#the nanny? more like the wife 😂

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Fics that Live in My Mind, Rent Free (Pedro's Version) - Part 2

Welp! It seems there are link and tag limits? Who knew? Not this newb 😂😂 When I said that I've read so many good fanfics, I really meant it. Again, below the cut is a continuation of the list of some of my fave Pedro character fanfics that I've read on this site - ones I think about and revisit often. These are all fics I should have/would have reblogged if only I wasn't so weirdly nervous about it; in 2024 we will muster up some courage and reblog (it will be slow, probably, but I promise I will be trying!). This is a good time for me to also say that one of the reasons I am motivated to step out of my comfort zone on this is because of the genuine joy every comment/reblog/like has brought me this year as a new writer - thank you all from the bottom of my heart for the kind reception on anything I have ever posted. 🥹 ilysm 😘

Anyways, we press forward (Part 1 of Rent Free PPCU fics can be found here):

Din Djarin (The Mandalorian, GOAT)

Of Shadows and Roses by @the-scandalorian (Bodyguard!Din x Royalty!Reader)

All Mine by @mellowswriting (Possessive!Din after Reader uses herself as bait)

Narcissus by @bits-and-babs (Armour/mirror sex)

Looking out for you by @beskarandblasters (Jealous!Din after Reader uses herself as bait)

Cherry Liqueur by @decembermidnight (Reader teases Mando in public)

Breaking in the New House by @beskarandblasters (I love Husband!Din and Wife!Reader fics)

Javier Pena (Narcos)

Sweet Dreams by @javiscigarette (Javi can't sleep)

Phone Sex...amiright? by @tightjeansjavi (Reader calls Javi at work)

Sharing is Caring by @ezrasversion (Corrupt DEA Agent!Javi, Mafia AU!Joel Miller, Reader Threesome)

The Saint, the Sinner, and the Devil by @joelsgirl (Corrupt DEA Agent!Javi, DBF Mafia AU!Joel Miller, Reader Threesome)

MIA by @itsharleystuff (Jealous!Javi with Undercover!Reader)

Surprising Javi P with a Lingerie Set by @swiftispunk

Not here...not now by @gracieispunk (Reader visits Javi at work)

Bunny by @whatsnewalycat (Sex Phone Operator!Reader; Part 2 is great too!)

Ease by @javiscigarette (Javi takes care of Reader after a bad day)

Joel Miller (TLOU)

Say It Right, Peeping Neighbour, and Right Place, Right Time by @chaotic-mystery (All the DBF and BFD fics are amazing; these are my fave)

Quickie by @joelscruff (This falls in the middle of the Boyfriend's Dad series, but it's the first one I read and I was hooked!)

That Funny Feeling by @bluebeary-jay (Joel loves pet names 🥹)

I've Got Lust on My Tongue by @itgetsdark-x (Bratty reader a la Maddy Perez)

The Babysitter, Part 1 by @proxima-writes (There's a Part 2 as well!)

Under the Table by @toxicanonymity (A lot of good Joelkemons, but Speakeasy is a classic and maybe my fave?)

Online Friends, Sticking it to the PTA, and Caught Sunbathing by @walkintotheriveranddisappear (All of Emma's Joel fics are really hot [honestly you can't go wrong], but these are my faves)

Late Night Smoke by @bettercallwillow (Dbf smoking. sigh)

Calling Joel Daddy by @inkedells (I honestly love it when authors bold the dirty talk 🤭)

Gimme What I Want and In the Next Room by @atticrissfinch (The masterlist is some of the hottest Joel fic, if I may say so; these are my faves)

An Open Window by @velvetmud (Joel being a peeping tom; I also always hope for a sequel to this one!)

Crave by @toxic-seduction (Part 2; Reader finds Joel in the QZ)

Good Luck Charm by @javiscigarette (Joel watches the football game)

Ravish by @psychedelic-ink (Webcam Model!Reader; Part 2 is also incredible!)

I Know it When I see It by @bageldaddy (Pornstars!Joel and Readers. This series has me and everyone else, I think, in a chokehold. Reading, as well, the writer's thoughts and feelings about the porn industry and the care put into the characters is such a joy and makes the fic that much more rich)

Chaser series by @livingemkayde (Nanny!Reader and a love triangle; not finished but so good I'm happy to wait forever)

Right my Wrongs by @chloeangelic (Father in Law!Joel)

In A Feud with Her Neighbour by @proxima-writes (Read this delicious fic and the bonus scenes will be the icing on top)

Kiss and Tell by @toxic-seduction (Stepdad!Joel and mom goes away for the weekend)

Peaches and Cream by @javiscigarette (Joel buys reader peaches)

Didn't Cha Know by @chloeangelic (The Joel Reader has been pining for is her boyfriend's brother)

Gif to breakup the text block:

Camgirl by @phuckinphia (Another Camgirl but this time she's Sarah's friend 🫣)

The Right Wrong Number by @proxima-writes (Sarah's soccer coach!Reader)

Nightmares by @fruispunk (QZ!Reader has nightmares that Joel hears and mistakens for something else)

Damage Done by @bluebeary-jay (Joel accidentally triggers Reader; mind the tags. Heavy angst, heavy topic that is beautifully written)

Yes, Mr. Miller by pedropascallme (Babysitter!Reader, Part 2 Thank You, Mr. Miller is also excellent)

How Long series by @gracieheartspedro (Link is to Part 1; series is complete and wonderfully hot and emotional. Reader's boyfriend Tommy is a cheat😢)

Francisco "Catfish" Morales (Triple Frontier)

Fictional Death by @psychedelic-ink (Frankie comforts Reader)

Well Fed by @the-ginger-hedge-witch (Frankie is HAPPY 🥹)

Forest Ranger AU by @the-ginger-hedge-witch (I'm not an outdoorsy person but this AU makes me wish I was)

It's Always the Quiet Ones by @thot-of-khonshu (Frankie surprises Reader)

Pero Tovar (The Great Wall)

Kinktober 2022 - Breeding by @moralesispunk (Guard!Pero and Royalty!Reader)

Bodily Exchange by @absurdthirst (Mafia AU!Pero and daughter of mafia boss Reader)

Damnation or Salvation by @absurdthirst (Pero is sent to retrieve Reader)

Dying Wish by @absurdthirst (Pero makes Reader's father a promise; okay at this point, just all of Keri's Pero fics 🤭)

Marcus Moreno (We Can Be Heroes)

Beat Poetry on Amphetamines by @psychedelic-ink (Marcus comes home hurt)

[agendabymooner]

she's everything... and he's just mick ! mick s. x ofc (filipino!nanny!ofc)

summary: in the first race of the season, the vettels made their appearance as a family of three (or four) as kimi vettel debuts as the newest vettel of the grid and a mick schumacher fan. OR let me introduce barbara elisandra 'barbie' blanco - the woman that the vettel couple fostered for years who now takes care of the two year old boy alongside kimi's uncle mick.

content warning: smau + article. quality kimi vettel (oc) content, some hater getting ratio'd, lewis is a retired king (yes king get that rest), everyone loving kimi, barbie and mick = barbie and ken, three racing team admins fighting on the comment section, drivers also fighting in the comment section (ate = term of endearment)

note: i told y'all i'm gonna continue on with the kimi vettel/crazy rich wife saga 😭 and to all of the users who made my favourite f1 fics— i see you 👀 i’m here and i’m lurking and i’m enjoying

masterlist

barblanco posted a story !!!

tagged mickschumacher, belongvettel

liked by barblanco, georgerussell63, lewishamilton

mercedesamgf1 to answer your question: YES, we got our new mercedes ambassador not one- but TWO mercedes cars. uncle mackie said to get him one, but uncle toto said make it double✌️

lewishamilton those are some nice whip, kimi! you don't mind if you take them for a spin with roscoe, do you? 🐶🥶 liked by mercedesamgf1

mercedesamgf1 kimi has a lot of furry friends, but the vettels said there's always room for one more!

user1 as we said: BEST VETTEL IN THE GRID

user2 mickschumacher is slowly transforming kimi vettel into a mini mick schumacher and i am here to sit and admire 🥰

mercedesamgf1 like father, like son 🤗

georgerussell63 still upset he wouldn't let go of mick 🙂 liked by mercedesamgf1

mercedesamgf1 there's always a next time george!

mickschumacher look at my boy!!! ❤️🤍 liked by mercedesamgf1

belongvettel we started seeing double when he wore that race suit 😅 thank you so much for your warm welcome! kimi definitely loved being around you all and we're looking forward to attend a couple more rounds! 😍 liked by mercedesamgf1

mercedesamgf1 anything for our newest favourite vettel!!!

tagged belongvettel, scuderiaferrari, mercedesamgf1

liked by barblanco, mickschumacher, landonorris

user1 how many outfit changes did he have to go through this week what 😭😭

user2 i think some photos were taken in different days 🤔

user3 bel's nightmare is seeing him in a race suit and a powered car 😂 makes me wonder how it went for the first few days

user4 i'm looking forward to seeing the vettels' gridwalk interview!!

f1 us too! 🥰

scuderiaferrari his name is KIMI and VETTEL for a reason f1

redbullracing ur so silly 🤪

mercedesamgf1 no you two are 🤣 scuderiaferrari redbullracing

user5 why are these teams fighting in the comment section?

landonorris he'd look nice on a papaya suit tbh

mickschumacher nah uh

georgerussell63 absolutely not.

maxverstappen1 look at him! can't wait to have a rbr sebastian 2.0 in the grid

mickschumacher ❌ wrong try again ❌

carlossainzjr false news max ❌

landonorris you couldn't be any more wrong lad ❌

charles_leclerc i disagree verstappen ❌

alex_albon belongvettel which team do you think kimi would compete for?

belongvettel none of them because seb won't take him racing on such dangerous places 🙂

mickschumacher boooooo that's not mercedes 👎

tagged belongvettel, barblanco, ginaschumacher

liked by landonorris, georgerussell63, estebanocon

ginaschumacher i actually came to see barbie and kimi but maybe mom went to see you? 😺

mickschumacher 😑

estebanocon its getting so obvious mick 😭

user1 what is getting obvious??? estie???

landonorris s-tier simping tbh 🙃

user2 y'all telling me mick is simping for kimi's nanny? 😏

user3 seb's about to act up frfr 😉

belongvettel my two boys!!! liked by mickschumacher

user4 HER TWO BOYS??? MICK REALLY IS A VETTEL 😍

barblanco you did sooooo good getting those points, mick! (i'm only learning about f1 please don't be mad) ❤️👏 liked by mickschumacher

mickschumacher thank you, liebe! i'm sure seb and i will be able to teach you more about it!

user5 no because it really is obvious 😺

user6 reading the fast lane daily article, i agree that she lives up to her name barbie bc she really can do anything 😻 i dont blame u for liking her liked by mickschumacher

user7 "liked by mickschumacher" LMAO OBVIOUS MUCH?! this man is giving "wahpsssshhh" energy fr

[gurugirl]

Imagine harry and his wife hiring cute shy yn as a full time nanny but she ends up being a little plaything for the couple when their kids is not around

You make me laugh 😂 Okay if you don't like it then never mind 😂

BUT just imagine the wife watching her hot husband with the nanny and what if he like, started liking y/n more and the wife gets jealous and is just sitting there watching Harry fuck the other woman and he's really getting into it and he's forgotten all about his wife while y/n is just going wild on his cock 🤔 Hmmm... could be a super angsty and hot one shot and if you want Y/n to have harry to herself we could make that happen once the wife decides she can't get over the threesome and keeps imagining Harry with y/n (even though maybe it was the wife's idea...). Just a thought... I think I'm gonna put this into the drafts anyway. 😎

xoxo

[honestlyyoungtyphoon]

Sovieshu's regression chapter 1 review

It opens with Sovieshu visiting the ghastly hollow western palace that used to vibrate with liveliness. He enters the Empress'bedroom that had a portrait of Navier. He says

"I'm here, Navier." 🥹 Imma cry

He regularly talks to Navier's portrait despite not having any response. He talks about his daily mundane things to her picture.

Today it starts with Sovieshu talking about Marcus Carl's grandchildren cutting of Carl's beard. 🤣 Reminds me of triplets from the "Brave" movie. Carl was exasperated but couldn't be mad at his grandkids either.

He talks to the picture for four hours until it was time for dinner. Marcus Carl comes to check on him and take him to his bedroom.

He had his dinner with him cooked by Marcus Carl's own cook. They joke about it too. Their friendship is so heartwarming 🥺 Everyone needs a Marcus Carl as a friend. Though sometimes he acts as Sovieshu's nanny especially when Sovieshu doesn't know when to stop things 😂 and Sovieshu also stops when Carl nags too much.

Carl tells him not to visit Navier's portrait and Sovieshu tells him not to mention it again. Then he takes out the watch the late Dean gave him. It was a family heirloom that the late Dean gifted him. Sovieshu tells Carl that he cherished the friendships that he developed with people. Looks like he got more friends in later life. Good for him.

Sovieshu then wishes he could go back in time when things were better with Navier. Especially their crown prince and princess days. He also mentions that they both relied on each other when they became new emperor and empress. 🫂 Imma cry again

He later tells his biggest regret was the divorce day, cause that was the last moment Navier was still his wife. 😭

After taking a shower, he goes back to sleep and imagines Navier is calling for him behind the bed curtain. He probably imagines it every night. Did Navier used to do that before? 🤔 I'm leaning towards yes.

Then the clock ticks... Dun dun dun

Sovieshu is in the courtroom. He first thinks it's a dream cause he dreamt of being in the courtroom before. Sometimes in the dream, the people can't see him and he runs around like a ghost (Imagine the Harry potter scene where people couldn't see Harry in the court scene)

But something about this feels different to him. The air, atmosphere, people's gaze feels more real to him. He sees Navier standing. He wanted to call her name and extend his hand towards her but saw her lips pressed which meant she was angry. Good to know he's scared of her angry self 😂

Her parents are teary eyed like before and her friends are sad. The high priest is looking furious. He was against the divorce, as we all know. Sovieshu keeps looking to and fro (especially at Navier) and was confused. He also sees Rashta standing behind him and smiles at him when he looks at her, which surprised him. Cause the last time he saw her, Rashta was hurling curses at him. Lol

The watch ticks again and Sovieshu takes out the watch in confusion. Cause despite making sound, the hands in the watch weren't moving. Navier looks at him being disappointed, cause she mistakenly thinks that Sovieshu is looking at the watch to hurry up the divorce 😞. She was hurt.

Then high priest asks Navier if she accepts the divorce and asks her again. Because he wanted her to say no. But before Navier could say anything, Sovieshu speaks up. He basically shouts, "I don't agree!"

Everyone including Navier was surprised. The high priest asks him if he's really protesting his own divorce? Cause he looked like a crazy weirdo 🗿

But Sovieshu says yes. He thinks that even though it's a dream, he still wants to stop the divorce (he thinks it's a dream, not realising it's real). He then glares at Birdface that was sitting in the courtroom. He remembers bridface's diva entrance in the past.

Then he approaches the priest asking him that as the priest hasn't agreed/declared the divorce yet, that means Sovieshu is still married to Navier, right? He was so desperate about it. 🥹

End of chapter one.

I really enjoyed it. The tone really matches with the main story and flows well. Also has good rating so far. Don't let antis spam the ratings.

I can't wait for the second chapter! It ended in a cliff hanger. If I didn't know ending I'd have combusted. Hahaha. Go read it! It free on YONDER in English translation.

[f1stuffblog]

Ok this is an interesting development....With a half year old baby at the time.

I feel like Manu's retirement would not be far at this point if they decided for Ani to play handball again...and Nubel should reportedly return from Stuttgart in 2025 🤔🥲

But I have a different point to make, with all I have read about her and them together.

1.It's nice she decided to handle it all, despite she could stay at home comfortably ( as many people attack her, that it is all she wanted and did with Nina as well!).

2. May seem as not caring about baby ( I can see the comments like that coming), but as I handball nerd I can say that second league handball is not that difficult and very well manageable,since many players work or study at the same time ( same as Ani did). That is probably less time consuming than any other job. They usually train in the morning while Bayern has trainings in the afternoon. Also many of the away games are near Munich and Regensburg is only hour away. Also happy mother = happy child, they say ?

3. An objective truth is that she is very talented player( I would say even more than her brother), she has very good vision and precise hand. You don't score 71 goals in 25 games,If you don't have it. She was clearly her team's best player in 2022-23 before baby. If she focused only in Handball and nor having a serious injury, she could have been surely playing 1st Bundesliga by now.

4. This is such a positive sign for all woman that motherhood is not a burden, it does not stop you from fulfilling your dreams and being active mother, if you have a great man by your side. Not to mention it is amazing to see everyone around her being supportive of that, because that will need lot of logistics. It is nice to see a man as successful as Manu to support his wife doing whatever she wants ! ( Also something haters said before !)

5.I am preety sure Marita is a very handy grandmother and around a lot and while she lives in Munich she will surely be involved in this a Goat a handball player and a baby project and can help for 2-3 hours a day, if needed or take care If they are both away sometimes. Also I think Regensburg will do maximum to make it easy and smooth and she surely can take day or two off if needed, since even 50% Ani or sometimes missing games due to Luca, will be an update for the team on Left wing.

6. That clearly does not mean they don't love that little one more than anything and are career focused ( as people already said about it on few comments under article). It just means that can have family and careers. It's 2024 and this is a new normal which does not mean little one will grow up with nannies and those 2 surely will be very handy parents.

Maybe bit more complicated but honestly that's Manu he is a perfect example of complication mixed with geniality 😁😂

7. I love this transformation,despite she will surely be hated also for that. BUT THIS woman is becoming a slaying champion of woman power from a naive little girl, many people called her... There have been a lot said about this relationship, they never reacted and they are here, married with a baby. She now has a baby ( Manu wanted for a long time) and a career......and I love that more than with anyone, because that's to all the haters face ❤️ It is a strange feeling of satisfaction there in all honesty as a fan who only wanted the best for Manu since day one of this relationship.

That will those people say now about the woman they called a golddiger, who does not even want to play and fakes an injuries ? There were stupid ageist remarks about 14 years age gap as if that was their problem ! She proved during the time to be focused, very resilient despite all injuries and ambitious. And here she comes= independent, focused on her goal and excited to play again ! She clearly has a best sparring to practice over summer, so she will do great job😉 game over for haters 🖕🏻

8.You know she never did anything to attract attention in this relationship imo. As we all know Manu wants his privacy. It gave me a lot of respect for her to be honest. I saw it as a great proof of her not being like people say, because she was kind of little influencer before. She never used the attention because she dates Manu, never posted with him, never being spotlight hunter, not showing to everyone, who she is with. I started sceptical as many people, I have to admit, but that passed away long time ago. Do not forget Manu is a great human after all and I doubt he will marry anyone without values to match his own.

Well the attention thing will most likely, nicely change because she will absolutely proudly just smash thaaaaat Neuer on her jersey and believe me people will care 😍 That will be most followed 2nd ligue player on planet I swear 😂😂😂 And She will slay that, I am telling you 🙏🏻

10.Would love to see Bunkerladies in Bundesliga soon and she can 100% help that 💪🏻Despite people calling her mediocre =they just don't have a clue 😂

They are the most lowkey IT couple on the planet, but Neuers are on 🔥🔥🔥 She proves to fit to Manu as a glove daily this woman !

[bisluthq]

All this talk about Ryan and Blake is making me realize why they are such good friends with Taylor. Ryan in specific. Him and Taylor as a couple would be a real we love money duo.

Also I remember that when Blake posted a photo of her in chiefs gear or something, people thought it was a bit weird in the caption she was like it's my first fun outing in years or something like that. As if she hasn't had a night off since the kids

Ryan and Taylor would never work as a couple lol because they are both the Rich Man lol and they actually have very similar personalities. This just reminded me that a few Chiefs players mentioned that Taylor was giving advice and asking questions about like why they’re using specific plays/strategies lmao which I believe she did and does and will continue to do and it’s the same as Ryan butting in (but more random even because dafuq does Taylor Swift know about pro football 💀) so I can’t imagine them ever working like as a couple lol. He wants a wife and she tbh wants a wife too.

they do both love money tho that’s true and is why they can easily provide for their wives 😂💀

I think Blake making jokes about Chiefs gear is overthinking her trad wife role lol like she does go out and she does party (with her friends and with Ryan) and she works tbh so no she doesn’t wait to have one fun night in years. There are some trad wifey vibes going on as we’ve said but not to the extent that she doesn’t get time off.

Also fwiw unlike Ballerina Farm lady I think she has a lot of help (as she should because they can afford it). They’ve said before they don’t use nannies much but she’s been papped with what certainly look like nannies and they very actively have never said they don’t have nannies at all - they dance around it and say jokes about how their parents help and Taylor is “an expensive babysitter” etc but the dancing around to me is them trying to be relatable lol (which is also SO weird to me when celebs do because most upper middle class people have help at least when the kids are little especially if there are several kids and ESPECIALLY when both parents work? Like why be weird about it lmao? You don’t have to be Ryan Reynolds levels of rich to pay someone to come fetch your kids from preschool and entertain them for an afternoon while you’re at work lol like it’s really not THAT hectic of a luxury? The alternative is full day daycare? And middle class people - not upper - use babysitters sometimes? Like the only people who don’t use any paid help for looking after kids are legit unable to afford it even as a luxury - which is not something to be ashamed of but isn’t the situation here or even for people with comfortable middle class jobs? Or people who are very culty like the Ballerina Farm people lol. But other than that idk most people with some disposable income get some help in lol so idk why celebs get so weird about it).

The one celeb who was super normal about it and I really liked the vibe of was Keira Knightley who advocates a fair amount for parental leave and also like for accessible childcare in the UK and she has said several times she does so from a position of immense privilege. She’s said like she can afford a lot of help, which has allowed her to be a good mum and also keep working (and she enjoys her career), but she thinks it’s fucked that childcare is so expensive and that many women are forced to compromise their careers, which they might also be passionate about or enjoy, simply because they can’t afford enough childcare. That’s a cool position to take. Blake and Ryan kind of acting like they don’t have help/much help is 🙄 and even more 🙄🙄 was Gigi who said she’d NEVER use a nanny in kind of a judgy way and then decided to go back to work so obviously got nannies lmao.

[seitmai]

“Sounds like a wife. Do I get to fuck them? Does she talk back to me?” Roman shakes his head no, wanting to say more, but doesn’t want to risk his job. He had the perfect person to help Lloyd with his little problem. “Where does one find an au pair?”

This made me laugh so hard 😂

Attention was everything when it came to children. If you said no, and this was apparently an emergency, what would happen to this child? Every child deserves a good life.

I felt this! 🥺

As a former au pair and occasionally still babysitter and nanny, I'm very excited for more of this

With Your Touch, Part 1

Summary: You were supposed to be living a normal life. Perfect boyfriend, just graduated college, and ready to start your new life. Until you met him. Brooding and imposing unless his daughter is around. You knew nothing about babies, but he knew less. Tension builds, feelings flare up, but are they just because he looks extremely sexy when he's soft? Could it be because you are falling for this princess of a baby girl before him? Is it because when he's in town you're too close? The money is good, and yet his attention is better.

Pairings: Lloyd Hansen X Reader

Rating: mild

Warnings:  language, 18+ ONLY

Word Count: 4.1K

Series Masterlist

*dividers created by @firefly-graphics

Lloyd scowls as he watches the scene in front of him. The crease between his brows is extra deep. He hates working in the field almost as much as he hates watching it. Idiots. He was surrounded by incompetent idiots.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” His fist slams on the table. How many shots have to be fired before they secure their target. “He’s right fucking there! Shoot his ass!”

“Lloyd,” a timid man says behind him, and Lloyd’s eyes never leave the monitors. “Mr. Hansen?”

“I don’t want to do this myself, but I fucking will! Levinson, get ready to go!” More rounds of bullets, and still the target was missed. “What the fuck is this?”

“Lloyd!”

His body goes rigid as he turns to look at the small man who is shivering. Eyes downcast to the floor so he doesn’t look at the towering man. “Why the hell are you addressing me?”

“We have a problem.”

“No, shit, Sherlock. I have two teams of mercenaries after one target, and he’s not been shot. What the fuck else could be wrong?” He leans over a bit looking at the man. “Well?”

“Who the hell brought a baby?” Ari asks, staring down at a pitiful little carrier. An envelope beside the small bundle, and her bright green eyes stare up at the large man. “This isn’t bring your daughter to work day,” her face cracks a moment as she searches his face. Lips puckering out before a scream radiates through the makeshift office. “Make it stop!”

“Where the fuck did a baby come from?” Lloyd snaps a finger at another man to take over the original issue at hand. He just needs the target killed, and he can go home for a bit. “What is this?”

Ari’s hands slap on the side of his head covering his ears, but his foot tilts the carrier to rock it a bit, but still she wails. Seeing how no one attempts to help out, or get the baby to stop, Lloyd assumes this is something he’s going to have to take care of. What else was new? Rolling his eyes in annoyance, he leans down to grab up the letter. Crumpling it up before looking down at the baby. “Mother fucker.”

Your fingers run over the empty shelves in your dorm room. Graduation has finally happened, and now it is time to leave your mark on the world. Your father didn’t bother to show up for your graduation because why would he? He never showed up personally in your life. Not really. He always made sure that everything was paid for though. It could be worse, right?

You try not to complain about your father, or your family. You had more than most and should be grateful. But then some people had attention. Sighing, you grab up your bag, and look towards the door.

“Chase,” whispering, you walk over to him, and lay your head on his chest. “I didn’t hear you come in.”

“I don’t know why you feel so attached to this dorm room, honey.”

“Because it was my home,” you’re sure he didn’t fully understand, which was okay, you never bothered to explain. You kept your family dynamics quiet. He never asked why you were so quick to visit with his family for the holiday, just enjoyed you being there.

His warm arms wrap around you, and he holds you in a tight embrace. He wasn’t quite comfort, but he is sweet. He means well, and did what he could for the information that you provided to him. But this dorm room was the closet you had to a home. You had good memories here. Friends that were more like family, and now it’s gone.

You groan when the stupid sound of your absent father’s ringtone sounds off. Maybe he is actually calling to congratulate you for wasting his money on a degree that he deemed pointless. He. It probably wouldn’t matter what you did, it’d never be good enough for him.

“You gonna get that?”

“Do I have to?” You complain looking up at Chase. His mouth lifts to the side, and he nods his head. He is right. You should talk to him and quit hiding. You didn’t know what he was going to say or do. “I’ll be waiting in the car.”

“So the kid is yours?” Ari looks down at the car seat, watching the little baby cry, no one attempting to soothe or comfort her. Lloyd squats down and rubs his thumb over her cheek, and she struggles to breathe from her tears. “Are you going to hold it?”

“Can you stop referring to my daughter like she’s a thing?”

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” Ari answers sarcastically. “Then pick her up. What is her name?”

“Clara told me to name her. She didn’t bother naming her. What…what do I do?” He looks up at his friend, showing the tiniest bit of emotion. “I don’t know anything about babies.”

“Start by holding her.”

“You hold her,” Lloyd is a lot of things but nurturing is far from one of them. He was a man that didn’t make mistakes, but clearly, he messed up somewhere. Of all the women he had been with only one was he stupid enough to knock up. But the way Lloyd is staring at her would suggest he almost wanted a baby.

“This is so fuck…this is so stupid. Clean up your mouth. She isn’t old enough to talk yet, but she will be,” Ari gets down to his knees, starting to remove the straps over her body. “She’s a pitiful little thing. Shh, girlie, you’re scaring your daddy before he’s properly got to look at you. There ya go,” he coos, holding the tiny girl up against his chest. Her cries soften a bit. He wonders when the last time she felt loved, because her body moves around feeling more of him.

“What’s wrong with her?” Both Ari and Lloyd’s noes turn up in disgust as they smell her. “She’s not been bathed?”

“That’s poop, Lloyd. We can’t have a baby here,” that is something Ari is certain of. Not only was this not a place for babies, he didn’t want to have to smell the baby smells.

“I didn’t ask for the baby. She was dropped on the mother fucking steps. Clara. I’ll kill that dumb trollop. Never trust desperate women. She doesn’t want money. She just didn’t want the baby. And I need her to have a name, so I’m not just calling her the baby. Ari, name her.”

“I’m not naming your spawn. She’s born of you, you name her. And my god, you gotta change this diaper, and figure out what you’re going to do in order for us to not have to deal with a baby like this. What the hell do you want?”

Lloyd turns to look at one of the analysts standing in the doorway. His thick rimmed glasses, and quiet demeanor made him one of Lloyd’s favorites. He was trustworthy, and smart. Quick. One of the few people Lloyd didn’t want to strangle. “Roman, what do you need? We’re dealing with someone.”

“You need an au pair.”

“What the hell is that?”

“It…it’s someone that will live in your home, and care for the child. They could teach them another language, and…”

“Sounds like a wife. Do I get to fuck them? Does she talk back to me?” Roman shakes his head no, wanting to say more, but doesn’t want to risk his job. He had the perfect person to help Lloyd with his little problem. “Where does one find an au pair?”

“I know someone that just recently graduated, and she speaks French. She has a degree in art history, and…”

“I need her at my house immediately,” Roman acts as if he’s about to say something until Lloyd cocks up a brow, “I will pay her handsomely.”

“You’re keeping the baby?” Ari’s answer comes in the form of Lloyd reaching towards the baby. Turning up his nose at the stench, but he holds her gently. Tenderly. He gives her a quick peck on her head. “He’s keeping the baby. Roman, call whoever. Sounds like the amount of money is not an issue.”

Staring up at the posh apartment buildings, and squeezing Chase’s hand, you wonder how you even got here. Your father didn’t do anything but give you money. You didn’t even know him. Didn’t know what he even did to make the money. And now you are taking orders from him. Allowed him to make you feel like shit for your education.

“You don’t have to listen to him,” Chase says calmly. Slipping his hand out of yours, he turns to look directly at you. “You’re a grown woman, you don’t have to listen to what daddy says.”

“Don’t call him that,” your father didn’t earn that name. That’s exactly what you called him, father. “I mean look at it, there could be worse places to live.”

“Yeah, and you’re caring for a child that isn’t yours. And where’s her parents? How often will you have this child?”

“I’m going to live with them.”

“That’s another thing, I don’t exactly like the idea that you live with them. Who are them?”

“It’s a need to know basis,” you mumble. Finally finding your footing you take a step forward. It was now or never and it seemed like it was going to be now. What did you actually have to lose? This was a guaranteed job. It’s not like you had to stay. The pay was great. And how hard could one baby be?

You were going into this job with a house, great pay, and it seemed somewhat cushy. “You’re just going to be giving another child a life without their parents.”

“And just think where I would have been without my nanny,” you spit out, feeling a bit more protective of a child that you haven't met. It wasn’t her fault anymore than it was yours. Children should be loved and taken care of, and that’s what you are going to do.

“I didn’t mean it like that.”

“I know you didn’t. You don’t have to go with me if you don’t approve,” sighing, Chase follows you as you walk into the building. Following the exact instructions you were given from your father. You didn’t know what you were walking into. It was just a job after all.

Neither you or Chase say another thing. He definitely could feel your irritation at the need to insert what he thought he knew about your life. Your life wasn’t horrible. You just didn’t have your parents. Especially not your father. He had a business. And whatever he did afforded you a charmed life.

Seems like this child was getting the same treatment. And if you could give her the life that your amazing nanny gave you, then you feel like you’re giving it back. You didn’t see yourself as a teacher, but maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. And it was just one small baby. Eventually she would be going to school, and that’s if you even stayed that long.

Attention was everything when it came to children. If you said no, and this was apparently an emergency, what would happen to this child? Every child deserves a good life.

You don’t fully bother knocking on the door. Just punch in the code to the apartment, and Chase tugs at your arm. He isn’t as comfortable with this as you are. Your father gave you the code, Lloyd didn’t want you to knock, he wants you to make yourself comfortable. Your eyes go wide as you look around.

You could see the house at one point was pristine, but now it’s chaotic. Empty boxes are everywhere, but all of them seem to be items for the child. Your father told you she was a baby, but not how new she was. Tiptoeing deeper into the apartment, Chase pulls you back into him.

“Announce yourself. This is weird.”

“Mr. Hansen?” The sweetest little baby gurgle comes from the next room, and you look up at Chase. “That’s a real baby, handsome. Can I go meet my employer now?”

“I’m right here. Scream if you need me.”

“Mr. Hansen?” You ask again, looking into the first room. It is an even bigger disaster. Stuff was everywhere. The room has so much potential, but why does everything seem new? “Mr. Hansen, do you need help?”

He needs a lot of help. Could barely tend to his own child. His movements seem very rigid and unsure of himself. “Yeah, I think she peed. She has on the diapers that change color when wet, but…I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“I babysat a few times,” it’s a bit of a stretch. They weren’t babies. But you’ve seen some movies. Read some things, “Let me see. Hey there, cutie,” she looks like she could break hearts. She is angelic. Chubby little legs, and the biggest dimples in her cheeks. Completely toothless with the prettiest bright green eyes and long lashes. “I think you’ve overwhelmed your daddy. Did you recently just get custody?”

There had to be a reason for this mess. But he went and spent a ton of money trying to give his daughter everything she needed and could ever want. “I just recently found out about her,” that took an unexpected turn. “I don’t know what I’m doing. I don’t have the time to really devote to her, but I don’t want her to do without, and…I’m in over my head.”

So he was a bit like your father. But he seems to currently be more hands on than your father was. It was cute, in a completely not weird way at all. Lloyd was older than you. A full grown man while you had only just graduated college. “I’m not an interior designer, but I know some. The apartment is a mess, I’m aware. Lyla needs so much, and this place was just here. I never took the time to do anything. So me and my partner ordered everything we could think of. I don’t think she needs everything we got, but she could. She has her bed, and her diapers, and there’s a box of formula and food in the kitchen. Her food should be there, right? I don’t think she plays with toys yet, but there’s some somewhere.”

“Is this a Dior stroller?”

“I was told it was a pram,” you stare at him, trying not to giggle. The fact that it was Dior was the more silly part. “I can’t do what I do and have her there it’s dangerous.”

“What do you do?”

“Don’t ask,” the look he gives you makes you take a step back, gawking up at him when you realize his size. He is tall. Arms that are thick and hard as steel. His shoulders are wider than your entire body, “Lyla will be provided for, and because of that so will you. Whatever you need. I’ll leave a card for you. I won’t be able to personally get all your…well, all your needs. So this seems like the best option.”

“My needs? Like food?”

“Uh, I know that you women have things you need,” he’s an idiot. “I’ll give you a check, so this looks legit, but I can provide all your special woman needs,” huge idiot.

“Yeah, I can get my ‘womanly needs’ with my paycheck. Do…how often are you going to be here if I’m living here?”

He puffs out a bit of air, and he fully gives you attention. His daughter now has a changed diaper, and he cradles her sweetly. Some stupid expensive silver teething toy in her mouth, and his eyes roam over your entire body. He’s a bit too handsome to be a father, and one that just so happened to be your employer. His eyes are too blue, and his arms look too thick, and you gulp, clenching your thighs together. What the fuck was this witchcraft?

“Every night if possible. I typically work remotely, but sometimes I do have to go out of the country, and that leads to a few days to a week without me coming home to you and Lyla,” is he smirking? You shouldn’t feel so small and taken aback, but your stomach erupts with annoying butterflies with how hard he’s staring at you.

“Would you like to see your room? It’s next to the baby’s. My bedroom is in the front of the apartment, just off the living room. So I’ll be the first to the door. Absolutely no one in this apartment. I don’t trust people. Especially not around my child, and I guess now you come into my protection. If you need to know the apartment is in another name. I have a tendency to create a lot of enemies, and I try to keep things here as safe as possible.”

Lloyd freezes when he hears Chase sneeze. Handing you the baby, he covers you and her with his body in such a quick motion it takes your breath away. Your loss of breathing had nothing to do with his weight digging into your skin, and you surely don’t let out an odd sound that has him giving you a quick wink.

“That would be my boyfriend.”

“Boyfriend? Roman didn’t say anything about a boyfriend.”

“Roman doesn’t even know when my birthday is. Do you have a problem with Chase being here?”

“What kind of name is Chase?” With your free hand, you shove him off you. You didn’t need him that close to you. “Honestly, what kind of name is that? And I said nobody visits.”

“You just told me that. He traveled here with me because he didn’t trust that I was coming to some apartment with some weird man that lured me here under false pretense just so he could murder me.”

“I don’t lure women here. This is a safe space for my daughter. I need you to make him leave,” Lloyd didn’t need to lure women. When he wanted a woman he could have one. And wanting a woman led to him becoming a father.

“But I don’t want to be here alone with a baby that can’t talk,” his eyes narrow at you. It is like you and Lloyd are playing a tit for tat game. Going back and forth of why Chase shouldn’t be here, and why you need him here. “He has a job. He works at an IT firm. Would you really want me here alone and by myself? What if someone comes here to attack me? Then Lyla is left all alone.”

“I’ve taken precautions that this would never happen. When you’re on the clock, Lyla is your only priority,” that made you feel slightly uneasy. You had to make a note to check the neighbors. Getting a feeling that someone was tasked with watching and listening to you and Lyla.

“When am I off the clock?”

“When I am here. Unless,” he gives you that eat shit grin again, shaking his head. Is he actually flirting with you, “I shouldn’t say that, sunshine. So what should Lyla call you? Nanny seems a bit too old and mature for someone sweet like you.”

“Why not my name?” He contemplates that for a moment, looking down at his little baby who stares up at you. If babies could talk, you wonder what she is thinking of.

“Dolly.”

“What?”

“I want her to call you, Dolly. Her Dolly. Ooh, yes, I like that. Let’s see what I should do about this boyfriend,” spinning on his heels Lloyd walks down the hallway, stopping the moment he sees Chase. Your boyfriend stands up immediately, holding out his hand for Lloyd to shake.

“I don’t like you.”

“I’m sorry?” Chase looks towards you holding the baby, and takes a quick gulp. Lloyd’s eyes go between the two of you before sidestepping in front of you. His wide body blocking Chase from looking in your direction. “What is this?”

“Chase, let's get something straight, when I’m not here, Dolly is on the clock.”

“Her name isn’t Dolly.”

“When I’m here, I’ll allow her to come and go as she pleases, but just like Miss Dolly, I need to get a background check on you. I don’t want just anybody to have access to my daughter, and her au pair. And absolutely under no circumstance will you be sleeping under my roof. This is my home, and my daughter’s, and I don’t need stupid boys coming in here and tainting that,” he turns to look at you. Giving you no time at all to process exactly what he is saying. He couldn’t be serious.

“Remember, I own your father. I also own you. I’m offering you money that you can’t refuse because he just cut you off, and you’re used to a certain lifestyle. I’m providing that for you. And I don’t want limp dicks in my home. Have I made myself clear?”

“You can’t do that.”

“I can do whatever I want, Dolly. I’m Lloyd fucking Hansen. If I want to cut every single finger off your father’s hands, I will. You can either have me as your employer or your enemy. And if you walk out that door with that boy, you will be my enemy. I’m not saying you can’t date him, I’m saying I don’t want him in my house or around my daughter. Have I made myself clear?”

“Yes,” his head tilts forward, and his piercing blue eyes give you a look. A look you can’t exactly explain, but it makes you feel things. Makes you ready to do whatever it is he told you to do. “Yes, sir.”

“Good girl. Get rid of the boyfriend.”

“But you’re here.”

“And so are you. There’s no need for him to linger around, while you move in. This is just an introduction, sweetheart. I need to walk you through all the boring stuff about your job. I’ll pay you extra if you get Lyla’s bedroom situated. This place is a complete disaster, and I can’t stand it. Get rid of him,” reaching towards Lyla, he walks back down the hallway to her room, and you give Chase an awkward smile.

“Come on, he can find someone else to be the au pair.”

“I need to see this through, Chase,” he tries interrupting you. Like he usually does, but you shake your head. You did need this job. None of the other places you applied at have called you back. “I need this job. It won’t be forever. And once I get settled in, and have my first day off, I’ll spend it with you.”

“You’re really going to let him talk to you like you’re his property?”

“No, I’m not. But I see myself in that little baby, and she needs me. He doesn’t know what to do.”

“Do you?” Nope. You had no idea about babies. You didn’t even have siblings. But your bags that were in Chase’s cars had a few books with some ideas on what to do. You’d figure it out along the way. Plus, you had this odd desire to understand your dad’s job, and also what exactly Lloyd did. How did a man that instilled so much fear in you also have a soft spot for his daughter?

“You’ll call if you want to leave? No questions asked, I’ll come and get you?”

“No questions asked,” you promise, kissing his lips softly. His hands cup your ass, and Lloyd glares at him down the hallway. How did Roman allow you to grow up and be disrespected in a stranger’s home? You allowed him to kiss down your neck, and neither of you even knew he was watching.

Lloyd would never let Lyla be treated like that. He wished he could make her not get any bigger. He liked the idea of having a woman in his home. Even if it wasn’t the way that a traditional family had it, who knew what the future held. You wanted to please him. Even told Chase it was time for him to leave. He still had it.

Chase pulls off your neck, and notices Lloyd watching you. His hands slip into your back pockets, and he gives your ass a bit of a squeeze, “Who’s girl are you?”

“I’m yours, Chase. Now go on, I’ll call you later,” his eyes flick over to Lloyd, who ventures into Lyla’s room. Going to lay her down for her nap as he tries to think of ways to get rid of Chase. He is an asshole. A cocky one at that. Unfortunately he reminded Lloyd of himself. And there is only enough room in your life for one asshole.

Next

Masterlist

Taglist: @tis-thedamn-season @marveloustaylortot @pono-pura-vida @peaches1958 @seitmai @smile1318 @andydrysdalerogers @cjand10 @midnightramyeoncravings @kmc1989 @floral-recs @pandaxnienke @theinheriteddutchess @rainydayandmondays @buckybarnesisdaddy @patzammit @xoxo-ls @rebeccapineapple @slutforchrisjamalevans @marvel-wifey-86 @jesevans @ughdontbeboring @infantasywonderland @vampy-doll @i-like-to-read-13 @missacidburn928 @charmed-asylum @honeyhoneylovelylove

[sheffran]

Eve Sheffield

Actress: N/A (S6)

AU: Maggie Wheeler (Janice from F.R.I.E.N.D.S — this actress is perfect for Eve 😘👌🏻)

Natural:

Imagine this with the same hairstyle but black with grey streaks through it 😂

Not only does Janice have the same hair length as Fran, not to mention the same brunette colour (for canon wise) but she also has the same high voice frequency and the same laugh too 😱

She also has a New Yorker accent like Fran

Motto: 🎵 I’ve got style I’ve got Claire I’m the daughter of a millionaire 🎵

Basics:

Birthday: May 1999 (same day as

the twins parents wedding anniversary)

Age: Newborn (S6)

AU:

5 years old in “The Sheffield Twins”

14 years old in “Twisted Times”

Adult in “Next Generations”

Sexuality: Heterosexual

Sex: Female

Nationality:

English-American

Religion: Jewish-Catholic

(Although wants to drop Catholicism and wants to focus more on Judaism but will always be a Catholic at heart)

Hobby: Violin (and unlike her sister Grace she actually is successful with it 😂)

Home:

Manhattan, NY (formerly; for about a week 😂)

Beverly Hills, California (currently)

Occupation (AU):

Doctor (to Fran’s delight 😂)

Theatre actress (temporarily)

Singer entertainer (fired)

_________________________________

Nicknames (AU):

Evie (by both her parents)

Frizzo ( by friends)

E

Cat

Honey, angel, sweetie etc (by her mother)

Sweetheart | darling (by her father)

Miss Sheffield (by Niles)

Bellatrix La Strange (by bullies; because of the colour of Eve’s hair and, somewhat, her voice 🥺)

Mrs Frankeinstein’s Daughter

Troublemaker (by C.C.)

Ev….. ia

Rugrat

The-One-That-Looks-Like-Maxwell

The Wonder Twins

Thing One and Thing Two

Evangeline

Eva

Fran & Maxwell’s Offspring N0. 1

Twiddle Dee & Twiddle Dum (in reference to both twins)

The Sheffield Twins

Dr. Sheffield (by Eve’s coworkers)

_________________________________

Family:

Mother: Fran Sheffield

Father: Maxwell Sheffield

(twin) Brother: Jonah Sheffield

Teenager:

Adult: (which is perfect because Patrick Dempsey actually does look like Maxwel, Charles Shaughnessy, a little bit 😂)

(half) Sister: Grace Sheffield

(half) Sister: Maggie Sheffield

(half) Brother: Brighton Sheffield

Extended:

Mom’s side:

Great great zayde: Jonah Samuel

Great great bubbe: Yetta Rosenberg

Bubbe: Sylvia Fine

Grandfather: Morty Fine

Great aunt: Freida Fine

Aunt: Nadine Cooperman

Uncle: Barry Cooperman

Cousin(s): ???

Dad’s side:

Great grandmother: Eve Catherine

Grand: James Sheffield (✝️)

Gran: Elizabeth Sheffield

Aunt: Jocelyn Sheffield

Uncle: Nigel Sheffield

Aunt: Conception (illegitimate)

Other:

“Aunt”: C.C Babcock

“Uncle”: Niles

“Cousin”: Sid/Syd (AU)

(foster) Sister: Mai-Ling

“Aunt”: Val Toriello

_________________________________

Appearance / personality: (AU)

Eve would have had big black, curly, hair with grey highlights and dark soulful (hazel) eyes. She also has inherited her grandmother’s (Sylvia) hips

She would tend to use different hairstyles for different outfits for different occasions of the week (but most of the time has her tendrils hanging out, sprayed, and curled)

Accessories:

Wears headbands to keep her hair back (sometimes; depending what went with her outfits)

How would you describe Eve’s personality?

* Expressive facial expressions

* Boisterous (Canon)

* Knowledgeable

* Uses her hands with gesticulation when talking

AU:

* Reserved

* Smart

Other: (Much more like her mother 😂)

Uses incessant endearments ie “honey”, “sweetie”, “angel” etc when speaking to someone regardless of the situation and who it is

She is a sleepyhead

She rubs her forehead out of stress, concentration, or annoyance (depending on the situation and mood)

She has her parents irritability

She has a huge appetite (like her mother and grandma Sylvia 😂)

She hates being called the “s” word: stupid

She does tend to do her hair when in a stressful situation

She’s overemotional

She hates conflict and will step, timidly, away from the person who is angry with her

She’s allergic to crustaceans; anaphylactic only (oy, her poor mother 😂)

She possibly has ADHD and a mild depression (situational)

She does pamper herself couple times a day and shuts her compact mirror in similar fashion that her mother does

She hates being referred as the half sibling (again this would be under influence and being taught by her parents. The only time she would accept it is if it’s about legalisation and medical)

She can be a shopaholic (particularly when emotional)

She walks, without hesitation, into her father’s office without knocking on the door (unlike her twin brother 😂)

She definitely doesn’t like to study or do as she’s told and has poor grades

Note: BUT is clever enough to hide her grade from her parents and turn into an A+ to avoid any sort of disappointment from them particularly her father (😈)

Likes to prank on friends and family much to her twin’s chagrin (Jonah had, oftentimes, told her off for neglecting her schoolwork and the consequences of what would happen if she continued)

She dislikes her twin’s passion for bantering (because she thinks it’s bad enough their “cousin” does it to them 😂)

She isn’t good at singing

She has low blood pressure (but usually the smell of food wakes her up 😂)

[txemrn]

Hi! I'm here to rant about the new chapter of TNA, hope you don't mind 😭

Every time I get more confused about the whole situation with Addison, regarding the twins.

One would assumed that even if she died when they were really little, they at least have photos of her, know she loved them so much and hear stories about her (and I blame dirty Dalton if they don't) idk have some sense of "yes this is my mother, she's gone, I'm sad, dad's always working and all the nannies quit, I miss my mom" but no, the poor children are having nightmares and act like they're scared of her, why PB? 😭 I mean yeah I guess I know why? Cause SHE'S A VILLAIN, NOT EVEN HER OWN CHILDREN LOVE 🙄

And also... I know MC has no moral right to complain about Jenny having sex with a married man in an office but... WHY!? Why in here guys!? 😂

Hey, Anon!

Yes! Come here; have a seat. Let me make some tea, and you just vent your little heart out. This is a safe space. lol *hugs*

I agree with you. We've had quite the shift of feelings from Books 1 & 2. In Book 1 & 2, it was understood, "Oh, Sam's late wife... love of his life..." "Oh, the kid's mother... they're still feeling the heartbreak of not having her around." Do you remember at the very beginning when you have the option to look at a picture of them skydiving? I'd imagine there were other photos...right?

This book, HOLY CRAP! Addison who? She comes with the most absurd, pitiful story (that could still be true--nothing has been verified. Again, where the FUCK is Sam's legal team? Medical records can be obtained, even subpoenaed), and suddenly Sam is like, "I don't love you!" and the kids are having subway nightmares. What?

OMG When they part happened, I LITERALLY gasped! I was like, "NOOOOOOOOO!" Because off, what a predicament, right? Her bestie, and her work hubby THAT SHE PUSHED TOGETHER IN THE FIRST PLACE boinking in her office, and who discovered them? OF ALL FRIGGIN PEOPLE, It had to be Evan. So you know he's going to hold MC accountable for disciplinary actions, but then Jenny is going to probably throw it back into MC's face... oi vey...

It's a mess. Such a mess. But, I don't know about you, but I love the mess. LOL

Thank you so, so much for sending me your thoughts! Seriously, I enjoying hearing everyone's opinions! 💜

On to the next chapter!

[hiraya-rawr]

If I see Diluc and his wife constantly dropping more babies I would just be blunt and offer them a pack of condoms for free since they probably don't have that in that era of Mondstadt 😂

or if I meet them the first time and hear eight kids I would just shout "EIGHT?! ARE YOU A SPIDER? DO YOU JUST SHOOT OUT BABIES LIKE PLOP PLOP PLOP" man I would be kicked out of Angel's Share so quick 😂

Seriously raising and keeping tabs on every kid properly is going to be hard even if you got that many nannies and maids you would still want your kids to turn out the best they can be in life. I would shit myself having that many kids tbh.

NAW 😭 DONT SHAME MC AND MY MAN FOR GROWING THEIR OWN VOLLEYBALL TEAM, BUT FR THO DO THEY HAVE BIRTH CONTROL IN MOND?? IDK

on a side note, I find this kinda funny as someone with 4 siblings and workaholic parents. each of us were raised by our own nanny! my parents loved us dearly but they were pretty busy :> idk how 8 kids would turn out tho 😭

[sheffran]

Annnnnnnnd future wife & mother to your twins 😈

She’s the lady in red when everybody else is wearing tan…

[thesevenwondersofawitch]

Watching Mr and Mrs Smith

Huh, they're being interviewed

I love her correcting him on how many years they've been together.😂

Uh-oh, if you're alone you're not safe.

Guess I'm dangerous *finger guns*

SHE HAS A WEAPON!

*explosions* "I'm Jane." "I'm John." 😂

FIREEEEE! Oh good, they're dancing. Annnnnnd They've had sex.

How did they get the sheet to start up like a dress? I could never do that.

Her missing on purpose with the gun game and then him getting them all, now her competitive side has come out

YEAH YOU SHOW HIM HOW IT'S DONE, JANE!

"Beginners luck." XD

I love her 😍

FIVE OR SIX YEARS LATER

THEY'RE GONNA CRASH! THE DRIVEWAY ISN'T WIDE ENOUGH!

They're fine.

*Watching them drive in separate directions* You can go your own wayyyyyyyyy! Go your own wayyyy

Oh, I low-key thought that black haired dude was gonna show up and Jane was gonna kil him, since they showed him in the office scene before.

John probably thinks she's the perfect housewife 🙄

She fought a dude for curtains? Oh I wish I were a fly on the wall at the store to see that.😂

"If you don't like them we can take em back." "Okay, I don't like them." "You'll get used to them." I'm with her dude.

HOW CAN SHE BALANCE LIKE THAT ON CHAIR WHILE IN HEELS?

Her not turning the light off and then saying 5 more minutes, brings back memories of being a little kid sharing a room with my sister who liked to read with the light on until late😂

That therapist is not helpful.

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, that's quite the ensemble to wear if she's dealing with someone who crashed a car. In a hotel room. And I suppose those handcuffs are because she's gonna arrest them?

John, I feel you lack subtlety.

Oh ok, not bad, but damn dude, those bros were just trying to play some games and you gotta be a party killer? Damn.

They really made her a dominatrix to kill her dude, but John got to play a game of poker to get his? Come on!

Oh my god, she's like an adult Nanny McPhee. I wanna purse like that.

Jane is me whenever I'm asked to hold a baby.

Damn, John really meant what he said about where he keeps his stuff.

I want that oven in my future kitchen. Fully equipped with those weapons.

Eddie listing the perks of living with his mom is so funny. 😂

FINALLY! We're getting to see some action of where they work!

JANE RUNS THE SHOW FOR WHERE SHE WORKS? YES!!

"Oh look, more desert." Mood.

Ok damn, she's really doing quite awesome with her stakeout point.😂

John is very much an idot.

OH SHIT SHE SHOT HIM

OH SHIT HE SHOT HER

You definitely should not be allowed to buy those things.

Jane is pissed.

Why did I think Father was actually her dad calling cause he was worried?😂

HE KNOWS!

SHE KNOWS!

He hid the knife only for her to come back with an even bigger one, he's panicking slightly.

She has another!

She is way better at being calmer than he is, he looks like a nervous mouse

She tried something new, I think he thinks she poisoned him XD

Oh no, the wine slipped!

Dude can't possibly catch up to her car

Hopefully he'll pay to have that fence fixed.

Annnnnnnnd he shot the windshield, that can not end well for him

Dude, do not run into the street to say it was an accident, thus putting yourself in the path of your angry wife.

Honestly? Can't even disagree with her decision to hit him with her car, dude has no self-preservation.

And he broke into the car, so she jumped out😂

Eddie, tho stupid, is hilarious.

Men are idiots.

Eddie has such a way of cheering a friend up.☺️

GIRL YOU LOVE HIM, OTHERWISE HE'D ALREADY BE DEAD

The garden party looks like fun

John really took a neighbor as a human shield

THEY TOOK HIS WEAPON STASH😂

He's in the vents!

I want that gun thing, it could be fun

Oooooooo they like each other!

Eddie really is funny

OH GOD THE ELEVATOR

IT BLEW UP

BUT SHE LOVED HIM

He's sulking 😂

I mean I guess I would be too if I was him

Aw, she's crying a single tear

and he's there

They're at the place he proposed 😍

They're disarming each other while they dance, I want that

He tried to blow her up?!

Oh it's ok, she tried the same.

I ship them so hard.

She hit his car so she could get into the drive first 😂 Whata mood

And Jane's taken the house as her base😂

That poor house

The music 😂

"Who's your daddy now?" 😂

I LOVE THAT SHE SLAPPED HIM AFTER THE SEX SCENE

The neighbors at the door 😂

Oh shit, people are after them now

That is not good

Yeah John, why does she get the girl gun?

Much better

Yeah, steal the car from the Colemans!

I would react the same way as Jane if I found out the person I was married to was married before and didn't tell me

"What's her name and social security number?" "No, you're not gonna kill her." 😂

She hired a dude to pretend to be her dad omg

Also it's so funny that she never cooked anything 😂

Eddie getting rude about Jane and then her popping up😂

They're matching outfits tho *chef's kiss*

Oh John is feeling funny cause his wife's body count is way higher than his!

"Who are you people?!" I love that they're bickering and Benjamin is in the background 😂

OH MY GOD IT WAS A TRAP AL ALONG?!

John: "This is a really good store."

Jane: *glares*

They're adorable

She threw a knife and it hit him in the thigh 😂

The elevator music is so cheerful 😂

Oh shit, Jane fell from the celling!

They've both been shot!

I swear if this movie ends with them both dying I'm gonna be pissed.

Oh thank goodness, they're wearing bulletproof vests

Me: *singing* "When I am with you there's no place I'd rather be no no no no!"

Oh my god, they're in therapy again 😂

They redid the house, the poor neighbors 😂 bet they left the Smiths alone tho!

What a fantastic movie, was pretty worried it would be meh, but it was good!

And in conclusion, if I wasn't already thirsting for Angelina Jolie, I am now.

[fakerbatch]

Someone on Twitter pointed out that Ben has more chemistry with kode than Sophie and a comment was- it's laughable when he tries so hard with women(something like that). Obviously nanny brigade came for attack- Ben isn't gay , because he said so😂

And the usual hatred for johnlockers. What is their mistake if he seriously has more chemistry with Martin, Hiddleston ,Holland and many many guys. And him being such a bad kisser on screen with women dosent help. He looks like he is repulsed by that action. It's such an eye sore, exactly how he is with his wife on red carpets. And anyone who has followed the promotions, interviews,set videos of Ben and Martin can see there was certainly some heat. Esp Ben couldn't hide it as well as he does now. That's why I want to see them together once now,after the show has ended, if they still so chummy together and whether Ben has developed a strong will to keep his straight face in front of him.

I do think there are two separate things going on here. He clearly can’t stand the wife, but it’s not just men he has more chemistry with—he is significantly more cuddly with lots of women. It just so happens I think those all give sister/friend/aunt/mother vibes (so I agree with you) but those who think he actually fancies women can not see it that way if they want. What I think everyone with a brain can agree on though is that he seems more human and happy with pretty much anyone else, male or female.

I don’t think Ben is ever very good at hiding his real feelings. So yeah it would be interesting to see him near Martin again. I doubt we will anytime soon.

[sheffran]

When the kids mainly Grace and Brighton start acting like Fran in S1-4

Whenever I watch The Nanny and Brighton calls Fran, “Mom” [season 6], I cry. Every time. It’s just so nice.

[sheffran]

Liar - Camila Cabello

Who: Maxwell Sheffield

Relationship: Common law

Season 1-4

[fakerbatch]

What statement did he make to deserve such eye rolls? I can only assume to what lengths this man is going to go this time. Will he top it up like his last year's campaign 😂?

It was in a NYT interview. Just a totally “look what a family man I am” story that he probably doesn’t even realize sounds super fake in the details (psst, dude, someone like you would have a nanny, not just because you’re rich but due to your filming schedules, if your wife is off doing more of her brilliant work we always see), and also weirdly like an attempt to copy Kirsten’s story. Worse I think was the “look how above it all I am” claim that he didn’t know it was happening that day. Which is absurd. Anyone up for such a big award would know that and that’s fine. For me the fact that he feels he needs to lie about that will just make it look to everyone like he’s even more thirsty for it. 🙄