#the night shift incorrect quotes

[simple-dark-eyes]

*Mexican!Yuu just chilling in their room, fliming, and pans the camera to Grim; who's very interested as to whatever is happening outside their dorm*

Yuu: ¿Y tu gato es chismoso? Mire mi gato.

Grim:

[incorrect-skylanders-quotes]

(Stink Bomb walks in on Freeze Blade and Night Shift)

Freeze Blade: (holding a first-aid kit) Bro! I was homoerotically cleaning and patching my friend’s wounds and you ruined it! I was scolding him for being an idiot in an exasperated but fond tone of voice while I tenderly bandaged his knuckles and we both tried unsuccessfully to avoid looking into each other’s eyes until the tension between us became unbearable when you entered the room without fucking knocking and totally killed the mood! What the hell, man?!

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

Jade: children should NOT be forced to wake up earlier than 6 am to get to school on time. what if they are working the night shift at freddy fazbear’s??

[seliyareine]

Angelo: You were stabbed. Do you remember anything?

Sebastian: Only the ambulance ride to the hospital.

Angelo: That wasn't an ambulance, I drove you.

Sebastian: But I heard a siren.

Quin: That was Styx.

Styx: Sorry, I got nervous.

[green-eyes-and-orange-ties]

North: Where are you going? Sebastian: To get ice cream or commit a felony, I’ll decide on the way there

[potatothemoose]

Gas station antics

Tobias: *dancing on top of the checkout counter, believing he is completely alone on his night shift* DISTURBIAAAA! DISTURBIAAAAAAAAAA! BUM-BUM-BE-DUM-BUM- Eric: *horrified, watching from outside with the midnight snack Tobias requested* ... why do I get the feeling this is one of those things I was never meant to comprehend?

---------

Eric: Tobias, are we friends? Tobias: That's a stupid fucking question. Eric: *sobbing* Tobias: WAIT WAIT WAIT THAT MEANS WE'RE FRIENDS YOU LOVABLE HALFWIT

--------

Eric: sometimes Tobias doesn't know how to be social, so I have to do it for him. Eric, holding out Tobias' hand to a random person at the park: this is Tobias. He's not very social, but I'm sure he'd be very happy to make friends with you! Tobias, deadpan: oh, so we're playing two truths and a lie now.

--------

Tobias: Eric keeps thinking that every time I've had a bad day, eating fried chicken helps me feel better. Tobias: *looks around before whispering* don't tell anyone, but what he doesn't realize is that it's actually having dinner of any kind with him that makes me happy.

[whatswrongwithblue]

Alastor x Reader

"The Morning After"

This started out as an idea for just a quick funny incorrect quotes and turned into a full-on one shot of fluffy nonesense. G/N reader, though they do wear make-up. No use of Y/N.

Still half asleep, you shifted from laying on your back to your side, facing the edge of the bed. The change in position suddenly made you more awake for two reasons; the pressure on your bladder and the odd green light burning through your eyelids.

You blinked your eyes, squinting for several seconds as your eyes adjusted to the light, and you realized you were looking at the pocket dimension bayou in Alastor’s room.

Alastor’s room.

ALASTOR’S ROOM.

Oh fuck.

You look over at the other side of the bed and see the unmistakable red and black hair, the two long fluffy ears, and little antlers. Markers of his identity that you had grown accustomed to in the years you had known him. What you weren’t used to was the ashen skin of his bare back and the gentle rise and fall of his shoulder as he slept soundly beside you, facing the opposite direction.

He was as naked under the sheets as you were.

Halfway between panicked and giddy with excitement, you recalled the wild night you two had indulged in the night before. The culmination of years of pining on your end – and recently acknowledged and understood feelings on his end – had led you to his bedroom for the very first time last night.

You just hoped it wasn’t something he would wake to regret.

That worry had to come later because right now your poor bladder was going to burst.

Slipping out from under the sheets, you tiptoed as quietly as you could across the floor and into the bathroom, making sure to not turn on the light until the door was softly closed behind you.

Ugghh, you hadn’t even cleaned yourself up before falling asleep. You and Alastor had gone so hot and heavy that once it was over, you both had just passed out, wrapped up in each other’s arms, so exhausted that not even the mess between your legs and the wet spots on the sheets could bother you.

Quickly and quietly, you relieved yourself and then wiped yourself clean, praying to Roo herself that you would get the chance to shower before any more intimate acts were shared between you and Alastor.

And then you flushed the toilet and winced at the insulting and loud noise it made. You forgot the plumbing in this piece of shit building let you know exactly who was showering or taking a piss from two stories above.

Two more things happened simultaneously that got your panic spiking again.

The light in the bedroom flipped on and you caught your reflection in the mirror.

You’re make up was a disaster.

You weren’t so vain as to have never let Alastor see you without it before. Honestly, he’d seen you with a natural and clean face more often than not but of course you had put on a near full face the night before and not cleaned it up before . . . before . . .

Fuck, you probably left lipstick and mascara all over those nice silk sheets he had summoned just before he’d laid you down on them.

There was a soft knock on the door.

“Darling?” Alastor’s voice called for you and he sounded almost insecure and you would think about that later, later, how sweet that little hint of worry in his questioning was and how it meant he was hoping you weren’t regretting anything either and for fuck’s sakes you had patiently waited years to get that man’s dick inside you just for you to forget basic hygiene afterwards and now you had water proof raccoon eyes and lipstick smeared across your face like you were trying out to play the next Joker and what was left of your eyeshadow was in clumps that did nothing but accentuate every little wrinkle around your eyelids . . .

“I’m fine!” you say with a voice that was far too high pitched to be believable and you began searching through the bathroom drawers for a washrag or something to clean up your face. “Just cleaning up a little is all.”

He’d heard the toilet flush, heard the running of the bathroom sink, he had to have heard you rummaging through the drawers, frankly those beautiful ears of his could probably pick up on the sound of your heart racing like fucking Secretariat. And it was Alastor. He had zero sense of personal space and was likely going to barge in any second now-

You heard his soft chuckle as he opened the door and caught you desperately wiping at your face with a washrag and cold water, doing less to remove the makeup and more to just make an even more pathetic mess of colors across your stricken expression.

It didn’t help that you were still completely naked.

“My dearest, there are better ways to go about that.”

Frozen with embarrassment, you watched his reflection in the mirror as he walked behind you, though you wouldn’t meet his eyes. Instead, yours were glued to his equally nude body that he so confidently kept on display for you as he reached around you and opened a drawer, revealing a packet of make-up remover wipes.

He held one up for you and that’s when you finally looked up at him.

His ever-present smile was there, a touch sweeter and affectionate than usual, but the rest of his face looked as bad as yours. Red eyeshadow and black eyeliner had gotten everywhere and with the rather attractive sex hair he had going on, he looked more like a member of an 80’s rock band than he did The Radio Demon.

You couldn’t help the relieved laugh that escaped your lips.

“What, you thought all this was natural? Please,” he gave a dismissive wave of his hand and wrist and began cleaning up his own face.

The tension and nervousness melted away as you followed his lead and after getting yesterday’s make-up properly cleaned up, Alastor even summoned your toothbrush from your room for you to use. And none of it was awkward or weird, doing these normal, domestic things . . . in his bathroom . . . in the nude . . . with him there.

It should have been weird but instead it was unremarkably comfortable. Like it had been this way all along. A normal, mundane morning, in the best way possible.

“Join me for a shower?” he asked, with his hand held out.

There was a plethora of other questions left unsaid in his gaze.

Did you really not regret the night before?

Did you really want him? With all his violent inclinations and strange, often conflicting mannerisms and behaviors?

Were you really ready to commit yourself to the unpredictable life of The Radio Demon?

Offering him your best smile and your hand, you followed him into the steamiest, most invigorating shower of your life.

[luxthestrange]

LMK Incorrect quotes#111 Caught red-handed-

How PIF found out you and Nezha...were a thing...

PIF*Barged into your room and saw it all*... Were you two kissing?

Nezha: NO!

DB!Y/n: No, we were sloppily making out

Nezha, flustered: Y/NNN!!!

PIF*pointing at Nezha's neck with a grin* Hickies too? C’mon, you know you have a night shift to cover...

Nezha*trying in vain to cover his neck* PIF!!!

DB!Y/n: Oh come on PIF, nothing some makeup can’t fix...you be surprised what he has gotten to cover-

Nezha*has gone three shades redder at this point and covers his face*BOTH OF YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP-

PIF*Looks between the two* I call dibs on naming your firstborn ~

Nezha*Is already dying inside covering his face further into his hands*

Part 9 of:

[angelwings-crossbowstrings]

Y/N, patrolling with Daryl: Ugh, it’s so hot out here that my vagoogle is sweating!

Daryl, both stunned and confused: Your what?!

Y/N, utterly nonplussed: My vagoogle.

Daryl: Ain’t that somethin’ to do with the internet?

Y/N: No. My vagoogle. My vaheena. My cave of wonders. My pink canoe. My hoo hoo. My tunnel of love.

Daryl, shifting between confused, exasperated, and disgusted: Th’fuck?

Y/N, sighing: My vagina, Daryl.

Daryl: Can’t ya just call it a pussy instead’a…all that shit?

Y/N: No, because my vajayjay is made of gold.

Daryl, walking away: Right.

Y/N, smirking: I could’ve called it my cock-a-doodle-doer last night and you would’ve kept on eating it like it was KFC.

Daryl, blushing furiously: Stop.

Y/N, skipping to catch up: Finger lickin’ good!

Daryl, stares before nodding: Can’t argue with that but please stop talkin’ now.

@loganlostitall and I should not be allowed to discuss incorrect quotes at 3am. Poor Daryl.

[papajscupcake]

MY SWEET NOTHING

MY SWEET NOTHING | SOFT!RAFECAMERON X FEM!READER | IMAGINE

PAIRING: Sofe!Rafecameron X Fem!Reader

SUMMARY: Just a night of cuddles, games and sweet nothings

WORD COUNT: 467

WARNING(S): None just a whole lot of Fluff also I have 15 drafts with pretty much done I just need to rewrite them but there should be more imagines and Incorrect quotes coming soon :) anywho enjoy Soft Rafe

It was around 9:45 at night, the stars were shining in the sky twinkling down onto the OBX while the sun was already set making the sky hues of navy blues and dark purples whilst the suns edges peaked slightly over the waves of the gently splashing water of the marsh,

The couple laid in the king sized bed in the Cameron’s mansion, it was the first time in a week or so that the couple finally had time together since Rafe had been helping his father with the family business and the girl had been working alongside her best friend Kiara in their restaurant Kiara inherited from her father.

His girlfriend was rested between his open legs, her arms were securely wrapped around his left leg hugging into the muscly soft flesh of his thigh, her eyes were closed but not sleeping her face was pushed into pelvis rested just underneath his toned abs while her legs were curled as much as possible to her stomach grazing Rafe’s right leg.

His arms were rested comfortably on the top of her shoulder blades slightly leaning on the back of her head, he held his controller for the PS5 playing his slightly intense game of pro clubs

they have been in this position for about half an hour now just doing their own thing however it wasn’t enough for the girl

“Rafe” the girl called lifting her head up to look at Rafe in her lying down position

“Yeah princess?” Rafe asked continuing to focus on the game he was playing

“Nothing”She whispered once again digging her face into his abs Rafe glances away from his game to look down at the girl with a confused expression with his eyebrows raised

“Come on what is it princess?”he pressed pausing his game and resting the controller beside him on the bed to give the girl his full attention,

this made the girl shift her position to be lying on her back and looking up at the boy, Rafe with his now empty hands puts one on her jaw gently stroking her skin

“I just wanted to say your name” she said smiling shyly at the boy with her cheeks flushed a bright red, she turned on her side again closing her eyes, Rafe picks up his controller and begins to play the game again

a couple minutes later

“Princess”The boy said not looking away from his game

“yeah?” She asked opening her eyes staring at the wall ahead of her

“Nothing” he looked down at her to watch the smile he loved move then anything to appear on her face

the girl responded by digging her face into his bare stomach and giving it tender kisses making Rafe smile at the love of his life.

If you have any requests you want me to do either dm me or comment :)

[snowydoesitall]

✨movie night with the hidden inventory gc✨

*:･ﾟ✧cast: gojo, geto, shoko, utahime, nanami, and haibara

✧summary: a one shot of the hidden inventory friend group’s movie night

♡a/n: i’m back!!! guys please appreciate my efforts with this one this took me several attempts to post and way longer than usual to write

ྀིwarnings: language; gojo and geto are their own warnings atp; no beta we die like suguru’s tea mug

after the discussion regarding which movie they were planning to watch that night had ended, you wrapped up whatever homework you had left before changing into more comfortable clothes and heading to shoko’s dorm a bit early to help her set up.

upon arriving, you find that utahime had the same idea as she was currently standing by the microwave waiting for a bag of popcorn to finish cooking.

shoko was at her laptop, looking perplexed, so you walked over to her to see if she needed help.

“i’ve been trying to get into our disney+ account so i can stream cars onto the tv, but it keeps saying that the password is incorrect”, she explains. “did gojo change the password again?”

“i don’t think so…did you put the question mark at the end?”

shoko paused for a moment before typing something into the password bar. sure enough, the app finally let her in.

she stared at her laptop in disbelief for a solid minute before responding.

“huh, that seemed to do it. thanks.”

you nodded, chuckling lightly, before walking over to utahime, who was microwaving what appeared to be the fifth bag of popcorn.

“damn, do we really need that much popcorn?”, you asked.

“if it were just us girls i would’ve stopped at three or four. but there’s going to be seven of us, and you know how gojo is with snacks”, she responded.

“good point.”

the two of you continued to chat for a bit, shoko joining in once she finished setting up the movie.

eventually, the boys finally showed up with a couple snacks as well as a few bottles of soda, which they set on the counter.

“alright, that’s everyone. shall we start the movie?”, shoko asked.

everyone agreed, grabbing a couple snacks and drinks before settling themselves on either the couch or the floor in front of the tv as shoko presses play on the remote to behind the movie.

as the movie played on, the room was filled with all sorts of chaos. for starters, gojo would not stop quoting lines from the movie, which, while slightly annoying, was tolerable. eventually haibara joined in for a bit, seeing as he’d watched that movie at least a hundred times.

it eventually got tiring though, especially once gojo started quoting lines from completely different movies, and so geto ended up lightly tapping him on the shoulder to get him to stop.

speaking of those two, once gojo’s focus had shifted to his boyfriend, the two of them were practically glued to each other with how close they were. this didn’t exactly surprise you, since gojo is the king of being clingy, especially around geto, and the latter of the two never minded it despite not being super clingy himself.

“alright, you two need to either get a room or stop making out on my floor, because some of us are trying to watch the god damn movie”, shoko complained after about ten minutes of their behavior.

“i mean i’m not opposed to- ow!”

whatever gojo was planning to say next was cut off by you smacking him from the couch.

“making out during a disney movie is crazy, you two”, you stated.

“fair point”, geto responded, lightly shoving gojo off his lap, to the latter’s dismay.

nonetheless, the two of them settled down after a while, so your attention shifted back to the movie.

about halfway through, you started feeling tired, which made sense seeing as it was getting kind of late and you’d had a pretty long day. all the same, you did your best to stay awake, as things in the movie were starting to get real interesting.

you reached into one of the popcorn bowls to grab a few pieces to keep yourself awake. in doing so, your hand brushed against another hand, causing you to pause.

you glanced at nanami, who had reached into the popcorn bowl at the same time you did. the two of you sat there for a moment, neither one lifting your hands from the bowl.

after what seemed like a couple minutes, you finally lifted your hand out of the bowl, a few pieces in your hand.

“looks like we had the same idea”, you remarked with a laugh, popping a piece of popcorn into your mouth.

“looks like it”, nanami responded, a small smile forming on his face as he too grabbed a few pieces of popcorn.

you heard a cough, so you turned to see utahime staring at the two of you, a knowing smile on her face. you stared back at her, hinting for her to back off.

eventually, towards the end of the movie, you were getting more and more tired, to the point where even popcorn wasn’t enough to keep you awake. the last thing you remember before dozing off was the start of the final race.

you woke up slowly to someone gently shaking you awake.

“hey guys, time to wake up, movie just ended”, haibara stated.

you took a glimpse of your surroundings, noticing that the nearly-empty bowl of popcorn had now toppled onto the floor, spilling a few kernels. you then noticed that you’d fallen asleep leaning against nanami, who in turn had fallen asleep against the armrest of the couch.

haibara was standing in front of the two of you, currently trying to wake up nanami, who was still sound asleep against the armrest. you sat up quickly, hoping that he hadn’t noticed you dozing off on him, but you figured he must’ve since the second you got up was when he finally woke up, slightly dazed and tense as he glanced around the room, presumably to find where you’d gone.

once he noticed you sitting next to him, he let out a sigh of relief, looking more relaxed.

“you okay, man?”, haibara asked, looking slightly confused.

nanami turned to face the brown-haired boy, looking as if he’d just noticed his presence.

“oh, sorry…i’m fine, just…it’s nothing.”

you and haibara looked at him suspiciously, feeling that it wasn’t just “nothing”, but didn’t pry.

“i’m fine, you two. seriously.”

you opened your mouth to say something, but before you could, you heard shoko calling for the three of you.

“hey! are you two sleepyhead lovers and hai going to help me clean up or what?”

“the WHAT?”, you exclaimed, looking at shoko with an mixed expression of shock and confusion all at once. meanwhile, haibara was looking like he was trying not to laugh while nanami was awkwardly looking around the room, trying to avoid eye contact, a twinge of pink starting to show on his face.

“nothing! don’t worry about it, now come help us clean up!”

you signed, knowing you weren’t going to get a legitimate answer from her, at least not right now, so you got up from the couch and started cleaning up, the other two boys following suit.

but as you were clearing up the kitchen, you couldn’t help but think about what shoko said.

lovers?, you thought to yourself. but how could that be? we’re just friends, after all…

but then you started to look more into it, moments of the night playing through your mind. the small smile he gave you when your hand brushed against his earlier, the way neither of you pulled away immediately, his slight blush at shoko’s jab at the two of you, the way he rose up from his sleep the second he no longer felt your presence, all of it.

the more and more you thought about it, the more and more you realized that perhaps the other girls had a point.

“you okay?”

you snapped back into reality as you turned to face nanami, who was looking at you with concern.

“yeah, i’m fine, just…tired”, you tell him, giving him a reassuring smile.

you weren’t entirely sure if nanami believed you, but he didn’t show it if he didn’t.

“i see. anyway, the others are planning to crash here for the night. the cleaning’s pretty much done if you wanted to head to bed.”

sleep did sound pretty nice right then and there, so you nodded.

“yeah, that might be a good idea, it is pretty late…”

the two of you headed back to the living room space. nanami returned to his spot on shoko’s couch, leaning against the armrest, while you sat next to him and tried to fall asleep sitting upwards, not wanting to invade his personal space nor accidentally wake up haibara, who had taken up the other side of the couch.

“there’s no way that’s comfortable”, nanami remarked as he noticed your attempts.

“sorry, didn’t want to intrude or anything”, you replied.

“i didn’t mind the first time, why would i mind now?”, he asked. “make yourself comfortable. i promise i don’t mind.”

with that, you hesitantly went back to leaning against nanami, finding him a lot more comfortable than trying to sleep sitting up.

before long, you were finally starting to fall asleep. you felt an arm gently wrap itself around you, and while you certainly didn’t expect it, you didn’t try to pull away, nor did you feel uncomfortable. instead, you felt at ease, like this was natural, almost.

by the time sleep came to take you away for the night, you were pretty certain that nanami had some sort of feelings for you.

hell, at this point, you were starting to think that you did, too.

oh god this ended up longer than i expected😭

♫tag list: @ofcqdesi @duwangdays

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[incorrect-skylanders-quotes]

Random Villain: We have your granddaughter.

Night Shift: I do not have a granddaughter-

Random Villain: Then who's the vampire trying to convince us to like bats?

Night Shift: By the Ancients, you have Bat Spin…

[what-we-do-in-santa-carla]

The Lost Boys Incorrect Quotes

Star: This B needs a C in her A.

Michael: Oh, my God.

Star: ...This babe needs a coconut in her arms.

Michael: Oh! I thought you were saying this b*tch needs a C*ck in her *ss.

Star: OH MY GOD?

-

(Marko is teasing Laddie)

Paul, snatching him away: Hey, don't you dare touch Paul Junior.

Marko: (gasps)

Paul: That's right. It's your baby!

Marko, with fake outrage: Are you sayin' I knocked you up?

Laddie, just happy that his brothers are paying attention to him: 😇

-

Dwayne, holding Laddie: I'm sort of a natural mother.

Marko, very high: Yeah- natural mother-fucker!!

Dwayne: 😐

-

Star: Quick, you're losing a lot of blood! What's your type?

Michael: Men or women?

Star: Your blood type, Michael.

Michael: Oh! Red.

-

(David, after following Star down a dark alley.)

David: I'm not a rapist; I'm just a vampire.

Star: Okay, then name one vampire rule.

David: Suck blood?

Star: That's on me. I set the bar too low.

-

Marko: Please, whatever your new idea is, I just don't wanna get staked again.

Michael: Ugh, Marko, you got revived suck it up.

Marko: Isn't this supposed to be an apology?

Michael: You're right.

Michael, turning to Sam: You know, I impaled my boyfriend on some antlers two years ago and it comes up way less than this.

Sam: WAY less.

-

Paul: Star is just upset because the historically entrenched patriarchy has created a culture of victim-shaming that suppresses any power shift in our masculo-phallic system.

Star: Huh?

Paul: I got bored last night so I watched a documentary in the video store about feminism.

Star: You're my best friend.

[seliyareine]

Sebastian: .. .----. -- / ... --- .-. .-. -.-- [translation: I’M SORRY]

Angelo : What's that?

Sebastian: Remorse code.

Angelo : I'm even angrier now.

[green-eyes-and-orange-ties]

Angelo: Whats your prefered study method?

Sebastian: Coffee and tears

Angelo: You're a disaster! ... I can fix you

[azrisweek]

Azris Week 2024 Prompts & Rules

We are delighted to announce the prompts for Azris Week 2024! Each prompt is accompanied by a few suggestions to help spark creativity. Don't feel obligated to follow the suggestions. We intentionally kept the prompts very open to interpretation this year and can't wait to see where the inspiration leads.

Day 1: Contrasts

The chilled darkness of the night, the warming glow of a fire's light. One spends his life pulling strings behind the curtain, and the other is center stage dancing to several tunes beyond his own. Born to privilege, born to poverty. One's family found, the other's fractured. "Contrasts" is a broad theme, how will you explore it?

Day 2: Familiars

Take it to mean the noun—hounds, shadows, horses, other pets, maybe sentient little flames, companions, friends, family, etc—or expand your interpretation to the adjective and see where it takes you.

Day 3: Contact

How do the heir of Autumn and the Shadowsinger communicate? Through letters or texts, maybe, or through heavy gazes and the brush of fingers on exposed skin. Have they always spoken with each other this way?

Day 4: Free Day

This is self-explanatory.

Day 5: Slice of Life

So much of this enemies-to-lovers ship is full of strife, pain, and betrayal. But what about the quiet moments? Whether in the midst of chaos or with lower stakes, how have they learned to love each other?

Day 6: Changes

What changes? What remains the same? Change for the individual, change for the pair. Think of shifting opinions, a changing world, personal growth, and developing relationships. One of the reasons we ship Azris is our love for their dynamic. How dynamic can they be?

Day 7: Solstice & Equinox

Autumn Equinox, the shift in seasons from light to darkness, a time of harvest and plenty. Winter Solstice, the longest night, the turning point. One can predict that the Autumn Equinox in the Autumn Court is as grand of a celebration as the Winter Solstice in Night. We're closing out the week with a hearty dose of holiday spirit.

1) Be respectful. We're here to celebrate Azris and appreciate the creations made in their honor. This is a positive, inclusive space which won't stand for bashing of any kind.

2) Please direct any event-related questions to this account, not to the mods individually.

3) Tag us and use #azrisweek2024 when posting here or on Instagram so that we can reblog/repost. If you are posting a work to AO3 add it to the event collection here.

4) Creations of all kinds are welcome and encouraged! Fics, fanart, mood boards, headcanons, incorrect quotes, edits, playlists, etc. We will not be promoting AI generated/altered images or fanworks.

5) A caveat to the previous rule. This event won't tolerate characters being warped to fit heteronormative roles and/or relationship stereotypes. For example (thanks to @cauldronblssd for putting it so clearly,) fem Eris or Azriel as queer identities or gender non-conforming characters, yes—fem Eris or Azriel as a substitute for a straight woman, no. With this in mind, we reserve the right to use our discretion and not engage with content, regardless of how it is tagged, if said content perpetuates harmful stereotypes.