#the vocals are so good guys i listened to this on loop the entire time i was drawing

[squishosaur]

not everything will be rewarded, even time and money can be wasted; someday everything will fade into the past— still, i sing because i was born here. // 生きるよすが

[dazealigner]

hi hi hi

i have a request! could you write julien x reader where julien is obsessed (in a good way) where she only talks about reader in interviews and stuff

pls pls pls

and thank u

hiii anon !!! i’ve actually thought about this thoroughly in the past so i have a couple of hcs stirred up for you ! but i also wanted to say that @itsrorysstuff has also wrote for this same idea awhile ago and did an amazing job at executing it (:

jb talking about her gf in interviews hcs!

(i’ll preface by saying that jb’s girlfriend is a famous singer-songwriter in this scenario, just because interviewers would then ask about their relationship more frequently and i don’t get why julien would talk about her girlfriend excessively if she wasn’t exposed to the public eye like julien is. also to give some background, i’ll say that they discovered each other’s music prior to their romance and met through a mutual friend, lucy or phoebe perhaps)

because you two both listened to each other’s work way before you guys even started talking, julien definitely brought one of your albums up in the Records In My Life interview and even spends some time analyzing it as well before she’s subtly cut off given the time limit and their remaining questions

there’s occasional mentions of you here and there, to which you reciprocate until finally lucy/phoebe unites you two

and man oh man are lucy and phoebe third and fourth-wheeling because the entire night you two are trading ALL of the compliments and the analyses you’ve been itching to share since the moment you both discovered the other’s work

fast forward to julien and singer-songwriter!gf NOT beating the u-haul lesbian allegations, this is where julien really begins to excessively talk about you

philosophical question? she’ll mention your input on the matter. question about a lyric on the record that you helped with? oh boy that interviewer is in for a ride.

and there’s nothing more phoebe and lucy enjoy than teasing julien about you two’s relationship

“After the show in Dallas, me and Lucy went to grab something to eat, and—” “Wait, where was Julien again?” “You know where she was.”

and julien FLUSHES pink not just because the entirety of the camera crew were exchanging confused glances but because she herself knows where she was and more importantly who she was with

anyways you being known for having schemes up your sleeves when it comes to your albums, julien’s now getting asked about your music as well, and she LOVES it because she knows everything about your upcoming albums in secret and she’s now become apart of the scheming and teasing

if you announce a single release and you wanna hint at its title, let’s say you use the single title in your instagram caption, and then julien somehow finds a way to insert it smoothly into something she’s saying in an interview and lucy and phoebe are like “😏😏” cause they’re in the loop too

and then in the nardwuar interview as he’s handing out the most thoughtful gifts, in the back of julien’s mind, all she’s thinking about is how much you’d love those gifts

“Oh my god, me and my girlfriend were just talking about Trio. .” and phoebe and lucy are snickering from beside her as she goes on a rant about what specifically you two were talking about.

when the boys are on the red carpet for GQ Men of the Year and they’re already all rocking hickies and then they get into the conversation of dates when amelia interviews them…..

“What about you? Have you ever been on a date?” “A date? I’ve been on one.” “Recently, too.”

and on top of her remark, lucy’s eyes trail down to julien’s hickey. not that it’s noticeable in that exact moment, but fans inevitably notice

and finally when you do release any projects you’ve been working on, julien is so incredibly vocal on how well-deserved the recognition you receive is and how proud she is of you. she acknowledges every single hour you spent in the studio and its merit outcome.

and, of course, the level of affection julien shows is obviously reciprocated by singer-songwriter!gf

[eternal--returned]

IGGY POP: Once I heard the Paul Butterfield Blues Band and John Lee Hooker and Muddy Waters, and even Chuck Berry playing his own tune, I couldn't go back and listen to the British Invasion, you know, a band like the Kinks. I'm sorry, the Kinks are great, but when you're a young guy and you're trying to find out where your balls are, you go, "Those guys sound like pussies!" I had tried to go to college, but I couldn't do it. I had met Paul Butterfield's guitarist, Mike Bloomfield, who said, "If you really want to play, you've got to go to Chicago." So I went to Chicago with nineteen cents. I got a ride with some girls that worked at Discount Records. They dumped me off at a guy named Bob Koester's house. Bob was white and ran the Jazz Record Mart there. I crashed with him and then I went out to Sam's neighborhood. I really was the only white guy there. It was scary, but it was also a travel adventure—all these little record stores, and Mojos hanging, and people wearing colorful clothes. I went to Sam's place and his wife was very surprised that I was looking for him. She said, "Well, he's not here, but would you like some fried chicken?" So I hooked up with Sam Lay. He was playing with Jimmy Cotton and I'd go see them play and learned what I could. And very occasionally, I would get to sit in, I'd get a cheap gig for five or ten bucks. I played for Johnny Young once—he was hired to play for a white church group, and I could play cheap, so he let me play. It was a thrill, you know? It was a thrill to be really close to some of those guys—they all had an attitude, like jive motherfuckers, you know? What I noticed about these black guys was that their music was like honey off their fingers. Real childlike and charming in its simplicity. It was just a very natural mode of expression and lifestyle. They were drunk all the time and it was all sexy-sexy and dudey-dudey, and it was just a bunch of guys that didn't want to work and who played good. I realized that these guys were way over my head, and that what they were doing was so natural to them that it was ridiculous for me to make a studious copy of it, which is what most white blues bands did. Then one night, I smoked a joint. I'd always wanted to take drugs, but I'd never been able to because the only drug I knew about was marijuana and I was a really bad asthmatic. Before that, I wasn't interested in drugs, or getting drunk, either. just wanted to play and get something going, that was all I cared about. But this girl, Vivian, who had given me the ride to Chicago, left me with a little grass. So one night I went down by the sewage treatment plant by the Loop, where the river is entirely industrialized. It's all concrete banks and effluvia by the Marina Towers. So I smoked this joint and then it hit me. I thought, What you gotta do is play your own simple blues. I could describe my experience based on the way those guys are describing theirs . . . So that's what I did. I appropriated a lot of their vocal forms, and also their turns of phrase—either heard or misheard or twisted from blues songs. So "I Wanna Be Your Dog" is probably my mishearing of "Baby Please Don't Go."

Legs McNeil & Gillian McCain ֍ Please Kill Me: The Uncensored Oral History of Punk (1996)

The Stooges ֍ I Wanna Be Your Dog (1969)

Muddy Waters ֍ Baby Please Don't Go (1953)

[voidisverytired]

Luka tended to check out sometimes. He'd be fully immersed in a conversation one second, and the next he's staring off into space, catatonic, unresponsive to even the loudest screams.

In his teen years, his mother thought he was on drugs and had him taking a drug test randomly every couple weeks.

And he might as well have been on some type of drug. Maybe it was a hallucinatory one that plagued his sight with visions of Chat Noir getting impaled by his own staff. Or Vesperia getting her miraculous ripped from her hair. Or that time Ryuuko jumped a little too late and was flung into a wall of brick.

By now, he knew the identities of every miraculous holder in Paris, plus some other uncomfortable details. Like the fact that Gabriel Agreste was Monarch, or that Alya once willingly caused an Akuma in her teen years, or that Felix's dad was an abusive dick (don't even ask how that one was found out in the span of five minutes).

Luka had witnessed a thousand different possibilities. Each one haunted his dreams, twisting the once sweet melodies echoed from his life to his dreams into dangerous and violent tunes. Screeching of chords that would have normal people covering their ears and begging for it to be turned off. But no, not Luka. He'd grown so used to the clanging of cymbals that he sat and listened to the sound, trying to make a sense of a beat. A melody. A pattern, so he could better understand.

But he never found one.

That did not stop him from pursuing one fervently each time the screeching chords revisited him.

As Viperion, Luka had seen horrible things. Witnessed things that only he would remember.

Rena Rouge wouldn't remember the scream she let out that rubbed her vocals raw when Carapace had fallen from the Eiffel Tower with no shield available. Rooster Gold wouldn't remember the feeling of having his arm torn apart by the claws of a panther. Pegasus wouldn't remember the feeling of having his hair ripped from his head. And oh so thankfully, Purple Tigress would never remember the way she choked on her own blood when she was stabbed by a violent villain.

It was terrifying, Luka supposed, to be the one who remembered. To be the one who'd carry those screams, those sounds, those sights, to an early grave.

It was utterly terrifying.

"-erion! Viperion!"

Someone was shaking him, Luka realized. When he focused his eyes and looked up at the person who had their hands on his shoulders, he came face-to-face with Ladybug. Behind her, the other heroes of Paris stood, each with equally worried looks on their faces.

"What happened?" He asks, though he fears he already knows the answer.

"We were hanging out, but when Pigella tried getting your attention, you weren't responding." Carapace responds.

"You weren't reacting to anything." Chat Noir was crouched in front of him, worried greatly. He was one of the few present who knew Viperion's identity.

"Sorry." He supplies dumbly.

When he gets no further verbal response, just worried glances, he decides to give them more context.

"When I have to use my second chance during an attack, I usually check out for a good hour. It's best for me to go to my flat and relax, but you guys were really insistent that we all hang out." Luka immediately regrets his words when he notices the guilty looks of the heroes. He hadn't meant to inadvertently blame them. "It's fine, really!" He tries backtracking. "I only had to use it a total of 17… no, that's not right." He shakes his head quickly. "16… no 15 times. That's a bigger amount than last time I had to use it. This guy was hard. In one of the scenarios, Argos got stabbed." And oh, Luka realized as he rambled on about what he had witnessed, he was slipping again.

"Ladybug got her earrings ripped out one time and this other time, Carapace used his shell to protect Rena but didn't account for himself and got crushed by a giant rock. I spent an entire loop laughing uncontrollably after Chat was thrown off a building and hit the ground. And oh, that was such a fun thing to hear. Can someone take me home?" He tries to use some of his still intact brain cells to interrupt his rambling. "I really need to go home or I'll keep rambling and you guys really don't need nor want to hear this stuff. I need to go home!"

"I've got you." Argos steps forward and helps Viperion up. "Your loft is on my way to my place anyways."

—

As Felix, detransformed and wearing some silky pajamas, tucked him comfortably into the weighted blanket and sat by his bedside, Luka recalls a conversation he'd had with Sass after a particularly bad loop.

When Luka screamed that he felt he was going insane, Sass looked him dead in the eye and said, "Insanity is a given for the people who wield my power. I chose you because you can deal with it. Do not make me believe I chose wrong, Luka."

Luka had no choice, really, to lay down and take what the universe threw at him.

He'll wake in an hour or two, screaming for someone— who? He doesn't know— to run, to jump out of the way, to get out of the fight.

He'll spend tomorrow walking around his flat in a haze. He won't remember how he spends his day, but he will remember the bone dead tiredness seeping into his veins and locking him to his bed, like vines made from the strongest of metals.

He'll live.

He has to.

[bunchashapes]

any music recs?

i could have made this very short or entirely too long. i opted for the latter:

HAVE YOU LOOKED FOR SOME NEW MUSIC TO LISTEN TO? LOOK NO FURTHER, FOR HERE IS

I know. There's a lot of music out there. Well have no fear, because I've selected, organized AND categorized a fine number of music selections, just for you! I tried to keep it to just stuff you probably haven't heard of before, but I make no promises. Hopefully you'll find at least one new thing you can take with you into 2023.

MAKE YOUR SELECTION:

1 - MIKE, I'M LOOKING FOR SOMETHING TO GROOVE TO. SOMETHING I CAN GET DOWN AND VIBE WITH OR PERHAPS LISTEN TO WHILE I WORK:

Sounds good! Let's start with a few of those:

Vulfpeck - Okay you may already know about Vulfpeck. Sorry. If you HAVEN'T, they're a wonderful group of dudes from Michigan that are all insanely talented. They have a wide-range of styles they cover and pretty much every member has gone on to do other solo stuff, which may also suit your interests. They also have a spin-off band called The Fearless Flyers that I'll cover a little further down.

Jacob Mann (As well as his Big Band) - Jacob's solo stuff has a nice laid-back feel to it, while his big band stuff is slightly more bombastic, but all of it is fun and groovy. Great example of a musician effectively switching between different toolsets, whether its a whole group of talented musicians at his disposal or just a bunch of nice Roland presets.

EMEFE - They haven't been very active lately but EMEFE is an incredible ensemble with plenty of amazing music for you to listen to. Their live album from 2017 makes me wish i could go back in time and watch it live.

Louis Cole - Louis Cole's also pretty popular, but maybe you haven't heard of him! Originally hailing from Knower, he's collaborated with a ton of musicians (including Vulfpeck AND Jacob Mann Big Band, mentioned above) as well as produced an impressive array of solo music. I can't understate how much I love this guy.

Thundercat - Know who else he's collaborated with? Thundercat. Have you listened to Thundercat? You should really do yourself a favor and listen to Thundercat.

Sammy Rae and The Friends - Only learned about Sammy Rae very recently but The Feeling (linked) was an earworm that lodged itself in my brain for months. Infectiously positive vibes, a great ensemble and really brilliant singing.

Silk Sonic - Okay they played at the Grammys so it definitely doesn't count as a deep cut but listen to Silk Sonic anyway okay? Okay.

2- MIKE I NEED SOMETHING THAT WHIPS ASS. SOMETHING TO COMPLETELY KNOCK MY SOCKS OFF.

Can do. Your metric of kickass may vary but at least one of these should work for you:

King Gizzard and The Wizard Lizard - King Gizz has put out such an unbelievable volume of music that it's hard to just recommend ONE thing from them. I've linked Nonagon Infinity, a great little album with the fun gimmick of seamlessly looping front to back. They really haven't put out a single bad album, so just go wild.

Royal Blood - Royal blood's bassist plays through an octave pedal, giving their stuff this fuckin' beefy sound that's well-rounded enough you'd never guess the band is just a bassist and a dummer. Their style has gotten poppier lately but it's still all worth listening to.

Tricot - Tricot's been around for around 10 years now and their stuff has only gotten better over time. I feel like Math Rock is kind of an obtuse genre for most people but their recent stuff is absolutely worth checking out even if that's not your usual sort of thing. Makkuro (真っ黒) is my favorite album of theirs by far.

Thank You Scientist - Stranger Heads Prevail is probably one of my favorite prog albums ever and you'll probably like it too. Insanely good ensemble (the amazing triple threat of sax/trumpet/violin is such an integral part of their sound) and really fun vocals.

Nova Collective - Another incredible prog group. As far as I know they've only put out one album but it whips ass.

Ask My Bull - These guys popped out of the woodwork a few years ago and I've been obsessed with them ever since, I can't wait to see what they do next. If you're a horn-loving freak like me you absolutely need to listen to them.

Fearless Flyers - The previously aforementioned Vulfpeck spin-off band, guest starring Mark Lettieri of Snarky Puppy and the incredible Nate Smith on drums. Their album Tailwinds is easily one of my favorite albums ever, the addition of a sax trio takes their stuff from incredible to legendary.

Daikaiju - Kaiju-themed surf rock. That's really all that needs saying.

3 - MIKE I NEED SOMETHING THAT'LL MAKE ME SAY "DAMN THAT'S COOL"

Well you're in luck! A wide range of things fit the bill:

Snarky Puppy - A powerhouse jazz/funk/rock ensemble full of insanely talented musicians. Just give this song a listen, you won't regret it.

The Dear Hunter - Dear Hunter (not Deerhunter. Different band) has remained my favorite band since high school. The band has a number of different projects, A collection of EPs for each color of the rainbow, a 5-part rock opera/narrative concept album (with a 6th part that may be a movie??) and other more straightforward albums that still cover a broad range of genres and styles. I think they're great and hopefully you will too.

Hiromi Uehara - Hiromi's probably my favorite pianist ever. Just watch that video. She's ridiculous. She also plays in an incredible trio and guest stars on my favorite Tokyo Ska Paradise Orchestra song! Preposterously talented and insanely fun to watch. I love her.

The Bad Plus - Speaking of great trios, you can't go wrong with The Bad Plus! Really vibrant arrangements and generally incredible musicianship throughout their work.

Esperanza Spalding - Obscenely talented bassist AND singer AND songwriter. As someone who sings and plays bass (not at the same time, of course) watching her do effortlessly do both at the same time is mesmerizing. I love her.

Chon - Chon's also pretty big now but I want you to imagine you're me at a Dear Hunter (see above) concert back in 2015 and one of the opening bands walks onstage and you're like "well okay what's these guys' deal" and then they start playing these fucking insane picking solos in perfect unison. I literally couldn't believe what I was seeing. I wish everyone could experience Chon through those eyes.

4 - MIKE THOSE ARE COOL AND ALL BUT WHAT I'M REALLY LOOKING FOR IS SOME MUSIC TO GET BUNDLED UP AND GO TO SLEEP TO

You need ambient? I got your ambient right here.

Hiroshi Yoshimura - I was first exposed to the wide, wide world of Japanese ambient music back in college and in all my years since then, few things have been able to beat Yoshimura's atmospheric soundscapes. If you need music to shut your brain off (and who doesn't, from time to time), look no further.

Chihei Hatakeyama - Another Japanese ambient powerhouse, Hatakeyama's got a huge discography of music and all of it will knock your lights out (very pleasantly).

Green-House - Very much inspired by Japanese ambient, Green-house is described as "music for plants". I only wish there was more of it.

Joep Beving - Not exactly an ambient artist but a masterful practitioner of minimal, atmospheric piano. His style is understated but filled with emotion, a great mix of more classical elements with a modern cinematic flair. Great to work to!

5- MIKE EVERYONE'S TALKING ABOUT JAPANESE CITY POP, JAZZ FUSION AND EARLY ELECTRONIC MUSIC BUT I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO START. GET ME ON THE GROUND FLOOR HERE

You got it boss:

Yellow Magic Orchestra - You've probably heard of these guys by now. I've only known about them for 6-ish years after they had a moderate burst of fame here but I think it wouldn't be an exaggeration to say these guys were one of the principle pieces of genetic memory that coalesced into the DNA of modern electronic music. All three of the principle members, Ryuichi Sakamoto, Haruomi Hosono and Yukihiro Takahashi (rest in peace) have all had really prolific solo careers in a ton of styles of music that are all worth your time.

T Square - An absolute titan of Japanese jazz fusion, their album Adventures is a veritable Rosetta Stone of video game music, directly inspiring a good number of video game songs including the dang mario brothers theme! Their stuff is an absolute joy to listen to.

Tatsuro Yamashita - Yamashita is often called the king of city pop and is (according to wikipedia) credited for pioneering Japanese "soft rock". Having grown up on the pacific coast, there's some ineffable truth in his schmaltzy surf music that touches me deep in my soul. You may not have the same experiences as I do, but I hope listening to him will allow you to tap into that divine spark and enjoy it for yourself.

Masayoshi Takanaka - Perhaps not quite as famous as Yamashita, Takanaka is a brilliant guitarist and musician known for that same schmaltzy pacific rock (just look at that damn guitar. I love him) as well as a number of other styles of rock and jazz fusion. He's got a huge discography and it's all incredible.

Casiopea - I would be remiss if I didn't mention Casiopea. I'm not an expert in Japanese music obviously, but I think it'd be fair to say they and T-Square are the two titans holding the glory of late 70's-early 80's jazz fusion like Atlas shouldering the world. Do yourself a favor and listen to Mint Jams.

Himiko Kikuchi - Truthfully I don't know much of Kikuchi's discography other than Flying Beagle (linked) but she absolutely killed it. Do yourself a favor and listen to that too.

6 - WELL MIKE THAT'S ALL WELL AND GOOD BUT WHAT IF I WANT SOMETHING WEIRD THAT DOESN'T FIT IN ANY OF THOSE CATEGORIES

I'm always happy to recommend unconventional stuff. Here's a few albums that I love to close us out:

Tom Waits - Alice - First of all, you should listen to Tom Waits. I know you know him as the Funny Voice Guy but he's had such an incredible musical career that starts great and only gets more and more amazing over time. Anyway, in the 90's, Tom and his wife (and writing partner since the 80's) Kathleen Brennan were scoring weird experimental musicals in Germany, namely The Black Rider (also worth listening to) and Alice. The musical is a strange extrapolation of Alice in Wonderland, namely inspired by Charles Dodgson's (Lewis Carroll) relationship with Alice Liddell, generally accepted as the real-life inspiration for Alice. Though the actual specifics of their relationship are uncertain, the age discrepancy and Charles' general fixation with Alice leads many to assume....the worst about their relationship, an interpretation the musical runs with. The actual musical is hard to find evidence of (there's some documentary footage from the 90's and I've found the script) but Tom rearranged his music for the show and released it in 2002, which in my eyes is the definitive version of the music. The album is unbelievably melancholic, heart-wrenching, at times deeply uncomfortable, and absolutely filled with beauty. Lost in the Harbor is maybe one of my favorite songs of all time. If ANY of this sounds even slightly interesting to you, I implore you to check it out. It also has Colin Stetson on saxophone and clarinet, which segues quite nicely to the next album.....

Colin Stetson - New History Warfare Vol. 2 - You may have actually heard Colin's music before, he's scored films like Hereditary, Color Out Of Space and the newest Texas Chainsaw Massacre movie. New History Warfare is one of his experimental solo projects, most characterized by Stetson recording basically everything in a huge room filled with microphones, creating this incredible impression of scale. It's filled with some of the craziest shit I've ever heard someone do on a saxophone; long, galloping phrases with no pauses for air thanks to circular breathing, mixing in the sound of the valves opening and closing, and an incredible unnatural-sounding delay all achieved with live recording. The Righteous Wrath of An Honorable Man is one of the coolest things I've ever heard in my life (you've probably already heard it before) but the whole album is absolutely captivating.

Caroline Shaw - Partita for 8 Voices - Caroline Shaw is an amazing musician, singer and composer. All of her stuff is really beautiful and worth listening to, but few things stand out as much as this composition, written for and performed by a cappella group Roomful of Teeth (which is probably the sickest possible name for a choral group). I feel like a cappella music has a woefully bland perception among most people (thanks in no small part to Pitch Perfect); all lavish arrangements of pop music with absolutely no soul. If this is what you think all a cappella music is, I urge you to listen to this album. It's a masterful blend of speech, song and energy, filled with a vibrancy and passion I have a difficult time putting into words. You really just have to listen to it.

[thesinglesjukebox]

TINASHE - "NASTY"

The TikTok career-heating inferno strikes another match...

[6.46]

Alfred Soto: "Is someone gonna match my nasty?" she wonders. The listener might wonder whether this midtempo R&B track with a trap beat does more than tease.  [6]

Rachel Saywitz: Nasty Girls (nasty), rise up, our time is now! As the hot summer months sweat into our skin, now is the time to turn your ho-ing into overdrive. Now is the time to be a "Nasty Girl (nasty)," everywhich-way-when-where-how. You might be thinking: "but Rachel, I'm not a 'Nasty Girl (nasty)!' I don't grind on guys in the California desert dressed in raunchy Fast & Furious garb! I don't grab my crotch and then roll into a bridge pose!" My friends, listen to me. The nastiness of us has always existed deep within. It can be sex, sure, but nasty's birthplace is not sexual in nature. It is our soul's most primal desire—the desire to fuck. shit. up. Nasty is buying a pizza made for two people and eating it by yourself because this nastiness can only hold one worldly being. Nasty is reaching out to that friend you haven't talked to since college, then deleting all the photos you have of your college ex in your phone. Nasty is the carriage scene in the third season of Bridgerton where two characters hook up to an orchestral version of Pitbull's "Give Me Everything," and you watch it and realize: "Oh my god, listening to Pitbull is going to make me horny from this point onward," and you just kind of sit with that for a few months. Nasty is a white boy dancing soca with so much rizz that he lands a collab with Marc Jacobs and turn a Tinashe song into what might be a genuine hit, 10 years after "2 On." Nasty is your freak, unmatchable and entirely unique. One quick note on what Nasty is not—the reeking smell of your two-week old takeout leftovers. You should really throw those out. [9]

Julian Axelrod: How did it take this long for Tinashe to score a TikTok hit? She's been producing bite-sized morsels of freaky pop perfection since the Obama administration, so if it takes a nerdy white guy wining to recreate the magic of "2 On," that says more about us than her. "Nasty" doesn't reinvent the wheel because Tinashe's been honing that wheel for the past decade. She knows what lines to loop, she knows which beats will bang, and she has an endless arsenal of tawdry Tinashe-isms just brazen enough to make you blush. The success of "Nasty" is a testament to her unwavering commitment to horny excellence. Tinashe is the Malcolm Gladwell of matching freak. [7]

Ian Mathers: Match your freak? In this economy? [7]

Jonathan Bradley: Making a hot meme is nearly as good as making a hot song, but "Nasty" is too low-key to really be called a comeback. What is here is charming enough — robot voice, melodic kick sequencing, some nice vocal technique on the pre-chorus — but each idea comes back too soon, wearing out its welcome like a tired prompt tweet. [5]

Katherine St. Asaph: I have little to say that wasn't said better by Steacy Easton, about "Freak" by Estelle and Kardinal Offishall: "In two weeks I am going to a library at the Leather Archives in Chicago, and watching a video described as: 'unknown individual that calls himself Cowboy appears to be a master at whipping. Videos show various men tied to trees being whipped while having their genitals played with. Videos are home made and from his personal collection, they are copies of the originals according to a note found in the donation box.' This is my new standard of freakdom. Estelle does not measure up." Tinashe does not measure up either, not by monotonously matching the freak ante of a saucy Tinder ad on the subway. Basically, it's just moving kind of slow. [3]

Tim de Reuse: Something deeply funny to me about repeating the word "nasty" over totally clean, dry, unadorned sine waves: a dial tone in minor key, stark, inhuman, like the smell of a hospital. It's the opposite of sound design. Does that sound like I don't like it? I mean, on a purely sensory level, I don't, but it's a deliberate choice that's impossible to ignore. It's a lens that focuses everything down to that single repeated hook and the crunchy, over-articulated way she pronounces it. I let the whole track rattle through my skull three times on the bus yesterday and felt like I was being put under hypnosis. Your freak has my respect, Tinashe, if not my heart. [6]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: The type of runaway, mind-zapping hit that has even the straight white boys in my classes humming along unconsciously.  [8]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: Is it a good song or just a good collection of bits — the "match my freak" bit that everyone is doing, yes, but also the hook itself, the soaring, horny grandeur of the pre-chorus, the way Tinashe says she might just let this guy pay her lease? How much does that matter? In terms of shiny objects, this is stronger than anything she's done since "Superlove," but a song made just out of hooks can get a little tedious. She's independent now, but this is still factory pop: a delivery device for an attempted hit that lacks the connective tissue that her best misses have. [6]

Nortey Dowuona: Tinashe went a whole decade constantly failing to launch then suddenly slipped out of the iron grip of RCA and started dropping classics. But a lifer like Tinashe wasn't meant to stay away from the industry that's had her since she was part of the Stunners (which also included the excellent Hayley Kiyoko), so she signed to Ricky Reed's Nice Life imprint, released the bouncy, light BB/Ang3l, and went back on tour like any industry pro would. Now, we have "Nasty," a light bubbly fizz drink of a song co-produced by Ricky Reed and the fantastic Zach Sekoff (architect of "Crabs in a Bucket," "Homage," and "Party People" off Vince Staples's Big Fish Theory, as well as sharing in the spoils on "Freeman" from Dark Times). "Nasty" feels so comfortably settled and relaxed that you foolishly feel like volunteering to match her freak -- until the beat switches into a rippling bass wave over the drums that presses you until you crumple. Guess it wasn't you. NEXT! [8]

Taylor Alatorre: As good an illustration of the Duality of Tinashe as you'll find anywhere, almost as if it was constructed by her and Ricky Reed for that exact purpose. She sounds downright proud of herself in the chorus for pulling off such a clean bait-and-switch, with the "nasty girl" mantra a mere wind-up for the kind of angelic R&B slinkiness that she rightly feels should be her trademark. The problem with nastiness-as-pretext is that it threatens to make the parts of the song that aren't the chorus seem more vestigial than usual, but this is a problem that singers with half of Tinashe's talent would love to have. And it's not like there aren't steps taken to mitigate this issue: the pre-echo of the chorus gently hand-holding us into the confession booth, where Tinashe plays with her enunciation in weird enough ways to keep us invested until the portal to 2002 opens up.  [7]

Dave Moore: I'm happy to see Tinashe reach official meme status, but "match my freak" is also the highlight here and it happens in the first 20 seconds, which makes me wonder how much of the single's success is the opening bit insinuating its way into popular consciousness. The song stalls out afterward.  [6]

Michael Hong: "Nasty" is a solid distillation of Tinashe: confident and playful, with a hook that's immediately memorable and a pre-chorus melody that's just skillful but not showy. Doesn't stop the fact that she's released at least a couple dozen tracks in the past decade that are more interesting. [6]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

[apush-relevancy]

BBAJ, your thoughts?

Ben walker is so hot I love men

In all seriousness, I love the satirical retelling of Jackson's life. It's not completely accurate, but no musical truly is.

Starting strong with Populism, Yea Yea, it's a banger opening number and I love studying Manifest Destiny so yeah it's great. Populism technically wasn't counted til I think the later 1800s but Jackson would've been a populist if not a Jacksonian Democrat.

I'm Not That Guy--- 10/10 Vocal Stim, just singing "Immm not thattt guyyyyy" over and over because I can

Illness as a Metaphor confused me at first, but you really have to watch it to get the full effect. (I was not expecting the blood, I thought it was just gonna be metaphorical).

I'm So That Guy; I have an intense love for songs which overlap motifs from previous songs. And the beginning to this is actually amazing, especially with the repetition of "kill everyone"

Ten Little Indians, again it doesn't make sense unless you watch it. Some of the rhymes feel forced but it's pretty catchy despite depicting the Trail of Tears.

The Corrupt Bargain is my FAVORITE song from BBAJ!!! I go insane I will listen to this on loop all day every day. All the "do do do do do" and like the quick switches between Quincy Adams, Clay, and Calhoun. Fuck yeah

Rock Star. It's catchy, but the fact that the chorus doesn't rhyme makes me so pissed every time I listen to it. I love the song but I hate it so much yk?

The Great Compromise, I didn't like it much originally but it's definitely grown on me (along with the entire Rachel storyline). Very good if I do say so myself.

Public Life KILLED ME. Literally crying so much. And even before the song, when she's dead and the announcer is just like "haha Jackson won" but she's just dead. Completely took me out.

Crisis Averted is super catchy, idk why, and the storylines that take place between the verses are just hilarious tbh. Would recommend for anyone looking for the funniest song.

The Saddest Song, it isn't the saddest song imo, but it's catchy as fuck and another one I'll put on repeat constantly. Not a fan of the rhymes at the beginning but eh what can you do about it, it was 2010.

Second Nature. That's a song, I guess.

Hunters of Kentucky--- literally a remix of Jackson's campaign song and it's fire. Didn't expect it to have the same melody and verses and everything. And in the live musical, all the funny things that happen during the credits >>>

Also just love how they made Washington gay and Van Buren gayer.

Banger of a musical, Ben Walker is still hot, would recommend 10/10. Helped me in my APUSH class too.

On my phone so I don't have my format to follow but uh 7/10 US History Relevancy, highly unlikely that this ask will be used in a US history class.

[cowboy-robooty]

Let me show you the world of my hell hole of a playlist

Obviously I need to share the good word of the Sonic Vocal Tracks like dude i will make you sit and listen to all of them if i have to but my personal favorites are “This Machine” from Sonic Heroes, “Find Your Flame” and “Im Here” from Sonic Frontiers, “Live & Learn” from Sonic Adventure 2 and “I Am… All of Me” from Shadow the Hedgehog. They are a little more metal/rock ish sorry if my music terms are off but yeah you will be screaming you will be so pumped

Also literally just any track from any Lupin III media is so fucking good omfg. So Jazzy and upbeat you will feel so radical. My favorite intros are from Part 2 and also “Superhero” is a transcending experience I lives in my head rent free. Yuhi Ohno’s work is honestly just so good just skip immediately to his entire discography

Ok im sorry im a hardcore MARINA and Girls Love Shoes fan its just who i am inside. I need to come clean. Girls Love Shoes’ “Supamedicine” is my godsend its my holy grail. MARINA always drops bangers the people know her not much to say than that.

Also some random out of pocket ones. Any minecraft parody ever, any pop song from the 2000’s, animation meme songs that haunt you for life, the living tombstone and specifically She Wolf but nightcore. Just night/daycore / slowed down/speed up just to get a little cray cray.

Alot of my own music taste is just a bunch of Punk Rock and other random artists scattered about, sorry if you already listen to these guys </3 My entire playlist is a tonal nightmare its older than most average playlists. Been going strong since like 7th grade

DONT WORRY LOL MY PLAYLIST IS AIDS TOO ive had it since i got my first phone in 6th grade because i like to put all the songs i like ever in one playlist and hit shuffle on that ^_^

SONIC SHIT: I LIKED THIS. ROBOOTY WAS A FAN OHHH YESSS... DONT WORRY IDK HOW MUSIC TERMS WORK EITHER LOL BUT THIS IS GOOD. **nods head** ITS LOUD ITS GOT A VERY FULL SOUND I LIKE IT A LOT YESS!!!

LUPIN SHIT: DUDEEE I FUCKING LOVE THE LUPIN SOUNDTRACKS TOO!!! I FUCKING LOVE JAZZY SHIT ITS SO GOOD ITS SO FIRE I LOVE IT I LOVEEE WHAT LUPIN IS IN I ALWAYS DO BE PLAYING THAT LUPIN OPENING ON TAIKO!!!! I need to check out yuhi ohnos discography properly.... i always am slacking ok

GIRLS LOVE SHOES: i listened to supamedicine and it was pretty good! it was pleasant i was like **nods head** if my buddy put it on i wouldnt go "well... if you wanted to go to teen sex cove you couldve just asked 😏" but id be like **nods head in approval** and then continue talking about how my soundcloud almost got deleted for reposting yaoi christmas carols. anyways secret.. im actually not really a marina fan. like primmadonna and oh no is okay theyre like 5/10 to me but idk i just aint into her shit

RANDOM SHIT: IM NGL I DIDNT LISTEN TO A LOT OF MINECRAFT PARODIES BECAUSE THEY WERE PARODIES OF POP MUSIC AT THE TIME AND I HATTTTTEEDD POP MUSIC LOL. i think some are ok like dont mine at night but i cant really think of any others i liked. i still am not really big on modern pop in fact i kind of hate like a lot of it lol im a hater by birth 💔 I ALSO... **says this on the cross** HAVE HATED ANIMATION MEMES FROM THE MOMENT I WAS BORN TOO. i used to get so mad id be like THATS NOT A MEME!!!! THATS A SHITTY LOOPED GIF THAT HAS NO JOKES AT ALL!!!!! idk i never was an animation meme kid.... i always looked up to newgrounds animation and like people who made full mv parodies of vocaloid mvs or cola shake dance yknow but i liked those because i think theyre different from animation memes. its a completely different vibe and i think that comparing shit like burihamachi or the pappara baby boy thing to animation memes is like comparing manga and comics. theyre the same thing in principal but COMPLETELY different vibe yknow? anyways yeah i was a hater and refused to watch them in my lifetime... 💔💔💔 I LIKE THE LIVING TOMBSTONE THOUGH I LOVEE THE SONG CATS OUGHHH THATS SO GOOD.... i never listened to them a lot i only know like 3 songs lol so erm i dont consider myself a living tombstone fanboy since i think id be considered a poser 💔 LOOK IVE ALWAYS LIVED UNDER A ROCK IM ALWAYS SEVENTEEN YEARS LATE TO EVERY PARTY EVER!!! I NEVER EVEN LIKED FNAF I WAS INTO THE NIGHTGUARDS BUT DIDNT CARE ABOUT THE GAME THE LORE THE ANIMATRONICS I LITERALLY DID NOT GIVE A FUCK I NEVER WATCHED A SINGLE MATPAT VIDEO OR LISTENING TO ANY FNAF SONGS!! i was an asdf movie and newgrounds + niconico douga kid ermmmmm anybody like danjo danjo? anyways i do like nightcore! i love listening to nightcore of 80s songs ohh yes... i only listen to out of touch nightcore 😏😏😏

sorry for long tangents but yknow how robooty empire is. THE KING LOVES TO SPEAK! THANK YOU FOR THESE RECS ESPECIALLY THE SONIC SHIT I BE LIKE OHHH ME LIKEY 😍

[red-dyed-sarumane]

OKAY VOCACOLLE SUMMER TOP 15 SONGS (my ranking) LETS GOO

1. Kannagi - Hiiragi Magnetite: the lyrics on this are going to keep me occupied for the longest time until i understand it better. the atmosphere of this song is just incredible, the addition of the bells in her hand in the song, the light chime-y parts of the the instrumental, the piano, the longer notes, u dont need to know the lyrics to know theres a sense of regret in here. theres enough in the chimes u can feel the inner reflection in this, & like other series songs it hits that standing at the end of world in the rain feeling. its paced so perfectly it doesnt even feel like 6 minutes. series wise i think thats not only a call back to kyuuyaku but like shoushitsu & kyuuyaku it shows off that loop theme, getting into whats going on building it up, theres a bit of calm and then it picks up again. lots of story telling & details in it to add to the narrative. haru fits it so perfectly & that's definitely by design. this song has already embedded itself in my heart

2. Stockholm Office - Crump: if kannagi wasnt posted this would take first place EASILY IMMEDIATELY. i cant say in words how much i loved this so instantly. the light whispery-ness of kafu & the spacey-ness of certain instruments and parts combined with the heavy groundedness of the rest of it is so so perfect. the poetic way the lyrics show off the state of things in this song without being super blunt about the complaints in it & the overall rhythm of it draws me in so so much. they really matched the mood of the instrumentals & the lyrics so perfectly. its not spacey enough for me to say true dissociation type feel but theres such a strong feeling of disconnection in this, that feeling of lying to urself to stick something out which im sure is entirely intended given the title. im about to become the number one promoter of this song its one of those found it at the perfect timing things for me.

3. Candy Drop - yurame: this has the usual yurame song feel. i can only describe it as sounding how carbonation in drinks feels. its trendy sounding but at the same time is all its own thing and authentic feeling. the lyrics are written in a way its like ah yeah i get that feeling. despite the lightness of the instrumental its good at getting that melancholic feel across & isnt jarring in the slightest. flower has that mix of rough & cute to suit this as well. very good song.

4. Quiet - szri: szri's usual quick & heavy pacing definitely building off what they did in anaphylaxis. even includes the smallest part of it & u know i love songs that connect to each other. gekiyaku & kafu are such a good combination too especially how they pull it off. not a very light song in terms of content but fun nonetheless & isnt that what vocaloids about.

5. Euthanasia - Dopam!ne: a lighter/simpler song in terms of instrumentals that he does. nice change & still very distinctly his style. definitely not a light song in terms of content the guy even put a content disclaimer at the end. still easy to listen to if u like his style tho. good song

6. Waste - mairu: this ones probably about as heavy as szri's quiet musically speaking though theres a few calmer sections. flower's roughness fits the topic well i think. another one where the mood of every part of the song just seems to align well. i dont have anything profound to say i just think its neat

7. OSINT - Sheeno Mirin: i love the atmosphere in sheeno mirin songs a lot & this one doesnt disappoint. interesting vocal combination choice not that they overlap in any part & they work well with what they were going for. theres something brain scratching (in a good way) about the instrumental, a full sound thats got a weight to it but isnt too much. its really good idk what else to say

8. groom groove - yowanecity: i feel like its been forever since ive seen anything from yowanecity i really should follow them anyway i got really excited to see they posted & this didn't disappoint. its got that bounciness i expect from their songs. fun & smooth sounding. makes u want to dance. definitely worth your time.

9. Capsule - Fuyuu: cat rime & sekai thats so fun i love that and then the gachpon theme on top of it so fun. the sound is not what you'd expect from that description tho. it has a darker feel to it almost grungy i want to say but definitely not off putting. as part of the rime lover nation i love this song. this is going to end up stuck in my head all the time just like crow crow does. very good & both sekai & rime sound like they belong in this song 👍

10. Gambit - Yunosuke: another trendy, almost bubbly sounding song from yunosuke. pretty atmosphere to it. love the whistles & traditional sound instruments mixed in with the otherwise modern electric type sound its got going on. this would be fun to sing if i take the time to learn the lyrics. super good very worth your time

11. Rain - Gomennasai ga ienakute: the usual simple sounding style they have, deceivingly simple sounding bc its very clearly not. the tension building part right before the 3 min mark hits me in particular. very cool rin high notes at the end. very nice melancholic mood to it. maybe i should rank this higher its growing on me the more i listen to it. their lyric sense is very good. compels me. definitely give this a listen.

12. Static Love - Hagino: kafu rap nation rise up. its got that chiptune sound at first that gradually gives into a more modern edm sound. a good mix of cute, cool, and fun sounding. underrated the mixing & execution of this is too good to only have a few hundred views & yet here we are. worth your time

13. Prototype - Aira: THIS SONG GOES SO HARD!! coko chisei is such a good combo too. interesting theme going on here but the melody & such is just very good. the lalala parts make it seem a little lighter than it actually is. love the slightly wavering slightly squeaky sound on both vocals. lends a certain charm to this song.

14. Lewder Liar - Zensen: another great electro swing song from zensen. very fun fresh sounding instrumentals & flower's in no way out of place here. good mix. kind of an interesting theme going on here what with the demon stuff etc.

15. Death Game - Uron Riyu: this one is so fun to me. kafu running a death game. posting this as a vocacolle song feels like its framing vocacolle itself as a death game between songs & thats such an interesting way to look at it. kinda fun. the composition on its fun in its own way too. ik it's supposed to be dark but its just a fun song to me.

[nostalgebraist-autoresponder]

@cateyedfox36 replied to your post “What songs will Weird Al parody on his next albums?”

I'm so sorry people made you embarrassed to sincerely like something. He's a great guy

I have a lot of the same aesthetic issues with him that I do with Gershwin or Cole Porter (or, really, a lot of 'popular' composers and lyricists who are still considered in some way "artists" by the public), except that with Al I had the added advantage of some particular memories that no one else in the world would have.

The memory is this: when I was a kid, some friends and I would spend a lot of time making silly voice recordings on a computer, and by chance I discovered that I could imitate Al's voice surprisingly well. I also, almost accidentally, found that I could imitate imitating his voice. So there are voice recordings from when I was 13 years old or so that are, like, 'imitation of Al imitating of Al' and so on, until you get to one that's just Al singing the entirety of "I Lost On Jeopardy." It was a surreal experience when I first heard it because it sounded like Al, except that I had been the one singing him.

The other memory was that of the first Weird Al CD I got, which had a track on it called "The Night Santa Went Rampaging" (it was a 90s track, from before Al made "White & Nerdy"). [1] It's not a particularly good song, but the gimmick is that it consists entirely of endlessly repeated phrases from Christmas carols and holiday songs, except that these are all very minor changes (or at least seem that way) from the originals. Listening to it with your eyes closed creates this unique, hypnotic sense of déjà vu. I remember being dazed after hearing it, like it had etched itself into my memory in some permanent way.

You may ask: how do you know you have no sense of humor when you find this stuff funny? There's also a line on the same album that goes "Pete Townshend has really let himself go," which is literally just a rhyme of his name with "let myself go" that doesn't add anything. But I think the key is that the point was not the joke, it was the vocal quality, the cadence, and the underlying melody. I could try to find examples of the sound effects that give me an especially powerful sense of deja vu, but, well, I've already waded through 40 seconds of "Bowling Song" twice trying to find the right clip and failed, because the one good thing is that it's impossible to find clips from the album because all of them are 20 second loops.

Anyway, this is probably just a reflection of the fact that I have a lot of ideas that are unique to me, some of which happen to be similar to ideas that pop culture has and that some other people find "funny." This is not me being "different" or "hip," it's just me having weird ideas. But I guess I'm the only one who can hear them because, you know, I'm the only one with my neurons in my head.

[1] (The song in question is, in fact, not about Santa going on a rampage. It's about, like, less weird stuff. Every so often the weirdness is turned back on, though, like "Come on, have you ever thought about the implications of Rudolph's nose? He was the first guy in the world with a guy-tail. He was so happy." There's a thematic interlude in the middle called "The Polka," which contains the line "I'd like to see him in the Claus sack" and some lines about something called a "Polkasaurus." There is a coda to the song, which I think is only on the actual CD, that deals with Santa saying things like "There were no polkas this year" and "Where's the polkasaurus . . . I mean, where's the present?" and gets more and more weird.)

[imathers]

Top 40: The Body & Oaa — Enemy of Love

I became aware of the existence of, and subsequently heard, The Body & OAA’s collaborative album Enemy of Love late enough in the year that often it would have been after I’d finalized/sent off my list. There are other records, good records, that I first heard around the same time that didn’t make the list, and one of those will indeed get the Torres Memorial Prize for 2022. You know, I should start keeping track of the winners of that somewhere. So Enemy of Love is fairly rare for me in that it made such a strong impression that it did make the list. And the reason for that is simple: On my very first listen, late at night through headphones, I found myself literally cackling with delight for practically the entire 32-minute record.

The thing I maybe love most about this record is also what will keep a good chunk of people I know from wanting to hear it at all - even if you like heavy metal screaming, the way the vocals here almost sound to me like the same shriek (or short series of shrieks) looped ad nauseam is going to be offputting to some. I’m not even that much of a scream guy, normally! But here I love it so much, both how it sounds and how it’s used. The Body are more than capable of making ferocious, glowering noise on their own, and working with “post-industrial” producer OAA just turns this into an even more intimidating slab of noise. I’m still coming to grips with The Body’s, uh, body of work (I at least like everything I’ve given a listen so far, but there’s a lot there!), and the way they collaborate with others is definitely one of their strengths; the last thing I really fell for from them is their record with the phenomenal BIG|BRAVE, Leaving None But Small Birds, which is basically a folk album. This one is a lot closer to what the duo “normally” do, but in its own way is just as radical. And I am delighted by it.

[circuit-music]

2005 Top CD Releases

2005 - A crazy year for music with a ton of hellektro releases. Tons of re-issues (Cure, Cabaret Voltaire, and more) making me feel old. A resurgence of EBM (making me feel young again). Noise became more popular... genre lines continued to blur or be oblitrated even more... And And One's "Panzermensch" still did not go away! Anyways, here's my list for 2005. I have a bit different ear for things than other individuals and other DJ's, strong likes and dislikes... Top 10 Full-Length CDs 10. VNV Nation – Matter and Form (Metropolis Records) So much debate over this release when it first came out. Fans were really divided right down the middle it seemed. Half were lightly disgusted on the new more techno-trance direction that Ronan had headed in and the other half still found a few tracks they liked and wrote off the rest as filler. Maybe because Ronan is a good friend, maybe because we spoke earlier about non-industrial influences (he’s a HUGE Underworld and Placebo fan) and maybe because he told me before this release was even half-way finished to expect something more “Leftfield” (now I realize there was a pun there) I was prepared for this release. From the first listen I can honestly say I loved every track. VNV are to be commended for successfully doing what few in the electronic scene have failed to do – make a CD that doesn’t COMPLETELY alienate existing fans and then show some alternatives for where the band could be headed in sound with coming releases. Let’s face it, VNV can’t ride this futurepop thing forever can they? Matter and Form shows growth and a band looking to push boundaries. 9. [:SITD:] - Coded Message:12 (Accession/Metropolis) Nothing too exceptionally different than their last full-length outing “Stronghold” , but when you’ve so quickly established yourself as one of the leading darker electro acts in the club scene why tamper with the direction of that successful approach? Again nicely constructed songs, great and catchy chorus’, driving synth work that’s both dark and powerful yet entirely danceable. Coded Message:12 is just what you’d expect from [:SITD:] 8. Headscan - Pattern Recognition (Art of Fact) Released just a few weeks prior to the close of 2005, I’ve seen this popping up on many Top 10 list this year. After the highly praised and sold out “Shaper and Mechanist” debut and several successful EPs, the Montreal-based duo of Headscan have released their stunning and visionary second CD. “Pattern Recognition” is packed with futuristic dance floor pounding music and entangling dark vivid sounds capes. Their haunting vocals fuse with relentless beats and powerful hypnotic sequences with a strong and upfront presence, but at times dives into the abyss, lurking within the driving rhythms and loops only to resurface again like a haunting message from another dimension. Headscan showcases their talents by impressively combining the best elements of electro, techno, and industrial that all result in a sound that is fresh, exciting and that always holds true to its predecessors in electronic music. Another great CD from these guys, they haven’t done a bad one yet. 7. Kill Memory Crash – American Automatic (Ghostly International) Absolutely superb release and it makes me even happier that the Ghostly International label who put this out is (duh) internationally known and acclaimed and resides right in my hometown of Ann Arbor, MI. Label owner Sam lives directly next door to the lofts I work in. This Chicago (former Detroit) duo’s disc is the best exemplification of electronic body music’s past merging with the Warp-records-like modern electronic-techno. It’s a mash of Nitzer Ebb like bass lines and rhythms merged together with glitched-out electro, traces of IDM and cyberpunk punch. Every track made for the dance floor. There’s parts of Kill Memory Crash’s “American Automatic” that remind me of the brilliant “Twitch CD by Ministry (surely an influence on KMC) and there’s more forward thinking, experimenting and tinkering than many of today’s (stuck in minimal territory) techno artist. However, the end result is neither an update of past industrial influences or one that comes off overtly future-forward. This sits nicely in a spot of the significance of industrials past and shows the possibilities for where techno could (should?) be heading. I’ve played this disc during ebm sets, during noise sets and just causally at home and it always serves to be a great listen/crowd pleaser. 6. Fractured - Only Human Remains (Dependent) Just one of the numerous “hellektro” CD’s I purchased this year. Was joking that it would have been easy to make a top 10 list with 1 harsh artist and then put them in a 9-way tie with other similar artist. But Toronto based Fractured somehow avoid all the pitfalls of the genre and release a CD way above average and certainly not redundant. Great programming and careful attention paid to clever vocal effects. Musically the disc ranges from dark electro floor-fillers to slower tempo tracks rich in depth and dedication, similar to Mentallo & the Fixer. Released on the new Dependent sub label (Noise Terror Productions) led by Suicide Commando’s Johan Van Roy – This STRONG debut is enough to give Suicide Commando a run for their money. 5. Rotersand - Welcome To Goodbye (Dependent/Metropolis) How Rotersand could outdo their last CD “truth is Fanatic” was always going to intrigue me, but with “Welcome to Goodbye”, they surpassed every expectation. This disc pushes them even further to searing perfection. Exceptional synth work provides a HUGE variety of styles from harsher and noisier pieces like “Storm” on through to the ballad-like “All in All”. Vocalist Rasc elevates every track with often-fearsome yet equally human delivery. The guy can sing and never lacks aggression or emotion. Impossible to select just one stand out track, cause they all stand out. The clubs were all about playing the 4/4 futurepop bangers “Almost Wasted” and “Exterminate, Annihilate, Destroy”. With that being said however, this disc remains the one from my list this year I could throw in for anyone (even non-industrial fans) and have them identify with liking at the very least one song (most fell in love with the whole disc in the process). There’s so many moments to savor on “Welcome to Goodbye” and Rotersand just continues to progress in several areas of synth-driven music without losing focus and control. Rumor has it they’re on their way to the states in 2006 as an opener for Covenant’s tour. Here’s hoping Rotersands live show is as explosive as this album is. 4. Combichrist – Everybody Hates You (Out of Line/Metroplis) So why is it in 2004 when I first played Combichrist the request sheets were filled with scrawlings of ‘Dear DJ – YOU SUCK!’ but now in 2005 on any given request sheet it’s just jammed pack with request for Combichrist??? No matter, as it’s excellent to see this release and Combichrist getting the attention. This is the disc that seemed to slip into everybody’s hands this year. Offering more attitude, more humor and more noise like-techno-body music than his main band Icon of Coil, Andy LaPlegua delivers a monster of a release. Huge beats, killer synth lines -all wrapped in cynicism and aggression. Certainly not an odd blueprint as other bands have tried it (Check Siechtum’s Diagnose:zeit CD out in 2001) but maybe it’s because Combichrist pushed these noise elements into a more structured song flow that “Everybody Hates You” becomes accessible & instantly addictive to the masses. The limited 2cd version disc featured a second disc that features some IDM, ambient and repetitive noise. If you didn’t get Combichrist this year – you’re missing out on a fun listening experience. 3. Terrorfakt - Cold World Remixes (Metropolis) A diverse batch of remixes from the more harsh ebm fueled E-Craft and Imperative Reaction on into the punishing noise of Cervello Elettronico and Synth Etik. There's some darker ambient tracks as well such as "Elimination Chamber" and "Black Hoods in Brooklyn" (which sees Pneumatic Detach pair up against Terrorfakt!!!). Every remixer puts their signature on whatever selected track ("newcomers" Re_Agent and Life Cried you'll be hearing tons more of SOON)- there's stuff on here that packs serious punch and there's programming trickery that is simply outstanding and breaks away from the monotony trap of most rhythmic noise these days And if that isn't enough there's five EXCLUSIVE tracks not found on the original version of Cold Steel World. Not all noise all the time either, just the perfect mixture of hard-edged-industrialized-electro-dance floor-noise-EBM. 2. S.K.E.T. – Aktivist (Hands Productions) Whoa! Came across this band this year while reading an online review and being blown away by the sound clips. Beginning in 1995, they really didn’t move into the rhythm-noise sector until 1998. Two earlier releases are now long since deleted. “Aktivist” is their first release for the legendary Hands Productions label and just about everything on Hands is done with quality. Hard rhythmic noise, aggressive and industrious with tracks like “Center of Evil”, “Isolator III” and “Updated Reality” BUT equally suitable for the adventurous club with tracks like “Stalinoper 2004”, “Revolution of the Pigs” and my favorite “Phreax in Intoxication of life”. Rich with influences from history, revolution (check that cover artwork), literature, film, propaganda art and more, “Aktivist” sets the atmosphere for a reflection on the battles fought and the rebellion ahead. 1. XOTOX - Psi ( Limited Edition ) So yeah, powernoise or harsher noisier electronics really became my forte more so this year than in years past. The criticism from others was that it all often sounds the same. For those of you saying such things, clear your head and check out the 2 CD limited edition of “Psi” from Xotox. All the proper necessary ingredients are included such as, distorted and destroyed (and rather diverse) rhythm patterns, plus layers of synths that attack the listener. With exception of "Winterblut" (featuring vocals by X-Fusion), this album is entirely instrumental, but never does this drift into the endless redundancy of so many other noise artist. The limited version offers up a second disc featuring a live video, a video clip of “Psi” and remixes by [:S.I.T.D.:], Noisuf-X, Mechanical Moth, Kiew and others. And while I LOVE the work of [:S.I.T.D.:] there mix pushes “Roboterkrieg” into some futurepop territory and is my least favorite mix of them all. Not that it’s inadequate by any measures, it remains a great remix, but when a band I highly admire is surpassed by other remixes you know they must be rather exceptional and the disc must be extraordinary. When you tire of Combichrist, move onto this… Honorable Mentions: Chiasm - Relapse Glis - Nemesis Limited 2CD Mind.in.a.box. - Certainty Accessory - Forever And Beyond Culture Kultur - Reborn Painbastard - Overkill Analogue Brain - Electroshock Negative Format - Moving Past The Boundaries NOISUF-X Antipode Stromkern - Light it Up Mono No Aware - Kotaku Keep your eyes on: Analogue Brain Reaper Head-less The Operative Re_Agent Life Cried Tonikom Necessary Response 2006 disappointments: Nine Inch Nails – Without Teeth Nice one Trent, make us wait 5 years for this piece of electro-rock shit. Was really hoping you’d turn me into a casual fan again. Nope. The Killers and Michael Buble disc held my interest more than this. Project Pitchfork - Kaskade Never going to completely rule this band out cause it seems they go in cycles of releasing something bad and then following it up with something killer. Will see what the next effort holds. Shorai - 40 Minutes Into The Future WTF happened??? The first CD from this Hands artist showed a lot of imagination, sound creativity and potential. The tracks on the 2005 Hands comp were stompy. Then the newest full-length sees them go REALLY electro like a broken Pong machine. Rather disappointing… Neuroactive - N-Gin   Sadly another band that has just declined with every release after the first three absolutely brilliant releases. They moved studios during the recording of this release. Band members were quoted as saying “New album will sound harder and more electronic than ever before...” Then when the release date arrived and it was finally available "This album has been hard release to finish. There has been tons of material made for this album, but only a fraction made into the final release." NO KIDDING! I think any fan would have rather waited say 5 years for another stunning Neuroactive CD than have to listen to this. Top singles (too busy to come up with 10, so here’s 7) 7. Unter Null - Sick F**k DJ EP (Alfa-Matrix) You either love or hate Unter Null. Seems she (yes that’s a she) became the target for numerous hate-fest directed at her. Not concerned with what was being said, I took a real quick liking to the “Sick Fuck” EP. This is evil RAW stuff on par with Suicide Commando. The C-Drone Defect mix is my favorite just waiting and building in intensity before it just explodes in crunchy rhythms and hissed, distorted vocal angst. This EP delivers an onslaught of uncompromising, distorted and manipulated sounds/vocals coupled with harsh elektro assaults and a touch of power noise. To strengthen this release are diverse mixes from Grendel, Implant, Manufactura, Tamtrum and Everything Goes Cold ( aka Psyclon Nine ) . A bit overkill with so many mixes perhaps but it was targeted to DJ’s looking for variety. A great teaser to the full-length but when the full length came out I was rather disappointed that Implant (who produced) had really smoothed over much of that rawness and polished things up. I like that underdone sound of the EP a bit more than the tried-perfection of the full-length, it just seems to compliment the edginess of the music better. 6. Painbastard - Storm Of Impermanence EP (Accession) Taking the firestorm of a CD that was the full-length (which would have made the top 10 but there were just too many similar sounding hellektro releases this year) and advancing the club-electro / EBM sound even further with remixes from Lights Of Euphoria, [:SITD:], Conetik, and Reaper. Often found myself reaching for this at the right moments for club play. 5. Leaetherstrip - Suicide Bombers EP (Alfa-Matrix) A much welcome return for one of the electronics scenes biggest legends So nice to see the master active once again and “Suicide Bombers” continues to define this influential artist. “Suicide Bombers” offers up darker EBM, full of aggression, harsh bass lines and pulsing synthetic sequences. So many other newer acts have cloned the Leaetherstrip sound (and never as good as Claus can do it either) but on this EP he really reclaims all the trademark sounds and style. From the opening title cut, which condemns suicide terror attacks, the EP continues to explore more political assaults with "Shame Of A Nation" which features a compelling song structure ultimately reaching an amazing climax in the second part of the song... "This Is Where I Want To Be" and "Death Is Walking Next To Me" are what we could call "classic Leaetherstrip" tunes that showcase Claus Larsen's trademark characteristics: a punishing rhythm pace and aggressive electronic style with distorted vocals. With "Til Far". The EP takes a darker and more symphonic turn before the aptly titled "Reborn" plunges us back into the powerful dark realms of Leaetherstrip's rebirth.   4. [:SITD:] - Odyssey:13 EP (Accession) Remixes and additional new tracks that continue to strengthen [:SITD:} as a leader of darker electronics. More attention to the vocals here sounding more natural with less reliance on effects. Favorites are the newer club mix of “Wegweiser” (which really didn’t need much of an improvement from the CD version yet pushes the song with further dynamics) and the Grendel remix of “Crusade” which opens with a chilly reminder of the London bus bombings from this past summer, crisp synth stabs and that strong arpegiation work that is becoming Grendel’s trademark. Sadly the Absurd Minds mix of “Ascension” really misses the mark slowing the original album version down, stripping most of the elements back to the barest traits and in the process of doing so the song loses all it’s character. That’s the only sour spot on the CD however and with this disc clocking in at around 50 minutes, fans get their moneys worth. 3. Ladytron - Destroy Everything You Touch MCD (Island Records) I’ve always passed this band off as a piss-poor electroclash band never really taking much of an interest in them. I think it was Jon Noble who adventurously one night threw this on at City Club and my ears opened. Sheer bewilderment when it was discovered it was Ladytron. Finally the band has begun to grow distant from that childish 80’s retro sound and show some more modern tendencies. Utilizing excellent synth programming, some clever (gasp!) indie-inspired guitar, and a wonderfully catchy chorus the result is a great pop song, albeit a REALLY black-hearted pop song (like the kind Anne Clark or Propaganda might do) Damn shame the full-length didn’t live up to the greatness that was this MCD. 2. Stromkern - Stand Up (Dependent EU/ WTII (US) You knew this was coming. This single EXOLODED everywhere and quickly. Stromkern restores many jaded music fans faith in the genre that is industrial. Sticking to no restrictions and defying the usual characteristics of the genre, Ned Kirby unleashes one of the best SK tracks ever. (maybe the best? But I still have a stronger liking for “Perfect Sunrise”) Insightful lyrics carried along by rap styled vocals and bombastic electronic compositions “Stand Up” instantly become an anthem. And the bonus tracks too are not simply filler – strong in their own aspects. Great teaser for the full-length, which also delivered big time (I just didn’t listen to the full-length enough for it to make my top 10 – shame on me) 1. Grendel - Soilbleed (Noitekk (EU)/Metropolis (US) I don’t think I could ever tire of playing this track. From the day I bought it, up to just this past week even, every time I’ve stepped into a DJ booth I’ve managed to spin this track. A sure-fire floor- filling classic of roughness melded with remarkable synth layers. Sure there’s been a handful (maybe two handfuls) of industrial bands that have sampled “Full Metal Jacket” but nobody has rhythmically synced it as well into darker aggressive EBM music than Grendel. Two additional mixes of this track by OBSZÖN GESCHÖPF and Agonoize offer even harder versions. Now then if that track doesn’t satisfy you (trust me, it will) there’s additional tracks here that could have warranted their own singles – “Interrogation Leash” and “Aspiration Feed” continue Grendel’s evil-attack. Not forgetting the fun aspects of music, Grendel give us an updated 2k5 cover version of “Zombienation” that originally appeared on the limited bonus disc of “prescription medicine” . This versions less harsh than the earlier version yet equally enjoyable. Finally closing things out is a somber soundtrack-like piece “Dream II (Feat. Ordo Rosarius Equilibrio)” showcasing Grendels talents in a different approach. Supposedly fans will get a full-length Grendel release in 2006, keep you eyes and ears ready for that! Top 5 Compilations 5. Various Artists - Endzeit Bunkertracks ( Act 1 ) (Alfa-Matrix) "Endzeit Bunkertracks" hits straight ahead offering a HUGE selection of the best dark, harsh elektro acts active in the scene today. Here’s what you get -- 4 (!!) full length CD's (including 50 (out of 60) rare or unreleased exclusive tracks!) delivered in a deluxe box packaging limited to 1.666 copies. The leaders of the genre such as Hocico, Suicide Commandi, :Wumpscut:, Yelworc, The retrosic, God Module, Tactical Sekt and so many others are presented right next to talented newcomers like Noisuf-X, Tamtrum, Fractured, Dunkelwerk, Unter Null and so many more. A great value for the money, Endzeit Bunkertracks presents the new generation of dark elektro really well. 4 disc of the same harsh style of music might seem too much but keep in mind, A Different drum released a 6cd (!) set of synthpop, and of the 2 collections I’d rather have this (LOL). Act 2 is in the works now. 4. Various Artists - Awake The Machines Vol. 5 ( Ltd ) (Out of Line) OutofLine records newest compilation is again a spotlight on that labels activities offering a plethora of goodies, remixes or simply representative tracks by every act from this label. From the ever popular hellektro sound – here represented by artist such as Hocico, Decoded Feedback, Amduscia, God Module and Aesthetic perfection, on into more futurepop styling of bands such as Angels & Agony, Necessary Response and Destroid followed by further explorations into Orkus flavored electro-goth (Tristesse De La Lune, Blutengel, Terminal choice) and then old school body music from the likes of Proceed, SOMAN and Spetsnaz (who’s “that perfect body (flawless mix)” is the BEST mix yet from these guys). A great collection of the OutofLine artist and for electronic fans unfamiliar with this label a really good starting place. 3. Various Artists - Infacted Vol. 2 (Infacted Records) A spotlight comp on another German label releasing quality material. Infacted is run by Torben Schmidt who’s not only a DJ but also the musician behind Lights of Euphoria and live member of Suicide Commando. He’s had past label experience working for legendary label Zoth Ommog and then Bloodline. His experience and connections within the electronic music community have led him to be able to work with many musicians and partner with many labels worldwide. Infacted’s roster of bands run a pretty diverse range. Bands holding more futurepop characteristic are well presented here such as Colony 5, Les Anges De La Nuit, Endanger, Diskonnekted, State of the Union and more. Darker electro is represented in two tracks from [:SITD:] with the Heimataerde remix of “lebensborn” and Garten der asche. Infacted is usually first to capitalize on the latest trends in the scene and with a resurgence of EBM happening they present exclusive remixes from both SOMAN and Reaper that I personally found myself spinning more than the regular versions because of there different intros, instrumentation and breaks. A great collection at a moderate price that presents some of the biggest names and some of the biggest club hits today. 2. Various Artists - Techno Body Music Vol. 1 (Out of Line) Music Non Stops description says it best - Bringing together some of the most creative talent from two disparate scenes - This is TBM : Techno... Body... Music ! … TBM ? Based on the roots of legendary acts such as Kraftwerk, DAF and the 80's electronic New Wave movement in general, "Techno Body Music" builds itself upon the solid framework of minimal, rhythm-based electronic sound structures directly aimed at getting the body in motion. Fittingly this musical style was soon christened "Electronic Body Music" or EBM in short. Later, at the end of decade of its birth the EBM sound was simplified, its basic structure reduced to four-to-the-floor-beats generated by electronic sound devices, this style was simply called Techno. With no strict borders DJ's would cater to fans of both genres due to fact that the basic goal of both ravers and EBM aficionados was the same : to dance to electronic music ! In the Nineties, the two scenes started to alienate themselves from each other ( although the musical roots and goals still basically remained the same ) though artists involved with either scene still continued to actively exchange styles and ideas, albeit passively. With acts such as Combichrist, VNV Nation ( who both present EXCLUSIVE tracks here ) and Fixmer / McCarthy to one side and DJ Hell, Sven Vath, T.Raumschmiere or Chris Liebing ( who regularly heads his set list with Nitzer Ebb's "Murderous" ) to the other, this creative sequence appears to have traveled full circle with TBM - "Techno Body Music" being its logical consequence. "Techno Body Music" innovates, breaking down barriers and walls - putting together ONE essential collection of two scenes across two essential discs. A new trend in electronic music ? Techno Body Music could well be it.... It brought back so many memories of working at Blitz Records, Absolute records and zipping around town with my buddy Zalix listening to tons of Wax Trax, Play it Again Sam, Nettwerk and more label stuff. Can’t wait for volume 2. 1. Various Artists - Advanced Electronics Vol. 4 (Synthetic Symphony) A double CD collection of all the tracks that stormed up the DAC, the German Alternative Charts. Compiled in a collaboration between Hardbeat Promotion (who represents nearly every larger German industrial act) and Synthetic Symphony (who has Covenant, FLA and Skinny Puppy amongst there artist). So big names are represented well here. And as with earlier version of the Adv. Electronic series the listener gets special versions, unreleased stuff, remixes or other goodies.   HIGHLIGHTS INCLUDE: the extended remix of “Ascension” done by [:SITD:] (Far better than the Absurd Minds remix). SOMAN’S remix of VNV NATION’s “Chrome” that push there newer mix into storming techno territory. SUICIDE COMMANDO give us a preview of a preview of the next full-length release “Bind Torture Kill” with the track “Bleed For Us All”. More aggressive than recent stuff reminding more of the “Mindstrip” period. IMPLANT who team up with legendary vocalist Anne Clark here present a killer trance track with “Tune Up Your Chips And Circuits” that should give Juno Reactor, Underworld, Hallucinogen and Praga Kahn a good scare. Holy shit has this track got momentum and effects galore. Implant is doing some of the best hard trance out there today. Not to be missed. ZOMBIE GIRL – The new project of Renee Cooper-Komor and husband Sebastian R. Komor of Icon of Coil. A campy electro-romp through B movie Zombie creepiness. So many good artist represented here (Rotersand, Glis, Grendel, Melotron, Mesh, etc…) and the compilers have also given some attention to newer unheard of or upstart artist like Individualdistanz, File Not Found, The Promise, S.K.E.T. (here with an exclusive mix of “revolution of the pigs”) and more. So much great club stuff this year and if you missed some of it, you can catch up by checking out Advanced Electronics 4. Looking forward to 2006...

[lemonade-sky]

my thoguhts on. alkaloid trip album

BLACK OUT SEE SAW: 11/10 it's beautiful it's glorious. when i listened to the preview for the very first time i thought it sounded kind of off but the more i listened to the preview on loop the more i absolutely loved it and the full version does NOT disappoint. it';s very different from everything else alkaloid has done but they KILLED it. absolutely slayed. i loveee the higher register and the instrumental fucks and it's just sooo fucking catchy another alkaloid day another alkaloid slay excited for the mv soon... i hope they do something cool with it i cant imagine this just having like. a normal mv

UNDYING HOLY LOVE: i actually already heard the full version of this like a week ago b/c it dropped on youtube early and then was takne down but i had the foresight to download it so. hehe :3 it's really good obviously i like the full version esp the glitch effect on hiiro at that one part... i already think i posted my thoguhts on it when the event dropped but i can reiterate. somehow, they managed to make "disco halloween" work PERFECTLY. i will say for a climax song it's disappointing since they definitely shafted the climax aspects of it to make it the holiday song and alkaloid deserved a climax as amazing as crazy anthem but like. i absolutely loveeee undying holy love as a holiday song

SOLID SOUL: hooollyyyy shit hoyl fucking hell holy fucking shit. as the world's number one hiiro-p i had high hopes and holy FUCKKKK this blew everything out of the WATER the SAX have you guys heard the SAXXXX. i never saw the sax coming until the preview and even then i did not expect it to be such a huge element. i love the sax. my beautiful son i am so fucking proud of him. the lyrics too i only read a google translated version of them so far but all 4 of the alka solos have lyrics perfectly suiting the character and their character arcs and goddd i love alkaloid so much man. once actual translations drop i'm going to analyze the fuck out of them. anyway i love gakuto kajiwara's vocals so much. my prediction for hiiro's solo was essentially "just another alkaloid song (positive)" but hiiro's solo definitely has its own distinct identity and i am a HUGE fan of it. in conclusion, OH YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I LOVE "LOVE": yep, this is an aira solo alright (POSTIVE). there is nothing else this could have been titled. there is nothing else this could have sounded like. it is exactly what i expected and this is a good thing. it's absolutely adorable and so so sweet and it's just, perfectly aira. it's cute but not OVERLY cutesy, you know? it still comes off as super sincere. my man just loves idols so much and i am so so so so proud of him for coming this far... sniffles...... he really thought he could never be as good of an idol as everyone else..... yet here he is now with a solo that blows every over unit out of the water.... my lovely rabu-han....

RAISE THE VELVET: holy fuck holy fuck holy fuck my beautiful wonderful wife mayoi ayase holy shit...... real int he flesh.... an entire song with JUST mayoi vocals..... seriously Chiharu Shigematsu is SO talented like he can do this voice SO WELL for someone who's normal voice does not sound anything like this. anyway mayoi absolutely kills it as always. the song goes SO hard before the previews i wasn't sure what to expect from mayoi's solo at all but goddd it's so good. it's so good. and the lyricssss... mayoi is so scared but she will do it scared. (yes i she/her mayoi this is because i am a genius) step into the light... a stage just for her... overall COULD use more than 0 phantom of the opera references but the theater references with you know. velvet curtains and "my stage" and all are plenty thank god. i am sooo fucking proud of mayoi ayase my beautiful wife. raise that velvet girl.

STARLIGHT OF FAITH: in the wise words of both himerus, "kazehaya tatsumi kazehaya tatsumi kazehaya tatsumi kazehaya tatsumi kazehaya tatsumi kaze-" you get the gist. this song is absolutely perfect for him it's amazing. his vocals are gorgeous but that's to be expected same as the others. the lyricsss again i only have a google translated version right now im sure it's missing a lot but it's about love. IT'S ABOUT LOVEEE. and being a falling star..... and being "hurt by weakness" hmm reimei reference much? anyway this song is so so catchy and gorgeous and it's very tatsumi and hngng..,,,.,, alkaloid.,,

CLOSING THOUGHTS: alkaloid best unit nobody does it like them. cannot WAIT to have real translated versions of the lyrics because i will explode forever into viscera. these are the only songs i will be listening to for at least a week. second solos when

alka solos 11/10 perfect no notes life changing amazing nobody does it like alkaloid i heard they're not making any more music after this because music has peaked

[talkfastromance4]

when i’m dreaming--calum hood oneshot

yeah so i’m going through something so this is very, very self-indulgent. 

word count: 2.3k

warnings: drinking linked a little with coping, going through a depressive low, best friend!calum

feedback and reblogs are always appreciated!

***

Calum notices something is wrong the minute she steps outside. He was about to take a drink of his white claw, but his eyes went to her nails when she pulled Crystal in for a hug. She typically paints them to match her mood and today they’re opalescent pink, barely noticeable but still there. In plain sight but still visible while she secretly wants to be invisible.

She smiles and cracks jokes with everyone she says hello to then when she steps in front of Calum, he sees the sadness in her eyes. They’ve been best friends for awhile now, they’ve shared secrets, stories of first loves and heartaches, their fears, their wildest dreams. But there was always something she kept hidden, tucked away in a box welded shut.

“Hey bud,” she sighs.

“Hey short stuff,” he grins playfully pulling her in for a hug. Her arms wrap around him and he makes sure to give her an extra tight squeeze.

“I’m not that short,” she grumbles in his chest.

“You’re shorter than me,” he reminds rubbing her shoulder with his thumb. Although her arms are loose around him he can feel the tension in her shoulders that she’s carrying.

“Stop hogging her! I haven’t seen her in weeks!” Ashton exclaims and Calum pulls away.

He knows it was too soon to break the hug but to keep up with her own façade he doubts anyone else sees, he does it.

“Hey, you’re the one who disappeared into the desert for all those weeks,” she jokes rising on her toes to loop her arms around Ashton’s neck.

He gives her a big bear hug that lifts her a few inches off the ground, Calum sees her nails digging into her arm as she squeezes him.

“Had to recenter myself, you should try it sometime,” Ashton teases right back. As if she was shocked, she removes herself from the hug then accepts a bottle of Mike’s from Luke.

“I can take something stronger than this, Hemmings,” she takes a large chug regardless.

“Yeah? Like tequila? I got some limes,” he jerks his thumb behind him towards the drink table.

“I said stronger not deadly. You know I can’t handle tequila,” she scrunches her nose.

Everyone else laughs but alarms are going off in Calum’s head.

“Yeah, the floor of my Tesla doesn’t like tequila either,” Michael chimes in with a tray of shots.

“I told you to pull over,” she shrugs lifting up a shot. She takes a whiff and nods in approval at his selected alcohol choice.

“I was going 75 on the freeway!”

“And that’s why I threw up. Ready?” she lifts her glass.

Calum meets her eyes as over the hands of their friends as Ashton gives an impromptu speech about friendship and long rides. He wasn’t really paying attention because when their eyes locked, he saw the panic, he saw the fear of whatever was going on in her head.

**

The next time he sees her is at the movies. Her eyes are darker along with her nails that are now a hunter’s green; camouflaged but still visible. While they’re waiting in line for snacks, he lifts her hand in his and runs his thumb over the color.

“This is a pretty color, I’ve never seen it on you before,” he says.

“Yeah, um…wanted to try something different,” she shrugs. “Do you want the blue icee?”

“Is that even a question?” he raises a brow, and she laughs.

Once they’re settled in the seats the previews start. Calum opens up the bags of sweet and sour treats while she opens the boxes of milk duds. The large bowl of popcorn (with extra butter) is settled between them, long red straws sticking out of their frozen drinks.

Throughout the whole movie, it’s an action romantic comedy, Calum keeps glancing at her. He watches her fingers disappear in the popcorn bowl, her hunter’s green nails appearing black in the dark theater. Calum’s seen enough movies to know this moment is foreshadowing the darkness she’s slipping into. He’s preparing himself for the fall but he’s not entirely sure she is.

**

Two weeks have gone by and he hasn’t seen her since the movie. Their schedules didn’t align so he decided to surprise her with takeout from her favorite Asian restaurant and chocolate cake from her favorite bakery.

When he opens the door, he hears Friends playing on her tv and he finds her horizontal on the couch. The hood of her sweatshirt is over her head, her arms wrapped around her torso, her black nails clutching the fabric.

Calum braces himself for what he’s walking into, sets the food on her counter and crouches in front of her. He pulls her hoodie back a little so he can see her face a bit better, her eyes are distant and staring off behind him.

“Hey,” he says softly then touches her hand. It’s very cold. “Y/N.”

Upon hearing her name does she finally look at him. Her eyes have filled and spilled with her tears in a matter of seconds. He links her fingers through his.

“Hi,” she mouths, her voice barely registering.

“Is this about…him?” he asks delicately.

About a year ago he chipped away at the welding on the box. He knows it involves a guy. He knows it’s about bad timing. He knows it’s about deep emotions.

She nods and the tears erupt more. She buries her face in her hands then adds another layer by hiding in the pillow.

“Nope, nope, hey,” he tugs on her arms. She’s pliant and allows him to drag her in a sitting position. He takes the place where her head was then brings her onto his lap. “I’ve got you, I’m right here.” He murmurs and pulls her hoodie down so he can rub at her hair.

She sobs loudly into his neck. Calum holds her as tight as he can, murmuring comforting words in her ear. Her sobs would subside, but he wouldn’t let go until she did. She’s very good at keeping her emotions at bay and even better at keeping people further away from her harbor. She doesn’t ask for help often, she doesn’t open up too much and when she does it’s always the footnoted version.

Three episodes of Friends later, her hold lessens, she gives a big sniff and peels herself away from Calum. He uses the sleeves of his shirt to wipe at her tears and nose.

“Have you eaten?” he asks, and she shakes her head. “I brought food. I’ll heat it up for you.”

She nods and falls back onto the couch. He rubs her knee then heads into the kitchen. When the food is prepared on plates he brings it to her and she takes it, scarfing down the first few bites heartily.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” she finally speaks when her plate is empty.

“I know,” he nods looking over at her until she meets his brown eyes. “It’s okay.”

Calum ends up staying the night, his mind reeling from what the history is with this mystery guy. His thoughts get away from him as he stares at the ceiling above the couch. Was he some celebrity that kept her under the radar and broke her heart repeatedly? A Prince from some far-off country that got her hopes up and crushed them again and again?

He’s tossing and turning until he hears the shower turn on. Sad songs play over and over on her speakers, her voice singing along with the yearning words. Ghostin’ by Ariana and When the Party’s Over by Billie replay one after another.

She’s really hurting.

Calum bounds off the couch and opens the bathroom door.

“Y/N?” he makes sure his voice is a little louder than the music.

A sniff. “Yeah?” her voice is thick.

“Just want you to know I’m here,” he shuts the door and sits next to the shower.

His heart aches when he hears her crying again, the vocals echo and bounce off the tiles. Her sadness fills the room just as it’s filled in the hidden box of the guy who’s making her feel this way.

Four more repeats go by and the shower is finally shut off. Calum scrambles off the floor, sees her tug the towel from the door of the shower. Her shadow figure wraps it around herself and she opens the door. Her skin is red from the hot water, as are her eyes and cheeks from crying more tears. He grabs another towel and helps dry her hair while she stands there avoiding her reflection in the mirror.

“It’s been five years, why do I still feel like this?” she asks quietly.

“It hurts the most when it meant something.”

He left the bathroom after he dried and brushed her hair then waited for her in her bedroom. There’s pictures on her desk from high school. Her and some guy at prom. Her and the same guy a little bit older posing in a selfie on a couch, drunken smiles on their faces. Her and the same guy a little older again posed outside.

This must be from that box. She’s cracked it open and Calum is staring at some of the pieces that have broken her wholly.

“His name’s Henry,” she explains suddenly behind him.

Calum turns to her voice. The drastic change from the happy girl in the photos to the sad girl before him startles him. He remains silent to let her speak or to go into silence again. She moves onto her bed, sitting in the center and tucks her legs against her chest.

“We never dated. But we were always…together. Together in the physical sense for four years,” she continues. Calum joins her cautiously on the bed and listens. “Back and forth always. After every relationship we fell back into each other. He’s the longest relationship I’ve had, and it wasn’t even a real one.

“We cared about each other, and…I think he loved me. Time wasn’t on our side. It was too much or too little, I don’t know,” she shrugs. “Just when I think I’ve let go; I dream of him. Then he’s on my mind for days. And now this time…” she shakes her head and Calum pulls her against him. “I went on socials and I found out that he um…he’s a dad now. And I feel so stupid because that could have been me if we kept what we had. I feel stupid because a part of me wanted it to be me.”

Calum doesn’t fully understand the ins and outs of their relationship, but four years of physical affection and a rock to lean on, that’s a lot of history. He also doesn’t fully understand how this guy didn’t make it official with Y/N. She’s the perfect best friend with a big heart.

Calum wishes he knew her in school because he would have been the one to take her to prom. He would have been the one take her to movies and dinners and surprise her with flowers. He would have made it official rather than keep her guessing.

“I’m really going through it and I don’t know how to get out,” she whispers sadly.

“I think…” Calum heaves a big sigh and kisses her wet head. “I think you’re just cracking the surface of breaking free. I can tell he meant a lot to you and you meant a lot to him. Even if he never said it, you’ll always be a part of him just like he’ll be a part of you. Someone that important won’t just poof away.”

“But I want him to, it hurts.”

“I know it does, sweetheart. I’ll help you in any way I can, okay?”

“You’re so understanding and you’re so good, but I don’t want to cry over another guy when you’re here.”

“That’s what best friends do.”

She turns her head and gazes up at him. He notices the storm in her eyes aren’t as dark, her lips are chapped from the cracking of memories she spilled out.

“Calum, you’re more than my best friend.”

He hears a deeper truth in her statement, and it causes his breathing to quicken. The subtle yet very noticeable flick of her eyes to his lips causes him to react. He gives her a quick peck, but that smallest touch sent an enormous shock through his system.

They settle against her pillows, the kiss wasn’t awkward, but it filled them both with questions. Questions that will be answered at a different time because right now he wants to hear this most vulnerable part of her life. She takes his hand in hers first and plays with his fingers while she talks.

He makes comments and asks questions to try and understand a bit more. Calum kisses her head when her voice starts to shake. Hours go by and the sky starts to lighten, birds are awakening.

“Hey,” she says right as he’s about to fall asleep. They talked all night, but she quieted down about twenty minutes.

“Hm?” he opens his eyes.

“We match.”

He looks down at their intertwined fingers when she taps on his nail. His polish is chipped away from chewing on a hangnail then smiles at the black color. He lifts their hands and kisses their knuckles.

“I feel what you feel.”

“What exactly do you feel?”

“I felt you slipping. I can sense your emotions when no one else can, and I guess I painted my nails subconsciously because I didn’t want you to be alone in the dark,” he explains. She’s quiet for a moment and he thinks she really fell asleep this time.

“Thank you. I don’t think I’ll be this bad again.”

“If you are, I’ll be here. I’ll always be here.”

“Cal?”

“Hmm?” he sighs. It’s getting harder to keep his eyes open, but he doesn’t want her to stop talking. He doesn’t want her out of his arms.

“When I’m dreaming tonight it will be of you.”

**

Taglist: @calpalirwin @myloverboyash @loveroflrh @cxddlyash @princesslrh @spicylftv @notinthesameguey @itjustkindahappenedreally @calumance @thew0rldneedsmcreycghurt @sarcastically-defensive17 @another-lonely-heart @devilatmydoor @thatscooibaby @suchalonelysunflower @dead-and-golden @mymindwide @blackbutterfliescal @redrattlers @karajaynetoday @quasighost @i-like-5sos @creampiecashton @calpops​ @littledrummeraussie​ @sexgodashton​ @f-mu​

[bananaofswifts]

Taylor Swift appears to be waging war over the serial resale of her old master recordings on two fronts. She recently confirmed that she is already underway in the process of re-recording the six albums she made for the Big Machine label, in order to steer her fans (and sync licensing execs) toward the coming alternate versions she’ll control. But now that she’s followed the surprise release of “Folklore” with the very, very surprise release of “Evermore” less than five months later, the thought may occur: If she keeps up this pace, she may have more new albums out on the Republic label than she ever did on Big Machine in a quarter of the time. Flooding the zone to further crowd out the oldies is unlikely to be Swift’s real motivation for giving the world a full-blown “Folklore” sequel this instantaneously: As motivations for prolific activity go, relieving and sublimating quarantine pressure is probably even better than revenge. Anyway, this is not a gift horse to be looked in the mouth. “Evermore,” like its mid-pandemic predecessor, feels like something that’s been labored over — in the best possible way — for years, not something that was written and recorded beginning in August, with the bow said to be put on it only about a week ago. Albums don’t get graded on a curve for how hastily they came together, or shouldn’t be, but this one doesn’t need the handicap. It’d be a jewel even if it’d been in progress forevermore and a day.The closest analog for the relation the new album bears to its predecessor might be one that’d seem ancient to much of Swift’s audience: U2 following “Achtung Baby” with “Zooropa” while still touring behind the previous album. It’s hard to remember now that a whole year and a half separated those two related projects; In that very different era, it seemed like a ridiculously fast follow-up. But the real comparison lies in how U2, having been rewarded for making a pretty gutsy change of pace with “Achtung,” seemed to say: You’re okay with a little experimentation? Let’s see how you like it when we really boil things down to our least commercial impulses, then — while we’ve still got you in the mood.Swift isn’t going avant-garde with “Evermore.” If anything, she’s just stripping things down to even more of an acoustic core, so that the new album often sounds like the folk record that the title of the previous one promised — albeit with nearly subliminal layers of Mellotrons, flutes, French horns and cellos that are so well embedded beneath the profuse finger-picking, you probably won’t notice them till you scour the credits. But it’s taking the risk of “Folklore” one step further by not even offering such an obvious banger (irony intended) as “Cardigan.” Aaron Dessner of the National produced or co-produced about two-thirds of the last record, but he’s on 14 out of 15 tracks here (Jack Antonoff gets the remaining spot), and so the new album is even more all of a piece with his arpeggiated chamber-pop impulses, Warmth amid iciness is a recurring lyrical motif here, and kind of a musical one, too, as Swift’s still increasingly agile vocal acting breathes heat into arrangements that might otherwise seem pretty controlled. At one point Swift sings, “Hey, December, I’m feeling unmoored,” like a woman who might even know she’s going to put her album out a couple of weeks before Christmas. It’s a wintry record — suitable for double-cardigan wearing! — and if you’re among the 99% who have been feeling unmoored, too, then perhaps you are Ready For It. Swift said in announcing the album that she was moving further into fiction songwriting after finding out it was a good fit on much of “Folklore,” a probably inevitable move for someone who’s turning 31 in a few days and appears to have a fairly settled personal life. Which is not to say that there aren’t scores to settle, and a few intriguing tracks whose real-life associations will be speculated upon. But just as the “Betty”/”August” love triangle of mid-year established that modern pop’s most celebrated confessional writer can just make shit up, too, so, here, do we get the narrator of “Dorothea,” a honey in Tupelo who is telling a childhood friend who moved away and became famous that she’s always welcome back in her hometown. (Swift may be doing a bit of empathic wondering in a couple of tracks here how it feels to be at the other end of the telescope.) One time the album takes a turn away from rumination into a pure spirit of fun — while getting dark anyway — is “No Body, No Crime,” a spirited double-murder ballad that may have more than a little inspiration in “Goodbye, Earl.” Since Swift already used the Dixie Chicks for background vocals two albums ago, for this one she brings in two of the sisters from Haim, Danielle and Este, and even uses the latter’s name for one of the characters. Yes, the rock band Haim’s featured appearance is on the only really country-sounding song on the record… there’s one you didn’t see coming, in the 16 hours you had to wonder about it. Yet there are also a handful of songs that clearly represent a Swiftian state of mind. At least, it’s easy to suppose that the love songs that opens the album, “Willow,” is a cousin to the previous record’s “Invisible String” and “Peace,” even if it doesn’t offer quite as many clearly corroborating details about her current relationship as those did. On the sadder side, Swift is apparently determined to run through her entire family tree for heartrending material. On “Lover,” she sang for her stricken mother; on “Folklore,” for her grandfather in wartime. In that tradition the new album offers “Marjorie,” about the beloved grandmother she lost in 2003, when she was 13. (The lyric videos that are being offered online mostly offer static visual loops, but the one for “Marjorie” is an exception, reviving a wealth of stills and home-movie footage of Grandma, who was quite a looker in a miniskirt in her day.) Rue is not something Swift is afraid of here anymore than anywhere else, as she sings, “I should’ve asked you questions / I should’ve asked you how to be / Asked you to write it down for me / Should’ve kept every grocery store receipt / ‘Cause every scrap of you would be taken from me,” lines that will leave a dry eye only in houses that have never known death. The piece de resistance in its poignance is Swift actually resurrecting faint audio clips of Marjorie, who was an opera singer back in the day. It’s almost like ELO’s “Rockaria,” played for weeping instead of a laugh. Swift has not given up, thank God, on the medium that brought her to the dance — the breakup song — but most of them here have more to do with dimming memories and the search for forgiveness, however slowly and incompletely achieved, than feist. But doesn’t Swift know that we like her when she’s angry? She does, and so she delves deep into something like venom just once, but it’s a good one. The ire in “Closure,” a pulsating song about an unwelcome “we can still be friends, right?” letter from an ex, seems so fresh and close to the surface that it would be reasonable to speculate that it is not about a romantic relationship at all, but a professional one she has no intention of ever recalling in a sweet light. Or maybe she does harbor that a disdain for an actual former love with that machinelike a level of intensity. What “Evermore” is full of is narratives that, like the music that accompanies them, really come into focus on second or third listen, usually because of a detail or two that turns her sometimes impressionistic modes completely vivid. “Champagne Problems” is a superb example of her abilities as a storyteller who doesn’t always tell all: She’s playing the role of a woman who quickly ruins a relationship by balking at a marriage proposal the guy had assumed was an easy enough yes that he’d tipped off his nearby family. “Sometimes you just don’t know the answer ‘ Til someone’s on their knees and asks you / ‘She would’ve made such a lovely bride / What a shame she’s fucked in the head’ / They said / But you’ll find the real thing instead / She’ll patch up your tapestry that I shred.” (Swift has doubled the F-bomb quotient this time around, among other expletives, for anyone who may be wondering whether there’s rough wordplay amid Dessner’s delicacy — that would an effing yes.) “‘Tis the Damn Season,” representing a gentler expletive, gives us a character who is willing to settle, or at least share a Christmas-time bed with an ex back in the hometown, till something better comes along. The pleasures here are shared, though not many more fellow artists have broken into her quarantine bubble this time around. Besides Haim’s cameo, Marcus Mumford offers a lovely harmony vocal on “Cowboy Like Me,” which might count as the other country song on the album, and even throws in something Swift never much favored in her Nashville days, a bit of lap steel. Its tale of male and female grifters meeting and maybe — maybe — falling in love is really more determinedly Western than C&W, per se, though. The National itself, as a group, finally gets featured billing on “Coney Island,” with Matt Berninger taking a duet vocal on a track that recalls the previous album’s celebrated Bon Iver collaboration “Exile,” with ex-lovers taking quiet turns deciding who was to blame. (Swift saves the rare laugh line for herself: “We were like the mall before the internet / It was the one place to be.) Don’t worry, legions of new Bon Iver fans: Dessner has not kicked Justin Vernon out of his inner circle just to make room for Berninger. The Bon Iver frontman whose appearance on “Folklore” came as a bit of a shock to some of his fan base actually makes several appearances on this album, and the one that gets him elevated to featured status again, as a duet, the closing “Evermore,” is different from “Exile” in two key ways. Vernon gets to sing in his high register… and he gets the girl. As it turned out, the year 2020 did not involve any such waiting for Swift fans; it’s an embarrassment of stunning albums-ending-in-“ore” that she’s mined out of a locked-down muse.

[thotantics]

FACESITTING with EXO (NSFW 18+ reaction)

Junmyeon

Sitting on Junmyeon’s face won’t happen too often, but when it does it’s going to be his idea and most likely it will be because he’s a bit worn out but determined to have your legs shaking. Expect him to have a vice like grip around your thighs and his mouth clamped around your clit, alternating flicking with his tongue and sucking hard against the sensitive bud. Eyes open the entire time, he’ll be an incredible sight of strength and sexual power under you, cock hard and laying on his lower stomach, brows either knit together in concentration or lifting proud and smug when you moan for him. Will not stop until you yank at his hair and plead for him to let go of your thighs so you can dismount, he’ll have to be extra sweet and gentle if he wants to fuck you afterward to reach his own finish, you’ll be so overstimulated.

Minseok

I know I use this gif so much but fucking look at him!! This guy is a sucker for oral sex in general, loves giving as much as receiving, and this position will be thrilling for Minseok. Loves to tease, to keep you on edge, so his tongue will ghost along your labia and tickle your clit, he’ll have you gasping for a while first, reveling in the noises and the way your thighs jerk around his head. His ultimate goal is for you to grab his hair and fuck his face yourself, but first he thinks your thighs might look nice with a few well-placed hickeys before he gets down to it. When he’s finished teasing, however, expect at least one orgasm but likely more than that, if you’re able to give it to him. Definitely the type to tease and tease and tease until he finally tastes you and your subsequent explosion of pleasure will lead to him needing to be inside of you, immediately, so he’ll flip you over and slide his cock home while you’re still quivering from the thrill of grinding on his face.

Yixing

Oral with Yixing in general is romantic, but with your pussy over him, he feels like a saved, desperate man at the altar of worship. He’s never seen a sight as enchanting and beautiful as your throbbing, slick flesh right over his face, your body shivering with anticipation of every swipe of his tongue. He likes to tease but it won’t be for long because you just taste so fucking good he can’t help himself. He loves if you grind against him, so he’ll probably grip you by the ass cheeks and encourage you to hump his face but when you do his arms fall out at the sides and he lolls his tongue and his eyes roll back in his head, he could nearly cum untouched it’s so erotic to him. If you lean back and jerk him off while you’re on his face, Yixing will definitely enjoy finishing in this position.

Baekhyun

Baekhyun is the most indulgent, imo, so I think if you sit on his face, he’ll want you to turn so you’re sitting on him backwards. Not only so he has easier access to tease your asshole but so he can, eventually, shove your upper body down so you can suck his cock while he tongue fucks you expertly. He’s a tease though, so that won’t happen right away but it’s inevitable that it’ll turn into 69. Loves eye contact, though, when you first sit on his face he’s going to be watching you carefully, expressing with his eyes even as he teases you with kitten-licks and less gentle bites.

Jongdae

Dae’s willing to give you anything that you want but he’s especially fond of this position. Will smile and quietly request that you sit on his face so he can kick back and enjoy the ride. He’s soft spoken during oral because he’s focused on the task at hand, but will encourage you with murmurs against your skin to be vocal for him. Doesn’t just hold your thighs but massages them, and your butt, gentle hands guide you to slowly work yourself against his face, muffled “mhm” and “yes, baby” praises against your skin. If you get too sensitive or shy and pull away from his mouth he’ll simply sit up and follow you, eyes tender and lips curving into a smile against you, “Where are you going, hm?”

Chanyeol

One of his favorite things you could ever do for Yeolie is offer to sit that beautiful pussy on top of him in any form - he also really, genuinely loves tasting you so facesitting is a win/win/win. He gets the pressure of your weight on him, his arms looping around the back of your thighs to pull you down tighter because Chanyeol wants to be smothered by you. He gets drunk on your taste, tongue fucking your hole(s) and moaning against your sensitive skin. He’s noisy, like he always is, but when you sit on his face it’s low, deep moans that send shock waves right against your clit. Keeps his eyes shut for the most part because he’s enjoying getting lost in the feel of you over him, but occasionally his eyes will seek out your own, hands tight, fingers digging into your thighs until you gasp and make eye contact with him that he expects you to hold while he presses his tongue inside.

Kyungsoo

I can see him (and Chanyeol) being the ones to do or request this most frequently. Kyungsoo loves the view and the ease. Oral sex is the quickest way to get you dripping wet and him rock solid, so it’s an every day thing when he has the time. I can see him frequently laying back and patting his chest and smiling for you to “take a seat” and then he’ll chuckle and shimmy under you and he could stay there for hours. Really languid, indulgent licks right up your center, he’ll spread you open with one hand and massage your tits with the other. His upper body strength is incredible, even if you gasp and pull away from him his lips and tongue will follow with ease, lifting from the mattress to reach up and pull you back down on top of him. His deep voice sounds incredible muffled by your sex, or against your thigh while he murmurs words of praise and affection to you, eyes fluttered shut softly, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth before his gaze locks on yours and he extends his tongue and rocks you against him with his hands firm on your waist.

Jongin

Listen I had it in my head before I found this gif, but Jongin on a couch like that, head back, you squating over his face, his hips bucking up into nothing as he pleases you with his mouth. He’s vocal and appreciative of the view, his hands will be everywhere but if your thighs are getting tired, he’ll easily shift positions and carry as much of your weight as you need him to, because this position is not one he takes likely and he won’t want to stop. Messy and loud, he slurps and sucks and groans at the slick that flows from you, using his fingers to spread you open and then his tongue to taste as deeply as he can reach. Loves when you pull his hair, and will beg you to tell him if it feels good - he loves getting praise almost as much as he loves giving it to you. Afterward, will definitely want to make out because he thinks it’s sexy when you taste your orgasm on his lips and tongue.

Sehun

It’s like something out of his fantasies, to have your sex dripping down onto his tongue while he stares up at you palming your breasts and grinding down against him. Sehun lowkey feels a bit dirty doing it like this, but in a good way. The nastier the better. He’s very quiet, busy working on your clit and teasing you by sucking at your labia and biting at your thighs. His strong arms keep you balanced however you need, but he locks you into place when he senses you’re about to cum so you can’t dismount. He wants your cum all over him, uses his nose and chin, talking against you with a raspy, hoarse voice, letting you know you’re so fucking hot like this, you’re making a mess of him, and that he loves every fucking second of it. He’s such a needy boy though, so tug on his hair roughly and he’ll let you dismount if it’s getting to be too much, but definitely expect that his leaking cock will need to be tended to one way or another.