#the rest of me playing this story will be hollow bc shes not in my arms

[toriliashine]

I NEED HER

[heartfelttickles]

Ticklish Terrors

Note: This is my first ‘long’ fic so I’m aware it’s not amazing haha but I do hope you like it! If there’s anything that can be improved then feel free to let me know, bc I am by no means an expert haha… hope you all have the best day :)

Fandom: Heartstopper

Characters: Nick and Charlie

Words: 1500

Story: Nick and Charlie are watching a movie when Charlie discovers a secret about Nick.

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It was a cozy, Halloween afternoon at Nick's house. The air was filled with the warmth of a crackling fireplace and the sweet scent of freshly baked pumpkin pie, courtesy of Charlie. Nick and Charlie, sat on the living room couch, enjoying each other's company and intently watching the latest horror movie – Nick gripping Charlie’s hand every time a jump scare happened.

“Oh my gosh, who knew rugby lad Nick Nelson was scared of horror movies?” Charlie jokingly remarked when his boyfriend squeezed his hand for what felt like the hundredth time.

“Hey..” he lowered his voice, still playful, whilst poking Charlie’s side, earning a yelp and a slight giggle “that was uncalled for, there’s no need for this many scares- why couldn’t you let me watch a Marvel movie or something where I don’t feel on edge for 2 hours?’ A slight tinge of red growing on his face.

‘You know I hate Marvel movies and this is just a bit of fun, it’s Halloween of course we have to watch a horror film - it’s an unspoken law.’ Charlie justified his movie choice. Nick simply flinched again when another haunting note was played on the organ.

Nellie, afraid of the loud noises, curled up beside them. “This is just cruel, you’re scaring Nellie now, how dare you terrify my dog’ Nick looked down at Charlie with a cheeky grin as Charlie sassily rolled his eyes.

Nick absentmindedly scratched Nellie behind the ears, and she wagged her tail in bliss. The ‘rugby lad’ shifted his focus back to the movie when Nellie leaned towards his side, her nose sniffing around, in an attempt to find the comfiest place to rest her head. Feeling her nose poking around over his side caused Nick to squirm slightly - his hand flew up to cover his mouth but even that couldn’t stop the muffled giggles from tumbling out of him.

Charlie, never one to miss an opportunity for a good laugh, was quick to notice Nick's amusement. He turned to his boyfriend with a mischievous grin and an eyebrow raised – noticing his lover’s shoulders bouncing up and down with uncontrollable giggles.

"What's got you laughing, Nick?" Charlie asked, his curiosity piqued.

Still chuckling, Nick replied, "I dohont knohow what it ihis, but Nehehellie ihihis snihihiffing mehe. Ihit feheheels so weheheird.’

Charlie's eyes twinkled mischievously as an idea sparked in his mind. Scooting closer to Nick, he playfully wiggled his fingers in the air- Nick’s giggling subtly increasing, which unfortunately for him, Charlie noticed.

"Oh, so you think tickling is funny, huh? Because you’re already giggling more with just my fingers giving near you. I think I’m going to have to test my hypothesis that teasing makes you even more ticklish than usual!" Charlie declared, before pouncing on Nick gently, tickling his sides mercilessly.

Nick immediately burst out into hysterical laughter, squirming and trying to escape Charlie's ticklish assault. His joyful laughter filled the room, echoing off the walls, blending with the crackle of the fire.

‘Aww Nick, does this tickle? Are your sides ticklish?’ He taunted - fingers increasing their speed and exploring every inch of his sides – relishing in the increasing cackles he elicited from his boyfriend. ‘Wow. You’re reacting like this just on your sides when I know you’re more ticklish elsewhere. I wonder what will happen if I just happen to….I don’t know…. Go here?’ Charlie’s devilish fingers spidered into the hollows of Nick’s armpits, drawing out a squeal from the burly lad as he clamped his arms down, thus trapping the notoriously nimble fingers in one of his worst tickle spots.

‘Chahahar stohohop teheasing…. I cahahant…’ is all the older boy could get out as he attempted to thrash himself away from tickles.

‘Aw you’re so adorable like this you know…. But you do realise my hands are trapped here? I would like to have my hands back if that’s okay with you? So be a good boyfriend and lift your arms up for me?’

‘I chahahant – I knohohhow thahaht trihihick’ Nick giggled out, cheeks turning a flushed shade of red.

Charlie simply sighed theatrically. ‘Okay have it your way, I can do this all day, I’ll just stay in your ticklish armpits for eternity.’

After many, many, many attempts, Nick finally mustered the ability to lift his arms enough to release Charlie’s fingers. Charlie finally relented, allowing Nick to catch his breath, but remained on him. Unbeknownst to them, Nicks mom had witnessed the latter of the attack – a grin on her face hearing Nick’s laugh.

‘It’s been a while since I heard you laugh like that Nicky, darling’ she finally broke the silence.

Almost in synchronisation, Charlie’s head whipped around, and Nick’s head popped out from the side of Charlie – juxtaposing expressions of both embarrassment and their residual smiles.

‘Don’t forget Charlie, his inner thighs are his worst spot…’

‘Oh really’ Charlie, grinning back at her before she left, whipped his head back to face his boyfriend and was able to secure himself on Nick’s waist, hands evilly hovering near his thighs, ready to test out this newfound information.

‘Mom you’re such a traitor… Char – Chahar wahahait.’ Nick’s hands shot out trying to push Charlie’s hands away from his thighs, not being able to stop the anticipatory giggles that tumbled out.

‘enjoy the rest of the night darlings.’ She exited the room swiftly - cup of tea in hand, wide smile of joy plastered on her face.

‘I’m dyyying to see this now’ Charlie playfully exclaimed, locking eyes with Nick’s who attempted his classic golden retriever puppy eyes. Any other scenario, Charlie would have caved immediately… not today.

One squeeze was all it took.

‘CHAR- NOHOHO’ An onlooker would have thought he’d been struck by lightning with the intensity of his reaction from one squeeze.

‘Oh…..my….gosh….. you really are adorably ticklish, have I told you?’ Charlie teased, slightly shocked at how ticklish his boyfriend actually was. Without giving Nick a chance to answer he used both hands to squeeze the tenderly, ticklish inner thighs.

‘AHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAH CHAHAHAHHAHAAR………. NOHOHOHOHO’ Nick positively screamed, head thrown back, back arched, legs violently kicking and thrashing from side to side to escape the ticklish torment from his lover.

‘Aw nick, tickle tickle tickle’ Charlie cooed. Another squeal escaped Nick.

‘The teases definitely make you more ticklish…. Somehow that’s possible… does this tickle sweetheart? Tickle…. Tickle… tickle….’ Charlie enunciated every ‘tickle’ that he spoke with alternating squeezes on his thighs, tears of laughter forming in Nick’s eyes.

He finally let up once Nick’s laughter turned silent. Red faced and breathless yet still giggling with a wide smile on his face – still looking at his tickler boyfriend with the adoration he’s had for him since their first meeting.

Charlie sat next to nick once again, rather proud of his playful victory of proving his hypothesis right.

‘I think you’re the most ticklish person I’ve ever met Nicholas Nelson’ a mischievous glint in his eye as he teased his red-faced boyfriend.

‘You sure about that?’ Nick questioned, his playful energy surging back to him. ‘So it seems tickling is the weapon of choice today then, huh?’ He paused, waiting for Charlie's response.

Charlie's expression shifted, realising he had fallen into a classic trap. "Oh no, what have I done?" he exclaimed dramatically, pretending to gasp.

Without giving Charlie any time to react, Nick lunged forward, expertly targeting Charlie's ticklish spots. His nimble fingers danced across Charlie's ribs, and Charlie erupted into laughter squirming and wriggling, gradually slipping further and further down the couch.

‘NIHIHICK STOHOHOP’ Charlie cackled.

The room filled with the joyful sounds of their laughter, mingling with Nellie's barks of excitement as she joined in the fun. Nick couldn't help but laugh along with Charlie, feeling their bond grow even stronger with every ticklish retaliation.

‘Come on Nellie, you tickled me, now it’s time to help tickle Charlie’ Nick playfully exclaimed to the cheery dog, who simply licked Charlie’s face and settled beside him.

After another few minutes, Nick finally stopped tickling Charlie, both boys left breathless and feeling an indescribable joy radiating between them. They sat back on the couch, leaning against each other, recovering from the tickle-induced euphoria.

‘ I think we've had enough tickles for one day, we still have a movie to watch’ Charlie said, grinning widely.

Both lads locked eyes on the TV only to find the credits rolling in the movie – much to Nick’s delight. Unable to control his smugness of not having to watch the horror movie, Nick glanced at Charlie. Almost telepathically, their hands attracted each other into a tight hold – maintaining their eye contact of admiration and affection - when they both softly uttered the words ‘I love you’ followed by the most endearing of smiles from both lads. A passionate kiss sealed their phrase, followed by Nick’s choice of romantic movie.

As they sat there watching the new movie, the room enveloped in a cozy silence, Nick and Charlie relished in the warmth of their relationship. Laughing together, sharing playful moments, and creating memories like these reminded them that this is the love they both deserve.

[quenthel]

My experience with Dragon's Dogma 2 and my thoughts about the true ending (spoilers!)

So first of all I never finished the first game. It just did not captivate me, and I got annoyed by the respawning low level enemies and lack of fast travel. I loved the monster designs and the pawns a lot tho.

Then the second game got announced n I vacillated between getting it and not getting it, while like 90% of my friends were hyping me up. I ended up pre-ordering. I made my pawn after my beloved kittycat Lara.

Dragon's Dogma 2 is very similar to the first game but it feels more polished. The vocations are more fun, the pawns are chattier and cuter, the vibe of the world is a bit more whimsical and sillier than it was. I ended up not minding the low level enemies at all because the combat is just that fun. The npcs are also more charming this time around but the more I played the more I just fell in love with the pawns. The rest of the npcs colored the world, and the game's big quest (aside from continuing the cycle n killing the dragon) is specifically to learn about this world. The pathfinder specifically tells you this the game itself grapes you by the shoulder and invites you to have fun in this light hearted theme park. Kill cool monsters! Meet lovely people! It's very comfy.

BUT THEN the game occasionally has moments that made me feel emotional. And many times these moments were connected to my pawn. When my dear Lara was in danger or dying or in pain in a cutscene it felt meaningful because she is my main pawn. My main traveling companion, my little heal bot. I even presented her to the Sphinx when she asked who I love the most because she is the one always by my side chatting in my ear.

Then I got to the end. And the victory over the dragon felt hollow. Like ok great I did it I saved the world but it's just the same shit right? And where is my pawn? So I triggered the true ending or the beginning of the true ending that breaks the cycle. At first I found this very cool bc I love when games about grand cycles allow you to just upset the order of things... (It was very dark souls like) After I found my pawn sweet Lara again I started taking on the rest of the post game, which was preparing the denizens of the world that it is ending. Lara said she always felt my Arisen's presence like a heartbeat, even while separated.

And as I was facing down the last thing available for me (aside from another quest that glitched out) something very cool happened. The last challenge was killing another of these weird brine dragons, by powering the Gigantus you fight earlier. And it was LARA doing it not my Arisen. And SHE killed the dragon. Like pawns in this game have no free will at all, it's acknowledged many times by the setting. They are mysterious and they exist to help you. They have emotions, and they chitter cutely, but you make them. They are even more doll like than your own player character or all npcs and yet by the end my own pawn was the character I cared for the most. And she started acting without me prompting.

And then it was the end of my journey and I summoned a new proper dragon. And Lara turned into one too (like when pawns get the disease n turn into dragons) but this time she remained aware. And she helped me kill the new dragon. Like the last moment with your poor struggling pawn deciding to help you not because it's their role in this world but because it WANTS to help out of it's free will? That moment will stuck with me for a long time.

And it's such a smart decision too bc your Arisen steps out of the cycle and your pawn your precious companion does too. While the spirit of the game talks about pawns being hollow nothings, your own pawn replies to that that it's not true and it became something because of the player. And this is a game where pawns learn things from you all the time.

Like it just made me think about a lot of things. Fantasy stories and the people in these stories are there to serve a purpose usually (the pathfinder says this exact same thing too). Dragon's Dogma 2 analyzes what it means to exist in one such a story on a level I think. Like it presents you with a beautiful world and with lovely people you can escape to. It's idillyc and you are a hero and you can kill monsters and dragons and you can be so cool. And at first wanting to see the true ending feels like a punishment. Like oh really? You wanted to see this world unravel? Well it's all shit now. All those lovely people are in danger the world is no longer beautiful and everyone is DOOMED. Do you care to struggle? Why do you care to struggle? Do you care for this little doll you made so many hours ago to aid you? Why does it feel meaningful when it gains free will?

I think it's very impactful on a level because I did end up caring a lot. Especially about my pawn transforming into something new. The two of us together remaking the lovely world in which neither of us have a place in...

[seroquelled]

11-8-23

- august invited over bo leach, bodhi nadalin, and some person that didnt have a name but looked like el hanley to play some orgy game, aug was acting kind of weird the whole time and ended up going to bed. the vibes were very off and nameless chick dipped but i talked to bo and bodhi for a while, was trying to figure out if they were together or not. ended up making out with bodhi (felt v nice) and afterward he said a bunch of stuff about how he was glad we saw each other again and that he lives close and wants to hang out again soon. we were still living w/ aj somehow and they had a bunch of random ppl over i remember thinking i was glad i could prove i had other friends by having different ppl over even if they werent really. they were leaving and the other ppl were partying in the living room area and someone ended up giving me a drink so i sat down and hung out a little. it was this really tasty thick deep red cherry-cranberry vodka thing with a ball of hollow ice that had a little hole you could drink more beverage out of it from.

- dk if this was a continuation of the last one or not but walking through the city w a group of girls, being sort of dressed up everyone had on very avant garde fashion (one of them was cheyenne from water st? i dont remember the rest) and we ended up going to this art gallery that was all hallways with various forks in the road. got separated from half the group because they were basically sprinting through and not looking at anything. everything felt like it was moving very fast. came to another fork but on one side was this exhibit area w raised padded flooring and people sitting all around and a sign that said 'puppy naptime.' and. well. it was puppy naptime. there were a bunch of them and phoibe and mama kitty (not bean) were there also sleeping very sweetly and i was worried i would get in trouble for bringing my cats to puppy naptime. i saw a different very small very sleepy black and white dappled kitten and pet her a little bit. was no longer worried bc obv i was not the only one who brought cat. noticed this girl who had a necklace with a bunch of moss and a live snail on it and talked to her abt it and she said it was her pet and he just liked to sleep there too.

- again not sure if at all related but walking through these very bright almost uncanny paved suburban streets w you and coming across a house where you started telling me a story abt how you used to hang out with some boy there and the mom was wack and you would work on some sort of project that required these sharps and one day you accidentally brought some out with you and they (the parents) noticed and yelled at you and you were like little and scared of getting in trouble so you like ran back crying and put them back and were apologizing and then couldnt go back and hang out again. watching this memory play out in the driveway like a phantom in front of us. in present time next to the car in the foliage there were a bunch of varied types of blades and you said something along the lines of 'they feel awesome, btw' and there was one in particular i really wanted to take but we noticed that the people from the house were actually sitting in the car. left and walked the other way around the block to see if theyd leave, just sort of eavesdropped on them from around the corner. along the way there were various blades on the ground and in the little grass strips in front of driveways and i kept picking them up trying to see if they were sharp or new but they all were really flimsy or dull or covered in a weird waxy substances. you said something like 'my skin is thinner so you should just cut me instead' and it made me upset but i wasnt trying to show it and i said some upsetting shit i dont remember and you were like 'jesus christ, what the fuck' and got v distant didnt leave but sort of like hung back and did smth else. heard some sort of commotion from the people and saw the guy yelling at this fluffy, scrawny cat being like 'i hate that fuckin cat' and it ran over to us and i pet him and he was v malnourished and had fleas and scrapes and i felt v sad for him

- Really dont remember this one but some girl inviting us to go rock climbing and it was just this tiny room that was not even very tall and she was actively putting the rock wall together by just. nailing the holds into drywall in no particular order. no gear, no ropes. i was pissed. i remember yelling at her but i dont remember what i said

[seita]

the contract girlfriend | semi eita (m.)

˒ pairing: semi eita/reader ˒ genre: angst, fluff, smut ˒ wordcount: 𝟺𝟹𝟹𝟷 ˒ tags: friends2lovers, fake dating, musician!eita ˒ cw: dirty talk, loss of virginity, virgin kink if u squint: sweet talking, pet names, mean girl ex, mutual pining, unrequited love(?), angst with a happy ending, UNEDITED

+ note: this is a collab along with the other writers for the kkc! i would also like to thank @bokutobabie​ 𝖿for her help with this plot bc it was kickin’ my ass.

˖˖ summary: when he was an unknown musician, his girlfriend left him. now that he’s made it, he wants to make her jealous at a fancy party so he can get her back.unfortunately, he asks you to be his fake date. the downside? you have a very real crush on him.

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collab masterlist!

© all content belongs to seita 2020. do not modify or repost.

“I have a proposition,” is never a sentence you want to hear when you sit down to lunch with your best friend. Especially when that friend is Semi Eita. 

“What..?” you ask apprehensively, taking the cup of coffee he’d obviously gotten to bribe you. You took it regardless, not willing to pass up the offer of free coffee.

“Nana is gonna be at the party this weekend,” he muttered, swirling his fingertips around the rim of his cup. You felt your heart drop into the pit of your stomach at his words, “I want you to come and pretend to be my date.”

Just as you’d expected. Not something you wanted to hear.

Nana was Eita’s first love, his first serious relationship, really. They got together when he was fresh out of highschool, the two of them spending almost all of their time together. 

It was when his career as a musician was just beginning, he was playing small gigs and there was nothing really successful. But he was happy. And he thought she was too.

Until she dumped him in favor of a much more famous man. He was a big movie producer and offered her a leading role in an upcoming film. Of course, she took the offer. 

She would much rather be mingling with the rich and famous than be hanging out with “a nobody like him”, as she put it. You remembered the hurt Eita felt, the tears and heartbreak it took almost 3 years for him to get over. 

“Why?” you finally asked with a sigh, “What will that accomplish?”

“Well if she gets jealous, she might want to get back with me,” he grinned impishly, shrugging his shoulders like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

You recognized the look in his eyes, one of determination. So you sighed, nodding your head, “Alright, I’ll be your date.”

He beamed, uttering out endless thanks to you as you went on with your lunch until he decided to go back to the studio. He slipped his hat on low, making sure his mask was in place before hugging your goodbye and leaving you sitting alone at the table. 

You sighed, downing the last of your coffee. Your spirits were low; you had no idea what to expect from this party. 

Would she fall for it and run back into his arms now that he had had his big breakthrough and became mainstream? She surely must have known by now; his band was already breaking records, wracking up fans by the thousands, his songs were being played on the radio. 

Maybe now that he was famous enough, she’d actually want to be with him. Not that she deserved him. And he didn’t deserve someone like that, either. He was too good for her, too good to be treated like that. 

You let out another sigh and stood up, grabbing your purse from the back of the chair.

This was going to be painful. You weren’t sure how you would cope with pretending to be his girlfriend all for the sake of him getting back with her. 

Surely your heart wouldn’t be able to take it.

Because as much as you tried to hide it, you were irrevocably in love with your best friend.

The entire getup was supplied to you by Eita; from the jewelry to the dress itself. You felt like a different person. Despite the fact he was your best friend, you hadn’t attended one of the big parties since his band’s breakout single. 

This particular party wasn’t in celebration of his band, but he was invited regardless so naturally he went. He was still enjoying the high life and was getting used to tasting fame. You were glad it hadn’t actually affected his personality. 

“You look nice today,” Tendou complimented with a breezy smile. He was nursing a glass of champagne, which was uncharacteristic to say the least. He had always been more of a whiskey kind of guy.

“Thanks,” you shrugged, “I’m not really a fan of this kind of thing.”

“I know,” he grinned, “You look terribly uncomfortable, that’s why I came over to be such a good pal and keep you company while your darling boyfriend is off galavanting with the people!”

You rolled your eyes, “He’s not my boyfriend, Satori.”

He giggled, taking glee in your embarrassment, “But you wish he was.”

“Are you already drunk?” you raise a brow, making him snicker.

Someone called his name from the crowd and he flashed you a knowing grin, “Eita may be too dim to see it, but the rest of us aren’t!”

You pout and find yourself alone once again. Looking around, you search for your ‘boyfriend’. Suddenly, a heavy arm falls across your shoulders and the familiar scent of his cologne reaches your nose. 

“Hey, babygirl,” he coos, making your heart skip a beat at the pet name. He sounds so fond and you feel yourself smiling before he busts out laughing, shaking his head before letting his arm fall from your shoulders, “That’s just so weird. I dunno if I’ll be able to get through this tonight,” Ouch. “Anyway, Nana just arrived so…” he takes your hand but you can’t bring yourself to smile as you feel the ache in your heart at his words.

If he takes note of your deflated behavior, he doesn’t say anything, merely leading you over to the balcony. You breathe in the fresh air and feel the ache in your chest dull.

“Eita? Is that you?” a perky voice makes you cringe. 

“Nana,” Eita breathes, tugging you against his side as she breaks through the crowd to stand in front of the two of you.

Her smile promptly disappears at the sight of you crowded in Eita’s arms.

“Eita...who’s this?” she asks, a smile returning but you can tell it’s plastic. 

You remembered everything you had gone over with him before the party; the two of you had sat down for a few hours to sort out your story and rules. It had felt like you were making a binding contract with him when you told him no kissing on the lips. It was your only stipulation and you swore you saw a brief downward tug of his lips when you told him before he beamed and readily agreed. 

Maybe you were imagining that disappointment in his eyes too. 

“This is my girlfriend, _____,” Eita introduced, giving your arm an affectionate squeeze.

“Oh,” she gave you a strained smile and held out her hand for you to shake. When you slipped your hand into hers, she gave it a tense squeeze that made you flinch, “I’m Nana, Eita’s ex.”

“I’ve uh…” you cleared your throat and pulled your hand away, “I’ve heard stories about you.”

“All good I’m sure,” she replied flippantly before setting her sights on him once more, “We should totally catch up, you know? Reminisce about the good old times~”

The sultry, flirtatious undertone made your skin crawl. Even if you weren’t really dating, she thought you were and for her to not respect that made you angry. But still, Eita pulled away and placed a kiss against your temple that set your heart ablaze.

“Sure, why not?” he grinned and gave your hand a squeeze, “You go have some fun, sweetheart. I’ll catch up with you later.”

You gave him a hollow wave as he quickly vanished into the crowd without a second glance your way. You knew this was the end goal but still, to see him walking away hurt. A sense of rejection was seeded within you and you felt your spirits slowly being crushed. 

It took all your power to continue on with the party until it felt acceptable to leave. Throughout the party, you kept getting glances of the two of them. 

Eita wore a serene smile, his eyes sparkling as he looked at her. Whenever she looked at him with a flirtatious smile and a subtle caress, you felt jealousy pool in the core of your stomach. You wanted to march over there and scream “he’s mine!”. But you couldn’t, because he wasn’t really yours. 

He was only pretending to be yours so he could have her. 

Your phone vibrated as you downed your final glass of wine, making you look at the screen with a frown.

“I’m heading to Nana’s apartment for the night! See if Satori can give you a ride home, thanks for the help!!”

Your jaw ached from how hard you were forcing yourself to keep from crying. When you tried to find the elusive redhead, you found he was drunk and dancing with two girls so you decided to leave him be and simply call an Uber. 

For just a short time, you had simply been a contract girlfriend for him to use. Though you knew it was fake, it still felt so nice to be called his. 

So you went home, removing your expensive clothing like Cinderella after the ball and decided to relax on the couch. It was only a little past midnight when you got out of the shower, turning on the TV to watch whatever late night nonsense was playing. 

Eita thought that being with Nana again would be everything he wanted. But as he laid beside her, her head resting on his naked chest, strangely all he could think of was you. 

When he asked you to pretend to be his date, he hadn’t thought of the possibility of how it would really feel. Sure, he had touched you before, naturally. Sometimes he hugged you and held your hand. But that night, when he placed the kiss against your head, the way your eyes lit up in response had his heart stuttering when he thought back to it. 

Truth be told, when you told him he couldn’t kiss you he felt so...disappointed. He had thought of assigning the same rule but decided against it at the last moment, secretly thinking about how nice it may feel to kiss you. 

He had quickly dashed that though because of how wrong it was to think of you like that. 

Yet there he was, thinking of you with his ex girlfriend back in his arms again.

“Eita?” Nana asked, lifting her head to look drowsily at him, “Are you okay?”

“Um...yeah,” he clears his throat, “I should probably get going.”

“Why?” she whines, “Don’t worry about her.”

“Huh? Who?” he asks, confused.

She giggles and clings to his arm, “Your girlfriend! She doesn’t have to know!”

His heart ached at those words -- true, you weren’t really dating but he felt like he had done something wrong. And for some reason Nana’s blatant disregard that he had cheated with her made him nauseous.

“I...I just want to see if she made it home safely,” he gave her a tight lipped smile and picked up his phone. 

She rested against the pillow, head propped up on her hand as she watched him dial you. When you didn’t answer, he gave a frustrated sigh and dialed Satori instead. 

It rang a few times before the slurred voice of his best friend answered, “H-Hey man, what’s up?”

“Satori, did you drop _____ off okay?” Eita asked.

The redhead made a confused sound over the line, “What’re you talkin’ about? She never asked me to take her anywhere.”

“What?” Eita frowned, “Did you see her leave the party?”

“Gotta tell ya, man, I wasn’t watchin’ her,” Tendou replied, a feminine giggle in the background making Eita frown, “Wasn’t that supposed to be your job?”

Eita sighed, shaking his head, “Alright, dude, just...let me know if you hear from her.”

“Hah? Why would she call me?” Satori chuckled, “Why don’t you just check on her? Better safe than sorry...I mean, she’s a cute girl, you never know what kinda scoundrels were eyeing her in that pretty little dress tonight. If i was a less honorable friend, she would be the one in my bed right now!”

Eita scoffed and hung up as his friend started cackling gleefully over the line. Eita stood up, shaking off Nana’s grabby hands as he slipped his jeans back on.

“You’re not going back to her, are you?” she pouted.

Eita sighed, “I gotta check on her. No one knows where she went off to.”

“She’s a big girl, c’mon Eita~” she purred, letting the sheet fall from her bare body as she crawled towards him.

He shook his head and threw his shirt on, grabbing his keys off of her dresser before moving to the door, “I gotta see her.”

He ignored her obnoxious whining as he bolted out the door. Any sleepiness that was in his system had evaporated at the worry he felt over you. 

The drive to your apartment was quick enough, it went by in a blur. He took two steps at a time up to your place on the 3r floor, not patient enough to wait for the elevator. 

The knock on your door made you jump. Throwing the pillow you held in your lap aside, you checked through the peephole to see a familiar head of sandy blonde hair. 

Pulling the door opened, you looked at him with wide eyes, “Eita? Aren’t you supposed to be with--”

“I couldn’t get a hold of you,” he breathed, stepping past you to enter your living room.

“And?” you laughed, shrugging your shoulders.

“I got worried! Why didn’t you go home with Satori?” he sighed, sitting on your couch with a huff.

You chuckled again, though it was humorless, “He looked like he was having fun, I didn’t want to impose.”

He sighs and relaxes against the couch. As you sit next to him, for a second things feel normal. 

You almost feel okay, as if you could forget about everything happening. It’s so easy to forget your crush on your best friend and the fact he wanted to be with another woman. 

It was easy to forget it all until it came rushing back into your face in the form of Nana. 

You and Eita were having a lunch date, as was normal for the two of you. Unfortunately, amid his retelling of a story you had heard a million times over, she showed up with an obnoxious screech of his name.

“Eita!” she squealed and rushed over to him, throwing her arms around his shoulders. 

You let out a soft sigh, your eyes falling to your half-finished plate.

“Nana…” he greeted, eyes wide in shock, “H-How did you find me? What’re you doing here?”

“I wanted to see you, silly!” she chirped, taking a seat in his lap in a way that was far too comfortable. Suddenly, her gaze shifted to you and the smile vanished off of her face, “Oh, you’re here.”

“Nana…” Eita sighed but didn’t make any move to get off of him.

“What? I thought you were going to break up with her?” she whined loudly, making your cheeks burn as people looked over at the two of you, “You said you were going to dump her!”

“I--” Eita started.

“You should go,” Nana grinned at you, shrugging her shoulders as she hugged Eita closer to her, “Seriously, he’s mine now. He was fucking me at that party instead of you.”

Although nothing about your relationship that night was real, the humiliation you felt at that very moment was. She was smug that she had gotten your boyfriend to cheat on you and was making a spectacle of her victory. 

Biting your lip, you reached behind you to grab your purse, “I-I’ll see you later, Eita.”

“______ wait!” he called but you were already rushing towards the entrance. 

You had no idea that he was hot on your heels until you reached your apartment. You went to close it only for the foot to intercept it. Looking over your shoulder, you found Eita panting before he was pushing the door open completely.

“_____ I--” he paused, “Why are you crying?”

“I am?” you wiped under your eyes and frowned when you felt the moisture there, promptly wiping it away, “Sh-She completely made a fool of me, Eita. I don’t know what you ever saw in her and I don’t know why I helped you get back with her.”

“I know, look…” he ran a hand through his already messed up hair, “I feel the same, alright? I’m sorry I pulled you into all this, _____, I really am. Alright, I told her to get lost.”

You sighed and took a seat on your couch, “She only wanted you back because you’re famous now. You know that right?”

He chuckled and sat down, nodding his head, “I guess I was just...hoping for something I guess.”

“What?” you asked.

He shrugged, “I don’t really remember anymore,” he confessed. 

“Well,” you didn’t quite know what to say, simply leaning back on the couch to appear relaxed, “I always wondered why you didn’t date after her anyway.”

He shrugged once more. How was he meant to say that he didn’t want anyone impeding on his time with you? 

“I guess...no one really came along, you know?”

You nodded, “I guess it’s the same for me.”

He snorted, “You’ve never even dated anyone before.”

“You don’t have to bring that up!” you whined, playfully shoving his shoulder.

He laughed, melodic and pretty, “I think it’s cute. What’s your story then?”

“Eita, we’ve been friends since high school, you know everything about me,” you smiled, feeling your cheeks warm at the soft look he was giving you.

“Yeah but…” he bit his lip, fingers inching closer towards you, “You’re...pretty and sweet. There’s plenty of good looking guys around me that have tried flirting with you before. Hell, Satori even said he was into you.”

You smiled and shook your head, “No, none of them are right…”

“Who is right then?” he asked, unable to hide the hopefulness in his voice.

“Eita…” the smile falls from your lips, your heart hammering in your chest as he moved closer towards you, “I…”

“Hm?” he hummed, his nose brushing against yours, breath fanning over your lips.

“I...I won’t regret this, will I?” you asked. 

His breathing stuttered against your skin and he shook his head, bringing his hand up to cup your cheek, “You won’t.”

After those words left his mouth, he brought your lips to his in a sweet kiss that was perfect for a first. You could tell he was experienced, knowing exactly how to move. 

There was something sweet lingering on his tongue that you found utterly addictive. 

You wish you could find it strange or even scary to wind up in bed with your best friend. The fact your entire relationship was going to be changing should have concerned you but all you felt was anticipation. 

He hovered over your body, the two of you stripping your clothes with unhurried ease. His body was firm from working out, a habit he never let go of from his time as a volleyball player. 

His hands were calloused and warm as they touched your body, caressing your breasts in a way no one ever had. The feeling of him thumbing over your nipples had your back arching in arousal, your panties becoming soaked embarrassingly fast. 

He was hard and throbbing in his jeans, the constricting material almost painful but all he really cared about in that moment was seeing all of you. 

Hooking his thumbs into the band of your panties, he pulled the material down. He cursed under his breath at the strings of slick that attached to the fabric. 

“You’re so wet,” he breathed, licking his lips as he tossed your panties over his shoulder to be lost somewhere in your room. 

“Sh-Shut up, don’t tease me…” you mumble, feeling embarrassed by your body’s own reaction to him.

He smiles, pressing a soft kiss against your knee, “I’m not, baby. It’s sweet...I love knowing you react so honestly to me.”

“Eita…” you whined, reaching up to cover your face as he spread your legs.

“Hmm?” he bites his lip, sliding two fingers between your folds to spread them apart. 

Your hole clenched around nothing, drooling more slick for him to gather on his fingertips. He used it to rub smooth circles around your clit, the sweet moan that fell from your lips at the pleasure he so easily gave you. 

“I’ll get you nice and prepped, baby,” he cooed, the nickname making your heart soar. 

You were so wet, making it easy for him to slide two thick fingers into your pretty cunt. You clamped down tight around the digits, making his cock throb at the mere thought of what that would feel like around his hard cock. 

Twisting his wrist, he crooked his fingers up to hit your sweet spot, his thumb coming up to circle around your clit. The inexperience of your body made it so easy for him to bring you to the edge. 

You had never felt this, no one had ever touched you so intimately so your body was more reactive than ever. 

Reaching down, you wrapped your hand around his wrist, meeting his gaze with wide eyes. He smiled, capturing his bottom lip between his teeth.

“You cumming?” he asked, though he could very easily feel your walls spasming around him. 

Still, you nodded, mouth falling open but no sound escaping, “E-Eita…”

“C’mon, baby,” he groaned, fasting his pace to fuck your dripping cunt. The sounds were wet, lewd and if you were with anyone else you would have been completely ashamed. But it was Eita, the person you trusted the most in the world. He groaned as your body began to quake, “Let it go, pretty girl. Cum for me, that’s it.”

At his encouragement, you released with a shrill whine of his name. He eagerly fucked your gushing cunt through the high, only slowing when your back met the bed again. 

Pulling his fingers from your hole, he was mindful of your sensitivity. He still couldn’t resist placing a fleeting kiss against your throbbing clit before sitting up to meet you for another heated kiss. 

Your body was still trembling as you wrapped your arms around his neck, your thighs spread open around his waist. His clothed cock hovered above your sensitive core and he made sure the rough material of his jeans didn’t make contact.

“Please, Eita, c-can we…?” you asked, biting your lip, too embarrassed to utter the words.

He smiled and nodded, brushing some hair behind your ear before sitting up to discard the remaining clothing on his person. His skin was pretty, tanned and built. His cock reached his navel, dripping precum down the length which he used to easily slick his cock up with his fist. 

The sight of your best friend jerking himself off over your naked, trembling body felt beyond taboo. But it only made you more eager to have him. 

“Please, Eita...I want you,” you breathed. 

He flashed you a smile and sat up on his knees, sliding the dripping tip between your folds. Brushing past your clit, you whined at the sensitivity. 

“It might hurt a bit, pretty baby,” he whispered, positioning himself at your entrance. 

You had already guessed it. He was big just by looking at him. But nothing compared to when he began to sink into you -- that’s when his size really became apparent. 

“Ah, Eita!” you whined, digging your nails into his shoulders.

He hissed but didn’t stop you, eyes falling to where his cock was steadily stretching you open. When he got halfway in, he pulled back until the head remained within your clasping walls. With an experienced roll of his hips, he pushed his cock back in, this time easily bottoming out. 

“Fuck!” you squealed, back arching. 

He could feel you gushing, dripping down his balls. There wasn’t a single sign of pain in your features so he quickly began to move, the both of you riled up and eager to have each other completely. 

Everything felt so right, so sweet. Having him in your arms made you feel so happy. 

“You’re mine now, baby,” he groaned, burying his face in your neck, “All mine. N-No more, fuck, of this friend shit...I love you.”

“Eita,” you whined, tears pricking your eyes as you hugged him tightly against you, “I love you too. P-Please make me cum.”

“Fuck, I’ll get you there, baby,” he promised, reaching between your bodies to find your clit. Your walls immediately clamped tight around him as he played with your little bud, “C’mon. Cum for me. I wanna feel you cream, pretty baby. Can you do that for me? Show me how good this cock makes you cum.”

His filthy words, whispered in his sweet, deep voice were enough to throw you over the edge. As you squeezed around him, trembling and gushing through the amazing orgasm, he spilled within you. A soft whimper of your name fell from his lips as his balls throbbed, cock spitting out load after load until you were so filled, it dripped from your cunt. 

Finally, the both of you stilled. He leaned back to look in your eyes, tucking some damp hair behind your ear before pecking your lips. 

“I meant it, you really are mine now,” he said.

You nodded, “You’re all mine too.”

“Well,” he gave you a teasing grin, “You have to share me with my millions of adoring fans.”

“Don’t be so full of yourself,” you giggled, biting your lip as he pulled out, “You have thousands at most.”

“Oh, way to bruise a guy’s ego,” he laughed.

You were grateful to have him, everything with him was so easy. Everything between you was fine, perfect even. And you didn’t have to worry about ever losing him to another girl again.

[founderscouncil]

this is much less thought through compared to my list for hope and tbh, i’m lowkey considering doing a full rewatch of tvd/to to help get some more ideas, so these are even more generic 

bonnie

for the love of all that is the tiniest bit holy, give bonnie one of those ships. you know which ones i’m talking about!! i genuinely don’t think i have a notp for her and my interpretation is very morally gray (so lowwwwwkey give her someone who appeals to that darkness a bit maybe?), idk mostly just give her some happiness??

jeremy

jeremy’s bisexual awakening (you think i’m joking but we all know it was tyler lockwood)

grumpy hunter jeremy who randomly shows up at salvatore once a month to drag alaric out and makes sure he showers and gets away from the school before dumping him at damon and elena’s for the day

uncle jeremy with his favorite pseudo-nieces, josie and lizzie

coda

either hayley or even keelin taking coda under their wing after they learn of the aftermath of the hollow’s rampage. could be one of the many reasons hayley really takes a leadership role after the mikaelsons split up after TO S4

if you don’t acknowledge the hollow storyline, coda’s backstory could be changed up so that she was orphaned when kingmaker development hunted down the pack while they were cursed by dahlia. either way, the idea is that her story touches on themes of community and generosity, while she also plays a foil to hope, as someone who lost everything due to the mikaelsons’ story but she still has to find a way to move on anyways

coda at salvatore and interacting with the squad bc that would be fun. maybe she gets sent with henry and hope when they’re seven, maybe she shows up after hope is revealed to be a mikaelson, but interesting to see how the squad reacts to someone who has known hope in a completely different context

coda just annoying hope. the end.

elijah

series of letters over the years between elijah and hope, hayley, rebekah, freya, klaus, anyone after the events of to s4. please do not make this man suffer alone with his thoughts. he will go through so many home improvement projects that the south of france will look like a completely rebuilt area by the time he’s done.

post-series threads where elijah lurks like a maddeningly well-dressed english professor near whitmore and spoils his niece (but also bc it’s me, he’s probably doing research on how to eliminate all threats ever and also how to stick hope in a magical bubble without her knowledge)

freya

idk to even call this an au or a divergent verse or what but imagining a ship (prob a vampire?) where it’s a slow burn of finding each other every century, dodging dahlia, the angst of only having one year together at a time, etc etc etc. she lived through so much but also not really? so it’d be half period au in the way we can jump all over the timeline (basically anything post her baby dying), half canon-compliant? like eventually we could sync up with canon and introduce the rest of the mikaelsons and see what spins up from there? does this make sense to anyone other than my brain lmao? 

vampire freya - either she turned so klaus could stay with hayley and hope after to s4 or one of the family’s enemies catches up to her and forces a turn to remove their magical help, or some other way, she’s undead now. it’s bittersweet because she sorely misses her magic but at the same time, she doesn’t have to grow old without her siblings either. she doesn’t know what to think about it, but she has to figure it out eventually. 

alternatively, she got turned into a vampire sometime before the series starts and she was able to live life freely away from dahlia for the first time in her life, and she doesn’t have to worry about having a child anymore, which makes her effectively useless to her aunt now, but once hope is born, freya has to actually meet her family and try to convince them that she is who she says she is, idk that’s all i’ve got rn

hayley

verses where hayley never died, verses where hayley is resurrected, verses where hayley is the best mom for hope, anything that lets her have the life with hope that she deserves. 

hayley / caroline / klaus co-parenting shenanigans. make it poly if so inclined.

keelin

slow burn freelin. a version where keelin is actually around in the years during the hollow because as wanderlust-y as she is, she’s not going to just abandon freya like please

keelin talking to hayley (or any other werewolf) about their differences in opinions about the wolf. keelin remembers her entire family being hunted down by lucien castle and how being a wolf never brought her anything but pain, yet at the same time, she does feel a disconnect to a huge part of who she is. someone to help her bridge that gap and her fear and showing her that her wolf side isn’t something to be feared or shunned

vincent

things with freya and/or keelin. nik could exist or not, i just enjoy that relationship a lot

the city holding vincent responsible for the hollow’s initial bid for power, and maybe he can’t be removed as regent but exploring a broken trust (especially in the years between s4 and s5) and how he has to overcome that to win back people’s backing

[datastate]

im basic but like,, hk for the ask game please?

you’re fine! thank you :]

favorite character:

objectively? probably quirrel! i love how his story and ghost’s intertwine, and the scenes with him throughout the game on your first playthrough really do add a lot more. hollow knight does such a good job mixing both game and story elements; you can tell in his first interaction that he is going to be an important person simply based on his location, and it becomes so much clearer later on as well. the scene w monomon... literally made me go “hold on a second man. hold on a second.” because... pain <3 love it tho

second favorite character:

hornet!!! her whole deal makes me SO sad. herrah gave her life for hornet, thinking that even after she was gone that the most duty hornet would carry would be ruling deepnest, but instead hornet has to take on both of her parents’ mantles and she doesn’t take it lightly. herrah’s sacrifice was for nothing, but hornet still acknowledges that her intentions were good. the realization that hornet is herrah’s child is just. gd. it hurts me. you go into herrah’s dreamnail dialogue saying “for her,” and then hornet saying she doesn’t blame herrah for leaving her..... idk. i have a lot of thoughts between hornet’s situation + herrah’s intention and how they think of each other now, but i am not articulate rn ahbvsmdg it just hurts me

least favorite character:

willoh scares me

no but really moss prophet can go fuck themself boo i hate that clown you had it coming you’re like every christian preacher i’ve ever met. you’re literally soul master before he went on that killing spree

the character i’m most like:

laughs nervously in thk

favorite pairing:

ZE’MER AND THE TRAITORS’ DAUGHTER... i know we have almost nothing on them in-game that isn’t fucking depressing bc ze’mer’s been reduced to the grey mourner, but just. they’re a really big comfort for me. whenever i see art or writing of them, i just

also sheo / the nailsmith... happy couple indeed. ik these r just the canon gay pairings but it’s still. it’s really nice having that rep and it’s done well!!!! considering that most of hallownest has gone to hell ahbvsmdgs

ALSO also. and ik i’m just listing all the canon couples at this point, but i love iselda/cornifer... the potential in their stories?? iselda’s wanting to travel w cornifer again. idk. ijust. <3 and i have ideas on how they met w cornifer being THE smartest dumbass and her being genuinely experienced. i love these two so much. they r my mom n dad

least favorite pairing (other than usual condemnable shit):

can we all agree grimm/pk is weird as hell. you literally got a “i only tend to dead / dying kingdoms, putting them to rest so something new will be able to grow in its place” while pk is like “if i don’t craft / unite a kingdom from nothing i WILL die. again.” i get they’re ‘opposites’ and they’ve both got the rebirth thing going on, but like... c’mon... their ideals directly contradict each other and neither one is gonna change anytime soon, it can’t even be enemies to lovers.

favorite moment:

seeing hornet after killing herrah.

rating: 10/10!!! one of, if not THE, best games i’ve played in years

[lexicals]

Liner notes for An Echo, An Answer

Okay let's give this a go I guess? I may add more to this if I remember things too lol

Fair warning this is an exceedingly long post. It has ~subheadings~ (ooh). These cover: 

Fun Facts

Notes about mira

Notes on actual writing/plot

Post-canon tidbits (to be supplemented by actual post-canon oneshot coming maybe not soon but definitely at some point probably)

Needless to say this contains some BIG OL’ SPOILERS. Please enjoy o:

Some general Fun Facts™:

When I posted the first few chapters of this fic, I didn't have a fucking clue where it was going. I didn't even know how kravitz died until I'd already posted like 10 chapters lmao. This was a stressful way to write and I am never doing that again

In terms of inspo, I remember there being a fic in which taako was a ghost and kravitz was a medium (if anyone knows what fic this is PLEASE tell me I cannot find it) and I think I subconsciously took inspiration from this. Also I’d already written a vampire au and I wanted more undead boyfriend shenanigans, I looove playing with the liminal aspects of kravitz being a dead-but-not-dead character

There was a goof version of this fic where kravitz wasn't from the 1900s at all and died in like. The early 2000s or something. He died having come back from/at a costume party, people assumed he was an actual ye olde victorian ghost, and he decided to just lean into it. Cue fake accent. This was scrapped mainly because I loved the ‘sleepy hollow’-esque man-out-of-time shenanigans way too much and also because I know very little about the early-2000s US but do you know what I do know a moderate amount about? 1900s england

I have not read the cask of amontillado and I did not know what it was until seeing the memes, which was after I wrote the basement body twist. I just wanted to have a cheesy secret basement behind a bookcase c'mon it's a murder mystery in an old spooky house let me have this

Anyone who's followed my content for a while probably knows that I'm a big trans kravitz stan, but I dithered over making him trans in this fic a Lot. This was mostly down to self-doubt abt a story ft. a trans man living as his preferred gender in that time period would be deemed "unrealistic" but in the end I said fuck it I want this & I think that was the correct move. Also I read a fair bit about absolute legend dr james barry & that made me a bit more confident about committing to the decision bc these people did exist & they deserve their rep

You may notice that all of the major OCs created for this fic are women. This was an accident but also I stand by it bc I think it helps to balance out the fact that so much of the ‘screentime’ is being dominated by the male leads (inc. angus, who probably has the 3rd most screentime after taako & krav). They’re also all just, absolutely indomitable people. I have a type when it comes to OCs. Speaking of:

Notes on mira:

Mira was very much a character created to serve a purpose, but she ended up becoming a lot more than that and I'm glad people warmed up to her while reading as much as I did while writing. She wasn't going to have anywhere near as much screen time initially as she did in the end but I just loved her & how her relationship with kravitz turned out so much that I ended up writing a bunch of snippets with the two of them just for me, which eventually turned into the fragment chapters because I wanted to share how gd cute they were. Also they ended up being pretty useful for plot too lol

She and flossy were actually kind of the same character to begin with, being kravitz's best friend who he lived with in a kind of lavender marriage with neither of them interested in the other but being happy enough being friends & pretending. I scrapped this pretty early for a lot of reasons but she was still the cause of his death in that version, whether or not she actively killed him. I think there was a gambling debts element at some point

Whatever iteration of the story, she was always going to be the cause of death. I ruled out actual murder pretty early on because I didn't want to tell a story about a gay, black trans man getting murdered in cold blood in his own home, which in a ghost story only really leaves manslaughter, and an accidental killing by a loved one was an idea that followed pretty hot on the heels of that decision - it's very sad, but there's no hatred behind it, so it's not too outright depressing for what is most likely an audience with a high population of marginalised people. That bittersweetness of tone - sad events, but almost always with loving intentions behind or around them - ended up being a real touchstone for the story as a whole

In terms of post-canon content for her, or I guess just stuff that wasn't mentioned in-fic lol, my idea of how her life played out is that she was a pretty solid pillar of her community for a very long time. She took what kravitz said about thinking about what she wanted to add to the world very much to heart, and her answer was for her to be to as many kids and vulnerable people as possible what kravitz was to her. Obviously in the end she poured a lot of herself into helping others out of guilt for having killed a man who she likely remembered a little rose-tinted, but the intent was always there before that too

I don't know how much this came across in the actual text but mira is mixed race (Black/white), though she is Black-coded in terms of how people see and respond to her (please tell me if I’m using these terms incorrectly). I downplayed a lot of the racial elements of this fic bc I don’t feel like it’s my place as a white writer to delve into those areas, but it is an element of her story that ties into anti-miscegenation laws and general societal attitudes and I didn’t just want to entirely gloss over those aspects, bc that wouldn’t be right of me either, so I can only hope the balance ended up working here, and for kravitz’s story too. I did a lot of the writing for mira’s story before even really thinking about this angle which is something I’ve learnt from now bc oh boy should I have thought about it sooner lmao........

Anyway. I love her. I’m very glad that other people love her too

In terms of story writing:

I used to watch A LOT of crime dramas when I was younger, and got so familiar with the structure of them that I used to predict who the killer was going to be about a quarter of the way into them almost every time. Most of the time the killer is someone introduced early on as someone fairly innocuous, but still notable, before the narrative doubles down on a red herring suspect who's proven innocent about 3/4 of the way through, paving the way for the real twist killer. You see where I took my base structure from here

So, mira is introduced early on as someone important to kravitz, who was involved in his life (& death) somehow, but in general she's more suggested to be a victim than a culprit - because of course she is, she’s a child and she loves him! I'm only just realising now that this is a "person of interest" style plot twist here. (Remember what I said about the crime dramas? Just so many of them.) But then in the end she suffered just as much as anyone else, so I guess you could say she's both a victim and a culprit, even by accident.......

Structurally I'm actually really happy with how this turned out. In my head (BECAUSE OH BOY I DID NOT WRITE ANY OF THIS DOWN! Or at least not in a coherent way) the story was split into three mini arcs - the enemies section ending with the kitchen blowout, the friends section ending with the the bay window scene, and the lovers section which covers the rest of the fic. This ended up integrating really well with the main mysteries/pulls of the story - the first being the will-they-won't-they (they will, it’s fanfiction, but how?) of the romance element, and then once that's tapering off starting to dig more into the murder mystery element, which had been more of a subplot up until then, while the romance moves onto the back burner a little bit. The dual genre was an interesting challenge to try to balance and I think it turned out pretty well!

While I'm on this, setting up my breadcrumb trails for the plot twists was simultaneously very stressful and very rewarding. Trying to keep things obvious enough to be noted but subtle enough not to give the whole game away? Gave me so many headaches lmao. I actually thought for sure that some people would twig about the body in the cellar sooner than ch42, but then actually in ch42 way more people picked up on fisher's sniffing around than I expected. Clues are hard!! But at the same time seeing the handful of people who called mira as an adoptive daughter, or the fact that krav fell down the stairs, or the fact that mira's og parents were involved was very cool and it made me very happy to see people picking up the little stuff and putting it together

QUITE A FEW PEOPLE SAID NICE THINGS TO ME ABOUT HOW CLEVER THE PIANO TUNING ANGLE WAS. I CANNOT TAKE COMPLETE CREDIT FOR THIS. IT WAS A PLOT HOLE THAT I SUDDENLY REGISTERED OUT OF NOWHERE WHILE I WAS IN THE SHOWER & THEN ENDED UP WORKING IN SO I GUESS IT TURNED OUT FOR THE BEST & MADE ME LOOK VERY SMART BUT IT WAS AN ACCIDENT

Something else that a couple of people have noted & that I only realised in the process of writing was the fact that a lot of kravitz's ghostliness in this fic has the potential to be read as an allegory for chronic illness/disability. This was something I only caught onto myself while I was writing the scene on the porch at the end of ch42 when I was writing kravitz's dialogue and was like..... oh shit that's a thing huh. Bc he is, y'know, quite literally housebound and limited in what he can do in a lot of ways, which is part of the reason I really tried to hammer home in that chapter that even though the fic ends with him being 'cured' (because that ending was always the intention from day one before I ever thought about this reading), they would have been happy together regardless. Love is not conditional!

Post-canon thoughts:

Taako and kravitz go into the house. Kravitz says oh my god what is that smell. Taako says he made blueberry pie earlier. Kravitz says okay we're putting bedroom fun times on hold I need that RIGHT NOW

Kravitz eats way too much too fast and spends the rest of the afternoon curled up on the sofa with a horrible stomach ache. He is not used to that much rich food. Taako is not impressed with this

He rolls his eyes and they watch a movie and talk instead and get to the bedroom fun times later

On the topic of food you Know krav ends up with a bit of a tummy from taako spoiling him. He looks & feels great and taako loves how comfy he is

Also on the topic of bodies I think krav does a lot of experimenting initially with what feels good now that he has a lot more freedom in presentation. He likes to mess with his hair a lot. Dresses and skirts are still a bad feel but a little makeup is fun sometimes. Kravitz living his best undeath 2k18 (I took so long to finish this fic it’s set 2 years ago now lmaoooo)

Kravitz lets taako drive him somewhere exactly Once before vowing NEVER AGAIN taako's driving privileges are REVOKED kravitz is going to get magnus to teach him to drive instead.

Taako says what the hell are you gonna do if you get pulled over you are a hundred and thirty and also dead you can't get a license. (He could get him a fake one, but he's not going to, because he's being petty about kravitz insulting his driving.) Kravitz says fine show me yours then. Taako says no but kravitz steals it anyway. A minute later he’s produced his own undoubtedly fake license out of nowhere complete with a fake DOB and a very nice picture

Taako says gasp kravitz that's ILLEGAL. Also you know you have to make this picture worse if you want it to be convincing right

Kravitz starts giving angus music lessons. Angus isn’t a natural by any means but he works hard and that gets him a long way

OH ACTUALLY I SHOULD PROBABLY SAY SMTH ABOUT THE REUNIONS HUH. GINNY THESE ARE FOR YOU:

Maybe it's weird to start with barry but the poor man has to have a sit down. He has so many questions. Kravitz what is the afterlife like it's fine you can tell him just give him a hint please and also can he maybe get like. A blood sample or something. No that's not weird it's for science what are you talking about taako bring him back

Kravitz is fully expecting lup to wreck his shit, and she acts like she's going to right up until she's close enough to give him a big ol hug instead. She says she missed him a lot & that he's much nicer to hug now that he's not a freezy boy, and kravitz goes ;_;

It's a very tight hug though. In some ways it is still a punishment

Also could he maybe hook her up with this death goddess of his? Lup would like to be immortal too, kravitz. Kravitz can you get a resume to your boss and could you write lup a reference while you're at it

Angus!! He’s so happy to have his other uncle back!! There’s a new caleb cleveland book he needs to read so they can talk about it!! All of this after a lot of crying and hugging.

I think at some point they do go over to visit mira’s descendants. Taako says hi remember me? I brought my boyfriend to visit! Unnamed great great grandchild #1 is like um he looks kind of familiar. Kravitz says well yes there is kind of a reason for that and it’s because I’m in that picture on the wall over there, hi I’m your great great grandfather nice to meet you

The family is a little weirded out by this at first but eventually they’re like. Well alright I guess do you want a coffee

Kravitz says yes please god do you know how many people keep offering me tea

He babysits for the youngest ones sometimes. The kids love him and the adults are happy to give him stories in exchange for his time, seeing as that’s all he asks for

Taako says ask them for money and contribute to this household kravitz. Kravitz says absolutely not they’re family and you’re already getting my youtube ad revenue

Yes kravitz has a youtube channel and is also very involved in the local music scene. He can’t do anything that would technically be classed as interfering with the flow of the living world but no-one said he can’t anonymously share some of his music here and there

Johann gets him a gig conducting for his orchestra every now and then. Kravitz is fucking ecstatic and finally gets to conduct some of his own pieces in front of an audience. Maybe they actually get to that biography johann mentioned at some point. Idk I haven’t thought about that part too much

Okay I wrote WAY more than I meant to here but I hope at least some of it was interesting and feel free to ask me questions if there are elements I’ve missed off of here that you want to hear more about! (Bearing in mind some of the answers may be “actual post canon content coming soon/later” lol.) As you can tell I have a lot of things to say about this fic & I’m always more than happy to hear that people are interested!! o:

[sunflowerchester]

Endgame and how it made Sunflowerchester write meta no one asked for but she did anyway, once again…

Last year, around the time Infinity War came out, I wrote about all my frustrations with the film. So it should be no surprise to anyone that, despite how much I enjoyed Endgame, I’m here again with Some Shit to Say: Feminist Edition.

Here’s a cut for  S P O I L E R S:

As much as I enjoyed Endgame, I have some major issues with it. Yes, it gave us a 3-second empowerment moment near the end but that felt more like placation than anything else with how bad they’ve been to their female characters throughtout the series, even and especially in this movie. Sorry, Marvel, I’m not a dog you can jingle keys at to distract me away from how you fridged not one woman (Gamora) but TWO WOMEN (and Nat) to acquire that goddamn Soul Stone. 

Not only is this trope disgustingly sexist.  It’s LAZY. 

You JUST DID IT IN THE LAST MOVIE, IT’S SO UNORIGINAL ARE YOU KIDDING ME YOU DID IT BACK TO BACK HOW?!?!!!? 

So ...yeah.... I’m exhausted of this. 

They killed 2 women for the exact same reason, for the exact same drama, for the exact same plot, and neither got a beautiful, exalted ending like Tony Stark (WHO Y’ALL KNOW I ADORE). No, they were unceremoniously killed and discarded to rally and stir the motivation of the men left alive.

When the teams left to travel back in time, there were only 2 women with them to begin wtih. When everyone returned, only the men remained.

I’m sorry, but I just don’t see how this was ever okay with them except they probably didn’t even notice bc they’re dudes.  Like... thanks for the “girl power” tableaux with all the ladies joining Carol, but that doesnt make up for the sexist bullshit rampant throughout the series...  and displayed prevalently in this very film only 30 minutes before!!!! I DIDN’T FORGET.

...where women are not only still fridged but also apparently interchangeable.

Nebula's past self being killed isn’t okay just because there is still a present day Nebula. Past Gamora crossing into this timeline doesn’t make it okay that Infinity War Gamora was fridged. Female characters are NOT interchangeable, they are NOT. It doesn’t absolve the writers of how irresponsibly they’ve dealt with female characters.

On the comment section of an article that discusses how Nat deserved better, someone said, “Uh... it was her choice.”

Do people not understand that just because a female character in a story "chose" to die to sacrifice herself for a man’s story, that doesn't mean it’s feminist??? A MAN wrote the story??? Like... this is not about Her Choice when A MAN WROTE HER CHOOSING THAT. A man chose to kill a female character to further the plot, and specifically in this instance, she died to give a MAN the rest of his life at the expense of her own. And he wrote the words for that female character to say to absolve him of that instrinsic sexism. 

Nat didn't choose it, she's not real. What is real is the consistent use of sexist tropes where women are used as props and plot devices, where a woman’s whole purpose for existence should revolve around setting up a man's story. 

Even if a woman has been a major part of a series for 10 goddamn years! 😡 What is real is misogyny and sexism in media, full stop. 

Natalie DID deserve better. She deserved her own ending to her own story, one that had nothing to do with propping up a man’s happiness or igniting the motivation of a group of men. The manpain about Natalie’s death after the fact was so frustrating to me. It was quintessential fridge-ing, and I was so tired that we were still seeing it in the FINALE of a decade long series. They’ve really learned nothing.

My friend @rockuzaki​ articulated what I think it comes down to in a convo we had after we saw the movie together:

“I think the most development I have seen for Natasha was at the beginning of Endgame, and I LOVED IT. It made me realize that I've never been invested in Natasha [before] because they never gave her a chance to be fleshed out like that... The most frustrating thing is they create these beautiful, [full] arcs for the male characters (Tony, Captain, Thor, Barton), but the female characters get these arcs that aren't fleshed out. [So, then] it seems like there were only [giving Natalie a more fleshed-out story in Endgame to build up to] her death scene. [The writers show us] that they [are capable] of fleshing out a fully developed character and a great arc for that character. Natasha finally had it after always playing a side character to the main superheroes, [but then they fridged her]. Natasha, Gamora, and Nebula were all robbed of a full arc [in order to flesh out the arcs of male stories instead of their own]. 

Endgame made it clear that male lives are valued and male pain exalted while women just serve those things. It’s why Tony got a full arc, 10 years building up the most beautiful send off for 1 male death which was a monumental event in the series...

...while Natalie --who arguably sacrificed just as much to end Thanos as Tony, because she also died to bring Thanos down-- didn’t even get a memorial scene, not even a memorial COMMENT referencing one off screen or something. Nothing.

Rocky and I struggled with the questionable rules of of time travel in Endgame but what we realized was most of the inconsitencies come from how they applied the rules differently to affect each storyline. If there aren’t consistency in the rules you can bend them for plot purposes, and that’s fine, but the writers only cared to bend them to set up/flesh out/protect male characters. The directors explain generally the rules but they only follow them when it's convenient and in doing so reveal their true priorities.

All you have to look at to see how the MCU values their female characters is how they enforce their own rules: Bend them when it gives men more screen time, keep hard and fast to them when they need to kill and/or use a woman as a plot device.

The ratio of female characters killed and tossed aside compared to the men is flagrant. There were so few to begin with in Endgame, but by the end almost all of them had either been killed or had had a version of themselves killed. The hollowness of the “girl power” moment at the end of Endgame is a pretty great metaphor for how serious Marvel has taken dealing with female characters: It’s brief, shallow, and feels like it’s just there to check a box.

[kojoty]

oh ya i made a short thread on twitter but ill put this under a cut but here’s some of my loose thoughts about endgame. if you don’t wanna read it: over all, I felt there were some really good character beats and good endings to character arcs, and they did a good job of utilizing callbacks in a way that grounded the movie and made you think of the GOOD parts of the mcu (which was smart of them bc the mcu is bloated and unforgivable half the time, so calling to the best parts of it helped to make you remember why you LIKE these characters. manipulative? yes. but that’s how movies work). On the other hand, they butchered a lot of character moments, were sociopathic towards any character that had any issues with masculinity, and sidelined every female character so thoroughly I’m astonished that no one is talking about it. 

rest of my thoughts below the cut.

endgame did this really fun game with me personally where it would take really good and fun character beats and ruin them as sociopathically as possible

LEBOWSKI THOR: Has ptsd, acknowledges that he's having a panic attack, is textually Not A King anymore and passes the helm off to Valkyrie so he can become an Asgardian of the Galaxy, is cute and has long ass hair. oh but also literally every single joke is sheer fatphobia

TONY: has a proper send off, genuinely had an engaging storyline with his daughter, a truly harrowing dilemma when he finds out about time travel... But also HE kills thanos which is undeserved, and that speech about ULTRON? DEFENDING ULTRON? HELLO? It was so ooc and ANGERING.

PEPPER has a daughter n the scene where they discuss POSSIBLY LOSING HER and framed as pepper consoling tony and helping tony come to the conclusion and she BARELY thinks about her daughter once it's SO sociologically framed as TONY'S STORY ONLY NO PEPPER'S ALLOWED. THE MISOGYNY. THiS PART IS LITERALLY MIND BOGGLING Pepper is LITERALLY NOT ALLOWED OR WRITTEN TO HAVE ANY AUTONOMY THAT ISN’T ABOUT TONY’S CHARACTER ARC. Considering pepper has been a Very Strong Female Character in the mcu (and there’s criticisms to be made about that construction imo already), making her a Mom really relegates her to a VERY specific kind of misogyny . She, and Morgan the daughter, are tony’s PRIZES, his fantasies of domesticity, and pepper loses ALL of her characterization as a strong willed woman who talks back to and doesn’t take shit from tony because of Baby. It’s literally despicable.

GAMORA is from 2014 now and that's fine but it literally ERASES both movie's Gamora characterization and she's missing now. like HELLO? actually sidenote this film HATES WOMEN. IT HATES WOMEN. CAROL does NOTHING, VALK is barely there, OKOYE and SHURI barely do anything...

Like woo hoo fun feminist scene at the end :D but does it do anything? does it mean anything? A 5 second action sequence doesn’t negate theme after theme after theme of ‘women don’t matter past their use for men’ that is present throughout this ENTIRE film. It’s... It’s so WEIRD.

Nebula is the only woman who is allowed to DO anything in this film and even then, her struggle and past with thanos is completely sidelined to give captain america maaaaaan paaaaainnnnn and it's just UGH cry me a river steve. go play bingo you old bitch.

More gripes: Steve's arc was awful and I genuinely think it's disturbing that they turned Peggy into a "prize" for steve to have (despite her having kids and a husband, now that's erased from our canon). Plotholes of ‘he knew about x y and z and did NOTHING about it’ aside, the fact that he erased her husband and kids because he HAD to have that pussy is just............ it’s gross! it’s gross and TBQH it makes Sharon an even worse character in hindsight and it also makes so many scenes with bucky so hollow and flat. 

like im sorry but you can’t have a scene where steve whispers “bucky... is.... alive...” as the EMOTIONAL crux that will get his younger self to stop fighting him and then have his final scene where he LITERALLY DOESN’T EVEN SPEAK TO BUCKY AT ALL AND BUCKY JUST... IS COOL WITH THAT? It comes across as bucky realizing steve was toxic and not for him and walking away and it’s just. It’s SO WEIRD. The construction of their relationship is weird and I honest to god do think the russos hate bucky so much bc bucky is SUCH a homoerotic character by design and giving him any screen time means having to acknowledge that and the russos are terrified of gay people.

the good of that scene: yay sam is captain america ! that's dope! fun callback to the comics with old man steve! the bad: um does anyone else get the vibe that the russos literally hate bucky. and don't think steve cares about bucky at all. hello.

those are my gripes. the good: i thought it was paced well, i thought it was a fun trip and ride, there WAS really cool seeds of characterization and I'm VERY excited to see some of the solo movies and what comes out of them, scott lang was a delight and im glad he got screentime

loki. loki. loki. sambucky is really being set up for the show which is fun.i thought the framing of old thanos vs young thanos was REALLY cool and there were some REALLY cool fightscenes (the one with spiderman getting thrown around the battlefield was dope)

the first HOUR of this movie is literally just 'let's go deep into the logistics of how shattered and scarred a world that got snapped would be' n we get really deep introspection that honestly made me like black widow more than i was expecting (the film was CRAZY to her too tho)

This was... honestly a very strong film for Tony as a character and I think they did a good job minus the ultron rant of making him enjoyable. him and nebula's friendship was FANTASTIC and i wish it had been expanded on bc it was FUN as shit

um. there's a lot i liked actually but. it was over all a fun experience superrisingly and it doesn't FEEL like three hours went by, bc i was engrossed enough in the film that i wasn't thinking about what time it was. id give it like a 60-70 percent over all.

[forever-more-never-again]

Fire and Water

Requested: Anonymous

Oh god. This is super angsty. I am so sorry! You already say you cry when you read my writing....this will have you bawling. Even I teared up a little and I was the one who wrote it!

Pairing: None

Word Count: 3K

Warnings: Pain, Blood, Cursing, Abuse, mentions/alludes of Rape, torture, swearing, ANGST! Mental escapism, mental instability

Request: Hey I LOVE your blog and your writing style so so much I always end up in tears when I read your writing! Would you maybe be down to write an avengers x reader where reader fought with cap in civil war and ends up on the raft and is tortured and abused as “an example” for the others and after they get rescued the team sees the extent of the damage and have to help heal them mentally/physically with angst I just have a lot of feelings about civil war still and I don’t think cap and tony fully understood how much their own actions affected their teammates bc they were both thinking of themselves and I kinda wanna see how they’d react to being faced with the consequences and the rest of the team too.

Masterlist

What you wouldn’t give to turn back time. As the hollow screams continued to fall from your chapped lips.

It had all started from a stupid fight. Tony Stark, the righteous man, who thought that regulating the Avengers would be better, and Steve Rogers, the Captain, who didn’t know how to express himself without coming across as overbearing.

Of course, neither wanted to listen to you. The newest Avenger. You had joined after Wanda and Vision and the whole Sovokian deal. You were enhanced, in that you were pyrokinetic.

When Ross came forward with the accords, you immediately felt something was off. When he said that it was now required that all enhanced and inhuman individuals are to register themselves to the government, it felt a little too holocaustic for you.

So, after considering your options, you were deciding to just go into hiding. But then, Clint found you. Packing up a suitcase in a rundown apartment.

“Hey [Y/n], where ya going?”

You laughed sardonically at the man’s easy going tone, “I’m going away. I can’t watch my family tear themselves apart because they can’t see that they are being played like fools.”

Clint nodded along with what you said, sitting on the edge of your bed. You didn’t miss that he was dressed in his archer gear.

“You know, Cap sent me to retrieve Wanda. She’s being held against her will by Tony and Vision. I thought you would be there to, but you got out.”

You sighed, twitching your fingers to make flames dance between them, “I doubt they could have kept me contained…” You smirked. Letting the flames extinguish, you pulled your duffel onto your shoulder.

Clint stepped in front of you, a frown, concern in his eyes, “[Y/n]...We could use Blaze on our team.”

He referred to your codename and you reflected on all the good times you had with the team. Shaking your head softly, you were about to reply when Clint interrupted you again. “I feel the same way about this whole thing as you do. But you and I both know that Tony and Steve are too pigheaded to back down. If one side wins, we can get them to listen. To talk. But this is going to happen. Sooner or later.”

You groaned, running your hand through your hair as you realized Clint was right.

“Alright Hawkeye, I guess I’m team Cap. So...do we get color coordinated shirts or something?” You teased, bumping up against the older man.

Clint laughed, shaking his head at you, “Possibly, but first, we have a witch to rescue.”

The day of the battle, the fight, the squabble, you were suited up in your uniform, it allowed you to combust without worrying about clothes being burnt away and left in the nude.

Standing across from friends, family. Natasha’s eyes dimmed when she saw you walk onto the tarmac.

Tony yelled out across the space, “You dragged [Y/n] into this? They are barely apart of the Avengers.”

You bristled at that, this was your family as much as Tony’s. Your hair started to smoke as your anger warmed up.

Cap laid a warning hand on your shoulder and you relaxed slightly.

He yelled back, “We can still talk this out Tony. The accords are not the way to go!”

Tony sighed, “Alright, I’m bored. Underoos!”

After that, it became a blur.

You became a human torch. Your entire body alight with flames as you helped your side. Even with the new additions, namely a kid in a spider suit and a man wearing a furry persona of a cat, you stayed focused.

But you didn’t want to seriously harm anyone, and you knew you were holding your punches and your fireballs as they shot from your hands, missing their marks by calculated seconds.

When you saw Steve and Bucky running to the airplane hangar, and flying across the sky, only then did you let your flames go completely out.

Not even minutes later, helicopters filled the area, along with sirens and vans. “Put your hands on your head! Do it now!”

You kneeled on the ground, following the commands, sweat dripping into your eyes as you saw the rest of your group, Clint, Wanda, Scott, and Sam, doing the same thing. Knowing that your part was done for now.

Sam turned to you right as a soldier wearing a gas mask kicked you brutally in the back of your head, making you fall to the ground. Dizzy.

“Hey! They’re just a kid! There’s no need for violence, they’re cooperating!”

“Shut up!” Another indistinguishable soldier yelled as they dragged the handcuffed man into a van.

You were pulled up off the ground by your hair. Yelling out in pain, you reached up to stop the hands, but then felt cool metal click on your wrists.

“Now, no funny business with that power of yours, or we shoot you straight in the head, okay?” A chilling voice spoke in your ear. You shivered at the undercurrent of sick pleasure in the tone, as if he was hoping you would step out of line so that he could kill you.

You were herded like cattle onto a blacked out van. Taken out to a different airport, where you were loaded onto a plan. Any questions were met with a punch, or a kick.

Poor Wanda was curled in on herself, relieving memories of her time with Ultron and being kept in a cell.

“Hey kid, it’ll be okay. Cap won’t forget us.” Clint had said at one point.

The jet slowed down, and you wondered where you were. When you were pulled up off your seat and shoved to the open door, you saw and you freaked out.

“No! No! No! Please NO!” You started screaming, kicking, tears streaming down your face as five men had to man handle you off the plan and onto the floating building in the middle of a tumultuous sea.

You hated the Ocean. Always had. It was one of your biggest fears. It was common enough to joke that it was due to your pyrokinetic abilities, but being put on a metal death trap out in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the Ocean was a whole other story.

The dragged you inside, where you were stripped of your suit. Tears continued to flow, silently down your face, as several men got a little handsy during the strip search.

Humiliated, disgusted, defiled, you finally were led to a circular room where the rest of your team was. The first person you saw was Wanda, her skin pale, eyes red, as she sat in a straightjacket and a collar on her neck.

A similar collar on your neck. Only you and Wanda wore them. You were the only enhanced prisoners.

The collars kept an undercurrent of electricity flowing through your body, muting your abilities.

You were left without a straight jacket on. For some reason. You didn’t ask.

It had been several hours in the floating prison, The Raft as you overheard some guards call it.

Clint and Sam had tried to keep everyone’s spirits up, But Wanda was unresponsive, and Scott was grim.

You stayed sitting on the concrete floor, trying to stay calm everytime a wave rocked the deathtrap you were in.

Your fear was slowly settling into panic, and you itched to ignite, but everytime you so much as reached for your powers inside, you got jolted and dropped to the ground like a corpse, eyes blurred, fingers stiff, mouth open trying to get your breath back.

“Well Hello. You the one who gets hot? The one who is smokin?” The harsh laughter fell on deaf ears. Your back to the cell, facing the blank wall.

“Leave them alone!” You heard a scuffle as Sam tried to break free from his cell. Coming to defend you. It was pointless, the cells were built to keep in enhanced individuals, what could a mere man do to break out of them?

You flinched when you heard the rumble of the cell door opening. Starting to understand what was about to happen.

Clint, Sam and Scott all started shouting over each other.

“No!”

“Leave them alone!”

“They’ve done nothing!”

“Stop it!”

And then you were pulled by your hair once again. On your back now, you looked up into several pairs of eyes. Hidden faces by their masks. Their eyes though, the malice you saw there terrified you.

“Please..” Your voice was tiny. Your strength gone.

One of the men knelt over you, “Did you hear that? They said please, I think they want this..”

With an ugly laugh, the men began their fun.

It went on for hours, without a break. Your screams and yells faded away as your throat became torn up and sore.

Your face was swollen and bloody, eyes no longer able to produce tears.

Your clothes were ripped from your body, and you were abused in ways you never thought possible.

By the time the men grew bored with you, you were no longer there. At least, not mentally.

Sitting on the cold ground, you stared, unblinking, at nothing. Your arms showed goosebumps and your frame rocked with harsh shivers, but you made no move to cover up or wrap your arms around yourself.

“Oh kid….[Y/n].... I should have never brought you into this.” Clint mourned, knees on the concrete, hands wrapped around the bars of the cell as he stared at your figure across the room.

Wanda tried to talk to you from her cell next door. Her soft accent normally making you smile. But you moved not a muscle.

Blood steadily hit the ground, dripping from various places, the sound growing deafeningly loud as time went by.

“Cap will get us out of here...He has to.” Sam said, trying to inject hope in his voice. But it wasn’t very convincing as his voice cracked.

You didn’t even move when Tony came to the Raft.

“You bastard. You sick bastard. Look at what you did!” Clint screamed, pointing Tony towards yours and Wanda’s cell.

Tony’s eyes widened in horror seeing Wanda in a straight jacket and collar. But when he saw you...his heart broke.

“[Y/n]... I didn’t know...I wouldn’t have….I’m so sorry.”

But you just stared straight through him. Sitting in a puddle of red, sticky blood. Your mouth slightly open, breathing in shallow pants. Your eyes glazed.

Tony wiped away a tear. He stood up and walked back over to Clint, “I’m talking to Ross, trying to reason with him. This is all too much.” He encompassed everything.

Clint snorted, “You think? They spent hours in that cell with [Y/n]... doing things I wish I could unsee, that I could unhear. She is broken, Tony. And it’s all thanks to your petty little fight.”

Tony sighed, not bothering trying to justify his actions. He knew that it could have gone better, that he had been putting pride before family.

“I’ll see what I can do.” He mutters, walking with his head down out of the prison. He would fight for his family, like he should have done to start with.

Right as you were shaking yourself out of your self induced daze, your tormentors returned. You simply sighed, and sunk back away inside your mind so that you were not there to feel, see, or hear what they were doing to your physical body.

“[Y/n].”

“Blaze.”

“[Y/n].”

In the murky depths of your subconscious, you heard your name being called. But you pulled away everytime you neared the clear surface. There was pain out there. Pain and torture and humiliation. No family left. No fight.

You wanted to stay in the darkness. You felt nothing in it. It was calm. No senses. No fear.

“[Y/n]!”

“Everyone stand back, I’m going to try this.”

You came awake abrupt, jolting up. With a scream. But nothing came from your bruised throat except a gasp.

“[Y/n], hey, you’re alright.”

Your eyes were unfocused. You just knew you had to get away. You ignited, forgetting the collar. But when you actually did explode into flames, you held your hand up to your face in wonder.

And then the flames were gone and you were covered in white spray. Looking up, blinking, you saw a chagrined Tony holding a fire extinguisher standing next to Dr. Cho who was holding a syringe.

“Hey there kiddo. Sorry about the adrenaline shot. But you’ve been in a coma for a week, we needed to get you awake.” You looked around. You were in a hospital bed. You recognized the tower’s med bay.

“Tony?” Your voice was hoarse, and you ended up coughing, your hands reaching around your neck, trying to sooth the pain.

Dr. Cho was at your side in an instant, handling you a glass of water and gently removing your hands from your neck.

“I’ll leave you alone for a moment. But Tony… Be careful.”

Your mind didn’t register the tone that Dr. Cho used. You brushed it off as you greedily gulped down the cool water.

It was when you wiped your chin that you realized it wasn’t just Tony left in the hospital with you.

“Steve?” Tears formed in your eyes. As they fell down your cheeks. You felt a burning sting. “Ow.�� You murmured, reaching up and touching your face. You started to freak out a little when you felt swollen cheeks and cuts.

Steve looked somber as he scooted his stool closer to the side of your bed, “Hey Champ. How are you feeling?”

You scrunch your eyes as you peered at the two men in confusion. “Am I dreaming? Have I finally died? Is this heaven? Always thought it would be less painful.” You contemplated. Poking yourself. Eliciting pain from your ribs, legs, face. Your whole body was one big burrito of pain.

You began laughing, the hysteria there. Tony placed a hand on your arm, Steve copying the action on your other arm. Your laughter stopped just as abruptly as it began as tears once again flooded your eyes.

“Where were you!?” You screamed, bringing your hands up in balled fists and banging them against Steve’s chest. “Where were you!? You left us!”

You sagged, your strength not where it should be. Sobbing, sniffling weakly, you sat up to look into Steve’s blue eyes. He had tears carving down his face as well.

You turned your back on him, towards Tony, “And you...You let them...You left...I….”

You tripped over your words, not wanting the images that pushed at the sides of your vision to come into view.

Tony’s eyes were wet, but he was not yet crying as he bowed his head, “I know. I failed you. I’m so sorry [Y/n].”

You wiped your face, leaning back on the bed, staring up at the white ceiling, counting the tiles. “How?” A silent question. But both men heard.

Steve spoke up first, “Tony found me and Bucky out in Zemo’s hiding spot in the Alps.”

Tony filled in, “I had confronted Ross about the raft and I found out that Ross fabricated several of the accident and death reports from our missions. I was going to help Steve clear Bucky’s name.”

Steve’s voice held confidence as he continued, “When Tony told us that, we stopped and we talked it over. After, of course, defeating Zemo and talking to T’challa.”

You closed your eyes, you didn’t recognize the name, but frankly you didn’t care. You didn’t have the energy or strength to care anymore.

Tony’s voice got stronger, “We came to an agreement. Bucky is safe. We are working with the United Nations to fix several glaring issues with the Accords, and we got all of you out of the raft, and cleared your names.”

Sitting back up, you raised a hand and watched tiny flames dance on the ends of your fingertips. “You didn’t get me out of the Raft.”

Steve and Tony shared a look, but you focused on the orange and yellow glow.

“[Y/n]... You’re off the Raft. You’re in the tower. You sustained severe injuries and have been in a coma for a week. But you’re off the Raft.” Steve said softly.

You clenched your hand into a fist, your nails biting into your soft flesh as the flames died. You glared at the two way mirror in front of you, ignoring either men on your sides, “No. I’m still on that Raft. I will never be able to escape the sounds. The feel of their hands on me.” Tony and Steve winced, “The cold. The terror. Their laughs, their voices, they are with me, always and forever now.”

Steve leaned forward, “We can get you help [Y/n]. Like we are doing for Bucky, you can see someone and talk..”

“I Don’t want to Talk!” You screamed, ignoring the fire in your throat as you once again ignited into flames, the bed starting to smolder as you sat on it. Threatening to catch fire from your body.

You screeched, your hands clenched, your flames shot out, causing the men to dive to the ground. Your fire broke the glass, the door burst open, and the fire alarm started blaring as the sprinklers came on, killing your flames.

“Leave me.” You whispered, letting the water soak your hair. Plastering it against your cheeks.

Tony got up first, and cautiously reached out to you, “I don’t think you are in any state to leave alone..”

“Leave me, before I do something I’ll regret. Like kill you.” You sneered. Growling at them as their eyes widened.

They backed out of the room, keeping their eyes on you, even as you put your head back, eyes closed, letting the water fall onto your broken soul. Letting it soak into your skin. Praying for it to wash away the memories.

FOREVER Taglist:

@sxph-t @littlestfangirl @rainydaysrnevergrey @not-jk-rowling @sociallyawkwardcircus-freak-hi @ayyidkeither

Avengers Taglist:

@jadepc

[cipherr]

what kind of dark place is Eralei in and how does our resident cinnamon roll Sith rediscover happiness? if you're comfortable w/ spoiling that much before the Great Eralei Fic, i mean. (i know there's been at least one other anon, probably more b/c your OCs are beyond gorgeous 😍 i totally get you tho, im super shy when it comes to sharing stuff about my characters too)

you are making my life complete, anon. ily

OOH BOY. i think the best way to answer that first part is to go more in depth  on her life and her character. i don’t want to spoil too much, especially about the whole Wrath thing, though if anyone is super curious about that and wants to know please feel free to message me and i will spoil it for you :’D 

this is gonna get long, but it’s important stuff, since i haven’t openly posted this much in-depth about Eralei before c: i uhhhh apologize in advance LOL

and to anyone who cares to read all of it (but please don’t feel obligated bc it is…a lot…) you are a saint, and i love you. amen.

so Eralei comes from a noble Imperial family, long-standing and proud and very steeped in their traditions. she was always particularly gentle, though; inherently kindhearted and soft, she had plans to eventually use her standing to work towards stability and peace rather than squabbling for more power. that all got turned on its head when her Force sensitivity was discovered, a bit later than most maybe, when she was about sixteen. suddenly she wasn’t to become the future Lady of her house anymore… she was to become Sith, to become powerful and strong and be a great source of pride for her family just like all the others in her bloodline before her who happened to have such a ‘gift.’ to that end, she was given her family’s traditional markings on her face, a permanent reminder of who and what she is and always will be. go and become Sith and bring pride to her family…or don’t come back at all.she was given a private trainer for a year or so, teaching her the basics of combat techniques to give her a fighting chance, and then she was whisked away to Korriban, and she follows the Warrior storyline from there.

in her early days, both in the academy and as an apprentice, she was fueled by fear. she was terrified of the other Sith, but of course she couldn’t let it show. she masked it, used its strength to survive. she desperately played the part of the dutiful apprentice, the proper young Sith, because that was all she knew to do. she avoided being needlessly cruel whenever possible, and on the occasions where she’d be expected to enforce her power and authority on ‘lesser’ beings, usually because she was being watched, she did so with great remorse. she didn’t trust anyone around her, least of all Darth Baras. she knew from the start that he was only going to use her and then dispose of her, she just had to do her best to survive and bide her time until then.

but what hurt her the most was how she’d be treated by non-Sith. some would cower and grovel like they were expected to do, yes, and that just broke her heart. but worse than that were the ones who treated her like just another monster, who assumed she’d be like all the rest, who wouldn’t even give her the chance to prove herself. she even ran into Jedi who would immediately taunt or provoke her, assuming she would be hostile, sometimes even trying to goad her into swinging first so that they’d have an excuse to fight.she was quickly realizing that no matter where she went or what she did, she would be met with fear or hatred. 

the absolute last thing she wanted was to be just another Sith monster, but as time went on and she got herself deeper and deeper, into her apprenticeship and into Sith politics and lifestyle, it became harder and harder for her to hold onto her ideals. she couldn’t always talk her way out of violence, or spare someone without getting caught. her survival instinct took over, and in order to not appear weak to the other Sith, she had to act like one more often. and…it became easier. she found herself raising a hand to choke the life out of someone, out of frustration or impatience, without giving it a second thought. she was in a hurry, damn it, and they were making things difficult. if they wouldn’t give her their cooperation, she would just force it out of them, and then leave them on the floor gasping for breath. but at least they were alive, right?

but this terrified her. it came so easily. she was so wrapped up in doing whatever she felt was necessary for her survival, so wrapped up in playing her role, that it started to become second nature. worst of all, for the first time since leaving her home, she started to feel strong. she started to feel that she might have a chance of survival after all. but at what cost?

she has her moments of ‘weakness,’ where she snaps and, fueled by her fear or her anger or whatever else, becomes at least briefly consumed. those moments soon pass and she’s left wondering what’s she’s truly becoming..and eventually wonders if it’s even worth fighting against.

i mean, if she’s going to play pretend and act like a Sith, why not just make it real? why try to deny it all? she’s becoming strong, she’s becoming respected…feared, too, but that’s just the way things are. maybe this really is who and what she was meant to be all along, and trying to fight back against it is just prolonging her misery. why not just give in?

except…that’s not her. it’s not who she is. deep inside, she knows this, and it never really goes away. she finds no more satisfaction in just giving in to it all…in fact, she just feels hollow. and she’s aware enough to realize she can’t sustain that, either.

eventually, she comes into her own and finds more of a balance. she’s not so soft anymore, but she retains her good heart. she finds meaning in being Sith in her own way. you don’t need to be cruel and power-hungry to be Sith, you don’t need to trample everyone else underfoot for personal gain. she allows her feelings and emotions and passions to fuel and strengthen her, rather than hold herself back out of fear. for a time, she’s actually doing pretty well.

then, of course, the entire galaxy gets thrown into absolute chaos :’))

all of this stuff from her past starts to resurface again, later on during the expansions. (spoilers ahead for everything up to where we are now, obviously, but i feel like most people know what’s going on by now)this time she’s making difficult decisions that affect way more than just herself… she has a lot of people watching her and depending on her now. her personal vendetta against Vitiate/Valkorion (for Personal Spoiler Reasons) begins to cloud her mind and consume her as well. she can barely stand to live with herself, knowing he’s rattling around in her head. and her sheer rage against him and his actions, and what she sees his son becoming, almost completely overtakes her. the Eralei of twelve years ago might have seen that there could be a way to give Arcann a chance, but so much has changed since then, and she’s stressed out and struggling and exhausted. in her eyes, Arcann is just on his way to becoming another Valkorion, and she does everything in her power to prevent that from happening…losing a lot in the process. Senya’s death, by her own hand, hits her very very hard. Senya was more of a mother figure to her than her own mother, but she didn’t stand down, and Eralei felt–in that moment–that she had no choice. it’s one of the biggest events that leads to her breaking, and one of her deepest regrets.

and then the whole traitor thing puts her even more on edge, she’s dealing with more Personal Spoilery Things relating to her past that are coming back to haunt her and actually threatening her life, and Theron comes in with that ‘betrayal’ and the whole “you’re becoming what we’ve fought against” thing (which WE know is bullshit, and HAVE known is bullshit, but…she doesn’t know that. all she hears is one of her closest allies affirming her worst–and oldest–fears. that she’s just another monster, and she’s been blind to it this whole time, until it’s too late.)

as for how she pulls back out of it all and becomes herself again… you will just have to wait and see 8) (honestly, i’m still working a lot of the details out myself.)

but yes! that’s Eralei. she’s complicated and confusing and a bit contradictory sometimes, but i’ve never had this much fun with a character or a story before, so i’m just having the time of my life :’D

i hope i’m not sounding redundant but thank you again, having someone else take an interest in my characters and their stories means more to me than i could possibly put into words.

[psi-psina]

um lmao i know i’m super late to the party here but i just...finally... read harry potter and the cursed child and i think i need to start drinking or something I D ONT KNOW i just need to do SOMETHING to try to erase this ‘book’ from my memory??? HOW CAN I UNREAD SOMETHING???

like....i don’t know if i’ve ever been so furious reading a book before...how in the hell could j.k. rowling approve and contribute to and put her name to this absolutely AWFUL piece of FANFICTION? the one good thing about it being it is so completely and utterly noncompliant with literally. every. single. thing. we. know. about harry potter that thankfully i don’t even have to go through any real process for trying to come to terms with it as new canon. because it just, like, isn’t.

like...to start with this play was honest to goodness written by someone who hates Harry. does J.K. hate Harry now or something? has Harry Potter been tainted for her by all the idiots who can’t read??? WHY DOES THE PLAY TALK ABOUT CEDRIC’S DEATH AND EVERYTHING THAT VOLDEMORT DID TO HARRY LIKE IT WAS HARRY’S FAULT? if i’d been reading a physical copy of the book i would have THROWN it when they were talking about cedric being one of “Harry’s mistakes”...like...excuse me. LIKE lkJSNDF it’s the exact attitude misguided cretins people who hate him have! like “oh if he had just had the SENSE to take the cup for himself instead of being such a hero(??) and offering to share the victory with cedric then voldemort wouldn’t have killed cedric!” amos diggory being all outta the blue after 20 years like “I BLAME YOU FOR CEDRIC’S DEATH, GO AND MAKE IT RIGHT!” like i’m sorry but as if. what rubbish!!

 and harry’s relationship with albus??? what complete and UTTER bullshit, SLANDER and OUTRIGHT character assassination!! when Harry tells albus he wishes albus wasn’t his son, when they have their fight? Slander. LISTEN...Harry Potter simply would not say that to one of his children, EVER, that is absolutely fucking ridiculous.

...it literally felt like this play was singlehandedly setting out to destroy the characters and world we grew up with and loved so much.... 

Ron was flanderised and his character was clearly written based off his movie counterpart rather than book!Ron. what the hell was with Hermione being the minister for magic? terrible...just terrible. lmao she is literally asked in the deathly hallows if she’d thought of pursuing a career in the ministry and she’s like “No, i’m actually hoping to do some good in the world.” a,djnfaksjd more rubbish. Harry being an Auror is the absolute worst, it’s one of a number of things that pisses me off in the books because it just makes absolutely no fucking sense for Harry to do ANYTHING but settle down as the DADA professor at Hogwarts 😩 I can’t even talk about the bit where Snape showed up like as if it wasn’t already obvious enough that jack whatshisface was clearly a huge Malfoy’s stan, that bit of Snape-worship-fanfic had me rolling my eyes into the back of my skull. this play clearly sucks to the point that it does bc it was written by a Snape apologist. 

when they return to godric’s hollow on the night voldemort kills james and lily and harry is there...he’s there...and he see’s....what the fuck...what the fuc k wha the fu

unforgivable

the kids were ok, the only one i liked was scorpius, the rest were really meh and just the whole thing was a complete disaster ... i can’t even talk about the actual story because it’s just too much of a fucking disaster lmao

[hotelsweet]

Hey, I had a random idea that could work as a prompt: AU meet-cute (because I'm a sucker for these) - Jake and Amy are seated next to each other on a flight and Amy is super uncomfortable/ close to freaking out (maybe because of her claustrophobia?) and Jake helps her calm down and they spend the rest of the flight talking? I dunno; random idea is random ^^;

I’MHYPERVENTILATIGN This prompt didn’t just… kill me it leapt off my screen andpunched me in the face!! In the best way possible ofcalso I’m lowkey in the mood for thisbc I’m travelling so much over thenext couple weeks!! I loooovvvveeeee it ok I won’t wastetime let’s just jump into it:

 It’s ataround 7:18pm, sat in the airport lounge waiting for her flight, that AmySantiago figures out that she is most likely receiving a death glare from thewoman sat opposite because she hasn’tstopped tapping her fingernails against her passport for the last ten minutes.

As soon as this realisation hits her she snaps out of it,immediately feeling the odd hollowness created by the absence of her nervoustick.

It’s nother fault. Flying is and always has been one of her worst fears- thoughnowadays, she’s mostly been able to subduethe anxiety for the sake of adult life, childhood nightmares of falling fromthe sky long behind her, sometimes it simply gets the better of her.

This, by all accounts, would be one of those times.

Her fingers itch to keep tapping. A light sheen of sweatglistens uncomfortably over her forehead. Her stomach churns, nausea pulsatingunder every centimetre of her skin at the thought what’s essentially a large tin can propelling itself throughthe air until she’s back home in New York.

Focused on the huge plane outside the window, she can’t help the feeling of completehelplessness that fills her.

“Will passengers for the American Airlines flight 481 to JFK pleasebegin boarding…”

A cool, calm female voice echoes through the atrium, andeveryone around Amy begins to move, standing up and organising their thingsbefore rushing over to the gate.

Perhaps she stands up too quickly, but a wave of dizzinessslams into her like she’s beenhit by a car.

Despite the collected, sweet voice that instructs her andeveryone around her, she can’t helpthe bitter irritation that brews within her at the thought of this flight. Whenit’s bad, it’s really bad;claustrophobia, social anxiety, the works. A complete tapestry of anxiety.

With a sigh, she picks up her bag and heads towards theboarding gate, waiting patiently in line with everyone else.

Inwardly, as she pats away the sweat on her forehead, sheprays she’s not sitting next to a totalasshole.

    ***

    As luck would have it, she is, in fact, sat next to a totalasshole.

“Hey, Angie?! Could I get,like, a whole bunch more of these nuts? I’m supersnacky.”

Sat up on his seat like a little kid, the man sat next toher, in the window seat, beams toothily at the flight attendant- who, to Amy’s disgust, giggles softly at him witha nod, before heading towards the back of the cabin. He’s tall, dressed in a leather jacket with a hoodieunderneath- like he can’tdecide whether he wants to be an adult or a teenager, she thinks. Annoyancestirs within her at the entire image of him, and only partially because she hasa select and precise loathing for men who speak to female employees as if they’re friends.

Since he’sarrived, squeezing past her into his seat, he’sfiddled loudly with his little TV screen, chatted to the cabin crew like they’re his college buds, and hummed theentirety of what she’sfairly certain was a Coldplay song. She’s neverseen someone so unapologetically cheerful and friendly.

He must catch the side-eye she’sgiving him, because after he’s sathimself back down, his attention keeps coming back to her, looking at heroddly, a combination of interest and confusion in his expression.

She tries to ignore it, the way he’s unabashedly observing her in public, watching her gothrough each of her electronic devices and turn them off. His gaze burns intoher, completely unashamed, until she actually finds herself becomingfrustrated. He must be used to this, being able to look at and speak to whoeverhe wants- he’s pretty good-looking, andclearly a confident guy. Somehow, this only makes her want to scold him more.

“Can I help you?” She asks him sweetly.

“Y’know, you don’t actually need to do that,” he says matter-of-factly, noddingdown at her lap, in which sits her laptop, her phone, and her iPod, all now shutoff or on airplane mode.

“What? Yes, you do,” she says, “otherwise why would they ask you to?”

“Because it’s not actually dangerous, it justmakes an annoying noise over the radar when they’retrying to fly.”

“Well, then,” she says, smiling coolly, “I guess I just have a shred of commoncourtesy.”

He doesn’t replyto this, instead raising his eyebrows indignantly and sitting back in his seat.She glances over at him, just once, to see if he’sreacted- but all that remains on his face is a slight expression of amusement.It’s just on the brink of irritating, asthough her speaking back to him is funny somehow.

Quietly, she opens her bag in her lap, and begins to dig forher Ambien and a bottle of water. Her fingers find the bottle, pulling it outof the bag- but, to her horror, the pills are nowhere in sight.

“No, c’mon…” shemutters to herself as she begins to dig through her bag more urgently.

Annoyance and another dollop of anxiety smacks her gutharshly as she realises she’s aboutto sit here, for six hours, next to this dude,without anything to calm her down. She could always soothe the nerves with somewine, but right now she’drather do anything than bring that flight attendant back to her.

A soft dingsignifies the seatbelt sign coming on for the first time- Amy’s stomach twinges with nerves, eventhough this fits the order of things, the bustle and hubbub of people settlinginto their seats having died down. The little screen in front of her lights upand begins to play a safety video, and several flight attendants file into theaisles to begin their demonstration.

“I’m Jake,” theman next to her says quietly as she watches the hostess in front of them.

She smiles politely at him then looks back towards thehostess. It’s not that he seems genuinelyawful, or anything- even if he has been mildly irritating in the half an houror so they’ve spent together- but shejust could not be in less of a mindset to make a friend; even chatting feels alittle too much of an effort to push her head into right now. Judging by theway he was talking to that attendant, there’s alsothe chance that he’s about to start flirtingwith her, which she really can’t deal with right now. So, as far asshe’s concerned, the best option issilence.

“Okay, I’m sorry for picking on you when youput all of your electronics into airplane mode. I have a reflex where I can’t help but pick on dorky littlethings like that.”

“Are you sure that was anapology?” She narrows her eyes andturns to him. He looks at her candidly, like he’sgenuinely undecided. It’s atthis exact moment that she realises he’sharmless, going from one goofy expression to the next like a teenager.

“I guess I’m a little out of practice,” he admits, a small chuckle risingfrom his throat.

“Right.”

Though she’slooking forward at the air hostess, she allows herself a small smile now, as itbecomes clearer and clearer that, immature as he could be, his main issue as aperson seems to be being overfriendly.

“I’m Amy,” sheoffers.

“Amy,” he repeats, smiling. “Nice tomeet you.” He offers his hand, whichshe shakes firmly. “Good shake,” he comments.

“I’m well-practiced,” shesays proudly. Momentarily, she spots confusion dart over his face, but sheignores it- she doesn’t owehim the wild stories of her handshake seminars, not yet.

“So what’s bringing you to New York?” He asks quietly, after a moment.

“Sorry, I just-” she cuts in over him awkwardly, “I want to listen to this,” she says, looking between him andthe safety demonstration.

“Right,” he says, and she turns back to watch. Only a couple ofseconds pass before he’stalking again. “I can only assume this isyour first ever flight, because there’sliterally no other reason to be that invested in an airline’s safety guidelines.”

She rolls her eyes.

“Don’t take this the wrong way,” shereplies, “but do you ever stop talking?”

“I guess not,” he says, throwing a peanut in theair and catching it in his mouth. “Nut?”

“I’m good.”

“Your loss.” He throws another in the air.

“Oh! You’re not wearing your seatbelt,” she realises out loud, the concernin her tone immediately making her a little self-conscious.

“Oh, right,” he mutters, clicking it into place. “Forgot.”

Forgot? Shewatches him fiddle with it, then go into his hand luggage, pulling out a bottleof Gatorade, from which he takes a hefty swig. She can’t help but feel a little sick at this- it’s 8:30 in the morning, and thethought of any beverage other than coffee is too much for her.

He’sunlike anyone she’s ever met before- adecent-looking man, likely around her age, with the habits and chatter of afive-year-old.

Distracted by him, she almost jumps when the plane’s engines begin to rumble, graspingfirmly onto the arm rests of her seat as they do.

“Woah,” Jake murmurs, and Amy’s notsure whether it’s a genuine reaction or beingsaid in a bid to reassure her somehow. Either way, she doesn’t care. “Y’okay?”

“Yeah, just took me bysurprise a little,” she admits.

“Sir,” that flight hostess’s voicereturns again, directed towards Jake, “if Icould request that you close your tray table.”

“Sure, smort,” he replies hastily, smiling up ather.

“Smort? Very smooth,” Amyjibes as soon as the hostess is out of earshot. He narrows his eyes. “Y’knowshe’s essentially paid to flirt with you, right?”

“For the record, I find itvery hurtful and presumptuous that you’reassuming I’m trying to flirt with her.”

“Please, it’s all you’ve done since you stepped onto this plane.”

“How d’you know that?”

“I don’t, obviously, I just mean… y’know, you’re-” Shestammers, irritated by the small smile this evokes from him.

The plane jumps as something kickstarts in the engine, and,startled, Amy’s grip on the arm reststightens- she looks out of the window, and notices that they’re at the start of the runway. Atonce, both fear and gratitude seeps into her system- fear, in response to thefact that she’s about to be launched 35,000feet into the air, and gratitude in response to the fact that, by some miracle,Jake has kept her distracted from it all for the last ten minutes or so.

“Cabin crew, please take yourseats for takeoff…” A low voice comes throughthe ceiling, raspy as though playing through a radio. Panic strikes into Amy’s chest.

“Talk to me,” she hears herself saying to Jake,before she’s even thought about it. “Please.”

She’sexpecting a joke, a look of confusion, or at least a smartass reply back- butinstead, his nonchalant expression changes immediately into one of concern.

“Sure, sure,” he starts, “Uh. You never said why you’regoing to New York.”

“I’m going home,” shesays quickly, as the plane starts to move. “I livein Brooklyn.”

“Nice,” he replies, “I livein Williamsburg.”

“Hipster-ville,” she says, without hesitation. To hersurprise, he laughs.

“I was about to argue back,but someone opened a cronut store opposite my apartment the other week.”

“A cronut store? As in, just cronuts?”

“Yeah. They’re not even that great. And I’d know- I once ate nothing but pastryfor three days”

There’s apause, and Amy’s eyes find the window, wherethe plane is now picking up speed along the runway. Jake must notice this too,because he tries to pick up conversation again rather hurriedly-

“Roommates?”

“What?”

“D’you have ‘em?” He smiles, in what must be at leastpartial disbelief, at the sudden, high-paced conversation they’re having.

“Yeah, three!”

“Three?!”

“Yeah,” she laughs nervously, “I’m kind of low on cash. I’m training at the Academy right now-I want to be a cop, so I’mcommuting, and training, and working, and… what?” She stops at the only slightly gorgeous grin he’s giving her right now.

“You’re at the Academy?”

“Yeah,” she says slowly.

“No way. I’m a cop! I finished my training acouple years back.”

“Are you kidding?” She asks seriously, completelyunable to picture this man-child in uniform.

He starts to answer, but the plane leaves the ground, andshe can’t help the small gasp thatescapes her.

“It’s okay, don’tworry.” His voice is calm, natural,quiet- just for her. By some miracle, it works, even if only by a little, herbody settling into an out-of-place calmness. “We’re good.”

“Keep talking,” she pleads, only slightlyembarrassed now by her evident vulnerability with this man, a total stranger. Nevertheless,she smiles over at him, thankful for his reassurance.

“Oh, right- so, yeah, I’m working at the 90.”

“Beat cop?”

“Yeah. Hopefully a detectivein a few years.”

“That’s exciting,” shesays, but she’s got her eyes closed, tryingto quell the dizziness caused by the rapid ascent of the plane. He chucklessoftly- she presumes at her attempt to hold a conversation with her eyesclosed- and though normally she’d feela little put out by this, she can’t helpbut laugh along with him.

Of all the things she thought she’d be doing on her flight, feeling her lungs fill withlaughter as she took off was not on the list.

The plane lifts, and lifts, and lifts- and then it doesn’t, gliding through the cloudsseamlessly.

A small dingalerts her to the seatbelt sign, which has just turned off.

“So, you’re not big on flying, huh.”

The remark comes a little while after they’re in the air. She’s breathing slowly- the conversationwith Jake died down a few minutes ago, after the plane became more stable inthe air.

She glances over at him, feeling sarcasm brim in her throat-but his expression is soft, of genuine concern.

“No,” she half-laughs. “I’m not.”

“It’s no big deal.”

“It’s just so…annoying. I know, logically, that I’m fine,but it just creeps up on me, I guess.”

“It happens. Sometimes youjust need a distraction.”

He looks over at her, smiling.

“Right,” she says, meeting his gaze.

A pause lingers between them for just a moment.

“So,” he begins, eventually, cutting the tension. “How’s theAcademy?”

“Intense,” she offers quickly, “but I like it.”

“Some of those old drillsstill haunt me,” he shudders. She laughs,relaxing a little. “What do you want to do?”

“Ideally? Captain of my ownprecinct.”

“Woah.”

“Yeah,” she replies proudly, smiling lowly.

“For the record, youdefinitely seem like a Captain.”

“Really?”

“Oh, absolutely.”

“You’ve known me for like, half an hour.”

He smiles, but just as his lips part and he begins to speak again,the plane jolts harshly, the first knock of turbulence.

Amy’s handsshoot straight back to the armrests on either side of her chair, one firmlygrabbing Jake’s arm. She lets go quickly,looking over at him apologetically. He looks as though he’s about to start talking again,reassure her- but he gives up, and only smiles.

Nerves spill into her system like electricity.

This time, it’s notthe plane.

  ***

   “Such a good movie,” Jake murmurs as Die Hard’scredits begin to roll in front of them.

His voice is almost too close- after a couple hours ofconversation, spanning from everything from her seven brothers to his absentpilot father to the best cop movies of all time, they’d decided to watch DieHard, Jake’s favourite and bid for thenumber one spot. However, this had meant picking whose screen to use. She’d suggested hers for two reasons: sothat she’d not have to lean againsthim, and so that she’d nothave to lean any closer to the window, and risk seeing that stomach-churningheight outside. So now, as he speaks, he’spractically in her ear.

“Are you… crying?”

“No, duh,” he replies, sitting back, buthis voice has cracked slightly, exposing him. She can’t help but chuckle. “It’s a deeply personal film to me.”

“I can see that,” she says, unable to keep her smileoff her face.

“Hey, you don’t get to tease me about gettingemotional.”

“What? Why?”

“Earlier? When I mentioned theorange soda thing? You freaked out.”

“Putting it in your cereal isobjectively disgusting!”

“Oh god, I shouldn’t have brought this up again.”

“You should not be as fit as you are.”

“I’m fit?” Hegrins.

“Not… I didn’t mean…”

“Kidding.”

She nudges his shoulder and sits back in her seat. Heatrises in her cheeks- she can feel him looking at her even though she’s turned away, and suddenly she’s wishing she’d worn literally anymakeup, or perhaps something more form-flattering than a giant sweater and apair of leggings.

“How’re you feeling?” Heasks after a moment.

“Better,” she says slowly, and she means it-she’s tired, certainly, from the stressof the morning, but otherwise, she’sfeeling pretty good. Plus, she’s madea friend. “How long left?”

“Uh…” He flicks on his screen. “Woah.An hour and a half.”

“Seriously?!” She looks over in amazement. “That’sincredible. Thank you.”

“Thank you?”

“For keeping me distracted.”

“Oh, right. Don’t worry about it. For the record, it’s been pretty enjoyable.”

She smiles gently. He’s notbad. Not at all.

“Excuse me,” an older voice comes from the seatin front of them. An elderly woman, easily in her seventies or eighties, hasher head poking through the gap between her seat and the one next to her. “Excuse me.”

“Hi,” Amy says slowly, in some disbelief, sharing a brief lookof confusion with Jake. “Can wehelp?”

“It’s just, I’ve beenlistening to the two of you, for the last couple hours,” she admits easily, prompting another shared look betweenJake and Amy. “And I was wondering if Icould ask you something.”

There’s abrief pause as they wait for her to ask- at which point it becomes clear thatshe’s genuinely asking for permission.

“Go ahead,” Jake says, after a second.

“When in the hell are yougoing to ask her out?”

  ***

  As the plane plummets to the ground, swooping so fast Amy’s ears pop, her hand is claspedfirmly over the warm arm of one Jake Peralta, a man she has known for sixhours.

Her eyes are closed, and every thought in her head centres onthe feeling of where she holds him. For the first time in her life, she’s finding her flight’s landing remarkably tolerable.

Eventually, a bump tells her they’re on the ground- then, gradually, bit by bit, they slowdown.

With a deep breath, she begins to completely calm down,opening her eyes and turning to the kind, friendly, attractive man sat next toher- for a moment, she wonders how, today, she got so lucky.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to New York. The current local time is5:30pm…”

“Okay, so I guess this is it.”

“I guess so,” she agrees.

They watch each other quietly for a second- then,simultaneously, break out into huge grins, mirroring each other giddily.

“So…”

“See you at eight?”

“Sounds good.”

[notesofarichlycolorednight]

Fanfic Ask Meme: A: How did you come up with the title of It's the Perfect Story? J: Write or describe an alternative ending to It's the Perfect Story. P: Are you an 'architect' or a 'gardener'? X: A character you enjoy making suffer. Y: A character you want to protect.

A: How did you come up with the title of It’s the Perfect Story?

i wanna preface this answer with: i always like my titles to be symbolic. as much as i can. main titles of stories are a must. chapter titles not so much, but if inspiration strikes me, i’m there.

so i did the same for this story. another important note is that this was a rewrite. and the final important note is that i knew that luke was going to die in this rewrite (i.e., i knew that i wasn’t going to change too much of canon, i wanted the main storyline of the pjo series to pan out as it had in the books)

from there, i believe at the time i was thinking about this rewrite/beginning this rewrite, i was listening to dr. horrible. it’s a short musical (the full title is dr. horrible’s sing-along blog) and it has a song called “so they say.” in it is the line: “it’s the perfect story, so they say.” (emphasis mine)

you really gotta go listen to full song to get the depth of my reasoning, but the reason i chose that particular line in that particular song is because of the fact that this song is so upbeat and there are parts that are really funny. but if you listen to the lyrics it’s really, super cynical and actually quite sad (especially within the whole context of the musical–seriously it’s like an hr, go listen to it).

also i’m a hoe for irony (see also: the second to last chapter, the chapter in which luke dies, that i named “that famous happy end” from the song so close)

long story long, i like to take a phrase from something (a song, a quote, etc.) if it like really fits with the story/chapter, but the something that i took it from also provides context and gives a deeper meaning to the story/chapter. irony isn’t a must, but if it happens to fit and is ironic, i’m down 110%

the rest is under a cut bc it’s get hella long

J: Write or describe an alternative ending to It’s the Perfect Story.

um so…idk if this like actually counts as an alt. ending (this question is worded so ambiguously what)

update: this question was actually quite hard to answer. i had an idea but i didn’t want to go with that. and so i’ve been sifting through ideas all day. so here’s smth i finally felt i liked/could stick with

It wasn’t supposed to be like this.

Luke held Tori in his arms, squeezing her shoulder tighter than necessary, but Tori didn’t even notice. Not with the gaping hole in her chest from Luke’s sword, weilded by that dracaena, Kelli.

They were still in the suit from last night, after she’d just woken up from having been stabbed by her own sword, by none other than Kelli.

Tori was really starting to hate Kelli.

Luke’s beautiful blue eyes were filled with unshed tears. Tori could feel him trembling as he held her.

“I’m sorry,” Luke managed, squeezing her tighter.

“It’s not your fault,” Tori managed. Her vision was already blurring, fading in and out. Luke’s voice sounded far away. Luke opened his mouth to say something but she cut him off, “Promise me something,” she whispered, reaching a shaking had up to caress his cheek.

Luke closed his eyes, his tears finally falling. Tori gently stroked her thumb under his eye as they opened again.

“Anything,” Luke whispered, sinking even closer to the floor. He’d been on his knees before, but now he was sitting with his legs underneath him.

“Don’t…” Tori took a hollow breath. “Don’t follow me.”

Luke shifted, cradling Tori. “I’d follow you anywhere,” he replied, a smile pulling at his lips as more tears filled his eyes. “Off of a cliff. To the ends of the earth.”

Tori smiled, too. “You can’t get rid of me that easily, Castellan.”

“Tori–”

“You can make this right,” she interrupted again, her smile dropping. “Please, make it right again, Luke.”

“Tori, please…” Tears were freely streaming from his eyes now.

“I’ll find my way back to you,” she said with such ferocity, it startled Luke. Then she started shifting, as if trying to sit up. Her hand moved from caressing his face to gripping the front of his shirt. Luke helped her, pressing his forehead to hers. “I promise.”

Her hand went slick and Luke felt her let out one last, small breath. He gripped her to him, silent sobs wracking his body. The only thoughts echoing through his mind: I’m sorry.

When Luke finally managed to get a handle on his grief, he stood, Tori still in his arms, and gently laid her on the bed. Her eyes were closed, skin ashen. He took her hand into his. It was still warm.

“Luke–” Kelli tried, but Luke looked at her over his shoulder, his eyes as sharp and cold as ice.

“Let me have my grief,” he snarled. “You owe me that much.”

Kelli didn’t look happy about it, and the bear brothers shifted, looking oddly uncomfortable. Luke turned back to look at Tori.

He wasn’t sure how much time passed, thoughts racing through his mind the whole time. Of what he should do, what he could do to keep his promise to Tori. He hated that she knew him so well. He would’ve taken his sword and run himself through the moment Tori had taken her last breath, but her words had sunken into his mind and taken root.

“We should go now,” Kelli said, in a harder voice. Luke didn’t turn to look at her this time, only stared at Tori’s peaceful face. Her hand had turned stone-cold.

Make it right.

Luke almost turned to tell Kelli, “No.” and face the consequences. Or maybe start negotiations he could do that.

But then a thought struck him like lightening.

He’d never been proud to be a son of Hermes. It wasn’t just that his father was a shitty at being a father, it was also that anyone unclaimed was crammed in the Hermes cabin. Anyone in there was miserable, Hermes kid or not.

The first that usually came to most people’s minds when thinking about Hermes was that he was a messenger of the gods, sometimes god of thieves, which was dangerous.

Hermes, god of thieves–cunning, silver-tongued, highly intelligent.

Whether he liked it or not, Luke was his father’s son.

And he would use those skills his father had granted him to keep Tori’s promise: he would use his cunning, his silver-tongue, and his intelligence to gain Kronos’s trust. And just when Kronos thought he’d have it all, rip it away from him, like he’d done to Luke.

Only for her. Only for Tori.

“Luke.” Kelli said with force to catch his attention. Luke raised his head, steeling his resolve. “Having second thoughts?”

Luke gritted his teeth for a moment before unclenching his jaw and turning, letting go of Tori’s hand.

“Not at all. Let’s go.”

so uh, apparently i can’t let them be happy. moral of the story. sorry fam, the powers that be have spoken. i am unable to come up with like an actual happy ending for them haha that’s not entirely true, i have smth planned for them that you could call happy, all things considered

i’m not sure it’s exactly what the question is asking, but it does end differently??? luke ends up playing double-agent, working for Kronos, but feeding chb information. this is a great au, like fuck, i’m saving this for later

extra: i almost had luke jump heroically in front of tori and take the sword for her, and die. and then she would become the double-agent if only bc, uh, burial at sea? fuck yeah. and with tori’s impeccable aim, she’d land that flaming arrow right on target. luke? not so much. but then i was like…nah, luke’s heritage makes more sense.

bonus: i’d been tossing the idea of tori taking the curse of achilles and being kronos’ vessel for the longest time for itps before i finally decided on smth else

P: Are you an ‘architect’ or a ‘gardener’?

i’m, what we in the professional business call, a landscaper.

in all seriousness though, for all my stories i’m both. i’ll have certain plot points (big or small) planned out–they need, must be in the story, no exceptions. then i need to get from point a to point b, and the path isn’t always straight/linear. it’s in those moments that i’m really more of a gardener, where i let the characters tell me where to go.

sometimes i’ll spend fucking weeks imagining every single detail in 1080p high-def imax surround sound for a certain scene and/or plot point so when i sit down i’m like

but when i’m on the path between point a and point b, where i may have some vague sense of where i’m going/how to get to point b (or sometimes no sense at all) i’m more like

(this is most often a weird hybrid where i’ll have an idea, but i won’t have a clear vision, and so i’ll sit down and write it and let the characters and the context of the scene take me where it will. the moments when i don’t have any idea of where i’m going are very rare)

but for the past few months *cough*since i’ve started grad school*cough* it’s been more like

when will my muse return from war

(to be fair to myself, i hit serious writer’s block. i’m having trouble coming up with ideas to move the story forward in the direction that i’d like it to go.)

bonus: the whole, “tori became the very thing she was trying to save luke from” was totally a “gardener” moment. didn’t plan it, was just writing and my brain was like wait a minute–perfect

X: A character you enjoy making suffer.

i’m so much better at writing ocs than i am actual characters, just bc i’m so nervous abt mischaracterizing them. whoo boy, can ppl get so mean abt mischaracterization.

and look i understand, but getting all up in ppl’s business is rude and really uncalled for. what happened to being civil? guess ppl don’t know her.

anyway, i mean honestly apollo from the pjo series??? like yeah i write tori in some pretty harrowing situations…heh, but it’s really more so i can explore her character and keep the reader interested, as well as seeing my reader’s reactions (those are the best)

but anyway, whenever she interacts with apollo i always enjoy having her get underneath his skin (he’s very fun to write from an outsider’s perspective and when annoyed)

wait until she meets him as a mortal. he may look sixteen, but he’s like 4 centuries old so you bet your ass tori is gonna tear him to shreds

Y: A character you want to protect.

dude

bruh

this is jumping way far away from pjo-verse, but uh any female character in ffxv deserved better fam like

ya’ll can fucking fight me on this

okay, but also, like actually protect: adrien agreste (my sweet sunshine child) from his manipulative, abusive father (fuck you gabriel, go burn in hell), and promoto argentum (my other sweet sunshine boy) from life’s hardships in general bc he deserves all the good things

♪ ♫“The use of words expressing something other than their literal intention.”♪ ♫

[fitzykreiner]

hello, do you mind me asking what happened with sleepy hollow? I only watched the first season lol

not at all! okay so first off, congratulations on escaping the train wreck early. second, there was a shitload of bs happening behind the scenes, 99% of which we are still in the dark about. the rest is under a cut bc damn.

BUT ANYWAY, the biggest point is that they killed abbie off. like full stop, not joking, they legit killed. her. off. which was a good/bad thing. good, bc nicole was being treated like shit bts & wanted off the show so she could get herself out of the situation. bad, for obvious reasons. also bc they actually thought the show could continue w/o her. 

the first big problem they had was gradually shifting the focus of the show from abbie + her relationships w/ jenny, ichabod, & irving (+ the various other characters in her life that they either killed off or conveniently forgot abt lmao.) to ichabod’s crusty-ass boring-ass family and past. as u saw in the s1 finale, abbie stayed behind in purgatory so ichabod & katrina could leave. katrina stayed, continued to be a fucking nuisance at best, & they introduced a cool new mysterious character played by john goddamned noble and ruined it by making him ichy & floptrina’s nasty-ass son, also the horseman of war. oh and also death is actually ichabod’s old bro w/ a hot bod who was all set to marry katrina b4 ichy waltzed his homewrecking ass in. anywho, boring boring boring bullshit that had way too many storylines happening at once, none of which were interesting in the least. i genuinely forget if we already knew the henry/jeremy and abraham stuff in s1? so if i’m repeating things u already kno, forgive me. i feel like maybe by time s1 was over we already knew henry was actually jeremy who was actually war, bc wasn’t he in 1x06?? whatever, don’t care, he’s a piece of shit

the second big problem is that they sidelined and/or got rid of all of the poc/good characters: luke, irving, cynthia, macey, andy, ABBIE, JENNY, all while introducing cardboard cut-out white people/BAD characters no one gave a rat’s ass abt. oh and also corbin was like completely forgotten abt, until his son came into the picture and they mentioned him like…….twice. but yeah lmfao, it was a miracle if jenny showed up for longer than 3 min & abbie was continually given the b plot and less screen time. 

the third big problem was that they FORGOT ABT THE MAIN FUCKING PLOT POINT. that abbie and ichabod were the WITNESSES who were supposed to be WITNESSING THE APOCALYPSE. like i’m not even shitting you, the apocalypse ceased to be A Thing. (btw what the fuck happened to moloch???? i don’t even remember,) death/headless horseman/abraham was given humanity & a storyline no one asked for & they were really trying to push a weird romance angle between him and katrina since they were together when he was still ~alive. war/henry/jeremy was the next horseman to be introduced, simultaneously w announcing he was the demon spawn of ichy/floptrina. so that was something we had to suffer thru. Crane Family Drama was a BIG tag in this fandom during that time. no one cared. everyone hated it. even the fucking ichatrina stans started getting tired of it, if that tells u anything. so anyway, once death and jeremy were dealt with, idk?? they just forgot abt the apocalypse being a thing???? fuck knows, man. i’ve almost successfully blocked most of the bs in my mind.

during this time, ~s2, orlando got fired. or he was “asked to leave”, so, you know. my man hadn’t given a fuck before, getting fired just let him release the last of the fucks he had. also during this time, the writing was just getting worse and worse. i mean, BAD. like it was on a steady decline since b4 mid s1, but s2 was the relatively small cliff of bad writing before the exponentially cavernous shit hole that s3 became. they started treating abbie like SHIT during s2 and ichabod continually resembled more and more of a flaming bag of dog feces.

but yeah, s2 finale, katrina has revealed herself to be the evil-ass snake we all knew she was, tho the writers copped out by saying she was good the whole time until she started to feel bad for her shitty son & decided to side with him. whatever. bitch was evil from the start. in the finale she starts up this spell to send herself back into the past to kill ichabod to nip the whole resistance to the apocalypse thing in the bud. in the middle of doing that, abbie jumps after her, so they both get sent into the past. there was some admittedly very cool parallels to the pilot w abbie waking up in the forest and stumbling around & bending down to touch the road she comes across, etc. long story short, abbie meets up w past!crane, they go to franklin first, he dies, then they go to grace dixon, & she’s able to send abbie back to the future and reverse the spell. so abbie and katrina are sent back to present day and kathy is pissed as hell that abs disrupted her plans and goes to kill her, but crane stabs her ass b4 she kills abbie. everyone rejoiced at that, let me fucking tell you. that shit was therapeutic. 

s3 starts, they’ve already lost a lot of viewers throughout s2, but the stragglers are still clinging onto the show bc the s2 finale gave us hope that they might be able to dig themselves out of the hole they wrote themselves into. boy were we wrong. it started out alright, we all had high hopes. abbie had left to go to quantico & had become an fbi agent. crane was……..fuck knows. i think he took a sabbatical or some shit bc of the ~grief. it’s been like a year or whatever and all the sudden abbie is bailing his ass out of prison. he got a boy band haircut. they introduced a new guy, daniel, also fbi, played by lance gross, and teased a relationship between him and abbie. they also introduced a new villain pandora, fine, and breasty ross, who added absolutely fuck all to the story and just complicated their poorly thought-out storylines even further. also there was an angel???????? idk, i think he liked abbie and ichabod got jealous. that may have even been in s2, i don’t fucking remember, i wasn’t religiously watching at this point bc i had some sense of self-preservation. daniel was promising, and black, and a love interest for abbie, so of course his ass got the axe. there was a weird and uncomfortable bones cross-over. like, a cross-over with the show bones, on fox. in a desperate attempt to rake in viewers. it failed, to say the least. 

i don’t remember the details tbh, but s3 finale abbie essentially sacrifices herself, again, for ichabod. only this time it was permanent and it was somehow even WORSE bc they had her do it just to further ichabod’s man-pain and journey. they literally had her say that her job as a person and as a witness was to further him, the white guy. she told him and jenny to take care of each other and fucked off to the afterlife. after which, neither of them really mourn this?? whatsoever?? and we find out abbie’s soul was actually placed into a little girl? fuck i have no idea, i didn’t watch it. so anyway, abbie’s dead, ichabod moves to washington, dc, and the show is somehow still crawling along while disemboweled, dragging itself along the dirty ground w bloody hands, begging for the sweet release of death. the writers refuse, and beat the dead horse even deader. bring in a new batch of characters, jenny & joe (corbin’s son) are somehow still relevant, ichabod is a shadow of the man he used to be (mostly due to t-mis’s hilariously lacking acting job, praise be). i can’t tell u anything that happened in s4 bc i at least loved myself enough to not watch that horseshit. 

all in all, it was a cocktail of good ol’ racism, bad writing, and arrogance that was shitty hollow’s downfall.