#the light on the reference pic was so divine

[lechaze]

cat found in the wild

[hoarah-babylon]

First DLC session completed!!!!! Gonna talk about my findings under the cut

Waiting for me at the cocoon was a familiar face from the trailers. Hi Leda!!!!!!! Got to have a closer look at her armour, her belt looks just like Miquella's ring.

The converging gold threads on the cape made me think of the Miquella's needle, and also the Godslayer Greatsword

She told me to go touch his wrinkly arm so I did. I was expecting a cutscene but no, just gave it a little tap and off we were! Which is also fine, I think I was just hoping for the interaction with the arm to reveal something about the nature of how we got to the shadow realm.

When I got there though..... man

I honestly wasn't expecting my own reaction when I got to the first open area, but I cried. Like actual tears. I just love this game and experiencing new things from it I don't know man it just took me by surprise, I've been having a hard time lately too so I think it was partly relief just to have something that makes me feel happy and inspired. Thankful for this game! Ok anyway

THE WICKER MAN ! I did try fighting him later on but he's so tough. I'm leaving him for later for sure, I have no idea what to do with him right now. His attacks are undodgeable and flatten me almost immediately, I'll figure that out later. He's cool tho. I think an item I found later called him a 'fire golem'

FOUND THE BESTIES ! They had a health bar so I could have tried to kill them but I didn't even try because they are my friends. Anyway they were in front of a Mausoleum with a boss in it which surprised me I was like ALREADY?????? I think it was called Blackgaol Knight. He took me a WHILE. I kept telling myself go away and come back later, but I was locked in, like no he's going to perish now. But I got him eventually and the reward was great. I mean I can't use any of it with this build but the item descriptions... they got me thinking

Warriors of what army/loyalty? What does it mean to lose your name, or your heart? This wording is very... intriguing to me. The only other mention of hearts in ER I remember off the top of my head (aside from dragon hearts) is the DLC trailer that said Miquella shrives clean the hearts of men. HM.

So they lose their hearts by choice, but what does it mean to lose your heart? Like, literally? Figuratively? Spiritually? But I found this next part to be the most intriguing. The 'light of birth'... WHAT. DO YOU MEAN. The concept of birth in TLB has always confused me tbh, so to have something directly reference birth caught my eye immediately. And why is it apparently so revered by these knights? I have to find out more. Mama lets research :) I don't remember where I heard/read this but I remember it being theorised births came from the Erdtree rather than the typical way humans are born usually. Could it be these knights revere birth as it used to happen, as opposed to how births came to be post-Golden Order creation? Hm.

I found one of the enemies that was posted before release! The one with the uterus imagery. This one. I was surprised it was a regular enemy, from the pic we saw it looked like a boss to me. It was just chilling on one of the monuments in the field of wheat. 'Invoke divinity' stands out to me, mainly because I can't figure out what it means. If it invokes divinity, what does it define as divine? It can't be anything to do with the Erdtree, because it clearly rejects it. Super interesting. The fact it also makes you weaker to Sleep is also v interesting

New weapon type (I think)! I got jumpscared by a screaming enemy and they dropped this. I'm ngl though I think he was a bit bugged, he wasn't dodging any spells so I beat him pretty easily. oops. I'm noticing a lot of bestial enemies and items though... I picked up a bestial ash of war later on too. Who are 'the horned warriors'?

Was looking out over a cliff-edge and saw this dead dragon... it honestly gagged me because I did not expect to see dragons. Which in hindsight is maybe a bit silly of me considering Messmer has what looks like Draconic eyes. But anyway

I found what looked like a church of Marika. It was called something like 'church of consolation'. On the lead-up there were several of Messmer's warriors resting in the road. They weren't aggro to me unless I attacked first. The bigger knight in the church dropped a huge hammer that was imbued with holy damage. One of the smaller knights dropped a chestpiece

The phrasing 'forced to wage war' is intriguing - where did these people come from? Exactly how and why were they forced?

I found this nearby the church and it gagged me a bit. First of all mad that this kind of item exists, I wonder how many there are. Secondly, Marika made these for Messmer... but never again????? I'm so intrigued by their relationship, I need to understand their dynamic IMMEDIATELY

Honestly thank god they're giving us more Larval Tears. I was stressing about this even though I probably won't end up using them... we'll see what weapons I pick up. I wonder if they replenish at these sites or if they'll still be a finite resource

Shit's fucked. These people were done dirty by Messmer

But consider: this place is gorgeous despite the horrors

Found the first of Miquella's crosses! And met another follower of Miquella... why does he hate me :( is it cus I'm Tarnished? But like. I don't like the Erdtree either dude. You don't know me!!!!!!!!!! Nice armour tho. And accent. And thanks for showing me where the crosses are. I guess. Map referred to him as a 'hornsent'

Like. Ok. Why don't we just be friends. Mysterious guy. Whatever like I care.

!!!!! I thought I took a pic of the description but whatever it said something along the lines of 'a young shoot heavy with Empyrean blood. Left behind by the wounded Miquella'... so he's wounded even in this shadow realm, whatever form he's in. What are you doing fam... what's the deal....... I gotta know

Met Freyja! She was nicer. I love her Spartan gear. She said she once fought alongside Radahn (!!!) and didn't tell me much else. But she seems chill af

Now this guy... I've gotta know his deal. Ansbach, what do you MEAN you were formerly in service to Mohg. And now you're following Miquella. WHAT IS THAT BROTHER. I just... the implications???? Why did you leave Mohg? When? Were you in on the whole abduction thing? Why does your helmet/beard combo kinda make you look like Cthulhu? I have questions.

Man-fly village. Uh........ yep don't like this.

That last line sticks out to me, because of the whole, you know, Miquella the Kind thing. Be kind and ya don't get turned into a fly. Cool cool I'm uncomfortable

Oh cool the thing on the wicker ma- THE FELL GOD OF FIRE???? Is this referring to the Giant's outer god? Or one we haven't heard of yet, one that Messmer is aligned with? Haunts the sagas of the hornsent... isn't that what the guy that was shit-talking me earlier is? What is his deal. I'm not immune to a mysterious man

Blue skies?? in MY shadow realm???? it's more likely than you think :)

I also found a ghostflame dragon too which was cool but he has SO much health. I simply did not have the patience for it at that moment. But it's cool seeing so many different things from different backgrounds and allegiances.

My fave thing about the followers so far is how everyone comes from such diverse backgrounds, it's in-keeping with Miquella's whole ethos of welcoming all. But... why are they all here? How? Why has Miquella 'called' to them? Has Miquella called to them all? Now I have all these strangers motivations to worry about as well as the blonde baby's. But really I'm so excited to find more. This already has my brain whirring and I haven't even stumbled across a major boss yet!!! fromsoft you've done it again!!!!!!

[tragedicna]

sucks in deep breathe . . . can't stop thinking about them so here's the list with a pic and a blurb and it's an invite to come write with them .

gods , deities , immortals , and overpowered muses edition . honorable mention : you huo

AKIMI -- a tiger deity with the ability to shapeshift and wield fire to their pleasing . . . a former royalty and worshipped by their people as a guardian , they received divinity through lineage . currently feels undeserving of their position

GUIZHONG -- the god of dust , she would never refer to herself as a god of creation , in spite of her ingenious inventions and creations . a woman that sought knowledge and gained divinity through recognition .

SNEZHANA -- the sovereign of a blizzarding land , a god with the ability to manipulate ice ; a monarch that just wants the best for her people and yet remains DISLIKED by many for her seemingly tyrannical rule .

BAIYIN -- the heroine goddess that lays forgotten by many , sealed in a shrine of darkness . the goddess of fortune and safety , of light and harmony , of happiness and good health . . .

HEIYANG -- the vengeful god that laid waste to those who sealed away his sister , brimming with anger as he remains incapable of releasing her seal . the god of misfortune and danger , of anger and vengeance , of pestilence and darkness . . .

YONGLIANG -- more commonly known by his peers as LIGHT BEARER  ,  he sacrificed himself for the greater good  .  fighting evil and keeping bad karma at bay  ,  he ends up being corrupted by the miasma and succumbs to the corruption  .  to prevent his descent into madness  ,  he was sealed away in a maze while his lover seeks a way to reverse the damage  .

DOKJA -- a man with omniscient knowledge of a world he got transported in  ,  not knowing he was the man that created said world  .  a man who thinks himself as just a supporting character but is actually the universe's creator  .

HUIYING -- a messenger of death and guide to the afterlife  ,  her immortality was gained through good deeds and cultivation  .  she's prayed to for a painless death and to help souls cross into the afterlife  ,  protecting the purity of souls and the safety of the living  .  she's often called upon during one's last rites before burial and she always attends funerals she's called to  .

LUMINE -- the abyssal princess that searched the continent for her brother for 500 years  ,  experiencing the harshness of a world lacking kindness and a pantheon of GODS that lack compassion  .  seeking to destroy the world of teyvat  ,  she works against her brother  ,  who's seeking to save teyvat  .

DAN HENG -- or better known as YINGYUE-JUN or simliarly  ,  IMBIBITOR LUNAE  ,  the dragon lord that became a criminal in his own land for committing a crime he no longer remembers  .  reincarnated in his current body and carrying just an inkling that he's a fugitive  ,  he has yet to face his past  .

BIMING -- a wandering god of the lost children  ,  he's known to be seen in crowds at fesitvities or marketplaces  ,  a near invisible being that could only be seen by the lost  .  though while he is known as a patron god of the LOST  ,  many find him to be a guardian god of children  ,  often praying to him for protection of one's own offspring  .  he currently resides on the outskirts of town  ,  helping at an orphanage  .

[loveinthesecretgarden]

I had the greatest day/ night yesterday.

Somehow I was lucky enough to be invited to MICHIGAN FASHION WEEK....!!!! And as a VIP guest! Obviously I spent 3/5 days last week shopping, putting together the most perfect, yet effortless, outfit to coordinate with my date. He, being a guy, decided on pairing navy pants, a creme shirt, with a navy jacket, which took him about 5 minutes. His gold chain added a tasteful touch. He looked like an exec sitting courtside at a game- serious, casual, and clean.

I spent about 5 hours at the mall then dragged my sister to Von Maur to pick out the perfect pair of shoes and a nice bag. I didn't get to wear my after party outfit (which was totally giving Blair Waldorf). Whatever. Pre-Event shopping might be one of the greatest vibes. I was on a mission. Plus- my sister's got great taste and being advised by her is a magical thing. You leave satisfied.

So Friday at around 7 we arrived at the Eastern Market Shed 3. Gift bags were being handed to us, there were models posing on cars, and the sea of people ahead were wearing the most fabulous outfits I've ever seen. The air was filled with smoke and lights. I felt completely exhilarated and at peace. In all of the many places and situations this world has to offer, I feel the best in ones just like these.

Photo for reference.

Ok. The show was AMAZING. Yes I'm a total optimist and truly believe most things people do and create is inevitably fantastic. But when I tell youuuuu how stunning some of these dresses were. Daydreams of wearing them at picnics, raves, fabulous clubs and underground concerts were constant. Galas and balls and cuddled up in bed. I had this realization: ART and FASHION is goddamn divine. I mean how beautiful is it, that people dedicate their time to making our lives so colorful and intricate and lovely! Clothing, more than most other things, represents the complexity of humans, the parallels between cherishing our history and celebrating how far we've come, the tension between our traditions and our newfound freedom. Clothing is more than expression. It's passion, engineering, reason, and time itself personified. It's so awesome. I'll go into details on some of the designers on one of my next posts.

+My outfit pic. Pants are from Pull & Bear, Shirts are from Banana Republic & VICI, and bag is Vince Camuto.

If anyone who ends up reading this is from the Detroit area in Michigan-- HMU!

With Love

Elisa

[portalibis]

ROSICRUCIAN APOLOGISTS: ROBERT FLUDD

"The central figure of Rosicrucian literature, towering as an intellectual giant above the crowd of souffleurs, theosophists, and charlatanic professors of the magnum opus, who, directly or otherwise, were connected with the mysterious Brotherhood, is Robertus de Fluctibus, the great English mystical philosopher of the seventeenth century, a man of immense erudition, of exalted mind, and, to judge by his writings, of extreme personal sanctity.

Ennemoser describes him as one of the most distinguished disciples of Paracelsus, but refuses to number him with "those consecrated theosophists who draw all wisdom from the fountain of eternal light." He does not state his reasons for this depreciatory judgment, and the brief and inadequate notice which he gives of Fludd's system displays such a cursory acquaintance with the works in which it is developed, that it is doubtful whether he had taken pains to understand his author. I should rank the Kentish mystic second to none among the disciples of the "divine" Theophrastus, while in the profundity and extent of his learning, there can be no question that he far surpassed his master, who is said to have known little but to have divined almost everything, and who is, therefore, called divinus, in the narrower sense of that now much abused term."

"On the title-page of the "Summum Bonum," there is a large Rose on which two bees have alighted, with this motto above - Dat Rosa mel apibus. The book treats of the noble art of magic, the foundation and nature of the Cabala, the essence of veritable alchemy, and of the Causa Fratrum Roseæ Crucis. It identifies the palace or home of the Rosicrucians with the Scriptural house of wisdom. Ascendamus ad montem rationabilem, et ædificemus domum Sapientiæ. The foundation of the mountain thus referred to is declared to be the Lapis angularis, the corner-stone, cut out of the mountain without hands. This stone is Christ. It is the spiritual palace which the Rosicrucians desire to reveal, and is therefore no earthly or material abode.

There is a long disquisition on the significance of the Rose and the Cross, a purely spiritual interpretation being adopted. At the conclusion, the writer anticipates the question whether he himself is a brother of the Rose Cross, since he has settled all questions as to their religion and symbolism. His answer is that he least of any has deserved such a grace of God; if it have pleased God to have so ordained it, it is enough."

Text source: The Real History of the Rosicrucians, by Arthur Edward Waite, c. 1887

1) Pic. source: Portrait of Robert Fludd

2) Pic. source: Summum Bonum, c. 1629, by Robert Fludd

[vulpes-incendium]

I made this long time ago, but I thought it's a good time to share it here for @aphasiaweek!

I chose 《Hoi Sam☆Nice Guy》over 《Maji Kandou☆Hong Kong Night》because there are more stuff about HK in it. So let's see if the lyrics are accurate in a native's point of view!

Spoiler alert: it's very accurate

Hoi Sam = Happy (in Cantonese)

Guy = sounds like street in Cantonese (gaai1)

“Yooooo, so since there’s a song… while I’m at it I kinda put some effort into my costume… I think I’ve got like, serious swag Pardon? You can’t see me…for real? Woah!!!!”

FASHION: yes, HKers love to be trendy, always want to be on top trends! Trends come and go very very quickly, it's seriously really hard to follow trends in HK.

MIXING ENGLISH WITH CANTONESE: yup, we do that a lot, we almost couldn't finish a sentence without English, some words just sound "uncool" in Chinese lol (it’s always about being cool in HK lol), but we don't really say “pardon” unless we are speaking English

Sup-sup-sup-sup-sup-super mobile (snap snap) It’s my hobby to take pics and collect them (I guess) Not gonna lie, everyone’s got a mobile phone, penetration rate (highest in the world) Yeah! If you’re going sightseeing then Nathan Road! (Fuu~!)

TAKING PICS WITH SMARTPHONE: Aph HK loves taking (embarrassing) photos (of China lol), but in real life HKers do love taking pictures, or videos too (it's dangerous if you misbehave, people would film you and post on Youtube or Facebook)

MOBILE PHONE PENETRATION RATE: I couldn't find data for HK, but I think I heard on average, each HKer carries at least 2 cellphones! So this could be true!

NATHAN ROAD: It's the longest street in HK and there's so many things, good food, good shopping places and yup sightseeing! (A lot of our streets are named after the Governors during the colonial time, this street is named after Sir Matthew Nathan for example)

Welcome this makes me kinda happy (Check it out!) Learned this from England - tea in the afternoon (high tea) Welcome, this is kinda fun (Shake it up!) Yum cha, Hong Kong milk tea, cha-cha Nice culture (frivolous)!

AFTERNOON TEA: Yes, it's still a tradition for us to have tea time, we call it 3:15, workplaces would have tea breaks, restaurants do tea time menu during 2-5pm, it's really cool and cheap! We usually drink HK milk tea (evolved from British milk tea) during tea time and there are so many delicious snacks like French toast, pineapple bun and of course egg tart!

YUM CHA: It literally means “drink tea”, but Chinese tea this time. It's a tradition for us to go Yum Cha every Sunday with our family! Dim sum is part of Yum Cha! We just eat and catch up with each others for HOURS!

Oh. My. God. “LOHAS LOHAS” Oh. My. Mind. “Gonna take a pic~” Take away “Is this delivery service for real?” Like, seriously, even if it’s way out of the way, no problem man

LOHAS: I didn't know what this refers to for a long time, I finally found the answer. This refers to LOHAS park, an eco-friendly residential area newly built few years ago. But what's so special about it? Is it famous in Japan?!

DELIVERY SERVICE: Well delivery service in Asia are generally good anyway, but I guess we are good and fast?! (but I think Korea too!)

Super Feeling unlucky? If it’s getting to you, go villain hitting at Ngo Keng Kiu A medium will perform an exorcism, and hit a paper doll with a shoe For fortune telling, go draw fortune sticks, or get a divine answer by throwing moon blocks at the temples… at Wong Tai Sin, light the fire of your incense! If you’re feeling tired, maybe you can give Feng Shui a try or something? A spiritual site in Lantau Island The Wisdom Path…is super Awesome for meditation, but there aren’t any toilets, so watch out Gold fish, bring me luck! (In money!)

NGO KENG KIU: Generally HKers are not THAT superstitious, but the culture still lives within us. I have never known anyone who did the villain hitting, but it's still quite a thing (and a great tourist spot). It's mainly for people who backstab you (we call them "small people" siu yan), but I guess evil spirit too.

WONG TAI SIN: Again, it's more for older generation who are still a bit superstitious. People like to go to Wong Tai Sin Temple during Lunar New Year to wish for luck in the new year. It's still quite popular!

See I told you we have natural landscape (source)

WISDOM PATH: I've never been there lol. Apparently it's a "path lined with 38 wooden monuments inscribed with the Heart Sutra prayer". In general, HK has a lot of nice hiking trail, our landscape is actually amazing, it's just we focus too much on making money...

P-Pe-Pe-Pearl of the Orient is me! (I guess?) Got completely wasted? Ended up in a dress (totes sick) Not gonna lie, population density is highest in the world in Ap Lei Chau Yeah! If you’re going sightseeing then Hong Kong Island! (Yeah~!!)

PEARL OF THE ORIENT: It's the nickname of HK, the Philippines is Pearl of the Orient SEAS

(Ending up in a dress refers to this comic, thanks parallel France!)

POPULATION DENSITY: Yea, that's what we are famous for really, small place lots of people (HK is a very hilly city, surprise, surprise), we have the most expensive estate price in the world 🤦‍♀️, not sure if Ap Lei Chau is particularly population-densed, but the whole HK is like that!

Good luck in everything this makes me kinda happy (Check it out!) Learned this from England - how to be a gentleman (ladies first) I wish you good health, this is kinda fun (Shake it up!) Typhoon, Kung Fu, WA-TAHH Supplements, Chinese herbal medicine (healthy~!)

LUCK: The newer generations are less superstitious now, but luck is still kind of important for us? It's more like a tradition than a belief, we do them just in case (like Feng Shui).

TYPHOON: As a coastal city, we get typhoons a lot in summer, but they are not as strong in comparison to the Philippines or Indonesia.

KUNG FU: We are known for our Kung Fu films, as the actors are all trained martial artists! Bruce Lee (WA-TAH was his catchphrase), Jackie Chan and Donnie Yen are great examples! Because of the wars and Cultural Revolution, many people fled China to HK, resulting the influx of high quality martial artists (eg. Ip Man).

HERBAL MEDICINE: As western as we are, we still believe in Chinese Medicine, but more in a preventative way.

Oh. My. God. “Air conditioning in full blast!” Oh. My. Mind. “That’s not eco-friendly…” Oh well “The air will become cleaner, I think?” Seriously a Mistake, but, no problem man

STRONG AIR-CONDITIONING: This line had me laugh die (Imao in Cantonese)! It's so accurate! You can catch a cold from the airconditioning in HK! And that's why we always carry a jacket even in summer! It's not very eco-friendly and our government is trying resolve that.

AIR POLLUTION: Yes we have smog (smoke + fog), it is becoming quite the problem really. The root of the problem is that Shenzhen, the city next to HK, is developing rapidly and a lot of factories moved there, so the smoke is blown towards HK (we don't really have many factories left, it's too expensive here).

Awesome Riding on a roofless bus, cruising through the neon streets If you want to, like, go shopping… at Ladies Market There are stalls with cute stuff, souvenirs (lots and lots of them) Talk the price down! Haggling is what really counts For some more miscellaneous and deep junk, more for the adult and thrilling The street where mystery thickens… Temple Street Would you like to try some cheap eats at the street stalls? Absolutely delicious! Asian food is the best!

NEON LIGHTS: You've all seen the stereotypical HK streets full of neon lights, but it's actually decreasing, because there's no newcomers to the industry (the lights are handmade).

LADIES MARKET: You can find so many stuff there indeed, for a cheap price! Branded stuff, fake stuff (we don't make them but yea you can find a lot of them), food and goldfish. Yes, there's a goldfish street. Why? I dunno, for luck I guess?!

TEMPLE STREET: Similar to ladies market, it's also great for shopping. This street is also known for (illegal) prostitution and triad, but it's still safe to visit, never in my life have I encountered any of them.

“Yoooooo, Mister, so I kinda sang this song, but seriously, rapping is surprisingly, like, tough?” “It’s also a shame that no one can see what I’m wearing, I’ve got serious swag, y'know.” “Phew… I kinda want to go home already… I mean, the peach buns are gonna be sold out.” “…can we go now?” “…can’t we go yet?” “Haah…” “Okay fine, like, whatever.”

One, two, three!*

PEACH BUN: They are actually eaten on birthdays, for longevity (that's what peach represents in Chinese culture).

*this line was spoken in Mandarin in the song, which would be the only critism I'd give. Yes a lot of people may understand Mandarin, but Cantonese and English are preferred and they are our official languages. One, two, three in Cantonese would be "yaat, yi, sam".

Oh. My. God. “The rent is really expensive…” Oh. My. Mind. “It’s not easy…” Why oh why? “It’s like, the highest in the world” We have serious inflation, but, whatever

EXPENSIVE RENT: We are the most expensive in the world, thanks to the high population density (and foreign buyers 😶), it's really not easy to afford a flat in HK, that’s why most HKers live with their parents until they get married (it’s also a cultural thing).

INFLATION: Stuff are still relatively cheap, but they are getting more expensive really quickly, mainly because of the rent of the shops.

Super they’re so adorable it hurts, the perfect balance of black and white pandas that bring you happiness… we sell them, sort of So fluffy and cute, such big round eyes The kinda? Make you Happy! Uh-huh

PANDAS: We actually only have 2 pandas here like everyone else, in Ocean Park (it's like an amusement park and zoo). They finally successfully mated recently, probably because of Corona shutdown lol!

There are over 100 of them, Tin Hau Temple, so super Before I head there, I seriously wanna eat… mango pudding! So many gods, like, one in every street Pay homage at the temple, light the fire of your incense!

TEMPLES: We still have the temples built before the colonial time! Hopefully, we are able to keep them too...

MANGO PUDDING: It's so good yes! Our dessert culture is just the best seriously! We have so many restaurants just for desserts! They are great places to hang out with friends after work or school!

The air conditioning at its max, the fire burning strong A steaming hot pot made with a carefully chosen soup base If you want to detox, have a Chinese herbal hot pot Absolutely delicious! Asian food is the best! Riding on a roofless bus, cruising through the neon streets If you want to, like, go shopping… at Ladies Market There are stalls with cute stuff, souvenirs, lots and lots of them Talk the price down! Haggling is what really counts Absolutely delicious! Asian food is the best! Every minute Happy☆Nice Town (Guy)

HOT POT: We love it! We basically love when a lot of people sit together, talking, sharing food (like Yum Cha), it's the harmony and atmosphere that we like so much! And yes, there are a lot of different soup base you can choose from!

BARGAINING: Yes do it, especially if you're in places like Ladies' Market and you're a foreigner, they do price things up if you don't look like a local.

***

Shout out to Takagi Motoki, the voice actor of HK, his voice fits the character perfectly! (and please get a new va for the new season please funimation) And how can he speak so fast?!

[verobatto]

You did something stupid, again

Destiel Meta. Supernatural Meta. 15x13. Spoiler. Visual Narrative Meta

Hello my friends! Did you watch the episode?

Okay, I must say i feel a little disappointed bc AUDean didn't flirt with our Cas and we didn't get a jealous Dean, but ... We will always have fanfictionland, I know many of you will fix it by writing what should happen there... 😏

Okay I want to say thank you to @agusvedder for her wonderful gifs in this meta!

Now, my quarantined friends, let's start this short meta...

Call back to Ruby/Sam, one of the first Destiel mirrors from season 5

It was hilarious when Cas pointed at Ruby as the demon Sam had been sexually intimate.

Why Cas is recalling this? Is important because while Sam was sexually intimating with Ruby, Dean was sexually tensioning with Cas 🤣🤣🤣 omg, is quarantine, sorry...

But it works, right? They were both mirrors, so...

Then we had Castiel talking face to face to Ruby, and Ruby remembered Sam, she said she liked him! Was him one of her regrets?

Just like the Empty scanned Castiel's head when he was there, discovering his feelings, Ruby confessed that to him.

Old Married Couple

And I'm guessing because this was a BL episode, we had a lot of Wincest, but we also had old married couple sit com with Destiel.

The exchange of bad jokes coming from Dean and Castiel being all grumpy, is our jam.

But we also had a recall to doing stupid things, only this time, it wasn't stupid.

Castiel almost dying to get into the Empty, is a parallel to Dean almost dying to get into the veil. And idk why it was so easy... But, could work as a foreshadow too.

Why a foreshadow? Because they showed us how, through Jack, Cas, or anyone else?, Could break into the Empty, and maybe... Because Ruby called Cas, he could represent the connection, the first one in waking up the Empty, and being released from it. So maybe, this could be the way to refill Heaven with angels sleeping in the void.

But is also a clue for my spec of Dean rescuing Cas from the Empty too.

The way Dean nonchalantly asked for Cas' grace under his scolding eyes, is a sign that maybe he was still a little mad at him for doing the almost dead plan. Because they are married. And they're two dummies in love. That's why.

Far to be Happy

We talked extensively about what meant for Castiel to be happy. He always will put the excuse AUMICHAEL IS STILL OUT THERE, or now, CHUCK IS STILL OUT THERE. But... What is the show telling us about his truly happiness?

In this episode we had people dressed in colors that can give us clues about that.

I told you that everytime we see pink colors means happiness. Now... Look at Jack T-shirt...

Is white (light blue and white means purity and divinity) so divinity with pink and blue. He was wearing Castiel's happiness. Jack is pivotal for Castiel to reach happiness. And the white color representing divinity, is maybe talking about his destiny, to become the new God, as I pointed so many times in my meta specs.

Now, let's jump to Jo.

Jo was wearing a pink coat with a red bluse and black T-shirt with lines in blue and red.

Okay... Pink is happiness... So... Red is our toxic, and angry Dean, black is the Empty and lines in blue and red are Cas and Dean again. This has so much sense, because Dean is Castiel's happiness too, but the Empty is there separating them. And I suppose Dean is in angry when he discovers the deal with the Empty, or when he will see is really too late.

Now, let's come back to Jack's wardrobe at the end... Light brown coat (so Cas, isn't?) And orange t-shirt. Orange is the mix of Red (Dean) and Yellow (Sam) so each time I see orange I recall the brothers... And is so cute he is wearing this colors, because is his family. They are his three dads.

Miscellaneous:

There were a lot of point that caught my attention, but because this is the Destiel Meta, I will put just two here. And a third we were discussing bwith my friend @weirddorkylittlediana

Dadstiel talking with Jack about the way Dean manage anger, and mourning, because he knows. He knows Dean very well. So he can talk about that with his son. And we, Destiel shippers, can scream like the fangirls we are.

Why no one were helping Sam to block that door?? And Dean and Castiel spotted side by side? Okay, I could scream again my spec here about Dean and Castiel in the Empty, and Sam helping them to open the rift and keep it open through a spell and Jack, but... It is also a clue to think about Destiel endgame as vessel sharing. Just saying.

Diana told me: look the church scene looks like a wedding, I noticed the colors (bisexual flag) but I didn't noticed they were spotted as if they were getting married, I will use her pics to show her idea...

Okay... Hilarious, thank you Diana!

To Conclude

I didn't like the Wincest subtext in this episode, but we'll, I think you can't give to all the sections of this fandom happiness at the same time, right?

There was a lot of old married couple but like sit com.

The reference to the Empty and how Cas can get in and get out and maybe, bring some dead demons and angels, it could be a foreshadow to what the Heaven Restoration will be.

I hope you like this meta, see you in the next one!

Tagging @metafest @gneisscastiel @emblue-sparks @magnificent-winged-beast @agusvedder @weirddorkylittlediana @michyribeiro @whyjm @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @dea-stiel @mybonsai1976 @anarchiana @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @destielshipper221b @mishtho @dancingtuesdaymorning @feathered-castiel @bre95611 @zoerayne2426 @justmeand-myinsight @that-one-fandom-chick @proccastinate @studio-hatter @pepevons @liwos-rabithole @poorreputation @mrsaquaman187 @dizzypinwheel @jawnlockwinchester @breathing-oxymoron @a-bit-of-influence @dwstiel @thislunarkiss @ladygon @shippsblog @la-random-fangirl @lets-try-this-again-please @mychemicalobsession514 @destiel-shipper-11

If you want to added or removed from this list just let me know.

Buenos Aires March 23th 2020 5:58 PM

[thepinkseat-askthemoonbunny]

"Infiltrate Thingol's palace, they said. It should be easy for someone of your caliber, they said. Bloody....this is the last time I do business with those tree-fucking Noldorin wankers."

It's all fun and games until the High Prince of the Noldor hires you to steal his shinies back and it starts fucking glowing despite being wrapped in a million layers of cloth. Now you've got a literal beacon in your pocket and it's time to make like nachos and dip.

My girl Gwilwileth, gem thief extraordinaire and all-around capitalist/businesswoman taking on her toughest job yet. If it weren't for the cash she wouldn't be doing this shit but hey, Nana needs the money. (From a Silm alternate-timeline, AU fic I'll probably finish. One day. Maybe.)

Wikihow pic I used as a pose reference here: https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/8/89/Sneak-Out-of-Your-Second-Story-Window-Step-9-Version-2.jpg/v4-460px-Sneak-Out-of-Your-Second-Story-Window-Step-9-Version-2.jpg.webp

Random facts about Gwil under the cut:

A Sinda born in Doriath to parents who were hunters/tanners, they weren't super rich but their life was happy and they had it pretty good.

Would help her mom tan the hides for leather and butcher her father's kills, and would sometimes accompany him on hunting trips when she got old enough

Grew up without seeing the light of the Trees, and is HELLA resentful of the Valar for a very long time for not only providing them with the dimmest possible light source (starlight isn't very effective) but "sitting on their glittery divine asses while Morgoth rampaged my continent and did fuck-all until some bloke with a shiny on his forehead had to come and beg them personally."

Is also resentful of the "light elves" for looking down on the "dark elves" just because they never saw the Trees. Shit man, not like it's our fault!

Her father died in a hunting accident and so she and her mother tried to keep the business afloat for a while, but eventually it fell and they fell into some pretty dire straits tbh.

She's just a big ball of resentment and I love her so much tbh.

Turned to stealing jewels both because she wanted to stick it to the so-called High Elves and because she and her mom are flat broke and she's sick of it. (Her mom thinks she found work as a lady's maid in the capital)

Uses the skills learned while hunting in her exploits, and has only been caught like three times.

She doesn't hate ALL the light elves, just the ones who think they're better than everybody (which lbr, is like a huge chunk of them)

Gwilwileth is an alias and not her real name, her real name (father-name) is Mithruien (it means "grey huntress" in Sindarin)

Has the nickname Lamoril, or "black tongue" because she swears a lot.

She just really, really loves her mom, okay? And goes through great pains to keep her actual occupation from her.

Greatest ambition was to go to Valinor and steal some of the light of the Trees to bring back to Middle-earth (until they got destroyed and shit)

Sinda PRIDE

Let's just say that either Feanor has a teensy bit more self control in this AU or there's a do-over, either one is cool.

Either way he still wants to kick Morgoth's ass for killing his dad and stealing his life's work (understandable).

But this time around, instead of killing a shit ton of innocent people to get his gems back, he hires a professional thief (Gwil) to steal them back while he does war preparations to go fuck up Morgoth.

Sends one of his sons with her to prevent any deception cuz he's still kinda paranoid (but also smart, like there's no honor among thieves)

Took the job cuz she was offered a fat payday (she and her nana would've been set for life)

The rest is still unwritten

[aeosedo]

A guide to Tech Witchcraft

Hello lovelies this has been something in which has been requested or talked about among my students on discord, so i wanted to make a guide covering all the information and decided to share it to the public of fellow witches , this is a brief introduction on tech witchcraft an the direction it is going now! 

Technology and Witchcraft: A Guide to Techno Witchcraft

Introduction 

With the day of age we now live, we go to a point where we are experiencing so much progression in the ways things are done, in our day to day life. Witchcraft is no expectation to this rule as witchcraft is constantly formatting and changing everyday through new age magic, While there is still much work to be done, There are some wonderful formulas in which you can use to boost your work through the power of electricity. 

On top of the concepts of technology witches I will also be going over apps in which I enjoy and use, in which can help you with your witchy needs How does it work? Well, To start off I think we need to go back and look at what exactly magic is in the first place. Typically magic explains the manipulation and manifestation of energy through oneself and one's mind. It can be used to content with the conscious and subconscious mind. 

It is idealistically all witchcraft leads to a goal typically under these things , however are also not limited to: 1) self improvement

2) to connect to the divine 

3) to keep or follow a pre existing or new traditions/ lifestyle 

4) Healing 

5) Banishing 

Now keeping this in mind , the tools of magic we use work because they are stored with intent and energy.  All items are charged with energy from one self or divine energy as well. Any items we chose to work with will have energy and intent. Money does not really matter in the situation as long as you can get creative. 

However this in mind there are correspondences with the elements In western culture the elements include: Air, Fire, Earth, Water and Spirit 

In Eastern Culture the elements include : Wood, Iron, Fire, Earth and Water

Correspondence plays about 40 percent of the magic in the situation as long as something matches with an element or deity , and you can put energy and intent in it, it could potentially work. 

We can see the light used in smartphones, computer screens, and so on and so forward the element of fire. In the early days of Greece when we looked at the elements:  Light, Fire, Soul and Temperature were all considered things of fire, if something was warm ( such as the human body) it would be associated with fire. 

For example: 

Typically this is how one of the concepts of medicine started with human temperature, if a person was too hot , they needed water and earth to balance it out ( water and food) so using it in this retrospect works with the light being warm and as well as bright like a torch or flashlight.  Often when a phone uses a lot of energy or a computer when gaming it also gets warm due to all the energy in which is needed. 

Now in terms of Eastern Retrospect, the Metal element represents human advancements and Technology, the original concept was the “ Age of Iron” which was a time of building, machines etc. The Metal element shows the progression in humanity and the ability to create and go. In the Chinese Zodiac this is often empathized with the concept of the Metal Element being referred to as the “ Gold” element.  Gold was typically something used in royal buildings and statues as well as Jade. In terms of eastern retrospect 

Gods of the Technological World 

Now, you may be thinking what kind of god would be willing to work with you through a screen? How is it possible to talk to a deity through screens?

There are gods in which are gods of human communication. Typically they are gods who are associated very closely with the throat chakra. The throat chakra represents the ability to communicate and as you know there are a million and one ways to communicate , one way humanity communications with clothes is through technology. If you're one of the first people reading this you may be reading this through a computer screen!  

It is also worth mentioning even if you do not practice reiki, plenty of elements in western lore and gods focus on the energy of communication and 

It is amazing to think about how men and woman have made it possible for this to happen.

Who are the gods of communication? 

Mercury 

(Mercury is a god in which I work with who represents Communication. The first time he talked to me was through a you tube video pop up in fact! , is was quite a experience )

Hermes 

This is Mercury's Greek counterpart. Hermes is the god of: Communication, Medicine Transportation, Advancements and Commerce. 

Papa Legba 

He is a Caribbean God in Haitian Vodou  which represents Communication Speech, and understanding 

Al-Kutbay

A Nabataean god of Wisdom, Communication and Writing 

Saraswati

The  Hindu goddess  of knowledge speech and creativity 

 Benzaiten (Benten)

The Japanese god who is the Counterpart of Saraswati, She represents the way the universe flows, water, advancements in society such as : Music  , words, speech,knowledge etc 

Nabu

A Babylonian god of wisdom and writing

Nidaba

 A Sumerian goddess of communication writing, progression and learning 

This is just to name a few of the major ones from different cultures.  There are many many more  They are all typically connected in some way with the throat chakra and throat energy systems that focus on communication  and advancements that humans make on earth

With that being said technology has become a part of our day to day lives, one of our main forms of communication and such. Many gods adapt and change as we do, they are the ones who help steer the wheel in the way we go with technology and also more than enough use the energy in which cellphones and computers  naturally generate to work with and manipulate if they need be. 

The more and more we spend with items , our energy naturally ends up on the item, due to this we can fill items, apps etc with intent to help you manifest your energy and help you become the best you , now we can get into the question im sure you may have “how? “ 

First I will be going over some methods in which a closeted witch can use in replacement of items in which they may not be allowed to have at home due to the nervousness of being caught 

Altars: 

Pic Collage

Animals Crossing Towns and Houses 

Playlist via Spottily, sound cloud or you tube 

Draw Sigils Using IBS Paint / Procreate 

ORAS Pokemon Secret Bases 

A good way to manifest energy with pic collage and picture based altars are making them your wallpaper ! , and just spending time there meditating with your device and setting intention. 

The Pros and Cons 

Pros

With being able to draw , and spend personal time and energy allowed for more customization than store bought items, you are putting together the item from scratch which is beneficial. I find video games and such are easier to get your energy over and even  gives you more room for items : ex: getting actual gold bars in real life is thousands of dollars, for one offering to Pluto, however in animal crossing this becomes a reality. 

Cons

It can be harder to get your energy on the items  if you are new to energy manifestation as well as conducting energy, you are also not able to touch your items, or use them in more direct spells: ex: pouring candle wax on items is impossible , being able to carve sigils in your items is also impossible as well as of right now.  However despite this there is in a way more customization, and not everyone uses their altar as a workspace, rather just a place of worship. 

While not all gods are gods of communication, gods can still talk through technology however it could be difficult for them if there are not the right correspondences made in order to make communication. 

Now there is an app coming soon called build an altar, and it could be a nice doorway for more customization  but for now we do not have that option!  the future looks bright however ! 

Even if you have a main altar at home, having a digital altar can be helpful on the go, if you're traveling and with friends or family! 

Grimoires / Book of Shadows 

There are few cons when looking at making a digital grimoire, if anything it can be a saving grace if your handwriting is awful or you prefer to do digital art.  You can easily transport your digital grimoire  on any device and you can also prevent page loss and also it is easier to edit. Some Apps for Grimoires Include : 

Google Docs

Word Press 

Notes App

Pro-create 

Lunar Diary

Tumblr ( you can make private / public books to share) 

Twitter ( you can also make private blogs as well 

You can also put them on a USB when you're done to carry it around and share  , and even divide information like it  pro-tip: Draw Small Sigils with Sharpies for protection / binding spells 

Cons

One thing to consider on this method is  this method: some people feel as if using ink is better for sealing and writing spells as well, and it is more personal with adding energy/ easier to put in energy to your grimoire as well as making binding spells to protect your grimoire, however it all comes down to personal taste nor is it impossible to make a binding spell for your grimoire either. 

Witch Apps 

Even if technology is not your thing here are some helpful apps in which can help you with your journey 

( TOOLS) 

Labyrinthos

This is an app in which you can use for learning tarot, it does an extraordinary  job with correspondence meetings and has small quizzes and is set up like a small academy in which to help you 

Golden Thread Tarot

Golden thread Tarot Deck is a Tarot App in which you can do your daily tarot and do tarot readings and also has spreads and such you can use too. Golden Thread Tarot also sells their own decks which are pricey however extremely beautiful and worth the money if you want a physical deck

Seventh Sphere 

A app by Tina Gong focusing on Lenormand Tarot Divination 

Since Lenormand is a newer form of tarot, and harder form of tarot, it has some meanings in which you could read the cards/ base your interpretations about. 

Co-star 

While this app does not have all the information in a natal chart  it is good to get a general look on your chart when looking at all of your planetary placings and have your chart on the go. There is also horoscopes and you can add and compare charts with your friends 

My Moon Phases 

This is a app used to track moon phases based on your location and shows percentages very good for using it if you want to know what types of moon magic you can use and how to celebrate and manifest accordingly 

Wicca Calendar 

This is a app in which has all the wiccan holidays together in a wheel along with dates and  count out timer to keep the hype of the next holiday coming up 

Stone 

This is an App that helps you identify gemstones and rocks along with their properties and in information about them  

Plant-Net 

This is a app to help you identify plants just by taking a picture of them, and then it takes you directly to their Wikipedia page 

Head Space 

An app for guided meditations and allows you to keep track of your practices with logs and goals. It helps you manifest your energy with professionals hypnotherapists and helps teach lessons on how to meditate and mindfulness. While there is a paid membership it is most certainly worth it for those who love meditation 

 Calm

This is another guided meditation app in which i enjoy, it is cheaper and has more free features , it has nice calming music as well and is made to help rewind and relax 

Down Dog 

A free app for yoga with all different types of yoga in which can help heal and restore 

Spell Work 

Disclaimer 

The biggest issue with being unable to do these is the manifestation of energy, it can take a longer period of time than in real life, until you figure out how to manifest through energy work through technology  some things can not be touched the same way, but i truly believe the soul has no bounds. Gods have made this possible by adapting over millions of years 

Virdi Keep a online garden and water and care for your plants 

Candle Apps 

Some candle apps let you make color correspondences as well 

IBS Paint 

Draw sigils, runes and alchemy symbols and keep them in folders or use them for your grimoire 

Mighty Timer / Timer Time your teas to let them cool down/ Steep! 

Breathing exercises for meditation

Here you can also find more on you tube as well! , One of my favorite hypnotherapist is Micheal Sealy 

Another hypnotherapist i have tend to love recently is Liza and her work can be found here

Hypnosis and meditation are steps in the right direction for shadow work and becoming your higher self  using guided meditations rather free or paid for can show a lot of progress and can be used to heal!

Pins Help manifest your goals by putting them collectively together in a vision board you can also use these for altars and such, making them your wallpaper or printing them out can help you manifest your greenery.  consider meditating in front of your vision boards while working with intent for good results  

There are so many more ways you can personalize your craft and be a tech witch, This is a wonderful place to start though and i hope you were able to take away from it 

Thank you for checking out my guide and I hope it can teach you something ! :D

[praphit]

“Black Is King” - nuff said, but I’ll ramble anyway.

"Black is King" is of course Beyonce's new joint, based somewhat on "The Lion King", with an array of African cultures and symbolism at its core. 

Now, I am no different than the rest of you. I am obligated to love all things Beyonce. I have an extra obligation as a black man; not that I don't love everything that she does. I don't want "The Hive" or the Illuminati after me. I'm just saying that even if I didn't care for something that she did or had a slight bit of criticism, I'd be obligated to love it anyway. But, like I said... I love everything that she does anyway, so... we'll just go ahead and give this musical film a Grade: A+ Ok? cool.

Beyonce did everything in this film. Normally, when someone tells me that they wrote, starred in, directed, produced, idk filmed... catered, was the whole I.T. team, etc, I think to myself "This is either going to be awesome or a huge pile of apeshit." But, we all know that The Queen overflows with awesome sauce. I mean look at all of the adulation from the critics.

But, this is an artsy project, so some of you might not understand what's going on. You don't want to be disrespectful, and shine light on your ignorance, so allow me to help you understand some of it, by taking you through it, so you can pay your proper respects.

The film starts off with a baby in the river. I don't know if it's some type of Moses thing going on (who once was a baby floating down a river), but Beyonce ends up with the baby. I don't know if it's Beyonce's child or not. I suppose that Beyonce could have stolen this child. But, you know... it’s Bey. If Beyonce ever kidnaps your child, consider yourself blessed.

And so, The Queen starts singing to the kid as she walks around some gorgeous island.

I'm thinking that this is just a typical morning for Beyonce. While we're all at work on a Monday morning hoping that the next sip of coffee will get our minds ready for another week, Beyonce will be walking on some dream island, singing and dancing, as her servants prep her royal breakfast.

Oh, and there's some blue guy who keeps appearing as well. I'm still not really sure what's going on with him.

THEN, all of a sudden, we're in space. 

Beyonce is there too (kinda in spirit form and glowing), and some old black man talks to us about destiny.

THEN, we're back on earth with some sort of star (possibly) falling quickly from the sky. Superman maybe? Satan (you bible nerds will get that)? Beyonce? Some sort of “Beyonce is God's gift from Heaven” imagery there? Idk. All of a sudden, I didn't care, because... hips.

Lots of hips start shaking in front of us.

I’d show you a pic or gif, but I’m afraid that some of you don’t know not to stare into Beyonce and her dancers hips - it’s like the ark of the covenant, if you don’t take breaks.

But, let me tell you... MY GOD.

A true goddess! As I think more about it, her godly powers throughout this visual album/film were spot-on dance choreography and unlimited stimulating outfits.

And of course... eternal hips.

Like all stories, we at some point must get to the villain. I guess you could follow along and say that Beyonce's possibly stolen child grew up a bit, left home, and found his way to some dude who looked like young Bobby Brown. 

Imagine Bobby Brown wearing an awkward amount of gold chains and holding a yellow snake.

Some of you probably don't remember the "king of R&B". Well, it's debatable whether he was or not; he certainly believed that he was, but I wonder who would call themselves the king or queen of R&B today? 

There's this guy, who is self-proclaimed... 

I affectionately refer to him as “J-Squeezy”. 

I think that I was half asleep when I first tried to pronounce his name, and that's what came out. He'll always be "J-Squeezy" to me.

Maybe Jhene Aiko (one of my wives). 

Though some might say Justin Bieber. Can you imagine all of the R&B legends look up from bended knee, and are forced to give high praise to their “king” 

- The Biebs? 

That's just plain sad.

So, Bobby Brown, some sexy woman in a red dress, a yellow snake, and a monkey scratching its butt all tempted Beyonce's probably stolen child. Now, the kid... idk what happened to him... he's a drug dealer or something now. ... idk.

BOOM! And like that, Jessie Reyez (whom I love!) is on the scene.

Her and a dancing motorcycle gang are in the woods doing God knows what, until some dude, who thinks he's a lion ends the scene (Scar from "The Lion King"? Idk).

We are then transported to a funeral. Everything is white. Beyonce is there, and in all white. But, things take an artsy, dark turn, and now it looks like Beyonce is dead. BUT, Jay-Z finally shows up to the rescue. I don't know where he has been; probably hanging out with his new buddy.

All of a sudden, we're back to their house/mansion on the island and Jay-Z is picking Beyonce up to go to some club. Then, they enter the club in slow motion. Which again, I feel like they probably do that sort of thing all of the time. Jay and Bey just walking in slo-mo to make an entrance.

It's a wild party with synchronized swimmers (yep), human chess pieces (yep), and Jay and Bey eating soul food. 

Just another night.

Jay-Z must have went to bed early or something, because immediately Beyonce is transported to some other club in the inner city. There are a lot of sexy dudes around. Idk if maybe Jay and Bey have got some sort of Will and Jada sitch going on.

Oh, and these designs at this No-Jay-Z’s-Allowed-Club were dope... weird, but dope! Unfortunately, I couldn’t find pics of them online, but they kinda gave me a “Silent Hill” vibe - 

Pretty much the same :) (Illuminati)

But, the scenes of this "flick" never stay dark, they always go back to vibrant colors with the African cultures vibe. All of a sudden, the colors are back and the kids (lots of kids out of nowhere... possibly ALL stolen) are with Beyonce, and they're all playing patty cake.

Wait, was "patty cake" appropriated from Africa? Dammit, white people.

Then, things got a lil confusing (THEN:) with what appeared to be random stories of random peoples lives. It was as if cameras were set-up at random events such as weddings, parties, etc. Is Beyonce "big brother"? When I "people watch", I'm just at a park or looking out of my window. Apparently, when Beyonce "people watches", she spies on us all.

Someone quoted something about "Remember who you are." Something else about how “We're all kings (except for Beyonce's servants)”, and you need to go get what is yours... or something. And someone else said "Child of dust return to the river" I think we all know what that means.

Annnnd more blue guy. 

I’m starting think that the blue guy was just in Bey’s head the whole time. 

At one point, there was a bunch of blue guys, and they were all dancing.

I could go on, but that's enough; it's just more of that.

I will say this - I loved the fashion, the locations, the dances, and the music... WOW! I love everything culturally about "Black Is King", as well as the overall statement (artistically) that its making..

However... now, I'm not saying that I’M saying this, but some might say that throughout this 1hr and 25min long medley of music videos that they found themselves saying often "What the hell am I watching?" I repeat, I AM NOT SAYING THAT. Perhaps some just might not get it. Perhaps, not unlike this year (2020), there's no real meaning. Now, it could be divine retribution. Maybe all of the worlds doctors and scientists are conspiring against us (and themselves). Or maybe the world wasn't well prepared for this pandemic. Maybe the arrogance in SOME parts of the world

 are making their sitch worse, and MAYBE there's no meaning to give it. Maybe we simply need to start finally listening to one another and quit being assholes. Maybe 2020 is a year merely to be suffered through, and hopefully you'll make it to the end. Not that "Black is King" is something to be suffered through. I gave it an A+ remember? And I certainly, definitely, unequivocally finished it. I'm just... rambling like I do.

Do you remember any of the imagery from the movie "The Ring" - allow me to refresh you memory:

(Adele? How did you get in there?)

You know, just a lot of confusing shit (though I love that movie btw).

I'm reminded of this, because the images in this movie had no dialogue to them; we all had to join the main character in figuring it all out.

Now, picture that, but instead of the creepy girl, we're blessed with Beyonce, and it's in color... and smear Africa on it. BOOM! That's art! Who wouldn't want 1hr and 25mins of that??!

All hail The Queen.

[tenpointstoq]

Geraskier mansion future Au ideas pic references

So I want to write a scene that could be in my long fic, but I got the idea today of a crazy Fae mansion party that is just like the scenes from the 90’s Romeo and Juliet film. So here are some ideas.

A space created by fae, by succubi, it was an assault to the senses for a normal being, to Geralt it was like standing too close to a lit flare. So bright, the smells, sounds, it all washed over him and tried to engulf the Witcher.

Neon dripped down the walkway, people in masks, elaborate gowns that showed more than they concealed, every race, every sexuality, was present, drawn down the corridor that glittered as if it were paved with diamonds. Nothing would surprise Geralt at this point.

The space was more than dreams and nightmares. It was hallways that had no conceivable end, a space created to lose oneself in for as long as you dared or as many chose, until they became one with the mansion itself. What could make Geralt go to such a place? Coin? The wish to vanquish something bigger than anything he had ever experienced before? No, instead it was on the arm of the man he loved. The man who had been invited to this house of sin and sensuality, who, like a moth to a flame, seemed to flutter beside him, Geralt could hear his heart as it skipped the odd beat. From the moment they had stepped onto the property Jaskier has begun to change. He smelled sweeter, Geralt watched him like his cherry red lips, adjusted his jacket and revel in the feeling of leather against mostly bare skin. A magnificent feather boa, crafted from many magical creatures, wrapped around his throat, torturous in its languid softness, never quite enough.

The gardens were a bright Smokey wonderland, boats drifted across the water filled with patrons laughing, multicoloured smokes lingered across the surface, absorbing the party goers as they drifted within them. Geralt blinked and felt the colours collide as one, his head spinning as they stepped into the entryway, losing his grasp on Jaskier for a moment as the bard skipped over to kiss the cheek of the hosts. Old friend of his, a mix of races Geralt may or may not have killed in the past.

Each room drowns him deeper, Geralt loses track, there are entire hours where Jaskier is at his side, in his lap in dark spaces, those fucking feathers drawing across his too sensitive skin, shirt open somehow, lips slick and pressed to the divine siren in his arms. It felt like a fever dream, Jaskier was too bright, too real, so sweet he wanted to devour him whole. And then just as quickly he was alone, watching the way neon light ripped across an empty pool, caught in a strange room, plants and neon clinging to the walls, a pool flush against the wall, the sounds of other forms of divine chaos echoing from in front and behind. What was this place? The way the colours jarred from the glimmering tiles on the floor, this place of the in between seemingly untouched and yet, how could it be? Others must have wandered through. After time he could not count he found himself in the next room, scrambling to recall where he had just been, why neon green and the sound of water lapping brought him such a sense of dread.

There are forests indoors, some akin to the awe inspiring spaces of Victorian era’s, all glass and wild beauty. Too warm as orchids bloomed, tiny creature that looked like petals scuttling across their lips, onto the stalk and leaves. He could feel so much life, though beneath it the ever lingering presence of decay brought acid to the back of his throat. The sweet smell of fruit too ripe to eat crosses his tongue as a human and some kind of Fae tore past him, bare foot and laughing, the blooms of a cherry blossom had begun to fall, gentle pink raining around them all. In stark contrast there were crackling dead forest spaces, that tasted of ember and scorched earth. Geralt pushed his way through, trying to follow Jaskiers voice, a little too light, too gleeful in such a dark place. Was it his mind playing tricks on him? When has he truly last seen Jaskier? Was Jaskier here at all?

Corridors with carpet so thick it sunk beneath his feet, muffling the sound as he walked, mirrors in the ceiling capturing the controurting gore that spread across the walls, moving crimson and deep burgundy, dripping what seemed like blood; though as Jaskier slid his finger through the liquid, pressing its taste to Geralt’s tongue with his own the flavour of Pomegranate bloomed in his mind. Perhaps this was hell and here he was, Hades, delivering his sweet Persephone to her lifetimes of darkness.

Jaskier lay on a table, draped in silks, hundreds of candles across its surface, along the floor, warm wax slid down his naked chest, his skin gleaming gold in the flicking light. Flowers surrounded him and he looked truly holy, his eyes half lidded. As he reached for Geralt he felt the soft flutter of a feather grazing his cheek, they were cascading from the sky, for the roof was so high it was pure darkness, it was impossible to tell if there was a ceiling at all. The feathers inked into Jaskiers skin seemed to flutter, to join their sisters in the air around them. The ink lining the rest of his arms began to pool under the skin, twisting around their entwined fingers, snaking their way along Geralt’s arm. Jaskier looked so insanely beautiful stretched out like that, the surreal nature of it all, the way the ink stung his skin, he tried to push it away, to lean down and embrace his lover.

And as their lips brushed together he was gone once more, Geralt’s hands empty and yet, they glittered, standing out in the sudden darkness, as if the very stars in the sky had fallen and claimed their new home in the palms of his hands. Geralt lifted them, moving them through the air, marveling as their light, so bright, so magnificent, ate but the darkness, each memory of before burying itself in the deepest part of his mind.

So just some ideas. Do you like where it’s going?

[duskdragonxiii]

hello! im really interested in judgement and purity! i saw this cool art where they were sky noodles and looked similar but with different colors, but on other art they seem to look different? do they have different forms? what do both of them look like when they're not sky noodles? and can you tell me a bit about their lore? its so interesting and I'd love to learn more about them!!

Of course!! I believe the art you are referring to are the world without end parallel pics that i did. That would be Judgement and Purity in their eternity forms. Which is really just how they looked in the beginning when they were one in the same. At the dawn of the heavens they were split into the two we know. Though back then Purity would have looked something like this

At the split Judgement was not awakened. It remained dormant inside the power of Metatron until a force to rival the divinity was necessary. Judgements form us far simpler to that of purity bc most of it is hidden beneath feathers of light. But the two in their current forms are of course like this (forgive my quick doodles)

If Judgement was to fall as Purity did it would lose all its light and look pretty damn different. As for other forms they DO have humanoid forms but theres reasons I can’t show that to you yet ;3 We’ll learn more about Judgement and Purity and their importance later in BTE

[witchqueenofthemoon]

BODY AND SOUL Part 27 (Duncan Shepherd/Mackenzie Stone Millory AU)

BODY AND SOUL MASTERPOST

Author’s Note: I always knew the cabin stuff was gonna be pretty long; this is ostensibly Part 1 of 3 that involve the cabin and the narrative surrounding it, a major part of my fic. Please refer to this in particular, which was a major influence on the mythology I’ve built around this particular place--especially the black oak circle--and its connection with Duckenzie’s destiny. I’m so excited for all of you who have reached this part of their journey with them; while I’m using these chapters as an excuse to write LOTS of sex and doting for them (which I fucking live for), they’re also really important to the arc of the wider narrative I’ve been weaving from the beginning; the crux of what pulled this fic out of the relatively small story I had originally planned into something huge and cosmically beautiful--a project that has changed my life, a project I will finish, or die in the attempt thereof. The cabin’s kitchen looks like this. Duncan’s herb grinder is this one, for y’all stoners like me who care about shit like that. Sweet alyssum looks like this (here’s some in pink and white). The mental picture of Duncan with those little flowers in his hair is such a beautiful one to me. A reminder that Kenzie’s bikini looks like this, the rust-colored slip dress looks like this. In order to really understand a major aspect of my story, I feel it’s important to read a little about the concept of the Divine Feminine, a major tenant of witchcraft--I’m a solitary practitioner, and though my Kenzie is not overtly Pagan, she is Pagan-minded regarding how she conducts her life; coming to understand her powers will bring her closer to owning her witch identity for real. The Divine Feminine in my story is certainly not limited to Kenzie, either, and it’s very important that everyone who cares about Duckenzie understands that; Duncan learning to nurture, understand and respect his own feminine divinity, within and outside of his relationship with Kenzie, is a huge aspect of this story. Kenzie kneeling in the flowers was definitely inspired by these shots of Mallory in APOCALYPSE. The spiral of the flowers is not coincidental--the spiral is a very old symbol, symbolizing the cyclical nature of the universe and everything in it, so keep that in mind. If you haven’t noticed, roses are an important part of the imagery of my story--the working title for this fic was DARK RED ROSES once upon a time for like half a second, and Duncan calls her the Queen of Roses in his thoughts because they will forever be associated with her in his mind--it was that rosy balcony where he first saw her, and like the clearing surrounded by black oaks, the balcony was a Thin Place. I’ve been working hard on 28, so that delayed me editing this part--the good news is I’ll probably be done with 28 by the end of the day tomorrow. Here are some super cute pics I found of Billie where she really looks like Kenzie. As ever, your likes, reblogs, comments, asks and edits mean the world to me.

Duncan’s mouth was open on the fiercely soft skin above Kenzie’s breasts, drifting against the Tiffany moon, his hands urgently searching for the tie that held her sun-colored top over them, his mind adrift in her with an overwhelming strength that was making him gasp--the bed was so silken-soft, the light so sweet and golden in the daylight, and the energy in the room seemed suddenly hazy with the weight of their thoughts; Kenzie’s were rapid, heightened, pressing him with mutual relief, kindling up a desire in him that inflamed.

“Oh my fucking goddess, baby--fucking fuck me.”

Queen of Roses. Not just the Princess. The Queen. The highest and most beautiful. The height of all my desires and every pleasure of my heart.

“Oh, I fucking will, Miss Stone,” he spoke into her skin, against her neck, into her ear. “I heard you, baby. We have nowhere to be. This is the only place in the world, and there’s only you and me, and I’m gonna make you fucking scream, I’m gonna make you feel so fucking good, Kenzie, moonbeam--” Kenzie writhed under his touch, a nervous, ecstatic laugh drifting out of her.

He found the tie at her waist as his mouth fell onto hers again--oh thank Fate, fuck--his fingers demandingly pulling it apart, drawing the soft fabric away from her, eager beyond all feeling to touch her. Since this morning, her little mouth so adoring around him, his senses for her had been urging him on to a desirous undoing for her--Mackenzie. Kenzie. Baby. My fucking baby. As wonderful as it is to taste you, as exquisite as it is to have your mouth on me, beloved, it’s fucking you, fucking you as we gasp against each other that brings us closest, so irrevocably close, kindles that feeling in me of not knowing where I start when I’m inside you, not feeling the divide of our bodies anymore, never wanting to come away, feeling truly as though wherever we were once separated, we’re tied together again, whole. So before we do anything else today, I’m going to fuck you. Right now. Fuck me, beloved, and let’s get lost in each other, my Persephone, my Ariadne bathed in stars, my Titania of the flowering forest.

Kenzie was lifting up as he gripped her in the space under her shoulder blades, her eyes heavy-lidded as she listened to his thoughts; he easily held her slight weight, keeping his grasp wildly tender. She pushed the top from her arms, and Duncan was lowering her back to the bed (oh fuck it’s so fucking soft, I could lay here with you all day, for days and days), her golden hair scattering around her in a wide halo, his fingers clutched tight around the roundness of her breasts now--he’d slipped them under the softness of her little black bikini top, and Kenzie’s slender chest was heaving, her breathing labored with the immediacy of his touch as he kneaded his palms into her supple skin. He could feel the tiny fluttering vibration of her heart under his thumbs, and it was making his cock jump against the front of the jersey shorts, urging him to make her moan. Speak, angel. Tell me of your need in this sacred space that exists only for us right now.

Kenzie’s little fingers (so delicate, so sweet and small, I love your hands, Kenzie baby) were drifting up to his open collar, undoing the buttons below with gentle speed, their smoothness sending a burst of shivering warmth down his spine, into the space between his legs where his cock was beginning to strain as he knelt over her, his body dipped down on her. Her mouth was so wet and tasted so sweet, her little tongue quivering against his, the tiny longing sounds she made under his lips, and he fought the faintness she was causing; it was gathering like wild, stray flowers, into a bloom in his mind. Fuck, I want you so much, I feel like I’m going to actually pass out, baby.

“I could just die,” she was whispering. “The way I can feel you right now, the way you touch me, baby, the sweetness of your thoughts, how beautiful you are--Duncan, baby, how you kiss me--”

“Remember that first night, Kenzie,” he was murmuring into her mouth, his fingers drifting down the jut of her hip bones, into the denim shorts, down the prickly slightness of the shorn hair around the lips of her sex, letting his fingers hover there. “Remember when you first let me kiss you, angel of heaven? Your little velvet dress, the crystal at your throat, those shoes that left red welts on your beautiful little ankles--remember how you told me you’d come home with me? God, I thought I was going to die right then.” Duncan was drifting the hand up from her sex now--I’m gonna tease you a little, angel baby. We have all the time in the world. I’m gonna make you so fucking wet. Drifting it to the button of her shorts, pulling the zipper down with an ease that brought a wet glow into her jade-hazel eyes, her little mouth open as she listened to him speak, releasing tiny gasps, her thoughts swirling and chaotic with want for him. The soft black of the bikini bottoms peeked from where he’d opened the zipper, and Duncan brought the flat of one palm against the mound of her there, the softness between her legs, using his other hand to pull slowly at the shorts. Kenzie wiggled a little from where he held her down, and the shorts eased off her thighs after a moment. She kicked her Vans off and they tumbled to the floor--then Duncan was dipping back to yank the shorts away, discarding them to the floor as well, kicking his own shoes off, lost in admiration of her body in the bikini. Kenzie’s little hands had managed to undo every button of his shirt now, and he ripped it away, impatiently, mouth still shivering into hers--then he lifted up, pressing his hand harshly between her legs again, heart aching at the whimper that fell out of her, and then Duncan smiled.

“For you, Kenzie, I surrendered my soul in an instant. I may not have really understood that in the moment--but I do now. I would do anything for you.” And this he spoke into her jaw, lips drifting along its delicate curve. “Anything. You--an angel. In my bed, and now that bed is ours, and right now this one is too, isn’t it, baby? This is our bed.”

“Yes,” Kenzie whispered, and the pleading in her voice made him bite his lip, close his eyes, force his need back with an insistent hand.  “Yes, fuck, Duncan, yes, hmmmh,” and she was kneading against him, moving her hips so she pressed into his hand cupped around her, “Gimme your big cock in this beautiful bed, fuck me, Dunny baby--”

He moved his fingers down now, to the crook where her thighs began on either side of her cunt, and pressed outward, then up, so her knees were pressing into her belly, the underside of her thighs clutched in his tight grip, the lips of her visibly folding into the slight fabric covering her sex. Kenzie moaned again, her eyes closing at the demand of his movements; now I have you right where I want you, Princess Kenzie, and I’m gonna make you want my cock with terrible, aching need before I give it to you, before I fuck you hard. I know you want me to--I can feel the golden coil of your desire, telling me what you need.

“Who’s your Prince, baby?” Duncan dipped his hips down so his crotch rode up against hers, against the strain of her cunt still wrapped tightly in the dark fabric, lifted his body up so they were flush against each other there, the hardness of his erection pressing into the outline of her, then back down, causing an aching friction that sent sharp needles of want through him--he felt Kenzie shudder deeply, her thighs shivering violently under where his hands gripped them harshly, felt her cunt spasm along his length, and her head dipped up, her hands finding his jaw, flitting over the stubble on his cheeks, her little mouth open, beginning to abandon all sense of her composure.

“Uhmmm, you are, Dunny, only you, you’re my angel Prince--I want you to fuck me till I’m raw--”

“Not until you tell me whose baby you are. Tell me who you belong to, baby.”

“Unh, you. I belong to you.”

“Say it again.” He let go of her thighs now, pushing himself against her again, as harshly as he could, riding his cock against the fabric that contained them, his hands clutching her little wrists and forcing her arms up over her head, straining them against the silken strands of her golden hair fanning out around her head--like your halo. I will bring you sweetest ecstasy, my goddess, I will worship you most faithfully for all my life, I ache to be your most supplicant admirer, truly, you must know that I do, you must know that I would die for you, I would die and love to die if it was what you wanted--

“I belong to you, Duncan. I’m yours forever. Fucking please--” Her voice needled up into a piteous cry that made him feel as though his mind were about to come undone, unhinge from itself and float away into the ether of oblivion. His mouth tasted at her, cutting her words off, swallowing her cry, his fists pressing her wrists down into the impossibly soft bed, pressing so hard he worried for a moment that he’d leave bruises on her skin, but could feel her thought--leave them, I want bruises from you, beloved, I want to see your devotions on my skin--and the sweet softness of her mouth was promising him that she meant it, her tongue laving out along his bottom lip, her hips bucking up to press her cunt against the fabric that covered his straining cock. He let go of one of her wrists, keeping his fist around the other, his gold Cartier bracelet digging into her, the diamonds on hers leaving tiny welts on his arm--and forced the hand that was now free into the waistband of the black fabric at her sex, rough, demanding, running his thumb into her cunt, now soaking wet for him, bringing it back to her clit and pressing there, unrelenting. Kenzie keened up against him, and her breasts were pressing into the top of his chest for a moment and he shivered to feel her sweet warmth, to smell the sweetness that lingered around her face, and then he was letting go of her other wrist, knowing what she wanted to do--she slid the shorts from his hips so they pooled around his knees, and keeping his hand at her clit as though it were tethered there, he slid out of them; the remainder of their clothing was pushed over the bed so it fell to the floor, discarded.

They were in the very center of the huge bed now, and to Duncan it felt as if they were floating in the middle of some impossibly smooth cloud. He paused for just a moment, Kenzie’s lithe body spread out under him, the irresistible curve of her hips attracting the grip of his hands with a magnetic pull, her face aglow with iridescent arousal and happiness, her fingers dipping in a little fist under her chin, her eyes fixated on his face.

“Kenzie, sweetest, loveliest, beloved--” he dipped his mouth to her ear, unable to stop himself, wanting to give her the roughness he could feel she desired, but lost in his own rosy thoughts, his own deep need to worship her endlessly. “You are so beautiful it fucking staggers me.” She was giggling against the tickle of his breath, and Duncan was overwhelmed so utterly with his love for her he had to steady himself, had to slow his mind, drift away from it, for fear that he’d die right there, die of the immensity of it. Then, he slid his arms under her, against the terrible softness of the bed, and lifted her onto his lap, lifted her so for a moment her golden hair tossed against his cheeks, so her mouth was hovering above his, so her breasts were pressing into his chest, sliding against him with such a yielding ache, the back of her thighs pressing into the top of his, the hard length of his erection pressing between the lips of her, into her clit, and he moaned against her throat as she cried out near his ear, and then he was lifting her up and forcing her down onto his cock, clutching her under one breast and at her hip, holding her steady as he rode up into her, humming into her skin as she began to buck onto him, grinding down so he was buried in her, entirely.

Duncan’s thumb came down and pressed against her clit again, and he spoke into her ear.

“Remember when you rode me like this, that first night? Your hair and your necklace glittered in the low light, and your mouth was open, just as it is now--and I knew you would belong to me, from the way you gave yourself to me, oh Kenzie, I knew you were mine--” he was gasping now, gasping for breath, gasping to feel her, to see her with her head thrown back now, eyes to the ceiling, her mind a swirling maelstrom of gold, lost in his words, loving them utterly as he knew she was. Keep talking, baby, keep saying such beautiful things. Tell me everything and fuck me.

Duncan was pounding his hips up into her with so much force, his cock burying itself in her with such abandon, he worried he’d rend her in two, her breasts and arms shivering terribly against him, her eyes full of ecstatic, oblivious brightness. He paused for a moment, the entirety of him inside her, the wetness between her legs sliding down his thighs in dripping trails.

“I love you, I love your golden hair, your lips, your throat and your eyes--I worship you, unnnh, Kenzie, Mackenzie, you are the goddess of my heart, unggg, you are the most divine of all beings--” Duncan suddenly lifted her up so he slid out of her, and she gasped in surprise, and he was flipping her over forcefully, pushing her down on all fours on the vast silken bed, hand gripping the back of her neck downwards, her little palms coming out to hold herself up, and her ass slid up towards him. Duncan brought his fingers up to tangle into her hair, then gripped it harshly, pulling her head back--then he buried himself into her cunt, seeing the veins on his cock straining with hardness before he did, and now he was riding into her from behind with a wildness that bordered on a Bacchanalian trance--they were facing the painting of Cupid and Psyche now, and his mind prickled with the combined tenderness of it, his tenderness for her against the hedonistic lust he felt for her, inside her this way.

“Unnnng, fuck my little cunt, baby, fuck me--” Kenzie murmured, her fingers clutching the luxuriant gold-and-white spread, pressing her ass back to receive him, and he slid back so all of his length retreated from her, then he forced himself back inside her, entirely, so his balls smacked up into the lips of her vulva, and jerked her head back further so he could see her eyes rolling up into her head, the open drift of her mouth as she lost herself inside the feeling of him, feel the twist of her head under the forceful pull of his hand.

“God, I love your little cunt so much, I’m gonna fuck you so hard while we’re here, I’m gonna make your little cunt so fucking pink and sore, baby--” he was keening into her, burying himself in her, pressing his whole body against her; Duncan pressed her head down now into the bed so her cheek dipped to the side, her little breaths gasping against the silken sheet, and he lifted her hips higher so he could see the raw, rosy darkness that was spreading through the space between her legs, the color of his attentions, see the redness at the pucker of her ass where he knew he’d fucked her so well last night, fucked her so hard, pressed his come inside her with the plug afterwards and kept his need inside her. “We’re gonna fuck so much you won’t be able to walk, baby, we’re gonna fuck so hard you won’t be able to move--”

“Uhhhghh, Dunny--” He could feel how close she was hovering to her orgasm, and he immediately stopped, now, stopped and pulled out of her, though he still pressed her neck into the bed, holding her steady, and Kenzie dissolved into a shivering moan of frustrated need that set his heart on fire--”Mhhhhh, Dunny, please--please--mmph, put it back, gimme your cock, spank me--”

“That’s it, angel, I knew that’s what you wanted, I felt it--tell me again. Say it again, baby.”

“Spank me. Fucking spank me.”

“Yes, Princess Kenzie.”

Keeping the hand steady at her neck, holding her rigidly prostrate, Duncan brought his open palm down, immediate and harsh, on Kenzie’s right ass cheek. The snap reverberated across the wide room, and Kenzie let out a little scream that rang in his ears, making him smile immediately, making his cock smack against the space between her legs, straining. He watched her cunt spasm, felt her shudder under his hand.

“Mmmphhyes,” Kenzie cried, and then, demandingly, “do it again, again, right now, do it again.”

Duncan smacked her left cheek now, first with the palm of his hand, then the flat of it, as hard as he could--Kenzie keened forwards from the force of it, a gasp rattling out of her, the sound of her choking on the spittle that had been sucked back into her throat. “Uhhhhhyes,” she moaned. “Again.”

Duncan could see the rising red welts he had caused--already he knew he’d left a mark that would linger on the left side, but he felt utterly beholden to her demand now, lost in his lust. Hearing his hidden hesitancy, Kenzie spoke again, her voice (the sweetest of all sounds to me) drifting up to him from where he pressed her. “Do it, Duncan. Leave marks. I want it, baby. I want you to leave your mark on me. Do as I say.”

Duncan felt his skin flush, felt himself quake under the power in her words, knew that as much as she wanted him to do it, his desire to give her the pleasure she demanded was even stronger--I would do fucking anything for you, Mackenzie Stone. I can’t speak of the things I would do in the face of my love for you. I am utterly yours for all time. There is nothing for me without you. Whatever you ask of me, know I would do it. No holy terror I would not face. No fearful, dreadful task I would not undertake. No darkness I wouldn’t swallow. I fear nothing if it is in your name.

So he brought his hand up once more, and then down with as much force as he could onto the right side of her ass again--Kenzie keened forward once more, gasping out a cry that was stifled in her surprise, and she sucked air in sharply as he smacked her again on the left, and then he buried his cock into her cunt again, unable to stand the coolness of the bare air against him anymore, unable to bear the sight of her dripping sex, convulsing and empty, and he pulled her head up from the sheet and flushed her against him, his arms trapping her little body as he knelt into her, mouth at her jaw, fingers rubbing harshly at her swollen clit--her hands gripped up around his arms, her faced turned up to Cupid and Psyche there, and he heard her whisper “that’s us, baby, that’s us, fucking divine,” and she was coming now, her tiny shape shivering with such intense force in his grip, her voice screaming out so utterly that he immediately felt his own release, suddenly, unexpectedly, coaxed out of him with her impossible sweetness, her utter abandon, and she was turning her head as they came together, their open-mouthed kiss the melding of their souls, their minds melding together, high in some other, more ethereal place for that moment, in the place where they had wings imperceptible to human eyes, where they had eyes made of galaxies, hair of sunlight, clothing woven in impossible geometry. It’s you who are divine, Mackenzie Stone. I’m merely blessed to be in your light. Her golden softness against him in the daylight was, for a moment, so like a dream, he wondered if they’d fallen into an impossibly vivid fantasy, a place that was untethered from all reality.

But no--you’re no dream, my love. You are the realest, the truest, most irrefutable of all things.

------

For a little while they had laid quietly, clutching each other, still lost in the center of the golden-cream bed, its smoothness still kindling his senses to a strange high; Duncan pressed soft, imploring kisses along her cheeks, at her eyelids, the bridge of her nose. For a little while Kenzie seemed to drift in a wordless oblivion of post-coitus, her eyes fluttering, her throat spasming with tiny movements as she swallowed, her arms shivering almost imperceptibly under his hands as her mouth dipped open, her hands drifting at his jaw, falling back and forth over the stubble. I love this, he could hear her thinking, over and over in an endless circling. I love this, I love the feeling of you here, I love the soft-prickly touch of you, I love you, I love the curve of your jaw here, I love you, I love touching you here, love you…

His hands fell down to her ass, feeling there tenderly--he coul sense the wincing shiver in her as he did, and ached to know she felt pain he had caused, even if she had asked for it--”ugh, Kenzie, are you okay?” He dipped his head up to look at the marks he’d left--he could see the dark red outline of his palms on both cheeks, and knew there were would be bruises on her tomorrow.

“Baby, it’s okay. I loved it. I wanted it. It--it fucking feels so good. I like it when you’re rough like that with me. I asked you to do it, okay? It was perfect.” And she was pulling his face down to her mouth and kissing him and sending long waves of reassuring, lovely gold into him, where they cascaded down from the top of his head into his body, and Duncan was staggered again by the power he knew she had inside her. I’m blessed to be near you at all. I can’t even fathom it.

Kenzie leaned back from him, eyes gazing at him insistently. “Baby, go get some of that weed, okay? I wanna smoke a little. Then we’ll bring the picnic basket down to the lake.”

“Ugh, yes, baby. Yes.” Duncan slid out of her arms, finding his underwear and the jersey shorts where he’d thrown them to the floor, pulling them on, glancing over to her in the middle of the bed as he did; her hair was still fanning out around her, her expression quiet and deeply content, her little mouth dipping open, her eyes falling up and down over his form. He leaned back over her, dipping his head down over her hip, pressing his lips into her left ass cheek where the redness was swelling, hand coming under it to cup it softly. She moaned softly, hand falling in his hair--then he leaned away and went to the open doorway, glancing into her face over his shoulder. “I’ll be right back, baby, wait till you try this stuff, it’s so good, the high is so gradual and steady, it practically feels like an edible.”

Kenzie smiled at him, dreamily, and Duncan had to turn away, feeling lost, consumed for a moment inside his longing for her, her golden hair, the roundness of her breasts, the space between her legs. No matter how much I’m with you, no matter how often we fuck, it never feels like enough. I want you again. And again. And again.

Duncan was drifting inside these thoughts, distracted deep within them, when he realized with a shock that he was outside; the warmth of the afternoon was on his skin, the gentle wind off the lake drifting into his curls and and down his naked torso--wait, how did I get outside so quickly? Did I really walk through the house and down the stairs and out the door without noticing?

Wait.

Duncan tried to backtrack to the bedroom for a moment; tried to rewind the last few moments, retrace his steps. But he couldn’t visualize walking through the house--he couldn’t feel the wood under his feet or see the shape of the chandelier on the landing, couldn’t feel himself descending the stairs. Oh, fuck. I think I did it again, he thought. I think I moved again--without moving. He went to the G-Class, parked quietly on the gravel. Duncan stepped gingerly over it with bare feet, noticing his legs were shaking a little--he opened the trunk and pulled his Prada suitcase towards him, unzipping it and pulling his Armani sandals out, slipping them onto his feet, then set about the work of moving the other Yeti cooler and the picnic basket inside, as well as both suitcases and Kenzie’s tote bag with the books, the fireside cooking kit, and the picnic blanket and piles of lovely quilts Kenzie had ordered. Once everything was inside the house, Duncan brought both of the coolers into the rustically-styled kitchen; it had long windows overlooking the woods on the eastern side of the house, and an island in the middle made of a long slab of oak, rustic tree trunks fitted closely together to make up the base, and latticed stools with oak legs, cool-silver appliances mixed in with the wood embellishments of the counter tops. Duncan hauled both coolers onto the island tabletop, then the picnic basket beside it. The Yetis should keep everything cold for another hour or so, he knew. We’ll pack the picnic basket for the lake in a little while. For now, I need to test this theory again.

He noticed his hands were stinging a little still; stinging from his harsh slaps against Kenzie’s skin. He brought his thumbs against his palm, drifting his fingers over it, down his wrist to the gold bracelet, twisting it around absently. It wasn’t as though he’d never touched anyone else in a harsh sexual way; there were many lost nights with random partners where he remembered flashes of wanton lust, remembered his nights with Evan where he was always the dominant. But Kenzie, he thought. The idea of hurting her in any way is nightmarish to me. I understand that it gives her pleasure, but I can’t help but feel unnerved. Inside this love, I always feel untethered, absolutely unhinged with attachment towards her, and helplessly shy; helpless to behold her. To love someone this much in a world so uncertain is terrifying, and even moreso to love someone as beautiful--inside and outwardly--as she is. And to feel passion from inside it is so intense, it’s as if I’m constantly on fire. Whatever she asks for, I would die to give it to her. I know this. Utterly. It frightens me, and yet I feel so unafraid when we’re together. How strange and wondrous this love is. And it feels as though--these things happening to us are only happening because of this love. I don’t know why, or what it means. But I do feel like our love has opened some kind of door. A pathway, maybe, is a better word. The path is becoming more clear every day. The path to our destinies. And our destinies are irrevocably intertwined. Our destiny is to be together no matter what--to be together inside this greater thing that’s coming.

Duncan went back to the front doorway, where he’d left their suitcases. He gripped the handle of each in either hand. Okay. Let’s try this again. Duncan tried to visualize the bedroom, closing his eyes; the golden-creamy coverlet, the soft gauzey curtains, the gold laurels, Cupid and Psyche on the wall--and Kenzie, her hair fanning out around her like beams of sunlight, her serene expression with her eyes lifted up to him under the halo of her eyelashes, her little mouth smiling, her white breasts and dark rosy nipples, her little hands clutched along her ribs, and her wonderful, beautiful hips and thighs, the gorgeous curve of them, pressed together, hiding her sex in their dip. Mackenzie Louise. Angel of my heart. Light of my shadow.

“Duncan, fuck.”

Duncan opened his eyes--oh, shit. It worked. He was back in the bedroom, the weight of the suitcase handles still in his fingers; Kenzie had opened the window while he was away, and wind drifted cooly against the curtains. Kenzie had put her bikini back on, and she had been laying on her belly on the coverlet, her feet lifted up behind her, knees crooked, chin against her hand; she’d been facing the Swynnerton painting, no doubt gazing at it with the same sort of serene expression she usually reserved for The Youth of Bacchus; but her eyes were on him now, full of astonished confusion, her head crooked back in alarm.

Kenzie sat up, shaking her head in amazement, crossing her legs.

“You just did it twice, baby. I thought maybe the first time I imagined it, I was still coming down from my orgasm and thought I was just sort of fucked up--but that time I saw it. You popped back in here like Samantha in Bewitched. Wow, baby.”

“Kenz, see if you can do it again. See if you can move something--wait.” Duncan crouched and laid his suitcase flat, unzipping it and taking out his gold weed pipe. He laid it flat on his palm and held it up to her, looking into her eyes--they were glowing with flecks of gold, her excitement rising behind them.

“Okay. Try now. See if you can move it.”

Kenzie’s eyes squinted for a moment, biting her lip with concentration; Duncan felt the adoration of his love wash over him, watching her in her little black bikini, her tawny hair gathered over shoulder now, her hand reaching out towards him, her palm upwards, fingers curled just a little. Then Duncan glanced down at his hand--the pipe was gone from it. His eyes shot back up to Kenzie, who was grinning at him in triumph, the pipe now grasped between her thumb and index finger. “Ah ha!” she laughed, tossing her hair. “I did it again!”

“Baby, do you feel--” Duncan was going into his suitcase again, pulling out the bag of weed, a black herb grinder, and a black BIC lighter, sliding up onto the bed with her, kissing her, “--do you feel like whatever this stuff is, these things we can do--fuck it, this magic, is stronger here? That whatever it is is more potent out here? I feel like my body is charged with an electrical current, I feel like my nerves are singing--”

“Yes. Yes. That time it took almost nothing from me--it was as easy as breathing. I just thought about it for a second, and it came to me. I don’t feel dizzy or out of breath like I did before. I think I could do something a lot larger and it wouldn’t bother me at all. That’s how it feels.”

Duncan was grinding some of the blue-strain out and packing the bowl of the pipe, and his nerves still had that potent, shimmering edge--he felt high already since reappearing in the bedroom, high on the strange power of the impossible thing he had done, and the things Kenzie could do, the mystery of them.

“I was thinking, you know that feeling we were talking about--you said it seemed like we opened a door when we met, and I think the door was more like a pathway, like we opened a path, and now we’re on the path, and it’s one we only could have found after we found each other. And now we’re on it. It’s the right path. And the powers--fuck, Kenzie, the magic--they’re part of that path.” He held the bowl out to her and she took it, gently brushing his fingers, staring up at him. My sweet sweet Kenzie. To be alone with you this way. I can’t find words.

“I think so too, Duncan. I think we found the path. Oh, baby. It’s so beautiful, isn’t it?”

He could see the hint of tears glistening around her eyes, then she lowered her gaze to light the bowl and breathed in, deeply, letting out a little cough at the first embers in her throat--she dipped down to his mouth, lifting her lips onto his, hand cradling his cheek, then blew the smoke between them, into him, down into his throat, into his lungs, the weed at once inebriating and potent, settling into both of them in the span of moments, bringing a new glow to the room, a spiritous opalescence. Together we’ve manifested real magick, she thought, and he heard her, warm inside her mind and in the grip of the weed, reaching out for her hand, pulling his long fingers achingly down her skin. She passed the pipe to him, which was still lit, and he breathed in from it, deeply. Together we have brought something to life. With this love we’ve woken up something very old and very powerful. I feel it, Duncan. I know it.

“It’s--so, so beautiful,” he replied. “Beyond anything I ever imagined was possible before I found you. You are so beautiful, Kenzie. It’s like I can see the universe inside you.”

“When I write my book, I’m going to steal all the lovely things you say to me,” Kenzie smiled. “I’’m going to pretend like I came up with them.”

“They’re all for you anyway; they belong to you. Everything is for you--every part of me.” Duncan set the pipe down on the softness of the bed, hand drifting down her smooth thigh to her knee. To give myself to you, to give you my love--there is nothing that has ever made me so happy in all the world, Mackenzie Stone.

“I know, baby. I know. I love you. All of me is for you, too.”

“To hear that, my heart just--fucking sings, Kenz. To be loved by you is just…” Duncan trailed off, looking away from her, full of the feeling of shyness again. To be inside her gaze shook him to the center of his soul. It’s like looking into the window of time, seeing that there is something beyond that, something so radiantly lovely, it defies all description. The thing beyond time is love. And I see that now. Because I feel it.

Kenzie was dipping her face down to him as she had before, pressing her mouth up against his--the taste of her bitter with the weed, sweet with the scent of her perfume and her hair and her skin, then she leaned away and gripped his hands, pulling him off the bed with her. He stood over her little frame, marveling over the crown of her head only reaching to the top of his chest, longing to pull her against him, but she was dipping down to her suitcase now, pulling out one of the dresses she’d packed, a strappy rust-colored mini dress, pulling it over her head, sitting abruptly on the rug around the bed (it was covered in gold fleur de lis) to slip her Vans back onto her little feet.

“The lake, baby, the lake,” she said over her shoulder, disappearing into the bathroom, emerging  moment later with two fluffy white towels which she pressed into his arms. “I wanna see the lake, come on.��

Kenzie twined her fingers around his, and in the haze of her touch and the weed and the magic he knew was with them (I know it, I know it is, I’ve seen it, I feel it) now, Duncan knew he was right. We are on the path now. “Take me, baby. I’m yours.”

--------

Together they’d put away all the groceries they’d brought in the woodsy kitchen; Duncan couldn’t stop himself from continually pressing kisses into her hair and along her forehead as Kenzie lined the fruits and vegetables and the carton of eggs, the jars of olives and tiny pickles carefully on the empty shelves; opening the drawers, her hair dipping into her eyes, to slide the lunch-meats and turkey bacon into them. He packed the picnic basket with honeycrisp apples, the tortilla chips and pico, two ripe avocados, and made them each a turkey sandwich on the sprouted bread with fresh lettuce, the artisan provolone and slices of a ripe tomato; then he slipped two bottles of the wine inside, one red, one white, and lined the others carefully at the bottom of the fridge and the reds on the kitchen’s island. Kenzie was watching him with that glittering affection in her eyes, the one that always stopped his heart, made him shy--who was I before I met you? He wondered. I feel like my life has finally begun. Finally, I’m awake, and everything before you was a dream. The weed had made him feel deeply contented, and he could feel a similar dreamlike state of solicitude from her.

“There’s so much I want to show you here,” he said, gripping the handles of the basket. He was still shirtless, and only in the jersey shorts and sandals--fuck it, Duncan, he told himself. There’s no one to care. “Just wait until you see the sky tonight, baby. And I think I can find that clearing again, the one I told you about before--where I went alone that night. With the goldenrods and orchids. Though they might not be blooming now, I don’t know.”

Kenzie was anxiously pulling him out the sliding door to the side of the kitchen; through it was a small side-deck, and then a stony path that led around the house to the path next to the gazebo and the swing that hung from the oak tree--then even further down to the lake, its surface dappled with glitter in the afternoon sun, and the dockside, the canoe bobbing from it on a length of rope. Kenzie stopped them for a moment to admire the gazebo, then glanced over at the swing, her expression elated; I love all of this so much, he heard her, and pulled her against him for a moment, burying his nose into her hair, breathing in. I love you so much.

She pulled back from him, her eyes gold-flecked, then she smiled, mischievous--Kenzie turned and sprinted away from him down the path, her hair streaming out behind her, the little dress fluttering up to flash the dip of her ass in the black bikini. Kenzie made it to the dock, the Vans slapping noisily on the wood, and paused to slip them off and pull the dress over her head, discarding it in a heap--as Duncan came up behind her she ran back a few paces on the dock, then scurried off the edge, cannon-balling into the water, splashing him with a jet of cold spray. He grinned, setting the picnic basket down, shaking the droplets of water from his hair. After a moment, Kenzie reappeared, blinking water from her eyes, pushing her wet hair out of her face, bobbing to the surface. He could see the minute kicking of her feet under the water as she leaned back, face tilting up to the wildly blue sky, the tiny wisps of cloud scudding over the sun, which had moved from the center overhead to begin its slow descent into mid-afternoon.

“I think heaven looks like this,” she said, her eyes drifting closed as she floated there, the surface of the water’s clear reflection making it seem as though she bobbed in the sky itself. In the distance there were hills that stretched for miles due west, and Duncan knew the sun would set over them that evening--he thought of Karer See, with its pink and purple hills--knew after that the sky would burst into a brilliant cascade of stars, the likes of which were never visible in the city, the likes of which weren’t visible anywhere but here, really, as far as he had ever seen--I can’t wait to gaze at the universe with you, he thought, crouching to sit along the side of the dock, dipping his legs down into the water, bringing out the bottle of red wine and opening it as he watched her, the blue weed floating up and down through him, flaring in his mind and his blood like flowers blooming.

“Heaven looks like you, Miss Stone.”

She squinted at him, sticking her tongue out, dipping down to swim over to him, reaching up to where he held a wine glass down to her, his other hand falling against her wet hair. Kenzie sipped at it, then set it gently on the dock, dipping down into the water so her mouth was hidden under it. She kept her nose hovering just above the surface, her eyes sparkling with a green-blue reflection from the sky, dancing at him. He felt a jerk at his foot as she playfully yanked on it under the water.

“Hey! A little fish grabbed me!”

Kenzie laughed at that, ecstatic. She yanked again, and Duncan had to grab onto the side of the dock to keep from being pulled into the water this time.

“Cut that out, Mrs. Shepherd.”

“Mrs. Shepherd,” Kenzie balked, laughing. “That’s your mother.”

“But it’ll be you, too. Soon. Mackenzie Louise Shepherd, Chairwoman of the Board of Directors, Shepherd Unlimited LLC.”

“Oh, soon, huh? What makes you so sure I’ll say yes to you, Mr. Shepherd?”

“I know you will. You told me you will.”

“What if I change my mind,” she said, teasingly, reaching for her wine glass again.

“You won’t.”

“Oh really?”

“You love me.”

Kenzie grinned. “Nah, I just love your big dick and your credit cards.”

Duncan shook his head, and the weed crashed against him again, this time in a stronger wave. He stared at her; he felt bold, untethered by reason, and intoxicated with her.

“Nope. You’re totally in love with me. You’d do anything for me. I heard you tell Annette. You gave yourself away. You’re going to marry me.”

Kenzie’s smile fell away; oh god, what was it? What did I say? he thought. But then he saw the emotion in her eyes, saw that it had been there all along, that her facetiousness had been a paltry attempt to hide it. The weed seemed to be clashing against her thoughts in him, muddling them; but now he felt them in a surge. I did, didn’t I? I did tell her. I forgot about that--so much has happened since then. And I meant every word. I would do anything for you. I am going to marry you. And I love you so much it fucking hurts like a wound. It’s like the most bittersweet chocolate, a wine so rich it burns on the tongue, this heady weed we smoked, drifting in our veins now. My love for you is like that inside me all the time--and your love for me, so strong it’s like a storm that surrounds me, sweetest rain against me.

“Kenzie, baby. Come here. Eat something.”

The heat had deepened; it had to be in the 80’s now, Duncan guessed, remembering his phone was off and discarded in one of the pockets of his suitcase now, and he breathed a sigh of relief as Kenzie set her wine glass down again on the edge of the dock, reaching for his hand. He pulled her easily up to him, into his lap--cradling his head into her neck for a moment, not caring when her wetness seeped into him. Then Kenzie extracted herself from his arms, leaning over the basket to use a cloth napkin to dry the lake water from her hands, grabbing one of the towels to wrap around her shoulders, then reaching for one of the turkey sandwiches Duncan had made for them--he’d wrapped them in cloth napkins too, tying each with a neat double-knot, and Kenzie sat beside him, crossing her legs, wincing a little, to untie it.

“My ass is sore from double-duty,” and then she snorted; they both burst into a peal of laughter. Kenzie reached into the basket and handed him the other wrapped sandwich, their laughter bleeding out into stoned giggles--and together they sat on the dock, eating with insistence. Duncan was starving; sex and weed will do that, he thought, and Kenzie was nodding, reaching for tortilla chips from the basket’s interior, her little teeth crunching into them, her eyes drifting up to the sky again, full of lovely wonder that pierced his heart. Duncan finished his sandwich and cut one of the avocados in half, using a spoon to dip its green flesh into his mouth, watching her coyly. Her wet hair was dripping onto the dock’s wood surface, leaving a damp ring around her, and he fought the urge to reach out and grasp her little breast in the tiny bikini top. He watched it shiver with moisture; watched the dip of her clavicle, the moon still glittering at her throat. She brought a hand up to brush her wet hair from her cheek again, the diamonds on her wrist flashing.

“I just wanna buy you more diamonds,” he murmured between bites. “Hundreds more. One for every star in the sky.”

“Just get me flowers, baby. I love the flowers best.”

“We’re taking the path through the woods behind the house after this, I’ll show you where most of the wildflowers grow--we can gather as many as you want to bring back with us.”

“Oh, Dunny, I’d really love that. I wanna cover the whole wall at home with them.”

“A wall of flowers for Persephone, trapped in the Underworld.”

“Duncan. No. It’s not the Underworld. It won’t be--not anymore. Not after what we do.”

Duncan hesitated; my heart is so light with you. I believe it. He remembered her tear-stained face last night, the pulsing glow of her sadness when he found her in the powder room, the memory of Bill Shepherd’s cruel resentment in her eyes.

“I’m so sorry about my uncle, Kenzie. I’m so sorry I wasn’t there. I’m so sorry that he doesn’t understand--I’m sorry he touched you, that he said those things. It won’t happen again.”

“Duncan. It’s not your fault.” Her hand grasped his much larger one, disappearing into it. “Death is frightening. People are afraid to die. It’s makes them do things they wouldn’t do otherwise. He’s afraid. I already forgave him. I can’t possibly hold a grudge against a man who’s about to die.”

“And Annette?”

“Annette...I think when we get back, we’ll all feel different, you know? I think things will be different.”

“I hope so. I wish I could push all my resentment away. I want to--to try to forgive her.”

“You’re human, baby. You’re allowed to be upset, unsure. It’s okay.”

“Kenzie. How are you so wonderful. So perfect.”

Kenzie shook her head, scattering water across the dock, her eyes (the forest, the sun) burning at him. “I’m not perfect, Duncan. Fuck.”

“You are perfect. You’re perfect to me. For me.”

“You’re fucking perfect,okay? Your fucking stupid perfect hair. Your jawline--I dunno--it could cut steel or something. Your beautiful hands and your lips and your eyes like the sky. And the beautiful way you think about me. It takes my breath away.”

“Kenzie. You are the brightest person I’ve ever met. It’s like you’re made of sunlight. Of starlight. It shines out of every part of you. I could see you in the darkest place. You’d shine out like a beacon. The way people react to you...they can see it too. I think you...you have royal blood. I mean--you come from...something greater. Greater than me. Greater than anyone.”

“I don’t understand that. Why people react to me that way, especially lately. I thought maybe it’s just because of your family and, I dunno--you. Millions of Instagram followers.” Kenzie smirked at him.

Duncan shook his head.

“I think it has to do with us being together. They can see something--I don’t know what to call it. Something extraordinary. They don’t know what it is, but they can feel it. It has something to do with the magic, maybe. Like an invisible current of energy. Claire said something to me that night she came over, after you fell asleep--she said we’re intense, like a bright light a moth flies into. I think people see us like that, for whatever reason--especially you--like a bright light that they want a part of. Some people are like Lindy and Gabby, they’re sincere--it inspires them, they see how much we love each other, I think. And some people respond like that guy Georgio--lust. They just want a bite of it. And other people still--Marissa, or my uncle. They want to destroy it. Snuff it out. They long for it, and can’t accept that it doesn’t belong to them, and never could; that they can’t possess it.”

Kenzie was eating one of the apples now, munching on it with an earnest cuteness that made Duncan long for the bed upstairs again; I’m gonna throw you down in the flowers and kiss every inch of your skin soon, Mackenzie Stone.

“I think that’s why I want to be kind to them so much,” she said softly. “Lindy and Gabby, I mean. They’re so sincere.”

She paused, her mouth on the apple’s smooth skin, and he wanted to reach out and brush his fingers along her lips there. Eve eats the Apple of Knowledge in Eden. And then she Knows--she knows everything. I feel like we’re about to know, too. Everything.

Duncan nodded. “I know that, baby. You don’t have to explain that.”

“Claire has always been that way to me. So sincere. I feel love from her so genuinely, so selflessly. Now I think--I think Claire could always see it. The thing we are becoming.”

“I think so too. I think Samuel could see it too. And Pilar. And so many other people around us our whole lives. We’re noticing it now, but...I think it was always there.”

They both fell silent. Kenzie’s fingers tightened on his palm for a moment, drifted down to the bracelet, sliding over it softly. The thread. The tether. It was always there too, wasn’t it? The one between us. The magic was always there, and so were we. Us. Together.

Then she dipped her head down and took another ravenous bite from the apple, crunching it happily, her face falling into an expression of blissful happiness, the sun in her hair. She slid her hand out of his, balancing the apple on her knee, and twisted her hair out onto the deck. Water pattered in an arc that glittered in a beam of light, reflecting off the water and her diamond bracelet, blinding him for a moment. Scatter your gold over me. Then she reached for the little dress she’d discarded in a heap, pulled it over her head, and stood up, reeling her arm back and tossing the apple’s core into the water.  Duncan drifted his fingers up her leg, looking into her eyes.

“Show me the woods, fair Oberon.”

The day was growing muggy now, the heat at its zenith--Duncan knew after this time, this halo’d span of hours, the sun would begin to set and the day would cool into an evening that would linger in both of them for the rest of their lives; whatever we see and feel tonight, Kenzie, will always be with us. His skin felt hot, potent, the weed crashing up again in his mind, like a rising tide. He could feel the sweat at his temples, at the back of his neck, feel the ghost of her hand that had just left his. Kenzie’s hair had already begun to dry, its waves tossing over her shoulder as she slipped her Vans back on and skipped away from him down the dock, beckoning to him impatiently.

“Come on, Dunny.” Her eyes were luminous; their gold seemed to reflect the sky, tossing green and bronze in their depth with swirling intensity. I want you again. I want you under the eaves of the shade. Come to me.

Duncan launched himself up from the dock, from his trance in the sunlight. The spell she was weaving (as you always do, my love) was pushing him toward her--he started to jog towards her but Kenzie flitted away (my little firefly), her little feet in the tennis shoes flying out behind her in the grass, cutting across the path and behind the gazebo. As Duncan ran after her the sun dappled through the trees, giving the afternoon a glittering sheen, the affectation of a sepia memory. Because as this moment fades into the next, it really is a memory now, he thought, his heart aching as he chased her, the sound of her excited giggling drifting back to him as she flew down the path which had faded from stone to pounded dirt, and through the pines and oaks that grew abundantly together at the forest opening. I ache for every moment with you that fades from reality and exists only within us forever after. I’d extend every single one of them into eternity if I could. I could never have enough moments with you. Each one is precious gold--I don’t have space in my hands enough to hold them all, and that will always leave me yearning for you, Kenzie. My moonbeam, radiant with hallowed light.

He made it to the space where the trees parted to the path, panting heavily, pausing to press his palms against his knees, dipping down to suck air into his lungs--his hair fell down over his forehead, sweat dripping at the side of his cheek. The heat had begun to feel almost tantric, enveloping him, the weed veering into the space behind his eyes, through the crown of his head, down the back of his neck, through his arms, swirling down his throat and into the warm center of him. Where are you, angel. I’m going to find you. He suddenly ached for her with a terrible craving that made him want to groan aloud. What is this day, the summer wind, the sky, the water, the wood, without you. Where are you.

He jerked his head back up, hands drifting over his shirtless torso, over the sweat that was pooling in the dip of his throat, and peered through the trees. The clearing he knew was inside wasn’t visible from this distance, and Kenzie had disappeared around the dip in the path a few paces ahead. Duncan stepped under the canopy of trees; in the forest now, he thought, and shivered a little despite the heat. He forced himself to walk rather than run; Kenzie wouldn’t have gone far, he knew. She’s expecting me to follow. And once she sees the clearing--her heart won’t let her go on. I know her; as I’ve always known her. He turned around a cluster of Virginia pines at the dip in the path, eyes falling on the stream he knew was here, one that had run here for at least a hundred years. An arching, handmade bridge spanned across it--it had once been a dark wine-red, but was now fading into the russet of the forest, the paint chipping away. Duncan listened carefully; the telltale sound of Kenzie’s giggling echoed ahead, the distant slap of the bottom of her shoes. Then, it stopped, and he heard her gasp of delight--she had reached the clearing, that oasis he had found on a night his heart had ached with loneliness for her.

Duncan stepped over the bridge, glancing down at the clearness of the stream, his heart pounding wildly, his head dizzy. He knew the clearing was nearly upon him, through the denseness of the strange cluster of black oaks ahead. He remembered them because they grew oddly close together, as though they were guarding something; as though they were the gatekeepers for a world beyond, one that was different than this one, tinged with mystery. Their leaves grew heavy, dipping low, shielding the space where the path led through them. Duncan lifted his hand to push them aside, lowering his head between the eaves of them, feeling their many-pronged leaves brushing through his hair; as he cleared them, he lifted his eyes, and his breath caught again, but not from running. Fuck me, he thought. I thought I’d remembered how lovely it is, but I didn’t, not really. And there are more flowers now; so many more. It’s as if they all bloomed for her. They knew she was coming.

Kenzie was kneeling in the center of the round clearing--overhead the trees created a canopy of shade that only let slivers of sunlight down onto her, but these seemed to create a circlet of gold around her head--her halo, he thought, immediately overcome with her loveliness. All around her there were wildflowers; little lavender asters with golden centers, clusters of drooping red fuchsias, and the goldenrods he remembered. There were what seemed like a million tiny white, purple and pink alyssum flowers covering the carpet of the forest floor, too--they seemed to have grown in a circular pattern that cascaded from the outward edge of the clearing in swirls that dipped all the way to the center where she sat, her feet tucked under her little dress, her face leaning down to press her nose into the clusters in front of her, her hands delicately trailing down their stems and petals. Duncan felt dizzy again--this wave burst over him with more power than the first, and he reached out a hand to clutch the nearby trunk of the black oak beside him. The trunk was warm--strangely warm, almost--and its roughness was soothing. It seemed to tether him to reality when nothing else wanted to, not the flowers or the sunlight in her hair, not her little face turned down so angelically, not her little sighs of longing and joy, nor the way the clearing seemed to drift around her, its anchor, its center--the flowers seemed to have gathered around her with purpose, though such a thing could not be.

“Kenzie, baby,” he heard his voice call to her softly, untethered from himself; and when she looked up at the sound of his voice, Duncan felt his breath gasp again. Her eyes were glimmering gold once more; gold like they had been in the complete darkness of their bed that night, in the throes of their passion in the shadows, otherworldly and ethereal; though they were not as intensely strange as the ones he’d seen in his dream of her, they reminded him of those eyes, those galaxies she had inside her, and Duncan felt the weight of a universe pressing down on him inside the moment, inside that clearing. He went to her, hearing her speaking to him from inside the halo of where she was sitting; come to me, come to me, Duncan, come here my love.

Yes, angel. Yes, Queen of Roses.

She reached up to him, and Duncan lowered himself into her arms; the clearing was cool, strangely so, drying the sweat from his skin, and there was no breeze here, more strangely still; the trees must grow so closely the wind can’t penetrate them, Duncan thought; but that didn’t seem quite true. He could see the dips of the trees beyond through the circle here; knew that any breeze of earth would easily be able to drift through into the space. But there was only stillness, stillness in her arms. Duncan let his hands drift up into her hair, tangling in the waves, now soft and dry. The scent of the flowers was rising up to him, the dizziness he’d felt at the edge of the clearing dissipating; a deep need for her replaced it, a painfully clear desire to give himself to her in this quiet, secluded place, this place that seemed to be brimming with finespun power. Kenzie’s eyes were coaxing him to a euphoric state of abandon, and the laughter she’d sent out behind her moments ago had metamorphosed to a look of absolute trust on her small features, in the hugeness of her eyes; all her trust, and all the holy sweetness of her power over him reflected therein.

“This place is sacred, Duncan,” she whispered, and the hairs at the back of his neck rose at her words; at the fragility of the tips of her fingers on the bareness of his ribs. “This place feels like it’s part of another world.”

“Maybe it is,” he whispered back, lowering his face to her cheek, brushing his lips down the skin there, tiny kisses that pressed in measured holiness until they reached her mouth, opening to him, the scent of the flowers drifting up into his senses again as her face turned against him, her hair falling through his fingers. Kenzie was sliding into his lap, her legs parting to press the space between them flush to him, their mouths still crushed together, deeper, the small movement of her under him shivering out; he clutched at her as she rose to lean over him, her hair falling into his eyes, against his curls, chestnut-gold in russet-copper. Her hands were on his jaw again, her favorite spot, her hands belong there, lifting him into her, tasting him as though he were the sweet nectar of some wild fruit, and Duncan gave himself over to her, to the need he felt falling onto him from every fiber of her. Her power here, in this place, in this bed of flowers; it was absolute, and he knew it, could sense it. Like the Mirror, like this place--I belong to her. My world turns to her whims, her tiniest pleasures; my life is hers, my toil, every breath from my lungs a prayer to her wonders.

“I’m yours,” he whispered up into her mouth. “Kenzie, you must know how much, oh, god--how I belong to you--”

“I do know, beloved,” and her smile against him made him shiver; the Kenzie in this moment had an overwhelming flood of golden power rushing out of her into him, and he felt weak with it; weak and desirous, overcome with her. “Now, lay back, sweet Prince. Your angel needs your attention.”

Duncan let her push him, the weight of her fingers so slight and yet so entire, into the coolness of the long grass under them. His head crushed into the clusters of tiny alyssum that carpeted the clearing; for a moment, he saw himself through her eyes, dizzyingly, and knew it seemed to her that he wore a crown of flowers for her, oh love, Lord Hades, I know how you’ve dreamt of flowers in my hair, but to see them in yours too, is a delight to my eyes. In this I know you truly are mine; with these flowers I kiss you, I give you my gold.

Kenzie stood; Duncan went to lift up to her, but she shook her head with the tiniest movement, and he knew not to move; he watched her from the alcove of flowers leaning over him, watched her pull the dress over her head, untie the bikini and slide it from her thighs, her shoes discarded to a drifting patch of grasses. She was sweetly naked now; her nakedness so beautiful to him in this place, this (sacred) clearing where once he knew he’d longed for her, and where, now, miraculously, he longed for the reality of her before him, knew she held him in her sway here, knew the gold of her was brimming with power not of the world they knew; that here it was greater, somehow, it was closer to the Kenzie he had seen in the achingly beautiful dream, knew, without knowing how he knew, that she was closer to that Kenzie now than she was to the one who existed outside this circle. She lowered herself onto him, straddling him at the waist, and he shuddered to feel the lips of her sex press down onto the sensitive space below his ribs. She leaned down over him, hair tossing into the alyssum beside his face, her knowing grin shaking his heart into adamant supplication; I need you Kenzie, I need you, need you, bless me, let me give all of myself to you, I beg you--

“You need me, do you, sweet Prince? You, he of great riches and great beauty, lord of many houses, overseer of shadows, soon to be king of many lands--”

“All of these are nothing in your eyes, Goddess of the Golden Bower, High Princess of the Garden of All Delights, Angel of the Hidden Sphere wherein is held the knowledge of all things, supremely exalted in heaven--” for a moment, someone else seemed to speak through Duncan’s lips; he understood his words but not from whence they came, knew their shape, but could not comprehend their meaning--and then--these are her names, he knew. These names belong to my Kenzie, they are her names that I forgot.

Kenzie dipped away from him, and his nerves thrilled as she pressed her hand harshly against his mouth, stopping his words; he watched her expression contort in a way he couldn’t quite decipher; he could feel the rise of her lust, and feel that she could not bear the words he spoke; that somehow they were too much, too great, or too raw a wound for her to allow. Some other self, she thought, the one I was before, the one my mind can’t seem to see, the one my heart can’t comprehend. Her finger went between his lips, pressing hard into his tongue, demanding. No more words, beloved, I can’t stand the beauty of them, I’m--I’m not ready. Not yet.

“Fuck me, Duncan. Right now. I need you.”

“Kenzie, up,” he murmured, and demandingly he pressed his palms against the redness he’d left along her ass cheeks, loving the mingled gasp of pleasure and pain that fell out of her, could feel it wiping her mind clean of her uncertainty; Kenzie’s hands fell above his head into the sweet grass as her cunt bruised against his mouth and his tongue pressed, immediate, into her swollen clit, urging it to sodden preparation. Her voice sobbed up into the trees that covered the clearing, and Duncan thrilled to know no one could hear them; this belongs only to us, no one else can have any of it, and his hands drifted up her back, pressing her onto his face. Her wordless cries almost sounded like a song to him; an otherworldly, ethereal one, fitting for a place such as this, this circle that seemed like the portal to another world, surrounded by the black oaks. He pushed his tongue further into her, dipping it down to the opening of her sex, up to her clit, down the side of either lip of her, making her thighs shake against the sides of his jaw, and he kept his eyes open, open to look at the intensity of her beauty; there it is again, her halo, he knew as her head dipped back and her throat moved, shivered for him, her hair falling back in a waterfall against his fingers, and this time it’s not the sunlight, it’s not the dappled light in the clearing, it’s real, it really is her halo, and it’s like nothing in this world, this mundane world made of rules that bind us to the earth, but another world where we had wings unfathomable to human eyes, where we had clothing woven from a thread that doesn’t exist here. Her halo is the essence of her divinity. My Kenzie is truly a goddess. I can feel that here. In this place, I can see that. Here, I worship her in the truth of her golden light. And he knew.

Oh my fucking god, Kenzie. You are Holy. You’re fucking holy; you really are an angel, or something like an angel--there was a time, somewhere, somehow, where you were something else, a being made of light, higher than humankind. I saw it that first night, when I loved you so immediately; I saw it the first time we fucked in the low light of that dark bed and I longed to be by your side forever from that day, when the thought of you leaving me was like a knife in my heart. This is just the beginning--just the tip of the knowing. More is coming.

“Baby, let me fuck you,” Kenzie’s voice was half whisper, half a cry that rattled at the edges of his mind and she lifted her sex away from him, making him gasp to lose her--she was sliding down his skin, the feeling of her smooth as silk and hot as low fire, to the waistband of his jersey shorts--she snapped it back demandingly, her fingers closing around the base of his cock, sliding down further, further, her mouth dipping onto him for just a moment, scattering wetness along his length, then she lowered herself onto him, so quickly and sleekly he cried out, overcome with her--Kenzie lowered her palm against his cheek and her fingers dug into his skin, down against the incline of the top of his throat, and she was pushing into him, forcing her hand into him, and she murmured “give your hard cock to me, Duncan--” and then she was keening her hips down onto him, riding him with so much force that he felt white spasms of light, like the crackling edges of a bonfire, around the edges of his vision.

“Fuck me, give yourself to me, let me fuck you, give yourself, give to me, dearest love, fairest of all men, and mine alone, chosen one--” Kenzie’s head fell back again, her words drifting into the stillness of the clearing, the coolness, the solitude that was blessed and golden, the holy sweetness of this place that, in this moment, was theirs and theirs alone. Her nipples were achingly hard in the soft, shaded light; Duncan’s hands came up to them as she rode against him, biting harshly into his lip to keep himself from rushing over the edge already; his thighs were prickling with the softness of her swollen ass pressing down onto him, and she was so wet--so exquisitely tight against him--

This place seemed to heighten everything in his body; his sight seemed sharper, bringing every detail of her small features into clarity, the impossible depth in her eyes, the shivering length of her eyelashes, her little lips and their tiny, gathered dew, the little round dip at her nose, the scattered blush at her cheeks, the strands of her hair plastered to her neck in her passionate abandon. The sensation of her in his hands and along his cock was nearly unbearable; he fought the urge to scream, to burst into tears, and the scent of her held a sweetness that seemed, like the air, the aura of this place, not of the earth. The scent of a moonbeam, of moonlight scattered on some place that is paradise--the Garden of All Delights, is that what I called it? Is that what I said to her a moment ago, inside this place, halfway between a dream and reality?

Duncan gripped under Kenzie’s arms and forced her down, crushing his mouth against hers; the heat of her naked body was so exquisite, the warmth of her cunt so divine, he wished she could absorb him inside her somehow, cradle him in the cocoon of her light.

“That’s it, baby,” she whispered, and she gasped, “give yourself to me, just like that, ride up into me, like that, fuck me in these sweet flowers, in this sacred place--because we’re fucking holy, baby, when we’re together, it’s fucking holy, isn’t it--it’s sacred--”

“God, yes, I can feel it, it’s like a--unnnh, it’s like you’re made of sunlight, and you’re sucking me inside you--it’s so fucking lovely, Kenzie, baby--I can’t fucking stand it--”

“Fuck, baby, this place--what is it--” Kenzie was gasping, and to Duncan it felt as though her body were lifting him up into her, not just their skin pressing together here, in the dark green grass bursting with wildflowers, but their souls, twining in a meditation that seemed to exceed the boundaries of what he thought possible; like her wings are there again.

“I don’t know, baby, I don’t know, but fuck--unngh--you feel so good--”

Her hand came down again, against his mouth, her index and middle fingers pressing inside his teeth, her hips rhythmic now, back and forth along his length, his fingers coming up to dip into her clit and soothe the deep wetness there, pressing the lips of her to the sides. He could feel it now; the vibrating air, the space of this sacred circle, feel that it wasn’t just their own imagining; for a moment it was as though the circle of black oaks became unstuck, and the spirals of the flowers growing in their twisting pattern turned to a hidden beltway of galaxy, and they had ascended to that other place, the place of in their dreams, made of the sunrise colors that were moving beyond any language he had ever heard, the colors of time and things beyond time.

And then--then they were crashing back to earth, the circle tethered once more, locking back into its place, and Kenzie was falling against him, and he felt his orgasm rushing up into her intense heat, closed his eyes in his overwhelmed idolatry of her--I am the cup that runs over with the abundance of your grace--and they were coming together, crying into each other’s mouths, her little fingers on his face, flitting over his eyelids and along this stubble and against his forehead, beating softly like butterfly wings as she shuddered down onto him and he held her as tightly as he could, crushing her into him, wishing they could be together like this always, that the moment of their inevitable parting would simply never come.

------

Kenzie was laying against him now, in the crook under his arm (her spot, the place she was torn away from me); her hair was scattered back, his hand toying with its soft strands, absent-mindedly. They lay in the center of the clearing, the flowers still crushing around his head, the soft afternoon light scattering through the black oaks onto the long green grass that grew so strangely verdant here. Duncan had noticed, with a strange sort of calm, that the trees outside the circle would drift now and again in the wind; but that the leaves of these trees, the ones that created the circle, did not.

“I almost never want to leave this place,” he murmured to her. Kenzie’s eyes were closed, her cheek on the corner of his chest, her breath small and calm; she’d slipped her bikini bottoms back on, as Duncan had pulled the waistband of his shorts back over his softening cock, but she was still topless, the softness of her breasts pressing against him. “There’s something about it that’s so peaceful. Like the rest of the world can’t get in. Like only we can.”

“Baby,” and Kenzie was turning her head up to him. “What were those names you called me before? They were so beautiful. What did they mean?”

“Kenz, I--” Duncan drifted a hand over his eyes. “I don’t know, honestly. I’m not sure what I was saying. It’s something about--something about this place. It put the thought of them inside me. Like I was remembering something I’d forgotten. Like when you relearn words in a language you haven’t heard for a long time.”

Kenzie didn’t say anything more, just brought her fingers up to his stubbled chin. She seemed to be thinking, but as he knew she could if she willed it, she seemed to have closed her thoughts away from him again. He ached to hear her; he pulled her in closer to him, so her leg dipped over his thigh in their flowery bed. The light was lowering; he wondered what time it was, how long they’d laid here in the quietness. He lifted a hand up and picked a pink alyssum from where a cluster dipped down over them, bringing it around a wave of her golden hair and weaving it through, then did the same with a white flower, and a purple one--eventually there were a dozen flowers he’d braided into her, and Kenzie was smiling at him quietly, not moving, head crooked under her arm, eyes sleepy but watchful.

“I like you with flowers in your hair too, baby,” she murmured. “For our wedding you should wear a crown of flowers, too.”

“Thought you hadn’t decided if you were going to say yes to me or not,” he whispered, hoisting himself up to look down at her now. Goddess of the Golden Bower. That had been one of them.

“I mean our theoretical wedding.”

He grinned at that, then drifted back into seriousness. There are things I realize now, Kenzie. It’s like I can’t speak them out loud though, not yet. Is that what you’re closing away from me? The things you know about me, too? Did you hear me when we fucked? Did you hear that I know you’re holy? That you really are some kind of angel--that you were, once?

Kenzie made no indication that she heard these thoughts from him, either--she was drifting up from her sleepy position, the flowers he’d woven into her hair shivering around her shoulders. She reached her hands up into the air, legs tucked under her, and stretched, yawning, cat-like. Duncan immediately reached for her, pulling her against him, overcome with her again, lost for words, fumbling to speak. Kenzie seemed to sense his emotion, and pressed her lips in an earnest kiss into his neck, whispering “oh Duncan, how I love you,” and he knew there was nothing he needed to say, then--that everything between them was known, and he could enfold himself safely into her, and the outside world was impossibly far away in the understanding of her love.

They lingered that way for a little while, Duncan’s hand in her hair, the tiny remnants of the scent of roses and vetiver on her skin mixed in with the alyssum and the sun-dried earthiness of her hair now, then Kenzie pulled away from him and stood, gathering her other clothes and her shoes, reaching out her hand. He pulled himself up to her, his body immediately towering over her tiny one, and she pulled the bikini top around her waist, turning to him and brushing her hair aside; Duncan laced it back together, kissing her neck.

“We left the picnic basket on the dock, I guess we should go get it,” Kenzie said, glancing up into the black oaks one more time; Duncan followed her eyes to where the round patch of sky above was deepening into a darker blue, the hints of oncoming sunset beginning to bleed around the edges of the trees. Soon the stars will be out, baby. You’ll see.

“We should gather some of these flowers first,” he said, pulling the dress gently out of her hands and gathering it so she could dip her head into its neckline. Duncan straightened the hem around her thighs as she pulled her arms through it, then turned to pick some, but Kenzie stopped him, grasping his fingers.

“No, baby, let’s do it tomorrow. Let’s come here tomorrow morning, when the sun is rising--and gather them in the sunrise. Can we do that? I want to be--I want to gather them that way. In the sunlight.”

Duncan nodded. “Of course, baby. Whatever you want. That sounds lovely.”

She was pulling him out of the flowers now; out of the halo of oaks, back into the forest. As they left the shrouded enclosure of the huge trees, growing so closely together in their strange way, Duncan breathed out a long sigh--the air seemed to suck back into him, the wind immediately raising the hairs on his arms. It was as though they’d walked through a door back into the outside world from the shadowed interior of a house, its floors made of long grasses and wildflowers.

“That’s so--” Kenzie hesitated, pausing, faltering. “That place, Duncan.”

“You said it yourself, Kenzie, and you were right. It’s sacred. It was the first place I felt you, even when we were so far away from each other once. It was the first time I knew you were out there somewhere--that I missed you.”

She nodded, eyes bright, hand tight inside his. “It’s thin there, isn’t it?”

Duncan knew what she meant; he felt it, deep within his bones, the certainty of it. Yes, my love. It’s thin there; and the barrier between this world and whatever else there is--whatever is outside it--is barely there in that place. We felt another world bumping up against us there; our past. Our future. And other things. Things too great to even describe.

“Yes, Kenzie. I think so. I think you’re right.”

Kenzie nodded a little again, then, clutching his hand tightly, she led him down the path to the bridge; he could hear the eerie cry of a loon far off in the distance somewhere--probably on the lake--and he shivered, threading his fingers against hers, contented to be led by her. Led anywhere. Led into hell if you willed it. Led into an abyss if that was your wish. But no. I know you’ll lead me into heaven. I know it, and it amazes my soul.

Soon they were out of the woods. A cool gust of wind drifted toward them from the lake, smelling of earthy rot, grass baked in sunlight, and the oncoming dew of the evening, and as Duncan lifted his eyes to its serene surface, he was moved anew by its beauty in the oncoming sunset--the sky had begun to turn shades of pink and apricot, and they reflected on the lake’s face with a passionate kiss.

“Wow, Duncan. It looks like…” Kenzie trailed off, squeezing his hand. Her eyes misted, glancing earthward to hide her emotion; but he knew--for I see into your thoughts, beloved, and therefore, into your soul--what she was trying to say. It looks like that other place. The one with colors we can’t describe. I know, baby. I know. She looked up to him, went up on her toes, gripping into his bare shoulders to kiss him. Holy. He felt her shiver a little as another gust of wind fell over them, the flowers he’d twined into her hair falling against her cheek.

“Go get a sweater, baby, it got chilly. I’ll get the picnic basket.”

“Can we make a fire? The weather tonight is perfect. Then we can lay under the stars all night, until the sun rises.” She was grinning against him, her little chin pressing into his skin, her eyes inside his, eyelashes so long, her softness like the rose petals that had been in her hair last night--like the petals she’d slipped inside his wallet, a memory. I want to remember every minute I’ll ever have with you, I wish I could, I wish I could memorize every tiny part of everything.

He pressed his hand down from her head. “Of course we can. I can’t wait to show you the spot--the place where you can see everything. Every star in the sky. And tonight’s so clear--baby, it’s like everything is coming together. I feel so--it’s like they did this for us--”

“The Fates.”

“Yes. Kenzie--I love you.”

“And I love you. To the moon and back.”

Duncan’s heart clenched, knowing that was what she said to Madeline; knowing it was sacred, special, held close, shared between two women, tied to the feminine parts of her, secret and achingly personal. Knowing that saying it to him was a wildly intimate permission from her; knowing that the thing that had passed between them in the holy embrace of their passion under the black oaks was a piece of something vast and yet, somehow, coming together, like a thousand intricate threads of a tapestry that encompassed a universe. He felt as though he’d passed some sort of deeply difficult test; one of utter trust, one innately tied to her femininity.

To share ourselves with each other means to open our hearts to each other utterly; not just our hopes, but our secret fears, our quiet anxieties, our uncertainty, and all our vulnerabilities. In the woods, under those trees, flowers in my hair, I touched something divine in a way I hadn’t before. You felt it, too, didn’t you, my Kenzie?

Her eyes heard him, and recognized him, russet, green and gold. Yes, Duncan. Yes, my exalted love.

Kenzie turned away from him, lightning-quick--he watched her run down the path and disappear around the gazebo; a minute later he saw a warm light spill from its opening as she flicked on the lantern there, then he watched her little shape flitting out and up to the deck, hair swaying, her shoes slapping up the path, the sliding door opening then slamming behind her. The swing drifted, creaking in the breeze--the loon called out again, from somewhere far away on the lake, the canoe slapping against the dockside. Duncan shivered in the sudden solitude, walking down to the dock to gather the basket up, gazing out on the color reflected on the surface of the lake once more, lost in thoughts of otherworldly vistas, of ethereal, angelic clouds. He turned back to the house, lost inside his thoughts of the wood, the strange names he’d called her in his passion, the new knowledge, the certainty of her divinity--one he still couldn’t find words to describe to her. Maybe under the stars I’ll find them. Maybe with the universe looking down on us, I can speak what I know in my heart to her.

Maybe then I can tell her what I know now: that she really is an angel. Or she was. Or she will be. 

That she truly is divine.

[cantusecho-archive]

(Episode 6 thoughtssssss aaahaaaa

Let me get this out the way; KNEW MIKU WOULD BE FINE. It was a classic cliffhanger that happened within Symphogear before, haha.

Moving on.

Episode starts out with Hibiki and Tsubasa coming across the scene of where Miku and Elfnein were last seen. Of course, their minds immediately think the worse (in their situation, and from their perspective, I’d understand why).

Though the amusing thing about this opening scene though is that me and my friend roleplay from the series, which also includes us writing things after each episode. I wrote Miku’s bag being left behind, covered in blood and Hibiki ends up finding it. Only thing that’s different is that I had the body of that guy still there while in the show it wasn’t. Lol.

Just amusing, I’m sorry haha.

Anyway, everyone is back at HQ awaiting results for the blood to actually confirm that it didn’t belong to either Miku or Elfnein.

I might be saying this a bit too early, but I greatly enjoyed Chris showing her lowkey support for Hibiki the whole time.

(I’ll mention the other one later)

During this scene, it’s really showcasing Tsubasa’s current state. 

This falls back to Hibiki’s gut feeling of this being a diversion, but Tsubasa tells her that they need to just listen to their orders instead. But Tsubasa literally appearing to look like she’s about to get on Shirabe and Kirika for their comments, even though they didn’t mean it that way in terms of blaming her, is scary. Kirika’s expression here I think explains it all.

Maria steps in to cut Tsubasa off, while Chris uses Hibiki as an example that she’s still trying to do her job despite Miku and Elfnein being missing and/or possibly dead.

Maria tries to ask Tsubasa what’s wrong but all she does is smack her hand away before leaving. Again, from their point of view, they don’t know about this whole “seal” thing that Millaarc put on Tsubasa, which may be influencing Tsubasa’s mood. But Tsubasa immediately feels bad for hitting Maria, at least I think so based on her expression, so she knows what she’s doing isn’t the way to handle it. But I suppose she doesn’t know any other way to deal with it all.

And of course, Fudo comes in to make everything worse. He immediately tells Tsubasa she failed, and she’s quick to say that she will fulfill her duty as a sentinel and not let it happen again. Once again, this way of thinking has been imprinted in Tsubasa since she was young, and after she finally started breaking free of it, it’s right back on her again.

Thing about this whole scene is that I’m still trying to figure out how that “seal” works. 

It seems to make Tsubasa hallucinate, which is very dangerous and can potentially get her to harm someone close to her. But the way Fudo used it here seems to mean that he can control her actions or put ideas/things in her head? Him specifically saying “this isn’t your battlefield”, which I’m assuming is him referring to S.O.N.G, and “if you feel lost, feel free to visit me” just makes it sound as if he’s purposefully attempting to lead Tsubasa astray and basically not worry/deal about her friends. He wants her there, with him, to be his “sword/weapon” to protect his country.

He’s adamant about her having Kazanari blood in her, yet Tsubasa was defiant against him near the end of AXZ saying “the blood of a girl named Amou Kanade flows through these veins!”. Maybe that’s partially a reason why he’s manipulating her in such a way. He makes the concert tragedy happen, which ends up breaking her confidence in thinking she’s not able to protect anyone efficiently enough, even blaming the fight (and possibly kidnapping?) of Miku and Elfnein on her. Then using that “seal” ability somehow to have her cause more doubts about herself, yet turn it around and say that he can come to her if she feels lost, which she must be feeling right now after all this stuff.

It’s just ironic since he’s the one that caused all this and is basically roping her in. At least, that’s how it feels to me.

Tsubasa’s journey will be interesting to see through to the end, honestly. I feel confident she will break through but this is a lot of mental stress on her to say the least.

Soon after this, everyone finds out that the blood doesn’t belong with either Miku or Elfnein, which relieves Hibiki a lot.

(shout out to Chris’ lowkey support just by a look lmfao)

They wonder why they’d want to kidnap Miku, since they can understand why they’d want Elfnein since she’s an alchemist. And so Ogawa and Genjurou take the time to explain to them their “theory”.

In the meantime, they flashed back to show what really happened with Miku and Elfnein. As assumed, the guy was the one that got killed. But the shock of it all caused Elfnein and Miku to faint.

So I suppose Millaarc uses that to her advantage since she probably would have taken them both anyway.

I’ve been wondering for a bit if Noble Red would actually know about Miku being freed from original sin and being able to use the divine power, but clearly they do. Lol. Makes me wonder if they just knew based on their observation, or from Fudo himself, which I assume Fudo told them. But then again, I’ve heard ideas of this not being part of his plan and if that’s the case, then they found this out on their own.

So, with their hideout being the Chateau de Tiffauges, they wanted Elfnein because they need Carol’s body to activate something within it.

Those dolls look like autoscorer bodies/parts? Not sure what they are exactly but this is what they want Elfnein to activate with Carol’s body. I can’t even fathom what the heck this means so I won’t try. Lol.

This next part isn’t exactly important but I found it interesting--- They showed in one of the preview pics with Miku floating towards a light but when I zoomed in, it almost looked like there was a figure reaching out to her and it was.

It could just be a figure for Shem-Ha but Miku was merely lying next to it, yet it reached out to her as she slept. Hnnnnnng, Miku. D:

Now, in terms of Tsubasa, I really think Maria will end up helping her break out of this somehow. I mean, even she’s clearly frustrated that she can’t reach out to Tsubasa and actually help her.

I can’t say how she’d help, but the thing about Maria (I think) is that she’s someone in Tsubasa’s life that’s similar to Kanade but NOT a replacement for her. Maria is her own person, she’s not like Kanade at all, but she’s closer to Tsubasa in a way that’s similar to how Kanade was. Like, she’s able to be on stage with Tsubasa for one, as well as managed to actually help Tsubasa with some personal issues back in GX.

I can’t really explain it, but I don’t see Maria as some sort of replacement for Kanade. People may as well say that about Hibiki back in season 1. But both Hibiki and Maria fulfill different roles in Tsubasa’s life that may seem familiar to Kanade, but isn’t replacing her at all.

side note: little Maria and little Serena is so dang precious, it’s a crime. It was so nice to see Serena being the angry one compared to Maria being the remorseful/pleading one, haha. It was a nice look into their dynamic, regardless how short it was.

Also, there’s still this whole thing with Maria, these songs and Airgetlam. They all get brought up in this episode haha.

She was singing ‘Apple’ within this scene and says this afterwards:

Perhaps due to her always wondering what the song that Shem-Ha played.

side note: Ogawa basically doing ninja tricks in a damn car against Vanessa is the funniest thing ever because I never would have expected that to happen. Lol.

But once again, Vanessa and them seem to know things in advance, like Airgetlam.

Vanessa says she’s just kidding after this but don’t think she was at all since it’s clear that Airgetlam was merely named out of convenience. With Maria’s bio stating that Airgetlam is unknown, along with the official keywords stating that the “x” in Airgetlam’s code means that it has an unknown sacrist, it’s clear no one knows what it is.

It’s almost hinted to be part of one of the Annunaki/Custodian’s arm that was missing? I think it was Enki but I could be wrong since I didn’t go back to check. Between Enki and Enil. And even the silver thing?? shown at the end of the opening makes me think that it’s referencing Maria’s relic?? I’m still confused about the whole scorpion thing in the opening but I’ve also heard people believing that the scorpion represents Miku because she’s a “Scorpio” in astrology. And with her taking the divine power, perhaps something about Airgetlam can do it. But that also clashes with Hibiki’s Gungnir being considered the “god killer”? Because Hibiki took on the divine power at the end of AXZ, but it was officially confirmed that she was proven to be in a weaker state due to the Gungnir clashing with the power. But this brings up that it’s possible for Miku to full take on this power since she doesn’t have that limit.

Which leads into Shem-Ha being activated, and Maria reacting to it once again.

And another cocoon appears.

I’m led to believe this is Miku, just like how it was for Hibiki at the end of AXZ.

And that’s how the episode ends. Lol. I...really don’t even know what to say about this cliffhanger. I’m honestly surprised this is happening in episode 6? Granted they made AXZ and XV together so the pacing might seem weird to us since we’re so used to all this sort of stuff happening near the end of the season. I think them making the two seasons together will help them with pacing in the end.

XV, in my opinion, has just been pushing everything to the forefront which again, might be because of them making the two seasons together. I’m still trying to wait before talking about pacing stuff and simply enjoy the ride. I’m wondering how dragged out this will be and I don’t mean in a bad way.

I’d want this to be a bit dragged out instead of being resolved IMMEDIATELY in the next two episodes. For example, if Hibiki really will sing “Kimi Dake Ni” in the show, I’d want there to be some good build, meaning all this won’t be solved in one episode but a few.

I DON’T KNOW I just want good build, haha. So I’m hoping for that to be a thing. Previews and such will be taking place tomorrow for the next episode so we’ll see what’s in store!

Last minute note: The episode was titled Xenoglossia, which means “a person who is able to write or speak a language they did not know/couldn’t acquire from natural means”. Initially I thought this was in reference to Maria, with her and the whole thing about the song and whatnot. But my friend said she thought it may have been Miku dealing with all the divine power and such.

It has to do with the Curse of Balal more than likely, so it makes the most sense for it to possibly refer to Miku and all that? No telling for sure but yep, that’s all I got haha.)

[crowtoed]

WELCOME TO ANOTHER EPISODE OF:

Crow has watched the Deutschland video waaaaay too much but keeps finding things. Let’s preface this with I am not German, have never lived in Germany, but I have a degree in history with a minor in anthropology, so maybe that helps a bit.

0:06- This scene is set after the Battle of the Teutoburg Forest, but I still find it funny that Till’s the scout/individual slaughtered. The disgraced Roman commander who famously lost Augustus’ legions was Publius QuincTILius Varus and I laughed a history nerd’s laugh. It is a lonely laugh. 0:39- There are 3 bodies hanging from the tree. Perhaps a reference to the three slaughtered legions of Varus?

1:13- The boys (sans Till’s body) are wheeling Germania, who’s still dressed in her GDR outfit through a burning charnel house/crypt. VlogDave on youtube has posited her being in the wheelchair representing a feeling of weakness in identity or purpose. Maybe post unification she’s still reeling trying to figure out who she is? The contemplative look says a lot and the boys trying to usher her calmly past this inferno o’ skeletons, nobody bothered. 1:35- Germania’s planting her standard in the battlefield, summoning the boys. Perhaps symbolizing how nationalism has the intense power to rouse people. Some are winners (Reesh, Schneider), but most are losers (Till and Flake shish-kebab’d). And as shown later, everybody ends up dead in gruesome ways. 2:01- Till’s expression is like somebody told him he has a press interview in an hour. 2:08- Paul’s tiny glasses are a fucking delight. 2:47- Four bodies hanging from the archway. NO IDEA WHAT THEY REPRESENT, other than the lighting is making them look different colors (green?). 2:48- So another theory from VlogDave is that the monks gorging symbolizes the corruption of the church during the Middle Ages. You have the church feasting on the country’s bounty while a group of trapped people (maybe representing the majority peasantry) are supporting their gluttony (and a few other sins) just barely out of sight. WHILE PLAGUE RATS ARE RUNNING AROUND (soooo 14th/15th century). ALSO notice how Olli doesn’t participate was as much gusto as.. say… Schneider (gdi, Doom). He almost tries to console Germania. This may sound bunk, but I think Olli is supposed to symbolize Martin Luther and the Protestant Reformation. 2:52- In an alternative universe where Rammstein was a more mainstream rock band, this is what Till’s hair would really look like. Don’t think about it too much. Also this is not what I had in mind when I envisioned Till’s head emerging from between a woman’s legs. 3:04- SCHNEIDER WHAT IS YOUR FUCKING FACE, SIR. WOW. 3:21- When U see an old pic of urself from high school. No but seriously, clever set of shots to represent looking back on your own harsh history. 3:51- Flake’s face has so much expression and character. Love it. 3:58- Huuuh looks like they shaved or applied a prosthetic to Flake’s head for the WWII scene. 4:03- Paul has an extra apple box to make him at the same height as Till. 4:06- Again, VlogDave’s got some great commentary on Germania and Richard’s eye trauma in the WWII scenes. The English translation would be “to turn a blind eye”. In addition, Reesh may also be sporting a Mensur scar or ‘Schmisse’, acquired from academic fencing. They were all the rage for fashionable and socially elite Germans from the mid-19th to the end of WWII, with a lot of Nazi officers having them. His scar being on the left might symbolize an injury from an opponent from “the left side”. 4:19- As a former vintage clothing store clerk, the boys’ outfits in the RAF/70s era slay me. Especially Olli’s corduroy jacket and Reesh’s razor-sharp lapels. 4:34- Germania is always in the colors of her nation’s flag. While she doesn’t have any red on her in the prison/WWI scenes, she’s in the colors of the Empire of Prussia and one of the iconic hussar uniforms. During the period Princess Victoria Louise did photoshoots wearing a similar uniform to inspire morale- which goes with Germania’s role as icon. 4:41- I like the comparison and combination of the Nazi bookburning and the Early Modern witch burning being of the same spirit- the willful and ignorant destruction of humanity. And oh look, the church is complicit in both. (Not surprising with Rammstein’s attitude towards -particularly the Catholic- church). 4:49- Some folks have posited that Germania in modern attire making out with Till’s severed head symbolizes looking back and trying to romanticize the past. Which is futile, because the past is dead and also pretty gross. Seriously, babe, you’ve been holding on to that thing for- what? 2000 years? Also he doesn’t seem that into it... 4:51- BOOM, Saint Hubert’s stag. Religious and also alcoholic symbolism! 4:51- Also I think this is meant to be the future. We have a repentant, pregnant Germania in white. Also she’s tending the busts of the band, which are a reference to the Walhalla Memorial. Her role is venerating the good aspects of culture/history. The boys also have some brass balls inferring that they’ll be memorialized with the other movers and shakers of German culture in the future. Germania seems uncertain, scared. She isn’t confident in the role and needs the assistance of the future!boys to give birth (TO A NEW NATIONAL IDENTITY?) 5:00 ish- I think the following are Germania remembering her past and how things fell apart or ended in each of these epochs, which might explain the rapid fire editing and melding together. 5:13- Till in a kettle helm and Paul holding a flaming goddamned sword (he thinks he has divine might on his side?) is my favorite. 5:16- So apparently these sweet babies are Leonbergers, which are a German breed that almost went extinct in the wake of WWII. They’ve since made a comeback. I think it’s meant to symbolize a more peaceful Germany. You have the German Shepards (with a reputation as a more martial breed) in the past- as well as wolves- then for the future you have these notoriously gentle boofs. They’re sweeter, hard workers, but still very German. Also Till has a history of putting his family in music videos. 5:53- I’M PROUD OF YOU OLLI. 6:00- FUCK NAZIS. 6:14- Till, your jacket is too small on you. Which if it’s vintage, makes sense, because you are a meat mountain and vintage runs small. Also Reesh has seen this all before. 6:18- Till is fucking a bearskin rug while cosplaying as Erich Honeker. This is therapeutic considering his history with the Stasi, I suspect. 6:20- Her pose reminds me of a tomb effigy you see in early modern churches. 6:30/31- I don’t know what this means, but Olli is holding a puppy so everything’s all right. 6:32- She doesn’t seem to know what to do with herself. Whether this is uncertainty as the symbol of a peaceful nation after centuries of war and atrocities or an allegorical postpartum depression... but... puppies? 6:35- FUCK THIS I WANT TO SEE THE BTS WITH EVERYONE HOLDING PUPPIES. 6:38- Germania has doves attached to her shoes. Another symbol of her in a peaceful role for the modern age. Now the symbolism of the doves being dead, WELL… 6:43- See you later, Space Personification. Additional thought: Germania needed a better hoop skirt, her silhouette in the big red gown was starting bothering me once I’d noticed it.

[theantibridezilla]

Playing with Color...a Crash Course on Hair

I’ve loved playing with color and hair since I was a kid. I was the one who was constantly trying to put my Barbies’ (or rather Christie as Barbies were rare around my house) and other dolls’ hair into complicated styles. Fast forward to when I was old enough to have my autonomy recognized, and I was always interested in seeing what I could do with my hair.

The first time I ever wore extensions was in college and it was a safety net as much as a cute style. I got braids because I wasn’t sure what kind of hair stylists I would find near my university and I didn’t want to take chances. And then I fell in love with extensions and wore them all the time. Then in my mid 20s I went natural and decided that if I wanted to play with texture or color, I would wear extensions, otherwise, I’d embrace my own curl.

And this year, now that I’m a WAHM who isn’t working with conservative clients anymore, I’ve decided to be more adventurous and take risks when it comes to fashion, makeup and hair. So, to that end, I bought this really cute lavender purple wig from Amazon at the beginning of the year, but I put off really playing with it until now. And after a few tweaks, it turned into this super cute style that—although I wouldn’t rock all the time—would make a great alternative on days when I want to be unique.

This got me thinking about how many brides might turn to extensions to help achieve a hairstyle on their big day. But for a lot of people, extensions and wigs can be intimidating if you’ve never worn them. So, to that end, here’s a crash course on wigs. And as a frame of reference, while I normally wear full lace human hair wigs, this purple girl is a synthetic lace front. For the curious, I love fantasy colors, but a color like this isn’t something I’d wear all the time, so a cheapie synthetic is a smarter option.

Unless you go with a custom unit, all stock wigs need to be tweaked

As an example this girl I’m wearing has gone through three rounds of customization. 

When I first bought her, she was ridiculously long. So I trimmed about five to six inches off the back and she’s still sitting at mid back length.

This girl came with about three inches of lace front that was set as a free part—meaning you can part it in any direction you prefer. But I love a deep side part, usually on my right side. So to “force” the part, I tweezed the frontal portion to create this clean part.

Normally, if you order from a better brand/store, you can specify lace colors, even for stock units. But when you order from Amazon and it’s this cheap (less than $40), you get whatever they give you. So, if you’re not “nude” that lace is going to be a big “look at me sign”. To make it look more believable, I used foundation on the underside of the wig to make it better match my color.

With this particular wig, she’s a tad big. So, even though there are adjustable straps to help tighten her down, she’s still a little loose on me. To the point that you could clearly see a space between my head and the wig. So, I sewed a piece of elastic (like what you can buy in fabric stores for making waistbands, etc) into the cap to give me a snugger fit.

Also something I’ve never experienced with a wig was the fact that this was made in such a way that the front hairline sort of stands up like someone lightly teased the hair. In theory it would be cute. But since I don’t glue my wigs down (I like my edges and I have adhesive sensitivities), you could clearly see my sideburns where the wig isn’t attached because the hair had too much height and fell at an awkward place. So, I took a large barrel curling iron (~2 inches) and on a low heat setting (220F to 240F because it’s synthetic and synthetics typically can’t handle heat) gently pressed it onto the front hairline to make it lay down.

Synthetic wigs can be shiny so I used dry shampoo to help create more texture and minimize shine.

If you’re comfortable doing your own hair, all of these types of adjustments are easy to do and can take you as little as an hour total. If you’re not, find a friend who’s good at hair or take your wig/extensions to a stylist who can hook you up.

Although I didn’t do it with this wig, I normally also do a serious cut and color as well. And the color process usually includes bleaching to lift the hair and then a rinse to deposit color. But don’t use bleach on synthetic hair, it’ll damage it!!! I’ve covered these processes before so if you want more info on the basics of hair coloring, head on over to my Overtone or Clairol articles.

Full disclosure because I’m not much of a photo editor normally. But this particular wig, even though it looks undetectable under natural light photography (pic above) and to the naked eye, has a hairline that looks like a beacon when you use a ring light. So, even after all the customizing I did, because I don’t glue my wigs and the front hairline fit is a tad funky, it left a pretty serious line of demarcation. So, I had to go in and clean up that line on my ring light pics because it was ridiculously unsightly.

And since I decided to be adventurous with this wig, I also wanted to do a playful makeup look that hyped up that aspect. So, I created this fun rose gold and purple look that’s also way outside of my comfort zone. I amped up the eyes and placed three (yes three!) different type of highlights to create that high wattage effect you see. Even though this is way bolder than I would normally go, it’s also pretty wearable. I ended up having to run errands after I finished my makeup and got a few compliments for the hour I was out. Full makeup details are below.

And if you’re in love with this wig and want to make it your own, head on over to Amazon and go shopping.

(In the pic above you can see how the hair seems lifted from the roots. That’s the awkward tease effect I was talking about earlier. In the pic below you see that I was able to force the hair to submit with my curling iron.)

Full Makeup Details

Primer: E.L.F. Cosmetics Antioxidant Booster Drops + IT Cosmetics Bye Bye Lines Serum Foundation: Fenty Beauty Pro Filt’r Foundation in 420 Brows: NYX Cosmetics Love Contours All Palette Dark Eyeshadow Pan Brow Contour: E.L.F. Cosmetics Complete Coverage Concealer in Dark Eyeshadow: Morphe 35P Plum Pleasers Palette (all over lid base + dark purple), Coastal Scents 28 Neutral Palette (inner upper lid red-brown shade), Stila Glitter & Glow in Tulip Twinkle (outer shimmer shade), Pixi Beauty Fairy Dust (discontinued—inner shimmer), Naked Cosmetics in Sierra Nevada SN #02 (inner corners), top secret shade (lower lash line) Eye Liner: E.L.F. Cosmetics Cream Liner in Black Lashes: Kawaii Girl Cosmetics Odaiba Under Eye + Contour Concealer: L.A. Girl Cosmetics HD Pro Concealer in Orange, IT Cosmetics Bye Bye Undereye in Deep Rich, and Kevyn Aucoin Etherealist Super Natural Concealer in Deep EC 08 Contour: Black Radiance True Complexion Contour Powder Palette in Medium to Dark Setting Powder: Laura Mercier Translucent Loose Setting Powder in Deep Blush: Kevyn Aucoin Neo-Blush in Sunset Bronzer: Buxom Cosmetics Divine Goddess in Athena & NYX Cosmetics Strobe of Genius Highlight: Kevyn Aucoin  Neo-Limelight in Ibiza Lips: Sara Happ The Pink Slip Lip Slip

Full disclosure: I’m an influencer for Kevyn Aucoin, Pixi Beauty, and e.l.f. Cosmetics. I am also the owner/founder of Kawaii Girl Cosmetics. Occasionally I post affiliate links so I may receive compensation on some of my posts.