#the neck kisses oH my god KILL MEEEE

[mushiewrites]

OH MY FUCKING GODHSKSHSJSSBHS SUMMER 😵‍💫

Sap’s Cuffs (Sapnap x Quackity x KarlJacobs)

Word Count: 2272

This one takes place in the DSMP Minecraft world where the three are engaged and very very happy together. (Hmph!)

Warning: Very intense tickling and use of restraints.

     “So, I wanted to propose an idea for tonight.", Sapnap grinned as innocently as he could at his fiancés. They were all sat down for a dinner of mushroom soup and carrots. The other two stayed quiet and gave him room to talk. He only squirmed nervously in his seat.

"Yeah Sap?", Karl encouraged softly and then gave a little side eye to Quackity.

"What's got you so nervous?".

Sapnap took a breath and explained how he was hoping tonight he could handcuff the two together and then tickle them. Karl flushed and Quackity shook his head quickly, both men with wide eyes at the idea.

"You have been such a menace with the tickles lately! We didn't even fight back last time!", Quackity argued lightly. There was no heat in his words, though. Karl couldn’t help but giggle. An excited nervous energy crept into all of them like it always did when a new idea for something like this was suggested. This one being so tickle-focused added an extra shiver down everybody’s spines. Sapnap laughed.

"Well, it's just we got those handcuffs and we haven't really been putting them to use! I've been thinking about this a lot.".

Quackity and Karl whispered back and forth while Sapnap waited, sipping his soup slowly. They really had fun with it. Gasping dramatically and shaking their heads wildly while looking Sapnap up and down. He squirmed under their gazes.

"Guys!", he huffed, finally. They laughed.

So, they made a plan. Sapnap absolutely had to go first. Tonight would be dedicated to Quackity and Karl's ticklish revenge.

~•~

     As they got Sapnap in just his basketball shorts with his hands cuffed behind him on his knees on the bed, they told him about all the times just this month he had tickled them with no mercy. Somehow, it was the worst teasing he had ever experienced. He had been so hard on them recently...he was screwed.

"The other week when we were all getting cozy on the couch and kissing and you derailed everything by tickling me, and then you guys tortured me forever! You got my wings and my back, too!". Quackity shook his head while he brushed the sock fuzz off of Sapnap's bare feet. Sapnap shivered.

"The other day when we were cuddling waiting for Quackity to come home and you decided to instead pass the time by counting my ribs against my will! Poor ducky came home to screaming!", Karl said as he tested the tightness of Sapnap's cuffs. He wanted him contained, but comfortable. They went on and on going through each and every instance of Sapnap tickling them, right up until last night where he had promised them massages and instead tortured both of their worst spots. Sapnap had never felt butterflies like this before.

     Quackity adjusted their bedroom lights to his preferred slightly-darker setting while Karl guided Sapnap onto his back with his cuffed hands in the softest pillow they had. He nervously chewed his lip while he stared at the ceiling. He was trying his best to not think about what it was going to be like to have the tickles start while he laid defenseless…and he was failing. Karl caught his gaze and kissed his warm cheek.

"Remember your safeword?", he whispered. Sapnap giggled and rolled his eyes.

"Blaze.". Karl nodded and kissed Sapnap’s lips, both of them melting into the feeling for a moment. They both smiled at the slow and gentle affection. Sapnap squirmed as Karl pulled away after a few seconds. "I love you guys.", he whispered.

"We love you too, Sap-master.", he said softly and then smooched a bunch of loud tickly kisses into the side of his neck, quickly drawing frantic giggles from him. As if on cue, a giggly Quackity leaped onto the bed and startled them both.

"Who's ready for tickle tortureeee!!!", he yelled. Sapnap writhed in place as the giggles kept pouring out. The two grinned at each other knowingly.

"Yes!".

"Let's go!!".

"We gave him the giggles!!!". The two cheered as Sapnap laughed now.

"You guys…are idiots!".

                                          ~•~

     This wasn't the first time Sapnap had been restrained with the handcuffs, but it is the first time he had ever been tickled with the restraint. He had been pinned pretty well before, but the feeling the handcuffs left him with was surprising. He couldn't break out of handcuffs. He couldn't trick the handcuffs into letting go of him. The first round of real tickling was shocking.

     The two had started on his sensitive legs and really focused in on them. Each were sat on their knees at either side of his mostly-bare legs. He was already giggling from the teasing and anticipation. He didn't always get like this, but this entire scenario had him reeling.

Quackity latched onto his bare thigh with zero warning and started squeezing roughly, Sapnap wheezed before falling back into laughter.

"Quackity!!!", he wailed. Karl giggled and let his touch be slightly softer, grabbing up and down the meatiest part of Sapnap's other thigh. The legs jumped and twitched under the awful touch and Sapnap was already beside himself with laughter. It hit him just how helpless he was. He screamed for mercy.

"Oh please! We know you can handle more than that!", Quackity laughed.

"It's so bad!!! Move! Please!!".

"No. I want to tickle riiiight here.", Karl teased. He leaned down and nibbled on the ticklish skin and Sapnap squealed.

"Ugh, love that noise.", Quackity said as he moved down and teased at his kneecaps. Sapnap was twisting and jerking against the bed helplessly as the desperate laughter poured out of him. Hiccups punched through each new round of laughs and the other two praised him for being so cute. Which only made things worse.

"What? Where do you want us to move to?".

"Anywhere!", Sapnap whined.

"Anywhere?".

"Nonono-", Sapnap backtracked quickly at Karl’s dangerous tone. They started to flip him over. Despite his protests, he could only let them. Quackity giggled and adjusted the pillow so Sapnap wasn't suffocating.

"I have a bad feeling about...NO DON'T!!!".

Quackity looked back to see Karl holding one of Sapnap's ankles in a headlock.

"Oooh!", he trilled as he followed his lead and scooped up the other ankle.

"Guys, come on!!!", Sapnap wiggled pathetically, his cuffed hands grabbing at the air behind his back. The butterflies were taking over again. His feet were his worst spot.

Within a few seconds Sapnap was twisting and writhing against the bed as he screamed with laughter. No pleas could compete with the laughter that tore out of him. His mind fuzzed as he completely lost control.

His feet were bad.

They were so bad.

He was going to die.

But, he still couldn't beg for it to end. A few embarrassing snorts slipped out as Karl skittered his colorful nails against his heel. The tickle monsters giggled in delight.

"Lil piggy?".

"Little piggy!!!", Karl gasped as he made a fun connection in his mind. Sapnap wailed dramatically before slipping into a stunted silence, his whole body shuddering before the laughter barked its way out again. "This little piggy went to the market...", Karl teased. Sapnap squeezed his eyes shut as tears started to flow down his hot cheeks.

Karl wiggled each toe playfully while Quackity scribbled his nails into the other sole, them both singing the childish song together. A deadly tease. Sapnap doesn't think he had ever felt like this before. Well...he can't think. The sheet beneath his face was soaked with his tears. His body moved without his permission, the ticklish sensation driving every single jerk and squirm. His laughter surprised him. It had never been like this, so laced with wheezes and snorts that only seemed to encourage his fiancés.

"Wee wee wee!!! All the way home!!!", the two sang. Sapnap felt their hands crawl quickly up his legs and tickle together into the back of his thighs mercilessly. Sapnap could only squeal like a pig himself.

But, he seemed to have earned himself a small break. He whimpered through his gasps for air as the two whispered between each other somewhere behind him. His mind was barely working, but he caught words like 'really' and 'tickle' and 'safeword'. He barely processed any of it. His toes were still scrunching to try and get rid of the ghost tickles that remained. He felt a firm hand close over both sets of toes to help and he sighed in relief.

He squeaked as he suddenly felt Karl's sweet tickly kisses cross the back of his neck.

"Nooo!", he whined softly as he squirmed. Quackity coo'ed and ruffled Sapnap's hair.

"You're so cute oh my god.".

Sapnap scrunched and broke down into squeaky hysterical giggles as the two expertly placed the most ticklish of kisses along his shoulders, neck, and ears. They must have done a bit of strategizing before this. This was a move Quackity and Sapnap used on Karl all the time and he suddenly wanted to give him a million apologies because he could hardly breathe being suffocated by so much affection and tickles at once. He wouldn't survive, he was sure.

One of Quackity's kisses found Sapnap's wet cheek.

"We make you cry?", Quackity kissed Sapnap's ear as he nodded. "Cuuuute.", he whispered into it, dragging some adorable whining out of him. "Tears of joy, I presume.", Quackity broke out the fake high pitched British accent as he diverted for the playful route. Sapnap squealed at a well placed smooch to his jaw and the two joined in on the giggles.

"This was really such a great idea Sapnap.", Karl spoke up. He wasn't sure if the squirmy man could hear him, but he didn't mind. He smiled down at his fingers as they jabbed and poked along the ribs that were exposed perfectly for him with Sapnap's facedown position. Sapnap's sharp gasp-y laughter was beautiful. Quackity made a small contented hum as he mirrored Karl's rib tickles on the other side. Sapnap cried out and pattered his feet into the bed as he grew more and more hysterical.

"Pleaseee!!!".

"Please more?", the two didn't miss a beat and teased him in sync before laughing.

"Shut up!!!". Sapnap whined before clenching his cuffed fists and shaking violently as they prodded into a particularly sensitive pair of ribs. His laughter rose a few octaves and he twisted back and forth. The merciless rib tickling was only made worse with every twist and Sapnap only drove himself more crazy.

"His little hands are so cute when they do that!".

~•~

They had failed to set any kind of timer for this event and if you asked, none of them would be sure how long they tickled Sapnap for. They all indulged in the different emotions it pried out of each of them. Sapnap had no thoughts, just ‘that tickles!’. He trusted his fiancées, and they knew his spots and reactions well. They helped each other and took him apart as a team. Expert finger placements and shocking kisses, teases that flustered him beyond anything he was prepared for. Quackity finding ways to be funny and charming even while literaly torturing him. Karl being so so mean, but still somehow adorable and innocent. Sapnap’s laughter was one of the most amazing things to them both. His blush was adorable. His reactions and begs kept them chasing for more. While they’ve had him pretty helpless before, this was the most he had ever been at their mercy. And, they didn’t give much.

~•~

Sapnap found himself on his back. The two were at either side of him and smiling.

"Ready for the big finale?". Sapnap shook his head no, giggly and breathless.

"Oh...you want us to keep going? Forever?", Karl teased.

"No!!". Everyone laughed.

"It's going to be one minute. 60 seconds. Are you ready?".

"I'm ready.", he said. His voice small.

He was not actually ready, for the record.

The minute was a blur as the two put everything they had into tickling Sapnap silly. Quackity's soft golden feathers between his toes. Nibbles across his ribcage. Fingers wiggling into his armpits. Raspberries on his tummy and sides. Smooches all over. All Sapnap could do was give in to the laughter. It took him and threatened to never bring him back. His cheeks reddened and might never calm down. The nerves that were vibrating underneath his skin were screaming at every touch.

In an instant, it was over.

As Sapnap laid limp against the bed, his fiancé’s firm hands tried to soothe him a bit. Carefully working away any ghost tickles that kept the man squirming. Quackity unlocked the cuffs and rubbed Sapnap's wrists.

     He had survived.

     The cuddle session after all that was unmatched. The warmth and love. The trust. The playfulness. Sapnap was like a space heater between them.

“You did so good. Did you have fun Sappy?”, Quackity nuzzled his nose into the hair above Sapnap’s ear as he whispered. His blush rushed back as the giggles started again, shoving his face in Quackity’s neck to hide it.

“Awww!”, the two coo’ed. They cuddled in real close and gave Sapnap little praises as Karl played with his hair. It took a few minutes, but eventually Sapnap’s pulse slowed down and he found himself able to relax.

“I love you guys.”, Sapnap mumbled happily before slowly going limp against Quackity, finally succumbing to the sleepiness. The other two nearly melted at how adorable their blaze-hybrid was.

All three slept cozily wrapped together. Only dreams of tickles and love.

(Art by @kazenomegaminowanpisu )

[the-record]

omggg your lyric fics are killing meeee !!! your so talented <3 you should defo consider doing graceland too by phoebe bridgers (the ultimate sad yet peaceful lesbian lullaby that haunts my dreams)

graceland too

i didnt know if you wanted this with abby BUT if you wanted it with a different character i would be happy to make a new one :)

i love abs shes so ! this is not proofread!!

i do not use description for reader and the photos do not describe the reader !!

my masterlist

no longer a danger to herself or others she made up her mind and laced up her shoes

“go. just take him.”

light poured in through the curtains, just barely illuminating the room in the early morning. abby slept soundly on your chest, her head rising and falling with your body. you couldnt help but admire her.

she’d been through too much, but she was still perfect to you.

pretty brown lashes that fluttered every so often. soft lips you wanted to admire forever. her hair was starting to grow out and you made a mental note to trim it later so it would grow out evenly.

yelled down the hall but nobody answered so she walked outside without an excuse

her eyes fluttered open slowly, gradually adjusting to the light. you smiled, leaning down to press a kiss to her temple.

her eyes fluttered open slowly, gradually adjusting to the light. you smiled, leaning down to press a kiss to her temple.

“good morning sleepyhead,” you teased as she pulled you tighter. “you sleep okay?” she hummed as she nodded against you. “want some breakfast my love?”

“mmm, not yet.” she nosed her face into your neck.

“whatever you want.”

you ran your hand down her back, nails gently scratching as you went. she sighed and pressed a kiss to your collarbone.

she could do anything she wants to she could do whatever she wants to do she could go home, but she’s not going to...

“i could just lay here forever. how are you so comfortable?” you laughed, shaking abby’s head. “are you laughing at me?” she looked up at you, shocked, as you tried to hide the giggles. “oh my god, you are totally laughing at me! i’ll give you something to laugh about.”

you yelled out just as she gets her fingers in your sides, tickling you. “fuck off! abby stop, shit!” you laughed and tried to push her off, but to no avail. “abby please! im sorry!”

she let up, pulling you to her. “i know, i know.” she smiled, she couldn’t help it. “i love you, you know.”

“i know.” you nodded, leaning on her chest to look up at her. “im so proud of you. you’ve been through so much and look at you.”

so we spent what was left of our serotonin to chew on our cheeks and stare at the moon

“all i did was survive. same as you.”

but you shook your head, sitting up to have this conversation.

“no, not you. manny, owen, mel... your dad. you’ve just, you’ve lost so much.” your hand cupped her cheek and abby gently gripped your wrist. “and then when ellie found you,” you took a breath. “fuck, i thought you died abby. you and lev, i thought you were dead. everyone else was and i couldn’t get you out of my head.” she followed the tear that tracked down your face.

“and then i stumbled across you and lev, and i just couldn’t believe it. i couldn’t believe you were alive.” you sniffed, throwing a smile her way. “and you didn’t even take a second to worry about yourself when we got here, just wanting to take care of lev and i.” you thumb rubbed her cheek gently.

said she knows she lived through it to get to this moment ate a sleeve of saltines on my floor and i knew

“can i be honest?” you nodded, scooting closer to her. “i didnt think i was gonna make it. and, i dont think i cared if i died...” tears filled her eyes but she kept going. “and then, ellie was there. she helped me down, and i saw lev, and i knew i had to get out of there. i had to see you again.

“so i fought ellie, and i didnt give up. i had to help lev, and i had to know you were okay.” she smiled and leaned her forehead against yours. “and it was the one decision i don’t regret. im glad i made it out and back to you.”

she pressed a gentle kiss on your lips and pulled you close to her.

“glad to know you care about me.”

“oh my god lev, go fuck off!”

i would do anything you want me to i would do anything for you i would do anything, i would do anything whatever you want me to do, i will do

[shaunamilfman]

bro i cant stop thinking about how much of a hopeless romantic shauna would be 😩 in the beginning of your relationship she's still a bit shy. like her being too shy to initiate a kiss so she's just staring at you with those big eyes and blushing, waiting for you to kiss her.

she would totally make you a mixtape of songs that remind her of you and leave you love notes UGHH.

thinking of her being shy to ask you for sex in the beginning too and just subtly grinding on ur thigh when u guys make out

-🧸

hopeless romantic shauna my beloved.

ugh her ass would be too shy to kiss you unless it was during an argument or something. you'd keep catching her staring at your lips from the corner of your eye and she'd quickly look away when ever you caught her until you finally just kissed her yourself. thinking about cupping her chin with one hand and running your thumb across her bottom lip. i think she might actually die from blushing too hard omg.

it's funny the mixtape thing is actually like my very first or second shauna HC i ever posted. im glad we all agree that her ass is leaving you tapes everywhere. modern au shauna has like spotify playlists she makes for each like milestone of your relationship. she texts you a playlist like and it's like 'For Y/N- Vol. 28'. she so leaves you little notes everywhere i feel like she isn't all that good at expressing herself verbally so she writes it down.

there's something about embarrassed girls... thinking about high libido shauna getting too embarrassed to tell you how easily she gets turned on and just trying to very subtly get herself off while your making out?? she's so gentle as she's rocking herself against your thigh teasing herself more than anything but it only makes her more turned on. thinking about knowing she's doing it but just letting her think she's getting away with it because of how hot it is. thinking about attaching yourself to her neck while she bites her lip bloody trying to stop herself from moaning as she grinds against you ever so slightly. purposely shifting your thigh against her and she just makes this whiny gasping noise and you're like "oh my god shauna. did i hurt you?? 🤭". breaking your silence by calling her desperate one day?? guiding her hips??? anon you're killing meeee.

[harryfeatgaga]

Can we talk about Harry accidentally catching you ~dj ing~…..maybe one night he’s out at the studio and he’s been staying late most nights so you don’t expect him to be home soon. And you’ve been feeling a little extra needy because for the past week or so when he does get home he’s always exhausted so you don’t wanna bother him for anything. But anyways you’re in the bed getting yourself all situated touching yourself a bit then bringing out the vibrator, getting sooooo into it that you didn’t even hear the front door close or hear the footsteps up the stairs😮‍💨 your eyes are closed and you’re about to cum until you hear Harry clear his throat leaning against the door to get your attention🤧 you immediately shut off the vibrator and throw the blanket over you and say “shit Harry you scared me” and he walks over and sits at the edge of the bed facing you. He says “don’t stop on my account😌” and you say “you weren’t supposed to be home….” And he’s like “Well I am so keep going. I saw your face I know you were about to finish, so finish. Make yourself cum and tell me what you were thinking about” 🥵 you don’t comply yet and still with the blanket over you you say “I was thinking about you Harry, I always do” and he’s immediately crawling up to you practically straddling your hips and kissing your neck saying “why didn’t you tell me to come home baby? I would’ve taken care of you. I’ll always take care of you…” and by now he’s pulling the blanket down and turning the vibrator back on and putting it back in your hands and says “….but I want you to take care of yourself first” and he sits back again to let you finally finish while moaning his name, while he palms himself through his pants🥵🥵🥵

OH.......MY GODDDDLFKMNHGUJIK!??!?!?!?!?!?!? WHAT THE FUUUUUCKKKKKVJNHFJIKRJFNHJIK YOU KNOWWWW HOW MUCH THESE CONCEPTS KILL MEEEE IDEK HWYEDHFUJ OH MY GOD THAT IS SO SOME SHIT HE WOULD SAY TOO WHAT THE FUCKKKFCJNV IM SOOO!??!?!?!??! 😵‍💫🫠🥵

[lovinkiri]

She's So Toxic

Mina Ashido x Reader

Description: Mina is a player. She's toxic. So toxic that she takes phone calls from other girls right in front of you. Doesn't mean she won't keep you entertained.

Author's Thoughts: Okay so the thought of Toxic!Mina is killing meeee

Warning: Fingering, Teasing, Oral (Receiving), Marking, Mommy Kink, etc.

Mina was fun to be around, always able to make you laugh in your worst mood. Also incredibly silly and sweet. And she was really something to look at, always wearing the shortest shorts and the tightest crop tops around your college campus.

She had the body, so she decided to flaunt it. And who were you to judge her for that?

She told you from the start she wasn't going to settle down though. So maybe it's your fault. There's just always been something irresistible about Mina.

But boy did she get on your nerves sometimes.

You two just had sex, probably some of the best sex you'd ever had, and here she was. Laying next to you, texting her hoes. She didn't even try hiding her screen, she just didn't care.

You crossed your arms and looked away, obviously upset.

Mina noticed and after sending her text, looked at you. "C'mon, Baby girl.. Don't be like that." She rolled on top of you.

Refusing to look her in the eyes, you shook your head. "Don't let me stop you from texting other girls in my bed, Mina."

Sighing, she placed a small kiss to your cheek. "Baby, its nothing personal, you know that. I can't just leave 'em on read. That'd be.. rude." She continued to press light feathery kisses down your neck and breast.

"No, texting them in front of me is rude.." Your eyes slid shut, sighing softly as her massaging hands coaxed your thighs apart.

Moving between your legs, she gently kissed you cunt, teasing you with a small dip of her tongue.

Just as you were forgetting, her phone rang. You read the name of another woman from the screen in her hand and sighed deeply. "And now they ruined the vibe.."

She laughed and surprised you with the nerve to answer the call in front of you. "Hey, Mei. What's up?"

You scoffed. "Un-fucking-believable.."

Giving you a look, she gently rubbed your thigh again. "Oh, same. Yeah. Mhm. Mhm. Right."

It was becoming increasingly obvious that Mina was barely listening to Mei. You couldn't help but feel a bit bad for the woman on the other line.

That feeling washed away quickly though, as a soft gasp fell from your lips.

Mina grinned and rubbed her thumb in lazy circles around your clit. "Uh-huh. Yeah, same. Essays suck."

You licked your lips and looked up at her, only to see her staring straight back into your eyes.

Your eyes shut once more and your head fell back against your plush pillow. Your beautiful lips remained open in an 'O' as you let out silent whines.

Leaning down, she dipped her warm tongue between your folds, licking upwards over your sensitive clit.

You moaned quietly and tangled your fingers into her soft hair. Her pink curls swallowed your fingers and she gave a hum at the feeling.

"Please, Mina, please.." You whispered softly, grinding into her rough tongue.

She slowly sat up, causing you to whine as your hand slipped from her hair. Mina rubbed your clit against her fingers a bit before smacking your pussy.

Arching your back, you yelped loudly. "F-Fuck.." You whimpered weakly. "Mommy, I'm sorry, I meant Mommy.."

"Mm.. Huh? Oh, that? I'm just watching something. Yeah, pretty interesting." Her smile was sweet, but you could see the smirk behind it.

"Please help me, Mommy.." You hushed your tone again, squirming nervously as she rubbed your pussy once more.

Deciding to be merciful, her fingers collected slick between your folds before slowing dipping into your entrance. Her thumb pushed back and forth against your clit with every movement of her hand.

"G-God, Mommy.. Yess..!" You moved your hips against her fingers, panting softly. You could feel yourself getting hotter and hotter, wanting more and more.

She gave you a look as Mei questioned the noise. "Huh? Oh that? No that was.."

"You know, your work really- hah, isn't your best when you aren't- Ahh! P-Paying full a-attention.. T-Too bad, she must b-ee wayyy more impor-tant, huh..?"

Mina sighed at your stubborn attitude. If she cared at all, she didn't anymore.

She leaned down and shamelessly sucked and slurped at your clit, moaning softly at the taste.

You squealed and again brought your fingers into her curls. "S-Shit, shit..!"

"I was trying to be polite, but my little attention whore is being really greedy.." She whispered against your cunt.

You could hear Mei telling her off but you didn't care enough to focus on what she was saying. The only thing that mattered at the moment was Mina, and her attention was back on you.

"God, 'm sorry Mommy.." You slurred, feeling your toes curls as her fingers did too.

Lapping at your clit, she muttered between licks. "Fuck, pussy might just make me settle down baby.."

You knew it was a lie. She wasn't gonna settle down. And Mei would probably forgive her.

Oh well.

You cried out and allowed yourself to cum against her, giving no warning.

She moaned at thectaste if you, slowing to a stop. It was silent, so Mei must have hung up.

Both you and Mina panted before going into a small giggle fit.

Then came another call, except on your phone. Checking it with a sigh, your eyes lit up. "Ah, it's Todoroki- Hey!"

Mina took the phone and declined the call, tossing your phone to the bottom of the bed.

"Mina, Todoroki and I are supposed to study tomorrow. He was probably calling just to check and see if we're still on."

She called over your sensitive form, diving into your neck. You gasped loudly as she sucked and bit the flesh.

When she pulled away, you glared. "O-Oh I just know you left a mark.. I gotta call him back."

She put her entire weight on you. "Ah ah ah. You're busy."

Leave it to Mina to get jealous after answering a booty call in front of you.

[problematicfavesareproblematic]

Boys Who Speak With Silver Luck

Joe Liebgott x Reader

Ok, so THIS is more what I was intending to write for you, @itswormtrain​​! Hope you can learn to forgive me!!

This one is a soul sister/unofficial sequel to ‘You’ve Been Sad (Because I’ve Been Lonely)’ bc I’m bad at doing one shots 

Warnings: SMUT, domesticity, fluff, healthy dynamics, poetry being an aphrodisiac, feels(?)

All poetry mentioned is from the anthology No Thanks by ee cummings, and the title is from the song (inspired by 44 by ee cummings) comes from The Boys Are Too Refined by The Hush Sound

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

“I still don’t see how you can read those things.”

 You smirk to yourself, nudging his thigh with your foot as he sits at the foot of the bed. 

In retaliation,  Joe lightly traces the tip of his finger up the arch of your right foot and chuckles when you flinch at the tickle of it, the chuckle becoming a laugh when you lower your book and frown at his mirth.

“And here I thought you were actually wanting to do something nice for me,” you tease, letting him pull your foot back into his lap and watching him smirk as he returns to massaging the sore muscles there. “Should’ve known you were gonna betray me eventually….”

 He scoffs at your theatrics, mumbling a soft apology when you hiss in discomfort as his thumb works on a particularly tight knot just above your heel.

 “Why do you wear those things if they hurt your feet so badly?”

 You furrow your brows at him, resting the book on your stomach as you let a smile play on your lips.

 “They’re called heels, and I wear them because they make my legs look amazing.”

 Joe tilts his head to the side as his face takes on a contemplative expression.

  “‘This is true…” he says with a nod. “You look fuckin’ gorgeous in ‘em.”

 You offer a hmph in smug agreement, picking your book back up and continuing where you left off.

 Tonight had been the night of Chuck’s family’s yearly holiday party, the one night where both you and Joe dressed to the nines and got to rub elbows with people Joe and Chuck lovingly referred to as ‘rich snobs with inherent mommy fetishes’. 

Joe never failed to leave you starstruck when he wore his nicest uniform, and even though you didn’t wear yours, Joe always managed to convince you to pin your Purple Heart and as many unit citations you could fit to the breast of whatever dress you picked out. 

 “Fuckin’ love watching those ignorant fuck’s faces when they realize what a badass my wife is,” he had growled in your ear as you had gotten ready that night. “Gets me harder than a goddamn rock, you got no idea…”

 The two of you had danced and drank and laughed over some of the most amazing food you’d ever tasted. It had been perfect.

More and more things were becoming perfect as time went on and the dark horrific shadows of war began to shrink away under the bright California sunshine. 

It was heartbreakingly nice to see Joe happy, truly happy. He deserved it- you all deserved it.

 A groan of frustration is the only warning you get before Joe crawls up your body and plops himself atop you, the suddenness of the action making you release a grunting giggle. Undeterred by the obvious fact that you’re trying to read, he kisses at your chest through your shirt.

 “Pay” kiss “attention” kiss “to meeee” kiss

 You take one hand from the book to scratch lightly at his scalp, smiling at the sound of him humming in annoyance.

 “What’s in that dumb book that’s got you glued to it, huh? What can big words give you that my big—OW.”

 You cut him off by clunking the book gently against the back of his head, giving him a soft smile when he looks up at you with a frown.

 “You’re so needy,” you chastise hollowly. “Never thought you’d get jealous over something as silly as poetry—”

 Joe rolls his eyes. “Poems are for kids and nerds, don’t get what it is about-” he sits up a bit more so he can see the cover of your book. “Whatever an ee cummings is that’s got you so gaga over it…”

 You raise an eyebrow at him. “Believe it or not, Joseph, I think you’d actually like this guy’s poems—”

 Joe snorts before bringing his head back down to rest on your chest. “Yeah, okay—”

 “Hey,” you challenge, scooting up on your pillows so you can sit up, the movement bringing his head to your ribcage. “I’m serious! If you were to like any sort of poetry, you’d need it to be as sexual and swear-y as you are…. Here, listen-”

 Before he can protest, you flip to the one you had in mind: 44.

 “the boys i mean are not refined 

they go with girls who buck and bite 

they do not give a fuck for luck 

they hump them thirteen times a night

 one hangs a hat upon her tit 

one carves a cross on her behind 

they do not give a shit for wit 

the boys i mean are not refined…”

 “Gimme that!”

 Suddenly, the book is ripped from your hand- and before you can protest you are shocked to see Joe turn the book so he can bury his nose in it. Careful not to be smug about it, you bite back a smile as you watch him mouth the words as he reads. 

 The fact that you’re able to hold in a laugh when his eyebrows shoot up in surprise should make you eligible for another Purple Heart.

 When Joe’s eyes flick up to meet yours, he’s looking at you as if you’ve just done some suspicious slide of hand- intrigued but still somewhat cautious.

 “Well?” you ask. “What did you think?”

 Joe flicks his gaze down to the book again, like he thinks it may have changed somehow when he wasn’t looking.

 “Are they….all like this?”

 You do smile now. “Well, I’m not sure- I haven’t read them all yet.”

An idea pops into your mind as he flips through the pages of the book.

 “If you give it back, I can see if I can find another—”

 Joe suddenly smirks, and when he lifts his face so you can see him, he’s looking like the cat that ate the canary.

“Read this one.”

 Now you’re the hesitant one, taking the book back from him as if it could suddenly turn into a snake.

The poem he’s picked  is one you haven’t read yet, but if it’s one that Joe picked out you can only imagine what the subject matter is.

 “Okay then,” you say slowly, clearing your throat as you cast him a brief look of suspicion before beginning.

 “may i feel said he

 (i'll squeal said she 

just once said he) 

it's fun said she”

 (may i touch said he

 how much said she

 a lot said he) 

why not said she….”

 As you read, Joe’s hands come up to hold your sides as he kisses slowly across your chest, your stomach. Every so often, his thumbs smooth upward to rub across your shirt-covered  nipples, and you can feel him smile as he kisses at you.

 Your shirt has bunched up, revealing your hips and the sensitive skin between them. Your cheeks feel hot, and your mouth suddenly becomes dry as his lips drag between your hip bones promisingly.

His hair tickles your skin when he begins mouthing lower, to the waistband of your underpants.

 “Y/N?”

 “Yeah?” you sigh, tongue wetting your bottom lips as you begin to breathe heavier.

 “Keep reading.”

 Oh. You hadn’t realized that you’d stopped.

Clearing your throat, you blink a few times before finding the place you left off.

 “Uh, (let's go said he 

not too far said she 

what's too far said he 

where you are said she)

 may i stay said he 

(which way said she 

like...like this said he 

I-if you kiss said she- shit, Joe….”

 Joe’s warm hands have worked your underwear down your hips and around the swell of your bottom, and the heat of his breath across the thinner skin that he’s exposed has you losing focus again.

Because he’s nothing if not a consummate tease, he doesn’t do anything more than kiss only a sliver of the newly revealed skin.

 “Y/N…” he reminds you, nipping lightly at you when you groan in frustration. “I think there’s still some to go—”

 Your heart is thrumming in your chest, and it takes you a few seconds to find where you left off this time.

 “M-may i move said he

 is it love said she) 

if you're…..uh, if you’re willing said he 

(but….. you're killing said she….”

 The words have started to dance across the page, a whine coming from somewhere deep in your chest at the first touch of his fingers to the slick lips of your sex.

You’ve officially lost your place, now. You just pick the stanza your eye catches first and hope for the best.

 “(tiptop said he 

don't stop said she

 oh no said he) 

go slow said she- fuuuuuck…..

 I-(cccome?said he….goddamn it Joe, please!”

 You throw the book off to the side, sweat beading on your brow from how deliberately cruel Joe is being as he continues massaging at you. When Joe sees that you’ve started to shake, he lunges up the bed to wrap a hand around the back of your neck and kisses you messily- your teeth clacking together briefly as he buries his fingers inside of you and immediately finds the place that never fails to ruin you.

 Clinging to the front of his shirt, you squeeze your thighs together as a delicious tremor rolls up your body from where you’ve trapped his hand. You’re so worked up you almost want to cry, the heat in your lower belly almost bowing your back.

 “Does that feel good, Baby?” he mumbles against your lips. “Who is it that’s making you feel this good, huh?”

 You make an incoherent noise, quickly wrapping am arm around his shoulders to try and bring his mouth back to yours, mewling in frustration when he refuses to do so.

 “Ungh! Joe, I’m begging you!”

 “Say it again,” he says darkly, and if you had the strength to open your eyes you’d see just the power-drunk way he is looking down at you. “Do it—”

 “Joe! Joe Joe Joe Joe Joe….”

 You chant his name like a prayer, your voice dying in your throat as he starts using his palm to stimulate your neglected clit.

 With a silent scream, you come apart, head lolling back as he continues to coax you through your orgasm, dimly aware of the praise being kissed across your chin as he refuses to relent the punishing paste he’s established.

 Your face is throbbing with the strength of your thudding heart when he finally starts to slow down, your body still bowing and writhing as he begins to coo down at you sweetly, capturing your lips with his as your shaking starts to subside and your sweat begins to cool.

 “Good girl,” he sighs into your mouth. “You’re such a good girl for me….”

 You don’t reply- can’t reply.  Joe’s reduced you into a boneless mess of a woman.

 When you do eventually open your eyes, Joe is smiling down at you with an obvious affection that threatens to get your heart racing once more. Not taking his eyes from yours, he gently slides his fingers from your still-fluttering sex and makes a show of licking them clean. 

 With a mischievous wink, he uses his other hand to smooth your hair from your forehead before carefully rolling so he’s laying beside you, his shoulder pressed against your as he chuckles.

 “Huh, whaddaya know,” he says after he releases one of his fingers from between his lips with a lewd pop. “Guess poetry isn't that bad.”

 Using all of your energy, you turn your head to give him the weakest glare you think you’ve ever given.

 “When….when I can breathe witho’ havin’ to think about it so hard, I’m gon’ make you cum til you pass out.”

 Joe gives you a smiling kiss.

“And I’ll let you….once we finish round two.”

 Well, looks like I’ll be going back to the bookstore sooner than I thought.

~ ~ ~ Taglist: @mrseasycompany​ @itswormtrain​ @mrsalwayswrite​ @happyveday​ @sunsetmando​ @teenmagazines​ @liebgotttme​

[tuff-and-fluff-archives]

I hope everyone knows that even if I do indulge in "stinky rat bastard man" jokes about my sunshine Jamie, I DO genuinely think he is attractive and even if he makes crazy faces, he is still absolutely so stunning to me at all times 🥺💖🥺💖

LIKE???? 🥺🥺🥺🥺 I absolutely CANNOT get enough of his amazingly strong jawline and chin, and those big expressive eyebrows and those piercing, shining amber eyes, and that big sharp nose of his that just fits his face so perfectly and makes him even more handsome and OOOH HIS NOSE IS SO DAMN CUTE AND PERFECT FOR KISSING 🥺💖💖💖 And that smile, oh that DAMN SMILE is enough to make me MELT I stg if he flashed that smile at me I'd just go 😳😳 and have to look away cuz he just KILLS MEEEE 💖💖💖 ALSO OF COURSE I LOVE STARING AT HIS NECK MUSCLES AND ARM MUSCLES AND ABS AND PECS LIKE OHY GOD WHY IS HE SO SCULPTED 👀💖💖💖💖

So YES, I genuinely do think he is very, VERY handsome and in all honesty it's just even BETTER that he just very often makes faces like This

[kim-chann]

- - - Order Instructions ;; Hello~ I don’t know if I’m doing this right but here we go 😭 May I have a matchup in Jujutsu Kaisen? Pronouns: She/her Zodiac Sigh: Libra, Personality: Hardworking, Kind, Childish (lol I love to pull pranks on all of my siblings). Appearance: 5’5, long black hair (that’s mad thick for noooo reason) and hazel eyes! Couple fun facts is that I paint!

                                                           - - Anon

༺ Chef Note: Thank you for being my first customer for my new and revisioned blog! That being said, I’ll recommend you some songs with the character I match you up with that fit together with the two of you! Thank you for ordering, “Coffee Truffle Cake,” it’s one of my favourites 😉💕

I match you up with . . .

                         Gojo Satoru | 五条悟 !! ~

☉Lucky you! You got the strongest Jujutsu Sorcerer on your side!

☉ With his lucky-go attitude, you’re in for quite the ride, my god

☉ I really hope you have plenty of patience, cause he will be bothering you like it’s a habit of his. Ever since he was a student, he never changed on being a playful bastard that loves attention

☉Gojo found interest in you because of your cute attitude! He finds you truly adorable and he just wants to hold you in his arms! 

☉That being said, he will hold you in his arms until he’s happy, so I’m so sorry if you have work or school that you need to attend while he’s being dragged around with you, his arms around your waist and his face buried in your neck

☉If you ask him to let go, he’ll go pouty and say that he doesn’t want you to leave because he’s comfortable. (Which is strange because he can be bend backwards and still say he’s comfortable, as long as his arms are still around you haha)

☉ “Don’t leave meeee,” He would whine, his arms around your waist tightening as he nuzzles his nose into your neck, tickling your skin. “You don’t have to go to work/school, just stay hereeee.”

☉ “Gojo, you have a job as a teacher.”

☉ “...Oh fuck.”

☉ Sometimes he forgets he’s a teacher, so you’ll have to remind him sometimes haha

☉Gojo loves your sweet personality and cherishes it! Him having a sweet-tooth, you’re always the one that makes him happy with your sweet words that he cannot get enough of

☉He also adores that you love throwing pranks! He does them all the time to his co-workers and usually to his students, so expect him to make a plan with you to prank somebody because he’s straight up bored. 

☉His sense of humour is strange and will possibly even laugh at a horror movie when a victim gets killed by a serial killer. It’s a bit worrying, but with his nonchalant attitude, it’s something that you will see quite often.

☉Based on your appearance, he might call you, “bear”, “baby”, “dear”, and the best of all, “head-rest.”

☉ Yes, I said that. 

☉With the huge height difference of you being 5′5″ and him being 6′4″, he’s like a foot taller than you. So he likes to rest his arms on your head as you both walk side-by-side.

☉Sometimes when he see’s you with your guard down standing, he’ll appear behind you and shove you down his uniform shirt so you don’t know what the hell is going on while you struggle in the fabric while he’s laughing like a maniac 

☉He’s mean, but it’s his love language he speaks 

☉Since you say you love painting, expecting him to ask you to paint him nude.

☉He’ll love to see your painting and would adore every little detail you paint onto your canvas! 

☉ Gojo is amazed by the patience and the imagination that you have to have painted such a master piece because he knows he can’t draw for shit

☉Gojo is very vocal to saying that he loves you and loves giving kisses onto your face when you allow him to

☉Overall, he’s a very fun and attention-needy lover, but every single day, you’re going to wake up and have the best moments of your life with this sorcerer

       Bonus Songs - - -  

   - She Chose me - Bruno Major 

           - - Happiness - Rex Orange County 

                     - - - Olivia - One Direction

                                - - - - Cold Feet - Tayo Sound 

                                            - - - - - I Love You So - The Walters

Chef Note: Thank you for ordering! Please come again soon!!

[feathers-and-fisticuffs]

Making Amends...

[chapter list here]

You stubborn idiot...”  Nanu covered his mouth, tears on his cheeks, not sure whether to laugh or cry now.  “Why did you do it?”

Kabu groaned, still coughing up water.  “You’re the stubborn idiot...”

“Don’t make this about me!”  He smacked Kabu’s arm.  “You could have died!  If I hadn’t been able to get to you in time I-- You--!”

“It doesn’t matter.”  He shrugged.  “‘Least I wouldn’t have to go home...”

Nanu slapped his arm again.  “Idiot!”  He sighed when Kabu gave him a weak smile.  “Don’t talk like that.”

Kabu couldn’t help but laugh weakly, and held out one fist straight up, a set of dog tags dangling from them.  “I saved them...”

Nanu rubbed his eyes and shook his head.  “Keep ‘em.  For Arceus sake...”  He laid down next to Kabu, and stared up at the darkening sky.  “We could run away.  Forget about all this, find our own lives our own way.”

Kabu smiled sadly and let his arm fall on top of Nanu’s chest, dog tags jingling.  “You wish, lover boy.”

Basil cheered loudly, watching as Kabu defeated his opponent.  He had seen a lot of Pokemon battles, but this one, by far, had been the most exciting.  He waved when Kabu looked his way, wondering if he could even be seen in the excitement of the crowd, secretly hoping that thumbs up was all for him.

“And the winner is -- Kabu!  The Fire Type Master brings home another victory!”

Kabu held up a fist, smiling wide for the audience, putting on a show before shaking his opponents hand and clearing the field for the next two challengers.  Bede, who had been knocked out of the match early on by Piers, sat beside him.

“He’s not even that great.”  He muttered, arms crossed and a sour look plastered upon his face.

“Don’t be like that!  That was an amazing match!  Aren’t you happy for him?  He’s doing a good job!”  Basil sat back down and shoved his shoulder playfully.  “You were great too you big jerk.”

“Hmph.”  Bede wrinkled his nose at that.  “I was distracted.  I should have won.  The... sun was in my eyes.”

“Yeah yeah, whatever you say mate.”  Basil giggled.  “Is Leon going to be battling today?”

“Probably not.  He’s got too much on his hands already dealing with Rose’s company, and the Battle Tower.  You’ll get to see the new Champion in action though.  So that will be boring.”  He huffed.

“Be nice!  Didn’t you say you two were getting along now?”

“I don’t get along with anyone.”

Basil laughed.  “You get along with meeee~”

“You keep shoving me that’s gonna change!”  He threatened, but couldn’t hide his smile as he shoved back.

“Bede!”  Basil was thankful to see him relax a little bit.  He knew how hard Bede could be on himself, and sometimes he couldn’t see through all the negative to realize just how strong he could be.

One day, he knew, Bede would become Champion all by himself.

************

Kabu sat alone in the locker rooms, hair still wet and slicked back from the showers, towel around his waist, holding the dog tags around his neck in a tight fist close to his chest, eyes closed and breathing evenly.  It was his post-battle meditation, but he couldn’t manage to quiet his mind.

“You’re kidding, you still have that stupid necklace?”

The break in the silence startled him and Kabu leapt to his feet, almost losing his towel in the process.  “Nanu?!”  He could feel his cheeks growing hot with embarrassment at being caught in such a venerable way.  He hadn’t let go of the dog tags, still clutching them to his chest.

“You stubborn idiot...”  Nanu smiled, arms crossed tightly in front of him, nervously hovering.  “Why’d you do it?”

“You’re the stubborn idiot.”  Kabu smiled too.

“I’m sorry.  I said a lot of things that I shouldn’t have said.”  He started, watching Kabu drop the necklace to put his hand on his hip. 

“You think?”

“Let. Me. Finish.”  He took a step forward, punctuating each word with a poke to the chest.  “Ass.”

Kabu raised his eyebrows and made a lock and key motion over his mouth, pretending to toss it behind him.

“I know it’s a touchy subject.  And I was out of line.  I think. Maybe... I was feeling... Jealous.”  He admit, as if he had a gun to his head.  “And I lashed out.”

“Jealous?!”  Kabu couldn’t contain the laugh that escaped him, feeling guilty when he saw Nanu react.  “No, no come on I’m sorry, keep going.  I’m sorry.”  He grabbed Nanu by the wrist.  “Please.  Continue.”

“Keep it up and I’m not gonna be sorry anymore.”  Nanu growled.  “I don’t really have anything else to say.  But I’m sorry.  And I won’t do it again.  I’ll try to keep a filter on it.”  He muttered, and looked away.

Kabu laughed quietly, tugging on his wrist.  “Nanu~”

“What?”  He stepped closer, they were almost chest to chest, but he looked over his shoulder still, unable to look Kabu in the eye.

“Nanu.”  His voice grew more urgent, and it finally drew back the gaze of his old friend.  

“Wha--” 

Kabu lifted himself up on his tiptoes, still tugging Nanu’s wrist, and captured his lips in a sweet, delicate kiss.  “I forgive you.”

Nanu grinned then, looking starstruck and euphoric, as if he’d just found the most amazing drug, and cupped Kabu’s cheeks in his hands, pulling him back for another, rougher kiss, thankful that this time, Kabu didn’t pull away.

“Am I still in the doghouse?”  He asked when they finally separated, both of them left breathless and gasping for air.

Kabu grinned at that and draped his free arm over Nanu’s shoulder.  “Oh, big time.”

The clearing of a throat made both men jump, and Kabu instinctively hid behind the taller man, still clinging to his towel.

“Are we interrupting?”  Bede looked less than impressed, hands on his hips and tapping his foot impatiently with Basil standing next to him, covering his eyes and leaning against Bede for support.

“S-sorry... I just wanted to come find you after your match...”  

Kabu blushed even more and scrambled to find clothes.  “Oh Arceus, Basil go wait outside!  I mean we weren’t doing anything!  I mean... Bede please take your brother outside!”

Nanu laughed as he watched Kabu flounder around the locker room, searching desperately for his common decency.

Bede rolled his eyes, putting a hand on Basil’s back and leading him back out to the hall.  He couldn’t help but smirk at Kabu as he did, feeling like whatever battle they were fighting, he had won this round.

Kabu quickly tossed on his clothes, cursing and threatening Nanu with bodily harm at each little quip he made.

“Guess you’re gonna have to give him the talk now, huh?”  Nanu snickered when Kabu’s ears went red.

“Nanu I’m going to kill you and they’ll never find your body, I swear!”  He was embarrassed down to his core.  This was no way to conduct himself.  He had a responsibility! To... to not do whatever that just was!

“Relax, Kabu.  He’s not five.  You don’t have to pretend like you’ve never thought about kissing someone in your life ever.  I’d be willing to put money on the fact that he’s kissed more girls than you have.”  He winked.

Kabu slicked his hair back, before smacking Nanu’s arm.  “You are NOT helping!”  Hearing Nanu laugh calmed him though.  This wasn’t the end of the world.  This wasn’t even a bad thing.  He was just panicking over nothing.  Probably.

“Ow!  Hey, save it for the bedroom!”  Nanu chuckled, drawing his shoulders up at the glare he received.  “Okay!  Okay I’m done I’m putting the filter on now!”  He promised, and covered his mouth.  “Filter’s on I won’t say anything stupid anymore.”

“I highly doubt that.”  Kabu quipped quickly before rushing out the door and giving Nanu a chance to fire back.

Basil and Bede were both sitting on a bench just outside the locker room, Bede was giggling and Basil was shoving him.  “Shut up you’re so embarrassing oh my God!” 

“Basil?”  Kabu straightened his slightly wrinkled uniform, and Bede burst out laughing again.

“Bede shut UP!”  Basil whined and covered his face.  “You’re so weird!  Stop making fun of me!”

“Bede be nice to your brother.”  Kabu scolded, still feeling the embarrassment radiating off of him in waves.

“You’re not my dad.”  He shot back, glaring suddenly.  He didn’t like being told what to do.  Especially not by Kabu.”

“And thank goodness for that.  Everyone’s happy.”  He held out his hand for Basil to take, helping him to his feet.  He regretted it, but if Bede was going to be a troublemaker, he’d learn what it feels like to throw stones.

Basil held Kabu’s arm to steady himself, looking exhausted from all of the excitement.  “Bede?  Aren’t you coming?”

Bede glanced down at his rotom phone.  “Yeah I’ll... catch up.”  His voice was suddenly very sober.  “See you in a bit, I’ve got some... stuff to do.”

“Oh... Okay...”  He let Kabu walk him out of the stadium, Nanu following quietly behind.

Kabu made it to the lobby before stopping suddenly, his guilt getting the better of him.  “Hey, I forgot something.  Sit here with Nanu I’ll be right back.  And you?  Don’t say a word.”  He pointed a finger at Nanu who raised his hands in surrender.  “I’m Serious.”

He turned and hurried back to the locker rooms.   He turned the corner, and found Bede still on the bench where they had left him, knees pulled to his chest with his face hidden.  Kabu grit his teeth, he had done this now he had to undo it. 

“Bede...”

He fought the urge to rush over to comfort the startled boy, watching him almost fall flat on his face as he rushed to his feet.  “Stay away from me, stay away!  What do you want?  Don’t touch me!”

Kabu’s heart ached, in that moment he looked so much like Basil it hurt.  “It’s okay.  It’s okay, I’m gonna stay right here.  I just wanted to apologize.  I was rude, and I didn’t mean to say that.”

Bede rubbed his eyes and took another step back, falling back onto the bench.  “Well I’m not sorry!  And you’re right!  I’m glad you’re not my dad!”  He snapped, wrapping his arms around himself.  “I hate you!”

Kabu nodded.  “I know.  You can hate me all you want.  I don’t blame you.  But I am sorry.  I let my temper get the better of me again.”  He admit.  “You’re a good kid, Bede.  I’d be proud to call you my son.  I know Rose was too.”

That didn’t seem to be the right thing to say, as Bede burst into tears, covering his face in the collar of his coat. 

“Bede?  What’s wrong?  I’m sorry, I know that might still be a sore spot, I...”

He muttered something, and it made Kabu stop talking.

“What?”

It took a moment for him to lift his head and speak clearly again.  “I hate that Basil is happy with you!”  He said, finally.  “I hate it it isn’t fair!  You aren’t his dad!”

He was startled, but not surprised.  “Oh, Bede... may I sit?”  He asked, waiting for a response before moving closer and scaring him more.  Bede just covered his face, making a frustrated noise.  Kabu cautiously took this as a yes, and sat down next to him.

“Rose liked him better too... everyone likes him better than me and it’s not fair..!”

Kabu gently put an arm around his shoulders, not wanting to do anything to scare him off or make him think he was in danger.  “That isn’t true.  Rose loved you both very much.”  He said softly.  “He wanted to do right by you two, I know he did.  He’s just an idiot.”

“You don’t know that!  You don’t know anything!”

“I know he came to have a not so friendly chat with me, after we met.”  He chose his words carefully.  Truth be told, Rose had beaten the shit out of him.  But he decided not to go into too much detail.  It was a humiliating night he did not want to relive.

“Why do you hate me?”  Bede sniffled and rubbed his eyes.  “What did I do to make you hate me?”

“I don’t hate you kid.  I promise.  You’d know it if I hated you.  I wouldn’t be here right now.”

Bede was slowly starting to get comfortable, and had turned toward Kabu, pressing his face into his shoulder as he tried to stop crying.  “You’re so nice to Basil...  Even when he messes up you’re nice to him.”

“And I should be nicer to you, too.”  Kabu admit.  “I’m sorry.  Why don’t you come home with us?  Stay one more night?  It’s late, Opal would strangle me if I let you go home in the dark.”

Bede laughed a little at that.  “Then maybe I should go home now.”

Kabu smiled.  “Oh yeah, real funny kid.”  He started to stand, but Bede grabbed onto his shirt suddenly, as if he was afraid Kabu would leave him.  He scooted back onto the bench and put his arms around the boy, hugging him tight.  “Hey, what’s up?  It’s going to be alright...”

Bede pulled the letter out of his pocket, not wanting Kabu to let go.

“Hm?  What is it?”  He took the letter and read it over Bede’s head as he clung to him, squeezing a little tighter as he glanced through it.

“Did you tell Basil?”

“No...”

Kabu nodded and ruffled his curly white hair.  “Good.  It’s better that way, for now.  He needs to get his confidence up before Rose tried wedging his way back into your lives.”  

“I can’t bring myself to be mad...”  He admit.  “I want to be mad, I want to hate him like Basil does, but I... can’t.”

Kabu held out his arm to Bede, to help him stand.  “It’s alright.  I understand.  You don’t have to hate him if you don’t want to hate him.  But it doesn’t mean you have to forgive him.  If he really wants to reconnect with you, he’s just going to have to go at your pace, not the other way around.”

Bede nodded at that, thankful that finally, someone was making sense of the chaos in his head.  “Okay.  Uh.”  He pulled his arm away once they were both standing and retreated back into his cold, emotionless old self.  “I’ll meet up with you and Basil in a while.  I really do have a few things to take care of.”

Kabu didn’t push things further.  “Of course.  I’ll leave the door open.”

He turned to leave, pausing as Bede grabbed onto him quickly again, looking for one last comforting hug, before silently stalking off as if he hadn’t just broken down in front of Kabu.

Kabu was pretty surprised it had happened too, if he was being honest.  Somehow, he always forgot that beneath that rude attitude of a brick wall, there was a kid inside who was just as hurt by what Rose had done as Basil.  He would be more careful next time.

************

Nanu sat with Basil in the lobby, bouncing one leg nervously as he glanced around.  “So uh.  Those matches sure were something...”

Basil glared at him, trying to channel Bede in his stare.  “Kabu told you not to talk.”  He tried to make himself sound intimidating.

He laughed nervously.  “Chill, kid.  Just being polite.”

“He is way out of your league you know.  He deserves someone with respect.  Who is kind.  And nice.  And not a big jerk.”

Nanu grimaced then.  “Yikes.  Okay then.”  He bit his tongue before he let slip an insult and stared at the wall to his left.

“You ready to go, Basil?”  Nanu appeared again from within the gym.

“Please.”  He stood, nose raised haughtily.

Kabu smiled.  “Alright.  Nanu, behave.”

“What?  I didn’t even do anything!”

“He tried to talk to me.”  Basil tattled.

“I was making small talk!”

Kabu kissed Nanu’s cheek.  “Goodnight, Nanu.”  He handed Basil his cane and walked him out the door, looking once over his shoulder and giving his old friend a shy smile.

Nanu sighed.  This was an obstacle he had not been prepared for.

************

Bede crawled back into bed next to Basil when he got in, much calmer now and looking more exhausted than anything.  He wrapped around Basil in a hug, staying quiet.  Basil just smiled and yawned.

Kabu brought Basil a glass of water, smiling when he saw the two of them looking happy.  “Goodnight Basil.”  He kissed his forehead and made sure he was tucked in, then moved to the other side of the bed.  “Goodnight Bede.”

Bede turned away, he didn’t want to look at Kabu.  This felt like being made fun of and he didn’t like it.

Kabu just leaned over and kissed the top of his head, draping a blanket over him.  “Sleep well boys.” 

He left the door open just a crack as he left.

Bede watched him leave the room, feeling tears well in his eyes.  What kind of game did he think he was trying to play?

“Told you he didn’t hate you.”  Basil muttered sleepily.  “He thinks you’re a jerk, probably.  But he doesn’t hate you.”

Bede sunk down into the other pillow.  “I am a jerk.  Maybe he should hate me.”

“You are a jerk.”  Basil yawned.

“And?”

“No and.”  He giggled when Bede tried to push him out of bed.

“Goodnight Basil.”  He huffed.

Basil fell asleep before he could respond.

[commander-poptart]

Poptart settled his hat back onto his head before finally sliding the shoddily wrapped gift over in Naoko’s direction. “Here,” he adjusted the bow on top. “You can open this now.”

“Poptart it’s New Years Eve,” Naoko squeaked drastically. “You made me wait a whole six days after Squidmas. The suspense was killing meeee...”

“Oh, okay, I’ll just return it then...” Poptart wrapped his receiver around the box and began pulling it away.

“No! No. Better late than never,” Naoko smiled as she scrambled to pull the present back to her. She cleared her throat. “Really, thank you. You didn’t have to get me anything.”

Poptart shook his head, the light from the fire glinting off of his metal face. “I knew more than well that I had to. Now stop thanking me and start opening. Having to stare at my wrapping is killing me.”

Naoko calmly put her fingers on the bow, which promptly fell apart with the slightest tug. She let out a laugh as Poptart slapped his receiver over his face. Continuing down the box, she dug into the loose wrapping, creating a hole for the top of the box to be seen. From here, all she had to do was lift the lid.

“I’m so excited,” Naoko whispered loud enough for Poptart to hear. If the AI had a mouth, it would be smiling subtly, pleased with how something as small as a present could invoke such excitement in the inkling.

Naoko took the top off the box and pulled out a white silk scarf from inside. Her face lit up as she lifted it into the air to view it in full.

“Poptart, it’s gorgeous!” she didn’t hesitate to wrap it around her neck. It settled almost perfectly between her hair and collar. “How do I look?”

Poptart looked at her softly and said, “As beautiful as you always are...”

A big smile crawled across Naoko’s face, her cheeks lighting up red. Now the compliment along with the scarf was making her too hot, and she embarrassingly tugged at the delicate cloth.

“There’s more,” Poptart edged her on.

“What?” Naoko gasped, turning her attention back to the box. She peered inside, and sitting on a little pillow inside was a bracelet adorned with two small charms.

“A bracelet? For me?” Naoko exclaimed with amazement. “A charm bracelet! Is that one of those old rotary phones? I’ve only seen pieces of one like that. And... is that a eaten bean?”

“No! It’s half a heart! It’s not a bean!” Poptart’s speaker crackled, more than slightly offended.

“So it’s a broken heart?”

“Half. Half of a whole heart.”

Naoko looked back down at the bracelet. “Then... where’s the other half?”

“Poptaaaaaaaaaaart... That’s so sweet,” Naoko grabbed the old phone and squeezed him into a hug. His expression screamed shock, not expecting the sudden physical contact.

Naoko pushed Poptart’s head up a bit before kissing him on the side of his face plate. His speaker sputtered out a bit of smoke, or perhaps dust, as he tried to look away.

Naoko couldn’t help but smile at his shyness. “So, do you have any New Years resolutions?” she asked, changing the subject.

“I want to try being a bit more forward...” Poptart said quietly.

“Oh, that’s good. I’m sure production in the metro will greatly inc-”

The butt end of Naoko’s words came out muffled as Poptart pushed his speaker over her mouth, awkwardly returning her gesture. As he pulled away, he watched as Naoko let out a cough.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry,” Poptart whined in a panic, forgetting he was still smoking though his speaker.

Naoko waved her hand in front of her face, “I’m good!” Another cough. “I thought it was cute. Thank you... and Happy New Years.”

Poptart let her settle close to him; turning his attention back to the roaring flames. Despite it all, he was still giving off more smoke than even the fire. While both of them noticed, they decided to just laugh it off.

[canumoveurseatup-no]

Outlaws pt.2

Summary: (requested) While wreaking havoc around the nation, it became a little lonely with just you and Loki, so you bring some friends along for the ride

Pairing: Loki x Black!Witch!Reader

WC: 4K

Warnings: small descriptions of a seance, mentions of dark magic, raising the dead, turning good people into bad people

A/N: So glad people liked Villian!Reader so much! It was requested a few times to make a part two so here it is! Please reblog and comment!! PLEASE READ A/N AT THE END!!!

“All I’m saying is that I think it will be more fun if there were more of us!” you try to plead your case as you and Loki enter your bunker.

“Sweetheart, more people will just result in us getting caught. We already have the UN on our asses. Let’s lay low for a bit and enjoy some time off,”

He pulls you close and bites his lip as he stares down at you. 

You and Loki couldn’t be happier. You two had no one to stop you as you lived your villainous lives. The world was still mourning the Avengers, months after their tragic death, as you two caused catastrophe around the world. In North Korea, Loki created a black hole and had people sucked into it, experiencing their worst nightmares. In Russia, you created a monster tornado, taunting the place and crushing everything that stood in its way. In California you two lit the place up in flames, almost putting the whole entire state in ashes.

You two documented your crimes and just like always, watched the news of the aftermath as if it were your favorite movie. Now you wanted more people with you because it gets lonely with it just being you and Loki in this bunker, you wanted company.

“Lokiiiii,” you whined, “I can just summon someone, they’ll be under my control, there won’t be any risks!,” you try to reason with him but he was still skeptical.

“While I understand your love and drive to keep practicing your necromancy, I still say not yet. Come on, we’re the most talked about thing right now! They’re calling us Armageddon personified! Let us celebrate this moment,” 

“Pleeeaaaaase,” you bat your lashes and pout, twisting your body back and forth as you waited for him to reply.

“Just one other person, Y/N. I’m not kidding,” he points his finger, finally giving in and you start jumping up and down in excitement.

“Yes! Yes Yes!,” you squeal as you run in a small circle and wave your hands.

“Okay okay okaaay!,” Loki stops you, “Now that I’ve granted you your wish, can we have our celebratory sex now?,”

You stand on your tip toes and kiss his chin, “Yes, my King,”

-------

You two lied in bed with a blanket over you as you two stared at the ceiling.

“Who do you think I should summon? Hela?,” you ask him

“Absolutely, most definitely not!,” he almost breaks his neck to look at you.

“What about that doctor we tortured not too long after the tower incident? What was his name? It was something weird... Like.. Dr. Peculiar, Dr. Dubious? Dr. Suspicious,”

“Dr. Strange, you twit,”

“Wow, rude,” you gasp, “Anyway, what about him?,”

“Uh no. As soon as he comes back, we’re goners,”

“Ugh, this is harder than I thooouuught,” you slap your hands on the mattress and sigh.

“Why not Skurge? he was like a lost puppy. Following anything you tell him to do,”

“He was also a fucking idiot,” you laugh

“Doug?,” Loki tries again

“Who the fuck is Doug?!,”

“Ooookay, maybe not then,”

You two think long and hard about who you could possibly bring back to life to be your third party and participate in the game that is ruining lives of those below you. It finally clicks in your head and you gasp, sitting up in bed.

“I’ve got it!,” you lift your finger as if a light bulb just went off

Loki stared at you and mumbled an “Uh oh,” while staring at you wide eyed, “This can’t be good,”

--------

“You worry too much, my love,” you pat his cheek as you light the last candle. You take your sacred dagger and cut your palm and add a drop of your crimson to the four poles around the circle of ash and sage. 

“You’ve been holding off on telling me who you decided to summon. Of course I’m a little worried. It could be my father for crying out loud,”

“Your father was a lying, secretive, fake piece of shit. I wouldn’t choose him if my life depended on it,”

Loki’s shoulders seemed to have dropped in relief as you shut the door and turned the lights off.

You stood at the East pole of the circle and placed a piece of red metal on the drop of blood. You go to the South pole of the circle and place a pair of glasses over the red dot. On the West pole, you place a wire and once you get to the North pole of the circle, you place something of yours over the drop and it was a picture of you and the summoned. You went back to stand by Loki and began chanting the spell under your breath, chanting slowly and quietly until the flames on the candles started to get bigger and you raised your voice along with the flames.

A rush of air started to blow around the room and one of the candles tipped over, lighting the circle on fire as well as the belongings of who is being summoned.

“Rise!,” you raise your hands as you shout and the circle of flames makes a wall before immediately falling and you two are left there staring at the empty circle.

“N-no one is there,” Loki points to the circle.

“They won’t always appear in the circle, they’ll appear anywhere in the vicinity of the summoning,”

Your point was proven when you heard a crash of glass downstairs.

“What the hell are you doing?!,”- - “Meee? Look at what you did, dimwit,”

“Sweetheart, I don’t like the sound of that,”

You and Loki rush downstairs and follow the voices to the kitchen

“It’s been a bit of a while okay? When I died I expected to have stayed dead!,”

“Well yeah duh. But who the hell would raise us from the fucking dead?,”

You and Loki stand in the doorway of the kitchen at the two bickering people.

“Y/N, I said one person!,” he gawks and turns to you, “You had one job, just the one!,”

You didn’t hear him as the two people stopped bickering to look at you two.

“Oh no, not him, please God anyone else but him!,”

“Y/N?!,”

You smiled in confusion as why how two people are standing in front of you when you asked for just one. You did everything right, maybe your ancestors were having a two for one deal.

“Y/N, did you bring us back?,” 

“I sure did,” you stand straight and nod proudly.

“Just when I thought I was finally put out of my misery,”

“Yeah, me too,” Loki rolls his eyes, 

You slap his arm and softly scold before turning back to the two resurrected in front of you. 

“Don’t be that way Brucey,” you pout and he just pinches the bridge of his nose.

“How and why are we here, Y/N. You literally killed us all,”

You frown and cross your arms, “Well you don’t sound so grateful Tony!,”

“Can we send them back? Please, for the love of everything that is evil and disturbing!,”

“Oh Loki stop acting like a baby!,” you stomp your feet and scowl at him,

“Sweetheart, they’re gonna kill us!,”

“Damn right we are,” Bruce nodded and started turning green. You smack him upside his head and he turned back to his normal shade, “H-how the hell did you do that?,”

“You’re under my control. I control you, you can’t hurt me. Therefore, you can not Hulk out without my say so,” you smile and you can hear Loki gasp in relief. 

“Y/N, what the hell!,” Bruce throws his hands in the air.

Tony is just staring you with his typical “what the fuck” face but you’re just as chipper as ever. Smiling back at them, they had no idea what you had in store. 

“Why. are. we. here?,” Tony spoke in staccato and you looked to Loki who was just leaning on the wall looking completely unimpressed with you.

“I got lonely. I wanted some company in causing catastrophe around the place,” you swirled your finger in the air in a circle, “Loki said I could raise someone, I was just expecting you but I got Bruce as well which makes it all the more fun!,” you clap your hands and they just face palm at you.

“How the hell did you manage to raise us both from the dead?,” Bruce asks running a hand over his face.

“Hmph, You don’t sound very appreciative,”

“Maybe because you fucking killed us,” Tony yelled at you and you saw the betrayal in his eyes. He was one of the few to actually believe in you and stand by your side to defend you when the others came at you. So you understood why he felt the way he did.

“I know I-,” you looked to Loki once again and he just put his hands up in surrender, “I made a bad judgement call... it should have just been Steve.. a-and Natasha, Clint... Bruce you were in the middle..,”

“It shouldn’t have been anyone! You did this to her!,” Tony pointed to Loki and he never looked so irritated but you stepped in his way to block him from Loki, who hadn’t moved a muscle.

“Tony...it wasn’t him I just... was never meant to be the good guy, y’know?,” you shrug and play with your wedding ring, “Maybe if I wasn’t forced into it, things wouldn’t be like this but.. they are now and I wouldn’t change it for the world. This is my story. Yours was to be the good guy, and every good guy needs a antagonist,”

“But there’s no story if you kill off all the protagonists,” Bruce rolls his eyes and scoffs.

You look over Tony’s shoulder and smile at Bruce, “That’s where you guys come in,” 

“Oh it’s definitely the end times,” he sighs, “What do you mean?,”

“Well... you’re the good guys I’m the bad woman. You’re under my control which means you’ll follow all I do which is.. wreak havoc, but you still have your own judgement. There’s no good guy now because I killed them off and I got sick of it so I raise the question... aren’t you guys sick of being the good guys?,”

---------

“I’ve come to terms with you raising these two idiots but now you want to raise the whole brigade, all of which my brother is a part of, to play a game of cat and mouse?,” Loki raises his voice and turns red in the face.

“Don’t yell at meeee,” you whine as you walk around in the vacant conference room in the tower, “You lived to antagonize them, so what’s the problem?,”

“Uuuh, we murdered them, painfully at that!,” he states obviously.

“You truly underestimate me. My dear husband, that hurts,” you wipe a fake tear away and he just looks at you as if you’re insane. But he was too so he had no room to judge.

“My powers can not be subdued. If they catch us, we can easily escape. They cannot stop what they can not understand. I am simply too powerful for them,” you cock an eyebrow and he just shakes his head.

Tony and Bruce were standing in the corner watching as you set a personal item of each of the team around the circle. You’ve come to find out that you used Bruce’s glasses instead of Tony’s and that’s how you ended up raising them both, so you made sure to know whose items belong to who.

They took your offer to be your henchman, realizing the world viewed them as criminals anyway so why not? Might as well go ahead and fully play the part since people had been saying they were.

You cut your palm once again with your sacred dagger and repeated the same steps you took when you raised Tony and Bruce. This time Loki, reluctantly, helped you with this chant. 

You made sure to do a pre-spell type thing to make sure they weren’t connected to you, that way they could fight you back.

Once the candles blew out, you were all left standing there in the dark, waiting for any sign that the team came back. 

“What the HELL?,” 

“Welp... there’s Sammy boy,”

Loki quickly teleported you all to the common room where everyone was and you watched them freak out as they realized they were alive once again.

“Who the hell did this?,” Bucky growls.

“Guilty as charged,” you stuck your hand in the air and they all turned to you scowling. They began running to you, but you simply stuck your hand up freezing them in place but they could still tell what was going on and talk. Just not move to attack you.

“Y/N, brother, what the hell is going on?!,” Thor questions.

“Mmm this is what someone once called... a game of cat and mouse,” your voice had dropped and sounded suspenseful and mysterious.

“What is that supposed to mean?,” Wanda asks, eyeing you, and Loki then to Tony and Bruce, “Why the hell are you two with her?,” her voice cracked and you scowled at the sound, it was such a pathetic noise.

“Being bad isn’t so bad after all,” Bruce shrugged

“What is going on?!,” Steve’s voice rumbles through the room.

“OH!,” you gasp, voice laced with fake surprise, “He speaks!,” 

“Y/N, if you let us go and you stop doing this, we won’t turn you in. Just stop this,”

“No can do, Steve-O,” you tsk, “What the hell is the fun in that?,” 

They all begin to talk at once and you can only hear bits and pieces here and there about how you’re such an evil bitch, how you’ll burn in and hell, how when they get their hands on you it will be nothing compared to what you’ve done, blah blah blah

“Are you done?,” you ask, “I brought you back so you can continue to do your jobs. Six months of being dead is enough time to sleep. Now it’s time for the real fun,” You grab Loki’s hand while Bruce and Tony step up close behind you two.

“Bruce.. Don’t do this,” Natasha whispers.

“Tony, you’re better than this,” Rhodey yells but they’re not hearing it. They’ve made up their mind and while in some cases people regret being bad, neither of them would take back their choice to stick with you.

“You’ll pay for this. All of this. We won’t stop until we’ve found you all,” Vision grunts in pain as you start to power him down from the inside just by looking at him.

“You’ve all gotta catch us first!,” you release them and they continue to run towards you but you snap your fingers and the four of you are back in your bunker.

“Now what?,” Loki exhales as he sits on the couch, the other two following suit. 

“Now... now we wait. We leave red herrings here and there, letting them think they’re onto us then we turn the tables. We gotta drive em insane a bit,”

-------

“She was just here!,” a citizen cried out to Steve, like you said, you all had been leaving red herrings and they were dumb enough to follow them

“Which way?,” Steve asks, breathing heavily. 

“I-I don’t know sh-she just disappeared, her and the man while long hair,” the lady cried in fear and distress. Steve did his best to calm her down before running away in a direction that he heard more screams from.

When he was far enough down the street, the woman called for him, “Captain America!,” 

Steve turns around and furrows his brows, “Yes, ma’am?,”

“I- I think I just saw her again,” she screams frantically

“Where? Tell me, we have to catch her, she’s extremely dangerous!,” 

The woman continues to cry but then she just stops and wipes her tears and begun laughing, this confused Steve. That woman was just yelling in fear since there was an explosion in the area which had everyone on edge.

“They should have taught you better,” the woman’s had gone low and menacing.

“Excuse me?,” Steve didn’t have time for these games, he had a city to save, a world to save.

“You’d think all the effort they put into training you all, you’d have been a lot fucking smarter,” she laughed.

Steve’s face dropped as the woman faded into you. You were standing before his eyes and you were literally just in his grasp. You crossed you arms laughing and shaking your head.

“Man, you guys are a bunch of idiots. To think I was lumped in with you guys,” you scoff and watch him stare back at you in awe.

“Things aren’t always as they seem to be, Golden Boy,” you wave your finger at him in shame and that’s when he remembered he was trying to stop you. He breaks out into a sprint and you blow a kiss before disappearing again, making him fall on his face when he jumps to grab you.

“She’s still on the run, guys,” he speaks into the com and curses under his breath, “She was right in my grasp and I was dumb enough to let her slip out of it,”

------

“Good boooy,” You pet Hulk’s hair as you were on his back and he jumps around the the woods in Germany. 

“Hulk not dog,” he grunts

“You’re right. I apologize my sweetness,” you kiss his head and he grunts in approval.

“You see that place over there with all the pretty lights?,” you point into the distance and show him the Brandenburg Gate. The sun was starting to set so the lights illuminating the landmark was easy to spot

He nods is head as you climb off him and sit in the trees, 

“Smash,” you lean forward and tell him. He huffs and smiles before jumping out into the town and you smile when you hear the screams echoing as he ruins the place. You see Tony fly over blasting other buildings to ruins. You hear the roar of the quinjet and that’s when the show can really begin. You watch the Avengers leave the jet to try and stop Tony and Hulk but they can’t be stopped. Not with your spell anyway.

Loki appears beside you and smiles at the orange blaze that has come due to a result of the fight.

“You sure you wanna do this?,” Loki asks as he grabs your hand. You two had a plan set in motion and he was starting to get cold feet. 

“If you’re not sure about this I can do it alone,”

“I just fear you’ve gone mad,”

“Loki, we’re both mad. Absolutely batshit crazy. There’s nothing more satisfying than letting your opponent think they have you. Remember, cat and mouse baby,” you kiss his cheek before he flashes you all right into the heart of the fight and you call for Hulk and Tony to stop. They appear behind you and you all put your hands up in surrender.

“Forgive me, Captain for I have been bad,” you add some pitch to your voice and Steve just rolls his eyes at you.

“Are you actually going to turn yourself in or disappear?,”

“I would wave a white flag but all I have are the three men behind me,” you laugh at your own joke and all you can hear is the small cries of the people around you.

“Y/N, you’ve gotten yourself in so much shit you’re not even dealing with us anymore,” Clint steps forward, ready to cuff you. You wave your fingers and Hulk turns back into Bruce. You all stand tall and strong, playing the roll of an easy surrender. 

Thor shoots Loki down with a lightning bolt and he falls out onto the ground yelling out in pain. You look down at him before looking back to the team.

“What? No moves to save your dear husband?,” Wanda spat.

“Hmm,” you shrug, “We’ve done some bad things,” you smirk and Natasha comes and shoots you with a taser to make you fall out so they could make an easy arrest. You could tell your ancestors were laughing, they saw how stupid the team was. They didn’t think it was suspicious that you all easily turned yourselves over like this?

Once you all were in cuffs that subdued your powers (to their knowledge anyway) they put you on the quinjet and took you to a high security prison in the middle of the desert. You are all stripped to make sure you don’t have any other weapons on you then put into white jumpsuits and throw in different cells. But across the way, you can see Bruce and Tony, and they can see you and Loki.

“Sweetheart, what if we made the wrong move?,” Loki starts to panic once he realized he can’t use his powers. You snap your fingers and his cuffs turn off.

“I thought I told you to stop second guessing me,” you lean your head as you look through the slit in the wall back at him.

“We’ll be gone before sunrise. We’ll be back in the bunker and maybe you can fuck my brains out when we get back?,” you wink at him and a sinister smirk appears on his face.

“Maybe those two can join,” you jerk your head to the two men across the hall who were playing tic-tac-toe through the opening in the wall so they could communicate.

“Absolutely NOT!”

You laugh at his reaction and turn off the cuffs from Tony and Bruce. The guards are just as big of idiots as the team and wouldn’t even realize the connection to your cuffs was off.

“They’ll appear for routine check in a few. Once they leave they won’t be back for another fifteen minutes. That’s when we strike,” 

Tony and Bruce nod their heads and stand at attention when the guard comes by to check your cells. You’re standing there smiling and the guard gets in your face, “What’s so fucking funny?,” his gum chewing was obnoxious.

“Oh nothing,” you innocently shrug, “Just being a good girl,”

“Good girl my ass,” he rolls his eyes and puts you against the wall to do a routine check. You’re not sure where they thought you all would get shit from, yeah you could summon it, but you wouldn’t keep it on you, you’re not stupid.

Once the guard checks Loki and you hear the slamming door of the room shut and lock closed you look at the boys and you shed you guys’ white jumpsuits with your powers and create new uniforms for you all. Tony’s suit was now a chrome black while Bruce hulked out and was a darker green than normal.

“The game isn’t over boys,”

---------

The team had sat relaxed in the common area, de-stressing after finally catching you and putting you away for good. They were alive and that’s about the only thing they could thank you for.

They were all sitting on the couch on eating snacks while watching a movie on cable when the movie was cut to the news.

“Just when we thought the world was safe, it has been brought to our attention that the biggest Outlaws the world has ever seen have just broken out of a high security prison for mutants. Only being locked up a few hours ago, the prison appeared up in flames with one message that was sent to the all stations across the world from the four-,”

“Can we ever catch a fucking break?!,” Sam shouts

“Is this fucking thing on?,” your voice cuts through the TV as the news station plays your message.

“Yes, sweetheart,” Loki whispers. You all were dysfunctional villains if they’ve ever seen them but you knew how to play a good game.

“Looks like your precious Avengers have let the world down yet again,” you pout in the video, “My ancestors don’t take kindly to being subdued... so it was quite dumb to think locking me away would actually work in your favor,” 

Steve knew you were talking directly to him, he stood from the couch and got closer to the TV to watch.

“You’re like Tom Cat and I’m, Jerry Mouse. You just... can never seem to catch me,” you throw your head back in laughter and Steve punches the TV in anger, cracking it,

“You just gotta be quicker... and smarter. Remember Stevie,” your face still showing up on the screen, just distorted.

“Not everything is what it seems,”

------------

A/N: Thank you to those of you who remain active and give feedback. I’m thinking of removing tags for those who aren’t active... and those who are will obviously stay. I get it, life gets in the way, I’m a full-time college student and I work (I know people juggle things differently), and it’s not all about likes and stuff but I’d at least like to hear a little tid bit of what you guys think and one reblog, that’s all I ask.

Tags: @chonisberonica @blackreaders-assemble @babybubastis @mbaku-babygirl @majikmelanin @sideeffectsofyou @yournonlocalpoc @spideys-wife @vozit @mirajanestrauss1999 @scarletlingeries @curlyhairclub @mokacoconut @fromlia-withlove @amethyst-dreams-and-candy-canes @unicornslothfish @warmchick @huh-i-guess @meg-holland @thescarsweleave @here-for-your-bullshit @micki-smiles @plussizedwriter @valentinevirgo @blowmymbackout @posion-daisy18 @lokislilslut @lokislilcaribbeanprincess​

[harryfeatgaga]

THAT ANON REMINDING ME AGAIN ABOUT MEETING HARRY AT THE BAR.... no cause he’d be SOOOOO TOUCHYYYY like i’m thinking he’s sitting and you’re standing in front of him at first and he places a hand on your hip, rubbing his thumb against you. if you have a necklace on hed make sure to brush his fingers against your collarbone softly as he holds the chain between his fingers and compliments it. he’d be holding onto your hand for majority of the night after complimenting your nails, kissing your knuckles. maybe when a friend of yours comes over to ask you if you’re gonna go home with the group, you turn around to answer them and your back faces harry and he REALLYYY doesnt want you to leave so he stands up and wraps his arm around your waist loosely and kisses your neck before whispering in your ear “would love to spend more time with you, dove” and you know at that moment the only person you’re going home with that night is harry 😋

OHHHHHHHHHH MY GODDCHFUJFHURJFHH EM WHAT THE FUCKKKKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!! THE NECKLACE THAT KILLED MEEEE he wants a closer look so he grabs it and when he touches you WHEWWWWW and hand holding yessjdnhujnfh oh my god and def pushing hair behind your ear when it falls.........AND YESSDNHBHUFH HE WOULD ABSOLUTELY MAKE SURE YOU WERE COMING HOME WITH HIMMMMMM FUCK

[sloaneisalone]

The Barista Boy(2/?)

TW: homophobic slurs, and some bi erosia (I think I fucked up the spelling for that)

I open my door to see what’s going on and there I see the boy from Starbucks—John. He’s sitting on the floor crying, the contents of his duffel bag strewn across the floor. There was visible bruising on his face and neck, and his nose was dripping with blood, but he still managed to look gorgeous(a/n: sorry that’s morbid as hell).

“What the hell happened?” I turned to face Eliza,

“Shouldn’t we help him?” She asked,

“What would we do?” Laf asked, Hercules was the first to move, he approached John and placed a hand on his shoulder. He flinched away. I was the next to move, I walked over and helped him up, he leaned into my shoulder as I walked him into my dorm, and sat him on the couch. Laf and Herc put his things back into his bag, and brought that inside. I asked Eliza to make some tea, as I looked at him with worried eyes.

After a few hours he spoke,

“I-I’m sorry for barging in—” I interrupted,

“No, you didn’t barge in at all,” he looked scared shitless, “Do you wanna talk about what happened?” He shook his head, but still spoke,

“H-h-he—” Eliza started stroking his hair with one hand, holding an ice pack with the other.

“Shhh, you don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.” He nodded, but kept going,

“H-He f-found out I w-was...g-gay..t-then, h-he called me a f-fag and s-started hitting m-me.” I was shocked. Someone did this to him because he was gay? What the actual fuck is wrong with the world.

“Who did this to you?” I asked, my eyes filled with rage. This I wanted to kill whoever beat up John.

“T-Thomas J-Jeffers-son.” That stupid macaroni-dick-face was gonna pay. I ran out of the dorm, Eliza warning me to calm down before I did something stupid. I went down the hall, to the place John had been thrown out of; banging on the doors until my knuckle were raw. Eventually a very tired looking Jefferson opened the door and kindly asked me to “shut the fuck up,”because he needed his ‘beauty rest.’ The tall man was dressed in a short violet , silk bathrobe with flowers and dragonflies on it, his dark hair puffed out in a perfect afro.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” I shout,

“Excuse me?” Anger rises in his voice,

“You know what you did, how could you do that to John?”

“The fag got what he deserved,” I couldn’t take his rudeness anymore, I slapped Thomas directly across the face, I could see the hurt in his eyes for a , before he covered the pain with more anger.

“How can you of all people say that? After everything?”

I’m holding my boyfriend’s hand. Boyfriend. That sounds nice. We sit in an empty classroom, our legs hanging off the desks,

“Tommy?” I ask in a sing songy voice, while playing with his hair, “Why do you like me?” I had, had a crush on Thomas since the seventh grade. We’d never really been close, we just had a few mutual friends, so I was shocked when I learned he felt the same way. Thomas turned his head towards me and smiled, “Well for starters, you’re a pretty great kisser,” I giggled slightly as he placed his soft hand on mine, intertwining our fingers. He continued,“you’re handsome, and kind-”he stopped and moved his hand away from mine as he noticed someone walking into the room. My smile faded. Yes, Thomas was my boyfriend, but he wouldn’t let me tell a soul we were together. I waited for the intruder to leave, before I asked,

“Thomas, when can we tell people we’re together?” He looked at me with a serious look,

“I-I don’t know…” he trailed off, “I’m just not ready yet.” This was an excuse, we’d been seeing each other in secret for almost a year. I was fully out at that point, and I understood that it takes some people longer...but it hurt me to have to hide my feelings whenever we were out in public.

“Do you know when you will be ready?” I asked, trying my hardest to sound understanding.

“N-No I don’t know when I’ll be ready, but Alex, I do know that I love you.” He cupped my face in his hands, and closed the space between us. We broke apart after a while and I smiled,

“I love you too Tommy.”

“I swear to God, Alex. If you tell anyone about what happened that year I will fucking kill you.” I wasn’t scared of Thomas, he was all talk, or at least that’s what I thought.

“I will tell everyone our little secret, if you don’t go and apologize.” This was an empty threat, I wasn’t cruel.

“You wouldn’t dare.” I could see he was scared, he wasn’t the best at hiding his emotions.

“Fucking watch me,” with that I turned on my heel and started to walk away, but he grabbed, my hand with a sigh.

“Fine.”

————————Mini time skip back to Alex’s dorm, brought to you by Jefferson's perfect hair, cuz honestly fucking how? I’m jealous.

“Sorry I called you a f-” I shot him a death glare, “a slur and sorry I beat the shit out of you.” John still looked a bit scared, like Thomas would snap any second and hit him again; but it was a bit difficult to take him seriously in the bathrobe, I could see both Lafayette and Herc practically shitting themselves with laughter.

“O-Okay, I forgive you.” We could all tell he was lying, but no one said anything. When I felt Thomas had said enough, I escorted him out of the room, and walked him back to his own dorm,

“Fuck you, Alex,”

“I would, but I thought you were too busy fucking Madison.” His face turned bright red, I leaned near his ear and whispered with a smirk, “don’t worry, your secret’s safe with meeee.” I walked back to my room and pulled out all the board games we owned and gestured for John to pick one. His face lit up, with a childish joy. Damn that boy was cute. (A/n: if you don’t know the premise of the life game this will probably make no fucking sense, so sorry whoooops)

We ended up playing Life, and finishing the Chinese food we had leftover. We kind of just accepted John into our group without a hitch, he just seemed to fit with everyone but Eliza. They both pretended to like each other for everyone else’s sake, but it was still obvious. I’d never met someone Eliza didn’t like.

I landed on the “you got married,” square and I had trouble deciding whether to marry a dude or a chick in the game. I had never told Eliza I was bi and I wasn’t quite sure how she’d react, but at the same time I didn’t want John to think I was straight. Wait, shit. I’m with Eliza. I’m with Eliza. I’m with Eliza. But what if I wasn’t? What if I could just kiss John. I bet his lips are soft. His eyes are nice. He’s really just hot overall, like dammmmmnnnnnn. I shake my head and snap out of my funk as I grab a random person and put it in my little car piece.

“That’s a boy Alexander.” Eliza says, Jesus Christ.

“Oh, I guess it is.”

“Are you gonna change it?” There’s a slight edge to her voice.

“I mean I could, I guess I’ve never mentioned this but I’m...bisexual.” I mumbled the last part, I didn’t see why it was a big deal but some people lose their shit when I tell them. Lafayette decided to help me out when Eliza asked what I said.

“He’s bi.”

“What the hell does that mean?” I couldn’t decide if she was confused or angry.

“It means he likes chicks and dicks,” John spoke, his first time without stuttering, his words earning a chuckle from Laf and Herc. Then things got a bit intense.

“I’m not stupid. I know what it means. Alex, honey you’re not bisexual. You’re just confused.”

“Nope, pretty sure I’m bi,”

“No. You’re not.” The anger was now clear in her voice.

“It’s not even a big dea-” she cut off John,

“How can you tell me this isn’t a big deal? God, nothing ever works out for me! This is just a load of bullshit, first my sister ssays she’s a lesbian, and now I find out you’re a fag. I can’t fucking believe this.”

“Get out.” Herc said. She didn’t move.

“Get out!” I yelled. She walked out of the dorm and slammed the door. That’s when I started to cry.

[takealottodragmeawayfromreddie]

Morning!Reddie headcanons

—Winter is absolutely the best thing ever because they always wake up spooning.

—Richie will hug Eddie from behind and they’ll just lay there in their cozy cove made of sheets and pillows, warm and pure and in love.

—Richie likes to think he always wakes up first, but, actually, Eddie just likes to pretend he’s asleep so Richie will snuggle him for a little more.

—Of course, since it’s Richie, he will usually grab Eddie’s butt and stuff. And Eddie will just take it and cuddle because he lowkey loves it? And early in the morning is the only time of the day he doesn’t have to pretend he hates it? Yeah.

—Richie, obviously, notices how much he likes it. So he just leaves his hand there and everything is perfect and domestic and dreams do come true, until he, also pretending to be asleep and with the clear intention of waking Eddie up, whispers “Eds would kill me if he found out about us, hm, Mrs. K?”

—And Eddie just… do you remember that Spongebob episode when Spongebob would get into Squidward’s bed and Squidward was so sleepy that he just allowed it? And when he notices what’s going on his eyes suddenly open wide in such a memeish way? That’s Eddie’s reaction everytime Richie murmurs something like “gotta love that ass of yours, Mrs. K”.

—"DUDE, WHAT THE HELL". Sitting up and ruining all the magic bc seriously wth.

—"Oh, there you are, Eds. Sorry, same old dream I’ve been having everynight since we hit puberty".

—Eddie barely represses a psychotic tic of his right eye as Richie explodes in a uncontrollable laugh and puts his arms around him and pulls him to his chest (Eddie lowkey can’t breath and will beat the shit out of him with his clueless, bare hands if he doesn’t let go of him).

—But he doesn’t let go, he just lets him raise his head a bit so he won’t die suffocated. He’s still on top of Richie with him holding him down. And they stare into each other eyes and it’s so perfect.

—Obviously, Richie can’t see, so Eddie, trying to avoid every chance of a sappy, awkward moment happening, takes the glasses from the nightstand and roughly puts them on his face, saying something like “you look stupid trying to see without them”.

—But he’s clearly lying bc Richie looks so cute in the mornings when he makes an effort to see bc he’s to lazy to stretch out an arm to get his glasses and aAaAaAaAAAAA why is he like this Eddie is internally screaming.

—"You like me stupid", Richie smirks and Eddie just… melts. But of course he can’t admit it, so he rolls his eyes and let himself be flipped and pushed down to the bed by Richie’s weight.

—More cuddles!

—Eddie yawns and Richie just… melts. Like, so cute! And he holds him there and starts saying fluffy stuff and kissing all over his face.

—"Such a… *peck on the forehead* cute… *nuzzle on the neck* little thing… *peck on the cheek* aren’t you? *kiss on the temple* Soft… *peck on the other cheek* sleepy… *peck on the nose* boy… *peck on the lips* cute… *kiss* cute… *kiss* cute! *super hardcore and sweet smooch*

—Eddie feels in heaven. But he can’t let this damage his reputation of chaotic evil, so he puts his hand on Richie’s face, pushes him back so he can get out from under him and says “morning breath”, getting out of bed.

—He starts looking into the closet for his clothes and Richie lies down on his stomatch and whines into the pillow like a dying whale.

—"Edssss, why do you have to leave meeee"

—"I’m not leaving you, we always leave together. But it’s late and you know it. So get up".

—"But I don’t wanna go to work. It’s booooriiiing".

—"You work at the radio station because you chose it".

—"But, baby, it’s cold outside".

—"You’re a fucking child".

—"You work at a children hospital. I just prepare you for that".

—"I work at a children hospital but I’m not your babysitter".

—"That’s what you think".

—They argue until Eddie is ready and Richie finally agrees he’s getting out of bed (they have this rule that says they only cancel plans before one of them is fully dressed, so he can’t do nothing about it and he just accepts his fate as an adult).

—As Richie gets ready in front of their mirror, he usually pulls Eddie with him and wraps his arms around his waist and rests his chin on his shoulder, making him look at himself in the mirror and telling him “look at how cute that guy is! Oh, and is that devilish handsome man behind him his husband? It looks like he is!”

—Eddie just laughs and rolls his eyes. And then Richie says “just brushed my teeth. No morning breath anymore” like he won some strategy game and Eddie says “ok” and gives him a quick kiss over his shoulder before leaving the room.

—Richie always makes breakfast bc the only thing he can cook is hotcakes. Still, he’s so careless and messy that Eddie would rather do it himself.

—The thing is… they don’t have that much time. So Eddie’s boss (who is a cool guy, but he likes things being well done) calls him and Eddie lies saying he’s stuck in the traffic.

—Richie will catch up the conversation and start making street noises and scream things like “LEARN HOW TO DRIVE, ASSHOLE! OH, YEAH? YOU WANNA FIGHT? GET OFF OF THAT CAR AND FACE ME”. And Eddie tries so hard not to laugh.

—It’s all okay until Richie’s lack of attention while cooking backfires and he accidentally lands his hand on the stove and ScReAmS.

—Eddie worries about it, but, most important, he almost drops his phone and when he handles it back his boss asks for an explanation. Then diva!Richie takes the stage.

—"EDS, WATCH OUT, AN OLD LADY, OH NO, YOU’RE ON THE SIDEWALK, YOU’RE ON THE FUCKING SIDEWALK!!! OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, AM I GONNA DIE? I DON’T WANNA DIE! OH, NO, THE POOR OLD LADY! THE KIDS!!! LOTS OF KIDS EVERYWHERE, THEY ONLY WANTED TO GET TO SCHOOL, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE. Look, here comes the ambulance! *takes the phone and starts to scream to it* WEEE OOOH WEEE OOOOH! Thank God, we’re saved! OH NO THE CAR IS ON FIRE! THERE’S DEAD BODIES EVERYWHERE! WHY GOD WHY?! WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO US! WHY DID THIS HAPPEN TO US! WHY MUST THE GOOD DIE YOUNG? WHEN WILL GOD HAVE MERCY ON THESE POOR UNFORTUNATE SOULS! Myhandhurtsgoodbye". Click.

—Eddie looks ready to kill him but his poor baby burned his hand and he needs help so fanny pack powers activated you’re so in trouble Richard we’ll talk about it where does it hurts honey.

—When they take care of his hand, they sit to have breakfast. And, even when all the domestic magic is back, they’re in a bit of a hurry. So Eddie makes the mistake of telling him to eat fast and Richie fucking ROLLS UP his hotcake and starts eating it like it’s a burrito.

—"RICHIE WHAT THE FUCK YOU CAN’T EAT HOTCAKES LIKE THAT".

—"Oh, sorry *still chewing*, forgot the syrup *grabs the syrup bottle and directly puts half of its content into his mouth*“.

—”…“ *dies*

—"Want some, Eds?”

—"…“ *dies again*

—”…“ *smile full of food and syrup*

—"Beep beep, Richie”.

—Since the hospital where Eddie works is on the way to the radio station, Richie always gives him a ride.

—They cruise the town in his shining classic car with 80s music blasting on the stereo or Richie’s voice changing the lyrics of famous TV shows themes.

—Tozbraks, meet the Tozbraks, they’re the modern gay age family. From the town of Derry, Maine, they’re a page right out of gaystory🎶

—"You can’t put the word ‘gay’ in every song and pretend it fits us, Rich".

—"Oh, I can’t, Eds? I can’t? Are you sure? I can’t?“

—"Uh huh”.

—"You’re right. I should put the word 'cute’ if I want it to fit you".

—"Fuck you" *blushes while internally screams*

—When they arrive to the hospital, it’s time to say goodbye. Of course Richie doesn’t need to get out of the car for that, but he does it anyway. And they just hug and kiss at the hospital’s sidewalk, and they don’t care about what anyone could think.

—"See you at dinner, Eds", Richie says as he gets back to the car. “Love ya”.

—"Love you, too, Rich" *InTeRnAlLy ScReAmInG*

—He loves this man so much.

—And he has so many explanations to give to his boss.

[im-abanana]

-The Demon and The Angel- ch.4

Wrote the fourth chapter of this Alice x Bendy (Benlice) One-Shot collection, too. Hope you’ll like it, folks. 

AO3 link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/12736851/chapters/29045748

Oh, thank you a lot for the 800 followers, you’re all sweeties! 

Summary: Her ivory horns were what made Alice a fallen angel, and were her best natural weapon, too. But when you crash your head against a wall and get stuck, you could use some unwanted “help” from your dance partner. 

-Stuck-

Alright, maybe she hadn’t had the greatest idea ever this time.

“Dammit…” Alice weakly whined and panted to regain her precious breath, pressing her pale palms against the hard wall in front of her face and pushing against it with all her might, but nothing changed: she barely moved a single muscle, plus she failed to extract her ivory horns from the fragile plasterboard. Oh, and Bendy’s coarse laughing wasn’t helping her at all, obviously. “Shut your mouth, Bendy! This is all your fault!”.

“My fault, really? Yeah, that’s a good one, toots.” the arrogant dancer proudly smirked and lazily leaned against a wooden chair, watching the satisfying scene with interested eyes and his usual wide, smug grin. “Let me remind you what exactly happened just a minute ago, babe: you’re the one who ran towards me like a crazy bull, swinging those giant horns of yours like a weapon just because you can’t take a joke and, most important, you’re the one who got those so-called antlers deeply stuck into the wall when I dodged the attack.” the presumptuous star explained and gently rubbed his chin, sticking out his forked tongue in a funny way: revenge, sweet revenge. “Fair enough sweetheart, our dad Joey and our uncle Henry told you a long time ago to stop using those pointy things on your skull to threaten other people, because you could badly injure someone… or yourself, in this case. See what happens? Good job, Angel Cake!” he finally concluded, clapping sarcastically.

“Just wait until I free myself, I’ll tear that little cunt mouth of yours to tiny pieces.” the beautiful angel angrily swore and squirmed with more energy, perceiving a stinging sensation around her narrow shoulders and her dance partner’s laughter increasing as she pitifully dropped down on her knees for the umpteenth time, standing on all-fours and grunting in defeat. “And I can’t fucking take a joke, you say? You call throwing hot coffee at me a joke? How stupid can you be? You jackass, disgusting, foolish, retard son of a b-”.

“Woah, watch your language Alice, you’re the angel here.” Bendy shushed the irritated angelic cartoon and slyly winked, removing his white gloves and placing them aside, on the nearby table. “What would your beloved fans think about it? Those poor, innocent children…”.

“Bendy, for the last time, I’m definitely not in the best mood to joke around with you right now. My neck, head and back hurt, and I just can’t get my horns out! I’m stuck!” Alice angrily yelled and squirmed wildly, trying to back up and possibly break free from that awkward position, her ivory horns still deeply lodged in the plasterboard wall. Grunting furiously and knowing that she needed to change her strategy if she wanted to resolve the situation by herself, the fallen angel watched the short demon, who was standing (now silently) right behind her with his arms crossed, immediately noticing his naughty expression and realizing what he was looking at. “Could you please stop staring at my ass for a moment and help me, you stupid little cretin!? Or call the others, at least!”.

“What should I do? Joey, Boris and Henry left, so I can’t do anything for you, Angel Cake. Nice view from here, by the way.” Bendy smugly chuckled and lifted an eyebrow as he admired her currently defenseless body, a mischievous idea making him grin and approach the wary singer carefully. “But now that I think about it, I guess I could make our waiting a little more enjoyable, toots~” the devil maliciously licked his dry lips and two of his fingers, his other hand grabbing the soft edge of her black dress and quickly lifting the refined fabric without asking permission. “It’s the least I could do, right? Relax, baby girl~”.

Guessing his not-so-chaste intentions and gasping loudly in realization, the angelic cartoon growled and frowned, staring at the discolored wall in front of her visage and perceiving her co-worker’s wet fingers caressing her pale thighs, slowly traveling up to stimulate her off-limits areas. “Bendy, I swear to God: touch me again and I’ll murder you. As I said, I’m not in the right mood for-! M-mngh~” Alice blushed and bit back an instinctive moan, her spine arching elegantly as her partner boldly brushed a sensitive spot, ignoring the threats and snickering in satisfaction. “G-get your filthy hands off me, now!”.

“Com’on Angel Cake, don’t tell me you’re shy! We did this plenty of times backstage, after our performances, remember?” the arrogant black-haired dancer cooed and looked at her beautiful form with a pretty dumb face, hungrily drooling on the ground and sticking his forked tongue out, the temptation simply too strong for him to overcome. “And you totally loved it, right?” Bendy shamelessly added, but when his sneaky hand cupped a particular area he shouldn’t have touched, the killer look on the fallen angel’s face, and especially the frightening, dark noise that escaped from her throat, made him understand that he maybe fucked things up.

“Holy fucking Trinity, Bendy! I SAID GET OFF!” Alice literally screamed at that point and used all her strength to strike Bendy in the face with her left leg, hitting his nose and causing it to bleed copiously, black ink dripping everywhere. In the powerful process, the singer’s entire body managed to violently jerk backwards, her sharp horns destroying the remains of the wall and pulverizing that plasterboard prison: she was free, she was finally free! Oh, but not pleased at all. In fact, the young and majestic singer looked a lot more like a demon than like a flawless angel, actually.

Getting up ponderously and shaking off the grayish powder, the angelic cartoon lowly growled and walked decisively towards the poor Bendy, her pitch black orbs turning reddish for a moment as she met the terrified gaze of the tiny devil. “Bendy, my dearest.” Alice gave him a fake smile and swung her dangerous white horns, chasing after the dancing demon as he immediately ran off, screaming in pure fear and knowing he’d better retreat. “If I catch you, you’re a dead man! Get back here, you coward! I said come back!” the infuriated young woman promised, rushing in the empty corridors to catch her co-worker and preferably beat the living shit out of him. “No, listen up, I have a better idea! I’ll return the favor! I won’t kill you, I’ll simply shove my own, dry fingers up your ass! Let’s see if you like it!”.

“DAD JOEY! UNCLE HENRY! BORIS! SOMEBODY HELP MEEEE!” Bendy desperately shouted for help and literally threw himself inside his private room, rapidly locking the thick door on the inside and breathing a liberating sigh of relief as he believed it was finally over. Or so he thought: after just a moment of complete silence, the solid layer of wood that separated the scared demon from the pissed angel broke down because of a brute kick of hers, and the last thing Bendy saw before letting out a girlish scream and crashing down was Alice jumping on him with an aggressive yell. 

In the meantime, inside the nearby room, Barley let out a resigned sound as he heard those high-pitched noises coming from the changing room of the star of the show, guessing what was probably going on: troubles, blood, kicks and punches, nothing new after all. He picked a random card from stock, playing poker with his boss Charley and with his buddy Edgar, sipping his beer and rolling his concentrated eyes as another irritating scream reached his ears. “Do ya guys think he’s already dead?”.

“Pff, maybe, judging by the sound of it. Actually, I sure hope so. I can’t stand that arrogant little shit.” Charley coldly replied with poor interest and lit a cigar, not really caring about the other two characters’ conditions and focusing on the complicated game while smoking. “Not that I give a freakin’ damn about that foolish devil, that cunt girlfriend of his or that pathetic excuse of a dog.”. 

“I don’t really understand Bendy and Alice, gang. I mean, one minute they’re beating each other to death, just like now, the next they’re all cuddly and making out in a shady corner.” Edgar shrugged it off and slightly grimaced as he recalled the number of times the unaware crew caught the devil and the fallen angel kissing, scratching the smooth top of his stylized head and huffing out, giving up and putting a card on the messy table. “Oh, well. Like Joey always says: <Don’t meddle in a quarrel between a husband and his wife>, I guess.”.

“Well said, Edgar.” the other two members of The Butcher Gang nodded promptly and agreed to those wise terms, trying to ignore the desperate, muffled whines that were echoing in the whole studio and probably even outside. “Well said indeed.”.

[tellywoodtrash]

ishqbaaz 28.09.17 lb

the fake tadi isn’t turning anika on like shivaay thought it would. tai tai phisssssssss! 

fake tadi is quicklyyyyyyy turning into real tadi. 

YEAAAAAAH BABYYYYY

OH GOD WHYYYYYYYYYYY THIS FUCKING SONG COME ON LIKE THE FAKE CGI BG WASN’T BAD ENOUGH TO RUIN THE MOOD

ok ignoring for the seskiness. 

honestly the fucking bad cgi and lighting changes are making it super difficult for me to concentrate. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS THIS ☝🏽☝🏽☝🏽☝🏽☝🏽☝🏽☝🏽☝🏽

BILLU PLEASE!!!!! HAATH SE BHI AAGE KABHI BADHEGA??????? 

ouff yuck forehead kissing like a brother is not what i meant. 

OH HALLELUJAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YAS BILLU! GET IT!!!!!!!!!! 

aaaaaaaaaaand KLPD. 

“shivaay singh oberoi ki shaadi ho rahi hai” 

and for the how many’th time???? like, at this point, it’s not even news. tu har do teen mahine shaadi karta hai. 

pft billu is greaaatly overestimating his market value. 

“swayamvar” “somvaar??” “swayamvar!”

anika’s is like fuck you, you just killed my lady boner, imma go sleep. 

nope, too late to do damage control, shivaay. girl’s like byeeeeee. 

LMAO THE FAKE FOX NEWS - BOX GOSSIPS 

whooooooo the fuck are these girls??? where were they before his three (four??? i’ve lost count at this point) other marriage attempts??? 

oh boy. who this with the omnious hand tattoo? it’s a trishul (for shiva) too. obsessed fangirl????

fuck it’s so easy to just smuggle yourself into this fucking house inside some item. pehle dhol tha, abhi carpet. like... come on. 

what do you mean it gets too late???? WHO ARE YOUUUUUU??? 

whyyyyyyyyy is khanna in charge of everything from security to electricity to decoration to shivaay’s meetings to god knows what else??? LIKE... HIRE MORE PPL, SHIVAAY. HONESTLY. 

catering ki taraf se ho toh yeh decoration ka kaam kyun kar rahi ho??? 

yuck the decorations are so tacky. and the large pictures of them, god. so embarrassing. 

pinky, maybe if you actually asked for forgiveness instead of just... demanding it, or taking it as a right....??? 

dadi kuch zyaaada laad nahi kar rahi pinky par??? 

MY GOD HIRE MORE PPL, KHANNA IS JUST ONE PERSON

snort, i’m loving this new more jokey and familiar khanna. 

“sir, aapko mere pe bharosa nahi hai?????” “TUJHPE NA, KISI KO BHAROSA NAHI HAI YAHAN PAR.”

lmaoooooooooooooo. toh phir naukri pe rakha kyun hai isse? for his cute puppy dog eyes and videography skillz? 

lmaooooo is it just meeee or was there bhar bhar ke snark in khanna’s smirky “shaadi mubarak ho” hee hee 

anyway, he made shivaay laugh, so guess his job is still safe despite being a colossal fuckup. 

“pagal hai yeh khanna. kaam chod ke sab achche se karta hai.” 

aaaaaand there’s khanna’s character sketch for you in one sentence. 

OUFF OH WHO THISSSSSSSS

pfffffft “zindagi ka sabse bada din”. honestly, after the second time, it starts to lose it’s charm. 

god what new chore does dadi have for shivaay now

ooooh, i like shakti’s dupatta/stole/whatever 

LMAO WHAT, DADI IS A BADSHAH FAN HAHAHAHA

even pinky is ecstatic at that. wow. who knew oberois had such mainstream and... “youth” oriented taste. 

ok whatever, fwding this stupid little plug. 

must these three always make a dramatic entrance like this together, at every function???? matlab, apna hi ghar hai, there’s no need to be soooo dramatic. 

the ladkewaale’s side is little overpopulated no? 

EXCUSE ME WHO ARE THESE RANDOS BRINGING ANIKA??? weren’t omru supp to be on anika’s side and be with her?????? THE FUCK.

billu you’re going to sprain your neck if you stretch it anymore to look at her. 

lmaoooooooooooooo bechaara

hahahaha rudra’s face like “bhaiyya could you chill and not be a damn loser for 5 seconds pls.”

hahahaha this poor munchkin. dadi is cockblocking to the maxxxxxxxxxx. 

LMAO OM’S FACE. EVERYONE’S JUST LIKE BRO COULD YOU CALM DOWN A SEC

“kyaaaaa kar rahe ho?” 

no really billu. the fuck you doing? 

“she’s looking GORGEOUS. bhaabi’s killing it bhai! tabaaahi lag rahi hai!”

lololol, abhay’s putting in salt in shivaay’s wounds. 

LMAO OMRU HAAAAAAAAAATE HIM SO MUCH

lo, haldiiiiiiiii bhi nahi aayi. in logon ka kuch time pe hota bhi hai?

please om, you’re not exactly loving abhay either. don’t think we’re not noticing all the stink eyes you’re shooting him. 

“woh ddlj ka raj malhotra banne ki koshish kyun kar raha hai???”

pfffffffffft. no but truly, is begaani shaadi mein abhaay kuch zyaada hi deewana ban raha hai. 

waaah, bhai apna artist bhi hai. watch outtttt omkara! 

lolllllllllll these assholes. 

such attractive assholes though. my boys! *squishes them all together*

woooop, sabse pehle maa. oh boy. 

great, dadi’s emotionally blackmailing billu into it. 

omRu and shivaaaaaaay NOT HAPPY. 

LMAO K3G TITLE TRACK WHAT NONSENSE

OMFG OM PLEASE STOP WITH THE NAINO KE BAAN. KUCH TOH DIPLOMACY DIKHAO. 

lolololol billu is soooooooo mad at dadi for doing this to him

IS PINKY FINALLY ON THE GOOD SIDE OR NOT???? WHO THE FUCK WERE ALL THE PHONE CALLS TO? WHAT ABOUT SVETLANA? IS THIS NEW HIDDEN WEIRDO IN THE HOUSE THANKS TO HER??? I NEED TO KNOW ALL THIS BEFORE SUCCUMBING TO MY FEELZ ABOUT HER. 

that one crookedass tika. 

that sorted itself out in the next shot! 

billu’s stone face tho. sigh. 

OMFG WHAT BAAAT WITH SHIVAAY BITCH JUST SPIT IT OUT ALREADY

tej and shakti cuteness. 

eeeeeeeeeeee. my boyssssssss. 

fuck offffffffff, why so adorbzzzzzzzzzz. i love you shitheads so much. 

why’s everyone just putting it in the same three spots. itni badi... ok not badi.... lekin itni body padi hai uski, put it other places too? 

billu is now throwing tantrum about wanting to haldi up wife. 

wife’s reaction: 

ahaaa wife is just as utaavli over here. these two have zero chill. 

lol billu just got smacked over the head. 

om, you’ve been pacing the length of your room coz you haven’t seen YOUR wife. tu toh rehne hi de. 

lol abhay has a nickname for om: ghalib. 

aaaaaaaaand rudra just got haldi bombed. 

OMG THE MURDER IN RUDRA’S EYES LOLOLOL RUN FOR YOUR LIFE ABHAY

shivaay’s reactions are the best hahahahahaha: 

pffffffffffffffffffffffffft. 

masha’Allah @ the faces of this show honestly. 

i hate this weirddddd low pitched version of lafzon ka rishta

awwww, sahil having complex. 

shaktiji here to make pinkyyyy feel better 

i’m so glad to see them happy. i know pinkyyyy was a bitch to the infinite degree, but i can never fully hate her coz my scorpio heart knows what it’s like to be a jealous possessive crazy asshole. 

rudraaaaaa finalllyyyy got one in on abhayyyyy 

OMG WHO IS THIS TRISHUL WAALI 

SOMEONE COME GET MY BABY SAHIL AND INCLUDE HIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

ok badshah is here and i can’t handle such naach gaana so fwding, as much as i love him 

what nonsense, he’s not even performing for real, just lip syncing pffffffffffft

ahaaaaaaaaaaa billu’s managed to sneak over to the other side of the curtain using badshah as a cover! 

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAS SNEAK OFF MY BBS!

kasam has been invoked. 

“humaari zindagi mein kuch bura nahi hoga. sirf achcha hi achcha hoga.”

don’t make promises you can’t keep, bro. 

but you guys cute. so go on. 

ghoongat waali bai mistook abhay for shivaay. methinks abhay might be instrumental in coming to rescue in this situation??? 

“kal raat se tumhe dekha nahi hai. it was the hardest day of my lifeeeeeeee.” 

so overdramatic. hey, remember when she left you for 3 months???? 

“main chahta tha ki main apne hone waaali biwi ko khud haldi lagaoon.”

TOH KARO NA JALDI. WE’VE BEEN WAITING FOR LIKE A FUCKING YEAR NOW BITCHHHHHHHHHH

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS FINALLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

GET IT BABIESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!

omg omg omg he’s finally gonna say it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FUCKING DADI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ok i honestly am done with dadi and her interference. woman, get a hobby!

oh suddenly ppl care about sahil. pffffffffft. aaaaj tak toh itna concern nahi dekha. 

theory: abhay is going to take on sahil responsibility and endear himself to shivika. 

yuck shaadi outfits are so grosssssssssssss aaaaaaaaaah whyyyyyyyyyyyyy. 

omki still hot as ever though. not even being trussed up in copper foil can take away his handsomeness. 😍😍😍😍