#the orphanage headmaster

[inamagicalhallucination]

i get so PISSED when ppl r like "bsd is saying hte headmaster was a good guy" because no?????????????? the headmaster's backstory isnt revealed for us to be like "omg he loved atsushi after all <33" its to show that hey, this character has a very twisted adn fucked up logic, and yes, he may have cared for atsushi in some type of way, but what he did was inexcusable and unjustifiable and the actions of a pathetic desperate man who should not have been around kids;;; we're not supposed to forgive the headmaster, we're not even supposed to like him

we're supposed to see him as human fucked up and horrific but human. his actions have "reasons" but those reasons are NOT justifying his actions, theyre explaining his mindset;;; we learn about the headmaster, because it explains the complicated relationship atsushi has with his past (the one person he knew, who had authority over him like how a parent might, abused and tortured atsushi, leaving him with complicated feelings because he hates the headmaster, he wants the headmaster to approve of him, he wants to know why the headmaster hates him, he wants to kill the headmaster, he wants answers to his abuse, he wants to know whats wrong with him, the headmaster was the only constant atsushi had) because it shows that the headmaster was not some big evil, he was human, and in his humanity is his evil --- he didn't hurt atsushi because he was some sort of big bad creature who had no understanding of pain love or humanity, he was a human, who knew what his actions were, who knew what he was doing, but chose to do it anyway, because of his own twisted thinking --- he's evil because he's conscious of his actions and he still chooses to do them, he's evil because he's human, and acts inhumane despite that

a character having a sad backstory, a character being dynamic, a character not existing as a flat perception of another character, does not justify their actions, nor does it redeem them. it explains them to us, the readers -- it's gives us an insight to them, it doesn't justify them, it doesn't excuse them, it explains them.

editing to add:

atsushi crying over the headmaster isnt because the headmasters suddenly a good guy, atsushi is crying because he has complicated feelings towards him, including grief --- yes he's grieving someone who was only evil to him, because atsushi hated him, wanted to understand why he was doing this to him, wanted to kill him, wanted to prove him wrong -- because the headmaster was a constant to him, he was all he knew for a long time;; he was his frame of reference for the outside world, his frame of reference to everything, other people, himself, family -- he's grieving, he's relieved, its complicated, its messy, because atsushi is feeling illogical human emotions, not because he's forgiving him

[shininas-ideals]

Dive to Atsushi's heart!

[degenerateshinji]

skyetchin'

[asagirisfavoritepen]

Wait a fucking sec. In SB, we found out that Chuuya's dad was a doctor, just like irl Chuuya's dad. Does that mean that the family is pretty much the same for the others too? Does it mean that Dazai's father is a politician? Does it mean that Aku's family had a milk production business? Does that mean that Atsushi's dad was a teacher? We really need more background for all the characters. We basically don't know anything!

[ssaraexposs]

Atsushi suffered more than Jesus 😭

[filledtothebrimothy]

Idk if this is ever talked about in the fandom but I think some really interesting parallels between Atsushi and Akutagawa are actually the people who took them in- the orphanage headmaster and Dazai respectively- and how they were pretty damn similar (at least at the time)

First of all, both Atsushi and Akutagawa both had little to no connection with their parents. They’re never mentioned because neither of them really knew them in the first place.

And then, both the headmaster and Dazai “saved” them from their shitty living situations (the word “saved” being in quotes because Atsushi and Akutagawa were simply moved from one shitty situation to another). The headmaster said things like “Compared to what your parents did, this hardly even counts as abuse,” maybe trying to justify his actions, and Dazai promised to give Akutagawa a reason to live, which made Akutagawa’s mental state pretty much dependent on Dazai.

Dazai physically and mentally abused the hell out of Akutagawa, as did the headmaster to Atsushi, while both simultaneously taking up this role of “caretaker” for them. The one main difference between them was that Atsushi actively hated the headmaster. And then there’s Akutagawa, who, as we all know, practically revered Dazai and did everything to get his acknowledgment, his approval.

And an impact I think these different outlooks had on the two boys was how they each treated Kyouka.

Atsushi knew how awful abuse was and viewed the way he was treated in a negative light, so he wanted to save Kyouka from the abuse she was facing. But with Akutagawa, he viewed the way he was treated in a positive light (for the most part, anyway), and so of course he’s going to try to treat Kyouka the way Dazai treated him. Most importantly, Akutagawa tried to give Kyouka a reason to live. Moreover, he thought her reason to live was simply to be an assassin as her ability was perfect for bloodshed, which is what he thought was his own reason to live given to him by Dazai (even if Dazai had tried to tell him it’s stupid to only use his ability offensively).

Something I also think about is how Dazai joined the mafia for his own reason to live, promised one to Akutagawa which became why he joined the mafia, and then Akutagawa tried to push that trend onto Kyouka

While Dazai gave Akutagawa a reason to live, the headmaster made Atsushi want to prove he’s worthy of living. Obviously, the Guild arc points out the rift this creates between Atsushi and Akutagawa and their motivations (even if this was from before Akutagawa’s past was shown).

Now, back to the actual topic at hand after going off on a sort of side tangent, there’s one more thing that makes the headmaster and PM Dazai parallels is their own backgrounds and how they affect how they treat Atsushi and Akutagawa.

Now, if I’m being completely honest, I don’t feel like rereading the chapter that described the headmaster’s past nor do I have the energy right now to look at his wiki (it is currently 3:22 AM as of writing this sentence), so I’m just gonna be going off my memory. BUT.

If I remember correctly, the headmaster was raised in an orphanage himself, and one that was in WAY worse conditions than the one he ran. Imagine the abuse the kids at Atsushi’s orphanage felt but worse. Then there’s Dazai, who was taken in by Mori of all people after a failed suicide tempt as a young teenager. Mori abused Dazai (more mentally than physically), and kinda… yknow, corrupted him.

So, both the orphanage headmaster and Dazai came from places where they were victims of the own abuse they committed.

[leodehurlvant]

Atsushi’s backstory is wild man

[akuarchives]

Chapter 39

[anti-dazai-blog]

The fact that there really isn’t much more Dazai content in the main manga for me to cover here is absolutely fascinating

[romance-incubomp3]

I don’t think there AREN’T things to criticize about how bsd handles its themes of abuse but the way it humanizes its abusive characters and depicts them as people who’ve had their worldviews so thoroughly damaged as to habitually hurt others is something I do appreciate. without making their victims forgive them or be forced to reconcile with them…

[chester-god-0]

What's going to happen when a mental young woman gets isekaied into the body of an asshole? Lots of confusion for everyone.

So, the Headmaster has lost his (her) mind, the caretakers are confused and the children are scared. At least until he (she) builds them a playground to escape the dawning relization that he (she) is trapped.

Have fun reading!

[thedragonagelesbian]

it is very important to me that as far as fantasy standards go, cyrus is kind of just a guy, in both his aesthetics and origin story

[chizue-witchery]

⚜️. *. ⋆ Fandom: Bungou Stray Dogs

⚜️. *. ⋆ Pairing: Nakajima Atsushi & Orphanage Headmaster

⚜️. *. ⋆ Character/s: Nakajima Atsushi, Orphanage Headmaster

⚜️. *. ⋆ Summary: "They don't care about you."

It's something the headmaster inside his head has been telling him the entire time, never saying anything else.

He wonders if the headmaster is an illusion that tells him what he's really thinking.

⚜️. *. ⋆ Word Count: 1,051

⚜️. *. ⋆ Warnings/Tags: implied/referenced child abuse, angst, emotional hurt, self-doubt

⚜️. *. ⋆ Prompts/Squares Filled: "They don't care about you." || @whumptober • "I never want to see you again." || 100 Ways to say "I Hate You" Challenge Prompt#28

Whumptober2023 Masterlist || 100WTSIHY Masterlist

AO3

A/N: i'm behind the whumptober prompts by a day, but I'm hoping to be able to catch up to it. there may come a time wherein I'll post two whumptober entries in one day.

"They don't care about you."

It's something the headmaster inside his head has been telling him the entire time, never saying anything else.

Atsushi wonders why it's different this time. He wonders why the headmaster tells him those words whenever he's near any of the Armed Detective Agency members.

He wonders if the headmaster is an illusion that tells him what he's really thinking.

But that wouldn't make any sense— the Agency is his family. They never did or said anything to make him think of it.

All they have been doing is providing him a home, a job, a reason to live more.

So why—

Why is he believing the Headmaster's words?

A loud snap interrupts Atsushi from his thoughts and he stares up to where the headmaster is, eyes blown wide in fear; body frozen and unable to get himself to move. The Headmaster's eyes only stay at him and Atsushi wonders why and how he is still alive.

Maybe this is from an ability user; maybe this is from a very realistic nightmare he has. Maybe, maybe, maybe—

A strong flinch spreads across his body as he backs away, away, away into the corner when the opening of the cell startles him.

Into the corner where it's safe; into the corner where no one can attack him from behind; into the corner where he can huddle in.

He is safe in the corner.

Safe, safe, safe—

"Atsushi."

The person in question looks at the orphanage headmaster. He doesn't say anything out of fear of what might happen to him.

He wonders why he's back, back, back in this mindset that he's escaped from a year and a half ago. He wonders why he feels so small while the headmaster is big, big, big.

The headmaster opens his mouth to talk but Atsushi couldn't hear anything other than the ringing noise that's getting louder by the second. His vision blurs and everything is muffled as he looks down to see small, small hands covered in bandages; small hands that he doesn't remember having. He looks at his clothes and it's the same ones he always wore when he was staying at the orphanage; the same ragged clothing he always got while the other children had better clothing.

Fear, fear, fear courses through his veins once he sees the chain around leg.

Why, why, why is he back here? Why is he back at the orphanage?

What happened? Did he get attacked by an ability user? If so, why back in the orphanage? Why, why, why— he was so close to being free from them.

Being free from them is a concept Atsushi never got to grasp but when he's finally closed it, he's been dragged back to the hell of where he used to live.

"No, no, no—" muttered Atsushi as he curled himself up, shaking his head as he slowly rocked back and forth. He can't be back here.

Atsushi hears the cell opening and he curls in on himself even more, trying his best to be as small as possible while he hears the footsteps getting closer and closer and closer.

"Stay away—!" Atsushi shouts at the orphanage headmaster as he looks up at him, slapping the hand that was getting close to him. Tears stream down his cheeks as he glares at the orphanage headmaster, who has not spoken a single word ever since he talked back.

He fears, fears, fears for his life, finding it scarier for the headmaster to not say any word at him than anything the headmaster has done to him. But if he doesn't speak up, he'll forever be trapped in the headmaster's chains.

"I never wanted to see you again–" he croaked, the fear settling in his bones; never leaving no matter how much he wanted it to. "I never wanted to— why am I back here?"

Atsushi doesn't receive any response, and it makes him upset.

"I was free– I had friends, a job, a family. I was happy—" his voice cracks at the end and he swallows the fear crawling at the back of his throat. He tries so hard not to let the tears fall, but it doesn't work. The bone-chilling fear he has for the headmaster is still there, even though he hasn't seen him for a long, long time.

The headmaster, again, doesn't respond. He only stares Atsushi down and it makes him feel so small and helpless.

He feels it in the way in this child's body that trembles at the sight of the headmaster. He feels the chain tightly wrapped around his leg, remembering how long he tried to get rid of it, but it never worked. He feels it in the way his stomach grumbles, remembering the days he never got any food and when he does get some, it never fills his appetite.

"Atsushi," the headmaster spoke again, and the boy flinched, immediately curling back into his safe corner. Neither moves for a minute or so until the headmaster does, facing his body away from Atsushi as he walks back out of the cell. "Stay here."

"What…?" Atsushi whispered, almost sounding in disbelief but he quickly got up and tried to run after the headmaster, not wanting to be stuck in the cell again. "Wait–" he says as he trips over the bowl of water on the floor, spilling it on him and the floor as Atsushi falls to the ground.

He's breathing heavily, suddenly running out of oxygen as he looks up at the headmaster, whose expression never changed nor did he say anything.

"Please, please, please—" pleaded Atsushi as he watched the orphanage headmaster walk away. He never once stopped for a moment to look at Atsushi nor did he say anything.

The orphanage headmaster is out of the room, leaving Atsushi all alone in the cell while covered in the water he spilled.

"They don't care about you."

It echoes in Atsushi's brain once again and his doubts are increasing by the second they don't appear to take him away from this place.

Maybe the headmaster is right—

Maybe they don't care about him.

Maybe it was all in his mind that they care about him.

Maybe, maybe, maybe—

Maybe he never left the orphanage the first place.

[balladeersbell]

bsd prediction: tanizaki transfers to the mafia. the family naomi is a part of is mori’s.

[starlightshadowsworld]

Atsushi being a defiant little shit who makes his opinions clear and will just not do things if he doesn't need too.

He rolls his eyes at Akutugawa's rants. He raises an eyebrow at Dazai's antics and knows the second he's being messed with.

He respects Ranpo's ability but still, help clean up once in a while don't you? He doesn't bat an eye at the shocked looks that gets, because why should he hold his tongue?

Atsushi who calls himself a coward and yet even afraid still stands tall because the Orphanage couldn't break him.

He swore like a sailor and spat the soap out of his mouth. He dug his heels into the ground and glared when the Headmaster tried to drag him by his hair.

He survived attempts that should've killed him. And loudly dragged his chains on the ground just to piss them all off. What were they gonna do that they hadn't done before?

Atsushi who was raised being told the world itself abandoned him.

He never had anyone on his side. And because of that fights every fight dirty because it could he his last. And like hell is he going out in a place like this.

He grits his teeth and stands no matter how tired or in pain he is. Because he's never had the luxury of backing down.

[wistfullywaiting2]

The biggest misconception in the bsd fandom ever to me is people constantly portraying Atsushi as someone who trauma dumps excessively when he canonically barely talks about it at all.

The entire point is that Atsushi does not talk about his trauma he’s just constantly thinking about/reliving it. He can’t escape the memories of his past so he tries not to acknowledge them.

He only mentions it when asked, either directly or when someone asks him to explain himself.

Atsushi doesn’t even give a cohesive explanation for what he saw while under Dogra Magra, he just apologizes to Haruno and Naomi.

If Lucy hadn’t had her whole “you’ve never suffered the way I have” spiel then I doubt even the audience would’ve gotten to find out about his scars

If Akutagawa never asked him how it felt for the orphanage headmaster to die Atsushi would have never told him that he’s been hallucinating.

In the omake where Kyoka asks him why his hair is like that it’s clear he wouldn’t have told her that unless she had asked.

In 55 minutes Atsushi very briefly mentions sleeping on a dirty floor somewhere to Kunikida because he was trying to explain and justify his behavior.

And the thing is that there are scenes that implies that the other characters see Atsushi behaving strangely and are visibly confused because they do not understand what’s wrong with him.

Remember, we as an audience get to see things about characters that the main cast doesn’t. Just because we see into Atsushi’s mind doesn’t mean the other characters know what’s going on in there.

Also little footnote here that I think this is a reference to the moon over the mountain but I digress