#the whatever u want 😇😇😇😇😇
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sturnioloho · 6 months ago
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chris praise plus a hand kiss
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yuwuta · 6 months ago
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you ask yuuta if he wants a bite of your food and when he says yes you offer your plate to him, but he’s just sat there looking at you with his dumb big bambi boy eyes and his mouth slightly open and he will not look away or blink or close his mouth until you lift your fork to his lips to feed him and then he grins like shit’s sweet and hums about how good the food is like nothing happened like he’s not ridiculously attractive. gonna chew on steel
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rystiel · 21 days ago
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i feel like a fish swimming against the current in a river of angst enjoyers as someone who wants to make those characters happy for once
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muffingnf · 1 year ago
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george is so awesome he just likes hanging out with people and if the hang out happens to be in one of the most notorious haunted houses he’ll still be there
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kavehater · 3 months ago
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Most funniest thing ever btw is a person who likes alhaitham and kaveh and has alhaitham as his pfp and kaveh in his banner yet is a raging Zionist
#do you see what I mean now when I call hoyo fans dumbasses ? just the way they beg for rep but when u tell them sumeru is heavily influence#influenced by Islam btw and the characters would be Muslim just as mondstadt characters are Christian#they pull up the erm achually!!! but when it’s natlan it’s oh ! if you want to rep a culture you gotta do it right 🥺#disrespectfully Stfu and die ✋😞#dora daily#no and the way they say oh it’s fantasy they’re literally worshipping nahida oh wow ! I didn’t know that ! like a church is something not#alluding to Christianity but oh they worship venti#then it’s the natlan mauvika pyro archon is represented by a Māori person#awesome ! but you do realise it’s fiction and that the game has never and will never be a history book never has been since mondstadt and#never will be#yet you guys are so outwardly racist outwardly Islamophobic#the real issue is that you pick and choose the minority you worship#hoyo has issues but I’ve never seen a group of more horrible people than it is the hoyo fandom with their picking and choosing#and it’s always the yaoi fetishisers dumbass disrespectful haikaveh shippers appropriating everything cause cute ! two men kissing or#whatever the fuck. men period are disgusting I thought we established this#but go on you dumbass colonisers and colonise and appropriate everything too lmao imagine having an alhaitham pfp and being a Zionist go ky#- kys cause tumblr sucks and made me stop mid word 🤨#😇😇😇😇
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mimir97477906 · 1 year ago
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ive only ever played ts3 and ts4 before and since following you i got ts2 pilled. completely accidentslly. now i just let my laptop run all day with how much i play the game. thank you for the pilling
YAYYAYAAYYYYY YIPPEE LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO🎉🔥🎉🎉🔥🎉🔥🎉🔥🎉🔥🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🔥🎉🔥🎉🔥🎉🔥🎉🔥🎉🔥🎉🎉🔥🎉🔥🎉🔥🎉💯💯🙌💯🙌💯🔥💯🔥💯💯💯🙌💯🙌💯🙌💯🙌💯🎉💯🎉💯🎉💯💯🙌💯💯🔥
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butterscotch-brigade · 2 years ago
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yknow genshit fans can shittalk sonic all they want. at least we can all take solace in the knowledge that even sonics worst game has never given ppl gambling addictions 😌😌😌
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cryingforcrocodiles · 1 year ago
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White white white
di di di. hello. yes please. we can do the crime and then act we solved it for money or something. i'm 100% down to do crime with u!!!
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racew1nn3rs · 5 months ago
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─ 𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘦 𝘪𝘪. (𝘮𝘢𝘺𝘰𝘳 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘦) 🍊
⤷ summary: saudi arabian and australian grands prix happen! y/n starts making vlogs for the races and it reveals more about her and a certain driver's feelings than she hoped, not that she notices. poor oscar's stuck in the middle of it all but he's trying his best!
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liked by f1, landonorris, and 55,007 others
tagged landonorris and oscarpiastri
mclaren saudi arabia, you were beautiful even if the results weren't! ready for what's to come
12,567 comments
user1 admin not using a single nice photo of the drivers 😭
user2 admin be honest is this your revenge era
mclaren well, yes!
user3 HELP MEEEE
user4 the way lando looks at her 😭
user5 this is a place of business
user6 oscar looks petrified 💀
mclaren dw guys we're still training him!
oscarpiastri wtf why would u say it like that, i'm not a dog
mclaren full-time team mascot, part time driver
user7 admin drop the insta your so pretty 😭😭
user8 no literally, content of her WHERE
mclaren ynusername 🤲🏼
user9 LETS FUCKING GO
user10 HER DISSING HER OWN TEAM 💀 THEY'RE GONNA FIRE YOU GIRL
mclaren they don't pay me to LIE
user11 CRAZYY
user12 LANDO IS NEVER GETTING A GOOD PIC EVER AGAIN 😭
mclaren what can i say, i am no mans peace 🥱
user13 icon
landonorris reporting you to hr
mclaren for what
landonorris idk harrassment or something
mclaren ok keyboard warrior, lets calm down 💀
user14 KEYBOARD WARRIOR HELEPSJSM
user15 i vote admin just takes over and we don't even get driver pictures
user16 real and true
user17 i fear we may have lost the plot
user18 thoughts on today's results
mclaren i'm trying to be positive in general but man
user19 LMAOOOOO
user20 ik the pr department is shaking in their boots after every post notif
mclaren probably! but unfortunately for everyone, i am going to keep doing whatever i want
user21 no more lando beef, mclaren admin?
mclaren i forget but i never forgive. i forgot why we were fighting but i stay hating bitches 🥱
landonorris literally WHAT DID I DO
mclaren IDK BUT IK U PISSED ME OFF 🫵
oscarpiastri diabolical photo choice
oscarpiastri i look like a little kid on picture day
mclaren so basically your everyday look
oscarpiastri yk what you are making this work environment very hostile
mclaren i can make it more hostile if you want 🤨
oscarpiastri nevermind!!!
maxfewtrell most flattering lando picture i've seen in years
mclaren that's saying something isn't it 🤩
user22 i went to haterville and they all knew you admin
mclaren they actually just elected me mayor there!!! 💪🏻
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liked by bsfusername, landonorris, and 17,800 others
ynusername if my admin duties don't kill me, i promise my caffeine addiction will! (:
3,422 comments
user23 be honest, how many coffees have you had today
ynusername 3!
user24 oh that's not that bad
ynusername +5
user24 JESUS CHRSUT
bsfusername at this point i think meth would be healthier
ynusername honestly yeah
ynusername thanks for the suggestion!!
user25 nooo admin don't do meth ur so sexy aha
ynusername that just made me want to do meth more
landonorris so what i'm hearing is buying you an espresso machine would get me in your good graces 😇
user26 oh brother here he goes
ynusername you must be deaf then
landonorris 😔 2 espresso machines?
ynusername i don't want ur dirty espresso machines 🙄
oscarpiastri now what car is that 🫵
ynusername SHHHHH
oscarpiastri TRAITOR
bsf2username when your not busy being super sexy on a race track, can we go thrifting and get sweetgreen and overpriced coffee 🙏🏼🙏🏼
ynusername this could've been an email, get this out of my comments 💀
ynusername but yeah obviously
user27 admin vlogs when 😔
ynusername SOON!!! very very soon
user28 mother feeding us once again
ynusername brb, adding single mom who works two jobs, loves her kids, and never stops to my resume
danielricciardo coffee recipe where?
ynusername in your dms now ‼️
danielricciardo is this flirting
ynusername no if i was flirting i would've told you to ask me in person, i'm just being charitable
landonorris can i get the coffee recipe too then 🤲🏼
ynusername wdy want next, my mugs? keep on walking charity case
user29 CHARITY CASE IS CRAZYDFHAJ
user30 she's so effortlessly funny and mean i love her
user31 i feel like this is so unprofessional /:
ynusername babe professional where, you are on??? my personal?? account???
user32 maybe she's born with it, maybe it's the fact that she's consumed enough caffeine to tranquelize a horse
user33 oh please the horse would be dead
ynusername call an ambulance, BUT NOT FOR ME ‼️💪🏻���️
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ynusername posted to story!
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(caption: melbourne vlog out now on youtube, go watch!!)
15,221 replies
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"This thing better be working," could be heard slightly muffled in between vague shuffling sounds. After a second or two of incoherent noise, the camera footage finally came on. Y/N smiled at herself in the camera as the recording light blinked to life, and raised her hand victoriously. She grabbed the smile microphone in front of her and laughed, "It looks like everything is working. Thank God, I wouldn't have known how to fix it otherwise."
"Alright everybody, welcome to the first race weekend vlog hosted by me! Your favorite McLaren admin and social manager. It took me forever to figure out how I wanted to go about this, but now I think I settled on a format that will work," She explained as she walked around the small, clean kitchen that was within frame of the camera. She pulled a glass jar out of her cabinets and left it on the counter before pulling a jug of cold brew and a cartridge of milk out of her fridge.
"It is currently 7:30 A.M on March 29th, and I have a flight to Melbourne in 3 hours. I'm already packed and ready for this weekend, but I wanted to get an introduction filmed and I wanted to take a shower before I left." Y/N paused for a moment as she poured the coffee into her mason jar until she seemed satisfied and began to add some milk. "I am totally exhausted so this is probably cup one of like," she laughed, "I don't know seven probably. And this is a pretty big jar I won't lie."
"The race weekend doesn't technically start until Friday, so I'll be getting there a bit early, but I wanted to film some content before the race weekend gets really hectic, so McLaren is sending me a little bit earlier. I'm excited though! I love the heat, even if I live in London the antithesis of Australian weather," she taste-tested her coffee and hummed in delight.
"God I really never miss with this stuff," she said contently. "Anyway, it's a bit of an early start today, but I'll have plenty of time to sleep on the fight. I mean can you believe that London to Melbourne is a nearly 22 hours," she scoffed. "I vote that we start making all of the races in one place so I don't have to feel jet lag more painful than the force of 1,000 suns every other weekend. Not that I'm complaining," she chuckled awkwardly, "I love my job McLaren please don't fire me."
Abruptly an orange tabby cat came into the frame of the camera, causing Y/N to abruptly grab her glass jar in the hopes of avoiding a mess. She gasped, but laughed as the cat scampered off as quickly as it had come. She shook her head fondly.
"That, ladies and gentleman, was Cali! My cat. She's literally my baby, and I love her more than anything else on this earth. However, she does have an affinity for hitting things off of counters and breaking them. She also hates men and nearly all other animals, so she's basically the world's biggest hazard to society. She's a good girl, I love her." Y/N explained between sips of coffee as she stared wistfully past the the frame of the camera, where it could be assumed Cali had gone.
Abruptly an alarm went off and Y/N threw her head back with a groan.
"That means I have to get in the shower and get ready so I can leave on time," she said, before taking a few more sips of coffee. "I'm going to go do that, and the next time you'll hear my beautiful voice will be at the Melbourne Airport! Cue the travel montage!"
An assortment of clips follow. Y/N is seen dragging her luggage through Heathrow Airport. Y/N is seen ordering another coffee at the airport, finishing the coffee, and ordering another before her flight. Y/N is seen responding to emails from her airplane seat, editing video footage, and responding to instragram and twitter comments. Footage is shown outside the plane window of a cloudy, blue sky and a time lapse is shown as the sky grows beautiful shades of pink and red before becoming a starry-night sky. Y/N is seen cozy in a throw blanket and a travel pillow, presumably asleep with headphones on. Y/N is shown pulling her luggage through the airport once again, with a brand new coffee cup in hand. She smiles, taking a sip before she is seen settled down in a seat in the bustling airport.
"Twenty-two or so hours later and I have finally landed in Melbourne. I'm waiting for my Uber to get here so I can finally be taken to my hotel to drop my stuff off. I have a meeting with the McLaren drivers in two hours, but luckily I slept really well on the plane. I don't know how else I would be able to deal with Lando Norris. I'm going to finish this coffee in order to maximize my tolerance for the next few hours, but I suspect I'll be getting a new coffee before I reach that meeting. My addiction truly knows no bounds," she laughs, trying to ignore the people vaguely shown within frame that are staring at her speaking to a camera.
The camera cuts abruptly and the waiting screen from SpongeBob flashes on the screen, including the narrator's voice reading "2 hours later."
Y/N is shown once again in new clothes, a new coffee cup in hand, and luggage replaced by a small canvas bag. Her comfortable plane clothes have been swapped out for jean shorts and a plain white tank-top. Her hair is clipped back out of her face, and she is adorned with simple gold jewelry and light makeup.
Y/N smiles at the camera as she walks, bustling and talking heard around her, before whispering into the small microphone, "I have arrived at the McLaren garage. It is now time to meet with Lord Lando and workplace mascot Oscar Piastri," the titles slip off her tongue sarcastically and she doesn't bother suppressing an eye-roll.
In the next clip, Oscar and Lando are seen seated on either side of her as they sit in what seems like a board-room. Lando leans over and whispers something that the camera doesn't pick up and Oscar laughs while Y/N grimaces and reaches forward to readjust the camera. When the camera comes back on, Lando and Oscar are seated together on the left of Y/N as she faces on angle toward both them and the camera.
"Don't just sit there and look pretty, say hello to the camera boys," Y/N says and Oscar cackles at the disgruntled look on Lando's face.
"Is that your way of calling me pretty Y/N," Lando chokes out between laughs, and Y/N scoffs with an eye-roll.
"I was actually talking about Oscar, but whatever floats your little papaya boat Norris," Y/N deadpans and Oscar doubles over from the force of his laughter at the pout on Lando's face.
"That's not nice at all, I hope you know that. I think I am sitting here very prettily, thank you very much," Lando says, leaning into the girl next to him to speak into her microphone.
Y/N draws the microphone back, swatting him away, "Yes, yes quite prettily," Y/N mocks in a British accent.
Oscar, still trying to recover, joins in, "Pretty little Lando Norris," and Y/N laughs jovially, reaching across Lando as if the boy weren't there to high-five the Austrialian driver.
"Bullies, the lot of you," Lando mumbles and Y/N brushes off his comment without response before finally facing the camera.
"Anyway, welcome to the first McLaren race weekend vlog. I'm Y/N L/N, the best media manager in the whole god damn world, and this is Lando Norris, the biggest pain in my ass, and Oscar Piastri, the second biggest pain in my ass. How are you feeling about Melbourne boys?" Y/N questions, transitioning smoothly much to the British driver's chagrin.
"Feeling proud to be the second biggest pain in the ass and not the first. Probably the only time i've been glad to get second actually," Oscar comments and Y/N laughs as Lando shakes his head in disappointment.
"But in all seriousness it is good to be home, this is easily my favorite race of the year seeing as it's my home race and i'm looking forward to, hopefully, good results from our team," Oscar supplies and Y/N nods along to his words.
"Yes, Australia, we are in you and we are happy about it," both boys choked out a laugh at the manager's sexual innuendo and Oscar quickly covered his mouth with his hand so as not to react too much. "What about you Lando what are you feeling," Y/N questioned, leaning the small microphone to the boy.
"Feeling like that was a stupid joke. And also like I am going to be getting P1 this weekend. I can feel it in my bones."
"Leave my jokes alone Lando, you're not being paid to be a critic," she scoffed, "and if I recall, you said the same thing in Saudi Arabia not that long ago. What's changed now?"
Lando rolled his eyes, "What's changed is that we're in Australia now and I'm feeling much more confident."
"Well thank god for that," Y/N supplied unhelpfully as Oscar laughed.
"Now, what we really came here for, it's time to film a video for this channel, it's going to be a fan Q and A, I picked the questions. By the time this vlog is up, the QnA should've already been posted. So feel free to stop watching this and to go watch that or whatever," Y/N commented. "After that we're going to film a TikTok challenge," both and Lando and Oscar grimaced, but Y/N ignored their dismay at the idea of fiming yet another TikTok, so cue the montage! Filming time!" Y/N exclaimed and the screen transitioned to a new series of clips.
In the first clip Oscar and Lando were sitting in two chairs while Y/N sat across from them with a set of notecards.
"Lando, this question from user "ln4mania" asks, "Are you and admin actually friends? Or is the online beef real? The people demand answers!" Y/N reads off with a laugh.
"Do you hear that, the people demand answers Lando! Don't keep them waiting!" Oscar and Y/N laugh as Lando shakes his head and tucks his face into his hands.
"There is no beef, guys. Me and admin, or rather me and Y/N are just fine. We hadn't even actually met when that happened," Lando supplied between laughs. Y/N looked at the camera and rolled her eyes with a shake of her head, faux-disagreeing with the boy.
She ignored the simmering pit of disappointment in her stomach. She did in fact have a problem with entitled little Lando Norris who still gave her side-eyed looks and judgmental stares whenever he saw her. If that wasn't humiliating enough, Oscar had clearly noticed it too, which just gave Y/N the feeling that she wasn't being taken seriously at all now that Oscar understood Lando's lack of respect for Y/N. However that didn't matter in the current moment. All that mattered was making this video.
The next clip showed Lando and Oscar sitting at a table with bowls of water in front of them and towels strewn across a chair just within frame of the camera. Y/N stood behind them, hands rested in their hair as she reacted to the prompts being read by someone, an unnamed media intern, off-camera.
"Who is harder to make videos with?" The intern asked and Y/N huffed out a laugh as she let her hands fully grasp Lando's curls and push him into the water quickly. He sputtered, trying to blink the water out of his eyes as Y/N laughed at the wet-puppy dog look he was sporting.
Y/N tried to shake the ridiculous desire to let her hands run through the soft curls underneath her finger tips. Curse Lando and whatever stupidly good, rich-person hair routine he used that made him smell good and look good, and... whatever.
Lando, blinking water out of his eyes, was now undoubtedly certain that being damn-near waterboarded was worth it if it meant that Y/N would laugh like that again. He knew Oscar would harass him again later for being "down-bad" or something along those lines- as he had done every time he caught the man staring-, but as he caught a glimpse of Y/N's bright smile and shaking shoulders, he found he didn't really care.
The next clip showed Oscar, Lando, Y/N, and a laughing media intern as they all dried off- somehow all having become wet through the course of filming. Y/N dried herself off quickly, taking a sip of her newly refilled coffee, not seeing the way that only the camera and Oscar saw Lando stared at her until the driver was nudged back into focus on drying himself off.
A title-card once again came on the screen with white words on a photo collage of Australian grand-prix candids that Y/N had taken, reading "Race montage? More likely than you'd think."
Footage was shown of the free practice sessions. Oscar and Lando getting in and out of their cars. Engineers along the pit wall going over data. The team speaking incoherently, going over the game plan for Sunday's race. Oscar and Lando greeting fans, signing merch, and posing for photos. Y/N smiling and waving at a cheering crowd of people before staring at the camera incredulously with a small caption reading: "Omg she's famous your honor". More clips showed Lando laughing as Oscar tossed grapes and Lando moved to catch them with his mouth. Lando nearly choking as Y/N cackled in the background. Multiple clips showing Y/N with a fresh coffee, and another... and another, as Oscar's face in the background grew with concern. Zak Brown explaining to Y/N the dangers of caffeine overdose, and the need for moderation. Y/N explaining to Zak Brown that without coffee she would simply collapse and die, which the camera showed did nothing to ease her concern. Y/N getting caps signed by the drivers for fans and walking away with intricate friendship bracelets decorating her wrists.
And finally footage of the race. The engineers in the garage. The pit-crew changing tires. The cars racing past as Y/N watched attentively. Footage of the crowd as they cheered when the cars whizzed past. Smiling faces of fans. Y/N's cheers as Oscar and Lando passed. The smiling faces of McLaren employees as Lando and Oscar crossed the checkered flag in P6 and P8 respectively.
Y/N accepting hugs from both drivers, ignoring the burning sensation in her stomach as Lando wrapped his arms around her with a smile and a laugh. Y/N calling Lando smelly and telling him to go wash off if he wants to hug her next time, and him rolling his eyes at her fondly before making a face at the camera. The podium celebration is shown and Y/N smiles as the anthem plays, even though it's not for her own team.
The final clip is shown of Y/N in her hotel room, comfortable in sweats as she sits on the unmade bed.
"Not bad results this week guys! P6 for Lando and P8 for Oscar, which are good points for the team. I'm happy on my end, I think we got some good content filmed, and I am now ready to go to sleep so I can get home to Cali and my own bed quicker. I hope you enjoyed this video, and if you didn't don't tell me because I don't care!" Y/N jokes with a smile.
"Hopefully I will see you all at the next race, if not the race after that! Bye papaya fans, and be sure to follow us on instagram and all of the other social platforms!" Y/N exclaimed, gesturing to the list of the social media handles that appeared on her right hand side.
And with that, the camera cut to black.
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liked by oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1, and 29,145 others
ynusername afraid to report that i fought jetlag and lost 😔 i did sleep for 25 hours straight after melbourne and i had no clue where i was when i woke up! shout out cali for waking me up 🙏🏼 best friend frl
9,547 comments
bsfusername i'm going to try not to be offended by that caption (love you bb cali) but FUCK YOU CAUSE I BOUGHT YOUR ASS BREAKFAST
ynusername my bad! s/o to that bomb ass omlette 🤩
bsfusername never doing shit for you again
user34 that vlog was god tier, how long did that take
ynusername it took 7 hours of editing and years off my life, thanks so much for asking 🥳
maxverstappen1 thanks again for those podium photos! you have a gift for photography 💪🏻
ynusername don't mention it! 👍🏼
ynusername (no seriously, mclaren might behead me)
mclaren beheading is so last year. firing squad. 🗣️
user35 not y/n threatening herself 💀
oscarpiastri suprised your body didn't naturally wake up for coffee
ynusername it did! just 25 hours later
user36 your poor cat was literally starving for a whole day? youre a horrible owner
ynusername let me introduce you to god's greatest creation: the automatic feeder!!! i'm sure they can mail one to whatever fucking rock you live under!
user37 PERIODDDD
user38 me personally? i'd never log on again
user39 she needs a personal channel 🙏🏼🙏🏼 i'd subscribe
user40 her cat is so cute 😭😭😭 gimme that
ynusername 🫵 STAY BACK HEATHEN, NO ONE TOUCHES CALI AND LIVES
user40 my bad fam 🧍🏻‍♀️
user41 i want someone to love me as much as she loves that mean ass cat
landonorris don't you have a job to be doing 💀💀 she slept through a full work day
user42 lando always on her ass and for whattttt
user43 obsessed obsessed obsessed
ynusername i had the day off! but not the guy who was streaming video games coming for me 🥱 talking bout get a job
user44 lando and y/n beefing on insta again? we're so back
user45 at this point instagram comment beef isn't enough, they need to duel or some shit
user46 the caffeine addiction almost got her guys
ynusername i wish it would, then i wouldn't have to work with lando's annoying ass
landonorris I CAN SEE YOUR COMMENTS???
ynusername THAT'S THE POINT
user47 honestly just give her a gun atp, these men test her too damn much
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user48 NURSE 🫵 SHE'S RIGHT HERE
user49 no fr, like let's get back to bed grandma
user50 OP, are you concussed?
user51 no actually cause didn't y/n just say she wanted to khs working with him 💀💀
pastryboy81 that sign can't stop me, because i can't read!
user53 OK I ACTUALLY SEE THE VISION
user54 ARE YOUR EYES CLOSED???!1!1
user55 i fear i totally get it 😔
user56 it's giving enemies to lovers, secret relationship type vibe lowkkkk
user57 no deadass like he hugged her reallll tight
user58 she also hugged oscar 😭😭?? and he has a whole gf
user59 the way she shoved him off and told him he reeked not 5 seconds after 💀 delusion is a disease yall
user60 someone call the f1 gossip pages cause 😗
user61 more like someone call the ward cause somethings real off with yall 🤨
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sorry that this update took forever, i had surgery and recovery has been rougher than i expected! hope you enjoy!!
please leave your thoughts in the comments and feel free to drop a request for your fav in my asks <3
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𝙩𝙖𝙜 𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩
@lemon-lav @slutforpopculture @m4rt10ne @urfavsgf @sadsierra2 @96jnie @sltwins @poppyflower-22 @alliumiae @livelovesports @liberty-barnes @the-holy-trinity-l @iliwyss @awritingtree @redpool @elliotts1one @velentine @chaoticmessneutralplease @5sospenguinqueen @charizznorizz @2pagenumb @mxdi0 @cwiphswmwasohmm @tremendousstarlighttragedy @lnspipedrm @itseightbeats @tinycoffeeroom @woozarts @personwhoisther @a-beaverhausen @love-simon @annabellelee @ravisinghs-wife @chezmardybum @greantii @weekendlusting @monserelates @sapphiccloud @halleest @deamus-liv @gigigreens @morenofilm @laneyspaulding19 @lanireadss @dear-fifi @moldyshorts1997 @oliviarodrigostan13 @eugene-emt-roe @ilivbullyingjeongin @im-a-ghost666
2K notes · View notes
lewisvinga · 6 months ago
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down bad | lewis hamilton x fem! reader
summary; just lewis being an absolute simp for his wife on the main
fc; stenss on ig
warnings; ?
taglist; @namgification @louvrepool @locelscs @thehufflepuffavenger1 @minseok-smaus @goldenmclaren @ollieshifts @lavisenri @graciewrote @xoscar03 @c-losur3
note; requested ! lewis the loml
masterlist !
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liked by lewishamilton, carmenmmundt, and others !
yourusername: when bae calls me a star girl
lewishamilton: oh my 😍😍😍😍😍
lewishamilton: absolutely love this look and i love you
yourusername: love youuuuuu🫶
lewishamilton: just the prettiest girl ever 🥰
yourusername: 🥹👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨
username: me n the bad bitch i pulled by being a simp
username: SIMP LEWIS!
username: lewis is so me😭
username: TUTORIAL PLS QUEEN🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️
yourusername: this friday 😇
username: pink blush girlies rise !!
username: this is how my makeup turns out in my head but not irl
carmenmmundt: gorgeous gorgeous !!!
yourusername: thank uuu carm 🤍🤍
username: this is my mother
⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆
lewishamilton uploaded to their story !
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[caption 1; the wife demanded matcha today] [caption 2; 😍😍😍😍]
yourusername i didn’t demand i politely asked 🙎‍♀️🙎‍♀️
lewishamilton ‘lew let’s go get matcha now if you say no i’m divorcing you😛’
yourusername ‘TWAS A JOKE😒
yourusername tysm for my iced oat milk matcha latte husband 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨
lewishamilton whatever wifey wants wifey gets🙄👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨
yourusername happy wife happy life am i right 😁
yourusername speaking of let’s go shopping
lewishamilton knew you’d want that, don’t worry, i made an appointment at hermes 😁
yourusername u know how to make a girl happy lewis hamilton 😖😖
username GIVE ME UR GAME CARD
username Y/NNNNN
username ask her where she got the tights plz
lewishamilton tezenis:)
username OMG???
username her fits are always on point omg
⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆
yourusername uploaded to their story !
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[caption 1; the husband picking out a pink shopping outfit, is this a sign for what i think it is?] [caption 2; all good things come in orange boxes right?😁 thank you so much, my luv lewishamilton 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨🩷]
lewishamilton if the wife says she wants a birkin 25 in sakura then a birkin 25 in sakura is what she’ll get 😁😁
yourusername I KNEW THERE WAS A REASON YOU WANTED ME TO WEAR PINK!!!😩
yourusername crying ilysm i already have so many outfits planned 🥹
lewishamilton and i can’t wait to see what your amazing mind comes up with 🤍
username why am i shocked abt a birkin like that man isn’t a millionaire
username i need my own lewis hamilton 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️
yourbestfriend GIRLK IM SCREAMING FOR YOUU😫😍
yourbestfriend THATS BEEN ON UR WISHLIST FOR AGES
yourusername I KNOWW😩
yourusername it helps when ur man is the lewis hamilton n an absolute simp😋
yourbestfriend does he have friends 🤨🤨🤨
yourusername no why does he need friends when he has me 🙄( HIS WIFE )
yourusername jk yes🤓
yourbestfriend we all know lewis would only hang out w u if given the chance 😭
yourusername husband tingz 😇😇
username lewis is so husband material im crying
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liked by lewishamilton, yourbestfriend, and others !
yourusername: get yourself a man who hates driving so much but refuses to let you drive.
tagged; lewishamilton
username: here before simp lewis
lewishamilton: can’t ever get over your beauty, my love 😍😍
yourusername: skdkslkd stop making blush
lewishamilton: your only worry is to just sit there and look pretty, not driving
yourusername: GET URSELF A MAN LIKE THIS LADIES🥰👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨
username: IM TRYINGGGG
username: y/n won the jackpot fr
username: OKAY BUT HER FIT??😫
username: mommy? sorry, mommy? sorry 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️
username: outfit ateeeee
username: y/n and lewis are such fashionable couples i love them 😫😫
yourbestfriend: where u find him fr
yourusername: turns out pretending to be lost in monaco works but if you actually end up lost:/
yourbestfriend: BET
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liked by yourusername, alexandrasaintmleux, and others !
lewishamilton: happiest of birthdays to my sweetest girl. forever grateful that i get to call the most gorgeous woman on this earth my wife. may this day be filled with many blessings. i love you so much, pretty girl. 🤍
tagged; yourusername
yourusername: YOU ARE MY BLESSING🥹🥹
yourusername: i love u sm , lew ☹️🩷
lewishamilton: love you , pretty girl 🩷
username: i’m so sick rn
username: sleeping on the highway tonight 🚶‍♀️
username: idk how many ‘me n who’ i got left in me😭😭
username: MOTHERS BDAY!!🎉���
username: screaming crying throwing up
username: SHES SO FAIRYYY
alexandrasaintmleux: happy birthday 🌸 so excited to be in the ferrari garage with you next year🤍
yourusername: thank u alexxx🥹🥹 so excited too🫶
charles_leclerc: it means ditch the pink for red 😇
lewishamilton: hey, my wife can do whatever she wants 🙄
charles_leclerc: i’ll get roscoe and leo matching outfits 😇
yourusername: DEAL!
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liked by lewishamilton, yourbestfriend, and others.
yourusername: advice of the day; marry a man who is down bad for you
tagged; lewishamilton
lewishamilton: that makeup look of yours 😍😍🥰🥰
yourusername: i think u liked it bc we went shopping after but i’m not sure tho 😋
lewishamilton: how can i not be so down bad for you? my own wife?? a living and breathing goddess???
yourusername: LEWWWKSNDSKKD
yourusername: says the walking god😩 i won’t say much bc there are children here
landonorris: tysm for saving me
username: i will never get over them
username: my roman empire is y/n and lewis 🥹
username: thank u y/n for lewis content 🫡🫡
username: lewis js like me fr bc if i was married to y/n, i’d so be down bad for her too😩
username: him carrying the hermes, chanel, and cartier bags, IM SICK😖😖😖😖
username: not her winning the lottery omfs
yourbestfriend: does he have spare $$$?
yourusername: yes we found a bday gift for u from chanel pookie don’t worry👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩
yourbestfriend: THANK U MR N MRS HAMILTON😭😭🙏🙏🙏🫶
lewishamilton: 🫡🫡🫡
username: he’s so down bad he buys y/n’s best friend chanel, why can’t my friends work harder fr 😒😒
2K notes · View notes
rbdbrainworms · 2 years ago
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a cara de pau da gata
1 note · View note
kuromi-hoemie · 8 months ago
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i got to see my manager for a bit though
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the hot masc enby i always want to see at work isn't here today, fuck my entire life why am i even here
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jk im here for other reasons but i always love seeing them (⁠〒⁠﹏⁠〒⁠) we always look each other up n down like oh 😳 heyy
21 notes · View notes
maplesyrupsainz · 27 days ago
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˖⁺。˚⋆˙baby fever | GR63˖⁺。˚⋆˙
pairing: george russell x wolff!reader y/n (she/her)
genre: social media au
warnings: jus insanely fluffy, some sexual innuendo
summary: in which your boyfriend becoming an uncle sends your hormones into overdrive
a/n: idk who the baby is irl btw HAHAH jus guessing & im too lazy to find out doing whatever i want for the plot sooo jus allow it
request!!!: could i request something with george russell dating wolff!reader? anything cute and fluffy tbh
my masterlist
fc: various brunette girls on pinterest
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instagram ->
ynwolff
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liked by georgerussell63, lilymhe, and others
ynwolff what i've been up to
view all comments
user1 "i have a crush on him" LOL same girl same
user2 omg yay a y/n post who cheered
user3 so aesthetic
lilymhe miss you!
liked by ynwolff
user4 y/n being a simp for george is jus so real
user5 hahah i bet toto loves it
user6 do u think she made that 5th pic
user7 oh 100% she did
user8 biggest gr63 simp on planet earth
susie_wolff the first picture is blurry, y/n
ynwolff i know lol
susie_wolff oh interesting choice
ynwolff 🤨
user9 LOL
georgerussell63 i have an even bigger crush on you x
ynwolff riiiight 🤨
twitter ->
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messages ->
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instagram ->
georgerussell63
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liked by ynwolff, lewishamilton, and others
georgerussell63 ☀️
view all comments
user15 y/n is gonna love this
user16 this is so romantic
user17 vacation george >>>>>>
user18 dog, gf, baby? he's somehow got it all
susie_wolff such lovely pictures
georgerussell63 only because y/n is in them!
user19 number 1 y/n simp goes to.....
user20 me tbh
ynwolff delete this. a lot of people are crying
georgerussell63 you okay?
ynwolff no you know how i feel about this
user21 LOLLL
user22 "i need him to impregnate me stat"
ynwolff dont remind me of this
georgerussell63 😂 no comment
user23 oh y/n how we love you
user24 y/n best & most realest wag ever
user25 y/n is so lucky
messages ->
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twitter ->
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messages ->
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instagram ->
ynwolff
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liked by susie_wolff, yourbff, and others
ynwolff daddy
view all comments
user30 hahahahahahahahahahahaha
user31 the caption 😭
user32 she's so real oh my god
user33 hope toto doesn't know about all this 😂
liked by susie_wolff, georgerussell63
user34 HAHA Y/N STOP
user35 "daddy" 😭 what hahahaha
georgerussell63 behave
ynwolff 😇
yourbff Y/N
ynwolf 🥹
yourbff ur gonna get in trouble
susie_wolff i wont be showing your dad this
ynwolff i have no regrets
alex_albon the media training is working then?
ynwolff for sure!
user36 LOLLL alex
messages ->
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twitter ->
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instagram ->
georgerussell63
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liked by ynwolff, lilymhe, and others
georgerussell63 dont worry everyone she's alive and told me to tell you that she meant what she said ....
view all comments
user38 oh thank god
user39 our girl is back
user40 one of us always
alex_albon george all of your posts are just y/n fan pages
ynwolff as it should be tbh
georgerussell63 yea & what about it
lilymhe you should give it a go alex
user41 LOLLLLLL
user42 the selfie w toto hahahahaha
user43 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
landonorris has y/n ever considered a private account?
georgerussell63 now where's the fun in that?
ynwolff wait why does he have a point
user44 LOL
user45 nooo y/n
ynwolff SHUSHHHHH
ynwolff my dad hates you
ynwolff i dont though
THE END 🩵
1K notes · View notes
moonstruckme · 4 months ago
Note
absolutely live for ur roommate!james could you maybe write one on him meeting some of readers friends for the first time or calling james to pick u up after a girls night 😇would love to see him finally feel “included” in our life like we are in his
Thank you for requesting lovely!
cw: alcohol
part 1 | part 2 | part 3 │ part 4 │part 5 │ part 6 │ part 7 │ part 8 │ part 9 │ part 10 │ part 11 │part 12 │ part 13
roommate!James x shy!reader ♡ 1k words
James is so absorbed in the football match on his phone that when there’s a tap on the window next to his face, he jolts halfway across the center console and squeaks like he’s twelve years old again. 
You’re beaming outside the car. Your shoulders shake with quiet, un-self-conscious laughter, so it’s impossible for James to be any kind of upset. Still, he makes a show of huffing a little as his own smile spreads. He reaches over and opens his door. 
“Sorry,” you say. You don’t look it, so he lets you off the hook for your over-apologizing. 
“Who do you think would drive you home if I had a heart attack?” James asks. He’s somewhat breathless, either because of the scare or the easier-than-usual grin still fixed on your face. 
You lean against the side of his car and roll your eyes. “Oh, your heart’s too healthy to be in danger of attacks.” 
“What are you doing on this side of the car? You’re the passenger, you know.”
“Okay, listen.” You give him a very intentional look. It’s more eye contact than he’s used to from you, and it makes his guts go all twisty in a surprisingly nice way. “It’s completely up to you, of course, but I think I’m about to make you an offer you can’t refuse.” 
It clicks into place. “You’re drunk.” 
“Not very.” Your grin is a short fall from impish. Your eyes sparkle. God help him. “But you’re about to be.” 
James feels his eyebrows float up. “How do you figure?” 
“Because I’ve come to collect you. If you want.” 
“To collect me…where?”
“Inside,” you say, as though this should be obvious. You tip your head towards the restaurant. “We’ve just closed, and we have so much wine. Pleasepleaseplease, James, come in.” 
“Okay.” He’s letting you tug him from his car before he knows what he’s agreed to, only that one please will always be enough to get whatever you want from him. “Alright, love, but doesn’t your manager mind that you’re drinking their wine?” 
You let loose a bark of laughter, loud and sharp and totally unlike you. “Tom? Yeah, right.” 
Tom, James learns quickly upon entering the rowdy atmosphere of your workplace after hours, is younger than the both of you, hardly old enough to serve alcohol and yet managing the restaurant. And the wine isn’t stolen, necessarily, but the fortunate leavings of a wealthy customer who bought more bottles than his table could handle and then left nearly all of them. 
Everyone who’d been on the night shift is strewn about the empty restaurant. Servers and busboys and dishwashers all perched on stools, standing behind the bar, sitting criss-cross-applesauce on tables. You take James by the hand, first reclaiming the bottle of wine you’d evidently stored behind the host’s station and then leading him around the room to introduce him to various coworkers. His hand feels warm and tingly. You have an easy repartee and a million in-jokes with the servers, but even the kitchen staff seems to adore you. As they rightly should, James thinks. It’s obvious you’re as kind and considerate here as you are at home, and he feels a bit silly for not having been able to picture you in this place so clearly before now. 
Art is working with you again tonight. It’s embarrassing, the warm wave of relief that James feels when he notices you don’t pay him any extra attention. He makes a mental note to extend his offer of a ride home more often. Every time your hand starts to slip from James’, you readjust your grip before he can even think of doing it himself. Suits him just fine; ever since your mugging incident, suddenly James is in this weird place where he always wants a hand on you.
You say his name, and then the lip of a bottle is being pushed against his lips. 
“You haven’t had hardly any.” You look like you’re trying to pout, but your eyes are smiling. 
James takes the bottle from you. He looks you in the eyes as he takes a sip as if to say, Happy? It’s barely enough to warm his throat. “I am still driving us home, you know.”  
The pout is getting better. “I know, but I’m trying to be fun for you. You don’t have to drive us if you don’t want to! You’re always the one doing the nice things.” 
“Oh, don’t.” His tone is fonder than he means for it to be, but luckily you’re too tipsy to mind. “You’re plenty fun. You do nice things for me all the time.” 
“Yeah, but not enough to balance out.” You make your eyes big and pitiful. James feels fortunate this isn’t a skill you seem inclined to utilize sober. “Obviously you don’t have to if you don’t want to, but—Jamie, don’t hold back because of me, please.” 
His stomach does an impressive flip. He doesn’t think you realize you’ve called him that, doubts you’d have done it under normal circumstances, but his nervous system cares not for rationalizations. He wants desperately to hear you say it again. 
You beam as James lifts the bottle to his lips again, taking a few hearty gulps. You both end up walking home that night, but you wake even before James to go retrieve his car in the morning.
1K notes · View notes
lizlovestofangirl · 7 months ago
Text
"i wanna be yours"
basketballplayer!lukecastellan x unclaimed!reader
smau - your instagram if you were dating basketball player luke
🎧 - i wanna be yours by arctic monkeys
a/n: hi! i was really out of motivation to make anything, but you guys voted smau! i really want to try headcannons so pls leave asks for whatever you want to see! also, i'm getting close to 100 followers which is super exciting, thank you so much for the support :) (also, i know this is shorter than usual but i really like it!)
*swearing and suggestive content, not checked so there might be mistakes*
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liked by yn_yln, hi_imtyson, and others
itslukecastellan ballin w the boys
tagged hi_imtyson, _groverunderwood, percy.jackson, iamchrisrodriguez
view comments:
percy.jackson the teams were rigged
itslukecastellan you tripped over air
iamchrisrodriguez nah u and g-man are just bad
whosannabeth LMAOOO
yn_yln i, a proud viewer of this game, can confirm that not all demigods are good at basketball
percy.jackson ouch
itslukecastellan are u calling me bad?
yn_yln luke read that again
itslukecastellan oh sorry i missed the not im dyslexic af
_groverunderwoood well im a saytr so HA
yn_yln not all saytr are good either
larueclarisse put chris on a team with percy nect time he needs his ego checked
itslukecastellan will do
iamchrisrodriguez jeez clar
iamchrisrodriguez tuff
larueclarisse how you felt after commenting that: 🐺
silenaaaa the lighting is garbage
itslukecastellan ur garbage
yn_yln he doesnt mean that
yn_yln HOT
itslukecastellan thank you my love
percy.jackson you have him BLUSHING y/n
iamchrisrodriguez i thought i was your love 😔
itslukecastellan fuck off chris
yn_yln's story
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view reply from itslukecastellan:
itslukecastellan that was unkind
yn_yln 😇
view reply from iamchrisrodriguez:
iamchrisrodriguez new luke blackmail unlocked
yn_yln theres more where that came from trust
view reply from larueclarisse:
larueclarisse how did he pull u 😭
yn_yln idk maybe the jawline
larueclarisse bros been mewing since birth
yn_yln STOP
943 notes · View notes
maxlarens · 4 months ago
Note
ok so i had an idea for the rb photographer fic if you're up for it
first of all im like in love w ur fics i love em all
and nextly, listen to this..
charles isn't single but manwhore carlos probably is?
he flirts w our photographer and makes max jealous?? roped in by danny ofc to get them together?? what do you think??
anyway have a great day! <33333
UM OKAY THANK YOU! max x rbphotographer!reader are literally everything to me and i am SOO thrilled to have gotten this request. very in character for daniel to get everyone involved in scheming even tho max has told him not to😭 love it so much😇😇 hope u enjoy and i am SOOOO sorry this took so long xx
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MV: tonight (i wish i was your boy)
pairing(s): max verstappen x redbull photographer!reader
word count: 1.9k+
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Max likes to think he’s not a jealous person.
Max likes to think that— but it doesn’t mean it’s true. Daniel would and has, argued that Max is an abnormally jealous person. In the sense that Max doesn’t like to share. Doesn’t like other people playing with his toys. Not that he thinks of you (or Daniel) as his toy— that’s absurd. He’s a jealous person, not some territorial asshole with an anger problem. (Okay, sometimes he has an anger problem. He’s been working on it. It hardly crops up anymore, but he’s not territorial).
He is, again, bad at sharing, and also uniquely used to getting what he wants.
It’s not because he’s got a crush on you. Despite what Daniel would like to assume. It’s just that you’re meant to be his friend. You’re here with him, because of him. He’s meant to be able to hover around you all night, getting carried away as he tries to explain something meaningless while you give him that half-grin that you don’t even realise you’re doing most of the time. He’s the one who’s supposed to be putting his hand on your back, and leaning in to ask if you’d like another drink—
Not Carlos.
Definitely not Carlos.
(Well, at least it’s not Charles).
Instead, Max is standing next to an overeager Lando at the DJ deck, gripping his drink so hard that he’s mildly concerned the glass will shatter to pieces in his hand. Actually, that’s not such a bad idea to get your attention. Maybe if that happens you’ll stop looking at Carlos Sainz Jr with big googly eyes and you’ll come nurse his hand or whatever it is you’re supposed to do in pathetic little fantasies like the one he’s entertaining. You’re not really the nursing type though, you’re more prone to start freaking out and calling everyone on the Red Bull team to tell them that Max has irreparably damaged his hand.
Max stops entertaining that particular fantasy.
Daniel’s not here, he’s gone home to Australia for a few weeks and skipped out on this weird little grid (+ friends) party that Charles is throwing. This is good and this is bad for Max. On one hand Daniel is not here to rib him about his half-admitted crush on you, on the other hand Daniel is not here to distract him from his half-admitted crush on you. There’s Lando of course, who can be just as good in the distraction department, but it’s not quite the same. 
Lando doesn’t quite know about the raging crush, which is probably for the better. He’s been around when Lando’s tried to set up Oscar before and that was an absolute unmitigated disaster.
“Hey man,” speaking of Oscar, “You good?”
Max frowns and then half turns to look at Oscar who’s now hovering next to Lando with a fruity little drink in hand, “Yeah mate,” he answers, confused.
Oscar gets this weird little micro expression on his face that Max wouldn’t usually take any note of— his forehead creases, he raises a disbelieving eyebrow— but the skepticism grates at Max a little, leaves him wondering.
“Why?”, he caves.
Oscar shakes his head, shrugs, “You're kind of staring down Carlos."
Max's mouth falls open, just a little. He is not. His eyes flit to Lando unconsciously for confirmation before he has a chance to defend himself against what are frankly untrue allegations from Oscar. But Lando is already shrugging, making a face that says he has been.
Fuck. Max frowns. And doesn't say anything.
Better to stay quiet and look moody than to admit anything to these two. Total menaces. Well, no that's Lando. Oscar might be helpful. Still, Max isn't going to admit anything. Daniel and apparently Charles knowing about it is more than enough.
Their hushed conversation behind him fades into the background as Max turns again to look at you and Carlos— and alright he gets it now. There's definitely a different kind of set to his jaw, a scowl on his lips as he watches Carlos put his hand on your shoulder.
There is something in his gut. Something sick. The feeling he gets when he's on track and the car starts sliding, the wheels locking up. When hears the va-rum of a car go by, sees something that isn't wide open space in front of him. Something like panic starts to climb up his throat. He knows he shouldn't be this bothered by you and another person, but he can't get rid of this voice in the back of his head that says you might like Carlos more than him. That you might stop hanging around Max, texting him at all hours of the day with photos of your food or random questions, waiting for him in the garage after sessions and not just because you've got to take pictures of him, and going out for food on 'friend dates' as you've taken to calling them.
If you and Carlos... okay no, Max doesn't even want to think about it.
He starts walking over, trying to smooth his face into something less intimidating as he goes. He turns it into a strained, mouth-closed smile that doesn't reach his eyes. He directs it at Carlos.
There's a glint in Carlos' eyes that Max doesn't like the look of.
"Hi Max," he says, flashing his white teeth, he gestures to you, "I was just getting to know your lovely friend here."
Alright. Max understands instantly. This has Daniel's name written all fucking over it. Max's fake smile falls, turning into a flat look that he levels at Carlos. He's trying not to scowl because he doesn't want you to catch on to anything, but it's not easy. His phone is burning a hole in his pocket, he doesn't care if it's the middle of the night in Australia right now, he's itching to call Danny and ask him what the fuck he is thinking pulling something like this from 14,000 kilometers away?
"Mm," Max hums, unimpressed, unable to fake pleasantries even for your sake, "Great."
You look at him, eyebrows raised a little incredulously at his tone. There's slight amusement there too, he thinks, as he returns your look. You squint a little, as if to say, don't give me that look, Max Verstappen. He can feel himself smiling, the corner of his mouth lifting with ease even though the object of his anger still has his stupid hand on your shoulder.
He can't help himself when he reaches for your elbow, asks, "D'you wanna get a drink?"
You bite down on the edge of your smile, "Sure, Maxie."
You turn and say something to Carlos that he doesn't listen to. Partly because he doesn't care, partly because the sound of you saying Maxie is playing on a loop in his head, like it always does whenever you use the nickname. Which is more often than not. God, he loves it. Maxie Maxie Maxie. It sounds so syrupy sweet coming from your mouth. Smothered in affection. You're the only person, bar his mum and sister that he lets use it. Daniel sometimes, but Daniel would say it regardless, the menace that he is.
"Max," you say, hand on his bicep, thumb smoothing back and forth there, "Where'd you go?"
Max blinks. Carlos is gone now.
"Hm, no, nowhere," you frown, so he says, "Just a bit tired."
This seems to satisfy you. You slip an arm into the crook of his, linking them together as you tug him to the bar. You order him a G&T and yourself a glass of wine before the two of you head out onto the balcony where it's far quieter. Less people, less chatter. Max prefers it like this, with no one there to get in the way of your attention on him, his on you. He thinks you prefer it too.
He hopes you do at least.
You sip your wine, Max’s eyes linger on the line of your neck, the way your fingers curl around the glass, how your eyes glitter in the early afternoon sun.
“What was that earlier?”, you gesture inside, raising your eyebrows again, “With Carlos?”
Max laughs nervously without meaning to, “Uh, what do you mean?”
The ‘something sick’ is back in his gut again. He hopes you buy his nonchalance, but doesn’t feel confident you will. You know him too well. That’s his fault.
You sigh, “I mean the dick measuring contest, Maxie.”
Maxie. Maxie.
Then he finally registers your words around the loop of your voice in his head, he guffaws, almost choking on his drink, “The dick measuring contest!?”
“Yes,” you hiss, leaning forward on your stool, “Yes, Max. I’m not an idiot, you were getting territorial.”
Max blinks. Max feels red creeping up his neck. Max feels butterflies and maybe a chainsaw in his stomach.
“Wha—”, he tries again, “I—”
His mouth doesn’t appear to be working. Maybe because he’s not sure what on earth he’s supposed to say. What do you even mean? Are you trying to say that you know he was jealous of Carlos? That you know he has feelings for you? Or are you just referencing the fact that he’s weirdly territorial of his friends sometimes? What is he supposed to say in response to any of it? He can’t figure it out for the life of him.
Then you’re blushing you’re blushing and you’re saying, “You don’t have to worry, Max. You’re my favourite person here.”
Okay, alright, what the fuck does that mean? God. Max hates this. If you were any other girl he’d have asked you out literally years ago. But because you’re you and you’re his best friend besides Daniel, he can’t ask you out. He has to smother his feelings into something platonic because he cannot bear the idea of losing you.
Despite his better judgment telling him not to, Max asks, “Really?”
You hum, “Really, really.”
It happens in slow motion, it must. Or at least that’s how Max replays it in his head every night before he goes to sleep. You reach forward and put your hand over his, fingers on his wrist, thumb drawing a pattern on his upturned palm.
Then you say, in a way that he can’t figure out for the life of him, “Love you, Maxie.”
Chills run down the length of his spine, that chainsaw starts up again in his stomach. Love you, Maxie. He feels sick— like he might word vomit the entirety of his feelings for you right there and then. Instead, he forces himself to smile. Closed-mouth, eyes crinkled.
“Mm, yeah, love you,” he says back, his voice cracking as he tries to make it sound normal and platonic and not wracked with nerves.
You smile, warm, beaming and showing your teeth, like he’s made your day infinitely better by just saying those words. As if you’ve not just made his stomach churn and his heart take leaps and bounds in his chest. As if he’s not going to think about the way you’d said it every second of every day. As if he won’t dream of you saying it in every other context imaginable.
You pat his hand twice, then pull it back to take hold of your drink again. Smiling as if you’ve not ruined him for anyone else for good.
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