#the show is terrible but look at my beautiful scarecrow

[toooftenobsessed]

Colm Feore as Nathan in Landman.

[box-of-chaooos]

I can’t remember who gave me this prompt but thank you tysm!!

Stuck on the bus and this caught my eye so let’s go

Any adaption but I’ll be writing in the 1986 ver

The emerald city, a sparkling palace of peace and wonder that sat in the centre of oz, ruled by the kind and wise king who was recently crowned, king scarecrow. The straw man was a wonderful king and made all the people happy as could be but he was bored. Bored out of his new mind it wasn’t as fun as he’d imagined it to be it was much slower, much much slower. Nothing new ever happened no excitement no action, sure it wasn’t a terrible thing it made the working system smooth and well oiled but dull as could be.

At the moment the king was going through old possessions of the wizard, left behind trinkets and inventions piled up in the other room, there was bound to be something interesting there. He searched through many chests finding boxes some empty some filled with little bits and bobs, one had a little wooden horse to make inside. He found puzzle boxes and sparkling jewellery some of which he put on just for the fun of it, admiring himself in the mirror with a giggle but nothing was very attention keeping or eye catching. He needed a book, a nice big interesting book to read with action and drama something adventurous to make him new brain fizzle with pictures and imaginary scenes of the book turning words into pictures. He settled on the idea and had a look through more chests. The wizard had so many books old ones new ones even ones in a different language but they where all more instruction like than story books. He shouldn’t have been surprised the wizard would’ve needed something to help build his inventions but he’d had hope there would be at least some sort of story book. He sighed and sat ontop of a crate glumly putting his head in his hands. He had so much energy to spare and so little time to use it. He shifted uncomfortably something was under him and it wasn’t nice. He stood up turning around to see what was under him. A book. A deep green cover dusty and old with worn edges and a beautiful picture on the front of a princess and a frog. Intrigued by the illustration scarecrow picked it up and dusted it of slightly. The picture was a little bit faded but the colours just seemed to catch his attention. He wasted no time running back to the throne room and sitting down in his velvet throne eager to read this precious jewel he’d found.

Time ticked by and scarecrow was absorbed into the book, slumped lazily with his legs over the thrones arms swinging them back and forth subconsciously as he read the book. It was fascinating a witch, a princess and a prince turned into a frog by a magic spell, there was small pictures here and there which made scarecrows eye shimmer. He was almost finished with the book, it wasn’t lengthy but wasn’t short either. Eyes glued to the book they scanned along the lines of words he began to mutter to himself. “And the princess leaned in, kissing the frog turning him back into the handsome prince he was before” he read, but something made him itch with curiosity. What was kissing? He flipped the page and saw an image of the princess and the frog with their lips touching gently. Was that was a kiss was than? Gently pressing lips to another as a show of love? He was amazed and an idea sparked in his brain. The tin man, perhaps tin man would know after all he was a human once and with a partner at that. He giggled a common occurrence when he was excited or happy and got up the book was tossed aside for now. Since becoming ruler he and the tin man and lion had all found shortcuts to each other’s domains which cut the time practically in half. He grabbed his hat and put the crown on the throne heading down the steps and out the dark room all together.

Winkie country a land once desolate and filled with worry was now filled with life, winkies where free to work and where happy as could be especially with their new ruler leading them. Tin man was having a ball really, he was polished as he needed making his tin shine like diamonds in the light, he was able to forge weapons for the winkies, gardening tools so they could grow crops and plant beds of pretty poppies around the land. The winkies country had never been better. At the moment tin man was in the old witches castle that sat on a little ledge, he was potting up some lovely purple flowers he’d received from a winkie lady as a thank you for restoring their land. Purple, a colour that showed royalty and power but also a colour that reminded him of his dearest friend, the scarecrow. Scarecrows eyes, his beautiful violet eyes, even just paint so filled with life and a passion for living it. It made tin man swoon any time the straw man looked to him with those eyes with that wide smile his new heart would skip a beat he swore he could hear his tin drumming as it hit the metal so hard. His heart was fluttering just at the thought of scarecrow. Soft glove hands, the smell of fresh straw, his voice his laugh his plush body he looked so huggable and warm. “Tin man?” Someone called. He just wanted to hold scarecrow closely. “Tin man?” To love him with all his heart and tell him that. “Tin man!” He jumped startled by the voice. He looked over and saw those exact amethyst eyes glistening at him.

“Scarecrow!” Tin man chuckled happily standing up. “It’s good to see you” he said shaking hands with him. They hadn’t seen each other for a while since they where now kings. “How’s everything in the emerald city?” He asked starting up conversation. “Oh slow but it’s wonderful really, everyone’s very kind and friendly” scarecrow replied. “That’s wonderful” tin man smiled but noticed that his straw friend seemed to be a little fidgety like there was something he wanted to say or ask but wasn’t sure. “Tin man,” he began softly “do you know.. what kissing is?” He asked. Tinman felt his heart skip again, did scarecrow want to kiss him? “I, yes I know what it is… why?” He was getting nervous with anticipation. “Well I was reading this book about a princess and a frog.. and they kissed and I was just wondering…” he shuffled about a little putting his head down. “how does it work?…”

If y’all want a continuation I may have somethin for ya! Keep an eye out hehe I’m back into oz again.

[sifahfawziah]

Book Identity

Title : The Wonderful Wizard Of Oz

Author : L. Frank Baum

Publisher : PT. Gramedia Pustaka Utama

Publication Year : 2017

Genre : Fiction, Adventure

Number of pages : 184

Price : Rp. 59,000

The Wizard Of Oz

This book was originally published in 1900. It tells about a girl who gets lost in the magical land of OZ with her dog, Toto. She meets a good witch with some Munchkins. The good witch gave the girl directions to meet the Wizard of Oz to back home in Kansas, by following the yellow road. On the girl's journey, she met some friends Scarecrow, Tin woodman, and Crowdly lion. Who also decides to meet with the Wizard of Oz to ask for a request. Many challenges faced them during the journey to meet the Wizard of Oz.

*************

I was really interested in this book, and it turned out to be very inspiring. I saw this Wizard of Oz story through a movie, I think the storyline in the movie is more complex than in the book. The storyline it has in the book is full of imagination that is very suitable for children to enjoy. At first I thought The Wizard of Oz was a story that would only be enjoyed by children, but this story is perfect for adults to enjoy as well.

Many elements and scenes are not found in the movie The Wizard of Oz. As on the pages 54 -56 as they crossed the ditch and the river. The scene depicts good cooperation. Although each of them has flaws, without realizing it they have done something that they think is a flaw. And also, on this pages, I can feel the progression made by each of the characters. Like the Tin woodman who cries as he accidentally steps on a small beetle (page 50) . How can someone who doesn't have a heart crying when he finds out he has killed a small beetle?

“This will serve me a lesson,” said he, “to look where i step. For if i should kill another bug or beetle i should surely cry again, and crying rusts my jaws so that i cannot speak”

In this scene, the Tin Woodman teaches the importance of being more careful when stepping. Additionally, the Tin Woodman briefly forbids the Cowardly Lion from killing the forest animals for Dorothy's dinner. This scene shows the progress made by the Tin Woodman, who has no heart.

“Don’t ! please dont,” begged the Tin Woodman, “ I should cry certainly weep if you killed a poor deer, and then my jaws would rust again”

And the cowardly lion also tried to faces his fears, boldy jumping the ditch to reach the Emerlad Kingdom

"I am terribly afraid of falling, myself," said the Cowardly Lion, "but I suppose there is nothing to do but try it. So get on my back and we will make the attempt."

Even Scarecrow can provide a solution with his own brain to give the idea of cutting down tree as their access to cross deep trenches.

So they sat down to consider what they should do, and after serious thought the Scarecrow said:

"Here is a great tree, standing close to the ditch. If the Tin Woodman can chop it down, so that it will fall to the other side, we can walk across it easily."

"That is a first-rate idea," said the Lion. "One would almost suspect you had brains in your head, instead of straw."

In the story of the Wizard of Oz, many life lessons are contained in several scenes. This book teaches how important cooperation is to achieve common desires, support each other, help each other, and teaches how important the role of the family in life is. This book conveys the message that everything we need is actually already in us, there is no need for the help of others or external parties. The picture of the emerlad city that is told, it is easy to imagine how beautiful and colorful the country is. Maybe if I read this book as a child, I would be annoyed with Dorothy for preferring to live in Kansas full of gray color.

L. Frank Baum's writing style is very imaginative and easy to understand, each character has their own unique characteristics and ambitions that make readers easily remember them. Dorothy herself is portrayed as a brave and kind-hearted girl and the other characters, although created with a somewhat stereotypical, can bring humor in each scene.

The weakness of this book is that there are several scenes that are inappropriate to be shown for children. For example, when Tin Woodman tells that he accidentally cut off a part of his body, the Eastern Witch fell on Dorothy's house, and killed the Western Witch. I think the scene shown is very dark and scary.

I highly recommend this book, This book also teaches us about the power of individual choice and action. Dorothy and her friends are not passively waiting for a miracle to happen, they are actively taking action to achieve their goals. It teaches that we have the power to change our own destiny through our choices and actions. This book also teaches us to be tolerant, all the characters created have different weaknesses, and they can accept each other. it also teaches about strength and hope. Even though they face obstacles, the characters in this book can be optimistic in making their wishes come true.

[mahougotham]

Usagi

“You’re lucky to make it out of there!”

“It’s not that bad it’s just a bruise- hey!”

Jonathan was interrupted by a cold wet towel to the face.

“It’s a bruise that’s taking up half your face,” Jervis scolded, “hold that on there I’m going to poor another cup of tea.”

His guest wordlessly obeyed, noting that the towel itself was rather soft and looked expensive.

“I had a rabbit as a child,” Jervis said, “Well, I didn’t have it. It was wild and it would visit the courtyard every now and then. Beautiful brown fur, cute floppy ears and I would always look forward to seeing it every day.”

“Jervis where is this go-“

“Hush, keep that towel on,” Jervis waved off a very irritable Scarecrow, “I would look forward to seeing it every day. And then the visits stopped. At first I thought it was just a little lost and then after weeks of no shows it was becoming glaringly obvious that perhaps something terrible happened to it.”

Normally, Jonathan would point out that tragedy was bound to happen, after all it was a wild rabbit. But Jonathan sat there quietly, realizing what that story was telling him.

“I’m not a rabbit,” he deadpanned.

“You’re skittish, temperamental and I find both you and rabbits very endearing,” he scrunched his face a bit, “though in your case, you’re endearing in the way people find haunted shrines and ghost stories to be.”

Jonathan just huffed at that as Jervis took the towel away to dip it back in warm water and put it back on his face.

“My little rabbit,” the geisha doted.

“Jervis please.”

“My hare~”

“Jervis I have half the mind to gas you.”

[adelemadouce]

Becoming Madame

~~ Mademoiselle Adèle Papin (future Madame Duchâtel) consents to marry Charles Duchâtel under the following conditions: 1. Both spouses have their own bedroom, which the spouse may only enter with consent! 2. Marital intercourse is only performed to ensure one-time offspring! 3. In case of pregnancy of Mademoiselle Papin (future Madame Duchâtel) the performance of the marital duty will be immediately prohibited! 4. The husband, Charles Duchâtel, undertakes to financially support the mother and child until his own death! ~~

Moira looked up from the document. "Have we forgotten something important?" She looked expectantly at me. Then she said in an indignant voice: "It's a crime! This old scarecrow is thirty years older than you! It's outrageous!" I corrected Moira quietly. "Thirty-one!" She rolled her eyes wildly. "Even more worse!" I started to cry again. I had been crying all the time for the last few days. And tomorrow I was supposed to marry the old scarecrow! "You must get pregnant as soon as possible, Adèle. As soon as you are carrying his child he'll leave you alone," she waved the document, "...Just as it says here! Listen to me carefully...when he'll come to your bed tomorrow night, you turn your back to him..." Moira's voice became more conspiratorial. "...but before you must pull your nightgown over your hips, so he can get to your butt. Then you lift your leg like I showed you...and then he can mate with you. He won't see you naked...or kiss you!" I was desperate and layed my head on Moira's shoulder. "Do you promise me that? Please...I will never be able to kiss that old man...never!" Moira pressed me to her heart. "You don't have to kiss the old man, I promise! We can only hope and pray that he still manages to give you a good load. When is your next bleeding?" I thought for a moment, then I replied: "In three weeks!". Moira smiled weakly. "That's good! Then your fertile days are starting now. If only the old goat gives you a good load! You must get pregnant quickly, chérie!" I only half understood this whole thing, it all sounded awful. "Can I wash myself afterwards?" Moira rolled her beautiful green eyes again. "No! No way! You have to keep all the stuff inside...absolutely!" I grimaced in disgust. "Is it like water?" But Moira shook her head. "It's more like tapestry-paste. It's viscous and sticky. You'll find it disgusting! But it brings you freedom, Adèle...and that's all you have to think about!" I nodded, my eyes moist. Moira continues to try to calm me. "I'll be in the small chamber next to the bedroom. If he does something terrible to you...scream as loud as you can! I'll be there right away...with my little stiletto!"

What nightmare had my life become? Would I ever had hope for happiness again?

Even though I could not have imagined my future happiness at that time, things seemed to develop better than I expected. Duchâtel accepted my marriage contract. My father, who could not speak, was however, of sound mind! He read the contract and signed it with my help. Duchâtel had to accept it...After all my father was a lawyer! However, Duchâtel was cunning enough to define a clause in the contract for himself - he insisted on having marital intercourse as often as he liked, until the first sign of pregnancy. I gritted my teeth and accepted in silence.

My wedding night was terrible. I followed Moira's instructions and it seemed that I could satisfy Duchâtel despite my passivity. After the painful first time, he immediately wanted to do it again. He snorted like a pig and pumped it all inside me. Then he left me alone. And that's how it was supposed to be every night. I finally got used to it (if I could call it that?!) and let it happen. However, he also demanded it during the day. When I was drinking tea with Maman, when I was reading or stiching, he suddenly appeared and asked to speak to me in his study. I knew immediately what he wanted, followed him without saying a word, lifted my skirts, bent over the table and let him copulate. I began to count the days. I counted and counted...and then finally...the day came without my bleeding...I was pregnant!!!

At this time we were preparing to move to Paris. Duchâtel had bought a big house in Faubourg St. Martin. For all of us! My brother Dominique was to study at the 'École Polytéchnique', financed by Duchâtel. Papa was to get the best doctors of Paris and a cure in the Ardennes, financed by Duchâtel. I was given a chambermaid, a horse, and a diamond parure (tiara, bracelets, pendeloques and necklace!), financed by Duchâtel. I was pregnant and full of hope. I wrote all this to Moira, who was already eagerly awaiting me in Paris!

[hoodievixen]

With My Own Eyes - Part 3 - Waxing Crescent (2 of 2) (Dream of the Endless x OC)

Based off of this

Summary: Morpheus just wanted to keep his soulmate safe. She just wanted to make her own decisions. Doesn't help that he doesn't show her his face.

Words Count: ~2.5 K

Warnings: swearing, mentions of blood, witchcraft, bad grammar and even worse spelling.

A/N: I did it.

Tag List:  @intothesoul​ (sry I forgot on the last chapter)

Master List

_________________________

Sibyl woke up from the sun hitting her eyelids.  She just rolled over to cover her head with a pillow. She stayed in her awkward position of half falling off the bed as the fog of sleep was leaving her mind. Her first coherent thought of the day was of how she didn't remember going to bed. Her second was how she was not getting used to sleeping in jeans, and needed to figure that out come the next night. Her third jumped back to the first, figuring Morpheus had probably carried her to bed.

The last half of the prior day had been spent in her art studio. After getting over the awe, Sibyl was frantically going around swatching anything and everything she could. That had then turned to furious sketching, digging up ideas she had burred for the simple fact she didn't have the resources to do it. Morpheus had stayed with her for the most of it. Sibyl cringed into herself, remembering her terrible attempts at holding a conversation. Sibyl is prone to word vomit when focusing on something else. As well as rambling, but that's more of a constant than circumstantial. Not to mention the dream king wouldn't respond to something unless he saw in necessary, which lead to Sibyl just spew half coherent statements. "Can't you just shut up?" she questioned herself.

Needing to start her day she got up to change. Sibyl hadn't even taken a step before she heard something move beyond the door to the bedroom. It was a lot of shuffling and bumping into things. She did not know what she was going to find. With slow cautious steps she retrieved her knife from her jacket. She continued with the same precautions to the door out of the bedroom. Sibyl threw open the door, thrusting the knife in front of her.

"G'mornin' Sleeping Beauty," an unfamiliar character greeted her. Sibyl saw there was no threat and lowered the knife. There in the sitting room was once again Matthew, again in the same place. With him was the new person, if she could even call it a person. It was basically a living scarecrow with a jack-o-lantern for a head. He was in the process of hanging a large painting above the fire place.

"What is going on?" Sibyl asked in confusion. She knew she slept in late, so things would be happening, just didn't expect them to be in her room.

"Lord Morpheus told me to hang this up," the pumpkin grumbled. "Is it centered now?"

Matthew tilted his head to the side. "A bit more to the left."

Sibyl was just confused. Why would he do such a thing? Sibyl looked at the painting in a golden frame. It wasn't something profound, but she could find the beauty and meaning in it. The more she looked at it, the more it seemed familiar. The color tones, the brush patterns. "A Monet?" she questioned. While it was rather basic, Monet was indeed her favorite artist. She would put money down she shared that fact they day before, she just wasn't sure.

With his work being one she adored, Sibyl was familiar with almost all of them. However this one she had never seen before. It was of a forest path, a young couple walking together hand in hand, with long shadows cast from the twilight sun.

"You know your art M'lady," the pumpkin commented. "Doubt you've seen this one before. It's a Dreaming exclusive. He never got around to making it in the waking world."

Sibyl was in awe, taking in something no one has even seen awake.

With the picture hung, the pumpkin left. "See'ya around Mervyn," Matthew called after him. The raven changed his attention to the amazed human. "That was Mervyn he's sorta the handy man around her. A bit prickly, but he means well."

Sibyl's awe was quick to return to confusion. "Why would he give this to me?" she wondered. First the similar clothing, then the art studio, now this one of a kind masterpiece for her to have in her own chambers. She didn't feel like she deserved all of this, nor did he need to give her all of this.

"You think I know?" Matthew scoffed. "He's in my head not the other way around."

Sibyl turned her questioning onto the bird. She could see he was not joking. "That is mildly concerning," she confessed. "I'm gonna go... get ready..." Sibyl recognized the feeling of grease building up in her hair and wanted to bathe.

Returning to her bed room to head to the bathroom she paused. She had grown used to the smell of roses lingering in the air. It wasn't that the scent of flowers had disappeared, but had changed. In the vases in the room all the roses had been swapped out for larkspur. Bundles of white, blue, pink, and purple. Her favorite flowers. Again, her over sharing, and him doing unnecessary things for her. Though she could confess, she didn't feel too burdened by this one.

-----------

So many things are better taught through stories. One is more likely to remeber what happened in a series of events than a list of different necessaries. Sibyl knew this to be true with fabels, stories to teach moral reasoning to children. She learned it more so when deciphering her family's grimore. Fiction had made it so people believe that grimore are like a cook book, a collection of instructions and ingredients. But witch craft is more like cooking than baking, not so much reliant on exacts more so about what they make as a whole.

Witches of old knew stories would change as they were told orally, relying on the faulty of human knowledge alone. So they wrote down their stories, and so did the children, and their children's children, making a grimore. A collection of a family's stories of spells and what brought them to casting them.

When the full understanding of "every story ever written, and those that haven't been" settled in Sibyl's mind, she came to a realization. She could access all the grimoires ever written. Those lost to museums, or bloodlines died out, even the ones burned with the owner. All of them were head, and she could bring what has been forgotten into memory. The best thing of it all, they were in English. Oh the wonders of magical dream libraries.

Matthew had grown bored of her company as Sibyl lost focus in conversation instead for figuring out the spell's details in the stories. It didn't take long for the raven to fly off to find something more interesting. She wasn't sure how much time had passed, before a cool breeze stole her attention.

Sibyl looked away from her book to find Morpheus standing beside her. "Hello there," she greeted him, leaning back in the chair she was sitting in.

"You appear to be settling in well," Morpheus commented.

Sibyl shrugged. She wasn't much of a person to sit around all the time. She liked doing things. It keeps her mind and body busy.

"There is something I wish to give you," he informed her, reaching for the object in his pocket.

Sibyl let out a whine. "Another?" she complained.

Morpheus hesitated.

"I don't need anything," Sibyl continued, "I know you're just trying to be nice. But I don't want to receive gift after gift. It's one thing to get one occasionally, but not multiple in one day."

Morpheus lowered into the seat next to her. His previous partners enjoyed getting showered in thing. They'd never want for anything. Nor was it something he would struggle to provide. He could make them anything they desired. He could provide for them with ease.

"Have you even thought about how large the power imbalance is between us?" Sibyl wondered, "Your are the anthropomorphic personification of dreams, while I am a simple human. A healthy relationship is between two equals, where anything you do for me I should be able to do for you. With all the gifts I feel like I owe you something."

" You owe me nothing, "he assured her, "Your presence is all I'd ever ask for."

Sibyl let out a frustrated groan. "I didn't even want to be here," she reminded him, expressing her anger. "I'm not some item you can claim. You can't just appease me with things. I didn't ask for any of this." A few tears of frustration started to leak from her eyes.

Morpheus was frozen. He could understand he had done something wrong. He had believed she had gotten over his mistake with forcing her to come to the Dreaming without a choice of her own. After yesterday Dream had believe she had come to like it in the Dreaming, and possibly even him. But everything he was doing was just making her even more uncomfortable.

He wanted to reach out and wipe away her tears, but that wasn't a privilege he had earned yet. "I apologize," he started. "I must confess it has been a long time since I've courted anyone."

Sibyl let out a tired laugh. She reached up, wiping away her tears with the heel of her palm. "Well to start with, it's now called dating," she explained, "And it's more about getting to know eachother and earning trust than proving you can provide for the other person."

"Then would you do me the honor of allowing me to date you?" he asked.

Sibyl softly smiled and rolled her eyes. "I think I agreed to that a couple days ago."

----------

"Where do you want to go?" Morpheus asked Sibyl as the two walked out of the castle. He wanted to do what she wanted today.

Sibyl shrugged, "Like in general? Or what?"

"Anywhere that exists or dosen't," he clarified.

"Man that made it so much harder," Sibyl complained. Not that the options became too many, but more too few. Sibyl liked to love life. When she could, and something when she couldn't shed go to see the world. If she hasn't set foot in a country it's only because she had yet to think of a reason to do so. Then all the places in her head she puts down onto paper.

But there was one place she had come to miss. "Home," she mumbled, before laughing at the mistake she made. "Not like that," Sibyl sorta apologized. She hung it over his head for many days, she didn't need to any longer.

"I meant my childhood home," she clarified. "It's been so many years since I've seen the place."

That was no problem at all for Morpheus.

Much like you would suddenly be in a different place in a dream, they were no longer standing on the bridge leading to the Dream Palace.

Instead it was a back yard covered in shade. Sibyl gazes at the back of the house with an amused smile. Thought she was not sure, she knew the back of this house didn't look like this anymore. Scilla wasn't there to keep the flower beds neat. The steps were making weird noises back then, you must need to skip over some now. Then rain, snow, and sun would have faded that blue paint of the house. Yet here the house stood, frozen in time. Before the weight of being an adult sunk onto her. Before the worries of the world.

Instead of stepping closer to the house she turned and head for the woods that surrounded them. The woods she knew so well, after all she grew up in them. Even with a single step past the tree line felt so much different. It felt like home.

With an in viable weight of her shoulders Sibyl started walking through the forest. She knew exactly where she wanted to go. She felt Morpheus' precense behind her. Despite the silence, she said nothing. If he wanted to get closer to her, he'd need to start conversations himself.

There up in the old tree with wild branches was what she was headed to. When her brother was a tween he and his friends found a shipping pallet behind the nearby grocery store. They lugged it all the way back here into the woods, tied it to the tree with some old rope they found in someone's garage. Then later on when they got a new rug in the living room, they brought the hold one out here to cover the pallet. It wasn't much of a tree house, but she loved it like it was.

With the added height and strength from age getting up was far easier than she ever remembered. Sibyl settled down in her favorite spot, where the pallet met an upturned branch. She was now to tall for the peculiar angle to be a proper back rest any more.

"You're welcome to come up," she called down to Morpheus. Already, she had out a sketch book and digging for the right pencil in the bag she brought.

The dream lord basically appeared before her, lounging proudly on the aging carpet. Sibyl rolled her eyes, far too regal to climb a tree. "What significance dose this place hold?" he wondered, gazing at the woods below.

"Spent a lot of time out here as a kid," Sibyl shrugged, "There's a lot of memories here for me."

"Like what?" Morpheus wondered.

Sibyl smirked, looking to the ground at the bottom of the tree. "When I fell off of here and broke my leg, my brother needed to carry me to the house. Or playing huge games of hide and seeks with all of our friends. Needed to stay between the tree that looks like it's screaming, the fallen down maple, the yard line, and the creek. We'd hide thing for the others to find. Sometimes their own things. I found a Barbie I lost when I was eight during my last year of highschool. I could go on... These trees are like an old friend. They hold so many secrets."

Morpheus hummed, taking in the story fragments as she told them. "You have siblings?" he questioned. It obviously was not a rare possibility, but it was a means of conversation of which he could relate to.

"Yeah," Sibyl sighed, leaning back more. "We don't see eachother much anymore. We all moved somewhere. My brother moved to New York City, my sister went to Boston, and I came over to London. It rare all three of us are together even for holidays. We still talk, but phone calls and texts only means so much."

He noticed a detail that didn't quite ass up to everything she was saying. "You had said 'brothers' as in more than one," he pointed out, "Did something happen?"

Sibyl's face grew solemn and her hand stopped moving. She started to run her thumb over the corner of the sketchbook, listening to the pages hitting eachother. "He died," she said in a soft tone. "He was fifteen at the time, I was thirteen. It happened out in this forest.

After that we didn't come out here much, and surely didn't go as deep as we once had. Never further than this very tree."

A still silence fell between them. "I lost a sister once," Morpheus confessed, "It was eons ago. Yet you never forget an event like that. Losing someone so close to you."

Sibyl finally looked to him, trying to make eye contact with him. "No, you really don't," she agreed pain hurried in her voice.

"If you don't mind my wondering," Dream started, "How did he pass."

Sibyl stated quiet averting her gaze. She did not wish to tell.

[martianbugsbunny]

OUAT Thoughts Pt.27--Episodes 12-13

I have watched through S3E13; spoilers DNI. Also, spoilers warning for anyone further behind than I am.

—I am now internally screaming in an excited/relieved manner.

—I love that aside from Henry’s lost memories, we’re basically picking up where we left off. No long, complicated process for Emma getting her memories back or getting back to her parents. This show cuts to the chase in all the right places.

—There is nothing aesthetically pleasing about the Wicked Witch. The green skin, orange hair, red lipstick, and bright blue eyes are an overwhelming combination. Also, the shade of green sucks. Now, Wicked Witch with a more aquamarine-ish tone, dark teal lipstick, medium blue or dark eyes, and let’s be real, dark hair (because no other shade could possibly look decent with green skin) would be living.

—Girl, I gotta put up flying monkeys now? I hate every single monkey, and these demon-monkeys are even worse. *shakes head disapprovingly*

—Baelfire cuts a rather dashing figure in fairytale clothes.

—Aurora and Philip are cowards. Everyone else is self-sacrificing to the point of ludicrousness, and they’re willing to betray Snow and Charming to the Wicked Witch. They’re having a baby—well, Cindy was clearly younger when she was pregnant, and she still risked her life to trap Rumple. Still don’t like Aurora. Very glad Mulan dodged that bullet.

—Speaking of Mulan, where is she? The Merry Men showed up, but no evidence of her. Which is terribly sad, because she’s awesome.

—Dr. Hopper’s plaid scarf is so cute. As is Dr. Hopper himself. And no, I do not apologize for mooning over him all the time.

—Dwarves being snatched by the fricking monkeys is not cool.

—“I’m a doctor, not a vet!” Yaaass, Frankenstein! I stan a doctor who references the one, the only, the icon, Dr. Bones McCoy. (TOS is so kitsch. I love it.)

—I like the potential that Robin and Regina are building. Not quite enemies to lovers (you know, if all goes according to plan) but it’s decent.

—Yes, Regina definitely needed to have more family complications in her life. It’s not like she goes evil on her family members or anything.

—At least the Wicked Witch is evil. That’s better than having a beef with someone nice, like Snow. Also, this time I want Regina to win.

—I actually like Regina these days. She’s complex, and it’s interesting that she’s unrepentant for her crimes, except maybe for the stuff that upset Henry, and she’s a pretty good mother. The amount she cares for Henry is beautiful.

—I’m like 90% sure Ginnifer Goodwin is actually pregnant at this point in the show. They’ve been using the classic clothing items that are used to cover up a pregnancy, until the moment arrived where Snow could be pregnant in canon.

—I hope other Oz characters show up. This show could do some wildly interesting things with the Wizard, I’m sure. Also, if the Scarecrow and the Tin Man aren’t dating and riding into battle on a lion, I’m gonna be a lil disappointed. (Okay, maybe that’s a bit much to ask, but how cool would it be?)

—Dorothy was never boring. My favorite Oz book is the second one, but throughout the series Dorothy is level-headed, intelligent, and kind. She would do well in this show.

—Feral Rumple is sending me. He’s got stubble. He’s doing the Dark One voice. I’m about to combust.

—I do wish he wasn’t suck in a cage in the Wicked Witch’s basement, though. He deserves better. Also, I’m terrified she’s made him evil again, and I just don’t think I can handle that.

[batarella]

The Bullet: A Sequel to The Commander - Part 7 *FINALE* (Jason Todd x Reader)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH THIS FUCKING FINALE I SWEAR. HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOY BECAUSE THIS IS THE MOST ACTION PACKED FINALE I’VE EVER WRITTEN.

WORDS: 14349 WARNINGS: FIREARMS, VIOLENCE, DEATH

MASTERLIST

THE BULLET MASTERLIST

-----

Strapped onto the wheel chair like a rabid circus freak, Y/N knew exactly where she was headed. She just didn’t know what for.

With her neck being held back she could only look at the bulbs of white fluorescent light that continually passed by her and couldn’t do so much as look at the ground. Plenty of guards were around her as well. She didn’t bother struggling, nor did she speak. But there were even more armed guards lining up, going to wherever she was going as well. All the way up to a white room.

A mission. Her first mission with the squad. Just delightful.

“Deadshot?” the guard near the door asked. When the ones carrying her wheelchair gave him her files, she was let in.

She was the last one to arrive. Because everyone had their eyes on her the moment she graced them with her presence.

The first one that caught Y/N’s eye was, of course, Amanda Waller. With the room littered with her goons and guards, the woman stood at the very front, against a blank wall with her hands behind her back and her eyebrow quirked up right at Y/N. Y/N squinted her eyes back at her, some sort of a decline to her superiority, and Waller looked amused.

Then when the guards parted to make way for her, she was brought to the very center of the room, where there were five rather familiar faces giggling and snarling at the newest member of the squad. The one at the center, Rick Flag, ordered his men to place Y/N on the leftmost side.

Those faces, the ones she’s seen more often than she wished she had. Some already knew her. Some hated her. And some simply didn’t care.

Harley Quinn. Of course, out of everyone else in the room, was the only one bubbling with laughter and other nonsense spurting out of her mouth. She was waving her legs around the wheelchair like a little girl would on a swing. And she was staring at her, laughing. “WE GOT A NEW GIRL ON THE SQUAD!!!” she bellowed out. “WHAT?! DEADSHOT’S NEICE. THAT’S NEPOTISM RIGHT THERE.” Y/N ignored her.

The one beside her was someone she didn’t know personally, someone she’s never even met. They said this guy came from Australia and robbed almost every bank there was. Captain Boomerang. He, too, was strapped to a chair, though he wasn’t as loud as Harley. Y/N saw him eye her head to toe while he bit his lip, and she shot Boomerang a knife-like scowl before his eyes got too comfortable.

The next one. Killer Frost. A beautiful woman with ice-white skin and the hair of an arctic fox. She didn’t give Y/N so much as a glance. Most probably because they had her stored in a coffin-like chamber with only a glass window where her head could be seen. On the inside, she could see the glass covered in frost, and the chamber looked cold to touch. She was calm, reserved. And looked on at Waller’s direction.

The creature beside Frost was the one she really wouldn’t want to mess with the most. The largest in the room, with blue skin and a body ten times the mass of any human being possibly could be. He had the head of a shark, eyes red like her optics. He even had a fin sticking out his back. and he was muzzled and strapped standing upright with five more guards around him. Y/N could hear him growl, wordless, and when she caught his eye, he snarled at her.

Finally, El Diablo. The quietest out of the bunch. His wheelchair looked just like hers, except his hands were completely covered by iron cylinders, probably filled with ice cold water. The man was covered in tattoos, and he didn’t have a shirt on. His face looked like a skull’s, which made the way he looked at everyone else look more menacing than his supposed behaved demeanor.

These were the dangerous people she’s stuck with, most probably for the rest of her life if all else fails and she’ll never be able to get out. The people that Floyd had worked with. And they were a few of the most maniacal villains there were in the whole country. She wished she could tell herself she didn’t belong. But she actually did. In fact, she had no business going about pretending to be better than all these people. When it came to how much blood they’ve shed, she probably wasn’t too far off from Harley. Maybe even more.  

Y/N was right where she truly belonged. Today, she is welcomed as the newest member of the Suicide Squad.

Waller stepped out to the front. “Y/N, your team. Let’s cut to the chase. We don’t have much time. Bring out the files.”

These files were then projected onto a holographic screen against the wall behind Waller. It was a photo of Scarecrow.

“Some of you probably have heard. Just yesterday, Dr. Jonathan Crane released his new toxin in the National Bank of Gotham.”

The screen started to show footage of what went on in the Bank.

“Our first mistake was thinking Scarecrow had launched the same kind of toxin as the last time, but as the surviving victims were brought out to the stations, they continued to showed the side effects of the toxin, including mania, hallucinations, homicidal tendencies, unnatural human strength, and even cannibalism. Even after being held for observations for more than twenty-four hours, they, unfortunately, could not be brought back.

“Which means that Crane had finally developed a fear toxin that causes permanent effects to anyone who does so much as inhale the gas…”

She heard guards shuffle and hold their guns tighter.

“I have a question!” Harley screamed, holding her hand up despite it being strapped to the chair.

“Flag. Muffle her.”

“Muffle me!? What do you-MMMMM!”

“As I was saying. The victims were forced to be euthanized when none of the doctors could bring them back. One hundred-twenty people died in the incident and the whole country is in a state of panic.”

“MMM MMM MMM?!” Harley asked.

“Yes. The whole country. Months ago, Dr. Crane had blackmailed the crime syndicate Carmine Falcone, who he instructed to forge buy outs of several other Gotham businessmen, stole almost all their money before hiring a certain hitman-“ she stared at Y/N. “-To assassinate them all one by one before his shortcomings are detected. That placed Falcone’s total net worth to be almost two hundred billion dollars. Or so we thought.

“After Falcone’s death, Crane had already taken all the money for himself and had used to build what might be the end to all of mankind. A new Cloudburst weapon. This time large enough to engulf the whole country in his new toxin, as well as a brand-new militia army of hundreds of men guarding his device. Mankind as we know it will be haunted with his obsession with fear and we will all be nothing but goddamn zombies.”

“MMMM!” Harley thrashed about in her chair, then she spat out her gag. “Yuck! That was disgusting! I was about to say that gag had a bug and it crawled down to my throat but it actually wasn’t that bad!”

“Harley!” Rick Flag screamed. Harley pouted and stuck out her tongue.

“And what is it you want us to do, Waller?” Boomerang asked with his heavy accent. “You want us to go there and possibly inhale this bloody toxin!?”

The screen turned to a helicopter’s sight. “Last night, we managed to tracked down a dome-shaped building in the deserted areas outside New Jersey with more than five hundred men guarding it inside and out. It is suspected that the weapon might be hidden somewhere in its center. Your job is to go there, eliminate Dr. Crane and his army, and destroy that weapon with whatever means necessary.

“And as for your concern, our teams have developed a mask for you all to wear. It has the filter to go against the toxin. We found it on one of the Arkham Knight Militia’s men and developed our own.”

Oh. Shit. That. She totally forgot. Man, how time flies.

“Let’s not waste anymore time. Flag. Take them to the airport and give them their gear.”

“Weeeeee!” Harley squealed as they started wheeling her out of the room.

Y/N had no idea where to start, if she even had a place to start.

Everything Waller mentioned, it could all be traced back to her. In so many ways. And she knew it. Everyone in the room probably knew it. It was only fair that she be involved in trying to correct it at all. She had no business complaining or thinking she should be somewhere else. This was Waller’s way, hell, this was the whole goddamn world’s way of handing to her what she truly deserved. And she was so tired of constantly being the cause of hurt and pain. So many mistakes, costing her everything she’s ever known to love. She really, truly belonged here. More than Harley. More than Killer Frost. More than anyone else in the squad.

Because without her even knowing, she’d been involved in this mess before any of Scarecrow’s plans were even thought of. With the militia, the Cloudburst, Falcone’s assassinations. In so many ways, none of this would have happened if not for her.

But did she even have the time to blame herself? When it would barely do her any good?

As Y/N was taken to the plane, beside the other members of the squad, she focused on the buzzing and Boomerang’s rants and Harley’s cackles. She even caught the eye of King Shark and didn’t budge.

Because of course, in a way, she was to blame. She knew Crane had something planned when he almost had her killed that one, terrible night trying to lessen the odds of her ruining his plan once more. And another one of her stupid mistakes was to completely forget about it.

They arrived a few hours later. On the military base somewhere in the interstate, even more soldiers and guards waited for them in the barren grounds surrounded by their tents.

She was the farthest behind, the last one to be wheeled out of the plane. When Rick Flag met them at the center where suitcases and crates were being brought out. He waited until most of the squad members had settled.

“Everyone. Stand your ground. Unlock them and give them their gear. If you idiots do so much as look at me differently, I will detonate the bombs.”

“We know the drill, mate,” Boomerang spat at him.

“I know. I was talking to the new girl.”

Y/N’s wheelchair stopped. Then, they were all released from their straps, from their chairs. Harley hopped up and stretched out her arms, then took out her clothes from the crates and her enormous hammer. Boomerang fixed his coat, then he had a single boomerang from his case. He threw it in the air, and a few seconds later, it came flying back.

Killer Frost, with the air suddenly becoming a little chillier when the chamber opened, walked out and grabbed her icy-blue suit. She didn’t have any more weapons. El Diablo was slow to move, but when the chains were unlocked, he got a single hoodie jacket and hid himself from everyone else.

King Shark, on the other hand, put up most of a fight. Terrified soldiers had their shields up when they released him from his confines and he roared directly at Flag’s face. Flag didn’t budge.

Y/N stood up from her chair, stretched her neck, then cracked her knuckles.

As an entire arsenal of guns was brought to her, she stared vacantly at her red and gray suit and the white mask at the bottom of the crate.

That wasn’t her. It didn’t call out to her anymore the way it did just a few days ago. It was a layer of skin laid over her flesh that wasn’t hers at all. She wasn’t Deadshot anymore.

She can't wear this suit.

Y/N eyed another crate nearby. It must have belonged to the other gunmen in their army.

She can make something out of these.

Nobody batted an eye when she started scavenging for parts.

Black body armor, covering her chest, shoulders, and knees. Dark pants covered in straps and holsters on her hips and thighs. Boots that went up to her knees, covered with the pads. And underneath the armor was a dark blue body suit, making her look completely different from her uncle’s red one. Her wrist gun, spray painted blue. And lastly, a black hood with a mask that covered her nose and mouth.

Around her neck was a small silver chain with the diamond ring through its loop. Y/N longingly stared into its crystal, looking back at everything Jason had promised her. How she believed them even when they weren’t so possible. How much she missed him.

She stuffed it under her suit and placed the hood over her head.

Already, she’d shed off that foreign skin. This was her. This was Y/N.

When everyone was ready, Flag came up to the crowd.

“No longer Deadshot, are you?”

“No,” she said.

“Then what do we call you?”

She simpered.

“The Bullet.”

-----

This had to be all theatrics. Not to mention completely unnecessary. Jason got off his motorcycle and parked it right outside the gate.

Somehow, they kept it. Even the fence. And it still had ‘Wayne Manor’ on its wrought iron bars even when the field behind it had been completely emptied out. The ruins and everything left behind after the manor exploded had been cleared out and demolished. Still, they chose not to do anything with the land, even when millionaires fought over it and maybe a few intruders with metal detectors breaking in to look for the Batcave.

Dick told him to meet him and the rest of the family there. He had no idea where, but when he stepped into the gate, Dick was there leaning against the vine-covered fence behind it. Jason wasn’t so sure how to greet him. the last time they saw each other, they were at each other’s throats. Literally. Now at their mercy, he wasn’t so sure what was the quickest way to let his pride down without looking too much of a desperate asshole.

“Uhm. Hi,” Dick said.

“Hey.”

They stared at the grass.

“Are Babs and Tim coming?”

“Yeah. They just got out of their honeymoon.”

“Oh yeah. Congratulations to them.”

“You can tell Tim when we get to them.”

Of course. Tim. The replacement. He can totally congratulate him on his wedding without it sounding too awkward.

“We talk here?”

Dick wrinkled his forehead and laughed. “You thought we were gonna plan this whole thing out on an empty field?”

“This place sure looks like one.”

He threw his head back. “Come on. Follow me.”

Hands in his pockets, he trailed behind Dick. All the way over to the center of the field where there wasn’t so much as a porta potty for them to go into.

Then Dick pulled out his watch, which wasn’t a watch at all, and started to press onto its buttons.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Jason sighed when the ground underneath them suddenly started to rumble.

“What? You thought the cave went out with the explosion, too? Bruce wouldn’t let it go to waste.”

Then the grass, which turned out to be fake, had split into a large, rectangular shaped ramp that slowly descended down onto the undergrounds for them to walk onto. When it stopped, Jason pressed on his nose. “I can't believe I didn’t know about this.”

“Come on.”

They started walking down. “Barbara’s the one in charge. She practically runs the place.”

“I can see that.”

When they reached below ground, the Batcave was exactly as they had left it. The last time he was here, he was with Y/N, the Commander. And although they’d changed its entryway, the Batmobile and the Batwing were still there, the computers were still up and running. How massive it was and how bats were still up on the rocky ceiling looking down on them with their beady little eyes. Jason and Dick walked down the driveway and he let his hand run onto the batmobile’s surface.

Barbara and Tim were at the computers. They turned to the two and the way they looked at Jason wasn’t something he particularly liked being stared at.

“Hey, Babs.”

Barbara was the first to smile at him. “Hi, Jason.”

Then when he looked at Tim, who didn’t share the same smile, he stopped himself from scratching an itch on his head.

“Hi… Tim…”

“Jason…” he coughed.

“Congratulations, by the way.”

“Thank you,” Babs said, then she reached out to Jason’s hand. He took it, for a while, then he pulled away.

“Sorry to hear about her,” Tim said.

“I know. But if you help me… and I thank you for helping me now… we can break her out.”

“Did you come up with a plan?” Dick asked him. Jason, arms crossed, turned over to the computer. Barbara had already gone ahead with looking up Scarecrow.

“If the squad is being sent out to deal with Crane, they might be going after that new weapon of his. We can go after them there and get her out before anyone sees.”

He stared at his hands. “I was hoping Babs could come up with some sort of devise that can disable the bomb in her neck.”

“Dick already told me. Don’t worry. I came up with something this morning.”

The three men followed behind her as she wheeled over to the table next to the keyboards.

“This,” she held out a device shaped like a thick pen. “If you can get her to settle down, you stick this thing to the back of her neck and it will send shocks right up to the nanite bomb. It should give it the voltage it needs to be disabled. It’s going to hurt. But it can save her.”

She was an angel. A literal angel. Just the thought of it gave him that little flutter of hope he definitely needed.

“Babs, I don’t know how to thank you…”

“Don’t worry about it. We’re here to help you.”

Two years ago, he had this woman kidnapped and sent to Crane, gave her the death scare of a lifetime and almost had Tim killed when Scarecrow had him captured.

It was too much. How none of their faces looked the least bit bothered. Dick held the pen and took off the needle cap, flinching, then he gave it to Jason.

Jason looked down on it, clearing his throat.

“I’m sorry…”

Dick, with his arms crossed, Tim leaning against the table, and Babs looking down at her hands, they all didn’t have much to say.

“I’m sorry for everything I did to you. All of you.”

“Jason…” Dick rubbed the back of his neck. “We used to be brothers-“

“No, I… I couldn’t. When this is over, I’ll be out of your way. And I owe you. All of you… But I shouldn’t stay…”

“You can. And you will. No matter how much you push yourself away… We’re here for you…”

Tim never looked up. But Jason knew, that if he were in his place right now, he’d be all over him with the ‘I told you so’s’ and the snide remarks. But the younger man was silent, didn’t even look at him the wrong way.

And that’s when he really felt like shit.

“We’re happy you came to us for help,” Babs said.

Jason hadn’t figured this part out when he reached for their help, but he knew something like this was about to happen. It was the entire reason why he didn’t want to. Because somehow, when it did, these guys won't hate him anymore, and he’ll end up hating himself instead.

Dick placed his hand on his shoulder. For a moment. Then when Jason’s body tensed, Dick pulled away.

“Now,” Babs went over to the computer. “Time to hack into the government.”

-----

The helicopter landed some distance away from the dome. The Bullet still had no idea why it was shaped that way. Just that it was new and humungous and completely littered with army men guarding every inch of it.

She, Harley, Boomerang, Killer Frost, King Shark, and El Diablo stepped out at the front lines, with Rick Flag right behind them, followed by their own army of men, though a number considerably less than what they were going up against. They had to be smart with this and break in.

They went into the forest, out on the fields. The dome was in a level ground lower than the lands around it, shaped in a circle, much like it was on a pit that was about two or three stories below ground. They crouched down on the bushes when they started reaching the edges of the pit and Flag looked out on his scopes.

“They’ve completely covered the perimeter.”

“Do we just attack?”

Flag put down his binoculars. “We are. To keep them distracted. When everyone’s backs are turned you six go in there and finish the job.”

“You say it like it’s so fucking easy,” Boomerang snarled. King Shark gritted his sharp teeth and growled staring at the armed men around the building.

A hand grenade. Right at one of the trees. It got their attention enough, especially when Flag started firing at the guards stationed just outside the entrance. Crowds of Scarecrow’s men, armed to the teeth, ran the outside grounds to go after Flag’s men. They drifted down the pit, outstretched their legs, and handled them at close range, while some stayed at the trees firing from afar.

The Squad, on the other hand, were all the way over to the other side. Almost all of them had ran off, except for two who stayed behind guarding the backside.

“Bullet,” Frost placed her frosted hand on her shoulder. It made her shiver. “You're up.”

The Bullet took out her sniper and shot down those two men almost at the same time. Then they slid down the side, King Shark rolling down with his immense weight. When another of Scarecrow’s men ran out the door, a boomerang landed on his head.

The door was locked. “I’ll take care of it,” Frost said. Boomerang scoffed, “Fucking metas.”

Holding out her hands, fumes of ice shot out from Frost’s palms and froze down the locks. King Shark kicked the iced hinges down, then the door fell to the ground.

“That was easy!” Harley skipped inside with her mallet over her shoulders. Diablo was still silent, still with his hands in his pockets.

“Don’t jinx it, Harls.”

It looked more like a warehouse by the entryway. And there was absolutely nothing inside save for a few cylinders and water tanks and a whole lot of pipes being guarded.

“We should probably sneak inside.”

“Sneak!?” Harley snorted at the Bullet. “Honey, we don’t do that here.”

King Shark growled at her, then he walked straight up to the center of the room.

“Intruder! Open fire!” the soldiers screamed.

“What is that thing!?”

“Just shoot!”

King Shark walked slowly towards those men, and the bullets just bounced off his incredibly thick skin. He held out his hand, stopped the bullets from reaching his face. Then when the soldiers had backed too much away and reached the wall, Shark grabbed them by the face and actually hurled them all the way across the room.

“Time to play!!!” Harley screamed, then she held out her mallet and started swinging it over at the guards.

Killer Frost had the ground frozen over, slipping the guards off balance, then shards of ice rose up from the ground to impale them. Boomerang had a more melee approach but had his trusty weapon to go around when he needed it.

The Bullet. The new, almighty Bullet. She pulled up her hood and mask and took out her AK.

She fired at the dozens of men going after her. Jumping on top of the cylinders, standing on the highest ground, she shot down anyone who came remotely close to her and had their bodies on the floor before they could even touch her feet. Over and over, she changed the magazines, took out more ammo. She let the gun take charge of her hands and head. A lot of the were swarming her, from different directions. Eventually too many of the soldiers were surrounding the pile of crates she stood on and the others started climbing up.

She couldn’t escape. Even if she were able to take them all down.

Until a raging fire shot out like a car-sized flame thrower and took out the guards that were climbing up. The water tank didn’t seem to have been damaged, but the men on it were burnt like a crisp, and they all started to run away. “Jump!” Diablo screamed.

She did, and she landed on the fire as well. She rolled on the floor to put it out before it got to her skin and Diablo helped her up. “Thank you.”

“Just go.”

She nodded, then with her pistol and wrist gun, went on to keep firing.  Frost had a wall of the men being stuck to the block of ice, some completely frozen inside it, then King Shark let out an animalistic shriek before he punched the glass, destroying it into shards and impaling everyone inside.

Harley, on the other hand, just went on spinning around with her mallet, screaming, manically laughing. The bitch was insane.

“A little help here!” Boomerang called out. He was being held back by two men while another was punching at his chest. The Bullet pointed her wrist gun and fired at his attacker.

Even more men were coming. From the doors to the inside.

“We have to keep moving!” The Bullet cried out to them. To the door where the reinforcements kept coming from, she kept firing as she backed away. The whole squad moved, onwards towards the door. Then when they’d all reached it, Frost froze over the door with more than five layers of ice.

There were sounds of bashing and hitting against the icy door, but it should be enough to hold them back. Before them was a long, seemingly endless hallway. It should probably be leading them to the inside of the dome, where the weapon is.

“Ahhh. The Suicide Squad…”

“WOAH WOAH WOAH where the hell is that comin’ from!?” Harley screamed.

The intercoms. Scarecrow was watching them. The Bullet put on her optics, now shining blue light, and looked around.

A camera. Right at the corner. She shot it with her wrist gun.

“And you have the Commander with you.”

“FUCKING SHUT UP!” The Bullet shot another camera hidden away.

“The Commander, huh,” Killer Frost looking at her head to toe. “You work with him before?”

“Shut up.”

“OH MY MOLLY,” Harley placed her hands on her mouth. “YOU'RE the Commander of the freakin’ Arkham Knight!! I remember you!”

“We should go-“

“I have so many questions. Huge fan. HUGE fan. Ya know she’s drove the first Cloudburst?”

Boomerang crossed his arms. “And they sent her to help us? The fuckin’ nerve of this scumbag coming up here actin’ all hero.”

“You watch your mouth, kangaroo.”

Diablo snorted and chuckled. Boomerang held out his weapon. “You want a piece of this?”

“A kid’s toy?”

“Don’t you fuckin-“

King Shark roared at the two with his mouth wide open for a good ten seconds and deafened their ears. The Bullet wiped his spit off her face and scoffed.

Frost led the way, all the way down its halls. When they reached a large gate, she froze it over once more and Shark beat it down with his fists and his foot.

They didn’t know they’d reach the center of the large dome. They thought they had more rooms to cover.

With the building so big, they thought it would have taken so much more time to reach the core.

But already, they were met with a cylindrical glass tank that was almost as thick as an entire building in itself, and it lit up the room in a menacing red light, all around. It was swirling, even boiling inside. And it shot all the way up to the roof, three stories high.

It was the fucking toxin.

The squad backed away.

Dozens of men surrounded them, all around the dimly lit room. And it was larger than any of them could have expected. It was circular, and there was only a suspended walkway that went all around the sides. There was a runway to the center, where there were controls. A man stood by them. A man with a rag on his head.  

All of them with their hands up.

Scarecrow’s voice was on the intercom, and it echoed all throughout the dome loud enough to rattle their eardrums.

“I assume this wasn’t what you’d expected?”

No. Not even a little. This wasn’t what they expected at all.

They didn’t expect to already reach the weapon.

Or rather. Stand on top of the weapon.

The weapon wasn’t a ray gun or a tank or even a satellite. It wasn’t something so small that it would have been easily taken down by a tank or even King Shark’s fist. Even when it was to engulf the whole of America in its toxin.

No. it was none of that.

The Bullet trailed her eyes down the numerous pipes going up and around the walls, through the floor and over to the room where they just came from, where even more of the toxin was stored in tanks and the pipes that went around it.

The Cloudburst wasn’t inside the dome.

The Cloudburst was the dome.

-----

It didn’t take too much time. It wasn’t the first time Barbara had to hack into the American Government. In fact, it was the easier to hack into than some people’s private accounts.

She went into Amanda Waller’s files.

“Here. Finally.”

Dick, Jason, and Tim stood behind her.

“It looks like they’ve already sent out the squad. Just a few hours ago.”

“Who are in the squad?”

The files on Task Force X. Babs took out the profiles on all their subjects.

Harley’s picture was first to come up. Her blonde hair and vicious eyes staring at the screen. “Harley Quinn, of course. We got Louise Lincoln, also known as Killer Frost.”

The boys watched on.

“El Diablo. Captain Boomerang. King Shark. Rick Flag’s being sent out there as well.”

Then she stopped scrolling when Y/N’s picture and profile came up.

Jason’s heart broke. It did every time he does so much as look at a photo of her. And with that one, a mug shot, the mug shot that was going around every news station in town, the brokenness in her face, the darkness in what used to be the brightness in her eyes, how much rage she had for everything around the world, he hitched his breath.

‘Y/FN Y/LN

Age: 23

Alias: The Bullet’

He smiled at her new name. A sad smile. The most painful kind.

He missed her so much.

Setting his head to the side so they couldn’t see the tear that had seeped out, Jason swallowed and shut his eyes.

“Jason…”

“I’m alright. Can you find out where they were headed?”

Babs smiled at him, then went back to her keyboard.

Zooming in on the helicopter footage on the dome, she traced its coordinates.

“Is that-“

“Scarecrow’s base? Most probably.”

“Jesus,” Jason sighed. “I used to work with that guy.”

“This is the weapon, alright. The sensors are through the roof. We should be heading out there.”

“Do we have a plan?”

“Not exactly. We’ll know when we get there,” Dick said.

“We have to hurry. Who knows when that mad man actually detonates his bomb?”

“How? It’s two hours away.”

“Man,” Dick pat his back. “You really have to get used to working with us now that we’ve got Bruce’s old toys.”

Of course.

What else could he have possibly thought? Get there on his bike?

The Batwing was staring right at their faces, almost taunting them with its silent growl. Dick, Tim, and Jason walked up to it side by side.

“You think he’ll be happy with that?” Jason said.

“Not at all. He even threatens to kill us if we get anywhere near the wheel-“

“Which is why I’m here to drive, Master Dick.”

No.

No.

It couldn’t be.

The sweet old butler, came up from behind the computers where there must have been a room for him to stay in, he held out a tray of four glasses of water for them to take. Setting it down on the table, he gave Jason the sincerest smile.

“I’ve missed you, dear boy.”

“Alfred.”

He wanted desperately to go up to him, give him the biggest bear hug until his bones crack, but Alfred held his hand up to him and just handed him his water.

“It’s better if we skip the ol’ reunion. We catch up after we’ve saved your girl.”

Everything was here. Everyone was here.

Clearly, it wasn’t the time to get emotional. And goddamn, he wasn’t the one to get emotional.

And all the more did they look like a family when the three boys suited up. Dick with his black and blue Nightwing suit and domino mask, Tim with his bo staff and red and yellow suit and cape. And Jason, with his hooded jacket and red visor.

Facing each other in a circle, Nightwing, Robin, and Red Hood took in how they were all now in one team, possibly for the rest of their career. No longer will they fight. No longer will they run.

Oracle smiled at the three. “You all look great together when you're not at each other’s throats.”

“You sure you won't let me drive, Alfred?” Robin said to the butler.

“I had specific instructions from Master Bruce that if you were to inherit the cave, no one was to drive the Batwing but me. You have until I die, Master Dick.”

“Awe. Even in his death, Bruce still doesn’t trust us.”

Laughing as they went in, Alfred had the Batwing soaring into the sky. Silently.

They were going to save her. Them. His family. The one he’d left. The one he thought he hated. The one he almost got killed.

He couldn’t possibly have done anything to deserve this.

With his visor up, he went up to Dick.

“Dick…” he choked.

His older brother turned to him, smiling. He knew what Jason was thinking.

And he didn’t let him speak to make things unnecessarily dramatic. He knew he had his brother back. Dick pulled him into a hug. A sweet, sincere hug that tore out every part of him that wasn’t already consumed by that string of humanity he once had left inside him.

“Thank you,” Jason said to him. Dick patted his back.

“We missed you, Jaybird…”

Jason closed his eyes.

When they pulled away, with Tim watching, he never actually got the change to get to know him. But one of these days, he will. And he’ll be a brother to him, too.

Jason nodded at him, smiling. Tim nodded back.

He never, ever would have thought they’d accept him like this, to help him like this.

And if Bruce were here, he’d have no idea what to tell him. But Jason did forgive him. He forgave him before he even knew he did. Maybe, if Bruce were anything like Dick and Tim, he would have accepted Jason back into his house. He would have helped him, as well.

He let himself think that. For his own sake. For his own peace.  

Not long after, they reached the site.

Nightwing, Robin, and Red Hood stood at the Batwing’s exit doors.

-----

Harley must have had the worst of issues for her to be laughing this off, whistling as she marveled over the room. “I have to admit, Ragdoll, you cer’ainly out did yourself than the last time! I remember when all it took was Ivy’s tree to get rid of your toxin!”

Boomerang scoffed. “A tree?!”

“Gag her.”

“Awe, come on! What is it with you people and the gaggi- MMMMMM!”

Held back by a dozen of Scarecrow’s gunmen, with so many of their guns pointed right at their heads, they stood on their knees, hands tied to their backs. They watched Scarecrow walk over to them from his place near the glass. He chuckled, that low, dark, breathy, and utterly disgusting laugh when he went over the squad.

“MMM! MMM? Mmm…” Harley said to him when he passed by her. All he did was glare. When he passed by Frost, he eyed her body and how icy smoke was coming out of her pores.

“Ya know, this ain’t personal. I’d totally be into this. But we got an explosive stuck to me spine here, mate, and I really just don’t want to die,” Boomerang said. Scarecrow ignored him and walked over to Diablo.

She looked over. Diablo had melted away the ropes on his wrists and no one even noticed. He stood still, watching Scarecrow, then the rag-headed man went over to the next one.

The Bullet. The only one who actually hated this man to the bloody core.

Scarecrow looked amused at the darkness of her glower. He leaned over, pulled down her hood and mask with his disgusting fingers before she flinched away.

“Lovely to see you once more, Commander.”

“Don’t fucking call me that.”

“I thought I left you for dead. Turns out you survived your own bullets. Perhaps you're not as good as you thought you are-“

“Go to hell-“

“This is hell, Commander. At least, it will be.” When he stood back, he eyed the creature next to her.

“An animal? They brought an animal to the squad?” Scarecrow laughed.

King Shark roared. The loudest, more nightmarish roar. Then he charged after him with his large mouth littered with almost three rows of teeth on each side. The guards pulled him back, shot a taser to his arm, but it didn’t do much damage.

Scarecrow backed off and immediately he was guarded by his men.

“Kill him.”

“No!” Killer Frost screamed, but even she was held back by three guards.

And it was the most cruel thing they’ve ever seen. The Bullet watched on, as her fellow squad member was shot with three tranquilizer darts. He fell to the ground, unconscious.

Then Scarecrow’s men took out a grenade.

Shit.

They stuffed it into King Shark’s mouth.

And the squad looked away when it detonated not even two seconds later.

His head was blown off. Much like it would have been if Flag had done it himself.

Five of them left.

Against an army of hundreds.

“Now. You all get to watch as the entire country slowly descends into their deepest, darkest nightmares…”

Scarecrow went over to the center, over to the controls where she saw a bright, beeping light coming from one of the screens. She didn’t have so much as an idea about how this was going to blow. Will the building be going along with it? Is everyone going to live through it?

She should know. She was the one who detonated the first Cloudburst.

They were two hours away from the city. And the government already had most of the people in the area evacuate to shelters underground. They didn’t have much else to hide.

The guards around them had masks as well. They were going to sit it through, fight even with the gas all around them.

She had no idea what was going to happen. But all she could do was sit and watch.

Scarecrow pressed the final button, and on the screen, it showed a minute’s countdown

The Bullet closed her eyes.

There was a heat coming to her wrists. Out of view from the guards. A little flame, floating about. It melted away the chains that were around their hands, and suddenly, she could move them around. She looked over at Diablo and thanked him with a nod. Harley and Boomerang were free as well. Frost, on the other hand, rejected that fire and instead froze over the chains herself. They could charge.

But the guards were too many. She couldn’t just attack.

Time was running out. There was nothing they could do.

But they can shield themselves. At the last second when the guards couldn’t react.

“This is… the Cloudburst!!!”

Three.

Two.

One.

BOOM!!!

“EVERYBODY, GET YOUR FUCKING MASKS!” Boomerang screamed. The five of them grabbed their filter masks from their suits and held it against their mouths. Everything was shaking, an explosion large enough to almost take down its walls, then the glass started to break. The gas was leaking on the inside.

Scarecrow didn’t move. He just stood there, amused, all the while his guards started to panic, panting and coughing and tearing the masks off their faces like it only hurt their skin. She ran out of the way before a guard fell to her body, clutching his throat, before he started screaming the ghostliest noises a human could possibly make.

Then their skins. No longer did they look remotely human. They looked like they were burnt out. Their whole body turning into scabs and burnt flesh. The toxin was eating them from the inside. And their eyes. She’s never seen the look on someone’s face like that when they were looking straight at their deepest, darkest fears. Not even when she’d imagine it.

No.

He couldn’t possibly-

No.

These men. These trained soldiers promised with almost million dollars each.

Scarecrow didn’t hire them here to defend the Cloudburst.

They were here to serve as victims for his horrible toxin that turned them into vicious, mindless zombies. And they looked exactly like they would have in their visions of fear, the ones you’d merely hallucinate with his old toxin. This time, they weren’t hallucinations. The nightmarish creatures of the dark, Scarecrow had turned the people’s fears into something real.

The squad, with their masks on, held tightly onto their weapons, watching the horror in front of them unfold.

One of the creatures ran after Harley, so she swung at it with her mallet, crushing his body against the wall. It didn’t even look like it had human bones that cracked when it was hit.

No. No. No.

Everyone started firing at the creatures coming after them. At their heads, at their animalistic mouths. Frost on one side, freezing the incoming animals into an ice block, and on the other, El Diablo, firing at them with an enormous raging fire. They had to get out of here. There was no possible way they could win this here. Not with the Cloudburst looking like it was about to break.

The Bullet fired at everything she could see. With her AK on one hand and her pistol on the other. But the seemingly endless array of lifeless minions came crawling and pouncing right at her. One of them scratched her arm. She hoped this fucking toxin didn’t work through cross contamination.

Scarecrow, he was still at the center, watching it all unfold.

Scarecrow.

Scarecrow.

Fucking Scarecrow.

The Bullet screamed out, even with her mask, then opened fire as she made her way into the center walkway. She ran to him and pushed everything out of her way, blowing their brains out, jumping onto the railing and running on top of it. She took out a grenade and threw it at a crowd.

Jonathan Crane caught her eye. And with the deathly look on her face, he lost his amusement.

Then the coward started to back away.

She growled and tore through everything, running after Crane. He didn’t have much else to go.

So in a split second, she fired at his leg. The Bullet could have easily fired at his head.

But she wanted him to die from a bullet right between his eyes, that were to look right into hers in the last few moments of his life.

Scarecrow was on the ground, crawling. The Bullet walked right up to him and grabbed him by the collar. Then she aggressively slammed him against the glass where his horrible red toxin was leaking out.

“You killed my son…”

“You did that yourself-“

“No,” she tightened her hand around his neck. “No, I didn’t.”

A pistol. Right against his head. She ends this now. His story ends now. His reign on earth. His madness. His nightmare.

She couldn’t hear the bullet fire out of her hand.

But she did feel the blood spatter when it entered Jonathan Crane’s skull. She heard the crack, and the impact against the glass. She saw the look on his eyes, staring right into her. Taunting her. Waiting for her to pull the trigger until it stayed that way until the worms eat up his body.

The Bullet threw the body on the floor.

She was never, ever going to kill another human being again. She made that promise. To Jason and his family.

But if she were to kill just one last time…

She wanted to make it count.

-----

“Holy…”

“Shit…”

“We were too late.”

“Or the squad failed…”

“No,” Red Hood choked. “No, they can't be dead.”

“They might still be alive. Get your masks on. Come on.”

They put on their masks, Red Hood’s under his visor. As they ran towards the enormous mushroom-shaped cloud of smoke that was spewing violently out of the dome. The ground was quaking enough to feel like it would eventually erupt. And if they were to stay, it might actually split open. They ran towards the center.

And before they could go down the pit. They saw them. Right when they stepped into the are completely engulfed in the horrible red toxin.

They saw the creatures.

In army uniforms of what used to be humans, the creatures were screaming, running and clawing their way around the grass and bushes like they were rabid wolves under a full moon. The bodies, or what used to be bodies, looked like undead carcasses that were walking on their hands and feet. When they caught sight of the three, they started going after them.

Someone grabbed Nightwing’s shoulder.

Rick fucking Flag. He had a mask on.

“You kids better stay away. This is our mission.”

“You really want your boss’s goddamn pride to get in the way of actually saving the world? We’re here to help!”

Flag fired at one of the monsters coming right for them.

“Scarecrow’s baited his own men and turned them into these fucking shitbags.”

“Then let us help,” Robin said. Red Hood, on the other hand, was already shooting at the creatures with his two pistols.

“Red Hood!”

“Oh, don’t give me that! These guys aren’t human!” He fired at one almost flying for his visor. “They never will be again even if we destroy this thing! So get your asses here and KILL THESE GUYS!”

Rick Flag had went on to shoot them with his AK. Nightwing and Robin stared at each other, holding onto their escrima sticks and bo staff.

Flag, despite his guns, didn’t see one of the zombie-like monsters that had grabbed him from behind. It started tearing at its face, claws sharper than a cat’s. Robin and Nightwing went over to get it off him, but it was too late.

Rick Flag’s mask had fallen off.

He stared at the two, with his eyes glowing red and bloodshot from how he was desperately trying to hold his breath. He started clutching at his throat, and his mouth looked like it was about to blow up.

Flag couldn’t handle it. He gasped for air.

Then he turned into one of them. Right in front of their eyes. Nightwing gripped on his escrima sticks.

Then he slammed it against Flag’s head, destroying what was left of his skull. The guilt started to eat him away, but Red Hood was right. He wasn’t human anymore.

“Come on,” Robin said.

Then they attacked everything that came their way. They had to go into the dome. Find the Squad. Hope for the best. But the creatures were running out of the doors like they were in need of air. Hundreds of them in a stampede going out into the field. The trees had cleared, blown off from the explosion. Everything was barren and had fallen under a thick red cloud of his fucking toxin.

Red Hood managed to run all the way to the center. He shot one that had wrestled Nightwing to the ground before he slid down the pit, hands and legs outstretched, and even then, he continued to fire. He reloaded his guns and started firing at the ones going out of the dome.

----

They couldn’t possibly take them all.

So as the Squad rushed down the hallways, out into the first level where it had gone complete barren and destroyed, El Diablo continued to shoot his flames from his hands at all the incoming creatures.

Finally, they reached the door and they all raced outside.

Frost barred the door with her ice, as much as she could, and the monsters were pounding themselves against it with their own bodies and heads. The Bullet, facing behind them, fired at the incoming creatures that must have been the reinforcements waiting to be called. Fuck, there were a lot of them.

Killer Frost couldn’t handle it and the creatures had broken her wall of ice. Unnatural strength. One of the side effects of the toxin. Harley screamed her battle cry and started swinging her mallet around. El Diablo with his flames. And Captain Boomerang with, well, his boomerang.

The Bullet, with her machine gun, fired at ten of the creatures in under a second. She flew in the air. She dodged their incoming attacks. She fired directly at their heads and took out more of them than anyone else with a gun. She fired relentlessly until their heads were blown off, their bodies exploding onto the floor.

She climbed on top of a nearby truck, dropped her carbine, then used her wrist gun and pistol to fire at everything that moved.

“WOOHOO! GO NEW GIRL!” Harley screamed. The Bullet smiled, then went on with her alternating shots until she’d taken down dozens of them.

Everything that moved. Everything that moved. Everything that-

A red hood. Red visor. Gray jacket. And a red bat symbol on his chest.

Oh God.

The asshole.

“Jason!!!”

Red Hood turned around.

A wave that had crashed on the shore, violent and forceful, a wave that tore through everything in its way. Every tree. Every bush. Every doubting thought. The Bullet jumped off the truck, ignored the sting up her knees. She ran to him. She ran to him so fast that two of the monsters smashed into each other when they were going after her. Red Hood recognized her and dropped everything he had on him and sprinted to her way.

The wave was there. A crashing, powerful wave. When they landed in each other’s arms so painfully tight she could have almost fallen over if she hadn’t already clung to him with all her might. All that was left of it.

Yes.

Yes…

Everything lit up. Everything was here again. He was everything. He will always be everything.

It was a miracle they lived through it. Red Hood, with his arms shaking as much as the ground was, buried himself into her and didn’t let go until they heard the world calling out to them, demanding that they give them their attention back. But even then, they held on. Not when they thought it could have been the last. Not after they’ve just been apart. Jason pulled away, raised his visor so she could look into his eyes. He wore a filter mask underneath. And if he could see her smile right then, she was sure he was grinning his face off as well. She could tell with the way his beautiful eyes crinkled up.

“I fucking love the suit-“

Then she held out her arm and shot one of the monsters coming for them.

“We should move.”

“Yeah.”

Side by side, having each other’s backs. She knew something felt wrong fighting with the squad. No, she didn’t belong there. She never fought as well as she possibly could when she was with her partner. Now the Bullet and Red Hood, they fired and shot at everything that came their way.

“Throw me!” She screamed at Red Hood. She run up to him, and he grabbed her legs. Red Hood flung her up at the air and she fired relentlessly at twenty creatures hidden behind the truck. She got to the ground.

Then the fucking Batwing flew in and started firing.

“Woah!” The Bullet yelled.

“How cool is our butler!?”

The monsters started running towards the Batwing, and their attentions were slowly taken away from Red Hood and Bullet. Alfred had them covered.

“We have to get that bomb off you.”

“Where’s Flag? He’ll blow up the bomb if he sees me-“

“He’s dead. He can't blow it up. But we still need to get that off of you before Waller does it herself-”

The Cloudburst dome exploded once again, this time a thicker cloud of smoke blew out of it like a bomb. They held onto the ground, eyes shut. Red Hood grabbed onto her and she swore by her life that she was never going to let go.

When it subsided, they stood back up. “Come on.”

The Bullet stared at him dumbfounded, then the Red Hood grabbed her wrist, pulled her to the back where they could find Nightwing.

“Dick!!!”

Nightwing saw them, slammed his sticks into the creature’s guts, then ran towards them.

“I found a chair at the back. She needs to sit down.”

They moved fast. Waller will find out Flag is dead and detonate all their bombs before they’ll have a chance at escaping.

So they put her into a chair, and she gripped onto the arm rests. The Bullet watched Red Hood give Nightwing a pen-shaped device that had a needle on its end. She swallowed. “Hey, hey…” Red Hood leaned in and held her face. “You're gonna be okay… Scream if you have to… It won't take too long.”

She wished she could see his face. It was the only way she could ever be comforted. But his touch was enough. She held his hand, squeezed it, then Nightwing held her neck.

“Ready.”

Alfred kept firing at all the creatures coming after them. They had a few good minutes.

Y/N screamed out into the air as the needle went into the back of her neck and electrified that one spot by her spine. She gripped onto the wood. She forced her eyes shut. She never felt so much pain from being tased down but with it came the relief feeling that bomb actually stop beeping in the inside of her flesh. The shocks were excruciatingly painful, and it made every agonizing second pass by as long as a minute would have taken. Red Hood turned his head away before the look on her face broke his heart even more.

But the moment it stopped, with her body up in light smokes, she felt everything inside her calm.

It was gone. The bomb was gone. She could actually feel it. Red Hood grabbed her and pulled her to a hug immediately.

“You're safe now…”

“I love you.”

“I love you…”

Robin suddenly jumped at them and took out three incoming creatures with his staff. “Come on guys, Alfred can't handle all this by himself!”

Nightwing. Robin. Red Hood. Bullet.

Like they were all made to fight by each other’s side.

Nightwing smashed his weapons against a monster’s head, threw its body up in the air with his knee, then the Bullet fired at it with her wrist gun all the way down to the ground. He helped her up, gain higher ground, then she fought at Nightwing’s side when he took out the ones coming for her back. Robin, with his bo staff, slammed one right at the gut and let it fly through the air until Red Hood slammed its torso with his elbow, before shooting it in the head.

Red Hood shot three with his pistols, but one of them grabbed him by the head. And man, was it inhumanely strong. Nightwing slammed his stick right through its skull, just inches away from Red Hood’s head. Red Hood elbowed it away, then shot it. The Bullet kept covering them, now with her machine gun. She fired at one going after Robin, at another that had Nightwing in a headlock, and another two that were about to surround Red Hood.

So many were coming to surround her. And as the boys fought them off, she fired at them relentlessly with her gun. She jumped to the ground and fired at them with her wrist gun.

The Batwing was above them, swerving around as it took out everything that stood their way.

The Bullet looked back out at the pit, where the squad was. “We have to help them!” she said.

“What?!” Red Hood screamed. “Are you insane?”

“They just want to live! We all want this nightmare to end! You can go back to being enemies after we’ve saved the world!”

The world. Of course. By now the gas should have dispersed out of the state. They had to move.

The Bullet shot off a creature coming for Harley. And another coming for Boomerang. The man was barely holding up. El Diablo, now a raging monster completely made of fire, tore through everything in its way and burnt down all the monsters to a bloody crisp. Frost was still holding up, doing whatever she could with her ice. And the look on her face when Nightwing came along and hit one of them in the head before it could grab her, she couldn’t describe it.

And it was that way for hours on end. The creatures kept on coming. The fires started raging. The Batwing had landed on the ground but kept its bullets spewing out of its guns in a frenzied attack against the hundreds that were still around them.

But somehow, the dome acted as some sort of beacon. Because there were more incoming. From far away. She had no idea if they were still Scarecrow’s men or if they were people from the countryside that weren’t so lucky…

As far as everybody knew, they were dead.

And they were all going after the dome like flies surrounding a light.

Frost had them in a block of ice, then Diablo fried them up like fish. Harley kept with her hammer and almost hit Nightwing in the head. “Harley!”

“Sorry, handsome! Kinda got used to aiming for your pretty head!”

Jason, standing with his back right up against the Y/N’s side. They shot at the creatures with their guns not knowing if their ammo was going to take it.

“Y/N! You think we’re gonna make this!?”

She shot down a foot, an arm, then eventually a head. Y/N screamed. “It’s not looking good but I sure fucking hope so!”

Red Hood grabbed her shoulder and turned her around, firing at one she didn’t see. Y/N got a circular lid off one of the manholes and flung it into three bodies.

“Y/N! MARRY ME!!!”

She could have been grabbed by the head if she didn’t hear it coming from behind. She held out her wrist gun and fired directly behind her.

“I THINK I’VE ALREADY ANSWERED THAT QUESTION!!!”

Y/N used Jason’s body to haul herself up, swinging her leg in a circle around her before she shot all of them on the ground. Jason grabbed a creature’s head with his bare hands and squished it into its bloody bits.

“NO. I MEAN MARRY ME. RIGHT NOW!!!!”

“WHAT?!”

Almost losing her arm, she slammed her fist against its head, throwing it to the grass and slamming her boot onto its face. Jason kept firing with his two guns, faster than he ever could have fired.

“IF WE’RE GONNA DIE, WE’RE DYING TOGETHER!!”

“WHAT?!?!”

Jason grabbed her arms, flung her around him so she could repeatedly kick them down before they got anywhere near them. She fired her wrist gun and cursed when she almost missed. He started handling them by hand, punching, swerving, kicking them down with his awfully strong thighs.

“YOU EVER SEEN PIRATES OF THE CARRIBEAN!?” He smashed drove his gun into a skull and kicked him off. “THE THIRD ONE???”

“JASON, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!!??”

Y/N pressed her back against Jason, and they didn’t stop firing.

“THEY GOT MARRIED IN THE MIDDLE OF A FIGHT. IT WAS FUCKING EPIC.”

“WE’RE GOING TO FUCKING DIE-“

“EXACTLY MY POINT. I WANT TO GET OUT OF THIS WITH YOU AS MY WIFE. DEAD OR ALIVE. I DON’T WANNA WASTE ANYMORE TIME.”

She leapt up in a backflip over Jason and they switched places.

“THIS NEVER WOULD HAVE HAPPENED IF WALLER COULDN’T LEGALLY FORCE ME TO TESTIFY AGAINST YOU. I’M NOT ABOUT TO LET THAT HAPPEN AGAIN. IF ANYONE WANTS TO KEEP US APART, THEY’LL HAVE TO GO THROUGH THE FUCKING LAW!”

“JASON, YOU'RE INSANE!!!”

Five down in a single shot. Y/N kicked them down, grabbed her grappling gun, then shot it at a crate to haul it over to the monsters incoming. Jason went through the whole row of creatures climbing down the pit, and when he had the slightest window, he raised his visor.

“IS THAT A YES?!”

Y/N faced him. and Jason faced her.

It wasn’t even a fucking question. The beautiful asshole.

“YES!”

As they kept firing, Jason pressed on his communicator. “ALFRED!!!”

He tossed Y/N a communicator so they’d both be able to hear him. The butler was still in the batwing, needless to say still firing at all the monsters that have made a mountain coming after it hovering in the air.

“Yes, sir?”

“YOU STILL AN ORDAINED MINISTER?!”

He could hear Alfred sound confused.

“I do believe that is a lifelong thing-“

“MARRY US. RIGHT NOW!!!”

Alfred took out a bazooka gun on the Batwing, a new one no doubt. He didn’t remember Bruce having that when he was still alive, then stook out a crowd of twenty coming after him.

“I’m afraid I’m rather busy at the moment, Master Jason.”

“THEN MAKE IT QUICK. PLEASE, MARRY US!”

“TIM, YOU HEARING THIS?” Dick cried out into the comms. Everyone could hear it.

“I KNOW. IT’S FUCKING ROMANTIC.”

Alfred kept his calm. Then they heard a sigh.

“Alright. Do try not to get yourselves killed, Master Jason.”

“CAN DO!”

Y/N grabbed Jason’s arm, held onto him as tightly as she could, then they turned to meet each other’s eyes. Not after shooting a zombie coming for his back.

“Dearly beloved we are gathered here today…” Alfred fired another bazooka at the crowd. “To join this man, and this woman, in holy matrimony.”

Her wrist gun on a frenzy, she shot at the surrounding monsters and helped Jason kick one down with his knee. They stuck to each other’s backs, firing with their pistols.

“Jason Todd, Red Hood, do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?”

Jason’s pistol ran out of ammo, so Y/N threw him a magazine.

“I DO!!!”

She grabbed him, hurled him to the side so they’d switch places, then she started firing at a gun powder barrel she found and it immediately exploded.

“Y/FN Y/LN, Deadsh-“

“THE BULLET! I’M THE BULLET!”

Jason smiled at her with his eyes.

“Ah yes, I do apologize. Y/FN Y/LN, the Bullet, do you take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband?”

Alfred fired at the creatures coming up to her just as she spoke. “I DO!”

Endless bullets, flying out of their hands, they fired at everything that came their way, protecting each other, shielding each other from harm’s way.

Alfred cleared his throat.

“Then with the power vested in me by the city of Gotham, I now pronounce you husband and wife.”

“DICK, COVER US!”

“I GOT YOU!” Dick screamed.

“You may now kiss the bride…”

Before they’d die. Before it all ends.

They only had a minute before their lungs would give out.

So they ran into each other’s arms, taking off their masks and held their breaths to the best capacity.

Jason grabbed Y/N’s face, pulling her to his lips. Then an explosion happened in the far-off distance that blew off almost everything around them in the air. All except them.

They were one. They were together. Forever. She was his. And he was hers. For as long as they both shall live.

“IS THIS A FUCKIN’ WEDDING?!” Boomerang screamed.

Harley smashed her hammer. “I LOVE WEDDINGS!!!”

Jason leaned down and kissed her despite his chest starting to twist. She grabbed the back of his neck, pushed him back as well. Never has a kiss been more powerful, more meaningful. As far as they knew, they were alone. They were themselves. They were together. And nothing, not even the world, was ever going to pull them apart ever again.

From their first kiss in the meeting room, to the one at the Batcave, to the kiss in her quarters that one rainy night, to the kiss they shared up on that bridge. Everything had boiled down to now. Finally. Finally.

They were fucking married.

They pulled away, stared at each other, and finally they could see the largest smiles on their faces. The places the masks back on and gasped to breathe.

“Shall we?”

“We shall…”

Not a lot more to cover. The fucking monsters were finally starting to run out. And they moved in a dance only they knew. On each other’s side. Never leaving.

They shot, kicked, slammed, tore through the lifeless bodies coming after them and she cried out as another bomb exploded that she threw from her hand. She fought with her fucking husband and man, did it sound like the most beautiful thing in the world.

Nightwing and Robin came up to them.

“CONGRATULATIONS!!!” they both screamed.

“THANK YOU!”

Then Y/N handed them both guns and they started firing at the creatures.

It worked so well.

Finally.

Twenty left. Then there were fifteen. Then another ten died.

Finally.

Gone. All of the monsters. Wiped out.

The Squad was intact. Thankfully, they smiled at the Bullet and they all gathered to the center.

“I can't believe this,” Nightwing said. “But thank you for having our backs.”

“Don’t get used to it, pretty boy, when we wake up tomorrow mornin’ I’m back to slicing your head off with a-“

“Okay,” Red Hood stopped them. “Now we have to figure out a way to stop this.” He pointed up at the beacon.

“Hood,” the Bullet gulped.

“Yes, wife?”

A few of them groaned at that. Red Hood ignored them.

But the Bullet, Y/N, she didn’t look to happy.

She was staring right up at the top of the pit, shivering.

Everyone looked back to what she was looking at.

No.

No…

It wasn’t possible.

Hundreds more. Hundreds of the creatures. From all over the city. Ones with long, blonde hair. Ones that were as tiny as a small child.

It had reached civilization.

No. they couldn’t possibly handle all of them.

Robin looked at Nightwing, whose look on his eyes definitely lost that glimmering enthusiasm that sparked the hope they needed to go on.

And Red Hood.

Well, he made the right choice marrying her.

Jason held Y/N’s hand, and she took it so tightly between her fingers.

The look on their eyes, watching each other, memorizing the looks on their eyes before they go on to their inevitable deaths.

They couldn’t even see each other’s faces.

Harley slumped to the ground. “Well, this is it, ladies and gents.”

Frost screamed in frustration, releasing a large block of ice and slamming it onto the pit.

The monsters had surrounded them now. All in a complete circle. Trapping them.

And they took their time watching them squirm like worms in a tank full of fish.

This is how they die.

Y/N tightened her grip on Jason’s hand when one of the monsters roared and they all started crawling down to the dome.

“T-Tim?”

Their communicators. It sounded like Barbara.

“Yeah?”

“I hope you weren’t saving that favor for anything special,” Oracle said.

“Favor?”

“You know. That favor with Bruce’s friends…”

“What do you mea-“

Like a lightning bolt striking a tree, their eyes shot up at the brightest flash of light.

A golden, glimmering lasso, coming down from something they hadn’t seen flying in the air. The lasso grabbed onto five of the incoming beings and hauled them up.

Y/N’s never seen her up close.

But goddamn, she was nothing like the pictures.

Wonder Woman slammed against the ground on her knee and her balled up fist, letting the soil ripple at her impact. She didn’t have on a mask, but it barely wrinkled her nose. Her striking beauty was made even more obvious when she smirked up at the four, standing up, then took out her shield and sword from her back. She winked at them.

The four were too dumbfounded to move. As victims exhausted or as fanboys and fangirls watching it all unfold right in front of their eyes. Boom tubes coming from different parts in the air, and out of those circles came the heroes they’ve looked up to their whole lives.

Superman tore through a whole row of that were crawling after them with his powerful laser vision, flying through the sky faster than any of Y/N’s bullets could speed through. He grabbed one by the head, flew up to the sky, then threw it against the ground so hard that dozens of others blew up along with it.

Green Lantern made his own machine gun with his ring. He fired at everything that came close to the dome.

The Flash couldn’t even be seen. All they could see was a buzzing red light, powering all around them in circles and taking down everything that was in his path.

Green Arrow started raining down more than five arrows at a time. Ones from above. Ones from the ground. Black Canary ran up from behind them and let out that famous ear-piercing scream that took out everything that was in front of her. Even the grass.

Aquaman came up with his trident, and with Mera following behind, she let a stream of water pierce through the air like shards and a fucking shark was in it eating the heads of everything the water passed through.

Hawkgirl held her mace up in front of her and let her wings force her through the hundreds in the crowd, smashing their brains out with a single hit.

Shazam slammed on the ground, with sparks coming out of his body, then he screamed at the sky and let the biggest lightning bolt they’ve ever seen clear out a whole patch of the land the beings were standing on.

Martian Manhunter transformed into his true alien form then grabbed the monsters with his bare hands, threw them out of the way, and stomped on them with his feet. Or what looked like feet.

Cyborg. Supergirl. Zatanna. Doctor Fate. Huntress. Hawkman. Vixen. The Atom.

They were all here.

They were all going to live.

The fucking Justice League had come to save them.

Never have they seen them all in action. To them, it might have just been another day. But to them? To Batman’s wards. It was everything they ever wished to become.

It was the best, most beautiful thing they could possibly see their whole lives.

Bruce. How much he would have loved this.

Then the ground started to shake once again. The Cloudburst. It let out another load of the toxin.

They had to destroy it now.

Alfred hovered the Batwing above them and opened up the entry way. He waved his hands for them to come in. Robin, Nightwing, Red Hood, and Bullet ran into the Batwing and took their masks off.

“We can't just run off.”

“We have to go help them.”

“Actually,” Alfred said. “I’ve taken instruction from Ms. Prince.”

“She wanted us to leave?”

“No.” Alfred lead them to the windows and the looked out.

Superman, Green Lantern, Cyborg, and Supergirl were all facing the top of the dome, firing their lasers at the concentrated spot at the center. The heart of the Cloudburst. The whole building had gone up in flames, but it continued to fire up in the toxin.

“The Batwing has one more rocket bomb in its ammunition. When the League has the Cloudburst’s core exposed, we only have one shot at firing right at its center, destroying the Cloudburst for good.”

“I’ll do it,” Dick said.

“No I will!” Tim cried.

“Who said it was your turn!?”

“Who said it was yours?!”

“This isn’t a fucking argument, this is the world’s fate in our hands!”

“Exactly, which means I get to fire the Batwing.”

“Well, who exactly has the best aim in this fucking ship-“

Every pair of eyes stopped wandering around. Then they turned to the woman they called the Bullet.

No.

Fucking no.

“I can't-“

“Y/N-“

“Jason, I can't do this-“

“You can.”

“I don’t trust myself-“

“You never miss-“

“Jason.”

She grabbed his hands that were holding her face, finally she could look up at his eyes and see his lips in a smile.

“The last time I handled a tank, it was the Cloudburst… and I missed.”

“It doesn’t matter. That wasn’t your fault. You have no idea how sorry I am for being upset at that, but I know you can do this. Besides, this isn’t a tank. This is the fucking Batwing.”

“Jay…”

“Please. You're the only one who can do this.”

“I’ve never handled anything like this before.”

“You. Can. Do this.”

Looking up at Jason’s eyes, she saw just how much hope he had for her. Then he leaned in and kissed her.

“Man, is he dramatic today,” Tim said.

“Shut up, they just got married.”

When Jason pulled away, the heaviness in Y/N’s chest had slowly started to fade.

Yeah. He was right.

Her husband was right.

She does have the best aim in the room.

Alfred gestured for her to take the seat at the cockpit.  And with Jason holding her hand, leading her to the front, she slowly took the front seat.

Everything was at her control. It didn’t look too intimidating. She pressed onto the buttons and breathed in. Really breathed in.

Breathe. Breathe.

Jason stood back, but not without squeezing her shoulder.

Breathe.

She opened her eyes.

Flying the Batwing over to the top of the dome, right alongside Superman and Supergirl with their lasers still pointing at the center. It won't be long now.

Everything looked brighter. Everything felt hotter. The center of the Cloudburst, at the dome that was once its protective shield.

Irony. She always thought it was what’s going to get her.

Driving the Cloudburst, using it to take down the Batmobile.

Now she was driving the Batwing to take down the Cloudburst.

Yes. Irony certainly did come out to bite her.

But it was in the fucking best way possible.

Doctor Fate and Zatanna had joined in and fired their magical beams at the same spot at the center. Slowly, after each second that passed, she could see its shield slowly start to fade away. A ball around the glass tank of the toxin collapsed. And finally, it was seconds away from its very heart exposed.

Breathe.

The Bullet turned on her optics.

Further. Closer. Brighter.

NOW.

The rocket shot through the Batwing’s bazooka and it came flying out into the air. She waited for that half a millisecond watching it fall to the very spot she aimed at.

Everyone flew out of the sky before it landed on the Cloudburst.

Then the entire dome exploded like a massive nuclear bomb tearing out into the sky with its violently flying debris. The Justice League and the Suicide Squad had cleared out, and with the explosion it took away all the remaining nightmare creatures, dissolving them into the air as nothing but ash.

Everything was loud. Everything was bright. They shielded their eyes away before it blinded them and hid as the dome continued to explode.

They were so high up in the air that they could see the stars up in space despite it already the morning.

And as the bombing sounds had faded…

So did the toxin.

The once red cloud that had covered the sky had dwindled away to its natural white. Everything fell down in beautiful pink ashes. The same ones from when Ivy destroyed the first Cloudburst. They looked up at the sky, and with tears down their faces, everyone leapt in joy and cheered when everything looked as peaceful as it once was.

On the ground where the dome used to be, a crater of soil was left behind. No more creatures. No more darkness. No more Scarecrow.

Everyone took off their domino masks and visors. Dick took Tim and they screamed in happiness, jumped in the air, hugged each other until it hurt like girls at a sleepover. They took Alfred in as well and gave him the biggest bear hug there was.

“DID YOU FUCKING SEE THAT, BABE!?” Tim said into his comms.

Babs was just as ecstatic as they were. “I’M SO PROUD OF ALL OF YOU!!”

“WE FUCKING SAVED THE WORLD!!!” Dick leapt for joy.

“I THOUGHT WE WERE GONNA DIE OUT THERE.”

“I KNOW. THEN FUCKING WONDER WOMAN CAME IN AND DESTROYED EVERYTHING I MEAN HOW CAN ANYONE GET AS AWESOME AS THAT?!”

“YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN THE LOOK ON YOUR FACE,” Tim screamed. “IT’S LIKE YOU SAW HER AT FUCKING COMIC CON.”

“ALFRED.” They pulled him in. “TELL ME. DID BRUCE EVER DO ANYTHING LIKE THAT IN HIS LIFE?!”

“Well, other than the ten times he’s defeated Darkseid over at outer space, no I don’t think he has.”

“ WE STILL WIN. WE FUCKING DID IT!!!”

“JASON, DID YOU SEE IT WHEN GREEN LANTER- Jason?!”

They looked around. Jason hadn’t joined them in their little celebration.

Jason and Y/N were over at the back, kissing for what seemed to have been the last ten minutes and completely ignoring everything that went on around them. She was holding his face, and he was hugging her waist. Didn’t even stop when Tim cleared his throat.

Dick, on the other hand, had went up to one of the compartments and had grabbed a bottle of champagne they had stored there for purposes like this.

“Can't believe we almost forgot. CONGRATULATIONS TO THE NEWLYWEDS !!!”

Everyone in the Batwing clapped for joy and the couple finally stopped kissing, turning their heads over to smile at them.

“THIS CALLS FOR A CELEBRATION!”

“CHAMPAGNE FOR EVERYONE.”

Jason thumbed her cheek. “You alright with our reception being held in the Batwing?”

Y/N shrugged. “I mean, I wanted to book a caterer, but-“

Jason pulled her face again and kissed her with their hearts light and their spirits so high up in the sky.

A future. She could see it. It was all flashing in front of her eyes now.

Finally, something good had happened out of the series of darkness.

They drank, cheered, partied in the Batwing while it went in a really slow autopilot on its way back to the cave. They hung out like any group of friends would have. Like any family would have.

Jason held her hand the whole time. And Y/N held it even tighter.

This was the end. And it was beautiful, peaceful, promising.

And above all else, it was fucking epic.

-----

EPILOGUE

As if the world hadn’t already stopped surprising them, they continued to go through that very same day bringing them almost to the brink of a heart attack.

When the grounds to the Batcave descended, when the Batwing parked itself in its spot, when its entryway folded down for them all to walk down to, everyone was still in their high, laughing, skipping when they walked down the ramp and out into the walkway.

“Babs!”

Barbara wheeled right towards them and Tim held her in his arms, pulling her up to his level so he could carry her. They all cheered.

“I can't believe you thought of calling the League!”

Babs laughed. “Obviously, you needed help.”

Everyone started talking at the same time, each of them telling Babs one side of the story and how it happened. Explaining in detail how Wonder Woman did this and how Aquaman did that. Even Y/N was so excited she couldn’t stop talking about how Green Arrow’s aim was something she’d admired for so long. A bubble of noise, happy noise. Kids being together.

Like no time even passed. They continued on and on about everything that happened.

Then Jason looked behind at the computers. He stopped talking. His smile faded away. His heart stopped. His whole body stopped.

Everyone saw the look on his face and turned to look at what he was seeing.

At first, he looked just about as regular as any tall man.

And if you hadn’t been expecting it, like practically everyone in the room didn’t, no one would believe it at first glance.

Black shirt. Basic jeans. A jacket over his shoulders. Hair so long it had gone down to his neck pushed back.

But it was him. So undeniably him.

“Oh my god…” Babs whispered.

Bruce Wayne smiled at all their faces. Jaws on the ground. Eyes so incredibly wideset. He didn’t look the least bit bothered.

He walked on over closer to them, hands in his pockets. He stood a few yards away so as to not startle them.

His children.

“Dick…” he greeted.

The eldest choked on his breath. “Bruce…”

Bruce looked over at the girl with fiery red hair.

“Barbara…”

“Oh. My. God.”

Bruce grinned, then he looked over at the man beside her.

“Tim…”

“You're alive…” Tim breathed.

Then when Bruce met Jason’s eyes, everyone parted to give him his way. Bruce started walking towards him, and Jason swallowed on his tongue.

He hadn’t prepared for this.

Not by a long shot.

He thought he was never, ever going to see him again.

He never thought he’d have the chance to make things right.

And now, he did.

Bruce stood in front of Jason.

“Welcome back…” Bruce said. “My son…”

Jason pulled him into a hug, much to Bruce’s surprise. Much to everyone’s surprise.

But he wanted to skip all the thinking and the doubts and the holding back to everything he’s ever wanted to say to him.

Jason forgave him. Already after two years. And it meant so much that Bruce had forgiven him too.

Bruce hugged him back.

Bruce never hugs anyone back.

But he patted Jason’s shoulder and held him as tightly as any father could possibly hold his son. Jason was crying. Hell, everyone in the room was crying. Even Alfred was shedding a tear. Everyone watched on as they fell into each other’s embrace longer than they’ve had with anyone else.

Eventually, Bruce had to pull away.

“I’m so sorry…” Jason cried.

Bruce held his shoulders.

“Jason…” he said. “You have no idea how proud I am of you…”

Jason realized he’s never heard those words before.

He hugged him again, just because he couldn’t hold it back anymore. Y/N dried her tears with her shirt and met Jason’s eyes from over Bruce’s shoulder.

“Bruce…” Jason pulled away. “There’s someone I’d like you to meet.”

Y/N stood straight up. She dusted off her suit. She straightened her neck.

“This is Y/N,” Jason said with his hand on her back. She stretched out her hand, and Bruce took it.

“I’ve heard of you. Your girlfriend-“

“Wife.”

Her smile was so beautiful when he said it.

“My wife.”

Bruce shot up his eyebrows. “I see. Well, it would have been better if we had a talk-“

“Don’t. Do that.”

“I’m kidding,” Bruce laughed.

Y/N cleared her throat. “Such a pleasure to meet you, sir.”

“Y/N… I know who you are and who you were…”

“Bruce…”

He nodded at Dick.

“You were the Commander of the militia army. You were Deadshot. You took over your uncle’s old jobs.”

“Bruce, you don’t have to-“

He didn’t even look at Jason’s direction.

“And you drove the Batwing today…”

Y/N was scared shitless shivering on her own two feet. It wasn’t because she was talking to Batman, someone she almost had killed. It was because she was talking to her freaking father in law.

Jason swallowed.

“And I also happen to know… that you worked with my sons like a perfectly trained team and singlehandedly saved thousands of lives…”

Everyone’s eyes lit up. Especially hers.

“What do we call you now?”

“The Bullet,” she swallowed. “I’m the Bullet.”

“Well, Y/N,” he smiled. “The Bullet.”

Then he stretched out his hand.

“Welcome to the family.”

 -----

MASTERLIST

THE BULLET MASTERLIST

-----

TAGLIST

@everyartistwas-firstanamateur

@sarcasmismyfirstlove

@damned-queen-of-gotham

@idkmanicantenglish

@wunderstell

@birdy-bat-writes

@get-loki

@everyday-imfangirling

@comic-nerd-dc

@multifandoms916

@icequeen208

@offendedfishnoises

@egdolan

@xemiefx

@arkhamtoddler

@elsenthal

@mythicbitchx

@supremehaunter

@lucy-roo

@roseangel013bf

@loxbbg

@reclusive-chicken-nugget

@l-inkage

@http-cherries

@shadowsndaisies

@river9noble

@zphilophobiaz

@annoylinglyaries

@knightfall05x

@flowersgirl02

@hyp-oh-critical

@satan-s-ass

[btsslowburnfic]

BTS Reacts: Visiting the Pumpkin Patch/Apple Orchard-Hyung Line

It’s Fall AF where I live. I don’t know if these are a thing in the rest of the world, but here in Midwest USA I’ve already been to two apple orchards and a pumpkin patch. Happy Fluffy Friday ^_^

-Jin- You were so excited. Chuseok had just ended and Jin still had 2 days off. You decided it was time to usher in the new season with a trip to the Apple Orchard. “Why don’t we just go to the grocery store and buy apples?” your boyfriend jokingly complained as the two of you drove out into the country. “It’s not the same! It’s about the experience.” you adjust your sunglasses as the car winds down a curvy road. “The experience of picking apples? Isn’t this just them getting free labor?” You roll your eyes. “Whatever. This place also has a concession stand, animals, and a giant slide and zipline.” Suddenly you have his interest. “Oh? Really?” “Yep. So much more than just picking apples.” you say as the car turns down the first dirt road to the orchard. It’s a weekday so it isn't too busy. You mask up and pay the nominal admission fee. “Oh my God, Jin LOOK THEY HAVE ALPACAS” you squeal as you rush over to the petting zoo area. Jin jogs over behind you, “Just like RJ. These must be his brothers, AJ and MJ.” You laugh as you dig through your bag for a coin. “And look,” you gesture to the machine with food in it, “We can feed them!!!!!” You twist your coin in and little pellets fall out the bottom. You walk over to the fence and place your palm flat for the animals to come over and eat. “So cool. I’ve never seen a real alpaca up close.” you marvel at their size as they head over. Jin snaps a picture of you feeding them and then has you take a picture of him with them to post on Weverse later. “I can’t believe there’s not an RJ in the car,” Jin laments his missed photo opportunity while posing with AJ and MJ.   “Perfect. Triplets.” you joke and hand him his phone back. “Alright, let’s wash our hands and pick some apples!” Jin groans, “They have bags of apples in the gift shop that someone else already picked.” “Oh my God are you still whining about apple picking?” you playfully shove him. “Fine. Let’s wash our hands and then do the zipline and then pick apples.” you amend your statement. He kisses your forehead. “Much better.”   The two of you scrub the alpaca saliva off and head up the hay stairs to the zipline. “Look how big the orchard is!” you exclaim from the top of the hay bales. Jin slowly walks up behind you. “Yeah and think. People already probably picked all the apples up front, we’d have to walk all the way over there,” he gestures unnecessarily with his long arms towards the back of the orchard, “just to find them.” “We CAME here to PICK APPLES,” you grit your teeth and try to look annoyed since at this point you knew he was just teasing you. He gets strapped into the zipline. “I’m just saying, it seems like a lot of work.” You roll your eyes at him, “Hey Jin, baby?” “What?”  he turns back from getting ready to slide down the cable and smiles at you. “I just think you look cute.” you answer and lean over to kiss him. And then shove him down the zipline. “Byyeeeeeeee!” you yell and wave as you hear him shrieking. The attendant looks at you quizzically. “He’s fine. He’s fine.” you assure them as they get you strapped in. You  jump off the platform and through the air. When you arrive at the other side you see Jin pouting which makes you start to laugh. You turn in your zipline gear and walk over to him. “What’s the matter, pretty pouty man?” you put your arms around him. “You shoved me down a zipline.” he whines. “Ahahaha I did.” You lean back to look at him, amused that he’s trying really hard to keep pouting. “It was so mean.” “It was. I am terrible. Can you ever forgive me?” you place your hands on his chest and look up at him. “Only if you don’t make me pick apples.” he says with a straight face. You scowl at him and pull away. You hear his trademark laugh following you down the hill.

-RM/Namjoon- “Pumpkin patch. Pumpkin patch. Pumpkin patch!” you start chanting as you walk over to your husband on the couch. “Is that what today is?” he pulls you down next to him and you snuggle into his side. “Joonie,” you whine, “you said if the weather was nice we would go.” “I’m just teasing baby, here,” he shows you on his phone where he’s been researching the ratings of the pumpkin patches in town. You loved how much research he always put into everything. “I’m so excited. I haven’t been to one in years.” you smile. “Did you pick one?” “Yep, and I charged the fancy camera so we can get some nice pictures today as well.” “You are the best!” you lean over and kiss him on the cheek. “Let me grab some boots out of the closet and then I’ll be ready to go.” You are surprised that one of the highest rated ones is only a few minutes outside the city. You drive the short distance and arrive at a beautiful farm sprinkled in red, yellow, and orange leaves. “Oh my God, this is beautiful.” you say as you exit the driver’s side. Namjoon already has the camera out and shoots some photos of the barn and trees. “I’m so glad you brought the camera,” you say as you nervously watch him handle the thousands-of-dollars camera. “But make sure you use the wrist or neck strap.” “Are you saying you don’t trust me to hold an expensive item without breaking it?” he pretends to act shocked. You smile and walk over. “I would never say that,” you place the strap around his wrist and laugh as you look up at him. “Never.” He laughs. “I totally would have. Or left it sitting somewhere. Thanks for talking me into taking today off.”  He takes you by the hand as the two of you head down to the farmhouse. e There is a small general store full of breads, james, hay bales, and scarecrows. Much fall. So knickknack. You walk over to the counter where a farmer is sorting produce, “Excuse me sir, which way to the pumpkin patch?” “Head out the back of the barn. You can either ride the wagon back there or walk.” The two of you exit the barn and find yourself in the middle of a group of about fifty small children and their chaperones. “Oh.” Namjoon says, his eyes involuntarily going wide. “It must be a school trip. That’s ok. We can walk back there, I think they’re waiting for the wagon.” The two of you ease your way through the tiny mob and start walking down the gravel. “Alright. We have to beat that wagon before the field has 50 fewer pumpkins,” you say as you pump your arms and channel your inner speed walker. “And get some pictures without random children in them,” he adds. By the time the two of you walk the Kilometer to the patch you two are slightly out of breath. “Alright. Let’s find the perfect pumpkin.” you say as you survey the patch. The two of you wander the fields scouting out the perfect size and color pumpkin. Namjoon takes some photos of the field and you. “Ok, time to trade,” you say, gesturing to the camera. “I don’t know.” he suddenly acts shy. “Oh come on, you have to. You’re wearing your plaid shirt, it’s like you purposefully dressed to be a pumpkin patch model.” you grin as you take the camera from him. You snap some photos of him and the rural landscape.  You hear the throttle of the tractor and a bunch of kid voices getting closer so the two of you each grab a pumpkin and start walking back to the farmhouse. The wagon of children all wave excitedly and point at the two of you and your pumpkins. Namjoon laughs and waves back with his free hand. “Did you have a good time?” he asks as the two of you enter the general store. “I did. I felt a little rushed because of the kids but that’s ok. It looks like they’re having fun.” You smile. “You’ll be such a great parent someday,” he smiles as he leans over to kiss you.

-Suga/Yoongi- “More coffee.” Yoongi’s gravely morning voice requests after you remind him it’s apple orchard day. He had gotten out of bed and was now doing a great impression of a rock as he sat at the kitchen table with his face in his hands. “Honey, they have cider at the orchard.” “Cider doesn’t have caffeine,” he responds. “Coffee.” You run your fingers through his hair and smile  “Fine, fine.” you walk over to the Nespresso and make a cup of coffee for him. You take the mug over and slide onto his lap. “I’d be careful if you want to make it to the apple orchard.” he growls into your ear and squeezes your waist. “Yoongi,” you giggle and stand up. “There’s time for that after the apple orchard.” you wink and walk over to your purse. “We need to leave here in 45 minutes.” “Why? Are we on a schedule?” “A little bit. We’re meeting up with Tae and Jimin.” “Oh yeah? Cool.” he monotonously responds as he continues to wake up more and more with each sip. -- It’s a beautiful fall day with a light breeze blowing and the sun shining. It’s perfect for what you have planned. The ride up was nice but quiet. You were super nervous about how the afternoon was going to go. "Are Tae and Jimin here yet?" Yoongi asks as he pulls into the parking lot. You check your messages. "Yep. They're already out in the orchard and say we should head out to meet them." you exit the car and wait for yoongi. The two of you hold hands as you look for the best way to get into the orchard. You weave in and out of the apple trees looking for your friends. “It’s so beautiful today.” he says quietly. “It really is. Do you remember the last time we came here?” He smiles, “Oh yep. I remember. Speaking of, do you have your epi-pen with you?” “Of course,” you pat your purse. Eventually you find where Tae and Jimin had set up. “What’s all this?” Yoongi gestured to the blanket and basket sitting in the clearing. “Tae and Jimin set this up, they went to the car and said to have a seat and wait for them.” “Are you sure this is their stuff?” he mumbles. “Yep. They sent me a picture,” you flash it to him. “Let’s go find them.” he starts to pull you the other direction. “No. We should really stay and wait for them. I don’t want to get lost.” you say as you head over to the large hounds tooth blanket and have a seat. “Since when are you worried about being lost? We wandered the streets of Dublin for hours.” “I just want to make sure we don’t miss our friends. Come sit with me,” you pat the  spot on the blanket carefully. Yoongi looks toward the entrance one more time and then gives in, coming over to sit next to you. You check your phone one more time. Satisfied, you slip it into your purse. You stiffen as a bee flies over to the blanket. “Aish, I got it.” He pulls his sleeve over his hand and swats it away. “If I see another one, we’re getting up and moving. Actually, an apple orchard was a terrible idea to come to with your allergy.” “I know, I know. I thought about that too but I wanted to come here today. I remember the last time we were here.” “Yeah, I thought you were going to die.” Yoongi says, trying to sound casual, but you can detect the slight shake in his voice. You shrug and take him by the hand, “But I didn’t. And that’s the day I knew that you were the one for me.” You lean over and kiss him gently on the lips. “You stayed calm and helped me inject myself and then took me to the hospital and stayed even though I kept begging you to just leave while delirious and crying.” He smiles shyly, “Yeah, it was what, like our second or third date? I called Namjoon to cancel going to practice and he yelled at me for even being out on a date and then I hung up on him.” “What? You never told me that before,” you exclaim. You had no idea you’d caused any drama. “I didn’t want to worry you.” he replies, gently pushing your hair behind your ear. “Well, that’s why I wanted to come back here today,” you begin as you grab a small box out of your purse. “I knew on that day that you would do anything to protect me and just how much you care about me even though it was so early in our relationship. I don’t deserve you, but if you’ll have me, I’d like to make forever official with you,” you open the box and present him with a small black band. “Are you proposing to me?” he asks quietly. “I’m trying to. Am I doing a bad job?” you ask nervously, suddenly worried he’s going to say ‘no.’ He smiles and takes the band out and looks at it.  “No. I’m just surprised. And happy.” he puts it on. “So….is that a yes?” you ask nervously. He looks up at you with wet eyes. “Of course.” he leans over and the two of you kiss, it slowly turns into a make-out session until you hear someone clear their throat. You pull away smiling and look over at Taehyung and Jimin. “They’re actually here?” he says surprised. “Congratulations!” Jimin yells and attacks Yoongi with a hug. “Did you get any pictures?” you ask Tae. “Oh yeah. Lots of them,” he smiles at you. “You did a great job planning this.” “You were all in on this!?” Yoongi exclaims, throwing Jimin off of him. “Yep! I wanted Taehyung to take pictures and Jimin wanted to join as well.” “Aish, I’m lucky to have such great friends,” he leans over and quietly in your ear, “and such a wonderful fiance.”

-JHope/Hoseok- Your boyfriend is sitting on the couch dragging his feet about going out today, "It's not a haunted corn maze, right?" Hoseok asks you for the 50th time with a disgusted look on his face. You let out a sigh and put your hands on his shoulders. "No babe it's just a normal corn maze where we wander around and try to get to the other side." "... I don't know." "I think you are emotionally scarred from Run BTS," you say as you press a kiss to the top of his head and move to sit next to him.  "We don't have to do the corn maze if you don't want to.”  You take his hand in yours. “Let's just go and pet the pumpkins. If we decide to do something else while we're there that's fine too." "OK sounds good. I saved some cool carvings on my phone," he pulls it out to show you a few intricate designs he's saved. "ooo very cool. We'll need at least 2 big pumpkins and a few medium. Are you ready?" you ask as you put your bag over your shoulder. He grabs a cap and follows you out the door. ------ The pumpkin patch is just outside the city and is famous for its corn maze. This year it is in the shape of an underwater scene with fish, whales, and dolphins. You point out the picture at the entrance to Hobi emphasizing the “family friendly” parts of the poster. “I’m not saying we have to. I’m just showing you what it looks like.” you emphasize as the two of you walk over to the barn area. There are chickens and horses lazily wandering around the yard. “Have you ever been to a farm before?” he asks you as you take photos of the animals. “No. Is it obvious?” you laugh. “I’ve seen horses before but not just like wandering around with chickens and stuff.” “You’re cold,” he states rather than asks. “Here,” he takes off his sweatshirt and hands it to you. “Now you’ll be cold.” you say as you put on the still-warm sweatshirt. You not-so-secretly loved taking your boyfriend’s hoodies. “I’m fine. Besides, if we walk through that giant maze I’m sure we’ll work up a sweat. And the sun is coming out.” he smiles at you. He just radiates happiness, it’s one of the things you love about him. “You’ll try the corn maze? Really?” you turn and face him, wrapping your now-warm body around him. “Yes, I’ll try it.” he kisses you on the tip of your nose. “I read and it says they have emergency exits if we need to leave.” You laugh, “Well hopefully we won’t have to use them, but it’s nice to have the option.” The two of you wander over to the sign marked “Entrance” and take a few pictures for posterity and then begin wandering around. You hit several dead ends and Hoseok flinches a few times turing around corners. “Babe are you still worried there are zombies in here?” you ask, trying not to laugh because you know even though it’s silly, he’s scared. “..No. Just making sure we don’t run into people. Alive or otherwise.” You laugh. “Hey, here’s one of the emergency exits, “you gesture to a sign above the dead end the two of you have just walked into. “No. Not yet. We’re not giving up.” his voice sounds determined. “We’re going to conquer this corn maze. Or at least try for another 30 minutes, I’m getting hungry.” he grins as you two double back. You set a timer on your phone but when it goes off the two of you have a feeling you are getting close to the exit because you have moved pretty far along the treeline. You had the wherewithal to take a photo of the maze back at the Pumpkin Patch entrance so you know the exit is on the North side of the maze. “I think this is it!” he yells excitedly, pulling you by the hand and breaking out into a run.  You turn one last corner and the two of you emerge victorious. He takes your hands and raises them above your head in true champion fashion.  You take a picture of your sweaty happy smiles in front of the exit sign. “I knew we could do it!” you exclaim and lean over to kiss him.  “Hey Hobi,” you say, catching your breath still. “Yeah?” “Let’s just eat food and get pumpkins from the farm store. I don’t want to hike to the back of the farm to the pumpkin patch.” “Oh thank God,” he says, “I thought I was going to have to beg you not to.”  he laughs. “Seriously. I want one of everything from the concession stand.” you say as the two of you walk back towards the farmhouse. “Ahaha me too. I love you.” “I love you too.”

[jloves-pp]

The Story of Merida and Hiccup part 5

Chapter 5-Touch the sky

Hiccup yawned as he was cooling a hot piece of met into a bucket of water. He have up early to remake Toothless's tail fin, he did this so less people would see and question him. Hiccup had been at DunBroch for four days and Merida was able to have a tent set up. She also asked for Blacksmith tools and equipment, Hiccup did wonder how to thank her for anything she done from him and Toothless.

He place the already cooled piece flat on table before watching over his drawings, seeing if anything needs changing.

"Hiccup? You're in it?" Hiccup turned to see Merida walking in with tray for fruits, bread and cheese.

"Hey, sorry about missing breakfast with your family" Hiccup said as Merida gave he the plate.

"No, it's understandable, mum is more worry about you being hungry" Merida explained smiling as she crossing her arms as Hiccup took a bite of bread. "mum wanted the services to send some food but I suggested I'll make it, annnd I brought a wee treat for late" and she then placed the sweet cake next to Hiccup.

"Thank you" Hiccup said then added "did you make this cake"

"No"

"Oh that's ok. Just wanted to sure it doesn't turn me into a bear"

Merida couldn't help but laugh at the joke, she should had seen that coming. Her eye then fell upon Hiccup's drawing, she didn't understand them but she known what they were.

"Are these the designs from the tail?" Merida asked.

"Yeah" Hiccup replied as he joined Merida "I drew from what would left, added what would broken and did some minor changes that need alternates. I just need to make two more picses and saw up the leather for the fin and then we're good to go"

"Hic, if it's ok with you. Would you mind if I sew the fin for you" Merida asked him. She was surprised about her offering to help for she haven't done something like that for before.

"You sew?" Hiccup said in surprised, Hiccup thought Merida couldn't sew for what she told him. So this was a real shock.

"Aye I do" Merida said crossing her arms.

"Sorry, sorry it's just I never thought of you as the sewing tape" he quickly approaches, rubbing his neck.

"Well, there are somethings you need to learn as a princess and sewing is one. She replied reassured him "Who do you think made this dress" she added showing him the puffs on her sleeves.

"Oh you did? That's really impressive, I really like it" Hiccup said honestly.

"Thank you, it's better for archery" Merida answered proudly. No one ever complained her dress that she made, hearing Hiccup like it made her happy.

"Well If I draw it out and write the measurements then you can do while I try to finish these metal pieces" Hiccup expected at a moment "now where's that pencil?" And he searched for it among the papers.

Merida looked as well until she spotted one under a pices of paper "there's one" she said and they both reached and grabbed it. Merida got there first and Hiccup's hand was on top of Merida. The two frozen and they faces turned pink, there was that straight feeling again. They been having this feeling for a while, mostly when they hands touch. Hiccup and Merida looked at each other, not knowing what to do.

Hiccup's mind became scrambled, thinking of a hundred way to apologised. Merida meanwhile wanted to say something but nothing came out. Eventually they moved their hands with Merida still holding the pencil.

"I'm sorry. No, I was my.." Both of them said at the same and then the two started laughing lightly together with help get rid of the awkward moment.

"Here" Merida said and handed Hiccup the pencil.

"Thank you" Hiccup replied taking it from her. "I'll start scratch it out now and give it to you it once it's done" Merida was about to say there was no rush when they heard someone yelled at the top of their lungs.

"Right, I had enough of you three. Come back here" The teens peeked out of the test to see Maudie running after the Triplets which Harris wearing a maid dress, holding it up as he ran while Hubert and Hamish were a bucket all of cakes.

"There they go again" Merida said grinning, watching her brothers disappearing around the corner with poor Maudie behind them.

"Do they do this all the time" Hiccup asked closing the certain.

"Aye, they at less pinch a treat or two as day. We surely would worry if they haven't" Merida told him lening against the table.

"Oh, has their crimes mostly cakes based or do they do other operations?" Hiccup asked as he walk back to the table.

"Well, they know for the odd prank or two. They had started big fights during clans meetings and of course they did help me with getting mum out of the castle" Merida said smirking that the countless prank and trick they pulled off. She then noticed Hiccup food, it was hardly touch it. Then saw Hiccup head down, sketching away in deep concentration. "Maybe we should have a break, you been busy all morning. Why not have lunch by the archery field while I do some practice"

Hearing Merida suggest made Hiccup pause. He was determined to finish the tail but he do feel tired and hungry. He really needed a break.

"You know, that's not a bad idea" he finally replied looking up the the Redhead"

"Good. I'll get my bow and quiver and meet you there" Merida said smile happily before heading to the opening.

"Err..where is the archery field again" Hiccup asked sheepishly. He still didn't know where places would and he hasn't been to the game field yet.

"You turn right toward the arch way and it's on the other side of the bridge" Merida explained. "Ok meet you there" and gave Hiccup a small smile before leaving.

The young Viking tidy up, collected his lunch and walked to the field. He couldn't help but think DunBroch was quite similar to Berk as he walked across the bridge. Not only the bridge but the forests, the food and the people remind him of home. Hiccup started to feel a bit home sick and wonder how his dad was doing.

"Ha, look at that gangly lad. He looks like a scarecrow" Hiccup heard a loud voice yelling. He looked up to see a group of men laughing they heads off. "I don't think the crows won't be scared of him" and laughed even more.

Hiccup was use to people making fun and calling names before he met Toothless. All know he would brush it off, deep inside it did upset him. The insults disappeared and everyone says genuine good things to Hiccup. Hearing these terrible words, brought back bad memories he thought they were buried down. Pretending he haven't heard them, Hiccup kept walking until he spotted some targets.

Hiccup sat against one of the target and ate the rest of his lunch, after eating he fell asleep. Hiccup didn't know how long he was but he felt something tickling on his nose, this cost him to sneeze which woken him.

"What the..." He managed to said. he then heard giggling, Hiccup looked up and Merida covering her mouth with one hand and had a arrow in the other.

"Sorry. I couldn't resist" Merida expected. Hiccup soon figured in out. Merida used the featured end of her arrow to tickling his nose.

"Ha,ha very funny" Hiccup said sarcastically but good natured. "I have to get me own back"

Merida grinned at this "we'll see" she said "now, for some practice" and she took her bow off the shoulder and pull one of the arrow out of the quither. "Would you like to try?" Merida then asked offering the arrow.

"Err no, I'm good" Hiccup insisted "if I did, I probably end up shooting someone in the eye"

Merida wanted him to have a go but she didn't want to force anyone into anything that makes them uncomfortable.

"Ok, how about I do some and you watch, then when you ready. You can have a go" Merida suggested putting one of hands on her hip.

"Ok, sounds good" Hiccup replied. Pretty soon. Arrows were flying from the Scottish princess, hitting bullseyes every time. Hiccup was really impressed. He heard about Merida's archery skills from her story and how he heard from her family. Seeing her putting back and then letting her arrow go. Hiccup was mesmerised. He then began to sketch Merida in his book, he made sure that all the angles, her stance and how to she hold her bow, he wanted to draw her right. He seemed to draw Merida's face longer. There was nothing wrong with his drawing faces but doing Merida's was different, maybe he wanted to make it perfect or maybe something else.

After Merida had her seventh round, she notice Hiccup drawing in his book. Curious, she walked up to him then asked "What are you drawing?" Hiccup nearly jumped out of his skin and he quickly slammed his book shut.

"Er, er. Nothing, nothing. You would find it boarding" Hiccup stuttered, his face turning red. Merida did though about asking again but decided against it.

"Ok. It's your turn" she said and handed him her bow. Reluctantly Hiccup took the bow and then stood in front of the target. He loaded the arrow, shut his eyes and was about to shot.

"You're doing it all wrong" Merida shouted seeing how Hiccup held himself, his arrow wouldn't go too far.

"I know" Hiccup admitted clutching the bow "I never was good at it, wielding anything for that matter"

She sighed and walked up to help him. "Here, I'll show you" she said more softly helping him to ready the bow. "First, you need to open your eyes and you head need to keep your head forward, You need to see where you aiming" she moved his head to the right direction. "Then you need to relax especially on your shoulder" she then added. Hiccup rolled his shoulder, breathing a few times. "Now pull your arrow to your check, then focus on your target then release.

Hiccup pulled the arrow, looking at target. He hoped the arrow would at least hit the target. With one last breath, he released the arrow. It soared beautiful and hit right in the bull eyes.

"I..I did it, i did it" Hiccup cried in disbelief. He couldn't wipe the smile "I actually hit it"

Merida clapped and cheered for Hiccup "see, I knew you would do it" and punched slightly on Hiccup's arm.

The young boy didn't mind it for he was too happy to care. That is until a chorus of laughs echoed behind them.

"That boy sounds like a goose" one of the men shouted.

"Maybe he was one in another life" said another men and began honking and acted like a goose while his friends laughed.

The princess looked over to Hiccup, to see him trying to hide his sadness. She remembered his story from the other day, he mentioned that he was picked on a lot mostly for his appearance.

Merida's blood boiled as she turned back to the men who were still laughing their heads out. "How dare they said horrid things to him" Merida though as she stormed over to them.

Hiccup finally managed to pull himself together. He was just about to ask if they could leave but he glanced to find Merida marching up to the laughing men who weren't laughing when they saw the princess.

"May I ask, what happens to be so funny?" She asked with her hand on her hip.

"Well er..." They said, not as confident as before " well we never seen this odd boy before, we just having a joke..." One manage to say. Merida only glared at their terrible excuse.

"He happens to be my dear friend and if I heard one more heartless comment. You'll have a lot of time of thinking in the dungeons" she added which drained the colour off their faces.

"But princess is only a joke" one of the man pleaded but the Scottish princess wasn't buying it.

"Well if you still assist. How about getting my mother opinion on this"

"No! No! Please don't being the queen" they pleaded now their face turn white as snow then one man suddenly said " I...I heard my wife called me" for this the other men chorused...

"Oh yes"

"Me too"

"Just remembered I need to find my sheep"

Merida watched them huddled away with their tails between their legs.

Hiccup didn't know what to say. No one not even his father ever stud up for him, Also he admired that her fearless and her wit. He wished he have someone like Merida around when he was younger.

"I don't think they going to bother you again" Merida said reassuring when she walked back. To her surprised to see Hiccup look unsure.

"What's wrong?"

The young boy was brought out of his thoughts "Oh nothing, it just...thank you" he said smiling happily

"You're welcome" Merida replied relieved he was alright. "they're lucky I didn't try a new fight move my dad taught me"

"Oh what is it?" Hiccup asked

"He called it the head squisher, I could show you how it works" Merida suggested

"And now I regret asking, no I good. I wouldn't want to...what I mean is..is" Hiccup began is fumble.

"It's fine" Merida replied understanding "I'll show you some other time. Now we have a tail to finish "

"Hey but hope you don't know if we get fresh drinks" Hiccup asked as headed back to castle.

"Yes, it really warm today. I like a drink as well" Merida agreed.

As the teens walks, they didn't know they had been watched. Elinor, who was doing some royal duties where she saw the two, she saw them doing archery and saw Merida telling the men out about Hiccup. Elinor smile at them, it was nice seeing her daughter having a friend for Merida only real friend was Angus. She continued watching them as they disappeared before Elinor went to finsh her job.

The next day, Hiccup was headed to meet Toothless, carrying a newly made tail fin. He and Merida working tirelessly the rest of that afternoon until they finally finished the tail, Hiccup was dying to test it right away but it was getting dark so they planned the test tomorrow. Merida needed to help her dad with training some new guards, Hiccup said it was fine and Merida told him she'll catch up with him when she can.

"Hey Toothless" he cried when he saw his best friend drinking the water from the river. Toothless instantly ran and circle happy around his friend. "Hey, ok I'm happy to you" he put one hand around his dragon's neck. "Well, what do you think?" He asked and show Toothless the tail.

Seeing his night fury's toothless smile and his purring, Hiccup knew Toothless like it.

"Yeah it really cool. You know, I'm surprised how good Mer was at metal work. Even know she never done it before" Hiccup then said looking at the tail fin. As they make the fin yesterday, Hiccup taught Merida how to make metal, to bend it and everything he knows. Merida mostly done the sewing while Hiccup did the metal work but Merida did help him when he asked she.

He remembered Merida telling him a funny story when they were working. It was about his dad and a blueberry pie that end up he having a blue moustache for a week. He is though that Merida has a sweet laugh and was a wonderful storytelling.

Hiccup then noticed Toothless giving him a look.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Hiccup asked raising an eyebrow. Toothless answered by directly looking at the tail, The young Viking wasn't sure at first but then it clicked.

"No,no Toothless, she's the princess of my deadly emeries. It couldn't be anything more. Even having her as a friend as bad" Hiccup explained, he signed heavy and burned his face in his hand. Toothless walk up to his friend side, gave a small purred of apologise. Hiccup peeped toward his fingers and showed his dragon a small smile to him

"It's ok bud" Hiccup reassured Toothless "It just becoming so complicated the long we stay. If Merida knew the true she..."

"What are you talking about?" Hiccup quickly turned to see Merida holding the saddle with Angus beside.

"Merida!" Hiccup said blessing, trying to think what to say "I was telling Toothless about your dad and that pie that made him blue" he laughed weakly. he felt awful, he hated lying to her.

Merida could see Hiccup grow palm when he talk. She wanted the question him more but she shrugged and let it go.

"Hey Toothless I got something for you" she said before she looked forward her bag. The Night fury instantly perked up, hoping it was fish."it's not salmon but hope it's still tasty" and pull out a very long eel.

Toothless growth and narrow his eyes which made Merida confused

"Oh Mer, dragons really don't fond of eels" Hiccup quickly expected as he tried to clan the Night Fury down.

"Oh I'm sorry" she said understanding now and toss it away as hard as she could. Toothless immediately softened when eel disappeared "That mite be good to know if dragons suddenly attack us. We'll just launched eels at them"

Hiccup couldn't help but laugh at the thought" yeah, I really want to see that now"

Merida join with him "oh I brought this" she said after finishing laughing and held up the saddle.

"Oh I absolutely forget, Thank you" Hiccup said and gently took saddle. His hand brush against Merida's hand and that cause the two to bless. They wasn't sure if they knew but Toothless and Angus could sense chemistry between the two human.

Hiccup and Merida quickly step away before their blessings got worst. Merida went to check on her horse just as Hiccup began putting the saddle on Toothless. It didn't help Hiccup, seeing Toothless giving him a knowing look.

"Not a word" Hiccup murmured warning. It didn't take long for Hiccup to fastened the saddle and the tail fin on his friend, Merida in the meantime led her horse to the river for a drink while she brush him "ok, we're all set" Merida turned to see Toothless suited up.

"You do look quite handsome, don't you Lad" Merida said to Toothless when the dragon hopped over to the princess. She gently scratch underneath Toothless's neck who purred and gave a lick Merida's check, causing the princess a laugh hard.

Hiccup was made up seeing Merida and Toothless bonding. She was a true dragon ride, not judge Toothless or himself at first sight plus He did like her fiery spirit. Toothless then hopped back to Hiccup and licked all over Hiccup face.

"Toothless" He laughed trying to stop his dragon "you wanted to go flying, didn't you" he then asked and Toothless nodded. "Ok we'll head up and test the tail out"

"Can I come with you?" Merida asked. She did wanted to fly on Toothless for a long time since Hiccup told his story. It sounded fun and exciting.

Hiccup hesitate at first, he wasn't used to someone wanted to ride Toothless but seeing her blue eyes bright up and knowing it wouldn't been in the air for long.

"Yes, just make sure to hold on" Hiccup said as he climbed on to his dragon's back.

Wasting no time, Merida hugged Angus, rush over and climb on behind Hiccup as he hooded his leg into the special pedal that control the tail fin.

"You're ready" Hiccup said to Toothless and before Merida knew it, they launched into the air. Merida gasped, shit her eyes and grabbed on to Hiccup's shoulders as they climbed higher and higher. Merida felt the rush of wind against her checks, it wasn't until she felt the wind slow down. Slowly, she opened her eyes and took in the sight. She always imagine what was it would be like to fly but this was better that she thought. the highlands that Merida knew so well, looks so different from above.

Hiccup smile when he looked over to Merida, seeing to wonder on her face. They happened to fly above DunBroch Castle and looked like model and fingers of people from where they were.

Inside the castle, Elinor was looking forward some letters as she past by window. She glanced over and halted, the queen had noticed something black among the cloud. Judging by the shape, it looked like a dragon but it quickly disappeared. Elinor pause for a moment. Did she see what though or what's it just her imagination.

Merida breath in as they glide through the clouds, she reached out and tried to feel cloud.

"Enjoy the view, Mer?" Hiccup asked.

"Yes. This is the most incredible thing I ever done." Merida answered happily "thank you and thank you too Toothless" and softly patted the dragon on his side which Toothless gave the princess a small smile.

"How about we take it up a notch" Hiccup then said, an idea just popped into his head.

"Ow like what?" Merida replied feeling a little excited

Hiccup lowered the whispered to Toothless "ok, let's show her what we can do" Toothless smirk at this and then shot downward. Merida's hair was flying behind as she cluck on tight to Hiccup. He bless lightly by this but he need to concentrate. Just as they near the ground, they flew by up again. Hiccup did think Merida was going to tell them out but instead, she laughed. Toothless began spinning so quick, everything become a blur.

"Isn't this great" Hiccup shouted as they spurned.

"Yes this is the most exciting thing I even done" she replied and scream with joy. She love flying fast and feel the wind in her hair. After they stop spinning, they found a ravine and show Merida how they dodge and move toward it. Soon the sun was setting as the teens and Toothless gentle glide around the mountains

"Well I can say the tail working. We should probably head back now" Hiccup said seeing how late it was getting.

"No" Merida suddenly said then added more softly " just...just a wee bit long. I really enjoying the view" Hiccup looking out and saw what she meant. The glow of the sun makes the meadows, the forsets,the rivers and the mountains a mystical feel to them.

"Yeah me too" he agreed. The two shared a warm smile before looking over again. Enjoying this beautiful moment as long as they could.

[myaekingheart]

140. Dog Days

read the scarecrow and the bell on ao3 index | from the beginning | < previous | next >

               Rei’s hand skated across the mattress to slam the snooze button. The sun was far too bright and her stomach unbearable, and all the while all she could think about was her job. The aftermath of the previous day had left her unhinged and out of control. She spent the entire night on the bathroom floor, waking intermittently to puke. It had to have been five in the morning when Kakashi scooped her up in his arms and carried her back to bed, rubbing her back and brushing the matted hair out of her sticky face. She wondered where he was now, what time it was. Did he have a mission today? Or was he off running errands? She couldn’t remember through the thick haze in her mind.

               And then the bedroom door creaked open and Toshio nosed her forearm from the edge of the mattress, whining. Rei tucked her head under her pillow and swatted lightly at his snout, moaning “Not now, go let yourself out.” He was a smart dog, she was sure he could relieve himself on his own accord. But then she heard footsteps, the tender and steady gait of her fiancé, and then Kakashi was by her side.

               “Rei, get up” he whispered, brushing his hand along her freckled shoulder.

               She poked her head out from under her pillow for only a moment, glaring at him. “I’m tired, leave me alone” she croaked.

               “Not possible” Kakashi replied, shaking his head. He tugged the blankets back, much to her dismay, and urged her to sit upright. “We have things to do today.”

               “Oh, really?” Rei asked, mockingly. “Like what?” She smacked her lips, her mouth dry and rancid, and reached for the glass of water on the end table.

               Kakashi tried to fight the small smile threatening his lips. “We’re going on a picnic.”

               Rei choked on her drink, spluttering into the crook of her elbow. Kakashi set her glass down and patted her back lightly in an effort to help her regain her composure. “I’m sorry, we’re doing what?” she gasped.

               Nodding, Kakashi repeated, “A picnic. You, me, and the dogs.” Grabbing the kunai from his dresser, he pricked his thumb and pressed it hard against the floor. In a puff of smoke, all eight of his ninken appeared in their bedroom.

               “Hey, Kakashi. What’s up?” Pakkun’s gruff voice greeted. Toshio immediately leapt into the fray, sniffing and barking at the other dogs in delight. It wasn’t often that he got to spend time with Kakashi’s ninja hounds, so he clearly took great joy in such a rare treat.

               Smiling, Kakashi explained the situation to his dogs. Rei listened closely herself, trying to parse some sort of rationality as to why Kakashi thought this was a good idea. He kept his voice low, however, as if this was a surprise for his fiancée specifically. The ninken all seemed to nod along in eager agreement to his plan.

               “Kakashi, do we really have to do this today?” Rei whined once her fiancé was finished. “I feel like shit, I just want to stay in bed.”

               “Do you think that will make you feel any better?” he asked.

               “…yes” Rei replied bluntly.

               Sighing, Kakashi shook his head and settled on the edge of the bed beside her. “I know this has been a lot. I know you’ve been feeling terrible, but I think the fresh air and the sunlight will do you some good. It’s not healthy to stay hidden away in bed all day like this” he explained. His eyes skated to the chakra plants on her windowsill. Hers was already beginning to sag. “You need fresh air and sunlight and good food. You need to stay healthy, Rei. For us.” Here, he pressed a gentle hand to her stomach, a reminder of the life growing inside of her. Of the reason for her suffering. Wasn’t it reason enough to push through the pain?

               Rei turned her gaze to the dogs then jumping and panting happily. A soft, sympathetic smile tugged at her lips. “Well, they all seem pretty excited about this, so…I guess I can’t stand to tell them no” she murmured. And really, seeing Toshio so happy for the socialization was enough to convince her. He was never as happy as he was when surrounded by other ninja hounds.

               Rei got ready slowly as Kakashi stood in the kitchen packing them a lunch. He opened the windows and let the dogs sprawl out in the living room as he worked, tongues lopping out of the sides of their mouths and panting peacefully. It was a brutally hot, bright day, ripe with the promise of early summer. Rei pulled her hair back haphazardly into her signature ponytail, pausing for only a moment to frown at her wonky reflection. She ran a hand over her stomach and swore that she was already beginning to show.

               Rei held Kakashi’s hand tightly as they weaved through the weekend crowds toward the park. The dogs romped and played all the way there, truly alive with the warm, sweet, summer air. There was something so intrinsically heartwarming about the sight of them, something almost healing. Besides, how often did they even get a chance to relax? So often they were merely companions in battle. They needed this respite as much as Rei did.

               Kakashi set up camp for them under the thick coverage of a rather large tree by the river. He spread their blanket out, floral and fading, and began setting out their food. Rei, meanwhile, waded toward the shoreline, kicking her shoes off as she went. The grass was damp and coarse beneath her feet, the riverbank muddy. She crouched down anyway to dip her toes into the water, rushing cool and refreshing. Minnows circles her ankles as her presence disrupted their flow. She closed her eyes, tilted her head back toward the sun, tried to let it melt away the weight of her worries and the funk of her morning sickness. Unfortunately, she was not entirely successful. Her shoulders were still heavy with all that lie ahead.

               “Rei!” Kakashi suddenly called across the field. Rei turned to meet his gaze, smiling at her through his mask. “Ready to come eat?” With a single nod, Rei shook the water off her feet, gathered her sandals, and returned to him. She plopped down cross-legged on the blanket beside him and drew the bento box cautiously up into her lap. Kakashi had evidently gone to great lengths to make a quality lunch for her, complete with onigiri shaped like smiling little dogs. In the back of her mind, she wondered if he was already practicing for their child’s school lunches. A shiver ran down her spine—though whether it was wholesome anticipation, or uncertain anxiety, she wasn’t quite sure.

               Kakashi discretely ate his food as he watched the dogs splash through the river and chase each other into the grass. A small smile touched his lips as he drew his mask quickly back up over his face and reached over to take Rei’s hand in his. “You know what this reminds me of?” he asked.

               “What?” Rei replied.

               Turning to her, Kakashi brushed the hair out of her face and replied, “Remember that time you helped me give the dogs flea baths?”

               “And they shoved us together and made us kiss?” Rei laughed. “How could I forget?”

               “God, that had to have been, what? Four years ago now? Six?” Kakashi mused.

               “Eight, I think” Rei corrected. “I had just joined the black ops. You were twenty, and I was eighteen. Right?”

               Kakashi shook his head in disbelief. “Eight years” he sighed. “It still feels like it was just yesterday.”

               “I guess time flies when you’re having fun” Rei jested, poking Kakashi’s shoulder. Her engagement ring glinted in the summer sun, filling her with an unavoidable sense of nostalgia. She gazed down at it longingly, pressed her opposite hand to her stomach. “We’ve come so far” she added wistfully.

               Kakashi nodded, lifting her left hand up to plant a gentle kiss on her knuckles through his mask. “Mmhmm. Soon we’ll be married, and become parents” he said, resting his hand atop Rei’s on her stomach.

               “It feels like it’s all happening so fast” she whispered.

               “Well, like you said” Kakashi replied, “time flies when you’re having fun, right?”

               Laughing lightly, Rei replied, “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

               Kakashi watched her for a moment longer, studying the uncertainty that she tried so hard to hide from her face. “Are you okay?” he asked.

               Without lifting her gaze, Rei nodded and replied, “Yeah, I’m just…thinking.”

               “About what?”

               “I don’t know, just…everything?” Rei pursed her lips and sucked in a deep breath. “There’s just…a lot to consider. I mean, I already had to back out of my job”—here, her voice cracked and it was clear that this was still a tender subject for her. “And now I guess the next thing is figuring out the wedding.” How was a pregnancy even going to factor into something like this? Her mind swirled with thoughts of wedding dresses and tiered cakes, ultrasounds and speculums, nurseries and honeymoons and childbirth and I do’s. Rei’s stomach began to churn. “Maybe we should’ve just gotten married at the registrar’s office after all” she muttered.

               Kakashi frowned. “Don’t say that. We can still manage a proper wedding” he replied. Quite frankly, he wasn’t sure how, either, but he tried to remain optimistic. Where there’s a will, there’s a way and it was no secret that the Will of Fire burned brightly within both of them. “Besides, if nothing else” Kakashi then said, chuckling softly, “You’ll just have to be a pregnant bride.”

               Rei gasped, reaching across their picnic blanket to playfully slap him on the arm. “Don’t say that!” she laughed. I’d look like a giant marshmallow, she thought to herself. The thought of it only further heightened her nausea.

               “What?” Kakashi laughed. “It’s a possibility.”

               “It better not be!” Rei countered.

               Kakashi grinned beneath his mask. “I don’t know, I think you’d look pretty cute in a wedding dress with the baby bump.” Rei made a stink face in obvious protest. Sensing her obvious displeasure, Kakashi intertwined his fingers with hers and rubbed the back of her hand sweetly. “I mean it” he assured her. “I don’t think you’d look any less beautiful because of it. If anything, I think it would make me even more excited to marry you.”

               “Oh really?” Rei asked, cocking a brow. “And how do you figure that?”

               “Because” he began, locking his eyes on her, “it would just feel that much more meaningful. Like I’m really committing myself to loving and caring for you and this child for the rest of my life. Like a true rite of passage into our future. I’ve never wanted anything more.”

               Rei’s heart melted at his sincere devotion, a dreamy smile tugging at the corners of her lips. “You’re such a sap, Kakashi. You know that?” she murmured with a light, airy laugh.

               “I do my best” Kakashi beamed, clearly triumphant.

               As she drew her hand back, Rei dropped her gaze to her lunch and began poking at the bed of leafy greens beneath her onigiri. “I just hope the wedding dress will still fit, or else I’m going to need a lot of alterations.” She smoothed her tunic out over her stomach with her free hand, idling for a moment at the waist of her pants and suppressing the instinctual frown threatening her lips. In the back of her mind, she saw herself evolve at warp speed, her belly constantly expanding until she was full to bursting. She was on the cusp of unimaginable change. Her stomach lurched and she forced herself to swallow down the lump in her throat. Without another moment of hesitation, she pushed her bento box to the wayside.

               “You’re not hungry?” Kakashi asked, cocking a brow.

               “Not after last night” Rei muttered. She could still feel the cold tile of the bathroom floor pressing against her knees, the echo of her retching from within the toilet bowl.

               Kakashi frowned. “You still need to eat something” he said. He returned his hand to her belly, caressed it tenderly. “You need to stay healthy and strong so that our child can grow to be healthy and strong, too.”

               “I know” Rei pouted. “It’s just hard to eat when everything makes me feel so sick.”

               Reaching toward the bento box, Kakashi handed her one of the onigiri. “At least try to eat the rice. That should be easier on your stomach” he offered. Presented like that, Rei knew there was really no room to refuse. She took the little rice ball carefully, holding it as delicately as a bomb, and took small, apathetic nibbles. It almost felt wrong, the way it was staring back at her with those doleful doggy eyes. She always felt guilty eating food shaped like animals. While her hesitancy was not what Kakashi had hoped for, at least it was a start. At least she was eating something.

               “So have you figured out the details for that trip yet?” she then asked, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand.

               Kakashi grinned and Rei wasn’t sure whether she ought to feel excited or concerned. “I have some things in mind” he replied, “but I’m afraid you’ll just have to wait and see.”

               “What?!” Rei gasped, laughing. “That’s rude! Why aren’t I allowed to know?”

               “Well, that would ruin the surprise” Kakashi mused.

               Groaning, Rei buried her face in her hands and shook her head. “Kakashi, I’m so tired of surprises” she complained. “Can’t you just please tell me where you’re taking me?”

               Kakashi shook his head definitively. “Sorry, but I’m afraid no level of pouting is going to get any information out of me” he said. Frowning, Rei rolled her eyes and drew her knees up to her chest. Shouldn’t Kakashi know better than to pick on a pregnant woman like this? She only wanted answers. Kakashi couldn’t help but find her absolutely adorable seeing her pout like that. Scooting nearer, he brushed her bangs away from her face and kissed her cheek as he assured her, “Just trust me. You’ll thank me later.”

               “Yeah, okay” Rei scoffed. “We’ll see about that, Kakashi.” Pursing her lips, she rubbed her forearms anxiously before finally stretching her aching legs back out in front of her. Toshio presently came running toward them, spotted tongue lopping out of the side of his mouth. He skidded to a halt and crouched down in front of Rei, butt wiggling in the air, before barking and lunging at her playfully. He whipped around to chase his tail, biting at his behind, before pausing, barking in her face again, and spinning in the other direction. Rei lifted an arm up in front of her face to shield herself, laughing with the knowledge that Toshio would never hurt her, and quickly reached for a nearby stick to hurl back toward the lake. Toshio froze, eyes wide and mouth shut but tongue still hanging over the side, as she waved the stick in his face then launched it clear across the field. The dog spared no expense as he whipped around and darted off after it at full speed.

               By the time evening had draped over Konoha, the dogs had grown sleepy and lethargic. They trudged back home behind Kakashi and Rei with dragging paws and heavy panting. Rei rested her head against Kakashi’s shoulder as they went, slowly so as to not upset her sensitive stomach. She locked her fingers with his and thought of the large precipice sprawling before them. How many more days like this would they have? How much time did they have left before their lives were irrevocably disrupted by the child growing inside of her? Rei clenched her tunic lightly and swallowed back her fear.

               Truthfully, over the past few days she had only flicked idly through the pamphlets from the doctor’s office. It was as if every time she came near them, her anxiety shot up into her throat like a rocket ready to explode. It didn’t matter how calm and collected she tried to remain. Her panic always triumphed. Deep down, Rei knew the naked truth: she had been blind to how involved having a baby truly was. Obviously she knew that pregnancy was an overwhelming journey of immense change but it held no true weight to her then. She wasn’t in it and therefore couldn’t feel it. In the past few days, however, reality had punched her squarely in the gut. She didn’t want to believe that Sekkachi may have been right when she accused Rei of seeing things through rose-colored glasses. It felt like a petty assumption, an insult. The anxiety that had since taken root in Rei’s stomach, however, was all too real.

               Clenching her jaw, Rei squeezed Kakashi’s hand lightly and swallowed back all of those negative, pounding thoughts. Reminded herself that it would all be worth it in the end. They were having a baby. This was meant to be one of those most fascinating and joyous times of her life. And besides, wasn’t this what she had always wanted anyway? A sweet little baby to have and to hold, the perfect combination of her and the man that she loved? Ever since those days of her youth when she would shove her baby doll up her shirt and rope Kakashi into playing games of house. Wasn’t this what she had wanted all along? There was no room for uncertainty or fear. Not now. This was happening whether she was truly ready for it or not.

               Sensing her unease, Kakashi turned to her as they turned the corner and squeezed her hand back lightly. “Are you okay?” he asked. “Do you feel sick again? I can carry you the rest of the way if you want.”

               The thought of him scooping her up in his arms  was equal parts heartwarming and ridiculous. Rei suppressed a smile, shook her head. “I’m alright” she smiled politely. “Just…thinking.”

               “About the baby?” he asked. Rei nodded. “Is everything okay?”

               Rei swallowed back her fear, forced a smile on her face. “Yeah” she whispered. “Yeah, everything’s just fine.” Even if she didn’t fully believe it herself yet, she needed to force herself to believe it. She needed to convince herself that she was capable, prepared, strong. Yet again, there was no room for uncertainty or fear. No room for second-guessing and rose-colored glasses. This was her life now. Ready or not, they were going to have a baby.

[jeromesxreader16]

Such A Joker (45)

Part 44 Here!!!

~o0o~

I adjust the mask sitting on my face and smile at myself in the mirror. I could get used to this again. I could convince Jerome to leave with me to terrorize Central City. We could start over. He could laugh at frightened civilians while I make his favorite foods. No chances of an ending, only growth.

"Well don't you look dangerous." Jerome lays his chin on my shoulder peppering my skin with kisses. "You know what I've noticed?" "Hmm?" "You've been very loving lately." Jerome meets my eyes. "I've missed you?" "Try again." "I love seeing you laid below me?" He smirks chuckling. "Temping, but I can tell you're lying." Jerome huffs shaking his head. "I'm just seeing what might happen if I try to possibly have a tiny kid with you." My heart skips as I look deep into his eyes. "You want a kid, Jerome?" He shrugs walking away. "I don't know. A little. Don't you think it's time we-" "Yes." I nod my head smiling at him from the mirror.

His green eyes rake my form. "Yes?"

I look at myself in the mirror before sighing, taking the mask off, taking my hair down, and setting the gun and the mask on the table. I run my finger over the think black mask before turning to Jerome nodding my head. "Yes."

Jerome breaks out a smile and grasps me in his arms. He laughs in my shoulder. "I've never been happier." He whispers in my ear. I hug him tightly smiling. "Jim will be pissed." Jerome cackles loudly. "Yeah. He will be."

He looks down at me grabbing my cheeks. "I'm going to keep you safe, love. All of us." He says placing a hand on my stomach. "Jerome, there isn't anything there yet." I laugh shaking my head at him. He bends down kissing the place where his hand was. "You don't know that!" He argues smiling.

"You better go before you're late." "THAT'S SHE SAID!" "JEROME!" He laughs walking out the door. "Oh! I almost forgot. You'll be on the rooftop waiting for me right? I want you to see the show!" I tilt my head smiling. "I'll be there, Jerome."

~

Jim POV:

"Hello?" I say into my phone looking over several maps. "Have you found her? Any signs?" I sign over the line. "Jeremiah, I told you when I know you'll be the second one to know." "Don't you think we should try harder to-" "No one is working harder than me to find my daughter. Now you can ruin your chances now or you can hold off and let me do my job." Harvey holds his laughter as he shakes his head. "I'm sorry Mr. Gordon. I-I just... I care about her. I love your daughter Jim."

"I know you do. You and your brother. Which is why I know if Jerome took her, she's safe. He wouldn't hurt her, Jeremiah." He huffs in frustration. "Well, whatever I can do to help please let me know. I can't lose her." "You and I both." I hang up the phone sighing as Harvey laughs. "This is why I don't have kids." "Oh yeah? That's why?" "Hey, pal, what's that supposed to-" My phone rings again causing me to roll my eyes. "Jeremiah I told you I'm looking for her!"

"Gordon. We need to talk." Oswald speaks in the line. "Oswald?" "I'm outback. Come alone." "Yeah. All right."

~

"Well, this is a first." He scoffs waddling over. "Are you doing anything about Jerome?" "We're looking for him. Have you seen (y/n)?" "I saw her this morning. She's fine." "Do you know where she is?" "And if I did, do you think I would just tell you? Have you march in there, guns blazing? He needs to be stopped. He has everyone under his thumb... Freeze, Firefly, Hatter. They are all part of his plan. A dark, terrible plan."

"Which is?"

Oswald caves slightly. "Scarecrow has made a gas for him."

"Like a fear toxin?"

"Worse. Much worse. I saw it turn someone into a maniacal, cackling, violent animal."

"And what does he plan to do with it?" "He's smart. He hasn't shared the details of his plans with anyone." "I bet (y/n) knows." Oswald shakes his head. "He's told her the least. He doesn't want her involved." I sigh. "Frankly that's a relief."

"Instead, we all have a separate task to perform." "Such as?"

"He has yet to give me my role."

"Why did you come here if you're not gonna help me?"

Oswald yells shaking, "He scares the living hell out of me, okay? I mean, I was willing to play along with him for a while. Perhaps he had a way to make us all rich? A return to the good old days, you know? But nothing good will come of this."

"Or maybe you just don't like the competition," Oswald smirks at me before reaching into his blazer. "I'm not the only one who is worried." He passes me a note in my daughter's handwriting.

Dad, I hope you're okay. Just know I am. I hope Jeremiah is good too. I need you to stop Jerome. This isn't the Jerome we saw before. He's broken and completely insane. When he was reborn he lost every bit of sanity he was gripping onto. He's planning something bad. I'd rather see him locked up safely than killing hundreds this way. Do whatever you can. I love you, dad.

"She wanted to come. She's not allowed to leave without telling Jerome." "Where is he? Where is the gas?" "He only tells you what he needs to when he needs to. I just know he has to be stopped."

"Jim! Hey! You down here?! Jim?!" Harvey yells for me as Oswald disappears. "A uni just spotted Jerome near Paisley Square. Said (y/n) was seen being escorted to a rooftop." "All right, let's go!"

I call Jeremiah as I sprint towards the car. "She's in Paisley Square on top of the roofs. Stay where you are. I'll bring her to you." "But Gordon-" I hang up speeding towards the Square.

~

♪ Time has come today ♪

♪ Young hearts can go their way ♪

♪ Hey ♪

♪ Can't put it off another day ♪

♪ Time has come today... ♪

I smile watching the show from the top. Jerome comes out dancing on stage and steals the mic from the lead singer.

"Hey, buddy, beat it, will ya? I'm trying to work here!" He pushes Jerome causing him to laugh and knock him down with the mic stand. Many scream and run as the rest of the legion of horribles take their place on stage.

"Whoo! Where's everyone going? Ladies and gentlemen, we are the Arkham Asylum Lunatics. We came here to blow some minds! Whoo! Sorry to interrupt your little show, but you are gonna love this next one."

Jerome walks over to the side of the stage pulling out the line of hostages. "Introducing Mayor Pritchard, Commissioner Reynolds, Archbishop McGregor, and this lady... whoever she is. This is everybody. Everybody, say hi. Now, as you can see, we're still waiting for two guests of honor. But in the meantime, let's go over the rules of tonight's entertainment, shall we?"

"Dynamite." Jerome refers to the collars they wear. "Trigger." He waves the small box in his hands. "I don't get what I want? Boom. Headless people. And if any of you are thinking of going anywhere, you'll die, too. Snipers on the rooftops. Now, the one man who can give me what I want..." Jerome smirks before yelling out proudly.

"Calling Gordon. Calling Captain James Gordon." Jerome cackles loudly in the camera.

~

Jerome pulls out his phone and seconds later mine rings. "Hello? I think you're reached the wrong number." "Haha. Very funny. Remember I know where you sleep, doll. How's the view?" "Beautiful. You overdid yourself." "Had to get the best seat in the house for my future wife." "Future wife? I like the sound of that." Jerome giggles looking at me from the stage. "I bet you do. Keep watching, doll. You don't want to miss the fun." He hangs up welcoming my father to the crowd.

"Ladies and gentlemen, as I live and breathe, my soon to be father in law, James Gordon is in the house!" Jim shakes his head making his way closer to the stage. "Don't be stupid, dad."

"I'm not talking to you until I can get up there and check on the well-being of your hostages, and talk to my daughter." "First of all, Jim, you're late. Secondly, I think I'm the one who should be making demands, and thirdly, no."

"What you're doing is an act of terror, Valeska. Ask our mayor what this city's policy is on negotiating with terrorists."

"Terrorist? Frankly, I'm offended."

Jerome turns looking at the chairs then looking at Jim. "I got two empty chairs here. You haven't even asked me who they're for yet."

Jim shrugs, "All right, I'll bite. Who are they for?"

"Come on, James. I learned early your family has an eye for finding clues. You're a detective. Do some detecting."

"Jeremiah, your brother."

"Bingo. That's one. And the other?" "My daughter? I assume you're a tiny angry with her." Jerome scoffs laughing. "Dumb guess. MOVE ON!"

"The only other... irksome do-gooder who's ever spoiled my fun in this town. Bruce Wayne!"

"No!" My father yells. "You can take me. I'll sit up there with one of those things around my neck, but I won't let you have him."

"Well, I don't want you, Jim. I want my brother and I want Bruce. I want them now!"

I lean over the edge watching my father search the area, he looks up meeting my eyes. I wave frantically smiling. "All right. Let me get these people out of here, I'll come up there..."

"You are not listening to me! And that is forcing my hand." Jerome looks down at his remote.

I shake my head feeling guilt well in my chest. All these people don't deserve this.

"Jerome..."

He shakes his head. "No..." He presses the button and one of the hostages heads exploads causing everyone to scream.

"Bring me, my brother. Bring me, Wayne. Bring 'em now."

I shake my head looking around. "I can't let him do this." I leave my seat running down to the streets and away from the show.

I love Jerome. I do! I wish we could live a life together, but not like this. Not with him wanting to kill every moving thing. What would he teach our children if we had any?

I run down the street running in front of a car. It honks and stops inches from me.

"(Y/n)!" Dad gets out of the car running to me and engulfing me in his arms. "Dad." I cry into his hold. "We have to do something. We can't let him just-" "Shh. I know, but I need your help, (y/n)."

I nod wiping the tears. "Let's go."

~

I knock on the Wayne manor door waiting. "So... You and Jeremiah are-" "I don't know, dad." "Well you and Jerome have been-" "Dad. Please." He raised his hands. "I'm just trying to find out how you got two brothers to fall in love with you." I look up smiling at him. "Me too."

"Do you... still love him?" I look down at my feet. "Which one?" "Both?" I look at my father sighing. "I do. I love them both in different ways. I can't see Jerome hurt himself like this though. He's going to get himself killed." "And Jeremiah?" I smile thinking about the quite brother. "Jeremiah's sane, he showed me how to help myself, and I think that's why I'm not falling in line with Jerome's plan."

Alfred opens the door allowing us in.

"Master Bruce, we have visitors."

I step forward speaking, "Bruce, we need your help." "What happened?"

My dad turns on the TV showing Jerome's show. "Don't you know it's rude to keep a guy waiting? Bring me my hostages, James. My trigger finger is getting itchy."

"The hostages he wants are his brother... and you."

~

As we pull up to the Maze I smile. "He's home?" I smile nodding hand jumping out of the car. "Where else would he be?"

I open the door with my code and run through the maze coming to his office with the others far behind me. I step in looking at him hunched over the desk. ""Jeremiah." His eyes shoot up meeting mine. "(y/n)?"

He runs towards me holding me up in his arms. "I thought I lost you. I'm so glad you're okay." As he puts me down I place my hand on his cheek smiling. "He would never hurt me. He might after this, but I'm okay."

"What are you-" I crash my lips against his feeling light and free. I wrap my arms around his neck sighing into the kiss. Jeremiah pulls away holding me at arm's length. "Wait. wait. wait! Why are you here right now? Aren't you engaged to Jerome?" I look in the hall and see my father, Fox, Bruce, and Alfred. "We need your help, Jer."

Jeremiah looks at my father with fear.

"I watch the news. And you must be out of your mind if you think I'm gonna be led like a lamb to slaughter." "Jeremiah, I know you're scared, but we need to do something. He doesn't bluff."

"If we ignore his demands, there's no telling what he might do. If he finds out (Y/n) slipped away to do this he might lock her up for good. We wouldn't see her." Jeremiah looks at me with soft eyes. "You said he would never hurt you." "And he wouldn't. But he's not letting me go anywhere. He told me he was going to put me somewhere I couldn't be heard."

"We can block his remote's signal with this. If you and Bruce can get within a few feet of him, it will disable his remote... He'll be a sitting duck."

"For God's sake, Gordon, you have to know what he wants. To... murder us both on live television."

Bruce steps over offering his hand. "Mr. Valeska. I'm Bruce Wayne. It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Likewise. I... wish the circumstances were better."

Bruce looks at the large generator raising his brows. I smirk as Jeremiah's face shows stress. He gets so caught up in his work.

"May I ask what it is you've been working on?" "Um, yeah. It's a compact electrical engine. It generates power. (Y/n) has a good idea of spreading them out across Gotham. It would wipe out the other company."

"Fascinating." I nod wrapping my arm around Jeremiah. "My boyfriends pretty smart, huh?" Jeremiah blushes, pushing his glasses up his nose.

"How much power?"

"Just two could light up every building south of Westward Bridge."

"I understand if you choose not to help us today. But I trust that Captain Gordon and Mr. Fox will see that no harm comes to me. But even if it does... maybe, by facing Jerome... I can show the people of Gotham that standing up to terror is the only way to take its power away."

I nod clapping, "If you ever lose your money Bruce, motivational speaking could work for you."

[baddadjokez]

514 Dad Jokes

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.​I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.​Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.​Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!​I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.​What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.​How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.​I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.​Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.​I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.​My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.​Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.​How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.​What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.​Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.​There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.​What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.​What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.​Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.​Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.​How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.​The shovel was a ground breaking invention.​A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."​A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."​Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.​What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.​I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.​What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.​I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.​Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.​Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"​Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.​What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.​Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.​What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.​What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.​What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.​A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.​After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.​I used to be afraid of hurdles, but I got over it.​To write with a broken pencil is pointless.​I read a book on anti-gravity. I couldn’t put it down.​I couldn’t remember how to throw a boomerang but it came back to me.​What should you do if you are cold? Stand in the corner. It’s 90 degrees.​How does Moses make coffee? Hebrews it.​The energizer bunny went to jail. He was charged with battery.​What did the alien say to the pitcher of water? Take me to your liter.​What happens when you eat too many spaghettiOs? You have a vowel movement.​The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray was a seasoned veteran.​Sausage puns are the wurst.​What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.​Why shouldn’t you trust atoms? They make up everything.​What’s it called when you have too many aliens? Extraterrestrials.​Want to hear a pizza joke? Nevermind, it’s too cheesy.​What do cows tell each other at bedtime? Dairy tales.​Why can’t you take inventory in Afghanistan? Because of the tally ban.​Why didn’t the lion win the race? Because he was racing a cheetah.​What happens to nitrogen when the sun comes up? It becomes daytrogen.​What’s it called when you put a cow in an elevator? Raising the steaks.​What’s america’s favorite soda? Mini soda.​Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.​What kind of car does a sheep drive? Their SuBAHHru.​What do you call a french pig? Porque.​What do you call a line of rabbits marching backwards? A receding hairline.​Why don’t vampires go to barbecues? They don’t like steak.​How do trees access the internet? They log on.​Why should you never trust a train? They have loco motives.​Is your refrigerator running? Better go catch it.​The future,the present and the past walked into a bar.Things got a little tense.​I saw an ad for burial plots, and thought to myself this is the last thing I need.​I just found out I'm colorblind. The diagnosis came completely out of the purple.​I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.​Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming.​I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.​Read enough of our funny puns, and you'll be punstoppable.​Yesterday a clown held the door for me. It was a nice jester.​I used to go fishing with Skrillex but he kept dropping the bass.​The wedding was so emotional even the cake was in tiers.​What does a house wear? A dress.​Why can't bicycles stand up on their own? Since they are 2 tired.​I owe a lot to the sidewalks. They’ve been keeping me off the streets for years.​Imagine if alarm clocks hit you back in the morning.It would be truly alarming.​Why is a skeleton a bad liar? You can see right through it.​What do you receive when you ask a lemon for help? Lemonaid.​A man sued an airline company after it lost his luggage. Sadly, he lost his case.​What does a dog say when he sits down on a piece of sandpaper? Ruff!​What do you call crystal clear urine? 1080pee.​At my boxing club there is only one punch bag. I hate waiting for the punch line!​An untalented gymast walks into a bar.​Einstein developed a theory about space, and it was about time too.​I was accused of being a plagiarist, their word not mine.​My friends say they don’t like skeleton puns. I should put more backbone into them.​Let me FILL you in on my trip to the dentist.​Why does the singer of Cheap Thrills not want us to Sia?​Traveling on a flying carpet is a rugged experience.​Cartoonist found dead in home. Details are sketchy.​The old woman who lived in a shoe wasn’t the sole owner,there were strings attached.​Did you hear about the crime in the parking garage? It was wrong on so many levels.​My new diet consists of aircraft, its a bit plane.​Have you ever tried to milk a cow which has been cut in half? Udder madness.​Why are there fences on graveyards? Because people are dying to get in.​Why do trees have so many friends? They branch out.​Models of dragons are not to scale.​Never discuss infinity with a mathematician, they can go on about it forever.​Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.​Don’t trust people that do acupuncture, they’re back stabbers.​A persistent banker wouldn’t stop hitting on me so I asked him to leave me a loan.​I ordered a book of puns last week, but i didn't get it.​People say i look better without glasses but i just can't see it.​Don’t judge a meal by the look of the first course. It’s very souperficial.​I heard Donald Trump is going to ban shredded cheese, and make America grate again.​I relish the fact that you’ve mustard the strength to ketchup to me.​What do you call a young musician? A minor.​Police were called to a daycare yesterday, where a 2-year-old was resisting a rest.​If artists wear sketchers do linguists wear converse?​I changed my iPod name to Titanic. It’s syncing now.​Jill broke her finger today, but on the other hand she was completely fine.​I smeared some ketchup all over my eyes once. It was a bad idea in Heinz- sight.​I flipped a coin over an issue the other day, it was quite the toss-up.​I got hit in the head with a can of soda? Luckily it was a soft drink.​I heard that the post office was a male dominated industry.​Why isn’t suntanning an Olympic sport? Because the best you can ever get is bronze.​What do you mean June is over? Julying.​Why is Kylo Ren so angry? Beause he’s always Ben Solo.​These reversing cameras are great. Since I got one I haven’t looked back.​The candle quit his job because he felt burned out.​Our maintenance guy lost his legs on the job, now he’s just a handyman.​Going to bed with music on gave him sound sleep.​A magic tractor drove down the road and turned into a field!​I met some aliens from outer space. They were pretty down to earth.​The plane flight brought my acrophobia to new heights.​My phone has to wear glasses ever since it lost its contacts.​I, for one, like Roman numerals.​How do mountains see? They peak.​The show was called Spongebob Squarepants but everyone knows the star was Patrick.​This is not alcohol, water you thinking?!​Novice pirates make terrible singers because they can’t hit the high seas.​I told my friend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.​The earth's rotation really makes my day.​If I buy a bigger bed will I have more or less bedroom?​Two peanuts were walking in a tough neighborhood and one of them was a-salted.​Two ropes were walking in a tough neighborhood and one of them was a-frayed.​What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.​I got a master’s degree in being ignored; no one seems to care.​After eating the ship, the sea monster said, I can’t believe I ate the hull thing.​Smaller babies may be delivered by stork but the heavier ones need a crane.​A bartender broke up with her boyfriend, but he kept asking her for another shot.​I had a pun about insanity but then I lost it.​He couldn’t work out how to fix the washing machine so he threw in the towel.​Why does the man want to buy nine rackets? Cause tennis too many.​Why don’t cannibals eat clowns? Because they taste funny.​If I got paid in lots of Pennes I would make loads of pasta.​I thought I saw a spider on my laptop, but my friend said it was just a bug.​A doctor broke his leg while auditioning for a play.Luckily he still made the cast.​The tale of the haunted refrigerator was chilling.​Why are frogs so happy? They eat whatever bugs them.​If you wear cowboy clothes are you ranch dressing?​I was addicted to the hokey pokey but I turned myself around.​Simba, you're falling behind. I must ask you to Mufasa.​I bought a wooden whistle but it wooden whistle.​The bomb didn't want to go off. So it refused.​The sore mummy needed a Cairo-practor​I feel sorry for shopping carts. They’re always getting pushed around.​The display of still-life art was not at all moving!​On Halloween October is nearly Octover.​Pig puns are so boaring.​Why couldn’t the dead car drive into the cluttered garage? Lack of vroom.​What do you call Samsung's security guards? Guardians of the Galaxy.​What does Superman have in his drink? Just ice.​How does a penguin build it’s house? Igloos it together.​Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.​The safe was invented by a cop and a robber. It was quite a combination.​What do you do when balloons are hurt? You helium.​One hat says to the other, "You stay here, I’ll go on a head."​How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten tickles.​When does a farmer dance? When he drops the beet.​When the scientist wanted to clone a deer, he bought a doe it yourself kit.​If people ask how many puns I made in Germany I reply, "nein"​Did you hear about the invention of the white board? It was remarkable.​If Donald Trump becomes president, America is going toupee.​Can February March? No, but April May.​I hate Russian Dolls, they are so full of themselves.​What do you do to an open wardrobe? You closet.​The magazine about ceiling fans went out of business due to low circulation.​So what if I don’t know what apocalypse means? It’s not the end of the world!​Some aquatic mammals at the zoo escaped. It was otter chaos.​A backwards poem writes inverse.​Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.​I asked my friend, Nick, if he had 5 cents I could borrow. But he was Nicholas.​The soundtrack for Blackfish was orcastrated.​Where do you imprison a skeleton? In a rib cage.​There’s a fine line between the numerator and the denominator.​I used to work at a hairdresser but i just wasn’t cut out for it.​Why is metal and a microwave a match made in heaven? When they met, sparks flew.​The lumberjack loved his new computer. He especially enjoyed logging in.​Garbage collectors are rubbish drivers!​When the church relocated it had an organ transplant.​Lettuce take a moment to appreciate this salad pun.​The scarecrow get promoted because he was outstanding in his field.​Sleeping comes so naturally to me, I could do it with my eyes closed.​I never understood odorless chemicals, they never make scents.​What do prisoners use to call each other? Cell phones.​Why was dumbo sad? He felt irrelephant.​When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.​Old skiers never die. They just go down hill.​Did you hear about the pun that was actually funny? Neither have we.​You know why I like egg puns? They crack me up!​Want to hear a pun about ghosts? That's the spirit!​I used to make clown shoes… which was no small feat.​Did you hear about the human cannonball? Too bad he got fired!​What happened when the magician got mad? She pulled her hare out!​Did you hear about the circus that caught on fire? It was in tents.​The one day of the week that eggs are definitely afraid of is Fry-day.​A hen will always leave her house through the proper eggs-it.​The man who ate too many eggs was considered to be an egg-oholic.​All the hens consider the chef to be very mean because he beats the eggs.​Eskimos keep all of their chilled eggs inside of the egg-loo.​Under the doctor’s advice, the hen is laying off eggs for a few weeks.​I had a real problem making a hard-boiled egg this morning until I cracked it.​The best time of day to eat eggs is at the crack of dawn.​The chicken coop only had 2 doors since if it had 4 doors it would be a sedan.​Crossing a cement mixer and a chicken will result in you getting a brick layer.​That reckless little egg always seems to egg-celerate when he sees the light turn yellow.​Hopefully this egg pun doesn't make your brain too fried or scrambled.​Don't ever have multiple people wash dishes together. It's hard for them to stay in sink.​People using umbrellas always seem to be under the weather.​I dissected an iris today. It was an eye-opening experience.​What was Forrest Gump’s email password? 1forrest1.​What planet is like a circus? Saturn, it has three rings!​Before my father died he worked in a circus as a stilt walker. I used to look up to him.​Why did the lion eat the tightrope walker? He wanted a well-balanced meal!​I really look up to my tall friends.​I hate negative numbers and will stop at nothing to avoid them.​Long fairy tales have a tendency to dragon.​It takes guts to make a sausage.​Why shouldn’t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she’ll “Let It Go”!​What do you call cheese that’s not yours? Nacho cheese!​How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it​What do you get when a witch goes to the beach? A sand-witch!​Where do cows go on Friday nights? To the mooooo-vies!​What did the mommy tomato say to the baby tomato? C’mon, ketchup!​Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because he wasn’t “peeling” well!​What did one snowman say to the other? Do you smell carrots?​Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance? Because he had no body to go with!​What is a pirate’s favorite letter? Arrrrrr!​What does a piece of toast wear to bed? His pa-JAM-as!​What does one eye say to the other eye? Something between us smells​Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide!​What happens when an egg laughs? It cracks up!​What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!​Why didn’t the teddy bear want dessert? Because he was stuffed!​Why can’t you tell a joke while ice skating? Because the ice might crack up!​What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop!​What’s mommy and daddy’s favorite ride at the carnival? A married-go-round!​How did Cookie Monster feel after eating all the cookies? Pretty crummy!​What do you call a skunk who flies in a helicopter? A smelly-copter!​What do you get when you shake a cow? A milkshake!​How do you catch a squirrel? Climb up a tree and act like a nut!​Why did the bee get married? Because she found her honey!​What did the ocean say to their airplane? Nothing, it just waved!​Where do eskimo pigs live? In pig-loos.​What’s a dinosaur called when it’s sleeping? A dino-snore!​What did the cookie say to the annoying cookie? Crumb on!​Why did Mickey Mouse go up in space? To find Pluto!​What does Olaf eat for lunch? Icebergers!​What letter is always wet? The C!​How do you throw a space party? You planet.​How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.​Nope. Unintended.​The shovel was a ground breaking invention, but everyone was blow away by the leaf blower.​A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."​A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says "Make me one with everything."​Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.​What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.​The broom swept the nation away.​I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.​What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back for seconds.​What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.​I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.​Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.​Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says “Do you smell fish?”​Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in france? There was nothing but des brie.​Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.​What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.​Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.​What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.​What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.​What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.​A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.​After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.​I used to be afraid of hurdles, but I got over it.​To write with a broken pencil is pointless.​I read a book on anti-gravity. I couldn’t put it down.​I couldn’t remember how to throw a boomerang but it came back to me.​What did the buffalo say to his son? Bison.​What should you do if you’re cold? Stand in the corner. It’s 90 degrees.​How does Moses make coffee? Hebrews it.​The energizer bunny went to jail. He was charged with battery.​What did the alien say to the pitcher of water? Take me to your liter.​What happens when you eat too many spaghettiOs? You have a vowel movement.​The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray was a seasoned veteran.​Sausage puns are the wurst.​What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.​How did Darth Vader know what luke was getting him for his birthday? He could sense his presence.​Why shouldn’t you trust atoms? They make up everything.​What’s the difference between a bench, a fish, and a bucket of glue? You can’t tune a bench but you can tuna fish. I bet you got stuck on the bucket of glue part.​What’s it called when you have too many aliens? Extraterrestrials.​Want to hear a pizza joke? Nevermind, it’s too cheesy.​What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.​What do cows tell each other at bedtime? Dairy tales.​Why can’t you take inventory in Afghanistan? Because of the tally ban.​Why didn’t the lion win the race? Because he was racing a cheetah.​Why did the man dig a hole in his neighbor’s backyard and fill it with water? Because he meant well.​What happens to nitrogen when the sun comes up? It becomes daytrogen.​What’s it called when you put a cow in an elevator? Raising the steaks.​What’s america’s favorite soda? Mini soda.​Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.​What kind of car does a sheep drive? A lamborghini, but if that breaks down they drive their SuBAHHru.

[funkymeihem-fiction]

My Lovely Assistant - The Revenge of Dr. Junkenstein (NSFW)

“Oh, Dr. Junkenstein! There you are!” A voice chimed from above, a soft orange glow descending from the dark skies. The Witch’s curled slippers made no sound as she alighted on the cobbles, wet with rain and blood and scattered with ash from the charred corpse that lay half-curled near the wall.

His labcoat was in tatters, burnt to a crisp and spattered with black where it had once been clean white. The man’s skinny form had gone fetal in a hopeless attempt to defend himself at the very last, but he was peppered with arrows and bullets, and covered in alchemical fluids that had burned him all the faster when his own grenades had exploded as he’d fallen. A pair of blue glass goggles lay in a puddle nearby, the left lens cracked.

The Witch of the Wilds leaned down over the gruesome thing with surprising tenderness, her gloved fingertips reaching out and gently touching the burnt locks of ashen hair. Her eyes closed, she said the correct words, and focused…as a bright light lit the world for half a moment, and the charred husk was a man once more. Dr. Junkenstein uncurled from the ground, coughing up a mouthful of ash and wiping his lips on a thick rubber glove. Understandably, he seemed more disoriented than anything, dragged back to the world of the living yet again.

“Wuugh…” Sitting up, his eyes rolled in two different directions, swaying slightly. “You never think that fire is going to hurt as much as it does, y’know?”

“Welcome back, Dr. Junkenstein,” the Witch said smoothly. “Although I fear that you were bested yet again. Where the Lord of this Castle keeps summoning these new allies from, I’ve no idea. I wonder if I too should seek allies elsewhere…Dr. Junkenstein, please pay attention. That was a veiled threat and you’ve just missed it.”

“Huh? Oh, right. What?”

The mad doctor looked around him, spying the crumpled and exploded scrap metal of his zomnics littering the castle grounds. Scarecrow, too, had been utterly mangled, and his erstwhile creation was little more than piles of moldering cloth and scattered straw. And past that, he spied a familiar lunk of rotted meat… With a wail, Dr. Junkenstein clambered through the cold puddles, carelessly tossing aside Scarecrow’s mask and picking up a huge severed shoe with part of a leg still attached.

“Nooo! My Monster! My creations!” He clutched the leg in a mad embrace, seemingly caring nothing for the smears it left on his coat. He even gave it a sobbing little smooch, not noticing the severely disgusted look the Witch was giving him. “What have they done to you! Not to worry, not to worry, Dr. Junkenstein will fix you right up. Mei, sweetie dumpling, get the needle and thread! Mei, hurry with the…Wait a minute…Mei! Where’s my Mei!”

His loyal jiangshi was nowhere in sight. With the rest of his army in ruins, had they managed to destroy her as well? Could that untidy rabble truly destroy a creature like his faithful Chinese vampire? There was no trace that his undead assistant had ever been there at all; not a bloodstain or scrap of cloth or even the feather from her cap. Now frantic, he tossed the Monster’s severed leg aside and began digging through the wreckage with both hands, metal bits going flying.

“Don’t worry, lovey, I’ll find you!”

The Witch drifted forward and cast him into shadow, primly adjusting her hat and dodging a piece of zomnic scrap that went hurtling by her. “Calm down, Dr. Junkenstein. Mei-Ling is…Well, she’s still alive in a sense of the word. Although I fear she’s had a bit of a complication that I’m unable to assist with.”

“Wot? Then where is she?” Junkenstein breathed out, then scoffed. So Mei was still ‘alive’, at least. But he had a hard time imagining anything beyond the scope of the Witch’s power. He himself had just been violently risen from the dead again, an occurence that was starting to become all too familiar. “Er, whaddaya mean, even you can’t help her? What complication can’t you fix?”

The Witch cleared her throat, perhaps a little awkward for the first time that the Doctor had ever seen. Her lips pursed, gaze darting almost imperceptibly while he busied himself with replacing his goggles. The comforting shield of blue glass settled over his vision once more, turning about with his hands on his bony hips. For once, he was the one doing the confronting, as the Witch busied herself with the sudden need to inspect her broomstick.

“I have helped her to the best of my ability, but it seems that we have hit a…shall we say, impasse?” she said. “It’s all a rather silly matter, really. And she’s terribly embarrassed about the whole thing, so we’d appreciate you stepping in and taking care of this quickly. I’ll take care of the rest of your servants in the meanwhile. Mei-Ling, dear, you can come out.”

There was still no answer, and Dr. Junkenstein frowned as he peered into the darkness past the Witch’s unearthly glow. “Aw, Mei. Where are you, my l’il pudding pie? There’s naught to worry over now, the magnificent Dr. Junkenstein, the Master of Life and Death himself—” He paused at the Witch’s warning cough. “Er, the Doctor is in, and you know there’s no reason at all to be sheepish. No secrets here. You and I’ve been through so much alrea—”

Something moved in the shadows. A very small hunched figure, seeming smaller than ever, shuffled out of the night. Like a very shy vampiric schoolgirl on her first day, Mei took small little hops forward, scooting slightly to the side to hide behind the Witch’s grandeur. Despite the violent battled beforehand, she seemed to be in relatively good shape. There was a splash or two of blood on her robes, marring the white crane on her chest. One of her slippers had torn and would need to be mended. A visible cut had ruined the cuff of her sleeves, and her hat was missing…although the missing hat was easily explained.

Mei was sporting a severed stump of a neck, and her head was completely gone. Cold, blue-tinted meat was all that was left, with the white vertebrae of bone and the tubes of the esophagus stuck within, their edges too clean to have been anything than the swift single cut of a very sharp blade.

Dr. Junkenstein frowned, rubbing his stubbled chin. “Aw, pookie bear, is that the problem! Nothing to be ashamed of, darl, we’ve all lost our heads now and again. Which way did it go? Who did that to you, anyway? Oh, they’re gonna be in for it now! You just tell me who’s the perpetrator, I’ll show them a thing or two about a thing or two! So, first let’s just find that pretty little skull of yours before we…Hm?”

What was left of the jiangshi’s corpse seemed very upset about the matter indeed, hunching down behind the Witch again. When questioned on her head’s whereabouts, she waved both metallic claws and started making very strange gestures. But with no way to verbalize, she was left to an elaborate game of charades, and the doctor could only squint at her in growing consternation. After a moment, she smacked one fist into the other and held up her taloned fingers.

“Hmmm,” the doctor mused aloud, squinting behind his goggles. “Okay, two words. First word. Okay. Big. Giant. Tall. No, movement? Forward, up…Over. Over!” He cackled in delight as Mei gave him the thumbs up. “Okay second word. Shape. Triangle. Wave. Slope. Mountain. Mountain! Right, right, over the mountain.”

She waved her confirmation and pointed towards a large and rocky peak just outside the castle’s territory, then began gesturing again.

“Squeakies. Bats. Spooky, dark, in the dark. Oh! Right you are, darling! I see, they’re on the other side of that mountain, just outside the mouth of a cave with a bat population, on a rather narrow ledge with a crumbled pile of landslide boulders on one side.” He nodded, then turned and started walking. “All right, let’s go!”

The Witch gave him a startled look. “You got all that from charades?”

“You didn’t? Thought she made it pretty obvious,” he scoffed. “Can’t forget, when I first found her, we spent weeks together with her unable to speak even a lick of the language. And don’t tell them I told you this, but my Monster and Scarecrow have never exactly been much for scintillating conversation either, if you catch my drift. So I spent months and months in that tower, perfecting my beautiful creations and perfecting the art of supernatural language interpretation because none of them could talk to me!”

The Witch slowly lifted one brow. “Dr. Junkenstein, yet again I find myself simultaneously impressed and depressed by your personage.”

The good doctor only busied himself with fussing over his headless jiangshi, puckering his lips and leaning down to plant a kiss right on the ice-cold meat of her open neck. “Not to worry, smoochie. The Good Lady and I aren’t going to let my most ghoulish girl go without her parts for too long. Now a stray foot or arm is one thing, got plenty of replacements for those. But well, awfully hard to replace a head, and yours is the prettiest head in the world. Plus all the things we use it for, ehehehe…” His pale cheeks lit up pink at the thought.

The decapitated corpse placed both claws over her heart as if touched by his words, then waved abashedly at him in a ‘Oh, you!’ sort of gesture before wrapping herself up in his gangly embrace.

Unable to entirely hide her disgust this time, the Witch sighed and rubbed two fingers against her temples. “This would all be so much easier if I could simply resurrect you myself, Mei-Ling. But as it stands, your standing with death was made long before we met. Oh, and Doctor? This is really more of a quick recovery sort of thing. Please simply get the skull back and try not to cause trouble. I…have my eye on the one who did this to her. And I do not want him badly harmed.”

“Like hell!” The doctor’s temper flared, even while Mei tugged fretfully at his sleeve. “Resurrect the rest of my minions and I’ll reactivate the zomnics! I’ll turn our whole damned army after this bloke!”

“Mind your tone, Dr. Junkenstein,” the Witch replied coldly, and something seemed to curdle inside the man’s veins. His scrawny body shrunk and hunched down once more, still clutching covetously at his headless companion. She adjusted her skirts to smoothly lower and sit upon her hovering broom, narrowing her gaze at him. “I shall be tending to the remains of our cohorts. You are tasked with simply finding Miss Zhou’s missing head and bringing it back, with no harm coming to the perpetrator. Are my instructions clear?”

“Y-yes ma’am. Lady Ma’am. But…why wouldn’t—”

“Are. My instructions. Clear.”

“…Yes Ma’am.”

***

He was eager to leave the Witch to her duties, hurrying out of the dark castle grounds with Mei’s corpse hopping in step just behind him. She had always been more quiet and polite than him, but now her utter silence was unnerving. He really did miss her having a mouth…for lots of reasons, really, but if he thought too much about it, he’d get distracted. Best to stick to the task at hand. Limping forward along the muddy kingdom paths, they soon left the destruction behind them.

“I’m still not entirely clear on the physics at work here, darl. Can tell you’re able to see and hear me despite having no eyes or ears attached at the moment, but are you really sure you’re up for this? Er, we could always just ask for the Witch of the Wilds to bring back the Summoner. Now she’s not exactly the nicest, I know, but we could ask to have her teleport us right up to—” He tilted his white-tufted head as the jiangshi made more silent gestures, before he gasped and placed a gloved hand to his chest.

“Well! You don’t have to get so snitty, my dear. I know this is the most urgent of matters, but there’s no need to lose your head—” A black claw whapped him in the arm and he cackled aloud. Snagging her hand with his own, he lifted it upward and placed a few smacking wet kisses to the backs of her knuckles. “No, no, no, just a joke! Just lightening the mood! Just give us a laugh- Er…or a nod- Er…Wait.”

Mei waved both hands, gestured, slapped him in the other arm, and gestured again. But her admonishment seemed to be a playful one, headless or no. Especially when she made several more signs with her curled talons, then grasped onto the front of his labcoat, sliding a hand inside and then down his narrow chest.

Junkenstein gasped. “A reward? Mei! Blimey! You’re lucky the others aren’t around to hear you say all that. You’re a naughty girl, aren’t you? You know how the Witch feels about the PDA. But uh, I mean, we do kinda need your head to…Agghck!” His shriek faded into a reedy giggle as her claws slid a little lower, cheeks going from pink to neon red. “W-well! You know that just returning my lovely assistant’s head to her is plenty reward enough. But maybe, you know, since you’re already offering? Yeah, all right! That puts a pep in my step! C’mon!”

The jiangshi did not need to be told twice. She withdrew wordlessly from his skinny body and followed after him, with Dr. Junkenstein fussing and grumbling as he started looking for quicker paths up the towering black escarpment above them. His attempts to climb were a rather pathetic affair, his peg leg screeching against the rock and his flimsy build doing him no favors. Mei waited patiently to at least let him make the effort, before she outstretched her arms and hopped forward once more.

She scooped him up as one would a damsel in distress, claws hooking under his knees and back. He might have even swooned a little, as the headless corpse of a woman lifted him up and bent her knees…and her movements went from hopping to leaping. She bounded with an agility that she rarely showed openly, the scientist rattling against her chest and clinging onto her as up and up they went. Little pebbles went scattering away from her soft slippers, ricocheting off of boulders and scaling the cliffside as the jiangshi was finally boosted up by an unnatural whirl of white mist. With an artistic little spin, she landed with a soft noise amongst the debris of the struggling pines attached to the perilous mountainside.

Unfortunately, the decapitation had affected her a little more than her body was willing to admit. She landed gracefully, even posing with her charge in both arms…and then promptly tilted straight over with a rattling crash when she tried to take a step forward. Trying to navigate the world without her eyes and ears really attached was not the easiest. Like a felled tree, she just tilted right over and the doctor went with her, his shriek muffled as he landed on top of her in a spray of pine needles and dirt.

Dr. Junkenstein pulled his head out of her bosom, one eye opening warily behind his goggles. Groaning, he staggered upright as his assistant helpfully ushered him up again, swaying to one side and jamming his peg into the dirt. “Ooooh, hold on. Hold on. Too fast, just got resurrected here…Brrp. Okay. Nooot gonna chunder…Oh hell—” He bent double, making gagging noises while Mei apologetically patted him on the back. “Hggh. Hggghhh!”

Luckily, he hadn’t eaten anything on his freshly reformed stomach for him to vomit. The nausea soon passed, and he wiped at his chin and looked around blearily as the two found themselves on the other side of the mountain. The doctor composed himself as best he could, smoothing out his labcoat, and tilted his tufted head as he lowered into his favorite creeping hunch.

“You hear something, sweetie? Think that’s them?”

She did not respond, only hopping after her master as he crept along the dark rocks. Junkenstein soon spotted the faint glow of a campfire, and the shadowy figures lurking around it. Just as his jiangshi had ‘said’, the group of mercenaries and allies had made their camp at the mouth of a cave in the steep hillside. Junkenstein kept his distance, even though anger and hatred rankled inside his ribcage as he spied his hated foes that had just finished killing him and stealing his poor girl’s precious head. He was close enough that he could recognize a few of them; the Alchemist, the Gunslinger, the Swordsman, the Archer… Where the rest had gone, he couldn’t say. He was already outnumbered— and if the others were nearby, massively so.

Mei tugged urgently at his sleeve.

He waved her off and squinted, adjusting his goggles. “I know, it’s not looking good. Too many. Others might be close by, too. And she expects me not to blast them sky high? Really, why would the Witch make this a bloody stealth operation? She knows I’m no good for those!”

Another pull at his coat.

“Why wouldn’t she have sent the Reaper or even that useless Scarecrow for stealthy nonsense…Unless it was a trick and she wanted me to blow up this stealth operation? She’s always been a tricky one. This might be another one of her cunning plans, do you think? Like, maybe she was so adamant about not killing whoever stole your head, because she knew I was going to kill whoever stole your head. I mean, it’s not like I can do anything less. After what they did to you?”

There was a soft movement at his side, though he barely noticed.

He dug through his lab coat, pulling out handfuls of bombs and scrap. “I see it now! I’m onto her game! It’s actually a brilliant plan because it’s such a bad plan! Ohohoho, I’ve got it this time, that’s the rub. So it’s decided, then. We blow up this whole stealth mission, kill everyone as revenge, and then find your head! Nobody steals my pookie pie’s head! Except me! Because that’s different in a much more foreplay sort of way! Dunno which one took it, but we’re gonna find out real quick, we are. The Witch can sort through the piles afterward. Okay, Mei. You go in soft, and then I’m gonna go in real loud. You ready, darl?”

A finger tapped him on the shoulder.

He turned. “Darl…?”

A metallic face peered down to look at him, the metallic joints of its tentacled face clicking very softly below the slitted green gaze, glowing brightly in the shadow of its hood. Orbs bearing strange symbols floated around them. Its pointed fingertip withdrew from where it had politely hailed him, curling by its broken manacles. It was an omnic he had glimpsed only briefly, the ‘Monk’ that the Witch had reacted rather strangely to. And now it was poking him.

“Darkness and shadows be upon you,” the Monk said.

The noise that Dr. Junkenstein made next was not the most dignified one, and he had made a lot of undignified noises. But luckily for him, the ensuing sounds of explosions were quick to cover it up. He flung out both arms, detonating the bombs he’d been sorting through. White and yellow light exploded in a spray of heat and metal, catching both the Monk and the doctor in the blast and sending them both hurtling away from each other as they were flung upward.

To his credit, Junkenstein was very well-versed in explosives. He recovered mid-air, already pulling more mines and his grenade gun from the void of his labcoat. With a scream that was half laugh and half warcry, he sent volley after volley raining down upon the startled group of adventurers. He caught both the Archer and the Gunslinger unawares, engulfing them in a series of blasts as their little drinking session was interrupted in the harshest way. The Swordsman was swifter, pulling his blade in a hiss of steel…but not swift enough, forced into a fire-covered retreat as he leapt away.

Beneath the blue glass of his goggles, Junkenstein’s wild eyes darted to and fro amongst the chaos. Which one of them had Mei’s head? It wasn’t immediately clear. Probably best he just kill them all as planned, then. They deserved it for beheading his girl, killing him, and his Monster, and even Scarecrow. They deserved it for laughing at him. They deserved it for kicking dirt in his face all these years.They deserved it for—

A dart sang through the air, sinking into his chest even as his grenade launcher lifted for another round. His limbs suddenly went limp, body unresponsive as the last of his bombs went bouncing along the ground, sending more caustic smoke and dust into the air. Even through the haze, he saw her…The Alchemist stood with her arm raised and her face grim, her wrist-launcher now emptied of the dart that had buried itself into him.

With another crash, he fell into a twisted heap of tangled limbs and mechanical parts, twitching madly as he tried to force himself to move. He managed to snarl, lips curling around bared teeth, drool practically foaming with his efforts. Oh, the curses he longed to spit at them, but he was unable to do anything but utter a distressed wheeze.

The clanking of weaponry all around him belied his situation to be a dire one. As a group they advanced, no doubt ready to send him to his death yet again. He scraped a glove in the dust and waited for the hail of bullets, blades, and arrows to take him: his mission failed.

There was a whooshing noise as a purple blur hurtled through the air, clipping the Alchemist right off her feet and sending her spinning into the darkness beyond the campfire. Mei landed with more of a stumble than usual, her headless body scrambling to Junkenstein’s aid. Placing her body between him and the mercenaries, she swung both claws in a silent warning.

“Fffhgh mmn nnnnn,” Junkenstein slurred from the dirt, helpfully translating her threat.

“All right, this is getting outta hand,” the Gunslinger grumbled, raising a hand over his weapon’s hammer. “Ain’t we killed y’all enough for one night? We better get paid extra for this bull.”

“What could possibly have possessed you to even attempt to follow us?” the Archer sneered. “You’re both weakened…and one of you is not even whole.”

The Swordsman said nothing, narrowing his eyes suspiciously at the decapitated jiangshi.

The doctor was finally starting to twitch back to life behind her, dragging himself up to one knee and reaching for his grenade gun. Mei signed something, desperately swerving back and forth in front of the downed scientist to keep their foes at a distance. He lifted his head, frowning severely as he watched her urgent game of charades.

“What do you mean you don’t want to fight, schmooples? They got what’s yours! And I’ll take it back from—” He started to reach for his mines, but jolted back a moment later when another wave of nausea and exhaustion overtook him all at once. It was different from the dart, and when he looked up he saw its source. A single shining orb hovered around him, shining with a sinister looking rune that seemed to drain his energy with a poisonous purple glow. “What the hell! Damnit, lay off!”

“Let us all take a calming breath,” the Monk said, hovering in from the darkness. “I believe there has been a misunderstanding. Perhaps if we allow them to explain.”

“Mish mumkin!” The Alchemist joined his side, holding her ribs and looking none too pleased. “I am not entirely sure what explanations we can expect from a madman and a headless vampire.”

Mei waved hurriedly, hopping in the Monk’s direction, and then hopping right back again when the Swordsman advanced upon her with his sword still drawn. He positioned himself in front of his master just as she had positioned herself in front of hers, his blade held at the ready.

“I have already relieved you of your head once tonight, little leech. Rest assured, I will relieve you of your other parts as well if you—”

The Swordsman was not able to finish his threat. Mei was already moving but not towards him, slamming both hands into the Doctor’s chest to keep him back as he tried to lunge forward. Such was his anger that even the jiangshi was faced with a struggle to hold him at bay, her slippers sliding in the dirt as he surged against her efforts. His voice rose once more into demented screeching.

“YOU’RE THE ONE WHO HURT MY LOVELY ASSISTANT?! YOU TOOK HER HEAD, THEN I’LL TAKE YOURS! I’LL BLOODY GO YA! I’LL—”

The Alchemist narrowed her eye at him, catching his gaze and very pointedly loading another dart into place. “Dr. Junkenstein, you’ve been given a rare chance. Have sense for once in your life…lives…and make use of this time. If not for yourself, then to at least translate whatever this poor creature is trying to say.”

The Archer curled his lip. “A waste of our time. Whatever excuse this lunatic and his vampire has concocted to attack us, it matters not. We should do away with them both.”

“I believe that the Doctor is of the genuine belief that we have taken something important,” the eerie omnic Monk said, folding his spindly fingers where he hovered nearby. “I cannot condone dispatching him…this time. While his methods remain enigmatic at best, this time his motive seems to be a pure one.”

Dr. Junkenstein grit his teeth and snarled, but wrapped one arm around Mei and halted in his struggles to get past her. The other snapped up to point viciously in the Swordsman’s direction. “You got a lot of nerve! Now it’s one thing to kill a gentle and innocent girl like my assistant. But stealing from her is entirely another!”

The Swordsman only seemed more baffled and angry than before. “What are you babbling about? I feel no shame in dispatching your vampire, but I have stolen nothing!”

“Explain this then!” The Doctor gestured to the jiangshi’s extremely missing cranium. “Where is it! Stealing a lady’s head while she’s still using it, that’s absolutely low!”

“What? Why should I know where her head went?” The other man scoffed, but slid his blade back into its sheath in another frustrated motion, if only to gesticulate in an equally affronted way. Their pointing grew more aggressive over the campfire separating them. “Likely it fell into your moat or into a ditch during the battle. Go look for it there and cease troubling us.”

The Gunslinger opened his mouth, then shut it again. The Archer gave him a strange look, then turned back to where the Swordsman and the Doctor were still trading barbs.

“Liar! I know you’ve got it! She says it’s here!” Junkenstein looked down to Mei, who made an affirmative motion.

“Then she is wrong! I said I do not have it!”

The Monk tilted his head to the side, tentacled face writhing in subtle consternation. “My student speaks truly. It is not in our possession. Perhaps the jiangshi is mistaken somehow? Though…It is strange that she has not yet been able to find it.”

“She’s gonna find it when you lot finally give it up! Can’t even believe this. I expected better of you.”

“And I expected nothing from you. I say again, we do not have it!”

The Alchemist knitted her brows. “I am reluctant to even say this, but this seems to have been a simple misunderstanding. As a gesture of good faith, perhaps we can simply let you leave to search elsewhere? We are honorable people and have taken nothing from you—”

The Gunslinger coughed loudly, his gaze swerving skyward. All eyes moved to him, and the argument abruptly stopped. Somewhere out in the darkness, an owl hooted just to interrupt the sudden silence.

The Alchemist slowly lifted a hand to pinch the bridge of her nose, cursing softly. “Please tell me you did not.”

The Gunslinger pasted a leery smile on his face, chewing down on his cigar. Lifting both hands in a placating motion, he sidled backward and away from the fire. “So, listen…”

“Please tell me you did not.”

“Well Ma’am, you know how these things go,” he wheedled, leaning down to his bulging supply pack. “I figured, we went to a whole lot of trouble for a pretty damn paltry reward from His Lordship, all things considered. Now I ain’t entirely sure what to make of all these particular…Monsters, and Pumpkinheads, Dragons, Scarecrows—”

“Yeah, well. Not much to make of the Scarecrow, frankly,” Junkenstein snorted, then grumbled when Mei slapped his arm again.

“Uh, so, ya see. I was moseying along after the bloodshed and all, and I thought I saw somethin’ in the bushes there. And I thought to myself,” He unstrapped something inside his pack, holding up a round burlap-bound bundle. “Er, well I thought to myself, I might know some folks who would pay a pretty penny or two for a bona fide trophy from a real Chinese vampire, and she was already dead and all so I thought maybe…”

The straps and burlap fell away, draping open. Mei’s missing head sat like a heavy stone in his palm, her eyes opening and blinking owlishly in the sudden firelight. She brightened visibly at the sight of her body nearby, fanged jaws opening and closing. She mouthed silent words, noiseless except for the faintest little mute gasps from an open throat that was no longer attached to any vocal chords. Her body released its grip upon the Doctor, lifting both arms and starting to hop forward to reclaim her missing piece.

The Gunslinger winced away when Mei’s head screwed her lips to the side and glared up at him. “To be fair, Missy, I didn’t know your head was still gonna be all…alive and whatnot. It didn’t respond when I picked it up or anything, or I never woulda assumed— I mean, all the other vampires I killed before, never had this particular problem.”

The Archer haughtily ran a hand through his hair, nose in the air. “Perhaps if you had actually read a book in your life and done studies on how Eastern vampires actually differentiate from their inferior garlic-fearing counterparts? I have killed more than enough of them to know.”

The Gunslinger bristled, turning upon his fellow mercenary. “Then you should know there’s a lot more to my vampire-hunting than garlic. Maybe you shouldn’t be so quick to brag when your Eastern vamps are afraid of duck eggs and rice. Eggs and rice! Maybe we didn’t even need the Swordsman’s blade, and I could have just chucked a to-go bag at her!”

Junkenstein uttered a shrill giggle from the other side of the camp. “Oh you don’t even know, mates! One time I tried to make her this stew—” He faltered again as Mei slanted her gaze at him. “Uh, nothing. Never mind. Now could you stop flirtin’ long enough to give my jiangshi her head back! Cretins.”

“W-we weren’t…uh…”

Mei snatched her head out of the stuttering Gunslinger’s grasp, hugging it covetously to her own chest in triumph before bounding back towards her Doctor. He flung open his long arms with a grin and she leapt into them, and he cackled and swung her in a circle before leaning down to kiss the top of her head as she lifted it up to him. He beamed down at her as she gently settled her head back into place, straightening it upon the stump of her neck. He only seemed more charmed by her than before. “There she is! Talk about a true beaut.”

The others watched with the usual disgusted curiosity that Junkenstein was so used to, although the Alchemist chanced a small smile.

“In a way it’s actually sort of sweet, how they—”

Dr. Junkenstein pulled a long needle and coarse thread out from his coat, roughly jamming it into the jiangshi’s cold flesh and pushing it harshly through the layers of meat and muscle beneath. Grinning maniacally, he tittered another shrieking laugh as he pulled it taut and began very aggressively sewing the two pieces of her throat back together. Meanwhile, the little vampire flailed and uttered horrid strangled gurgling noises as her head was forcibly strung back into place.

The Alchemist sighed. “Never mind.”

“Don’t listen to them. You look- Hrrrngh!” He pulled the string tight, the stitches sinking deep. “Amazing! There we are, that should help it heal all the faster. How do you feel, darl?”

Mei adjusted her head several times, rubbing at her throat. Her first attempts at words were useless little whistling noises like a distressed guinea pig, but as she finally seemed to line up which tubes went where inside her neck, and she managed a few more hoarse whispers in her native tongue before trying to speak. “C-can you hear me? Hello? Oh! It worked! Thank you, Doctor!”

“The most lovely assistant in all the world! What would I do without you? That’s all right, no answer needed, don’t you strain that pretty voice too hard.” His expression lit up all the more, fussing at the thread end and tying it off. He stepped back and caressed her hair and adjusted the spell paper on her forehead, leaning down over her to plant another kiss to the end of her nose. “Good to have you back proper.”

She uttered an adorable squeak and smiled up at him, dimples just below the dots painted on her cheeks. “It’s such a relief to be able to talk again.”

“Too right! Now, let’s finish blowing up these prats before we head back—!” He reached back to his coat, this time for his gun. But the rattle of weaponry all around him gave him pause, as did the jiangshi’s claws as she grabbed onto his arm to stop him.

“W-wait! It was just a mistake, that’s all. I’m sure none of them meant it. I was still stunned, and even the cowboy man probably just wasn’t thinking.”

The Archer smirked around his bow. “Not an uncommon occurance.”

“All right, I’m just about tired of you steamin’ my beans—”

Both the Doctor and The Gunslinger looked ready to ignite another battle that Mei was not at all prepared for. Her fanged smile wavered, and she clutched onto the lunatic scientist a little tighter, tugging at his arm to urge him back the way they came from. “Listen, it’s been a very long night for everybody, hasn’t it? And…And there’s such a lot of work we need to do back at your lab. And the…you know?”

Dr. Junkenstein was still trying to catch the eye of the Swordsman, who was pointedly not looking back at him. “But that one, the one the Witch was on about. He cut ya up!”

“It’s not the first time I’ve been cut up. And I’m fine now, see? I have my head back. Why don’t we head home! For…you know?”

“But…Huh?”

“Your reward?” She fluttered her eyelashes up at him. She tried what she hoped was a salacious whisper, but with her ragged throat it came out a little croakier than she’d hoped. Still, she tried. “You know? For being so, so good. At helping me.”

Realization hit him like a thunderbolt. His sallow skin went pink and almost as clammy as his vampire as he started to sweat, face twisting into a very particular and stupid grin. Puffing out his bony chest, he pointed at the group of baffled adventurers before him.

“You’re lucky, that’s what you all are. My girl has a soft and tender heart and…oh yeah, soft and tender everything, er…Uh, you’re all pardoned this one time! And only because you gave her back her head without too much trouble. Although you two,” He pointed to the glaring Archer and Gunslinger. “You two piss me right off. But not as much as the guy with the sword. And you,” He shifted to the Monk floating peacefully nearby. “You give me the skeevies, and you got no idea how hard that is to do. And the old lady, you…Well, you’re actually sort of scary too.”

“Charmed.”

He swallowed throatily, twitching. “We’re pissing off. And don’t you dare steal any of my creatures’ parts again, you don’t even appreciate them. Not like I’m gonna appreciate them. Ehehehe.” There was a unified groan from the mercenaries, but Junkenstein ignored them. Looping an arm about the much shorter woman beside him, he turned and began hobbling off towards the darkness. “Anyhow! Damn you all! Blow you all to hell next time, toodle-oo!”

“Have a good night, Dr. Junkenstein,” The Alchemist replied calmly, over the murmuring of the others.

Nobody moved to stop them, and the adventurers watched the strange pair gallavant away together. Once more, the night grew quiet save for the crackle of the campfire and the hush of the insects. Peace returned, and eventually conversation slowly returned after an uneasy silence. But the Doctor and his companion seemed to be gone, having found the strange prize they had pursued.

The Gunslinger chewed on his cigar and merely shook his head. “And they say I’m the oddity…”

The Swordsman said something about more firewood, skulking off into the forest. But he did not bend to scavenge wood from the forest floor, only finding a shadowed place in the already shadowed night. The darkness there could be just as comforting as the cheerful glow of the campfire. He was not the only one who found it to be so. A presence joined him there in the blackness, heralded by no footsteps, gliding through the void.

“My Student,” the Monk said. “What troubles you?”

“Nothing. Merely…the lunatic’s shrieking left me irritable. And I dislike the way the foul little jiangshi looked upon me.”

“The jiangshi was quite polite, considering the state of things.”

“The Doctor, then.”

“…Is it the Doctor’s presence that bothered you, or his words?”

“The man is so addled he can barely string them together. It is nothing.”

“It is not how the Doctor spoke, my Student. It is the truth of what he said. Her gaze has found that which is within you. Do you still carry such thoughts of vengeance and regret? Hers is an old and powerful magic, and she will come to offer you all that you—”

“Then I will deny her.”

“…Will you?”

The Swordsman was silent, gaze downward. After several long moments his head lifted, eyes glinting red even with no light to catch them. He turned away from the Monk, and stepped deeper into the forest.

“We still need to gather firewood.”

“Of course. I shall help you, my Student.”

They moved together into the dark.

***

Elsewhere in the dark, the jiangshi and a rather bedraggled Doctor Junkenstein finally returned to the outer fortifications of the castle. Half-ruined walls and crumbled stone towers were half sunken or in the process of sinking into the muck. The occasional flickering torch lit up the gloom, but the castle and the villages remained locked away and all was silent. The Doctor groaned, pausing to sit on the remains of a low wall, pounding pebbles out of his boot before thrusting it back upon his foot.

“Ooooh my dog is barking. Long walk back, even with you helping me down the steep bits. Not to complain, mind, it’s nothing compared to your troubles! How is everything? Head all right? Stitches holding? Are you sure we shouldn’t go back there and blow them to smithereens?”

“No, I’m sure. We got what we wanted, right? And I think the Witch wants something else from them and we shouldn’t cause her too much trouble. Especially after she was so nice enough as to resurrect you first so you could help me? Although it did take me a little bit to try and get across to her that I wanted you.“

His hairless brows lifted. “My little dumpling! You were the one to ask for me back?”

“Of course. I was so embarrassed when I woke up. Nobody’s ever stolen my entire head before, and I couldn’t even talk to her. She wanted to send the Reaper with me at first, but I said no thank you. Just you. She can understand my language, but…I don’t even need language with you. Nobody can understand me like you can.”

“Got real good at that, just like I said.”

“Plus, you’re a lot more fun than anyone else here. And…” She leaned down to loom over him for once, lips parting to reveal a fanged smile. “You taste a lot better, too.”

The Doctor’s face went heated again. “Aaaha…aaha-ha-ha-ha!” His gloved fingers immediately started groping at the high collar of his labcoat, fumbling with the snaps. He swallowed audibly, the lump in his throat bobbing up and down, and he saw the jiangshi’s keen gaze follow it. Licking at his chapped lips, he tugged the snap free and tilted his head to the side, baring the sweat-dampened pillar of his neck. “W-well! Speaking of! I know what’ll heal that mild case of decapitation quicker than stitches. Hot and fresh, right here!”

The little vampire practically purred, even as she slowly traced one curved claw to his neck, feeling the pulse thundering just below the surface of the straining flesh. “But Doctor…Aren’t you forgetting about your reward? Just for you?”

“P-part of it! This can be part of it!” he practically barked aloud, leaning into her touch. “After all, doesn’t my lovely assistant have to be in tip-top condition before she can assist me?!”

“I should have considered that. I guess…I really should be at my best for you? You make a good point, Doctor.” The very tip of her claw curled a little at the word, scratching at the skin and threatening to break through.

That was not the only thing threatening to break through. He wasn’t entirely sure if it was his love of horrible puns or how the jiangshi was teasing him or a combination of the two, but an erection was already forming a hard lump beneath his coat where he sat. He tried to drag her down on top of it, but she only giggled coyly and pulled away from him. Groaning, he pulled at her robes to tug her back, but she deftly avoided his grasp, hopping several steps towards the darkness of a ruined stairway tower.

Dr. Junkenstein practically somersaulted in his haste to follow, staggering upright and stumbling as he limped after her. She giggled, still just out of reach as she dodged his seeking hands, leaping into the yawning shadows of the tower’s arched doorway. Her laughter echoed around the cold stone walls left to rot so long ago, ringing strangely from the tower’s dark and empty bowels, and anyone else might have thought it eerie. The Doctor did not think so, only redoubling his efforts to chase her.

Something hit him as he ducked into the gloom, where the light was barely enough to see. Just as he was nearly going to trip upon a collapsed section of the stone, the little purple blur hurtled out of the shadows, snatching him up by the front of his coat and dragging him several steps with no effort. His back hit the wall and it nearly knocked the breath from his fragile ribs, but it only made his grin grow wider and his trousers grow tighter.

“My good Doctor…” she whispered in a voice he couldn’t even describe, and her grip on him could have crushed his bones and he wouldn’t have even cared.

“Mmmeiiieiingnh…” he tried to whisper her name as well, but it came out as an embarrassing gurgling moan when her lips pressed to his.

Up on the very tips of her slippered toes, the jiangshi kissed him. Her lips were cold but that hardly mattered, the tip of her spell paper tickling his cheek as she tilted her head. She also smelled a little like burlap, probably from her head being so rudely shoved into a bag for so long, but that hardly mattered either. At least she had her head back to even kiss him with…and to do other things as well.

Cool lips finally pulled away from his, and he choked down air where he’d been forgetting to breathe again. Claws caressed at the side of his face, undeterred by the scratch of his stubble, a five-o-clock shadow just as permanent as the dark circles under his eyes. Instead she scraped a kiss to the side of his jaw, adorable little nose urging his chin upward.

With utterly no hesitation he bared his throat again, and waited. He waited and waited for the bite, but it didn’t come. Instead she playfully tucked her head underneath his chin and just sat there, completely ignoring his irked little growls and whimpers of impatience. She leaned into his chest, still pinning him firmly with his back to the wall, her deft talons dragging up his chest to start plucking at the snap buttons of his labcoat. One by one they snapped open, her hand traveling lower and lower until they reached the belt strung around his scrawny waist. He practically vibrated in helpless excitement, fumbling to help her. But she batted away his attempts, taking her sweet time as buckles clicked and leather hissed through the straps. After a moment, the belt fell down around his legs with a clatter, and his labcoat fluttered down after it.

“Dr. Junkenstein, is something the matter?” she asked, far too innocently.

“Nnngh!” He realized that he was whining aloud and grabbing at her, and he couldn’t help it: his hips and then the rest of him surged forward towards her, stopped only by her grip pinning him to the wall. She giggled again at his misfortune, pressing her chest more firmly against his, but finally had some semblance of mercy as her other hand drifted down, finally gracing the straining bulge in his trousers.

He exhaled noisily as her fingers tickled across him, sliding the gentle pressure of her palm up and down. He grimaced and sweat even at the lightest touch, eyes rolling back beneath his goggles when he felt her unbutton his pants, the downward motion of the zipper seeming to last forever before he was at last freed. No matter how his ears pinkened, his cock was utterly shameless as it sprang loose of its confines, bobbing upward into the night’s chill and into her waiting hand.

His noises echoed strangely around the damp stone walls, little grunts and sighs as she worked him, his breathing already heavy save for when it hitched occasionally at a particularly good one. Eventually his noises were joined by the sounds of wet flesh, when she licked a pool of saliva into her palm to slick his path through. His gloved hand occasionally clawed at her robes, his metal one already sunk so deep into the wall for hold that the rock was threatening to crack. He panted into her hair, hips shifting as her wrist jerked steadily and tirelessly.

“Mmmh! Darl, darl, darl…Please! M-my…” His voice was hoarse, raspy with effort.

“Shhh, Doctor…Let me assist you…”

The pressure built quickly, leaving him slumped against the wall while her tongue lathed at his throat, finding the a pulsing vein and placing her lips there. But still she waited, with the good Doctor writhing under her care, with the patience of one who was not moved by his pleading, focused instead on the precise moment to best strike. And it would be coming soon, as his cock twitched in her hand and his spine ground into the wall and his breathing rasped once, twice—

Her fangs pierced his flesh, opening the vein against her lips. Hot red spurted against her tongue just as hot white coated her palm, turning sticky as she gave him a few final strokes, coaxing out the last drops: even though she knew he barely felt it, not compared to where she sucked on his neck, his body held upright only by her own strength. He was mouthing words, likely nonsense, and his eyes were so far back in their sockets that only the whites were showing, lost to everything in the world except this.

She measured out their pleasures slowly and carefully, pulling his blood and his essence out of his body and into hers. He tasted like unused potential and painful anger and unbridled curiosity, like electricity, as if she had placed the tip of her tongue against a still-hot wire. She liked it: a flavor unlike any she’d had before, before meeting him. His blood always ran too hot, and she took some of his heat as her own…her body radiating warmth where there had been none, skin flushing with new life.

But she knew when to stop, no matter how he begged for more. She wrenched her hungry mouth away from his neck, two thin trickles of red oozing down before she lapped them upward, licking and kissing scarlet-stained lips at the opened wound until it had closed. With the tender care she always gave him, the boneless Doctor was gently eased down onto a nearby pile of rubble where she had thoughtfully spread his labcoat, sitting slumped backward while he shuddered back to life.

“H-hell’s bells…” He awoke to his jiangshi sitting by his feet, arms folded atop his knees, where his trousers had been loosely pulled up around his thighs with her head resting on them. Large, dark eyes swerved up to him as he gasped, and she smiled up at him. He managed a weak grin in reply, head spinning. “Ooooh, that’s my dove. Was afraid you’d…gone? Or…was I?”

“Just stay a moment, Doctor. I’m here.”

“Ah…Yes, good. Just a moment to reflect, is all.” They sat together in the dark, until the haze had cleared and he had control over his faculties again…or at least, as much control as he usually had over those pesky faculties of his. He sighed aloud, shivering as the sweat started to dry on his brow. But the night’s chill was staved off at least a little, when the warmth of her arms wrapped around his waist, nuzzling into his skinny belly. There was still a fleck or two of dried blood by her lip, and it looked most fetching. He always did look good on her.

Sighing happily, he flopped back against the rock. “Does wonders for the mind and the body, all of that. And you’re looking grouse! Knew that blood would help.”

The jiangshi tightened her grip in another fond squeeze, kissing at his belly. “You were right again, Doctor.”

Another grin pulled his lips taut across teeth almost as sharp and shiny as his vampire’s. “Ah! What can I say, lovey? I’m an educated man and you just happen to be one of my favorite subjects.”

“But what about a repeated measures study? It’s just, now I feel so warm and…wouldn’t it just be wasted if we went back to the others and it simply wore off before I could share it? Maybe we have time for just a little more reward? Shall I check your schedule for you, Doctor Junkenstein?”

Mei could barely finish the sentence before he was trying to sit up straight again, jostling her head atop his thighs. “I checked! I checked, schedule’s cleared! Busy man, but I penciled you in. What sort of Doctor would I be if I couldn’t make time for further study, ay?”

“Very generous, Doctor.”

With an unnatural lightness, she rose from the floor and slid easily onto his lap, right into his open arms. They kissed again, but this time her lips were soft and warm with the borrowed life now surging through her. Were it not for the gruesome stitches in her neck, she might as well have been a human woman nestled atop him. But Mei was better than any human woman, better than all the humans in all the world. If it had been up to him, he would have killed them, killed them all, and left nothing but ashes and destruction: a world for his toys and his army and her. Then it would just be him and his jiangshi for the rest of eternity, with him gifting her his blood and her biting him, scratching him, telling him he was good—

The daydreams of bloodshed coupled with her subtle grinding was starting to reawaken him proper. Slyly angling his mechanical arm down her side and groping at her thigh, he pulled her down in a slow rhythm against his front. Dragging his tongue against her jaw and back to her lips, he rasped against her kisses. “Lovely, lovely…Yes, make it warm for me, my lovely.”

He growled when she pulled away, but leaned back when he felt her touches go lower. Her lips moved down his chin, his neck, across the bruises on his chest, his midriff… And then it was warm, all right. He was very well familiar with the eastern vampire’s tongue, how long and wet they could be when fully unwound, but with his absent-minded tendencies it was always a delightful reminder when she used it on him. It coiled about him like a serpent, delicate but strong, pulling his cock from up against his body and up against her open lips.

She kissed it a greeting, slathering that tongue up and down his length while her soft lips circled around the flared tip. Junkenstein was again left a panting mess in no time, leaning back to get a better view of her even though his nerves screamed to grab and take her. Slick with saliva, her tongue squeezed wetly around each inch of him, flesh bulging a little each time she tightened its hold, rivulets of spittle squelching as they dribbled down to his sack and stained the coat beneath him.

For a while he was content to watch her work, but never for too long. Eventually the urge grew too strong, and he reached out to take a hold of the top of her hair, pushing her downward. She moved easily with the motion, her lips opening fully, tongue withdrawing only to guide him into the heat of her mouth. Large, dark eyes gleamed up at him, watching how his expressions twitched madly while he tried to focus.

Warm. Blissful, wet, warm…Lovely! Lovely!

His hand remained draped atop her head, enjoying the leisurely start of a nice hot blowie. She closed and sealed her mouth around the tip of him, sucking gently before pushing him the rest of the way in. She was just as good at this as everything else she did, tongue playing along with soft sucking and the occasional exciting scrape of her teeth. Knelt between his gangly legs, the jiangshi sucked on his member just as expertly as she had sucked on his neck, occasionally toying with that wonderful tongue of hers.

Junkenstein’s tongue was nowhere near as impressive, lolling from his open mouth as he uttered another rattling groan. Chalk up another point for his jiangshi, but she really was superior to a human lady in every way. With no need for air and no need for food as such, she had no concept of things such as choking or gag reflex. Handy, that.

It didn’t mean he couldn’t try. His grip tightened atop her head, no longer resting but actively pushing her down. It urged her deeper, deeper, until her nose was mashed into his pelvis and he was nudging past her tongue, knocking against the back of her throat while she lapped at the sensitive underside of his shaft. And when she swallowed…even through her wounded throat, it squeezed hot and wet and tight and perfect, perfect!

He seized onto both her pigtails and let his dark urges rage. His hips pounded forward, pulling her until there was no more room at all— into her throat, again and again and again. There was no reprieve and no pause, her glasses knocked onto the ground with a clatter as she gripped nigh-painfully onto the insides of his thighs. She welcomed him on every brutal thrust, as he panted and snarled and bent over his undead companion covetously. Alternating between petting the back of her head and yanking on her braids, he groaned praise over the obscene sounds of his cock in her mouth.

“Y-you like it? You like it? It’s good? It’s so good! Yes?” It was simultaneously a demand, a question, and begging desperation: pausing only for half a heartbeat as he stared wild-eyed down at her.

She smiled and nodded, and swallowed him again, and he nearly died for the third or fourth time that night.

“Yes?! Yes yes, YES!”

***

The sounds they made were almost unnatural, together in the darkness of that ruined kingdom. The sounds were so unnatural, in fact, that they did not notice another unnatural sound come upon them. There was a low hiss, something foul and sibilant on a sudden breeze, as the swirling fog was displaced by a darker mist.

The Reaper heard the squawking of that damned irritating Doctor, no doubt busy with some toy or other. There was still work to be done, and the Lady had sent him hence. He would collect the scientist and his vampiric assistant, and they would begin to plan for the next time. Another night full of bloodshed and darkness, never ending and never enough to satisfy any of them: not even the strange human who had cast his lot in with monsters such as them.

“Doctor Junkenstein?”

There was no answer, only more noises from the debris of a tower nearby. It sounded violent. Perhaps one of the adventurers yet lived, and the Doctor was fighting for his pathetic life within? The Reaper would turn the tides, then, and finally finish this—

He solidified, yellow eyes and grinning mouth alight within the enchanted pumpkin that served as his head. Full sight returned to his senses. And he wished it had not.

Junkenstein was once again violating his vampiric servant, frenzied with lust. The jiangshi was knelt between his open legs, stroking up and down his legs while he facefucked her with not an ounce of mercy. Terrible noises were uttered from both their mouths, though his involved much creative cursing and she had no words at all. Neither of them noticed his presence until the Reaper bellowed in surprise and disgust from nearby.

“BY ALL LEVELS OF HELL, DR. JUNKENSTEIN.”

“AAAHH!”

Everyone involved either screamed, or tried to scream through an extremely full mouth. Reaper reeled back, dropping his guns to try and shield his eyes. Dr. Junkenstein fell backward against the stone, while Mei scrambled backward in the other direction. There was a loud ripping noise, and the stitches around her head and neck were popped and pulled apart, scraps of twine hanging loose from her decapitated head once more. Her body collapsed back onto the ground without its anchor, and alarmingly and silently groped at the empty top of her neck. Junkenstein was left holding her loose head, blinking at each other in shock.

Dr. Junkenstein turned with surprising ferocity upon this new interloper, teeth bared and insults at the ready. But he paused when he saw the Reaper already cringing back, still trying to shield himself from the sight of them.

“A little privacy, mate?! I’m in the middle of an extensive study session, here!”

Mei’s head rolled its eyes towards the Reaper helplessly, then opened her mouth a little wider while her body pulled itself to sit upright again nearby. For a moment it seemed that she was trying to decide on being mortified or not. But when Junkenstein only adjusted his grip on her head and continued thrusting, her lips tilted into a cheeky grin and she only wrapped her tongue around him to make him groan all the harder.

The Reaper made a noise of revulsion, his lower half dissolving back into mist as he beat a hasty retreat. “PDA, you two! You know what the Lady said about the PDA! This goes so beyond the rules of Public Displays of Affection, you’ll be sorry y—Auuugh!”

Emboldened, the mad Doctor only moaned in response and actually stood up as he continued driving into the head still attached to his lap, making a mocking display of it. The exhibition of it only heated his blood further, and the jiangshi uttered a muffled laugh even while her headless body sat back and shrugged in a ‘what are you going to do?’ sort of manner.

The Reaper was vanquished, fleeing with a fading roar as he vanished back into the gloom.

Cackling madly to himself, Dr. Junkenstein finally pulled Mei’s head off of him long enough to grin down at her apologetically, features still flushed and glistening with sweat. “Sorry about those stitches, loveykins. I’ll get the better thread for—Oh!”

Mei’s body offered him a little thumbs up, then scooted closer upon her knees. Down by his still-erect cock, Mei fluttered her eyelashes, then stretched her mouth wide open, bidding him welcome. The good Doctor’s expression slacked in surprise, then softened in genuine affection, then grew manic and grinning once again while he took her invitation…and slammed himself home once again.

He could die happy like this. Maybe he would get lucky and he would die like this. He’d die again and again, over and over. They both would, and he’d be happy so long as she was with him. So long as they were together, it would never end. He could think of nothing better.

“M-my lovely! My lovely assistant!”

[verus-veritas]

Senior Picture

By Cris Kane

Shawn had looks. He had a killer body. He had mad skills on the football field.

What he didn’t have was a lot of money.

So while other members of his class were hiring top-notch photographers to take their senior pictures, Shawn had to search for whoever could do it cheap. Around here, the cheapest shutterbug was “Navajo Joe”.

That’s what all the kids had been calling the short, skinny Native American kid from tenth grade since he and his family moved to town a few years back. Navajo Joe’s real first name was indeed Joseph, although no one knew if he was a Navajo or even bothered to ask what his background was. In general, he was just ignored, although behind his back, many of the jocks referred to him as “Nava-homo”. Not only was he small, thin and frail, sometimes staying out of school for weeks at a time for unspecified illnesses, but raised suspicions by excelling at anything artistic. While he never did anything overtly gay (besides being artistic), he did show up with his still camera at nearly every sporting event held at the high school and he seemed to focus his camera most intensely on the handsomest, hunkiest boys. At every football and basketball game, every swim or track meet, every wrestling match, Joseph could be found, hovering on the periphery, zooming in for the best angles. He used a vintage camera that still took photos on actual film and, after he developed the pictures, he would bring them in to the school newspaper for publication.

Shawn didn’t know much about art – or about much of anything besides football, to be honest – but he did know that, whenever his photo showed up in the school paper credited to Joseph, Shawn looked really cool in it. Not that any photographer could mess up terribly when taking a picture of the well-built senior with his shaggy brown hair, intense eyes, boyish upturned nose, firm lips and strong chin. But Joseph seemed to have a knack for snapping his shutter when Shawn was at peak awesomeness. Shawn’s girlfriend Madison had started keeping a scrapbook of all the photos of Shawn that appeared in the paper, so she could feast her eyes on Shawn during those rare waking moments when she let him out of her sight. Her favorite was probably one of Shawn at quarterback during the homecoming game, his facial features in perfect profile against the stadium lights, his right arm cocked back to throw, revealing just how pumped Shawn’s biceps were. Further down, Shawn’s spandex football pants embraced the bulging curves of his glutes and did nothing to hide the generous endowment lurking behind the laces on the front.

Madison was the one who urged Shawn last week to ask Joseph’s services for his senior portrait. When Joseph returned from one of his frequent absences on Monday, Shawn tracked him down in the hallway between classes. At first, Joseph acted afraid he was going to get beaten up when he saw Shawn walking quickly toward him in the hallway. Shawn grabbed Joseph by the arm so tightly that the skin indented and turned white, not returning to its natural cinnamon brown shade for a full minute after Shawn let him go.

“What do you want?”, Joseph mumbled, casting his worried gray eyes up at Shawn.

“Chill, Nava…Joe.” Shawn grinned disarmingly, but Joseph looked suspicious. “I just wanted to say I liked the pictures of me you’ve been taking for the school paper.”

“Oh. Uh, thanks.” Joseph indicated relief that a jock was actually being civil to him, but he still stood with his limbs tense, ready to bolt if necessary.

“My girlfriend loves the pictures too, and she was wondering…well, I was wondering too…if you’d be willing to take my senior picture for the yearbook.”

Joseph’s body relaxed and he smiled with relief. “Why, sure, I’d be happy to.”

“I can’t afford to pay you much. Both of my folks are out of work right now, and I don’t have much saved up, but…”

Joseph waved off his apologies. “I’ll do it for free. It’d be a great opportunity.”

Shawn’s grin widened, revealing a movie-star smile. “For serious? Awesome! When?”

Joseph started to get excited. “How about after school today?”

Shawn shook his head. “Nuh-uh. I got football practice.”

“We can do it after practice is over. We can go out by my house. There’s some great scenery we could use as a backdrop.”

Joseph’s extreme eagerness was starting to give Shawn second-thoughts. He looked down at what he was wearing: a long-sleeved plaid shirt with jeans and work boots. “I’m not sure I’m dressed right for photos today.”

“Are you kidding? You look fabulous!” Inside his head, Joseph was kicking the shit out of himself. Fabulous? He never said that word, but suddenly it fell out of his mouth as soon as he found himself talking to the school’s number-one stud. He knew the jocks’ secret nickname for him, and knew how accurate it was, but he didn’t want to blow this chance by acting like a cliche. He backpedaled. “What I mean is, you don’t want to be in the yearbook looking like some douchebag in a suit and a tie with your hair all fussed over. You want to look normal. You want to look the way you really look. Like you do right now.”

Shawn couldn’t argue with that. He didn’t want to look like some pretty-boy model posed in a studio. “You promise I’ll look bad-ass?”

“How could you not?” How could you not??? Way to go, Joseph, you’re sounding less and less like a regular guy the more you blather on. Just shut up before it gets any worse. “So, after practice tonight?”

“After practice tonight.”

---

Not wanting to be taunted by the jocks, Joseph didn’t hang around the football field or the locker room, but waited in the parking lot until Shawn was done with practice. When Shawn finally emerged, his hair was tousled, his shirt untucked, its top two buttons undone. As Shawn unlocked his rusty 4x4, he asked Joseph, “I don’t know the way, so I guess I’ll need to follow you.”

Joseph looked sheepish. “I don’t have a car. I take the bus.”

Shawn had forgotten how young Joseph was. He unlocked the passenger door and said, “Okay, hop in.”

Shawn swung by his house to grab a few cans of Bud from his dad’s mini-fridge in the unfinished basement. He offered one to Joseph, who politely declined. Shawn chugged two beers as the truck bounced along the dusty backroad that led to Joseph’s place. Shawn had hoped the beer would loosen him up, since he was self-conscious about the idea of posing for pictures, particularly for someone who was probably a fag. Not that he had a problem with gay people. At least not as much as some of the other jocks. Hey, maybe fags take the best pictures because they like what they’re seeing, Shawn thought. Although if that was the case, then Madison should be able to take the best pictures in the world, because she couldn’t keep her eyes or her hands off Shawn whenever they were together.

Shawn liked Madison a whole lot. With her wavy blond hair, big green eyes and porn-actress lips, she was definitely the hottest of the cheerleaders, and she worked just as hard to keep in good shape as Shawn did. She wore her cheerleading sweater to school as many days as possible because she knew just how spectacular it made her boobs look, and it never failed to get him hard when she would leap in the air and her skirt would fly up to reveal her panties and her great ass. It was true she could get clingy sometimes. For the past couple of weeks, it was like she wanted to be with him 24 hours a day. Fortunately she had mellowed out in the last day or two. Musta been her period or something. But mostly, he was happy to be her boyfriend and he knew how jealous the rest of his teammates were that he was the guy who Madison pursued.

They finally reached the top of the hill, where Joseph said meekly, “This is my place. It doesn’t look like much on the outside, but the outside keeps you from seeing how bad it looks inside.” Poor as his family was, Shawn suddenly felt like a millionaire compared to anyone who had to live in a dump like this. It had a sagging roof, a ramshackle porch, windows repaired with duct tape and a front yard consisting of dirt and rusty car parts.

A haunted scarecrow of a man with long white hair and the skin of a brown elephant opened the squeaky screen door and stepped onto the dilapidated porch. He eyed the strange truck with suspicion until Joseph leapt out of the passenger door and shouted, “It’s okay, this is a friend of mine from school.” Joseph smiled over at Shawn. “That’s my father. He’s scary at first, but when you get to know him…he’s terrifying.” Shawn had no doubt. “I’m gonna run in and get my camera. Be back in a minute.”

Joseph dashed swiftly across the pitiful “lawn” and into the house. Shawn was impressed by Joseph’s speed, especially for someone who’d just been so sick he couldn’t go to school. Maybe he should encourage the kid to join the track team next spring. Clearly he needed something positive in his life, and if Shawn vouched for Joseph, he was sure he could get the other jocks to lay off on the razzing and the mean jokes.

Shawn waved to Joseph’s father and called out, “How you doing today?” The old man merely stared, coolly appraising the young man and his truck. As a wind swept through, creating a cloud of dirt between them, Joseph stepped back outside carrying his camera and a tripod.

He sprinted over to the truck and told Shawn to follow him. “Bring your football.” Shawn jogged back to the truck and grabbed a ball from the cab, then cast a look back at Joseph’s father, who remained stern and unhappy.

Joseph scrambled easily up steep paths, increasing Shawn’s admiration for the wiry kid’s athleticism. He had assumed Joseph was just a wimpy art geek, but get this kid in a weight room and give him a year or two to grow, he might even be football material.

When they reached the top of the hill, Shawn was amazed by the natural beauty of the valley around them. “Shit, it’s awesome up here.”

“Yeah, I like to come up here and stare at the horizon and think about my future. The sunsets up here are spectac…they’re awesome.”

“I bet. So what should I do?”

Joseph pointed Shawn toward a rock outcropping near the edge of a cliff. “Stand over there. I can get all the hills and the trees behind you.”

Shawn set down the football, walked over and stood stiffly, facing directly at Joseph, arms hanging awkwardly at his sides. Joseph placed the camera on a tripod and looked through the eyepiece, then frowned. “No, I need you to relax. Be natural.”

Shawn tried but he was still too self-conscious. He fidgeted with his arms, having no idea where to put his hands. Joseph realized the problem and grabbed the football. “Here!” He gave the ball a wobbly toss more or less in Shawn’s direction. Shawn easily snagged it with one hand, although it sent him slightly off balance. A lesser athlete might have toppled over the edge. “Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!”, Joseph yelled.

“No problem,” Shawn grinned back. Okay, maybe Joseph wasn’t football material.

“I want you to grip your ball and stare at the horizon like you’re looking downfield.” Shawn did as he was told. Giving him a prop to hold had made a world of difference. “Turn a little to your right.” Better still. Joseph risked making another suggestion. “Could you maybe unbutton a couple more buttons of your shirt?”

Shawn hesitated. Was this all part of Joseph’s plan? To get him out here and have him take off his clothes so he could have pictures to jack off to? Wait, he was the one who asked Joseph to take the pictures. Stop bein’ such a dick, Shawn thought. He loosened two more buttons, offering a peek at the pecs he’d spent so much time perfecting in the gym over the summer.

Joseph grinned approvingly. “That looks awesome. You ever thought of being a model, Shawn?” Shawn laughed off the suggestion. “I’m serious. I don’t think you appreciate all you’ve got going for you.”

Shawn was starting to feel uncomfortable again, and the buzz from those beers was really kicking in. He just wanted this over with. “Quit stalling and take the pictures, okay?”

Joseph nodded and looked through the viewfinder. “Did you ever hear that old story about how when the first Native Americans saw cameras, they refused to let anyone take their picture because it would steal their soul?”

“Yeah, I think I heard something about that. I always thought it was just bullshit.”

“Yeah, me too. Funny thing, though. I asked my father about it. And you know what? He told me it was true.”

Joseph snapped the shutter on the camera and the clicking sound reverberated in Shawn’s ears, repeating and repeating like it was caught in a loop. Shawn’s skin tingled all over while his muscles stiffened. Inside, he felt panicked as he realized he couldn’t move any part of his body. It was as if he had become frozen in time at the moment Joseph took the photo. His eyes remained fixed on the horizon and he couldn’t move them in any direction. He suddenly felt an incredible desire to itch his nose, to lick his lips, to scratch his balls, to do ANYTHING physical, but he was powerless. As if that sensation weren’t disturbing enough, he suddenly felt as if he were drifting out of his body – almost as if he were seeping out of his pores and becoming a vapor. Eventually, when he felt his entire being had escaped the confines of his body, he seemed to coalesce, his spirit – his soul – shrinking, becoming denser until it seemed to converge into a single particle that zoomed at light speed toward the lens of Joseph’s camera. He was disoriented as his very being was warped through the heavy glass of the camera’s lens until he was finally trapped inside the camera itself as a shapeless entity.

“Can you hear me, Shawn?” The voice was booming and echoey, like Joseph’s voice but heard from a long distance away in a deep canyon.

Shawn’s trapped being, or whatever you wanted to call it, could somehow hear the voice, and he discovered that he could psychically “speak” back to the voice, despite no longer having a tongue or a mouth. “What did you do to me?”

Joseph’s camera remained on the tripod, while Joseph sat beside it on the ground, eyes closed in a meditative state so he could communicate with Shawn’s trapped soul.

“My father taught me how to capture the souls of others in my camera, then teleport my own soul into their bodies.”

“Are you shitting me?”

“You’re stuck in a camera, Shawn. Does that seem like I’m shitting you?”

Although his soul had no eyes, Shawn could somehow look out through the lens and perceive his body, still standing frozen in position on the cliffside. “Why are you doing this?”

“First of all, because I can. I mean, if you had a choice to be either me or you, wouldn’t you choose you? Second of all, so that I can support my family.”

“Doesn’t look like you’re doing a great job of that so far,” said Shawn’s snide disembodied voice.

“I’m still only learning. But I’ve been on the lookout for a body that I could really do something with.”

“So all those pictures you took at the games, you were stealing people’s souls?”

“No, I have to concentrate to make it happen, so I only steal the souls that I really want. Like Madison’s.”

“What? You did this to Madison?”

“Yeah. A couple of weeks ago. I got her alone after cheerleading practice and asked if I could take her picture. And, zap, she was trapped in the camera just like you are now, while I took over her body.”

If Shawn’s soul had a head, it would be swimming. "So, wait, for the last two weeks, Madison…”

“Has been me, that’s right.” Shawn could hear a wicked smile in Joseph’s voice. “Every time you kissed her, every time she jerked you off, every time she blew you, that was me.”

Holy shit, Shawn thought. He had wondered why Madison had been so eager to give him blow jobs lately. “That’s sick.”

“I got the impression you enjoyed it at the time.”

“You did that just so you could have sex with me?”

“Not exactly. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed being so close to you, but being stuck in a straight girl just felt…icky. No, I had to use her to convince you to let Joseph take your picture. You would never have asked ‘Nava-homo’ to take pictures of you if your girlfriend hadn’t said how hot you looked in his photos. Once I – well, Madison – had planted that idea in your mind, Madison’s soul went back into her body, with no memory that anything unusual had happened to her, and I returned to school in as my dumb old self.”

Joseph’s body began to shake violently, as if something were escaping it at a rapid speed. Instantaneously, Shawn’s body began to vibrate. Joseph felt his spirit overtaking Shawn’s frame, his lifeforce oozing its way through Shawn’s bones, his muscles, his brain. The transition from his own scrawny body into Shawn’s was overwhelming to Joseph. While his training period had allowed him to enter other bodies that were larger than his, including his own father’s, none had previously possessed the strength, the poise and the confidence of Shawn. As Joseph acclimated to his new shape, the body began to move, balancing itself quickly before it could topple over the cliff. He clutched the football in his hands and had a comforting sense that Shawn’s body mechanics and agility were still intact even without Shawn’s soul. He glanced down at the gap in his open shirt and admired the well-honed musculature underneath. He lifted a mighty fist and appreciated how the folds of fabric stretched and strained over the pumped biceps. Taking over Madison was a means to an end. Taking over Shawn was Joseph’s wet dream. Shawn’s cock expanded to a rock-hard eight inches just from Joseph’s thoughts about what he would be able to do in this body.

Joseph looked over and saw his body collapsed on the ground beside the camera on its tripod. He walked over, enjoying the swagger that came automatically with this body, and spoke softly into the camera. “Shawn, I can’t hear you any more, but you should still be able to hear me. I’m not sure how long I’ll be in here, but don’t worry, my father will make sure nothing happens to you until I return. And I promise, I would never let anything bad happen to this body.” Joseph placed one of Shawn’s hands under his shirt and rubbed his smooth tanned skin.

Joseph, as Shawn, easily flung Joseph’s inert body over one shoulder and grabbed the camera and tripod with the other. He walked back to the house and left the camera and his old body with his father, then strode manfully back to the 4x4. He got into the driver’s seat and roared the engine to life. He had driven in enough other bodies by now that he could practically take a driver’s exam if he wanted to. He waved goodbye to his father, who could psychically make out the muffled screams of Shawn’s soul inside the camera.

Shawn did not show up for school the next day, and his parents told the school that he had never come home the night before, although his father did note that some cans of Budweiser had gone missing. No one had seen Shawn when he drove off, and his 4x4 was missing. Shawn’s girlfriend was questioned but she couldn’t think of anything that might have caused him to vanish, although the police found it suspicious that her memories of the past two weeks appeared to be astonishingly vague.

Joseph also did not show up for school the next day, but nobody noticed much. People were so used to him being out sick that this attracted no undue attention. He wasn’t a very memorable kid.

About a week later, Joseph’s father received a letter from California, in which Joseph described his adventures so far. He had ditched the 4x4 fairly quickly, to avoid being spotted, and with the help of family members scattered across the country, had made his way to the coast via various forms of transportation. He had already had meetings for possible representation as a model and hoped to be able to start sending checks back home soon. (There were other things Joseph planned to do with this body to make some extra money – things that Shawn would never have done and which Joseph’s father never needed to hear about.)

Just in case the police ever connected them to Shawn’s disappearance, Joseph’s father burnt the letter as well as a photo that Joseph had enclosed. It showed “Shawn” lying on a California beach in white shorts, hair clipped into a buzz cut and newly bleached to platinum blond, his softball-sized deltoids and biceps practically bursting through his golden skin.

In the photo, he was staring at the horizon, pondering the bright future ahead of him.

Source: “Senior Picture” by Cris Kane on Gay Spiral Stories

[mikhaelkosanik]

Chapter 1. (Google translate)

The loud splash of water did not stop for an hour. This was alarming. The daughter had not previously locked herself in the bathroom for such a long time. Especially on a weekday.

The usual morning. We had breakfast, discussed plans for the coming day.

  Sluggish sleepiness, my husband almost fell into a new dream while I was drinking coffee, and my daughter sadly picking breakfast with a fork.

I knew that Rina scored a very weak point for the last test in history.

  This did not surprise me, even more - I expected such a result. She could not draw conclusions, she could not reason and freely operate on what she read.

The maximum is to memorize dates and main events from the guide before the exam.

Sometimes I helped, discussing an event. This made it possible to obtain grades from "C" to "B". There was not one above the last. And then, for the sake of this achievement, Rina did not sleep for several nights over textbooks and didactic materials.

“Was she upset about this?” It’s not like I’ve been worried about this before. ” - I thought, not paying due attention.

“C” is not so bad anyway: it's not “F”. Daughter's talents also extended in a completely different sphere. She was quite enough to get the minimum points in the main subjects. And on profile problems never arose.

“Maybe some problems with classmates again?” - a new round of thoughts made me sad.

  This has already happened and my husband and I were most afraid of it.

But the daughter’s friends didn’t tell us anything, and they will be the first to complain if they offend our child. Stubborn girl! After all, it will not say anything until the very last moment, when it will be useless to hide and lie. I really have nothing to reproach her with. She just went to her father.

As soon as breakfast came to an end, it was time for fees.

Rina went to the bathroom, saying that she wanted a little tint.

And although I was surprised that at thirteen the girl was using makeup - I could not refuse: the makeup looked quite natural - without flashy colors. Means at the disposal of the daughter also do not say that there are many: mascara, tone, lipstick and blush. That's all the makeup.

As soon as the door closed, for about twenty minutes neither I nor my couple paid attention to the sound from the bathroom, doing their own business, which was enough in the morning: put the dishes in the sink, check the daughter’s bag, didn’t she forget what, to pack herself, sort the garbage and send to the utilizer all edible waste.

But time passed and it became strange that the lapping did not stop.

̶ Rina, you’ll be late for school! They will again scold. - My husband knocked on the door, trying to understand what had happened.

I still assumed that Rina was upset about something and did not want to tell us. And with water, it just drowns out its sobs.

She is a teenager and the like in the order of things. We tried to take mood swings for granted.

  - Rina? - Adrian after the third attempt began to worry. - The guys are waiting for you! Didn’t you forget?

I recalled that on the way to school Rina met two bosom friends and together they discussed lessons or TV shows. Sometimes the guys gave our girl something to write off in general subjects. At least if the questions coincided. It also happened that Rina helped if she needed to draw or rehearse something.

The knock on the door became louder each time, interspersed with the ongoing lapping. This already guarded me myself: I couldn’t hear Adrian Rina, even taking into account the noise.

And yet, somewhere, the hope glowed that the excitement was not justified.

While my husband tried to reach out, I straightened my tie in front of the mirror in the living room. The habit of checking out even the smallest trifles in clothes has remained with me since childhood.

And in life, she came in handy to me many times. A neat-looking attorney always in court is more credible than a sort of slut. The latter is generally carried out from the courtroom with slanting glances, although they will not say anything out loud: education and respect will not allow it.

In addition, unlike Adrian, my work day was just beginning and I did not want to be late.

Of course, through the mirror, I saw only the hallway and closed doors of our bedroom with a bathroom, near which Adrian still stood.

Once again I looked around the living room with the corridor adjacent to it.

Everything that surrounded us now had its own history. It sounds strange, but I always appreciated such things. And sometimes they were sorely lacking in our lives. Only one city from our past was worth it! Pretending to be old, but in fact, only half a century as it existed.

  - Rina !? - after the fifth time, Adrian was already beginning to seriously worry. - Eric, where are the keys? - Finally the question followed.

When buying a house, we were given only one set of keys. I had to contact the workshop, where they mixed up the order and instead of one copy they made four. We kept unnecessary as a last resort, because no one is safe from loss.

Now the thought came to me that Rina lost consciousness and she urgently needed help. And this happened before, but the daughter did not lock herself, and everything ended well. We managed to help.

  - As always. Look in the drawer.

I myself went to the bathroom door:

- Rina?

  Still, only a splash of water was heard.

Then everything happened so quickly that I did not even have time to come to my senses:

Adrian took out the keys, opened the door and ...

  We froze from what we saw. I would never have thought that the world in the blink of an eye would narrow to one room and what was happening in it.

Opposite the sink was our daughter. Drops of blood dripped from her hands. We guessed what had happened on the sink, stained with red traces, and a scattering of black and red specks on the floor.

Inside moths swarmed from what they saw!

In a state of shock, consciousness betrayed the thought that Rina had started having bouts of her illness and she, frightened, locked herself up without saying a word to us.

But the thought quickly went out: on the sink lay an office knife! Also covered in blood.

And the wounds, as far as I could see, did not look like ulcers or necrosis, as shown in medical brochures.

Next came the idea of ​​a suicide attempt. The work left its mark and I couldn’t lose a single option!

But why? Neither I nor my couple could have thought of such an attempt! Yes, and what is the motive? It doesn’t happen that a person just so decides to die, no matter how pessimistic he is!

Moreover, suicide is a sin, and Rina knew it very well. For her, the Bible played an important role in life, so what she saw was almost like an unsuccessful attempt to commit suicide.

I had to quench this idea.

Adrian was the first to recover from shock. I rushed to my daughter, intercepting the mutilated hands. I blinked and saw how he quickly pulled out elastic bandages from the upper cabinet and began to wind them, something chattering.

Due to the fast fussy and clumsy movements from the shelf where the first-aid kit was lying, several medicine bubbles fell.

There was a loud roar.

From the blow, one of the bottles cracked, causing the sour smell of hydrogen peroxide, mixed with blood, to immediately hit the nose, which caused the latter to turn from nettle into a not beautiful foam.

  - Lord, Rina! - Adrian could only squeeze out, making sure that he put in plaits and bandaged all the wounds.

After he hugged his daughter tightly, trying to calm himself.

So my loved ones stood from about 5 minutes: the husband was on his knees and his daughter stunned in his arms.

What happened scarecrow! This is not taught in courses for parents, this is not spoken about in the media! And ordinary people prefer to keep quiet.

  - What for? - Recovering, I still decided to approach.

I hardly managed to formulate even this question. Too unexpected were the actions of Rina.

The daughter shrugged indifferently, slightly freeing herself from her arms.

At that moment I saw a terrible, not blinking look and a strange expression on my face. Emotions at this moment overwhelmed my skinny little body and not strengthened soul of my child!

It seemed as if wounding in the order of things and the like had been done before. Again, something fluttered inside. It even seemed that necrosis began with me!

I had occasion to see a similar look: the work too much affected my perception: well-adjusted, pedantic, looking for any clue.

  But this is the look of an adult! Not a little girl at all! The gaze of a man who fell into opal when there is nothing left to lose! A look saying: “let the world go to hell!”

I carefully took my daughter's hand and examined the bandages through which small specks of blood appeared. I had to bandage almost the whole arm to the shoulder. Almost to the edge of the rolled up pajamas sleeve. Good girl, I tried hard!

The only thing that surely reassured me a little was - judging by the traces that appeared, the wounds were applied horizontally ...

“This is not a suicide attempt!” - I reassured myself again, trying not to betray excitement.

After that, I tried to feel my hand and realized that the wounds were deep enough, despite the fact that they were made with the usual cancellous knife.

For each touch, Rina jerked her nose slightly, apparently in pain.

  - Go to your room! - finally said Adrian, removing his daughter and finally recovering.

Then after a pause, he added in a stern voice:

  “I don’t know why you did it, but it’s unacceptable!” Do not dare to do this!

  This severity from excitement hardly sounded convincing.

Neither I nor my couple understood the motives of our child’s action. Where to start, we also had no idea.

Rina shrugged again and, lowering her sleeves, went to her room, closing the door. Well, I didn’t lock myself as in the bathroom now. At least the sound of a click did not follow the slam of the door.

As soon as her daughter left, Adrian ran a hand through his long hair and looked at me. In this view, a whole storm of emotions was read, and only one question:

  "What do we do?"

  - You need to see a doctor, then a psychologist. - I voiced the most reasonable thing that came to mind.

It's too late to panic: it all happened.

- Can you live without me? I added, turning and leaving the bathroom.

I was almost late. And although the incident jarred me, I could not take my leave.

  “Adrian will definitely not get enough sleep” - the last thing that sounded in my head as soon as I headed up the street.

  Instead of rest, her beloved will have to spend a day in the hospital, and then try to talk to her daughter. I recalled the saying:

  “Parents have no days off.”

How to respond to what happened after the doctors remained a question.

No apparent motives, no reason! What did the daughter want to say like that?

The more I thought about what had happened, the more I could not believe that such an act had no motive. Definitely have it! But where to look?

At first I decided that my daughter so wanted to skip school.

But this motive had to be dismissed almost immediately: The control would have to be written anyway. Sooner or later.

Problems in the classroom and with teachers at the daughter were also not observed.

She spoke closely with friends. Hobbies also brought pleasure. I know for sure! Otherwise, Rina would not go to additional classes in the studio.

The rest of the day was crumpled and messy for me. I tried to immerse myself in work, but I did not succeed.

Instead of thinking about another theft and similar precedents, I returned to Rina's act. Thinking about what had happened, I almost confused the files with the files and did not send the evidence one by one to a completely different meeting.

A judge would be shocked by this: a criminal case was received at a civil meeting. I noticed the error well before transferring the folder to my colleague.

And yet I could not understand why. Why now?

The more I asked these questions, the less I understood what was happening. Well, the girl could not immediately decide to start harming herself. And pain from wounds is a very, very unpleasant thing.

In the evening at home, I also did not receive any answers.

  Adrian never managed to talk to Rin, no matter how hard he tried. And he knew how to do it over a cup of cocoa or watching his favorite series.

Until recently, we tried to support our daughter in everything.

The incident said that something out of the ordinary happened. Now I was one hundred percent sure - you can’t do without the help of a psychologist!

Rina, as in the morning, continued to remain completely indifferent to everything around. She refused to watch her favorite show, leaving the room on the return from the clinic.

By evening, neither strength nor appetite appeared.

They didn’t have enough time to sit with us at the table during dinner, after which they again forced us to return to our room without eating anything.

  We were left alone. The table in the kitchen was located far enough from the nursery - they would not have heard the conversation.

At this point, Adrian said that during a visit, Everplace made a very unpleasant discovery:

When the doctor removed the bandages to examine the wounds, traces of old scars became visible. Scars that neither I nor my couple panicked in the morning.

So, still, Rina had done this before! My guess is correct!

The husband did not describe what he saw, although I understood that the little one, as her husband called her, did a good job with a knife. Most likely, these scars will remain with her for life.

  - I was advised a psychologist specializing in our situations. - Nervous said the beloved, handing me a sheet from a notebook. “I made an appointment for tomorrow.” You have a day off.

To shift communication with a psychologist who is possibly working with the Protection of Family Values ​​on me is another idea. According to Rina’s documents, a stranger is for me and this will quickly come up. Many questions will immediately arise, to which it will be difficult to give more / less adequate answers.

But because of what had happened, I could only agree.

Hugging Hadrian, tried to console him. The husband was very afraid of visiting a specialist. I could understand him.

After the last meeting with the representative of the Protection of Family Values, who hinted that he knew our secret and sooner or later we would have no choice, I would not go myself.

  - Everything will be fine. “A careful kiss on the cheek.” - We can handle it.

  - Yeah. - Sad agreement and drooping shoulders spoke for themselves.

  - I do not believe that our girl did this for no reason! - It remained to add to encouragement. “You yourself know, Rina is a fun song.”

Unbeknownst to ourselves, we moved into our bedroom. Sitting on the edge of the bed, we just sat for a long time, hugging each other.

It turned out to be extremely difficult to think about what happened.

The upcoming meeting with the specialist was no less a challenge for us:

We are used to the fact that recently, the bodies of the PFV have been following us closely. There were plenty of reasons for them: they are not officially married and are considered a dysfunctional family, which will be registered not today or tomorrow. It’s good so far that we have been protected by the constitution and the right to privacy. So it was possible to fight off attacks.

In addition, evidence for the “Defenders” could not be collected, and so far we have been out of their sight. Although, I must admit, these guys tried. They guarded us on the street, molested Rina in the hospital and school.

And although communication always remained within the framework of the usual dialogue about the needs of the daughter, this did not console. If they need to - they will dig the earth! So seize that the bulldogs envy!

One could only hope that the psychologist and, in fact, could understand our situation.