#the kicker is that ​I probably even forgot one or two

[the-blind-assassin-12]

I have a couple of the writer ?'s for you if thats ok??? thank you for answering them 🦈 Which character is the toughest to write?

💡How many WIPs do you currently have?

🔎 Does anyone beta read or edit your fics?

Hi!!! I hope you’re having a good week, anon! Of course it’s okay to ask multiple questions!! Thank you so much for sending these, and I’m sorry I didn���t get to them sooner!

🦈 Which character is the toughest to write?

I answered this the other night and basically said “most of ‘em” 😂 A handful of these guys make me second guess a lot. But if I truly had to narrow it down to just one that I found most challenging I think it would be Javi P.

💡How many wips do you have?

Why would you come for me like this?! 😂😂 TOO MANY. An innumerable amount, really, if you consider the ideas simmering on back burners. But let’s see… Resol’nare, Tidal Force, To Keep You Safe, Petrichor, Anglefish, Oracle, Survivor Blues, Kiss Me & Smile For Me, The Viper & The Wild Thing, Aphelion, Recall, Back in Town, Untitled Frankie Dog Rescue AU, Unfinished, The Long Con, Flat Circle/Twisted Game, and a handful of one shots.

So 16 series and let’s call it 4 one shots to make a nice round 20 😵‍💫 Don’t ask me about the ones I haven’t started yet. (Jk you can ask if you want I just shouldn’t be encouraged to start anything new until I finish some of these hahahaha)

🔎 Does anyone beta read or edit your fics?

So, yes and no.

@something-tofightfor & I co-write Aphelion, so we also co-edit that story. Rachael is also subjected to random snippets and sections of stories I’m working on, because I trust her to tell me if I’m on the right track or if something seems out of character or is/isn’t working.

But in terms of like a traditional beta reader who reads the whole thing before it’s posted? Nope! I just try to do a good, thorough edit, and then I fling it into the universe with reckless abandon.

[trillscienceofficer]

this is quite random i'll admit, but your latest post got me thinking: if there would have been a proper crossover between ds9 and voy (not just a cameo like in the pilot), what would you have wanted it to be plotwise?

oh that's a very very good question! Honestly I'm not even sure if I'd want a proper, non-permanent (like, no one from DS9 gets stuck on Voyager) crossover episode, because imho it's hard to make them work well. But I can still see several options here:

it's a pre-Caretaker situation: we see the (OG) Voyager crew get the help of several officers and the Defiant in order to sneak up on the Maquis (Chakotay, B'Elanna and Tuvok), which we also follow as they try to outmaneuver Starfleet. I would love to see where Sisko and (a just promoted) Janeway agree and disagree on how to be in command, and I would love to also learn what kind of history Chakotay and B'Elanna (and Seska!) had with DS9 (did they know about Eddington? were they already receiving help from Kasidy Yates?). In any case at some point the Defiant leaves the Badlands and the events of Caretaker take place anyway

a random wormhole/space irregularity/whatever brings Voyager to the Gamma Quadrant and they immediately almost end up destroyed by the Dominion (which they only vaguely know about), has to hide in a nebula/land on a planet but ta-dahh! it's the Defiant who responds to the distress signal! Except they also almost get destroyed, and the two crews have to help one another to get back on their feet. The specifics depend on when this happens of course—if it's before "Message in a Bottle" the crew would have to learn about the war from the DS9 people and I can't imagine that going over well, especially with the former Maquis. In any case I can see a lot of tension between crews (in a "we were trying to get home and now you are in a war that killed our friends!" vs "you guys disappeared without a trace so you don't have a right to tell us that we made mistakes"). The kicker is that this would be a good opportunity for Voyager to finally get to the AQ but they realize there's no way they could sneak Voyager past Dominion forces towards the Bajoran wormhole, and they can't duplicate the cloak for such a big ship, so in the end the Defiant can only help Voyager go back to DQ (honestly heartwrenching just thinking about this lol)

This is not exactly a crossover, but: DS9 is a hub of research for wormholes for obvious reasons so what if we shelve the whole thing with Barclay and have Voyager contact the station instead? there could just be fun occasional interactions between the officers from the two shows I think.

Now what interactions would I like to see the most? Sisko and Janeway as I've said, Chakotay and B'Elanna reacting to pretty much all the DS9 Starfleet officers on one hand and to Kira and Odo on the other. I really, really would like to see Benjamin's reaction to Seven of Nine too, although I'm afraid it would be rather painful for him still. But I think he'd also be interested in hearing about a former drone that managed to escape. On a lighter note I would love to see Jadzia grinning her way into challenging Tom at a game of dares (and winning every one). Tuvok and Worf would HATE the madness of having two crews of strong personalities interact so much, and I kinda want to see them both and Julian work together on something. Perhaps Harry and Miles (and B'Elanna too, unless she is refusing to speak with the people from DS9) can have a nice chat about how hard it is to keep a ship/station running in such difficult conditions. If you want to hear people yelling I think you should probably pair Kira and Seven because they would NOT get along at all imho. There is just. SO much stuff that can be said and I haven't even touched upon!! A crossover like this is such an ambitious concept and I'm sure I forgot half the stuff that I wanted to say

[crystalelemental]

STALL. IS. BACK!

Vs. Bruno Looking over the list, I couldn't divine who was the most sensible opponent to take out first. No one had a specific counterplay issue to stall, as far as I could tell, so I took out Bruno first. Lodge Dawn boosts both defenses, Koga can Toxic, and Lillie can trap/debuff/Synchro Healing. What I should have done was given Dawn first sync with Evasive Rush, to dodge those Iron Tails. I did not do that though, so she dropped, leading to almost a loss as the sides had Sure Crit. I also did not give Lillie and Koga Vigilance, which...that's on me. This came closer than I'd like, but only because Koga refused to dodge. This was also the only time we came close to a loss.

Vs. Lorelei So it turns out Lorelei had Gradual Healing and I probably should've used Dawn team here, because also Golbat is weak to Ice. Hey man. It could happen to anyone. Still, Leaf is absurd, packing double Potion MPR (which she did not proc at all), Recuperation 1 on sync, and increasing bulk and speed. Viola's debuffs were, I thought, all we'd need, since I was pretty sure Lorelei was mostly special. She is, but physical moves exist. This was honestly a much safer clear than it should have been, given Gradual Healing and Ice-weak Golbat. But the fact offenses aren't boosted at all means Leaf was perfectly safe, even without Potions. But I opted for this team here so Golbat would guarantee Toxic, thanks to the boosted secondary effect rate.

Vs. Lance BP Morty kinda ridiculous on Stall. You can't access First Aid in addition to Potion MPR, Synchro Healing, and Trainer Move MPR, but he did just fine. The real comedy is when the sides start hitting themselves in confusion at the end of a match. BP Erika remains fantastic for stall format, and Tech Nidoqueen debuffs offenses. The real kicker is that Morty's natural passive is Master Healer. Which means Synchro Healing gains that boost. He recovers more of sync than anyone else in the game, as far as I can tell. So that's pretty great.

Vs. Agatha Clemont's team is a little slow, so I gave them boosted gauge. Clemont was set up against Agatha, because she has Sludge Bomb, and therefore a reasonable chance to Poison, tanking a run. Clemont has Antitoxin available for his Stall grid, without losing MPR, First Aid, or Synchro Healing. My boy. Lucy's a guarantee on both effects, Janine is a debuff but also some evade tanking in a pinch.

Vs. Blue This wasn't strictly on purpose, but the other teams handled everything so well I let it go. My SS Leaf is 5/5, so offense debuffing occurred despite not needing it to. Potion MPR and Jasmine's Recuperation 2 is sufficient. Wallace supplies trap, and then kinda just looks pretty while the passive damage does its stuff. SS Leaf also has her trainer move, which can speed up access to sync later in the fight, when Jasmine needs to be more on top of her sync healing.

Initial Impressions I feel like this is the easiest Stall has ever been. Synchro Healing is a fantastic skill, and having two defense boosting BP units with it is hilarious. One's got Potion, the other has Endure and First Aid. They're basically immune to death. Lodge Lillie also adds a ton, with her offense debuffing, Trap, and Synchro Healing making her a fantastic pick for the format. Leaf remains unchallenged in her role as Stall Queen, having her base form with tremendous recurring healing, and her Sygna Suit offering fantastic Toxic, debuffing, and healing support in one.

Jasmine/Wallace alongside SS Leaf does cause some problems with gauge, but the pop healing is generally sufficient to offset it. Lodge Dawn also has some issues with physical bulk, and I forgot to test Evasive Rush, but evasion is generally inconsistent as it is, so I'm not putting a ton of faith in it. Still, this went really well. All of these were first try, and the only ones who came close to death were Dawn's team, which...even one good dodge would've swung the match so all three survived. Consistent dodging is questionable, but one dodge? That's possible. So I'd say all of these check out pretty well. I'm happy with it. Stall is back in business.

[hertzwritings]

Jealous

A/N: Oh, boy, this is a smutty one! So the amazing @fanartandfanfiction requested this story and OH MAN AM I DOWN FOR IT.

Request: First thing age gap they’ve been on movies with each other before done a sex scene all that fun stuff but… when she confesses her feelings for him after sex. He says something along the lines of you need “you need to live your life a little more before i tell you i feel the same way”. But the kicker is she then goes to a movie premiere with Chris Evans, and he figures out that he gets very jealous when he does in fact see her living her life without him.

I did tweak it slightly, but no worries! This is probably going to have to be a two-parter though – but two very smutty parts…

I’m so so so so so so so so so down for this, and I gotta thank her, that amazing woman, for getting me out of a writer’s block!

Remember, feedback feeds the soul and requests are always open!

Also: This is going to touch upon a fictional movie, that the reader and Henry is shooting, just so nobody thinks I’ve got an inside on his upcoming movies 😉

MASTERLIST

HENRY CAVILL MASTERLIST

ASK ME ANYTHING/REQUESTS

Pairing: Henry Cavill x reader (and a dash of Chris Evans)

Warnings: Language, smut (minors DNI, please), Dom!Henry, Jealous!Henry, Possessive!Henry, age-gap (reader is 22, Henry is 38), daddy-kink, breeding-kink, cream-pie, degradation-kink, praise-kink, breath play, p in v, fingering, oral (M receiving), spanking, pet-names, unprotected sex and probably something else I forgot about

Wordcount: 3.935

Part 2

Jealous

You’d spent the last three weeks pretty much glued to Henry Cavill and his large thighs. As in glued.

You didn’t really mind, but it was getting increasingly hard to focus on your actual job every time he rutted against you – unintentionally, of course – and straight up knocked the wind out of you.

It was because of the damn motorcycle-scene, that you were currently stuck in this position; facing Henry on a large leather seat, your legs thrown over his large thighs as he straddled the bike, your core overwhelmingly close to his groin and completely encased by his wide arms. The scene seemed to drag on forever, constantly needing new angles, pick-ups or just straight do-overs. You were burning up, and with the thought of the goddamn sex-scene that followed this one on the call-sheet, made you almost want to quit on the spot.

“You good, Y/N?” He mumbled; his lips curled in a teasing smile. Oh, yes, perfectly fine, except the whole ass man that you sat on.

“Yup. Just hot.” You answered tightly. You weren’t lying; the sun was beating down on the two of you and you had seen the sweat pebble on his forehead.

“It’s quite warm today, isn’t it?” Oh god, you were talking about the fucking weather with him. You nodded.

“Alright, Y/N, I’m going to need you to scoot closer to him. I want you to be chest to chest, and you need to be pretty steady, because we’re giving you two guns instead of one, I think it’ll work better.” The director said, pointing to the two of you. You sighed.

“So… You want me to be literally on top of him?” He nodded.

“Yes, and even though the bike isn’t moving, we’re still going to have it rumble a little, so you need to be sure you’re safely and steady on it.” You looked at Henry.

“Okay?” You asked. He smiled.

“Be my guest.” Great. You scooted forwards, slowing inching up on him, until you were straddling him, your chest pressed against his and his very prominent bulge right under your throbbing core. Fucking hell.

“You need to squeeze your thighs around me, Y/N, or you’ll fall off.” He whispered in your ear. You bit back a moan as he rocked gently under you, adjusting slightly.

“Yup, sure, got it.” You answered and squeezed around him. You were going to die.

“Alright, Y/N and Henry, we’re starting the scene in a minute, get comfortable and Y/n, you’re getting your guns…” A PA came over with the two guns. You held your arms out, holding them under Henry’s, pointing the guns to the “invisible” enemy, ready to do some trick shoots. Thank God, you weren’t actually moving on the bike, because you would definitely fall off. Instead, it rested on a large trailer, hooked to a car, that would move you.

“Alright, ready to go!” You nodded once, trying to keep your wits around yourself as Henry’s cologne filled your nose.

“And… Action!” You felt the rumble under you and you couldn’t help the small moan that escaped your lips, as the vibrations shot straight to your core – you heard Henry groan and he shifted under you, a suspicious twitch hitting you. You bit your lip and at the cue, started shooting.

“You’re a tease, Y/N…” Henry whispered and shifted again. This time there was no mistaking it, he intentionally rolled his hips, so his clothed length hit you. You bit your lip and tried to focus. “Shit, you’re going to be the death of me.” He groaned.

Before you knew it, the scene had ended and you gratefully got to your feet, shaking slightly and very wet from his constant flow of praises and his twitching length that pushed against you.

“Alright, we’re moving to the bedroom-scene, act two!” The director wrangled everybody together and pointed at you and Henry.

“You two, get to makeup and costumes, we’ve got thirty!” He yelled and you both nodded, falling in step with each other as you walked to the trailers. He kept adjusting his pants, and you couldn’t help yourself.

“Got an issue, Cavill?” You asked teasingly. He narrowed his eyes at you.

“Oh, you need to be careful, Y/N…” He said, moving a little closer before you stopped in front of the makeup-trailer. “Or I might have to have you take care of it, since you caused it.” You felt your cheeks heat up in an instant, and your breath hitched.

“Oh, really?” He quirked and eyebrow and bent his head down, so his face was level with yours.

“You seem to be a bad girl, darling. Watch yourself.” You swallowed a moan. “See you on set.” He whispered, his lips so damn close, you could almost taste them, and then he turned on his heel and stalked to the costume-trailer, leaving you very frustrated and very red.

----------------

40 minutes later, you were pinned under him, barely dressed, your legs wrapped around his waist and your pussy flush to his length.

“Okay, ready?” You both nodded at your director, eyes firmly on each other’s, trying to size one another up to see, who would back down first.

“Okay, remember, just do what feels natural to you guys. If it doesn’t work, we’ll choreograph something, okay?”

“You got it.” You said with a grin.

“Alright, action!”

Henry didn’t waste any time, his lips firmly on yours, tongue sliding against your bottom lip. He was intoxicating, the taste of him like fucking cocaine to you; you groaned and let him in as he rutted against you, pressing his already hard length against you. You wrapped your arms around his neck, dragging your nails against the skin and you heard him moan at the feeling – you both moved, almost dry-humping as you kissed, letting any and all emotions out into it. You could barely focus on anything but his length, and you moved your hand from his neck and slid it between your bodies. He stopped kissing you for a fraction of a second, as his eyes found yours, panting, to see if you were going to do, what he thought you were.

You smirked, a smile hidden from the cameras, and grabbed his length under the covers.

He growled, fucking growled at the feeling of your hand around him, even through clothes, and pistoned his hips, jerking you both a little. His one hand went to your cheek, his fingers wrapping around your chin and cheek to hold you in place, his face falling next to your ear.

“You’re in fucking trouble.” A strained whisper came, his lips hitting your ear. You moaned, not really caring about the cameras anymore, and rolled your hips under him.

“Cut!” You both stopped, panting, your hand slowly inching off of him. “That was amazing, guys!” The director seemed overjoyed at you both. “I’m really impressed, you really sold the chemistry.”

“Thanks, Craig.” You said in a husky voice, lust lacing your words. Henry cleared his throat.

“Yeah, thanks.”

“Okay, well… We’ll go over the dailies tomorrow morning, but you guys are off for the rest of the night!” He said happily.

“Cool, thank you.” Henry cleared his throat again.

“Can we have a moment to ourselves?” He asked the team, who all nodded, albeit confusedly, and left. He got up, not bothering to hide his large erection and grabbed his robe, looking at you with a wicked smile on his lips.

“Meet me at my room in an hour.” You looked at him with pursed lips.

“What’s in it for me?” You asked teasingly. He stalked to you, grabbed you by the throat and you mewled at the touch; Goddamnit this man could murder you and you’d thank him.

“You’ll just have to wait and see, you impatient girl.”

Exactly an hour later, you knocked on his hotel-room, your heart beating out of your chest. You had a good idea about where this was leading, but you didn’t dare have any expectations to it – he might as well just give you a solid talking to for being a little too handsy.

He opened the door, smiling at you and gestured for you to step inside. When you were inside, you turned to him expectantly.

“So, what did you want?” You asked huskily. He walked to you, standing so close you could feel the rise and fall of his chest.

“What do you think, Y/N?” He asked, his voice low and dangerous. You shrugged, trying to keep your composure.

“I don’t know, eat dinner?”

“Oh, darling, there’s something I want you to eat, alright.” He moved impossibly closer, his face mere inches from yours.

“Oh?” Your voice was small, pussy throbbing at the endless ideas flooding your brain and his fucking cologne. It was like a drug.

His hand went to your cheek, stroking it gently with his thumb, before he found your eyes.

“Do you want me, Y/N?” Your breath hitched and his hand moved down slightly, his pinky now resting on your pulse-point.

“Why?” You asked.

“Because I want you.” He stated matter-of-factly, his voice honeyed. “I want to fucking violate you.” He growled, another finger falling on your pulse-point on your throat. You gulped, heat shooting straight to your pussy.

“Yeah?” He nodded, his lips almost touching yours. “Show me.”

He groaned, his lips crashing against yours hard and full of desperation, his full hand now on your throat, as he pushed you back against the door separating the living-area from the bedroom, slowly moving you backwards towards the bed as his lips danced over yours.

His hand squeezed lightly around your throat and that slight pressure was enough for you to gasp – you had never been so ready to submit to someone as you were in this very moment. He groaned and let his tongue slide against yours, his free hand finding the back of your dress and the zipper, tugging it harshly until your dress fell from your shoulders.

He detangled himself from your lips and moved the dress fully off of you, breathing heavily as he saw your form; you had decided to forgo underwear, which made his eyes darken and his fingers twitch around your throat.

“Fuck, you’re a little slut, aren’t you?” He whispered, his eyes narrowed and a dangerous smile on his lips.

“Yes, sir…” You moaned as he let a finger slide through your folds. He chuckled darkly and pushed you to your knees.

“Not sir.”

“No?” You asked, breathing heavy. He shook his head.

“I think for tonight… You can call me daddy.” He whispered, clearly testing if you were okay with it. You simply moaned in response, feeling your slick on your thighs.

“Open my pants, baby.” He commanded. Who were you to argue? You slowly opened them, inching them down his massive thighs. “God, you are submissive, darling.” You moaned as his hand fell into your hair, wrangling his fingers in it and tugged it.

“Take me in your mouth.” Your breath hitched as your fingers wrapped around the waistband of his boxers and pulled them down, letting his massive cock spring free.

“I don’t think…” You started, but he simply chuckled.

“You’ll take me.”

“Yes… Daddy.” You asked softly. He growled and the smirk on his lips widened, his cock twitching in front of you.

“Good girl.” You slowly wrapped your hand, that looked impossibly small now, around his cock, slowly pumping him. He groaned and his hips jerked, the head of him closer to your lips now – you licked your lips and looked up at him through your eyelashes.

“Can I, daddy?” You asked with big eyes.

“Yes.” You wrapped your lips around the head of him, trying to tease and take it slow, put he pulled your hair harshly, holding you firmly in his grip. You whined at the pain.

“No fucking teasing, you’ve done that enough for today. Take all of me.” He pushed against your lips, forcing his cock between your lips and you gladly opened, taking him as far down as you could. When he hit the back of your throat, you gagged slightly, already feeling how sore your jaw was going to be tomorrow.

“Oh, sweetheart, you can do more than that.” You looked at him, tears welling in your eyes and spit dribbling from your chin; you moaned as he pushed further, sinking deeper in your throat.

“Tap my thigh twice if you need to stop.” He said softly, and you nodded, your lips twitching around him. He groaned as he pulled back slightly right before slamming back into you. You gagged loudly as he started fucking your mouth, his hand in your hair, holding you in place, your hands on his thighs to steady yourself.

The sounds of him grunting, the wetness from your mouth and the feeling of his cock in your throat made you whine around him, your starving pussy clenching around noting. He growled, hips stuttering, before he picked up the pace and pushed even further, burrowing himself in you.

“Fuck, you’re…” He groaned and stopped, cock twitching in your throat, before he pulled out, leaving you a panting, dripping mess.

“Bed. Now.” He grumbled, forcing you to your feet by a tug of your hair and you followed willingly. He pushed you down on your stomach, your bare ass sticking out to him and he hummed at the sight of the glistening slick on your thighs.

“All this for me, Y/N?” he murmured, fingers coating in your slick. “

Yes, daddy…” You breathed.

“Hmm…” For a moment, you felt nothing as he stood over you. “I think you need a little punishment for what you did earlier, don’t you, baby?” he asked in a husky voice laced with lust. “Being so dirty in front of all those people…” His hand slid over your bare cheek, feather light in touch, before he drew it back.

“Count them.”

“What…” You were interrupted in what exactly you had to count, because his hand fell harshly on your ass, the echoing ring of the slap vibrating in your very core. You mewled and moaned.

“Count.” He ordered in a hard voice, his hand drawing back again.

“O-one…” His hand fell back, hitting the same spot again, your ass already burning under his hard hand. “Two, fuck!” You moaned. His hand hit down one, two, three, five, ten more times before he stilled, his hand gently rubbing the burning skin.

“Good girl. Spread your legs for daddy.” He whispered – you did, spreading your shaking legs, and felt just how wet you’d become during his spanking. It was almost embarrassing if you weren’t so fucking horny for him.

“Oh, darling, all for me?” He said huskily. You moaned your agreement before screaming, when his hand hit your bare lips, the smack wet and hard.

“You want me?” He asked, leaning over you, his cock twitching perfectly against your wet folds.

“Yes, please, daddy, please…” You moaned and pushed back a little, hoping to catch him between your wet folds.

He tutted and pulled back slightly, his fingers sliding down your back, between your cheeks until they landed on your dripping hole.

“Ask again, nicely.” He said, the tip of his thick fingers pressing against your hole. You panted.

“Please, I’m begging you…” You whispered, desperate to feel anything in you at this point. He chuckled and pushed a long digit inside of you, curling his finger, before he started pumping.

“Fuck, you barely need me to warm you up, you dirty whore.” He mumbled as the sounds of him finger fucking your wet pussy filled the room. You moaned wantonly and pushed back against him.

“More, I need more, daddy…” you pleaded, desperate for both more and faster. He chuckled.

“When you ask so nicely…” He packed another finger in you, picking up the speed and fucked you, your walls clenching around him.

“You’re not to cum before asking, got it?” His voice was commanding.

“Yes, daddy!” You almost screamed, feeling your orgasm building already – you weren’t far off, and he must’ve sensed it as well, because he picked up his speed and added another finger, filling you completely. He assaulted your senses and your dripping pussy, and you felt the coil in your abdomen ignite completely; you were so fucking close, your legs shaking under you, as he fucked you hard with his fingers.

“Please, can I cum, please, daddy…” You mewled, eyes rolling back.

“Cum for me, you fucking whore.” His free hand slid over your throat, squeezing the air out from you as you came around his fingers, the orgasm rolling over you in waves. You felt and heard the gush of your orgasm on his fingers, and he moaned feeling your wetness on him.

“Shit, Y/N.” He pulled out quickly and lined his cock against your dripping folds.

“Tell me to stop.” He asked urgently, checking one last time to see if you were truly okay with this.

“If you don’t fuck me right now, I’m going to…” He didn’t wait for you to finish, pushing his full length inside of you, his hand around your throat, making your back arch and breath stop – he stretched you to your limits, filling you like nobody had before and you would forever be ruined by him. He bottomed out, the tip of him hitting your cervix in a deliciously painful way, and you rolled your hips experimentally against him.

He growled and pulled back before slamming into you again, dragging against your walls, his speed wild and needy. You moaned as he brutally fucked you from behind, hand around your throat; you were seeing spots and your pussy clenched around him, trying to draw him deeper inside

“P-please, daddy…” Your voice was broken by the lack of air and he let your throat go at the same time as he slammed into you deeply, his balls hitting your overly sensitive clit. You almost roared as you came around him, him panting behind you.

“Fuck, what. Did. I. Tell. You.” He jammed his hips against your ass, burrowing inside of you as deeply as he could, his hand falling harder than ever on your exposed ass.

“Fuck, I’m sorry, daddy, sorry!” You mewled, trying to hold onto the sheets fruitlessly. He roared and spanked you again, the heat of it sending sparks through your nerves, before he leaned over you, his chest against your back.

“I’m going to fucking fill you up, Y/N.” You heaved a breath at his words. “I want to fill you and make you swell with me, you got that?” You nodded, too lost in the pleasure to tell him you were on the pill, and he pushed you against the mattress, pounding you deeply.

His hips stuttered slightly, and you moaned at the feeling of his cock swelling slightly in you, stretching you even more than you thought possible.

“You want me to fill you, baby?” He grumbled huskily and you nodded desperately. He spanked your ass again.

“Fucking words.”

“Yes! Yes, daddy, please fill me, I want to feel you cum in me, please…” You moaned wantonly, pushing back against his deep strokes and he groaned, picking up speed with faltering movements. He was close.

You felt yourself clench again, the coil in you ready to snap, and you wailed out, desperate for release.

“Please, can I cum with you, please?” You pleaded, trying your best to hold off. Your nerves were on fire, collecting in the slick heat in your stretched out pussy.

“Yes, baby.” He mumbled, his lips on your shoulder and his teeth dragging against your skin. You screamed your release as it washed over you, drenching your legs, and white-hot fire exploded under your skin.

He roared with you, his teeth burying in the soft skin of your shoulder as he stilled, cock twitching and you felt the ropes of hot cum fill you; you moaned at the warmth and fell down, your body limp under him.

He pulled out and hummed appreciatively at the cum leaking out of you, before he laid down next to you, his eyes searching yours.

As you both came down, you sighed happily, and his lips found yours in a soft kiss.

“You know this can’t happen again, right?” he asked gently. “We’re coworkers and I’m almost twenty years older than you.” You huffed and sat up, grabbing your dress from the floor.

“Oh, you just thought of that after fucking me?”

“I’m sorry, it was a lack of judgement. You should go live your life. Find someone who treats you right, you know?” You huffed and put your dress on, standing up.

“Sure thing, Daddy.”

-------------------

Six months later, you would finally be free from him. All you had left was the goddamn premiere, but you could survive it – Henry had acted like a gentleman all filming after your little adventure, but he had not breathed a word in your direction since. The mood was tense, but the director clearly liked it, and you were left to stew on your own.

Thankfully an earlier coworker had been happy to escort you to the premiere, his hand softly on the small of your back, as you posed for pictures.

“It’s been a while since I’ve seen the old man.” Chris whispered in your ear, holding you closely. “I’m guessing he has a thing for you?” He asked you with a grin. You smiled at the cameras and looked to Chris, who looked towards the other end of the red carpet.

“What the hell are you on about, Evans?” You asked with a grin, following his eyes.

Henry was glaring daggers at you both, hands fisted along his side, and you couldn’t help but feel a stir of happiness inside; at least he was finally fucking reacting to you.

“Oh, well, we had a little thing.” You whispered, making sure nobody but Chris could hear you. “But he has no right to act like that, he was the one who broke it off.” You shrugged and, for good measure, wrapped your arm around Chris as well, feeling a slight heat blossom in you at the feeling of his body against yours.

“Well, wanna give him something to really seethe over?” He asked with a wicked grin. You looked at him with narrowed eyes and could almost read his intentions in his eyes.

“Oh, yeah.” He leaned down and planted a soft kiss on your lips; you sighed into it, your lips moving flawlessly against his, and you felt a familiar pang of lust and heat gather in your core. He pulled away as the clicks from the cameras grew to insane amounts and waved once at the cameras before moving to the inside of the theater, where Henry stood next to the door leading to the cinema, glaring at you.

He forced a smile on his face.

“Evans, it’s been a while.” Henry said tightly before nodding once at you. “Y/N.”

“Henry.” You nodded back and wrapped your arm tighter around Chris. “Hey, I’ll be right back, I just need to use the ladies room.”

“No worries, we’ve got a lot to talk about, right, man?” Chris winked at Henry and you frowned, feeling a little uneasy at the seemingly familiar report they had.

As you turned the corner from the bathroom, you spotted the two men laughing and their eyes darted to you. Chris leaned in and whispered something to Henry and even from a distance, you could see Henry’s eyes darken at whatever Chris had said.

Oh God, what had you gotten yourself involved in?

Part 2

TAGLIST:

@acaceta @a-skov @angelmather1 @cooldreamlandsandwich @est1887 @enchantedbytomandhenry @fionnthebandersnacc @herroyalbubbliness @keiva1000 @kebabgirl67 @luclittlepond @one-sweet-gubler @pandaxnienke @perfunctory-username69 @sleutherclaw @summersong69 @spookyboogyuniverse @stardusted26 @thereisa8ella @timetraveller4 @thatonechickhere @themanfromu

@thelastpyle @yourlocalhoney @wheretheriversrunintothesea

[cherienymphe]

Crossfire IV (Bucky x Reader x Steve)

Warnings: domestic violence, implied NON-CON, biker!Bucky

PLEASE DNI IF ANY OF THIS OFFENDS YOU

➥ divider by @firefly-graphics​

summary: You and your new husband Steve move back to his hometown. It is here that his past catches up with him, and you both pay the price.

~

You were awake when Steve left for work the next morning. He’d tried to coax you into sex, but you had feigned fatigue, telling him that you were still exhausted and sore from the previous night. You weren’t sure if he believed you, you had a feeling that he didn’t, but you didn’t care. He left you with a lingering kiss, blue eyes murky with a myriad of emotions you didn’t care to place.

You had laid in bed for an hour, just staring at the ceiling as you attempted to sort your thoughts and your feelings. Your husband, a man who was once your best friend but now a stranger to you, had been involved in a life of crime during his younger days that consisted of things that made your stomach turn. He’d hurt people, stolen from people, and probably much worse. Now, you were back in his hometown, reaping the consequences of his actions. Actions that he had failed to disclose with you.

After you finally got up, you just wandered aimlessly around the house. Here and there, you unpacked more stuff little by little, but after a while, you found yourself wondering if there was even a point. Surely, you couldn’t stay here. Right? That was something that should’ve been discussed in more detail last night but…

You released a sigh as you stepped outside, taking a few empty boxes to the trash.

You were so angry last night, and Steve… Thinking of what happened between you two left a sour taste in your mouth. You hadn’t even wanted to sleep with him, that’s how angry you were, and it seemed like Steve hadn’t cared. You shook your head, telling yourself that it was complicated. You both were dealing with an onslaught of emotions. You had just turned to head back inside when you heard the roar of a motorcycle. 

Several motorcycles.

Your eyes widened and you turned back around just in time to watch 4 bikers pull into your yard, 3 of which you recognized. The 4th was a man you’d never seen before, his broad and bulky frame making you swallow, dirty blonde strands pulled back away from his face into a bun. They all parked, Sam, Clint and the mystery man remaining behind while Bucky approached you.

Without sparing him a second glance, you hurried back to your house. You could hear him calling your name, but you ignored him, determined to get away from him and inside as soon as possible. You may have been drunk, but you remembered the feel of his hands and lips on you clearly. Those same hands roughly grabbed you just as you took the first step onto the porch. 

A yelp escaped you as he pulled you to him, roughly helping you up the steps. You could feel his heartbeat against your arm, his breath disrupting your hair. Despite your efforts to fight him off, he jerked you around easily until you were facing him. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed that the 3 other men were just sitting there on their bikes, watching the whole ordeal. You had a feeling they didn’t stop by to say hello.

“You talk to Steve?” he wondered, head tilted to the side.

You didn’t answer him, looking away, and he chuckled, a smirk in his voice as he spoke.

“Why do I get the feeling that your conversation didn’t go as planned?”

Again, you said nothing, and he hummed, forcing you to look at him.

“Maybe there wasn’t much talking involved, at all,” he mused. “Steve was always good at hiding his temper…”

Your eyes widened a bit, and his smirk grew.

“...until he couldn’t anymore.”

You snatched yourself out of the dark-haired man’s grip, wrapping your arms around yourself as you glanced at the other men in the yard. You released a breath that you didn’t realize you were holding and took a step back.

“Look… I’m sorry for what Steve did. It wasn’t right, and I wish that I had known before I came here…”

Bucky simply studied you, blue eyes narrowed a tad.

“...but this is between you and Steve. This should be handled between the two of you, and I’m sick of being involved with it.”

He raised his brows at your firm tone, and you tried not to let on how scared you really were. Truthfully, you were frustrated more than anything else. You were frustrated with the man before you for taking out his anger at Steve on you, and you were frustrated with Steve for keeping you in the dark about all of this.

“If I could take back what Steve did, I would. If I had that money to give you, I would for the sole hope of you leaving us alone, but I can’t. You’re angry, understandably, but discuss it over with the appropriate party. Stop cornering me, stop coming by our house unannounced when you know he isn’t here, stop touching me- just stop! This has nothing to do with me-!”

“What if it did?” he interrupted, taking a step towards you.

You frowned at him, forcing yourself to stand your ground, resisting the urge to squirm as he ran his cold eyes over you. 

“Even if Steve did have that money, he wouldn’t give it back,” he said, confirming your own suspicions about all of this. “I’m not expecting it back, but…”

He stopped a hair’s width away from you, looking down his nose at you. For a moment, you forgot about the other 3 parties watching you two, and you stumbled back, prepared to run into the house when Bucky grabbed you. His hands were painful on your arms, and you winced, attempting to push him away.

“What if this did involve you?”

“Let go of me,” you whispered, but he continued as if he hadn’t heard you.

“What if you could do something to make all of this go away?”

You froze, frown deepening as you fought to understand what he meant. You didn’t like the way he was looking at you. You never liked the way he looked at you, but there was something especially heinous about the way he was looking at you now. He leaned in, his nose brushing against your own, and you leaned back as much as you possibly could.

“God knows I would love to punch that punk until he swallowed all of his teeth for what he did. I’d kill to take everything away from him so he could feel a fraction of what I did when he betrayed us…”

His voice was low, thick with something you were too scared to name. He jerked you closer, and you stumbled into him, your chest pressed against his as he hummed.

“...but why do all of that...when I could just take you?”

Your heart dropped to your stomach, and nausea washed over you like a wave. His blue eyes sparkled as he grinned, looking even more intimidating as his teeth winked at you.

“I think that would upset him very much. I think that’d drive him absolutely insane, wouldn’t it?”

You were fighting against him now, but he wasn’t letting up, and tears sprang to your eyes as he continued to torment you with his words.

“...to know that you’re mine now, and that you came willingly. That would be the real kicker-.”

“Let go of me,” you spat.

“It would eat him up inside, knowing that you’re with me, taking my cock every night-.”

“Stop!”

“That I have you wrapped around me, filling you up as much as I want, and all to protect him-.”

He cut himself off with a chuckle as you finally got out of his hold, stumbling towards the door. Your chest was heaving with anger and disgust and panic all rolled into one. You struggled to open the door, and he laughed at you some more.

“Let me know what you think, doll. You’ve got 3 days.”

You slammed the door in his face, back pressed to it as you slid to the floor. Your vision was blurry from your tears, and you drew your knees up to your chest, letting your head fall as the roar of motorcycles reached your ears.

Your back was pressed to the counter, arms folded over your chest, eyes on the simmering food when Steve walked through the door. He was quiet, and you would have found it odd but you were quiet too. You bit your lip, moving to turn the pots off when he entered the kitchen.

“Dinner’s ready,” you quietly told him, and he simply hummed.

You finally turned to look at him, surprised to find a frown on his face. You chose not to dwell on it and instead cleared your throat, shifting on your feet.

“Steve, we need to talk.”

He exhaled through his nose, and you watched as he rolled the sleeves of his button down up, resting his hands on his hips.

“Yeah...we do.”

You didn’t like his tone, heart stuttering as you stood on the end of his heated gaze.

“Why don’t you go first...”

His words were gentle, but the edge in his voice betrayed him. Shaking it off, you spoke.

“I think we should leave.”

He blinked, and it seemed that he hadn’t been expecting that, and you continued.

“It isn’t safe here, and I want to start a family somewhere safe. Let’s leave,” you breathed, walking towards him and taking his hand.

He stared at you with pursed lips and hard eyes, and you squeezed his hand.

“Let’s go,” you pleaded. “Only half of our stuff is unpacked anyway. Let’s just pack up the rest and get out of here.”

Steve stared at you for a long time, not saying anything, and you wondered what he was thinking. For the first time in a long time, you couldn’t really get a read on him, and that made you frown. He took a deep breath, heaving a heavy sigh as he tilted his head at you.

“This wouldn’t have anything to do with Bucky’s visit today...would it?”

His words made you freeze, and you blinked at him, brows drawing together at his words. You opened and closed your mouth, at a loss for words before you finally cleared your throat.

“...what?”

“You heard me,” Steve said, stepping towards you.

You took a step back, shaking your head. 

“I-.”

“Why was he here, Y/N? Why didn’t you call me the minute you could? Why didn’t you tell me?”

You were taken aback by his tone, and you shook your head.

“I didn’t… It doesn’t matter-.”

“It does to me,” he interrupted, taking another step towards you, forcing you back. “Why does he keep showing up here? Showing up wherever you are?”

You didn’t like the accusations in his voice, and you felt irritation rising.

“You know why! You did this, Steve…”

He scoffed. 

“You did! You’re the reason he keeps showing up and I… I just- I just want to leave. Let’s just go! Please,” you begged, trying to pull him out of the kitchen, but he wouldn’t nudge.

“What did he say to you?”

“How did you even know?”

This wasn’t the first time he’d caught you off guard with knowing something before you even got to tell him.

“Does that matter? Why was he here? What did he say?”

“Who cares?” you screamed.

“Clearly you do since it’s scaring you enough to run,” he argued. 

“Yes, I’m scared!”

You huffed at him, not understanding how he wasn’t getting it.

“I can’t go anywhere without him showing up and threatening me. You dragged me into this with no warning, no hint, no nothing! I’m terrified, Steve,” you cried. “I don’t feel safe here, and I feel like you don’t care.”

“Of course, I care,” he sighed, pulling you into his arms. “I just… I came back here to settle down. This is my home, and I won’t be bullied out of it.”

You shook your head, pulling away from him.

“Steve...I have 3 days. He wants...he wants me,” you softly whispered, almost afraid to say it.

Steve’s hold tightened on your arms, and your eyes focused on the floor.

“He’s threatening to hurt you or worse unless I…”

“Unless you what? Give yourself to him?”

His hold tightened to a painful degree, and you hissed, trying to pull away. You looked at him again and found Steve the angriest you’d ever seen him.

“This is why we should just leave-.”

“This is why I should make it clear once and for all that he isn’t welcome here, around you,” he gritted out, moving away from you. 

You watched as he neared the coffee table, where his keys were, and you nearly growled in frustration. 

“Steve, stop,” you said, grabbing onto his arm.

“Why?” he wondered, whirling on you. “Why are you trying to protect him?”

“I’m not,” you snapped, offended at his implications. “I’m trying to protect you. Us! Just leave it alone, leave him alone, and let’s go! Please, Steve-.”

You swallowed your words when he grabbed you again, forcing you back as he pressed his chest to yours.

“Would you have done it? If you hadn’t told me, in 3 days, would you have gone to him?”

His question threw you, and you hesitated. Would you? To protect Steve, you’d do just about anything, but would you go to Bucky?

“You would,” he decided for you, and you shook your head. “He keeps sniffing around here, and I’m starting to think you like it.”

“Excuse me?” you gasped.

Your back harshly met the wall, and you flinched. Steve towered over you, looking much larger than usual. Your confusion had to have been all over your features, but Steve was too far gone too care.

“You have to.”

“I am literally trying to leave-.”

“No one is that stupid,” he sneered.

“Hey!”

Tears sprang to your eyes again, lips trembling as he pushed away from you, shaking his head.

“You keep putting yourself in these situations, in these compromising positions with him-.”

“Stop!”

The house was quiet as you two just stared at each other, Steve’s eyes narrowed while yours were filled with tears, chest clenching from his painful words.

“You do not get to talk to me like that,” you whispered.

Steve at least had the decency to look away in shame, but by the clenching of his jaw, it was clear that he was still angry.

“I am your wife, and you do not get to talk to me that way. You did this, Steve. We are in this situation because of you, and it doesn’t seem like you plan to do anything about it. Anything that would help anyway,” you mumbled.

He didn’t respond, and you released a shaky breath, trying to hold back more tears.

“I’m going to bed. Enjoy your dinner,” you sneered, brushing past him and making your way up the stairs.

Steve joined you only an hour or so later, and you feigned sleep despite being wide awake. You could barely stand to lay beside him, and the thought made your heart hurt. He had never looked at you like that, talked to you like that. Your husband was becoming a stranger to you, and you hated it. It made you sad, but it made you just as angry. 

Steve had let you walk into all of this blind, putting not only your life in danger, but the possible life of your future child. The two of you had discussed children often, and it seemed agreed upon that you both wanted to get started right away. Did he honestly expect you to raise a child in this? God, you could literally be pregnant, right now, and Steve didn’t seem to want to make this situation any better.

Before you knew it, it was 2 in the morning, and you were zipping up a small bag of clothes and toiletries that would last you a week. If anything, to you, it seemed like Steve was content to go back to his old lifestyle. He wanted to solve this in ways that you didn’t agree with, and if that’s what he wanted to do, then he was free to do it by himself.

It didn’t take long at all to write a brief note explaining your departure, expressing your hopes that he’d follow you, but you couldn’t stay here any longer. You didn’t feel safe in your own home and never in your life had you felt that way. You felt bad, sure, but your mental and physical health was far more important.

You bit your lip, keys clenched in your fist as you placed the letter on the coffee table. You knew Steve would be mad, but you also knew he’d understand. Right? He had to understand your fear, your concern. Right? You moved to unlock the door, hand on the knob, when a cold voice stopped you.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

You whirled around with wide eyes, taking in Steve’s broad form standing at the top of the stairs. You pressed your hand to your heart, the sight of him almost giving you a heart attack, and you swallowed when you registered just what he’d asked you. You watched him make his way down the stairs, and you sighed.

“Steve, I can’t do this,” you quietly said.

Even in the darkness, you could make out the hardness of his eyes, the way his lips pressed together, jaw ticking.

“I want you to come with me, but… I can’t wait for you to realize just how bad this situation is. I can’t stay here.”

“So you were just going to leave?”

“I left a letter,” you lamely defended, swallowing. 

He didn’t stop until he was right in front of you, and you watched the way his eyes narrowed. 

“A letter.”

He was angry.

“Steve-.”

“You were just going to leave...in the middle of the night…”

“I can’t stay here-.”

You cut yourself off with a gasp as his hands clamped down on your arms, yanking you towards him. You stumbled into him, feet tripping over one another, and you hated the way he held you.

“You’re not leaving,” he quietly spat.

“I have to-!”

Your words died on your throat as one of his hands wrapped around your throat, squeezing tight, and you struggled to speak. His other arm curled around your waist, holding you to him, and you struggled in his grip. His nose pressed against yours, lips brushing your own as he glared at you.

“You are not leaving me.”

He grabbed the bag on your shoulder, and you attempted to hold onto it while also getting out of his hold. In the struggle, your feet caught on one another, and you stumbled to the floor. You moved to push yourself to your knees, but Steve was there, fingers pressing into the sides of your throat as he pressed his hand on the back of your neck.

You winced, a pained gasp escaping you as you reached up. He forced you to your feet, holding you to him as he walked you towards the stairs.

“St-Steve…”

His other hand pressed to the front of your neck, lips at your ear.

“You are staying right here by my side.”

Your shoulders lifted at the pain that traveled through you, and you were somewhat in disbelief at what was happening.

“S-stop! Steve-!”

You hissed in pain when your foot hit a step, you put your hands out to prevent him from forcing you into the bedroom, but he shoved you inside with ease. You didn’t understand what was happening until the door clicked shut behind him, your face pressed into the bed as he pushed you onto it. 

“You were going to leave me...leave me to wake up to any empty bed, an empty house...”

His voice was a deadly calm, and it scared you more than his hands on you at the moment. Hands that were pulling at your clothes. 

“What were you hoping to accomplish? Because I would have followed you and dragged you back here without hesitation,” he sneered.

The cool night air hit you, and you shook, face wet from tears as reality began to set in. His bare chest pressed to your back, pinning you down beneath him, a hand on your head as his lips grazed over your neck.

“For better or worse, sweetheart. Those are the vows we took-.”

“Steve, please,” you tearfully begged as he pressed your face further into the sheets.

“...this is just a little snag, a little bit of the worse, but let me remind you of the better…”

~

tags:  @darkficreposter @xoxabs88xox @harryspet @readermia @opheliadawnwalker3 @nickyl316h @captainchrisstan @sebabestianstan101 @villanellevi @lokislastlove @notyourtypicalrose @coconutqueen21 @hurricanerin @hyoyeoniie @kellyn1604 @sherrybaby14 @cocoamoonmalfoy @mandiiblanche @gotnofucks @oneoftheprettynerds @doozywoozy @sapphirescrolls @threeminutesoflife @searchforanotherway @mcudarklibrary @ksjksjkv @darkficsyouneveraskedfor @buckybarnesplumwhore​ @navegandoaciegas​ @c1nnam0n-g4rl​ @mr-darcy-is-a-hobbit​ @siriusjohnpotter​ @candy3002​ @jevans2​ @beardburnsupersoldiers​ @widowsmaximoff​ @nerdygirl8203​ @literalmcuhoe​ @supernaturalwintersoldier​ @charmed-asylum​

[tinstol]

Was perusing MyDramaList and remembered this existed and how much I fucking hated it. Then I read the shows description and got even angrier because in no way is that what happens it this dumpster fire that dare calls itself a show. So I’m gonna tell you guys all about it.

First of all, the first sentence is a lie. Damon is literally a Christian, so he does believe in god etc. He’s just mad about it because his life sucks, which is understandable. He nonreligious in the same way the guy from God’s Not Dead is irreligious, which is to say, not at all.

Nextly, Angelo (the angel (what subtle naming)) doesn’t really teach him to enjoy life or be a good person because they never go anywhere or do anything or meet anyone. The entire show takes place in Damon’s uncles farm (for some reason this terminally I’ll man isn’t in a hospital*) in the middle of nowhere and they do nothing but talk about how God loves him and is listening to his prayers and that shit and also their exes. Damon doesn’t do anything except look progressively more miserable and sick each episode. He doesn’t engage in any hobbies or anything that makes it look like he’s enjoying the time he has left.

And as if this wasn’t enough, the real kicker is that even after all the talks about how God is listening to his prayers for healing and supposedly regaining the will to live, he fucking dies, alone, in a random field. And that’s not all, no no no. He dies, and then he doesn’t get to go to heaven. That’s right, he and Angelo have to go be their exes’ guardian angels because fuck you I guess.

And to top it all off, is just TERRIBLY shot. I would say it looks and sounds like it was shot on a phone, but that would be a disservice to modern phone technology. Watch any tiktok and you will find better shots and sound mixing and probably a better story.

And as a side note, when I watched the finale, the comments section was absolutely filled with people singing its praises and calling it the best Filipino bl. Which, even if you somehow liked it, is unfathomable in the face of literally every other Filipino bl ever made. This may sound like me being salty, but I really think they must have for some positive comments. They also either deleted or filtered out any comment I made that mentioned them killing off their characters.

All in all, Meet My Angel is the Christian Movie(tm) of Bl dramas. It’s Christian media that’s only enjoyable for Christians(tm), especially ones not affected by the issues at hand. It’s just self-fellatio that would never convince anyone to think differently or see anything in a new light.

If it was more like the description, I would have actually enjoyed it. I’m a SUCKER for guardian angels, even as an atheist with religious trauma. I’d say even especially because of that. Because I love the idea of someone being sent to help in your darkest moment. But no one really gets helped in this show. They just claim Damon appreciates his life more and then we watch him die alone and in pain, and not get into heaven like he was promised he would.

*almost forgot to include this in the rant, but while it’s unclear exactly how long he’s had HIV/AIDS, it couldn’t be long because he got it as an adult and is still a young man in the series. By my guess, based on the conversations they have surrounding it, it couldn’t have been more than a year since he got infected. A cursory google search shows that untreated HIV turns into AIDS in 8 to 10 years. AIDS patients who do not receive HAART die within two years. Mathematically, even if he received no medical care, he should not be dying.

Also also this drama ruined the song Collide by Howie Day for me because I can no longer hear it without thinking about this terrible show.

[spxllcxstxr]

The Seven Potters Plan Part 1 • R.L

(Gif not mine)

Request: Nope, just wanted to torture myself with this idea :)

Summary: Harry Potter needs to be relocated from his house in Surrey to the Burrow, however, because he’s not quite seventeen yet, he still has the Trace. Your father, Mad-Eye Moody, comes up with a Plan B. Here’s how it goes.

Warnings: canon character death, canon Deathly Hallows, cursing, death, grieving, mention of injury and blood, death eaters, Voldemort, just a lot of hurt/angst

Word Count: 2.6k

A.N: So the first like 1k words are taken straight from the book. Why? Because I’m a sucker for that kind of stuff. Implied that you’re Remus’ age, the two of you are married, why do I think of these things? I’m like 99% sure I made this gender neutral? But if I didn’t like let me know. I know this is angsty, but I hope you all enjoy. Love you all ❤️

EDIT: So the full fic exceeded 250 word blocks, which is shit because this is not meant to be split up. Meaning, the ending is abrupt because I had to split the whole thing. This is fucking stupid, but whatever. Please don’t forget to read Part 2 for the whole story

****

“All right, all right, we’ll have time for a cozy catch up later!” Your father roars from beside you, cutting off Harry’s conversation with Tonks.

A silence falls over the kitchen, everyone staring uneasily in his direction. You tinker with the zipper on your jacket, nervous about the next few hours.

“As Dedulus probably told you,” He continues, one eye glaring at Harry, the other rolling around in its restraint. “we had to abandon Plan A. Pius Thicknesse has gone over, which gives us a big problem. He’s made it an imprisonable offense to connect this house to the Floo Network, place a Portkey here, or Apparate in or out.” You watch his knuckles turn white, the grip on his staff tightening in anger. “All done in the name of your protection, to prevent You-Know-Who getting in at you. Absolutely pointless, seeing as your mother’s charm does that already. What he’s really done is to stop you from getting out of here safely.”

Harry’s lips tug into a frown.

“Second problem: you’re underage, which means you’ve still got the Trace on you.”

Harry glances around the room, dark eyebrows knit together in confusion. “I don’t—“

“The Trace, the Trace!” Mad-Eye continues impatiently. “The charm that detects magical activity around under-seventeens, the way the Ministry finds out about underage magic! If you, or anyone around you, casts a spell to get you out of here, Thicknesse is going to know about it, and so will the Death Eaters.”

You swallow roughly at the mere thought of being swarmed by Death Eaters unprepared.

A calloused hand grabs yours, and just by the feel you recognize it at Remus’. His hand is warm and comforting in your grasp.

“We can’t wait for the Trace to break, because the moment you turn seventeen you’ll lose all the protection your mother gave you. In short: Pius Thicknesse thinks he’s got you cornered good and proper.”

“So what are we going to do?” Harry questions, his determined tone hiding fragility behind his words.

“We’re going to use the only means of transport left to us, the only ones the Trace can’t detect, because we don’t need to cast spells to use them: brooms, thestrals, and Hagrid’s motorbike.” You father answers gruffly.

You squeeze your husband’s hand hard as you shift around. You hated this plan. It left you all open and vulnerable, and the pit in your stomach was screaming at you that something bad was going to happen. But it was, in reality, the only way to safely get Harry away from his house.

A skeptical look flashes across Harry’s face as well, though he doesn’t say anything.

“Now, your mother’s charm will only break under two conditions: when you come of age, or“—Mad-Eye makes a head gesture around the kitchen, his pockets jingling.—“you no longer call this place home. You and your aunt and uncle are going your separate ways tonight. In the full understanding that you’re never going to live together again, correct?”

He nods.

“So this time, when you leave, there’ll be no going back, and the charm will break the moment you’re outside it’s range. We’re choosing to break it early, because the alternative is waiting for You-Know-Who to come and grab you the moment you turn seventeen.”

The cool metal zipper is still between your fingers, a distraction from all of the grim looks around the room.

“The one thing we’ve got on our side is that You-Know-Who doesn’t know we’re moving you tonight.” Mad-Eye informs him. “We’ve leaked a fake trail to the Ministry: they think you’re not leaving until the thirtieth. However, this is You-Know-Who we’re dealing with, so we can’t just rely on him getting the date wrong; he’s bound to have a couple of Death Eaters patrolling the skies in this general area, just in case.”

You swallow roughly at the thought.

“So, we’ve given a dozen different houses every protection we can throw at them. They all look like they could be the place we’re going to hide you, they’ve all got some connection with the Order: my house, Kingley’s place, (Y/n) and Lupin’s, Molly’s Auntie Murial’s—you get the idea.”

“Yeah.” Harry responds, nodding once again.

“You’ll be going to Tonk’s parents.” You father goes on to explain. “Once you’re within the boundaries of the protective enchantments we’ve put on their house, you’ll be able to use a Portkey to the Burrow. Any questions?”

“Er—yes.” Harry stutters. “Maybe they won’t know which of the twelve safe houses I’m heading for at first, but won’t it be sort of obvious once”—he starts counting the heads around him—“fifteen of you fly off toward Tonk’s parents’?”

“Ah,” You scoff. “And here’s the kicker.”

Harry looks at you with a frown. Your father lightly jabs you with his staff.

“I forgot to mention the key point.” Mad-Eye scowls. “Fifteen of us won’t be flying to Tonk’s parents’s. There will be seven Harry Potters moving through the skies tonight, each of them with a companion, each pair heading for a different safe house.” He takes out his old flask from the inside pocket of his jacket.

“I hate this plan.” You mutter under your breath. Remus’ fingers trace figure eights between your knuckles.

“No!” Harry loudly protests. “No way!” His hands are balled into fists as he frantically looks at all of you surrounding him.

“I told you he’d take it like this.” Hermione lightly points out.

“If you think I’m going to let six people risk their lives—!“

“—because it’s the first time for all of us.” Ron rolls his eyes at his friend.

“This is different, pretending to be me—“

“Well, none of us really fancy it, Harry.” One of the twins jokes. “Imagine if something went wrong and we were stuck as specky, scrawny, gits forever.”

Harry doesn’t smile but the other twin lets out a snort.

“You can’t do it if I don’t cooperate, you need me to give you some hair.” Harry stubbornly tells you all.

“Well, that’s the plan scuppered.” One twin dramatically sighs. “Obviously there’s no chance at all of us getting a bit of your hair unless you cooperate.”

“Yeah, fourteen of us against one bloke who’s not allowed to use magic; we’ve got no chance!” The other teases.

“Funny.” Harry sarcastically remarks. “Very funny.”

“If it has to come to force, then it will.” Mad-Eye growls.

“Dad!” You yelp, the idea of piling on top of this kid just to get a strand of hair repulsive to you.

Your father glances at you, face softening, though only slightly. You’re probably the only one who notices. The perks of growing up with him, you guess.

“Everyone here’s overage, Potter, and they’re all prepared to take the risk.”

Taking a deep breath, you focus back on your anchor. Remus’ hand is honestly the only thing keeping you from succumbing to a total breakdown.

“Let’s have no more arguments! Time’s wearing on. I want a few of your hairs, boy, now.”

“But this is mad!” Harry laughs humorlessly. “There’s no need—“

“No need!” You dad snarls. “With You-Know-Who out there and half the Ministry on his side? Potter, if we’re lucky, he’ll have swallowed the fake bait and he’ll be planning to ambush you on the thirtieth, but he’d be mad not to have a Death Eater or two keeping an eye out, it’s what I’d do. They might not be able to get at you or this house while your mother’s charm holds, but it’s about to break and they know the rough position of this place. Our only chance is to use decoys. Even You-Know-Who can’t split himself into seven.”

You let out a sigh, watching as he quickly glances at his friends.

“So, Potter—some of your hair, if you please.”

Still, he’s hesitant.

“Now!” Your dad barks, causing Harry to jump ever so slightly.

Silently, Harry brings a hand up to the top of his head and yanks at his hair as hard as he can, effectively pulling tufts of hair out. He barely even winces.

“Good.” Mad-Eye limps over to him, his prosthetic clanging against the white tiles. He waves the flask in front of him. “Straight in here, if you please.”

He drops them in and as the potion bubbles and sizzles, Ron and Hermione take a glance over his shoulders.

“Right then, all the fake Potters line up over here, then.” Mad-Eye grunts.

Ron, Hermione, Fred, George, and Fleur casually line up in the kitchen like they aren’t participating in something that might just kill them.

You also notice someone missing.

“We’re one short.” Remus observes.

“Here.” Hagrid grunts, shoving his way through, practically dragging Mundungus by the collar of his brown and dirty robes. He’s placed next to Fleur, who promptly shifts to stand between the twins. You don’t blame her.

“I told you,” Mundungus complains. “I’d sooner be a protector.”

“Shut it.” Mad-Eye growls. “As I’ve already told you, you spineless worm, any Death Eater we run into will be aiming to capture Potter, not kill him. Dumbledore always said You-Know-Who would want to finish Potter in person. It’ll be the protectors who have got the most to worry about, the Death Eaters’ll want to kill them.”

A cold chill runs down your spine. You were to be paired with another protector, mostly because your dad wanted you to be protected as well as the Potter you were guarding. In any other situation you would’ve argued against it, that you were more than capable of handling it all on your own, but this was different. You were absolutely terrified of being on your own.

It’s quiet as Mad-Eye pours the Polyjuice Potion into separate glasses. When the six of them drink the space is filled with gags and gasps as they morph into Harry Potter.

The Harry’s being to change, but you’re too caught up in your own thoughts to pay attention to any witty remarks. Anxiety courses through your veins and your foot taps against the floor.

When all of them are done, Mad-Eye starts announcing the pairs.

“The pairs will be as follows.” He declares, one eyes trained in the parchment in front of him, the other gazing at everyone. “Mundungus will be traveling with me by broom—“

“Why am I with you?” Demands a Harry in the back.

“Because you’re the one that needs watching!” You shout, glaring at the form that now backs away.

“Arthur and Fred—“

“I’m George!” Laughs one of the Harry’s. “Can’t even tell us apart when we’re Harry!”

“Sorry, George—“

“I’m only yanking your wand, I’m Fred really—“

“Enough messing around!” Mad-Eye growls. “The other one—Fred or George or whoever you are—you’re with Remus.”

You bump shoulders with the man next to you.

“Miss Delacour—“

“I’m taking Fleur on a thestral.” Bill interjects. “She’s not that fond of brooms.”

“Miss Granger with Kingsley and (Y/n), again on a thestral—“

Hermione smiles warmly at you and Kingsley, though it’s actually Harry’s crooked grin.

You aren’t surprised with who your father’s paired you with, Kingsley was honestly the only person he trusted with his life. He felt safest with the two of you together. And Hermione was resourceful as well, making the three of you probably the best team.

“Which leaves you and me, Ron!” Tonk’s cheers, hair fluctuating between pink and orange.

Ron, however, doesn’t look too pleased with the setup.

Harry and Hagrid are of course paired up together on his motorbike.

“I make it three minutes until we’re supposed to leave.” Your father grunts, glancing at his pocket watch. “No point locking the back door, it won’t keep the Death Eaters out when they come looking...come on...”

You turn to Remus, eyes suddenly brimming with tears. The lump in your throat makes it hard to breathe.

“You stay safe, alright?” You whisper, voice cracking.

“Hey, look at me, love.” He utters softly. A finger rests on the bottom of your chin, faces close together. Reluctantly you bring your gaze up to his own honey brown ones, shining with unshed tears. “We’ll be alright, yeah? We’ll be fine.” He tried his best to be convincing, he really does, but it falls flat.

Whatever movement is happening around you fades away.

“I love you, Remus.” You force out almost breathlessly. You might tell him this everyday but he needs to know. He needs to understand it.

“I love you, (Y/n).” He kisses you, lips chapped against your own, but it doesn’t even matter. “I’ll see you soon.”

Hesitantly, the two of you part, him to one of the twins and you to your father.

While everyone else is preparing and saying possibly their final words, your father stands alone, surveying the space.

“Let me have a look at you, yeah?” He grunts, eyes raking over your figure as you approach. “Just like your mother.”

“Mum probably would’ve thought this was a stupid idea too.” You attempt to joke.

You father rests his heavy hands on your shoulders, the weight oddly comforting.

“Yeah well, she thought all my plans were stupid.” He mutters. “She’d be proud, y’know? Fighting for what’s right.”

Your lip trembles which your father notices immediately.

“Oh, c’mere.” He wraps his arms around you, engulfing you in a rare hug.

Alastor “Mad-Eye” Moody was the best Auror out there with a tough exterior that frightened most to death, but he was always a soft and caring father when it came to you.

“Don’t cry, (Y/n), hm?” His scruffy chin rests on top of your head. “I love ya, I know I don’t say it too often, but I do. I’m so proud...” His own gruff voice catches at the end.

“I love you too, dad.” You sniff, pulling away and wiping your eyes with your sleeves. “You’ll be alright with Mundungus?”

“Eh, the little bastard’s harmless.” He shrugs, trying to wipe his own eye quickly. “If you don’t come back in one piece, Kingsley’ll never see the light of day, though.”

“Wouldn’t expect anything less from you.” You chuckle.

Mad-Eye glances at his watch. “Damnit.” He mutters. “We’ve got to go. Stay safe, (Y/n).”

“You too, dad.” You reply, making your way to Hermione and Kingsley at your ride.

Your thestral is dark and practically skin and bone like usual. Being in two iterations of the Order of the Phoenix has unfortunately granted you to see threstrals in all their hauntingly beautiful glory.

“Good luck, everyone!” Mad-Eye shouts. “See you all in about an hour at the Burrow! On the count of three. One...two...THREE!”

You hang on tightly to the Harry in front of you, Kingsley guiding the animal to soar into the night sky, the wind almost taking your breath away. You have your wand at the ready, pointing into the void.

Hands shake both from the cold atmosphere and the nerves running through you.

All you do is blink, and five hooded figures have you surrounded, deathly close to you.

“We’ve got company!” You shout over the roaring wind.

You and Hermione fire off spells, Kingsley trying to multitask, but getting away from the cloaked figures was a bit more important.

The two of you try to dodge the best you can, but it’s hard when you’re sitting on the back of a horse.

You don’t know what you cast in the moment, but your body seizes and suddenly one drops like an anvil to the ground below.

The bone chilling feeling of death overtakes you and You-Know-Who, shrouded in a black cloak, quickly rushes past the three of you.

The battle seems like it lasts forever, the back and forth of spells almost unbearable, but eventually you make it to your meeting point, completely exhausted.

•

All Character Taglist: @aspiringsloth20 @amourtentiaa @cherie-draco @mullthingsoverinthehotwater

[oqal]

God, that’d be an awful conversation though, like she went into labor overnight and so he ended up back at work to handle the morning meeting and just get everybody briefed on whatever they need to do and he just looks stressed and tired like “oh no no, I’m okay, just early labor” “LABOR :0?!” “With a surprise twin” and that was a fun day. Ironic, iconic, and toaster babies.

Just give her 1000 dollars to make the pain not as hard.

lol the task force will be FLABBERGASTED

reagan’s labor though? super quick, at least with may. i’m still keeping the idea from the fic asbmf that she does go into labor one rainy night but she only thinks it’s braxton hicks, until they show up to the hospital and she’s already dilated at like 6 cm

may? she comes out fast, like lightning fast, reagan barely got into the delivery room and may came right after that. ian’s a bigger struggle because he’s all the way in the back of the womb, he wants to get out but reagan’s already in so much pain it’s hard to push him out. he almost doesn’t make it because he’s very small and his lungs are bruised from under his ribs, probably because he had to share a womb with ms. kicker over here.

but she does after like twenty minutes of HARD pushing. poor thing is so exhausted and in so much pain, shocked she had two but <333 and they’re both alive! can you imagine when she holds both of them after? the wonder in her eyes, some tears coming out? the VERY little newborn infant cries and cuddles? it’s all worth it for her after that

brett is ofc crying so happy because not one baby, two!!!! a boy and a girl! but they have work literally in like six hours after she’s done delivering, everyone’s still asleep, reagan’s obviously in no shape to go to work (even though she suggests she wants to go but brett is like you literally just gave birth) SO he goes to cognito for like an hour to brief the team

and sometimes he looks tired, right? reagan’s pregnancy was tasking and sometimes if reagan couldn’t sleep, he wouldn’t either. he’s her maid so ofc he looks tired but happy. after labor, brett is TIRED, stressed, happy, checking his phone consistently, and the task force is like “uh are you okay? did reagan keep you up again?”

he’s like “OH, oh yeah, fuck i forgot to say, reagan gave birth a few hours ago, she wanted me to brief y’all on this week’s mission but i gotta go after that”

the task team is like “WHAT??? she gave birth? is she okay? is baby okay?”

brett is so tired and does a little hand wave like “yeah, reagan and the babies are doing good! the boy gave us a scare, i thought i was gonna have a heart attack”

and they’re the ones having the heart attack like “BABIES??? THE BOY??? TWINS????” and they’re all rushing out of the war room past brett to go to the hospital lmao

[magnificentmuses]

Man Walmart is bs...

Got pulled into the office earlier and was told we’d have to ‘part our ways’. The reason? My occurrences, I had 8.5 and you can’t go over 5 without termination. That’s bad of me, right? Except not. Four of those points shouldn’t have been there.

2 were cleared back in May by a coach, who has since left Walmart, and inexplicably reappeared about a week or two ago. I’ve been trying to talk to my team leads constantly about this but every time I looked? They were busy, and even when I tried to talk to them, they kept saying to either find them later, or they’d find me when they could talk (which was never).

And the other 2? They were from two Sundays, Sundays that my people lead said she would change the schedule and take me off for, which is the way it’s supposed to be. Each time this happened, she didn’t change the schedule, and I asked a team lead what to do, and he said to work the changed schedule (so, Sunday off) instead, and he’d take care of the points for those Sundays.

The kicker is that the team lead I talked to about that was one of the very two team leads I was talking to about my points TODAY. So like, he KNEW why those points were there. Well, more accurately, he probably just forgot. But still.

Luckily after explaining all of this, he said he’d bring me back down to 4.5 points, that I’d have to be careful, and that this was my first and only warning.

It was just...stressful as hell.

Especially since, if they HAD fired me, they’d be firing me for listening to and believing in my superiors when they told me things. Like the coach who wiped those first two points, or the team lead that said he’d take care of those Sunday points. Or my people lead who said she’d change my schedule but never did despite me often reminding her of it.

[mocacheezy]

And the title of "Was so amusing I forgot he was supposed to represent a ruthless villain" goes to: ✨Beast Wars Megatron (1996)✨

[Show spoilers below, but you probably know that already.]

Extra note: I am a TF newbie. This is my opinion and I don't have all the details for the many continuities that exist. I just need to scream about a purple T-Rex.

As the shows main villain, he seems more comical than threatening, but during the second and third season he:

Cut out an immortal spark from a failed Maximal science experiment, and continuously used it to torture said experiment (both for his amusement AND practicality, since Rampage would destroy him otherwise)

Called a deformed protoform ugly, "with an ugly name to match its appearance", and called it useless since it is unable to transform.

(Yeah, the above doesn't sound bad or unusual by villain standards, but these are things that had me go "What the fuck, aren't you the theatre kid of a villain? What is this?!", so if it made me react like that it's on the list. The following things also contribute to my reaction)

Set up the before mentioned protoform to an impossible task of essentially killing all Maximals and bringing proof of their deactivation as a test of its competence (bring me their heads... Dramatic✨)

By calling it useless since "It can't even transform!", he is spitting on the name of his predecessor, the original Megatron

(I am atleast 90% certain that G1 Megatron (and any other Megatron really) would take a look at it, figure out if it can hold a gun/fight/be useful and let it fight. Can't even transform my ass, as long as it can be manipulated and/or fight for the Cons it doesn't matter if it can or can't transform you copper bitch!)

Decided to cut the Maximal science experiment's immortal spark in half to create a new Frankensteined transmetal super soldier.

In order to obtain more power he took the original Megatron's spark and "mingled" it with his. And by mingled, I mean he inserted it into his own spark chamber with his own spark and kept it there. Not intending to return it to the original frame most likely.

Until the very last episode of the third season, until the last 10 or so minutes, it looked like he was going to win. I am talking the whole "Are the good guys going to win?" kind of doubt on my end.

But the real kicker and the reason why I'm so shocked?

He was in character through all of this! He didn't get "more evil" or "crazier" or "ruthless" as the seasons progressed. He wasn't "meaner" or "less charismatic". He behaved precisely as he did in the first season, same dramatics in his movements and speech and all of that!

The only difference was that he was doing something actually threatening and villainous in front of us viewers!

That's what had me staring at the screen with wide eyes; the fact I got fooled by his personality and didn't perceive him as an actual threat.

From the 3 shows I finished watching so far (Prime, Animated, Beast Wars) he threw me in for the biggest fucking loop.

Because with other Megatrons it's very clear what kind of a villain they are from the start:

Prime Megatron looks like a threat, moves like a threat, and while he has charisma, we don't see it that often. And he has dramatics, but those are mostly reserved for fights with Optimus or Unicron-poprock-crystal-candy induced hallucinations. And even then it's more like grand, over the top speeches, not silliness.

Animated Megatron has class. He is charismatic and uses this to his advantage to the extreme. He manipulates everyone and anyone, his followers are ready to fight eachother for a crumb of his praise, and a chance to be called "most loyal". He has dramatics (more than just the fact he twists his oil barrels into goblets) and he has embarassing moments infront of his troops, but those are due to circumstances, not him being silly.

I am in the process of watching Cyberverse, and so far this Megatron is a threat, doesn't seem like much of a threat when fighting the autobots, and to my limited spoiler-fueled knowledge, will become a bigger threat later on.

Take another look at Beast Wars Megatron and tell me if you'd consider this guy a threat:

He monologues and laughs TheVillainLaugh so often, you start to expect it and just wait for it most episodes. At one point he laughs so hard he ends up choking on it. And after his coughing fit he resumes his plan monologue as if nothing happened. And it's not like the other Predacons don't acknowledge their boss' behaviour:

That doesn't mean he doesn't have some loyal Predacons; Scorponok, Waspinator and Inferno being the ones that come to mind (also the ones that crave his approval and praise the most), with the other Preds leaning more towards treachery. But how he handles treachery or disobedience or even talking back, where it seems like he's bantering, not threatening them,

His personality just doesn't fit with the traits and behaviours the other two Megatrons exibit, the kind of traits that I started to expect of Megatron as a character.

He doesn't fit my perception of a Megatron that is a threat.

Which, considering the narrative of transformers, says alot about me and the way I essentially placed the character into a mold and went "alright, angry, commands and demands attention, can be ruthless, is stupid enough to keep a guy as his SIC/ on his team, despite multiple murder attempts and scheming".

Now, if we get into actual details, Beast Wars Megatron wouldn't count as "an actual Megatron", since the show itself is set after the Great War between the autobots and decepticons, G1 timeline. This Megatron took his predecessors name, so for all we know his name could be Joe before he changed it.

But his actions and the "destroy and conquer and lay the groundwork for future plans while you're causing mayhem" thing he has going on? That is Megatron behaviour as far as I can see.

And, granted, Beast Wars is the oldest out of the three shows I've watched (Animated 2007, Prime 2011), and so he is older than both of them, his characterization might be much closer to G1 than both Prime and Animated!

But before this becomes a full on essay full of misinformation (and more spelling mistakes), I'll just give my thanks to each continuity being it's own thing, with enough variety to keep you on your toes, while expecting how the general plot might go.

I hate that I can't even fully hate him, because he is so incredibly entertaining, so I am stuck looking @ the screen, cursing the fucking prehistoric grape lizard fidget spinner of the future, because he is so vile but he does it in style.

Here's a flattering picture of him as I seethe.

🎉Congratulations you metal Barney on rollerskates!🎉 You are truly despicable, the worst! I hope you choke on a rubber ducky💕

[He also gets a smaller trophy for his Transmetal MegaMode (or whatever it is called officially), because its a fucking dragon. He went from a bubblegum T-rex, to a copper rollerskating T-rex that can fly, to a red and gold dragon that can breathe fire and ice. So yeah, drastic transformation wise, no competition here, as well as levels of drama that came with each alt.]

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

[this week’s T5F was requested by anon]

Top 5 Worst Choices That Didn’t Matter

“This game series adapts to the choices you make. The story is tailored by how you play.”

......Yeah okay, Telltale. 

There are a lot of important choices to make over the course of the twdg series, but as we all know, not every single choice matters. One of the biggest things people tend to complain about Telltale games is the illusion of choice and “my choices don’t matter! We all get the same ending anyway!” which is fair, I get it. 

I personally try to look at the choices in a more positive light. Like, yeah it doesn’t matter if you cut Lee’s arm off or not. No matter what, you can’t save him and he’s going to die at the end of S1. Except that choice does matter, just not in the way we wanted it to. It matters because it shapes the story we the player want to tell. 

Who is your Lee? Is he willing to do anything to rescue Clementine? Including cutting his own arm off if it means giving him just enough time to get to her, even though it’s going to hurt like hell and could possibly leave him worse off? 

Or is your Lee someone who won’t risk that, even if there is the smallest hope that they cut it off in time and he could live? He’s willing to let the infection spread and kill him because he needs both arms and all the energy he has left to get to Clementine?

Sure, it doesn’t matter in the end-- Lee still dies, but two armed Lee isn’t the same man as one armed Lee, and that’s important to your story. Plus, that choice is memorable as hell. 

But these kinds of choices that are impactful to your story in various ways? Yeah, we’re not talking about those today. Nope. Today we’re talking about choices that meant absolutely nothing. They never came back, they didn’t impacted the story in a meaningful way, they’re forgetful, and they’re just the worst. I don’t like ‘em.

Before we get started, just wanna shoutout @pi-creates​ for helping me bounce all these choices around and reminding me of so many things I forgot.

5.  Telling Clementine to bring AJ back to Richmond

One of the last choices you’ll make as Javier Garcia happens during a conversation with Clementine. The two are talking about AJ and Clementine’s wondering if she was a good mom [which still don’t love the direction they went there for okay ANF] and Javi has the choice to tell her to bring AJ back to Richmond, or to leave him at the ranch. 

And funny enough.... this means nothing. It does nothing. It’s said and nothing is remembered. Clementine never brings AJ back, she never mentions Javi telling her to bring him or leave him... all we get is a single line in TFS during the ranch flashback where Clementine says that they can’t go back because it’s a warzone that way.... but she says that no matter what. 

It also doesn’t help that this come at the very end of the season but isn’t a huge choice the affects the endings. I dunno if they were trying to plant ideas that “Ooohh this choice could decide whether Clem sees the Garcia’s ever again! Clementine’s story isn’t over y’all! The Garcia’s could come back and we could see Richmond again!”

But then TFS happened and they were like “Ha, that’s stupid, no one likes the Garcia’s.” and they are never mentioned by name again. 

4. Helping Sarah in the green house

Ugh, okay.

So, there’s this point in S2 where you’re trapped in Howe’s and put to work in the green house with Sarah and Reggie. Y’see, Sarah isn’t doing so good at this. Carver got pissed at her for talking earlier and forced Carlos to slap her... which he did, and it knocked her on her ass, and now she’s in shock. 

Then ya got Reggie who keeps talking about how he’s on thin ice with Carver but also he’s this close to being let out of the holding area, so behave and all will be chill. He gives you a task to trip and pick berries or whatever, when you notice that Sarah is just kinda standing there.

So you got a choice: Do you focus on your own work, or do you help Sarah out?

Well, it doesn’t matter what you pick. 

It.... it literally doesn’t matter. Sure, you could argue that it helps Sarah out and adds friendship points with her.... except no, not really. It’s never brought up again. She doesn’t even guilt you if you don’t help her, which is something you’d expect from these games. 

Oh, and Reggie dies no matter what. Yeah, Carver comes in and thinks a couple of berry bushes is the perfect reason to throw this man off of a rooftop... but then he doesn’t do anything to Clementine or Sarah either way. He doesn’t get mad if you help, he doesn’t go after Sarah if you don’t.... and it’s never mentioned again. Reggie’s death is, but your specific choice isn’t.

3.  Stealing from Arvo 

Oooooh boy, gotta love the Arvo choice. 

So, you and Jane are trying to find a safe place for Rebecca to have her baby when you see this kid walk up carrying a bag. He’s pretty harmless, and he’s more scared of you than you are of him. Jane gets the jump on him, and you check out the bag he’s carrying. 

Turns out, he’s got a shit ton of medicine.... medicine that your group could really use. Arvo panics and begs you not to steal from him, claiming it’s for his sick sister. You gotta decide if you want to rob him or not.

And it doesn’t matter. 

The best I can do to defend this is by kinda comparing it to when you steal from the Stranger’s car in S1. It’s more of a moral choice to shape Clementine, y’know? Except it doesn’t really do anything..... Clementine isn’t branded a thief after this, she doesn’t go around just stealing shit [though she can steal Pete’s watch but that’s another story]. But if you do want to keep stretching, then the next entry on this list could be seen as a continuation of Clementine’s thieving ways if you so choose.... but that choice is here, too, soooo take that for what you will. 

If you steal the medicine, you have this pill bottle that you can give to Rebecca but that barely matters, too. They don’t help or harm her when she’s giving birth, they do nothing for AJ, and no matter what you do.... Arvo’s squad ambushes you.

And it means nothing.

Arvo will always claim you stole from him, even if you didn’t. Rebecca will always die and someone will always shoot her, causing a shootout to happen where no one in your group dies.

Yeah, no one but Arvo’s squad dies. Mike gets shot, and so does Luke but that’s it. 

Oh, and stealing from him is never brought up again after that.... because it doesn’t matter. 

Even if they did something where if you stole from him, then one of your group members dies because of some bullshit reason, then it would mean something but as it is now? Nothin’.

2. Injecting AJ with medicine 

Oh hello, ANF, you’re back. 

This flashback is annoying on so many levels... Alright, AJ is sick and everyone has told Clementine that there’s nothing anyone can do to help him, but she gets her hands on the name of a medicine she thinks will help. So she sneaks around and finds the medicine, but of course, she can only give it to him as an injection. 

Instead of doing the smart thing and taking the medicine and moving away from the group to give to AJ in a safe location where she won’t get caught, she sticks around for Lingard to wake up, and he’s high outta his mind so that’s fun. 

He tells her that it’s not going to help him and to just put it back. She knows what they do to thieves around here but he won’t tell anyone. It’s up to you, do you put it back or inject AJ?

Well, guess what? 

Clementine gets caught either way and the drugs are either in AJ or smashed on the floor, David becomes a flipflop with his “We shoulda abandoned AJ long ago to die >:O but also you can’t take him because he’ll die out there!” and they kick Clementine out for being a dingus. 

And here’s the kicker.... AJ is alive no matter what. He gets through whatever sickness he had and went to the ranch. You injecting him or not did nothing... no side affects, nothing. I’m sure they didn’t want to go super dark by killing AJ off [except they kinda did since there’s a lot of scrapped concepts with a dead AJ] depending on if you injected him or not..... but at least it would’ve been something. Hell, maybe no kill him since we need him for TFS, but maybe it would affect if he went to the ranch or not to begin with. Maybe if he got worse, they sent him somewhere else and that would affect where Clementine went to get him back for the flashbacks in TFS.

Again, you could look at this as what Clementine would be willing to do for AJ........ but it doesn’t enhance the story in any meaningful way.  It affects what Clementine you get in the end, but that’s just some text on the screen. 

I dunno, this choice could’ve done something... that’s all I’m saying. 

1. Teaching Sarah to shoot

Once again, Sarah finds herself on my dumb lists... and not in a good way. Sigh. 

Alright, you wanna talk about the worst choice that meant absolutely nothing? Nothing at all? 

You get back to the cabin in S2 after leaving either Nick or Pete, and Carlos asks you to watch Sarah while they go out to look for the rest. You find Sarah, you can take some pictures, and then she asks where her dad is. 

She gets anxious and sits on the floor....but then she does something interesting. She pulls out a gun she found. It’s not loaded or anything, but she asks Clementine if she can teach her how to use it.

And you’re probably thinking, “Oh, that’s a good idea. She should know how to use a gun, but her dad is too over protective. This could help us in the future.” or “Oof, no, Sarah isn’t ready for a gun. What if that comes back and bites me in the ass? What if she shoots someone I don’t want her to shoot?”

Well, don’t worry your pretty little head because nothing comes of this.

Nothing.

You teach her to shoot, and it does nothing. She never picks up another gun ever again, she never does anything with what you taught her, and nothing happens. 

Just.... wow. 

At the very least... with the other picks on this list, you could stretch and make some sort of excuse for it having an impact on the story.... but this doesn’t do anything to further your relationship with Sarah, Carlos never finds out about it, there’s never a point where Sarah admits she found the gun, she doesn’t use it, she doesn’t give it to Clementine or anyone else to you, and it does nothing.

This scene could be completely removed and it wouldn’t change anything... which honestly, is something I can’t say for the rest of these dumb choices. 

That’s what makes this the ultimate pointless choice. 

---

Dishonorable Mentions

-Asking to go with Mike at the end of S2. Arvo will shoot Clementine no matter what and it’s dumb. -Keeping quiet about Mari when David asks you to. It doesn’t affect anything other than David being upset for two seconds, but you get thrown out and it doesn’t matter. -Trying to help Christa in S2 ep1. Either way, she gets shot at and you never see her again and it just doesn’t matter. -Honestly 400 Days.... just all of it. The only thing you get is pointless cameos if you get everyone to go with Tavia.  -Being nice to Larry. He still treats you like shit and accuses you of being a bitch to him anyway soooo.... yeah.  -Fixing the swing in S1 ep2. If you don’t do it, then Andy will.

----

It’s pretty telling that this T5F is just S2 and ANF choices.... sigh. Like sure, there are a lot of choices that don’t really matter in the grand scheme of things in S1 and TFS but most of those I can justify as being there to shape your story and are impactful in different ways..... but boy, there’s just something about S2 and ANF and their choices, isn’t there? 

Anyway, what do you guys think? Do you agree with my choices or nah? Do you have a choice you don’t like and think is meaningless that wasn’t on the list? Lemme know, I’d love to hear it! 

Have any suggestions for future T5F’s? Feel free to send ‘em in! :D

—

Next week’s T5F Top 5 Reasons Javier Garcia’s Pretty Great

[suganovakawa]

A scenario of reader getting jealous when a girl try’s to shoot her shot with bokuto? ❤️

AHHHHH YES jealous scenarios are MUAH and i get to write about kou ??? ugh yes i do b blessed doe

𝐀𝐂𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒 .

PAIRINGS : koutarou bokuto x fem! reader

GENRE : fluff , slight comedy

SYNOPSIS : you’ve been wanting to confess your feelings to the happy-go-lucky ace of fukurodani for a while , but every time the opportunity presents itself , you chicken out . you’ve gotten motivation to try again once more — but all of a sudden you overhear someone else wanting to confess to bokuto ? not on your watch !

word count : 2.4k

— check out my masterlist !!

a / n : WOOOOOOO i love bokuto unconditionally; needless to say, this was much much much fun to write!

⠀you were a hopeless mess.

⠀yet again, you failed to do the one, the one thing you've been wanting to do for the entire school year. you slumped away in shame as bokuto found his way back to akaashi, the two males soon walking away to volleyball practice.

⠀today was supposed to be the day, dammit!

⠀you were finally going to confess your feelings to him!

⠀everything went so smoothly until you chickened out; today was the perfect day to tell koutarou how you felt about him. the plan you set up for yourself was perfect - hook, line and sinker. the kicker was, you pulled too early and didn't get a catch. your eyes had closed once you were outside of fukurodani, your hands making way to your face as you muffled your yell of disappointment.

⠀your friends were gonna get a kick out of this one tomorrow.

⠀they placed a bet on this time today, all of them fed up of you chickening out countless of times. oh, the amount of yen you owed them tomorrow. they thought for sure that with money on the line, you'd step into shape and gather the guts to make the confession quick. it didn't matter if kou accepted your feelings or not - god, you really hoped he would - you just needed to finally step up and do it already.

⠀you felt kinda stupid, just standing in front of your school after hours. you had no reason to be there - none of the teachers were able to stay after school today, so you couldn't just camp out in a classroom and wait for a second wind to confess. at least, try to confess.

⠀koutarou bokuto was literally the most easy going person anyone could ever meet. the positive energy levels he possessed were through the roof; it was contagious, too - he hardly ever failed to make anyone smile, regardless of who they were, and how they were previously feeling. at least, that's how you managed to fall for the ace of fukurodani - you happened to bump into him after one of the worst days in history, and all it took to make you smile again was a couple of jokes and a "HEY HEY HEY" before he patted you on the shoulder and ran off for practice.

⠀your eyes caught a glimpse of long hair sneaking by you, a box of chocolates in her hand as she entered the school stealthily. if you hadn't noticed her eye from the corner of your eye, you probably wouldn't have noticed her creeping by you. your lips pressed together as she disappeared into the school, and something didn't feel right.

⠀chocolate was associated with love.

⠀with valentine's day.

⠀as a stress reliever.

⠀as a way to win someone over.

⠀was she going to confess to someone?

⠀your e/c eyes widened as it hit, she was going to confess to someone! she clearly had more guts than you; she'd probably end up doing it. but who was she going to confess to? there were hardly any others at school after hours today, besides the volleyball team.

⠀your stomach dropped. was she going to confess to someone on the volleyball team?

⠀even worse - was she going to confess to bokuto?

⠀oh no.

⠀no no no no no.

⠀before you could start thinking rationally, your worries got to you as you turned, your legs moving into a nervous jog as you brought yourself back inside of fukurodani. this was your big break, you couldn't let that happen. you were the one who was going to confess to bokuto, not anyone else! your jogging soon turned to sprinting, your mind figuring out where that girl was, and how you were either going to stop her, or find koutarou first.

⠀you then stopped abruptly. what the hell were you gonna do next?

⠀what, were you going to confess your feelings for him, or something?

⠀your second wind was already dying down, and you hadn't even stood face to face with bokuto yet. throwing in the towel already seemed like the easier option, to let that girl confess to your beloved owl boy and watch them have their happy ending.

⠀"y/n?" your thoughts paused as you turned around to see akaashi himself, looking at you quizically as you just stood in the middle of the hallway. "why are you still here? practice just ended."

⠀"it did?" were you really in a daze outside for that long you didn't even realize how much time passed? "oh! i, uhm, forgot something in a classroom. i just came back quickly to get it, that's all." you looked around for a few seconds before turning back to keiji once more. "where's bokuto? he's usually with you, right?"

⠀"oh, him." he chuckled, bringing a hand up to support the bag over his shoulders. "i promised him i'd wait outside; he's currently with some girl, she wanted to talk to him right after practice. knowing him, he'll probably be out pretty quickly. he'll reject her as he rejects everyone else."

⠀"reject?" your heart sunk at the word alone. "you mean, she's confessing to him right now?"

⠀"oh, yeah. she actually spoke to me earlier today, wanted to make sure that bokuto was available after practice to confess. i was the one who recommended she give him chocolates, too." he stopped speaking for a few moments, before a small smile took over his lips at the very obvious sight of your distress. "bokuto and that girl are right in front of the gym, just down the hall - in front of the main doors. in case you're here for... other purposes."

⠀your mind went blank. "huh?"

⠀"it's not my place to pry, so that's all i have to really say." his usually stoic eyes held a glint of something mischievous as he shrugged. "in my honest opinion, y/n - you have a much better chance of confessing than she does. just saying." he waved to you before walking away. "good luck, now."

⠀that second wind blew you over the moment keiji disappeared outside of the school. you had to get there, to koutarou. now.

⠀you were a bit flustered that akaashi read you like a book, but it worked in your favor as your legs gained the momentum to sprint to their location, your breath caught in your throat as you hid behind a set of lockers, right near where you overheard a mostly one-sided conversation going on.

⠀"i really hope you like these chocolates, bokuto! i bought them especially for you, i heard these ones are your favorites!"

⠀"you don't say, huh? well, thank you very much!"

⠀"and there's something else i wanted to tell you, too! i-if you'd let me, that is."

⠀your breathing shortened as a whole. this was it. she was going to do it.

⠀"oh, sure! just be quick though, akaashi is waiting for me outside."

⠀"i-i've liked you for a while, bokuto! a lot!"

⠀well that was certainly quick. you felt your heart drop in your stomach as she confessed so hastily, you didn't even realize it was a confession until it registered in your head moments later. defeat hung in the air as you began to turn and flee, like you always do, but not before koutarou had a chance to reply.

⠀"aww, i like you too, y'know! you're a great friend, and very thoughtful to have bought me these chocolates! i'm glad we're friends!"

⠀you suppressed an uneasy cough at his reply. that was friendzoning, right?

⠀"o-oh, yeah. f-friends! yeah, we're great friends, bokuto..." your chest clenched painfully at the dejection in her voice. you felt kinda sorry for her, in a way. giving her a pat on the back sounded like a magnificent option. "i-i'll see you around, i guess... good ol' friend of mine."

⠀your face contorted into a cringe before pressing your back against the locker, watching with a held breath as she ran away, not noticing your cheap hiding spot as she left the school in a hurry. the butterflies in your stomach were acting up more than usual; you had to get out of there.

⠀"i think the coast is clear..." lifting yourself from the lockers, you took a deep breath, only to bump into a certain someone as he turned the corner. you suppressed a scream as koutarou looked down at you with his big friendly grin - that same grin that probably friendzoned that poor girl. "b-bokuto! funny i've run into you today!"

⠀"y/n! hello!" his eyes lit up at the sound of your voice. "what are you doing here, after school? no teachers are here today."

⠀"ah, yeah, i know..." bringing a hand awkwardly to the back of your neck, your own eyes drifted to look at your feet. "actually, i-i was... looking for you. but i see you're busy, so please don't let me bother-"

⠀"oh no, you weren't bothering me at all!" he interrupted you a little too eagerly, causing your head to snap upwards and look at him in astonishment. you gasped in horror as he handed you the same box of chocolates he was gifted not too long ago. "care for these? they're not actually my favorite."

⠀"they... aren't?" you hesitated on taking the box - after all, they were bought for him, not you. "but didn't someone buy them for you, bokuto?"

⠀"yeah, but it came with a confession. i feel kinda bad, eating the chocolates from someone who i rejected." he laughed it off, shaking his head as he pushed the box into your hands once more. "c'mon, i won't tell anyone, so don't feel bad."

⠀"thanks, i guess...?" against your better judgement, you took the chocolates from kou and held them in your arms loosely. this was awkward. "i should get going now, i'll see you around?"

⠀"but y/n, thought you said you were looking for me? what is it you need?" your face flushed as the third year's lips formed into a pout, his head tilted slightly as he looked at you confusedly. "i can just text akaashi if it's too long, i'm sure he won't mind!"

⠀"w-well, i..." every part of your body was yelling at you to run. escape. flee. anything to get way from the current situation. this was just setting yourself up for utter failure. you'd much rather lose a yen bet than have koutarou bokuto reject you. "it's nothing too important, i assure you!"

⠀"it's important enough to have made you wait until after school to tell me, y'know." a nervous lump caught in your throat as he narrowed his golden eyes.

⠀damn, he got you there.

⠀"y-you're right about that..." you hesitated, the confession just bubbling in the back of your throat, waiting to explode. this was now or never. and you chose now. "i... i wanted to confess to you. i like you, bokuto. i like like you. a lot, actually. i have for a while, i've just been too shy to say anything until now. but after hearing your run in with the other girl, i understand if we're just going to be friends! totally, absolutely fine." your hid your tomato of a face downwards after spitting everything out in one go, your stomach spinning a mile a minute but a ton of bricks sliding off of your shoulders at the same time. at least you didn't owe your friends money now, right?

⠀"aww, i like you too, y/n!"

⠀your eyes met kou's, your embrace around the second-hand gift tightening. "haha, as friends, right?"

⠀"what? no. i like like you too, y/n."

⠀WHAT?

⠀you didn't even catch onto his obvious reply as he pulled you into a hug, his arms wrapping around you securely as he let out a laugh. "i've liked you for a while too, y/n!" he exclaimed jovially. "i didn't want to confess to you either, i always assumed you didn't like me in that way."

⠀"are you kidding? literally almost everyone likes you in that way! i certainly am no different." you could hear your heart beating in your ears as you gathered enough self control to hug him back just as tightly instead of just screaming out of pure shock.

⠀"well, i always assumed you weren't part of that 'almost'. it still feels like a dream that you are." he pulled away from the hug, but kept you in his arms. the feeling of it was entirely surreal. "i've always wanted you to be the one to confess to me, so i would reject every other confession in my way. after so many confessions, though, i nearly gave up." he grinned goofily. "but i didn't, and look at what my luck gave me! you!"

⠀"bokuto-"

⠀"it's koutarou to you now, missy." kou leaned down and left a kiss on your forehead to seal the deal. "i'm so happy right now, y/n! this is awesome! i'm gonna take you out this weekend, so count on it!"

⠀"could you please hurry up already? i've been waiting for twenty minutes now." you squeaked as a displeased keiji appeared behind you and bokuto, his arms impatiently crossed. once he saw you, though, he smiled. "ah, i see. looks like luck was on your side after all, y/n."

⠀"akaashi!" you paused for a second, looking down at the chocolates in your possession before bringing your eyes back to him. "i thought you said you recommended koutarou's favorites to her?"

⠀"oh, that. i lied." he chuckled. "if you really know bokuto, you'd know that he doesn't have favorites."

⠀you looked to kou, who nodded his head in agreement.

⠀"anyways, if you two are just going to stay here and hug in the middle of the hallway for another twenty minutes, i'll see myself home." keiji waved before placing his hands in his pockets. "i'll see you two tomorrow." you tried waving goodbye to the setter as he walked off, but you were abruptly pulled into another embrace.

⠀"hugging for another twenty minutes? that sounds wonderful!" bokuto smiled widely as he held you in his arms. "but maybe we shouldn't be doing that in school. i'll walk you home, y/n! i can give you a goodbye kiss from there."

⠀"thank you, koutarou!" a happy blush colored your cheeks nicely as he stepped back from the hug, only to stand at your side and lock fingers with you, leading you outside. a kiss? oh how you were so looking forward to that. you nibbled on your own bottom lip excitedly as the ace of hearts threw you into a random conversation about volleyball; you didn't know much about the sport, but with how much koutarou had to say on the subject, you were able to just listen to his voice and enjoy your time together walking home.

⠀man, you really were a hopeless mess.

taglist : @yams046

ask if you’d like to be part of my gen taglist! and don’t be afraid to make any specifications, either.

[ao3-sucks]

An Archive of Someone’s Own: my experiences being groomed in fandom circles on AO3

TW: Childhood sexual abuse, grooming, mentions of incest and rape.

I used to be a big writer of fanfiction. It was the logical choice for me. I loved to write and create bold and immersive worlds, and I craved an audience who would enjoy my work as much as I did. Since my writing wasn’t actually good, I needed a community of other amateurs who wouldn’t mind that, and by tweaking my characters and settings into ones from canonical media, I got the audience I so craved.

I started writing fanfiction online when I was 14, posting initially on FanFiction.net and then moving to AO3 a few months later. As I got back into writing original fiction towards the end of high school, I lost interest in this community, and it’s been a long time since I posted anything much on AO3.

I’ve always struggled with the fact I display a lot of symptoms of CSA, and for the longest time, I couldn’t figure out why. Throughout my teen years, I refused to get changed or bathe when anyone was even vaguely nearby, constantly paranoid about being spied on; I developed a severe touch phobia, and would have frequent panic attacks from something as small as brushing arms with a passerby; I resolutely identified as asexual and refused to get into anything resembling a relationship with others because the very concept disgusted and repulsed me.

Weird, considering I had grown up pretty normal and all of these symptoms had started around my early teens. It was only when I told my friends about my friendship with a 30 year old I had met online that the pieces started falling into place for me.

Child grooming is usually discussed in the context of one adult going out of their way to befriend a child with the goal of lowering their resistance to sexual abuse, through normalisation and friendliness. I’d like to talk about how that worked on the fanfiction website AO3. Since it’s an open website and most communication takes place between anonymous users or accounts in the comments section of a work, there is very little delineation between spaces for adults to discuss whatever dark topics they like and spaces for kids to do the same.

This frequently leads to pretty inappropriate conversations between people of widely varying ages and life experiences, which is how I ended up talking sex as a fourteen year old with people ranging from a couple of years older than me, who were generally okay, to more than twice my age. The 30 year old in question listed on her profile how many pedophilic ships she loved, and she knew my age but pushed me to keep discussing sexual topics with her. Sounds like a red flag, yeah? Well. I was 14, and very stupid.

This 30 year old woman, who I will call Aku (because it’s similar to her screen name and because it’s funny to name her after the bad guy from Samurai Jack) would start conversations with me whenever I posted anything to AO3 and would refuse to take no for an answer when I tried to back out of conversations with her, and since these conversations were public and occurring within comments, I didn’t want to be rude to her since this was taking place on content I was trying to promote.

I told her my age multiple times and she would either pretend she forgot from last time (saying her memory is super bad) or continue as though it was just trivia about me and not a sign she shouldn’t have been pushing me. My primary objection to what she would say to me (since most of it was just her being annoying) was her insistence on sexualising everything I wrote, and her determination to push me into writing pornographic content, which I eventually gave in to.

Yes, she was a terrible person. She emailed me using her personal email address, so I know her full name and place of residence, because she’s an idiot. These emails also contain sexually explicit materials. Nothing much ever happened between us except for these very creepy interactions and the fact we remained online friends for a few years. But here’s the thing: she wasn’t the only person pushing me into creating sexual content. Lots of people would comment on my writing demanding that I show explicit sexual content when I really didn’t want to.

After a while it felt like I couldn’t write a longer, romantic fanfiction without including explicit sexual content. Like my work wasn’t valid without it. Other, more popular writers were usually sexual in their content, and I wanted to be like them and bring in the views, right? So, when I look at my back catalog of works, I can see how my content moved from completely non-sexual to featuring sexual content over time, and the views usually came with. In this way, I was in an environment that was encouraging me on many levels to sexualise my own work, which impacted the way I thought about my creative process.

Here’s another example I remember. When I was a young sprout, I remember reading down someone’s list of fanfiction recommendations and seeing a work called Hug Therapy, which I promptly read. While the work is marked as explicit and containing the Loki/Thor pairing, the use of relationship and rating tags on AO3 is so poorly regulated that it didn’t really mean anything to me to see either of those. People tag hardcore material as non-explicit and tag friendships as relationships, because there’s no motivation to tag properly. Plus, someone I followed here on Tumblr had recommended it to me.

Now, you wouldn’t know from the listing, but while this piece starts out as comedy, it turns out in the end to include rape, incest, and BDSM in very explicit terms. The fact it was tagged as being explicit didn’t slow me down, because the liberal use of these tags could mean that an explicit tag was just there because sexual content was implied or mentioned, which I thought would be the case based on the rest of the listing. Out of curiosity, I recently tried to report this work to the moderators for containing no warnings about incest or rape, and I got this in response:

“Selecting “Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings” satisfies a creator’s obligation under the warnings policy. Users who wish to avoid specific elements entirely should not access fanworks marked with “Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings”. Our Terms of Service note: “You understand that using the Archive may expose you to material that is offensive, triggering, erroneous, sexually explicit, indecent, blasphemous, objectionable, grammatically incorrect, or badly spelled. ….. This decision is in accordance with our policy of maximum inclusiveness; we have therefore closed this case and will not be investigating further.”

Which, yeah, I guess. The frustration comes from how ‘Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings’ is an extremely commonly used tag, and most things that it’s used on are totally harmless.

This fanfiction, which I was recommended by a friend, is hugely popular, in the top 60 most read fanfictions in the entire fandom. You wanna hear the kicker? The author, Astolat, is one of the founders of AO3. They’re not just some random author who isn’t following the rules. They’re a creator of the whole website, and they made the rules. This is pretty telling about how seriously the website actually takes protecting their users.

My final example I want to give is one of fetish content. People in fetish communities generally (not always) say that fetishes are probably something one should work up to after the onset of sexual activity, especially potentially harmful stuff like BDSM. In the circles I was running in, if you weren’t sporting a fetish or two (no matter your age) you were a boring bitch.

Maybe this isn’t true of everywhere in the fanfiction community, but I used to feel that bizarre pressure until I got out. Bear in mind that my main time in this community was from ages 14 to 17. I never made my age a secret, either. I told people outright I was that age, I was in high school, I was playing hockey and studying The Great Gatsby when I wasn’t online.

Since I was in the Avengers fandom and I liked Loki and the Asgardians, I was frequently exposed to incestuous content between Loki and Thor, and a lot of it came out of nowhere or was poorly tagged. This was considered the norm, and while I at first felt completely horrified and repulsed, within a year or two I no longer gave a shit. It’s only in the last few years as I’ve begun to unpack everything that I’ve started to get that strong revulsion reaction to incestuous content.

In the circles I was in, it was relentlessly normal. Normal to the point that people who disliked it were usually shouted down. Even to this day, debate rages on in fandom spaces about whether or not content like this normalises this kind of abuse. In my own personal experience, which I don’t usually like to talk about, it absolutely does.

In real life, this normalisation started to have serious consequences for my mental health and interpersonal relationships. In fanfiction, any occasion when you are alone with someone could become sexual, any familial relationship is possibly sexual, and it doesn’t matter if you like it or not. I became incredibly anxious around male family members for fear of being sexually assaulted, and my OCD, which I had been developing since I was a child, turned from thoughts of physical violence to thoughts of graphically sexually assaulted by anyone and everyone around me.

My fear of being touched got to the point where I would have panic attacks if anyone came anywhere close to touching me. I quit sports, fucked up my romantic relationships, and didn’t hug anyone, not even members of my family, for years. All the while, I had bought my first laptop and was consuming more fanfiction than ever before. I struggled with my sexuality growing up, as I am bisexual, and while fanfiction provided LGBT content to help me, the content was frequently so disturbing that I viewed any expression of sexuality as something evil and predatory.

The community on AO3, whether you like it or not, is often sexual, and provides no barriers between the casual user looking for content and extremely intense fetish material. It’s sometimes called the Pornhub of fanfiction, but considering the wide range of people who use it, it’s more like if you opened Youtube and saw niche hardcore fetish videos just on the front page, recommended and trending.

Sure, you have to click a little button to confirm you’re 18 before you can actually read a story, but the tags and descriptions of readily available works can be extremely explicit. Fanfiction also brings you into close contact with fellow readers and the author, and encourages you to become a content creator, which in some ways makes it more dangerous.

I was affected much more strongly by what I saw than most people would be, because I was already treading shaky ground. But I’m also not the only person out there who has been hurt in this way. Most of my friends who grew up in fandom can report the impact that fanfiction culture had on them. One of my friends from high school knew a panoply of porn terms at age 14 or so due to reading fanfiction, and another of my other friends at high school almost exclusively read rape porn because it was her favourite. I didn’t have friends who watched porn; I had friends who read fanfiction. These are just as troubling to me as any other accounts of young people consuming visual porn from a very early age.

It’s frequently cited that fanfiction gives minority groups the opportunity for creative outlet. It was a great place for me to cut my teeth as a content creator, and a source of acceptance and kindness when times were tough. Fanfiction communities have historically been the domain of women and minorities, and create a space for these people to tell their own stories.

It’s largely because of this that fanfiction communities fear censorship and strict moderation, as they have been attacked in the past on homophobic or misogynistic grounds, resulting in mass deletions of works or the shutdown of websites. But there must be some middle ground between total censorship and the kind of free rein that puts vulnerable people in danger, and I strongly encourage the board of AO3 to seek this middle ground out.

But it’s the community itself that needs to shape up; AO3 is, after all, a community-led website built by fans for fans, so the fact that this website has such issues is a reflection of the issues that run deeply within the people who created it. Aku didn’t talk to me with the intention of doing me harm, or so I believe at this time, and she didn’t pursue me as a lone wolf or in isolation.

She was simply a particularly brazen member of a community that was used to having inappropriate conversations with young people and sexualising everything they did. Even people my own age were jokingly pushing me into discussing and consuming extremely sexual content. It was just normal. That’s what I want to say here. Inside the world of fandom on AO3, the grooming of children with sexual content is normal. And that’s scary.

- Mod Daft

[onebizarrekai]

I went on an unfiltered positive soapbox rant in a doc about green oak last night at 1am

please note that I usually post with moderation on my language but this rant does not have this

I have to give you the original. I have to

yo it’s almost 1 in the fucking morning and I played pokemon for 4 fucking hours today and I’m gonna ramble about GARY FUCKING OAK

LISTEN CAREFULLY. ok listen

to start off my ted talk with something partially irrelevant, I cannot get over the fact that green and gary are almost 2 very distinct personalities. they have similarities, but in my head, green has a genuine capacity to be personally malicious, while gary exists for the sole purpose of being as much of a chad as possible

scale of oak: <————————————————> emo bitch         smartass       tax fraud (manga)             (game)              (show)

(I haven’t read the manga in like 10 years and I’m having these vague recollections and I’m like whoa god. I forgot that red and green didn’t know each other in the manga they were literally strangers it’s so weird also they were ALL SO YOUNG)

so basically, gary is a hilarious fucking character whom cade (my brother) and I have distorted beyond belief by making him a rich snob and making endless tax history jokes, and green oak, green fucking oak, is a much more elaborate human being.

real character development as a real life person is growing up and realizing that green is your favorite pokemon character, and not just because he’s comically an asshole and easily mockable, it’s also because he goes through so much fucking implicit character development and it’s VERY IMPORTANT AND COOL.

call it extra and biased but fuck off. no character in pokemon has ever gotten more character development than green oak, and not seeing any of it happen on screen is actually really interesting.

pokemon isn’t generally about character development beyond the dialogue you see on the screen. I mean, apparently it’s little enough about the story that sword and shield completely bailed on the idea of actually having a fucking story, even though sun and moon had a pretty decent one. ANYWAY, green oak is such a fucking cool character because there’s so much room for speculation, and I’m gonna go on a list of reasons why everything about this is neat.

1. he is the only character whom you actually see change in a pokemon game off camera and between long timespans, to my recollection. the only thing to compare this to is the transition between the two fifth gen stories, and while my memory is foggy since I only played black 2 once, I don’t remember any of the characters in that game changing much at all. maybe cheren became less of a dick, whatever. no one cares because he has absolutely no subtext.

2. red is the only protagonist in pokemon history who has made a second appearance. red is a real fucking person, a real pokemon character, and isn’t just a convenient fill-in for the player who gets thrown away after the game is over (LOOKING AT YOU, BLACK 2 AND WHITE 2). green’s relationship to red, no matter how damaged, is a real thing, and a real story element. this is never done in any other pokemon game. green is the only rival whose story continues after the game is over because his counterpart continues to exist.

3. the context of the game. after green barreled through the entirety of kanto, talking red down all the while, and then becoming champion, he gets beaten by red once and for all and his dream of being champion is torn right out of his hands moments after being obtained. everything green cared about is taken away from him by the person he was always mean to. karma, bitch.

so green becomes the 8th gym leader. it doesn’t take two moments of thinking about this to understand how much he doesn’t want this. it’s like, settling for 6th best after your dream job falls through, since nobody knows how the structure of the elite four works.

to top it all off, red RUNS THE FUCK AWAY TO A GODFORSAKEN MOUNTAIN. he takes everything away from green, shatters his world, and then won’t even take the dream that green wanted. can you imagine how mad he’d be about that? green is already having an existential crisis about his behavior problems, he doesn’t need this fucking bullshit. somehow lance becomes the new champion meanwhile even though he’s an elite four member. you’d think green would at least take his place, or something. the amount that I’m confused about this is probably also applies to green. there’s a chance that green rejected the position of champion due to being defeated by red right away, and all the shame he got, but even so, it undoubtably would have taken a toll on him.

finally, here’s the kicker. in spite of all this, green doesn’t make it his business to end the world or some shit. in spite of this, he becomes a better person. green fucking oak has a fucking soul. also, it’s been a VERY long time since I’ve played all of soulsilver, but does green ever complain about red being isolated on mt silver? maybe that’s wishful thinking.

final bout: after years and years, green and red arrive in alola together as grownass men. red came down from the fucking mountain, and green is the one he came to the islands with. this implication of reconcile is so FUCKING IMPORTANT because of what these two have been through for like, the last 20 years.

you cannot POSSIBLY look at this like it’s not a big deal. like, they didn’t just “grow up and get over it.” red had to kick green aside to become the champion (which is still such a fucking good conclusion for the game, like, thinking back on it having a rival who’s a dick to you for the whole game and then destroying his life is grimly poetic), RAN AWAY TO A MOUNTAIN and gave up the title, indicating to green that it didn’t even matter to him (whether he meant that or not, whatever, running away to a mountain is fucking stupid), and in spite of all this, they ended up reconciling. they reconciled. green could have been mad at red for the rest of his life for destroying his dream, regardless of how he treated red when they were younger. maybe green figured that he still had a shot at becoming champion again, but maybe that’s the point. he continues to want to be stronger than red but doesn’t let it carry into how he treats people anymore.

I’m curious, though. what really happened? did red and green put it all behind them? did they deem there someone to blame? did red just become the champion to get back at green after all, and then ran away because he didn’t know how to live with it? or did he run away because it truly didn’t matter to him? or did red become the champion purely out of his own self goals and wasn’t even thinking about green? if so, why did he run away? so many things to think about.

anyway, tldr, green has been through more character development than any other pokemon character and I adore him

also. where the fuck is gold. he defeated red and then ceased to exist

update: in heartgold and soulsilver, green doesn’t seem to know where red is, but in some of his dialogue over call, he tells you that you “remind him of someone” and he mumbles dejectedly about red before hanging up

[barnesandrogersfanfics]

Ocean Eyes - Part 11

A/N- OMG i finally updated!!

Please like/comment/share if you like this. Seeing that people are actually enjoying this fic makes me wanna write more lol 💕💕

I got next to no sleep, i just laid in bed going over and over the things Chris had said....was he being serious?? or was it the alcohol talking??

Finally giving up on sleep at 5:30am i got up and dressed and decided i needed to talk to someone about all this. When i went downstairs i made a cup of tea and grabbed Chris's coat from the back of the chair then headed outback, Dodger following behind me.

I walked down to the pool area and sat down at the table and chairs that were next to it where i was far enough away from the house to have a private conversation. I unlocked my phone smiling at the photo of Chris, Scott and Mason before scrolling to my recent contacts and hitting call.

"Hello" she answered after two rings.

"Hey ma, i didnt wake you did i?"

"No sweetheart, you know me I've been up since 5am"

"Thats because you're crazy" i chuckled.

"why are you up this early? This is very unlike you"

"Ive not really slept..... mom something happened with Chris last night and i'm kinda freaking out...."

"Oh god please tell me you haven't slept with him already....."

"No! Jesus Ma...."

"Thats good, so what happened?"

"Well after Mason went to bed last night i stayed up with Chris and Scott, we had a few drinks and just hung out you know? Everything was fine until Scott went to bed" i started explaining shaking my head, i told her all about Chris ending things with his girlfriend, about him getting jealous about Derek and then i dropped the kicker.... Chris confessed to still loving me and wanting a second chance!

"Wow, thats alot to take in"

"Tell me about it! Ive been up all night going over it again and again"

"So what did you tell Chris?"

"I just said that we needed to talk about this when we were both sober. I mean he could wake up and forget he even said any of this to me last night"

"Would you still bring it up if he does forget?"

"I don't know Ma, i don't know what to do"

"Only you can answer that, i can't tell you the right thing to do here baby. All i know is that you have loved that man since i can remember, even when he left and broke your heart you still loved him"

"You love who you love right?.... i just feel like an idiot" i mumbled picking at the sleeve of Chris's coat nervously.

"You're not an idiot"

"I feel like one!"

"Just talk to him, take things slow.... maybe use this time together to get to know eachother again before you decide on anything. Also, just remember this effects Mason now"

"Thats what makes it worse ma" i quickly wiped away a tear that rolled down my face, Dodger came over putting his face in my lap and i smiled as i scratched behind his ear. When i looked up my breath caught when i saw Chris slipping out the sliding door and heading my way.

"Shit, he's coming over.... i gotta go Ma. I'll call you later"

"Okay sweetheart, good luck.... deep breaths, i love you"

"Love you too, bye".

I locked my phone and placed it on the table before wrapping Chris's coat tighter around me. Dodger spotted Chris and went bounding over to him excited to see him up and about.

"Morning, you're up early" he said before sitting in the chair beside me.

"Morning, i couldn't sleep. Thought id call my mom to check in"

"All the way out here?"

"Its early i didn't want to wake anyone up" i shrugged picking up my tea taking a mouthful.

"You sure thats all it was?"

"Mmhmmm"

"You're not hiding from me after last night?" He raised his eyebrows at me questioningly.

"So you remember what you said last night?"

"Of course, i wasn't that drunk" he scoffed reaching for my tea and helping himself to a few mouthfuls.

"Im not hiding, just.... thinking"

"About?"

"About what the fuck i'm supposed to do!"

"Do you love me?" He suddenly asked making me look up at him, into those eyes.... damn him!

"What?"

"Do you still love me? Its a simple question babe"

"Its not a simple answer Chris" i shrugged "i mean of course i do but i just..... the way you treated me before.... how do i know that wont happen again?"

"It wont i promise! I know how bad i messed up...."

"You say that now but i can't help but worry about you changing your mind.

You broke my heart when you left me and now we have Mason to think about.... i don't want him getting hurt if this doesn't work out again".

"So your answer's no? You wont give me a second chance?" He asked sadly his eyes tearing up, i forgot how emotional he could get.

"Maybe we should just spend this time together, get to know each other again and go from there?" I said taking my mom's advise.

"So you're not ruling it out completely? Its not a hard no?"

"Im saying maybe, just... baby steps" i smiled over at him and he nodded smiling back at me as he reached over and took my hand.

"I promise you i wont let you down again, i wanna be the man you deserve and the dad that Mason deserves"

"Id like that a lot, even though i hated you for what you did... i still missed you"

"I know, i missed you too"

"Lets go in im freezing" i said getting up, Chris was suddenly standing and pulling me into his arms holding me tight.

"Chris..." i mumbled into his chest as my hands landed on his waist.

"Im sorry i just needed to hold you"

I sighed and wrapped my arms around him... as nervous as this made me it felt so good to be in his arms again.

"I'll make things right again i promise" he mumbled pressing a kiss to the top of my head.

The weeks were flying by and we were all still in lockdown, it was now May and there was no sign of anything changing just yet.

Chris was doing a lot of online interviews to promote his new show 'Defending Jacob', when these video chats took place Scott and I made sure to take Mason to another part of the house so he wouldn't interrupt.

Things with Chris and I had been going good, we wouldn't act any differently around Mason but once he was in bed we'd snuggle on the sofa.... we'd shared a few kisses here and there but thats as far as it had gone.

"Mom can we take Dodger for a walk?" Mason came running in from the backyard with Dodger diving on the sofa next to me.

"You better go ask your dad buddy"

"Dad!!!!" Mason yelled loudly making me laugh.

"Why are you yelling?? i'm right here" Chris said walking in from the kitchen with coffee's. Mason chuckled cuddling up to me suddenly going all silly.

"Why you getting all shy?" I asked as i run my fingers through his hair.

"I don't know" he mumbled hiding his face against me, Chris sat down next to him and picked him up pulling him into his lap.

"Whats up pal? Why was you calling me?"

"Mom said i had to ask you if we can take Dodger for a walk"

"Sure we can! Why don't you go get your shoes on and grab Dodgers leash while your mom and i finish our coffee then we'll go"

"Yes!! thank you dad!" Mason wriggled down from Chris's lap and run upstairs to the room he'd been staying in.

"Maybe it'll wear him out enough that he has a nap, kid has too much energy!" I said looking over at Chris.

"He loves walking Dodger thats all"

"So do i but not this much! Poor Dodge is probably begging for a rest!"

"He's fine, we'll just walk up the road a bit throw the ball around... we don't have to be gone long"

"I guess"

"You coming with us?"

"Yeah why not".

We walked Dodger as promised and let him and Mason run around playing fetch. Chris took me by surprise by grabbing hold of my hand pulling me close enough to kiss me.

"Hey! We said not in front of Mace...."

"He's not looking its fine" he laughed "so, i was thinking maybe you could stay in my room tonight?"

"And what if Mason catches us??"

"We'll say we're having a sleepover" he smirked.

"You're terrible!"

"You didn't say no though" he wriggled his eyebrows at me.

"I didn't say yes either. Mace, come on Bud we're heading back" i called out stepping away from Chris even though all i wanted to do was pounce on him!

As i looked over to where Mason and Dodger were playing i spotted a familiar car parked across the street outside of the gated area.

"You've got to be shitting me....."

"Whats wrong?"

"Thats Brian's car out there"

"What?!!! Are you sure?"

"Yeah"

"Im gonna kick this guys ass i swear to god...." Chris said as he started to storm towards Brian, i quickly grabbed his arm pulling him back.

"Lets just go back inside, call the police. I don't want you getting into trouble over that jackass. Just get Mason and Dodger and lets go. He cant get in here"

"Okay.... okay lets go" he whistled for Dodger who came bounding over followed by an out of breath Mason and we walked back up to the house locking ourselves safely inside while Chris called and reported Brian.

Everything taglist: @jesseswartzwelder @dumblani @barnesandrogersworld @patzammit @rynabarnesrogers-reading @rainbowkisses31 @rororo06 @supernaturalwintersoldier @fairlightswiftly @hiddelstannerbarnes

Ocean eyes: @supraveng @michelehansel @melissaglenn5 @denisemarieangelina

@mrsjeffwittek @mery-be @marvelfansworld @cmalass @capstopavenger @fallenoutofrose @kelbabyblue @biebsmylife95 @loser-alert @traceyaudette @w3lissax @jennmurawski13 @ford66steal @saiyanprincessswanie @christocrave

@jakiki94 @torntaltos @my-dearest-agent @buchanansebba @ms-betsy-fangirl

[kiefbowl]

I want to believe you're right about it being a moral panic, but do you worry the internet and social media will make it harder to fade away?

No. Social Media is likely a cultural ephemeral like most things. It already has been. Social media has changed drastically in 20 years more than once, and popular platforms have already collapsed. In this age of social media, it’s clear they have become mechanisms of advertisement and we’re the product, and if I would predict is that people will drop social media platforms like facebook and instagram and move towards reddit and tumblr and/or whatever new successful blogging/forum site will be, and younger people who are growing up with addicted parents/exposure to criticisms of social media/general lack of interest getting involved in the internet in the same way as “lame” older generations - will stop signing up for these platforms. Additionally, social movement around the injustice of gig/influencer economy as a primary form of income for people who otherwise cannot make income might incite more and more backlash against the platforms as more and more people want real political solutions towards the economic inequality in their countries, and again new sign ups will drop if the platform refuses to adapt.  

However, regardless of the staying power of social media or social media in it’s current forms, I think the fear of TERFs and the acceptance of trans rhetoric will go through the same natural cycle of other moral panics, whatever that is. For lack of a better word, “normie” people make up the majority of people. They are not fully bought in, and their motivations for their beliefs regarding these two things (terfs & trans) is ego motivated. The second it is inconvenient to believe TERFs are real and are doing real harm, they will not only drop the belief they will forgot they even had them because they never bought in 100%. They only have the beliefs now because it is socially beneficial to do so, and confirms some sort of bias they already have. The second critical thought of trans activism swings back to being seen as liberal, they’ll pick those thoughts up and will be unaware of the waffling. They will see it as natural progression of the beliefs they already had and/or will accept any argument presented to them that they’re willing to adopt as “new” regardless of how long people might have been making the same argument. All it takes is one watershed story or moment or person giving legitimacy, and people will jump aboard as long as they were never really bought in to begin with. The kicker is they will not recognize their jump. 

I’m speaking in pretty broad terms, but this is regarding people who participate in a moral panic or social movement w/o fully investing in it, which is going to be most people per each moral panic. People who aren’t critical of the information they’re receiving about trans activism or TERFs probably have other issues they are invested in, and experience the same sort of frustrations we do within their own smaller, invested communities. The arguments are so clear and accessible and obvious to them about their particular fields of interest and involvement, but they don’t recognize when they don’t put the same level of effort to vet other information that is only tangentially related to their interests (like for example - being a liberal or being a conservative, or being seen as tolerant and open minded - rather than a specific interest of theirs). We all do this.