#the voices are speaking and they're loud
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good pets deserve gentle love.
#the watermark looks UGLYyyy#anyways#is that time of the year#male yandere#yandere oc#yandere#original character#original art#the voices are speaking and they're loud
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Yeah yeah jedi Maul au we've all seen him. But what about senator Maul au. Representing Dathomir, a neutral world like Mandalore that is still somewhat hostile to outsiders. Wearing fancy clothes that show a bit too much skin for the cold climate of Coruscant. Falling in hate at first sight with Padmé, the only other senator who brings a gun to the senate floor "just in case". The two of them having a weird rivalry because Maul doesn't trust the Jedi and is neutral in a lot of subjects that Padmé is a vocal defender of.
#hm i should make an original post tag#maul#darth maul#padmé#<- she gets tagged too because she is very in my thoughts as i imagine this#sorry i watched the phantom menace bonus dvd and all the making of stuff made me Think#i want to put maul in fancy clothes and situations#he still votes with padmé in a lot of stuff btw. he just refuses to defend it out loud#because first of all he has his pride#second of all he's not here to speak for himself like all those selfish old men he's here on behalf of the tribes of dathomir#dathomir would probably have a lot more senators than the average world i think. since the tribes are not all unified#so maul would be like. the talzin clan and/or nightbrothers' senator. possibly the only male in the dathomir delegation#and more connected to the dathomir magics and martial arts than to sith philosophy#he'd probably hate both sith and jedi also. they're both freaks who worry too much about light and dark#also. this is half very similar to thoughts i have about an (unrelated) oc i have so i dont want to put this on the main post but also.#he'd probably have a lot of 'fans' who love him for his voice and looks instead of his politics#and i Knoww padmé has fans too. because she is a fashion icon. and very charismatic#so can you imagine. the hot politician fandom drama.#sorry i love creating stupid imaginary internet drama#this and my obimaul begrudging tumblr mutuals who hate each other au. i love creating virtual Situations#senator maul au
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having ADHD is being in a social event for 2+ hrs and feeling as though you've been awake for three straight days due to the overstimulation . so i can't guarantee replies tonight .
#⚡ ⸺ ❝ moghome . [ ooc ]#i love my family#i HATE social events w my family#they're so loud and everyone talks over each other - actually no YELL over each other and i'm just#my ADHD brain cannot; i'm exhausted and it hurts to speak so my voice is just dragging rn#didn't help my cousin's place is so gd hot so that's another layer of exhaustion thrown in there#sorry ;;;
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just bruce and jason regularly having sex as a way to blow off steam.
#sometimes i just wanna write more simple basic stuff#okay i actually have so many thoughts and ideas about this but its late and my head is killing me#but like they ofc never talk about it#because communication is not their thing lmao#but having sex is a way to just let the frustration out#and say things they cant with words#and talking about it would make it messier#and blablabla#but then one of them start seeing someone else casually#lets say jason but it works for both really#and bruce isnt prepared for the intense jealousy he feels when he sees them together#and the next time they speak bruce’s voice is clipped and flat#jason catches on quickly#and maybe he starts teasing a bit#purposely rubbing it in#they're still having sex though#and bruce wants to meet more often and comes up with excuses#because ofc he can't say out loud that he wants to see jason more and he wants them to be exclusive#he doesnt want jason with anyone else
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I saw a new show on Discovery recently where they have footage and interview survivors of recent weather natural disasters
The second episode features the 2020 derecho that hit Iowa and Illinois (in particular, the city of Cedar Rapids, IA) especially hard
And while the footage is heart wrenching and disturbing at times, there are some classic Midwesterner moments that made me chuckle
Such as one guy, after the roof was ripped off his home by hurricane force winds, being like "oh no my Xbox :("
#there were multiple moments like that#where I chuckled bc it was such a Midwestern way to approach what was happening#oh also that episode had a mom who deserves an AWARD#she was driving with FIVE KIDS in her car when the derecho hit#and she kept a cool head the entire time she was figuring out what to do and where to go#like pieces of buildings were flying across the road and she kept a level tone#only raising her voice when she found a building they could shelter in#and only doing so to instruct the kids to run as fast as they could inside#and even then she wasn't yelling just speaking loud and firm#seriously I'm in awe of her#the show is really good but it's definitely triggering I will say#there's footage of people thinking they're about to die which is. hard to watch.#it's difficult to see people in foxholes like that#but if you can handle that I recommend it#it's called In the Eye of the Storm#speecher speaks
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Was doing some cursory research about low concentration salicylic as an over-the-counter acne treatment (been having a flare-up, likely due to a combo of stress and shifting environmental factors, and since I'm a terrible skin picker I'm trying to find ways to avoid giving myself scarring without needing to visit a doctor) and as I was scrolling through the Wikipedia page I learned from the epidemiology section that acne apparently affects women slightly more than men:
...and I don't know why, but this really struck me.
I guess I grew up with the belief, picked up from the culture and media around me, that acne was this "greasy teenage boy" problem, in some way inherently unfeminine. I didn't really think boys got it more than girls, I figured that was a stereotype, but I kind of assumed the stats were pretty much equal. And back when I still thought I was a girl, I felt worse about my own acne, since it felt like yet another way I was performing girl/womanhood incorrectly.
Finding out it's actually slightly more common in (cis) women is throwing me for a loop, even though it rightly shouldn't be - that's a very neutral and harmless fact! But you never see acne treated as just a feature of a teenage girl's face, it's always something awful that needs to be fixed (never mind that in real life, you often can't "fix" acne completely, can only manage it). That's not to say it's treated as something positive in boys either - usually boys with acne are also treated as undesirable, be that a loveable nerd or just a creepy loser - but I'm not sure I've ever even seen a girl character with even moderate acne (like I had at that age, though it certainly felt severe at the time) on screen.
I took isotretinoin for my acne in school, which is a pretty powerful medication that is highly effective at stopping acne but also comes with some serious risks - I had to take regular blood tests when I was on it to make sure it wasn't killing my liver. Due to my (mentioned before on this blog, lol) massive phobia of all things medical and spiky, I fainted for every single one of these. On top of that, it increased my already very high (I'm about as white as you can get) sensitivity to sun, so I couldn't go out even on cloudy days without suncream. And it causes birth defects, so they kept making me take supervised pregnancy tests "just in case" for months, until I changed dermatologists and the new one was like "what? why? no, you don't have to do those, just sign a thing saying you're not sexually active and it's not our fault if you're lying about that and you're chill".
It was a Lot, is what I'm saying.
Isotretinoin isn't the first port of call for treating acne - my GP tried several topical solutions and two different kinds of antibiotics (one of which I was allergic to, which naturally, me being me, I discovered by fainting about it. Again. in music class, this time) before finally referring me to the dermatologist who was allowed to prescribe me The Serious Drugs. Moreover, I stand by my decision! I wasn't pressured into taking it by family or friends, I was allowed to make my own choices, and going through all that rigmarole was absolutely my choice.
...I might even have taken the same choice if I'd lived in a society without all this weird stuff around acne, to be honest. As mentioned at the top of the post, I have a skin picking problem and acne not only doesn't help with that, it was causing me actual pain.
But also. I don't know. The societal stuff didn't help at all. My dermatologist suggested at the time that insecurity about my acne might be contributing to my chronic neck and upper back pain, of all things (much like the acne, something that started in my teens but hasn't stopped since I left them), since it might be making it harder for me to stand up straight with confidence. I laughed the idea off at the time, but now... I don't know. It could certainly have been a contributing factor.
I wish I had a call to action here, but I don't really know what can be done about this, especially not at the individual level. This is a societal gender discrimination issue, and I guess an ableism issue as well? I wouldn't normally call my acne a disability, but it is certainly a medical condition, and it does affect my life (and acne can certainly be the basis of unconscious discrimination, though I'm very grateful that that hasn't been something I've faced personally). If anyone has any more productive suggestions, feel free to add them onto this post. And I guess, put characters with acne in your stories? Including women, and including adults! 5% is one in twenty. One in every twenty 40+ year old women (according to that cited study, anyway, which I can't currently verify because my institutional access is fucking broken again) still "have problems" with acne. That might be worth representing.
#asdfjklklhhll no idea what to put here#normally i put all my opinions in the tags but this time my opinions are in the post#acne sucks and if i could press a button to remove it from the world entirely tomorrow i probably would#not fair to peoples bodily autonomy i know but also there are very very very few people who WANT to have acne#and i suspect that would be true even without the societal pressure. it's annoying and has basically no upsides#however. it drives me fucking spare the way we barely depict it in stories. and even when we do it's almost always to signify a villain#or the classic “teenage girl gets one (1) pimple and screams loud enough to take the roof off about it'' story which i HATE#it speaks to a very real fear and anxiety teen girls experience about this stuff but#a) does so with very little sympathy to the girls in question. instead potraying them as vain#and b) I'm sorry. you mean to tell me you think teen girls are shocked or horrrified at the concept of a pimple?#even if it's mild they get at least one of those a week. they're not screaming the house down every time it happens they'd lose their voice#they might be super upset about it but it's a much more resigned sort of despair. trust me#...huh i guess i did still have some opinions left#i am the personification of the guy in xkcd 2134 lol#anyway. acne bad. send post
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Poll adventure (paventure? lol) Day 7: read the small story tidbit below the poll for more details, OR just vote based on initial impression
(✦ see past poll results + further information HERE (link) ✦)
The winning option of yesterday's poll was that the adventurer should go on a 5 day journey to find the Innkeeper's weird brother who studies animals, and show him the Suspicious Egg….
~
The next morning he wakes early, buzzing with renewed purpose, and also minor back pain from sleeping on old potato sacks.. After a meager breakfast of more free leftover scraps, the Innkeeper stops him before he leaves, giving him a few extra supplies for the long journey, as she can tell he doesn't have much. He packs up and sets out onto the road once again, crumpled sketchy map in hand...
He has a fairly uneventful journey for the first day - waving at the occasional other travelers as they pass, cleaning his boots in a nearby pond, stopping to eat some dumplings whilst watching the sunset, and finally setting up a small tent a short ways off the main path, resting with his cat by a dim campfire until they both fall asleep......
The second day, however, does not start as smoothly.. Only a few hours further down the road, he's met with a large barricade, guarded by a group of what seems like elven soldiers from one of the larger surrounding cities of the area. Practicing his confidence, he puts on his best "brave face" (which to others, appears more as some sort of pained wince, like he might have something in his eye), shakily striding right up to the authority figures he is definitely not afraid of.
"Halt, traveler! You cannot pass."
He sways slightly, struggling to keep his wobbly legs under control, "OH, y-yEAH, ssorry, I was-, hh, I was just walking, ~o-out for a stroooll~, haha, so I .. uh.. o-okay. That's.. okay. But, uh.. could, can.. euh.. C-can I ask why? like... why the, uh... blocking off.. of ... the um.. the-"
"Unfortunately, we are not at liberty to disclose any information on the nature of this current road closure. Our sole duty is to maintain security of the barrier."
"hhHeh, ye.. eAh, for sure, I-I get that.. Duty is.. really so... important in ... today's world.. gotta, um.. do the duties.. or, uh.. .. yeah, but.. so, uhhh... wh-Do you know.. maybe, uh... H-how long you'll, like... be here? guarding... and such...??"
"We'll be here as long as we need to be here."
"...O-okay.. but, like.. uh... any,,.... time estimate? hahahehhh?? like, uh.. a day, or... two, or um...??"
"This matter does not concern you, traveler. Move along."
"Aoh, yeahgh, I.. totally.. totally.. it, uh.. Well.. but it kind of does though,, right? B-because I do, in fact, actually have to go down that road at some p-point sssoo, um,... uh.. I-"
"I said move along."
The guard abruptly takes a step forward, causing The Adventurer to yelp as if he'd been hit, tripping over his own feet and scrambling off on hands and knees, lunging into bushes near the rocky roadside.. After exchanging a confused glance, the guards both shrug, resuming their stoic positions at the barrier.
The Adventurer watches from the uncomfortable safety of some berry brambles, surveying the area at a distance and desperately trying to work out how he can still get where he's trying to go. The map given to him by the Innkeeper is pretty straightforward, not showing alternate paths. Based on his primary map, he could maybe think of a few detours, but he's anxiously unfamiliar with the area... How should he proceed?
----
Additional Details - (I decided whenever he gets new items or goals or something, I'll list them at the end just to keep track)
items + to inventory (from the Innkeeper): 2 lunchboxes of vegetable dumplings, 2 canteens of water, a box of tea, one rope, 1 pouch of dried meat, 4 candles, a hand-drawn map
main goal: get to the abandoned castle ruins to see the rare animal specialist about the egg
#paventure posting#polls#choose your own adventure#SORRY this took so long. I still want to do this daily or every other day lol. I just had a lot going on the past few days#the story tidbit of this one is slightly longer again because you need spaces to break up dialogue and etc. but much shorter#than the other one still and pretty concise. I tried to leave out a lot of detail and just give the bare minimum again lol#Hopefully his speaking style isn't too grating also ghbjhb.. I'm more familiar with writing dialogue for like.. people to say out loud so#to me I'm always trying to hear it in my head and write eveything exactly how it would be spoken. and to me it sounds fine#if you act it in the exact voice I'm envisioning and have a distinct speaking style where you pause or drag#out words in a specific way - like with particualr cadence and comedic timing - it sounds fine#I'm just not sure if that translates to text as well lol#But he doesn't actually talk often. the past two times have been exceptions since he keeps running into people#And he'll have to talk if he ever actally makes it to the Innkeeper's brother. But most obstacles on the road#are probably prettyy easily dialogue free#ANYWAY...#Love his dramatics.. Imagine if you just take one step towards someone and they scream and throw themselves#onto the ground and run away gjhhjbj#the cat just leisurely trotting over to catch up with him because they're not actually scared#anyway.. ! day 7.. that's like a whole week! except it's been over a week since sometimes it takes me like 2 days lol
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Also I feel like it's funny to note that in the past 48 hrs I have:
Almost lost my voice at high mass for Immaculate Conception yesterday (must SHRIEK for Mama y'know'm'sayin')
Thought my cars running lights were somehow burnt out 💀💀 (They were not but I sure shocked a few people on the highway with my high beams askdjhkhj)
Submitted my last piece of schoolwork FOREVA (or until I decide I need a chem degree after all)
Gotten mistakenly flagged, spent a nice few hours going insane over it, decided to set it down and read something, read Goodbye Mr. Chips and felt very fragile, then read Antigonick and felt even MORE fragile
Am now decorating my tree at last and skip-hopping around it like I'm five years old!
#all these silly funny highs and lows#then tomorrow i wake up early for rorate and it will be magic as it always is!#but if you're like what's eden up to? eden's caterwauling somewhere eden's fine#thinking out loud#the almost losing my voice part is so funny actually. i have a long history of singing too hard at Mass and almost losing it#and then croaking when i speak to people after and they're like girl...go drink something#and then i drink a bucket of sweet tea but that's not quite what they mean
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Always so sad when a product that changes other people's daily lives doesn't do the same for you... I know everyone's different but can I be the same here please
#this is about loop earplugs 😔💔#like they're not BAD but. aside from the shape they're not really noticeably better than foam earplugs for me#and in my right ear I can easily put it in place and it'll stay there#but it feels like my left ear is doomed to have Loose Earplug Syndrome. tried a few different caps#but it doesn't ever really feel like it is firmly placed in there#and also. I can still hear my upstairs neighbours moving around noises loud enough to interrupt me falling asleep#with the quiet ones that are meant for sleeping#I just take them out at some point during the night#and the engage ones do mute noise around me somewhat but I can't actually speak with them. my voice buzzes SO loudly inside my own ears#I lose track of what I'm saying immediately#sad though because they were. Not Cheap and I was hoping it'd be a good investment with my noisy neighbour#and I hear a lot of good about them which I believe... but for now they're just kinda. eh#stares out the window wistfully
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phineas and ferb episode that is rated pg13 so they are allowed one f-bomb. candace keeps trying to find the perfect situation to use it but every time she tries she gets interrupted or drowned out by a comically loud horn. meanwhile doofenshmirtz has made the censor-inator because now that they're pg13 he's convinced that vanessa doesnt know any swear words (she knows all of them) and that she'll explode if she hears someone say "shit" so he wants to make the entire tri-state area child-friendly. he flies it over danville in his official blimp and a one-off joke is that his laser hits a rated r movie that's a clear parody of the human centipede or someshit and it turns into a barney-the-dinosaur-ass psa. at the last second perry destroys the inator and knocks it out of the blimp and it fires off one more laser that censors out phineas and ferb's invention before mom can get home. candace tries to finally drop her one-allowed cuss but her voice has given out. perry comes back and makes a little platypus noise (all of those have been swear words the whole time but because nobody speaks platypus nobody notices) and then part of doof's machine crashes into the house (candace is in charge) and ferb says "what the fuck"
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sharing
synopsis: in which geto shares his girlfriend with his roommates. content: nsfw (foursome, kinda). (geto x gojo x nanami x reader) wc: 1.7k a/n: tried something new. i hope you like it! (not proofread)
sitting on the couch on geto’s lap, your face hidden in his neck as his fingers move up your leg under the blanket. you grab his hand to stop his movements but he doesn’t.
his fingers lightly move over your shorts, his knuckles swiping against your clothed pussy. you bite into his neck as the urge to moan overwhelms you.
"they'll see," you whisper into his ear. he turns his face towards them. his two roommates sitting on the other side of the couch. a blanket drapped over their legs. their focus was on the tv but geto could see gojo's hand moving under the blanket and over nanami's crotch.
nanami's eyes widen, his eyebrows shooting up as he quickly glances at gojo's blank face. he turns his face back to the tv and rests his head back on the couch. geto chuckles under his breath, "i think they're too occupied to notice."
confused you pull your face out of his neck and see what geto's talking about. nanami's breathing heavily — gasping every few minutes at the hand rubbing over his hardening cock. gojo turns his face and meets your eyes — a slow smirk curving up his lips.
your legs tighten around geto's hand. “wanna join?” gojo cocks his head. nanami's head snaps towards you and his expression quickly turns into one of pleasure when gojo slips his hand under his shorts. your face warms, a blush creeping up your neck. you gulp and look back at your boyfriend. “i can take you back to our room. or we can take satoru up on his offer. whatever you want baby.” he gives you the choice.
“can we just watch them for now?” your voice only audible to your boyfriend’s ears. he smiles against your cheek and nods. “go ahead satoru. give us a show.” geto drawls with a smirk.
and god does gojo give you a show. geto’s dick hard as ever and your panties so wet they were sticking to you like latex. gojo’s on his knees in front of nanami, face buried and tongue poking out to slicken his balls and cock with his saliva.
gojo pulls back from underneath and rest his face on nanami’s plush thigh, eyeing you and geto. pumping nanami’s thick veiny cock with a teasing smile. nanami’s lips parted and slipping out a mix of shaky breaths and moans.
geto’s hand moving over your clit stops and his breath hitches when nanami cums – his one hand gripping geto’s outstretched foot and other in gojo’s hair pulling his strands.
“suguru,” you whine loud enough that all three men’s attention is on you. your eyes flutter close in pleasure and he picks up the pace once more. his finger moves over your bundle of nerves, paying special attention to your clit. you cum with shy whimpers in his neck.
“no need to be shy,” nanami speaks up, a mocking grin plastered on his face. you pull away from your boyfriend’s neck to face to them. they’re both watching you intensely – as if they wanted to devour you.
“can i taste your girlfriend suguru?” gojo asks. geto looks at you for permission. you nod your head in agreement. your heart picks up a beat in excitement as gojo moves closer to where you’re sitting on geto’s lap.
“i’m not going to bite,” gojo jokes. you lay back on geto’s chest and he grasps your hand, rubbing his thumb over it to keep you calm. you’re acutely aware of their attention on you as your glistening cunt comes into view. gojo and nanami gasp in unison.
“i want a taste too,” nanami requests. you hum in agreement as gojo peppers kisses up your thigh. licking at your bikini line. you huff out a whine as his tongue moves up and down your cunt. messy.
his lips finally closes around your clit and your jerk further into his mouth. you can feel his smile as he sucks your clit fervently. overwhelmed with pleasure you don't realize when your hand moves under geto’s boxers – until he’s squirming behind you.
gojo's on a mission as he continues moving his tongue from your hole to your clit – licking hungrily and moaning at your taste. gojo moves aside - enough so that nanami could join him. you gasp as your legs are stretched further open for them.
feeling both their tongues on your pussy has the coil in your stomach tighten. nanami’s loud as he licks and pecks your clit. groaning out a “she’s so sweet” to which gojo replies “sweetest thing i’ve tasted in a while, no wonder suguru’s pussy whipped.” both of them break out in a light chuckle, face still buried in your cunt.
geto wraps a hand around your neck. grabbing your face and pulling you in a deep kiss. his tongue moving in tandem with yours – both of you moaning into each other’s mouths. you continue jerking him off and gojo joins in on the fun by palming at geto’s balls – massaging them teasingly making geto moan an elongated “fuckkkk,” and “keep going”.
your hand starts to loosen its grip as gojo and nanami’s tongues move over you in sync but gojo’s hand wraps around yours – pumping his leaky cock with you. you can’t tell who’s tongue is pushing deep into your hole and who’s tongue is flicking your nub – you bet they're both taking turns.
geto’s lips continue to move over yours. overstimulated from all the lips on your body – you’re cumming with a loud moan and legs shaking around the two men below.
you can still feel their lips and tongue on you as they slowly pull away and get lost in their own kiss. gojo’s huffing and groaning into the kiss as nanami pulls out his hardened length – covered in so much pre cum you’d think he already came.
nanami starts pumping him and pushing him back to sit on the couch. moving down his neck leaving a red bite mark under his jaw, kissing over his clothed nipples and making him buck his hips in his grip. he pushes out his tongue and licks his tip and gojo hisses out a “fuckk ken baby, take it easy”. but he’s too lost in pleasuring gojo to hear that and takes him down his throat with ease.
you continue to pump geto and his cum covers your hand. gojo’s eyes snap towards your cum covered hand and he licks his lips in anticipation. his gaze holds yours as you move a finger into your mouth and suck oh so sensually – chest rising and eyes shutting.
it has him hitting the back of nanami’s throat and making the blond man gag. you move out of geto’s arms and close to gojo. squishing his cheeks to make his lips pucker and you let a line of cum fall onto his lips. you pull him into a kiss and he hums at the taste of geto.
you feel geto’s hand on your ass as he spreads your legs apart and licks a stripe from your one to hole to another. you jerk at the sensation and gojo grabs your shoulders to keep you steady and continues kissing you, licking geto’s cum off your tongue.
he bites your lip as he pulls back and shoots a load of his own cum down nanami’s throat. tugging his hair and pulling him into the kiss. geto pulls back and joins your kiss. four tongues mingling with one and another – sharing gojo’s salty but unusually sweet cum.
you pull away and turn to your boyfriend. he licks your lips.. top…bottom. and as soon as you poke out your tongue he’s sucking it into his mouth. your salivas meshing together. “bedroom, please” you speak into the kiss. and he’s carrying and walking upstairs towards his bedroom immediately.
you see the two men still going at it – lost in their own pleasure. palming at each other trying to get rid of any layers that are keeping them apart. both letting out loud groans, hands tangled in each other’s hair.
geto lays you down on the bed. pulling off your shirt and kissing down your body so sweetly. muttering praises into your skin “my sweet baby did so well” with an emphasis on my.
you mewl when he kisses between your legs. “shh, i’ve got you now,” he coos. he places your legs around his waist and lines himself up with you. “just want you suguru, only you..” you whisper in awe of his figure above you. his skin covered in a sheen of sweat.
he pushes into you – his head cocks back in pleasure. feeling your warmth surround his cock and he lets out a loud whimper. you claw at his chest at the feeling of his cock nudging deeper into your core. moving in and out. sounds of your pussy squeezing around him emanating loudly into the room.
he falls over you. his hand squeezing yours as he pushes it up next to your head. dipping his face down to kiss you. and he keeps his lips on yours as he picks up the pace. his hips rutting into yours. you lock your legs behind his back – pulling him in impossibly closer. skin to skin.
he moves a hand down to your clit, spelling his name over your nub. you giggle at the realization. and he smiles gazing into your eyes. you cum once more and milk him in the process. you moan in satisfaction as ropes of his cum reach deep inside you.
he falls on top of you. his body weight comforting. you move a hand into his hair, scratching lightly. “how do you feel?” he checks in with you – knowing that this was an unexplored territory for you. “did you like it? was it too much?” he adds.
“i don’t know,” you hum in thought. “I mean i feel good. it wasn’t uncomfortable. it was just new and i guess i’ve never seen them that way,” you say honestly. “would you wanna do it again?” he asks curiously.
“not sure. i like it when it’s just us. but if you want to, i think i don’t mind trying. i know you’ve done…” you leave the sentence unfinished. he chuckles lightheartedly “heh, baby. i just want you. i like it when it’s just us, too,” he smiles against your lips.
you’re about to kiss when you hear one of them – no, both of them moan each other’s names loudly. you both break out in laughter. they’re going to be getting lots of noise complaints come morning.
���� ⋆。〰️⋆。˚𖦹 ⋆𓆞𓇼 ⋆。〰️⋆。˚𖦹 ⋆𓆞𓇼 ⋆。〰️⋆。˚𖦹 ⋆𓆞𓇼 ⋆。〰️⋆。˚𖦹 ⋆𓆞𓇼 ⋆。〰️⋆。˚𖦹 ⋆𓆞
a/n: comments, likes and reblogs are appreciated!
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#✎ luna.writes#jjk#jjk x reader#jjk smut#geto x reader#geto smut#geto x gojo#geto x nanami#nanami x reader#gojo x reader#gojo x nanami#nanago#satosugu#nanami smut#gojo smut#jjk nanami#jjk geto#jjk gojo#geto suguru#geto suguru smut#gojo satoru#gojo satoru smut#nanami kento#nanami kento smut#jujutsu kaisen smut
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MONEY HONEY! — ☆ GOJO SATORU.
➤ popstar!gojo masterlist
headline. fucking your client wasn’t on your bucket list. the famous popstar 'toru' says he can’t perform because of issues he’s having with his voice. but he finds another way to warm up his vocal cords—it involves being between your legs.
word count. 4.2k
warnings. fem! reader, popstar!gojo, pwp, unprotected sex, modern au, he's a whiney brat, overstim, degradation, praise, semi public, impact play, cunnilingus, fingering.
an. lol this was fun 2 write !! ty @osaemu as always for beta'ing
“…nono, you don’t understand. i can’t go out there, i just…can’t—!” gojo mutters, and he’s pacing back and forth. talk about a drama queen. to think you had to deal with this every day, being the infamous satoru gojo’s personal assistant was never an easy task. his attire was…quite enthralling to say the least. gojo was draped up in a sheeny black one-piece with rhinestones attached in a few places, he always had his outfits designed a certain way. not too tight, not too big.
you sat on the sofa, taking a sip of a latte he bought you as a thanks for saving him to deal with the hoards of paparazzi that practically lived outside the stadium back-way entrance.
“satoru, you do this before every show,” you sigh, glancing at him. you couldn’t lie to yourself, he was strikingly handsome. gojo’s hair was a tad bit messy and ruffled. it was a slight v-cut towards his chest to show a bit of skin. his fangirls always went wild over the most minimal things such as that. “you do realize you’re supposed to be performing in front of 10,000 people? canceling right before a show isn’t a good l—”
“i know…i know,” he pouts, and he’s so unserious, you sort of found it hard to believe this was a millionaire pop star who’s such a household name. gojo lets off a loud sigh before walking towards you with a sheepish grin. “these cough drops you’ve been givinʼ me haven’t done shit.”
“really...” you deadpan, casually giving him nothing but a sly eye roll.
gojo sulks and he’s just a few feet apart from you now. “mhm���really,” he says, and the slight rasp in his voice catches your attention. his earpiece was still on, as well with his mic that hung just barely underneath his chin. “i did research though. about other methods that help with heh, um vocal fry..”
you stare up at the popstar, and he’s returning the gaze…as if he was trying to hide the smile that was already forming against his pink lips. you don’t give him an answer and this time, he’s the one to roll his eyes.
“…well since you asked so nicely,” he grumbles, the same pout going against his face before he pulls out his phone. gojo scrolls a thumb down against his bright screen before clearing his throat. “hm, according to this totally accurate article, it says… to fully recover from vocal fry, a guy must uh, receive a special treat within a woman’s—”
you blankly stare at him, already second-guessing his fake response. “just say you want to eat me out, satoru.”
“wha— where’d you get that impression?” he plays dumb, furrowing his eyebrows and cowardly looks around the room. a few seconds go by before he shrugs, speaking quickly, defeated. “….fine i wanna eat you out. hmph.”
you turn your head for a brief moment, hearing the defending roars of the crowd just a few areas down from the dressing room the two of you currently stayed in. “maybe after your show, they're chanting for y—”
“they can wait,” he frowns, and he turns you around, two hands softly holding onto your shoulders. gojo remained with a pout, bottom lip just slightly tucking underneath the top one. “i can’t.”
the both of you grow quiet for a long moment, and gojo seems serious—dramatic, but serious. you and him both exchanged sensual eye contact, and you were so close to gojo that you could practically smell the strong cinnamon scent of his intoxicating cologne. the popstar smooths his lips together before briefly shifting his eyes down at the floor and then back up at you.
“five minutes…five minutes, that isn't too long is it?” he stammers, and the gaze the two of you made starts to get more and more intense. “i won’t get into too much trouble if it's just five minutes right?”
“you’re insufferable.” you mumble, letting off a soft sigh. “okay, five minutes. if you say this helps with your—vocal whatever.”
not much to your surprise, five minutes turned into half an hour.
you held back a moan the sudden second you felt gojo’s warm tongue swiftly lap against your drenched folds. he made you wriggle against him, and you maintained a rough grip against the laid-back sofa.
“s-satoru,” you’d whimper out, gasping at how sloppy he was. you were prompt up in such a position to where you were bent over the arm part of the couch, skirt lifted, fishnets just barely pulled down, and the most vulgar expression. “oh my g-goddd, you're gonna make the others outside h-hear.”
“you’ll just have to be a little more quiet, assistant,” he whispers, cool breath fanning against your pussy. perhaps this was unprofessional, no it was very unprofessional. a plethora of following consequences started to race through your mind. “what time is it?”
you moaned, reaching near the wooden half table for his watch and read the time, “um.. quarter past eight.”
“aw man,” he sulks, softly licking the your tender pulsating numb with the very tip of his tongue. with a quick second, he maneuvers circles all over your clit to feel you squirm and jitter against him. “that much time passed? can’t stand rushing…”
as you cling onto the fluffed couch, your black pencil skirt that was just sluggishly raised up and yet, you continued to gnaw the inside of your lip from the feelings of his tongue, entirely sloppy.
the slurps that exited from his mouth had your bottom lip quivering in such desire. you craved more, the way he swirled and curved the length of his tongue throughout your pussy earned umpteen gasps and whines from you.
“s—satoru,” you’d croak out, and he’s casually taking the time to make out with your folds. languidly, your slick race down his chin, and between breaks to breathe, he'd lap up his tongue before diving back in. “fuck, ‘m gonna cum again, think ‘m gonna cum..”
“wait a little longer, yeah?” he murmurs, grabbing the fat of your ass with two rough hands. you felt bundles of butterflies stir inside your stomach, feeling gojo’s nose swipe against your folds for a few jiffs. “let me eat, haven't had a good meal all fuckin’ day.”
you swallowed, not even facing him but you could practically see the grin stretching across his lips. “and…and who’s fault was that?”
he chuckles, warm breath fanning against your cunt. “okay, you have a point,” and your thighs feel feverish—you’re so hot, and not because of the sudden humidity wafting around the small dressing room.
the popstar lolls out his tongue, humming before you moan, feeling him lick your pussy in a straight direction. “mhm, this is better than anything else though.”
you were about to speak, but all that did was make you let out a shaky whine. the smooth pads of his thumbs graze against both parts of your ass as he continued to eat you out like a starved man. it was as if time stood still, your mouth grew exceedingly dry and your legs felt like they could barely stand up on their own.
“sa..satoru,” you once more repeated, not knowing how long you could last. simply, his tongue was dangerous—god, it was just the way he moved it in every direction.
he knew where to lick, where to suck, and even nibble. gojo found himself tickling his tongue against your little nub before sucking on it. all to hear you cry out in desperation. cacophonies of whimpers depart from your glossed lips such as, ‘satoru,’ ‘please-please,’ and ‘m gonna c-cum.’
there was no denying, gojo had you an entire stammering mess. you found yourself even questioning how this became, the two of you were never intimate. although, there's always been steamy moments between the two of you.
for instance, there was a moment where gojo took you with him to the hot springs while he was on tour…which non-surprisingly led to a hot make-out sesh. that was a few months ago, and the two of you decided to not think much of it. of course though, there are always assumptions being made about the two of you—always from the nosy journalists and interviewers.
each interview, it’d always be questions they’d ask about the precious little assistant that’s essentially attached by the hip to the famous gojo satoru.
“are you and that girl exclusive yet?”
“how long have you two seen each other?”
“please. describe to us. what’s she like in b—”
they’d get more perverted each time. alas, gojo always loathed it whenever the press referred to you as ‘that’ girl.
his jaw would always clench in sheer annoyance. perhaps he didn't have the right to feel that way, but he was somewhat protective over you. it wasn't like you were his bodyguard or anything clearly, but still. he always liked how you treated him just like you’d treat anyone else.
“satoru..” you'd cut him off from his deep thoughts. “your phone keeps beeping.”
“huuuuh?” he grouches, ears perking at the annoying screech of his device. gojo’s thumbs remain against both edges of your ass before he breaks off his lips, a long string of his own saliva running down your slit. “oh, can you hand it to me?”
he's so nonchalant, and with your back still arched, you lightly fling his phone towards him.
he grumbles.
picking up the phone, typing in his twenty one digit passcode of ‘sexymansexyspraycan69’ before with a click, it unlocks. gojo darts his eyes towards his phone and hums at the five messages left from his manager, kento nanami.
‘Greetings. Where are you? Message me Ass.’
‘ASAP. Autocorrect.’
‘Your fans think your dead.’
‘Don’t tell me you're busy with that assistant of yours again.’
‘When your sales start going low, don't blame me.’
and many more unread, “blah blah yeah yeah,” gojo murmurs, skimming through the loads of unread gray bubbled messages. “nothing important. geez, can't have a single moment to myself.”
you were so close to orgasming and that's when gojo flips you over to face him—you're panting and he flashes you a soft smile, leaning in to kiss your forehead. “aw, waiting for me?” he whispers, bringing a gentle kiss towards the inner corner of your neck. his touch was immensely warm, something you just couldn't describe. “you wanna cum don't you, baby?
“m-mhmm.” was all you could manage out, wrapping your arms around him as he got right between you. gojo continues to trail kisses down your neck before chuckling.
“use those words, c’mon. don't be shy. i wanna hear ya tell me what you want.”
the way he was such a tease, you couldn't stand him, then again you could. so annoying, gojo’s warmth of his performing outfit brushed against your skin. the perfectly knitted fabric of it dancing against your skin as he inched closer towards you. “tell me how much of a messy girl you wanna be.”
“i—” you started, and he took a moment to stare into your eyes. gojo looked so pretty, smug yes, but pretty. long lashes each time he blinked, fluttering against him. whenever he showcased that well-known cheeky smile of his, his dimples would poke right against his lips. “i-i wanna cum. please, lemme cum, ‘toru..”
“pretty girllll wants to cummmm,” he sings in a playful melodic tune. again, you couldn't stand him. singing right in the middle of something so intimate. gojo runs a hand down your buttoned-up shirt before chuckling. “hm, i suppose. go ahead, let go fʼr me.”
once you do, immediately your vision turns dizzy. all you saw was a few blotches of white, and it feels so good that the feelings have you biting down on your lip. gojo leans into your neck, whispering sweet nothings against you while giving your ass a soft caress.
“good girl, just let go…yeah,” he purrs, giving your collarbone a gentle suck. you taste so sweet to him. you're addicting, simple as that. like candy he can't get enough of.
gojo satoru had a sweet tooth for you, there was no doubt about it. “fuck, i can just suck on you all day,” he utters in a low voice, and his warm hands part your thighs so he can get a bit more between you. “i need more…fuck the fans, i need you.”
“idiot, don’t say that..” you moan, and he's kissing all down the crevices of your neck again. gojo’s lips against your tender skin gave you chills. even still, you were so hot, from the neck down. it felt amazing, the feeling of him sucking and kissing against your skin to such a point that you're just throbbing. “t-they’re waiting for you.”
“they can keep waiting,” he smiles, leaning down to kiss near your chest, moving the exclusive backstage lanyard pass away with a slight grip. “damn, you don't know how hard i’ve been during rehearsal. i—i think about you, you know?”
you gawk up at him as his body towers over you, his costume glimmers in the light before he starts to peel it off carefully. you were taken by surprise so you mutter, “you…you do?”
“well yeah girl,” he rolls his eyes, such sass in his tone, following with the low rasp that hid underneath his voice. “you drive me crazy in the worst way.”
“the feeling’s mutual, popstar.” you utter, a glint in your eye.
“hmpf. now that i was nice enough to let you cum, you decide to be a brat, huh?” he raises a brow, using two fingers to brush his mic piece aside.
a coyish grin goes against your lips. “sorry. are you gonna do anything about it?”
“…shut up..” he grumbles, and he does.
pretty much, you then found yourself on your hands and knees on the couch, feeling gojo caress your ass briefly before meeting the mounds of your skin with a mean spank.
you suck in shortened breath. “ooh,” he says as you moan in unison of the light thwack. “you get off on spanks, huh?” he utters in a grouse, the feeling of his palm kissing against your skin making you continuously pulse.
“n-no.” you spat.
“liar,” he matches your snarky tone, and you let off a gasp once you feel him finally rub the tip of his dick against your folds. gojo grows abnormally quiet the minute your slick coats his length freely. “fuckkk,” he sighs, eyes closing for a short second. you teasingly wriggled your ass against him and he spanks you again. “you’re so impatient, wait.”
“do you even know how to fuck?” you slip out, and you held back a giggle. perhaps you shouldn't have said that, your thoughts did speak way more than they should anyway.
gojo’s eyebrows curl into a furrow, and his voice genuinely sounds offended. “wha—?! of course i do.”
“just asking.” you tease.
“just asking,” he mocks your tone, completely butchering it purposely and gojo slowly starts to make his way inside of your tight pussy. he's gradually moving himself in, and you let off a moan before he continues, “yeah. shut the f-fuck up.”
a small grin stretches against your lips, because you hear how gojo stutters whilst sinking inches into you. even while trying to be mean and degrading, he was so close to moaning himself. it was simply adorable. you maintained a mere pristine arch while biting the inside of your cheek once more.
“you're s-so wet ‘n sloppy,” he huffs out a groan, and the squelches your pussy made against him was simply enticing. for a second, you grew mute once you gave your own body a listen. just the faint sounds of gojo’s jagged breathing, “f-fuck, ‘s good. keep facing that way, just like that. good.”
gojo’s touch against your spine was purely gossamer.
he was soft, gentle, delicate.
yet the minute he started to create a pace with his rollicked hips, he couldn't contain himself. the way his dick probed throughout your walls, you kissed your teeth in longing—just for him to just hurry.
gojo was always such a tease, the fat plump head of his cock dabbing against your pussy.
“s-stop playing and just put it in.” you moaned, growing impatient by the mile.
“heh, you know what they say,” he mumbles, you pulse even more once you feel him slide in about a single inch or two…only to then go right back out. “patience is a virgin.”
“…it’s virtue.”
“that’s what i sai—”
“just fuck me.” you whined.
gojo giggles, and finally, he starts up his slovenly pace again. he grips onto your hips before sighing. he takes note of the way you progressively suck him in.
you linger over the couch, the fabric of your own pencil skirt just hovering over your waist before gojo starts to sway his hips.
you had to stop yourself from being so noisy, executives were probably in the other room.
some kind of meeting perhaps occurring, yet here you were, happily entangled with your client. such thick inches he was dumping into you had nearly drooling. gojo’s base was rotund and fat, thwacking and thwacking against you to where you're so dizzy.
“f-fuck, ‘toru.. ‘s good.” you whined, every few seconds he’d smack your ass to watch your ass jiggle with such recoil. it was one of his favorite moments to witness. as your lips stuck together, your thighs already felt weak and tremulous.
“damn girl…didn't expect you to s-start throwin’ yourself back again me,” he sibilates, and for a concise moment his head goes back. a groan flies past his glossed pink lips as your ass continued to thrash against him. “you're such a needy girl. tryna…f-fuck me back..”
the way his voice unintentionally got low whenever he was in such a trance had you throbbing, such convulses making you nearly weak in the knees.
to you, the feeling was indescribable. such pools of heat ran between your legs the more his thrusts picked up.
his dick reached every spot, so much so being precise—you felt the curve of his length analyze all throughout your inner walls. it didn't miss a spot, he reached deep and you let off the cutest whimper. “god, r-right there. please, ‘toru. y-your curve, ‘s reaching me deep.”
“you f-flatter me,” he pants, trying to ignore his flusteredness. gojo’s right hand, the hand that had a half-cut open glitter glove that coordinated alongside his outfit ghosts against your ass. his lip quivers from his pace, and the way your pussy just sucks him dry, a few splotches of pre-cum cutely coated against the outer part of your ass. “fuck, dunno how much i can take with you movin’ your ass against me like that…shit, shit.”
“…s-satoru,” you breathed, biting down on your arm to suppress your moans a bit. not before long, he deepens the angle and you feel his sharped hips piston in utter contentment. “fuck, f-fuck. ‘s deep.”
gojo groans, swallowing the nonexistent lump in his throat before he feels himself coming close.
“think you’re gonna m-milk me dry,” he gasps, jerk after jerk his hips go against you at full throttle. the base of his dick, you hear the pap pap pap noises commence, and it’s so obscene. “shit, think ‘m in love,” and then you grow hot. it’s a long inelegant pause before he adds to his words, “…i-in love with your pussy.”
you were gonna comment something, but you were too fucked dumb to comprehend anything. you’re basically being fucked stupid into the cushioned sofa. the cottony bristles of the fabric went against your skin as your body lurched forward each time.
splaying at an almost animalistic pace, gojo’s ears, the very tips of them at least grow incredibly hot, you’re making his body heat up, scorching. the way your pussy tightly hugged around him like a vice, he was obsessed.
he just couldn’t get enough. to think this was the first time he’s been this intimate with you—oh, how he could only imagine what it’d be like for a second time, or a third time, or a…
“s-satoru, your phone’s ringing..”
he grunts, glancing down to see the bright-lit screen display, and this time it’s geto. with an eye roll, he ignores it, still gripping your hips, he’s attaining his peak before he lets off a husky groan. “f-fuck, ‘m gonna cum.. can i—?”
“y-yes, jus’ do it, ‘toru,” you spoke, not even letting him finish his sentence—you knew what he was gonna ask though if he could shoot inside. you were so drunk from his dick, thoughts on your mind were straight mush.
“okay, okay,” he breathes, and even his moans were pretty. figures, gojo was a soprano, so he was bound to sound angelic, even while moaning his head off. it had the perfect pitch to it, such rasp in it, almost breathy.
you feel gojo’s pelvic bone thrust a bit more at a quickened pace, accelerating just a bit more and his nerves were just going wild. “fuck, f-fuck..” he grunts, and he starts to grow a bit whiney, his sloppy hits against your rear made out to be a tad bit voluntary, rhythm a bit more expedite, and he clenched his jaw.
once gojo came, it's so much.
thick ropes that seeped right into you. you moan, and he pauses his hips just to watch, feeling himself pouring all inside. velvety ropes of the popstar’s cum fills you up to the brim. you're panting, he's panting, and gojo was in love.
was it love? he didn't know, but his pupils were dilated for sure.
his breath hitches once he slowly pulls out, watching his own cum slowly spill out between your folds and he lets off a moan. “made me fuck such a mess into you,” he spouts, running a thumb down your slit to watch you cutely jounce against his touch.
“you ruined my panties.” you whined, turning over to face him—gojo leans in for a kiss, and you return the favor, tasting yourself once more on his lips. the sweetened taste of your own slick that still remained all over his tongue.
“baby, it's not like you need them,” he rasps, grabbing ahold of you, and he positions you to get on his lap. “besides, i was gonna ask to keep them.”
“why?” you mumble, wrapping your arms around his neck, slipping off a moan at his already sensitive tip hovering against your entrance as you realigned yourself.
timidly, he runs a hand down his neck. “y’know. for uh…good luck? was gonna keep them in my pocket or something.”
“you're so—”
“shhh.” he hums, interrupting your words for another tender kiss. your tongue slides against his, and he tastes minty.
as his breath collides against yours, you playfully bite down on his lip. gojo grunts, and he’s making your way inside again. gingerly, you sink down against his thick base and he gives your ass a mean squeeze before spanking it once you start to move.
“oh f-fuck…fuck, forgot how sensitive-” he hiccups, watching with half-lidded eyes at your hips rotating against him in an orderly fashion. you moan from his pleasure, taking a second to swallow before whimpering—softly, you kiss against his neck and he grunts. “you-you make me feel so good, baby.”
gojo’s almost at a lost for words, he’s had his fair share of women, but none could make him feel like this.
besides, he's never had the time. touring day in and day out was a hassle, and intimacy was a straight no due to his overly busy schedule.
although, whilst the two of you were screwing around, making out and you're riding him cowgirl, that’s right when the wooden creaky door bursts open.
not to anyone’s surprise, it's no one other than gojo’s best friend and bassist, suguru geto.
“you've got to be joking,” he utters with crossed arms, immediately darting his eyes away. “everyone’s been calling you, there's a search party, and—”
geto pauses, tilting his head. “…is that my clothes you're wearing, satoru?”
“suguru…hey man,” gojo gasps, nervous laughter following his tone—you jump in surprise, and he wraps an arm around your waist. “i’m… kinda of busy here.”
“i don't give a fuck,” he grumbles. “by the way. your mic was on the entire time. you moan like a girl more than her.”
gojo’s eyes widen, reaching for the tiny button near the edge of his mic.
indeed, the switch was turned on and he awkwardly laughed, bringing the speaking part up to his lips.
“eheh…hey mic check?” and he could hear himself echo through the ear piece. embarrassing.
despite you still being inside, you just sat there—geto staring away, not even trying to comprehend what was happening before gojo coos out a subtle cheeky, “uh…i didn't know my mic was on. my bad.”
“you're so stupid...” you run a hand against your forehead in disbelief. an entire stadium practically heard the both of you.
the heels of geto turned before gojo brings a finger against your lips to shush, and he pouts. “sugu wait,”
“what.” he mutters, turning back around.
“wanna join…? don't think a few more minutes wouldn't hurt…r-right?”
“…….”
#★vegasbaby.#popstar!gojo#gojo x reader#gojo x you#gojo satoru smut#gojo smut#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru x you#satoru gojo x reader#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen x you#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x you#female reader#anime smut#anime x reader#gojo x y/n#tw sex#gojou satoru x reader
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I'm imagining how Logan letting you see his claws up close for the first time would go and like not to be too tmi, but I do think Logan's claw slits would be soooo sensitive.
I could imagine him not really holding hands with you or letting you get too close to his hands in general until the two of you have progressed past something superficial.
The first time he lets you even get near his hands is when the two of you are lying in his bed. Your back pressed to his chest and his chin resting atop your head.
You've got one of his hands held by both of yours, running your fingers over his blue veins and tracing the divets and scars of his skin.
"How'd you get this one?" You ask, running your thumb over the rough line of skin, tilting your head up against his chin some.
His other hand momentarily stops its path where he'd been smoothing it down the soft of your arm.
"Think I was cutting up an apple," he jokes.
The two of you burst into a fit of giggles and he presses a kiss to the side of your temple, moving to speak before he's suddenly caught off with a moan so low you almost weren't sure what it was at first.
Logan doesn't even seem as though he's noticed as his brows remain furrowed and his body relaxed beneath you.
"What was that?" You turn to him, brows arched. You know he can already read the scheming expression written over your features.
Wordlessly, he pops his neck as he moves his hand upwards towards your face, pulling your hands along with it.
Balling his hand into a fist, he turns his knuckles towards you.
Your eyes catch on three small slits between each of his digits, only about half and inch or so long.
Cautiously, you run the tip of your finger down the length of one, earning a shiver from the man beneath you.
"Does it hurt?" You say quietly, nearly a whisper. Almost as if speaking too loud would startle the riveting atmosphere of the room.
You feel him shake his head 'no' behind you before he says gently, "feels good."
You give a slow nod at that, eyes glued to his knuckles.
"Can I touch them again?" You ask after a quiet moment passes.
Logan hums from behind you, "Go ahead."
You're careful in the amount of pressure you apply as you gently stroke the tips of your finger down each slit, relishing in the soft hums earned by the man behind you.
You can feel Logan's eyes watching you – as if equally enthralled with your newfound fascination of his mutation.
He lets you enjoy the delicate nature of it. A man so brutally threatening and deemed almost wild for the majority of his life subdued by something so seemingly trivial about the very thing that labeled him dangerous in the first place.
It's sweet to him.
"D'like it?" Your voice pulls him from his haze.
He seems to mull over his response, unfurling his hand to flex all five fingers in a spread palm.
"S'okay," he offers before unsheathing his claws, letting you look them over.
The lights from his room add a sparkle to their sharp tips, and for a moment, he finds his loathed despotion for them to be almost futile.
"They're pretty." You comment, meeting his hazel eyes in the metallic reflection of them.
He scoffs, "That's just cus' you're lookin' at yourself in 'em."
You feel him reach towards his beer on the nightstand. "I mean it." You click your tongue.
It's a sensitive topic for him, you know that.
Logan takes a swig of his beer, taking another look at his claws. He turns his hand back and forth before retracting them with a 'Shing!'
"Well, in that case," he flicks your temple with a chuckle, "Thank you."
"Can I see them again?" You pull his hand back into your own.
With a sigh, Logan unsheathes his claws for you again.
He takes another swig of his beer, mumbling "Brat."
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now more than ever it's blatantly obvious that people go out of their way to erase trans men from communities and queer history. it's always been happening, but it's way easier to watch it in real time now thanks to the internet and social media. we are watching people basically gloating that they misgender trans men and don't see them as men. we are now watching people kick trans men out of queer spaces because they are often "femme and them" or "nonbinary and woman" support groups, conflating nonbinary identities with womanhood, and denying trans men or transmasc nonbinary people places to go. many of them get told that their presence would "scare" the lesbians, women and enbies because they have trauma.
where do the trans men with trauma go, though? we can't go anywhere. when i was struggling with domestic violence that ended up destroying my right leg, i was denied shelter in queer spaces and even women's spaces even though i have F on license. domestic violence shelters especially will turn trans men away if we pass. even if we partially identify as women, we can't go in because 'our voices are deep and scary and we're loud and aggressive and threatening and might prey on the defenseless scared women'
finding transmasc support groups is like trying to find a needle in a haystack. i've seen numerous organizations across the US have transfemme support groups, nonbinary/genderqueer support groups, and then nothing for transmascs. where the hell do we go when they won't let us go anywhere?
we try to exist online and they try to erase us from here, too. bickering and arguing about how we're not real men, sending trans men death and sexual assault threats, acting like they're saviors for kicking out the "dangerous ugly men" from the queer community, as if we don't belong to it at all.
i refuse to be erased. i refuse to sit in silence while people tell me my problems don't matter because now i "have male privilege". I don't. once people find out what my legal name is they view me as a woman. strangers however view me as a cis man and will deny me help, either through programs, or because i'm a "strong young man, i should be able to pick myself up by my boot straps." i'm not white. i'm not abled.
i'm proud to be a trans man and i will be here to fight for other trans men's rights to have a platform to speak, and spaces to occupy. i will not rest until trans men & mascs have safe places to be and meet other trans men.
trans men are queer. we belong here. we are taking up the space we rightfully deserve and we are not leaving.
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" LEMME HIT YOU WITH THAT DUMB DICK ! "
𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 — dazai, chuuya, jouno (+ tecchou), oda, sigma x fem!reader
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 & 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 — [n]sfw content, somnophilia, these are random scenarios ok don't come at me, degradation, humiliation, doggystyle, rough, getting caught, pussy slapping, s.ex at work, oral (m & f receiving), fingering, piv, unprotected s.ex (be careful babes), praise, creampie + etc • this was originally supposed to be their fav places to fuck but i had to scrap that bc i lost motivation :') anyway, happy reading and i hope you enjoy !! not proofread soz babes
ps. reblog to show your favorite writers support, they're greatly appreciated ! <3
⁰¹ 𝐃𝐀𝐙𝐀𝐈 — fucking you in a storage room of the agency
This man is a sex fiend, so of course he would love to fuck you literally anywhere anytime. Though he can't lie, being balls deep in your juicy little cunt at work — risking both of your dignities and possibly your jobs has him harder than a fucking rock.
"Osamu— what if we g-get caugh— mmh-!" you let out a muffled moan as dazai delivered a particularly harsh thrust into your cunt, effectively shutting you up. "Relaaaax, sweet thing — almost no one c-comes here — fuck, you're so damn tight," Dazai panted into your ear, hot breath making a chill run down your spine — back arching even further against his chest.
"God, you're so good f'me — so warm 'n right, fuck!" each word was rushed, dripping with lust — the desperation in his voice made you wanna look at his pretty face, pussy clenching just from imagining how good he'd look with his hair disheveled — his usual doe eyes narrowed and a deep blush covering his skin, sweat dripping down his forehead and making his hair stick to his forehead —
Your train of thought got cut off abruptly when Dazai slapped his hand over your mouth, before his hushed voice reached your ears, "shh, stay still f'me, sweetheart."
You were about to question it when you heard the president's voice from just behind the door. The door of the room you were currently getting your back blown out in.
"Yes, I keep hearing strange noises from this one room in particular," you heard fukuzawa's muffled voice — the thought of your boss catching you in the act made your pussy flutter around Dazai’s length, making the brunette grunt in response.
"Are you trying to get us caught, darl'?" Dazai hissed into your ear — oops, you unintentionally clenched down again upon hearing the keys jingle from the other side of the door. Luckily Dazai was ready for it this time, and managed to bite down on your shoulder before he could get a sound out.
"W-what do we do, 'samu? He’s gonna come in!" you whisper-yelled, panic settling in your bones when you saw the doorknob rattle — but before he could unlock the door fully, you heard the high pitched voice of another worker, "president! an important client has come to personally see you."
"Hm, alright. looks like i'll have to tell someone else to take a look in this room later. Let’s go,"
You let out a breath of relief once the footsteps faded away, leaving you both in complete silence until dazai decided to speak up —
"You clenched reaaal hard when he was about to open the door — don't tell me you actually wanted us to get caught, did you, naughty girl?"
⁰² 𝐂𝐇𝐔𝐔𝐘𝐀 — having you suck him off in his office
Chuuya's job as an executive of the mafia is stressful, to say the least. Not to mention some of the idiotic workers not doing their job right never fails to make his blood pressure go especially high — his anger issues doesn't help his case at all. But what does help is his sweet sweet girlfriend giving him some... 'under the table service' at work.
Chuuya's fist slammed against the hardwood desk, a loud 'thwack!' echoing in the room,
"What the fuck were you thinking?!" he sneered at the poor man in front of him — who couldn't help but flinch at seeing his boss so angry at him failing to complete a simple report.
Truth be told, Chuuya wasn’t really that mad at the worker, for the report at least — he was just.. super on edge from you deep-throating his cock under the goddamn table. He struggled to think properly, and the poor worker interrupting his private moment with you really ticked him off. Can you really blame him though?
How could he think straight with your skilled tongue swirling around his glossy tip so sinfully — fucking tease. Oh and the way you peered up at him through lowered lashes, your eyes glazed with a dreamy haze.
It all made his head spin like crazy.
“-ir, I can re-do it if you would like me to..” Chuuya’s train of thought unfortunate got cut off short, blue eyes snapping back to the man before him — right, the report.
“A-ahem — alright. Have it finished by 6 pm.”
Chuuya hated the way his voice cracked, fingernails digging into the palms of his hands as he tried not to moan out loud when you fully took him nose deep in that right, sweet little throat— shamelessly rutting your hips into his crazy expensive slacks, rubbing your juices all over the smooth, polished material.
You felt Chuuya’s fingers entangle themselves in your hair immediately after hearing the ‘click’ of the door shutting — the guy must’ve finally left.
You couldn’t help but gasp as you were pulled up from the cold, hard floor — and being shoved onto the desk instead.
You felt your pussy throb in your lacy panties as Chuuya spread your legs open — two fingers pressing and prodding at your cunt before sliding the flimsy material to the side,
“Now, let’s get into the real fun, shall we darl’?”
⁰³ 𝐉𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐎 — teaching tecchou how to eat you out properly
Jouno was a good friend. Even though he might've had a tendency to be a little harsh and.. sadistic at times, he wasn't a bad person. I mean, he had to be atleast a decent person for teaching his inexperienced co-worker how to eat pussy — specifically, his own girlfriend's.
"No, not like that you fucking idiot —" Jouno grumbled, pulling Tecchou's head off of your cunt as he blinked in confusion like a lost puppy, sticky strings of your arousal still attached to his lips. "What do you mean? She's clearly enjoying it.."
"I mean that you can do better. You do want to make her feel fuckin' amazing, don't you?" Jouno raised a questioning brow. "Well, of cour—" "Then start acting like it."
A gasp left your honeyed lips when Tecchou's face was pushed back against your cunt — hot tongue working with even more fervor as he ate you out like he had been starving for days.
"Oh fuck — feels so g-good, sai," you whimpered out — head thrown back and your tongue threatening to loll out from the sheer pleasure the man between your legs was giving you. "Yeah, baby? Feels good when Tecchou eats that sweet cunt out reaaaaal good, huh?" Jouno's tone was condescending — his lips curled up into a cocky smirk.
“Y’smell so sweet - taste so sweet -” Tecchou's voice was low and dripping with need — your pussy throbbed from just how desperate he sounded.
"A-ah shit - can feel you throbbin' on my tongue, princess —" he groaned, tongue flattening against your clit as he shook his head side to side.
You babbled out Jouno’s name like a prayer — all while the man between your legs worshipped your cunt like it was his god, pink tongue repeatedly flicking your clit, making you see stars as your hole stretched around two of his slim fingers.
“Please — wanna c-cum s’ba- mmh!- ,” you let out a strangled noise as a harsh slap landed on your soaked pussy, clit throbbing as you threw your head back once more. “Fuckin’ slut, so damn eager to cum on another man’s tongue in front of your boyfriend, hmm?”
“Don’t — ah fuck, squeezin’ so tight ‘round my fingers, baby - don’t be so mean, Jouno,” Tecchou threw a side glare to the man next to him, which only earned a shrug from said man, “quit talking and enjoy the meal, dumbass. She’s close.”
And enjoy the meal he did — lapping up every single drop of your sweet juices so enthusiastically you’d think that he hadn’t eaten in days.
⁰⁴ 𝐎𝐃𝐀 — morning sex with him
Mornings with your husband, Oda Sakunosuke, were sweet, blissful and filled with love. Sometimes he'd surprise you with breakfast in bed, it's the least he can do considering everything that you do for him, is what he says. But sometimes — you crave him instead of the delicious food.
“My pretty girl,” Oda smiled sleepily, moving some of your hair out of your face to admire your effortless beauty — blissfully unaware to how his deep morning voice made your heart flutter in your chest, and your pussy throb with need.
You grinned back, scooting closer into his arms as you gazed into his deep brown eyes, “pretty enough to fuck?”
Oda raised a questioning eyebrow, full lips curling into a grin, "oh? that's the game we're playing, love?" Strong arms wrapped around your bare figure, the marks of last night still fresh on your skin — a reminder to how he fucked you dumb on his cock only a few hours prior.
You felt your face burn from the memories of last night rushing back into you — god, you two were insatiable - you're sure Oda fucked you in every single position in the book, and it did nothing but make you crave him more.
"Still with me, darling?" he lightly tapped your cheek, snapping you back to the present. You nodded, a gasp falling from your lips as big, calloused hands found themselves groping at your tits, pinching at your cute nipples as he pressed open mouthed kisses on your neck — his stubble tickling the sensitive skin there.
"O-oda—"
"shhh, baby — lemme do all the work, yeah?"
And that's how you ended up with your face pressed into the pillows — silken bedsheets tangled around your bodies as Oda fucked his fat girth into your sopping cunt nice 'n deep.
A large hand was pressing your back into the meanest arch ever — strong hips slamming against the fat of your plush ass with each deep thrust, thick mushroom tip prodding at your g-spot - making you bleat out your husband's name pitifully. Oda only pushed your head deeper into the soft pillows — clearly too lost in the feeling of your velvety walls clenching around him.
He watched his cock slipped in and out of your pussy so easily — your slick covering his balls down to his thighs. Oda groaned deeply in his throat as he watched a creamy ring form around the base of his cock — your cunt sucking him in so eagerly that he almost thought it hurt for you to let him go.
You let out a particularly loud moan as Oda's cock hit that one spot in you — you could only bite down on the pillow as your eyes shut closed, pussy slobbering shamelessly all over his length.
"Oh? Did you like— argh! - t-that spot, sweet girl?"
⁰⁵ 𝐒𝐈𝐆𝐌𝐀 — fucking you in your sleep
Sigma was a busy man — with running the sky casino and being part of the decay of angels didn't leave too much alone time with just him and you — especially for some.. intimacy. You knew he needed to relieve himself someway — all that workload while being pent up as fuck certainly wasn't good for him. Plus, you have been craving him as well.. so you came up with an easy solution.
The door to your shared bedroom clicked open — your beloved boyfriend, Sigma, letting himself in as his eyes racked over the entire room, searching for anything out of the ordinary — you did tell him that you had a surprise for him, after all.
Upon finding nothing, he stalked over to the bed, confusion lacing his features as he glanced over at your sleeping form. Slender hands slowly slipped the soft blanket off of you and oh —
It all clicked suddenly.
The lavender coloured lace suited your complexion so perfectly, the expensive material hugging your features like it was made for you. Sigma gulped, eyes fixating on the way your tits were practically spilling out of the flimsy fabric — your stiff nipples very much visible to his hungry gaze.
It wasn't long before he had his face buried between your plush thighs — Sigma was so desperate, not even bothering to take the lingerie off your body. Besides, why would he when you just looked way too good in it?
He was practically eating you out through the thin lace — nose bumping against your clothed clit as his tongue tried to push deeper into your cunt. You had him in a chokehold — but he couldn't care less.
Sigma's slim hips were rutting into the expensive sheets — precum leaking from his sensitive tip as he tried his best not to cum untouched just from tasting your sweet pussy, but fuck, you were making it so hard for him.
He felt his cock throb in his pants when you started letting out soft moans and sighs in your sleep — or were you even asleep anymore? He didn't know and neither did he care — mind too focused on making you cum on his pretty face.
"ohh s-shit — best surprise - sluurrp - e-ever—" he whined into your cunt, spitting directly into your sticky hole before slurping it all back up.
Safe to say, he definitely enjoyed your little surprise.
© 𝐎𝐒𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐈𝐘𝐎 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 ─ do not copy/translate/repost and/or recommend any of my works on different platfroms under any circumstances. reblogs greatly appreciated !
#bungou stray dogs#bungou stray dogs x reader#bungou stray dogs x reader smut#bungou stray dogs smut#bsd#bsd smut#bsd x reader smut#bsd x reader#dazai smut#dazai x reader#dazai x reader smut#chuuya x reader#chuuya smut#chuuya x reader smut#jouno x reader#jouno smut#jouno x reader smut#tecchou smut#tecchou x reader#tecchou x reader smut#oda smut#oda x reader#oda x reader smut#sigma x reader#sigma smut#sigma x reader smut#dazai osamu#chuuya nakahara#jouno saigiku#tecchou suehiro
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ᡣ𐭩 TELLING THEM THEY'RE PRETTY!
FEATURING: dazai osamu, fyodor dostoevsky, nikolai gogol
SUMMARY: telling the bsd boys that they're pretty! (wordcount: 3.5k; sfw; fem!reader)
AUTHOR'S NOTES: i had cute dividers but this won't show up in the tags if use them D: ! i had sooo much fun with this! i hope you guys enjoy! :D
DAZAI OSAMU
You can’t seem to drag your gaze away from him.
As a long day of work comes to an end, you rest your head on your arms and lean on your desk. Kunikida is still tapping furiously away at his computer, Tanizaki and Naomi are whispering about something together, Ranpo is sorting through his candy, and Atsushi and Kyouka are looking through files. But your eyes are tracing over Dazai Osamu as he leans back in his chair, lazily spinning and bobbing his head to the music he’s listening to.
The setting sun casts an ethereal glow over him, his lips idly turned up and his lashes brushing his cheeks as rests his eyes waiting for the day to end. Dazai Osamu is pretty—you’ve always acknowledged that—but there’s something about the peace of this moment, the domesticity of the office and the ambience of the lighting that has you utterly enraptured.
He looks so at ease, and Dazai Osamu is never at ease. Even when he throws up that clownlike mask of his and spends his day entertaining under the guise of joy and humor, you can always see the strain in the corner of his eyes and lips. It’s subtle, almost imperceptible really—if you were anyone else, you’d miss it, but you’re not anyone else, much to his displeasure, because you know he hates how easily you can see right through him.
After a few minutes, Dazai peeks his eyes open—and you’re almost breathless, because his eyes are like melted honey beneath the sunset, warm and gentle, glittering with amusement. You think you can stare at him forever and never tire of it.
He rolls his chair closer to you, resting his forearms on your desk so that your arms are brushing and laying his head down on them so that his face is mere inches from yours, matching your position. There's a smile on his lips, soft and teasing as he whispers, "You've been staring at me for five minutes."
"Mhm," you agree, voice just as quiet as if to not disturb the tranquility of the office. You can feel his breath light against your face from the proximity he's laying at and you can smell peppermint on his breath from the candy you’d seen him swipe from Ranpo’s desk earlier when the other man had gone to speak to Fukuzawa.
“Is there something on my face?” he asks playfully, dark eyes glimmering as he waits for your response.
You can tease him back and say yes, as you usually do and is probably what he expects—and you fully intend to do just that but the words that leave your lips are not that.
“You just look really pretty today,” you say softly, watching as his eyes widen just a bit at your words, pink dusting his cheeks.
His lips part to say something but no words leave them. He opens and closes them a few times and you marvel because Dazai must know that he’s pretty from all of the attention he gets from women, so you don’t understand why he’s so thrown off hearing you voice it out loud. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him genuinely speechless before now.
“So you don’t think i’m pretty every other day?” Dazai pushes his bottom lip out into an over-exaggerated pout, recovering swiftly from your words, though you expected nothing less from him. But you can’t help but note that his cheeks are still a bit pink and there’s something indecipherable in his eyes.
“Prettier than usual,” you amend and watch as the flush on his cheeks darkens and he instead resorts to completely burying his face in his arms with a frustrated groan.
“I am supposed to be the flirt, bella,” he complains, voice muffled by his arms as he hides his face from your view. He cannot hide the way his ears have gone bright red, and you have half a mind to reach out and tug at them
You lift your hand to your lips to hide the giggle that rises to your lips, scooching your chair a bit closer so you can knock your shoulder against his.
“I’m not flirting,” you say. “Just stating a fact.”
He turns his head to the side, just enough so that he can give you a heavy side eye—you can only barely see the red hue coating his cheekbone.
“Not mutually exclusive,” he says grumpily, and you lean down to press your lips against his now exposed forehead, smiling softly as his eyes instinctively flutter shut and his body relaxes as the touch.
Then, you receive a pencil to the side of your head. You yelp as your hand flies to where it had made contact with you, scowling at your assailant who is none other than Ranpo, smiling widely as he waves at you and then motions to Kunikida, who is red faced and staring at the two of you. You can’t tell if it’s in embarrassment or anger.
“Not during work hours,” he snaps, and you realize that he’s definitely embarrassed, so you share a short look with Dazai, who has regained that mischievous look in his eyes as he glances over at Kunikida and back at you.
Without saying a word, or giving any other sort of warning, he leans in to press his lips against yours. It’s a short and chaste kiss, but his lips are soft and taste of candy, and you think you might be able to kiss them forever if you get the chance.
Now you’re the one flustered, you can feel heat rising to your cheeks as you stare at Dazai, who is evidently thoroughly pleased to not be the one uncomposed if the unscrupulous grin on his lips has anything to say about it.
He tosses you a wink before rolling his chair back over to his desk, animatedly complaining about Ranpo and Kunikida being lonely and bitter and getting in the way of Dazai’s chance at true love because of it—you only roll your eyes at his dramatics, as you usually do when Dazai goes off on tangents, but it’s with much more fondness this time.
•••
FYODOR DOSTOEVSKY
You are not listening to a single word that he’s saying.
It’s a dangerous situation to be in with Fyodor Dostoevsky, you’re sure he’s noticed by now and he will be petty enough to finish his brief about his plans and your involvement and then ask you to repeat what he said, but you just can’t focus.
He tied his hair back, you note, still quite a bit awed by the sight. There are two locks framing his face and his bangs are falling between his eyes, but the rest of his hair, which has grown a bit long in the weeks that he’s been ardently preparing for the final stages of his plan, is pulled back into a lax bun.
He looks so casual, and Fyodor Dostoevsky never looks casual. He’s dressed in a turtleneck and loose pants as he leans back in his chair. There’s a folder resting on his lap that he’s idly flipping through and he keeps glancing up at you occasionally, pale lips flat and violet eyes disapproving, but you just nod along to his words even though you know that he knows that you’re not paying attention.
And you think, distantly, that you probably should be paying attention because he’s talking about your upcoming mission and what you should expect from it but you figure you’ll be fine—it’s a simple infiltration mission, nothing to worry about. And you’d much rather prefer to appreciate Fyodor’s rare repose than to listen him droll on about boring topics.
Sometimes, you think if he just kept his mouth shut all the time, he’d be perfect. But you think you’d miss his sharp-witted comments and the lengthy debates the two of you have after a few glasses of wine.
He looks extra pretty tonight, even beyond the casual hairstyle and clothes and his uncharacteristically relaxed demeanor, and you think it’s because of the way the flames of the fireplace are casting an enchanting orange and red glow over his face. It makes the violets of his eyes burn alive in a way that they usually don’t, you’re far too used to the glacial visage they take whenever he puts his attention on someone. Every time he glances up at you, you swear that you can get lost in them.
“… And you are not listening to a word that I am saying, are you?”
Fyodor is giving you the heaviest side eye as he finally calls you out, expression unamused. His brows are furrowed and his pale skin is taut with thinly veiled irritation.
“Of course, I am,” you dismiss, waving your hand. “Infiltration mission, detective agency, get close to the tiger boy.”
Fyodor looks distinctly unimpressed by your words, brows deepening—you figure you must have spoken wrongly, you probably shouldn’t have been so indifferent, and you bite back a sigh before reaching forward to press two fingers between Fyodor’s eyebrows, as if to forcibly smooth away his annoyance.
He blinks and draws back, out of reach of your arm, and then casts you an even more irritable look.
“You’re not taking this seriously,” he accuses. “This mission will be dangerous, you’ll be at risk of being exposed every moment you are in the agency and if you are exposed-“
“Your plans will be ruined,” you finish, forcing yourself not to roll your eyes. “I kno-“
“You could be killed,” Fyodor corrected, voice cold and sharp, and you look back over to him. He looks unusually intense, and you’re not sure if it’s because of the appearance that the flames of the fireplace are giving him as they flicker dangerously across his face or if it’s because he’s that displeased with you being distracted. Either way, you find your mind drifting again because wow. “Dazai Osamu is not a man to be taken lightly. When he manages to figure out who you are and what you’re doing, we will need an immediate extraction plan.”
“Careful, Fyodor,” you drawl, watching as his violet eyes narrow briefly, “almost sounds like you care.”
Fyodor’s lips twist but he doesn’t respond. You raise your eyebrows, he looks away. Your eyes shoot open.
“You have a bigger role to play,” Fyodor finally says, but he’s no longer looking at you. “You cannot be killed yet.”
“Yet,” you repeat, amused. Fyodor’s jaw tightens, he doesn’t look at you, his eyes are trained on the fireplace to the side of the two of you and you can vaguely see the flames reflecting in his eyes, burning ardently against the familiar violet.
You lean forward again, shifting off of the couch to sit on the coffee table between the two of you so you can reach him. You reach forward to brush your knuckles against his cheek—he doesn’t move away this time, but his eyes cut to the side to watch you carefully.
You don’t say anything for a moment, absently tucking one of the locks of hair framing his face behind his ear. His hair is soft, freshly washed—for once—it smells faintly of lavender and vanilla and you wonder if he stole your conditioner.
“You look very pretty tonight, Fyodor,” you say quietly, and then smile. “It’s hard to focus when you look like this.”
The expression Fyodor directs toward you is extraordinarily blank, except for the faintest specks of pink that glare compared to the pallor of his face.
He shakes his head, looking away from you yet again.
“… You cause me much suffering,” he murmurs, and somehow, you know that might be the closest you might get to an admission of love from Fyodor Dostoevsky.
You smile to yourself. “And you to I,” you say, voice a bit teasing, and then you add, “Now, can you tell me again what to look out for?”
The moment is ruined. Fyodor’s eye twitches and he’s giving you that unamused look again, and you think having him repeat himself might be a mistake because now you’re even more distracted, but Fyodor sighs and starts on his lecture again so you force yourself to listen.
It takes about three minutes for him to release a sigh of utter suffering when he realizes that your eyes have glazed over yet again.
•••
NIKOLAI GOGOL
Nikolai has a wild sort of beauty about him. He’s unpredictable and dangerous, and it’s widely apparent in his frenzied laughter and chaotic behavior. His eye glitters and his teeth gleam sharply beneath the glow of the moonlight as he waves his hands around, animatedly describing to you all of the details of the things he’s been doing while you were away.
Fyodor’s masterplan has involved Nikolai apparently taken upon an infiltration role at the ministry of defense—you think it’s a bold move for Fyodor to use Nikolai for such a tenuous mission, but he’s apparently been having the time of his life with it. Though he thinks his boss is deplorable and one of his coworkers has evidently pissed him off beyond repair, because now he’s telling you about how he’s been ‘pranking’ the man in righteous vengeance.
You think Nikolai’s idea of pranking varies from yours, because you’re pretty sure him using his ability to break into the man’s house constitutes a crime not a prank. But you don’t have it in you to make that distinction when he’s so excitedly telling you about how every day he’s been going into his house to move around all of his stuff and hide some of his belongings to make the man squirm. He’s succeeding outstandingly in his ambition, if the videos he’s waving in front of you have anything to say about it.
You watch as he frantically scrolls to the next video—“this one is the best,” he claims, as he has for every video thus far. You watch with an amused smile as his dark-haired coworker steps into his apartment and nearly starts crying when he realizes that all of his stuff has been moved again, scrambling for his phone to call the police, who have—according to Nikolai—apparently already told him multiple times that there’s nothing they can do about it. The video is shaking wildly, as if the person filming can barely hold the camera straight, and you’re convinced that’s exactly what it is because you can hear Nikolai’s muffled laughter coming from recording.
Nikolai naturally finds it much funnier than you do, half-way keeling over as he wheezes, his laughter shattering the peaceful night. The two of you are sitting at a park near the apartment that Fyodor had leased for you for the duration of the Yokohama operation. The moon is high in the sky, casting a bewitching glow over the lake in front of you and there’s a chill in the air—it’s a nice night all around, you think there will probably some frost dusting the grass in the morning but the cold hardly bothers you now with Nikolai pressed to your side as he laughs himself into a near-coughing fit over his harassment of his coworker.
“Why aren’t you laughing?” Nikolai suddenly complains loudly, scowling at you, but even then he keeps having to bite back residual laughter whenever he glances back down at his phone. “It’s funny.”
“It is funny,” you agree. Nikolai gives you a look as if he doesn’t believe you. “It is.”
“Then why aren’t you laughing?” Nikolai accuses doubtfully, and then adds, even more accusatory, “You hate me.”
You’re not sure why you aren’t laughing, honestly. Usually you’d be burying your face into his shoulder trying to smother your snickers, because even though you might not entirely agree with Nikolai’s idea of a prank, you can still find some humor in it. Because it is kind of funny. Kind of.
But then you realize that you’re probably not laughing because you’ve been spending most of the night admiring Nikolai rather than listening to him prattle on about his escapades and watching his poorly recorded videos, so you can’t fully appreciate the humor in the videos. With his cheeks flushed from copious amounts of laughter and his eyes glowing with excitement, you think he’s very pretty tonight—Nikolai is always pretty, but the angle at which he’s sitting leaves the moon haloing behind his head, and maybe it’s just because you’ve missed him the past few weeks when you’ve been abroad dealing with a territory dispute with Tolstoy, but you think there’s something special about tonight.
“I don’t hate you. I guess I’ve been too busy admiring you,” you finally say, a playful smile on your lips as you tilt your head to the side to look at him. “You look pretty tonight.”
Nikolai blinks, eyes wide and owlish as he processes your words. The longer he goes unresponsive, you acknowledge that a quiet Nikolai is far more unnerving than a loud and erratic Nikolai, you’d expected a more… theatrical response to your comment. A swish of his cape, him leaping to his feet with a twirl and an agreement, even just a wild laugh; instead, he looks away abruptly. He doesn’t even just look away, he physically turns his whole body away from you.
You blink.
“Nikolai?” you ask, a bit astonished when he literally ignores you. You lean forward, trying to get a look at his face, but then he swivels around even more and your lips part in shock. “Nikolai.”
You’re only met with a face full of his soft white hair, impeccably braided, as per usual—you have half a mind to tug at it hard to try to get a response from him, but you aren’t in the mood for the lewd comment that would likely spill from his lips after.
“Koly-“
“Poor me, poor me,” Nikolai suddenly cries loudly, “The little koshenya mocks me when all I do is try to make her laugh. Poor me, poor me.”
His hand flies to his face, melodramatic as he bemoans your alleged cruelty. You stare at him, mind trying to piece together what exactly is happening—Nikolai is always hard to predict, but you feel like this is a bit strange even for him, and that’s saying something.
“… What?” you start to ask but Nikolai has thrown himself into a loud and theatrical tirade about how he doesn’t deserve such injustice and how he was only trying to make you laugh, and how it’s so, so cold-hearted of you to taunt him when this is the first time the two of you have seen each other in weeks.
Nikolai is impossible to bargain with when he gets like this, so you only sigh and tilt your head up to the sky, his words flying in one ear and out the other as you wait for him to settle down on his own.
Instead, you swear the world is against you because rather than settling down, he becomes increasingly more noisy and distressed, and his accusations become even more asinine. Now, he’s saying that you’ve always had it out for him and how you weren’t laughing at his jokes because you hate him and want to report him to the police and how he should tell Dostoy about your betrayal, or better yet, he should stuff you in his cloak and leave you there?
You side-eye Nikolai heavily as he continues on, slightly alarmed, but brush off the casual threat as just Nikolai being Nikolai. You don’t know how to shut him up, you think you might be out here all night listening to him, and now you’re the one bemoaning your fate because how did a simple compliment turn into this.
Finally, an idea strikes.
You brace yourself, questioning your sanity and your entire existence before you interrupt him with a loud, “Quiz time!”
Nikolai goes silent instantly, head snapping toward you, eye even wider than before.
You think you’ve hit an all time low as you say, “Was I trying to mock you before?” Nikolai opens his mouth to respond but you cut him off before he can. “What’s that you say? I wasn’t? Ding ding! We’ve gotta winner!”
You think Nikolai might be having an internal crisis. He’s staring at you as if he’s seeing you for the first time in his life—his lips are parted, his eye void of the usual mischief dancing in it. He looks as if he wants to say something but he doesn’t know what.
You let out a long breath as you go to speak up again, but before you can, his eye is glittering again, sharp and dangerous, and his lips are curving up into a slow smile.
Nikolai inhales and then he takes a complete one-eighty as he bursts into loud cackles and says, “Ahahaha! I knew you loved me!” as if he wasn’t just lamenting your irrational hatred for him moments before.
Your eye twitches. He begins a second tirade, this one far more embarrassing for you than the last.
You regret everything.
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