#the secret to customer service is that everyone working is 100% done with people all of the time

[doodlemancy]

Hey there I just have a question about the Patreon stuff - I 100% agree with everything you said, I'm not too knowledgeable about some of the things Patreon has done. I know they want to get rid of first of the month and per creation billing, but WHY? Why do they hate it so much and want to get rid of it so badly??

hmmmm. i can't say i know for sure, but i can make some guesses. a lot of it seems like an unwillingness to problem-solve, honestly. there have been various excuses that i can remember-- one is that processing everything at the beginning of the month leads to all the Payment Processing Problems happening at once which, fair, understandable. hire more people, sorry patreon, you already made your bed on this and now you get to lie in it for the sake of the people that depend on it. another excuse they made during the fiasco in 2021 is that a lot of people sign up in the middle or toward the end of the month and think they've been "double charged" when the 1st of the next month rolls around, and they get charged again less than a month after they signed up. it apparently leads to a lot of customer service tickets. instead of implementing ANY features that would help patrons understand this better at signup, or allow patrons to delay payment until the 1st of the next month, they wanted to do away with 1st-of-the-month billing entirely. and like yes. this is a problem. chargebacks are bad. having to deal with a lot of help tickets at the same time every month is bad. but having worked customer service long enough: clarify your language and again, hire more people, sorry! bed made! lie in it!

with the apple thing... i kind of wonder if that's been an influence in the past and for how long. it feels like they are really insistent on changing their service's behavior to be more predictable to the average Netflix/Doordash/etc. subscriber or whatever. the rolling bill structure is the default for most stuff, and it does make sense to want to be predictable... but in general they really seem to think very little of the intelligence of patrons. which is an understandable consequence of dealing with any kind of customer service-- just statistically speaking you will encounter a lot of horses who cannot be made to drink or even led to any kind of water and it will make you think humanity is doomed. but it's weird that they're willing to trade out entire portions of their userbase for that predictability. i think some of this is also a venture-capital-driven desperate desire for wider appeal, which is the fall of every tech company at some point, i guess. the insistence that the apps no one likes are Extremely Important is what bolsters my belief that this is a misguided growth-chasing thing. like everyone else, they probably are trying to make line go up, and there's no room to be pleased with a sustainable niche in that equation.

i don't know if there are other mysterious under-the-hood reasons, like if it's gonna be better for them re: payment processing fees or something or if their processors or investors are giving them shit about it for some reason or another. it's likely there's something else they are, as usual, not being transparent about.

so yeah. it's not that i think Patreon would be easy to run. it's not that i don't see that there are some legit challenges here. but i do think they are strangely willing to give up and go straight to the most destructive solution rather than try to figure out how to make the thing work. i don't really know exactly what's going on more than anyone else does, i'm just looking for patterns.

also: i know you don't, anon, but if anyone's thinking i've been too harsh or that i'm too suspicious of patreon up-front here and am Probably Just Unpleasable... they do have a history of deceptive shit. it's been their thing for a looooong time to take secret polls only of select groups of users so they can say that their bad decisions are based on "user feedback". i actually got an email invite back in 2021 for a secret behind-the-scenes call that i'm sure they were just gonna use to try to justify some more shit. i declined and told them they should have learned by now to ask the whole community for input on big decisions, and i got a predictably dodgy answer. sigh. i wish they really cared about us.

[little-cereal-draws]

So everyone's calling for a Six of Crows spin off. I completely agree but raise you this: An Ivan and Fedyor spin off.

I've seen a couple people (myself included) say that Ivan and Fedyor weren’t in season two because they moved to Novi Zem and started a peaceful domestic life away from all the chaos. Well, I'm going to expand upon that.

They buy the plot of land next to Colm's farm. Chaos ensues in a wacky sitcom-eque style as they avoid Ravkan troops, bother their new neighbor, and learn to navigate life outside of the Little Palace for the first time.

It takes place at the same time as season two of Shadow and Bone. A season is twenty episodes that run for twenty two minutes.

--

They've bought a farm but they don't have the slightest idea on how to be farmers. Like, at all. Colm offers a helping hand and shows them how to maintain their fields but quickly realizes they don't know how to do anything. Laundry, cooking, cleaning, home repairs, etc. He's going to be spending a lot more time with them than he thought.

They keep it a secret that they're the missing heartrenders from the Darkling's inner circle because he is not very popular right now, even in Novi Zem. In the beginning, they also try to hide their powers in general, but it quickly becomes obvious how dependent on them they are.

They slowly become really good friends with Colm, endearing themselves to him despite his frequent frustration with them, and he often gets roped into their crazy antics now.

Example dialouge:

*Fedyor opens the door, angry, holding a basket of clothes, completely soaked* *laugh track* Fedyor: Laundry's done. Ivan: What happened? Did you do it the way Colm showed us? Fedyor: I tried, but I knocked it all into the river and had to jump in to get it back. Fedyor: You might be missing a few socks now. *laugh track* Fedyor: Anyways, how's dinner coming? *Ivan takes the lid off a pot that's sitting on the stove to reveal fire. No food, just fire. He quickly puts the lid back on* *laugh track* Ivan: It's... coming.

--

Possible plotlines:

Season long arcs

Them interacting with other grisha and realizing they can do so much more with their powers than killing

Fedyor interacting a lot with the kids in the community and starts asking Ivan to adopt. He eventually gives in but only after a lot of thinking and convincing

The Darkling hears that they deserted to Novi Zem and sends a small group of grisha to get them back. One inferni in that group is amplified with Bahgra’s finger bone. The big fight against them is the climax of the season. Fedyor and Ivan live but their house gets completely destroyed and they have to start all over

Epidode plots

Two or three episodes of job hunting before they start to profit off their farm. It goes poorly (ex: "what qualifications do you have?" "Uhh... soldier?")

Adding on to that last one, a one-episode plot where Ivan gets a job in customer service. It's a nightmare for everyone but humbles him quite a bit

A small home repair gets ridiculously out of hand to the point where a wall comes down at the end. They end up sleeping on Colm's couch that night

The Ravkan first army general suspects they might be a lot more important to Ravka than they’re claiming and they have to be the most Normal People Ever (tm) to throw him off. Also there’s fighting

Ivan realizes that Jesper is Colm’s son and he is not happy. Colm isn’t 100% what’s going on but he’ll throw hands with a heartrender if it means protecting his son. They make up by the end and their previously tumultuous friendship is solidified

Fedyor’s been volunteering in a lot of community projects but accidentally overbooks himself. Ivan and Colm have to pretend to be him so he can be three places at once

News of the Darkling’s death reaches them. Ivan struggles with what this means for him even though he’s already left that life behind. Colm confronts Fedyor about them working with the Darkling and he admits it’s true but they’ve changed

[kassandras-one-braincell]

I haven’t been able to stop thinking of a sitcom-style office AU featuring the AC ladies and a superb supporting cast, so I need to share:

Kassandra spends most of her time flirting with the pretty interns, getting next to no work done. But she’s invaluable when tough clients have meetings in the building and they need someone charismatic to diffuse any tricky situations, so they keep her around.

Alkibiades is the receptionist who has slept with many delivery couriers who drop off packages at the front desk. He can go from bitching about colleagues with Kassandra to a sickly sweet customer service voice on the end of a phone in a heartbeat.

Eivor gets all her paperwork done to an excellent standard, providing she doesn’t have to use spreadsheet software. She’s also the person in charge of fixing the staff room’s shitty coffee machine when it breaks every other weak. She is hiding two kittens in her desk, under the impression that nobody knows. Everyone knows.

Soma is in charge of the branch, and is a fantastic leader. Always professional. Except around Wigmund; there are no limits to how petty she can be in his vicinity, and her biting insults are always deserved because he’s homophobic.

Wigmund is only still there despite a multitude of HR violations because he’s all buddy-buddy with the CEO. Everyone hates him.

Ceolbert is there on work-experience. Everybody adores him and will fight to guarantee him a full-time placement should he wish to accept.

Phoibe is allowed to do her homework in the office after school because Kassandra is a very protective aunt and despises the school bus driver, so she drives her home after her shift finishes. She’s allowed to make paper planes out of discarded documents.

Barnabas retired recently, but Alkibiades still lets him into the office because he is a well-loved person. His banter is of the best quality, he always shows people pictures of his grandkids, and as part of the effort against Wigmund he likes to leave his glass eye in his coffee mug to freak him out.

Hytham is the office IT consultant who spends 90% of his time trying to teach Eivor how to use Microsoft Excel. He feeds the kittens in her desk when she is stuck in meetings. 100% has gained access to Wigmund’s browser history and shared it with everyone after he made an islamophobic comment.

Birna gives herself employee of the month certificates every month, even though that’s not a system the office has in place, because she deserves them. Soma has asked her to stop printing them in full colour because of the dent it makes to the office printing budget. Birna refuses to dampen her victory.

Ikaros is the office pet (unofficially, because the thought of the paperwork that would invoke makes Soma want to cry). Kassandra talks to him like she can understand him, and it concerns everybody in the building.

Synín breaks into the office frequently to torment Eivor. She eats her documents and pecks at the desk draw containing the kittens to try and rat them out. Eivor still feeds her though.

There is never a dull day in that office.

The branch has been banned from several team-building activity venues. Competitivity has many a time taken a swift turn down the route of “disorderly conduct” and “property damage” and “multiple violations of the law”.

Soma has a decently soundproof room in the office, so she can play music through speakers to keep her sane. But there was one occasion where she synced her Bluetooth to the wrong sound system, and the entire floor was forced to listen to her god-awful country music playlist for the better part of an hour. Nobody will let her live this down. She got a Billy Rae Cyrus fan shirt during Secret Santa (courtesy of Eivor).

When the computer software system the whole company uses got overhauled after new regulations were put in place, just after Eivor finished learning how to navigate the old system, she nearly had a breakdown. She picked up the kittens and took impromptu paid holiday, ignoring company policy. No one stopped her.

Ceolbert earned Kassandra’s immediate respect when he helped Phoibe with her maths homework, because, in her words, “fuck that nerd shit”. Ikaros also took an instantaneous liking to him at that moment. She tried teaching him how to flirt, but he’s too precious and couldn’t grasp it.

Hytham and Birna had a bet going on: which physical altercation would happen first? Would Soma finally lose her shit and punch Wigmund, or would Eivor punch a hole through her computer after getting frustrated with word processing software for the thousandth time? The result was...neither. Alkibiades bitch-slapped Kassandra after she jokingly called him a whore.

After hearing a complaint from the floor below over “loud desk chair skidding sounds across the corridor”, Soma didn’t even need to ask who it was. Eivor, Birna and Kassandra were all denied a homemade cookie that week.

Because of Wigmund’s connections to the top, and he’s a grade-A piece of shit, HR effectively ignores their branch. A maximum of three people would have their jobs otherwise, and Ceolbert isn’t even technically an employee.

Alkibiades has a code for when a particular client representative, who happens to be Kassandra’s rather bitter ex, enters the building. Kassandra has hidden in the cupboard under the staff room sink, under Eivor’s desk, behind the curtain in Soma’s office, and once in the ceiling vents.

Once, Kassandra was tasked with attending a meeting with this ex. “Kass, you’re needed the floor up. Odessa arrived ten minutes ago with—” “Tell them I died.” “I can’t tell her that you’re dead, what the fu—” But she’s already gone.

Ultimately they’re a very chaotic work family. But Barnabas always invites all - bar one, obviously - the family around to his house once a year for a barbecue, because family matters.

[gale-gentlepenguin]

Gale's Story Idea: 'Those of another world must die' or 'Isekai no mono ha shi ke re ba naranai'

(I probably butchered the Japanese. But the point is to give it a light novel title feel)

(Since a few people have been asking what my light novel idea was. I decided to explain it and go a bit more in-depth)

Premise: Rumors have been circulating about a Killer known only as 'Hero Eater' is targeting heroes in the Human Kingdom of Itsumo. But not everything is as it seems, Itsumo has many dark secrets and the kingdom may need a change...

The world of Itsumo.

Now the setting would be similar to most fantasy Isekai worlds. Money consists of Gold, silver, Bronze coins. Platinum coins are for the super rich.

Magic exists, Magical items exist. Levels exist.

There are dragons, goblins, the typical fantasy fair/ D&D/MMORPG feel but with a lot more twists

Summoned Heroes

When it comes to Summoned heroes things get different.

1. 'Heroes from another world' are treated above the standard people. As being summoned from another world gives them stupidly over powered abilities compared to the average citizen of Itsumo. The Elites show them favoritism.

2. Aside from obviously enhanced strength, speed, durability, and magic. They level up faster, have overall higher stats, and Summoned heroes also get some sort of Overpowered ability.

3. These over powered abilities or OPAs are ranked from S to E. Depending on that OPA, determines your lot as a 'Summoned Hero'

4. E's are the lowest. The skill is just slightly useful. Summoned heroes are still MUCH stronger than the average soldier. So these heroes are often brainwashed Coerced and put as soldiers on the front lines, or bodyguards of the elite. (Basically they are just glorified meat shields.)

4.5 There is nothing ranked lower than E. Those summoned ALWAYS have a OPA.

5. C and D Ranks are considered worlds more useful. These heroes depending on their abilities are thrown into a field where their skills can be utilized. These heroes are usually thrown a boon by the king and get funding. These heroes are the ones responsible for the innovations in technology (such as guns, refrigeration, etc). (Though in truth they have done a lot of f***ed experimentation)

6. A and B Rank are considered 'Heroes of the Kingdom'. Those heroes are the ones that you see going around and fighting demon hordes with ease. The ones you see with the harems (usually of whatever their fetish is). They basically have license to do WHATEVER they want, so long as the King doesn't intervene.

7. S Ranks. These summons are incredibly rare, but their skills are 100% broken. To put it in perspective. 1 S Rank hero could easily beat 10 A ranks without breaking a sweat. This is where the OPA's become near god like. Fortunately for some reason, only 7 S ranks can exist in the world at a time. Only when 1 dies can a new S rank otherworlder can appear. Currently the King has some of them watching over different parts of his kingdom. But all of them are considered Legendary.

8. (Little known fact that summoned heroes are often loners, losers, incels, neets, and other lesser freaks of society. Who else would willingly go to another world if their life is actually good?)

9. Some heroes do start out doing good... but power corrupts

_____________________________________________________________

Religion:

The Religion of Itsumo in stated by King Tyran. Insists that there is a kind and loving goddess (Named Oveun Ativ) that blesses Itsumo with the heroes that appear. Basically making those from another world as 'Her blessed children'.

So often regular citizens range from worshiping them or at the very least respecting them. (Though this is simply a front, the average citizen HATES these arrogant s***s. Considering the awful stuff they put them through.)

The Church also has a monopoly on Hero summoning. The ritual that they use is as follows.

1. A young girl will be chosen once a year from every village. (basically not where the nobles live.) It was considered a great honor. (and if the town didnt comply the church would inform the king and that town would be burnt down and all of the young maidens there would be brain washed and taken anyway) A maiden will be trained in magic for several years until her 18th birthday. During this time she must not have relations with men, must not touch the blood of an animal, must read the sacred scriptures and serve the church without question. (Indoctrination)

2. According to the church, the Summoning ritual will then have the young Maiden perform the summoning magic in which if performed successfully, will summon the hero and she will take the form of a portal of light which summons him. After which she will ascend and become an angel that serves the goddess. (This is not true. Its a virgin sacrifice. Those girls are killed in a ritual. Its f***ed up what the s***)

3. If a maiden summons a B or A rank hero she is regarded as an example for others to follow. For she clearly followed the doctrine of the church. She was likely Heavily rewarded by the goddess.

4. If a Maiden summoned C or D rank, they are not discussed often except by friends and family.

5. Maidens that summon E ranked Heroes are considered disgraces. Maidens that clearly did not follow the teachings of the doctrine. Their names are stricken from the records.

6. Maidens that summoned an S Rank hero. Are written into the logs as Blessed by the goddess. They are treated like Saints and some worshiped like deities. Some doctrine claim that they serve at the hands of the goddess after achieving this.

_____________________________________________________________

Economics

Summoned Heroes basically caused Economic collapse for adventurers.

Summoned heroes often hunt monsters and get rare drops, and often those with rare skills can get much more value than typical adventure guilds.

Merchants initially loved Heroes getting them rare drops but when many other worlders started selling so many Rare drops like they were common... it made rare items worth much less and drove value of such items and materials down dramatically. Newer merchants will rarely buy goods from adventurers because of this.

Blacksmiths and artificers initially also had it great. They now get access to powerful materials for cheap. Since their work is labor intensive the value of the item is much less impacted on the product. Though Other worlders with Craft skills have popped up and open businesses that have been driving other types of stores out of business since they can easily craft higher grade weapons for cheaper and faster thanks to OPAs.

The only real way to make money was in the service industry. With rare items and monsters easily hunted and sold for cheap, Restaurants, inns and Taverns have less of a thin margin. And with Otherworlders constantly moving about, the inns had constant customers. Many of these customers would throw money around and expect to be waited on hand and foot. Inns that had pretty women were often the most popular.

Brothels were very popular among Summoned heroes. Though the places that experienced the most traffic were the ones that had more ... unique characteristics. (Animal ears, pointed ears, Wings, horns.) Beast-kin were often very requested.

Societal Impacts

Women would often try to sleep with Summoned heroes. Children made with those of another world often had a chance of producing offspring with an OPA. Which meant that the kid could have a much better life.

The 'Trope' of offering the daughter for saving them was more of a way to ensure their Family had a better life. But in reality this just meant Summoned heroes often obtained harems. This resulted in declining birthrates as many summoned heroes didnt actually often marry humans. Most would simply keep the harem. Or if they did marry they would often sleep around.

Heroes that dismissed companions often left them as single mothers. Some would be lucky to remarry, but many were left single due to social stigma. The claim is that men felt insecure marrying women that have been with heroes, because how could they compare. (In reality it was more like they felt the woman had little self respect to be willing to partake in a relationship with a hero with a harem.) And the off chance the hero did comeback to the woman to find her married, the new husband was likely slaughtered. (This selfish mentality of treating women as things to be owned was disturbingly common in the summoned heroes mind)

____________________________________________________________

The Main Characters.

Oralee: A maiden that was raised in the church as long as she could remember. Her family had a lot of faith in the church and were honored that she was picked. She followed the doctrine to very high levels. Never ate meat, Never even made contact with another of the opposite sex. She dreamed of summoning an S Rank hero and bringing great honor to the goddess (As a recent S Rank passed away and hasnt been replaced yet). Though the night she along with her fellow maidens were supposed to summon heroes. The 'Hero Eater' arrived and started killing everyone.

Hunter "Hero eater": A high level individual. A skilled fighter with a plethora of weapons in his arsenal. Skilled in strange magic that seems unorthidox yet effective. He wears a skull mask with a black cloak. He wields two daggers. One Named Malice, and the other named Mercy. His goal is to kill every other worlder he comes across. What is his motive? Does he want revenge? Power? Fame? Why did he spare Oralee. What does he look like under that mask?

[prinxlyart]

I will say, I am hungry again and I have a few ask for your Willumity/Vinira headcannons. HOWEVER to be fair to you. This time I will restrain myself and simply ask for you to share any headcanons you want to share as of now!

You can ALWAYS ask for more Willumity.

A L W A Y S

But!! Since you’ve given me free reign to just play in this sandbox, that’s exactly what I’m gonna do

We all agree that Luz is hella ADHD. This girl will talk for HOURS about the shit she likes. If something grabs her attention, she wants to know everything about it. She doesn’t like being told to do things, but she loves being asked to do things. For example: if someone tells her she needs to do a thing her brain will immediately click into the “No” position and will refuse to budge. If someone asks her to do something, her brain clicks to “help? I can help? I can help with a thing for this person? Yes! I’ll help this person with this task because it will make them happy! Yes! I can help!” This is why acts of service resonate so strongly with her.

I don’t know what mental diversity looks like on the Boiling Isles considering how just. Horror-based everything is? But I’m 100% on that autistic Amity train. She has to do things a Certain Way or she’ll teeter on the edge of a meltdown. She refuses to touch/eat certain textures. She usually doesn’t know what the appropriate response/reaction is to a given conversation, especially with her socialite friends, which is why she just remains a cool mask of indifference. She’ll inspect every detail of anything that’s handed to her. She’s incredibly smart, but doesn’t always know how to convey what she knows and understands into words other people can understand. The only people allowed in her personal space are her siblings. Eventually that also stems to Luz and Willow, maybe more as she grows more comfortable with herself? But usually anyone getting in her space is overwhelming and alarming. Defo has a hard time regulating/processing her emotions.

I need to make an entire post dedicated to Augustus Porter because my boy deserves it, but I’ll toss some random things here. He has a signed poster from the head of the Illusionist Coven framed on his bedroom wall. He and his dad have bi-weekly after-dinner standup comedy sessions with each other (Perry has kept a secret journal of all of Gus’s best jokes he’s done over the years that he reads whenever he needs a pick-me-up).

Perry and Eda knew each other in school in passing. Their social circles overlapped but they were never hanging out in the same groups. When Gus is very little (like, maybe 3 or 4?), Perry takes him to the market to just wander around and they find Eda’s Human Collectibles Stand. She and Perry catch up, he introduces her to his son, and Eda (ever the saleswoman) pulls out some shiny human thing that Gus is immediately taken with. In between her and Perry catching up, Gus asks her a million questions about the thing he’s been given and then even more questions about other stuff at her stand. She actually finds it really fun to show off her human shit to someone so enthralled by it. She makes some stuff up here and there just to mess with him, but he’s too young to realize it’s a joke or not true, and takes everything at face value. We all know Eda likes to get a little theatrical with her sales pitches; she does the Salesperson act with everything Gus asks her about. She lets Gus take a couple items home just because he was such a riot and Perry insists he pay for something, but Eda just waves them off and tells him that this is just an investment in a lifelong customer. She had no idea how right she was because Gus defo became obsessed with human culture from that point on. He also picked up on Eda’s super theatrical sales pitches (because he thought it was funny and because he thought that’s just how you’re supposed to show human stuff to people) and began showing off his own “human collectibles museum” to his dad with the same theatrical voice. Perry plays along with this too (as a news anchor he’s got a great announcer voice) and ta-da! That’s how we get the boy we all know and love today. It’s 100% Eda’s fault, but Perry definitely encouraged it because it made his son so happy. That’s also why Gus doesn’t seem especially perturbed at meeting Eda for the first time in ep 3. Or for interjecting his new Human Knowledge in the moment she was patting Luz’s head. He’s used to having conversations with her about human junk whenever she has her stand up. Eda’s secretly relieved that one of Luz’s new friends is actually someone she kinda knows. It’s Perry’s kid, and Perry’s a good guy. His little squirt seems to be growing up to be pretty good too.

Eda scoffs at “nerdy” shit as if she hasn’t owned the Clawthorne Braincell her entire life. “She worked twice as hard” “-that just made me work harder than you!”. Eda’s extremely smart and extremely talented. She likely created the secret room of shortcuts entirely on her own. She probably studied in the school library constantly, but under the guise of causing mischief. And like. She probably did both. She was a potions track kid so she probably knew all the best ways to make stink bombs that she could leave hidden in the shelves. She hated school because she was so limited and stifled; she only wanted to learn magic and was told no at every turn. So when she learned magic on her own, yknow, without the guidance of a teacher, there’s bound to be some major fuck ups. Once she’s fine-tuned her mistakes though, she absolutely turns them into pranks. You say I’m not allowed to study multiple tracks, bumpikins?? Well how’s THIS!!! How’s THAT for focus??? (Half of her pranks were also just her showing off and desperately hoping to prove that she could learn any type of magic and couldn’t be constrained to just the one. Bump recognized this of course, but he had strict guidelines to follow and no Luz Noceda to call him out for it.)

Camila treasures her daughter more than life itself. I personally refuse to headcanon anything to do with her extended family or why she’s a single parent (too many variables and options that could be addressed in the show), but I do know that she loves Luz more than anything. It’s exhausting being a single mom, working as a nurse, and trying to be there for her ADHD daughter when the rest of the world doesn’t seem to want her. It hurts her so much to see her baby, the light of her life, her Luz, be brushed aside and written off as “the weirdo”, or bullied, or even outright hated by some people just because she’s a little different. She’s had to have some words with the school staff for how they treat her on occasion. Did you see that Principal’s death glare in the first ep?? He hates her. Camila’s there not just because she’s Luz’s parent, but also to act as a barrier between the principal and Luz. She would move Heaven and Earth for Luz, but it can be a lot when you’re the only adult around. I truly believe she wanted Luz to go to that camp to learn how to be friends with kids that didn’t already know her or her quirks. Even she sounded unsure of what they would do at that camp, but she had full faith that this would be Luz’s opportunity to make friends with other kids that could teach her to like....more mainstream stuff. So she could learn how to mimic their (hopefully, toned down) behaviors. She just wants her baby to be accepted by others.

This next one’s a doozy so hold on to your butts

Lilith is technically smart. And I mean that in a literal sense - she can read and understand the fundamentals of magic, the concepts and execution of complex spells, recite entire chapters of Boiling Isles history, you name it. Many adults in her youth called her gifted because of it. All she actually did was absorb the information and regurgitate it when asked. She thrived on the praise she received. What made her different from her sister is that she never wanted anything more than to do as she was told. Her biggest goal? Her dream job? Was to just be given orders by the Emperor. I’m sure there’s all sorts of flowery propaganda surrounding that, advertising how incredible it is to be in the Emperor’s Coven, what an honor it is to work alongside the witch that can speak to the Titan. But it’s literally just. Taking orders. And knowing you’re somehow better than everyone else because you’ve been selected to be among the elite. She never strived for anything more; she never wanted to do anything else but enforce the Emperor’s will because that was “the highest honor” a witch could have. As a result (or in conjunction rather) she lacks literally any amount of foresight. There’s only one braincell in the Clawthorne Family and her sister has it because this dumbass doesn’t think about anyone but herself. Instead of talking with Eda about what they should do when they were told there was only one spot left in the Emperor’s Coven, she walked away. Only thinking of how she could secure her victory. She didn’t ask Eda how she felt about the situation, she didn’t let Eda speak her mind about what her own desires were; Eda made it clear enough that she just wanted to be by Lilith’s side, she didn’t care what that meant. She just wanted to be with her big sister. Eda tried to reach out to her to discuss their cirumstances, but Lilith just walked away like the broody, self-centered teenager that she was and resolved to cheat her way to victory. When Eda knew this was her dream. Why would she think Eda would take away her dream???? She could’ve asked Eda to throw the duel? She could’ve asked her to fake the match? Or even fake sick? Or just not even shown up! If she didn’t show up it could’ve counted as a forfeit and Lilith would’ve earned the spot by default! But no, she had to ruin her sister’s entire life in an act of cowardice and dishonor because she’s so full of herself and didn’t read the fine print. She loves her sister, of course she does, but she’s so self-absorbed that she’s never seen Eda for who she actually is and wasted both of their lives as a result. And this is all just analysis of her character and that flashback, this isn’t even headcanons. I think if she has any amount of respect for her sister (she doesn’t), her redemption will have to go far far beyond an apology and taking on half the curse. When I say Lilith is a dumbass, this is specifically what I mean. She doesn’t think about how her actions will affect those around her. She was the Head of the Emperor’s Coven, literally one of the most powerful positions she could possibly be in on the Boiling Isles and still sacrificed Amity’s dignity and years of hard work just so she could be ensured that she could one-up her sister. She did this in front of everyone in attendance of that Witches Duel. She risked Amity’s credibility as a witch, as a Blight, and as a person just to fuel her own ego. It’s no wonder Amity was so upset; the witch she’s been idolizing her whole life didn’t think she had what it took to best a human that couldn’t do magic in a witches duel. That can fuck up your self esteem something fierce. And Lilith hardly seemed to give a shit!!!! She didn’t care that she just trashed Amity’s reputation in front of dozens of spectators!!!! I’m v bitter about Lilith as a character in case you couldn’t tell.

If I had to throw a headcanon in, I’ll toss one in that sterling and I have discussed: Lilith literally doesn’t know how to live her life as an independent adult. Sure, she knows how to like. Make herself some easy dinners? But that’s literally only because she used to make herself and Eda dinners when they were kids. Beyond that, she has no fucking idea. She can do the basic household chores any teenager knows how to do, but she’s lived in the Emperor’s Castle with the rest of the Coven since she joined. It’s kind of like living in a college dorm; food and a room is provided, there’s maybe a laundry service, she’s never had to pay taxes in her life (not that Eda does, but yknow). The only things she buys for herself (if she doesn’t make it herself) is her hair dye and books. When she first moves in to the Owl House, she has no idea how the household chores are done. She’s on House Cleaning Duty Eternally and the first......I’ll say year. Eda will wake her up by banging pots and pans over her head once every month and scream-singing about how it’s House Cleaning Day, pull out her lawn chairs and some lemonade, and she and Luz (and sometimes King) will just sit back and relax and watch the show that is Lilith trying to clean Hooty. Hooty does not like to cooperate with her (partially because Lilith is a special friend and partially because he knows how much joy it brings Eda and Luz to watch her struggle).

Oof I could go on but this is already one hell of a post huh? Sorry (not really) for dragging Lilith so hard; not a joke, tumblr made me split hers up into two bullet points because it couldn’t comprehend my ranting for so long in one bullet point. I do love sharing these with y’all though, they’re so much fun and I’m so glad you guys like my rambling. <3333

[imo-chan-imagines]

『 Random acts of kindness | Haikyuu!! Headcanons 』

The everyday acts of kindness our boys do and think nothing of, but are actually incredibly sweet.

Characters: Sawamura Daichi, Kuroo Tetsurou, Ushijima Wakatoshi, Iwaizumi Hajime, Sugawara Koushi, Bokuto Koutarou, Azumane Asahi, Oikawa Tooru, Akaashi Keiji, Nishinoya Yuu, Tanaka Ryuunosuke, Kozume Kenma, Miya Astumu, Miya Osamu, Sakusa Kiyoomi, Hinata Shouyou, Kageyama Tobio, Tsukishima Kei, Yamaguchi Tadashi, Haiba Lev

Tags/warnings: Haikyuu!! (anime), no warnings, fluff, lots of characters I didn't realise how many I'd done until I came to type up the list 😳, a lot of cats and dogs, cuteness, headcanons

A/N: I've had an exhausting and busy week, and just felt like writing some comforting fluff. Thanks for reading! Please enjoy! ♡

And please consider voting in this poll (ends this Sunday 18/10/20) to help me celebrate reaching 100 followers! Thank you to everyone who's already voted! ♡

☆ Sawamura Daichi ☆

Helps lost people find their way and regularly gives directions

We're talking off-duty, here Daichi puts the 'hot' in 'Hot Fuzz' 🥵

Hahaha, fuck 🙃

He's very approachable and warm, and gives excellent directions

He'll also walk them there if they don't understand or don't feel confident, even if it disrupts his day 🥺

And he's really good at helping lost kids and calming them down he feels so proud when he gets them back to their parents, safe and sound 🤗

×

☆ Kuroo Testurou ☆

Helps elderly people with their shopping bags and getting across roads

It goes against his nature to stand by and let an old person struggle, and even if they're not struggling, he always offers his services anyway

He has a soft spot for old people, 'kay? 🥺

He makes a point of getting the traffic to stop so it's safe, and letting them hold his arm as they slowly make their way across the street

They often tell him that he's 'a very sweet and handsome young man,' and 'nothing like the other young people you meet these days' and he blushes

×

☆ Ushijima Wakatoshi ☆

Gets things from the top shelves for people that they can't reach at the supermarket

It's a pretty normal thing to do, right? So he's chill about it

Except he will 100% walk down the entire length of the isle just to help if he sees you stuggling it's super cute 😩😍

But he won't smile or make idle conversation, or anything. He'll just nod courteously

It can be a little ominous, with his looming height and serious face, but most people take the gesture well 😊

×

☆ Iwaizumi Hajime ☆

Pays for the shopping of the person in front of him when their card gets declined or they don't have the right cash

He manages to offer in a way that isn't offensive or patronising he's honestly a life saver 🥺

He's very humble and casual about it

It's what he hopes someone would do for him, if he were in that awkward situation

And you never know what struggles people are facing, so his philosophy is to always be kind what goes around, comes around, my dudes 😌✌

×

☆ Sugawara Koushi ☆

Leaves snacks and a cute thank you note on the porch for the mailman

Or mailwoman! Or mailperson!

He hopes that the little gesture will brighten their tough day of work so precious, I can't 🥺🥰

There's usually a good selection, too no skimping here, no sirree 😌

If he's home, he'll give them a cheery wave through the window as well

Especially in this COVID-19 environment. Suga would really appreciate the services they're providing

×

☆ Bokuto Koutarou ☆

Spends time every week playing with the cats and dogs at the local shelters

This man is hoenstly a blessing, I physically can't 🤧

He loves seeing their little faces light up when he walks in, scruffling their ears and playing fetch, etc. and just generally showing them that they're still loved 🥺😭

And he helps take the dogs for walks too, so they get their exercise, and brushes them down, and rubs their tummies–

He wants to adopt, but he's not settled enough, so he knows he can't 😭 but it's his goal

One day 😖

×

☆ Azumane Asahi ☆

Always holds doors open for other people

We're not just talking the occasional, feebly held door

Asahi will ALWAYS hold a door open for anyone else

Men, women, children, old people, people with prams, whole families– literally everyone

He is TALL and STRONG, and he will be USEFUL

He will hold it open even if you're really far away, like the giant dork that he is 😂😂 you cannot escape

×

☆ Oikawa Tooru ☆

Often pays for the next customer's coffee in advance

Sure, it makes him feel good about himself. But, I mean, why not? What's so wrong with that?

Oikawa calls it SAOK-ing people (pronounced 'soaking') meaning: Secret Acts of Kindness Iwa-chan has told him to change the name, but he won't 🙄

Oikawa would love the touching joy of a stranger paying for his coffee in advance, so he gets a warm, tingly feeling when he thinks about it happening to someone else because if him he's literally beaming for the rest of the day 🥰

☆ Akaashi Keiji ☆

Buys food and drinks for homeless people when he passes them

He sometimes stops to have a chat with them, too 😔🤧

He's the least condescending person you could meet if you're in trouble he's so genuine, I can't

Except for maybe Iwa-chan and Daichi. They're also very down-to-earth

He'll also give them all his food vouchers that he's been collecting in his wallet to help spread their costs

Akaashi finds it hard to watch other people struggling and suffering, and so always makes the time for it when he can afford to

×

☆ Nishinoya Yuu ☆

Helps make up the numbers for the kids playing games in the park

Be it soccer, dodgeball, basketball, volleyball, tag, or something else entirely, Noya loves to see the kids running around in the park, playing games and enjoying themselves

So he's only too happy to join in when they need more players he'll sometimes recruit Tanaka to help as well

Yuu fits right in with them, both in height and mentality 😂😭😂😭

He may or may not get them to call him 'senpai' 🙄😂

×

☆ Tanaka Ryuunosuke ☆

Helps fix people's cars on the road

Tanaka's one of those people that knows how to change a flat, and so can't drive past someone having car trouble without stopping and helping

He's also a pretty good handy-man in general, and is always willing to help out his friends and neighbours with their jobs that need doing

Like plumbing problems, putting up shelves, building furniture, etc. He's good with his hands!

Kiyoko: 👁👄👁

And he'll never charge a penny! He's all too happy to do it out of friendship and the kindness of his heart 😇

×

☆ Kozume Kenma ☆

Hosts gaming charity livestreams for various causes on a regualr basis

All the donations go directly to the charity of choice for the stream, not through him, so everyone knows it's legit 😇

He also donates gaming consoles etc. to charities and organisations that help kids who are in hospital

He's a huge advocate for charities and organisations that focus on helping people through gaming, like AbleGamers and St Jude PLAY LIVE, and regularly donates to them

Honestly, Kenma is an angel 🥺 👉👈

×

☆ Miya Atsumu ☆

Gives up his seat on public transport for old/pregnant/disabled etc. people

Look, Tsumu can be a little selfish and grouchy at times, but he's not a complete asshole 👉👈

There's a line, and hogging seats on public transport when someone else clearly needs it more than him is, indeed, the line 😌

He'll do it without a second thought or a fuss, and with a smile on his face but will be low-key proud of himself, ngl

He will also get offended if someone else doesn't give up their seat when they should, and may confront them about it 😳 like, what makes you so special that you can't do that simple courtesy that even he does??

×

☆ Miya Osamu ☆

Donates food to charities and shelters

Both store-bought food and from his own shop

Literally gets so depressed at the thought of people not getting to eat 🥺

This man LOVES FOOD. And people are out there not able to?!

He also has a scheme set up where homeless and stuggling people can come into his shop for some free onigiri

This man 🥺🤧 can I please marry him already?!

×

☆ Sakusa Kiyoomi ☆

Donates sanitary supplies like soap, toothpaste, antibacterial gel, pads, tampons, etc. to shelters on a regualr basis

Literally cannot abide the idea that people are forced to live without these basic necessities, simply because they can't afford them

It's almost for his own peace of mind rather than theirs? 😅😂 almost. He does actually care on their behalf, too

But he doesn't like to make a big deal out of it, and so donates anonymously

His donations are literally a godsend to those people, though 🥺😭

☆ Hinata Shouyou ☆

Reads books to kids at the library when he's there with Natsu

And he's really good at it! He reads very animatedly, and really gets the kids engaged with the stories you can just imagine it

The kids all love him and bring him their favourite books to read!

And the parents all watch and compliment him on how good he is with kids

And this goofball just blushes and grins like a doof 😚 so freaking sweet

×

☆ Kageyama Tobio ☆

Always carries a spare umbrella with him to give to someone

He hates getting caught in the rain himself, so he keeps a spare just in case this precious baby 🥺

He's had to use it quite a few times, sometimes giving it to people he doesn't even know, so he ends up not getting it back and has to buy a new spare

But it makes him smile, if a bit awkwardly, to know that he's helped someone out, even just a little Tobio!! 😭🤧🥺

×

☆ Tsukishima Kei ☆

Steps into the road to allow room for people with pushchairs and prams

I know it might not seem like much, but this is Tsukki, guys 🙄

*Narrator voice* this is one small step for man, one giant leap for Tsukishima!

And this just goes to show that he's not as tough of a cookie as he looks

He doesn't like the idea of parents etc. and young children having to walk in the road he gets worried for them...🤭

And he does it consciously, which is important

×

☆ Yamaguchi Tadashi ☆

Spends time each week looking for the animals on the 'lost' and 'missing' posters around town

He hates to think of them out there, cold, alone, frightened–

It makes him feel nauseous just thinking about it 😣

My poor, precious baby!! He's too pure for this world!! 😭

It's not often, but sometimes he actually manages to find one and bring it back to its owner safely, which is a huge boost for his mood and confidence

He feels so valued and appreciated, and just happy that the little guy is SAFE 😇🤧

×

☆ Haiba Lev ☆

Helps strangers get their cats out of trees and other high places

What else is a tall, handsome, goofball-of-a stranger to do? 😌

Legit, he doesn't think twice. Tall people should use their height to help people, shouldn't they?

Sure, it doesn't always go to plan, and his arms sometimes end up looking like well-used scratching poles, but he's just glad to help 😇

It's good to see the cats safe and with their owners

♡°☆•♡°☆•♡

If you enjoyed, please consider voting in this poll (ends this Sunday 18/10/20) to help me celebrate reaching 100 followers! Thank you to everyone who's already voted!

© imo-chan-imagines 2020

[commission-loophole-reviews]

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[tonystarkbingo]

Title Prompt Game - Tags and Summaries

like a warm blanket - suggested by @rebelmeg

@somesortofitalianroast - fluff, snowed in, only one bed

@huntress79 - There's a reason Tony loves being in the workshop - but not the one most think it is. No, it's not that he knows the place blind, or that he loves (even craves) the attention the bots give him - no, it's because it's his safe harbor, the only place where he can really be him, and the one place that is to Tony what a warm blanket on a cold day is to other people.

@darthbloodorange - [Stony] - Steve never liked the cold, ever since he was little. But after the ice? He loathed it. It always brought up feelings and memories he'd rather keep buried. ~ Or the five times Steve struggled to find something to keep him warm at night, and the time he learned he could just use Tony.

@jamesbuckystark - Tony Stark has self-esteem issues. Only the closest of the closest of his friends know this. On his bad days, they cuddle up with him and whisper words of love and encouragement, comforting him like a warm blanket

@psychiccatpanda - [potential ironhusbands] Tony hadn’t worried when Rhodey’d fallen asleep on his shoulder during movie night.  His sour patch had been burning the candle at both ends lately splitting his time between DC and New York.  But then Rhodey had draped an arm over him and now he was stuck there unless he disturbed him.  On the other hand, it wasn’t that bad... it was cozy - like a warm blanket

@rebelmeg - self-esteem issues, sincere compliments, love confessions

@huntress79 - (WinterIron pre-Relationship) If there's one thing Bucky learned about Howard's boy in the first few weeks he was living in the Tower it was Tony's stubbornness, by times as worse as Steve's. So, of course, Bucky watched the genius. And was the first to notice something off - Tony was getting a cold, and he was fighting it. He just didn't expect the former Winter Soldier, of all people, to bring him chicken soup, warm blankets, a cot and a gazillion of other things into the workshop. Huh - who would have guessed that?

@lbibliophile-mcu - [recovering-bucky] Living with Steve was like being wrapped in a warm blanket. Nice on cold evenings, soft and comforting. But sometimes, it can also be confining, smothering. Sometimes, what he needs instead is the freedom of cold air.

Keep reading for more!

Cappuccino, extra shot - suggested by @somesortofitalianroast

@huntress79 - (Road to Stony XD) Despite working as a Barista in a coffee shop, Steve never really liked all the fancy coffees he made for the customers. Until one day, when torrential rain sweeps a new customer into the shop - hot, elegant, smart-mouthed and way above Steve's league. And pretty much the only guy in all of Manhattan to always order the same thing - Cappuccino, with an extra shot of (insert ingredient of choice)...

@darthbloodorange - [Stony] - Tony would never be seen dead walking into a coffee shop. Why would he go for overvalued, overcooked, too sweet coffee when he has the best beans imported and prepared by his very own live-in barista? He has access to the best coffee 24/7. But his barista goes on parental leave, and Tony finds that brewing his own coffee, isn't one of his many talents. So, if he is to get his daily fix, he has to go to a coffee shop. Tony is miserable about the whole situation, that is until he meets an art student called Steve working to pay his way through college.

@psychiccatpanda - (pre-WinterIron) It wasn’t a difficult drink to make.  So why was it that this guy never made his cappuccino right?  Tony frowned into the froth on top.  And part of the fun of going to a coffee shop and buying cappuccino was seeing what kind of foam design you’d get.  This guy - James, according to his name tag - apparently only knew how to make hearts.  Come on.  Tony walked back to the counter to complain again. Behind the counter, Bucky could feel Natasha’s eyes on him like a dagger between his shoulder blades.  He’d done it again, just to talk to his most gorgeous customer... who also thought he was an idiot.

@lbibliophile-mcu - "aw, coffee, no" Clint stares despondently at the paper takeaway cup in his hand, the scalding brown liquid running over his wrist to drip on the floor. When he ordered a cappuccino double shot, this was not what he meant. Another loud gunshot echoes in the street outside. Chugging the remaining elixir, he throws the ruined cup in a bin, wipes his hand on his pants, and grabs his bow. Looks like he has a coffee to avenge.

@rebelmeg -  tags: coffee shops, love at first sight, awkward flirting

Bitch boy - suggested by @phoenixmetaphor3000

@tehroserose - tags: BDSM, humiliation, consensual nonconsent

@somesortofitalianroast - [Tony/Bucky] : au: sex work, au: camboys, au: bdsm

@darthbloodorange - [Stony] - He was Tony Stark's bitch. Everything else didn't matter. Everything else was stripped away by his Master, his Sir. 100 odd years on this earth, and he finally found his place... and it was at his master's feet.

@summerpipedream - "Excuse you??" screeched Tony. He shoved his paper cup, somehow already devoid of the coffee poured in there 5 seconds ago, into Rhodey's hands before he launches himself at the asshole yellling at them. 5 times Tony was called a bitch and the one time he actually did something about it.

@tehroserose Winterironfalcon- Tony was his bitch. And that's the way he liked it. But, still, he was going to take care of his boy, in his way. And Tony had a fantasy. He wanted to be taken by a stranger, a stranger who didn't listen when he said no. Sam wasn't willing to give him to a stranger. But Bucky? Bucky looked at his bitch with longing. And Sam trusted Bucky. And Tony? Tony didn't need to trust Bucky to do anything other than to listen to Sam and his safeword. And Tony liked it that way. (Tag: Porn with feelings, It was just sex, (no it wasn't), established Sam/Tony, pre Sam/Tony/Bucky)

@huntress79 - (Stony secret relationship) Ever since they fought the Chitauri, everyone knows that Tony and Steve barely get along. Sure, they got a bit better after Tony's almost death, but yeah, it could be better. But then, one morning, the Avengers are shocked to hear Tony calling Steve "Bitch" and - even more shocking - Steve replying with "Jerk" What the heck is going on now? (the Bitch-Jerk exchange is borrowed from Supernatural XD)

@darthbloodorange - [Stony] - He hated Alphas so much. He hasn't ever met one that had a single good intention in their life. All they ever did was take and destroy. This he learned first hand when he was 15 in a back ally after saving Dorothy Elliott from a couple of Alphas. It didn't matter that he was an Alpha himself, he was small and Omega enough for them, a "Bitch Boy". Steve Rogers hated Alphas and was sure he always would. But then he met Tony Stark and his whole world changed... (Tags: Implied/Referenced R*pe, Alpha/Alpha Relationship, Hurt/Comfort, Tony Stark has a Heart, Falling in Love)

@psychiccatpanda - Tony had been called worse before - much worse.  He'd asked Natasha to be his date for the conference because the Avengers thought he needed a bodyguard for an International Energy Council conference.  At least she didn't look like a bodyguard. Justin Hammer had been trying to get his attention for a day and a half when he'd yelled it loud enough for a ballroom full of people to hear.  He saw red and turned to do something rash (like break Hammer's nose) when he felt a strong hand on his wrist.  Tony twisted around to snap at Nat when she pulled him in for a kiss.  Suddenly, swift and blinding vengeance didn't seem quite so important.

@darthbloodorange - [Stony] - Steve Rogers loses a bet with Tony, now he was at Tony's every beck and call. Steve and Tony's relationship is strained as it is, he's not sure it'll make it through this. Tony was milking it for what it was worth; making him wear the maid outfit, making him pick up things he dropped, fetching him drinks. Then Tony goes ahead and calls him "bitch boy" He expected to be fuming, insulted, angry, hurt... but Steve finds he actually likes it. Both are shocked. Maybe they'll make it through this feeling closer than ever before.

Make Thyme for what you Love - suggested by @darthbloodorange

@rebelmeg - pepperony, gardening, fluff

@tehroserose - (Steve and Tony friendship fic)- Steve had grown up with the song. A version of the song at least. His mother said it was the only thing the English had given worth a damn. When he heard Scarborough Fair by Simon and Garfunkel, he cried. Tony watched the tough soldier break down. And right then, he knew he was going to make the time to do something he had promised himself he would do. He was going to find a picture of Sarah Rogers.

@psychiccatpanda - (pre-Stuckony) - When he'd told Pepper why he had hired BarRo Gardening and Landscape Service to care for the plants in the Tower, she'd laughed so hard she'd almost fallen out of her desk chair. 'BarRo Gardening and Landscape Service: Lettuce take care of your plants!  Our prices and services can't be beet!  We also offer sage advice on selecting the best plants for any office environment.' "They offer sage advice, Pep!  How am I supposed to resist that?"

@somesortofitalianroast - Bruce wants to start a garden and put beehives on the top of Stark Tower. Tony reluctantly agrees. Bucky thinks it would be a good idea if he helps. The garden starts out small, mostly herbs and a few easier to care for plants, and grows as Bucky grows more confident in his gardening skills.

@huntress79 - (Stuckony modern AU) At first, Tony hadn't understood why both Steve and Bucky handed him a pot with what turned out to be a thyme plant right before shipping out to their last tour. Sure, it had a nice smell, and wasn't that hard to look after (JARVIS turned out to be as diligent as an auxiliary gardener as in everything else). But then, the plants become so much more - for Tony, it's a promise from "his" soldiers to come back to him. For Steve and Bucky, it's proof that Tony takes care of it - and of himself, despite their absence.

@darthbloodorange - [Stony] - Steve was sceptical when Bruce approached him with the idea of 'Therapeutic Gardening', but he trusted the man and went along with it. He admits it was nice to put aside some time for something that wasn't reports, training, team-building, or learning this new world. Something that wasn't work, something that didn't feel like this uphill battle that he had to fight alone. Unlike everything else in his schedule, he didn't have to work himself up to taking care of his plants. It became a thing after missions, for Steve to sit by his plants and water them, to confide in them. He slowly grows his collection over the months. But he starts to notice new plants in his collection, ones he didn't get himself, but he tends to them anyway. ~ Tony has been trying to look after the plants Bruce gave him, really. But will all the work on his plate he often forgets. But he tries. He notices some of his plants going missing. Plants that he was sure weren't dead the last time he checked on them, which might not be saying much... But he's sure someone has been stealing his plants. And he's going to find out who. ~ Bruce loves gardening, there were so many benefits it offered. It became a personal mission of his to get as many people into gardening as he could. However, he understands that maybe gardening wasn't everyone's thing. Bruce understands when Tony can't keep up with the maintenance of his plants. But he wasn't going to sit around and watch them suffer. So he gathers up those of Tony's plants that need a little more love and slips them into Steve's collection. ------------- (Tags: Accidental Matchmaking, Idiots in Love, Gardening, Team as Family)  

Speak of the Devil - suggested by @psychiccatpanda

@somesortofitalianroast - Lucifer crossover : Tony had heard the expression so many times, in multiple languages. “Speak of Devil and he shall appear.” He just never expected it to literally happen.

@rebelmeg - tags: hades and persephone au, greek mythology, merchant of death, unlikely lovers (i'm imagining it pepperony, but it could go a lot of ways)

@tehroserose - Tony was going to kill... well, when he figured out who had left that magical artifact behind, he was going to kill them. Because apparently, and why hadn't Thor been there earlier to tell them this?, the first dead person mentioned in front of the artifact came back. Temporarily, but who knew for how long? And guess what? Steve had mentioned Howard. Actually, Tony wanted to kill Steve for that, except he'd never breathed a word near Steve of what Howard was really like. He hadn't wanted to ruin Howard in Steve's eyes, for Steve's sake. Now Howard was going to ruin himself in those eyes. Tony braced himself as the mean, belittling words that he'd thought he wouldn't have to hear in that voice again came thundering into his ears.

@psychiccatpanda - Tony believed in science not all the hocus pocus the sorority sisters had been whispering about in not-so-hushed tones in the library while he and Rhodey had been trying to study. "I heard if you look in a mirror and say his name three times, he'll appear to kill your worst enemy." Pft - ridiculous.  He'd prove there wasn't anything to that stupid urban legend.

@darthbloodorange - [Pre-Stuckony] - Steve and Tony never talked about Howard. Ever. It was probably one of few things that keep their tenuous friendship moving along smoothly. but then Bucky came into the picture... and seemed to have a lot to say about Howard. Things started to click together, suddenly he was seeing the full picture. Howard always was an ass. Steve wasn't choosing not to talk about him out of respect for Tony, he didn't talk about Howard because the man was unpleasant to talk about. Tony listened, totally enthralled and vindicated, as Bucky regaled him with tailed of his father. About all the times Howard discredited Steve's intelligence in front of high-ranking Military figureheads, pressured him into testing, belittled Steve for his time in the USO, and ignored Bucky existence as he was just "Steve's tiresome tag-along pup" Turns out the three of them had a lot more in common than he'd initially thought. ------------- (Tags: Hurt/Comfort, Give Everyone A Damn Hug, Still Salty at Howard in that CA:FA Deleted Scene)

[ibelieveinharrystyles]

Chapter Three: It’s Complicated

Forever? Masterlist

1st February 2016 Ashley loved celebrating birthdays, she especially loved celebrating Harry’s birthday. On the morning of the first day of February she pulled herself out of bed and found her phone to send Harry a video of herself dancing to Stevie Wonder’s rendition of happy birthday. It was easier to do when she still lived with her mum because their house was considerably bigger than her new flat in London. Being from the North of England Ashley was naive when she started house hunting, but eventually she managed to find a small flat in South London that had decent enough tube connections to allow her to get to work each day. She had also managed to make it her own, making the most of the available space, each room was incredibly small, but that was how things worked in London. She was set to be at work all day and then she’d have to face the inevitable joy that was rush hour as she traveled into North London for Harry’s birthday meal. 

Following breakfast she rummaged through her wardrobe looking for something she could wear to work, but would also be appropriate for Harry’s meal. She was still yet to tell Harry about the baby and her choice to keep it, so she thought tight fitting clothes were out of the question. Eventually she settled on a grey chunky roll neck jumper which she paired with black jeans and her trusty leather jacket. Her hair was a mess as always, she didn’t even attempt to curl or straighten it, so decided to opt for a simple but effective top knot.

“Morning sunshine!” Ashley called as she sat at her desk, across from her new found friend Toby, he was one of those effortlessly fashionable people who looked painfully good in literally anything. The two of them were doing the same paid internship and shared a mutual appreciation for Colin Firth; they spent every lunchtime together, Ashley swiping through Toby’s tinder matches to find him a suitable match, whilst Toby continued to talk about his failed dates, this week's disaster was Roberto.

“How are you so awake when it is so early?” Toby sighed, spinning on his office chair.

“It’s called getting nine hours of sleep you melon.” 

“I love it when you get all sarcastic, makes me realise I’m not actually as cynical as I thought.” Toby told her as she tapped away on her computer.

Whilst on their daily lunch break Ashley and Toby stopped off at Starbucks, “What can I get you love?” the barista asked her.

“Just a cheese and marmite panini and tea please.” Ashley replied as she handed over her cash.

“Cheese and marmite? Are you trying to insult me?” Toby asked in disgust before ordering his salad and cappuccino.

“You aren’t allowed to be rude to me, I’m pregnant remember, besides it's one of my odd cravings, along with chicken nuggets dunked in peanut butter.” She told Toby sarcastically, the only people who knew about the baby were her mum, Gemma and Toby, she hadn’t intended to tell anyone at work until further down the line, but using dry january as an excuse not to go on a work night out didn’t seem like a feasible excuse, so she felt it necessary to tell him the truth. She was still yet to find the right moment to tell Harry, or Anne for that matter, she didn’t want to have to tell her best friend that her first child was born out of a loveless night of lust, well in fact there wasn’t even any lust on Ashley’s behalf.

“What ya thinkin bout pet?” Toby asked her as they took their usual seat in the window.

“All sorts, whether I should buy a crib or wait a few months, whether or not I should tell my best friend I got pregnant after a drunken mistake.” Ashley explained, biting her nails the way she always had when she was anxious.

“Whoever this elusive friend of yours is, I’m sure he’ll still care about you the same way whether or not you’re pregnant, so stop being so hard on yourself, besides babies don’t stay that small forever, in a few months time your belly is going to be the size of a beach ball.” Ashley hadn’t told anyone at work her best friend was in fact Harry, she didn’t want people to think she got a free pass just because she was best friends with pop sensation Harry Styles.

As soon as she entered Leicester Square Station Ashley regretted her choice to get the tube, it was packed, even though on the streets of London there was still a cold chill in the air, somehow the underground remained its warm and sweat inducing self. She held onto her bump with one hand, while the other had hold of the pole, not wanting to face palm on a tube full of people. Since moving to London Ashley was often successful at wrangling a seat, seeing as it was pretty obvious she was pregnant, it had taken her a while to adapt to the bluntness of most Londoners, growing up in Holmes Chapel, life moved at a much slower pace, people stopped for a chat and it wouldn’t in anyway impact the progress of their day, but here everyone was in a rush, living in their own little bubble.

Harry’s restaurant of choice was fancy, very fancy, when Ashley arrived they took her coat from her and led her to the table where Harry, Anne and Gemma were sat with several other people she didn’t recognise, so assumed they were colleagues and famous friends of Harry’s. “Happy birthday Haz!” Ashley cried as she hugged her best friend.

“Thank you petal.” he whispered into her hair, swaying her from side to side, he was dressed in yet another Styles signature look, a loose white shirt which was only buttoned half way, so his bird tattoos were peeping out, paired with black skinny jeans and chelsea boots

“This is for you,” she handed him the gift bag, Ashley never knew what to get Harry, if he wanted something, frankly he was in the position where he could afford it himself, there was no need for Ashley to buy him anything fancy, so instead she decided on a leather bound notebook with room for all his scribbles and ideas. “Twenty two eh? Pretty sure someone’s written a song about that.” She smirked, shooting Harry a knowing glance as she took a seat opposite him, beside Gemma. 

“You alright?” Gemma mouthed, to which Ashley nodded, being the generally caring and compassionate person she was, Gemma had accompanied her to the twelve week scan, and offered her services as a general source of comfort, because in Ashley’s eyes she was the next best thing to Harry.

The food was posh, and Ashley had always lacked a refined palette, the poshest food she’d ever had was when her dad took her for tea and cake at the Ritz, so she opted for what she felt most comfortable with, steak. Conversation was buzzing amongst the table, Harry had lots of questions for Ashley, he hadn’t seen her since Christmas and wanted to know all about her first month working at Capital. “Some champagne for you sir.” The waiter placed the bottle on the table in front of Harry and a champagne flute in front of each guest. 

Harry stood up, clearing his throat, “I’d like to say thank you all for coming tonight, it means a lot to have all my favourite people in one room, so cheers!” Harry told the group before popping the cork, he made his way around the table to pour everyone a glass, eventually getting to Ashley, “

I don’t want any thanks H.” She told him softly.

“Oh come on Ashley, it’s the first day of February, dry January is over so you’ve got to have a drink.” he insisted.

“I’m fine H, I don’t want one.” She replied.

“Just one, a little one.” He pushed.

“Harry leave it.” Gemma told him sternly.

“Why are you getting all defensive all of a sudden Gem?” He asked, placing the bottle on the table.

“If she doesn’t want a drink I just don’t think you should pester her about it.”

“Harry I wasn’t doing dry January, the real reason I haven’t been drinking is-” Ashley muttered.

“You don’t have to do this, not now, not if you aren’t ready.” Gemma assured her.

“What’s going on? Why are you two being secretive?” Harry questioned, the several glasses of wine he had consumed, clearly taking effect, on his normally rational state.

“I’m pregnant.” The silence was almost deafening, the light conversations around the table had stopped, Ashley and Harry looked at eachother like there was no one else in the room, she hadn’t wanted to tell him like this, she was going to tell him when she was ready. Harry sat back in his seat, twiddling his thumbs, “I think I best leave you all to it, thank you for having me,” Ashley whispered before standing from her chair, she left some money towards the meal on the table, took her bag from the chair and left the restaurant, tears streaming down her cheeks.

Gemma glared at her brother as Ashley darted out of the restaurant, “Well done Harry, you handled that with real compassion.”

“What did you want me to do? My best friend just told me she’s pregnant.” Harry replied.

“For Christ sake Harry! She’s the one who is going through all of this, and yet all you can think about is your bruised ego.” Gemma told him bluntly, the raised voices drawing unwanted attention from other customers in the restaurant.

“You two need to calm down.” Anne soothed, placing her hand on Harry’s arm, “I’m sure she had a valid reason not to tell you love.”

“Harry, be the friend she needs you to be, go after her and apologise.” Gemma instructed him.

London was dark, as you would expect, it was early February after all, Ashley made her way towards Highgate tube station, the winter frost biting at her skin as she walked. She entered the station, rummaging through her pockets for her oyster card, “Ash! Wait.” She turned to see her best friend, panting heavily as though he’d run a 100 metre sprint, the station wasn’t busy but he had drawn some unwanted attention to himself. “I’m a dick.” he sighed as he walked closer to her.

“Little shit actually.” she replied, a small grin appearing briefly on her lips.

“What I mean is, whatever happens, whatever you have to deal with over the next few months, I’ll have your back, forever.” He assured her, holding onto her elbows, so as to steady her.

“The reason I didn’t tell you was because I thought you’d think I was a failure, for fuck sake I’m nearly twenty and I’m three months pregnant and the father is a twat who currently resides in Malia and probably beds a new girl every night.” 

“I don’t think you’re a failure, out of everyone I know you’ve got your shit together, you knew you were pregnant when you came to London, but you still did it, the idea of being here alone didn’t phase you and I admire you for that.” Harry told her, “You’ll be a great mum, and I’ll be an even better uncle.” Harry chuckled.

“I’ve got another present for you if you want it? I think you’ll like it more than what I actually got you.” Ashley rummaged in a bag, pulling out her twelve week scan, “That’s your niece or nephew in there.”

Harry grinned eagerly, his dimples becoming more prominent than usual, “Can I keep it?” he asked her, unable to stop smiling.

“Of course you can.” 

“Thank you, I’m sorry I’m such a little shit.” He wrapped his arms around her tightly, kissing the top of her head, “I’m going to look out for you two forever.”

[hibabaz01]

The Impact of Inventory Forecasting and Automation in the Work Field

This blog examines the impacts of employment of Artificial Intelligence (AI) and Machine Learning (ML) in the business world. By examining the acceleration rate of this phenomenon, the blog points out the advantages and disadvantages of automation and inventory forecasting. It also points out the proposed solutions to offset job losses that result from it.

The business world tackles several inventory obstacles concerning supply chains. Inventory forecasting aids in reducing the price of these chains and improves financial projects, capacity planning and risky decisions. In addition to that Machine Learning in the age of (AI) develops forecasting ways by increasing replenishment methods and being accurate.

What is inventory forecasting in machine learning?

Inventory forecast is a procedure of approximating the forecast of a buyer by interpreting historical information. Companies refer to inventory forecasting to eliminate inefficiencies due to the incorrect distribution of supply. In addition to that, Machine Learning predicts the quantity of products to be bought during an upcoming period.

Compared to old techniques Machine Learning has a lot of advantages:

·         Speeds up processed data

·         Provides accuracy

·         Interprets more data

·         Updates forecasts according to recent data

·         Gives a higher percentage of adaptability

Will Machine forecasting replace humans in the work field?

Most of the planners in companies rely on spreadsheet-based procedures that rarely spot the complex interconnection among the drivers. However, only after installing an AI device can the source of the problem in the supply chain become obvious. Hence, Artificial Intelligence and Machine Forecasting are installing higher percentages of efficiency and greater probabilities to the supply chain.

Inventory Forecasting and automation have done quite well in most businesses:

·         Improve business outcome

·         Include robots on the warehouse floor

·         Provides information more efficiently than planners

·         Create new jobs in the process

·         Handle repetitive missions and roles

·         Cancelling the need for some calculations

A research by Forrester points out that Artificial Intelligence will eliminate 12 million careers in the US as we reach the year 2025. Moreover, Brandon White, the director of quality affirmations at Kenco, says that: “Automation won’t necessarily replace everyone in the supply chain, but it’s already changing many roles of what people do’’. For example, AMP robotics is a company that installs AI-robots responsible for sorting a huge amount of glass, plastic, and paper. In 2019, 35 recycling companies ordered AMP Robotics, says AMP spokesman Chris Wirth and by the last months of the year 2020 approximately 100 will.

Disadvantages of Inventory Forecasting and Automation:

·         The pool of taxable income is diminishing because of job losses. So how hard is it for companies to make their robots tax-compliant through the robot task?

·         Societal challenges as a result of losing the social cohesion and connectedness that come from cooperating toward shared ends and that the workplace provides which helps breaking down stereotypes and biases.

·         Legislation and the role of government considering the polarized political terrain and the highly politicized economic agenda.

·         Small government versus big government and how this might affect the prosperity of free markets and trades. Markets have the capacity to produce enough prosperity and opportunities on their own for all those who are willing to work hard to seize them. That’s why big governments will impede the development of a healthy and dynamic economy.

·         AI is still developing where most algorithms begin to create other algorithms making it hard for AI engineers because they might not have the ability to quickly solve the problem.

·         AI is a huge system that stores tons of secret business information. Hence, if the company does not bring excellent quality protection systems there might be some security issues.

·         AI needs to be controlled; it is not efficient alone. It should be given inputs to keep its functioning.

Advantages of Inventory Forecasting and Automation:

·         Robots let humans avoid harmful work and life-threatening jobs like the Bomb-Defusing Robot and SmokeBot.

·         Using Artificial Intelligence automates mundane tasks and saves employers’ the cost of training the taskforce to perform routine tasks.

·         Eliminating human error that is when computers are programmed properly, errors are reduced and the chance of reaching accuracy is possible.

·         Inventory systems work nonstop compared to humans and since Artificial Intelligence is taking a lot more place than it used to do then work now is automated meaning that fewer people are employed and the payment of salaries has decreased. Hence, the company now invests the rest of the money in developing its processes.

·          Speeds the packaging procedure and ability to introduce excellent performing businesses to important clients.

·         Chat bots allow companies to save the payment of customer service by accelerating response times.

Solutions to Offset Automation’s impact on work:

Most of the recent studies assume that half of the current careers might be automated in the upcoming years. That’s why we need to adapt to new socioeconomic procedures to meet the new century with rapid growth. How then some practical solutions should be planned?

·         Get new opportunities by investing smartly. The rapid spread of the automation promises a lot of opportunities for the upcoming years. For example, Germany’s Industrie 4.0 plan aims a 50 percent growth in manufacturing, while paying half of the required equipment. Moreover, Estonia’s growth after the separation of the Soviet Union is a great example in transforming to a digital economical country. Accordingly, Estonia in the past two years was ranked by the World Bank as a high-income country.

·         Provide more easy education systems as the rate of change increases. Schools have been following the traditional education system and with all the change concerning technology and automation it is essential to address suitable educational systems. To allow workers to transition from one career to another we need to address education in an easier way.

·         Encouraging Social Safety is a necessity if job losses come to an increase compared to Automation.

Finally, Inventory Forecasting will aid businesses by decreasing manual labour. In this process profit and accuracy of the model can be improved too. However, the transition towards Artificial Intelligence will largely remove repetitive labour positions demanding solutions and changes that should be taken immediately to cope with the high rate change.

[hungover-and-broke-student]

100 character development questions

these are fun questions so i wanted to answer them all here 

original post

001. When is their birthday?

- Today! October 10th 1995

002. Do they do anything to celebrate their birthday?

- Her parents used to bake her a cake but since living alone she just makes herself cupcakes

003. Does your character like coffee better, or tea?

- She likes both but coffee does a better job but tea tastes better

004. Do they prefer being alone or with others?

- She spends a lot of time alone and has convinced herself it’s what she wants

005. Are they in good health?

- Kind of? she could stand to take better care of herself

006. What sense do they most rely on?

- Sight, she won’t wear a hood if it obstructs her peripheral vision

007. Is your character an optimist or a pessimist?

- Pessimist cause she’s either right or pleasantly surprised

008. What is their favorite fairy tale?

- Chicken Little

009. Do they believe in happy endings?

- She does but for others, not herself

010. Do they believe in love at first sight?

- Unfortunately no

011. How would your character court the person of their dreams?

- Awkwardly try and fail at flirting

012. What makes your character embarrassed?

- Being made to look foolish or stupid in front of others

013. Have they ever been bullied or teased?

- Yep, especially in elementary through middle school

014. Detail one secret shame your character feels.

- She hasn’t been able to graduate on time and it secretly eats away at her

015. Are they most likely to fight with their fists or their tongue?

- Fists, she’ll start talking but get herself in deeper trouble

016. What is their choice of weapon?

- A box cutter she uses for work or a baseball bat studded with nails

017. When does your character think that violence is justified or deserved?

- She believes it’s justified to protect one’s self or friends and deserved when people do amoral shit. If you hurt kids she’ll curb stomp you

018. Your character wakes up to find that war has been declared. What do they do?

- Either not give a shit or join an underground anti-war resistance group

019. If they could have a superpower, what would they choose?

- Flight or invisibility

020. What are their hobbies?

- She likes sewing and crafting

021. How do they display affection?

- She’ll want to spend a lot of time with them and bake them cookies

022. What is the most beautiful thing they’ve ever seen?

- She once went out to the desert and got to see the stars with no light pollution. The view in Gotham depresses her

023. What do they consider beautiful in others physically?

- Expressive eyes and a good laugh. Big muscles are a plus too

024. What do they consider ugly in others physically?

- Those who give an air of superiority 

025. What do they consider beautiful in others personality-wise?

- If she can have fun with them and not feel judged

026. What do they consider ugly in others personality-wise?

- Taking advantage of others and cruelty

027. What is their idea of perfect happiness?

- A life free from debt

028. What makes them laugh out loud?

- A well delivered joke or clever pun can never fail

029. What sort of sense of humor does your character have?

- Some might call it childish 

030. Do they believe in the afterlife?

- She’ll say no but secretly believes in ghosts

031. Are they superstitious about anything?

- She tries to read omens but doesn’t always get them entirely right

032. Does your character believe in ghosts?

- Yes, but she’ll never really admit it until she gets proof

033. Do they keep their promises?

- Tries to, but it doesn’t always work out

034. What’s their view of lying?

- Of course it sucks to be lied to and she wants to be honest with people but sometimes you need to save your own skin

035. What is the most important rule your character lives by?

- Don’t get stuck in Penguin’s pocket and don’t go to a second location, they will kill you

036. How honorable is your character?

- Not very, she’ll lie cheat and steal if need be but can be loyal to a fault

037. If your character saw someone drop a large sum of money and knew that they could probably take it without anyone noticing, what would they do?

- If they were just a regular Joe she’d at least try to give the money back, otherwise just take it

038. What bad habits do they have?

- Smoking, drinking, drugs, mouthing off to powerful people

039. What do they think is the worst thing that can be done to a person?

- Fucking with someone’s sense of reality and/or breaking someone’s teeth

040. What is their obsession?

- She doesn’t really have one

041. Are they comfortable with technology?

- Comfortable enough, she can print a document but don’t ask her to code anything

042. What is their greatest achievement?

- Getting into college

043. What will they stand up for?

- She’ll stand up for those weak or in need

044. What disgusts them?

- Cruelty and general disregard for others

045. Does your character have any chronic medical conditions?

- Chronic headaches/migraines that’s about it

046. How do they handle getting sick?

- Not well, she’ll be mad and grumpy at herself

047. What was the last medical problem your character had?

- She got food poisoning from a bodega cheese steak sandwich, spent almost two days vomiting

048. Do they have any allergies?

- I think I’ve said she’s allergic to tomatoes in the past but I decided to change it to shellfish

049. How does your character feel about growing old?

- She never thought she’d live this long, growing old is almost unthought of

050. How does your character feel about their own mortality?

- The fact that she will die doesn’t bother her, the question of how and will it hurt like hell does

051. If they knew they would die tomorrow, what would they do today?

- Probably just have a very chill day getting stoned

052. What is your character’s worst flaw?

- Not thinking things through and mouthing off to the wrong people

053. What is your character’s greatest strength?

- She’s able to notice things others might overlook and find creative solutions to problems

054. Does your character want power or authority of any kind?

- No, being in power doesn’t appeal to her, too many people will want what you have

055. Is your character an introvert or an extrovert?

- Introvert

056. Has your character ever struck someone in anger?

- Yes, she’s not proud of it

057. Has your character ever killed anyone?

- Not purposely, she tries not to think about it

058. What is your character’s idea of a perfect day?

- It’s cold and rainy outside and all she has to do is get cozy and find a movie

059. List several phrases your character is fond of uttering. Where did they pick them up?

- “beg your pardon?” from just being southern “ex-fucking-cuse me?” a phrase from her dear old dad “suck a dick, dumbshit” from bojack horseman

060. What is your character’s attitude toward education and learning?

- She loves learning, hates the price tag attached and was never really good in school

061. Does your character prefer adventure or safety and security?

- She thinks she wants safety and security but she prefers the excitement of adventure

062. What sort of legacy does your character wish to leave behind?

- A legacy of caring for her friends

063. How well does your character handle difficult people?

- She’ll be nice in a forced customer service setting and glare behind their backs. 

064. In what ways does your character annoy others?

- She can be aloof and has been described as being “a little shit”

065. Is your character better at leading or following? Which do they prefer?

- She’s no good at leading others, she’s marginally better at following but doesn’t like being told what to do

066. Does your character prefer city life or being out in nature?

- Being in nature is nice and all but the city has her stuff

067. Does your character believe in fate or destiny?

- Not really but it makes a nice scapegoat when things go wrong

068. How strong is your character’s sense of responsibility? What kinds of things trigger it?

- She feels a responsibility towards her friends and family but especially for her fish, Gene

069. What about your character is heroic?

- She’ll stick up for people in need, even if she doesn’t know them

070. What about your character is cowardly?

- She’ll lie and deflect responsibility for her failures

071. How kind is your character?

- Depends on whose asking

072. In a Dungeons & Dragons game, which class would your character be? (wizard, fighter, bard, priest, ranger, etc.)

- probably a bard and annoy everyone 

073. In a novel, what plot role would your character fill? (hero, anti-hero, sidekick, villain, etc.)

- Villain’s unwilling underling, is in it for the dental insurance or to pay off her own debts

074. What is your character’s favorite game?

- Puzzle games, especially portal and portal 2

075. Is your character ticklish?

- Yes, but don’t tell her I told you

076. How do they express anger?

- Her fists will clench and she’ll probably yell or try to kick their ass.

077. How often do they cry? Over what?

- She either cries over any and everything or goes months without expressing emotions

078. How emotionally stable is your character?

- She’s not, though trying to work on it

079. How easy is it for them to read the emotions of others?

- She can pick up on emotions but doesn’t always get it exactly right

080. How easy is it for others to read your character’s emotions?

- Too easy, her face is expressive and gives her away more often than not

081. Is your character religious?

- Nope, if anything she hates the Christian God and actively distances herself from it. Christmas is nice tho

082. What are your character’s sleeping preferences?

- Either on her side or stomach under an absurd amount of blankets

083. What is the first thing they say and/or do when they wake up?

- Checks her phone and freaks out because she’s probably late

084. Describe your character in one word.

- Tired

085. Describe your character in three words.

- Doing her best (and failing)

086. How would your character describe themself in one word?

- Broke

087. How would your character describe themself in three words?

- “I’m so tired”

088. Is your character quiet or loud?

- Generally quiet

089. How vocally expressive is your character?

- Very, she can mask her disdain in a customer service voice but otherwise it gives her away most of the time

090. How bodily expressive is your character?

- She’s pretty expressive

091. What type of music does your character like?

- Lots of Pink Floyd and the Clash

092. What emotion does your character evoke in others?

- Probably annoyance

093. What is your character’s goal in life?

- Graduate and get out of Gotham eventually, maybe move out west

094. Name three things most would not expect your character to be able to know.

- 1) How it feels to get shocked by an electric fence, 2) knowledge of decomposition specifically human decomposition, 3) how to hot wire a car

095. Name three things most would not expect your character to be able to do

- 1) drive stick shift, 2) sneak around unheard and unseen, 3) hold her breath for up to 3.5 minutes.

096. How do they move and carry themselves? What energy do they project?

- She has decent posture but often carries herself in a way to project to others to stay away most of the time

097. How well do they adapt to change?

- Badly, she doesn’t like sudden change at all

098. Does your character like animals?

- Loves them, she’ll feed the pigeons around Gotham 

099. Do they talk to inanimate objects?

- Pretty often, she’ll apologize to a table if she walks into it and will greet stuffed animals in stores

100. Does your character dream? If so, what do they dream about?

- She has a lot of nightmares but usually can’t remember what about, usually about being watched or trying to convince someone of something and not being believed. 

[tdmaileposts]

15 LinkedIn Marketing Hacks to Grow Your Business

LinkedIn isn't just for professionals and job seekers. Sure, millions of professionals use LinkedIn every day to grow their networks and their careers, but did you know you can use LinkedIn to grow your business, too? From making connections to generating leads, establishing partnerships and creating better brand awareness, LinkedIn makes an invaluable addition to your digital marketing strategy.

At its core, LinkedIn is a professional social network. It's all about career development, professional connections, industry discussions and other types of business-related activities. It's not like other social media marketing platforms, such as Facebook, Twitter or Instagram; there, businesses have direct access to consumers that they can easily market to with status updates, images and other casual posts.

Moreover, unlike LinkedIn, brand followers on these other social networks already expect or are at least aware that companies use the platforms to sell their products and services. This is definitely not the case on LinkedIn, where blatantly pushing your business, spamming and obvious hard selling is highly frowned upon. Because the network consists of a totally different audience, LinkedIn marketing requires a different type of approach to get the results you want. [https://www.businessnewsdaily.com]

To help you navigate LinkedIn as a marketing platform, here are 15 LinkedIn marketing hacks you can use to find new customers, create new contacts and ultimately grow your business.

1. Find highly targeted customers and connections

The targeting on LinkedIn is unparalleled in the realm of digital advertising. Small businesses can zero in on the exact industry, company size and job role [of the people] that they know typically would buy their product or service. For example, if you are selling customer support software to small businesses in the United States, you can set your advertising campaigns to only be showing to businesses [that are] under 100 employees, based in America — and within that grouping, only to executives at those companies with a customer-support title. — Tim Peters, director of marketing, IntelliResponse

2. Stay on customers' radars

My company helps small businesses generate leads on LinkedIn. Clients tell us what kind of people make high-quality customers for them. We search on LinkedIn for people who fit their criteria, and then introduce them. (We do it so it looks like the client is introducing themselves, but we do all the work for them.) Then we stay in touch with the people who have expressed interest, again using LinkedIn. We do daily status updates and weekly LinkedIn blog posts to keep the client's name in front of their network. We also send monthly emails that share information about the kinds of problems our clients can solve for their customers, and share the results they have achieved for other customers. We also make offers, such as inviting people to a webinar or offering a white paper. The result is a simple, inexpensive, systematic process for doing lead generation, with all the work done through LinkedIn. —Judy Schramm, CEO, ProResource, Inc.

3. Grow your email marketing list

I highly recommend everyone on Linked write a crafted letter, saying thank you for being connected on LinkedIn, and that you invite them to be part of your email marketing list. Do apologize for the lack of personalization in the email. LinkedIn lets you message 50 people at a time this way. I added about 300 people to my email list with this method. Include in your email a direct link for the email signup. It is imperative that you have reciprocity in the message: 1. Tell them what they will receive by signing up for the email list, and 2. offer to look at something of theirs, which is a fairly noncommittal method to garner goodwill. — Bradford Hines, founder, YumDomains.com and HungryKids.org

[For a side-by-side comparison of the best email marketing services, visit our sister site Business.com.]

4. Use Sponsored Updates

With Sponsored Updates, businesses pay to push their post onto an individual's LinkedIn feed. This "pay-per-click" or "pay-per-1,000" impression feature offers demographics similar to other social platforms (location, gender and age), but one key differentiation is the ability to customize based on company name, job title, job function, skills, schools and groups. Users can target interested industries, without competing against the noise of other irrelevant companies and messages. A sponsored update can be an excellent way to promote thought-leadership content useful primarily to the targeted audience with a strong call to action. People don't want to see pure advertising anymore and want something useful for free. By promoting a firm's content (white paper, guide, etc.) through a LinkedIn Sponsored Update, a firm can target a niche audience, increase website visitors and, if the content is compelling enough, generate sales leads. — Jeremy Durant business principal, Bop Design

5. Post high-quality content

Good content can be highly targeted and should accomplish two goals. First, it should teach others how to solve a problem or how to do their job better. And it then establishes you as a thought leader in that space. Each aspect naturally leads to more business, if you offer them real value. It's basic psychology, and it gets real results. — Michael Riley, co-founder, Boxter

6. …and go viral

Posting directly on LinkedIn is the most powerful tool available on LinkedIn today. If a post begins to gain some momentum, LinkedIn will put a spotlight behind it in one of their categories, and it can get tens of thousands of readers (or more). This is a great way to improve your visibility while reaching readers in a way that would not have been possible on your own website/blog or even posting an article link on LinkedIn. — Lavie Margolin, author, "The LinkedIn Butterfly Effect" (H. Delilah Business & Career Press, 2013)

7. Give a face to your employees

Get as many of your employees as possible to create and complete their profiles on LinkedIn. These should include appropriate photos, relevant job history that includes a description of how they help your business, and professional connections. My current company is putting together a LinkedIn Day when we'll have a photographer available to take profile photos, and we'll help employees set up their accounts. — Tam Frager, marketing and communications manager, Front Range Internet, Inc.

8. Join groups — and stay active

One tip I always share for small business owners is to join LinkedIn groups that are relevant to their target demographic. Not only is this a great way to "listen in" on what your audience is talking about, there may [also] be times for small business owners to interact or offer their advice. More importantly, you can message the members of groups you are in, even if you aren't connected. LinkedIn InMail adds up quickly, so this is a great way to save money when building relationships with potential clients. — Lauren Covello, content marketing strategist, Ripen eCommerce

9. …and create your own LinkedIn group, too

Here's a secret sauce to find your ideal, ready-to-buy prospects right away on LinkedIn: Create your own LinkedIn group to start with. After you have your LinkedIn group set up, go out and join as many groups (LinkedIn allows you to be in 50 total) where your prospects are hanging out. The next step is to pick one of those new groups you've joined and start working the Members page to find prospects. Once you're inside the group and approved as a member, click on Members, then filter the list of members further by searching for certain job titles or something else to winnow down the list to your ideal prospects, and then invite them to join your group (tip: send personalized invitations). Once these invitees join your LinkedIn group, you have all your proverbial fish in the same barrel — all your best prospects in one place! You can control this LinkedIn group so that no competitors get in, and you can share great/valuable content within the group that your prospects will love. You also get to demonstrate your value/expertise for them while avoiding overt sales pitches or spam. Plus, you also have a built-in email list, focus group of your core prospects/clients and so on. This is a great tactic to build your brand and generate leads to boost your small business. — Ali Liaquat, head of marketing, IT-Serve.com

10. Make your Company page matter

It's also important to have an updated and consistent presence for your brand with its own Company profile page. Imagery, colors and content on this page should be consistent with your website and any other social media profiles the business has. The page should be updated regularly, so the brand is active and appears to be a current business. We've all had the experience of stumbling upon a company social media profile that's updated once a month, or worse, hasn't been updated in months. Creating a LinkedIn presence then not maintaining it will be worse than not having one at all. — Carrie Booher, chief marketing officer, Online Optimism

11. …and don't forget to claim your custom URL

Everyone should claim their custom URL to ensure it includes their name (e.g., http://linkedin.com/in/davideerickson). This is especially important for people who have a lot of contact with potential clients — especially for those who [are in] professional services and the B2B sector — because when meeting with someone they have not yet met, many people will search Google for the name of the person with whom they're meeting in order to learn more about them. Claiming your custom URL makes it more likely your LinkedIn profile will rank in the top of those search results. — David Erickson, vice president of online marketing, Karwoski & Courage

12. Complete the Summary section on your own profile

The summary section is the most overlooked section. You have 2,000 characters to speak to your target audience, directly and persuasively. Use complete sentences, write in first person, and address their pain points clearly and succinctly. Many people prefer to go to LinkedIn than a website. Most of the time, people want to connect with the person before the product or service, and this is your opportunity to introduce yourself to prospective clients and customers. Also, include your contact information at the end of the summary section. Even though it's elsewhere on your profile, make it easy for people to reach you. — Susan Tabor-Kleiman, Esq., owner, Your Professional Writer

13. Think of it as a numbers game

I have learned that LinkedIn marketing is more science, less art. In other words, it's a numbers game. I know that each Wednesday, I'll touch at least 2,000 C-level executives. These touches will lead to about six responses, and two of those six will become clients. Instead of attending trade conferences, exhibiting and speaking at a cost of approximately $10,000 per conference, I have built my own practice for less than $1,000 a year for marketing, $250 of which goes to LinkedIn for a Premium account. I can afford a few hours each week of my time more than I want to swallow the $40,000-per-year pill that I know most of my colleagues spend, attending an average of four conferences each year. — Greg Taylor, owner, Telecom Law Attorney

14. Avoid hard selling

Treat LinkedIn like any other form of marketing that you do, and get clued up on the latest trends. People don't want to be interrupted, so try your best to be "discovered" on LinkedIn. Read up on Content Marketing and Inbound Marketing, and apply these strategies to this network. There are plenty of people acting like hard-sell 1980s sales reps on LinkedIn, so be wise and don't become one of them. — Nikki Hammett, digital marketing manager, blur Group

15. Start with connections, then build relationships

Understand that LinkedIn is a social network for professionals to connect with other professionals. A business owner can, and should, connect with prospects, strategic partners, referral partners and other business owners. And once those connections are made, the business owner can decide how to nurture specific connections to grow the relationship. — Charlene Burke, CEO, Search by Burke, LLC

Source:linkedin-marketing-business

[wealth4living]

THE SECRET To Create 100% PASSIVE INCOME With TWITTER In Just 30 Minutes! Do This TONIGHT And From Tomorrow Morning You Will Have A Fully-Automated, 100% Passive Income That Will Continue Paying You FOREVER!

PRODUCT NAME: Auto Tweets

OWNER NAME: Steven Holl

WEBSITE: simplesolutions.club/autotweets

PRICE: $19.99/month to $197.00/Year

Money Back Guarantee: 60 Days

RATING:  8/10

Everyone loves the idea of making more money without straining. Making money in the comfort of your home is an idea welcomed by all. I am sure you are reading this review today because you have heard about Auto Tweets but you probably need more information.

I gladly want to tell you that you are in the right place, I wrote this review without any bias after a very extensive and in depth research on the product so I give you my word that everything you will read is true and reliable.

So if you are looking into making money through twitter or want to earn passive income that puts money into your account even when you are sleeping for the rest of your life, Auto Tweets is definitely the program for you.

About Auto Tweets?

Auto Tweet is software that will post automated tweets on Twitter which is a social media site in order to bring constant information about your products and services online. The tweets you send can be a source for a passive income since it works 24/7 while you only need to spend at least a few minutes of your time for making your tweets and the software takes care of posting them on social media sites like Twitter.

The tweets will help you earn cash by working on marketing your business by itself without your intervention. Its auto pilot system will deliver more results to your income with the less effort on your part to do the marketing. The system works on any social media site and it can run your business automatically and can earn you money even as you sleep.

Once Auto Tweets is set up, Auto Tweets runs almost automatically.

Thorough training leading you step by step through set up.

You do not need to know a lot about internet marketing to get Auto Tweets started.

The price is low enough to seriously test Auto Tweets out.

There is a ClickBank 60-day guarantee.

There is a discount for buying quarterly upfront, instead of monthly.

Auto Tweets is a slow burner and can accumulate good followers over time that will be interested in your niche.

Auto Tweets is hosted on a dedicated server which will eliminate problems of exceeding your bandwidth with other hosting companies.

The software works but Tweeting the same message out to a lot of people can get you banned or suppressed.

Auto Tweets has an affiliate scheme which means you can market Auto Tweets itself.

How Does Auto Tweet Work?

Inside Auto Tweets you have the ability to effectively stack, or queue, pre-written Tweets which will automatically be posted on Twitter at set intervals. These intervals are set by you, so for example, you can post every 4 hours. You can queue up to 300 Tweets, which will allow you a huge variety of messages for your followers. The idea is that you can queue up a huge collection of Tweets which will be valuable and engaging with your audience. Thus allowing you more time to do more productive things instead of constantly seeking our fresh and continuous material to post on Twitter. The key here, which Steven does point out, is to provide valuable information and not try and sell to frequently.

You are also shown :

How to get more Twitter followers by using a simple technique of finding niche related influencers and following their followers. This is a clever trick because they are highly targeted and very likely to follow you back.

​How to monetize Twitter by finding ClickBank products to promote on your Twitter page. Steven covers what factors to consider when choosing a product to promote.

​How to set up automatic news updates by linking up to Google Alerts and automatically posting to your Twitter feed with keyword targeted and related content. This is quite a clever feature because it allows you to automatically post very informative and engaging content which is already popular on the Internet.

How to add royalty free images to your tweets. You are shown some great websites where you can find royalty free images which you can use for any purpose. These sources are incredibly high quality and have a huge database of relative and beautiful pictures you can use in your tweets.

>>>>Click Here And Watch the following video that will take you behind the scenes and reveal the secret blueprint for creating a 100% PASSIVE INCOME with TWITTER in about 30 minutes! <<<<

Facts you need to know about Auto Tweets!

You will be able to generate an income that is passive and in consistence, that is when you decide to buy this software you can be assured that money will always flow into your account.

The unique auto-pilot system works to ensuring that once you are signed up all work is done for you.

Your followers are able to receive important and valuable content every time, new information about your business is posted to them if and when it arises.

The effectiveness of this system keeps your followers happy and fulfilled; this will propel them to keep coming back for more.

The program keeps everything on the server. There is a simple guide that you can follow step by step when you access the member’s area.

You never need to worry about paying for the very expensive servers and broadband rates, that’s not even it, when you buy this software you will not even need a website!

The advantages about Auto Tweets

One of the advantages of using the system is its ability to run your business in auto pilot condition by using the feeders on your site. The software is also easy to use and there is no need to download and install it. It is also compatible with any computer system. Novice in affiliate marketing will benefit from the Auto Tweets since it will do all the marketing of their product automatically with the less effort on their part.

There is less worry if you are a newcomer and doesn’t know much about the technical aspect of running the software. If you are too busy to run your business social media site on a regular basis the Auto Tweets auto pilot system will do the work for you. This way you will never lose contact to your followers no matter how busy you are. Because everything is automated you will be required less effort than you would spend for marketing your products manually. The product also comes with a 60-day money back guarantee.

The disadvantages about Auto Tweets

You will need an internet connection in order for the Auto Tweets software to work continuously. You also need to follow the instructions strictly when initially launching the software to your social media sites which you need to do correctly to successfully integrate the program to your social media accounts.

Conclusion

If you ask is Auto Tweets a scam? it is reasonable to say that it is a legitimate software in the market that can help you enhance your social media marketing efforts.  It works well on different social media sites especially Twitter that can help you maintain contact with your followers and generate you passive income without doing so much since the automated system of the software will do the rest of the work for you. The price for the subscription is also affordable and you can cancel anytime so there is not much to risk on your investment for trying out this product.

I strongly recommend this program. It worth trying because it will not disappoint you, the positive customer reviews, the 60 day money back guarantee, the affordability of buying the software are reason enough for you to give this product the benefit of the doubt.

Auto Tweet software system by Steven Holl is quite something I must say. I am almost coming to the end of this review and you will agree with me that this program has a lot of advantages for you, information you need has been given to you, the decision is yours to make!

They have 60 days unconditional money back guarantee. So you do not need to worry about losing your money if in case you buy the product but find that you are not satisfied or happy with it because of any reasons you might have.

Take your time to go through the customer reviews. You will be surprised at the very many positive reviews people are giving. The product has changed the lives of many people, proof enough that it is legit.

To begin using AutoTweet, CLICK HERE to get instant access to the members area. Steven has created a series of easy to follow step-by-step videos that will help you to get your first AutoTweet campaign up and running TODAY. No previous experience needed! AutoTweet is totally beginner friendly. Go Click Here to get started now!!!

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[prorevenge]

Make me quit the day before my birthday? Have fun getting fired.

TL;DR at the bottom.

Quick background: From 2009-2012 I worked at a local quick lube chain. Oil changes in under 20 minutes only using a trusted oil brand etc. etc. Going into this job I assumed that’s all I’d be doing. Quick oil changes & the occasional tire rotation. I was wrong. Working for this specific chain its all about the extra services and products to bang customers over the head for that they might actually need, but not for double the price of the local auto parts store. Maintaining a higher average sale every month was very important for keeping your job. And just for reference the district managers wanted all service techs to at least have a $60+ average every month. A basic oil change was $35. On average we would do anywhere from 20-50 cars a day depending on the day of the week in a 3 bay garage. Its also worth noting that if you maintained a high monthly sales average consistently, you were considered better than everyone else and put at the front of the line for promotions. It was also very common for someone with a high average to go from a tech to being a manager of their own store within a year. Yes, there was a high turnover rate. And yes, it was most certainly due to management consistently hiring drug addicts and not running background checks on people. Now starts my story.

Over the course of my employment I worked my way up to being a shift supervisor. This was one position below assistant manager, but I still held keys to the shop and had the alarm systems code. I opened and closed the shop regularly and if I wasn’t too busy with college I could have been an assistant manager any time I wanted. Managers i worked with loved me & the district manager as well. It was honestly a fun job made a lot of friends working there that I still am friends with to this day. But then we got a new manager we’ll call Johnny.

Johnny was a dick. Younger guy, 25 at the time, thought he was hot shit cause he held an $80+ sales average consistently since he started. Some people considered him a blessing because he helped other techs get their averages up too. Turns out he only helped them to make himself look better for raises and promotions.

Heres a quick list of things Johnny did once he took over my store. Consistently disappeared while working for hours at a time to go walk around talking to the local college girls. Left every Saturday (the shops busiest day) 3-5 hours early and would have someone else clock him out at the end of the day. I soon discovered he lived in the next town over from me and knew people that knew him. “Johnny? A manager? Last time i saw him he was so coked up he punched himself in the face till he bled. He dropped out of high school and ended up living in the park for a while. How’d he get the job with no diploma?” He was bipolar so screaming matches and temper tantrums became a regularity. We had an employee that I believe had some form of autism and Johnny would make him do dumb stuff cause he thought it was funny. He dumped a mop bucket filled with dirty water on the shops floor as soon as I finished mopping it at the end of the day cause I pissed him off somehow. He got people that he didn’t like fired by making fake schedules showing they were off for 3 days straight when they were actually on the schedule to work and when the employee didn’t show up for the shifts he would write them up in secret for a no call no show for each day but didn’t tell the employee until they came in for their supposed shift and would fire them on the spot. “If you want to argue call corporate.” And now my favorite thing he did often that I walked in on him doing. Remember how I said he held a $80+ average? Well he did that by ripping off elderly customers by lying to them about their cars selling them services that either weren’t actually getting done or weren’t even needed and selling parts weren’t even parts the car had that could even be replaced or just wouldn’t be getting replaced.

I discovered his little scam by getting stuck closing the shop so he could go home a few hours early. I decided to use the time to go through the days invoices and finding two huge sales on cars that I worked on. Only problem was that I didnt do any of the services on either of those cars. Hell, one of the invoices said the transfer case & rear differential were serviced. Those dont exist on 2011 Honda Civics. I then started watching the customers he would ring up and write down notes like the car, time, and customer. At the end of the day Id find those invoices and get the internal numbers. At the time I didnt think I’d ever use these notes, but 100% thought they would be useful. And it certainly was useful the day before my birthday.

I requested my birthday off 2 months in advance by submitting a formal request form and handed it to the assistant manager who just started learning how to make the schedule and left a copy on Johnny’s desk. The day before my birthday Johnny and the assistant manager were looking over the schedule in front of everyone to see who was working the next day and when he discovered I was off he asked why. To which the AM replied, “well yeah he requested it a while ago didn’t you see the form?” Johnny replies with, “Yeah I did....fuck that. Request denied fa**** you’re working tomorrow. Got a problem with it turn in your keys now cause if you don’t show up you’re fired.”

I promptly changed into my street clothes, took the key off my key ring, handed it to Johnny, and left. He called me back a few hours later begging me to come back but I would still have to work on my birthday. I laughed for a few seconds and hung up. Now its time for the revenge.

I got in contact with someone in the corporate office a few hours away, explained the situation that had occured in the morning, and gave a few examples of what Johnny was doing wrong at the store. They asked if I could email them everything I had and promised they would look into it. The DM gave me a call asking if I wanted to work at a different store, but I turned it down deciding its time for me to move on. The job made me hate cars and people so it was time to move on. I didnt hear anything about it for a while till the guy who is now my best friend calls me laughing hysterically with news about Johnny.

Apparently Johnny had been begging for a raise or a promotion to start training people to become managers so he would be out of the stores & customer service completely. One day he got a call from the corporate office to discuss this. He was beyond elated and told everyone who would listen. Turns out that was a lie. They had him drive 3 hours away to sit him down to review footage of the things he’s been doing, going over those bogus invoices, and listen to voicemails of customers calling and complaining about getting ripped off. He was immediately fired.

Found out he ended up never finding work in the state again and actually ended up moving a few states away.

Myself I ended up in a different industry working for the state making way more money with a ton of benefits. Unless Johnny hit the lotto, the winner is me.

TL;DR Jerkoff manager acted like a jerk and ripped off old people to make himself look good. After he forced me into a position to quit I snitched. Few weeks later he drives 3 hours away to corporate a meeting where he thinks hes getting a raise or a promotion, but he actually ended up getting fired.

(source) (story by TonyDimelo)

[weshouldbebros]

House crossovers imo

Gryffinpuff

-Probably used to taking care of everyone and their shit (but still a bit too irresponsible to be the “mom friend”)

-Probably burned the cake they made on a whim, but they iced the shit out of it so it’s probably fine

-Surprisingly not afraid of most things, and will hold your hand on the roller coaster or kill the spider in the bathroom if you ask them nicely (or they pity you and your average person fears)

-Manages to convince you to join them on all their social occasions, even when you know they’re probs gonna ditch you accidentally (as they’re usually pretty popular)

-Really enjoys spontaneous adventures together that they can cherish and remind you of (or embarrass you with) for the foreseeable future

-Has a painfully stubborn savior complex that will definitely get them into hot water until they start to become picky about the company they keep

Gryffinclaw

-Will NEVER cease to challenge you (and thus themselves) until you agree to a duel of some kind (Mortal Komat, competitive trivia, puns,etc)

-Loves intellectual debates that can go into the night (and will fight you even when they know they’re wrong)

-Forgets to eat and shower sometimes when they get busy/interested with something, but will always make time for the things/people that matter to them (you may have to help them remember their self-care is just as important)

-Dominates the aux cord in the car, regardless of if they’re driving, to exemplify their exquisite music taste bc everyone NEEDS to know this band or obscure artist (and it is probs something you’ve never heard before)

-Is probably really involved with activism and has opinions copious enough to fill a stadium, but still manage to make safe spaces for people to speak for themselves

-DEFINITELY has a compulsive need to buy books for their expansive library but procrastinates to read them when there is perfectly decent fanfiction, fanart, and fanbloggs to keep them occupied (or obligatory work to be done)

Slytherdor

-Has a really put-together life and resume and has everyone convinced they’re an invincible bad ass bitch (and they 100% are), but cries as a daily night time ritual

-Enjoys a good roast to show affection

-Has a problem admitting they need help sometimes, and hate the fact that they can’t do absolutely everything themselves (and they probably can tbh but that doesn’t mean they always should). Is open to collaborative work, though, if they trust you’re committed and that your help is actually helpful 

-Will give the best advice when you’re going through hard life shit, and if they can’t figure out how to directly help make your life better they’ll make sure you’ve got company in your misery

-Partakes in a healthy amount of leisure/labor time, bc they’re equally as lazy as they are ambitious. Schedules in self-care on the calendar, takes needed rest, and doesn’t shy away from earned indulgence

-Is most dangerous when bored and aimless (left to their own devices)

Ravenpuff

-Probably the diplomat who settles arguments with equal parts fairness and reason (sometimes relied upon too heavily for arbitration and peacemaking), and can find themselves uncomfortable with their own anger and avenging their own situations because of this reputation 

-Is an Idealist but is also a realist, and has probably had a crisis about which camp they should set their stakes in to make the world a better place (openly acknowledges it’s a shit draw, let’s not play around)

-Experiences shame for liking “basic” things, that are sometimes even “problematic,” and not always challenging themselves with more scholarly/ enlightened pursuits (but acknowledges that shame is a public emotion and is perfectly content being basic from the privacy of their own home)

-Has hidden diaries somewhere, and they’re definitely filled with cringry poetry  and other people’s secrets they’ve collected over the years

-Baking is a form of worship, the kitchen is their temple 

-Is a lot more witty on their own than in a group setting (they only want a select few to know how powerful their opinions are and what they can do with them)

Slytherpuff

- Has this weird hang up about showing people how hard they work to accomplish their goals (probs bc they’d have to acknowledge how much they care) 

-REALLY loves collaboration and doing things with their “squad” bc they love unity and fraternity and they probably say shit like “teamwork makes the dream work” unironically

-Excelles at customer service bc they’ve spent their whole lives getting to know how people work/how to manipulate a situation to a desired result (also v good a job interviews and dates for the same reason)

-Certified bullshitters who know how to work with what they’ve got and still manage to be better than you

-Judgmental as hickety heck, but tries to hide it (and may furthermore judge themselves for being stubborn about what they perceive). They have pretty high standards and pass everything and everyone through that lense

-Fluid af and probably bi

Slytherclaw

-Will be the most efficient in helping you organize and prioritize your life, bc they’re excellent problem solvers, but don’t always know how to help themselves (unless they can make the “mom friend override” work backwards)

-SUCCESS AMNESIA is alive and thriving inside their sad little serotonin deficient brains, despite how much “potential” they’re told they have

-Seem a lot more open than they really are bc they like talking about experiences and the human condition, but you don’t get to see their pain or emotions in detail

-Reciprocity is their love language and probably the only way you’ll get them to like or respect you

-AGGRESSIVELY subscribes to the “illusion of asymmetrical insight” (think they know themselves and everyone else BETTER than others know them or themselves)--and thrive in the fact that they’re self-aware (pretentious *cough*) enough to know what the theory means in the first place

-”Perfectionist” is a slur (but probably warranted)

[hopoo]

DEADBOLT Q&A

I tried to answer every question as honestly as I could, so I hope this is a good read. If your question isn’t there, it’s either identical to another one asked or joined together with another question. Cheers!

Q: In total, how much time does the campaign of Deadbolt span? It’s hard to tell, what with it being infinite nighttime and all.

A: I would imagine a month-ish. It is implied that the Candles are doing some sort of investigative work between missions, which would surely take some time. Q: Did you have any major inspirations for the visual design of DEADBOLT? A: John Wick is obviously the biggest one! Q: What would hopoo do if someone made a game completely based and inspired from Deadbolt and its… Concept? (with permission and not) A: There’s no way DEADBOLT is that unique in settings or thematics – ultimately, you know what’s right and what’s wrong when you’re inspired by a work, and so will everyone else! If you feel obligated to ask for permission, maybe you’re not exploring enough original ideas? Q: When will we get modding? if so could we get a simplified modding kit? Any plans for updating dedbort, even just the map editor? Feature for adding custom sprites, rotation tool, copypasta tool, just to name a few… A: So the thing with that is that the map editor is only half the equation – while the map editor may be writing stuff to files, it also has to be interpreted on the end by the DEADBOLT game itself. Therefore, adding features that aren’t supported in engine simply won’t work – it won’t know what youre talking about. While rotation is supported in the engine, it doesn’t know how to read that from the files, etc. I also am trying to avoid any legacy issues where old maps are required for old versions of DEADBOLT, or vice versa. Q: When is deadbolt 2 coming with werewolves and mummies A: Werewolves aren’t undead you dingus. But mummies could be cool.

Q: Will the stuff that came with the release of Deadbolt on Play Station, will be added on PC? A: Nope, that was sorta our deal-sweetener for getting on the Sony consoles. Q: Will we ever see expansion levels for Deadbolt or would we get Deadbolt 2 instead? A: DEADBOLT 2 maybe sometime

Q: Does Ibzan is gay? A: I haven’t really thought of the sexual orientation of any of the characters, and I definitely don’t want to pull a JK Rowling and retroactively assign them. So in terms of canon, that just hasn’t been explored.

Q: Would you prefer deadbolt 2 to be in 3d and 2d? Would you do a sequel? A: DEADBOLT is probably the narrowest design space I’ve worked with – there’s no dodging, insta death, insta travel attacks. By the end I felt very stretched out in terms of enemy design, and for that alone I’d think 3D. But hey, I may also just hate 3D by the end of RoR2 so who knows :^). I’d love to do a sequel one day, most likely from the perspective of Ibzan. But who knows! Q: Did Ibzan want to kill the Fire, or just try to reconcile with it? A: He just wanted to talk – but who knows what would’ve happened after the Fireplace rejected him? Q: Would you be interested in going back to the world of deadbolt sometime in the future? I remember hearing somewhere a 3D concept would be interesting to work on. A: I wish I was talented or driven enough to write comics for it – I think DEADBOLT is more about the stories of individuals, compared to RoR who is a story of the universe. I wrote the Cassette Tapes to reflect that. Q: Looking back, is there anything you’d change about Deadbolt? A: Hmmm… I just wish I somehow could expand more on the lore and gangs, and what their goals were. Gameplay-wise, it was a tad too short. I liked doing a few standard stages, and then a mix-up stage (sniper, trap, boss, etc) – maybe we could’ve fit in a few more rotations. Q: What’s your favourite loadout? A: Death/Taxes and Flashbang, like a scrub. Q: Would you ever be interested in restarting the asset suggestion thread A: I consider DEADBOLT to be done – as a 2 (now 3!) man team, we financially can’t do the games-as-a-service thing like most big companies can for smaller games like DEADBOLT. I also intended DEADBOLT to be a one-and-done thing as a contrast for Risk of Rain, which we updated for years after release.

=CONTROVERSIAL OPINION ALERT= I personally also think that EVERY game getting a bunch of DLCS and updates and patches for a long time is, in a way, exhausting as a player. I think it makes it hard to feel satisfied when you finished a game and it’s over and you feel completed in the journey, knowing it’s not ~technically~ over until the devs stop patching. I think it’s great for some games (mostly multiplayer-based ones), but some games you just gotta let… finish, on a good note. Semi-open ended endings are always unsatisfying, in my opinion, and so recently it just feels like you don’t ever complete a game. …On the flip side, we are planning on doing lots of post-launch support for RoR2 because it’s actually inline with our design goals, so don’t fret! Q: Will bugs like Scythe not having a cover sprite or some enemies not having a falling sprite (which causes the game to crash) be fixed? A: Which enemies have been missing a falling sprite? They should be resorting to idle, not crashing. Bosses? Q: Just wanted to say, you guys are my favorite games studio, hands down. Now for the question: Now that the Reaper has completed his task and is allowed to rest, what’s next? Is the Fireplace going to keep him resting for a while? Does our MC have another task to accomplish? A: The Fireplace has never let a reaper “rest” before - the reason he is allowed to rest is because Ibzan never got to, and the Fireplace is trying something different with you. This is unexplored territory for the both of them – presumably he just pets his cat and gets bored before getting back to work. Q: What happens to everyone else in the afterlife? A: People who aren’t in the Place? Who knows, and who cares about boring happy afterlife 😊 Q: I had a question about the lore. There’s mentions of places outside the city, across the river Styx. What are they and what are they like? A: The Styx connects the other realms together, including (presumably) wherever the demons came from. This is explored lightly in one of the demon cassette tapes. Q: Will you ever expand more on the world of deadbolt or are you 100% done with it at this point? A: Nope definitely not done, really wanna explore more one day Q: What’s your office address? For post and stuff, maybe I want to send you a box full of A4 sheets of paper with a thousand hoopters on each. A: Maybe this is the paranoia in me but I’m not comfortable posting my address online – you can just tweet it at me a thousand times instead Q: Did Ibzan think the flames would give warmth to the Dredged or was he just lying to them and using them for his own gain? A: He was lying to himself, but he did truly believe that this was going to work, because this (at the time, anyways) seemed like the only way out. Metaphor woawoawo Q: Could you add some sorta DEADBOLT reference into RoR2?  Will the Reaper be playable in Risk of Rain 2 as a bonus? A: Definitely references happening in some form, but playable might be stretchin’ it a bit, especially since it’d be taking up the slot of some more in-universe secret character. Q: How excited are for RoR2? A: Honestly very nervous for the reception, with very big shoes to fill as a sequel for RoR. I just hope people like it, and that we don’t get burnt on 3D because there’s so many possibilities in the future for our games in 3D. Q: How are the Demons born? We know they’re made in birthing chambers, but then is it just like humans or is there anything specific needed for a demon to be born f.e. skeletons>suicide, zombies>overdose, etc. A: Demons aren’t undead and don’t naturally exist in the Place, which is why they have to be smuggled over – they exist in whatever version of hell is in the DEADBOLT universe, and are natural denizens of the underworld. Q: was izban hot before he died? A: The hottest Q: do all the nightclubs canonically have chris c. as the dj A: Yes Q: I love Deadbolt very dearly and i’ve listened to its soundtrack (particularly “Now I Am Become Death”) more times than i can remember. What’s your favourite tune from Deadbolt ? A: Defunktorum or The Proverbial Dust Biters Q: In the Hardmode Cassette Tape it talked about a Reaper that wasn`t the current Reaper that we play as in the Game. Was this Reaper Izban? Since in the tape, he talked about the fireplace as his friend and that could be why he wanted to go back to the fireplace through the portal at the end of the game, to revisit his friend. A: Yes yes and yes. This was most heavily implied in Ibzan’s “home”, which parallel yours. Q: Will RoR2 still have opportunities to create silly messy builds like covering the screen in missiles or releasing an endless stream of Thqwibs? If so, how are you working to mitigate the performance impact of those crazy builds? A: Yep! Currently we have a system that detects the average particle count in a scene and slowly adds a chance non-important effects (like hitsparks or impacts) don’t ever spawn. This will at some point also involve turning off expensive effects and reducing particle LODs. Q: I really love the attention to detail to the characters, environment, aesthetics and gameplay mechanics. Its themes on the criminal underworld and the supernatural give a unique identity in a high-octane/stealth pixel action game I have not seen before. Additionally what prompted or inspired you to make DEADBOLT in the first place? A: DEADBOLT in its entirety was supposed to be not-Risk of Rain. It’s a gorey, violent, moody singleplayer puzzle-stealth game. We were just burnt out from the Risk of Rain experience, and we also wanted to flex our design muscles a bit and show that hey, we’re not just a one-trick pony of gamedevelopment :^) Q: I just played through this game on PS4/Vita over the weekend. Huge fan of Risk of Rain. Even bought it through Limited Run Games. So I had to pick up Deadbolt (Didn’t previously know you had made it either.) and I love it. Its a super solid experience. I’m not sure I have any questions about it. I guess I was curious if co-op multiplayer was ever considered in development? Keep up the great work. Can’t wait to see what you guys make next. A: Nope, because of the reasons above – we wanted a single player game, since RoR was a multiplayer one. Q: First of all, congratulations!! I really loved the game since came out, I bought it for my birthday, since risk of rain made me fell in love with all the pixel art in it, deadbolt didn’t disappointed me!! Everything in it I love it! Thanks for the game!! Now the question You already answered about how the skeletons or vampires came to be in that Place, how the vampires are killed by their lovers, but, how a reaper, becomes to be a reaper? I mean a candle said “I’ve never been so close to one” A: Originally, the reapers were actually supposed to be from suicides – if I remember right, the reaper when going down the stairs to the docks still has the hole in the back of his head in his sprite. Currently, it’s not explored how a reaper is made – I think a bit of mystery is always needed in making a believable universe J Q: Lorewise how many reapers are there total? Why are they incredibly fragile compared to the undead? What makes the reapers not undead? A: IIRC there were 4 fireplaces in the final stage, which was supposed to represent the way the fireplace was communicating to all reapers in the field. Q: Do you like turtles? How about corgis? A: Yes, and yes (although there’s way too many in Seattle now). Q: Did you have any idea Chris would break out a whole band’s worth of musicians for the soundtrack? His work was superb and the OST remains my absolute favorite to this day. A: DEADBOLT OST was actually done with many people – it must be in the credits somewhere! If I remember right, there is at least a drummer and a musician.

Thanks for all the questions, and happy hunting :)

hopoo