#the man is obsessed with ornithology

[nobigneil]

Combat ostritch

[theboarsbride]

Also!

Which character has changed the most since your first draft of them, and how?

(God sorry for sending so many questions)

(OMG NO WORRIES I LOVE THESE KINDS OF QUESTIONS PLS KEEP SENDING THEM-)

But OH MY GOD!!!!! E D G A R. Edgar from The Monster and the Butterfly is the character that I feel has changed the most since the very VERY first draft of this story. Both in design and character! He and Sophie are some of my oldest OCs, with their story existing in some way shape or form for about 10 years when I first started writing in middle school!

Be prepared for a long post because omg I love rambling about the evolution of characters and stories, I hope you don't mind!!

Also I got excited about this ask so I included a rough visual of Edgar's previous designs:

Starting in 2014 he (or rather she) was Ophelia, a witch that cursed herself with a rogue spell, and her 'beauty' counterpart was a boy named Samael that was sacrificed to her by a witch cult lol. It was very cringe, very much 2010s Wattpad content (i mean...the story literally started with Samael waking up to his alarm and mom waking him up for school)... and I distinctly remember calling this story "Beautiful Beast" because I thought I was being very original with a female beast x male beauty story lmfao (i was not)

Then around that same time I discovered The Phantom of the Opera...meaning that Edgar was going to become a poorly done carbon copy of the Phantom lol. He was like this for about a year, and across the board he was a dragon shifter for some reason? I cannot remember why lol...and also I remember in these versions of the story he had a brother named Lazarus who's FC was Robby Benson, and his 'beauty' in this version was named Kristine and she had a son (???????). Again, very 2010s Wattpad cringe, very much plagiarized Phantom X Christine fanfic (i'm very sorry)

It was around 2016 when I discovered the movie Panna a Netvor/Beauty and the Beast (1979), a very gaudy, atmospheric Gothic horror retelling of the fairytale from then Czechoslovakia. I was OBSESSED With it (and still am!) so I wanted to create a bird-like beast like in the movie. At the same time I was also obsessed with stuff like Black Butler and Penny Dreadful so I was inspired to change this story set in Victorian Era London. But this version of Edgar was VERY horrible and very much made it a tragic horror story rather than Gothic romance. He was the one behind the Jack the Ripper murders, drinking the blood of woman to satiate himself, and had very poorly-written schizophrenia as he was 'haunted' by his dead mom. I did away with this idea around the time of the pandemic because I found the idea insensitive and overly-edgy. But nonetheless this was where TMATB as we know it came to be: Gothic romantic setting in late Victorian era London with a bird-themed beast and a main female character who was into gardening in some capacity.

Then story started becoming more romantic, Edgar went through another design change to now be a fleshy vulture-thing, and was now becoming a sympathetic, gentle beast who loved reading and ornithology. Still I wasn't satisfied in terms of his design tho.

So then around 2020, after wanting inspiration to create a more humanoid-looking beast (and getting such inspiration from Brad Dourif as Grima Wormtongue in the LOTR films and Danny DeVito as The Penguin in Tim Burton's Batman Returns), Edgar's design became this:

While remaining a romantic hero, his role has become the more feminine one in the romance: he is the one needing saving, he is the one often in distress, he reads romances often intended for women, he's a very passive romantic role, etc. Also, his character is now heavily inspired by historical figures like Joseph Merrick (a.k.a. The Elephant Man) and Quasimodo from Disney's Hunchback of Notre Dame, so now he's a gentle, well-read, kind-hearted, traumatized emotional basket case we all love today!

I hope this is a satisfactory answer omg so sorry for the long ramble of a post!!

[starryswirly]

Actually, fuck it. Sit down. I'm gonna tell you the story of Henry.

Fade in. It's a beautiful summer day in Arizona. My parents and siblings are out of the house. I am hanging out enjoying the fact that the house is empty save for my cats and sister.

The peace is suddenly broken by an exclamation from my sister, who had gone out to the yard to enjoy the sunshine. If you know someone long enough, you know what intonation requires your immediate response. This was one of those times.

I quickly get up, not knowing what to expect as I entered what I was soon to discover to be the boss fight of the week, nay, the summer.

This unidentified fucking THING is in our yard.

Now, one thing to know about us is that we are feral homeschoolers at heart. No amount of therapy can save us at this point. We grew up obsessively studying the wildlife of the area. We know immediately that this is NOT a local creature.

A look is exchanged, and we knew what had to be done.

The next twenty minutes were a mad action-packed chase with enough plot twists you'd think you were watching a Netflix film created to be put on in the background.

We took turns outsmarting one another, unclear who was one step ahead. Human vs bird. Teamwork and stamina versus sheer instinct. Both equally dedicated to the chase. Both equally set on the win.

Ladders were involved, nets were involved, trespassing was involved.

We chased him around our yard, the neighbors' yards, the brush, the bushes, the roof of my house. Nothing would stop us but utter defeat. Henry knew this and acted accordingly.

Finally, he was driven into our garage. His fate was sealed as he entered his concrete prison. It was there he was corralled into a rabbit cage, where he was finally captured for good. We had won.

Once the dust had settled, it was established that Henry was a Chukar Partridge, and belonged to our neighbor, whom he escaped from. He was returned and, sorry to say, was likely fed to his hunting dogs. Apologies for foiling your plans for a happy life, but you would've just been coyote bait in the end little man. No rest for the wicked.

Our neighbor was impressed we were able to capture him, as, upon further research, this is what scientists have to say about this particular bird:

It runs and scampers up steep terrain with the agility and speed of a mountain goat, prompting hunters to nickname it the "devil bird" for the brutal chase it gives. Via Cornell Lab of Ornithology

It was after all was said and done that I truly understood the appeal of sports. I knew what it was to be a persistence predator. I knew what humans had evolved for. I knew if I had the option, I would have not done a single thing differently.

I know the thrill of the chase.

And now I can only spend my days hoping for another chance to reach that high.

i CANNOT stop thinking about this job ad. i am absolutely losing it over the implication that someone is going to apply to this job who 1) loves chasing birds and 2) is disturbingly competetive about it

[ferrousoxyde]

pinned post

hi i will fix this soooooooon

this is TEMPORARY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111111

anyways my main is @ferroussulfayt this is just where i post about my stupid therian shit idk man

oh also i'm a minor don't be WEIRD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i have interests in ornithology, astronomy, genetics, evolutionary biology, chemistry, particle physics and uh uh idk

i hope to have a career in either astrophysics or biochemistry one day!

i'm obsessed with ducks and other anatids

my favorite duck species is cairina moschata :3

i use any pronouns and my main names are ferrous, nebula, ezra, cairina, and yeah idk (i will make an UPDATED thing later i am just laaazy)

my kin shit includes coyotes, cheetahs, bears, ducks, maybe a stingray or something idk man it's almsot midnight why am i still up

also CHEETAHS ARE NOT BIG CATS!!!! THEY ARE NOT GENUS PANTHERA!!!!!!!!

also i'm probably radioactive and you will get some form of genetic mutation talking to me i'm just that annoying

[bruhlsbees]

modern!flatmate!andrea marowski headcannons (sfw)

shout out to @rumblelibrary for the idea!!!! :)) i hope you enjoy our sweet boy (now man?) and his love for birds. if you'd like to see more of modern!flatmate!andrea please let me know! also here is the link for the nsfw headcannons! minors pls dni with that one!

andrea marowski was a transfer student from a school in poland, studying fine arts with a concentration in playing the violin

coming to america was a bit of a culture shock for him - at first he planned on living alone, but the transfer program suggested he live with a group of people, that way he would have a better time adjusting

and so he did - andrea moved into a flat with five other roommates and got to experience the full american college life

he was terrible at cooking when you first moved in - you'd find what he was cooking still on the stove with andrea nowhere to be found - prompting you to finish the cooking so the house didn't burn down

the man was so scatter brained that you felt like you were taking care of a toddler - he had a hard time remembering to eat, since he was always playing the violin or doing school work - that you would always make enough for both yourself and him

"you need to eat, you know, i think playing the violin could wait until after a meal"

he'd shake his head, brushing you off as he sat down at his desk to eat

"i'm not hungry"

you'd laugh at his comment, sitting on his bed as you ate your own plate

"you say that because you think you've eaten. you go to make something and when you walk away and forget your brain tells you that you ate it. when really you haven't and your body is starving"

he'd look at you, eyebrows furrowed into a glare, although he looked more adorable than frightening

"rude" he would say flatly

and you'd laugh again, shaking your head as you ate

"it's not being rude, andrea, it's telling the truth"

he lived next door to you - and since the walls were thin you could hear just about everything that went on in his room

you knew that andrea played the violin, and you always were pleased to listen - but he didn't understand that playing the violin wasn't something you do at 3 a.m. while everyone was sleeping

andrea also liked to knock on your wall. your desks were positioned at the same spot on either side of the wall, and with the walls being so thin you could hear him just fine

"y/n, i print paper?"

you were the one to have a printer in your flat. you knew that you should have just put it in the living room or something, but you used it the most so it stayed in your room

andrea was always polite, asking to use your things and doing it in your room so he wouldn't forget to give it back to you - but he had a terrible senes of personal space

when you laid in your bed, he would lay beside you, and since he was taller than you, he took up more room, but didn't see the issue

"andrea, could you please move your feet? they are in my face"

if you were sitting at the dining room table, he'd sit beside you, only he'd move the chair so you were shoulder to shoulder

at first you thought he was only doing it to be funny - to bother you like an annoying brother would - but then you caught him staring, smiling at you with his cheeks pink

he would whisper things in polish towards you during these moments, but you never knew what he was saying - and he never told you either

they were cute names though, nothing bad - beautiful was his most favorite that he called you

andrea did a lot of odd things - one of the things he especially liked to do was play dead in the pool your flat had out back

you were all dressed in your suit, ready to go swim, when you'd find him floating face down in the pool

of course you'd scream, you always did and you started to wonder if that's what kept him going

when you'd shake him, plead for him to be alive, he'd open his eyes and grin at you, letting out a laugh as you shoved him away, turning to go back inside and to your room

but he'd catch your wrist, giving you his best puppy dog expression, before mumbling an apology

and of course you accepted it, how could you not when he looked at you the way he did

you always liked to float on a raft in the pool, baking in the sun - when andrea arrived though, and after some time, he liked to hang off the raft, his head resting against your stomach

again, personal space was not something he seemed to understand

and then came the obsession with birds

one of your flatmates was a zoology student, concentrating in ornithology - the study of birds

he'd invite andrea out with him in the mornings to go bird watching and when andrea had come home, he'd be doing his best to mimic the bird calls

"y/n, listen!" he'd plead, coming into your room and nudging you back from your desk to turn your attention towards him

he'd smile proudly and close his eyes to concentrate before pursing his lips together to whistle out a tune of a bird he'd heard that day

it was adorable and even if it were bad - which sometimes they were pretty awful to listen to - you always clapped, grinning afterwards

"wow, andrea! that sounds so lovely. i'm happy to hear you are enjoying the bird watching"

he'd nod his head and smile, taking your hands in his before pulling you out of your room, still seated in your rolling chair, and into his room

"we go sometime?" he would ask as he pulled out his violin to play for you

you'd smile, nodding as you settled into your spot to listen to him perform

and when he finally began to play, he stared at you so intently that you couldn't help but blush, earning a smirk from andrea

it was one night, when he was laying in your bed beside your, flipping through one of the bird books your flatmate had given him, that you realized that maybe you liked andrea more than you realized

he was terrible with remembering to wear his glasses, but whenever he would read in your room you'd always make sure he had them on

you noticed him squinting, reading something on the page he was on, confused by the wording

"p-plumage"

you turned, looking at him, "what did you say?"

he pointed at the word, silently asking you to say it to him so he knew how to pronounce it

"oh, yeah, you were right. it's plumage"

he'd go back to reading, his nose stuffed in the pages as he continued to read

"y/n..." he'd begin, glancing at you, "do you think plumage attractive?"

it threw you off and you genuinely only asked what he said because you didn't catch him

but he didn't take it that way, he thought you were teasing him and he quickly turned back into his book, his face growing red

"andrea...what did you say?"

he was silent for a moment before glancing at you again

"i think my glasses broke" he said, trying to change the subject

you shifted to your side and took his face in your hand, turning for him to face you, looking over him and at his glasses, shaking your head

"i don't see anything, you just trying to get out of wearing them? you don't wear them and you won't be able to read your bird books or sheet music"

without thinking, you kissed his cheek, pulling back almost the same time as when you leaned in, before being the one to blush now

despite it being your room, you quickly climbed over him and excused yourself to the bathroom, leaving him to his book

he'd smile as you leave, looking down at his book once again

"you have nice plumage"

if you were they you'd probably ask what he meant by it, seeing as though you had no feathers, but he knew that and he would be too shy to tell you what he really meant, and would shrug it off like he did when you asked what he said to you in polish

but inside he knew what he meant: your plumage was the color of your eyes, how they twinkled when they caught the light - how your hair framed your face, bringing out all his favorite features

your plumage was everything about you, and to andrea you were his favorite song bird

[avoicebehindthestars]

My current faves (mind you, NOT my all-time faves, although some coincide - these are the ones I'm obsessing about atm) are:

Complete

Find the Light (rated E)

Human AU. Aziraphale is a school headmaster and Crowley is a rock star. They knew each other in their youth, but parted dramatically. It's quite easily one of the most comforting fics I've read, full of healing and reassurance. Demisexual Aziraphale stole my heart, as did the caring, protective Crowley. And despite being a human AU, the story provides a very hopeful rendering of the Final Fifteen and hypothetical s3 (you'll see what I mean when you reach that part ;)).

2. Starmaker and Starlight (rated G)

Canon-compliant pre-Beginning oneshot that gives insight into the relationship between Aziraphale and the Starmaker.

3. To reveal my heart in ink (rated E)

Post-s1, epistolary. Aziraphale misses the charm of old-fashioned correspondence and asks Crowley to humour him and exchange letters. Turns out, written words makes it easier to convey certain sentiments...

WIPs:

Sky Clear Blue (rated E)

Human AU featuring time-travel. In 2024 starmaker-coded autistic ace Crowley lives in a flat above a defunct bookshop that used to belong to an A.Z. Fell, and works on a bizzarre machine. In 1804 Azekiel Z. Fell, a closeted gay with period-typical internalised homophobia, is being forced by his father into arranged marriage. One night Crowley finds himself in his own flat, albeit 220 years earlier.

Plenty of fluff, comfort and tenderness combined with A LOT of angst later on!

2. There Is a Light & It Never Goes Out (rated E)

Human AU, currently on hiatus. Aziraphale is an ornithology professor who came on a remote island to study puffins and escape certain personal problems. Crowley is a recluse who mans the local lighthouse. There's A LOT of mutual healing and comfort and, despite some angst (mostly relating to their past trauma), most of the time it's like wrapping a fluffy marshmallow around your heart.

3. Purrchance To Dream (rated M)

Post-s2, comic with accompaning narrative. Crowley is still heartbroken when he begins to stumble upon a fluffy white blue-eyed cat time after time. Quite angsty and mysterious.

It's been a while since I put together Part 1 of my GO fanfic recs. Having read a ton more since then, I figured it was time for another list.

In no particular order:

1. 'On Espionage and Prophecy (or How to Accidentally, but Wholly, Fall in Love With a Soho Bookseller)' by RockSaltAndRoll (Explicit)

This fic takes place in 1941 with MI5Agent!Crowley and bookseller!Aziraphale. Aziraphale is first recruited by, who he thinks, is an MI5 but turns out not to be. Crowley, an actual MI5 Agent then recruits him to "double cross the double-crosser". Lots of pining and badassery (from both sides) ensue in this one!

2. 'Ricochet' by NaroMoreau (Explicit)

I'm a sucker for anything written by Naro but 'Ricochet' has become one of my favourite fics of theirs. Crowley is missing his angel after S2 and ends up summoning another version of Aziraphale. So, we get 1 Crowley, 2 Aziraphale's. The best mix. The writing in this is *chef kiss*. How Naro writes Crowley's pain and the characterizations of the 2 separate Aziraphale's -- just gorgeous.

3. ‘Terminus’ by BraveLight (Teen & Up Audiences)

I had no idea how much I needed an Astronaut!Aziraphale and MissionController!Crowley AU in my life until I read this fic. They have to team up to get Aziraphale home, but there’s way more to the mission than meets the eye. The twists and turns had me clicking 'next chapter' instantly. And the way Crowley and Aziraphale's relationship is written is so gentle and romantic—it’s perfect.

4. "Villainous" by IneffablePenguin (Explicit)

This is THE fairy tale AU you need to read! Crowley (Crow) is a sorcerer, and Aziraphale (Azra) is a prince—this fic honestly feels like it belongs on a best-seller list. IneffablePenguin has a real gift for painting vivid scenes that are so easy to picture. And those final chapters? They totally got me. I couldn't put this fic down.

5. "Cilice It To Say" by izzyspussy (Explicit)

Ho boy. This will be a fic I'll think about often. It's up there with the one I mention next. It's not as explicit as some of the other I've read but jesus christ. As it says on the tin: Crowley has a kink - The kink is Aziraphale. This is big on divinity kink, if that's not your jam, you may not like this one.

6. "Tether" by Ginger_Cat (Explicit)

It's coming up on a year of reading this fic and I think about Chapter 6 constantly. I don't want to spoil it but let me tell you, it's worth it. Aziraphale, now Supreme Archangel, keeps getting summoned back to Earth by Crowley but they don't know why.

7. "Intermezzo" by FeralTuxedo (Explicit)

Aziraphale is a music critic who, back in the day, tanked Crowley’s classical music career with a harsh review of his debut opera. If my fic recs haven’t given it away yet, I’m all about that bickerflirting, and this fic provides. It's also by FeralTuxedo. Anything written by them is 10/10.

WIP'S

8. “Reclaimed” by gallifreyshawkeye (Mature):

Are you in the mood for some Crowley Whump? If so, this fic DELIVERS. Gallifreyshawkeye knows how to paint a very vivid image of injury, so do mind the tags. This takes place 4 years after S2 and Crowley gets dragged down to hell by Satan in front of Aziraphale. It's honestly one of my favourite WIP's at the moment. I am on the edge of my seat whenever a new chapter comes out.

9. "Wavelengths & Frequencies" by imposterssyndrome, shades_of_eccles_cakes (Explicit)

Who doesn't love an enemies to friends to lovers story? While this fic only has 3 chapters so far, I am hooked. But hey, you give me a fic with Crowley and Aziraphale as radio hosts, I am there! I'm so excited to see how this develops and to see more of our 2 idiots going at each other.

10. "Stroke Play" by moonyinpisces (Explicit)

Moony knows how to write pining and I am here for it. In this AU, Crowley competes in beach volleyball, while Aziraphale takes on the golf course at the 2024 Olympics. They're both so down bad for each other but no one communicates. I love it!

Got any good fic recs? Send them my way :) Sharing is caring.

[xoteajays]

MAIN CHARACTERS

FIADHNAIT QUIRKE ‘FAWN • fc: nicola coughlan. a vet’s assistant turned ornithology student, fawn quirke has a habit of curiosity and stumbling her way through the wilds in search of birds. the only daughter of the long-divorced quirke parents, she split her childhood between her mother’s small home, tending to the house and her grandfather, and her father’s farm, tending to the animals. finding herself caught out in the middle of a storm while on a trip out looking for a bird, she comes across an old castle, lights shining through the old windows. better a strangely lived-in and tended-to castle then to wait out the night in a worsening storm, she decides, and thus she comes into the lives of teague and anne.

MONTAGUE ‘TEAGUE’ • fc: tom ellis. the more open of the vampire couple. an art fan with quite the collection of paintings and busts, many if which are made in his own visage. can’t quite remember his own age and has long since stopped counting. was sired by his newly-a-vampire friend, a situation in which nearly killed the both of them, neither fully knowing how to rightly sire someone. eventually split from his friend and his friend’s sire to travel alone, later meeting anne. she was the one to suggest a kind of ‘marriage’, a union that would benefit and protect them both. while neither were particularly the other’s type, they still care deeply for each other. the only things they really argue about: anne calling him ‘monte’, and the mixing and sometimes misplacing of their respective books and art.

OVSANNA ‘ANNE’ • fc: angela sarafyan. the older of the vampire couple and the slightly more closed off. she still struggles with her vampiric life and longingly remembers the human life that was stolen from her and all that she missed. as a human, she was poisoned and in her withering, isiah came to her. under the guise of saving her, he turned her. it was years later when she discovered he was the one to poison her in the first place and she’s had a distrust for most men ever since. she has wanted to kill isiah for years, but he frightened her with stories of anyone sired under a vampire dying if the original dies; she doesn’t know if this is the truth or another lie of his. a literary enthusiast, anne fills their home with all manner of books, burning those that she deems too bad to keep.

SIDE CHARACTERS

ISIAH • fc: alexander skarsgard. a bastard man. a vampire who has been alive for a long time and hasn’t told anyone his age, not even those he sires. he poisoned anne while she was human so he could ‘play the hero’ and sire her. he’s been obsessed with her since she left him and is determined to either make her ‘life’ miserable or bring her back to his side at whatever cost. like his age, how many vampires he has sired is unknown.

JEANNINE ‘JOAN’ FLAMEL • fc: rachel weisz. the granddaughter of the original immortal flamels. her grandparents have long since died after having raised her from a young child after the deaths of her parents; in their deaths, they left the philosopher’s stone to her. she’s since spent her life studying alchemy, medicine and poisons, as well as bringing people back to life à la victor frankenstein. she met teague and befriended him, eventually moving into his castle to her properly handle his money and make sure he doesn’t out himself as a vampire while continuing her studies. deals with the corpses of anne and teague.

AISHA VIPOND • fc: ashleigh murray. a witch and descendant of tituba. holds the spirit of a few past lives inside her, blessed and cursed with a kind of reincarnation. for her last few reincarnations has been friends with anne and promised a mutual protection between them, anne from witches and aisha from vampires. aisha, during her first interaction with anne, was to make her a necklace so she could walk in the sun without dying; she’s one of few witches who can. they became friends over time. anne has at times given her vampiric blood or human bones that aisha needs for spells or other witchcraft.

[thetypedwriter]

Black Wings Beating Book Review

Black Wings Beating Book Review by Alex London 

Do you ever have to go to a work/school/mandatory meeting and then think to yourself an hour later...wow, that could have been summed up in an email?

Black Wings Beating by Alex London kind of felt like that to me. 

Black Wings Beating is a series that surrounds twin siblings, Brysen and Kylee, and the ornithological world that they live in. Ornithology, in case you don’t know, is the zoological study of birds. 

This book has so many birds. 

My god. The birds. 

And bird references, allusions, metaphors, and expressions. I didn’t even know that many bird-like turn-of-phrases existed until this book and now I am painfully aware. 

But these siblings live in a world that is dominated by the presence of birds, the training of birds, the selling and buying of birds, and the companionship of birds. Even the legends, myths, culture, civilization, and religion surround freaking birds. 

It didn’t bother me too much at the beginning, and all the little facets you learn about falconry and bird species was intriguing at first, but it was something that very quickly outgrew its welcome for me. 

In this world, Brysen wants to be a great bird-handler hero by catching the legendary Ghost Eagle, a feat that many have attempted and all have failed.

His sister simply just wants to live her life in peace and harmony while ignoring the special language deep inside of her that allows her to command birds (a gift that is largely ignored and mistrusted by her, but revered by everyone else who knows about it). 

Neither of them get what they want, as Brysen idiotically offers to go on a hunt to fetch the Ghost Eagle himself (without help, foresight, or experience) all in the name of love for a guy who obviously doesn’t give a shit about him, and Kylee, being the kind, good-natured sister that she is, follows him into this idiotic quest despite her obvious misgivings about it. 

This is then followed by another character named Nyall who then follows after her as he loves her and bam, you’ve got three teenagers up in the mountains attempting to catch a mythological bird creature that no one has even been able to catch before. 

That’s pretty much the book. 

You’ve got some confusing miscellaneous stuff thrown in there as well, like the leader of the Kartami-a new group that despises birds and believes in slaughtering all of them and the people that have anything to do with birds-which is um, everyone? 

So basically, a terrorist group out there to kill the whole world. 

You’ve got the Council of Forty, which is some government that doesn’t really make sense in some far-off place, you’ve got some random Kyrgs that don’t seem to accomplish much, and then you’ve got the ghostly Owl Mothers and their coven boys who also are somehow entangled with the political nonsense of the Council of Forty wanting the Ghost Eagle and that’s really about it. 

So. Why did this book feel like a two-hour long meeting when it could have been a succinct email?

Because nothing really happens. It does, but not really when you get into the meat and potatoes of it. 

The whole book is the trio climbing the mountains, facing off against the Owl Mothers, getting the Ghost Eagle, miraculously getting back in like three pages compared to the three-hundred it took to get them there, and then a sporadic and puzzling fight at the end for who gets to control the Ghost Eagle and how its powers could be utilized the best. 

This book was just...odd in terms of how it decided its pacing and its logic. 

I��ll start by saying that this isn’t a bad book and I did enjoy portions and aspects of the world that London created. However, I also was heartily annoyed by several of the things that occurred. 

The highlights of this book are definitely it’s world building, entertainment value, and relatively mindless experience. This isn’t a hard book to read and it comes across as a juicy novel with action and adventure if that’s what you’re looking for, especially if you adore birds. 

Now onto the laundry list of items that aggravated me. 

The birds were too much. It’s like they asked London to come back with a sprout and he brought back a forest. I would have enjoyed the world of Uztar and all its intricacies if the bird analogies and references weren’t shoved down my throat every other sentence in the most ludicrous of ways, most non sensibly being the dialogue. Aka, referring to others as fledgelings and eyas’ made me want to hurl every time it was used. 

The POV of this book swapped back and forth between Kylee and Brysen, and originally, I thought I’d favor Brysen as he was the cool gray-haired eager eyed rascal that runs off to fight for what he believes in, but Brysen was easily the most irritating thing about this whole experience.

 He’s stupid, impulsive, selfish, naive, and just...kind of a jerk? Especially to his sister that literally does nothing else but try to protect him and love him. 

Now, for those of you who have read this book, you might be screaming at me. But his father beat him! He is the way he is because Kylee didn’t protect him as a child! His mother is useless! He’s had a horrible life. All of this is true. 

As London likes to remind you EVERY SINGLE PARAGRAPH, Brysen was abused heavily by his father and their father was a horrible, despicable man without a single redeeming bone in his body. 

Now, I obviously don’t condone abuse and the effects of child abuse are varied and complex, but in this case, I felt like London used it often and debilitatingly as a crux for Brysen just to be a bad character. Bysen does something you don’t like? It’s because of his abuse. Brysen is being dumb? Because of his abuse. Brysen not thinking things through again? Obviously because of the abuse. 

Now, I’m not trying to be callous here, but abuse, especially child abuse, has been done in YA literature before and done well. Meaning that the effects of the abuse are varied, nuanced, and not the whole sum of the character’s personality.

 A great example of this is basically any character from Nora Sakavic’s The Foxhole Court. All of the characters from that series are influenced by abuses they’ve suffered, but it isn’t the totality of who they are as human beings and it also isn’t brought up every goddamn second in order for it to be weighty and important. 

I understand that child abuse is a hugely sensitive and important factor. You don’t need to remind me every other sentence in order for it to be treated as such, which is unfortunately how it plays out in the novel. 

Kylee, on the other hand, I thought was the far superior twin. She also had a troubling childhood, but it didn’t define her and she also didn’t use it to justify her good or bad qualities. I would have preferred if the whole book had been from her POV with lovesick Nyall following after her in the mountains. 

Another important thing to mention is the anticlimactic sequence of them actually catching the Ghost Eagle. For a mythological bird that has killed hundreds and is supposedly impossible to catch and contain, Brysen, Kylee, Nyall and a coven boy are able to do it with literal ease. 

I think it was a five page fight before Brysen was strapping the humongous bird onto his back like a lumberjack and skipping on back to the village. It was disappointing to say the least. 

Lastly, there are just some things in this book that if you think too hard about, don’t make any sense. 

How can four teenagers catch the Ghost Eagle of legend with a few kicks and punches where hundreds of trained men have been unable to do it before? 

According to London, it’s because they have love and because they’re operating as a group. I’m sorry, you’re telling me that not a single group has attempted it before? Why not make a huge expedition party if that was the case? It makes no sense. 

Another example is the ending scene. Why can’t Brysen go with Kylee to the Sky Castle? Well, according to the Owl Mother it’s because Brysen is too important to Kylee and it affects her ability to use the Hollow Tongue too much. 

Translation: London doesn’t want them together in the sequel for a variety of reasons so he made up this bullshit excuse that doesn’t have any levity. 

Again, on the surface, it’s fine, but then if you think deeper about it, a lot of the book's choices and so-called logic collapse in on itself like a deck of cards which makes for a frustrating reading experience and personally unsure if I’ll pick up the sequel or not (probably not). 

Recommendation: If you are a bird-enthusiast, want to become a bird, or need something to alleviate your Angry Bird obsession that has still somehow not died down, this book will have you frothing at the mouth.

 For everyone else, this book is average at best. Not the worst story, but certainly not the best. If you want a quick adventure story, then go for it. If you want complexity, nuance, and not to hate birds whenever you see them, I’d fly clear (sorry couldn’t help it, I’m sure London would be proud even if I’m internally screaming). 

Score: 4.5/10

[coffeebased]

It’s been a whole year since I posted last. Part of me wants to apologise for being gone so long, but mostly I’m just glad that I’m here.

Instead of doing a GIANT 2018 READING POST, I’m going to chop it up into three posts:

Favourite Books Read in 2018

2018 Reading Data and Goal-setting for 2019

2013-2018 Reading Data Trends

I was going to do a bigass one like I usually do but it just felt so daunting. Probably because I read 256 books in 2018 and it was pretty tempting to just close that Excel sheet and move on to an empty one for 2019. But what is the point of an unexamined life, anyway?

So this post is basically a listicle with summaries grabbed from Goodreads, as well as the complete list of the books I read in 2018. I really enjoyed all these books immensely and they’re all in my personal canon now.

My Top 10 Reads for 2018:

The Odyssey by Homer, translated by Emily Wilson

The first great adventure story in the Western canon, The Odyssey is a poem about violence and the aftermath of war; about wealth, poverty, and power; about marriage and family; about travelers, hospitality, and the yearning for home.In this fresh, authoritative version—the first English translation of The Odyssey by a woman—this stirring tale of shipwrecks, monsters, and magic comes alive in an entirely new way. Written in iambic pentameter verse and a vivid, contemporary idiom, this engrossing translation matches the number of lines in the Greek original, thus striding at Homer’s sprightly pace and singing with a voice that echoes Homer’s music.

Circe by Madeline Miller

In the house of Helios, god of the sun and mightiest of the Titans, a daughter is born. But Circe is a strange child—not powerful, like her father, nor viciously alluring like her mother. Turning to the world of mortals for companionship, she discovers that she does possess power—the power of witchcraft, which can transform rivals into monsters and menace the gods themselves.Threatened, Zeus banishes her to a deserted island, where she hones her occult craft, tames wild beasts and crosses paths with many of the most famous figures in all of mythology, including the Minotaur, Daedalus and his doomed son Icarus, the murderous Medea, and, of course, wily Odysseus.But there is danger, too, for a woman who stands alone, and Circe unwittingly draws the wrath of both men and gods, ultimately finding herself pitted against one of the most terrifying and vengeful of the Olympians. To protect what she loves most, Circe must summon all her strength and choose, once and for all, whether she belongs with the gods she is born from, or the mortals she has come to love.

3. The World of the Five Gods by Lois McMaster Bujold

A man broken in body and spirit, Cazaril, has returned to the noble household he once served as page, and is named, to his great surprise, as the secretary-tutor to the beautiful, strong-willed sister of the impetuous boy who is next in line to rule.

It is an assignment Cazaril dreads, for it will ultimately lead him to the place he fears most, the royal court of Cardegoss, where the powerful enemies, who once placed him in chains, now occupy lofty positions. In addition to the traitorous intrigues of villains, Cazaril and the Royesse Iselle, are faced with a sinister curse that hangs like a sword over the entire blighted House of Chalion and all who stand in their circle. Only by employing the darkest, most forbidden of magics, can Cazaril hope to protect his royal charge—an act that will mark the loyal, damaged servant as a tool of the miraculous, and trap him, flesh and soul, in a maze of demonic paradox, damnation, and death

4. Noli Me Tangere by Jose Rizal, Translated by Harold Augenbraum

In more than a century since its appearance, José Rizal’s Noli Me Tangere has become widely known as the great novel of the Philippines. A passionate love story set against the ugly political backdrop of repression, torture, and murder, “The Noli,” as it is called in the Philippines, was the first major artistic manifestation of Asian resistance to European colonialism, and Rizal became a guiding conscience—and martyr—for the revolution that would subsequently rise up in the Spanish province.

5. America is Not The Heart by Elaine Castillo

Three generations of women from one immigrant family trying to reconcile the home they left behind with the life they’re building in America.

How many lives can one person lead in a single lifetime? When Hero de Vera arrives in America, disowned by her parents in the Philippines, she’s already on her third. Her uncle, Pol, who has offered her a fresh start and a place to stay in the Bay Area, knows not to ask about her past. And his younger wife, Paz, has learned enough about the might and secrecy of the De Vera family to keep her head down. Only their daughter Roni asks Hero why her hands seem to constantly ache.

Illuminating the violent political history of the Philippines in the 1980s and 1990s and the insular immigrant communities that spring up in the suburban United States with an uncanny ear for the unspoken intimacies and pain that get buried by the duties of everyday life and family ritual, Castillo delivers a powerful, increasingly relevant novel about the promise of the American dream and the unshakable power of the past. In a voice as immediate and startling as those of Junot Diaz and NoViolet Bulawayo, America Is Not the Heart is a sprawling, soulful telenovela of a debut novel. With exuberance, muscularity, and tenderness, here is a family saga; an origin story; a romance; a narrative of two nations and the people who leave home to grasp at another, sometimes turning back.

6. The Feather Thief: Beauty, Obsession, and the Natural History Heist of the Century by Kirk W. Johnson

A rollicking true-crime adventure and a thought-provoking exploration of the human drive to possess natural beauty for readers of The Stranger in the Woods, The Lost City of Z, and The Orchid Thief.

On a cool June evening in 2009, after performing a concert at London’s Royal Academy of Music, twenty-year-old American flautist Edwin Rist boarded a train for a suburban outpost of the British Museum of Natural History. Home to one of the largest ornithological collections in the world, the Tring museum was full of rare bird specimens whose gorgeous feathers were worth staggering amounts of money to the men who shared Edwin’s obsession: the Victorian art of salmon fly-tying. Once inside the museum, the champion fly-tier grabbed hundreds of bird skins–some collected 150 years earlier by a contemporary of Darwin’s, Alfred Russel Wallace, who’d risked everything to gather them–and escaped into the darkness.

Two years later, Kirk Wallace Johnson was waist high in a river in northern New Mexico when his fly-fishing guide told him about the heist. He was soon consumed by the strange case of the feather thief. What would possess a person to steal dead birds? Had Edwin paid the price for his crime? What became of the missing skins? In his search for answers, Johnson was catapulted into a years-long, worldwide investigation. The gripping story of a bizarre and shocking crime, and one man’s relentless pursuit of justice, The Feather Thief is also a fascinating exploration of obsession, and man’s destructive instinct to harvest the beauty of nature.

7. Educated: A Memoir by Tara Westover

An unforgettable memoir in the tradition of The Glass Castle about a young girl who, kept out of school, leaves her survivalist family and goes on to earn a PhD from Cambridge University

Tara Westover was 17 the first time she set foot in a classroom. Born to survivalists in the mountains of Idaho, she prepared for the end of the world by stockpiling home-canned peaches and sleeping with her “head-for-the-hills bag”. In the summer she stewed herbs for her mother, a midwife and healer, and in the winter she salvaged in her father’s junkyard.

Her father forbade hospitals, so Tara never saw a doctor or nurse. Gashes and concussions, even burns from explosions, were all treated at home with herbalism. The family was so isolated from mainstream society that there was no one to ensure the children received an education and no one to intervene when one of Tara’s older brothers became violent.

Then, lacking any formal education, Tara began to educate herself. She taught herself enough mathematics and grammar to be admitted to Brigham Young University, where she studied history, learning for the first time about important world events like the Holocaust and the civil rights movement. Her quest for knowledge transformed her, taking her over oceans and across continents, to Harvard and to Cambridge. Only then would she wonder if she’d traveled too far, if there was still a way home.

Educated is an account of the struggle for self-invention. It is a tale of fierce family loyalty and of the grief that comes with severing the closest of ties. With the acute insight that distinguishes all great writers, Westover has crafted a universal coming-of-age story that gets to the heart of what an education is and what it offers: the perspective to see one’s life through new eyes and the will to change it.

8. The Wicked + The Divine, Vol. 7 and 8 by Kieron Gillen, Stephanie Hans, André Lima Araújo, Matt Wilson, Kris Anka, Jen Bartel

In the past: awful stuff. In the present: awful stuff. But, increasingly, answers.

Modernist poets trapped in an Agatha Christie Murder Mystery. The Romantics gathering in Lake Geneva to resurrect the dead. What really happened during the fall of Rome. The Lucifer who was a nun, hearing Ananke’s Black Death confession. As we approach the end, we start to see the full picture. Also includes the delights of the WicDiv Christmas Annual and the Comedy special.

9. Mister Miracle by Tom King and Mitch Gerads

Mister Miracle is magical, dark, intimate and unlike anything you’ve read before.

Scott Free is the greatest escape artist who ever lived. So great, he escaped Granny Goodness’ gruesome orphanage and the dangers of Apokolips to travel across galaxies and set up a new life on Earth with his wife, Big Barda. Using the stage alter ego of Mister Miracle, he has made quite a career for himself showing off his acrobatic escape techniques. He even caught the attention of the Justice League, who has counted him among its ranks.

You might say Scott Free has everything–so why isn’t it enough? Mister Miracle has mastered every illusion, achieved every stunt, pulled off every trick–except one. He has never escaped death. Is it even possible? Our hero is going to have to kill himself if he wants to find out.

10. The Band, #1–2

Clay Cooper and his band were once the best of the best — the meanest, dirtiest, most feared crew of mercenaries this side of the Heartwyld.

Their glory days long past, the mercs have grown apart and grown old, fat, drunk – or a combination of the three. Then an ex-bandmate turns up at Clay’s door with a plea for help. His daughter Rose is trapped in a city besieged by an enemy one hundred thousand strong and hungry for blood. Rescuing Rose is the kind of mission that only the very brave or the very stupid would sign up for.

It’s time to get the band back together for one last tour across the Wyld.

PHEW. Did you guys read any of those books? Did you like them? Hit me up!

The books I read in 2018:

Okay, thank you for reading. Keep a weather eye out for the next post, hopefully very soon.

My Ten Favourite Books from 2018 It's been a whole year since I posted last. Part of me wants to apologise for being gone so long, but mostly I'm just glad that I'm here.

[yasbxxgie]

Birding Is Booming. So Where Are the Black Birders? Raising the profile of Black birders could help foster a healthy connection between Black communities and the natural world.

Tiffany Adams grew up in the Chelsea-Elliott Houses, a sprawling, low-income housing project on the west side of Manhattan. There, cookie-cutter brick buildings are separated by modest courtyards with benches and tables. Trees and grassy yards enclosed by black, wrought-iron fences dot the fringes of the project. The scant open spaces could seem confining, except to young girls with dreams of growing up to become zoologists or to tired, hungry birds navigating the Atlantic Flyway.

During her youth, Adams escaped to the natural world by watching National Geographic and the Discovery Channel. Five years ago—on a lark, so to speak—she attended a bird walk in Central Park. Looking up in the sky, she saw a world that she could not unsee, even upon returning to her housing complex. There, right outside her door, she saw an unexpected number of avian species—northern parulas, black-throated blue warblers, black-throated green warblers. She hasn’t stopped looking.

“Not too many people saw the value of birding in the projects,” Adams says. “But when they’re migrating, birds don’t say, ‘Oh no, those are the projects, I’m going to go to Central Park. I got to eat, I got to rest, and I got to find a mate. So whatever habitat is suitable to doing those things, I got to find it.’ Ecosystems don’t stop according to neighborhoods.”

A lot of people don’t get Tiffany Adams mostly because she’s Black, and, well, everyone knows Black folks don’t watch birds. Though the outdoor activity is booming in this country, birding is as White—93 percent, according to the most recent U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service survey—as the feathers of a whooping crane. The field markings of the typical American birder would be: White, female, 53 years old.

African Americans make up 13.4 percent of the U.S. population, but according to Fish and Wildlife, only 8 percent of all African Americans admit to intentionally viewing feathered creatures, making the Black birder as rare a bird as exists.

One of the uncommon species, Adams now is a self-trained ornithologist who last year completed a master’s degree in urban environmental education at Antioch University in Seattle. She also has the special ability to create various species of birds out of pipe cleaners. Even so, many people refuse to take her ornithological pursuits seriously. Her bona fides still are questioned when she posts about birds on social media.

Or friends misunderstand her passion: One messaged her with a question about a sick cat.

“My friends think either I’m a veterinarian or I’m doing this as a hobby, or that I’m a hippie—and I’ve actually been told that,” Adams says. “For a while, I really felt insecure. Ultimately, I could not stop watching birds. I’ve learned to embrace my nerdiness.”

John Robinson, a Southern Californian who has birded and advocated for Black birding for decades, has a theory about that. He calls it the “Don’t Loop.” It’s simple: African Americans don’t bird because people don’t engage in activities in which they don’t see people like themselves. For Black people and bird-watching, it’s a self-perpetuating scarcity. Bird-watching is not ingrained in the culture the way it is for a lot of White families and doesn’t get a generational handoff.

Robinson surmises that he joined this rare flock because he was comfortable growing up as the only Black kid in a Jewish neighborhood. So it wasn’t a big leap for him when White friends took him out hiking and birding in college. Still, he hid his passion from Black friends who wouldn’t understand and White people who might be suspicious.

It was 1979 when Robinson, then in his 20s, picked up his first pair of binoculars. “I knew I was different,” says Robinson, whose book Birding for Everyone: Encouraging People of Color to Become Birdwatchers was published in 2008. “I felt like I didn’t fit in. I felt like I needed permission.” In public, he hid his binoculars inside his coat.

Few recognize this double dose of isolation better than Dudley Edmondson. He wrote and photographed a book, Black and Brown Faces in America’s Wild Places, published in 2006, about 20 African Americans with deep connections to the natural world. One of the stories is his own.

Nature, for Edmondson, provided refuge from what he calls “the trauma from my dad’s alcohol-fueled rages.” He also had a strong sense of being, as he put it, “an odd duck” while growing up in a Black, mostly blue-collar neighborhood in Columbus, Ohio. The kids teased Edmondson, calling him Euell Gibbons, after the celebrated outdoorsman best known for a 1974 national television commercial for Grape Nuts cereal, which he opened by asking, “Ever eat a pine tree?”

Edmondson hadn’t, and he wasn’t a 63-year-old White guy, either. His tormenters simply worked with the material that was available—and that was Whiteness. Edmondson now lives in Duluth, Minnesota, where he frequently comes across strangers who know him because he’s the area’s “Black guy who recreates.” It gives him the sensation of constantly being watched or monitored.

Not long ago, Edmondson was working on a book about Minnesota wildflowers. He was taking images of some invasive species in his own neighborhood, when a White woman challenged his motives.

“You don’t look like any nature photographer I’ve ever seen,” she said.

Edmondson replied, “I’m your neighbor.”

“I’m calling the police,” she said.

It was the first time ­Edmondson recognized the phenomenon “birding while Black,” the close cousin to driving, barbecuing, or sitting in Starbucks while Black.

Edmondson’s friend J. Drew Lanham has had a lifelong obsession with birds and describes himself as a “band geek” who played the bassoon. “I’ve always taken pride in being different,” he says. In exchange, he earned the mantle of the Black birder. His hilarious riff on the stigmatized experience of the African American bird-watcher, “9 Rules of the Black Birdwatcher,” first appeared in Orion magazine and later went viral as a video produced by BirdNote, a public radio series about birds.

A professor of wildlife ecology at Clemson University, Lanham, like Robinson, did not meet another Black birder until he was well into his 40s. He grew up on farmland in South Carolina, frequently encountering birds while passing between his parents’ and his grandmother’s houses. He liked to lie on the ground and gaze up at circling hawks. His grandmother told him they’d peck his eyes out, so when they came within 50 or so yards, he jumped up. “I liked my eyes,” he says. He grew up wanting to fly, tried often, and just as often hurt himself during the attempts.

J. Drew Lanham, left, a professor of wildlife ecology at Clemson University, watches a bald eagle with others at Seattle’s Seward Park. Lanham says he did not meet another Black birder until he was well into his 40s. Photo by Glenn Nelson.

“Birds made me feel good,” says ­Lanham, who in 2016 authored the book The Home Place: Memoirs of a Colored Man’s Love Affair with Nature. “They were going places that I couldn’t go. They were going places I wanted to go. I lived vicariously through them.”

These days, when he’s not flushing bobwhite quail, Lanham likes to talk about range maps for humans, linking the concept of showing geographic distribution of birds to the realities of race in the U.S.—where people of color like him can and cannot be. Not long ago, he added Seattle to his personal range map. That’s where he met Joey Manson in Seward Park, at an event for BirdNote, on whose board Lanham sits. While driving in, Lanham noticed Manson waiting to greet him, but it didn’t register that Manson, a Black man, was the director at the park’s Audubon Center. It was an emotional meeting for both. “This is a place that is willing to be different,” Lanham says.

Seward Park is in one of the most racially diverse areas of Seattle. Manson is the only African American director of any of the 41 Audubon Centers nationally. He grew up in Prince George’s County, Maryland, one of the most affluent African American neighborhoods in the country.

Manson studied glass design at the University of Maryland and ended up in the Puget Sound region, where he got a job running the Audubon store at Seward Park. During his job interview, he stressed that he knew little about birds. Four years later, he’d absorbed enough to be hired as the center’s director, positioning him to break Robinson’s “Don’t Loop” by introducing birds and nature, meaningfully and intentionally, in a highly diverse area of one of the country’s most White—and affluent—major cities.

“[Birds] were going places that I couldn’t go. They were going places I wanted to go.” Manson had two epiphanies along the way. On a ride into work one day, he was wowed by a bald eagle snatching a fish out of Lake Washington. Later, he introduced a kid from his apartment building to the outdoors. Nati, who is from Eritrea, told Manson, “Birds are boring.” That attitude changed when, during an Audubon summer camp to which Manson transported him, Nati saw a pileated woodpecker for the first time. The Woody lookalike supplied an avian turning point for Nati, just as the eagle had for Manson.

Last summer, Manson led a bird walk through Seward Park for the ­Seattle chapter of Outdoor Afro, a national organization seeking to connect African Americans to nature. As part of the prewalk orientation, Manson screened the Lanham video, “Rules of the Black Birdwatcher.” Later, when Manson waxed poetic about hummingbirds and the J-diving mating maneuver of the males, Obra Smith, a teacher originally from Memphis, Tennessee, beamed at every word. Her enthusiasm never waned. “That was amazing,” she said while debriefing with other group members after the outing.

Earlier in the day, during the first bird-related outing in her 49 years of life, Smith had peered into a spotting scope, noted the iridescent throat of an Anna’s hummingbird, and pronounced it a male. She didn’t make such a declaration with utter conviction, but with a hint of doubting intonation. She would delight in being told that she was right as rain—well, it was Seattle, after all.

Two weeks later, Smith returned to Seward Park with Tsion Kahssai of Ethiopia, whom she met at the Outdoor Afro walk. Their second time out, the two Black women sampled the forest’s winged delights on their own.

Photographs:

Tiffany Adams prefers urban birding, often at Seattle’s Hing Hay Park near her home. She is a self-trained ornithologist with a master’s in urban environmental education. She’s also an artist who creates various species of birds out of pipe cleaners.

J. Drew Lanham, left, a professor of wildlife ecology at Clemson University, watches a bald eagle with others at Seattle’s Seward Park

Joey Manson, the director of the Seward Park Audubon Center in Seattle, is the only Black director in the country of an Audubon Center

[liliannorman]

#BlackBirdersWeek seeks to open the outdoors for everyone

A black child grins widely while holding a falcon bigger than his head. A black ecologist stands in waders beside a beaver pond. He’s studying how to help wildlife thrive. A black evolutionary biologist holds a wriggling bat. She’s working in Belize, studying the processes that led to the diversity of life on Earth.

These photos and hundreds more bird facts, questions and experiences are flooding social media. They are part of #BlackBirdersWeek. It’s a movement that is working to promote black birders and nature fans. The social media campaign runs May 31 through June 5. There are Question & Answer sessions with black birders. There’s a Facebook livestream discussion of birding while black. It also offers prompts for sharing photos of birds and being outside in nature on Twitter and Instagram.

#BlackBirdersWeek comes during nationwide protests. People are protesting the deaths of George Floyd, Tony McDade, Breonna Taylor and many other black people at the hands of the police. To the founders of #BlackBirdersWeek, the protests increase the importance and urgency of their campaign.

The founders are a group of black individuals who work in science or related fields. They got together on Twitter, and use the account @BlackAFinSTEM. They began planning #BlackBirdersWeek after May 25. That’s the day that George Floyd was killed. On the same day, Christian Cooper was birding — looking for birds in New York City’s Central Park. Cooper — who is black — saw a white woman with a dog. The dog was not on a leash. Park rules require dogs be leashed.

When Cooper asked the woman to leash her dog, she refused. Soon, she yelled that she was calling the police. She was going “to tell them there’s an African-American man threatening my life.” A confrontation with the police could have been very dangerous for Cooper.

Other black birders found Cooper’s experience very familiar. “What happened to him could have happened to any of us,” says Danielle Belleny. She is a wildlife biologist in San Antonio, Texas. She is also a cofounder of #BlackBirdersWeek.

Here, Danielle Belleny is holding a scaled quail (Callipepla squamata). She says promoting diversity in birding will make the community better for everyone.D. Belleny

Belleny has also had the police called on her while working as a field biologist and while looking for birds. One of her favorite birding memories was the first time she spotted a short-eared owl (Asio flammeus). It’s “a gorgeous bird with brown streaks on its body, striking yellow eyes and these little feather tufts that look like ears on the top of their head,” she says.  She was birding while in Martha’s Vineyard, Mass. But her happy memory has an unhappy portion. A stranger followed her for “looking suspicious.” 

Belleny has always loved the outdoors. “There’s a photo of me holding a huge rat snake as a 4-year-old,” she says. She also loved shows hosted by people like wildlife conservationist Jeff Corwin. But Belleny didn’t see people who looked like her represented in those shows. “I didn’t know wildlife biology was a job I could have.” 

Scientists Say: Stereotype

“I really hate the stereotype that black people don’t do outdoor activities,” Belleny says. “It’s just not true.” A stereotype is a widely held view about something. But just because many people believe something doesn’t mean it’s true. Stereotypes are often myths. Many are based on ideas that have been overly simplified. And stereotypes about black people make it harder for black nature lovers. They can face bias when they try to play, relax and develop their interests in the outdoors.

Belleny continued to feel alone as a black woman in wildlife science. She went to graduate school at Tarleton State University in Stephenville, Texas. After her Master’s degree in wildlife biology, she worked in conservation. “It can be really lonely when you don’t see other people like you,” enjoying and working outside, she says.

Many kinds of science require field work. Scientists go out into natural areas to conduct research. But the people who go into those types of science tend to be white. People who identify as black or African-American received less than 1 percent of the 2018 PhD’s in ecology, evolutionary biology and wildlife biology. That’s according to data from the U.S. National Science Foundation. Belleny loved her work. But “I was really upset about my position and considered changing careers to one I could see more black people in,” she says. 

Sharing joy in the outdoors

Belleny’s doubts disappeared when she joined an online community of black birders and naturalists. It’s the group that would become @BlackAFinSTEM.

“It’s just a place for us to hang out and talk to each other,” she says. Feeling part of a community made a huge difference. And it’s a difference they now seek to share with a bigger online community.

#BlackBirdersWeek aims to show “that black people are outdoors. We do this. We love it. And we take up space,” Belleny says. “I hope young people interested in STEM will see it and realize that they belong here, too.”

Finding her community helped Belleny to continue working as a wildlife biologist. She focuses on biodiversity — making sure there’s a wide variety of species in a natural area. Recently she’s developed plans to help species in Massachusetts that conservationists are worried about. These include the eastern box turtle (Terrapene carolina carolina) and a bird known as the piping plover (Charadrius melodus). 

Five things students can do about racism

“Ecological communities are more resilient when there’s more biodiversity,” Belleny says. Diversity strengthens birding, she explains — and the broader natural science community, too. That’s what #BlackBirdersWeek aims to show. Promoting diversity in birding, she says, “will create a stronger and better community for everyone.”

Black birders in the campaign are using their passion and scientific knowledge to stand together against racism. The response has been overwhelming. Hundreds of black birders, scientists and nature lovers are sharing pictures and stories of being outside and doing what they love. “I’ve shed a couple really happy tears. It’s just so nice to see so many beautiful black faces,” Belleny says. “We deserve to be in this space and we deserve to be safe.”

#BlackBirdersWeek

Check out some of the tweets shared for #BlackBirdersWeek.

A day late but here we go. #PostABird #BlackBirdersWeek #BetterLivingThroughFalconry pic.twitter.com/fMQ6Y80Lo8

— The Falconer (@FalconerFilm) June 2, 2020

#BlackBirdersWeek Day 1: Flashback to me in Belize. It was my first time handling bats, first time in the rainforest and first time science took me abroad. So much joy and freedom can come from spending time in nature. We belong in nature too!#BlackInNature #bats #nature pic.twitter.com/TvWHHtPnmU

— Monique Pipkin (@MoniquePipkin) May 31, 2020

I study evolutionary biology of marine invertebrates and climate change adaptation. First generation. I get to be in the water a lot for work and I love it! On vacation I like to visit my family in French Guyana and enjoy local birds! #BlackInNature #BlackBirdersWeek #PostABird pic.twitter.com/n6wIpZ2Wn1

— Dr. Sarah Lemer (@Sarah_TheSea) June 2, 2020

It’s #BlackBirdersWeek ! While I mainly focus in cellular and molecular biology, I’ve been obsessed with birds ever since my first ecology and ornithology classes. It’s been amazing to see all of you birders that are just like me!

#BlackInNature pic.twitter.com/owxekXICzR

— Sagitterrorist (@lilamoebabe) May 31, 2020

From young, I fostered a deep and abiding love for the natural world. Exploring landscapes; appreciating the beauty of all life through my parents. Now, I research how #rewilding our land with keystone species can help wildlife to thrive#BlackInNature #BlackandSTEM #beavers pic.twitter.com/Hj4g4JEb3S

— Kye Davies (@wildearthnotes) June 1, 2020

My sweet sweet quail children from grad school. Yep I’m a quail person

I love galliforms #PostABird pic.twitter.com/L5DPag3a2u

— Richard Cissel (she/her) (@bellzisbirding) June 1, 2020

It is great to get outside & enjoy nature during #BlackBirdersWeek Whether I am hiking through islands in Sweden, chasing bellbirds in Costa Rica, or watching the birds at my feeders, I am always #BlackInNature Let's show the world that the natural world is a Black space too pic.twitter.com/LponGWxM33

— Milton Newberry, III (@MiltonicDynamo) May 31, 2020

#BlackBirdersWeek seeks to open the outdoors for everyone published first on https://triviaqaweb.tumblr.com/

[frankkjonestx]

A #BlackBirdersWeek cofounder aims to amplify black nature enthusiasts

A black youngster grins widely while holding a falcon bigger than his head. Beside a beaver pond, a black ecologist in waders inspects a sediment core sampler. A bat wriggles in the hands of a black evolutionary biologist doing fieldwork in Belize. 

These photos and hundreds more bird facts, questions and experiences are flooding social media as part of #BlackBirdersWeek, an initiative aimed at recognizing and uplifting black birders and nature enthusiasts. The social media campaign runs May 31 through June 5 and includes Q&A sessions, a Facebook livestream discussion of Birding While Black, and prompts for sharing photos on Twitter and Instagram of birds and being out enjoying nature.

#BlackBirdersWeek comes amid nationwide protests against the deaths of George Floyd, Tony McDade, Breonna Taylor and many other black people at the hands of the police. The protests have elevated the importance and urgency of the campaign for its founders, @BlackAFinSTEM, a Twitter-based group of black individuals who work in science or related fields. They began planning #BlackBirdersWeek in the wake of an incident on May 25 — the same day George Floyd was killed — in which Christian Cooper, a black birder, asked a white woman in New York City’s Central Park to follow park rules on leashing dogs. The woman refused, eventually yelling that she was calling the police “to tell them there’s an African-American man threatening my life.”

Cooper’s experience resonated with other black birders. “What happened to him could have happened to any of us,” says Danielle Belleny, a wildlife biologist in San Antonio, Texas, and a cofounder of #BlackBirdersWeek.

She too has had the police called on her while working as a field biologist and while birding. One of her favorite birding memories — the first time she spotted a short-eared owl (Asio flammeus), “a gorgeous bird with brown streaks on its body, striking yellow eyes and these little feather tufts that look like ears on the top of their head” — while in Martha’s Vineyard, Mass., is marred by the memory of a stranger trailing her for “looking suspicious.” 

“I really hate the stereotype that black people don’t do outdoor activities,” Belleny says. “It’s just not true,” and makes it harder for black nature enthusiasts to recreate, relax and fully develop their interests.

Belleny’s love of the outdoors started early. “There’s a photo of me holding a huge rat snake as a 4-year-old,” she says. Nature shows hosted by people like wildlife conservationist Jeff Corwin further developed her love of nature, but she felt a disconnect because she didn’t see herself represented. “I didn’t know wildlife biology was a job I could have.” 

Feelings of isolation as a black woman in wildlife science continued in graduate school at Tarleton State University in Stephenville, Texas, and her later work in conservation. “It can be really lonely when you don’t see other people like you,” enjoying and working in the outdoors, she says.

Danielle Belleny holds a scaled quail (Callipepla squamata) at the Rolling Plains Quail Research Ranch in Rotan, Texas, in March of 2016.D. Belleny

The field sciences are overwhelmingly white. In 2018, individuals who identify as black or African-American received less than 1 percent of doctorates awarded in the fields of ecology, evolutionary biology and wildlife biology, according to data from the U.S. National Science Foundation. Though Belleny loved her work, “I was really upset about my position and considered changing careers to one I could see more black people in,” she says. 

Belleny’s doubts disappeared once she joined an online community of black birders and naturalists that would become @BlackAFinSTEM. “It’s just a place for us to hang out and talk to each other,” she says. Feeling part of a community made a huge difference — one they now seek to share with the greater online community.

#BlackBirdersWeek aims to amplify and expand that community by showing “that black people are outdoors, we do this, we love it, and we take up space,” Belleny says. “I hope young people interested in STEM will see it and realize that they belong here, too.”

And that community has solidified Belleny’s plan to continue working as a wildlife biologist focused on preserving biodiversity. Recently she has developed management strategies for species of conservation concern, like the eastern box turtle (Terrapene carolina carolina) or piping plover (Charadrius melodus). 

“Ecological communities are more resilient when there’s more biodiversity,” Belleny says. #BlackBirdersWeek aims to show that diversity strengthens birding and the broader field sciences community, too. “We want to advocate for diversity in birding because it will create a stronger and better community for everyone.”

The campaign has allowed black birders to use their passion and expertise to stand in solidarity as a community against racism. The response has been overwhelming, with hundreds of black birders, scientists and nature enthusiasts sharing pictures and stories of them outside doing what they love. “I’ve shed a couple really happy tears. It’s just so nice to see so many beautiful black faces,” Belleny says. “We deserve to be in this space and we deserve to be safe.”

#BlackBirdersWeek

Check out some of the tweets shared for #BlackBirdersWeek.

A day late but here we go. #PostABird #BlackBirdersWeek #BetterLivingThroughFalconry pic.twitter.com/fMQ6Y80Lo8

— The Falconer (@FalconerFilm) June 2, 2020

#BlackBirdersWeek Day 1: Flashback to me in Belize. It was my first time handling bats, first time in the rainforest and first time science took me abroad. So much joy and freedom can come from spending time in nature. We belong in nature too!#BlackInNature #bats #nature pic.twitter.com/TvWHHtPnmU

— Monique Pipkin (@MoniquePipkin) May 31, 2020

I study evolutionary biology of marine invertebrates and climate change adaptation. First generation. I get to be in the water a lot for work and I love it! On vacation I like to visit my family in French Guyana and enjoy local birds! #BlackInNature #BlackBirdersWeek #PostABird pic.twitter.com/n6wIpZ2Wn1

— Dr. Sarah Lemer (@Sarah_TheSea) June 2, 2020

It’s #BlackBirdersWeek ! While I mainly focus in cellular and molecular biology, I’ve been obsessed with birds ever since my first ecology and ornithology classes. It’s been amazing to see all of you birders that are just like me!

#BlackInNature pic.twitter.com/owxekXICzR

— Sagitterrorist (@lilamoebabe) May 31, 2020

From young, I fostered a deep and abiding love for the natural world. Exploring landscapes; appreciating the beauty of all life through my parents. Now, I research how #rewilding our land with keystone species can help wildlife to thrive#BlackInNature #BlackandSTEM #beavers pic.twitter.com/Hj4g4JEb3S

— Kye Davies (@wildearthnotes) June 1, 2020

My sweet sweet quail children from grad school. Yep I’m a quail person

I love galliforms #PostABird pic.twitter.com/L5DPag3a2u

— Richard Cissel (she/her) (@bellzisbirding) June 1, 2020

It is great to get outside & enjoy nature during #BlackBirdersWeek Whether I am hiking through islands in Sweden, chasing bellbirds in Costa Rica, or watching the birds at my feeders, I am always #BlackInNature Let's show the world that the natural world is a Black space too pic.twitter.com/LponGWxM33

— Milton Newberry, III (@MiltonicDynamo) May 31, 2020

from Tips By Frank https://www.sciencenews.org/article/blackbirdersweek-birding-while-black-nature-enthusiasts

[surejaya]

The Feather Thief

Download : The Feather Thief More Book at: Zaqist Book

The Feather Thief by Kirk Wallace Johnson

On a cool June evening in 2009, after performing a concert at London's Royal Academy of Music, twenty-year-old American flautist Edwin Rist boarded a train for a suburban outpost of the British Museum of Natural History. Home to one of the largest ornithological collections in the world, the Tring museum was full of rare bird specimens whose gorgeous feathers were worth staggering amounts of money to the men who shared Edwin's obsession: the Victorian art of salmon fly-tying. Once inside the museum, the champion fly-tier grabbed hundreds of bird skins--some collected 150 years earlier by a contemporary of Darwin's, Alfred Russel Wallace, who'd risked everything to gather them--and escaped into the darkness. Two years later, Kirk Wallace Johnson was waist high in a river in northern New Mexico when his fly-fishing guide told him about the heist. He was soon consumed by the strange case of the feather thief. What would possess a person to steal dead birds? Had Edwin paid the price for his crime? What became of the missing skins? In his search for answers, Johnson was catapulted into a years-long, worldwide investigation. The gripping story of a bizarre and shocking crime, and one man's relentless pursuit of justice, The Feather Thief is also a fascinating exploration of obsession, and man's destructive instinct to harvest the beauty of nature.

Download : The Feather Thief More Book at: Zaqist Book

[duskythesomething]

why u gotta tag me in shit tho

dammit @serket-swapped u ho why i still lov u tho ♥

Name: Dusky

Nickname: Satoshi, Lux

Sign: Aries

Height: 5'3

Hogwarts House: HUFFLEPUFF!! HUFFLEPUFF!! HUFFLEPUFF!!

Favorite Color: turquoise, grey, purple, various soft shades of blue, i’m a big color fan i lov colors

Current Time: 6:30

Cat or Dog?: cats, but i love dogs too!

Favorite Fictional Character: stop don’t do this to me i obsessively rotate favorites like each week i can’t handle this pressure uhhhh i’ll give you a list

Crona Gorgon (Soul Eater)

Death the Kid (Soul Eater)

Clemont (Pokemon XY)

James (Team Rocket)

Kyoya (Ouran)

Mori (Ouran)

Favorite Singer/Band: shit man i love music

Nothing More

Fall Out Boy

Panic! at the Urie

Adam Lambert

lots of other shit i’m forgetting

Dream Job: ornithology! i wanna study birds~ or graphic design tbh i have no idea what i’m doing with life When was this blog created?: uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh?? What made you decide to make a Tumblr?: i used to use ifunny a fuckton before getting tired of it and leaving. i wanted to be a ‘cool kid’ on tumblr and now i sit here crying with mutuals, a true, Cool Kid™ Why did you pick your URL?: well you see my very first ifunny username was Duskyumbreon02, yeah? and like, i always liked the Dusky part.when i wanted to make a youtube channel i figured having a three part name would sound nicer and had no fuckin idea what to put so,, i just put something. literally. i don’t know who i am now or who i will be later, but heck, i’ll be something. that’s my take on things.

(that ifunny username was also how i picked my preferred name!!)

@pikachu-noises @outlawed-melodies @neilnordegraf @stuck-on-the-internet i have no clue if y’all been tagged yet or not but hey here you go if u wanna idk

[biofunmy]

Sydney Is for the Birds. The Bigger and Bolder, the Better.

SYDNEY — The bushy pair of laughing kookaburras that used to show up outside my daughter’s bedroom window disappeared a few months ago.

The birds simply vanished — after rudely waking us every morning with their maniacal “koo-koo-kah-KAH-KAH” call, after my kids named them Ferrari and Lamborghini, after we learned that kookaburras mate for life.

And here’s the odd thing: I missed them.

This is not normal, at least not for me, but Sydney has a rare superpower: It turns urbanites into bird people, and birds into urbanites. Few other cities of its size (five million and counting) can even come close to matching Sydney’s still-growing population of bold, adaptable and brightly colored squawkers.

“We’ve got a lot of large conspicuous native birds that are doing well and that is very unusual globally,” said Richard Major, the principal research scientist in ornithology for the Australian Museum in Sydney. “It’s quite different in other cities around the world.”

The reasons — some natural, others man-made — are fascinating, and we’ll get to them. But lest anyone doubt Mr. Major’s assertion, at a time when the bird population of North America is suffering a steep decline, compare a typical day of avian interactions in Sydney with anywhere else.

Morning here begins with a chorus. Relentlessly chirpy, the noisy miner blasts the alarm before dawn alongside the screeching and flapping of rainbow lorikeets, parrots brighter than Magic Markers and that argue like toddlers. And of course, there are the kookaburras, with their cackles carrying across neighborhoods declaring: “This is MY territory!”

A walk to the car or train may require dodging attacking magpies — in spring, they swoop down on your head to protect their young — and rarely does a week go by without seeing a sulphur-crested cockatoo, or a dozen, spinning on a wire like an escaped circus act.

Even the local scavenger is extraordinary. As grubby as any New York pigeon but much grander, the white ibis, known here as a “bin chicken,” is a hefty, prehistoric-looking creature with a curved beak.

It’s a remarkable mix.

Even as ornithologists point out that some small birds are struggling in the city, they note that a generation or two ago, Sydney didn’t have nearly as much avian diversity as it does today, nor as many flocks of birds that have mastered what city living requires: competitiveness, an obsession with real estate and the ability to adapt.

Why so many birds are thriving here is increasingly a subject of international study. Scientists believe it is due in part to how Sydney was settled — relatively recently, compared with many global cities, with less intrusion into wildlife habitats.

The luck of local terrain has helped. Sydney’s rocky coastline didn’t lend itself to clearing land for agriculture, which slowed development and left lots of native plants untouched. Australia’s early leaders also set up large national parks near Sydney, protecting bushland for animals of all kinds.

But making the city a bird capital was probably not on their agenda. The British colonialists in charge hated the sound of Sydney’s birds enough to import songbirds like common starlings to soothe their tender ears.

Today, some early examples of those imports, from the 1860s, are stuffed and tagged in the Australian Museum’s collection room. When I stopped by one recent morning, Leah Tsang, the museum’s ornithology collection manager, sifted through the white metal cabinets containing the taxidermy archives to show me the supposed improvement sent from Europe.

The juvenile starlings in the tray looked small, dark and … dull.

A few cabinets over, Dr. Tsang showed me her own favorite bird — the princess parrot, a lovely Australian specimen of soft pastels, in pink, blue and green.

If the young starling’s feathers evoked the lackluster mood of a Benjamin Disraeli portrait, the princess parrot was Elton John.

“I had one as a pet when I was a kid,” said Dr. Tsang, 40, who sported some bold plumage herself, a shock of electric blue hair in a ponytail. “Its name was Cheeky.”

She told me she came to birds late in life, at least as a career. She worked in technology for nearly a decade before ditching it for the birds.

“You want to do something that fulfills you and makes you happy,” she said, standing near a display of little penguins (yes, balmy Sydney has penguins, too). She paused, and later told me she worried about sounding like a cliché.

But there’s no need to ashamed of bird-loving. Not in Sydney.

That afternoon, I went for a walk in the city’s Centennial Parklands with John Martin, an ornithologist with the University of New South Wales who is working on a project looking at how Sydney’s cockatoos have adapted, learning to open garbage bins and knock on windows to ask people for food.

We stopped near a wetland in the park’s center. In less than an hour, we saw 20 species of birds — and old friends, Ann Birrell and Carol Bunton, who are park regulars.

They surprised me with their knowledge of not just kinds of birds, but individual ones — two owls that had nested in an oak; a tawny frogmouth they had gotten to know; and the corellas flying overhead, pecking, wrestling and mating in the trees.

“There are ménage à troises,” observed Ms. Bunton, a retiree walking with a cane, nodding toward the corellas. “We’re interested in their behavior.”

Dr. Martin walked us over to one of the ponds where ducks and other birds gather. He pointed out a white ibis with a yellow plastic number tag on its wing. “That’s Lennie,” he said.

Lennie had been tagged as part of a study aiming to understand why Sydney seemed to have so many of these so-called bin chickens. The public sees them as a nuisance, but according to Dr. Major at the Australian Museum, they only started to appear in Sydney in the 1970s.

Researchers eventually discovered that the white ibis loves carbohydrates, making it a match for a city of fish and chips. But the big birds were also refugees of a sort; they had moved to Sydney because their natural wetland habitat further inland had been dried out by drought and heavy-handed water management.

“We’re not sure if it’s climate change or not, but what we do know is that the coast has always been a refuge,” Dr. Martin said.

Sydney is not ideal for all. Tiny birds like the superb fairy-wren, with its bright blue markings, seem to be declining because they need brambles and weeds to hide in, and urbanization tends to cut that away.

But for larger and more territorial birds, Sydney is quite comfortably home.

At one point in the park, we walked by a group of parrots with bright pink heads. They were galahs, which has become slang for lovable doofus. They didn’t make a sound, nor did they mind me getting within inches of them.

Many of Sydney’s birds seem to like their human neighbors. Scientists have determined magpies can form friendships with people. Cockatoos are highly social too.

I was wondering if the same was true for kookaburras, and then, as I was finishing this article, Ferrari and Lamborghini returned. They showed up just before dark and took their perch near my daughter’s window. They nuzzled. They screeched their unique good night and good morning. It’s quite a racket. But we’re hoping they stay.

Sahred From Source link Travel

from WordPress http://bit.ly/2M7afAB via IFTTT

[blograzorwit]

Jest A Minute (21/9/2017) from Subroto Mukherjee

Putting Out The Fire -- And Firemen.--------------------------------------------------- A blaze broke out at a film studio, fire-engines dashed there and it took the firemen a couple of hours to put out the fire. After that, the firemen got chatting with all the stars there -- and, well,  it took another couple of hours to put the firemen out! *** R K's All Rounders----------------------------- A fire burned down Raj Kapoor-ji's iconic R K Studios. Sad. But you know what's sadder? The idealism, the passion, the FIRE with which that great showman blazed a trail -- that burned out long ago with his passing. *** As a film-maker, Raj-ji was greatly influenced by another icon of cinema -- Charlie Chaplin. Influenced by the biting, socio-political commentary and satire behind Chaplin's slapstick comedy. *** In current times, Raj-ji's studio was being run by his three sons -- Dabboo-ji, Chintoo-ji and Chimpoo-ji! I like to view them as The Tree Stooges running a studio! No wonder, when the fire started at the studio, no one had a clue where the fire-extinguishers were kept, where to find them or how to handle them. *** No wonder Raj-ji was known as The Showman. After all, he was a complete film-maker, a film-maker well-versed and thorough in every department of film-making. In other words, Raj-ji was an all-rounder. Of course, the same can be said for his accomplished sons -- that they too are all-rounders. Sure, they are all-rounders but largely in the physical, spherical sense -- they are all so ROUND. *** Outlaws and Disorder------------------------------- Is there law and order in Bengaluru?  Of course there is. Trouble is, from time to time, a criminally fanatic religious cult takes over the law and order. It not only makes the LAWS but also gives the ORDERS to hit-men! *** Loo-k Who's Taking Sneak Peeks!------------------------------------------------- A couple of women who visited a famous church in Mumbai raised hell after spotting a surveillance camera in the ladies' washroom. A priest of this church clarified that this camera was installed to deter theft. Theft from a toilet? What would thieves steal from a toilet -- the turds from the potty? OK, this camera was a measure taken against stealing. But, hey, what about the other kind of stealing? I mean, what about the church custodians using this camera to steal furtive sneak peeks into the ladies' loo? *** The Caveman's Skeletons-------------------------------------- The skeletons are now tumbling not from the closet but from the 'cave' -- the opulent 'cave', the luxurious villain's den of the rogue 'godman' now behind bars.   Out there, cops have turned up an underground tunnel which this 'godman' used to access his private 'harem' of female devotees! For orgies galore, what else? OK, if you don't like the words 'orgies' or 'harem', let's call it a temple. A temple where entry was welcome for this hedonist guru and -- ooh la la -- nirvana guaranteed! *** Highly Suspicious-------------------------- Also it turns out that this hairy-scary 'godman' sent 17 corpses to the Lucknow medical college -- without death certificates! Oh my God! So many dead bodies but no death certificates  Highly suspicious, to say the least!  How did those poor people die? The finger of suspicion naturally points straight at this disgraced 'godman'. But if you ask me, this 'godman' had nothing to do with those deaths. If this 'godman' really wanted those 17 persons dead, he would not have sent their dead bodies to the Lucknow medical college. Instead, he'd have sent all those 17 persons ALIVE to a Gorakhpur hospital. After all, who can survive in a Gorakhpur hospital? *** Soakers All In A Row------------------------------- We have all heard the expression 'a sucker is born everyday', have we not? Sure we have. But if we go by Harvey, Irma, Jose and Katia -- all those big, drenching, soaking storms being born one after the other -- you'd think a SOAKER is also born everyday! *** Fast Food---------------- A poor elephant was made to beg in Mumbai streets by its owner. And the elephant was gobbling up all the fast food (like 200 vada pavs daily) offered by Mumbaikars who took pity on the creature. Ha, no wonder it's called fast food. The way this elephant put on 700 kilos in excess weight -- in no time! *** Ladies Love Midgets?--------------------------------- You'd think women go for men who are tall, dark and handsome -- right? Wrong. Well, at least according to a study conducted in the West, women actually prefer short men. Short, dark and pudgy. In that case, listen up, ladies : the perfect place for you would be the Denkali jungle in those Phantom comics. That place is full of pygmies! *** Mushrooming Nuclear Capability-------------------------------------------- After testing a series of nuke warheads and even an H-bomb, Kim Jong-un threw a grand banquet for his scientists and engineers. Obviously the North Korean big teddy of a daddy felt celebrations were in order for the country's nuclear success in making so much mushroom cloud. So, hey, no prizes for guessing what was the main course at this gala dinner? Right -- mushrooms! *** After Bloody Next?---------------------------- We know the woods of Bollywood is teeming with a dominant species called copycats. Hard at work xeroxing everything from Hollywood. Now some of the creatures are burrowing underground seeking content from the underworld.   So now our poor audience has to suffer through Daddy -- a grand-daddy of a bad film about a big daddy of a baddy who once prowled the Mumbai underworld. And as if it was not enough making all those films in the past featuring nasty gangster Dawood, some film maker has now made a film about his infamous sister Haseena Parkar! What next? A film about Dawood's pet cat called Scary Mouser or his pet dog named Noisy Barker? *** The Poor Man's Leader----------------------------------- Modi-ji's right arm, Amit Shah-ji claims our great leader Modi-ji's heart beats for the poor. Wonderful! Splendid! I am so moved to hear this! But while our great leader's heart beats for the poor, it would seem his mind is obsessed with, and busy playing with, expensive toys like high-speed trains from Japan. Oh shucks, too bad our poor will never be able to afford to ride that train! *** Pathetic Spineless Jellyfish Culture--------------------------------------------------- In the last election, our great leaders made big promises to curtail the extravagance of our VIP culture. So what happened to that? As usual, nothing. This is where the ratio stands today : there are 3 cops for every VIP while only one 1 cop to safeguard every 600 citizens!   Simple question : what is the criterion for being a leader? True grit, genuine guts, courage. If you lack courage, you have no business being a leader!     So why do our brave leaders need a wall of bodyguards 24/7 as protection? What does the acronym VIP really stand for? VERY INSECURE PARANOID? If you ask me, the acronym VIP merits being changed to PSJ -- PATHETIC SPINELESS JELLYFISH! ***       Lucknow Mental--------------------------- Seen Lucknow Central? No, I have not. Because my interest in ornithology (pretty birds) does not extent to jailbirds. But you know what I'd love to see? I'd love to see someone like Vijay Mallya in a place like Lucknow Central.     You know what? Someone should now make a film entitled Lucknow Mental because certain film makers here in Bollywood (I mean those who make films like Daddy and Haseena Parker) deserve -- richly deserve -- to be cast in such a movie. ***