#the whole duty w the….thing that happened was very good

[thebestofoneshots]

This isn’t really a request but this came to may head at three in the morning ok Imagine like your getting fucked by one of the Marauders or all of them and yk those moving pictures they have in the wizard world image they have a whole box filled of the reader getting back shots and EVERYTHING 😵‍💫🥴

THE STASH | marauders x reader

Pairing: J.P. x S.B. x R.L x Female Reader

Word Count: 5 k

Warnings: Smut, finger fucкing, a little bit of PTSD on Sirius, pictures taken w/o reader’s knowledge, reader being insecure and gaining back confidence thanks to the boys.

Prompt: You find the boy's stash, filled with lusty pictures and they make you feel insecure, thoughts about not being good enough for them arise, the catch is, that’s THE OLD stash. (Happy ending)

Notes: I had a similar idea already in my head so when I saw this ask I just knew I had to make it happen.

♡ NSFW: Smut under the cut

You knocked on their door a couple of times when no one said anything, you decided to let yourself  in, “Rem? Jamie? Sirius?” 

No answer. 

You looked around and went to sit by Remus’ bed. He said he’d see you in their room later that night for study and maybe something more, but with study club and prefect duties, you assumed he was as busy as the two other boys were with the quidditch training. You didn’t mind it much though, their room was a lot more quiet to study in than yours, and it was always fun to see their surprised faces when they walked in and you were there. 

You were taking your book and some parchment out when a pot of ink fell from your bag and onto the floor. There was a thud and then another one and then it spilled all over. You gasped and left the bag on the side before leaning down to pick it up. You whispered a quick “reparo,” and the crystal pot wasn’t leaking anymore, but the ink was still on the floor and some of it was spilling down the wooden floorboard. 

“Fuck,” you whispered as you summoned a napkin from your bag and started to clean as best as you could, but it didn’t seem to be working, it was still spilling down into what looked like a nook on the floor. You frowned and looked at the wooden board in detail only to realize there was a section that was a little more worn than the rest. 

You frowned and tried to lift the board by digging your nails on the side but it wasn’t working, you huffed and walked over to Sirius’ night table to see if he still had his pocket knife there. Luckily he did, and you took it, pulling out one of the blades and using it as a crane to lift the wooden board.

Once you did you realized the ink had slipped inside most of the things they kept in there. “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you whispered continuously as you tried to pull off the things in fear that they would be ruined with the ink. There were some old letters, some hand-rolled cigars, a few potions and then a small box, that one had gotten most of the ink. You winced and pulled it out, biting your lip as you tried to concentrate. You had been so busy with the cleaning, that you never saw the spiderwebs that covered most of the items. 

“Evanesco,” you whispered, focused solely on the ink, which successfully disappeared, but so did the small lock they had on the box and it opened by itself. You blinked a couple of times when you saw what was inside. You carefully grabbed one of the images, a stunning red-headed witch, winking at you as she bounced around, with her very large, and very beautiful breasts in full display. 

You gulped as you stared at her, she wiggled her shoulders a bit and gave you another wink. You sucked in a breath, she was freaking stunning. And probably there because of James’ fixation with redheads. 

The rest of the pictures were turned over, but curiosity got the best of you, and you took another piece of paper from the box. That one was bent in four, as if it had been ripped from a magazine. You slowly unbend it, first one fold and then the other and there was another stunning witch in the image. 

This one had smaller breasts, but she was leaning down on a bed, perfectly manicured hands brushing over her own folds, two perfectly long and well-shaped legs on the side. She had dark skin and the light reflected on her legs as she accommodated on the bed, her head leaning back with what looked like a sigh as she rolled her hand over her clit. She too was beautiful, and perfect. 

You sat the image on the side, next to the redhead and pulled another one. One of the smaller ones, only to be met with yet another stunning witch, perfectly flat stomach, and beautiful perky breasts, she was riding a pillow, one hand on the bed and looking straight at you as she bit her lips, inviting, enticing. You placed her next to the others as you pulled another image. And then another, and then another. 

Image after image, perfectly attractive witches in all sorts of positions, some by themselves, some with companions (either other hot witches or the cock of a wizard or two). You pressed your legs together, there was a mix of feelings inside you. First of all, you were a little turned on after seeing such kind of imagery. But second, and most important. You were a little upset. 

Which was ridiculous, you knew. Expecting the boys to pleasure themselves with the thought of you in mind when you weren’t around was stupid, especially when there were clearly much better and hotter witches in the market. What with their perfectly round breasts and their beautiful lips and flat stomachs and long legs and rosy cunts. You looked at them with a bit of a frown, they all had something in common, they were perfect, and you? You were far, far from that. 

Now you weren’t upset that the boys were doing themselves, you knew men needed a lot more release than women did and you tried to keep that in mind as you placed all the beautiful witches back in their box, but you couldn’t help but think: Did they also think of them when they were with you? Did they imagine the beautiful redhead’s breasts when they were kissing yours, or maybe that they were in between the legs of that girl with the gorgeous reflective skin instead of your own? 

While the pictures were meant to be stimulating, and they had been a little at the beginning, the more you thought about them, the more you thought they were so much unlike you and the more your thoughts continued to spiral. 

“Such beautiful witches…” you murmured as you closed the box, “and they are equally gorgeous men… why are they���“ You didn’t finish your words out loud, too painful to say them outside of your head. 

Why are they with me? 

You carefully placed the box back into its spot, cleaned the rest of the things that had gotten stained and placed everything back in their stash. You carefully placed the wooden plank back where it belonged and put Sirius’ knife back in his drawers. You took a deep breath, not feeling up for much and instead ripped a page from your notebook. 

“I’m feeling a little sick, see you boys tomorrow.”

It was simple enough not to make them question further, you left it on top of Remus’ bed and left the room. 

The following day, the boys being as marvelous and attentive as they were, had gotten you to forget about the stash almost completely. And things had been absolutely perfect since then.

At least until a few days later, you had been playing wizards chess with Sirius on his bed, and after he beat you for the third time making you feel both hopeless and a little dumb for not anticipating his moves –which was also ridiculous because Sirius had been a wizard chess champion– he offered to make it up to you. 

It was in the spark in his eyes that you knew exactly what he meant. You bit your lip, Remus was reading a book on his bed while James was snoring lightly next to him, one hand draped across the other boy’s torso. You knew they’d want to join in when they realized what you and Sirius were up to, and it sent a shiver down your stomach. 

“What do you say, doll?” Sirius asked as he levitated the chess board and the broken pieces to the side, inviting you to come closer.

You huffed “You think you can make it up with your little puppy eyes?” 

Sirius pretended to think about it for a second before nodding. “While they should be enough, I’m still planning to use more than just my looks to make you feel better.” 

You returned the smile and leaned closer to him, moving to straddle his sitting form, his back was pressed to the headboard and you could feel he was at least a little excited as you leaned into him. 

“Did you win so many times just so you could say that to me?” You asked in disbelief, you were drumming your fingers near the nape of his neck.

“I might have been a little extra attentive,” he replied as he grabbed onto your hips and placed a kiss on your neck. “I know how riled up you get when you can’t best me,” he said before placing another kiss, this time further up, “I kind of enjoy seeing your little frown, and angry looks,” he admitted, he was now kissing your jaw. You rolled your hips into his and he tightened his grip on your hips in response. 

You smiled, loving the fact that you knew exactly what Sirius liked and how to get him worked up, at least as much as he knew of you. You rolled your hips again and he reached his hand under your skirt, feeling the outside of your leg before flicking his hand to the inside of it. To the softer skin that he grabbed with firm tenderness. Itching his hand closer and closer, making sure to massage your skin, tauntingly. 

You leaned your head onto his shoulder, letting his beautiful hair fall on your face as you rolled your hips again, a lot softer this time, matching his pace and wanting his hand to come closer. 

“Eager, are we?” he teased.

“Shhh, you’ll wake up Jamie,” you said as you leaned over to kiss his neck. He bit his lip to hold back a moan and finally placed his hand over your panties, tracing a soft line over your slit. You bucked your hips against his hand and he chuckled lightly. 

Remus, who had been focused on his book so far, frowned and looked up at the two of you, smirking a little when he noticed what you were up to. Of course, he knew that chuckle, it was Sirius’ sexy teasing laugh. 

“Easy love or you’ll be the one to wake up Prongs,” he said, leaning his head to your ear and softly nibbling on it. He traced his hand over your slit a couple more times, and you bucked your hips again. He smiled, you didn’t see it, but you felt it against your skin, “All right, all right…” he said as he flicked his finger over the hem of your panties and moved them aside. You leaned even closer to him as he dug his fingers in, “All of this for me?” he teased as he felt how wet you were. 

Remus, who was now only half looking at his book, had somewhat of a fun time as he listened in to your conversation with Sirius. He would be lying if he said he didn’t find it stimulating. But he also knew Sirius had had a bit of a bad week, so he thought of letting him have you just for himself, at least for a little bit longer, or until James woke up, just as eager to join in. 

“Sirius please,” you whined with a frown and he smiled, letting his fingers trace up until they found your clit, making circles over it, which had you bucking your hips against him again. You bit the side of your cheek as you allowed him to move his hand, leaning in to kiss his neck again, to muffle any possible moans with his skin. 

“May I?” he asked, teasing your entrance with his index. 

“Mhm,” you said and bucked your hips again, eager for him to do his thing. And he complied, digging his finger inside and allowing it to move inside you as expertly as ever. 

“So tight,” he whispered, Remus’ cock twitching at Sirius’ words and reconsidering whether he actually wanted to wait more before joining in. 

He did not, so he carefully lifted James’ arm from his torso and walked towards Sirius’ bed. He sat right beside the two of you, a cocky smile on his face as he tilted his head to the side, “You two having fun there?” he asked, “without me?” 

“You’re always welcome to join in Moony,” Sirius said with a teasing grin as he pulled you back just a little. You had both of your hands on Sirius’ shoulders, and you were now using them as leverage to ride his hand. 

Moony smiled, “I might just watch for a while,” he said, leaning back and placing one of his hands on the back of Sirius’ neck. He knew how much small actions and touches like that made Sirius react, and he smiled as the boy’s breath hitched in his throat. He then turned to look at you, a mischievous grin on his face, he took his wand out and whispered “Evanesco.”  

Suddenly both your shirt and bra disappeared, giving both boys the perfect sight of your breasts perking up at the sudden cold. Sirius grunted as he stared, and Remus hummed satisfied. You clenched around Sirius’ fingers –which were now two– whimpered and let out a soft moan. 

But then, as you felt their gazes on you, and you felt your own boobs bouncing as you continued to ride Sirius’ expert fingers, you started to feel self-conscious, of how you looked, of how they were staring at you, on whether they were actually thinking of you or imagining something else, someone else. Maybe the beautiful redhead? The busty blonde? The reflextive-skinned goddess with the beautiful legs? The brunette with the beautiful ass?

Suddenly the lights flickered, and they were gone. You relaxed, Sirius felt the grip on his shoulder untensing, but he thought it was because you were close. But Sirius liked to see your fucked out face when he had his fingers inside you, and in seconds the lights were turned back on, and you tensed instantly. 

The muscle movements were normal, but the way you suddenly dug your nails into his shoulders was not, at least not in the moment it was happening and not in the way it was either. Something was up.

He stopped moving his hand in an instant, “you all right, angel?” he asked, a small wrinkle forming on his forehead as his brows furrowed together. 

You seemed to be lost in thought for a second, Remus noticed that too, “Yeah… just. Let’s leave the lights off today.” 

Now it was Remus’ turn to frown, he took his hand from Sirius’ neck and sat straighter, pulling back and leaning in closer to look at your face, his hand instinctively traveling to your thigh.  Sirius, with one hand still inside you –now unmoving– was brushing his thumb in circles on your waist, they were both giving you their unwavering attention, and your breath hitched in your throat. You looked at them nervously, your eyes traveling from boy to boy at unprecedented speeds and you bit your lip, and then the lights were off again. 

Once they were off, you sighed and leaned your head on Sirius’ shoulder. He felt how you relaxed in an instant, and his frown deepened. “Angel, what is it?” 

“Nothing, light’s giving me a headache,” you lied. 

Sirius turned to Remus, while he couldn’t see much, he knew Remus would probably be able to see his questioning stance easily, with his enhanced senses, at least. “You believe her?” he mouthed. 

Remus shook his head in response, and when he realized Sirius couldn’t actually see he turned to you and placed his hand on your shoulder. “Are you sure that’s it, luv?” 

You swallowed, which was enough indication you weren’t, and you lied again, “Yes, let’s just, continue as is.” 

Sirius knew you were lying, and he hated it when you lied to him, he also hated not being able to see shit while Remus could see your every reaction so he turned the lights on, didn’t even use his wand for it, and you tensed again. 

You were taken aback by that and swallowed thickly. Your breath was slightly ragged and it was not because you were turned on, in fact, if anything, you felt rather apprehensive now. You cleared your throat. “You know, maybe I’m just not feeling it,” you lied again and pulled yourself off of his hand. 

Sirius felt way too many things at the same time, he was worried about your reaction since he thought he’d done something wrong. He was angry because he knew you were hiding the exact reason; he wanted, no, he needed to know what was up so he would never do it again, and thirdly, he was upset, he’d felt…rejected. And by you, no other. 

By the time Sirius reacted again, you were buttoning your shirt up and walking towards their door. James, who had been asleep till then, was finally awoken by the lights coming on and off and the small commotion going on. He was confused, at first he thought you were just playing, but perhaps that was not it. 

But Sirius was faster, and he jumped over Remus to get to the door just as you were opening it and shut it closed. You jumped back just a little, shocked at how fast he’d moved, you were now the one with a frown, anger bubbling to your chest, Sirius’ temper had always been something you’d learn to deal with, and even if you knew it was justified now, that didn’t stop yours from flaring up. 

“That’s not it,” he said confidently, “that’s not it and you’re not getting out until you tell me what’s upset you.” 

“Sirius,” Remus said now, ever the conciliator. He’d also stood from the bed and walked the few strides left to get next to the two of you. 

Maybe it wasn’t the best reaction you could have had, but you were already pretty shaken up by the situation at hand, by your rather torturous thoughts and by Srius’ slamming of the door. “Oh, so you know my body better than I do?” you said defensively, “you would know if I have or not a headache.” 

“YES!” he responded stubbornly. “I know how it reacts when it has a headache and it’s not the way you were reacting now!” 

You shook your head as you scoffed, James was now sitting on the bed looking at the situation both confused and worried. 

“Moony! Back me up on this?” he said as he turned his face to him. 

Remus bit his lip, as he shook his head, thinking before speaking. “He’s right luv, that was not your headache reaction.” 

You scoffed, “ff course, you’d take his side.” 

“I’m not taking any sides.” 

“Well you are, just don’t realize it!” you said angrily. “If I say I have a headache, I have one and that’s it. Now, I want to leave.” 

“Darling,” Remus said as he let out a breath, he seemed worried and upset as well now, you were trying really hard not to feel bad about it, trying to remind yourself why you needed to leave. 

It was Sirius who spoke again, his lips quivering as he found the right words, “Just tell me what I did wrong, I’ll never do it again, I promise,” his voice broke near the end. He was panicking, he was terrified he’d hurt you and that you’d leave thinking the worst of him. You knew what was hapening had brought back some past trauma and you didn’t want to be the catalyst of another panick attack.

You took a deep breath when you heard him, your frown deepening as you considered your words, “I found your stash.” 

The three men went quiet in an instant. Sirius looked like a deer trapped in headlights, Remus’ jaw had tightened and you’d heard James’ gasp in the back. 

“Darling, I–“ Sirius tried to speak but you cut him off. 

“No, no,” you tried to reason, more with yourself than with him. “I get, it’s fine, you need your release time and all that, I don’t mind.” 

“Well, you clearly do,” Remus said. You felt a hand on your shoulder, it was James’. He had walked towards you the moment he heard about the stash but you hadn’t noticed until then. You flinched but missed the hurt look that etched his features as he looked at you. 

“Well yes. But it’s a stupid feeling nonetheless. I’ll get over it. Just need time.” 

“It was me,” James said from behind, “it was my idea, not Sirius’. Don’t be upset at him.” 

You swallowed thickly, not wanting to be angry at James for something so natural in men, let alone because you knew this whole mess was created due to your own thoughts and insecurities, not theirs. And now you were upsetting them, what a great bIoody girlfriend you were. 

“I don’t bIoody care whose idea it was!” you spat. “Please let me off,” you said then, leg bouncing, you wanted to get out before you said something that would upset them more. 

“We’ll never do it again if that makes you feel better,” Sirius tried. 

“No it– It fucking doesn’t, okay? It’s fine, it’s… Found it a couple of nights ago when my ink pot fell on the floor.” The three boys exchanged a look with each other, had either of them changed its spot? “It’s pretty fresh in my mind and– I just– I can’t stop thinking you’re imagining them while being with me.” 

“Them?” Sirius asked, confused. 

“The pretty witches!” you responded, almost angrily. Remus, who was in front of you looked confused, and you huffed before adding in more detail. “Beautiful redhead,” you looked at James. “Gorgeous blonde,” you added as you turned to Sirius. Then looked back at the taller boy, “need I elaborate?” 

You heard James gasp from behind. “She found the old stash!” 

“Ah, so you have a new and improved one,” you said now, and shook your head as you turned at the door. Sirius was leaning in and he had a cheeky smile on his face now, which pissed you off even further. 

“You could call it that,” he said with a shrug. 

“Sirius,” Remus said calmly again. “Don’t.” 

But Sirius just smiled instead, “Oh but, I’m impressed. Our lovely angel was jealous.” 

“I was not.” You said flatly. “Get off the door, please,” the last part was much more of a beg than a demand. 

Sirius shook his head, “not until you see the new stash.” 

Remus and James exchanged looks after that, not even sure if they should or shouldn’t stop Sirius. 

“I don’t want to see the witches you use to wank off now, it’s enough with the images already in my head. Can’t stop thinking of them, of you thinking about them when you’re looking at me.” 

Sirius’ face fell instantly, his teasing stance almost faltering but not his determined blockage of the door. 

“That’s not–“ 

“Have you considered perhaps it was the other way around?” Remus asked as he placed a slightly hesitant hand on your shoulder. 

“What?” 

“That we imagined you when looking at them.” 

You were taken aback by that. No, you hadn’t considered that. “What about the redhead, can’t tell me she wasn’t there because of James’ old obsession with Evans?” 

James sighed, it was. That’s why they had to get a new stash. 

“She needs to see the new stash,” Sirius said while looking at the two other boys. 

“I don’t think that’s a great idea,” James intervened, it had been his idea after all, and he had admitted it to you now. He didn’t want to have you get mad over something else, and this time your anger would be indisputably justifiable. 

“I think it is,” Sirius insisted. 

You sighed, “you can continue deciding if you’re going to show me your new fuckable witches or not a different day. Sirius, get off the door.” 

He shook his head and turned to James, “Please?” 

“I don’t want to see them! Enough is enough!” 

You turned to the side to try and find another exit when you bumped into Remus, he had a box in his hand. He raised it a bit, you knew what it was instantly. 

“Remus!” James complained and went to get it but was hastily stopped by Sirius who got in the way and trapped him in his arms. 

“Prongs behave!” He said sternly. 

The path to the door was free now, but Remus’ serious stance made you curious, even more when he moved his finger to his lips and bit hard enough to draw bIood. 

“What the fu–“ 

“It’s so no one can open but us,” he explained. “We bIood charmed it.” 

You looked at him with a shocked face, you didn’t think they’d go to such lengths to hide their spicy stuff, what the hell did they even have there?

Some of the metal hinges at the top moved around a little bit, looking almost like a miniature Gringotts vault, and then it snapped open. Remus pushed it your way. You looked at the three boys before picking the first image up. It was Remus, shirtless Remus on the day you’d gone swimming at the Potter’s last summer. He was pulling his hair back and water glistened all over his torso, he looked at you and winked, before turning to look at something else. 

You gasped and pulled another picture, it was James and Sirius, both also shirtless, and they were making out under a tree. Sirius had his leg in between James’ and was leaning onto him rather intensely. 

The next one was you, you had the swimsuit you’d bought that summer, the one you thought looked really good on you, and you were on your knees, looking for something on the sand, your ass was slightly prompted up and the picture was obviously focused on that. You swallowed thickly and went to grab another one. 

You again, this time while making out with Remus, his hand was on your ass and you had realized they were taking a picture, looking at the camera with a diverted gasp before covering the lens with your hand. 

You took another one, and this time around you were genuinely shocked, it was Remus, being blown by James. His pinky pretty lips wrapped around Rem’s cock. “Oh, wow.” 

James frowned, he knew what else there was in there and he wasn’t sure if he wanted you to see it, he had never felt worse about his own ideas than now. Responsible, he knew he had bertrayed you, in a way. You took the next picture and stared at it for a minute. 

It was you again, well, you’re back at least. You were riding Sirius, moving back and forth over his cock as he helped you, hands on your waist as he bit his lip. You didn’t see your face, but you knew it hadn’t been that long ago. If Sirius’ new tattoo was any telling. 

You looked at the boys shocked, you hadn’t even realized they’d taken the picture, but you looked as pretty as any witch in the other photos, how had they gotten you to look so good? 

They hadn’t done anything, it was just you. 

“You don’t have to–“ James started, but you had already picked up another picture.

“Shut up,” you said simply.

 You again, this time you were sprawled on the bed with a blindfold on your head. That had been on your birthday. James had one of his hands on your leg, dangerously close to your slit while Sirius was kissing your breast and sucking at your nipples. 

And there was more, a lot of pictures from that day, all in compromising positions. Some involving you and the boys, some involving only the boys on different occasions, some you remembered, some in which you hadn’t even been present. There was even one of Sirius wanking off to the picture of you in the swimsuit you had seen earlier. 

“I’m sorry–“ James said, now sounding distressed and shaking Sirius off him. “I’m sorry angel, we should have never done it.” 

You grabbed another one of the photos, it had clearly been rushed, the camera being hidden as you turned your head to look at the boys, this time around you were kneeling on the bed, and James was jerking himself off to you, teasing your entrance before pulling out completely and allowing his cum to fall over your ass and back. 

“You’re right.,” you said as you placed the pictures back in the box, expression neutral. “You should have never done it without asking me–” James swallowed. 

“Love I–“ 

“James, shut up!” you said again, giving the pictures another look. “You should have never done it without asking me first,” you said as you flipped through some more pics and tsking. “I would have helped.” 

James’ jaw dropped, and you looked at him with a cheeky smile. Sirius was looking at you proudly and satisfied with his choice while Remus stared at the picture you had in your hand. The one where you were getting a back shot but was shaky and blurry because the camera had been hidden before you saw it. 

You moved the picture up, holding it between your fingers as you displayed it to the boys, “What do you say we recreate this one, but with better quality?” 

Sirius scoffed a laugh and smiled. 

“I’ll get the camera,” Remus said simply.

James was still stunned, and you leaned over and placed a soft kiss on his lips. Sirius leaned from behind and kissed you on the cheek “I told them you should know about it from the beginning but they said you’re too pure for it.” 

You laughed at that, “you boys keep calling me angel,” you said as you turned to Sirius and wrapped your hands around his neck, “but I wouldn’t have done all the things I have with you all if I wasn’t the exact opposite,” you added with a smirk.

Want to support me? Like and reblog this post. Comments are my life fuel, so send them out if you have any.

This one might get a part two, if you guys wanna see that <3

Raead more Marauders Fiction

[the-crow-binary]

Trans headcanons: when people ridicule the thing they think they support

So I'm tired. Let's have a talk.

Let's start with the very concept of headcanons, before I get to the infuriating part: A headcanon is, by definition, an idea that has never been confirmed as being actual canon. It's people imagining things about the characters they like, taking advantage of the fact the media they're in never depicted certain things, certain moments of the characters' life, to fill the gaps. A headcanon that make sense, and isn't there to just make the character your OC, takes into account what the actual canon has already shown, such as the character's personnality or goals. (I'm taking characters as example here but headcanon can be about the media's universe as a whole, too)

For example: In Castlevania: Curse of Darkness, and it's mangas, we never saw the life Hector and Isaac lead in the Castle between the moment Hector arrives (Isaac being already there) and the moment he runs away. It's a perfect opportunity to have fun and imagine what happened all those years! So, by taking into account what official products gave us, such as Isaac and Hector's personnalities (before and after the curse took ahold of them), how they interact together, and their common roles and duties under Dracula's reign, we can easily headcanon that they used to be friends and respected each other, before it slowly gets crushed by Isaac's obvious inferiority complex and jealousy in regards of Hector's power and relationship with Dracula.

That's a headcanon. A thing that can differ from one person to another, as interpretation can also vary, just like the plots we like to see. But let me tell you something absolutely crucial this headcanon does that make it a valid one: it doesn't contradict canon material.

That's a thing I feel like tends to be forgotten by many claiming their takes on characters as "headcanon". It stops being a "headcanon" and start being a "i'm twisting this character into my OC" when you start making shit up that not only does not fit the Character, but also contradicts directly what has been shown about said Character, just because you're a certain way or like certain things. That's not a headcanon. That's fanfiction. Not one that will interest those who actually like the canon and doesn't like when people change things about it instead of just adding to it, but if you're having fun, go for it! Just own up to the fact that you're deforming a pre-existent character, lol.

Now that... that is still pretty harmless. Sure it's annoying to see someone take your Blorbo and make it do things it would never do and call it a "headcanon", but it's just that. Annoying. But then...

Have you ever come across, in your favorite medias, male characters who look are act just a bit feminine? Or female characters who might be a little rough, angry, or muscular? And then you go look for content of them, and are met with "that character is trans" headcanons? Chances are, if you're very active in fandoms, you have. Maybe some of you cringe because there's something wrong going on there and you're not sure what, and you're afraid you're just being transphobic even though you support transfolks and maybe are one yourself... at least it was my case at first lol. But not to worry! There's a very good explanations to your cringiness! And it's that: Lots of those headcanons are straight up awful in their logic and an insult to every genders involved! :)

Let's take the Netflixvania version of Hector as an example. He's the perfect target for those kind of headcanons, because he's a pretty boy! He's (a bit) feminine! So of course, just from that, you'll have people claiming he MUST be a trans woman. An awful take to call "headcanon", because it's very surface-level, gleefully ignores that everyone everywhere have both feminine and masculine sides to them (and the fact Castlevania is originally a JAPANESE product, have you ever seen ACTUAL anime? Pretty boys and boys who look like girls be everywhere in this media), some men being more feminine while some women can be more masculine, and literally goes back to gender-conforming logic. Something the very concept of transgenderism actually fights against. I mean sure, you have trans women trying to be as feminine as they can, and trans men as masculine as they can, for reasons that might differ from one person to another. But there's also those who don't. Those who simply exist, feeling secure enough in their gender that they don't care how masculine or feminine others percieve them to be. And what about the very cis people who don't conform to what others say they should look like, according to their genitalia?

Headcanoning a character as trans because of the way they look only is great !... To perpetuate gender-conforming mindset and clichés, and be uncomfortably close to transphobic logic (the "we can always tell" crowd who'll think a cis woman is a man because her body, that she has never altered in any way and is only the result of her genetics, is a bit too masculine, for example :) ). So what else you can use to headcanon a character as trans without it leaving a sour taste in other people's mouths?

Their personnality? Well, yes... but also no. It all depends on how you turn it. And in case of N!Hector? Oh boy! ^^

Hector is kind and compassionate... mostly with animals lol, and the devils he creates. He is gentle, can be vulnerable. He doesn't want humanity gone, but he wants them to be kept under control, because on one hand, he doesn't like them because Trauma, and on the other, he's not a bad guy at heart. He is naive, dare I say, emotionally, physically and mentally weak, wich causes him to be compared to a child by actual characters in the show, and a dumbass by the fandom. ^^ And ALSO causes him to get tricked, beaten and abused by vampires (wich makes the fandom call him even MORE of a dumbass for, and side with his abusers because "haha hot women vampire go brr"). Overall, even if he's trying to be tough here and there, and opposes some (futile) resistance sometimes (never going as far as it should've because of Peak Writing), he quickly goes back to being, well, soft (wich is NOT a bad thing in itself btw).

Now there's nothing wrong when you look at his personnality alone, and ignore literally everything else such as the way he was treated by the narrative, the characters, and the fandom itself. But look at this... and tell me it feels trans woman-coded.

Headcanoning Hector as a trans woman boils down to say "i think women are soft, naive, stupid, weak, kind and compassionnate, and men cannot be". It's already a very vomit-inducing take insulting both genders, but then you take into accounts what actually happens to Hector: him being tricked, used, abused, beaten, dehumanized by every character he interacts with and never taken seriously, even by the man who hired him as one of his GENERAL. Oh, and treated like a literal pet, too! Called as such by Lenore herself! And it gets worse. Because the narrative itself sees nothing wrong with that (exactly because he's a man :)). Just... why would you see a man being treated like a pet, not human and not even an adult, and think "ah, yes. A woman." ?? I'm sorry but I can't, in good faith, approve of that. What kind of vision does it mean you have of women and trans women?

So not only headcanoning N!Hector as a trans woman is an insult to women and tells more about how YOU view them than anything else (consciously or not), but it also serves to completely rip Hector off of his masculinity and insult men as well. As if a man couldn't suffer the way he did. As if a man could not be kind or naive without being compared to a child. As if a man had to have short hair or beard or drink beer or whatever you think a man is supposed to be like and how a woman is supposed to be like.

Oh, and special shoutout to that one tumblr user I will not name that literally said "how can you not headcanon Hector as a trans girl. She's literally a doggirl ok"! It's is the most awful take I have EVER seen and I want to throw up all over your blog! Literally, how dumb does one have to be to see a gentle, pretty man being treated like a dog for kinky points and go "not only is this a girl, that's also a doggo! Woof woof!" I swear to God.

Sigh... so, yeah. This far, I have yet to see anyone headcanoning Hector as a trans woman and not making me want to throw up in my mouth, considering how the character is. But there's one more thing! The narrative.

The narrative can also be used for headcanons, and often is. "What is this character and their story about?" "How is the [media] portraying them?". "How are we supposedd to feel about the character/story/actions?" In N!Hector's case, despite him having potential... the narrative is just humiliating him through and through. He gets tricked by everyone, mocked for his harmless personnality, his mistreatment happens out of pure sadism and to elevate the Girlbosses, and he gets used for horny points. He is just a victim durîg the whole show, and when you THINK he's FINALLY going to do something... nope! He vaguely help bring back the Big Bad Guy (wich ends up being useless i swear to god N!Hector's life is joke lmao killme) while falling for his abuser! Getting back at her by protecting her, I guess! ^^

So what was his character and story about? A misunderstood man... who exist only to be used and tossed around and never get justice nor is allowed to fight back. You can't even say he's a plot device because the plot itself mocks him and could have worked well, if not better without him. (Isaac going after Carmilla directly instead of going after Hector and choosing last minute to kill Carmilla while he's at it would have made a little more sense, though he still would have went after the wrong people, but that's another story) Definitely the kind of character I love to see having his masculinity revoked and called a woman! Not insulting at all!

See, it is very difficult to headcanon a character as trans... especially when you don't think about it through. Wich people like that one user calling Hector a "doggirl" did (that was a whole other level of victim blaming holy shit. Shows once again how men's and males' trauma and suffering are not taken seriously enough). What is happening to Hector here happens to many other characters in other medias, and to stay in Netflixvania, it is happening with Alucard as well. Because people are cowards and won't headcanon the big grumpy hairy guy as a trans woman, they have to headcanon the gender-nonconforming character and, by doing so, actually gender-conform him ❤️ (i mean it as a half-joke. you do you, but I think this is a clear proof of how the gender norms have a big place in your mind)

I think I would have less problems with lots of these if they weren't called "headcanons". Let's be honest, many will think of a character as trans because THEY'RE trans and it's their blorbo, and MAYBE think of justifying it further afterward. That's not how HCs work, you're just projecting. And you know what? It's fine! It's not a bad thing in itself! Make a pre-existent character trans if it's fun for you! If it makes you feel better! I mean I'm worried of N!Hector is the one you relate to the most. But it doesn't matter if others don't like it, because it's a content made for you, by you! But don't call it a "headcanon" (or claim it as canon directly, wut) and try to justify it when there's nothing in canon even slightly hinting at it being potentially true, or working, or making sense for the character. Don't call it "headcanon" when you're literally genderbending a character. Please. Think things through.

Also, remember when I talked about a proper headcanon does not contradict actual canon? Well. The male character you call a trans woman going by "he/him" the whole time kinda contradicts your idea. It's as if you "headcanoned" a character who has been seen only being attracted to the opposite gender and in love with someone of the opposite gender as being gay. Sure, you can say that's a closeted trans character... but then you better have solid reasoning for thinking that, once again. Or, you know, you could assume that you genderbend the character for fun (and i don't mean "turn it into a cis character of the opposite gender", i mean keep them trans, but don't pretend to base your vision mostly on canon). Would be less insulting than saying "this weak pretty man is actually a woman because he's weak and pretty, canon told me". I prefer someone who owns up to the fact they don't care about canon and just want to have fun rather than someone who implies they care about canon by using "headcanon" and then give poor and insulting arguments.

I get that lots of people with these headcanons don't have bad intentions and don't realize how fucked up their reasoning (or the simple fact of calling N!Hector a damn DOGGIRL- sorry i'll never recover from that) is, but still. As much as I respect everyone's right to do whatever they want with characters in their own little corner, caring about nothing but having fun, I've been needing to vent about this issue for a while now. Being an ally or a trans person yourself doesn't prevent you from spreading stereotypes, I'm afraid.

This problem of "i'm using poor and stereotyped arguments that is more insulting than anything to justify my idea" could apply to autism headcanons too, btw. And probably other things as well. Just. Please. Think about what you're writing. Think before you talk.

[glitterrosesnzz]

Chalk Dust

i feel insane. here's a 1k word long W/anderer fic.

“I can’t believe I’m doing this…” 

“Hey, it’s your own fault for sassing the professor.” 

The Wanderer glared at Aether, who was sitting in the swivel chair behind the professor’s desk. The Akademiya classroom had long since been emptied of any other students, as well as it’s teacher. Usually, at this time, the Wanderer would be either running errands for Nahida, or simply resting in a tree in the forest. 

Unfortunately, today, he’d been assigned the duty to clean up the empty classroom- a task usually reserved for the teacher themselves. 

The Wanderer slowly released an angry breath of air, restraining himself from sending a blade of anemo at the Traveler’s head. That would get him absolutely nowhere in this scenario, and in fact, would probably add to his wasted time by earning him a lecture from Nahida. Aether spun around in the chair, seemingly unphased by the murderous vibes the Wanderer was mentally trying to project at him. 

“Why are you even here?” The Wanderer asked, crossing his arms, “Just to act useless, as usual? You don’t even go here.” 

“Well…” Aether placed his feet on the ground, abruptly stopping the chair mid spin. “Nahida got worried when you didn’t immediately show up after classes ended like usual, so she sent me to check in on you. I didn’t think you’d be in here cleaning, and I especially didn’t expect you to be doing such a thorough job of it.” 

The Wanderer let out a sigh. Cleaning was in fact the thing he least wanted to be doing right now, but well, if he had to do something, he was going to at the very least do it well. In fact, he was almost done. All that was left was the second chalkboard. 

Grabbing the bucket of water he’d previously set down on the ground, the Wanderer dipped the washcloth in it and floated up in order to reach the top of the chalkboard, ignoring Aether very obviously snickering about the fact that the Wanderer needed to fly to reach. Like Aether would be able to reach this high up either. 

He did his best to put the Traveler’s presence out of his mind, focusing only on getting his job done, so that he could finally leave. 

However, it was only a few moments later that movement out of the corner of his eye caught his attention. 

The Wanderer dropped his wet cloth and zoomed over, harshly gripping onto Aether’s wrists just moments before he could slam two chalkboard erasers against each other. 

For a moment, they both froze, staring at each other. 

“...Idiot.” The Wanderer relaxed his grip on Aether’s wrists, but didn’t yet let go. “I did not ask you to help. You’ll get chalk dust all over everything if you do that in here.” 

“Maybe I just wanted to help.” Aether said, and the Wanderer scoffed, finally letting go of the Traveler’s wrists.. 

“Keep your unneeded sense of heroism in check.” He said, turning away- 

Only to immediately get whacked in the back of the head by an eraser, sending a cloud of chalk dust into the air. 

“Gah- seriously?” The Wanderer stumbled a little, turning back to glare once again at Aether, who was whistling innocently, his hands behind his back. “Of all the immahH- …immatu-hiH- sh-shiH-shit-” 

The Wanderer harshly rubbed his nose, quickly trying to get himself back under control. 

“Oh, what’s this? Do you need to sneeze?” 

“N-nohH-hheH-...” 

 “Careful~!” Aether said, a little bit of sing-song in his voice, “Better hold it back, you wouldn’t want to accidentally get chalk dust all over everything would you?” 

The Wanderer didn’t bother to give the Traveler a response, continuing to harshly rub at his nose as he tried to stop hitching, his eyes flickering with the power of anemo. Despite the teasing way in which the Traveler had said it, he’d made a good point, if the Wanderer was to sneeze now, the anemo energy that would be released would likely spread the chalk dust over the whole room. He’d have to clean it all over again… 

Determined not to let that happen, the Wanderer made the decision to stop breathing. 

After a few seconds with no hitching, he slowly pulled his hand away from his nose, cringing. The itching, tickly sensation was still there, and it was annoying, but at least he wasn’t- 

“Hey, that’s cheating!” Aether said, one hand on his hip, and the Wanderer was abruptly reminded of the fact that there were, in fact, two chalkboard erasers as Aether held up the other one. “It’s not fair if you do something no human can possibly do.” 

The Wanderer gave him a look of utter befuddlement- followed up with a brief flash of panic as Aether started walking closer to him, eraser raised. He quickly started backing away from the Traveler, placing both of his hands over his nose and mouth. Aether let out a small laugh. 

“Looks like someone isn’t confident in his ability to hold back.” He said, patiently standing in front of the Wanderer, who’s glowing eyes narrowed at the challenge. After a beat, the Wanderer slowly lowered his trembling hands. 

In response, Aether reached out and gently tapped the Wanderer’s nose with the eraser, sending a new small cloud of dust into the air between them. 

“Ggh… hh-hAh- hIHh’t–... hH-” Small tears started forming in the corners of the Wanderer’s eyes as he choked back a sneeze, turning it into a false start. “HehH- ngh… h-hH-” 

 The marks along his body were starting to match his eyes and glow in time with his hitching breaths now. …He wasn’t sure he could keep this up for much longer. 

He wasn’t going to tell Aether that of course. 

And yet, somehow, the Traveler seemed to instinctively know when the Wanderer had reached his limit. An arm wrapped around the Wanderer’s waist, pulling him closer, and the Wanderer’s breath briefly caught on a startled squeak as Aether put his other hand against the back of the Wanderer’s head. 

The Wanderer was given no time for confusion as his breath suddenly hitched much more desperately. 

“Hh-ihHH-hH’IsHKiu!! HhiH’SHhkiu! Heh- hH’inKShhii!!” The Wanderer had no choice but to muffle his sneezes against Aether’s shoulder, the Traveler gently fiddling with the Wanderer’s hair while he waited for him to finish. “Hh-hiH’ksh! Heh’Shkii!! Hih- Isshiiu! ‘Kshiu! Heh- hhiH- hH’InKShiiuu!!” 

The Wanderer breathed heavily for a moment, his eyes slowly opening, the glow fading from them. 

“...You done?” Aether asked, and was immediately shoved away. “Hey, is that any way to thank me? There’s a reason we didn’t just have a miniature wind storm in here y’know.” 

“...Tch. You’re a freak.” 

“Would you hang out with me if I wasn’t one?” 

The Wanderer didn’t respond, crossing his arms and avoiding eye contact instead. Aether let out a small laugh. 

“Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

[vampsquerade]

i need some huge konig comfort because im so upset :(

dude of course! i’m so sorry for getting to this a little late, but i hope you’re feeling better being upset is never fun and how long i took probably didn’t help you :c wishing you the best and lord of love

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

König x GN!Reader: Righting Someone’s Wrong

Trigger Warnings: angst with a good ending, hurt/comfort, accidental stalking(?), scars, failed dates, kissing, embracing, anxiety, apologies, threatening language, use of Y/N

Life has a really shitty way of having to balance things within the universe for everybody in the world. Some people tend to get very lucky while others are given the opposite side of the coin. Day in and day out, every second, imaginary numbers would change sequence to infinite possibilities and change the probability outcome. You were convinced it would just stay that way for you forever; today was a day with some terrible odds. Everything somehow, some way, went completely wrong for you. You had been waiting for a date for a whole hour and a half, and they’d never arrived.

You felt so stupid for waiting there so long just for nothing. It made the man who was patrolling the streets very curious about you, even more so now that he saw your depressed facial expression. The man sucked up any thought that told him to not interfere and at a staggering 6’6”, walked into the café you’d been in. “Hey, do you mind if I join you?” the gentle giant asked. Your head whipped up and you wiped at your eyes with a napkin, “O-Oh…no not at all…” you say. The man nods and takes his seat in front of you, giving you a gentle smile from beneath the mask he wore over his mouth to conceal his identity while on patrol.

“Are you feeling alright? You seem very upset right now…I may be a stranger, but I do wish to allow you to have someone you can trust and talk with,” the man said as he tapped on the table with one finger. You remain silent, trying to recompose yourself for a moment before speaking. “I-I…I’m really not feeling alright…to be honest,” your voice has become a little strained as your throat tightens, “because my date totally bailed. And I feel so stupid.” The stranger looks at you with the most gentle, soft, and sad eyes you’d ever seen as he reaches out for your hand now. “That’s upsetting—I’m so sorry that happened to you…um…” he becomes bashful.

With his other hand, he fidgets with his hood for a moment before recomposing himself, “Would you mind if I was your date?” he asks, squeezing your hand tighter. Visibly flustering, you stare at him with wide eyes, “You want to make this a date? Truly?” The man nods, laughing nervously, “B-But if you don’t it’s okay! I will understand if you just need your time alone.” His voice, while anxious, is still as gentle as you expected it to be. A small laugh escapes your lips when you see how nervous he is, feeling a sense of ease at the sight. “Well, I’m not opposed to the idea,” you say, smiling.

Squeezing his hand, you see the man’s sad eyes twinkle with hope that he can actually make you feel better. He was determined to make you feel better and that’s what cheered you up a bit. “So…give me your name? I can’t just go on a date without knowing what to call you,” you say, teasing him a little bit. “O-Oh! Yes, okay…my name is König. A-And you?” The stranger you may now identify as “König” said, asking you the same thing. “You can call me Y/N…thank you for actually agreeing to be my date today…that’s really sweet of you for a stranger…” you say, complimenting him for being nice enough to be your date.

You could tell he was getting flustered, blushing enough to where his whole face was red. “W-Well, it’s my duty to be there for the people whenever they need me to be and…well, you looked like you needed someone to be there for you.” König says, wanting to make you feel appreciated and cared for. Now it was your turn to get flustered, and since he was able to see your face better, his perceptive sniper’s eye was able to catch the visible scrunch of your face as you pursed your lips for just a moment. “Heh…made you feel all warm, didn’t I?” König asks in a playful manner, tapping on the table again to see if you’ll repeat the rhythm like you had earlier.

Laughing softly, you shake off his flirting a bit and recompose yourself. Tapping against the table once more, the sad look in König’s eyes seems to go away now when he hears it and watches you do it. “Do you normally tap on tables like that?” The question is innocent nature, just wanting to get to know him better. “Ja, sometimes—it’s just a force of habit,” König sighs softly, looking at you with a different gaze now. One more, nervous and gentle at the same time. “Now I will admit…I have been watching you for a good bit…but not in a creepy way, okay?” he confesses, making your eyes widen just a bit.

Not a word comes out from you, and yet you decide to allow him to keep talking. Based on the expression he’s got, he’s desperately having a battle in his mind if he could keep saying what he was trying to tell you. “I was watching your expression change from so excited, to nervous, before becoming depressed once you realized what your date did…” König continues to confess. Hearing he had been watching you for the entire time and now seeing he was doing this to keep you company and make you feel better, all those feelings of dread washed away. This was a man you could feel safe with, despite his sudden appearance.

“I’ll admit, it sounded…pretty creepy, but—!” you begin to speak, stopping once you see König’s sad eyes somehow become sadder, “but, it was because you didn’t finish explaining. Am I allowed to ask what your line of work is?” you then ask, wanting to know more. He then perks up when you ask about him more, “I can’t give all the details, but we can just say I’m a soldier…from Austria. Where? It’s a surprise—well…” he trails off, laughing to himself a little, “more like a secret.” König teases before standing up. You’re a little confused when he does, but when König offers his hand to you, it just makes you smile.

“Come on, let’s change your plans up—last minute style. I know a good spot to enjoy someone’s company. It’s pretty romantic too, but a little far,” König says. Taking the chance with another random stranger today, you go for it by grabbing his hand and standing up. Taking your things with you in your other hand, you step out of the café together and begin to walk down the bustling city streets. You have no idea where König’s leading you, but for some reason, a lot of trust is being put into him right now. This man probably has the capability to fucking kill you considering his imposing stature…and yet he seems a little too nice to do so.

Maybe because you don’t pose a threat at all.

Eventually, König has led you to a nearby park, one you particularly liked due to its proximity to a forest with a trail that branched off into it. “Oooo, getting me to a secluded location, eh? What, gonna kill me?” You tease, making König look at you in disbelief. “What? Why would I do that? You’re too cute and nice to kill—you’re not one of my targets, so I’ll spare your life,” König says. His tone is a little too cheerful when he says this, making you feel a little nervous now. “Nobody should ever get that excited at the thought of telling someone they’re not the target he’s supposed to kill. Wait—he fucking said what?” Instantaneously, your brain speaks to all nerves and cells in your body; fight or flight seems to kick in.

“So your work is dangerous…” you whisper softly to yourself. “Not only that, but it’s a big secret. Be good for me and don’t say a word, okay?” König says, his voice still eerily cheerful. Your stomach drops a bit more once, making you stop dead in your tracks. “Hey, what’s the matter? Did I scare you? I’m sorry—truly I didn’t mean it…” König asks as he stops walking himself. In this moment, you turn yourself away from him to process what was going on. “Y/N…? Please look at me…” he pleads you softly, eyes filled with an apologetic gaze.

You slowly do as you’re told, your eyes meeting König’s. “l won’t bring you harm, okay? I can see you look scared but you’ll need to trust me—I’m a military man,” he speaks to you in a gentle tone, “and that’s all I can give about this. I have values, and don’t believe in the harm of someone who doesn’t deserve it.” König then cautiously reaches out for you, as if reaching for a frightened animal. Not a single muscle moves, keeping you completely frozen in place. Large, gentle hands then hold onto your shoulders in an attempt to let you know he was about to embrace you. He continues to move, pulling you into a hug.

You’d expected König’s body to feel cold and off putting as well as give you more reason to run away right now, but you don’t. He’s extremely warm in the cold autumn air, relaxing you enough to feel safe once again. You would stay this way for a whole minute, as König then tries to comfort you as best as he can to calm you down. “I promise you that I would never want to bring you harm,” he continues speaking, stroking the nape of your neck a little to reassure you. You then feel him take a deep breath before sighing shakily. It’s as if König was preparing to continue fighting for your trust.

“I…I was bullied a lot, as a kid. I can understand that fear of being hurt by people who barely know you…” He says, confessing to you a reason that would at least prove he won’t do anything to hurt you. You look up at König from his chest, and he looks down to meet your eyes. “If anything, I won’t let anybody hurt you. I want to protect you a lot, okay? I will do everything to make sure that nobody hurts you,” he says, voice filled with determination. König’s grip on you becomes tighter and more protective, clearly taking this seriously. Your body seems to heat up a little when he’s practically devoting himself to your safety.

Even if he had scared you, completely by accident, König wanted you to know you’re safe. “Th…thank you…I trust you to keep your word, alright König?” you say softly. König, feeling a little brave to trust you with his identity, then lowers the mask over his mouth so it rests on his chin to seal the deal. He’s got a few scars on his face, with one that lightly passes over his soft, plump lips. One of them appears to have just recently healed, scar protruding and a fleshy pink color. “Has anyone told you how handsome you are?” You suddenly flirt, making König blush a deep red. “N-No…because nobody’s ever really seen my entire face,” König mumbles, leaning down a little so you could get a better look.

His eyes were still soft and sad, giving you a look within what makes him care so much; pure affection. König feels a deep connection to you, and very much wants to keep it. “Meine Liebe…” he whispers in a hushed tone, plump lips slightly quivering from apprehensive breathing, “please let me be the one to care for you. I will comfort you and give you all the love and attention you deserve.” Your eyes stare into König’s deeply due to the proximity, yet only for a moment as they slowly flutter shut once you lean in to kiss him. His own eyes widen, becoming much softer as they fill with a profound sense of comfort for you. The two of you were only strangers, on a new date after your previous one failed, and yet you managed to have a heart to heart.

König’s eyes would flutter shut, breathing becoming slightly heavy as he kisses you back. His hands find their way to your back, pulling you into his body. Your own hands do the same, and the need for oxygen pulls the both of you away gently. Your eyes open simultaneously, and a soft breeze brushes past the surrounding trees. “I’ve never kissed on the first date before…that was sweet,” you whisper softly against König’s lips. He gives a gentle smile, “Good. I’m glad you liked it that much…are you feeling better?” König speaks to you in a delicate manner, concerned for how you’re currently feeling in the moment after what he had said. You smile simply smile and give him another peck on the lips, “Personally?”

“So much better.”

[ihni]

Imagine, a charity auction - you know, those ones from the movies where people bid on another person and it's like a "date" or a picknick or whatever. I'm not sure about the setting or the story behind it (school? basketball fundraiser? country club stuff?), but Steve goes there (is dragged there, perhaps) and he's Over It already and thinks it's stupd, but he's got money and it's for charity so whatever, he figures he'll do his duty and bid on someone and maybe have a meal and exhange awkward small talk with whoever, and then go home.

Anyway, to his great surprise, Billy Hargrove is one of the people who have agreed to be auctioned off for charity (unknown to Steve is that the charity is for abused kids or animals, and Billy feels Strongly about that, okay?). And like, he's wearing a good shirt, unbuttoned to his chest, and tight jeans and he's smiling with white teeth and his hair is perfect and Steve hates him suddenly, is filled with rage about this guy, his bully, standing there and smiling and thinking he's gonna bring in a lot of money and probably, like, score with whoever buys him.

And the announcer must know that Billy will bring in the most money, because she saves him for last, and when she presents him she wags her eyebrows and says that whoever buys Billy will have him all to herself, for the whole evening, and that he's up for almost anything and like, Steve wants to throw up a little.

But then an idea hits him and he thinks, what better way for payback than to bid on Billy? If he wins, Billy will be his for the whole evening; he can make Billy do whatever he wants - like rearrange the garage or clean the upstairs bathroom with a toothbrush. Or maybe, just maybe, he can demand an apology for that time when the guy gave him a concussion - he doubts that it'll be sincere, but just the possibility of watching Billy Hargrove growl out an apology, however insincere, is enough to have Steve's heart speed up.

Okay, so the most likely thing to happen is that Billy will laugh in his face and refuse to do anything Steve tells him to do, but at least if Steve wins, Billy won't be going home with any of the women here. Won't get laid, if that's what he's counting on. And honestly, even if Steve won't get to live out his petty revenge fantasies, it'll be worth it just to ruin the guy's plans for the night.

So Steve checks his wallet, and then waits until the bids are trailing off - they're already higher than for anyone else, and perhaps not so strangely, it's mostly adult women who have been bidding - and then he clears his throat and doubles the latest bid.

Everyone turn to look at him, but Steve only has eyes for Billy. His eyes are very blue in the light of the spotlight where he's standing, and wide as if startled. The smile has fallen off his face, but he quickly puts it back when people's attention drift back to him for his reaction.

The gavel falls, and Steve has just won Billy Hargrove for the rest of the day.

Now. What happens next? It could be a kind of pick-your-own-adventure kind of thing.

Romantic/fluffy: They are awkward at first, but they eat their food and Billy really IS kinda different like this, when it's just the two of them, and maybe Steve asks about why he even did this, and Billy lets slip that he really DID do it for the charity, that he doesn't care about the ladies but the CAUSE, and maybe he thanks Steve for the bid. Says that it will help a lot of kids/animals. And that thank you startles Steve, because who knew that Billy could be polite, huh? Human, almost. So he doesn't go through with his plans of making Billy work for it, but instead they just hang out for the rest of the night and like, they CLICK, you know? And in the end Steve confesses that he was GOING to make Billy do menial work as payback, and when Billy laughs and asks why he didn't, he just shrugs. "I don't know," he says. "This was ... better, I guess." And Billy looks down and then back up and licks his lips and nods, too. "It was good. Thanks. For not making me scrub your bathroom with a toothbrush." And they laugh, and then maybe they drink a little more and i don't know HOW but once they're both a little tipsy and interested and such, they kiss, too.

Angsty af: Billy 100% definitely expects the worst. He heard what the announcer said, too, and he's seen the leering way these women looks at him and he KNOWS it's a meat market, barely veiled prostitution, okay, so he knows what's expected of him by whoever wins. He's been psyching himself up for it - he's gonna sleep with whoever wins him, and he'll make it worth their while because while he won't enjoy it, it's what's expected of him and besides it's for a good cause and it means that he can somehow help kids/animals who are being abused so he'll just ... do it. But then STEVE is the winner, and Billy is so confused. Because he knows that Steve hates him, he's never made a secret out of that ... so why did he bid on Billy, when he has to know what kind of auction this is? (Spoiler alert, it's not REALLY that kind of auction, but of course Billy believes it is) Obviously it's payback, right? Right. So Billy squares his shoulders and figures he's gonna take this, too - if he can sleep with some old lady, then he can definitely stomach Steve and whatever the guy has in store for him (because at least Steve is a GUY, and also maybe possibly Billy might have had a tiiiiny crush on Steve since he rolled into town. Okay it's not so tiny. Okay it's still ongoing. Fuck). It's not gonna be like in his fantasies, maybe - Steve still hates him, after all - but he'll take what he can get. And so when they get somewhere alone and Steve starts making awkward smalltalk, maybe Billy is so set on what he's sure going to happen, that he decides to take the first step. Get it over with. Rip the bandaid off. So he turns so he's facing Steve and is like "Okay, so how do you wanna do this?" Steve looks confused and is like, "What?" Billy continues, powering through, "How do you want me? On my knees, or ...?" or maybe he just drops to his knees, to show that he's not gonna back out, he's not a pussy ... Cue a very confused and appalled Steve, but not for the reasons Billy probably thinks. Bad continuation; Steve goes with it, because hell, how many chances are he going to get to shut Billy up this way? Less bad continuation; Steve is horrified and pulls him to his feet again and they talk and clear the air. Billy being like "... but I thought you bid on me for payback" and Steve's like "Yeah, I was gonna make you clean my bathroom, you idiot!" (and Billy's like "... I'd rather suck your dick.")

Somewhere in between the two: Steve DOES go through with making Billy do menial work at his house as a means of payback. And Billy knows that he doesn't have to do it, that he can just up and leave, but he figures a) he kinda owes it to the guy for breaking his face that one time and also b) it's for charity and Steve DID shell out a lot for his payback so Billy will play along. So he rearranges Steve's garage, with dusty heavy boxes and stuff. He cleans the bathroom ... with a goddamn toothbrush, because apparently Steve is mentally eight years old. Steve, in turn, didn't expect Billy do ANY of the things he came up with, and is confused as to why Billy hasn't punched him in the face and left, yet. So he comes up with worse and worse things for Billy to do; hand-wash his dirty socks. Crawl in under the crawlspace under the house to remove old building material. Clean the drain under the sink. The whole time, he's expecting Billy to snap and just, stop. But he doesn't. So when Steve tells him to climb onto the roof and remove the bird's nest in the chimney and Billy's only reply is to ask for a ladder, Steve snaps (because that's dangerous, okay? he could DIE). "What the hell, Hargrove, why are you doing this??" "Doing what?" "Everything I say!" and then they shout a bit and it all ends with Billy saying that it's his way of saying sorry for what happned at the Byers' house, and Steve is stunned because he did NOT actually expect an pology. And of course Billy is embarrassed for not understanding that Steve didn't actually expect him to do all that stuff, and Steve feels like shit for making him do all that stuff when apparently the only reason why he did it was as a way of an apology. And by then it's pretty late so Steve offers for Billy to have a shower at his place and he'll get a late dinner started (they never even got to the eating part, since Steve didn't think Billy would even stay around for the FIRST task). And they have a late dinner together. And talk, like two civil people. And actually learn a bit about each other, after that.

(I'm sure there are like 20x more events that could happen, too. I just like the charity auction plot and I want like ALL the variations.)

Thoughts?

[velvetures]

alr alr alr so hear me out just HEAR me out right

Gaz. Right, right. Showing the reader he's a certified munch. Right. Idk how it would go. I imagine he maybe helped them out with something and they owe him a solid and then bro just like "fuq all this sexual attention bruv. Bring dat arse here and let me sip on ye like sum fine wine" or sumn. Idk. BUT PLS CONSIDER IT PLS I LOVE THIS MAN SOO MUCH

Tip the Driver

summary: you go above and beyond the call of duty and it earns you a certain operator's constant attention and adoration. he's insistent that he pays you back... and you're utterly shocked at what he suggests.

t/w's: canonical violence, blood, GSW, Gaz eating pussy like a champ, fem-reader, fem oral receiving, dirty talk, fingering, female orgasm, male orgasm, public?fuck,... probably missed a bunch..

MRAP's didn't make for the best office... but it was yours whether or not you liked it all that much or not. Between the .50 cal bolted to the roof and the unmoveable windows, it made for a shitty view just about everywhere you received orders to go. Be it sand and dusty nothingness or abandoned and flaming city streets with car alarms blaring after a bomb strike. Your "office" hardly proved to be comfortable, but no one could contest your ability to drive the damn thing and keep the men inside of it safe.

The most important of all was Task Force 141 on the frequent occasions that your specialist skills were necessary for getting the boys in and out of a tight situation when a helo couldn't be afforded. It was a pain in the ass job that hardly anyone ever wanted... and you couldn't say that you'd initially volunteered for it either. You'd been forced after multiple vehicle squads declined to work with the 141.

Nothing ever went to plan with them.

It all happened far too quickly.

What started as a simple insertion by vehicle turned into nearly inescapable hellfire raining down on the sides of your armored truck. Banging heavy brass and lead rounds against the walls and drowning out the sounds of Captain Price’s orders. The whole plan went to shit the first second an RPG took a nose dive less than fifteen feet in front of your truck; stalling the movement of the small convoy and pinning you between two rocky cliffs pinched off and slowly closing up even tighter.

One moment you were doing the only thing asked of you: drive Task Force 141 through the gap to the small terrorist encampment on the other side, and hide yourself until they needed a quick escape. The next you were knelt down in the back, tightening down a tourniquet around Kyle Garrick’s thigh and preparing with shaky hands to pack a steadily bleeding bullet wound. There was hardly a second to think about anything, much less second guess your best instincts after Soap and Ghost hauled Gaz back to the truck and made a very harsh demand that you “pack him tight”.

Honestly, you didn’t even know what that meant. But Gaz -in all his inhuman strength- had enough patience and discipline to ignore the pain he was feeling to walk you through exactly what it took to keep him from bleeding out before you could get him somewhere for real medical attention. From cutting his own pant leg open to handing you each tool or material necessary, Kyle couldn’t have been a better patient to learn with. But it didn’t make you feel any better for looking up at him every few seconds and seeing him practically chewing on his own belt to keep from screaming or cracking his teeth.

“Doin’ good sweetheart…”

“That’s it, keep it -fuck- keep it tight like that…”

“Can’t be shy with me. Need you to be tough, m’kay?”

Every little praise or motivation he gave made eased your worries, but damn if you didn’t feel the littlest bit guilty for needing a wounded man to give you reassurance. It should’ve been the opposite. You easing his nerves. Telling him he’d be okay, and that there wasn’t anything to worry about. But there wasn’t a single thing you could do except following his directions to the letter, and hope that he didn’t pass out before you could finish up.

“For a gearhead, you’ve got nice hands…”

“Aren’t you a little too pretty to get stuck drivin’ us around?”

The longer you stayed in the back with Gaz, trying to mop up the blood pooling on the floor and around him, the more invested he became with you; not just what you were doing to make sure he didn’t die. Naturally, you’d known Kyle well enough to say you were acquaintances but it was never significant enough to say more than a friendly hello and goodbye when you caught each other’s attention. But with each milliliter of blood lost, Kyle Garrick began losing that well-mannered silence he was so often teased about. Enjoying the sight of you that close to you, and mentioning even the smallest little goofy detail he could muster up in half-consciousness.

“Gaz… you need to rest,” You’re hardly able to get the words out with all of the anxiety you have building with each bullet lodging itself in the side of your truck. “Can’t have you leaving us…” He just chuckles with a little wince. Leaning his head back against the back of your driver’s seat with one hand resting over his thigh and the other instinctively resting on the grip of his pistol still tucked against his hip.

“Not leaving if you’re around… s’pecially now that i’ve got your attention..” He gives a shy little smile. “You’re a really pretty for a MRAP driver… well… the only pretty one…” His eyes cut down and away from yours. “But still…”

You’d have been mush with such a cute admission had it not been for the firefight happening just outside your vehicle. And it was the limit of your power to ensure that Gaz was stable until there wasn’t a shot fired and you heard a nearly breathless all-clear from Captain Price outside. When the back doors swung open, the rest of Task Force 141 took in the sight of your blood-soaked gear, red-stained hands, sweat dripping down your neck, and Kyle slumped against you sleeping off the exhaustion with a fairly decent field dressing.

They were impressed.

Enough so that Price ordered Ghost to drive and let you sit in the back next to Gaz who had unconsciously laid up against you like a body pillow of sorts. Your mission had been busted by bad intel and a tip-off. It led to all of you regrouping back at base.

The 141 hauling Kyle off to the infirmary to get legitimate treatment, and you back to the garage where your truck had been shot to hell and back and needed repairs… If you could make them.

It was a good thing you’d been in a MRAP… but even they could only take so much abuse before bulletproof panels started bending and cracking under pressure. On first inspection you’d seen the pinholes of light shining from the garage lights through the walls onto the blood-stained floor in the back. And that was an entirely different struggle you’d been attempting to overcome. Seeing the dark red remanence of Gaz’s injury puddled and dried all over the desert tan painted floor. You’d been so upset by it that you attempted to scrub it off by hand since nothing else had worked. For two days you scrubbed at it… your squad mates passing by to yet again see you down on your hands and knees with a scrub brush, hot water, and bleach. But you’d hardly made a dent in the unmistakable stains by the time that Gaz was given full release from the doctors on staff.

Fuck, the only reason you knew that was because he’d been the one to come and find you still scrubbing at the back of your truck.

The light tap on the open back door halted your frenzied scrubbing. Looking up from the pink-tinged bubbles surrounding your hands, you came to meet Kyle standing there a bit stiffly with a somewhat curious look on his face.

“Sorry about that…” His apology isn’t exactly a joke, but you can tell that a part of it bothers him. “I’m normally not that messy.”

“You hardly have a reason to be sorry.” You feel responsible for reassuring him. Having it in the back of your mind that without saying it, he’d go on believing that you were inconvenienced by the whole ordeal, instead of deeply, and for some reason -very- emotionally protective. “It’s the least I can do to let you bleed in my truck.”

Kyle chuckled, stiffly moving to pull himself up into the vehicle. He sat down even more slowly with his boots facing away from the stain you’d been scrubbing at. “I guess you have had at least a couple fingers shoved inside my thigh… maybe we’re even?”

He earns a laugh from you.

Probably the most genuine one you’ve let out since the day he got injured. Gaz can’t help but be reminded of just how pretty you are in that moment. Kneeling there with a mop bucket and suds of soap surrounding your knees with baby hairs sticking to the sweat on your forehead. He’d not been too under the influence to exaggerate just how pretty he thought you were. And the fact that your job entailed driving on an equal skill level to being part of the presidential motorcade certainly added attraction points.

That little crush he nursed was ignored as much as possible. But remembering small flashes of your worried face looking over him a few days back haunted every waking moment of his day. While a little crush on a pretty girl was one thing, adding fuel to that fire was burning Kyle’s self-control into ashes.

He wanted to think there was some way of… flirting with you, he supposed. Giving a hint that he wasn’t just coming to waste time in the garage with you because of how well you shoved gauze into the hole in his thigh. But he could only think of one decent idea… and damn if he didn’t think it was the most feral thing he’d ever dreamt up. Seeing you just sitting there like that enticed his pain-med-laced thoughts with enough eroticism to even make Soap’s head spin like a fucking top.

“You feeling okay Gaz?” The sound of your voice breaks him from the thoughts.

His nods, one hand sliding over the heavily bandaged spot on his thigh under his pants. “Yeah, just thinking about something…”

Your eyebrows quirk up. “What’s that? Must be important for you to be staring off into nothingness like that.”

“Just how I’m going to pay you back for keeping me alive.” He smiles, lazily drawing his gaze down to look at you. His forearms resting on his thighs gently, looking down at you sitting just out of arm’s reach on the floor. “And I think I know how to do it.”

Kyle’s wide stance and downright confident swagger merely sitting there makes the slight bleach smell in the air pale in comparison to the dizziness his heavy gaze does. From the black boots, to the jeans, hoodie and black baseball cap, he’s nothing short of pure masculine energy. And fuck does he know it. Screaming felt like an appropriate response to his comments, yet the only think that could come out of your mouth was a nervous giggle. Soft and a little hesitant. Flashing your nervous anxiety like a white flag right in Kyle’s face.

“Somethin’ funny?” He smirked a little, adjusting the bill of his cap and tugging it down closer to his eyebrows. You shake your head ‘no’, trying to recover and sober up quickly.

“Oh, no… please, do tell.” He presses smoothly, dark eyes brightening with what you can only compare to champagne and chocolate diamonds glittering in warm, cocktail bar lighting. Enticing… rich… and oh-so-pretty.

“Just, sounded a little suggestive is all.” You smile, saying it with an uncertainty that wavers between it being a joke, and a question as to his seriousness. Trying to keep the ball in his court as not to foul up on whatever kind of situation Kyle came here to trap you in.

If it’s naturally possible, his eyes darken. “What if I was being a lot more suggestive?” His upper body leans a little closer. “What would you think then?” You feel your own stomach twist into tight knots.

“I’d think you’re crazy.”

Gaz laughs. Actually laughs out loud, and grins down at you.

“Crazy, huh?” He reaches a hand out, fingertips touching the underside of your chin and guiding your face up to meet his. His huffs a little chuckle, almost mesmerized by you and the way you think. “Well, I might just be,” He answered quietly.

“But that isn’t going to stop me.” You swallow thickly, feeling his thumb brush over the swell of your bottom lip ever so softly.

“Stop you from doing what exactly?” Gaz chuckles lowly again, giving a moment to look at the blood stain on the floor and the hell of a time you’d been having trying to remove it.

“Showing you the one other time I don’t mind making a mess.”

***

You can’t be sure if it’s just how time suddenly bends around Gaz, or if you just can’t care enough to keep track of it. But you find yourself sitting naked in the drivers seat of your own MRAP, pants hanging from one ankle, shoes lost somewhere in the cab, and your panties shoved into Gaz’s back pocket. Be an hour or five, you’d already lost count of the times Kyle gave you the same praise as he did when you were helping patch him up.

Only this time, he was muffling your screams of pleasure with his hot mouth pressed against yours and fingers so deep inside your cunt that it was almost too easy to make you come for him. Your slick dripped from your clenching pussy into the fabric seat cover, soaking Kyle’s whole hand and your ass.

“That’s it… such a pretty pussy…” His low rumbling praise against your ear feels like electric static running down your spine. “What a lucky man… getting to shove my fingers in it, and see how wet I can make you.”

Lithe digits massage against the squishy front wall of your cunt, while his other hand doubles to put pressure on your stomach while rubbing at your clit with his fingertips all at the same time. You’re helpless to do more than let your head heavily thump against the tinted window behind you and squeeze your eyes shut to keep from utterly losing your mind. Kyle Garrick has turned you into a whimpering, messy, slutty-looking mess. And god is he more than happy to let you know just how good it looks from his angle.

“Fuucckk yesss..” He groans, kneeling closer to your pussy. Resting his cheek against your inner thigh and pressing a sloppy kiss to it when he’s able to draw yet another orgasm from you. Rending your legs truly useless and unable to fend off his attacks in any meaningful way.

It’s exactly where he wants you.

You’re pinned back against your seat with your knees on either side of your head and a dizzy look on your face as Kyle blows a teasing breath against your swollen clit, staring down at you damn near drunk off the sight alone. It makes you yelp, but with all of his methodical preparation, the only thing keeping him from sinking his tongue into your wet hole is wanting to see what other sounds he can drag out of you without touching that sensitive collection of nerve endings. Gaz couldn’t get enough of seeing your legs limp and easily maneuvered out of his way so that nothing more than your submissive little expressions and dripping cunt are on display.

“Told you I don’t like making messes…” His tongue licked lazily at the crease of your thigh, teasing himself with just the slightest tase of your arousal. Edging himself with the full prize of tasting all of his hard work.

“But I want you to look this slutty all the time, pretty girl…” He grinned darkly.

Finally lowering himself to your core, he curls his tongue through your folds with a satisfied groan. Purposefully burying his nose against your clit and sucking at your release until he’s certain he won’t need to eat for the rest of the day. You’re too wrecked to squirm anymore. Merely staring up blankly at the celling as he tongue rolls over your clit and dips down to gather up your slick before it drips down onto the seat again.

“Oh my god…” It’s a miracle you can utter a single word.

Kyle squeezes at the muscle and fat on your thighs in reward for finding your voice, if even for just a moment. That’s good… he thinks, knowing you can take this much pleasure and not give up when he’s still not satiated with the taste of your come sliding down his throat. He’s nearly lost all composure of himself as well; but damn if he didn’t just want to tie your legs to the driver’s seat and steering wheel just so he could lap at your cunt for hours without you interrupting him. Wishful thinking for this only being the first time he’d been able to taste you. But he was certain there wouldn’t be a single day in the future he’d go without at least the slightest tease of your pleasure lingering on his lips.

“One more,” He demands, teasing your hole with his thumb as his tongue traces your inner lips languidly. “Feed me baby…”

There’s not a moment’s hesitation.

You nearly come on command at this point. So overstimulated but desperate for more that when Kyle gently grazes his teeth over your clit, everything unravels in a fuzzy lost of your eyesight and a shock of sensation so strong in your body that Gaz manages to actually make your legs shake one last time. It’s so damn strong tears flood your eyes, and it’s not until you feel him slowly pumping a few of his fingers in and out of your weeping cunt that you realize he’s actually helping you ride it out by stroking at your g-spot tenderly and kissing your inner thigh.

He looks just as lost in the moment as you feel.

His mouth parted and still lapping at your folds like he’s possessed to do nothing else. Your arousal slicking the entire lower half of his face, and his baseball cap turned around backwards with a light grey t-shirt that he’d have to let dry before getting out of your truck due to the cum splatters covering the front. As if that wasn’t enough to turn you on seeing Kyle Garrick on his knees and pussy drunk off you, the large wet spot just to the left of his zipper made your weakened muscles clench around his fingers. Kyle follows your line of sight, chuckling quietly and gently palming at his softening cock through his pants with a small shrug.

“It’s my favorite…” He explains soft but very honestly, eyes flashing back to where he begins slowly removing his fingers from your cunt. Eyeing his own fingers and how your walls accommodate them before sinking his own fingers in his mouth to finish ‘clean up’ on his favorite messy job.

“Now we’re even?” You ask, a little dazed and reaching a hand out to find his for some stability and reassurance. Kyle laughs softly, helping you readjust your legs and lifting you up to sit in his lap to ward off the after-sex chills raising up on your bared skin.

“I suppose so,” His wetted lips press against your temple and linger there reverently for a minute or two.

“Or… we could… keep doing each other favors?” His voice lowers a bit, sounding far too unsure for your liking.

“I don’t want to do favors, Gaz.” You smile.

“I just wanna do you.”

[gojosbf]

hi i just saw ur post about how gege forced his audience to confront what happens when you reject death and i 100% agree w you. i feel like some people who are reading jjk have forgotten that jjk is not about gojo finding a happy ending, jjk is and always has been about the larger themes of systemic oppression and how harmful it is, and about how love and the loss of youth is in direct opposition to things like duty and sacrifice. it feels like people have lost the larger plot along the way while being swept up in the idea of 'i love this character so much' and can't look at the story as a whole if anything bad happens to that character. idk i feel like i'm in the minority of loving 261; gege certainly isn't without faults as a writer but the story implications and the reinforcement of all those themes was rly well done i think! i would have loved for gojo to come back and i'm very sad that yuuta's been forced to do what he did but it all feels very earned imo like it doesnt feel (to me) like gege is just making this up on the fly

exactly!! i will never say gege is the greatest writer ever (looking at all the characters he had to kill because he didn't know what to do with them and how he handles his female characters) BUT he does write great plot twists. of course everyone was going to hate the chapter when it first came out, i did too!! that's my gojo how dare you treat him like that?? but then as a tragedy enjoyer, someone who loves pain and a consistent theme and parallel plays it tastes sweeter in a bitter wine way the more you sit with it. we can go back to the beginning of the manga the theme from there till now in this latest chapter it just has one main motive: "doing what you need to do to win, to save the people you care about." so even if it sucks atleast it sucks good.

[lightlycareless]

I saw this video and it made think of Naoya and Naohime. I can imagine she learned that vocabulary from Naobito lol

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTNdX5wP2/

Hello!!

Omggggg another video that isn't here anymore jfc I'm so sorry 😭 but from what I was able to recall it was a (with a daughter or granddaughter) and he says a bad word and she ends up saying the same thing lol it was kind of funny tho 😂

I wrote a little something inspired by it :) though I ended up writing it mostly on Y/N's perspective, cause she's the one that usually hangs around the kids the most (though a protective Naoya does appear, as well as Naomi)

warnings: none. Naobito is a bad influece tho. but overall domestic fluff.

also: a little bit of context regarding Naobito and his relationship with your and Naoya's youngest child.

Happy reading!!

It should come to no one’s surprise that Naobito is Naohime’s biggest, worst influence for a thousand reasons.

And why wouldn’t it be? Honestly, they spent almost every day together, with Naohime constantly following him everywhere, or more like Naobito bringing her along everywhere, citing that his favorite granddaughter had to be there for whatever important clan meeting he had for the day.

By his side when watching anime, or just spending the whole evening sleeping, a little Naobito on the making! It was only a matter of time before she began to mimic him…

Which was a very frightening statement for you and Naoya to ruminate on. To have a child so involved in serious manners is just the tip of the iceberg; both just want her to live out her childhood as happily as possible! 

But, oh, well, at least his father had the decency of not drinking in front of her—yet, this following incident finally made you and Naoya realize how spoiled Naohime had actually become, and how urgent it was for the two to step in.

It happened right after dropping off your children at school, with Naohime by your side since she was too young to attend yet (another matter that worried you—Naobito wanted to homeschool her, you and Naoya wished otherwise. Will this debate ever end?) accompanying you to your newest duty.

Apparently, the Zen’in were to meet a highly prestigious client, and you, wanting to do your part in making a good impression, headed right over to the kitchen to help arrange such an important dinner.

Stress to make this moment as perfectly as possible inevitably befell the staff, especially those that were still new to the (dubious) work ethic of the Zen’in; thus, it wouldn’t take long before one of them eventually crumbled, making a mistake that was easily fixable, but with the pressure of doing everything right the first time, believed otherwise.

“It’s ok, don’t worry—we still have more ingredients, right?” you quickly intercept, the cook nods. “See? Nothing to fret about! Now we just gotta—"

Little Naohime rarely involved herself in your activities, always kept occupied by her toys or any other activity you thought of beforehand, but something about the anxious complains from the staff members struck her with familiarity, like she’s seen this before somewhere else, and knew exactly what to do…

Cue your worst nightmare becoming a reality, having you inwardly screeching, skin pale at the notion of her imprudence.

“Stupid monkey!” Naohime says, with no hesitation, no second thoughts, nothing—just a reckless, albeit innocent, replication of her surroundings.

“Naohime!” you quickly retorted, shocked to hear such an awful sentence coming from your adorable daughter! “Where did you learn to say that?!”

But your daughter, instead of providing an answer, just continued giggling, thinking of your reaction to be a joke, as if you were entertained by her actions and not genuinely upset; it’s how Naobito reacted whenever she did that, after all, obviously the culprit behind it all.

“No, young lady, this is no laughing matter!” you insist once more, she does not budge. “Naohime—you will apologize to the staff right now for saying those awful words!”

“Lady Y/N, it’s fine—she’s just a child. She doesn’t know what she said.”

But that’s exactly what made this situation not fine. If anything, it made it even worse! Her laughter representing the sour realization that you’ve been too lax on your daughter, perhaps too carefree, freeing her of any necessary limits and discipline simply because she was your youngest maybe, your last child, the one you and Naoya had more time to parent together and yet didn’t seem like it.

You should’ve expected something like this to happen when Naobito got interested in spending time with his granddaughter. Yet, far from growing concerned, deep within, you and Naoya were happy that finally his family was retroactively trying to get along with their children, if only one of them…

But those days of carefree endearing were gone, you needed to put your foot down, and quickly.

“Naohime, if you do not apologize, we’re going to have problems.” She smiles, shaking her head playfully, nothing but a game for her you sadly conclude. “Alright, I don’t like doing this, but you leave me no other choice.

So, carefully grabbing her hand, you decided to go with what she considered the worst discipline ever, one appropriate for her age and situation: a timeout.

A decision she received with loud whines and cries, attempting to free herself from your hold but being unable to do as much as lightly tug at your arm, forced to accept the fate awaiting inside her bedroom; 5 minutes to think of the gravity of her actions, understand them, and hopefully, a genuine apology.

“Mamaaaaaaaa.” She would call from inside, pounding at the door. “Mamaaaaaaa!! Let me out!!”

It hurt you to hear her crying like that, your poor baby, the light of your life, one of the many reasons you loved being a mother—but such, it also reminded you that if you truly loved her, then you would discipline her when needed and set up limits that would protect her.

She was just a child and should act like one! Not copy dubious behaviors from people you’re going to start distancing from! Just as your husband would come to support…

“Care to explain the things you’re teaching my daughter?!” Naoya is quick to reproach his father as soon as you inform him of what happened. Somewhat afraid of Naobito, you usually let him handle these types of matters, but never alone, standing by his side as your protective husband gave him a piece of his mind. “I will not allow you to spend any more time with her if you’re just going to be a bad influence on her!”

“Ah, it’s nothing but a stupid expression! Just something to say to people that are being a bit foolish, motivate them to do better, nothing more!” Naobito dismisses, as always. You press your lips together, seeing the anger building up in Naoya’s face.

“Regardless of what it was, as his father, I do not want her replicating such behavior. So, you either behave for the first time in your life, or I won’t allow you to see Naohime ever again!”

“So now you’re threatening me?” Naobito chuckled. “She’s a much better, promising daughter than any of you ever were. A shame you don’t see it.”

You sigh; it’s nothing but obvious that he’d been drinking, kind of. Alcohol only made his defensive, intolerant nature worse, and subsequently, impossible to engage in a conversation with him.

But it’s not like either expected any different, he’s always been like this and would continue to do so until forever it seems. Thus, after brief consideration, you and Naoya decide to follow through with what both thought best: spend a few days with your father in hopes of giving Naohime a breath of fresh air, a break from the estate, as well as the opportunity to get along with the rest of her relatives, ones both hoped she’d take after.

Something she clearly didn’t like, that much Naomi was able to assess after seeing the tantrum her little sister was throwing.

“No! I don’t wanna leave, no! No!” Naohime cried, fists closed tightly as she thrashes all around her bed. “Mama and Papa hates me!”

“It’s hate Naohime—and no, they don’t hate you, peanut.” Naomi says, carefully sitting by her side and placing her hand behind her back, hoping to stop her before she either hurts her or herself. “You just did something they didn’t like, that’s all.”

“No, I didn’t!” she protests. “I never do bad!”

Naomi raises an eyebrow; so young and already so sure of herself. Well, can’t say they aren’t related.

“You do realize you insulted the staff, right? The same people that feed you every day? How would you feel if someone from our family said the same thing to mama? Or papa? Call them stupid.”

Naomi frowns, disliking the mental image of her parents being belittled—or being told anything ugly! It’s one thing what she does, and another entirely different when pertaining to others. Her parents are off limits!

Regret soon fills her senses, but too embarrassed to admit her wrongdoings, she responds with the only phrase she thinks works the same.

“I don’t wanna leave…”

“…Just apologize, Naohime. That’s all Mama and Papa want from you.” Naomi says, patting her back once more. “And stop mimicking all that the old man does, ok? He’s not good for you.”

“But he’s funny…”

“Papa can be… funnier if that’s what you really want.” Naomi couldn’t believe what she was saying, but here she was, defending her father!

But it was true, in a way; and necessary to stop her baby sister from turning into a small Naobito.

“No, he’s silly…”

Naomi chuckles; well, at least she’s not easy to fool.

“Mama and Papa love you and want nothing but the best for you.”

“…I know.” Naohime eventually admits, finally giving way to the first step of her so-called redemption, an apology that the staff warmly received, her parents briefly taken aback, yet happy.

…

If not curious as to know why she’d done so in the first place; perhaps a sudden change of heart?

“I just spoke to her, you know. She’s still capable of hearing and understanding.” Naomi says. “Don’t give up without trying.”

“Oh, I know.” You lament, and the notion you’ve been dragging along of being the worst parent ever sank deeper into your mind. “I just… I guess I was just shocked to hear her say that! Something so terrible, and of course, how close she actually was to Naobito. I knew they got along, just not to this extent!”

“I should’ve known, my love. They spend the whole day together, and she rarely listens to us when she’s with him!” Naoya frowns, feeling equally incompetent. “Don’t solely reprimand yourself, I too was at fault.”

“Well, if you must know, she was really upset at the thought of you guys being angry with her.” Your eldest added. “And honestly, you aren’t such bad parents. Maybe a bit… embarrassing, but nothing she couldn’t tolerate and appreciate. She’s still your daughter at the end of the day.”

You and Naoya look at each other, as if silently discussing what your daughter just said before smiling, quickly acknowledging her words as truthful—that no matter what happens, regardless of the issues that would naturally arise as time went on, and everything else… Naohime was still your and Naoya’s daughter: the energetic, joyful, but most importantly, caring girl you raised her to be.

She just needed guidance from time to time, like everyone often does. Some more than others, but even that didn’t lessen your children before your eyes, stop you and Naoya from seeing them as what they really are: perfect.

To be given such wisdom through your daughter Naomi made the two also realize how much she’s grown. The once adorable, rosy-cheeked baby who followed you everywhere you took her was now a woman in her own right: one that is supportive of her parents, as well as a good older sister both always knew she’d be.

Ah, time sure flies by. Best to enjoy these moments while they last.

“Thank you, mochi.” You smile, approaching to give her a quick pinch on the cheek, a gesture that has her quickly flustered, tensing her shoulders as she looks away, hoping no one had seen so. “For being a good sister to Naohime and a good daughter to us.”

“Mom, seriously—can you stop with the names… I’m not a little kid anymore.”

“Hmmm, really? You still act like one though?” Naoya snickers, she rolls her eyes.

“Don’t you two have more important matters to tend to anyways?? Like Grandpa?? He’s been telling me non-stop how excited he is to have us over since it’s been so long since he last saw us and to let him know if there’s any food I’d like to eat over there so he can buy it! And I just promised Naohime you guys wouldn’t take her if she apologized, so…”

“Oh, shit!” You gasped, looking over to Naoya, wide-eyed just as he was, at the notion of unwittingly getting into another problem just as soon as you got rid of the other! “What are we going to do? We just can’t cancel on my dad; you know how upset he gets! And he’s been feeling awful as of lately too… I think he just figured out that Naohime prefers being around your dad over mine!”

“Naohime is going to be upset with us again… and your dad too.”

“Not if you bribe her.” Naomi suggests. And even if it were an idea that would essentially label the two as bad parents, you end up taking her proposal—call it a white little lie, a necessary evil, whatever it took to keep your family happy!

It may have been easier to not spoil Naohime that much from the very beginning… ease Eiichi, your father, from sending her toys whenever one crossed his path; Naobito from badly influencing her, and Naomi from trying to be the cool sister (though she’d always deny it), the one she could always rush to whenever none of the former were collaborating with her, however that may be done.

Well, there’s only so much that could be done in these circumstances—it is simply the blessing curse of being the youngest child.

:') cool sister Naomi; I can't believe that one day I'm writing her as a baby and the next day she's Naohime's favorite hahahah 🥺 they grow up so fast....

Well, now I gotta turbo those tiktok requests because I fear I will forget them and THEN I WON'T KNOW WHAT TO WRITEEEEE

Anyways, this was a treat to write, as always. I love it when you guys indulge in my domestic stuff 😭 the Naohime acceptance makes me very very happy 😭😭😭😭😭💖💖💖 thank you so much!!! (though I gotta say, I hope we didn't come out as a horrible parent here hahah I don't know much about kids but I know for sure it's impossible for them to be perfect angels soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo 🥺)

Now, take care, and hope to see you soon!!

[patibato]

[Bitter Sweet Sixteen] 002-A28 - Stand by "ME"

Momiji: Huh…?

Nanaki: …Failed?

Ushio: …

Muneuji: …

Kiroku: …Wh …

Akuta: —Huh, I failed?

Even though everyone else passed, it's just me?

……Wo~w.

Muneuji: Sensei, I do not agree with that grading.

Akuta: …Muneujii…

Muneuji: I tried applying Isotake's actions to the criteria you set out, and in my opinion, there are a few discrepancies.

Sakujiro: Oh? A grade from a student's point of view? That's rather brazen, but interesting. Do enlighten me on what is wrong, and how.

Muneuji: With both being selected as candidates, and going on the tour, I didn't have any heartfelt expectations, and yet—

Carried along on Isotake's energy, I wound up participating. There are some parts I regret about it.

But I completed all the work left in my hands. I accomplished all that and more.

I fulfilled my duties and became passionate. It had been a while since I enjoyed myself so much.

The funny faces he showed me on sleepless nights were very amusing.

Nanaki: Sakuchan-sensei, can I say something too?

…I started getting annoyed with people a few days in. I felt like I didn't care what happened anymore.

But… Akuta. When looking at what a dumb, reckless idiot he is—

I feel like the things I worry about are stupid. I felt like I was an idiot for trying to look cool.

It's fine to be more unpresentable. It's fine to not give up on connecting with people-

It's fine to eat the omelette rice he got from the convenience store by putting natto on it…!

Akuta: Natto omelettes are good…

Nanaki: That's how he made me think. It… might be different to Sakuchan-sensei's opinion.

Kiroku: I-

…Isotake… accepted… my strange art, and sensibilities… without… denying… me…

And… compared to me, who didn't finish the lantern… …Isotake… is different—

……He didn't… give in…!

The success, of the festival… was definitely because… he kept on… going… and opened a path… with his own power…

And he… wore the same t-shirt… for three days… straight…

Akuta: Guess I didn't get changed much…

Kiroku: …I wouldn't, be able… to do that… it's incredible…

Sakujiro: …I see, so you all have your own thoughts on this. I understand.

Kurama-kun, do you have anything to add?

Ushio: …

Akuta: …

Ushio: I wonder. To be frank, nothing much comes to mind—

Akuta: Doh!

Ushio: He's blatantly egotistic, blatantly stupid, and a full-fledged loser.

He's a dumbass, I never understand what he's saying. The way he acts is nonsensical—

But, I think it's fine for a kid to put his all into being one.

Akuta: …Hey, are you complimenting me?

Ushio: With my whole body and soul.

Sakujiro: —Is that all?

Ushio: …

Sakujiro: Does anyone else have more to say?

Muneuji: I do. …I'm just, in the middle of calculating what.

Nanaki: Umm… there's that. …You know, that.

Kiroku: … …

Ushio: Yeah, we've got nothing.

We can't think of anything. Let's give up.

Akuta: -…Aaah… got it…

Well, c'est la vie. What can't be done can't be done.

Thanks for searching so much for me, guys! I love you. …You too, Sensei.

—Well, I'll be off.

Momiji: W-wait! Akuta-kun-

Sakujiro: …Mwaha…

Momiji: Sakujiro-san?

Sakujiro: Mwahaha… hahaha…

AAH HA HA! FUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Kafka: …

Akuta: Huh… no, what…? D-did I not time my exit right…?

Muneuji: Have you gone mad, Karigane-sensei?

Momiji: (His true nature's coming out… Even though he said earlier that he acts relatively normal at school.)

Sakujiro: That's RIGHT! Leaving now is MUCH too soon, Akuta-kun! Sit down! I'll aim this chalk right for your brow!

Akuta: Awawawawah, g-g-g-got it!

Sakujiro: Please listen closely, everyone.

Though I have a purpose in life, I do not possess a dream.

I've none of the glittering, shining hopes, dreams, or passion that you youngsters emit.

Not even when I was your age. Not before, nor ever since.

However—

When I heard Akuta-kun's speech at the festival venue, with his ego on full display, giving his straightforward and honest thoughts…

I felt as if something was suddenly circulating through my body.

I learned through firsthand experience that someone's passion could be transmitted into me, in which nothing had ever naturally occurred.

To put it simply, it "touched my heart"… that's what I would call that phenomenon.

For Tourism Ward Mayors, spreading "affinity" to those with no relation to the area is your duty, your work.

Imparting new passion to travellers will change it from a stranger's area into their own—giving meaning to the moment they experience that is our ambition.

And so, I have established a new grading criteria just now.

"Passion Evangelist"—

Isotake Akuta-kun. I offer you ten thousand points for that talent of yours, and along with that, I endorse you as the leader of the Day Team.

What do you think, Young Master.

Kafka: …

Akuta: …

Kafka: I approve.

Momiji: …!

Akuta: … For real?

…

Hoo—

All Five: HOORAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

Akuta: Well, my place is this way, so…

Muneuji: Right.

Akuta: …

Ushio: …Aren't you going to go?

Akuta: No, I'm just reluctant? It's a weird feeling!

Kiroku: ……That's… rare…

Muneuji: …

Nanaki: With all of us passing like this… I can't help but feel like we did something bad to the egg.

Kiroku: -…

Akuta: Cheer up! Don't you suppose it's enjoying itself at a beautiful lady's house or something!?

Nanaki: Y-yeah, yeah! I mean, its shell is sturdy! I'm sure it's fine. Yeah.

Kiroku: …Mhm…

Ushio: …Anyway, me and Muuchan live this way, so. See ya.

Muneuji: Hold on.

Ushio: Hm?

Muneuji: …I have something I wish to discuss with you all.

Akuta: Huh, what what? You sound serious, what's up?

Muneuji: I recalled this during Oguro-san's explanation earlier. That day, at the old school building—

I saw the Principal.

Ushio: Huh?

Nanaki: Really? Why would he be there?

Muneuji: I don't know myself. At first, I assumed he was simply on night patrol.

However, the reports said there were no injured parties. And then, too, I assumed he managed to escape one way or another like we did.

After all, at the online closing ceremony held afterwards, the Principal gave a speech as usual. However, try to recall.

That day, the speech was given through voice alone, with his camera off.

Kiroku: …Now that, you mention it…

Nanaki: So to summarise, you think that has something to do with the egg?

Muneuji: Correct. …There's also the matter of that mysterious slimy substance, and Ohno's disappearance.

Nanaki: …Right. Ohno-kun… They still haven't found him, have they.

Akuta: Yeah~ if I'd gotten a proper shot at that time, it could've been used as evidence…

Kiroku: …M… maybe you… didn't see… right.

Ushio: Muuchan's got good eyesight, even in the dark. And he absolutely doesn't lie.

Nanaki: But of all people, the Principal would have no reason to go out of his way to bring that extraterrestrial egg and sticky stuff to the old school building.

Muneuji: …

You… may be right. Perhaps I'm being too suspicious.

However, I felt it best to tell you all about it. …Please keep it in mind.

Nanaki: Got it. Thanks for letting us know.

Kiroku: …ank, yo…

Akuta: —Alright! With that said and done!

No point staying here forever. I'm starving, so let's head on home!

Nanaki: Yep. See you tomorrow.

Kiroku: … Bye… bye.

Muneuji: Let's continue getting on tomorrow.

Ushio: Let's go, Muuchan.

*tapping and bubbling*

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Masterlist

[chaifootsteps]

curious question - are the 'it's wrong to want bad things to happen to Valentino' crowd applying the same logic everywhere?

I ask because (for those who watch both hh & hb) I've seen a consistent pattern of violence being wished on Stella and (occasionally) Blitzo (no prizes for guessing what the thing these two characters have in common that has got fans wishing violence on them)

I mean wasn't there like a whole comic on the hb subreddit awhile back of Stolas slapping Stella across the face? (not to mention the not so hidden undertone of misogny in fanfics where Stolas & Blitzo have a fun old time calling her every name for 'bimbo' -or worse - under the sun) And a comment or two about how good it would be to see Stolas commit domestic violence/kidnapping/whatever else against Blitzo because he apparently deserves it?

and yet when the character is Valentino, who is written as a rapist and abuser on purpose (by which I mean Viv meant to do it, whereas it's anyone's guess if she realized Stolas was also that in HB or if she decided it didn't count the same as Valentino as far back as Murder Family given the very next episode was devoted to making Stolas sympathetic even if he was still allowed to be flawed at that point in time) suddenly parts of the fanbase is insisting it's wrong to hate him or want to see him gone?

I'm sure this is just a thing specific to this fandom, I doubt they do this w/other shows because it feels so clearly a result of Viv (and maybe Raph, idk) making such a point of how much they like Valentino. in any other scenario it would be understood that hating this character is the intended audience reaction and that fiction is a safe and cathartic means of wanting to watch that moth demon get squashed for everything he's done

They're most definitely not applying the same logic everywhere. By their logic, it's not only perfectly fine, but a person's moral duty to wish harm on both characters like Stella (or else you're a disgusting abuse apologist) and real people they don't like (Idolomantises, me). But when it's a character they like...well, you see where we are.

Hypocrisy doesn't even begin to cover it. Their logic literally changes by the minute.

[rynnthefangirl]

Ranking Aegon IV's family members (excluding his bastards) by how much I think he hated them:

13. Daeron I - he did name his son Daeron, and I think Daeron's destructive ego and war/glory hungry nature would appeal to Aegon.

12. Daena - while she herself wasn't one of his nine favorite mistresses, her son with him was his favorite kid, so I think while he didn't love Daena, he certainly did not hate her, and may have even liked her. He'd respect her rebelliousness and impertinence.

11. Elaena - Elaena is sort of a more toned down version of Daena, so I think the same qualities that make Aegon not hate Daena would also make him not hate Elaena.

10. Daenaera - I think Aegon probably had no strong feelings about Daenaera at all. He didn't like her, but I don't think she would offend him enough to hate her.

9. Daeneyrs - his favorite legitimate child, which basically says nothing. I don't know much of anything about Aegon's relationship with her, but she is still Naerys' child so I'm sure he did not care for her at all.

8. Rhaena - Rhaena would remind Aegon of his sister, and Aegon fucking hates his sister.

7. Baelor - Aegon hates authority, and strict/dutiful/pious people, so I think he would not care at all for Mr. "Imma lock my sisters in the Red Keep to preserve their chastity and shut down all the city brothels because the gods say sex is bad." Also Baelor sent him away from KL to keep him away from Naerys, which rare W for Baelor but another thing Aegon would hate him for.

6. Aegon III - I think he would have been pretty indifferent to his uncle were Aegon not the king. But Aegon was king, and so was the ultimate symbol of authority, as well as surely brought up if not brought in when it came to Viserys' punishing his son. Not to mention Aegon being named after his father's beloved brother, I'm sure he felt constantly compared to his uncle in terms of personality and also how much Viserys loved them. So as a result, I think Aegon absolutely resented his namesake.

5. Larra - I think Aegon definitely didn't realize how much he hated his mother. He probably blamed his father for her leaving, and displaced all his anger onto Viserys. But Aegon has severe mommy issues from Larra leaving, and he definitely resents the hell out of her even if it's somewhat subconsciously.

4. Naerys - Aegon hated his sister-wife and was such an abusive piece of shit to her. Poor Naerys, she really did nothing to deserve that. But she'd represent his fathers authority over him and his lack of freedom, as well as him just having complete contempt for her piety and meekness.

3. Daeron II - it's pretty well established Aegon hated his son, so much so that he blatantly favored his bastard Daemon, spread rumors about Daeron being his brother's bastard son, and then legitimized all of his bastards on his deathbed, proceeding to doom Daeron to spending his entire reign fighting rebellions. As well as being Naerys son, Daeron was just everything Aegon hated -- dutiful, honorable, peaceful, tender.

2. Aemon - Aegon probably spent his whole life being compared to his perfect brother. Their father's favorite, a celebrated knight, renowned for his skills as well as his goodness and honor. I just know that every single thing Aemon ever said or did made Aegon's blood boil. Aemon could give food and money to the poor and Aegon would rant to his buddies about what a goody-two-shoes suck-up his brother is.

Viserys II - poor Vis. He has his first child at 13, has to raise him on his own from 17 onward, and it also so happens that said child was basically born a sociopath. Any parent would struggle to raise someone like Aegon, but throw in Vis being only 13 years older and also having to singlehandedly raise 3 children, manage his brother, nephews/nieces, and a post-Dance kingdom, all while dealing with his own damage.... I think he was definitely a very harsh, no-nonsense, absentee father, and the source of Aegon's burning hatred of duty and responsibility. Plus, ya know... Aegon probably murdered him... not sure how much more you can prove your hatred than that.

[madstronaut]

prepareth thineselves for another doozy of a ramblecommentating

obligatory alphalist link:

the pining. THE MOTHERFUCKING PINING IN THIS STORY is enough to power a standard size nuclear plant imo and madstronaut is here to do her civic duty as a staunch supporter of the environment and fighting fossil fuels, yes, truly the main reason i read smutty/yearny fic-

Reading: Christian Woman by @kneelingshadowsalome

“You don’t know how it even happened, but you became friends with a foreign man visiting your city.” 

this is basically reverse tinder iykyk

“You feel warm and safe with him, lost inside a soft bubble you quickly create in the corner table of a cellar cafe.”

 this very aptly desscribes how this story makes me feel. i cried the first time i read it through fully; just made me feel so many emotions 🥹🥹🥹

Perhaps it’s the dimly lit environment or perhaps it’s just him, but you have one of the deepest conversations ever with this mysterious man.

i hope everyone experiences the happy accident of a spontaneous deep conversation with a stranger - feels like God/the universe just gifting you a random act of kindness

“Well… I don’t do twerking, but yes, nuns are allowed to dance.” girl you about to do a lot more than that very soon 

You can see he hasn’t skipped a leg day either, and immediately chastise yourself for checking out his butt in the coffee queue.

*when God sings with his creations, will not König's ass be part of the choir*

You know it’s an attempt to make you forgive his choice of career when he reveals to you that his best mission was when he saved thirty women from sex trafficking. And it does make your heart crack open a little.

just speaking personally quite a heady experience to have someone attempt to better themselves for you but way too easy for this dynamic go from sexy/flattering to emotionally off-kilter - how does the phrase go? with great pus-power comes great responsibility

Actually, you catch him looking at your breasts, scanning your body and cherishing the tender spot between your collarbones more times than you can count. They’re quick, stolen moments, so harmless that you choose to stay quiet.

🥰🥺🥰🥺

He listens to your every word with a softening glow in his eyes, a shimmer that spreads across the table and makes you feel warm all over. fucking LOVE THIS LINE

König always softens in your presence... You always tense up in his. 

Your face is flushed, and you blame it on the overcrowded cafe. You feel both safe and in danger with him, and it must be the virgin inside you talking.

this is such a great description of how a good ole crush feels - “you feel both safe and in danger with him”

 It’s bubbly and lively and colourful, just like your friend; it’s the opposite of König, the special operations soldier who’s dark, intriguing, and intimate, just like the dimly lit cellar cafe you meet him in secret.

total sidenote but since I was just recently there - you wanna talk bright bubbly cafe next to dim cellar cafe - bedford cheese shop next to irving farm coffeeshop on irving place off union square in nyc fits these descriptions exactly lol

"Soldiers are crazy. I once dated this peacekeeper,” your friend continues in her usual chirpy way.

why did the following description make me think of john cena peacemaker, who does indeed own a fleshlight in the show 😂😂😂

And at times, hearing about all the things your friend has gone through, being an onlooker to all that heartbreak and pining and loss, has managed to strengthe your resolve. a whole moooooood

“No, seriously. We’re talking about fistfights and broken bones. Dating apps would explode. People would get killed.”

we all need a friend like this 😂

 If anything, you’re scared of men, and you loathe the dating world. You’re put off by shallow commitments and one-night stands and getting ghosted and God knows what else.

omg it me????

You always told your friend that Jesus Christ is the most stable man you’ve ever met, and you will stick with him.

recalling all those worship songs nicknamed “Jesus is my boyfriend” songs in youth group growing up😂😂😂😂

“Stable? Excuse me, but didn’t he start a riot or something at the temple? Are we talking about the same dude who lead an uprising against the Romans? Hung out with whores, raised corpses from the dead, fucked around and found out until someone nailed him at the cross? Stable my ass!”

I want to banghang out with this Jesus tbh amigoingtohellfortypingthatmaybesavemeJesus😉

Your friend's enthusiastic grin turns into an uneasy, pitying smile when she realises how deep into this man you actually are. 

i knew she was a goner when she started talking about his hands

If you're chosen by God, your friend is chosen by the Devil, that's for sure. like i said WE ALL NEED A FRIEND LIKE THIS 😂

There’s no chaos and no guns and no tall men with big dicks, no Austrian war criminals trying to seduce you and then discard you after their deployment ends. 

There’s only a man with a kind smile, warm eyes, and a nice, husky laugh. Some good coffee with distant notes of chocolate and perfectly civil conversations about European philosophers and the crisis of modern thought. 

WHY NOT BOTH?

Sturdy walls support you; they have held you for centuries, and the crucifix above you has given hope to so many people before you. The ever-safe embrace of your faith envelops you, and you can always trust that you are loved, even when you’re flawed and incomplete. 

Even with indecent thoughts, you can pray for mercy and ask for forgiveness. Even if you have impure urges towards your Austrian mercenary, you can still pray for him... It’s the least you can do to repay the kindness he has given you.

i appreciate how fleshed out our nun reader is <3 i found myself in a weird limbo of wanting her to remain true to herself while still navigating her faith (as someone also on a post(idk tbh?)-faith journey i find her spiritual self-wrestling very relatable and familiar)

You don’t want to draw the Lord’s attention to you while your hand travels down beneath the sheets, your thoughts wandering to a certain god-like soldier with eyes like burning ice.

probs goin to hell for this (but im on tumblr so im already here??? lmao) but S i r if u invented the whole concept u can at least watch and give me pointers/tips

And that’s ok - physical touch like that is ok. Holding hands is not.

truly the absolute dirtiest sluttiest thing you can do fr fr let me say it once again with my whole chest 👏HOLDING👏HANDS👏IS👏FOR👏 SLUTSSSSSS👏 (it's me, the slut, im the slut)

It finds you in silence, envelops your tiny palm completely, squeezes you softly and emanates so much heat that a cord of fire shoots across your arm and straight into your heart. 

i remember my first innocent hand holdings/cheek kisses and they felt EXACTLY like this, reading this felt like salome went digging into my brainfolds and pulled the sensations out and put them in writing 🤯

The only thing you ever craved for was another slice of cake. omg nun reader your innocence is adorable all the better when watching it break

“I’m sure you’ll find some other girl to… hold hands with,” you say, hating how bitter and self-pitying you sound. holy self-sabotage, batman - NUNREADER DONT DO THISSSSS

“I’m sorry too,” he laments, but the corner of his mouth curves slightly up. “So sorry you wouldn’t even believe…”  excuse me while i mop myself off the floor; melted right off my chair

You wonder if he’d pay you a visit if you told him where you sleep. You wonder if your single bed would creak if he tried to make love to you on it... You wonder if you could muffle your cries when you clenched with him inside you. If he’d groan too loudly when he reached his peak…

nun reader can i interest you in an alternate, similarly unpaid career trajectory of…*drumroll* SMUTTY FIC WRITING???? pls i will send u an ao3 invite and comment on every 5th syllable of your stories and be your 2nd-biggest personal hypebae (first one being her own bff who would be over the moon ofc)

The back door is always open too because some of the nuns are smokers.

im deeefinitely picturing nun!aubrey plaza from the little hours below

“Of course not. I will pray for you every day,” you smile with a good amount of affection. It has the same effect as saying something like “I want to blow you right here on this street” because your Austrian giant gets visibly excited. spit my fuckin tea out at this, fucking hilarious

the giant soldier who now carries a piece of your heart with him. You wonder if he even knows he owns it. 🥺🥺🥺reminds me of old crushes/lovers who broke my heart. did u know how much you held when you had a piece of it? steadfastly not thinking of the ones i broke too🤪

The morning prayers and mass are a chore and bring you no comfort, and the usual dawn bliss is gone.

i have often heard it said both in a spiritual and practical context that when your peace leaves a place, you should pay attention and leave with it and it’s still a very relevant and wise piece of advice imho

But at the same time, you know it must’ve been the Lord who brought you together. There must be a reason for God to make you two meet, you refuse to think it’s only because He wishes to tempt you. There must be a bigger plan; the connection, as sinful and carnal as it is, has to serve some higher purpose. 

tw for churchish talk so pls skip if its not your cup of tea but without getting into all the fucked up stuff that is the monstrosity of evangelical churchianity, personally speaking one of the earliest places (and most constant sources) i learned about self-worth and compassion and love and extending it to myself and others was through people of faith (i know this might be ironic/offensive to some because believe me i have also been there in being traumatized/antagonized by ppl of faith as well but trying my best to hold all our different experiences and perspectives in hand to be able to see listen and understand the good the bad and grey and everything in between in a nuanced way, anyway story of my life); i wish i could offer similar encouragement i heard to nunreader - omg, can we instead focus on the verses/stuff in bible like Christ coming to set us free, not keep us chained to laws, God is love, loving God and others are apparently the two most important things in the faith and everything else rests on these two, also there is a shitttttton of smut in the bible coughsong of songs, the book no one ever preaches aboutcough and also i dont think the supposed inventor of sex hates sex, anyway ending my shittylittle fauxsermon/rant here but end of tw, back to the fic~

And you wonder if you’re going mad, because your most sinful thought is that you actually see God in him. i know reader is deep in the cups of churchthought but this is honestly one of the most beautiful things ive read; i want to (and imho i do) ‘see God’ - see something divine, beautiful wondrous heavenly full of love and joy and peace and gentleness and kindness and all that other stuff from that galatians bit i dont recall now- in the people I love too

You decide to hold on to this thought: that you were meant to meet so that you could come to know God through each other. cough once again trawling through some old memories resurfacing from my churchish days but apparently one of the meanings of the original hebrew word for to know in the bible also meant to have sex with, i am 1000% serious👀👀👀

You wear your everyday clothes to the café, and König says nothing about your sudden moral choice, only gives you another longing, enamored once-over.

recalling an old convo with a guyfriend when we were discussing/joking about modesty and clothing and i joked that the ultimate level was a nun habit/outfit - in complete seriousness though he turned to me and said to a man in lust/love, the right woman has nothing she could wear that wouldn’t tempt him - including a nun outfit - and ive never forgotten what he said lol. I joked about ankles sticking out and then of course we dove into a deep discussion on the existential nature of feet fetishes. in hindsight, apologies to anyone nearby we may have traumatized/offended that june afternoon in washington square park

You hate it that the bright, playful air of your meetings is gone, and your heart is tearing itself apart in your chest because the only thing you wanted was to spread joy into his world. Even the Lord seems disappointed in you being so cold-hearted, and you can’t bear to see His sadness and suffering in König’s eyes.

all he has to do is sneak inside your heart and take the place that belongs to God. You don’t even feel the difference as he makes himself at home. 

Well, actually, you do... It’s like your Christ’s love and mercy have finally come to flesh and blood before you. They're materialized in the man sitting opposite of you, bouncing his knee excitedly and grinning like the most innocent little devil on Earth. 

peak yearning right here. also i think salome captures thoughtprocess of nunreader so well in her eventually assauging her Intense Catholic Guilt™️ by basically equating König to Jesus/God, the only man nuns are allowed to simp for (if anyone is offended by the near-constant blasphemous shit in this post - tbh my whole blog - pls say a prayer for me lol)

“I–I can’t just escape from the window.” my SISTER in CHRIST, you just gave away your whole escape plan LMAO

But everything feels so right that it can’t be a sin – if it is, it just so happens to be the most natural, most divine thing to do too.

nunreader i am cheering you on with little party hats and confetti bombs in spirit-

Everything’s so tight and earthly; everything’s so… there. Visible... Touchable.

very into how nunreader is feeling herself here. yes my queen get ready to fucking get ittttttt

And König has seen you without makeup all this time, so what on earth has possessed you to lament the fact that you don’t own a single case of lipstick? You’d kill for a few sweeps of mascara, too, just to bat your lashes at a silly man.

i am restraining the urge to dive into the screen into this story with my makeup kit to Give Reader A Mini-Makeover (i fucking LOVE those scenes in stories/shows/movies and also for me makeup is art and the canvas is my face/body and i enjoy perfecting my art on the daily- totally forget over the pandemic how much i enjoyed putting on makeup before going to work)

“Here, kitty, kitty…” why is this extremely goofy and sexy at the same time? peak König vibes tbh

Whenever you’re with your sisters, the feeling is pure, pristine love, not a surge of complex emotions and thrill like it is with König.

why not both, my sister, why not both? something something love is a many splendored thing - shakespeare probably

You walk the streets with a flower in one hand and his palm in the other. this is the cutest fucking thing ive ever read so far i am biting my pillow to shreds~ also König handfeeding strawberries to sis at the restaurant?? someone call 911 for public indecency???? hot damn and you were worried bout HOLDING HANDS???

He's nervous, too... Your cruel soldier is nervous, and kind, and shy because he's pressed against you. every girls dream 🥰🥰🥰

instantly getting hard from a first kiss does feel very könig-coded, do not @ me

You hear whistles and whoos in the distance, some men yelling, “Let’s go!” and “Get a room” while they pass by. not me also joining in-

The world revolves like it always has, as you choose a crucified man over the one who’s flesh and blood and holds you through your pain. not me getting together a petition.org straight to Jesus to cut our sister some slack-

“The world tests us in many ways... But Lord never tests us. He only loves us.”

on this note i remember being briefly fascinated by nuns/priests as a young madstronaut - mostly fascinated by these women living sans men in such a male-dominated world/space and foregoing sex/marriage (anyway little did i know of religious patriarchy and such then) but knowing what i know now, that under all the collars and habits and wimples are still regular people/human beings - i wonder how many IRL Christian Women fics are being lived out right now somewhere 👀coughBEFREEMYSISTERScough 

He just now crossed your mind when you remember how he used to smell: of salty seabreeze mixed with intoxicating musk, the scent of excitement and safety all in one.

smellsandbells are my bread butter and jam! research has also shown the sense of smell is strongly linked with memory too and i can attest to this

The tallest man you’ve ever seen steps out from the dark in full combat gear, and while you can’t see his face because it’s covered with a draping black hood, you recognize it’s him simply from the way he moves. 

do not resist dear sister, no one can when COD men deck themselves out in full gear, its simply not physically spiritually mentally emotionally chemically possible, cold scientific fact, biblical gospel, incontrovertible truth, in this annotated research paper i will-

You must look like a frightened deer because König mistakes your horrified look as sweet, simple concern.

“Don’t worry... They have it much worse, I assure you,” he says with his usual grin – you can hear it from the way he says it that he’s smiling. okay König fucking would say something like this lmao READ THE ROOM SIR but also sister has it d o w n  b a d if shes able to recognize him just by the way he moves and “hear him smiling” iykyk

So when he asks you if there are any motels or a bed & breakfast nearby, you say you know just the place. sir i see right through your schemes and i am giving my 100% certified stamp of approval tbh i wouldn’t have even put it past him in this fic if he stabbed himself in a nonlethal area so sister can see some skin without ICG in teh way (Intense Catholic Guilt™️)

You suppose this is what your friend calls a happy trail... 

And it does make you very happy. 

you and me both sister, you and me both

“Pay no mind to that,” he says thickly and completely without shame. “ pay no mind? my brother in christ you are giving free handouts (trying not to let my brain rot away thinking of double entendres here)

“I wrote to you, Braut Christi... Many times. Never sent the letters… They’re still in my room, at the base.” sir sir if i can guess at the contents of some (most?) of these letters…may I ALSO interest you in an alternate albeit unpaid career trajectory of smutty fic writing-

You wonder if hearts can find each other, even through a distance, and if you’ve felt the urge to go to the flower he gave you at the same time König has gotten the desire to write another letter to you. It’s bittersweet, like this whole thing between you two, the mystery that both brings you together and rips you apart. 

damn this is peak writing right here. this rivals published writing ive read, all my standing ovations, slow claps, and hats off to you salome~ i go through tons and tons of fic in hopes to read sentences like these and stories like yours ❤️❤️❤️honestly their whole exchange with sis kneeling by him as he falls asleep is peak yearning/tenderness 

also nunreader’s “why exactly does König like me so much, is it because of any other possible reason other than myself” is peak relatability - once again restraining myself from grabbing reader through the screen and giving them white-board scrawled peptalks breaking down why they are amazing and worthy

He must be getting better if he’s behaving like this... The man’s insufferable enough when he’s uninjured, but now that he’s getting pampered, he’s somehow even worse. 😂😂😂 sis finally gettin the memo

Your only summer dress resides at your parent’s house as a relic from the past, a token from your life before sisterhood. this is true, i recall reading that once someone enters the convent/monastery they basically get given one nun/priest outfit and like maybe a backup one when the main one gets washed? my new yorker fashionloving ass could never

 “No, I’m not. I’m just some woman you bumped into in the street.”

“That’s exactly what an angel would say.”

😂😂😂

You sigh: it’s useless with König, hopeless, like trying to wrestle with God. No matter what you say or do, he always turns it against you in the sweetest possible way. as someone with the near-useless superpower of getting weird inside baseball bible/sunday school/youth group jokes/references however vague in modern lit/culture when they appear i appreciate the “wrestle with God” reference, peak research vibes

also the last line here really smacks of the nicer interpretation of what the abbess told sis: “God doesn’t test us, he loves us” <3

 There’s nothing sexual about it, so why not?

she says “aint nothin sexual bout lyin in a bed, the primary location where people usually have sex, with an almost nude man who is horny/erect 95% of the time he is around you, alone, in what i can only describe as a an ideal small town honeymoon suite while it is moodily raining outside” my sister in christ, do you recall lying (yes even to yourself) is a s i n

also i have never been catholic but hot damn i was also blushing and did think König is fucking s h a m e l e s s reading about him feeling up sis STILL IN HER HABIT 😂

He’s ever so grateful for his saving angel, who he gets to cuddle “as a reward”. You don’t quite know if it's a reward for you or him.

once again my sister in christ w h y n o t b o t h (also im deliriously pleased i can use sister in christ with multi-layered meanings here)

“Perhaps we’ll stay there... Forget all this,” he chatters lazily, clearly in the same sweet bubble as you. ive always found it so sweet and vulnerable and tender hearing bfs/guys muse and daydream about a future together 🥰🥰 just hits different when boys do it, and openly too

 the last of your armour, your pride and shame and vows, drift away like they were made of nothing but simple steam. 

But there’s nothing to hold on to but him, so you anchor yourself in the dark hunger of his eyes.

That’s all the reply you get: a pleased, filthy stare of someone who’s about to wreck you up.

“Come here,” he says while you’re already locked in an inseparable embrace.

*chefs kiss* these lines are perfection

You start to cry in full, not even knowing why. You just know you’ve wanted this for ages. This connection, this ecstasy, this mutual presence and fulfilment, this sense of belonging to someone. 

*nodding along sagely* yes cathartic cries are the best cries

your pussy wakes up after recovering from the initial shock… For some reason, it is vital for you not to let the old receptionist know that a humble sister of Christ is getting licked to ruin in his establishment. 

HAHAHA SALOME OMFG ABSOLUTELY SCREECHED READING THIS

You’re going through several stages of ego death and bliss; you’re going through a crisis of faith and multiple rebirths while König is having a field day with your pussy. Honestly completely normal reaction imho

All thoughts of What if he doesn’t enjoy it evaporate when you see the demanding erection between his legs, pointing at you so viciously that you feel pity for the fabric of his pants.

fics that have genital personification have a special place in my heart. also i did not expect to write such a sentence today or in my life but here i am, thank you tumblr

You’re not wearing any bra; you stopped wearing them years ago as useless and immoral. ok hold up one moment why are bras immoral lol girl unless you are small enough to join the free the nip movement without penalities a good support system is vital!!!

“You naughty girl…” he says thickly.

tbh in context of entire fic König calling sis a naughty girl is probably the hottest thing he’s said…sir where did u get all this rizz

“Want to see what I got?”

…forget what I said about the rizz, this is the fucking goofiest follow-up he could say 😂😂😂 salome has König vibes down pat

You’re mesmerized to see him already tensing from the chest up, the tendons on his neck becoming visible as he grits his teeth together. 🥰🥰🥰 an absolute vision

It's riddled with chants of Put it in and Forget about the bloody plastic because even with your zero experience you know it wouldn't feel as good as skin *me, reading, also joining in the chant*

The room must be smelling like a sex cave by now. protip: make sure the smell is gone if you have guests coming over

It makes you smile; him being so happy with simple things such as good food and some kinky sex, a nice cuddle and a nap to top it off. giggling at nunreader thinking humping is kinky UGH WHY ARE YOU SO SWEET AND ADORABLE i just want to take you on a shopping and makeup spree and introduce you to things like bubble tea, dry shampoo, glossier merch, weekend farmer's markets at union square, the hot barista/server at veselka's-

“This is what I call liking someone so much it hurts.” 🥺🥺🥺 couldnt seduce a woman if he tried my ass

König learns your body language; he knows it like a native speaker by the end of the week. EAT YOUR HEART OUT DUOLINGO (please dont kill me i'll fix my streak i promise)

König only smiles on the bed while you treat him; it’s like his master plan finally worked. I FUCKIN CALLED IT

“I would never hurt you….and no one ever will.” their whole conversation here is one of my favorite scenes in the whole story.

Without mentioning König or what you’ve been up to lately, you simply tell her you’ve decided to move on with your life. yes, i am one of those plebs who clap when the plane lands, but for dramatic turning points in fanfic

You receive lots of well wishes, hugs, even tears when you tell others you’re leaving. Embarrassed that you almost got rid of your robes and sneaked out to another secret lover’s meeting without even saying farewell, you meet everyone with full presence until you find yourself crying too. 

i love a fic that has lore and a bit of worldbuilding so well-built that you want to look around corners and peek into windows and doorways about what else there is - i found myself wondering about sister’s relationships here with the other nuns - but also loved that last phrase of reader finally feeling whole, “meeting everyone with full presence” after feeling so fractured and divided the first half of the story 👏👏👏we love a good full circle fic 👏👏👏

No wonder men die younger – you’d have to tie this specimen to a sturdy lamp post if you wanted him to stay put... i too think this everytime i see some dumb bullshit, mostly on @drunkpeopledoingthings

“Well, you’ve seen me,” you extend your hands to your sides, knowing you’ve already lost. “You can go back now.” there's something just very delicious watching someone fight a losing battle

desire pools, brims, until you feel like you can’t breathe anymore. loooooooove this phrasing

This must be one of the craziest things you’ve done in your life says reader, of having sex for the first time, a near universal experience

To you, he’s all men in one, the sheer mass of him making your thighs tremble from want. 🥰🥰🥰reader in love is so poetic <3

also yes squeaky beds are my kink, ty for including salome 🥰🥰🥰

also sis describing her pussy “hugging” dick has got to be the fluffiest smut ive ever read🥰🥰🥰

Ten times more powerful than the most blissful experiences with your God, you want to come here for worship again and again, to have his body entangled with yours. ah yes to know König is to know God indeed 😏😏😏😏😏

When done, he sinks half his weight on you, thoroughly spent, and you feel fulfilled, some deep-seated joy taking hold of everything that once was hollow. Curiously, all shame is absent. 🥹🥹🥹 i love this line so much. i hope everyone is able to experience this, especially if you like me have had some religious purity culture trauma in your life - there is no shame in love <3

The happiness, the pure joy in his eyes, is heartbreaking. At that moment, you know that all his silly jokes, follies, and babbles about taking you to the mountains and whisking you away have been real. They have been true, honest wishes... There is no lie in him, no jest, no fakeness. Just pure, simple joy from hearing that you finally chose him, too. 🥹🥹🥹

The old man doesn’t even care to look surprised when he sees you clothed in jeans and a simple shirt this time, smiling as you rush upstairs, hand in hand with König. okay but shoutout to this dude, you a real one for being the best unintentional wingman this side of europe

You can’t wait to sleep with him tonight: simply sleep with him, finally, curl up together in safety, do the most basic thing all lovers do. You can’t wait to wake up to a fresh dawn together, lovely, curious, and new. 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

You take new vows: promising to yourself to live each day fully and bravely, and never again shut your heart. 

The only thing left of you on your old bed is your black and white robe, and on it, a crucifix and a rose, and a note that says:

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love… But the greatest of these is love.

screaming crying i cant even explain how this fic made me feel, some mixture of joy and heartbreak and catharsis and healing all wrapped up in one as i found so many parallels both with reader and König at times and isn’t that just some of the best things about great stories, when it helps us see and feel and know and love ourselves and others in new ways we couldn’t before?

i wanted to do this absolutely lovely fic justice so ive literally been sprinkling comments on this during re-reads for months; i will close with a fitting - and catholic - quote that i love:

“There is a twilight zone in our hearts that we ourselves cannot see. Even when we know quite a lot about ourselves-our gifts and weaknesses, our ambitions and aspirations, our motives and our drives-large parts of ourselves remain in the shadow of consciousness. This is a very good thing. We will always remain partially hidden to ourselves. Other people, especially those who love us, can often see our twilight zones better than we ourselves can. The way we are seen and understood by others is different from the way we see and understand ourselves. We will never fully know the significance of our presence in the lives of our friends. That's a grace, a grace that calls us not only to humility, but to a deep trust in those who love us. It is the twilight zones of our hearts where true friendships are born.” - quote by Henri Nouwen, catholic priest

[astraea802]

Merlin "Rewatch" w/ Mom -- 5x10

("Rewatch" here meaning "Mostly first time watch, but with the knowledge of what happens.)

First of all: WHAT THE HECK WAS UP WITH THAT HORRIFIC FACE DISFIGUREMENT THING AT THE END?? I've never seen ANYONE discuss how messed up that is, and they SHOULD. I know this aired in the same time slot as Doctor Who, but Mom and I were NOT prepared.

Second of all: Uggghhhh

We're coming into the final three episodes.

Mom doesn't want to know what's coming, but knows it won't end well. She suspects Arthur's going to die (but we all know it's the execution that's the real kicker).

I will say, I was surprised Season 5 has actually had a lot of nice moments I never knew. It's a little moodier than I'd like, and Merlin as a character makes me sad, but there's still some nice comedy and character moments. Like Arthur saving that woman from being burned at the stake, that was so good! (Maybe it's easier for me to appreciate certain scenes knowing what's going to happen? I'm not as tense?)

(It also helps I sat out The Disir and The Dark Tower since I was walking the dog. I don't know I could have bore either without spoiling the finale out of pure frustration)

Mom's been just absorbing it all. She's had a lot of questions, like:

Mom: Why did Aithusa join Morgana? Me: We don't know. They never told us. 😒

Mom: (after The Dark Tower) How did Gwen turn evil? Me: Magic. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Mom: Oh, for gods sake! 🤦‍♀️

Mom: When do they find out about that bracelet Morgana gave Gwen to make her love Lancelot? Me: They don't. 😤 Mom: ...Are you kidding??

The deaths have been a little tougher this season, especially Elyan's. She liked the Dolma, but rolled her eyes a bit at Merlin trying to "act like a woman" instead of just getting on with curing Gwen. And she was NOT happy with Uther's ghost (who was??) or Gaius telling on Merlin and endangering Finna.

But god... watching Merlin's struggles, I just keep thinking, what was the point of it all?

There's so much back and forth the whole season, the whole series really, about destiny and duty and following your heart, and I just... what's the moral here? Follow destiny and get screwed? Follow your heart and still get screwed? It's good to know prophecies and Merlin just didn't know how to handle it? It's bad to know prophecies because you cause them to happen? If that was the case, why did Finna die to pass that last prophecy on? Also, you deserve to die, even when you haven't done anything wrong, because a prophecy says you will? You have choice? You never had one? Some will say the point is "the friends we made along the way", or there doesn't need to be a moral, but there's just no consistency, except whatever keeps the drama going.

It doesn't help that, except for the Camlann prophecy, we never actually hear any of the other prophecies everyone talks about. So we never know for sure if the problem was a misinterpretation of the prophecies in terms of what the Golden Age looked like, or if Merlin failed because of his choices, or if he was ALWAYS going to fail no matter what he did, or if he even failed at all! Because the dragon tells him he didn't in the end, but it doesn't make much sense.

Did the writers even know? They have admitted in interviews they were working nonstop on the show for five years, at grueling pace, so I forgive them for being fuzzy, but it seems like the show's moral code and prophecy lore really depended on who was writing the episode that week.

What I've always loved about Harry Potter is that while prophecies exist, the power of choice is emphasized. Prophecies can be, and often are, misinterpreted. Not every prophecy in the Department of Mysteries was ever fulfilled, so destiny is not the be-all end-all. It's made very clear that it's whether you act on prophecies or not that matters. The characters' beliefs and convictions still matter. It's consistent, it's clean, and it leaves the characters' agency.

In Merlin... you can interpret it a million different ways and still be wrong. And maybe part of the issue is that while Harry agrees to be the Chosen One since he already wanted Voldemort dead, Merlin's heart and destiny are so often divided. And that's what makes it so darn frustrating. And why I believe they gave Merlin too much of a burden for one person. No "almost" about it.

(We'll see if I revisit this after the finale)

[cloangi]

Get to know me 🔥

**Post may be updated every so often to change wording, to add/delete things, etc

--------------------

Part 1 of Bio - Information for starters⤵️

Fine to interact:

Under my age (15)

A bit over 18

A furry (not the gross kind though. Just the ones who dress up for fun)

Part of LGBTQ+

Overall everyone is welcome‼️

Do NOT interact (I seriously dont want any sort of conflict here):

Homophobic

Transphobic

Racist (if you're going out your way to harass people and be an overall bitch that is)

Phobia against any religion

Into sick activities (you already know what I mean by this 😐)

Against the military in any way (We get the whole propaganda stuff, but don't hate people who are active duty, in the reserves, etc. If someone wants to join, don't hate on them and spread death threats, its sad to see some people sre actually like this)

---

If I see any of yall tweaking out or being problematic over some shit, don't be surprised if I block your ass from here 💀🙏. I'm tryna keep this a "good vibe" type place. And keep in mind that I tolerate most types of behavior, and I literally never block people (very high and bold emphasis on "never").

So if I do happen to block you, you done messed up.

---

General things about me:

15 years old

I'm AROACE 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯

ENTJ personality type

Only do art as a hobby (so no money taking or commissions people)

Art consists of my fandom fixations

You can refer to me as either my username or the names Baaz and Keegan. Either one works, I don't care.

Extra: Besides posting low quality drawings of my fixations, I mostly reblog art or anything I can find of the fandoms/fixations I'm in (or know a bit about), such as art, memes, and such. Or you can find some random art that isn't related to any fandom reblogged on here.

(Adding onto the paragraph above): You can find a lot of my art (at least right now) in the "#cod ghosts" tag and the "#r6siege" tag. So if you wanna get a taste of my work you know where to do

I am fine with people + mutuals sending me DM's‼️ Just don't make it weird (you already know what I mean by that 💀)

Also, please do send me asks 🙏‼️. I enjoy responding to them and sadly never get any 😔

---

Note: You can make offensive + dark humor jokes (at least with me in the ask box or DM's) I'm into that shit. Can be racist jokes, sexist, sexual in some way, or whatever. Insulting me in any way doesn't affect me in the slighest as long as it's a joke. The more offensive the better—so go all out (not S/A though, that's something that even I'll never joke about).

---

Social stuff:

Quora Account - [Place where I've spent most of my time online, around 4-5 years or so. I post random things of me yapping of all topics or things I've found/seen].

--------------------

Part 2 of Bio - Fixations⤵️

The list below is color coded based on the fandoms I'm fixated on, or I just like

Orange = Fixated

Green = Like

Rainbow 6 Siege - Don't have the console to play the actual game so I watch it instead.

Call of Duty - Certain campaigns in it, mostly COD Ghosts though (Yes, I have played the OG versions of some of the campaigns on the old ps3 we have, and I do play MP Cod Ghosts).

Hell Divers 2 - Like R6S, I don't have the actual console itself to play it but it's on my wishlist and I really like the concept of the game, plus the community seems pretty fire.

Eddsworld - Used to have a HUGE fixation on this fandom, prob for up to 1-2 years (shit had a strong grip on me)

My Little Pony - I'm surprised this fandom is absolutely booming now. Watched the entire show (forgot everything though 💀), I love the art the fandom makes though, including the AU's.

Saiki K - Started to rewatch it again since I forgot the whole storyline 💀🙏

The Amazing Digital Circus - Caught up on all episodes

Demon Slayer - Watched all seasons

The Amazing World of Gumball - Havent really watched it much, but I really like it including the fan base

Into the Spiderverse - Have never read the comics, but movie-wise I like it

...Damn, you still reading? I mean if you're interested go ahead and drop a follow to this thing (you're likely gonna forget this account anyways, so free follow for me mwhahaha).

[emmatgc]

Wonderful World FanFic (Chapter 6)

(This is only for Seon Yul and Soo Hyun shippers, nothing more. This is my own interpretation . This is a sequel to their story. New characters were added. This will be a mini novel for most probably 10 parts. Enjoy and thank you for the few who are supporting this! This is for you who made a request ❤️)

Chapter 6: The Moon is Beautiful 

“He likes you” is on a loop on Soo Hyun’s mind a lot after that fateful night talking to her sister. Seon Yul on the other hand is feeling good. He likes seeing Soo Hyun happy or at ease. He is worried about Yoo Ra but he has always been a very private person and for him she is just a friend, nothing more. She wonders why Soo Hyun brought her up during their time together and it made him smile. Was she jealous? nah , it is impossible, he thought. 

 A lot has happened in 3 months. Soo Hyun managed to get a loan for her staff and the physicians even if those were really volunteers but with her connections, even though she rarely uses it, the orphanage is thriving under her care. It is an exclusive one but one open for an opportunity of a foster home and care if a family fit to be one will adopt a child. Their daily routine was to start their day at 8am, have breakfast at 7am and lunch at 11am and end by 5pm. It is a whole day of work and “Wonderful Smiles” just like Soo Hyun, is a work in progress and like their owner, a very good one. Soo Hyun is not always present everyday at the orphanage for her other duties as an author. She is thinking of coming back to teach in a university should her schedule allow.Seon Yul on the other hand, is present and available to the kids everyday not missing a day or an hour. The children adore him and the staff loves him. From time to time he would do conference calls and talk to his Chief Resident at the hospital. 

One day, he got a call from his best friend , Soo Jin.  “Hey, how is our prodigy doing there?. He replied, “I am just doing fine, thank you for asking”. “Any news to share with me, bro? “Ummm, Nothing that would entertain you, Soo Jin. “You always entertain me, Seon Yul”. They both laughed and shared some hospital stories while Seon Yul was gone and stories from the orphanage. Before their phone conversation ended, Soo jin told Seon Yul that Yoo Ra has been asking about him and Soo Hyun and it is exhausting to constantly reply to her that it is none of her business. “Our pretty friend might have a little crush on you, Seon Yul, better be careful” “You sound like it is a bad thing, Soo Jin”. “Well, love can make pretty girls crazy”. “I'll talk to her when I get back”. “Oh good, are you finally getting back? I was thinking you might live there and give up everything here for your lady love? “ What are you talking about? Seon Yul was puzzled but also smiling. “Seon yul, my man, you are a smart man, don’t go stupid on me now. You are there for her. You liked her, always has been. Your revenge is done and what's left? Love”.  That is impossible Soo Jin, he replied. “Is it really? Impossible? For you, two? I don’t think so but anyways, it's your life and again, I am telling you to be careful always but I also want you to be happy and I hope you are”. “Seon yul nodded and smiled, Soo Jin’s words comforted him and before they finally hung up the phone, he said “I am happy, truly”. 

Soo Hyun and Seon Yul are two people who share the same silence and experiences over the last 10 years. People are baffled why they are almost “in sync” with each other. Even the staff are surprised at how smoothly they work together and it seems that both know each other too well. There was a week when Soo Hyun got sick. Seon Yul, as the Doctor notices Soo Hyun coughing. Typical Soo Hyun just brushed it off as a normal cough until she fainted one afternoon. She had an allergic reaction to a food she had eaten in one of her book tour signing events and it is a good thing they already had a pharmacy in place inside the orphanage. Seon Yul got so worried and acted as her nurse during her recovery stage. Seon Yul realizes he doesn't want Soo Hyun getting hurt or in pain. Soo Hyun was treated at the orphanage for the 1st 2 days and her medical care continued at her house. Seon Yul wanted first hand to take good care of her. He monitored her day and night. 

Soo Hyun woke up late one night and she saw Seon Yul sleeping near her bed, his arm in her bed and his head down on it. She didn't want to wake him up but as soon as she wanted to move or attempt to go down her bed , she was surprised to hear “Don’t you dare get off your bed, Dr. Soo Hyun”. Jumping and acting a little scared, it is actually kinda dark in her room, she replied “I thought you were asleep, you scared me!” “Well, i wasn't really asleep, I was just pretending to be, besides, I know you are stubborn , stubborn enough to get off this bed and go back to work!” Seon Yul was being funny she thought but he aint smiling at all, he was serious. Soo Hyun, being the joker at times said “You sound so serious, it was just a minor thing”. 

“I don't want you getting hurt, alright? I need you to be ok, Soo Hyun”. Soo Hyun was shocked to hear him call her first name for the 1st time ever. I’m sorry, I hope it's ok to call you by your 1st name? Seon Yul was shy and nervous. “I am too old to be called by you by just my 1st name”, she replied. “I don’t care,” he replied almost instantly. Soo Hyun’s chest tightened a little bit. She got butterflies seeing how nervous Seon Yul is and hearing her name that way, is a pleasant but awkward surprise. “I am sorry for making you worry, Seon Yul. I am sorry you had to look after me. I am alright though, no need to check up on me all the time”, she reiterated to him. “Please, let me take care of you, Soo Hyun”. Soo Hyun bursted out laughing and said “are you taking care of your guardian?” He seriously replied, “You are not my guardian anymore remember” Seriously, you’ve got to take good care of yourself. You are not only allergic to some food but you are clearly exhausted. You need to rest and sleep more. I did some laboratory tests on you and it seems you haven’t gone for a regular check up for a year! Soo Hyun is smiling, is he mad at me? She asks herself. He seems so mad at the thought of her neglecting her health and so on and she can’t help it but think, this might be the feeling when somebody is worried about someone, or maybe if her son is old enough to care, if he was alive, and he will tell her this? Soo hyun and her thoughts were shut down when Seon Yul stood up and walked away from her a bit. Why is he acting this way?

“You are not listening to me”, he said. Soo Hyun is grateful , but she is confused as to why Seon Yul is acting so worried and weird at the same time. Seon Yul, Thank you, she replied. “I am listening but I guess I am also still on a high from the painkillers you gave me”. They both smiled. I will see you tomorrow. Sleep well. The next day, when Soo Hyun woke up, there were flowers in a vase. Her staff said it was from Seon Yul, that he picked it outdoors while he was jogging early in the morning. Seon yul gave her “Mugunghwa” also known as the rose of Sharon. 

Soo Hyun’s ex husband came to visit her after knowing at her Mom’s house that Soo Hyun is recovering at the orphanage. He brought flowers, too. He brought white lilies. It’s Soo Hyun’s favorites. Both chatted a lot and discussed some “work” related stuff and he opened up about her wanting to teach again. Seon Yul was told by the staff Soo hyun got a visitor and he wanted to check who. He entered her room and saw the two of them laughing at each other. Seon Yul was again, so serious checking up her blood pressure and her IV. He looked at him earnestly and he just smiled and greeted him. He thanked Seon Yul for taking care of his ex wife. “Thank you for taking good care of my ex wife, Dr. Seon Yul”. It is good she listens to you and stays treated here. She can be stubborn, you know. Seon Yul got a bit irritated hearing the words “ex wife” and answered, “I know” and excused himself. 

“Well, somebody’s jealous. Haha” Soo Hyun smacked Su Ho’s hand in return. “You dont have to say that!” He replied, “That you were my ex wife? It's the truth! Haha still laughing at Seon Yul and her. He is so obvious, my goodness, it is so obvious, you two! What is? Soo Hyun asked. “Come on Soo Hyun, the boy gave you “rose of sharon” flowers and I gave you lilies! So? She was confused. Oh my, you don't know what “mungunghwa” means? It is deep affection. Like eternal adoration and devotion or something. That kid is smart. He doesn't do things without thinking about it. Oh, don’t tell me “he just picked it out outside “ hahaha he didnt’ .

The guy was obviously jealous of me and that is why I mentioned you as my “ex wife”. Please leave now So hu, Soo hyun shouted at him embarrassed by what she heard from him. They laughed out loud and just felt warm to be having this conversation with her ex husband. Before So hun left, he told Soo Hyun “I will always have your back, Soo Hyun, you know that right? If he makes you happy, go for it. It's not gonna be easy but hey, nothing is. At least, he is a million times better looking than me” hahaha. So Hun left and again, a lot of feelings are intertwining in Soo Hyun’s thoughts. 

Seon Yul was indeed jealous and he knows it. He shouldn’t be, they are exes, of course he will visit her. His thoughts are running wild. He seems irritated that he didn't know her favorite flowers. He also seemed bothered that they were laughing and they hugged each other, too. Seon Yul has always been an introvert and one thing’s for sure, he has never been in love. So, he doesn't know just yet. He was reading a Japanese book to kill time until he came back to Soo Hyun’s room. He wanted to ask Soo Hyun to eat outside since she is now almost healed and recovered. He had it all planned out with the staff. Together with the flowers in the table, her favorite and allowed foods to eat, Soo Hyun was happy to be asked out since she was dreading staying for a couple days in a room confined and strictly monitored. Under that same moonlight there they were, both sitting and eating casually. He handed her a plate and got her food even if she insisted it was hers to get but Seon Yul won’t let her. They were music sort of and the trees, and the leaves were swaying like in the movies. It was a great ambiance, a romantic one. 

Seon Yul started the after dinner conversation. “ How are you feeling?” I am great, thank you. I have the best Doctor”, she replied. I’m sorry, he said. For what?, she replied. “For not knowing your favorite flowers”. Soo Hyun laughed loudly “hahaha, Oh God, don’t be! I don't even remember anymore. It has been a long time since” He then seriously replied “ But Soo Hu didn’t”. Of course, he was my husband. I would be angry if that detail was left out or erased, she honestly replied. They talked about the orphanage and they talked about her plans to go back to teaching. 

Seon Yul doesn't know what took over him but when Soo Hyun started talking about her plans and the way she smiles, he noticed her eyes lit up, her face blooming and her lips, so soft and all in 1 slow motion. All this pent up emotions for the last 6 years. He doesn't know if he hears everything she is saying, and in that moment he knows. This is the moment he is waiting for. With his heart beating so fast, and another lifeform taking over his body, with a thousand times of confidence and desire,  he held her hand softly and he said the words “The Moon is Beautiful”. 

The feeling of being so close yet so far. Suddenly, there was silence but there was music in the air. They stared for a while, until Soo Hyun finally opened her mouth and said “Are you in love with me?”

(The Moon is Beautiful means “I love you or I am in love with you" in many cultures especially in the Japanese culture. This is an inspiration I got from the Kdrama “Romance is A Bonus Book" which is one of my personal favorites of all time. Chapter 6 is coming up soonest. I am sorry something came up today but I hope I made you smile with this chapter 😘) 

[king-candybug-backup]

Hiiii! Wanted to join in on the Kill Switch appreciation blast, but I'm staying on anon cuz I'm shy ;w; ANYWAYS, I love the fic SOOOO much so far, and I completely agree with the person who said it feels like an ACTUAL sequel to the first movie *glares at RBTI* and I am so excited to see where you take it!

One thing that I think really helps with the whole "feels like a sequel" thing (aside from the AMAZING characterization of Vanny and Candybug) is the whole Sinistar plotline. Like, I could ABSOLUTELY see another scorned unplugged villain hearing about what happens when a Cy-bug eats you and then deciding to go for it to get stronger! It feels like a natural chain of events, and it's also a great way to have the characters teaming up out of necessity, even though they all kind of still hate each other lol

FASLGKASFDFAKSFDVASBKSJVA I AM RUNNING OUT OF WAYS TO SAY THANK YOU, BUT THANK YOUUUU 😭😭😭 I am absolutely blown away by everybody's kindness and enthusiasm like I 100% MEAN IT WHEN I SAY Y'ALL ARE JUST GIVING ME STRAIGHT-UP MOTIVATION JUICE HERE LMAO, THIS IS WILD TO ME

I'm also really pleasantly surprised that people seem to be digging the Sinistar thing! I was kind of worried it'd feel a bit too much like repeating old plotlines, but basically my hope was that the situation surrounding it all would feel different enough from how things went down in the movie, and I think it's kinda working? 😂 I don't know how to explain what I mean lmfao, BUT YAY, VERY GLAD PEOPLE LIKE IT, ANYHOW! :D (Please look at this Sinistarbug fan-art too like!!! It's so good!!!!!!!!)

Calhoun is going to start barricading the entrance to Hero's Duty every night at this rate, lmfao