#the way im forgetting how to spell their names oop

[dilfosaur]

saw a "draw them like this" on twt and the speed at which i activated

[koalaaquabear]

The 5 hour finale live stream just concluded and y’all, it was crazy. It has been a wonderful several months with all you guys and I am so excited for April 8th and Junior Year. 

MASSIVE SPOILERS UNDER THE FOLD IF YOU HAVE NOT WATCHED THE STREAM YET. Here is my clusterfuck of a commentary. Enjoy!

Fantasy High: Sophomore Year Live Reaction -HOOT GROWL BABY it's time. I didn't react to part one but wOW that one was crazy. Get ready for EMOTIONS :'(( -SIG FIG RESCUE MISSION lol #ontour -well ok brennan that canopy shit is scary as fuck -murph is still looking like riz -Zaphriel and Ayda!!!!!!! -"HOLD ME BACK GORGUG" i love u emily -Brennan I stg -Ayda is Gorgug's dad lol -oh shIT they're totally in the cottage -heLL YEAH AYDA!! -oh GOD figayda kiss? exceptional. -if ayda dies i WILL throw dice at Brennan -ok brennan make me cry then -GET THE VAN GORGUG -gorgug truly is the greatest wizard of this age -#hugeblueguy -aww zac oyama i love you -"semi-fallen" oH dEar -gorgug texts zelda IMMEDIATELY i love him -amaZING thank you zelda -"ew, creepy, hate that" -zaphriel is the best character you guys, what a homie -i keep forgetting ayda can fly. like she has wings. i know that. -AELWYN! -nOPE someone is coming through the forest and if it's arianwen i will kill cry -HANGMAN???? -HANGMAN!!!! HIS DOG!!!!! -HANGMAN NO I LOVE YOU YOU'RE THE CUTEST DOGGY -adaine i love you baby -"the weak yogurt man" -what high ranking devil??? -fabian you're adorable -aww fabian has a puppy!! (i get that the hangman is eight feet long don't @ me) -that's the first "the ball" -lou can never have the highest roll -BARDY BOYS -oop kristen and riz time -tracker? i barely even know her -chills, brennan. chills -someone in the chat just said "so did skrank fuck zelda?" -intense muSIC -nononononononono -ragh, tracker, and sandralynn better be all right -ooo a sTICK -HELL YEAH RETURN OF THE RIBBON DANCE -"riz weeps" holy shit i love him -"something bad always happens when we go off together" -#RIZTEN -awwoOOOOOOO -ayda can fly too! -absolutely FUCK this bridge ABOUT 30 MINUTES -poor ayda -please say they're ok brennan -"put your tongue baCK in your mouth" -sANDRA LYNN NO -"what kind of arrows" "you know what kind" fuCK OFF BRENNAN -if baxter dies i will cry -wait faerie fire is a cleric spell..? absolutely fuck me -ok aelwyn let's fuck shit up -calling the bank in the middle of this nightmare forest lol -heLL YEAH ZAPHRIEL -luck check luck check luck check -"y'all are going to turn into dragons" -fabian straight up cries? what a fucking rich kid -NO WAY HE HAD T H E COIN??? -REMOVE CURSE BABY -"nnOOO!" lmao -ally and brennan are in the chat -kristen's religion is REALLY coming in handy -the name was turned into the night yorb lol -"how's that axe feeling?" "..pretty light ;)" i love him -ayda can lift the axe??? exceptional -FIG IS KALINA? ABSOLUTELY RAD -brennan has created a place where illusions are real and emily is holding him TO IT -"do you have a dongle?" incredible -EMILY I LOVE YOU! KALINA IS A YOUTUBER BABY -wretchrot is baCK baby -aelwyn i love that -"i am a low quality child" "yeah ayda you're a bad kid" -"hey bitch" emily axford is a goddess -im sorry cOURT OF ELDERS? -NO I WILL CRY -ROLL INITIATIVE TIME -go OFF hangman -ooo some high initiatives babyyy -zac oyama is my favorite ever -"trackerrr" -brian as soon as emily was threatened said "how dare you" -brennan you FUCK "i'm awake for all of this" FUCK YOU -fig and her mommy issues: an album -absolutely FUCK THE TREE GUY -kick that wood elf BITCH ABOUT ONE HOUR -fuck him UP fabian, shit in his gODDAMN mOUTh -"SPRING BREAK YOU STUPID MOTHERFUCKER" -pleASE BRENNAN LET HIM SHOOT HER WITH THE TINCTURE -spRING break this is for the corn god -okay nevermind riz is holding his action -i love the intrepid heroes they're adorable -"ice feast" fucking love them so much -yES the ball thank GOD -brennan..? -"her rage ends" tracker = barbarian -FIRST NAT 20 BABY -"IT 100% WORKS BUT IT 50% WORKED" -that's the second "the ball" -bOOOOOOO BRENNAN -mad plans for the tree guy -sorry, is his name crAFTME ROOTDRINKER? -oh ok it's aelwyn we're fine -cone of cOLD baby i love aelwyn what a babe -you absolutely hate to see it -ragh my baby i love you -SPRING BREAK -tracker nO PLEASE -TRACKER JUST CRIT OH NO -brennan is really good at acting this btw -wait 14 on a crit??? i mean oH NO kRISTEN, bOO -disPEL MAGIC BABY -ALLY BEARDSLEY YOU ABSOLUTE GOD -aww kristennn is babyyy -tracker nooo don't cryyyy -you've sAVED your GIRLFRIEND -"some of us have already done that today" fig the sHADE -ally simply musT get new dex -absolutely fuck that brennan i don't need that vampire pixie -FUCK IT UP AYDA -FIGHT ME IN THE SKY! -"does a 29 hit?" daMN zac that absolute SHADE -53 DAMAGE?? CHEJ IS SO FUCKING STRONG -"goddamn paper lantern" -absolutely fuck you brennan -nevermind gorgug and adaine both passed the con saving throw -"i don't like you" lou really gets personally upset about this and i love that -nO NO NONONONO aelwyn and tracker are down -FUCK IT UP ADAINE -gdi brennan don't do this to us -ABSOLUTELY FUCK THE TREE -fig is straight up gonna kill her mom -this is scary as fuck -HANGMAN HAS A BREATH WEAPON AND YOU DIDN'T SAY SHIT??? CHOKE ON GRAPES BRENNAN -FUCK EM UP HANGMAN ABOUT 1 HOUR AND A HALF -wood elf is DOWN baby hoot growl -kristen thinks the elf is gak lol -23 DAMAGE??? AC OF 25??? ABSOLUTELY FUCK IT UP FABIAN -SHENANIGANS TIME FOR MURPH -HELL SECRET AGENT TIME -27??? RIZ YOU'RE THE HOTTEST -third the ball -imagine the ball is secretly SO HOT without the hat -YES BRENNAN GOT A NAT 1 EAT YOUR GODDAMN DICE -sweEET -fourth the ball (they've all been Lou cuz of course) -incredible turn murph -kalina is SO GOOD at skateboarding -#bloodphoto -KALINA HAS 23 WISDOM? absolutely fuck me -oh hELL YEAH FIG COUNTER THE COUNTER -emily is doing some SHIT right now you guys (fear spell) -DAMMIT that high as fuck wisdom -sorry WHAT she rips open sPACE??? -BABY BETTER SAVE THE GODDAMN DAY -let's go BABY -"mMMHHHHnnN leET ME tOUCh ItT" baby is fucking weird -"baby vs mommy" i love you siobhan -aelwyn better not DIE brennan -riz baby let's get it -trACKEr -nAT 1??? kristen is unCONSCIOUS?? -HUMAN DETERMINATION!!! THE GRIT BABY] -wait aura of life is badass!! they can't lose damage?? -okay scrap that we're gonna TURN UNDEAD and then MASS HEALING WORD? absolutely incredible -gorgug has so much goddamn health -FUCK THIS TREE DUDE -KILL IT AYDA LET'S GO -"her girl's side" *in lou voice* okAY bRENNNAn -second nat 1 but both of them re-rolled -GEM!!!! -LET'S GET GORTHALAX BABYYYY -"BIG DADDY" -ayda is so turned on lol -KILL IT CHEJ OKAYYYY -fuck this centaur -i'm so nervous -puT THOSE DICE DOWN BRENNAN -"you're gonna drop." shuT UP -riz is fULLY DEAD???? -i hate this. i hate this. i hate this. i hate this. i hate this. i hate this. -sHUT UP BRENNAN -baby is DEAD oh my GOD you absolutely hate to see it ABOUT 2 HOURS -nO NO NO NO NO NO NO PUT THAT CROWN AWAY BITCH -absolutely fuck me, the nightmare king is totally fucking back i hate myself -aww fabian is baby -hELL YEAH FABIAN SPRING BREAK -"i've lost one friend, that's too many" fabian is adorable -"that's a full ass miss, my guy" -sandra lynn just crit on chej :(((((( -14 damage is not very spring break of her (she did 28 but it was halved because gorgug is such a strong boyyy) -LET'S GO LOU -almost all of them are spellcasters wtf (only one who isn't is riz but he has a daily misty step) -fuck em up hangman -fUCK EM UP HANGMAN! d8 + 2d6 +8 i think -figaroth the unfaethable baby -THOSE ARE SOME SHENANIGANS FIG I LOVE IT (she's shattering the rubies to get a revivify diamond) -casts teleport??? aelwyn came here to FUCK -"i would love to teach you this spell" aww the abernant sisters liking each other is my new aesthetic -fuck em up adaine -you can hit the tree on a 12 babyyyyy -heLL YEAH 44 DAMAGE ADAINE IS STRONG NOW -kalina is not even that cool she just said "that's enough of that" in the most uncool way -2 down 3 to go! -omg wait it would be so badass if they could just remove curse on kalina -"Mr. The Insatiable" -ayda is such a sweetheart "i don't care if you want me to date your daughter but i do hope you love me" -"I LOVE THIS SONG" yes siobhan me too -on a DC 20 she got a 31!!!! consider my jeans creamed -SHRED BABY GIRL!!! -KILLIAN IS DEAD! RIZ IS ALIVE! -ayda is so turned on AHHH -I LOVE RIZ SO MUCH "am i interrupting something???" -fuck him UP chej! 3 hits, no crits -hell yeah mr. march!! oh sorry wrong series -a gROUP PROJECT i'm DEAD -someone in the chat called him "snac oyama" and you're rigHT -siobhan's straight fucking this tree UP -the spellcasters are like all out of spells at this point -fuck OFF arianwen. KILL YOUR MOM -"where's your father, aelwyn?" "last i saw, adaine killed him so *shrug*" i lOVE HER -FUCK THEM UP GORTHALAX -abolutely fuck the nightmare king -waIT GORTHALAX IS GONNA KILL THE NIGHTMARE KING -sidenote: fig calls gorthalax pops -dO IT BRENNAN kILL YOUR OWN BIG BAD -this treeant has GOT to be dead -NAT 1 on that attack?? SPRING BREAK BABY -no we haven't seen kalina in action brennan, and we do not want to -OH SHIT THE TIE! YOu just got FUCKed bRENnan eaT youR DICE -yeS AYDA ROAST HER -"GOTTEM!" -i'm sorry i just hallucinated, did you say 6 ATTACKS? -time to go VIRAL BABY -19 intelligence, 23 wisdom, 20 charisma for kalina? absolutely fuck me -riz just got kICKed! you absolutely hate to see it -GODDAMMIT -KALINA IS HOMOPHOBIC CONFIRMED ABOUT 2 AND A HALF HOURS -brennan be like "im about to kill this bird" -absolutely fuck me i hate this -let's go FIG -time to caTCH the bALL -murph has the same thinking face as riz and it's adorable -this is not very spring break brennan -DC 25 acrobatics check? c'mon faBIAN -29????? -fifth the ball (from the hangman) -"there's just something endearing about him" fabian loving his friends is adorable -absolutely fuck me that fire elemental is adorable -absolutely swaddle the ball -well hot take but fuck the nightmare king you guys -absolutely NOT brennan do NOT kill adaine you PSYCHO BITCH -PLEASE ADAINE LIVE -STRAIGHT DEAD? FULLY DEAD? FUCK OFF WITH THIS INSTAKILL SHIT BRENNAN -hell yeah ayda is back and kristen has the revivify diamond -aelwyn FULLY banished that unicorn -it's good to know ragh really doesn't want them to die -YES RAGH IS BACK BABY -fuck em up kristen -s/o to DND Beyond btw absolutely banger website -hell yeah mass healing word is awesome -clerics are GOOD you guys i should play more clerics -FUCK IT UP AYDA -SANDRA LYNN IS BACK BABY -skater chej is my favorite thing -aBSOLUTEly fuck the tree -i have no idea wHAT is happening ABOUT 3 HOURS -fuCK YOU nightmare king -i absolutely hate this battle but at least gorthalax is still standing -gorgug better split this gd tree -"what if we just kill kalina?" yeah zac it's that goddamn easy -brennan almost just fucked everyone -"does she want to borrow my teddy bear?" the SHADE -"MAKEOVERRR" i love you siobhan -this tree SUCKS -battlemaster is cool as fUCK SPRING BREAK -BARDY BOYS also i think that was a nat 20 -i can't imagine the thistlesprings watching the battle livestream and like worrying if gorgug is going to die -FUCK HER UP THE BALL -ABSOLUTE SHENANIGANS FROM MURPH! -with ADVANTAGE BABY -"has anyone seen my hat!?" keep it off baby you're HOT now -"mirrors negate mirrors" "i think oscar wilde said that" i love them -#hotrizweek? -holy shit fig is FUCKING THIS BATTLE UP -HELL YEAH KALINA ROLLS A NATURAL 2!!!! -hell yeah adaine is back and SO MUCH is happening that i'm like forgetting to write down my reactions -kill this woody motherfucker baby -the music is too lOUD -ok it's normal now -fuck em up gorgug -i'm sorry the chat is saying he did 90 DAMAGE?!?!?!? -KILL IT CHEJ ILY -fuck off brennan, absolutely fuck off -ABSOLUTELY FUCK OFF BRENNAN -gorthalax is FULLY DEAD? absolUTELY FUCK YOU -SAINT KRISTEN APPLEBEES -adaine has SOLVED THIS SHIT -god all the abernant names are confusing -fuck you kalina ABOUT 3 AND A HALF HOURS -BRENNAN I STG IF RAGH ENDS UP DEAD -hellish rebuke that bitch -c'MON faBIAN HIT that BITCH -wait is kalina a rogue and a druid? absolutely incredible -FUCK IT UP FABIAN -OMG THE HANGMAN BETTER FUCK THIS UP -YES THE BALL 31 DAMAGE -so the stream just ended. i'll say it again: absolutely fuck me -ok so we're back and kalina got fucked up -WHAT THE FUCK A NAT 20???????? YOU ABSOLUTELY LOVE TO SEE IT -ALLY WHAT THE FUCK IS UP WITH THIS -I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS AND NEITHER CAN BRENNAN -MAGIC IS REAL AND SO IS MY ALLY -i can't believe this. eat your GOD damn DICE brennan! -OMG ARE THE NIGHTMARE KING AND THE GODDESS ONE AND THE SAME? -THEY ARE! THE NIGHTMARE KING IS THE NIGHTMARE QUEEN -brennan is CRAZY AHHHHH -brennan absolutely stop this tension -28 insight. brennan is fucked -GO TOWARDS HIM KRISTEN -YES!!!! PLEASE SAY THIS IS A GOOD THING -ALLY GOT A NAT 20 THEY BETTER BE RIGHT -fear. is. not. real. -this is just like the ending of moana -NO WAY BRENNAN I LOVE YOU (you wouldn't believe it from what i have said but it's true) -this is intense i'm about to cry -you're meeting god and you say "is it too early for this?" -LMAO 5'9" -Moral of the story: IDK and that's OK -ok ally make me cRy -HELL YEAH NEW SHIRT BABY -i'm so emotional -"well oBVIouslY cASsAndRa" i wish every deity had names as normal and human as cassandra -fuck them UP cassie -i love that tracker's just like "uh... babe?" -love having god in your corner -no more hangman puppy :((( -RIZTEN are the CUTEST i love them "i love all of them, riz the most, we know this" -"we still need the crown for our grade" FABIAN I LOVE YOU -"counselo- former counsel- i'm an assistant :(" why do y'all think this man is hot -KILL ARIANWEN -"she tried to hurt me in my shattered state?" "that's her MO" aww adaine my baby -HOLY SHIT PLEASE GIVE GILEAR ALL OF ARIANWEN'S MAGIC -GORGUG YOU SWEETHEART I LOVE YOU -cassandra throwing SHADE -ThE vANdS -aelwyn throwing SHADE -AWW RAGH I LOVE YOU BABY brennan lives another day -"a big bug gave me a riddle" that is NOT what happened -aww the hirelings are all crying and i DO NOT stan -hell YEAH cassandra OH I STOPPED KEEPING TRACK OF TIME IT'S BEEN OVER 4 HOURS -hELL YES HANGVAN -i love you fabian -nO IS CHUNGLE DOWN BIM REAL? -maybe the real chungle down bim is the friends we made along the way -GARTHY i love them -arthuR aGUEFORT - absolutely wild -ayda and arthur is crazy -"snOGGING THE HEADMASTER'S DAUGHTER ARE WE?" -awww that is so smooth fig "you don't need to make me the most magnificent creature because it seems you already have" -ARTHUR PULLS THROUGH -garthy is a cutie i love how they care so much for ayda -oH FUCK ME garthy is ayda's child from her previous life -"your girlfriend's daughter fucked your mom!" goddammit siobhan i can't handle this -if they fail i will cry -CHRONOMANCY!? absolutely fuck me -"professor principal headmaster aguefort" -hell yeah arthur you're killing it -faelwyn? absolutely can't handle it -aww kristen is baby -jawbone and sandra lynn are ok? amazing -jawbone is the best character -"our parents are great" kill me why don't you siobhan -AWWW FUCKING STOP BRENNAN WITH THESE GIFTS -i just cried he wants to adopt her -"you're easy to love" jawbone is fUCKING me up -LYDIA BARKROCK what a badass i love her already -"a pheonix whom everyone she touches is reborn better" fuck off emily -gorgug is a cutie <3 <3 -ABSOLUTELY KICK SKRANKS BIRD ASS -GORGUG CONFIRMED FUCKS -riz is a dork i love him -who knew "you're so much like your father" could make me feel like that -GILEAR IS MOVING THE FUCK IN BABY -GILEAR WITH SELF CONFIDENCE IS MY AESTHETIC -aww jawbone gave ayda autism books? jawbone is the sweetest to ayda cuz OF COURSE HE IS -AYDA GETS HER SPELL!!! -Ayda's Comprehend Subtext is the cutest spell ever -adaine and fig's friendship is too cute -craig has always been down for everything. i don't know craig but i love him -YES HOOT GROWL HOOT GROWL I'M SO PROUD OF RAGH -"BAD KIDS FOR LIFE" RAGH IS A CUTIE -NO FAELWYN IS REALLY HAPPENING I CAN'T -fabian's laugh is so cute -i love how nervous fabian is -WAIT FABIAN AND AELWYN ABSOLUTELY WILL FUCK? -fabian's gonna get his KISSES IN -aww i get how hyped figayda is but they are truly so adorable -weLL EMILY AXFORD I WILL LET YOU HURT ME LIKE THAT -they said i love you :((( -tracker only deserves the best -TRACKER'S GOING TO FALLINEL? I LOVE HER -ragh is going too? gay road trip! -that's adorable -ABSOLUTELY NOT BRENNAN FUCK OFF DO NOT SAY THE NIGHT YORB IS GONNA BE THE NEXT VILLAIN -BRENNAN NO YOU BITCH I HATE YOU THE NIGHT YORB IS THE VILLAIN OF JUNIOR YEAR? -that was crazy. i cried, i laughed. i am fuCKING HYPED FOR CROWN OF CANDY AND JUNIOR YEAR GANG!

[ask-vaal-hazak]

I just left a homebrew dnd campaign I've a message for new DM's

If your running a campaign for 2 ppl and there level 3 do not throw cr 6 and 9 monsters at them. For the love of the divine do not.

Extremely fustrating and deadly. And dont use the monsters from a homebrew forum bc it just sounds cool. Bc that "cool" cr 6 hag going against a lv3 party with multiple attack. Multiple spell cast and spell immunity and able to polymorph into any creature it wants at will is devastating.

Just to rant here. I lost 3 characters in 1 hour. My lv 3 barbarian (minotaur zelot). My battlemaster (centaur) and my wizard (yuan ti)

To be a dm ya have to balance and make sure every fight isnt designs to just upright kill ppl at the start bc. 5d12 worth of dmg with multiple attack on a hag or any creature. Is friggin broken.

There no way in hell a monster for a party of 2, level 3 adventures should hit for 5d12 (3 times) and be able to cast 2 spells (at will without using a spell slot) EVERY ROUND. And on top of that have a movement speed of 90 and an ac of 23. (I asked the dm to let me see what he was using and thers more. Swim of 30, fly of 300 ect this is pretty much a god with its stats but the cr says 6. It dosent even feel like a 6. More like a lv 20 broken sack of crap)

This is the reason there are tutorial guides in the book(s) and youtube to show you why you should look at cr then your players levels b4 u design an encounter.

I cant describe how fustrating it was to see my barbarian. Who I spent 5hours making just get tapped lightly and die. Bc 48 hp at lv 3 and taking well over 10 pts of dmg bc apparently she crit me on all attacks and only did like 1 attack to our female player (for 2 dmg with a level 6 scorching ray [its bs] ) was "Fair bc your a barbarian and should be able to tank this EASILY" (quote the dm.)

If there is a way to piss off players it's this and having a game were you get railroaded so hard it's a traveling trip with skill checks with a minimum of 18-20 to notice something like a bear on the road when the weather is CLEAR and everyone is PAYING THE HELL ATTENTION ON A BANDIT HIGHWAY. Not to mention the SCREAMS OF A CYCLOPS AS IT LITERALLY SMASHES INTO THE CARAVAN ACROSS A PLANE WITH A FEW TREES ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD.

Oh and let me not forget the NPCS WHO WANT TO SLEEP WITH EVERYONE BC THEY THINK THERE HOT AND DESERVE A NICE HOT MEAT ROD FOR THEIR SERVICES OF INTRODUCING THEMSELVES.

*Facepalm* my god....oh and if your thinking

"GEE-WILLY Mr. Person surely it couldnt be that bad?" This guys campaign was pretty much parappa the rapper, jojo bizarre adventures, bloodborne, Resident evil and memes.

I had a character who came in and apparently they caused the world to have wormholes? (Somehow) and referenced it everytime we played even when that character died. In session one. Bc apparently a company named (I kid you not) Shoe Rack was the equivalent of resident evil's umbrella cooperation. Complete with a drow leader and a litch bookkeeper who turned everyone into zombies to work for free while they apparently made diamonds to sell for millions of gold and keep the workers working g for 1 copper every month. Only giving gold to ppl that would sleep with them.

Not to mention apparently everyone in this world had magic resist or spell immunity to everyone except to females. And when I made a female char apparently that rule became I valid and it was just a straightforward

Me: does a 17 hit?

Dm: well it would but .... *they grin*

Me: but?

Dm: they use a special ring to catch the spell and cast meteor swarm on you point blank.

Me: well they get hit too I just stabbed them with a dagger.

Dm: no you see it's a SMALL METEOR THAT ONLY HITS THE PERSON THAT HIT THEM

Me: so they and my teammate. Who has literally been stabbing them are fine?"

Dm: yes

Me (takes like 589 pts of dmg and is ded)

Dm: the litch turns to you and asks if you want a cup of coffee.

Female player: umm sure?

Dm: whoo-yeah. Combat over you get 500 go and a date with the litch.

Me: I'm sorry what?

Female player: umm...ok. awsome.

Me: ......ok cool so I'll just bring in-

Dm: no that's cool the litch revives yorubas a female zombie slave.

Me: why?

Dm: and you need to have sex to keep yourself alive.

Me: yeah no. I'll just bring in my centaur battle master

1 hour later

Dm: you take umm..let's see *rolls dice.*

Me: (waiting)

Dm: *rolls a shit ton more dice*

Me: (waiting)

Dm: oh oh no *grins*

Me: (takes 40 dmg) I'm still up

Dm: how?

Me: I have 48 hp....I'm still up

Dm: ok it's your attack I guess.

Me: rolls a nat 1 "ok I guess I have disadvantage on my next att-"

Dm: rolls a d100 and a d10 (the percentile)

Me: what are you doing?

Dm: rolling for severity of your fail. Btw how much dmg does your lance do?

Me: it does 1d12 dmg and why are you using severity. That's not in 5e and you said we-

Dm: as you fail you accidentally stab yourself in the throat as your spear hits a rock and you take *rolls dice* 35 pts of dmg

Me: ok I'm out that's bs. Number one and two I have a lance and thers no way I can do 35 dmg. I get about 24 dmg on a crit and 28 if I use my racial feature to kick a person at max with a crit.

Dm: oh your just being salty, you dont play fair!

Me: excuse me?

Dm: ALL YOU DO IS PLAY SPELL CASTWRS AND THATS CHEATING!

Me: bc everyone has spell immunity for some reason or only takes 1/4 the dmg. I'm pretty much useless and am being fored to play melee unlike our LOREMASTER BARD who got an item to DOUBLE HER DMG AND SPELL SLOTS AND CRIT ON A 15 PERMANENTLY (this is the female btw)

Dm: well maybe you should have slept with the litch

Me: she literally found that item in a store for like 3 silver and when I looked (with a 17 arcana check) I found a rusty dagger and a flask of poisoned potion.

Dm: well maybe roll higher?

Female player: umm I rolled like a 10 and found this that's kind of cool but I dont think it's fair. But o wanna keep my items

Dm: ugh fine. You keep yours. Ummm (to me) I guess you get a potion of greater healing for....umm 500 go.

Me:.......nah I'm good, FUCK IT. I'll just make another spell caster Oops. Cant do that. How about a nope. Cant make a barbar I'm going to make a artificer

Dm: cant do that

Me: why?

Dm: they're broken its not good.

Me: *with the book* not broken..ulyou know what why dont you make me a character and I'll use that.

Dm: hands me a sheet

Me: reads "Zonia the sexy zombie elf sex slave that gets stronger every time she has sex?" *Looks at everyone* ok I'm out enjoy the campaign.

Dm: we cant have a dnd adventure with only 1 person.

Me: yes you can you've been doing it since session 1. I'm out goodbye. I'm still running my campaign on sunday. I wont hole anything against you. But I will not sit here and be shit on bc I refuse to kiss yur ass and make a slut of a character. Pull your head from your ass. I'm taking my stuff and I'm out.

Dm: but I need the dm screen and the mat and the markers.

Me: then buy your own or use theater of mind. I'm out.

Like how bad is it to want to be a dm to shit on ppl. THIS, THIS IS NOT OK. and no one wants a zombie sex slave that can only have sex and has a str of 0 a con of 30 a dex of 1 a cha of 40 and so on. Its friggin stupid!

Anyway that's my rant. Im....I think I'm just done with dms and crap I just want to play a dnd game I can be happy with. And not always be the Forever dm. Who has players challenge everything. Like why as a monk they cant use sleight of hand to CATCH A FRIGGIN FIREBALL AND/OR AN ARROW AIMED AT ANOTHER PERSON.

Anyway leave a comment or add on I'm just burnt out and glad I could get this rant off my chest

[floorbed]

7 19 23 35 40 52 69 for The Jester and The Crimegirl

thank you so much bee omg i loved the questions u made sm!!! time for Them. this is super super long im sorry njdkkfkrenkjr

7. which party member do they understand the least?

for pen it is probably alba if he had to pick anyone? just because he can do Crazy Shit Sometimes. but pen still feels like he understands him v well!!

for agni its probably elvira! she is from a place she knows next to nothing about besides what elvira’s explained or what she’s learned from school, she is 100+ years old, yeah! while agni doesnt like fully Understand her she still thinks she’s really cool!! it was rlly nice of her to try and comfort her when she initially found out abt Rei Time. and also knitted her a pretty holster that was so nice of her!!

19. what haunts them? what doesn’t?

pen’s is home. so mf much he genuinely loves his party a lot and has gotten really attached but also like he misses home so bad it hurts. he felt like he was an intrinsic part of something that he fit perfectly and was never gonna have to give up, and he got to be w everyone he cared about all day. he’s haunted by mikolai’s wedding lol. he’s also haunted by The Shit That Went Down Pertaining To His Exile, His Subsequent Exile, Making the Pact,  Dying, Making The Pact Pt 2, The Thing He Had To Do After He Made The Pact, And Then Also Dying Again. he’s haunted by holding ori dead in his arms and bringing her back using power he now understands was from a Not That Great Place. he barely knew her then but he still thought about it all the time, and now he thinks abt it even more lol! he just is not used to life being. Like This. at all. he was a vvvvvv spoiled kid. (some nobility complex part of him is haunted by lydia! stupid jester!) 

he’s not haunted by everyone he’s been a bitch to lol, unless he vocally apologized for it later nfjnf. he’s not haunted by vargas. uh

agni is not haunted by most things and That’s On her super healthy coping mechanism! she tries to not think about her personal life with that much weight, she tries to keep it abstract in her head? but also there are some things she can’t help but get Unnamed Bad Feeling from instinctively. rei. w how last session fucking turned out lol, watching seras collapse in the doorway Will Def Become One. Moms Time, both for individual reasons. sometimes, not being accomplished, but that also filters into Moms Time. everything else tho she kind of just vibes through. 

23. how do they feel about nicknames, titles, or labels that have been given to them? how do they feel about their name?

pens Official Title is penance the jester, court jester of tarbyen (and he makes sure no one forgets it lol.) everyone he grew up around had official titles so it made him feel realllyyy good abt himself that he had one too! (he likes that the party’s nicknamed him pen tho, he thinks its sweet >:) ) his Name name is camil, but only his mom n mikolai called him that, so he thinks its very like..... informal, and he likes being a Formal Title Boy, but also it makes him go all soft bc the two ppl he loved most called him that!! conflicting feelings. 

agni’s had her nickname since she was really young i think, one of those like, you’re in fantasy kindergarten and learning how to spell and your first name is rlly long, so u employ a nickname very early Kind Of Moments. her full name is agnodice and she likes it well enough! it feels very kind of like. stiff and formal to her tho. she thinks agni suits her better!

35. which party member do they worry for?

pen worries for All Of Them. he tries to follow juni when he’s having one of his (as pen puts it) “freak out moments” bc he’s scared someday it’s going to be something that really hurts him, and he wants to be there to help if it does. pen has fully accidentally triggered ori before, and he feels really bad about it, especially since her triggers literally Set Her On Fire. so you know. he tries to be really careful with his words around her, especially since the incident a couple sessions ago. also, he is Very Concerned abt all of her past stuff with the mahne that he’s recently learned abt, especially putting together all the past knowledge she’s given him abt the river and what to do in a pact and Where Exactly She Got That Info From. he’s grateful she’s not in any of that anymore, though, whatever the mahne is exactly. alba’s impulsivity worries pen n he wants to make sure alba doesnt accidentally Put Himself In A Situation accidentally w that someday. 

agni worries for theodosia, just because she seems to know a lot about the fucked up illness time thats going on and it seems to rlly effect her and she knows it cld be coming from prior past experience? she also worries for cyrus because of the whole you know. his family’s shop and home being burned to the ground Situation, even though theyve since recovered it couldnt have been good for him. worries for kai, also, because he is Small Baby Boy. but worries as in like. does so in her agni way and it may not come across as such?

40. do they enjoy poetry?

pen loves poetry he heard a lot of epics at home!! the stories were Less fun when it was about like, war and bloodshed and stuff, but he loved them when they were all pretty n flowery or like romantic 🥺

agni likes hearing poetry recited, especially when it has a specific repetitive syllable pattern she can get lost in!

52. from whom do they seek validation?

pen simply be like [wants validation from nobility noises]. its his Complexes. thats why being @ ravenloft rn is so... bad for him lol bc hes getting like all the positive attention from important people hes wanted for his entire life, oops. hes literally living out a dream being asked to dance with someone so important!! he also seeks validation a lot from like powerpful women bc of growing up with his mom and how much he looked up to her and cared about her, which manifests itself a lot w wanting attention from ori and jenny (and previously w lady wachter lol) and also the lady of delights. 

growing up agni sought validation from her mothers n instructors, now (while she still wants momsvalidation) she looks for validation mostly from herself, which is kind of bad bc she never feels fully satiated w her work n accomplishments! 

69. how would they describe their party members?

for pen: ori feels like an older sister to him, hes too scared to express as much, but yeah! she is warm (he means figuratively but also lol) and Kind and Competent and Smart and above all, Safe. he defintely feels like, the safest with her than anyone else he’s encountered in his life, both i mean in the physical protection sense but moreso the emotional sense! yeah. juni is.,, complicated. at first pen was uhhh scared of him bc of the whole Sorcerer Thing, but after all of them talked abt it at jenny’s, that feeling passed and he was more just concerned for him than anything. he is Powerful and Pretty and even though he’s been thru a lot of things pen himself cant even comprehend juni’s still Soft and Understanding and pen really admires that about him! alba is Also Complicated, for different reasons. pen thinks he is Reckless and Impulsive but also Smart in his own little scheme way, and pen really appreciates him as like a constant in his life? like yeah, he is scary and concerning sometimes but he’s always Predictably as such and while pen doesn’t see alba as all that loyal in general pen is kind of blind to that stuff when it comes to ppl in relation to him, so he’s just glad he’s met someone that wants to stick with him.

for agni: cyrus is so nice to her!! he feels like a capital f Friend in her head and so far like. she’s only had one of those before so thats really cool!! he helps her out a lot and she tries to do what she can to be there for him too! it was nice of him to teach her abt Beach Swimming. theo is really cool and agni loves seeing her in her element doing Medicine Stuff she thinks she is really smart w that kind of thing and rlly respects her practice, agni’s also very interested in her magic!! she thinks dendy is small little lizard guy who sings silly songs. greatly appreciates him. she wld follow kai blindly into terrible plans because she wants to make sure this cool teen is alright , is thankful to know he can turn into a bear at will and she didnt do that on accident that one time! amadeus is confusing and hard to keep track of in her head, but at the end of the day she thinks he’s very caring and just looking out for people. adaeze is really fun to hang out with and she is both concerned and greatly impressed w her just straight up downing one of fer’s Fucked Up And Evil Potions no questions asked, bc thats something even Agni’s too scared to do. thinks her sword is very interesting in terms of the arcane, wants to see what happens w all that! elvira is super different from anyone agni’s been around but she thinks she’s an amazing artist and would love to see her home bc she talks about it so vividly!! 

[rynhaswritersblock]

new york boy (hc) | p.p.

a/n: 50TH IMAGINE WOWOWOWOWOWOWOWWWWWWWWWWW!! this shit go 🅱razy!

summary: life is hard when you visit your uncle in new york and all of a sudden there's a cute boy named peter parker in your life (i suck at summaries just stick with me here)

warnings: the usual fluff/hella cussing + like a minute of slight angst, also DEADASS THIS IS LIKE 8.5K WORDS I GOT SO SO SOOOOOO CARRIED AWAY AHSAHDJFKSNFK

ALSO I APOLOGIZE FOR ANY INCONSISTENCIES OR TYPOS OR ANYTHING I LITERALLY WROTE THIS OVER A FEW DAYS AND GOT SO CARRIED AWAY WITH DIFFERENT PLOTLINES AND BASICALLY WHAT IM SAYING IS THIS IS VERY VERY CHAOTIC BUT I HOPE YOU GUYS GET THE POINT LOL

+ + +

- SECOND HEADCANON IN A ROW YEAHYEAH

- you guys i've had a one direction relapse i was literally Obsessed with them like eight years ago (when they were still together rip) and all of a sudden they are just living in my brain Rent Free once again

- btw harry is my favorite and always has been. call me basic but it's been an eight year bond so try and fight that 😌✋

- anyways time to write the actual fucking story

- haha Oops!

- no i didn't accidentally spell oops "opps" at first. the fact that you even think that is complete absurdity

- CAN LITTLE THINGS BY 1D STOP MAKING ME EMOTIONAL RIGHT NOW

- this is the eighth bullet point and i have yet to get into the actual story holy fuck

- guys i just watched knives out (yeah i know i'm late whatever) and i haven't fully processed it yet but it was Muy Bueno!

- STEAL MY GIRL IS PLAYING

i knowwww i knowwww i knowwww for sure

EVERYBODY WANNA STEAL MY GIRL

EVERYBODY WANNA TAKE HER HEART AWAY

- i am so sorry

- OKAY THIS IS WHERE THE ACTUAL STORY STARTS HOLY SHIT

- yeah ❤

- SO BASICALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- fuck what is this imagine about again?

- OH RIGHT

- OKAY

- YOU'RE TONY STARK'S NIECE OKAY

- don't ask me how that works i have No Fucking Clue (which i'm sure you've gathered at this point)

- (i don't know what i'm doing)

- y'all i've got a headache but ❤ nevertheless she persisted ❤

- so basically

- you live like

- not... in new york...?????????

- so like SOMEWHERE ELSE

- let's say you live in like california

- YEAHYEAH OKAY

- SO LIKE YK HOW TONY USED TO LIVE IN CALI

- so you and uncle tones (😌) were super close when he lived in cali and he'd like pick you up from school and get you ice cream and basically be the Coolest Uncle Ever

- ur mom (let's say she's tony's sister) would be like 🙄 whenever he'd goof around with u but she loved y'all's relationship

- ain't that fluffy

- but THEN

- tony moved to new york

- bitch how fucking rude is that

- so u were like

- a little dead inside

- but that was when you were like six so time moved at Hyper Speed back then and you don't really like Remember the Pain 😀

- OH AND BY THE WAY KINDA IMPORTANT SIDE NOTE!!!!!

- SINCE UR MOM GOT MARRIED SHE TOOK YOUR DAD'S LAST NAME (aka l/n) AND YOU KEEP THE FACT THAT TONY IS YOUR UNCLE A SECRET FOR LIKE SAFETY REASONS IG LOL

- Anyways! from there on you only visit once a year and be there for a week

- but u best BELIEVE those visits were HYPE AS FUCK YEAHYEAH

- when you turned 13 ur mom surprised you by finally letting you start going by yourself

- badass 13 year old y/n 😌

- so u were like Heck Yeah!

- YeahYeah 😀😀😀

- happy picks you up from the airport and ur like "uh hi"

- ANYWAYS THE POINT IS YOU START TRAVELLING TO NEW YORK ALONE

- SO!!!!!!!!!! WE ARE NOW IN PRESENT TIME

- you go on your annual trip

- happy picks you up as per usual

- the usual awkward convo goes on which typically goes something like:

"are you excited to see your uncle" "yeah" "cool" "mhmm"

- yeah ❤

- but anyways by the time you're like 10 mins away you're practically Bouncing in your seat

- happy is like.... Girl. Calm Down! 😀

"oh by the way tony has the kid over today"

- bro Huh???????????

- ??????

- "the kid" Very Specific Thank You!

- you're like "who tf is the kid"

"spider-man"

......

😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳😳

- your head SPINS over to happy

"he's SPIDER-MAN?"

- happy just gets that Smug Smile Look on his face (y'all know the face) and shrugs, pulling into the garage

- you JUMP out of the car

- you wanna see sum real speed?

"identific-"

"FRIDAY! it's y/n let me in!!!"

- bitch calm down

"welcome back, y/n"

- WANNA SEE SUM REAL SPEED? 2.0

- you BUST through the doors

- not to mention your backpack is Barely Hanging On and happy is still in the garage hurling your suitcase out of the trunk

- sorry happy 😔😔

- happy ain't lookin so happy rn!

"friday, where's my uncle?"

"he's in the laboratory"

- WANNA SEE SUM REAL SPEED?????? 3.0

- go! go! go! go! go! go! go! go!

- spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬

- you FLY down the stairs to the lab

- tony looks over and a smile immediately breaks on his face

- you look disheveled as HELL cause you're like panting and Far Too Excited

- peter looks over and sees you and is like 0_0

- as soon as you see peter you're ALSO like 0_0

- he cute

- wait no fuck he's HOT

"short-circuit!"

- you manage to tear your eyes from peter Somehow and look over at tony, smiling like a madwoman as you jump into his arms and give him a hug

"short-circuit?"

- oh damn

- this kid's Voice!!!!!!!!!!

- adorable!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- you and tony pull apart and tony explains the nickname

"peter, this is y/n, my niece. short-circuit just so happens to come from when this idiotic girl will be talking about something when we're in the lab and she suddenly drifts off and gets this zoned out look on her face. she short-circuits, basically"

- peter's Still like 0_0

- his brain can't even Function Properly because tony was just explaining the next updates to peter's suit and then you're here and you're really pretty and tony apparently has a niece? and Everything Is Happening!!!!!!!!

"well im so sorry that i drift off because my brain is coming up with super cool stuff, which usually tends to make your little inventions even better. let's not forget me figuring out how to properly program JARVIS"

- *not peter's 0_0 look managing to amplify*

- eyebrows are RAISED

- (also quick moment of silence for jarvis i miss him 😔)

in memoriam:

graphic design is my passion 2.0

fyi graphic design is my passion is becoming a new ~segment~ on these hcs because i love making them and i deadass couldn't stop laughing at my last one

- okay back to Da Program

- all tony does is scoff, clapping you on the back

"anyways... peter's interning for me, so i was just explaining-"

- intern? i don't think so!

- time to be a stark and fuck things up!

- YEAHYEAH

"happy told me he was spider-man? the suit is literally on that table over there? unless he's doing both spider-man and an internship? which is honestly impressive, i mean-" you look over at peter, "with school and everything- unless you don't go to school, but still-"

- you look back over and tony and this man is.........

- he's got that Look on his face you know what i'm talking about

"dammit, now i gotta go yell at happy"

"oh shit was i not supposed to know?"

- tony gives you an exasperated look and you're like Oops!

"it would've been better if you didn't know. just don't go running that big mouth of yours"

- you give him an offended look before being like Okay Fine Whatever

- tony is just tired and peter's standing there like OH FUCK UH OKAY??????????

- aka that one scene in infinity war

moving on

"y/n, your room is set up. i'm gonna finish up here with pete and then we can go get cheeseburgers. deal?"

- you smile and nod, giving tony a kiss on the cheek (signature stark move)

- (i'm sad now)

- (fuck)

- you start to walk off and look over at peter

"it was nice meeting you, peter"

- mans is like Oh! Who? Me!

"oH- uh- y- yeah, it was nice meeting you, too"

- you give him a small smile and walk up the stairs out of the lab

- fucking dopey ass smile on your face because YOU JUST MET CUTE BOY SPIDERMAN AND HES CUTE AND HOT AND KJSDFHKSDJF FUCK!!!!!!!!!!

- peter looks back from watching you walk away and makes sure you're out of earshot

- fyi his ears are like Red Red and homeboy looks WHIPPED

- silly goose. fools fall in love

"i-um, i didn't know you had a niece?"

- tony just kind of scoffs

- very original reaction, tony! Never Been Done before, Especially by you! Wow!

"and i didn't realize how little time it takes for you to fall in love. i mean the bar was low but, jeez, kid"

"wait- no- i'm not in love"

"hmm okay. but if i catch you pulling something i will not hesitate to say i told you s-"

"no- yeah- that won't be, uh, that won't be a problem, mr stark"

- yeah tell that to your FACE peter

- he's like No! Of Course Not! meanwhile his face is just 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

- why are emojis so goddamn funny. they're the stupidest shits ever but i love them so much

- ANYWAYS!

- you go to your room and unpack and everything and yeahyeah whatever

- btw tony Knows you so when he first moved into the headquarters he immediately set aside a room for you with a view he knew you'd love and like all ur favorite things (posters, comfy bed and pillows and blankets, any instruments u like to play etc) because Uncle Tony is Bae Man

- then tony like sticks his head in and knocks on the doorframe

- ur like "hola!" (soy dora!)

- is that what she says? fuck idk i didn't take spanish and have the memory of a breadcrumb anyways!

"y/n i think you made my intern fall in love with you"

- bro Huh?????????/

- cute random slash ryn! Very Good At Typing!

"what on earth do you mean?"

- on the inside though ur like YEAHYEAH

- MOVING ON I'M GETTING A BIT DETAILED AND IT'S CONFUSING MY DICKHEAD OF A BRAIN

- you and tony get cheeseburgers yeahyeah okay

- so you have the whole week in nyc right

- guess what

- guess

- the fuck

- what

- can i just make my goddamn point already goodness gracious

- these hcs are literally me just writing down every single thought i have while writing these

- you guys do be living rent free in my brain 0_0

- OH MY GOD ANYWAYS

- you best BELIEVE peter is at headquarters

- every

- fucking

- day

- YEAHYEAH

- now the whole reason for that is

- when you got back from the Cheeseburger Extravaganza! tony called peter and was like

"sup bitch"

- i'm kidding

"kid listen my niece needs a friend and at this point maybe even a boyfriend. she hasn't managed to pull anyone yet and you'd be a nice fit ANYWAYS come over tomorrow and show her around new york"

- now, hearing this, peter cannot breathe

- internal monologue be like holyhdhdjhksjdbfhitshitskjfdbjfk

- basically me

- my thoughts

- ✨always✨

- the inner snape in me just came out SORRY

- I JUST MADE MY SCREEN SMALL WHAT THEFUDBS

- oh i fixed it

- okay so YEAH

- peter wakes up next morning and pays SO MUCH ATTENTION TO THE WAY HE LOOKS

- puts on his best science pun tee (i love him so much wtf) and makes sure his hair is just right

- aunt may is like o_0

- Hmm...... something Hinky is going on!

(once you get your bearings, find the carpet that covers the taillight, peel back the carpet, make a fist, punch the taillight out the back of the car, thus creating a hole in the back of the automobile, then stick your little hand out and wave to oncoming motorists to let them know that something hinky is going on!)

- bae man john mulaney

- i can't hear or even fucking THINK of the word hinky without thinking of detective jj bittenbinder STREETSMARTS

- shut up! you're all gonna dieSTREETSMARTS

- guys i'm starting to think i have ADHD

- oh my god okay BACK TO THE FUCKING STORY COME ON KAMRYN

- writing my full/actual name on here felt weird as fuck. dunno how often i'll be doing that okay anyways

- peter gets to headquarters and is immediately met by thor

"ah, the spider!"

0_0

"sir stark said something about you coming today to show madam y/n around the city!"

- thor gives peter the biggest pat on the back and peter Does Not Know How To Act

"uh, yeah, that's um.. that's what i'm doing"

- thor smiles (the smile he gives hulk in that one scene in ragnarok makes me LOSE MY MIND it's so FUNNY)

- can my cat stop rubbing her face on my laptop goddamn

- I MADE MY SCREEN SMALL AGAIN WTF

- okay reset ANYWAYS

- take a shot every time i say anyways

- hi i'm editing this imagine rn and according to ctrl+f i wrote "anyways" 20 times. time to get blackout drunk and chug a bottle of perfume everyone!

- Not Me with the john mulaney reference Again!

- thor's like "go get em kid"

- peters like "y-yeah thanks"

- gets in the elevator and he's still so flustered and confused and anxious

- his voice fucking CRACKS when he asks friday to take him to your floor

- why is it so cute when boys' voices crack wtf

- when he reaches ur door his heart is like WANNA SEE SUM REAL SPEED? 4.0

- he just knocks quietly and ur like "yeah?"

- ohgodohfuckohgodohfuckohgodohfuck

- peter opens the door and the LOOK ON HIS FACE

- he (⊙ˍ⊙)

- as soon as you see him you go into Fight Or Flight ur like (ง •_•)ง...?

- but u regain ur composure cause ur a stark 😎

"oh, hi peter!"

"hey, um,"

- he like slowly walks in

- mans is So Unsure of what he's allowed to do

- ur just like My Man it is OKAY

"mr. stark- your uncle-"

- yes peter i know hes my uncle

"so i said to her, 'we've been married for three and a half years.' and she knew that."

no i will not stop with the john mulaney quotes do not even try me (Do Not Fuck With Me)

"told me to show you around new york today"

- ur like O Shit Okay?

- you already know tony is tryna pull some SHIT because this is deadass like the idk..... at LEAST tenth time you've been to new york??????

- you tell peter you'll be ready in a few and he just cautiously sits on your bed cause he's so unsure of everything (babey)

- the two of you talk about the whole story about you and tony and stuff

"so yeah then he moved to new york and i've just been visiting him for a week once a year"

"wait"

- you look over, aggressively shoving on ur shoes and peter's just Thinking

"if you've been here before then why does mr. stark want me to show you around"

- you shrug

"he's weird like that"

- so ANYWAYS (take a shot!)

- ur ready n stuff so the two of you leave

- sam is being himself ofc so he starts clapping for the two of you and whooping as you walk past

- bucky starts clapping too but he doesn't know what he's clapping for so he's just looking around like o_0? 👏

- (he eventually sees the two of you though and smiles SO BRIGHT)

- sam's like

"I KNOW THE TWO OF YOU JUST MET BUT DAMN Y/N'S BEEN NEEDING A MAN!"

- you turn and almost beat the Fuck out of that bird-man ur like:

┗|｀O′|┛

- WHY IS THT SO FUNYNJFDN

we ┗|｀O′|┛┗|｀O′|┛┗|｀O′|┛┗|｀O′|┛┗|｀O′|┛

WHAT THE FUCKDBGKDJFGNSKDJFNHEHAHHFSBJDFA

┗|｀O′|┛I'M WALKIN HERE!

- oh my god ANYWAYS (TAKE A SHOT)

- tony just chillin in the back with a smug look on his face

- so you guys just start walking through the streets and peter just points out random things

"this is where an old lady gave me a churro"

"right up there is where i did a flip for this guy at a hot dog cart"

"i hung a bike robber right here- oh shoot well like i didn't hang him but i like suspended him in the air.. with my web.... if you, uh, know what i'm sayingi'mgonnastoptalkingnow"

- ur like bitch if you keep acting like this (aka like yourself) imma start Acting Up

- it's Too Cute

- the two of you take the subway to get to queens so he can show you around His Area Of New York

- which is a whole experience cause it's

- the fucking

- subway

- in new york

- you see a subway rat and you get SO EXCITED

- the fucking brightest smile is on your face and peter just looks at you in awe because it's a fucking rat but for some reason you got so happy over it???????

- the subway car was PACKED AS HELL (aka peter. we all know it)

- (there's NO WAY peter's dick is small moving on)

- so the two of you are forced to hold onto the pole things

- and since cali doesn't have subways and subway poles are not something you generally see

- does it? i've never fucking been there i shouldn't be spitting facts that probably aren't actually facts

- for the sake of this imagine california does not have subways

😌

- you decide to Pull a Move and fucking wrap your leg around it, laughing as you spin slightly

- very ungracefully might i add

- we're talking about y/n. the Clumsy Messy Hair Bitch from every goddamn book on this app

- can we talk about how y/n is a whole ass character. like ask anyone who reads fanfic to describe y/n and they Would Not describe themselves DESPITE THE FACT THAT Y/N LITERALLY MEANS "YOUR NAME"

- anyways (two shots of vodka *glug glug*)

- peter gets slightly flustered at your stripper move but covers it up with a laugh

- something about The Way peter's holding onto the pole above ur head is VERY ATTRACTIVE

- now is the time to go look back at the gif i used for this imagine

"what's a camera like you doing in a place like this?"

- fuck you tom for being cute shut up

- the car stumbles and

- CLICHE MOMENT ALERT y'all know what's going on

- you stumble slightly and peter (speedy spidey reflexes) quickly grabs you by the waist to steady you

- AWKWARD MOMENT

- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

"thanks"

"oh- yeah, uh, no problem"

- he like... awkwardly pulls his hand away from your waist and suddenly his hand feels like a fucking lead balloon with No Purpose so he just stuffs it in his pocket because Pockets!

- you lowkey wish he'd kept his hand on your waist OOPS

- we desperate for human contact 😔

- the two of y'all get off the subway at his stop and as soon as you step out into the like Actual Street or Whatever you're like 😀 cause it's so PRETTY and it's peter's home so it's even more exciting

- you get lunch at delmar's (ofc)

- mr delmar kept making suggestive eyes between the two of you so you were like o_0

- but it was SO CUTE BECAUSE PETER AND MR DELMAR JUST HAD SUCH A CUTE RELATIONSHIP TOGETHER

- AND FUCKING MR DELMAR HAD THE BALLS TO GO

"supongo que ya no preguntarás por mi hija, eh?"

- WHICH

- IF YOU DON'T SPEAK SPANISH CAUSE I SURE AS HELL DON'T

- thank u google translate for the assistance😌

- TRANSLATES TO "guess you won't be asking about my daughter anymore, huh?"

como estas tu hija eh?

that'll be ten dollars

IT'S FIVE DOLLARS

- anyways (shots! shots! shots shots shots shots! shots!)

- ur like Bro Huh and peter's like NOTHING

- and fucking 🅱ETER

- this BITCH

- ALSO HAD THE BALLS TO FUCKING REPLY IN SPANISH

"ella es la hija del señor stark" (she's mr. stark's daughter)

- ngl you couldn't breathe for a second

- cause who The Fuck can when 🅱eter 🅱ucking 🅱arker speaks ESPAÑOL

- ????????????? WHO

- moving on (not saying a****** to give you a break from the shots you're welcome)

- you get your sandwiches and they fucking SLAP

- peter smiles SO HARD WHEN HE SEES YOUR REACTION CAUSE HE'S SO EXCITED THAT YOU LIKE HIS FAVORITE SANDWICH (not you saying "i'll have what he has" just because you were too busy thinking about him speaking spanish oops)

- the two of you share a bag of gummy worms

- overall 11/10 experience

- i got a bit carried away with that and we're running on over 3000 (rip) words here so i'm gonna hurry this up goodness fuck

- editing ryn here to say HAHA 3000 words little did i Fucking Know

- the two of you get back to headquarters and peter DROPS YOU OFF AT YOUR ROOM LIKE THE GENTLEMAN HE IS AND IT'S KINDA AWKWARD BECAUSE HOW ON EARTH WOULDN'T IT BE BUT HE'S SO CUTE SO IT'S OKAY

- ngl you lay on your bed for a second like "wait was that a date?"

- peter legit just walks to the end of the hallway before closing his eyes and leaning back against the wall, letting out a sigh

- he's like holy shit i need to stop getting so whipped over girls within less than 24 hours

- then fucking sir STANK rounds the corner

"hey, pete! how was showing short-circuit around?"

"oh, hi, uh, it was good"

- this boy is fucking Flustered As Hell

"good? good. what'd y'all do?"

"we, just, um, walked around and i showed her around queens, too"

- tony just looks at him for a second and is like damn this kid needs a break i'll lay off of him

- so like the Cool Guy he is he like awkwardly pats peter on the shoulder and walks over to your room

- u and tones have a convo about your day and you end up gushing about it a little bit OOPS

- tony is so proud of himself him and his egotistical ass Goodness

- a n y w a y s  ( t a k e  a  s h o t ! )

- peter ends up coming over everyday because It's Summer! and he has No Life!

- just thought i'd let you know that i have spent the last couple days binge watching bestdressed's videos and now everything i write down is being narrated by ashley

- actually fuck that everything i THINK is narrated by ashley

- also can we gush about her in the comments like she seems like the coolest person ever and like the big sister i never had and she's so open about her life and funny and quirky but in a good way and i just have So Much Respect For Her!!!!!!!!!!!

- and i want her apartment SO BAD I'M LITERALLY OBSESSED WITH IT

- THE FUCKING FIRE ESCAPE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

- not me having a weird obsession with fire escapes ever since reading/writing peter parker fics which tend to involve them in some way or another

- SO YEAH peter's hanging around a lot

- at first it's a bit weird cause you're like..... You Don't Live Here.....??????????? but At This Point You Almost Do????????????????

- AIN'T NO COMPLAINTS THOUGH

- the two of you break the ice pretty quick

- the night of the day after peter showed you around (did that make any sense at all probably not) you were just chilling in your room watching uhhhhhhhhhhhhh

- let me think rq

- um okay uhhhhhh (bonus points to you if you read that in peter's voice)

- OKAY SO YOU'RE WATCHING LADY BIRD (bomb movie)

- fun fact time! i like saying "what you do is very baller" at random times because idk why but that line makes me laugh SO HARD

- timothee's character in general was just..... so............

- ????????????

- yeah so you're watching lady bird and peter passes your doorway cause he was "going on a walk"

- headass

- you see him and ur like o_0

"peter?"

- bitch fucking TRIPS

- oh u got me trippinnnnn oh stumblinnnnn oh flippinnnnnnn oh fumblinnnn oh

- clumsy cause i'm falling in ~love~

- are those the right lyrics? eh whatever

- CANADA EH

ah the serotonin.. okay MOVING ON

"y-yeah? oH hi y/n didntuhhhhhhh didn't see you there"

- he's casually scratching the back of his neck because he's nervy

"yeah, i'm, um..."

- YOU'RE NERVY TOO

- composure equals regained though bc stark. yeah!

- my thoughts are........ incoherent

"i'm watching lady bird, uh, if you wanna join"

- WATCH A MOVIE?

- WITH YOU?????????????????

- hells yeah!

"o-oh, yeah, sure"

- mans awkwardly waddles in and sits at the edge of your bed

"you can like... lay down, peter. i don't bite"

- he just awkwardly lays down and his side lightly presses against yours

- you have to shut your eyes for a second because MAN does unexpected contact from a boy have such a big effect on you

- not even kidding one of my guy friends patted me on the head as he walked past my desk and i DEADASS GOT BUTTERFLIES I WAS SO ASHAMED

- LIKE WHAT THE FUCK WHO ALLOWED THAT ???????????????

- so anyways (🥂)

- why isn't there a shot glass emoji this is discrimination (i'm kidding)

- the movie was great like

- you and peter would just laugh at random parts and eventually just started critiquing every little moment

- it ended up as a very great moment very nice very cool

- we like furthering our relationships with cute boys :D

- those of you who have been following the story (on my message board) abt the boy i'm talking to aka furthering my relationship with... yeahyeah!

- essentially you and peter start hanging out every day

- the Chemistry you have is Unmatched

- like you just clicked really well

- mainly y'all just watch tv in the commons

- you binge watch i'm not okay with this even though you've already seen it

- peter's like "so why do you like this show so much?"

- ur like 0_0 ... "the plot"

THE PLOT IN QUESTION: stanley barber

- who happens to give me peter parker vibes a little bit

- food network turns on and it takes you like five minutes tops to migrate to the kitchen

- the brownies y'all made did not turn out well

- bucky took a bite, made a face, then smirked

"you two put weed in here?"

- no, bitch, we just suck at baking

- lots of late night convos ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

- BIG ICEBREAKERS THERE

"wait so like... how big do you expect our dicks to be"

"peter what the fuck"

"i'm curious!"

- if you haven't had one of those convos with someone of the opposite gender... You Haven't Lived

- also why do guys like talking about their dicks so much???? the amount of comments they make about them during those convos.. meanwhile i'm just trying to figure out their personality 😔

- the two of you even spend time in the lab together

- this is when he sees ~short-circuit~ in action

- y'all are doing some dumbass experiment idk

- OOH IDEA

- so y'all are making ✨something✨ for an upgrade on peter's suit

- my idea was only half developed don't make fun of me

- and you make a Stunning Realization and fucking SPIN around in your chair to face peter

- ur just rambling making science-y smart connections and peters like holy shit she's a fucking genius of course she is how on earth did she just

- and then as you get further into your discovery you suddenly just cut off and stare into the distance with this Super Serious Look on your face

- THE WAY THAT AS I WROTE "SUPER" 1D WENT "I CAN'T BE NO SUPERMAN"

(but for you i'll be superhuman!)

- then you just SPIN AROUND in your chair and start working on the suit again

- peter's just like 0_0 for a moment

"huh, okay"

- it takes you a few seconds to realize he even said anything but then you look up and ur like 0_0 (we're gonna have to start taking a shot every time i use that face goodness fuck)

"what?"

"you short-circuited!"

- he's all giddy and smiley about it too cause he FINALLY UNDERSTANDS

"shut up, parker"

- peter Totally has a thing for being called parker i just know it

- MY CAT JUST JUMPED UP AND CLAWED ME

- greedy bitch

- AS I WAS SAYING...

- once you get in the ~thing~ that you designed for the suit

- okay i really need to think of an actual upgrade give me a min

- OKAY SO YOU MADE A VOICE CHANGER

- wow very cool, me! innovation that Excites!

- we're just gonna ignore the fact that the interrogation protocol has a voice changer got it? yeahyeah

- peter's like No Way when you tell him you finished it

- you slip on the mask and tell karen to activate the Grown Man Protocol (not peter being offended by the name)

- you start talking and immediately BUST OUT LAUGHING because you sound like Siri

- and since you're Hella Genius you made it so you could change the voices just like how siri is

- so suddenly you're a BRITISH MAN

- you and peter can't stop laughing

- you give it to peter and then you're like

"wait no try it on with the suit too"

- peter's like o_0?

"for effect!"

- walter beckett?

- TOM?

- okay whatever

- peter's like

"okay um i'm just gonna uh... change over here"

- you nod and turn around

- just the sound of his clothes hitting the ground itself gives you butterflies

- and then you realize

- you can deadass See Him Through The Reflection Of The Microscope

- is that even possible? for the sake of this imagine Yes

- your face gets SO HOT

- it's a very small reflective area thing so not a lot of detail but ENOUGH TO SHOW HIS TONED SEXY ASS PHYSIQUE

- fucking crush me peter please i beg it would be an honor

"i want you to do it so i can stomp you with my hooves, i'm so fucking crazy"

- (crazy for you, peter!)

"okay it's on"

- you practically BLAST around in your seat because the VOICE IS WORKING AND IT'S STILL BRITISH

- peter your tom is showing

- ngl though you couldn't stop thinking about how peter looked through the reflection and you didn't even want to THINK about how he would look-

...

- you know

- in all actuality you did want to think about it like think about it for literally the rest of your life if you could but we're gonna ignore that

- nonetheless the experience was Muy Bueno Very Fun and you and peter spent a solid hour just messing with the voices

- ALSO!!!!!!!!!! another plotline: WHEN PETER'S AT HEADQUARTERS FOR A LEGITIMATE REASON

- that reason being training

- let me just say

- even though he only trained twice during ur visit

- you fucking CHERISHED those moments

- because when peter told you the night before his training session that he would be training in the morning you were like Hmm...... I Need To See This

- so you deadass "take a walk" (Very Peter Of You) by the training room

- and ur met with the sight of this:

i hate him so fucking much

who the FUCK ALLOWED THIS i can't breathe

- you definitely take out your phone to snap a few pics DON'T EVEN LIE TO ME YOU WOULD

- ur camera is on live mode too 😌

- then you run away before you get caught but DAMN

- when you go back to your room you just Inspect those pics like a crazy person and keep replaying the live

- then u look at the time

"friday, when does peter's training end?"

"peter parker's training is scheduled to finish in two minutes"

- TWO MINUTES?

- SAY LESS!

- you check yourself in the mirror before ZOOMING downstairs and distracting yourself in the kitchen

- silently thanking the gods (thor?) that no one was in the kitchen when you got there

- (hi i'm getting carried away with this mini plot so just like don't mind it)

- (carried away as in i really really did get carried away LOL)

- you're like what the fuck i can't just Stand Here in the Middle of the Kitchen so you grab some strawberries from the refrigerator and start cutting them up (they just Taste Better that way don't fight me) for a "snack"

THE SNACK IN QUESTION: peter

- yeah ❤

- just as you pop one into your mouth peter walks in to get a glass of water

- now let me just set the scene:

you: mouth in a weird 'o' shape as your mouth forgets how to chew because fucking peter just walked in peter: curly hair a sweaty mess, skin glistening with sweat, wearing black shorts and a gray tank top which Just Fucking Ends You, his usual adorable baby face, oh and he's also panting cause he's fucking exhausted and now you're also out of breath because damn that is Hot strawberries: chopped

"oh, hi y/n"

- the fucking PANTING

- why is breathing heavy so hot?

- i think we all know

"hey, peter"

- shoutout to your stark genes for giving you fake confidence whenever you need it

"want any strawberries?"

- he fucking chugs half of his water just Right In Front Of You

the jawline i hate him so much can he shut up right now like genuinely please shut the fuck up goodness fucking gracious tom

jk please step on me

- he swallows and has Finally Caught his Breath

"oh, yeah, thank you"

- he just walks over to you

- as if he doesn't look the way he does

- and just grabs a strawberry and pops it into his mouth

- nonchalantly or whatever

- you pray to THOR he can't hear your heart as it fucking SLAMS AGAINST YOUR STERNUM

- it's beating so fast it's like LET ME OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- he hums

"strawberries taste so much better after training"

- you know what would taste better after training?

- lol

"thank you for the snack, i'm gonna go shower now"

- he elbows you and smiles lightly

- you almost can't speak because it's all Far Too Much for you to handle rn

"no problem, peter"

- as if you weren't having a heart attack okay

- i really got caught up in that but WHATEVER

- ladies and gents we are running on over 5k words at this point holy shit

- SO I'M GONNA START WRAPPING THIS UP A LITTLE

- basically you and peter become good friends by the end of your trip

- and then

- the dreaded

😔

- time to leave, bros

- the night before is kinda weird cause you and peter are just hanging out on the roof of headquarters because why not

"leaving new york usually doesn't feel as weird as this"

- peter looks over at you

- btw at this point 🅱eter is Beyond Whipped so he's fucking SAD that you're going home

"what do you mean?"

- the two of you share a look and it's very sad because you both know that you've become really good friends and both want a bit more

- part of you considers being a baddie and just trying to like at LEAST kiss him tonight (maybe more wink wink) so you could at least have that before you go but you chicken out

- the two of you say goodbye that night because your flight is at the Crack of Dawn

- he awkwardly pulls you in for a hug and suddenly you deeply consider locking yourself in your room so nobody can make you leave

- and then you remember vision can fucking Hover through walls and you're like Well Damn!

- you hug him tightly (a bit too tight yeah maybe)

- when you pull apart this Bitch literally goes

"well it was nice meeting you"

- you CAN'T FUCKING HOLD IT IN AND JUST MAKE THE MOST OBSCENE LAUGHING NOISE

"peter we spent a week together and you're acting like we had a 5 minute encounter"

"i don't know how to act!"

- me neither, peter. me neither

- so you leave in the morning and you're fucking UPSET

- tony is in the car with you and happy and he WONT STOP TALKING ABOUT YOU AND PETER BECAUSE YOU SPENT AT LEAST HALF OF YOUR TIME WITH HIM

- YOU'RE LIKE SHUT UP I'M GOING THROUGH A HEARTBREAK OVER A BOY I'VE KNOWN FOR SEVEN DAYS

- aren't we all

- your goodbye to tony is sad but like Not Even As Sad as your goodbye with peter which is KINDA MESSED UP BUT

- the heart wants what it wants

- and just when you get on the plane

- is when you realize

- you and peter didn't get each other's numbers

...

- Wtf 💔

- so THE WHOLE PLANE RIDE IS SAD

- YOU LISTEN TO MUSIC AND DRAMATICALLY LOOK OUT THE WINDOW LIKE UR IN A SAD MUSIC VIDEO FOR HALF THE FLIGHT

- YOU ALSO REWATCH LADY BIRD :,(((((((((((((((((((((((( in remembrance of the good old times

- when you get home you're like kinda happy to be home but you miss new york and tony and peter and everyone So Much

- even ur mom notices she's like 🤨 Hmm... this Ain't The Usual!

- so this is where the request ended off but i'm adding to it because i do Not want to leave this on an angsty note

- I'M ABOUT TO HIT 6K WORDS BUT IT'S FINE

- LET'S CRANK THIS OUT WOOT WOOT

- so peter just so happens to wake up that morning and SIT UP VERY QUICKLY AS IT HITS HIM

- (ur like on ur flight probably zooming over the Goddamn Midwest)

- he has the same realization that you did

"may!"

- the woman RUNS in she's like WHATISEVERYTHINGOKAYAREYOUOKAY

"i just realized i didn't get y/n's number"

- woman melts she's like i thought you were fucking DYING goddamn spider bitch boy

- but then she melts even more because she didn't even need peter to tell her how Whipped he is

"awh, i'm sorry hon"

- next time peter goes to headquarters he talks to tony and the mans just like This Is Your Fault!

- but then nat pops in

"peter, you do realize you could probably find her on social media, right"

- moment of silence for you and peter's stupidity because somehow Neither Of You Thought Of That???????????

- rip

- as soon as he leaves from training (looking Sexy As Hell) he searches your name on instagram

- "y/n stark"

- and nothing shows up

- because you never told him your actual last name because IT NEVER CAME UP

- he just assumed it was stark cause why wouldn't he

- SO HE'S LIKE :,)

- until his next time at headquarters

"mr. stark i couldn't find her on instagram"

- tony's like i really got this kid hooked huh

"pretty sure she has one, pete"

"well i looked her up! y/n stark. nothing"

- then tony's like oHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

"kid, her last name's l/n."

- peter just sits there like 0_0 for a second before it all ties together in his head and makes sense

"oh my god"

- SO HE GETS YOUR INSTAGRAM

- he definitely looks through all his posts and deletes a few embarrassing ones before requesting to follow you

INSTAGRAM peterbparker has requested to follow you.

- you SHOOT UP IN YOUR BED

- NOBODY MOVE

- you do the same thing peter did and look through all your posts and delete a few before accepting his request

- and then you request back and he immediately accepts it

- commence the hour of stalking!

- the two of you just fucking Investigate each others' accounts before peter's like O Shit! i should Probably message her!

peterbparker: Right after you left I realized I forgot to get your number

- kinda awkward but your heart is RACING you're like AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

- the two of you begin talking and get each other's numbers and snapchats and whatever

- over time the two of you get really close over the internet like

- you become the first ones you go to when you see a dog or get food at a cool place or see a funny meme/tiktok or just like have a problem in general or want to talk

- and ofc you gush about him to your friends and they're like

- Girl... u really fell for a New York Boy Huh

- after a few months you finally muster up the courage to facetime him

- you almost Collapse once his face shows up because guess the fuck what

- he just finished training

- mua ha haaaa

"hello!"

- he says it all goofy like hi hello we're facetiming now holy shit oh FUCK we're FACETIMING!!!!!!?????!?!?!?!?

- i luv him

- the two of you talk for a bit and you fan yourself off-screen because the sight of him Genuinely made you light on fire and plus you were just nervous in general

- he even runs around the entire fucking building to find everyone so you can say hi cause he's babey

- the team DEFINITELY yells stuff like "lovebirds!" and "date already!" in the background and peter's face just gets So Red

- he finds tony and deadass goes

"mr. stark! it's your niece!"

- tony's like No Shit!

- overall amazing 100/10 time facetiming

- so the two of you start facetiming practically every day even though it's not summer anymore and you're back in school and have hella busy lives (peter's literally a superhero?)

- you'll facetime while doing homework and he'll help you with physics (even though you don't really need the help you pretend you do anyways) and it's so cute when he does because he Loves physics so much so he gets really excited and into it

- sometimes you'll fall asleep while on ft and he'll take screenshots

- ngl he set his favorite one as his lockscreen because he loved it so much and ned and mj definitely saw it and were lowkey like 🥺🥺 cause they ship you two so hard

- and when he'd fall asleep on ft you'd take screenshots too and look at them every time you missed him

- NOW THE EXCITING PART

- so it's winter now

- the Horrible Disgusting period between thanksgiving and christmas break

- because of finals the two of you facetime a bit less so it's kinda sad

- BUT THEN

- right when you get out of school for christmas break you're about to call peter so the two of you can celebrate (not peter checking the time every few minutes after he got out of school because he's a couple hours ahead)

- somebody's got a surprise

- you get a call from peter right when you get into your car and you're like Perfect Timing Hell Yeah

- you answer it and are met with the sight of him and tony smiling at the camera

*immediately screenshots it*

"oh, hi tony!"

"we have a surprise"

- peter's like bouncing from excitement and tony gives him a look before starting to talk

"we're fl-"

"WE'RE FLYING YOU TO NEW YORK FOR CHRISTMAS!"

- peter interrupts and tony looks so defeated but YOU BARELY EVEN NOTICE BECAUSE YOU'RE SO EXCITED

- tony explains everything cause he worked it out with your parents (y'all are just gonna celebrate early)

- (tony doesn't say this but deadass the reason ur parents even let you is because they know how much you wanna go back mainly to see peter)

- eventually tony leaves the two of you alone to talk and you're just in your car in the school parking lot practically yelling at your phone as you and peter talk about how excited you are

"and you can finally meet may-"

"may!"

"yes, may! and we can go back to delmar's and see murph-"

"murph!"

- peter can't stop smiling cause you're so excited and you look so cute cause you're Trying Your Best to get out of the parking lot while maintaining excitement

"can we go see times sq- MOTHERFUCKER GET OUT OF THE WAY JESUS CHRI- sorry peter i didn't mean to explode"

- if anything that made you even cuter in his eyes

- you and peter facetime while you pack and neither of you can handle your excitement AT ALL

- the night before you leave you're both in your beds across the country just talking quietly to each other over the phone and it's like the quiet cute excitement because you're seeing each other in less than 24 hours and you're both so so whipped by each other and just Cannot Wait

- it's really late ESPECIALLY for peter since he's ahead of you but he doesn't care at ALL

- so y'all are just whispering to each other

"i'm so excited, pete"

"i know, me too"

"i'm not gonna know how to act"

"me neither. you're not allowed to make fun of how awkward i am, okay?"

"peter, you being awkward is cute"

- the two of you can barely sleep from excitement but you fall asleep (on ft ofc) with smiles on your faces

- as soon as you wake up you text peter and you're like GO GO GO (spinch🥬spinch🥬spinch🥬)

- you call him one last time while you're waiting at the gate

"i think i'm gonna pee myself"

"well if you do at least clean yourself up before i get there"

- his LAUGH

- the boyish laugh that FUcking Ends Me

"i'm still so amazed at how i managed to convince mr. stark to let me pick you up"

- you can't stop smiling especially at the thought of peter DRIVING (hot as FUCK)

"you'd better be a good driver, peter"

"it's fine, the car has autopilot so we won't die"

"glad to hear it, pete- oh sHIT my plane's boarding"

- peter FREAKS OUT

"have a safe and amazing flight and text me when you land, okay?"

"i will peter, thank you. see you in new york"

"see you in new york"

- y'all say that in the most Giddy Way (literally how could you not)

- you're bouncing in your seat the whole flight and the dude next to you is like o_0

- the SECOND you land you text peter

y/n: IM HERE IM HERE WE JUST LANDED ILL BE OFF THE PLANE IN A FEW MINUTES

- peter's sitting in this Far Too Expensive Car and he's just bouncing in his seat cause he has so much pent up energy

- he gets the text and that's when it really settles in

- he starts freaking out a little and like constantly checks himself in the rearview mirror and starts playing the playlist the two of you made together (puppy eyes) and makes sure he smells good

- then he sees you walk out out of the airport looking really excited and tired and confused

- mans JUMPS OUT OF THE CAR

"y/n!"

- you see him and ur literally smiling SO HARD

- you run at him, suitcase flopping around and backpack nearly falling off of your shoulders

- but you look so cute and peter can't handle it especially when the two of you finally make contact and your arms wrap around him

- he squeezes you so tight and even lifts you off the ground cause he's Strong and Excited

- that sounded a bit sexual OOPS

- you can't even process the fact that you're finally back in peter's arms after half a year and now you're literally so much closer than you were when you left new york last summer

- when you pull apart you can't stop looking at each other and just smiling giddily

- your arms are still like holding onto each other

- what finally breaks you is a fucking Ungodly gust of wind and you're like

"holy shit winter here is a lot colder than cali"

"oH, right, uh we have blankets in the car"

- the two of you just take another few seconds to look at each other until it gets a bit awkward and you clear your throats

"i can take your bag?"

"yeah, thanks"

- you watch his muscles flex as he lifts your suitcase into the back and you're like i hate this man

- this GENTLEMAN even RUNS OVER TO YOUR SIDE AND OPENS YOUR DOOR FOR YOU BEFORE YOU GET THE CHANCE

- you MELT

- when you sit down he closes the door for you and you're hit with the sound of your shared playlist and the car smells like peter's scent and it's AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

- when he gets into the driver seat (which was very attractive to watch) you're just staring at him excitedly

"you put on our playlist!"

"why wouldn't i?"

- he smiles at you before reaching back and getting the blankets for you, also turning on your seat heater to make sure you're comfy

- mans just watches you as you shift around, buckling in and getting your backpack situated at your feet

- by the time you're all ready and stuff you look over and he's just looking at you

"pete-"

"would it be too soon for me to kiss you?"

- AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

- it takes you a second to process but you're like OH MY GODKFSDKNFSK

"yeah, peter, it would"

- your serious tone RUINS PETER

- HE'S LIKE OH MY GOD WHY DID I ASK THAT WHY DO I EXIST

- until you laugh and wrap a hand around the back of his neck, pulling him to you and planting your lips on his

- (AAAAAAAAAAHDKSJDFHSKJDFBKSDJGNSDKJFNADSJKABBJFS)

- bonus: the two of you are just singing in the car and (peter looks so hot when he's driving anyways) peter suddenly goes silent and you're like "what" and he just glances at you before going "is it bad that i really want to pull over so i can kiss you again?"

- double bonus: he pulls over and y'all makeout LOL

+ + +

holy FUCK i got so so carried away but i really like this one soooooo

OKAY HERE'S MY LITTLE THANK YOU NOTE IN HONOR OF THE 50TH IMAGINE AAAAAAAAAA: you GUYS. when i started this book it was literally just me being like "i'm in love with this fictional boy and need an outlet and have FAR too many ideas," which is really how every fanfic writer starts tbh. but oh my god, i never expected to get so much love and support and just such an amazing experience from this. there are people all over the world that read my chaotic fluffy shit, that are actually touched by my work and it legitimately blows my mind. 180k reads in almost a year? like 250 followers? INSANE. i've made so many friends on here that i can come to when i have no one in my real life to talk to and every time i reach out, you guys are here for me and so incredibly supportive and helpful and amazing. i love each and every comment you guys post on my works. they make me laugh so hard and are so beyond sweet and make my heart melt. some of them blow my mind cause you guys will be like "omg hi you responded oh my god i love your work" and like hype me so much and i'm like BRUH!!!! i'm literally just a stressed out, anxiety ridden teenage girl in love with peter parker lol and the fact that you guys support me so much and love my work just truly makes me so happy. i love writing and i love that my writing has reached other people, even if it's literally just silly fanfiction. I APPRECIATE AND LOVE YOU GUYS WITH EVERYTHING IN ME AND EVEN IF I DON'T REPLY TO YOUR COMMENT I SEE IT AND YOU GUYS MAKE ME SMILE AND AAAAAAAAAAAKJSDFNKJDF <33333333333333

okay now i have 5 more requests to write HAHA but i hope u guys are having an amazing day/night/whatever and that ur drinking enough water and eating enough and staying happy and healthy <3 MWAH!

[bab-ybird]

Friday Nights with Defsoul

Pairing: Jaebeom x Reader

Genre: College!au, Best friend!Jaebeom, best friends to lovers, fluff, fluff, and more fluff

Word Count: 8,245 words

[ ft. GOT7 and some DAY6 members ]

A/N Yes, I am aware that I misspelled Jaebeom’s name here, but I wrote this before he clarified the spelling, so until I find time to edit this, you’re just going to have to sit through jAebUm lmao oops; thanks for reading tho! mwah

~

It's been a while since Jaebum last attended a party. Not because he was busy- even though he was- but because he just didn't feel like it. After all, parties were only fun when he was in the mood to get wasted and spend the night dancing with his best friends, so he didn't see the point of attending one when he felt like doing something else more productive.

Like hosting his radio segment. He'd only decided to join the campus' radio station as a DJ in the October of the previous academic year. It was in his third year of college that he composed a significant amount of songs and gained enough experience to be confident enough to share them with the world that was his university. Finally giving into Park Sungjin’s, his senior, antics about becoming a part of the crew, Jaebum now appeared on the station every Friday night to share his music in a segment he (lamely) liked to call "Friday Nights with Defsoul". Now, he was in his second year of hosting the segment, and his fourth year of college, set to graduate at the end of March- if he managed to not screw anything up.

Despite not being in the mood to party, Jaebum couldn't say no to his friend Jackson's invitation- not when Jackson was using this party as an excuse to finally relax from his hectic life. It was rare that Jackson was willing to let loose for the night (he was always so busy with his extra-curricular activities), and since Jaebum figured that his friend needed all his support during this tough time in his life, he agreed to be present. So here he was, half-heartedly sipping at a drink that his over-enthusiastic friend, Park Jaehyung, had given him, standing at the kitchen counter, and snacking on a bowl of chips that he had poured for himself.

"Jaebum! My man!"

Ah. The sweet sound of a dongsaeng forgetting to call me hyung.

Hong Kong native and fellow performance group member Jackson Wang carelessly calls out his hyung's name as he bounds through the kitchen door with a red cup in his hands. "I've been looking all over for you!"

"Have you really?" Jaebum asks sarcastically. "You seemed so eager to leave me alone, by myself, when you went to go mingle with your Chinese friends."

Failing to notice that Jackson didn't come up to him alone, Jaebum almost misses the small chuckle that comes from Jackson's friend. A girl with a lean frame, pale skin, long black hair, and the warmest brown eyes Jaebum had ever seen watches their exchange silently. You stand behind Jackson, watching amusedly as he playfully hit his hyung's arm. "Aish, hyung, don't be like that. They're Chinese, like me. They remind me of home."

Jaebum nods understandingly, patting his friend on the back. "Okay, okay, I get it. Go have fun- "

"EY, LUCAS! Glad you could make it, man!"

And just like that, Jackson forgets about his friends and leaves the kitchen to go mingle with a handful of people who look too young to be at a college party.

"Don't they look a little too young to be here?" Jaebum comments, eyeing the new arrivals and starting a conversation with the girl that Jackson had left him with to entertain.

You seem to know who he's talking about and nod. "Yeah, they are. They're just in high school."

Jaebum's eyes nearly pop out of his head. "Eh?! And Jackson invited them here? How does he even know them?"

Amused at his reaction, you smile. "They met at a summer camp a couple of months ago. You know what he's like, it's so easy for him to get homesick. I'm happy he's able to make so many friends that let him feel like he's at home, even if just for a little while."

Jaebum watches the kitchen door warily, largely aware of the trouble that the underaged teens could get into if they were caught drinking. Sensing his discomfort, you speak up again. "I wouldn't worry too much about them. I made Jackson swear that he would take care of them tonight. No alcohol, no drugs, no funny business whatsoever."

These words unexpectedly give him comfort, despite the fact that they come from a complete stranger. "Thanks." He says. "That makes me feel better."

You nod, but don’t say anything back as you reach into the fridge and grab one of the many smoothie bottles that Jackson liked to stock up on.

"You seem to be really close to him. How come I've never heard of you before?" Jaebum asks.

Swallowing the sip you had just taken, you sit on a counter stool as you answer. "Jackson and I go back. Summer before freshman year, I think? We met at summer camp."

Raising an eyebrow, Jaebum tilts his head, confused. "Oh, so you're-?"

"Chinese?" You chuckle. "No. I'm Spanish-Korean, actually."

Jaebum's head tilts in confusion. "Spanish-Korean? But then why would you go to one of Jackson's Chinese summer camps?"

"I speak Chinese. At least, now I do. Back then, I wanted to get a better grasp of the language before heading off to college, so I decided to attend a Chinese summer camp." You tell him, taking another sip.

"So how many languages do you speak? Or is it just Spanish, Chinese, and Korean?" Jaebum can't stop himself from asking.

You shake your head, smiling proudly. "I'm also fluent in English, Russian, Japanese, and French."

"Wow." Jaebum's voice comes out filled with awe. "That's amazing. It really is, I've never met someone fluent in so many languages. You could conquer the world, probably."

Chuckling softly, you brush the hair out of your face. "Thanks. I'm flattered."

"If you don't mind me asking, why so many?" Once again, Jaebum can't keep his nose out of your business.

"Oh, I want to be a translator or a travel guide." You tell him honestly. "I love travelling, and the only thing I'm good at is talking to people, so I figured I'd make a career out of it."

"That sounds fun." Jaebum comments. "So, your major is-?"

"Majoring in Linguistics, minoring in World History." You answer. "What about you?"

The conversation is suddenly about him, and he thinks it’s such a shame because he could spend all night learning the tiniest details about this very interesting girl.

"Major in Film, minor in Music Theory." He says.

"Oh, you're into music?" You ask. "Do you compose?"

Jaebum nods at this, takes a sip of his drink, and gestures for you to share his bowl of chips.

"Are you, perhaps, on the campus radio?" You raise an eyebrow.

Jaebum is shocked. Unless he told them directly, no one ever even guessed that he was a DJ for the campus' radio station. "How did you know?"

You snap your fingers, looking at him with a triumphant look in your eyes. "I knew your voice sounded familiar! You're Defsoul, aren't you? The DJ that comes on every Friday night?"

Oh, my god. For the first time in his life, Jaebum is speechless. How did this girl, who didn't even know him before this, figure that out faster than any of his actual friends?

"Um- I, uh- "

Taking a sip from your drink, you continue. "I love your segment. I've been listening to it ever since you started."

Wow. "Thank you. That means so much to me, really." Jaebum finally finds his words.

"Although..." You hesitate, and this makes Jaebum even more curious.

"What is it?" He pries.

"Well," You pause. "Have you ever considered, um...calling it by a different name?"

...excuse me? "Come again?"

"Don't misunderstand me, please!" You hurriedly apologize. "Not to be rude, or anything, it's just...your segment name is sort of..."

Jaebum senses that you’re having difficulty putting it nicely, so he offers words of his own. "Lame? Boring? Cliché?"

You nod, relieved that you don't have to say it yourself. "Exactly."

Jaebum gives you an expression of distaste. "I happen to like calling it that, thank you very much. My friends think it's a good name too!"

"I'm not saying that they don't! It's just that you could have a name that's catchier, more unique, more memorable- so maybe one with not too many syllables in it- "

"Okay, okay, stop. I get it." Despite himself, Jaebum finds himself laughing, thoroughly amused by this girl and her personality. "I still don't know your name."

"I’m Y/N." You tell him.

Jaebum offers his hand for you to shake. "Im Jaebum."

"Finally." You say, firmly gripping onto his hand as you shake it. "A name and face behind the lamest radio segment name in the world."

Jaebum's jaw drops as he watches you laugh with an incredulous look on his face. "Wow, you really- "

"I'm joking, I'm joking!" You cackle unreservedly. "Forgive me."

Jaebum decides to poke some fun at you. "No, I don't think I will."

Your face falls. "Ah, oppa, please! We only just met!"

Jaebum shakes his head stubbornly, taking a sip of his drink.

"Fine." You resolve. "If it helps my case in any way, I'll personally make it my mission to find you a better segment name."

Jaebum shrugs, swallowing his drink as he watches you munch on his chips. "I don't see the point of changing it, to be honest. I'll be gone in a couple of months."

"Okay, first of all, graduation's still in March. It's only September, you still have a long way to go." You point out. "Second of all, that's all the more reason to change it! You don't want to leave this school known as the guy who couldn't come up with a cooler name for his segment now, do you?"

Jaebum narrows his eyes. "As much as I hate to admit it, you make a valid point."

"Of course, I do." At this, Jaebum scoffs, making you laugh. "Look, since you're obviously incapable of doing it yourself, I'll do it, okay?"

Jaebum looks at you incredulously. "Yah. Don't you think you've insulted me enough?"

"Sorry! Sorry, I'm joking." You apologize quickly. "I can't help it. I'll stop, I promise. As an apology for my behavior, how about I make you a drink?"

Jaebum accepts, looking into his cup with distaste. "Why the hell not? You owe it to me to make me one, and this one tastes like shit anyways."

You get up from your stool. "I'll be right back."

The both of you fall into conversation so naturally that night, that neither of you notice how long you talk for until the music dies and the small crowd goes quiet. You exit the kitchen to be greeted by the sight of passed out bodies sprawled across the floor, the party host nowhere in sight. While you do a thorough check of the first floor for any conscious party-goers, Jaebum does a sweep of the second floor to find Jackson unconscious on his bed. Setting some painkillers and a glass of water on his bedside table, Jaebum goes back downstairs and leaves the house with you, locking the door as you walk out. You quietly chat about random things as he walks you back to your dorm, and Jaebum decides he wants to be your friend. Obtaining your number, the both of you text each other the next day. And the day after that. And the day after that.

Suddenly, going to parties doesn't seem so bad anymore.

-=-=-=-

Jaebum feels his phone vibrate in his pocket as he exits his last class of the day.

Y/N: Hey, are you doing anything for the rest of the day?

He feels a smile growing on his lips, but he stops himself from smiling at his phone in public.

JB: No, why?

Y/N: Last class' prof isn't showing up, and everyone else is busy. Want to get dinner?

JB: It's like...5pm.

Y/N: Fine. Want to eat food, extend eating into the hours of the night, and call it dinner?

At this, Jaebum allows the corners of his mouth to curl up in a grin.

JB: Sure. Where do you want to meet?

Y/N: I'm at the convenience store in front of the social sciences building. Bring your wallet.

Jaebum can't help but chuckle at this. He immediately stuffs his notebook in his bag, and heads for the social sciences building. When he gets there, he sees you standing outside the convenience store across the street. He's about to cross when he sees you motion for him to stay put, crossing the street yourself. In your hand is a plastic bag of various snacks and drinks that you had just purchased.

"Take this, please." You heave, holding the bag out for him to take. Jaebum receives it, noticing red marks on your hand, left behind by the weight of the bag. "Thank you. God, that's heavy."

"You could've asked for two bags." Jaebum points out, falling into step beside you as the both of you walk in the direction of a nearby park. You shake your head adamantly.

"Tsk, tsk, Jaebum. Don't think like that. It's not good for the environment." You tut, imitating the tone of a mom scolding her child. "Do you want help with your bag?"

He raises an eyebrow. "You just gave this to me, and now you want it back?"

"Not the convenience store bag, dummy." You smile. "Your backpack, I meant."

"Ah. No, I'm fine." Jaebum refuses.

"You sure?" You press. "The bag I gave you is quite heavy, and I'm not carrying anything. I'd feel bad if you were the only one doing the work here."

Jaebum smirks, turning his head to look at you. "What kind of man would I be if I made you carry my bag for me?"

Your jaw drops and you put a hand to your chest dramatically. "Now why'd you have to bring gender roles into this? I'm just offering an exchange of baggage!"

Shaking his head, Jaebum's smile doesn't leave his face as the both of you arrive at the park and settle on the grass. He sits, crossing his ripped-jean clad legs. You mirror his position, sitting in front of him, comfortable in your leggings. Tugging the plastic bag closer, you pours out its contents onto the grass, revealing bags of chips, and four bottles of drinks, two of each kind.

"First things first," You start. "Don't think I'm some kind of gold digger or anything like that just because I told you to bring your wallet."

Jaebum smirks, looking at you with amusement. "Wasn't planning on it."

"I only asked you to bring your wallet because since I bought us snacks, I expect you to pay for dinner." You declare, ripping open a bag of chips. "And not in the gentleman-should-always-pay manner, but in the it's-my-turn-to-pay manner."

"Sounds fair." He helps himself to another bag, opening it and setting it in between them so that the both of them can share. "What are you, some kind of feminist?"

You cock your head to the side in genuine confusion. "Huh?"

"That's the second comment you've made today about gender roles."

"Oh." You laugh, understanding. "No, I'm not. I just don't like it when people hear my words but listen to a different meaning, so I have a habit of saying things explicitly. Miscommunication is so common these days, don't you think?"

He nods in agreement. "Too true."

"Besides," you add, lifting a chip to your mouth but not eating it yet. "it's easier to let people know what type of person you are straight up instead of having them judge every single thing you do."

Jaebum thoughtfully watches you as you continue to munch on your salty snack. As a student, he was too familiar with the saying 'honesty is the best policy', having heard it almost every day, but you take it to a different level, give it a completely different meaning.

Noticing his blatant staring, you raise an eyebrow in the middle of chewing. "Why are you staring at me like that?" You ask, voice muffled by the hand you raise to cover your mouth.

"Oh. Uh, nothing." Jaebum answers, averting his eyes. "You're probably the most honest person I've ever met."

The expression on your face is unreadable, Jaebum decides, as you nod.

"It's a good thing." He adds, just in case it isn't clear.

Not failing to pick up on this, you chuckle, tucking your hair behind your ear. "Really? Most people don't think so."

"Oh? Why not?"

You shrug. "A lot of people say I'm too blunt. Too brutal when it comes to expressing myself. That I don't know how to sugar coat even the harshest words."

"And how do you feel about that?"

You shrug, meeting his eyes. "I don't really care. They're all empty words. At the end of the day, the truth is the truth, and nothing can change that."

At that moment, Jaebum notices the sun starting to set. Its light tints everything in hues of orange and purple, reflecting off of the brown of your eyes. The last rays of the day kiss your skin and the strands of your hair, giving you an ethereal glow.

"Stay put." Jaebum orders, reaching into his bag and digging around for his camera.

"Didn't have plans of moving at all." You comment.

Jaebum brings out his camera and turns it on, hoping to capture the scene before him.

"Smile." He tells you.

Lightly grinning and striking a casual pose, you stare back at the camera lens. You watch as Jaebum frequently changes his position, making sure to not leave any angle uncaptured. He even plucks a random daisy he found, asking you to hold it up to your face and pose with it. You oblige, even moving your snacks aside so you could get up to stand and pose as Jaebum directs you from behind the camera.

By the time Jaebum decides he's done with the impromptu photoshoot, the sun's completely gone, and your space on the ground is dimly lit by a nearby streetlight. You finish the rest of your snacks and drinks while looking at the pictures he took, and when that's done, fall into natural conversation as you walk around, looking for a good restaurant.

"Was that for a project?" You ask as you’re seated at one of the tables in a barbeque restaurant.

"The pictures? No." Jaebum answers, picking up the menu card and scanning it. The both of you had previously decided that since he would be the one paying, he would be choosing the menu for tonight.

"Then why take so many?" You ask, thanking the waitress that comes to bring them your side dishes.

Before the waitress leaves, Jaebum places his orders and returns the menu card. "I had to take a photography class in my freshman year. It became a hobby of mine."

"Do you have a photography account on Instagram or something?" You ask. "Photographers are into that, right?"

"Yeah, I do." He confirms, somewhat baffled. "How are you so good at that?"

"Hm?" You raise your eyebrows. "Good at what?"

"You're the only person to ask me these without me having to mention it first. None of my friends asked about the radio segment or my Instagram. I've barely known you for a week and you've already figured out both!"

You shrug, smiling and sitting up as the meat is served. "Intuition, I guess."

As Jaebum gets to work in grilling the meat, you nibble on the side dishes. Dinner is quiet. The two of you fall into a comfortable silence, your chewing being accompanied by soft sounds of approval at the taste of the meat.

You guys finish eating just before the clock strikes 8pm. You wait outside as Jaebum settles the bill, and you both decide you want to take a walk before returning home.

"Before I forget," You start, brushing your hair back. From his angle, Jaebum can see the way the streetlights illuminate your face, giving your skin a warm glow. The shadows that fall across your features contrast greatly against the milky color of your skin, giving your face depth and definition. The moonlight kisses the highest points of your face and brings a twinkle to your eyes, nature giving you an ethereal glow for the second time that day. Despite it only being his second time to witness this kind of natural beauty, Jaebum didn't think he would ever get tired of seeing you like this, nor did he think he would ever stop craving to capture every single moment like it.

"Def's Soul." You say.

Jaebum blinks. "What?"

"I told you I would come up with a new name for your segment." You state simply. "I decided on one just in time for your next appearance on the station."

"But, that's just my code name."

You hum in disagreement. "No, it's not. Def's Soul. As in, the soul of Def. Your soul."

Jaebum looks at you in amusement. He has to admit; it is kind of catchy.

"Music comes from within, right? By sharing your music to the world, you're giving everyone who listens a peek into your soul, your mind. I thought of calling it 'Peeking Into Defsoul', but that's just not attractive to listen to, it has a weird connotation, and it's worse than what you've got now. You can also call it 'Soul in Seoul; by Def', but I think 'Def's Soul' is the best." You finish your mini ramble about the segment name, turning to look at Jaebum's reaction. Jaebum can see on your face that you’re happy with what you had come up with, and abandons all plans of bickering with you about not needing to change the name of his segment at all.

"Okay." He concludes. "Def's Soul it is."

-=-=-=-

"Hey, everybody, welcome back. I hope you all had a wonderful week, hung out with some friends, aced all your tests. I know I certainly did. Even if you didn't, there's always next week.

Before we get down to business and listen to some sick tunes, I just want everyone to know that I'm going to be changing my segment name. That's right, from now on this segment will no longer be known as 'Friday Nights with Defsoul', but 'Def's Soul'.  As in my soul.

If you want to know why, ask away and I'll reply in a bit, but for now, let's welcome the weekend with Sucker by the Jonas Brothers."

The live comments feed is suddenly full of questions on why he suddenly decided to change the segment name. When the song comes to an end, Jaebum turns the microphone back on.

"A lot of you are asking why I suddenly decided to change the name.

To be honest, it wasn't my idea at all. I was content with the previous name, but I met someone who recognized my voice from radio and told me that it was such a corny name. So, she helped choose a new name, and that's when she mentioned 'Def's Soul'.

Basically, it means that by showing you all my music and my personal playlists, I'm giving you guys a peek into my soul, my mind. A song says a lot about the composer and lyricist, the same way you can tell a lot about someone by the way they compile their personal playlists.

In my opinion, it's one of the most intimate things a person can bare, yet also one of the vaguest. As those of you who study the arts should know, art can be interpreted in many different ways. Some interpretations are exactly the message you want to convey, and others are the exact opposite. So, by sharing my music with you, I'm baring my soul while at the same time, covering it up for you guys to decipher and uncover.

Here's your next look: we have one of my personal favorites, Teenager, by yours truly, featuring my friend, Jackson Wang. Enjoy."

Jaebum switches off the microphone, leaning back in his chair and sipping on a bottle of water as he listens to one of his latest compositions blare through the speakers of the studio.

Things in front of my eyes look new...

You brighten even the deep part of my heart...

-=-=-=-

"You were right." Jaebum comments, sinking down on the grass. You look up, and, seeing the cat in Jaebum's arms, take hold of it immediately, cooing and petting its head. "Def's Soul is a much better name."

You raise an eyebrow, looking at him triumphantly. "Oh? What made you realize it?"

"A couple of kids in my cinematography class were talking about it." He says. "Then I passed a couple of people on my way here who were also talking about it. I guess it just rolls of the tongue more easily."

You grin as you strokes the cat's head. It purrs, nuzzling its head against your arm. "I'm glad."

You stroke it a couple of more times. "What's her name?"

Jaebum looks at you blankly, clearly not paying attention. You chuckle. "Your cat. What's her name?"

"Nora." Jaebum watches as his cat cozies up to you, looking the most content she ever had. "She likes you."

"Really? I like her too." You grin widely, bringing Nora to your face to rub cheeks with her.

"You should cat-sit sometime." Jaebum suggests. "I tend to get really busy with practice."

"Practice? For what?" You ask.

"Dance practice. I'm part of a performance group."

You stare at him unbelievingly. "No way. For real?"

Jaebum nods nonchalantly.

"That's so cool! You're so multi-talented, can I watch you guys practice? I'll take care of Nora in the practice room and I'll stay out of your way. Promise!"

Chuckling at your enthusiasm, Jaebum finds himself nodding. "Sure. You can stay with Youngjae's friend who always comes."

"Yes!" You cheer, then lean down to talk to Nora. "You hear that Nora? We're going to see Jaebum-oppa dance!"

A strange feeling appears in Jaebum's chest, one he can't explain. "What?"

Looking up innocently, you meet his eyes. "Hm?"

"What did you call me?"

Tilting your head confusedly, you answer. "Oppa?"

Calm down, Jaebum, your heart's beating a little too fast right now. Stop thinking about how cute she is when she does that. "Why? You never call me that."

"I was...talking to Nora..." You say, confused as to why it was such a big deal.

Oh, Y/N. If only you knew.

-=-=-=-

A couple of days later, you find yourself walking alongside Jaebum, Nora's carrier in hand. He's leading you to their practice room, telling you stories on the way there. Like how one time, the boys had a bonding night and ended up drinking too many bottles of soju. One of their maknaes, Bambam from Thailand, had apparently unbuttoned the top buttons of his shirt and, singing wildly, started swinging around on a streetlight as if it was a pole. When the both of you arrive at the studio, your stomach hurt from all the laughing you did on your walk there.

As you approach the door, muffled sounds can be heard through the walls from the inside.

"Yah, get that away from me!" Youngjae, Jaebum notes.

"Kim Yugyeom, I swEAR to god I will kick your ass if you- " Youngjae's friend, Nayoung.

"I'm joking, noona, I'm joking!" That's Yugyeom.

"Hyung, please-!" Youngjae again.

"What happened to my hair?!" Bambam, in front of the mirror, probably.

"Really, no one cares." Jinyoung.

Plus, a loud cackle that can only belong to Jackson. That leaves Mark, though he's probably resting on the couch, so everyone's present.

As he slowly swings the door open, you clearly hear the commotion inside- though it sounds more like chaos to you.

"Sorry. They're a bit noisy." Jaebum tells you as he holds open the door so you can walk through.

"A bit?" You scoff. "I'll say."

Fully stepping into the room, your suspicions are only confirmed as you’re met with the sight of five guys and a girl causing a scene in the wide space. From where he stands, Jaebum can see Jackson chasing Youngjae with something furry in his hand, the latter not realizing that it was fake and running away screaming for his hyung to stop. Yugyeom's holding out something as equally furry, except it's directed towards the only other female in the room. The girl, Nayoung, then proceeds to take one of the few pillows on the couch, raising it above her head to protect herself from whatever Yugyeom is threatening her with, before knocking the thing out of his hands and chasing him around the room, ready to beat his ass. Bambam stands in front of the mirror in a state of distress as he runs his fingers through his now blonde hair. Jinyoung stands at his side, looking like he had better things to do, yet still taking the time to laugh at Bambam's situation. All this chaos and Mark is calmly perched on the couch, tapping away at his phone and playing a game.

At the sight of a newcomer, this all stops.

"Everyone, this is- "

"Y/N!" A loud voice that can only belong to Jackson yells. You laugh as one of your closest friends comes running and tackles you in a hug. Jaebum suddenly feels the need to unwrap Jackson's arms, but since he knows that you guys are close friends, he controls himself from following through with his tendencies.

One by one, the others unfreeze from their positions. Bambam is the first to approach, though for a completely different reason.

Sitting down in front of you, he unlatches the opening of Nora's carrier and lets her crawl onto his lap. "Hi Nora~ I missed you. It's been a while." He coos.

Jaebum sets his things down in a corner of the room and watches as Jackson introduces you to everyone. The group's practice ensues after that, and you and Nayoung sit on the couch, making sure to keep out of the boys' way.

While he dances, Jaebum steals glances of you in the mirror. His chest becomes warm and his smile only grows bigger whenever he manages to catch you enjoying the song they're dancing to- his song. Page.

By the end of it all, the nine of them gather in a circle on the floor, sharing tupperwares of Nayoung's homemade kimbap, stir-fried pork, and rice balls. Then, as if the heavy snack isn't enough to satiate their hunger, the group leaves the studio and heads for a restaurant just halfway down the block.

Jaebum ends up sitting beside you and across Jackson. The group place their orders for boxes of chicken and bottles of beer. Once the food arrives, everyone's mouth is soon preoccupied with eating.

"Hey Jaebum-hyung. Are we still up for that music video shooting next week?" Jinyoung pipes up, taking a sip of his beer. "I need to know whether or not I can visit home."

"I'm still looking for someone to help me film. A lot of the people in my class are too busy with their own projects." Jaebum answers. "If I don't find anyone by Thursday, you can tell your mom you'll be home for the three-day weekend."

"Why don't you ask Y/N to do it?" Jackson says, gesturing to you with nod of his head. "You were a videographer at one point, right? In high school?"

You narrow your eyes at him. "I don't remember telling you that, but yes, I was."

"Really? Would you be willing to help us film?" Jaebum asks, turning to his left to face you. "It's for my final project, and you'll be fully credited."

You shrug. "Sure. Just give me a time and place and I'll let you know if I'm free."

The following weekend, you help them film, and Jaebum finds that he really likes the way you do it. He also has fun editing the music video for his cinematography class, and decides that it would be a good idea to film more music and performance videos. The credits are always the same; you as the camerawoman, Nayoung as the hair stylist and makeup artist, Jaebum as the editor, director, and producer, and GOT7 as the cast. It's a fun little hobby.

Months pass and before you know it, it's the last month of your senior year. In a couple of weeks, you would be taking the last exams of your college career and a few weeks after that, you'd be graduating and leaving this place forever.

That should've been Jaebum's only worry.

But he started noticing recently that you were looking a little worse for wear. Your undereye area was looking a lot darker than normal, your skin turned a sickly pale tone, and you lost a lot of weight. He knew that you were aware of these changes as you started wearing masks more, and often hid behind baggy clothing- most of which consisted of his hoodies.

He'd tried talking to you about it, but you, like him, weren't the type to be open about your struggles and personal problems. So, he'd let you be, watching over you from afar, and taking care of you in whatever way he could. Jaebum would drive you to your part-time job if he was free, so you could rest in his car instead of tiring yourself out by taking the bus and walking. He'd show up at your apartment in the morning when he knew you would still be in there, more often than not holding a breakfast pastry and smoothie in his hands. He'd make sure you ate properly and didn't miss any meals, and even helped you study for your exams (Most of his were practical, anyway. He didn't have as much to memorize as you did.). He was the reason the amount of cup noodles you were accustomed to consuming lessened significantly.

Despite all of Jaebum's efforts, you didn't seem to improve at all.

On this particular Thursday morning, Jaebum knocks on your door holding a ham and cheese croissant in one hand and a jug of organic orange juice (courtesy of Jackson) in the other. There's a stumble from the inside of the unit, and you open the door, flustered.

Cute. Jaebum watches as you stand there in your mismatched pajamas, bare face, and messy hair that's sticking up all over the place. You cover your mouth, yawning. He frowns at the sight of your eye bags and sickly skin, but covers this up with a cheery grin. "Good morning!"

"Jaebum?" You mumble sleepily. "What time is it?"

He checks his watch. "Almost 10 in the morning. I wanted to wake you up so you'd have time to eat before your 1pm exam."

At the mention of the academic enemy, your eyes widen. "Shit. I was supposed to wake up two hours ago! I'm not done studying!"

You run back into the apartment, leaving Jaebum to let himself in and lock the door behind him. He watches as you frantically flip through your notes and continues studying your reviewer in obvious distress.

Setting the food beside her, he ruffles your hair. "Eat."

Without looking back to check if you listen, Jaebum makes his way into the kitchen and starts cooking up lunch for the two of you. He figures a healthy serving of spicy soft tofu stew would be just what you needed to get through the day.

Jaebum adds lots of meat to the pot, and even cooks rice for the both of you. While the stew is boiling, he sets the table, bringing out utensils, glasses, and a pitcher of water. By the time he finishes cooking, it's 11am, and he guesses that you have just enough time to eat, shower, and cram study some more.

He brings the steaming pot of jjigae to the dining table and literally has to peel you away from your notes. It doesn't take much to make you eat; you quickly figure out that the sooner you finish your share of the meal, the sooner Jaebum would allow you to return to your cramming. Scarfing down the food with no shame, you finish eating in less than ten minutes, while Jaebum sits beside you, leisurely consuming his portion. He eats slowly, calmly, and watches amusedly as you become frantic about studying again.

Jaebum finishes up his meal and cleans the table, even doing the dishes. When the clock strikes exactly 12:15pm, he forces you to take a shower, holding the door close from the outside. He only leaves after you stop trying to pry it open and he hears the water running.

By 12:50pm, Jaebum is walking you to your exam hall, where he stops a few feet from the door to let you go in by yourself. You stop in your tracks, turn to face Jaebum, and give him a shy smile.

"Thank you..." you start. "For doing what you did. You didn't need to, but you did. All of it."

Jaebum finds himself smiling, his chest warming up. "It's no big deal."

"No, but," you continue. "I'm really grateful. More than you could ever know. I owe you one."

"You don't owe me anything." Jaebum tells you. "Consider this as payment for all the times you filmed for us."

You start to shake your head, but Jaebum speaks up again. "Besides, as your friend, it's sort of my job to take care of you."

You chuckle and smile, staring at him with fond eyes. "Still. Thank you."

Jaebum doesn't expect what you do next. He's frozen in place as you step forward to stand on your toes and press a soft kiss to his cheek. There's no trace of shyness on your face as you step back, give him a bright smile, and turn around to enter the exam hall.

Jaebum's sure that his ears had gone red by the time he finally moves (a good five minutes later). Unable to calm his heart down, he takes deep breaths as he makes his way back to his apartment. The moment he steps in and closes the door behind him, Nora comes padding up to him with her soft paws- the exact moment he decides to let out an excited and joyful scream.

She kissed me. She actually kissed me.

The smile on Jaebum's face never leaves him for the rest of the day.

-=-=-=-

It's a couple of days later that Jaebum convinces you to finally take a break. Between your part-time job and studying for finals, you were exhausted, and it was starting to show physically.

Since he knows that you would study if he left you alone in your apartment, he manages to drag you out of yours and into his with the goal of hanging out by eating a big meal together. Jaebum had prepared multiple boxes and orders of delivery food; pizza, hamburgers, jokbal, fried chicken, bossam, you name it. He's rather proud of how he set it all up in his living room: a comfortable layout of pillows and blankets, the coffee table in front of them completely covered in the food, and his TV ready to play whatever movie Netflix could provide.

"So how do you think you did on your exams so far?" Jaebum asks as you both begin to open up the different boxes of food.

"Let's not talk about that, please. I'm going to want to study again and that completely defies the purpose of this break." You respond, helping yourself to the jokbal.

Jaebum nods. "Fair enough."

He clears his throat. "How are you, then?"

You shrug. "Fine enough. How are you?"

"Fine enough." Jaebum repeats, a small grin on his face. You mirrors his expression when you catch onto what he did.

Meeting with you was always like this. Somehow, you brought out the playful side of him and you almost always ended up giggling at nothing.

"I'm just a little tired but I'll be fine." You add, bringing a piece of meat to your lips and giving him a half-hearted smile.

Jaebum studies you as he eats, stealing glances at you every now and then. When you both decide you're done eating, Jaebum persuades you to rest on the couch while he cleans up. He walks back into the living room to find that you had started watching a movie, and sinks down onto the couch beside you. Hardly paying attention to the movie, Jaebum finds himself watching you.

He's under the impression that you’re completely immersed in the movie and didn't think you'd notice, but you pause the movie and set the remote down, turning to look at him with a questioning look on your face.

"What is it, Jaebum?" You ask.

Jaebum gives you an innocent look. "Hmm?"

"You've been staring at me since dinner. What's the matter?"

Jaebum sighs. He isn't getting out of this one. "I'm just worried, I guess."

"About what?"

"You. You suck at taking care of yourself. Every time I see you, it's like your eye bags have gotten darker, you've lost more weight, you have less energy, you're paler-"

"Okay, okay, I get it." You cut him off, chuckling. Jaebum stares at you incredulously.

"Are you laughing?" He asks. "Is this funny to you? I'm worried about your health and well-being and you have the audacity to laugh at me?"

You shake your head, smiling at him. "You're too cute, Jaebum-ah."

Jaebum stops and his body has no other reaction other than to huff and turn away.

"I'm not laughing at you. Promise. It's just cute how you're so worried." You say. "Why are you even bothered so much anyway? It's not like I'm dying."

Jaebum gives you a deadpan look. "This is what I get for being concerned? You're an ungrateful friend."

This makes you burst out into loud laughter, and it's so contagious that Jaebum can't help but join in. When the both of you calm down, you give him another smile. "You don't need to worry, Jaebum. I'm fine."

Jaebum doesn't agree. He always worries about you. But he doesn't say that and just nods.

You turn away. "Geez, you worry too much. It's not like you're my boyfriend or anything."

Jaebum freezes at that statement. For some reason, it hurt. A lot.

You’ve already resumed playing the movie, so he mumbles to himself. "What's so wrong with that?"

"Hmm? What was that?" You ask, pausing the movie again to look at him.

Jaebum turns his face to look at you. He has no doubt his emotions are displayed all over his face. His heart feels heavy- is it really so bad that he wants to be yours? You made it seem so...unappealing.

"Hey." Your voice comes out cautious, gentle. "You okay?"

Jaebum breaks his silence, raising his eyes to look at you properly. "Would it really be so bad? If I wanted to be?"

Your eyes widen. "Jaebum, I-"

"Answer me. You make it seem as if dating me is such an unappealing concept. Is it really that bad?" Jaebum's voice came out weak, insecure, and he hates it. He was never really the insecure one. Everything he did, he did it with the security of hard work and perseverance to support his confidence.

But not this. How could he ever have prepared for this?

"Of course not." You answer immediately.

"Then why say it like that?" Jaebum snaps.

Oops. Maybe that was a mistake.

You frown. "What are you getting mad at me for? I was just checking up on you, and now you're being all snappy!"

"I just-" Jaebum gives up. "Never mind."

He feels like collapsing. The conversation escalated pretty quickly from him checking up on you, and he hates feeling like he's on the edge of breaking your friendship. He hates not being able to do more. Why couldn't he just man up and tell you how he felt already? How hard could it be?

Evidently, it's extremely difficult.

"No, I will not. Talk to me. You keep avoiding the topic and it's obviously bothering you." You press. "What's the problem?"

Jaebum groans in frustration. "I said don't mind it. I'm fine."

"Do you think I'm stupid, Im Jaebum? You think I'm an idiot?"

"No."

"Then talk to me!"

"No!"

"You're being ridiculous-"

"I said I'm fine!"

"Why's it so hard for you to open up-"

"Because I like you, okay?!"

Oops. That wasn't supposed to come out.

"All I want to do is care for you and take care of you because I hate seeing you suffer. Why do you think I dragged you over here to rest? Why do you think I worked so hard to take care of you all these past weeks? Why do you try to deny everything that I do for you, saying I don't need to? Okay, maybe I don't need to do anything for you, but I want to. Why can't you let me care for you the way I want to?"

Jaebum's heart is racing. He'd never felt anything as overwhelming as this before. The pain of wanting to do so much for someone who didn't want him to- what did that tell him?

You’re frozen, quiet, so Jaebum continues. "If you want me to stop, if you really don't want me to do anything for you anymore, say it here and now. I'll stop for you. Tell me you don't like me back and I'll stop it all."

"It's not that I don't like it-" you start.

"Then what?" Jaebum cuts in, voice hard. "Why-"

"Jaebum!" You snap in a tone that had the ability to zip Jaebum's mouth shut. "Let me speak!"

Jaebum backs down immediately.

You sigh. "Look. I'm sorry I ever made you feel that way. I didn't mean to make it seem like I didn't want you to take care of me. I like it when you show that you care, I really do. It's nice to have someone looking out for you, you know?"

"Then why deny it?"

"I guess I didn't want to be a burden to anyone." You shrug.

Jaebum stares at you disbelievingly. "You'd never be a burden to me."

"And I know that now." You say. "I just- ugh, I didn't want to impose. I felt like I was just an extra load to everything else you were carrying. You already do so much, and here I am, like a newborn baby, terrible at taking care of her own body and needing one of her best friends to take care of it for her."

Jaebum's face lights up. "I'm one of your best friends?" He asks with a cheeky smile on his face.

You hit him on the arm. "Yah. Is that all you got?"

"Aish. I listened, I did!" He insists. "But am I really that important to you?"

You huff and turn away, but mumble under your breath nonetheless, "Yeah."

A wide smile breaks out on Jaebum's face and he can't help but throw his arms around you in a bear hug.

"Y-yah. Wha-what is this? Don't people usually hate it when their crushes call them a best friend? Why are you so happy?" You stutter.

Jaebum lifts his head to look at you. Your face is quickly going red and there's a nervous look in your eyes. He gives you a big smile. "You calling me one of your best friends means you consider me one of the most important people in your life. Even if you don't return my feelings, it's fine. I'll take what you're ready to give me, even if it's just a friend-zone."

And you understand. Jaebum sees it in the way your features soften and the way your body relaxes against his. Suddenly gaining a shot of courage, you lean forward a little bit, smirking lightly.

"I never said I friend-zoned you." You say lowly. You’re mere inches away from his face and Jaebum can feel your breath against his lips.

It's his turn to stiffen, his turn to grow nervous. "You just did..."

You daringly bring your hands up around his neck to bury your fingers in his hair- a sensation Jaebum realizes he'd never get tired of. You smile teasingly. "That was before."

Jaebum gulps audibly. "B-before what?"

You chuckle fondly. "Is the Im Jaebum stuttering? What a historic day."

"N-no, I'm not-"

Jaebum never finishes his sentence because his lips are suddenly trapped in a lip-lock with those of the woman in his arms.

And no, sparks don't fly. They never really do, Jaebum realizes. What happens is much better.

His heart beats faster than he ever thought was possible and his head goes fuzzy. Before this, he was frozen stiff, but the second your lips start to move together, electricity courses through his veins, his entire body awake- alive.

You take over all his senses- he feels intoxicated in the best way possible. His senses are heightened and he's suddenly aware of everything that is you. Only you.

He feels you smiling as you lean back into the couch, pulling him with you. Jaebum can't help but smile himself, as he crawls over your body on the couch, the kiss never breaking.

This. This is a billion times better than the friend-zone.

[kpopchangedme]

Folks & Hooligans | Im Jaebum

The best festivals are always the ones where folks dress like royalty and princes go rogue...

Protagonist: Im Jaebum & You 

Word Count: 2.2k (got carried away, oops!)

Genre: SFW - Romance - Royalty - [Drabble 2k]

Prompt: “People are staring”

GOT7 | M.list

A girl like you can only wear so much crinoline fabric before she starts losing her damn mind...

There’s something about all those champagne flutes being refilled every time they’re emptied, that orchestra never missing a single beat, the candelabras all lit at once above the palace’ ballroom… Magic is in the air. It’s in each bubble reaching the surface of the effervescent liquid in your glass, it’s in the luxurious sounds coming from your heavy gown every move you make. It is addictive. The Festival of Masks is supposed to feel exactly like this every year, but you wouldn’t know since it’s the first time you are free from kitchen duties.

“Milady,” Your old friend Wonpil pulls you out of your reverie by theatrically bowing down in front of you. He’s wearing a fancy black costume and a silvery mask covers his features entirely, but you still identify his familiar clumsiness. “Good evening to you.”

“Likewise,” playing the part, you extend your gloved hand and he hurries to kiss it, “I don’t believe we’ve met before. I’m afraid the pleasure is all mine, Sir.” Wonpil smiles squarely at the joke, blushing under his mask. He runs his fingers on the rich fabric of his extravagant waistcoat nervously.

“It’s me, Miss y/n,” Leaning into your ear, he whispers in fake secrecy, “the royal coachman.”

“Oh!” Fanning your masked face, you pretend to be embarrassed by the confusion and his smile widens, “You looked so fancy, I thought you were one of the princes!”

“You’re the biggest transformation...” Wonpil shakes his head, glancing around at the crowd of dancers enjoying the masquerade. “You look enchanting!”

“This dress is slightly different than what I usually wear, I must admit.”

“Well, today we can be whatever we want, that’s the whole point.” The young man runs a hand through his pulled back dark hair, eyeing a petite woman leaning over the buffet. You’ve lost his interest. “Do you think that could be Dahyun?”

You follow his gaze, “Oh, I think it might-” But already he’s gone, and you roll your eyes back, irked but unsurprised by his lack of consideration. He’s always been like that ever since you were children, never paying attention long enough to notice you’d enjoy if he did. “Enchanting my arse.”

“Fret not, I assure you it is lovely from here,” Someone rudely chimes in from behind you and your sip of champagne goes down the wrong pipe.

“I beg your pardon?” You’re coughing to recover as you turn to face the masked stranger, eyes teary and throat on fire.

“Your arse, Miss,” He says without any shame, now standing in front of you. Even upset and after many years, you recognise him right away. In his gorgeous crimson suit, it’d be foolish to mistake him for anyone else and he isn’t the kind of man a gal easily forgets.

“Oh…” You exhale, startled, and his teasing smile stretches dangerously under his golden intricate mask. That perfect mischievous toothy grin everyone knows so well within the palace walls.

“Oh?” The first-born prince Im Jaebum, mimics back and you courtesy awkwardly. “Not quite the reaction I was hoping for, Miss.”

You’re about to excuse yourself when you remember he has no idea who he’s teasing this time. As a teenager, he was known as quite the troublemaker by the servants, and you also had the misfortune of getting caught once or twice in his shenanigans. Instead of avoiding him like you should, you decide to tease back a little. It’s not like he’ll recognise someone like you. He just got back after 3 years of guiding the army on the front lines. He was sent there by the High King in the hopes of ‘taming’ his defiant nature.

“Were you hoping to offend me?” You boldly grin as you speak and the rebellious prince leans in, interested. “This is what masquerades are for, afterall...” He doesn’t seem to notice and follows when you step back. You have to press yourself against the nearest pillar to stay at an appropriate distance.

“What is the point of all this fuss, Miss? I’m afraid I’ve missed festivities for so long I can’t quite remember...” His eyes unmistakably dip on the front of your dress, right where your breasts are exposed, constricted by the corset you aren’t used to wear. You would roll your eyes if you weren’t trying to keep a cool exterior. Miss. So you were right, there’s no way the prince would recognise kitchen staff like you, much less after his years away. “I beg you, kiss and tell,” he insists with a smirk.

“W-Well, folks masquerade as royals...” Your breath catches when his dark gaze finally climbs back to yours, “so... Princes behave as hooligans.” You hold your breath; you just called a royal out for his improper conduct.

“Really Miss?” The prince only smirks, not looking insulted at all. “Do you truly believe the festival is why...” Without warning, his palm finds the pillar next to your head and his left hand grabs a curl that has escaped your bun. He leans above you, caging you against the marble until there’s almost no space left between your bodies. “.... I feel like misbehaving...”

Prince Jaebum toys with your hair and you stand there, completely frozen by the intimate gesture. He bites his lips, looking down at you and obviously enjoying your uneasiness. He is infamous for his charm and wit, dangerous character traits you’ve been warned about by other women for years. Now you’re beginning to see why. Your palms are sweaty, and you swear your bodice is getting tighter by the seconds. From this close, it doesn’t seem like time in the army did his playful character any good.

“People are staring��” You manage to mutter in a daze.

“Let them.” Although the prince doesn’t move, his dark irises slide to the corner of his eyes to glance at the busy crowd. It feels like the entire kingdom is in this ballroom. “I assure you... I would take offense if they were looking anywhere else but at you, Miss.” He says this easily, with all the confidence in the world, and your heart skips a beat.

Your little gasp at his shameless compliment makes his lips curl upwards, pleased. “Your Royal Highness...” You whisper in awe, trying to get yourself together again. You miss how quickly that smile falls from his face when you use his rank.

In a heartbeat you are both gone from the publicness of the ballroom. The unruly prince’s hand is wrapped around your wrist, pulling you through a warren of familiar stone corridors. You surprise yourself by following obediently, it’s like you don’t know any better. You’re excited and curious, a part of you wanting to know exactly where this momentary noble disguise can take you. He finally stops when you reach an alcove in the empty west wing of the palace, far away from the festivities. The prince sighs, untying the black ribbon holding his mask in place. You stare in awe at his handsome face, only now fully realising the predicament you’re in. He looks way manlier than the last time you’ve seen him and then again, you have never stood this close. Seeing as you don’t do the same, he rolls his eyes, raising his arms to get rid of your mask himself. Refusing to reveal your identity, you step back until you’re caught against a stone wall again. He can’t find out who you are, especially since you’ve called him out for his inappropriate behaviour. If he recognised you, you would probably lose your job. His brows raise in annoyance, but he lets his arms fall to his sides aimlessly.

“Folks masquerade as royals for one night, Sir. Anonymity is a given.”  

Prince Jaebum chuckles at your explanation, shaking his head slightly. He takes a step closer, way too close for appropriate etiquette, and you must tilt your head to keep looking at him.

“Then perhaps you should’ve known better than to follow a one-night hooligan down here...” Your lips part, about to say something witty back, but he runs his finger along your jawline, making you forget everything. “Mr. Kim was right, you are absolutely enchanting tonight...” Complimenting you once more, the prince drops his head. He’s so close you can feel the warmth coming from his body even through your layers of formal clothing. His breath is on your neck making you shiver, and shut both eyes, overwhelmed. “Do you want to hear a secret, Miss?” His lips brush your ear and you grip his waistcoat to stay up, the gesture causing him to chuckle again.

“Y-Yes?” That’s it. You’ve lost your mind. Here you are clinging to one of the princes, the heir to the throne of them all! The magic from tonight has really made you into someone else.

He blinks, merriment giving way to an odd seriousness, “I find you look even better in your kitchen’ uniform...”

“You…” So he did recognise you! He watches you struggle with this confession through his eyelashes, still holding your neck with one of his hands. “You are making fun of me, Sir.”

“If only I was!” The prince laughs at that, thumb stocking your jaw. “One would have to be blind to overlook you...”

Again, instead of doing the right thing, you simply falter at his compliment. “Your Royal Highness…”

He sighs, closing both eyes briefly. “I’m a hooligan remember, address me by my name.”

“Oh,” your eyes round in amazement, “I c-couldn’t, Sir!”

“May I call you y/n?” Prince Jaebum tries your name and the simple sound of it coming from his mouth makes something stir in your stomach. You nod slightly, like under a spell. He doesn’t seem half as rude from up close. “May I take off your mask, y/n?” You nod once more, but already he’s pulling at the ribbons, untying the bow holding it in place. He removes your mask delicately, watching as you drop your chin to the ground to avoid his scrutiny, his grin widens. “And may I kiss you?”

You gasp in consternation at this request, and suddenly look up. “Why?”

The prince raises a brow in incredulity; “Isn’t this what troublemakers do, alone in the dark with the festival’s most beautiful woman?”

“Oh, you’re only teasing me again, Sir!” He laughs at your retort, tilting your head back with a hand while the other finds a spot between your hips on your back.

“I promise I’m not, y/n…”  You shiver at the touch and he must notice because his eyes drop to your mouth. “And it is just Jaebum for tonight...”

“Jaebum,” you murmur despite yourself and he smiles, flashing his pearly white teeth. You’ve already gone this far. Might as well transgress all rules, the magic of the masquerade only lasts for one night. “Are you going to kiss me now, Jaebum?”

Before you can even acknowledge what you just dared to ask, the prince presses his lips on yours. The embrace is soft and brief, barely there before it’s gone, and you heave when he pulls back. This is going to hurt when reality hits, but you don’t care. After assessing your reaction, Jaebum is kissing you again. This time with more urgency and hunger than you can handle. Your knees betray you, but he keeps you up with his body thanks to the wall, careful not to crush you. His mouth teases yours skillfully, forcing you to give back just as much. Your hands slide to his shoulders and hair, messing up his neat presentation but his do the same, and none of you seems to mind. Jaebum nibbles at your lower lip, requesting access to your mouth and you comply, unable to resist him any longer.

He could make you agree to anything tonight and although he seems well aware of this power, he’s the one who pulls back. The prince presses his forehead to yours, breathing heavily. You stay like that for infinity, in silence since you can’t form a coherent sentence and he seems similarly affected.

Jaebum sighs, “I believe you were really really wrong earlier.” Suddenly apprehensive, you open your eyes to find him gazing at you heavily. “I don’t think the masquerade has anything to do with my behaviour at all.” You can’t help your uncomfortable laugh and he nudges his nose against yours, palm rubbing small circles on your lower back to reassure you. “I’m being serious, we have a problem...” His hand presses you into him and you link your arms behind his neck to keep close. Again, you’ve totally lost it.

“What is it?” You’re pretty sure you will be having bigger problems than him when you wake up tomorrow. It’s not like you’ll be able to move on from the prince easily.

“I’m not a one-night hooligan,” he whispers, a smile in his voice, “I must have been born for this.”

“What do you m-” Jaebum pecks your lips and rolls his eyes back, effectively shutting you up.

“I plan on misbehaving very often from now on,” he bites his swollen lips, observing your reaction. There’s a hint of worry in his eyes. “That is... Only if you’ll have me, Miss y/n…”

GOT7 | M.list

[n7punk]

im gonna rewatch the he-man/she-ra movie for the first time since i was a little kid so lets see how it holds up lol. liveblogging a bit under the cut

umm i know i never paid any attention to he-man because i was a baby lesbian but how did i forget this awful tiger companion of his

also side note but i love that the sorceress has a door in her house she cant open and doesnt know where it goes.

i dont miss 80s cartoons dear god animation has come so far

holy shit is that bow hes dressed like bow. dear god if you’ve never seen 80s bow please google him right now. again i literally did not look at the men in this show no matter how many times i watched it.

shadow weavers 80 voice.... CATRA im losing my mind. now i know why i barely remember 80s catra theres no way i understood a single word she said.

oh the 80s when a kids cartoon could say the phrase “pussy cat”.

literally how did i forget about this giant tiger mount. i truly did not and still do not care about men sgfdfdg honestly im iconic.

i love how almost all of razz’s spells start with “razzle dazzle” and in spop thats just what she shouts before hitting someone with her broom.

80s eyebrows are. causing me real pain in 2020.

oh fuck yeah swift wind. i loved swift wind as a kid i had a little unicorn that kind of looked like him.

man i could really use a willpower haze right about now.

i love how they were like what will we name their homeworld? how about eternia. oh cool what should we name the planet they took adora to? eh add a letter and take another out. no one will notice. etheria’s fine.

“quick lets cross swords” shut the fuck up he-man hsfhdj

“she’s magnificent” she-ra was a lesbian even in the 80s yall

i love how shadow weaver looks extremely similar to the reboot but with boobs

hey i just watched hordak shapeshift into a fucking rocket what was this show even

it just occurred to me that adam is a fucking prince who runs around in tights and a furry loin cloth while his parents wear normal ass fantasy clothes.

ok and then hordak shapeshifted into a drill. what the ever loving fuck.

oh shit i just realized some of the phrases id use when playing hero with my dolls came straight from this show oops.

skeletor just called the king “you royal boob” dsgfhsdgfhj

“a female he-man... this is the worst day of my life!”  yeah that’s what all the bros said at the time too probably.

i honestly cant tell if adora’s pupils are supposed to be hearts or the show is just that pixelated.

how is this movie still going. i mean i know its an hour and a half but its had like 7 different plots at this point.

this show is really bad (by modern day standards) but it still gives me goosebumps at random times that dont even make sense because like. idk i just loved it a lot as a kid.

i literally remember exactly 0 about he-man’s powers but it seems like she-ra has a lot more than he-man because he keeps being surprised by what she can do. love that for her. also i literally didn’t remember their swords being different (because i dont remember he-man lol) but i wonder why her’s has a power crystal (that maybe grants her the extra powers? idk).

i don’t think i literally ever watched the he-man show my only exposure to him was through the movie and when he appeared on she-ra.

ok movie’s over that was a lot of fun. don’t know if i would super recommend to anyone who never watched the shows but if you love spop its kind of a fun ride to see the source material

[cloudywithachanceofwatering]

Plance au where it hurt

I warned you . I really warned you .

Also , the ending is rushed . Sorry , my patience is low . I truly am a failure .

Edit : maybe it wont hurt so bad

Plaance god tier au where pidge and lance hooked up in the club and pidge got preggers . Unfortunately , the child died under mysterious circumstances during the third trimester . Lance had been with her the whole time , so he tried his best to comfort her even when she pushed him away .

The next year , lance left to pursue his career in the garrison in hopes to forget his pain . Pidge had left to recooperate , unsucessfully . She ended up avoiding meds and fell into anxiety and depression . They avoided each others interactions because they felt like they were the reason the child died .

The following year , lance and pidge had met in the same club again . This time , they were drunk enough to hook up again for real sad sex . A lot of tears and love , but in the end it was a one night stand . The next morning , lance left the motel without telling her . He didnt want to hurt her any more than he already did .

After realizing she was pregnant after a month , pidge hit the road with little to nothing . All she had was ten thousand dollars from stashing money for her baby , most of which her parents and brother had given. Pidge decided to get a cheap van from the scrapyard , got a liscence for the car , ditched everything she had inside and with her little driving skills , went off to somewhere she didnt know . All she really had was a driving liscence to prove her identity . She hid it away .

In the end , she only had a five thousand left . Yes , this was a time where everything wasnt real . This is a fic . Do not take things too seriously .

She literally disappeared overnight - nobody really knew where she went . All they had was a bought cheap van to go off on . How far couldve she went , people asked . Shes just a child , everyone said , unable to find her within a twenty mile radius the next day .

Pidge had driven for days , trying to get to the rural countryside as fast as possible . She found a little village after being lost for hours on end on a obscure forest path - and decided she was going to stay .

The villagers immediately noticed her van . Soon , a crowd formed and when she stepped out of the van , they crowded around her like scavengers looking for prey . They spoke in french , oddly enough - a mix of it . Italian , french , spanish was what she heard all at once .

A red hair girl put up her fist , silencing the villagers . " Hello , " she spoke in french . " Can i have a house ? " " No , " the red haired girl said . " The only house left are in the fields . It is dilapitated . " " Then can i have it ? " The villagers thought about it , buzzing even louder for a while . " Yes . We can help you fix it , " pidge heard from a few people at the front . It seemed to be agreed .

The villagers buzzed around for a bit , discussing their next move . Eventually , they asked a old lady to take her in while they went to look for items to fix up the house with . The red haired girl , with a thick french accent , told her in english : " We will help you . Come with her , she will feed you . "

And oddly enough , it felt like home . Their hospitality - it mustve come from a lack of visitors and her odd way of entering , their curiousity - but pidge was too tired and hungry to be cautious . It was the best human interaction she had for days . The red haired girl proceeded to bring out her items for two guys to take int othe home of the old woman .

The old woman , she was called " old rosa , " had no name . So she took in the name old rosa . She could speak english fluently , although she tripped over her words a bit . " My dear , come and eat , the villagers will help bring in your items . I suppose theyll make your van a bit more hospitable for you . " " Where are you from ? You speak english quite well , " pidge had asked . " Britain , my dear . Although i dont know where . But i do have a postcard with a picture - me and my parents . Everyone says it is a place in Britain , the english folks did . It was a baby me . But now , i cannot remember for the life of me where i am from , my name , my everything . The villagers , they took me in . Incredibly kind of them , " old rosa told pidge fondly .

" Why have you come ? " she had asked pidge . " Because i am pregnant , and to run away , because my relatives will speak to me unkindly if they knew , and i did not want to disappoint my parents and everyone around me again , " pidge sighed . She crossed her arms , unsure if she made a good decision or not telling her . Old rosa simply smiled , wrinkles becoming even more prominent . " I have a child myself - she has a baby boy . She can help you , if you want . The doctor is her husband . They can help you , but they might get a bit too excited about a new baby , " old rosa laughed . Pidge giggled , despairingly remembering what lance said about her giggles and laughs . How cute and bell-tinkly they were .

Oh , how she wished he was here to help her , but only the crevices of her mind said . She had long pushed him away , for the sake of her sanity . Her eyes welled up a bit nonetheless , and she gently thumbed over her stomach . That day , she had woke up alone and cold - perhaos it was for the best . At least you didnt pay for the motel room , a tiny thought sparked . It didnt help much , but a shimmer of hope tugged at her heart . Maybe she could pull through , with or without lance .

Old rosa present a bowl of rice and two poached eggs inside . " I really couldnt do much - i just wanted to make something quick for you my dear . Besides , the resources man hasnt arrived yet . On sunday he will , and on sunday we can go visit him for food . Yes , we are self-sufficient , but the doctor needs items . The resources man is very kind . He gives us what we need for free . I think the government set aside money for us - very kind of them . "

Pidge quickly came to realize her chatter as she ate . She smiled , breaking the poached egg and deciding to mix it with her rice . Old rosa just kept smiling , talking on and on about everything . It felt so nice - like her brother and mother fussing over every little thing that happened to pidge every day .

Another flicker of sadness - how lonely she was . If only she had her family , her lance - no , not her lance . He was just a little crush . That is all . But homesickness struck - how far away was she from her family ? It was selfish of her to leave .

The red haired girl came back in . She spoke in their mixed language - " The van , we tried to make it more homely , rearranged items but kept in sight . You do not have much , so we gave you some blankets and a mattress and pillows and clothes . "

Yes , this wasnt home , but pidge could deal with it .

As the year went by , pidge quickly upholstered her van-home into a much homier place . She made a few good friends . Connor , the fabrics person , he was incredibly kind and sweet , came over often to check on her and drown her in soft wools and cashmeres of all colours . He felt oddly motherlike , perhaps because of his feminine preferances . Old rosa became increasingly motherlike too , taking more and more care of her . The red haired girl , osara , she made sure pidge had priority to make sire the baby would be safe , along with her .

Old rosas daughter , maybellina [ yes , maybelline the makeup brand however you spelled it played a part in this ] , was very kind and loving , like her mother . Her husband , tom , made sure she had checkups every now and then , sometimes popping over randomly to check on her .

Sometimes she would visit connor - he had a huge old castle as a house , his family hadi t for generations . Although he was lonely as the only one , it was fine by him . They were walking up a whole lot of stairs to his sewing and looming room thing , when he had abruptly asked : " Pidge , i was wondering , do you know someone called katie holt ? You come from somewhere else , right ? I have told you before , i study at the garrison . Someone called katie holt , she had disappeared . I heard her parents , her brother and his boyfriend , they have been searching endlessly . They do not know where to find her anymore , " connor said . Oops , yikers ! Haha , no good . Thats all pidges mind provided before shutting off .

So she just stared at him blankly , before connor being the huge softie he is , started blushing and buried his face into her hair , murmuring something along the lines of " im too soft for this . "

And that , my friends , is how the start of something more than a friendship begin . Perhaps pidges mind shutting off helped .

_______________________________________

Lance had firstly , freaked out after pidge went missing and secondly , spent his weekends trying to find clues of her anywhere . So when connor , the nice guy [ actually nice ] asked him what he was doing in the middle of class , he decided to just spill the beans for the sake of his sanity and his already sad heart . " She used to go by the name of pidge . Pidge gunderson . Shes the fu-ing cutest girl youll ever see , " lance had ended . Yes , he self censored himself . Connor was still pure .

Oddly enough , connors eyes seem to be interest at the name of pidge . And even more weirder , he asked lance to be his teammate for this science project on fabric tendancies . The garrison is weird , dont question it . So connor invited him to his home , which worked out well cause all weekend lance just went pidge mode . And he decided to pry more cause he seemed to know a bit .

So that weekend , he saw a girl with long hair that vaguely looked like katie holt . " This is a pidge i know , " connor said . And oh fuck , it clicked in his head - connor's brain shut off after realizing what he did .

Pidge had changed - her hair became longer , more fluffy . Lighter coloured too , from spending time outside . And the most prominent change - she had a baby . With curly blonde hair . And blue eyes .

In lances mind , he couldnt fathom why he had ever decided to leave the motel room anymore . And neither did pidge .

_________________________________________

In the end , everything ended with a flurry of kisses and love , before night struck , and the next morning lance had left again . He had to go to school , which was logical of him . So she didnt put it against him , just helped him get ready and said bye at the door , albeit sadly .

_________________________________________

The years went by . Her little dilapitated house was finally put together . What little she had , pidge tried to make the best of it . She slept with her two children to keep them warm .

Yep , child uno numbero two . I dont know spanish , sorry . I am trying my best on duolingo , though .

Connor still checked up on her , lance still asked about her . He was like the middleman . Poor guy had a affinity for both of them .

One day , lance showed up randomly with a nice suit and a sexy , sleek black car . " Pidge , your parents . They are trying to pry anything about you from me and connors cold , dead hands . Just go back to them , please . Im sorry i didnt have the heart to come visit . "

For whatever reason , it sounded so halfhearted for both of them . Maybe because lance didnt want to make her leave her home and talk to her about it . And they both knew it .

Pidge , she felt hostile .

So she made sure her children never spoke to him if he came .

The next time , he tried to coax her to leave with him to go home . Not happening .

The third time , lance got hella pissed , and started packing up their things . " Lance , why are you doing this ? I dont want to go back . "

And lance softened . " Because i want to take care of you . I finally found you , finally get to see my children , and i finally have money to take care of my family . "

Pidge dragged him out . " Ill consider it . "

_______________________________________

The next time he visited , pidge was ready to leave . " Ive said my goodbyes , said ill come visit . Dont let me down . "

The first thing they did was pack up her items . Put it in her old refurbished van , and while pidge drove his car , and lance drove her old van .

They went to the village , said one last goodbye , and with heavy hearts left . But something inside of pidge lightened . She was finally going home .

__________________________________________

Osara , old rosa , maybellina , tom , connor , they all came to visit pidge and lance when they got married . Their children - samantha for the older curly blonde and girasol for the younger straight black haired - were the little bridesmaids . How cute .

When matt and shiro got married , everyone came back again to celebrate .

Years went by . The village finally got internet , so lance and pidge got the occasional call , and called here and there . Connor and pidge and lance were still as close and cutesy as ever . They visited the village , watched it grow and expand . Helped pidges old friends out . They dragged connor out of a abusive marriage that firstly , left him with seven children , and secondly , a lot of freedom .

And life was nice . Even though pidges family were heavy pissed , they got over it within minutes and only had love left . Even when times got rough with connor when his family was slowly falling apart because of his wife , he managed to kick her out . Very nice .

And a lot nice things happened that lead them to a nice little marriage again , with a epic threesome . Yay for me wanting fluff ! Yay for connor , poor guy !

Fin

__________________________________________

I warned you , the ending was rushed .

Heres the original draft [ read for loss of braincells ] :

DURING HIGH SCHOOL LANCE AND PIDGE DID THE DEED , PIDGE GOT PREGGERS , LANCE SAID BYE AND SO PIDGE ENDED UP MOVING TO A RURAL AREA CAUSE SHE WAS SCARED HER FAM WOULD FYCKING HATE HER DUMBASS SO SHE PACKS UP AND GETS MONEY FROM WHEREVER SHE KNOWS OF AND THEN SHE JUST TAKES A BUS RIDE FAR FAR AWAY SOMEWHERE SO SHE COULD SAVE MONRY AND BE SELF SUFFICIENT IN A RURAL SHITHOLE AND ALL SO SHE LIVES IN A SHITTY DILAPITATED COTTAGE WITH HER KID WITH VIRTUALLY NOTHING LILE LITERALLY NOTHING ALL THE CLOTHES SHE HAS ITS FROM DUMPSTERS IN THE CITY AND THERES ONE FUCKING MATTRESS IN THE ONE ROOM AND LIKE A TABLE WITH TWO CHAIRS THATS IT BUT PIDGE SOMEHOW MANAGES TO WEASEL MONEY INTO HER FAMILY AND ALL AND ONE DAY LANCEP ULLS UP YEARS AFTER IN A FANCY FUCKING CAR AND SAYS HEY SORRY SHES LIKE NO FUCK YOU BUT LANCE COMES BACK THE SECOND TIME AND PIDGES LIKE KID DONT COME OUT IF THUS CUNT COMES BUT EVENT7ALLY THE THIRD TIME HE WRANGLES HER INTO HIS CAR BY LITERALLY TAKING THEIR SHIT AND SAYING YOURE MOVING AND HE ASKS HER KID TO FOLLOW HIM AND THE DUMBASS KIDS LIKE UH MOM LOL OK SO THEN PIDGES LIEK WHAT THE FUCK AND HE FORCES THEM TO HIS HOUSE SO THEY CAN LIVE A BETTER LIFE AND HIS KID WONT BE FUCKING UNEDUCATED AND UNVAXXED AND EVERYTHING AND HE CAN ACTUALLY MAKE IT UP TO PIDGE AND THAT PIDGE CAN GO HOME TO HER FAMILY SO PIDGES LIKE WHY AND HOW THE FUCK DID YOU FIND ME AND LANCE JUST SAYS HE SPENT FUCKING YEARS GOING FULL ON SHERLOCK HOLMES TO FIND HER DEADASS SO BECAUSE HER KID LIKES LANCE SHES LIKE FUCK OK SO EVENTUALLY THEY KISS KISS FALL IN LOVE BAM END YAAAAS

HWEN I SAID GOD AU I MEANT IT THIS HAS BEEN IN MY HEAD FOR MO N T H A

ANYWAY ELABORATING ON KISS KISS FALL IN LOVE HE GETS THEM A EPIC NICE HOUSE AND NEW CLOTHES AND SHIT AND CHECKS ON PIDGE AND HER KID EVERY FIVE SECONDS TO MAKE SURE THEYRE OKAT AND HE PLAYS WITH PIDGES KID EVEN WHEN HE HAS LITERALLY NO TIME LIKE HES WEARING FANCY CLOTHES AND HAS A CONFERNECE AT 3PM BUT ITS 255 AND HES STILL PLAYING WITH HER KID NADP IDGE HAS TO FORCE HIS DUMBASD TO LEAVE AND DO THE MONRY MONEY SO PIDGES LIKE HEY KID DO YOU LIKE PLAYING WITH HIM HAHA HES YOUR FUCKING DAD AND SHES LIKE WOOOAAAHHHH CAUSE SHES A DUMBASS KID SO DUMB KID LOVES LANCE RVEN MORE AND PIDGES LIKE I TILD HER YOURE HER DAD OKAY ILL GO COOK POTATOES NOW AND LANCE IS HAPPY HAPPY SO AFTER THE HAPPY HAPPY LANCE GOES INTO THE GUEST ROOM TO TALK TO PISGE CAUSE THATS HER HOME NOW AND THEY JUST DECIDE TO PUT AWAY THEIR UNDERLYING ISSIES FOR THEIR KID AND BECAUSE SEX MAKES EVERYTHING BETTER THEY HAVE SEX AND WOW LOOK PIDGES PREGNANT AGAIN FOR FUCKS SAKE SO LANCE TAKES CARE OF PIDGE LEGIT NOW AND GETS PIDGE A FUTURE JOB AFTER SHES DONE WITH CHILD OUT AND ALL SO ITS ANOTHER DUMB KID WHOOPIE WOWOWOWOWWO WHO FUCKING KNEW SO NOW HER FIRST KIDS LIKE TWO YEARS OLD BECAUSE THE ORIGINAL KID THAT SHE AND LANCE FUCKED WAS DEAD YEAH IT DIED BUT SHE WENT TO A CLUB AND FUCKED DRUNK LANCE AGAIN AND LEFT OR SOMETHING GOD ONOWS WHAT HAPPENED CAUSE LANCE SURE AS HELL DOESNT SO NOW PIDGE IS LIKE OH MAYBE HE ISNT A SHITBAG AND LANCES LIKE HEY HOT MARRY ME AND SHES LIKE LOL OK SO THEY KISSED KISSED FALLED IN LOVED

[honeymoon-bear]

ALRIGHT SO

i have a ton of opinions i wanna share on each of the characters and i guess i will do that with this post!! id love to hear other peoples opinions as well tho so if you have any you wanna write down dont be shy 👀 

ill put this under a cut cause this is gonna be LON G

alright so!!! 

Taako: honestly a very complex and complicated character? Although he’s arguably one of my two absolute favs from the show, i dont agree with all of his actions while 100% understanding others. Justin actually keeps reminding us that Taako isnt a hero, isnt a good person which is good cause i tend to forget that a lot :^)) its hard to not see people as either good or bad and i think taako is a fantastic character to highlight this grey area. He has very strict priorities which are easy to understand once you know his past. What may seem out of character sometimes is actually just. taako and his different priorities. And thats very interesting to me? Like being able to have a character that does good while being conscious of the bad things theyve done and still do, while knowing theyre not a hero makes them very human in my eyes and thats what i appreciate about him the most. Also: hes just super fun!!! his iconic quotes really add to the show and so does his very non-heroic behaviour. it especially contradicts nicely with magnus’ personality while not making their friendship suffer!! Magnus: just a through and through good guy!!!! i love him!!! hes way more of a black-or-white character (100% lawful good) which isnt a bad thing per se, cause he still has complexity and depth to him. While im usually not a big fan of the whole “oh i lost someone i loved and thats what defines my whole life” trope, Magnus’ backstory doesnt feel like that at all. Maybe because I know its very much inspired by Travis’ mother which is also why i wanna be very careful about this topic cause god, what happened is an awful awful thing. But also cause Julia isnt just “the wife”, she’s a fantastic character in herself and thats what sets this backstory apart from most others of this kind ive seen. Magnus has more to him than just that tho and i think his friendship with Carey is especially outstanding to me!!! Its just so refreshing to see a friendship develop “””on-screen””” and this friendship having no ulterior motive!! they just really like each other platonically!!! hell yeah!!! But what i like about him the most is probably that while his looks may be the most “conservative” out of all the main characters with him being this big and burly and masculine fighter, he’s so caring and loving and compassionate. And thats just such a nice twist?  Lup: I love Lup. She is complex, has understandable motives and relationships and all in all is just a really good addition to the crew!!! Still, i think what made all of that suffer a little bit was her introduction to the show? I dont know, i wish we would have known she was there all along, cause just going “oops taako had a twin sister the whole time!!” was a bit?? sudden?? Also a weird thing for Justin I guess? Cause it interfered greatly with Taakos backstory and who Taakos was as a person. ALTHOUGH like Justin said, nothing really changed actually! I didnt change how Taako behaved or how he got to where he is, so thats all good i guess!! Back to her introduction: there was the whole umbrastaff spelling out her name of course, and the revelation was epic and i enjoyed it, but,,, idk!! it just felt like a shame that such a fantastic character was only added so late into the show through such a “”clicheed””” introduction idk!!! ANYWAY im super glad she’s here now!! Also, she really balances out taako (and the other way around) while not being a copy of him. Like, Im very glad shes not just Taako 2 while still having some of the same mannerisms, it sets them apart without setting them apart too much? She’s witty and confident and for a few episodes i was really scared she was just gonna be a manic pixie dream girl -like character for taako and barry hhh,, cause thats just how most pop media handles good female characters :^)) once again: really glad that didnt happen and Griffin let her be her own person with problems and worries and dreams and relationships of her own. i love her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (kinda wish we knew more about her as a person and not just what she means to other people tho yknow??) Lucretia: Probably my other fav character from balance, and like Taako a very complex and complicated person (you can see a pattern here huh sdjskdj). In my opinion, she’s maybe even the best developed NPC, with a character growth unrivaled by any other character on the show. Her action of deleting everyones memories is such a grey area move but one thats just so understandable and human? She saw how much her friends suffered and couldnt take it anymore, so like Travis i very much think shes a tragic hero, not a villain. The isolation she went through following this decision was a sacrifice she willingly took to just see her friends happy again and i actually think thats very noble? She even stopped the war on earth around the relics that would have otherwise destroyed the whole planet. Still, making everyone forget lup wasnt. the nicest thing to do :^)) especially cause lup sacrificed so much to get to the point where the 7 had finally accomplished their mission of hiding the light, cause yeah, lucretias plan for that would have been fatal and while lups plan wasnt perfect, at least it meant life could continue on the planet below. So i can very much understand Taakos dislike of Lucretia now that he knows the whole picture. All in all tho, Lucretia is a fanastically written character, incredibly human in her actions and someone who put the happiness of her friends and the world below above all of her own needs. She’s a strong leader and has a heart of gold!!!!!!

[amozon28]

review under the cut

He’s trying to place her face in his memory but everything’s just… fffft. Gone. Blank.

how concerning must this be like, forgetting someones name or eye color is pretty normal. but forgetting what they look like entirely must be the most bizzare feelng. not to mentioned coupled with his growing anxiety about whether or not hell be able to find her again without this information

i like brad

“I gotcha,” the guard captain says with a wink, “’Don’t’ send horsemen after her.”

“Did you just–Brad–don’t–no. I said no. No winks. Don’t send any guards after her, I’ll look psychotic.”

“Eh. Little late for that.” Brad the guard captain shrugs.

i REALLY like brad lol XD. if it wasnt for the perfectly reasonable magical explanation for the night Brad would be very valid is his assumptions that cindy is SUS.

“Or maybe she needs to reach a drop off point for whatever she’s stolen.”

“You don’t know if anything’s missing!”

“Not yet, we don’t.”

“Ig-ignore that. Don’t tell my dad I said that,” the prince pinches the bridge of his nose, “Brad I swear to god, don’t tell my dad I said that. I was panicking and–and–You know how weird he gets about this stuff.”

the prince totally wanting the earth beneath his feet to swallow him up at that moment. also relatable when u say something super embarrassing like, pls dont look at me rn. i do find it a bit amusing in the “apple doesnt fall far from the tree” kind of way what the prince says his dad gets weird about lovey stuff like this as if he didnt just admit to falling inlove with a girl he just met. its a family of romantics.

i do really like how casual the prince talks with brad and presumably most of his staff. as it feels natural for him to be on a more casual base with them if he doesnt get out much and makes friends with his staff. u cant maintain a level of propriety with ur staff if their also ur friends. also brad making more “idk dude shes sus” comments is funny

“Love of your life, huh?”

“I dunno… she makes clothes for rats. She’s funny. I like her.”

“..Your Highness, did she slip anything into your drink?”

ok this next part isnt review this is straight up me just theorizing what is going to happen later in the story so if im wrong pls just ignore this. so like in keeping with the tale the prince doesnt go door to door with the shoe trying on adventure as he isnt allowed bc of his station but he trusts brad with it. and brad who doesnt 100% trust this mystery goes along to see if theres anything else more nefarious going on. so after many many MANY ladies have tried on the shoe they get to the bottom of the list includin the worse household. if it werent for the royal decree he prob wouldve skipped this house because theres no way that any of the spoiled, prissy, awful ppl in this house would be able to be so polite and charming to win over the prince. so hes very much going thu the motions and not paying attention, bc no way the shoe is fitting, and its because hes not really paying attention that he sees a rat in the corner. now seeing a rat in someones home isnt unheard of especially on a property with farm animals,and  rat traps arent like we have in modern times. However what is note worthy is that this rat is wearing a cute lil outfit.

“I dunno… she makes clothes for rats. She’s funny. I like her.”

so he asks lady tremaine again if there are any other eligible ladys in the home, and she gives the same answer is her sickenly sweet voice. and hes just like hmmmmmmmm shes hiding something. and they search the home and oop theres a lock door, and there she is! the mice did help her escape, in a way

oop i didnt mean to write like a mini fic in this review pls ignore ignore.

“You know you’re really not supposed to be moving at full speed when the spell comes undone…” the fairy godmother bites her thumbnail.

hahaha i remember as a kid watching the movie and expecting the spell to end in a huge bang bc they were going full speed but instead when the scene cuts back to them cinderella is just, sitting on the pumpkin and everything just stopped and kid me was like :/ ok. so this was very validation for kid me haha.

and the fairy godmother bitting her nail like shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit im already in so much fairy trouble what happens if u accidentally kill the kid ur suposed to godmother?????

“Oh GOD why did I eat so much?!” Cinderella manages before puking again,

hmmmm yeah rollercoaster ride mixed with highadrenaline and full stomach do NOT mix well.

“It’s stupid but…” she sighs, “I think I was scared of them taking it away.”

hnnnnn just fucking rip my heart out. im not the first person to say this, that ppl try to “fix”  cinderella in retellings by making her a girlboss or making the story more feminist, that they ignore the fact that cinderella is a victim of abuse. shes actively living in an abusive home, in poor condition with no support. we only see a snippet in the movie but that scene of the dress ripping, and how casually it was done, just shows how comfortable the family was in treating her that way. so cinderella having things like food insecurities is so heartbreaking and realistic. as happy as i am for her to get out of that situation, i know that behavior like this is likely going to follow her at the castle until she can relearn what its like to live in a home you feel SAFE in.

“Welp. I guess it’s not a magical night unless you run from the cops at least once,” the Fairy Godmother shrugs.

whether intentional or not i love how the godmother kind of talks out of time compared to everyone else. it makes her feel more unreal to everything else, like she doesnt fit. (in a good way)

genuinely funny line got a chuckle outta me

now I’ve caused an international incident?? Or something??”

“Nah, he’s in your country, so it’s just a national incident,”

“Ooh! Did you slap him?

when i first read this line my brain autocorrected this to “ooh! did you slap his butt?”

He’s kind of shy but he like… tries to play it off, you know? And he’s such a good dancer–like, he made me look like I knew what I was doing, and I really didn’t– And when he laughs he–”

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. ok but social butterfly cinderella finally able to break out of her shell and her kind of shy wall flower husband you happily tags along. and the dancing part, so accurate, i have some dance experience, but dancing with someone who KNOWS what they are doing can make you look like youve been dancing all ur life effortlessly. but not anyone can just do that they have to be a good lead. (side tangent of right i was reviewing)

I asked some other fairies for help but and that’s how I got to godmother status but uh… there were some misunderstandings and technically I’m still on probation

lol againt with the modern language, also remembers the addition about the godmother having the equivalent of a fairy ankle moniter this whole time because she wants to create chaos on those that hurt cindy XD

awwwwwwww. and cindy just being so appreciative of having her one night out, not hoping for anything more, its kind of sad. because while i know she gets her happy ending, cindy at this point doesnt. so shes just kind of content/resigned to returning to her old miserable life, because at least she had this one happy night just for herself. its sad

“Even with the crash and the puking and the cops coming after us?”

“Mm-hmm.” Cinderella stoops and kisses her fairy godmother on the cheek.

hi! is there any chance of you writing a series/more snippets around the cinderella telling you posted a bit ago? i really loved it!

Continuing from this post.

---

The prince is sitting on the steps, his eyes aren't quite focused and he's turning over the glass slipper in his hands. What the hell was that? He's trying to place her face in his memory but everything’s just... fffft. Gone. Blank. He remembers what she said. But even the pitch is weird--it could be any voice.

“Your highness?”

The prince glances over his shoulder at the Captain of the Royal Guard.

“Oh--hey---” the prince blinks a few times.

“...awfully odd, that girl,” the Captain folds his arms.

“I--” the prince draws a breath in through his teeth, “ I need to find her.” 

“Understood,”  the captain of the guard nods, “I’ll send guard details on every road leading out of the palace.”

“What?! No--that’s insane! She’s going to think I’m--No, I can’t approve of that...” the Prince is pressing his fingertips to his forehead, his other hand still gripping the slipper.

“I gotcha,” the guard captain says with a wink, “’Don’t’ send horsemen after her.”

“Did you just--Brad--don’t--no. I said no. No winks. Don’t send any guards after her, I’ll look psychotic.”

“Eh. Little late for that.” Brad the guard captain shrugs.

“What?”

“Well she and her whole carriage slipped past security somehow, and she got into the ball without even being announced by the Master of Ceremonies. That’s a security risk. And she seemed suspiciously chummy with the waitstaff. And if she ditched the party in this much of a hurry, she might’ve taken state secrets or something. So, obviously, I sent the horsemen...” he checks his pocket watch, “3 minutes ago.”

Keep reading

[thedappleddragon]

I think this year I really do wanna try to write about what I did throughout the day like I did with my quarantine diary, but without the pressure of having to do it Every Singe Day. 

I continued sewing the paws I started yesterday until I got frustrated with the pattern and quit after several hours. last night I was watching youtube while working, but I kept pausing every time I used my sewing machine and forgetting to unpause sometimes so I'd be working in silence singing the same 2 verses of a sea shanty stuck in my head until I played it again. but today I discovered that if I just wear my headphones with a podcast playing, I can still hear it over the machine noise and I don't have to worry about pausing/unpausing/carrying my phone around so I can hear it :) I watched the first few episodes of TAZ that way and it made me think about how different TAZ and critical roll are lmao. speaking of dnd I found my folder of character sheets a couple days ago (?) and today my dm friend suggested we start playing again after a SUPER long hiatus. like MONTHS. I may need to rebuild my character from the ground up since I dont really know what the fuck im doing, but ill leave that for another time. I keep getting too many ideas for dnd builds lol. ANYWAY after temporarily giving up on the paws I hung around my kitchen and watched tiktoks in my room and got sad for a little bit until I booted up the sims 4. I've been playing with a could sims that have grown into a little family, Athena Harmonson the crime boss and Rosalai (idk how its spelt lmao) Underwood the comedian had their first daughter Liliana Harmwood and recently had TWINS Theo and Reneigh (idk if that's how its spelled either) Harmwood. All the names were randomized except for my combining of the two last names for the kids so idk how exactly they're spelling. I played for a few hours and I think I may need to move them into a bigger house. there was hardly room for Liliana as a kid (she didnt even have her own room, I just shoved her bed in a little alcove and gave her her own little corner) so idk how im gonna handle her as a teen plus two almost toddlers. and I made myself sad thinking about how Athena and Rosalai(?) are gonna die eventually and all the time I spent upping their skills and completing whims and moving them through their careers won't matter :( I guess I could use whatever lifetime reward points are called in this game to keep them as immortal adults but that would get hard as the family expands more and more. eh I'll figure it out. on another related note im pretty sure the fans in my MacBook are fuckng broken lol. I remember one day they were REALY loud and I just kinda. smacked my laptop a little bit to make the non-stop high pitched whirring stop and then I think they went back to normal? but now the dont fuckin work at all. there's never a breeze coming through the vents and it gets super hot so I keep it propped up on a box when I play instead of resting on my blankets to try and prevent excess heat trapping. I COULD get it fixed, or I could just ignore it until I eventually get a better laptop. of wait until I hear word from my brother about my other broken laptop that he gave to me but then it stopped charging for unknown reasons. idk. I think I maybe have bad luck with technology. or at least laptops specifically. but uhhhh anyway one been typing for way too long and none’s gonna read this which is totally fine by me because this is mostly to act as a personal archive anyway. but I do hope I'm able to write at least a little bit throughout the year about how my day goes to what im thinking about most days, because one of my fears is just forgetting who I am and what ive done and just letting time disappear and losing myself along with it. actually yeah I think thats like my greatest fear oops. anyway goodnight I love you mwah <3

[demonialex]

1-100 😘

omfg ok under the cut cuz yeah long af

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? Spotify!

is your room messy or clean? uhhh it’s in the middle i guess lmao a little messy but not complete chaos imo?

what color are your eyes? dark brown

do you like your name? why? i hate my given name so instead i named myself alex and now i rly like it ay B) 

what is your relationship status? single

describe your personality in 3 words or less caring, impatient, lazy

what color hair do you have? brown

what kind of car do you drive? color? i dont have a car

where do you shop? uhhhhh i dont really shop much cuz im broke? but sometimes in various stores it depends on what im getting?

how would you describe your style? “i don’t have enough money to dress in the style i actualyl like so this will have to do”

favorite social media account ngl it’s probably this hellsite

what size bed do you have? queen

any siblings? nah, only child

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? hmmmm probably canada? cause they seem rly chill with lgbtq ppl and they are rather safe? plus i speak the language sooo

favorite snapchat filter? ...the dog one (well out of the current ones cuz i rly miss the “greek goddess” or whatever the hell was the name of that one)

favorite makeup brand(s) kinda rly dont care tbh? i kinda of go with whats cheaper lmao and also it varies on what it is (foundation, eye shadow, etc)

how many times a week do you shower? usually every day tho im ngl today i was so exhausted (im super sick) that i forgot to shower

favorite tv show? currently? probably the magicians

shoe size? varies between 7~8 US

how tall are you? 162cm

sandals or sneakers? sneakers

do you go to the gym? ok i tried going this year but then i got drowned in homework and now i have the flu dont judge me

describe your dream date honestly i have no idea? as long as im with someone i actually like and am attracted to, and that the conversation flows, im good.

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? my go-to wallet? 0. my savings wallet? i think around 1k or 1.5k i cant remember for sure? as i said, it’s a /savings/ wallet 

what color socks are you wearing? im not wearing socks

how many pillows do you sleep with? one under my bed and one on each side of me so i can throw my leg over it when i roll

do you have a job? what do you do? nah, not allowed to work ;-; 

how many friends do you have? uhhhhh... 3? 4? idk mate i lost A LOT of friends in the past few years :/ I have quite a few “acquaintances” now and ppl i wish were my friends but who dont seem to want the same, but actual friends i think probably just 4

whats the worst thing you have ever done? depends on who u ask, on ur morals, etc

whats your favorite candle scent? i like too many, i cant pick!! D:

3 favorite boy names guilherme, alex, leonardo ? i guess? idk

3 favorite girl names carolina, camila, alex. again, i guess lmao idk

favorite actor? dont rly have one

favorite actress? again dont rly have one oops im boring

who is your celebrity crush? fck i have way too many tbh

favorite movie? probably DEBS tbh

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book?not rly... it’s not that i dont /want to/ it’s just that i constantly forget to read. my fave is probably little brother or my girlfriend is a geek

money or brains? for myself? money! on a potential partner? brains tho idc that much abt academically smart yadda yadda

do you have a nickname? what is it? Zu

how many times have you been to the hospital? uhhhh for actual important shit and not just casual check ups probably.... 4 or 5 times? i cant remember. i had pneumonia and i fractured bones quite a few times

top 10 favorite songs !!! i cant choose fam

do you take any medications daily?ye anti depressant and anti anxiety

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) always thought it was oily but apparently it’s mixed/combination

what is your biggest fear? ooo boy i have too many fears idk if i can choose a main biggest one

how many kids do you want? none thanks

whats your go to hair style?  “i woke up and was too lazy to brush my hair plus if i dont brush it it looks extra fluffy and slightly curled”

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) small-ish apartment

who is your role model? dont have one tbh

what was the last compliment you received? deadass cant remember

what was the last text you sent? “thank you~”

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? no clue tbh i was still a child haha 

what is your dream car? I rly dont wanna drive tbh but i find lamborghinis so fckin gorgeous

opinion on smoking? idc as long as u dont do it next to me cause it tends to make me cough a lot. tho depend on what ur smoking and the brand and if we are in an open space for some reason i dont smoke so ye

do you go to college? yup!!

what is your dream job? no clue

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? suburbs. the more things to do the better

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? i usually forget but my mom always takes them for me so :^)

do you have freckles? not the standard “a bunch of tiny ones around ur face”, but i have the classic brown ones here and there. does that make sense? :v (i hate that u guys have the same word for both kind of freckles smh)

do you smile for pictures? not usually? at most a close mouthed smile more like a smirk lmao

how many pictures do you have on your phone? i dont wanna do the math but over 1k

have you ever peed in the woods? who hasnt??

do you still watch cartoons? if animes are considered cartoons then sometimes, if not then not really

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? cant remember how the wendy’s ones taste like so i will go with mcdonalds

Favorite dipping sauce? depends on what im eating. usually blue cheese, if not then bbq

what do you wear to bed? depends on how hot it is lol

have you ever won a spelling bee? never even been to one

what are your hobbies? watching tv shows? idk mate

can you draw? kinda i guess

do you play an instrument? nah :(

what was the last concert you saw? i think it was demi lovato lmao

tea or coffee? i dont really drink either tbh. loved the tea my friend made me, and loved the coffee my grandma used to make me. alas both live too far away now

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? i deadass think i only went to dunkin donuts ONCE and i dont remember shit abt it so i will go with starbucks

do you want to get married? hmmm idc either way

what is your crush’s first and last initial? dont rly have a /major/ crush rn, just smol ones

are you going to change your last name when you get married? if their name is cooler maybe

what color looks best on you? black

do you miss anyone right now? i constantly miss too many ppl but i try to avoid thinking abt it

do you sleep with your door open or closed? closed!! i hate sleeping with open doors

do you believe in ghosts? i guess?

what is your biggest pet peeve? idk fam i have too many haha im blanking rn

last person you called` probably my mom or my grandma. i hate calloing ppl so i usually just call them lmao

favorite ice cream flavor? hmm probably half baked from B&J. in general i like peanut, chocolate, vanilla, bubblegum... i have a rly sweet toothe lol

regular oreos or golden oreos? regular!

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? chocolate!! the rainbow ones taste like plastic imo

what shirt are you wearing? it’s not rly a shirt? it’s a.. camisole? i think that’s how u say it? my mom got it for me, it’s from that the despicable movie or whatever it was called

what is your phone background? lock screen is julia wicker, home screen is julia and marina

are you outgoing or shy? generally shy but id depends on who i am with i guess

do you like it when people play with your hair? if i like the person (even as friends, just as long as im comfortable with them) then hell yes i love it! if it’s a stranger or someone i rly dont like then no obvs

do you like your neighbors? i dont rly know them tbh

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? ye usually once when i wake up and once before going to bed.

have you ever been high? nah i was able to take like 2 drags and then i died coughing

have you ever been drunk? nope:( not from lack of trying lol but the taste is so gross it makes me feel a bit nauseous

last thing you ate? bread with requeijao

favorite lyrics right now the lyrics of “trem bala”. deadss considering getting part of it tattooed cause it’s so... deep? and good? and it’s sigh it’s rly good if anyone is interested i can translate is lol 

summer or winter? winter

day or night? night

dark, milk, or white chocolate? white tho milk is a close second

favorite month? hmmm idk? maybe november cause mah bday?

what is your zodiac sign scorpio

who was the last person you cried in front of? i rarely cry and even more rarely cry in front of others so i dont rly remember but if i had to guess probably my mom?

[inkcaviness]

I dare you to answer all the asks for that ask thing u reblogged today. Do it! (just. do. it) XD

(tell feli im gonna fight her)

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? none of these really

is your room messy or clean? messy. very messy

what color are your eyes? mainly blue but. muddy

do you like your name? why? uhh yes. just bc?

what is your relationship status? too busy dying and being dead

describe your personality in 3 words or less: tired, yells, forgetful 

what color hair do you have? brown

what kind of car do you drive? color? uhh an old black bmw

where do you shop? for clothes or…groceries or…what. i dont really usually shop i guess?

how would you describe your style? “i only have one pair of jeans this sweater was on sale. its ugly and i love it”

favorite social media account: like?? my own or someone elses?? im confused so im just gonna ignore this question 

what size bed do you have? small. very small

any siblings? no

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? colorado just bc its nice there

favorite snapchat filter? dont have snapchat

favorite makeup brand(s): uhh i like makeup factory and art deco? but i dont really do enough makeup to like…have a favorite brand…

how many times a week do you shower? uhm. 7. at least…

favorite tv show? gilmore girls

shoe size? 42-43 european size, i think that 9 ½ in america?

how tall are you? 176cm which i think is 5″9?

sandals or sneakers? sneakers 

do you go to the gym? does gym class count 

describe your dream date: probably going to the natural history museum but just bc no one ever wants to go with me. im very excited about natural history museums 

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? like 20ct i think

what color socks are you wearing? one is pink and the other white with yellow dots

how many pillows do you sleep with? one

do you have a job? what do you do? no

how many friends do you have? uhhhh like 10-15 i guess but i never know when you go from being acquaintances to being friends 

whats the worst thing you have ever done? i have done nothing wrong ever but one time i had to pick up the dead and decaying body of a baby cat off the street and that definitely counts as “the worst”

whats your favorite candle scent? all of them 

3 favorite boy names: no

3 favorite girl names: no

favorite actor? george blagden

favorite actress? margot robbie

who is your celebrity crush? dont have one

favorite movie? love actually

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? i dont read as much as i used to and i have too many favorite books, i cant choose one

money or brains? lol money

do you have a nickname? what is it? i have. too many nicknames. jooosten, nougat, parental overlord, hans,…there are…more

how many times have you been to the hospital? twice i think

top 10 favorite songs: im not doing this now

do you take any medications daily? no

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) dry 

what is your biggest fear? murky water

how many kids do you want? none

whats your go to hair style? well i mean. my hairs kina shaved off atm so

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) relatively big

who is your role model? dont have one

what was the last compliment you received? uhhh idk

what was the last text you sent? “you’d know if you knew her”

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? i cant remember ever really believing in santa oops

what is your dream car? i want a rusty pickup truck for The Aesthetics 

opinion on smoking? i really dont like smoking like. youre actively destroying yourself. but if you really have to smoke dont do it around other people, especially not kids, if they cant go away. i guess then you can do whatever you want

do you go to college? no

what is your dream job? haha i dont even have one 

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? i think suburbs bc that way youre not completely in he middle of fuckass nowhere

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? yes

do you have freckles? no

do you smile for pictures? yes

how many pictures do you have on your phone? a lot

have you ever peed in the woods? uhh probably

do you still watch cartoons? yes

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? never been to wendys and honestly i dont really like chicken nuggets

Favorite dipping sauce? mayonnaise i guess

what do you wear to bed? uhh just whatever tshirt and comfy pants i’ve got lying around i guess

have you ever won a spelling bee? no

what are your hobbies? drawing writing and dying

can you draw? ehh yea 

do you play an instrument? no

what was the last concert you saw? none

tea or coffee? tea

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? hhhhhhhhhhhh……….starbucks but thats a tough one

do you want to get married? ergh not particularly 

what is your crush’s first and last initial? honestly idk if i really have a crush right now im kinda mehh about the person i liked bc idk if its even really still a crush and im getting far too caught up with that anyways the initials would be v and k

are you going to change your last name when you get married? honestly that depends on the last name of the person id marry

what color looks best on you? i have no idea. if anyone can answer that question for me feel free to speak up

do you miss anyone right now? not particularly 

do you sleep with your door open or closed? closed

do you believe in ghosts? not really but who knows

what is your biggest pet peeve? lol i have so many i dont even know

last person you called: my dad

favorite ice cream flavor? chocolate 

regular oreos or golden oreos? regular 

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? chocolate

what shirt are you wearing? an aglionby academy shirt lmao

what is your phone background? yurio and otabek 

are you outgoing or shy? shy

do you like it when people play with your hair? yessss

do you like your neighbors? theyre okay

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? yes, both 

have you ever been high? no

have you ever been drunk? not really 

last thing you ate? uhh bread 

favorite lyrics right now: dont really have any 

summer or winter? winter

day or night? night 

dark, milk, or white chocolate? white chocolate

favorite month? december 

what is your zodiac sign. aquarius 

who was the last person you cried in front of? i dont really know, i do my best not to cry in front of people honestly 

this took like 5 years but im done