#the same guy to request his friends to log into his social media accounts and post ‘not me dying’ on his behalf directly after he dies

[my-blooming-darling]

Kokonoi’s instagram handle is “koko-puffs” and he’s the type to comment “it’s giving carcass vibes” under some of your posts but will start a comment war if anyone else says anything mean

[pablotorresgf]

i’m not the only one- Pablo Gavi

In which you weren’t enough to make him settle.

Warnings: this is pure angst!

Notes: guys I know I’ve gone ghost but I hope you guys enjoy this, I know it’s not very long. I’ve seen all the fluffy request and I’m trying my best to write them!

You wished you hadn’t logged into Twitter. You wished you could unsee everything, every picture, every tweet. You had noticed that Gavi was trending on Twitter, you thought nothing of it thinking it was about the upcoming match, but once you clicked on his name photos and videos flooded your feed. In one picture Gavi, your gavi, had another girl sitting on his lap. Hand in hand. In a blurry video the girl pulled his face towards hers and they started making out. If the other picture wouldn’t have been leaked you wouldn’t have noticed it was your Gavi.

All those photos and videos went viral in seconds. Your socials were blowing up.

“Golden boy Gavi having too much fun to remember he has a girl at home” one of his fans had tweeted. “I can’t believe Gavi would do such a thing” you were glad that some of his fans were on your side, seeing as he a countless of times declared his love and admiration for you. You felt betrayed and embarrassed. Betrayed by all the Barcelona boys who claimed to be your friends, betrayed by Gavi himself who always promised to protect you and never hurt you. You were humiliated. Humiliated about how thousands of people were finally having the satisfaction of dragging your name across the dirt.

You decided to text Pedri to see if he knew where Gavi was, but you regretted opening Instagram too. Half of the Barcelona team had posted videos of them drunk, but what hurt you most was that Pedri had posted a video of Gavi and that girl dancing on each other and he was hyping them up. This was the same Pedri that you had a strong platonic relationship with, the same Pedri that would argue with Gavi if he ever did something to make you sad. You knew that they weren’t in the right state of mind but none of that mattered to you, they did what they did.

You were beyond exhausted and had no energy to argue even if Gavi returned home or ended up leaving the party with that girl, you wouldn’t be surprised.

Gavi was currently in the back seat of a Uber with pedri on their way home. Gavi knew he had fucked up he felt insanely guilty, he didn’t know what was going through his mind when he let that girl flirt with him let alone kiss him. At this point Gavi was hyperventilating Pedri was trying his hardest to calm him down. “Cálmate Tío, llámale aver si sabe lo que paso.” Gavi wanted to scream at him, calling him stupid of course you knew, his name was trending all over social media, pictures and videos were leaked. But as Gavi looked for your contact he saw that your messages were green, and that calls would go straight to voicemail. Clicking on the instagram app be noticed that your account was no where to be seen. “Pedri no me sale su cuente y los mensajes no se mandan y no suenan las llamadas.” Pedri let out a deep sigh he was feeling extremely guilty as well, he was supposed to be your best friend he was supposed to keep Gavi in check for you, he was supposed to discipline him for doing what he was doing instead of encouraging it. Pushing his luck he decided to call you. Straight to voicemail. Texts were green. Your account was completely gone. “Me bloqueo también.”

When Gavi arrived home he decided to sleep in the guest room, he knew that you didn’t want to see him by your side when you woke up.

He was up before you that morning with a nasty hangover. But was worse was the guilt eating him alive. His relationship was slipping and he wanted to fix it. He made breakfast for the both of you and waited for you to wake up to talk to you.

As you woke up you were certain that Gavi wasn’t home. You headed straight to the kitchen and saw Gavi sitting there with a guilty look on his face. You were amused, amused at the fact that he had the nerve to sit at the table with breakfast ready like if he wasn’t kissing another girl the night before, amused by the fact that guilt was eating him alive. That’s just how you wanted him to feel, guilty, embarrassed, and ashamed.

“Amor, necesitamos que hablar” he stated. You were disgusted at the pet name that was coming out his mouth. The same pet name that used to make you feel like the only girl in the world, now making you feel like the other women.

“Mi nombre es t/n, no es amor, nomas t/n.” You corrected him with a disgusted look on his face. You had no more respect for the boy in front of you. You had no more tears in you. You were just disappointed and angry. All you thought about last night was how you were going to break up with him in the most heartless way. You wanted him to feel just how you felt last night.

“Baby please… don’t be like that.” He said while standing up and taking step towards you.

“That’s not my name Pablo.”

“Perdóname por favor bebe, no estaba pensando bien ya se que eso no es una excusa pero no era mi intención.”

“Are you hearing yourself Pablo? I trusted you enough to go to that party i fucking trusted Pedri too so nothing would happen, but then this happens! You cheat on me while mostly all your team is there you know how humiliating that is seeing all these pictures and all your fans finally having the satisfaction of us not being together. You looked so happy in those fucking videos you were having the time of your life having another girls tongue down your god dam throat and all you have to say is sorry? You said while tears were streaming down your face, you couldn’t keep your emotions in. “It was embarrassing but thankfully all this will be over because you won’t be seeing me anymore.”

“What do you mean?” He said with his voice trembling.

“We’re done Pablo, there’s no more Gavi and y/n, i hope she was worth it.”

“No-no y/n, I made a mistake I know that but you have to understand that she didn’t mean anything it was a mistake, it’ll never happen again.”

“I know it won’t happen again Gavi, because we’re done. Over.”

Realization started to hit as you took in the scene in front of you, you almost felt bad, you’ve never seen gavi this broken down before he looked like a little kid who lost his mom at the store. There was a pout present on his face with tears streaming down his face. It took all your self respect to not hug him and comfort him, but instead you walked past him and grabbed your keys.

I have loved you for many years

Maybe I am just not enough

You've made me realize my deepest fear

By lying and tearing us up

[storiesforallfandoms]

the only one for me ~ machine gun kelly

word count: 1493

request?: yes!

“MGK Fluff ??”

description: the endless dating rumors regarding her boyfriend start to get to her

pairing: machine gun kelly x female!reader

warnings: swearing, insecurities

masterlist (one, two)

Logging onto Twitter and seeing yet another dating rumor regarding my boyfriend and some famous, beautiful female was basically a daily routine at this point. It seemed to be nothing new, but that didn’t make it hurt any less every time I saw a new post about it.

The latest rumored lady to have “stolen Colson’s heart” was Megan Fox, who had starred in Colson’s latest music video. The article I was reading stated how much chemistry Colson and Megan had on set and how it was “so obvious” that they had a secret romance happening behind the scenes.

I wasn’t hurt because I believed the rumors. I trusted Colson. I knew he’d never cheat on me, but seeing all these beautiful women and seeing his fans and media outlets commenting on how cute he would look with someone else so much prettier than me really did nothing for my confidence.

I wasn’t famous, I was just your average girl who worked an average hob and went to school on the side. Due to this, Colson and I decided to keep our relationship a secret so I wouldn’t be harassed by paparazzi and fans. I appreciated the privacy I had been getting, but it did make it hard to see all these dating rumors.

This rumor got to me in a way the others hadn’t before and I had an overwhelming urge to call Colson. He was probably asleep or preparing for the show that night, but I needed to hear his voice.

I was shocked when he answered on the third ring. “Hey babe!”

I could hear a crowd on his end of the call. “Hey! What’s all the noise?”

“We’re celebrating before I go on stage.”

“Before?” I asked, teasingly. “What are you guys celebrating?”

“The Bloody Valentine video hit a million views in less than 24 hours! None of my videos have ever done that before, so we’re celebrating.”

“Oh my God, Colson that’s amazing! Congratulations!”

Someone called out to Colson on his end. I could hear him responding, but his response was muffled as I realized the voice was a female voice.

“Is that...is that Megan?” I asked.

“Yeah! We invited her since she’s the leading lady of the video.” Another comment was made by Megan, to which Colson said to me, “She says hi!”

I couldn’t respond. I could feel tears starting to well up in my eyes and I was afraid Colson would hear my voice breaking if I spoke. Instead, I managed to squeak out a “gotta go” before hanging up.

~~~~~~

As I expected, there were articles published about the video celebration, specifically about Colson and Megan. A handful of pictures were taken outside wherever the celebration was taking place of Colson and Megan laughing as he puffed on a joint. The captions posted under this picture from numerous sites and fan pages were all the same: “look how cute Megan and Colson are!”

I had to go offline for a while because I was getting more upset than I had before.

It seemed like Colson didn’t notice as much as I did, so I never really brought the issue up. I didn’t want him to think he couldn’t be friends with women, or think of me as a jealous girlfriend or anything.

But I knew he could tell something was off. He kept trying to coax it out of me, but I wouldn’t budge. I figured he would grow tired of my refusal and would let it go. The last thing I expected was to come home from work one day and find Colson waiting for me in my apartment.

“Hey!” I said when I found him sat in my living room. “What are you doing here?”

“We have a few days before the next show, so I asked to come home before then,” he said. “I wanted to talk to you.”

The six worst words to ever hear. I felt my worry rise as I approached him and sat next to him on the couch.

“What’s on your mind lately?” he asked. “I know you keep saying it’s nothing, but I can tell it’s not nothing. I’m worried about you, babe. You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

I looked down at my lap as I shrugged. “It’s nothing. Just work and school, I guess.”

“Is this about Megan?”

For some reason, hearing him say her name felt like I was being stabbed through the heart. I had to bite my lip to try and hold back my tears.

“When you hung up so suddenly during the video celebration, I realized something was up,” he said. “And then you started deleting your social media accounts, or making them private, and you were acting different. It all started that night. If it’s because we invited Megan to the party, I’m sorry if that upset you. There was no underlying meanings behind inviting her, it was just because she was in the video and we decided she should be at the celebration.”

“It’s not because she was there!” I finally snapped, unable to hold myself back. “I don’t care if you’re friends with Megan, or with any woman, but I do care that everyone thinks you’re dating every female who so much as breathes in your direction. And it really doesn’t help my self-esteem to see people saying how happy you look or how cute you’d look with someone who is, like, a million times prettier than me.”

“Babe, that’s not true,” he said. “I mean, I’ve seen the rumors about me and Megan, but it’s not all the women I’m friends with - ”

I laughed, humorlessly. “No, not all of them. Just Chantal and Noah and Ash and Sommer and now Megan. So no, not all of them, just most of them.”

I could see the gears turning in Colson’s head as he thought about it. Maybe he didn’t see the same stuff I did, maybe I just saw more because of how insecure it made me. But those rumors were there, and they had been nearly our entire relationship.

“I’m sorry,” he said again. “I never realized...I don’t attention to shit like that. I never thought much about the way I acted around my female friends.”

“You treat them the way you treat the boys,” I said. “I’ve seen how you are with Ash, the two of you are just friends. But people don’t believe that men and women can just be friends so when they see men and women acting as friends, they assume that means they’re dating. There’s nothing you can really do about it.”

Colson put a hand on mine and gave it a squeeze. “You don’t believe any of that shit though, right? You know it’s all media bullshit.”

I nodded. “Yeah, of course I do. I know you’d never cheat on me. I trust you so much.”

“And you can’t possibly believe that they’re any more beautiful than you are.”

I chuckled. “Okay, that one I can’t agree to considering the person you’re currently in a dating rumor with is Megan fucking Fox. I mean, have you seen her? She’s the most beautiful woman in the world!”

“Not to me she’s not.”

I looked away from him again, feeling my cheeks heat up and a small smile tugging at the corners of my lips. “You don’t mean that.”

“Of course I do.” I felt his finger gently touch my chin, lifting my head so I would look at him. “(Y/N), I hope you know you mean the world to me. You’re the most beautiful woman I have ever known, and you own my heart. You’re the only one for me and I love you more than words could ever say. I’m sorry you’ve had to witness all these stupid rumors, and I’m sorry I never noticed them so I could assure you of all of this sooner. But I mean it, you’re everything to me. I love you so much.”

The tears I had been holding back for so long finally started to fall down my cheeks. I awkwardly laughed as I tried to wipe them away, but they just kept coming. “That was so cliche.”

“You loved it, though.”

“I love you, that’s a whole different thing.”

Colson smiled and pulled me in for a kiss. Warmth filled me as my lips touched his, and it was just another reminder that he was mine. I ran my hand through his hair and leaned into him until we were both laying back on the couch.

When we finally managed to pull away from one another, Colson rested his forehead on mine. “Did you have any other plans today?”

I shook my head.

“Good, because I don’t intend on letting you leave this apartment any time soon.”

He wrapped me into a tight cuddle, and I gladly accepted these plans he had made for us.

[heretic-altias]

FFXIV Characters as Star Stable Players

Went through a ton of them talking to my friends and thought maybe some people out there somewhere might enjoy these so look below the cut to begin bc there's a lot of them.

Alphinaud: Every horse is level 15. He feeds them every day. Meticulously plans the best gear out for racing and studies each track. Top high score racer on his server, also does champs in his spare time. Will talk about racing to anyone who will listen

Alisaie: All her horses range from levels 1-5 and are depressed. She never feeds them, she's not wasting star coins on stable care when she could be saving up for another horse for her collection. Beat Alphie in a championship one time, will not let him live it down. Spends most of her time either chasing Alphie around or messing with her friends.

Thancred: has no idea what hes doing but Ryne really likes this game so he's playing with her. Lets her pick and name horses for him.

Ryne: Adores all of the horses. Roped both Thancred and Gaia into playing with her. All of her horses have names and personalities and she loves talking about them. Never asks for star coins because they're expensive, but Thancred always gifts her some on double sc weekend.

Gaia: Another one in the 'never feeds the horses club' has one Friesian and insists it's the best horse in the game and the only one she needs. It's level 15 bc she literally never rides another horse. Mostly plays with Ryne. Wrote a backstory for her horse at Ryne's urging, it's very edgy and tragic.

Y'shtola: Rarely plays. Saves up for a horse, logs on, buys it, takes pictures of it, and leaves for another two months until she can afford another.

Urianger: Spends 300 years naming each horse. Has an entire backstory for his character and all of their horses. Obsessed with the lore, frequently writes long lore posts for sso tumblr. Ryne loves reading his fics. Owns all of the old disc games, spent forever trying to get ahold of them and now treasures them.

G'raha Tia: The WoL likes this game so he expected it to be amazing. Ended up playing mostly with the others, but not really on his own. He just really likes hanging out with everyone else. Thinks all of the horses are nice, could never criticize a new release. Probably named his starter after the WoL or asked them to name it for him.

Emet-Selch: Hates every update. Writes long tumblr posts about how the game is terrible now and used to be better. Only rides old models, has thousands of star coins saved because he refuses to buy any of the new horses.

Lahabrea: Constantly leaves comments on sso's instagram about what they should add to the game. Takes it personally when those things don't appear literally the next week. People wonder why he still plays this game bc all he does is complain on instagram over stupid things. Still adores each of his horses and knows their names and personalities.

Elidibus: Analyzes every update and its pros and cons. Thinks SSO should hire him. Posts carefully worded critique posts that he spent hours thinking out. Forgets to actually play the game because he's so focused on doing this.

Aymeric: Loves taking screenshots. Will carefully coordinate every outfit and tack set he has and loves spending his time on it. Probably an instagram celebrity, maybe even an ambassador. Owns a well known club. Only says nice things about the game online to avoid drama, but admits criticisms to his friends.

Estinien: Instagram famous only because he's in Aym's club and Aym posts about him a lot. Complains about other players annoying him. Eventually privates his account bc Aym's fans are driving him insane. People probably wonder why Aym hangs out with him. Lets Aym take screenshots of him and goes to all the club events even though he'd rather just play his msq and save up for horses because he knows Aym is happy.

Lucia: acts as the co owner of Aym's ingame club. Helps filter out some of the chaotic join requests they constantly get. Manages the wait list, handles the club instagram page. Likes to run her training route every day.

Haurchefant: Thinks every horse is great, also in Aym's club. Loves being an instagram celebrity and talks to his fans all the time. Writes lots of posts about how great his friends and the game are. He's just here to have a good time.

Zenos: wants to race against everyone all the time. Gets mad if you say no. Competes with Alphie for those top scores on the server. Probably has one of those ongoing weirdly dark Instagram story accounts where characters like die and horses are stolen/abused and such.

Ysayle: collects pretty horses and enjoys screenshotting them. Likes light colors and a winter type aesthetic. Her club is the other big club on the server besides Aym's. They all ride white horses and matching outfits. She tries really hard to diffuse any drama in the community.

Hien: honestly just probably having a fun time. Likes to host tumblr meet ups just to talk to the people and hang out. Posts mediocre memes that are really only successful bc he's the most active meme page on tumblr. Everyone knows he's a really chill guy.

Arenvald: Probably plays with Alphinaud sometimes but is a little lost when Alphie starts talking about his racing obsession. Still likes to hang out with him even though Alphie crushes him whenever they race.

Minfillia: Owns the club all the scions are in, but it's really just a club for their friend group to chill in. Probably plans events for them all and coordinates everything so that everyone can make it. Takes good care of all her horses, reminds everyone to buy stable care each week even if they dont actually do it.

Lyse: Only feeds the horse she's riding. Loves running championships just for fun on whatever horse she happens to have when the announcement pops up for one. Chats with other players in the race waiting areas, and sometimes even in global if theres nothing happening.

Papalymo: Plays with Lyse. Tries to tell her she'd have more success in champs if she fed her horses and got some tack with actual stats, but she doesn't listen. Sometimes lets her beat him so she feels good about the race.

Fandaniel: insane. Constantly bugs the game and glitches into locked areas. Brags about it to anyone who will listen.

Magnai: really wants to start a romance RP in global. Never finds anyone who wants to play bc everyone reminds him they're against the game's rules.

Sadu: probably making fun of Magnai in global. Likes to start fights in that chat.

Nero: loves finding glitches and testing exploits. Knows a concerning number of ways to use cheat engine for funny things without being banned. Never actually cheats and uses these things solely for meme purposes. Probably leaks horse coats/models online before release just to watch the chaos.

Cid: Also good at finding bugs, but does so in order to report them to SSO support. Nero hates him reporting all the good bugs.

Ardbert: Has a little friend group club with the the other heros from the first. Doesn't really use social media, they prefer to just use their discord server with each other. All of them train together most afternoons.

Tataru: Her gear closet is perfectly organized. Every horse has an assigned stall. Also writes them backstories. Plans out her star coin saving months in advance and exactly what horses she'll buy in what order. Does not stray from it even if a new one comes out, she'll add it on to the end.

Krile: Another lore nerd, started playing at the same time Alphie did and sometimes reminds him about what he was like as a new player. Loves writing and responding to lore posts. Her and Urianger probably interact online a lot.

Louisoix: Played star stable years ago, was super famous in the community. Quit playing a couple years ago but everyone still talks about him. Others desperately try to be like him, but nobody can fill his shoes in the community.

Forchenault: Writes extensive posts of what he thinks of the game, mostly complaints. Will fight anyone who disagrees. Refuses to meet up with anyone else ingame, nobody actually knows if he even logs on still or just complains. Thinks actually playing every day is a waste of time.

Ashai: Instagram fanboy for zenos and his weirdly dark story. Zenos isn't even famous, he has like 220 followers, but Asahi worships the ground he walks on. Runs a fanpage for him where he just reposts Zenos's screenshots/edits and talks about how great they are. Draws fanart too, but he's a terrible artist. Zenos pretends he doesnt exist. Purposely switched his server to the one Zenos plays on and always keeps an eye out for him.

[a-singleboat]

Virtual Reality

Word Count: 2.4k

Request: hi! if your taking requests, i was wondering if you could write a damien x reader, where they meet through Twitch? add anything else you want i always love everything you write, thanks so much!! - anon

Warning(s): like, one swear

It was a Thursday night when you first met him, or rather, heard of him. You had been streaming for five hours heading into your sixth when you decided it might be time for you to log off for the night. As per usual, you took at least thirty minutes at the end of your stream just to talk with your viewers, usually about how their lives were going in exchange for a story from your own day. 

Tonight, however, there was an influx of people asking if you’d ever heard of a streamer by the name of Damien Haas, which you hadn’t, and if you would do a collaboration with the man anytime soon. Apparently, your content was eerily similar and you were, and I quote, “Practically the female version of him, looks aside.” 

“Damien Haas…” you rolled yourself back closer to your desk, hands settled on your keyboard. You typed his name into the search bar, patiently waiting for Twitch to pull up his account. You clicked into the first one, making an impressed face at the purple checkmark next to his name. You squinted at the screen. “Is this him? In the profile picture with the LEDs in the background?” 

You glanced at your chat, chuckling as the viewers started spamming ‘yes’ and ‘oh my god it’s happening,’ and your personal favorite, ‘mom come pick me up the best crossover of 2020 is happening and im SCARED.’

“He plays a lot of Animal Crossing,” you observed, clicking on one of his videos and dragging the tab onto your main monitor so the stream could see it. You skipped through the beginning part, biting into a pretzel as you watched. 

“He’s kinda cute,” you commented, laughing as your stream freaked out once more. There were a few people commenting what looked like it could be a ship name though you ignored it. “Shame I’d never meet him, though.”

You paused his video, taking note of the time, before rolling out your shoulders. “I think it’s time for me to head out so I’m gonna end this stream with a huge thank you to you all for sticking with me through this entire stream and if you didn’t stay the entire time, I’m glad you decided to join in on the ride even halfway through. I’ll see you guys next time.”

You ended the stream, waving goodbye to your viewers before the light went out and you could relax the smile off your face. Don’t get it twisted, you loved streaming and you loved your viewers but just like any other job, it could get exhausting at times. You shut down your monitors, the screens turning blue before fading to black. You stretched, taking your phone up from its charger and launching yourself into bed, opening your phone and clicking on Twitter. 

Much like staying thirty minutes after you were done streaming to talk to viewers, you usually went on Twitter right after to answer questions and respond to DMs. This time, however, instead of opening the app to see a bunch of post-stream questions, your mentions were filled with the video clip of you saying, “He’s kinda cute,” as well as maybe a million people tagging both you and Damien in them. 

Well, shit. 

Soon enough, that was all that filled your timeline. You couldn’t move in one direction without running into another screencap of you admiring the man. God, you knew the consequences but something in the back of your mind was urging you to reach out to him.

After a few moments of contemplation, the lonely side of you won out, forcing you to message him against your better judgment. Without even thinking about it, you found his Twitter and sent this message:

Hey, I’m sorry about your mentions blowing up because of me tonight. My viewers recommended your Twitch to me and I spoke without thinking about it on Live. 

And with no expectation of his response, you fell asleep right there with your phone on your chest and the DM still open. 

You woke up the next morning with a sore neck and a dead phone, which was a terrible way to start your day. You rolled over, plugging your device into an outlet before crawling out of bed to start your day. When you weren’t streaming, you worked as a freelance editor for different YouTubers, helping their editors with their workload or even staying on as a Temp for different companies. Occasionally you edited the odd commercial here and there, but those gigs were rare. 

Most recently, you had received some material from a group of YouTubers, Smosh. This job was different, however, because if you did well on this you could be looking at a permanent place of employment through their parent company, Mythical Entertainment. 

You knew Mythical Entertainment, it was hard not to, especially since your aunt was one of the producers within the company, but tended to ignore everything the company did. The last you’d heard, they’d onboarded another YouTube group (which you did later find out to be Smosh, the same YouTubers whose video you were hired to edit). 

 After a quick shower and a half-assed attempt at a proper breakfast, you were ready to start your day. You situated yourself behind your monitors, opening the video clips that had been sent to you. The first was a sample video, something that gave you insight on what their editing style was actually like. 

But imagine your surprise when you’re staring down the same man you have called cute the night before, his approximately five-eleven stance taking up one-sixth of the space. He was standing next to a blond, who had been marked as “Shayne Topp.”

Despite there being five other people in frame, your eyes kept moving back to Damien’s figure, watching his mannerisms through the screen and laughing along to his jokes when they fell upon deaf ears. 

Your eyes slid over to your phone, now decently charged after sitting for so long. On your screen were dozens of notifications. There were maybe two from your mom, asking if you’d be coming home for dinner sometime that week but the majority came from Twitter. You picked up the device, unlocking and responding to your mom with a, “yes,” before opening Twitter. 

Nothing much had changed from the night prior. Your mentions were still being flooded with the video from last night but newer content had been ushered in, namely fan edits using footage from your streams and, you assumed, his. 

The only major difference, however, was the fact that Damien had responded to your DM from the night prior. The first message read: 

It’s really no problem! My stream had mentioned your name before, too.

Followed by the second:

P.S. I think you’re cute, too.

You couldn’t believe your eyes. Mr. Damien Haas, the man that you had made a thoughtless comment on stream about, also thought that you were cute. Suddenly, the fact that you had been staring at him for the past hour seemed less stalkerish and more like a blooming crush. You wrote back:

Aw, thanks! Have you seen the newer fan edits? They’re all so talented.

You cringed at yourself. A cute boy started talking to you and you’ve suddenly forgotten how to be suave, not that you really were in the first place. But still, you liked to think you had some tact when talking to people that you found attractive. 

Not even a moment later, there came a response. 

Yes, I have, he responded. And I agree! They are all very talented individuals. 

You looked from the monitor in front of you. You had about a quarter of the footage left to go through before you could start editing but this technically wasn’t due until the following night. Feeling emboldened by the fact that he had actually responded, you replied:

Are you going to TwitchCon on Friday? We should meet up or something. 

Anxiously you awaited his response, taking his silence as an opportunity to watch a bit more of the footage and take down notes according to the sample they’d given you. Roughly thirty minutes later is when the next response came in, reading as an affirmative to both questions. 

You didn’t respond, choosing to leave your social media for after you’d finished editing the video. Your heart still pounded, however. Just the thought that there was a possibility for the two of you to meet was, simply put, insane. You’d just heard of the guy the night before and decided that he was going to be your latest hyperfixation. 

But who could blame you? He was a nice, funny guy that showed the slightest bit of attraction towards you. It didn’t help that you were a sucker for guys that were nice to you. 

Fast forward to the Friday of TwitchCon, also known as the first day of TwitchCon. You and Damien had been talking steadily over Twitter DMs and just last night you had gained his phone number, giving you even more access to the man than you had before. But of course, who were you if you didn’t tease your fans with the prospect of you meeting. 

The night before, at the end of your stream, you’d given your fans the little tidbit of information that you and Damien were, in fact, planning on meeting up sometime during TwitchCon and would be greeting fans together for an hour at your booth. 

That sent Twitter into a frenzy, both of your combined fans getting your ship name to trend within the hour, which confused the hell out of a bunch of locals. 

It was nearing the time you and Damien had set to meet up. The plan was you’d meet around twelve for lunch, take an hour for yourselves, before going back to your booth and meeting with fans for an hour or so as promised. 

You had never been more nervous than you were in that moment. Not only were you about to meet your three-day-old crush but apparently a very popular YouTuber. You tried not to let the thought mess with your head. One of your friends, Wilbur Soot (who you played Minecraft with from time to time) was poking fun at you for being nervous about meeting a popular YouTuber. 

After three years of streaming and gaining a solid following, you’d think you’d be used to meeting other popular content creators. But because it was him, you found yourself unable to think straight. 

“What if I fuck up?” you asked Wilbur anxiously. He’d flown in from London for this event at your insistence and because you’d offered to pay half his airfare to get there and back. He didn’t have his own booth as his arrival was very last minute, but he didn’t mind. He signed the occasional poster though his main purpose was to provide you mental and emotional support. 

“You won’t fuck up,” he comforted, leafing through one of the comics a fan had given you. The entire thing was hand-drawn, which was an insane fact in itself. It looked professional, which was what blew you away when you’d received it. “Well, you won’t fuck up as badly as you did when you first met Schlatt.”

You groaned in embarrassment. “Don’t remind me.”

Long story short, you’d dumped a red in color slushy on the man accidentally after tripping over an unmarked cable. It really wasn’t your fault but the boys hadn’t let you live it down since then. 

Half a moment later, Wilbur was poking your side. “Is that him?” he asked, jabbing his pointer finger into your side while looking in the opposite direction. He was looking at a familiar figure walking down the hallway toward your booth. He stopped for a moment to take a photo with a fan, talking to them about something, before continuing on his way toward you. 

Your eyes locked and you gave him a smile while trying to beat Wilbur into no longer poking you. He stopped when you slapped his arm the first time, sticking his tongue at you before going on his phone. You rolled your eyes at his half-assed attempt of pretending he wasn’t about to start listening in on your conversation. 

“Hey, Y/n, right?” Damien asked as he approached. You nodded, reaching out for a handshake but becoming pleasantly surprised when he instead pulled you in for a hug. 

“You ready for lunch?” you asked glaring slightly at Wilbur as he made kissy faces over Damien’s shoulder. Luckily, Damien hadn’t noticed your moron of a best friend. 

“Yeah, I saw this sushi place on the way in if you wanted to try that?”

“I’d be down,” you agreed, reaching behind your table to grab your bag. Wilbur was set to meet with a few other Minecraft streamers, meaning you didn’t have to worry about him while you had lunch. You looked over your shoulder, making sure everything was set for you to leave before saying goodbye to Wilbur. 

Over the course of lunch, you and Damien had gotten to know each other pretty well. Once the conversation moved away from your fans and, well, work, and more into personal details, you found that you actually weren’t all that similar. For starters, Damien loved watching anime while your guilty pleasure was Gilmore Girls. The one show you both had a love for, however, was Avatar the Last Airbender, which made sense. 

Another thing was that he actually enjoyed being in front of the camera while you tolerated it on most days, really only putting on your face cam for the last thirty minutes on most days. Despite that, he still classified himself as an introvert. 

You returned back to your booth much later than you anticipated, thoroughly shocked at the line that had formed with Wilbur at the front of it, entertaining the fans that had shown up early to meet both you and Damien. 

“Y/n!” one fan called, pointing in your direction. Immediately, the entire line turned and gaped at the sight of you and Damien walking together. You greeted them happily, stopping for pictures and verbally promising that you’d stay until you got to meet everyone personally. 

“You really love your fans,” Damien observed as you put your things back down behind the table. Wilbur had set up shop on your right side, chatting with a few people at the front of the line. 

“I wouldn’t be anywhere without them,” you admitted, pulling a silver sharpie from your bag. You handed a gold one to Damien. “I also wouldn’t have gotten to meet you without them, which I’m still sorry about, by the way. Your feed must have been chaotic.”

“You have no idea,” he chuckled. “But everything happens for a reason.”

You nodded, grinning up at him. “Yes, they do.” 

Permanent

@beautiful-holland @toms-order @starlightfound @grandmascottlang @positiveparker @bippity-boppity-boopa @caswinchester2000 @andreasworlsboring101 @imladylunaticbitch​

[alwaysmychoices]

Contamination

Here is my Chapter 10 rewrite. I hope I did it justice.

Synopsis: When Charlie makes a chilling discovery about Senator Farrugia’s illness, lives are put at risk...

Chapter 16 of the “With and Without” series

Previous Series: “A Weekend with Dr. Ramsey”

Pairing: Dr. Ethan Ramsey x MC (Charlotte “Charlie” Greene)

Words: 4.7k

Rating: T (language)

That morning, the sun was bright. The world was good, and Charlie was happy.

Ethan woke her with a kiss and an offer of coffee, but she refused and bought a steaming cup from the coffee shop a block from the hospital. Before her shift began, she cozied up in Kyra’s hospital room, and together, they laughed like they didn’t fear it would be the last time.

“So, what did you get up to last night?” Kyra asked, eyeing Charlie’s latte with envy, “And if you tell me you watched Netflix from your bed, you need a better life.”

“I actually didn’t go home last night,” Charlie admitted cheekily, and to her delight, Kyra reacted with scandalized enthusiasm.

“You’re kidding?” Kyra leaned closer, eager for every little detail, “You have to tell me everything.”

Charlie would have – even who it was with – but she didn’t get the opportunity. Her gossip stood no chance against Bryce’s authority.

“It’s time,” he announced, knocking on the door belatedly with a solemn stare. He was smiling, but it was more resolved than happy. He was ready for surgery, not goodbye.

Charlie promised herself not to cry, so she hid her flash of concern in the act of straightening her white coat. Her eyes were sad as she took Kyra in, but she refused to say a word. Kyra was ready, and Charlie didn’t feel right adding any crack in her armor. She loved her friend enough to take a deep breath, smile, and hug her good luck.

“Give me all the sordid details tonight,” Kyra demanded.

“Every single one,” Charlie affirmed, “Even the parts you don’t want to know.”

This made Kyra laugh, and that was enough for Charlie to feel compelled to keep her promise.

As Charlie walked out of the hospital room, she came to Bryce’s side, and in all seriousness, she said, “Take care of her, Lahela.”

“If I mess up, the only person that will hate me more than you would be me,” Bryce gave a single, concerned glance in Kyra’s direction. It was the only one he allowed himself for the day, and once it was over, he assumed his bravado by adding, “Besides, look at me. I don’t even know how to make a mistake.”

Charlie rolled her eyes, but she felt safer with Kyra in his care. She wished them both a bit of final good luck and a goodbye, and then she walked out.

And as she walked away, despite everything, she felt light – like everything would be okay, like this story had a happy ending.

It was the last time she would feel that way for a long time.

Charlie started her shift with rounds and scheduled her patients so that she could squeeze in time to check on Kyra’s surgery from the observation room. She wasn’t even thinking of Senator Farrugia when Danny approached her.

There wasn’t much to think about. After Charlie discovered his lead poisoning, her most difficult patient was finally off the agenda. Instead of bothering the diagnostics team with questions or observations, he stayed in his hospital room, making calls, taking interviews, and answering emails. He was so busy trying to monopolize the publicity that his difficulty manifested in his refusal to follow his treatment plan if it didn’t suit his schedule for the day. Listening to him work made Charlie’s stomach churn. Every day he stayed in Edenbrook was another day that he exposed a new, corrupt facet to his personality. More than once, Charlie and Ethan stood outside his door, wondering if stealing him from Mass Kenmore was worth it.

“Charlie?” Danny approached her, a test result in his hand, “I have the results from Senator Farrugia’s paint samples. You marked them as urgent.”

Charlie briefly abandoned her charts to accept the results, but when she read them, her face twisted with confusion.

“Are you sure these are the right results?” Charlie asked distractedly, reading the paper over and over again as if it would change the contents.

“I double-checked,” Danny affirmed, wearing a matching look of bewilderment, “They’re right… I don’t know how, but those paint samples tested negative.”

That wasn’t the answer Charlie wanted, but she trusted Danny too much to doubt him.

If it wasn’t the paint, what could be poisoning Senator Farrugia?

Charlie thanked Danny. With a heavy sigh, she collected her charts and walked to the diagnostic’s office for further research.

So much for her break…

Charlie didn’t know where to start, so when she logged on to the computer, she ran a general search for the senator. She flagged anything about trips or notable habits, looking for any clue of contamination. Most of this information had already been studied during their preliminary search, but at that time, they weren’t looking for lead. Even under the new lens, she was able to throw out most of the news stories.

The further she went, the less clear it became.

Senator Farrugia lived in a new, high-end condo in D.C. The area had no reported lead problem, and the building was too new for lead paint or lead pipes. She had already called up all of his regular haunts in the capital, and none had any helpful information. His life in Massachusetts was limited to his office, his home, and the farmer’s market he frequented for publicity. None were insightful.

She searched the internet until Farrugia’s name had the title Mayor preceding it.

 Charlie stumbled on a story from a decade earlier, when 3 died from lead pipes poisoning the water supply. She made a note to test his pipes in his home, and she clicked on the article for more information.

That was when she saw the photo of 13-year-old Jonathan Perry. The young boy was smiling for his school picture, all braces and excitement. He was the youngest victim of the lead poisoning, and there was something eerily similar about his pale skin and thin features. And the name…

Perry.

Like Travis.

On a hunch, Charlie googled Jonathan Perry. There wasn’t much to find – his old social media page, which was full of messages of condolences after his death, a news story about his middle school soccer team’s victory at state, and an obituary. She clicked on the sparse obituary. In lieu of flowers, the family requested donations for the local children’s hospital. They also used the same school photo as the newspaper article used.

Charlie skimmed the article, making an effort to remain doubtful.

But she knew.

She knew before she even read the last sentence.

“Jonathan Perry is survived by his parents – Deborah and Samuel Perry – and an older brother, Travis.”

Charlie’s blood ran cold, and she read the sentence again.

The second the thought – the horrible, terrible suspicion – crept in, Charlie jumped up and rushed to the senator’s room.

Charlie spent years reliving these moments. All in all, it was ten minutes at most, but they were replayed so many times that each second was accounted for. Charlie found every “what if” until they each tortured her.

What if she hadn’t rushed in? What if she had waited? What if she called Ethan and asked him what to do?

What if she just let Senator Farrugia die?

Would her friends still be alive?

Would she still be haunted?

But on that day, at that moment, she had none of those thoughts.

She just needed to get to Travis before something terrible happened.

Outside of Senator Farrugia’s hospital room, she found Bobby Gunderson, the security guard, talking with Raf about his upcoming move to Brazil. They were happy. They wouldn’t be once she spoke to them.

“Have you seen the senator’s assistant? Travis?” Charlie interrupted their conversation frantically. She looked between them both for a reply, though Bobby was really the only one who knew Travis. He had been assigned to Senator Farrugia off and on for the last week, and his dislike for the senator was matched by his disinterest in Travis. He never laughed at Bobby’s jokes, and Bobby took that as a sign of flawed character.

Bobby, understandably, was the one to answer Charlie. He looked startled by her, and she began to wonder if her anxiety was visible.

How could it not be?

She was on her way to confront an attempted murderer. She wasn’t prepared for this. She was terrified of being too late but also facing him at all.

“He’s inside with the senator,” Bobby replied, hoping that he would get an explanation in return. She didn’t immediately offer one.

“The weasel-looking guy? He was acting weird,” Raf chimed in, equally concerned by Charlie’s strange demeanor. He knew her well enough to know that he had never seen her like this.

He’s inside.

Charlie’s heart rate accelerated. The blissful morning turned sour, and every passing second felt more serious, the consequences direr. The stakes were higher now. Charlie felt young and inexperienced as she tried to do all the right things.

Nothing prepared her for this. She suspected a man of poisoning her patient. This was a man she had known for weeks, one that she had commiserated with over long nights working on Farrugia’s case. He seemed friendly and helpful. Now, he was dangerous. And he was on the other side of the door, potentially close to another murder attempt.

The moment she heard that Travis was inside, she started walking to the door. Panic clouded her vision until all she saw was Travis and the senator and that door. Turning to Bobby, she said, “Bobby, we need to call the police for a suspected poisoning and attempted murder of a public official.”

Bobby’s face dropped, and wordlessly, he joined her as they barreled for Senator Farrugia’s door. He radioed the call in immediately.

As Charlie twisted the handle, she didn’t notice Raf walk in with them. For a long time, she wondered if she would have stopped him if she would have noticed, but she likely wouldn’t have. And even if she had told him to stay away, he wouldn’t have listened.

The hospital room was calm and quiet, save for Ed Farrugia’s typing on his keyboard. Danny was at the end of the bed, perusing Ed’s chart and making notes in the top corner. Travis was closer to the senator, standing right next to Ed’s bed as he fished through a backpack Charlie had never seen before.

Once the door opened, Charlie’s anxious energy flooded the room, and all three looked to the group in surprise. Everyone was looking at them, but Travis’s eyes stayed on Charlie.

“Dr. Greene?” Danny asked, confusion evident in his voice.

“What’s going on?” Farrugia echoed, pausing his typing.

Charlie didn’t look to either of them because she never dropped Travis’s stare. She watched realization dawn on him, and his brown eyes filled with understanding. He almost seemed to revel in it, like he wanted to stop hiding. Like a curtain falling to reveal the light, cruelty was exposed, and it made Charlie shiver.

At that moment, she had no doubts about Travis.

She knew he was guilty, and she knew he was dangerous.

“Mr. Perry, we would like to speak to you. If you come with us, we can resolve this quickly,” Bobby’s voice was authoritative now. It was a little intimidating, even. Travis didn’t flinch.

“Dr. Greene, are you sure?” he was still looking at Charlie.

She felt disgusted by his attention. He made the question seem intimate, like they were in on some big secret. Never had her name sounded so vile.

“Officer Gunderson asked you to step away from the senator, Travis,” Charlie was firm and her gaze resolved. Travis’s face hardened.

“Why?” Ed asked incredulously. He didn’t like being kept in the dark, and he certainly didn’t like the tension in the room. He had a virtual interview in fifteen minutes, and he didn’t need the distraction.

Travis knew that he had been discovered, so with unreserved harshness, he turned to his long-time boss and answered, “Probably because I’ve been poisoning you.”

As angry as he looked, Travis seemed relieved with his admission. Ed gasped and instinctively jolted away from his aide as he mumbled a weak, “W… what?”

Bobby moved towards Travis just as Ed decided to get away from him. While the senator scrambled out of his bed and hurried towards the door, Bobby held out his hand, expecting to apprehend the young man as he said, “Alright, come with me…”

Travis didn’t even look at Bobby. All he saw was Farrugia running for the door.

In a wild panic, Travis reached inside of his bag to retrieve a black canister, and he brandished it as a weapon, pointing it to each and every person in the room as he demanded, “STOP!”

Everyone obeyed.

They had never seen a canister like that, but the way Travis held it commanded fear and trepidation. It appeared sinister, even from across the room.

Travis looked at them all but mainly Ed as he screamed, “Stand back! I mean it!”

Farrugia, who had almost escaped before Travis’s threat, took one cautious step in the direction of his aide. He didn’t come too close because he wanted the option to run. With his hands up in a pleading gesture, Farrugia urged Travis, “Travis… think about what you’re doing. Please…”

“Think about what I’m doing?” Travis repeated with disbelief, “What do you think I’ve been doing for all these years? From the moment we met, I’ve only been thinking of this.”

Travis waved the canister in Ed’s direction, eyes growing hard as his finger curled around the trigger.

“Travis!” Charlie interrupted, startling him just enough that his grip on the trigger lessened.

She couldn’t hear her thoughts for her heartbeat. She hardly remembered how to speak, let alone what to say. Her eyes kept drifting back to the canister, which was still dangerously aimed in her direction. She felt it watch her, like it was preparing for something horrid.

She felt everyone watch her.

And as Travis granted her his attention, the pressure prickled at her skin.

“This won’t bring your brother back,” Charlie said gently.

“You think I don’t know that?” Travis scoffed, “I will never get my brother back. I’ve lived with that since I was fifteen, and that knowledge destroyed my family. It destroyed my parents, and it destroyed me.”

His finger was back on the trigger, his hand shaking with the concentration needed to keep from pulling it. One slip and they would all find out what made Travis so confident in his weapon.

“Travis, let’s talk about this,” Charlie begged, refusing to look at the canister and instead looking for some sliver of humanity left in her opponent. If she could just find the right words, she could end this.

She could save everyone in this room.

She truly believed she could. Charlie believed in the world. She believed that tragedy and pain had an end. She believed that happy endings could be found if you worked hard enough.

She believed she would walk out of that room traumatized but otherwise unscathed.

She was wrong.

“No,” Travis refused, almost laughing at her, “There’s nothing to talk about. If I leave this room, I’m going to jail, which will be the end of it. And Dr. Greene, you don’t know the details of this story, but I’ll tell you how it ends. Ed Farrugia doesn’t survive.”

Travis surveyed the hospital room. He eyed Farrugia, who was just waiting to be out of his line of sight so he could run. Then, he looked to the four bystanders who had wandered into his plan.

“It’s unfortunate that four others will have to die as well,” Travis mused.

“It doesn’t have to end this way,” Charlie was shaking. Something was breaking inside of her. Maybe it was hope that they could leave this room, or perhaps it was faith in all that was good in the world. She begged for his humanity, but it felt too distant. “Please, you don’t want to hurt us. You don’t even know us. Travis, we have nothing to do with this. And you know you’ll regret it. Please.”

Travis offered a sympathetic shake of the head, “Charlie, you didn’t have to do this. You could have let him die. You know who he is. You know what he does. You know that his policies kill people. Don’t you see that you’re complicit? Not just in what I’m doing but in what he does!” Travis frowned in disgust, “You could have stayed quiet!”

“I couldn’t do that,” Charlie managed, fear gripping her so tight that even small words were shaky and uncontrolled.

She had lost control of herself. She had lost him, too.

Travis shrugged, “I hope your conscience is enough for you, then.”

Everyone knew they were in a final hour, that whatever was coming was so close that it breathed down their neck.

That was why Bobby stepped forward.

“Dr. Greene is right,” Bobby asserted, “Come with me before anyone gets hurt.”

And this was what Charlie lived a thousand times over – until she recounted the sound of Bobby’s step on the linoleum towards Travis and the inhale of Rafael to her side as he held his breath. It was never any less painful to experience the moment before it all unraveled. At best, it was numb. Today though, it was blisteringly agonizing.

Bobby reached for Travis, but his grip wasn’t strong enough. Travis pulled free, and without a thought or a word, he pulled the trigger on the canister. An aerosol gas released in a puff in Bobby’s face. There was a horrible, aching strangling sound as Bobby fell to his knees. He coughed violently, choking on the gas and his own breath. He gargled and thrashed in pain until he was on his back.

Charlie moved towards Bobby, but Danny made it there first. Instinctively, he pressed his fingers to Danny’s artery in his neck. An oily sheen covered Bobby and spread to Danny’s hands.

“Charlie, he’s going into cardiac arrest!” Danny yelled, already beginning the chest compressions.

They didn’t have time, and they didn’t have the equipment. Charlie belatedly realized that she was screaming into the hall for equipment, but she never finished the sentence. She was running to Bobby when she came face to face with Travis, who wielded the canister in her direction. She froze, the words dying on her lips.

“At least I’m not the only one with blood on my hands,” Travis sneered, and he began to pull the trigger.

In the split second before the gas was released, Charlie couldn’t move. There wasn’t time to run, not that she really thought to. Her vision was clouded with tears, but she could see the barrel pointed at her. And for it was worth, she accepted her fate.

She didn’t want to die, but she knew she would.

And for her last thought, she wished she had told Ethan that she loved him.

It wasn’t her last thought, though.

“Ahh!” Charlie cried as she was shoved to the side. She fell to the floor in an uncoordinated heap, and she looked up just in time to see Raf tackle Travis to the ground. They landed with a heavy thud, and Raf scrambled for the canister.

What followed was blind panic.

Gas filled the room as they fought for the canister. It spilled out of their grasp, and spinning in the middle of the room, it coated everyone but Charlie with a layer of oil. Charlie coughed as it infiltrated her lungs, burning and stabbing as it went.

Danny frantically tried to resuscitate Bobby as Raf fought to subdue Travis. Charlie, coughing through the mist, caught Farrugia sprint out of the room and heard Travis scream in response. The scream was guttural and garbled, and it was the worst noise she had ever heard.

Clambering to sit up, Charlie looked around the chaos and tried to find the place to help, but she couldn’t. She was startled still, watching as everything fell apart.

“What was that?” Raf demanded, slamming Travis against the wall.

“I don’t know!” Travis pulled free, only to vomit into the trashcan. Raf raged until he was consumed with a cough.

Danny’s efforts to save Bobby grew weak as both Bobby’s situation grew worse and Danny’s strength gave out. Danny pulled his hands away, examining them, and he breathlessly expressed his horror, “My… my hands are covered… I’m-I’m covered.”

Charlie shielded her eyes from the sight, tears streaming down her face as she hid from the terror and distress of her dear friend.

Her gaze landed on the door, and she knew what she had to do. Crawling on the linoleum, Charlie’s back was to the plight, but she felt it every second. It consumed her. It cemented her and demanded everything until she could give nothing. She couldn’t feel it now. She engrossed herself with her mission and shoved her trauma and her pain and her fear and her guilt out of her mind.

Charlie reached the door just as Ethan could be seen in the window. He walked towards the room with the innocence of a man who didn’t yet know that the world was ending.

Charlie wanted to run to him. She wanted him to save her.

But instead, she slammed the door closed.

Ethan’s confusion settled into surprise and concern, and with each step, he felt it mount. By the time he reached the door, he was terrified. He watched Charlie’s face – stained red from tears and eyes bloodshot. She shook, and he saw her ragged breath as she struggled against a burning cough.

And he pulled on the door handle, but she was holding it shut.

His Charlie.

His Charlie is not okay.

He pulled on the door harder, demanding to be let inside. He had no reasonable thought, only a visceral instinct to protect her and save her from whatever horrors were inside.

“What is going on?” Ethan pulled even harder, but she focused all of her strength in holding that damn door shut, “Let me in, Charlie!”

“Shut down the wing,” Charlie ignored the pain in his eyes. She ignored the way he stared. She ignored that he loved her, and she pretended she didn’t love him to spare herself.

If she opened the gates now, she didn’t know what would come out, and she didn’t know if she could do what needed to be done.

“Charlotte!” he jiggled the handle desperately, banging his hand on the wooden door like it might give way if he tried hard enough.

“Travis has tried to kill the senator with an unknown gas. We have no idea what it is, but Farrugia escaped,” Charlie felt empty as she tried to stay calm. Calm meant ignoring everything, yet she cried. She hesitated, and she almost cracked. She almost fell into the pit and lost herself in the sorrow as she said, “Bobby went into cardiac arrest after getting a blast of it to his face. Danny and Raf have been sprayed with it, and I breathed it in.”

Ethan stopped jiggling the handle, his hand slack.

He didn’t want to understand.

He wanted to break the fucking door down.

“We can’t risk it getting out of this room,” Charlie hadn’t lessened her grip on the door handle. She wasn’t sure if she could. She was bonded to her station. It was all she could do to maintain control.

It was all she could do to try and save someone.

Because the someone didn’t get to be her, or Bobby, or Danny, or Raf.

But it could be Ethan. It could be anyone on this hall.

She had blood on her hands, but it stained less if she could help someone else.

Ethan’s world slipped through his fingers, but he watched her instead. Everything – nor rather nothing… it was gone.

And he ached. He burned. He suffered.

He couldn’t remember kissing her in bed this morning and slipping her out of his apartment before his dad woke. He couldn’t remember making dinner with her or wandering Boston with Charlie on his arm and Jenner on a leash.

He only saw her now. Crying. Sick. And pushing him away.

“You’re right,” Ethan whispered breathlessly and helplessly.

He was broken, and she couldn’t look.

A sob was building in her chest – a body-wracking, heartbreaking, life-changing sob. She swallowed it and fought the air to keep breathing.

In the room, Danny and Travis were vomiting. Raf comforted Danny and glared at Travis. Bobby, perfectly still, was alone now.

Charlie found an air vent, and in it, she found her next distraction. With her back still turned to Ethan, she pointed to the vent and said, “Raf, I need your help to seal that!”

She opened every cupboard until she found plastic and tape, and Raf found a pair of scissors for her to cut it to size. Raf offered her a boost, and he lifted her up to tape it off. Once he let her down, she came face to face with him, and to her surprise, she wanted to scream at him.

She couldn’t believe how fucking irresponsible he had been! What the fuck did he think he was doing endangering himself like that? Why did he have to save her? Why?

But Danny was wheezing, and Charlie didn’t yell at Raf.

Charlie fell to Danny’s side as he leaned back against the hospital bed. His face was ashen white, and every breath was labored and pained. He tried to speak, but the effort was too hard. He only managed to say, “I… I don’t feel…” He paused, and his head fell back.

“It’s okay, Danny,” she whispered and took his pulse. It was weak and slow.

A lump formed in Charlie’s throat, and she squeezed Danny’s hand as she repeated, “It’s okay, Danny.” He weekly squeezed her back.

Charlie had to look away. When she eyed Bobby, she was on the edge of collapse. She felt everything and nothing, and one felt dangerously close to consuming her. Yet, hesitantly, she crawled in his direction.

Before she even touched him, she knew she wouldn’t find a pulse.

That didn’t mean she wasn’t heartbroken when it wasn’t there.

Raf followed her, and after a diligent attempt to find Bobby’s pulse, he grimaced.

They sat in silence, too many words to say to even begin speaking. The finality and grief were palpable.

They hadn’t saved Bobby, and they never would.

Charlie covered her mouth with her hand, holding her breath until the world might make sense again. It never did, and she exhaled in defeat.

Her limbs felt heavy, like a thousand atrocities now sat on them.

She was convinced that the world would never seem the same.

And she wanted to cry, but she didn’t. She couldn’t yet. Maybe not ever.

“Did you get much on you?” Raf asked finally, his eyes still on Bobby.

“Not much,” Charlie answered. She didn’t ask about Raf because she knew he was covered. He was relieved she didn’t mention it.

Charlie looked back to the window, where Ethan was on the phone. Behind him, she could see patients and employees evacuate, and she tentatively met his gaze. Face twisted with sorrow, Charlie nodded solemnly in Bobby’s direction.

Ethan understood, and it knocked the wind of out him.

Bobby was a good man. A colleague and a friend.

And he had been exposed to the same thing Charlie had.

His rookie. His Charlie. No.

Ethan pulled the phone away from his ear, and approaching the glass, he announced that the CDC was on their way.

“You’ll be okay, Charlie,” he promised, and trying not to panic, he affirmed, “All three of you. You’ll be alright.”

He said it because it had to be true.

It had to be.

He couldn’t lose Charlie, not like this. She couldn’t leave him when he’d just found her. This kind of thing doesn’t happen. And it doesn’t happen to her. It doesn’t!

And it won’t. And it won’t hurt her!

Anyone else but her.

He didn’t care if it was the senator. He was sad if it was a colleague. He was pained if it was a friend.

But it wasn’t her.

He didn’t know how to breathe. He didn’t know how to talk. He knew how to work, and he knew he needed to save her. That had to be enough.

His darling, wonderful Charlie.

He told her that she would be alright because it had to be true.

But Charlie didn’t believe him.

note: I probably should have spent more time working on this chapter, but it came out in one emotional sitting so I decided to share it.

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[blackgirlempowermentbylahart]

Don't Get Caught Up | In this final passage, I’m going to talk about online dating websites, chat rooms, dating apps, sex trafficking, and MORE. | Let’s talk about online dating websites! If you’re thinking about giving it a try, I want you to be aware and safe. Keep in mind that just because you come across a profile with a handsome picture and a captivating about me section doesn’t make this guy a great catch. You hear all the time how some women lucked up and found their boyfriend or husband, but that’s not the case for everyone. Please be mindful that not all men on there are genuine. You have some men that try to scam women. You have some men that are secretly married claiming that they’re single. You have some men that are dating another woman, but they’re going through a rough patch and are trying to see what’s out there. You have some men that are predators. And you also have some men searching for women that they can pimp out. Also, please be mindful that fake profiles are VERY real. Anybody can sit behind a computer, search the computer, download attractive images, and write a great bio for themselves. Don’t be so easily flattered by what you see, because it can all be bogus. Until you speak with them on the phone or meet up with them in person… that’s if you feel comfortable enough to meet up, then you really don’t have a full picture of what this person is like. That’s why I strongly suggest that you not be in a rush! Take your time to feel him out over the phone before you meet him in person. And I’m not just talking about after one or two conversations, either. Remember: At the end of the day, he’s a stranger! Yes, he might come off as a great guy, but you just never know. Converse with him about various topics to get a good feel for who he is. I encourage you to be an attentive listener, too. People will often say things without realizing it. TIP! Really pay attention to what he likes to talk about? What do you hear? Be mindful not to overtalk… What I mean by this is don’t be so eager to overshare too soon. Again, you don’t know just yet who you’re dealing with. Not to scare you… but serial killers, rapists, stalkers, and all other sorts of whack jobs are on dating websites, too. Don’t be afraid to ask questions that are important to you. If they try to avoid your questions, get irritated with the questions that you’re asking, or if you detect any kind of attitude: Please do NOT ignore the signs. Meet up in a public place! Do not go to his home, nor should you invite him to your home for the first time meeting up. I don’t recommend that! Do not ignore your gut… Allow it to lead, guide, and PROTECT you. Please be mindful of all I’ve talked about when it comes to dating apps, too… The same goes! Let’s talk briefly about chat rooms! Many people of all ages log into chat rooms for all sorts of reasons… To make new friends, build relationships, to vent, and of course, you guessed it, predators are on here, too. So, with that being said, be mindful of what kind and how much information you’re giving out. People from all over the world create these accounts, so you don’t know who you’re really chatting with. You may think you’re talking to this really awesome guy but, in actuality, he’s nothing that he’s portraying online. And please listen to me carefully if you’re a young adult woman reading this book… I don’t care how cool some of these guys or girls may seem, keep in mind that you’re on the internet, and it’s filled with people that want nothing more than to manipulate. They come off as nice, fun, outgoing, down-to-earth, trustworthy, great listeners, and everything else under the sun; but at the end of the day, underneath it all, some people are VERY deceitful. Don’t be manipulated by giving out your address or other personal information, period! I know a lot of young adults go on here to vent and get things off of their chest, but again, you don’t really know who you’re venting to. You could be offering up too much information that’ll put you in a vulnerable position. If you’re chatting with somebody and they’re asking you detailed questions about yourself, your family, what school you go to, etc… STOP and think! If they ask you to sneak out and meet them, STOP and think! If they ask you to come to their home, but don’t let anybody else know… STOP and think! Being a young adult can be tough, but nothing will be worse than you never being seen or heard from again. Everybody online is NOT your friend. Let’s talk about sex trafficking! Young girls and women ALL over the world are forced into sex trafficking every day. Please don’t think that it could never happen to you, because it could. That’s why I’m writing this passage to help keep you safe and aware! There’s nothing wrong with going out having a good time, but if you enjoy going to clubs, bars, house parties, hanging out, etc… Keep in mind that everybody is NOT who they may seem to be. Even if your friends introduce you to somebody, don’t be so quick to take their word. Get to know people for yourself. Sex traffickers are EVERYWHERE… Both men and women. They blend in just like everybody else, because they are just like everybody else. They are fathers, mothers, husbands, wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts, cousins, students, coworkers, friends… And even people that hold very high positions. I know some of you are shocked to hear that women do this too, but they do. If you’re a runaway, you’re at-risk. If you’re in a group home or in the foster care system, you’re at-risk. If you’re a prostitute, you’re at-risk. If you have low self-esteem, you’re an easy target. They know you want to feel loved and wanted, so they’ll start the grooming process to gain your trust and respect. They know that most likely you’ve already suffered sexual, physical, and/or mental abuse. They know that a lot of girls and women have abandonment issues and no real support system. They know all of this! That’s why at first, they make you feel loved, special, and wanted, but it’s all a part of their plan. And please understand this… It doesn’t just happen to the kind of girls and women that I’ve mentioned above! It happens to girls and women that just somehow got caught up and didn’t see or pay attention to the signs. It could also happen to any girl or woman who’s going about their daily activities. The mall, school, movie theaters, and other popular establishments are easy hunting grounds, too. It doesn’t matter what kind of family you come from, the type of life you’ve lived, or the choices you did or didn’t make. You could become a victim as well. Sex trafficking doesn’t discriminate! Keep your eyes WIDE open… The internet is flooded with sex traffickers, too! It’s easy to hide behind a screen and search for their next victims. Again, don’t be so easily flattered! That “like” that you just got on your picture could be from a sex trafficker. That comment that just made you smile from ear to ear could be from a sex trafficker. That beautiful direct message that you just read could be from a sex trafficker. That friend request that you just accepted could be from a sex trafficker. That person you barely know who just invited you to a party could be a sex trafficker. That event that you’re SO excited to attend could be connected to a sex trafficker. That person that just followed you on all of your social media accounts could be a sex trafficker. The possibilities are endless! Be mindful of men who seem too good to be true. Be mindful of girls or women that try to lure you into doing things that just don’t seem right. Be careful when you’re out and about having a good time; NEVER drink something that you didn’t see being made or didn’t open yourself. Be mindful of males and females that promise you a better life by going off with them. In this day and time, it pays to be mindful of every damn thing! Sex trafficking is evil… No one should have to ever endure this kind of wickedness! I’m about to get graphic for a moment, but I need you to get it! I want you to understand the horrible things that people go through, and there’s nothing that they can do about once they’re taken. Note: Don’t forget that sex trafficking is a horrible thing that happens to boys and men as well, however, for the sake of consistency in this passage, I’ll be focusing on girls and women. Girls and women are being beaten, drugged, and tortured if they don’t comply or if they don’t meet their so-called quota. Their bodies are no longer their own! They are made to do any and everything with their bodies, all for their trafficker’s love for money and power. There is plenty of money to be made, and by any means necessary, those girls’ and women’s bodies will be used and abused over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. Their vagina, anus, and mouth are abused daily for other people’s pleasure. Could you imagine this being YOUR truth? Lured or taken away just to be abused daily. Your every move is controlled. Imagine the cries and screams of other girls and women. Imagine listening to other girls and women being tortured. Imagine your body feeling exhausted and tired, but you’re still forced to perform. Imagine being on your period and still being forced to do the unthinkable. Imagine your body being tattooed with a name, slogan, saying, and/or design to show that you are someone’s property. That’s a way of showing their ownership of you… You’re branded like slaves. What do you think they’ll do to your body should you overdose, die of natural causes, or they decided to kill you? They’d get rid of your body like you’re trash! Sex trafficking is real, and girls and women get lured, taken, or caught up all over the world. Please do your best to keep yourself safe! If you’re someone with young daughters, nieces, cousins, etc… Please talk to them about this, too… It’s imperative to educate them! Sex trafficking is a VERY lucrative business, so you will always have predators on the lookout for fresh girls and women. With that being said, pay attention! If something doesn’t feel right, believe what you’re feeling. Be protective of yourself like your life depends on it, because it does! Look after yourself! Educate yourself! Be vigilant for yourself! For the females reading this that may battling with low self-esteem, abuse issues, the feeling of emptiness, and yearning for love and attention… Don’t fall victim to these predators! You’ve been warned… No, they don’t really love you! No, they don’t really care for you! No, they’re NOT going to take care of you and give you a better life with all of the glitz and glam that they promised you! No, they’re NOT going to give you the world! No, they’re NOT going to help you get on your feet or get you an amazing job! The only traveling you’re going to be doing is to places where they can make money off of YOU. That’s right! Selling your body and doing whatever else they demand you to do. They will make all kinds of promises to get you to go off with them… DON’T DO IT… It’s a trap! I’m going to bring this passage to an end by saying, “Encourage yourself, believe in yourself, and LOVE yourself. Never doubt who you are.” No matter how hopeless you may be feeling, YOU matter. I encourage you to reach out for help instead of going off with pimps and sex traffickers. There’s nothing good in this for you. Please believe that YOU count. Search the internet for legitimate help for people in your circumstances; search for shelters, programs, and organizations in your area. Speak up, and let someone you trust know what’s going on and that you need help. There is help… don’t be afraid to utilize it. You don’t have to be embarrassed or ashamed. Just get the help that you need! There are people who genuinely care for you, and their passion is to help you. Living a street life does NOT have to be your reality… Fight for YOU. Written by Stephanie Lahart: Author & Poet | TIP! Share this post with other women and girls, too! Did you get value out of this passage? Buy my book: BEFORE YOU COMMIT. This is one of the passages from that book. Available on Amazon: eBook and Paperback. NOTE! I’m on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. Want to know more about me? Google my name.

[t0ngue-tech]

Up All Night

“Out of all the friends Seokjin made online, you were exceptionally precious to him for many reasons. One, you carried metal straws with you everywhere. Two, you both were majoring in the medical field. Lastly, to be frank, he liked you.”

↠ fluffy nonsense huhuhu, universityAU ↞

word count: 4.9k

↠ oneshot ↞

A/N: happy new year everyone! 2019 was a ROUGH year for me for so many reasons. i hope this new year will do me good. as a gift for the new year, here’s a little seokjin fic huhu. i hope your new years eve was a fun and safe one (im still hungover a little but im alive lmao) i also hope to put out more fics for you all to love! i love you guise so much! o and there’s a few maplestory references in this fic lol.

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Eatjean: I have no idea why it stopped working. I got this watch last week

Y0urnam3: i think you should just give it some TIME

y0urnam3: get it??????

Y0urnam3: cuz it’s a WATCH!!!

Seokjin slapped a hand over his mouth, but failed to stifle the broken laugh behind his hand. He ultimately released a squeaky laugh that almost had him in tears.

“SEOKJIN. I swear to--”

“Okay! Okay! I’ll log off, Yoongi. Relax.”

Besides studying for hours on end at his desk, Seokjin also spent hours playing an online game called Maplestory. He played for years and even if he was juggling his job, social life, and college, he always made time to play. Seokjin made a lot of friends all around the world through Maplestory and even a handful of his friends in college played. 

“Dude, you’ve been playing since 8:30. I have to solidify this lesson plan and I can’t concentrate with you laughing and slapping your desk every ten seconds.” Yoongi, Seokjin’s roommate, took his glasses off and rubbed his eyes.

“Sorry, but y/n has been busy with school and we haven’t played together for a while.” Seokjin explained.

Out of all the friends Seokjin made online, you were exceptionally precious to him for many reasons. One, you carried metal straws with you everywhere. Two, you both were majoring in the medical field. Lastly, to be frank, he liked you.

Seokjin met you online through the Monster Carnival Party Quest around four months ago. Being in the last room of the party quest meant having a larger party with characters that had buffs and skills that could be beneficial to the entire team. Seokjin’s party was in need of a healer and happened to choose you, a cleric, to join the party.

For five rounds, Seokjin’s party dominated the party quest and when everyone came to the mutual decision to call it quits, everyone sent each other a buddy request and it all started off from there.

For the next few days, Seokjin found himself logging on around the same time you were online and the two of you spent time farming for mesos, helping each other out with quests, or doing rooms three and four in CPQ because the rooms only required a two-person party. This allowed you two to chat for hours, getting to know each other little by little. Of course, you both took precautions because it was the online world, anyone could be behind their screens and pretend to be someone they weren’t.

After almost a month of chatting as much as possible, you eventually began to trust Seokjin with more personal details of your life. You opened up by venting to him about how your ex-best friend decided to hook up with your newly broken up with ex-boyfriend. Seokjin easily related with you with the same story however, his story happened in high school and he found out himself because he found one of his ex-girlfriend’s blouses in his ex-best friend’s room. Seokjin understood your pain and became an emotional sounding board for you.

Even if Seokjin was your listening ear, the only other information that was shared was each other’s names and major. Honestly, Seokjin was curious about what you looked like, what your voice sounded like, but those things were privileged information that couldn’t be shared that easily. Looking each other up online probably wouldn’t be much help either because there could be a lot of people who had the same names and there would be no way to figure out for sure who was really you and vise versa.

No matter how curious he was, Seokjin respected your privacy and didn’t want to ruin the friendship he had with you.

“You make like you haven’t spoken to her in years.” Yoongi quipped as he typed away at his laptop.

“Just do your lesson plan, Mr. Teacher’s Assistant.” Seokjin laughed and launched a paper ball towards Yoongi’s direction. “I’m packing it in anyways. Y/n has an early class tomorrow.”

↠↞

There were multiple places you could’ve been and your 8 am class was definitely not your first choice.

Your professor for medical terminology had an optional 8 am course which you stupidly decided to attend. It wasn’t because you were failing, your future wouldn’t allow for that. Focusing and studying hasn’t been in your mind for a few days and you needed a refresher.

“Y/n, tell me, why am I even here right now?” Irene dropped her folder on top of the desk next to you and groaned. “I swear my bed was caressing me and begging me to stay.”

You yawned and tapped her desk. “Trust me. I also almost pressed snooze on my alarm but you promised you’d go with me and a promise is a promise.”

“Yeah, yeah, and you promised you were going to treat me to breakfast after this soooo…”

Fifteen minutes felt like four days. Your professor stood at the front of the class rambling on, clicking through his slides while everyone stared back at him with hollow eyes.

You glanced over at Irene who had half-lidded eyes and lazily swung her pen in between her fingers. She was probably daydreaming about the french toast and hot coffee from the diner across campus.

You found yourself doodling in the corner of your notebook with rough sketches of orange mushrooms, slimes, and a family of snails. The corner of your paper was starting to look like a miniature version of Henesys hunting grounds.

Forty-five minutes dragged on by and your professor finally let the class go. You and Irene both had a 10 am class which was why you promised her breakfast; to pass time and to have girl time.

“Are you sure I can order the french toast and waffles? We’re both broke ass college students, you know.” Irene handed her menu to the waitress and smiled.

“Yeah, yeah. It’s fine. We haven’t hung out in a while, so it’s okay.” You assured her.

“That’s because you’re always playing Maplestory.”

Irene wasn’t wrong.

You didn’t mean to spend the majority of your free time cooped up at your desk with your eyes glued to the colorful images on your laptop screen. Some days your logged on to bust ass and level up, but other days you actually waited to see if Seokjin was going to log on as well.

“So, anything new with that Seokjin guy?” Irene sipped her coffee. “Did you ask for each other’s social media yet?”

The answer will always be no.

“I told you, Irene. There’s something about the ‘not-knowing’. Plus, it’s a mutual agreement between us.” You explained for the thousandth time.

“Yeah, but what if he’s a creepy dude trying to hit on you!”

Of course you thought of that, which was also a hidden reason as to you why you didn’t expose too much personal information about yourself. Seokjin only knew your first name, your major in college, and you were sure to change the names of any personal stories that your shared with him.

You made sure to be careful. Always.

“Seokjin has been catfished before on Maplestory and he said it was so embarrassing and painful that he never wishes anything like that one anyone.” This was a story that Seokjin hesitated to tell because of how embarrassing it was, but he knew he had to tell you because he didn’t want you to get the wrong idea about him. This was his way of showing you that he trusted you.

“Well, alright y/n. You’re a smart girl, don’t forget that.”

Classes seemed to fly by after breakfast and after a draining study group, you were eager to have some quality time with yourself.

When you fully logged into your Maplestory account, Seokjin was quick to greet you in the text box.

Eatjean: Y/n!!!!

Eatjean: How was class?

You smiled stupidly at your laptop screen.

Y0urnam3: seokjinnnnnn! classes were just as annoying as yesterday

Yournam3: my energy is at 5% right now

Eatjean: I think it’s bedtime for you

A pout formed.

Y0urnam3: nooooo i waited all day to talk to you

Your feelings for Seokjin wasn’t exactly subtle. You weren’t shy to type out things like “I love talking with you” and “I missed you, sorry I couldn’t play yesterday”. It took a lot of courage for you to do so, but you were sure the courage came from not knowing Seokjin face-to-face. If you were to see him in person after saying all of those things, there was no doubt you would shrivel up into an embarrassed raisin.

Seokjin took a little longer to reply than usual. Instead of seeing his screen name, a spam of a character selling a level 200 weapon for warriors filled the chat box instead. Maybe this was a sign that you needed to stop being so forward with him.

/

“Awww, okay then stay uwu.”

Seokjin scrambled around a blocked his screen with his hands. He whipped his head to the side and found Yoongi peering over his shoulder.

“Y-Yoongi, when did you get back?” Seokjin stammered.

“Just now. Aren’t you going to press enter?” Yoongi stepped away from Seokjin’s breathing space and took a seat on his own bed. “And what the hell is an uwu?”

“It’s a way to express, uh, extreme ador--no, just google it!” He learned the phrase from you a few weeks ago and at first, he was just as confused as Yoongi was.

Seokjin took another quick glance at Yoongi who was struggling to kick his converse off his feet and hit the “enter” key on his laptop. 

Within minutes, you replied.

Y0urnam3: OMG YOURE USING UWU ALJDFLKDJ

Eatjean: MY FIRST AND ONLY TIME

Y0urnam3: UWUWUWUWUWUWUWUWUWU

Y0urnam3: btw can you help me farm for some mesos? I still can’t believe i got scammed yesterday

Seokjin didn’t do anything to hide the smile on his face. Why was the word “uwu” so amusing to him? It was probably because it made you seem a lot cuter than what he originally thought.

In the next hour, Seokjin met up with you help you gain back the mesos you lost. After everything, the two of you circled back to Henesys and stood at a random spot in an empty channel.

Eatjean: Brb ya boi needs a snack lol

He stood up from his chair and retreated to a small table in the room that he and Yoongi dubbed as the snack corner.

“Still playing?” Yoongi asked from behind his laptop screen.

“Yeah. We’re waiting for a few friends so we can LPQ.” Seokjin ripped open a bag of sweet corn balls, sending a few flying to the floor. Just as he bent down to pick up the pieces, he caught Yoongi’s eyes staring at him. “What?”

“I have literally no idea what you just said, but go off I guess.” Yoongi went back to typing away on his laptop. “Oh yeah, before I forget, you’re coming this weekend right?”

Seokjin took a quick second to think about what plans he possibly had this weekend, but nothing came to mind.

“What’s happening this weekend?”

“Dude, Jimin’s party? Penthouse in the city?”

It finally clicked in his brain that Jimin’s uncle lent Jimin his penthouse for the weekend as an early birthday present. Seokjin was invited last week along with Yoongi and they were given strict instructions by Jimin to clear their schedule for Saturday night.

Was it selfish for Seokjin to want to stay back at his dorm and talk to you all night? There was no doubt that Yoongi would agree to go because he has been complaining the entire week about “needing a fucking drink because fuck this lesson plan”. With Yoongi gone for that evening, that meant Seokjin could laugh to his heart’s content all by himself.

“I--” Seokjin dragged on. “I don’t know. I might just stay here and relax.”

“Relax my ass.” Yoongi said in a joking tone. “Seokjin, you’re going. It’s just one night out. Y/n is not going to disappear all of a sudden.”

Of course Yoongi was right. It was just one night off campus and having a drink with his friends was a plan that was long overdue. But Seokjin liked you too much, so it was normal to want to talk to you as much as possible.

Seokjin sighed quietly. An unnecessary battle between the two choices flooded his mind. Going to the party was obviously the answer that settled at the tip of his tongue.

But y/n… ugh but Jimin...

“Fine, okay. I’ll go, I’ll go.” Seokjin lifted his hands in the air in defeat. 

There was no point in telling you about the party because just as Yoongi mentioned, you weren’t going to disappear into thin air. Plus, Seokjin wasn’t your boyfriend. He had no business in telling you every single thing that he was going to be doing.

Eatjean: Okay, back

Eatjean: Sorry my roommate was just telling me about his day

Seokjin waited a few minutes before receiving your reply.

Y0urnam3: ohhhhh this is the teacher’s assistant right?

Y0urnam3: how was his day?

Y0urnam3: and how was yours too!! i forgot to ask lol

He smiled and danced his fingers along his keyboard.

Eatjean: That’s the one! And he’s in desperate need for a drink

Eatjean: My day was alright. We’re already preparing for midterms so that’s a bummer

After hitting “enter”, Seokjin pressed the F4 button on his keyboard making his character have a crying facial expression.

Talking to you was always easy. He never felt the need to force a conversation with you because you both shared the same interests and had an understanding school schedule. If there was a chance where he could meet you in person, he was so sure that it would also be just as easy.

For the next two hours, Seokjin aided you in farming for mesos until the party was full to complete a few rounds of the party quest. Even if his eyes may have gotten dry and his back was tight, he enjoyed the time he spent with you.

Y0urnam3: okay seokjin it is LATE and ya girl needs to sleep

Seokjin frowned.

Eatjean: Already T__T

Y0urnam3: i know in sory

Y0urnam3: im sorry****

Y0urnam3: ive been keeping all school related stuff on the back burner and i need to get accepted into the nursing program i told u about

“Ah..right.” Seokjin muttered to himself.

Eatjean: OH OF COURSE OF COURSE

Eatjean: Pls focus on school too!! Trying to become a cardiologist isnt a walk in the park either so i understand

Eatjean: Study hard and get some rest y/n

After receiving your reply filled with words of encouragement for Seokjin to also study hard, he finally shut off his laptop and flopped onto his bed. Since school was a huge priority for you, this probably meant you were going to spend more time hitting the books and using your computer for actual research purposes.

“If only we had each other’s instagram handles or something.” Seokjin groaned and waited for a response from Yoongi.

The room stayed silent and when he turned around, Yoongi was sitting in his chair with his head tilted backwards and had a red pen tucked behind his ear. His desk was cluttered with debris of papers and his laptop was wide open with what seemed to be an answer key.

Seokjin stared at his sleeping friend for a while. “Yeah. He needs a fucking drink.”

↠↞

“Okay, bitches. Clear your schedules. We are going to get crazy tomorrow..” A mutual friend of you and Irene, Seulgi, dropped her binder and textbook on top of the table where you and Irene were studying.

“Crazy?” Irene questioned. “Really?”

Seulgi dropped herself into the seat next to you and sighed. “No, I’m kidding. I just wanted to invite you guys to my dorm tomorrow to have a study session and a few glasses of wine.”

“Ugh. I’m in. I have been crazed this whole week and I need the alcohol.” You shut your textbook and rubbed your temples.

“Are you sure? You’re not going to isolate yourself and play Maplestory—and I mean that in the nicest way possible.” Irene reached over and clasped your hands with hers.

You laughed knowing there may have been notes of bitterness in her words. “Yes honey, I’m sure. Both Seokjin and I have mountains of work that we’ve been putting off so I don’t know when’s the next time we’re going to be online together.”

Seulgi raised her eyebrows and leaned closer to your shoulder. “And how is it going with Mr. Eatjean? Are you two going to get married in Amoria yet?”

You snorted and gently pushed Seulgi’s head away from your breathing space. To your surprise, Irene laughed along understanding what Seulgi was talking about; she never played the game but you talked about it so much with her that she caught on some of the terminology that was used.

Unfortunately, what you said was the truth. You haven’t been able to play Maplestory in a while and you really missed talking to Seokjin. It wasn’t easy being in the medical field, but you had to give your future career some of your attention at some point.

When Seulgi invited you two over for a study session, you imagined having a few glasses of wine while listening to jazz and getting a lot of work done. However, none of that happened.

Just when the three of you were settled in Seulgi’s room, almost ready to pull out the wine cork, Seulgi receives a very delightful phone call from a friend. Next thing you knew, you were carefully applying lip gloss in the backseat of an uber and Irene was racking her brain over whether or not she wanted to unbutton the first three buttons of her top.

“Ugh, just do it already! Jihyo is going to be there tonight that’s why!” Seulgi gently tugged on Irene’s hand who was holding onto yours. “And y/n, stop pulling the skirt down. That skirt was meant to be that short.”

“I know, but oh my God, the exposure!” You tugged at the end of the black pencil skirt Seulgi let you borrow.

“Sooyoung, should’ve let us know ahead of time about these plans.” Irene complained.

“At least this is way better than studying—hey, Sooyoung!” Seulgi called out.

Sooyoung met the three of you at the elevator and hastily rushed you all down the long hallway that was filled with gorgeous college students. You all entered a doorway that was also filled with students who were either already wasted or making their way towards that level. Some of the students were familiar to you and others were definite strangers; Sooyoung seemed to know most of them.

“Girl, where is your brother anyway? We have to at least greet him happy birthday first.” Irene tippy toed to get a good look of the people in the kitchen.

“He’s in here somewhere. Let’s just find him later.” Sooyoung began pouring vodka into shot cups while you poured sprite into four other cups.

“You know, I keep forgetting you have a brother.” You spoke over the mixed sounds of music and voices of people. “Why don’t you two just go to the same university?”

“Well, you know how it is. Siblings, different majors, scholarships, blah blah blah.” Sooyoung brushed passed the subject and handed out the shots and chasers. “Come on, you girls need to catch up, especially Irene because Jihyo looks hot as fuck tonight—to Jihyo!”

Sooyoung raised her shot cup and while you and Seulgi complied with the cheer, Irene begged you all to tune it down. Although she did mutter, to Jihyo, before gulping down her vodka.

You, Seulgi, and Sooyoung were huddled in one part of the living room to keep an eye on Irene who seemed to be a bit more confident in talking to her crush; all thanks to some liquid courage.

The entire floor was covered with people making it almost impossible to not bump into anyone.

“Oh! Sorry!” You yelled over music. “This place is so boujee! If I ever lived here, I would never leave.”

Seulgi laughed and nudged your shoulder. “Penthouse or not, you never leave your dorm anyway!”

“Ooh! Is it because of that game you’re playing? How is that dude-guy anyway?” Sooyoung slurred.

You scrunch your nose and helped your drunk friend sit down on a nearby chair. “How much did you drink before we arrive?”

Sooyoung gently tugged on your pencil skirt. “Answer me question. When are you and denim jeans getting married in Amoria?”

Seulgi threw a fit of laughter as she explained to Sooyoung that she said the exact same thing.

“We are not getting married in Amoria. We’re not even in a relationship.” You squished Sooyoung’s cheeks with one hand and took a sip from your mixed drink.

“But why not? It seems like you and sack-jeans are into each other. I say, date!” Sooyoung waved her red cup in the air and you and Seulgi did your best to calm her down. A drunk Sooyoung was something else.

“Honey, you need to relax. It’s only eight in the evening and for your information, his name is Seokjin and we’re just Maplestory buddies right now. We don’t even know what each other looks like.” You stroked Sooyoung’s hair and took another sip of your drink.

“Y/n, just listen to the poor girl and date him!” Seulgi let out a high pitch snicker and gave Sooyoung a high five.

Talking about Seokjin was definitely bringing your mood down. Maybe it was the alcohol messing with your emotions for than usual, but you really missed talking with him.

“Y-Y/n?”

You felt a tap on your shoulder and you spun around, making eye contact with one of the cutest guys you ever laid your eyes on. He wore a red t-shirt that hugged his broad shoulders and had jet black hair that was styled upward. If his eyes didn't catch your attention, his lips sure did. The only thing wrong with him was that he knew your name and you didn’t recognize him at all.

“Um and you are?” You questioned, readying yourself to perform some sort of self-defense.

“It’s me.” He gestured to himself. “Seokjin.”

↠↞

Seokjin weaved himself around the kitchen, trying to find a bottle of Grey Goose to refill his drink.

“Damnit, Jimin. How many people do you know?!” Seokjin grunted. “Oh, Joy! Pass me the bottle when you’re done.”

The already-drunk-sister of his friend gave him a thumbs up before filling up the last shot cup and slid the bottle down the counter. Seokjin tried to thank her, but her focus was immediately back to her friends.

“Dude, where’d you go?!” Yoongi bumped into Seokjin, almost making him spill his drink.

“Okay, I know you need this wild ass night, but please relax. This is my favorite shirt. It accents my shoulders.” Seokjin grabbed his friend’s cup to give him a refill.

“Hurry. Namjoon is freestyling in the living room and it’s fucking fire.” Yoongi nudged Seokjin’s arm to make him lead the way into the living room.

Seokjin was more than supportive of his friend’s desire to drink his stress away, but having to deal with Yoongi’s drunk ass plus a few more of his friends was making him wish he was back at his dorm, double clicking the Maplestory icon. But he had to admit, Namjoon was spitting bars.

“Oh! Sorry!”

Seokjin turned around to find one of his friends stumbling over, almost knocking down a group of girls.

“Good grief, Sandeul. Sit here, please.” Seokjin gently forced his friend to sit down on the couch in front of him.

Just a few more hours, Seokjin. Just hold out for a few more hours, then you can drag Yoongi back to the dorm.

“-getting married in Amoria?”

Seokjin chuckled. I guess there are other Maplestory players here.

He didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but he was trying to catch wind of the conversation behind him. However, the music and crowd was too loud to hear most of the conversation.

“-and for your information, his name is Seokjin and we’re just Maplestory buddies for now.”

“Y/n, just listen—”

Huh, Seokjin. That’s my name too- WAIT.

Taking the heavy risk of appearing as a creeper, Seokjin turned around and tapped the girl behind him.

Here goes.

“Y-Y/n?”

When she turned around, Seokjin was blessed to see the cutest girl he has ever seen.

“Um and you are?”

Seokjin braced himself and pointed to his chest. “It’s me. Seokjin.”

You widen your eyes and Seokjin could tell you weren’t as convinced.

“U-uh, it’s really me. Eatjean? I just helped you farm for more mesos because you were scammed the day before.” Seokjin’s heart was thundering in his chest. The alcohol could’ve also played a role in that, but it was also because he was extremely nervous that the girl right before his eyes was actually a different person.

“Oh my God. Oh my God.” You repeated. “Oh my God, you’re really Seokjin!”

The nervousness was slowly exiting his body once he saw the smile that grew on your face. Thank heavens, it was really you.

“Y-Yeah. It’s me! Wow, I just—I’m—w-wow.” Those words were the only ones that Seokjin could muster.

You let out a snicker and tucked a few strands of hair behind your ear. “I can’t believe—”

“Seokjin?! This is denim jeans?! Date her!” Sooyoung suddenly gripped your shoulders.

“Excuse her. Sooyoung get your shit together for a second please—” Seulgi tugged at Sooyoung to leave you two alone. “Continue!”

Seokjin chuckled and looked over his shoulder to check on his friends who were still invested in freestyling. He then took you by the hand to stand in one part of the living room that had a little less people.

“You’re friends with Jimin’s sister?” Seokjin questioned.

“Yeah! We go to the same university. Why the hell hasn’t she mentioned you to me before?” You sighed sadly.

“I’m actually closer to Jimin.” He explained. “I even forget that her real name is Sooyoung. Jimin only refers to her as ‘Joy.’”

You took a sip out of your drink and nodded your head. “What a small ass world.”

Seokjin stuffed his hand in his pocket and leaned in closer to you. “You wanna get out of here?”

↠↞

“I told you to not use the scroll! It only had a fifty percent success rate.” You shook Seokjin by the shoulders who was devastated by the choice he made.

At first, you were feeling hints of regret after quickly accepting Seokjin’s invitation because you didn’t know what his intentions were. But he was just as quick to assure you that he wanted to bring you to his dorm to have some pizza and help him with his character’s accessories.

Seokjin was the perfect gentleman, just as you imagined. He gave you some of his clothes to change into so you were comfortable, he even stepped out of his dorm so you could have privacy. He let you sit in his gaming chair while he took a random stool from inside the dorm. When the pizza arrived, he remembered how much you loved pizza crust so he gave you every single one from each slice he took.

If you knew this was the type of guy Seokjin was, you would’ve gave him your instagram a long time ago.

“Hey, cut me some slack. I took a huge risk here.” Seokjin spun you around in his chair. “And I remember a certain someone who spent almost nine hundred thousand mesos on a staff she ended up not needing.”

“Fine, fine. Touche.” You scoffed and jokingly threatened to leave his dorm.

You scanned Seokjin’s desk and saw nothing but textbooks, what seemed to be study guides, and a few empty coffee cups. Being under the same university major umbrella, you understood the mess all too well.

“How’s your studying going?” You asked, tidying up some of his papers.

“Ehhh. I put the dying in studying.” Seokjin joked and you playfully hit his shoulder. “I’ve been up all night for the past few days.”

“Awww, you poor baby.” You ran your fingers through his hair and his eyelids fluttered closed at your touch. “Well, I guess it’s sort of no different from when you’re playing Maplestory with me.”

“Hmmm, I beg to differ. I actually enjoy spending time with you online.” Seokjin sighed happily. “And maybe I can enjoy spending time with you in person this time around?”

You laughed and brought your hands to your face to hide the blush he caused. “Ohhhhh, very smooth, Seokjin.”

“Do you accept this quest?”

You studied Seokjin’s facial features on more time; his big eyes and pouty lips. After knowing each other through an online game, it was only right for you to finally get to know the real Seokjin. 

From what you already knew, he was a sweet man who enjoyed trying new food, doing word search puzzles, and taking every opportunity presented to him to make some sort of pun. He could be a bit cheesy and a bit dorky, but it was all endearing. And because of all the time you’ve spent reading his cheesy lines through your laptop screen, the next words that came out of your mouth was just as cheesy and dorky, but it fit the moment.

“Quest accepted.”

-

-

-

♡ rae jagi

[thezestywalru]

Hidden behind a screen

Marinette cried frustrated tears into her pillows as she wondered why. Why didn’t they believe her? Why wouldn’t he help her? Why couldn’t she stand up for herself? 

“It’s not that bad, Marinette!” said Tikki, quite unhelpfully.

But Marinette ignored her, and ran down to her computer, typing out a furious email to her former best friend. She had no intentions of sending it, of course, but she couldn’t keep the emotions bottled in.

Remembering the villain that had played Paris for these last few years, she quickly decided to calm herself. Maybe talking to someone would help.

Marinette quickly logged online, surveying different chat rooms on various websites to see if one could help her. They didn’t need to know her name, but she needed advice. She needed an outsiders perspective.

Surprisingly fast, just a mere 20 minutes later, she received a DM in her inbox. It was from a kind stranger, assuring her that she had done no wrong. They offered her help, advice. All she had to do was type out a reply and talk to them.

Marinette hesitated, looking back at the sleeping red kwami. What would ladybug do in the situation? On one hand, her parents had always warned her never to talk to people online but she didn’t know. All of her social medias were private, excluding the one that she used for her designing.

With a gulp, she decided to take a leap and replied quickly. Marinette introduced herself as M. The stranger seemed nice. He introduced themselves as Jake. Though he provided no age, Marinette surmised through the different Internet lingo and slang that he used that Jake was about her age. He said he was 16, just like her. 

She checked his profile. It was fairly empty, only comments on different posts were written, offering kind words and solid advice. There are a few photos as well, each for portraying the same teenage boy with red hair and pale freckled skin. 

Though she was cautious at first, Jake quickly became Marinette’s only confidant. She told him nearly everything, often texting him during class to calm herself down as Lila squirmed her way out of tricky situations, and the class wouldn’t listen to her.

He told her all about his pet dog, TJ, who was a miniature poodle. He lived in London, just over the channel. He showed her a photo of the birthmark on his hand, which was shaped like a sleeping cat. “Just to prove that I’m real.” He joked. 

She asked him about the sites, which he willingly explained. This inspired a whole new line of her fashion, each modeled for the different monuments around the world.

He seemed perfect; almost like her dream guy, her soulmate. He wanted three kids as well and he didn’t mind hamsters. So, she told her dream guy her full name, her life and everything about her.

She wished she had someone she could talk to about Jake, someone she could gushed you about her newfound crush. The posters and schedule of Adrien were quickly removed.

So, Ladybug excitedly told Chat Noir about the new guy she was talking to. He didn’t take it very well. Flummoxed, she asked why he wasn’t happy for her. He confessed his love, once again, to which she responded that she only saw him as a friend.

Finally, two months after they had started talking, Jake finally asked her to be his girlfriend. She excitedly accepted. He promised to fly over for Valentine’s Day, so they could meet in person. She only had to wait four months. He gave her his number, which she began texting.

Soon, the questions begin. He asked her for photos, something to prove to his friends that he supposedly had a girlfriend. “They didn’t believe me,” he said. “They said you’re fake,” he said. So she sent him a photo of her that Alya had taken just months before, her in front of the Eiffel tower eating some of Audreys ice cream. It was a pretty photo, and she was quite proud of it.

“No,” he said. ”That’s not the kind of photo I want.” So, she took them. Shamefully. Because if she didn’t love him, why wouldn’t she do it? those were his words. They stung. It was her first relationship, but he assured her this was normal.

Instead of complaining or refusing because she wanted to keep her only friend, Marinette instead asked for photos of him to show to others. In reply, Jake sent the same photos from his profile, the two photos of the freckled ginger boy grinning at the camera.

“No,” She said. ”New photos.”

“These are new.” He replied. His original profile had been deleted. “By the company,” he said. She believed him, like a fool.

The questions began once more: requests for new photos, and strangely, threats. He wanted videos too.

“A video of what?” She didn’t really want to know.  His answer sickened her, but he said he wouldn’t come to Valentine’s Day in Paris if she didn’t send it. Her classmates already been doubting that she found a boyfriend, so she reluctantly sent it along. 

They continued talking, though now it was mostly requests for new photos and refusals to reciprocate. Come Valentine’s Day, when he didn’t show up to their meeting place and brushed it off with an excuse that the weather in England was bad (from her experience, the weather in England was almost always bad) she decided she had to cut him off.

The reply from her sweet Jake that she had given her heart to surprised her.

“I have your phone number, you stupid bitch. Do you think I won’t be able to find your address? You already gave it to me, including your last name. I know your parents are bakers. I know where to find you. I know where you sleep.” Scared now, she blocked his number.

She blocked him on all social media, not that he had many. She was beginning to suspect now that Jake wasn’t who he said he was. She looked up photos of miniature poodles, finding the picture that he claimed was of his dog in the first ten. The photos he had taken around London were merely grabbed off of the internet. 

She reached out to Alya, who merely scolded her about trusting Internet strangers, believing Lila that this was just an attention grabber from Marinette. After all, her boyfriend hadn’t been real, had he?

She went to Adrien after the first threatening text from an unknown number appeared, with just a photo, the photo that she had taken. He offered no advice, merrily telling her to ignore it.

So, she did. Stupidly, naïvely. The video showed up on her public fashion design’s Instagram. Shock rippled around the gossip sites. She tried to take it down, but it had already been downloaded by many people. It was quickly spread around the internet, with various people calling her out. She deleted her instagram. The source was unknown, so she couldn’t sue whoever it was. Her parents were ashamed; furious that she had trusted this boy.

The next video was merely an explicit of some guy jerking off to a photo of her. It was clearly not a teenage boy. it came from the same account. Jake.

Her future was ruined. Each time someone searched up her name, the photos would appear. She was ridiculed at school, even more so. They called her a slut, a whore. So, even though her parents couldn’t move their bakery, they offered to let her transfer schools to somewhere else in Paris when the year ended. She accepted.

The new school was fine, at first. She made a few friends. Soon the video made its appearance again, and everything was ruined. Her old classmates slandered her online, taking no mercy. They now ignored her. She wasn’t sure what she preferred. 

Who was he? Why was he doing this? She was ostracized at school for something she couldn’t control. Hawkmoth was never defeated under her time as ladybug, and she resigned from the position. She was the keeper of the miraculous now, so she sought out heroes who could defeat him. When she turned 18, Hawkmoth was revealed as Gabriel Agreste and sentenced to 12 life sentences in prison. 

Finally, after pleading with her parents, she moved to the United States for college. Fashion was a far off dream now, slowly sinking below the horizon. 

She went by Marie Dupain. She tried to remain invisible, sure that if she was noticed, she would be recognized. Marinette dyed her hair a darker black and wore baggy sweatshirts. 

Years passed and she had never achieved her dream of becoming a fashion icon. She still designed for different celebrities and high caliber clients, but she spent her days at a law firm after getting her degree in textiles and then achieving her law degree. She never returned to Paris unless it was to visit her family. 

It was just her luck that on the tenth Christmas she spent at her parents bakery, she would run into Alya, who was followed by a tall, freckled, ginger man. With a sharp inhale, she greeted her former best friend with a wan smile. 

“Girl! I haven’t seen you in ages!” Marinette shied away from the enthusiasm and attention. Alya prattled on before remembering her companion and purpose. 

“Oh, this is Shane.” She said, gesturing to her red-headed friend. “He’s a friend from university.” Marinette nodded slowly, wondering as she always did if this man was the one from the photos. 

Shane seemed agreeable enough, and Alya speedily roped Marinette into plans for them to reconnect. Marinette resolved to be on the next plane back to the US after Christmas. 

When Shane turned around, she noticed the peculiar birthmark on the back of his hand. It was shaped like a cat. A sleeping one, in fact. Marinette ran upstairs, abandoning her parents to take care of the rush. 

They never did find who posted those photos. The true identity of “Jake” was never revealed, nor did Marinette ever tell Shane that his photos were used against her. You see, happy endings don’t always come true. The bad guy isn’t always captured and killed in a grisly fire. That’s the power of being hidden behind a screen. 

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

More than 500,000 predators are online everyday. Kids 12 to 15 are susceptible to being groomed and manipulated by offenders online. FBI stats show that more than 50 percent of victims of online sexual exploitation are 12-15 years old.

- According to the University of New Hampshire's Youth Internet Safety Study (YISS), reports of unwanted sexual solicitations declined 53 percent between 2000 and 2010. As of 2010 only 9 percent of kids who use the internet received an unwanted sexual solicitation.

- The YISS report also found that two specific kinds of contact -- requests for offline meetings and situations that kids found extremely upsetting -- declined between 2005 and 2010.

- When there’s a report of an online predator (like the one about Roblox in 2017), multiple news outlets jump on the story, and they often appear in many outlets over a week or two, so it may feel like it's more common than it is. Also, it makes for a popular article since it plays on parents' fears.

- The University of New Hampshire's Crimes Against Children Research Center reports that kids are more likely to pressure each other to send or post sexual content than an adult.

-According to the New England Journal of Public Policy, contact with online predators happens mostly in chat rooms, on social media, or in the chat feature of a multiplayer game (Roblox, Minecraft, Clash of Clans, World of Warcraft, and so on).

-Most games meant for kids -- like Roblox and Animal Jam -- have built-in features and settings that are designed to prevent inappropriate comments and chat. Though they’re often imperfect, they do help.

-Games that aren’t designed only for kids have fewer controls, settings, and safeguards.

-Any app or online space that allows contact with strangers without moderation or age verification can allow contact between kids and adult strangers.Teens sometimes visit adult sites, chat rooms, and dating apps out of curiosity about sex and romance

-Only 5 percent of online predators pretend they're kids. Most reveal that they're older -- which is especially appealing to 12-to-15-year-olds who are most often targeted.

-Some predators initiate sexual talk or request pictures immediately and back off if refused. They're in it for an immediate result.

-In contrast, some predators engage in "bunny hunting," which is the process of picking a potential victim for "grooming": They'll look at social media posts and public chats to learn about the kid first.

-Once they've selected someone, they may begin the grooming phase, which often involves friending the target's contacts, engaging in increasingly personal conversations to build trust, taking the conversation to other platforms (like instant messaging), requesting pictures, and finally requesting offline contact.

-Sometimes if a kid shares one compromising picture, a predator will engage in "sextortion," which involves demanding more pictures or contact under threat of exposure or harm.

Be careful. Don’t trust anyone. Read up on what to do. Look up stories of victims like Amanda Todd. This is an unfortunately common thing, and I ask that people are aware of it. Marinette was targeted because of how open and vulnerable she was. Take care!

[zeroreviewmaster-blog]

It was 2007 I just started my undergraduate program completing higher secondary school .This is the time I set my mentality to start my own career .From than I started looking for part-time job around my city. But trust me it was seriously tough to maintain or make balance between my par-time job and engineering program. And I was really worried. Meanwhile I have to know that one of my friend Work Online From Home. And He is earning pretty good amount to maintain his lovely hood along with his study expenses. But I was wondering whether working online is legit or scam!  As a beginner I now can understand why I got into dilemma. After thinking lots of issue I one day directly asked him, Does legit online jobs are really present or not?   IF yes, How can I do legit online jobs? And where can I find actual legit online jobs? And I can I get paid in my bank account? Listening to my question he just laughed at me and introduced me with a Micro Task providing online marketplace Called Microkers.

Today, I am going to review on Microkers a marketplace for legit online jobs .This is the online marketplace where I personally started my online career. As a beginner you guys also can start your online career with this marketplace where you can find legit online jobs. I already told this for the beginner only who want to start their online career or them who want to work online from home. As because Microworkers.com provides legit online jobs for the beginner who does not have any experience at all.

Let me introduce with Microkers a marketplace to find legit online jobs:

Before talking about Microkers let me make you understand what is micro jobs? In very simple words micro jobs are simple, easy, temporary or small task type work mostly offered online or in person with a very short dateline. The job types are mostly blog writing, social media posting, search evolution, transcription , email id creation, proof reading, book keeping, website testing, app testing, writing review etc. The payment varies from 1 cent to 50 USD or more.

I hope you are clear about micro work or micro task. Microkers is a legit online jobs marketplace where you can find such types of micro task.It is a service of Weblabcenter,Inc hosted at 2591 Dallas Parkway, Suite 300,Frisco,TX 75034,United States. Microkers is a legit online jobs marketplace connects buyers and worker around the world. The workers are mostly students, stay at homes moms or retired professionals.

How to open account in Microkers to get legit online jobs?

Opening account in  Microkers to get legit online jobs is very easy and simple. One just need to have a valid email address and a phone number to validate your virtual identity. Along with you need to have a valid mailing or postal address to verify your physical address. And Bank Account details or virtual payment processor like paypal,skrill,or Payoneer.One need to open account in Microkers to get or provide legit online jobs .Once these information are in hand below steps to be followed:

Visit Microworker and click REGISTER button colored in blue.After clicking Register the url will be directed to SIGN UP Page.Where you will find a Sign Up Form.

In this form you need to provide full name which has to be as same as given in your Bank Account or Payment Processor.Else your earning may revert.

You also have to provide a valid and active email address and a mailing or postal address.As because after completing the form an email validation link or OTP code is send to your submitted email address. Sometimes we need to check inbox to find the validation link or OTP.And address has to me accurate as because a postal mail will be send during your first payment withdraw request to validate your physical identity.

You need to click the work terms and condition agreement button and submit.

After submission check your email to get the validation credential .Here you may need to verify your phone number by sending SMS at +19723609222 “ Activate “.

After phone validation you can log in your account and you can see that numbers of task available in your account and you may think that you will be able do to the job,right? But actually not.You need to attend a 2 qualification test under Qualification Tab and Test Tab  . The Qualification assessment test will be on Microworker FAQ and Basic English Test under Test Tab.

Once you complete the test successfully you will be ready to participate to do the Task.

  How to Pass Qualification Test on Microworkers.com is a legit online jobs marketplace?

To qualify or complete the Qualification Assessment Test your basic English skill or knowledge has to be OK .And rest question will be on FAQ section .Here in FAQ section . you find few general question and answer to have know how on the marketplace working process as I have already mentioned this is a  legit online jobs marketplace.The questions and relevant answer are discussed below:

What do you mean by Microworkers?

Answer: This is a platform to connect workers and Emplowers globally with an intension to complete small task .

Who are Employers?

Anyone can be Employer who provides task and makes payment for that even a worker also be Employer too.

Can one person have more that one valid account?

Answer: Simply NO .! One person will have only one account that is why physical address is verified.

How Can I earn money doing legit online jobs here?

            Answer: To complete a job click on the job under job section and read the job instruction very carefully. If you think that you are sure to complete the task go at the bottom of the page and accept the task. After completing the task you need to submit the proof as per instruction. After that buyer or employer will review the job with submitted proof.If the task is ok and accept by employer your account will be credited with success rate else negative rating  will be implanted .Account success rate has to be min 75 % of completed job. Buyer will be given only 60 days to review and rate if any task is not rated more than 60 days, automatically worker account will be credited with positive rating.

Why in Microkers Any worker needs to maintain Success Rating to ensure legit online jobs?

To maintain the quality the quality work done success rating upto the mark. This rating is provided by the Employer while reviewing the proof submitted by the worker. The success rating has to be minimum 75%.This leads to get the maximum work priority in worker account. The success rating is calculated based on Satisfied vs Non-Satisfied plus Non-rated task  provided by employer. In this case employer get 60 days to provide rating. If employer does not provide rating within 60 days, the task automatically rated satisfied.

As Microkers is a legit online jobs market place, why worker needs to maintain Reputation?

Often people get confuse between Reputation and Success Rating.In Microkers Success Rating is provided by buyer and Reputation depends on the number successful task completed in a particular category of task like facebook,youtube,blogging ctc.The reputation is represented by starts .After loged in your Microworks account click here to view your Reputation. This is extremely important to get high rated or maximum valued task in your account .Which displayed in HG jobs section.

The number of starts earn by a worker represents that how good at or performing he is in that particular work category.In Hire Me campaign if any employer wants to select experience worker for a particular category   ,the probability to get the chance for high rated worker.In my experience I have seen that in Hire Me campaign the value is pretty higher that the General job category.

How a worker can earn Reputation in Microworks?

To get Reputation one worker needs to complete at least 10 satisfied task to complete to earn one (01) star (1-5) in a particular category.For every category the process is same to earn a star .To gain one star minimum 10 task to be completed.

What will you understand if found no starts in you Microworks Reputation?

If you see zero stars or No star in your Microworks Accounts Reputation section, it means you have not submitted at least 2 task in a particular category or your success rate is equal to less than 50%.

            What does Employer understands by seeing Stars on Microworks Reputation?

I already mentioned in my previous discursion that the number of stars in Reputation section of any workers Microworkers Account for a particular job category determines that for that specific job category that worker is more qualified. For Better understanding I am just showing an example:

If any worker holds 4 star in Facebook job category it means he has successfully completed 80% job related to Facebook. If he has zero (0) stars or no star it means he fail to complete minimum 50 % task related to  Facebook so the chances get poor to hire directly by employer.

Your stars may be lose if the success rate get negative on the other hand the Reputation does not guarantee that you will be hired directly but it increased the probability.

How job are shown in our Microworks Account?

Jobs are shown in our account base on the campaign running in an Area or Zone. And based on ID hired directly by Employer .As because employer selects the campaign category to get the job done and hire worker.

As a result sometimes you may see that there less number of jobs available in your account sometimes more.

What to do if you are misrated for any job?

If you are misrated   for any job you have completed correctly there is an opportunity to file a complain just clicking  “   Create a Complain”    link. Microworker team will review the task and credit the due amount with proper success rate. I already told you Microworker is a legit online jobs marketplace and it approaches equally to all.

Another way Employer may ask to revise the job id that case by 48 hrs you got to revise the task. If by 48 hrs the particular task is not revised, simply this will be rated NOK or negative. But is you complete the job properly you can visit the “Submitted Tasks” section to view your completed job and the current status of your completed task. If you see green sign you will see these are rated positive and red cress are rated negative. Rest will show pending .For your completed job your account will be credited which you can see in your account at left corner of the site.

How to Withdraw Money from your Microworkrs Account?

Microworkers is a global platform. People around the world works here and earn money .To Withdraw Money from Microworks account there are mainly four payment gateway available.

Skrill=Min (usd 9 + 6.50 %)= USD585

Dwolla=Min (usd 9 + 6.50 %)= USD585 [Only for USA Residence ]

Paypal=Min (usd 9 +7.50 %)= USD675

Local Bank Transfer Via Transpay =Min (usd 9 + 3 %+ usd 1)= usd10.27

Payoneer =Min (usd 20 + 5 %)= USD 21

  In Microworkers to Withdraw Money PIN Verification mandatory .That is a PIN will be send to your physical mailing address to verify your Address.This is done only for the first time you Withdraw Money .Not all the time of Withdraw Money.This PIN Verification will is done if you select Skrill,Dwolla,and Paypal as your payment Method but there will no PIN Verification if the payment method is Payoneer or Local Bank Transfer Via Transpay. So if you want to avoid this PIN verification ,select  Payoneer or Local Bank Transfer Via Transpay as your payment method.But if you use other method like Skrill,Dwolla and Paypal a pin will be send but if the address is not given correct and if the PIN not reached and you want a new PIN 2 us dwill charged for new PIN to send.

People who want to work in Microworkers above information will surely help you.This is a renowned platform to work and earn some extra money. Most important is that this is a  legit online jobs marketplace.I highly recommend you all to work here as beginner.

The post “Microworkers” is a “legit online jobs” Marketplace you definitely should try as beginner. appeared first on ZERO REVIEW MASTER.

[segasister]

So. This is it.

The follow-up I promised months ago (if you follow my deviantArt). Almost fittingly because it’s been a year since this all went down: the ToonKriticY2K Scandal. And I was debating back and forth as to whether or not I should do this follow-up. Many reasons going back and forth as to why I should and why I shouldn’t. I unfortunately came up with more cons than pros:

I felt that coming forward would hurt more people than it would help.

I was worried not for my image, (I’m a small channel. What image do I have?), but for Voice.

I was worried for those also involved with him and them getting dragged into this mess. (No. I will not bring up their names.)

The only positive thing that came up in my list was that it would be off my chest. I thought I could circumvent this by telling people I thought I could trust. But out of concern, someone let someone else know. And now it’s public knowledge. Again, I will not bring up who did this.

Which brings us to today.

I will come forward and say yes, I had conversed with Zak, formerly known as ToonKriticY2K, for at least a month after the scandal let loose. Let’s rewind to a year ago, back when only a handful of us knew what he had done to the girl who will remain unnamed for her own privacy sake. Then someone decided to leak the information to Vida because they wanted justice for a man who had hurt them. That someone was me.

I thought I was doing the right thing by coming forward to someone I was acquainted with to not turn this into a drama-fest. I was right. He didn’t. I told him that most of the people who already knew didn’t want this public, but we were in the process of informing the Chicago branch of the Federal Bureau of Investigation. How that turned out played into why I kept silent about this for as long as I did. We’ll get to that in a moment.

Many people responded: some were former friends of his hurt by his betrayal. Some were people just wanting to milk the drama out of it. Most were people angry that a sexual predator was in our fandom, someone well-known. And a handful of those responses came from his victims. No. Survivors of what he did to them. Mine included.

Throughout the next month, Voice and I kept in regular contact with the FBI. In hindsight, we now know that as a, “witness,” Zachary, better known as Voice of Reason, would’ve had to alert the Albany PD. They would’ve eventually taken it to the FBI from there. But then FBI made the decision that it did: that since neither officially met in person, though there were plans to, and neither were fully nude in pictures exchanged between them, there was no case against him.

I was angry, at first. I was mad that this wasn't gonna go further… and I thought this was my fault. Because I was the one who decided to go to Vida to make it public. I thought I had hindered their investigation. So that was my thought process of why I kept quiet about what came next:

That same day, towards the end of February, I get a call from Zak. I had forgotten that he still had my number. I told him I was busy and stepped aside. Then I told Voice immediately. I say to him that I feel like this was the only way I could get closure from this: talking with him directly. He gave me the okay and I continued. 

You might say this is the equivalent of having a fear of sharks and going into the ocean wearing a meat suit or some other metaphor. Whatever metaphor you chose to describe this, you would be right. I face my fears head-on… that’s how I am.

I listened to him apologize and tell me that he was seeing a second therapist, trying to make an effort to actually do better. I later sent him a request on Skype so that I could look over and format his worksheets. They, along with my conversation with him, are gone now since I deleted him as a contact.

He had asked me if I could be used as a bridge, per se, to try to make amends with all of his other former friends. I agreed on one, mainly because he was the only one I knew personally: Voice. When I visited him in March, I brought up the suggestion for the two of them to have a call together, with him on my end. No. They did not exchange Skype contact information. The two talked with me listening in. Zak gave his apology to Voice, told him what he told me, and although Voice didn’t forgive him for what he did to me, Voice did listen.

After that, Zak would add me in a group with other bronies who decided to confront and come forward to him. It is there that he would tell us that he had since gotten a job. I don’t recall what that job was exactly, but let’s just say that it didn’t allow him to be near children. He himself hardly showed up, but the rest of us would talk occasionally. The only times Zak would interact with the group was with his boyfriend there as well. Just to be clear, the last time the two of us spoke directly was in March. I can’t recall when I last spoke with him in the group.

As for any other questions you guys might have:

How many people were in the Skype chat with Toon after he was outed? Not including me, roughly five.

How long were you there? I still am. Toon no longer is.

It possible there were more or other people who left before you got there? No.

Why did you stay in touch with Toon and what were your goals in doing so? I originally decided to come back into contact with him in regards to my nightmares. Afterwards, I guess you can say that we wanted to keep an eye on him.

Why put out that video with Voice, while still in contact with Toon? I wasn’t in contact with Zak at the time. We didn’t start talking again until the end of February.

When it came to the incidents between you, Toon, and Voice; why did you keep that secret for so long? What was your reason for interacting with Toon like that at that time? I kept quiet about the initial incident because I was worried that if I said anything, Toon would hurt Voice’s reputation in some way. If not his reputation, then his friendships with almost everyone else. This is also part of the reason I didn’t bring this forward. Voice is directly associated with me on the basis that we’re dating. I didn’t want him to lose his friends because of me.

Is Isaac in or know of this Skype group? He was in the group. And now he’s not.

Was there anyone in that group/in contact with Toon after he got outed that were under 18? No. We are all above the age of twenty-one, in fact.

Are you willing to share any or all the DMs you had with Toon after he was outed? No. Even if I was, after he and I parted ways again, I deleted the chat logs.

Were there any outside or internal forces that drove you to contact him? He contacted me.

Why did you refer to the child Toon was seeing as a, “side-girl?” Based on the dates he was seeing her, he was also dating other people at the time. Mimkage during the beginning, and Isaac towards the end of their affair.

Was there anything you said no to; whether it be in your later communications or the previous incidents? His requests to me to speak with any of his former friends. The only exception was Voice, because he was the only one I felt close with anyhow.

Have you parents been any sort of support for you during all of this No.

How goes moving out, since the GoFundMe concluded? I should be out by the end of the month. While I am thankful for the money raised to get me out, I still wanted to try leaving through an honest means (and also because I can’t just run off without my parents throwing a search party for me. They have security cameras on the property now.) The $5,000 that was raised is going to pay for my college tuition and other college fees. I got accepted into a community college where Voice lives. The semester starts in February and I’ve been looking for work up there since this past April.

Was there anyone in the Roundtable that knew you were still talking to Toon? Outside of Voice, no.

Through the Skype group, did you learn of any addition social media accounts that Toon was using? If so, are you willing to release them? There was one time where we thought he had a second twitter before he left. (In fact, he left the following day.) However, that turned out to be someone else. (That twitter, @tookriticy2k, has since been deleted.) Other than that, no.

What are your plans now, and how would you like to move forward on this? I… never thought about plans. As for moving forward, I would just say just, outside of focusing on school and looking for work, focus on Voice. We’ll celebrate our fourth anniversary this year.

So... that’s it, I suppose. I’ll be willing to answer any further questions if you have any.

[alarriefantasy]

Hey! Was wondering if you could make more blogger larry fics?

Hi darling! I’ve got a few here, hopefully you find something you like!!! :) :) 

                                       Social Media Fic Rec

I don’t want a taste (I want it all) by thedaggerrose (blessedfetish)

Words: 3k

What Louis really needed was a fat fucking nap.

What Louis got instead was some hipster-looking wannabe arguing with him over the validity of avocado toast.

Or the AU where Harry tells Louis to go fuck himself, Louis tells Harry to fuck him himself, and Harry follows through.

let it happen by glowoftheday

Words: 4k

or the one where Harry and Louis meet on Grindr, and they might just be soulmates

Friend Request by phdmama 

Words: 11k

Louis is bored on Facebook and in the “People you may know” suggestions, he sees the name Harry Styles. The profile picture doesn’t show the person. He thinks it’s an old family friend who he misses – maybe a middle-aged or elderly former neighbor or babysitter who he was fond of as a child - and sends a friend request. Turns out it’s not old man Harry from their old neighborhood, it’s hot young Harry (who he’s never met before) who accepts his friend request…“

nobody else has you down, but me by twinks

Words: 11k

Louis gets set up on a dating website. Harry is one of his 12 matches.

Thought The Song Was Sung by 100percentsassy

Words: 12k

Louis never auditioned for the X-Factor. Years later, Harry’s just another gay ex-boybander who lives alone with his cat… until Niall decides to take matters into his own hands and set up a profile for Harry on a dating website.

This Play Between The Sheets by Harriet1dfan

Words: 15k

Or the totally gratuitous BDSM fic where Louis’ is a drama queen and gets far too excited to pay attention to who he’s texting.

A kiss to build a dream on by noellehenry

Words: 16k

Harry has a brief encounter with a handsome stranger at the local Christmas Fair, the romantic kiss they share changes everything.

Harry is determined to find his Prince Charming and sets up a tumblr blog with help from his best friend Niall, owner of the locally famous Steamin’ mugs.

Let the challenge begin!

Send My Love by FallingLikeThis, Rearviewdreamer

Words: 17k

Louis Tomlinson is fed up with dating losers. Harry Styles is tired of leaving his love life up to fate. Maybe one last try is just what they need to get it right.

Or, when online dating actually works.

kiss me on the mouth and set me free by suspendrs

Words: 17k

Or, Louis is a gamer and Harry is a beauty guru, and VidCon is a good place to fall in love.

Then We Talk Slow by letsjustsee

Words: 20k

A famous/non-famous AU in which Louis banters back and forth with his new record company on Twitter, only to find out that Harry is the man behind the tweets.

Anonymous Said by alivingfire

Words: 21k

Or: two boys, two blogs, two years of anonymous messages, and a bookshop where it all comes together.

Ain't That A Kick In The Head! by lesbianharrie, wreckingtomlinson

Words: 22k

In which Harry’s a disaster gay who doesn’t know shit about soccer, Liam drinks too many blue raspberry Coolattas, Niall knows everyone, Zayn looks dead, and Louis is Not Happy about sharing his breakout moment with “Drunk Hawaiian Guy.”

Something Great by infinitelymint

Words: 31k

or, Louis is a student and Harry is the mega-famous singer that happens to post a photo with Louis in the background. Together they kind of break the internet.

You’re the Light by allwaswell16

Words: 31k

Before beginning a new graduate school in the fall, Louis Tomlinson decides to spend the summer working in Chicago as an editor’s assistant for the Chicago Tribune newspaper and staying with his old college roommate. What he finds on his first day of work is a tall, gorgeous editor named Harry who has the most beautiful green eyes he’s ever seen—and who also happens to be his new boss.

never shut us down by togetherwecouldbealright

Words: 32k

Tumblr!AU.

Louis is an insecure mess and he hides behind his blog. Harry’s a boy with a personality too bright and he’s everything Louis thought he would hate. They end up falling in love.

From Eight Until Late, I Think About You by supernope

Words: 35k

Involves a bunch of YouTube challenges (AKA excuses for Harry to get naked), some awkward snapchat mishaps, and a whole lot of pining.

say you want me by orphan_account

Words: 37k

A Famous/Not-Famous AU featuring Liam, Zayn, and Harry as the members of Sonic Boom, an English band that unexpectedly sky rocketed to international fame, Niall as their biggest fan, and Louis as the exact opposite. Harry’s a closeted pop star and Louis is the uni student he keeps fighting with on Twitter. It’s all silly banter until it turns into something else.

Warm Me Like Sunshine by rainbowslovehl (Larrymateforlife)

Words: 45k

Or alternatively, Louis accidentally discovers that Harry, the boy who he likes, has a tumblr account. He thinks it’s a chance to talk to him online without actually talking, getting to know him before they converse in real life. But things don’t go according to the plan when he finds that Harry is pining over someone who seems to be perfect. It gets worse when Harry starts talking to him in real life as well, since now he has to hide from him that his online friend (Tommo) is the same as his real life friend (Louis).

We’ll Be Seamless by dinosaursmate

Words: 52k

Louis spends all his spare time scrolling arty nude blogs on Tumblr but amongst them all, Green is his favourite.

Anonymously Yours by DirtyLarryStylinson

Words: 64k

Louis creates a fake, female social media account to talk to the new, straight boy, Harry Styles, on. Along with this, Harry is getting closer and closer to Louis and his friendship group, and things are taken way too far online.

When We Were Younger by dinosaursmate

Words: 76k

Sixteen year old Harry Styles’ world turns upside down when he logs on to gay teen chat to discover somebody has stolen his photos and used them as their own.

*credit to the owner of the manip

updated 6.8.19

[dailyhockeyimagines]

tyler seguin // i’m your biggest fan

warnings: mentions of alcohol

who: tyler seguin x reader

premise: tyler discovers ur fan account….

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

When you chose to be a marketing media major in college, you weren’t really thinking about how you could apply it. It seemed interesting and not too difficult, so you picked it without a second thought. Fresh out of college, you were beginning to regret the decision. Your business and econ major friends were finding jobs so quickly, but you couldn’t even find a job opening that worked with your major, let alone an actual job.

What happened next was completely out of your expectations. Just as you were about to give up searching, you stumbled across the perfect job. It was something you had never thought about doing, but, now that it was an option, felt like the only thing that could happen. 

A job offer came to you from the Dallas Stars, your favorite team growing up, asking you to run their media page. They wanted someone young who could interact easily with the team easily and someone who knew a lot about social media and marketing. The job was practically made for you and you accepted quickly.

You accepted right away, moving to Dallas within the week and starting the job a day after. You met everyone and knew that you would get along with all of them very well. They were all talented, of course, but they were also kind and caring, helping to ease you into the city and offering you friendship.

You were excited to document their news and games (and even birthdays!) on social media, getting to think of fun captions and post amazing action shots of the guys celebrating. Everything was going perfectly until something absolutely terrible happened.

You got a crush.

You always thought Tyler Seguin was attractive, even before you met him in person, but when he surprisingly had an amazing personality to match, there was nothing you could do. You desperately tried to not like him, even avoiding his requests to hang out and places where you knew he would be, but it was becoming increasingly difficult and, unfortunately, increasingly impossible.

Now that you admitted it to yourself, your job became even more stressful. How could you be around Tyler and the guys and act normal? 

You felt yourself avoiding posting photos of Tyler on the instagram. And, when the numbers quickly dropped after, you felt yourself posting too many. You over thought everything and your perfect job was quickly becoming a perfect nightmare.

Until you got the idea. So many Tyler Seguin fan accounts followed and interacted with your account. Sometimes, when you were bored, you scrolled through them, carefully avoiding liking the multiple drool worthy shirtless shots and giggle inducing pics with his adorable dogs. Looking back, it was a dumb idea, and a little childish for you honestly, but it felt like the only solution at the time: make your own fan account.

With your own account, you could post and swoon over Tyler any time you wanted and you wouldn’t have to worry about flooding the team instagram with just photos of Tyler.

You fumbled with a few usernames before finally deciding on sexyseguin91 and began posting. 

Thanks to your media marketing degree, your account became an overnight sensation. You flooded your account with pics of Tyler, trying not to post too many photos you had taken yourself to avoid revealing your identity. You switched out your carefully worded captions for thirsty one liners (”ugh so hot ty” or “shirtless tyler is literally my one dream in life”) and commented back to your followers in all caps and with multiple exclamation points. Although your 10k followers wasn’t anything compared to the 240k followers you had on the team account, you felt excited and like a local celebrity whenever you logged on. 

This went on for weeks, carefully logging into and out of accounts and keeping your phone locked. You almost thought you could get away with it too. Almost.

One night, you were at a bar with Jamie and Jordie Benn, getting french fries and beers, when Tyler crashes. You would normally become tense in his presence, but you were a little tipsy so you didn’t act weirdly around him.

Another beer in, and you are laughing over some silly story Jamie is telling about Jordy as a kid. You are so busy laughing that when Tyler asks if he can take over the instagram snap story, you barely acknowledge him. You definitely don’t tell him no and you definitely, even though you should, don’t remember which account you are logged into.

You and the Benn’s don’t notice that Tyler is too silent to be normal for five whole minutes. And in those five whole minutes, Tyler has wordlessly scrolled through all of your cringe worthy posts and captions and what not. When you steal a glance at him and see his expression, you know immediately.

In a state of shock, you grab your phone and run out, leaving behind a shell shocked Tyler and a confused Jamie and Jordy.

It isn’t until you get outside that you begin to cry. You don’t care about the long streaks of makeup that have definitely stained your face or the stares you get from people on the street. Your dream job is DONE your friendship with all the guys is DONE and, any shot that you potentially had with Tyler is completely and utterly DONE. 

You are about to delete the stupid account for good when a hand on your shoulder promptly stops you.

“(Y/N)” Tyler says, breathlessly. 

You don’t turn around to see him, but begin to speak.

“I’m sorry, Tyler. I know it’s stupid and embarrassing and I don’t even know why I did but I’ll delete it and I’ll send an email saying I’m quitting tomorrow and you’ll never have to see me aga–”

“What, no! (Y/N), what are you talking about??? That’s not what I want at all… I was the one who wanted to apologize, for how I acted back there. You didn’t do anything wrong…it’s actually really cute. I just was silent because I couldn’t believe you felt the same way after I had liked you for so long.”

You cut him off with a kiss, all the shame and embarrassment lifting from you immediately.

This was…well, this was perfect. You couldn’t have possibly considered a better outcome.

You kiss for a little longer, letting yourself melt into Tyler’s strong arms. When you finally break and decide to rejoin Jamie and Jordy to offer an explanation, Tyler’s face breaks out into a wide grin.

“What?” you say, smiling at his infectious happiness.

“Just thinking I should start a fan account for you in return” he says, teasing you. 

You blush red immediately and whack his arm playfully, trying to keep a stern face. But within seconds, you two are laughing about it. And maybe, just maybe, your stupid idea was actually one of the greatest things that could have happened.

[kikistiel]

The Post™

Here it is everyone. It is The Post™, the one that describes, to put it simply, What The Fuck Happened.

Earlier last year, I disappeared for a long while. I stopped updating Idolon, I went radio silent on tumblr, and pretty much stopped all communication on my social media (which to this day, I still haven’t rectified). Then suddenly I came back and I freaked people out a bit. I’ve gotten literally hundreds of messages ranging from “did you die” to “where’s idolon/TMWLTT” to “WHY KPOP THO??”. 

I meant to post this post on the new year, but I still wasn’t comfortable talking about it. But! I am now. I’m here, I’m ready to do this. Feel free to read it, ignore it, skim it, etc. But if you wanted to know What The Fuck Happened, here is The Post™.

Here we go! (There’s some juicy drama involving stalking, but if that makes you uncomfortable, here’s your warning.)

We as a collective tend to joke about 2016 being absolute shit, and with good reason. Well, personally... it was still shit.

The DEPRESSION.

I started 2016 off in the New Year as mega-depressed. I was quiet about it, didn’t talk about it much, but I was seriously down. I’d had thoughts about hurting myself before, but this was so different. It was so immense. It became a fact of life. I was starting to scare myself because I wasn’t even thinking about IF I wanted to end my life, I was having really macabre thoughts like “When would be a convenient time for me to do it? Maybe next Tuesday, I don’t have anything going on then.” It sounds funny to me now, but when your thoughts get like that, you know you’re in it bad.

Eventually I was able to pull myself out of it and honestly? A lot of that is due to you guys! Tumblr culture has helped me through a lot. Idolon feedback helped me too. 

The RESTRAINING ORDER.

I haven’t mentioned this on here before, and I was pretty quiet about it on personal social media like facebook too, but I’m a little tired of being quiet about it, honestly. He doesn’t deserve the decency of me “not talking about it”. I’m so ready to talk about it, y’all. I want to scream about it from the tops of mountains.

In the middle of 2016 I had to get a restraining order. It was against a guy that I used to live with. He had developed an infatuation with me. He was engaged and I was in a relationship, plus I wasn’t interested in him like that anyways, so I told him it wasn’t going to happen.

After he moved out, some strange things started happening. Literally every social media account I owned, including email, tumblr, twitter, youtube, etc, ALL OF IT, was hacked in to. Pictures of me, including some sexual in nature, that were either taken from my personal computer or taken by friends (who did not share it outside of our social circles) were uploaded to my Google+ account. At first I thought it was some foreign scam system, but after those pictures were posted, I knew it was someone I was familiar with. Soon, sexually explicit “fanfiction” of me, my roommate, and a friend together was being posted on the accounts. Things like “whore” “slut” “lesbian” were posted under pictures of me. I would get taunting messages from my own accounts and email, saying they were going to give me my things back. They never did.

A friend of mine who is an admin of a site I frequent compared the IP address logging in to my hacked account on his site and was able to tell me that the IP was shared by the apartment the guy I rejected lived in. Now, his fiance did not like me as a person, so we suspected it might have been her -- but we didn’t know for sure, and we let it drop. I had no idea the guy would be capable of doing something like that. I thought he was harmless.

Anyways, we let it go. I got my things back and nothing happened for a while.

Until that is, I got a call from my boyfriend while I was back home visiting my family. The fiance had gone in to his computer and found EVERYTHING. Gross sexual fantasies/stories of me, the pictures he stole, passwords for my accounts, everything. Apparently he knew about it too -- I got a skype message from him right before news broke to me saying “I have to talk to you. If you hear it from someone else first, I’m sorry.”

So, there it was! It was him. I was livid. I wanted to commit murder, you guys, and if I wasn’t in Atlanta at the time that it happened I might have done it. He only lived like three blocks away from me at the time, which terrified me.

I shouldn’t have let it go, but I didn’t know what else to do. I was happy to finally know who did it, but I had heard horror stories of people being brushed off by law enforcement for trying to pursue cyberstalking cases. His fiance dumped him and he moved away, and I didn’t hear from him for a long time. I blocked him on every thing. I was done with the situation.

Until...

My roomie and I were up late talking and she said she had gotten a friend request on facebook from a girl she didn’t recognize. She said that her and I were mutuals to this person, so I went on facebook to try to decipher who it was. The profile had only one picture of a generic looking girl. I’m usually pretty careful with accepting friend requests, but this girl had 6 different friends in common with me, so I must have accepted it long ago (I had accepted her request back in like... 2012) because I thought she was an old aqquantince I didn’t recognize anymore. But then I looked at the friends she had with me...and it didn’t line up. She was friends with people from middle/high school AND friends from college (who would have had no way of knowing each other) AND even some online friends. We were immediately suspicious and messaged the friends about it, who all eventually replied saying they had no idea who this girl was.

I knew immediately what was going on. I also felt like the name seemed familiar -- I had just started selling the first printed copy of Idolon online, and remembered seeing that name as one of the people who ordered a book. I looked up the address she had ordered under, and it was this guy’s address for where he worked. That proved this whole persona was him.

I. Was. Disgusted. I had spent years trying to get away from this guy and hiding all my personal info from him, only to find out that he’d been getting updates on my life ALL ALONG. My new address and phone number had been posted on that facebook profile of mine at least ten times. I had personal pictures on my facebook, personal info, info about my relationships and friends and what was happening in my life and all along he’d been able to see all of it.

The next day I went to the court house. I’d had enough, and I was fed up. I filed a petition for an order of protection (restraining order). My case was technically filed under DOMESTIC VIOLENCE because the guy involved had once lived with me. THIS IS IMPORTANT, IF ANY OF YOU EVER HAVE THIS PROBLEM! Stalking and DV are seen differently, so if your abuser once lived with you, MAKE THAT KNOWN. I was lucky to have my case taken on by a legal aid team free of charge (ANOTHER IMPORTANT NOTE!! Many DV legal clinics exist and are very willing to take on your case if you can’t afford a legal team!! DO RESEARCH ABOUT THEM IF YOU ARE EVER IN THIS SITUATION!!).

This was so, so helpful because I was afraid to face this creep. Normally for these kinds of petitions, you represent yourself, which is honestly? so mind boggling for me. I saw people come through that office that were in neck braces and covered in bruises from their abusers and they were still expected to represent themselves in court and face their abusers just like that. Full offense, but what the fuck?

So, I had a legal team helping me, and my god the woman who represented me was one intimidating bitch. Full stop no-nonsense. She was amazing. I have never felt so much adoration for a person, ever. This woman could have taken up a job as a lawyer at a firm making bank, but instead she represented DV victims free of charge. After my case was over I literally cried in her arms, guys.

Anyways we built a case for months and months. I had to dig up old conversations, ask for affidavits from many friends, and prepare testimony with witnesses. (Side note -- that fiance who kind of hated me? Well she must have hated me more than she hated with him. She refused to help by making a measly written statement about what she found and witnessed, because she “didn’t like” me. I aspire to be that level of petty one day. Amazing.) It was stressful, but I was nervous the day of the trial because how was I going to go on with life if we’d lost and this guy was ALLOWED to keep contacting me?

My lawyer kept telling me that the judge we had was a known hard-ass, and wasn’t well liked. He was known for being... unsympathetic. I was nervous because my case involved cyberstalking and this guy was a grumpy old white guy who looked like iPhones confused him. At the pre-trial he even got in to an argument with my lawyer about if an emergency order of protection was needed until the trial date.

The day of the trail, I had me, my boyfriend, my two roommates and a friend there as both witnesses and moral support. He showed up alone. He sat across from the courtroom from me and even being in the same room as him caused me to panic. Like... cold sweats and heart racing. 

After all my witnesses had given their testimony, he took up his right to question me, which was nerve wracking. He asked me about every little thing I did, brought up my rejection of him (which I let him down easy?? Like holy shit ladies, if you ever reject a guy and you try to let him down kindly because you’re afraid of getting murdered by him later, just know that he’s going to use that against you later claiming that you didn’t mean it or some shit, jesus christ). It was gross and I don’t want to go in to detail about it. Just trust me it was horrible.

Then my lawyer questioned him and my god she ripped him apart. And then I was pleasantly surprised that when the crusty old judge questioned him, HE RIPPED HIM APART TOO. He just kept asking things like “what earthly reason would you have to do this or that?” and he’d flail around trying to come up with an excuse and the judge would just keep repeating “Why? WHY?” over and over again.

ANYWAYS. Good news! He took all of three minutes to deliberate before he awarded me a restraining order. It lasts for two years with the option to renew it afterwards. I was so happy I think I felt my soul ascending right then and there.

I contemplated making new accounts, like twitter, tumblr, etc, ones that he wouldn’t know about, but eventually decided against it. I wasn’t going to keep running away because of him, you know? He probably still reads this tumblr, too. In which case, Adam, if you’re there -- sucks to be you doesn’t it? Go die maybe?

So that happened. I moved on.

The CAT(s)

When my boyfriend and I first got together seven years ago, and I went to go visit him in Vancouver, we adopted a cat together. We had her for so long, it was never just “me and him”, it was always “me, him, and Ink”.

One day she stopped being able to use her legs. They became incredibly swollen. We took her to the vet immediately. They told us she’d suffered some sort of embolism (?) and that there was nothing they could do for her. They put her down that day.

I was devastated. We had no warning -- we took her to the vet not knowing that we wouldn’t be coming home with her again. We’d had her so long that she was an integral part of me. She was an amazing cat, and I loved her with every fiber of my being. I cried for weeks about it. I felt like I had lost a child. Even typing about her now makes me a little misty eyed.

Eventually sometime later, my boyfriend and I decided that we would try to repair the loss we felt by giving another cat a home. We went to the shelter and actually ended falling for two cats, which we both took home.

I fell so in love with them. One of them was even named Jiji (Get it? From Kiki’s Delivery Service? My name is Kiki? I thought it was cute...). They were perfect cats, very sweet and affectionate. I didn’t think I’d be losing them so quickly, but then...

The BREAKUP

I’d posted about my boyfriend for a long time on here. I was with him for seven years, since I was 17 years old. He was my first serious, long term relationship, and I was head over heels in love with him. Sure we had problems, but what couple didn’t?

Sometime in the summer, after years of hard work, he’d gotten his dream job as a motion designer as Rooster Teeth. We were so happy, but it also meant moving to Austin. I might have mentioned this on here once or twice. Well, anyone wondering why I don’t live in Austin?

We had made a plan that he would move down there first and get an apartment and I would follow a couple months later, to finish out my con season. He would take the cats, it was just easier that way.

I was in the hospital recovering from surgery, completely hyped up on painkillers and other drugs, totally out of my mind, when he left. He came to see me, but I barely remember the exchange. That was the last time I saw him.

Months went by and he and I picked out an apartment together. He moved in all his stuff. I started getting my affairs in order. It was the day after ChiCon, a couple weeks before I was supposed to fly down there (tickets were already ordered) and I told him I wanted to tell him all about my weekend. So, we talked over the phone. I told him about my ChiCon adventures. Then he said he wanted to talk...

He said he wanted to break up. He said he wasn’t happy anymore. I was devastated. I was in shock, and denial. I cried, I screamed, I begged, but he was done.

Listen. There is absolutely no good reason, none at all, to break up with your partner of seven god damn fucking years over the phone. If you do this, you’re an asshole of the highest caliber. I don’t care what you have to say, don’t do this. Don’t do it.

I didn’t know what to do. I was at a complete loss. I didn’t even remember what it was like being single or not in love. I went home to see family. I checked in to a psychiatric hospital. I stopped doing anything I enjoyed. I’d lost a huge part of my identity, and the worst part was that I was still in love with him.

He kept the cats, OUR cats. I’d lost my close animal companions again for the second time that year. That hurt almost worse. (Also, he came back to our apartment for Christmas... and I was just supposed to have him stay here in the same apartment with me acting like nothing was wrong and pretend I was fine. And I wasn’t fine. [insert Katy Perry ‘you say you’re fine’ audio here])

This was around the time I stopped updating Idolon. I hated doing that you guys, and a lot of people were mad about it, but I just wasn’t ready to open up about why. Do you guys understand a little bit now? I really hated taking a break, BELIEVE ME. Idolon kept me going when other things didn’t, but I was so devastated and depressed that I just couldn’t make myself care anymore.

I also gave up using social media, including tumblr. This is why I disappeared for a while. I still haven’t gone back to facebook or twitter.

..........The KPOP

I pretty much only came back to tumblr, and that was because I discovered something that made me feel something close to happy again: Kpop! I know the appearance of Kpop was really jarring for a lot of you, and I lost a lot of followers for it (over 4k in fact, haha...). But it was something that brought me joy again for the first time in a long time. Listening to it and being invested in the groups just makes me happy. 

I know, I know, there’s a running joke that people turn in to Kpop blogs out of no where, and it IS funny, but there’s a deeper reason behind it than just my interests shifting. It literally just made me want to start making/drawing/editing again. I started getting creative again. I didn’t just sit around in my apartment all day in the same sweatpants for six days straight doing nothing with my life feeling sorry for myself. BTS has a new album coming out called “You Never Walk Alone” and honestly? For someone like me, who went through hell and back in such a short amount of time, that alone makes me feel a lot of hope. I know it’s silly to feel like that over a band or album but... music has always had  that way of making you feel things right?

Am I over the breakup? My cats? The stalking? No. Hell no. I’m more down than ever, but I don’t feel like ending it all anymore. I feel like I have things to look forward to again and that things will brighten up for me eventually. 

I came back here because you guys have always supported me unconditionally, and you all continue to do so. I’m very lucky to have you guys. Most of you have supported my shifting interests and still support Idolon (WHICH YES, IS NOT DEAD AND IS COMING BACK!).

Anyways. This was really long, wow. I didn’t mean for it to be. But I felt like I owed you all and explanation and I got rambly with the details. By the way, I have adopted a new cat. Her name is Chihiro (yes, from Spirited Away), and I love her. And she is mine, and mine alone, and no one can take her away from me. I got a semicolon tattoo on my hand. It reminds me every day that just because I’m hurting, doesn’t necessarily mean I did anything wrong.

If you read all the way through, thank you. I’m in a better place now, even if it’s only slightly. I feel like there are reasons to go on now, and things may still be hard but... I think I’ll be okay. 

For the first time in a long time, I feel like I’m going to be okay.

[all-too-ale]

Trigger warning ahead

I need to get some things out of my chest and I can’t talk it out with anyone out there, because everyone in my life knows my best friend. So, warning, I get into some really dark topics after the cut, But the TL;DR is basically: Remind your loved ones that they’re loved. Remind them that you’re there for them, that they don’t bother. Because it is easy to forget, easy to twist in your head... and you never know what they are or have gone through. 

Romina has always been my best friend, since we met at pre school when we were 4. It’s been 20 years, we have been through discussions, parties, bullying, fan girling, lying to her parents (mostly her father, but he sucks tbh) so she could go out with me, and getting separated by universities and 25 hours by bus. I love her, my family loves her and I have always thought she is my soulmate. We were meant to be in each other’s lives, just like that.

When we were  in our late 16, she got her first boyfriend. I never met him, because he a couple of years older than us and from other city, they met in one of the catholic summer camps she volunteered sometimes. She would talk about him all the time tho, he would come to our city on the weekends to visit her, I felt that I knew everything I needed: she seemed happy. 

I don’t know when that changed. I wish I would have seen it sooner. I don’t think that would have made a difference though... I wish I knew what I know now.

She would stop smiling when talking about him. She would tell me that he asked her, multiple times, to come visit him to his city. And I would remind her, multiple times, something we both knew and she that she, multiple times, tried to explain to him: it was impossible. She was a 17 year old school student, who had no money and lived with her over protecting, over bearing, and over demanding parents. There was no way they would let her, her father was already strung up by her request of going to study to other city next year, in one of the best universities (you would think a parent would be happy having a daughter studying medicine in one of the top universities..)(well, we are talking about a man who couldn’t believe my parents let my 22 year old sister go on a trip with her boyfriend of 4 years).

But the boyfriend, Pato, just got mad.

I started talking to her about it, how it wasn’t her fault, how she really couldn’t do much about it, to not listen to him. I started worrying. I started to wish she left him.

I will always remember, the night we and another friend of us (we drifted apart from her for *reasons* but back them the 3 of us were sisters) had a slumber party. We made them all the time, would rent movies and buy food and just had a fun night. That night he called her, again. He had been calling her a lot, and it never ended well. It didn’t end well that night either. She talked for like an hour, outside in the backyard, while we waited for her in the living room. She was crying and kept crying for some time after we convinced her to hung up.

We were 17, we really didn’t know what to do, we just clean her up and put on a funny movie to cheer her up.

They broke it off later that year, months later. I remember it too well. I feel sometimes I was a rock, there for her, because there was no way in hell she was getting back together with him. I held her through the calling, the begging, I held her after he tattoed her name and after he threatened to kill himself if she didn’t go back with him. Man, I am not a cold bitch, but I was one during that whole time. He could kill himself for all I cared, I would just keep holding my best friend and telling her none of it was her fault.

He didn’t kill himself though. Instead, he kept stalking her. Moths after, when we were 18 and she was already off to college miles away, he contacted and threatened a guy she had been going out with. Then he did the same with other classmates of her. The next time we were together, I took my computer and made her log into every social media and account she had. Every single one. Until this day I don’t think I would be able to replicate what I did that night. I blocked him off completely and I secured her accounts so throughtfully, no one can actually find her without being accepted by me first. This was per her request, I am the filter. After that night, he was never able to contact or bother her again. The next semester, she changed campus. We never heard of him again.

Man, I hate him. It’s been 6 years since that night and I still hate him and didn’t think that would change. What I didn’t take into account is that it could change for the worse.

Romy was diagnosed with depression a couple of months ago. We hadn’t seen each other in 2 years due to her studies and my inhability to travel there, and this came as a surpirse. I had no idea when she got that bad. We had little chance to talk about it but we had a trip planned for months to Montevideo, so I planned to have the Conversation there. I thought how would I bring the topic, what would I say, I scrambled for every bit of bravery and love I had to not run from Complicated Topic.

And I brought it up. And she threw me a curveball by bringing the topic of The Worse Ex back, Pato, and telling me how this year just everything fell on her, how she didn’t saw it coming either, and how it had finally hit her that she had been sexually abused by him at some points in the relationship.

I hate him so much.

I didn’t say what I planned at the end. We talked and we cried and we hug. She named some friends she talks to and I told her she doesn’t need to talk to me about this if she doesn’t want to, because I understand we spent too much time apart.  But I told her that I hoped and needed to know she had people close who she could talk tto, so she wouldn’t bottle it all up again. And she said that she wanted to talk to me, but like I have a job, and I do Shit ™ with my life (like going out and exercising)(medic school surely lowers the bar on a whole new level uh?) she didn’t want to bother me.

She doesn’t bother me, she never had and I can’t belive I never said those words out loud to her before, but I did then. Then we bought cheese and wine and we went to the hostel to keep talking.

I just needed to get this whole situation out of my chest. Again, everyone who is in my life knows about my best friend at some level. So I can’t talk about this with everyone and I’m the kind of people who sometimes needs to talk shit out to process it. I usually talk with my parents and sister about eveything, they’re my support system, and they know about her bad ex bf, but I don’t think I can tell them this. It feels wrong. 

So, I am here. Trying to make sense of it all.

[jimbicknell-blog]

Turkle’s interview, Louis C.K.’s video, and my daily social media use log.

I’ll preface this by saying that, as a whole, I despise what is quickly becoming in my opinion a bit of a pandemic.  That is, if it isn’t already the modern Spanish Flu only with batteries.  The same sort of thing both Louis and Turkle touch on.  The death of actual conversation in favor of staring dead eyed at a phone screen.  I hate this current shift toward some sort of Facebook generation.

At its inception, Facebook, and the idea behind it, were remarkable.  It was a place to keep in touch with your one group of peers, college aged students. No parents, no preteens, no grandparents.  There were no games at the start, no “likes” if I remember right.  It was simple and served a legitimate purpose.

How far gone a purpose is perhaps debatable, though I’d argue that for the most part, the site as a whole is essentially an internet vampire sucking the life right out of you.  I can think of a thousand things in a second that I’d rather do than share something on Facebook.  I don’t have the app on my phone, my account/password aren’t saved on it, I check it maybe once a year for all of sixty seconds.

Though as I do this, all around me are the people that get netted in.  Especially the young.  I can’t even have a proper conversation with some of my youngest family members because even the youngest of my cousins has a smartphone at this point.  And they don’t just own one, it may as well be welded onto their hand.  Their eyes are downcast to the LED glow, they bob their head as if listening, but their answers are vague and often not on topic.

I remember my first cell.  I was fourteen working a job at a gun range and wanted one for the sole purpose of being able to call my parents for a ride back home.  Something they could call me on if they were going to be late, that sort of thing.  Web wasn’t really a thing on them back then, and while it did do text messaging, it was 10 cents sending or receiving and something I did not use.  I bought the device and paid for my plan both.  Fast forward a bit over a decade and here we are, where my 8 year old cousins have more modern smartphones than I do.

I absolutely agree with Turkle’s idea of sanctuary zones, where you put the phone away and leave it.  Dinner, especially.  This doesn’t apply just to family, either.  When I’m out for a drink with friends, we often have a rule.  Everybody puts their phone away, and anyone caught sneaking a peek is buying everybody else a round.

I will never understand the people filming at a concert.  Especially if they are filming a big screen at a concert.  Louis is right, you’re never going to actually watch that.  People throw it up on facebook or twitter or whatever else and just seek the attention that they were there.  The funny thing is, I actually employ my phone with my gopro setup to do a lot of filming.  Mostly fishing and underwater videos, mahi on the line, sharks bumping against the lens, that sort of thing.  I don’t throw them up on youtube, I don’t put them on facebook, I share them face to face with somebody who couldn’t have been there with me.

Why?  Because nothing starts a conversation off like showing somebody a video of a big, toothy critter about six inches away from the camera.  Or of hauling in tuna in twelve foot rollers some twenty six miles offshore as lightning cracks overhead and waterspouts kick up around the boat. Maybe the one video I wish I’d posted somewhere because I lost it when I accidentally wiped the flash card.

You don’t get that by posting it on facebook or youtube.  Sure, you’d get some likes. Maybe some PETA vegans blowing up the comment section.  But not a conversation.

I think that smartphones are every bit as addictive as maybe even heroin.  There are people who can’t live without it, as described in both videos. They practically live through the device, more attached to it than the world and people around them.  Maybe it is to fill some sort of lonely void as Louis seems to think.  I find it at least equally plausible that it is more a vanity issue.  People get addicted to the “likes”, to the thumbs ups on youtube, to more tweets in their direction.  If tweets in their direction is even a thing, I don’t know, all I’ve ever used it for before this class was when I heard about sports news via some insider.  Even then, I wasn’t actually going to twitter, it’s just where the info first broke.

Moving on to the social media log assignment, it didn’t really take me very long to get a baseline reading.  I don’t ever use my facebook, which is the one social media thing I even have an account for.  I do a tiny bit of texting, if that counts.  Today it was to let my one friend know to head out to meet at the gym, and to another that he isn’t going to stop being pre diabetic by sleeping instead of deadlifting. Another to let a different friend know that, while I let his dog out, he did a bit of a roll through mud while chasing a soccer ball and is probably going to need a bath.  Sorry, Matt, I did the best I could with the towel by the door.

I’m sure that there are people who would share all of this on facebook or instagram or something else.  I see them snapping selfies after two reps, hashtag it with a #swole, and then sit there for another few minutes clicking the pretend cows before leaving and acting like they actually accomplished something.  Arnold has a great term for cellphones in a gym.  “Mickey mouse stuff.”  I’d actually go a bit further and say that applies to just about any situation.  If you’re doing something that should require your full attention, or something amazing like jumping out of a plane, documenting it on your cell should be the last thing on your mind.  To be honest a lot of fishing trips I don’t even remember to turn my gopro on, if I even remembered to charge it, or even pack it.  If you read my first post this week, you’ll note that I don’t even bother uploading these videos anywhere.

I even know a guy who lost his chance at a once in a lifetime trophy deer because he was fiddling trying to do a snapchat, dropped it, and had the buck run off on him.  He feels a bit different about trying something like that now.

It’s a real conflict for me to manage all of this.  I know that social media is basically required for a modern business to actually thrive.  Not because it is really some necessary thing, but because there are billions of phonezombies out there who pay in the same cash everybody else does.  Sure, it has a few other uses, making announcements easier to spread and such.  For the most part, though, it’s just another form of advertisement spam.

All the while I’m actually perfectly content with not uploading my daily life to the web.  If I want to know what somebody else is doing, I’ll usually call or at minimum text.  Maybe an email if it is a bit long winded. I only use these as tools in the cases where an actual face to face conversation isn’t possible, usually because of distance or time.

Concerning my social media experiment, I am actually, for a 24 hour period, going to attempt to use my phone as much as my peers.  I’ll log in to my facebook, I’ll read whatever inane information people have slathered all over, I’ll maybe even confirm those dozens of people I’ve met who send me a friend request after.  I’m writing this little part ahead of time as a way to give my predictions as well.

I have little doubt that I’m going to hate it.  Likely for all of the same reasons I stopped using any social media in the first place.