#the second is that that's not aria either

[void-kissed]

..So I had an idea for a crossover of sorts

[widevibratobitch]

me when theyre playing mozart ensembles too slow

[aria0fgold]

Looking at my prepared dialogues of my 5 ocs for that oc dialogue meme and I immediately notice... the lengths... Alec and Ray have longer dialogues, honestly this is-- this is not intentional it just also happens that I realized 3 of 5 of those ocs are actually SO QUIET with those two being the most talkative ones and this is how I realize that like... I honestly didn't notice at all...

[inkskinned]

at some point it's just like. do they even fucking like the thing they're asking AI to make? "oh we'll just use AI for all the scripts" "we'll just use AI for art" "no worries AI can write this book" "oh, AI could easily design this"

like... it's so clear they've never stood in the middle of an art museum and felt like crying, looking at a piece that somehow cuts into your marrow even though the artist and you are separated by space and time. they've never looked at a poem - once, twice, three times - just because the words feel like a fired gun, something too-close, clanging behind your eyes. they've never gotten to the end of the movie and had to arrive, blinking, back into their body, laughing a little because they were holding their breath without realizing.

"oh AI can mimic style" "AI can mimic emotion" "AI can mimic you and your job is almost gone, kid."

... how do i explain to you - you can make AI that does a perfect job of imitating me. you could disseminate it through the entire world and make so much money, using my works and my ideas and my everything.

and i'd still keep writing.

i don't know there's a word for it. in high school, we become aware that the way we feel about our artform is a cliche - it's like breathing. over and over, artists all feel the same thing. "i write because i need to" and "my music is how i speak" and "i make art because it's either that or i stop existing." it is such a common experience, the violence and immediacy we mean behind it is like breathing to me - comes out like a useless understatement. it's a cliche because we all feel it, not because the experience isn't actually persistent. so many of us have this ... fluttering urgency behind our ribs.

i'm not doing it for the money. for a star on the ground in some city i've never visited. i am doing it because when i was seven i started taking notebooks with me on walks. i am doing it because in second grade i wrote a poem and stood up in front of my whole class to read it out while i shook with nerves. i am doing it because i spent high school scribbling all my feelings down. i am doing it for the 16 year old me and the 18 year old me and the today-me, how we can never put the pen down. you can take me down to a subatomic layer, eviscerate me - and never find the source of it; it is of me. when i was 19 i named this blog inkskinned because i was dramatic and lonely and it felt like the only thing that was actually permanently-true about me was that this is what is inside of me, that the words come up over everything, coat everything, bloom their little twilight arias into every nook and corner and alley

"we're gonna replace you". that is okay. you think that i am writing to fill a space. that someone said JOB OPENING: Writer Needed, and i wrote to answer. you think one raindrop replaces another, and i think they're both just falling. you think art has a place, that is simply arrives on walls when it is needed, that is only ever on demand, perfect, easily requested. you see "audience spending" and "marketability" and "multi-line merch opportunity"

and i see a kid drowning. i am writing to make her a boat. i am writing because what used to be a river raft has long become a fully-rigged ship. i am writing because you can fucking rip this out of my cold dead clammy hands and i will still come back as a ghost and i will still be penning poems about it.

it isn't even love. the word we use the most i think is "passion". devotion, obsession, necessity. my favorite little fact about the magic of artists - "abracadabra" means i create as i speak. we make because it sluices out of us. because we look down and our hands are somehow already busy. because it was the first thing we knew and it is our backbone and heartbreak and everything. because we have given up well-paying jobs and a "real life" and the approval of our parents. we create because - the cliche again. it's like breathing. we create because we must.

you create because you're greedy.

[retroaria]

MORE NAGI NSFW FANFICS PLEASEEE

✮ “wanna stay the night?” ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ🧸ྀི

• | nagi x fem!reader smut | all characters aged up 18+ | •

summary: besties to lovers?? nagi and you are a little too close to be just friends, and this dynamic isn’t getting either of you what you actually want…

authors note: I made a little backstory, this is loooong so strap in. very vanilla and simple, nothing too freaky.

• | BLUE LOCK M.LIST | enjoy 🩶 - aria | •

Nagi decided very early on that he liked you. He wasn’t one to deny himself the acceptance of his own feelings, so he surrendered at the slightest semblance of them. Feeling and acting are very different tasks for him, one was relieving and the other was a hassle. So he had no real intentions of ever expressing these feelings to you verbally. You found yourself in a similar situation. The two of you, blatantly in love, yet choosing to remain within the unspoken intimacy of your friendship.

Countless nights spent tangled in bed together, gentle touches and soft words. As it became more frequent, your bodies became more comfortable. Soon there were kisses planted to each other’s skin, his lips sometimes quivering over yours, but never committing to the act. He was unafraid to be handsy with you, he’s felt you from head to toe. These moments felt clandestine to you, though you can’t imagine he felt the same considering his unashamed willingness.

Nagi feels there’s no need to tell you how he feels anymore, surely you already know. He tells you he loves you every time you’re together. When he traces his name into your skin with his fingertips, or when he lets his lips linger on your skin a few extra seconds. Sometimes, he cups your face in his hands and looks you in the eyes, hoping you’ll read him to filth and hug him a little tighter to let him know you understand. Nagi is under the impression you already know how he feels, and you’ve yet to reject his embrace, so you must feel the same. As far as he’s concerned, you’re just taking it slow.

He called you over to his apartment with the intentions of taking the next step. “Wanna stay the night?”

Nagi spun around in his chair, his legs crossed criss-cross applesauce and his hands clenched around his ankles. He tilts his head at you as he awaits your response, his hair falling loosely to the side. “effortlessly adorable as always” you thought to yourself.

“Don’t look at me like that Sei, you know I have work in the morning and-”, you were cut off by an obnoxious groan.

You gawked at his interruption, an expression that he promptly ignored. He pulled his headset off and threw himself beside you on the bed. You already knew where this was going. His arms were reaching out to tug you down into his embrace, and once that happened there would be no escape. As soon as you picked up on his movements you shifted to get out of the bed, but before you could you were down for the count. Your waist was pulled back down, the rest of your body surrendered. Your efforts to push away from him could barely be considered efforts as he pulled you into him. His arms hugged your waist loosely and his legs wrapped around yours in an almost fetal position. Nagi’s sluggish stature always put you off guard to the sheer capacity of his strength, but you can feel it now as he holds you in place against him.

“I’m serious, Nagi…” your words came out with a sigh. Your pleads went in one ear and out the other. The only thing he was listening to was the gentle release of every breath you let out.

“So am I…and don’t call me that.” he huffed at you. His lips began to part as he nuzzled into the crook of your neck, his warm breaths heating your skin and melting down your defense.

He planted a chaste kiss to your jaw and trailed it down to your collar bone. His hands on your back found their way to the hem of your shirt, pushing underneath it and smoothing upwards against your skin. He was trying to lull you into the comfort he provided, hoping that you’ll ease into him and stop whining. He pulled his lips away from your neck and moved his head up to meet your gaze, giving you that same telling look he always did. “Come on, I know you wanna cuddle.”

“If I stay I might wake up late tomorrow. I’d have to be up early if I want enough time to head back to my place and get ready before-“ he had cut you off for the second time that night, far more obnoxiously than before, with his lips molding against yours.

Your body froze at the contact, though it didn’t feel foreign, just alarming. His body against yours felt like hot lava, and the strength of his hold weighted you more than before. You instinctively pushed him away, something you had never done to him before. “S-sei, what are you doing?”

“What do you mean? Are you okay?” he said with genuine concern, which shocked you even more than his unexpected kiss.

“Why did you kiss me?” you asked, darting your eyes back and forth between his, as if to say, “what the fuck?”.

“Because I wanted to.” he cooed at you, still seemingly oblivious to why you’re suddenly so frantic.

“Friends don’t kiss each other like that Sei…”

“But I kiss you all the time.” he let his head fall limp against the pillow, looking up at you with weary eyes.

“I know but…that’s different. We aren’t dating Sei.”

“I guess not, but we still act how we do with each other anyways so…” he trailed off, his eye contact with you unwavering. He’s right, the weight of his words hitting hard in this position, the two of you gazing at each other longingly. Nagi is the first to break eye contact, eyes shooting down to your neck as he sighed, “I thought you knew…”

You didn’t need him to explain what he meant. You, of course, were in fact aware of Nagi’s feelings for you. With you, Nagi was clingy, vulnerable, honest, and despite his sluggish nature, he was attentive, gentle, and doting. There were parts of him he reserved especially for you, and it didn’t go unnoticed. You could wisp away the thought with an excuse, “I’m his best friend, of course he treats me differently…” - but that couldn’t explain the way he’d beg you over the phone to come and hold him while he sleeps, or the way he’d trail kisses down your neck as he thanked you for coming over.

Memories began to bubble up. The love that Nagi Seishiro devoted to you was always there - apparent and unapologetic.

“No…I knew. I just didn’t think you wanted anything more.” you broke the silence that lingered in the small gap between you two.

“Of course I want something more, I want you.” the last few words came out like a cry. Has he always spoken to you so tenderly? Yes, of course he has. When you searched for his eyes once more you found that they were already beating into yours. His face was dusted lightly red and his bottom lip was tugged gentle between his teeth. His eyes glistened with a feverish glaze over them, one that almost gave you goosebumps.

He said he wants you, and it’s the neediest you’ve ever seen him. His hands graze down your back and land on your hips once again to pull you impossibly closer. He didn’t feel like waiting for you to respond, actually, he’d prefer if you both did less talking and more kissing. It’s been mere minutes since the first time he felt your lips against his and he’s already craving another hit. He swiftly brings a hand up to cup your face and pull you down, crashing your lips into his.

You could’ve pulled back, but you didn’t. Instead you followed his pace, moving your lips against his. The kiss was lazy, sloppy even, but it was possibly the most passionate kiss you’ve ever had. He shifted himself to hover over you, holding himself up with his hands all without parting his mouth from yours once. His hands began to roam your body as they did before, sliding under your shirt and tracing sweetly up and down your sides. This time around, he was teetering at the bottom band of your bra, and when his hands moved down, he did the same at the hem of your jeans.

“Can I touch you?” he said, breathless as he pulled away from the kiss. “Everywhere I mean, can I take this off?” his hand tugging at your shirt. Though he always kept it somewhat appropriate in the past, Nagi was no stranger to your body and skin - like valleys and plains that he’s already explored, each time as soft and warm as it was last. He felt it was only right to ask, considering how you reacted to his kiss. The gentleness of his touch masked his excitement. His boyish nature couldn’t be stopped, a smile tugging at his lips knowing he was about to touch some boobs, - it was stupid, he thought, and so unbelievably cringe he couldn’t bear to let you see it on his face.

“Yes, of course.” you leaned forward and helped him remove your shirt. He quickly discarded his as well before leaning back down to kiss you again. You planted your hands flat on his chest and pushed him away gently, making him whine into the kiss as it ended. “Wait, are we actually doing this? We got here kinda fast.”

“We don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to, but you already know this is what I want.” his head found its way back into the crook of your neck as he spoke, ending his statement with a gentle kiss below your ear. It was alarming how quick the situation escalated, just minutes ago you were planning to head out and now you’re laying shirtless beneath your best friend. You try to take a moment to seriously consider your decision despite the intensity of the situation. Your vision stayed locked on your palms gripping gently to Nagi’s chest. Still in contemplation, you let your eyes trail back up to lock with his - dull and sheen with a glint of desire you didn’t know he was capable of mustering up at all.

Of course you wanted this, you were already worked up from him being all over you and could feel a sticky pool of arousal bleeding through your panties. But did you need this? What would the morning look like? Would you leave before dawn and head to work that day, your relationship with Nagi remaining in its undeveloped state? It had been only moments since he offered you the out, yet all these thought ran rampant through your mind, unable to find a satisfactory solution. He must’ve noticed your look of uncertainty, as he slowly began to peel his skin away from you

The detachment set you off. All your concerncs still unresolved, yet you had your answer. You all but lunged yourself forward after him, hands cupping his face and dragging him back down to the sheets with you. His hands caught your back just before you hit the bed. He fumbled with the latches of your bra, but figured it out rather quick - discarding it to the floor and laying you down gently on the mattress.

As he leaned closer to you, his lips met yours again. They trailed down to your neck, then he nibbled gently on the skin of your collarbone. His kisses continued down your chest, diverting the linear path to drag his tongue over one of your breasts and suck your nipple into his mouth - free hand holding the other, grouping it gently. He kept at this for a while, a thin string of saliva connecting his lips to your skin each time he pulled away.

After trailing his open mouthed kisses down to your lower tummy, he worked hastily on removing your jeans. Discarding of them, then smoothing his hands over your skin from your ankles to your thighs - gripping roughly at your plush skin.

It was strange, you weren’t a virgin, but Nagi sure made you feel like one right now. All of his touches and movements so smooth and quick. You were sure he didn’t have as much sexual experience as you did either, so his cool demeanor traveling over to a situation like this was a bit shocking. Later, you would bring this up to him,

“I was just really focused.”

“On what?”

“On fucking you, did you forget already?”

as insouciant as ever, the only thing throwing off his deadpan expression was the slight furrowed brow he shot at you.

His decision to keep your panties on proved to be fully self indulgent. After tossing your jeans to the floor, he was quick to lunge between your thighs, placing kisses to the wet fabric covering your heat - pressing his tongue over where your clit would be. Every twitch and gasp from you egging him on even further - for someone moving with such haste just moments ago, he was having way too much fun teasing you.

After he had his fill of that, he got off the bed to take his pants off - which he did a little awkwardly, stumbling a bit as he moved too quick to return to you. A sudden surge of joy warmed your heart at the sight, his clumsiness cutting through any tension. This was comfortable - you met his gaze above you and giggled. “This is exciting.” you said, and his eyes lit up.

“Yeah…you’re so beautiful…” he muttered as he gawked at your body beneath him. His fingers tracing over the hem of your panties , as if deciding whether or not he should remove them yet. He let his cock slide up against them. As his tip fluttered over your clothed clit, you looked down and made eye contact with it.

Nagi was big, in terms of length and girth. It didn’t look big enough to hurt, but definitely the biggest you’ve seen thus far. As he watched your eyes trace his length a smirk crept over his face, but he was quick to shut it down. He finally pulled your panties down your legs, both of you moaning in sync as his cock laid against your bare folds. Unlike the rest of your clothes, he left your panties on the bed beside you, which he would later slip under his pillow hoping you wouldn’t notice. He’d pretend to help you look for them in the morning, but you’d both give up since you had to get to work; sneaky.

He relished in the feeling of your warmth against him for a few more moments. Then, he leaned down and planted a chaste kiss to your swollen lips, then another, and another; pecking you like a little bird. His cock grinding up and down your folds, tip nudging your bundle of nerves in a soft and swift motion, causing your hips to lightly buck up into him. A moan escaped your lips between his kisses and he swallowed it whole. Slotting his lips with yours and pushing his tongue into your mouth, speeding up his thrusts.

Nagi’s thrusts were lazy, but not so much that they were sloppy. His hips rocked into yours with a soothing rhythm and a gentle pace. He let most of his weight lay on top of you as his moans of your name and other profanities poured into your ear. Without any notice, he pulled his hips back and lined his tip with your entrance - taking a sharp breath in before sliding between your slick walls and breathing out in a low groan.

“Ah~ fuck…you feel so good” he whimpered out as he begins rocking into you at a steady pace, still languid, yet striking. Once he found his rhythm, he gripped underneath your thighs and pulled your legs up to wrap around his waist. He towered slightly above you now. His hair hung low with his head down, covering his eyes - though you knew he was watching the way your cunt sucked him in with every thrust, probably ogling at it with glassy eyes and drool threatening to spill from the corners of his mouth.

You had been so focused on Nagi this entire time: his movements, his facial expressions, where his eyes wander too. As soon as his cock made way inside you, the only thing you could think about was his tip placing rough kisses to your cervix every second - which made it hard to do anything but slack your jaw and roll your eyes into the back of your head.

Nagi averted his gaze from the mess he was making of your cunt only to watch your face contort in pure pleasure - pleasure that he was giving to you. Your lips were swollen, but slightly drying from the way your mouth hangs open. Every noise that comes up your throat sounds off straight at him, each time making him pick up his pace. The faster his thrusts the more disheveled he got. The longer he’s spent inside you the needier he’s gotten to chase his own orgasm.

He lets himself lay on top of you again, hiding his face in your neck. The sounds Nagi made were purely shameless and every so often he’d heat up your ear with strings of praise, “God~ so good for me, so fucking good for me baby”. At this point, his thrusts were actually starting to get sloppy. He was rutting into you like a horny dog, one hand gripping your waist and the other tugging at his bed sheets. His eyes were squeezed shut and his bottom lip was tugged between his teeth in a pointless attempt to quiet himself down. “Ha~ ah, s-shit i’m gonna cum”.

After a few more thrusts he pulled his hips back and let his cock slide out on your tummy. Seeing as he was already on the verge of collapsing, you decided to help him out - reaching down between the two of you and stroking his length until sticky white ropes shot out painting your stomach and chest.

“Fuck…I’m sorry…” he heaved out between heavy breaths.

“Don’t be, it’s ok.” you said sweetly, hand still rubbing over his cock. You were a bit disappointed, but still happy with the experience nonetheless. Before you could say anything Nagi sat up and pulled your legs apart further, scooting himself a bit down the bed before diving between your thighs. He kissed them up and down, biting gently at your skin - you gasped at the sensation and he moaned against you.

“Gonna make you cum, m’kay babe?” he looked up at you, lust still lingering in his grey eyes. You nodded eagerly at his gesture and he smiled up at you, not a smirk, but a heart warming smile - he looked totally blissed out, hair sticking to his sweaty face and pupils blown. That sweet moment of you two looking at each other didn’t last long. He put his hands on your hips and pulled you closer to him, then began trailing kisses from your tummy down to your folds just over your clit. He reached underneath your thighs and pulled them up to get in a better position before wrapping his arms around them and gripping your waist - you’re lower half totally locked in his arms.

Once he had you where he wanted you, he immediately prodded his tongue into cunt, lapping up your arousal. He dragged it up your folds until he reached your clit again - wrapping his lips around the area and sucking gently as he kitten licked the bundle of nerves teasingly. You let your hands roam down to his hair, gripping it roughly as he sped up his tongue drawing circles around your clit. This garnered you a deep groan from him which reverberated through your pelvis, causing you to jolt up into his face.

He eats your pussy like it was the last thing he’d ever do, pushing your thighs together and squeezing them around his head. The combined feeling of your thighs clenching him down into you and your fingers tugging his white locks was enough to get him hard again. He rutted his hips into the mattress as he flicked his tongue over your clit in a tantalizing and fast rhythm. Your hips were bucking up into him, moans and whimpers spilling out. His entire head was completely engulfed in your hold and he was on cloud nine.

Fueled by your reactions and the wetness from your cunt that filled his sense and smothered all over his face, he unlatched his hand from your waist and sunk two fingers into your leaking hole. Those slender fingers curled up into your cunt as if to beacon you closer, your hips moving further into him against your will. He pumped them in and out of you with an unrelenting vigor. The sounds coming from below your waist were wet and filthy.

It didn’t take long for your orgasm to wash over you like it was the first one you’d ever had. Something about cumming in front of Nagi, cumming because of Nagi, felt unbearably surreal - but you can’t deny how it egged you on. He continued all his motions well past your point of climax, the only thing stopping him was your thighs squeezing harder than before and your hands pushing him away from you. After lapping at your cum soaked cunt a few more times, he placed a tender kiss to your clit and pushed himself up to level with you. He immediately dragged you in for a kiss, letting you taste yourself on his tongue - his lips and chin still wet with your arousal.

“We don’t have to talk about anything yet, we can just shower and go to sleep if you want…just want you to stay here with me…is that ok?” your gentle kiss was broken every few seconds as he spoke into it a bit nervously. He had leaned over to the side of you at this point, his body still pressed against you and his hands cupping your face closer to his. He asked for reassurance with lidded eyes slowly tracing all your features.

“Yeah…ok, that works.” you smiled at him softly and bumped your nose against his to ensure he understood you were comfortable and happy. The whole ordeal hadn’t yet hit you, and Nagi offered you an out to prolong that until the morning. Remaining in his warmth without worry felt like a good way to spend the rest of the night. He kissed you again, deeper this time.

“I love you.”

“I love you too, Sei.”

hey guys it’s aria isn’t that crazy i’m literally alive and not dead!!!! sorry not sorry for the mini hiatus, im working full time again and making bread which is fucking awesome :D trying to get myself a new car soon so I’ve really been on the grind. Being able to go to my drafts and update this throughout the week has been nice, low commitment and fun in between the other motions of my life. I LOVE WRITING YIPPIE!!!

[grandlinedreams]

|| notes: waves hand i woke up thinking abt this so uhhh enjoy Az being a menace [AS!reader masterlist]

|| warnings: pwp, mention of Aria, Az is whipped and we love it, oral (f receiving), soft sex, reader and Az are just gooey and in love

Azriel is not a morning person by choice.

Given his propensity for liking to be awake in the darker, more solitary hours of the night, it makes sense that he'd prefer to spend early morning still asleep. And he does when he can, when there aren't pressing matters to attend to ㅡ or he did, until his daughter was born.

Azriel loves Aria, truly. The little girl has him wrapped around her tiny finger ㅡ but he can't deny that he'd jumped at the offer Feyre and Rhys had extended of a 'cousin sleepover', snapping up the opportunity for Aria to get to play with Nyx, and for the two of you to get a tiny break from parenthood.

(He'd missed Aria the second she was gone, and the ache that rolled down your end of the bond said you shared the sentiment.)

So when he still wakes to the soft glow of early morning sunrise without the pounce of a small half-Illyrian girl on his body, Azriel groans and reaches for you, snuggling you closer to him.

Either still asleep yourself or half-way between that and consciousness, the way you press against him in answer still makes his heart skip a beat as he silently admires you. Your hair spills over the top of one delicate pointed ear, the rest pooled against the gentle slope of your neck.

There are a handful of marks over the column of your neck, bruises bloomed strawberry pink under the attention of his teeth the night before ㅡ and the memory of the sounds you'd made, both then and underneath his body, makes Azriel's breath catch and his eyes darken.

You have the entire morning to enjoy each other's company, to revel in time that isn't spoken for by both the duty of Night Court and parenthood ㅡ and it's that thought that has Azriel pressing his lips to your neck with intent.

He starts out gentle. Your skin is soft and warm under his touch, but it doesn't take much to fully rouse you out of sleep as a hand finds his hair, followed by a sleepy sigh. "Good morning."

"Morning," he murmurs, pausing his ministrations to look at you properly. "Did you sleep well?"

You nod. "Very," you answer, hand sliding from his hair to cup his cheek, expression softening as he leans into it. "Did you?"

Azriel hums, leaning to press a kiss to youe forehead, then your temple, soft kisses peppered down the curve of your jaw. You let him until he catches a flicker of impatience from you, hard pressed to keep from grinning when you guide him to your mouth for a proper kiss.

It's slow and sweet for the early hour, though it dips into something needier as Azriel deepens it, muffling your soft sound as he moves to cage you underneath him. Your neck tilts to offer him more room when he turns his attention back to the marks he'd left, airy gasp leaving your lips as he nips at your pulsepoint.

He leaves a handful of fresh marks in his wake along your throat and collarbone, and the one he leaves at the top of your breast gets him the curl of your fingers into his hair, making him groan when you tug.

Azriel's not sure he'll ever get enough of the sounds you make, delighting in the choked moan from you as you arch into the warmth of his mouth over your breast.

He leaves both nipples peaked and aching, lips grazing over your ribs to your navel. The hitch of your breath when he stops at your hip makes him smirk.

"You're a menace today," you tell him, but you're far from angry as he nudges your legs apart ans presses kisses to both of your thighs. "What's got you so worked up?"

"You," Azriel answers, savoring your gasp and twitch of your hips when he offers a slow roll of his tongue against your slick folds. His hands are steady against the tremble of your muscles as he gives you his attention in earnest, following every involuntary movement of your body.

His name is a sweet cry on your lips when he digs the tip of his tongue against your clit, hand in his hair tightening as he lets you buck against his face. "Fuck," you whine, and the desperation in your tone makes his length twitch in response.

Your other hand fists into the bedsheets, white-knuckled as you writhe, chest heaving as your mate works you steadily towards your orgasm. The work of his tongue against your slick, aching core is nothing short of sinful, making your eyes roll as searing pleasure mounts in your lower belly.

The tug on his hair and stuttering of your hips against his mouth are the only warnings Azriel gets before you're coming, noises pitching higher as he works you through your orgasm.

Azriel only lets up when you've stopped twitching, soft whimper tumbling from your lips as he kisses his way back up your body. The taste of yourself on his tongue when he kisses you makes you moan, hooking a leg around his hip as your own buck in silent demand.

Azriel enters you slowly, eyes shut tight against the white-hot pleasure that licks up his spine at the way you clench around him. Whether it be for the early hour or simply because he wants to make this last, Azriel's hips rock against yours in a steady, languid pace, intentional in how he sinks as deep into you as he can before sliding back.

Your hands wander over him, eager to touch what you can reach with both your hands and mouth. He shudders when you suck a mark into his own neck, skin sweat-slick beneath your lips. Your fingers curl against his shoulders, mindful to skirt the jut of his wings from his back as you drag them down.

Azriel chokes when your fingertips graze where his wings meet his back and even though you're gentle, the sensitivity of the skin along with the molten warmth of your walls around his length has him snapping his hips against yours roughly a handful of times before he's spilling into you with a low groan.

You aren't far behind, arching into him as you clench around him, milking him for all he has to offer before you go boneless, pressed into the bed by Azriel's weight over you.

The next few minutes are spent in a symphony of soft panting brfore you can find coherency to speak. "Well," you huff, "that's one way to wake up."

Azriel grins against your neck and then lifts his head to look at you. "Are you complaining?"

You snort, but your tone is soft and affectionate as you press a kiss to his forehead. "No, definitely not."

[thatonebirdwrites]

L-Corp and chilled scotch

The scotch pours into her cup, the chill saturates through the glass, and the temptation to just throw the glass and drink directly from the bottle taunts her yet again. She resists.

Unlike her ability to resist Kara.

Kara Danvers or rather Supergirl, the hero that is the beloved of National City.

And a habitual liar.

She throws back the scotch, the cool temperature a balm across the burn of the alcohol. Hope sits on her desk, a swirling cubical sculpture, that offers up yet another simulation for Lena to attempt.

Or would have.

The doors swing open with a bang, and Samantha Arias stands there, an expression of fury on her usually smug or gentle expressions.

"Lena Kieran Luthor," she snaps. "I am sick of you dodging my phone calls."

"Oh?" She pours herself another drink and wishes she'd told Jess to not allow anyone into her office. She'd forgotten Sam had full access to her still.

"Normally I'd just roll with it." Sam slams the doors shut, marches over and plucks the glass right out of Lena's hands. "But to ghost Ruby? Your goddaughter?"

So that's the source of Sam's fury. Lena crosses her arms over her chest.

"Now that I won't allow. Ruby adores you, Lena, and you do not get to ice her out like this."

"It's better for her," Lena starts to say, but Sam does the unthinkable. She dumps the scotch into the garbage. "Hey! That's damn good scotch you're wasting!"

"I don't want to have this talk if you're drunk." Sam sighs and presses flips her hair over her shoulder. "I think it's time Ruby and I returned to National CIty, Lena."

"No, you're will not." Lena scowls. "You have Metropolis."

"And what good is that if my best friend is currently ghosting her goddaughter, drinking her life away, and apparently mismanaging L-Corp's funds?" Sam stabs her finger at Lena's chest. "Don't think I haven't noticed that either. What the hell has you this worked up? Is it Kara?"

Lena attempts to school her face in time but the shock of Sam's very accurate guess slips out for a brief second. Long enough for Sam to catch it.

"It is Kara." The fury that Sam rode in with switches to concern. "Lena, whatever happened? You don't have to face it alone. I'm here for you. I'll always be here for you."

"You don't know what I've done, Sam," Lena says flatly. She doesn't want Sam's pity. "Would you want a murderer interacting with Ruby?"

Sam flips her hair over her shoulder again and does a rather dashing pose that reminds Lena far too much of Reign. "Guess whose body murdered dozens and destabilized Earth's climate? Yup, that's me!"

"It wasn't really you," Lena protests.

"Does it matter?" Sam gestures to the sofa, and when Lena doesn't move, she, far more gently than Lena deserves, pushes her down and settles next to her. "Reign, in my body, tried to kill Ruby. There are times Ruby looks at me, and I see fear in her eyes. That's not something we can just erase from her memory, Lena. My hands are coated in blood regardless of who did it. I must live with that, so whatever you've done? It can't be worse than that."

"I killed my brother, Sam," Lena blurts out, and is appalled at herself. She's never said it out loud like this before. Not since she shot Lex, saw his proof of Kara Danvers = Supergirl, and then lit the whole bunker on fire, sealing it forever in concrete and metal with the DNA lock. "Took my pistol, and shot him right in the chest. My own brother. And I did it thinking I was saving Kara, saving the world. But I was a fool." She looks away and reaches for the scotch.

Sam puts it out of her reach and grasps her hands instead. "You're not a fool," she says, softly. "You did what you thought was right."

"Right," Lena sneers. "What even is rightness? Do you know what it feels like to hold the pistol in your hands, Sam? To feel its heft? To smell the gunpowder, hear the bang, the gush of blood? What of that metallic smell? The acidic smoke of a body burning?"

Sam continues to hold her hands, her thumb rubbing back and forth, but she says nothing. Only tilts her head, listening.

It infuriates Lena, but she doesn't want Sam to let go. She feels unmoored, her entire body vibrating with a vicious energy, where she wants those that hurt her to bleed. But Kara can't bleed. She stronger than goddamn steel. No, she can only rip Kara apart, so that Kara has nothing. Just like Kara's damn secret did to Lena's heart.

"As he coughs up blood," she uses the most descriptive language she can in hopes it'll convince Sam to give up on her, "he dragged himself to his computer, turned on the TVs, and showed me exactly who Kara Danvers is. Lex with his dying breaths, his blood filled lungs, said I've been a goddamn fool. Unable to see what was right in front of my eyes." The tears sting her eyes, and that makes her even more angry.

Still Sam doesn't say anything.

"Say something, Sam!" Lena snaps. "Tell me that I'm a monster! A murderer. A villain! It's apparently what Kara thinks. She lied to me again and again, and this whole time she was Supergirl. Probably keeping me, the Luthor, close to make sure I stay in line. So let's be honest, let's lay it all out, don't we? I'm a villain. My family are villains, that's all I'll ever be."

Sam sighs. "No, Lena. No you were never the villain. You've always been the hero. I wouldn't be here if not for you. Ruby wouldn't be here. None of us would. You've saved so many a thousand times over." Her words rain onto Lena's desiccated heart, and the tears threaten to overflow. "And no you are not like your family. I don't know what Kara's deal is. Why she kept that truth from you, but I do know you. And you can't and won't ever be a villain."

"I killed my own brother, Sam," Lena argues.

"Yes, you told me. That doesn't make you a villain." Sam leans closer, her brown eyes intense. "I know that can change a person. Taking a life like that? It's not easy to bear. It sucks, I know."

"You don't even remember what Reign did," Lena says, irritated.

"I do actually. Not all of it, but..." The haunted look in Sam's eye floods Lena with guilt and a hint of disbelief. "When you were working to find the cure in your lab, before Supergirl barged in on us, I -- I started to recall bits and pieces. Then you somehow got both of us in that other dimension. Reign tried very hard to convince me to let go and embrace her. She pushed the memories on me. The crunch of bones in my hands, the nauseating metallic scent, the lifeless eyes still wide with fear. That -- that doesn't leave me."

"Oh." Lena's anger slowly fades into a confusing mire of bitterness and worry. "You didn't mention it."

"How could I?" Sam blinked away her own tears and gave Lena a pained smile. "I was panicking. I remember how you held me. How you reassured me that you would find a cure. You gave me hope that I wouldn't be just an alien weapon. So no, Lena, no matter what you've done, you can't be a villain. You saved me and the world, and I'm not going to let you forget it."

Lena looks down at their hands. She still hasn't pulled away from Sam's gentle touch. "Even if I'm plotting revenge? To make Kara hurt like she hurt me?"

"Even then."

"Revenge is for villains," Lena protests. Sam gives her a look that spells out how she definitely doesn't agree. Frustrated, Lena pushes forward. "Look, I've even dragged Andrea into my plot--"

"The one who viciously betrayed you?" Sam's eyebrows rose.

"The one and same. Gave her Catco." Lena couldn't hide her bitterness from her voice. "I bought it for Kara anyway. Might as well give it to someone who isn't qualified to lead it. Let it tank. Let Kara feel the pain of it. Then I'll unveil her true identity at her damn award ceremony, so the whole world can see her lies."

"Okay." Sam wraps an arm around Lena's shoulders. "So when is this ceremony?"

Lena blinks at Sam, surprised. "You're not going to talk me out of this?"

"I know you, Lena. And I know your heart. When the moment comes, you'll do the right thing. You always do." Sam smiles and the warmth of her arm melts some of the chill that had coated Lena's heart since her brother's death.

"So you're helping me." Lena isn't quite sure what to make of this development.

"I said I got your back, and I meant it."

That fractures Lena just enough that the tears escape. Sam draws her into a hug, and for the first time in weeks since her brother's death, Lena weeps.

***

The Pulitzer ceremony happens in the Art Museum downtown, their theatrical stage converted into a cocktail party. The dishes mostly variations of either French cuisine or potstickers. Thanks to Sam's assistance, Lena wove herself into the planning committee and convinced them to let her give the speech and the award to Kara herself.

Far too easy. At least for the planning portion. Andrea showed up several times to try to convince Lena to give away the surprise sooner, but Lena's firm handling of Andrea shut that down. She'd sent Andrea to Sam for an exclusive interview.

Sam, who would soon become the next CEO of the entirety of L-corp, while Lena stepped down into a pure research consultation position.

That had been Sam's idea, mostly to fix the hemorrhaging of funds issue, so Lena didn't end up investigated by the FBI. Last thing she needed right now, so instead, she'll use her private wealth and L-Corps science grants to fund her projects.

Today, she stands on the balcony, her fingers tapping through the evidence she'd found on the last of Lex's servers. The rest of his servers she'd hacked and deleted until all that was left was what she had stored in this particular tablet.

The rest of her plan involved a carefully written speech about honesty and truth, so when the news breaks, the juxaposition of her words against the truth of Kara's lies will surely destroy her like Kara's lie had destroyed Lena.

She'd practiced her speech in front of Sam and Ruby, though Ruby still had no idea why Lena was so bitter toward Kara. Sam didn't convince her to alter any parts of it, though she did ask one question that haunted Lena still:

"Is this your truth or a half-lie for Kara's sake?"

Lena had scoffed and said the latter, but Sam tilted her head as if not believing her. All her years of Luthor upbringing could not fool Sam, who somehow pierced through to her real feelings with just one look.

Now she overlooks the guests who mill about the extravagantly decorated room. The scent of savory food wafts up from below, the wine already heavy in her stomach. Kara keeps looking up at her from where she speaks with Alex and Kelly, and Lena does her best to ignore each glance.

Every time Kara looks away, Lena looks down at her and wonders. Was anything Kara shared real? Was it all an act? Those questions haunt her as much as Sam's, and she turns and walks into the backstage area.

To her dismay, Kara finds her there. Of all places for Kara to show up. Lena schools her features into delight for Kara as she speaks of how she plans to give the award speech.

Except Kara does the exact thing Lena assumed she'd never do.

She takes off her glasses. "I'm Supergirl!" Words tumble from Kara's mouth in an avalanche. "And I'm so, so sorry. I should have told you ages ago, but I loved being just Kara with you. And I was afraid to lose you, and I can't lose you. So I thought I could be just Kara with you, and I convinced myself I wouldn't lose you then.... but I've been a fool. So selfish. I've been lying to myself too. I thought I was protecting you, but I've been hurting you, haven't I? And I can't bear that. Gosh, Lena, I'm so sorry." Her tears smudging her makeup, and the repeated apology sear into Lena.

For once in her life, Lena has no idea what to say or think. Is this also an act?

"Please, Lena, say something," Kara begs.

And yet, Lena can't.

Kara apologized. Kara finally told her the truth.

What can she do with this? Surely it's not real. Just another ploy. Kara must know Lena knows. She must have slipped up somewhere, given away a clue.

And yet, the earnest grief in Kara's expression, the way she says "I just wanted to be Kara with you. Just Kara. I'm so sorry. I was wrong to lie to you all this time."

The way she begs Lena to speak, it all collides with Lena, and she feels breathless, on the verge of tears.

What does Kara even mean? To admit the wrongdoing? To admit she was being selfish?

Lex would never do such a thing. Lillian would scoff at the idea that she could be wrong.

So what does it mean for Kara to admit she was wrong? To admit she lied? To admit she had hung with Lena to play the role of human? The apology, the tears, the desperate longing in Kara's voice is unlike any apology Lena has ever heard.

She can't process it.

The host catches Lena's eye and taps his wrist. "It's almost time."

Lena takes the opportunity and steps around Kara. Her feet move for her, and she follows the host to the back of the stage, hidden by the red curtains. She hurriedly wipes the tears from her eyes, and touches up her make-up.

The truth in the tablet weighs heavy in her hands. She steps onto stage at her cue and places the tablet on the podium. The send button glares up at her, and her fingers hover over it.

The crowd lines up in rows in front of the stage. Kara stands next to Alex and Nia. Kelly, Brainy, and J'onn stand off to one side, and in the corner of the crowd, leaning against a pillar, Sam stands.

Kara's eyes are still red from her tears, her make-up fixed.

The speech rolls off Lena's tongue like sour candy. She's practiced it enough that the emotive moments come out as planned.

It's Sam's expression that cuts Lena far more than the rising hope in Kara's. Sam's expression burns with an intensity, as if she sees into Lena's soul, knows exactly her indecision.

Lena's finger hovers. One tap and the whole world will know the truth.

And yet her finger refuses to touch the screen.

Kelly glances between her and Kara, her brow furrowed. Does she know?

Alex knows definitely.

Does Brainy? He stands rigid slightly behind Nia, where the young reporter smiles up at Lena. Did they know?

J'onn has his arms crossed, and surely he knew.

Was any of her 'friends' real?

Beyond them, the crowd shifts and edges closer. Dozens of faces upturned to hear her speech, to hear her speak of the virtues of Kara, to listen to her extol on honesty and truth, and to lay that at Kara's feet.

As if Kara was truthful and honest. As if she truly deserved this award.

And yet, her heart betrays her. She drops her hand next to the tablet. Pauses to take a breath. This is it. She needs to do it now, but her hand doesn't hit send. Instead, she exits the program, picks up the award from its case, and steps out from behind the podium.

"And so I present to Kara, the Pulitzer Prize, for her truthful reporting of my brother's deadly actions, and for unveiling the reality of bigotry against alien communities." She stresses 'alien' and looks at Kara.

Kara, the one person who somehow broke through all her defenses, her stole away her heart faster than anyone prior. Even with Jack, the love had been a slow build, but with Kara? Lena had fallen for her in that first meeting in her office.

How could she not? Kara's warmth, how she'd admitted to understanding Lena's situation, an understanding Lena thought she'd never have beyond Jack and Sam.

Memories of their times together deluges Lena, and tears escape. She wants it all to be real so badly.

Kara steps forward, hope in her expression, and that tears Lena's heart even more.

With shaking hands she gives the award to Kara. In front of everyone, in front of the cameras, in front of the world watching this very moment, Kara grasps her arms instead.

"Lena," she says, her voice trembling, "Lena, thank you. I -- I couldn't do this without you. I can't do this without you."

The words leap from her lips, unplanned, unscripted. Her heart betraying her yet again. "You will always have me as a friend."

Kara sweeps her into a hug, presses a kiss to Lena's forehead, and she can't help but sink into the warmth.

She wants this to be real.

Oh god, she needs this to be real.

But the pain of the lie overshadows her, and she struggles against tears. Struggles to hold back her grief, her agony.

Her shattered heart cuts her to pieces, her body a betrayal, and yet she doesn't want to let go. Doesn't care who sees her. She wants this to be real.

She needs this to be real. She needs Kara.

And yet, Kara destroyed her. Destroyed her more than the gunshot to Lex's chest.

She pulls back, her body trembling, and she presses a kiss to Kara's cheek. Kara's sharp intake of breath slices deep, coils in Lena's belly. How can she resist Kara?

Why can't this be real?

The universe takes pity on her. An alien bursts into the room through a bubbling silver-blue portal. Energy arcs toward them, and Kara shifts them so it hits her back. They tumble in a heap to the ground, the wind knocked out of Lena's lungs. Her tablet goes skidding into the curtains. She gasps as pain briefly shoots up her back.

Kara sweeps Lena to her feet, and pushes her into the curtains. They stumble out of sight.

Kara rips off her glasses. Nanites ripples over clothes, and the supersuit -- pants edition -- blooms over her body. "I got this. Please, get to safety, Lena."

Alex and J'onn calmly give orders, while Kara -- as Supergirl -- bursts out from the curtains to tackle the other alien.

Lena snags her tablet and stumbles through the backstage, dazed. Her head spins from where she'd hit the floorboards. Her path takes her away from the clamor of fighting, and she tumbles into a side gallery. There a growing crowd, guided by Alex and several security guards, stream toward an exit sign.

Kelly reaches her side before Sam. "Are you all right?" Kelly looks her over with the practiced eye of a medic.

Lena nods, but when Sam wraps an arm around her as if sensing her unsteadiness. She lets herself lean against Sam. Lets her and Kelly guide her to safety. Behind her, the crashes shake the floor under them. The walls crack.

Alex orders the guards to continue evacuating, pauses only to kiss Kelly's cheek, and rushes into the other room.

This isn't real.

Whatever she has with Kara, it can't be real.

Kelly turns to her, and her question cuts through Lena's shock. "Where's Kara?"

Lena stares at Kelly.

"Wasn't she with you?" Kelly scans the crowd, worried.

Kelly doesn't know. The truth takes the breath from Lena's lungs. Kelly doesn't know.

Lena isn't the last after all.

Sam puts a hand on Kelly's shoulder. "I'm sure Alex reached her."

Kelly shook her head. "How? She was guiding the others out."

Lena watches herself say, "Kara is safe. She ducked backstage." A lie that protects Kara and only leaves Kelly further in the dark.

"I'll send security her way then. She needs to get out safely." Kelly turns and snags a guard.

Lena watches Kelly say, "Can you look for Kara Danvers? Last seen backstage." Watches and says nothing.

Sam's hand grips her shoulder. "You kept her secret," she whispered.

Sam doesn't know what Lena did with the tablet. Lena looks down at the tablet still in her hand. She could still do it. Andrea waits for her transfer at Catco.

Instead, she slams the tablet against the wall. It cracks the screen. Again and again she shatters it. The pieces tumble to the ground, only stopping when Sam grasps her hand and pulls the wrecked tablet from her grip.

Numerous people have turned to stare at her, but a guard breaks the sudden stillness with a sharp command, "Move now!"

Another boom shakes the side room, and the panicked whispering, the urgent rush begins again.

Sam takes her arm and leads her to the exit.

Kelly follows, and they tumble out of the museum into daylight. The chorus of the city saturates Lena's senses, and the words from Sam and Kelly are drowned in the rumble of engines, calls of birds, panicked cries from the crowd, the yelling of fervent guards.

Lena sees only the look of hope in Kara's eyes. She closes her eyes, sways, and the moment overtakes her. She faints.

***

Sam and Kelly sit on the lip of the ambulance, while Lena endures the examination of a paramedic. She says nothing, doesn't explain her faint, only deals with the tests.

The IV fluids chill her veins, but she doesn't refuse like normal.

Why did she lie to Kelly? Why did she keep Kara's secret?

Andrea will be livid. She has nothing to give Andrea now. The only evidence lay on the destroyed tablet.

Why? She has no answer to her own question.

Someone speaks to her, but the words dance around her. It takes several long minutes before the words collapse into meaning in her brain.

"-- possible shock." The paramedic speaks.

"I know." Sam sounds tired and worried. "But she's very much against hospitals. I can take her to her private doctor for those tests."

"I'm a certified medic," Kelly adds. "I can handle it if she won't go in." She gently puts a hand on Lena's shoulder. "Unless you are all right with --"

"No." The word comes with great difficulty. "I do not need the hospital." She feels as if she watches someone else speak with her lips.

Sam takes control and tucks her into her car.

Kelly rides with them, and they head to Lena's private doctor. Despite her worry for Alex, Kelly stays with Lena. Speaks to her gently. Offers kind words of support. Briefly texts Alex, but Lena sees the text and it contains nothing about Lena's situation.

"Thank you." Lena shivers and wraps the blanket tighter around herself. It's white, the fabric scratchy, but its from the ambulance so she doesn't expect any better. "I --" Lena can't finish the sentence.

She feels caught in a loop.

Why couldn't she do it?

The plan had been flawless. Perfect.

And yet, here she was, keeping Kara's secret. She was now an accomplice, and this time it was Kelly she kept in the dark. Unless Kelly too was an actress. No, she can't let that continue, can she? Can she truly do this to another?

Wouldn't keeping the lie only hurt Kelly like it hurts Lena now? No, she can't do that to Kelly.

She waits until the blood tests are taken, until after her doctor looks her over and orders to take a few days of rest, until Kelly and Sam lead her into her penthouse.

As soon as the door shuts, she turns to Kelly and asks the fateful question. "Did you know Kara is Supergirl?"

Kelly blinks and stares at Lena. "What?"

"Did you know too? Did everyone now but me?" She wants to be angry. To draw forth the pain into a blade of fury, but her words come out broken.

She wanted Kara to bleed and yet she'd failed.

Kelly shakes her head. "Are we talking about Kara Danvers? Her?"

Sam sighs. "I'm making us tea. Rest means laying down, Lena." She points to the sofa.

Lena frowns but dutifully sits down.

Kelly stands in the entryway still. "Alex never said," she says, finally.

"Kara only told me today," Lena admits. For that is the truth. "Right before my speech."

"I see." Kelly meets Lena's gaze. "I had no idea. I'm sorry, Lena. Are you all right? To learn something that jarring about your girlfriend? I -- I know how painful that can be."

Girlfriend? Lena stares at Kelly. Girlfriend?

Kelly thinks Kara and her are dating?

Lena's thoughts screech to a halt. "No," she says and lays down. She rests her arm over her eyes, and shuts out everyone. Whatever Kelly or Sam say, she ignores. She refuses food, refuses everything, and curls up under the shitty blanket.

***

Two days huddled on the sofa, and Lena feels like a truck has driven over her back again and again. Her sofa is perhaps the worst thing in the universe for sleeping, but Lena hadn't felt like getting up.

Sam stayed. Ruby joins them, and between the two of them, they coax Lena into eating and drinking some juice.

Sadly, no scotch. Sam hid it.

At one point, Kara shows up, but Sam turns her away. Alex comes by next, and Sam turns her away too.

"Aunt Lena," Ruby sits next to her as they watch a documentary on the wall television. "Are you feeling sick still?"

Lena looks at the thirteen year old. Is that what Sam told Ruby? In a sense, she feels like death warmed over, even if it's not a physical illness. The anger that had fueled her plan had collapsed into a malaise so deep that Lena wishes she could just cease existing.

"Yes." It's the most she's spoken in two days.

"We can make your favorite soup again. I've gotten better at it. Mom's been teaching me." Ruby attempts a smile. "And I made you something. Maybe it'll help you feel better?" Ruby digs into her backpack, that sits at her feet, and pulls out a framed drawing.

Lena takes it and tears overwhelm her.

It's a drawing of Sam, Ruby, and herself in the L-Corp office. The colors are vibrant, the expressions emotive, and it's beautiful. The last time someone had given her art was Kara.

"What do you think?" Ruby's words hold uncertainty.

Lena grasps Ruby's hand. "It's beautiful," she says, softly. "Thank you." The pre-teen grins, and the pain, for a little while, recedes. She lets Ruby pull her up, plays along with finding a home for the drawing, and together they hand it above the mock fireplace. The same place where her photo her herself and Kara had sat.

She doesn't deserve this kindness.

That evening, Sam convinces her to finally go to bed. "Your back will thank you."

Lena gifts her a faint smile. "Fine."

"And I'll handle L-Corp. Don't worry about a thing, okay?" Sam shakes a finger at her. "You need to rest. Doctor's orders you know."

Normally she'd scoff and dismiss it. Normally, she'd buckle up and go in anyway. Normally, she'd push aside her emotions and work herself to the bone.

But the malaise has sunk its fingers deep. Lena only nods, and slips under the covers to hide once more. For the rest of that day, she reviews events. Reviews emotions. Reviews what she can recall.

What is real?

Can she ever trust Kara again?

She loves her still, and it hurts so much. Hurts more than even her brother's death.

She's stained, her heart fractured, and she doesn't know what to do next.

If only she could cut the pain out of herself, to stop the dishonesty so no one else will suffer.

For the first time in days, she leaves her room and takes out her laptop. She types up a tentative plan, works out a simulation, and sends it to Hope, her AI.

Sam finds her deep in coding at the dining table. It's late, the sun long set, and shadows etch across her walls. The television hums with a game as Ruby plays in the other room.

The soup Sam sets down smells delicious, but Lena only glances at it.

"What are you working on?" Sam pulls up a chair.

"What if I could code a way to end suffering?" Lena asks. Her fingers dance across the keys as she looks over Hope's simulation data. It didn't go as she hoped, so she's altering the algorithms. "To make it so no one lies, no one hurts another."

"A code to end suffering," Sam repeats. "Lena, are you suggesting mind control?"

"As if." Lena frowns and glances at Sam. "People can still do what they want. This would just prevent them from hurting anyone."

"That's still mind control."

Frustrated, Lena slaps her laptop shut. "Then what do suggest I should do to end suffering?"

"I think you're asking the wrong question," Sam says gently.

"Oh?" Lena crosses her arms and glares at Sam. "And what should I be asking?"

"I don't know." Sam stirs the soup and pushes it toward Lena. "You should eat. Ruby says you haven't touched any food today."

"I'm fine, Sam."

"Are you? It's okay to not be okay, Lena. You don't have to be strong for this. That's why we're here. You can lean on us. You can be honest with us. We're not going anywhere."

Sam's earnest words sear into her, and Lena looks away, unable to bear the sincerity, the kindness.

"I'm a murderer, Sam," Lena murmurs. "And I'm running simulations that you claim is mind control. I think we should be honest. I'm a villain after all."

"No, you're hurting, and you being, well, you, you're trying to science your way out of the pain. But that's not how it works." Sam gently pushes a lock of hair from Lena's face. "How about this. Let's brainstorm new projects. The more ridiculous the higher the score. I bet I can beat you." She smiles. "I'll even wager money on this."

Lena stares at Sam. "Wagering money that you can beat me on generating ideas? Sam, you'll lose. I'm the queen of ideas."

"Oh? Then prove it." Sam stands and snags several pads of paper. She shoves one at Lena with a violet pen. "Get generating, Lena. Because you're about to be out..." Sam pauses then grins, "... out a hundred dollars."

"Two hundred that I'll leave you in the dust," Lena snaps, unable to resist the competition. She's the one with the two degrees, while Sam only had an accounting degree. How dare Sam claim she can generate better ideas than Lena herself.

"Two hundred and fifty I'll beat you in volume."

Lena growls and furiously starts to write. For the next four hours, she and Sam pit their wits against each other. Papers get taped to the wall, doors, and windows. Ruby cheers them on and makes popcorn as Sam and her shout more and more unhinged ideas.

When Lena suggests nanite-made clothes that instantly clean when dirtied, Sam shoots back an idea of nanite cloth competitions for the most dazzling display of fashion prowess.

Lena tacks to the wall an idea to build a massive portal to send ships to Mars or the moon for colonies and lessen the stress of overpopulation on the ecological systems of Earth.

Sam ups her with portals to other solar systems and documentaries to showcase the work of the mechanics and scientists.

Lena throws the suggestion of science competitions amongst other planets, and the winner gets a grant to build whatever they desire.

Sam suggests competitions to build the biggest train in the solar system, one so big that it fits the moon inside.

Lena counters with an engine that could power such a massive train.

Sam slaps onto the wall her idea of a massive party on such a train, to bring the wonders of pop and rock music to the corners of the galaxy.

By this point, Lena is laughing and tempted to tape her Sam's mouth shut. They've reached an impasse, for each idea Lena generates, Sam twists it to something silly, and even Ruby struggles to decide who wins the round.

"Fine!" Lena throws the last of her pad into the air. "We're tied."

"Are we?" Sam turns to her daughter. "Ruby, as our judge, what is your assessment?"

Ruby spends several minutes tapping her lip as if deep in thought. "I declare...." She pauses for dramatic effect, "A tie. Both your list of ideas are fantastic, and I kind of hope you do some of them Aunt Lena."

Lena looks at the mess that is now her penthouse, how so many unhinged schematics adorn the walls, the lines of ideas that overlap each other, and it's so against her Luthor upbringing that she laughs. Laughs and laughs at the absurdity of her situation.

She decides to keep the ideas where they are.

To remind herself that even in moments of great pain, nuggets of joy can still be found.

Though she will not be building a massive space train big enough for moons, just for all the celebrity popstars to host concerts for other solar systems. No matter how much Ruby and Sam beg.

She has some pride, thank you very much.

[reveluving]

I have another ideaaaa 👀 I imagine Santi and Benny being very flamboyant when it comes to showing their admiration for someone. Imagine Rick bringing lunch to reader’s unexpectedly just to see Santi bringing her flowers and Benny giving her the heart eyes. My poor flag baby might have a stroke just from the scene in front of hiiimmm!!

a/n: Aria, baby. it’s been a long ass time ✋🏼😔 BUT THE FIXATION IS BACK (kinda. largely because I’ve been reading fics after fics of Oscar & Pedro chars. RAAAAAH). so we’re here baby, after 1 ½? 2 years later???? ENJOY

warnings: humour & fluff; poor Rick just wants to love you in peace.

j.k. m.list (series under 'rick flag vs the triple frontier boys'), or check out my full m.list!

Oh, you know Rick’s eyes are TWITCHING. The paper bag in his hand, packed with lunch from your favourite stop, crumpling in his grasp, almost tearing at the top. Not the food though, he’s not trying to ruin his wife’s favourite. 

But he’s chill. Absolutely chill. He swears. 

Benny and Santi just had to stop by the same time he came home from work, both leaning against the white porch railing while you sat prettily on the bench. 

Benny was expressive in whatever he was talking about, likely his last boxing match from the way he was holding the air in a headlock before the three of you shared a laugh. As much of a troublemaker they were, they were your friends, after all. He’d chase them off his property or warn them with a glare any day if it meant cutting off any form of ‘allegiances’ with that horrible past, both yours and his.

Just when you were about to reply to God knows what they asked, you noticed Rick lingering by the mailbox. Your eyes lit up, and it didn’t take the duo any other hints to know that he was home.

“Rick!” You enthusiastically waved at your husband, beckoning him to sit on the bench next to you. Rick couldn’t help but smile back at you, walking over and ignoring the two until he reached the top step of the stairs.

“Boys.” He greeted them, going over to shake Santiago’s hand before Benny’s, flexing his hands as they shook to see if the other would break. None did, as usual, pulling away and somewhat putting the tension on hold in favour of you. Rick took a seat next to you, passing you the bag of food and a soft ‘there y’go, baby’ (but not really, he made sure the two would hear it). 

It took a few seconds, making sure he greeted you with a kiss before stretching his arm to lay on the backrest behind you.

“So, what’s the occasion?”

“The boys just came over to say hi. Gave me these flowers from the flower shop nearby,” You raised the calla lilies that were resting on your lap. Now, Rick was no flower specialist, but he has been to the shop countless times to buy you your own fix. 

And if he remembered correctly, they generally represented beauty.

Well played.

“And Santi was just telling me about this new Cuban restaurant just outside the neighbourhood.” You continued, turning to Santiago with an encouraging smile so he could tell Rick about it.

“Cuban restaurant, huh?” 

Santiago curtly nodded to his curiosity. 

“The best. Might even be your new favourite once you both try it.” He explained, only to glance at the paper bag Rick was holding—a look that was almost… Judgemental? Critical? All of the above? All Rick knew that the man before him was silently scoffing at his choice. 

And, well, Santi wouldn’t exactly deny that claim, either. 

Rick didn’t hide the scoff, only to pair it with a faux smile so you could take it as nothing more than a harmless banter, “Gotta be real good then. ‘Cause this here,” He cocked his head in the paper bag’s direction, “Is my wife’s favourite place. Our favourite place.”

Rick not only had to watch out for the bold claim Santi was making, but he also had to bear in mind the sight of Benny openly looking at you like a lovestruck puppy. The promising boxer didn’t even care about the passive-aggressive argument going on around him. He was just appreciating the beaut in front of him.

(Man’s just doesn’t give a shit atm).

“Hey, I’m not here to burst your bubble,” Santi huffed in amusement, raising his hands in a defensive way, “But I’m not trying to give the pretty girl any mediocre recommendations either. C’mon Flag, you, of all people, should know that we want the best for her.”

“Aw, Santi, you’re too kind.” You were touched and it showed, and Rick couldn’t argue with the statement. Without a doubt, he wants what was best for you, be it food, comfortable clothes, gourmet treats for the fucking neighbourhood cat you adore—anything. 

In the midst of their silent argument, you reached for Rick’s hand, holding his larger ones in between yours, “I’m sure Rick and I will enjoy it,” He mirrored the warm smile as you stared into each other’s eyes for a moment, only to break when you addressed the two, “And if it’s as good as you said it is, we might as well have a get together.”

Oh. 

You were growing concerned of the two’s silence, eyes darting back and forth and almost—almost asking what was wrong until Benny, as if snapped out of his trance, finally, spoke up. 

“Absolutely.” Benny raised his hand in a manner that a believer would in church. 

Abso-fucking-lutely.

˚ · . f i n . · ˚

» gorgeous rose divider by the amazing @firefly-graphics ♡

[hello-vampire-kitty]

Servamp April Fools' event

Tanaka Strike reposted the event from 2023 that was about voting for characters' abilities/techniques. The first time I didn't look into the the event and I was surprised to see that among the abilities that were listed, there were a few that were revealed later in the manga,  for example Kuro's Wiedergänger (Ashes to ashes, dust to dust) that appeared in chapter 133.

In March 2023, chapter 128 was published, so it was 5 chapters later when the name of the ability was introduced in the story.

For the event, some characters have abilities that were marked as “lies” because they didn't appear in the manga however, Kuro’s ability was marked as a lie but that was actually true after all!

So yeah, Tanaka-sensei was playing with us. xD Abilities have two readings and you'll see that some of them either have one reading which is different or they some readings were assigned to other characters.

Mahiru: “Why is truth and falsehoods mixed in? Only the actual abilities should be voted!

Kuro: “Mahiru…In this world, you can’t survive on truth alone...

Kuro offering words of wisdom xD The abilities that were marked as "lies" have conversations or comments from characters which I translated.

Note: I listed the abilities based on the characters' names in alphabetical order.

GEAR

Mister Violence (Antique clock of night trick)

This is a reference to “Gear of Night Trick” on TanakaBox and that’s why I worded the translation like this. The clock referenced here must be Hlidskjalf. I wrote about it here when I posted chapter 96.

Youtarou: It's not an ability, it's just brute strength, isn't it?

Gear: I'm a wolf so I have no choice. It's a world that's tough to live in for someone like me.

Youtarou: Honestly! You always act like a wolf at times like this!

HYDE

Cute aggression (The Taming Of The Shrew).

Hyde: This is the most powerful ultimate technique that charms everyone! Kyui!

J-just joking...I don't have a technique like that... I'm s-sorry...I said I'm sorry...

JEJE

Mary Magdalene (Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring)

In chapter 125 when Jeje was given his name by Mikuni, his contract item was the winding key from the music box that Kiriko gave to Mikuni and I read that fans discovered that the song it was playing was "Jesu, Joy of Man's Desiring"

Jeje: This technique isn't... It's a lie...

KURO

Wiedergänger (Ashes to ashes, dust to dust)

Mahiru: Hey! If you're gonna lie, you should make it sound like it's… obviously a joke, or it'll just confuse people.

Kuro: Yeah...I don't really have a cool technique name. I'm just a humble cat...

LILY

Turandot (None shall sleep) Like I mentioned in the beginning, this is one ability that was given a different reading. The actual one is "The king is absent today as well." "None shall sleep " (Nessun dorma) is an aria from the final act of Turandot.

Mahiru: You had a technique like that?

Lily: Fufufu...Well… you could say it exists, or you could say it doesn't. Reality is such an uncertain thing. You should also be careful.

MISONO

Bridge falling down (The king is absent today as well)

So yeah, it's Misono and Lily that had their ability names switched and were also given different readings. The different reading is most likely a reference to the nursery rhyme "London Bridge Is Falling Down". And we don't have Misono, we have Mikado who comments about the ability xD

Mikado: Didn't Misono have a powerful technique like that?! Did you make it sound like it existed, Dodo?! Dodo: I included it as an option. Mikado: Nice work! Just for today, even a lie is permitted. I can’t believe Misono had only one technique, and it was from ten years ago (in real time)…As a parent I must do behind-the-scenes... Dodo: Young master is already in high-school...It's about time you... Mikado: This is a parent's duty! Should I add another one?!

SAKUYA

I will die yesterday by your side (Five-minute hypothesis theory)

Sakuya used this ability in chapter 139, however in the manga it says five "seconds" not minutes. The first reading sounds weird...Like, I haven't found a reference for it. "To die" is in the present tense even though it says "yesterday", so yeah, it's weird. I expected that it would be the name of a novel but I haven't found anything, so if some of you might have an idea about it, let me know!

Sakuya: I used this ability in the fight against Mahiru, didn’t I? It was such an emotional technique where I self-destructed to protect him. Tsubaki: Have you actually been reading Servamp??

TOUMA

The Beast of Gévaudan (The beast that crawls in a windowless room) (note, for the first part it's actually in French, La bête du Gévaudan)

Touma: What’s the deal with finishing moves? Aren’t you too old for this?

Iori: You're the one that has the most of them though....

Tooru: Shh!

TSUBAKI

Mahoroba (Under the moonlit night, rain and carnage)

Mahoroba isn't something that can be translated. It's a term that refers to an idyllic or perfect place, often associated with paradise or a beautiful land. The dictionary defines it as "great and splendid land (of Yamato)"

The other name of the ability is the title of chapter 84, which I initially translated as "On a moonlit night, rain and bloodshed"

Tsubaki: I don't recall mentioning such a technique name, but it seems okay as it is.

Ultimate Super Wars (Super Ultimate Form-Tsubaki-)

Tsubaki had another ability and when I googled アルティメットスーパーウォーズ a novel, I assume, showed up but I couldn't find much about it. Based on the cover of the book, I thought it was adapted based on a videogame but I didn't find a game with that title, so yeah, the name of the ability might not be related to it. Regarding these kanji 津薔鬼, they spell Tsubaki.

Tsubaki: Are there people who actually call me by such uncool name?

Get ready for an awesome technique in the next issue! Or perhaps the one after that.

YUMIKAGE

Valkyrie Brunhilde (Swan Lake)

Yumikage: This is actually my brother's...But I have many cool name ideas for my own abilities.

[bubblergoespop]

My Top Avior Quotes

this was so hard to cut down; this isn’t even half of the original list. also some angsty ones snuck in bc it’s AVIOR. @mokozroach ta daaa~

“I’m just a little testy after being trapped here for who knows how long thanks to the religious fanaticism of an uninformed peon.”

“The human who never stops asking questions, and the demon who thinks he knows everything. We make quite the pair, huh?”

“Do you trust me? Good, you shouldn’t.”

“If you ask me — which, no one ever does, but hey, when has that stopped me — …”

“I’m sure it feeds that knowledge hungry gremlin that’s apparently forever tap dancing across your neurons.”

“Don’t look right now, okay? Look at me. Look at my eyes. Yeah, like that. Just keep looking at me. Shhh… Hi.”

“This place won’t be the end of either of our voices, Starlight. I won’t let it.”

“Kissing you makes me think of lots of things. Some of them are even nice.”

“I wish I could show you Aria. It’s almost as beautiful as you.”

“What are you doing? I know what a hug is, Starlight, don’t be obtuse.”

“All I can tell you is that I fell in love with you two years ago when we got trapped in this place together. And I loved you two years later when I pulled you back in. And I still love you now.”

“I love the way you do that. How you hold my arms like that when I hug you like that. [..] It��s cute. And so are you.”

“But have you considered that means that everything visible here is a kind of illusion? Including… my clothes?”

“You look so heavenly like this, Starlight. Bathed in ethereal light. Gold dripping from gorgeous skin. Lips that taste like cinnamon and hope.”

“I feel things with you, that I’ve only tasted in the hearts of others before.”

“You’re an awakening from a dreamless sleep I didn’t know I’d settled into.”

“You make my heart bound. And you make my cock throb.”

“I’m left threadbare and shuddering in the wake of you.”

“In truth, the limits of my magic are the limit. But I would expend every last ounce of it for you.”

“Only you could leave me speechless. A rare gift.”

“We will be free of this place. But in the meantime, I’ve found a different kind of freedom in knowing you.”

“Deft implements like these deserve praise. I could just say you have nice hands.”

“I’m happy. Even in the midst of literal hell, surrounded by imagined medieval torment of damned souls… with you, I’m happy.”

“Tell me about it. Yes, the boring coffee shop, tell me about it. I want to hear it.”

“Simple pleasures. The things that shouldn’t feel special. But when I imagine them with you, I cherish them.”

“Starlight. Look at me. Please.”

“I do love you. But love is too easily used as an excuse for terrible harm.”

“You have one life. One fragile, beautiful life. Please don’t throw it away.”

“I’ll be gentle, I promise. Just let me help.”

“The things I feel for you fly in the face of every justifiable fear and suspicion this situation has burned into me. And yet, somehow, because it’s you… I don’t mind that.”

“I’ll grapple with the existence of my people’s ancient gods and them giving us a mission to save the world in a second. Right now I’m just trying to wrap my head around the idea that you don’t fucking hate me.”

“I’ll always find you. I feel you. Like a lighthouse in my senses.”

“In every hell we find ourselves, you’re heaven to me.”

[aria0fgold]

Living with Aly and Vita is like having two guardians telepathically communicating with me that is mostly at odds with one another. In other words, my head has been very chaotic with the addition of Vita.

[eqt-95]

a new kind of romance, pt 7

part 6 | cuddles - - - -

🎁 | mistletoe magic

“Ooh, look she’s doing it again.”

“Doing what?” Kara asked, shrugging off her jacket to join Nia and Brainy at a hightop laden with empty glasses.

“Mistletoe magic,” Nia sighed fondly.

“Mistletoe what-?” Kara glanced at Brainy who looked flush with a smudge of Nia’s shade of red on his own lips, and then her eyes tracked to Kelly and Alex two tables away giggling under the glowing branch of green leaves that glistened with the telltale golden sparks of magic. Of Lena’s magic. “Oh.”

She found the culprit loitering on the far end of the bar nursing a drink, smiling, and looking totally and completely huggable, and Kara’s mood immediately brightened. Not that it was sour: it was Al’s holiday party after all.

Kara’s natural reaction to seeing Lena was to superspeed over and engulf her into a super-sized hug and hope the burst of surprise and laughter would land quiet and private into the crook of her neck. 

She very nearly did exactly that except just as she was about to shift into sixth gear and race over Kara realized Lena wasn’t alone. More specifically, she was bookended by two people: Sam and... Andrea.

Which was… fine. Kara loved Sam and all the support she had for Lena. But Andrea? Kara was trying to find warmth for Andrea.

“How long has she been here?” Kara asked before the green-eyed monster could be swallowed down.

“Who?” Nia asked, distracted by a stuffed potato skin.

“No one," Kara blinked, brushing away imaginary crumbs from the table, "nothing. Forget it-”

“I believe Kara is referring to either Ms. Rojas or Ms. Arias,” Brainy interrupted, being all correct and stuff. Kara shot him a dark look that went missed because he was still trying to rub off remnants of lipstick.

“Oh, dunno,” Nia replied with a shrug. “I think they came together?”

“Sam and Andrea?” Kara asked for confirmation even though she definitely didn’t care.

“No, Andrea and Lena.”

“Oh. Sure. Right.”

Positively, absolutely, for sure wasn’t bothered by that.

“Why?” Kara asked nearly a minute later, interrupting a conversation she wasn’t listening to.

Nia paused mid-sentence and glanced at a very distraught-looking Kara. “Why what?”

“Why did they come together?”

“Who?”

“I believe Kara is referring to Ms. Rojas and-”

“Did they have a work meeting?” Kara interrupted, eyes jumping back toward Andrea who was far too cozy and far too close to Lena which was… fine. It was. It really was.

Nia’s mouth opened to respond. Then it closed. Then her eyes narrowed. Then they lifted. Then a smirk the size of the Nile spread across her face. “Why do you care?”

And Kara didn’t like the Nile-sized smile. She didn’t like it one bit. “No reason.”

“I dunno. Brainy, does she look a bit jealous to you?”

“I’m not-” Kara tried to cut in - whined, practically.

“Kara, you do look rather, as they say, ‘put-out’.”

“Does it have anything to do with Andrea subtly guiding Lena toward that mistletoe next to them-?”

“What? She isn’t-”

“Or are you just jealous Lena’s full attention is on her ex at all?”

Two things happened next: the first was that Kara fish-mouthed and blushed furiously because yea, obviously she was jealous. Who wouldn’t be jealous of someone getting Lena’s time. Not that Kara wanted to control her time or who she spent it with or…

And then the second thing happened. And that second thing was like an Acme anvil falling on her Wile E. Coyote state of confusion: she registered Nia's actual words.

“Her ex? Who’s ex? Sam’s ex? You… you mean Sam and Andrea, right? They’re exes?” 

Right? she shouted in her brain and maybe out loud.

The look on Nia’s face did not support this thesis because the look on Nia’s face was like she was looking at an alien, which technically Kara was, but ‘idioms’. 

“I don't know about Ms. Aria, but Ms. Rojas dated Lena for a number of years at boarding school,” Brainy confirmed and shattered Kara’s hopes and dreams and maybe her heart too just a little bit because at that exact moment Lena burst into laughter and Andrea looked so proud for being the source of said laughter and no, Kara’s eyes were not glowing red that would be preposterous but if they were it’s not like anyone would notice with all the colorful lights hung everywhere-

“Hey you know your eyes are glowing, right?” Nia asked before sucking up a bright purple drink from a tiny blue straw and smiling like the dang cheshire cat. 

Ok, so yea, maybe her eyes glowing red wasn’t, like, the greatest. 

“I need to get some food,” Kara mumbled, abandoning Brainy and Nia for the bar where M’gann was telling off a drunk Haverack wobbling on of his stool and J’onn was stepping up to intervene. Before his stony disposition could do its trick though, a tickle of gold flecks from overhead stalled the entire confrontation.

Kara wasn’t going to pout. She wouldn’t do that. She was a way calmer, cooler, collected-er kryptonian than that. 

What Kara was going to do though was lean against the bar and stare longingly at M’gann laughing when J’onn pointed to the glowing mistletoe that had not-so-subtly appeared above them.

The Haverack fell off his stool again, but that wasn’t what kept Kara’s attention.

“I’m sure M’gann is willing to share, darling.”

It wasn’t fair that Lena could make Kara jump and send her super calm, cool, collected demeanor catapulting out the nearest window with a little whisper. It also wasn’t fair that Lena was so so pretty leaning in next to her while wearing nothing more than a simple pair of jeans and sweater. A sweater that was too long in the arms and bunched at Lena’s wrists and made Kara want to pull her close and fly her home and wrap them both in a blanket for the rest of eternity.

Naturally Kara replied with a stammer and in a fit of indecision, she grabbed Lena's hand and also winked and then booped her head against Lena's shoulder.

Which was far from normal. It was because Lena was so pretty tonight.

But Lena was always pretty. She could make cardboard overalls look good. And sure, Kara had seen from a distance that she was just as jaw-dropping as ever, but seeing her up close? in Kara’s own space? where she could get lost in Lena’s soft pretty skin? where she could feel the piercing meant-only-for-her gaze and get all sorts of weak-kneed and breathless? where she could take in the perfect shampoo-perfumey-Lena mix that couldn’t be imitated because Kara, curious and missing Lena while she was off saving acquisitions and mergers once in Shanghai, had tried recreating the scent but failed? 

“I thought you weren’t going to make it. Duty calling and all that.”

“I’ve got one ear on the city, and deadlines can wait one more night,” Kara explained, trying to ignore the distraction that was Lena. Always Lena.

"Don't let Cat hear you say that," Lena smirked.

“Did I miss anything?”

“Just the usual: M’gann’s eggnog has half the bar dancing, though it looks like some hit it a bit too hard,” Lena said with a nod toward the passed-out Haverack, “and Nia is dragging Brainy under every green leaf in the place,” Lena chuckled. "Not sure whose going to tap out first."

“It sounds like someone is to blame for that ‘mistletoe magic’,” Kara replied, nudging Lena with her shoulder.

Lena hummed, her feigned ignorance betrayed by a revealing smirk. 

“Care for some?”

“S-some?” Kara choked, ears ringing.

“Mistletoe magic,” Lena explained slowly, one perfectly sculpted eyebrow arching with the elegance of a chandelier or an umbrella or hand-painted porcelain or-or… Kara didn’t know. She wasn’t thinking clearly.

Kara glanced across the bar toward Alex who was giving her a knowing stare and supportive smile that really looked more like a grimace mixed with nausea which meant only one thing: here it was, the chance. The chance Kara had spent minutes and hours and days pacing and hoping and yammering Alex’s ear off for. 

She had gone through every stage of fretting and panicking and unintentionally tearing her couch cushions in half before Kelly’s calmer touch gave her the confidence to believe in her own feelings and maybe - maybe - even Lena's.

Because that’s what Lena was implying now, right?

It was a frosting-covered finger. It was an intimately placed zipper. It was nonexistent personal boundaries that Kara wanted and wanted and wanted.

Now was the chance to put those feelings in motion. It was the perfect setting: holiday tunes were playing, lights were twinkling, the laughter and raucous of friends and family surrounded them. It couldn’t be any better, which was why Kara took a readying breath, propped herself against the bar in a way she hoped looked confident, and offered what Alex would later call the most manic-looking smile she’d ever seen.

“Well if it’s on the table…” Kara began bravely with a throat-clearing to steady herself, “uh, do I get to… er, you know,” she continued with the elegance of a newborn calf taking its first steps, “to pick?”

The wagging eyebrows probably didn’t help her efforts because she was met with a small Lena scowl that made Kara swallow and mutter some incoherent set of sounds and extend her finger toward the sprinkle of mistletoe hanging around the bar like Lena didn’t understand.

But then Lena said “oh” in this small sort of way that made Kara think that maybe Lena didn’t understand. So she clarified: 

“Put me in, coach!” Kara said, puffing up her chest with the kind of confidence reserved only for superheroes and poorly thought through actions.

And technically they were words. Maybe not the best words. Definitely not her best words. But together, it made a semi-coherent sentence that surely - definitely - made her intentions clear.

“Put you… in? I wasn’t… I meant-”

“You meant that since everyone else is… you know...” Kara said conspiratorially with a hand gesture that was meant to say everything else. “I don’t wanna miss out on that holiday spirit, right?”

“I didn’t, uh,” Lena began, a small cough and blush making her discomfort clear which made Kara want to hoover back those misguided intentions real fast and keep her dumb mouth shut. 

Then Lena’s scowl deepened to a version Kara wasn’t familiar with and definitely couldn’t identify which made Kara’s heart plummet. “Right, of course. Who did you-”

“I call dibs!” came an excited shout from behind Lena. 

And yea, maybe Kara should’ve been better at observing her surroundings because there was Sam. 

Who was standing on the other side of Lena. 

The whole time.

Not like it could be Kara’s fault though: Lena just had a way of making the rest of the world disappear. 

“Uh- '' Kara stammered because that technically - definitely - was not what she meant and having Sam sidekick her way through Kara’s ‘feelings’ reveal was not the chance she had pictured. But from the look of tempered frustration on Lena’s face, maybe she should be thanking Sam.

“Pucker up babes,” Sam said, dancing around Lena to split the two. “Lena, you don’t mind, right?” Sam asked, eyes bright and mischievous and far too excited for Kara’s waning courage.

“I don’t really think Kara needs my permission,” Lena replied with a tone that sounded… mad? Was Lena mad? 

“I meant the green leafy goods; get your magic hands moving, Luthor,” Sam said, jazz hands waving at her own sides.

“I-I'd only meant it for, uh, real couples-”

“Oh,” Kara answered while a ton of metaphorical bricks squeezed her chest empty of air and hope and confidence. 

Kara peered past Sam toward Lena who looked flush and annoyed and her jaw was clenched like a vice and, oh gosh, Kara had misread the whole situation. 

Maybe it wasn’t a frosting-covered finger or an intimately placed zipper or nonexistent personal boundaries that Kara wanted and wanted and wanted.

Maybe Kelly and Alex had talked her into a false sense of security. Maybe she had just barged in and ruined a perfectly good time. Had she just ruined a perfectly good friendship? Kara didn’t have an answer so instead she stared at the floor which was peppered with fallen mistletoe leaves and dirty napkins and cobwebs and… was that a ring?

“Oh relax, Lena. What’s the harm in a little-”

“Sam, enough-”

“I was kidding,” Kara practically shouted as an uncomfortable hand fidgeted with a pair of absent glasses. 

For having super hearing, Kara could only make out pin-drop silence, Sam’s shocked “what?” and Lena’s racing heartbeat.

“There isn’t, you know… I was just kidding. Can you imagine that? Supergirl kissing someone? Here? And-and besides, Lena’s right - you’re right,” Kara rambled, looking at her best friend who was decidedly not looking at her, “real couples only, and there isn’t, you know, anyone here who… uhm, yea.”

And then she forced a laugh because she wanted all of it to end.

It sort of did after that: 

Awkwardness ensued through silent sips and half-glances. Sam did her best to rope in the others, but Kara couldn’t shake the discomfort. 

Then Alex and Kelly offered their goodbyes - “babysitters are expensive!” - with Kara getting a tighter hug than usual from Alex that didn't make anything feel better.

Sam followed moments later with a matching reason and what looked like an apologetic smile - “minus the babysitter part. Ruby would skin me alive if I hired a babysitter. She already thinks she’s twenty.”

Nia, with Brainy in tow, made some excuse about needing to replace a lightbulb that no one believed because by then the color Nia’s lips had started the night with was now the color of Brainy's face, neck, and collar.

Which left Kara and Lena, and boy did Kara want to apologize for overstepping. Her fingers tapped on a bottle she didn’t remember getting while mustering the courage and bravery she thought she remembered having. She almost found it again.

Almost.

Except that’s the exact moment Kara realized it wasn’t just her and Lena, because Andrea picked that exact moment to reappear.

“Where’d everyone go?”

Lena said words and Kara nodded but didn’t hear. What she did hear was Andrea’s suggestion that they call it a night. Then she heard Andrea propose she and Lena share a cab - “we live two blocks apart, after all” - and within seconds had both jackets at the ready. 

Then Lena, who hadn’t said another word to Kara all night, looked briefly conflicted toward Kara before nodding.

“Goodnight, Kara.”

And then it did end. It ended without the right words or a hug and definitely not a kiss. It ended before it even began with Kara standing alone under a branch of forgotten mistletoe.

- - - - - - part 8 | new years

[retroaria]

HI ! I love your writing is it okay if you write nagi nsfw hcs ??

You know I totally forgot about my boy nagi so thank you for requesting this and making me lock in. :)

cw: aged up to 18+, MDNI!!!, afab!reader, honestly nothing too crazy, nagi ain’t a freak like that.

BLUE LOCK M.LIST | enjoy 😉 - aria | @aaliyah0022

Nagi Seishiro: NSFW Headcanons

I know it’s all anyone ever writes about but lazy sex with nagi is just a given. Sometimes you’ll be spooning and- oh! Yup, that’s his dick inside of you. (obviously he asked first consent is key). He tends to keep a steady yet sloppy pace when it’s like this, isn’t worried about you not cumming bc he can go on for forever in this position so trust me you will cum (not to mention he’s big enough to give you that nice stretchy feeling and hit all those sweet spots). His arms completely wrapped around your torso, hands roaming wherever they please, his hot breath and subtle groans deep into the crook of your neck, him thanking you afterwards. It’s like heaven.

While Nagi isn’t the most experienced partner he is definitely very open and willing to learn. The first time he made you cum gave him an epiphany. Seeing you like that, face contorted in pleasure, moaning his name in between brainless whimpers, walls clenching around him. This was a victory he was willing to work for.

Nagi in bed can be very different from Nagi at any other time. His careless lazy demeanor fades away and he becomes a needy, starving servant to the act. He even talks more during sex than he usually does. He’ll seriously drop whatever he’s doing at the time (even a league match, he’d risk it all). If you tell him you want him, let your hands roam his body and pull him into a sultry kiss, he’s all yours. “Where do you want me, baby?” He’d say in a low groan, ready to heed your every request.

He’s rarely selfish, finding that he gets off on pleasing you. He’s unashamed of the amount of times he’s came whilst rutting his hips against the bed like a needy dog with his head between your thighs, listening to the sounds of your pleading moans and your soaking cunt.

His favorite position is definitely the spooning one I mentioned before. Just fucking into you from behind, burying his face in the crook of your neck, one arm latched around you, fingers toying with your clit. He knows he looks like a feverish animal while doing it but it feels too good to care. Nagi is also a sucker for having you on top, riding and grinding on his cock as you need, using it to please your insides and holding onto him for dear life. He likes when you wrap your hands around his neck while you grind down on him, “Hahh~ god, love it when you use me like this- fuck”

Unlike Reo, he is not a fan of sharing. I’d imagine him trying to have a threesome but then regretting it when he realizes he hates every second you spend letting your attention fall on the other person and not him. Lets you know after that it will “never happen again” has to “re-fuck” you afterwards too bc chances are he couldn’t even get off during it. “I like you better like this, all mine, all for me.”

Nagi loves telling you he loves you during sex and he means it from the bottom of his heart. He doesn’t like sex that isn’t intimate which makes him rather against quickies. If he can’t have all of you for as long as he needs it feels like a waste of effort.

He’s not big on toys either. “Why do you need that? I have a mouth you know, hands too. Am I not good enough?” (He’s so dramatic smh) He’s fine with you using them when he’s not around, he even likes when you send him videos of you playing with yourself for him. Nagi has a collection in his photos app of your fucked out face and pretty body underneath him. He jerks off VERY often when you guys are separated, like multiple times a day, or at least he tries to. He has a hard time actually making himself cum sometimes because he gets frustrated that he doesn’t have you to do it for him and bored. He’ll just give up usually, sending you a picture of his sad, hard cock with a sad face emoji.

LOVES phone sex. When he’s having a hard time getting off without you around, he’ll call you and cum to the sound of your voice. Doesn’t like doing it through FaceTime, as much as he loves to see you, it’s just a hassle (same nagi, same). Loves when you guide him through it, telling him how to touch himself and tease himself until you hear his broken moans of your name on the other end and you promptly receive another photo of his cock with his cum dripped all over his lower stomach, but this time with a smiley face emoji

Nagi is an EXTREMELY good kisser and they are almost always sensual. He’s so loose and gentle with his lips on yours, tongue sweeping through your mouth. It genuinely feels like heaven, for both of you. He knows he’s a good kisser and uses it to his advantage. Any time your mad at him for something stupid he shuts you up with a needy kiss, any time he’s too tired to say what he wants he locks his lips with yours and lets his feverish hot breath say everything he needs you to know.

His list of turn-on’s is pretty random. He likes when you’re better than him at something, thinks it’s really hot when you beat him at games, if you play a sport that you’re really good at that turns him on too. He likes when you get defensive of yourself or him. Likes when you get angry but the pouty kind of angry bc when you’re actually mad he gets a little scared lol. Of course he likes the usual stuff too like seeing you in his clothes, sexy lingerie, revealing outfits, etc. you usually call him Nagi or Sei but hearing you say his full first name “Seishiro”, especially in a doting voice, it flips a switch in his brain and makes him putty in your hands. If you say it while he’s fucking you he’ll literally whimper.

[loraluna]

Rating Rune Factory Children

(Because I play favorites)

Rune Factory (1)

1/10

Cute but not much else to say. You have to wait a ridiculous amount of in-game time to get one short cutscene meeting your genderless nameless child (Game doesn't even bother to give them pronouns) and then never get to interact with them again. Disappointing.

Rune Factory 2

8/10

A unique idea that the series has yet to implement again, this game let you play through the second half of the game AS your child from the first half, and honestly It was a cool concept even if the gameplay got a little wonky and unbalanced near the end. The game also introduced the first female protagonist to the series, Aria (left). She and her twin Aaron (right) actually had some personality of their own and even had unique interactions with the other villagers and children of the town. Cool concept and solid designs. I just wish you could interact with them a little more as a parent before the timeskip.

Rune Factory Frontier

7/10

I may be a little biased here, as this was my intro to Rune Factory, but I love these kids. Default names; Leif and Leona, are the first, and so far only, RF children you can interact with at multiple stages, these kids have several cutscenes documenting different milestones and are quite cute to watch. Once they reach the final stage, they don't do much besides toddle around the farm and look cute. You can gift them certain items but that's about it. Still, It's refreshing to watch your kid grow over time as apposed to the usual montage you get with RF kids.

Rune Factory 3/ Rune Factory 3 Special

3/10

They get bonus points for being the first in the series to let you have multiple kids (up to three) problem is, there's not much difference between em. The birth of each one plays about the same and while there's technically some different "personalities" it's more like each kid get a random lot of four or so unique lines of dialogue and that's it. There are also just the two sprites so if you have two or more of either gender they'll be identical, no matter the age difference. You can't gift them and they don't sleep, leave the house or even show up on the map. Honestly they're little more than cute house accessories.

Rune Factory Tides of Destiny/ Rune Factory Oceans

4/10

First off, please pardon the crappy quality. This game doesn't have traditional character portraits so it's hard to find decent quality pics. Tides of Destiny kiddos were the first in the series to inherit physical features from the player's spouse. (Pictured are Electra's daughter and Sonja's son) They appear to use the same child models as Frontier with some minor cosmetic changes but I liked Frontier's kids so no complaints there. I do wish they had real portraits and more dialogue but they're okay. At least they'll accept gifts and the events leading up to their births are quite wholesome.

Rune Factory 4/Rune Factory 4 Special

9/10

RF4's kids are darn near perfect. Luna and Noel have identical dialogue but they have more to say than any RF kids before or possibly since. There are TONS of unique exchanges and events with them, they participate in festivals, and most interesting of all, you can equip them with gear and take them adventuring! These babies are really something special. If I had to pick one complaint, I'd say I wish they looked liiiittle more like their concept art. They look like they both got aged up a little, which isn't bad but they do look barely younger than some of their possible parents...

Rune Factory 5

9.5/10

Rune Factory 5's children are right up there with Noel and Luna, but they get a slight advantage when it comes to customization. Like RF3 this game lets you have up to three kids, but unlike that game, these kiddos are treated like actual characters. Depending on your choice of spouse and your answers in a particular conversation, your kids can have a variety of looks and personalities, including the fan favorite feature of inheriting hair and eye colors from the spouse, and continuing along that customization train, these babies can once again go adventuring! My one, one small gripe...It'd be nice if your eldest could grow a little by the time their siblings are born. Heck, it'd be cool if the villagers kids could grow too. I'd love to see teenaged Julian and Hina~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So there's my thoughts on the Rune Factory children. I hope future installments continue the trend of more giving their kids more personality and better customization, maybe someday we'll even see kiddos inherit traits from non-human parents? How cool would that be if your kid could actually look half elf or mermaid or furry wereanimal? XD

If you agree with me (or strongly disagree) feel free to comment. Always up for discussing my favorite franchise~

[whisperiin]

honestly, i can't believe his non-sfx coating is free t-t, Gojo glasses do things to me

okay, so, if i remember correctly, my request was about Commandant proposing to Wanshi, knee deep in Red Tide, "we know each other only a few hours and i'm delirious, but i know what i whant, when i see it"-style, during Echo Aria chapter

thank you in advance, and i think your writing still on point, glad you're back .)

ahh i'm so embarrassed i'm sorry!!!! i had two wanshi rqs in my inbox so i wasn't sure which one you meant... this time i wrote the correct one!! i hope you enjoy!!

honestly i'm sooo glad his coating is free... and he's free too? kurogames is spoiling us. i kneel... now we just wait for lucid dreamer gacha skin in a million years.......

marriage proposal ft. wanshi (and the red tide)

content warnings: none

To say WANSHI is surprised would be the understatement of the century — his eyes widen, his mouth hangs a little agape, and his cheeks growing warm. Ah, he thinks, more than a little bewildered, maybe the exertion is getting to him. But he blinks once, twice, and still sees you down on one knee, the Red Tide lapping dangerously close to your shoes.

He’s quick to mumble an apology, his gaze shifting away from you. Neither of you are exactly in the position to answer that question, will you marry me, properly, after all. Wanshi might even look you over for a second — maybe you’ve gotten injured and started growing delirious? He’s sure Lee would kill him if anything happened to you under his watch.

And, if he’s being honest, he doesn’t want anything bad to happen to you, either — his gaze keeps getting drawn back to you during the rest of the mission, making sure you’re still behind him, making sure nothing sneaks up on you… Not just because of your proposal, of course, but he can’t deny the way it lingers a little in the back of his mind for the rest of the day.

It’s not until you’re both back on Babylonia that he finally gives you an answer... of a sort. He tucks away the latest of many gifts you just handed him — the staff members in the room seem to whisper amongst themselves when he mentions running out of space in his sleeping pod for them, how odd… — a small smile tugging at his lips as he recalls it. Commandant, he’ll begin, taking in every detail of your face, you didn’t ask anyone else that question, did you?

It’s a bit early to get married, he thinks — but if it’s anything like this, his cheeks growing warm as he regards you, your eyes widening as he rubs grime off your face with his thumb — maybe, if you give him some time, he’ll be the one asking you to marry him, instead. For now, just your company is enough.

(Still, though, he kind of likes how it sounds calling himself your husband.)

[trans-luis-serra-navarro]

HI ERIC HELLO PLEASE HEAR ME OUT

i literally can't stop thinking about something

i loveee re6 AUs with luis, but

death island!luis !!!!

specifically, a scenario where he saves leon instead of/with rebecca. like imagine him working with rebecca on the vaccine and delivering it to the island to save leon and the rest 😭😭

and i actually see two scenarios here

either luis is obviously alive and all, and leon knows it, and it's just, hey! my husband's here to save the day!!

OR it's a big reveal lol. rebecca shows up there like, 'a friend helped me', and it's LUIS there with her. like, i know rebecca is super capable and she made the vaccine all alone in the movie , but just imagine if it was actually a bit more complicated, so she would have to reach out for help, and who would be better than luis

i NEED to see luis and rebecca team up, they'd work so well together 😭😭

and older serennedy!!!!! omg

i just need to see older luis 😭😭 and the parallel with him delivering the suppressant in re4, and now the vaccine

i don't know what i wanted to say with this and i really didn't think it through that well, and it's rushed, but i really need to share these thoughts 😭

@silverhexrt HI SO UM. THIS ASK WAS SENT IN JUST OVER A WEEK AGO and it gave me SUCH AGGRESSIVE brain worms that I was like Oh this would make for SUCH a cute little Drabble!!!!! But then I just. Kept going. So I accidentally made a whole entire fic for you!! I really truly hope you don’t mind!!!!!!!!! ;^^/

I know this blog is more of a character analysis blog so if you or anyone else still wants to talk to me about the LOGISTICS of what Luis in Death Island would look like I’d be MORE THAN HAPPY TO RAMBLE cuz I am SO FASCINATED by how that would work character and legalities wise,,, but uh for now!! I hope you don’t mind this little thingymadgig I made!!!

Fatigue was the overwhelming sensation dragging Leon’s body down. His breathing was labored and his skin burned against the Velcro of his protective gear- far from unfamiliar territory in terms of the worst symptoms he’d survived. But this somehow felt so, so much worse.

Leon felt like he was dying. Like actually dying. Which was downright terrifying.

He hated that he even knew what dying felt like. Leon could easily pick up on the little ways his body began to shut down; it felt like he couldn’t breath in far enough to fill his lungs, his limbs felt weighed down by an invisible force, his vision was blurry… except, this time, it was his own body killing him from the inside-out.

He was much more used to- even comfortable with- the close brush of death being from the hands of a Bioweapon or loose debris crushing his body. Leon at least had some level of control in those scenarios. He could kick and wriggle and spit and cuss out whatever was holding him down until a miracle freed him and he could load bullets into the face of whatever was hunting him.

But Leon couldn’t run from his own body, no. And oh, how badly did he wanna run until his legs burnt beneath him.

Leon had only ever felt that inherent, gut-wrenching urge one other time. One other time when he was on the brink of death and freedom alike; warm tan hands and cold needles in an isolated village so far from home. Leon could’ve taken the medicine and ran. He could’ve watched the world burn from behind his lovers back as they chased windmills without a care in the world.

He could’ve faced death in the eye. He could’ve taken the blade of the knife for him. He could’ve been just a fraction of a second too late for Ashley. Oh, the possibilities.

What a weird time to be thinking about Valdelobos. Maybe it was just his oxygen-deprived brain desperately trying to connect the dots for one last dream. Like falling asleep with the TV on and having a dream about the movie you’d just watched. Arias had his own ‘inspirations’ from Los Illuminados, after all. Maybe he was just trying to think of one last happy memory to drift off to.

Leon hoped dying would be a little bit like falling asleep. He was never religious, never superstitious- but deep down he hoped that he’d be reunited with the loved ones he’d lost. Finally, finally getting the chance to feel those warm palms against his cheek that he missed oh-so dearly.

Leon sighed and let the concrete below his hands wobble a little. He could just barely make out Chris and Claire’s labored breathing from behind him- the only other thing keeping him grounded.

But god was it getting hard. He couldn’t tell if it was just the pure exhaustion or the virus or what, but Leon’s head felt so heavy. Heavy enough that it almost felt as though somebody was holding it up for him. He let himself pretend, just for a moment, that it wasn’t just his imagination. That the warmth on his cheek wasn’t his flushed skin and were instead the hands of a lover, keeping him upright and rested against a beating heart that Leon was sure was just the blood roaring in his ears.

He let himself pretend that the stroke he felt against his cheek was his lovers thumb. A lover so considerate that they’d wipe the blood off of his skin and tuck the loose hair behind his ears. He pretended that the murmuring of his ears giving in was somebody talking to him, whispering comfort in his final moments.

Leon almost let himself give in completely to the imaginary man holding him- the distant scent of leather and cigarettes felt so real, after all- but a cold prick against his neck and the immedie, cold relief of fluids beneath his skin snapped him back to reality.

His breathing came back to him in time with his heartbeat, his fingertips pulsed with the sudden pumping of blood, and…

The feeling of somebody holding him hadn’t gone away.

His cheek was still warm with another man’s hand. His nose still stung with the smell of leather.

His heart was still beating in time with somebody else’s.

Leon hesitated. He didn’t want to open his eyes. He knew he was just dreaming- that he’d look up and the vision of the man he yearned for every night would disappear like a mirage. He wanted to keep them closed and pretend for as long as possible. Until-

“Leon? ¿Corazón? Mierda, Rebecca, he’s not responding-“

Leon’s eyes opened just slightly.

He was staring down at the concrete, somebody must’ve moved him to get access to his neck easier. But he wasn’t dreaming. He wasn’t dreaming of the arms clad in white wrapped around his shoulders and the ringlets of curls that fell around his vision, shielding him from the fluorescent Alcatraz prison lights.

Warm hands went back to stroking his cheek.

Leon wasn’t dreaming.

“Leon? Oh, please wake up,”

His voice sounded so broken, so quiet. Leon had never heard of it like that. It broke his heart.

“I can’t- I can’t leave you here, not like this, not again, please…”

Leon couldn’t take it anymore. He was terrified to roll over and face the man he’d chased in his dreams for so long but he had no other option. He’d rather he disappear and it all be his imagination than hear him this sad ever again.

Leon turned his head and blinked up at Luis like a newborn deer. His big, brown eyes were wet with tears but that stupidly charming smile was unmistakable.

“Hey there, Leon…”

Luis managed to croak out, the hand against his cheek trembling from the tears. Leon reached his own shaky hand up to brush Luis’ long, grayed locks out of his face just as he had done moments before for him.

“I must be dreaming,” Leon huffed out, and Luis chuckled, shaking his head and the tears from his reddened cheeks at the same time.

“If you’re dreaming, then so am I, I’m afraid”

“I’ll take my chances.”

Luis chuckled and Leon wasn’t far to follow suit. Even with the end of the world on his shoulders- even with Dylan fighting tooth-and-nail to break down his, Jill’s and everyone else’s spirits- Leon still found time to laugh with Luis like it was autumn of 2004 all over again.

“Just like old times, eh, Sancho?” Luis gave a little sniffle, and while Leon had more than too many questions to ask- how he was even alive was obviously the most pressing- he just couldn’t find it in himself to care.

“Yeah,”

He let himself rest his head against Luis’ chest. Heart beating strong, almost as if to mock Leon for ever doubting his lover's strength.

“Just like old times, Don Quixote…”