#the show doesnt make any sense or care to be examined and what is there is kinda gross

[outoforderaro]

ok like. (edit: ok im v frustrated about this actually. like fuck. i really like these games and id hate to think ppl think this is representative of them, mainly of their political nature) @grammarpedant

its a bad adaptation imo, bc it changes the license, which whatever thats adaptation gripe 101, but a) why and b) it makes things confusing. why set it on the west coast, but then change up the brotherhood of steel (theyre far more catholic which is odd and just makes them v space marine, but they dont use energy weapons but those don't seem to exist anyhow and they have no motivations or purpose. or women.) they blow up shady sands and get rid of the ncr (kinda?), theres no super mutants. they bring up new vegas at the end but like. theres no ncr, is there caesar's legion? a battle for hoover dam? and these things are important like a main character blew up shady sands to prevent factions but then how does new vegas fit into this. why didnt he blow up definitely-not-megaton filly. theres lots of things that arent clear bc theres canon divergences around them. the timing of when shady sands was bombed for example, at times seems like it's bc theyre throwing the timeline around.

also its characters are bad. like. characters change their minds in the middle of scenes. like one character comes with another to a vault, thinks its creepy. they talk to a guy with one eye in the center of his face and are weirded out. second character is like "ok yeah now i think this *is* weird" and first char is like "thats not weird" and is now ok?? or hey same character, that makes an arc defining choice to let a guy die bc a knight should have better morals and make the world a better place a) treats the guy who comes in as "his" new squire the same shitty way he was mad about, and b) steals the power source from the vault and is reluctant to give it back. characters just go to the right places bc thats where theyre needed. lucy is just ok with things after objecting once, mainly. lucy at one point asks max a question about the bos and he's like ha yeah that is silly instead of having an actual answer like someone that effectively grew up in it and reveres it would have. bc its a bad show, and the bos doesnt have the reason they do it bc that prewar tech doesnt exist!

i think the action is bad. mainly its ok just loves being gory, but i hate that the ghoul character's fight scenes are entirely "everyone lines up to get killed" type. even when he's fighting a bunch of army dudes they cant touch him its just uninteresting for the show to be like. "he has plot armor. he's fine" like make ppl worry about that! will he be?

the effects are generally v good, but the cgi deaging they use for a guy at one point is so horrendously bad. they shouldve just gave him a shave and a wig and itve been a thousand times better, just get the point across that its the same guy. also same character gets into a power armor and it looks ridiculous idk how they fucked that up

none of the stuff that happens matters. they set up the premises, establish the players and the macguffin (solely as a mystery item of value. it doesnt make any sense when you learn what it is) the dog doesnt matter besides referencing a dog from one of the games. ok. nothing a character does effects their arc besides making the next part happen. theres no arcs bc like. does lucy start to do things "the wasteland way"? ig but its just she needs to do the next thing in the script really. and thats a fucking shame bc itd be a great dynamic. fuck! you can do the games pacifist! talk people down or reason with them to get what you want. itd be a great angle for the show. max has nothing going on really. cooper's just doing a murder tour ultimately and we dont find out he wants anything until the v end. what if he'd talked about knowing the maclean name. or anything. max and lucy have what i call static cling romance, where they just rub two characters together and now theyre in love. nothing happens in this show bc theres no point in anything, and they refuse to get into anything bc theres nothing there. hollow show!

the worst part, that actually has me mad tho is the politics of it. it really is what puts me off the most, why id say not to watch this. the vaults are "stupid liberals" type things. like "oh we'll rehabilitate these raiders that tried to kill them by teaching them Kant and calculus" type jokes, where no the "right thing" to do should be to kill them. there's this weird element to the casting where its like "everyone is welcome in the american fascism" its odd. lucy's kindness is naivete and must (will) be driven out, the right courses of action are to shoot first and take. she never gets to solve things non-violently. they make the ghouls reliant on a drug, but its just to have people act like theyre either having withdrawals or an episode, after which they become violent and must be put down. vault-tec is an exceedingly rich company that owns most things, but the show is being produced by amazon so ofc they can only be cartoonishly evil, really. evil bc they love being evil like a captain planet villain dumping poison in the river. its toothless. the "good man (gone to far)" is the cigarette smoking whiskey drinking manly dog having actor thats not here for this commie horseshit, becomes the too cool cowboy that solves his problems with the gun. nobody in the wasteland matters and these strangers are dangerous. the games are really political, and like how the racism and nationalism of the prewar us led to this. how war, war never changes, that despite technological advancement wars are still fought over resources and propagandized through fear, etc. and they drop that line twice and its bullshit each time.

the fallout tv show is really bad, and not in a fun way, but its getting good reviews apparently, and im kinda mad about it honestly

[cosmik-homo]

hi :) i would like to hear about 2s physical/social presentation if you fancy👀 :)

I CANNOT be coherent atm and i am doing this rocket speed cuz i need to go to slepe but

Its like. sooo gender dyspraxia to me. which is how i refer to the ways dyspraxia kind of effects my sense of self like. my own personal philosophy recently is. I'm gonna use a weird example cuz it's partially when i codified this thought but one time I was having lunch on an airplane. I know as someone with dyspraxia eating in a very limmited physical space- and rice, with a fork- while having a drink can open- is going ot be a careful buisness so i start setting up carefully everything as i want it and then im like hey, what the fuck. im already at this point, right, and i add to it an honestly black-and-white movie style, donald duck style, spread paper towl and excited hand rub in my seat, right? you get to the door of the clownhood. go in.

and it's like. I'm sooo obsessed with the bow tie that's just a cloth bow held to the shirt with a safety pin. that IS what gender dyspraxia is like. the signifyer and the act of the signifier are seperate things and the act is A Whole Thing I Can't Quite Do so i'm doing away with it, all i need is the symbol anyways. and with a bow tie! a symbol of, like,

Quirky Officialness, right, this IS an "im being somewhat serious here", its not casual. but the complete disregard to the. tying of the bow tie and the proper form of it and the, yknow. all he wants and needs is a floppy little bow cuz he's not doing this to be looked at, hes doing this cuz he wants to wear one. and that's an aspect i think really brings the final balance to the whole. "silly and smart and playing the fool and also an idiot" web. he straight up doesnt, care about dignity or respect as much and in the way some other incarnations of the doctor do- especially one or three. hes not really bothering making many shows of force he doesnt want to; he isn't trying to impress anyone; literally look at Power Of The Daleks. "how do we know you are the real doctor?" asks ben. "are you the real examiner?" ask the people finding out he isnt. "lmao. lol" says two, trying to focus on the daleks.

so it's like the thing with the whole. Modus Oparendai, clever clown, is it afacade blah blah is that Outward Wise he's just chilling and much prefers outlandish disguises/ overdoing roles (war games commander impersonation?) to actually trying to ever adjust his Real self to a situation. he Wont mask any of his goofy and if a situation needs Something Else he won't fold on that, he'll just go in a new direction.

and THEN the other half of the equation is his, negotiation-y, people-y attitude to problemsolving, which shows quite well in the three doctors and enemy of the world but i think is most, summarized with "Human beings, jamie, are always in reach of other human beings". he Interacts with the enemy, either to bring them to his side and try to solve problems interpersonally- his soft demeanor with ben in macraterror is suchhh a moment for me- or to learn them/ their weakness, to connect with them to put ideas in their heads or decieve them. and since being underestimated - or correctly estimated for his physical capability which i feel a lot of DW media does accept as Lesser Than Later Doctors- i mean this positively im cheering and clapping- WORKS to gurther his methods, and being regarded as soft frivolous harmless clown man works for Good connections too- earning peoples trust and the likes, as well as like. bonding with victoria after she just lost her family. Surprise Child Aqquisition. the lines betweeen being yourself + (On Purpose) sometimes blur.

but yeah in macra terror he is like WHO has EVER needed shined shoes ew. so i think theres definitely osme Autism as well on the comfort level; he likes the same kind of clothes and they need to be comfy to him but also there is a whole, idea connection to it. hes chasing fun hats, yknow? he wants to enjoy the way he is in the world and the way he presents and he will learn to work with or around what people think.

[yanderemommabean]

concept: Ezrol with a much weaker demon s/o? Like straight up physically weaker than a human. Imagine Ezrol meeting this little demon who doesnt care at all about power + doesnt even know who he is. Homeboy is just vibing with reading instead. The idea of the Ezrol, of all people, falling head over heels for this soft spoken demon, whose head is always in the clouds, is funny af to me.

Ezrol: I am the most powerful entity this world knows.

Them: Hm? Does that mean I have to call you sir? (not even looking up from their book)

Ezrol: (Already smitten) Yes.

(Srry bro, got a case of the brain rot, hope you agree >w<)

Ezrol swipes his white hair over his shoulder as he peers down at the lesser demon, eyebrow quirked at your remark. “Do you have any idea who you’re speaking to? I could kill you with one snap of my fingers if I so wished!”. 

The audacity! Don’t you know who he- 

“Yes, so can a million other things. You’re not special. Many other beings carry the power to kill me, sir”. 

Ezrol stands, stunned, and says nothing as he examines the demon before him. So fearless, uncaring to authority, and more focused on knowledge and understanding the world than cowering to his status. 

It was oddly refreshing. He isn’t used to anyone showing him the same attention as commoners unless it’s his brother, who annoyingly loves to act uncouth and obnoxious whenever it shows to annoy Ezrol in the slightest. 

What could be said? If you don’t care for his status, and clearly don’t care for the many ways he could kill you, perhaps he could observe you more? Study you a bit? You’re such an odd case that he can’t simply walk away perturbed by your comments. 

“I see…Such an odd way of thinking…I think I’ll study you more”. 

You shrug your shoulders, still only moving your eyes to read the pages in front of you as the demon king spoke. “Just don’t be a nuisance as you do so, and I'll happily let you. Now shush, I’m learning about the odd human practices of today”. 

(I hope this little snippet makes sense sksks i kinda panicked typed -Mommabean)

[dianthe715]

felix has never lied

hear me out

in all of felix’s tactics, he never actually lied in the traditional sense. he used his charisma and people skills to make literally any of his lies sound normal, and omitted necessary details. lets review his time with the new republic!

starting in season 11 -

- “seriously? come on man! everyone knows about you guys! you’re heroes!” even though he says this was a lie, it actually wasnt (of course he was probably just saying that to mess with them). dr. grey quoted the article written by dylan andrews that addresses the reds and blues taking down freelancer, and it was evident everyone knew them, and saw them as heroes. no lies here!

- he said completely straightforward what was going on on chorus. and then he was honest and said it’s not his home, he’s literally only there because he’s being paid to bring in weapons and supplies to the new republic. again, completely honest. he was a merc, and vanessa just happened to be paying him to bring in weapons and supplies. he just, like i said before, omitted details.

- he told them they need to defend against the oncoming attack to the canyon because those were orders by doyle to apprehend the reds and blues, so technically it had nothing to do with felix, and he knew that locus was going to bring soldiers who would be attacking them.

               - this is where he used the situation to get information, which shows more about how he had manipulated chorus for so many years. he would twist a situation to get enough information that he needed to gain more control over his targets.

this is the majority of his statements/claims in season 11, so let’s move onto season 12!

- again, felix brings the brutal honesty on the operation he leads with tucker. “well it could be that someone from up top is coming to visit, or... it could be a response to all the weapons i stole from this place a couple weeks ago.”

              - thats how he brought in weapons and supplies! there was nothing that suggested, even in the videos just about charon, that felix didn’t steal weapons and supplies from the federal army. they did have the most resources after all, and knowing him he would’ve probably done anything to avoid calling control for a shipment.

- he was upfront and said he literally doesnt care if more soldiers die. which he doesnt. “but you do,” he goes on to remind tucker, another obvious way of manipulating him.

- vanessa also knows his entire background, as locus’s visions in the temple reaffirmed their time in the unsc. felix just left out the fact that he is still working with locus. and who knows? it easily could be a challenge to see who’s better once and for all. felix doesnt like locus and locus doesnt like felix (sorry lolix shippers).

- now when they tell the generals that the reds and blues have died, this is the first lie that felix tells in his time on the show - and it’s the only time where control directly told felix what to say, as far as we know. so clearly, it’s a much different way than how he regularly handles a situation like that.

this is the end of his claims while with the new republic before church and tucker streamed him to both armies. and after examining this i just like how much effort was put into felix and what a good character he is. he has a particular style of operation that is unique to him. i think it would be really interesting to see what happened to siris and how, if at all, it affected felix or turned him into the loveable asshole he was up until his demise. 

[squeiky]

This is going to get long. Sorry Op, but sometimes a post just happens to conincide whislt my writing/anlysis brain is on and well.. this happens:

I know this is sonadow posting but ignoring the shipping aspect- this actually encapulates a constant trait of Shadow the Hedgehog (and team dark as well) in which he often lacks the desire or need to constantly SAY or act (in the socially obvious sense atleast) as if he cares or is concerned about you (most people will consider his behavior "tsundere"-like in the fact that he openly has tendencies to deny any allegations of caring for someone, especially that of Sonic).

However,

whats intresting to is that not only does Sonic seem aware of this factoid (that others, aside from team dark memebers as they all dervive from similar ways of expression, dont seem to actievly be aware of), but openly engages with it in a fun, lighthearted and teasing way. Though Sonic is known for his mockery and clowning, when its particularly aimed at Shadow, it always feels like a confirmation rather than a sign of "just messin with him" (though of course it can always be the case).

Its not the best example but- lets say sonic is in need of help and Shadow is on a mission and on the way he decides has to save him. So, on the outside he appears more focused on external things, simply "doing this cause buissness is buissness" or he may be annoyed and scold Sonic for being too reckless and forcing him to have to save him on a mission.

Sonic, brushes it off and is joking about the situation- showing the more braver and stronger front of his persona. This however, may cause Shadow to get angry or annoyed as the light banter contrasts with the emergency.

So basically, the whole thinh could be chalked up to "Shadow get annoyed at Sonic for being dumb and Sonic teases Shadow cause he likes to mess with people" and nothing more.

But then if you examined it a bit more, it could be something more akin to "Shadow is very worried and concerned with Sonic being in danger and actively dislikes it when he is put in troubling situations, he has doesnt express this in a "oh my gosh are you okay🥺?!" So intead he resorts to simple correction of action via light "scolding" or simply telling him not to do it again. (In colors DS, when shadow was worried about his saftey, its simply a "good, your back." Or something similar. Again. Its always implied with him and never stated upfront.) Whilst Sonic, whom understands that hes worried, but requires some amount of vocalized validation to this fact, prys it out of him via the teasing, through the light banter of "why? you worried😏? ", "i didnt know you were such a good hugger" or something like that.

I think this attitude is what makes him feel safer around the people he is with, as if they are able to handle the mocking tone of Sonics more present persona, it would be safe to say that he can trust them enough to feel comfortable lets say.. be carried in someones arms in the middle of space while hes practically dying, because if they can handle the "annoying" part of him and still care about him deeply, then thats a keeper.

I think theres a trust and validation in that aspect.

(I think this especially also plays into characters like team dark, or even knuckles and Blaze. I think hes much softer on characters like Amy and Tails.)

Especially when you realise that Sonic was so pissed off at shadow he actively antagonized and called him a "faker" (yeah thats Sonic's thing. He started that.) And somehow, not only was Shadow about to play off of that in a fun way, he used it to make himself look "better" than Sonic and might actually be one of the first characters in game (that i know of) other than eggman to actually have seriously gotten on his nerves (to the point he was pacing around in jail all like pissed off), which is hilarious.

But overall, it just shows that Shadow can effectively take the worst of Sonic and send it back in a fun way (which grabs at Sonic's addrenline junkie fun-time addicted brain). If anything, once Shadow understands that Sonic literally is "what you see is what you get" he accepts that.

I think there thats where that respect comes from. In both parties as Shadow respects Sonics autheticty and expression, and in i think he may even find an appreciation for it.

Furthermore, you also can see how Sonic is capable of reading people quite well, and is able to understand other peoples thought proccess (which makes him good at making quick jabs that piss them off).

So when swapping the tables and haing Shadow in danger and Sonic the savior, the two probably would function the same way as i discussed prior- except sonic is much more capable of expressing the easy-to-pick up on "oh my gosh are you okay🥺?!" Type stuff. He might even literally say "ohmygosh r u okay 🥺?!" If hes THAT worried.. So Shadow never needs to "pry" anything out of him. In this light, Shadow is well aware thay Sonic cares about him (hes just annoying about it). Which makes it so that what Shadows gains from Sonic is less of that "validation & trust/comfort" and more of.. acceptance and understanding.

Because Shadow is often a character that in-universe is either mythologized, demonized or inhumanized ( inhedgehogized???) But when introduced to Sonic (who remind you is the FIRST character to seriously call Shadow a "heroic hedgehog" or something akin to that)

He becomes well. "shadow the hedgehog" not "Shadow the sciene project" or "Shadow the Ultimate lifeform" or "Shadow the dangerous entity" or what not. Theres a sense of "i take you as you are" type of way that Sonic gives to him. And with that he accepts whatever form Shadoe comes to him with. Never forcing anything on or away from him (to the point where Shadow straight up gives him his own "title" which again, is something SO intergral to who he is that the fact Shadow even did that just shows how much importance Sonic reprenst in his life. It took one person to show him that authenticty and acceptance thats hes

been craving ever since well.. probably maria). I think thats where that particular respect comes from and in some ways? Especially during the very last parts of SA2 where Shadow yells out to him the "i think your the ultimate lifeform!" To sonic and in turn when Shadow "dies", Sonic says hes "Shadow. Shadow the hedgehog" theres a tradeoff there.

The fact of the matter is, i think its more than just "oh look at this shadow says he isnt going to save him but then actually does" because 1. Two difrenet contexts (obviously) but 2. I dont think its even unrealistic for shadow to say he "wont save him" but then actually does.

He cares about Sonic too much to actually let shitty things happen, but wont actively coddle him like team sonic would. If anything, i personally think its more of I "i wont save you, so dont do something stupid, because then thats your fault and im not responsible for cleaning up after you." And less of a "i wont save you, I would let you get hurt/injured and die" type ordeal?

Idk, what do you, dear reader, have to say about this?

thinking....

[sanchoyo]

danny phantom 8-13 thoughts! again, under the cut bc I blew through 6 episodes in one go...

-LOVE THE WAY THE GHOST ZONE LOOKS. but theres fucking ghost cops??? ghost jail??? that SUCKS imagine dying and going to jail in your AFTERLIFE. danny going to JAIL WAS NOT something I expected. but seeing all the enemies together and work with danny to bust out. SO ICONIC I love that actually. and the thing about real world stuff acting as ghosts in the ghost zone is very cool.

-'there are some things more important that hunting ghosts!' mrs fenton says, about her husband forgetting their anaversary (FOR THE 18TH YEAR IN A ROW?? CHRIST) and not about, idk, their son clearly freaked out. she didnt even notice he was gone into the ghost zone!!! he might be a bad husband BUT shes not the best mom. they suck and I don't care about their relationship problems I care about these kids. danny doing his best to clean the house to keep his mom from getting mad at his dad?? hes such a good boy I want to cry, this is not his place, his dad should be cleaning his own shit up!!!

-maddie's butch lesbian sister is living my best life in her lil cabin. also being a snarky bitch to jack. queen. and her getting a 10th anniversary of her divorce. LOVE IT.

-mr. lancer being a cheerleader in his younger years makes perfect sense to me. king shit.

-dr. spectra's cat ears/mullet hairstyle?? sooo cute. I also just love the concept of a ghost just. sucking out people's positivity and feeding on emotions. a great villain. she put danny in a fucking diaper what the FUCK. and keeping it cold so no one would suspect shes a ghost??? INCREDIBLE. and her gay little blob sidekick. wlw mlm evil solidarity.

-JAZZ FOCUSED EP. YEAAAH!!! her first thought when she saw the ghosts was like 'omg i gotta tell danny :)' and her going to the teacher and also councilor trying to get help for him...shes just 16 but shes trying so hard to help him out :( watching this when youre younger I can imagine ppl are like omg annoying!! but watching this when im older im just like :( jazz baby im SO sorry </3 SHE BODIED THAT GHOST THOUGH. and the fact she didnt tell danny she knew surprised me. like, shes patient and waiting on him to tell her when hes ready!! thats so so sweet.

-christ the parents talking about 'PEELING IT LIKE AN ONION. AND EXAMINING REMAINS' of ghosts RIGHT INFRONT OF DANNY.

-'why am i so depressed and angry all the time!!' DANNY YOURE 14. i mean it IS a ghost this time, but...

-579$ top?? VALERIE NO ITS NOT EVEN CUTE IT DOESNT EVEN GO WITH THAT OUTFIT AAAA. tho this ep is called shades of gray..VALERIE FOCUSED EP FINALLY????! *THUNDEROUS APPLAUSE* I already knew about red huntress from my redesigns, but I didn't exactly know what that entails or how/why, so, it's fun to see the Origins.

-ghost pubby! ghost pubby!!!!! why is the dog a ghost?? the implication that the company had guard dogs and got rid of them...what did they DO. is it just the unfinished business?? of not having that toy it was looking for?? god I hope so.

I feel SOOO bad for valerie tho, my god. her friends are shunning her for what, because her dad lost her job and she had to move??? horrible. (and the fact the dog wrecked the moving van too...) I also love how 'from wisconsin' on the package was an IMMEDIATE RED FLAG FOR ME. WISCONSIN=EVIL NOW. vlads so petty.

-it took valerie like 5 mins to get the hang of hunting ghosts and shes already a much bigger threat than his parents tbh. who've been trying and studying this for years. and a more valid reason <3 love her shes so cute and cool. new daughter alert.

-'i should do SOMETHING to help valerie' no shit danny???

-'who is that, awesome outfit!' -top gay sam moments. i was going to say. before it immediately cuts to sam kissing danny LMFAOOO. don't think I like that, it puts tucker in a weird third wheel position... the next ep involves them holding hands and blushing when danny's cold...URGH No. not a fan ngl. the trope of 'if theres a girl in a trio she has to end up with one of the two guys!!'

-right as I say that they take it to extremes!! and ember shoots him with a love ray gun that makes him OBSESSIVE OVER SAM. AND SHE TAKES HIS HANDS AND SAYS 'YOU DONT FEEL THAT WAY ABOUT ME, I DONT FEEL THAT WAY ABOUT YOU' and her saying she doesnt want to be together like this. and tucker saying 'i always knew you two would get together!!' dont manifest it tucker please. the show pushing for it so hard makes me not want it KSHKJKJD I KNOW its probably canon. it sucks though. im a hater.

-vlad just LURKING AROUND THE SCHOOL GIVING VALERIE GIFTS ASJKDHKJ YOU WEIRD PETTY OLD MAN GO HOME!!!

-EMBERRRRR YOU WILL REMEMBERRRRRR . this is the one thing I kinda remember from when I was a kid EMBERRRRR ilu. top 10 cartoon bops. sams being a hater. popular things are popular for a reason. mr. lancer also being a hater. also everyone wearing her color scheme ..its a really good look, the purple, black, and minty color...

-penguins exist in the ghost zone. confirmed.

-EMBER JUST SHOWING UP AT A RANDOM HIGHSCHOOL TO PLAY?? UNANNOUNCED, MID DAY??? girl get a tour schedule. make some money or smth damn. I know shes probably doing it for the power boost but. lord. anyway if your show doesnt have a concert scene/ep, is it even valid.

-fellas is this gay. (she uses a GRAPPLING HOOK TO SHOOT OUT THE WINDOW AFTER SEEING AN EMBER VAN GO BY RIGHT AFTER THIS SHOT)

-hey, she had an undercut at some point!! my redesign!!! was accurate!! in..a way

-I feel like danny has a lot of pent up aggression ngl, him being heartbroken about sam and immediately going IM GONNA GO TAKE IT OUT ON EMBER. I mean she needs to be stopped I guess But. jazz has the right idea he needs therapy and a HEALTHY outlet.

-tucker singing > my singing

-girls cant be gamers -tucker and danny sexist moments. her being chaos in the game OWNED.

-TUCKERS HAT IS A BERET??? I THOUGHT IT WAS A BEANIE. SAM CALLED IT A BERET. WH.

-it was actually nice of lancer to let danny retake the test, and he go to play games again. smh. epic cringe gamer moments compilation. and driving him home!!! I actually like him as a character. anyway teachers like lancer are SO appreciated. I was failing middle school because of mental problems, and felt so dumb and got embarrassed by teachers who would just get onto me instead of bothering to ask what the real problem was, but when I was taking my ged classes I had a wonderful teacher who kept reassuring me that I was smart, and I got honors!! danny is SUCH a little shit to him (understandable, 14, but) but seeing them getting along better and danny putting in effort. SO CUTE. THATS MY SON, STUDYING HARD!!!! and being so PROUD OF HIMSELF!!! 91!!! BITCH!!! A- is STILL AN A!!!

-'why dont they ever realize thats me in a dress' mr lancer i am CRYING. i realized.

-technus being my ghost grandpa who cant game asking tucker for help. bless his heart. his out of date old ppl lingo circles back to being endearing <3 tucker not recognizing him despite the like, lack of any kind of serious disguise...I do love their lil in-game outfits....sam being the tank rules. I like technus' spider design also. more characters need to be giant freaky spiders, imo.

-finding your gf a new host because she cant maintain her ghost body outside the zone? amazing. using jazz as the host? ILL KILL YOU. jazz immediately accepting a ride home from a guy she just met and letting him know where she lives. letting him IN THE HOUSE??? nooo girl no lets use common sense </3

-sooo cringe the parents were like 'good job for spying on your sister' tho wtffff. doesnt matter if hes a bad guy, thats fucked. everytime these parents BREATHE im like. these are MY kids now <3

-BAD LUCK BEING A THEME OF THE 13TH EPISODE. thats super fun. johnny 13 being his name is so. iconic. your last name is a NUMBER? also goth tucker. I actually love the look. everyone looks good goth. 'the ladies love the eyeliner and onyx nail polish' sam you are sooo right every man needs to at least try those two things. im a lesbian and I agree. same, danny, your bff is gnc af

-LOVE kitty's design. and just, the concept of a ghost with a bike. couple goals, except yes stay away from jazz.

[misterbitches]

hi @yeedak thank you so m uch for replying with what you did. YAY ADHD!!!!! ur partner sounds like she rocks >:)  as do u

i found it really illuminating and i agree with all of it. and god as much as i understand reticence when black people are interracially dating (it is so hard) i also hate it when people dictate it and also to a degree that it makes it extremely uncomfortable for the person themselves. to me it really is about a sense of control particularly if you are a woman. constantly trying to pick someone’s life partner for them instead of letting them find out if it’s a) something they want or even want to do b) something they can handle and c) their experience. it can purely cultural as well. my mom is a black american but my father is nigerian and that was basically a sin. however my father’s siblings? the women who had to marry extremely quickly and had to be with nigerian men or at the very least african? divorced. because they had to clamor for love for approval, pop out babies, and look what that got them. i totally understand you and  your mother. and you’re right about all of it.

the idea of a man whore is so funny to me too because it’s not about sexual liberation it’s literally about them wanting to use people as disposable which is why sexual liberation for women as well can be confusing. but all of this isn’t so we can develop our own imaginations and find out our own inhibitions. like you said in all of it and i found this part very very interesting and true, “youth is for sex and no mention of asexuality.” when you get older you are not sexual, when you are a child you are unsure about it, but there’s a time in our lives where we shouldn’t waste it, where it’s only acceptable in that window, where it’s dictated. tangentially i think it’s very funny that the people we sleep with also become a point of pride. let’s say if he is a man (as a bisexual~**~ gorl) but he’s ugly, i should be ashamed, too?

so much boxing in and pushing and dictating. they really are here to spread a message. and i know things ar ehard. i can believe people ask you that but it’s still so.....weird? i remember saying something about my sexuality once and it’s not like i knew the people but then they started asking me questions and i honestly felt embarrassed and like an outsider. i dunno.

and your analogy of a mirror was perfect woaaaaaaah that’s what im gonna say now thank you so much credit to you. gENIUS!!! as real life changes, what we see changes. but media doesnt come first.

also totally agree about watching what people consume and not falling into those patterns. and when “bad” things are shown i do not understand why shows are so scared to show them as they are or not romanticize. a real issue to introduce when it comes to age gaps would be why it is frequent in the lgbtq+ community. that is a real thing because when you have to hide yourself of course you can be stuck in a state of arrested development and trying to re-establish times you may never have. that’s a geniuine fear and concern, it’s understandable even if i don’t particularly care for it, but it’s like for these writeres there’s no reason to look deeply or put that into their story. so why are they doing it? and what is the message here? uGH. and what ur mother said makes so much sense we are just constantly absorbing all these messages and culture absolutely aids to it and you’re right about the generations. and sometimes things stop and start but i genuinely think (and know) that for us to continue forward and not have the constant backwards taht means we have to push to get there and demand and that also means we have to make an effort to end the harm we then see on screen. rape culture dictates these shows. it relies on it. it is disgusting but rape culture is the norm, the norm is the oppression so we have to attack it otherwise it sticks and htat’s exactly why we see what we see.

and the unacceptability of gender fluidity is what keeps the genre SO INFLEXIBLE sincerely. it honestly just pulls so heavily from patriarchy and the roles in which we have to follow to uphold that structure. 

it’s really just not enough to show us things any more wihtout taking it into consideration. and like ive mentioned there’s soooooooooo much media that has a lot to say that embeds itself. there’s this thing my friend linked me to on re-examining queerness in korean cinema (much like my dad’s country; patriarchal, more “conservative, anti lgbtq+, reliant on capital. africa is different because of the blackness component but the structures aided by colonialism absolutely remain and continue and that’s how we see such similarities. thse countries are more “overt” in this output but still you know. america. sucks) because we are trying to re-evaluate what it means to be heard and seen. the different ways and sort of the message that a lot of us as lgbtq+ can feel. you know, how we can get a feeling on if a person has our same experience, how we kind of have to learn to identify that. not sure if this makes sense...

your mom sounds really cool. and i’m fucking sorry. so many men do that. i live with both my parents but even then i see this power imbalance i can’t stand and you know i would have believed it was normal if i wasnt able to learn aand had to build up thinking skills. there was one day that it hit me that there are parts of my parents relationship i abhor, that are imbalanced, that make me find my father disgusting and make me ashamed of my mother. i don’t want that to happen to me or my potential children. if i have a male partner for life, which i am sure i will because offffffff heteronormativity and homophobia and being half black american half nigerian, he cannot recreate that. i am optimistic on what people can do without needing such grand structures or the support of the elite etc you know? that’s how we know there’s good work that exists and people we can find that arent with the status quou!!! 

and who want a better world. we have to know we can rally that together. i think part of that is constant demanding of things to do better. there’s a rage against the machine song called settle for nothing and it’s about 0 compromise. there’s a famous quote i dont remember by who that’s basically like there’s an idea that there’s a limit to asking for dignity and what you deserve because when people realize they can live better lives they want to cultivate that more and more but that means a loss of control and a sharing of power from the top. nothing is ever enough if it can be better and we are allowed to demand it (or take it.) we deserve the world, we are being told that we’re asking fo rtoo much. are we? really? 

i was thinking about the children thing as well bc...lmao i was so tightly contorlled as a child and it really messed me up but at the same time, like you, i honestly do not want my children watching drivel. like even with youtube. a friend of mine said that what she thinks she will do is try and hammer home how fantastical these things are, they do not reflect reality, and to get them to understand the spectacle. at the same time i’m like does a child really need to watch these dumb tiktok stars or jake paul? but then im like i really dont want to control them. but like what if ur kid asks u to go to some like fucking BL concert or some shit like what do you say to that?!??! I DONT WANNA SAY NO BUT AT THE SAME TIME UHHHHlmao but at the same time we have to give them tools to analyze and do the right things and follow their hearts

however,

as you know

LOL

tysm for responding, lovely talking to you and hearing your thoughts!!!

oh btw so u r from kashmar? that is very cool......VERY COOL

[littlefoxwithbighat]

Hi! This is talking about the plot of the dream smp in a meta sense and its a bit negative. The person behind this blog wants to remind you that you can skip if it's not for you and they still love the SMP. :)

ALL DISCUSSION IS ABOUT CHARACTERS. DON'T ATTACK CCS OR I WILL STEAL YOUR KNEECAPS.

I can't lie; I'm really annoyed and worried at the way the writers are handling Tommys character at the moment, and am increasingly concerned about it messing up the plot.

I wasn't very happy with the finale. I don't think that means all is lost, I think they can pull it back but it's going to take some work. I was worried about the way that things were handled before but the green festival was actually very well handled, so my worries were mostly assuaged. But yesterday? I don't know.

The fact nobody lost a cannon death is kind of disappointing. The weight of blowing up an entire city/ (country?) brutally is somewhat lost if there is no human loss. Nobody was hurt physically and the only people this had a big mental impact on was Tommy and Tubbo, everyone else wasn't very attached to L'manburg or had gone rogue, or were detatched from the while situation. And maybe it's the fact it's happened to them before or that they still have each other or that it seems odd/ frustrating that they still care so much about this place or that it was always a losing battle and they knew it, but I dont find myself really pitying them like I probably should. And I think that comes down to character growth or lack thereof, which I'll discuss later.

Niki and Fundy have started a villain arc, or at least a violent nihilism arc, and I actually don't mind it, in fact I'm a fan but it wasnt really foreshadowed, or really just showing them cracking as much as it should have been. I would guess this has mostly been started for both of them to tie Niki into the plot and I can't blame her for wanting that. Fundys acting is very good, and I REALLY hope the writers handle this well. For Fundy, regarding the fact that his father is going to be resurrected and that Fundy is following in his footsteps... If the writers don't realise that connection and make this a big step in Fundys narrative I will scream. Also Funboo bros are very interesting character foils and I hope their relationship is maintained so that they can play of off each other and also man I just really want them to keep being friends, it's a generally positive healthy relationship that makes both characters sympathetic and we need that right now. As for Niki, her character motivations seem to be mostly centered around Tommy and on the one hand I'm like ehhhh, because Tommy's character already gets a disproportionate amount of attention in terms of narrative, and I get it, but recently he's been a bit TOO much of the protagonist for a multi-person POV improve server... and I'm apprehensive. However on the other hand this has potential for a nice confrontation between Tommy and Niki. If that happens I want Tommy to be aware that this is going to happen and not talk over Niki, and I don't want it to be brushed over. I think it would be best if it was just the two of them. This also gives a nice chance for Tommy to examine his trauma with Dream and explain his motivations and Niki to get her anger out. I also want it to end positively, because it absolutely can and lack of communication when the viewer knows how to fix it is OK as a plot device sometimes but incredibly frustrating if it keeps happening (cough, Tommy and Techno).

Ranboo is reacting to the plot amazingly and I have as usual only praise for him, go, you funky enderman boy, go.

Wilbur is getting resurrected which is a thousand percent because Will wants the plot back and honestly I don't really mind, I think he'll do a good job. However I really hope he speaks to everybody about their characters, particularly Fundy, Ranboo and Niki because I don't want their characterisation and arcs to be thrown away.

Tubbo is doing very well, and I don't have many complaints to be honest. I hope he continues to get in with the acting with no shame, because he's an amazing VA when he wants to be, but sometimes he undercuts serious moments a little too much by laughing. Same criticism for Phil actually. But both are doing good.

On the theme of that, while I don't mind tension relievers or humour in serious moments there are sometimes too many. It was a lot worse about a month back and it was improving, but it seems to be creeping back in and ehhh. It's kind of Marvel-esque and not in a good way? I think it has a lot to do with bloopers and for some reason there are loads at the moment? Like Wilburs arc had almost none and this arc there's at least 2 every moment. Which isn't always their fault but maybe they need to take more steps to prevent them.

Techno is doing OK, he's quite a meta character so I'm not too mad about him undercutting serious moments but sometimes he does do it too much or in the wrong place. Like making jokes about Connor completely over the top of Tommy and Tubbos reunion, you know an event which has been foreshadowed for yoinks, prevented them from getting a proper flow going and kind of ruined it. And that made the reunion really dissapointing, which is a shame because it could have been so cool. However his characterisation is consistent and dedicated, his goals and relationships are clear and he's getting humanised more which is nice, and his monologues are great. I'm curious to see what he does now NL'M is gone but I have total faith in him.

Now Tommy. Oh Tommy. His character is such a mess at the moment, which is a shame because there were moments I saw people doubting his character choices and I was behind him.

Firstly the relationship with Techno fell apart. That was inevitable. Tommy didn't care about anarchy and Techno didn't care about the discs and both of their goals would impede the others. But the way Tommy talks about Techno is so... No? And now I understand that Tommy is going to have a biased perspective on the whole situation, and that's fine and good, but his character is so wrong about Techno it feels weird and painful? Like even from his perspective it went down differently to how he talks about it. They don't listen to each other and it's like watching two people scream at a wall.

The issue is the relationship was fairly well developed. I struggle to see Tommy saying he saw Techno as a friend but Techno never saw him as a friend because hold on, what? Techno, here's a respiration helmet because of that one of thing you told me about your trauma, a disc because those make you happy, plus top tier armour and weaponry, plus I'm going to spend time with you, calm you down from panic attacks, hide you and protect you from Dream, let you wander around L'manburg and achieve your own goals and help you plan things out Techno and Tommy didn't get ANYTHING from that? Plus after Techno opens up about his goals and his trauma, do the one thing that would hurt him the most, (use and then betray him) and then directly oppose his goals after he helped me? Ugh. It just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I know he would never let Tubbo get hurt and thats fine, but there were ways around that. If you're framing this character as the protagonist, then he needs to be sympathetic or at least grow and Tommy using Techno again without remorse and then refusing to listen to his perspective or show any gratitude for anything makes it difficult for viewers to empathise with him in my opinion. Have him betray Techno and then listen to Techno when he explains why Tommys betrayal hurt him and apologise, fine. Have him listen to Techno and try and find a way to keep Tubbo safe regardless, fine. Have him betray Techno but apologetically and still trying to avoid Techo getting crushed or killed, fine. But THIS? Im sympathetic towards Tommys character but this throws away so much potential character development for Tommy, where at least he saw Techno as a person, and not only that but a nice person who despite everything has set aside everything to help him? And then for him to be exactly where he was at the end of season 1, both literally, and emotionally ? I understand this is a child soldier with trauma but this is supposed to be our protagonist and if he doesn't grow, and isn't sympathetic and destroys someone we care about, how can we root for him?

Now all of this could be forgivable, not great, but forgivable, if Tommy had moved on from the discs. The Goddamn Discs™. And the worse part is all the dominoes were lined up to suggest he had! We had his moment of "he watched me" where he realised Dream was the villain and controlling him, "I've become worse than everyone I hated" good, amazing, I see where this is going, "The discs were worth more than you ever were!" and then he retracts and apologises and you think horray! Tommy has realised the discs were being used to control him and if he doesn't care about them, they hold no value! Now he's going to realise that his friends are more important and he's going to stop going after the discs. His new character motivation can be killing Dream and protecting his friends, especially Tubbo. It's clearly angled this way, and this way the plot progresses and Tommy with it. What marvellous character development. Look at him go.

And THEN, after everything that's happened he says the most important thing is the disc and I want them back!?!? EH !!? Why... Who... Who gave the OK on that writing decision? That's so static and boring and unsympathetic! And then he's back to asking people do fight for L'manburg? What?

I'll be honest I was kind go hoping either Tommy or Tubbo would die with L'manburg. I didn't mind it they didn't, there are a thousand ways to make the plot work without them dying, but this was not a great one.

PLEASE let Tommy have some growth. Yes he's had some from not caring about L'manburg to fighting for it in season one, but that was ages ago and he doesnt seem to have changed since then in any way that really counts. And I know this is harsh and he's traumatised but you have to understand I am talking about this in a sense of characters and narrative and NOT in terms of real life. Tommy needs to be better and dynamic because he is a charcacter and I want him to be a good one.

Having said all that, here are my thoughts on the future of the SMP.

Firstly, I am worried that becuse it is such a good source of content, especially for Tommy that they will never ever kill his character and leave him fighting with Dream for eternity. And I love the Dream SMP but I've seen stories that get dragged out for plot or content, and however much you think you want it to never end, let me tell you, yes you do. It will get stale and repetitive and I want the dream smp, or at least Tommys arc to go out with a beautiful and brilliant and fabulous plot ending instead of being dragged into the dirt. And then maybe new characters take the spotlight. Just please god give it a goode ending.

I also really hope they don't throw other things away to make Tommy the centre of attention, especially if it's destructive to the plot, or kind of weird and obnoxious.

Secondly, I am intrigued about the prison and Schlatts book to Dream and Technos favour and the egg and what that entails and I hope they really think through those plot points carefully and make them work, and don't forget them or throw them away.

Thirdly, I am intrigued for Wilburs return and hope that he manages to fix it cohesively without too crazy a change of pace and style and keeping characters (especially Ranboo and Fundy and Niki) consistent.

I hope they prep for the future and think things thought and communicate with each other.

It might be interesting to see other countries finally discussed but I don't know how much that would intefere with other plot points so we'll see.

That's all! Reminder that this is about characters and plot and this is just a few criticisms. I love the dream smp, but there are somethings I wanted to get of my chest. Please be respectful and feel free to discuss in the notes. Also, again, no hate to any CCs!

[sickassastrology]

What made you different? 🥸

This is a general reading for the collective. This read is about your person you have in mind. Remember that because it is general it will not resonate with everyone. So take what sticks. Your free to choose whatever pile you feel. Heck, there could be little messages in all the piles. Time is fluid and we all have free will. So things can play out at anytime or maybe not at all. Follow your heart always. -E 💙🌻

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Pile 1 🍒🍒🍒

Greetings pile 1, the classy crew with the rider Waite deck. let's get into it. I'm getting whoever this was misused you when they had you. I heard the line from Jackson 5 I want you back. when I had you to myself i didn't want you around, those pretty faces always made you stand out in the crowd". With this group I'm feeling like what made you different to this person was that you had it going on. you had a lot going for yourself. and you didn't share that with just anyone. your riches. your glory. whether it was your body, money, time, energy. whatever the case was...you were selective in who you gave to. you are an attractive energy and human pile 1. and you know it too. 😜 confident. I'm getting the energy of I have a lot going for me, and I'm not going to just be out in these streets. my money is good, I look good, I feel good. It took a lot for you to get there and so you won't share that with anyone & everyone. and then....you gave it to this person and decided to act a fool, right? lol isn't it always like that. this person saw you as being able to take care of yourself, even when it was a lot. im getting heavily that some of yall have family members or siblings (big on the siblings) that you take care of. you are the parental figure to them. you had a lot of responsibilities, and yet you were still like a breathe of fresh air. you still knew how to smile. mature. you always smiled in the mist of sadness. and you meant it too, like it wasn't just a mask. it was like "I still have something to smile about in life. my flowers still grow. there's happiness all around me." you still knew how to give to this person. managing the connection even with your own stuff going on. and they admired that about you. when things got tough you remained calm. never too out of control. you handled each situation how it came and for what it was. although you told this person about your life, you NEVER made it burdensome to them. like that's my life, but we are separate from that. and this person was acting stupid. I see a few of yall into the occult too. and that definitely makes you different, doesnt it lol. but you don't mind it and didn't hide it because it's who you are. when you saw there was sneaky behavior going on, you left. you used your intuition to guide you. and now, this person does have a lot to give and will give it but if I screw them over they will bounce out. you are not the one to do an unfair relationship. I'm seeing this person got caught cheating on their phone. like you saw some hidden text messages. I also heard "nude" like nude photos you found. this person was doing too much. and you were like no it's not fair. and it was like they didn't care. they were only sorry they got caught. they see you are strong, know who you are, know your worth, and you won't bow down to anyone. and that's on purrrr! it hurts you, but you know your special and you are a gift to somebody out there. so if you have to leave, then bye. you'll see why I'm special later on. and this hurts but you know how to keep pushing forward. and your person is just like, omg how are they doing this, how are they still okay!? pile 1, your energy is so beautiful 😍. its very tranquil. and im not saying that you never get upset or anything like that but there is a peace about you. like it didn't work out. okay, cool. I'll just keep working on my life, taking care of me and mine. and best of luck to them, ya know? I see you did love them, like them a lot. but that's the way the cookie crumbles. and tbh, pile 1 I feel you'll be better off without this person anyway. like you'll be happier being a lone, find somebody else, or just keep taking care of business. so many blessings to you all, you deserve wonderful things. ❤

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PILE 2 🥠🥠🥠

Hi pile 2, so while I was shuffling I heard likeable. so your very easygoing and charming im getting. this pile is nurturing, motherly. I get the energy of "ill lick your wounds for you so you don't have to". Ouuuu a healer. I see. (make sure that people don't try to get over on you, because they will try it)! You are a kind person. I'm getting friendly to everyone around. This pile is let's make love, not war. You don't like to agrue much. This person could have been a fireball and you just put their fire ALLLL the way out lol. I feel like some of yall worked with this person or around them. and there would be competition around you, and they would try so hard to get your persons attention. like look at me!! trying real hard. and then there you were like " I'm just here, doing me". you weren't trying to stand out. and they looked right at your ass too. 😂😂 Pile 2, you are almost too loving for your own good, aren't cha. 🥰 you love life. you showed this person a different way of living, like just go with the flow. but you weren't reckless. if you did go out or drink. I'm feeling like a festival or winery type. you showed this person that life is fun. you are a true free spirit. you don't let a lot of life's qualms bother you. this group is very natural. humanitarian. I heard the word garden. this pile is the type that give to the less fortunate. I'm seeing a person on the street and like you'll give them money, food, or whatever it is with no second thought. very "here you are. be blessed". and this person was in awe of that type of generosity. because this world doesn't have people like that. you weren't doing it for attention. you are a G-I-V-E-R. Tbh, with this pile I'm really feeling like you have a gift to help people, but I'm not sure that you even know that yet. you think that's just how you are. but i see you really doing things with the community. know your purpose you all, because its so important. you are balanced. Yes you are such a giving person. BUT you will hold back IF needed. you know when to hold em & fold em. that's you. you just don't have to try hard. I'm getting your person wears a mask to fit in. you do nothing, you can get somebody's attention without doing much of anything really. you love life and you give life into others. into earth. the seas. skies. heavens. whatever it is, you give life to it. this pile is an empress. very divine feminine. *(remember tarot have NO gender, it is only energy)* you'd make a good parent if you had children. *as I said that, I heard I don't want kids but I have fur babies*. 😂 okay so you take care of your pets as your little babies. we love them too. 🐾🐾 this group wishes good on other people. as I was pulling your oracle. the card purpose slips right from my hands. and it reads. purpose: I know what I am here to do. didn't I say this group fits in to a bigger picture. find the reason you are on this earth, do not waste another minute because you will feed so much life into other people. earth angels. 🥰 beautiful. pride: I love myself and see myself in everyone. and gratitude: I am thankful for life and the opportunity it presents. come through pile 2! confirmation again. I just said you love the life you live. the pride you have is almost humble. it's like you like yourself. the good. bad. ugly. and there's no better way to be. and that's why they like you! heck, I like you 😂 so awesome. let your light shine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

PILE 3 🥦🥦🥦

Pile 3, whatsup!? How are yall feeling? So right off. This is more about your mindset pile 3. your intellect. this person valued your decision making. you moved very carefully when it came to other people. they would come to you and ask about somebody. and you could look and examine and tell if that person was okay or had some type of ill intent. umm....intuitive much? you are a very wise person. you listen a lot to your gut, even if you have to sleep on it. your going to go with what you feel. you knew how to get work done but you still made time for the connection too. I'm getting that some of you have an important job or school that takes up time BUT you knew when to be silly and take breaks too. I'm feeling like you and this person had really goody times together. snapchat filters and silly faces 🤪😂. you are a very determined person. when things get hard or you fail. you never stop trying until you succeed. but you pace yourself, never tire yourself out. sheer determination from yall. love it. there's a lot of power in that. this group loves gathering information. reading. tv. listening. however you gained it, you shared it with your person and other people. a teacher. you actually made this person become better when you spoke to them. it challenged them. you also had a quirkiness about you. I'm getting you had hidden talents about yourself that were really random 😂. but your person loved it. you all pulled the empathy card. it reads: I am open to seeing both sides of the situation. again yall, you really know how to read people. use this to your advantage and get in touch with yourself. Tbh, if you tap in...you can sense auras. if you can't already! 💫🔮

********************************************************

I have to say, every single one of you are special. each of these piles possess such unique abilities and talents. bless you all. not to say your perfect by any means. but beautiful works in progress. so whether or not these connections work out or your person comes back. you matter. you don't need to change what beauty inside yourself. keep growing. keep challenging yourself. don't compromise. your worth it. so climb to the highest mountain top and scream. "I AM WHO I AM. I AM WORTHY. AND BEAUTIFULLLLL". bless. -E 💙🌻

[wilted3sunflowers]

Okay just so everyone is on the same page on this whole ‘oh but x gems are identical, you dont have a problem with that?’ theres a time and place for that.

having identical gems as rubies and elites like in the ball, fine, normal, rubies are shown they dont think of themselves much as individuals, not the smartest, and typically go with the group. their purpose was made to be disposable in both their world and the literary sense. It was to show how Sapphire still saw the purpose and individuality when Ruby didn’t value herself. “Theres tons of me!” 

while with the elites its to fit a mold that the diamonds hold to a standard, however i wonder if they genuinely look that way all the time or just during a ball where ‘everyone puts on their best self’ as blue would say. Though those are all background gems, their purpose is just to fit the mold in a literary sense as well to show the vast difference between the cgs and homeworld standards held as well as ya know not to clutter the background, theyre just here to serve as background characters afterall.  The only other elites we have that are outside of the ball is also kind of questionable, the pyrope, demantoid, and hessonaite theyre all part of the commanding part of the elites, they have vastly different looks. However theyve really only appeared in the games [outside of a hessonite cameo] 

which makes sense, you do need to know who it is youre listening to if youre part of that hessonites troup or that pyropes troop which in turn for us the audience is memorable, even that scribble from centipeedle we could tell she was under hessonite during the war

Quartz in the show dont look identical, sure they have the same body [most of the time] but their hair style/color and skin ton/ etc are all completely varied and they are the type that wouldn’t care about that, theyre just soldiers so as long as theyre doing their job being a soldier i dont think anyone cares what a quartz looks like. In fact the look inside the rose quartz part of the zoo we see theyre even more varied than amethysts are, especially in terms of clothing and again only Shy Rose keeping the old homeworld uniform with only a little alteration to not show a diamond on her crop top. 

Theres no actual reason presented for Shy Rose to look exactly identical to our Rose Quartz. Not in the world, in the literary sense we know why shes to make steven and co. uncomfortable and remind them of rose which is already pretty heavy handed with the other two roses grouped in this bouquet that hold aspects of rose/pink but arent cookie cutter. As well as that there could have been another option than just a copy of The Rose Quartz. 

Looking at this objectively its just purely a coincidence these two characters look exactly alike to the last detail. no bang to the other side, no gem in a slightly higher or to the side place, theyre the exact same. 

Theres nothing further told, no pearl had seen her before and or interacted with her. Theres no pink made a scape goat or identical rose for xyz reasoning. Nothing. Pearl is shocked to even see this quartz, it obviously wasn’t something she ever thought could happen so the fact people keep trying to bring in a head canon isn’t going to cut it when examining this in the canon sense. 

Its unsettling they look the exact same because shes used for such a heavy topic for steven and co and she doesnt even get to have any individuality for herself in any physical measure. it doesnt feel like it works because she’s going to just be this mirror of rose for people to feel bad about.

its unfair to her, its not the best writing that could have been done either. A lot of us in the audience won’t ever consider her as her own person either. Especially since shes just a copy of one of the most important characters in this story. 

[themeed]

damn allowed myself to want things for a day and all i want is a van to live in, knowledge, freedom, weight loss, and a bass guitar.

im. happy with that i think. im proud of me, no jokes. im proud of being able to want things and care about them and vibrate towards them with longing. im... pleased with that. its fulfilling in a way Not Wanting For Anything isnt, because thats... kinda hollow. empty. in a vacant, lonely, yearning and grieving and SAD way. maybe because i Couldnt Want then. i Couldnt Desire or it would be used against me or taken away. that sucks. that sucked.

and now. im free to want again. and comparatively???? i think im very much never going to aim for buddhism or that weird Not Desiring Not Attached Nirvana mindset. like good for u but been there out of trauma and its not fun theres no reason to truly Live. u just float endlessly and experience and it aches so badly!!!! it hurts to want to want and not be able to. and i guess that is different from not wanting at all but... its not different enough for me to justify ever going back to that. or going forward to that. i just got this back and screw enlightenment if it means i have to give up on my passions i dont think life is worth living without it.

and anybody who looks down on that from a spiritual tower has yet to examine their own pride and how empty they feel without it.

anybody who looks down and smiles and wishes me luck on my journey? good for them. im glad theyre living their best life, on their journey as they see fit.

and i feel the need to protect myself because ive been hurt by the pride- the arrogance of others before. a lot of my hurts and traumas stem from my mother being too prideful to recognize that she can be wrong and someone under her power could be correct over her. and it was an uncomfortable truth. so she denied it was one at all and hurt me. i know the reason could be elaborated on. she didnt want to confront her own internal logic. or trauma. or even doublethink. that doesnt excuse her hurting a child for the sake of her sense of pride, of comfort, of self-worth. a child under her power, that she claimed to be parent of. teacher of.

not owing anyone anything is not the same as not hurting anyone. i havent reconciled that yet. oppressors should be held accountable for their mistakes, and give reparations if the harm is physical at LEAST. and i think that applies to politics, yes. privately though? if i beat up a nazi, i dont want to pay for his hospital bills. my personal philosophy struggles between equating people and ideas as a worth measurement, and realizing that that line of thinking is... similar to oppressors. but. its based on something people can change. the question is, do i think "if given the opportunity" is a good enough reason to stop and question a racist that runs their mouth? and do i think pre-emptive violence is okay? if say, a nazi walks into a bar and doesnt say anything but is wearing all the red flags and bells and whistles. i dont think that justifies a beatdown. being asked to leave, sure, but the beatdown doesnt start til the first remark flies.

once the intent is given OR the action is taken, the line is drawn. doesnt matter if they Havent Had The Chance. if theyre starting shit outside of debate spaces like that, and not, say, asking questions, theyre not looking for new perspectives, and it is NOT my job to educate people. its not my job to Show People The Light. a quick fucking google search could tell them why theyre wrong. if they havent put even the most basic energy into questioning their beliefs, thats on them.

it sounds like im trying to absolve myself of blame here. largely because. i think i should go out and help educate people because theyre inherently complacent if theyre, yknow, in a position of power. aka white folk and men and rich folk and cis folk and on and on and on. these people dont live my reality. they dont live the reality of a gay black man in the south, or a genderqueer lesbian in the west, or an indigenous woman whose nation is being targeted, or a muslim woman who cannot wear her headcoverings in the face of danger of death, or an asian immigrant who cant get a job because of COVD age discrimination resurging. we will never live each others realities, but we can become aware of them.

they wont come into awareness without someone asking or telling, and then doing something to change them.

we shouldnt need to go running to people in power for them to be aware of problems in the populace, govt is supposed to help and solve issues like this. like. actively. thats the whole point, make life better for the countrys citizens. and individuals in a position of social power...

are individuals who didnt take on a responsibility to protect and serve or otherwise care for the populace of a nation. i personally think they SHOULD care, but they are not obligated to. i cant make them care about others.

and honestly, on some of them, it would be a waste of time. there are people who want to change or question things and yknow what? they seek out answers. in people or places or online usually. stats and stories.

so like. i dont think someones Potential as a person matters when theres a throwdown about to happen. it really isnt my responsibility to save people from themselves or try to change their sides against their will. if they want to chat about it they can ask questions first.

not throw insults or punches or hatred.

what people have been taught is worth analyzing and trying to correct IN SOCIETY but i cant fix every broken white boy that comes to me. PSAs, fliers, outreach, online videos, debate spaces. those are things i already have access to and can be a part of if i really want to go around changing minds. or yknow. get involved in legislation and be myself around others to change their perceptions of whats socially acceptable or normal. maybe protest, maybe call congressfolk, etc.

but not every comment has to be analyzed or a learning opportunity. im allowed to shut it down, and people can respect that or stop talking to me. this isnt my parents house where i had to justify everything that i said or did when scrutinized, and doubly justify any criticism i had of mother, or any joke i frowned at instead of smiling.

these people dont have that power over me. they arent my mother. they arent my boss, and if they are i can fuck off and get a new job if necessary. they dont have financial control over my living space and food and schooling and physical control of where i can go and with who and for how long. I CONTROL THAT. I do.

Huh. maybe thats why i want a van so bad. i mean... when this lease ends if nobody is gonna end up living with me...

i could just... live in my car and shower at truck stops. get a storage unit for my stuff. save by driving jobs. like 40 to 60 a day. tear out my cars back, insulate it, and install my mattress pad there. water on the floor, cooler next to it, wooden cutting coard, knife, single camping plateware set, and another little shelf for spices. maybe a hot plate i can hook up to the car battery? get a long enough usb and it might be doable. i could go camping and open the trunk to just... vibe.

because yeah, honestly? i dont plan on having a solid apartment for a bit. like a long bit. and i still have like 70000 miles on my car before itll want to go. and by that point, even at like 100 miles a day, thats like 2 years, less if i go cross country in that vehicle. i could save up SO MUCH for a better vehicle, or like. college. live on campus, get some credit, continue working after i figure out want i want to do.

i think thats a solid plan, even if i dont get another apartment and put everything in storage. work as i need to instead of all the time for rent, really only paying for gas, car repairs, car ins, food, and phone data/hotspot internet... that would bring my monthly expenses down to like 500 a month max instead of like 1400. id only need to make some 1000 a month doing contract stuff to save for taxes and stuff. anything extra would be just that: extra for savings and things. holy shit.

depending on how this next month goes for my friends, holy s h i t.

i. i might do this. legitimately.

i. dont think i can yet. i need proof of address to get my license im pretty sure? but hey, thatll be my 21st this year, so. once i have that i wont need a new address for a While. i dont know if ill want one, really.

i could always just ask a friend or family member if i could use theirs for mail that cant go to a PO box.

anyway. yeah. wow.

[dreamcloudlanding]

Dad AU: The Trip

Genji: “I have to say Jesse, your house is spotless.”

McCree: “Well, Gabe’s been on a cleaning spree sense yesterday. I’m guessin’ we’re gonna have company.”

Gabe: *comes in the room* “Jesse, I said not to bring anyone home. Your Aunt Moira is going to be here any minute!”

McCree: “But we got a project due, boss! Don’t have time to do it later.”

Gabe: *sighs* “This is why I tell you not to wait until the last minute to do your work!”

Genji: “My apologies, Mr. Reyes. I won’t be intrusive.”

Gabe: “Fine. Moira’s probably not going to care anyway.”

*Doorbell Rings*

Gabe: *shutters* “There she is.” *mutters as he makes his way to the door and opens it*

Moira: “Why hello, Gabriel. How are you feeling?”

Gabe: “Same as ever, Moira. Come on in. Jesse’s in the kitchen with a classmate.”

Genji: *shutters* “Jesse, I suddenly feel uneasy.”

Jesse: “Heh, just wait until she makes eye contact.”

Moira: *enters the kitchen* “Jesse! How wonderful to see you.”

Jesse: *glances up from his book* “Moira.”

Moira: *looks to Genji* “And who’s your little friend here?”

Genji: “O-oh uh, Genji Shimada, ma’am.”

Moira: “Ah, so you’re Japanese.” *clears throat* “お会いしてうれしい、源氏”

Genji: *startled* “あこんにちは...” *leans over to Jesse* “This is your aunt?”

Jesse: “She’s actually a family friend. We just call her ‘aunt’”

Gabe: *enters kitchen* “Moira, are you harassing the boys?”

Moira: “I’m merely making conversation, Gabriel.” *suddenly grabs Genji’s chin and stares at his eyes* “Mhh... fascinating..”

Genji: *too confused to say anything, looks to Jesse for help*

Jesse: *doesnt look up from his book* “Just let it happen, Shimada. It’ll be over faster that way.”

Genji: “A-ah.. are you some sort of doctor, ma’am?”

Moira: *pulls out a handheld microscope and continues her examination* “Something like that.” *suddenly releases Genji and pockets the microscope* “You know, you might be just the subject I’ve been looking for. I have some samples in my bag I would like you to try.” *heads to the door before pausing and turning back to Genji* “You don’t have any law enforcement in you family, do you?”

Genji: *feels goosebumps appearing on his body* “U-uh.. no?”

Moira: *smiles darkly* “Wonderful.” *leaves the room*

Genji: “.... You know, I think I have a test to study for!” *scrambles to gather his things and heads for the door* “We’ll finish this later, Jesse. See you la-“

Gabe: *blocks his exit* “Kid, I’m going to be frank with you. If it’s not you, it’ll be me she tests on, and I’m still recovering from last time.”

Genji: “W-wha?”

Gabe: “Sorry kid, sacrifices have to be made sometimes.”

Jesse: “The sacrifice is you, Shimada.”

Genji: “Jesse?”

Jesse: “Sorry, partner. I have to agree with the boss man. I ain’t taken any more pills.”

Genji: “This is- you would betray me like this?”

Gabe and Jesse: *shrug*

Moira: *returns with a vial of liquid* “Now Genji, you may feel a bit strange after ingesting the solution. Just behave in whatever way feels natural.”

Genji: “Uh... what if I say ‘no’?”

Moira: *pauses and lets her face slacken before smirking and letting out an amused laugh*

Genji: *intense discomfort*

Moira: *unscrews the top of the vial and pulls out the eyedropper inside* “Bottoms up, dear.”

*A few hours later*

Jesse: *opens the front door, smiling at Hanzo on the porch* “Howdy, Shimada. Haven’t seen your pretty face nearly enough.”

Hanzo: *rolls his eyes* “Cut the crap, cowboy. Where’s my brother?”

Jesse: *face falls slightly* “I’ll show you, but you’re not going to like it.” *beckons for Hanzo to follow him into the kitchen*

Genji: *in a fetal position on top of the fridge, slowly rocking himself back and forth and staring into space with fully dilated pupils*

Moira: *taking notes* “Interesting...”

Gabe: *sitting at the table with his head in his hands* “Moira. This is a new low.”

Moira: “I don’t know what you mean.”

Gabe: “You sent a child on a drug trip!”

Genji: *twitches and shrieks before returning to silently staring*

Moira: *takes more notes* “All in the name of science, Gabriel.”

Hanzo: *enters the kitchen beside Jesse* “Oh, what the hell?” *approaches the fridge* “Genji! Get down! You’re an embarrassment!”

Genji: *slowly turns to Hanzo* “...Brother... I can see sounds...” *lets his head drift back up to stare into space*

Hanzo: *turns back to the others* “What the hell is wrong with him?”

Gabe: *sighs and stands up, pulling out his wallet and taking out 50 bucks* “Your brother is on a drug trip. Don’t tell your father.” *hands Hanzo the money*

Hanzo: “... Do you mean my actual father or Morrison?”

Gabe: “Yes.”

Moira: “Ah, so he has a brother? I’d be interesting to see how similar genetics would play a role in the effect of-“

Gabe: “No, Moira. One child tripping on top of the fridge is already too many.”

Hanzo: *turns back to Genji* “So you disgrace our family even further by succumbing to drugs, Genji? Why am I not surprised?”

Genji: “I see it all, Hanzo... The dragons are real.. You know nothing... NOTHING!!” *throws a cereal box at Hanzo*

Hanzo: “Alright that’s it! Get down right now!” *reaches up and grabs Genji’s shirt*

Genji: “No, brother! It’s not safe!”

Hanzo: “Stop being an idiot!”

Genji: “THE DRAGONS, HANZO! THE DRAGONS!” *falls on top of Hanzo, making them both fall to the floor*

Jesse: “Man down!”

Hanzo: *groans with annoyance* “Jesse! Help me with the moron!” *trying to push Genji off him*

Jesse: “Alright Alright.” *grabs Genji by the underarms and hoists him up* “There you go, partner.”

Genji: “The world is spinning so fast!! Oooooohhhhh!”

Hanzo: *stands and glares at Genji* “Get a hold of yourself!”

Genji: “STOP YELLING AT ME, YOU BITCH!”

Hanzo: *slaps him across the face and grabs him by the collar* “Listen to me! You are going to shut up and straighten up so that I can take you home! From that point on I don’t care what you do, but for now, you don’t say a word! Got it?!”

Genji: *frowns pitifully while holding his cheek and nods*

Hanzo: “Good, now come on, idiot.” *drags Genji to the door*

Gabe: *smiling lightly* “I like that one.”

Jesse: *smirking* “Me too.”

Gabe: *rolls his eyes*

Moira: *follows Hanzo and Genji* “Shimada dear, keep note of your brother’s activities and send me an email with the results!”

Gabe: “For god sake, Moira, leave them alone!”

[roseamongroses]

Antithesis: “what do you have? “ I have a kNIFE” “NO”

[Specific-Summary]: They should expect growing pains. For not everything to feel right or make sense. That doesn't mean it'll always hurt, nor does it mean they can't have fun along the way. It's senior year. Everything may be different. It won't be senior year for long. Everything will be okay.

[General Warnings]: Implied Emotional Abuse, Implied Physical Abuse, Bad Parents are Bad Parents, Mild Sexual Content/jokes,Mentioned Homophobia, Mentions of underage drinking (backround), Some Catcalling,Cursing , Self Hate,implied pregnancy talk/inability to become pregnant, adults arguing where the “kid” can hear it, adults drinking,

[Tags/mood:] highschool au,  fluff and angst but its all good, chat fic, teen stress, its flordia no snow we die like men [Pairing:] Roceit (Roman Sanders/ Deceit Sanders), hinted future/possible logince/roloceit/loceit [Characters]Roman Sanders/Deceit (Dmitri) Sanders, Virgil Sanders, Logan Sanders, Patton Sanders, Remy (Sleep) Sanders, Nate Sanders, Dragon Witch (Diana) Remus “The Duke” Sanders (minor/brief)

(Ao3) (Previously)

(8) (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (14) (15)

(16) (17) (18) 

L: I May Have Lost Roman

V: nice

P: not nice :)

V: i feel vaguely threatened

Rem:@L how the fuck did you manage that Rem: nvm i know how just give me details

L:I don’t know ? One second we were at check out L: Next minute he was Gone and Nieve is looking suspicious

L:Hold on lemme ask Dmitri

V: why is he there

L: I mean he’s actually pretty chill L: But he dropped Roman off and Nieve got attached L:I’m...not sure if she’s planning on letting him go?

V:logan, my friend, my buddy, V:the only person in this chat with basic reading comprehension

Rem: that’s pretty fair

P: it really is tbh

V: Send. Pictures.

L: Okay L: Slight Issue

V: you lost the snake too

L: I lost Dmitri too and Nieve is not spilling

Rem: oh they’re defeinately fucking

L:...Where? The bathroom?

Rem: Don’t knock it till you try it ;)

V: not to be that guy but im vetoing this discussion V: cause thats a Yikes even for you Remy

L: Alright time to find them

Rem: check ;))) the;))) bathrooms ;;))))

L: Remy.

Rem: alrighlright too far ill stop

L: Thank you.

V: keep me updated V: i only have silence and physics homework as company

L:Huh L:Found them

L: Roman….found a katanna…

V: im sorry WHAT V: Why The Fuck Does He Have A Sword

Rem: drop the location of that store man

L: 1) It’s a Katanna L: 2)I will certainly Not. L: 3) He’s trying to convince Dmitri why he should have it

L…..and Dmitri looks more amused then concerned

V: if I can't have a tarantula he sure as hell cant have a sword

L:I told him it was probably fake/ poorly made and that he should take the time to invest the proper skill in money in a real one

V: goddamit logan you cant logic roman.

L: It worked. He put it back. L: So I say I can do what I want with roman

Rem: some spicy takes from the chats only brain cell ;)

---

“So you’re turning eighteen, in a few months. ” His aunt said, dabbing her cheeks with a napkin. She still managed to hold an air of prestige despite getting utterly shitfaced the night before. Her appointments have been going well.

Dmitri looked up, masking his surprise and holding his tongue.

Dr. Montag looked over, quieting the running water and placing the dish was he was cleaning down, “Really?” he said, brushing his hands, “You got any plans?” he asked, Dmitri.

“Oh we usually do something small,” His aunt interjected, “But seeing as he’s my father’s favorite grandchild,” Only grandchild, “He’s is flying from Paris to join us. And he was never a man of modesty so I’ve been thinking about doing something special for the occasion.”

Oh.

Dmitri fought the smile creeping on his face, ducking his head. He shouldn’t be surprised that she remembered after all if his grandfather was visiting. It’s how he got his phone, laptop, his car.

It’s probably why she puts up with him, to begin with. Cause it wasn’t guilt.

“--We should get your hair cut,” She continued, and Dmitri snapped out of his thoughts, “Maybe invite Diana--he’d like her,” she murmured.

“Diana and I a-” He closed his mouth, and his aunt’s eyes shot over.

“You broke up?” She narrowed her eyes, examining her nails, “Huh, makes sense seeing as...” she gestured at him vaguely, “So who have you been sneaking around with?”

“I’m not sneaking around with anyone,” Dmitri said, meeting her gaze. And technically he was right, it’s not sneaking if she just hasn’t been asking. And he’s given up on telling.

Dr. Montag’s eyebrows knitted together confused,” Well that isn’t true,”

Dmitri’s eyes went wide, stomach sinking.

His Aunt’s grin spread, “Oh really?”

Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck--

“He’s been helping me out, hon,” Dr. Montag set down a glass of water and pills beside her plate, “You’ve been so stressed lately,” he looked guilty and produced some tickets, “I thought I’d surprise you.”

Her face softened and like that the tension left the room. Those two got to linger in whatever lovey-dovey spell had taken hold of them in the last few months, but Dmitri was still on edge.

She still kept him on edge, but he could get her back. Even the playing field. Anytime he could leave this—Anytime he could flip this switch and put her on edge and make her—

He stopped eating, setting his plate aside.

He felt sick.

---

R:helllloooo R:anyone up R: sigh R: allll by mySELLLLF

L: Roman?

R: the one and lonely yes hello human contact???

L: Are you alright? It’s 3 am why are you still awake?

R: why are YOU up mm????

L: My parents have newborn twins. What’s your excuse?

R: well fuck got me there

R: i was texting dee but he was rlly tired and i stILL can’t sleep

L: Any particular reason?

R: u m

L: Private chat?

R: please

- [TheTruthAboutTheMoon]

TheWalkingMouth: Okay shoot

Cowboy:it's stupid

TheWalkingMouth: I’ll tell you if it's stupid or not just say it

Cowboy: i just….like Cowboy: it's all kinda….hitting me a ll at once and i Really don’t like thinking about it but i cant bottle shit up either like you bastards so i feel like the human equivelent og a washing machine with too much laundry in it

TheWalkingMouth: Then don’t? TheWalkingMouth: Even if it's too ‘stupid’ for me I’m sure Dmitri wouldn’t mind

Cowboy: yeah but i feel like im going to say something shitty to him i Cowboy: like we should talk about it Cowboy: and i will Cowboy: but not now--later when it's not too stressful for either of us

TheWalkingMouth: Why would you say something shitty?

Cowboy: idk id jst get frustrated trying to explain it Cowboy: like hes smart as hell and probbaly get it without me saying anything but like Cowboy: I have neither the patience nor articulation right now to explain like a civil person and he doesnt need me being shitty about it

Cowboy:like,,,,,for example,,,,, if he fucks up in school, he’ll get recommended a tutor and teachers would assume hes doing his best and hes such a sweet and quiet boy

Cowboy: like he is sweet!!but hes a little shit too!! And gets away with it!!! Half those pranks he pulled on virgil, as Iconic as they were he never got in trouble for them!!!

Cowboy: when i fuck up i

Cowboy: god it's stupid

TheWalkingMouth: Might not get a second chance? Yeah I get it.

TheWalkingMouth:Remember when I first transferred here? None of the teachers would take me seriously bc of my accent and if they did, they were afraid of me. I could repeat something another kid said word for word and still be told I had an attitude.

Cowboy: god i remembered that Cowboy: you answered his yes or no questions in a fuckin montone, quiet ass voice and he legit called in the office cause he got scared of a goddamn freshman

Cowboy: But ye when i fuck up Cowboy: im suddenly the lazy ass brown kid who should spend less time corrupting youth with my feminine hips and curls Cowboy: like it's not like a lot of them say it outright but it feels like if im not perfect im fufilling all the stereotypes

TheWalkingMouth: Ah okay, rant away

Cowboy: OK like like like im not like virgil right?? in a lot of ways and it fuckin shows

Cowboy: he’s been planning on going into engineering since sixth grade meanwhile i only got my shit together in highschool

Cowboy: and like now that im here/???what now??? My mother expects me to have my shit together meanwhile im over here freaking the fuck out over whether not it's worth it to even try Cowboy: like yes mother i want to go to an art/or librel arts school that may or may not accept me that we may or may not afford to find a career in who the hell knows because if i have to sit in a healthcare class or a applied mathmatics class like you did i miight actually shank the professor????

Cowboy: that i dread the thought of not trying to explore my options outside of this fucking state but i dread the thought of going bc i cant stand the thought of being away from home but i cant fucking find a reason to stay cause everyone i love is leaving or planning their own life anyway???

Cowboy: like remys gunna fuck off to who knows where regardless of whether or not he has a plans or money, pattons gunna take care of his grandmother whereever the fuck a canada ,moms moving in with tia, virgils already mentally flipping me off ready to fuck nasa , and i only fucking hope dmitri even getss the chance to choose where he goes but hes g o n e and i die from yearning behind a screen like the gay victorian i am , and you….i actually dont know

TheWalkingMouth: Teaching for either biology or physics

Cowboy: huh it fits but what about chemistry??

TheWalkingMouth: Fuck chemistry.

Cowboy: oh thank god we’re on the same page

TheWalkingMouth: Anyway, I assume you’re more worried about whether you should apply rather then if you could get in?

Cowboy: i think so

TheWalkingMouth: Well if my opinion means anything to you

Cowboy: more than you’re assuming but yeah continue

TheWalkinMouth: Wait

Cowboy: nothing nothing continue

TheWalkingMouth: Okay-- I think you should go for it but you don’t need to dive head first into it and commit to everything 100% like virgil did.

TheWalkingMouth: You’re allowed to keep your options open, to have backup plans for back up plans

TheWalkingMouth: It doesn’t mean you’re not passionate about your art. Doesn’t mean you’re inevitably going to get a office job and abandon all your dreams. It means you’re being smart and not backing yourself into a corner

TheWalkingMouth:It’s okay to be scared. It’s okay not to have it all figured out

TheWalkingMouth: Nobody does.

TheWalkingMouth: Even if no one else gives you a second chance at least give yourself a second chance.

TheWalkingMouth: It’s perfectly normal to be afraid to fuck up and get fucked over TheWalkingMouth: That doesn’t mean you will everytime TheWalkingMouth: And it certainly doesn’t mean it's the end

Cowboy:

Cowboy:

Cowboy:

[...Cowboy is typing…]

---

@daflangstlairde

@ace-anx

@cataclysm-al

[dcptcnx]

Hawks Theory

Okay before I get started, I wanna thank @hobitteh for their fanart of Hawks as a child (for his bday and Xmas) !!

Alright. Now I’ve been listening to this NF playlist on Spotify and it’s got me in my feels (it’s deep af). I know I said that NF songs got me thinking about the Todoroki family (and I will personally make a theory about that later on) but I wanna go on about Hawks today.

We know from manga that Hawks was shown as a kid VERY VAGUELY about his rescuing and stuff. But it got me thinking...Is hawks hiding valuable information about his family and what not?

⚠️I’m really sorry for about what I’m gonna say and for this certain reason, I’m gonna put this theory under the bar because it involves the mentions of physical, and emotional abuse, as well as drug use, and very personal and triggering topics. ⚠️

when I listen to any NF song, i obviously listen to the lyrics, as he raps about his personal life and how he has coped. But some of his songs, I hear stuff more vividly.  but Because Hawks’s past was so vaguely mentioned, i have very little to go off of. 

At some point in the manga, we see that the price of endeavor toys has dropped drastically because they were not selling as fast as All Might toys. and we see that Hawks has possession of one at this time frame. But in the entirety of the flashback, we see no evidence of his parents. I came up with 4 outcomes or whatever.

1) his parents were separated

2) he was taken from his household and put into foster care

3) he ran away from home

4) one or both parents were abusive to him and he found peace outside

for reason 1, I think that because maybe one or the other parent was being accused of cheating, doing drugs, being abusive or something and for them to find a point of “peace” they ended up splitting up and not living together??

this leads into my 2nd, 3rd, and 4th reason. if the case was that one or both parents were abusive or split up or something, he could’ve ran away from home at a young age because he couldn’t handle the rage and anger within the household. Or a close family friend didn’t want Hawks to grow up in such a toxic environment and called CPS (Child Protection Services) which had him be taken from his parents due to “lack of resources to care for a child”

if that^^ reason were so, the way he got the endeavor toy was A) he was given it from the nanny, B) he stole it while out and about, C) he found it in the trash, or D) his mom or dad bought it with little money they may had have and gave it as a gift.

When i looked at Hobitteh’s art, i saw that young hawks has smudges all over him, with an empty room with no lights on. and 2 parents arguing about the “Endeavor gift” he was holding. The father silhouette is shown yelling at his wife about ‘why did you buy that? you know we cant afford such things’ and the wife is responding back with ‘its his birthday and christmas gift!’ when examining this, I kinda get the sense that Hawks was poor, or was barely making ends meet. But i took this situation into another angle.

Father is abusive to his wife about hawks. Hawks had a fear about his dad and would do anything to make sure his father didnt release his anger on him. Mother could have loved hawks physically, but mentally and emotionally, she wasn’t there for him: she could have been addicted to some sort of drug, and spent the little money they had on getting her fix. This situation could’ve drove hawks’s father into a ‘frenzy’ which led him to leave. 

in the mangacap of dabi walking away from hawks to an open door is very interesting. This may have absolutely nothing to do with this but, Dabi is seen walking towards an open door with light; open door to new beginnings, while Hawks is left in total darkness; he let his fear consume him deeply and it dictates his life. (the fear of his past creeping back up to him)

I dont know if Hawks knows about how Endeavor has treated his own kids, because he looks up to him. but i feel like if hawks knew, he would distant himself cause he would remind him of his own father. 

Hawks mother, as i said could have been a drug user, may have overdosed on some drug and passed away before Hawks graduated or even at a very young age. This kinda adds to my internal thought that the reason hawks never attended U.A was that it was too much for him to handle, that he didnt really want to be hero for himself but for the people who asked him to. Hes afraid that his downfall will soon show and everyone would immediately dislike him cause he has ‘villainous tendencies’ by his actions.

Being in a poor environment has easier access to drugs, and because his family made just enough to buy the bare minimal on food, his mother just didnt care, cause she needed her ‘fix’ so she would spend the money on drugs, and cause her husband, Hawks’s father, to lash out. 

maybe hawks has a super soft spot that nobody knows about and hes too scared to open up too much cause he doesnt want history to repeat itself. he doesnt want to hurt someone who never deserves it. with the abusive part of the theory, it points me to a direction with an Overhaul theory (which i will also write about some time)

all of this could be a complete utter lie and that his parents loved him dearly and did everything they had, but this is what *I* got with someone’s fanart and how Horikoshi added into the manga with the absence of his family.

[scarletrebel]

⭐star⭐ waffle at me about your favourite lines youve written

ohhh friend you have opened a pandoras box and i hope you are ready also thank you aha

so i started…….. picking some lines and made the Executive Decision to just do one fic because i was planning on doing a couple from a handful of fics but turns out im far too prone to waffling about this kind of stuff because i love picking things apart and figuring out why they work because i love fuckign words and the things they evoke and stuff so yeah this is just some fave lines from most recent fic, requital. 

this was part of a ‘directors cut’ writer thing and if anyone has any more prompts, feel more than free to send them my way! 

Requital, Chp. 1: 

His honesty, wrapped tightly underneath a chivalrous act; a throwaway comment to soften the exposure of such a question, draws her closer.

She kisses him, and hopes that even though the motion is countless in the amount of times they’ve come together, that the answer is plain enough. A claim, she hears her own words in her head, tasting the tobacco of his morning cigarette on her tongue, the warmth of the pull at his hands on her hips.

so whilst i cant say this section was directly inspired by the ecdysis book, what i can say is that there is definitely some influence going on here, in particular these two lines from the page ‘synesthesia’:

“Wu Ming is a bonfire in the darkness, and she crawls toward his warmth.”

“Wu Ming leaves his questions by the wayside as he is drawn inexorably into the gravity well of her desperate honesty.” 

and thats not something i realised until i was writing the final draft, and im pretty pleased with myself considering not only is requital going to examine some of the similarities between avia and drifter, but also the fact that ecdysis is probably my favourite book. i mean…… ‘drawn inexorably into the gravity well of her desperate honesty’ what the FUCK KIND OF LINE its gorgeous i cant deal with it or this book or this page or how desperately gorgeous the tragedy of drifter and orins relationship is 

also…… look. im a hopeless romantic. always have been, probs always will be, so when i say avia and rook are soulmates i mean it in the cheesiest way possible. right before this is rook feeling a bit self-conscious about the whole awoken engaging thing, and theres no way avia can actually put into words how irrevocably in love she is with rook. so she kisses him, and hopes beyond hope that she can put those feelings into motions if not words. i also enjoy the small bit of possessiveness that came out of her too, because the whole ‘claim’ thing with the awoken was there since the first draft but this section came in the final edit, she thinks of it so casually but when she goes on to say that she’d actually duel anyone who came between them i…….. would not put it past her to be 100% down to do that. 

rook isnt a bonfire in the darkness, he’s an anchor in the deep, a solid tether when the sea becomes a storm. 

(ayyy where the FUCK WAS THAT WHEN I WAS WRITING THIS) 

Requital Chp. 2:

Here’s the thing, if you’ve gone through the trouble of decrypting this (a fortified certain-eyes-only encryption that took me a couple of hundred years to perfect, thank you very much), it at least means you’re interested, so hear me out.

i like this line a lot, for a few reasons. drifter knows avia well enough at this point to be well acquainted with her temper and lack of time for dealing with his nonsense. it’s the first flick of the coin between the two of them, drifter laying the proverbial gauntlet down and at the end of the day, its up to her whether or not she picks it up. 

and she does, avia asks levi to decrypt it, and the first thing she sees is drifter acknowledging that shes done so and asking her to at least hear him out. he’s kind of caught her out, and she can respect that even if thats not at the forefront of her mind. avia also has her own brand of curiosity when it comes to people like the drifter, so this is kind of the first inkling of that. and it also (i hope) makes you wonder if drifter is aware of that curiosity that she has, if he sent the message decrypted on purpose to get her interested. 

She smiles at the note, throws her legs over the bed and stretches around a yawn. Five minutes later, Levi puts her in her armour.

“Are you sure you don’t want to stick around?” The Ghost asks. “We don’t have anything urgent to do. There’s breakfast here.”

Avia hums, considering. She moves into the kitchen, glances over the fridge, the cupboards. She looks then onto the sofa, the sprawled pillows, untidy blankets. Suddenly the armour on her body feels heavy, out of place, like the metal has no right being somewhere like this.

“No. I’m not hungry, let’s go.”

“Okay,” Levi says in that tone of voice that lets her know they aren’t buying it. “Should we walk, or transmat?”

Avia notices the balcony door is still open. She walks over and closes it, the streets barely alive as one or two civilians walk to and fro, glancing idly at each other as they pass. “Transmat.”

avia immediately makes an comment about being all domestic with rook in chapter 1. its just not something that suits her in her own mind, and that line (even though i havent waffled about it bc dear god theres too much here already) was something i immediately knew i wanted if i was going to write a day of domestic bliss with her and her fiance, because i knew it’d be a hard thing for her to just get on with like a normal person aha. 

so, we get this part in chapter 2. the domestic bliss is over, and what avia knows best, what shes always known best, is a set of armour and getting back to work. however this part of herself contradicts that which she’s experienced for the past day, and especially the line ‘Suddenly the armour on her body feels heavy, out of place, like the metal has no right being somewhere like this.’ i put in to really reinforce that idea. its not the metal that feels out of place in this scene, its the person in the metal. and her eagerness to transmat straight to the tower rather than walk through the peaceful city streets shows her tendency to run from such thoughts.

this part came really naturally, actually. its a small snapshot into a bigger struggle avia has with herself (especially given the dreaming city, the reef, petra and now potentially going back to the worst part of the shore with drifter) of where she belongs, and more importantly, if she deserves to belong. which is why levi talks to her in that tone because they know what shes doing, theyve seen it so many times before – avia in a scenario that resembles something normal and running from it with no one around to stop her, because in her subconscious she doesnt believe she deserves it. 

“Ada-1, I believe, has fully settled into the Tower. She becomes more and more tolerable of the Guardians by the day. And with the discovery of Niobe labs, her mood has been favourable.”

i had no idea how fun scarlet was to write until i got to this part. she almost has her own language, really. writing ‘im really proud of ada because i spent all morning with her and she was only snippy with like two guardians and shes been really uplifted and im really happy for her since they found niobe labs’ in scarlets own ‘okay but heres the relevant information’ way of explaining things is a challenge but FUN. like, really fun?? 

because scarlet wouldnt be mentioning adas mood if she didnt care, ya know? and its not that she cant say that longer thing about being proud and stuff, its just that she doesnt see the sense in it and its not important information. like, if avia and eden were to spend a dedicated amount of time whittling her down she would absolutely say ‘i am so proud of ada and also i wanna smooch her face how do i do that as an exo’ but its just not a thing for her. but part of the reason why ada and scarlet being together was an idea that i had was because i imagine that line of thinking probably suits ada. 

“It was at Ada’s request. I had more knowledge of the area in its current state, and felt more comfortable talking to Ikora and her Hidden agents than Ada did…”

supportive exo girlfriends. that is all. man ive gotta write more about these two

“Hmm,” Ada wears a concerned stare masked behind a formal rigidity that Avia knows her Warlock teammate best for.

if im being honest, i just really enjoy this line. i imagine its hard for exos to show concern, esp a character like ada and my girl scarlet, so avia has spent a lot of time dissecting certain facial cues and yeah im proud of how this description came out aha

…as if she hadn’t spent the past few months clipping sidelong comments and threatening him when his Gambit veered out of the realm of her control.

avia is a control freak. plain and simple, and i wanted to make that as obvious as possible considering this sentence is only a few away from avia choosing to go and talk to drifter. 

there’s a certain amount of ‘i need to understand this thing that i have limited knowledge on so i can predict/control/plan for it in the future’ in how avia views drifter in general, its a kind-of warlock way of thinking about things but the big difference is avias need for control in these situations is a) selfish and b) only applies to things that she knows she has a good chance of understanding/taming. shes not going around learning about the hive because she has a good understanding that thats a cosmic threat that can only be defended against until it comes. drifter on the other hand is on her doorstep.

i also really loved the contradiction in putting ‘gambit’ and ‘control’ next to each other in a sentence, i kinda hoped it showed how conflicted avia is about going and talking to drifter, and maybe even how naive it is of her to think that it could turn out okay. 

She was incensed, maybe, at the way he spoke to Ada, needed to go and stomp the idea out of his head but he got her talking, like he does

i like this line bc its avia acknowledging that she knows how shes viewed. she knows everyone sees her as a hot-head, she knows her anger veers away from her sometimes and whilst she’s gotten better at getting a handle on it, it’s still an aspect of her that people who dont know her well enough find it hard to get past. 

i also enjoy how new people to this fic/avia in general might not know that this is a big part of her? so she’s trying to use it as an excuse, ‘well no one can blame me if i say i got really mad because thats what i do’ and it (hopefully) tells new people about that aspect of her character without having to show the worst part of it, the convo with ada being an introduction to it i guess – especially since the past few scenes have seen her a lot softer than im used to writing aha. 

“Dammit,” she mutters under her breath. And walks towards the Drifter before she can make a better decision

fun fact – this line was originally ‘and walks down the corridor before she can make a better decision.’ 

i changed it because i wanted to make it more obvious that avia is making a conscious decision to choose drifter, that she’s walking towards a path that she knows is not a good idea. it provides foreshadowing for the allegiance quest and referring to him as ‘The Drifter’ cements it as an idea that she’s walking towards and not necessarily a person. 

[imoutofinfires]

Dimittetur Illi~Lee Mark

HI! I am sorry this took literally forever.Hope you enjoy and dont puke:)

MasterList

Genre:Alot of angst (oops) with microscopic fluff.I Honestly wrote this and while adding GIFs I realised that i am soft for mark.And this doesnt seem like i am.

It was the first day back from summer break when it all started. I was new at this school and not everyone was friendly.I had to find my way around everything and ended up sitting alone at lunch, one earphone in and looking around cluelessly at those wild herds of “humans” surrounding me.

One fine rainy day, he walked up to my table, and sat down.I knew of Mark.He was the bad boy getting all the ‘action’ as the kids in Biology explained to me. He was nice to people, innocent and childlike ..or atleast pretended to be. The gesture of sitting at lunch with me everyday became a routine and as he talked to me and laughed ,I fell for him, like the rest.

 One day, I found myself making plans with him to visit one of those temporary carnivals in town and you may even call it a date. It wasn’t anything special, but it felt like it didn’t have to be.We never ran out of anything to talk about, so that’s what we did.It was during this time, I heard the most adorable laugh erupt and I couldn’t help but to smile as wide as possible.I fell for him more, like the rest.

 It was finally time for Halloween , but my pet goldfish had recently passed away.I was in school , lying on the floor with my costume on when tears streamed down my cheeks.Suddenly I felt a figure pulling me towards them and as I looked up , it was him.

“Why are you crying, Mark? And how did you manage to find me? “, I said.

 “I listen to you.”, he said.

I thought about what he said for quite sometime and it was the when the last candy hit the bucket , that I figured it out. He cared.My heart was overflowing with an array of emotions.I fell for him the most, just like the rest.

 I never thought of taking anything forward with Mark. He has a list of beautiful people that he’d rather be with and even though it hurt, I was okay with it.What mattered was that I had him.But that was until winter had set upon , nature displaying its vivid range of whites.Mark and I went for a cup of hot coffee and on our way back , stopped at a local park.The weather was just right for snowflakes to float its way down upon the ground. I examined one on the palm of my hand and as I turned to show him the sight, he stared at me with a small smile to his face.As we walked home,I felt him grab my hand and intertwine our fingers.I looked up to see a red Mark with hope in his eyes looking down at me, the most serious that I had ever seen him. I couldn’t help myself, and leaned towards him.The next thing I knew were his cool gloves enveloping my face and us smiling as we kissed.And that was when I was sure I am in love with Mark Lee, like the rest.

 But all good things, or those seemingly good, must come to an end.I was walking to a nearby shop to buy some groceries when on the way I saw him.I was on my way towards him, when I saw him walking with another one, as he grabbed their arm and looked as red as a tomato with hope in his eyes and as they leaned towards him, he kissed them.The next thing they knew, he was enveloping his hands on their face.As they fell for him, like the rest.The only difference was that I was part of that rest.

 Now, it is the first day back again since summer break.I still eat alone and sometimes get lost in my classes, which usually calls for detention as ‘bunking’.I walked down the hallway as I saw ‘him’ for the first time since he cheated.We made eye contact for a second, but it was broken almost immediately as he tried to step forward. He furrowed his eyebrows as I walked away from him.As if the day couldn’t get worse, I got detention again.I walked to the class and took out my notebook as I began to doodle.Soon I heard a voice that seemed bitterly familiar and I was ready to sprint all the way to my house.Mark looked right at me as he took a seat beside me.He started on to saying something when I turned my head and felt the tears pool up .The teacher, of course had to leave at some point of time and even being in the same room as Mark made me sick to the core.As I glanced past in my memories of the times we had, I don’t know what was it that I did to deserve this heartache.But the truth is that I trusted Mark despite all those once upon a time harsh comments about him, now is it that I truly understand.He never cared.

 I was deep in thoughts of my own , that I didn’t realize when it was that I started sobbing.I felt the chair next to me move and a face appear right in front of me.He looked at me and I saw pools of water in his eyes. His eyes scanned my face, trying to decipher what it was that made me this upset.I felt worthless as I looked at him but I was helpless because it had been so long.My trance was immediately shaken off as he tried to touch my face.I tried to get away from him but he hugged me by my waist , laying his head on my lap as he said,

“Please.Please don’t go. I don’t understand what is it that I have done for you to give me the coldest shoulder.”

It was now that realisation dawned upon me of how furious I was. I scoffed as the anger pooled in my eyes.I got up and as he looked up at me with fake innocence , I said,

“Wow.You really think that I am a fool?Didnt you ever think that I would find out about you cheating on me? Did you even care or was it all just an act? I fell in love with you.I would take a bullet for you and I don’t even receive the basic courtesy of honesty or respect. I am sure you give less of a shit of how I feel but why..what is it that I have ever done to you to be used like a toy ? “

He wiped his overflowing tears as he said,” I am sorry. I never meant to harm you and I know that is probably the dumbest excuse I can ever give you. But I want you to know that I meant everything I said to you. I loved every single moment with you and being with you brought a smile to my face like I had never experienced before. I know you will never believe or trust me ever again, but I can only hope.”

“Why did you do it then? If you “loved” all of it. If you are going to lie then you might as well say something I might believe.”

“What is that supposed to mean? I am truly apologetic.”

“I mean that you telling me that you used me for your sickening satisfaction is the truth. You played me and I fell for it, just like the rest. It makes me feel like shit but as long it’s the truth I –

“No. No that isn’t the truth. Its so stupid and I regretted it the minute it happened. I loved every minute spent with you. I am not lying when I say,I had never felt what I felt when I was with you.I fell for you so hard the moment we started talking on that lunch table, and I tried so hard to just keep cool and be friends with you because I didn’t want you to think I was playing with you.But that day, when you were playing with that snowflake, my heart was pounding and I couldn’t control any longer. The scary part came when we were together, I needed to be with you every day, and I was so scared.I knew I love you but I didn’t know how hard I was in love with you. And I did the stupidest thing ever.To try and get with another person.I tried to do the same things as we did but after we kissed , my heart ached and the next thing I knew was that you were avoiding me.”

 I don’t know what it was that came over me, but I wrapped me arms around his neck and he held me instantaneously. He was shook at my actions.”Please tell me if you are lying right now because this might me the dumbest thing I will ever do.”

He chuckled and said, “Thank you. I am so sorry for what I did , I never want to hurt you like that ever.I love you.”

My heart skipped a beat and I leaned towards him , resting my head on his shoulder .”It’ll take me some time for things to be normal again though.”

He kissed my forehead and nodded.

 I hope my sense of direction improves because detention sucks.

PS. For the people seeing the second GIF and being like how is this related? It isnt. This GIF cures my depression and makes me happy :)