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luridon · 4 months ago

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Heartrot

What's important is that you live.

♡characters: yandere!immortal x shipoftheseus!reader (Yep. I guess we're going with that desc)

♡warnings: MINORS DNI, obsession, body horror, implied murder, psychological horror, MINORS DNI

♡notes: I sure hope this one is searchable because the last one with a merman was not. Also. This is also less of a story and more of a horrible thought experiment. Go read Dear My Living Dead by Aidalro

♡w/c: 900+ | ♡masterlist♡

How terrible it is for an immortal to fall in love with a mortal. Whether the long-lived is a deity or merely someone very powerful, whether this invincibility is brought about by arcane magic or advanced sciences, it must be very lonely. For such an individual, falling in love with someone mortal has to simply be the worst thing possible.

Would it be worse to have a devoted love since the start of such a long, dreary life, or to have your world warmed and brightened after ages of cold lonesomeness only to lose that light?

Of course there would be joy. There would be true happiness and blissful comfort and affection- but only at first. There would always be dread, and as time crawls by and one's beloved simply can't be granted the accursed blessing that will stretch the immortal's lifespan misesrably, uncomprehendingly long after their dearest one's. . .creativity will be required.

Keeping you alive is paramount. That means you can't simply be put to sleep and preserved- that's a corpse, not a life, not a love.

The human body is merely a mass of moving parts. It is a machine that runs on blood and nutrients, its mechanisms formed of flesh all pumping and beating and shifting to the rhythm that is you.

If a part breaks, then replace it.

The world is full of people. It's no trouble to take their parts to fix yours. Whether with science so strange it seems like magic, or magic so complex and specific it is its own rigid discipline, such an act must be possible. Alchemy or art, research or ritual, it will be done. It must be done.

You will be soothed if it hurts. You'll be cared for until the aftermath settles down. You may disagree with the method, but all that matters is that you live beside them still. It would be best if you don't know the source of your extended life. A mortal mind can only handle so much. If the truth will trouble you so, it would be best if you know nothing at all.

Only know them as someone you love. Only know that you are loved. You can live blissfully, if ignorantly, by their side, and they will be able to live well too. If something is amiss, simply say so. If something hurts, it will be remedied at once. Whatever you need, whatever breaks, it can be fixed, and you won't have to remember that you were ever pained at all.

Still, you must think that something is wrong, sometimes. That your arms do not feel like your own, that your very skin is wrong. You'll see phantoms in the mirror somedays, and flinch at the sound of your own voice when you hear it in the quiet.

An immortal may be a wanderer. An immortal may just as well as have gained the means over the years to have a place grand enough to entertain and secluded enough to be safe. Some days, you'll need more rest. Some years, you may simply live in your home, and forget you had ever known the world beyond the building, just as you so easily forget that you do have a rooted home somewhere until you two return to the abode.

Your love would be glad either way, being within or beyond the walls secondary to your comfort, but sometimes you may indulge his worry and rest. And some days you will explore and remember all the trinkets and baubles. And some nights you may join your beloved a dance you have not done in years, or simply listen to him tell stories that have slipped from your terribly forgetful mind.

Sometimes, you will find your love looking at you, and you will wonder if there was always such a dreadful fear in them when you only stumbled a little or let a cup slip from your hands.

Sometimes, you will wake up, and be asked to move your leg, your arm, to breathe, to swallow, to do all matter of odd, simple things, and you no longer forget these strange dreams by dawn, after seeing them so much.

Sometimes, you will wander the halls, and feel even less like yourself. Your heart will ache as you traverse the corridors that seem darker, stranger, more abandoned, and you will find a room so terribly familiar.

And you will open the ancient door, and you will break.

Because within lies yourself.

Your hair, your eyes, your limbs, your body, your face- every inch of skin and hair and offal something that is undeniably yours in a way your body simply is not. You stare upon yourself in too many pieces to comprehend, and every part of you between that first vessel and the current is scattered just as dizzyingly.

Those times are always so unfortunate, but your love doesn't have the heart to lock up or throw away anything that's ever been yours. Every part is nothing but a remnant, an old ragged fragment that used to hold you, but they were you once. You are loved so dearly it would pain the soul to part with even these scraps, and so they are preserved. It's a horribly, bloody sight, such a cemetery of you, and it aches when you hear it is all out of love.

(It will ache because you still love too, and there isn't a lie in the horrible, loving words.)

You may very well fall there. You may run away. But you will break, sooner or later, and you will be found.

You will be fixed. All that troubles you will be stripped away and your form will be settled anew.

You will wake and know you are loved, and you will love as you always have, and always will, because no matter how much you are changed, your heart is the one thing that could never be replaced.

#yandere x reader #yandere x you #yandere x darling #yandere oc #oc x reader #soft yandere #gore #body horror #dysmorphia #the things that happen the misfortune of being a mortal #yandere imagines #yandere scenarios #immortal yandere #yandere drabblw #yandere concept

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nightmarefuele · 8 months ago

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muse directory.

repression is a huge theme on this blog. smut happens (usually in body horror font), but don't expect it.

Dune, Star Wars, general gritty sci-fi;

Qimir | The Stranger; manny jacinto ; might feature a knight verse in addition to some canon na-Baron Feyd-Rautha ; austin butler ; draws 98% from the '24 film. Verosha Aniseya ; amandla stenberg Ren (of 'the' Ren) ; adam driver ; a heavily divergent/'oc-ified', post(usually)-snoke, visceral horror, gritty lean from star wars' kylo ren. Shin Hati ; ivanna sakhno ; ahsoka. Kylo Ren ; adam driver ; as close to kylo 'canon' as i'm capable of writing, but solely draws from tfa characterization. Mae-ho Aniseya ; amandla stenberg Paul-Muad'Dib Atreides ; timothee chalamet ; leans on the book(+ messiah) from time to time. Lady Margot Fenring ; léa seydoux. Officer KD6-3.7 ; ryan gosling ; blade runner 2049 . Ezra ; pedro pascal ; prospect (2018). Cee ; sophie thatcher ; prospect (2018).

bg3;

Raphael ; andrew wincott Ketheric Thorm ; j.k. simmons Astarion ; neil newbon ; incredibly selective muse. no smut. primarily ascendant. Gale ; tim downie Shadowheart ; jennifer english Gortash ; jason isaacs

villains, antiheroes;

John Constantine ; keanu reeves Loki Laufeyson ; tom hiddleston ; selective muse. fuck u i don't consider post-tdw canon. ciao Jonathan Crane ; cillian murphy ; selective muse

bleak, flexible, modern;

Lisa Nova ; rosa salazar ; brand new cherry flavor. Connor, the Android sent by CyberLife ; bryan dechart Elijah Kamski ; d:bh ; neil newbon Hank Anderson ; d:bh ; clancy brown Sofia Falcone ; cristin milioti ; i'm in love with this crazy bitch Elliot Alderson ; rami malek ; mr. robot. Phillip Price ; michael cristofer ; mr. robot. Leon ; joey bada$$ ; mr. robot. Lisbeth Salander ; rooney mara ; the girl with the dragon tattoo (2011) . Berry Rydell ; young josh hartnett ; freelance private security officer from william gibson's virtual light trilogy, based in retrofuturist nocal and socal. just a guy doing his own thing and getting caught up, routinely, somehow, in the national (but very top-secret) dickfight over some expensive glasses. + virtual reality, or whatever. Control (John Rodriguez) ; bob morley ; based on authority by jeff vandermeer, and annihilation, book and film, exploring hypnosis/mind control and consequent distrust, or outright paranoia. operates at the branch-end of a highly bureaucratic and mysterious organization. eventually ends up at Southern Reach, "...a secret agency that manages expeditions into a place known as Area X, an uninhabited and abandoned coastal area of an unnamed country which nature is gradually reclaiming." 'nature', in this context, being a cute/tame word. refers to his guns as 'gramps', 'grandpa', 'grandpap', etc. 6" tall, impassive. Tangerine ; aaron taylor-johnson ; bullet train .

apocalypse;

Joel Miller ; pedro pascal Imperator Furiosa ; anya taylor-joy. (alyla browne.) Dr. Dementus ; chris hemsworth.

aus are fun. hit me with em or forever hold your peace.

ocs, always subject to adapt and update on a thread-to-thread basis;

Oeznik Ambroicz ; cillian murphy ; loosely based on a character from an original script. flexible iterations. director of an institute/facility (sometimes agency, depending on setting and historical values) that focuses on exploring the residual elements that paranormal trauma leaves behind. these elements can be purely psychological, physical, combined, or, sometimes, paranormal themselves. in other iterations, to draw further on lovecraftian or cthulhu mythos elements, oeznik may lean more private investigator, or 'freelance', for his own mysterious and often unexplained purposes. focused and preoccupied when fixed securely inside his element; wary and suspicious when not. Nadya ; sara serraiocco, sara montpetit ; lab experiment turned a) runaway, b) interdimensional spy/assassin, c) something something time shenanigans. or simple modern ones. who the fuck knows. Dorian Yu ; christian yu ; tba. loosely based on christian yu's musical creations. relies either on psychological themes (wherein dorian is bipolar), for stories more grounded in realism, or the supernatural. heavily flexible, works into most (if not all) modern environments. can be taken a vaguely sci-fi or heavily cyberpunk route. (he's fun. smiley ball of energy and sunshine, or depressive and vaguely antagonistic shut-in.) prone to delusions, dissociation, and in severe instances, amnesia. Fifine ; anya taylor-joy ; random modern verse shenanigans. (the) Insomnium ; tbd. ; developed and hatched by a cult of space witches moreso than born. derived from an organically inorganic (or just inexplicable) substance. for tumblr purposes, blends the idea of dune's 'voice'. cult functions similarly on some levels to the b.g., but is entirely an unknown. stems from the same gritty, visceral horror environment and themes as the ren. (especially picky about where i throw this one.) space cultists tba.

#.| muse directory.

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caradoulasupport · 9 months ago

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Matrescence - becoming a mother, no ‘bouncing back’ required

Becoming a mother for the first time is a great transition in your life, a rite-of-passage. And not only the first time, but for each time that you become a mother you transition again into a new version of yourself. Each transition is just as significant as the one before. In Western cultures, the focus is largely on the baby that has been born, however the mother is also born each time she gives birth, and this "becoming a mother" piece has largely been left out of our culture entirely. In the same way that we nurture and care for a new baby, we would really do well to remember that the new mother also needs to be nurtured and cared for during this transition.

This critical transition period is Matrescence, and was first coined by an American anthropologist in 1973, Dana Raphael. And although this was first written about in the 1970’s the concept of matrescence has gone completely unacknowledged and unexplored in the medical community, until very recently. There is still so little known about the psychological and physiological effects of becoming a mother - how it affects the brain, the endocrine system, cognition, immunity, the psyche, the microbiome, the sense of self. At a time when a woman is going through a significant rite of passage and is going through massive changes in her physical state, her status within her wider group, her emotional life, her focus, her own identity and in her relationships with everyone around her, she is expected to transition through this stage with ease.

As the author of the recently published book "Matrescence", Lucy Jones, has alluded to - each time that I write the word "matrescence" a red squiggly line immediately appears below it as if to say - this is not real, it doesn't mean anything, it's made up! But it is very real, and the only way to make it even more real is to bring more and more awareness to it, to speak about it to everyone you know. Maybe people will use the argument that they don't want to scare new mothers with horror stories, or that everyone has to go through it for themselves. But there is a huge difference between scaremongering a new mother and presenting her with a term and an explanation for how she is very likely feeling anyway. And if women were to even grow up hearing about this normal transition that happens on entering motherhood, have evidence based information on how it affects your thoughts and emotions, your hormones, your relationships, your sense of self - how much better would they go on to cope with the reality of motherhood if it happens for them? Instead of getting completely side-swiped by a wave of unknowing, of being lost and totally adrift in what we have come to understand as modern motherhood.

The sense of social isolation that can stem from women being ashamed of what they are experiencing and not realising it is actually normal can even trigger feelings of postnatal depression. There are such complicated feelings that can co-exist - having a sense of worry, disappointment, guilt, competition, frustration, anger or even fear alongside the joy of new motherhood. And it is now thought, according to reproductive psychiatrist Alexandra Sacks, who has reintroduced the concept of matrescence in a New York Times article in 2017, that just even knowing that and being aware of what matrescence is can prevent women from getting ill. If you can watch the TED talk given by Alexandra Sacks in 2018 describing matrescence, it will astonish you.

Talking about matrescence and all the parts of motherhood- including the parts that may carry shame for us - is the only way to help mothers feel less stigmatised and more normal in all aspects of becoming a mother. Of course experiencing matrescence without a support network, and without understanding the complexity of what is happening in your brain as a new mother only adds to feelings of not being enough, not being a “good” mother and a sense of failure that can lead to a diagnosis of postnatal depression.

But the question is how much of maternal mental illness is biological and how much is an understandable response to the design of modern parenthood?

One way to claim back the rite-of-passage of motherhood is to surrender to it, embrace every part of it and honour the transition that you have gone through as a mother and as parents. Planning for this postpartum period and putting the framework in place that allows you to be nurtured as the mother is fundamental to the process of matrescence. It is time to honour this monumental transition and enter into motherhood empowered, nurtured and with the confidence that the changes that are happening are normal and expected.

#matrescence #postpartum #new mum #doula #support #Youtube

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navarice · 2 years ago

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A Box of Pictures in Ma's Attic

//@desi-lgbt-fest // Day 18 Fest Submission

Sometimes when I look back at my childhood photos I wonder how such a sweet little girl could ever become someone like me. It’s not a feeling that’s purely negative, though. It’s just a thought. I see the little me holding dolls and hugging her family and then I wonder just when did I stop feeling the joy of existing and start worrying about the space I occupy in this world. Every person stands at their own crossroads, yet mine feels like standing right in the middle of a roundabout of identities. A Muslim girl that isn’t particularly devout, a Bengali who’s lived in America more than her own homeland, the eldest daughter that disappoints her family more than makes them proud, a fraud in her educational institution and workplace, a fat girl (really that’s just the reality of it), just a general person who is easier to let go of then to hold on to. Most importantly, however, a person who doesn’t understand all these identities she grapples with.

When I do ponder on this, I remember that little girl in the picture, so sweet and so innocent, somehow knew back then that something about her was different from what she has known her whole life so far. There was never a dawning horror or a sudden shift of the universe, but something more quiet and sure…almost as if it was just a truth born within her. Now, innate acceptance is different from the reality of seeing it. Truth be told, learning about the queer community at 11 years old was absolutely overwhelming. Queer culture in 2014 was far from the progressive as it is today, and the passing of the Marriage Equality Act began a sort of Rennaissance of new identities, definitions, and cultures. Yeah…quite overwhelming.

Eleven-year-old me didn’t know what to do with all of it. Neopronouns? Nonbinary? Genderqueer? Asexual? All I know is that I like to kiss girls sometimes. Maybe I liked boys too, but the more I get to know boys my age the less I like them to be honest. The more I learned new things, the more questions I had, and the more I felt like a failure because I didn’t understand it right away. The quiet acceptance was gone, instead replaced with new verbiage and cultural politics. Absurdly, I wondered if I was even doing this gay thing right. Should I be thinking about defying societal norms and change my pronouns? Should I hate sex? Love it? Should I discard my religion and Bengali identity because it is not as progressive and denies my existence? For the first time in my life, I began to question myself.

The best thing about being gay in the early 2010s is that you can shove yourself back in the closet as many times as you want since being open about it was so new. And that’s exactly what I did. Up until my senior year of high school, I didn’t bother thinking about any of it (other than consuming an insane amount of gay content because hey a girl’s gotta have an outlet somewhere). Perhaps it was a blessing rather than a curse that the pandemic made us experts in introspection because the next round of reformation felt akin to psychological warfare on my younger self.

I look at the younger photo of me and I look at the me right now and wonder how, after all that, I still come back to a full circle to the place I once was: quiet and innate acceptance. I am not out to my family (I tried with my mom but that was a complete disaster). It doesn’t really mix well with me being Muslim-Bengali. However, I am out to myself. In other words, I gave up caring about definitions and what should or should not be, instead focusing on the painful, joyful, simple existence I lead, making a difference when I can wherever I can. I am still on that roundabout of identities, continuously faced with unprecedented uncertainties, but now, I take that little girl’s hand, and we face the future forward together.

#I DID IT Y'ALL #I'VE BEEN SO SWAMPED W STUFF THAT I'VE ONLY DONE TWO SUBMISSIONS NOOO #but honestly this was a really good prompt #i just wish i could write something better than what is essentially a diary entry #but eh it is what it is #desi lgbt fest 2023 #hope this resonates w at least one person so I feel validated tehee

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dumbass-tumbler-cryptid · 2 years ago

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4, 12, 13, 40 💞

💞💞💞

4) What is your favourite genre to write for?

I do really enjoy my psychological horror ala Cabin in the woods but I also enjoy writing family fluff and slice of life

12) Who is your favourite character to write for? Why?

Writing Paz is definitely my favourite. IRL I'm a 26 year old female and a fire sign so writing a feisty late twenties early thirties lady is just pretty easy for me and since she only appeared in like three panels of the comic with zero speaking lines she's pretty much a blank slate that I can do whatever I want with whereas when I'm writing Quaritch and Spider they have known personalities that I want to follow.

13) Who is your least favourite character to write for? Why?

So it's not that I don't enjoy writing Spider because I definitely do, he can just be kinda hard for me to write for sometimes. I always have to remind myself that I'm writing a sixteen year old so I'm not making him do things more in line with a 10-12 year old. This is definitely a big struggle for me when writing Mama's Boy because that's canon Spider, whereas I feel like I have a little more leeway writing Cabin in the Woods Spider because since he wasn't raised on an alien planet and because the circumstances I put him through in that fic are just so different to anything he goes through in canon, I feel like that changes him in ways that just wouldn't happen in canon.

40) Do people know you write fanfiction?

Yes but only two people, my roommate, who is also my best friend, being one of them. We saw Avatar three times in theaters together and while she's not as obsessed with it as I am, she is extremally supportive of my writing, loves to here me talk about it and is really happy to see me so excited about it.

This has actually been my first time ever writing fanfiction because in the past I've been too embarrassed to do so just because of the stigma surrounding fanfiction writers. I was watching so many other writers on here receive so much support and love and I was sending anonyms asks to other writers that actually started getting traction like this that I sent to @hyperfixatedfandomer months ago. Watching that concept grow was really big for me and I started building the confidence I needed to actually write my ideas but my roommate is the one that gave me that final push I needed to finally start writing and it's honestly been so good for me.

Not to get too personal or overemotional here but I've actually been going through a lot of really hard stuff this year. Like I actually just came out of a massive depressive episode where I didn't quite want to die but I did want to flip the table on my life so to speak and just runaway from it. Writing my fics and seeing peoples reactions to them was really the only thing that brought me joy during that time so from the bottom of my heart thank you all so much for your support. It has truly meant the world to me. 💙

That all got so much more emotional then I anticipated but that's on me for answering these at 2am lol.

#ask game #this was so much fun

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yutamahidayati · 1 year ago

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Night Has Come Episode 7 - 8 ENG SUB

Attention all drama enthusiasts! Brace yourselves as the much-anticipated Night Has Come Episode 7 - 8 with English subtitles has been unleashed into the streaming sphere. In here, we take pride in being the trailblazers, delivering the freshest episodes straight to your screens. This latest installment is ripe with intrigue, emotion, and unmissable plot twists. Make sure to bookmark our platform for instant access to all the newest episodes, and stay tuned via our Facebook page for real-time updates on your favorite dramas. Indulge in this engrossing episode and immerse yourself in the captivating world of drama. Don't miss out – it's time to delve into the magic of Night Has Come Episode 7 - 8!

Night Has Come Episode 7 - 8

Watch on Website : Watch Night Has Come Episode 7 - 8 Eng Sub Full Episode (Free) Watch on FB Groups : fb.com/groups/englishsubsasiandramaclub (Join) Watch on Telegram : @englishsubsasiandramaclub (Join)

Details Drama: Night Has Come Country: South Korea Episodes: 12 Aired: Dec 4, 2023 - Dec 18, 2023 Aired On: Monday Original Network: Viki Duration: 35 min. Content Rating: 18+ Restricted (violence & profanity) Night Has Come: Native Title: 밤이 되었습니다 Also Known As: Night Has Fallen , It's Night , Bami Doeeossseumnida Director: Im Dae Woong Genres: Thriller, Mystery, Horror, Youth Tags: Student Supporting Character, Student Female Lead, Student Male Lead, School Setting, Outsider Female Lead, Classmates' Relationship, Teenager Supporting Character, Teenager Female Lead, Teenager Male Lead, Multiple Mains Statistics: Score: 8.0 (scored by 445 users) Ranked: #2401 Popularity: #2156 Watchers: 6,280 Night Has Come Episode 7 - 8 Eng Sub (Full Episode) Night Has Come also know as Night Has Fallen , It's Night , Bami Doeeossseumnida, 밤이 되었습니다 the third installment of the renowned drama series, Night Has Come unfolds with an amalgamation of wit, humor, and emotional depth. As the story continues, viewers are drawn deeper into the lives of its vibrant characters, experiencing a roller-coaster of laughter and heartfelt moments. Set against the backdrop of A mystery teen drama that takes place when a class of second-year high school students is suddenly forced to play mafia games in real life during their retreat. The drama will draw out the intense psychological warfare between the students as they go into survival mode. Students in the 2nd grade 3 class at Yooil High School go on a field trip. There they are forced to participate in a mafia game of death, and they struggle to survive. Lee Yoon Seo has excellent observation and reasoning abilities, which she uses to try to escape. Kim Jun Hee is the class president with a strong sense of justice and responsibility. Oh Jung Won ranks first at school academically, but she is an outcast and a loner. To survive, she must work with the other students., Episode 7 - 8 brings to the forefront the complexities and bonds between the central characters. The episode weaves a narrative that effortlessly oscillates between comedic interludes and touching revelations. Episode 7 - 8 , the characters who are full of charm and uniqueness are each involved in unexpected situations. Funny conflicts and hilarious moments present a series of scenes that invite laughter while conveying touching messages. This episode not only displays fresh humor, but also displays interesting character development. From light scenes to emotional moments, every aspect of this story is designed to appeal to the audience. The actors in the Night Has Come series deliver extraordinary performances, making every scene full of warmth and undeniable quality. While inserting a deep moral message, this series succeeds in expressing joy, silliness and immersive emotional depth. With a smart and interesting point of view, Episode 7 - 8 of the Night Has Come drama series promises exciting entertainment for loyal fans and viewers who have just joined this exciting adventure. From the cuteness to the depth of the story, every moment in this episode encapsulates the essence of what makes the Night Has Come drama series so interesting. Certainly, every viewer will be carried away by the storyline which is full of joy and warmth, making this episode an unforgettable experience. The production values are commendable, as evidenced by the smooth cinematography that is able to capture the essence of every scene produced by Viki and the cast Lee Jae In, Kim Woo Seok, Choi Ye Bin, Cha Woo Min, Ahn Ji Ho, Jung So Ri. Overall, Episode 7 - 8 of Night Has Come encapsulates the series' signature blend of humor and depth. It not only entertains but also resonates emotionally, leaving a lasting impact on the audience. As the narrative progresses, viewers eagerly anticipate the subsequent episodes to witness the further evolution of the storyline and characters.

#Night Has Come Episode 7 - 8 English Sub #Night Has Come Episode 7 - 8 Sub Indo #Night Has Come Episode 7 - 8 Subtítulos en Español

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antiibow-a · 1 year ago

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Sheva Alomar

Completion of Chapter 3-2

APPEARS IN:

Resident Evil 5

Location:

It will appear in the library upon the completing Chapter 3-2.

Transcript:

Listed within this file is a general background information overview of BSAA agent - Sheva Alomar - as pieced together from various sources. The information listed here is neither complete nor should it be used as a psychological analysis of the subject.

Sheva Alomar was born into an impoverished family situation in a small factory town situated in Africa. This particular town being home to Umbrella Plant 57.

As with most factory towns, the plant was the lifeblood of the town, bringing in much needed revenue and steady employment for its populous. Almost 80 percent of the town's adult population was employed at the factory in some facility, including Sheva's parents. While pay was low by most nation's standards, it provided a steady income for the townspeople and a happy childhood for Sheva.

This happiness was short-lived however.

While only eight years old, Sheva's peaceful life was brought to an abrupt end by the sound of sirens erupting from the factory.

As the sirens pierced the air, an ominous plume of black smoke poured out of the factory.

Even as a child, Sheva knew something was terribly wrong. With dread in her heart she ran toward the factory.

Arriving at the factory, she soon discovered the entrance blocked.

In place of the kind old man who used to stand guard at the entrance, strange adults in protective suits were everywhere. Their faces hidden by masks. Sheva could not understand what was happening.

"I realized years later that they were wearing anti- biohazard protective gear. They were part of Umbrella's Special forces."

She may have not understood the muffled voices emanating from beneath those masks at the time, but the assault rifles they leveled at her more than made their intentions understood. The country was not a very stable place to begin with, and near her town resided members of a large anti-government guerilla army. Although only a child, Sheva knew all too well the violence that often accompanied those with guns.

The adults in the village that remained were promptly executed by these gunmen.

Sheva was spared this same fate thanks to the vigilance of a neighbor who was able to get her back to her parent's home unnoticed.

Thus began the longest night of Sheva's life. Crippled by fear, she could only wait and pray for her parents' return. The night passed, and a new day dawned, but still, they did not return.

As night on another day fell she sensed a presence outside her home. Unable to contain her relief and joy, she ran to the door to greet her parents.

As she swung the door open, crying aloud with joy, she was soon met with disappointment and confusion.

For at the door, were not her parents rushing to embrace her, but her uncle, with a look of shock and horror painted upon his face. His words crushed any hope she had left…

"Your parents are dead. There was an accident at the factory."

Taking anything of value left in the house, her uncle then took Sheva to live with his family. Taking her away from the only home she had ever known.

Her life with her uncle would be brief.

Not only was her uncle's family extremely poor, but he also had seven children of his own to care for. Even thought Sheva was a blood relative, he probably never would have come for her if he hadn't thought he would receive financial compensation from the factory.

That compensation never came. Umbrella never gave out any payments. And soon, her aunt and uncle were unable to feed her.

Life was hell for Sheva, not only was she on the verge of starvation, she yearned to be with her parents again. In her grief, she became fixated on the notion that they were still alive.

As the days passed, this belief grew so strong to the point where she could think of nothing else. She knew she had to find them.

So one night as the moon bathed the savanna in silver, Sheva ran away from her uncle's house and headed back to her hometown and the life that was stolen from her.

The thought of her parents drove her on.

But the expansive savanna is a harsh environment for one so young and small. During her second night, she began to feel the effects of malnutrition. Unable to find food, Sheva soon collapsed.

A night in the savanna is not a quiet affair. The sounds of animals plodding along, beasts howling at the moon, insects chirping and buzzing about, and the dry wind soughing through the grass. Sheva considered them all with wonder. She had grown up in a town and was unaccustomed to her new surroundings.

Through the cacophony of strange noises, Sheva picked up a sound that was quite familiar to her. She heard the low rumbling of an engine and the sound of tires cracking over the dirt.

A truck pulled up next to Sheva and a stranger got out of the passenger side and spoke to her. If she replied to him or not, she couldn't recall, but the man picked her up and placed her in the bed of the truck.

The man that found Sheva was an anti-government guerrilla fighter. He provided her with food, shelter, and a place to call home. Unfortunately for Sheva, this good turn was accompanied by some bad news.

She was told that the incident at the Umbrella factory was not an accident. That the factory manufactured bioweapons and Umbrella was carrying out the final test on one of its newest weapons at the dilapidated factory.

The regular employees who worked there were unaware of what Umbrella was actually creating, and they paid for it with their lives, including Sheva's mother and father...

After concluding the test, Umbrella took measures to conceal the entire affair. With the assistance of the government's army they destroyed the factory along with the entire town, effectively wiping the town Sheva had called home off the map.

At this news Sheva was filled with rage. She hated Umbrella and blame them for her parent's deaths, and she hated the government for just rolling over at Umbrella's behest.

It was at this moment she decided to join the guerrillas in their fight against the government.

Sheva started out by doing laundry, cooking meals, and taking care of other chores. After only a few years with the guerrillas, she was given her first gun. She doesn't like to talk about her time with the guerrillas. Perhaps the memories are too painful, or maybe she's too ashamed of what she did there.

One of her main duties with the guerrillas was to go into town and purchase supplies for the group.

For seven long years Sheva stayed with the guerrillas.

By this time she was a teenager, and had spend most of her known life with the guerrillas. Perhaps due to her age, when she went into town, the townspeople never suspected her of being a guerrilla fighter. It could be for this very reason that she was the one they sent.

It was on one of these occasions while she was in town that a man approached her. He looked like a local, but spoke with a strange foreign accent. Handing her a piece of paper and speaking in a hurried voice, he stated:

"Read this. If you believe what it says, come to the church in the back alley in two hours."

After speaking these words he disappeared into the crowd as quickly as he appeared. Sheva turned the paper over in her hand, and her eyes were drawn to one word - Umbrella.

It was the same pharmaceutical company whose selfish aims took her parents from her. If that incident had never happened, perhaps her life would have been different.

The message on the paper said that the guerrillas were planning on using bioweapons to conduct a large- scale terrorist attack that would overthrow the government. Umbrella was going to make a deal with the guerrillas to provide them with the bioweapons. The man wanted Sheva's help in stopping the deal from going through.

At first Sheva thought it was a government trap, but deep down she knew the note spoke the truth. When asked how she knew, she had this to say:

"My country was strongly influenced by France, and many government officials spoke in French patois. But this man was different. I couldn't place his accent at the time, but somehow, I knew I could trust him."

Sheva followed her instincts.

She went to the church and met two men there.

One of them had given her the note earlier. The other wore a suit with no tie and said that we was from the U.S. government.

What the man in the suit wanted seemed straightforward enough - the apprehension of the representative from Umbrella. From what he said, this particular person held the key to causing an irreparable blow to Umbrella. But in order to arrest him, they needed Sheva's help. As long as they got their man, they wouldn't do anything to her or her fellow guerrillas.

Even if they did not succeed in arresting the man in question, they promised not to turn her or her companions over to the authorities.

The man in the suit's offer seemed credible. But could she betray those who had been like a family to her? The man seemed to understand Sheva's apprehension, so he asked her one simple question: "Don't you want to see Umbrella punished for what they've done?"

Sheva quickly nodded her head.

"That's why we selected you. But if you want to help us fight Umbrella, then you are going to have to leave your so-called friends."

"And then what? What's in it for me?"

"Look around! You know these guerrillas you are with aren't doing this for some greater good. They'll do anything to topple the government, including things you know are wrong. Help us, and you can finally do some good for the people of your country."

"And what makes you think a 15-year-old girl can help?"

"Some day you'll learn that age matters very little. A person's life is not defined by age, but by the choices they make. You have the chance to fight for something here that goes beyond just you, something that affects the entire world. Can you really walk away when so much is at stake?"

Sheva would never forget these words...

Three days later the special forces team arrived at the location where the deal was taking place. Sheva had left the door to the building unlocked, and she wore a wire so the team on standby could hear what was taking place.

The operation was a success. The target from Umbrella was quickly apprehended and taken away.

Sheva and the guerrillas were taken to the American Consulate, there to be release two days later with no charges pressed, just as promise. Recognizing Sheva's abilities, or perhaps moved by pity, the man in the suit offered Sheva the chance to start life anew in America.

With nothing left in Africa for her, Sheva decided to take him up on his offer.

Shortly after arriving in America, Sheva's high intelligence and drive quickly became apparent. She surpassed any and all expectations, even learning English to a native level in a mere six months. Within two years of arriving in the U.S. she enrolled at a university.

After graduating with high honors from her university, her legal guardian (the man in the suit) suggested that she join the newly formed BSAA to help others as she had been helped. Umbrella had already been dismantled many years prior, but Sheva had not let go of her hatred toward them and all others like them.

After completing basic training, she was assigned to the unit led by Josh Stone. There, she trained with his unit for eight months, learning everything she would need to know to survive in the field. After the completion of her training, she was hand-picked to become a BSAA agent. She is currently involved in operations throughout the world.

#bio #fancy tag later #shits LOOONG #damn #a bitch gotta link this lmao

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issela-santina · 11 months ago

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Crowley 🤝 Hereditary

unresolved, possibly unresolvable parental trauma because unfortunately for everyone, the now absent matriarch had always been that bad at being an actual loving mother

darkness always looms and wants to take you

spontaneous human combustion and guilt

lots and lots and lots of guilt, honestly

very expressive faces and voices (I laud you for this, Toni Collette and David Tennant, I really do)

intrusive thoughts?

basically both of these are about how to deal with the fact that you made absolutely stupid decisions in your life that put others' in danger

defying gravity (you're literally on the walls and ceiling)

the immense fear of seeing your best friend set on fire

possibly transgender demons

Aziraphale 🤝 Midsommar

light colors! and being welcomed home to the light in the most ominous way possible

love spells destroying the element of consent while breaking up a couple that kinda deserved to break up anyway

codependency

psychological horror

jumbled up foreign language

clinging to an estranged partner for security

an entire community dances while under some influence which messes up with their linguistic faculties a bit

lengthy northward drive

you get a cute little position of power at the expense of your relationship and literally the world

smiling at the end of a bitter breakup with a joy known only to the insane

@polysucks

Crowley is Hereditary and Aziraphale is Midsommar

if you make me elaborate on this, I will eventually but I fear for your brain cells

#hereditary 2018 #midsommar #ari aster #ineffable husbands #good omens #good omens crowley #good omens aziraphale

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husbandohunter · 4 years ago

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Moments of Despair #2 [Genshin Impact/Albedo x Reader]

Synopsis: "The alchemist who relished in his gifts only to fall from grace."

(A series of works where the boys deal with the passing of their beloved).

Diluc’s despair

Warnings: angst, tragedy, major character death and psychological horror (correct me if otherwise)

(A/n): I decided to take a slightly different approach this time. Regardless, it’s still killing my heart TwT.

---------------------------------------------------

Out of the many wonders of Teyvat, one thing Albedo loved most was how you were so different from him.

Difference ties to the unknown, one that must be discovered. He was drawn to you the first time he had laid his eyes upon your form standing at the heights of Mondstadt's cathedral. The Sisters scolded you from below, but all you did was reply with a wink amidst their chaos before soaring into the skies and letting the wind carry your glider. Reckless they said. For him, your recklessness was intriguing.

As the sun's light blinded his vision, everything he saw seemed like a glass barrier. For the ground was where he thrived and chalk was his core, it became the basis of Albedo's very existence. Even the geo Archon granted him a Vision of the same element to affirm his identity. The earth will forever be attached to his feet as he will keep on his stride until every last truth of Teyvat have all been realized. You, on the other hand, hailed from a place where he couldn't quite reach. What lies beyond this glass ceiling? Albedo found himself gradually holding onto a string of curiosities, a string he could touch but was not able to feel.

'Interesting,' he thought quietly, while the breeze slip between the fingers of his outstretched hand.

He was a character of logic, possessing sharp eyes that could pierce through the depths of the most complex formulas and a mind to predict their outcomes- as long as alchemy was still related. All impossibilities thrown in his way only paved a path for him to become the well known genius he was now. Whether it was alchemy or investigations with the Knights of Favonius, Albedo never failed to deliver the answers. But despite it all, he always found himself endlessly contemplating over things that were considered intangible. He wonders why you smile when there was nothing to laugh about. How could you tell between the complexities of the human heart? Albedo can't seem to put a finger on it.

'Why? What drives you? What are you thinking?'

The Chief Alchemist couldn't resist being fascinated by your unpredictability. It reels him in similar to a fish being baited out of the waters. However, unlike those creatures, Albedo only tightened his grip on the strings as if they were a lifeline, determined to find out what they truly felt like to the touch.

"I can't really say it's much of an answer," you hummed, clasping both hands behind your back before declaring with a grin, "To put it simply, you just gotta follow your heart."

'Follow your heart...' What does it mean to follow your heart?

"I'm afraid I still don't understand," he replied in a thoughtful manner. The statement never really resonated with him and it certainly weren't the words his Master taught when he was in the early stages of being created, "But it does suit you very much."

"Really? But still bring your head with you," a playful laugh escapes and you add while pointing a finger, "At least, it's what everyone tells me these days."

"Hm," Albedo then affirms with a nod, "I can definitely see why they would tell you that."

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean?"

The days go by and his repetitious march towards the truth remains the same. However, there was never a dull moment when you were at his side. Perhaps that was the reason why Albedo became so attracted to your aura. The way you'd follow around his experiments, eyes so full of enthusiasm at every step of the activity. Sometimes the events can get a little too out of hand in which he needs to step in and save you from getting stuck in slime condensates...constantly. Albedo grew fond of your childlike excitement even when you weren't entirely sure what was going on. He normally distanced himself from socializing as it never sparked his interest. Frankly, he was too much of a genius for mundane conversations. Your presence was rather refreshing in this case. You were an oddball, just like him, and for once the alchemist felt like he didn't need to place that glass barrier between the two worlds.

"You seem to be in a very good mood today Mister Albedo."

He was a man of subtle expressions yet anyone could notice the small gleam in his eyes whenever he saw you walking in the hallway. Sucrose often remarked with a giggle after she noticed her teacher holding his documents upside down. But who could blame him? Joy, fun, laughter. He was able to experience those emotions all because of you; his beloved. You were the colour to his canvas and the meaning to his flower. You were a force of nature. Like a warm breeze gracing upon the terrestrial lands, you move him.

Thump- thump- thump-

Strings around his world began to weave one whole picture while they also tugged inside his chest. God had finally blown the breath of life into mankind's body, it was only a matter of time before Albedo came to follow his heart too.

--------

"Alright, just one more detail aaaaand done!"

You gave a small tap using the tip of your pencil and leaned back to examine your artwork.

Masterpiece!

On days when Katheryne had no commissions assigned to the guild, Albedo would accompany you to the Whispering Woods and conduct his sketches there instead. He was aware of the discomfort Dragonspine brought as the temperature wasn't ideal for anyone except for him. You eventually learned that your lover was not only intelligently different from the rest but physically too. Albedo, aside from the Cavalry Captain, was mysterious in his own way. He was hard to read yet never came off as intimidating, no one knew of his origins nor they knew how he came to Mondstadt. You wondered why someone like him would have wanted to get involved with your shenanigans. Rosaria often gave warnings regarding the alchemist's 'hidden intentions' in which you'd roll your eyes in response. The Albedo you knew was far from that. He was a big brother to Klee, a man passionate about his work, he was the one golden star among the many silvers in your sky. He was your lover.

My Albedo.

Brushing a hand upon the drawing you made of him, you glided down the lines of his cheek before resting your finger on the mark by his neck. You gazed at it with fondness. Truly a masterpiece indeed.

"You do realize I'm still here?"

The paper nearly flies out of your grasp and you snatched it back to your chest, "HUH A-ALBEDO, WHEN DID YOU APPEAR???"

"I was with you the whole time," he states. The corner of his lip tug upward ever so slightly, "You said you wanted to sketch me."

"A-Ahahaha, so I did," you reply while scratching your head bashfully. 'I thought I was looking at a sculpture!!' You rushed to cover your face with the sheet. It wasn't that you forgot he was there, rather, you forgot he was still a living and breathing specimen who just witnessed your little serenade. As Lisa had once said, Albedo was easy on the eyes. His graceful features made him seem almost like an oil painting that could only be found in halls of the most prestigious households. You made sure to capture everything, every detail, every curve just like he had done with your portraits. Only now you noticed the sun already began its descent below the lakeside, dusting the landscape with hints of bright orange as it marked the day's end. If only time could slow down. But duty calls upon your next journey and there was no telling when you'd return. At the very least, a simple portrait would suffice to fill in the temporary gap of his absence.

"Can I see it?"

You glanced his direction while keeping the drawing close to your nose, "Are you sure about that? It might not be up to your expectations."

"I'm sure," Albedo affirms with a straight countenance, "I can already tell you've put a great amount of effort, otherwise you wouldn't have taken this long."

"Yeeaahh I kinda lost track of time. I guess it's only fair that you get to see the finished product," you say and shoved the drawing in front of him, "Tada! I present to you, my masterpiece!"

Albedo takes it out of your grasp and you watched the way his eyes expanded upon sight.

"Well? Whaddya think?"

Words could not describe the mixture of emotions that erupted within him. Was it distinguishable or abstract? Albedo spent his time pondering between the two answers as he examined the drawing closely. Despite the lines being slightly jagged and the unevenness in the placement of his eyes, he managed to make the shape of the entire image you were trying to convey. Perhaps it was all thanks to his well trained artistic vision which gave him the ability to do so. Or maybe he was simply biased. But there wasn't a shred of doubt that this was indeed your craftsmanship.

"You even added flowers in the background," he pointed out with amusement.

"It's the thing you make when using your elemental burst, I couldn't fit your hand in the picture so I decided to put it somewhere empty," you informed, "Out of everything, that one took me the longest."

"And the rabbits?"

"They resemble Klee's bombs!"

He lets out a chuckle, "I see."

Albedo kept his attention downward until he was mindlessly staring at the paper in hand. This was a memory made to be carried as you moved on to your next journey and it saddens him that he could not accompany you. If only time slowed down. Albedo wanted to hold onto the memory forever, because he knew once he gave it back, he wouldn't be able to see you for an uncertain amount of time.

"Do you really have to go?"

His voice was barely above a whisper. Guilt crept into your heart and you gingerly layed your fingers on his gloved ones, bringing down the paper that blocked his face. A pair of teal orbs held a reflection of your image as the sun's rays casted from the side. You returned it with a reassuring grin, hoping to soothe his worries somehow, "I just need to pay a visit to my father since he's been very sick lately. I'll be fine, so don't worry too much okay?"

Albedo turns over his palm and gave your hand a squeeze, "How long will it take?"

"I'm not sure but it will be a while. Snezhnaya is pretty far so..." you trailed off, "But my time in Mondstadt, with Klee and with you, I will never forget! I won't even if I tried."

When you were met with no answer, a breeze came in to fill the melancholic silence. He too will not forget and he would ensure that it was the same for you. Slowly, Albedo brought your hand up, past the center of his heart all the way to cupping his cheek. He allowed himself to indulge in your warmth, tangling the strands of his hair with your fingers while closing his eyes. Sweet flowers. You always carried the smell of sweet flowers.

"Albedo?" You gawked, "What's the matter?"

"...There are certain aspects where drawings can't imitate," he says, grip tightening ever so slightly, "How I feel against your skin, the shape of my jaw, your warmth radiating with my own. These are the things I want you to remember."

Breath leaves your slightly parted mouth. It was unfair how straightforward Albedo could be when showing his affection. Doing as he pleases without anyone's approval to the point it would even catch you off guard since he often absorbed himself in the arts of alchemy. But during times when Albedo did choose to express his feelings, you knew they came from a place of pure genuinity. The thought made it hard for you to tear away from him, "Did you ever find out what the strings felt like then?"

Albedo returns his gaze, long golden lashes hovering them as he smiles softly, "...I have."

As he began to reveal his stories, the dusk sky continued to flare across the landscape with colours of passion. Red, it was the thread that had led him to you, the same string that weaved him together as a whole. Albedo lays a kiss atop of your pinky, there was a reason why Mondstadtians called him the Chalk Prince. You didn't know the intention behind his sudden affection but he knew. It was a promise, one to ensure that the thread would also have you return safely back into his arms.

Oh how he hated the colour red.

"Al...bedo..."

With speed he never knew he had, Albedo scoops you into his embrace and held you close. How did everything happen so fast? He curses his mind as it proceeds to scan your injuries, drawing a conclusion where he wished to be wrong for once:

You were beyond help.

"Ah..haha..." you managed to laugh through bitter tears, "You don't have to say it. I know."

His breath hitches, trying to make sense of the feeling that was slowly tearing him apart from the inside. It's not real. Of course it wasn't, it couldn't be. What other possible answer was there to explain the numbness stinging his fingers? The reason for his shaking? Everything felt so cold. Your body hardly registered to his to touch, you were losing so much blood. You were losing. He was going to lose you.

"No," Albedo shakes his head, "We still have time. I'll go find help."

Please, hold on.

He forced himself to think. The ruin hunter ran off shortly after it had ambushed you, by now the Knights would eventually noticed and apprehended it on sight. They couldn't be too far. All he needed was to carry you back to safety and everyone can go home. Albedo darted his eyes all over the place, breaths becoming shallower with each passing second. Where? Where to go? Which route was best to not overexert your wounds? Think. Think. Think. Why couldn't he think?

"A..." You watched him in your helpless state. Every part of you throbbed with pain but it pains you even more to see the renowned genius who stood atop the pedestal of elegance and grace so utterly, undoubtedly lost. This was not the goodbye you wanted, though death already had you tight in their grasps. Not yet. Using the last particle of your strength, you tried to stay alive as long as possible. Just a little bit more time.

Albedo freezes when a trembling hand extends itself to cup around his cheek. Every single thought he had in mind vanished and was replaced by a loud ring resonating in his ears. Dreadfully, mechanically, he turns his attention to where you lay.

"Don't cry," you whisper, "I love you, don't cry- okay?"

Albedo grimaces, shutting his eyes closed as he allows the pent up sadness to flow out of him completely, "I can't," he said in a shaky voice, "Please. Stay."

"I'm sorry," Your vision blurs and he hugs you even more. Drawing your final breath, you relay your most cherished words through a broken smile, "But no matter w-where I go...I won't for..ge.."

The moment your hand fell, Albedo finally understood the difference between death and loss.

It was...suffocating. Having the air trapped in his throat, begging to release yet it hurts to speak. The never ending stabs that pulsed within his veins rushed forth like the scraping blizzard of Dragonspine until his whole body lost all its senses. The world was shattering. He could no longer feel your weight. He could no longer feel.

(Y/n).

Albedo glances at his blood stained fingers where the thread had been severed, wide eyes drowning in sorrow. What a horrible feeling. Was this a warning sent by the gods? For stepping into the boundaries of knowing too much? Ah the curse of knowledge man must bear when eating the temptatious fruit. It was the result of choosing to love you. With life, death is inevitable and with love, it will eventually bring pain. Everything had a price to pay and as an alchemist, Albedo knew that better than anyone.

"...Meaningless..."

But he refused to accept it.

Cradling your corpse, he leans in and places a kiss on your forehead, lips quivering as they lingered for a second too long before gathering the strength to stand back on his feet. Nothing will stop the alchemist from reuniting with you. If the laws wished to take you away from him then he will use everything in his power to fight against those laws.

"This is not goodbye..." Albedo said to the sleeping girl, "And it will never be."

When the sun sinks below the plains and the stars lose their light, the sky had been replaced with a palette of darkness. It was time to go home.

------

"Have you all heard about the rumours?"

A group of knights gather in the corner as they whisper about. Sucrose stops on her tracks and hides behind a wall, clutching the book close to her chest in an attempt to stay hidden.

"Another criminal disappeared from the dungeons? Crazy..."

"More like creepy. I was told that place might be haunted by some dead prisoner's ghost. Even the Church is hopping onto this case."

"Well I hope it doesn't get any worse. So many of us started going on night patrols..."

Their voices faded out of range as the anemo user backtracks her steps carefully. Several months passed since the news of mysterious kidnappings have been announced to the public. Rumours of their whereabouts swirled around the city and much to her discomfort, Sucrose happened to catch every single one of them. There couldn't possibly be evil spirits lurking in the Favonious Headquarters right? She silently shrieks at the thought, shaking her head furiously to stop her mind from going too deep. No, I have to find him. Without wasting another minute, the anemo user sprinted towards the stairs all the way up to the second floor before stopping directly in front of her teacher's office. Despite the adrenaline that occured at the same time, she made sure to knock.

No answer.

"Strange, he told me he would be here today..." Sucrose muttered to herself. But suddenly she heard the sound of objects shifting from the otherside, signaling that there was indeed someone occupying the room. Without realizing, she held her breath out of anticipation.

"Come in."

The door creaks as she opens them, giving her enough space to slip between the gap, "Mister Albedo?"

"You're early today," The Chief Alchemist noted from his desk, "Is there something the matter?"

"Y-You mean you don't know? There was just another case about a person disappearing from the dungeons," Her tone became more frantic as she rambled to herself, "The kidnapper never leaves a trace and no one knows how they were able to get out. Even when we ask the guards what happened, they can't seem to remember as if...as if someone casted a spell on them!"

"A spell?" He inquires, "I suppose that could be a possibility."

"I think so too. I-It's the only explanation that makes sense! I mean...ghosts don't exist after all," Sucrose nervously looks down at her shoes while giving her book a squeeze, "But why? Who could be capable of such advanced techniques? No matter how hard I try, I can't seem to understand their intentions."

"...Yes. It is a very strange occurrence indeed."

Noticing her teacher's withdrawn attitude, Sucrose couldn't help but feel flustered at her own behaviour, "Ah my apologies Mister Albedo, I didn't mean to go off track. Have there been any progress on the investigations so far?"

Albedo briefly glanced at the various documents splayed across his table. His reputation as an incredibly intelligent individual had reached far and wide through Mondstadt. This led to the authorities requesting his assistance regarding the recent matters, despite him specializing in the alchemical field, he was also the Captain of their Investigation Team. Although, Albedo detested partaking in things he deemed irrelevant to his research;

"I'm afraid I would need more evidence to draw a conclusion."

"Eh? You still need more?"

He could not deny that the given authoritative position had provided much benefits to his own accord.

"My expertise lies in the subject of alchemy," Albedo reasoned and proceeds to intertwine his fingers in front of his mouth, "Humans on the other hand, are very unpredictable in nature. Even the essence of their existence is hard to obtain."

"Essence of their existence?" Sucrose repeated softly. She wanted to ask what he meant but the blank expression was evident enough to signal his impatience. At least, that was what she thought, "Nevermind! I have something that might help," taking out a slip from her textbook, she handed it to him, "It's the report Captain Kaeya gave me. He said that the culprit might be a traitor coming from the Knights of Favonius."

He narrows his eyes.

"I-I think he might be right! Just think about it, we haven't found anything at all for the past few months but when we do, I sometimes feel like we're just running in circles...oh what if it's becau-"

"Sucrose."

"Y-Yes?!"

Albedo calmly looks at the flustered girl, not realizing how sharp his tone was, "You're overthinking again. Perhaps it's best that you take this day off."

"But I came here to help," she insisted, "I know it hurts to lose someone you love! Don't you understand that we're all worried about you? And Klee, she..."

"..."

"Please Mister Albedo, if there's anything I could do-"

"No need," he cuts her off once again, "Your stress levels are too high. We can't go any further if you continue to act like this."

"Oh," her ruby eyes casted to the side, "I understand..."

"Good. Now, if you would excuse me," Albedo bid her farewell and watched as the door clicked behind her, observing every detail until he was sure that the absolute silence had returned. He picks up Kaeya's document. Such remarkable handwriting. But of course, appearances are only meant to be displayed on the surface for the Captain was a sly man, wearing a mask to shield what lies underneath. Just like his letter, they were full of innuendos and condensed meanings, orchestrated together until the truth spoke loudly to Albedo himself.

"So, that's what he thinks."

Perhaps the alchemist should have been a little more discreet.

--------

There was a certain place in Dragonspine that no one dared to enter. But those who have, they never return.

"Hm, no response. Now as for the next step..."

And he was the reason why.

Taking the sword out of the transmutation circle, Albedo turned to the snowy hill nearby and activated his alchemy. A small portion of it dissipates, revealing a trench that went so deep underground that even warmth couldn't outplay the sheer cold. It was the perfect hiding place for the evidence to lay out of sight and an environment where only he could handle. The alchemist tossed the leftover along with the others before exiting quietly, summoning back the ice to bury his victims once again. Another day, another experiment, another stain goes to his title. The path he walked upon was one littered with corpses and the sins he committed. But despite the bones crunching beneath his feet and the weight of the dead hanging on his shoulders, the alchemist was numb to it all. Like an entity floating in space with nothing to hold, he became unable to feel.

"I'm back," When reaching the center of Starglow Cavern, Albedo puts his hand on the icicle and caressed it's hard cold surface, "Did you sleep well?"

The girl did not respond. Her eyes were closed and her skin was as young as ever. She was frozen in time.

"You must have."

Albedo felt the sword beginning to shake in his grasp as it resonated with his energy. Dust particles emitted from the hilt and slowly made their climb to the side of his arm. Still, Albedo's attention did not waver, "To this day, I've been thinking about what you told me the first time we met."

"..."

"Follow your heart. I couldn't understand it at first but after being around your presence, I believe I can finally recognize what that term means."

He closes his eyes as he envisioned your lively form running across the landscape. Albedo, Albedo! The sound of his name was mixed with your laughter while Klee came into the scene and caught the dandelions with you. A content smile formed on his countenance as he watched from afar, even if it was just a memory, "It's everything. The breakfast we ate together, to the nights spent camping outside, and the silly moments we shared, they bring all these colours that I never knew existed."

"..."

Albedo curls his fingers against the ice as he continues to lament, "Perhaps that's why I began noticing the strings around me. The closer I was to answer, the more I felt it was necessary to discover what they are. All this time, you were the answer I was searching for," Moist begins to build up in his eyes but they freeze up once reaching the corners. How cruel. Despite what he went through, he wasn't even granted the liberty to cry, "Because with you, I'm able to feel them."

He wonders what you would think if you saw him right now. Albedo peers at his reflection casted on the crystalline surface, the frame of his face had been decorated with streaks of purple and red, spreading out like tree branches as they both fought for dominance. The teal coloured orbs you once adored were beginning to transform to a colour that reminded him of his darkest days. This was Albedo's true nature- a monster, a being that wasn't human, the essence in which you never had the chance to see.

"I know I may not be the same as I was before," he added, "But if that is what it takes to follow your heart, will you let me feel the strings again?"

Would you still love me the same?

"..."

"If so, then please understand my actions," Albedo takes a step back as he held out the sword in front of him. At last, the preparations have finally been completed. He plunges the blade to the ground with full force and the surrounding area begins to shake under the power accumulated through many, intentional sacrifices. To revive the dead was a forbidden art as it came with heavy consequences. If it weren't for Albedo's talent and quick wit, the process would have consumed him long before executing the last stage. He winces, the pain was excruciating. It was hard for him to ignore the sound of his skin cracking below his ears and all the way to his nose as they fall off in the shape of small rock-like chunks. Everything hurt so much that even death sounded like a sweet dream but Albedo couldn't afford to give up. He had already come this far, his hands completely washed with sin and his reputation already broken beyond repair, Albedo had nowhere else to go. This was his last destination.

"Soon-" he pants between choked breaths. Soon your eyes will open. He could drown in your embrace, one that was warm and not cold. Soon he will be able revive those cherished memories from a frozen past. It was all he could think of right now. Your existence was the reason why a part of him felt whole and your death made him realize how painful it was to tear away those pieces. Albedo refused to let go of those pieces, they had already become a part of him. And if this path ended up tearing him even more, then so be it.

"I should have stopped you the moment you were born."

The intruder snapped him awake and he swung around to where they stood. But before Albedo could make out who it was, they lunged past him with incredible speed, kicking the sword off the ground while severing his two arms once and for all. They flew to the side, blood dyed purple trickling from the edges of his joint as he struggled to stay upright.

"Dains...leif..."

Dainsleif watched the alchemist fall onto his back as the light around him slowly faded away. He turned his gaze to where the objective was and noticed a girl encased within the ice. The man sighs out of relief when she shows no signs of life, he came just in time, "So this is how it ends."

Albedo weakly stared at the blonde man. He attempted to say something but the blood caught in his mouth prevented him from that.

"Save your breath, you won't be having any," Dainsleif remarks in a cold manner and glared at his bloodied form, "The renowned Chief Alchemist of Mondstadt and an important member of Ordo Favonious. Hmph, what an interesting turn of events. Out of everyone, I never thought you were the type to act so foolish."

Foolish...what a foreign name to be called as. He never heard anyone tell him he was foolish.

"Truly a pity," With a flick of a wrist, Dainsleif brought his sword to Albedo's neck. It was unbelievable how he had the endurance to go through all that pain while still breathing at this point but what is there to be expected from a monster? "Remember that all actions have consequences."

The alchemist watched as his life flashed before him, the weight of his sins had finally caught up. He had always seen the world as a platform for his objectives and results were merely a natural cause after attempting many experiments. But death as a consequences was an unbearble realization upon his final moments. He abandoned his title, his pupil and his dearest sister. In the end, he was still unable to fulfill his duty.

"I just..." Albedo mumbled, his words slurring together, "wanted..."

As the ashes turn to ashes and dust becomes dust, chalk returns to the earth, forever yearning a place that can never be reached.

#genshin impact #genshin impact headcanons #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact scenarios #albedo #albedo x reader #genshin albedo #genshin impact albedo #genshin x reader #genshin scenarios #genshin headcanons #genshin imagines #genshin impact imagines #nya-writes #dainsleif #genshin impact dainsleif #sucrose

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shihalyfie · 3 years ago

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@sage-striaton replied to your post:

Idk how people can say Frontier has characters that lack depth. Imo it’s a very psychological season. The whole adventure thing is aimed to making them grown in their behaviours and feelings, it’s a big metaphor of their development

I’m sorry for hijacking your response to my post to segue this into another rant of mine, but I want to emphasize that one of my goals with this blog (if I can be said to have any) is that I really, really, really want people to re-examine whether they actually believe in the rhetoric that’s been dominating this fanbase for two decades, or whether there’s more to it. This is especially in regards to the fact that we’re talking a series deliberately written in such a way that it’ll change meaning and nuance as you get older, so it can “grow up” with you in a sense, and yet it seems like -- especially in regards to Adventure through Frontier, due to their position as the oldest series that the majority of the fanbase was elementary or preteen age during -- people are still regurgitating the same rehashed twenty-year-old ideas like they’re undeniable law. It’s one thing if they’re saying it because the series didn’t sit well with them the first time and they don’t want to watch it again, but we’re reaching a recurring problem where it’s sort of “brainwashing” even people who don’t actually believe it but feel compelled to go along with it, or wouldn’t feel that way if it weren’t for peer pressure. Obviously, there are dissenting opinions, and ones that are even very loud about that, but that pressure remains.

The mainstream opinion in the fanbase is that Adventure is untouchable and impervious to any criticism, 02 is its inferior sequel with half-baked characters, Tamers is an auteur work that’s the “deepest” of the original tetralogy due to being dark, and Frontier is devoid of much substance at all. Even those who don’t really believe in this will still be pressured to go alongside it, those who like 02 or Frontier will be pressured to consider it a “guilty pleasure”, and it’s only very recently when certain events revealed that the idea of 02 actually having quite its own fervent and passionate fanbase that likes it on its own merits became properly recognized. (I have actually noticed a huge uptick in 02 fans, especially casual ones, being more shameless in talking about liking it in the last two years; you’re still going to get the obnoxious person “reminding” you how bad it apparently is if you bring it up, but it’s not nearly as prevalent as it used to be.) I’m not talking about whether something is a “good” or “bad” series -- that concept doesn’t really exist to me as much as whether it’s “to one’s tastes” or not, and I think one of the joys of this franchise is that it has things that cater to people with vastly different preferences -- as much as a lot of potential for analysis and intimate thought about these very fascinating series. Even if 02 and Frontier were as shallow or half-baked as they were accused of, I wouldn’t think it’d be shameful to like them for one’s own reasons anyway, but what frustrates me is that I just don’t think that’s true in the first place!!

Not helping is that there’s still a refusal among the fanbase to admit that there were substantial differences in American English dubbing (especially in regards to Adventure and 02), which I don’t mean as a bad thing in the sense that some people prefer to stick only with that dub and consider that version what they want to work with, but in the sense that the treatment of them as “the same thing” has been horribly detrimental when two people, one coming from that dub and one coming from the Japanese version (or a dub more closely based on it), will end up often having an argument doomed to go nowhere because they were never talking about the same thing to begin with. Recently, a friend admitted to me that although they’d switched to the Japanese version a long time ago, they still couldn’t get the image of Daisuke and Takeru having an inherently hostile relationship (they don’t) out of their head due to the influence of that dub, and although they consciously knew better -- at least enough to admit this to me -- it wasn’t helped by the fact that the fanbase itself continues to reinforce this image because of how normalized it is to treat the dub version and the Japanese version as “virtually the same” and for Western fanbase discourse to assume you should be projecting those takes into the Japanese version. If you’re hanging out in English-speaking circles but are working from the Japanese version or a dub directly based off of it, you do actually have to filter out a lot of takes you’re hearing because they won’t actually apply to the version you’re watching, but not a lot of people realize this.

All four of Adventure through Frontier share tons of key staff, especially Seki, known for her focus on wanting the kids in the audience to be able to empathize with and relate to the characters on screen. All four share some of the best character work I’ve seen not only in this franchise, but also in kids’ media in general, and I also stress that a lot of this has a ton of nuance that isn’t always apparent unless you read between the lines. I do understand that a lot of this probably went over our heads as kids, and I won’t say that the choice to execute it this way should be impervious to criticism, but nevertheless, I think it’s important to call attention to the fact it is there, and much of it becomes recognizable once you see it that way; for instance, so much of "it's contradictory character writing!" comes from the fact that the series tries to represent humans in their inconsistent, messy ways, and while it'll feel "messy" from a writing trope perspective, when you think about it as "since this person has this mentality, does it make sense to approach this with this mindset?", suddenly it becomes very consistent. The supposedly “shallow” 02 and Frontier characters will act in ways that match existing psychological profiles meant for actual humans to terrifying degrees, in ways that you might actually recognize even better once you’ve hit adulthood and start intimately understanding things like depression or anxiety in ways you might not have before. Shockingly, “having heart, important themes, and kindness towards the human condition” are completely valid reasons to uplift a creative work in ways distinct from technical writing or cerebrality or how many tropes they subvert or whatever.

On the flip side, people praise Adventure and Tamers for being the naturally “superior” works with better writing, but when it comes to talking about why the writing is supposedly better, a good chunk of the reasons stated don’t actually explain anything substantial, or go back to actually being passive-aggressive dunks on the other series in some form -- it’s because 02 and Frontier’s character writing sucks that badly, or because Adventure had the “best plot” (which may be true if by “best” you mean “easiest to understand”, but that doesn’t mean much to someone who might not be very happy about how its story progression is just a boss rush), or because Tamers is the “deepest” when by “deep” they actually mean “cerebral, dark, and unsubtle about it” without any further meaning (as if Adventure and 02 were idealistic series that never went into anything nuanced and not, say, the fact they went very viciously deep into societal issues between parents and children, psychological horror, and intimate takes on the human condition). I’m personally saying this as someone who does think Adventure and Tamers have a lot to praise in terms of their approaches to realism and the unique aspects each bring to the table, and I feel that people like this are doing them more of a disservice by not bothering to uplift them for any reason that isn’t actually just inherently condescending. I mean, even taking this outside of the original tetralogy for a bit, when I was plugging Appmon earlier, there’s a reason I focused more on its theme and character writing and the use of “dark” writing to convey its sheer range, rather than trying to boil it down to a shallow “it looks cheery but gets really messed up later!”, which is unfortunately an argument I’ve been seeing about it lately.

In the end, when I write my meta, I write it "making a case" for my point of view, and I welcome others to disagree, but if you disagree, I really hope it'll be because you personally disagree, and not because the entire fanbase has been saying otherwise for twenty years and I sound like a radical. I’m not saying that everyone’s consensus takes are completely unfounded, but frankly speaking, this fanbase has some really bad takes, and in the past few years I’ve found it freeing to not only “say what you feel without worrying what others think”, but actually go out of my way to outright try and purge all the preconceived notions and pick only the ones I agree with because I actually agree with them. I encourage you to do it too! And if you do, you might find things about something you like that you didn’t realize before.

#digimon #shiha's ask box #sage-striaton #digimon adventure #digimon adventure 02 #digimon tamers #digimon frontier #shihameta

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wild-karrde · 3 years ago

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Reunion - Part 13

Master List | Previous Part | Next Part

A/N: As always, thank you to the wonderful @teletraan-meets-jarvis for beta reading this chapter for me! :)

Senna was certain she’d misheard Rex. Fives is dead. He died in Rex’s arms on Coruscant. But even with all of that knowledge, the tattoo on his temple combined with the blaster scar in the middle of his chest all but confirmed it in her mind. He’s so sedated I can barely sense him. No wonder I didn’t feel him when we were in the corridor.

“What do we do?” she whispered to no one in particular.

“I must remind you all that we were attempting to get in and out of this facility without being detected,” Tech said quietly. “If we remove him from the chamber, they’ll know-“

“We are not leaving him,” Echo snarled.

They all turned to Rex. He had straightened to a kneeling position, but still was staring at Fives with a look of shock and horror. Senna could feel the emotions rolling off of him in bursts like a mismatched fireworks show. Horror. Joy. Fear. Betrayal. Happiness. Sadness. She stood, resting her hand on his shoulder, and he blinked as if coming out of a trance, taking in the three sets of eyes trained on him expectantly. His tongue darted out to moisten his lips.

“He comes with us,” he rasped. “I’m not abandoning him again.”

Tech nodded, turning back to the console to begin studying the chamber’s mechanisms. Senna pulled Rex to his feet. “You couldn’t have known,” she whispered. “You were told he was dead and that his body was disposed of. You can’t blame yourself.”

“I do though,” he replied, his eyes meeting hers, haunted. “I absolutely blame myself. I failed him.”

Senna gripped his shoulders. “There’ll be time for self-immolation later. Right now, you need to focus so we can get him and the four of us out of here. Things just got a whole lot more complicated.” His eyes met hers, and he nodded. She released him, turning to Echo. He had pushed himself to a sitting position but had removed his helmet and was staring up at Fives with the same haunted expression Rex had. Senna noted his hands trembling as he fidgeted nervously. Her eyes met Tech’s behind his goggles.

You and I have to take charge here. This has knocked them off balance.

Tech nodded slightly, turning back to his work with the chamber. “I believe I have found the mechanism to drain the tank and remove Fives. We’ll need a way to transport him out of here though.”

Senna whirled, taking in the room around them, her eyes scanning the equipment before she found what she was looking for. “Rex, Echo, help me get this medpod working. This is how we’ll get Fives out of here.” Giving them a task to focus on seemed to somewhat calm their minds. The two of them allowed her to pull them to their feet, and they immediately got to work getting the pod up and running. Senna left them to it, coming to stand next to Tech.

“Will we injure him if we take him out of here? He’s so thin.” She’d seen injured clones throughout the war, but none that looked as frail as Fives now did. Years of not being allowed to use his body had atrophied his muscles to the point where he looked as though a stiff wind would break him in half. His body was bare except for a pair of undershorts, and Senna winced at how pronounced his ribs and hip bones were. He makes Echo look bulky. Senna chewed on her lip, wondering if Fives could even stand on his own without help after all of the time he’d spent in the chamber.

“I don’t think we risk injuring him, but I believe we should keep him sedated. We have no idea what he’s endured psychologically, and I think reviving him in an uncontrolled environment adds risk we cannot tolerate right now.”

Senna nodded in agreement. “Do you have what you need to keep him under?”

Tech typed a few commands, and Senna heard the unmistakable sound of a drainage system kicking in. The fluid surrounding Fives slowly began to lower in the chamber, and he with it. As the tank drained, Tech glanced over at her. “The medpod should be capable of keeping him unconscious. Once we get back to the Marauder, I believe I have enough anesthetic to keep him unconscious until we arrive at Yavin 4.”

Senna gripped his shoulder, giving it a light squeeze. “Ok. Good.” She turned back to Rex and Echo to help them get the pod powered the rest of the way on. The white pod looked like a coffin, and Senna could see a shiver run through Rex.

“You alright?” she asked quietly.

“Yeah. It’s just…this is similar to the pod we put Tup in. That was one of the last times I saw Fives. I told him to stay with Tup. The next thing I knew, Tup was dead and Fives was on Coruscant, muttering incoherently about the chips. And then he was dead too. I…I failed him.” His hands were resting on the pod, and they clenched into fists, shaking with emotion.

Senna gripped Rex’s chin between her fingers, turning his face to hers. “If you want to get Fives out of here, I need you to pull it together, Captain.” Her voice was even, but the pain in his eyes was tearing her apart inside. “You have to be strong right now, Rex. For all of us, but especially for Fives. We can get him out of here, but we need you in your right mind right now.” Rex swallowed hard and nodded.

Senna watched as the broken man in front of her transformed back into the captain of the 501st that she’d heard so much about during the war. Rex straightened his spine, squared his shoulders, and slid his helmet back on. Echo watched him for a moment before nodding and doing the same. Senna’s heart simultaneously soared and broke at the sight of the man she loved slipping into the leadership role he was so suited for, even with his emotions whirling around him. He’s had to endure so much, and here’s one more thing. But if we can get Fives out of here, perhaps some of the weight will lift off of his shoulders and one less ghost will haunt him.

Fives was now resting at the bottom of the empty chamber, his body slumped to one side. Tech ran a quick purge cycle, and a blast of air dried Fives and the inside of the tube. Tech punched a few more buttons, and a panel on the side of the chamber slid open. Rex and Echo quickly moved towards it, pulling Fives’s limp form out of the chamber. They rested his head in Echo’s lap, and Echo began working to remove his oxygen mask while Rex moved down his body to start pulling off the medical sensors. Senna pushed the hovering medpod closer with Tech, opening the top of it. Once Rex and Echo had removed all of the connecting equipment, they carefully lifted Fives into it, and Senna and Rex secured Fives’s body with straps while Echo stood at the head of the pod. Senna noted Echo gently pushing some of the hair out of Fives’s eyes, his hand lingering on his twin’s forehead. Turning back, she noted Rex was struggling with the last strap across Five’s shins, his hands shaking noticeably. Gently, she took the strap from his hands, cinching it tightly enough to keep Fives from being jostled during transport. She couldn’t see Rex’s eyes behind his helmet, but he gave her a small nod of gratitude before they reached up together and closed the lid of the pod. Tech tapped a few buttons on the control panel, and the pod hummed softly as it hovered in front of them.

“We’ll have to tip it vertically for transport, at least until we get into the ventilation duct again. Otherwise, we’ll never get him around the corners,” Tech stated evenly, and Senna nodded, standing clear as Tech maneuvered the pod into a vertical configuration, the viewport hovering at eye level with Fives still unconscious behind it.

Senna looked around at the three clones, nodding at each of them. “Alright, let’s get out of here before they notice he’s gone.” She gently rested her hand on Rex’s arm. The emotions were still pouring off of him and Echo so strongly she felt like a stone on a shore being beaten by waves, but she steadied herself as they moved quickly towards the door.

Pressing her palm against the door, Senna reached out once more. “Hallway’s empty, but we’ve got to hurry.” The stepped out into the corridor, carefully guiding the medpod towards the lift. Tech jogged ahead, opening the doors and helping them pull the medpod inside, pressing it against one of the walls as the others crowded in. Senna bent at an odd angle to reach the button for the maintenance level, concentrating on her breathing to try and lessen the blows of the emotions around her. Without thinking, she slipped her hand into Rex’s, giving it a tight squeeze. She felt his thumb graze absently over her knuckles before they released each other.

Senna felt some of the tension leak from her shoulders as they stepped onto the maintenance level and found it empty once more. “Hurry,” she whispered again, and they guided the medpod down the hallway towards the exit.

“Will the pod be able to survive the heat in the ventilation duct?” Echo asked.

“The specifications rate it for much higher temperatures than this,” Tech replied. “However, I still believe we shouldn’t linger.”

As if to enunciate Tech’s point, an alarm began blaring several levels up and quickly crescendoed until it was echoing in the empty halls around them.

“Kriff,” Rex muttered. “So much for making it out quietly.”

Echo scrambled to open the door, and in a matter of minutes, they were jogging back down the ventilation shaft in the sweltering heat with the pod hovering in between them, tilted down so that Fives was now lying on his back. Senna’s heart was slamming against her ribs as she led them forward, trying to focus on each twist and turn to see if they were being awaited by an ambush or pursued from behind. Instinct guided her hand to the lightsaber dangling from her belt, her fingers grazing the warm metal of its hilt.

Their quicker pace brought them to the exit in a much shorter amount of time, and as they rounded the last bend in the tunnel, Senna felt relief at the spot of sunlight that came into view. “Almost there,” she panted, sweat running down her temples and her back. The only sounds were the pounding of their boots, the muffled sounds of their breathing, and the low hum of the medpod as they approached the end of the duct.

“Tech, should we get the jammer out again for the surveillance camera?” Senna asked.

“No time,” Rex grunted. “They already know we’re here. We shouldn’t stop to try and be sneaky. Let’s just get out of here quickly.” The whine of the alarms was already growing louder in the distance.

“We should assume that they’ll be swarming the perimeter to ensure we don’t escape,” Tech panted from beneath his helmet. “In which case, they’ll head to our location the moment we’re spotted.”

“We’ll just have to be faster then,” Echo replied.

Rex paused, and they all slowed. “We won’t beat them on foot, especially if the Marauder’s still ten klicks out.” He glanced over at Tech. “Think you can jog ahead and meet us? If nothing else, at least get the ship out of the cavern? It’ll be tough to get the medpod below ground.”

Tech considered it for a moment. “I should be able to beat you by at least ten minutes if I go ahead. The pod slows us down substantially.”

“Can it go faster?” Senna asked.

“Not without modifications that we do not have time to make,” Tech answered.

They reached the edge of the tunnel, pausing for a moment in the cooler air from outside. It was still warm and humid, but compared to the sweltering heat inside the ventilation duct, it felt like the most pleasant spring breeze.

“Alright, ready Tech?” Senna asked.

“As I can be,” he replied. “I’ll see you all at the ship.” With that, he tossed them a half salute before jogging off towards the trail. Senna heard the camera above the duct turn in his direction as they guided the medpod out and began guiding it towards the direction Tech had run. Her heart was racing once more as she strained her ears for the sound of Imperials pursuing them. Chancing a look over at Rex, she couldn’t see his face, but she could see his head swiveling back and forth, scanning for enemies as well.

They won’t be far behind.

---

They managed to make it to less than a klick from the clearing when they heard the first roar TIEs overhead and the crashing of boots through the underbrush. Rex’s blood ran cold as he looked behind them. All he could see was greenery for now, but he knew that their luck was dwindling. We’re so close. We have to make it.

“Tech, can you hear us?” he commed.

“I can, and it would appear we have company. I still have the Marauder underground, and it doesn’t appear I’ve been detected, but it is ready to go.”

Rex thought for a moment. “Good, keep it there until I tell you. We’ll have to load up and get out of here quickly.” He glanced over at Senna, and he could see the fear and concern in her features, but also the determination in her eyes. She yanked her lightsaber loose from her belt and he drew his blasters just as the first bolt winged by their heads. They both whirled as a battalion of stormtroopers stepped into view, firing at them. Senna ignited her lightsaber, frantically deflecting the bolts back at their assailants, but one struck the pod. Echo swore loudly, trying to catch it as it fell the meter to the ground.

“Is it disabled?” Rex shouted.

“Yeah, it’s dead,” Echo replied, a note of hopelessness starting to edge into his voice.

Rex met Senna’s eyes once more. “Get Fives out of the pod. Take him and go,” she said. “I’ll hold them off.”

“No, Senna-“

“It wasn’t a request, Captain. Get Fives back to the ship. I’ve got this.”

He could see it was useless to argue, and deep down, he was grateful for it. Jogging to Echo, he helped him pry the medpod open and undo the straps holding Fives’s unconscious form in place. The two of them each grabbed one of Fives’s arms, throwing them over their shoulders so they could carry him in between the two of them.

“GET MOVING!” Senna growled, stepping forward to engage the stormtroopers. Rex looked back at her one more time, her braid waving wildly as her ice blue blade whirred and hummed. She advanced towards the Imperials, cutting them down without hesitation.

“Let’s go, Rex,” Echo huffed, readjusting his grip on Fives’s waist. The two of them shuffled quickly towards the Marauder.

The going was slower than Rex preferred, but they were careful, avoiding treacherous vines and roots that snaked out from the surrounding jungle, threatening to trip them. Not sure Fives could take any kind of fall with the state he’s in. Rex’s muscles burned with the extra weight, and he could hear Echo panting on Fives’s other side as they picked their way through the brush. Finally, the clearing came into view, and Rex struggled to get to his comm on his vambrace.

“Tech, bring the ship up to the clearing. We’re here.”

“Be right there.”

They could hear the roar of the Marauder’s engines as Tech gently raised it out of the cavern, lowering its wings as he brought it down on the grass. Rex peered up at the sky to ensure the TIEs weren’t making a pass before nodding at Echo. Tech was at the door with his blaster, watching the path behind them.

“You know for as skinny as he is, he’s still awfully heavy,” Echo joked as they jogged towards the Marauder’s stairs.

“I’m gonna tell him you said that when he’s awake,” Rex replied, but the thought seemed to sober Echo.

“Yeah. When he’s awake.” The concern was unspoken. If he’s the same person when he does wake up.

“Where’s Senna?” Tech called.

“Covering our rear. She shouldn’t be too far behind us.”

As if on cue, the sound of blasterfire carried on the wind to them. Rex and Echo paused, turning to look back at the tree line. A flash of blue blinked through the green, followed by a shout.

“TECH, YOU HAD BETTER HAVE THOSE ENGINES HOT!”

Rex looked at Echo, and the former ARC trooper nodded at his captain, adjusting his grip. “Go. I’ve got him.” Rex slipped Fives’s arm off of his shoulders, shifting the weight onto Echo before drawing his blasters and sprinting back towards the jungle. Tech leapt down the stairs, helping Echo carry Fives as he kept his blaster trained towards where Senna would emerge.

Senna burst through the underbrush, her hair wild. Smudges of dirt were smeared all over her arms and clothing, and she was limping on her wounded leg once more. Rex swore loudly as he raced towards her, firing at every glimpse of white plastoid he could see. A blast caught Senna in the hip, sending her tumbling, but she scrambled forward on her hands and knees. Rex kept his right blaster trained on the stormtroopers as he reached his left arm down to her.

“Are you hit?” he shouted.

“No! No, I think I’m fine.” She pulled herself to a standing position, and they both took off running towards the Marauder once more. Echo was standing in the doorway of the ship, covering their backs, and Rex could see Tech sitting in the pilot’s seat, watching their retreat.

“GO!” Rex pushed Senna towards the stairs, and he heard her boots clang onto the metal as he turned, firing both blasters while backing up towards the ship. Suddenly, he heard the roar of twin ion engines, and he turned, taking the steps two at a time.

“TIES INBOUND, TECH. WE HAVE TO GO!”

“Everyone hang on!” Tech called from the cockpit before throwing the ship forward at breakneck speed. Rex slid his arm around Senna’s waist, pulling her to his chest as he gripped the doorway to the cockpit, holding the two of them up despite the ship’s acceleration. Echo scrambled past them and into the co-pilot seat, frantically punching buttons for hyperspace calculations.

“Be sure to add an extra stop in case they’re tracking us,” Rex called. “We can’t lead them back to base.”

“On it,” Echo shouted. “Making the jump now.”

Rex relaxed his grip on the durasteel door frame as he glanced down at Senna. Her face was streaked with dirt and a few scratches, and he reached down to sweep a few stray strands of hair out of her eyes. “What happened to you?” he asked quietly.

“Took a bit of a detour off the path to lead them away from you. Bought a few minutes.” She grinned and her eyes were sparkling.

“How’s your hip?” he asked, suddenly remembering how the bolt had caught her and sent her to the ground.

Senna’s brow furrowed for a second before her eyes widened in horror. Stepping back, she reached for the holster at her hip and let loose a loud curse as she pulled her datapad loose. The casing was scorched, a chunk of it missing. “NO! Nononononononono!” She fell to her knees, cradling the damaged hardware as if it were a child. Tech moved towards her from the cockpit, squatting down next to her and gently taking the datapad from her trembling hands.

“I fear it hit the data core,” he said, his face somber. “We may still be able to recover some of the files you stored on here, but I imagine a good portion of it is lost.” He gripped her shoulder in a surprisingly tender gesture. “I’m sorry, Senna.”

Rex could see the frustration in her eyes, and her teeth were already digging into her lip as she choked back tears. “Yeah. It’s alright. We’ll figure it out.” Her voice cracked as she hurriedly smoothed her tunic. “Tech, let’s go sit in the cockpit and record what I can remember on your datapad. Just in case we can’t recover anything.”

“Very good.” Tech stood, extending an arm down to her and carefully pulling her to her feet. “Is your leg alright?”

Senna rotated her leg and groaned when she saw a blood stain on the back of her calf. “Kriff.”

“Come along. We’ll get that fixed up as well,” Tech said, extending his arm for her to lean on as he guided her towards the cockpit. As she passed Rex, she reached out and gripped his arm.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “If I lost the file for Wolffe-“

“Then we’ll figure the next step out,” Rex replied, cutting her off. “And it will be alright. I’m just glad you’re not hurt too badly.” He shared her frustration, but in that moment, all he wanted to do was comfort her in some way, the same way she had ever since they’d found Fives. Leaning forward, he cradled the back of her head, pressing a kiss to her forehead. He felt her lean against him for a moment before drawing back, a small smile tugging at the corner of her lips.

“Go see to your brother,” she said quietly. “Tech and I can handle the flying.”

“I’ve sedated him again,” Tech said as he gently helped Senna sit in the co-pilot seat that Echo had vacated. “He should remain unconscious until we reach Yavin 4. However, should he start to come out of it, give him another injection of this.” Tech pressed a syringe into Rex’s hand. The captain swallowed hard and nodded.

Echo met his eyes as the two of them moved towards the bunk Fives had been placed in. His skin seemed slightly less ashen in the dim lighting of the Marauder, and his breathing appeared even as his chest rose and fell. Rex crouched down next to him, pushing his dark curls away from his forehead once more, revealing the tattoo on his temple. He finally let the tears come that had been threatening, although he was unsure if they were of joy, sadness, or both.

“I’m so sorry, Fives. I’m so sorry,” he whispered as he lowered his forehead to touch Fives’s. It’s been years. He spent years as their science experiment. If only I’d asked, if I’d pressed the issue. If I’d volunteered to escort his body back to Kamino. Maybe I would have known. Or had some suspicion. Something.

He felt Echo kneel next to him, his hand resting on Rex’s shoulder quietly. The gesture stilled his sobs, and Rex slowly sat back on his heels, his hand still cradling Fives’s head, much in the same way he had the last time he’d seen the ARC trooper.

“I only wanted to do my duty.”

“You couldn’t have known, Rex,” Echo rasped, his voice close to shattering. Glancing over, Rex could see tears in the eyes that they shared, the same eyes that Fives had. “None of us could have.”

Rex nodded, swallowing his sorrow. He knew Echo was right, but the words brought little solace. He felt Senna watching him, and he looked towards the cockpit. Her eyes were wet, glistening as she watched the three of them, and he could feel her longing to hold him and her understanding that this moment was not hers to invade, and he loved her more for it. Turning back to Fives, he shuddered as a new realization hit him, a spark of hope emerging from his grief.

We came to save one brother, and found another instead. Perhaps there are more out there.

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