#the team has the opportunity to do the funniest fucking thing

[catravandece]

arcane could end in a dramatic way or, better yet, it could end with vi hanging out at caitlyn's house with the piltover crew havin tea or smth and makes one of her offhanded quips about how she hasn't spent time in a place this fancy since she blew up some nerds apartment in her teens and theyre all like "hahaha. wait what" smash cut to the credits

[oh-no-its-bird]

Special edition Christmas fic where genin aged team 7 decide hatch their newest plot to see Kakashi's face: using mistletoe

Because if they trap him under it with someone, he'll surely have to take his mask off to give them a kiss! ...Right?

(Sasuke thinks this is fucking stupid)

The entire thing is just a fucking slapstick comedy as Kakashi goes "what's the funniest way I can go along with this." And decides he will in fact lower his mask and give a kiss to everyone the kids corner him with. But only when they look away / blink / their view is obstructed

The kids are chasing him around with a string on a stick w mistletoe tied to the end of it, and every time they miss seeing the kiss (and his face) hey scream even louder

Reactions range from "???!?????!?!??????" (Iruka) to straight up passing out (Gai) to laughing hysterically with a bright red face (Kurenai) to just sort of freezing up like a deer in headlights (Asuma)

Kakashi, having way too much fun, makes a shadow clone to pull the Sukea thing again. And the kids get "Sukea" on board, thinking he can take a photo the second Kakashi pulls his mask down for a smooch. Kakashi has WAY too much fun, essentially role-playing with himself and swooning dramatically. Then, at the end, Sukea goes, "Oh no the camera's memory card is gone, Kakashi must have stolen it :((" and the kids all scream in agony

They try to get him to describe Kakashi's face and Sukea gets all coy and goes "umm... its kind of... indescribable?"

(They get another person to try to snap a photo of him but they turn out to be a freezer so they don't take the picture. When the kids harass them ab it they just giggle a little maniacally ab his face)

This does escalate to doing this shit w enemy nin btw. Funniest option is obviously Tobi but I'm also raising u a really freaked the fuck out Itachi looking like an angry, surprised cat after Kakashi gives him a peck on the cheek (Sasuke is gonna fucking KILL HIMSELF)

Obito gets the full makeout session bc its funniest.

He shows up looking for a dramatic fight but like halfway through his villain speech, team 7 dangles the mistletoe over him, and he's so thrown off guard he just kinda "???? excuse me I'm kind of in the middle of—"

Kakashi, who is a) in too deep to stop the bit now, and b) recognizes a good way to throw off an enemy, fucking launches himself at him, pushes Tobi's mask up just enough to kiss, and starts to make out w him

His back is turned to the kids and they're all scrambling to try to catch a single glimpse, but he keeps his back to them as they scream and run around (thus prolonging the kiss)

Kakashi is totally checked out of the actual kiss, this is all fun and games to him. Obito is having a fucking religious experience wrapped in a manic episode flavored internal breakdown topped off with a very loud high pitched kettle noise that may or may not be confined to his brain

This lasts for like a solid minute before Kakashi releases him and readjust his mask, pats him on the shoulder and goes "sorry about that teehee"

Obito just kinda 🧍‍♀️ and they stare at eachother for another solid minute as team 7 screams and cries and throws up in the bg

Kakashi, seeing the opportunity to leave and avoid what was for sure going to be a potentially devistating fight: "cool. So, anyways. Bye lmao." And runs for it w his students

Obito is left tanding still as a statue in the middle of the clearing. After like 20 seconds alone he starts hyperventilating.

Merry Christmas everybody 👍

[dvrcos]

more mic’d up andrew minyard when?? mic’d up AARON minyard when?? other mic’d up fox when??

Aaron Minyard Mic’d up

Hes reluctant to do it for a long fucking time

He thinks its kinda dumb

But he mostly doesn’t wanna get scolded for what his mic would pick up

Because my boy is a shit talker

He’s saying everything and anything he can to rile up the other team

He’s even trying to rile up the other foxes tbh

So when he finally agrees he makes coach promise he won’t get in trouble

He body slams the opposing striker (because if there’s one thing Aaron’s gonna do it’s put his all into a body check)

And the opposing striker is mad like visibly fuming

He’s all up in Aaron’s space, a moment away from starting a fight

And Aaron thinks it’s the funniest thing ever

He’s laughing his ass off while loudly crashing their raquets against each other

‘What you’re upset I hit you? I’m five foot nothing dude sounds like a you problem’

And he’s lucky the striker gets pulled away by his teammates cause he’s over 6 foot

And Aaron is all bark, no bite

*whispering into the mic as he walks away* ‘I’ll be honest guys, he would’ve kicked my ass but that was to good of an opportunity to pass up’

His best moments come from when he trips up a striker

*sends the striker sprawling onto their ass* ‘womp womp’

*body slams one into the wall* ‘maybe next time man’

*slams the ball out of their racquet* ‘that’s not yours cmon now’

He flirts with the opposing team but in German

Because he’s discovered that when they can’t understand what he’s saying it really gets to them

And he’ll slip in a word in English so they figure out he’s flirting

And they’re even more pissed and distracted that they mess up what would’ve been a solid play

‘What the fuck did you just say to me!?’

‘Hey, hey sorry just trying to have a nice conversation’ *winks and walks away to start up play again*

*Opposing striker, absolutely baffled and fuming*

His striker accidentally trips him up and gets past to Andrew

And Aaron doesn’t even have to look at Andrew to see the heavy bored expression he’s giving him

Aaron knows he’s probably plotting where to hide his body if he does it again

*Andrew, shaking his head in disappointment as he smacks the ball away*

*Aaron rolling onto his knees and pleading for mercy while laughing* ‘my bad, let’s just talk this out I promise it won’t happen again it was Nicky’s fault’

This happens a lot whenever they’re both on the court

Because making a joke out of Exy is one of the only ways they both actually enjoy it sometimes

And it’s something they can actually bond over

But oh god forbid if someone on the other team says something about Andrew

That’s when Aaron just looses it

Doesn’t matter if the player is ten times his size, he becomes all bite

‘Put your psycho pet brother on a leash already’

And Aaron’s helmets already off and he’s going for his gloves next

*Matt grabbing him and holding him back* ‘cmon Matt it’ll be good, he asked for it, it’ll be good’

‘No Aaron, no red cards’

‘But it’ll be fun’ *tries to throw his helmet at the other player*

He gets a yellow card for it but he proudly displays it by tucking it into the front of his jersey

‘I’m gonna frame this one coach’ he tells Wymack as he sits on the bench for his penalty

Kevin’s always the most annoyed by Aaron’s shit talking because it threatens the game and Aaron’s wellbeing

And he also gets the most riled up whenever Aaron’s turns it onto him

*Kevin storming over to Aaron after he almost gets ejected* ‘Stop saying shit that’ll get you kicked out of the game you idiot’

‘Oh cmon Day I know you like em a little feisty, I’m just trying to make you happy my Queen,’

And Kevin just smacks the top of his helmet and turns to walk away

‘I can get on my knees to apologize if you want, I know you like me on my knees’

And Kevin just has to tune him out cause Aaron won’t stop if he feeds into it

He gets really into the game sometimes though (because he’s competitive and he can’t help it)

Like he’s screaming and cheering so loud at certain points the mic is crackling

*Kevin and Neil scoring the goal that pulls them into the lead* ‘LETS FUCKING GO’

When he’s on the bench he’s the one banging on the plexi glass

He’s screaming at them to get their heads out of their asses or cheering them on even though they can’t hear him

And then he gets out of his competitive streak and he’s lowkey embarrassed

‘If that gets posted online I will never recover’ he mutters after he’s just jumped into Matt’s arms in celebration

When the foxes listen to his recording later they’re shocked by how creative Aaron gets with all of it

And they find it hilarious

And endearing

And they like that they’re getting to see a new part of Aaron as he gets more comfortable with the team

He is by far one of the most aggressive of the foxes when he’s on the court, both physically and verbally

And the fans absolutely eat it the fuck up

But Wymack doesn’t mic him up often because he is lowkey a liability because of what he says

[andrewsleftarmband]

Foxes Walk Out Songs

Ive seen this done a couple times and wanted to do it myself!! Slight modern au cuz I’m too lazy to find period accurate songs.

Dan Wilds

The Greatest by Sia

I think she’d choose this one to sort of hype herself up, and hype her team.

The pre chorus repeat of “I won’t give up” is just so Dan to me and I think she’d agree.

Matt Boyd

My guy Matt is definitely charging into the court to the raucous melody of

Turn Down For What by DJ Snake and Lil Jon

My guy is picking the hypest song he can think of and he’s gonna get that crowd GOING

Renee Walker

Sunday Best by Surfaces

Idk I think Renee would want something upbeat and happy

This song is so Renee coded like “feeling blessed, never stressed” is definitely a sticker she’d have on her water bottle

Allison Reynolds

Allison is 100% picking a hot girl bop and a half

And that song is On My Mama by Victoria Monet

I think she’d pick this song obviously for the hot girl vibes but also as another fuck you to her parents. “They say she get it from her mama, imma say you fucking right”

Nicky Hemmick

Now Nicky is picking an iconic gay anthem to strut out to in the most flamboyant way he can

And that song is I’m Coming Out by Diana Ross

I think he’d find the literal interpretation funny, but also he’s definitely the type to shout from the rooftops that he’s gay and this is a way to do that

Aaron 100% rolled his eyes when nicky picked this one

Aaron Minyard

Okay here’s how this went (I read a fic where something similar happened I’m just changing the circumstances lol)

I think Aaron would just avoid choosing something for lack of caring

And I think Nicky would decide to choose for him

But when Nicky suggests Man in the Mirror by Michael Jackson, he almost immediately shuts the idea down

But then he sees a little quirk of andrews eyebrow betraying a hint of amusement

And he chooses Man in the Mirror

One could laugh at it, but one could also get depressed by looking too closely at “I’m asking him to change his ways”

But I’m choosing to laugh

Neil Josten

This one was hard, I went through a couple options before landing on what I think would be funniest while being something he might actually pick

I don’t think Neil would know what to pick so I think Andrew would just show him a bunch of songs until he picked one

And I think he would eventually land on Centuries by Fall Out Boy

For one thing Andrew def listens to the emo trinity

For another I think the song has Neil’s fuck you im going to win energy that he brings to the court

One could look more closely at Neil “I’m finally a real person” Josten picking a song saying “you will remember me”

I love it

Andrew Minyard

This was actually the hardest

Because I don’t think Andrew would actually care enough to participate

But I can also see him using it as an opportunity to be a little shit

So I think he’d look wymack directly in the eye and choose Crazy Train by Ozzy Osbourne

Just to watch him sigh and put a hand to his forehead in exasperation

And I think the rest of the team would find it funny

Anyways, lmk what you think or if I’m like way off the mark here.

[niobiumao3]

Okay but the TBB Team has the opportunity to do the funniest fucking thing possible and have Tech be recognized no less than a dozen times as he flails his way back to the others/Pabu/etc.

'Wait! You--you're Riot Racer Tech!!!!'

'...I suppose I am, yes.'

'Oh wow oh maker okay look if you just like, sign this, let me get a selfie, you can just, take anything you want I swear.'

'I can?'

'Yeah! Okay maybe not, you know, everything, but like, definitely all of this.'

'This arrangement sounds distinctly imbalanced in my favor but seeing as I'm in need of these things and short on resources I cannot bring myself to turn it down.'

'Fuck *yes* no one is going to *believe this*!'

And that's how Tech got a lot of random clothes and parts to make a new datapad while his face wound up all over holonet socialmedia despite him being dead.

[ticklish-n-stuff]

How Toman members react to you telling them you like being tickled

Manjiro Sano (Mikey)

“Ok” is literally all he says. 

You’re all like ???? That’s it???

But don’t let his disinterested face fool you

“Oi, c’mere for a sec”

Proceeds to poke and squeeze at your tickle spots while hugging you close

He’d definitely tickle you randomly throughout the day as a cheer me up bc who can resist that adorable laugh

But he’s also a ‘lil shit and will tickle you at the most inconvenient times lol

Might wreck you in the middle of a meeting bc he was bored-

Hanagaki Takemitchy

You might have to guide his hands yourself, bro is too shy to even touch you

But once he gets the hang of it hooo boy, becomes cockier than Mikey, and that’s saying a lot

Verbal teases 24/7 “Does it tickle here? What about here? Oh you must be loving this~”

Once it settles in what he’s doing, he’d get flustered by his own teasing lmaooo

Ken Ryuguji (Draken)

Be prepared to be met with the most evil, shit-eating grin imaginable

Momma Ken? Nahhh, he goes full tickle monster mode

Loves to chase you down and give you a false sense of security before striking

You can always tell when he’s about to wreck you, his expression gives it all away

“Run” BITCH GET TO IT!!!

Chifuyu Matsuno

Bro gets too fucking cocky, funni considering how much Baji wrecks him but shhhh

“Aww, so you like it when I do this?~”

An evil tease, will ghost his wiggly fingers over your tickle spots, whisper close enough to your ear causing goosebumps

He’d describe what he’ll do to you just to drive you wild in anticipation

“If you wanted it so bad, you should've just said so!~”

Mitsuya Takashi

Thinks it's actually the cutest thing ever

The sneakiest of lers!

Always landing a quick poke or squeeze when you’re focused or distracted

And lovesss to play dumb, that bastard

“Hmm? What’s got you so red?~”

As an older brother, ofc he knows for which spots to go for

Actual pro at cheer up tickles, so dont you dare be sad in his presence/j

Nahoya Kawata (Smiley)

RUN BITCH! RUNNNNN

He will strike when you least expect it

Loves hearing the initial shriek of surprise every time

He's the eldest of the twins so of course he’s got all the tickle techniques down to a t

Try to tickle him back, I dare you. Bro will actually kill you lol

Souya Kawata (Angry)

He’s used to being Smiley’s victim, bro has no idea how to ler

So who better to learn from than Smiley himself

Be prepared for the tag team of a lifetime

Angry on his own is very gentle but can and will hold you down securely

Hakkai Shiba

As the youngest sibling in his household, this is a golden once in a blue moon opportunity to FINALLY be the one doing the tickling

Boy is so excited yet so nervous, please help him

He might seem scary but he's just a big floofy dog, gives the most playful/gentlest tickles while scooping you onto his lap cause t a l l

Will ask like every 5 secs if you’re having fun, he values your comfort greatly uwu

Baji Keisuke

Literally just die right there and then

Bro will show 0 mercy

Will tease you in private or public, he doesn’t care how much you whine about it.

Will laugh along with you bc your reactions are the funniest shit to him

Can easily pin you down and make you squirm like a worm

Being tickled by Baji is a workout in it’s own, and a death sentence

Kazutora Hanemiya

Adding Kazutora bc I can

Loves sneaking up on you and wrapping his arms around your waist

Will rest his chin on your shoulder or top of head while his fingers aimlessly worm around your whole torso

Bro can have the most chill expression ever and will suddenly feel like tickling you bc he can and he will

Or he will be a fucking asshole and make you ask for it lmaooo

"What's that t-word nonesense?? C'mon, it's not that hard~"

[jihopesjoint]

I’m sorry if someone has already asked you this but I just discovered your blog and I have to know what your headcannons are of BTS while high

anon… NO ONE has asked me this yet!!!! and you have my whole entire heart for taking one for the team and doing god’s work. i have treated this ask with the utmost importance and i only hope that i don’t disappoint you. also i'm sorry this took me literally all day LMFAO let me just open this with a blanket statement: the sheer number of bangtan giggles that there would be. i think i would die. anyway. onwards and upwards

namjoon

tbh my boy namjoon already speaks like he is stoned. he is ALWAYS waxing poetic and having an existential crisis, and that would increase tenfold if found holding a blunt. he’s making connections, he’s drawing conclusions. the empty chip bag that he has just devoured is definitely a metaphor for fame and how people take everything they love from you and then there’s nothing left for yourself. he’d sit on that for about five minutes before feeling guilty for thinking such thoughts about HIS army, who always refills his metaphorical chip bag.

seokjin

think of the windshield wiper laughs. OH he would be making the stupidest jokes (yes more than he already does). he gets great pleasure from jokes that make people groan. in seeming direct contrast, our gamer guy would be absolutely COUCHLOCKED. but he’d find that for some reason he just isn’t as angry at failures/deaths as he would be sober. and he thinks, “is THIS peace? have i never known it before this moment?” he didn't think he could get any more go with the flow than he already was. but if you think he’s not paying attention to the room around him, think again. he's making fun of everyone else losing their minds, all with eyes glued to the screen.

yoongi

oh bro. yoongi? he’s already an encyclopedia of useless knowledge, sprinkled with existential dread and hatred of the system. my man is ranting and RAVING about the capitalist machine. he doesn't understand why people have to work themselves to death to survive with no opportunity to enjoy life. he's pissed about the fact that he now benefits so greatly from a system he initially set out to be publicly against. and then he'll go on for 15 minutes about stucco, no transition. he's also hearing the most mundane sounds and recording them on his phone because they'll be perfect samples for a track. and then when he listens back to them the next day, he'll be like "what the absolute fuck was this?"

hobi

hobi for the first 20 minutes of the high is a silent observer. it's a little overwhelming right at the beginning, so he's probably a little in his head. he's just taking everything in. but after he crests the peak, he is loosey goosey. music has never made him want to dance more, and he didn't know that was possible. our boy's taste in music is made for getting stoned to. he's wiggling over to the snacks, wiggling with the snacks in his hand. falling to the floor, shouting with laughter when he sees how absolutely ZOOTED his members are. after he wipes the tears from his eyes, he sees yoongi sampling the sound of the ice maker and immediately goes over to be his ultimate hype man.

jimin

park jimin. my sweet baby. he knows that mama didn’t raise no bitch, so he’s taken extra hits after everyone’s tapped out. his eyes are basically permanently shut. for the life of him he cannot stop giggling. he’s in that every single thing that happens is funny mode. can’t hold himself upright. we’re talking hands on shoulders, we’re talking heads in laps, we’re talking falling to the floor. kim taehyung is the funniest person to exist in his eyes (yes more than normal). usually he cringes at himself speaking affectionately about his members, but all inhibitions are gone. he loves them SO MUCH, and he’s absolutely not going to shut up about it. he’s making grandiose plans for them to never get around to doing together because they’re not actually reasonable.

taehyung

taehyung is also thinking thoughts, putting things together. we're talking about the brain that brought us borahae. of course, for one good realization, you have to have about one hundred terrible ones. think of the highest thought you've ever had, or have ever heard someone else have, and you might have stepped inside the anomaly that is kim taehyung's head. some shit like, "what if birds aren't singing and they're actually screaming because they're afraid of heights?" and of course, jimin is fully ready to take this thought that he accidentally vocalized, turn it into a bit, and beat it into the ground. legend has it they're still figuring this out.

jungkook

on his most productive day, our maknae is operating as head empty, no thoughts. so there's no doubt in my mind that he's staring at the wall. not a damn thing is happening up there, i promise you. he's just realized AGAIN that he has hands, but he has no idea what to do with them. because he's completely unaware of what's going on in the room around him, he's interrupted taehyung and jimin's bit to ask them what he should do about his hand predicament. but while he was trying to get their attention, his hand brushed over one of the blankets on the couch and goddamn is it not the softest thing he's ever felt. so his focus has shifted entirely to feeling this blanket. rinse and repeat.

[f0point5]

Seeing all the discussion about Lando and Oscar, with Lando renewing, makes me a bit sad and apprehensive. I like Lando's dry humor and his forthrightness, and he is very talented (and I'm a giant fan of Oscar that kid is gutsy, together, and quietly hilarious). But I don't think Lando (or Charles or George) will ever challenge for WDC titles while Max is still racing. They got unlucky, racing while he was. But honestly, I'd be ecstatic for Lando to win just 1 GP, and continue to do podium and top 10 finishes for the rest of his career, and I hope he can make his peace with that because let's be real, that's the best outcome he's looking at right now. And then he'll either be pushed out by Oscar or he'll retire of his own accord.

I think Oscar has both the mental component and the good luck of being born later, coming into F1 later. He'll probably be competing for WDC after Max leaves the sport (early or if he doesn't renew after 2028, which seems to be what everyone thinks is going to happen).

And who knows what will happen with the new regulations. Red Bull could suck and the progress McLaren has made could be gone in an instant

It’s just the way, isn’t it. Because of how the sport is with its eras of dominance, so few drivers ever get the chance to challenge for a championship. And in between eras you have have maybe one or two years of opportunity where the Dominant team’s efficiency is declining, like Jenson had, or like Max had. But then when you’re up against a driver like Max, those one or two years basically don’t exist because he will not get off the neck of the car or the team. The year he loses will be because the car is simply fucked. If it has a half decent chance, he will win. So yeah, I think this generation is a bit cooked. But it’s happened to countless drivers before.

I think Lando would easily make peace with being a consistent podium finisher, I suspect he has already made peace with it, or at least thought about it being a reality, when he looks at the current and future grid. I think it will be many years before he is pushed out of the sport, maybe not so many before he is pushed out of McLaren…people say I’m crazy for saying that but we don’t know how long the contract is. I’m presuming there’s some contingencies in there in case the 2026 concept is a dud. For me, I see Oscar becoming the number 1 at McLaren by 2026. But I think if and when that happens, lando may have options. I think Lando at Merc would be a really good option, if and when George does a Danny.

But yes, I definitely think there will be some fireworks to come at McLaren.

Oscar will definitely be in the mix for the next era…I don’t know if I see it being with McLaren if I am honest. I could really see Oscar at Red Bull, especially if they haven’t found the next golden goose by 2028 (I am praying for the funniest thing ever to happen and Kimi Antonelli to be the one but if anyone gets him it will probably be Ferrari). I just don’t see McLaren bringing a dominant car, but I could be wrong. But either way I think Oscar will definitely be up in the front for a while.

[seeyouonsaturn]

Oh hell yeah these two have such a fun dynamic

@iholli

I headcanon that Darkwing isn’t very well-liked by the general population of high society cogged bots/the bots he spends time around. Sure, he’s a popular contender in the Iacon 5000 because of his skill, nobody is denying that he's fast and powerful, but personality wise, anyone that’s spent longer than a couple of minutes around him realizes he’s not actually that great to hang out with. Why do you think he’s in the mines?

My boss at my former workplace was like that. It was sort of an open secret that the reason he kept getting promoted until he wound up the warehouse supervisor was because nobody wanted him on their team, so they kept giving him new jobs to get rid of him. That’s how Darkwing got his supervisor job. Let the miners deal with his ass.

Skyline knows him long before ever meeting D-16 and Orion. The only reason he’s not on the High Guard himself is because their commander said Absolutely Not, otherwise I just know Mr. Power Trip Who Thinks He’s Hot Shit wanted to be on the team. I like to think him and Skyline formally met during tryouts - she got the position, he did not. And he's always going to be a bit bitter about that. Skyline is far younger than him, inexperienced and a bit reckless. Sure, she's talented, but so is he. Darkwing took that personally.

Even so, they keep having to deal with each other at events because he is a pretty high standing bot, and even outside of the one-sided rivalry, Skyline does not vibe with him at all.  When she finds out he’s D-16 and Orion’s supervisor, the first thing she does is give her condolences.

Now to the fun part though: Skyline outranks him. He has to do what she tells him, whether he likes it or not. She’s saved the boys’ butts on more than one occasion by giving some excuse about having “borrowed them for some task” to explain why they didn’t show up for work or something similar. It pisses Darkwing off to no end, because the lack of labor reflects badly on him, but there’s nothing he can actually do about it beside complain. He can’t even punish them because their absence was sanctioned by the High Guard. And if he tries to anyway, they’ll tell her, and she’ll come tear him a new one. It’s definitely happened so many times that by some point he starts getting very suspicious, and Skyline keeps asking the boys to stop using her as a get out of jail free card, but Orion is regrettably insane (affectionate) and could never waste this opportunity he’s been handed to do whatever the fuck he wants with no consequences.

Darkwing is so onto them. Nobody believes him though. He doesn’t have any proof, and a member of the High Guard being in cahoots with some miners is a ridiculous concept. No wonder he has it fucking out for those two guys in particular.

I don't really know much about Darkwing in other media to fully know what exactly happens post-movie canon, but considering he's usually a Decepticon, I'm imagining the beginnings of that to be the funniest conversation ever.

Skyline still outranks him, but it's worse now. She's officially conjunxed to the little miner (HE KNEW IT!!!) except, that's Megatron now, who is terrifying and also very much the boss of him, so what's he gonna do about it? He just has to live like this now.

Darkwing is not having a good time.

[that-soccer-guru]

Now I'm not saying it's going to happen or anything, but we all know that football is weird....

Portugal has the opportunity to do the funniest fucking thing in the world. We'd be moving into a Round of 16 without the reigning Olympic champ and the defending World Cup champ.

It's unlikely, but the World Cup Math dictates it is a small possibility.

Again, I'm sending nothing but great juju to every team, but my dislike for the sheer lackluster reign of Vlatko kinda has me rooting for this to happen if only to get him booted out with his shitty uncreative formations, poor sub management, and ugly senior team development and all.

[insertdragonpun]

⚠️⚠️WARNING⚠️⚠️

This post will cover dark topics such as sexual assault and murder. If either of these topics are triggering to you, please do not read them and please mute the tag "apocalyptic comic idea" since all of these posts will have similar topics. Take care of yourselves. If you want to read anyway, every time such topic pops up, it will be led and followed by danger triangles with a summary afterward.

This is for my monster apocalypse story currently in the works and, therefore, will have violent and gory segments. These are treated like the potential triggers and well have danger triangles but will not be summarized. I use this as practice for writing such things.

I swear a lot. I do not use slurs and never will use slurs. If I accidentally say one, please let me know immediately so I can change it. I never say anything harder than the f-bomb.

You have been warned.

⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️⚠️

Say hello to Ah-In Sangha! (The name being a little nod to my favorite monster apocalypse story orv)

Holy fuck I love her so much.

Her family moved to the city when she was very young in search of new opportunities and a kinder place for their little girl. She started dance classes when she was very young, taking to them like a duck to water. It was great exercise for her, and since the studio was on the outskirts of the city, she was able to get clean air to help her growth. (This city is polluted like crazy. If you read Magnus's/Ember's post, you know how bad it is)

Well, she gets a scholarship by winning a dance competition and ends up going to a good university. The very university she attends when the story begins. There was an audition for dancers for the up-and-coming Vee during Ah-In's sophomore year.

She auditions, gets in, and has been dancing with Vee every since. They aren't really close, but she is one of the two dancers that are permanent fixtures in the opera house turned studio. (The other dancer was at a doctors appointment during the tutorial, so he luckily missed the vampires.)

Vee still wears a little mask over her face when practicing with dance and crew (a little cat face that Ah-In thinks is the funniest thing ever) the only way the dancers can tell it's her is by her pink hair (oh? I mentioned color? Preposterous!) And her booty shorts with random words across the butt. (Seriously, where did she even get those?)

Well. One day (that fateful, damned by all day) when practicing Ah-In notices some of her juniors muttering about strange sounds coming from the stage. Upon noticing her dancers weren't fully paying attention to practice, Vee called for a break. Ah-In stretched and rubbed at her neck. She slept on it weird, and it was still kinked.

She looked around the room. There was a new guy on the management team who kept giving her the creeps. And liked to pop in and watch the dancers. She hadn't caught him doing anything weird except his lingering stares at some of the girls, but she was just waiting for him to overstep the line between weird and creep.

The low click of the power shutting off startled her from her thoughts. The junior dancers started chattering amongst themselves as Vee looked around. Ah-In set down her water bottle and walked towards the stage door. She was a few feet away when it was slammed open by one of the crew ⚠️⚠️ (danger triangles!) Their arm was limp at their side. Bent at an unnatural angle. Was there bone sticking out? She couldn't tell and didn't want to know. Two of their fingers were missing as thick red dripped onto the floor.(danger triangles!) ⚠️⚠️

Lucas, the newest dancer in the group, jumped forward in front of Ah-In, which was sweet but not needed, as the crew member spoke.

"Run."

They fell into the puddle from their fingers. Still and cooling as something crept closer from the dark doorway.

"Lucas, step back." Was all Ah-In could say before the creature in the dark pounced at the man and began ripping.

She stepped back in shock.

"Everyone! Run!" She shouted as she ran. More creatures poured through the door, latching onto whoever was closest. She flinched when she heard their screams. She pushed the remaining dancers through the opposite door like a dog herding sheep trying to get them to safety. Once the last one was out, she felt eyes on her.

She was barely able to turn around to be face to face with the creature. The face was human, yet not. It had no flush of life, no creases gained through the years. Just cool and smooth like porcelain.

She fell on her back with the creature above her, holding her down. One hand on each wrist, it was insanely strong as it leaned down. But it wasn't too smart. She still had her legs free. She reached a leg under its stomach only to stop and cry out in pain as she felt something burning on her neck. She pushed her leg against the creature's stomach, sending it flying and yanking her up with it. She felt something scraping against her neck as it went flying into the hoard of vampires (she really couldn't deny it now after it bit her.) Crashing into a few, and getting caught in a swarm as it disappeared in the group.

With one hand on her neck, she fled through the door, slamming it behind her.

The only sound she could hear was the muffled movement behind the door as she crept further into the dark hallway. She kept moving carefully and quietly so as to not alert any other monsters that could be lurking in the dark. She kept going until she heard a scream coming from around the corner.

She ran in to see ⚠️⚠️(danger triangles!) Vee sitting on the ground back against the couch in her rest room. Those goofy shorts were pulled down around her thighs with her underwear crooked. The weak light from the window glinted off of the glass buried deep in the body was in front of her. That same bastard she was thinking about earlier laid cooling on the ground, his belt next to him as his pants were hung low and loose on his behind. (Danger triangles!)⚠️⚠️ (Ah-In found Vee half undressed with a body in front of her.)

A blue box popped up in front of Vee as she started to hiccup and sob.

"Hello? Vee? Vee!" Ah-In called as she moved the body to the side. It's best to get it out of her line of sight.

She sat down in front of her as the blue light reflected across the beady eyes of her mask. The cutesy smile barely muffled the sounds of her tears.

Ah-In reached forward in an attempt to comfort her, but she stopped short of her arms once she saw her flinch. Vee seemed to collapse upon herself, curling into a little ball. Ah-In tried to keep her movements easy to read for the singer. Like choreography.

"Vee, can you hear me? It's Ah-In." She couldn't help the tiny smile as Vee nodded. Her breathing was starting to steady, which was a blessing since Ah-In really didn't know any good breathing patterns that didn't involve physical contact, which was a big no at the moment.

"That's good. Do you-" she tried saying something else when another blue square appeared in from of Vee. She tried to read the backward words (description for the comic) but the screen disappeared before she could finish the first sentence.

"What the fu-" she was cut off once more by the blood-curdling scream, forcing itself through Vee's throat.

Oh shit. What should she do?? Vee was curled over again.⚠️⚠️(danger triangles!!) There were lumps(?) moving under her skin. Pushing against her flesh some poking through leaving little trails of blood running down her face and body. (Danger triangles!!)⚠️⚠️

Suddenly, the singer went limp. Fainting from the pain and falling into Ah-In's arms that were still hovering an inch away.

She moved carefully so as to not disturb Vee, reaching for a pillow to rest the singers head on as she watched in horror.

⚠️⚠️(danger triangles!!) Bones were peircing her skin as muscle and skin rapidly formed across them. Her head was bleeding as horns forced their way through her skull curling around her ears. The cat mask cracked and fell off. Her ears stretched into points as her spine extended into a tail. Ah-In was going to throw up. (Danger triangles!!)⚠️⚠️

Once the transformation was done, Vee started to wake up.

"Wha-what happened?" Her voice no longer muffled by the mask as Ah-In shivered from shock.

"I-i don't know."

Vee started to sit up before slipping, causing Ah-In to rush to her side, hands hovering once more unwilling to touch unless giving permission.

"Holy fuck my everything hurts." Vee whined out like she just finished an intense workout instead of undergoing a rapid and gruesome transformation.

Ah-In couldn't help but laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation.

"What's so fu-" Vee turned to face Ah-In, her eyes shining with something playful before fading as her eyes were drawn down.

Ah-In looked behind her to see the still cooling body.

"Oh shit," she twisted back to see Vee then back to the body before rushing to pull it through the door and into the hallway. The hall echoed with skittering steps and scratching that rushed towards her, slamming into the door as she closed it.

"That was-"

"A monster."

"No, the body it was-"

"A monster. Nothing more, nothing less. It lost the right to be human when it attacked you." Ah-In looked into Vee's eyes, something she was very much not used to, as she said that last bit.

With a shuddering breath, the singer nodded as she carefully stood up. Getting used to the new appendages.

"We're trapped in here aren't we?"

"Yeah. I think so. Unless you want to risk it outside, though I have a feeling it isn't any better out there." Ah-In stated as she looked out the window. People were running around as... giant butterflies chased them?

Vee appeared over her shoulder, "Huh. Maybe it wouldn't be too bad out the-NEVERMIND." they both starred in horror as one of the giant bugs ⚠️⚠️(danger triangles!!) ripped through the throat of a young man like one would tear paper. (Danger triangles!!)⚠️⚠️

"Okay, so outside is no. The rest of the studio is no. I guess we just have to wait it out for a bit?" Ah-In slumped onto the couch rubbing at the burning feeling in her neck.

"Yeah, that sounds like a plan." Vee sat next to her. Her tail curling into her lap.

"Sooo. What did the screen say?"

"The first one congratulated me on passing the tutorial, and the second one called me a succubus."

"What the fuck."

Vee started giggling as tears began to run down her face, "I'm... well, I don't know what I'm going to do when I find whoever did this, but it isn't going to be pleasant."

Ah-In joined in her giggling. The two of them just sat on the couch, blood stains seeped through the floor, as they giggled. It wasn't even funny yet here they were. Laughing up a storm.

She didn't know how long they stayed there, but once she stood up, she felt dizzy as black splotches filled her vision.

"Woah! Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I think I just stood up too fast." She rubbed at her aching neck, surprised to see her hand come back red.

"You're bleeding! That is not okay! Sit down. I have a first aid kit around here somewhere." Vee pulled Ah-In back down to the couch as she stood up instead rushing around the room to find her kit.

Her tail(s?) flicked as she moved, twisting around each other as it flexed. It took only another minute before she came back with a large metal case in her hands.

"Okay. Where?"

Ah-In took her hand back off her neck and leaned closer to let Vee see the wound.

"Gross. Did one of them bite you?" She asked as she started wiping the blood away with an alcohol soaked pad.

"Yeah, but I kicked it off." Oh that stung like a motherfucker but no way in hell was she going to show it.

"I didn't really get a good look at them. What did they look like?" Once the wound was sufficiently cleaned, she started wrapping it with gauze.

"Uh. Kinda like dolls? They looked human but too perfect. No wrinkles or anything." Vee started rummaging through the first aid kit again.

"Creepy. Here are some iron pills. They help with blood flow. I think I have some water and something salty in the cupboards as well." Ah-In took the pills and swallowed them.

Ah-In squinted as her head began to ache, "Is it alright if I close the blinds?"

"Sure, do you feel like you need to lay down?" Vee returned with a water bottle and bag of chips in hand, handing them off to Ah-In.

"Yeah, but you can't be feeling much better." The moment her head hit the end of the couch, she conked out.

When she woke up she felt like death itself.

"That was the worst nap of my life." She sat up to see a shocked Vee holding what looked like a spear standing near the door.

"Ah-In?! Holy shit! It's been a week!"

"What?" She tried to stand, but her legs gave under her weight. Her vision started to fill with the black blotches again, her heartbeat pounding in her ears.

"Shit, hold on!" Ah-In couldn't see where Vee went, too focused on the tip-taping coming from her chest as her own heartbeat began to match it.

"Vee-"

"Here, water, iron, salt." She saw wrists show up under her head. Each vein throbbed along with her heart. She brought her eyes to look at what was in the hands. Yeah. That must be what her body wanted.

Downing the water, pills, and chips, she felt her vision clearing. A few moments later a blue screen popped up in front of her.

[Congratulations, player! You survived! Your body is a little different now. Make sure to keep up with your needs! You don't want to attack your allies, do you? :)

Welcome to the game: Ah-In the Vampire!]

Below it was a smaller blue box

[Achievement unlocked: Vegan vampire! Meet your needs without attacking another player.]

"Oh fuck."

Well. How do y'all like that? Ah-In didn't kill anything or anyone during the tutorial period (yes, it's a set amount of time. Those who survive but don't become players become npcs and are just normal people) but she did transform, so I had to give her a different system message. Now it's sleepy time goodnight!

[daegorth]

😭😭😭😭

Oh god, I'm honestly both thrilled that this is your response and a bit sorry that you have to see all my weird ass posts 💀💀💀

And yeah, craziest match I have seen in a while, I went through a rollercoaster of emotions🥲

Yes, EVERYTHING that could have happened happened:

We got scored on two minutes in but it was disallowed.

Messi goal from a Jordi assist (classic them, like it hasn't been two and a half years without playing together) before the tenth minute

We went 2 goals down TWICE, TWICE I TELL YOU!!!!

Our defence was scrambling all over the place, completely paper-thin and torn apart with a single pass too many times to count and too slow to catch up to the attacker. I cannot remember how many times Dallas ended up in a one on one against our goalkeeper but it was too goddamn many. 3-1

The instant a 18yo argentinian Miami player gets off the bench, he scores a banger and gives us a bit of hope. 2-3 Now we are only one down, maybe we still got this.

Nope. We don't got this. A couple of minutes later WE SCORE A FUCKING AWFUL OWN GOAL. JUST.... IT ROLLED IN SOO SLOWLY, HOW COULD YOU NOT REACH IT CALLENDER???? DON'T YOU KNOW THE WHOLE WORLD IS WATCHING YOU???

I sigh in disbelieving outrage, the match is done, we are 4-2 down with 10 minutes to go, there's absolutely no way we win this. I contemplate going to sleep because I have work in the morning.

I CANNOT. Messi has a free kick. It's in a weird position but I've seen him do weirder, so I have to stay. He crosses it instead of going for goal. Beautiful, wicked curve, pinpoint accuracy in front of the net, my heart is in my throat but I'm already feeling disappointment creeping in because nobody's there. EXCEPT!!!!! A FUCKING DALLAS PLAYER (GOD BLESS HIS CONFUSED, DEHYDRATED, GASSED SOUL) HAS A BRAINFART AND ENDS UP HEADING THE BALL INTO HIS OWN NET WITH THE FORCE OF A CANNON. I cannot comprehend wtf just happened. I can only assume that he just saw his only opportunity to get an assist from Messi and took it, because it looks so deliberate that I'm questioning if someone has called him at half time and set him up for life if he just did the funniest, most awful thing he could do. The look of despair on his face as soon as he realizes what he's done makes me start giggling like a lunatic.

I'm pumped but still sure we're going to lose. Except that Messi looks like he's smelling the next goal and every Miami player starts playing like their life depends on it.

We get a free kick. YESSSSS! Leo doesn't go for goal but tries a prepared play to Robert Taylor that doesn't work. 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭.

While in the middle of losing the ball and with it Miami's last chance of equalising, Taylor gets fouled outside of the area. OH GOD YEEEEESSSS!!!! It's in Messi's preferred side of the pitch. 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍.

It's the last minutes of the game. If it goes in it would be a third Messi brace in a row, his 7th goal in 4 matches, his 2nd free kick goal in the leagues Cup, it would literally be him dragging his team behind him as he claws his way out of a bad defeat.

The madman does it.

HOW??????? It's a beautiful, beautiful free kick, right into the corner. I tear up because this man cannot be real.

The match goes from 4-2 to 4-4 with 5 minutes to spare.

The final whistle blows and now I have to ready myself for a penalty shootout. I feel sick with excitement and anxiety because for some godforsaken reason I got so invested in this team that I'm giggling and trembling on my sofa, at 5.30 in the morning, watching a FUCKING MLS MATCH. How has this become my life????? (I know, I know, it's a cup game, not MLS, but it's the easiest way to express my absolute bafflement with wtf I'm doing)

I bite my nail as I watch Messi walk up to the spot. He has to do it. He cannot fuck this up. He cannot. (I'm having flashbacks to the pen he skied in 2016. The magnitude of the moment is hilariously dwarfed by that memory, but not even his absolute cold-blooded pens in the WC can make me less nervous).

He scores. GOD THANK YOU. I WOULD HAVE HAD TO HEAR SO MUCH BULLSHIT IF HE HADN'T DONE THAT. Thank whoever taught him how to take pens, seriously. They look so badass now.

They win 4-4 (5-3).

THEY WON???? HOW???? The last half hour feels like a fever dream. I unclench my jaw and flop back on the sofa. I stare unseeingly at the ceiling pondering my priorities and the bad choices I have made to end up here.

I scroll through reddit and laugh. Then I go to work.

Yeah.... I've had a nightTM.

Please behold. A collection:

This match was surreal, by the 60th minute I felt like I was on mushrooms, I had to bite my fist to stop myself from screaming or laughing hysterically because it was 5am and everybody was sleeping. By the time the match ended and my heart rate had slowed down enough that I wasn't on the edge of a heart attack it was 6.30 and I had to go to work lmao.

[technoblade-updates]

A continuation from this clip!

[Transcript Begins:

Phil: Like, fuck, dude. It doesn’t, like- doesn’t, like- I just- I- Ah, I dunno, dude. I dunno. I was- I was under the impression that Techno was also going to play but mans was just like “Nah, I’m good.” It’s, like “Fuck!” Like, we- oh! Like, we’ll probably be playing, uh, TF2 instead, I think. *Philza gremlin noise.* Is that good? ‘Cuz he loves TF2. I can’t see Techno getting too bored of TF2. Dude, the funni- the- he does the funniest fucking thing and I can call it almost every time when he’s about to do it. Alright, so when Techno plays TF2 mans doesn’t talk much in the VC, or rather, like, he talks to us, but he doesn’t in the game, right? Doesn’t talk in the game, like, at all. Not from fear of people finding out who he is; he just doesn’t want to speak to them. Unless he has killed enough people for the team to- for our team to push through and take the point, or rather, like, push the- the fucking package or whatever, right? So the moment he has wiped the team, ‘cuz he normally does, he’s pretty cracked. The moment he wipes the team or kills like 60 to 70% of them he’s just like *Phil pulls the mic close to him and speaks in a low voice* “Guys, they’re all dead. Push, push, push.” And I can call it every fucking time; I just look at the kill feed. Like, he’s not said a single thing to anyone in the game and then the moment- the moment he’s killed, like, a fucktonne of people he’s like *pulls mic close again* “Guys, get on the- push, guys, push, come on, team!” ‘Cuz he knows we need to push, he knows if we don’t fucking push it’s a wasted opportunity. He’s played so much! He’s played soooo much TF2! Eh, let’s do that, boosh, boosh, boosh, boosh, boosh, boosh!

Dono: too tired for funny sub message this time lol. speaking of email I took a week off from work. looking through 150+ emails now. Also, I worked on formatting Japanese German subtitles for original Dune for my job which was cool. anyway thanks for streams!

Phil: Oo! Yeah, no worries, mate! Oh, you know what, chat, we should just do this, like, old school. Boosh. Boosh. Boosh, hi mate. Bap! Oh, we got a go fishing redemption? Motherfucker, dude. Let me finish one flower at least, Jesus! Lemme finish the fucking flower, come one, dude. *reading chat* Is he a Soldier main? *Answering* Ah, the one with the rocket launcher? Yes. He’s just flying around the map.

Transcript Ends]

[wallflowerimagines]

Hi! I looove your posts! Thank you so much for sharing your writing!

I was wondering… could you maybe write about the Four Lords with a shy S/O that gets bold and defensive when someone insults the lords? or calls them names? And the Lord’s reaction to the S/O acting different? Dk if im explaining myself >.<

Again! Love your work! Have a great day!

We stan protective partners on this blog!!

Warnings: uh...insults? They're pretty over the top😅 Also swearing.

Alcina Dimitrescu

Honestly, Alcina is more than able to defend herself.

She's got a tongue like a viper, and the thickest skin imaginable. If you really want to hurt her feelings, you have to be someone whom she already respects to a certain degree, or she won't even be phased.

Still, when she leaves a room, there's always some idiot that thinks it's a smart idea to talk shit.

Maybe it's a maid, maybe it's a guest in the Castle, but either way you're not having it.

"God, you're annoying." There was a pause before they opened their mouth again, and you rolled your eyes. "No please, by all means, continue to share your lack of taste with the rest of us."

You disassemble this dumbass, starting small with comments about their personality (trying to keep it classy), but escalating the more they choose to double down on the comments.

Alcina comes back into the room to find you practically screaming at this asshole.

"Look, all you have accomplished here today is revealing that you are a fundamental disappointment on every possible level. My life is worse now that I've heard you open your mouth, you disrespectful, shit licking worm fucker."

Alcina is stunned. You do not give off "aggressive guard dog" vibes at all, yet here you are defending her tooth and nail. While she had seen brief moments of your inner strength and protective streak (mostly towards her daughters) she just...never thought you would do the same for her.

It's not because she doesn't trust you or love you! But nobody has ever done something like this for her before? Ever? She's never had anyone try to protect her--not physically, and not even verbally. She's been so independent for so long that it's... Strange to see you support her so openly.

She doesn't need you to do this for her, she doesn't even expect it, but you do it anyway for no other reason than the fact that you love her. You want people to give her the respect she deserves.

I'm going to be real here: Alcina has never been closer to swooning before in her life. You're overcoming your shyness because you believe in her so much-- it's not a gesture meant to be romantic, but Alcina can't help but see this as a massive statement of your commitment to her.

Seriously. This is such a massive thing for her that if proposals weren't already on her mind, she is mentally picking out a ring for you the minute this happens.

Then, of course, she glides into the room, kisses you until you're breathless and babbling, and smirks at the unfortunate peon who thought they could get away with insulting House Dimitrescu.

She's in such a good mood that she's considering going easy on the idiot. Maybe removing their tongue would be enough of a warning?

Donna Dimitrescu

You don't really know how it's possible but apparently some people don't like Donna Beneviento? Some people think she's scary and unpleasant????

Wild. Can't imagine what that's like.

The two of you are honestly the sweetest, most toothrottingly adorable couple-- blushing when you hold each other's hands, sneaking glances at each other across rooms, giving each other kisses and forgetting whatever was on your mind...

Honestly, anybody who's critical of your relationship with your girlfriend is just a hater. Fuckers can pound sand😤

Still, you are pretty shy, so it takes a lot for you to defend yourself if someone comments about you. It can take a lot of courage to stand up against rude remarks, and sometimes it's easier to walk away.

Defending Donna, on the other hand?

The minute someone even thinks about dismissing her, you are ready to throw hands.

"My lovely girlfriend already said no, meaning you're either deaf or too stupid to pick up on simple social cues," you purse your lips and give the rude and pushy Villager a patronizing once over. "You and your opinion are equally useless. Get the fuck away from us."

Donna blinks.

She... Was not expecting this??? At all?? You're so nice! You always tell her about your attempts to avoid confrontation! What's going on??? How did you get the guts to say what she's always wanted to say?

Meanwhile, Angie is LIVING.

The little doll chimes in to assist you with the verbal homicide, working as a tag team to absolutely murder this moron. She's half partner, half hype man, and is so excited to do this with you. Normally, she has to protect Donna all by herself, but she's relieved and reassured that you stepped in first.

'USELESS IS TOO NICE, THOUGH! THAT IMPLIES THEY AREN'T A POINTLESS, RANCID, LONELY FREAK. THEY LOOK LIKE THEY CRY WHEN THEY MASTURBATE.'

You high five Angie, still glaring daggers at the unfortunate villager.

The two of you continue to ream into the villager, while Donna hovers nearby.

As surprised as she is, she's also grateful. She's only really ever had Angie to help shield her from insults and disrespect (and occasionally inducing horrifying hallucinations that make people claw off their own skin), but having you in her corner makes her feel safe.

Not to get totally sappy, but you're like her knight in shining armor in a lot of ways. And the fact you two are so similar is really motivating-- She wants to one day be confident enough to return the favor. Until then, she's happy to watch her two favorite people have fun insulting some stranger ❤️

Salvatore Moreau

With you being so shy, Salvatore is surprised how often he takes the lead in your relationship.

He's not normally all that outgoing, but you seem to bring out a side of him that's very protective. Whenever you have a bad day he wants to bundle you up and keep you safe from the world.

If he so much as holds your hand you start stuttering and avert your gaze. It creates a feedback loop where you both get flustered, but Moreau has never felt steadier. Despite your shyness, you make sure he knows how much you love him.

You're sweet as pie and twice as kind--Salvatore is the luckiest man in the world, nobody can convince him otherwise 💕💕

So it comes as a total shock that when a passing fisherman spits in your path and calls him a freak, your entire demeanor does a 180.

Your posture straightens and you look the villager dead in the eye, "I don't believe anyone asked your opinion."

Salvatore: 😳

This is not the time, and he totally knows it, but, uh, something about your tone??? Really does it for him???

While he's attempting to process why exactly he's starting to short circuit, you proceed to verbally shred this person to bits with clinical efficiency-- nothing is off limits.

They might try to defend themselves, but it's useless. You do not let up.

"Ugly? Monster? Bitch your teeth are throwing gang signs, don't throw stones from your shining glass house."

You insult their appearance, what they're holding, their smell-- you get so fucking mean that you might even make them cry.

Moreau is just lost right now, trying hard to figure out how exactly you were able to gain all of this confidence so quickly.

He's not upset! In fact he's very flattered! But, he also doesn't want you to get into a fight with some unimportant stranger. (After all, if they so much as throw a punch, they're straight up dead. Moreau is a patient man, but he's not that patient. You do not hurt his partner and live to tell the tale.)

He may a healer but...

Eventually he steps between you and the fisherman in an attempt to deescalate the situation, but you just kiss him on the cheek and step around him, determined to make your point.

Blushing hard, Moreau lets you do what you want. What can he say? Fish man likes himself a protective partner 💞

Karl Heisenberg

Magnet Man is not the most social guy to begin with, so any opportunities you have to stick up for him are already pretty slim.

He mostly knows you as the shy, sweet, easily flustered partner that lets out a cute squeak every time he sneaks up to hug you from behind.

Karl's honestly happy just to spend time with you all alone in the Factory. It's not the best or healthiest mindset, but he'd be perfectly content to only ever see you for the rest of his life. Spending time with anybody else feels like a boring waste in comparison.

But occasionally, you do head out into town with him. Heisenberg wants you to be safe so he doesn't do it often, but running errands with you is a weakness of his. It's domestic in a way that he's never experienced before.

He likes it ❤️

What he does not like is the shopkeeper starting to give their opinions on the quality of your relationship with him.

Most insults Karl will let slide because he doesn't particularly care. However if anyone makes a comment on how scared (shy) you look around him, how you must be being threatened into being with him, how poorly Lord Heisenberg is treating you...he won't stand for it.

But before his fingers can even twitch towards his hammer, you snap.

"You're clearly the blindest cocksucker I've ever met--so wipe the cum out of eyes and mind your own fucking business."

Karl does a double take.

He's heard you curse before, but quietly. The words coming out of your mouth are WILD right now, he has NEVER seen you so angry. You're defending him with the aggression of a wild animal, and it's simultaneously HILARIOUS, but for some reason he's also getting a warm fuzzy feeling in his chest?

He doesn't need you to protect him like this, but seeing you blatantly argue how much you love and cherish him in public reassures him in a way he didn't know he needed.

Still, hearing you call the shopkeeper "shit for brains" is the funniest thing that's happened in years.

Heisenberg starts laughing, and the more you shout at the idiot, the harder he laughs. Is it weird how hard he wants to kiss you right now?

Eventually, he just has to drag you away, cackling as you continue to shout insults at the unfortunate shopkeep. There's got to be an alley around here for some good old fashioned privacy 💕

[fbfh]

ricky bowen dating hcs

If ricky really falls for you

Which he has at this point

Oh my god

Luckiest person in the world

Once this boy realizes how happy you make him

“I love you means you’re never ever getting rid of me” - ricky bowen probably

You’re always at each other’s places or out somewhere together

If you’re still in school you’ve gotten catching up between classes you don’t have together down to a science

He’s become a fucking professional at texting without getting caught

Whenever you feel your phone buzz in your pocket in class you know there will be at least a few texts that are going to make you laugh

Or blush

Or both

Whatever you’re into

Whatever hobbies or extracurriculars or things you’re passionate about and into

He’s now vicariously into them through you

You like a particular sport?

He blocks out whatever time the team you follow plays to watch with you every week

He’ll learn everything about it that he can but still have you teach him what’s going on cause you love talking about it and he loves when you share with him

He also loves how your eyes light up when he gets something right

“And Patterson’s the… linebacker?”

“Yes!!!!”

Ricky: :) <3

If you’re into more artsy stuff

So is he now

He could watch you sketch and paint for hours

Whether you’re drawing digitally or writing or editing videos or making music he’ll never get bored of watching your cute focused face while your eyes dart across the screen

If you’re rehearsing acting or dance or singing he’ll pick up little parts to duet with you

He’ll learn your favorite iconic dance (dirty dancing end scene i’m looking at you yes he would learn to do the lift and everything), a monologue from your favorite show/musical/movie/play, and your favorite song

He loves enjoying the things you love with you

It makes him so happy and feel so close to you

Whatever fandoms you’re in

Congratulations you now have someone to infodump to and share your favorite media with

He just loves seeing you do stuff you love

He is so affectionate

So goddamn affectionate

He will literally take any and all opportunities for kisses and cuddles

Even just casual touching

Your legs propped up on his lap while you’re watching a movie

Head on your shoulder during a very boring assembly

And a lot of hand holding

Like a whole lot of hand holding

He’s a sucker for teaching you to skateboard as an excuse to hold your waist and hands to guide you

Any thinly veiled excuse for you two to be touchy is one he’ll take

He was never really into school dances before but if you wanna go

He’ll do the absolute most

Make every single one feel like something out of a teen romcom

Whenever you’re upset he’s right there for you

If you need to talk he’ll listen until you’ve gotten everything off your chest

Need some emotional validation?? Boom you got it

He agrees wholeheartedly and organically that that was a shitty thing for them to say to you! You’re definitely not in the wrong here, and you handled that really maturely

Maybe you just want some cuddles and distraction

Next thing you know you’re watching your favorite shows and movies, going on tiktok and showing each other the funniest videos on your fyps

You’re cuddled up on his lap providing very entertaining commentary and jokes as he levels up on the video game he’s playing

He’ll put his hands over yours on the controller and show you how to play

When you’re not together in person you’ll facetime a lot

Most of the time you’ll do homework together

Which turns into getting ready for bed together

Which turns into procrastinating going to sleep together

His favorite moments are when you fall asleep on facetime

He feels so close to you

Just two humans existing with each other

You’re not aware of this

(obviously, you’re asleep)

But he knows if you ever found out you’d think it’s really cute

You might make some jokes

“Oh I didn’t realize my boyfriend is edward cullen”

“Not like that”

“I like to watch you sleep bella~”

You joke around in a pseudo deep voice

You’d both be giggling disasters before you know it

That’s sort of true with everything though

You always find some way to laugh together

Everything is fun with him cause it’s the two of you doing it

Even tedious, frustrating, boring tasks are suddenly exciting cause it’s an excuse to spend time together

You’re both realizing that it’s true

Everything is just better when you’re with each other

tag list: @afidiofobia @aliyahsutherland

[illogicallyinclined]

can we hear more about Remus Roman and D sharing an apartment?

yes, of course

tws: alcohol mention, cursing

Remus and D spent an evening compiling some of the funniest quotes from the As Heard In the Aces Locker Room twitter so that they could print them out on pieces of printer paper and hang them up on the living room wall behind the couch; this wall is now fondly referred to as “the Quote Wall,” and the quotes are changed out monthly as new ones arise

Remus once head-butted through the wall between the bathroom and living room while bellowing “OH, YEAH” in order to recreate the old Koolaid commercials that he and Roman used to watch as kids; this was done with both Roman and D’s drunken approval and, as a result, Coach Thomas banned all three of them from being drunk together without a chaperone ever again

Roman and D had to unionize to create the “Bath Robe Rule” after they both, on separate occasions, walked into the living room only to find Remus lounging on the couch in the nude

i’ve mentioned before that both Roman and Remus are messy disasters (largely as a result of growing up with maids who were paid to clean up after them), but there are random evenings wherein Roman’s ADHD will compel him to go on cleaning spree - (granted, it’s usually to avoid doing school work)

the twins will use any give prop and/or opportunity to re-enact lightsaber battles; consequently, D has learned to dispose of anything that can be used as a lightsaber, lest the twins get too into their battles and destroy any more furniture

it’s common for Remus and D to team up and convince Roman that inedible things (i.e. playdough, pinecones, etc) are edible; it helps that Remus is willing to eat virtually anything and, as such, will usually exhibit a “sign of good faith” by taking the first bite

Roman tries to get back at them by crafting hyper-realistic fruits out of soap and leaving them on the kitchen table, but he has to stop the prank when he realizes that Remus is fully content eating his creations, Soap Taste Aside

D leaves a bunch of passive aggressive messages on the bathroom mirror via sticky note; such messages include things like “i love it when you don’t flush the fucking toilet” or “PLEASE don’t replace the empty toilet paper roll, i’m always dying to do it myself”