#the questions grow every day
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one of the mcytubers I follow has college aged kids and every day I think about them. Do they think their dad being a Minecraft YouTuber is cool? how do the feel about their college tuitions being payed via plushie sales? do they know there is erotic fanfiction about their real life father and his best friend? every day the questions grow.
#how fo they feel about the fact millions of people refer to two thirty year olds as their dads kids#how do they feel about those thirty year olds (who are also Minecraft YouTubers) calling their dad daddy. on like. a Regular basis#do they know? do they intentionally try to know as little as possible?#the questions grow every day#tbh i dont even follow this guy for Minecraft stuff. i like his phasmo streams. but its Way funnier to call him a Minecraft YouTuber.
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What can I say? They're my favorite.
#twdg#twdg clouis#clouis#twdg clementine#twdg louis#sometimes they creep back into my mind and i'm like 'ah yes' like a crow admiring a pretty stone they found years ago and kept#also thank you pi for the screenshots. i used to have a whole folder full of them but that was when i was doing themed nights#the source for these is me i just have a random document full of dynamics and ship things i enjoy because.....i dunno i like keeping track#and so many of them apply to clouis but there's also an overlap of with clouis and rose/alistair [my warden from origins and alistair] like#alistair's romance route is like an evolved matured and extended version of clouis sksksks gee i wonder if i have a type#look you present me with a character who deflects with humor and isn't taken seriously by the rest of the group and the longer you know the#the more you realize how high they've built a wall around themselves and how *unwell* they really are and how they're not as sunshine#as they present themselves and also they avoid leadership and responsibility until they grow closer with someone who pushes them#and they end stronger and more balanced as a person while finding the affection they've craved#and also there's the daddy issues#present me with that character as a romantic option and i'm in no questions asked okay i don't want the mean broody one that's meh to me#i want the one that has every reason to be broody but chooses not to be because they have a completely different defense mechanism#and a warped sense of themselves and self-esteem issues they leave unaddressed until forced to face them#i'm just saying i'm aware that i have a type i'm always going to gravitate toward clouis nearly checks all the boxes#also the lack of clouis these days? my crops are thirsty and i have too many ongoing projects to do anything about it other than this sksks#so until i make time to finish my long ass louis/clouis analysis this is the best i can provide for now
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what's the level of mental illness called where you start getting invested in winteriron in 2024
#like what am i doing is the question i guess#every day the 2012 avengers tower au in my mind and heart grow stronger and more beautiful.....................#LIKE THIS WAS OBVIOUSLY INEVITABLE given my whole situation but oh my god..............#doodling them during a meeting and sighing forlornly#kayvswords
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everyday i look at the hoyoverse fandom and go “wow… media literacy IS dead😃”
#nobu.nobu.chat#firefly isnt a waifubait simply bc the trailblazer showed up in her trailer for a second#she quite literally says one day i wish to live as firefly#she wants to be her own person she wants to be FIREFLY not SAM not GLAMOTHS IRON CAVALRY not STELLARON HUNTER#she wants to be FIREFLY and the first person to truly see her as that is us aka the trailblazer#the trailblazer is literally us a self insert it doesnt matter if its stelle or caelus its us the player#so its us who saw firefly as firefly and not as anyone else#topaz was looking at jade real funny#yeah wanna know why? bc shes being manipulated#why did u think numby hid behind topaz? bc pets can sense bad ppl#ppl are so quick to hate a character without seeing them first#jeez i wonder why… lets certainly hope it isnt bc jade is a villain and a well written one at that#and thats the main reason for villains to exist🙄#villains are there to be hated to be questioned to be against#especially when they are written well AKA jade in this case#not every villain/antagonist is supposed to have a sad sob backstory or to be relatable or to be simpable#theres a reason why we hated characters like gaston the evil stepmother when growing up#its bc they were written as a villain so well#and u can hate/dislike a character while enjoying the way the writers worked for it to be perceived such way
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o wait before i start posting any pics.. i was thinking that maybe.. you guys could help me liquify this gender some more by switching up what you call me.... DON'T GET ME WRONG I LOVE . LOVE LOVE LOVE WHEN YOU USE HE/HIM AND JUST OVERALL LIKE MORE MASC STUFF THAT'S SOOO MMMMMMMMMSO FUCKING GOOD like i don't get to feel that irl at all so it really does make me so happy but i've just been thinking abt TRYING to switch it up more yk? does this even make sense...... . hhhh anyway i might won't even like it and i'll want to just go back to hehim but i wanna try... JUST TO SWITCH IT UP.
#i think the only term that is incredibly questionable is “queen” lmao#idk i have some personal beef with that one#MAN I REALLY MIGHT JUST DELETE THIS IN LIKE FIVE MINUTES#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#WHY DON'T I KNOW WHAT I WANT#i'm not asking you to fully drop the he him but just maybe.. use she her every once in a while..#I'M GONNA EXPLODE WHY IS THIS THE WEIRDEST POST EVER TO MAKE WHAT IS GENDER CAN SOMEBODY TELL ME#btw if anybody happens to be wondering why i don't just use they/them#iii just don't feel anything towards those#personally#like they don't make me feel like anything while he him and she her are more like yes:3333#does.. does that even make sense#oh my god#there are question marks flying around my head#i read this fic the other day#which is in my drafts i need to add tags to it#but the op just.. like made my brain grow two sizes#bc they made the reader genderfluid and then proceeded to use both “girlfriend” and “boyfriend” throughout the fic and i just#HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#how do i .. get that#asghdhsaghdasghdshagdhgas#GUYS LOOK I'M GONNA SPIRAL I'M JUST GONNA HIT POST#ENOUGH#mayor of loserville#mickey vs gender#10 - 17#I'M LOSING AGAIN OHHH FUCK OFF
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I certainly have my own concerns about the treatment of moo deng but um. well i think some of you may just be racist
#this ^ isn't directed at any post in particular but instead a lot of comments ive seen. but now im gonna talk about other posts down here#and prefacing anything i put in the tags here with DONT TAKE MY WORD FOR IT DO YOUR OWN RESEARCH#but the biggest post ive seen going around rn about moo deng being mistreated and the general quality of khao kheow zoo is questionable#claims that the enclosure is mostly concrete seem to be false from all the sources i can find#the concrete section looks like its specifically around the feeding area which fits zoo care guidelines which specify that the feeding area#be a surface that can be easily cleaned separate from the substrate and is a surface present in other zoos#the lack of deep water also seems to be purposeful? older videos of the same enclosure show deeper water areas#and looking back through the news every baby pygmy hippo announcement from every zoo i could find mentioned periods where the baby had to#learn to swim and was slowly introduced from shallow water to deeper water as time passed#this was also corroborated by fowlers zoo and wild animal medicine volume 8 which suggests keeping the mother dry and then slowly#introducing water as the baby grows as a potential best practice#damn im treating this like a paper now. anyway the negatives#there are absolutely things that strike me as bad eg. public access to the hippos and the way the keeper interacts with them#for the keeper stuff in particular i'd really like to see input from someone who has experience as a zookeeper with pygmy hippos#the public access is something that i def think the zoo could improve on and even older footage from years ago shows people sticking like#selfie sticks and shit off the side of the railings and right into the hippos faces#however again the zoo seems to be making efforts to curb visitor behavior which is tough when you go from having 800 visitors a day to#4000+ and you can't remodel the whole exhibit right then and there#all this to say! just do your own research and take somewhat inflammatory comments on the internet with a grain of salt#also just to make it clear im not making any sweeping statements on khao kheow or the treatment of moo deng im just summarizing what i foun#based on what's being said in the most popular post on the subject ive seen.#for the potential like three people who will read all this hi :) hope ur having a nice day
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hrrr I Saw the TV Glow is still rolling around in the back of my mind. it's hitting me somewhat belatedly that what seemingly starts as mainly an identity story turns out - toward the final act - to also be a love story. two queer kids finding each other (again). the bond they forge (have always had). the feelings that start to grow (were always there) despite the lie they're living. one trying to save the other, and failing. the frail hope at the end that maybe what they had mattered after all, even if they never see each other again. maybe because they knew each other, someday things will be better.
idk. so much of the story feels so lonely. they're awkward with each other at first and they don't really "get" each other and they're absent from each other's lives for long periods and they don't have anyone else. but it's all a lie - they were best friends, they knew each other better than anyone, they are who they are because they knew each other, they were not alone. no matter how bleak the setting is, this fake world can't obscure the truth. they'll never forget each other. it will always have happened, it will always have mattered.
it's so hard to put into words but Owen/Isabel and Maddy/Tara make me so crazy, the way everything in the world works to drive them apart and yet not even losing their memories can destroy the connection between them. and it's not enough to prevent the world from tearing them apart but maybe it's enough to save their lives
queer love portrayed not as supernaturally resilient or invincible (god knows it isn't), but as a precious fragile thing that can and will grow back over and over in some form no matter what ...
#deerchatter#i saw the tv glow#i saw the tv glow spoilers#to be 100% clear i definitely believe they were specifically IN love on top of also being best friends. and the distinction is important#owen growing feelings for maddy is implicitly tied to her beginning to find herself as a trans lesbian#maddy growing feelings for owen is implicitly tied to her remembering their true lives as isabel and tara#it's so subtle because there's no space for that love in the midnight realm. and yet it grows back against all odds#there's very interesting potential for an isttg/rgu contrast-comparison analysis right down to the coffin/grave symbolism#the main duo's love being suppressed by a reality that can't bear it or contain it. the way it resurrects as self-love/renewed determinatio#if we're getting really crazy there are also parallels between maddy coming back for owen and certain interpretations of AoU#but while utena and anthy are implied to find each other in every incarnation owen and maddy's fate is a lot more open-ended#owen says she never saw maddy again but the truthfulness of the narrated parts of the story are highly questionable so ???#augh. so many thoughts.#sorry if some of this seems completely off i only watched it once late at night. gonna rewatch in the upcoming days
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tease tidbit tuesday <3
i was tagged by @callmenewbie, @wildlife4life, @try-set-me-on-fire, @disasterbuckdiaz, @rogerzsteven, @hippolotamus, @giddyupbuck, @ladydorian05, @daffi-990, @jesuisici33, @loserdiaz, and @wikiangela mwah 🫶🏼
have a long tease from hoa eddie, where eddie's grossly in love with buck's big tits and honestly i can't blame him
Eddie sighs, turns around, and nearly runs right into Buck’s big, naked, hairy chest.�� “Eddie—” “Where’s your shirt?” Buck blinks. “I was mowing the yard and I got hot,” he replies, shrugging sheepishly. He wants to bitch at Buck for mowing the yard, for taking his shirt off and getting grass all over himself, for inadvertently causing a scene because his big fat bleeding heart always seems to get him in trouble, but it’s Buck, sweet and stubborn and soft Buck, and he’s standing in front of Eddie, bare-chested and sweaty and a little breathless with blue eyes so large and wide and childlike, expecting Eddie to be upset when he’s not, not in the slightest, and all Eddie can do is smile and undo the snaps on his button down when he realizes Buck’s shivering, cold and clammy now that the sun has set. He has another shirt beneath, anyway. “Grass is worse than sand, Buck,” he says, handing his shirt over. “Put this on. You’ll want to shower as soon as you can, so just stay the night again. I’ve got a load of your clothes in the dyer.” Buck does as he’s told, pulling on the button down. It’s a size too small, dragging across his broad shoulders and barreled chest; the buttons stretch open over his torso, giving Eddie a peak of the curly hair between his tits, and his nipples are hard, tiny nubs beneath the fabric that draw Eddie’s attention, and he licks his lips. He’s seen Buck shirtless a hundred times before, sure, but he never realized how huge Buck’s tits really were until now, so big beneath his shirt they stick out like actual boobs. He wonders how heavy they’d feel in his hands, if Buck would make pretty sounds when he squeezed the fat or pinched his nipples till they’re red and swollen. Huh. That’s new.
gonna no pressure tag @honestlydarkprincess, @eddiediaztho, @eddiebabygirldiaz, @eowon, @watchyourbuck, @exhuastedpigeon, @thewolvesof1998, @shitouttabuck, @housewifebuck, and whoever else mwah mwah
#eddie's losing his mind because on one hand buck looks so good with his shirt off#and on another hand bUCKS SHIRT IS OFF WHEN HE'S MOWING? GOD#and growing up in texas eddie knows#he knows okay#that grass is worse than sand#he's spent many a day hauling hay and by god he had days of picking grass out of every crevice of his body and he knows buck's#gonna bitch about it for a week at least#but god. buck's tits. buck's tits? when did they get so big. when did they get so hairy. and his NIPPLES. that's eddie's favorite color#they match the color of his birthmark so of course they have to match the color of his cock too right#right?#that's how science works right?#eddie passed science with a b- but hey he remembers the scientific method#ask questions and hypothesize and then test it out right#it's okay he doesn't mind to redo the experiment#anyway i finished chapter 2 FINALLY and am gonna start on chapter 3 today after a lil snack break teehee#tag games
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teehee
Happy birthday @shinechermont !
Here our girls hanging out because I thought it'd be fun uwu
Rose
thanks @ari-cuno for organizing that collab gift thingie!!!
#me doing artz#Vivid#Rose#aftermare shipkid#hey sweetie may your day be great#awesome even#I'm so proud of you#it's an honor to watch you grow#(and you will still grow regardless of what the law says ;3)#love you lots#you have a beautiful soul#can't believe the itty bitty baby I met years ago is leaving the kiddy room#aw my sappy sap isn't enough to my liking#oh I know#I think I said that often enough but never enough#you improved so much art-wise like it's crazy#don't get me wrong I still like your old stuff#but every once in a while I see an art of you on my dash and I take a second to think that wow#crazy it's the same person#I AM PICKING YOU UP AND SPINNING YOU#WE'RE DOING SPINNY#SPIN SPIN#you have no choice on the question#my arms are picking you up and you can't escape#that gif is sooooo rough but I felt I might get a bit shouted at for being unreasonable since I started this wednesday and believe me it wa#so tempting to go full on render and all but honestly I wouldn't have slept for several days and I thought you might hit me or something if#I pulled that again X'Dc#tho it was fun to allow myself to go rough and wing it so enjoy the ugly hug it was made with the heart#gift for AC
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Do you guys think I could sell a pair of patched handspun handknit wool socks to a museum as folk art if I prettied em up a little
#genuine question#i think i might be able to get away with it#also these ones grow a new hole or two every time i wear them so i wouldnt be giving up much#hm...#could embroider a few things patch up the holes and call it a day#the form doesnt open for a month anyway tbf
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Bought one of my lil nephew giannis shoes for his birthday bcs he loves giannis and these are some of the ugliest fucking things I have ever laid my eyes on in my life. anyways it's his bday today so i gave them to him. but they are so ugly. he loves them
#i am not a sneakerhead#i wish i could be . finacially i can be. but mentally i cannot#i am not a car guy either. i could. but i cant mentally#bcs the only time id get smthing pretty is to look at it. and keep it safe#and then id want to km$ for not using smthing thats intended to be used bcs i hate wasted potential#once i got these rlly nice shoes#ive worn them once when i was trying them on#and i hate myself every day for doing that but also i just cant get them dirty#BUT I HATE THAT#some ppl can do that. they get a million things and only use it once and yea i COULD but psychologically i just CANT#im friends with a lot of sneakerheads and chain wearers and while i cant mentally make myself one#i can understand why they can#like ppl always wanna excuse not helping ppl by pointing at the stuff they already have#like oh u can buy urself a chain but cant buy ur momma and u a nicer place to live#like ok so credit scores are not existent then. especially when ppl use that phrase against ppl growing into crime like#yes they are making money now but is it good clean money? no. thats not gonna go into smthing long term n hefty like a house#chains are a rlly big thing bcs sometimes some jewelers just dont ask questions. hence bmf's jeweler getting roped into their crime schemes#any business can be like that btw. like michael jacksons doctor getting paid to kill him. the difficulty lvl just changes#and also. random ppl make fun of the stuff they can see or hear right in front of them#random ppl can and will make u feel bad abt any little thing they know or see the best bcs theyre assholes like that#u wear shoes all the time everywhere. thats more and more eyes noticing how old/dirty ur shoes are#or ur cars old n busted or ur phones a fucking android like it doesnt matter. the more ppl can see. the more theyll know#the more sensitive u get abt whats actually small to u at the start but big 2 them n then it gets big 2 u#anyways yea so like. i get it. i dont do it but i can see why others do#anyways yea these shoes are so ugly lol like i dont buy merch of my favs unless the style matches mine personally#he just liked them bcs they were giannis tbh n then i pointed out they were modeled after 1 of the jerseys#which made he rlly want them a while back so i surprised him today#but yea these things are ugly lol im glad he likes them but ew LMFAO
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i am very grateful that im not someone that has to deal with daily seizures but it is evil when it takes like a week and a half's worth of business days to recover from a seizure
#if i had them everyday or every other day i would be so fucked 😭#id like to say they dont bother me per se but the entire week after is laying in bed after 11 pm and wondering if jts going to happen again#bc my head feels like its about to explode#and then do not get me started on the fear of getting in the shower within the first few days of one happening .#reasonably i understand that my seizures happen from 11pm to maybe 3 am on average .#but ill have a seizure and then have to hype myself up for like 2 hours just to take one 3 days later st like 2 pm#my seizures do not interfere with my day to day life in extreme ways but existing knowing that i have them during a certain time frame is#like. Hey man can you grow up#also it is really funny being told theyre probably hormonal or stress related and should 'probably stop' as i get into my mid 20s .#Well im turning 25 next month and evidently i still have seizure activity in me#also also heres a fun fact: my epilepsy does not have an actual named diagnosis they just said i certainly have a Form of it ❤️#they dont know what causes them and i have no real warning signs (bc a headache =/= potential seizure)#they dont bother me but i do have to live with the knowledge that i could have one any day now and wake up to my mom asking me questions#hope everyone can tell i have a lot of feelings about my epilepsy despite not talking about it like ever ❤️#the only thing that really bothers me is the no warning signs. ive been perfectly fine and had them. ive had massive migraines when i was#unmedicated and didnt have one. very bizarre#and ofc all my brain scans come back normal all the time so they dgaf Lol
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.
#psyching myself up to try and watch the new series of heartstopper#I don't make a lot of personal posts these days and it feels easier to talk about this in the tags for some reason now - like I'm whisperin#but series 2 absolutely wrecked me in a way that is not entirely healthy#isaac's storyline is just a bit too close to home for me and I became a bawling mess every single time he was on screen#and not in a cathartic way. in a like I am dredging up the trauma of growing up aroace without having fully come to terms with it yet way.#I've come such a long way with slowly starting to feel pride in being aroace even in just the last few months#that I wondered if I'd actually be fine with it this time. I even considered rewatching s2 in preparation. turns out I'm not fine.#I watched a recap of s2 to try and remember what happened and uhhhh that clip of isaac rejecting that love interest in the bookshop#(with the novel loveless blurry in the background) has already brought up emotions.#then I thought I'd scroll some spoilers in his character tag just to prepare myself for what would happen with him this season#and just reading posts (mild spoilers here) about him being proudly aroace have sent me into paroxysms of sobbing yet again so....#I've honestly come such a long way in the last few years and the last few months. I'm even talking about it on tumblr now.#but I guess most of my work on that front has been accepting the present and the future of not having or wanting a partner.#whereas there's still a lifetime of trauma from the way it made me feel in the past#both growing up feeling alienated and having no idea what was different about me and the extent to which I tried to make it not be true#for years after first having an inkling of it being a possibility. I would have done anything to make myself alloromantic.#(the realisation of asexuality came later and was more of a 'huh I guess that makes sense' thing lol)#and even though I no longer want to change this fact about who I am#I guess I'm more traumatised by it all than I consciously realised. genuinely thought I'd be fine at this point.#anyway ramble over. I'm actually not sure if I should watch the new season or not. will it be helpful to work through the emotions?#or just re-traumatise me? felt more like the latter last time so hmmm.#guess I'm going to have to think about it.#it feels ridiculous that such a fluffy show - in which the character in question is pretty minor - should provoke such a reaction#but there you go#mine#tag chat#personal
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Okay but like, what if I was bigger? What if I was twice as big?
#esmes lood writings#questions I ask literally every day and will continue asking no matter how much I grow
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Thinking about the gay Mormon kid I met in middle school and how all the other Mormons were convinced he was gay-faking and actually straight
#mormon children are so funny they be like ''if someone hears me say fuck i could be disowned and excommunicated. i support u being gay tho#i'll always support you the way you are'' <- actual unironic convos i had with my mormon friend in 5th grade#like days apart first she was like i can never swear and then when i came out to my class as bi#she was the Nicest straight person about it like of course the other girls who were questioning or already knew were supportive#straight kids had a more diverse opinion on it lol but this mormon girl got me she was so good#definitely part of my gay awakening bc i spent months being like ''i cant be bi bc if i was i would have a crush on Her. but i dont''#''i only feel this way bc she has beautiful red hair and freckles which i adore and she is super sweet to me. thats not gay''#and this went on for 3 months and then i had a wet dream about a different girl and i was like OH. well the evidence is growing#wow these tags have nothing to do with this gay mormon kid lololol nothing much to say about him#i didnt know him very well tbh like we spoke a little bit and he did come out to me but most of what i learned about him was rumors#and def i feel like he got the typical gay kid treatment of being ostracized lied about and picked on#idk why you would choose to subject urself to that if u arent ssa like it is not easy to be out in this area#its maybe not Dangerous bc more people are coming out every year but its certainly still viewed as a severe sin#its not seen as a neutral thing by mosr churches although several churches have sprung up that specifically welcome and accept lgbt people#thats a super interesting divide to me bc i Still meet christians who cant even hear about gay people without talking#about how sad gayness is and how gay souls are in danger and the last time i ever visited a church the sermon was homophobic#yet the city decorates for pride every year and even certain churches will decorate for it#the culture is certainly changing lolol but as long as there are ''gay love is sodomy'' christians around here#then its always going to be a struggle for lgb youth bc they are straight up hostile
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i missed that class what dont you like about starlins rendition of their relationship?
(and also like, DID you think he did something in particular well or was it all…meh
the crux of my issues in this regard stems from batman #416. in the post-crisis era you began to see this way more lopsided depiction of bruce and dick's relationship wherein the former was portrayed to be almost.. bitter that dick had moved on to establish his own life. and it stood in great, great contrast to the bruce of the pre-crisis era, who was certainly devastated at the realization that dick was growing up, but also very intent for him to find his own happiness and way in life. they would have their disagreements on occasion (e.g., bruce initially disapproving of dick dropping out of college, bruce immediately taking leadership of a situation where the titans were involved when dick was better equipped to handle it, etc.) but the outcome of those situations was never outright bad yknow. bruce was very much capable of recognizing where he might have overstepped and subsequently stepped back to let dick have his own space. and i think initially max allan collins expanded on that dynamic in the post-crisis era in interesting ways by juxtaposing bruce's desire to see dick flourish against his own constant fear for dick's life. so instead of mike w. barr's comedic and lighthearted backup stories in early 80s tec where bruce disguised himself to keep an eye on dick's shenanigans and assure himself everything was going alright, you got this more serious confrontation within bruce with regards to his position as a parent. i don't think a lot of people read it that deeply but i've always viewed batman #408 as one of the most sensible depictions of that dilemma. the general complaints tend to be that this issue robbed dick of his pre-crisis decision to retire robin on his own, and i'll concede that as a worthwhile concern. but i don't think it's esp damning what with the implication that bruce no longer wants to be the person indirectly making the decision for dick to continue to be in this line of work. their moment at dick's bedside is less about bruce robbing him of the decision and more about him saying, if i let you still be robin, that's a direct reflection on me, bc i'm the one who got you to do all of this originally. i'm the one who put you directly in harm's way. if you're going to do this from now on, you need to do it on your own terms. you need to decide for yourself that this is who you want to be, without your relationship with me even being a factor.
it's a moment contributive to that delicious dynamic between them wherein every decision bruce takes to service dick's agency is inevitably read the wrong way by the latter to imply that he's not valued or not worthy of being seen as bruce's equal (and before the hounds pounce on me this obv does not include the increasingly abusive depiction of their relationship as the 90s progressed). that is an unavoidable dilemma when you're simultaneously someone's ward/adopted son and also their partner-in-crime! dick wants to be bruce's son and to be entitled to all of the love and care and protection that that entails but he also wants to be bruce's brother, his equal, his confidante, the one person he trusts more than anyone else in the world, etc. it's a tough place to be! it is paradoxical! and i'm so, so open to seeing that explored and think the way collins attempted to approach it in #408 was marvelous. but the way starlin (and other writers as well) totally swerved right in #416 to create this sudden resentment in bruce that dick had grown out of needing him was.. so utterly bizarre. like completely out of left field in a way i don't understand why people don't question it anymore bc in light of everything in the immediate fifteen years prior to the crisis it makes so little sense. their relationship with each other was so valued, bruce was so anxious to see dick establish himself while nonetheless maintaining a protectiveness over him, but it was all very much in good will even if he could overstep on occasion. it had all of the potential to allow for a very nuanced, empathetic exploration into the dilemmas of parenthood and esp when you are someone like bruce who has to forever live and contend with the crime of taking kids with him out onto the streets. bc he has to feel guilty! there is no escaping it. this is history, done and dusted forever, can't go back in time, so on and so forth. whatever harm comes any robin's way he has to live with as in some part being traceable back to his own actions. and i frankly believe that would be far more likely to evoke grief and anxiousness and concern than it would be bitterness that his son is charting out his own life
#as to do i think starlin did anything well. hmm#i like that he was able to acknowledge that jason's parents were loving people despite their circumstances#it didn't matter that willis was a criminal. what mattered was that he loved his family and would've done anything for them#which was a rare concession from starlin bc his writing could be pretty classist elsewhere#but at the same time idk sometimes i read it back and it's like. i don't think he was actually as classist as winick was ultimately#like it's been a While since i reread the starlin issues#but you could tell he believed jason's demise was less about his social class and more about being unable to fully recover from#or process his trauma as a result of the life he'd lived and the things he'd experience. hence the garzonas saga#and even in a death in the family the question is never about whether jason is acting out bc he's criminally inclined#bruce explicitly says he doesn't think he's given jason enough time to mentally and emotionally recover and that's why#he suspends him. so even starlin knew it was about the trauma first and foremost#and i mean that somewhat goes in line with his reasons for wanting to kill robin to begin with#he thought robin was symbolically representative of child abuse#in that it wasn't the conduit through which a young boy should necessarily grow#and ideally? the way to explore that in a medium that Requires the existence of child vigilantes#would have been to make the distinction that while there is always going to be some danger to every robin at the end of the day#what made the danger to jason distinct was that robin didn't work to resolve His trauma specifically#what robin did for dick is never something it could have done for jason let alone tim. there were too many other factors at play#so if this dilemma had been approached that way rather than starlin pursuing a blanket robin is child abuse ideology#that was subsequently picked up by other writers. then i think we might have gotten somewhere quite interesting#but anyway yeah so he's not my most hated by any means. there are parts i love there are parts i hate#ultimately at the end of the day winick will always be a gazillion times worse#outbox
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