#the poor special effects from time to time is just something i expect and sometimes enjoy if they fit the story

[thenotoriousscuttlecliff]

There are those who like Doctor Who sincerely and those who only like it ironically and just want it to be perpetually low budget so they can laugh at the poor FXs.

[kuro4thegays]

- Kaveh NSFW alphabet - A, D, I, S, V, Y

[Kaveh x gn!reader]

[Content: bottom reader, just smut]

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

He's such a gentle lover, it's expected that he would be good at aftercare. He would most rather just keep his dick snuggly buried inside of you and cuddle you to sleep, but if you need something he'll immediately be jumping onto his feet. It's really no problem for him, in fact, he doesn't think he'll be able to sleep soundly if he denied you such a request.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Has and will draw you naked. But you already know that, he has asked you many times to pose for his anatomy studies, usually with no clothes, but that’s no secret. You might have noticed that he doesn’t let you, or anyone really, lay a hand on his sketchbook and he has his reasons, the biggest one being that he doesn’t want you to see the… sticky pages. Listen, long nights away from you are doing something to him, sometimes he has to just use whatever he can work with. 

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)

Very romantic. I’ll go into more detail further on, but for now the only thing that you need to know is that the two of you won’t be having sex that often, but when you do, he has to go all out. Maybe it might be his sense of guilt for leaving your needs unattended for so long, but oh God he just can’t help himself but try to make the moment as special as it could be. Worshiping your body, kissing you all over, maybe even lighting candles. Do you want a massage, he’s onto it. Do you want him to go slower, no problem. Do you need him to kiss you more, his lips are already all over you before you can even ask.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Yeah, he can’t handle more than a single round. Don’t get him wrong, he absolutely loved it, but it seems like his body is just about to give up on him. He is just so sore and tired, let the poor man alone. Don’t worry though, because his first round was passionate enough to satisfy both of you. He needs to make up for all the time the two of you have lost.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Very, VERY loud. You’ll need to physically shut his mouth if you want him to stay quiet. But he can’t help himself when you’re making him feel so good, he can’t keep it all in. Whines a lot definitely, maybe even whimpers. And his voice certainly gets higher at least a little bit. Though watch out, you just might be getting a noise complaint after one of your sessions.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

I imagine that his libido is pretty low, after all, depression and alcoholism don’t have a good effect on the sex drive. That said, he is an attentive partner. Let’s just say that he’ll need a bit of, um, encouragement from you.

Just a little something to keep you waiting while I write the next part of my ongoing Aventurine fic.

[blackmoonlightexpress]

About the mixed response in China & why I think TTEOTM will prevail in the end 💪

Saw the "Badly Received in China?" post earlier and thought to share a longer take on the situation in China, why are there so many antis, and my own predictions on its future.

First, a clarification, TTEOTM has been an massive hit in China. The data speaks for itself in every way you can measure commercial success: viewership, platform membership, app downloads, social media heat index, advertisements, merchandise sales, unintended tourism GDP contribution. The drama has shattered records and outperformed all the recent xianxias, which you'd never dare to expect for a drama with no dingliu (顶流) that airs exclusively in the dead April slot on a platform that's 3rd (sometimes 4th) amongst online streamers. (Some day I'll create a master post just on the stats.)

The only area it falls short on is critical response. It's not just the low Douban rating (opened at 6.x and now dropped to 5.6). The three Bs - Douban, Weibo, and Bilibili (which you can think of as China's IMDB, Twitter, and Youtube) were full of attacks against the show. This included trending topics on how the actors looked (LYX too thin, BL looking old/big/overshadowed by CDL, CDL 照骗 not looking as good as in photo) as well as allegations of plagiarism and drama behind the scenes between cast & crew members. A lot of people watched video edits that twisted the facts and had a poor impression of the drama and even left 1/2-star reviews on Douban without ever watching an episode. (This type of brainwashing is more effective than you'd think. I've been reading a lot of negative posts about the Little Mermaid movie and almost caught myself writing something negative about it without ever watching.)

As all of this unfolded, I kept asking myself, why all the smearing? Who is behind it? And why TTEOTM in particular?

A lot of what appears to be normal user activity is driven by water armies, marketing accounts, and "black" hot search ranking, all paid. This is all backed up by photo evidence captured by netizens. It comes down to commercial interests of rival platforms, productions, actors. This actually happens to every drama that is threatening in some way (almost a proof of success), but TTEOTM attracted more anti $$$. Why? For one, it's seen as the secret weapon that could elevate Youku's status as a 3rd/4th player to a close 2nd to rival and even at times overshadow Tencent. It's no coincidence that, Bilibili, which is owned by Tencent and has way more daily active users than Youku, has promoted hate videos and limited the traffic of fan videos - at some point not even recognizing the drama's Chinese title in search results. (Bilibili used to be a haven for LYX fans and a platform LYX has partnered with extensively. This flipped 180 degrees since he no longer has any unaired dramas with Tencent.)

TTEOTM is also a target for rival productions. It's got big name stars with solid acting reputation, one of the hottest IPs, and high anticipation from all the promotional materials - they've been super loud in letting everyone know that they have better costumes, special effects etc Meanwhile, there's a massive pipeline of unaired xianxia dramas that stick to the old formula and will likely feel dated after people have watched TTEOTM. People even started questioning how some productions with bigger rumored budgets ended up with cheaper-looking promotional materials, costumes, CGI (read: embezzling). So if you've invested in xianxia 101, you'd really want to discredit TTEOTM and stop people from watching it.

But there's also rival fandom jealousy, which is almost worse. Someone asked which fandom is behind it, I would say everyone. There are only so many "resources" to go around in the "entertainment winter" and it's a zero sum game. LYX and BL are both already big stars but still not at the top yet. They are big enough to threaten the dinglius, but not big enough to be accepted as having "made it" by other rising stars. E.g. Yang Mi, Yang Zi, Xiao Zhan receive a lot of hate too, but it's less realistic as a prospect to bring them down. In contrast, the smearing of Bai Lu actually kind of worked. (And I'm really talking about the fans. The actors probably leave it to their agencies/companies.)

Other fandoms are especially bitter in this case because TTEOTM really upset the status quo and commonly accepted truths in a way that kind of discredits everyone else. A lot of the below have been used by fans of dinglius as excuses for when a drama doesn't perform:

Youku is a rubbish platform and Youku exclusive web dramas will never have high viewership

It’s impossible for an actor to break out twice within the same genre

An actor can only develop a big dedicated fan base with CP marketing

Breakout hits are always unanticipated dramas that come out of nowhere

Autumn/Spring is a dead slot. Hits can only come out of the summer and winter holidays.

IMHO A lot of the intense hatred comes from long held beliefs being proven wrong. LYX has always been thought of someone who’s borderline A list and B list, yet the opening viewership of TTEOTM is like double that of dramas led by bigger stars. It would have been less threatening if it started low and slowly gained traction because the drama proved to be good. But the initial hype speaks to the market power of a LYX xianxia, so a lot of people wanted to see it fail and looked for faults everywhere.

Moreover, because TTEOTM had an explosive opening, it did not have enough time for word of mouth to develop before people started bashing it. If you look at Douban ratings, shows that fewer people watched tend to have better reviews because only fans bother to rate it. Starry Love and Back from the Brink, both harshly dismissed as flops by the industry, both have >7.0 on Douban. Meanwhile, people love to hate on a show that is receiving a lot of hype - suddenly they are held to completely different standards even if the budget is similar. Why are people more accepting of the rise of Dylan Wang and Esther Yu in LBFAD? In the end because the expectations were pretty low. They were able to build up a fan base while no one was watching.

Finally, TTEOTM does have lots of production problems, some of their own doing and others not their fault. Either way this left the drama less defensible in the face of scrutiny or tucao (吐槽) culture. The production is very ambitious and took risks, but did not deliver everywhere. It's got parts that look like a blockbuster film and parts that look like a B grade TV show. I personally did not like some of the editing, lighting, cinematography, color grading, special effects, makeup. AND this is precisely the type of production details Chinese viewers LOVE to fixate on. Meanwhile, compared to western viewers, they are more forgiving about things like mediocre acting, dubbing, slow pacing, repetitive tropes or storylines, uninteresting characters. (I think this has something to do with cultural differences around rewarding perfect execution over innovation/risk-taking, sum of the parts over parts that carry the sum.)

And then, there are creative choices that are daring and controversial. These are not problems per se - for every viewer that hates it, someone loves it because it's different. But this perhaps explain why its score has dropped further, even in non-Chinese platforms like MDL, even amongst fans of the show. For example... (spoilers ahead)

Opting for a bad/open ending, knowing that it'll upset some fans, but sticking to it because they feel that it protects the overall integrity of the story (no deus ex machina). Of course, most viewers prefer a happy ending. It would have been easy to just give people what they want. The screenwriter doesn't even have to come up with a new ending for god's sake! However, almost every xianxia that has come before has resurrected the lead character after the big climax. Viewers have been making fun of the cop out: What's the significance of life and death if everyone just reincarnates?

Packing lots of details in a fast-paced, highly complicated, non-linear plot, trusting viewers to be engaged enough to use their brain, rewatch, and discuss outside the show (a bit like Christopher Nolan films). The downside of this is that it's hard to edit out a scene. There's also high risk of viewers getting confused and complaining that the plot makes no sense. Even though most things do if you go several layers down, some rightly point out that they just want to be entertained and the drama should stand on its own.

Making this a male lead centric (大男主) drama, which is rare in the xianxia genre that more recently has targeted young women exclusively. The story shifts from focusing on LSS's mission to TTJ overcoming his fate, perhaps at the expense of the romance (a criticism I see a lot from viewers looking for a pure love story). However, for context, viewers in China (including CCTV itself) have been complaining that the xianxia genre has lost the "xia” (heroism). It's gone from Chinese Paladin, which is about ordinary people overcoming odds to become heroes, to stories that are just about pretty people, who happen to be gods, falling in love since the success of Eternal Love and Journey of the Flower. TTEOTM brings the focus back to "zero to hero" character development, so this is also a change that many welcome.

Allocating a crazy portion of budget and screentime to superhero fight sequences. I agree with all the critics who say these scenes don't add much to the story, the B roll looks better without CGI, and they could have kept other scenes instead. BUT guess which scenes I find myself rewatching and showing off to friends the most? Episodes 14, 15, 32. Because it is thrilling and glorious. Plus after enduring so many Marvel films over the years, I'm pleased to see a version that's genuinely Chinese (not some pan-Asian BS), rooted in our philosophy and martial arts tradition, featuring Chinese faces that have real kungfu training.

Going over the top on aesthetics - colorful costumes, hair accessories, and heavy makeup. A violent reaction against the simple pastel aesthetics that have dominated xianxias over the years. Of course, lots of people hated on the eyeliner and found the extravagant visuals distracting.

However, even with all its flaws, I'm glad it aired and did not wait for perfection. (A lot of May dramas did not go live last minute due to "technical problems" i.e. government censorship. These days, airing = success.) In addition, I predict that over time people will come to appreciate TTEOTM more. Here's why:

1) A lot of dramas now widely lauded as classics started out with poor ratings. Over time, the noise will die down and make way for what really matters - compelling acting and story. Empresses in the Palace (2011) opened with a Douban rating of 2.7 out of 10 (yes, this bad). Viewers didn't like the casting choice. They thought the actors looked bad. There were also issues with the costumes. Over time, its rating increased to 9.4. It's now a show rewatched so loyally that data analysts use its viewership to track market size. Similarly, a lot of the issues people have with TTEOTM are superficial. The things that matter most like acting are good, and even if you dislike the story and editing choices, it did manage to keep 70M people watching and engaged till the end, incl. people who don't watch a lot of TV or like this genre.

2) Moreover, when people look back or rewatch, they tend to focus on just the highlights, and TTEOTM is full of memorable scenes. There are also so many standout memes/gags (出圈梗) that will live in our cultural fabric forever. Fans on Douban were surveyed on who they would have chosen as the director instead and still overwhelming "rehired" Kuk Kok Leung. Biases aside, I think people realize that you could have a better executed drama overall - higher production value, greater consistency, more attention to detail, BUT you might also lose a lot of the things we loved. I don't know if another director would have allowed TTJ go full creepy/evil/weak in the first few episodes or filmed all the steamy love scenes without a modesty backlight. TTEOTM feels so different because it breaks ALL the rules (see above) that I'm not sure if dramas in the future will try to replicate. If they do, TTEOTM would have started a trend. If they don't, TTEOTM will remain the only option.

3) Only dramas that inspire passion will stand the test of time. There are plenty of dramas that score well but don't inspire passion - they will fade away over time. The TTEOTM fan community is intense - there's so much discussion and engagement everywhere. Its Douban group is the #3 most active ever (measured by # of comments). Its MDL page has 68K comments, highest of all aired CDrama. Its Douyin topic has close to 29B views, highest of all costume drama. (Interesting to note that TTEOTM has an excellent reputation on Douyin, the platform with the most active users and least amount of toxic fan activity.) Fans have spent >25M RMB on merchandise, an unprecedented amount - 3M RMB on a character that appears for <10 mins (OG Devil God). It's got to have done something right because this is way more buying power than the fans of LYX and BL combined. And in my N=1, I've not been this excited about a franchise since Game of Thrones and then Harry Potter.

Bottom line, you might have liked it, liked it with regrets, hated it... but if you're spending the time to read this post, all the way till the end, you've become a luna-tic (or 烬神病人)!

[wrenrogue]

The first time Kenma heard Kuroo’s laugh, he thought is was the loudest most annoying thing he’d ever heard.

It was bizarre since his new neighbor had been really quiet up until then, quieter than him. So it took him by surprise when Kuroo guffawed with glee when the dirty volleyball landed in between his arms covering his sweater in muddy water, instead of bouncing off them like intended.

Kenma didn’t think much of it until Kuro only got louder with time and so did his laugh. He would laugh at everything, including when their volleyball would accidentally smack him in the face during practice.

It was annoying. Kuro was annoying. Kuro and his laugh were annoying.

And as they grew up, Kenma got to see Kuro annoying everyone else with his obnoxious donkey laugh. How he had a hard time staying quiet sometimes from finding something too funny. How he would get scolded by his grandmother for his laugh-induced coughing fits and almost throwing up on the furniture.

How Kuro had a phase where he invented himself an evil laugh and pretended to be evil around their neighborhood. How despite being “evil," when he accidentally broke his neighbor’s flower pot, he apologized profusely and took out his life savings (1000 yen) to try to buy her a new one.

And then Kuro met Bokuto.

Kuro honestly was polite, perceptive and had a high sense of self-control when he wasn’t laughing his ass off being a bastard to a poor victim. Kenma would’ve ditched him long ago if Kuro was just a high energy party animal with non-existent tact.

Somehow Bokuto loosened his self-control a bit too much though. They were loud together, had a ton of fun doing so too. But Kenma just wanted to play his games in peace and it was hard with Bokuto hey hey heying and Kuro’s taunting happening right beside him.

Kenma was truly the most miserable teenager in existence; he wondered if his misery would ever end. And then Kenma met Akaashi the year after and he thought he finally found solidarity in knowing someone else was plagued by their louder friends being idiots together.

What he found instead was Akaashi radiating the gay in massive amounts whenever he was around Bokuto that Kenma’s gaydar shattered irreparably. Kenma once told Kuro this, and like expected he turned into a hyena.

Kenma thought it wasn’t all bad when this happened, that Kenma was responsible for making Kuro laugh so loud. That he created that joy for him.

Kenma can’t really say Kuro’s laugh was always obnoxious. Because there were good things about it too. Like how Kuro’s eyes would crinkle at the edges or how Kenma was always flashed with all his pearly white teeth from that big mouth of his. Or how he’d turn red from laughing way too hard for way too long.

How Kuro, despite having a loud-as-fuck laugh, also had many other ones that were quieter, but just as effective. Like when he snickered at Kenma’s quips to other people and how he giggled at every joke Kenma told him. How sometimes his laugh was infectious and Kenma had no other choice but to laugh too.How Kuro had this particularly quiet breathy laugh that Kenma wasn’t sure how to describe, but that it was nice to hear anyway. How Kenma was many times the reason for that laugh to begin with.

The year Kuro’s gone to college, things didn't get any quieter, but the loud things weren't things Kenma liked to hear. Kuro’s laugh had always been obnoxious, but Kenma’s grown to kinda like it. If only because it belonged to Kuro.

If only Kuro was there to laugh at him for being so sappy. But he was far away and studying for tests instead of bothering him to practice a new special move near their bridge.

Kuro called Kenma that night out of the blue telling him he had the urge to bother him. “you’re not bothering me” kenma had said prompting a chuckle, something he missed hearing.

“how are you?” Kuro asked

“I…(miss you) played metal gear today”

“haven’t played that in years, let me borrow it next time I’m home”

“when will you be home?”

“aww kenma-kun misses me"

“shut up. my mom asked me earlier”

“riiiiiiight”

“i’m gonna hang up now”

Kuro cackled from the other end, and somehow kenma’s heart grew a little lighter.

Kenma joins Kuro at uni and their routine intertwines as is the nature of their friendship. But there’s a problem.

The thing about Kuro is that he was kinda objectively good-looking. Kenma wasn't dumb, he’d seen the entire student body ogling him from afar.

it’s kinda hard not to when Kuro was so tall, well built with a handsome face and even though his hair was always stupid, it looked good on him. Kenma was kinda mad at that honestly. How his childhood friend grew up into such a dreamboat with a foghorn attached. If he would’ve known sooner, he would’ve ditched him immediately.

Kenma thought this even more when his stomach wouldn't stop flipping like a pancake when Kuro started guffawing at his own corny jokes during breakfast, because since when did he find Kuro's laugh so attractive???

It gets worse. And it gets worse, and the years keep coming and they don’t stop coming. and Kuro's laugh gets more attractive and Kenma would just like to kiss him to shut him up once and for all. But he can't. All he could do was let the butterflies destroy his stomach as he stared dreamily at his best friend when he wasn't looking. He thinks he likes staring at Kuro more when he’s busy working on his things.

He was currently trying to apply to the JVA, said he wanted to make sure everything was perfect so Kuro was hunched over his laptop updating his linkedin account and kenma like a fool, watched as Kuro stuck his tongue out in concentration as he typed out his credentials, how he would randomly squint and make faces at whatever he was concentrating on, how he had a pen behind his ear despite the fact that he didn’t need to write anything down. How he was still in his pjs because he had stayed over at kenma’s house again and was too lazy to find any of his other clothes in kenma’s closet.

And kenma couldn’t handle seeing all that so he got up, only to come back to slide a plate of cut up fruit next to his best friend, because he hadn’t seen him eat anything since noon and he needed to eat.

Kuro turned to look at him, asked him “What for?” and kenma only shrugged. In response Kuro gave him a quiet breathy giggle and thanked him for the snack. kenma knows then that he’s completely head over heels fucked.

When Kuro gets the phone call that he got the job at the JVA, Kenma was there to see the glee write itself all over Kuro's face as he thanked the caller for giving him the opportunity.

He was there as Kuro joyfully celebrated his success, how he was loud, how Kenma couldn't help but celebrate too. How Kuro picked him up to twirl him around. How the excitement got to him enough that when he was back on the ground, he didn’t let Kuro go, instead bringing him down at eye-level to tell him “You did it” and kissing him on the lips.

Kenma’s not sure why he hadn’t thought of doing that sooner. He thinks Kuro’s laugh tastes sweeter than he imagined. Kenma’s not exactly sure when his own laugh got so loud. He thinks it’s probably Tetsurou’s influence.

Though he finds that he doesn’t really mind, especially when he laughs along side him as they reach more milestones together. Like when Tetsu became a staple in his streams, that they end up having a segment together. Like when Tetsurou kissed him feather light down his neck just to tickle him. Like when Tetsurou proposed to him the same day he was going to propose to him too. Like during their wedding and Tetsurou somehow got cake in his hair.

Like when they got a bigger house together and their friends helped them paint each room and lev got paint all over his face. Like when Tetsu lets their daughter give him makeovers and she makes sure his cheeks are as pink as possible. Like when their son learned to walk and immediately learned chasing their cat was a fun pastime. Like when Tetsu lets him hold him in bed while they giggle at how long it took them to get together.

Kenma remembers thinking Tetsu’s laugh was loud and stupid. He still thinks so, but he wouldn't want it any other way. Especially when he gets to experience all other laughs Tetsu has to offer, including the shy little giggle he does when kenma tells him he loves him before kissing him quiet.

[electronickingdomfox]

"Battlestations!" review

Novel from 1986, by Diane Carey. It's a direct sequel to Dreadnought!, so obviously it should be read after that. Specially since this one assumes certain familiarity with Piper and friends, and the events are the aftermath of Rittenhouse's ploy in the last book.

I've grown fond of Piper's gang, and there's again plenty of humor in her observations. She has been promoted to Lt. Commander in the few weeks since the dreadnought incident, which may seem a bit unrealistic… But okay, I can suspend disbelief at that, considering the importance of her achievements (many of them accidental) in the previous novel. Piper is still an emulator of Kirk, constantly impressed by him and worried about falling short of his expectations. She shows a certain ruthlessness, though, specially now that she has a bit more authority, and has to deal with the dilemma of being a superior (and sometimes pushing people too far) or keeping her friends. It's obvious that she hasn't yet mastered the delicate balance that Kirk has with Spock and McCoy. The other characters are pretty much the same, and there's been no significant development with them. Only that Scanner plays a greater role this time around, and Sarda's loyalties are put into question.

This was a fun read, and very action-oriented, though I liked Dreadnought! better, which had a more interesting plot and villain, besides the benefit of being a new perspective.

Spoilers under the cut:

The story begins with Piper, Kirk, Scotty and McCoy on an old schooner, playing Pirates of the Caribbean with another sail ship. And everyone hates Kirk's idea of a shore-leave. Piper suspects that Kirk has something planned for her, since he brought her along. Effectively, Kirk tells her that they're en route to take command of Piper's new shining spaceship, docked in some place of the Caribbean. But as it's often the case with Kirk, things aren't just that simple. A bunch of Starfleet Security agents board the schooner and take Kirk and Scotty away, to testify in a case of espionage and stolen technology. It appears that Sarda, Piper's Vulcan friend, has defected and plans to sell some Federation secret to the enemy. Understanding her role now, Piper hides from the agents with McCoy, and knocks them out, so they can't impound Kirk's ship.

They escape sailing to the docking bay, where Piper's new spaceship awaits… And sure enough, it's a shining piece of junk (and the ship drawing included in the novel makes it look as comically shitty as you can imagine from the narrative). Piper finds her old friend Scanner working on the ship and installing all kind of improvements, including a powerful tractor beam. He says the ship will be serviceable, even if made up of cannibalized parts. Piper, Merete and Scanner get aboard (alongside poor McCoy, who just stays there ignored by everyone), and depart to San Francisco to help Kirk and Sarda, whom Piper refuses to believe a traitor. However, the new ship (called Banana Republic or Tyrannosaurus Rex, depending on who you ask) has plans of its own, and takes them out of orbit, towards Argelius. It turns out that Spock had been tampering with the computer, and had some very specific destination for them. Piper refuses to be a passive pawn for Kirk, and pressures Scanner to deactivate Spock's programming. Of course, Scanner can't override Spock's work, though using a loop in logic, Piper finally convinces the computer to restore manual helm. Satisfied with being in control again, Piper sets course for Argelius anyway.

Midway in their trip, they're approached by Spock in a shuttle, and take him aboard. Spock comes dressed with the outfit from "Errand of Mercy" (to go unnoticed in Argelius), and has similar disguises for everyone (much to McCoy's dismay). But Spock is also dismayed when he finds out they deactivated his programming. Then he explains the situation. Three scientists that worked for Rittenhouse: Dr. Mornay, the Vulcan Perren and Sarda himself, have stolen the transwarp device intended for the dreadnought. Now they plan to sell it to the highest bidder in Argelius, thus creating a lot of political tensions between warring factions. Their mission consists on separating the three scientists to thwart their plans. A fourth scientist involved, Dr. Boma (formerly the racist Lieutenant from "The Galileo Seven"), is cooperating with the Federation and currently at the Enterprise. Spock warns Piper that Sarda may no longer be the same man as before; he has taken Perren as his Vulcan master and developed a very intimate bond with him, so he could have fallen under his influence. Piper reminisces about her friendship with Sarda, first forged during an Academy training that looks a lot like the Hunger Games, minus real deaths (and this passage drags way too much, in my opinion). The key to their success back then, was communicating through old radio waves, which gives Piper the idea of broadcasting them in Argelius, to inform Sarda of their arrival.

However, upon reaching the planet, they're met by a reality-distorting flux. Apparently, there's been an accident down there with the transwarp device, and all scientists could be even dead. Anyway, they beam down in disguise, and use a cantina as base of operations. Piper has to perform an Argelian dance as part of their cover, but she sucks at it and enrages a bunch of Klingons. A barroom brawl breaks out, but Kirk comes to the rescue. He left behind the Enterprise to draw less attention, though the starship is also under way.

In the meantime, Sarda has received and answered the radio waves, so they locate the scientists' hideout in an abandoned farm. Piper and Scanner infiltrate the compound while Kirk and Spock arrange a diversion to distract the guards (the diversion being a herd of pigs running wild). However, Piper and Scanner are soon captured by Perren, who puts them in a detention cell. Piper also meets briefly with Sarda, who explains that he only cooperated to ensure the safety of the device, since they were going to steal it with or without him anyway. They manage to escape the cell once Kirk and Spock start causing explosions all around the compound, but they're too late; Mornay has captured Kirk and Spock, and is beaming up with them to the just arrived Enterprise. McCoy informs Piper of what's going on in the ship: Boma turned out to be a traitor after all, and gassed the whole crew with a dangerous narcotic, while Mornay plans to first test the transwarp device by mounting it on the Enterprise.

Sarda finally shows his allegiance to Piper, and they all beam up to Rex. There, they apply a powerful tractor beam to one of the Enterprise nacelles… until it bends at a fucked up angle, so the villains can't escape at warp speed. Poor Rex is also fucked up with the effort, so they all transport to the Enterprise. While McCoy and Merete search for an antidote to the narcotic gas, Piper and Sarda storm into the bridge and capture Mornay and Boma (this final confrontation is a bit anticlimactic; I feel that Mornay could have been an interesting villain, but she doesn't get much to do in the end). Perren, distraught with Mornay's radicalism, chooses to join the good guys and cooperate. In the meantime, McCoy finds a cure for the gas, and the crew starts waking up. However, a whole lot of ships have arrived to claim the transwarp device: Klingon, Tholian, Romulan, and so on. An all-out battle erupts between the Enterprise and the other ships, until Federation reinforcements arrive.

In the end, all is well, and Piper is again a crewmember of the Enterprise, after sacrificing her first ship. Though she has to endure Scanner showing everyone a holo of her Argelian dance. And on top of that, Scotty wants to have a talk with her, about what she did to his poor wee bairns!

Mcspirk Meter: 2/10*. Piper notices on several ocassions the silent understanding between Spock and McCoy or Spock and Kirk, where no words are needed and they seem to communicate with just a look. She envies this bond, and wishes she had something similar with Sarda.

Also, there's something going on between Sarda and Perren. Their master/pupil relationship, the frequent mind-melds, the bond that is so intimate that Spock won't talk about it… Sarda is torn between going after Piper or Perren, so strong is Perren's hold on him.

[adamwatchesmovies]

Kung Fu Hustle (2004)

At first, Kung Fu Hustle looks like one kind of comedy: a spoof of period-piece martial arts films. You know the ones. They have these wildly exaggerated villains with demonic martial art skills, heroes with abilities that defy gravity but can only be unlocked once they achieve inner peace - while craving revenge -, a small population of hopeless wretches that need a savior and wild stunts - all of which are taken very seriously. At lampooning this genre, it’s masterful. We get many big laughs. And then, something changes. Suddenly, the movie becomes something else that recontextualizes everything you saw before…

In 1940s Shanghai, the notorious Axe Gang have the police in their pocket and everyone cowering. The only people who escape their attention are those linving in slums too poor to be worthy of their attention. In Pigsty Alley, petty crooks Sing (Stephen Chow) and Bone (Lam Chi-chung) attempt to extort the residents. To their surprise, everyone from the Landlady (Yuen Qiu) to her husband (Yuen Wah) to the tailor (Chiu Chi-ling) to the baker (Dong Zhihua) and the labourer Coolie (Xing Yu) turn out to be master martial artists. Humiliated, the Axe Gang retreats but it’s only a matter of time before they re-appear.

I listed the Landlady and her husband as expert fighters but this might not be the accurate description. This movie abides by its own set of rules, rules that seem to have been inspired by the Looney Tunes. Maybe the Landlord of Pig Sty Alley has super special skills. Maybe it was just funnier to have someone survive a fall from the top floor and shrug off being pummelled by their wife. When characters run, their legs turn into spinny circles with feet on the border. These slapstick laughs are a match made in heaven with kung fu movies. Sometimes, director Stephen Chow goes for the crass and juvenile jokes but most of the time, the writing is clever and subversive. The first scene has Sing attempt to pick an opponent from a crowd to show how tough he is. He keeps choosing someone who could obviously beat him and it's so good.

Kung Fu Hustle leaves you wanting to see more. What I mean is that it contains obvious references to popular film you’ve definitely seen - The Shining, Spider-man, The Matrix Reloaded - and others you haven’t because you’re just getting started with the martial arts genre. You’ll hear a line, you’ll see a detail in the background that makes you go “I bet you that’s a nod to something”. Sometimes, these Easter eggs can come off as the director showing off. Here, it displays a love for movies, an invitation for you to check out other pictures Chow loves so you can come back to "Kung Fu Hustle" and get the joke. You’ll want to, particularly once you see the big revelations this film has in store during the conclusion. You thought Kung Fu Hustle was just a parody but it’s also an homage. It loves the films its referring to and while making fun of them - in a way that’s never cynical - it also is one of those films. There’s so much to like.

If there’s one criticism to mention, it’s the special effects. Several have not aged well and look quite fake. Almost… cartoony. In a more serious film, it would be a big deal. Here? It’s almost part of the joke to have stunts no one could ever do in real life look completely unconvincing. At times, I even wondered if this was deliberate. Probably not but this movie is smart enough that it may have recognized its limitations and found a way to turn them into strengths.

Kung Fu Hustle is consistently hilarious, imaginative, lovingly crafted, thrilling and smart. I didn’t know what to expect going in but it blew me away. (Original Cantonese with English Subtitles, January 1, 2021)

[stardust-in-my-mind-blog]

rambling prose practice - autism

My anxiety has been a three-pronged trident for the last month concerning the appointment I went to today. It's funny how life unfolds with the help of unexpected blessings, like my general practitioner. She's around my age and has been there for me through it all—the highs of getting into my master's program, the lows of having to leave due to the resurgence of childhood trauma triggered in a class ironically titled Adverse Effects of Childhood Trauma. Through my experiences with brainspotting and extensive therapy, she helped me return to school in just three months. And then, she gently but firmly made me realize I couldn't keep battling myself to reach some elusive "normal." Normal. What even is normal? I've never fit into that box. ADHD seemed to explain part of it, but something was still missing... My husband and I have been separated for some time now. Despite our efforts to salvage what we could, our paths diverged further as we both changed profoundly. The season of our life together has ended, and now I'm taking steps to find a new place to live. It feels different this time—we might even share a lawyer, a stark contrast from my previous experiences with divorce and custody battles. I refuse to return to the place where I overextended myself until I burned out completely. I can't force myself into roles or situations that no longer fit. Instead, I'm embracing the discomfort and finding a bit of relief in rediscovering my authentic self. I'm realizing now that I'm easily overstimulated, a realization I once mistook for fear. Sometimes, I almost wish it were fear—it seems easier. But when someone disrespects me now, something inside me shifts, and I'm tempted to engage in dangerous games of my own. It's a work in progress.

I've also learned to be more direct about how I feel now, especially when something is negatively impacting me. My fear of burnout and meltdowns outweighs any other concern. This has made it easier for me to communicate when I need a break and to regulate my nervous system. I'm highly sensitive, but with space and time, I can pinpoint what's upsetting me and avoid projecting it onto others. My past experiences haven't all been supportive. The last time I mentioned autism in a professional setting, the therapist laughed at me. He reacted similarly when I brought up Jung, and his behavior was unsettling, to say the least. This left me feeling unsupported and invalidated. Because of this, I came prepared for today's appointment, scripting my dialogue and considering bringing my journals and evidence to validate my experiences. I expected to be dismissed or laughed at again, and the anticipation of this brought tears to my eyes as I write. Instead of skepticism, my doctor asked me why I wanted to pursue this autism diagnosis. I explained that I also believed I had ADHD, but previous therapists never truly saw or understood me. Their assumptions didn't match my reality, and their advice left me frustrated. It was triggering to feel so misunderstood despite my efforts to explain myself clearly. I shared with her my childhood obsessions with dictionaries and thesauruses, how I found solace in the forest and my imagination instead of friendships. Living in this world often felt like a poor imitation for which I was constantly punished. I also mentioned how if I didn't honor or respect myself, my body would no longer let me do it. Burnout is such a weird thing. Even looking at possible employment now, I realize how careful I will have to be to make sure I feel a sense of agency. There's something about me that really attracts people who want to micromanage me. Most the time they are trying to be helpful, and I listen patiently, but I want to curtly point out exactly why their concept of how something should be done is absolutely wrong for me. I'm not special, I just need agency, or I'll literally throw a fit eventually, and it's... really embarrassing.

She believed me. It seems like such a little thing but I've been trying to convince people that my brain worked differently for awhile. That my unmasking was not a temporary thing. That the girl who didn't have needs and limits was never a real person. Just me desperately trying to figure out how to be loved when everyone told me it was so hard to do. I’ve actually been told by people they wanted me to return to the previous version of myself. That quickly let me know where to put that person in my life. Far away.

I recently watched a K-drama called 'It's Okay To Not Be Okay,' where one of the characters is autistic, and I saw myself in one of his meltdowns. If I catch the signs of overstimulation early enough, I can keep things under control until I reach my room and dive under my gravity blanket. Outwardly, I may appear fine, but inside, it feels like chaos—like I'm running around lighting fires and screaming. Any unexpected bodily sensation or change I don't understand can trigger me. When I shut down and go numb, I have to isolate myself because facing my reality feels harsh and overwhelming. Despite these challenges, I've developed strong coping mechanisms and learned my limits, setting boundaries that even my children can understand. I’ve learned that when others can’t accept or hear my boundaries and limitations… there’s usually a reason beneficial to them for ignoring me. That’s a hard lesson to learn. I didn’t want to accept it, but I do now. I cherish the unique way my brain processes information and the intensity of my hyperfixations. I wouldn't change anything about myself, not even my difficult past. It's frustrating to hear people say I don't "look" autistic. I often find myself baffled by social interactions and the dishonesty I encounter. Though I struggle with socializing, I'm slowly relearning how to navigate it. Reading Katherine May's book 'The Electricity of Everything' was a revelation for me. Her narrative voice resonated deeply, and like her, I too surprised my doctor when I sought a diagnosis. Sharing experiences like hers helps me feel less alone. So, maybe, somewhere, my experience will help someone else too.

[chatty-goat]

Catching Up, Four Movie Special!

The Changeling (1980)

Tragically I know myself better than I used to. When my mental health is a certain sort of sickly, too much horror ends up making me feel terrible, and though it’s my favorite genre and the season is what it is, I’ve had to cut back. This was the Real One I allowed myself, it sounded familiar, apparently a classic. Later on Tubi recommended Burnt Offerings (1976) based on it, which I understand now but I greatly preferred the latter. I found out (while looking into it partway through, forgive me) it had some cult following, considered one of the most influential?? Canadian films?? Source?? I didn’t think it was terrible, but that felt like damning with faint praise. I do wonder if it’s the sort of thing where everything’s been influenced by it so it doesn’t hit like it used to for the modern viewer? Or maybe I just wasn’t in the headspace for it. Can’t really tell. Mildly enjoyed the protagonists, and the idea of the erm… I’m not sure what you’d call the senator here. Concept for the murder honestly wigs me out more now than it did during the watch, yeuch. My favorite scene took place outside of the haunted house, the main protagonist finally got Out There socially for the first time since his wife and daughter died, went horseback riding with the secondary protagonist, but when they stopped somewhere, something reminded him of his daughter, and he was about to cry, so out of sorts, very moving, except that the horse did not appear to be a very good actor and was chomping on the greenery voraciously just out of frame. If it was intentional then I think that is great use of tonally different elements to make the protagonist feel divorced from what’s happening around him, but it didn’t seem intentional, so I just had me a good laugh.

Victor Frankenstein (2015)

Tubi is my worst enemy but mostly my best friend. I’d never heard about this one, giving Igor the protagonist treatment seemed like just the kind of stupid I was in the mood for, and I’ve just loved every performance Daniel Radcliffe has given as an adult? He just decided to never be in anything normal again, and I love that for him. It scores pretty poorly it seems, and I get that, it’s not a Good Movie, but thoroughly enjoyable. Just hit me in most of my particularities regarding what makes “so bad it’s good”. Much more bisexual than I was expecting, made me cringe but mostly intentionally (not the bisexuality, the characters), somehow managed to throw in a love interest I liked?? The practical effects were lovely when we got them, the cg wasn’t too shabby, except in the editing, some of the editing especially in the circus was bad, as was some of the shit they made up for this movie, but for the most part those things were pretty funny. Almost completely skip over the grave robbing, give Frankenstein a sadboy reason for the obsession (my friend, when I talked about this, suggested they were trying to make him “a meowmeow”, yeah…). The worst part was this inspector character they threw in to shoehorn the affront to god thing, annoyed me every time that character came on screen because it meant I was about to listen to an atheist and a zealot be equally unbearable for a while. The guy who played Moriarty in that one Sherlock show was the inspector, shame he was so intensely unenjoyable whenever he wasn’t monologuing alone. All in all I really liked it though. I’m going to make my best friend watch it with me sometime soon, we’ll see if it’s Just Me or if the people of 2015 just weren’t ready to have a little fun.

Guilstein (2002)

It’s apparently just Frankenstein week for me. A friend and I were browsing anime movies and were intrigued by the promise of cg elements in this. It’s not a good movie. It’s not good cg. We watched it in pretty poor quality, looked like it had been ripped off a vhs, which honestly only helped it. The designs are like, godawful but in the way where I’m sure if I had watched it when it came out I would have thought some of them ruled. The tony hawk ass music was a highlight (I found an ost video on youtube, will be combing that soon), and honestly the main monster’s design grew on me by the end, but the real appeal has ended up being the process of digging up information about it. I often check out whether there was a fanfiction scene for anything I’m checking out, and I knew there was something about this when there was nothing to find. Silly monster stuff has a way of attracting attention, idk, something was up. From all I can tell, there was a Russian dub/sub?, but there were no English fansubs as late as 2020. The only people who saw this (there were not many) just like, either knew enough Japanese to warrant it or were the kind of people to watch any anime movie because It Was Anime, regardless of comprehension. Another era. Not that there was much to comprehend, but still. There are some very funny old reviews about it online. One called it a hipster movie and I’ll take it, there’s something special about getting to take a peek at something that just didn’t make the cut. And how lucky were we to find it so soon after someone finally made subs for it? It’s honestly not bad enough that I can easily pinpoint why, but such is how it goes. This was actually the thing that made me commit to the whole journalling thing, my friend said he was likely to forget about this one pretty soon, which I figured would be the same for me, but what a shame.

Other notes: one of the crew members looks like every human Equius ever, I will never be free. His girlfriend was cute (fucked up how shoehorned she was), and the monster design they made with her… Aside from the titty situation I like it a lot. I think there’s a lot to say about the designs of female monsters, how rare it is that they ever escape being feminine and sexy, but the way they do it in this one reminds me of a certain type of it that blends the human and the inhuman in a way I’m fond of. It’s just kinda fun. Reminds me of Andariel from Diablo 2 for some reason. Maybe it’s just Red Monster Lady idk. Something noted that it was “hastily” removed from potentially broadcasting, just so many funny little details.

A Wind Named Amnesia (1993)

This!!! This!!! Watched it after Guilstein with that same friend, we had spent the evening skipping through older things to avoid committing to a second movie (like an ancient toei Sinbad movie, gorgeous, a lovely musical that felt so of its time despite not being from the same place as the ones I’m familiar with, a chicken or the egg question I don’t feel like diving into right now), but I saw the poster and thought it looked fruity. Turns out that character was not an effeminate man but in fact a woman (the screen was far away and it was small…), but I was in luck anyway because I’m right and Wataru and Johnny were in love. What a treat! The only thing on this post that was both Actually Good and I Actually Loved. Imo it has the quality of a sci fi short story, something that just punches you with a premise and a thousand strange things you just have to get into so they can tell the story they really want to tell. And some of that stuff is Weird, but I was both in the mood for Weird and also it seemed like it was supposed to be making you uncomfortable? Or maybe that was just me projecting my sci fi brain onto it. Idk, some things just have the charisma to make it work. It was a joy, really tugged on the heartstrings and drew us into its little mysteries. My absolute favorite manga is YKK, and I have a soft spot for apocalyptic road trips and peering in on humanity. The love behind it, the aimlessness. Johnny’s contribution to why Wataru is the way he is hurt my heart in a unique way. Idk I’ve read a lot of shit like this in my day, but nothing that told the protagonist “Hey, there’s no Point anymore, I know you can’t be any kind of savior and don’t expect it of you, but I want you to live. You don’t have to do anything with that life. I just want you to be able to see what there is left to see, and if you happen to find out who did this, tell them the shit you’ve seen, and ask em to fix it.” Just. No expectations, and by god Wataru doesn’t pick up anything else. I really like that. The world truly cannot be his problem. A few misses to be sure, a racist design, the ending is divisive but I would have liked it were it not for the no-chemistry random sex, but overall this was endearing. Exactly up my alley. Another one I’m going to make my bestie watch.

About the short story comment: I was closer than I expected! It’s based on a novel by the guy who wrote Vampire Hunter D, which I’d heard of as a Big Deal but I’m not familiar with… But anyway, I read up about some differences between that movie and the book, and looked into the book itself… I have a little collection going of books I really had to hunt for. It’s just something I enjoy doing, and I keep independently ending up interested in things that are hard to find, and then when I talk about them it’s part of the story. Oh it took this long to find this whole series and I had to go to x and y place and I never would have even found out about it if I hadn’t picked the first one up in the dollar bin or seen a pretty small tumblr post or- ok so I’m a little book hipster I treasure the little things like that. But anyway this was apparently one of the less popular works of his, and also it’s a translated japanese novel from the 80s like, there’s not too many copies and they’re old but have a big name attached to them- what I’m saying is they’re too expensive for me, but I think I’m going to make it the target of my next hunt, keeping an eye out for them and seeing if it pops up locally and, christ, for less than 40 dollars. Or maybe my hunt will go on for so long that it’ll reach a point where I can justify that to myself. We’ll see. But it’s nice to have things to shoot for, and my last hunt was a great success so I’m eager to get on another trail.

Anyhow, those have been tumbling around in my head and I’m now free. Hopefully catching a few more z’s,

CG

[todoscript]

SEQUEL TO  “don’t forget it”

SYNOPSIS: One week after accidentally blowing you off on your date, Bakugou Katsuki seeks your forgiveness.

pairing: bakugou katsuki x fem!reader

genre: fluff, very little angst

word count: 5.4k+

warnings: none really accept maybe a character sustaining an injury

author’s note: hellooooo this is a very very very late part 2 of my don’t forget it drabble that many people asked for! i hope this lived up to your expectations and was worth the wait!

Since the events that led you to leave Bakugou’s room in a fit of bitterness after attempting to penetrate that thick head of his, he hadn’t been able to speak to you for a week.

It goes without saying he did his best to chase you down the hallway from his room and toward the elevator the moment he realized his faults. But at the stink eye you shot him through the minimizing slit of the elevator doors sliding into place, he knew he had no right to reconcile with you after pulling a stunt like that. Nor did he think you’d want to spare him any more words to begin with. It was clear you were done arguing with him.

“C’mon man, it’s probably best to let her cool down before you try to make up with her,” was the advice Kirishima offered when Bakugou returned to his room, disgruntled as he heavily fell back into his seat next to the desk. He did the bare minimum to acknowledge his friend’s words with a grunt before resuming tutoring the redhead, his method of teaching suddenly harsher than how it began thanks to his soured mood. He lapsed the day away by pounding Kirishima with problems upon problems against that hard noggin of his, both literally and figuratively.

At the very least, Kirishima earned himself a passing grade on their exam as a result of his hard work and their rigorous tutoring sessions. But what followed Bakugou’s and your relationship was still undetermined.

Days later and you were relentless in giving him the cold shoulder.

Bakugou was met with nothing but empty glances and blatant disinterest whenever he crossed your path. It felt like the wall you slotted between him grew another layer at each encounter, your defenses so impenetrable, it could give Kirishima’s quirk a run for its money. He couldn’t so much as utter a word in your direction without you effectively dodging every possible interaction in favor of joining another conversation nearby.

At first, Bakugou shrugged it off, calling your “childish attitude” unwarranted for something he thought was incredibly trivial. In his eyes, it was just an ordinary date at some run-of-the-mill restaurant he just happened to suggest to you because he took a liking to their spicy food. Not like it was some fancy dinner reservation serving caviar on dry toast beside a pretty, city night skyline. To him, it was nothing special.

However, as the week continued to roll by, it became clear to him how much he hurt you due to his selfishness. In a hangout with the Bakusquad, he learned that you apparently told Mina, along with the rest of the girls, everything during one of your girls’ nights. Which included the events prior to your heated argument in Bakugou’s dorm. And Mina, being just as peeved as you were at how Bakugou stood you up that day, had to let the blond know of the damage he’d done.

.

.

“I swear, Bakugou Katsuki, I know you can be an asshole sometimes—”

“Make that all the time,” Sero quietly adds in the middle of Mina’s rant while he lounges backward on Kaminari’s bed. If it wasn’t for his current dilemma, Bakugou would have elbowed him in the back of the head.

“—but this is crossing the line!” she finishes. Her arms are thrown exaggeratedly over her chest. The amber surrounded by the black scleras of her eyes points a beady look at the ash-blond crisscrossed on the floor between Kirishima and Kaminari.

“Poor girl sat there for hours waiting for you, only to find out she got blown off because you couldn’t even properly check your reminders!” She paces back and forth in the room, feet excessively stepping across the floor as she’s engulfed by the emotions she feels for her friend. “What’s worse? She comes back and finds out you’ve been doing your own thing with Kirishima the whole time!”

“Hey! It’s not like we were playing around! We were actually having a very serious study grind, thank you very much,” the redhead immediately clarifies. Though his explanation doesn’t alleviate Bakugou’s case in the slightest, who pounds his palms against the surface of the table they’ve gathered around.

“Look. I fucking get it, Ashido. I screwed up, okay?! Now what the fuck do you want me to do about it?!” he exclaims, anger overpowering his voice, but it does little to deter Mina.

“Fix it, obviously!” she quips back with equal fierceness, leaning in eye level with Bakugou.

“And how do you propose I do that, Raccoon Eyes? Hah?” Repositioning his elbow to rest on the table, he leans his cheek against his hand. “Y/n won’t even let me within five fucking feet in front of her and you still expect me ‘fix this’?”

Despite the situation weighing heavily on his shoulders, no immediate answer is bestowed upon him. That is, except the obnoxiously loud crinkle of a chip bag popping open next to Bakugou that cleaves into the scene like a record scratch. As if unable to read the mood in his own room, Kaminari fishes a chip to throw in his mouth, stirring the awkward silence into tension.

“Wow, Bakugou. I know you’re bad with girls and all, but you really messed up this time,” he remarks. His voice is slightly muffled as he munches his chips, continuing to wrinkle the bag for more. It incites a vein to swell on Bakugou’s forehead. He amasses all the willpower within him not to blast the bag of chips to ash, and the boy alongside it.

“If you dunce faces are just gonna sit here and throw salt in my wound then I’m outta here.”

“No, wait!” Kirishima catches Bakugou’s wrist before he fully lifts himself off the floor. “Come on, Bakugou, I’m sure we can think of something! We just need to put our heads together! Right, guys?” he assures. Finding it hard to deny his friend’s hardened conviction, Bakugou gives Kirishima the benefit of the doubt, albeit with slumped shoulders and a tentative raise of his brow as he slowly sits back down.

“Right! Everyone, let’s get some brainstorming done!” Mina yells encouragingly.

The atmosphere of Kaminari’s room is consumed by moderately thoughtful silence for the next ensuing minutes. A few hums pass, followed by an exchange of contemplative looks as four of the five rack their heads together to uncover a solution. The one in need of help only hunches in his seat, waiting with mild disinterest.

“Oh hey, don’t we have hero training with All Might tomorrow?” Sero is the first to comment, scooting to the edge of the blond’s bed.

“Yeah. So?”

“He said we were going to work on group exercises this time around. You know, teamwork and stuff,” he explains further.

At that, Mina snaps her fingers, the work of a brilliant idea flickering in her head. “Sero, that’s it! Tomorrow, during training, we’ll just form a group together with Y/n! After all, she’ll have to talk to Bakugou if you two are on the same team!” She claps her hands in front of her, her enthusiasm rippling through her body and shown energetically with each raise of her voice. “Then, while the rest of us ‘split up’ to cover more ground, that will be your chance to make everything better with Y/n! It’s genius!”

“You missed one fucking crucial detail, Pinky,” Bakugou gruffs. “That will only work if Y/n doesn’t join another group. The moment she sees I’m on yours, she’s not even going to hesitate making a u-turn.”

“Worry not~ I’ll just text all the girls except Y/n about the plan later and ask them to help sort everyone out!” She solves the problem with relative ease—quick as a click of her phone lighting up and finger sliding open to her messages.

“Uh, another thing though.” Kirishima raises his hand to spare his concern. “All Might says we’ll be splitting into groups of five at most, but there’s already five of us here.”

There’s a brief moment of deadpanning until Mina speaks casually. “Oh, that’s right. Kaminari. Take one for the team and make sure to join another group, ‘kay?” She settles without batting a lash.

Kaminari almost chokes on a mouthful of chips. “H-Huh?! What?! Why me?!!” he sputters.

“Because you’ve been eating chips this entire time and haven’t contributed to anything.”

“Hey, I offered the room, didn’t I?!” He tries justifying but is inevitably rejected by Mina’s wagging finger.

“Ah-ah, no complaints! Besides, it’s only one day of training. If we want this dilemma between Bakugou and Y/n fixed then we all have to play our part, got it?” Mina finalizes with a firm point of her finger nearly grazing the tip of the blond’s nose as he leans back to avoid it, eyebrows scrunched in discontent at the role he’s been reduced to.

“Alllllright!” Kirishima springs from his seat with outstretched arms and tightened fists. “Operation: Get Y/n to Forgive Explosion Boy is underway!”

“Dude, that’s a terrible name!” Sero laughs but rises from the bed to join the redhead’s cheer alongside Mina, the group already in high spirits.

Despite rolling his eyes at their swell of confidence, Bakugou does not object to the state of things. As crazy as it sounds, one could almost decipher the cusp of a grin pulling the seams of his lips as a possible sign he’s actually all for this extravagant little plan. Quite a first for Bakugou, but then again, there’s not much else he can do in this situation except rely on his pack of chumps.

Meanwhile, Kaminari grumbles something beneath the salty grit between his teeth.

“Alright, can you all get out of my room now?”

.

.

The scowl etched on your face carries a strong air of disdain that dampens the mood around your teammates considerably. Well, no one should be surprised. With Bakugou standing across from you, staring into the void of your expression, it’s to be expected that you wouldn’t be happy with this outcome.

No, “unhappy” doesn’t quite do your circumstance justice. You are beyond livid.

You feel your eyebrow twitch as you try quivering your lips to form a tinge of a smile. Unfortunately, all that quickly falls apart when you suddenly recall the disaster of last week, triggered by an accidental glance at Bakugou’s mug.

Trying to simmer down, you release a mental sigh amidst the turmoil boiling inside you.

Okay, maybe you’re over-exaggerating. Maybe you’re still just a bit too bitter for your own good and letting your emotions get to you. But in a class of twenty or some students, how did you end up in a group with the one person you were actively trying to avoid?

The moment All Might gave everyone the go-ahead to form their teams for today’s training exercise, you swiftly made a beeline toward two particular star students. Midoriya and Todoroki.

It was simple really. Your experiences throughout the school year told you Bakugou planned on staying away from his rivals when it came to teamwork, regardless of whether you’re there or not. He’s a competitive ass whose goal is to beat anyone he deems a threat in his climb to be the number one hero. It’s only logical you partner with people he adamantly dislikes to evade him.

Yet it seems fate has other plans for you today. By the time you found yourself pacing over to the two students you had in mind, they’d already gone and picked their own group members, forming teams before you could even ask.

Your nose wrinkles like you’ve taken a whiff of something rancid. Or, to be more specific, something fishy. Hooking an arm around Mina’s elbow, you drag the pink-haired girl off to a corner somewhere while tilting your head back at the three other boys.

“Ex. Cuse. Us.” Your words sound as stiff as cardboard. It comes out in practically a hiss when your eyes cross Bakugou. Once you’re positive you’re out of earshot, you whip your head at Mina.

“Mina, what the hell? When you dragged me over here to form a group with you you didn’t tell me he’d be there,” you groan. Childish and petty as you may sound, you just couldn’t fathom the idea of confronting the boy so soon.

Mina holds her hands out, ready to rationalize the whole ordeal. “C’mon Y/n, this is actually an advantage for us! With us four plus you on our team, we’re sure to knock the rest of the other guys out during training today! I mean we showed pretty good teamwork together at the sports festival, didn’t we?”

Steadying your gaze, you hold a finger below your chin as you slowly buy into the explanation. The reasoning is there. It’s hard to argue against a case like that, fully aware that being on the same team as explosion boy will easily snag good results for you and your party. ‘Cause as much of an arrogant jerk as he is, you have to admit Bakugou Katsuki knows his way around hero action like the back of his grenade gauntlets.

“Besides it’s not like you could avoid him for the entire school year. I mean, you two are in the same class. It was only a matter of time before you had to—”

“I know, Mina,” you interject, not wanting the rest of her sentence about the inevitable fall to your ear. “I just… Agh, you know what I mean!” You ruffle your hands through your hair in confliction, unsure how to piece your thoughts together.

Tilting your head over Mina’s shoulder, you sneak a glimpse at Bakugou, watching him as he’s cast to the side with the others. He’s fending himself from Kirishima and Sero’s combined jokes, that usual look on his face sending glares at the two and yelling something you could almost pick up on if you honed your ears a bit more. Surprisingly, when his eyes meet yours for a split second, he stands there looking nonchalant again. Both of you immediately avert your gazes.

Mina pats your shoulder, bringing you back to the conversation at hand. “I know, I know, but after this, I’m sure you can go back to ignoring his ass. After all, it’s just one training exercise, right?” she says. As her words deliver some relief to your ill-timed situation, you give in with a sigh.

Unbeknownst to you, turning your back to Mina and striding toward the rest of your teammates again, you miss the small glint in her yellow eyes, along with the subtle gestures she aims at the three boys, waving her pointed thumbs over your head secretively.

“So I take it you’re on the team with us, Y/n?” Sero asks when the two of you return. You nod in reply and the boy flashes his pearly whites in a wide grin that Kirishima mirrors. He nudges Bakugou at his sides which you subtly catch in the far corner of your eye.

You raise a brow suspiciously at their fidgeting, wondering why having you on their team warrants such enthusiasm, but you’re thankful for their energy at least. Someone has to lift the atmosphere for this not to be a complete drag and Bakugou surely isn’t going to be the mood maker of the group.

The blond scoffs. “Yeah, well, if you dumbasses are going to form a team with me, you’ll follow under my leadership, got it?”

The three readily agree. Though you roll your eyes, you don’t challenge his position, considering no one else is that much up to the task as he is. You’ll simply have to deal with the fact that you’re forced to tread through the day under his leadership. So with no objections, the five of you walk back to the class, gathering around the entrance of today’s battlefield.

Jumping into the activity, All Might goes about explaining today’s lesson to the four sets of teams—consisting of a group exercise to heighten teamwork. The name of the game? Capture the flag.

In short, each team will be split off into different sections of the labyrinth where their assigned flag is stationed. The objective is to not only protect your flag from being stolen but also try and steal an opposing team’s flag from their base and escort it safely to your home field. Nice and simple.

Not long after All Might’s explanation, the gate to the training grounds opens and you all scatter off into your teams, navigating through the twists of the maze to locate your flags. Once your group situated themselves onto your home base, you assemble in a huddle to devise a strategy before the game starts.

“So what’s the plan?” Kirishima asks, eyes darting around his teammates until they rest on Bakugou—the team leader. The ash-blond crosses his arms, a confident sneer plastered on his face as he’s already thought of his plan of action the moment All Might announced the mission.

“Easy. I’m going straight to the front-lines to swipe one of those dumbasses’ flags. You lot are gonna stay here and guard ours until I come back.” He delivers the strategy in a matter-of-fact tone that you quickly don’t take a liking to. Your fist curls in irritation.

“What kind of a plan is that?” you question audaciously, your voice louder than you intended. “So you’re just going to do all the work while we sit around and wait for you?”

Bakugou grits his teeth, leaning further into the huddle to direct his senseless logic. “Look, it’s the fastest and most surefire way to snag our victory without sacrificing anyone,” he says. Playing over his words again, he finds it surprising he even chooses to offer his reasoning. Because if it were anyone other than you he was arguing with, he’s certain he’d leave it at that.

Knowing the current tension between you was a result of his misjudgment, it feels only right for Bakugou to make an effort in communication. He ignores the antsy expressions belonging to the others who signal from behind you to follow along with their original plan.

You don’t seem to catch the hint, nor do you buy into his ridiculous strategy. “Oh, so you’re that confident you won’t get taken out by the other team then?” you quip. As a result, Bakugou’s brows tighten at your noncompliance.

“I know how to take care of myself. You of all people should realize by now that no other nerd in this whole damn class can outmatch me.”

“And what about an ambush? How do you know they simply won’t anticipate your strategy and see you coming?” You fire another counterargument and the boy purses his lips, beginning to find this quarrel spiraling into a headache rather than a step in the direction of reconciliation.

While Sero and Kirishima stand there, shifting their heads back and forth throughout the fiery exchange, Mina speedily reacts. The gears of that cunning mind of hers click into place again.

“You know what, Y/n’s right. Why don’t you two go together then?” she proposes boldly. Her suggestion catches you by complete surprise. You veer in her direction with an incredulous look blown in your eyes.

Before you can open your mouth to protest, the two boys standing beside her immediately back her up.

“Hm, Mina has a point. The chances of you falling into a trap wouldn’t be much if you two work together,” Sero remarks.

Kirishima follows, “Yeah, you guys can watch each other’s backs while going to collect the flag! It’s safer to go in a pair than by yourselves I’d say.”

The three seem adamant about the idea, sharing equally content expressions, and with all that said, you find it hard to dig yourself out of this situation. In a way, you practically volunteered yourself after questioning Bakugou’s plan and doubting his abilities. The group only feels it’s right you come along as his support since you clearly must be worried about his well-being.

Pushing your objections down your throat, you reluctantly agree to tag along with the blond. What you find exceptionally shocking is how Bakugou doesn’t oppose these new conditions. Given his hard-headed temperament, you thought he would’ve scoffed and turned his back at being paired without notice, but no such things were happening here.

...Odd.

“Tch, whatever. Let’s get going then,” is all he gives, starting in the direction into the urban area of the training course.

You trail behind him. “Coming, Boom-Boy…” you mutter the last bit but don’t suppress the urge to let your words be known. Bakugou turns his head and gives you a look akin to an uptight six-year-old you just offended at your local playground. You shrug in response, a corner of your lip pinched upward. He doesn’t pick a fight over the nickname, but his eyebrows remain fiercely slanted, and coupled with his heavy steps and the excessive swinging of his gauntlet-clad arms, it tells you of his emotional constipation plain as day.

.

.

The journey toward the other teams’ flags is cloaked in strained silence and the physical gap between you two does not encourage any of you to speak up. At this point, both of your levels of annoyance for each other have mellowed out. Now it just feels... awkward—strange. You don’t see his expression, nor does he see yours. It feels like you’re being left in the dark, having only the back of Bakugou’s head to stare at the entirety of the way, and though you supposedly have his back, Bakugou feels precarious in this state as he trudges along at the front, not daring to turn his head to cross your eyes.

The ambiance is reminiscent of the ancient Greek legend of Orpheus and Eurydice. Where Bakugou walks through the depths of the underworld, seeking you out in hopes you’d join his side once again. If he turns around now and spills his thoughts to you too soon, he fears that your forgiveness would be whisked away, thoroughly beyond his reach, and replaced with your promises of retribution.

That was the eloquent version of the situation anyway. To put it bluntly, Bakugou was just impatient as hell to say something to you. The silence suffocates him to the point where the words are nearly about to be squeezed out of his throat, but he bites his lip to snuff out the urges.

The more he keeps them in, the more fidgety he becomes, hands itchy and mouth trembling with grit between his teeth. The idea of not letting his voice be heard was something Bakugou detested. Mainly because it was already such a challenge to even keep his mouth shut, given his fiery attitude and lack of patience.

Man, what the hell am I hesitating for? he asks himself, that outspoken side of him spurring him on.

Ah, screw the uncertainty, he thinks. If he doesn’t say anything now, then he won’t get to say anything ever.

Bakugou stops in his tracks, turning his head. Here goes nothing,

“Hey, Y/n, I–”

“Katsuki–”

Words collide into each other, jumbled and incoherent, which take you two by surprise as you meet each other’s furrowed gazes. It’s quiet as you both piece your way through this, eyes trained like you haven’t seen each other in months when the reality is that a week of bitterness has somehow made you act like strangers. The bewildered look crossing his features is foreign to you; you’ve never quite seen Bakugou as taken aback as he is now.

“You first,” you grant before Bakugou could mix up your words again. Even being given permission, the blond still isn’t sure what to say, his thoughts lost on him the moment his voice clashed with yours. He takes a deep breath, calming his senses and steadying his mind for what he wants to convey.

“Look, Y/n, I don’t know how to put this as nicely as I can,” he begins, tone consistent yet wary, assessing your expression, “but I know I fucked up and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left you there all by yourself. I shouldn’t… have blown you off like that and forgotten about you.” He delivers this bluntly—honestly—as open as a boy of his nature can muster with arms spread out, willingly exposing him to his faults and your reprisals.

Looking at you, he finds your eyes are cast to the floor, assuming to be reflecting on his words carefully. After some deliberation, you come across the vermillion in his eyes.

“Frankly, I haven’t entirely forgiven you just yet. But I will say that despite how I’ve been acting, I’m not as mad at you as you think,” is what you give, and Bakugou would be lying to himself if he didn’t achieve relief at your statement. He mentally releases a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding throughout the exchange. However, you aren’t done yet.

“I just want you to understand what moments like those mean to me. It’s during that time where I can share my feelings and learn more about you—understand who you are,” you say. Bakugou latches onto every word. “And it goes both ways, you know. It’s hard to want to stay in a relationship with someone who doesn’t make an effort to make time for you.” It’s obvious you aim that comment at him as Bakugou’s eyes soften slightly hearing it. His calloused, glove-clad hands wrap into his palms. Man, he really was a jerk.

“Still… I know you’re making an effort to be sincere and that you’re genuinely sorry for what happened, especially considering how the others seem to have set this whole conversation up, right?” Bakugou winces over the Bakusquad’s ploy coming to light and makes a note not to follow along next time unless those dummies can scrape up a more elaborate plan.

Despite that, he presses on, “So, what does this mean?” A smile settles on the curve of your lips, sensing his impatience as his voice hastens you along.

“Well…” you begin, speech drawn out in anticipation as you step toward him to where Bakugou follows your movements. That is until he catches a few shadowy figures shifting around atop the small building behind you. Before you can open your mouth to continue, his instincts flare to life.

“Hey, look out!” he exclaims, already acting on his warnings by lunging forward to push you out of the way. Your breaths draw back into your lungs, your body thrust abruptly into the opposite direction. Landing on your butt, you wince at both the shock and the pain, but your whines desist when you witness Bakugou taking a force to the head as a result of coming to your aid.

“Katsuki!” you yell, immediately getting off the ground to rush to his side, but he can’t find it in himself to respond. Afflicted with a substantial blow to the crown of his head, his whole being throbs and his vision spins.

Fuck, is Y/n, okay? is the first thing on his mind, ignoring the liquid trickling down his forehead. His question is answered upon turning his head to meet your anxious expression—your eyes wide and lips quivering as they move to say words he can’t exactly make out beneath the pounding sensations consuming his mind. As he feels a set of arms wrap around him, he tries discerning his surroundings to form a reply, but can only capture bits and pieces.

“—tsuki! ...old… n!”

“...god—! I’m so dead!”

A sputter of words tangling together is the last he hears before his vision fades to black.

.

.

The next time Bakugou awakes, his eyes slowly sever open to come face-to-face with a blurry white ceiling. The lights assault his vision as his senses take time to adjust, unraveling the environment to realize he’s laying on a bed—a hospital bed to be precise.

He attempts lifting himself but is met with retaliation in the form of his pulsating head which he immediately flinches at. His hand goes to rub his scalp to soothe the ache and he finds bandages wrapped tightly around him. “What the hell happened?” The last he remembers is traversing the urban area with you for the capture the flag mission before finally confronting the subject that had been plaguing your minds for a week now. After that, he caught sight of some object descending toward you and before he had even realized it, his feet had moved on their own. Next thing he knows, he’s waking up in the nurse’s office with a headache from hell.

Wait, what about you? Were you okay? Surely, he had to have pushed you out of the way in time, right?

His head moves quicker than it should’ve, revealing the other hospital bed in the room to be unoccupied, vacant. He sighs and his relief is further bolstered by the door to the nurse’s room opening to unveil you unharmed with only your heavy look of concern troubling him.

“Katsuki, oh thank god, you’re okay!” you say, quickly pacing over to his side with a glass of water in hand. You leave it at his bedside, sitting before him. Gauging your appearance up and down, Bakugou tries making out even the smallest details.

“You aren’t hurt?”

You’re appalled he would ask this despite clearly being the one patched up in a hospital bed right now, and likely sporting some serious head trauma.

“Of course I am, you’re the one that lunged forward to protect me,” you tell him. Bakugou looks down at his lap, figuring that was what happened, but hearing it from you comforted him more than he thought. However, his comfort is wretched from him by the intense pressure persisting in his skull. Seeing him in pain, you urge him to lay down and rest.

“How the hell did I end up here anyway?”

You fidget with your fingers, hesitating on answering. At that, the blond lifts a brow, suspicious.

“Mineta… accidentally dropped a rock on your head.”

“...You gotta be joking, right?”

Bakugou leers hard, finding the reason he was out of commission to be a damn pebble hitting his head a detriment to his pride. And because of Mineta of all fucking people. Still, if he hadn’t acted as quickly as he did, you would’ve been the one to meet his fate instead, and he weighed this outcome to better than the former.

Then you explain how the teachers had temporarily intervened to bring his unconscious body to the nurse’s, where the old lady went about tending to his injury. Said she did her job and all he needed was to rest and let her quirk take fuller effect within that time.

“So did we win the game?” He switches the topic to today’s mission of capture the flag that was cut short on his end.

You shake your head, but at least grant him the benefit of knowing Mineta’s team ended up placing last. At that, his eyelids shut and he crosses his arms behind his bandaged head. “Yeah, well, it wasn’t my intention to win anyway.”

You give him a look. “...Liar.”

Bakugou cracks an eye open at you. “Hah? What do you mean I’m a fucking liar?”

“I know you, Katsuki. I dated you, after all. And the Katsuki that I dated is an arrogant, competitive jerk who thinks of being the best above all else.” Bakugou scrunches his nose, wondering what you’re implying through your... overly frank descriptions. “Still… he’s sweet and caring at times… and reliable when he needs to be,” you continue, tone softening that draws Bakugou in, “And the kind of guy I want to give a second chance to.”

Absorbing your words, Bakugou blinks. “S-Seriously?” He doesn’t mean to stutter, but the offer catches him off-guard. He replays what you just said. That’s what he heard, right? A second chance?

You giggle at how uncharacteristically astonished he sounds. “Yes, seriously.”

“Does that mean you forgive me for what happened last week?”

You hum between pursed lips in playful contemplation. “Well, maybe you can redeem yourself by going on another date with me then?”

Hearing your proposal, a wide grin arcs his lips, edging into a smirk.

“That’s it? Well, I can definitely fucking do that,” he states, confidence rejuvenating his body at the new, hopeful chance before him.

“Oh, just one more thing though,” you suddenly add.

“What?”

“We are not going to that Chinese Restaurant again.”

[ghostvoi]

What goes though your head when writing a chapter of Lost Parallax?

A lot of things, to be honest.

I pay a lot of attention to the language characters say and think, specific word choices, turns of phrases, and how they deliver their lines. There's a few times in the fic where I have Oscar, despite how well-read and educated he seems to be, use words in speech and thought that are higher vocabulary I do not think that he would use. There's a few times he messes up names in his head too, and sometimes he catches it and sometimes he doesn't. Even Oscar's own perception on how he uses language is, at times, a little... skewed.

I don't think the above is a very important detail, but it is there and it makes it into the narrative. ...Or maybe it is important? :3c

In addition to character language details, I pay special attention to not using colloquialisms or expressions etc that reference things from our world. There's a number of times I've wanted to use 'cross/ing the Rubicon,' but that's a phrase that alludes to Julius Caesar's crossing the Rubicon river as a precipice of civil war, and so, has zero context or reason to exist in the RWBY universe.

In a similar vein, I try not to use generic phrases. Generic phrases aren't bad and they don't inherently indicate bad writing, I just don't find them altogether interesting to read. Sometimes though, a generic phrase works a million times better than specially crafted prose. It really depends on the effect you're going for.

In yet another similar vein, I think the best improvement to my writing was actually when I adopted a tumblr post to heart that actually had very little to do about fiction writing and instead was about being very specific and inclusive with your language. Such as 'problematic' is a terrible descriptor when you can just call something as vitriolic, or hateful, or purposefully obtuse. 'Problematic' is a very very poor descriptor for what something actually is. ...There's obviously a lot more to that post than what I'm very poorly describing here, but the point was to be specific in your language. Is a 'crazy' situation better described as 'hectic?' Or 'catastrophic?' or 'a lil' weird?' (And like, for writing fiction in particular, I take this to the degree of 'character x feels sad.' But what kind of sad specifically? Melancholic? Sorrowful? Dismal? Dispirited? Is it a smoking-and-crying day? Specificity in language, I think, is a big part of how I write and what I think people who read my work respond to.)

I'm careful about what a given character should know or how they should act at a certain time. Since Lost Parallax is a time travel fic, obviously someone like past Weiss can't act like vol 7 Weiss, etc etc. That's probably the most difficult thing to balance, tbh. With the fic taking place in "present" time and with the number of flashbacks of the "past" reflecting on Oscar's experiences with other characters, juggling the characterizations of different timelines is personally pretty challenging.

I think about how I really should read more fanfiction for someone who's writing fanfiction.

I also think a lot about characters' emotions and interpretations, so I spend a lot of time exploring their head spaces. I imagine for people who hate reading introspection then my fic is probably very definitely not for them.

I think, idly, about how I still haven't given Alexander a physical description. I think, with a special warmth in my heart, about how well-received my OCs have been. I'm like a million times sure that's because Rook says "fer" instead of "for" and all the other dialectic quirks I've given so many of them. I say this every time I talk about my OCs, but I never expected to 1.) need to use OCs and 2.) that people would like them as much as they do once I started adding them in. I went into the fic expecting to use zero OCs and yet here we are...

...I recognize belatedly, as in just now as I write this sentence, I should probably tag my fic with the OC tag...

...But then again, from what I've read on reddit, apparently new people would probably avoid it if I did so...? Though I guess the OCs aren't really the primary part of the fic, they're just around to narratively support Oscar & cast and explore themes, so maybe it's okay if I don't.

I think about how there's two things my readers really want to happen in the coming arc and how those two very specific things do not, in fact, happen.

I sometimes think to myself, that really, my fic is just me asking myself, "How do I write an introspective drabble about every RWBY scene and pretend it's a longform fic?"

I sometimes find myself wondering about the people who comment on my fic "I don't usually read time travel/rewrites/something else here/something else there" and go on to tell me how great my fic is by bashing someone else's. Never, you know, with names, but it still makes me a little sad. Don't praise my stuff while putting down someone else, I don't like it, it doesn't make me feel good.

...I think about that one flame I received on Christmas Eve in my second year of high school a million years ago and how it shaped my perception of criticism online, which is: people are very funny and also probably lonely.

I sometimes debate what I want to happen, with what I think is more likely to happen, or also what's more funny if that happened instead. ...That's how the Ozdad Oscarson misunderstanding came about. Mostly because I just thought it was funnier than something else I was considering instead.

Ah, I try to have appropriate moments of emotional change. Uhh, like, Oscar starts out Really Really Anxious in the beginning chapters of Lost Parallax and there is an as-of-yet-unrevealed Reason for part of that, but if he stayed that way through the whole fic, it would be pretty unpleasant to read. So chapter-to-chapter, I try to keep track of how often a character feels a certain way, and from scene-to-scene. So Oscar goes from Anxious to Determined to ????/????, but I also specifically have places where he slips back, because people rarely... mmmn, how do I say this... improvement of a person doesn't always mean that person is always doing their best in every single moment. Those moments have to be conscious, and it is very easy to slip back into old patterns. That doesn't mean we're not improving, it just means we need to be more aware. And I think that applies to characterization too. Improvement of yourself, or developing changes in a character, isn't always a matter of building a house a brick at a time. It can be messy and disorganized and hard to see, but that doesn't mean it's not there.

I try to have that sort of feeling in the fic, you know?

...I think about my own character arc where I battle with using the right damn tenses. It's daunting rereading some chapters and seeing so so so many tense mistakes. I want to fix them but... hoo boy...

Hmmm... well this was a mess of a post, huh. I guess that's just some stuff I think about when I write this fic. There should be more writing specific stuff in this, but, welp, I got introspective, I guess.

[anonil88]

Reposting this because, I was right.

This was written the summer before season 2 aired.

Gonna talk about my lowering expectations and my wariness or worries for Season 2 of Euphoria.

These are just my personal opinions and speculations. This is long oops, buckle in.

This season is about to be so dark and a bit more gritty, less pretty effects but still great visuals and edits. I look forward to that I just hope it doesn't turn off too many fans. I saw a lot of people did not enjoy the specials for their lack of glitter and their blunt honesty. The dialogue is needed especially because not only Rules but all of these teens have terrible communication skills. The specials were honestly amazing and a great step into this more realistic aspects of a very complicated love story. I hope we can continue this line of realism and more perspectives or at least Rue talking about other characters perspectives. I would actually love to see Leslie, her mom, and things from her side of the story.

We all know it will be dark but my fear is that its going to be a trauma dump with poor writing, and no room for breathe. I know Sam has about like 5 different projects going on so I hope he took or takes his time with this script. But, after Malcom and Marie I'm a bit worried because he is going to have to go into uncharted new territory. Especially with these newer characters, I know HBO/A24 euphoria casting is looking for a stripper or two which has me a bit shook. I wonder how far they are going to push this show in the limits of wild but realistic teenage years. Personally even at 25 have never been to a strip club but I do know people who started stripping/dancing at 18. Either during our senior year of highschool or their freshman year of college. Sam being a cis white man is going to have to do his research and talk to people in order to not write a character like that in a damaging light. Which I hope doesn't happen because I'm pro adult dancer with transparency about that industry and others like it. Someone does need to spell out realistic consequences of joining in those industries at a young adult age, but it needs to be done correctly. I don't know if Sam will be the right person for that but only time will tell.

I have the same worries with the introduction of more poc cast and specifically black characters. Again time will tell and I cannot judge something entirely that I have not read or seen.

In general with Sam's writing i hope that any input that the cast has with their characters and the storylines is taken into consideration. I know this was done with the bridge episodes and season 1 but, sometimes studios can loom over talent when something is so successful. With all the awards, acclaim, and criticism I hope that peoples voices are still being heard and listened to. It would be a disservice to HBO to force expectations that could hurt the shows quality. *glares in last season of game of thrones*

While I'd love for this season to focus on anyone other than Jason Bateman Jr. the show is a drama and eventually Nathan will have to surface at some point. Rmfe.

I think there definitely need to be something where the on hand psychology liaison works out a plan for dismantling the Nate is just a fixer upper thing going on. I'm usually fine and let people ship what they ship but seeing so many abuse apologist sends off alarms in my mind. I realize it has partially to do with Jacob being attractive, which is also a great point the show is making pretty people can be bad too. But, it makes sense why this show is not geared for kids/young teens because the point just flew over theirs and even a lot of adults heads. I can only think that he will not be written as a complete villain because truth be told he is not entirely evil. He is a scared little boy in a grown man's body who needs therapy and real weighted consequences. He might not get either of those things and we just see him go off into the world, that is scary but real.

I'm aware that all of these characters could and likely will make turns for the worst. All teenagers and adults make mistakes, sometimes damaging ones. But, since some of these characters are trying to get into college I think that needs to be taken into account with their stories. Unless Nate doesn't plan on going to college it is unrealistic for him to be acting a whole fool the entire season. So I hope we don't get a over the top Joker character because senior year you kind of don't have time to fuck your senior year up unless you actively try to. At least in my experience. Also for the love of Jesus I don't want him and Jules to be anything. Even if he has feelings I need it to be plainly written out that its twisted and one sided because he is emotionally manipulating both her and Maddy.

Our time with certain characters is either running out this upcoming season or will fade. I know McKay might not come back or will be a background character. I actually think that is smart so the story isn't bogged down with irrelevant characters but, i hope the storyline and Rue or Nate's story doesn't suffer because of this. With the introduction of new characters the focus could go anywhere with this new season.

Maddy has the tape and her limbo of a breakup with Nate to worry about. If she uses it against Jules in favor of Nate, imma have to hope karma bites her in the ass.

Kat has her stalker and I'm terrified where they will go with her storylinr. I hope the writer does show the more negative aspects of camming, as well as, the effects it can/would have on a minor doing that. Because in the moment it is fun....and then you find yourself conscious of the decision you've made and with whom. The very serious legal ramifications that exist as well should you get caught. But, i really don't want them to girlboss Kat for being an underage person making money that way without any scope of what she's getting into. That would be so so harmful. But, I don't want her story to become one giant p.s.a for the dangers of XYZ work.

I believe in a Jules Vaughn supremacy and I want to protect her from that evil boy and his father. Am so so looking forward to new Jules' makeup and fashion looks that reflect the characters rejection of doing things for male validation . I do love her even though her and Rue's communication issues drive me up a wall. She should have just been like Rue, I like you a lot so can we sit down and talk about this but she didn't and now they are both out there crying into a pillow asking why doesn't she like me. I do get that they are 16/17 and I too at 17 most definitely wasn't equipped to communicate that well either. Hunter is doing a phenomenal job and I see a long career in her future.

Oh Rue, I think he is handling Rue's story well, but as always they can handle certain things differently. I.E even though I didn't see it as romantization I know some people did see the scene with her yelling at Fez and her OD as being too cheery. Rue in the special episode makes you angry and I actually would love more of that. I want to be upset at this character that I love and relate to so much, because a lot of her choices are frustating. Even the ones she makes that aren't revolving around her addiction which is honestly the only thing her life really revolves around. I wonder what else Rue enjoys or will find joy in besides drugs, Jules, and hanging out with her mom. She desperately needs to find a better outlet and hoping we get to join her on the journey to finding that..

Since we see everyone's perspective from her eyes it will be nice to see how her lack of sobriety affects those around her. Especially the baddest most down friends someone could have, Lexi and Fezco.

Lexi and Fez's episodes are gonna be so good, but God i know they are going to be vastly different because of the lives they lead. Fez' will get very sad or upsetting and Lexi' is going to bleed out of Cassie and Rue's storylines. These two are the closest to Rue who dealt with her addiction before rehab and before we met Rue. If Rue is this bad when she has no reason to keep living, imagine how she was directly after her dad passed away. Which because she is unreliable she never talks about and we only see glimpses of when she isn't narrating. So it will be really interesting to get a deep dive for both of these characters.

Fezco is the only man I really care about in this show. Um, Ethan is okay but I don't think he needs an episode. I'd rather get an episode on Fez and his little brother/cousin.

I would also like no love more of detective Lexi because that was too fun. Also Lexi is every person who has a bestfriend who gets into a relationship and they gush about that person in front of you for a little too long.

I'm kind of worried for Cassie honestly because she has come out of the wanting to date to feel loved phase, but will she focus on herself? Will she focus on school or skating? Will we even get to see more of her character or will she fade into the background a bit more and her story goes stale? I don't know i just hope that if there are any scenes like last season that its done in a "tasteful" way. She shouldn't be the show or productions golden ticket or free pass to be used as an object or trophy. McKay already did that and she deserves better. After my many rewatches of season 1 I'm still a bit unsettled by some of those scenes with her. I get she's supposed to be looked at from that lens of owning her sexuality while dealing with the male gaze, but at times its like jeez yall are really had to go there. Maybe its because i don't or try not to look at women with misogyny as a backlight, BOO DANIEL BOOO. The carousel scene is probably one of the most uncomfortable 5 minutes I've ever experienced watching TV. I just hope that behind the scenes and in table reading discussions are being had with Sydney' and any other actors to respect their comfort levels.

It is funny that out of the HBO shows with nudity that this is the one with the least femme presenting nakedness. I'm not weirded out by nudity but even for me seeing all them elephant trunks had me like O.O. It is nice to see that all bodies are being normalized and specifically that its not just "lets sexualize femme bodies" for views. Instead it subverts the norm while also reinforcing that bodies can be shown without any other intent than that bodies exist in many forms. A couple newer HBO and HBO max original shows are also following in Euphoria's lead with this, but there are still some HBO shows that I'm like so "you can show topless women back to back but the men are covered up and "modest". "

Ugh I hope the Game of Thrones spinoff has learned from its past, but that's me trying to be nice instead of saying I'm not interested after that finale season.

After this season we likely only have one more season, 3 Season model has taken over and honestly it makes sense to only go to 4 seasons max with this show. S1 and 2 for junior year, S3/maybe 4 for senior year. A season for each semester. Also if im remembering correctly Sam said he got clean after highschool or around that senior year to college years. And since Rue in a lot of ways is based off of him that timing makes sense. So I hope for a season 2 that is more reflective of the bridge episodes that gets us to season 3. And, I hope for this upcoming season even with the criticism that will come that its handled and executed beautifully. Glitter, messiness, and realistic sadness in all.

That's all I've got to say for now.

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

How do you think the Cullen's would have turned out if they lived their natural human lives and not forever frozen at an age / the state they were in? For example I think Carlisle would always be kind and tame but perhaps not as idealistic. Rose might grow bitter of the world since even if Royce didn't assault her I can't imagine he would be the loving husband she wanted. Edward, who watched his parents die and was dying himself, might not be as moody and miserable. Who knows about Jasper and Alice and Esme. Emmett would probably stay the same. Bella, if she never met the supernatural, probably would just be a quiet old soul but otherwise not mal adjusted. I can't even guess about Renesmee haha since she has no personality next to being ~inhumanly special.

I mean, sadly, we know the answer: they wouldn't be around very long and would have died miserably. There's no such thing as a natural human life, well, I suppose you can die of old age, but the fate of the Cullens didn't have that in store.

But let's get into it just the same.

Alice

Had James not come across Alice, she likely still would have been turned at some point by her maker, who seems to have been very fond of her. It was just a matter of time. The difference being that, instead of being a newborn completely on her own, her maker would have been there. This is an Alice very unlikely to see Jasper or the Cullens in her future, though who knows, Carlisle and her maker might very well cross paths someday due to the similarity of their work.

But I doubt Alice would ever end up on the diet.

For Alice to remain human, she can never have been sent to that asylum. In which case we have two options a) she's not sent to an asylum b) she's sent to a different asylum.

In the first case, Alice is more than likely murdered by her father. This is what got her sent off in the first place: she was running around town claiming that her father had murdered her mother and now planned to murder her. To shut the hysterical woman up, her father sent her to an insane asylum. Which effectively got her out of his life just as he wished.

If that didn't occur to him, then yes, Alice likely falls gravely ill or has some unfortunate accident that she cannot prevent.

Otherwise, Alice is sent to some other insane asylum, likely still loses all her memories due to electroshock therapy, and probably dies very young due to poor health conditions. The life she does live is utterly miserable.

Bella

Bella dies in a parking lot, she's hit by a truck out of control. Otherwise, Bella dies in Port Angeles, she's raped and her body abandoned in a dumpster. Otherwise, Bella is eaten by a vampire.

And if Bella miraculously survives all of that, I imagine her struggle with depression continues throughout high school and into college. In college, she may meet someone who catches her interest, in which case she becomes completely codependent on them for a sense of validation (as she did Edward and Jacob in canon).

The relationship is a toxic mess, ends in a very messy breakup, and Bella goes through her New Moon phase a bit later. She might finally get therapy and survive this very dangerous phase in her life, at which point, she finally starts the slow recovery from depression.

I imagine Bella will be struggling with depression though for all of her life and, if left untreated, it might very well kill her.

Carlisle

Had Carlisle not been turned this means the vampire likely drained him. Carlisle dies at the head of the mob, this sentences the other Cullens to death as well as now no one will turn them.

Let's say Carlisle wasn't as fast that day. He had a leg cramp, or something. Not being well in front of the others, he's not hit by the vampire first. This increases his chances of death, as the vampire seems to have killed the rest he took a bite of, but he could survive.

Carlisle lives with the haunting guilt that the one time he tracks down a true demon he brought death to his parish. Several died due to his actions, the demon got away, and now there's no sign of it. Carlisle completely and utterly failed.

This is probably the final straw for Carlisle. Demons exist, but they are beyond his capacity to hunt, this is a job for God and not mere mortal men. He stops the demon hunts, stops the witch hunts, and focuses himself strictly on helping the community and preaching.

He lives knowing his father would have continued to be sorely disappointed in everything he does.

Carlisle likely marries within a few years, now that his father is dead and he's the established head of the parish. He may or may not like his wife all that much, but he has a responsibility, and having a wife and children is one of those. I imagine that they either are somewhat fond of each other or quietly tolerate one another.

If Carlisle has a son, the son is trained as a priest, sent to seminary as he was, and set to inherit the parish. If he has only daughters, then it will be her husband who will inherit the parish.

When Carlisle dies he is likely remembered very fondly by the parish for the good he did for the community. No one talks about the demon hunting disaster. He's buried next to his father.

Edward

Edward dies of the Spanish Influenza in 1918.

Had he never caught it, and thus never come across Carlisle, I imagine he lives a somewhat ordinary life. He goes to university somewhere very well established, perhaps even one of the Ivy League schools, I can see him training to become a lawyer. He either joins his father's law firm or, if his father's not a lawyer, some law firm in Chicago where he does quite well for himself.

He probably courts then marries some affluent, well to do, woman who hits all the checkmarks he expects from society. They probably get on quite well.

The market then crashes in 1929, when Edward's only 29 years old, and Edward gets to live through the depression. Edward may be lucky enough to retain his wealthy, however, he very well could not have been. Edward is now unemployed, destitute, and miserable just like the rest of the country.

I imagine this is very hard on him, he becomes very bitter and resentful, and as he desperately tires to find work it just gets worse. Edward becomes mired in cynicism.

Then the war hits, Edward is now 41, and he's too old to enlist in the army. He feels a sense of nostalgic bitterness that, once again, he can't go fight the good fight and has to cheer from the sidelines. Nonetheless, the economy starts to recover thanks to the war, Edward recovers with it and things get better.

Edward lives his ordinary human life and, perhaps, lives to sometime in the 1990's.

Emmett

Emmett is eaten by bears.

Had he not happened to be in the mountains that day then, likely, some other unfortunate accident would have befallen him. He's a mountain man, that's a dangerous life.

He gets eaten by bears, eaten by mountain lions, injured somehow and then dies, hit by a tree that he cut down, there are so many possibilities.

If he does live to an older age then he becomes the gruff mountain man stereotype that we all know. I imagine he remains a very friendly, cheerful, man, probably marries some local girl and has a very large family.

Esme

Esme kills herself. With the death of her child, that was the path she chose, and had she not been turned she would have been successful.

However, had her child lived, I imagine her life would have continued on the path it was on. She would have been a single mother, working as a teacher, and raising her child.

They would have been poor, but Esme seemed determined to make this work, and was doing an excellent job at it.

Perhaps, in time, she would meet the right man and remarry. However, I think that would take a lot of time as the whole issue was that she was hung up on the ideal of Dr. Carlisle Cullen who she met when she was sixteen and never saw again.

Regardless, she's far more of a real person grounded in reality than Esme the vampire ever was.

Jasper

Had Jasper not come across Maria, he likely would have died in the war. Many, many, people died in the civil war, and Jasper would be far from alone in that.

If not, he would have returned to the ravaged south, and likely found himself facing unemployment and very difficult times for wherever he came from.

Jasper would likely pull through, we know he has lived through hell in canon and pulled through there, though changed for life by the horrors of the civil war that will now never quite leave him.

Renesmee

Renesmee is never born. Her father is a demon a hundred years older than her mother. There is no chance that Bella becomes pregnant with Edward's human child, let alone his vampire child.

If Bella does become pregnant with a vampire child, she's likely been raped by Joham. Bella dies in confusion and agony, Renesmee is born into this world utterly alone, is picked up by Serena, and becomes yet another sister of Nahuel's.

Renesmee lives the miserable life that all of Nahuel's siblings do.

Rosalie

Rosalie is gang raped to death by Royce and his friends and dies in agony in an alley. Had she not come across Royce that night then likely, after they marry, he at some point rapes her to death and murders her.

The likelihood of Rosalie, with her parent's ambitions and her looks, of not marrying Royce is very small.

Even then, Royce is in town in general, that means all she needed was one bad night. Which, in canon, she had.

However, let's say she lives and Royce wasn't interested in her hand, she marries option number two. As you note, her marriage still likely isn't fulfilling. Rosalie is there to be beautiful and poised, to have tea with the ladies in society, and watch as a governess raises her children.

This is the world she lives in, and she accepts that, but over time she becomes increasingly bitter and resentful of this thing we call life.

TL;DR Remember, there's no escape from the pit of despair we call Twilight

[bicycleboyblog]

Webcomic Recc Week 3

☆.:*[ Click here to read THE AWLERS on Comicfury! ]*:.☆

"I love the long history of myths we've told through animals since time immemorial. I wanted to weave them together with some of my own."

- Syn-Cypher

Hiatus: Week 3! This week’s webcomic is The Awlers by Syn-Cypher, a mythological furry tale about a group of rabbits on a mysterious, magical quest into the woodlands.

The story throws you right in to the rabbits’ pilgrimage through the cursed forest. It is like a fever dream. Poor Bawler is bit by a spider and, surprisingly, this causes a lot of trouble for the group right off. One would expect such a tale to shrug off seemingly minor wounds and get on with the adventure, but what follows is a desperate struggle to make sure Bawler doesn’t succumb to poisoning. From there, it gets weird. Delightfully weird.

Syn is a dear friend of mine and his work is so special. He weaves a sense of love, mystery, fascination, and rainbowy magic into every panel of his work, which often strays off the beaten path with animations and glowing effects. Sometimes the comic feels like walking into a night club, it just carries you with the beat and you get lost in it. His colors are bold, shimmering and wild–utterly unlike anything I have ever seen, like a kaleidoscope on the page. The layouts are delightedly avante-garde. Swirling lines and overlapping panels sweep you along with a rhythm that routinely smooths, then churns itself jagged.

Syn also has a knack for designing old-school manuscripts. Hares canted like one would see in a medieval painting, hugged by musical verses that tell legends and riddles. Borders adorned with symbols and celtic knots. Somehow, the gold-foiling on some of the manuscripts looks like it’s reflecting at you even through the screen!

And the foliage--humming in and out of view--oh, it is so alive. Syn makes sure to add in every single goddamn leaf! As someone who used to do the same thing, it’s a lot of work. :V Fantastical though his world may be, the exquisite detail transports you there and swallows you whole. If anything, you gotta check out Syn's illustration work. The guy really is something else.

Fans of animal fantasy tales Redwall, Mouse Guard, and Silverwing, and lovers of mythical fables in general will adore the colorful, dreamlike world and epic legends of The Awlers.

Relevant Links:

The Awlers Webcomic Site (The link goes to the first page of The Awlers, but both The Awlers and Munchkin & the Goon share the same site.)

The Awlers Tapas Mirror Site

The Munchkin and the Goon Webcomic Site

Syn-Cypher @ Patreon

Syn-Cypher @ Twitter

Syn-Cypher @ Youtube

Syn-Cypher @ DeviantART

[yeojaa]

stay gold.

pairing.  jjk x f!reader.  rating.  explicit.  tags.  blond!jk being a good boy?  idk.  that’s literally it.  wc. 3k.  beta reader.  @hobi-gif​, ofc.  author note.  this was meant to be pwp but i cannot shut up so here is this mess that is neither pwp nor something with a legit plotline. 🤠 blame blondie.

Having a content creator boyfriend is fun.  Usually.

You get to go on cool trips, he gives you all of the random shit his sponsors send him, and you get to preen like a cat that ate the canary when his DMs blow up with hundreds of messages.  

Sure, there are the downsides.  All his stupid pranks - the ones that piss you off when you’re trying to do your makeup, the ones that have him dunking ice cubes on you while you’re in the middle of a shower - and his perpetual recording, camera glued to his hand and if not that, then his phone.  There are the rude comments - the oh, that’s his girlfriend? He could do better was a common one - and the long hours he spends editing, holed away in his office;  the beyond inappropriate packages he gets in the mail, thongs and other things that he immediately tosses away with a reassuring tilt of his pretty head.

You don’t mind it though.  He enjoys it, thrives on it, and you’re there to support him.

But you’d never expected this.

This Adonis standing in the doorway, freshly styled strands pushed back from his forehead, glimmering gold falling across his eyes.  He looks, for lack of a better word, unreal.

(You’re not often speechless.  Can’t be, when you’re dating someone like Jeon Jungkook and everything he does either makes you laugh or infuriates you.  Boring isn’t a part of his vocabulary and you’ve learnt to keep up with his antics over the years.)

(Still, this comes close, stealing all the air from your lungs.)

“Hey, baby.”  It’s his usual greeting, offered without hesitation as he crosses the threshold and tosses his keys into the catch-all by the door.  Kicks off his chunky sneakers and peels his sweater over his head, effectively tousling the tawny threads.

He’s so handsome it’s outright disgusting, leaving you gaping up at him from your post on the couch.  Gives you very little to work with as he shimmies down the hall, grabs an apple off the kitchen island, and then not-so-gracefully plops himself down beside you.  

You still haven’t found your words by the time he takes two gigantic bites, flesh crunching between his teeth, big doe eyes sparkling like he’s stepped right out of a Disney film.

“D’you like it?”  

Did you?  Well, obviously.

You’ve never imagined Jungkook blond.  He’d gone through a phase in college, colours of the rainbow rotating through the ends of his hair.  Brown, red, orange, blue.  You’d loved each hue but this was something else entirely.  (Different even from the two months he’d spent as full-on ginger, committing far too hard to his Haikyuu!! Halloween costume.)

This version of him is steeped in some twisted fantasy, a dream crafted by years of bedtime stories and happily ever afters.  It screams Prince Charming and has you reaching for him before you know what you’re doing, threading fingers through the surprisingly soft silk that curls over his ears and looks so lovely next to the silver of his piercings.  

You mean to be gentle, to comb delicately through flax but fuck.  He looks so good you want to devour him.  (You can only imagine your face - a lovesick puppy brought home from the pound.)

There’s still apple in his mouth, juice tracking down his chin because you’re really making it quite hard for him to chew when you’ve got him like this, two hands on either side of his face, holding him in place.  Inspecting him like a piece of meat as he peers at you, deceptively innocent and amused.  “That’s a yes?”  

An answer comes in the form of a kiss, of limbs rearranging and settling directly into his lap.  Knees wide, chest to chest, you can’t even be bothered by the sickly sticky feel of his skin, the way his hands are too cold to be creeping up beneath the hem of your - his - shirt.

(Where had he put the apple?  You know it’s not finished, two bites in and left to roll all over the rug.  You’ll give him shit for that later, when you’re not so distracted.)

“You look like Barbie,”  you mumble against his lips, into the warmth of his mouth.  You ignore the way he laughs, swallowing it down with a pass of your tongue and too much spit swapped, a string of saliva caught between you when you come up for air. 

Somehow, you’re still lightheaded, all your thoughts framed into the familiar silhouette of the boy beneath you.  Cherry red lips - your fault, from all your biting and teasing and the balm you’d applied earlier - and blond hair.  Who would’ve known that was your weakness?

(Deep down, you know Jungkook as a whole is the issue.  That it’s your stupid handsome boyfriend with his lopsided smile and bunny teeth, dimples and that scar on his cheek.  This is just a new layer to be explored, another reason you love him added to the Jungkook Best Boy jar that sits front and centre in your mind’s eye.)

“Don’t say that,”  he groans, equal parts reproach and affection, palms resting where they belong, nestled over your spine.  Long fingers toy with the soft cotton of your thong, brushing over the seamless material with small repetitive motions. 

You realise then his hands aren’t the only things heating up.

The two of you have an understanding, an abiding awareness of the boundaries of your relationship and the roles you take on.  Best friend, occasional sucker for the sake of a TikTok, lover.

He knows how much you hate your dirty laundry being aired - does his very best to never post anything that might be misconstrued, ensures he only ever portrays you in a good light because the internet could be cruel.  (Even if he argued with you in the quiet of your home, he’d keep you safe outside of the four walls.)  

You know how he needs his quiet time but that sometimes, a night out was unavoidable, a part of his life he - and by extension you - couldn’t always say no to.  (Even if you were achy and tired by midnight, glaring down at your phone as he made his rounds, exchanged contact details and rambled about shit that meant nothing.)

He’s learnt to make your eggs the way you love them:  soft in the centre, covered with too much pepper.  He never washes your clothes in hot water (not after The Great Sweater debacle) and he always makes sure not to use your special memory foam pillow.  

You kiss him goodnight without fail and play with his hair until he falls asleep;  you bury your face against his chest when he’s had a long day, signing your love with the felt-tip of your lips.  You bring him fresh cut fruit when he’s been working for more than three hours and wash his hair when he’s stressed. 

Knowing each other was easy;  loving each other was like breathing.

This, though, is different.  New.  Special.  

He’s never been like this before, glazed over in the eyes, patience wearing thin.  Sat so well, picture perfect beneath you and cornsilk crown lighting his entire expression up like a halo, he’s ethereal. 

“Baby,”  he whines, grits through his teeth as you roll your hips that much slower, the glide impossibly smooth thanks to the lychee watermelon lube he’d received to his PO box.  (One of the items you hadn’t thrown away from that package, together with a handful of other toys that’d come in handy over the months.)

You’re shameless, soothing a hand across his cheek, thumb slipping past his lips.  (You ignore the noise of indignation, meet it with a twinkling laugh of your own.)  It sweeps over his tongue, pressing down in tandem with the second sound - one that echoes out of his chest, a growl that pitches into a whine and makes your ears buzz.  “Hi, baby.”

“Stop teasing.”  It’s practically begging - or as close to it as Jungkook will get.  It draws a smile and another pass of your thumb, gliding across his gums to slot against the interior of his cheek.  You’ve got him fishhooked, immobile, even as he glares up at you.

(He’s so, so handsome.  Looks utterly out of it even as he tries to harden his gaze, coerce you into doing what he wants with that stare that makes your heart lurch pathetically in your chest.)

“You don’t like this?”

You know he does - that he loves being pampered.  That he’ll rarely ask, instead pouting at you from wherever he sits until you turn to putty under his gaze and smother him in all the love you have to offer.

“I do.  I just—”  The rest of his words don’t come, stolen by a gasp when you grind against him, swollen head of his cock bumping against your clit.  He’s making a mess of you both, back arching, hips rising, hands fisted into the sheets even as he chases friction like a dog does its tail.  The warmth between your legs is so close he looks as if he’ll lose his mind, rutting against your cunt like just the right angle might get him what he wants.  “Fuck, baby.”

“I’m trying,”  you retort, mouthful of teasing that only earns you another glare, some poor semblance of one as he bites into the webbing of your hand, bucks up impatiently.

“Please.”  He tries again, a different tactic this time, all sugar-spun sweetness.  Strawberry shortcake rather than sour cherry pie, so eager to get what he wants that he’s not above pulling out all the stops.  A hand risen from the sheets, digits decorated in ink swimming over your skin, sinking into the meat of your thigh.

(He doesn’t push though.  Knows you’ll pull the moment he does.)

“Please?”  An echo chamber, endlessly teasing, and a ducked head, lips finding the sweat-slick column of his throat.  Just one drag of your tongue has him crumbling further, careful composure slipping with each swivel of your hips, the edge of your teeth.  There’s nothing but desperation radiating off him, demand choked back when you drift lower, tracing over his chest, teasing him in the ways you know best.  

It’s all so unnecessary, drawing out what he wants until he’s a goner, three seconds from combusting beneath you.  You’d give him anything he ever asked for - offer it all up on a silver plate, a meal fit for a king.  This is just fun, different and exciting. 

You relent with a minor adjustment, settling yourself against him, face dropped into the crook of his neck.  “Slowly.”

He repeats after you, uncertain and hopeful;  his hand falls further, warmth descending to pull you close, hold you still.   As much as he needs this - needs you - he loves the slow burn just as much.  The stutter of his pulse gives him away, erratic beneath your touch.  He’s a thousand miles above the clouds, floating on cloud nine;  every second passed is another tingle of his toes, a tightening of the coil in his stomach.

When he aligns himself against your core, pre-cum pearling over his tip, he does exactly as you’ve asked.  Sinks into you at such a leisurely pace you wonder if you might be the one who splinters apart, shatters into a million tiny pieces at the way he splits you open.  

“Good?”  Jungkook asks so nicely it’s impossible for you to say no, to deny him this tiny bit of reassurance.  

(Maybe it’s the way he looks, crowned in glittering gold, painted by Fra Angelico.  Or maybe it’s how his smile spills like sunshine, a peachy pink horizon dragging over the apples of his cheeks, burnt red like their namesake.)

(Whatever it is, it’s everything you want, packed perfectly and pouting.)

“Good boy,”  you purr, breath hitching once he’s sheathed to the hilt, seated so deeply within that you swear you can feel him in your throat.

You’ve never felt so full before - close to overflow, taunted and taxed by ridges and veins, each flex of his hips that drives him somehow further within your fluttering walls.  So full you might burst, that you can’t possibly hold yourself together when he begins to move, fucking you tenderly, as if he can feel the weight of the moment.  

There’s something happening.  A shift in the air, in the axis of your planet that revolves around him.  It falls on its side, spins wildly out of control, and you’re emotional.  It’s not just his hair - that gilded crown he wears, heavy heavy heavy like aureate coin - or the impossible dark of his eyes - blown out, an entire galaxy devoured by the supermassive black hole that is his pupils.  It’s the things you can’t see, the pieces beneath skin, soft and jammy, the tongue-tart sweetness.

(The thing with Jungkook is that he doesn’t let go, refuses to fully submit, always so careful to regulate his voice when things get to be too much.  He’ll blink back his tears, stifle a sob, even as his breath disappears from nothing but a delicate brush of his chest.)

You take his vulnerability as a treasure, hold it close and craft a chest for its home, promise to keep it safe even while you're the one who poses the most danger.  When it’s your teeth and tongue that eviscerates the soft of his flesh, makes him keen and gasp, heart pounding like hooves, beat imprinted against, under, into your palms.

When he begs you to move - manages the request in a broken articulation that makes you giggle - you give, swivel your hips in a figure eight, an infinity of motion that never ends.  

You take all he has to offer and sing your praise into the wet of his mouth.  Lick over teeth and gums and trade spit for love;  know there’s only more where that came from, that the fountain begs to overflow as he finally - finally - breaks that much more, gripping your hips gentle as can be.  Hands soothe up and down, an unspoken plea in how he thumbs your hip bones, taps hopefully over the small of your lower back.

He doesn’t need to speak for you to hear him. 

It’s more than a kiss forming against your skin.  It’s a confession of adoration, sealed by the frame of his mouth, cemented by the sting of his teeth.  It’s I love you without saying it, plastering the pecks along your spine, placing them safely in all the spaces you’ve created for him.

It’s also an apology, because he’s just torn your castle to pieces, shattered your entire fantasy into smithereens.

He hadn’t expected you to react the way you had, rolling off him as if he hadn’t just been chasing the sweet bliss of release, splitting your walls and making you wail above him.  It has him pouting, utilising the one thing that melts you down like candle wax.  

“Baby,”  he whines, reaching for you, needy and horny and so hard he imagines all the blood has rushed from his head straight to his cock.  Everything spins when he moves with you, scrambles across the California king to paw at your hip.  

He’d been so good for you - wasn’t that enough?

“Don’t,”  you grumble, searing his insides with just one look.  (It shouldn’t be as hot as it is.)

“But—”  A plea punctuated by groping hands, eager as always, smoothing over the swell of your ass, flesh squeezing between knuckles.  He’d normally let this go - fuck into his closed fist in the shower after he’s done something to cut playtime short - but he can’t help it now.  He’s been on the edge for so long, lit up in neon that demands to be seen, heard, felt.

“Don’t dye it again.”  

Oh?

That has him reeling, laughing, such a stupid grin across his face.  It devours everything else, spearing dimples into place as he pulls you against him.  You can feel his smile forming against your skin, the wet drag of his tongue as he sucks a welt into the sensitive spot of your shoulder.

“You wanna play with Barbie, baby?”  It’s such a stupid line - utterly sophomoric and riddled with teasing and yet the delivery has you shivering in his arms, equally childish huff splitting your lips.

Jungkook doesn’t listen to you often - not about silly things like this - but he figures he can, just this once.

“I won’t,”  he chirps, sneaking another kiss, stamping another smooch.  It’s working exactly as he wants, stilling your protesting limbs as he cages you to him, slips his hand back where he most wants to be.  The glide is perfect, a mixture of arousal and fruity lubricant;  he slips a finger in without resistance, grinding his palm against your clit. 

“R-really?”  Of course you don’t believe him.  He messes with you too often, plays too many pranks.  (He deserves that.) 

His promise comes too easy, driven by how nice you feel, how pretty you sound when he presses another digit in along the first.  The scissor of his fingers is languid, exploring for the spots that make you breathless as he hums a noise of affirmation against your neck;  he fucks you open as if he has to, as if you aren’t already dripping, eagerly sucking him in.  “Really.”  

“Put it in then, Ken doll.”

He laughs - and then he does.  In bed, with your knee hooked over his, pace slow and sure and sinful.  In the shower, bent over with his hands bruising your hips.  In the kitchen for a late night snack, another apple in his mouth and your hands in his hair.

Maybe blonds did have more fun. 

tag list.  @neverthefirstchoice​ @youwannabelostandnotbefound​ @codeinebelle​

[robininthelabyrinth]

I'd love more from your deaging NHS AU verse! Maybe little NHS hanging out more with WWX? Or little NHS meeting JC? Or getting spoiled by JYL?

sequel to Little (deaging NHS - need to read that first)

Hosting another sect leader was both a burden and a privilege.

The burden was mostly logistical – although they’d reclaimed the Lotus Pier, they hadn’t managed to fix it all back up, and it was one thing for all of them to be living in a state more fit for wild bandits than a Great Sect but another thing entirely for them to let someone else see them do so.

Jiang Cheng couldn’t do everything himself, even if he was trying to, so Jiang Yanli stepped up to assist: she turned the kitchens into something livable, requisitioned disciples and laborers to focus on the main hall and the guest rooms, supervised the hiring of those who did the laundry and removed waste, all the important things needed to make their home an inviting one, as long as you were careful to only look at the main parts and not the rest.

Luckily, their guest was Nie Mingjue, not any of the other sect leaders, and he didn’t care. That was, Jiang Yanli suspected, the only reason that Jiang Cheng hadn’t had a full-on heart attack as the date of the man’s approach arrived.

Sure enough, he arrived with as little fanfare as possible, greeted them politely, and promptly sequestered himself, his younger brother, and his chief disciples into a room with Jiang Cheng to discuss sect business. By the time they emerged for dinner, Jiang Cheng looked worn out but immensely pleased, they’d signed a half-dozen treaties, and Jiang Yanli had enough food to feed a small army waiting for them. A good thing, too, since apparently the Nie ate like they’d been starving the week before their meal. Even Nie Huaisang made the food in front of him vanish at lightning-quick speed, and he didn’t even have the build to explain away where all of it was going.

By far the most interesting aspect of it for Jiang Yanli, however, was that Wei Wuxian had made an appearance.

This was something of a rarity recently. Something about the war had hurt him, deeply, and that reason, or for whatever reason, he was very obviously avoiding Jiang Cheng – and, as a result, neglecting the duties that ought to be his as chief disciple. Jiang Yanli knew that it was unintentional, that he still cared for both her and Jiang Cheng, for the sect. But it didn’t make it any easier for them that rather than helping them, he instead spent his days skulking around wine shops, and nothing either of them said seemed to make any difference.  

Both she and Jiang Cheng had already resigned themselves to Wei Wuxian snubbing the Nie sect entirely, but to their mutual surprise he was there with a smile that Jiang Yanli hadn’t seen in weeks, boisterous and loud and trying to steal some of the plates of Nie Huaisang’s food whenever the other man turned to say something to Jiang Cheng. Without success, since being notoriously poor at any martial skill did not keep Nie Huaisang from effectively slapping away Wei Wuxian’s wandering fingers without even looking.

He even volunteered to show them around Yunmeng the next morning – meaning a walk by the river, since the Lotus Pier itself was largely not showable in its current condition – and Jiang Cheng agreed to the idea with no little relief, since he needed some time to get the treaties filed and implemented.

“I didn’t know you two had gotten so close to the Nie sect during the war,” Jiang Yanli murmured to Jiang Cheng, who rubbed his face in exhaustion and joy.

“I think it’s because it’s a reminder of happier days, with Nie Huaisang?” he said hesitantly. “Maybe? Anyway, can you make sure they get snacks along with their tea this evening? Chifeng-zun said he was full when he finished his plate, but Nie Huaisang was definitely eying his neighbor’s bowl longingly at the end there.”

Jiang Yanli hid a smile with her hand. “Of course, A-Cheng. Leave it to me.”

She made an entire pot of soup, plus a handful of side dishes, and brought up the portion to the rooms set aside for the main Nie sect herself. It wasn’t just to give them face, though of course that was important given that the Nie were their most important allies barring maybe the Jin sect – it ought to be the Jin sect, but they were playing games with it, and certain overtures by Madame Jin had led Jiang Cheng to speculate that they hoped to finalize the revival of the engagement between Jiang Yanli and Jin Zixuan that Jin Guangshan had unilaterally raised not long ago before agreeing to provide any actual aid.

They hadn’t yet decided if it was worth playing the game back, hinting and implying and leaving themselves wiggle room in case Jiang Yanli really didn’t want to marry Jin Zixuan in the end; luckily, this visit by the Nie sect would put off the necessity of that for a good while. Maybe even for good, depending on how good some of those trading contracts were, and Jiang Cheng’s expression gave Jiang Yanli some hope.

Still, despite the absolutely critical importance of the relationship, that wasn’t why Jiang Yanli decided to go act the part of a servant personally.

Instead, she was hoping to use the opportunity see if she could get some insight into whatever they’d done to make Wei Wuxian smile like that, and to see if she could replicate it.

She wasn’t expecting to hear Wei Wuxian’s voice from the guest quarters they’d assigned to the Nie sect.

Not only because it was a little too late for any visit to be appropriate, but because Wei Wuxian had been avoiding the Jiang clan rooms for – rather a while, now. He wasn’t even sleeping in his own bedroom.

And yet – here he was.

Talking like a child.

Jiang Yanli’s heart stopped briefly in her chest when she heard the familiar whine Wei Wuxian liked to adopt when he was playing as A-Xian: it had always been their special game, her favorite way to indulge her mischievous little brother who sometimes liked to be fed and hugged and tucked in at night, and she would have sharp words for anyone who dared criticize it. But – in front of another sect leader –

“A-Xian, stop,” Nie Mingjue’s deep voice said firmly, his amusement audible even through the door. “Give Huaisang the toy back.”

“But da-ge,” Wei Wuxian whined, even though Nie Huaisang’s laugh made clear that he had handed back whatever toy they were talking about. “Why does he get to have the toy and I don’t?”

“I brought you three toys, you brat, and Huaisang only has one. Not everything is for sharing; some things are yours and yours alone.”

Jiang Yanli reflected briefly on the differences in child-rearing techniques between the sects – if it had been Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng, she would have encouraged Jiang Cheng to share, and instructed Wei Wuxian to share in return – before realizing that Nie Mingjue was reacting to Wei Wuxian’s nonsense with extraordinary calmness. Almost as if he’d dealt with it before.

Almost as if he accepted it.

Jiang Yanli steeled her spine and knocked.

“I brought some snacks, Sect Leader,” she called.

There was a brief moment of quiet – some brief murmuring in low voices – but at last he said, “Enter,” and she did.

Wei Wuxian was sitting on the floor with his face buried in Nie Mingjue’s thigh, Nie Mingjue’s hand petting through his hair in a calming gesture; behind them, a small child of around seven, dressed in oversized Nie robes, lolled around on his stomach, his legs kicked up in the air, as he toyed with some puzzle game. Jiang Yanli hadn’t realized the Nie sect had brought along a child – one certainly hadn’t been present at dinner – but under the circumstances she opted not to comment.

“I thought you might still be hungry,” she said with a smile. “So I made some snacks, and soup.”

“Soup!” Wei Wuxian exclaimed, lifting his head to reveal red cheeks. “Da-ge, you have to try shijie’s soup!”

“I intend to,” Nie Mingjue said. He was looking at Jiang Yanli thoughtfully. “Would you care to join us, Mistress Jiang?”

“I’d be happy to,” Jiang Yanli said, though she’d originally intended no such thing, and settled down to serve it out. “Thank you for taking care of A-Xian.”

“It’s nothing,” Nie Mingjue said. “A charming child, and one that speaks very highly of you. You must be very proud.”

“I am,” she agreed, and from the corner of her eye saw all the tension drain out of Wei Wuxian’s shoulders at her affirmation of their game. He scrabbled over to her side, abruptly affectionate, and cuddled up. “A-Xian, no! I need that hand to serve the soup. Didn’t you just say that you want Nie-da-ge to have some?”

Wei Wuxian pouted, but withdrew his sticky tentacles. The child on the bed laughed again and rolled over and up to his feet, hopping over to where Wei Wuxian was. “Wei-xiong can play with me while we wait.”

“Okay,” Wei Wuxian agreed at once. “We can play tag!”

“Don’t break anything,” Jiang Yanli said, and discovered to her amusement that Nie Mingjue had said the same exact thing at the same exact moment. He smiled crookedly at her, very briefly – his expression was not one usually given for smiling, typically stern and grim even when it was neutral, and the expression made him look suddenly younger.

“Younger siblings,” he said, an explanation and an excuse, and abruptly Jiang Yanli knew who the child must be. She didn’t know how it was that Nie Huaisang had physically regressed into childhood, as well as doing so emotionally the way Wei Wuxian did, but she supposed it didn’t really matter.

“Yes,” she said, and smiled back at him. “A-Xian likes it when I feed him his meals. Does…?”

Nie Mingjue shook his head. “Huaisang is very proud,” he said, voice fond. “He wouldn’t accept that sort of help from me, though perhaps he might accept it from you if he sees A-Xian getting a treat.”

“Children that age can be very jealous of each other,” Jiang Yanli agreed. “It’s a good thing that A-Xian is five today, so he can play with his friend, and not three. Maybe he can be three another time.”

“I must admit I haven’t noticed much difference so far,” Nie Mingjue remarked. “He’s still always clamoring for hugs.”

“Da-ge gives the best hugs,” Nie Huaisang said loyally.

Wei Wuxian looked a little shifty, but Jiang Yanli nodded at him supportively and he smiled. “They’re really good, shijie,” he confided in her. “He can pick me up!”

Jiang Yanli’s smile broadened, even as Nie Mingjue’s shoulders went up a little in embarrassment.

“We’re all good at different things,” she assured him. “Nie-da-ge is good at hugs, but I bet I’m better at doing your hair, right?”

“Yes! Shijie’s the best!”

“I want my hair done by Jiang-jiejie,” Nie Huaisang declared, eyes avid. “Can I?”

“After we eat,” Nie Mingjue said. “And only if you ask very nicely, and Mistress Jiang says yes.”

“I’ll say yes,” she said, and then, as an aside to Nie Mingjue, added, “You can call me Jiang-meimei if you like. If I’m calling you Nie-da-ge and all.”

He smiled again.

At some point, Jiang Yanli would need to examine how exactly Wei Wuxian had ended up taking Nie Mingjue as one of his caretakers, as well as how Nie Huaisang managed a full-fledged bodily transformation – and they’d need to bring Jiang Cheng in on this, somehow, even though he was neither caretaker nor little, simply because he would be jealous at being left out. And there was still Wei Wuxian’s unusual behavior, his inexplicable distance from all of them…

But that was a problem for later.

For now, they could just be there for them.

[haifengg]

Pairing: NanamixGN!Reader

Note: I think I got this ask quite a while ago but due to my hiatus it got postponed a million times. Now that I am slowly coming back and am publishing the bits and pieces I wrote during being away this A-Z is finally leaving my drafts as well.

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?) Given his S/O is a sorcerer as well I think he would limit PDA at work to a minimum. Even if they are officially together or even married. He just likes to separate work and home. Tho it doesn’t mean that he is not making small intimate gestures at work like randomly dropping in with coffee or - when they are on a mission - sending a text asking how they are doing.

At home he is pretty affectionate. Randomly pulling them in for a hug, giving small back rubs when they are doing the dishes after he cooked. This kind of thing.

B = Before (What were they like when they had a crush?) Distant. Nanami would probably be a person who maybe actually mistakes the feeling for some other emotion at first. Leaving him confused about why he thinks about them so much. The poor man would likely be irritated every time they are nice to him. Why the heck doesn’t his heart stop pounding? And why is he suddenly excited to go to work? Disappointed when he is not assigned the same mission as them? Or - if they aren’t a sorcerer - sad when a mission takes him away from wherever he met them for too long?

C = Confession (What was their confession like?) Well-planned and straight forward. Nanami was already observing them for a while before making a move. Although he doesn’t actually confess it is pretty obvious when he likes someone because it happens so rarely. Just imagine him asking someone out for dinner. That gives away so much - don’t you agree?

D = Date (What was the first official date they went on?) If we don’t count the dinner mentioned above … I guess it would be something like a gallery. Nanami would definitely want to test his s/o’s taste in art because it tells a lot about a person’s character. What kind of art they prefer (paintings, photography, sculptures, … ) and how they look at it as well.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?) Professionally. He would state the fact on why they aren’t compatible anymore and what made him draw this conclusion. I don’t think either one of them would cheat on the other mainly because Nanami wouldn’t get into a relationship with someone capable of doing that in the first place (I hope). He would sit down with his (not) s/o and talk it through. There might be tears on the other side but not on his. He thought about it a lot and made peace with his feelings before starting this conversation.

F = Fights (What would fights look like? What are things that upset them?) Kento barely looses his temper. And if he does I wouldn’t say that it is necessarily a bad thing. Getting him so worked up about something does only mean he cares. Fights would mostly be on the calmer/diplomatic side. He might be upset about something but there is no need for him to yell or anything. If the problem can be resolved just by talking about it - great! Why waste his precious energy on negative things, when he can use them elsewhere?

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?) We all know - and all those rough sm*t fan fictions can’t proof me wrong - that he probably is the most gentle character in entire JJK. He despises the violence of his job therefore he doesn’t want to inflict pain or anything on anyone on his good side. Especially his S/O. Nanami has the most gentle touch, fleeing kisses, he will hold them tight but never smother them.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?) As mentioned above: Tight and secure. Or soft. His S/O almost automatically buries their face in the crook of his neck because - who wouldn’t. Is there anything else I have to say about hugs by Nanami Kento? Yes. Am I able to put it into words? No. It’s just a very overwhelming feeling - that’s all.

I = Intimacy (What is their favorite form of intimacy? Do they have problems with it?) For him I think it would be things where they take care of him. While he shows his love through cooking and providing (which he takes a lot of pride from), he loves being taken care of as well. Maybe in departments he doesn’t know so much about. Like skincare. If his S/O teases him about his wrinkles and stern look he would gladly accept any advice in skincare from them, let them do their magic with face massages and serums. He doesn’t even care if it has any effect on his skin - he just loves the attention he gets and thrives on the feeling how much his S/O cares about him (and his skin apparently).

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?) This one I am really indecisive about. I can see him get more jealous that we would expect him too - which would be a nice surprise tbh. But also not jealous at all because he is confident. Kento knows what his S/O likes about him and he also knows what separates him from other men. What makes him special. I think the times he gets jealous are the days he doesn’t get to spent with his S/O because of work or a mission. Which rather results in being mad at Jujutsu Tech than jealous of someone else.

K = Kisses (Are they a good kisser? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?) Forehead. Kisses. It doesn’t matter what height there S/O is. It is one of the most protective gestures and he enjoys giving those as much as his S/O enjoys receiving them.

The back of the hand cheesy kisses. Because they are his everything, he wants to treat them like it. Nanami knows it’s cheesy but neither one of them thinks too much about it. When they sit across the table, fingers sloppily interlocked on the table top, he occasionally picks up their hand and places a soft kiss on the back of it. Almost absent-minded.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?) He is not very fond of them. Not saying that he won’t love and do everything for his own kids but other people’s kids are usually a nuisance for him. If they are loud or misbehaving he is really not having it. Though he would never lash out or raise his voice against them/their parents. ‘Children’ as in ‘his students’ … he always makes sure to treat them as children in a way he wants them safe/won’t put them in unnecessary danger.

M = Messages (How often do they text his S/O?) Kento strikes me as a kind of guy who doesn’t text often. Mostly because in his line of work sharing attention could easily be his downfall or worse. He will let his s/o know if he’s running late or occasionally ask if there is anything they need from the store or things like that but aside from practical messages he doesn’t text much.

Though if he is on a long mission and away from his s/o for quite a time span he usually rather calls them than text.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?) Nights as in ‘Nights Out’? Date nights? Well, he is a foodie so dinner is always a popular option. He takes the time to carefully research about the restaurant and the menu. If the rotate dishes, he will make sure they’re going at the exactly right season to get the best culinary experience possible.

Nanami is old fashioned. So he will hold the door for them, pull back the chair … helps them into their coat.

He also likes going to the movies. The intimacy of the dark theatre gives him the confidence to reach out for their hand or have his arm around their shoulder. Since he usually limits PDA in public this is exciting for him.

O = Opinion (Would they ask for their S/O’s opinion a lot? How important is it in terms of decisions?) Probably more than I would expect him too. Maybe not about the smaller things but decisions that involve the both of them he would definitely ask.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?) Due to the time he spends exposed to Gojo this man has the patience of a saint. Literally. He rarely snaps at his S/O.

Q = Quizzes (How does a bar trivia night teamed up with them look like?) Stressed. Yes, this man in very educated and cultured but imagine him sitting in a loud-ass bar, having to answer questions about the transformers or Megan Thee Stallion. Absolutely absurd. How old he must feel …

R = Remember (How much do they remember about their S/O or their relationship in general?) Not everything but a lot. He will remember little things they mentioned early on in the relationship and bring it up again later. He also uses this ability for presents and such. As well as in fights. If they think they can outtalk him with something you accusedly said or didn’t say some time ago - I suggest they surrender, because he will remember much better.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?) Very Protective. I mean yes, he knows that they can stand up for themselves but why should they have to do that if he is around? One of the big perks dating him is that he is who he is and that his presence confuses most people. So he might as well use it. Not so much in a physical way but rather in addressing the people bothering his S/O directly in the typical manner of his.

I think his understanding of being protected equals being taken care of which plays into the skincare thing I mentioned earlier. It is not so much physical procreation from danger but preserving a future together where one cares about the other deeply and only wants their best.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?) Medium effort. He prepares and researches but he rarely comes up with a new idea. He knows what he likes and his S/O probably does too. His work is so stressful and has close to no repetition so that he enjoys doing the same things on dates over and over. That does not mean it will get boring. Because Nanami sometimes thrives on going the extra mile. There is a restaurant across the country that he really wants to dine at? Buckle up - he is going on a vacation. Short trips or spa weekends are also things he appreciates.

Since he remembers dates and anniversaries well he is usually well prepared for those occasions. He puts a lot of thought into presents and barely ever gifts useless things. He does not like to have a lot of stuff laying around so what he gives to people usually serves a purpose.

U = Unique (What makes them unique as a S/O?) Literally everything I mentioned above. Namai Kento is a unique mix of all his traits. A very balanced person.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?) Well … he wears the same freaking suit everyday so … but yes I think cares about his looks and hygiene in general. As far as clothing goes he probably has one brand he is loyal too, which automatically sets his fashion style in stone as well. He has the same haircut for quite a while and sees no point in changing it.

Overall just the classic hetero dude who ones figured out what works for him and stuck with it. lol.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without their S/O? Yes. His S/O is the other side of him. Is what balances his inner peace. Without them he worries too much, stresses too much. He needs them to tell him it’s going to be okay.

X = X-Ray (How transparent are they?) Nanami doesn’t actually tells them everything but will disclose if they ask. He just doesn’t think they are interested in small details about him.

Y = Yuck (Everyone has flaws. What is theirs?) He. Doesn’t. Do. The. Dishes.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?) Kento never lets go of his S/O. Which can be annoying. And suffocating. Especially in summer. He is not clingy and they don’t fall asleep like this but in the morning he always spoons them or weirdly holds their hand. Sometimes toes interlocked lmao. Which makes them even more lonely when they are apart, because they got used to it way too quickly.

@kpopsnowball @soleilsuhh @jeonghanmoon @himitsu-luna

@sagedevans @shampoocifer @your-consulting-fangirl @gwynsapphire​

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