#the male queer folks

[savnofilter]

i think i might actually drop some headcannons... havent done those in so long. maybe it'll help gaslighting me into writing a full fic or smt. 🤷🏽‍♀️

[hillbillyoracle]

So I saw this screencap earlier

And I thought it was a great chance to talk about something.

A lot of progressive folks are familiar with the fact that right wing circles use feminine as a derogatory term and that there's a real cost to that for women.

What people are less familiar with is how it hurts men - queer and straight, cis and trans.

And I'm not shocked given how common it is in left leaning spaces to be reactionary (read: dismissive or outright harass) when men try to talk about these what these issues look like for them.

When men talk about how they've experienced toxic masculinity and anti-feminine bias, in addition to the usual right wing responses, I'm starting to see a bunch of supposed feminists and trans/queer allies harass them as well - saying they're hurting women/feminine presenting folks by "centering men", dismissing their concerns as made up (even when there's research to back it up), "why aren't you talking about what this is like for cis and trans women instead??".

I've seen trans men accused of being TERFs or being liars (by other trans people even - wtf) when they talk about their experiences of allies actively excluding them from trans spaces or harassing them for using T4T tags. I've seen men be accused of lying about publicly accessible clinical research that shows men make up 75%-77% of suicide cases - or worse suggest they deserve it. I see posts about how men's complaints "aren't unique to them" and dismiss them because women also suffer things those authors assume are the same (even when the research contradicts this).

And here's the thing:

When you assume feminine=good/safe/gentle and masculine=bad/unsafe/enemy - you're parroting a conservative talking point.

There is no way around this fact.

A big part of what underpins child rearing being "the woman's domain" in conservatism, is the idea that men are inherently dangerous and therefore shouldn't really be around children without women present.

The reason why they blame women for abuse and rape - because they believe men are inherently dangerous and if a woman trusted them then it's her fault.

Part of why women have been effectively banned from many trades and careers for so long is the assumption that being around that many men presents an inherent danger to a woman.

"But!" you might be saying, "This person is clearly talking about men engaging in open conflict as good here!"

Yeah because conservatives see politics as an inherently male/dangerous/toxic sphere and uphold it as such.

I could go on and on really.

All of this is to say - please be more thoughtful in what you consume, comment, and reblog.

There are experiences specific to being masculine. Erasing that is one, a dick move, but two, particularly violent toward those talking about trans masculine, minority masculine, disabled masculine, and queer masculine experiences.

All privilege comes at a cost. Listening when people talk about that cost is key building a new more fair reality. Seeing the privilege is not worth the cost makes fervent allies. Want more allies? Don't be a dick to people having that realization.

Push back against the assumption of woman=good and man=bad when you see it - especially in community spaces. The amount of times I've seen domestic violence services only available to women is insane...

Do not let identarian politics blind you to the fact we're all human and working toward our own liberation should not come at the oppression of another. Believe me, those with real power would much rather you stay raging out at men in a similar class with you than directing your efforts at them.

The right wing wants you to believe it's either/or. Fuck that - it's both/and.

[tygerland]

[angel-archivist]

It's so interesting and so exceedingly frustrating how agab is being utilized now within the queer community as a way to isolate and sort nonbinary and genderqueer folks into binary boxes that determine their moral purity levels, and their authority to do and write and exist.

The way nonbinary writers are being put under accusation of fetishizing gay men while their AGAB is continually brought up in a way that feels like queer-space-approved misgendering.

The way feminist circles that are supposedly trans-inclusive will use the word AFAB in a way that implicitly but intentionally isolates nonbinary people who aren't AFAB from joining. It's for women*.

The way the language is already flawed and leaves out intersex folks from the conversations while focusing on a binary of sex that isn't truthful.

The constant obsessing over whether someone is AFAB or AMAB and whether or not that gives them the privilege to join, do, write, or be present in certain spaces really really concerns me. How are we supposed to dismantle a binary system of gender if we can't even move past forcibly assigning and focusing on people's genders assigned at birth?

[imaginal-ai]

"Winged Spirit" (0003)

(More of The Fae Folk Series)

0002

0001

[ratbastardman]

every reactionary leftist needs to be handed a dvd copy of deathnote because like if your first step to saving the world is deciding who needs to be protected and who needs to be eliminated my brother in christ you’ve got the moral compass of a fucked up teenager raised by a cop

[loptrcoptr]

Tumblr fandom logic these days: if two characters with different sets of genitals hook up, then they’re straight and cis and the ship is hetero and it’s all Bad and Boring and Problematic

My old tired bi ass:

“All that matters is what’s in your pants” is not the great woke take y’all seem to think it is!!!

[twilightarcade]

if I was a character I would've gotten non binary headcannoned so hard

[wavebiders]

LRT that is such a thing with queer fandom spaces tho. It's like that post that's all "yeah your story is so gay but how are you treating your female characters" you know?

like yeah it's great that this is the queer fandom website but a good chunk of the time that just means placing a lot of focus on the white guys and that's still not great lmao

[guesswho334455667788]

[blazeeblake]

Something mostly (?) unrelated to rancid fandom behavior that’s been stuck in my brain a bit:

I wholeheartedly agree that it’s important for fiction to show men/masc characters in emotionally vulnerable and supportive relationships with one another, while keeping it platonic. Absolutely. I do sometimes feel that this stance is a kissing cousin of the goofy rallying cry of “let men be just friends,” that gains traction anytime gay relationships are contemplated in media , albeit to a lesser degree. I also think that this sudden platonic representation is sometimes undertaken in a disingenuous way that allows people involved in the direction of a narrative (show runners, networks, etc) to hand wave away established romantic subtext and tropes being applied between two male characters. It just smacks of not understanding the difference between platonic and romantic love when you take the “default” pairings/dynamics away, and I think it’s a disservice to both instances. Again, this isn’t always the case, but I’ve seen it happen enough times for it to hit some stupid little nerve in me when I get a whiff of it.

I don’t know, maybe this should have stayed a draft but I kind of wanted to unburden my brain of it 🤷🏽‍♀️.

[un-pearable]

pixal, making her new body look butch as fuck bc she’s definitely just committing to nya’s bit and keeping an ironclad secret identity, no other reason: hehe he. hehe :]

[well-fed-twink]

[fabulouslygaybean]

abortion has officially been banned in my state. i don't know what to do now. this place just gets worse every day and im totally crushed

[lesamis]

a good long while ago @sadpizazz tagged me to list five songs i currently listen to, then tag ten more people - i've discovered some new favourites lately so this was v fun to think about!

the arcadian wild | liar spotify has been really into recommending me a personalized "melancholic mix" lately (thanks) and this song feels like it got stuck on the insides of my eyelids. songs to weep alone at night to. phenomenal bridge.

mcr | hang 'em high when mx way said "that girl's not right in the brain / mass convulsions strike the choir by the grace of god" he did that for me specifically

the trials of cato | gawain one of the coolest songs i've found this year; i really love the quiet (badly mixed lmao) start & the escalation throughout. and the lyrics? "just a small town shame / the land that once you loved is not the same"? thank you kings

joan baez | sad-eyed lady of the lowlands her version of this has a special place in my heart and also i think every song should be at least ten minutes long like, in general

lilli furfaro | empty vessels actually i highly recommend this artist in general bc she has nowhere near the listeners she deserves, but also for the fact that she seems to mostly tweet about critical role in her downtime which is a whole vibe

tagging @starkey, @kazimirov, @gellavonhamster, @byrons, @percybysshes, @bookish-huntress, @campgender, @silverskyy, @larkspurgf & @pyrrhlc if anyone feels like sharing w the class. 🌼

[mythicalcoolkid]

"Noooo what if this person is actually cis and only using they/them for clout???" CIS PEOPLE ARE ALSO ALLOWED TO USE THEY/THEM