#the stories we leave behind

[television-overload]

The Walls That Tell Our Stories

Post-ep for 21x02 "The Stories We Leave Behind"

What I think we all want to imagine happened after the doors closed on that elevator at the end of the episode.

Word Count: 1,365

Read on AO3

No sooner had the elevator doors opened, than a fiery ball of energy came slamming into his legs.

"Daddy! Daddy!" the little girl yelled, grabbing onto his hand and pulling. "Take a picture of me with the orange wall!" She yanked him forward, already showing signs of that strength she and her mother both shared.

Tony laughed, casting a glance at McGee.

"Sorry, she's heard a lot about these orange walls," he explained, fishing his cell phone out of his coat pocket and dutifully opening the camera app.

He knelt down, holding the phone up so she was in frame.

"Alright, Tali, say, 'NCIS!'" he said, and Tali repeated it, finishing with a big toothy smile and a wild pose she must have learned from her friends at school.

Once he'd taken a couple photos, he clicked the image gallery to check them, holding the phone out to show Tali.

"How's that?" he asked, waiting for her approval.

"Perfect!" she answered. "Now one at your desk!"

Before he could stop her, she darted off to the part of the bullpen he had called home for so many years. It looked a little different now, various personal items stashed on the desks and even some plants making it feel more homey, but it was still the same place.

"Honey, that's not my desk anymore, it's Uncle Tim's," he reminded her. It hadn't been his in a long time, and it was crazy to think of all that had changed since then.

A pouty lip came out, and McGee chuckled. There was a lot of Ziva in her, that was true, but when it came to her personality, she was just so Tony.

"It's okay," he said, giving Tali the go-ahead to sit in his chair. “That was your dad's desk long before it was mine.”

She ran around the edge of it, plopping unceremoniously into the swivel chair and looking around interestedly at everything.

“Dad, did they have computers back when you worked here?”

Tony felt her words like a blow to the chest, and he feigned having the wind knocked out of him. How old did she think he was? He could practically feel the gray hairs sprouting from his head.

“Do you want me to take your picture or not?” he asked, shaking his head, hiding his amusement behind squinted eyes.

She smiled for the camera, then did a few poses pretending she was working.

"How many kids do you know who's number one bucket list item is to visit the headquarters of a government agency?" DiNozzo joked as he snapped a couple more photos. 

Tali had been begging them for years, but it had never been a good time. They’d needed some space to learn how to be a family when Ziva finally came home. And though they wished it had been under better circumstances, at least now they could show their daughter all the places she'd heard about in their stories.

McGee smirked, watching the energetic daughter of his two best friends as she clacked away at his keyboard. 

"I'd expect nothing less from your kid, Tony."

After a moment, Tali looked up, an inquisitive look on her face.

"Which one was Ima's?" she asked, spinning her chair back and forth.

He knelt down in front of her, resting his arms on the edge of the desk, his chin atop his folded hands.

"Which one do you think made it easiest to stare at her all day with heart eyes, Tali-girl?"

She giggled, pausing so she could inspect her options, taking the task very seriously. She tapped her chin in thought.

"That one!" she said, brightening up and pointing to the desk directly across from his.

He grinned, thinking back to all the times he'd sat there thinking about her mother. 

"Bingo!"

"Can I–?"

"Have a picture over there?" he finished, already knowing what she was going to say. "Ask Agent Knight if it's okay."

Jessica Knight was standing near the elevator with Palmer, and it didn't take long for Tali to get her permission. She ran back the short distance, looking triumphant in her return.

"Hey, where is your Ima anyway?" Tony asked as she sat down behind the desk.

"Here!" her familiar voice sounded, echoing in the largely empty bullpen. The door to the women's restroom closed behind her. "Your child is pushing on my bladder. I swear I cannot make it more than an hour without having to pee, these days."

As she approached, Tony tucked her under his arm, glancing around at the walls that held so many of their stories. This was the building that built them. Tali owed her existence to these ugly orange walls and the people that dwelled in them.

"Our daughter has been playing tourist and hitting all the great photo spots," Tony informed her, brows raised sarcastically.

Ziva turned to look at Tali, seated where she used to sit now more than a decade ago. 

"I see that," she said, her lips pulled back in a smile. "Did you tell her about the time we were stuck in the elevator?"

Tony grinned. "Oh yeah, she liked that one."

"Ima, when can we go see the lab?" Tali asked eagerly, interrupting them.

Ziva looked up and saw Jimmy approaching, and she knew there wasn't time right now. She separated herself from Tony, gently tousling Tali's wavy hair. "Another time, baby, I think it's time to head over to the funeral."

Tali nodded, glancing down at her shoes.

"I'm gonna miss Grandducky," she said sadly, playing absentmindedly with an eraser she found on the desk.

"So will we," Tony said, swallowing back emotion. "Aren't you glad he came to visit us during his book tour last year? That was pretty special, huh?"

The littlest DiNozzo nodded again, cheeks widening in a smile. "He was the first to know about my baby brother!" she said, remembering it fondly.

At that, Jimmy looked to Tony and Ziva in mock indignation. "Hey, you told him before any of the rest of us?" he said.

Tony laughed, patting the autopsy gremlin on the shoulder in consolation. "He guessed pretty quick. I think if he'd visited a few weeks earlier, he would have been the one to break the news to us!"

Ducky’s globetrotting semi-retirement had been a blessing to them all. They cherished the few times they'd been able to meet up in recent years, remaining close despite the long distance. He was a part of their family; it was only right that their daughter know him and love him too. They were fortunate for the time they did have together.

Ziva glanced at the clock and sighed, placing a hand on Tony's chest, silently telling him they probably needed to get going. He nodded in response, checking that he had his phone and wallet still before taking her hand in his.

"Alright, well, we can keep sharing memories on the way. Tali? You ready to go?"

"We'll be back, right?"

"Of course," Tony answered. "We've barely scratched the surface here! I still have to take you to interrogation to figure out what happened to that batch of cookies Ima made last week ." He tickled her sides, causing her to erupt in giggles and run ahead of them toward the elevator. They followed, hand in hand, with Jimmy and McGee right behind.

"Squeeze in!" Palmer said, the entire group filling the elevator with little room to spare. The others would be meeting them at the cathedral for the service, everyone who knew and loved Ducky, there to say their final goodbyes.

As the doors closed, Tony leaned down and pressed his lips to Ziva's, his hand resting on her lower back to pull her closer.

"Ugh, guys, really?" McGee complained exaggeratedly, screwing up his face in a look of disgust. Tali put her hands in front of her mouth to hide her giggles.

Ziva looked up at Tony like he was the only other person in the elevator, and he beamed proudly, unashamed and unapologetic.

He squeezed her sides playfully, tucking his face into her shoulder and breathing her in.

"I've always wanted to do that in here."

-.-.-

Tag List (if you want to be tagged when I post Tiva stuff, let me know and I'll add you!): @benedettabeby @earanemith @happygirl-0408 @hopeless-nostalgiac @indestinatus @loudlooks @mrsmungus @nicolem194 @putthekettleon @slippery-soapbox @tivafanfic @tivajunkie @tonysziva

Gonna go out on a limb and also tag @wanna-be-bold @pro-bee @delicatefalice @harmandmac @benditlikepress @irish-trish idk who else I've seen active lately but yeah

[tivajunkie]

MCGEE AND TONY

A Mc-NAME

THE KNOWLEDGE THAT TONY STAYED WITH MCGEE AND THEY WATCHED A MOVIE

TONY’S REFLECTION ON BEING THE ONE LEFT BEHIND

AUTOPSY GREMLIN

I. AM. FREAKING. THRIVING.

[delicatefalice]

THIS tony dinozzo has found the love of his life three times also is a dad 🥹

[lunalovegood2]

We also have the lives we touch while we are here, the people we leave behind. He had a good friend in you.

Tony DiNozzo, NCIS 21x2 "The Stories We Leave Behind"

[djkerr]

Alden Parker Style | NCIS 21x02 The Stories We Leave Behind

[chicgeekgirl89]

Tony came home and I can't stop sobbing about it.

[secretarydamselfly]

The Stories We Leave Behind

Finally got a decent antenna and a great TV, first thing I'm watching on CBS is NCIS episode where Ducky passed away. Great 😭

[trashblog07]

Watching 21x02 of ncis hurts when your childhood was practically was watching ncis. I always loved ducky as a character and saying goodbye to him as a character knowing that he will never be here again feels unreal. R.I.P David Mccalum Thanks for being such a part of my childhood.

[dykealloy]

ripple effect legacy // my tears are becoming a sea, M83

[aardvaark]

im so glad that we never get a clear picture of sophie’s background in leverage & i hope we never do. however i also really like making up various, often conflicting backstories for her in my head. perhaps they’re all backstories for an alias of hers, ones she laid to rest back in season two.

[rainedroptalks]

What is it with fantasy high and girls dying before their lives ever began. How we can never really know who they are, or who they could’ve been. Brennan Lee Mulligan I will find you

[dogearedheart]

anna x mary

[tivajunkie]

I am 0% ready for tonight.

[delicatefalice]

TIK TOK BOOM

he’s HERE!

[lunalovegood2]

We also have the lives we touch while we are here, the people we leave behind.

Tony DiNozzo, NCIS 21x2 "The Stories We Leave Behind"

[fluffypotatey]

To be honest I am a huge Nalu shipper. But the thing is I want to know the difference between the way Natsu cares about his guildmates and Lucy. Like what is the obvious difference since that boy sees every as Nakama so how can we say that the wag he cares about Lucy is different?

Like even when Erza passed away? (All the way back in first season there was a segment where the guild was gathered at her grave and all) Natsu was still very reactive. Plus he was also said to be depressed even when Lisanna passed.

What's the difference between all of them and Lucy?

the fact that he stayed. the fact that before he met Lucy, Natsu wasn't one to stay in a group or even want to work with anyone besides Happy at the start of the story. hell, he was ready to just file Lucy down as "New Guildmate" once they reached Fairy Tail

but then, Lucy doesn't leave. she follows him on his mission to save Macao despite her not needing to or even really understanding everything about it. she stays and then fights with him and saves him. it's no secret that Natsu is strong and can take care of himself really well. he's been going on solo missions for years now, and no one has really stopped him, but that means he's been in a lot of sticky situations where he and Happy are on their own and have no backup. and yet, without asking, Lucy offers it

and i think this is the moment when Natsu considers that maybe it's okay to have someone there to have his back (sans Happy)

"but Natsu only needed Lucy for the next quest because of the requirements," well, Natsu also wouldn't have taken or even considered that quest if it weren't for Lucy, yeah? he was not a team player (in the picking job's sense) or really wanted other people to help him on his quests sans Happy. and then he goes and picks a job that caters to their team whilst ensuring that Lucy can't say no

or maybe i'm reading too much into it 🤷🏻‍♀️

or maybe Natsu's got horrible abandonment issues that he will latch onto people so fast (Igneel & Lisanna) but also cause him to distance himself so far when left behind (his 1st time at the guild, Lisanna's death). Erza and Gray are Natsu's closet friends after Lisanna and yet they cannot reach him when he closes himself off. and then we have Lucy, who stuck by and had his back, so who is to say Natsu didn't make some contingencies to ensure whether or not she'd join him?

but maybe it's the rose, colored ship glasses i have on

because yeah, Natsu cares for all of his guildmates. the power of friendship is his biggest motivator. when we meet Natsu, our first introductions of him is defending his guild's reputation from Bora (who was using it as a guise for human trafficking) and saving Macao. and our 1st big arc (Galuna Island), where Natsu adamantly refuses to allow Gray to use Ice Shell and sacrifice himself despite how antagonistic they've been to each other. we get Natsu 100% at Erza's defense throughout the Tower of Heaven and he is even ready to defend Wendy though they only met hours ago

Natsu is a character with a bleeding heart and cannot help but wear it on his sleeve, but we don't really see him allow others to fight his battles or have his back until Lucy comes in. to be honest, i don't even think he had his heart on his sleeve until Lucy. he still has a bleeding heart (i don't think anything could stop that), but he was not ready to be open in receiving company because he was so used to it being ripped away from him

that being said: of all the characters he interacts with, he finds Lucy to be someone compatible enough for him to start going on team missions and inviting her on them (for example, his 1st S-class mission, which he stole, he went to her house to show it to her. the fact that part of the reward was a celestial key might be a coincidence, but i wouldn't doubt it as Natsu and Happy's trump card in case she refused)

but yeah, the difference is that he stayed and didn't push her away at the beginning, but instead continued to invite her along with him to the point that doing a mission without Lucy wasn't his regular anymore. compared to the rest of the guild, of whom he spent most of his childhood with, even if he spoke to no one, they would still be around and talk to him anyway. he might not invite them on job and only challenge them to fights, but the guild is his home and a constant in his life, a constant he needs (bc heavy abandonment issues).

"okay, but he still pushed her away after he watched Igneel die right in front of him. and he left the guild for a whole year, too. so what's the difference there?" you may ask.

so 1) Natsu never thought the guild would disband. he returns to Fiore after a year and is the last to know that they disbanded. he assumed, like all the other times before and while he and others were sealed for 7 years, that Fairy Tail would still be there when he returned. he assumed that his disappearance would not impact so hard because the guild would still be around and Lucy would have the others with her

which, did not happen :)

and like, so many guild members go off on jobs, quests, or even just leave for an indiscriminate amount of time (which i, personally, believe was his rationality for leaving), so him being gone for a year was nothing! right? no harm, eh? his plan was never to be gone forever :))))

2) he just watched his father die and lose any chance of having some semblance of a long term reunion with Igneel. he literally lost one of his main driving motivations for getting stronger and taking jobs. before Fairy Tail, before anyone, it was Igneel. and to learn that a) Igneel was always with him to begin with and b) he only got to see him for less than a day after 14 years of nothing......i would feel lost too ngl

man's needed space from everybody. and he also needed comfort, but Natsu has been shown not to really be the character who asks to receive comfort (and when he does receive it, it's usually when he's already emotionally compromised). he is in the habit of shutting people out after being abandoned or losing someone close to him, with his next rationale being to "get stronger" in order to prevent what happened in the past to ever happen in the future.

anyway

what makes this different? well for one, he sent the letter only to Lucy (or it's implied since no one else is shown getting one) because of how the two spend most of their time together. even the line that goes with the panel makes it sound like Natsu is unsure on how the note will be received (maybe even hesitant? but that could be my own hopes)

and one of the 1st people he reunites with after a year is Lucy and we get such a similar parallel to the first chapter of Fairy Tail between the two as if the narrative itself is slotting them together to say "ah yes, now everything is back to normal and new journeys can begin"

but yeah, this is just a long way of saying, that Natsu does love his friends and guildmates but even when he is close to them, he kept to himself (and Happy) and sort of stayed in their orbit but always with some emotional distance because of his fear of abandonment. and then you have Lucy where he will stay for and allow her to orbit around him and he will invite to new adventures no questions asked

that's the difference