#the rant I could go on about this...I have so many thoughts about what HoO should have been. maybe one day

[annamaryllis]

I would like to know exactly how luke asking annabeth to run away with him went down.

[beaniegaebie]

i don't really have any solid conclusions about this yet but i noticed A Thing in a rewatch and i haven't found it mentioned elsewhere yet so here we go

(apologies for the appalling image quality you're about to see, i can't screenshot easily rn pls bear with)

OKAY so in the scene where crowley confronts gabriel about "shut up and die", something about the arrangement of book stacks caught my eye a little

the majority of the books are angled so that we mostly just see the page edges and not the spines clearly, EXCEPT for a particularly shiny and familiar colour combo right here-

but nothing too weird going on there, i thought, crowley coloured books in a bookshop so what? right up until i registered crowley's line when we get a closer look-

hhhhmmmmMMmmmm yes yes "everything just the way you wanted" huh, very interesting considering that we know how much thought goes into props huh

and for most of the shots we get of crowley in this position those freaking books are just quietly nestled right there in the corner-

look at that god damn framing i fuckin see you, you glorious bastards

so i paused to see if i could figure out what the hell was up with those fuckers and this is when i absolutely lost my mind, your honour

A and C you say?? in crowley colours???? framed like this?????? localised entirely within your kitchen???

anyway long story short they're two books from an Agatha Christie Crime Collection set (24 volumes, three stories per volume) and guess whats on the mfing front covers I'm-

(its a rant for another post but when paired with this other set of initials spotted in s2 i want to scream actually)

ANYWAY back to the books, through an absolutely unhinged comparison of the formatting of gold text blobs i reckon the two we have here are:

(on top) The Pale Horse; The Big Four, The Secret Adversary

(on bottom) 4:50 From Paddington, Lord Edgeware Dies, Murder in Mesopotamia

(I'm fairly confident but if anyone has a better image to confirm/correct this pls do)

now here is where I'll need a bunch of help from some Christie-heads out there bc I haven't read any of these and I've only seen the tv adaptation of one of them, so i dont know for sure if these are like A Clue, or A Cool Thing, or if I've just fully brainrotted myself into a fun lil corner here? wa-hoo

but here's some initial stuff that jumped out at me after skimming the basics:

(some of) the titles: Pale Horse/Big Four - death's horse ofc, the four horsemen mayb? the them+adam?? ; Mesopotamia is a very biblical choice bbz ; 4:50 From Paddington- azi likes trains i guess? idk that one's tenuous lmao ; honestly no idea with the other two but Secret Adversary feels a tad ominous

iirc Big Four just has kind of an unusual history, it was initially twelve short stories that she later compiled into one, and it was published fairly soon after christie's mysterious disappearance/reappearance

in Big Four, poirot fakes his death at one point and doesnt even let hastings in on it and I'm hoping sure its totally irrelevant to the ineffable bois

part of the Pale Horse story is a group of assassins that basically try to pass off all their murders as being actually caused by like ✨satanic powers✨ which is interesting

christie knew a fUCkton about poisonings thats why she wrote so many into her work and, while i don't believe the poison coffee theory myself, it sure is an interesting link with how cyanide is associated with almond smell/flavour and that metatron chooses almond syrup in particular

(ALSO random side note that is mostly meaningless but I've worked in a good few uk coffee shops and have never worked anywhere that stocks almond syrup; almond milk yes, hazelnut syrup yes, but never almond syrup...? prob just the places i worked though lmao)

EDIT forgotten point: I've seen some speculation that the bently's plate reading "CURTAIN" could be a reference to poirot's last story, along side that alternate scene of crowley ordering the sherry for "miss marple", its just one too many agatha christie references for my melted brain to handle and I'm SUS

so this is where i run out of idea steam and hand it over to you lot because i have no clue what this could mean, if it even means anything other than a cool set feature

is there something here actually or am i yelling into the void just for fun?

who knows, who cares!

[stolasdearest]

Hey sorry to bother you but could I request some headcanons with Gale, Wyll, Zevlor and Halsin taking care of their S/o post jaw surgery? I'm getting bilateral jaw joint replacement surgery in September of 2024 but I have to wear braces before that and they just tightened them today and hoo boy is it painful 😖

Plus it would just be really nice to have something to read while I'm recovering in the hospital. Thank you so much, I hope you're doing well ☺️

YOU'RE NOT BOTHERING ME ILY/P

I myself need tight braces or even surgery due to my overbite so this is right up my alley I got you pookie💋💋 ALSO I WISH YOU THE BEST OF LUCK IN RECOVERY‼️🩷

Warnings: not proofread

Bg3 chars x gn!Tav

Honestly not quite sure what to do with you

Although if you can't talk he might joke about how you can't stop him from ranting now to which you just roll your eyes and smack him on the shoulder

If solids are off the table you best believe he is going around all of Faérun to find the best soups recipes for you so you suffer a little bit less

Gives you a notebook and his favorite pen if speaking isn't possible and he just looks at you with the cutest face while you write, waiting patiently

Insecurity after the surgery? Nuh uh he won't allow it he will worship your entire body to prove it, he'll probably enjoy it more than you I can't lie.

Floored, kinda like Gale he has no idea how to take care of someone "injured" in that way

His new vocabulary is just "what do you need?" And then skittering off to get whatever you might need when he figures out what you need

Water? Food? Cuddles? Do you want to close the curtains?? WHAT DO YOU NEED.

he also gives you something to write notes on but he's panicking everytime while waiting because he feels it's stupid that he doesn't just know what you need at all times but he's trying his best <3

Halsin is probably the most chill and laid back when it comes to your surgery, he knows you'll be fine but that doesn't mean he won't do everything for you

He's acting like you just had surgery on both of your legs and not your jaw— he even asks if he should carry you where just throw up your arms and furrow your brows at the druid while he looks at you like a confused puppy.

Definitely has some natural herbal stuff to deal with your pain, he's so thoughtful.

Can honestly just look at you and tell what you need, He's a very perceptive man which saves you the cramp of writing. It even surprises you how much he can read you but it's not unwelcome by any means.

Probably getting you so many gifts to make you feel better ontop of some smooth sweet words while he runs his hand up and down your arm

A decent cook but if there's something he doesn't know how to make he'll just get it from a restaurant instead, he doesn't wanna risk you not liking it.

Half writing half hand gestures

By the way you move or even just gesturing to him he can know what you want and moves to get it after giving the crown of your head

"I'll be right back with that, my love"

he's so sweet it's gonna give you cavities

He reads to you aswell if you wish obviously

I do apologize if this is bad I woke up like 30 minutes ago and I'm HUNGRY but I tried I hope you like it :3

[crypticmillipede]

[percy jackson spoilers here up through Trials of Apollo and TSaTS]

listen i LOVEE the percy jackson series and its extended universe . BIG FAVORITE so trust me when i say i mean this with the UPMOST love:

gawd damn rick riordan keeps making these little choices in his writing that have me tweaking. like the way this man forgets his own lore. EGREGIOUS. pulls me out of the story. it’ll be the tiniest, most innocuous thing but it gets me everyyy time. happens more especially as you get into the later series, probably bc there’s just more stuff to keep track of. i loved TSaTS but it was especially bad there😭😭 wdym nico started playing Mythomagic in the 1940s ?? why is bianca here ?? and nico, who spends most of his time in the underworld, doesn’t know what the phlegethon is??

it’s other stuff too, i love the series but there so much missing potential for these characters that was just never fully explored.

Jason’s character had SO much potential. hello ???? child soldier trained by wolves since age 2, pressured with unwanted responsibility, forced to suppress emotions, remain stoic, be a leader. Rick could’ve done sooo much with that material. jason should get to break down, as a treat !! instead he comes off as a bit undeveloped, sort of hollow, not nearly as fleshed out as some of the other characters. he’s probably the least-liked main character in HoO, but i firmly believe that’s because Rick didn’t do his character idea justice, not because his concept was ACTUALLY boring. Not even going to go INTO what happened to him in ToA, bc i’ve GOT opinions about that but it’s too much rn.

and don’t get me started on Piper, man. the reveal in Trials of Apollo that [SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER] Piper was queer? GENIUS. SOOO much potential there. but now i’m going back and rereading HoO and it’s making me mad bc we GET Piper’s pov and it’s not foreshadowed or hinted at at all. and it could’ve been SO GOOD you guys😭😭 imagine a version of HoO where Piper’s struggling with Hera-induced comphet, warring with the false memories implanted in her brain vs the way she’s expected to act as a daughter of aphrodite vs the way she actually feels ??? UGH it could’ve been so good. but instead, it’s so obvious that this was not Rick’s original plan for Piper’s character, and it was something he threw in later on. missed opportunity for sure.

in general, a lot of missed opportunities in HoO. So many missed character interaction opportunities, so much that could’ve been delved into but wasn’t! Like I wish we could’ve gotten more about Percy and Annabeth post-Tartarus, see how they’re holding up after that dumper fire.

and i LOVE HoO, it’s my favorite out of the bunch! but i think i love it for what it could be, yk?? anyways yes thanks for coming to my rant, feel free to disagree with me that’s totally fine!! this is so unserious anyways lol just me sharing some thoughts about a series i love

[dootznbootz]

Top 3 books?

Okay, sorry I haven't answered yet as...I'm realizing certain ones I THOUGHT were my favorite are sadly probably no longer. Like I still have a soft spot for PJO and HOO but I'm definitely more critical about it now with learning more. And there's a rant about a book series at the end because I love the first so much but the next books made me a bit sad.

Fucking love the Odyssey. Y'all know that. Take a look, it's my favorite book~ Read that fucking rainbow.

I really love "Walk Two Moons" by Sharon Creech.

I haven't read it in a LONG time but I have read it 4 times. (once even outloud to my mom so then she could know about my favorite book :'D I was so mad when she saw the twist ending.) I was a LOT like Sal in many ways a 14 year old as well. "You smell like grapefruit." lol

I really love "Shadow of the Fox" by Julie Kagawa.

Sadly only the first book. I read it from the Library and then bought it because I liked it so much. My copy literally has a bunch sticky notes where my favorite parts are.

Honestly, if you're into M/F romance with a bit of Aro/Ace spectrum vibes then I DO recommend the first book. Because I really loved that aspect. Gives a somewhat Eugene x Rapunzel (just in aesthetic, not personalities) with how it's a girl who hasn't really seen the outside world (lived her whole life in a temple) and an assassin who was basically not allowed to have feelings because magic sword demon showing her that world and finally seeing a lot of beauty in it.

Rant time :')

I really fucking loved not only the story but then the interactions between the characters. I loved the fact that there were no love triangles and just wonderful friendship alongside the very good and cool slowburn romance. Fun fight scenes. Good writing, yeah.

And... that's why I get so sad with the rest of the series. I don't know if the author was rushed or what but that slowburn became really quick basically right away in the 2nd book. In the first book, Tatsumi was figuring his feelings out more as he had more "exposure" in a way and how he had to be so careful with them because uh, the book establishes how if he loses himself, Shit goes bad. (shit does go bad)

But with Yumeko?? It was really neat seeing her figure herself out. Learn more about herself and the world around her.

which is why I'm so saddddddd

As a whole, I REALLY hate how so many YA novels add random unearned smut. 😫 I read novels for a novel. I don't see why sex progresses the story/relationship. And with how Yumeko's established? Really needing to learn a lot of shit that's not in books? Girl in book 1 gets excited about the "Red Lights district" thinking it's a festival of red lights, in the 3rd book has a "I have to have you now" moment? WITH NO PROGRESSION??? There was no realization or just even "Oh, okay, this is where this going." IT JUST HAPPENS. WHO GAVE THIS GIRL THE "TALK"? THE PUBLISHERS BREATHING DOWN THE AUTHORS NECK?

I'm sorry but she had such funky feelings about it all in the first book. "I read a poem once about a lady who threw herself into the ocean because she couldn't be with her lover. I just felt bad for her... That's what love is, right? It just sounds sad. No thank you." and no one explains it or she never really has a lot of introspection on it.

Like, she just says "I love you" basically but it did not really feel like it was earned?? or like she really figured it out yet. It felt like a "This would be a good moment for her to say it. So she's gonna."

THEN EVERYBODY DIES AND SHE'S LEFT ALONE AT THE END OF THE 3rd BOOK!

Yes, Tatsumi gets reincarnated but that was not satisfying. Everything with Yumeko's father and mother was good. Daisuke and Okame was cute!!! TATSUMI BECOMING A HALF-DEMON??? WITH YUMEKO BEING HALF KITSUNE??? I THOUGHT IT WAS LEADING TO "YES!!! SHE WON'T OUTLIVE HIM! They can be immortal lovers!" but then she DOES. BECAUSE HE GETS KILLED.

The ending did not feel satisfying. I really love the first book so much. I would recommend it, but if you love the characters from the first book read the rest of the series with caution. ughhhhhhhhh

I Waited TWO YEARS for the other books 😭 Not because they weren't out, no, it was because I couldn't FIND IT at the local bookstores! and when I finally did, it was only one of each and I bought them both because I had SUCH faith.

I've had a lot of bad luck YA novels and it makes me sad :'(

[arachnaspi]

This is a rant about a Good Omens post that came across my FYP and it's kinda long so if you don't have the patience/mindset, scroll past :)

--

Ok but like I can't be the only person who thought when Nina confronted Crowley about his feeling for Aziraphale that Crowley's little "oh" moment was bc he found out other people could see his feelings for Aziraphale, not bc he realized he had feelings for Aziraphale.

Idk, I just saw a post abt how someone was saying (I'm paraphrasing this) "with Crowley's character it's so wrong that he's only realizing now he's in love" and it made me go :T because

1. I didn't interpret that scene that way (and I'll say it, I might be wrong and maybe I missed something that the poster didn't)

2. Based on the wording this poster chose, when they complained about how "wrong" it was for Crowley to act that way, it kinda sounded like they were on the verge of citing bad writing, which hoo boy

About bad writing:

First off, everyone is entitled to their own opinion. If you want to say something is "bad writing" go right ahead but personally, I'd love to hear/read why you think that! I love hearing explanations of opinions (but I understand if someone just wants to throw something out there without it being tossed back at them)

Second, there's a difference between "bad writing" and "[this] doesn't align with what I expected/wanted to happen". Both of these have the given premise that you correctly interpreted what was written in the first place. Now, you can say that "can anything in the world really be interpreted correctly bc we all have our own individual experiences and preconceptions that influence how we see the world?" and I'll say yes of course.

"Bad writing", the way I understand it, is when an author writes a story in a way where characters consistently don't act the way they are supposed to based on what was established in the beginning of the story, or some twist happens where any/all character development disappears and it's supposed to sound like a good thing. (I am aware this is not always the case bc like with chemistry and the English language, writing has many exceptions for all its supposed rules.)

In other words, if one doesn't like how something happened in the work, that's not exactly bad writing, that's simply preference. If one didn't like how the author dragged on and on about how something happened that's unimportant to the rest of the story (e.g. describing a blade of grass for three paragraphs when it has nothing to do with the story), or did something to a character only for shock value and erased their development (or even the story's development) in the process, then that is what I'd consider bad writing. This is just my opinion though and I am not a scholar, I just read/watch a lot.

So, when someone says "it is so wrong for this character to act this way in this one instance" it kinda rubs me the wrong way because 1. Did we interpret that scene the same way? (In this case, no) and 2. If we did interpret this the same way, perhaps the author had a reason for the character acting in this manner - after all it's a one-time event. Sure, it's out of character but it's not bad writing since it's not a pattern. After all, we humans don't always act in-character - if your best friend is cranky after waking up late and clumsily spilling their coffee everywhere in their half-awake haze, are you going to tell them it's wrong for them to act that way after what happened to them? Why are we expecting well-written fictional characters to always hit their beats when we don't do that ourselves?

Maybe I read into this more than I needed to but I had thoughts and nowhere to put them. But if anyone wants to healthily debate or comment on anything I said, feel free! :D And if you want me to clarify something, I'd be happy to do that as well.

[phoenixwatchesmovies]

What I'm Watching 2023: February

And here we go... I hit the image limit this month! 😅

The Neverending Story

This movie traumatized me back when Disney Channel would play it every other weekend, and it continues to do so. It was good to come back to it after too many years.

Vertical Limit

I'm actually surprised I could find gifs for this, tbh, as I didn't think anyone remembered this movie. I liveblogged this one, with some commentary and observations. It was fun.

The Mountain Between Us

Different enough from the book to keep it feeling fresh, though it felt like something was missing. Don't get me wrong, it's good, it's just that so much of the book was internal, and that doesn't translate well to screen.

Along Came Polly

Another rewatch. Nice to know this one still makes me laugh.

Wolf Creek

Hoo boy, this was something else. It owes a lot to The Texas Chain Saw Massacre, and it was most certainly made in the mid 2000's, right at the start of the torture porn era of horror. Not to say it's terribly gory, just that it's graphic and very, VERY mean-spirited. A tough watch, but I'd watch it again before, say, The Texas Chain Saw Massacre.

Scream 2

A near perfect sequel, if you ask me. I'm planning on ranting about the franchise in general once I'm finished with it, so that's all I'm saying for now.

The Lost Boys

Yep, rewatch. At this point, it doesn't take much before I'm waxing poetic about allegories and how this is a tragedy in disguise as a coming of age story, and I'm probably going to have a look at the sequels, so expect more about this later.

Evil Dead (2013)

HOLY FORKING SHIRT BALLS, THIS IS AWESOME. At first, I wasn't too sure I wanted to give this a shot, since remakes generally suck and I wasn't too keen on the level of gore I'd heard about. Thank the Dead Meat channel on YouTube for finally talking me into this, because this was one of the most fun viewing experiences I've had in a hot minute. Again, expect a franchise rant!

Scream 3

Can't poor Sidney catch a break?

The Princess Bride

Everybody knows this movie, and if they don't, they should. This is the greatest movie ever made, and I will hear no arguments to the contrary.

It (2017)

HELL FUCKIN YEAH, I ACTUALLY WATCHED IT, AND I'M STILL MAD ABOUT HOW MUCH I LIKED IT! AND I'M PROBABLY GOING TO WATCH IT AGAIN SOMETIME!

Scream 4

What am I going to do with myself when I'm caught up with this franchise?

The Black Phone

Second time around, and I made Sis watch with me. (This would actually make a really good double feature with It Chapter One, tbh...) Solid all around, and I've enjoyed Scott Derrickson's work before, but Finney and Gwen are easily the strongest elements of the movie. I'd take bullets for these kids.

Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring

By happy accident, I finally stumbled across the extended version! Which means I got a whole extra hour to cry about everything!

The Evil Dead

I'll save most of my thoughts for a franchise rant, but I'm fairly certain this one is somewhere on my top ten horror list.

And because I can't help myself, our rewatch rewatches this month are:

Labyrinth

The Shining

A Nightmare On Elm Street

###

Now, maybe I'll get around to The Last Of Us sometime in March...

[xinambercladx]

I'd look that way at him too, Officer...

What a man.

.....

.............

..........

.................

What .............

a

......

man!

..........

................... If you made it this far, I assume you actually follow my blog. At this point, I warn you, I'm going on a rant about something I'm very not happy about. You have been warned. If she sees this, then whatever. She and I disagree on a lot of things, but this really pissed me off. ............................

........

.........

Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one who wants him to be just HIM. No overthinking or overanalyzing or projecting. The worst I project on him is being a foodie. Maybe that's why I've been slowly disappearing from the rest of the fandom. I can't simp over their versions of him. I have to put their versions of him in a separate box, far, far removed from my version and the canon version. I just can't see him as sad and pathetic. I need him to have that controlled danger. I need him to be strong for me. He's one of the few things that brings me comfort, like he could protect me from all the uncertainty in my life. "Everything'll be alright, lil' lady. Just sit tight now." ......

Just read a post about my blorbo getting torn to shreds by grasping of straws. You just... how can you be so desperate to emasculate the manliest of men? His guns are rusty? Where? I don't see any rust. It's just the type of metal the light. Zoom in, I dare you. His guns aren't rusty at all on that junkyard night scene that took place mere hours before. Get real.Crying over his mentor? They were rivals, not lovers. There is literally no evidence for your fan-girl forced ship. There's only mentions that they used to work together. That's it. And by now? He's killed so many copies, he's desensitized by now. He owed his mentor a few favors, but he works with his son out of obligation. It's well established that he's obsessed with getting even, getting paid, and getting on with the next job. Speaking of sentimental... Yeah no. That's not his journal or coins or medallions. Check the context of where the little girl found her confiscated phone. That's right. She found it with the other confiscated items. The journal and medallion and the phone were items that once belonged to his bounties in a compartment in the same room as the holding cells. Why, answer me, would he keep anything remotely as personal as his own journal within reach of a prisoner? He wouldn't. Because those items once belonged to prisoners, not himself. He'd probably pawn off everything in there without a second thought for money.I don't think Cleef gave two shits about his mentor's son. He might have thought it entertaining for a while, but after being betrayed, he most definitely gave a shit, but for revenge, not for old time's sake. Even when Cleef killed his childhood best friend, or rather, had his friend kill himself for betraying him, he "wasn't in the celebrating mood". Was he crying then? About someone he was best friends with once? No. Not one tear. Cleef, who is obviously not who I'm really talking about, is who the character is based on. Every single character that Cleef portrayed in old westerns was badass, stoic, and old school masculine. Stoics aren't crybabies going "boo hoo, I'm just a sad, lonely cowboy with no friends." Shut uuup. Show that essay to any self respecting man and they'll roll their eyes all the way to the ocean. He's maybe salty about it, but not with fucking tears. "That's all I've got fer today. GO AWAY NOW."

Stop degrading him.

[usernamesuggestionsarefunny]

“Lost Crown” by Sarah Miller has issues (Or I am extremely nitpicky when it comes to OTMAA)

I love “Lost Crown.” I may repeat that a thousand times. It is an almost perfect book and I doubt any Romanov historical fiction book will ever compare to “Lost Crown” in quality of writing, characterization, historical accuracy, depicting the love this family had for each other, wholesomeness, and pretty much anything else. I have reread that book three times. I admire Sarah Miller a lot for what she accomplished, hers is one of the few books I have re-read and I swear I hate re-reading the same books, so this is a huge deal.

If you are looking for a review praising it though, you are in the wrong place, because I actually think the book is flawed and I am going to be talking exclusively about said flaws (Single flaw? It depends on how you see it, it is mostly one issue).

I love “Lost Crown”, but I am also ridiculously sensitive regarding Sarah Millerʼs attitude towards Alexandra and Alexei, the latter most of all, because he was a child.

“People can stomach the political necessity of executing the tsar, the empress, and maybe the 13-year-old heir to the throne, but there was no reason for those four sisters to die”- Sarah Miller.

That is from an interview. I can not find the exact source, but I am sure I read it somewhere and that it is accurate. Sure, she was talking about what OTHER people feel about Alexeiʼs death when compared to OTMAʼs, but she did NOT make her own opinion known, which makes me think she either doesn't consider that way of thinking discusting or even disagrees too much.

Wow, Miller, really? Does that mean that if Nicholas had removed the Pauline Laws you would have “stomached” the deaths of these girls you wrote a masterpiece about better?

Nothing against Sarah Miller herself, as many people outside the niche Romanov fandom bubble have this mindset, but I genuinely find these sorts of comments and opinions gross. For any who think like that:

A) Premeditatedly (And assuming you are of sound mind) killing innocents for super logic and pragmatic, even downright Einstein level of genius political reasons is just as evil as killing them for any other reason. Yes, ANY other reason. Come at me with whatever “buts” you like. The reasoning of murderers throughout history may be diverse, more or less understandable, or even nonexistent in some cases, but if the effects are the same (Innocents end up dead as a consequence of their immediate actions), then they are just as evil in my eyes.

B) They also had political reasons to kill the girls. They could have been used as a White symbol of resistance against the Bolsheviks, who also wanted to demoralize the upcoming armies by killing the entire family (Further proof that “tactical” doesn't take away from the “evil” of it all).

C) He was 13, the literal youngest, you psychos. His murder was as wrong, sickening, shocking, and unjustified as that of his sisters. I don't care if he doesn't fit your aesthetics OTMA-edit-blog-whatever “Which Romanov Sister are you most like?” quiz or feminist college dissertation on how OTMA were overlooked in favor of him (Bo freaking hoo you care more than OTMA, who loved their brother, did, get over it).

Ok, rant over, let's get to the point. This all brings me to the only aspect of “Lost Crown” I have trouble coming to terms with: It is obvious reading it that Sarah Miller feels little for Alexei, projects those feelings onto the girls, and the worst part is that people don't notice. Well, I do. At first I thought I was seeing things, because not a single Romanov enthusiast had pointed out the same stuff I have issues with, but then I read that quote in the interview and thought: “Maybe I am not so crazy after all, I may be a sensitive little bitch, true, but I am not crazy” lol.

It should be said that I don’t think like this because I consider Alexei’s characterization on Lost Crown bad, on the contrary.

Alexeiʼs characterization is perfect in my view, and it is clear that Sarah Miller did her research on his personality, which is not what troubles me. She might feel “little” for him (Sorry, vibes she gives) but she does feel, I have never claimed she is not compassionate. It is hard to read about him without feeling a twinge of compassion. Sarah does feel for him and his illness, it is clear she does.

The best portrayal I have read of Alexei in Romanov fiction is actually from Sarah Miller’s Lost Crown. It is clear she TRIED to write him with a lot of empathy and sensitivity. But here is the thing, Sarah flawlessly described the POV of each sister but decided not to include Alexei’s POV, which I believe she would have been perfectly capable of handling. I read a review that said that Sarah probably knew too many POVs would ruin the book, but I think that is just silly, because four POVs are already too much. If you are fine with using four I don’t think a fifth one would ruin the story. Sarah is a talented writer, if she had wanted to include Al, she would have.

I think maybe Sarah felt Alexei’s POV was unnecessary for a book marketed towards teenage girls, or that it “ruined” the almost perfect young adult theme of the four sisters. I mean, even “serious” nonfiction author, Helen Rappaport, left Alexei out of the title of her “Four sisters” book, even though the book also talked about him a lot, almost as much as it talked about each of the four sisters individually. Alternatively, Sarah didn’t WANT to include his POV because of reasons already mentioned, she didn’t feel as much for him, which is fine, I mean, it is her book. This is not necessarily the issue.

What I truly freaking dislike are all those scenes where “Olga” is literally jealous of Alexei. Once, because he was allowed a friend to play with him in Tobolsk while her own friend was sent away (Ok, fair, that made a lot of sense), and the second time, when he was comforted in the Rus because he was afraid of the gunshots (The soldiers were killing seagulls). It makes sense Olga was afraid and wanted comfort as well, especially on the infamous Rus where they were not allowed to lock their doors, but her character gave these vibes: “Why DoNt theeyy comfOrt uus? Whaat about uss? He doesnʼt even need it as much!! His fear is not ValiD in comparison to ours!!! I am so jealous and resentful of my brother and I am totally Olga you guys!!!!”

The worst part is when Tatiana is jealous that the fake rescuers wanted to take Alexei down the window first (Oh, I don't know… maybe because he was ill and taking him down would be the hardest thing to do?! Maybe because as Sarah Miller HERSELF said, his murder made most political sense, and at that time, it was logical people thought he was in the most danger??), and “Tatiana”, the most mature, virtually Alexei’s second mother, and the best friend of politically astute Olga, who was bound to know all of this, was jealous, something we are the readers are supposed to view as “fair” and sympathize with.

I would have believed this jealousy arousing from fear coming from Anastasia, the youngest girl and almost a child herself, but not 21-year-old Tatiana. Romanov fans love bitching about authors making up fake cat fights between the girls and antagonizing them, which I sympathize with, one of many reasons “The Tsarina's daughter” was trashed (As it should be) and I don't want to read it. But Sarah Miller makes Tatiana jealous of the fact her disabled brother (Who it makes more political sense to kill) is being put into consideration first in a dangerous rescue attempt and no one bats an eye only because “Lost Crown” has more prestige in the fandom, and “Tsarina's daughter” was in general inaccurate, had insulting scenes, and the author had the nerve to give it a more satisfying ending by making Tatiana survive (Oh no! That didn't actually happen! The horror!! How dare the author put fiction in that fiction book!!!!).

I don't care anymore if people come at me. It is almost perfect, but some parts still irritate me and feel as insulting as parts of “The Tsarina's daughter”, or even the “The Last Tsars” and “The Passion of Marie Romanov” scenes where Maria has sex with a guard. Yea, THOSE scenes. There, I said it. Parts of “Lost Crown” actually offended me MORE, because Maria exploring her sexuality (gasp! horror!) with a guard in FICTION is not as bad as “the Romanov sisters mocking their little brotherʼs fictional self-harm issues” in fiction (I will get to that). Oh! And an added plus is that the author of “The Passion of Marie Romanov” is, as I am, just as horrified about the murder of Alexei as she is about the murder of his innocent sisters, as everyone should be.

Not only are Olga and Tatiana irritatingly jealous and resentful of her brother... but Anastasia is irritatingly jealous and resentful of her brother. The one described as the closest to her brother is. She is suuper annoyed about the family focusing so much on him after they all arrived at Ekaterinburg. Picture this: She has been separated from her parents and favorite sister, her other half of the pair, for weeks. She has missed Maria and wants to see her “so much it is pathetic'' (As she similarly described in a letter), she has worried for their well being and their conditions for weeks, and instead of being happy about the reunion, she is resentful about her brother receiving more attention from his mother for his silly “so painful it can make you pass out” hemophilia attack. She literally says something similar to “what is the use of being together again after weeks of worry and longing if people are paying so much attention to my sick brother, also, I totally am Anastasia, the same girl that wrote a letter to Ekaterinburg talking about how sweet Alexei was, you guys, the same girl that tried to cheer him up and make him laugh when he was ill you guys” *rolls eyes*

“But usernamesuggestionsarefunny...” you say, “you are too sensitive,” you say. “They could have had those thoughts of jealousy for their brother in real life because they were human!” You say.

I am fine with the authors exploring less than perfect sides of the characters (But Alexei-related jealousy issues are the go-to for most Romanov fiction writers, it is overused and rarely done differently, I said what I said), it is fiction, and in real life they weren't perfect and must have had their fights, we just have less information on that. What I don't like is when the narrative doesn't call it out as something wrong, or it villianizes, even if slightly, one of the characters, making you take the other characterʼs side even when, once you reflect about it, is not 100% guaranteed. It is especially obvious why these scenes annoy me when you consider we don't actually get Alexei´s POV. Sarah Miller didn't give us one. So we are just supposed to sympathise with Olgaʼs and only Olgaʼs thoughts and feelings of jealousy, not with Alexei´s own fear of gunshots. We are supposed to sympathize with Anastasiaʼs feelings of jealousy. We never know if Alexei sensed this resentment coming from his favorite sister, how it made him feel if it did, sometimes he is almost treated as some obstacle of sorts to the girls´ happiness instead of a character, I don't know how to explain it, but it is so blatant and annoying.

Oh wait! None of what I mentioned before is the worst part of the book, the part that angered me the most, that angered me more than “Maria having fictional sex with a guard” levels of anger. I leave that for the last part of my rant: The worst part is that Sarah Miller literally implies that after they arrived at Ekaterinburg, Alexei hurt himself on purpose. Now, I don't think this is true in real life, but I understand why Sarah Miller got the idea from: Nicholas´s diary entry, where he mentioned that Alexei bumped his knee against the bed “as if on purpose”. I personally think his expression was meant more as a “This is so freaking inconvenient” or “Why did it have to happen now?” kind of thing, like, Alexei was not in the best health before and now the bump had made the situation worse, you know what I mean? Maybe Nicholas was even annoyed at Alexeiʼs carelessness, but that is it. I donʼt think Nicholas meant he LITERALLY thought Alexei had done it on purpose. He just didn't, in my opinion. It is also possible he was simply going through a typical puberty growth spurt, which as most teenage boys and men are aware, makes you a bit clumsy because you are growing too fast and can´t calculate the size of your limbs lol.

Now, I am not bothered by Sarah Miller's interpretation of Alexei doing it on purpose. It wouldn't bother me even if it could be 100% disproven (I literally support escape plot fictional additions in Romanov fiction for the sake of the plot/story/character development/satisfying end/you name it wholeheartedly). It is fiction after all. I just want serious elements added or included in the story to be treated with the severity they guarrant.

Sarah made the girls aware of the fact their brother might have hit himself on purpose, which, considering his illness, would have caused him a lot of pain, like, A LOT, and it did. He kept his family awake with moans of pain in real life. I am sure Sarah Miller knows about this. I am sure by this point in his life Alexei knew his own body enough to realize this as well if it were true that he did it on purpose (Which I genuinely doubt). This tiny “detail” she decided to include in her book was literally self-harm.

Well, she made the four girls dismiss their brotherʼs self-harm as something selfish he did for attention, and I felt sick. I knew girls in junior high, around Alexei´s age, who did this. No laughing matter, and SUPER out of character for OTMA, even, I would venture, Anastasia, to dismiss this with a laugh as they did, but for some reason not even literal Romanov experts and scholars in the book reviews who are faaar more knowledgeable than me noticed this, maybe because they were blatantly tricked by the narrative (And so were you).The girls making light of their brother self-harming is treated by the narrative as a “cute” and “funny” sister bonding moment (It literally is treated that way, why did no one else notice? Why am I the only one upset about this?). The girls were right and their brother is an attention-seeking asshole for self harming. Also, self-harm is funny and if people do it “for attention” (Which in fact means there are deeper mental health issues that should be attended to), it should not be taken seriously. That is what we are supposed to get from that scene.

This wouldn't bother me if, again, we got Alexeiʼs point of view of this situation, so we the readers could see why he is doing what he is doing and empathize, maybe raise awareness to the serious mental health topic of self harm. Like seriously, hemorrhages into the joints, or in general some hemorrhages cause a lot of pain, and I think Romanov fans underestimate just how much. For example, in Spala, he sometimes had to pass out to be free from it. If he had bumped his knee as a form of self harm knowing it would cause that sort of physical pain, it would have probably meant that his emotional pain was becoming almost unbearable to cope with. That is one of the explanations people who self harm give (Not the only reason people self harm though, and it is much more complex than that), that the physical pain distracts them from the emotional pain. Like seriously, few people would go through that pain for attention, but we the readers are just supposed to believe Alexei was “playing with his illness”, and that he was not taking into account his motherʼs *cough cough his jealous sistersʼ cough cough* suffering.

Like for real, read the following passage from Anastasiaʼs pov and imagine if Alexei had been a 13-year-old girl and her older sisters mocked her self-harm issues behind her back, we would be calling the sisters bitches, Cinderellaʼs step sisters. If the older sisters were older BROTHERS people would go even further, some would call them abusive and uncaring pricks. Think about it for a second, how the way the narrative portrays something tricks you to see this as a “cute” sister bonding moment.

~

Every time the crowd in the doorway thins, I can see our brother sitting there in Maria’s cot like it’s a striped throne and he’s Tsar Aleksei II.

“I bet he hurt his knee on purpose,” I whisper to my sisters.

“If that’s true, I’d like to take him across my own knee,” Olga says.

“Olga!” Tatiana scolds. “How could you?”

“After what we went through for all those weeks because he was too sick to move? It isn’t fair to play with his illness like that.”

“The first time was not on purpose, Olga.”

“I know it. But think of how Mama suffers. It’s selfish of him.”

“Mama doesn’t seem to mind,” I say. “She looks pretty pleased to have someone to fuss over.” Tatiana’s jaw falls open so far her teeth ought to drop out. “And the only good part so far is that Mama’s hovered so much, Aleksei hasn’t had a chance to notice his own dog is missing.”

“Don’t, Nastya,” Maria begs. “Not on our first day all together again.”

I shut my mouth, but what’s the use of being all together again if everybody’s going to set up camp around Aleksei’s cot and never mind the rest of us?

-

Lmao I can't with “Anastasia” here. She is so selfish and annoying, sue me.

Nooo, H-O-W D-A-R-E Alexei have legitimate mental health issues as a result of his imprisonment when the book is about OTMA and THEIR thoughts and emotions during imprisonment? How dare I expect Alexei to be treated as a character and not a prop or obstacle to show how nice the poor girls are to put up with his spoilt ass, the attention he gets and his silly "selfish" cries for help?

Sarah actually does give us scenes of Alexei coping with the separation from his parents. His character is treated sensibly while he is at Tobolsk, and to that I give the author a lot of credit, but if she had already touched upon Alexei’s coping, as well as some of his feelings about the separation and of his illness, what was the need to include this fictional self-harm mini plot then? To make it about the girls and how much it annoys them? This is another thing I have noticed, a small minority of exclusively OTMA fans, most often people new to the last imperial family (so Sarah Miller has no excuse lol), talk about Alexei´s illness as if the only real victims were the girls, the people forced to”put up” with it and how much their brother's illness diverted their mother's attention from them, and Sarah Miller does write about Alexei´s illness like this in SOME parts of her book, which is infuriating. This does NOT mean the girls were not deeply affected, or the side effects of his illness, including potential favoritism, should not be mentioned or even extensively explored in fiction, but I don't like when it is made out to be the only important thing, when Alexei is right there, literally about to die in excruciating agony or something but... oh,well.

By the way, how come no author writes about how it affects the girls to see or know their brother is suffering? How come that is not made into a source of conflict for them? Pierre Gillard literally writes it affected their moods, never mentioned jealousy. Like seriously it would be super interesting, kind of accurate and still focus exclusively on the girls if that is what the author is most interested in, but I guess writers prefer to project THEIR personal “my parents loved my youngest sibling more than me” traumas onto OTMA lmao. I mean, Pierre Gillard said his sisters worshiped him, which I genuinely think is hyperbolic and immensely whitewashed. I take the “too good to be true” memoirs with a grain of salt, just like most people and *clearly* Sarah Millar. Of course the girls were human, and I think they got fed up with and bored of their brother once in a while, but if Pierre wrote that they worshiped him it was because he mainly witnessed love between them, more than fights or resentment, and he wanted that love remembered. Why is it the LAST thing remembered in Romanov fiction then? Why does Sarah Miller gloss over that at the worst possible times?

Romanov fans know this is a book true to reality that has no escapes or twists, so this self-harm side-plot leads to NOWHERE in the narrative, a total dead end (Absolutely no pun intended). It was literally added for the “lols”, or as a mini side plot. I hated it, I truly did.

How dare I expect something as serious as self harm to be given importance by the narrative after the author herself decided to add it to the story for no reason at all when she could have easily explained the incident away as an accident? Like seriously, that diary account from Nicholas is all we have and in no way is Alexei doing it on purpose the only valid or even most obvious explanation. If you still want to write about it, good! It might be interesting! But treat it S-E-R-I-O-U-S-L-Y I guess I am super sensitive but that is just me. I literally can't believe no one else has pointed this out.

Not everyone will get the reference, but an example of characters being treated unfairly by popular characters, and the narrative wanting to make you side with the popular characters, who are being unjust, is the case of Percy and the twins from Harry Potter. I love the twins and don't care for Percy that much. The twins are my favorite characters, but the fact is that they were bullies to Percy, and the narrative never called this out. It made you side with the twins and not Percy. It made you angry at Percy for his admittedly cruel actions but not the twins for their unwarranted mocking of their brother. After Percy apologized, the twins should have also done so, but this never happened. According to the narrative, the twins did nothing wrong.

Obviously, the popular characters in this case are the Grand Duchesses, who in Lost Crown didn't actually do anything nearly as bad as the twins. It was just gossip and private thoughts, but again... Alexeiʼs POV people! We don't get it! Or at least, if Sarah didn't want to write it or it took too much space, an explanation of his self-destructive behaviour through a heartfelt talk between the siblings. The narrative convinces you that the way the sisters are talking about their self-harming brother is completely fine. It never calls it out, it never proves them wrong, in fact, most readers didn't notice nor cared, but might come to internalize the belief that people who self harm are attention seeking, or that people that are chronically ill are wrong to have mental health issues because they are not being “grateful” enough to the people who care for them, they are being “unfair” to them, and not “appreciating” all the caretakers have had to do for their sake. It is a pretty toxic message, I don´t know, don´t mind me, I am a sensitive little bitch.

Alexei behaves horribly with Anastasia in Ekaterinburg as well, by the way. I hated him in that scene. He “pranks” her in a way that could have easily killed her. But the anecdote is told from Anastasiaʼs POV, we rightfully side with her and see how scared she is. The narrative shows us Alexei crossed the line, that is the difference.

To be honest, this other book is objectively less accurate, but I preferred “Anastasia and her sisters” to “Lost Crown”. Sure it has a made up romance between Anastasia and Botkinʼs son, and you know what? That innocent fictional addition is not nearly as harmful as Sarah Millerʼs diary-entry-based self-harm side plot and the possible message it sends to the readers, something that, admittedly, she may have not realized as she wrote it was harmful.

Another thing, this is more tongue in cheek. The only sister who never thinks of Alexei with humorous over the top resentment is, as far as I can remember, Maria (At least my fave Maria escaped from that terrible detail in the girlsʼ characterization lol). I appreciate Maria never did so, not even when Alix said “Thank God it wasnʼt Alexei!” when Maria hurt her eye. The only thing Maria thought was that her motherʼs expression hurt her feelings, which I completely get. I mean, that line was so obnoxious and obviously put there to show the readers how horrible Alexeiʼs existence was for the girls lmao, and it is impressive that Sarah Miller held herself back there from making Maria have an internal monologue on how little her mother loves her even though it was clear what Alix meant (Though I still don't like the line, it was downright cruel, sure Alix could have said it in a moment of carelessness, but in context with the rest of the book, it sounds as if the author was trying to tell me: “Look how poor OTMA were neglected by Alix in favor of the brat Alexei”). Mariaʼs love for her brother is also connected by the narrative to her nurturing nature and longing to be a mother, which was so ashfkdfhgdfgi I loved it! I canʼt believe Sarah Miller seems to think the same way as I do, that Mariaʼs personality makes it unlikely she was not as close to her brother.

The fact Maria is often talked about as the “jealous” one or “least close” to her brother for literally no reason (no evidence whatsoever) makes me consider the fact she escaped this book intact from resentment a triumph honestly, at least in that aspect I applaud Sarah Miller.

Tatiana doesn't escape from the rescentful part of the characterization, and many of the times she worries about Alexei, she clearly does so solely for her mother's sake (Literally, when she is caring for Alexei she barely thinks of him as a brother but as her motherʼs “sunbeam”, when Alexei calls for his mother in a clearly upset tone because they just literally ARRESTED his sailor nanny, Tatiana is like: how ddaaare he annoy my poor sick mother!!! When he is EQUALLY SICK!!). I loved the way Miller portrayed Tatianaʼs love for Alexandra btw. Tatianaʼs love for Alexei just doesn't appear to be as genuine as that of Maria in this book.

In conclusion, Lost Crown was almost perfect, and I have waaay less problem with the book than I have with the way the fandom blindly worships it as if it were the Bible of Romanov historical fiction. Sure, love it! I have read it 3 times and plan to do so again, maybe that is why I noticed these details while other fans did not, maybe I love it more than you do guys lol. In fact, I advise you to read it again, or buy and read it if you haven´t, maybe you will do so with new eyes, maybe not. But don't just appeal to it as authority on what good Romanov fiction is. Lost Crown is far from perfect, and if you have stuff you have issues with (I hope someone will say something in the comments, maybe even something new, and prove I am not alone, lol), or you like another Romanov fiction book more, even “silly” and inaccurate “they escape” fantasy books, you should be free to speak your mind without being called ignorant.

[akuma-homura]

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#and now it feels a little awkward to go back and post something..... maybe it's still okay and like i could still post something but

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

a couple more disjointed thoughts on Meguri

I love the little changes they’re doing, like how Satoko sees Rika’s 100 years of misery-- Eua forcing her to see it without her asking and all, and her reaction to it-- being WAY more understandable than her reaction in the Anime, which is... hardly. Any at all.

Eua being way more clearly manipulative, too. And how she describes looping for a bit-- testing out in the other fragments, THEN sending her back to the main world to repeat those steps?

That ominous line how not all of the worlds are better than her current one-- I’m so curious. Does that mean she’ll end up experiencing the tragedies herself too? Or something like them?

I just love how Tomato is going about all this, at least as of this chapter. I have-- worries still, but honestly by biggest worry is how Teppei’ll be handled.

I CANNOT actually even talk about him without ranting each time, because each time I think about it, the less sense his turning over a new leaf and situation around it makes sense. He’s not even related?? Like, he’s the brother of Satoko’s stepfather. That’s the connection. AND her abuser. Why does HE get the looper memories first and foremost, in such a profound way?

Like, they seriously cannot try to tell me her abuser, not even related by blood, is closer to her than the fucking club. We DID see Keiichi get some memories, but that ended up not even REALLY being used, or meaning anything, and the rest of the club also got jack shit-- even when it seemed like they SHOULD of remembered SOMETHING. (>looks at Rena)

They literally ONLY used the memory leak for fucking Teppei and to force a new-leaf-turning for him, him of all people. And it still just upsets me since they do that on TOP of Satoko going through her villain arc, and making her a bloody one-note villain at that.

And considering Ryu07 has said things in the past about wanting to make him not the villain or whatever however it was phrased, I just. Currently assume that Tomato will have to follow it, and even if they’ve been doing good changes right now... how in the world do you handle that?

I guess one way to make it seem less egregious is having the club members also remember stuff more and obviously, but even then, I’m just.... hoo boy.

13 notes - Posted January 30, 2022

#4

the funny thing about the swimsuit madoka transformation is that, in any circumstance disconnected from magia record the game, I’d think that it looks kinda neat-- maybe it’s the Vocaloid fan in me with how many PV’s are done, but I think the live2d animation is charming

...it’s just the issue is this is in Magia Record, where most all of the transformations are outright anime-esque animated. Even if not all of them are Quality Quality, they’re still like, fully animated

and thus this transformation just feels--- odd.

16 notes - Posted August 11, 2022

#3

See the full post

17 notes - Posted March 1, 2022

#2

I actually really like how this new chapter of Meguri was done

Showing how like, clearly broken Satoko was after that basically solitary confinement experience-- Rika actually trying to call out to her, but Satoko reacts... well, gives her a dead look, which I don’t blame her given what she. Thinks happened.

Her not even speaking on the drive being pointed out? Keiichi noticing something’s up? God. Of COURSE they’d notice they were all best friends-- and Keiichi being the big bro surrogate-- 

and god. Her looking longingly at the group and thinking back to the old days. My heart. I’m so, so so so sad for her...

NOT TO MENTION the fact Eua swooped her up there, at the moment, in that moment of longing. There’s something about that I like WAY more than the weird horn touching thing in the anime?? Like it FEELS way more like Eua grabbing her in her low point, in her moment of pain, of longing, of... just. God.

This is good. This is keeping my hopes up. Tomato, I believe in you to make Satoko’s downward spiral more true to her and not just ‘lets just imply what happens to loopers and not actually Show it in process and just Show her going from how she was to ‘mwahaha imma break rika’ like nothing’

30 notes - Posted January 7, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

tbh that actually seems like it could help smaller creators, like-- promoting their art or commission info or something, but

1: it’s tumblr. paying for that feels like it would be asking to get hate mailed by some tween

2: still not sure if i trust tumblr with money information

182 notes - Posted April 18, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[schlurp-schlurp]

realised a trans guy i know hates trans women & children irl and i gotta say, jesus christ, i ????? idk what i even want to say, i just want to scream at the void and check i'm not going insane

dude came out like 8/9 months ago and i've ended up being somewhat of a mentor for him regarding wtf UK laws are and answering questions about binding, packing, etc. had no clue he was so vile / slurping up misinfo on the side.

anyway i was at the pub when we found out a mutual acquaintance is transphobic (he thought the other trans man was a GNC girl and that i was a cis guy, topic never came up before) so i was started to gently guide this guy towards less extremist views and just kind of like?? explain that trans people are people?? i was exuding a pretty chill aura and tried to basically hold his metaphorical hand and be patient.

anyway, i was fully expecting the conversation to be uncomfortable, but jesus christ it got so bad so fast because the trans man i know started expressing HIS opinions on trans people and hoooo boy. hoo boy. ohooooo boy.

if he ever has a trans child he won't let them go on puberty blockers, particularly if their future hypothetical trans child is A Female because "it's important they go through puberty" and went on a rant about bones????

he completely refused to listen to me when i explained that PB's as a kid require biyearly bloods and x rays and that there's 101 ways side effects can be prevented *if there are any at all*

he went off about how you can't know you're trans until you're over 18, but specified that "females, sorry, yknow, like biological females, yknow, people like us" (brother in christ, there is no "us" rn) actually can know they're trans earlier because their biology means their brains develop faster so they can have kids early, while "male" brains don't develop properly until they're 25 or older because ?? well, there was no weird bs explanation for that, he just decided that trans women specifically have to suffer for an extra 7 years if they need to medically transition or access any kind of therapy.

i bought up that this is literally the same talking point that transphobes are using to restrict trans healthcare in the UK, referencing The Cass Review ("what's that?" - HOW HAVE YOU NOT HEARD ABOUT THIS???) and how there are suggestions to disrupt the trans healthcare of adults between 18 - 25.

i also mentioned that, yknow, i knew i was trans at 13 and came out a month later at 14. hells, i would've known i was trans earlier if i knew what the word trans was.

he claimed that he *always* knows if a woman is trans based on her looks ????? fucking what??? bro. buddy. what the hell.

i rebutted this by trying to explain that for all he knows, all our friends could be trans. he won't 'clock' trans people that pass, so of course he's only going to notice the ones that don't pass.

it's dumb as balls - i know so many stealth/somewhat stealth trans men and women. hell, just this week i found out one of my mates is also a trans man LMAO, i've known him for a year and had no fucking idea. he also had no idea that i was trans until this week. monumental spider man moment

claimed that trans women are inherently dangerous bc cis male rapists can pretend they're trans women and advocated the idea of making trans people use the wrong bathrooms until they'd had bottom surgery.

seemed to be completely confused by the concept that if trans women are made to use the men's and trans men are made to use the women's, all those hypothetical cis male rapists can pretend to be trans men to get into women's spaces. plus they could just walk in, or claim they're a janitor.

he also had no fucking clue this would be enforced when i questioned wtf the plan would be. he seemed to believe that "you just know" when someone's had bottom surgery. how????? what????? dude, if you want to root around people's pants to check their genitals, you do you, but i'm quite happy just using the cubicles regardless.

he bought up transtrenders. i had flashbacks to 2016 tumblr ngl. hnnnngh why??? why??? ??? gods.

ironically, if he was on tumblr back in the horror days, he absolutely would've been called a transtrender and gotten death threats - like me! thank u random tumblr and instagram users for telling me to kill myself as a 14 year old wearing a flowercrown who was already being bullied irl and just wanted to experiment with his fashion style.

but yh, he wears fishnets and skirts and eyeliner - he absolutely rocks them, but like, bro how are you gonna complain about trans people not conforming to strict gender norms and how every trans man that's pregnant/wears skirts/touches a colour is a dirty faker bc they didn't immediately kill themself while you're literally rocking a GNC look?? bro. BRO.

on the topic of transtrenders - he mentioned a cis woman we met at a pride event, a lady with PCOS & facial hair - he claimed that she "wasn't even trying" to pass as a woman, and that he thinks she's faking being trans.

SHE'S NOT EVEN TRANS!!!!!!!!!!! bro!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! gah. hells, even if she was it's still fucking stupid to decide someone's gender based on whether they've got hair coming out their face ffs.

said u shouldnt medically transition until you've had trauma therapy, and explained that that's why he's having trauma therapy, bc he wants to make sure he's "all good" before the NHS "rushes him" into treatment. buddy you've got another 4 years MINIMUM before you even get seen. i'm glad he's seeking therapy for his issues, but his experience isn't a bloody monolith for all trans people.

TLDR - i can't. i can't even exist rn. this happened last week but it's just been killing me.

[smol-warrior-1258]

Sooooo I was gonna hold off until the full season was done, kinda give the TV show time to play out as an adaptation instead of being distracted by the alterations being made for this version. Because alterations are okay! I think if you're going to adapt anything from one medium to another it should be to express the content in a new way based on the different limitations & possibilities of one medium vs another. You can't do PJO [the TV show] exactly as written in PJO [the books] - it doesn't work and shouldn't be the point - and I think the show is doing a great job to consciously avoid that trap. (My personal opinions on how several first-person narrated book-to-movie adaptations have fallen somewhat flat is a post for another time.)

And so, I was planning to wait. This is a franchise I hold very dear to my heart and have cared about for more than a decade, I recognize that I will be protective about how a story like this is being shown to a whole new generation and may influence them. I wanted to see how the shifted motivations, etc would progress objectively even if I couldn't see how it would get its way back to the story I know from the book. Let this new version run its course and go from there. You can absolutely shift some things and let the narrative move on a slightly different path without losing the heart of it - it's something fanfiction has really helped me embrace despite my initial impulse to bristle at changes to the stories I love.

But I just watched ep 3 and . . . I'm frustrated.

Everything just feels so shallow?

And I want to be clear: I don't mean bad acting. There are a lot of moments where I enjoy the delivery and the emotions the cast are putting out, and their portrayal is a separate thing from what they are portraying.

I am talking about the plot & the relationships & the characterizations & jfc the PACING. I don't know how to be cohesive about this because there's so many things that just make me so apprehensive about this show hitting deep enough emotionally by the end. It is so empty at the moment and I haven't been convinced that that will change as of yet.

Without further ado, an incomplete list of my thoughts thus far:

Oh uh . . . THIS IS MADE OF SPOILERS . . . so yeah

Gabe. I genuinely do not hate - or even really care enough to dislike - Gabe? What? I just. Just how? How can that even happen? This is such a distracting point because Gabe is a character that is supposed to be fundamentally irredeemable. Full stop. So plainly a nasty, abusive, toxic, utter dirtbag that Percy making the "warding-off-evil gesture" designed for monsters causes a reaction to a mortal. He is such an integral part of Percy's (let alone Sally's) character through a good chunk of the first book in particular, and even later on in PJO & HOO Let's be real here: Tartarus smells like Gabe to Percy even after years and I don't think you could get more on the nose than that. I really just don't understand how the show can drop the ball like this. I can - and might, once the season is complete - go on a whole separate rant about Gabe, but I think I've made enough of a point for now.

Let's talk about blue food. This show has done A LOT of verbal exposition all over the place. About everything. Like maybe kinda too much at times if we're being honest. So where is the explanation for the blue food? You have this poignant Thing about Percy burning the blue jelly beans as a sacrifice bc it's precious to him and yet give 0 reason why beyond the fact that his mom gave it to him? This isn't some fun easter egg for book fans to squeal over in the background bc it's a tiny fun reference you'd only notice as a reader - this is a developed plot point that (again) is recurrent throughout PJO & HOO oh and also ties back to Gabe being a dick for no reason but moving on not to mention a specific example of the bond Percy shares with his mother specifically in the abusive environment she endures to keep him safe. I would not be surprised if they do this bit of exposition later on, but the omission really made it feel hollow.

Which brings me to Sally Jackson, our queen. I like a lot about the portrayal that's been shown so far in terms of her alone, but I really didn't feel like we were given enough to show the relationship between her & Percy. This relationship is so so SO important - and I think the show recognizes that on a surface level to the point that it's altered the plot to confirm that she's not dead from the beginning and make that Percy's openly stated motivation for the quest - and yet I feel as though we've been 'told not shown' that fact? Sally is actively present for such a short amount of time to begin with and it's therefore even more important that her significance to Percy is given sufficient weight for the audience to buy in quickly.

Something that threw me off right from the beginning was the pacing. I think I actually did a sort of shocked double take after Mrs. Dodds went down because it's, presumably, the crux of that episode and yet was a blink-and-you-miss-it kind of scene. Then again with the toilet scene! There was no real build up or follow up; it just kinda happened? It's like all the important pieces are there but nothing is being given the space it really needs, no room to breathe, no time to let the audience be drawn in to the story & it's characters. Emotional/plot beats go by so fast you hardly have time to absorb them while other scenes are longer but still empty. Percy's introduction to the Hermes cabin & the montage (which was very fun btw) of him during capture the flag come to mind in that regard. Scenes where you have time to take it in but there's not much there to take. I don't really know what to do with that I guess? It makes it hard to judge what I'm supposed to find important and that throws me off.

Maybe this is kinda still pacing, but I feel like many of the opportunities for suspense/surprise/tension have been totally missed (if not outright sabotaged). There are instances earlier, but I am still reeling from the Aunty Em scenes. I'm trying not to be stuck on "in the book" rhetoric because that's a different beast, but I really have a hard time understanding the benefit to altering the reveal in that way. Same thing with the formal announcement that Sally was not killed - Percy barely has time to grieve before being told she's alive, and any suspense that might have built by Percy mulling over her fate is ruined. Other scenes, like the Furies on the bus, feel like they have no stakes because they're dispatched so quickly. (Okay yeah this is clearly still tied to the pacing lol). There are smaller moments where I also felt the 'told not shown' rearing it's head. Places where they say something is important but don't show anything to back that up. It's like despite all the stuff about how their quest is dangerous and how dire the circumstances are, there's no actual evidence that that's true? They're in a cab and then the bus and then strolling through the woods and then killing Medusa - all with no visible damage or noticeable repercussions to them. I just haven't felt any payoff from their successes because their successes aren't made to look like actual accomplishments.

Look. This isn't the movies. I saw The Lightning Thief [movie] in theatres (quite possibly on opening weekend) and went from exhilarated anticipation going in to actually literally ranting with my friend on the way out. Those movies were barely based on the source material and that is infuriating as a fan of such a quality series. The main frustration there *was* that MANY significant things were missing and/or different from the book not to mention the flagrant disregard for the basic plot. That's not what's going on here, at least not for me.

This is disappointing in a different way because I'm (mostly) able to step back from the fact that certain moments in the book aren't being show here (looking at you, hacky sack scene) or are being adjusted for this newer version; there are elements I'm definitely enjoying for themselves, and I can see potential in some of the changes long term. I'm going to watch through because I am willing to put some faith in a wonderful cast and Uncle Rick that this will come to a place that does the story justice.

But at the moment? I'm just not there yet.

[rainingincale]

Thats it! I'm tired of this grandpa!

Pls do not read beyond the cut if you do not want spoilers for Rick Riordans Books, mainly percy jackson and the kane chronicles thnx xoxo

For context, I'm in the middle of The Son of Neptune which is the second book in the Heroes of Olympus series.

So far I have read The OG Percy Jackson series, The Kane Chronicles, The Lost Hero (Book 1 in HoO) and some of the extra side books. I have basically been trying to read everything roughly in chronological order.

Anyways! I'm just very pissed because I went into this endeavour of reading all these books because people RAVE about how much they love Percy Jackson and I was like ok I would like to understand what this is about.

So I read the Percy Jackson Series, and I really liked it! I do think if i was younger I would have enjoyed it more but I could definitely see why people enjoyed it. Its got the cool adventure, the jokes and the friendship.

Then. I read the Kane Chronicles. And by Jove. I wanted to love the books. Because while I liked Percy Jackson, most of the characters were white you know? And thats not the Worst thing. But the Kane Chronicles had the extra bit of diversity that I had kind of been missing (I could go into a huge rant about this but im just going to leave it at that, if anyone truly wants to hear more about it feel free to ask but this post isnt about that). Anyways! So I started optimistically, I liked the style of writing, I liked the Egyptian mythology, i really liked the characters! Especially that the main two were a sibling duo. I thought it was super fun. But the thing that genuinely sucked ALL the joy out of the series for me. Was the romance with Sadie, who starts the series being 12 and turns 13 in the second book, having a romance??? With??? A 16 (16!!!????) year old?????????????? It honestly made me hate the books, I couldnt enjoy them once that storyline started going (which mainly started in the second book and theres only 3 in the first place so 😐)

Anyways, I ended up semi-skim reading by the last book. I liked the plot mostly but the romance genuinely made me just want to get the book over and done with I hated it.

And then! I got onto Heroes of Olympus! (I Actually read The Lost Hero before the Kane chronicles because Chronology but anyways) So I start these books, and from what Little i know of the series, These books are the reason everyone loves Rick Riordans books so much. So i was excited! All I knew going into it was that people really like these books and that this is where Nico Di Angelo is featured a bit more (tbh thats more of an assumption, I just know people Really like him and while he was cool in the OG Percy Jackson books he was hardly there).

So here innocent little me goes, I read the Lost Hero and I loved it! I loved the characters, Piper, Jason and especially! Leo ❤️❤️❤️🥺🥺🥺 It was super funny and I enjoyed the storyline a lot. I literally could feel straight away why people would love this series.

And now. I'm reading Son Of Neptune. And it started strong. But why the FUCK!!!! Am I getting ANOTHER potentional (which is probably going to fucking happen from past experience) ROMANCE between a 13 AND A SIXTEEN YEAR OLD!!!!!!! Like what actually goes on in someones brain for them to think that this is normal and fucking alright!!! And why!!! Have I never seen anything about it mentioned before!!!! I have so many bones to pick with Mr Riordan and anyone that has ever recommended these books because like dudgdhshdh I hate it!!!

Im back to basically just trying to read this as fast as possible now because I just seriously cant be fucked with a weird fucking age gap like that, its just totally unnecessary and the story would've made just as much sense if their ages matched. I will probably still finish the books because Ive come this bloody far but I'm so fucking pissed. If anyone would like to console me feel free djdvcjd I have lost months of my life reading these books 🤣😭

[newathens]

oh my god, you’re the first person I’ve seen say anything negative about Will (idk how popular Will actually is bc I’m not super involved in the fandom despite loving pjo more than anything bc I kinda hate it there) but thank you, I thought I was alone in my mild dislike/apathy towards him!

Nico is one of my favorite characters from pjo and I want to be excited for the new book so bad but I can’t help but be worried that the Will and Nico relationship is gonna end up being like a main focus, and I just cannot bring myself to care about it bc I do not care about Will

I feel like this is part of a larger problem that Rick has where he seems to think that every character needs a romantic interest no matter how shallow or rushed the connection they have is, this is especially prevalent in hoo imo (one of the many reasons why I think it’s the worst series of the group) which is where Nico and Will as a couple are first set up

If Rick had bothered to give them even a little bit of build up for their relationship then maybe I would like them more but he didn’t, he just threw them together, gave them a couple of cute (ig) scenes together and then suddenly they’re dating, which doesn’t even make sense for Nico’s character imo, also this is just a personal thing ig but I really do not think they’re personalities go well together or that Nico would actually like Will all that much but idk

Anyway sorry for the rant I’ve just never been able to get these feelings out before lol

don’t apologize! im glad to be able to give u a response haha

dislike for will was a lot more prevalent a few years ago. time and fall in popularity of pjo on here got rid of that; also i think pjo twt has some weird obsession with him. you’re not alone in your dislike! his fan service-ness radiates off him in waves. when BoO came out i was shocked hearing about them becoming a thing. it never made sense and many of the scenes i’ve come across between them in that book feels forced.

their relationship in trials of apollo is a bit better but that’s only cause riordan has more time to develop them; there are still many points in ToA that feel weird or cringe-ish. to me at least will comes off as a mama bear, in a bad way. i’d say this is because nico seems to be handled more childishly by the author than he did in pjato and will happens to be the conveyor of that.

will could have been given some substance by having a more present role in apollo’s storyline, but unfortunately that didn’t happen.

i could keep going on and on but everything you’ve said is absolutely right and i understand your feelings in concern to the nico book. i’d say go into it looking for things you enjoy and always hold out the hope to be pleasantly surprised. we really don’t know what this book is going to hold anymore—personally im hoping for a titan vs titan fight!

[arcadejohn127-9]

What if Mc was a person who don't take shit from anyone, demon human or Angel, and just was this small sassy piece of dynamite? How’d everyone react?

MC who takes no shit - brothers + undateables

Satans pact and chapter 16 spoilers

Lucifer:

So you've chosen death

This man can't even handle the smallest sign of defiance

an actual bitch boy

"You are here because you were picked to attend, you were listed to be under my care, this is MY house! You follow MY rules-"

"hold that for a second, I'm calling Dia."

He's so easy to rile up

You feed off his quick temper, he makes it too easy

But he deserves it

Too many times he thinks he can just control you and his brothers

You've cut Mammon down from the ceiling, when faced to Lucifer you just handed him the rope

"If you want someone to hang so much, do it yourself, old man, it is your fault after all - if you didn't leave your cursed valuables lying around Mammon would of never tried to steal them and get himself cursed."

Mammon:

He both scared of you and in awe of you

He's surprise you're still alive at this point

Of course you're alive, the great Mammon is looking after you

You have definitely called him out for being a tsundere

"So, you wanna make out or do you wanna keep yammering on?"

"I- You can't just be saying that to demons!! Why would I wanna kiss some human-"

"Kay, I'm going to go see if Levi wants to-"

"WAIT! DON'T DO THAT!"

Whenever he steals something from you or the others, you go on a man hunt

"Sell your own stuff! You always have something new in there! or are you that scummy and bad with money you need to steal off others ?"

Please have some mercy with him

In general, finds your sassy attitude interesting, always wonders what the new comment or roast will be

Levithan:

Scared and in awe but times it by 10

Is mostly terrified because you make him upset

Didn't expect to be called a guilt tripping bitch

"You're busy? I get it, I mean - why would you ever want to spend time with someone like me? I'm just some nobody, a yucky otaku who no one wants to be around-"

"I get having a low self esteem but shitting on yourself at EVERY given chance and then go on to be about how yucky and worthless you are when I just wanna spend time with someone else?! You can fuck right off!"

He thinks you're a delinquent, has gotten you a cool jacket so you can put it over your shoulders

You can pat him on the back for at least being able to stand up for himself, he's always ready to brawl and never shys away from calling his brothers out

Always lets you wear his headset and just watches as you cuss and sass any petty player

Satan:

It seems you keep choosing death

You wanna get sassy and back talk the literal embodiment of wrath????!

So - do you want be buried or cremated?

You take none of his shit

He respects it just as much as he hates It

We all know he has good control over his anger but there's a limit on how much of your attitude he can stand

"You're so petty, do you have to be a smart-ass about everything?"

"that's rich coming from the guy who threatened to cut off my limbs because I wouldn't make a pact wth him."

When he doesn't respond you just nod to yourself, checking your nails

"Yeah that's what I thought."

If he needs to come up with a good come back he always asks you

Sits back and watches you argue with Lucifer

Asmodeus:

He loves it until you call him out

Didn't expect to get psychologically profiled

"At first I thought you were just a narcissist but now I see you're just a Insecure man who placed his value on his looks and how people perceive him-"

" You can't seem to handle any type of bad press about you-"

"Oh? Did you make yourself look bad then blame it on someone else because they just wanted to do what they please? Oh boo hoo!"

You could end this man's career with a single word

But, if you're 'no shit' attitude is targeted to someone else? He's all over it

Will sigh dreamily and watch you chew Someone out

Unless you get super roasty and rude - he encourages you to talk to him with an attitude

"You're so hot when you talk like that~"

Knows you aren't all sass, he definitely enjoys your more softer side

Will invite you to a sleep over so you two can gossip and rant over a bottle of wine and do a mini spar

Beezlebub:

What prompted you to be this sassy? He's baby!

I mean, he did throw a fit when you ate his custard and destroyed your room

Sure, constant hunger is painful but he can survive without one custard

Yeah- he can be up for roasting and being chased out

"You've told me you literally want to eat me! How is that comforting?! You're hunger tantrums are already bad enough but now I know I could be on the menu?"

"No thanks! Do the hokey pokey and turn your goofy ass around!"

Has a habit of being your stool, he doesn't mind really, finds it pretty adorable actually

You're so small compared to demons so when a gym jock is being rude about you or Beel

You just snap your fingers and he'll sit down, hunch over and put his hands over his head

You'll just step on his palms (you take off your shoes angrily whilst telling the jock demon to not move an inch) and just go off

He understands where alot of your cusses come from, he agrees with you and feels guilty on his behaviour

Really likes it when you stand up for him; normally no one does that because he's such a big guy

Belphie does it but things can be abit disheartening when your twin Is the only one rushing to help you

Belphegor:

You know what? Understandable, please, fire away

Just keep making jokes and references to all the bad things he's done

He needs to be put in his place

The dude has literally killed you! If you weren't going to give him an earful when you recovered then what was the point?!

This man is one of many bastards in this school

Either watches you go off on people or sleeps mid arguement to stop hearing you call him out

"I'm innocent, I haven't done a single thing wrong in my life."

"wELL-"

He will always respect you for looking out for his twin, when he can't do anything he always looks to you to step in

Has held things out of your reach just to watch you get mad

UNDATEABLES↓

Diavolo:

You've chosen a fate worse than death at the cost of sassing a pure man

He gets upset but is very understanding, it's his companions who will handle your fate

I honestly, CANNOT, think of a reason you'd want to be sassy or rude to him

If it's just in general and not meant to offend him; he thinks it's very attractive

You've got a silver tongue and able to make a comment without much thought

Very impressive

His type is Lucifer very simple

You'd call him out for letting dangerous behaviour happen at the school and putting loads of faith into Lucifer

Perhaps point out how reckless inviting humans to a demon realm - who could easily be killed if they don't have an escort with them at all times

But other than that? He's safe

Barbatos:

He is your executioner

He can handle a jab

But he will remind you he was the one who saved you if you get too out spoken with him

that only gets him more cussed out though

"So you're aware of pretty much every event that happens, Right?"

"You could say that."

"Then shouldn't you use those abilities to then help anyone and stop all sorts of tragedies?"

"My Lord has stopped me from using my powers freely."

OKAY THAT'S SOMETHING YOU CAN CUSS DIA OUT ON

In general, you just make comments about how vague he is

He's too mysterious that it's just ridiculous

You want to get to know him but he just gives you that smug look and amused laughter

Solomon:

Can you really be blamed for being Sus of him?

He's so suspicious, for what?! For what reason?!

He doesn't like being called old? Depending how disrepectful you wanna be, you like to use the nickname "Grandpa Solo"

"I'm surprised you aren't actually some evil Wizard trying to get the brothers pacts so you can be the most powerful human alive and take over the Devildom."

"Who says I'm not?"

He's witty and smug

You're sassy and explosive

You're a duo that should be feared

The two powerful humans banding together? I'm sure there's a website on the two of you with theories of your evil plans

Simeon:

Finds your attitude delightful!

Didn't want his kindness to annoy you but it did, sometimes it is a crime to be Too nice

His favoured company are all sassy bastards so it only makes sense he likes you very much

"You gave them bangles that made them into SAINTS! that's fucking weird! And you had them turn into angels despite the fact they have truama from heaven!"

as mischievous as Simeon can be

His angelic nature really does pop out alot

"aren't you tired of being nice? Don't you want to go ape-shit?"

"Of course not, there's no need but thank you for worrying about me, I know I can seem force and strange to you but I really do enjoy being kind to others."

"disgusting."

Almost fought him during the TSL event; you didn't expect him to do a 360 and become super strict

Despite your hard shell you care alot about the people you're close with and can't stand to see them upset

Luke:

It appears you're trying to throw hands with a 10 year old

He does seem demonphobic

Why are you always denying your true feeling??!! Just admit you like demons!

You try not to swear and be outwardly rude Infront of him

But sometimes this little boy really tests your patience

"Okay species-ist."

Is your main response when he's being a tsundere

He's the one who's the safest from your attitude

[rosemary-bells]

okay so i. um. coughs. i f. i finall y read the luke anny ssr card story. voice acting and all. and. i. h. hoo boy.

i'm just gonna go in and start screaming for a few paragraphs maybe possibly. im not one to review things at all but whatever i have like a hundred years worth of things to say. i was gonna go n post abt this as i read but then i was like na h ill just make a bunch of memes and cry later

like first part(s) of the story i was already screaming and crying over that flashback where hes arguing w aaron. highkey i was like bro is this rly the time to tell luke to make this romantic. rly. then later on it was nothing but sadness and heartache and crying and i was like yknow what maybe he was right about this

first meme! i saw peanut and i was like oh m y god. my little boy. my baby. hes back. highkey i miss the kid. he's not present enough in luke stories lmao. the fact that luke styled the lil handle on peanut was. hooo. i was like man i cant believe this is the perfect man maybe? (im kidding. hes far from perfect but he is baby.)

also highkey during his classical music lore session i was like "lmao shouldve made it fur elise" and then i was like Hm. i also highkey love the fact that they changed the music for the music box bits. that was cute. love that they used the main theme on the default card screen too. very nice

every time he mentioned larping schumann or brahms i was like man is this rly the time lmao. altho i am happy it brought him resolution

meme two i dont have that many memes again most of this is just me ranting for a bit. the voice acting was literally peak though. every time he yelled, or even every time he was quiet, you could really get all that hesitation and heartbreak, all at once. it was amazing. it was heartaching. loved it. i cant speak for the other dubs since i use jpn but like. i bet they were. immaculate.

also highkey im still so miffed that they didnt give rosa voice acting. i could rant abt this for hours but to keep it short, like. mhy is always at its strongest when its not making a self-insert, yknow? in some cases, self-insert characters work, but when your choices don't matter too much, in an otome game, which are mostly character driven, trying to make her too basic is just kind of eh ig. she does get a pretty solid character from what we have, though. like, shes got a strong personality. very passionate abt justice to the point of embarrassment. very honest. is generally driven a bit more by her heart than her brain. like seafood. that sort of thing. she's already her own character, so i just wish they gave her a va. its gotten to the point in which ive literally started imagining a va for her. she kind of sounds like shirayuki (jpn) in my mind...

also man fr he really did think that romantic partners were the only way to receive proper emotional support. she has friends, man. she's a strong kid who you left for like, 8 years. have some faith in her, yknow? also god, that line where he was like "As long as he can make you happy." god. that just stung, man. im thinking abt him in other routes and like, 3/4 times he really just gave up, didn't he?

on that note i also thought the towel that he was using to dry her hair was just. on top of her head the entire time, so thinking abt all these dramatic scenes w her just doing that was funny. ik thats not how it worked but like still. also did she rly run to her parent's house in that outfit? in the storm? ik she wasnt thinking but oof dude shes gonna catch the worst cold after all this blows over

that kiss scene though. man. the orchestra music playing. i always love that theme, even if it does feel mis-timed at moments. it just feels so refreshing. rly does make it feel like a "kiss of fervor" (also how he just caresses her arm during the kiss. how gentle. what a sweet guy. he rly just wants to comfort her.) he even used 大好き instead of just 好き like man. ... man.

and then that bit where they called each other their greatest treasure... and then, how he said "I swear, I will do everything I can to live, so that I can be with you." man. it was cheesy but it rly did feel like the rainbow after the storm. it rly is all abt learning to love yourself because of how loved you are. like wow. man. it rly is abt loving someone so much that you want to live for them. live w them. man.

all in all, super cheesy card. it was a short-ish storyline, but i highkey loved it. it was cute. it was precious. i nearly cried. (more or less did when i found out his badge was called "Luke's Vow" like hooo. oh my god) i Enjoy. looking forward to the 2nd anny's cards....

the final meme. its another version of the last one but hey accurate lmao i was shaking crying screaming sobbing throwing up the entire time but by god was my heart full