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norbezjones · 5 months ago
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Bez Reviews Independent Books 5: The Last Bread Mage
Hey everyone!  I wanna do little reviews/writeups for the independently-published books I find on itch.io, and so, here I am.  I want to review one book every month or two (or quicker, if I’m lucky); it’ll get me reading more, and get authors who often go without feedback some thoughts on their work!  I think it’ll be cool for everyone!
If you want your book reviewed, the only requirement I have is that it’s hosted on itch.io.  Even if itch is just one of many places you can get the book, I want to review books that have a home there at least.  Feel free to get in touch with me with your books—I’m @NorbezJones on Twitter (I refuse to call it X), Bluesky, Pillowfort, Threads, Instagram, and Tumblr; I’m norbez2.0 on Discord.
Looking forward to seeing your books! <3
__________
After I reviewed M. Kirin’s Memory Leak, Kirin ( @maxkirin ) contacted me and asked if I wanted a review copy of another one of their books, The Last Bread Mage!  I said yes, and here we are!  So to make it plain as possible: I was giving a free copy of this book in order to review it.  However, that does not sway my opinion of the book either way, and my opinions are 100% my own.
So, what’s The Last Bread Mage about?  Well, in a fantasy world, the end times have arrived.  A red mage named Fel manages to survive the destruction of his magic school, and he finds a saint named Amara, who insists they must go to The Pinnacle, the center of the world.  Along their journey, they find a knight named Virgen and a thief named Dormi.  The four journey to the center of the world using the help of Fel’s magic, and when they get there, they make a surprising discovery.
There are almost 30 chapters, and between each chapter is a mini-chapter that describes something that ended off the previous chapter and/or will start off the next chapter.  This “something” can be an object, a person, a piece of worldbuilding, anything really.  These mini-chapters are a cool idea and add a lot to making the world feel real.
So, I won’t bury the lead: I liked this book a whole lot.  I really, really love it.  And not because I got it for free—like I said, that does not affect my opinion, and I honestly wish I could go back in time and spend money on this.  I’m going to make this review as in-depth as possible to make up for the fact that barely anybody has read this fucking amazing book.  I have criticisms, obviously, but overall, this book is a 10/10 from me.
It reminded me of the thick sci-fi & fantasy epics I read to pass time in the hospital (to be clear, that is a compliment), immersing myself in deep worlds with rich characters between the pages.  I wish I’d had The Last Bread Mage during my last trip to inpatient.  I’m glad I have it now, at least.
Also, it’s one of those books that the more you read it, the more the meaning of the cover becomes clear & changes.  The last time that happened was with Still Life With Woodpecker, and it was pretty cool to see it happening here.
You might be asking, “Why is it called The Last Bread Mage?”  This is because Fel is the last red mage, and “bread mage” is another name for “red mage” due to the fact that red mages make bread for hungry people.  They basically use their magic to bend the rules of the universe using the three basic components all things are made of: texture, fiber, & substance.  By mixing & matching these basic materials, they can turn one thing into an entirely different thing, like when Fel renders the bars of a cell into bread.  They use up energy when they do that though, so they can’t do it forever—after all, even magic-users are only human.
The magic system in this book is very interesting, and makes for some very unique ways for Fel to get him & his friends out of the perils they end up facing.  It also soon leads to theological implications, because red mages’ magic changes the logic of the universe set by God.  However, God can only “see” the basic components all things are made of, so since a transmuted item retains the same basic materials, in God’s eyes, nothing has changed.  These theological implications are explored in various ways and go in many directions I didn’t expect, like when Fel uses his powers to make him & his friends not exist in the eyes of God.
There are also times where Fel’s powers go awry, though, through no fault of his own.  Basically, the apocalypse occurring in the world is causing the world’s logic to fall apart, drowning continents and making fantastical creatures appear that previously only existed in fiction.  This means that the logic behind Fel’s powers sometimes fails him, such as when he tries to make a doorway for him & Amara to escape down the block from a threat, but when they go through that doorway, they’ve been transported halfway across the world.
By making the story about the logic of the universe and how it can be exploited or make what should go right go wrong, the book carries a consistent throughline throughout the whole thing, even & especially when Fel does his most shocking action near the end of the story.  It’s a very admirable feat.
Speaking of the ending, I do want to talk about that.  If you don’t want to be spoiled, skip to the “SPOILERS END HERE” line.
**SPOILERS START HERE**
When Fel and his friends reach The Pinnacle, they meet a few other folks there—and they meet God.  I wasn’t sure if God was going to end up being real or not, but there it is, fretting as the world comes to an end.  It’s revealed that God made the world in an effort to make order out of chaos, but chaos keeps seeping through, no matter what it does.  It has ended & restarted the world many, many, many times, always bringing back The Chosen Four (Amara & three others named Lumbre, Huesos, & Frio) and The Fated Four (Fel [true name: Felicidad], Virgen [true name: Virtud], Dormi [true name: Domino (a name Dormi finds “fucking stupid”) & Beatrix [true name: Hambre])
Beatrix is a very interesting character.  In this lifetime, she was the butcher in the prison Dormi was locked up in, ruthlessly killing many of Dormi’s friends.  But she regrets being that person, thought she had to make herself into what she now realizes is a monster.  Her & Dormi’s reflection is shown in this passage:
“Dormi and Beatrix‌—‌who had been incredibly lost until this point‌—‌found themselves looking at one another. They thought about the life they’d led and wondered how different things would’ve been had they switched places. It humbled Beatrix, for she had been taught to hate the people of Gritlan, and it scared Dormi, for they were terrified of the butcher they might’ve become.”
The eight of them are always created when a new cycle begins.  Amara remembers every single cycle, every single timeline that has ever existed.  So does God, of course.  And now, it’s time for the world to end for a new cycle to begin.
The Chosen Four all carry pieces of The Worldly Egg, from which a new cycle of the world will hatch.  They take out their pieces, the egg forms—but God doesn’t hatch it.  Instead, God admits to them that it is tired of change, of chaos.  It longs for predictability, and wants this all to end.  It wants this to be the last cycle to ever exist.
Of course, everyone else protests.  So, God asks them all to vote whether this should be the last cycle of the world.  God votes Yea, as it is tired of doing this over & over again.  Everyone else votes, until finally, Fel has to be the tiebreaker. 
But instead of voting, Fel takes the The Worldly Egg and rends it, crunching it down to its most basic materials and absorbing them into himself.  In doing so, Fel absorbs everything existing into himself—the world, his friends, even God—and becomes the new creator of the universe.  The Prince of Absolute Chaos.
He creates a new cycle, brings his friends back.  God is reborn as a child, and as a being who has never had a name, it asks Fel to have his—to be named Felicidad.  Fel says yes, as long as, “[Y]ou must promise me to honor the name by living a life full of joy, laughter, and smiles.  Do you promise?”
The previous God thinks about it—after all, life could be full of “joy, laughter, and smiles” or it can be full of “misery and misfortune”.  In the end, it promises Fel it will uphold the name, and the book ends on that final exchange.
I teared up quite a bit as I read through the ending, and even going back to find quotes for this review made me tear up again.  Saving your friends, saving the world, and even saving God—there’s something very beautiful in that, I think.
I also love how Kirin was able to bring aspects of his Mexican culture into the book, by making all of the true names that of “the first language” within the book’s universe (Spanish).  It’s a nice little touch and I think it’s neat.
**SPOILERS END HERE**
Now for my criticisms.  Like Adrian in Memory Leak, Fel is referred to as “the young man” quite a lot.  Sometimes this happens multiple times in the same paragraph.  This seems to be in an effort to avoid using pronouns instead, but sometimes, it’s better to just say “he”, as someone who also has this problem in eir writing (thanks, OCD [literally, not a figure of speech]!).
That’s basically my only nitpick.  I wish I had more to criticize honestly, but I really don’t.  Good problems to have.
In conclusion, I’ve never been angrier that a book isn’t popular than when I finished this one.  Where are the Tumblr shitposts and multiple pieces of fanart for this book?  I’m so mad lmao!  Also, I imagine I will have that feeling quite a bit as I continue this book review series.
I want to leave off with these words that Amara says to Fel, because I think they’re beautiful:
“‘The only thing worth a damn in this world is being the best versions of ourselves. What does that look like to you, sweet Fel? What does the best version of you look like? It may seem far away, unreachable at the best of times, but you should reach out for this impossible ideal. Be the truest version of yourself. That’s the only thing we can do. Everything else? My dear, everything else is a gamble.’”
So true, bestie.  Amen.
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charliearlet · 2 years ago
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REVENGE attack on @maxkirin !! Fel is my precious baby boy, my son, my darling-
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heliosunny · 1 month ago
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nahhh i've got an idea, dom male reader x mydei. hehehehehehe btw if you can't or do not want to write this, it is okay tho. i like your writing style and how you literally the only yandere accounts that post literally often. thank youuuu!
Yandere!Mydei x M!Reader
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The grand halls of your palace were once filled with warmth. You were a king not of tyranny, but of wisdom and justice. And yet, justice meant nothing to the blade that had pierced your chest.
You lay on the cold floor of your throne room, the warmth of your own blood seeping into your garments.
Among the chaos, a single figure remained still.
"This wasn't supposed to happen."
Your body growing weaker by the second, but Mydei finally moved. He knelt beside you, his hands cradling your face.
"Who did this?"
Mydei was no mere knight in your service—he was something far more devoted.
"Don’t worry, my king." He pressed a hand to your wound as if he could hold you together by sheer will alone. "I'll fix this. I'll fix everything."
-----
The throne was cold beneath him. The weight of the crown—your crown—rested heavy on Mydei’s head, but it meant nothing to him. He had not taken it for power, nor for glory. No, this was merely a temporary position, a means to an end. Until you returned, the throne was nothing more than a placeholder.
And you would return.
The dark mage knelt before him, trembling under his golden gaze. Their face was slick with sweat, exhaustion evident from the unnatural rituals they had performed. Mydei had spent countless nights hunting them down, forcing them to bend reality itself to his command.
"I did what you asked." the mage rasped, "Your majesty..he lives. But—" They hesitated, daring to glance up at him. "Not here. His soul——was pulled into another vessel, elsewhere.."
For a moment, the room was silent. The gathered nobles, too frightened to speak, held their breath. They had already seen what happened to those who failed him.
"Is that so?"
With a flick of his wrist, he let them go.
"Send word to my scouts," he ordered, "Find him. I don’t care whose body he wears now."
His fingers traced the armrest of the throne.
"I will find you.…"
----
The scent of pine and damp earth filled your lungs as you took a deep breath. The forest stretched endlessly before you. Your fingers gripped the worn handle of your hunting knife.
You didn’t remember anything before waking up in this body.
"You're lucky to be alive... Son." the old man had told you when your eyes first opened. His wife had clutched his arm, her wrinkled hands trembling as she stared at you in disbelief.
"We thought we'd lost you"
They had told you about your last hunt, where you were gravely injured, where even the village healer had doubted you would survive.
You looked into the polished steel of your hunting dagger that night, searching for familiarity in the reflection staring back at you.
Still, you had a job to do.
If this was your life, then you would live it. The bow fit comfortably in your grip, the weight of a quiver on your back a second nature. Muscle memory, you told yourself.
Tracking prey was effortless. Another clean kill. Another hunt completed. You wiped the sweat from your brow, exhaling.
------
The weight of the deer slung over your shoulders was nothing compared to the exhaustion settling in your bones. The familiar scent of burning firewood and fresh bread greeted you home, a comforting routine after another successful hunt.
But as you neared your house, something felt off.
You saw a stranger stood at your doorstep, definitely not belong to this village.
Your parents stood before him. The old man’s fingers twitched toward the knife at his belt, his instincts sharp despite his age. The old woman clutched her apron.
Then you noticed it—the object in the stranger’s gloved hand. It glowed faintly as you approached.
The moment the stranger’s gaze locked onto you, his golden eyes widened.
He knelt after realizing that he was staring at you long enough.
"Your majesty."
The glowing object in his hand pulsed faster.
You stared at him, obviously, you didn't recognize him.
"Who… are you?"
"You may not remember me now.. But you will, soon"
Your parents had barely taken a step toward you before the guards moved. One of them grabbed your father’s arm, yanking him back. The old man grunted, stumbling, his weathered face twisting in pain. The other shoved your mother aside, causing her to fall to her knees.
A rush of heat flooded your veins.
With a single step, you closed the distance. Your hand shot out, gripping the nearest guard’s wrist. The crack of bones followed as you twisted, sending the man to the ground with a strangled cry. The second guard barely had time to react before you drove your palm into his chest, sending him staggering back.
The guards scrambled to recover, but before they could so much as lift their weapons, a chilling voice cut through the air.
"Stand down."
The guards froze in place, their faces drained of color.
"You dare lay hands on him in my presence?"
Neither of the guards dared to answer.
"We will have a discussion about discipline."
The guards paled further. You ignored them. Instead, you knelt beside your mother, gently helping her up while your father straightened with a grimace.
"Are you alright?" you asked.
Your mother nodded shakily, gripping your arm. Your father, though clearly furious, held his tongue.
"I will stay here" he announced. He turned to your parents, offering a polite smile. "Your son has lost something dear. I intend to help him retrieve it."
"Fine," you muttered, crossing your arms. "You stay, but don’t cause trouble."
"As you wish, my king."
The forest was quiet in the early morning. You pulled your cloak tighter, feeling the weight of another pair of footsteps trailing behind you.
You didn’t like it.
Every time you glanced over your shoulder, there he was, his eyes always on you. He said nothing, but the way he looked at you made your skin crawl.
You didn’t know who he was or why he called you “king” but he carried himself like a man who had bled for you—and was willing to bleed again.
Still, you tolerated his presence.
If he was telling the truth… if your memories were stolen or lost… maybe this was the only path to getting them back.
The two of you had tracked the deer for hours. Working together was almost disturbingly fluid.
Eventually, you found it grazing in a clearing, its coat dappled gold by morning light.
Mydei raised his weapon. The perfect killing stroke was only a breath away.
But something tugged at your attention.
From the thicket nearby, soft rustling—two small heads peeked out. Fawns.
"Wait!" you said, one hand reaching out to stop him.
Mydei’s movements halted instantly at your word.
He turned to look at you. "It’s wounded. One blow and it’s done."
"It has kids."
You stepped past him, lowering your bow. The mother deer limped slightly, trying to shield the fawns behind her with her body.
"We don’t take parents from children."
"You remember that."
You looked over your shoulder. "What?"
"You used to say that all the time. In war, in law, in hunting… Mercy. You always chose mercy when it mattered."
You frowned. "Sounds like a decent person. Doesn’t feel like me."
"It is you." His voice was hushed. "Even now, with no memories, you’re still.. you."
You looked away, a strange tightness curling in your chest. You didn’t know what you were expecting to find out here—but it wasn’t this.
The deer limped off, its fawns following close behind.
You turned to Mydei. "Let’s keep moving."
He nodded.
The fire crackled softly, its light casting flickering shadows across the trees. Smoke curled upward into the starless sky, carrying with it the scent of pine, ash, and the fish you'd caught earlier. Nothing fancy—just skewered over flame.
You sat on a fallen log, arms resting on your knees, your eyes half-lidded as you watched the flames dance.
Mydei sat across from you. He hadn’t touched the fish. Not yet. As if his appetite depended on yours.
You broke the silence first.
"So," you said, pulling a skewer free from the fire and taking a slow bite, "if I was really this ‘king’ you talk about… what was I like?"
Mydei’s eyes lifted, catching yours through the firelight.
"You were..." he began, "Kind. But strong. People feared disappointing you more than they feared punishment. You never raised your voice unless it was to protect someone."
You snorted softly. "Sounds made up."
He smiled faintly. "I thought so too, the first time I saw you. I thought no man could be so perfect. But… you weren’t perfect. You just chose to be good when it was hardest."
Your hand tightened slightly around the skewer. You stared into the fire, letting the warmth crawl into your skin.
"Tell me another story then." you said after a moment.
Mydei paused. Not to search for one—no, it was clear he had thousands. He just didn’t know which would hurt less to say.
Finally, he said, "There was a day when we were at war. The enemy had taken a village, used the children there as shields. Everyone advised you to wait. To let them starve the enemy out. But you refused. You entered alone."
"You negotiated with them. You carried a child on your back through the burning fields."
You could almost smell the smoke.
You shook it off. "That’s stupid," you muttered. "No one should walk into a trap like that."
"That’s exactly what you said afterward. Right before you scolded me for trying to follow you in."
Then, softly, you asked: "Who were you to me?"
"The one who followed you when no one else dared."
Your heart skipped. You looked back at him.
You said nothing, but for the first time, you didn’t look away.
It had been a few weeks since that first campfire.
You weren’t sure when it happened, but somewhere between tracking game and listening to those half-sorrowful stories of who you used to be, Mydei stopped feeling like a stranger.
He was still strange, no doubt. But beneath all that stillness, there was a fire—one that only ever flickered when he looked at you.
One morning, you gave him your answer.
"I’m not going back."
You expected resistance. But instead, Mydei bowed his head slightly.
"Understood."
And just like that, he was gone.
But the silence did not last.
Back at the palace, Mydei stood before the high court.
"The King’s return has been delayed." he announced calmly, seated on the throne you once ruled. "In the meantime… I will resume rule."
There was a murmur of confusion. But when the new decrees came, the kingdom shook.
Public executions.
"Let them hang until the birds take their eyes. Let the air know what happens to those who betray their king."
Every prisoner sentenced to death. Hung in the square, their heads severed and displayed for all to see. The message was clear:
Loyalty or death.
Mydei watched every execution himself. Not with pleasure—but with a cold, simmering wrath barely concealed beneath his gaze.
It was never about justice.
It was the beginning of cleansing.
A first step to burn away weakness, to purge every trace of betrayal that had led to your death.
You may have said no for now.
But Mydei would not stop.
He would never stop.
------
You had only come to the city to trade.
A bag of dried fish and preserved meat slung across your shoulder, a small bundle of furs under your arm. Just enough to get your parents the winter herbs they needed.
But from the moment you stepped past the outer gates, something felt… wrong.
The streets were quieter than they should’ve been at midday. Families kept their heads down, conversations died quickly, and more than once, you caught the sound of someone crying behind closed doors.
Worse still—guards. Everywhere. Standing in alleyways. Perched on rooftops.
You found an elderly shopkeeper who was kind enough to sell you the herbs at half price after seeing the pelts. When you asked about the strange atmosphere, she looked over her shoulder and whispered:
"Haven’t you heard? The Regent is purging the kingdom. Anyone suspected of betrayal, anyone who opposed him during the king’s assassination—dead. Executed like cattle."
You froze. The king?
"I thought he was—"
"Gone. But now the Regent rules in his name. And it’s worse. Much worse."
You couldn’t shake it. That tightness in your chest.
Somehow, you felt responsible.
You turned to leave the city before the sun dipped, but you didn’t make it far. Not even two streets out before they struck. A blast of magic knocked the breath from your lungs.
Mydei was sitting on the throne when the doors slammed open.
"Three mages, just beyond the east gate. They claim they caught a spy."
Mydei raised a brow, only vaguely interested.
"Let them in."
The guards dragged the mages in first. Behind them, a figure was pulled forward in enchanted chains, a dirty cloth draped over the head.
His eyes narrowed.
"Who is that?" Mydei asked coldly, rising from the throne.
One mage bowed. "A stranger to the capital. He was wandering near the restricted border. We suspect he may be—"
"Uncover him."
The mage complied, grabbing the cloth and yanking it away.
Time seemed to stop.
Your face.
Bruised. Cut. Blood on your temple. Still breathing, but barely.
Mydei slowly walked down from where he is. The blade was already in his hand before anyone noticed it had left its sheath, and then, the mage’s head rolled to the marble floor, eyes still wide in shock.
The court gasped in unison.
Mydei turned to the second. "You laid a hand on him?"
The last two mages fell to their knees instantly, screaming for mercy.
Then silence. All of them are dead.
Only your breathing remained.
"Bring a physician. Now! The best one. Touch him wrong and I’ll make your family watch as I peel you apart."
----
You awoke with a soft breath.
The scent of polished wood and roses lingered in the air.
You sat up slowly.
Someone helped you change your clothes.
And then the ache started.
Flashes behind your eyes.
A throne. Blood.
But then it was gone—faded like breath on glass.
The door creaked open. And he stepped in.
"Where are my parents?"
"They’re safe. I’ve arranged for a physician to stay with them full-time and have stationed guards discreetly."
A quiet sigh left your lips.
"...Thank you" you murmured, sinking back slightly into the soft bed.
Mydei walked closer, but kept his distance.
"I knew you’d ask about them first."
You looked down at your hands, flexing them slowly.
"...Did I live here?"
"Yes."
You had just started breathing normally again.
But then, the door opened once more.
A robed figure entered—A mage. You hated how you kept encountering them.
“What’s going on?”
The mage remained silent.
Instead, Mydei’s hand moved and pinned you by the shoulder. Not hurting you, but holding you still.
“What are you doing—?”
“They’re here to help you.”
“I don’t underst—”
“You will.”
The mage lifted both hands.
A searing light bloomed in the air between you. You struggled, but Mydei didn’t let you move—his grip grew firmer as the light bore down on you.
“Stop—Mydei, wait! I don’t—”
The spell pierced into your mind like a thousand glass needles.
And then— everything came crashing back.
You saw it all.
Your heart seized in your chest.
And you collapsed.
When you awoke, the pain was gone.
You remembered your own name. Everything that made you you.
And Mydei—he was already there, sitting beside your bed with his head lowered, still as a statue, fingers laced in front of his lips as if in silent prayer.
He looked up the second you stirred.
“You’re…”
You opened your mouth, “Mydei…”
And then he wrapped his arms around you tightly, “You’re back!”
He buried his face in your shoulder, shoulders shaking with silent relief.
-----
Mydei had always walked behind you.
For as long as he could remember, he had never needed anything more than the feeling of your voice giving him orders. That clarity, that purpose, was his reason to live.
Now that you stood once again at the top of the world—he had everything.
There was nothing to mourn. No more nights haunted by dreams of your blood-soaked body, no more empty corridors echoing with your absence.
You had returned. And he was whole.
Rumors had spread like wildfire of the lost king reborn. Nobles who once dared to plot found their heads lining the city gates.
Under your banner, armies surged. You took back what was once yours. And then you reached further. Lands that had turned arrogant in your absence were conquered.
Not all days were bloodshed.
Sometimes, when the mood struck, you would make your way to the royal training court.
Your strikes were heavier now—your absence had dulled the sharpness of your stance. But you were no novice. Mydei, however, never struck you like a teacher. He met you as an equal.
“You're still not holding back.”
“I never will” he’d say simply, offering his hand to pull you up.
In the moments between wars and sparring, Mydei would kneel beside your throne without being summoned. He didn’t need permission.
You never had to ask if he would die for you.
He already had.
Again and again.
As long as you wore that crown, as long as you ruled the world—you would never walk alone.
The palace slept beneath a blanket of stars. Guards stood silent along the halls. Outside, the wind stirred faintly through the courtyard trees, but within your chamber, all was still.
You lay in bed, chest rising and falling with deep, even breaths.
And Mydei never left his place beside you. His armor was gone, but his sword still rested within reach. Just in case.
But as the hours stretched on and your breathing softened, Mydei moved. He approached your bed and lingered by the edge for a long moment.
“You’re here…”
His hand brushed yours—fingers wrapping around your larger palm, holding it in both of his like something fragile and precious. His thumb traced along your knuckles, memorizing the lines, the warmth, the proof of your existence.
He knelt.
And with a slow, aching breath, he leaned forward and kissed your forehead.
When he finally pulled away, he stayed seated beside you on the floor, hand still cradling yours in silence.
The sun had just begun to creep over the horizon, casting a soft golden glow into your chambers. You blinked, rubbed your eyes, and pushed the silk covers aside as you sat up with a yawn.
And then you swung your legs over the side of the bed— and tripped.
“Wha—?”
Your foot caught on something solid, warm, and very much not the floor. With a surprised grunt, you crashed down, dragging the blanket with you as the world tilted— And landed right on top of someone.
“Mydei?”
“Good morning, Your Majesty.”
He had clearly fallen asleep beside your bed, collapsed from fatigue without meaning to. But now you were straddling him, tangled in covers, your hair a mess and arms trapped at his sides.
You scrambled up in embarrassment, muttering an apology, trying to disentangle yourself—
Only for your foot to snag on the blanket again.
Smack.
You crashed forward, and this time, your forehead slammed right into Mydei’s mouth.
“—!”
He let out a faint grunt, and you winced at the sharp sting of pain.
You quickly pulled back, horrified to see blood already gathering at the corner of his lower lip.
“Damn it—! Stay there.” You grabbed the nearest cloth, panicked but trying to stay composed. “I didn’t mean to—I wasn’t even—! Ugh, this is my fault.”
“It’s fine.”
You ignored that, grabbing the small case of ointments near the bedside and unscrewing the cap. With careful fingers, you reached toward his face.
“Don’t move.”
You dabbed the balm gently over the split lip, and he held still beneath your touch.
“Done. Now get up, Mydei.”
-----
The village was quiet this morning, nestled deep in the rural lands reclaimed under your banner. You were there to ensure their peace.
You and Mydei rode at the front, flanked by a handful of guards. The villagers bowed with hushed reverence as you passed, offering fresh bread and small gifts of thanks. But you felt strange.
“Something’s wrong...”
A firebolt struck the nearest house
“Protect the villagers!” you ordered instantly, drawing your blade.
The guards leapt into action, shielding children and herding families toward safety. You turned sharply toward the treeline.
Dozens emerged—cloaked figures, former rebels from the lands you’d conquered.
They weren’t after the people.
They were after you.
“Draw them away,” you muttered, stepping beside Mydei. “Toward the ruin tower. We’ll finish this ourselves.”
He nodded without question.
The old tower was long abandoned, overtaken by moss and rot. It stood like a crooked fang on the edge of the cliffs.
The rebels chased, just as planned.
Half of them fell to your swords, the rest driven to desperation.
From the shadows of the top chamber, hidden figures lunged—ambushers lying in wait. You pivoted too late, barely fending off a strike aimed at your neck.
In the chaos, someone tackled you from behind.
And you were falling.
The wind howled past your ears as the edge of the tower vanished beneath you—until his hand caught your wrist.
“Your majesty!”
The scene unfolds in slow motion, the world reduced to crumbling stone, blood, and the weight of a choice neither of you wanted to make.
Mydei’s grip on your wrist is iron, his other hand braced against broken masonry, muscles straining to hold you both aloft. And you see it. The moment he realizes: This won’t work. The structure shudders. The math is simple. One life or none.
So you act.
The knife is in your hand before either of you can protest. You drive it into his palm and his fingers jerk open in reflex. His scream is raw, your name half curse, half plea, but you’re already falling, the wind howling in your ears as the tower collapses behind you.
You land hard. Alive. That's what matters.
But Mydei doesn’t know that.
By the time you stagger upright, wiping blood from your lip, the sky is raining something worse than rubble.
He jumped.
Because he thought you were gone, and the universe without you wasn’t worth staying in.
Then your body moves. You lunge, arms outstretched, and catch him midair with a grunt of impact, boots skidding in the dirt. His weight nearly knocks you over, but you hold on.
"You— I mean..."
You grin, all teeth and no remorse. "Miss me?"
He chokes out something between a laugh and a sob. You pretend not to notice the wetness on your collar.
The grand hall of the palace is alive with light and laughter, the air thick with the scent of roasted meats and spiced wine.
You sit upon the throne, draped in royal finery, a goblet of wine dangling carelessly from your fingers. The feast is in full swing—musicians play lively tunes, nobles toast to your safe return, and the long tables groan under the weight of the banquet. But your gaze keeps drifting to him.
Mydei hasn’t touched his wine.
You smirk into your cup.
Then, with a lazy wave of your hand, you silence the musicians.
"Today," you announce, "we celebrate not just my safe return, but the loyalty of the man who would have followed me into death itself."
You raise your goblet toward him. "Sir Mydei—step forward."
For a moment, he hesitates. Then, he approaches the throne and kneels, head bowed.
You lean forward, resting your chin on your free hand. "Tell me," you murmur, just loud enough for him to hear, "was it duty that made you jump after me? Or something far more foolish?"
"You know what it was"
You hum, amused. Then, in one smooth motion, you rise from the throne and pull him up by his uninjured hand. The court gasps as you press your own goblet into his grip.
"Then drink with me," you command, grinning. "And stop glaring like I’m already dead."
His fingers tighten around the cup. For a heartbeat, you think he might throw it in your face.
Instead, he drains it in one defiant swallow.
The nobles erupt into cheers. You laugh, clapping him on the shoulder.
"Good job, Mydei."
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gaypirate420 · 3 months ago
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Is it you? Have my prayers been answered?// Jayvik.
Au!Jayvik x gn!reader.
Summary: You're always my husband and I've been waiting.
A/N: I need stories with Old Man Viktor...
Angst/Fluff.
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"Do you think he made it?" Viktor murmurs at the blank statue in front of him, his fingernails scratching his walking stick. The old man sighs, letting the stick fall to the ground, without much thinking he crawled in between those open arms, now accessible because of the hammer that had been burrowed by the last Jayce.
"I feel it here..." The zaunite whispers, pressing two fingers on the hollow chest of the statue. Of Jayce.
"...that maybe this time. Maybe once. It finally worked." He finished his sentence, his fingers traveling down to the necklace dangling from the hollow neck of his partner. His thumb caresses the jewels on it, cleaning off the arcane-like nature that grew around it, polishing back to their crystal glow.
"Voila! Now you carry me and Vik around with you all the time!" The sound of your voice echoes through his head, the image of you giving the necklace to Jayce, it sounds so vivid yet like a distant dream, but the soft laughter melts into a gut wrenching scream.
"Viktor!" He can see you again, vanishing in front of him as you desperately try to pull him away from the Hexcore before your body succumbs to its power and you vanish away.
Viktor shakes his head, taking a deep breath and nuzzling his face on the shoulder of the statue, trying to seek the warmth he once knew, but it's only a cold rock.
"I'm sorry, my love." The old man murmurs with a strained voice, a stray tear falling down his wrinkled face. He closes his eyes.
There's not much left for him, only time.
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Viktor can feel something is different as he fell into a deep sleep. Something warm crept within him, and the night air hit his body, but he was so tired.
His multicolored eyes open, an unusual bright sunlight hits his face, covering his eyes with one hand, immediately he notices the lack of stone around him, he's laying down on a soft bedding of grass and flowers.
Viktor gives his all to stand up. The air feels so clean, the sun is warm, the flowers are fresh, bright and natural, there's no trace of the arcane patter in them, a white butterfly flies down to one of the flowers, the wings look normal, beautiful.
Is he dead? Is this heaven? No, with what he's done he's not getting a glimpse of the pearly gates.
His eyes scan the land, finding a small cottage meters away at the bottom of the mountain next to the river, smoke coming from the chimney.
As he walks a small frown comes creeping into his face, he thought he'd mastered time travel decades ago, what's this foolery of traveling while he slept? Unacceptable.
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The old mage makes it down to the cottage, the sweet smell of home made bread hitting him, he hasn't felt hungry in a long time, but now he's suddenly starving. He follows the stone path to the door, some bunnies hopping around the garden.
His eyes stare at the door for a moment, it's adorned with a handpainted pattern, he knocks on the door. The wind chimes make a soft melody. Where is he? When is he?
The door opens slowly.
You were uncertain to open the door, you haven't seen anyone here, who could be knocking? You peeped your eyes on the small opening. But you gasp and quickly open it fully.
"Vikus..." You whispered, almost like a prayer. He was there, grey streaks on his hair and wrinkles around his face. The greying beard. The tired eyes, the dark circles under there. The soft remains of the hexcorized skin.
Viktor stares at you, your eyes as beautiful as he remembered, you also had some greying hairs of your own, the wrinkles around your mouth making him remember how much you laughed.
"Moje lásko..." He whispers back, his voice breaking, your hand reaches out a bit hesitantly but you cup his cheek. He gasps, it's been so long since anyone touched him.
And he realizes, you're warm, you're soft. You're real. And you realize the same about him. You sob but then burst into an excited laughter.
"it's you!" You shout, wrapping your arms around his slender frame, Viktor almost stumbles back, he gasps softly but wraps his arms around your waist, nuzzling his face into your hair, breathing in your scent.
"it's you! It's really you!" You chuckled between tears, you cupped his face and pres an ungodly amount of kisses on his cheek. The old man feels dizzy from the sudden affection, the touch, but he doesn't pull you away, he doesn't want to be apart from you ever again. You locked your lips with his, a soft and slow kiss, he closed his eyes, feeling you, savoring you before you pulled away.
And when he thought this couldn't get any better.
"Jayce!" You shout, again that soft laughter between sobs.
"Jayce, darling, come downstairs!" You tugged Viktor inside the cottage, wrapping your hand around his bandaged arm, he doesn't resist you, just staring at you like a fawn.
His multicolored eyes widen as the sound of heavy steps make their way downstairs.
Jayce looks confused, a bit worried about your sudden call. But he freezes, his hazel eyes widen.
"Viktor." He whispers before running and wrapping his arms around Viktor's waist. Pulling him up into his arms. Oh it's warm, Jayce's big arms are warm and he can hear the pulse on his chest, it's not rock, it's not hollow.
"Jayce." He whines, holding tight on his shirt. The last thing he remembered with Jayce was...
"I'm so sorry...I hurt you, both of you-" He sobs against his shoulder, Jayce hushes him quickly, his fingers running down the gray strands of hair, his big hand cups his face, kissing him deeply.
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"Is the water alright?" Jayce asked Viktor as he poured some water down his hair. The skinnier man nodded. It's nighttime now, the three of you stayed in the living room for quite a while, asking about Viktor's wellbeing, but mostly hugging each other and letting out all those years worth of tears.
Viktor looks up at Jayce as he joins him in the bathtub, for a small cottage you and Jayce figure out to have a bathtub big enough for three people and it made his chest feel weird.
You two thought of him, even when he wasn't there. You two were hoping for him to come back, to join you.
The old mage feels your hands running through his hair, starting to massage softly the shampoo into his scalp.
Jayce smiles as you admire Viktor's greying hair. Viktor's eyes fall on the taller man. Now he can admire the signs of age on him too. He allows himself to relax for the first time, a small smile creeping on his tired face. You wash the shampoo away and press a kiss on his shoulder, Jayce leans closer and presses one on between his eyebrows.
"We're real. You're not dreaming, V." Jayce murmurs against his skin, you nodded along and pres a trail of kisses up to his jaw, Viktor basked in the affection, gasping softly.
"We're together again." You whispered, your voice so closely made Viktor shiver, he forgot how responsive he was to you and Jayce's touch.
"... together." He murmurs quietly.
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A/N: old times be upon ye! I hope y'all like this, I've been very busy with school but I had to write this down, I've been drafting some requests too, so don't feel like I'm ignoring y'all!!! (Divider) (Divider)
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sorryimananti-romantic · 2 years ago
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Hearts Awakened, Live Alive
demon!mingi x human!reader
fantasy au (inspired by howl's moving castle)
word count: ~26k
genres: fluff, really angsty, suggestive, mention of hostage situation, violence warnings, whiplash warning lol
synopsis: you finally run away from the clutches of your stepmother and encounter mingi, infamously known as 'the child of shadows'. you join his gang of three- the high healer wooyoung and the white flame seonghwa and start living with them. you find out mingi is cursed to share a body with the shadow demon that goes by the name erebos and start falling for it and mingi eventually, though tragic consequences await you as you find out more about the demon's curse.
manager-nim: @eightmakesonebraincell (we were writing diff fics side by side on docs and messed up the tenses so bad)
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The last thing you remembered as you woke up after what had to be another fainting spell was that your wrists had been tied together and you were locked in the tower of your house– but as you looked around and found nothing but the woods and greens of the forests, you started to feel dread creep up your chest and bubble out in the form of a short sob.
You spent only a few seconds trying to recall how you got here- you had run away from home and this time, you had succeeded, but now you needed to get as far away from the town as possible. You got up, not bothering to brush the leaves and dirt off your cloak and instead tried to figure out what direction you had been aiming for- the setting sun. Thankfully, it wasn’t dark just yet so you followed the rays of the sun and started running a little more carefully this time, head still dizzy from the overwhelmingness of the situation.
Sieun’s plan was perfect. She was one of the servants back at the castle house, a place that had once been your home when your father was still alive- under the reign of your stepmother, though, everything had gone to hell. She was the only one who had dared to help you escape and succeeded. You did not want to think about what had happened to those who failed.
You licked your dry lips and wondered if the sound of water you could hear was actually a stream or just a bait- afterall, this was a town of mages. It might be a trick to lure people- but…
There was someone else in your town now, someone feared by mages and humans alike. ‘The Child of Shadows’, they called him among his many other names. You had only heard rumours about him and you weren’t sure if they were true. What you did know was that as a mere human, you had to avoid him at absolutely all costs. You’d had enough of living in the shadows already.
The sun was starting to set so you decided to find shelter and followed the sound of the stream. The running water was cool to touch and you washed your face and hands before drinking it. You searched in the pockets of your cloak, finding a piece of bread and devouring it in a few bites, almost choking on it- you felt a sudden sense of dread when you realised that something about this whole situation was off-
Silence. It was awfully silent- you didn’t realise when the birds stopped chirping and the bugs stopped buzzing- not even the sound of a leaf in the air. The water and the unsteady beats of your heart were the only thing you could hear. You gulped, trying to recall when exactly the forest fell silent when you heard the sounds of leaves rustling behind you. You whipped your head around and pulled the knife out of your sleeve, pointing it at-
Not one, but a bunch of soldiers. You immediately put your knife back.
“Are you lost, miss?” One of them asked, a middle aged man with a unique moustache. “You look pale.”
“No, I… I’m travelling so I just stopped to eat-”
“Travelling? Alone?” Another soldier said, not buying your story. “Miss, you know the protocols, right? We would need to see your identification.”
This was it. 
Without any identification, travelling alone? They were going to put you behind bars. That would be better than going back to the dungeons of your house, you thought, as the little spark of hope you had been harbouring ever since you escaped started to dim-
“She’s not alone,” a deep, raspy voice boomed and for a moment you froze, wondering if it had reverberated inside you. You found yourself unable to turn, instead letting the source of the voice come in your vision.
Nothing about him screamed normal, from his ragged appearance to his unmistakable dark aura, and even the soldiers took a step back. You remained frozen as he passed you a glance- such sharp eyes- and dug something from his bag, showing it to the soldiers. They looked from the card to you and back, straightening, and as if a spell had been casted over them, they bowed and turned back to join their squad.
The man who had just saved you turned and you scanned him again- hair swept back in black and blue spikes adding more sharpness to his pointy features, the dark cloak on his broad body not helping with the air he exuded-
“Who are you?” You managed to ask, taking a step back and finally understanding why the soldiers had too.
He passed an awkward smile and held his bag close. “Just a passerby.”
“What did you show to the soldiers? And where did you come from?”
“So many questions for someone who’s travelling alone, in this state,” he glanced at your rags hidden under your cloak before stepping towards you and you reflexively pointed your knife at him, making him scoff in amusement. “I’m sorry but this knife won’t do much to me,” he waved a hand and the knife turned to ashes and you gaped at it.
“You’re a mage…” your heart sank to your feet- you really were done for this time. He shrugged and started down on the path, turning to you after a few steps.
“Aren’t you gonna follow me?”
You hated how his voice made you obey instantly- more out of curiosity than fear, which was new considering the stories you’d heard about mages. Your own experience with mages was not the best either. You cleared your throat, falling just a step behind him and matching his pace from there. “Where are we going?”
“Where are you going? You seemed to have run away,” he said casually. You wondered if he often encountered runaways on the road.
“I just need to get as far away from this town as possible,” you almost shivered and he nodded.
“I’m travelling anyway. I don’t mind if you join- as long as you don’t make too much noise.”
“I can be as silent as a pin,” you told him and he glanced at you in amusement. 
“Aren’t you scared of travelling with a stranger?” You ignored that, wondering what you would do if he tried something with you. However, his shoulders shook from laughter and he said, “Relax. I’m not alone either- I have company.”
You should have known that by company he meant more mages, and you were cursing internally at the thought of being surrounded by mages, because what if someone decided to take advantage of the fact that you were a mere human? Your stepmother had, even when she was human herself- and all she wanted was for you to hand over your assets to her. You wouldn’t put it past this bunch to not do the same.
What you didn’t expect was how incredibly normal they seemed. Their appearance? Not so much, but the way they approached the mage who accompanied you? You frowned as you watched their comfortable interaction- you couldn’t sense anything from them that would give you a hint of who they were, but you wondered if you were the only one who felt that dark, crushing aura of your companion. 
“And who’s our new guest?” The man with white hair approached with a gentle smile though he passed a sceptical glance at your companion. “Another one, Mingi? Already?” 
“What do you mean, already, it’s been a few decades. Don’t scare her off,” the shorter one tsk-ed at him and approached you with the warmest smile. “I’m Jung Wooyoung- you can call me Wooyoung. You might know me as the High Healer-”
“Wooyoung-”
“The High Healer?” You gasped.
Wooyoung folded his arms. “Yes?”
You looked at the other two in disbelief but when they didn’t react, you shook your head, trying to make sense of it. “You’re the High Healer.”
“I am,” Wooyoung’s voice was low and contained a hint of worry. “What’s the matter?”
You had been out to find him.
“Nothing, just-” you looked at the man who had accompanied you. “Who are you then?”
“Song Mingi,” he told you and you raised a brow, expecting more but he didn’t give in. You looked at the white-haired man.
“Park Seonghwa. The White Flame,” he muttered and you nodded- you had heard of him, alright. The Fallen Angel. You were wondering if that really was the case or if it was just a title he earned because he looked like one. “Did you lose your way while travelling?”
“I ran away,” you straightened- might as well pretend not to be a coward than quivering in their company. The healer hooted at that and you were once again surprised by the man’s behaviour- nothing like your father had told you. “You’re not how I imagined you to be.”
“Ah, I get that a lot,” he winked, “Everyone imagines a boring old balding man with a long beard, don’t they?”
“I mean,” you shrugged. “You are supposed to be old, aren’t you?”
“I’m not even that old,” he waved his hand dismissively. “They’ve got multiple centuries over me- they’re older.”
“Centuries?” You gaped at Mingi- you weren’t surprised about the White Flame- he was as old as time itself, and you wondered if part of his magic was exuding a calm air so you wouldn’t panic in his presence. Because nothing about the White Flame shook you to the core like Mingi’s presence did. 
“That’s enough,” Mingi exhaled. “Let’s go home.”
You followed the three, wondering what was up with this odd bunch- the White Flame and the High Healer living in the same place didn’t make sense at all. So who was this Song Mingi? You tried recalling anything that rung a bell, but-
You paused when the three abruptly stopped and watched Mingi wave a hand in the air, and what you saw next took your breath away- it was as if a layer of fog had been lifted and you could suddenly see-
“That’s your home?”
Ruins was what it was. A house falling apart on itself. It was as if someone had gathered planks of wood and nailed them wherever they could- there were windows, yes, but everything was absolutely crooked.
Mingi turned slowly to glare at you, once again making you gulp. Wooyoung butted in between the two of you. “The inside is not that bad, I promise.”
Mingi and Seonghwa ignored the two of you, talking in hushed voices as they started to go inside. You stood frozen in place, feeling an odd sense of danger and calm battling for dominance within you. Wooyoung nudged you along but when you stopped again, he asked, “Do you not want to come inside?”
“Should I?” You locked eyes with him. “I’ve heard you’re a good person, High Healer.”
“I’ve heard that too,” he said with a smug smile.
“People- humans trust you. You help them, right?” When he nodded, you continued. “Tell me then, would I regret joining the three of you? Even if it’s for just one night?”
“If it’s for one night? Not really. You could be on your way tomorrow. But if you choose to stay,” Wooyoung pursed his lips. “I can’t guarantee you won’t regret it.”
“Well, at least you’re candid about it,” you started walking and Wooyoung grinned. “Just know I wouldn’t be walking towards that ‘house’ right now if it weren’t for you.”
“You seem to know me,” Wooyoung’s eyes twinkled. “Have we met?”
You simply smiled- he wouldn’t know you. This was your first time meeting him as well, however, your father was acquainted with him. You decided not to mention it to him right now.
The house did look better inside, you had to agree- it was a mess, still, but it did look like people were actually living in it. Seonghwa was in the kitchen and you tried to let the image of the White Flame doing dishes sink in. Wooyoung was laughing loudly at your expressions and you awkwardly glanced around, taking off your cloak and sitting by the fireplace. 
“I always get such a kick out of whenever someone sees Seonghwa in the kitchen,” Wooyoung wiped his eyes, handing you a glass of what looked like orange juice which you gladly accepted. “Who would have thought the White Flame was obsessed with keeping his kitchen clean, right?”
“I don’t know where all of you got the impression that I would be doing something else,” Seonghwa muttered. “I have a house to manage and two kids to take care of.”
“Two children?” You frowned and Wooyoung guiltily raised his hand, you realised he was referring to Wooyoung and Mingi as the two kids. You looked at Wooyoung, “Well, where are the others?”
“What others?”
“You said you get a kick out of people watching Seonghwa in the kitchen. Do you often have visitors or are there others here?”
When Seonghwa and Wooyoung met eyes and shared a look, you knew whatever he’d tell you would be a lie so you decided to ask something else. “What happens to those who decide to stay with you for longer than a day?”
“You’re very sceptical of us,” Seonghwa tossed the washcloth in the sink and folded his arms as he leaned against the counter to almost glare at you. “If you’re going to keep asking questions when we’ve given you shelter, you might as well leave at the crack of dawn.”
And, there it was. Your suspicions that Seonghwa was making a conscious effort to emanate a calm air were confirmed when you felt a shift in the air and something heavy started settling in your heart, making your throat feel tight. Wooyoung called Seonghwa’s name in warning.
“Let’s be patient with a curious guest, we don’t often get that,” he waved dismissively and Seonghwa went back to fiddling with the utensils. You didn’t realise how hard you were clutching the glass until Wooyoung patted your back. “Don’t mind him. He’s so old he gets cranky sometimes. Would you like to take a tour of the mansion?”
“Mansion?” You almost laughed and he grinned.
“What better name to call this beauty?” He looked around and as if on cue, a pipe at the far end of the room burst, spraying water and startling all of you. Seonghwa muttered a curse under his breath before he went to examine it and you turned to the healer in amusement.
“Sure,” you smiled. “I would like a tour.”
—--------------------
The thing about mages was that they did not care for humans. They really, really didn’t- they were not humans. They would not understand the simple human struggles, such as why they always think selfishly- humans had a shorter lifespan after all, unlike most mages. Mages also didn’t quite understand that some humans had more things to worry about than death- there were more important things.
Such as finally being able to live.
You were sitting in front of the fireplace in the middle of the night, not quite sleepy. You reckoned it was because you still hadn’t made a decision- did you want to leave? What would you do if you left? How far could you make it travelling on your own, really? Sooner or later, someone was going to take advantage of you and you would meet a fate worse than death- something similar to what your life had been before you finally ran away from home.
And if you decided to stick with these mages… 
“What are you doing here?” 
You turned to the source of voice, identifying his presence first. Mingi. Why did his voice feel different this time? You straightened your dress and posture, not feeling a need to answer, wondering if it was the lack of sleep that was making you hear things-
“I asked you something.”
You frowned as you looked at him again- yes, he was Mingi, but why did he sound… different? 
“Just… thinking.”
“About?”
“I thought you’d know that- it is you all who gave me the ultimatum,” you narrowed your eyes as you scanned him- he was wearing a cloak. Was he going out at this hour of the night? 
“Ah, did we?” He suddenly sounded… cockier. You watched him step closer and pick something from the mantel and bury it in his pockets before you could see it. When he turned, you noticed the colour of his eyes now that the fire illuminated half of his face-
His eyes were almost glowing.
“Say, would you like some fresh air?” He suggested and you all but gaped at his sudden change of demeanour. 
“Why would I go out to get some fresh air with someone I don’t even know at this hour of the night?”
“Well, you are staying in a house with three strangers who just happen to be mages, aren’t you?” He shifted his weight to one leg. “I told them not to let more of you humans in, but they always insist it’s for ‘the better’.”
“Why?” You dared to ask.
“Why would mages welcome human company, right?” Mingi scoffed. “Think about that before you go to sleep tonight, little bird.”
Even though your heart sank, you dared to ask, “Would you mind if I stayed?”
His almost devilish smirk made you wish you had never asked that. He stepped closer, slowly, until he was right in front of you and you had to crane your neck to meet his eyes. You let him trace the side of your face, feeling in your bones first that this wasn’t the person you had met in the woods, not the one with the warm smile who had saved you, not the one who had been so hesitant to meet your eyes.
This wasn’t Song Mingi.
“Who are you?” You almost whispered and his eyes twinkled.
“I’m the shadows that you fear, little bird,” his voice sounded ancient, spreading like the very shadows he mentioned around you. He patted your cheek once, almost condescendingly, before disappearing and you wondered just what you were getting into. “And you should fly away when you still have the chance.”
You, of course, decided to stay. Simply out of spite.
You have always been like this. When your father died, you were far too young to exercise your authority and influence as the inheritor of the noble title and all of his assets, and you let your stepmother take advantage of you as you succumbed to grief. But as the grief started becoming something like background and you finally realised how you were trapped, you decided you would never let anyone get the better of you again.
Your stepmother had treated you like an inconvenience, and as you started rebelling, it took the shape of an ugly war. You, however, did not have anyone who had your back. Your stepmother had influence around town and she used that, hired mages to put wards around her house to keep you from leaving. You always asked her why she wouldn’t simply let you go. Perhaps, she was afraid she would lose. But it got to the point that you wondered if she was paranoid- especially when she started using numbing potions on you, locking you in a room in the tower. 
Now that you hadn’t had that potion in two days, it was as if you were finally regaining your senses. The world was clearer and you felt awake for once. You owed it all to Sieun who had gained your stepmother’s trust, only to pretend to give you those numbing potions and a chance to run away. You could do nothing but pray she wasn’t locked in that tower like you, that she didn’t meet a fate worse than you did.
So maybe, it was spite. Maybe you simply didn’t want to be told what to do anymore that you decided to stick with this odd group of mages and see where it took you- after all, you had nowhere to go.
But it was also slightly because you knew you could trust the healer because your father had told you so, and because you were so intrigued about who this Song Mingi was. He had to be someone you had heard about- he felt too powerful to be a simple mage. He was too old to be a simple mage. The White Flame you had heard enough tales about. But…
A knock sounded on your door and you, who had been in the middle of making the bed, cleared your throat. The door opened and a mess of white hair greeted you, eyes curious. 
“I’m surprised you didn’t run away in the night,” Seonghwa commented and you shrugged. “Slept well?”
“Not really, but that’s the nerves,” you finished straightening the duvet, glancing around. “And might also be the abundance of spiders in your ‘beautiful mansion’.”
“Ah, I swear I cleaned this room two days ago but the spiders keep coming,” he stood awkwardly in the doorway and you had to stop and stare at him- was he actually taking you seriously? “So you decided to stay?”
“For now,” you nodded slowly. “If you’re fine with it?”
“Oh, I don’t care,” Seonghwa admitted. “Wooyoung would love to talk to someone else other than the two of us too.”
“And… Mingi?”
Seonghwa raised a brow and you felt a shift in the air that almost made you bend. You frowned in confusion but Seonghwa was eyeing you knowingly. “Did you talk to him in private or something?”
“In the middle of the night…” you told him. “He basically told me to go away.”
“Ah. But you’re staying?”
“Yes,” you folded your arms. “That’s not a problem, is it?”
“Not at all,” he said with a smile that didn’t quite meet his eyes. “But a word of advice for you- stay in your own room during the night. You don’t want to see things that you won’t like.”
You narrowed your eyes at him. “That’s for me to decide, but thank you.”
Seonghwa shook his head in mild amusement. “I guess the potion is wearing off.”
“You can tell?” You wowed. Of course he could. He was a mage. 
“You’re not the same person who almost cowered at our feet,” he tilted his head up a fraction, making you wonder if he was looking down at you- in every sense possible. “I like you better this way, but now I know what to do if you become too much-”
“You would not-”
Seonghwa paused- you sounded like a wounded animal but there was a hint of threat in there which made him intrigued despite himself. Somehow, he could relate to you in that moment, share the sense of once being trapped by your own people even though a lifetime had passed for him. 
“I would not,” he assured you, this time without a smile. “Join us for breakfast?”
You exhaled somewhat in relief and followed him downstairs, surprised to see everyone on the table. You wondered if ‘breakfast’ was a regular thing here. You could not remember the last time you sat at a table to eat- you were too used to seating yourself in corners. 
And you could not move when Seonghwa pushed out a chair for you. When he cleared his throat, you finally came back to your senses and sat, studying the others. Wooyoung waved at you and Mingi seemed to be too interested in his almost finished plate.
“Help yourself,” Wooyoung pushed a plate of eggs towards you. “I’m a good cook.”
“I’m sure you are…” you felt the need to take a nibble first, see if you could detect the faint scent of lavender in it which was a key ingredient for any numbing potion- however, you knew that the White Flame could probably read your thoughts from your body language alone. He was called the ‘Seer of the Hearts’ for a reason. So you stomped on your hesitation and took a bite-
Of the most heavenly eggs you could have ever tasted.
“There’s no way you did not mix magic in that,” you muttered to yourself, mostly, but Wooyoung caught that.
“I do not mix magic with my daily routine, I’m a healer,” Wooyoung laughed. “I’m glad you think it’s good. People here don’t really appreciate good food and the effort behind it, you know?”
You glanced at Mingi who sported a faint smile. “Tastes normal enough to me.”
You knew they were teasing each other- bickering back and forth so naturally in an argument about who was the best cook in the house. You couldn’t help but wonder if that is how they usually were, and Mingi-
He sounded like the same person you had met in the woods. Not the one who talked to you last night. No hint of that cockiness nor a sharp glint in the eyes. He sounded warm.
“Well,” Mingi, who had just finished eating, spoke out loud, seemingly addressing you and you straightened, breaking out of your trance. “Have you decided if you want to stay?”
“So the decision is in my hands?” You asked with a raise of brow, not able to hold yourself back. Seonghwa looked at you in warning but you ignored that. “I thought you decided for me last night.”
And then something flashed in his eyes making you wonder if you were imagining it. “Sorry if it seemed that way.”
Again, you were confused. “I think I’ll stay after all, and see what exactly are those shadows that I should fear.”
That made Mingi drop his fists on the table as he almost glared at you.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Mingi-”
“No,” Mingi interrupted Wooyoung. “If she’s staying, she should know who I am. She should know to stay away from me- and she shouldn’t be here for much longer. There’s only so much I can do about this.”
You wiped your hands as you processed what he said- you had asked him who he was last night.
“Take it slow,” Seonghwa reminded him softly. “We do not make our guests feel unwelcome, Mingi, you know that.” 
Mingi slumped back in his seat then, muttering an apology and you did the same, making the High Healer stifle his smile. “Kids, both of you. You should know that Mingi is publicly called ‘The Child of Shadows’ though, before you decide to stay. We don’t want you to think that we tricked you into staying or something.”
Seonghwa groaned loudly but you couldn’t hear that, because-
The Child of Shadows. 
You had heard enough tales about him. The mage who could make you think you were blind in broad daylight. The mage who drove the best insane, the one who made you face years worth of nightmares in a second. The Cursed, the Prophesied, they also called him, though you had heard quite a bit of variations of that one. Cursed why? Prophesied to do what? The question remained even after centuries-
Centuries over you, these three mages had. You had never felt smaller in your life before, so insignificant, so-
When Seonghwa called your name, that’s when you broke out of your trance. You found yourself out of breath and locked eyes with Mingi again. 
I’m the shadows that you fear, little bird. And you should fly away when you still have the chance.
His words from last night rang in your head and you sighed internally. It was a miracle you were alive right now, but then you supposed if you didn’t encounter them, you would have been dead anyway. So you cleared your throat, reeling yourself back in. “I’m here.”
“I understand that you are scared,” Seonghwa smiled. “He doesn’t have the best reputation, does he?”
“None of you have, except The High Healer,” you looked at Wooyoung who smiled proudly. “I just don’t know what to believe. I know your magic is keeping me calm- part of it anyway,” you admitted to Seonghwa who seemed genuinely surprised that you knew. “But I don’t know what to expect.”
Seonghwa looked at Mingi who kept his face void of any emotions. “The Child of Shadows… There's a very simple reason he is called that. And he’s not as bad as they made him to be- I can vouch for that.”
“I’d like to believe that,” you almost whispered and Mingi met your eyes, something like understanding passing between you two- you had no idea what exactly you understood of Mingi now, but somehow, you weren’t sour about the events of last night anymore. “Mages must struggle with their own magic too, as humans struggle with… being human.”
Seonghwa smiled knowingly at Mingi who awkwardly stood up, glancing at the three of you. “I have some business in town so if you need something, let me know now. I’ll be back in the evening and then we will move.”
“Move where?” You asked.
“We’re travellers,” Wooyoung sighed dramatically. “We don’t have a place we can call home.”
“But what about this… mansion?” You asked, making the three chuckle. 
You were in for a surprise. In the evening, after you spent the rest of the day lurking around and watching Seonghwa prepare food and Wooyoung experiment with his potions, Mingi arrived, seeming out of breath, hair all messy as if he had been on the run. Your suspicions were confirmed when he talked with Seonghwa in hushed voices and the two went outside. You glanced at Wooyoung who was observing you already.
“It’s normal. No one really likes them. Me, though? I’m the only reason we get to stay in one place for a while.”
You reckoned it was true- the High Healer was a mage that every human wanted to meet at least once in their lifetime- and not because he was a ‘healer’. His wisdom was for the books, though you had to say you never imagined the High Healer was this cheeky personally. You wondered if he was like this with everyone.
“You still haven’t told me how we’re gonna travel. Don’t you need to pack or something?”
Wooyoung smirked yet again, like he had been doing ever since the morning whenever you inquired about their means or mode of travel. You passed him an annoyed look and the doors burst open, the two looking as calm as they could.
“Fuel the engines, Wooyoung,” Seonghwa ordered. “I’m going to the roof- Mingi will wait until it’s time.”
“Fuel what engines?” Your voice shook and you went for the window to get a look outside, not finding any sort of a transport, much less one with an engine. You turned to see Wooyoung at the fireplace with one hand in the fire and you had to swallow an instinctive scream. Seonghwa had disappeared and you felt a tap on your arm.
“You might want to take a seat,” Mingi motioned to the table. “First time can be scary.”
“I don’t understand,” you confessed. 
“You’ll see,” he placed a hand on your back, urging you to do as he said. Unconvinced, you sat down and braced yourself for the biggest surprise of your life- 
It started with Wooyoung shouting okay and Seonghwa responding. When the utensils on the table started shaking a bit, you wondered if there was an earthquake and almost screamed when you felt the floor rock. You could practically feel the foundations of the house shaking as it rose, finally earning a scream from you which went unnoticed. You spotted Wooyoung who looked amused and you finally got it then.
This house moves.
You had never heard of such a thing in your life. Not even in the stories. Your horror turned into something like surprise and perhaps a little bit of glee as you walked cautiously towards Wooyoung, holding on to whatever was near for support and when he extended his hand, you took it.
“I could have had a heart attack, Wooyoung,” you finally laughed, more in disbelief.
“And that’s why they have a healer here,” his eyes twinkled with amusement and you found him scanning your face. You realised it was your first time laughing in years and your smile fell but you let a hint of it remain. 
“How do you do it?”
Wooyoung explained the mechanics- it was basically running due to Seonghwa. They had figured this mechanism out a few decades ago- Wooyoung, who had a fire affinity, would fuel the house through the fireplace. The house had a soul at this point which was thanks to Seonghwa, and he admitted even he did not know how Seonghwa did it. You realised why he adored this house then, despite its tattered form- and perhaps, it was tattered due to all the travelling they did.
You also learned that without Mingi’s magic the house could not move. The shadows materialised and binded the house in places you could not see and they also worked as tyres. Wooyoung showed you how it looked through the window and you were amazed. You spotted Seonghwa dangling from the edge of the roof, moving his limbs as if he himself was driving the house but when he looked down and waved, you figured it must be for the initial kick. 
“So where’s Mingi?” You finally asked, unable to hold back your curiosity.
“Outside the space in his room, maybe,” Wooyoung considered for a second. “You can go and see him if you like. You don’t have to be scared of him.”
You pursed your lips and when you started to inch away, Wooyoung smiled, motioning at you to go ahead. You started climbing the stairs, heart filled with profound feelings of appreciation for the structure that was doing its best to simply remain and not fall apart. A house built on magic and friendship- on love. You could appreciate that, because you knew that no matter how pretty or magnificent a house could look, it could still be the ugliest place to live in and feel like a prison.
You didn’t knock on his door since it was wide open and you could spot him standing outside with his hands extended towards the front, shadows surrounding him- black, inky fog. You figured he would detect your presence anyway so you just watched, not once feeling fear- strange since the townspeople cried when they heard his name-
Why? What had he done to earn that reputation? You did not understand how the Child of Shadows you knew from the rumours and stories from people around you was the same person who had the warmest gaze at times, who looked almost scared at times- especially when he had come back today.
However, it was not the warm gaze that greeted you when he turned his neck back to look at you. It was the same glowing eyes from last night- the ones that looked like silver stars dipped in shadows. And when his lips curved not in a smile but a smirk, you knew that he was not the same person you had breakfast with today.
Swallowing, you stepped forward as if possessed by those very shadows, as if they were moving your feet in the first place. You stopped by the window- the entrance to the little space outside, when he finally spoke.
“You stayed, little bird.”
You didn’t answer but stood beside him and watched how the magic worked. When you finally spoke, it was to say, “You’re not Mingi.”
“That’s the quickest a stranger has guessed, and the calmest they have been,” it smiled- this time, it was void of taunt. “What made you stay when I warned you of the consequences?”
“Exactly that,” you admitted, peeking up at it, liking how focused it looked. “I’ll die anyway.” 
Mingi- or whoever was in that body, shrugged, so you asked it. “What are you?”
“Humans called me a demon before I possessed this body, so maybe I am a demon.”
You considered that- was that why Mingi was called the Child of Shadows? A shadow demon of sorts? 
“Well, what’s your name then?”
It paused, the outstretched arms falling back as it turned to look at you and consider your question- in all of its time as a demon in a human vessel, no one had ever bothered to ask its name. Such a simple, human question yet it felt something bubbling in its throat- perhaps those human emotions it despised. Perhaps it was Mingi fighting back for conscious control. Whatever it was… the demon found it so strange that someone was not immediately quivering and kneeling despite the visible shadows around it, despite the knowledge that it was a demon as old as time, perhaps. 
As if someone was looking at the demon itself for the first time- not Mingi’s eyes, but its own eyes.
“I might have forgotten my name,” it admitted. “I haven’t been called by my name in aeons.”
Aeons. Your heart sank and the demon felt that, but did not comment. 
“What do they call you then? They must refer to you by some name, right?”
“They just call me Erebos.”
“So you won’t tell me what your name is?”
Again. The demon found itself looking at you and for the first time in a while, a genuine chuckle escaped it. You, amused, turned to look at the stretch of the night sky, not wanting it to feel satisfaction- if it could feel anything in the first place.
“You’re funny, little bird. I quite like you already.”
You shrugged. “I bet you say that to every human who talks to you. A demon starved of company.”
This time, it roared in laughter and you couldn’t help but compare it to the sound of Mingi’s own laughter you had heard in the morning. Somehow, this one sounded more human than Mingi’s own laugh. “Feisty. You’re not like this when you’re talking to Mingi. You sounded like you hated him.”
“It’s not him I hate, he saved me. He was the one who saved me, right?” You asked and it nodded. “It’s you who confused me. I didn’t know you were… two separate people. How does that even work? Where is Mingi now?”
“So many questions,” it tsk-ed. “Mingi saved you. It was me last night. Mingi during the day, and me right now. Since we have to live in one body, we might as well get along and divide our hours, was the White Flame’s genius plan.”
“And is… is Mingi here right now?” You looked at him.
“Over the years, we’ve started sharing our consciousness. We might not always be able to control it, but we can see, hear and feel what the other does.”
Oh. So Mingi was there last night too. And he was probably here, watching you interact with the demon who had possessed his body. 
“Why did you possess him?”
The demon’s smile fell right as it heard the question and it almost glared at you. You understood why but you refused to cower under its scrutinising gaze. “That is not something you ask a demon, little bird.”
If you had any more questions, they were lost with the shadows now. Its gaze was hard and unwelcoming and you thought you might have made a mistake. You didn’t leave, though. Somehow, these shadows were still comforting enough.
—-----------------------
You may have given Erebos some company last night, but Mingi was hell-bent on pretending you did not exist. You supposed it was awkward for him too- to watch from afar, someone inside him taking control of his thoughts and actions. You were not sure what to make of it- did he not want you talking to Erebos at all? Even Seonghwa, who had warned you to stay in your room at nights, didn’t say much when he spotted you and the demon sharing silence.
Somehow, that seemed to weigh on your mind more than the fact that you were not in your town anymore. You had travelled all through the night and stopped at the vast expanse of field that bordered the river in the neighbouring town. Most of the day was spent sleeping and you finally woke up around sunset when you heard the faint tinkling of utensils in the kitchen. After washing up, you peeked through your door and spotted Seonghwa who seemed to sense you, turning around with a smile.
“Breakfast- or I suppose, dinner is ready,” he tasted one of the dishes and nodded to himself in satisfaction. You joined him near the counter and fiddled with the ends of your plain emerald dress that had ‘magically’ appeared in your wardrobe after Mingi went to town yesterday. 
“The others?” You asked.
“Wooyoung’s out cold, Mingi is outside inspecting our new location,” he told you. “I hope we get to stay here longer this time. It’s beautiful here.”
“Really?” The sound of creaks filled the room as you walked towards the window and you audibly gasped as you took in the pink and golden hues reflecting on the crystal clear river with hills across it, the fluffiest clouds in the sky and the grass a beautiful, darker shade of green than you had seen in the forest. 
You also spotted Mingi, standing at the back of the river and staring into the distance. With a nod from Seonghwa who muttered something about him waking Wooyoung up, you stepped outside and inhaled the scent of wet mud which calmed your otherwise raging nerves. You cautiously walked towards the looming figure and cleared your throat, making him glance back at you.
“Uh, dinner is ready,” you said, hating the way you sounded. You scanned his eyes and confirmed it was Mingi. 
Even though he didn’t answer, you remained standing a few feet behind him, drowning in questions that you wished to ask but didn’t have the guts to- why was talking to the demon somehow easier than talking to the human? Before you could open your mouth to ask something that was already at the tip of your tongue, Seonghwa shouted for you two to get inside and you clicked your tongue in annoyance, not waiting for him this time as you returned to the house. 
The silence that hung uncomfortably during dinner almost made you choke. You saw Seonghwa cautiously glance between you and Mingi multiple times, and if Wooyoung had not been so sleepy, he might have dared to comment on it. As soon as Mingi finished eating, he dropped his plates in the sink and said something about going into his room. When he disappeared, it felt like you could finally breathe.
“Is Mingi avoiding me?” You asked, worried you were disturbing the peace in this house- you had heard him laugh with the other two when you were not present and it hurt you that he was shutting you out more as time passed. “Is it because of something I did?”
“It’s just because he doesn’t like anyone interacting with Erebos,” Wooyoung answered. “It took us a lot of time to find the balance between our interactions with Erebos and Mingi too.”
“Well,” you pouted. “He should have warned me himself then, shouldn’t he?”
The two shrugged, perhaps used to these mood swings. You pouted further. “He shouldn’t have saved me in the forest and asked me to accompany him then.”
“You should say that to Mingi,” Wooyoung was stifling a smirk. “See how he answers that.”
“Wooyoung,” Seonghwa warned, turning to you. “Mingi helps anyone who needs it. We help anyone who needs it, because we all know what it is like to feel trapped and helpless. Mingi knows that better than any of us, so do not question him on that. Just… give him some time. He’ll warm up to you.”
You sighed deeply, understanding. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” Seonghwa smiled. “You’ll be fine.”
You did not go to find Erebos that night, waiting instead for Mingi the next morning at the same spot he had been in yesterday, at the bank of the river. And surprisingly, it was him who joined you with a book this time.
“Are you feeling well?” He inquired and you tried not to let the surprise show on your face. 
“I am, thank you for asking,” you tucked the hair that blew with the breeze back in the clip. “Are you okay?”
“Why would I not be okay?” He glanced at you.
“Are we okay?” You rephrased it and he sighed.
“I’m sorry if I was being an ass. You’ve… met Erebos, right?” You nodded and he continued. “Over time, I’ve learned to cohabitate with the demon in my body. It wasn’t always so manageable but it’s unusual for a human body to contain a demon within it for such a long period of time.”
Human body. Mingi was once human.
“Do you wish to be free?”
Mingi smiled at that. “I was anything but free when I was human. Ironically, the demon possessing me gave me more freedom than I ever had. I guess that is why we can tolerate each other now.”
“Why did you say you want me to stay away from you then?” You asked, curiosity taking the better of you.
Mingi’s smile seemed to be painful. “Why would you not stay away from a demon, y/n?”
“But you’re human… aren’t you? Or a mage now,” you wondered out loud. “Should I stay away from you too?”
Mingi didn’t answer that. He opened his book and scrolled through a few pages, buying time to think. You kept watching him- it felt like he was finally opening up to you, still so cautious and hesitant. “I don’t know.”
Despite the impending sense of danger, you found your frown relaxing and lips curving into a smile and when Mingi saw you, he smiled back.
Perhaps, this was the first step the two of you took together. 
“I’d say we should stay away from you,” Mingi found himself saying with a teasing tone. “You humans are always so reckless. And that smile is unnerving.”
Your smile widened. “You don’t get human company often, do you?”
Mingi’s smile fell again and you decided it wasn’t a topic they wanted to talk about- neither of them. You cleared your throat. “Thank you for saving me that day. I don’t think I got the chance to thank you.”
“It’s nothing,” he shook his head, looking back at his book. “I felt your senses numbed because of the potions. I couldn’t simply leave you be.”
“Thank you for today too,” you almost whispered.
“Today?”
“For finally talking to me- I thought you were cross with me,” you explained. 
“I still am, a little, just not with you,” he admitted, sighing deeply. “I don’t like the way Erebos talks to you, if I’m honest. It’s new.”
You pursed your lips- that explained his behaviour and the way he avoided you. He continued, “I won’t stop you from interacting with Erebos. Just be careful, okay?”
You nodded and sank your feet in the bare grass as Mingi went back to reading his book, the silence between you two comfortable for the first time.
—--------------------
You were settling into a routine in the house and it seemed like they had accepted you as a housemate.
It would have been much more difficult if it weren’t for the White Flame’s warm nature. You wondered how time hadn’t hardened him- he was more considerate than any human or mage you had ever met. You found his nature almost doting as he instructed you on the tasks you had to practically beg to share. As he taught you how to fix broken pipes or dangling planks, you shared stories of your life. He learned that you had been a servant in your own house before your stepmother resorted to imprisoning you in the tower because you tried to run away a few too many times. 
You learned that he wasn’t an angel at all- he was also a demon, though a different kind than Erebos. He resembled angels too much- both in his appearance and mannerisms and was outcasted by the demons. The angels didn’t accept him either. That’s how he earned one of his names ‘The Fallen Angel’, though he complained about the inaccuracy. You asked him if he was still calming you with his magic when you were around him, and he revealed that he had stopped doing that when you decided to stay. 
When Seonghwa was busy, you were with Wooyoung who didn’t have a fixed room for his experiments- he would drag his bag of potions anywhere he pleased and make home there, much to Seonghwa’s annoyance, though his smile would betray him. He filled any room with his presence, with his annoying but lovable loud laughter, with his stories and jokes. You finally told him that he had once come to your home and treated your father when he was suffering from the plague a few years ago, the one that took his life. He remembered that and was very surprised to learn that you were that man’s daughter.
“He told me I could trust you if the time ever came,” you had explained. “He told me to find you if things ever went south. I think he knew what was coming but couldn’t do anything about it.”
“He was a wise man,” Wooyoung had admitted. “And he couldn’t stop talking about you while I tried to heal him. You were so young, y/n. What did they do to you? You used to live like a princess.”
And that was the first time in years you shed tears for the life that was taken from you. When you cried, Seonghwa passed you a cup of tea and Wooyoung continued burning incense, muttering something about how some humans were worse than monsters. They let you cry in silence for as long as you wanted.
That night, it was Erebos who found you sitting on the roof, legs dangling. It tsk-ed as it nudged your thigh with its bare foot.
“I’m trying to attempt shadow-travel but I can’t focus because I can practically smell your tears and grief.”
“Shadow-travel?” You asked, and he scoffed at the curiosity behind your glazed eyes.
“I have some business to take care of in town, and it’s quicker to travel that way.”
“What business would you have?”
“I, too, have a life,” it slumped down next to you. “Would you like to join, little bird?”
“Can I?” You asked, wondering if Mingi would be okay with it in the morning.
“Yes, Mingi would be okay with it,” it rolled its eyes. “Can practically hear your thoughts.”
You stifled a grin, wiping your eyes. “Shall I get my cloak then?”
Erebos showed you around town- you decided to walk instead of shadow-travel- travelling that way with a human was risky business, it explained. You felt nostalgic as you walked in the lantern-lit streets, the smell of food and smoke filling you with an unexplainable glee in your heart. Erebos made you sit on one of the benches with a sandwich to keep you busy while it disappeared in the shadows. You didn’t complain- you were more than pleased to simply sit and observe the bustle. You hadn’t had such luxury in a while.
You almost didn’t notice the commotion behind you until you heard the faint sound of screams and you whipped your head towards the source, wondering where Erebos had disappeared. You decided to stick to its strict order not to move from this bench until it found you. Moments later, the demon was back, the people making way for it and you gaped at it.
“At least wipe the smug look off your face,” you muttered, making it grin. “What were you doing?”
“I don’t like unfinished business- especially when it’s people trying to start things that shouldn’t be messed with in the first place.”
You gulped at the threatening tone and it shook its head. “I can taste your fear, little bird.”
“I’m human, demon,” you taunted, making it laugh. “And I do not want to know what happened there. Just tell me if you hurt innocent people.”
“I may be a demon but I have morals too,” it tsk-ed in disappointment and you shrugged, falling in step with it as you went further away from town. “I never attack a human first.”
You asked why it needed morals when it was a demon and could do as it pleased. It told you that demons weren’t like how humans sketched them out to be in their poems and tales- they were much more than that. Despite being dark in nature, they weren’t consumed by evil just like humans weren’t all good, and angels not all that pure. Even as you reached the house, you spent the night learning about how demons were creatures with strict principles that they followed. You learnt that demons could feel emotions too, though time hardened them and morphed them, often into something unrecognisable. Erebos appreciated Seonghwa and told you how it was saved by him when it found itself in Mingi’s body, and how ever since they met Wooyoung, he was trying his best to make it easier for the two to cohabitate in one body.
And every time you interacted with the demon, just before you parted ways for the night, you would ask its name and it would look at you with unreadable eyes. You never got an answer.
Though your appreciation for Seonghwa and Wooyoung grew, you couldn’t help but appreciate Erebos too, you told it, for simply cooperating when it could have given up and taken control of Mingi long ago. It smiled and told you it wasn’t always so compliant and only settled down when it learned that it needed to find a way to leave this vessel without dying.
Mingi, you felt, was making a conscious effort to check up on you everyday- especially if you interacted with Erebos the night before. He never asked why or what you talked about, and you thought it was for the better. Since everyone else treated them as separate persons, you might as well too. 
But it was so hard to look at Mingi and not see his lips curled in a smirk- something that you had started to look forward to, an expression that once put distaste in your mouth but now made your heart skip a beat. It was hard to see his eyes and not find the twinkle of stars in his dark irises. It was hard to hear his voice and not find it almost echoing within your skull.
And tonight, as your feet padded down the stairs, wanting to get fresh air having just woken up from a nightmare that you were back in the tower, you found Mingi relaxing in the sofa seat next to the fireplace-
Not Mingi. Erebos.
“Way past your bedtime, little bird,” it said without looking at you.
“Very unlike you to just sit and stare at the fire… demon,” you countered, watching its body shake with laughter as you went to the kitchen to drink water. You joined it, sitting on the other seat with the glass half full. “No hunting humans tonight?”
“There’s you,” it commented. “I don’t even need to go to town.”
This time, your heart didn’t sink to your feet in fear but skipped a beat, drawing a frown on its face. You sipped the water, suddenly very interested in the burning fire as you recovered. 
“Someone couldn’t sleep well.”
“Right,” you sighed. “Do you need sleep?”
“Not at all.”
“You’re abusing Mingi’s body with lack of sleep.”
“He can sleep as long as he pleases when it’s his shift,” Erebos waved a hand in dismissal. “I have better things to do.”
“Definitely,” you muttered and Erebos raised a brow before leaning forward so it could meet your eyes.
“I don’t like that mocking tone, little bird.”
Though it was meant to threaten you, you rolled your eyes simply because Erebos was looking like it was enjoying this way too much. “Mean it when you say it then.”
Erebos clenched its jaws before relaxing back. “You’re not like this when you talk to Mingi or the others.”
You mirrored its posture. “You’re different.”
Perhaps, that’s not how you should have worded it. You saw Erebos’s eyes flash before you could correct yourself, its fists clenching and unclenching as if it was trying to control a response. You cleared your throat. “I mean… they don’t go around calling me ‘little bird’ and try to scare me or something. Wooyoung said it might be because you feed on fear.”
“Wooyoung was right, and I’ve been starving recently,” it licked its lips. “You’ve stopped fearing me, little bird. Not like you used to. I don’t know what to make of it.”
“That’s such a shallow way of thinking!” You couldn’t help the outburst. “When’s the last time you had a friend other than Seonghwa and Wooyoung?”
“They’re not my friends.” This time, Erebos’s voice did shake you. “They’ve been trying to get rid of me ever since they met me.”
“They’re trying to help you both,” you corrected and Erebos scoffed. “Do you like pushing people away? Do you like being alone, Erebos?”
“I’m not human enough to crave company or ‘like’ anything,” Erebos replied. “But I suppose I prefer when a certain human is not eating my ears off.”
You deadpan stared at the demon and it laughed in response. You shook your head, getting up. “Well, you can have the rest of the night with the one you love the most- your own self.”
Before you could take your third step, your wrist was grabbed and you were pulled towards a body- Mingi’s body, towards Erebos. It intertwined its hand with yours, noticing the glass still in the other hand. With a smirk, it twirled you around, earning a surprised yelp from you, leading you to the mantle of the fireplace. You placed the glass there just in time before you were pulled back.
“What are you doing?” You asked between laughs as you tried regaining your balance, your free hand instinctively going to hold Erebos’s. It scoffed in amusement, towering over you as it looked down at you. 
Erebos didn’t bother responding, simply shifting its hands in yours, watching your small hands intertwine in its large ones and you felt butterflies as you detected wonder in its eyes. The demon was then swaying you in small motions as it scanned every inch of you, practically drinking in the sight and you felt so exposed that you wished you could go back to the darkness you were so used to in the tower back home. 
“What are you doing?” You repeated, this time a whisper. Erebos met your eyes and you thought you saw its defences fall for a fraction of a second before it passed. The demon pulled you closer, just a step but enough that your bodies almost brushed.
“Why are you doing this to me, little bird?” It tilted its head.
“What did I do?” You dared to ask, feeling overwhelmed by the closeness of your bodies, by the fact that this was a demon in front of you, by the shadows that had now started to seep out of it. 
Erebos scanned you one last time. “You should go back to sleep.”
None of you made a move to let go of the other’s hands, none of you looked away from the other. Not until you saw Erebos clench its eyes shut in pain. You squeezed its hands once, softly, before drawing back. The demon opened its eyes, almost out of breath. You stepped away, turning to go but stopping midway.
You turned to look at it one last time. “What is your name… demon?”
For the first time since you were here, Erebos passed an actual smile, waving its hand in dismissal. You smiled back before going back to your room-
Unable to sleep for the remainder of the night. 
—--------------------
This time, Mingi was avoiding you on purpose. It was unsettling- you tried to strike up a conversation with him but his answers were dry and his smile didn’t meet his eyes. You ignored it until a few days passed, neither Mingi nor Erebos in your sight and when you were making your way to Mingi’s room to confront him, you noticed him in the hallway instead, bending down in the left corner and placing what looked like a scroll under the gap, sealing the plank back. You reckoned it must be something important he had to hide so you waited a few minutes until he got up.
You came into his sight and said, “You’ve been busy these days.”
“I have been,” he confirmed. For a second, you wondered if it really was just him being busy, having some ‘business’ to deal with in town, which he had explained a few days ago was attending the Conference of Mages which dealt with peace and accountability of rogue mages. But when his eyes didn’t meet yours, your suspicions were confirmed. He tried passing you but you spread your arms.
“I’m not letting you pass until you tell me why you are avoiding me- and don’t give me the same excuse.”
Mingi sighed in defeat- one thing he had learned about you was that you could be very, very stubborn. “I just needed to clear my head. We both did.”
We both.
You finally dropped your arms and followed him to the kitchen- he told you he just came home and wanted to grab something to eat. You stood awkwardly by the dainty glass decorations that Wooyoung had glued to the surface of one of the shelves so they wouldn’t fall when the house moved. You cleared your throat. “Did I do something wrong?”
Mingi didn’t like the way your voice shook when you asked that. He passed you a tight smile as he came to stand near the bookshelf, watching you. “You didn’t. It’s me this time.”
You stopped wiping, locking eyes with him. “What did you do?”
“I broke a rule- when Erebos and you were having… a moment… a few nights ago, I tried to take over. Erebos didn’t like it.”
You instantly knew what Mingi was talking about- when Erebos had clenched its eyes shut in pain. Your mouth parted and shut multiple times, trying to think of how to word your next question-
“I know,” Mingi answered anyway. “I shouldn’t have done it, but… I didn’t like it. I didn’t like the way Erebos was looking at you.”
What way was Erebos looking at you, and why did Mingi not like it? 
“I didn’t mean for it to happen,” you almost whispered, drawing a step away, feeling overwhelmed by the proximity and his curious eyes on you. “I… I don’t like when you avoid me, Mingi. If my presence here is making it hard for you, I can leave-”
“Not at all,” he stepped forward as if to reach for you but stopped himself. “That’s not it.”
“I just miss you,” you exhaled in relief. “I wish you could tell me these things. I wish you would let me in, Mingi.”
Mingi looked like he was in pain and for a moment, you wondered if you had said something wrong. He finally smiled, taking another step forward and this time, you let him. You let him put his hands hesitantly on your shoulders. 
“You’re right- I should have just talked to you. Avoiding you won’t make anything right. I’m sorry.”
“I wish you would stop saying sorry too,” you smiled and he finally laughed. 
“I just am. I’ll try not to do that again, but I can’t promise. It’s hard when you’re not in control of your own actions, and if Erebos tries something with you, I don’t want you to look at me differently.”
So that’s what it was. You put your hands over his. “You’re not Erebos. Erebos is not you. I know that very well. Even though you share a body, you don’t look the same, don’t feel the same,” you said and Mingi gave your shoulders a squeeze. “We’re just y/n and Mingi right now, so talk to me, okay?”
Mingi nodded and asked if you wanted to join him for dinner- he didn’t have much time until Erebos would take over. You nodded and started setting the table, Mingi helping and he told you about the conference that took place today and how Erebos was also a part of it, helping eliminate threats to both humans and mages. You told him you learned to make bread pudding with Seonghwa and waited for him to try it, grinning when he told you it was better than Seonghwa’s. 
It was so easy to talk to Mingi like this- an exchange of how your day went, sharing bits and pieces of your past sometimes, joking with each other- Mingi wasn’t very shy when talking which helped a lot. He enjoyed chatting with everyone but sometimes, you wondered if he was reminded of something from his past when he would zone out or his smile would fade. Just like now.
“Are you with me?” You asked cautiously, wondering if you were going to see the shift. 
“I’m here,” Mingi blinked, shaking his head. “Just got lost for a second.”
“Is my company that boring to you?” You pouted.
“It’s not that,” he shook his head. “It’s just been a while since I’ve had such mundane interactions.”
“Does it remind you of the time when you were human?” You dared to ask. He didn’t mind, thankfully.
“Not really, but… we’ve had a few human guests over the time. Some stayed until their end. Some left because they saw what living here would mean for them. Now that we have you in our house, we enjoy the company. We’re a bit bored of each other, the rest of us, so we really don’t mind you. It’s just sad to think how it will come to an end one day.”
“You’re worrying about the future when you haven’t even tried living in the present… aren’t you?”
“It’s you humans who think living in the present is the right way. You understand later that every decision you make in the present influences the future. And when something bad happens, you start tracing it back to the moment it started going wrong. It’s too late then.”
“Then there’s no way of knowing if the decisions I make will be good for me. Does it really matter if they are good for me?” You paused, thinking about Erebos all of a sudden. Thinking about the way your skin ignited with pleasure for the first time and how you longed to feel that way again. “Sometimes you just can’t help yourself, can you?”
“You don’t mean that,” Mingi almost whispered, his raspy voice making you shiver involuntarily. You wondered if he had read your mind.
“Do you feel what Erebos does too?” You asked, leaning forward as well. “Where do your feelings differentiate?”
“Erebos is a demon, it doesn’t feel-”
“You’re wrong,” you shook your head. “You can’t tell me that when you haven’t seen the way its eyes changed that night.”
“Y/n-” Mingi warned, the left side of his face twitching. “I know I said I don’t mind you talking to Erebos, but it is a demon. It will take advantage of you at some point- that is its nature.”
“I can take care of myself,” you drew back and watched Mingi sigh in frustration. “You should understand that Erebos hasn’t done anything that I didn’t like.”
You let that confession hang in the air and Mingi tried processing it but he was so confused. Just why were you so fearless, so stubborn, especially about this? It’s almost like-
Like you had no reason to be afraid of.
Mingi got up abruptly, almost giving you a jumpscare. He looked at you, feeling out of breath. “You’re on your own then. But please be careful.”
You made a mental note to ask Erebos just what he had done to their human guests in the past as you watched Mingi disappear into his room. You didn’t want to see Erebos tonight, though. If the demon could give you this cold treatment, you could return that too. Even if for one night.
—------------------
“There’s something wrong with her.”
“Are you sure she’s not simply sulking?” Wooyoung glanced at Seonghwa who shook his head in denial. 
“She’s never been this quiet since she came. She’s like you- always babbling-”
“I can hear you,” you called out, not bothering to look at the duo, instead continuing to stare into the fire with an unfinished black crochet scarf in your hands. 
“Why are you so quiet today? Is it because I scolded you when you forgot to turn the oven off?” Seonghwa asked.
You finally looked at the Fallen Angel who thought you were worried because you left the burner on. He scoffed at your amused expressions. “That’s not it.”
“Let her be, everyone needs some peace and quiet sometimes,” Wooyoung waved a hand in dismissal, going back to messing with his potions. “I need some peace and quiet today too.”
“Right,” Seonghwa muttered. “If you make it past half an hour without speaking a word, I’ll let you use me as your lab rat for your next experiment.”
You gasped at his offer because you had seen Wooyoung dissect dead animals and it was not a pretty sight. Wooyoung’s eyes, however, glinted as he accepted the challenge. You sighed, going back to staring at the fire.
You kept thinking about every interaction you had had with Mingi and Erebos so far. Even though you knew they were two separate entities, you were worried you weren’t making the distinction clear- when you were angry with Erebos, Mingi got to deal with the aftermath and vice versa. 
Mingi was still the same old person he was from the first day he met you. You would join him with a book by the river when he wasn’t out or you would exchange stories at the table. He stopped asking you about Erebos- you figured you had struck the right chord that day. Instead, he now answered your silly but curious questions about magic, about their travels and adventures. He would ask if you had a good sleep or if you learned anything new from the boys who were teaching you anything you were willing to learn. It was comfortable to talk to Mingi now and you had started looking forward to your interactions with him.
Erebos, however, was not the same person you had encountered on your first night here, the one who was so unwilling to look at you and wanted you to run away. If you could look at it from an objective lens, you were pretty sure Erebos was warming up to you. You had a habit of sleeping very late at night so you spent most nights hanging out with the demon- sometimes inside as you both fought your own battles in silence, occasionally exchanging words. Or sometimes, you would lie down with him on the grass and stare at the sky until you fell asleep and later wake up in your bed.
And when you had a moment with one of them, one that made you feel unexplainable things, one that made you shiver or made your heart flutter, you found yourself expecting it to be the same with the other. It wasn’t fair, but you couldn’t help it. 
You kept mindlessly crocheting or resorting to staring into the fire even when Wooyoung finally gave up staying silent and Seonghwa and him started to argue like children. Mingi came and joined the ruckus and you only passed a small smile, busying yourself. The day passed just like that and at some point, you must have fallen asleep on the sofa because when you woke up, Erebos was seated right in front of you, watching you with curious eyes.
You blinked away the sleep, suddenly feeling conscious of the way the neckline of your dress exposed your left shoulder more than intended. You straightened your dress and watched Erebos relax back.
“How long have you been sitting and staring?”
“Not long,” it replied. You were pretty sure that was a lie. 
“Not going to the conference tonight?” You inquired.
“I got a message- it has been delayed,” Erebos licked its lips slowly. “Why were you sleeping here?”
“I was…” waiting to see you- “crocheting…”
“I don’t see any evidence of that.”
You looked down in your lap and laughed a little- it must have been Wooyoung or Seonghwa who placed the material away and put a blanket on you. You pursed your lips. “You’re talkative tonight.”
“I bet you like that,” Erebos cocked its head.
“See?” You managed to say despite the fluttering of your stomach. “Very talkative. Go scare a human in town or something…”
Erebos let out a deep laugh and you joined, shaking your head. You stretched, spotting the new moon outside. “The sky is lovely tonight.”
“Do you want to climb the hill you’ve been watching every day since you came here? Might give you a better view.”
An offer. You smiled and nodded, getting up and drinking a glass of water before joining the demon outside. The hill was across the river and you wondered if you were going to make a round trip, but-
“We’re going through the river. I’ll make a boat for you.”
“There’s no way I’m going through the river,” you halted, Erebos laughing yet again. “I’ll drown!”
“Just like this house moves on tyres made of shadow, I can materialise a boat for us to travel in. It will be safe-”
“No-”
“And I will be right next to you,” the demon completed and you pressed your lips in a tight line. “You won’t drown.”
You didn’t answer, looking at the awfully still surface of the river. Erebos stood next to you and you felt your fingers brush its own.
“I won’t let you drown. Do you trust me, little bird?”
Did you trust the demon with your life? You could practically hear the sound of your own heart as you nudged its fingers with yours. A leap of faith. You watched Erebos’s lips curl into a smile and it spread his hands forward, shadow seeping out of the body until a black boat stood in the river. Erebos stepped inside first and even though you had seen the shadow tyres support the weight of this house, you still gasped in surprise. 
The demon extended its hand for you. You didn’t hesitate to take it this time and it helped you settle in the boat but you refused to let its hand go and it made it chuckle. With its other hand, it steered the boat swiftly towards the other end and you laughed in both surprise and fear, water droplets spraying your face when you peeked out of the boat though you didn’t mind one bit- it was so thrilling. More thrilling than anything you had ever experienced in your lifetime.
And when you looked at Erebos with the biggest smile on your face, the demon felt its heart ache and it wondered if it was because of Mingi even though it had pushed Mingi far, far away into its subconscious. You felt its hands grip yours tighter as if squeezing it and you didn’t look away from its face until you reached.
The climb up the hill was just as silent, none of you letting go of the other’s hand. You let it be- it certainly helped you move faster as Erebos instructed you where to step and where not to. When you reached the peak and you were out of breath, Erebos helped you settle on a rock, finally leaving your hand only to shake its head and dig out a handkerchief from its pocket.
“Look at you, all spent just because you climbed a few rocks,” it tsk-ed and you pouted. Shaking its head again, it started wiping the sweat off your forehead, grinning to itself at the state of your hair blown back. Putting its handkerchief away, the demon pushed your hair away from your face, caressing your head with a faint smile-
And finally noticing the look on your face. The wide, curious eyes, the hesitant look in them, the parted lips. The uneven breaths. 
You watched its eyes flash with something indecipherable yet again as it scanned your face, noticing its thumb almost at the corner of your lips. You watched its brows furrow as a flurry of emotions crossed its face- emotions you had never seen on anyone’s face before. You couldn’t hear the sound of cicadas or the wind anymore, only the rustling of your hair as its hand moved away from your face only to slide its thumb across your lower lip.
Even if Erebos didn’t watch your eyes to confirm, it could feel your heart beating as if it was an extension of its own pulse, taste the excitement mixed with a little bit of fear in the air. And locking eyes with you only made the demon more confused- you looked so vulnerable in that moment that its primal instincts shouted at it to shatter you, but it pushed them away. It pushed everything away and drew its hand back, about to move away but-
But you grabbed its hand in yours. You did not know what took over you in that moment, but you placed its thumb back where it was- between your parted lips. 
And then you kissed it softly.
You heard the demon stifle a cry- of pain? Of surprise? You did not care. You locked eyes with the figure towering over you, ready to meet your fate.
And when the demon cupped your face with a hesitancy that almost broke you, you licked your lips, so eager to meet its own. When it inched closer, you let your hands grip its wrists, and when your nose brushed with its own sharp nose, you let out a small exhale. You were both at a loss of words at that moment, so you only arched your neck up to let it know you needed this, perhaps as much as the demon itself.
A demon starved of love, starved of affection. That’s what Erebos was. And when it pushed every thought away and brushed its lips across yours, it finally understood that it never craved fear-
It craved this. 
Parting its own lips, it kissed you, for the first time in its life- it did not count the times Mingi had kissed his past lovers because Erebos thought it was disgusting and hid itself so far away in Mingi’s subconscious that it didn’t even remember what happened later. This was the first time the demon itself was in charge, and it had no idea what to do but found itself locking and unlocking its lips with yours, its hand automatically going to grip your neck. It swallowed your moan of pleasure, kissing you deeper and deeper until you almost slipped from the rock and your hands went around its neck for support, breaking apart from the kiss-
And looking at the demon, its eyes wide and perhaps as vulnerable as yours.
Erebos picked you up effortlessly, making you yelp in surprise and wrap your legs around its waist- perhaps, a wrong move because there was an unquestionable fire in its eyes. It led you to another rock and placed you on it so that your heights matched, out of breath- you wondered how a demon was out of breath now. You didn’t unwrap your legs, not quite, and you didn’t need to because it gripped your hip with one hand and brought you closer, craning your neck with the other and going back to kissing you, deeper and more desperate this time. You kissed back with equal urgency, welcoming its tongue in yours, feeling its hand creep up inside your dress and you finally drew back-
“Erebos-”
It swallowed your name back in another kiss and for a moment, you saw stars. This couldn’t be how it felt kissing a human, you wondered. Was it because Erebos was a demon? It couldn’t be like this, setting you on fire wherever its hands traced your skin and nails dug in, making you buzz with excitement and want-
“Erebos, please,” you broke away, pushing the blue and black strand of its hair back. “Look at me.”
Erebos locked its eyes with you and you felt your heart sink when you saw nothing but darkness in its eyes. It inched closer, kissing your jaw and sucking and nibbling on your neck almost harshly, and you stifled your moans-
“Not like this, Erebos,” you pleaded, cupping its face again and making it lock eyes with you. “Where are the stars in your eyes, demon?”
That seemed to click something in its minds as the pupils lightened and the twinkle of its eyes returned. It took deep, uneven breaths, caressing your face with both hands. 
“I- I don’t know what happened.”
“It’s okay,” you assured the demon, though you had no idea either. “It’s okay-”
“Did I hurt you?” Erebos voice sounded so fragile that you felt the sting of tears in your eyes- this was the demon they warned you to stay away from? You watched its eyes darken when it inspected a bruise forming on your neck. “...I hurt you.”
“No, no you didn’t, look at me,” you scolded, pecking its lips again. “You didn’t hurt me. You just… I don’t know. Where did you go?”
Erebos looked so confused. You buried your face in its neck as you brought its body closer to you. “Thank you for bringing me here tonight.”
The demon caressed your head as it clenched its eyes shut again, in pain- Mingi was doing it again, trying to take over. Erebos supposed he had every right to now. However, it would not let Mingi take this moment from it, not again. So with all its willpower, Erebos pushed Mingi away and kissed the top of your head.
“Little bird,” it whispered. “What have you gotten yourself into?”
—---------------------
What had you gotten yourself into? 
It was your turn to avoid Mingi this time, simply because you couldn’t face him. Not when you did what you did last night and Mingi shared the same body as Erebos. 
What were you thinking?
You were mortified, yes, but you also did not regret one bit of it, if you were honest with yourself. Mingi could be angry with you all he wanted.
You might have regretted it- Erebos was a demon. You still didn’t understand why its eyes went so dark as if the demon lost itself for a moment, but when you called its name and it came back, when it asked if you were hurt as if it pained the demon itself… 
You simply couldn’t imagine why Erebos looked at you with such worried eyes. Why would a demon care if it hurt you or not, unless it actually cared?
And if it actually cared… What did it mean for you?
“Little bird, what have you gotten yourself into?”
You refused to leave your room even after you woke up, even when your stomach grumbled with hunger. Even Seonghwa got worried and checked in on you with a tray of food, understanding something must have happened between you and Mingi- or Erebos. Thankfully, he didn’t insist you join them. He let you have your space and you were grateful for that. 
That night, Erebos didn’t come to look for you either. You remained cooped up in your room, obsessively cleaning it to make up for the guilt of slacking on your other duties and sometimes peeking out of the window- neither Mingi nor Erebos seemed to have gone out today. 
The next day, Seonghwa had had enough of your moping and came into your room, clicking a wooden spoon on a metal dish as morning bells to wake you up. You groaned and hid your face in the pillow but Seonghwa made the pillow burst into feathers with his magic, making you almost cry.
“I only tolerate moping for one day, y/n,” he told you as if it was a rule you had to abide by to live in this house. “Get up. Fix any broken planks- the wind last night was strong- and then join me on the roof for cleaning.”
“Why won’t you use your magic to clean?” You sighed and he ignored that, going in the next room to wake Wooyoung up- you could hear him yelling in response. Smiling at that, you finally got up and stumbled towards the bathroom, nearly forgetting Mingi lived in this very house until you bumped into a body in the hallway and muttered apologies-
Only to look up and see Mingi.
“Uh, I was just,” you pointed to the bathroom and he scanned your face, making you gulp. He muttered a sorry before letting you walk past him and when you entered the bathroom, you shut the door and nearly sank down the door.
How were you going to face him?
You were very distracted as you fixed the planks dangling by the window in the hallway, almost nailing your finger a couple of times. When you were done, you were about to head to the roof when you almost tripped on your feet-
You looked down and spotted a plank a little lifted in the air that had caused you to almost fall face-first. You were about to nail it when you recalled that this was the spot Mingi had hid something that day- you should probably not nail it.
Curiosity took the better of you and you moved the plank- there was indeed a scroll inside. Looking around, you hesitated a bit before you took out the scroll and unrolled it, a few verses of what looked like a poem on it-
“Once the shadow, once the light 
As one, the two must thrive  
A curse both must fight 
To one’s end, they dive 
For love, with all their might 
Hearts awakened, live alive”
You figured it might be Mingi’s sad attempt at poetry and put the scroll back where it was, fixing the plank better- if he had to hide it, he could at least hide it properly. 
Thankfully, he was not on roof cleaning duty with you and when you went to join Seonghwa there after a light breakfast, he passed you a sceptical look before handing you the mop.
“What’s up with you these days?” 
You wondered how to answer that. Seonghwa tsk-ed at you. “Why are you avoiding Mingi?”
“Erebos,” you gave in and Seonghwa raised a brow. “Because of Erebos. Because…” you groaned in frustration. “I don’t know. I might have done something stupid. I don’t know how to face Mingi.”
“Just talk to him,” he told you, attacking a corner on the floor with a mop and you suppressed a giggle at his dedication. “Avoiding each other won’t do either of you any good. It might calm Erebos down too.”
“Why? What happened to Erebos?”
“I think it’s angry with Mingi for trying to take control of him again,” Seonghwa revealed and you wondered if that happened while you were on the hill two nights ago. “The last time this happened, the conflict grew until Erebos took full control of Mingi and didn’t let him back in for a while. So my advice is, just talk and smother their conflict if you’re involved.”
You bit your lips- you were messing things up. You didn’t mean for it to happen this way, and you needed to confront Mingi now. 
So after you were done for the day, when there were a few hours left until sunset, you knocked on Mingi’s door. When he opened the door and looked surprised, you half expected him to slam the door in your face but he simply passed a smile.
“What brings you here?”
He noticed the flush on your cheeks. He didn’t need your answer, he knew why you were here. So before you could say something, he opened the door wider and let you in. 
You had been in his room maybe twice before, but you still enjoyed looking around at the desk next to the window with a lamp and notes sprawled across its surface, the blue and grey curtains and pillows- had he matched on purpose? The paintings of shadows on his wall that must have been Erebos’s doing. You sat at the edge of the bed and he took the seat near you.
“Are you okay?” You asked.
“I am,” his voice was low. “Are you?”
“I think, yes,” you wanted to meet his eyes but couldn’t look at him. “I wanted to talk to you about… two nights ago.” Mingi shifted uncomfortably at the mention and you licked your suddenly dry lips as you finally locked eyes with him. “Are you angry with me?”
“Why would I be angry with you?” Mingi’s voice was almost a whisper and it only confused you further.
“I… I don’t know what you’re thinking, Mingi,” you sighed. “I expected you to come bursting through my room and yell at me, warn me to be careful or something, but you… both of you- why are you giving me space now?”
Mingi took a deep breath. “I do want to ask you why you kissed Erebos. But… it’s not my place to ask, is it?”
“I mean…” your cheeks were flushing. “You do share a body, unfortunately. Maybe you do have a right to ask.”
Mingi took another deep breath. “I’ve lived a long life, y/n. I’ve had lovers in the past too. At first, navigating my relationships was awkward- especially when Erebos and I didn’t have better control of ourselves. And Erebos drove away anyone I got close to- more often unintentionally. No one likes demons- but you,” he cocked his head. “You’re different when you’re with Erebos. You’re not like that with me.”
“Do you wish I was?”
“And you ask the most unexpected questions,” he smiled in defeat. “So tell me, why did you do it?”
“I don’t know,” you shrugged, finally feeling a bit relaxed now that he had broken the ice. A part of you wished you and Mingi could talk about it as if Erebos was a separate, independent entity. “I like Erebos. The demon… is not all that bad. And I might have regretted it but… sometimes I feel like it has a heart too, you know? The way it talks or looks at certain things…”
“Erebos does not have a heart,” Mingi reminded you softly, leaning forward. “And I’m scared the demon might take advantage of you.”
“I understand your worries, Mingi,” you nodded. “But really, I think I know what I’m doing. I just want to know if you’re okay with that. I will take a step back but I won’t stop spending time with Erebos.”
“I’m not okay with that,” Mingi said after a moment and you frowned in confusion. “I… I don’t want you to get hurt. If Erebos does something… I fear you’ll look at me with hatred and disgust in your eyes.”
“Oh, Mingi,” you got up- he was genuinely worried about you. How stupid had you been to dismiss that? “I would never…”
“That’s the thing, y/n,” he shook his head with a sad smile. “I’ve always had to deal with the aftermath of things I didn’t do. I’m afraid it will happen again.”
“What did Erebos do?” You asked, walking cautiously towards him and he looked up at you with guarded eyes. “I’m sorry for your pain.”
“It’s okay,” he looked down. “I haven’t been all that good either. I’m no better than a demon myself-”
“You’re wrong,” you brought shaking hands to hold his face and make him look at you. “You’re one of the kindest souls I’ve met, Mingi. You saved me and I am forever in your debt-”
“There’s no debt-”
“No, listen,” your brows furrowed in focus as you locked eyes with his dark pupils, trying not to imagine the stars in his eyes you had started to love. “I like where we are, Mingi. I wish you would open up to me more and stop being cautious. I wish you would tell me exactly what bothers you so I can at least do something about it instead of treading carefully around you. I wish you would… look at me, Mingi.”
You didn’t know where the words came from, but one thing you were sure about was that you were addressing Mingi, not Erebos. 
“How can I look at you when every time you look at me, you think of the demon inside me?”
You smiled at that. “These brown eyes of yours don’t belong to the demon. Nor does the kindness in them. Neither are they so guarded-” you traced his brows and Mingi inhaled sharply. “And your smile- it isn’t taunting. It isn’t demanding. It is the loveliest smile I’ve seen and produces the loveliest sounds I’ve heard- they’re yours.”
This time, you couldn’t help but trace his lips. The same lips that had kissed you, the same softness of them- your heart fluttered at the proximity and switch of positions now. Mingi, however, was in a trance and didn’t move at all, only watching you staring at his lips for the longest time until you blinked, finally coming back to reality. You smiled again, leaning in and pressing a chaste kiss to his forehead. 
“When I see you, I only see you,” you said- it wasn’t a lie. “And when I see Erebos… I only see the demon. I’m trying my best not to mix the two. You don’t have to be worried about what Erebos does to me, just as Erebos is not worried about what you do with me.”
“And what makes you think Erebos is not worried?” Mingi said and you raised a brow, drawing your hands away from his face. “Do you know why I didn’t come yelling at you yesterday? Because Erebos took over me every time I thought of that.”
Despite the graveness of the topic, you couldn’t help but laugh at that and soon Mingi joined, both of you shaking your heads in amusement. “So I was right about you. I do know you.”
“No you don’t,” Mingi scoffed and for a moment, you saw Erebos behind those eyes. “Anyways, it’s really not a good idea, whatever you think you’re doing. Ask Erebos tonight what he wants with you, will you?”
So you waited for Erebos by the fireplace like you usually did. And this time, Erebos joined, hesitancy in its steps so unlike its usual behaviour. The demon slumped down on the sofa across you and stared daggers into the fireplace.
“Someone’s sulking,” you commented.
“Not in the mood tonight, little bird.”
You narrowed your eyes. “Why?”
“You know why.”
“I don’t,” you straightened, not liking its tone. “So tell me why.”
“Why did you talk to Mingi about us?”
The demon finally met eyes with you and you wiped any expressions off your face before you replied, “I didn’t realise I was not allowed to talk with Mingi about the very demon who lives inside him.”
“You know what I’m talking about,” it clenched its jaw and you realised you did. But you weren’t going to admit it.
“Why don’t you tell me what exactly you didn’t like?”
“Look at you,” it scoffed. “What answers are you trying to get out of me?”
You slumped back in defeat. “First of all, I can talk to Mingi about whatever I want. You don’t get to have a say in it. And secondly… I haven’t even asked you anything yet.”
Erebos mirrored your position. “Then why does Mingi get to have a say in what we do?”
“He doesn’t-”
“But you told him you will take a step back because he’s interfering-”
“That’s not why-” you paused as realisation dawned on you. “Are you pissed because I said I’d take a step back from what we did?”
When Erebos didn’t answer, you leaned forward. “I am taking a step back from you because when you kissed me that night, it wasn’t you. What happened to you that night, Erebos? You scared me for a moment and then you looked hurt. What am I supposed to make of it?”
Erebos didn’t meet your eyes, fiddling with the ends of its shirt. 
“What do you want with me, Erebos?” You finally asked the question that had been gnawing on your mind before Mingi ever instructed you. However, Erebos remained quiet. You let the demon have a few moments until you couldn’t take it anymore and then you got up.
“Don’t come to me until your head is clear.”
“Wait-” 
You stopped walking away when you heard the urgency in the demon’s voice. You turned to find Erebos standing as if it was about to come after you if you didn’t stop. The demon came near you, running a hand through its messy hair and you turned to hear it. 
“I don’t know what happened to me,” Erebos finally admitted, its voice low and your heart tugged. “All I know is that I’ve never wanted anything more in that moment and I was consumed by something foreign even for me. If you hadn’t stopped me, you would have regretted it. I thought I hurt you, and I didn’t like it, even when I usually enjoy hurting humans. What do I make of it, little bird? Why don’t you tell me?”
You knew you were treading on such dangerous territories but the fact that Erebos was making all these confessions, you simply couldn’t find it in your heart to leave it be. You bit the inside of your cheek as you tried to work out a response but you found yourself speechless instead.
“I don’t like the way you’re looking at me, little bird,” the demon whispered and you shook your head. 
“What will we do, Erebos?”
“Do we have to worry?” Erebos stepped towards you, making you take a step back out of habit. It smirked and you rolled your eyes, knowing it was in teasing mode now. It stepped towards you, making you step back until your back hit the wall and you were trapped. You glared at the demon.
“Now this is what I like to see,” Erebos grinned. You pushed its chest but it grabbed your wrists, making you gape at it but when it caressed them softly, your eyes changed-
“This look in your eyes,” the demon’s raspy voice practically sounded inside you. “I don’t want you to look at anyone else with that look in your eyes.”
“I didn’t-”
“Not even Mingi,” it almost snarled and instead of fear, warmth coursed through your body. “No one else, you understand?”
“I don’t look at Mingi that way-”
“Don’t make me shut you up,” it cocked its head dangerously. “Now… what were you saying about taking a step back from us? When I can practically taste your needs?”
“Erebos,” you sighed in defeat, resting your head on its chest. “Please. Let me think this through.”
“Why do you need to think this through?” Erebos practically whined. “Look at me, little bird.”
With immense effort, you raised your head. If you expected to see the same darkness that took over the demon that night, it wasn’t there. It was just… Erebos being itself. However, you were a bit startled by the sudden proximity as if it finally sank in that you were in its arms yet again. Erebos’s eyes were glazed and it pressed its lips to your temple, lingering before drawing back.
“You can think all you want,” the demon whispered in your ear, tugging at your earlobe with its teeth, making a whimper leave your mouth. “But I know you’ll come back to me, little bird.”
You instinctively craned your neck and you could feel Erebos smirk as it trailed its lips along your neck, resting at your collarbone, its warm breath caressing your skin. You longed to touch the demon but its grip on your wrists was strong. When its full lips pressed on the edge of your collarbone, your knees nearly gave in and you struggled to stand.
As if having proved a point, Erebos stepped back. “I’m not human so I can wait for you as long as you want,” it said, gaze travelling everywhere on your face. “So you can take your time.”
You narrowed your eyes, snatching your wrists away and rubbing them. “You could have simply said that.”
“Now where’s the fun in that?” Erebos smirked and you tried to calm your thumping heart. “Talking about fun… want to go mage-hunting with me? I have some rogue mages I plan to catch tonight.”
“I’m sure I’ll only slow you down,” you retorted but the demon shook its head, saying you wouldn’t.
It couldn’t have been more wrong.
“You may have the ability to see in the dark but in case you forgot, I’m a mere human,” you spat, scoffing when Erebos stifled its laugh, tripping yet again on another object in the narrow alley you were navigating through. 
“Hold my hand then,” Erebos sounded so smug that you refused to comply. You knew the demon was trying to initiate physical contact through any means possible- all night, it had been a battle of finger brushes, stolen pecks to the cheek or forehead which may have made your heart skip a beat at first but was now annoying you to death-
Another kiss on your temple and a deep laughter boomed and you nearly screamed in frustration. “Erebos, I swear to the heavens above I will obliterate you-”
“Shh,” you felt a finger on your lips in the utter darkness. “Someone’s here- don’t move.”
You obeyed, eyes wide as you glanced around, barely seeing anything in the cloudy night. What were you thinking when you decided this was a good idea?
“I sense one of them,” the demon whispered in your ear, guiding you to stand next to the wall and stay there. “I’ll be back. You have your knife, yes?”
“Oh, I do, completely forgot,” you muttered, checking in your cloak. “Should have stabbed you when I had the chance.”
“I’m going to remove the shadows from around you,” Erebos said and slowly, your vision became better. With a gentle pat to your cheek, the demon went after the mage, leaving you smiling to yourself.
The smile fell when you heard a scream that did not belong to Erebos. You waited for the sounds to die, almost moving from your spot but you knew better than to disobey the demon. After a few minutes, it was back looking proud of itself and you shook your head.
“Are we done?” You asked and Erebos nodded. “Did you… kill the mage?”
“Only put shadow cuffs on him,” Erebos answered. “They nullify magic.”
Your mouth shaped into an O and you asked if you were going home now. Erebos told you it had one last spot to visit and you followed, this time hand intertwined with its own.
You never expected the spot to be a graveyard. You squeezed the demon’s hand but it didn’t respond, simply navigating through the graves until it stopped in front of an unnamed one with a cherry blossom tree sprouting from it.
You watched Erebos look up as if it was praying- who did demons pray to? Did they share the same gods as humans? It didn’t leave your hand once, though, and you felt as if you were invading a private moment. 
When Erebos was done, it passed you a smile and led you further to a bench where you sat. “You must have questions.”
“I do, but you don’t have to answer them,” you told the demon who looked at you gratefully, though it decided to tell you.
“The first time Mingi fell in love after we started sharing a body, I was disgusted by those foreign emotions. It was like the human lost all control of who he was, of his heart and mind. And at that time, we did not know how to live with each other and often slipped into each other’s consciousness unknowingly. And with that… my magic was unstable as well. One wrong move on my part and I took away something from Mingi that I’m still sorry for.”
Your heart sank as you glanced towards the grave and then back at Erebos. “You blame yourself.”
Erebos nodded at your statement. “It’s the only thing I have felt sorry for in my life, because I, too, experienced the love when it was not meant for me. When I didn’t welcome it.”
It explained so much of Mingi’s hesitant and cautious behaviour, of his worries and fears. It also explained some of Erebos’s behaviour. You put a hand on top of the demon’s hand, caressing it. 
“Actions like these wouldn’t have meant anything for me, but after centuries, my heart feels warm again- I don’t know if it’s Mingi’s heart or mine, and it’s making me confused. That night… I almost made the same mistake again and I was so scared. I’m not scared to face the consequences, I’m scared to live with them.”
“But you didn’t,” you whispered. “You didn’t lose control.”
“And what if I do?” Erebos looked at you, eyes dark. “Perhaps, living inside a human has changed me. All I wanted was to destroy yet here I am. I want you all to myself, so selfishly. I want to feel these funny and strange feelings more. I want you, but what if I make the same mistake, this time with someone I-”
With someone I love- the statement hung in the air- perhaps because the demon was not sure if it was love though it had never desired for anything more, perhaps because it was afraid to say it in case things went south, perhaps because it couldn’t bear to see the disgust in your eyes at its confession-
But then you rested your head on Erebos’s shoulder and all its worries dissipated. “I don’t know what it’s like to love,” you said. “I don’t know what this is either, but… I like it. And I’m not afraid of you, Erebos. I feel safe with you- I don’t know why. I never once felt unsafe with you, even when you nearly lost control.”
You felt Erebos relax considerably at your confession. You continued. “I’m sorry for what happened. It must have been hard for you too.”
There it was- your consideration. The one thing that drew Erebos to you from the first moment you met. No one had ever talked to the demon like that in its entire life- how could it not love it?
So the demon rested its face against your head, an impending feeling of doom swirling in its gut, because there was one thing both Mingi and Erebos hid from you-
That you could not love the both of them at the same time. Even if you were halfway there already and neither of them was able to stop you, you could not. It would be the end of one or the other, but…
Did it matter if they got a taste of your love?
—-----------------------
“Wait- don’t light the fire just yet- Wooyoung!”
You shut your eyes more in defeat than to brace yourself from the loud blast that sounded because Wooyoung lit the match at the wrong time during the middle of creating a potion. You could smell smoke and hear Wooyoung’s low giggles and you wondered why you ever agreed to experiment with the healer.
Your father had worked with mages for a long time, and when he was sick and had contacted Wooyoung, they had come up with recipes for new potions while Wooyoung healed him. Your father gave you his notes before his death and you still remembered the recipes, deciding to work with Wooyoung, trying the one for- 
“Agility, you said?” Wooyoung asked, coughing a bit and you finally opened your eyes to see him draw a cross on his notes. 
“Yes, and if you hadn’t been hell-bent on tweaking it, we wouldn’t be covered in soot,” you groaned. “I said light the fire after the lavender is soaked in the liquid, not when it’s still floating.”
“Are you sure it works?” Wooyoung passed you a cryptic look. “Maybe I do need to tweak it…”
“It’s worked,” you folded your arms defensively. “I’ve used them,” you said, recalling when you once saw your father and Wooyoung working in his lab. “You must remember from his notes, right?”
“Always sneaking around, were you?” Wooyoung cooed. “I distinctly remember your father telling you to go play in your room or something- you were always hiding in the corners.”
“I don’t sneak around now-”
“I saw you shadowing Mingi earlier,” he winked at you and you pouted. “Why do you keep following him around?”
You looked away from Wooyoung’s searching gaze but found yourself caged when he continued to stare at you, waiting for an answer. You sighed deeply.
“Because he’s either hiding something from me or he hates me and I need to know what it is.”
You did not miss Wooyoung’s subtle eye roll but only you were aware of how Mingi was trying to avoid your eyes, would look at you when you thought you didn’t know he was, and appeared to be about to say something but would then stop. It was a game of push and pull now, and you were losing.
���That’s not it,” Wooyoung shook his head. “It’s probably something else.”
“I’m just confused, Wooyoung. Is it because Erebos told me about Mingi’s first love? Is that a topic the demon should have avoided? Or is it because…”
Because you continued to tread on dangerous lines with Erebos. And because Mingi could probably see some of it himself- after all, how much could Erebos push him back into their subconscious? Was it making Mingi confused because it always used to be the other way round?
“Erebos, huh?” Wooyoung tsk-ed. “If your father saw you today…”
You glared at him. “He’d be proud of me for running away and making it alive. And proud that I’m tolerating you lot.”
“Isn’t it us tolerating the human?” Wooyoung wondered out loud and you threw the nearest object- a flask- at him, which he caught, grinning. “I can tell you he’s not avoiding you on purpose. Something must be bothering him. He couldn’t hate you even if he tried.”
You looked at the healer. “Why?”
“Why don’t you ask him that?” Wooyoung got up and began to clean the mess, tossing you a washcloth so you could help. “He’s not always like this. He looks like something is eating him up.”
Wooyoung wasn’t wrong. Over the course of the past few days, while you and Erebos only grew friendlier- the demon even more teasing and reckless than ever, you and Mingi had also settled into something calm and… cosy. Where Erebos was a literal manifestation of shadows and being with him felt dark and thrilling, Mingi radiated warmth like none other- his voice grounded you and being with him washed a sense of tranquillity over you. You did not know what you craved more, especially because Erebos had been busier recently and you spent more time with Mingi.
Mingi didn’t talk about whatever you and Erebos discussed that night in the graveyard, but his smile had become kinder as if he himself was grateful that you didn’t run away from him. You wondered how many people ran away from him simply because of the demon inside him- he, too, must have been hurt because of the looks of fear or disgust he received. You recalled a couple of days ago when you were watching him trim the plants surrounding the house and he had looked so shy that it made your heart ache unexpectedly-
“Don’t look at me like that, y/n.” 
“Like what?”
“Like how you look at Erebos. As if he’s everything you’ve ever wanted.”
“But-”
“I just can’t take it”, he smiled helplessly. “It makes me want something that isn’t mine.”
Despite this, Mingi didn’t push you away. He continued to find you during the day and engage you in some activity, and even if you two didn’t talk you’d find solace being in each other’s company. However, his casual finger brushes and pats hadn’t escaped your notice. You knew he was very physically affectionate even with Seonghwa and Wooyoung and perhaps this was the same, but he didn’t look at you the way he looked at the others. You knew that well and good.
After cleaning the soot, you went outside for a breather, spotting Mingi at the bank of the river, this time with his feet dipped in the water. He seemed to be enjoying the warm rays of sun, head tipped backwards. Despite your quiet steps, he seemed to have heard the ruffle of grass and motioned for you to join him. You rolled your trousers up a little before sinking your feet into the cool water, grinning to yourself as you settled down.
“Such a nice day today, isn’t it?” You looked up at the fluffy clouds spreading across the sky. “The sun is about to set. I should have joined you earlier.”
“We still have some time,” he smiled. “I heard a little blast inside. Wooyoung again?”
“Me, but it was Wooyoung who messed us up,” you laughed. “Did you manage to find the missing mage?”
“Not yet. I’ve been searching since sunrise but there’s no sign. Erebos might be able to sense the mage better so I’ll leave it to the demon. I’m done for the day.”
“Well, at least the demon is useful for one thing,” you joked and he laughed- he quite enjoyed when you made fun of Erebos and you were glad talking about the demon wasn’t something that made you two awkward anymore. 
“But you should know,” Mingi started, “We don’t work for the Mage Society willingly. It’s something we have to do so they will allow us to live.”
You frowned- that was news to you. “Why?”
“They just don’t like the idea that a human is a mage now,” he looked at you. “You know they’ve always discriminated between pure mages and mages who were once human.”
You were aware that Mingi was once human, however, you were not aware of the circumstances that brought Erebos to possess Mingi. “Can I ask how…”
Mingi seemed to understand and he nodded. “I was simply at the wrong place, at the wrong time. Erebos needed a human vessel who it could coexist with. Not all humans can live with a demon inside them, you know.”
You made an impressed face. “So there was something special about you?”
“You could say. Perhaps I was stronger- maybe physically, maybe mentally. We did have a rough time coexisting in the beginning but we’re used to each other now.”
“And why did Erebos need a human vessel? Because it was cursed?”
Mingi paused and you realised he was wondering if you should have asked that from him. He took a deep breath before he said, “Cursed and exiled from the demon realm, like Seonghwa.”
You were satisfied with his answer. “Do you ever wonder if there was a reason why you had to be the human that Erebos possessed?”
“I do,” he admitted. “Even though we haven’t found any answer yet. I guess it was fate, then. So I could meet the people and be here at this moment?” He looked at you and smiled. “Something like that?”
Before you could respond, his brows furrowed and he brought his hand to the side of your face, his fingers gripping the crevice between your ear and neck as he ran his thumb across your cheekbone. “Were you playing with fire? You’re smudged with soot-”
Perhaps, he noticed the way your eyes opened a fraction wider or your lips parted as if it was suddenly hard to breathe. Perhaps, he could hear the loud thumping of your heart. Or maybe he noticed the way your eyes scanned his face- you could see the browns in his eyes, the shadow his lashes casted over them, the mole under his eye. Maybe he could tell you loved the way his hair fell over his forehead, the dark and blue strands resembling the night sky.
You blinked and waited for him to draw away but he didn’t and it only made you more anxious for what was next. Swallowing once, you barely managed to whisper his name. He only caressed your cheekbone in answer, still seeming to be in a trance as he locked eyes with you. When he started leaning forward, you wondered if your eyes betrayed you in that moment- that he saw that you wanted this. Wanted him-
He paused when your noses almost brushed. “I-I shouldn’t-”
“It’s okay,” you breathed, locking eyes. “It’s… okay.”
What was okay, he wondered? The fact that he had come back to his senses before he did anything? Or was it an approval to go ahead and do whatever he wanted to do at that moment? 
Mingi looked down and smiled a bit- whatever this was… it had been such a long time since he felt like this- like his nerves were on fire. When he found you smiling shyly as well, he couldn’t take it- he planted a kiss on your cheek, patting it once before saying he was heading inside, leaving you wondering how during that moment, not once did you think about the demon inside him.
Not once.
—----------------------
Later that night, when you were fixing up a loose thread on your dress in your room, you heard two sharp knocks- a sound you were very familiar with now. Somehow, Erebos and you had come up with this- if your door was slightly open, he could knock and come in, otherwise he would take it as a sign to bug off. It also applied to you and being on the end of a shut door was not a pleasant feeling, but you two were also crossing these boundaries now- opening a shut door just a fraction to check if the other was okay.
“What you doing?” Erebos sang as it entered, making itself home on your bed. You hummed in response- the demon could clearly see what you were doing. Breaking the thread with your teeth, you secured the stitch and put it aside, folding your arms as you shook your head at how comfortable the demon looked.
“I thought I made it clear that I don’t want you in my bed.”
Erebos scoffed. “The seat is not empty.”
You glanced towards the seat- you did not remember putting a bunch of clothes on it. You narrowed your eyes at the demon but decided to let it go. “Did you find the mage?”
“Just returned,” the demon answered, “Was my little bird waiting for me?”
“As if,” you tsk-ed, looking away- of course you were. You just wouldn’t ever admit it. After all, you waited all day for this part of the night.
And all night to see Mingi-
“I can taste the lies in the air, human,” the demon licked its lips. “Tell me… why did you ask Mingi about why I possessed him today?”
So it had been listening. You gulped, wondering if the demon had also witnessed the look in your eyes when Mingi was so close-
“I didn’t mean to ask,” you glared at it- Erebos knew you never probed. You never even asked it, save for that one time you did and got the silent treatment. 
“I know,” the demon’s gaze softened for a mere second before it darkened. “And why did you look at Mingi like that? I thought I made it clear that you cannot look at anyone else that way?”
You rolled your eyes even though your heart sank. You did feel guilty, but somehow… it felt alright. “I can look at whoever I want whatever way I want.”
“Oh? Can you now?” Erebos chuckled deeply and you passed it an annoyed look, getting up to put your clothes back in the cupboard. 
However, you did not expect to find it standing- no, towering over you when you turned around- you hadn’t even heard the demon move. You shut your eyes as you tried to calm your heart, but-
But the demon’s hands cupped your face so softly that for a second, you wondered if it was Mingi instead. Only upon opening your eyes and spotting the stars in its irises confirmed that it was indeed the demon.
Erebos looked conflicted as it scanned your eyes. Your gaze softened too- it had been a while since the demon looked at you like you were not a meal- an inside joke now. It reminded you of your first and only kiss, in the hills when the demon had nearly lost control. You leaned into the demon’s touch when it caressed your face and saw the telltale signs of a smile on its lips.
“Can you not look at Mingi with these eyes, little bird?” Erebos almost sounded hurt. “I don’t like it.”
“Erebos, I-”
“No,” the demon shook its head. “I don’t want to know- just let me…”
If the demon was going to ask for permission, it must have decided against it because it crashed its lips on yours, earning a surprised groan from you but you immediately melted into the kiss, clutching at the demon’s shirt. Erebos leaned down to kiss you better and it was just like the first time again, making you breathless and your heart ached as it yearned to be closer to the demon in every way possible. 
You broke apart, already out of breath but Erebos’s lips were back on your skin, peppering kisses all the way down your jaw to your neck and then back up, looking at you once- perhaps to make sure if you were okay- before diving back in to kiss your lips. You responded more eagerly this time, your arms wrapping around its neck and the demon took that sign to pick you up, earning a giggle from you and you absolutely loved the way the demon smiled at you- it was pure. You didn’t doubt the demon’s intentions once and this just strengthened your beliefs. 
Erebos placed you on the bed- not so gently this time- and you both laughed a bit, taking a moment to simply look at the other. You crawled on the demon’s lap, its arms going to hold your waist, and ran a hand through the soft strands of its hair- Mingi’s hair- that you so loved. You traced the edges of its face- Mingi’s face- and kissed the mole under its eye-
How could you kiss him and not see Mingi?
Erebos seemed to notice the hesitation in your eyes and you thought the demon looked sad for a moment before it craned its neck to kiss you again, slower this time, deeper, as if it wanted to say a lot but didn’t have the words for it. You kissed the demon back just like that, making out endlessly with its hands everywhere on your body until you heard it suppress a little groan. You drew back for a second but then it pushed you back on the bed, getting on top of you and-
Pressing its thigh between your legs as it kissed you almost hungrily- the sudden shift almost made you a little dizzy and you cupped its face, breaking apart-
“Erebos- tell me your name, please-”
The demon kissed you again, slowing down just a notch and you moaned into the kiss, loving as its hands found your bare skin, loving the way it rocked its body against yours, loving the way its plump lips tasted on yours, loving the gasp that left its mouth-
Not Erebos, your mind screamed and you broke apart for breath, noticing even in the faint light of the lamp that the eyes no longer had stars in it. 
Mingi had taken over.
Mingi seemed to understand that you knew, yet, when he drew in and brushed his nose against you, you almost moaned. You became hyper aware of his hand on your bare waist where your shirt had lifted, of his other hand squeezing your neck gently as if all his self-control lay there, of his chest rocking against yours as he took deep breaths. This time, you were the one who pulled him in and swallowed all his hesitation as you kissed him, with a dreadful realisation that perhaps, you had failed to keep the boundaries, the distinctions clear. Mingi didn’t seem to mind though- he kissed you back just as enthusiastically, welcoming your tongue in his mouth.
Just as Mingi groaned in pleasure into the kiss, it changed into one of pain and he drew back abruptly. You noticed how his eyes blackened altogether as he clutched his head. You got up into a sitting position and leaned towards him to help but he pushed you away-
“Y/n, run.”
“No, Mingi- please-”
“No,” Mingi clenched his jaw and buried his head in the bed. You realised it was Erebos and the demon must be so, so angry- not only with Mingi, but you. You caressed his head despite his constant warnings and held him.
“Erebos,” you almost cried. “Please. Not like this.”
Mingi calmed down almost completely and you wondered if he had lost consciousness before he raised his head and you saw the stars in his angry eyes as it looked at you questioningly.
“I’m sorry,” you cried, wiping your eyes. “I don’t have anything else to say.”
Erebos was silent and you wondered if the demon hadn’t heard you until you noticed the shadows seeping out of it and spreading in the room. You squeezed the demon’s hand, locking eyes with it. “Look at me, Erebos.”
“Why?”
A strangled cry left you when you heard how broken, how devastated the demon sounded. Erebos buried its head in your lap and shadows continued to seep out of its body and you dared to touch the edge of one, drawing away with a cry- it seemed to burn. 
“Erebos?” You caressed its head. “Erebos, please-”
“Go away,” the demon simply said. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
You pursed your lips, looking towards the door when you heard the sound of footsteps- it was Seonghwa and he looked utterly surprised. He rushed towards you and said, “You need to get away from Erebos- the shadows are not safe right now.”
“I can’t leave Erebos like this,” you cried. 
“Take her before I hurt her,” Erebos said, almost falling limp and you snatched your arm away when Seonghwa tried to grab it.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t leave them like this- both Mingi and Erebos,” you told him and he looked conflicted. You shut your eyes and hugged their body, not minding the way your skin burned wherever it came in contact with the shadows. You hummed a melody that your father used to sing at your bed and Seonghwa gasped, drawing away from you-
The shadows were not hurting you- not anymore.
He watched both your and Mingi’s body melt into each other as you lost consciousness, the shadows no longer in the air. He made sure the two of you were breathing and were alright before he left the room and found his way to the kitchen, slumping on a chair-
Maybe it was time- never had Erebos been able to control its magic from hurting someone until this moment. It was as if even though the demon had lost consciousness, it still knew to protect you.
Seonghwa smiled at the two bodies that clung to each other, as if providing comfort. His smile was sad though- it looked like the curse would soon break. 
It was going to be a mess.
—---------------------
You woke up with every muscle in your body aching as if you had overused it. Groaning, you turned in the bed, biting your lips to swallow the cry of pain that would have left you. You blinked a few times, trying to recall just what you had done last night to be this tired-
Mingi.
You got up with immense effort- he was not here anymore and it was dark outside- just how long had you been sleeping? You noticed the glass of water and a potion next to you, a note attached in Wooyoung’s handwriting that said ‘you better drink this before you move’. Knowing Wooyoung’s potion would probably do you some good, you drank the bitter pink liquid before exiting the room-
It was so, so dark outside. Unnaturally dark and you could barely see anything. With a dreadful realisation, you started towards Mingi’s room, letting your hand against the wall guide you towards the end of the hall. You found a faint light from the room and when you entered, you first saw Seonghwa leaning towards something, a white flame lighting the lone candle in the corner-
Seonghwa was caressing something- someone. Mingi. 
Seonghwa’s head turned when a strangled cry left your mouth and he urged you to wait outside. You stood like a little kid behind the door until he urged you to follow him to Wooyoung’s room, who was going through some notes.
“I can’t find anything,” Wooyoung sighed in defeat, slumping on the couch. “Don’t you remember if something like this has happened in the past?”
“Each curse is unique,” Seonghwa simply said as if that explained everything.
“What’s happening?” You tried not to sound frantic but failed. “Why are they like this?”
“Do you remember what happened before you passed out?” Seonghwa asked.
“I… I was trying to calm them down- Mingi and Erebos.” you recalled. “I was humming a song my father taught me and then… why did I pass out? Was it because of their magic?”
“You could have died, y/n,” Seonghwa shook his head. “Somehow, they protected you with their magic, even when they lost control. Do you know that’s the first time they’ve ever been able to do that?”
Your heart sank- you recalled all the stories Mingi and Erebos had told you about not being able to protect the people they loved when they lost control and the shadows burned them- they burned you a bit too but when you hummed…
“They must have felt you even when they were far gone,” Wooyoung smiled sadly. “I don’t know if I should be pleased about it though…”
“Well, we have got to do something about Mingi and Erebos,” Seonghwa said. “I wouldn’t suggest you going to them right now- it might not work in your favour.”
You didn’t quite understand what they were getting at. “But it happened because of me. I… I knew Erebos wouldn’t like it if I became closer to Mingi, but…”
“It was bound to happen sooner or later,” Wooyoung muttered and Seonghwa looked at him in warning but he shook his head. “She should know.”
“What now?” Your voice quivered.
“You should know that it’s not your fault,” Wooyoung said gently. “The demon was cursed. Did they ever tell you why?”
You shook your head in denial and Wooyoung motioned at Seonghwa to continue. “Ages ago, Erebos was a high status demon in their realm. The Lord of Shadows. Erebos was powerful enough to control other demons, and though it had better things to do than involve itself in petty mischief, it was also powerful enough to undo their damage- mainly human possession which was very rampant at that time. One day… Erebos came across some demon who was violating the demon code- we are not allowed to leave evidence of demon possession, but that demon wanted to show the world that it could do whatever it pleased.
“Erebos wasn’t going to involve itself but one thing led to another and since Erebos held the authority, it killed that demon. Turns out the demon was some other high lord’s underling who got pissed and reported it to the court where Erebos was going to receive its judgement.”
“But… it wasn’t Erebos’s fault,” you said and Seonghwa nodded.
“The demons aren’t forgiving. If they forgive, wouldn’t that make them human?” He smiled. “Erebos could have been ‘grounded’, in layman terms, or stripped of his title but demons are a sadistic bunch. They twisted his intentions thinking that the demon ‘pitied’ the human. They cursed him to live inside a human, to feel like a human does, until-”
“Until?” You waited but Seonghwa glanced at Wooyoung now. Your heart sank as you recalled something familiar-
The scroll Mingi had hid under the plank in the hallway.
You got up and went outside, walking almost mechanically towards the end of the hallway and took out the scroll and watched Wooyoung shake his head, confirming your suspicions. You opened it and read it again:
“Once the shadow, once the light 
As one, the two must thrive  
A curse both must fight 
To one’s end, they dive 
For love, with all their might 
Hearts awakened, live alive”
“What does it mean?” You went back inside the room and spread the scroll on the table. “They’re clearly talking about Erebos, but…”
“‘A curse both must fight, to one’s end they dive, for love’,” Seonghwa quoted. “They will continue to fight the curse to one’s end because ultimately, only one of them can live inside that body. No matter how much they try to coexist, it’s not possible- this episode they’re having is not their first one but it might be their final one, because…”
“‘For love’,” Wooyoung’s smile was sad. “Once the two fall in love with the same person… the curse will break. It’s twisted because a demon is not supposed to feel those emotions but Erebos can feel them now, because of Mingi. Mingi has fallen in love a few times in the past centuries but Erebos never gave in, until…”
It couldn’t be.
“This does not make any sense, it’s stupid,” you almost spat. “Is the curse even real or was it just to mock Erebos? And Erebos is a demon, it cannot love-”
You recalled that night in the graveyard well and good. You recalled what Erebos said about wanting you, wanting to be with you. Could you not call it love when it did so much for you, waited to be with you, touched you like you could break, kissed you like time was running short?
And Mingi… He told you not to look at him the way you looked at Erebos, like the demon was everything you ever wanted. 
“It… cannot be,” you said, not realising your face was wet and your vision was blurry. “What will happen?”
“We do not know,” Wooyoung patted your back. “Maybe try talking to them. Seonghwa, let’s allow her to. We need to know if this is just another episode or if the curse is breaking- if this might be the end.”
“Why did no one tell me about the curse?” You looked at the two.
“Not our place to tell you, and they have forbidden us to,” Seonghwa shook his head. “We only let you know now because the situation called for it.”
“If I had known-”
“If you had known, it would have still happened anyway,” Wooyoung squeezed your shoulder. “Love is not a feeling you can control.”
You stared into the fire for the longest moment, wishing you could undo everything from the moment you met Mingi and Erebos. You wished you had not decided to stay, nor found a family in this odd group. You wished you hadn’t fallen for a demon and then the human who coexisted in one body. But no matter how much you cursed yourself over it, it was no use. 
Love was not a feeling you could control.
You had long since stopped crying, now in a state of numbness. Seonghwa and Wooyoung were patiently waiting for you to make a decision.
“I’m going to try talking to them,” you swallowed the choking feeling in your throat. “I can’t give up- not like this.”
“You’re strong,” Wooyoung smiled proudly. “And I think only you could have done this- make a demon fall for you. How crazy is that?”
You laughed at that, hiding your face as it settled in and a sob left your body. Wooyoung was quick to get up and rub your back.
“It’s tragic, I know, but it has been very painful for them to coexist in one body,” he told you. “We helped in any way we could but it was never enough. I think they found comfort in you- both Mingi and Erebos. It’s going to be okay, don’t lose faith.”
“I don’t want to lose them,” you cried. “I don’t want to lose either of them. It’s very selfish of me, but-”
“We’ve grown quite attached to them too,” Seonghwa admitted. “But we can’t avoid it. It’s cruel, but it is the way it is.”
You nodded, preparing yourself for what was next, hoping for a miracle that you knew might not come.
—------------------------
It was dark and it was cold. There was no way out. The darkness hugged Mingi and the cold settled in his bones. There was not a sound- not even of his own breath. The shadows were endless.
Mingi wondered how he had gotten here but there was no answer. It was just the way it was, how it happened. There was no one to blame, no one to point fingers at. He had learned not to question how cruel the hands of fate could be. Still, he couldn’t help but wonder if it really had to be this way.
Mingi called Erebos’s name, hoping to find solace in the darkness of their subconsciousness but Erebos seemed to have given in to the void as well. So Mingi waited, not alone but so lonely. He waited for Erebos to wake up, for a miracle to happen-
“Mingi? Can you hear me?”
It was your voice, so distant that he wondered if he was imagining it. 
“Erebos? Mingi? Please, talk to me.”
No- it was real. Their names were being called. Mingi looked around, blindly thrashing around in hopes of finding Erebos, wondering if the demon could hear it too. 
As Mingi started gaining a bit of consciousness, he could make out another figure in the void- Erebos’s figure- he did not know if the demon had a body of its own but whenever the two interacted in their subconscious, it was like they were looking in a mirror. The only difference had always been in their eyes. 
“Erebos,” Mingi nudged the demon’s body, sitting with its head buried between its knees, arms wrapped around itself as if that could protect the demon from what was ahead. “Wake up.”
The demon didn’t budge and Mingi heard your voice call for them again. He was pretty sure Erebos was ignoring it on purpose now. “Hey, I know you can hear me and her. Look at me.”
The demon finally gave an indication of not having lost it completely by tapping its fingers- a sign Mingi would have missed had he not been paying attention. Mingi sighed deeply. “How long are you going to be like this?”
“I’m just wondering…” Erebos finally said, not looking up. “If this is the end.”
Mingi was wondering too- it had never been so dark here. He could feel their magic getting out of control, nothing like they had ever experienced before. No matter how much he tried to get back into his consciousness, it wasn’t working. 
“The curse, huh?” Mingi shook his head. “So you’re in love with y/n? I thought you were incapable of love.”
“I thought I was too,” Erebos finally looked up. “Until I found myself protecting her with all my might when you kissed her and we lost control.”
Mingi looked away- it was his fault too. The first time the demon fell in love and he had to be there and mess things up-
“I know what you’re thinking,” Erebos smiled. “I’m not sure I could have fallen in love if it weren’t for you.”
“What do you mean?”
“I am a demon, Mingi,” Erebos scoffed. “I may only be feeling these human emotions because I live within a human body now.”
“That is not how this works, and you know it,” Mingi tsk-ed. 
“You’re the one who insisted that demons do not have a heart,” Erebos tsk-ed back. 
“I was wrong. Seonghwa is also a demon- he would not have been helping us for centuries if he did not have a heart. He never demanded anything in return. And you…” Mingi shook his head. “I know you blame yourself over what happened when I first fell in love. It was not your fault, and if you were a demon, you wouldn’t have been wallowing in guilt. You would have enjoyed my misery.”
“Who says I didn’t?”
“Don’t pretend to be heartless now when you visit the grave every year and pray to god knows who,” Mingi said and Erebos pursed its lips- it had always tried to force Mingi the furthest back in their consciousness whenever it did that, but it looked like the demon may have slipped. “My point is, you don’t love y/n because of me. You love her because she looked at you- from the beginning. She didn’t care that you were a demon. And you love her because you have a heart of your own, no matter how… dark or ugly it may be.”
Erebos laughed at that and Mingi shared a grin as well, silence settling once again. “Okay, you’re right. We wouldn’t be here right now if I wasn’t in love with her. And you’re in love with her too.”
Mingi smiled sadly. “How could I not be in love with her when she is the way she is?”
“Little bird,” Erebos smiled fondly and Mingi was taken aback by the display of those emotions in the demon’s eyes. Its smile fell when your voice rang in the void again, calling for them both, begging for them to come back. “I know I wished I was never cursed to be in a human body, but I can’t say that I regret it now that I know what it is like to be loved.”
Mingi felt his heart sink. “What are you getting at?”
“I shouldn’t have been in this body in the first place,” Erebos sounded determined. “I do not deserve to choose to live on and kill you in the process.”
Mingi was taken aback by the sudden declaration. “I know only one of us can make it out alive but… I’m only human. I will grow old and die anyway. If you choose to live… I don’t think I would mind, I…” Mingi laughed in disbelief. “I can’t believe I’m willingly giving you the choice to live in my body and kill me in the process, but Erebos… that human loves you. You deserve to be loved too.”
Erebos shook its head. “I do not deserve to be loved, but I am thankful for the love I have received. I cannot go back and choose to live. The human loves you too, Mingi. I think she deserves a human, not a demon by her side for the rest of her life.”
“But-”
“No buts,” Erebos got up. “She’s human, Mingi. I would ruin her. And even if I love her with all my heart, I wouldn’t be able to live when she dies- because I will outlive her. I would rather kill myself than see her dead. You humans… you’re used to the notion of death. You understand that you grow old and die. I do not.”
Erebos raised its hands and the shadows gathered in its palms. Mingi took a step back, almost panicking. “What are you doing?”
“Putting an end to this for once and for all,” Erebos announced.
“Wait- wait,” Mingi pounced on him, surprising the demon as they fell. “You don’t get to go just like this. You can’t do this to her- you have to tell her.”
“I can’t face her again-”
“No, you listen to me,” Mingi groaned in frustration. “You can’t do this without saying goodbye.”
“If you think my mind will change once I see her, you’re wrong.”
“I know it won’t,” Mingi shook his head. “But she deserves a goodbye too.”
Erebos thought about it and Mingi could see the doubt in the demon’s eyes. Before Erebos could make a decision, Mingi grabbed Erebos’s hands, the shadows looping around his arm now.
“What do you think you are doing?” Erebos tried snatching its hands away but Mingi smiled, forcing the shadows to shift to himself and-
Forcing Erebos into consciousness.
You felt the shift in the air instantly and watched Erebos lift its head and look at you, almost in disbelief and confusion. A short sob left you as you knelt down next to him, bringing your hands to the demon’s face but hesitating, letting them hover until Erebos relaxed.
“You’re… back,” you caressed its face. “Are you okay?”
Erebos didn’t say anything, simply leaned forward to wrap its arms around you as if it, too, had been afraid. You smiled- this was the first time Erebos actually hugged you. You looped your own arms around its neck and the demon shifted under you, burying its face in the crook of your neck and staying like that for the longest time, not saying a word, simply relishing the feeling-
“Erebos,” you finally whispered. “What happened?”
Erebos didn’t respond, instead nudged your neck with its nose and you would have thought the demon was just having a moment until you felt something wet on your neck and you drew back to see-
The demon was crying.
“What’s the matter?” Your heart broke at the way Erebos was looking at you. Its hands were shaking as they cupped your face and caressed your skin, scanning you as if it was memorising the way you looked. “Erebos, please, tell me what’s going on.”
The demon only smiled, tears streaking down its face. You felt your heart sink in the worst possible way, looking around to see the shadows still wild around you. “The curse… it hasn’t broken yet, has it? Is Mingi okay?”
“He’s okay,” Erebos assured you but you couldn’t relax.
“Is the curse going to break?”
The demon’s silence was enough. You took a deep breath. “Tell me how to undo everything. I will leave. I don’t want you two to live like this-”
“It’s already done,” Erebos wiped the tears from your eyes. “It’s going to end soon, little bird.”
“What do you mean?” You cried out. “What’s going to happen?”
“It’s been an honour to have been loved by you.” 
“No, no, please,” you gripped the demon’s hands. “What are you doing?”
“I was going to leave but Mingi forced me back here so I could… say goodbye,” Erebos laughed a little. “I think it was wise of him to do so.”
“Leave where?” You whispered and you heard a shuffle of sound behind you, Wooyoung and Seonghwa now present in the room. Erebos nodded at them, mouthing a ‘thank you’. Seonghwa took a deep breath, turning around and facing the white flame while Wooyoung put one hand over his heart and one over Seonghwa’s shoulder.
“I was never meant to be here,” Erebos kissed your forehead, lingering. “This is how it is supposed to end. You deserve to be loved by a human, not a demon.”
“That makes no sense,” you let out a short laugh. “I… Please, don’t do this. Tell me how to make it better- there must be a loophole. It doesn’t have to end with one of you-”
You couldn’t say it, hiding your face in Erebos’s lap as you cried your heart out, the demon caressing your body. The sobs racked through your body and you felt like you were in physical pain- you simply couldn’t seem to catch your breath. There was so much you wanted to say to Erebos, so much you wished to tell the demon but you couldn’t form the words.
“I don’t want to leave seeing you cry,” Erebos’s voice was filled with sadness. “I want to see you smiling before I leave. Please, little bird? I don’t have much time.”
You willed everything in you to tone down your sobs and got up, the demon shaking its head in amusement at your state. “What a mess. Still so pretty.”
Erebos tucked your hair back. “It’s been… a long life in this human body. I’ve never felt alive, not once, until I met you. There’s so much I want to thank you for. I’m not even sure if it’s because I am in a human body that I feel all this. Maybe if I was the Lord of Shadows, I still would have found you and still would have loved you. I feel like I was meant to be here.”
“Stop being so sappy,” you pouted and the demon chuckled, wiping the fresh stream of tears from your eyes. You shut your eyes, memorising the way the demon’s skin felt- cold. Too cold to be human. When the demon hugged you again, you memorised the pattern of its breathing- uneven. It had always been irregular. And when the demon kissed your cheek, you memorised the way it felt- like a feather. When the demon joined its forehead with yours, you noted in your heart the sound of its breath against yours. And when the demon kissed you on your lips, you tucked that feeling into the deepest corner of your heart- the feeling of being enveloped in the safest of shadows. 
You stayed like that for a few moments before its body shook and you finally opened your eyes. You could see the light in Erebos’s eyes fade away and it smiled, struggling to keep upright. You sucked in your tears, remembering that Erebos wished for you to smile. You patted your lap and the demon lied down, looking up at you.
“Will you tell me your name now?” You asked.
The demon smiled. “It’s nothing much.”
“Just tell me your name,” you glared at it and the demon laughed. You memorised the sound of it as well.
“Tirich,” it said. “My name is Tirich. It means darkness- or shadow.”
“Tirich,” you called and the demon shut its eyes, taking in a deep breath. “Such a beautiful name. Tirich,” you repeated again, kissing its forehead. 
“Y/n,” it called and you shut your eyes, willing yourself not to cry at the way it said your name. “My little bird.” You laughed and Tirich took one of your hands in its own, while your other caressed its head. “Can you sing me that song again? Before I go to sleep?”
You nodded. Tirich looked over at the healer and the demon still hanging by. “Come here, you two. Stop hanging like bats in the corner.”
You laughed at the duo, looking as messy as you with tear-stained faces and trembling hands. They came to sit near Tirich and the demon looked fondly at them for once, making Wooyoung shake his head.
“Not how I imagined you’d go, but this is better,” he grinned. Tirich grinned back and looked at Seonghwa, tsk-ing. 
“Remind me why they kicked you out of the demon realm again?”
“Shut up,” Seonghwa muttered and everyone laughed at that. “At least I accept that this is the way I am. You’re still wondering if you’re looking at us with heart eyes because of Mingi.”
“It’s definitely Erebos- Tirich,” Wooyoung smiled as he corrected. “I must say I’m disappointed. We’ve spent centuries with you but you go ahead and tell your name to the girl you just met-”
“You wish you were me,” you stuck out your tongue at the healer and he did the same. Tirich coughed a little, drawing everyone’s attention back.
“I’m going now,” the demon said. “Please… sing me the song.”
You kissed the demon’s forehead one last time, whispering in its ear that you loved every moment you got to be with it and will never forget it. You hummed the song, caressing the demon’s face, your voice starting to tremble as you felt the shadows around you recede back and back until nothing was left. You didn’t stop- not when Seonghwa and Wooyoung hugged each other and cried. Not when the demon’s body went limp in your lap. The tears fell and you continued singing until the sobs took over when nothing was left and you felt the body in your lap move again.
Mingi was back.
Mingi let you cry with your face buried in his chest for the longest time until you passed out from exhaustion. He tucked you in his bed and he finally sat down, feeling the most empty even though his heart felt full for once. It was as if a part of him was gone now. He stared at his palm, so very human. He felt weak, and he couldn’t make it to the bed- he passed out as well, though Wooyoung came right on time, knowing it would be tough for Mingi to use a body that was fully human without the strength of a demon that had braced it for centuries.
The healer tucked Mingi beside you, shaking his head at the irony- two humans who lost a demon that they loved in their own twisted ways. 
—----------------------
“I thought I said I wanted this in red and black, not blue and black.”
“I distinctly remember you saying how blue was a nice colour-”
“For you!” Wooyoung groaned. “I wanted my scarf in red and black!”
“Well…” you considered for a moment, looking down at the bundle of your knitted scarfs. “My bad?”
Seonghwa, who was watching you two bicker, snorted loudly, making Wooyoung jump up and down in frustration and you promised between breathless laughter that you would make him another scarf. Seonghwa shook his head. “We know you’re obsessed with the colour blue, but I want mine in pink and white. Not blue and white.”
You pursed your lips, muttering, “Noted.” The duo nodded at you before continuing to set the table for dinner. At that moment, Mingi came from outside, having collected fresh oranges from the trees not far from your house. You waved at him and he smiled, placing the basket on the kitchen counter before hopping to you and planting a kiss on your temple.
“That’s mine, right?” Mingi pointed at the blue and black scarf in your lap.
“You like it?”
Mingi nodded and you handed him the scarf, smiling at how his eyes lit up. He went to try it on in front of the mirror near the door and you gathered your wool, getting up. One of the balls of wool rolled down and before you could grab it, it continued to roll down endlessly across the living room and you groaned.
“Seonghwa, can you please make this house stand straighter? Look at that,” you pointed at the ball of wool still unrolling, bumping into whatever was in the way and changing directions. “The elevation is all messed up.”
“I’ll see what I can do,” Seonghwa rolled his eyes. You made a face before gathering the thread and following it to see where it unrolled off to, sitting under the stairs now. You picked it up and started rolling it, looking up and halting entirely- 
On the table where you collected your candles, one of them was burning with a black flame- you wondered if you were imagining it but you took a closer look, in awe at how dark the flame was- you had never seen a flame that was shades of black. You picked the candle up, running your finger over the flame but it didn’t burn. You wondered if this was one of Wooyoung’s strange objects he used for healing-
You frowned, putting your finger right over the flame and feeling the familiarity of the flame, no, the shadow. 
It couldn’t be.
“Uh, Seonghwa!” You almost screamed, making everyone look at you. “Is this your flame?”
Before Seonghwa could even make his way to you, you were rushing to him, surprised when the air didn’t make the flame budge, not one bit. You stopped when you reached them, blowing at the flame and everyone collectively gasped when it didn’t blow out. 
“Wait, is this you?” Wooyoung looked at Seonghwa who shook his head furiously.
“My flame is white- you’ve seen it.”
“That’s not me. Mingi?”
“Isn’t this-” Mingi narrowed his eyes. “Douse it with water.”
“No,” you hid the candle away from him but Wooyoung was quick to grab the glass of water and spill it on the candle, making you shout and almost cry but you recovered when you saw the flame was still burning in its full glory. You settled the candle on the table and everyone stared at it.
“Should I say it?” Seonghwa looked at everyone. “It’s a shadow flame. It has to be Tirich.”
Your heart sank. “How?”
“I don’t know,” Seonghwa smiled in disbelief, looking at Mingi. “You tell.”
Mingi poked his tongue in his cheek, a clear indication that he knew something. You waited for him to spill but he groaned, overwhelmed by everyone’s questioning gaze. “Look, it’s something Tirich said long ago as a joke- I didn’t know the demon could actually do it.”
“So it’s Tirich?”
“I’m not sure,” Mingi touched the flame. “Feels like it but I don’t feel its presence, you know?” Seonghwa nodded in agreement. “Maybe the demon gathered all its remaining energy to be this undying-” Mingi pressed his fingers on the wick of the candle, the flame disappearing but reappearing right when he pulled his fingers back, “-stubborn flame.”
Wooyoung cackled, clapping his hands in amusement. “It’s something Tirich would do. Just can’t leave us alone, can it?”
You laughed, nodding, happy tears leaving your eyes as you watched the flame burn endlessly, the candle wax not even melting. Mingi patted your back and the two of you shared a grin, a sense of relief settling over you.
The candle was placed on the fireplace mantel by you. You insisted that this was Tirich’s favourite spot though Wooyoung argued that it was the roof but you refused to give in. This was where you had first talked to Tirich and this was where you met every night. Once in a while, someone would try to see if the flame would budge- mostly Wooyoung again. He would try water, salt, everything in his book but the flame seemed to be immortal. Sometimes, when you watched it as you thought of Erebos, you could swear it flickered in response. You could swear it burned brighter whenever Mingi and you watched it together with the fondest memories of the demon in your hearts. 
It didn’t hurt anymore, not like it did earlier. It was like the demon was still with you, in the form of that flame, watching over you. Whenever you felt like crying, you recalled how Tirich said it wanted to see you smile, always. So you never cried, at least not at your favourite spot where the candle stood. You only cried in Mingi’s arms who was always there for you, so loving and caring, so warm. He understood that you missed the demon- he, too, did. He had to cope not only emotionally but physically as well, so you focused your energy on trying to make it easier for him as well.
You learned how to etch on metal and with the help of Seonghwa, you created a candle stand for ‘Tirich’s candle’, as you all called it. It was a beautiful shade of silver and you etched a phrase on it that you would always remember. When you showed it off to everyone, they loved your idea and agreed the candle looked better with the new stand. You took to decorating the mantle next, everyone leaving a little something that they had associated with Tirich on it- a small bottle that Wooyoung used for storing their potion, a piece of mirror Seonghwa had brought from the demon realm where sometimes he could see his home, and the blue ribbon Mingi had tied the scroll with- the scroll which had turned to ashes the moment the curse broke.
You stared at the finished product now that the mantle was full of things surrounding the candle, your heart full as you read the etching on the candle stand.
Hearts Awakened, Live Alive.
2K notes · View notes
tanoraqui · 11 months ago
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Dungeon Meshi Liveblog: Golems, Orcs, & loser party that got TPKed by bugs (<3)
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He's so competent, I love him. I really appreciate that post pointing out that this whole party is pretty near the top of the game in terms of genuine competency at adventuring. It's hard to tell when we rarely see other adventurers.
Just a few pages later, Senshi seamlessly takes out 3 golems on his own!
Water fountain shaped like a lion head!
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Senshi has just been single-handedly keeping the dungeon from getting so dangerous that the Elves get to bully their way in, huh. Do you think dungeon experts have been wondering what's taking so long, and will one day find out that it's this one weird dwarf. I hope so.
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I like the dragon being so goat-like.
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HUZZAH!
Side note: I think an ideal live action Senshi would be played by Nick Offerman.
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Marcille and the orc chieftain fighting while Senshi pointedly makes bread gives me such "The Last Supper" vibes - that is, the song in Jesus Christ Superstar. Two people having an increasingly vicious argument over dinner while everyone else in the room says increasingly loudly, "Wow, this food is great!!"
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HEY LOOK THE NEXT CHAPTER STARTS WITH MY MAN!!
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I'm sure this isn't novel analysis but man I like how directly Kabru's party mirrors the original Touden party. (Side note: I wish each party had a name that wasn't just the name of the party leader...)
Toudens':
6 members
3 fighters (Laiois, Shuro, Namari)
2 mages, 1 for damage (Marcille) and 1 for healing (Falin)
1 lockpick (Chilchuck)
2 long-lived (1 dwarf, 1 elf)
4 short-lived (3 humans, 1 halffoot)
3 men, 3 women
4 tall, 2 short
1 Easterner
leader is a mall tallman fighter
lockpick is halffoot
1 mage is tallman, 1 is long-lived magic-heavy race
1 fighter is a dwarf
Kabru's:
6 members
3 fighters (Kabru, Kuro, Daya)
2 mages, 1 for damage (Rin) & 1 for healing (Holm)
1 lockpick (Mickbell)
2 long-lived (1 dwarf, 1 gnome)
4 short-lived (2 humans, 1 halffoot, 1 kobold)
4 men, 2 women
3 tall, 3 short
1 Easterner
leader is a male tallman fighter
lockpick is halffoot
1 mage is tallman, 1 is long-lived magic-heavy race
1 fighter is a dwarf
A) it's obviously a solid party composition in terms of classes, and playing into D&D stereotypes (born of Middle Earth, as many D&D stereotypes are) of correlations between PC race and class.
B) Ryoko Kui was like, "There are going to be PARALLELS in this story and you are going to APPRECIATE THEM", and she was so goddamn right. Subtle themes are great but you know what's even better? Like 5 different really overt themes that are all happening all the time and interweave so constantly that subtlety is created in the infinite nuances of overlap. Eat or be eaten and to eat is to live is to want and understanding is compassion but it's also violence and we're all incredibly different and we're all incredibly the same and we're all trying to eat or be eaten in an elaborately connected web of life, and--
I want an orchestral arrangement of this story.
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I'm not carefully counting all winged lion motifs but I AM going to count the number of Kabru Winks(TM). We're at 3 in this chapter.
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EXQUISITE SMASH CUT
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auraisereigh · 6 months ago
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"For the love now lost, for endless pain"
Chapter 7, Part II
Brennan Sorrengail x Riorson reader Blurb: Upon Star's return to Riorson house she finds back a flicker of hope. wc: 2.1k ☆ SPOILERS FOR THE EMPYREAN SERIES. Actually quite peaceful. Nothing really to note. Let me know if i missed something. Uses pronouns: she/her. i use Star as a nickname as y/n sounds weird, and i'm awful with names.
A/N: Part two! This one is shorter but it sets up some events for the following chapters hehe.
Star's masterlist main masterlist
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I stay by the lake for hours, taking in it's calming nature. It's the first time I've felt some kind of peace in the last month and half, if not longer.
The sun starts to set, making the water seem more magical than it already looks. My magic is still spread out over the lake but it stopped moving, showing that even my magic is at peace. Now that is rare.
By the time the night sky rises I decide it's for the best to go back home. I follow the way of the river back to Riorson house. It's calm, the moon reflecting in the flowing water. There's a part of me that doesn't want to leave, that wants to live in this peace forever.
The guards that guard the gate tell me it's almost midnight upon my arrival. Once I walk in the castle it's almost completely quiet. There is a darkness that falls over the castle at night that's only beaten by the small mage lights that dance in the darkness.
I pass by the mess hall where a few staff are still cleaning and I take some bread with me. I snack on the bread while I make my way to my room. I shut the door and sigh. It will never be easy to walk through the family quarters now that no one's here, now that's it's so quiet and abandoned.
My bed still looks like someone fought a war in it and besides what I cleaned today it's still pretty much a chaotic mess.
I get out of my day clothes and out some grey sweats on with a matching grey shirt, comfortable for sleeping. I lit some candles for light and sit on my bed, finishing the last of the bread. It's then that my eyes fall on my desk. Another meal and two letters, one small, one big.
I walk over to my desk, the meal is a simple spaghetti without cheese, a glass of Cassis juice. I look over at the letters, one is definitely Brennan's. The other has a wax seal that's been torn, I push the two halves together and recognize it as the symbol of House Lindell. I waste no time opening the letter.
Dear miss Riorson,
Its been brought to my attention that you've been wanting to see your brother. At the time that letter was sent that was not possible, I had to protect my own life too. I knew Navarians would come to look whether bother Xaden Riorson and Liam Mairi were here. A few days ago that happened and I highly doubt they will come again any time soon.
With this letter I wanted to Inform you that I have a proposal for you regarding the two boys; I will bring the boys to you, reunite you with your brother but at least once a year during reunification day I will have to borrow the boys to keep up my reputation, they're both to be expected each year at the reunification ball. This is the only time you will have to bring them back to me. Take it or leave it.
You're brother has been in good hands, he's been taken care off and his injuries are slowly healing. He's been resting most of the time, as I advised.
My condolences regarding your family, I cannot imagine how you must be feeling, to lose your family at such a young age. Your father was a great man and I will always be in his debt, now yours. If you need anything let me know. Take your time, the throne is not important right now. Mourning is.
Greets,
Lord Lindell.
Taken. No doubt, if I can have my brother I'm taking it. I put the letter down and try to contain my excitement at seeing my brother again but I cannot help the relief I feel, the pressure that's been taken of my heart.
I look at the second note, easily recognizing Brennan's scribble.
He fought in battles far away,
And never saw the break of day.
Her tears fall softly with the rain,
For love now lost, for endless pain.
B.s
It's all written in Tyrrish, broken tyrrish but still Tyrrish.
Maybe he is not that bad, maybe he truly means what he says. Naolin trusted him and he probably knew his real identity. Then why can't I try that? Maybe i should try to talk to him, hear him out.
Tomorrow. That's a promise.
Taglist: @honethatty12 @smashee0789 @awkardnerd @randomperson1234sblog @bangtanxberm
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electric-hydrangea · 3 days ago
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About Rhinedottir & The Shade of Life
5.6 Spoilers
Here, I'll be explaining Rhinedottir's connection with the Shade of Life and how it's not new information that she devoured the shade. Initially this was a conversation prompted by the question "is Rhinedottir more powerful than a Shade?", so the wording may seem strange. Credit to my partner for writing this - we both did the research & I edited.
My theory on how/why this occurred is that first of all all 3 of the main factions in teyvat have their own underling factions (all factions likely represent the 3 realms)
phanes - shades - angels
nibelung - sovereigns - vishap
either irmin or the unnamed descender - 5 sinners - Khaenri’ahn nobility/mages/take your pick
We have no concrete idea on the powerscaling of the sovereigns, but we at least know by default they are more powerful than archons.
We know very little about the Shade of Life, but what we do know is that Rhinedottir is obsessed with finding the truth of life in this world. Rhinedottir's story is likely man vs nature except in the end she became nature. With Little Witch & The Undying Fire, we've been told this story through an analogy of the Shade of Life being mold. Little Witch is a storybook where each volume is written by a different witch. Rhinedottir writes Vol 3.
Here, we have a script from the bottom of Ipissimus. "Red" is the foundational principle, the philosopher's stone, while "yellow" represents gold and mortal temptation. Yellow is simply bait. Red is the final goal. However, Khaenri'ah would likely seek the truth for gold's sake before turning that truth into a bread production pipeline..."
In the process of the Magnus Opus (in Genshin, an allegory for creating a Descender), Citrinas (yellow, in the above passage) is the step before Rubedo (red, in the above passage)
We can infer Rhinedottir's larger goal has been to create a Descender (the primordial human project and how her work is likely inspired by the adam kadmon). 
If Rubedo represents Descenders  (the wills that have changed the fundamentals of this world),  then what does Citrinas represent and why has Rhinedottir let it blind her?
We know the last thing she left Albedo was the message that she had found the Heart of Naberius. We know that the 5 Sinners abandoned Khaenri'ah after obtaining "world-shattering power". It is likely she is one of the three Sinners pursuing "some sort of perfection" (as said by Skirk)
For anyone out of the loop, Naberius is the name for the Shade of Life, similarly to the Shade of Void/Sustainer is Asmoday and Shade of Time is Istaroth/Tokoyo Ookami/Kairos/Astaroth. The Shade of Death is also known as Ronova. These are all names that come from Ars Goetia. It’s… a lot more complicated than that though.
Clearly she, Rhinedottir, has an incredible curiosity, and she has power seemingly equal to some of the strongest entites in Teyvat, so what stopped her from becoming a Descender?
Albedo says that when Rhinedottir told him to discover the truth of this world, she was just telling him to get a life. AKA saying that the truth of this world is the value of your friends and family.
Lumine also tells us to discover the truth of this world. She spent 500 years without us experiencing Teyvat; she has a deep connection with Teyvat we do not have. She wants Aether to understand why she is so desperate to save these people. This is identical to the Second Descender not understanding why Nibelung wanted to save this world until they experienced it firsthand by meeting the angel.
It's possible that to become a Descender, you must not just have a desire to change the world, but save it instead.
Now, one really interesting bit is what Rhinedottir wrote in the Little Witch and the Undying Fire. I have absolutely no idea what the rest of her volume is about but now that we have this context I think I can understand the mold part more.
"They told her: The more demon kings you kill, the greater your witch's power will grow.
This is, in fact, true.
Then, they encountered a mimic demon king."
There is a lot of emphasis on how this specific demon king is different than the others they've found/
"Her friends recovered, and told the little witch that this was the mimic demon king. It was a species of demon king, in the same taxonomic class as standard demon kings but not in the same order."
This means that they are of the same complexity, but are literally in different places on a hierarchy.
All of the Hexenzirkel use allegory for the divine in this book. Rhinedottir specifically approaches the divine through a scientific lens. I believe that it's not absurd to assume that a mimic demon king is equal to a Shade.
"The little witch discovered that the mold had its own consciousness, and had a power that allowed similar lifeforms to turn into their ideal state. She did not change because she was already very pleased with herself."
Here we see how Rhine stands out against her companions as the only one who does not desire change. Instead, her curiosity pushes her into literally becoming mold herself. Given our allegory, I don't think it's unlikely that this connects to her becoming the Shade of Life. Though she herself has no desire to create change, she would change herself in order to understand the world better
"In the end, the mold committed suicide. The little witch deciphered its way of communicating communications, and as it turned out, the colony experienced dissonance in self-perception and self-dissociation when it looked upon the little witch who had become just like them. The signals they sent had in fact been philosophical speculation "Who is me, and who am I?" Its intelligence was thus much higher than expected."
The mold literally killing itself is really interesting to me. It could imply that on a larger scale, there can only ever be one "mold".  We have multiple cases of this showing up in Teyvat already; Greater Lord Rukkhadevata, Egeria, and Focalors. Egeria somewhat naturally passed down her power, while the other two died so their successors could be free.
Ironically, all three of these gods have connections to the Shade of Life. Canonically Egeria was created by her, and while there's nothing to directly prove Rukkhadevata was created by the Shade of Life, we have motifs like mold, mushrooms,  knowledge, trees of wisdom, and other symbolism that connects the Dendro Archon to the Shade of Life. 
The mimic demon king being mold is also interesting as mold, being a decomposer, is something that HAS to exist in order to facilitate continued life.
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darethshirl · 2 months ago
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rookanis, friends to lovers
The sauce sizzled in its pan, red and redolent, thickening along nicely. Lucanis rubbed the basil in his fingers before adding it to the mix, listening to the scrape of his wooden spoon as he stirred. On his right the pasta pot bubbled merrily, for now not needing supervision. On his left a row of golden garlic bread aired itself out, small bubbles of dough still fizzling on the surface. Everything in order, like a magic trick unfurling on a timely manner.
Truly, a kitchen could be the most peaceful place in the whole wide world. 
"Hello hello—oh! That smells amazing! Whatcha making?"
Lucanis looked over his shoulder. Like the sweet breeze brought in by coy spring weather, Rook stood at the entrance with both hands holding the doorframe, her hair disheveled and limned by sunlight. She looked vibrant and out-of-breath, as if she'd just stepped out of a fight and was ready to jump back into the fray. Which, judging by the state of her armor, she probably had. Her grin was as bright as always, her cheeks flushed and healthy—and her gaze was focused, with wolfhound intensity, on the boiling pot.
"Spaghetti," Lucanis told her, stirring the pasta one last time. Perfect consistency. "And you're just in time. How do you always do that?"
"Just luck, I guess," Rook laughed, and made a beeline for the stove. From up close Lucanis could smell the forest on her, and sour-sweet sweat, and that undefinable scent of reality that made Fade air seem dead and stale in comparison. The whole entirety of her suddenly felt more real than anything in this kitchen, her arm warm and solid as she reached around Lucanis for the garlic bread.
"Ouch!"
"It's hot," Lucanis said, belatedly and mildly reproachfully. But only mildly. He watched Rook wince and yelp and toss the bread from hand to hand, then picked up the pot by the handles with an air of finality. "Table. If you're eating then you're going to do it properly."
"Oh, fine." Rook achieved the dubiously impressive feat of rolling her eyes while stuffing her face, but went to her seat obediently enough. "I don't see what difference it makes. Eating is eating."
Lucanis placed the pot on its dragon-shaped trivet. “We’re not animals.” He forked the pasta over to Rook’s plate, then ladled the piping hot sauce on top. Steam rose up from the dish in a perfect finishing touch. “Respect the food you eat. You never know when it’s going to be your last meal.”
To her credit Rook, now serious, made a game attempt at eating slowly. She wielded her cutlery carefully, contemplated as she chewed that first bite. “Mmm,” she hummed with clear relish, a sound that made warmth and pride travel all the way down Lucanis’s belly, and then she—well. She forgot all about restrain and scarfed down her food, the hunger overcoming her.
Lucanis sighed. “You eat like a wolf,” he said, but there was more amusement than censure in his voice. He wiped his hands on his apron and leaned back against the benchtop, crossing his arms. “I thought they fed you well in those clans of yours. Aren’t the Dalish supposed to be tall and strong?”
“We sure are,” Rook grinned, bunching her arm theatrically to show off her muscles. They were… not inconsiderate, for a mage. Lucanis let his eyes trail over her well-shaped sinew, mostly—partly—out of professional interest. But before he could finish his assessment Rook shrugged, her attention back on her plate. “I grew up in an alienage though, remember? Things weren’t so sweet back then.” She toyed with her next bite, sliding it around the dish to mop up more sauce. “I learned early on to grab onto every morsel I could get, and I suppose some lessons you never really forget.”
“...Right,” Lucanis agreed thoughtfully, caught off-guard. Rook always exuded such an easy, simple happiness, confident and positive no matter what the world threw at her. It was easy to forget she had her own slivers of darkness lurking in her past. Papered over with good mood and a friendly attitude, but there nonetheless. Did she ever think about those memories, Lucanis wondered? Did she bury them or simply accept them, like the sting of a cane that after a while felt like a kiss?
Silence fell upon them, familiar enough at this point to feel comfortable. Lucanis idly watched Rook’s fingers clasped around her fork, the warm brown of her skin glowing under the kitchen’s perennial torchlight. Her curls darkened in contrast, a messy, blue-black halo moving minutely with her motions. With her gaze downturned like that her eyelashes looked unexpectedly delicate, soft and fluttering.
And then she was looking up—she must have noticed Lucanis’s staring—of course she did, you idiot—and then Lucanis was caught in those bright, electric eyes, wide and surprised and impossible to pull away from.
Lucanis’s cheeks flared up with heat. “Uh. Sorry.”
But Rook was smiling at him—a slightly confused smile, but a smile nonetheless, easy and friendly. “What’s up?”
“Sorry. It’s nothing.”
A wrinkle of bemusement creased Rook’s forehead, but it didn’t douse her good humor. “Aren’t you going to eat?”
“No”—and Lucanis had to pause because Spite was hissing at his ear, needling at his nerve endings with jagged spikes—”no thank you. I’m not hungry.”
Rook considered Lucanis for what felt like an interminable amount of time, oddly expressionless. Then her lips curled up again, a smaller, kinder smile, and she shrugged. “Suit yourself.”
Pure relief washed all over Lucanis, making his shoulders sag. She never pushed him, not even—not even when she should. He was shamefully grateful for it. For her.
“Sorry,” Lucanis said for the third time, in yet another intonation. The one he meant the most. “Maybe next time.”
Rook just chuckled, eyes twinkling, and returned to her meal.
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maxkirin · 2 years ago
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dewdwrite · 3 months ago
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You guys liked the last one, so have another. I'm proud of this one, and honestly, it feels more like a proper shipping fic than just kink writing.
https://archiveofourown.org/works/63179821
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Dungeon delving wasn't exactly what Marcille had in mind after magic school but the group of misfits she found herself with were too good to pass up. Besides, she would never be able to investigate this dungeon on her own. It was filled to the brim with traps, monsters, and other adventures. She wasn’t made for this life though. She had a hard time adapting to the struggles of traveling.
They were deep into the dungeon now and this was the portion Marcille always dreaded the most. It wasn’t the danger or the distance from civilization, it was the fact they only had dry rations left. Rations were something she always struggled to stomach with her picky tastes. Hardtack was bland, difficult to eat and if you soaked it all you had was tasteless wet bread. Dried meat was tough and salty with little flavor. If you soaked that all you got was chewy wet meat and salt water to wash it down with. Dried fruits and nuts were alright but hardly enough to sustain a mage like her. Despite her size it was demanding on your body to use mana.
The party had been tracking a dragon that they were intending to kill. It was slow going and with low supplies the situation was growing dire. For now they could only rest and hope they accomplished their goal soon. Spirits would be low in most other groups but the Touden siblings had the uncanny ability to stay motivated no matter the odds. No one else had figured out if it was unwavering tenacity or just general stupidity.
Gathered around a small fire the group dug into the dried rations they all carried. Some with much more enthusiasm than others. Shuro and Namari were rather stoic, seeing eating as another task for survival than anything else. Laios and Falin however seemed to enjoy it just like any other meal. Both were eating with gusto like it was a fine meal. Laios was giving a speech about how they would find the dragon soon. The air was filled with his ramblings, fact after fact about red dragons.
Falin was sitting next to Marcille chewing and making soft satisfied sighs.The elf couldn’t believe how the tall women enjoyed any of this. She was soaking jerky and hardtack in her water cup and making an abomination you could loosely call beef stew. Marcille would have looked in horror if it was anyone else, but her deep seeded feelings for Falin made her actions tolerable. She was fishing out bites of her creation with her fingers and chewing it greedily. Marcille looked down at her own food in her lap. Despite her obvious hunger she had only managed a handful of nuts and half a piece of hardtack.
“Marcille, are you gonna eat that?” Falin asked, pointing to the uneaten rations in her lap.
Marcille couldn’t help but jump at the sudden attention from Falin. She quickly passed her portion of jerky to the tallwoman. “Yeah go ahead, I’m not very hungry.” She lied, passing her a piece of hardtack as well. She was actually starving, but she was already struggling to choke down even one piece of hardtack let alone three.
“Oh wow, thank you Marcille!” Falin exclaimed as she started to devour everything that was passed to her.
This meal was desperately needed as dull as it was. After days of walking they needed to try and keep their strength up for the final confrontation. As it went on Marcille passed more of her food to Falin until her lap was nearly as empty as her stomach. Sighing she drained her water cup along with the last few bits of hardtack grimacing as she swallowed. Falin sighed as well but for a different reason as she patted her stomach clearly quite satisfied.
The usual chatter around the fire persisted as the group questioned how Liaos could know so much and be so sure of this creature. Despite the odd leadership style the party functioned well together and they had confidence in the plan. Marcille was struggling to listen or even contribute much; she just wanted to rest. Soon enough that was the consensus as the party began to turn in for the night.
Marcille laid her bedroll right next to Falin’s and sat down beside her friend. Everyone was in the process of removing their outer layers of clothing and armor. Maricille was removing and folding her clothes into a pile before she gathered up Falin’s and did the same. “That was really good, I'm so full.” Falin said, laying back and resting her hands on her midriff.
Marcile finished laying out the clothes and sat beside her friend feeling content with her presence. “I'm glad, Falin, it's important to keep yourself fed so you can replenish your mana.” She said as she curled up pulling her legs closer to her chest. Her dinner of mostly water wasn’t sitting well in her stomach. She struggled to take basic care of herself but if Fallin was properly cared for that was usually enough for her.
Fallin looked at her friend with her usual eyes nearly shut expression of contentment. “You casted a lot more spells than me today. Would you like me to share some mana with you?” She asked, sitting up and looking down at the elf woman beside her.
“What? No, I’m fine you'll need it more than me!” Marcille practically shouted in utter disbelief.
“Oh well I just wanted to be sure. You said you weren't hungry, so I was worried you might have mana sickness.” Fallin said as she rubbed Marcilles back.
The touch sent a shockwave through her and she leaned into the tall-woman’s large hand. It nearly covered her entire shoulder blade and had a warmth that matched her caring personality. “I, I’m fine I’m just tired, a good night's sleep and I'll be all better. She said making excuses. Meanwhile she could already feel her stomach gurgling discontentedly at her meager meal.
“Ok if you say so.” Falin said softly. She was surprised at Marcille’s reaction, but trusted her friend's judgment. She didn’t pull her hand away though content with being close to her. “I think Laios will find the dragon soon and then will get to go back to town.”
“You think so? That would be really great.” Marcille replied, still distracted by the hand on her back. Just the idea of going back to town nearly brought tears of joy to her eyes. She craved actual food and a hot bath more than anything. For now though she’d settle for Falin comforting her.
“I know we will after we get this dragon.” Falin replied as if it was a simple task. Trying her best to support her friend. She patted Marcille’s back before laying back in her bedroll.
“I hope you’re right,” Marcille replied, letting her legs lay flat and pulling her spellbook in her lap. She struggled to read a few pages before giving up and laying back down. She was exhausted and a tight knot of hunger was forming in her stomach. She pulled her bulky book over top of it and let it weigh down her sunken midriff. She tried not to think about all the food she’d rather eat. How badly she wanted to get out of this dungeon again. Sighing, she turned her attention to Falin.
The tall-woman was laying down looking content as always. Her hands were resting on her stomach and a barely audible gurgling was filling the air between the two of them. “Hehe, so full.” Falin mumbled sleepily clearly in her own world on the verge of passing out. Marcille couldn’t help but smile seeing her so content and with so little too.
Marcille was anything but content. She was incredibly over tired and wasn’t sure when she’d be able to fall asleep. She grimaced as another wave of hunger pangs gnawed at her insides. She pressed her tome deeper into her midsection hoping it wouldn’t be too loud tonight. Her cheeks burned as she recalled many evenings like this where her underfed stomach would spend all night complaining.
Falin on the other hand was already snoring softly beside her. She'd eaten enough for two and despite the fact it wasn’t exactly a meal it was enough to sate her impressive appetite. The soft snores were accompanied by the low churning gurgles of her stomach breaking down the nearly indigestible rations.
Marcile didn’t understand it, hard tack sat in her stomach like stone. Her rapid metabolism didn’t seem anymore enthusiastic about it then she was. Falin however could eat only hardtack without even soaking it with ease. By the sounds of it she was digesting it just fine as well. Tall-women were so fascinating.. Well– one in particular was to her.
Her train of thought was broken by another wave of hunger that clawed through her insides. She pressed her book harder and muffled a long gurgling groan. Sighing, she glanced around the campsite. Everyone was already fast asleep. Soft breathing and not so soft snoring could be heard from all directions, still she was embarrassed at the idea of her stomach drowning it all out. She debated drinking more water but decided against it. If she had to get up to pee she definitely wouldn't sleep tonight.
She turned to Falin again, watching her sleep so comfortably. She cared so much for that woman. After spending their formative years together and now adventuring, it was hard to imagine life without her. Her presence made all the struggles and strife worth it. The tall-woman stirred in her sleep moving and turning on her side facing Marcille. Her soft steady breathing told the elf she was still asleep. Her eyes were shut so often it was hard to tell sometimes. Marcille stared at her and yearned to climb into her sleeping bag beside her. No, she couldn't disturb her slumber. Not for her own selfish reasons.
Her stomach broke her train of thought again. Its deep rumbling cry echoed inside Marcille’s hollow core. The sound went on for what seemed like an eternity as her body screamed for a proper meal. It wasn't just loud, it was painful making her flinch.
“Marcille?” Falins soft voice muffled still thick with sleep.
Marcille was frozen with embarrassment unsure if she should respond. It didn't really wake her up right? She thought to herself as Fallin looked over at her with mostly closed weary eyes.
“Are you hungry now?” The tall-woman asked, sitting up on her elbow.
“M-Me?” Marcille stammered unsure how she would explain.”Falin, I think you were dreaming. I'm no-” Her voice caught in her throat as Falin reached a hand over and rested it on her midriff. Her spell book sat beside her dropped and forgotten.
“Oh Marcille…” Falin whispered a hint of concern in her voice. Marcilles hunger was obvious. Healers had to be naturally intune with the body and were very familiar with all of its anatomy. Underneath Falins large gentle palm she could feel the restless churning of Marcilles insides searching for sustenance. She pressed down slightly frowning at the hollow space in her friend's stomach.
Marcille couldn't speak, not in this intimate moment where her bad habits had been found out. Even as Falin turned her attention away from her all she could do was lay there the feeling of guilt overwhelming her.
“Here this should help.” Falin said, passing a small sack to her friend. Marcille was still speechless and needed to be encouraged to open it. She couldn't believe it, inside was nearly a pound of dried berries and nuts.
“You always give me your hard tack. I started to feel bad. So I stopped eating these to give to you.” Fallin said with a warm smile.
Marcille could feel tears in the corners of her eyes. This small gesture had so much weight behind it. “You didn't have to do this.” She said, trying to keep her voice steady as she wiped her shirt sleeve across her face.
“You don't always eat.. and you'll need your strength to fight.” Fallin said, laying a reassuring hand on her friend's back.
Now Marcille was feeling even more guilty. Not only did Fallin notice but she even tried to help her. She couldn't hold it back anymore and wept softly holding the sack tight to her chest. “Thank you.” She croaked, worried that she didn't get the words out, they would lose meaning.
Fallin simply nodded and moved closer rubbing Marcilles back. Her friend was crying but it wasn't sadness, just an overwhelming moment. Fallin sat by and comforted Marcile like she always did. Falin wasn't sure if all elves were this emotional, or just her friend… it didn't matter. She was a healer and that meant helping someone when they were vulnerable. She held Marcille and whispered softly to her till she calmed down.
After Marcille was all cried out she got some water and began to slowly eat, savoring her gift. It wasn't a meal, rations never felt like one, but it was something solid she could tolerate. Slowly she felt the burning hunger inside her extinguish. With the obnoxious cries of her insides muffled she felt better, a little sleepy actually. “Thank you..” She said again.
Falin was already in the process of helping her lay down. “You should rest now. We've got lots to do tomorrow.” She said, stroking Marcille's hair. The elf nodded her baggy eyes finally closing with a look of contentment on her face.
Once Falin was sure Marcille was asleep she moved back onto her own bedroll for the night, both of them now full enough to sleep.
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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 2 years ago
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“We're all Mad here."
This is the first of a 7-part headcanon series for the Rollo at the Writing Desk blog event; the theme is basically "Rollo pays a visit to each of the dorms, and then chaos ensues". He'll have a chance to reconnect with old enemies friends from Glorious Masquerade, as well as meet new deplorable mages people! First up, an oldie but a goodie... Heartslabyul! (This one is extremely long because there are so many characters to account for 🤡)
A Big Heartslabyul Welcome to Rollo!
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His nose is assaulted with the overpowering aroma of roses as soon as he steps foot into the garden. In his hand is an invitation to Heartslabyul: it's the 5th of the month, and therefore, they will be holding a tea party as per the rules of the Queen of Hearts. The guest of honor? Him: Rollo Flamme.
He's immediately flanked by two lines of Heartslabyul students in dorm uniforms, their faces painted with a card suit and trumpets in hand. The brass instruments sound loudly as he passes.
The dorm has gone out of its way to prepare for this occasion: they've strung up lots of flags and lanterns, brought out their best tablecloths and fanciest silverware. The roses are both red and white today too--the colors together, signaling the arrival of a new acquaintance.
Rollo grimaces at the fanfare, the colorful decorations strung up, the sickeningly sweet smells wafting over. It's an ill reminder of Topsy-Turvy Day back home, how all the locals delight in the sin called magic.
Waiting for Rollo deep in the rose garden is the dorm leader and his second-in-command to greet him. Riddle offers a small, polite smile and extends a hand. "Rollo-senpai." (His thinking is, "Rollo-senpai is the headmaster's esteemed guest. Regardless of what happened in the past, we must maintain decorum for the duration of his stay.") Trey nods and gives a slight tip his hat.
Rollo meets them with a stiff smile of his own. His grasp on Riddle’s hand is impersonal, cold. “Riddle-kun and company. I am humbled to be invited to participate in your dormitory’s time-honored traditions.” (It’s a lie, but no one needs to know.)
The celebration begins! Rollo is allowed to sit near the head of the table, and he’s presented with a generous selection of familiar foods: croissants, madeleines, mousses, choux pastries, macarons, tarte tarin… even accursed savarin, the cake he considered the least appetizing.
“I did some research on the City of Flowers,” Trey casually explains. “I heard that’s where you’re from, so I wanted to give you a taste of home away from home.” (And in spite of how much he loathes mages, even Rollo is impressed. “Hmm, most astute. I must say, I commend your diligence.”)
Deuce offers to help Trey serve the guests. He's clumsy as he goes about pouring tea and passing out treats, but he's trying his best! When Deuce gets to Rollo, he attempts to bow in reverence--but ends up smacking his head into Rollo's chin and spilling tea all over him instead!
... Needless to say, Rollo is NOT happy about it, especially not when Riddle intervenes with magic to clean him up against his wishes. Deuce apologizes profusely to him for the rest of the day.
With the abundance of sweets, poor Cater's suffering out here. He makes whatever excuses he can to shove off his desserts onto Rollo, gushing about how "We gotta spoil our guest with Heartslabyul hospitality! Go on, have some of Cay-kun's cakes!"
Riddle offers Rollo a strawberry tart as a sort of... peace offering? Rollo accepts it, but he takes only a small sliver from the whole tart and nibbles on that like a starving man might ration his last loaf of bread. It raises eyebrows, but Riddle wisely chooses to not comment. It doesn't go unnoticed by Rollo, who simply replies, "Everything in moderation."
There's some tension amongst the group, on account of what went down in the City of Flowers having been told to a few select dorm members. Ace in particular is eyeing Rollo suspiciously while he munched on a slice of cherry pie.
"This dorm can barely handle one anger-prone arsonist," he had told Deuce prior to the party, "now we're supposed to deal with TWO? You might as well just set the whole garden on fire to save us some time." (But to Ace's surprise, Deuce actually defended Rollo. "He deserves a chance to redeem himself! If I'm aiming to go from delinquent to honor student, then I should have the same faith in others to change too!")
Whenever Rollo has his back to the first years, Ace makes faces at him or mimics the uptight way Rollo sits—back straight, fingers laced, expression neutral yet stern. When Rollo looks back, Ace returns to acting like everything is totally normal.
Shockingly, it’s Rollo that makes the first faux paus of the afternoon. After the incident with Deuce, he requests coffee in lieu of tea, which earns audible gasps from around the garden. Rollo stares at all the mobs gawking at him as though he has committed a heinous crime. Riddle looks like he's going to strangle a cat. “… Have I said something out of turn?”
Trey intervenes with a fresh cup of tea and tells everyone to relax, whispering to Rollo that coffee is only for birthdays. Really, Trey ends up playing mediator for the entire party.
It's then that Rollo learns that there exists a set of rules penned by the Queen of Hearts herself. Riddle proudly declares that he knows all 810 of them by heart (and that he expects all of his dorm members to do the same to honor the Queen's spirit of strictness). "Oh? And just what might these rules be?" Rollo asks.
Riddle's more than happy to oblige with a looong lecture about the 810 rules. He starts a pop quiz on the spot to test Rollo, and, to everyone's shock, he answers each and every one of them correctly. "I guess you're not student council president of Noble Bell College for nothing," Riddle mutters. "You have an impressive memory." (In truth, Rollo only made an effort to perform well out of sheer spite.)
Cater mentions that he thinks Riddle and Rollo are a lot alike. This riles them both up, and they simultaneously shout, “In what way am I like him?!” (“Ooh, you even share the same thoughts. That’s big twin energy,” Cater laughs.)
While talking over tea, Cater learns that Rollo writes letters instead of using social media. "Eeeeh, there are people that live in this day and age without a Magicam account?! How do you survive..." Cater proceeds to spend the rest of the party chatting him up and trying to convince him to make an account so he can keep in touch (terrible, really--Cater is exactly the type of noisy, frivolous person Rollo detests), all the while Rollo tries his best to dodge questions.
The meal is finished without further (major) incidents--but roughly 15 minutes in, Riddle claps his hands and announces that everyone must leave the table, as per rule 271. Rollo starts to excuse himself, Trey lays a hand on his shoulder and beams. "We need one more player for croquet."
And so Rollo is dragged into playing a round with the Heartslabyul boys. He's told the rules and handed a red flamingo and hedgehog (both of which stare at him dubiously as he handles them as though they're diseased).
On his first turn, Rollo struggles to get his mallet and ball to behave! The flamingo keeps twisting its neck instead of staying straight for his shot, and the hedgehog keeps scampering away!! "Strange, they usually behave so well," Riddle notes. ("They must not like the cartoon supervillain vibes he's giving off," Ace grumbles in the background. "A-Ace! You can't just say that!" Deuce protests. "What if he hears?!")
His hedgehog sneezes when he at last punts it, which brings the game to a screeching halt as all the card soldiers burst out into song. (Rule 304, Rollo lamented. Why can't they be silent like unrung bells?! His blood pressure is rising, his ears ringing. He tries to focus on the match to distract himself.)
Over time, Rollo becomes more accustomed with how to get a control of his mallet and ball--he's back in the game! (It's not that he's particularly competitive, but he absolutely refuses to be outdone by these haughty NRC mages... especially not Riddle, who's smirking at him so smugly!)
Unfortunately for Rollo, he can't beat Riddle despite his best efforts--though he does manage to snag second place, pulling a little ahead of Trey. There's polite clapping from the other players to congratulate them (though a few look worried).
As Rollo is returning his equipment, a horrible realization dawns on him: rule 703: Whoever comes in 2nd place during a croquet match must serve tea to the Queen the next day. He slowly turns to Riddle, whose arms are folded expectantly. "I eagerly await my tea," the redhead tells him.
Rollo feels faint. He dabs at his forehead with his handkerchief in a vain attempt to dispel some of his dread. (It doesn't help one bit.)
Before he's able to leave, Cater pulls in him by the arm, his phone at the ready. "We should totes take a group selfie to commemorate the occasion~ Since you don't have a Magicam account, I'll print up a copy for you to pick up when you drop by tomorrow!"
Rollo doesn't have the chance to protest before Heartslabyul members crowd around him, squeezing in for the photo. It's hard for him to breathe, trapped between all these writhing bodies and surrounded by boisterous laughter.
He catches the eye of Riddle beside him and manages to choke out, "How you manage with this kind of madness every day, I'll never understand."
"It is mad, yes," Riddle says with a knowing smile, "and there are days when my dorm members drive me up the wall and leave me with no choice but to collar them in retaliation. Still... I think that's part of the fun. The chaos is ours to share. It's something I've never experienced in the small world I came from."
"Preposterous. There is no conceivable way anyone in their right mind would be endeared to this."
... Right?
Just as the tendril of doubt makes itself known… SNAP! The picture is taken, forever immortalizing the moment.
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changenameno · 9 months ago
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My Own (Chapter 4)
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Summary:
Geralt finds himself once more on the path, gloomily looking at what lies ahead.
And you? You had no one, no home and certainly no coin. Well that’d be something you had in common. No coin. You two are surely off to a great start…
Pairing: Geralt of Rivia x Fem. Nymph Reader
Warnings: 18+, tragic backstory, death + violence, angsty ending to this chapter, MDNI (there will be smut in the future)
Word count: 1.1K
A/N: Geralt learns who you are exactly…. I whipped this up, yesterday night, when I had a minute to myself :)…Again all reblogs and comments are much appreciated (please be kind though)! Hope you enjoy reading!❤️✨
(FYI: This won’t follow the exact timeline of the Witcher. But Geralt has met Jaskier already.)
!The Witcher characters and world are not mine!
 
🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻
(In case you’ve missed CHAPTER 3)
CHAPTER 4
 
Neither you, nor him wanted to talk about what had occurred. So instead of making this anymore awkward than need be, you both had settled in, by the fire.
As the silence between you stretched relentlessly, you became more and more restless, so you told him your name and then continued, “Well just thought you might want to know. And…thank you for, removing the arrow.”
“You must be hungry.” Unsure why he seemed to ignore your previous statement, you simply nodded. Because quite frankly you were starving.
Geralt got to his feet and returned shortly, after he’d pulled his water-skin and his last piece of bread out of his saddlebags. He handed them to you, then sat back down to your right, closer than before.
Your mouth salivated just smelling the bread, but first you took a big swing of the water. Murmuring, “Thanks.” Then you began devouring the bread as if it were your last meal.
Focusing on your lips, he wondered how they’d feel against his. Probably soft and perfectly sultry. Evidently unable to stop his speculations, he gave in and let his inappropriate thoughts run free.
In fact he’d been so lost in thought, he only caught the end of what you’d said,”…aren’t you?”
Expectedly you raised your brow, waiting for his answer to your question.
He blinked a few times, trying to clear his head. “What?”
Either he wasn’t used to company — at all — or he was a bit slow. In any case you repeated your earlier query, “I said, you are the whited-haired Witcher. The Geralt of Rivia of the songs, aren’t you? ”
Grinding his teeth at the reminder of Jaskier’s stupid, although well-known songs, he managed a nod, not trusting he wouldn’t snarl at you.
As he didn’t know anything about you, apart from your name, he opted to ask you a question of his own, “How come, I had to remove an arrow from your shoulder? Who shot you and why?”
Another pressing question of his was, what you were? Because he knew you weren’t human. But he’d the feeling you weren’t particularly chatty either, so he wanted to go slow, to prevent you from closing up again.
His question caught you off guard. Yet you knew that you owed him an honest answer, after all he’d saved you and had dressed your wound.
Sighing you began, “It’s a bit of a long story…” Then you told him, how your life had been in danger even before it’d really started. Being born half nymph, half mage, put you in a position of unknown power and therefore in peril. Especially because it wasn’t heard off, that a female mage still possessed a womb and could get pregnant.
Your mother had been a mage at court and your father was a forest nymph. Once they’d met, falling in love head over heels.
You were smiling softly when you told him that next part, “You know nearly like an invisible pull, they were made for each other. Sort of destined to meet.” Geralt listened to you attentively, taking in your every word and expression, while you talked.
He noted that the smile you wore, wasn’t a happy one, as it didn’t reach your eyes and your voice was becoming huskier the longer you continued your story.
“Unfortunately it didn’t end very well for them. Once I was born, my mum tried hiding me from court. Because the king and queen had tried conceiving for years, desperately wanting a child of their own. And she knew they weren’t above, taking me away from her. So I lived with my dad and other nymphs in the nearby forest, for about ten years. Learning their ways and customs.”
Swallowing thickly, you averted your gaze, staring into the sizzling flames in front of you, though proceeding with your narrative, ” One day my mum showed up, devastated. They had found out about me and wanted to have me as their own, as their heir. Going as far as threatening to burn down the whole forest and slaughtering everyone in their way. I was terrified, so I readily agreed to come to court, not wanting anyone to die because of me. What I didn’t know, was that as soon as I was in the castle, they proceeded with their murderous plan. Needing to destroy any chance of being reclaimed by my parents.”
Nearly overcome by emotion, you stopped there, breathing unsteadily.
The Witcher was a better listener than you’d given him credit for, not once interrupting you or commenting.
When your tear filled eyes, landed on his gleaming ones, you somehow found the strength to carry on.
“They killed them. Made me Princess, and declared me their daughter. I hated them, loathed their very existence for years. But they were the only people looking after me. And as much as I hate to admit it, they were kind to me and the castle slowly became my home. But when word spread about my inheritance, other kingdoms grew interested. Proposing marriages, left and right. However the king and queen didn’t want that, outright refused. Their mistake, because a nearby kingdom, saw that as opportunity to take me by force. They came during the night. Killing everyone. Burning down, my second home. The only place I’d left.”
Geralt knew that was the tragic end to the story, because he must have found you shortly after you’d escaped. Now he finally knew why you’d healed so quickly. You were part nymph.
“I’m sorry”, was the only thing that he thought would be appropriate to say.
He was certain you’d told him the truth, because he could list at least five kings that wouldn’t have hesitated to do the same, or would have paid him handsomely, just to get you within their grasp. Something similar must have crossed your mind, since all of a sudden your face was contorted, looking terror-stricken.
He wouldn’t turn you in, would he? You knew supposedly, witchers didn’t have emotions and he’d be paid good money to catch you. And from the looks of it, he surely could need some money. But he’d saved you. So Geralt wouldn’t do it, right? Before your anxious thoughts would overhelm you entirely, you took action.
Your musical, though wavering voice broke the silence,” You’re not turning me in, are you?”
Afraid of his answer, you drew in a sharp breath.
Dread filling you, as he abruptly rose up.
CHAPTER 5
🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻🌻


Taglist:
If you’re interested in being on my taglist please let me know! And if you want to be taken off (my taglist), feel free to tell me! ❤️✨
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teamtakagi · 25 days ago
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Injury Dialogue Prompt #4
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Thanks for the asks, @a-mumbling-nerd , @woundedsoul12, and @larknnightingale !
Finally the last of the Injury Dialogue Prompts. These were fun, but really hard. This last installment is pretty rough, so not as much Jerran being Jerran here.
Original prompt here by @promptsbytaurie .
A sequel piece to Injury #2. Please read that first before this one. 
CW: Describes the effects of a stroke (medical emergency). 
______
Prompts:  
4. “You did so good. Don't worry, you - you did so good.”
7. “No. No, stop. Stop talking like that. You’re gonna be fine.”
10. I don’t care. I'm not leaving you.
28. It was supposed to be me … please no [name]
____
Coughing, Jerran studied the pen marks that he'd made on a piece of paper tacked to the Dining Hall wall before adding another. Seven marks. A week then, since…. 
For a moment, he was back on a warehouse floor while distorted gray and red hoods leaned over him, blood dripping from his nose and mouth. One of the figures murmured a spell and raised its hand; Jerran screamed as his shoulder wrenched with a sharp twist and pop —-
He abruptly slammed the pen back on the dining room table, wishing it was buried in the eyeholes of those goddamned hoods. Fuck the Venatori.
Elfroot potions and the mages’ healing magic reduced the amount of damage that the Venatori had done, but his body decided to succumb to a nasty cold that he’d managed to resist until now. He'd stumbled into the infirmary next to Varric, wrapped himself in as many blankets as he could, and ordered for everyone to leave him the fuck alone. Please. 
Four days later, Jerran emerged from his sweat-soaked cocoon like a ravenous Darkspawn with a slightly stuffy nose and a cough, but no fever. Thank the Maker the dwarf wasn’t particularly chatty for once. As much as he liked talking to Varric, any sound felt like nails scraping over rock. A bath and fresh fatigues made him almost feel normal.
Now, his growling stomach reminded him of the original reason why he was standing there in the first place. Grabbing his prizes – a chunk of bread, cheese, and a slice of Rivanian ham with a goblet of watered down ale  –  he settled into his seat. He’d just stuffed some cheese into his mouth when the door slammed open, accompanied by a cacophony of voices.
“Rook?” Neve called, stepping into the room. Relief filled her face as she spotted Jerran at the table. “You’re alive. I wasn’t sure, to be honest.”
“Yep, he’s here. I’ve smelled better Darkspawn in the Hossberg Wetlands,” Taash said, poking their head around the corner and wrinkling their nose.
“Oh thank the gods,” Bellara chattered, popping up behind Taash. “I thought maybe the Caretaker had carted him off or something. You never know.”
Jerran rolled his eyes. “Taash, I took a bath, thank you very much.” Then he saw the serious look on Neve's face. “What's wrong?”
Neve pulled out a chair and sat down. “We got a problem in Docktown. Remember when the Venatori didn’t seem to recognize that you were Rook? Well… I found out why.”
Jerran swallowed the cheese. “Because the Venatori are stupid?” 
She ignored his jibe. “Viper sent word — apparently some young Shadow Dragons took it upon themselves to disguise themselves as fake Rooks and ran around the city. Maker knows where they got the idea.  They went missing while you were sick. The Shadow Dragons found all of them dead except one called Tarlin.” 
“Fuck.” He staggered to his feet, his appetite rapidly diminishing. “I’ll ask Lucanis for help with a disguise and dress as a Shadow Dragon. Whatever happened to Tarlin – it was supposed to be me. I can’t just sit there.”
“Please no, Jerran. You’ve barely healed from the last time you went, and you're still recovering from being sick,” Bellara protested. Neve and Taash added their own disapproval. 
Jerran held up a hand to silence their protests, coughing slightly. “Bel, ask Harding for any extra elfroot. I’ll need all that she can spare. We move out in a half hour.” 
“It’s an obvious trap,” Taash said. “And your shoulder is still busted.”
“It’s mostly healed. And that's why I'll have you with me.” Jerran sliced the bread in half, jammed the ham and remaining cheese into it, and gulped the watered-down ale. “Tell everyone to meet in the library in ten minutes to go over the plan.” 
*******
The Minrathous clothing felt too ornate for his taste, but no one would suspect a Grey Warden to change out of uniform. Jerran pulled his hair back and tucked it under a stained hat that Neve had dug up from somewhere. 
A little bit of Crow makeup to change his skin tone and walking with more of a stoop helped him avoid too much notice as he followed the rest of the team along the edge of Docktown. 
After a couple hours of searching rundown warehouses and underground tunnels – the Shadow Dragons and Threads had offered some key information – Neve spotted Tarlin first.  “Rook.”
The rest of the team fanned out to secure the area as Neve and Jerran cautiously approached the moaning young elf, who lay face down in the middle of the floor. Their fingers shook as they clutched strands of medium-length dark curly hair. Even from this angle, Jerran could tell that the blood-stained and ripped clothes were once Grey Warden-issued. Probably pinched off of a body or sold by an uncaring relative. 
Neve gently knelt next to the elf and rolled them over. “Tarlin, it’s Neve. Neve Gallus. You’re safe now.” 
“Shit,” Jerran muttered as he took in the Shadow Dragon’s half-drooping face. His stomach churned at the resemblance; while his own face was sharper and angular than Tarlin’s more rounded cheeks, there was no mistaking an uncanny similarity.  With the dyed hair and darkened skin, they could have been siblings.
“Head… ‘urts. Bad,” Tarlin mumbled, the words wet and slipping like porridge flung against a wall. 
“We’re going to get you help.” Neve’s voice remained steady. When she met Jerran’s eyes, the fury in them matched the rising anger within Jerran.
Taash returned along with Bellara. “It’s clear. What happened to them?”
Jerran recalled seeing something like this before; an old man who always shouted at Jerran and the other neighborhood children had suffered a similar condition. He’d ended up sitting silently in a chair, drooling and unable to speak.  “Whatever the Venatori did, we need to get them to a Shadow Dragon healer. Fast.” 
Tarlin tried to grab the detective’s robes. Their left hand scrabbled weakly for purchase as the right hand clutched her lapels.  “Naddy, gotta… leave ‘ow. Leave me.”
“I don’t care. I’m not leaving you,” Neve told them. “Taash, we’ll need you to carry them.”
Taash nodded. Jerran helped Taash roll the weak elf over and lift them onto Taash’s back. 
“Shorry… sho shorry, Naddy,” Tarlin mumbled. “I… fail. Mission. Head hurts bad.”
“You did good.” Jerran took a shuddering breath. “Don’t worry, you – you did so good. You’re going to be fine.” Empty words, he knew. But it was the only thing he could offer.
******
Jerran silently closed the infirmary room door and walked to where Neve waited in the Shadow Dragon’s hallway. He scrubbed a hand over his face. “Aelia did this, didn’t she? As a warning. Played with them like a toy and left them alive long enough for us to find them.”
Neve paused. “We have to take Aelia down or she’ll leave more like that in her wake.”
“Who is Naddie?”
“Natalie is an older sister. I suspect that she and I are in the same category in their mind as a female protector. Sometimes the mind does that — can't quite fetch the right words.” Neve pulled out her pipe and held it loosely in her hand. 
“Those fucking Venatori.” Jerran glanced at Neve. “It’s my fault.”
Neve’s face softened. “No, no, stop. Stop talking like that.” 
“Tarlin was just a kid.” 
“Many Shadow Dragons are. Viper never told them to do this. They did this on their own because they believe in you.” 
Jerran laughed bitterly. “Well, they’re following a fuckup that hears voices. They need to find another hero.” A round of coughing interrupted his words.
Neve slapped him on the back. “Let’s get you back to the Lighthouse before Emmrich has a conniption fit. He was brewing some sort of tea when we left. Supposed to be good for the lungs.”
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kookaburra1701 · 11 days ago
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WIP Wednesday: Katabasis
I was tagged by @dirty-bosmer
I am tagging @saltymaplesyrup, @gilgamish, @moriche and @thana-topsy
I have some more for Khemor's MQ fic. This takes place early on when he has been called to High Hrothgar by the Greybeards, resting in Ivarstead with his Stormcloak escort/honor guard/Ulfric's insurance that the LDB doesn't go haring off to an Imperial-controlled hold
Fandom: The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim Rating: T (blood and violence) Category: Gen Genre(s): Action/Adventure Main characters: Khemor gro-Skaven (Male Orc LDB), Calder, Gregor
Summary: A prequel for Nostos, detailing how Khemor went from a senior magus in the College of Whispers to becoming the Last Dragonborn, Thane of Windhelm and the Pale, confidant of Ulfric Stormcloak and traitor to the Empire.
=================================
With a weary sigh and a flick of his tail, Derkeethus slid onto the bench next to Calder. The small inn was full to bursting: in addition to its usual clientele of local farmers, fishermen, and woodsmen, the detachment of Stormcloaks from Riften’s forces combined with the escort from Windhelm was straining the capacity of the small hamlet. He was almost done with his supper anyways, and moved over to make room.
“Have you been able to find a place for the night?” Calder asked. “I think we’re going to end up on the common room floor, if not our tents. But I suppose that’s not a concern for you.”
The Argonian took a bite of the smoked salmon on his trencher, swallowing the strip of flesh whole before responding, “What do you mean?”
“Oh,” Calder waved his hand. “I heard your folk were just as able to sleep in the water as on land. Must be handy for traveling, saving on rooms in inns.”
Derkeethus paused, tilting his head to get a better look at Calder. “I always have a place by Klimmek’s fire when I’m in Ivarstead,” Derkeethus jerked his snout to the corner where a bearded man was deep in conversation with Ralof and Commander Gonnar Oath-Giver. “We fish and trade together often. He knows the way up the mountain as well as I know the trail from Darkwater Crossing. You’ll be in good care with him as your scout.”
Calder sopped up the last bit of pottage with a bread-crust and washed it down with the last of his mead. More soldiers were trooping in from the outside, and as much as he did not want to stand, someone would be wanting his seat soon. At least his duty to Khemor meant he would be sleeping under a roof with the mage: he suspected most of the other Stormcloaks in Commander Oath-Giver’s company would be in tents or making do in the cowsheds and barns tonight.
“The minnow is escaping your net,” Derkeethus said mildly.
A flutter of black fabric caught Calder’s eye, disappearing through the door as it closed behind the soldiers. It was Calder’s turn to sigh. Of course, the most likely explanation was that Khemor had stepped out for a bit of fresh air. The common room of the Vilemyr Inn was smoky, hot, and loud.
But Jarl Ulfric himself had ordered Calder to ensure the Dragonborn made it safely to High Hrothgar and back. It would not do for Khemor to go wandering unaccompanied, even in such a quiet place as Ivarstead.
He returned his trencher to the innkeeper, who immediately began slopping more pottage on it for the next Stormcloak demanding a meal. The pretty barmaid was standing in the middle of a knot of soldiers, laughing and tuning her lute. As Calder stepped out into the night air, the first notes of a simple melody followed him through the door.
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giorno-plays-piano · 2 years ago
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Unsteady
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Pairing: Aemond Targaryen x mage!reader
Warnings: allusion to yandere, canon-typical violence, mentions of murder, exhausted and crying Aemond, hurt/comfort.
Words: 2k
Summary: Quiet, you stand together, leaning on the balcony and watching the dead sea, each left to your own thoughts. The silence between you is not strained but comforting, an indication of peace and, perhaps, some sort of unity. In the end, you are on his side.
P.S. Well, here we are! Hope you enjoy my first HOTD story!
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Your continous lack of sleep is slowly making you delirious. Tossing and turning in bed for hours, you can almost imagine stealing the sword of your guard and going on a rampage inside the Red Keep: this is how hopelessly tired you feel.
You take a breath. When you close your eyes, you are back home. You see the blinding light shine through the vast windows, the ancient walls made of sand and magic, and so many embroidered red and yellow pillows on the floor they nearly cover it all. Young girls and boys sing incantations that sound like music in the courtyard. If you turn your head to the east wing, you can smell barley bread baked in the kitchen along with sweet date cookies that will be served tonight as they have been for centuries.
But when you open your eyes, you see only the darkness of the room that isn't yours; a foreign castle where it's so painfully hard to breathe, to think; a gloomy, hostile world you are being held as a prisoner. Nothing here reminds you of home. You are a stranger to these lands, these people.
Nevertheless, you can't leave. Not yet. Not until the new King is crowned and your promise is fulfilled.
You stumbled upon this world by mistake, the new spell taking you in a completely different direction from where you were supposed to land. You were awaited in Turas, a place with the densest population of witches and warlocks, but you landed here, in this godforsaken little world with almost no magic left in it sans some dragons and a very few ancient priestesses who are impossible to locate. Without a great source of magic, you can't travel between dimensions, your coiffers empty from your last attempt. And although there is some great force in the dragon's fire, you need permission of its owner to have their pet shooting flames at you. Enraging Vhagar and having her blow fire at you for a minute or two doesn't work since she does it for far too short, and the spell needs more time. You tried.
But Otto Hightower will sooner stuff his mouth with glass than let you go and miss an opportunity to have you aid the Greens.
So you stay. You pretend to be the Queen's niece, a daughter of her older cousin, eager to come to court and serve the Crown. You do almost exactly that, to be precise: hunt down the spies like Talia and a few other maids, force information out of people with the help of your spells, and sometimes murder someone who's notoriously hard to kill.
Not Rhaenyra, though. Alicent forbids.
You hate it here with all your being. This realm is a cage. There are no good sides in the court - neither green nor black. Regardless of who wins, people will suffer. This place is doomed, and you ache to get as far from it as you can, back to the ancient Tower of Babylon on the crossroads of the worlds, the only place you call home. Every single day spent in Westeros, you miss it along with your people.
Finally, you realize you can't sleep. Laying on this ridiculously uncomfortable bed, albeit quite lavish, in hopes of falling asleep is silly, and you stand up, searching for your dress. Perhaps it is worth taking a stroll before returning to bed. Maybe the chilling air will clear your head and your heart.
Slipping away from your room without guards noticing is as easy as taking a candy from a child, your magic clouding their mind, lulling them in the false sense of security. You can't make people do what you want directly, or frankly, you wouldn't be here, but your spells are most helpful to obscure the mind and blur the vision, and you luckily evade a few servants and more guards on your way as you unlock the door to one of the numerous balconies, usually deserted both during the day and at night.
But you're not alone. You walk in only to stare at the sharp features of Aemond who looks like he wants to skewer an intruder on his sword, his expression both painful and enraged.
When he recognizes your face, he softens, though.
"Cousin," you smile at him anxiously, playing brave as you stroll closer, pretending you are glad to see him.
He relaxes his tightly clenched, thin lips, and you see how tired and utterly exhausted he seems, his eye bloodshot as he stands in his full day attire as if he didn't event attempt to go to bed, knowing he won't sleep. Perhaps Aemond seems malicious and fiery to others, standing tall among other Targaryen siblings, but to you, he is only a boy. A mutilated, desperate to survive youngest son with no one but his mother on his side. Otto molds his abused grandchild into the perfect dragon warrior and a vicious protector of the Greens, expecting him to be there when Aegon is made king, and it makes you sick to keep watching them.
Still, it is not your story. Not your place to change things, however wrong they are. You will be gone soon, and you should leave these people to their fate.
"You don't have to call me that when we're alone," he mutters, a ghost of a smile on his lips.
"Would you prefer my Prince?" You let out a snicker in hopes to get him to smile wider, but he doesn't, turning back to face the darkness above the sea, his hands on the stone rails.
He doesn't look good. The shadow beneath his eye intensify, eyelid droopy, and his lips are cracked and dry, but it is his expression that worries you most of all. Aemond looks like he is barely holding on, slowly being buried under the pressure of Otto's expectations and Alicent's maniac fear for his life. He lives on a knife-edge, and you wouldn't want to trade places with him even under a promise to rule the whole Westeros.
Quiet, you stand together, leaning on the balcony and watching the dead sea, each left to your own thoughts. The silence between you is not strained but comforting, an indication of peace and, perhaps, some sort of unity. In the end, you are on his side. Despite how much you dislike being entangled in the intrigues of the court, you have compassion towards Alicent and her children. You wish you could take them away from this place and let them discover what a true life behind the castle walls is.
Besides, over the course of many months spent here, you grow surprisingly fond of Aemond. You are unsure if it is his spirit, perhaps, or his passion that draws you towards him, but he is fascinating, one of a kind. The only one who keeps trying over and over again; who keeps pushing forward, paving the road for his mother and siblings despite the unfair treatment. It is attractive, isn't it?
If only people stop messing with his head.
Suddenly, Aemond winces, and the spell is broken between the two of you when you stare at him, anxious again. Unsurprisingly, he turns away, but this time, you are too concerned to leave him alone.
"Aemond, what is it?" You ask, planting your hands on his shoulders to stop him from moving away from you.
Stubborn, he turns his head, nonetheless, and doesn't speak a word like he's a kid all over again, pretending everything is fine. You catch a glimpse of his swollen eye, the veins in it so red you realize he is hurt.
"Are you in pain?"
He says nothing at all until you grab his face between your hands and make him look at you, forcing him to bend over to you because he certainly has blood of the giants in his veins. Looking him straight in the eye, you feel him trembling in your hands, panic surging through you. What is it? Did he get hurt during one of his endless trainings? Is it something else? A slow poison? An old wound?
"It can't hurt in there," he whispers angrily, tears rolling down his cheek as he looks to the side, hopelessly trying to evade your eyes. "I don't even have it anymore."
It takes you a second to realize what he means. He is talking about his other eye.
Letting go of his face, you bit your lips, wishing you could do anything at all to fix it. Were you there the night he was mutilated, you could have saved the eye, make Aemond whole again, but it's far too late. You aren't capable of recreating limbs or any other body parts out of thin air.
"We call it phantom pain."
Swallowing, you raise your hand to his eyepatch, and he flinches, refusing to let you lift it. You voice softens as you take him by the hand. "I promise, I won't take it off."
Aemond looks like he'd rather have you put a red-hot poker in his mouth, but he stills, tears still streaming down his chin while you murmur incantations, your palm covering his eyepatch. Perhaps your voice soothes him, or perhaps the spell works swiftly, but he quiets down fast, unmoving as you numb his pain. It is one of a few things you can do just for him, not because you are serving the Greens, and you wish he'd tell you when he's hurt. You wish he'd seek your help.
It's been several minutes: the spell should have fully kicked in, you believe. Slowly taking your palm away from his eyepatch, you observe your prince carefully, watching for any signs of discomfort to patch him up further, if needed. As you take his face in your hands and ask him to please let you examine him, make sure he feels better, Aemond suddenly sniffs again, his shoulders shaking violently.
You pull him into your embrace without even recognizing what you are doing. It is a reflex of sorts, a simple reaction to someone's distress. Back at home, your teachers would always tease you for your relentless desire to comfort people, calling you a wannabe therapist. But that was back there, in a safe, kind place where people don't fight for the thrones, power, and money. This world and its inhabitants are painfully different.
Maybe not in everything, though. Because the next thing you know, Aemond is bending over to lean on you, hiding his face in the crook of your neck, his hands around your back. He shakes like a leaf, like a child who had known no comfort, no safety. It is the first time you see him like that, so defenseless and bare, because Aemond is fearsome even in private with his family, and he made you nervous on numerous occasions with his intense stare or a strained, disturbing smile. It feels almost unreal to have him here, in your hands, crying like a human being.
But he is real, and he is human.
"You'll get better," you promise him, gently whispering words of comfort in his ear, suddenly thankful he doesn't see you tearing up yourself. "I'll make the pain go away."
Those are hollow words: you can only treat him again and again, not make the pain disappear forever, but it should suffice for now, and he will be able to sleep.
How many nights did he spend here, standing and trying to overcome pain in something that can't heal? He would never tell his mother not to antagonize her again about not protecting her child. Otto, undoubtedly, would simply say something along the "deal with it" lines, you think, feeling distressed. This must have been going on for years since Aemond was a child. You can't possibly leave him alone with his pain.
Clinging to you, he shudders silently, not a sound coming from him as if he learned how to cry noiselessly over the years on a balcony. When you try to move a little, he presses himself to you even tighter, not letting you go, but you don't plan on pushing him away. In this moment, you are ready to give him anything he asks.
You don't know the sort of emotion it awakens in him when he feels it, too.
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