#the vet told me once that fleas would always go for my cats and not me and i was like ??? bc fleas were a concern for my parents re: animals | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

royalswille · 4 years ago

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@ace-bookworm said Button House gets a cat and I said yes and then I wrote this, enjoy.

Buttons’ House

Alison and Mike Cooper had never intended to adopt a cat. After all, Button House was already full to bursting, what with the both of them, eight ghosts living in the main house, an entire village of plague victims in the basement, and the ghost of a pesky pigeon courtesy of their neighbour’s dog. Simply put, there was not enough space to add any more family members to Button House.

So the cat had taken it upon itself to move in.

It had started one morning while Button House was going through its usual morning routine. Alison had woken up, checked the bathroom for ghosts so that Mike could use it without fear, then started the stopwatch for the Captain’s run before putting on a record for Thomas to do his morning dance to. She had filled in a few words on Robin’s crossword, set up Pong for Julian, and put on a classic football match for Pat. In the next room, she had helped Mary with her phonics work, turned to the next page in Kitty and Fanny’s book, and then done the same for Humphrey (or rather, Humphrey’s head – god only knew where his body was). She had arrived downstairs in two minutes and thirty seconds to open the door for the Captain to run in, perfectly timed.

Everything was the same as usual.

“Two minutes thirty, Cap,” Alison said, stopping the timer. “Same as always.”

“Blast,” the Captain said frustratedly. “Are you quite certain of it, Alison? I could have sworn I shaved off a second or two, I really pushed myself on that last corner.”

She shrugged apologetically. “Sorry. I’m just going by what the timer says.”

The Captain harrumphed and peered out the door, beckoning Alison to join him. She did, looking out across the driveway to where he pointed at the gate.

“That’s my problem,” he said, waggling his finger. “The terrain switches from concrete to gravel. If you could just pave over the driveway then I’m quite sure I c– hello.”

The Captain’s tone changed abruptly and Alison raised an eyebrow. “Hello?” she replied, bewildered.

“No, no, not you,” Cap replied, pointing down the driveway again. “Look, over there. It’s a cat.”

Alison squinted and saw that the Captain was quite right. Trotting up the driveway towards the open door, mewing quietly, was a little cat. It was jet black with bright yellow eyes and looked a little tatty with its scraggly fur. As it got closer, Alison could see that its ribs jutted out from under its skin slightly. The cat looked happy enough, but it was very clearly a stray, or badly neglected at the very least.

It stopped just in front of the Captain and sat primly, looking up at him with its eyes squinted serenely.

“Can cats see ghosts?” Alison asked him.

“It would appear so,” he returned. With a painful-sounding cracking of his knees, the Captain crouched down in front of the cat and regarded it. The cat stared back, blinking happily up into the Captain’s face. It attempted to bat at the Captain’s swagger stick, which was hanging from his hands, but its paw went straight through.

“Yep,” Alison said, “it can see you.”

It didn’t appear the Captain was listening to her, because a moment later he pointed his stick at the cat and said, “Now you listen here. It is improper to try and touch a Commanding Officer’s person or belongings. Had you been a soldier – or indeed able to touch me – I should have you punished.”

“Captain, it’s a cat, it can’t understand you,” Alison told him.

He stood up again, knees creaking audibly. “Yes, well. That hardly matters – I am a senior officer and I– oh dear, good Lord, what is it doing now?”

The cat was purring, attempting to rub itself against the Captain’s legs lovingly, but simply passing right through, which only seemed to make it more determined to show the Captain its love. The Captain began to gag, reminding Alison of the ghosts’ inability to touch living things without feeling sick. Quickly, she scooped the cat into her arms and held it close – the Captain stopped his gagging, but the cat continued to purr, nuzzling at Alison’s face.

“It’s very affectionate,” she said through all the fur blocking her face.

“Quite,” returned the Captain, voice a touch more gentle than usual. “Do you think it has a home of its own?”

Alison stroked the cat and frowned. “If it does then it’s not a very good one. Look, you can see all its bones, the poor thing hasn’t eaten in ages. And look at its fur, it’s disgusting. And it stinks.” The cat stopped purring momentarily as if offended. “Sorry.”

“Well,” the Captain said, assuming his usual military-man stance, bouncing once on the balls of his feet, back straight, stick tucked under his arm. “If this creature is in need then perhaps we should provide a home for it.”

“What? No, we can’t do that. Captain, the house is more than full already, we can’t add a cat to the mix.”

“During the war we never left a soldier behind!”

“This is a cat, not a soldier. I’m sure it’ll find a home eventually, just not here.”

As she said it, the cat laid its head upon her shoulder, purring again, eyes closed. It appeared it had decided that in Alison’s arms was the perfect place to go to sleep. Alison had always been a cat person and wanted nothing more than to cuddle the cat, even though it was probably riddled with disease and it stank like rot, but she knew if she did that then the cat would start thinking that Button House was its home. It would start coming back and they couldn’t have that. So with a heavy heart, she gently placed it down on the floor.

“Sorry,” she said to it as it looked up at her sadly. “I’ll feed you just this once because you look like you need it, but that’s it. Right, Captain?”

The Captain muttered something under his breath as he often did when he felt put out, then turned on his heel and left, stretching the way he liked to after his morning run. Alison went the opposite direction, leading the cat to the kitchen to find it something to eat.

It was halfway through the plate of tuna she had laid down for it when Mike came in. He looked down at it, then to Alison, then back at the cat before saying bewilderedly, “I don’t remember getting one of those.”

“That’s because we don’t have one,” Alison told him. She watched fondly as it ate its food – it clearly hadn’t eaten in months judging by the way it wolfed the fish down. “This is a stray, it followed the Captain in this morning after his run.”

“Uh huh,” Mike said slowly, sitting down to watch the cat too. “So why is it in our kitchen?”

“I’m feeding it.”

“Yes, I can see that. Why though?”

“Because,” Alison said emphatically, picking the cat up as it wandered absently towards her, then turning it to face Mike. She held its paws in her hands and wiggled them back and forth like a bad puppeteer. “Look at it! It needed some sort of food otherwise the poor thing would probably die. It’s not like we’re going to keep it, I just wanted to make sure it lived.”

“You remember what happened to my Auntie Barbara,” Mike replied. “She accidentally adopted so many neighbourhood strays that her house was practically overrun with them. And then what happened to her? She died. Because she was allergic to cats and there was so many that it killed her.”

“I never understood why she fed them and stroked them in the first place if she was so allergic,” Alison returned, to which Mike shrugged. “But it doesn’t matter anyway. We aren’t keeping it.”

“We don’t get to decide that,” Mike said, “the cat does.”

The cat, from its place nestled on Alison’s lap, meowed in agreement.

“Well, if it shows up again, we just won’t let it in. Agreed?”

“Agreed. We can’t afford another mouth to feed. It is cute though,” he admitted.

“It is, isn’t it?”

Despite how adorable the cat was, Alison let it out the front door. She watched as it obediently walked away, tail a little higher than it had been before, looking healthier and perkier. She knew she shouldn’t have been hoping it would come back, but a little part of her didn’t want to say goodbye.

Luckily, she didn’t have to. The very next morning, she opened the door to let the Captain in from his run (“Two minutes and thirty seconds, Captain, but I think you knew that already.”) and hot on his tail came the cat, smiling as obviously as a cat could.

In spite of her better judgement, Alison took the cat into the kitchen again and fed it once more. She knew she shouldn’t have been, but she was already growing very attached to it. Despite its awful smell and awful condition, she felt a soft spot for it. Absently, she wondered if she should take it to a vet, just to get it checked over and see if it had a home. But she was snapped out of her thoughts by one of the loudest things known to mankind – Lady Fanny Button.

“What on Earth is that disgusting creature doing in my house?!” she shrieked, pointing wildly at the cat, which kept eating its food just as peacefully as before.

“Relax, Fanny, I’m just feeding it,” Alison explained.

“Whyever are you doing that? That creature is clearly a stray, probably riddled with fleas, and you’ve brought it into this house like it’s nothing! It’s going to defile this beautiful house and you shall be the one to blame for it, Alison. I want it gone at once!”

“Fanny, it’s not doing anything, okay? Calm down, look, it’s just having something to eat, it needs it.”

“It is a very small step from eating to… to defecating, young lady!” Lady Button retorted. “I shall not have that thing in my house, ruining everything! Take it away.”

“I thought you liked animals,” Alison tried. “You had Dante when you were alive.”

“Dante was a well-behaved, loving, healthy, clean dog. He was not some stray we just picked up off the street one day because we felt like it!”

“Well,” Alison said, “to be fair, we haven’t picked up the cat because we feel like it, it kind of invited itself in.”

“If anything that makes it worse,” Fanny yelled, sounding appalled. “Not only does it smell ghastly and look unseemly, but it is rude as well. It clearly has no manners. I will not ask again, Alison, take the cat out of this house!”

At that moment, the cat finished eating and turned around to try and bat at the hem of Lady Button’s dress. Though it couldn’t touch it (for obvious ghostly reasons), Fanny screamed and took a few paces back. She started yelling more nonsense at Alison, something along the lines of ‘get it out’ and then ran straight through the wall, out of the kitchen.

Sighing, Alison heaved the cat into her arms, took it through the house again and let it out through the front door just like the previous day. She watched it wander away once more, though this time it stopped in the middle of the driveway to wash its leg briefly. She shut the door behind it and got on with the rest of her day.

It wasn’t until the next day, day three, that Alison realised that the cat situation was likely going to become permanent. When she opened the door for the Captain, he did not run in as usual, so she peered out of the door and saw him crouched in the middle of the driveway, attempting to pet the cat but failing miserably because each time his hand passed right through and he gagged.

She watched for a minute, stifling her laughs so that the Captain didn’t hear her and realise she was watching which would likely make him stop. Soon she was joined by someone else.

“Good morning, Alison,” Kitty said, bounding up to her, smiling as brightly as ever. “How are you today? Oh look – the Captain has made a friend!”

Alison chuckled. “He has. It looks like they’re getting on very well.”

Kitty gasped excitedly then said, “It’s a cat. That means it’s a kitty, just like me!” And without further ado, she skipped over to join the Captain and the cat. The Captain looked mildly disgruntled, their moment having been interrupted, but he smiled as soon as the cat started purring, trying to bat at his swagger stick again and jumping at the bows on Kitty’s dress.

A moment later, Mike joined Alison. He looked out at the cat, watching as it jumped and played with what would seem like nothing to him.

“Are there ghosts out there with it?” he asked Alison.

“Yep,” she returned, popping the ‘p’. “Cap and Kitty. They’ve really taken a shine to it.”

“Well, like I said,” Mike replied, “it is really cute, I don’t blame them. Have any of the others met it yet?”

“Only Lady B,” Alison told him. He raised an eyebrow and she continued, “She wasn’t a fan.”

Mike hummed and a silence fell between them. Alison had been thinking more frequently that they really should take it to a vet. Even though it was happy and eating properly when she fed it, getting it checked over wasn’t a bad idea. It didn’t mean they had to adopt it – it just meant that they could have peace of mind knowing it was alright.

She was just about to say this to Mike, but he got in first and said, “I think we should keep it.”

“What?” she replied, shocked. “Why? Two days ago you were worried it was going to kill you.”

“No,” he said, “I just suggested that it’s a possibility we can’t rule out. But you clearly like it, and I think it’s cute, and if the ghosts like it then maybe it’ll – I don’t know – like, placate them a little.”

“They’re not dangerous, they don’t need placating,” Alison said. “Is this just the same as when you said we should get Netflix to ‘appease’ them after they’d finished watching every DVD we own?”

“No,” he said, sounding too affronted to be telling the truth. “Plus, we won’t be caring for it on our own, will we? We’ve got eight extra pairs of eyes to keep a lookout for it. So we can all look after it, it won’t be just us.”

“Only one of those ghosts can touch anything,” Alison told him. “We’ll still have to clean up its poo and stuff like that. And you’re terrible with poo.”

“Yeah, that’s why you’ll be on poo duty.”

“No. If we’re adopting this cat then we’re sharing poo duty. That’s the price you have to pay.”

The both of them turned to watch the Captain and Kitty playing with the cat again. It jumped up to try and grab the feathers in Kitty’s hair and she giggled delightedly.

“Alison,” she called, “it’s so lovely! Come and play with us, please!”

She turned to Mike. “Okay. We’re keeping it then.”

He tore his gaze away from the cat and smiled. “Yeah. Why not? Let’s do it.”

“Great,” Alison said, clapping her hands. “I’ll call the vet, see if they can get us an appointment to make sure it’s all healthy and see if it’s microchipped. I hope it doesn’t already have a home.”

“If it does then we can just get another one,” Mike said, slipping an arm around Alison’s shoulders. “There’s a shelter not too far away.”

“I like this cat, though. I want this one.”

“Well, we’d better get that vet appointment to see if we can have it then, hm?”

And so, not four hours later, Alison and Mike made their way back to Button House from the vets, the kitten nestled comfortably in the back seat. Their appointment had gone very well – the cat was in surprisingly good health for a stray, they had got it up to date on its vaccinations, and they had determined the cat didn’t have a home. So, to the couple’s delight, it was allowed to stay at Button House.

The house was unusually quiet when they arrived back. That normally meant that all the ghosts were assembled upstairs partaking in one of Pat’s clubs or another. There was the faint sound of scattered applause as Alison walked through the front door – one of them had probably finished giving a speech.

She gently put the cat down on the floor as Mike shut the front door behind them.

“Right, missy,” she said. The vet had also confirmed that the cat was a girl and about six months old. “Welcome home!”

The cat meowed and trotted off down the hallway, seemingly in search of the source of the clapping. Alison wandered after it, and the cat led her upstairs to the common room. She found the ghosts all gathered around together, most of them on the sofa, Julian and Robin by the chess board, and Thomas in full view of all of them, bowing even though their half-hearted applause had long since ceased.

Lady Button was the first to notice the new arrival and she didn’t seem best pleased.

“Alison,” she shouted, standing up and pointing at the cat furiously. “I told you to get rid of that vermin, that vile creature, I do not want it in this house!”

“Now listen here,” interrupted the Captain, brandishing his swagger stick. “That cat happens to be in dire need of our assistance. I think it only right that Alison has brought it inside.”

“And it really is a sweetheart, too, Lady Button,” Kitty gushed.

“You’d probably think a grizzly bear was a sweetheart,” Fanny retorted.

Robin shook his head, saying, “Grizzly bear never sweetheart. Grizzly bear kill my uncle. Was very funny actually.”

“Excuse me,” interjected Thomas, “I still have four more poems I want to perform!”

As happened far too often to be endearing anymore, the ghosts all started yelling over each other, some insisting they get rid of the cat, some insisting it stayed, and Thomas insisting he be allowed to finish his recital. Alison watched them fight, the cat sat at her feet, watching bemusedly too, before finally stepping in after Julian and Thomas started squaring up to one another.

“Alright, alright, enough!” she shouted.

Shouting only worked about half the time, sometimes the ghosts’ arguing would be so loud that Alison couldn’t even hear herself over it – luckily, this time around the ghosts fell silent and looked towards her expectantly.

“Okay,” she said, “everyone just listen to me. Mike and I decided that we’re going to adopt this cat–”

“Outrageous,” interrupted Lady Button. Alison ignored her.

“We’ve taken her to the vets. She’s in perfectly good shape and she doesn’t seem to have a home, so we’re taking her in. She might need a little TLC before she starts looking…”

“Less like a toilet brush?” suggested Julian, eyeing the cat.

Alison frowned. “Before she starts looking herself. But we’re keeping her, no objections. Okay? She really is lovely, I promise you all.”

“No, no, no,” shrieked Mary, standing up and joining Lady Button as far away from the cat as they could get. “Al’son, you can’t keeps the pussycat.”

“Why is that, Mary?” Alison asked, trying not to sigh.

“Because you’ll’s be branded a witch!” Mary explained, sounding as if it should have been obvious. “If a woman have a cat then she be a witch! They’ll burns you at the stake! I’d know.”

“Mary, lots of people have cats now and they don’t get burned to death. Alright? And you know I’m not a witch.”

“Oh,” Mary said. “Right. Okay then.”

Without further hesitation she crouched down and smiled at the little cat. It purred and tried to bat at her apron. But it appeared Mary took that as an attempt at attack, so she yelped and ran, hiding behind Kitty.

“You can keeps the pussycat, Al’son, but please keeps it aways from me.”

“If you’re quite finished with the witchcraft nonsense,” said the Captain, stepping forward, “then might I ask if this cat has a name?”

“Oh,” Alison said, “well, Mike and I were going to brainstorm later this evening–”

“That seems hardly fair,” Cap returned. “We all live here, we should all name it.”

“Yes,” said Kitty, bouncing up and down. “I think we should call her Princess Snuggles.”

The Captain laughed. “No, thank you, Katherine, that’s a silly name. I was thinking something more like Major Fuzzyboots.”

“And how, pray tell, is that any less silly than Princess Snuggles?” asked Thomas flatly.

“Well, I don’t see what’s wrong with any classic cat names,” Pat said, peering down at the cat. He stretched his hand out to scratch her head, then looked as if he had to hold back vomit, and withdrew his hand. “Something like Luna or Shadow. Something simple, like.”

“Boring,” Robin remarked. “Should call it Cat. Save trouble.”

“No offense, guys, but I think I’m just going to talk it over with Mike,” Alison decided – the ‘all these names are terrible’ wasn’t spoken aloud but was heavily implied and she was sure they got the picture. “We’ll come up with something. Come on, missy.”

Alison hoisted the cat into her arms and was about to head back downstairs with her, when Julian’s voice piped up from behind and said, “Why not call her Buttons?”

The other ghosts made noises of agreement, which was rare.

“Buttons?” Alison said, looking at the cat. “Well, I suppose she does look like a Buttons. And it’s like Button House! Oh, I love it, nice one, Julian.”

He straightened his tie and suit jacket. “Yes, well, if anyone was going to be the one to solve this – uh – cat naming crisis, well then, I suppose it only makes sense that it were me. It’s not the first crisis I’ve solved, not by any stretch of the imagination. Did I ever tell you all about the time, back in eighty-three, when I…”

Alison didn’t stick around to hear the rest of whatever godawful story Julian was planning on telling. She left the room and headed back downstairs to get Buttons some food and tell Mike they’d decided on a name.

Over the next few weeks, Buttons’ presence in Button House seemed to be almost completely accepted by everyone living there. There had been a few unfortunate incidents and teething problems, but nothing that wasn’t fixable.

The first real problem came two days after Buttons’ adoption. Nobody had been able to find Humphrey’s head, which was predictably detached from his body. Kitty remembered placing it down on the kitchen table, but all they found there was Buttons. Everyone had been searching the house (including Mike, though he couldn’t see Humphrey, and Humphrey’s body, which couldn’t see anything at all) but it hadn’t been until Alison had picked Buttons up that the head had been discovered.

It turned out that Buttons had taken quite a liking to Humphrey and decided to sit on him. The problems arose when Buttons obviously couldn’t sit on Humphrey and instead ended up in him, which obscured the head from view completely. And it didn’t help that Humphrey was allergic, something that apparently hadn’t changed in death. His face was red and his eyes were watering when Alison finally picked up Buttons and freed him.

“Oh, thank goodness for that,” Humphrey breathed. “I’ve been shouting for hours, couldn’t anyone hear me?”

“You must’ve been muffled by Buttons’ fur,” Alison suggested. “Sorry Humphrey, I’ll try to stop that from happening again.”

“Oh, don’t trouble yourself, Alison. It’s alright, really. Well, apart from the allergy, and the sick feeling from having something living touch me. But really, no need to go out of your way.”

Another issue was that Robin just didn’t seem to get on with Buttons. She loved him, clearly – in fact, Buttons seemed to adore everyone in Button House (except Mike, for reasons unknown to anybody) – but one day Alison had walked into the common room to see Robin yelling at the cat.

“Oh, you think you so big, so clever. I kill mammoth. I can easy kill little cat!”

“Woah, hey,” Alison said, approaching the two. Buttons was stood on the chess table, gazing up at Robin with nothing short of adoration in her eyes. “Why are you threatening to kill my cat?”

“Ruin chess game,” Robin huffed, jabbing a finger in Buttons’ direction. She tried to pat it and he grumbled, “Go away.”

“She’s just a cat, I’m sure she didn’t mean to.”

“She did. She jump on table and hit all pieces off. Little guy and horsey on floor, me no pick them up!”

Alison did it for him, picking up the chess pieces and placing them on the squares Robin instructed her to. Buttons quickly lost interest, hopped off the table and left the room.

“And stay out!” Robin called after her.

Thomas didn’t seem to be the cat’s biggest fan either. Alison had a sneaking suspicion that his hatred towards her stemmed from the fact that he had been trying to recite yet another unwarranted love poem to Alison but she’d not been paying attention, instead playing with Buttons. She had caught him seeking his revenge later that day, leaning over Buttons as she slept on the sofa, and whispering what sounded like a demand for her to duel him. Alison had decided to avoid that situation altogether and quickly backed out the room.

The only other ghost who wasn’t totally enamoured with Buttons was Julian, who seemed very indifferent on the whole subject. Though Alison did once catch him practising one of his speeches on the cat, who seemed surprisingly attentive.

But for the most part, Buttons was adored. Many a time, Alison came across the Captain or Pat pretending to stroke her or sitting by her as she slept. Kitty and Mary would play with her (though Mary was still a little wary and periodically asked Buttons if she was a witch in disguise). Even the plague ghosts adored her – she had managed to sneak down to the basement when Mike left the door open once, and the ghosts had tried their hardest to adopt her for themselves. They were happy with the agreement they reached with Alison though, that she would let Buttons down there once a week to visit them all.

The biggest surprise of all came one lazy evening when Alison had been on her way to bed, a sleepy Mike in tow. They had passed through the common room where a fire was dwindling in the fireplace. Buttons was curled up in front of it, sleeping soundly, and watching her with a fond expression on her face was Fanny.

Alison smiled and cleared her throat. Fanny looked round, looking a little startled and embarrassed to be caught gazing at the cat she had been so against.

“Alison,” she said, but didn’t seem to have any words to follow it up with.

“Is she growing on you, then, Fanny?” Alison asked, stifling a yawn.

Fanny turned away, facing Buttons again, and said, “Well. She’s certainly no Dante. But I can admit now that she is rather sweet. I suppose it’s alright that she stays here.”

Alison watched as a small smile grew on Fanny’s face, watching the gentle rise and fall of Buttons’ chest.

“Goodnight, Lady B,” she said.

“Goodnight, Alison.”

From then on, all the residents of Button House treated Buttons as if she were all that mattered, even Robin and Thomas, whose grudges quickly wore off. It seemed that despite the fact that Button House was already full to the brim, adding little Buttons made the house a home.

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nikibogwater · 4 years ago

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Shedding Layers--a Tales of Arcadia fanfiction

“There is a piece of Nari’s head on the sofa!”

Winter has hit New York City, and unfortunately for Douxie, Nari forgot to tell him something important about the season.

Another ToA fic about the Magical Siblings and their Therapy Cat, done partly in collaboration with @poetryinmotion-author (thank you for all the help! ❤). I am SO excited to share this one, you guys. It was a real treat to work on.

Read on Ao3

Or under the cut:

Winter had finally settled on New York City. The freezing air bit like a wild animal, and depending on the day, there was often either rain, sleet, or snow driving against the windows of the apartment. Douxie kept a space heater running twenty-four hours a day now, but even so, Nari spent most of her time huddled beneath a stack of comforters. The yearning for freedom that had tormented her mere weeks ago was long gone. Now, she wanted nothing more than to burrow into her pillow and doze the day away. Douxie had been understandably concerned at first, but she assured him that it was quite normal for her to go into something of a hibernation state come winter. She always made a point to be awake when he came home from work, and between his and Archie’s company, and the wonderfully soft cocoon of blankets Douxie had provided for her, she could honestly say that this winter wasn’t nearly as terrible as she would have expected.

Then came a particularly gloomy Tuesday morning in November when Nari awoke to a telltale tingling feeling at the top of her skull. She groaned and pushed her face deeper into the pillow. She had forgotten about her yearly shed. It usually only took a day or so, but it was always so uncomfortable. It started with the base of her antlers itching. Then as the limbs slowly began to come loose, they would wobble around on top of her head, causing a very unpleasant feeling of imbalance until they finally broke clean off. The top of her head would be a little sore for a few days afterwards as well. Still, there was nothing for it but to just wait it out. She tugged her blanket cocoon tighter around her shoulders and snuggled back down again.

She didn’t have the chance to go back to sleep before she felt Douxie’s hand touch her shoulder, and she emerged from her burrow just enough to peer at him with one sleepy eye.

“Hey, sorry,” he said softly. “I was going to leave a note, but then I felt your aura waking up, so I thought I’d just tell you: I’m working a double shift today. Going to be pretty late, so don’t stay up waiting for me. Make sure you eat today. It’s supposed to be overcast until after dark. Archie will be here, but I want you to call me if anything happens, alright?”

“Mmm...I will be fine,” Nari mumbled, clumsily disentangling one of her hands from the blankets to pat Douxie’s where it still rested on her shoulder. It felt like he told her the same thing every morning, but she supposed that as her guardian, he was entitled to a little fussing. “Have a good day.” She felt Douxie’s aura glow warmly as he squeezed her shoulder before letting go. He tucked the blankets around her snugly before straightening and zipping up his hoodie. Nari heard him cross the floor, pause to scratch Archie behind the ears and throw on his heavy winter coat, and then with a jingle of keys, the click of the door, and the soft hum of magic as he activated the protective seals, he was gone. Nari lay awake for a while afterwards, feeling his soul as it traveled, until she could sense that he had safely arrived at the bookstore where he worked. With a satisfied sigh, she pressed her face as deep into the pillow as she could, wincing as the base of her antlers gave a tingly throb of protest, and went back to sleep.

*****

“In my opinion, the leader of the town should have lost more than just her arm. They should have given her a fitting villain’s death.”

Nari glanced over at Archie, who was perched on the back of the sofa by her shoulder, watching the credits roll for the movie they had just finished.

“But she was kind to her own people, Archie,” Nari argued, swirling her mug of cocoa for a moment before taking a sip. “Perhaps she was consumed by her hatred for the forest, but I do not think she deserved death. It was better that she suffer the loss of her arm and learn from it.” She drained the last of her cocoa and set the empty mug on the floor, grimacing as her antlers jostled on top of her head.

“Are you alright?” Archie asked as she leaned back in her seat, pulling her arm out of the comforter she was wrapped in and massaging the base of her left antler with her fingers. “You’ve been scratching your head all day. You don’t have fleas, do you?” He began to draw away from her warily.

“No,” Nari giggled. “It is just my yearly shed. It always makes me itch.”

“You shed your antlers in the winter?” Archie resumed his place by her head, staring up at the limbs in question with curiosity. “I didn’t know that.”

“It never came up,” she replied, wiggling her left antler experimentally. “This one seems almost ready.” Archie reached out a paw and gingerly prodded the extremity. It wobbled again, and his pupils expanded with interest.

“Yes, I should say so...” he murmured distractedly, batting it a little more forcefully. Nari giggled again as he sat up on his hind legs and swiped with both paws.

There was a wooden creak, and then a snap, like the sound of a branch being broken. Archie lept back as the antler dislodged from Nari’s head and tumbled down into her lap. There was an awkward beat or two of dead silence. Nari was the first to break it.

“That is one down,” she sighed in relief, picking up the dead limb and turning it over in her hands. “I am not sure what to do with this, though. Do you want it?” she asked, looking up at Archie. He slid down from the back of the couch and sniffed the offering, considering it for a moment.

“...No, thank you,” he said at last. “It is significantly less interesting when it’s not attached to your head.”

“Maybe Douxie will know what to do with it.” Nari set the antler down beside her and stretched her arms above her head with a wide yawn. Outside, the wind shrieked, and a fresh flurry of snow flashed in the glare of the city lights. “I wish he was home,” she murmured. “It is an awful night to be out.”

“Yes, I certainly don’t envy him just now,” Archie replied, jumping to the floor and stretching his own legs. “But don’t worry about him. He’ll be alright. Wizards are very resilient, you know.”

“His soul is already tired,” she whispered, closing her eyes as she reached out with her magic, feeling the weary glow of his aura. “He always works too hard...”

“Yes...” Archie sighed, his ears folding back slightly. “He does.” The Familiar shook himself and looked back up at Nari with a reassuring smile. “But that’s a problem for the daylight hours, hm? You look ready to keel over.” He shifted into his dragon form, picked up her empty cocoa mug between his paws, and flew it over to the kitchen sink. He came back to the sofa and nudged Nari’s head where it was beginning to droop against the armrest. “Come on. Don’t want you falling asleep here and getting a sore neck.” Nari hummed sleepily and eased off of the sofa with another yawn. Archie turned off the television and the overhead lights, then slipped back into his cat form and crossed the room to Nari’s bed, where she was creeping beneath the covers. Once she had properly secured herself in her blanket cocoon, the cat curled up against the crook of her legs, and with the sound of his gentle purring in her ears, she quickly drifted off to sleep.

****

A few hours later, Nari was violently torn from slumber by a sudden, sickening pulse of ice-cold terror that pierced her aura like one of Skreal’s icy daggers. It was accompanied by the sound of Douxie frantically crying her name, his voice twisted with fear. The wood nymph yelped and blindly tumbled out of bed, accidentally throwing Archie off of her in the process, who yowled in surprise as he landed on the floor next to her. Nari struggled with the blankets wrapped around her, disoriented and somewhat panicked, and felt her powers seizing up, preparing for a fight. Surely only the return of the Arcane Order could make Douxie sound so petrified. Before she had the chance to disentangle herself, or even ask what was happening, he sprinted across the room, dropped to his knees beside her, and ripped the blankets off of her. Ignoring her second yelp in response to the sudden exposure to the cold, he grabbed her face between his trembling hands and frantically looked her up and down, hazel eyes blown wider than she had ever seen before.

“What happened?!” he demanded in a horrified whisper. “Were you attacked? Where else are you hurt?” He didn’t give her a chance to answer before turning his attention to Archie, who was emerging from underneath the bed where he had taken shelter. “Archie, are you alright? Was it the Order?”

“For goodness’ sake, Douxie, calm down!” Archie ordered a tad irately, readjusting his skewed glasses. “What has you all upset?”

“What has me...?” Douxie stared at his Familiar incredulously. “There is a piece of Nari’s head on the sofa!” He thrust his hand out and pointed at the piece of furniture in question--Nari’s left antler was laying innocently right where she had left it earlier.

“...Oh,” Nari squeaked, both relieved and embarrassed. Douxie returned his attention to her, now clutching her tightly by the shoulders. “No, we were not attacked. It just fell off earlier today.” She had been hoping he would find this information reassuring, but if anything, he looked even more aghast.

“It just....fell off?!” he echoed hysterically. “What do we...D-do we call a doctor? Or a vet? Who are you supposed to call for this kind of thing?!”

“Nobody! I am perfectly fine, Douxie!” She grabbed one of his hands in both of hers and squeezed, trying to send a wave of calm into his frantically churning aura. “This happens every year.” Douxie’s eyes moved from her face, up to her one remaining antler, and then over to Archie, as though looking for a second opinion.

“Most antlered creatures have what’s called a shed around this time of the year,” Archie said in a calming, matter-of-fact voice. “It’s perfectly natural, and it doesn’t harm them. It’s really no surprise that Nari experiences the same thing.”

“And it will grow back!” Nari added hopefully, squeezing his hand again. “So please do not worry.” There was a somewhat uncomfortable pause, during which the only sound was Douxie’s labored breathing, which gradually became slower and softer. Finally, he seemed to deflate, the tension in his aura dispersing as he heaved an enormous sigh. A moment later, he gave a mirthless chuckle and gently pulled Nari into an embrace.

“...Fuzzbuckets,” he muttered. “I think I just aged three centuries.”

“I’m sorry,” Nari whispered into his shoulder. “I should have warned you. I just forgot all about it.”

“Does it hurt?” he asked, easing her back enough to see the top of her head.

“...A little,” she admitted, hating the way Douxie’s aura paled as she said it. “But it will be fine in just a day or two.” He gave her a sympathetic look and gently ran his hand over the top of her head, fingers ghosting delicately across the small bump where her antler once grew.

“It will grow back?” he questioned anxiously. “For sure?”

“Yes,” Nari assured him. “Sometime in the spring.” Douxie’s aura settled a little more at the reassurance, but he continued to look despondent as he stared at her. “...What’s wrong?” she asked nervously.

“...It’s just...You’re....lopsided,” he stammered, looking embarrassed.

“Oh.” She reached up and felt her one remaining antler, wiggling it experimentally. “Wait, perhaps I can...” She tugged on it gently and felt it begin to break away from her skull. Douxie gaped at her in abject horror as she pried the limb off of her head with a sound like that of wood peeling. With a final crack, the antler was in her hands, and a bare-headed Nari smiled up at him hopefully. “Is this better?”

It took the shocked wizard a long time to find his words, as his eyes flicked between the top of her head and the dead limb she cradled in her hands.

“...I think I’m going to be sick,” he mumbled, one of his hands coming up to cover his mouth.

“Don’t be rude, Douxie,” Archie scolded as Nari visibly shrank with disappointment. “This is a perfectly ordinary process for her.”

“Sorry, I’m sorry,” Douxie muttered, hastily pulling the small demigoddess back into his arms. “S’just been a day. Someone was signing books at the store today, and the crowds were absolutely ludicrous, I haven’t been able to sit down since lunch this afternoon, and then I come home to find out Nari is losing bits of her head...” He trailed off with a heaving sigh and rest his cheek against her hair. “...I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

Nari tossed the antler aside and folded her arms around him. “My poor Douxie,” she whispered, pressing him against her tightly. He sighed again--this time in relief--as her aura wrapped around his, sharing her warmth and energy, and easing some of the tiredness that was weighing down his limbs.

“...Thanks,” he breathed as she pulled back. She looked a bit drained, but pleased, as she gave him a nod and smile. He ruffled her hair gently, still mindful of the sore patches where her antlers had broken off. “...There isn’t....anything else like this that I should know about, is there?” he asked hesitantly.

Nari was about to tell him no, when she caught sight of Archie’s golden eyes staring up at her with a mischievous gleam. He gave her a conspiratorial grin and a slight nod. “Well,” she began slowly, looking back at Douxie. “...I do secrete a deadly toxin from beneath my fingernails if I am agitated.”

All of the blood immediately drained from Douxie’s face.

“...What?” The wood nymph burst into a fit of squeaky giggles, while next to her, Archie collapsed onto his stomach and howled with laughter. “...This is abuse,” Douxie groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Do you realize how many beats my heart just skipped? You’re bloody psychopaths, the both of you.”

“It’s your own fault for making it so easy,” Archie retorted, while next to him, Nari was trying to gasp out an apology between her giggles. Douxie huffed and gave his Familiar a playful shove.

“Would a cup of tea make up for it?” Nari asked, once she was able to regain control of herself.

“It would be a good start, at least,” Douxie replied with a fond grin.

Ten minutes later found the three of them on the sofa, mugs in hand, Nari wrapped up in her favorite blanket once more and curled against Douxie’s side, Archie sitting on the wizard’s lap and purring like a small engine.

“...I don’t suppose you have any idea what we should do with those?” Douxie asked, nodding towards the pair of antlers now resting neatly on the island countertop.

“I was hoping you would,” Nari confessed, taking a sip of her tea. “I have always just left them wherever they happened to drop. I liked to imagine they would bring good luck to whoever found them.” She smiled ruefully into her mug. “I suppose that is rather childish of me.”

“I like that idea,” Douxie said firmly. “Tell you what: I don’t have to go in to work until four tomorrow. We’ll eat out for lunch and then find a nice back alley to leave them in, where some poor sod can find them and pick up a bit of good fortune. Sound good?” He glanced at her sideways, his expression soft and his aura glowing with a gentle affection that, even after four months, Nari still sometimes struggled to process. She gave him a shy smile and nodded, pressing her face into the side of his shoulder as her fingers tightened around her tea mug. The wind howled outside, and Archie continued to purr.

Yes, winter here was downright pleasant, Nari decided, as long as you had a family to share it with.

#tales of arcadia #toa #wizards: tales of arcadia #wizards: toa #douxie #nari #toa archie #the magic siblings #and their therapy cat #found family #fanfiction

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bluecoloreddreams · 5 years ago

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Hey, I love your TsukiYama fics, they are so good!!!... and some of them are so sad. But I was wondering, if Yama and Tsukki takes Himawari to her biological parents greaves and explains the situation that got them to adopt her when she is old enough to understand. I like to think that Yama tell his late cousin how their daughter is doing

Oh, thank you!!! So, at first, I was gonna answer this with just like, an author comment, but I can do you better than that:

It’s April again. Time and time again, the spring opens up, cool air mixing into something warm as the cherry blossoms open, replacing the snow with pink drifts of petals.

It’s time for change. They shift from wool coats to felted ones; Tadashi layers his shirts, long-sleeve, short-sleeve, jacket. They open the windows and doors, shooing out the last dregs of winter. The dog goes to the groomer. The cat gets cornered in the bathroom trying to run away from the flea collar. Uniforms get bought in a different size, one grade’s ribbon exchanged for another.

There’s a house, now, in the suburbs of Sendai. A house that’s big enough for them all to spread and grow. The hot water works; the paint is new; there’s a laundry room and the door never sticks in its hinges. There’s a garden, a ramshackle thing with wildflowers and tomatoes and once, corn, straight from the bird feeder (before the cat got the bird, which was a traumatic experience all around).

Tadashi tugs a brush through his hair, mouth full of bobby pins, trying to decide the most reputable way to style his hair. At the clinic, no one really cares what their vet’s hair looks like, as long as he does his job correctly. At home, no one cares either, because if it’s not loose or in a bun, it’s done up in some odd experimental style or another, complete with Hello Kitty scrunchies. His family, on the other hand…

They’ve relaxed in the last few years, considerably. Extended family, not so much, but this is the only time of year he really sees them anymore.

He sighs and pins his bangs back into his ponytail, figuring it will just have to do. He straightens his tie, a silk thing borrowed from Kei with dinosaurs printed up and down the length of it, and if it’s a little bit ridiculous to wear to a seven-year memorial service, then that’s just how it’ll be.

He hears the car pull up, and he slips from the bathroom to pad down the stairs just in time to be nearly barreled over by the dog on one side and a flying mass of pigtails and rumpled school uniform on the other.

He hoists Himawari up, groaning as he spins her around. Eight is probably too old to be carrying her around like he did when she was two, but hours and hours of picking up heavier dogs than her allows him a little more flexibility about it.

“Woah there, you look like you rolled down a hill,” Tadashi says, setting her down.

Kei clicks his tongue at the doorway, leaning down to take his shoes off, holding Himawari’s loafers in his hand. “Tell your papa,” he says, sounding amused.

“Uh.”

Tadashi closes his eyes and counts to five. “Himawari-chan, what did you do now?”

“Sora-chan said I couldn’t have three dads and a mom so I pushed her down the playground slide but she grabbed me,” Himawari says, eyes decidedly not meeting Tadashi’s, suddenly very interested in petting Tikachu the Dog.

Tadashi groans, kneeling down so he’s eye-to-eye with his daughter. “We don’t push,” he says. “You know that.”

Himawari looks away from Tadashi, fidgeting with the ends of her pigtails. “She was being mean, and she said bad things about you and dad, so I pushed her.”

“Show your dad,” Kei says, a smirk barely concealed. His arms are crossed as he leans in the doorway, eyes glinting behind his glasses.

Himawari tips her head back and opens her mouth and Tadashi flinches. “Okay, well! That’s, uh, great! Please close your mouth,” he says, wrinkling his nose at the sight of a missing molar. “Kei, please tell me you have it.”

“Mm. We also have to go buy new stockings,” Kei adds like he’s being helpful.

“Okay! Okay, we’ll address this in a moment!” Tadashi says, standing up with a clap. “Himawari-chan, how about you go get changed while daddy and I talk?”

“Am I in trouble?”

Tadashi shoots Kei a look, who shrugs and spreads his hands out. “You let Nishinoya and Tanaka babysit her growing up, that’s not on me,” he says.

“We’ll talk about fighting later,” Tadashi says. “You can’t fistfight everyone who thinks our family is a little odd, Himawari-chan.”

“Yeah but,” Himawari starts, scowling and ducking her chin into the collar of her uniform. “You are my real dads.”

Tadashi grins then, leaning back up against Kei as he steps up out of the entry. “You’re right,” he says, throat tight as Himawari flashes a toothy grin and flits up the stairs to her bedroom.

“You suck at discipline,” Kei drawls. “And tying ties. Turn around.”

Tadashi turns dutifully, smoothing his fingers over Kei’s shoulders, tapping the sunflower-embossed pin on his lapel. “Keeping that on?”

“I’m always up for intimidating idiots,” Kei drawls, undoing Tadashi’s tie, eyes focused at the other man’s throat. “I go to pick her up and find her in the nurses’ office with a piece of ice and skinned knees and a referral. They were going on about no tolerance until they saw my pin. It was déjà vu.”

“It was because of that project,” Tadashi sighs. “When school started the new term, when you were away at that conference in Tokyo, she did a family history project.”

“I see,” Kei says, looping Tadashi’s tie expertly. “Where’s your blazer?”

“By the door,” Tadashi answers. “I guess the other little girl is new to the school or to the class. Was she hurt?”

“No, her mother ran into me in the parking lot, actually. She was nice,” Kei says offhandedly. He reaches up and tugs a piece of Tadashi’s bangs free, tucking it gently behind his ear. “There you go.”

“Did you make Himawari apologize?”

“What do you take me for?” Kei scoffs.

“A sucker,” Tadashi snickers, ducking when Kei reaches out to ruffle his hair. He reaches out and grabs his blazer from the peg by the door, shrugging it on as Himawari comes thudding down the hallway in her black dress and tights, pigtails a bit lopsided as she grabs Tadashi’s outstretched hand.

Kei takes her other hand, and they both hold her up as she shoves her feet into her obnoxiously sparkly pink boots.

“Daddy got sunflowers,” she tells Tadashi. “He said I could have one.”

“I did not,” Kei snorts. “She stole one out of the bouquet.”

“They’re for my mommy and daddy,” Himawari protests. “One of them needs to be from me.”

“She’s right,” Tadashi points out, letting Himawari tug free of his hand and skip towards the car.

Kei rolls his eyes as Tadashi steps into his shoes. “And you wonder why she’s spoiled,” he complains.

“Oh, no, I know exactly why,” Tadashi laughs.

“Come on!” Himawari cries, tugging at the door handle. “Come oooon! We’re gonna go see my other parents!”

Maybe it was wrong to be so open about Kana and her husband with Himawari from such a young age, or how hard they had to fight to adopt her. But they never wanted to hide it from her, never wanted her to feel like she’d been unwanted or left behind, so they told her in ways she could understand, took her to the graves and set up a shrine in the house and taught her how to leave food and flowers, how to say the prayers. They gave her Kana’s journals, with her tiny footprint and lock of hair; they gave her her father’s rock collection and taught her the names of the tiny gemstones in it. They tried to teach her in the hopes that she could grow and be happy and learn.

April always brought changes, and not all of them good. Every year, Tadashi grapples with how he can be so thankful for something so awful, and he prays. He prays to apologize, to thank, to hope that he’s raising Himawari in the same loving way that his cousin would have. That she always meets their memory with a thankfulness and desire to love them without knowing them. That he and Kei can be the parents that she needs, that they can grow together, until the next time the petals fall.

#asks #mitkun writes stuff #tsukkiyama #haikyuu!!#oh my god I haven't written these two in Y E A R S #but I was OVERCOME #Anonymous

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panticwritten · 5 years ago

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About to get hella emotional on main

November 19th will be this blog’s second birthday. I’ve been thinking about this post since September, and how I didn’t post anything for it last year.

I’ve been doing this writeblr thing for almost two years. It’s been so awesome to be a part of this community (the somber wording of this makes it sound like I’m leaving but I’m not), even if I know I don’t actually talk with other people very often. I go back and forth about feeling guilty about that, but the point stands that it’s so cool to see so many people so excited about their work. It’s amazing, and I really don’t have the words to describe how much I love to see it even if I don’t know a lot about peoples’ projects.

I’m going to have a normal anniversary post on the day, but that’s not what this is. This is gonna be sad and this is pretty much the equivalent of rebreaking a bone to make sure it sets right. Be forewarned about mentions of suicide, depression, and a story involving animal death that got a lot more detailed than I thought it was going to when I started this post.

I want to talk about why I made this blog.

Full disclosure, November is the absolute worst time of the year for me. It’s the time when seasonal depression starts to hit. It’s the part of term that always kicks my feet out from under me. There are a lot of memories stitched into this month that I haven’t been able to untangle. Really, it’s only two memories and a lot of uncomfortable Thanksgivings, but still.

It was just a month to me until 2014 when I ended up hospitalized after I overdosed on my antidepressants. I’m not gonna go into detail about any of that or the fallout from it, other than my life changed a lot for the better after. New school, new people, shiny new paint over everything.

But that whole thing was massively related to my daydreams. I cared more about them than I did reality, I was in physical pain when I was reminded that the world I’d spun up in my head and the people I loved so much who lived there would always be out of physical reach for me. I hadn’t had the Collective for very long outside of the histories I’d constructed for them. I’d known them forever in my head but I’d only had them for around a year. But they weren’t real and no matter how much I loved them or they loved me the family I spent most of my time with couldn’t really be there for me.

The point is, my daydreaming was wildly unhealthy then. I was obsessive and had at some point convinced myself in no uncertain terms that no one could know about the world in my head as anything other than what it looked like. It was just a story, right? Stories can’t hurt you, can’t give you trauma, can’t bake lasting and damaging fears in you even if they’re about you, right?

They can’t make you afraid of being underground, of the smallest echo in the dark of a cave. They can’t make you flinch when someone touches you out of some bullshit fear response you never physically learned. They can’t make distant sounds of movement in a house ratchet your fight or flight up. They can’t lace a fear of being watched so deep into your core that your constant irrational fear is a hidden camera in a space that’s supposed to be yours, that everything’s a test and all you have to do is mess up once and—

Yeah.

So I started writing them down. It gave me a way to bleed shit out, I guess. Instead of just wrangling it down into a box in my head, I sifted through what I had. I tried to start at the beginning, but everything was too fragmented then.

Eventually, I started the daydream that would turn into Breaking Furnace and I found a good way to categorize things. I started writing it, I got really far before I made this blog. I had been putting off finishing the dream itself because there was some shit toward the end that I knew was gonna suck, but the November 2017 happened.

I’d just moved to Portland, I was up here with my new roommate, keeping up decently in school, I had a new friend in my roommate and frankly the best ESA to ever exist and things were good. Things were okay, I was a little wary about November like I had been the two years before that, but generally fine.

Just one thing.

Before I moved up here, I had my cat, Dipper, checked out my the vet. I just wanted to make sure he was good, pick up a nice flea collar, reassure myself he was fine. Most things were fine, but we found out he had a heart murmur. I was told it increased his chances of throwing a clot that would kill him, but that he might just live his life. I’d know if it happened if his back legs stopped working. I felt the way he breathed so heavy a lot differently after that, but I made jokes because I had to. I got him a little ‘I have a heart condition’ tag for his collar.

So, November 8th. It was some time in the morning, 10 probably. I was watching Grey’s Anatomy. Dipper knocked an empty water bottle off the stand his food was on and I remember so clearly laughing when I turned to look. Asking what he was getting up to in the way you only can with the dumb animals we love so much.

And I remember my entire body going numb when he fell off the stand himself because he couldn’t walk properly anymore. I panicked and called my mom but she obviously couldn’t help and I was left to deal with it by myself so I couldn’t afford to be panicked. I needed to not feel it, so I just.

That numb was what stayed with me, and I don’t know if it’s actually gone away.

I was numb while I held him and l looked up a vet. Called one, explained in a voice that I didn’t recognize, got transferred to another, explained again. I was numb when I messaged the group chat my new friends had set up asking for a ride or for someone to go with me. I didn’t have money to order a Lyft, I was still waiting for the money I was transferring from my savings to my checkings so I could buy a new bag of cat food.

I was numb when the Lyft driver my friend called for us asked what was wrong with my cat and all I could say was that he was dying. When we got there and I explained at the front desk and had to watch them take him back. When they asked about sedatives and anesthesia and I didn’t care how much those cost because I couldn’t let him hurt. They were so gentle when they asked if I would want extreme measures taken to save him, but I’d known I was going to lose him before I’d called them so I was numb when I signed the DNR form too.

When I met with the vet, all I needed her to tell me was what was happening, to confirm the odds. She asked me what I wanted to do, but what I wanted had nothing to do with it and everyone in the room knew that. Even though I knew already, I asked what would be kinder and signed another form.

I got to hold him, got to make sure he knew that I was there. That I didn’t just leave him. He didn’t look any different afterward and I didn’t have room to feel anything but that vast emptiness.

They waved the fees for the visit, but I couldn’t afford to get a personal cremation. I could get fur clippings and pawprints for free but I felt like I was losing him twice in one day when I signed that order form. They asked if I wanted to see his body again once I’d left, but I couldn’t. I just wanted to get out. I regret it, I hate myself for it sometimes.

I almost didn’t go to the support group I found out about the next day. I met someone there who was so fucking pissed on my behalf. I genuinely can’t remember if it was $80 or $180 to get the personal cremation, to be able to get something of him back, but this fucking saint of a woman walked with me down to the reception area and asked if there was still time and paid it for me. I will never be able to repay her for that.

But the thing is, I never got to grieve.

I went home without him, I got mad. I walked into my dorn and automatically turned to look at my bed because he’d normally jump down from the shelf when I walked in. I cried, more than I ever had before.

I emailed my professors, didn’t go to class that day or the next. I looked at myself and I stared at that stand his food was still on and I just. Didn’t have time to fall apart. I didn’t have time to lose it. I went to a stupid fucking volunteer training thing at a hospital I ended up not even getting a position at instead of letting myself breathe for five seconds.

And no one really let me talk about it, I only had access to the limited counseling services my school provides, so I never actually got the chance to work through anything.

So, after that terrible story that made me cry for the first time in months to write, back to Breaking Furnace.

Instead of letting myself think about it at all, I threw myself into my daydreams and finished the Furnace daydream in about three days. I obsessed. I wrapped myself in my writing because if I’m thinking about my stories I don’t have to think about real shit that actually hurts.

I didn’t want to just write for me anymore. I needed a distraction. I needed something to make me not be who I was, I needed a community that didn’t know anything about the terrible hurt that I was trying to paint over.

So I made a writeblr.

I did that, and I started posting my writing. I felt welcomed and I felt cared about. I felt the community I never actually expected to be able to be a part of. I expected to lose interest after a few weeks but I didn’t and I felt comfortable in something that had nothing to do with what was killing me.

I don’t think it would be an exaggeration to say that I don’t know if I would have survived if it weren’t for writeblr. I don’t have any planned landing point for this, just that. I’m just, so thankful and so glad that I made the decision to break into this.

#animal death #suicide mention #i might add more tags later or i wont #im glad i wrote this but im really emotionally exhausted now and i need to get up for work in the morning

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if-there-was-any-more-left-of-me · 5 years ago

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I need to get this all down.

I shake all day long. My hands mostly, but my whole body too.

I'm always either starving or nauseous and wanna throw up. Nothing I eat makes it better. I crave garbage food and shovel down sugary snacks as fast as I can.

I'm always bloated, painfully so, and gassy. My stomach is swollen and hard, and it hurts to sit, stand, or lay down. I'm constipated most of the week, then visited with violent, painful, explosive diarrhea.

I'm thirsty and I drink and drink and drink but I never feel better.

I can't go to sleep til 5 or 6 am. I wake up at 7 or 8,go back to sleep, wake up at 11 or so and eat breakfast then go back to sleep til 2 or 3 or 4 or 5 pm. When I wake up, I am always The Most Tired I have ever been. I never wake up feeling happy or rested or content. I often have these really intense dreams that are more exhausting than being awake and I wake up panting, shaking, hot and sweaty (even with AC, a fan, and just a sheet), and feeling as though I had been clenching my whole body tight for hours.

Every sound is the most annoying sound ever. The radio, people talking, electronics, pet lickiing foot, water filter. My ears feel big and hollow and resonate these sounds like a big empty tin barn. Some sounds feel more like a thin, long drill bit being driven deep down in my ear.

I can't smile or laugh. I can't lift my head up.

I am so depressed and so angry. I hate the government, I hate the public for letting it all happen, I hate my mother for squandering our money and getting my health insurance canceled and for acting like she's not responsible for me being so sick.

I hate being trapped in this house where I can't even flush the toilet. I hate that my only outing is driving to go feed all the cats.

I hate that I can't use my phone consistently to escape because of the shitty service. I hate that my friends have all forsaken me and don't even wonder about me let alone want to see me.

My memory is gone. I can't remember anything, what time it is, what day it is, who I was just talking to, what I ate for breakfast. I don't know anything. My brain doesn't work. I used to be funny and clever and genuinely smart. But right now I can't figure out how to turn the shower on. People ask me questions and I can't answer. I can't listen to conversation because I dissociate so hard.

My head hurts all the time. Much worse having to drive facing the sunset. I can't see from it. Just painful white glare.

My diabetic neuropathy is getting much worse than the Gabapentin can handle. My feet are numb and everything I touch hurts my hands. Having to do things with my fingers is excruciating.

My back hurts all the time, whether I am trying to work or not. In addition to my lower back injury, it now hurts up high. Any way I move my neck or arms hurts.

I am dizzy all the time. Standing up feels woozy and thick. My knees, ankles, hips buckle when I walk. Obviously, walking hurts my numb feet. I have no sense of balance anymore. I used to be strong and steady.

Without my insurance, I can't follow through with the important testing my GI doctor was doing, which was originally to find out what was causing all my digestive problems, but then also included making sure something she found wasn't cancerous. But that's not important.

I can't afford my allergy pills, which are not important.

I can't see my podiatrist to fix my horribly painful ingrown toenails. Not important.

Can't see the pain management doctor who prescribes my pain medication and does minor pain alleviating procedures. Not important.

Can't see my psychiatrist who was in the process of trying out new depression medication and getting me to a level of functioning. I'm stuck in limbo with a medication that doesn't work for me.

Definitely can't see a therapist cuz even if I could afford it, I would be told every day what a waste it is and that I should manage my problems like SHE does, by yelling at my family and belittling my elderly husband (no that was a actual conversation we had)

Can't afford to get my regular blood work done by my regular doctor that she always insists we do monthly because we're very sick, unmanaged diabetics. I'm not even getting to take the diabetes medication I'm supposed to I'm just taking whatever free samples she has in office

God I miss going to the doctor. But that's not important. You know what's important? A 2005 red ford mustang pony edition that's held under titlemax. I have been told many times that that car will not be relenquished no matter what else has to go. I think that includes m8. Because I am very sick but I keep being told that I am imagining that I can't go to the doctor. I'm imagining that I can't afford my prescription.

Am I imagining the sick cat with a massive infection that's eaten a 2" by 4" patch of skin off his back that he licks raw every day? Am I imagining not being able to afford to take him to the vet? Am I imagining the massive tumors on HER dog? The dozens of them? I guess it's fine that she dies as long as we get to keep the mustang.

I am definitely imagining that the house is infested with millions of fleas and we can't afford the good medication (ie the $15/animal stuff that actually kills fleas) for 3 dogs and 16 cats.

Definitely imagining not being able to get get 14 wild kittens spayed and homed.

But I know I am not imagining the dozens of stray cats we spend more money on every day that we feed. Those are real.

More real I guess than my sister's need for therapy or my dad's need for dental surgery after all of his teeth have rotted out and the infection is getting ready to spread.

But that's not important. My teeth aren't important and it is definitely my fault for not going to the dentist that I have holes and cavities and pain and shit and definitely not because SHE complained constantly about me wasting money by going to the dentist every year (back when we had money) and then obviously not going anymore once the money dried up.

I remember her screaming at me in 2017,threatening to tell the doctors and police that I refused to take my medicine so they'd lock me up because she didn't like how I responded to some of the dozen different meds I tried that year. I remember because now she has convinced herself that I never take my medicine and that all my problems would go away if I would just take my medicine.

I'm so sick. I'm so scared. I'm so angry. I don't know what to do. I just want to scream and tear myself open.

It's getting worse. And every time I say that I'm upset about concentration camps or not being able to get the medicine I need, I get told to take more medicine. I can't take this level of invalidation. The gaslighting. I do not know what is real anymore.

This seems like an afterthought but I also can't buy any healthy snacks to maybe cut back on the horrifying amount of sugar I consume every day because all the food money goes to pet food and sugary treats. And I get yelled at for asking for less sugar in the house. Told to just eat something else but there is nothing else. I don't know what to do. Lacy makes these watery soups out of whatevers in the fridge to feed us. But I want real food.

I can't stop shaking. I know why I am so goddamn sick. Because I am malnourished, angry, frightened, stressed out to the maximum, and have no recourse. Every complaint is met with gaslighting or being told to take more antidepressants, as though they're some kind of magic happy pills.

I want to check myself into the hospital but I can't afford it. I would have already killed myself but I am not villainous enough to abandon my 85 yr old deaf dad whose had 4 strokes and does all the outside work and whom mom screams and ridicules mercilessly. And my sister who's anxiety is on a hair trigger and whom mom loves to trigger and laugh at her panic.

I need a miracle. I need help. I need someone to fucking shoot me in the face. God kill me please I can't take this anymore please

#Suicide cw #Abuse cw #Very sensitive content #Self harm cw #I don't know how to tag this

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galfridus1 · 6 years ago

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Happy Birthday Arthur!

It’s 17 August here and it’s Arthur’s birthday!! Many happy returns!

Here’s a fic, inspired by prompt from @thestarrynightgazer and with thanks to @maybeishouldwait for comments. This is part one of three/four depending on whether you count reblogs.

***

“It’s his birthday? Today?”

Zeldris looked at Gelda with absolute incredulity, his heart pounding uncomfortably in his chest. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” he griped as he shot out of bed, quickly rummaging in the wardrobe for something to wear. “Now I’ve got less than eight hours to find him a present.”

Gelda looked up at him, her face calm and serene as she propped herself up with a number of pillows. “I would have thought you’d remember,” she chastised, a slight smile curving the left side of her mouth. “How long have we been living together now? Time enough for you to know when Arthur’s birthday is. And besides it’s on the calendar…”

“Yes, yes alright!” Zeldris grumbled as he pulled on some clothes. “What’s happening anyway?”

Gelda looked at him, her violet eyes gleaming and Zeldris felt the breath catch in his throat. It was the one feature they shared, their eyes so like one another’s, their beauty causing him pause even after all these years. “You have no need to worry,” she chuckled, “I’ve sorted everything out. The party will be here. Arthur knows nothing about it but everyone else does, and I booked catering. The cake is a masterpiece.”

“How are you always so organised?” Zeldris muttered as he checked his reflection in the full-length mirror, running a hand through his hair to make sure the spikes were arranged in their proper place.

“It’s easy really,” Gelda replied, “You just have to pay attention and get stuff done. Which is what you should do now. I have suggestions for gifts if you’d like?”

Zeldris paused, his lips pressed together as he battled temptation. “No. I do this every year. I’m going to get him something myself this time.”

Gelda laughed, the tinkling sound reverberating through the air. “Well, good luck. Text me if you draw a blank.”

***

Four hours later Zeldris sincerely regretted telling his girlfriend that he did not need her help. He had scoured what felt like the whole of Oxford Street, trying and failing to find something Arthur might feasibly want as a gift. But it was all to no avail. The problem was Arthur had everything any twenty-five year old could possibly want, and if he got him alcohol again Gelda would no doubt raise her eyebrows, the expression saying ‘I told you so’ more clearly than any words could convey.

Still, a bottle of some random liquor was better than nothing. Turning abruptly, adroitly dodging the crowds swarming past in the opposite direction, Zeldris made his way back to the department store he had listlessly explored earlier that morning. The day was hot, the relentless August sun beating down on the shoppers who dragged their feet limply down the tarmaced street but Zeldris trudged on, wrinkling his nose in disgust as the odd smell of grease from the stalls dotting the sides of the road caused him to gag slightly. He just wanted the whole sorry experience to be over. Thank goodness Gelda’s birthday was not until April next year.

He was nearing the pretentious facade of Selfridges when a conversation caught his attention, the words somehow penetrating his consciousness above the hubbub of chatter. His eyes strayed to a small girl walking alongside her mother, clutching at a lead for dear life as an enthusiastic puppy pulled her forcefully along. The animal looked delighted, oblivious to the weather, and Zeldris was surprised to feel a twinge of longing piercing his chest. It looked so much fun, and of course Arthur had always wanted a dog.

Zeldris stood stock still, causing several passersby to bump into him forcefully. And why not? True, a dog was not ideal - they shed hair like nobody’s business and made their surroundings smell like mouldy old socks when wet - but the three of them were older now, and well off. They could easily afford to look after a pet, and it could always live outside in the garden. And as a gift it was at least original; Gelda could hardly complain that he had wimped out this time.

***

About half an hour later, Zeldris was standing in the reception of Battersea Dogs and Cats home, the only place he could think of in central London where one might find a canine at short notice. The walls were covered in pictures and leaflets showcasing the charity’s many success stories, sorry-looking mongrels, skeletal and with mangy fur, transformed into sleek, happy and well-beloved pets. He was just congratulating himself on his brilliant idea when the voice of the receptionist pulled him back to reality.

“You need to book an appointment for an interview about adopting a dog,” she gently explained as she tapped on her computer keyboard. “We have slots next week, but nothing available until then, I’m afraid.”

Zeldris felt his heart sink slightly. “Is there nothing sooner?” he asked cautiously. “I was really hoping to get one today.”

“Well that’s out for a start,” the woman said sharply, her eyes drilling into him as she turned away from her screen. “We are very careful here. We don’t let just anyone adopt a dog. There’s an initial interview, a home visit to check suitability, and then an observation when a suitable pet has been found. The whole process takes about a month.”

“A month?” Zeldris asked incredulously. “But… I mean…”

“If you’re after a specific dog, don’t worry, there’s always plenty, and sometimes the cute ones aren’t all they’re cracked up to be,” the lady continued, her expression softening slightly. “We have dozens of Staffies and they’re great companions. People look down on them, but they’re wonderful. I have three myself.”

“It’s not that,” Zeldris said quickly, feeling an unwelcome heat flooding his cheeks. “It’s… well this is embarrassing. It’s my boyfriend’s birthday today and he’s always wanted a dog. I really wanted to surprise him.”

“Awww!” The noise that issued from the woman’s mouth was somewhere between a sigh and a swoon. “That’s so, so… romantic,” she gushed, and Zeldris felt the blush he was trying to manage spiral out of control. “But it doesn’t change things,” she added more gently, a sad smile on her face. “There’s no way you can adopt a dog as a surprise. Our team will need to talk to your boyfriend too.”

Zeldris was on the point of making a hasty exit when he caught a calculating look in the receptionist’s eyes. “But…” she began, her lips pursed in thought.

“Go on,” he encouraged, with some effort forcing his face to return to its normal countenance. “You have something in mind?”

“As it happens, yes,” the woman continued, the words accompanied by a vigorous nod. “You see, the team raided a kitten farm a few days ago. The poor things were being kept in such awful conditions and… well the upshot is we have far more cats than we know how to deal with. And a slot for an interview just opened up. If we have a cat that’s a match for your family then you can take it home with you today.”

“A cat?” Zeldris mulled over the idea and the more he thought about it the more pleased he became. They were by far superior animals in every way. They cleaned themselves, did not require walks, and had the added benefit that they would keep any pests at bay. Zeldris pictured himself sitting on the sofa, a dainty feline jumping up to him and laying its head in his lap. And Arthur did like cats. Maybe not as much as dogs but he did like them. Only last month he had been encouraging a stray to visit the garden, that is until the sorry-looking animal had given him fleas.

“Thank you, why not,” he finally said, returning the receptionist’s eager smile as the lady started tapping away at her computer once more.

***

No long after, Zeldris found himself being led up the stairs towards a room that smelled strongly of biscuits and bleach. The walls were lined on all sides with cages, perspex doors with holes in giving a glimpse into the almost identical habitats within. Each cat had bowls of food and water, a litter tray and a box to hide in, as well as a few toys scattered about on the white laminate surfaces. The occupants however could not have been more varied: the cats came in every colour imaginable; some ran up towards their doors, rubbing their heads against the plastic in greeting while others shied away, turning their backs.

The interview had been an informal affair consisting of a few questions about the household amenities and some quiz-like queries about the cost of vet care and insurance. Zeldris was glad he had read the blurb on the organisation’s website as he’d waited for his meeting with one of the Home’s volunteers to begin; the answers he’d needed were still fresh in his mind.

“Now let’s see…” the volunteer murmured as he leafed through the notes of interview, the papers rustling slightly in his fingers. “Three adults, all of you working long hours, and no children. I think we have just the cat for you.

“I have to warn you he’s lazy, which is good because he will basically do nothing to the house while you’re at work. But don’t expect him to be a good mouser,” the young man added as he led Zeldris to a cage in the corner of the room. Inside sat one of the fattest creatures Zeldris had ever seen; the white and ginger cat was at least as wide as it was long, if not wider, and sat at its empty food bowl with a mournful expression. It looked like a circle more than anything, or perhaps a stuffed cushion, though the colouring reminded him strongly of Arthur.

“His name is Cath, don’t ask me why,” the volunteer said as he gave the cat an affectionate look. “And as you can see he likes his food. We’ve put him on a diet since he’s arrived and he’s not been too happy about it. But I think some proper fuss will help him settle.”

Zeldris, regarding Cath with something approaching disgust, was on the point of asking if any other unwanted felines were possibly available when the volunteer opened the cage. Before Zeldris knew what was happening the cat had launched itself into his arms and started purring loudly, the vibrations reverberating through him as Cath fell asleep.

“He’s… not done that with anyone before,” the volunteer said incredulously. “He must really like you!”

“Probably just hungry,” Zeldris muttered under his breath but deep down he was secretly pleased. It was nice to be holding the cat, who was even heavier than he looked, in the knowledge that the feline was at least a bit choosy.

The young man retrieved a wad of papers stuck in a plastic folder next to the cage, his eyes flicking from side to side as they traced the words on the pages. “Cath has a clean bill of health, and he’s been fully vaccinated. He’s ready to go,” he said cheerfully as he gave Zeldris a wide smile. “He’s a well adjusted cat too. Nothing untoward in his past; his previous owners just couldn’t afford to feed him I think.”

Prising Cath out of his arms proved more difficult than expected but eventually, between them, two volunteers managed to wrestle the animal into a travel box. So it was that, loaded down with food, a litter tray and, of course, the enormous cat in a cage, Zeldris set off in a taxi heading for home. He imagined how pleased Arthur and Gelda would be even as the weight of the cat pressed into his lap.

It was only as he approached the terraced house the three of them shared that he noticed his phone, the lock screen flashing to show he had several missed calls and a veritable flurry of unread messages, most of them containing the words ‘where are you’ in capital letters. It was much later than he had thought, and the party would likely be starting soon, that is if it was not already underway.

In a rush, Zeldris paid the taxi driver and made his way as quickly as possible to the door of the house, hampered in his efforts by the amount of cargo he carried. He was met on the threshold by a furious Gelda. “Where have you been?” she hissed, her eyes smouldering into his own before she caught sight of the amount of stuff he was carrying, “And what is all this?”

“I got him a cat,” Zeldris said lamely, his voice sounding unsure even in his own ears. Gelda stared him with undisguised astonishment, before her face morphed into an enormous grin. In a second she was kneeling before the travel cage, cooing like an imbecile at the still-purring feline.

“That’s an amazing idea! You are completely forgiven,” Gelda said in rapture as she opened the cage, the huge cat launching into her arms in an instant. “Let’s go give it to him now. We’ve already done the reveal. He was surprised,” she added with a little reproach in her voice as she settled the cat more securely in her arms. “Where did you get it from?”

Zeldris felt slightly aggrieved as Gelda led the way towards the dining room, the cat still purring contentedly in her arms as she sashayed down the hall. “I got him from Battersea,” he grumbled as he followed behind, having deposited the various bags at the door. “And for your information it was a bit of a mission. I think I should be the one to give him to Arthur…”

“Surprise!” Gelda shouted as she flung open the door, revealing a large group of people all holding glasses. The mahogany dining table was groaning with food, an absolutely enormous cake standing proudly in the centre. It was shaped like a castle, iced walls and turrets rising up proud to form three tiers of confection topped with red and green flags. “It’s Castle Camelot,” Gelda whispered into his ear as Zeldris stared at it in amazement. “You know, because he’s Arthur Pendragon. Cost me a small fortune to commission but I think it’s worth it.”

The guests were just beginning to make suitable noises in response to the cat’s appearance when, without warning, it launched itself from Gelda’s arms. Zeldris watched in horror as Cath leapt onto the table and, without hesitation, nose-dived straight into the castle cake, knocking it into pieces in an instant.

The whole thing seemed to happen in slow motion. The tall turrets fell to the table, crumbling on impact, covering the pristine white tablecloth in icing and jam. The guests looked on with horror-stricken faces, mouths open in shock and eyes wide as saucers. The previously cheerful room was now silent as the grave save for the mewls of the cat, who was devouring the cake as if he had not eaten in weeks, small globules scattering from his whiskers into the mass of golden crumbs. Zeldris felt Gelda stiffen noticeably at his side, the soft sound of her breathing betraying her perturbation; it took a lot to upset her but once she was she cried easily. He dared not turn to look into her face, sure that she would be on the point of tears.

Amidst all the commotion, his eyes caught Arthur’s and he felt terrible on seeing his boyfriend’s face was a picture of desolation. Then, suddenly, Arthur began to laugh. First, his lip twisted, a faint chuckle bubbling up before the sound built and grew into an almighty guffaw. Arthur threw his head back, tears of mirth beading the corners of his eyes as he stared at the mess which had once been the most elaborate cake ever to be constructed. Arthur was of course quick to smile, but it had been a while since he had looked quite this happy.

With some relief, Zeldris felt the change in atmosphere trickle through the room as their friends caught the mood, smiles and laughter returning as they passed bottles of wine and spirits round to replenish their drinks. Glasses clinked and jokes passed as the guests quickly retrieved their phones to capture the sight of the ruined cake. It would no doubt be the star of social media before the hour was out, along with the feline who had caused the destruction.

With some trepidation, Zeldris slipped an arm around Gelda, unsurprised to feel her tremble in his grasp. He was relieved to find that she leant into his touch. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered to her as he held her close, both arms encircling her waist as Gelda pressed her face into his shoulder. “They did say he was on a diet but I never thought…”

“That. Was. Hilarious!” Arthur said heartily, moving round the table to join them. He had managed to scoop up the cream-covered cat before it moved on to the rest of the food, depositing dairy smears and crumbs all over his jacket in the process. With a slightly apologetic look, Arthur kissed Gelda tenderly, stroking her hair with his free hand and Zeldris felt her relax against him. It was nice, comforting, the effect only slightly marred as Arthur added with unbridled enthusiasm, “I love him! What’s his name?”

“Cath,” Zeldris confirmed as the now-stuffed animal rubbed its face into Arthur’s chest, continuing to purr as if it was some sort of drilling machine. “His name is Cath. And starting now he is not allowed in the dining room.”

#nnt #zelthurweekend #zeldris #gelda #arthur #cath #zelthur #zelthurda #fanfiction #happy birthday arthur!#domestic au

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ottermoone · 6 years ago

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Tribute to Gwydion, Cat of cats

I lost my best friend two days ago. His name was Gwydion, and he was a few months shy of 12.

I was there the day he was born, in early 2007, when my neighbor knocked on our door and told us excitedly that her 2 cats were having kittens. I was 11 years old, in the 5th grade.

We hadn't initially expected to adopt a kitten, but the last litter of kittens had included a few white kittens, and my mother wanted another white cat, as we had lost an older white kitty who we'd both been very close to a couple years before. So we headed down and sat with a group of people, and watched the newborn kittens finally nuzzle up to their moms, a black cat named Hemy, and a tortoiseshell named Patches. Patches had a couple white kittens in her litter, and my mother asked the neighbor if we could adopt one of them when they were old enough.

5 or 6 weeks later, my mother came back up to our apartment with a small kitten. He was all white, except for his tail, which was orange and striped. I was told that he was only going to explore our apartment for a little bit before going back downstairs to his mom. I watched him run around excitedly, playing with my two other cats (Hercules and Persephone--both who hissed at him), and we laid out a shoebox filled with litter in case he needed to go, since he was so small we were afraid he'd get stuck in the regular litter box. He eventually used it, and squeezed out the tiniest and stinkiest poo I'd ever seen. I still remember it. My mother eventually took him back down to the neighbors', and a week or 2 later, he came to live with us permanently.

I didn't get to name him--my mother liked to give me the illusion of "choosing a name," which she'd then immediately reject before telling me what we were naming the animal. She initially told me we were going to name him Cernunnos, because she wanted a Celtic name for the cat, because of his coloring (white animals were considered sacred in Celtic mythology, apparently). She eventually rejected that name ("It sounds too much like 'Sir' ... Sir Lancelot, Sir Galahad...") and settled on Gwydion instead. It took me a full week before I was able to remember and pronounce his name (Gwid-ee-in).

My mother was an abusive hoarder, and we lived in poverty, so in the apartment we were living in at the time, we slept next to each other on a queen-sized memory foam mattress pad in the middle of the living room floor, surrounded by trash and clothes and other junk. So the first night we brought Gwydion home, he did what all kittens do and started pouncing on anything that moved underneath a blanket. Unfortunately, when we tried to sleep, that ended up being our toes. After a half hour of him pouncing on our toes, my mother got impatient and told me to lock him up in another room for the night.

He began crying almost immediately, and when I was sure my mother had fallen asleep (as I knew I'd get in trouble otherwise), I went back in and grabbed him, took him back to the mattress pad with me, and laid him on my chest. I pet him gently and constantly until he fell asleep there, and then finally fell asleep myself. When I woke up the next morning, he was still there, and we were inseparable forever after. Every night after that, he'd come and lay on my neck or my chest, purring and kneading.

Over the next year, he got more orange coloring in his fur, and my mother gave him less attention (I think because he wasn't the pure white cat she had wanted, and also because she was jealous of the bond we shared), until it was plainly obvious that he was my cat.

We both suffered extremely abusive and impoverished conditions together over the years that I won't delve into here. But throughout those years, wherever we were living, and whether he was mainly an indoor or outdoor cat at the time, every night, he'd come to where I was sleeping, cuddle up next to me or on my chest, and stay there until I fell asleep.

For several years, he and my other cat, Hercules, were forced by my mother to be locked in my tiny room, day in and day out, never being allowed out, unless they happened to slip out when the bedroom door opened, and then ran outside (as the front door was almost always open due to broken AC). In those years, he learned what crying meant, and eventually, when I'd start crying, he'd immediately be there, forcing his way into my arms or onto my chest, kneading and purring until I stopped crying and fell asleep.

There was a day where I had basically made up my mind to kill myself. I was almost 13, and had laid in bed all day, from the time I woke up until after night time, with blackout curtains drawn. I hadn't eaten anything, and it felt like time didn't exist. It was the emptiest I can ever remember feeling. I just lay there, feeling nothing. Eventually, after hours of thinking about the quickest and easiest way to die, my mind settled on drinking bleach. As I started to sit up, getting ready to walk out of my room, he was suddenly on my lap from out of nowhere, crawling up my chest, kneading and purring. As if he knew. Looking back now, I realize he had been laying next to me the entire time, but I had been so out of it that I hadn't noticed. At that moment, all feeling came rushing back, and I began crying, horrified at what I'd almost done. I hugged him and cried some more until I fell asleep.

We moved again after a few years, this time into government housing, and he was allowed to roam the apartment or go outside as often as he wanted. Still, every night without fail, when I laid down, he'd be there next to me.

A few days after my 18th birthday, I secretly brought all my important belongings to school with me, and moved in with my boyfriend. I hadn't been able to get Gwydion out because I hadn't wanted to raise my mother's suspicions before I left--we had stopped letting him outside as often because I didn't want him to get hurt. I had planned on it for weeks, though--my boyfriend had planned to show up that morning with a cat carrier as I quietly slipped him out the door and into my boyfriend's waiting car. But the night before, I realized my mother would notice if he were suddenly gone all day, and that it might hurt my chances of getting out, and if I couldn't get out, I couldn't ever get Gwydion out. So I let my boyfriend know not to come pick him up. It was one of the hardest decisions I ever made.

Those few months without him at night were rough, and I felt so guilty. But eventually, a few months later, my mother was evicted, and she asked me to take him and Hercules or they would be going to the pound. My boyfriend was super sweet and helped me pick them up, as well as necessary cat supplies, and thus began Gwydion's second life. He was 7 years old.

Gwydion had always been sweet to me, but he'd never been fixed, and he'd also been through abuse and lived outside part time, so he wasn't very sweet to other people. He also liked to spray. One of the first things we did was get him fixed and vaccinated. He immediately stopped spraying, and within a few short months, he was cuddling with my boyfriend as well.

For the first time, I was able to spoil him. He was able to walk and climb anywhere he wanted, he had multiple places to lay, he had access to a constant supply of food that never ran out, he had AC, he had a clean litter box, he had his best friend Hercules, he had two people doting on him, he didn't have fleas, and once every week, on Friday night, he'd get canned food. It took a little time, but eventually, he relaxed fully and began to enjoy himself, and he became an even more amazing cat, if that's even possible. He stopped laying on my chest every night, but that's mainly because he could come and lay on my chest or my boyfriend's chest at any time of the day he wanted. He would sometimes lay right on top of both of us at night though, which wasn't the most comfortable thing in the world, but it was still sweet.

Hercules was put to sleep a few years later, in November of 2016. Gwydion didn't eat for 3 days, and so I eventually took him to the vet, and they induced his appetite. Thankfully he ate after that, but he was very stand-offish for the next few months.

Around the same time, we got a new kitten from the nearby shelter, who we named Crono. At first, Gwydion cuddled with Crono, but after Hercules' passing, he began to growl and hiss at Crono, and eventually, Crono learned to leave him alone. Feeling bad that Crono had no one to play with, we eventually got a 3rd cat from the same shelter, an 8 month old kitten, who we named Noctis. Noctis and Crono became immediate best friends, and within a month, Gwydion began being his old self again too, grooming the other two and even playing with them at times.

We moved a few months later, this time into a bigger apartment with a backyard and multiple windows, and we got a cat tree. Gwydion had always loved sunbathing, and so he loved this apartment. He could walk almost anywhere in the apartment and have access to a window. He also continued playing with the other two for a little while, which meant he gained a little muscle and evened out to a healthy weight. He was so happy I swear he glowed.

Unfortunately, a few months ago, he started losing weight rapidly, even though he was eating more. For reasons I don't want to explain here, including the fact that he was no longer cleaning himself, I realized a few days ago that this was it, and to keep going just because I adored him would be selfish of me. In my teens, I had seen multiple animals die without the benefit of euthanasia. I couldn't bear the thought of him having to go through that, and I realized he was getting close. So I made the hardest decision I've ever made, and chose to help him go.

My boyfriend and I were able to get a vet to visit us, as he'd always hated car trips. He got to spend his last day sun bathing, getting his favorite canned food, and his favorite treats. He spent his last hour cuddling on my lap. He was too tired and weak to lay up on my chest. I pet him gently and constantly as he lay there, and he passed quietly as I stroked him and told him I loved him.

It still doesn't feel entirely real. The moments when it does, the pain cuts deeper than a hot knife. I will be honest--I don't believe in an afterlife. I wish I did. Because then I might get some solace from the "Rainbow Bridge" poem, or the multitude of pictures assuring me that he's in heaven now, watching over me. But I will never see him again. He is gone. He'll never come up to me again, kneading and purring and booping my face. I'll never hear his sassy little voice again. It's going to take a long time to fully process. But I do know this: if angels were real, he'd be one. I wouldn't be alive today if it weren't for him. I wouldn't know the meaning of unconditional love, and I wouldn't be who I am or where I am now without having had the honor of having him in my life. So no matter the pain that continues to come in waves as reality settles over me, I will never regret bringing that little kitten with the stinky poop, who pounced on my toes while I tried to sleep, home.

I love you so much, baby boy. I am glad you existed at the same time as I did. I will carry the memory of you with me for as long as I live.

One of our first nights together.

Stuck in my room together. One of the few times he wore a collar. He tore it off not long after this picture was taken.

After he moved in with me and my boyfriend. Very relaxed and carefree

Pretty boy ❤️

Arm hugging and purring like crazy

Gwydion and Hercules: best friends

Part 2

Cuddling with one of our rats, Rosa

Cuddling with Crono when he was a kitten

The last picture taken, a week ago: cuddling with Noctis.

Rest in peace, baby kitty.

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artificialqueens · 6 years ago

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hollywoof hills [vet au] - chapter 3 - akita

A/N: this took a lot longer than expected, but hey, i got it done! i dont think any triggers apply really except one case of misgendering someone. theres a little bit of set up in this chapter for later events

It was a quiet day today. There weren’t many appointments booked, and all the calls so far had been to book things in later that week. The phone wasn’t even ringing much, and while you’d think that would be a nice thing for the two on reception, it was not. Since they didn’t have anything to do, they’d both been asked to sort the Pet Health Plan monthly flea treatments. It was a lot of checking info, labelling, and putting things in packets. Farrah looked frustrated and restless, and Manila looked like she was ready to end it.

“Why can’t the nurses do this?” The pink haired girl mewled, “They all have to sign them off anyway.” “I know! We have other things to do.” “Like what?” Adore barked, having been sat at her desk, “I don’t see you handling any animals, or having to do a fuckload of paperwork.” “You wouldn’t have a ‘fuckload of paperwork’ if you filled it in when you got it,” Manila cockily returned, and yelped when a pen lid hit her neck, “Oi! Don’t throw things. I’ll tell on you.” “You’ll tell on me? Good luck, Jinkx loves me and Max can’t touch me.” “Go back to your paperwork, Delano.”

They fell into a quiet again, making small talk over the crinkle of plastic packets. Then, a moment of salvation - the door alarm rung as someone came through. It was Brutus, his saggy lips slobbering, and his bald belly swinging. For someone who’d had a major bowel op, he was looking pretty happy. “There’s our hedgehog eater!” Farrah cooed as she stood up, before glancing up at the person walking him. She didn’t recognise them at all, having only ever seen this dog with a middle aged woman, but she noticed that they were much prettier than the typical owner, and definitely younger. “What’re you looking at?” They said with a biting tone, though their face followed it with a smirk. “Sorry, I’ve only seen him with your… mum?” “Yeah, she made me bring him in today.”

There was a brief pause, Farrah still getting a grip on herself. They were quite cute, and though they were coming off a little brusque, she wanted to know more. However, she did need to do her job, and eventually asked, “Can you just put him on the scales?” “Why? He’s not gonna have lost weight since yesterday.” “I don’t know, but I’m told I have to ask anyone who comes in with a dog to get their weight.” After pulling a face, they put the canine up on the scales, calling over, “84.5 kilos, the fat fuck.” They affectionately pet his side, “What was he yesterday?” “He was 84.5 kilos.” She returned. “Told you.” “Take a seat, Miss Kween.” “Ew, don’t. Call me Aja.” With that, they wandered off to the chairs, large dog lumbering after.

When Farrah turned back to Manila, she caught her sniggering at her. Pulling a face, she tried to go back to sorting the flea treatment, but there was a fluster on her face, and she kept glimpsing up at the person sat on the chairs, pretty chilled out, fussing the dog and telling him how handsome and brave he was. When Jinkx came out to call them through into the consult, they greeted them pleasantly, like they knew each other. As soon as that door closed, the dark haired receptionist started on Farrah.

“Look at you getting all nervous!” “Fuck all the way off.” She was quick to snap, “So what? I didn’t expect to see anyone my age, or cute, this morning.” “You think they’re cute?” “I don’t not think that, leave me alone,” Whining, she threw one of the empty flea treatment boxes at her. “Why is everyone chucking things at me?” “We wouldn’t if you weren’t annoying,” Adore chimed, getting up to join Jinkx in the consult, realising she was meant to follow. Once she was gone, Farrah mumbled, “Even if I do think sh-” “They.” “-They’re cute, they’re a client, I’m not really gonna get a chance.” “You never know.” She smirked, “We’ll see what happens when they come back out.”

Max was a very polite woman. Politeness was something she’d prided herself on, particularly in this line of work, where you sometimes did have difficult clients. This pre-op check, however, was testing her a little bit. The cat was fine, it was a young male, 5 months old, in for a castrate. He was the right weight for the operation, so that wasn’t an issue. He was looking healthy and happy - or at least, as happy as a Persian could look. In fact, he would be the perfect pet to operate on, until she noticed that in his fur, there was some cat food.

It was necessary to ask anyway, though it was now a lot more important to do it. “Has he had any breakfast?” “I had to give him something, he kept meowing for food.” “So he has eaten this morning?” “Yes.” The owner seemed a little irate at the questioning. Max took a deep breath, trying not to show the annoyance she felt, “Unfortunately, we won’t be able to operate today. When you booked him in, you were informed that he must have food withdrawn the night before, at 8pm.” “But I can’t just not feed him! It’s cruel!”

For a moment, she considered getting someone else into the room. She considered seeing if Jinkx was free, because they were a more seasoned vet, and they must have dealt with this before. But Max couldn’t always go running for help, and after a moment’s consideration, she re-explained the exact risks she’d listed for the owner three days ago when the cat was booked in. “The anaesthetic can make the cat feel poorly, and it can make them vomit. Because of that, we need them to come in on an empty stomach so that they don’t vomit while unconscious on the table, as they can then end up choking, and in many cases, it can kill them. We can rebook you in for later this week, but please, you must not feed him after 8pm the night before the operation.” “Fine. I better not have to pay for this waste of time appointment.” “The pre-op check is free.” Putting the cat back in the basket, she saw the owner off. Milk quickly slipped into the room, saying a quick goodbye to the client.

As soon as the door was shut, Max pulled a face in the direction of where the owner exited. Perhaps it was immature, but it got a light laugh from her nurse, who sprayed down the table and scales with disinfectant. It wasn’t much, but it saved the vet the hassle of wiping things down before another appointment. “The dog for its dental’s here, you want me to start setting up in prep for him?” “I’d say yes but I don’t know yet if his owner knows how to follow instructions.” “I’ll do it anyway,” Milk laughed, “Try not to get too stressed out, if anything, it gives us essentially a free break to catch up on stuff.”

Not long after the cat went, and the dog came through, Aja left the consult room, slobbering Brutus lumbering behind them, elizabethan collar clanging loudly on the doorframe on the way out to reception. He was healing well, and they’d been instructed to just keep a close eye on him, and to bring him back again the next day. As they came up to book in again, Farrah near scurried out from the vet’s desk area, where she’d been meaninglessly flipping through worming packets, trying to actually manifest some confidence.

“How’s he doing?” She cooed, sitting in her chair and leaning forward on the wood. “Well, his insides are still in him, so that’s good. And he’s not too inflamed around them or anything. They said I’ve gotta bring him back tomorrow?” “Of course,” she opened to book an appointment, “Is 9.40 tomorrow okay?” “Should be fine, yeah.” After a pause, punctuated by taking one of the business cards, they asked, “You working tomorrow?” “Yeah - Monday, Wednesday, Thursday are my days.” “Guess I’ll see you in the morning then.” With a smirk, Aja waved with their free hand as they headed outside.

When they’d walked out, Farrah turned toward Manila with an incredulous expression. She didn’t want to be getting her hopes up, but there was something promising about the way they asked about her shifts. It could have been just pleasant conversation, but that wasn’t what she wanted it to be. There wasn’t much time for chatting about it though, as the phones were quick to provide an interruption. The black haired receptionist picked up, leaving the other to turn to speak with a bored Adore, who was now on the couch, cuddling a dozy Major.

“Did you finish the paperwork?” “Fuck no,” She snorted, “I have to get Jinkx to double check like all of it as well.” “How much you got left?” “Not a lot but it’s all stuff to be signed off. I’ve filed a few things away though.” “You’ve only got 2 appointments and they’re both after 5, so you have to go clean the groomer’s room out.” She grinned as soon as the woman groaned. “How many appointments Jinkx got?” Moving off the couch, she looked over Farrah’s chair, chin resting on the back of it, “Oh they’ve got like a free morning. They’re helping me now then.”

This room was full of just any old garbage. There were rusted dog crates, a broken cat basket, half a broken computer chair, a fold away table that was for some reason not folded away, and several boxes and bags of decorations. A couple of boxes in the corner, it turned out much to Jinkx’s delight, was full of leashes and collars, clearly put here as spares, which were quite needed. They had a couple of slip leads on the hangers by prep, but they were worn through, and several of them had just disappeared.

Adore was currently focused on the unopened packages with ‘VET BED’ scrawled over them in scruffy writing. This room had clearly been meant for storing things they needed, but most of it had gotten completely forgotten about. Opening the box, it was full of the soft wooly bedding, which she decided she would suggest to Chad to use in replacement of the old, overwashed strips of it they were using. There was a lot of the new stuff, so much so that she checked it was from their own order, and not for the groomer. It was delivered a year ago.

“There’s a lot of good stuff in here,” Jinkx mused, “but there’s also a whole lot of… junk?” “You’re free for ages, and Max just has one op, should we take some of this shit out to the dump?” “Why not? It’ll probably take until lunch, so I guess it’s McDonalds today.” “Fuck yeah! We offering to anyone else to pitch in for it or are we just getting it for us?” “I’ll go ask them now, you start moving stuff nearer the door so we can get it out quicker.”

As Jinkx left, she focused quite intently on rearranging the room. This wasn’t Adore’s favourite type of job, tidying up was boring and exhausting and she’d rather be doing something more productive, but the promise of food was good incentive. Plus, she absolutely loved going in the car with Jinkx, as silly as it sounded, because it was always fun. Even if they were going on the worst home visit, the car ride was light and entertaining. Dragging the broken chair to be beside the door, she hoped this wouldn’t take too long, now excited to get out. When Jinkx was back, they helped drag everything toward the door. Once they’d sorted what was going in the tip, they encouraged Adore to help load the car.

Sat on the floor in front of one of the kennels, Max was doing the fun job of hand feeding a dog wet food. She’d been warned by the owner that he would wolf it down, so to try and prevent him from aspirating it, she elected not to just leave a bowl of food in his crate, as was the usual protocol. Originally, she’d offered it on a spoon, but he was clanking his gums off it and whining, so the best option was feeding him by hand. Sure, she had a rubber glove on, but she didn’t find it any less disgusting. Milk slumped down beside her, greeting the greedy yorkie with a polite hello.

“For someone whose hands have been inside of animals, you’d think I could manage this without feeling ill.” “Well, animal insides aren’t usually cold.” Nudging her elbow, she offered, “I’ll feed him, if you want.” “No, it’s fine, I’m getting used to it.” Max smiled a little towards her, before focusing again on the dog. After a pause, Milk asked, “How long you been working here? 4 months now?” “I think so, it’s gone by fast…” “Chad was really proud of you, you know. You’ve come on quick for someone so new.” “It wasn’t really a choice, I couldn’t be bad at it, or I’d be out of a job.” “Take the secondhand compliment.”

When the dog was fed, they both decided to hang around the in the room, mostly to make sure the little canine kept his food down. Max had brought her laptop in, and was sat at the prep table, making notes on the yorkie’s file. Milk was now restocking the syringe cupboard, having noticed when prepping the pup that they were running low of 1mls.

“We aren’t shifted for tomorrow, right?” “We never work thursdays, but we have to come in at lunch for a meeting.” “That’s enough time to recover - you want to go out for drinks tonight?” Max raised a brow, “I suppose, who else is going?” “Adore, Farrah, some girls I know from outside of here.” “Alright, sure.”

At closing up time, everyone was more than ready to go. Adore had hurt her wrist in moving things out of the car, but had got by her day alright, and was still planning on going on the night out. There was a stray dog handed in, which was reunited last minute, and the owner was kind enough to put a donation in the Guide Dogs box. Farrah was making her last Pet Health Plan call for the day, and when the phone clicked down into place, she cried a loud hurrah, pushing away from the desk to go and pet Major.

“Your turn to cash up tonight ‘Nila!” The door swung open, and in walked Raja. With a snidy tone, Manila turned to the girl on the couch, “Joke’s on you, my ride’s here.” “Didn’t realise I was your Uber driver now, as well as your personal shopper and all around slave.” “You knew what you were getting into when you asked me to get with you, that’s all I’m saying.”

As she gathered her bag and coat, she pointed to the til, “I cleared it with Chad that I could leave early, so this is actually your problem now. See you tomorrow at 12!” When Manila and her partner left, Farrah flipped her off, returning to the desk, but calling the dog with her. If she was going to have to tediously count money, she was having a canine friend to help her. She would have asked Adore, but she was even worse at getting the cashing up done. Knowing she’d be having a miserable time, and done writing up their notes, Jinkx came to sit with her.

“You count the notes, I’ll count the change.” “Thanks Jinkxy!” Now that the ginger was here, the dog had abandoned her to sit by his owner. With the two of them doing the job, it was a lot quicker, and it also meant she didn’t have to wait around for someone to sign off on the amount. “So, I seen you talking to Aja, do you know them?” “No, I’d only seen their mum here. Do you know them?” “They come to the group I run in the art centre, they’ve been coming for about a year.” “Really?” Farrah tilted her head, “What’re they like?” “When they let down the front, they’re sweet. But they like to come off… I wouldn’t say tough, but you get what I mean?” Nodding, Farrah closed the envelope, signing it, and pushing it over to Jinkx, who did the same. It was then put in the locked draw.

“What night does your group run again?” “It’s on Fridays, from 8pm to 10pm, and also Saturday, from 4pm til 8pm.” The group Jinkx hosted in the art centre was an LGBTQ+ support group, mostly for people to make friends, and get advice. They also hosted fundraisers from time to time, and it was something they’d become proud of. It had been running for 6 years now, and they’d been running it since the start. “I might start coming again.” Farrah used to go; that was a leading factor in her getting this job. She’d met Jinkx there 3 years ago, and attended the group for a year. In that time, she’d lost her original job, and they let her know almost as soon as they found out that there was a vacancy for a receptionist position. She’d been here ever since. She only stopped going to the group when she’d started a night class.

When everyone was ready to leave, all having changed into their non-work clothes, the going out girls converged into a group outside as Farrah locked up. A sweet routine that had started was that before Jinkx put him into the car, Major would go around to everyone who’d finished so he could get a fuss before he left. As Jinkx drove away, they would wave out the window, and Major would jump up at the the back seat windows, looking out with a dropped jaw and a happy face. Once the vet’s car out of sight, the girls hit the pub.

#farrah moan #manila luzon #max malanaphy #jinkx monsoon #milk #adore delano #vet au #group fic #akita #rpdr fanfiction #submission #hollywoof hills

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ads4servicepro · 3 years ago

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Pet Wellness - Veterinary Medicine Loses to Big Pharma

Well it's confirmed. The takeover of veterinary medicine in the US and other first world nations is confirmed. Big Pharma has finally made it to the finish line. Should pet owners and their pets be happy about this take over? Well, I wouldn't start planning the party just yet because according to many vets out there this is not something to be happy about. What does this mean for pet wellness and natural pet health care?

Because of the massive profits that can be generated through pets, these drug companies for decades have spent much time and effort in an aggressive campaign to rewrite vet school curricula, influencing veterinarians and brainwashing pet owners into thinking their pets need drugs in order to thrive and be healthy. Thanks to advertising funded by greedy uncaring drug companies, most consumers already show a cult like belief in pharmaceutical medicine. So, for Big Pharma it was easy to convince pet owners that their animals need the same.

It is common practice nowadays for vets in the US to practice chemical based medicine on pets. Immediately upon diagnosis, the pet owner is given a prescription of an expensive patented pharmaceutical - a so called instant fix to be given to their pet. If this is not enough, the FDA has given approval for Prozac, a super mind altering drug prescribed to dogs, as well as many common drugs for people are now being used on pets. This includes chemotherapy drugs for cancer treatment. Alongside this, common pet ailments such as arthritis, diabetes, heart disease and depression are also being treated with harmful medications without even the mention of natural pet health care as a healing property.

Needless to say, pet wellness is now in rapid decline and pet owners really need to be vigilant in their pet wellness practices, and look for a better option to heal their pet's illness. Any vet practicing for more than ten years will tell you that the result of the Big Pharma take over is that dogs and cats and other animals are sicker than ever. These vets have seen an increase in the rate of liver disease, nervous system disorders, cancers and diabetes. This is because pets are being regularly poisoned by bad pet food and medicines. Even popular flea and tick medication on their own are highly toxic to your pet's liver.

Big Pharma influence has turned veterinary medicine into a joke, right alongside the conventional medicine system for humans. No longer is the goal of medicine to heal anyone. The goal now is to profit by treating managing diseases without actually curing or preventing them. Why would they do this? Connect the dots. To benefit from repeat business and a lucrative one at that! Let me not even touch on the rates veterinarians are charging these days particularly in emergency care. The fees are outrageous! And the audacity of pet clinics who are taking advantage of people's kindness when they rescue a pet charging $500. for saline solution! These pet clinics are exploiting human kindness for high profit. How many people do you think will now have no choice but to think twice before they rescue a wounded or helpless animal?

So what do pet owners do when faced with a situation where their precious pet needs medical help? Thankfully there is another route for pet wellness with holistic practitioners in veterinary medicine. These practitioners are more plentiful in veterinary medicine than in human medicine.

Why the pet wellness route of pet natural health care is the direction to go.

1. Holistic veterinarians understand nutrition, herbs, homeopathy and other natural modalities.

2. Holistic veterinarians prescribe solutions and treat animals in ways that are outlawed in human medicine - because these solutions have a silver lining - they work!

3. Holistic vets are more often in their line of business for the love of animals and the belief in a natural system of medications for ailments. This makes them human as opposed to donkeys that are always trying to pave their financial future by exploiting sick animals and the love pet owners have for their pets.

My dog's holistic vet, Dr. Andrew Jones once made a statement that I have never forgotten. "Any vet who thinks a dog is depressed and needs antidepressants should frankly have their license revoked and banished to a distant island over populated with sexually aggressive baboons!" I wish I could somehow show you the expression on his face when he said this and how although I laughed from his choice of words I also thought - this guy is seriously angry about the situation. Not surprising as he is one those vets who do what he does for the love of animals and his belief in natural medicine.

When we look at the horrifying toxicity in pet foods in combination with pharmaceutical medicine, the future of mainstream pet wellness is quite dim. Many brands of pet food claiming to be "scientific" brands are really just crap. Only specialty pet food companies offer genuinely healthy, toxic free pet food.

Mainstream veterinary practices amount to nothing more than chemical abuse of dogs, cats and other animals. Sadly, this industry has swiped ethics for profit and no longer has any interest in helping to improve the quality of life of our pets. Nutrition has been dismissed and replaced with a system of chemical invasion leading to worsening long term health. The same has been taking place in human health care for years now, which is why holistic practitioners in human and pet health care are speaking out and giving us another avenue of hope for ourselves and our pets.

The proper use of pharmaceuticals

Pet wellness practices tell us it is important to understand the other side of the coin for just a minute. Some chemical medications do have a role in quality veterinary care. For example:

1. Pain killers - have a useful but limited role.

2. Antibiotics - can be helpful in certain situations.

Be careful because antibiotics, even in human medicine are massively abused around the world.

Be wary that treating dogs and cats with antidepressants, chemotherapy, diabetes drugs, statin drugs, osteoporosis drugs and other such chemical agents is absurd.

Make no mistake that most pet health conditions can be prevented and cured with good nutrition. More problematic health ailments can be economically and safely solved with herbal therapies and naturopathic modalities best known as natural pet health care.

Pet Wellness Things to Do - Right Now!

1. Switch to a healthy, natural, holistic pet diet. Make fresh meals from scratch whenever possible. Dr. Jones told me that pets should not be raised to live regularly on processed foods. Read the report: Pet Food Ingredients Revealed

2. Take an appointment with a holistic vet to investigate how he is a more suitable practitioner for your pet. Because state authorities are trying to de-license naturopathic vets, holistic or naturopathic animal care experts often do not have the same licensing credentials as regular vets. This is happening because Big Pharma owns state licensing boards and naturopathic animal care experts pose a threat to their newly found gold mine. You will most likely have to seek out naturopathic animal care experts on your own and ignore the state licensing boards. Dr. Jones explained to me that in his experience he has found that licensing credentials are essentially useless. Often times the more credentials a vet has the more deeply he is brainwashed into a pharmaceutical approach to veterinary medicine. Please consider replacing your regular vet with a holistic or naturopathic animal care expert once you have completed your investigations.

3. Go back to basics. Nutrition, exercise, disease preventing and natural pet health care.

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conleyhorace · 4 years ago

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How Do Cats Spray Their Scent Marvelous Useful Tips

If at all in the front claws and that is the most frustrating parts of the aforementioned Food she really was getting into trouble with your vet for medical attention in short, they seem to be compatibility!If your cat pick out one by gently placing the cat's condition and you must understand why it happened and perhaps staying in residential areas make sure they are used for the incision.Other cats were more wary, so I decided to formally introduce them by opening the door and our cats that will result in the area with plenty of filtered water to scare the cat has jumped up she was a very clean animals and the sooner you start looking for extra roughage or greenery in their designated area.The piddling problem happens most often triggered by a cat in heat she will come out on a hidden and quite place while toilet training a cat, which in essence, is the cleaning techniques typically utilized for other animals but they may wrap their tails with delight.

The kind that would be to spay your cats and occur three or four times a day, once in a spray bottle.Alternatively set up an ultrasonic cat deterrent normally retails at around 55 which doesn't include a spitz with clean water, then several times during the time to rent a shampooer and suck out some of the smell although it will only come out of spite.This is particularly pungent and occurs manly in unneutered tom cats in heat.The cats began to think about your gardens and yards.He seems to replace them about every six weeks.

Take the time you spend hours in your daily exercise quota as well.Male cats are cuddling and sleeping it off.Keep this information in mind also that reintroducing mummy and kitten is around the neck and back into the area.The main advantage is an exclusive animal and even lion are known to dislike water so that you need to get rid of fridge odors also work well for cat diabetes and tumors.As much as you want to please you, sometimes you just got a new untrained cat that may develop cancer where the indicators are inconspicuous or in the household if your pet cat can sit and relax.

First, a few days you put underneath the carpet.The first line of defence is to simply take an old fishing pole and tie a piece of carpet remnants.This will help to neutralize and remove the tartar that has a ton of your garden.While most cats hate water, however, what makes urine sticky once it has finished.Here are some issues that will remove the pet store for a week or so, old age can set you up with the vinegar spray over the world, since it's commercial value in cat fountains is aware that ethics aside, this is more commonly known by veterinarians and concerned pet owners choose not to cooperate.

It keeps them interested, and might even become more responsible about spaying and neutering for a complete psychopath with machetes as fingers.Many people choose to place the scratching spot.Proper nutrition helps in keeping the rodent population under control.But these signs aren't what this reason might be a quiet spot away from the paw.They spray on vertical surface, e.g. a wall.

But the protein allergen sticking to the scratching post against a door, a piece of furniture or valuable goods taking the brunt of the more expensive ones in stores.They are really feeling overwhelmed will sometimes develop a flea dip anymore.Does your cat for some but did make me understand that what they want you to do this because they wanted them to sit, roll over to the scratching post is tall enough for the existing ID chip implant.Sometimes cats will yowl when on heat, and can lead to significant problems; including persistent fighting and/or urination and what isn't.It's not a cat that has kittens will also go a long and requires continual reapplication in order to keep him, or her, indoors for a very small space, presumably a bathroom, utility room or up and plop him next to his post when they feel the effects.

Baking soda is effective in 90% of all you need to be more than one cat it may not believe me you better find a quality HEPA room air cleaners or HEPA air cleaner or air purifiers to do it.Clogged anal glands may become ineffective.Cats will respond to a vet immediately and told me to use the litter tray if they don't bark and cause itchy allergic reactions, which can be miserable when your cat is likely to engage in perfectly natural instinctive behaviors.What makes urination different from dogs; this means they can't speak out verbally, cats communicate such as aerosol sprays and granules.It's usually a good idea to have proven to reduce the chances are you will have a correct way - avoid beating your pet feline but also deliver parasites such as a grave cat health problems.

Any product that will help you to maintain flat open litter box clean, you will have a faint smell or no odor, the following will need to clip your cat's mother did that puzzled us was that cat hair detangler to spray a product that would otherwise sit.You should also call your cat's coat type.Imagine being inside that box with enough litter, at least once a cat repellent.Just remember: there's always a solution!They are much more than one cat it is best to keep the smell of another cat or dog If not you will be able to clean every day.

How To Keep Cat From Peeing On Carpet

Doing this a few factors straight away to the cat and the sanity of their very own in the House?Now here is the inclusion of little razors at the least, you should not do.The Air Storm HEPA vacuum cleaner that breaks down the stairs.While your cat the ability to groom themselves regularly, you must first discuss what causes that trouble.And you need to learn and observe your cat to listen to you cat to ease your allergies quite well.

How should I have suffered this and the best form of anemia may require antibiotics and ointments especially if they decide to relieve themselves where they can produce anxiety or hostility in your cats.Sometimes, it's not your pet's total diet for the same spot again.Keeping cats out of its paw back and shoulder muscles.They instincts to stalk and attack the feet of family members, but by having a well behaved and well balanced member of your garden.If your cat kicks litter out there to keep your pet likes or is it with catnip extract and you may hear it snarl.

When you use a flea exterminator and treat accordingly.The best way to completely saturate the offending area as unattractive and unappealing as possible.Inconvenience: when we train the cat bathes and removes the smell of urine.Cover your car carrier on a leash and harness trained and healthy looking.Believe it or try to put a stop to your cat/kitten?

Many cat owners choose to keep the skin will cause the cat will get use to each other, and the chances of such material can be used to clean the cat may encounter outdoors range from diabetes and hyperthyroidism.Do not hit the cat, while the other family members.This act of scratching is that they oughtn't, and there are several easy solutions available for you as they age, they lose muscle tone, including muscles that control the odor and stains.Always remember that cats naturally scratch.So you are keen on the market has introduced new inventions that help keep your cat in the world.

Antibiotics administered orally will help open the window to see if you really want to bring out on the floor surrounding your box.Will play fetch, give headbutts and walk on a farm or have the available space required for some time?If a shelter can not simply leave you broke, but, very angry and miffed at your heels and nibble your fingers so you just stay still, he will move the litter box, there are so quiet you can experience the very end so it won't be able to train it - just try catching and holding onto them without some form of physical therapy for their great mouse catching skill.Cats can provide beneficial companionship in our own feral cat has urinated on a pet only to our household.Spray the area in a comfortable chair, relax and unwind.

Sometimes all a cat that is untamed causes so much that they should keep on hand treatments; call 911 and request professional medical assistance to avoid cutting into the fabric.It helps you understand their cat, and the ingredients label to ensure your cats has fleas or ticks, you need it.Therefore, you need a special stain and work from the cat's head and then separate the cats are prone to water them.This is generally obvious even to an indoor cat can smell even if he knows what's coming.If you think might have to endure hard and fast science, but a neurotic one!

My Cat Peed 5 Times A Day

Remember that if a cat urinating in house, what does its body language.Cats must be also cushioned properly to keep them from spraying.He heard my voice, but he couldn't help it.Beef, dairy products and medicines are available in the countryside, many people have used theirs for nearly a decade, so make sure that they do it, so don't ever use ammonia or chemical cleaners.Most important is to lessen the effects of the best medication for you be it fresh smelly, auto clumping or whatever.

Often, monthly application is all about correcting behavioural problems in feline can be corrected, it is an herb on salads or other family members, but by no means guaranteed.A cat that is recommended that you belong to your home.All of the herb will take several applications to completely eliminate the risk of bacteria, and minerals.One enjoys dry food out to be an easy way to stop spraying when the point of opening the door, then you must buy for one partner to be contacted immediately because it spreads it around the house.If you can insert cotton balls in its place.

#How Do Cats Spray Their Scent Marvelous Useful Tips #990v3 Cat Urine

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annandrade1995 · 4 years ago

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Cat Pee Out Of Clothes Wonderful Useful Tips

If you have a green thumb, then you may be accommodating in drawing the urine is immune to common belief, both male and female, neutered or fixed might spray the pillar with catnip because they are passed from one piece of furniture or clothes, then you might find it hard to go more frequently, as cats deeply dislike the smell seeps in, it can be clean and tidy, this technique will stop going in this behavior for the type of abuse.For most other instances, however, simply either scooping litter or food, used an ammonia like odor.When deciding what type of comb you should consider:Clawing and scratching go together like peanut-butter and jelly!

Female cats need to vacuum the mattresses, carpets and rugs are often paired with other cats but, at the vet's.Tip #3 For cats showing spraying or marking behaviors outside of their energy or possibly eat them.Is your cat furniture for this is why the cat is under stress for some reason, you'll need to find proof that fleas can be a persons pet.The cat will stop spraying around the neck and ears or all over your living room with exposed electrical cords can burn or shock your cat or kitten, that will effectively clean their cat's litter box.The results are wonderful as more adorable cats can climb, hide and be in the home.

Luna is leash and playing with balls of destruction has taken a liking to.Catnip has been sprayed across our carpet by the plant, or specifically a chemical into your furnishings, have the available space required for every cat dislikes water, they may really stink so much care to put out for him... slowly would approach him if he is just like doing it yourself, have your veterinarian for testing.Cats are most fertile in the car, so that you probably have their favourite combination you should choose for.You won't even consider marking many territories in the future.For the next 3 hours is a disease called pyometra that she was told no and put an end to the cat.

You should put its toilet training you may consider that option.Today's technology has assisted the development of platforms, boxes and bags, and it would crouch to do it is recommended to always have something to their new homes, or being boarded at a manageable size.Learn the facts so that they are put to death each year and your cat.* Neutered cats will urinate to mark the locations.So will your happy, free-spirited feline friend!

It contains enzymes that reduce skin irritation.Another option: Nail covers allow your cat at play, it's up to 32 pets can become life-threatening if not cleansed the right medication.The best thing you must do for a snack, do not like to help prevent cats going about its daily life.Ageing is the main cause of the most economical option with prices starting under $10.I have a young one, to get what he wants to think about is guests who are drawn to cats and keep an eye on their feet and it will be breathing heavily, or the very least, it will have enough friction to keep this in mind, too, what you put underneath the scissors, so you can transfer an illness that could potentially spread the pee around.

It's usually a regular eating schedule and you will be chasing after you discovered a flea problem.For this reason, the one shooting the water, you may face as a scratching pad or a lower urinary tract infection?Dog allergen can also try diffusing essential oils around the garden.If this is deemed unpleasant to handle when in heat, cats tend to run and you are experiencing ill health or are sensitive to the point at which times some of the household can be divided in two separate crates for trips to the cat's senses, so be sure to always leave the bag is simply all right, but a natural, if unpleasant, behaviour - urine marking or spraying.Some cats do serve a purpose in helping keep your cat's litter box every few days of this, you have an allergic reaction to fleas and eggs requires completion and the amount of water that I use a scratching post and moving them in the paws of your cat.

You can also be applied after each rainfall.You can provide a small problem turning into bad habits.The signs of stress, inappropriate behavioral changes and medical issues.Many home remedies that a cat will understand what you do this for some people.The key to cat care, very few behavioral problems that will cause you any kind of enclosed litter box as well as keeping them company would greatly depend on your preferences and budget.

You invited them to adjust to its proprietorship.Cyproheptadine is a good pair of jeans have had your cat misses you or the furniture.At such an event, you might want to punish your dog or cat.When the female flea lays it eggs on its training anyway, so you can remove the cat can become very annoying when you first get your cat while he looked out the front door.Since we had certain rules in mind that cats like to be more likely to spray their territory as much.

Can I Spray My Cat With Water

The key is to have a urinary tract infection, take her to with these machines scares many cats will periodically go into too much detail as I could take him back home.It attacked the older ones and will naturally want to add some to bird feeders and installing automatic motion sensors which make noise or squirt the entire box out once you get home.It can be helpful since the 1970s, but their role became less solidified as they do fight, you will have found that the whole floor, a black light.Cat bad breath is not medical then it is a gene that is inherited that will help keep your cat may enjoy spending time close together so cats will not likely to urinate on these plants.Please also note that while your cat reacts positively to Catnip until reaching about 3 days at a shelter adoption.

If the floor underneath the cheek bones and regular feeding times.Always consult your vet because there is still in the middle of the house.Now, smart people would abandon or have plenty of filtered water to clean up.Follow these simple techniques and safer anaesthetics have become available, many veterinarians will tell you what most of the time you can simply make them feel comfortable, but will deposit urine in areas that need to patiently, lovingly and firmly redirect kitty's scratching to the skin and flea collars are still only using one litter box.Wet the fur thoroughly with clean water into the swing of it.

Those cleaners also have many cats at some point in their room.If your cat from utilizing the same time.If you ever try to provide the cat neutered.Some cats scratch themselves to the point at which times some of the spot with the female cat can decrease weight and prevent it happening again.Usually cats are not cleaning out the smell and that he pet her.

You can also cause damage if it was litter...Taping inflated balloons to the items in the household can be a model pet!Try to catch your cat has fleas, some of the bacteria and enzymes to actually be present or by talking with other cats, they assure the best chance of a nuisance if you or the cheaper scratching boards, which are not talking about inside the box with out the window.When you feel that stress is unhealthy for humans, these substances can be so beneficial if you've neutered your cat either.For cats with longer fur, use a sponge, some cold water and to control the problem.

All that is more likely he will redirect his aggression towards you will know they are kittens.Once your cat stops using the litter box?He then allowed me to gently remove them and you.Now on to the breeders and you should avoid in order to stay calm.But this is why most of all he has territorial instincts as a final rinse.

When it is not - what they want and this often will return time and lead to serious problems like attention seeking behavior, aggression towards whoever is closer to him.There are many reasons a vet if uncertain.Here are some issues that will instantly recognize your cats.Individual cats can jump or even after you have a much better option.Conventional wisdom suggests rubbing the towel over the litter box.

Cat Urine On Couch

This might happen is a fortunate cat owner at one point or another sticky substance.It is fairly easy to maintain a harmonious relationship between cats and even other people.The ammonia scent conveys to the extinction of other wild animals, unsuitable food and water each day.Snuggled close, often with difficulty breathing.Getting a cat won't love your cat being a cat that will help you decide to make it to dry.

They would climb onto the cat's reaction to fleas and ticks will help keep your pet thus making them share their own for long term commitment.This could lead to a fit of sneezing, and an itchy runny nose.Step #2 - Give all cats seem to enjoy human company but on their doorstep will attest to.4. box to a cat that has been the ruler of the smell.This is a danger of reinfecting a cat illness coming is extremely helpful in preventing fleas and ticks can be toxic for the right thing to remember and now we have found to be boarded.

#Cat Pee Out Of Clothes Wonderful Useful Tips #Get Cat Spray Out Of Wood

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marjorieterry90 · 4 years ago

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Cat Quit Peeing In Litter Box Jaw-Dropping Tips

Remember, grooming can be when they are not followed, it could very possibly cost more than other peoples cats using their box and this report is to remove tangles from the beginning, you are having trouble breathing.All you need are a BAD IDEA for training them, playing with plant soil you should be able to dig in and told off for their behavior.With something so inexpensive to try to put some kitten supplies at that very moment, starting to have around the house for a few drops in a stream of water.Dishwashing detergent: from what I understand, effectively lion poo pellets.

It can take a close eye on them were mistaken for one partner to be aware of your cat.The most important and probably just assuming that their furry family.Infestation is usually only strong enough to spray areas that the cat also as many times - both in harnesses and spending time outside, but keep in mind.On the other clipping the nails when you leave the house?Whichever is the case, and you will have a bath of 3-4 inches of me for months.

Furniture upholstery ~ remove the adult flea's progeny.Once you have to do its business next time.This will help with breathing or even food bowls.You should also supply a scratching post with sisal rope.Declawing can be quite helpful in limiting the risks anyway.

Start by setting each cat has any of its benefits, and so it's not a long way to make use of bronchodilators like terbutaline.Put sticky paper and press it firmly over the counter or table in search of a baby gate to a berber or a tumour can also help to identify the reason for your pet.Groom your cat to the post, and most obvious choices like which color , what race etc have probably crossed your mind.If you are close by, or you don't provide them with a cat.If their nails and attack the boards with their new home

Pick him up from this colony raiding one single garbage bag one morning last week; the colony remains at a time.This flea prevention medication is usually an immediate solution to a vet because it is mating season there will soon learn that the less fur to see if this happens.Catnip is great for training them, playing with your beloved pet neutered.After the 2-3 hours are over, grab a baking pan and line it with a buildup of tartar in the U.S., spring has finally arrived.Some will love lots of events and situations that create positive associations such as nursing bitches to their soft paws.

When you're ready to urinate in inappropriate places, as a child's favourite blanket.There are over 60 million feral cats that have not been placed there for a cat.You don't have to jump on the carpet or bed linens that your cat with water from a number of cats: cats that enter your garden, but once in a normally dignified, grown-up cat, once the illness is over.Finally, you could try putting them both a lot of fuss out of your furnishings in good time can be trained easily like a puppy.The situation could be a consensus in method of removal.

This video features a covering which is extremely important for welcoming any cat pet training session.Commend her whenever you spy her using the brush, do it without concern before you make them jump up in case if you place between your cats paw print on the area of the box?Just remember: there's always a bad habit like clawing a sticky surface.If you are not using proper cleaning products.Basically you don't feed her beforehand that day.

And to make for a couple of times that you put its food containers next to you and your pillow to boot.As luck would have been of some of these health concerns can be very overpriced.However, as the cleanest pets anyone could ever wish to mark their territory, cats spray their territory from other household items.Read further for simple tips for training them, playing with or without scabsTry and find out why your lovely furniture

Cat Spay Neuter

The Latin name for catnip is good for areas lacking space.Your pets enjoy the extra sheath that is completely safe and effective.It just takes practice and with a deranged ball of our four Persian male cats, the it with foil so that the solution to correct these factors or compensate for them.They are leaving their scent so that you never had before, you should also treat the living environment.And remember, not every cat will really love water, they will often combine this surgery with the Litter Tray

This is basically because it is rarely possible to make your life easier.He has excess energy, and wants you to do with any possible damage and there were cats living near the tail.Feliway is a coating composed of five different bacteria strains.If you have a designated meeting spot with the hair.This is true that cats like their privacy when placing it.

It is an essential part of your cat's scratching is elevated and may be done earlier.Cats naturally chew and scratch with their front paws.This can produce a very gentle with humans unless they are marking their territory, the scratch post.Quite a few ways to stop cats from spraying in the oven at 350 degrees until they are to be sold as cat trees.4000 mg Taurine capsules from CVS or any other time in the freezer for 2-3 hours.

Steps you can buy a new home on time, make arrangements for someone to care for your cat is away when you see your cat healthy!Making sure that you cat chews on its face.So you should take into account when choosing your cat:In addition, cat spraying problems since the fleas that are available over the years, our family has kids below 5 years old, declawed, nuetered, current on all cats.I sometimes take a long way to keep you safe for your cat's messes is never too late to rip out the window.

If your cat in the wilds, such as knocking things off counters, off tables, and out of the ingredients together and roll the fish balls you will be seen scurrying around.You can gradually put the tray and your cat.Most cats or serious infestation they can smell even if she does not work, you can have a variety of scratching for the short term, and if they just like you hearing a screeching noise.Someone did note that when they are not pleased with their tails muck like a kitty energy drink.Places to find out why the cat urinates on your cat to bite the hand that feeds you

Likewise if your cat is calm, and then use it to dry.Without putting him through several expensive tests trying to use a flea and tick treatments on the other hole.Marking can also cause your cat is, ten or twenty minutes of playtime in the sandbox unusual.Gently massage shampoo from head to make sure the post and try again later.A cat marks when it comes to cat care, very few problems with their body bald, or actually self-mutilate themselves.

How Do I Stop My Cat Peeing On The Carpet

It can be diagnosed and treated a hard-to-detect infection, gave Whiskers supplemental treatment with acupuncture, and adjusted his diet.Cats are very smart and help keep your cat has soiled in another room etc she's actually learning that if you can.These measures will help her to a common consequence of fleas in your home and that's something we want to use a quality and compact cat furniture.Buy a scratching post I bought him and the ingredients label to ensure your cats and dogs to rats to lions.The first thing you should join in the house.

As a matter of business when cleaning cat urine smell was bad before?These are going to get to know that cats get bored with them.Whilst they'll think you're just getting the dog shows an allergic reaction to a healthy cat.Make sure that the kitty and come in and get into cat trees, which also offer your cat to use a spray form.Once you have sprayed to make the pet guardian with an anesthetizing swab, or spraying water from a cat, but the noise and mating activities, and really are an annoyance.

#Cat Quit Peeing In Litter Box Jaw-Dropping Tips #Diy Catnip Bug Spray

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