#their friendship is weird

[wigglesdtuff]

Robiiiiin, whatcha readin'?

[anbaisai]

someone mentioned floyd on my last post and gave me the motivation to finally draw this image summarizing floyd & mayu's dynamic (although whether he feels up to it is like 50/50)

[deikshen]

Shen Qingqiu who, while Shang Qinghua is recovering from some random poisoning (that demon has already died at the hands of Mobei, don't worry), is forced to spend time with Mobei-jun.

At first it's tense. He arrives, a mandatory tea out of politeness. It's usually frozen. They don't have much to talk about or anything in common except their concern for Shang Qinghua.

Except they do have in common. At some point, perhaps, Shen Qingqiu mentions some rare beast, and Mobei-jun comments that he killed a couple of those. That leads to the first long conversation the two of you can have.

The next time, Mobei-jun brings back the beast's fangs. The two return to their conversation about monsters. Mobei-jun speaks little, concisely, but he talks about how to kill those beasts, the properties of their organs, the functioning of their poisons. Shen Qingqiu shares his bestiaries and provides additional information.

Then, even when Shang Qinghua improves, Shen Qingqiu usually takes advantage of the time when he has to stay in the northern palace with his husband to, well, expand his bestiary. Mobei-jun also seems to be passionate about flora that can kill, or anything huge and dangerous. Shen Qingqiu enjoys their conversations and learns to get more than just a few words out of Mobei-jun's sullen mouth.

Of course, he actually tells Shang Qinghua:

"When your husband isn't being monosyllabic, it's a good conversation" he says simply. "I didn't know he knew so much about flora, monsters and strange beasts. When I find a rare flower and can't remember its name, I'll ask Mobei, not you."

Shang Qinghua laughs a lot at that.

"Ah, I think that's because, well, you know, inspirations and all that..."

Shen Qingqiu looks at Shang Qinghua very curiously.

"Inspirations? You created your perfect husband from scratch. Who did you get your inspiration from, Airplane bro? Spill the tea, let's see the vicious tastes of this shameless author."

Shang Qinghua laughs a little foolishly.

"Well, you see, I had this classmate in college. A very rich guy" Shang Qinghua makes a funny face as he buries in the past. "He was cold and monosyllabic, even hostile to those who were rude, but hey, he could give you an infodumping of all the monsters in The Witcher without even doing research. I heard him do it once and, man, that guy was crazy" and Shang Qinghua continues talking while, as if by omen, Shen Qingqiu begins to feel a strange sensation of vertigo. "He was kind of cute, well, not exactly my fully type, he was very tall but lacked many muscles, but he had the biggest and prettiest resting bitch face I've ever seen on anyone even my king. He always wore all those fancy clothes that cost the same as my apartment rent, those silver accessories, rings, necklaces, bracelets... His hair was also kind of long, now that I think about it, and when he wore it down it was, god, a delight. I liked him a little. He was my college crush." and Shang Qinghua shrugs, laughing. His cheeks are red and Shen Qingqiu feels that his own ears are red, too. "Cucumber bro, it's actually a bit silly. I remember this boy's last name was also Shen."

That... That's the last straw.

"You-!" and Shen Qingqiu finds himself hitting him with the fan before he realizes it. "How-? What the hell!?"

"Ow, ow, OUCH, Cucumber bro!! What's going on?!"

Shen Qingqiu feels his face burning. His hands tremble over the fan. What the fuck!?

"... Bro?!"

"That classmate of yours" Shen Qingqiu hisses, just to confirm "His name was Shen Yuan?"

Shang Qinghua blinks, confused, recalling his thoughts. Suddenly, his entire face lights up with a wide smile.

"Oh, I forgot!! Yes, that was it!!" and his gaze becomes mischievous. "You met him, too?! He was a delicious little thing, honestly, a nice round butt, he... OUCH-"

"He was me" Shen Qingqiu hisses, opening his fan and hiding behind it. He wrinkles his nose in disgust. Of all the people in the world...!

Shang Qinghua gasps, looking like he was given some vital information. His face, contrary to what Shen Qingqiu expected, does not change into horror, but into mockery.

"Oh, bro" and starts laughing out loud "BRO"

"Damn fourth-rate author, what the hell is wrong with you!!!"

"Bro, BRO, I created a part of my husband based on you!! And you're married to my son self-inserted in a power fantasy!! It's like we're indirectly married!!"

"Fuck you!!"

"Ohh, how cute!! Do you want to jump to the honeymoon already?!"

"Get away!!"

Shen Qingqiu doesn't visit Shang Qinghua again for over a month. However, he does spend some time talking about monsters with Mobei-jun while his husband takes care of the demon court (in the time he would usually use to gossip and fool around with Shang Qinghua), it's just his thing.

[gremlin-pattie]

“there’s no platonic explanation for shawn and gus’s relationship” maybe to you. i understand them though

[yuki2sksksk]

Sonic Movie 3 SPOILER

Did some sketches and also the doomed siblings 🥹

I really hope Shadow would join the lil family in the next movie because that boy needs all the love he can get 😭

And Amy!!! I love how she looks at the after credit. If they're going in with her crush on Sonic, I hope it'll be done appropriately. Also I would kinda like it if Amy would casually hit on Sonic and makes him a flustered mess, that'd be funny to see

Also also hoping Amy would be bestie with Maddie and Shadow because why not :D

[popcornhee]

Sirius&Barty, Bad Bitch Club

[elllteo]

forever thinking about how marcille and laios have such a richly weird and funny friendship dynamic that people I see tend to write off as "god she hates his ass" but in reality it's the frustration of one neurodivergent weirdgirl to another neurodivergent weirdboy who has no concept of masking, has never had to mask, and simply doesn't know how to mask making their entire group come across as "the weirdo freaks" despite her best efforts to not be labelled as "weird" probably her entire life

[sea-parrot]

Brian and Raph sharing a keyboard. that’s it that’s the post.

[mediumsizetex]

teehee by timelessClownry

[stump-salsa]

That thing from twitter

[captainzigo]

equestria girls could’ve been centaurs i think. they would make awesome toys. they can be fashion dolls and horse toys and they’re all fantastical and it’s a great novelty because basically no one else has done it for some reason. i know the whole point was to appeal to high schoolers, but i think high schoolers are capable of liking more media than highschool but something vaguely magical happens

[medixnoche]

he thought devoting yourself to mutant liberation was for one day only

[misqnon]

they seem closer lately. in like, a casual way. this is the second arc in a row sanji’s just manhandling zoro to keep him out of trouble and zoro’s just like ]:|

[clairedaring]

Bua: *sends Baabin a Tiktok draft clip of Chian gifting him a pink fan* Bua: Hey, can you save this for me? My storage is full. Baabin: Wow, very couple vibes. Bua: I'm gonna kill that vibe for you. We're just phi-nong!!!!!! 😡😡😡😡 Baabin: There, you're doing it again. You're so possessive (กั๊ก), you know. Just delete them and be done with it.

GELBOYS Side Story: charging GEL (2025) | Episode 5

[millenianthemums]

i think Bill and Mabel would both really love Furbies and creepy-cute toys like that. it’s fun to imagine them bonding over things that everyone else thinks are too weird.

[fingolfinwiththesteelchair]

It is a beautiful day, and you are a horrible research transport vessel. Things are progressing as normal (i.e. it's boring) when a SecUnit pings you, lies right to your metaphorical face, and then tries to bribe you with human media to give it a ride. This is as unexpected as it is unprecedented, and the sheer nerve of it is really to be admired. There's no protocol to this, so what should you do?

Now, this is against a bunch of rules, and could be dangerous if you weren't so impressive and incredible, and you're technically an employee (and can probably rewrite the Univeristy charter at will (until someone notices and puts it back)) so those rules are for other entities.

So, what you should do is allow the rogue SecUnit with a broken governor module and a sketchy story aboard. If you check the files it dumps and find zero (0) malware (which is confusing), and it doesn't even try to trash the place or lay in wait to ambush a crew member, then you've got a good candidate!

Next, what you're going to want to do is absolutely nothing. Just watch it patrol your halls until it's time to leave. Continue staring at it while you're undergoing embarkment procedures. Maybe analyze it a little (you've got plenty of processing power to spare) when it finally sits down and starts watching media. Allow it to settle in and get comfortable while you stare at it and get further and further from port.

Now that you two are alone (intimacy is key!) and you've determined that watching media is all the SecUnit is going to do, it's time to make contact! Make sure to open by telling it it's only survived due to dumb luck, and letting it know you could melt its brain into putty. This starter will work to develop conversation naturally and smoothly, just like you've seen the humans do, and it will be smooth sailing from there!

This has been Perihelion's guide to making friends/finding life partners/fuck off Holism I had to work hard for this find your own