Ryan and I did what we normally do, which is pick it apart and say, “Hey, what parts could get stronger? What could we do extra with the production to pump it a little bit more?” That's how we got the record, and then we just worked on all those elements over probably months back and forth.

“Touch It,” when we first heard it, already had such a non-today-ish vibe -- a classic vibe. It's not like the everyday pop EDM electronic-y sound that everyone's doing, which was refreshing when we first heard it. We were like, “Yo, this sounds like an old Justin Timberlake, almost Michael Jackson type of thing.” That old school vibe. We didn't wanna change the production or toplining to the point where it didn't sound like that anymore. When we were hearing it, sonically we were like, “Cool, this can be something that a group like EXO can take and use for the album and it doesn't sound like everything else they would normally be putting out.”

We were thinking stage performance at the time too. It's just a really fun track that doesn't have to be too serious -- you don't have to have crazy choreography where they drop from the top of the stadium.

Chen: My imagination provides the most inspiration for the lyrics. For “Touch It,” I played out the lyrics in my mind as if it is like a scene from a movie when writing it. After completing the draft, I worked on it by fixing awkward pronunciations by singing along the lyrics with the music. This helped me figure out more suitable and comfortable words that would enhance the groove when listening to the song.

“Chill”

Otha “Vakseen” Davis: We went to a song camp last year -- I wanna say it was November -- and it was probably the third camp my team has been on. Anytime we go to song camps at SM, they usually have a focus for us as far as what to work on and I know we worked on some things for EXO. For any creator, you always wanna try to make an EXO project. We fell in love with the vibe and the energy[of “Chill”] in the studio and SM's team felt the same way about the record. That happened to be one that everybody loved -- the guys loved it ultimately when they heard it.

There were certain elements like the breakdown in “Chill” that was added at the camp, but we came with the ideas already fleshed out. Ultimately, [the breakdown] was to serve as a dance breakdown. K-pop acts, especially EXO, are very performance-oriented, so you wanna have sections to show out. You wanna make something that feels good but still can allow them to move.

Chanyeol: Usually it's common to work on the lyrics based on a demo guide, but for the song “Chill” I worked on the lyrics with an empty track without demo lyrics. I think that’s part of the reason why the lyrics were able to come out pretty naturally.

“Walk on Memories”

Albi Albertsson: In late 2015, Wassily Gradovsky, who was actually interning for me as a producer at that time, brought an instrumental to me, which was later to become the instrumental for “Walk on Memories.” He had recorded a loop on the upright piano I have in my living room and incorporated it into this smooth R&B style beat.

I immediately liked the chord progression and the vibe of the track, so I sent it to Justin Reinstein, a writer from New York who we had just started working with at that time. He had a very smooth topline and vocal style that I thought would be perfect for this track, so he worked on the instrumental to craft the melodies.

From then on it was only finalizing the song: I added stacks of vocal harmonies and other details to make it work better for a group performance and make it more “K-pop,” added some vocal adlibs and then finalized the production by adding more instruments and finalizing the mix.

When I sent it to EXO's A&R, he immediately loved it but wanted a more distinct intro that reflected the fantasy theme he had in mind for the new album. So instead of the very basic intro the track originally had, I came up with a new, more mysterious and vibey intro, which is the intro you can hear in the final version of the song.

Wassily Gradovsky: The track was influenced by the genres of '90s R&B and jazz, reimagined with contemporary sounds. The arrangement of the piano chords -- being arpeggiated from bottom to the top -- was inspired by Justin Timberlake's “Cry Me A River,” but with a lighter and more positive tone. The slightly melancholic bridge, which is modulating into the final uplifting chorus, represents an uplifting, “happy ending” twist to the story.

“Going Crazy”

Otha “Vakseen” Davis: It was something that we did maybe around February of 2016. They loved it and for some reason could not find the right topline for it -- I think they had one originally and it didn't work at the end of the day. So they had this track, it was already placed on EXO and my team was presented with the opportunity to write to it. So I had one of my writers go in and do what he does. Funny enough, it was supposed to go on the Ex'Act album. It was something that they loved, but it didn't make sense then. We were persistent. Between myself and my business partner, we [would say], “Hey, what about this one? Don't forget this record!” Fast forward to now, the new album was coming out, [and] we were finally able to get them to connect. I think we had to make a couple of edits on it between that year or so passing just to make sure it was as fresh as possible.

The track's over a year old -- there's something so special about it because you drop it now, 2017, and it's still hot, still relevant. And that's the goal: create timeless music that can be good any time.

Credit: Billboard.

[junker-town]

The start of Western Illinois’ NCAA tournament run in Year 20, continued

We pick up with the Leathernecks facing No. 5 Minnesota in the first round of the NCAA tournament in our College Hoops 2K8 sim.

Welcome back to our simulated dynasty with the Western Illinois Leathernecks in College Hoops 2K8. You can find a full explanation of this project + spoiler-free links to previous seasons here. Check out the introduction to this series from early April for full context. As a reminder, I simulate every game in this series (even the ones we watch on Twitch) and only handle the recruiting and coaching strategies.

We pick up with Western Illinois in the first round of the 2027 NCAA tournament. Here’s a recap of everything that has happened so far this season:

Western Illinois entered the season seeking redemption after losing to Cal in the first round of the NCAA tournament last year. We began the new season rated as a 96 overall with three new starters. We went 3-6 against a difficult non-conference schedule before sweeping the Summit League and again capturing the conference tournament championship.

We enter the tournament as a No. 12 seed. Our opponent in the first round is No. 5 seed Minnesota.

We recruited for one scholarship and are in position to land five-star JUCO shooting guard Edwin Wolfe in the spring.

READ: Western Illinois, Year 20, 2026-2027

Here’s a look at our roster heading into the 2027 NCAA tournament:

Not going to lie, there’s some real pressure heading into this tournament run in my 20th season as head coach at Western Illinois. We saw our season end in the Elite Eight in Year 16, Year 17, and Year 18. We lost in the first round last season. While I already have a strong case as the greatest mid-major coach in college basketball history, we all know this is a “what have you done for me lately” culture. It will be so hard to face the fanbase if we bow out early again.

Unfortunately, our shaky non-conference slate means we got a raw deal by the selection committee. It’s going to be a tough road through the bracket for us as a No. 12 seed, and it starts against a talented Minnesota team. Both teams enter the game rated as a 98 overall.

Minnesota is real good — you can check out the Golden Gophers’ roster here. Their senior shooting guard Carlos Klatsky is rated as a 95 overall — only four players are rated higher entering the tournament — and he’s matched up against our redshirt freshman Mathew Alloway. Their front court is stacked. Their five best players are either juniors or seniors. I am expecting this to be tough as hell.

The one thing giving me confidence is how we performed in the regular season against No. 1 Louisville in a game we watched together on Twitch. We gave the Cards all they could handle in a true road game before losing in the end. I love our inside-outside combination with senior small forward Wilky Henry and junior power forward Allan Cunningham. I trust our guards more than I did last year. While we have struggled in quick sim games, the pieces on this squad fit together better when we watch full games together on Twitch, I think. We need to take care of the ball, dominate the glass, and hopefully get a stellar performance from Henry as our go-to option on the perimeter.

We streamed this game on Twitch on Sunday night. As always, I’m not controlling Western Illinois; we’re watching a simulated game played by the computer. I’m not playing any of the games in this series, I only do the recruiting and set the coaching strategies. We did do something new this year, though: for the first time, I’m allowing myself to make in-game substitutions. Why not? There’s too much pressure to let poor rotation choices cost us.

The game should begin when you press play. Let’s go!

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Win, 89-72! We’re onto the round of 32 where we will face No. 4 seed Ole Miss.

“SECOND HALF TEAM” has become a rallying cry for our Leathernecks during the Twitch chat, and it paid off once again. Thank the heavens, because that first half was tense. Our defense looked good, but Minnesota was still matching baskets with us the entire way. We couldn’t get anything going from three-point range early. I was wondering who was going to step up to be the hero, but instead the whole team pretty much raised its level of play in the second half.

A few shout-outs:

Wilky Henry was outstanding — he was up to 24 points on the night when we pulled the starters with about five minutes remaining. Henry didn’t do anything in our first round tournament loss to Cal last year (7 points in 33 minutes), so it was great to see him splashing threes and using his size (6’8, 240+ pounds) to bully people at the rim. That is exactly the type of performance we need out of him to keep winning.

Allan Cunningham is simply an all-time Stream Team performer. Dude is so big (6’11, 290 pounds) but still so graceful, and has three-point touch to match. For all the praise we give Ham — read our beat writer Matthew Morrow on Cunningham coming into the season — we often overlook his passing ability. Not anymore: Ham was dropping dimes like a vintage Chris Webber in this one, beating constant double-teams in the second half by kicking out to open shooters. Beautiful stuff.

Our center Pat Giddens has been generally maligned by the fanbase for being too short (6’9) and too overweight (close to 300 pounds), but he’s also the highest rated junior in the NCAA tournament. I was waiting for his production to match his ratings, and it finally happened. Giddens looks formidable offensively and held his own protecting the rim. Good stuff — we need more of that is we want to keep winning.

Reader Abby blessed us with clips from the win. My favorites: this three-pointer from Silky Wilky:

Manual subs! Featuring a Cunningham steal and finish:

Nice block by backup center Kevin Brazzle + a knockdown jumper from freshman guard Mathew Alloway:

Bring on Ole Miss.

No. 12 Western Illinois vs. No. 4 Ole Miss, round of 32, 2027 NCAA tournament

Another tough matchup for our Leathernecks. Ole Miss enters the game as a 99 overall, which is one point higher than us. They have five players rated in the 90s, though most of their talent is in the backcourt and on the wing rather than in the front court. Here’s a look at the roster:

We need Cunningham and Giddens to eat inside. Waiting for us in the Sweet 16 would be a matchup with top-seeded Dayton, who are led by junior big man Matt Boswell, the player we created for the first-ever winner of our bracket contest. That would be such a fun game.

We also streamed this game on Twitch on Sunday night. Again: we’re watching a simulated game, I’m not controlling the teams. The game should start when you press play.

LET’S GO!

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Win, 116-85! We’re going to the Sweet 16! Here are the tempo-free team stats from @akulawolf:

@SBN_Ricky not sure it's possible to be much better than this offensively pic.twitter.com/zRvek6XJfz

— Steven (@akulawolf) August 17, 2020

We just witnessed the best NCAA tournament performance in program history. Wilky Henry, have yourself a day!

Here’s what I wrote about Henry at the start of the season: “Henry needs to be a superstar this year for this team to play up to its potential.” It happened in an epic way, and we’re going to the Sweet 16 because of it. Henry was absolutely unconscious, pouring in 46 points on 10-of-16 shooting from three-point range. He shattered the program’s previous tournament scoring record of 34 points set by Kim Kone in Year 17.

Honestly, it felt like he could have scored 60 easily. We pulled the starters with 9:35 seconds left as we were up 22 points. I tried to manually sub Henry back in to get 50, but the game took him out right away. LOL. Still an unreal performance either way.

Seriously, man: 46 points on 27 shots in 26 minutes. We might never see a performance like that again in Leathernecks history. Let’s go the clips from reader Abby, starting with a three and then a dunk from Wilky:

More Wilky:

Nice pass from Wilky to point guard Tron Whaley:

Silky Wilky forever. We’re going to need him to keep going, because we’re moving onto the Sweet 16 to face No. 1 seed Dayton.

No. 12 Western Illinois vs. No. 1 Dayton, Sweet 16, 2027 NCAA tournament

Dayton enters the game as a 97 overall — we’re a 98 overall. This is how the two teams matchup:

Here’s a look at Dayton’s roster led by one-time bracket contest winner, studio host, and created baller Matt Boswell. This is going to be an all-out battle. And we’re going to watch the simulated game together on Tuesday, Aug. 18 at 8:30 p.m. ET on Twitch. Please join us.

Here’s how to watch Western Illinois vs. Dayton in the Sweet 16:

Game: No. 12 seed Western Illinois vs. No. 1 seed Dayton, Sweet 16, 2027 NCAA tournament

How to watch: My Twitch channel

Date: Tuesday, Aug. 18

Tip-off time: 8:30 p.m. ET // 7:30 p.m. CT. The stream will start a little earlier.

If we win: Elite Eight game against the winner of No. 2 Indiana vs. No. 6 Pitt will follow immediately after.

Put Lakers vs. Blazers on one screen and the Leathernecks on the other. This is going to be a blast. A few links before I get out of here:

Join the Leathernecks Reddit for continued discussion on the team. We also have a fan-started Twitter account (with spoilers of Twitch streams before the recap goes out) and Instagram page you can follow.

Reader Evan’s Leathernecks recruiting database now includes size progression over time. He wrote about it on Reddit, but it’s wild seeing some of these changes. For example: Wilky Henry has gained three inches and 43 pounds since he committed. I hope no one gives him a PED test before the Sweet 16.

We had 130 entries in the bracket contest this year. Hell yeah. Check out Sean’s Blog Team app for the current standings, which works on desktop and mobile.

Reader Thanh Nguyen wrote a fan-fiction e-book on the first eight seasons of Ricky Charisma at Western Illinois.

WESTERN ILLINOIS VS. DAYTON

SWEET 16

TUESDAY NIGHT ON TWITCH

I’LL SEE YOU THERE

GO ‘NECKS.

Would you like email updates for this series? If so, add your email to this Google Form.

[classic-rock-roller]

1. It’s really hot out and Bonham is outside doing yard work when Kevin comes over. She’s out back when he says, “Watch this, it’ll be funny.” Before you can stop him, he turns the hose on full blast and sprays her back. You both expect a startled reaction, but because it’s so hot, you see her flinch a bit before yelling out, “Fuck, do that again, this time on the front.” How do you two respond?

Me: Are you sure? You may get cold. 

Kevin: Hey, you don’t have to ask me twice. *sprays Bons again*

2. You, Bonham, Randy, Kevin, Rudy, and Crue are playing Never Have I Ever, and the subject of how many people you’ve all slept with comes up. You’re going around saying your numbers when Vince pipes up, “I’ve pulled more tail than the slow kid at a petting zoo.” How do you, Kevin, Randy, Bonham, Rudy, and the rest of Crue respond?

Me: Yes, which is why you’ve had to get more penicillin shots in the ass than anyone else. 

Nikki: And stuff your dick in a burrito to mask the scent 

Tommy: Works every time 

Randy: You guys are nasty

Kevin: That sounds like a good idea...

Bonham: Don’t get any ideas or I’ll whoop your ass 

Rudy: Yeah because you know BabyCarrot’ll kill you when she finds out. 

Mick just shakes his head 

3. Kevin’s driving you and Bonham and Randy somewhere, and somehow she ended up in shotgun with you and Randy in the back. At one point, you hear him yell, “Oh shit, hold on!” and he slams on the brakes. Instinctively, his arm flies out toward the passenger seat (since that’s where you normally are) and due to the inertia of the sudden stop, he ends up accidentally groping Bonham. How do each of you react?

Kevin, pulls hand away really fast: Oh Bons I am so sorry. 

Randy: At least you know you’ll protect the person up front 

Me: Yeah, even when it’s not me. 

Bonham: Hey that’s ok. It’s not like you tried to cop a feel on purpose. 

4. You’re with Bonham and Randy and Kevin one evening and Bonham’s mouthing off because she’s had a bad day. At one point she says something and Kevin asks her, “I beg your pardon?”She just gives him a look and says, “Then beg.” How do you, Randy, and Kevin respond?

Kevin: On please beautiful smart one. What did you say?

Randy: ...Kiss ass 

Me: Jeez Kevin 

5. Bonham has been hanging out with you and Kevin more and more after the plane crash. One night while Kevin’s rehearsing with Carlos and Co., you two end up super drunk back at the house and end up kissing. Kevin comes home and sees the whole thing, and he’s beyond pissed. After you two wake up in the morning, you see him sitting at the table with a cup of coffee. “We have to talk about this.” What happens next and what do you all say?

He explains what exactly happened (because I don’t remember from being so drunk) and ends with that he no longer wants the two of us hanging out alone. We both look at each other and I turn to Kevin. 

Me: You do realize we dated before she and I met you and Randy right? 

Kevin: No...

Bonham: Yeah we did for almost two years before we met you guys but by the time we’d met you two we were just really good friends. 

6. You and Bonham are sitting in on QR’s second album, QR II. When lunch rolls around, you and Kevin leave with Rudy and Drew while Bonham and Randy hang back so he can work on his solo in the last song and they can see if they can come up with the finishing touches to their new song “Saviours”. When you come back you hear anguished screaming coming from the room where you left them, followed by Randy saying, “Yeah, that’s beautiful, you’re doing great hon!” Startled, Kevin opens the door and you all see Bonham in the booth, screaming, and Randy sitting outside commenting. “What’s going on in here?” Drew shouts. “Oh we forgot to tell you, Ron (the producer) thought Saviours could be better if we added war cries over the drum fill.” How do you, Kevin, Rudy, and Drew respond?

Me: Thank god! I thought we’d be walking in on something we shouldn’t. 

Rudy: I expected that thought to come from Kevin, not from you. 

Drew: You’re nasty. 

Kevin: That’s my girlfriend. 

7. Your band is working on a video for “Nostalgia” and you’re all dressed as various life stages. Erik is the baby, Bonham is the kid, Linus is the teenager, you’re the adult, and Daryl is the old man. Bonham’s just got through with makeup, and she’s got pigtails and a tutu and rainbow thigh socks and a giant lollipop, and when she comes out, Kevin and Randy (who are hanging around) see and snicker a bit. “What?” Bonham asks. Kevin says, “you look ridiculous; pigtails and tattoos don’t mix.” How do you, Randy, and Bonham respond?

Bonham: Fuck off 

Me: I think she looks cute with pigtails. 

Kevin: Well, where’s your costume. 

Me: I’m wearing it. 

Randy: You’re dressed normally 

Me: Yeah, I’m not overly dressing up to be the adult unless they make me. Which they probably will. 

8. You get home one day and Kevin and Bonham are yelling at each other. You don’t know what it’s about, but it’s really heated, and when you get inside, you see that when Bonham opens her mouth the next time, you see that she’s been at it so long her mouth is bleeding. Kevin notices too, just as he sees you. How do you two react, what were they yelling about, and how does she respond?

Kevin stops immediately and goes, “Are you ok? I’m going to get you some ice and a towel.” I come up and steps and ask what’s going on. Once Kevin comes back she swats his hand away, “I don’t need your help.” But he insists and gives it to her. They were having a heated argument over not giving Rudy the credit he deserves with QR and that one day he would leave the band. 

9. You and Kevin are visiting Bonham and Chuck in Colorado, and he’s driving you all to dinner. Bonham’s got control of the radio and is playing Aerosmith’s Walk This Way. When the line “hey diddle diddle it’s the kitty in the middle” comes up, Chuck sings, “hey little kitty with your pretty kitty tiddies”. Bonham just kind of sighs. How do you and Kevin respond?

Me: Could you stop that Chuck? It’s very annoying. Sing the correct words or don't sing at all. 

Kevin: Oh come on, stop being a buzzkill. It was funny. 

10. It’s been a while since the plane crash, and Bonham’s been hanging around with you more than usual. One day when she’s not around, Kevin says to you, “We have to talk about Bonham. I don’t know if I want you hanging around with her anymore.” “What do you mean?” “You can’t tell me you haven’t noticed what’s going on. Ever since Randy died she’s been super sexual toward you and I have a feeling she’s going to do something to you when i’m not around. I’m going to confront her about it later.” What do you say and what happens when Kevin confronts her?

Me: Kev, relax. It’s her grieving process. I don’t think you remember me telling you but we dated for a couple years before we met you and Randy. And now we’re really close friends. She just needs someone to lean on for a bit. She’ll be fine then. 

When he brings this up with her, she gives him an offended look and goes, “I would never. She’s your girlfriend and I respect that.” 

11. You’re hanging out with QR and Bonham and Chuck one day when Chuck says “Y'know for rock stars you guys are all pretty cool. I thought you’d be narcissistic and vain.” Bonham laughs a little and says, “Nah, Kevin’s got enough vanity for all of us.” Kevin looks offended and says, “How dare you compare me to a counter.” How do you, Chuck, and the rest of QR respond?

Me: Kev, you’re an idiot 

Chuck bursts out laughing. 

Rudy and Drew roll their eyes. 

Randy: Kevin, Vanity is also means a person who is full of themselves...you have a lot of that. 

---------------------

1) You, Kevin, and your singer are in your singer and your apartment. You and Kevin are in the living room and your singer is in the kitchen. All of a sudden the door bangs open and Brit comes storming in before flopping down on the couch and screaming into the cushions, “I want to die!” Your singer pops her head around the kitchen wall, “Hey Brit. Rough day?” You roll your eyes and say, “Might want to try knocking next time...not that you ever do.” Kevin looks between you, your singer, and Brit, “This is a usual occurrence?!” How do you, your singer, and Brit respond?

2) While at an awards ceremony for your band and QR, Axl says something really bad about Kevin and it escalates to your singer being held back by security. Axl gets up in her face and screams, “I’m going to fucking kill you bitch.”  Your singer struggles against the security and screams back, “Yeah? Why don’t we go right fucking now?” You, Kevin, and the rest of QR see Axl visibly shrink back as security lets your singer go. How do you, Kevin, Rudy, Carlos, and Frankie respond to this screaming match? 

3) Your singer is working at her day camp job and you, Kevin, and Randy come to visit her. She’s with an almost three-year-old the entire day and when you get there, the two of them are having a yes/no argument. Kevin looks at them and goes, “Uh...hon, what are you doing?” Your singer turns to him, “What does it look like? I’m having an argument.” before she goes right back to arguing with the two-year-old. How do you, Randy, and Kevin respond?

4) You’re working on a second album with Crüe and one day you, Tommy, Nikki, and Mick come into the room to find your singer and Vince arguing over the pronunciation of motorcycle. “It’s motorcicle!” Vince yells at her. “No, it’s motorcycle. Everyone pronounces it motorcycle.” How do you and the rest of Crüe respond?

5) You’re band and Crüe are working on an album together. One day, you, Vince, Nikki, Mick, Randy, and Kevin are sitting in the recording booth when Tommy and your singer burst in. Tommy keeps singing, “You won’t do it, you won’t do it.” Your singer whirls around on him and goes, “Oh yes I will!” She walks up to you and pulls you into a kiss. She then turns to Tommy, “There. Happy now?” She then storms out of the room before you can say anything. How do you, Randy, Kevin, and Crüe respond? 

6) You and your band are working on another album with Crüe. One day you and Nikki come into the recording studio to find your singer and Mick cuddled up on the couch with Mick’s head on your singer’s shoulder and her head on top of his. Nikki giggles quietly and takes out his phone to take a picture. Without even opening her eyes your singer goes, “If you take a picture and wake Mick up I swear to god.” Nikki takes the picture and Mick stirs a little but doesn’t wake up. What does your singer say and how do you and Nikki respond?

7) Your singer has brought you over to her dorm room before you’ve started your band. You bring along Randy and the three of you plus your singer’s college friend Ryan are shoved into her dorm room. The walls are really thin so she has the door closed so that her roommate doesn’t hear you talking or the music going. She leaves the room to use the restroom and closes the door behind her before Ryan opens it back up. She whisper-yells, “Close the fucking door I don’t want to wake my roommate.” How do you, Ryan, and Randy respond?

8) You and your singer are on QR’s Metal Health tour with them. You and Kevin are talking to Rudy when all of a sudden you hear running and your singer jumps on Rudy’s back. “Hi, Rudy! Someone gave me some really good tasting stuff and now I’m full of energy and I just want to hug you!” How do you, Kevin, and Rudy respond and what was your singer given and who gave it to her? 

9) You and Kevin are sitting on the couch when your singer comes home from her teaching job. She has huge tears in her eyes about to brim over and when she gets upstairs she flops down on the couch and puts her head in Kevin’s lap before screaming really loudly. How do you and Kevin respond? 

10) Your singer is a big fan of Halloween and every year she plans a huge party. Partially for Kevin’s birthday because it’s two days before Halloween. One year while you’re decorating for the party she pulls you aside and shows you the birthday present she’s giving him. She shows you a tiny Halloween themed onesie and says she wants to surprise him. How do you respond and what happens once he opens the present at the party? 

11) You’re on tour with QR for Metal Health and you stop in your singer’s college town. While at one of the local bars, you run into one of her really good college friends Ryan. She hugs him and starts catching up and the entire time you and Rudy notice that Kevin’s getting jealous. Eventually, he goes over to her and drapes himself on her. She ignores him for a but before swatting him away. Frankie looks at you and Rudy and says, “Is that a normal occurrence between the two of them?” How do you, Rudy, and Carlos respond and what does Kevin say when he comes back? 

@osbournebemydaddy your move Bons

[mastcomm]

As Protests in South America Surged, So Did Russian Trolls on Twitter, U.S. Finds

WASHINGTON — Watching political unrest explode across South America this fall, officials at the State Department noticed an eerily similar pattern in anti-government protests that otherwise had little in common.

In Chile, nearly 10 percent of all tweets supporting protests in late October originated with Twitter accounts that had a high certainty of being linked to Russia.

In Bolivia, immediately after President Evo Morales resigned on Nov. 10, the number of tweets associated with those type of accounts spiked to more than 1,000 a day, up from fewer than five.

And in Ecuador, Peru, Bolivia, Colombia and Chile over one 30-day period, Russia-linked accounts posted strikingly similar messages within 90 minutes of one another.

State Department analysts concluded that an influence campaign was underway, the latest evidence of a global disinformation war that is more insidious and efficient than traditional propaganda of years past.

The department routinely monitors Twitter traffic worldwide with an eye toward malign activities, like the proliferation of fake pages and user accounts or content that targets the public with divisive messages. A set of analyses was provided to The New York Times in response to questions about what the department had seen during and after the fall protests in South America.

“We are noting a thumb on the scales,” said Kevin O’Reilly, the deputy assistant secretary of state overseeing issues in the Western Hemisphere. “It has made the normal dispute resolutions of a democratic society more contentious and more difficult.”

The Russian effort in South America — the details of which have not been previously reported — appears aimed at stirring dissent in states that have demanded the resignation of President Nicolás Maduro in Venezuela, senior diplomats say.

In Colombia, where Secretary of State Mike Pompeo is scheduled to visit this week, hundreds of thousands of protesters demonstrated in November against pension changes, corruption and rising violence. The protests have since ebbed, and in December, Colombia’s vice president, Marta Lucía Ramírez, accused Russia and its allies in Venezuela of fomenting protests through social network campaigns.

In Ecuador, the interior minister, María Paula Romo, said an anti-government campaign that surfaced online during two weeks of protests in October over higher fuel prices appeared to come from Venezuela and Russia.

Officials and experts say Russian influence campaigns on social media have disrupted elections in the United States and Europe, sowed anti-Western sentiment and fake news in Africa, and inspired China and Iran to adopt similar tactics against protesters and political adversaries.

The unrest in Latin America this fall cannot be attributed to any single factor, and it is unclear how effective the Russia-linked influence campaign on Twitter was. Demonstrators across the countries spanned the political spectrum, protesting government corruption and higher costs and demanding better services. State Department officials said the vast majority of protest-related posts on Twitter and other social media appeared to be legitimate.

With the support of more than 50 other countries, the Trump administration has imposed bruising economic sanctions against Mr. Maduro’s government in Venezuela over the last year. The coalition is backing Juan Guaidó, the leader of the Venezuelan opposition, whom most of Latin America and the rest of the West views as the country’s legitimate president.

But Mr. Maduro’s grip on the country appears as strong as ever, funded by what critics have described as illicit oil revenue from Russia and gold sales to Turkey.

Russia is “playing a geopolitical role in this hemisphere against what they consider its main enemy — the United States,” said Carlos Vecchio, the Venezuelan envoy in Washington who is representing the opposition movement against Mr. Maduro.

“It’s crucial that the international community understands that Russia has become an important ally to support Maduro, and we need to deal with this,” Mr. Vecchio told reporters this month.

Russia’s online influence campaigns in Latin America began to surface a decade ago, surging with new technology and the proliferation of social media.

In particular, the Spanish-language arms of two news organizations in Russia have been accused of spreading disinformation, conspiracy theories and, in some cases, outright falsehoods to undermine liberal democratic policies, mostly in the West.

One, the state-financed RT Español, says it reaches 18 million people every week across 10 countries in Latin America and has more than one billion views on YouTube. The other, the government-run Sputnik Mundo, began broadcasting in the last several years and is produced in part in Montevideo, Uruguay.

Together, experts said, the companies have been the main source of information for Twitter bots and so-called troll accounts that have targeted Mr. Guaidó’s movement in Venezuela.

Bret Schafer, a disinformation and media expert at the Alliance for Securing Democracy, an initiative of the German Marshall Fund of the United States, said some Twitter accounts spreading disinformation in Venezuela could be traced to the Internet Research Agency, the Russian troll factory that is run by loyalists to President Vladimir V. Putin and is accused of interfering in the 2016 American presidential campaign.

The influence campaigns of Russian-linked Twitter accounts in South America “are proxy elements to conquer the influence of the United States or the liberal democracies,” said another expert, Javier Lesaca Esquiroz, a visiting scholar at the School of International and Public Affairs at Columbia University.

“At some point, we can say this is the continuation of the Cold War that never ended,” Mr. Esquiroz said.

The analyses provided by the State Department did not prove that the Twitter accounts that stoked the South American protests were direct conduits of the Russian government. Instead, they were described as “likely linked to the Russian state” through computer-generated or other data mining analyses that support other government conclusions that tie them to Moscow.

A spokesman for the Russian Embassy in Washington, Nikolay Lakhonin, declined to comment on Thursday, asking only for “real evidence” of a Russian-linked disinformation campaign in South America.

In Chile, President Sebastián Piñera has said foreign actors helped incite a wave of protests and acts of vandalism that began in late October, plunging the country into a monthslong crisis. But he did not blame a specific government or region.

A “foreign hand” had worked to fuel the unrest online, disseminating false reports on social media during the early days of the upheaval, he said in a December interview with CNN en Español: “It’s an attack against the political system.”

The rate of posts by Russian-linked Twitter accounts during the anti-government protests in Chile was 9 percent higher than during the Democratic primary campaigns last year in the United States — usually a topic of high interest, the State Department analyses found.

The analyses showed that the Twitter accounts posted in Spanish and English, targeting the Chilean public and foreign audiences.

A Twitter campaign of #chile, which was the fifth-most popular hashtag among 3,300 Russian-linked Twitter accounts from Oct. 23 to Oct. 29, the peak of the protests, was not even in the top 100 by late December, according to the State Department data.

Mr. Piñera’s government commissioned its own report, which asserted that 31 percent of social media posts during an intense period of the crisis were disseminated from outside Chile. Analysts said the Chilean public greeted the report with criticism and mockery, saying that it failed to offer convincing evidence that foreign actors played a leading role in inciting the protests.

“There hasn’t been any proof that there was foreign meddling,” said Marta Lagos, the director of Latinobarómetro, which studies public opinion across Latin America. “Until now, they have yet to find any foreigner involved in criminal activity.”

In neighboring Bolivia, the State Department analyses found that the most shared tweet among Russian-linked accounts in the 24 hours after Mr. Morales’s resignation was one by the former president himself — denouncing a “coup” that he said had taken over. That tweet has since been deleted, but not before it was shared more than 85,000 times.

The network of Russian-linked Twitter accounts usually generates fewer than five posts about Bolivia daily, the State Department analyses found. That surged to more than 1,000 tweets in the days immediately before and after Mr. Morales ceded to violent protests and accusations of fixed elections to keep himself in power.

A Russian state energy company reportedly worked to bolster Mr. Morales’s campaign — and attacked his opponents — on social media months before the election on Oct. 20.

The influence campaign has outlasted the protests.

One of the accounts being monitored by the State Department — @FriendsofPutin — criticized the Trump administration’s continued pressure campaign against Mr. Maduro’s government in Venezuela in a Dec. 12 tweet.

“Unfortunately, Washington is not even thinking about abandoning their course for ousting the legitimate Venezuelan government,” it said in English. The State Department analyses said the post was retweeted the same day by accounts like @RussianHeroe and @Putintrump, though those tweets no longer appear on the accounts.

The State Department concluded that all three accounts most likely are Russian proxies, or bots and trolls trying to amplify their message without being flagged as fake.

This month, the State Department’s special envoy for Venezuela issues, Elliott Abrams, told reporters in Washington that American officials had perhaps underestimated the level of Russian and Cuban support that had helped Mr. Maduro remain in power.

“We think all the time about how to do better,” Mr. Abrams said.

Ernesto Londoño contributed reporting from Rio de Janeiro.

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[buddyrabrahams]

Ranking the 12 teams most likely to win the FIFA World Cup

The FIFA World Cup is upon us, and while many teams will be dreaming, only a handful have a realistic chance of claiming the crown. They tend to be traditional powerhouses who have been to the later stages recently and expect to do so again.

We’ll look at a bit of a wider list — anything can happen in the knockout stages, after all, and there are a number of teams who do have talent despite not being among the frontrunners. Here are 12 teams most likely to take home the World Cup in 2018.

12) Mexico

Making the last 16 has never really been a problem for Mexico, and they stand a decent chance of getting that far again in 2018. The question is whether they can go further; they’ve been knocked out at that stage in the last six World Cups. It’s possible, though like some other teams, they haven’t exactly been convincing in their run through qualifying. It shouldn’t be a question whether they can score enough given they can claim Javier Hernandez and Carlos Vela, among others, but it’s been an issue. They probably also lack the defensive steadiness to halt the top attacks in their tracks. There’s talent here, though.

11) Croatia

It’s hard to know what to make of Croatia, who boast one of the world’s most gifted players in Luka Modric. There’s talent around him, too, but they’re a team prone to losing to lesser opponents in international tournaments. Modric is a gifted midfielder who can create like few others, while Ivan Rakitic is an accomplished midfielder and Ivan Perisic is a quality winger. Up front, Mario Mandzukic has long been regarded as a quality scorer. It remains to be seen whether it all comes together, or whether they can keep things sufficiently tight defensively.

10) Colombia

Colombia reached the quarterfinals in Brazil on the back of a dazzling show from James Rodriguez, who is no longer the relative unknown he was then. He can take them far, but he will have some help thanks to a talented defense and some good players in midfield, including Rodriguez and Juan Cuadrado. The question will be whether they can score enough. Rodriguez will have to be at his creative best and striker Radamel Falcao must be firing if Colombia want to be a factor at the latter stages, but it’s doable.

9) Uruguay

The Uruguayans are blessed with a terrific spine, and have a chance to go far as long as Luis Suarez doesn’t bite anyone this time around. Diego Godin and Jose Gimenez are excellent at the back, and there is no doubting the quality of Suarez and Edinson Cavani up front. It’s everything in-between that will make it tough for Uruguay to win. They should clear the group stage with ease, but the midfield must step up, particularly 20-year-old prodigy Rodrigo Betancur. If the pieces fall in the right places, they could make a real run at it.

8) England

England hasn’t won a World Cup since 1966, and that probably won’t change in 2018. There’s more talent in the squad than there was in 2014, which alone counts for something. Harry Kane is one of the world’s elite pure scorers, and Raheem Sterling’s game has taken numerous steps forward in the past calendar year at Manchester City. Beyond that, it’s up to young players to step up, with midfielder Dele Alli and defender John Stones in particular needing to play beyond their years. It’s unrealistic to expect the English to win, but they could surprise, and anything can happen in the knockout stages.

7) Belgium

Belgium remains the poster child for the fact that talent doesn’t guarantee you anything if you’re top-heavy and lacking in coherent strategy. You can rattle off a half dozen star players in their ranks — Romelu Lukaku, Eden Hazard, Kevin De Bruyne, Toby Alderweireld, Vincent Kompany, and Jan Vertonghen are all excellent at what they do. In terms of pure talent, they can match up with virtually anyone, but they don’t have the depth of some of their counterparts and have fallen flat in nearly every international tournament they played in under previous manager Marc Wilmots. Roberto Martinez is more experienced, but is still fighting the same problems, and leaving midfield enforcer Radja Nainggolan out of the squad entirely could easily backfire. The talent is there to go far. Can it gel?

6) Portugal

Similarly to Argentina, Portugal can win the World Cup because they have Cristiano Ronaldo. While his best days are probably behind him, the Real Madrid superstar can still drag a team over the line with sheer talent and determination. He does have some talent around him — the likes of Bernardo Silva and Joao Moutinho are good players, and few nations can claim a more experienced defender than Pepe. But the reality is, despite winning Euro 2016, the Portuguese had a lot of close calls and escapes in that tournament, and this will be even harder. That said, they did win it, and they have Ronaldo, so discount them at your own risk.

5) Argentina

Argentina has a chance to win the World Cup for one simple reason: they have Lionel Messi and everyone else does not. If only he had enough talent around him to make it seem more realistic. Messi is so good that he can win any game by himself, able to put together a moment of brilliance against any side in the world out of seemingly nothing. It’s sometimes enough to mask the fact that Argentina’s defense is lacking in quality and Messi’s support in attack isn’t quite as good as it was four years ago, despite the undeniable talent of Angel Di Maria and Sergio Aguero. The Argentine gameplan too often remains “hope Messi does something good.” That’s probably not enough, though the fact that they have a real chance is a testament to how good he is.

4) France

Runners-up at Euro 2016, the French golden generation is well and truly coming of age just in time for 2018. Kylian Mbappe and Antoine Griezmann lead the line, Paul Pogba has the talent to take control of any game, and they have a formidable center back pairing in Raphael Varane and Samuel Umtiti. Add in one of the world’s better goalkeepers in Hugo Lloris and the depth to make an impact in any game and you have one of the four clear favorites in the competition.

What could hold them back? They have often looked less than the sum of their parts, and struggled at times in qualifying. One cannot simply rely on moments of individual magic to win a World Cup, and at times, France has done too much of that.

3) Brazil

It’s a simple fact that Brazil’s 2014 World Cup squad simply wasn’t as good as those of their rivals, and they were boosted by the backing of their home country to a semifinal that was always going to be a stretch for them to win. They’re much better this time. Spearheaded by a now-healthy Neymar, goals won’t be a problem, as Gabriel Jesus and Roberto Firmino wait behind him in case he can’t get the job done. Creative midfielders Coutinho and Paulinho can score, Casemiro and Fernandinho can handle defensive duties in midfield, and they’re experienced at the back with Thiago Silva and Marcelo. There’s talent across the board here, enough so that they can realistically expect to contend for the country’s first World Cup in 16 years — a drought that is, for this nation, hard to fathom.

2) Spain

Under new manager Julen Lopetegui, the Spanish squad looks revitalized, and they’ve re-established themselves as a potential favorite after their disappointing showing at 2014’s tournament, as well as underwhelming at Euro 2016. The Sergio Ramos-Gerard Pique defensive pairing remains an immense one, and they have more top-quality midfielders than they will know what to do with, led by the iconic Andres Iniesta. One major question Lopetegui will have to answer is who will finish off the attacks. Diego Costa is by the far the most established forward in the squad, though he has not meshed perfectly with the team’s style of play in the past.

1) Germany

One would be remiss to have the defending champions ranked anywhere but the top. Their depth is such that Mario Gotze, the man who scored the extra time goal to win them the World Cup in 2014, won’t even be making the trip to Russia this year. They also won last year’s Confederations Cup with essentially their B-team.

The German squad has immense experience, and manager Joachim Low will be able to turn to his experienced hands. Toni Kroos remains one of the world’s best midfielders, while Thomas Muller and Mesut Ozil have immense experience at this level in spite of less-than-stellar club seasons. As an added boost, goalkeeper Manuel Neuer, who missed most of Bayern Munich’s club season with injury, is fit and ready to go. It’s not as if they needed more help, but they have it.

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[party-hard-or-die]

Pope crisis talks with Chile bishops over abuse may lead to purge

VATICAN CITY (Reuters) – Thirty-four Chilean bishops summoned to the Vatican over a cover-up of sexual abuse by clergy began crisis meetings with Pope Francis on Tuesday that could result in a purge of Chile’s Catholic hierarchy.

Chilean bishop Luis Fernando Ramos Perez attends a news conference ahead of three days of closed-door, crisis meetings with Pope Francis at the Vatican, May 14, 2018. REUTERS/Yara Nardi

“We feel pain and shame,” Fernando Ramos, an auxiliary bishop of Santiago, told a news conference ahead of the three days of closed-door meetings.

The scandal has devastated the credibility of the Church in the once staunchly Catholic country. It has also hurt the pope’s own image because this year he strongly defended a bishop accused in the alleged cover-up before reversing his position.

Bishop Juan Ignacio Gonzalez of the city of San Bernardo said he could not rule out some of the tainted bishops resigning or being sacked, as many Chileans have demanded.

“It does not depend on us. Each person must decide this together with the pope,” he said.

One of the key bishops in the crisis is Juan Barros, whom the pope appointed to the southern city of Osorno in 2015 despite allegations that he had covered up sexual abuse of minors by his mentor, Father Fernando Karadima. Barros has said he was unaware of any wrongdoing.

Luis Badilla, a Rome-based Chilean commentator for the Vatican-affiliated blog “Il Sismografo”, called for “exemplary and educational decisions” by the pope to put the Chilean Church back on course.

Chilean bishop Juan Ignacio Gonzalez Errazuriz speaks during a news conference ahead of three days of closed-door, crisis meetings with Pope Francis at the Vatican, May 14, 2018. REUTERS/Yara Nardi

During his trip to Chile in January, the pope said he had no proof against Barros, believed he was innocent, and that accusations against him were “slander” until proven otherwise.

But days after returning to Rome, the pope, citing new information, sent sexual abuse investigator Archbishop Charles Scicluna of Malta to Chile to speak to victims, witnesses and other Church members. He produced a 2,300-page report that will be discussed at the Vatican meetings.

VICTIMS FELT DEMONIZED, DISCREDITED

Victims have also accused other bishops of either covering up the abuse by Karadima, of delaying investigations, or of discrediting victims in the media and demonizing them in private conversations and emails.

Last month, Francis held four days of meetings with Juan Carlos Cruz, James Hamilton and Jose Andres Murillo, three men abused by Karadima when they were teenagers in Santiago.

Slideshow (4 Images)

They said in a statement afterwards that they had been “treated as enemies” by Chilean Church leaders for 10 years.

Karadima, who trained some of the bishops for the priesthood decades ago, was found guilty in a Vatican investigation in 2011 of abusing boys in Santiago in the 1970s and 1980s.

He never faced civilian justice because of the statute of limitations. Now 87 and living in a nursing home in Chile, Karadima has always denied the allegations.

At the pre-meeting news conference, Gonzalez said he had met many victims and knew the three who met the pope last month.

One of the victims, Cruz, later tweeted: “I’ve never seen him before in my life. The truth according to the bishops of Chile is very different from what we all have lived.”

In a stern statement last Saturday, the Vatican indicated that the pope intended to be tough.

It spoke of “cover-ups and grave omissions regarding the victims” and said the meetings would seek to determine “collective and individual responsibility for these devastating wounds”.

In a homily at his daily morning Mass on Tuesday, without specifically mentioning Chile, Francis said every bishop should know “when it’s time to take his leave and step down”.

Reporting By Philip Pullella; Editing by Kevin Liffey

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