#the pose is awkward because i had a different goal but it ended up as him just shielding himself from the rain..... be niceys

[televenus]

[profectua]

》ＢＬＵＥ ＬＯＣＫ Ｈｅａｄｃａｎｏｎｓ

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ; ɴᴏɴᴇ! ᴘᴜʀᴇ ᴄʀᴀᴄᴋ ʟᴍᴀᴏ

ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀꜱ; ɪꜱᴀɢɪ, ʙᴀᴄʜɪʀᴀ, ᴄʜɪɢɪʀɪ, ᴋᴜɴɪɢᴀᴍɪ, ɴᴀɢɪ, ʀᴇᴏ, ʙᴀʀᴏᴜ, ʀɪɴ, ʜɪᴏʀɪ, ᴋᴀʀᴀꜱᴜ, ʏᴜᴋɪᴍɪʏᴀ, ᴏᴛᴏʏᴀ

Isagi: Back when he was younger, he had a phase where he would do the dab whenever he scored a goal. It could be completely outdated too and people would cringe at him LMAO. Might’ve also done fortnite dance (he doesn’t even play fortnite). His teammates try to go over and celebrate but he randomly breaks into the orange justice (he can’t even do it properly) so they end up just standing there like 🧍. Let him have his moment I guess???

Bachira: He was one of those kids that played with insects outside or something (speaking from experience) 😭. You’d catch him playing outside and there were 3 worms, each with different names. He probably gave them sad backstories too. The neighbors thought he was weird as hell. If someone pointed it out, he’d be like “Stop being rude to them! They’re my friends!” And he’d actually look pissed off, exactly like this emoji 😠. If he comes back to the same spot only to find that they aren’t there, he’ll come home crying 😭 🙏 Please help him.

Chigiri: He’s canonically a moody guy…I feel like he ‘decides’ his mood for the day ykyk 😭. If it’s a clear sky, sunny day, he’ll choose to be happy but if he wakes up and it’s raining, he decides that he’s gonna be angry. Always ends up breaking character though. If he's laughing and suddenly remembers that he's supposed to be angry, he’ll immediately put on a blank expression again like 😐 and the people around him think they did something wrong LMAOO. Like??? What happened bro???

Kunigami: His go-to pose for photos is the thumbs up or the peace sign and HE LOOKS SO STIFF. He’s just there like 🙂 ✌️. He looks so awkward pls 😭. His little sister is trying so hard not to laugh and he’s just like ???? What's so funny?? If he’s accidentally photo-bombing and realises too late, he’ll strike that EXACT POSE until someone tells him to move cus his brain couldn’t process it ITS SO SAD 😭

Nagi: Once, when he was younger, he tried doing one of those free robux application things where you play a bunch of games for robux and he thought it was legit because some youtuber did it. His parents were like “Seishiro what are you even doing” and he was like “I’m grinding robux mom, you wouldn’t understand” Like Nagi…don’t even get your hopes up 😬. Long story short, it didn’t work and he ended up with some virus on his ipad. He woke his parents up at 3am and was like “um…I think I got hacked ☹️” His parents WERE NOT pleased 😭

Reo: Had a little rebellious phase where he only used cringey Gen Z slang. In front of his parents too and they’d stare at him like 😨. “Zamn ngl this food is bussin’ fr goated no cap,” said young Reo, at a luxurious 5-star restaurant. His mom almost choked on her food. Probably got side-eyed by the waiter too. He didn’t even realise that it wasn’t cool until he found out that NOBODY actually says all that 😭.

Barou: When he’s eating other people's food or eating at a restaurant, he judges it like he’s Gordan Ramsey or something??? Imagine he’s at someone's house for dinner and then when they’re eating he has this whole routine. First he sniffs, feels the texture, then he examines with his eyes, and finally starts eating. You’ll tell if he likes it or not from his expressions 💀 He’ll start interrogating too LMAO. He’d be like “What kind of spice is this?” “How much salt did you add?” HE’S NOT PLAYING YALL.

Rin: Took elementary dodgeball SERIOUSLY. He’d yell at his teammates. Losing? Not on his watch. “WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING?! IT’S DODGE BALL NOT GET HIT IN THE FACE BALL YOU LOSER!”. If he ever lost a game in PE, he’d start crying and throwing a fit, all while blaming his teammates. He would act like an angel if Sae was there though LMAO.

Hiori: He tries to re-enact cool moves from video games. Like if there's a character that has a cool playstyle he’ll literally hop out of his gaming chair just to swing a spatula around 😭. He got the sound effects goin on too, you can hear little pews and booms. Or if there’s a specific voice line from the final boss that he thinks sounds cool he’ll say it out loud (sometimes his parents hear and they think that he’s lost it not that they care though.)

Karasu: He had a huge chess.com phase, probably in middle school. But he was that one kid that goes ‘I wasn’t even trying tho lol’ when he lost (behind the screen he is SCREAMING in rage). ALSO He’s the type to be super expressive (kinda like Barou) 😭. You’ll know when he’s judging you cus’ his face will go 😬 😲 ☹️ 😧 🤔 in that order 💀. He could say something but his expressions reveal all there is.

Yukimiya: When he first got his glasses, he probably forgot them a lot LOL. Like he’d show up to football practice without them and one of his teammates would go “Yo where’s your glasses, Yukki?” and he’d be like…oh yeah. There was probably one point where he thought his eyesight was getting better. He woke up one morning and just decided that he suddenly felt like he had good vision again. It was all in his head 💀.

Otoya: He once tried hitting on a girl when her boyfriend WAS RIGHT THERE and he didn’t even notice. Let’s just say he ran for his life. His older sister has a video recording of it and uses it as blackmail. Worst of all he genuinely thought he could've ‘stolen’ her from him 😭 LIKE OTOYA NO. 😭

[daaziscoolbesties]

minecraft endermen are really weird. theyre unnatural and make me feel off.

when i was a small child like seven years ago i would always play minecraft on creative mode and i made an ugly ass enderman "farm" made out of bricks. i had an enderman spawn egg and id just spam it and the enderman couldnt get out (so i thought). anyways having them in this enclosure was probably so i could feel "powerful" over them because to date theyre still the only mob in minecraft that makes me anxious. even above skeletons(which i used to have a horrible fear of (the real life ones not mc ones)) and spiders (which i still have a horrible fear of (again the real life ones not mc)). anyways the endermen just ended up completely teleporting out of the farm and i checked on my world the next day and they were all gone and i didnt appreciate it (this was the same world where my brother blew up my pets but thats a different story).

anyways back to endermen. besides the fact that i just didnt like dying and i did like building ugly structures, one of the main reasons i didnt play survival much for a while, or if i did id put it on peaceful, was because of the enderman. every time i passed one my heart would drop and if i happened to look it in the eye on accident my throat would feel like its closing up and idk why. if it sounds like im bullshitting you or not remembering correctly i swear im not because it still happens actually.

i play survival a ton more now simply because i enjoy it more, it feels like theres actually a goal to achieve, but i never really make efforts toward said goal(ya know, beating the dragon). none of my worlds are really created with the intention of beating the dragon, and therefore i dont have to worry about endermen. if i happen to be outside my house and theres one there, no worries i just wait for it to go away. it may spook me for a sec but im fine.

but recently me and my sister started a world with the sole purpose of beating the dragon. we may have cheated a little (like putting on keep inventory cause honestly we both suck at pvp and have died so many times) but its okay cause thats it. we still have to fight endermen to get pearls for the end portal. and so we were hanging out in the nether and made a little two block tall hidey hole and id stand by the front and taunt endermen to get them to come close so i could kill them without them being able to get to me and it worked really well actually. except for the fact that to get them to come near i had to get them to aggro onto me and to do that i have to look them in the eye and you know where this is going. and so i was like "it has been so long since i looked an enderman in the eye surely i cant still be scared of them" and i turn to my sister like "<sister> you stay in the hole ill get us some pearls"

so i go out and taunt the dudes and guess what bitch got the pit in their stomach from these fuckers!! thats right bestie and my throat started to close up and i started talking to my sister again but i could tell me voice was off from it and i dont know why it happens but it pisses me off. like theyre not even scary looking theyre just a bit odd. and i continue to do this and kill the endermen and it just. doesnt. stop. my throat keeps closing up and im not "in pain" or anything just inconvenienced like what the fuck dude its a bunch of fucking pixels. i dont know its weird.

and now this part is gonna sound super fuckin stupid but ever since i started watching dsmp i immediately got attached to ranboo (cc! and c!) and knowing that c!ranboo was half enderman made me really think "hm endermen arent that bad. granted i havent interacted with one in a while but still not that bad. perhaps my favorite hostile mob" because you know people get attached to characters and think dumb things. and then again ranboo's character straight up existing and also this one specific headcanon i saw that was like "endermen use telepathy to talk so when a player looks at them all their thoughts get projected into them and it hurts their brain :((" makes me feel kinda bad for aggro-ing them and killing them again even though its literally just some pixels dude. my brain is not kind to me about this stuff and its really dumb.

i dont know what about the endermen staring back at me sets off the sort of fight-or-flight that makes me unable to breathe for a second but its something. its not the fact that their jaws basically unhinge when theyre mad because the throat closing up sensation happens before that. it happens when i look at an enderman and it looks back up at me and holds my gaze. i dont know. i dont know why im worked up(even slightly) over a video game. theyre still my favorite hostile mob i think (not just because of ranboo honestly the other hostile mobs just kinda suck).

and also i like the idea of how humanoid they are. not human. humanoid. they have the basic aspects of a minecraft human- square, head, torso, legs, arms, eyes. most mc skins dont even have mouths anyways just eyes. but the endermen have these features differently than us. their eyes are unnatural, legs and arms too long, body all one color, one that can blend in, and you can only see its purple eyes staring you down from a distance. theyre basically just cryptids.

despite skeletons and even zombies looking closer to the player than the endermen, they still seem the most human-like of all of the mobs. they arent aggressive unless provoked. they dont like eye contact(socially awkward). they like picking up stuff and moving it around. theyre curious (i cant explain this one they just are, okay?). even the sounds they make are just phrases like "hey" "hello" "whats up" distorted and in reverse.

i want to know more about them.

i want to know where they came from.

why theyre found in every dimension.

why they sound like us.

i want explanations, i want to know why they scare us.

i want to know if they know.

if they know that we're like them in some way.

that some of us dont mean harm, but for others thats all they want to do to the endermen.

i saw a post once that said "what taught humans to be wary of things that look human, but arent?" i believe the phenomenon is called uncanny valley. what if in the minecraft universe, the thing that taught us that was endermen. or rather, the thing that taught the endermen that was us? because again, the endermen pose no threat to us unless theyre provoked. by one of us. the endermen try to communicate with us- "⊑⟒⊬" "⍙⊑⏃⏁⌇ ⎍⌿?"- but we kill them without reason. thats why they dont like eye contact, its been ingrained in them through evolution that eye contact with a human/player will end in death, and they dont want it to be theirs, so they attack first.

we- or rather, the first minecrafters, maybe (in the lore(?)) people before the game, taught the endermen to fear us. i mean we literally kill them, use their remains to enter their home dimension, and then kill their leader/mother. they do their best to stop us, but we can respawn and they cant. and then, some people even go as far as to make farms, having them all spawn in one place, crowded, cant teleport out- their only defense mechanism gone- and then are slaughtered for their pearls. and due to the mass of these farms there will be chests upon chests full of pearls that no one's using, i saw someone the other day ask what people do with them and someone straight up said they just burn them like god what a waste.

"but izzy, players make mob farms all the time and not just for endermen!!!1!!11! why are the endermen ones so bad why are you only talking about those1!1!1!!!1" 1) because i can, 2) this is an endermen-themed post, and 3) i dont like the other mobs. and of course im not actually mad at the players who like beating the game and making endermen farms and such, i mean thats what it is its all just a game just a bunch of code, 0's and 1's, so why does it matter why bother writing a whole post on it?

because when you look paste the game, when you read in between those ones and zeroes and discover this non-intentional lore, it can make things so much more,, interesting. this is fanfic material. hell, its probably fanart material too. its all for the content to see what the community can create i guess. or maybe i just really like talking about endermen and this has been on my mind for two days now and once i started typing i couldnt stop.

but yeah, thats my final thoughts.

we, humans, experience uncanny valley about the endermen.

but the endermen experience uncanny valley about the players.

[fantasia-monogram]

As the clock strikes midnight, part 1

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / epilogue

♥️ Taeyang x reader (nonbinary, female anatomy) x Jaeyoon; mentions of other SF9 members

♥️ Suggestive (~2k words); smoking, mentions of alcohol, (lightly) implied BDSM. Mutual pining. Next part is going to be NSFW (and reveal more about the characters’ history).

♥️ You’re a beast at work, having to be tough to climb up the corporate ladder, but what you never thought of is that your attitude might be intimidating to your long time crush. Luckily, your much more laid back friend is here to help... both of you.

♥️ Disclaimer: this is just for fun! I’m not claiming that’s how they are in real life, it’s just my imagination doing whatever it wants. Read at your own discretion.

“Ah, the exciting world of corporate banking.”

You were too tired to check the time, but one look over the room gave you a clear idea of what kind of stage the party has reached: vast office space, with all the desks pushed against the wall and a long table situated in the middle, was littered with barely-sober people, most of them in groups of two or three. The goal was to let coworkers of various titles and positions mingle in a casual manner, as the fairly young company’s hierarchy and employer count was expanding proportionately to its growth - friendly office culture was a staple in this place. Truth was, after a couple drinks (or, in case of some tougher individuals, whole bottles of soju), everyone would group into their regular lunch break cliques, usually within the same department.

Long gone were the days when the business was much smaller, and it was easier for people from different departments to form close bonds.

Luckily, you remembered them very well, and that’s why, as the party was dying down, you shared a (small and not very comfortable) couch with your two best colleagues: Lee Jaeyoon and Yoo Taeyang.

“Look at him. What a fighter,” Jaeyoon said with a hushed voice, pointing his almost full glass of whisky towards another corner of the spacious room. There, behind one of the squished-together desks, Quality Department leader Kim Inseong was still angrily babbling about work-related statistics to the nearly-wasted Training Supervisor, Baek Juho. The latter, with his forehead propped on his hand, kept waving at his superior to stop, as coherent words would not come out of his mouth at this point no matter how hard he tried. Inseong, incredibly professional yet warm and welcoming when sober, would do a total 180° after a single bottle of soju and turn into a snarky bastard ranting at everything going on in the company.

“Supervisor Baek is holding on strong, though,” Taeyang added in a matter-of-fact tone before taking a sip from his glass.

You couldn’t help but cover your mouth and snort with amusement.

The three of you were an unusual group. 

You all joined the company on the same day, and underwent basic training for a couple weeks. Even though Jaeyoon was close to your age, the gap between you and Taeyang was much bigger. Add their impressive height and you had to admit, it was awkward to sit between these two guys every single day. Soon enough though, your small talk during short breaks would turn more and more enjoyable, and when the last week rolled in, as the oldest one, you mustered up the courage to invite them to a nearby coffee shop. Formally, you just wanted to celebrate the end of your training stage, but honestly… You grew fond of them, so there was no harm in getting to know them better away from the workplace.

Who knew the three of you would find common ground during that fateful meeting?

“Hey… Y/n… You there?” Jaeyoon’s voice snapped you out of a trip down the memory lane.

“Yeah. What were you saying?” you asked, a bit embarrassed.

“You don’t seem to be having fun at all. I haven’t seen you around the bar even once,” Jaeyoon ranted, haphazardly shaking his glass.

“You know I don’t drink.”, you stated calmly.

“Aish… It’s a party! No need to be so strict. Am I right?”

For some reason, Jaeyoon looked towards Taeyang with a wicked grin, and you followed. The youngest one, sitting by your right side, cleared his throat theatrically.

“I’ll go get myself another one.” he mumbled, already leaving the couch.

“Don’t overdo it!” Jaeyoon yelled, then turned back to you. “You could really use some percents, though. Just saying.”

“I have an image to maintain,” you said quietly, crossing your arms against your chest.

“You dressed like it’s every other day at work, too,” your friend pointed out, “It’s just a different colour.”

You looked at him resentfully. That’s true, tailored suits were your usual look, not just because you simply didn’t like dresses or skirts. It was the easiest way to elongate your silhouette, and you were already lacking in height compared to all the higher-ups attending company meetings with you.

A powerful look was expected from the Compliance Supervisor who rose to that position in a record-breaking time and was nowhere near done career-wise. 

Besides, you had to admit, your neat suits in a whole variety of colors boosted your confidence every single day. You had all of them adjusted, so they would accentuate your figure in all the right places. Oh, all the times you and Jaeyoon would shamelessly ask poor Taeyang who’s got the best ass out of you two (“Okay, forget it. Taeyangie does,” Jaeyoon would end the competition each time, making Taeyang cringe).

"You're just jealous because I look better in red than you do," you barked, although lacking any real bite. 

"Listen, what I'm trying to say is…" Jaeyoon leaned dangerously close to your ear. "...I don't mind your uniforms, but someone over there is on the brink of losing his mind right now." 

You backed off, wide-eyed. Your friend discreetly threw a glance towards Taeyang, who just came back with his glass refilled. 

Still dumbfounded, you kept looking back and forth at each of your friends, not realizing how silly it must have looked.

"Did I miss anything?" Taeyang asked, clearly feeling something went down during his absence. 

"Yeah, I just said that maybe we should leave this remnant of a party and move somewhere else," Jaeyoon replied, looking over your shoulder at the youngest. 

You furrowed your eyebrows, but ultimately decided his idea wasn't that bad after all. 

"I don't know… Wouldn't it be rude to leave so early?" Taeyang mused. 

"Seokwoo left, like, at 9," Jaeyoon pointed out. "Way before anybody had a chance to get drunk." 

"Ah, our lovely Escalation Specialist," you sighed, talking about Kim Seokwoo, your right hand man at the Compliance Department. "You could say the party escalated too much for him."

"At nine!", the older of your friends laughed. 

“What time is it anyway?” you asked. It didn’t matter that you could just check it yourself. You were used to people doing things like this for you around this place.

Jaeyoon, who knew it very well, fished his phone out of his shirt pocket.

“Uh… Fifteen to twelve,” he announced.

Taeyang tapped your shoulder. 

"Happy early birthday," he threw casually. 

Pleasant warmth rose to your cheeks. You were just starting to smile, your eyes crinkling already, when Jaeyoon jumped in his seat, startling both of you. 

"Wait, what?!" he yelled, making a few heads turn for a second or two. 

"What kind of a friend are you, really?" Taeyang snorted dryly, "It's y/n's birthday tomorrow." 

Jaeyoon let out a sound that could best be described as a happy roar and pounced forward in an attempt to give you a bear hug. You dodged it by moving backwards, thus colliding into Taeyang's side. 

You briefly glanced at each other, awkwardly nodding as an apology, before he uttered a quick it's fine and slid further into the couch. 

"Hey, that hug was supposed to be a present!" Jaeyoon whined, recovering his dignity after the failure. 

"Thanks, but no, thanks." you retorted, staying at a safe distance.

"Okay, but now we really have to go somewhere else. This calls for a celebration!" Your overly enthusiastic companion wasn't giving up that easily.

You turned to your other friend. 

"Taeyang?"

"That's enough social interaction for today," the boy in question replied, "One more crowded place and I'll pass out on the spot." 

He was known for his introverted tendencies; even at work, he occupied a desk that was a bit further from everyone else, guaranteeing him all the peace he needed, and had only one coworker he was somewhat close to apart from you two. 

"What about we go to my place instead? I've got no alcohol, but there are plenty of leftovers for a late dinner if you're hungry," you offered instead. 

"Sounds like a plan!" Jaeyoon clasped his hands. "I'll pay for the cab." 

Taeyang bottomed out his glass. 

"Wanna go for a smoke while we wait?"

As soon as you put a cigarette in your mouth, Taeyang was there to light it. You could swear his eyes lingered on your lips, but maybe it was so late that your eyes started pulling tricks on you. 

A good five minutes passed of the three of you smoking in silence, enjoying the cool summer breeze and the sight of a nearly full moon above you. Taeyang was the first to finish, with you following. Jaeyoon was the last to end his cigarette, throwing it into the trash can nearby in a somewhat angry manner. 

"Taeyang, I can't possibly imagine a better time to tell them than now."

Both you and Taeyang turned your heads towards Jaeyoon.

"Tell what?" you posed a question, confused. 

The guys exchanged looks. After that, Taeyang averted his eyes, while Jaeyoon locked his with yours. 

"I think he should be the one to explain." Jaeyoon stated firmly. 

"It's fine," Taeyang's voice was unexpectedly weak, "I'm fine with you telling them." 

You felt your heartbeat quicken all of sudden. 

"He's head over heels for you." 

And then, it was as if your heart just stopped. No, that couldn't be. Your pretty, soft spoken dongsaeng you always had your eyes on? In love with you?

"No way." you muttered, turning to face Taeyang. He still couldn't bear to look at you. "Is that true?" 

Internally, you were screaming for him to say yes. 

Poor guy seemed like he was about to get a panic attack, breathing in and out loudly, hands balled into fists. You could see him biting his lips.

"Come on." Jaeyoon ushered, "I did the hard part for you. Now it's your turn." 

Taeyang slowly raised his gaze. His doll-like eyes were glazed over with tears - a sight so stunning it almost made you gasp. 

"It's true. It's been going on for more than two years now." His voice was quiet, but steady.

You kept staring at his gorgeous, flushed face, unable to say a word. It was a clue for him to continue. 

"I knew I had a chance. I'm not stupid. I noticed you treated me differently than Jaeyoon or any other friend at work. But I also knew your no relationships at the workplace policy and your attitude towards age gaps, and decided to keep it to myself." 

Your heart was about to burst. 

"I'm just as demanding in love as I am at work," you explained, "I'd ruin you."

Jaeyoon circled you. As soon as he stopped, he put his left hand on Taeyang's shoulder, while his right on yours. 

"Tell them," he encouraged the younger guy again. 

As if on command, there was fire burning in Taeyang's gaze. You felt it consume you as a whole.

"I'm not fragile," the boy declared, “I want to be ruined.”

You thought you were dreaming, but a squeeze of Jaeyoon’s hand on your shoulder anchored you back to reality, this reality being your crush at first sight confessing to you.

“Your confidence… How strict and relentless you are…” Taeyang went on, his voice breaking, “The tone of your voice… And your suits. Oh, your suits. It all turns me on so much.”

“What a guy,” Jaeyoon chuckled, shaking his head.

Both you and Taeyang decided to ignore him for now.

“I repeat,” Taeyang insisted, “I want to be ruined.”

Despite Jaeyoon’s continuous hold on both of you, you reached towards Taeyang’s face to caress his smooth cheeks with the back of your fingers. That was all he needed to surge forward and plant a brief, fluttering kiss on your lips that still managed to leave you with your head spinning, needing more.

“Happy birthday, y/n,” Taeyang whispered, holding his forehead against yours.

It was only then when you realized you were both breathing heavily, even though nothing had happened yet.

The moment was interrupted by the ringtone of Jaeyoon’s phone. At last, the guy ceased his hold on you to check the device.

“Okay, lovebirds, the cab is here. It’s gonna be a fun night.”

You glanced at Jaeyoon, then locked your eyes with Taeyang’s again. He reciprocated your devious smile.

(to be continued)

[viastro]

tastes like cola | lee jihoon

ミ★ synopsis: in which you force jihoon to be your fake boyfriend in order to finally beat your cousin at something.

ミ★ genre: fake dating!au, humor, fluff

ミ★ warnings: none!

ミ★ word count: 2,250

ミ★ pairings: jihoon x female reader

ミ★ notes: this one is dedicated to my luvie @urlocalcaratclown​ !! don’t think i forgot you mentioning this is one of your favorite prompts >:D i hope you like this one lucy <3

“Absolutely not.”

“But Jihoon!” He lets out an exasperated sigh, stepping out of the kitchen to go into his studio. You trail after him like a lost puppy, planning not to leave him alone until he says yes.

“Yn I said no. I’m not going to pretend to be your boyfriend just to prove to your cousin that you can, in fact, find someone who’d want to date you!” You press a hand to your heart, ego slightly deflating at the comment, but you choose to ignore it. “Pleaseeee?”

“No.” You run up so that you’re in front of him, stopping him from walking. He glares at you, and you give him the best puppy eyes you can muster.

“I will literally buy you cola whenever you want for the rest of the year if you do this for me.” He raises an eyebrow at the offer, and you internally smirk. 

“... I’m listening.”

“I just need you to go on one double date with her and her boyfriend. She’s been making fun of me for so long, we have this eternal competition that we’ve never actually vocalized, but I swear it’s a thing.” Jihoon blinks at you, and you give him a big smile.

“So will you do it?” He stares at you for a moment, watching the way your nose scrunches up as you await his answer. 

Cute. 

“Make it cola and kbbq and you got yourself a deal.” You scowl at the addition to the original offer, but still outstretch your hand towards Jihoon. 

“Alright, deal.” Jihoon grins, softly shaking your hand. 

“Now can you come sing background vocals for the song I’m making for my class?” Rolling your eyes, you nod, stepping out of the way so that the two of you can walk to his studio room.

“Should we run through it again?” Jihoon nudges you, giving you a smile in an attempt to offer some reassurance. “We absolutely do not need to run through it again. I’m very sure that we have our first date story memorized yn.”

You nervously bite your lip as the sight of the arcade draws nearer with each step you and Jihoon take. Your cousin has practically made everything between the two of you a competition since you were kids. If you got a dollhouse? She’d beg her parents to get a mansion for her dolls. You decided to grow out your hair? She grew hers longer. You were a cheerleader? She became the cheerleading captain. You lift a hand up to your mouth, about to nibble on your nails when Jihoon reaches up and takes it. He lets your hand fall, and intertwines your fingers with his.

Your eyes widen, and you turn to look at your pretend boyfriend, who is looking at anything but you. “J-Ji?”

“You gotta break that nail biting habit of yours when you're nervous. It’ll all work out yn, and besides, the arcade is like two steps away and it’d be weird if we walked in without holding hands.” You stare at him for a moment, before letting out a breath and looking forward again. 

stop falling for him you absolute buffoon, you think to yourself as your face gets warmer. Jihoon is biting back the smile from breaking out onto his face, trying not to focus on how your hand seems to just… fit.

He opens the door for the two of you once you reach the arcade, and you step in. Immediately the feeling of dread hits you when your cousin turns around and smiles at you. “Yn!” 

“Hi Mina.” You greet, lack of enthusiasm really showing that even Jihoon picks up on it. You let go of his hand to return the hug she gives you. He muffles down a chuckle when Mina turns to him, an indecipherable look appearing before she changes it back to a happy expression. “Yn, is this your friend?”

“He’s actually my-”

“I’m her boyfriend, Jihoon. It’s nice to meet you.” Jihoon interrupts, stepping over and holding your hand once again. Mina’s eyes practically bulge out of her head as she glances between the two of you. 

“N-no way..” She mumbles as she takes the chance to quickly do a onceover of Jihoon. His blonde hair is parted to the side, showing off his forehead and strong eyebrows. He’s wearing a simple white shirt and black jeans, slightly revealing his muscles. 

“Where’s your boyfriend?” You ask, snapping your cousin out of her drool fest. She lets out a grin, turning around right as a tall guy walks over. He wraps his arm around her, giving you a kind smile. 

“Bong-pal, this is my cousin yn and her boyfriend Jihoon.” He extends his hand out to shake, and you outstretch yours, eyes widening at the firm grip he’s got. “Nice to meet you guys.” 

“Should we go play some games?” He asks, and the three of you nod. 

“Well it’d be strange if we came to an arcade just to stand in the lobby.” You joke, to which Bong-pal laughs. Mina’s eye twitches, and she turns to you. “Wanna play basketball?” 

Your competitive fire ignites in your chest when you see the glint in your cousin’s eye, so you let out a small smile. 

“Sure.”

oh god here we go… Jihoon thinks to himself once you turn away from Mina, catching sight of the furrow to your brows.

“Fuck yeah!” Mina shouts once she gets another point in air hockey, and you clutch the striker tightly in your hand. The two of you have been competing in multiple different arcade games for the past two hours. You’ve won three out of the five games, while Mina has won two. Her poor boyfriend just walked off to play other games by himself because it was clear Mina had one goal and one goal only. 

Jihoon reaches out and rests his hand on top of yours, causing you to turn to look at him, snapping out of your thoughts. Your features immediately soften when he gives you a reassuring grin.

“Try and relax yn, you’re literally clutching the paddle so hard your knuckles were white.” You let out a sigh, and he pats your head with a grin. Mina raises an eyebrow at the gesture, turning to find Bong-pal sitting at one of the racing games. She glares, looking back towards you and Jihoon. 

they seem more on the friendly side than the romantic side, Mina thinks to herself as she stares at the two of you. It’s like a lightbulb goes off in her head when she comes up with the idea that the two of you might not actually be dating. 

“Ji, what do you like about my dear cousin?” Mina suddenly asks, and Jihoon freezes. You curse to yourself when you remember that you and Jihoon didn’t practice any answers for that type of question.

“Where did we meet?” You ask a tired Jihoon. He lets out a yawn, leaning farther back into the couch. He closes his eyes, releasing a sigh.

“At uni.”

“Who asked who out?” 

“I asked you out because you were too scared to make a move.”

“How long have we been dating?” Jihoon opens one eye to glance at you, seeing the determined look on your face. He smiles at the sight, finding it ridiculous how passionate you are about a fake relationship.

“Two months now.”

“When did you ask me out?” 

“May 27.”

“Perfect.”

“I, uh. I-” Mina smirks, and you feel your heart drop into your asshole when you realize she might be onto your guys’ act. You let out a breath, about to open your mouth to try and change the subject.

“I like how determined she is. When she has her mind set on something, she does whatever it takes to achieve that goal. Even if there’s a lot of bumps along the way, she still perseveres.” Your mouth drops open at the honesty in Jihoon’s voice, warmth rising to your cheeks as he stares at the puck.

“She’s really funny, sweet, and most of all, she’s kind. When we first met,” Jihoon lets out a small chuckle at the memory. “I was really tired that day because I stayed up writing a song the night before. I wasn’t looking where I was going, and I ended up bumping into her, spilling my coffee onto her white shirt. Yet she was the one who kept profusely apologizing to me, offering to get me a new cup of coffee and explaining how clumsy she is.” 

Jihoon turns to look at you, letting out a small smile when his eyes lock with yours. “I’d do anything for her, even go on a double date with people I don’t know.” You cough into your elbow, trying to will away the warmth in your cheeks. Mina blinks once Jihoon finishes, looking down at her hands clutching the striker. 

“Sounds like you really like yn, huh?” She asks, and he nods. 

“Yeah, guess I do.” Jihoon mumbles, quiet enough that you almost don’t catch it, but you do. Your heartbeat is fast and loud against your ears, smile breaking out onto your face. 

Mina coughs, taking a sip of water. “Let’s start playing again, shall we?” 

“Well, it was nice meeting you Jihoon. Great seeing you too cuz.” Mina says, forcing out a laugh as she gives you a hug. You give her a genuine smile, and Jihoon chuckles about it, knowing that you’re only happy because you beat Mina at air hockey.

“It was great meeting you Bong-pal. I’ll see you at the next family dinner Mina!” You and Jihoon wave at the two, turning around to leave when your cousin stops you.

“Wait! Let me take a picture of you guys.” You and Jihoon pause, slowly turning around to see Mina already holding up her phone towards the two of you. You let out an awkward chuckle, getting ready to pose with Jihoon so that the two of you can fucking leave. 

“No be cuter!” Mina whines, and your eye twitches. There’s slight tension between you and Jihoon after he literally poured his heart out about what he loves about you, so now you just want to go home so the two of you can talk it out.

“Is this not cute?” Jihoon asks, arm wrapped around your waist. Mnia shakes her head, giving the two of you a devilish smile.

“Kiss!” You choke on your saliva while Jihoon turns into literal stone right beside you. Your cousin tilts her head to the side at your reactions, feeling satisfied that she’s almost caught you in your lie. She smirks, “Why? Is something the matter? I thought you guys were dating.”

“Nothing wrong! I’ll kiss my boyfriend.” You state, and Jihoon looks at you with wide eyes as you turn to face him. He mouths the words, are you sure? when he tentatively places his hands on your waist. In return, you give him a nervous smile, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck. The two of you stare at each other for a moment, before you close your eyes and press your lips to his.

Jihoon squeezes your waist, feeling his heart practically burst into butterflies at the feeling of you kissing him. He pulls you a bit closer, and you’re so caught up in the fact that his lips are soft and taste like cola due to his obsession, that you’re unable to hear Mina saying she took the picture.

“Uh, yn.”

“Yn.”

“YN!” You and Jihoon jump away from each other, turning towards your annoyed cousin and her amused boyfriend. Mina taps her phone, telling you to turn on your airdrop. Once you do, she airdrops the photos, before bidding goodbye again. Once her and Bong-pal walk out of the arcade, you and Jihoon slowly turn towards each other. 

His eyes trail down to your mouth, taking note of your lips being more swollen than before. While you also stare at his, noticing of his lips being a bit pinker than before.

“Let’s get out of here.” You mumble, turning around and walking out before Jihoon can get a word in. He grins, following after you. 

“Hey!” You continue to walk, pretending to not hear him calling you.

“Yn!” 

“Yn~” Jihoon rolls his eyes, walking a bit faster so that he’s now standing in front of you. “Oh Ji, I didn’t hear you.” 

“Yeah, yeah.” You open your mouth to protest but he shoots you a look, immediately making you back down. 

“You promised to buy me kbbq whenever I asked.” Jihoon says, smirking at you when your timid expression turns into a glare. You let out a sigh, “Fine, fine. I’ll buy you kbbq.”

The two of you begin walking in the opposite direction in a tense silence. Well, the tension mainly comes from you as you are unsure of what to say now that you and Jihoon have kissed and you really wanna do it again. You’re snapped out of your thoughts when Jihoon slips your hand into his, letting out a content smile when he’s reminded of how well they fit. 

“We can talk about it when we eat.” He says softly, giving your hand a squeeze. A small smile escapes you, realizing that today was quite a success. 

i guess my fake relationship will turn into something real.

[zhonglishrine]

Can i have a oneshot for gogol comforting his crying s/o?

Pairing: Nikolai Gogol x Reader Word Counts: 2.3k Note: Hello anon! Please forgive me for taking a long time to do your request! Since it was the first request on my blog, I thought I wanted to make it special. But I was stuck with writer’s block. So I used my old work before and re-edit it instead so it will be slightly different to match with the request! I’m sorry and I hope you will enjoy it and special big thanks to @soukokuwu​ for helping me proofread this one! Really, thank you so muchhhh <3!!!

It was empty.

In this dark cold continent, there was nothing but void and darkness inside. You either existed or your mind was playing a trick on you. It felt like a grand illusion - that nothing was real. What you were searching for was not there. Nothing you did would ever make you feel complete in any sense. There was always this feeling that haunted you, always reminding you of how miserable and disgusting you were. Gnawed and woven to your very soul like wild ivy tendrils wrapping around your empty heart and kept whispering down to the deepest recesses of your mind.

You were a monster.

You were a demon.

You were a human with no heart.

You were no different than a dead soul.

Then, why were you still alive?

For what purpose were you even here?

You shut your eyes tightly. You wanted to scream and block every deafening sound that suffocated you in this insufferable world. It exacerbated and tightened in your chest the more you struggled. Had it not been your sanity that kept you sane, you would already be consumed by madness. But would it be better if you just let yourself loose? Let it take over and become nothing but a shell of a living monster? Would it be better just to let what remains of you and burn it into a fire of anguish and let it turn to ash? Let it destroy you with the spite and hatred you harbor towards everything?

You were desperate to reach for something.

Anything.

And that was when he came along, when you were at a loss, as though he knew.

"Would you like to join the Decay of Angels?" He had said, with eyes as vacant as yours, but his hypnotizing violet eyes beneath that moonlight was much deeper and darker. It feels like you would lose yourself and drown in it if you were to stare any longer. Yet without exchanging any further words, he seemed to understand the unspoken pain that has festered through your being at that very moment. You looked exactly like a lost child that desperately needed guidance, that needed to cling onto something.

"...What will I get if I join you?"

"You will be free. From your sins."

That was what he had offered. His soothing, saintly voice was like a remedy that could mend your broken soul that needed salvation, which had been beyond redemption at that point. You had nothing to lose and thus accepted his invitation back then, with a little hope thinking something might change. But after so many years, it still remained the same. You were still the same old you. No matter how much you wanted to pretend, you could never fake a smile and pretend to be happy. It felt like it would be hypocritical- like it would only make you lose sight of yourself even more.

Then, what is it that you were searching for, actually?

Why were you still here?

A soft sigh escaped your chapped lips as you stared long at the night sky above. The stars twinkled, a million light-years away from the orbit. Yet you still reached out your hand, as if attempting to pick one and keep it in your pocket in a futile endeavor.

"A beautiful night, isn't it?" a familiar voice chirped, interrupting your time alone. You were never one that liked the companionship of others, but even so, no matter how hard you tried to ignore him, he'd just pester you even more and pop out randomly, much to your distaste. He was the last member of the Decay of Angels that you would want to interact with.

"Why are you here?"

"Aww, don't be so cold with me~! I merely passed by and just wanted to say hello to you~" Gogol winked and gave you a finger gun, as though his intentions weren't obvious.

"Bother someone else."

"Ah, are you upset that I'm not Dos?" He smirked as he guessed that.

You felt that he could easily read right through you and you didn’t like it - the feeling of being exposed. Fyodor was a man of mystery, a puzzle that you couldn't solve. You thought of him as someone who understood you and despite the terror associated with his name, he was still someone that you respected profoundly. Not out of fear, but maybe, admiration. But you hated that Gogol was right. You wished you were talking to Fyodor instead of the clown, and Gogol had gotten it right on the nose. And yet here you two were, with different circumstances that bring you two to join the association, even with different goals.

"Shut up. Just leave me alone, will you?"

"Aw... but no one wants to play with me. Even Sigma is busy. But you have been doing nothing but stargazing~ Don't you get tired doing that every night? If it were me, I'd die of boredom!" He flailed his arms in an attempt to get your attention. You cursed under your breath. This clown was too energetic for you to handle.

"None of your business what I do." You replied back to him crudely. But he took a seat beside you anyway, sitting by the edge of the building and swinging his legs back and forth with those comical pointy shoes of his. For someone his age, he acted rather childishly. Though, maybe that's just one of his antics as a clown. But he was the epitome of someone you could never understand. Since you can ever be two-faced like he is.

Gogol hummed. "You always come here, why is that?"

"I told you; it's none of your business."

"Aw. Here I thought that we were friends~" Gogol made it sound like he was hurt by your words.

You ruefully snorted at that, "Funny hearing that coming from you." Did he think you were that naive? Naive enough to think that you two were friends in this organization that was solely established with terrorists that can backstab you at any given moment?

"Is it not right? You've been with us for years, yet you seem so distant. Just like the stars." He remarked while spreading out his left arm to the sky.

"Is that so?" You looked up at it again, attempting to count the innumerable stars, albeit knowing how futile it was.

"Say... why did you join the Decay of Angels?" You posed the question to him, though you weren’t really curious. You just needed something to fill the awkward silence.

"Why, indeed. If I must answer that, why don't you tell me your reason first?"

Reason. You were still unsure about it yet. Why? You had killed so many just for that answer alone but the book that was your mind still drew a blank. Nothing was written on it yet. Was it because you were drawn to Fyodor's words at that time? Had he lured you in with nothing but empty promises?

"Perhaps… I was searching for the meaning of my existence." You curtly answered, but your mind still pondered on it.

"Then, have you found it?" Gogol asked, evincing interest to know as he turned to look at you sideways. There was something between you, something that somehow made you feel connected to him. Both of you were pawns that would soon be disposed of once you have served your purpose. It didn’t scare you, though. You would do what you had to, even if that meant dying in the end. The only thing you were scared of is regret - of not finding what you were searching for in the first place.

"...I don't know. Maybe not yet. Maybe I never will." You said, feigning nonchalance. "Then, what about you?" Now it was your turn to look into his molten gold eye, the one scarred with a vertical cut. Was there a story behind it? You wonder inwardly, but you couldn’t bring yourself to ask Gogol about it. In the Decay of Angels, every member came from a different background and it was unknown what they did before. If you asked him he might tell, either in a jesting manner or make it overly complicated, like another riddle you had to solve.

"I search for my freedom. Just like a bird that soars the skies without being bound by anything," he replied with a wistful tone and his expression softened, "I am seeking for a perfect freedom, like that."

"Freedom, huh..." You repeated, "you're one strange guy." Indeed, he was. Nikolai Gogol was an enigma himself, just as Fyodor was. As though he was standing between the bridge of psychosis and rationality that he wants to get rid of. You failed at understanding his essence, but you could empathize with his pursuit.

"Funny hearing that coming from you~" He retorted with your earlier words. "But birds and stars, are they not so different?"

"How so? They are two different entities, to start with."

"Because both are up far in the sky, seemingly unreachable for a mortal like us. Even so, we still gaze at them longingly, wishing upon the star, wishing to fly, wishing to escape from this warm, wet hell."

You couldn’t refute that. Technically, he wasn’t wrong.

"Then, have you found it?"

Gogol looked at you again, his eye reflecting every little light in the world that you see. He softened his countenance as if he actually understood what lay within your heart that you tried to conceal.

"Maybe I do. Now that I met you."

Within the span of a second that felt like an eternity, your heart thumped loudly in your ribcage, like he took your breath away at that moment with his gaze alone.

No...

Don't fall for it.

Don't fall for it again.

It would be the same. He would just be like the others. He too, would leave once he saw what was inside - that which was hiding and cloaking you in the darkness, that which enshrouded and imprisoned you inside.

And just like he said, you were exactly like the stars.

You were in front of him, and yet you felt so distant and too far away to reach.

"...It's nice talking to you. But I must take my leave now..." You wanted to withdraw yourself before you started to harbor hope and belief in someone again. Before you fell for it again, only to be tripped afterward. Only to be deceived, left broken, and uncared for years.

But he held you back by your wrist.

"Won't you stay a little while longer, my dove? A star will one day perish, and I would feel so lonely if you are truly gone." His voice somehow pulls the strings of your heart. But you know better than to fall for him.

"Wouldn't it be better? You don't know who I am..." You tried to break free, yet he was stubborn, he didn’t want to let you go. "I am not what you think I am... I'm just another monster who has no heart. You shouldn't get close to me..." Your eyes were already starting to well up with hot tears. The stinging pain in your chest throbbed, each passing second with him made you feel suffocated, as though causing you to drown in your own misery. Inevitable it was that you would bring him down with you as well.

"...Or else, you would destroy yourself too," you warned him,

"You’re either human or you are not, either you are a monster with no heart or not, what difference does it make?" He questioned you back, "Be whatever you want to be. It's your freedom, it’s your life, it’s your call."

"It's easy for you to say that... I'm not like you."

"Then tell me, what do you wish for every time you look at the stars? Have you no will for yourself? Have you not wished to break free from your cage as well?"

"I..." Stumped with his questions, you gazed into his eye once again, tears blurring your vision. Everything that was pent up inside you until this moment felt like it was crumbling, disintegrating into dust. Like waves crashing against the sand, such brittle was your resolution now when faced with his raw, naked, and pure emotions when he took off his clown mask.

"I want to... I just want to escape from this place... from my demons..." You said with a trembling, shaky voice, all the remaining strength in you threatening to leave the more you looked into his eyes. What kind of pain does he hide behind them? Why did it hurt you as much as well? As ironic as it sounded, in this moment, he looked more human than you were.

"Then, I will be the one that frees you from it now, my dove. Go, fly to the stars as you wish." He said and held you near, and contrary to his words that coached you to be free, he actually looked like he never wanted to let you go, yet you felt strangely safe and found warmth in his arms. You felt like you were finally being liberated from that which imprisoned you in that bottomless darkness. Even if what you see is just a glimpse of light. Then, that should be enough rather than nothing at all.

"You are beautiful when you soar free that way."

Two humans. Two monsters. Two beating broken hearts.

Under that starry night that illuminated the sky with constellations, it's like your fate entwined and mirrored each other on how almost tragically similar it was, with the demons that were trapped inside the both of you, seeking solace in each other's existence to remind you that you two were still human beings that just wished to be free.

[laukora1030]

Captain America: The First Avenger pt. 2

First off, spoilers if you’ve never seen the movies and you want to. And, english IS NOT my first language, so excuse me if I make mistakes.

Y’all, this specific scene reminds me of that scene where Elastigirl is trapped in all those doors and she kicks the guys’ asses. Like, tell me you saw Steve hitting this guy’s head with the door and your mind didn’t immediately take you to Elastigirl. Or was it only me? Just me? Ok, let’s keep on going.

Nvm, I found out why it reminds me so much of that scene. They’re dressed the same way!

Can we acknowledge how awkward Steve’s interaction with the imprisoned soldiers is? Who told him it was a good idea to say “I’m Captain America” to these people? Although fair, he did get them out rather quickly and he is technically Captain America, but I don’t know, it’s weird. Steeb, you liar, you haven’t knocked Hitler out at all.

I love Steve’s loyalty to Bucky. It gets annoying in the next movies, but in this movie it just shows me how alone Steve was and how important Bucky was to him, because when you have very little people who care for you, your instincts will always be to protect them. 

I love the soldiers just wrecking havoc outside. It’s a fun scene seeing them fight back and use HYDRA’s weapons. How much property do you think they destroyed? Because I keep on wondering, did this act of rebellion from Steeb help turn the tide just a little bit?

There is a similarity between Red Skull and future Steve, and that is that, when they believe there is something more important than anything else, they are willing to sacrifice everyone and everything else for that. In this case, Schmidt was ready to destroy the entire base when he realized he was not going to win, just to save the studies, and future Steve was ready to endanger thousands of people to end HYDRA (CATWS), and to save Bucky (CACW). 

I feel sad for Bucky. He was tortured back in the 40s, then for 70 years, and then he died and came back to life, how does one survive that? He is one strong man, but I just, his entire life saddens me.

I wonder what Bucky thought after he heard Red Skull call Steve Captain America. I would find it hilarious, even in that situation, but that’s just my weird ass talking. Why did Schmidt think he was Erskine’s greatest success when he looks red and Steve looks like this:

America, explain.

Another note to self: Schmidt is a bitch, but I love his car and I would go back in time to the 40s to steal it. 

Bucky is so brave, though. He was tortured, experimented on, completely weak, and still, he put on a brave face and crossed that thing (I have no idea what they’re called) at a steady face, knowing that it could have fallen way before it did. Thanks to the Russo’s I had forgotten how much I loved Bucky Barnes. He is a great character. 

Let’s talk about how pure of heart, dumb of ass Steve is. He had no idea he was gonna survive his little stunt jump, yet he did it with little hesitation because “I have to get my friend out of here”. Pure of heart, dumb of ass. 

I can’t begin to imagine Peggy’s pain when she heard Phillips say that Steve was dead. Especially because if he was dead it would most definitely mean she would have no protection against whatever punishment Phillips saw fit for her actions. And yet she just won’t back down, because she knew she did the right thing. 

The scene where Steve gets back with the 107th is such a great scene, because it shows exactly what Steve is made of. He has a strong mindset, he will fight for what he believes in, and he would do anything for others. It’s a powerful scene.

I wonder if Steve unconsciously wanted the praise he got at that moment. He was the small guy his entire life, the one who was beat and punched on a daily basis, and for once in his life he was being praised for something he thought he deserved. I think that deep down this is exactly what he wanted: recognition.

I wonder if Bucky’s face when Steve stopped looking at him was because he thought he lost his friend, because he was jealous, or because he thought he wasn’t needed anymore. Bucky and Steve grew up together, and when you see a friend you’ve always helped become something better when you’re not with them, I think that can seriously mess you up, especially if you feel like they don’t need you anymore, because, after all, they thrived after you left. I don’t believe he was that jealous, though. Yeah, he used to be the strong guy girls would look at, and now he wasn’t, but I’m inclined to believe it’s my third option. He was so used to going around saving Steve from his death wish (that’s what I call it, because I’m still surprised he survived all those years getting punched), that now he sees Steve save him and save everyone else, and he knows that, were Steve asked to go alone to a fight, he would not be able to do anything. 

Steeb, you lil’ bitch, I know you don’t like cameras and stages, but that’s a medal of valour, I think it’s very important. 

Can we talk about how hot Steve Rogers looks with his army suit? Because he does. Also, as I’ve said before, he ain’t dumb, so, if everything got enhaced with the serum, he must definitely had his intelligence amplified, and I like to believe that he has photographic memory, that’s why he could remember the map he saw when he saved Bucky. 

I’m sorry, but what the fuck Steve? Who gave you permission to look like this?

(You’re welcome)

I like his team. Steve was always a good leader (I’m not even gonna touch CACW), he knew who to trust and who to take with him. Besides, like I said before, he is a great strategist. I think that’s what makes him such a great leader. 

I guess I get why y’all ship Stucky. I don’t ship them, I love their friendship (once again, I’m not even gonna touch CACW with a ten miles pole), and I think they’re sweet, so  I guess I can understand the ship.

Peggy Carter in a red dress is all I never knew I needed. She looks like a queen that will definitely punch you in the face if you deserve it. 

I love the bar scene. The music is lovely, Bucky’s awkwardness is hilarious, Steeb and Peggy flirting is sweet as heck, and Bucky’s “I’m invisible. I’m turning into you, it’s like a horrible dream” it’s the perfect dialogue. 

Okay, how did Howard get all of that glass on his face and didn’t get more than one single cut? Is he stronger than he looks or is it just movie magic? I guess we’ll never know. 

Awkward Steeb is lovely as heck. But I don’t like the blonde. I guess it’s because I am not a fan of stolen kisses, I feel they would make someone uncomfortable. 

Note to self: finally, a movie in sepia tones that isn’t situated in Mexico!

Coming back to the movie: the whole scene with the blonde woman is so freaking awkward. It was totally unnecessary. Like yeah, I get it was to show a jealous Peggy, but ugh, I hate it. Steeb looks son out of his element, it gives me that je ne sais quoi.

Note to self, again: if I ever want to date a woman, make sure not to talk to them the way Steeb did when talking about Peggy and Stark. Steeb, you idiot. 

Gotta go back on track. 

Stark said

The scene where Peggy shoots Steve’s shield used to make me laugh so hard when I was younger. Now it makes me irrationally angry. Peggy more so than anyone should know that bullets ricochet, she was lucky she that the bullets didn’t hit someone else after hitting the shield and just fell to the floor. 

Three things about the different scenes after this last one, the one where Steve and the Howling Commandos raid all HYDRA and Nazi bases they can: Steve looks so cool on his suit, I love Red Skull’s car, and the Howling Commandos are amazing. 

This is still sweet:

Bucky Barnes with a rifle could kill me any day, thank you. Also, I love this scene, it’s such an emblematic CA scene:

Oh oh, the train scene’s coming up next. What do I do now? Do I watch it, do I cry, do I suffer in silence (evidently no)? I was not prepared for this. I regret all my decisions up till this moment.

I’m never gonna get tired of saying that Steve is an amazing strategist. Just so y’all know, if it was me over the train, I would’ve already fallen to my inevitable death. Is it already clear enough that I love James Barnes more than I probably should? No? Then excuse me while I scream into the void aout how much I love this man. Also, him with short hair? 100/10 would recommend again. 

I love how battered (I think I used the right word) Steve’s shield is. It’s a representation of his battles and it’s, I don’t know, it’s calling me. I guess I love when something shows everything they’ve gone through.

Ahhhhhh, THAT part is coming and I’m not ready!!!!! James Barnes, if you read this, I love you. It’s a painful scene to watch, if I’m being honest. Steve loves this man, in my opinion, as a brother, and seeing him at death’s door, you can see the pain on their expressions, one knows they’re gonna die, and the other one knows they’re gonna lose their brother. I don’t think I’d be the same person if that happened to me. And Steve’s cries, bitch, my heart.

That killed me, sorry. 

I still admire Zola’s intelligence, and his sneakiness with the whole SHIELDRA thing. Like, I hate that bitch and I hope he died a very painful death, but he is a great character and I enjoy his scenes. 

Who eats steak with milk? I just wanna know, find me behind the Denny’s. 

I like the whole Zola and phillips scene, it makes sense, because of course he’d want to live. But tell me how you look at someone in the eyes and expect them to believe some bullshit about gods and infinite power? At least Phillip took the whole “his goal is everything” comment, because I sure as hell wouldn’t’ve. 

Red Skull’s little speech about the Valkyrie is okay, I guess, but he mentions something that reminded me strongly of CATWS. He said “If they shoot down one plane, hundreds more will rain fire upon them.” I’m just thinking about the Helicarriers that were supposed to just, ya know, kill everyone that posed a threat to HYDRA. I think it’s a good parallel. 

Note to self, again: I’m not gonna get tired of asking who was the idiot who decided to name this division HYDRA, made their slogan “if they cut off one head, two more shall take its place” then had their logo be an octopus without two extremities. Who do I have to fight?

I love the scene where everyone is screaming Hail HYDRA, because it shows you that, like Steve, Schmidt has presence, and a powerful voice, and he knows how to make people share his ideals. I enjoy it very much.

I feel sorry for Steve. I, listening to him talk to Peggy when he clearly has been crying, telling her that he cannot get drunk, which means that he’s tried it already, it’s a painful scene to watch. Chris Evans is such an amazing actor. He can emulate feelings so easily. Seeing him cry and suffer, God, it pains my heart. I honestly didn’t remember this scene, and to watch it without warning, well, it made me sadder than Bucky’s actual death.

“I’m not gonna stop until ol of HYDRA is dead or captured.” Brings a new light to CATWS for me, what about you?

I will leave it here, mostly because this shit is getting longer than I expected it to be. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy this as much as I did. See you tomorrow.

[old-hyper-super-clover]

Squeeze that bunny tail!

Part 2

Description: The RAD student council as well as the exchange students help out at a bar where, oops, the staff´s dress codes are those sweet bunny outfits that we all know and thirst for. The MCs, Violet and Clover, play a game of who can touch the most bunny tails over the evening without getting caught. Prepare for fluff, funny innuendos as well as my thirst over hot boys in bunny outfits.

The story is divided in several parts and will be updated every few days. Find Part 1 here.

Story continues below the cut, hope you enjoy!

Both, Violet and Clover, were fair players, so, as they weren't able to walk around in a pair the whole evening, Violet and Clover had to trust each other in counting their own points.

Their utmost priority, however, was still to help out at the bar, so they had to focus on that for most of the time. But whenever there was a chance tangible (in the most literal sense lol), their minds immediately switched back to their little competition.

Violet had already started with one point advantage, due to the squeeze she had given Beel's tail.

But the girl was up for the thrill, so it didn't take too long until she had found her next target.

Everyone's beloved angel man Simeon was on cooking duty with her and Barbatos.

While the butler was easily handling all of their tasks on his own, the other two were trying their best to actually help him instead of being in the way.

They were chopping down ingredients that Barbatos could throw into the hellfire hot pot he was preparing when it happened...

A cheeky little squeeze while Simeon was turning to grab another veggie, and Violet got her second point already.

The angel didn't seem to have noticed, as he kept talking with this precious smile on his lips.

The real danger, however, came through the door immediately after.

Glancing up from the pompom that Violet had just given a good squish, she locked eyes with Luke.

They stared at each other for a hot second, then Violet straightened up again, trying to remain composed while Luke looked like losing his shit any second.

"Ah, Luke!" Simeon interrupted his own narration. "Perfect timing!"

Violet gave a silent sarcastic laugh. No, not a perfect timing at all...

Luke was still trying to cope with the sin he had just witnessed, but now Barbatos approached him as well.

"Could I ask for your help with the special menu's 'halo donuts'?” Barbatos asked. “Simeon claimed it to be your specialty."

Now Luke was blushing at the compliment.

"U-uhm... Well, yes, I do make quite good donuts... Fine, I'll help!"

As he passed Violet, he threw her a last sceptical glance, but soon the girl could let out a relieved breath.

Getting Luke to fuss over reaching for Simeon's butt was certainly not something she needed, not so soon into the game...

----------------

Clover was trying to gather some safe points before risking anything.

Her main goal was to get at least ONE point, to be frank.

Looking at her options for low-risk points, her heart was beating for one particular target, but her blushy excitement made it impossible to approach that gluttonous teddy bear.

So she settled on probably the easiest target of all.

Belphie's first shift consisted of... Sleeping. Like, literally. The idea was to let him nap until his energy tanks were filled enough for him to actually be useful for proper work.

Huddled over the bar, the youngest of the demon brothers seemed so vulnerable that even Clover could bring up enough courage to go for that tail.

Couldn't be that hard, right?

Well, it could.

Just as she was about the stretch out her shaking hand, someone walked right into her way and startled her completely.

As the girl gave an awkward squeal, Mammon looked at her with almost as much fright in his eyes.

"Waah, human, what are ya screamin´ at?!"

"I-I didn't... See you there..." Clover mumbled.

"I literally just passed by..." He raised an eyebrow. But seeing how her cheeks were flushed all red, a little grin curled his face. "I didn't know you'd get so excited to see me, human. I mean, I can't blame ya for being flustered at my sight, but what's all the blushing for?"

"I-I'm not flustered..." she stammered, trying to calm down.

"Come on, you can be honest", Mammon continued to tease, his ego-boosting mode fully activated. "I look damn nice in those clothes after all."

Clover shot him a glance, mustering how his vest fit him perfectly, how his shirt was slightly unbuttoned, and that he looked prrretty dang fine in shoes with heels.

"You do" she agreed.

Now Mammon was the one to flinch.

"F-for real?!" he blushed, then cleared his throat immediately. "I-I mean, thanks, I guess."

Mammon went silent for a moment, trying to calm his heart rate over the unexpected compliment.

"Want me to pose for ya?", he seemed to joke.

Clover looked at him... and sensed her chance.

"Yes please, great Mammon!" she exclaimed.

His tanned skin flushed an even darker colour, but, being the model he was, he actually did some poses for her. Now Clover didn't complain at that -- Mammon WAS a snack after all.

But after a while, she prompted him to give her a proper view of his back as well.

He seemed confused, even more so as she told him to stand still, but in the end did not seem to have noticed how Clover quickly poked his bunny tail. And while he was busy bragging about something modelling-related, Clover also turned to do the same with Belphie's tail as he was still asleep next to her.

"Thanks, Mammon!" she cheered afterwards, having scored not one, but three points at once.

With a little hop, she tackled Mammon into a quick hug before running off in a giggle.

Clover nearly bumped into Solomon while running away.

"Oh, hello... Why in such a hurry?" The sorcerer dodged her perfectly, his eyes sparkling in amusement as he mustered the clumsy girl.

"Huh? Oh, Solomon, sorry. Didn't see you there."

He laughed. "Well, I did guess that, seeing as you were focused on Mammon so intensely. The only question is... What did you do to leave him as such a blushing mess?"

"... I hugged him" Clover said, shrugging.

But seeing Solomon's expression, she felt somewhat off. Was he waiting for a different answer...?

"Well then, time to get back to work" Solomon changed the topic. "We don't want to waste time, do we? The bar opens soon."

He turned, but had yet to get moving. Instead, Solomon was taking a look around, completely exposing his bunny tail to Clover.

Which was worth three points, after all...

And it seemed like just the perfect opportunity...

"Yep, see you", Clover replied, turning around herself, leaving.

As much as she liked Solomon, this man was emitting such shady vibes that there was no getting her to touch this particular bunny tail…

--------------

Clover had bragged to her friend about her point advantage soon after (and spoke of her concerns regarding Mr. Shady MCShady),

Which she'd later realise had been a pretty bad idea.

Maybe fueled by rivalry, maybe just because Violet had some weird kink for pompom-like things, she upped her game SO much after that. (A/N: Ok it's not a kink, I was prompted to make sure everyone knows that... (But also it's a kink believe me hehehe))

Within the next hour, Violet scored another four points.

"Asmo, Mammon, and Beel again?!" Clover cried out in disbelief when the girls found each other in the kitchen. "What's wrong with you?!"

"Hehe~" Violet laughed. "I just had some good opportunities."

Clover rolled her eyes as she was cleaning some dishes. "Yeah, great, and I've been running around with top tier difficulty peeps like Papa Luci or Solomon. Talk about unfair..."

"I meeaan... You COULD squish them..."

"Yeah, sure, and risk dying? No thanks."

"Solomon wouldn't kill you... probably."

"... I´m telling you something´s UP with that guy today, I wouldn´t be so sure of that…" Clover joked, although having shivers go down her spine.

Before they could continue this, the kitchen door flew open.

Levi was dragging a trolley full of dirty glasses along with him.

He seemed awfully pissed.

"Levi?" Violet called out. "Are you okay...?"

He threw her a glance.

"Do I think I'm okay? In a place with so many Normies?" He gave a sigh, then seemed to have remembered something. "Ah, Violet, Lucifer said he needed you in the dancing hall."

The girl gave a nod, quickly wanting to make a leave since only fools would let a person like Lucifer wait. She shot Clover a glance before leaving, gesturing her to go for Levi's tail while they were alone.

Clover instantly felt that awkward pressure back on her, but now that she got called out she had to do it.

As the demon began placing the dishes in the dishwasher, Clover slowly approached him.

"Can I help you?" she asked.

"If you've got nothing better to do..." he mumbled, not looking up from his work. "Although, you'd probably do better to go out and have fun with the oth- AAAGH WHY ARE YOU SO CLOSE?!"

Clover gave an almost equal squeal as she backed away in an instant.

"I WanTeD To HeLp" she screamed.

"BUT WHY ARE SO CLOSE?!"

"DON'T SHOUT AT ME, I'M AWKWARD."

"I'M EVEN MORE AWKWARD THAN YOU ARE, IDIOT."

They stared at each other with red faces until Clover crouched down to sit on the floor, recovering from this incident.

"Wh-what are you doing there?" Levi asked.

"Sit. I like floors. It's where I belong."

The demon gave her a weird look before averted his gaze in a troubled expression.

After a little silence, he would speak up again.

"... You belong outside, not here on this stinky kitchen floor."

"Huh?"

He bit his lip sheepishly. "Serving the guests, or at the bar... Where everyone can see you."

"... Huh?" Clover seriously didn't understand what he was blushing about.

He was staring at her, searching for words, but then decided to simply poke her bunny ears.

"... Bunny maids are a clear 10/10, everyone knows that..." he mumbled.

The girl blinked, now realising he was trying to compliment her.

"Bunny butlers, too, though" she replied. "You look really good", she laughed, grabbing one flap of his jacket to play with it.

"Adasdhegagf...!!"

Yes, that is a thing Levi can say, while flushing red and bashfully covering his face.

Not able to take this compliment, he ended up on the floor as well.

"You can't just land a critical hit without a warning... I thought we were confidants...!"

"Rank six confidants", Clover nodded. "But that's only more the reason to tell you what a snack you are right now-"

"AAAAAHHH DON'T!!" he screeched, turning away from her to hide his embarrassment. "I can't deal with so much kindness..."

Clover blinked at the bunny tail right in front of her.

Target locked.

She gave it a careful squish, then snickered a little before standing up.

"But you deserve it. That's why... I'm calling a confident rank up!"

He turned his head. "R-really?! Rank seven already?!"

"Yup."

"Woah... to think I'd be such good friends with somebody one day... Thank you, Clover-chan...!"

"No, no... I have to thank you, Levia-tan."

-----------------

"You want me to select songs for the people to dance to...?"

Violet looked at the three monitors behind the DJ's table in the dancing hall.

Lucifer gave a nod. "We already added songs from Devildom artists, but we could use a little of a cultural mix" he said.

Satan walked up to Violet and Lucifer, now looking at the list of songs all together.

"We also need to add more to make the playlist last until the local closes" Lucifer continued. "I doubt that anyone will leave sober enough to remember such details, but Lord Diavolo ordered no repetitions in the playlist, so please, just help us out..."

Violet gave it some thought, not really knowing much about typical party songs. “I highly doubt my taste in hard rock will be a good representation of humanities taste in music, but... Well, that´s all I can serve with, so…” She came up with some nice picks from her own likings.

While Violet was eventually coming up with some nice tracks, in the meantime, Satan activated his pissing-off-Lucifer mode.

"Lucifer, you talk as if you'd know what a real party looks like", he mocked, referring to Lucifer's comment from before. "Have you even been to a club before?"

The oldest brother gave a huff.

"Of course I have."

"Oh? I meant on occasions other that picking up a drunk Asmo from IN FRONT OF the club."

"The answer is still a yes, thank you for clarifying."

Satan raised an eyebrow.

"Interesting", he hummed. "I can't really imagine you at a club, though... Dancing in the crowd... downing shots... or being cool in general..."

The avatar of Pride gave an annoyed sigh.

"You don't seem like a party animal either, Satan" he countered.

"Well I choose to avoid crowded places for most of the time. However, I still think I'd do better at settling in a club's atmosphere than you could."

Violet could almost feel how Lucifer's frustration piled up, even though he tried staying calm.

"Do you, huh...?" Lucifer leisurely responded.

And his outward calmness made Satan angry as well.

"You don't believe me?" the blond huffed. “Do you really think I couldn´t beat an old man at clubbing?”

Meanwhile, being in the middle of what felt like a flippin´ dance battle about to break out any moment, Violet prayed for them to stop fighting soon.

... Which didn't happen.

They kept bickering, partly because Satan talked himself into a fury and partly because Lucifer's pride was too big to admit defeat or weakness in any way.

Just when Violet had finished the playlist, Satan threw a final tantrum, leaving them with an outraged "Whatever!!" as he stomped off into another section of the dancing hall.

Lucifer pressed out a sigh, cutting through the awkward silence that had spread amongst them.

"What a troublesome child..." he mumbled.

Violet watched Satan with a worried expression, before turning to Lucifer with the same look on her face.

"... Don't worry, that is normal behaviour between Satan and me..." the male assured her. "He will get over his anger soon enough."

"And... What about you...? I feel like you are quite tense right now, yourself…" Violet asked.

"I should go and see where my help is needed now", he claimed, dodging her question.

Lucifer was gone before Violet could respond anything coherent.

Thus, giving a sigh, she decided to at least check how Satan was doing.

The avatar of Wrath was lumbering around some speakers, seeming as if he checked if everything was working as it should (despite having no idea how they were working.)

When he noticed Violet approaching, he only shot her a quick glance.

"Satan...?" The girl softly called out. "Are you okay?"

No answer.

It almost felt as if he was going to ignore her completely.

"... I don't get it” he then suddenly pressed out.

"What do you mean?" Violet took a careful step closer.

"I hate him" Satan growled.

The girl flinched, but decided not to say anything. She felt a certain frustration in his voice, and indeed, as he continued, his tone changed a little.

"He really pisses me off every time. I get angry, over nothing at all!" He clenched his fists. "And it makes me angry, his stupid face, his cocky attitude...!"

Then his shoulders fell. "... Why can't I just ignore him? I get angry, and then I get angry over getting angry. It's so...!"

Violet listened to him patiently.

"... It's so frustrating..." He mumbled.

"I can fathom..." Violet claimed, shooting him an encouraging smile as he slowly turned towards her. "But... Don't you think it's already a big step that you don't actually want to be angry?"

"... But what good is that when I do get angry after all?"

"You can't accomplish everything immediately” her expression softened even more. “What's important though is that you at least try."

Satan seemed sceptical, but in the end gave a slight nod.

"I guess... I'm sorry for bothering you."

The girl shook her head in a smile. "You´re not a bother. I´m glad you felt comfortable enough to tell me."

Shyly, she spread her arms, inviting him into a hug. A little awkward himself, he gave a little laugh before stepping close to embrace her.

"Everyone needs to vent out their anger sometimes" Violet reassured.

"... Thanks", he whispered.

As they parted, Satan turned to inspect the speakers again.

"Anyway... I think we checked through everything we needed in the dance hall. I will look over this here and then head out for my break."

"Mhm..." Violet muttered. "Sounds good..."

And there, she went for it.

A little touch - she didn't dare to do more than that.

But Satan's bunny tail had been successfully poked.

He continued to speak like nothing happened, so Violet dared to wish she had went for a whole squeeze instead.

"I should be going now", the girl said.

"Alright" Satan was still focused on inspecting the equipment, so Violet made her leave.

Unconsciously, she turned her head shortly before leaving the hall.

A shiver went down her spine, leaving her paralyzed for what felt like her last moments alive.

Satan's alarmed, slightly angered glare was cutting through the air, focussing her for a hot second before he decided to turn around again.

Hurrying out of the dance hall, dodging Solomon as he had nearly run into her, Violet quickly pulled out her phone as she had withdrawn from the scene of crime:

Violet: Clover I think Satan noticed me.

Clover: As in Senpai noticed me?

Violet: ...

Clover: :D

Violet: ... No, I squeezed his tail, but later on he was staring at me. Help.

Clover: ... So he's a three-pointer now?

Violet: I don't know but I feel like I nearly died so probably.

Clover: Lolol well that's what you get from messing with Satan. But I'll be kind and give you those two points. He did not confront you about it, after all.

"Hey, Violet!"

Violet flinched so heavily she nearly let go of her phone. Her first instinct had feared it was Satan calling her, but actually, she turned to look at somebody else.

"Lord Diavolo", she said. "Can I help you with anything?"

"I want to place the free snacks on the dining tables" he smiled. "Most of them are from the human world, so I want you to help me choose the best."

He was already going ahead, leaving Violet no room to explain that she's actually SO not a snacking person and had near to no idea how to help him.

Someone gave Diavolo keys for the storage room, and as they stepped inside, he turned on the lights.

"Woah...", Violet's mouth fell open. "That's... A lot of stuff."

"Fascinating, isn't it? You humans are so creative when it comes to food!"

He led her further inside where the snacks were stored.

Even though Violet liked him a lot, it still felt weird, being alone with the Prince of the whole flippin Devildom. You wouldn't have guessed it from Diavolo's carefree aura, but Violet was fairly overwhelmed, being able to walk alongside him so casually.

She tried her best at giving some advice as they looked through the huge collection together.

"We should go with a good mix of sweet and salty snacks" she explained. "Pretzels, chips or peanuts, together with something more delicate, gummies for example."

Diavolo beamed her a smile.

"I knew I could count on you!"

And he started grabbing things off the shelves.

Violet was helping, of course, but the storeroom was also tall as frick, so for lots of bags, she had to ask Diavolo to reach for it.

And that's when it hit her.

The currently vulnerable Diavolo, reaching for a bag of extra cheesy Tortilla chips, exposing his three-point worth bunny tail, only centimetres away from Violet's reach.

She literally only had to stretch out her hand a tiny bit.

And with the waterfall of words that Diavolo was talking, he wouldn't even notice.

It would be so easy.

But she couldn't do it.

She looked around. Between all the shelves, all the packages, back to the door they came from.

They were alone. She was sure of it.

But also, Violet had never felt more watched over than in this exact moment.

There was this presence lurking in the back of her neck, threatening her the more she tried to stretch out her arm.

Waiting for her to make one false decision...

"Extra DOUBLE cheesy?!"

Diavolo turned around, holding up a bag of Doritos. "Humans are so crazy!!"

Violet blinked at him, only now noticing that her whole body had tensed up so much it almost hurt.

"Y-yeah..."

As they walked out of the storeroom, arms full with all sorts of snacks, Violet gave a sigh. She had been so close... Only a little closer, and she…

"Should I take some of those from you?"

Violet did a little jump as she heard the voice next to her ear.

Barbatos was right beside her, smiling and tilting his head a little.

"My apologies, I didn't mean to scare you."

The way he mustered her, with his bunny ears and the bow tie around his neck, he looked so cute when he gently pulled most of the bags out of Violet's grip,

But sure as hell, today the girl learned to never pull any kind of prank on the Lord of the Devildom. Ever.

---------------

Violet was trying to catch a breath so she allowed herself a quick time-out in the bathroom. When she stepped outside again, she saw Solomon waving her over.

"I heard you and Lord Diavolo brought snacks to display? Would you mind helping me bring them to the tables?"

She gave a nod as an answer.

"Great. Then, let's divide them into the bowls first, and then go around with one of the trays."

And so they did. There wasn't much happening, really. Not much chatting, but nothing strange either.

Just one thing...

A bunch of perfect occasions to squeeze Solomon's bunny tail. Like, every few moments, he was focussing on something, leaving a perfect opening...

Violet left this situation without gaining any more points.

[vagrantblvrd]

Super self-indulgent FAHC AU wherein for whatever reason Geoff doesn’t come to Los Santos to start the FAKE AH Crew until ~later.

Meanwhile, everyone ends up in Los Santos anyway - because reasons - and have to scrape by without the support of the crew behind them?

Like, hacker/thief/??? Gavin ends up in Los Santos via a series of unfortunate events in which he is a total shit and sticks his nose where it doesn’t belong?

Cue his ~fleeing to the US and meandering his way along - getting in trouble along the way, because of course he does, but also amassing a rather impressive list of contacts and such as well - to Los Santos.

Where, lol, of course he gets in over his head yet again? Young and stupid and tries to get one past the wrong guy and before he knows it he’s got himself an arrangement, right?

Work for the guy he tried to fuck over or be horrifically murderized, and oh, hey? The family and friends he left back in England? Sure would be a shame if something happened to them, you know? They seem lovely.

(Why would you just look at the pictures and videos this guy has of them doing all sorts of everyday things and accidents happen, you know. Awful, that.)

Anyway, anyway, Gavin keeps his head down and plays good little hacker/thief/???.

Gives his new boss what he asks for out of him and no more, doesn’t volunteer information or skills or anything he may have himself or know someone who knows someone who might be useful.

No.

Gavin does what’s asked of him and lets his boss’ goons and thugs push him around - little weasel, a coward and so on?

But also Gavin is making a list (or two or three) that has all kinds of interesting information to be had in them? Things his boss’ enemies or other such interested parties could use to utterly ruin the bastard.

Gavin’s got plans, you see, it’s just a matter of time and all that.

Until then he’s meek and mild and does his part whether it be hacking or off to steal some shiny little bit of interest to his boss or whatever else his boss knows he’s capable of. (Nasty stuff, when you get down to it, strange how his boss never wonders how Gavin knows how to do any of this stuff or rest easy thinking they won’t be used on him, but arrogance will do that to people, I guess?)

ANYWAY.

Things are going along...well enough when Gavin’s boss brings in a new hacker.

This kid (not really a kid, if anything a couple of years younger than Gavin at most, but he seems young) who buckles down and plays nice without the rough treatment Gavin and the handful of other hackers and “specialists” like him that have been through the base where Gavin works most of the time.

Gavin would let things run their course for this “Matt Bragg” but he’s not like the others Gavin’s been forced to work with?

They were always the same kid of wrong as his boss and his boss’ favorite goons and thugs. Mean and cruel for the sake of it and didn’t worry who they were hurting so long as they made a profit off it.

But Matt Bragg, okay.

Quiet kid, keeps to himself and gets this pinched look on his face when their boss decides whatever information he handed over to him was to be used in the most “efficient” way possible.

Matt gives their boss two different routes to obtain whatever shiny he’s after, one with minimal casualties on all sides but it’ll take a little longer. The other requires guards and security to be killed, but it shaves a hefty chunk of time off the entire operation, and no bet which one their boss chooses.

And, look.

The fact that Matt took the time to come up with two different approaches like that - contingency plans, yeah, sure, that’s a given - but Matt went out of his way to devise a tactic to avoid having to kill people.

Other things like that crop up from time to time, and Matt gets into trouble for it sometimes, taking too long to get the boss the information he wants because he’s concerned about having to kill some hired guns in a batch of mercs or rent a cops or whatever.

But he keeps on looking for those alternatives, and Gavin takes an interest.

Realizes Matt’s in the same boat as him with regards to working for their boss. Details might not be exactly the same, but whatever they are he ended up here same as Gavin, and that’s.

Interesting?

interesting.

Enough for Gavin to take that interest in Matt, sabotage him here and there so the boss gets pissed, yeah, punishes Matt by restricting his “privileges” and so on?

But there’s a good reason for that.

Because Matt’s good at what he does, too good, and there have been others like him through here before.

Got chewed up and spat out and left to fend for themselves when the cops (or worse) came looking.

Got set up, put on a job and left high and dry in the middle of it while the boss and his flunkies got away with the shiny they were after and a pretty little scapegoat/sacrifice left behind.

It’s where Matt’s headed if he’s not careful, and he isn’t.

Careful, that is.

Goes along with what the boss wants, but he’s the stubborn kind of idiot, you know?

Mouths off when he shouldn’t, and it gets him knocked around a bit. Gets him noticed by their boss’ goons and thugs when it’s the last thing people like them need or want.

Matt’s not stupid, realizes what’s going on and goes to confront Gavin about it, grabs his arm and freezes when Gavin lets out this little hiss f pain, pulls his arm back when Matt’s left staring at him.

Because in all the commotion Gavin’s sleeve got pulled up and there are these marks, bruises and worse and faded scars and -

“What - “

Gavin scowls at Matt, because rude, and also, idiot.

“Leave it alone, Matt Bragg,” he says, meaning Gavin deliberately fucking Matt over and everything else, because you know, because.

Those jobs and tasks and whatnot of Matt’s that Gavin sabotages him on?

Have to get done by someone, and Gavin’s reliable about things like that, isn’t he. (Has to be with everything he’s got on the line and all.)

So Gavin does the jobs/whatever Matt was supposed to and since Gavin has certain skills and the whatnot Matt doesn’t he ends up in the field when Matt would have remained at the base.

Gets hands on experience with whatever conundrum was posed to Matt, and sometimes that means he gets hurt because like hell will his boss offer him helpful support and such, you know?

It’s Gavin thieving about in hostile territory and with the odds stacked against him and shit always goes wrong.

And if it’s not the job/whatever where Gavin gets hurt you can bet their boss’ goons and thugs have something to say about things. (Gavin’s got a mouth on him even now, and makes enemies like you wouldn’t believe without trying.)

So anyway, anyway, Matt is like !!! and oh, you fucking moron, and drags Gavin off to get propery patched up.

Cue Friendship montage in which they realize they’re more or less working towards the same goals - Gavin wants the fuck out of this arrangement he was forced into and would rather do that than burn things to the ground while he’s still inside.

But Matt?

Lol, fucker would cheerfully burn the place down around him and figure his way out from there.

So.

Montage sequence in which they team up and utterly wreck their boss and his operation.

And, you know, because hackers end up filthy rich afterwards.

Fuck around for a while because Freedom and Choice and :DDDDDDDDDDDDDD but then they get word their boss had enemies who are looking to take over his territory and such and Gavin and Matt are like “...wait.”

Between them they have the resources and connections to set themselves for life in Los Santos, so they do?

Start setting up their own little criminal empires in the remains of their former boss’, and they start by bringing in assholes like this Rimmy Tim guy Matt met out at a bar one night?

Recently liberated from their boss and getting a drink to celebrate while Gavin was making sure things were good back in England and his boss’ allies/whoever couldn’t touch them and Matt’s more than a little tipsy, you know?

Mouths off to the wrong guy and almost gets the shit beat out of him but this weirdo in purple and orange (”I remember yellow, too?”) comes along and plays white knight for Matt.

At which point Matt has to buy him a drink as a thank you and the two of then end up getting shit-faced drunk.

Also you know.

Smooches are exchanged because oh, hey, he’s cute/hot/I like his face a lot before the alcohol kicks in and they end up snuggled together on a bed and passing the fuck out.

Not important whose bed, so much as the !!! the morning afterward realizing they went home with some weirdo and...smooched? Before snuggling and passing out???

And then awkward dating, because of course, and hey, since we’re building a criminal empire I totally know a guy, Matt says to Gavin, and then has to add, “It’s uh. We’re dating? But he’s exactly what we’re looking for for the whole...criminal empire thing???”

Gavin would be highly critical of Matt and his everything if it weren’t for the fact a bounty hunter he tangled with a ways back finally tracked him down?

Michael is super not thrilled with him, because of course?

This whole Thing where Michael got sent after this asshole hacker/thief/whatever in Gavin and they ended up being all 80s movies romcom/action flick flirting while avoiding the legit hitmen sent after Gavin?

Saving one another’s lives - at one point administering mouth-to-mouth - and getting matching flesh wounds in a shootout followed by a teensy amount of torture by some baddie?

And then!

Michael rethinking turning Gavin in only for Gavin to make that decision moot when Gavin knocked him out and chained him to a motel radiator before fleeing to parts unknown?

Only not so unknown as Michael finally found him.

There’s a cat and mouse game that ends up with both of then soaking wet - caught out in a rainstorm/went for a swim in a river/body of water - and Michael scowling at Gavin like he’s about to beat the shit out of him?

Only he kind of does...not that, what with the Angry Kissing that’s happening and Gavin’s !!! that turns to :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD and Michael’s >:((((((((((((((((((((((((((( that turns to >:((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((( becuase Gavin is a piece of shit and Michael hates him so fucking much, stop laughing you little shit!!1! >:(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

Anyway.

Gavin and Matt have Jeremy and Michael, and then the rest trickle in?

Like.

Gavin worked with a gang a while back that hired this sniper - odd sort, but damn good with a sniper rifle and the kind you can trust to keep their mouth shut.

Ray’s not in it for the long-haul, not looking for a crew, but he’s always up to do a favor for friends and such.

And then Michael meets Lindsay through -

“Don’t fucking ask, seriously.”

And then!

Some friend of Jeremy’s in Trevor - this !!! You!!1! - moment between Gavin and Trevor because Thieves!!1! who may or may not have run into one another in the field and ensuing shenanigans as they were after the same shiny and oh, what a fun night that was, eh?

Alfredo just.

Suddenly fucking there???

Seems to know Michael who is like, “Oh, this fucker,” and no one can tell if he likes Alfredo at first? But then it comes out Alfredo used to be a bounty hunter too before he decided it was more fun being a “bad guy”

(Extenuating circumstances in which he was hired by some people to bring in some poor bastard who was innocent of whatever crime they said he committed because reasons? Alfredo finding out and then shenanigans in which he saved the poor guy’s life and set them up with a new life somewhere and ended up being framed for crimes he didn’t commit and all that. And since he was being framed for crimes he didn’t commit, why the hell not go out and commit actual crimes?

But.

Like.

Fun crimes.)

And then!!1!

Just as things are going smoothly, Gavin and Matt’s old boss manages to hire some assholes to kill Gavin? Matt would be great, sure, but the focus is on making Gavin super fucking dead, and everyone is freaking out, right, because for whatever reason they all like the little shit?

General sort of panic/mayhem until one of the assholes hired to kill Gavin actually gets their hands on him?

Catches him alone somewhere and while everyone is panicking trying to find Gavin, Gavin himself is :DDDDDDDDDDDD because the asshole who caught him is the fucking Vagabond.

When everyone gets to where they are Gavin’s like ??? at all the fear/panic he’s seeing and is like. “Guys, it’s my ex!”

Because this whole thing way, way before Michael and such where Gavin met Ryan and somehow wasn’t murdered?

Managed to make friends with the bastard that turned into something more and it was good, really, really good, until it wasn’t.

Someone from Ryan’s past gunning for him and Ryan ran Gavin off - “Bastard shot me!” but Gavin’s not mad, not anymore.

And it wasn’t like Ryan ran him off so much as dumped him at the ER and left Gavin to deal with the gunshot wound and explaining how he came by it to the authorities and then trying to find the bastard again afterward.

Which...he didn’t, but after months looking for him his contacts told him the Vagabond had set up shop in a city somewhere and seemed to be doing well for himself?

And Gavin was like :(((((((((((( because oh, well then, thinking maybe Ryan was better off without him weighing him down and such?

(Because hey, Vagabond and some hacker/thief/whatver in Gavin and honestly, no doubt who the more capable/dangerous one of them was.)

Thinking if Ryan wanted to, he could have come back for Gavin, or at least looked for him, but he hadn’t,so.

Gavin left him to it, kept on his way towards eventually arriving in Los Santos and everything that happened since - including Michael, oh shit - and then, uh.

Super awkward inching towards Mavinwood with Gavin and his feelings for Michael and Ryan and Michael and Ryan with their feelings for Gavin? But also bonding over the fact they have feelings for Gavin, because the guy’s a little shit, you know?

Complete asshole, and oh my God, do you want to hear about this one thing he did once?”

And so on, and also other reasons such as oh no, he’s hot and oh no, he’s an unbearable dumbass, why do I always fall for them?

Fiona comes along because Gavin’s old friends in England get curious about what’s going on with him and there’s a misunderstanding and she kid of, sort of, tries to kill him?

Like.

A lot.

Worse than that time every asshole in the city (and beyond) were after the price on Gavin’s head and persistent as hell and “Wait, Dan told you to what?”

And Fiona’s like “He said, and aI quote, ‘Take care of the wanker, for me, would you, Fiona? I’ll owe you,” and other such things and Gavin almost dies from laughing so hard while Fiona’s like “What? What are you laughing at, you asshole?”

More shenanigans and such and by the time Geoff and Jack do get to Los Santos they’ve heard about this weird as fuck crew  - dangerous, rumors say they took out the biggest name in Los Santos’ history to get where they are - and are greeted with Gavin and Matt and all the other assholes, what even??

[miraculouscontent]

I just saw Felix, I am enraged beyond belief, and right now, I want someone to tear this episode and Astruc a new one. And who better than the Salt Fairy?

s-sALT FAIRY?? JDNGKFDG

WELL, WHO AM I TO DENY SUCH A REQUEST?

[Vanilla Graham Crackers]

So, I totally understand the idea that making new models is hard and it’s best to cut corners where one can, but that should only be done if it can be used in a way that doesn’t - you know - reuse two important character models and add almost nothing new to them.

To start off, you have Amelie, Emilie’s twin sister who they obviously reused Emilie’s model for.

Then you have Felix, whose mother’s genes must’ve kicked the tar out of his father’s genes (and the same must’ve happened to Adrien unless Gabriel’s model is reused for Felix’s father’s too if we ever get a flashback/picture but we’re not getting into that) considering that Felix looks like Adrien’s twin rather than Adrien’s cousin (if they pull some sort of thing about Felix actually being Adrien’s twin just as some sort of cheap “gotcha,” I swear–though I doubt it because Amelie has a line about them looking “just like twins” which would be strange for someone who would’ve already known they were twins unless she doesn’t know that they’re twins either because some weird things happened and–I’m getting off-topic…).

Already, these are both new characters who are being introduced in this episode that are edited versions of previous models we’ve seen on the show.

The thing is that I don’t care much if the models are reused, but they should at least have facial structures that look different enough to make them their own characters. At least reverse Amelie’s hair, gosh darn it.

Even Felix, like–I don’t even think any of the characters would find it odd if the “Adrien” in the video had different cheekbones or a different jawline. Felix could even have blue eyes but edit the video to make his eyes green (and then make an excuse as to why his eyes are blue when the villains show up). The Adrien model could be reused but still adjusted so he at least has a different freaking eye style, since those are usually the big thing that gives away the feeling of, “oh, the model is just reused.”

I mean, it makes sense for Felix’s name to be in the title of the episode, but that’s only because he actually got different hair and a different outfit, since even the people who get akumatized in this episode are reused.

Lady Wifi, who’s been seen multiple times in Season 1 and 3 now.

Princess Fragrance, who’s been used the least out of everyone else but has still been seen multiple times (counting scarlet edition Princess Fragrance).

And Reflekta, who’s been used multiple times even if you’re only counting Season 3. Reflekta even makes the least sense out of all the characters since she’s a bad combination with the others. Dark Cupid would’ve even been a better pick since Lady Wifi could freeze someone and then either Dark Cupid could get a clear shot or Princess Fragrance could force them to inhale her perfume.

They don’t even have a proper unique theme to them, like a design that they all share to show that they’re a team. It’s just a repeat of their past akuma forms except Lady Wifi doesn’t have to worry about being defeated in the same way as before I guess (not that they try it anyway)? I don’t question Alya being the only one to get an upgrade because the tablet is hers, but when we’ve already had an episode where a tablet was used as a “hey akuma, aim here” object, and the people who held it combined in that one because they had a shared goal, only to have this one be different and just turn them into separate forms?

Yeaaaah, no, that’s weird. That’s just weird. It’d be one thing if they were sure that there were two Adrien around and they needed to be separated so they could cover multiple people, but they’re not aware that Felix is around nor that he disguised himself as Adrien, requiring them to cover multiple grounds (and even then, that doesn’t need three of them).

I’ll say again that I don’t mind repeat akuma, but it has to make sense. Stormy Weather 2 and Gamer 2.0 made sense to come back even though I didn’t like their episodes or the messages behind them, but Reflektdoll and the Trio of Punishers here?

No, just–no.

(this is also once again keeping the “girl squad” quota in place which everyone knows I dislike; I just want the boys to be more involved sometimes and not have anyone’s involvement be based on what gender they are)

(also also, Ladybug defeating all of them in a few seconds demonstrates how incompetent they are as a team; defeating Nathalie is not a high bar for efficient villainry)

So, already with that, the episode is bland and doesn’t provide anything interesting; even Felix disguises himself as Adrien perfectly later on, so the model that was edited in any sort of significant way changes back to its oRinGaL fOrM partway through the episode just for the like, two viewers who couldn’t tell that he’s a duplicate of Adrien structurally.

Heck, and even once Felix does disguise himself as Adrien, he’s still making very “Adrien” faces. The camera switching from Adrien to Felix (disguised as Adrien) when the villains show up is a perfect example.

Same face, same pose. It’s like they’re the same person at times (and no, I don’t believe that Felix is that good of an actor when he just got jumped by three teenage girls in outlandish clothing who came out of the phone in his hands).

There’s also the plot with Gabriel and the twin rings. Firstly, the opening is basically the one from “Chat Blanc” with the ring detail added. I remember seeing “Chat Blanc” and then being weirded out when “Felix” hit like, “Wait, is this–?”

Even disregarding that, there’s a certain awkwardness to Gabriel’s behavior. Of course, we all know that Emilie is actually alive and (un)well, so Gabriel being upset with Adrien isn’t entirely wrong (since, to Gabriel, it sounds like his son is supporting him having an affair), but for Gabriel to lash out in an almost childish manner when we’ve seen Gabriel hold Nathalie/Mayura tenderly and we can see that they have something going on, it seems extremely unprompted and just an excuse for Gabriel to not have to tell Adrien that he’s Hawk Moth.

It also brings up the question as to what changed between Gabriel saying that he already wished that he could tell Adrien what he was doing since Adrien would understand, compared to now where Gabriel is completely okay with telling Adrien.

Everything’s too up in the air, too vague, and nothing hits like it should. The episode throws five shots at its viewers at once (”Amelie and Felix,” “The Twin Rings,” “Gabriel Almost Telling Adrien That He’s Hawk Moth,” “Three People Getting Akumatized at Once,” and “Marinette Successfully Sending a Confession to Adrien”) but none of them strike properly. They’re all fighting for screentime to the point where we don’t even see Alya’s more detailed reaction to “Adrien” rejecting Marinette’s confession (she looks slightly more annoyed than everyone else, I guess) when Alya had made such a big deal about Marinette confessing beforehand (I’ll forgive her just this once for flashing her tablet, unprompted, in Marinette’s anxious face since Alya largely does nothing bad outside of that). The episode tries too hard to be big and impactful but misses the mark because none of the things it’s trying to do can play out in a way that makes it feel like they’re important.

Amelie and Felix don’t have original models.

The twin rings haven’t been brought up in any significant way before.

Gabriel and Nathalie talk about Adrien knowing about the Hawk Moth thing once and then presumably give up with no explanation as to why Gabriel isn’t going to try again since Adrien clearly just misunderstood him.

The three people getting akumatized end up turning into forms we’ve seen before, all of which have been in this season, even if it was sparingly.

Marinette’s confession doesn’t even get misinterpreted by Adrien; it’s viewed by Felix and promptly deleted.

Oh yeah, and then there’s THAT scene…

[Consententious]

Alright, so I can’t really talk about this scene without talking about the supposed reason for why this episode exists.

For the 0.01% of people who aren’t aware, Felix is the original Adrien from the Miraculous PV, which is what Miraculous Ladybug used to be before it became the show it is now. Astruc has said, time and time again, that he did not like this character and that was why Adrien had replaced him.

The fandom clung to Felix, however. People were still interested in the “what-ifs” and “what could’ve been”s, especially as situations rose in-show where people felt like Felix would’ve reacted in a way that was different/better than how Adrien would have reacted.

Astruc was the one most known for disliking Felix, but another thing he was known for was lying to people in order to keep future things in the show a secret.

You know that scene in “Kwamibuster,” where Tikki keeps something from Marinette, and when she then tries to explain something else to Marinette, Marinette points out, “You see, the problem now is that I’m always going to wonder if you’re lying or not”?

Yeah, that’s basically the fandom with Astruc. Whether Astruc’s behavior was justified or not, it’s harder to believe what he says when he openly admitted to lying to everyone.

This brings us back to Felix. In terms of what Astruc has told us on him, it’s been inconsistent, to say the least.

He claimed that Adrien was created because Felix wasn’t an interesting character, then said that Felix was interesting even though he wasn’t fit to be a hero despite later claims of Felix being a weak character who was more of an anime cliche, which was then further uprooted by outright stating that Felix was bad/evil.

Essentially, regardless of what has been said about this episode’s existence, this entire episode feels like a response to the side of the fandom that firmly believes that Felix would have been better than Adrien, and that looks bad because such episodes tend to never go over well with the fandom.

- Felix is shown as cold and unfeeling whereas Adrien is understanding if a bit solemn.

- Felix and Adrien are compared directly by both having a dead parent who died recently.

- Felix reacts negatively to Adrien’s behavior whereas Adrien tries to excuse Felix’s actions and be a good person.

- Plagg (who Felix would’ve had in the PV) is given a MUCH bigger input on things than he usually is, even to the point of comparing Felix and Adrien directly. The episode also has Felix ruining a piece of cheese in Plagg’s stash, whereas Plagg is typically not directly affected by the actions of other characters.

- Felix’s actions of rooting through Adrien’s things may or may not be a comparison to Lila (another character that Astruc doesn’t like) from “Oni-chan,” who riffled through Adrien’s things while Adrien was distracted. This is further supported by Plagg calling out both of these to Adrien and Adrien excusing both of them.

- Felix literally disguising himself as Adrien and Marinette not only noticing the facade straight away, but proclaiming angrily that Felix!Adrien is “not Adrien.”

- Felix implied to even be emotionally weaker than Adrien by his face at Chat’s comment about him not having many friends, his face in response to Marinette’s confession, and Adrien asking him to call if he needs support.

And then, we have the big scene where Felix (disguised as Adrien) tries to force a kiss on Ladybug, in which there’s a clear “no means no” message followed by a punch to Felix’s face.

Now… first off, yes, this is obviously yet another jab at the comparison between Felix and Chat. Felix tried to force a kiss on Ladybug whereas Chat has–

…well, he’s never gotten one off, at least, and stops when something happens (either Ladybug gets pulled back into the fight or she stops him with a hand/her words).

This is also shown by how Ladybug states post-punch that “Adrien would never be so pushy,” immediately followed by Chat Noir showing up and insulting Felix.

…Yeah, I’ll tackle the message first.

While this idea of “no means no” is nice and all, it ignores the nuance of what actually means “yes.” The forced kiss still would have been wrong if it’d been towards someone like Juleka, who would’ve locked up at the sight of someone trying to force themself on her, or someone like Rose, who may’ve been completely oblivious as to what the forcer would’ve been doing until it was too late. It might seem like a small thing, but just saying “what part of ‘no’ did you not understand?” leaves the obvious loophole of “WELL, if they DON’T say ‘no’ then that makes it okay.”

As for Chat, well… the setup not only didn’t make sense as a comparison to him, but it doesn’t function as a comparison in the episode itself.

See, the setup is wrong because Felix is not doing this because he’s a creep. He’s not someone who’s crushing on Ladybug and disguised himself as Adrien in hopes that she would favor him and let him kiss her.

In fact, Felix is fully aware that kissing someone without their consent is wrong; the reason he’s doing it is to ruin Adrien’s reputation.

Would Felix actually do that if he were lusting over Ladybug or crushing on a girl legitimately? We don’t know, and that’s exactly why Felix and Chat’s actions are not comparable.

This isn’t a case of, “Character B and C are attracted to Character A. Character C stops when told/prompted to stop whereas Character B continues despite those things.” Chat and Felix have entirely different motives when trying to kiss Ladybug.

Chat leans in for a kiss multiple times and is stopped by either Ladybug or whatever’s happening around them. Even if he stops when told/prompted to, he starts back up, whether it’s later in the episode or in a later episode beyond it.

Felix’s actions are wrong and I will not deny that, nor will I compare him directly to Chat and say that one is worse than the other.

I will just say: Felix is aware that he’s doing something scummy and is doing so to make someone he dislikes look bad. Chat may be aware that he can’t proceed with a kiss if Ladybug denies it or prompts him to back off, but he still tries over and over to flirt and/or lean in for a kiss in hopes that she’ll return it eventually. Whatever form of “no” Ladybug gives him (as it can come in many forms), Chat still believes that trying again later is perfectly fine and that asking is not necessary no matter how many times she’s denied him or rejected his feelings.

As for why the setup doesn’t function, it’s because we, in this episode, do not have a direct comparison between Felix’s advances and Chat’s. Chat isn’t given the screentime to properly flirt with Ladybug or try to make any sort of advance on her, so there’s no “that was Felix, this is Chat,” moment.

Is that because the writers were aware that Chat’s behavior is still not up to speed with how people should act in reality? Maybe, maybe not, but the point is that they didn’t have it.

Now, that said, there indeed was a character in the episode who made it very clear (both through his body language and through his words) that he respected the actions, space, and choices of the one he was in love with.

But, who was that again…?

O O P S

Like, look, I’m not getting into Luka’s role in the episode (though I’ll just say that, while I adore the boy, this wasn’t the episode for him and - had I not needed to go into other subjects - I definitely would be rambling about the disservice both he and Marinette get in general), but I’m just pointing out the very obvious misstep taken. If this episode was a response to the fandom, I guess one could argue that this is knocking any idea of Felix being Marinette’s other love interest instead of Luka, but when people think of “someone trying to kiss Marinette/Ladybug,” Luka is not going to be the first one who comes to mind; that’s gonna be Chat and the writing dropped the ball entirely because it couldn’t pull it off without having to address his behavior or risk sending an, “only no means no,” message.

Oh, and speaking of dropping the ball, even Felix doesn’t get dropped entirely, because the writing didn’t even do Felix dirty CORRECTLY.

[Failing Felix]

Just for a moment, let’s roll (completely roll, this time) with the idea that this entire episode is a response to the side of the fandom who really liked Felix and preferred him over Adrien.

By that logic, the standard thing to do would be to make Felix as evil and possible and make everyone hate him, yes?

However, that “standard thing” is completely missing from this plot.

Felix, by the end of the episode, already has two motives.

The first is stated outright by the end, though could also be inferred early on as well: Felix wanted to get the twin rings back for his mother. In addition, it is not for his own selfish gain, as he isn’t even aware that his mother wanted to get the rings back so she could give them to him.

Felix wanted to get the twin rings back because his mother had told him that they were part of their family, not Gabriel’s, and Felix sought to retrieve them himself.

The second motive is for his actions outside of Gabriel, which is him judging Adrien and trying to ruin Adrien’s reputation.

Even Felix’s bitterness towards Adrien is showcased, though in small doses.

When Adrien apologizes to Felix for not going to his father’s funeral, Felix retorts with,

“You always do everything your father tells you to do?”

Right there is Felix’s problem with Adrien: he views Adrien as a doormat (a common fan complaint anyway tbh). This is not helped when Adrien excuses his father’s actions with a smile (which may come off as insensitive; Adrien, be UPSET by your father, not sheepishly smiling about what he did) by saying that his father is “very protective.”

Felix only initiates his stealing of Adrien’s things after this scene takes place; immediately after this takes place, as a matter of fact.

The other key interaction that takes place is when Felix enters the mansion. He reaches out for a handshake, but Adrien goes in for a hug.

Adrien doesn’t know that a hand reaching out in a handshake gesture isn’t consent.

Already, Adrien has come off as touchy, unable to read Felix’s gestures, and possibly insensitive.

Further on are Felix’s comments on the things he finds in Adrien’s phone:

Adrien’s obvious crush on Ladybug - Felix sees it as idiotic which… yeah, it would look like a childish celebrity crush without context

Nino’s video - 90% sure the reaction there was the “teenage” version of how Gabriel judged Nino in “Bubbler;” pretty standard rich boy judgment

Rose’s video - …I’m sorry, I can’t blame Felix for that one; that was so overly gushy and cheerful that I winced

Max’s video - Felix doesn’t seem like the type to like jokes and he also thinks that whole thing is weird (also not knowing that Markov is “real”); could go either or on how out-of-place his comment was.

Chloe’s video - Felix doesn’t like Chloe and I can’t blame him for that one either.

Marinette’s video - Felix has a different reaction to this one and I imagine he either thinks that Adrien is dating Marinette (and could think it’s pathetic for a variety of reasons from “Adrien is already crushing on Ladybug” or “the doormat boy has a girlfriend”) or thinks that Marinette confessing over video is pathetic

Even when Felix goes against Ladybug and Chat, he’s probably realized at that point that impulsively impersonating Adrien won’t get him anywhere close to sleight-of-handing Gabriel’s ring away. Also, Ladybug punched him (regardless of her reason why) and Chat insulted him despite only knowing things about him from what he heard from someone else.

None of this excuses any of Felix’s actions, but it is a reason that is introduced within the episode where said actions take place.

Unlike, say, Chloe, whose mother was shown off in the season after Chloe herself first appeared, giving us no context, reason, or motive for her behavior outside of “she’s a spoiled brat.”

Felix also did manage to come up with a convincing enough apology to get Gabriel to shake his hand, allowing Felix to safely snatch one of the twin rings away to return to his mother.

I don’t think anyone is complaining about Gabriel getting screwed over after “Chat Blanc,” just saying.

Even athletically, Felix scores a one-handed point in basketball with his back turned to the hoop, and he can go toe-to-toe with three akuma at once.

He even has a hobby in doing magic tricks, said hobby allowing him to steal Gabriel’s twin ring. Characters having hobbies is an important thing for fleshing them out, and Felix weirdly just… has one, and one that benefits him.

So, is Felix’s presence in the show an insult due to having a repeated character model and being used as a forced comparison to Adrien? Yes.

Does that mean he’s not workable in any form and can’t be used for the fandom’s desires?

Not really, no. At least, I certainly don’t think so.

The reality is that Felix was never a warm person, PV or otherwise, and his initial reaction to Adrien (”I don’t like you. You hugged me without my asking you and you let your father walk all over you.”) is honestly something I’d expect of him.

It’s when combined with the already terrible ideas of the episode and the convoluted nature of things that everything (including him) turns into a problem.

[tanzen-neko]

Freefall (Gavin x MC)

Freefall (Gavin x MC)

MLQC

Warnings: Hurt/comfort, brief mention of blood. 

Fluff inspired by “Free fall (ft. RUNN)- Ilenium and Gavin’s “Your Voice” call. 

It was late, and getting later. There was still no sign of Gavin. She bounced on the balls of her feet outside his apartment door, listening to the city clock chime midnight; the witching hour. Yet the only one who seemed to bear witness to its dark enchantment was her. Everything in the city seemed to be blanketing in stillness, and quiet. Normally, she would enjoy it, but not tonight. Tonight it just fed into her swirling thoughts and scattered pulse. Where was he?! She sat down in front of his door, the cold tile seeping through the thin summer dress she wore. She shivered slightly, and rubbed her arms to try and warm herself. She knew it was in vain; the coldness came from within her. She took a deep breath in, and exhaled slowly in an effort to calm herself. Taking out her phone again, she stared at his number debating on ringing it again. She knew he wouldn’t answer, that only his voicemail with its short, terse “This number is unavailable” would hear the frantic notes in her voice. And no matter how she ranted and raved at the cool unattached voice at the other end, Gavin would not magically appear and reassure her. After looking at his last text, (a short message telling her he was due back tonight) she closed it, the locking noise echoing through the empty hallway. It had only been hours since his call, but it felt like years. She always worried about Gavin when he went on missions, that was nothing new. But he had never called her when he was injured. She blamed it on his chivalrous nature. He had seemed to make it his life goal to shield her from the less than savory aspects of his job, shrugging off his scattering of new cuts and scrapes as nothing, not realizing that each time he was hurt, her heart broke a little more. Even she herself seemed to have been unaware of the extent of her worry. Gavin was a pillar of strength to her. Something to be fawned over, but never fretted about. Her closest friend, and confidant, she had seemed to take it for granted he would always come back to her. But when he called her after his brush with death, she hadn’t been able to concentrate on her work. He had just sounded so tired, so worn out. She had never heard him like that before, and the worry had gnawed at her until the point that Anna herself had told her to leave for the day, her sympathetic smile grating on her already tender nerves.

“He’s fine, you know,” she had blurted out hotly at her. Immediately she had felt her face flush in embarrassment. She hadn’t meant to snap at Anna. She just couldn't stand that look. A look that all but stated he was gone. Anna had looked startled and took a step back before recovering the smile on her face.

“I’m not saying otherwise, dear. I just think maybe you should take a break. You’ve been working nonstop since he’s been on this mission. I think it’s time you faced your own feelings.”

And with a gentle pat on her arm, she had left her desk. 

She snapped back to the current time, chewing her bottom lip. All on her walk home, she had thought about Anna’s departing words. Her own feelings? What had she meant? But even as she pretended ignorance, that voice in her heart had whispered the words she was afraid to say out loud. She liked Gavin. No, she loved Gavin. She loved him with every fiber of her soul. Being with him was like free falling into an endless abyss; petrifying, but oh so exhilarating. Every second she was with him, she felt alive. His smile, his frown, his awkward way of covering his mouth when he was nervous had painted itself on her soul until she was bathed in his colors. When she closed her eyes at night, his bright ember ones were the ones that helped her drift to sleep. When she felt insecure, his confident voice telling her she could do anything ran through her head. And whenever she felt stressed or bogged down by the day, she caught herself scrolling through photos she had captured of their outings on her phone, often laughing at Gavin’s shy aversion to smiling for her camera. He was truly the dearest part of her life. Why had it taken her so long to admit it? For that matter, when did the change creep upon her? Maybe it was after Minor’s multiple hints, or the way he emphasized her discovering the contents of the bloodstained letter from all those years ago. To this day whenever she brought it up to Gavin, he would rub the back of his neck, and tell her it didn’t matter. But it did, and she often found herself fantasizing about what he could have written and if their lives would be different if she had read it. Though she knew there was no use in it, she wished that she had gotten to know Gavin back then. But there was no point in dwelling in the past. She usually was a firm believer in that idea, but as usual, Gavin managed to stir up questions in her heart she tried to ignore. Well after his call, she had decided that she would no longer ignore the tingling she felt when he gripped her hand, or the way his eyes would cause the blood to rush straight to her head when he stared at her for longer than a second. She wouldn’t have called herself a coward, and she wasn't about to start now. So squaring her shoulders, she sat firmly against the back of his apartment door, vowing to stay as long as it took. 

The ding of the elevator and the sound of two deep male voices jarred her awake. She must have fallen asleep waiting for Gavin to come home. With a quick glance at her phone, she saw that an hour and a half had past. The men were coming further down the hallway, and her heart leaped in her throat when she recognized one surly voice as Gavin’s. Hopping up, she tried in vain to smooth out all the wrinkles in her dress. Frantically, she tried to fix her hair, and fumbled with her purse, trying to strike a pose that didn’t scream “Oh hey, I’ve been sitting and sleeping outside your door for awhile now even though you told me not to worry.”

“Eli, I told you I’m fine. Leave me alone, for God’s sake.”

“Tsk, tsk, Gavin. You’re in a foul mood for someone who should be thanking me for helping your sorry ass home.”

“I told you, I don’t need your damn help, Eli, I could have made it on my own.”

Oh really, is that why I had to help you-”

The two had made it around the corner, and Eli stopped talking in surprise at her presence. Gavin tried to break away from Eli who had his arm wrapped around his side in order to support him. He let out a slight grunt of pain, and she stepped forward, afraid of him falling. It was when she got up close that she could see just how tired they both were. With ripped uniforms, untucked shirts lacking ties, and muddied gear, it was clear that this mission was harder than most. Even Eli’s normally well coiffed hair was sticking up in disarray. He was still in better shape than Gavin was, however. Up close, she could see the scruff that had grown on his face while he was away, and the weariness in his amber colored eyes. Gavin stared at her, disbelief mixing with disapproval. 

“What are you doing here so late? Have you been out here by yourself?”

“ I, I haven’t been here long.” She pinched herself slightly for the lie. “And I’m here because, well..” She trailed off, suddenly feeling shy. Gavin still stared at her expectantly, the frown on his face making her feel like a student in the principal’s office. Eli looked back and forth between the two of them, a look of realization dawning on his face. His face broke into a smile that he tried to hide by clearing his throat. 

“Well, Gavin. I can see you’re in great hands, so I’ll be on my way. Take as long as you need to heal up. I’ll handle the paperwork.” He glanced at her, a mischievous light in his eyes.  “Take care of my partner for me, will you.” She felt herself start to blush, and she nodded her head, rubbing her arm. He shot a wink at Gavin, before making his way back to the elevators.

She and Gavin stood there for a moment in silence, both unsure of how to break it. Finally, he sighed. “Well, you might as well come in. It’s much too late for you to try and get back tonight.” He shuffled to his door, and she stepped aside quickly, suddenly feeling self conscious for the first time ever in his presence. He unlocked the door, kicking his shoes off barely before he made it to the entrance before switching on the kitchen light, bathing his apartment in a soft glow full of shadows. She had been to his apartment only once before, and quite briefly. Gavin kept a pristine look, clean and efficient, but it lacked comfort and style. She made a mental note to take him to pick out a few plants or pictures to help brighten up the space before she set down her phone and purse and opened the door to his fridge, grabbing a cold bottle of water for Gavin.  He was reclining at an awkward angle, eyes closed. 

She cleared her throat slightly to get his attention, and passed the water to him. Grunting out his thanks, he made quick work on it, and she felt herself mesmerized by the bobbing of his Adam's apple. She looked down, taken aback by the wave of lust that seemed to hit her as she stood in his presence. She had always thought Gavin was an incredibly handsome man, and sure sometimes she caught herself staring at his rear sometimes (all those squats paid off), but she had managed thus far to chalk that down to nothing more than appreciating a good looking friend. She could almost see Anna shaking her head in disapproval at her in her mind’s eyes. 

“Yes, yes, I’ll admit it”, she mumbled to herself in irritation.

“ What was that?” Gavin asked. She started in surprise. When had he stood up? 

“I said uh, less moonlit sits! I mean, I haven’t gone out for night walks since you’ve been gone.”

Gavin was still giving her a weird look, so she struggled to find a change of topic.

“Uh, should I get the shower running for you? I know you probably would like to bathe.”

Gavin shook his head before limping over to grab another bottle of water, grimacing when he bent down to grab it from the fridge.. He leaned against the counter, the shadows under his eyes almost like bruises.

“I was able to get a shower in at the hospital. Just didn’t think walking around in a backless hospital gown would have gone unnoticed.”  The corner of his lip quipped up in a slight smirk, and she found herself chuckling at the thought of Gavin on Sparky, gown blowing in the wind as passerbys stared in astonishment. 

“Hey don’t laugh,” he fussed, ears turning red as he covered his mouth. She waved her hands in denial, still unable to get the image out of her head.

“I’m not, I’m not! I’m sure you would still look very dignified Officer Gavin,” she said with mock seriousness. Gavin let out a “humph” of disbelief. There was a pause of silence, but as usual, it wasn’t an uncomfortable one. That was one of the things she liked, no loved, about Gavin. There was no awkwardness with him. It was like all the years of no contact, and the misunderstandings of high school had melted away the first time they reunited. She realized throughout their time together that he also never faulted her, or held her preconceived notions about him in the past against her. If anything, he was apologetic, as if the faux pas was caused by him and his rough approach to things. Gavin let out a yawn, and she felt a rush of shame. Here she was holding up his time, and he was too polite to say anything. What she had to say could wait; right now she needed to get him to bed. 

“Gavin, I’m so sorry! I know you’re tired, and here I am holding you up. Please, let’s at least get you to bed.” She knew he was tired when he didn’t put up a fight. He just put down his half finished water bottle, and nodded, wearily at her. She made her way over to him, and held out her arm. Gavin looked at her questioningly. 

“Lean on me. I’ll help you to bed.” 

I can make it on my own. Besides, you’re half my size.” She straightened her back, resolutely.

“I’m not spun glass, Gavin. You of all people should know that. Now, lean on me.” Ears turning red again, Gavin tentatively put some of his weight on her shoulder, his other arm coming around her for support. She felt his warmth practically burn through her dress, and her heart started pounding in her chest. She had been closer to him than this before, but as they made their way to his bedroom, she couldn’t help the blush that started to creep up her neck. Maybe it was due to the fact that she had never been in his bedroom before. She helped him down onto his bed, and in an effort to look everywhere but his face, turned on the bedside lamp. She couldn't help but smile at the bare room. Like the rest of the apartment, Gavin’s bedroom was in the same utilitarian style. Besides the plush duvet on the bed, or the hickory desk set, there wasn't more in the way of creature comforts. Gavin began to unbutton his shirt, and he let out a curse. She rushed over to him, and slapped his hands away, gently.

“I’ll do it. Please just relax.” Gavin’s hands fell to his sides, and his chest rose and fell rapidly as she slowly began unbuttoning his shirt. She could smell the antiseptic and the clean scent of soap. It seemed that as each button became undone, the tension in the air became more and more unbearable. She felt like she was holding her breath and forced herself to exhale. Too quickly (or not quickly enough, she wasn’t quite sure which one), his shirt was undone. With a bit of a struggle, she helped him remove it, Gavin grimacing in pain as he pulled it off. She stared at his chest, and for once wasn’t caught up in the beautiful display of his muscle. Instead, her eyes were fixed on the bandage covering his chest. It was right over his heart, and covered the span of his ribs. Already he was bleeding through, the tinge of blood almost jarring against the pristine white of the wrap. It needed to be changed already, and she tentatively touched the bandage. It became blurry before her eyes, and it took several blinks before she realized she was crying. 

“Hey, hey, it’s ok. I’m ok. I promise it looks worse than it is.” Gavin’s words were meant to comfort her, but instead she began crying harder. She couldn’t help it. What if he had been injured worse? Or better yet, what if he had died? He would have left this earth never knowing just what he meant to her.

“Gavin, I…” She couldn’t even finish her sentence. “You could have been hurt so much worse.”

He reached out his fingers, and clumsily tried to wipe the tears from her eyes. His calloused fingers sent tiny sparks against her cheeks. She sniffled, chagrined by her tears. 

“Sorry. You’re the one hurt, and I’m crying like a baby.” She tried to shake Gavin’s fingers away, but he just cupped her cheek, instead.

“You don’t ever have to apologize to me. I’ll always be around to take care of you.” She grabbed his hand, and dropped a kiss across his scarred knuckles. Gavin stilled. She made up her mind right then and there. She wouldn’t leave his room until he knew how she felt.

“Gavin, you always take care of me. For once, for once let me do something for you. She clambered off of the bed, and went to his bathroom to look for his medical kit. After rummaging under his sink, she came upon it. She made her way back to the bed, and ignoring Gavin’s protests, she set out to change his dressing. When she uncovered it, and saw the blood leaking out of his angry looking stitches, she felt a wave of dizziness come over her. She fought it off, however, and after cleaning it as gently as she could, rebandaging it. She secured it back underneath his ribs like the first bandage. She set back a little to admire her work, setting the kit on his bedside table.

“I know it’s not as good as the hospital’s but… It’s not too tight is it?” Her fingers begin to trail around the top of the bandage again, but this time she managed to keep the tears at bay. She drifted up higher, and ran them gently over the scar on his collarbone. She felt herself wishing that she had been there to take care of him when he got it, or any of the collections of scars he had. Making a promise right then and there to be there for the next one, she leaned forward and dropped a kiss on it. His flesh was hot underneath her lips, and she darted her tongue out to trace it. Gavin’s breathing picked up, and she could feel his heartbeat as she nuzzled his scar.

“What are you doing?” he asked hoarsely, muscles tensing up.

“Shhh. I’m taking care of you.”  She grabbed his hand, and gave the scars along each of his arms the same treatment. And as each kiss touched his skin, Gavin’s muscles became more and more relaxed. It felt like some tightly wound knot in his heart was slowly loosening with each caress. But though the knot was loosening, his pants seemed to be doing the opposite. He had dreamt of her kisses on his skin for so long, and now that it was happening, he didn’t have the strength to stop his body from reacting. 

She shuffled herself down the bed to his stomach, and dropped a kiss along his scars there. She could feel Gavin’s abs flexing underneath her tongue as she ran it along them. His breathing was coming out almost in pants now, and she heard him exhale sharply as she dropped wet kisses in a trail to the cluster of scars at his hip that always drove her crazy whenever his pants would ride low. She had wanted to kiss them for longer than she cared to admit. And as she ran her teeth lightly against them, Gavin let out a strangled groan. She did it again, and his hips involuntarily jerked against her slightly as he let out another whimper. She shifted herself and sat up to look at Gavin. His amber eyes almost glowed in the darkness, the burning mix of lust and yearning tinged with a hint of confusion piercing her to her very core. He pushed his hair out of his face, and looked away.

“______?” her name coming out in an almost soundless whisper. “Why?” She chewed her lip, suddenly nervous and afraid. What if Minor was confused? What if all this time together was just him being a good friend to someone being swept up in a story bigger than herself. But even if that was the case, she promised herself she would tell him. 

“I did it because I came to a conclusion today. Helped along by Minor and Anna. Gav, I, I love you. I love you so, so much. And if I’m honest, I think I’ve loved you for a while now. I’ll admit when you first came back around, I was scared of you.” She looked down, and rubbed her arm, sheepishly.

“All those rumors in high school, and the blood stained note, I never made an effort to talk to you. And I’m so so sorry about that. I just…” she trailed off, still upset with her past shelf for behaving the way she had. Gavin was silent for a beat. Suddenly, he grabbed her and pulled her to his uninjured side into a tight hug. She struggled a bit, worried about his bandages. As if reading her mind, Gavin ran a hand through her hair.

“It doesn’t hurt right now. Just, just let me hold you for a moment ok? Just for a little.”

Heart pounding, she relaxed and tentatively put her arms loosely around him. She loved the warmth of his body, the distinct comfort it always seemed to bring her. She breathed in his crisp, clean smell, and felt her heart slowly begin to resume a normal tempo. This was the effect he always had on her. Once in his arms, it seemed like there was never any problem she couldn’t overcome. There was something about his presence that just kept her grounded and calm. Gavin continued stroking her hair, and she felt her eyes begin to drift shut. The stress and worry, and then the sweet relief of being able to tell him how she felt hit her all at once. “Just for a few minutes more”, she thought. But before she knew it, she was sound asleep. Gavin heard her snoring softly, and chuckled to himself. Moving inch by painstaking inch so as to not wake her, he scooted his body down so that he was laying comfortably on his bed.. She let out a soft sigh before she snuggled closer to him. He dropped a kiss on the top of her head, the injury almost forgotten in lieu of her revelation. Belatedly, he realized he never said he loved her back, but that could wait. For now he whispered it softly in her ear before he closed his eyes, a soft smile of pure contentment on his face for the first time in a while. 

[bigskydreaming]

The really great thing about allowing Dick and Jason to have a good relationship before A Death in the Family IMO, is that it opens up sooooo many more possibilities for AFTER Jason’s return.

For example:

Imagine a scenario where Bruce is gone for a week or so, the ever so useful “there was an offworld mission or something” excuse will do. And during that time, Dick and Jason are patrolling and working together....and they have an encounter with a particularly nasty villain or serial killer or whatever you want to go with. The bottom line is something happens during that particular adventure of theirs that leaves them shaken enough that they agree not to tell Bruce about it (believing the guy is dead or something), and then they try and put it behind them and never speak of it again.

Except then cut to a few years later, after Jason has come back but before he’s reconciled with the family, things are still strained and tense when their paths so much as cross, but with added angst because an actual brotherly bond torn asunder by death, trauma and lots of changes gives you way more fodder to work with IMO than the singular facet of Dick feeling guilty for not knowing Jason better - I mean, you have to at least admit that does limit your options considerably, in terms of their interactions, BUT I DIGRESS.

But anyway, Jason doesn’t have anything against Dick in the way he does against Bruce, other than accepting Tim into the fold (which he does understand in a way, because its not all that different from when Dick accepted him into the family and Robin role despite having plenty of legitimate reasons to be a lot more reticent about that).....but they avoid each other because its just kinda painful, the fact that they don’t KNOW each other anymore, not the way they used to understand each other in ways even Bruce couldn’t always follow or understand. Plus Jason’s attack on Tim, even leaning on the Pit madness as an altered state of mind mitigating circumstance....like, that’s still a hard thing to get past, one brother being like “Hey, lets do movie night tomorrow and totes just skip over the awkwardness of me just coming from hanging out with Tim who still has bandages on account of you trying to kill him the other day”.....its not the easiest thing to navigate, yeah? 

And the fact that while Jason does understand its not fair to expect Dick to have like, iced out this kid he didn’t go seeking out or anything, just for the sake of Jason’s memory.....that understanding comes and goes with how rational or not he’s feeling any particular day, because he GETS it, but that doesn’t mean he has to like it and he is after all only nineteen, and capable of bouts of pettiness, lol.

So even without Dick barely knowing Jason or Jason hating or resenting Dick, there’s still plenty of roadblocks in the way of an easy brotherly reunion, plenty of understandable and valid emotions and priorities and choices that make everything a confusing mess and create conflicts of interest and just a general miasma of uncertainty where its like, even though they miss each other and would love to get back their sibling bond, they don’t even know where to begin trying to go about that, you know? And throw in the state of affairs between Bruce and Jason still, which can be summed up as picture the Cold War, but now when you picture ‘Cold’ think ‘Ice Age’ and you’re almost there.

Like. That is the Mt. Saint Helens of roadblocks right there. A big ass volcano sitting in the middle of the road and just cuz its dormant now doesn’t mean that it couldn’t at any minute erupt and blow its top and destroy everything within a several hundred mile radius, and that’s just before Bruce and Jason REALLY get steamed, like, that’s just their warm-up.

So. Y’know. Difficulties. They abound.

But now throw in secrets from the time before Jason died that only the two of them know and they never told anyone else, and adventures they had when it was just the two of them, Jason visiting Dick in Bludhaven or Dick enabling Jason in playing hooky in Gotham because at that time Dick rotates methods of pissing Bruce off and that’s his go-to move for Tuesdays, and crimes they solved together like Dick was working on an investigation and let Jason weigh in to practice his deductive reasoning without Bruce and thus impress him with how much he’s improved. 

(My personal headcanon of brotherly advice Dick imparts to Jason on how to deal with Bruce is him telling Jason “when dealing with a man who thinks holding impossible expectations IS taking it easy on someone, he doesn’t understand the question, can you repeat it please....like, in that case there’s no shame in stacking the deck a little, whenever that’s possible.’)

Anyway, point being.....all you really need is one singular bad guy that only Dick and Jason faced, together, when they were younger. Someone particularly nasty or sadistic, enough to disturb even them despite how much they’ve seen and lived. And who for whatever reason, both of them believed to be gone for good, maybe they thought he fell off a cliff into a conveniently placed body of water where no body could be found or blah blah blah look you’re smart cookies, you get it.

Take those few simple ingredients, chuck them in a metaphorical bowl and stir them all together and then leave on low heat to simmer.....

And voila. Just like that, you have a ready-made situation that forces Dick and Jason, specifically, to work together despite how tense and fractured things are between them, and needing to find a way to repair their brotherly bond and figure out how to work together the way they used to.......thanks to everyone’s favorite Tropey McTroperson wherein a villain most foul, long believed dead, seems to be back and up to his old villainy.....and only those two who faced him before know how to stop him.....and despite all the reasons they come up with in their heads for why teaming up together now is just a recipe for disaster and doomed to failure, this is on them. 

They were the ones who stopped this guy before, they were the ones who mistakenly believed he was dead and the threat he posed was gone for good.....which makes his dastardly return....dun dun dun.....unfinished business for them. Its personal. 

All the completely valid, well-reasoned and justifiable arguments for why its absolutely bonkers for them to try and make like the Dukes of Hazzard on this case as if they’re not at least a little bit miffed at each other for various things involving killing certain people and not killing certain people and trying to kill certain people and being totally unreasonable about the trying to kill certain people.....none of that is enough to get in the way of them doing their best to put all that aside for now and team up to stop this guy for good, the way they should have the first time.

Because let’s face it. One of the definitive areas of common ground that Dick and Jason share is when things are personal....they take it VERY personally. And when they feel responsible for something, like, you could get God on the phone to personally deliver absolution and assure them it wasn’t their fault, and they’d still be like “LOL yeah, okay, that’s a good one ‘God.’ Didn’t know all-knowing deities could be super hella wrong about things but hey, everyone’s allowed an off day I guess.”

Anyway.

Two brothers estranged due to extreme circumstances, trauma, loss, grief, blame, the completely unreasonable and frankly just rude passage of time, and assorted other reasons ranging from “you stole my favorite weapon-Bruce-definitely-didnt-know-I-had-and-kept-as-a-souvenir when I was fourteen and you STILL haven’t given it back” to “you can’t just shoot someone as your way of ending an uncomfortable conversation, Jason”......

But force them together via external situations or shared goals, and you have the perfect excuse to sidestep a lot of the more impossible to navigate conflicts born of comic book writers who don’t freaking know how to CHILL when piling on the family dysfunction......and engineer a situation where they pretty much HAVE to retrace previous footsteps, comb their memories for every detail they can recall about that case and in the process remember how close they were then, fall back into old patterns and rhythms while working together....and various other things that give you everything you need to transplant them mentally and emotionally to a time before all those conflicts and problems created by other people, not them, when things were....better. 

While through the mere fact they’re successfully able to fall back into old habits and patterns of working together at all.....you can put them face to face with evidence that despite how much they’ve both changed and everything that’s come between them, they are still fundamentally the same people they always were, and the shared experiences and common ground and all of that which enabled them to become brothers in the first place....its all still there, still able to be brought back out and dusted off and then used to forge a new brother bond that takes into account the ways they’ve changed since they last truly knew each other.

And none of that erases or solves the various complications and conflicts and issues that do still exist in the present, because of everything that’s happened in the past few years and the things they’ve all done.....BUT, it allows for Dick and Jason at least to rebuild or find a new, sturdy foundation on which to stand and plant themselves before wading back into all of that.....so at least now they do so with firmer footing, and with a clear direction and goal in mind.....navigating the emotional minefield from their respect opposing sides.....and aiming to meet somewhere in the middle.

And then with one family bond rejuvenated, revitalized and consciously reaffirmed by both of them......then its that much easier to turn their attentions to the rest of the family, one by one, and repair or forge those bonds through a concerted effort....not just Jason on the outside looking in, or members of the family on the inside looking out at him like he’s a poor, lost soul they need to save (I can’t help but picture Jason upchucking at the very thought, eww, how dare they)......but rather, a mix of both. Jason making his way back into the family via walking side by side with an ally on the inside who is still keeping pace with him so they can present a united front while they work towards a common goal they both want.....a family that acts like a family instead of like.....idk, y’know, that thing they act like in the comics that’s called ‘a family’ but also, they all hate each other and wish everyone else would die except for the times when they forget the others even exist at all.

Anyway. That of course, is just one angle that can be taken with them, out of the many possibilities that arise just from letting them have a good relationship before Jason died.....and all the shared history, in-jokes, secrets, camaraderie, grief, etc that comes with that.

My point is just.....I talk a lot rant a lot about the fanon and fic tendency to paint them as having barely known each other back then and with it largely blamed on Dick having been a stand-offish asshole because he has a chip on his shoulder named Bruce and its not a chip at all its actually Mt. Everest, yup, the whole dang mountain, yetis and all.......

And then I kinda just....keep it there on that and how much it bugs, because, y’know. It bugs.

BUT.

In keeping tunnel-vision locked on that and nothing else, I’ve never really expanded on the other byproduct of this fanon tendency that I think is worth considering:

And that’s the fact that this angle, this story? The one where Dick was a douche and Jason doesn’t really like him because of that until Dick apologizes for being a douche back then and begs for a second chance to do better, etc, etc? Its been told. Literally hundreds of fic writers have written that story by this point, and in the process limited...confined themselves, to this one singular possible dynamic between Dick and Jason when the thing is, like....that’s pretty much the ONLY story and angle that can result from Dick and Jason barely having a relationship before he died.....basically just various executions of acknowledging their previous lack of a relationship, assigning blame, making apologies and granting forgiveness, and then from there building a relationship from scratch. 

Obviously, people come up with unique spins on this all the time, I’m not saying the stories that do this are all exactly the same....just that there’s an innate ceiling to that particular premise, because when that specific dynamic of ‘no relationship really existed before’ is your one and only starting point......there’s only so many places you can go from that, and wind up in the present where you then proceed to have them make a relationship for the first time.

BUT. But but but but but.

The second you allow for the possibility that Dick and Jason DID have a relationship before ADITF, and it just happened largely ‘offscreen’ due to the fact that no solo Nightwing or Robin titles existed back then so there was nowhere to showcase just the two of them together......

You open up like.....so many more possibilities and angles and avenues and directions.

Because the thing is, y’know how so many people in fandom pride themselves on not feeling constrained by canon, or better yet, speak fondly about the idea of just taking a flamethrower to the whole damn thing and cackling maniacally while shouting “This one’s for Bruce/Dick/Jason/Tim/Cass/whomever your fave fam member of choice might be”?

Well. I mean. *spreads hands*

The second you flip the switch from “Dick and Jason barely knew each other and mostly didn’t like each other, this is the only canon that exists despite the fact that we just made it up because we could and canon can suck it”.....to.....”Dick and Jason did have a relationship and were close before Jason’s death, its just we never saw it develop on the page due to logistical constraints”......

Suddenly.....you have THREE WHOLE YEARS of possible interaction that you can literally cram full of WHATEVER YOU WANT, and canon can’t say a damn thing about it because its Schrodinger’s Adventures of Nightwing and Little Wing......without any canon viewing point set up to observe these interactions and thus force them into a singular form that you either like or you hate and set on fire.....those Adventures can look like aaaaaaaaaaaanything you want, and canon can kiss your patootie if it doesn’t like it!

Its three whole years of “lost family history” just waiting to be mined for all kinds of treasure, and you can unlock it in any number of ways once Jason returns, to any number of potential end points.

They could have faced villains together just by themselves during that time, they could have teamed up on investigations. They could have had sleepovers, Dick could have helped him cram for tests or covered for him when he just needed to take a mental health day because dealing with Gotham’s upper class can be exhausting and he doesn’t know how to explain that to Bruce in a way that won’t just lead to Bruce saying “I know, I get it, I hate it too” even though the ways in which its exhausting to Bruce and the ways its exhausting to Jason are not the same and not interchangeable.....but he doesn’t have to explain that to Dick, because Dick is closer to an understanding of it, he’s been there for a version of that himself, and they were assholes to him because of his lower class and unorthodox upbringing too.

You could have Jason tagging along on various official or unofficial Titans missions or just meet-ups, the way Jason teamed up with them for the Brother Blood story without Bruce ever knowing. Dick’s kid brother that nobody minded him bringing because they all adored him, and thus just by having him and Dick get along, you open the door to Jason having established dynamics and history with any number of Dick’s friends, allowing for a wide range of potential reactions to Jason and his Red Hood persona after he comes back.

You could have Jason being really invested in his brother’s relationship in Kori because he thinks Kori is just the fucking coolest, or you can have Jason secretly shipping his brother and Babs and thinking they’d be a much better match but keeping quiet about his opinion as long as Dick’s happy with Kori. You could have Jason panicked and turning to Dick for help and advice the first time he asks a date to one of his school’s formal dances, because he’s pretty sure he’d be able to provide actual proof that spontaneous human combustion IS possible, if he had to ask Bruce for romantic advice, like, aside from the fact that he’s seen flies trapped in amber whose relationships appear to advance at a faster pace than Bruce’s does with Selina, that’s his DAD, eww, he can’t ask his DAD to fill him in on what’s normal to expect and likely to be expected of him on this kind of/level of dating, but Dick? He can go to Dick for that, and imagine the adorbs potential. 

And the likelihood of various Titans coming up with the flimsiest of excuses to keep popping into the room in order to spy on the adorbs-ness, and the literal natural disaster that is the combination of Wally, Roy, Garth, Gar and Joey all trying to be ‘helpful’ and offer their own dating tips to Jason, while Donna and Lilith kick back with some popcorn while taking shots at the various boys’ expertise and credentials in this matter, if they’re gonna be offering advice to an impressionable young teen who doesn’t deserve to be saddled with having to learn from THEIR mistakes.

And on and on and on. Three whole years you can fill with any manner of adventures, secrets, shared stories, confessed ambitions and hopes and dreams for the future, commiserating on the parts of growing up in the spotlight in Gotham that Bruce just can’t relate to, sharing things from their pasts that they’ve never even told Bruce about purely because there are some things that are just easier to tell or talk about with a sibling close to your age than to your father.

But you see what I’m saying? Rounding Dick and Jason’s early relationship down to the barest bones until its practically being non-existent......that makes for a paragraph or at most a chapter dedicated to covering that ground, something that everyone pretty much expects to pop up in a story in order to address that history they have, or lack there of. And thus its never really a surprise to see it, there’s not a ton to take away from it, and it oftentimes ends up kinda just being filler despite even the best writers’ best attempts to make it engaging.....because there’s just not a lot to say about a relationship whose defining aspect is it didn’t really exist, and I’m pretty sure most writers would love to simply skip past that entirely and not even bother addressing it because it FEELS like writing filler a lot of times, I imagine. But at the same time, you kinda HAVE to include it and can’t really come up with a way to just leave it out entirely, without having a gaping hole in the meat of your actual story that explains how Dick and Jason got from there to here. Its a part of the story that everybody already knows, or expects.....but still demands being included, because canon just skipped over that entirely so there’s nothing from canon to even reference when shifting Dick and Jason into the kind of dynamic you want them to have or grow after his return.

And so its a paragraph or two paragraphs or a whole chapter that nobody really ever wants to write, because there’s not a whole lot of new ground to cover with it, and its kinda a cause for resentment, being stuck having to include it in every story covering Jason’s return anyway, even though there’s only limited ways you can stretch and exercise your creativity and expand on that particular angle.

But with Dick and Jason having an actual relationship pre-ADITF that is filled with nothing but whatever you choose to fill it with, whenever you feel like delving into it or dusting off an old memory or vacation or want to reveal some long-buried secret only the two of them know.....the sky’s the limit. Instead of that standard stock paragraph/chapter rehashing the take on that particular story that everyone already knows but narrative structure forces everyone to shoehorn in somewhere anyway.....there’s more than enough in those three lost/secret years of family history, especially specific to Dick and Jason, to serve as the basis for entire fics exploring that time, digging up secrets or mysteries that originated in that time, reminiscing about that time or diving back into existing dynamics with people Jason met through Dick during that time without having to write Jason meeting them or only getting to know them for the first time as an adult.

(Omggggggg, imagine a story that’s just Dick and Jason and Uncle Clark, or Dick and Jason and Aunt Diana, and like, Bruce is like I GO OUT OF TOWN FOR ONE NIGHT AND YOU SOMEHOW END UP WITH MY KIDS HELPING YOU FIGHT AN ALIEN/DEMON INVASION ON SOME OTHER PLANET/DIMENSION??? WHAT THE HELL!)

In conclusion, you hate canon and how much it fucks with the Batfamily? Totally with you. But this is the one period in these characters’ lives where canon doesn’t actually weigh you down or cage you in if you don’t want it to....instead it gives you the gift of being whatever the hell you want it to be, just so long as you make sure everyone ends where they need to be by the time ADITF happens. (Assuming you don’t just end up going full AU by that point since there’s no law saying Jason HAS to die or else the DC universe will destabilize and implode in upon itself).

Anyway, I’ve waxed poetic about this long enough, I think, and without a single line of poetry to show for it, but that’s for the best. Me to poetry is like a butcher to a carcass, but only if this particular butcher is very bad at his job and always makes a mess everywhere, and it just never ends well for anybody.

And now, as usual, I end an overly long post that exhausted my brain cells and made me sputter to a stop just before I come up with an ending to the post that actually makes sense and isn’t just me going, hey you know what, maybe there is something to be said after all for the Sopranos’ sty - 

[ryqoshay]

Tri-Arame: Study All Night?

Primary Pairing Trio: YuuAyuSetsu Words: ~2k Rating: G Time Frame: The end of their first week of college Story Arc: Setsu’s Ceaseless Study Session Study All Day? Study All Night? A Nap a Day

----------

Author’s Note: I’m hoping this all makes sense. My outline got a little disjointed as I patched together my main ideas, cut out excessive Endless Eight stuff and padded back in new - or old, in some cases - ideas along the way.

----------

Ayumu opened her eyes and was immediately greeted by the welcome sight of Yuu’s adorable sleeping face, barely a dozen centimeters away. Apparently, the routine had resumed last night as she remembered her childhood friend sliding in next to her after once again staying up with Setsuna.

So, did that mean the overly studious Setsuna had gone back to collapsing across the kotatsu? Ayumu hoped that wasn’t the case. Even cuddling next to Yuu on the floor was at least a better sleeping position than hunched over the table.

Ayumu sat up and found the raven-haired girl staring at her laptop. Wait, did she stay up all night?

“Good morning, Setsuna-chan.” Ayumu called quietly to avoid rousing Yuu.

“Good morning, Ayumu-san.” Setsuna replied before her breath hitched. “Morning?” Like the new day itself, the prospect dawned on her. She glanced frantically at the window where sunlight was streaming in, over at Ayumu and back at her screen where she leaned in, likely to ensure she was seeing the time correctly. Upon confirmation that it was indeed morning, she whined plaintively.

“Setsuna-chan…” Ayumu started.

“I’m sorry!” Setsuna interrupted. “I didn’t mean to! I just lost track of time. I just really wanted to finish another module, and… and…”

“You don’t need to apologize to me.” Ayumu said as she climbed over Yuu to the side of the bed. “Apologize to yourself. You look exhausted.” She wondered if she should point out the dark, puffy patches under the other girl’s eyes. “You should at least take a nap before going to the studio.”

“I, uhm… have the day off…” Setsuna explained. “It’s the weekend, so everyone is focused on Lives, and as this is my first week of classes, I am not participating.”

“Ah, well in a way that might be better for you.” Ayumu smiled gently. “Now, come over here and take my spot.” She patted the mattress, noting idly that she had previously been on the other side.

“Eh?” Setsuna seemed confused by the offer. “I-in your bed?”

“Mm.” Ayumu confirmed with a nod. “That way I can keep an eye on you.”

Pink started to dust Setsuna’s cheeks.

Ayumu chuckled at the adorable reaction. “Even if I make you leave your laptop here and send you back to your own room, I’m worried you’ll try to get in ‘one more module’ on your phone.”

“…” Setsuna’s expression made it clear that the thought had indeed crossed her mind.

Ayumu sighed. “What am I going to do with you…”

“I’m sorry…”

“ You don’t need to apologize. You’re not making me do anything.” Ayumu assured. “I’m doing this because I want to. You’re a very important, irreplaceable person in my life, Setsuna-chan.”

Setsuna drew in a quick breath as she recognized her own words being spoken back to her.

“And as such, your health and happiness are important to me as well.” Ayumu continued. “And you know, I’ve been keeping an eye on Yuu-chan for a while now; you’ve seen how bad she can be.”

Setsuna nodded.

“And it was easy because she lived next door. I wanted to do more for you when I started recognizing traits you shared with Yuu-chan, but until last week, you lived a couple stations away.” Ayumu smiled. “But now you also live next door, so I can do more.”

“But you shouldn’t have to… I should learn to take better care of myself...”

“Yes, but like I said, I want to help. Now, I know I can’t help you study, but I can cook meals. I can help with laundry. I can keep you company and maybe do a better job reminding you to take breaks.”

Setsuna scoffed ruefully at the last point. “You have studying to do as well.” She pointed out. “And you have dreams and goals just like me.”

“I do. And you and Yuu-chan have been incredibly supportive of me as I work toward them.”

“I don’t want to inconvenience you…”

“You’re not, I promise.” Ayumu shook her head. “But I want to support you two as well. And I’m only going for an associate degree and thus far, it has been fairly easy.” She explained. “I’m confident I will be done inside a year. But you and Yuu-chan are both going for bachelor’s degrees, which means a lot more work. And on top of that, you’re a professional idol now, which is amazing. Your dedication is truly awe inspiring, Setsuna-chan.”

Setsuna offered a small smile in response.

“But I’m worried you’ll burn yourself out at this rate. So, another thing I can help you with is maintaining a proper sleep schedule, but only if you let me.”

“You’re too kind to me, Ayumu-san.”

“Not at all. Now come on, before you collapse across the table, again.”

Setsuna blushed adorably but nonetheless, pushed herself out from under the kotatsu.

“You’ll have more room on the wall side, so you’ll have to climb over Yuu-chan.”

“Uhm, do you think Yuu-san will mind…?” She asked as she made her way over.

“She’ll be fine.” At least she was the other night…

“Alright…” Setsuna carefully crawled over the sleeping girl before turning so she could slip under the duvet.

“I’m going to go wash up, and I’ll make breakfast when I get back.” Ayumu explained. “I’ll put your portion in the fridge so you can reheat it when you wake up later.”

“Thank you, Ayumu-san.” Setsuna said, closing her eyes.

“Sleep well, Setsuna-chan.”

“…”

Wow, is she out already? Ayumu wondered. Heh, just like Yuu-chan. Idly, she reached over to brush a stray strand of hair out of Setsuna’s face. Immediately, Setsuna turned her head up towards Ayumu’s fingers. Wait, is she awake? Ayumu withdrew her hand and the other girl settled back down as though nothing had happened.

Out of curiosity, as well as a desire to see that adorable reaction again, Ayumu reached out a second time. This time, she ran her hand gently across the top of Setsuna’s head. Again, the response was immediate and Setsuna pushed up into her palm.

Cute. Too cute. It’s like petting a cat. Ayumu thought to herself as she patted more while Setsuna let out a content murmur.

“Mmm… Ayumu?” A sleepy voice came from under her.

Ayumu froze.

“What are you…” Yuu trailed off with a lazy chuckle as she apparently noticed what was going on.

“I-i-i-it’s not what you think!” Ayumu protested, trying to keep her voice down to not wake Setsuna, who she assumed was actually asleep.

“Setsunyan’s being spoiled by Ayumu… Nyo fair… Yuunyan wants to be spoiled too.”

Ayumu felt her chest tighten. Even though she knew Yuu was intentionally playing things up, she found the act absolutely adorable. And despite also knowing her face was burning, she moved her other hand to Yuu’s head.

Yuu hummed her approval and pushed up into Ayumu’s palm in a similar manner to how Setsuna had reacted moments ago.

It was a little awkward, leaning over the two girls, but Ayumu decided she could maintain it for a little while longer. After all, seeing their cute expressions far outweighed any discomfort the position posed. Ayumu smiled to herself and continued petting Yuu and Setsuna affectionately.

----------

Setsuna jerked her head back up after it had started to lull forward. She shook her head briefly and blinked a few times in an effort to stave off a growing fatigue.

“Ready to turn in, Setsuna-chan?”

“Mm?” Setsuna’s attention was drawn to the other girl sitting kitty-corner to her.

“I’m about ready.” Yuu continued. “We should go to bed and get a good night’s rest.” She started to push herself out from under the table. “C’mon…” She motioned toward Ayumu’s bed where the redhead as already sleeping.

What? Was Yuu inviting her to join them? Setsuna felt her pulse quicken. But…

“I, uhm… let me finish this module, first.”

Yuu raised an eyebrow. “Alright, but don’t take too much longer.” She pulled up the duvet and started to slide under. “I’ll leave room for you.”

Setsuna’s heart continued to pound against her chest. Sharing a bed with Ayumu and Yuu… It was like that classic manga trope, There Is Only One Bed, except unlike the trope, nobody involved was unwilling.

Or were they?

Ayumu had invited, or rather instructed, Setsuna to sleep in her bed earlier that day… or yesterday, technically, she corrected as she realized the time. And Yuu had already been there, but Ayumu herself hadn’t joined them. Sure, she had to get ready for class, but, wait, no it was Saturday, she didn’t have class. She could have slept in. Did she not want to join them?

Did Ayumu not want Setsuna to join her and Yuu tonight… this morning?

Ayumu would be fine with it, right…? Maybe? But what if she wasn’t?

Setsuna couldn’t ask Ayumu for her permission as she was already asleep and there was no way she was going to inconvenience her by waking her up just for that.

She found herself gazing longingly at the bed where her two best friends, no, the two girls she loved, slept. She wanted to join them. And Yuu had even offered. And yet…

The seeds of doubt had been sown well over a year ago and had thus developed stubborn roots. She had managed to cut them down when they sprouted, sometimes even with their help. But she lacked the courage to address the roots, worried that in doing so, she would potentially prove that she was indeed coming between Ayumu and Yuu.

Over the last two years, Setsuna had grown close to Yuu and Ayumu, far closer than one would reasonably expect for a normal friendship. Nothing had been declared officially among them, but Yuu, and just recently Ayumu, had repeated her own words back to her, claiming her to be a very important, irreplaceable person in their lives.

For all practical purposes, their triangle seemed different than those so often portrayed in anime, and Setsuna desperately wanted to believe it to be true. However, she was too afraid to find out for sure. And if there was any grain of truth to the anime series, Setsuna would be the one to succeed in winning over one or the other, while their childhood friend was left behind. But she knew she couldn’t do that, not to them. She would rather let them be happy together while she moved on.

Setsuna closed her laptop and pushed herself out from under the kotasu. Then, with one last glance toward the sleeping couple, she quietly made her way to the door and slipped out, hoping the light from the hallway wouldn’t wake them.

She trudged the few steps down the hall to her own room, unlocked the door and stepped in. Her legs felt like they had weights attached to them as she moved toward her bed. Ayumu was right, she really needed to get her sleep schedule under control.

Collapsing into her bed, Setsuna was immediately aware of the clean scent, or rather the lack there of. Of course, she had cleaned everything last weekend, but she hadn’t actually slept here since. She remembered growing up thinking freshly washed bedding was the best but now it felt different, almost… sterile? Was that the right word? Whatever the correct description, her bed stood in stark contrast to Ayumu’s.

This wasn’t to imply that Ayumu’s bed was unsanitary by any means. Setsuna was aware that the other girl washed everything as often as necessary; Ayumu was quite skilled at housekeeping chores and keeping track of that sort of thing. But her bed smelled like her and Yuu. It was warm, cozy and felt lived-in… or slept-in as the case was. It basically just felt better.

Perhaps… maybe she had chosen wrong in not accepting Yuu’s offer.

But she couldn’t go back now, even if she wanted to. Not only would she risk waking them, but she lacked the energy. She could barely muster the strength to pull her blanket over herself.

With a sigh, Setsuna closed her eyes and let herself slip into a deep slumber.

----------

Author’s Notes Continued in Followup Post

[wingedwarren]

  ❛  oh fuck, i can feel you doing it around my cock. i can feel you – that’s it, baby. fuck yourself on me.  ❜   //cuz he could still be tied down or up....

@meretrixious   ||   meme

     they talked about it. joked about it. remy whispering he wanted to do this a few times and warren, never one to shy away from challenges or from a bit of verbal banter, had dared him. try it, lebeau. see how far you get.      they’d gotten close a few times, inching just a little bit closer to the roles reversing, the goal being the winged mutant to be the one to be laid bare and getting ravished for once. wandering hands, slick fingers in the heat of the moment, or in that warm glow afterwards when warren wasn’t as keen to jump right out of reach. remy purring sweet bullshit that made warren feel way too much like a fucking girl so it was just met with huffing and ‘shut up’. but they both knew where this was supposed to be going, and remy didn’t seem to want to let up on that goal. fucker.

     apparently tonight had been the night. after months of hooking up, casual stuff that was free of any strings for both so it was comfortable, low expectations, no reason to be cutesy about anything they did or didn’t want. they knew what to expect from the other. usually that meant remy was absolutely prepared for warren to blow his mind with sex he’d feel for a few days afterwards.      this time it was different.      the mood, for starters. it wasn’t awkward exactly, and it was probably just a lucky moment on remy’s part to catch warren in a mood that contributed to the situation at hand. just a quick text to know they were both in the same area and twenty minutes later war had been sitting on the balcony of his hotel room, looking a little heated but like an absolute vision. jeans tight, a thin cotton shirt with geometrical print under his leather jacket, the collar popped up. he could show up in anything and make it work, they’d found. but he put effort in tonight, and remy was more than welcoming.      from the get-go it was clear where remy wanted to go with it. and though warren was more than skilled at changing those plans, make the other crave him crawling over him and make him feel exactly why they hooked up so often, this time... he wasn’t doing any of that. he let remy peel his jacket off, kiss his neck, pull the shirt from his jeans to slip open the buttons. hands sliding across his skin, never pausing at the scars but halting when fingers caressed along warren’s new little additions. oh, he’d been more than a little thrilled when he found the piercings, grinning into the hollow behind warren’s ear and making even the angel get a little red on his cheekbones with a well-placed comment about them.      he’d had a surprise for warren. newly purchased. he’d been excited to show him and warren caught on instantly when remy tossed him the bundle of hemp rope, a deep blue colour and he knew immediately there’d gone some research into it -- it was strong, sturdy rope that definitely came from one of the better suppliers.      and warren was always down for a little bit of tying up, of course.

     he’d let remy perch and pose him, undoing his belt so he could work him out of his pants, his underwear, even his socks had to go -- no, keep the shirt on. it’s cute. i promise i won’t get anything on it. warren had no shame in his nudity when he was put on the bed and the other went to work on his ropes. a harness first, hands careful as they drew warren into it, tying until the rope was flat against his skin everywhere, knots in the right places and remy feeling rather pleased with the way he’d put warren’s... assets on display. the nipple jewelry was definitely a good choice.      then his arms. a simple tie to bring them together behind his back, attaching them to the back of the harness. he watched warren pull on them, the way the skin chafed against the rope, how the muscle moved under it in attempts to pull free. no such luck. there was an edge inside warren he tiptoed right that moment, knowing he couldn’t run now if he wanted to, and it showed in his eyes when remy sat on the bed in front of him. was this what he wanted to to? right now? he swallowed thickly.      remy looked hot. shirt undone, jeans open but without letting everything hang out -- warren definitely enjoyed the view. at his hand winking him closer, the angel started awkwardly shuffling over, wings making it surprisingly difficult to keep his balance. thankfully the room wasn’t all that big so in absolute case of emergency he could dig his claws into the cheaply tiled ceiling for support. once he was where remy wanted him, though, the hands on his thighs kept him steady enough to no longer worry about it.

     ‘so pretty,’ remy’d said, making warren grunt with disagreement. ‘don’t say that shit,’ he replied, but all it got him was a hand so close to his face that for a moment he thought remy’d be into choking -- but no, thank fuck he wasn’t. just a touch to shut him up, thumb tracing his bottom lip, pulling just slightly to expose his teeth. like appreciating a beast, something untameable that he’d somehow gotten his hands on. a trophy.      then warren had been subjected to a slow handjob, edging him a few times until his head leaned back, lips wet with saliva and the hotel room filled with panting. that was when remy’d switched tactics, grabbing the lube he’d put on the nightstand for preparation, and when his hand traveled over warren’s thigh to his backside, their eyes met. both hungry for this encounter, remy’s asking silent permission for this next step and warren’s heavy with challenge. it was always risky with him, this moment. sometimes he’d dare remy and the second fingers came even close to him, there had been biting, pulling away to flip remy around on the mattress and take control the way he liked to do.      but he couldn’t quite do that this time. his breath stilled when remy rubbed at him, last chance to back out, warren -- and then eyes squeezed close, brows furrowed and his expression a grimace when two fingers pressed inside him. reluctant. nerves. nostrils flaring. he didn’t like this. he didn’t like that he felt strung out already, everything inside him so tightly wound that it was exhausting.      then there was a soft press of lips to his own, a silent apology and promise they could stop whenever warren wanted. it did little to soothe him, but oh, a soft sound escaped him when remy paired the invasion with other administrations. tongue and teeth on warren’s throat, a warm hand stroking his erection to help him distribute his focus. the fingers moved, aware of the squeezing each time he went in to the last knuckle, but even that faded with a bit of effort. he just needed warren to relax, to figure out that remy wouldn’t subject him to something he hated.      and it wasn’t that warren hated this. he did, but not because it wasn’t pleasurable to him. he just... god, he expected pain around every corner, degrading words to add salt to the wounds. he had a high tolerance for that kind of bullshit, but not when he was tied up and all he could use to say no were his words. words weren’t his strongest feat, after all.

     ‘are you ready?’ remy whispered to his neck, nibbling at him, tasting the salt on his skin, and warren’s confirmation was breathless, a little wheezy. the quiet moment of being left alone while the other worked on everything he needed left warren in a bit of a daze, tumbling between wanting this and wanting to give a jerk of his body until he was on the floor, claws digging at the hardwood under him. thoughts were right about the spiral out of control when remy was right back with him, touching his body, fingers toying with the ring through his nipple to get his attention back to the present. tugging a little to get him to sit up on his knees, give remy a bit of space to finally push his pants and boxerbriefs down.      warren didn’t even look. knew he’d probably chicken out if he did. but with closed eyes he listened to softly whispered words of comfort, the slick sound of remy getting himself ready as well. sucked in a breath when remy’s hand rested on his waist to make him sit back down, feeling him against the curve of his buttocks, eagerly rubbing up to him. fingers hooked into the front of the rope harness to lean the angel forward until remy could trap his lips in a kiss, much more desperate from warren’s end in a search for validation while he felt the hand around him press remy’s arousal closer to him.

     and then remy pushed him back to sit up. slowly. and warren couldn’t bring himself to make a single sound at the intrusion, which also at least meant no complaints for once. no witty remarks, no mean comments to let his personality shimmer through discomfort.      when he was back upright, god, he couldn’t quite find his breath. his adam’s apple bobbed in the faded light from the bedside lamp, chest shimmering with sweat, and a soft, choked sound lingered on the tip of his tongue. only a slight shift of remy under him, the light adjustment of the angle and the drag of him inside warren finally allowed the blond to drag in a rough gulp of air, chest heaving against his restraints. no doubt he was beautiful to watch like this, wings knocking against the ceiling in search of a way to let out everything that was twisting inside him.      to test the waters, remy gave a slow push of his hips upwards and the noise that dripped from warren’s wet lips was something sounding completely foreign to them both, deep and throaty and hoarse. a hand curving around him was all he needed and then remy’s chest was painted with white streaks, the last spurts dribbling lazily along his wrist. oh.      both hands ended up on warren’s thighs, fingertips digging into the straining muscle and plush flesh to guide him, find a rhythm until warren caught on. his head lolled back forward and his blond curls were sticking to his forehead, feet tucked under remy’s thighs for leverage when the pressure of the hands eased so he could move the way he wanted.      it was a slow rhythm. slowly up and slowly back down. no rush at all even if he felt a pang of shame whenever he ground down and could feel remy pulsating inside him. how far were they going to take this? did he want to... did remy want to...? how did he even put it into words without feeling absolutely disgusting? it wasn’t completely unpleasurable, that was for sure, but it was just... not warren’s thing. this. being on the receiving end. was this how others felt with him? that couldn’t be right.      eyes opened faintly when remy spoke up to see his jaw tighten. that wasn’t a face of disgust. warren had seen plenty of those and this wasn’t it. his hips changed angle and the next time he slid down over remy, his eyes shot wide open and he jerked on top of him, knees pressing at the other’s sides and a thread of saliva dripping down from parted lips.      ‘fuck,’ warren croaked, hunched over. remy under him took the next moment to push up with his hips, making that same sensation spark through warren like electricity, prickling all the way from behind his eyes down to the very tips of his toes. and remy was laughing softly down there, doing it again until warren was squeezing so tight even he let out a chuckling ‘ow, ow, stop, don’t do that --’. it was painfully obvious that warren had never been subjected to this kind of pleasure, quickly building up already.

     the ceiling was already ruined, claws having pushed through the tiles to find the steel skeleton hidden there to hold onto with his claws, the material already ever so lightly deforming under the pressure.      ‘just breathe,’ remy told him, hand stroking the curve of his torso, feeling the skin ripple from how he was leaning forward, but then he did it again and warren just couldn’t, a whine as a reply to his ridiculous request. warren didn’t feel ridiculous very easily but like this he definitely did: face red, the blush blotching on his neck and chest, and he couldn’t even find the action he needed to take to stop drooling, mouth feeling dry and a throat like sandpaper.

[delimeful]

(dont) take this the wrong way (2)

Day 24: Blood

warnings: fear, panic, miscommunication, blood, injury

sequel to day 11: underwater!

-

Logan exhaled as the mer agreed to his proposed deal, some of the tension falling from his shoulders. It was a reasonable calculated risk, pulling the wire mesh away and freeing the mer’s mouth, but a primal part of him still grew nervous at the sight of the stranger’s sharp fangs. 

Most normal mers subsisted on seafood diets like many creatures in the ocean, but as overfishing forced them closer and closer to populated areas, there were quite a few cases of mers luring humans over to slaughter and eat them, sometimes even becoming serial murderers. The uneasy mermaid before him may have been tiny compared to the giant mers, but to Logan, he was a few feet larger in body, and still posed a significant threat. 

Luckily, the mer wasn’t an idiot and agreed to work with him, which was a relief, seeing as getting captured by a supposedly extinct giant siren had thoroughly thrown Logan off and he could use all the assistance he could get. He looked over the netting, noting that it was digging harshly into the mer’s skin and scales in several places, sometimes even drawing blood. 

“Can you ask them to retrieve supplies to stop the bleeding?” Logan asked, and the mer glanced at him incredulously from where he was half-propped up on the ground.

“What?” He hissed through his teeth. 

“We need to stall, and you need your wounds treated. You can speak with them, right?” Logan explained, raising an eyebrow. 

The mer glanced at the giants, looking back to him with an expression that spoke volumes before shaking his head as much as he could. “I’m not demanding anything from giant mers! That’s how you get yourself killed. They want to eat us.”  

“I can only sit here pretending to investigate this net for so long.” Logan could feel the gazes of the giant mers sitting heavy on his shoulders. “Look- what’s your name?” 

The mer eyed him suspiciously for a long moment, in which Logan exercised considerable patience. “... Virgil.” 

“Look, Virgil, we need them to be distracted, and the best way to do that is to send them off on tasks that they think will get them to their end goal faster. I can’t talk to them, so you’re going to need to pass on my messages.” He explained, eyes flickering to the side when one of the giants shifted closer. 

That raspy, clicking language started up again between the two, their voices deep and resonant, and Logan had to shake himself to keep his thoughts from drifting. Virgil’s frill-like ears flattened against the sides of his head, and his shoulders shook with barely-concealed panic.

“Calm down.” Logan told him. “Breathe deeply with me, okay? Try to tell me what’s going on.”

After a couple of deep breaths, Virgil managed to pull himself together to translate. “They’re wondering if there’s something wrong. Roman- The shark mer asked if they should try to find a different human instead.” 

Logan’s heart rate rose, knowing what the most likely outcome would be if they deemed him useless. He shifted to the side, beginning to sort through the tangled mess of frills and netting at the end of the mermaid’s long tail. 

“What are you doing?” Virgil asked indignantly, voice layered with a low hiss. Logan carefully shifted some netting away. 

“I’m untangling the ends of the net. If you can’t speak with them, this is the only option that I have to buy time without getting eaten.”   

“You-!” Virgil narrowed his eyes at him, the slit pupils shrinking. The tail in Logan’s grasp flicked, and Logan frowned as it increased the bleeding coming from a torn fin. 

“Stop that.” He scolded. 

“You stop that!”

“I am not going to be discarded like an edible pair of broken scissors because you can’t bother to demand something from the giants who are going to eat you anyways if you don’t!” Logan said, grabbing the sinuous end of the tail and planting it firmly in his lap again for emphasis. 

Virgil glared back at him viciously, but to his surprise, the next words he spoke were in that other language. The giant mers both looked to him with surprise and then happiness, as though he was a cute puppy that had done a trick, and Logan frowned as the siren ruffled Virgil’s hair with a finger, making him brace like his head was going to be taken clean off. 

He cleared his throat, forcing himself not to shrink back when the two huge, predatory gazes fell to him instead.

“Can I get those medical supplies, now preferably?” He asked, a bit snappy. 

-

“He… uh. He wants to know if someone could retrieve some stuff to treat wounds?” Virgil managed to offer weakly when the two giant mers turned back to him for an explanation. He shot a petulant side eye at Logan, who looked entirely unrepentant. He was lucky these two didn’t understand human tongue, or the human would really be screwed, speaking so arrogantly.

To his surprise, both mers brightened at the concept of actively doing something for their captives. 

“Oh, I know where to find some herbs that might help!” Patton offered eagerly, and Roman nodded. 

“I believe something sharp to cut the net with would not be amiss either.” He grinned, putting that terrifying mouth of shark teeth on display. “Race you!” 

In a heartbeat, the shark mer vanished underwater with a splash, and Patton let out a shout of protest before quickly diving after him. The waves created from their quick descent bounced against the walls, the only noise for a long moment. Logan pulled his gaze from the water to Virgil. 

“Did they just…?” 

Virgil nodded slowly.

“And so now we're...?” 

Another nod. Logan adjusted his salt-encrusted glasses, closing his mouth with a click. 

“Well. In that case, this might not be as impossible as I thought.” He quickly began to pull at several weak spots in the netting, managing to unravel a fair amount, even getting an entire arm free, but it really was badly tangled. Virgil tried to help but ended up gasping in pain as a harsh tug tore at his side gills. 

“If only I had my pocket knife…” Logan muttered, and Virgil didn’t bother to inform him that if Logan had come at him with a sharp object earlier, Virgil probably would have gone for the jugular. 

Wait. Sharp? 

“... Screw it.” Virgil muttered, and reached up with his one free hand to his mouth. He tested the strength of a few of his front layer of teeth, and then grasped one at the base with his sharp claws and pulled. 

Logan made a faint noise of horror as the tooth came loose with a grunt of pain, and then recoiled when Virgil shoved the fang at him. 

Virgil growled impatiently. “Any day now!” 

The human finally sprung back into action, sawing at the netting and managing to cut away the most tangled bits until Virgil was finally free. He shoved the last of the wires off and dove for the water immediately, sighing in relief as his dry gills were soothed and blood washed away as he twisted happily in loops. He never thought he’d get to feel this again! 

Soon though, he was forced to remember that they weren’t out of the reef yet, and the giant mers could return any moment. He returned to the surface, where Logan was peering out over the edge of the water. He jumped when Virgil’s head popped up, and set a hand on his chest. 

“You’re here. I thought…” He trailed off, face pale, and Virgil abruptly realized how his abrupt departure must have looked. The human didn’t have a way off this rock shelf, so without Virgil’s help he was stranded to wait for the two giant mers- the ones that wouldn’t be too happy to find one of their snacks missing. Honestly, leaving him would even be the smartest thing to do to get away quick, but Virgil wasn’t a total jerk.

“Uh, sorry.” He offered, awkward. “Got a little excited.” 

Logan shook his head. “...No apology needed. How are we getting out of here?” The siren had brought him into the cave by sealing his hands around him to create an airtight bubble, but Virgil could hardly do such a thing at his size. 

Virgil reached a webbed hand up. “I’ll pull you. You just have to hold your breath for as long as you can.” 

Logan nodded, beginning to breathe deeply to oxygenate his blood. When he was ready, he reached out and grabbed Virgil’s hand, taking a deep breath and holding it.  

Virgil wasted no time in pulling him under, and with a flick of his powerful tail they were off, leaving the cave empty and silent behind them.

[danyka-fendyr]

Absence of Good - 6

Chapter 6: Take Your Troubles and Double Them

Okay so it’s a long time coming but here it is! I took so long writing this because honestly I was just super burned out and dreading writing it. So a part of this was written in small increments, but then today I actually wanted to write, so I sat down and -imagine this- just wrote it. Now I know I just did a fic where characters get injured but well... If two characters are two halves of a whole, the perfect yin and yang to each other, when the one gets hurt should not the other also get hurt? ...and I needed it for plot reasons because we’re finally to the point in this story where I’m storyboarding. Anyway, I hope it’s up to snuff since I actually edited this time.

Taglist: @dreamwritesimagines @rhabakoli

AoG Taglist: @pancakefancake @prettyboyspenerrr @youreasnack @alioop3818

Wordcount: 

Warnings: Extremely dark themes. Violence against children. Death and murder. Death of children. Torture. 

“Perhaps the greatest faculty our minds possess is the ability to cope with pain.”

-Patrick Rothfuss

           You were sitting in the bullpen, working on not working. Technically you were supposed to be writing up reports, but it was early April and everybody had spring fever. There wasn’t a single member of the BAU who was actually doing what they were supposed to except maybe Hotch.

“Hey, Garcia, I’ve got a fun fact for you,” you said.

“Am I going to like it or is it about serial killers?”

“You’re going to like it.”

“Then fire away!” Garcia beamed at you.

“Did you know that the average human needs at least 8 hugs a day to maintain oxytocin levels?”

Garcia looked like the cat that ate the canary. “So what you’re saying is…it’s actually beneficial for me to declare group hug time!”

Immediately she latched onto you with an enthusiasm that could only be achieved by one Penelope Garcia, and with a glare that dared the rest of the team not to come join in.

Some people might be surprised that Spencer was the first to join, but the people who knew him knew better. While the Doctor might seem stiff and awkward from afar, once he got comfortable with people he could be quite warm and affectionate. It just might take a few months or…years. Either way Spencer had no reservations about snuggling into you, and his head was a surprisingly good fit on your shoulder.

It didn’t take the rest of the team long to join in, cocooning you in an envelope of human warmth.

“Does this count as my eight hugs for the day since there’s like, a dozen people hugging me right now?”

“There are exactly 6 people hugging your right now and no,” Spencer said. “It has to be chest to chest contact to count as a full hug.”

“So this counts as no hugs?” You asked, disappointed.

“Don’t worry sugar plum, I’d be more than happy to provide you with an unlimited supply. Whenever you need a hug you just let me know,” Garcia said, patting you on the head as the group hug disbanded.

Not a moment too soon either as Hotch walked in to announce a new case. Nothing like murder to raise your oxytocin levels.

 Hotch made the briefing short and sweet, as he always did. There was a series of child abductions happening in Pennsylvania, which meant time was of the essence now more than ever.

“This unsub is escalating at a rate we couldn’t have possibly foreseen. He’s quickly getting desperate and has already shown himself to be deeply unpredictable. Amongst his victims is now 22-year-old Alicia, a nanny to one of the children he abducted. This unsub will go through anything or anyone to achieve his goal, and the murder of Alicia Bennet shows no signs of remorse anywhere in the body positioning or methodology. Wheels up in 10.”

You could feel the panic hit you like a shot of whiskey, burning in the pit of your stomach. You tried to control it though. Panic always came with this job, but it was harder with unsubs like this. Fast moving and unpredictable and ruthless. Something in you knew before you ever stepped foot on the jet that this one would haunt your nightmares.

Spence noticed your distress immediately, finding it in the jittery way you grabbed your go-bag and the shaking hands that made you a cup of tea on the plane before you sat down by yourself to think while the rest of the team brainstormed. After giving his contributions, he was quick to join you.

“It’s eating you alive, isn’t it?” He asked.

You looked up at those soft brown eyes and knew there was no use lying to him. He always knew exactly what you were feeling. You communicated in a language you didn’t even know, in the quirk of his mouth and the skim of his fingertips and the curve of your spine and the whispers of your breathing. A tacet tryst all your own.

“I don’t like time crunches.”

He accepts that as an answer and an end to the conversation. Except there is never an end to your conversations anymore. The silence just stretches into a requiem of every word between the two of you, a living, breathing thing still. Which means there is nothing awkward about you interrupting it, because the conversation is still going.

“Do you ever wish you’d just…taken a gap year? Or several gap years? You certainly had the time.” You laugh a little bit.

Spencer’s answer is fast enough that you know already what he will say.

“I thought about it once. After everything with my Mom…I almost did.”

“So what stopped you?”

“Well I brought up the idea to my Mom and her reaction was basically that I would give up what I loved over her dead body.” Spence huffed a smile, looking at you out of the corner of his eye. “What about you? You had the time to take a gap year too. Why not?”

You leaned back against the smooth leather of the jet seat behind you.

“I thought about it. When I was 16 I had this brief ambition to take a gap year to be an occupational therapists assistant.”

“That’s not even a real gap year!” Spencer elbowed you teasingly before going serious again. “So why didn’t you?”

“Well to say my parents thought it was the worst idea I’d ever had would be an understatement. I pitched them the whole scheme, you know? I would go and get my associates degree and then I could use that to get the job and train for a year then help pay my way through college while I was getting my psychology degree. They said that if I stopped for a year though I would never go back to school and get my bachelor’s and then it would all be a waste. So, here I am.”

Spencer was quiet for a moment, thoughtful as he always was. “I’m sorry you weren’t able to go after your dreams.”

“It’s okay. I’m happy to be here, so it all turned out for the best.”

Hesitantly, Spencer’s hand came to rest over yours on the armrest. “I’m happy you’re here too.”

You turned your face away from him, but you were unable to stop your eyes flicking back to him, your breath coming too fast for a different reason now. There were certain lines that coworkers just didn’t cross, and you and Spencer…you had been skirting those lines for quite a while. This was just a new way to push the limits.

 You should have known right away that it would be a bad idea to try to go undercover. There was a reason you didn’t go undercover in your line of work, the reason being it was stupid. But the best way to catch this guy might just be to masquerade as a nanny for a child that you were almost certain he would target. What made you so certain? Well, she was his after all.

Eventually, Garcia had pieced together enough clues to determine that your killer was a Mr. Derek Mayner and that he had a young daughter who had been adopted by an upper middle-class family. Her mother had hid her existence from him, but you could only assume he had found out since the girl’s mother had been killed when she was only two in a way that fit your killer’s style all too well. Unfortunately for Mayner but fortunately for Gina, his daughter, he was put in prison shortly after that for drug possession and a series of other crimes including aggravated assault and a few other more minor charges. Once Garcia discovered that it was easy to draw a connection between the girls who looked eerily like Mayner’s daughter, as well as Alicia Bennet’s resemblance to her mother, the chilling cherry on top of this case.

Gina’s adopted parents had agreed to let you pose as a nanny, as the other option was leaving their daughter almost entirely unguarded against her serial killer father. You had been the obvious pick from the team as you were the only one who was young enough to be a truly believable nanny. And who would suspect sweet little you was hiding a gun inside your purse?

In theory, everything should have gone off without a hitch. The adopted parents would go out for dinner at the same time they always did on Saturday, their standing date, leaving you with Gina. You would be wired, and so when the unsub broke into the house trying to abduct the sweet 4-year-old girl in your care you would speak your codeword and the team would come back you up while you got Gina to safety.

In theory, the unsub didn’t take you by surprise.

In theory, the unsub didn’t come out of nowhere and shove you into a glass coffee table.

In theory, your mic didn’t break.

In theory, you didn’t get abducted with a 4-year-old girl you were supposed to protect.

Everything was better in theory.

 You came to groggily, trying to gain your bearings. Everything hurt but breathing especially. The first thing you realized was that you had probably broken a rib. Well, not you. Derek Mayner had broken your rib. Wait…the unsub. Where was Gina?

You looked around in a panic, causing a sharp, stabbing pain to shoot through your chest before you caught sight of her. She was slumped unconscious just off to your right, and it looked like her tiny little body had been drugged. Something to keep her docile while Daddy dearest kidnapped her.

She stirred slightly, coming out of her drugged haze slowly. She blinked up at you with wide chocolate colored eyes for a moment before quickly bursting into tears. That was bad. That was very bad.

Before she could attract her father’s attention, you quickly pulled her into your lap, holding back a scream from the pain in your ribs.

“There now, it’s alright sweetheart.”

You doubted you looked like it was alright. You could feel the scratches littering your face and body, and you were sure there were some shards of glass stuck through your arms, fibers laced through your face. It didn’t get better when you failed to calm her.

“Take your hands off my daughter.” Mayner growled at you, slamming the door open.

“I’m just trying to calm her do-”

“I said take your hands off her!” He screamed, reaching around her to hit you.

The blow landed weakly, but the pain of it was increased by the injuries you had already sustained. It jarred Gina out of your arms, which only made her cry harder, her distress increasing. Mayner roared, furious.

“Look what you did!”

That was when your pain really began.

He dragged you out to a barn at the edge of the property, an abandoned house he had been keeping you and Gina in. Grabbing chains that implied a sickening amount of premeditation and perhaps more kills than you had given him credit for, he strung you up from the rafters, your toes barely dangling from the floor. With your broken ribs, the agony was unspeakable.

Mayner’s past kills had been fast, more business-like than most of the unsubs you dealt with. His primary focus had been getting his daughter, and his aggressive tendencies took a backseat to that. Now that he had her though, he was free to explore. And explore he did.

It seemed like the pain was never ending, exploding across your body. In the back of your mind you noted that it probably meant something that Mayner’s preferred weapons were knives, and he really liked stabbing. You clung to that, trying to escape to a different mindscape.

In your head, you were on the jet, discussing a case. Your case, since apparently you could only get so far removed from your current situation.

“Impotent, most likely,” Rossi said casually.

“That would explain the stabbing, but not the daughter. You think his impotency happened in the two-year gap where he was in jail?” Morgan asked.

“It’s possible.” Emily leaned forward in your mental rendition of the jet. “That would explain the obsession with his daughter. As far as he knows, she’s the only child he’ll ever have.”

“That makes sense. A man’s children are his legacy, and a man like Mayner would be obsessed with taking control of that.” Hotch nodded.

Mayner dragged the knife up your side, and your mental vision blurred red hot. You tried to focus, tried to bring it back, but it hurt. Gosh, it hurt so bad. You scrambled for any memory you could reach, any happier, higher place. Your brain supplied you with an unexpected one. You remembered Spencer telling you a story of when an old unsub he and Hotch had interrogated in jail tried to kill them. Spencer had talked him out of it by asking one simple question.

You took a jagged breath. “Do you want to know why you did it? Why you killed all those girls?”

Mayner froze, and a wild hope sprang up in you.

“I mean, that’s not like you, right? You’ve committed a lot of crimes, sure, but you’re not a murderer.”

If you could just string him out long enough, the team would come for you. You knew they would. They had to.

“I did it for my daughter. You wouldn’t understand.”

“But I think I do understand Derek. Because you didn’t have to kill all those little girls. But you did it anyway, didn’t you? And you liked it, right? I can tell you why if you just put the knife down.”

“What would you know about me? You’re just a nanny.” He spat in your face.

You tried to hold back your disgust, not to let any weakness show. “I’m a psychologist. I work for the FBI, and I was assigned to go undercover and protect your daughter. And do you know why they picked me? Because they knew, they knew that I would understand you Derek. That I’m the only one who can.”

“What do you know about me?” He demanded, lowering the knife ever so slightly.

“I know that it started with Gina’s mother, right? She was the first person you’d ever really killed. And when you did, there was such a rush, wasn’t there? You would do anything to get that kind of high again. It was better than the drugs, better than anything you’d ever done before. So then you wanted to do it again. But more than that, you wanted your daughter back. So what did you do? You went after your daughter, like any good father. But in the process, you couldn’t control your appetite, could you? You had to kill. But you could have killed anyone, anything. So what do we have to ask ourselves now?”

The barn exploded, and you could have cried with relief.

“FBI! Put the knife down now!” That was Morgan’s voice, strong and authoritative.

Derek didn’t put up much of a fight. Sure, he liked murdering people, but he also liked staying alive. You had broken before he was even cuffed.

Tears poured down your face, the excruciating pain and relief washing over you.

“Get me down,” you begged, a mantra rolling out of you over and over again. “Get me down. Get me down.”

It was Spencer who raced to your side, gently extricating you from your chains. Who caught you as you collapsed, yelping in pain.

“I need a medic here! Now!” Panic laced his voice, and you dimly registered that you had never heard Spencer this afraid before.

“G-Gina, is she?”

“She’s fine. Just breathe, okay? You’re going to be okay.” Spencer’s warm hands cupped your face, and you realized you were freezing.

“I’m, I’m okay Spence,” you tried to say through stuttering breaths. “Don’t worry about me.”

“Medic!” Spencer’s voice was a frantic demand now, but it was getting dimmer.

You vaguely registered Mayner, begging you for an answer as Morgan dragged him away.

“Why?” He asked. “Tell me why.”

You coughed, which hurt, but seemed to come secondary to the hot blood dripping down your chin. Summoning up all of your remaining strength, you looked Mayner in the eye in a last act of bravado.

“I have no idea.”

Then you passed out.

 You came to for the second time in what you guessed was 24 hours, except this time you were in a hospital wing.

“Mmmm,” you murmured quietly, shifting in your bed. “Is that morphine I feel?”

You heard Spencer chuckle to your left. “Actually, it’s fentanyl. They tried to give you morphine, but I convinced them fentanyl would be better.”

“And by that he means he bullied the poor nurse into giving you the good drugs,” Garcia said from your other side.

You laughed weakly, but that definitely still hurt. Guess the drugs could only do so much.

“Okay Penelope, you’re going to have to stop being funny now because that hurt.”

It seemed you had unintentionally caused the blonde distress as tears sprang to her eyes and she leaned forward to give you a very gentle makeshift hug.

“Oh, I’m just so happy you’re okay! Spencer’s been sleeping in hospital chairs for the past two days and we were all so worried! About you, obviously, not him, although we were kind of worried about him too because he already slouches so much and-”

“Spencer!” You frowned over at him. “Go home.”

“No.”

“Yes. You’ve been sleeping here for two days? That’s insane. You’re going home and you’re going to take a bath or shower, whichever you prefer, and then you’re going to eat some real non-hospital food, and then you’re going to sleep for 9 hours in a real bed.”

“I’m not leaving you,” Spencer protested.

“Which was all well and good when I was asleep and flirting with death, but now I’m awake and I feel fine. Which means you need to go take care of yourself.”

“But what if they try to give you morphine instead of fentanyl? Or what if they don’t run the right tests or they miss something that I would have seen or what if-”

You precariously turned so that you were facing him better, wincing slightly as you did so. “Or what if you went home and rested and let Garcia and the rest of the team take good care of me, and then you came back tomorrow?”

“She’s right, boy wonder. In your current state of delusionalness, you wouldn’t be able to catch anything the doctors supposedly missed anyway. Come on, I’m having Morgan drive you home.”

Before he could complain further, Penelope ushered him out of your hospital room, leaving you alone with the strong scent of hand sanitizer and latex gloves, under the bright white lights that were sure to give you a migraine if you kept staring at them. So you turned to the only other option left. You closed your eyes, stopped staring at the cursed lights, and went to sleep.

“Pain and suffering are always inevitable for a large intelligence and a deep heart.”

-Fyodor Dostoevsky