#the knowledge that humans have been humans for so long

[thedeadtalker]

-my grandfather was 8 when he and his family were rounded up on the Oregon coast, kept in a livestock pen for 3 very rainy days, then put into a cattle car to be carried out to the reservations in the east.

-my grandmother had two brothers and sister who were sent to mission school and never returned. They said they ran away. They lied.

-My mom remembers when Indians got enough citizenship to vote in Oregon. She describes her parents and their friends discussing if the should do it -vote -or if it was trick to register them.

-My friend took his grandmother out for her 100th birthday. He asked her what she thought were the most important things to happen during her lifetime. She told him: free wifi and the legal end of segregation.

-I remember those fucking nuns in mission school. I only went 1 year when the laws changed and we could go to other schools. We could live with our parents and ride a bus to school and back again and sleep that night in our own home. I remember that, you fuckers.

-I remember that my mom and two of her sisters gave birth in a hospital connected to the mission, and they didnt know for years that they'd gotten botched steralizations against their wishes and without their knowledge. I remember my parents desperatly trying to have more children. Theyd always wanted a bunch of kids. The house my dad built had many empty guestrooms. Eventually they sold it. I remember my mom having to have a hysterectomy 2 years ago because of all the health problems caused by the fucked up surgery. I remember sitting in a meeting and one of the nurses there having to put me through a fainting protocol because i got a text from my stepfather that during the hysterectomy they discovered one of mom's damned ovaries was just fucking gone. I wonder sometimes if some sick fuck retired doctor kept a genuine Indian ovary in a jar in his office. I wonder if his nazi kids and grandkids pull it out to show to guests as a conversation point. I think about how whites were paid piecework for Indian scalps amd seeing one dried out and leathery in an antique store in a small town in Idaho. There is evil in the Americas. The nazis were here long before they were ever in Europe.

- I remember my highschool history teacher showing us the number tattooed on his wrist. I remember him showing us all these recordings of ordinary German citizens talking about how they didn't see anything wrong happening. How there must have been some sort of perfecrly mundane reason for the endless smoke pouring from the ovens in the camp up in the hill. How it was all just politics. How they were reassured that all the people who were taken had just moved in the night, or were much happier wherever they'd gone to. "But you saw them all: the Jews, the other prisoners going into the camp. But you never saw them leave. Didn't you think that was odd?" "We just figured they'd moved from the camp in the night while we were sleeping." "Where?" "What do you mean?" "Where did you all think they went -in the middle of the night?" "Oh. We didn't know." "Didn't you wonder?" "Why would we?"

- I remember that same teacher explaining how the nazis had gotten a lot of their ideas from the US government's Native American policy. The death camps were modelled after our reservations. The dehumanizing and the stories of savages/gremlins that ate white babies and were less than human were based on the clever marketing campaign set up to not just enable the settler take over, but used to unite the fragmented people of newly forming colonial nation. He fucking showed us. There is publically available documentation of all of this.

-I remember getting put on the no fly list. I remember finding out about it because when we tried to buy tickets for the whole family to travel down to New Mexico for my granduncle's funeral the whole purchase was bounced. We were told why that might be the case so we tried seperate purchases for everyone. Me. It was me. Several years later my roommate's family friend -an old white guy with some pull, found out why. I was teaching K-3 and moonlighting as a computer programmer back then. And I'd printed some photos of holidays around the world to share with my students on the same computer I wrote code from. My own computer, in my own office, in my own home. He said it also didn't help that I wasn't white.

-I remember that fucker's first time in office: I remember seeing my coworker snatched from the elevator by ice agents and shoved into an unmarked van. He was a 3rd generation American.

-I remember having to warn the non-white, non-abled, non anything a nazi would want to gas you for residents of the dvsat shelter we worked with to not go out at night, not go out alone, not walk on these specific streets or go into these specific shops. I remember the time a native Hawaiian chick on my caseload didn't come back when expected and everyone was out of their mind with worry. She came back, tear-streaked and shaking, and told us about how she'd gotten lost (not in Hawaii any more, Dorothy) and ended up in one of the neighborhoods she was supposed to avoid, and being chased by some of the proud boys that patrolled our city streets in their ridiculous be-flagged pickups, and how some nearby restuarant diners had rushed her into the restuarant, and the staff there had hid her in the pantry, and all the diners lied and said they hadn't seen her. My teacher read Anne Frank to us in 6th grade. Do they still read that in schools?

-I think about that time I went into a DMV and the woman behind the counter told me to "sit over there," next to two men, and well away from the other patrons. Then a highway patrol officer came over and told us to go with him. In the parking lot he explained that he'd been called to take us to an immigration detention center. But instead he directed us to a "safe" DMV 40 miles away and walked away muttering about having had it up to here with those idiots in there. The two American Samoan men started laughing. Honestly, I didn't feel like laughing. I didn't feel like anything. I was thinking about the mission school and wondering if the detention center looked like it had.

-I've spent the last couple of weeks handing out flyers in different languages. I don't use an interpreter. I have no way of knowing if I can trust them. But somehow I manage to convey to the people I visit in field hand huts and steamy laundries that they are in a sanctuary state and what that means. That no one in our offices will turn them away or turn them in. At least I hope Im conveying that. Then I tell them, using paper language dictionaries if needed (librarians are superheros) how to get away, who to talk to, how to find the big dipper. I think a lot of my high school history teacher and those faded numbers on his wrist.

Oh I know they're coming for me first. Im your canary.

[desertteagles]

╰───► like it’s our last - e. williams

drabble.

Pairing - bbf!ellie x fem! reader

Synopsis- your brothers back from college and he brings his best friend since childhood back with him. you’ve realized you have a crush on her and sworn you wouldn’t act on it, fearing your brothers disapproval. ellie also has been harboring feelings for you but promised to not make a move per your brothers request.. especially since ellie’s kind of a player.

warnings- no smut this time </3 but little angst ig…, uhhhh idk i think that’s it.. was gonna make this a oneshot (that’s why the punctuation is sorta kinda good) but i decided NAWT to so here !

a/n well um… hi guys ! i’ve been gone for a year my bad chat 😞

U nfortunately, today was the fucking day. Now, usually, you’re happy whenever your brother decides to visit home, but this time he’s bringing an unwanted (very wanted) guest that you’ve been kind of avoiding, in order to not run your big ass mouth.

Ellie was annoying as fuck. That didn’t stop you from developing a crush on her, though, and you hated yourself for it. It was just... she’s so pretty with her stupid green eyes and veiny hands, and her pretty hair that’s always in that fuckass bun, and her... “Wait, what the fuck. Stop thinking about her, oh my god,” you groaned, putting your face in your hands. Unsurprisingly, you could never seem to keep her from getting stuck in your mind. It was a never-ending cycle of “I don’t even like her; she just has a nice face,” to “Why the fuck am I lying? I want her so bad,” battling it out in your head ever since you realized there might be something more than just annoyance toward her because she was your brother's best friend. Which also opens a whole new can of worms that you really don’t have the mental capacity to deal with.

You see, your brother is very, very, very overprotective. It was so bad that you couldn’t even bring up liking celebrities around him, which was absurd, so you had to tell him to back off (he never really did). Ellie, being the player that she is, definitely tried to get your brother's blessing to pursue you back in high school, but he naturally shot her down with a vicious and explicitly detailed description of how he’d kill her and hide the body if she ever tried anything with you, which effectively scared her from even looking at you for a while. Obviously, that didn’t last long because she became this annoying nuisance of a human being, and it ground your gears until she finally left for college with your brother, giving you a much-needed break.

the break didn’t last long because for some odd reason you thought it was the greatest fucking idea to stalk her social media. Granted, you did it out of hate (it wasn’t hate) so it’s really not your fault that seeing her posts made you start looking at her in a different light. But now she was back. And this time, you have this added knowledge that she’s hot as fuck and you don’t really think you will be able to function around her.

You paced around your room, hands in your hair, agonizing over what the fuck to wear ever since you learned Ellie was visiting with your brother today. It was like some kind of cosmic joke — the universe giving you just enough time to forget how much you liked her before slamming her right back into your life.

You could hear the muffled sound of your brother’s laugh from downstairs. Your stomach twisted, nerves kicking in. You peeked out of your bedroom window and, sure enough, there was Ellie, leaning against the car, hands shoved in her pockets, that fuckass bun sitting low on her head. She was talking to your brother, but you barely registered him — all you could focus on was her smirk, the way her eyes squinted when she laughed, how the light from the sun caught on her freckles. Now that made you make a face, “ew why the fuck am i thinking like a poet.”

“Gotdammit,” you muttered to yourself. “Get it the fuck together.”

Your heart was racing, but you couldn't tell if it was from excitement or dread. Maybe both…. definitely both.

A sharp knock on your door yanked you out of your thoughts, and before you could even answer, your brother barged in. “Hey, Ellie’s here,” he said, grinning like an idiot. “Come down and say hi, don’t be weird.”

You raised an eyebrow. “I’m not the weird one, you are. and plus i have to finish getting ready! i’ll be down in a second, get out!”

He rolled his eyes. “Just be normal for like five minutes, when you come down okay? I know you guys have this weird rivalry or whatever the fuck but its been like a year so please.”

“fine, but if she starts her shit don’t say anything.” you mumbled, closing the door behind him and leaning against it. “fuck me.” you sighed and turned to finish getting ready.

—

As soon as you hit the bottom step, Ellie’s eyes locked on yours. That familiar spark of mischief shined in her gaze. She tilted her head slightly, grinning in that infuriatingly, cocky way that always made your knees a littttle weak.

“Hey,” she said, her voice soft but teasing, as if she already knew the effect she had on you. Which she couldn’t know… right? Right.

You swallowed hard, trying to act unfazed. “Ellie.”

Her grin widened, and for a split second, you could’ve sworn she looked you up and down. Almost like she was checking you out. weird. “Long time no see,” she said, stepping forward and pulling you into a quick, unexpected hug.

Your brain short-circuited for a moment, and when she let go, you were left standing there, blinking like an idiot, your skin buzzing from where her hands had briefly touched your back.

“It’s barely been a year. but yeah, long time,” you managed, trying desperately to sound casual but instead sounding like a dying cat.

—

The next couple of hours were spent catching up and you watching ellie and your brother play Call of duty.. or was it fortnite? you can’t really remember. all you can seem to focus on is how ellie’s hands look around the controller and how good they’d look around your ne- “hey. are you.. okay?” you jumped a little at being pulled from your thoughts by ellie and slowly realized how long you were staring at her hands. “oh um yea.. totally,” you chuckled nervously and turned your attention back to the TV trying to ignore Ellie's burning gaze on the side of your face. Like usual, your brother was oblivious to anything but that damn game, trash talking like crazy, while you kept sneaking looks at Ellie after that embarrassing ass moment. She didn’t seem to mind though; in fact, she seemed to enjoy catching you staring. Every time you glanced her way, she was already looking, a knowing smirk tugging at the corner of her lips.

At one point, you found yourself in the kitchen, you were hungry as fuck and being a third wheel didn’t exactly curb your hunger. Unfortunately, Ellie walked in not too long after you, her presence immediately making the room feel smaller.

“So,” she said, dragging the o and leaning against the counter with that same smirk. “You’ve been avoiding me.”

You froze, almost crushing a chip that was making its way into your mouth in your hand. “What!? No, I haven’t. You're actually delusional, I don't know.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Rightttt. I'm totally delusional.”

You turned to look at her, grabbing another chip out of the bag to eat before pausing and saying, “Okay, maybe I have. But it’s not purposefully !”

Ellie took a step closer, and you had to force yourself to keep breathing. “Oh really?”

“Yes really! I have literally no reason to avoid you. Don’t be dumb. i’ve just been busy with getting my esthetician license.. ” You bit your lip, trying and failing to seem calm. God, this was the exact situation you were trying to avoid. You wanted to tell her off, make her stop questioning you, but honestly… you kinda missed her (you’d never admit this out loud) and it was nice talking to her. Not to mention looking at her lips while she talked was one of your favorite pastimes.

Ellie took another step forward, so close now that you could smell her — that familiar mix of leather and something earthy. It was distracting as hell, and you loved hated it. You took a deep breath, trying to calm the pounding in your chest.

“Busy with your esthetician license, huh?” Ellie’s voice was low, almost mocking, as if she knew how much of a lie that sounded like, even if it was mostly true. “that’s hilarious because you seemed to have plenty of time to stare at my hands earlier.”

Your face burned instantly. “I wasn’t staring,” you blurted, probably a little too fast.

Ellie’s smirk widened, her eyes flicking down to your hands fidgeting with the chip bag. “Sure you weren’t.” She was enjoying this way too much, but instead of leaving you to drown in embarrassment, she stepped even closer, her gaze suddenly more intense, less mocking. “You know, I don’t typically care if you stare.”

Your brain completely short-circuited. Was she for real? You swallowed hard, your heart hammering in your chest as you decided it’s now or never and maybe it’s time to give her a taste of her own medicine.

You leaned in, your eyes locked on hers, and for a moment, the playful tension between you both shifted into something else — something heavier. “is that right?” you whispered, your voice barely above a murmur as you tucked a loose strand behind her ear with a smirk.

Ellie’s breath hitched and you saw a blush spread across her face like crazy. She was not expecting you to reciprocate her teasing. In fact, she thought you would get too flustered to even think. You giggled at her stunned face, body still alight with nerves and your mind screaming did i really just do that??? The room felt impossibly small, and you couldn’t focus on anything but how close she was. You could feel the heat radiating off her skin, the way her gaze flickered down to your lips for just a second before snapping back to your eyes.

“I—” you started, but before you could even finish, your brother’s voice cut through the tension like a knife, causing you to jump back from Ellie in surprise.

“Ellie, you better be keeping your hands to yourself…” he called from the living room, his tone half-joking but you could tell he wasn’t.

Ellie groaned in annoyance at the interruption. She raised her hand as if to hold yours but faltered at your confused expression, and dropped it with a sigh “Yeah, yeah,” she muttered, her voice quieter now, as she turned toward the living room. “Jesus Christ.”

[possessedmen]

Haunted love

Elliot pushed open the door to their apartment, the familiar creak a comforting sound after a long day. The place was dim, lit only by the soft glow of a single lamp, casting shadows that danced on the walls. There, sprawled out on the chair with one foot up on the table like he owned the place, was Marco—or at least, Marco's body. But Elliot knew it was Lucas, the ghost of a previous tenant who had taken over Marco during their last explosive fight, possessing him when he wanted to slap Elliot.

"Hey, babe, you're finally home," Marco's voice was husky, playful, with that dark edge that was all Lucas. Elliot's heart raced, not just from the sight of Marco's foot, so invitingly displayed, but from the knowledge that Lucas was in control, making this homecoming charged with desire.

Elliot dropped his bag by the door, his eyes locked on Marco's foot, the arch so perfectly curved, the skin so smooth. "Damn, his body suits you so good," he said, his voice low as he approached, a smirk playing on his lips. He knew Lucas was exaggerating Marco's act, playing into his known weakness for feet, making this moment even more charged.

The ghost, through Marco's lips, let out a low, lustful chuckle, the sound more human than ever, laced with a hint of playful perversion. "I've been waiting for you, babe. You know how much I love having your attention on me like this," he replied, his voice thick with desire, his eyes gleaming with a naughty glint.

Marco chuckled, a sound that vibrated through the room, sending shivers down Elliot's spine. "I've been waiting for you, babe. Been thinking about your hands on me all day," he teased, wiggling his toes in a way that was both innocent and provocative.

Kneeling down, Elliot took Marco's foot in his hands, the warmth of his skin seeping into his palms. He began to worship it, his lips and tongue exploring every inch with devotion. But Lucas, ever the kinky instigator, had other plans. As Elliot focused on one foot, Marco's other foot slipped between Elliot's legs, finding the hard bulge in his pants. With a knowing smirk, Lucas began to massage Elliot's tenting bulge through the fabric, the pressure and movement sending waves of pleasure through him.

"You're driving me crazy," Elliot gasped, his hands tightening around Marco's ankle, his kisses growing more fervent on the foot he was worshipping.

Marco's laugh was low, seductive. "That's the idea, babe. I know what you like," he said, his voice full of perverted delight. The foot on Elliot's crotch moved with precision, teasing and taunting, while the one being worshipped was treated to a loving, sensual exploration.

As the pleasure built, Elliot couldn't help but voice his thoughts. "I prefer you like this, you know," he murmured against Marco's skin, his breath hot. "You're so much better than the real Marco ever was. I’m so grateful that you saved me by possessing that cheating bastard."

The ghost leaned forward, Marco's eyes twinkling with a kinky light. "I can't believe he fumbled a guy like you, babe. That asshole did not deserve you," he breathed out, his voice dripping with a seductive promise, his foot flexing under Elliot's touch in a silent plea for more.

As Elliot continued his passionate worship, his hands and lips exploring with an intensity that matched the ghost's desire, the air around them grew thick with lust. "I've been thinking about this all day," the ghost confessed, his tone both loving and lascivious, promising a night filled with the kind of intimacy Elliot craved.

In this moment, the distinction between ghost and man blurred. It was just Elliot and Marco, or what Marco had become, sharing a connection that was deeply human, wildly erotic, and utterly theirs. The air was thick with anticipation, their casual evening turning into a night of unbridled passion.

[whereserpentswalk]

Children are no longer legally allowed to exist.

Human reproduction was the last of the major functions of the human body to be technologically replaced. Sleep has been cut down to less then an hour a day, the digestive system has been altered so a modern person can eat as much or as little as they want, and gain and lose as much weight as they want, without producing waste. Even aging is no longer something done by those who don’t want it. It only made sense that the luxury of the modern world would eventually outmode the cruel and diminutive state of childhood.

A modern person will be conceived artificially, possibly with thousands of individuals contributing to their genetic code, and grown in a large tube from the age of minus nine months to the age of eighteen. For nearly nineteen years they will lack any sentient thought, being put in a state on anesthesia until they come of age. It is considered unethical and inhumane under international law to allow a human being to exist in a larval state.

Before being awoken, people have knowledge of basic education that in previous generations would be covered by years of schooling. They are also given basic knowledge to exist as an adult. Most people are awoken as students within universities, their first experience being their initiation into school and their freshmen year, their first home being their dorms. In some places companies are allowed to awaken humans as workers, which is not legally slavery because people are allowed to leave the jobs they’re awoken into, even if they’re not told they are able to. In times of war people will sometimes be given a pre awakening conscription, meaning they’re actively awoken as new recruits in basic training. Eugenics isn’t legal, but there’s not much oversight for if a company or military organization tends to awaken more people with physical traits they prefer.

Without children the world looks a lot different then it did in when they were around. Those who remember when the transition was made can talk about a world with empty playgrounds, and toy stores without customers. But now the world is completely without anything catering to children. Those who argue for the return of children to the world are met with just how little exists for them in this world. There are no safety standards with children in mind, no ratings on movies, nothing made in child’s size save for a few accommodations for dwarfs. Every piece of media is made with an audience of exclusively adults in mind, even things like plushes or action figures are designed for adult collectors, not children who would play with them. There are some superstitious people who think doll eyes have always looked a bit sadder since they last children grew up.

Since children are no longer legally allowed to exist, the means to physically produce them has been removed from human bodies. Long before any human in awakened the organs that would be used to reproduce are removed through painless surgery, and the ability to desire sex is whipped from their minds. It makes things easier. And likewise it’s safer, just as the removal of children meant the removal of the abuse of children, the removal of sex means the removal of sexual predation.

People in a way have a type of freedom without sexual attraction that they wouldn’t back when it existed. People can touch or cuddle each other in any way they want without it being weird, people can dress how they want, women don’t fear men the way they used to. It’s possible these things could still happen within a species with sexual attraction but we never got there, and the education implanted into people’s minds before they awakening certainly teaches one as leading to the other. There are still a few people who do still have some amount of those feelings, but they’re considered a statistical anomaly and are encouraged not to talk about or act on such things.

There is a feeling of emptiness in some people who remember the world when children existed, like something is missing. Even some people born long after children were outlawed sometimes feel an emptiness. Some people get pets if they have a instinct to take care of something, though humans are the only mammal to survive the great plague, there are lizards and birds and snakes and small robots that can keep people company. Some people take on apprentices that they can grow extremely close to them, often having relationships that reflect a parent’s relationship to an older child. There are even some subcultures where people will form relationships where one person will pay for another’s expenses for nothing in return, and allow that person to live with them without any employment, which some theorize in a mirror of parenthood. There are even some people who practice types of sensual acts that seem to mirror the mating process humans once had, even if they’d never seen such acts. It’s like these things are part of us, even when we don’t have the things these emotions were meant to interface with, like an animal still having a cry to alert for a long extinct predator.

Children are one of those things a lot of people think they might be happier if they got to live in a world with, but legalizing them just never seemed practical or ethical. There isn’t really any major political ideology that wants to bring them back, it’s not something people think about. People talk about children like they do swords, something that once was, but is not thought of in the context of fantasy. And perhaps that is how it will be. People will have their normal adult lives, and life will go on, and people will still have happy memories, and still write books, and still look at sunsets, and still sing songs, even without them.

There are some people who believe you can hear the ghosts of children in certain places, their laughter ringing in people’s ears in lonely spots near ancient parks. Psychologists haven’t yet figured out why every culture possesses such a superstition.

[sammysdewysensitiveeyes]

Okay, I greatly appreciate the discussion here about the need for interdisciplinary work in academia, and the need to reach outside of academia and talk to specialists when looking at the uses of tools, but somehow people always have to turn this into a "gotcha!" where the stuffy academics get shown up (even though this very thread shows some archeologists reaching out to craftspeople to ask about how tools are used because they recognize the need for that knowledge and expertise).

"A hairdresser comes a long, looks at a few and is like, “Yeah, they’re sewn.”

“Don’t be silly!” the archaeologists cry. “How foolish, sewn hair indeed! LOL!”

So she went away and recreated them on real people using a needle and thread and the mystery of Roman hairstyles was solved."

Did they? Did they really? The archeologists all laughed at the plucky hairdresser and then she proved her theory by simply recreating the styles?

See, what actually happened is that Janet Stephens (the hairdresser/hair archeologist in this post), who published an article about her theory in The Journal of Roman Archeology in 2008, spent about 6 years of research pursuing her idea that perhaps Roman hairstyles were sewn hair and not wigs. She did both hands-on experimentation sewing the actual hair, and more traditional research reading through a ton of sources. This is coming from an interview done with Stephens herself:

"Lots and lots of reading, poring over exhibition catalogs, back searching the footnotes to the reading and reading some more! It helped that I am fluent in Italian and, in 2006, I took a German for reading class. Working in my spare time, the research took 6 years."

"I am an independent researcher, but my husband is a professor of Italian at the Johns Hopkins University, so I have library privileges there. We are friendly with colleagues in the Classics/Archaeology department and at the Walters Art Museum. They were kind enough to send me articles and clippings, read drafts and help with some picky Latin, though I try not to impose."

(Source: http://www.thehistoryblog.com/archives/14729)

Wow, so people in the Classics/Archeology department and at the art museum sent her articles and clippings and HELPED her with her research as opposed to laughing at her in their gentleman's club! It's almost like people working the archeology/art history these days aren't all stuffy old white guys from the 1950's!

Stephens also presented her work at the Archeological Institute of America Conference, and according to the interview I cited above, it was apparently well received: "It seemed to create a a lot of buzz and people said they enjoyed it. It’s not every conference where you go to the poster session and see “heads on pikestaffs”!"

Like, there's plenty to be said about the ivory tower and the need for interdisciplinary work, and the racism/sexism etc. that newer researchers are working against, but framing this story as "hairdresser totally shows up the archeologists with her common sense!" is needlessly shitting on the academics involved here (and the humanities in general have been struggling to maintain funding at many universities in the US, they don't need to be further attacked), as well as greatly over-simplifying and downplaying Janet Stephens' achievement. I think it's more respectful to acknowledge the six years of work that she put into the project than to tell the story like she just sewed some hair and then all the archeologists' monocles popped out.

Something I find incredibly cool is that they’ve found neandertal bone tools made from polished rib bones, and they couldn’t figure out what they were for for the life of them. 

Until, of course, they showed it to a traditional leatherworker and she took one look at it and said “Oh yeah sure that’s a leather burnisher, you use it to close the pores of leather and work oil into the hide to make it waterproof. Mine looks just the same.” 

“Wait you’re still using the exact same fucking thing 50,000 years later???”

“Well, yeah. We’ve tried other things. Metal scratches up and damages the hide. Wood splinters and wears out. Bone lasts forever and gives the best polish. There are new, cheaper plastic ones, but they crack and break after a couple years. A bone polisher is nearly indestructible, and only gets better with age. The more you use a bone polisher the better it works.”

It’s just. 

50,000 years. 50,000. And over that huge arc of time, we’ve been quietly using the exact same thing, unchanged, because we simply haven’t found anything better to do the job. 

[17magpiesinatrenchcoat]

some guys in my oc story I’ve been meaning to design :> hehehhe

yes these are my repurposed hk gijinkas. they have nothing in common with hk any more so it’s ok

some stuff about them:

hollie, they/them, 19

superstition and fear given form, and eventually personhood. ironically, they are in denial about this fact and very superstitious and fearful themself. they can mimic others’ powers to a much weaker extent. they cannot speak or open their mouth normally due to their mouth and throat being replaced by much less human anatomy. kind of a stoner. extremely chill most of the time as long as you don’t bring up what lies beyond the town. not very expressive, it takes a LOT to change their expression from what I drew here.

nettle, she/her, 14

fae statue in an old ruin who, being the form of a little girl, one day got bored protecting said ruins and decided to become a human instead. still retains some aspect of her previous form, with her scars healing over in gold akin to kintsugi, and being able to warp and manipulate gold as she pleases. likes sewing together old things and doing questionable things in search of knowledge, much like her father. (raine!! mad scientist librarian guy who I will draw too soonish hopefully)

[melanieathene]

Thy Will Be Done

I didn’t understand much of anything when I was Jack, just Jack, Lucifer’s new-born son. Everything was new to me. I was new to myself. I didn’t know if I was good or bad, I simply was. And who knows what I might have become, had Cas not been there for me from the start.

Cas... and the Winchesters. Three father figures for the orphan who had expected none. Not that Dean trusted me at first. And who could blame him? Power without reason or control is a scary thing. But he trusted Cas, and that gave me the hope that he would someday come to trust me too.

That trust was not easily won. There were far too many setbacks, too many times when he hated me, even wanted to kill me. But nevertheless, in his own gruff way, Dean taught me duty, respect — and who better to teach me righteousness than the Righteous Man himself.

Sam gave me friendship. He taught me patience, diligence, and nurtured my insatiable thirst for knowledge.

And Cas? Cas taught me love. Free and pure, love flowed from him to Sam, to Dean, to me — you did not have to be an angel to see it. He was my protector. He believed in me when I did not even believe in myself.

We were a strange, dysfunctional family. But we were family. All four of us believed that.

And then Cas was taken by the Empty...

And, soon after that, I became God. All Chuck’s power, all His knowledge poured into me. And because my three fathers had helped shape the man I was, so too they shaped the God that I became: kind and just; forgiving and peaceful; all knowing and, most of all, full of love.

I loved all of my adoptive fathers. I loved all of the humans and angels now in my care. But, most of all, I loved Cas. Although I had become the Father of All, still he was my father. There was so much more he had to teach me...

I could not be without him. And so, I took him from the Empty. He and those whose names he spoke of with the greatest longing, with the deepest affection: Joshua, Balthazar, Anna, Gabriel, Samandriel. These angels all became my trusted lieutenants as we began to reform Heaven into all that a heaven should be, but Cas was my right hand man. I trusted his opinion above all others. And in all things we were were in complete agreement, save for one crucial matter...

Earth was for living humans. That was my firm belief, and so it became my law. Earth did not require divine intervention. It had seen far too much of that under my predecessor's reign. I would keep an eye on the happenings there, of course, but it was off limits to the angels. This was hard for Cas to accept. He raged, he wept, but I could not — would not — allow any exceptions. Not even for my favourite father. Over and over, he begged to become human himself, but this too I would not allow. I needed him by my side.

For a while, all was well. Great progress was made. Angels and human souls worked together, and perfect harmony prevailed.

In all hearts but one...

Castiel’s.

Clearly, the greater portion of his heart remained on Earth, with one human in particular.

I once naively thought there were limitations on love: the heart is only so big; it has room for only a select few. As God, my comprehension expanded to encompass love for all. But, what I initially failed to understand, is that there are different types of love — and while all of them are true, not all of them are equal.

Cas loved me as a son.

Cas loved Sam as a brother.

But Dean... Ah, that was a different story.

I had always known that Cas loved Dean but, only now, as I saw the omnipresent sadness on his face, did I begin to understand the fathomless depths of that great love. The desire that lay behind it. The passion, the longing for more. The sad conviction that it could never be. The acknowledgement that love, unrequited, was the cruelest love of all.

But I also knew something that he did not know: Dean loved him too.

Something in Dean died when the Empty stole Cas away. He tried to hide it; he had no time to lose himself to grief with the world to save. And, after that war was won, he put on a brave show. He buried his feelings deep. He forced a smile on his face and lived each day as if it were a gauntlet he had to run.

He was tired. Bone-deep weary.

When the vampire’s attack impaled him on a protruding nail, Dean welcomed death as an old friend. He didn’t pray. He thought the angel he had always prayed to was lost to him forever. What further use had he for prayer? He believed the nail to be a fatal blow, that it saved him from the slow death that was his life.

And I — I who could have healed him with a thought, who could have given Sam’s mind the tiny nudge it needed to override Dean’s protests and call the paramedics — I let him die.

As Dean had always suspected I might be, I was the instrument of his death. My will, not the nail, ended his days on Earth. Because Cas needed to be with him, and Dean needed Cas too. How could I stand by and watch them both suffer needlessly?

And so Dean came to Heaven.

It took a while for Cas to forgive me for that. It took longer still for him to overcome his fear of facing Dean, of hearing what Dean’s response to his ill-timed declaration might be.

But when that reply came, when Dean confessed his love...

The joy it sparked in my heart to see them come together was unlike anything I had ever known, but the joy that flared between them shone brighter than the brightest star.

And so I left them to their happy reunion. Holding each other tight. Locked in a lover’s embrace. Trading kisses and murmuring tender words that had been denied for far too long.

And I looked upon what I had wrought and, lo, it was very good.

* * *

Also posted to AO3. Come and visit me there!

[corishadowfang]

            One of the Foretellers had come for Mary’s daughter, today.

            It wasn’t often that they did; most children were sent off to Daybreak Town on the promise of sending money back to their family, or of getting a better future, or because the village had no magic users to protect them and they needed someone.  There were no big ceremonies or flashy goodbyes; there were small farewell parties, sometimes, or tiny little familial blessings, asking that Light may guide them safely and Darkness hide them from all that would do harm.  But a Foreteller had come, for Elaine, for Mary’s little girl, and the town had scrambled to put something together.

            It was—an honor, really.  Mary knew this.  It was why she’d set the table with the finest dinnerware they owned—an old set, heirlooms, from a time when there had been less strife—and asked her mother to help her prepare a large dinner, and had wrung her hands as she’d tried to stay polite and proud and keep her wringing hands underneath the table.

            Master Ava had been a polite and accommodating guest.  Mary had thought, at first, that she’d seemed almost awkward at the attention—but that seemed an absurd thought, when Master Ava was a Foreteller.  Everyone had heard the stories—of the heroes who had risen from a town on the edge of daybreak, wielding weapons borne of themselves and slaying the monsters that had so long seemed impossible to defeat.  She was more than human; how could Mary expect her to feel something so normal as uncertainty?             (She’s young, some part of her whispered—some part of her that could not quite stay quiet—and she did her best to hush the thought.  It was dangerous; she could not afford to think it.)

            “I’ve heard that you’re interested in magic,” Master Ava said, turning her focus mostly to Elaine.

            Mary’s skin prickled, and across the table, her mother shifted, like she wished to interject but thought better of it.

            Elaine either didn’t notice or didn’t care; she beamed, eyes brightening as she said, “Yeah!  I’ve been studying.  Mister Gavin says he thinks I might replace him one day.”

            Mary squeezed her eyes shut.  They are not taking our only mage, she thought, and it was close enough to the truth that she didn’t have to think about the consequences.  Gavin was old, but alive; they would not be left defenseless if Elaine became a wielder.  If anything, this was a better opportunity for her; she would go and train with some of the best mages in the world, and then she could bring back her knowledge here, to fend against the shades that encroached on their borders.

            (Elaine was still losing her baby teeth; Mary could hear the lisp.  She tried not to think about that, too.)

            “That’s good; I’m glad to hear it.”

            “Keyblade wielders are good at magic, right?”

            Mary could not see Master Ava’s face, and it chafed.  “Some of us are.”

            That was a lie; all of them were, compared to the average person.  Most mages trained for years, and even then, they might only be average at best; a newly-fledged wielder could use magic on par with the best almost instantly.  ‘Some’ was only relevant in comparison to other wielders.

            “So if I go with you, I could get better?”

            “Yes.  Good enough to keep your whole village safe.”

            (“You heard about Marty’s kid, didn’t you?”

            Mary hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, but she’d stalled, hesitating just out of sight as she’d come to collect Elaine from Gavin’s shop.

            Gavin’s expression had hardened, and he hadn’t said anything.

            “Went off to Daybreak Town—that’s what he said.  Got letters for a while, and then things slowly just…stopped.  They haven’t heard from him since.”

            “I think,” Gavin had said, glancing back toward the shop—toward Elaine, who was still studying inside, “that you’d best stop spreading rumors.  All you’re going to do is scare people.”)

            It was a given, that Elaine would go; Mary couldn’t reasonably deny a Foreteller (even if Elaine was a child, even if they needed as many mages as they could get, even if things were dangerous), and Elaine was too excited to even consider turning down the invitation.  But still, a pit opened in Mary’s stomach as she knelt in front of her daughter, tangling a stained glass pendant around her neck.  It was one they’d made together, and Mary was only willing to part with it because she hoped it would grant her daughter some sort of protection.  “May Light’s blessings fall on you,” she said, because if she said anything less formal, she might sweep her daughter back into her room and refuse to let her go—even at the demands of a Foreteller.  “May Darkness guard you from the eyes of all who would seek to do you harm.”

            And may the Great Heart welcome you, should you find yourself in need of rest.

            She couldn’t bring herself to say the last part.

            Elaine’s nose scrunched, like she thought it was funny that her mother was saying such things, but Master Ava’s hand landed on Elaine’s shoulder and tightened, and Mary, strangely, got the impression that she understood.  “I’ll take care of her,” she promised.

            Mary didn’t know if it was true.  She didn’t think it mattered.  In the end, she still had to watch her daughter walk down the road, bouncing excitedly as she chattered to a stranger in elaborate robes.

            “It’ll be alright,” her own mother said, even if she didn’t entirely sound like she believed it.  “The Foretellers are blessed; they’ll protect them.”

            (They did not hear from Elaine again.)

[crownmemes]

Supernatural & Paranormal Sentences, Vol. 12

(Sentences from various sources for muses exploring the unexplained. Adjust phrasing where needed)

"There's an explanation for everything, but people would rather believe in ghosts and demons."

"Okay, great, now you're scared away the werewolf!"

"If I were you, I might consider that not all knowledge is worth having."

"Do you ever have one of those moments where suddenly you understand everything?"

"Put your flashlight on. Zombies hate bright light."

"There are no mysteries. Not anymore."

"All I know is that I was dead and now I'm not, and that everything has changed for me."

"Have you ever conducted an exorcism of a child?"

"There's darkness in the forest. Nightmares you can't even begin to imagine. Things we were never meant to see."

"I don't need an exorcism!"

"You can't enter into time, but sometimes time can try to enter into the present - break in, burst through and take things."

"Those things, they walk, they never run - you ever notice that? It's like they're taking their time because they know there's only so many places we can go."

"Do you know why you're afraid when you're alone? I do."

"I see dead people."

"Have you been reading the conspiracy theories?"

"I followed these visions for the last five years because I thought they were real. Now, I'm not sure."

"At some point, you either adapt, or you lose your mind."

"I think that's why you're sad. You can't figure it out anymore. Things have gotten weird, and you don't like it."

"Ghosts don't have nervous breakdowns!"

"Why does everything have to be understandable? Why can't some things be unacceptable and we just say that?"

"You know how sometimes you dream and you forget, but then later you start to remember, and you realise that it wasn't a dream and all of it maybe really happened?"

"Try not to get into any trouble, and don't kill any demons without me!"

"Life isn't all tarot cards and pagan blood glyphs, you know!"

"I don't trust these people. There's something really weird here."

"I wasn't hallucinating, trust me! I've done a fuck ton of drugs; I know what hallucinations feel like, and this was different!"

"Do you really believe you see demons and devils?"

"Do you ever know something and don't know how you know it?"

"There are more things possible on this earth than you could ever dream of."

"Do ghosts always tell the truth? Are they trustworthy?"

"Time itself is in danger."

"I told you that place was haunted, but you wouldn't believe me, would you?"

"You know, before I started working with you, I was a normal person. I never questioned my sanity."

"Maybe you don't have a real face. Not the human kind, anyway. Am I right?"

"How long has it been haunting this place?"

"Do you think what happened to you is a miracle?"

"No one expects a ghost to punch them on the jaw!"

"Time is not as rigid a concept as most people would believe."

"As scientists, we have to acknowledge when something is beyond our knowledge."

"There are two things we are charged with in this life: living with our mistakes, and endeavouring to learn from them."

"People like the idea of conspiracies. It makes life easier, don't you think?"

"You're hunting for a man, but you need to start hunting for a beast."

[bean-spring]

You can understand Helena's complexity, the reasons behind her actions and the inherent connection between her and Mark that is clearly there beyond questioning if she's Helly or not ("that sort of kinship carry over from innie to outie"), because at the end of the day, she is her (in different circumstances and enviornments).

But that doesn't mean that outside of the poetry and natural attraction between them there isn't the whole question of whether this is right or wrong. It isn't just "this is rape and she's inherently and utterly evil" or "they're the same person and she's also hurt, so it's okay" because that would minimize what the show is working so hard on. And that is fucking with our heads making us wonder who we truly are, what things would make us commit these actions, what truly is freedom, and at what point we stop being ourselves.

Let me make this clear (it's just my opinion): No, it wasn't consensual. Mark didn't consent to having sex with Helena. He thought it was Helly. That part is obvious to everyone. The whole "he said he doesn't care who she is outside, but he cares who she is with him, so it is consensual!" doesn't matter when he actually doesn't know who the fuck she is. He is being lied to. He said that because he thought he was talking to his Helly and didn't care who she was outside because, at the end of the day, despite being the same people, innies are practically born again (socially) and build a personality and experiences from the very beginning, from their very first memory that is appearing in the office (Dan literally refers to this point of their lives as "adolescense" while S1 was "childhood"). And they keep fighting for their rights and individual freedom.

I don't think we're giving this its proper depth, tbh. It isn't just "Helena wasn't Helly here". It's: Helena has way more knowledge than Mark has, while Mark believes they're both on the same page. Helena went there hoping for an experience in specific with him (selfishly), while for Mark it happened way more organically. Helena has said she doesn't view innies as human and has been watching them as if they were a Sims 4 gameplay. For Mark, it's Helly and the fact that their connection goes beyond that night while for Helena it's not that much about Mark himself. There is a clear, obvious power difference in here and she is, after all, for now, one of the antagonists. We can't forget that.

But it isn't just "evil" or "bad" or "cruel". Because Helena, due to the lack of freedom in her own life, is in the same place (in a different enviornment, though and turning that into power over others instead) as them. She longs for a human connection she has never experienced before. She is broken and torn apart about who she truly is. She uses Mark to experience this, yes, but at what point does that turn into real attraction? At what point her jealousy towards her innie and dehumanization of both herself and the group turns into her also realizing she's the same and understanding Mark? At what point does Mark fall for and embrace the kinship that connects Helly/Helena (that guilt and shame and lack of freedom and yearning for love) instead of just seeing double? At what point does Helena stop seeing a chance to experience love to start seeing... Just Mark?

And after ALL OF THAT it still doesn't make it okay to do what she did.

In the most natural, poetic, human perception of this scene, there is a connection between no matter who they are. But memories and shared experiences are also a huge part of ourselves, we do change with them. Both Mark and Helly have said multiple times that they don't see themselves as an extension of their outies and are their own selves. It doesn't matter whether they are the same or not, it's how they see it. Mark never agreed to share his body with Helena specifically and that's taking away from him the chance of choosing individually. His freedom.

In my opinion it was 100% rape but it's way deeper than just that. It's still awful, though, and we have to start learning to embrace complex characters and try to understand them without only being guided by our IRL moral compass.

[let-gavin-free]

So I currently have 3 rooks. I took this and RAN.

These got long so read more!

Lorant Mercar (Shadow Dragon - Trans Man - Elf - 32 - Mage - Orphan x2 - LI: Lucanis ):

He’d be lost after the exile. This would mean he lost a family, once again, and he’d probably struggle with idea of finding another. He’d concider the Dalish clan he did his Dalish studies with, thanks to his mother, but he’d still want to help the world - doing something. Hed heard about the grey wardens and concider it before confirming it would be the last resort for him. And then he remembered about the south. The whisperings some months ago about the Inquisitor, a secret ally of the Dragons. The Inquisitor Lavellan would be bound to make his way over any day now, if he timed the next meeting right. He’d ask him to take him in, offer any help to him and whatever he was doing. There were rumored stories of the Inquisition full of castaways that the Dalish leader took in, no questions asked. Hed hope they were right.

And they were, in a way. The Inquisition bad been disbanded but Lavellans clan was the gate way to freedom for most freed enslaved Dalish the Dragons had freed. Mahanon agreed to taking him IF Lorant provided anything he could to the operation of aiding the newly freed.

And he was in. Immediately. Working the other side of a job he knew every in and out of, fullfilled him. Hed work with Mahanon, to prove himself to the former Inquisitor and now Keeper. Learning about Dalish history more through Mahanon, doing his part when there was a new job to retrieve freed slaves or help them plan other means, if needed, once safe. In game events happen and he becomes Mahanons second hand when the other elf meets Harding for information. He becomes a middle man for missives to and from the dwarf. Hed learn all he could about Solas and the Mahanons friendship inbetween the moments alone he had , so once end game events happen - he aids in the fight right beside Mahanon and Dorian. He reunites with a now blighted Viper and worried Tarquin. Hed feel awkward but in the end get closure from the two, and

And because i am a avid lover of Lucanis and believe in ‘we meet in every universe’ soulmates, he has brief moments with Lucanis in between the fights. Each one making the crow more intriguing. And once the world is saved with Solas, he walks up to Lucanis and properly introduces himself, shooting his shot. Lucsnis, thanks much to Spites insistence- agrees to a date. Meet cute, ya know?

Evunial De Riva: (Antivan Crow - Trans Man - Ex Dalish Elf - 35 - Mage - Widower - LI: Emmrich):

Hed also be lost. And depressed. First he looses his clan and pregnant wife, sending him down a spiral before finding a new family in the crows. Who, after he just proved himself to the Talons, exiles him. And he knows its not Viagos or Teias wish, but the other Talons voted it. Doesnt mean it doesnt sting. He leaves Antiva, bit by bit. First landing in Arlthan Forest and explored any ruin he could. Then hed hear whispers about Nevarras undead king, and it would intrigue him. And then hed hear about the Necropolis. And then his mind would be made. Hed put down the assassin route for now, and learn to accept the loss of his family. Then maybe, he’d pick up the cape after.

And so he travels to Navarra, and hed somehow convince the Mourn Watch to take him in. And when they do, hed work himself up. Hed go to every class and read every book. Hed learn to admire death in a more emotional way, instead of cold acceptance that only hurt him more. Hed find what he could of Dalish funerary and add in his knowledge, or what he could remember from his time as a first of his clan any way. Hed give back what he could.

And then one day, hed see Lucanis; Wandering the halls with a short elvhen woman and a large human woman. One a rogue and the other a mage. Hed follow behind before catching Lucanis’ gaze once the two women went off into a dig site. The two would shake hands, Evunial commenting on his alive status. Then hed learn about the failed ritual and the dragon attack on Treviso. And a part of him aches to aid, telling Lucanis as such, confiding in his old friend. And Lucanis, doesn’t hesitate to ask him to join. Evunial was the only one he trusted fully right now after learning of Caterinas death, said Lucanis. And Evunial doesnt hesitate in agreeing. Caterina was one Talon he admired, despite knowing it was her final say that confirmed his exile. So to at least help Lucanis get his revenge for the old woman, was enough for him.

And from there game events happened. He meets Emmrich, both laughing over the fact they never crossed paths in the halls. He aids Lucanis, avoiding on heading to Treviso each time. He gets closer to Bellara, the elven woman from before, and Davrin - a ex Dalish Grey Warden. He realizes after a harmless date with Emmrich hes in love with the necromancer. And after joining the rescue of Caterina and the fight against Illario along side Lucanis and Andi, the veilguards leader, hed show his face to Viago and Teia. And after a night of reconnecting, hed give his regards and head out of the ball, feeling a bit of closure of his relationship with the crows. Hed concider his assassin life again, after talking with Emmrich and after the end game events happened.

Andi Hawke (Lord of Fortune - Cis Woman - Human - 22 - Mage - Daughter of Adrian Hawke and Anders (adopted) - LI: Bellara)

In my canon, shes not a rook but a companion that joined from the begining. So in this she becomes Rook but still doesnt get recruited til after Varrics death. Let me explain~

The exile would hit her but shed respect her Aunt Isabella and go back home to her dads in the south. Shed tell her tales of adventure to her dads as she did her farming chores at their home in the middle of nowehere exile. She’d lessen her hoard from her lord days, selling off pieces and giving some money back to kirkwall anonymously. Shed learn of Varrics adventure from Hawke, who got a letter from the dwarf. Shed write to her uncle, begging for him to allow her to join, offering her knowledge from her days in the Lords. Shed be let down, when his reply was that he didnt want to endanger his only niece in a fight to save the world situation. But shed understand, and continue to help out Kirkwall secretly now that Varric was busy.

Then a letter from Isabella would come. Varric was dead and Andi, not wanting to believe it, left. She’d meet up with Harding and Neve in Rivain, and offered her services. Harding, who had the connection to Solas, would agree to them as long as Andi became the leader. Neve had told the dwarf about the job that exiled Andi and knowing Andi was Varrics niece, her want of Andi to be the leader was sound in her mind. Andi agreed, before panicking about the unexpected upgrade and asking her Dad for advice in leadership.

And game events happen. She pulls together this kick ass team, helping her new friends fix their shit and saving the world, all while falling in love with Bellara. (I havnt progressed much in her playthrough to give any other details about her run so this is the bare bones of this AU for Andi. HOPEFULLY this still fits the prompt lmao)

Rook Introduction Hour 2/7/25

Good morning, Veilguardians!✨ Hope your Friday is off to a beautiful start!

How it works: I ask you a question about your Rook(s) and you answer it with as much brevity or verbosity as you desire. You can do this whenever you want, and I’ll reblog it + add some comments! There’s no time limit— if you want to do the older ones, they are collected here! (The post is updated on Fridays!)

Today's Question(s): If your Rook had not been recruited by Varric after they were exiled from their faction, what would they have done? How would they have reacted to the events of the game if they weren't in a position to influence them? Would they have tried to go back to their faction? Would they have joined another? Would they have attempted to combat the gods alone?

Answer as much or as little as you like! Have fun, and thanks for sharing!

[isawken]

thing that keeps me up at night #44

neanderthals existed from about 130,000 to 40,000 years ago

homo sapiens have existed for 3000,000 years

that's 90k years of potential intermingling

that's almost an entire third of our existence, another species running parallel to us. but what were the differences? how different were their faces? their language? i was reading something that said they had less sophisticated language capabilities than us. when we interacted with them, what was it like? were our languages similar enough to get by? or as foreign as english and sumerian? the first evidence of the written word we have is from 3400 BCE. as we all know, that doesn't mean that's the first time we wrote anything down. it's just the first time we wrote something down on a tablet that survived for 5k years. the same is true for other arts. we have cave paintings as old as 45k years. that doesn't mean that's the first art ever. just the first that lasted so long.

did homo sapiens and neanderthals ever fall in love?

did they ever sit in a cave together, painting bulls and elk on the walls? did they tell each other stories? could they?

did a homo sapien and a human ever hold hands? did a homo sapien ever see a neanderthal from across the river and feel their heart thump in their chest? did a neanderthal ever caress the face of a homo sapien? did they ever look in each other's eyes and smile?

did love exist back then like it does now? when was the first time one human looked at another and thought,

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you, and only you."

we'll never know! and it fucking kills me.

we can trace language and history and biology so far back, hundreds of thousands and millions and billions of years. we know what beings 65 millions years ago looked like. we can guess when the fucking universe started.

but we can't know when the first human loved another.

i know this is saccharine and cheesy and corny but it really does keep me up at night. the indefinable aspects that make up the core human experience. how inherently unknowable they are. how inextricable they are. we can never know how our ancestors loved. but, at the end of the day, i also know that doesn't really matter, because we love how we love now, and that's more than enough.

still.

wouldn't it be nice to know where it came from?

[juaneloriginal]

silly thingy

@blackkatdraws's sillies

[featherymainffins]

Trying to remember where I first encountered humanity as a horror to see if this has a root the same way you can trace literally all of my thirst for fictional characters back to WITCH, but ngl I genuinely cannot remember anything like that.

[rearranging-deck-chairs]

hang on are cougars like panthers

[spookyboywhump]

could he have given alexei away to another deity? sent him to some place of worship for "training?" made some kinda deal where alexei gets to leave but he has to come back for a week/month or something each year or nicholas will kill him with god powers?

I like those ideas but I have a feeling Nicholas would’ve wanted to keep Alexei. To himself. Even after he grew bored of him :)